#album: distance or decay

[lyricallymnded]

lyricallymnded’s end of year celebration! | nikki’s favorite songs released in 2022

circles // in her own words & derek discanio

[tomsmusictaste]

Tom’s Top Ten | ALBUMS 2022

Ok, 2022 has been a wild ride for music, there have been some absolutely incredible releases across the board, probably the hardest time I've had getting the definitive top ten since 2016 in terms of there just being so much good stuff! Also been something of a wild ride for this blog, I broke a thousand followers (and thank you all so much 🥰) and started getting a lot more asks from you guys than I used to have, which has been very cool — but anyway, let’s get into what you’re really here for: the music! Without further ado, here are my personal Top Ten Albums of 2022!

10. Harder Than It Looks by Simple Plan

This is one of my favourite start-to finish releases from Simple Plan in a long time; their past few albums I was meh on, but this one worked for me - the singles The Antidote and Ruin My Life were absolute bangers that both made my Wrapped, super cool for them to be working and touring with Sum 41 after all this time, an absolute solid record from SP here.

Favourite song: Ruin My Life (feat. Deryck Whibley)

9. Crisis Of Faith by Billy Talent

This one was a long-time coming; with a fairly sparse distribution of singles over the lockdown years it feels like the wind got knocked out of the sails in the build-up to this album, the album itself didn't disappoint. While I don't think it's as good as Afraid Of Heights was, it was certainly a very solid output with some incredible catchy songs.

Favourite song: Hanging Out With All The Wrong People

8. That Ain’t It by Gold Steps

Contrary to the album's name, this one very much was "it." Now various sources went back and forth over whether this was an album or EP, but y'know what, it's got enough songs and they're all fucking BANGERS! I vaguely knew of these guys before this year because they'd toured with Settle Your Scores, but I'm so glad I started paying more attention to them this year because this record was great.

Favourite song: Love Song

7. Distance Or Decay by In Her Own Words

Had never heard of these guys until I saw the video for their song with Derek from State Champs, and from there I was hooked. I'm definitely glad I found these guys during the run-up to this album, because the album itself is stellar. It earned itself several repeat listens from me this year.

Favourite song: Raining In Toronto (feat. Jonathan Vigil)

6. I Went To Hell And Back by As It Is

Rarely do As It Is release an album that does't end up on this list and with IWTHAB they'd done it again! A bit more experimental than their previous work, but stacked to the rafters with banger after banger, definitely a great one to listen to during a frustrating time early on in the year.

Favourite songs: I Miss 2003

5. Luv Sux by Avril Lavigne

I am honestly quite surprised by how much I liked Avril's new album, but from the moment Bite Me was released I had a strong incling it was gonna end up on this list - a return to early 00s' guitar driven sound is present throughout and her voice is still as great as it ever was.

Favourite song: Bite Me

4. Planet Zero by Shinedown

Shinedown!!! This was definitely the year of my Shinedown awakening, after previously only really knowing 'Enemies' and 'Unity' by them, I saw them at Download Festival and realised I had been sleeping on them before now. Since then I have been listening hard to their entire discography, all the way up to this year's release, Planet Zero, which was phenomenal! And it got released on my birthday, so that's an added bonus!

Favourite song: The Saints Of Violence And Innuendo

3. f.e.a.r. (fuck everything and run) by Stand Atlantic

The vibes of this album are IMMACULATE. While I've liked StAts previous albums a lot, it feels like in this one they have really hit their stride and found their sound. Bonnie's voice is great, the features are great, it's got such a fun atmosphere throughout the whole thing. Definitely Stand Atlantic's best work yet.

Favourite song: molotov (ok)

2. Upright Animals by Dragged Under

Last time I had Dragged Under on a top ten albums list they just snuck in at the ninth or tenth spot. With the last album I liked it well enough but I wasn't blown away by it. This album? I was BLOWN AWAY by it. Similar to StAt, it feels like they really found their sound in this one, I had this on a damn-near constant repeat after it came out, there's not a single skip on the album, every single song is just top notch. There's still a good variety keeping the balance between the more pop-punk stuff and the heavier stuff, but this time they don't feel like they 'kinda sound like ADTR' - this time they feel like they are definitively Dragged Under. This whole album was banger.

Favourite song: Long Live The King

Ok so now I’m gonna pull a WatchMojo and throw out some Honourable Mentions; those go to: Suckerpunch by Maggie Lindemann, Baku’s Revenge by Magnolia Park, Imposter Syndrome by Action/Adventure and Run by Future Palace

So now, to reveal which album made the number one spot 🥁🥁🥁

My ALBUM OF THE YEAR for 2022 is…

1. Kings Of The New Age by State Champs 👑👑👑

I honesty had a really tough time figuring out what order these final four were gonna go in, but as I was putting them into this list it became clear there really couldn't be any other choice for AOTY this year. After a, not bad, but not stand-out release in Living Proof, KOTNA brought the Champs back with a Bang! You know what I wanted to do the first time I finished listening to this record? Listen to it again! I will say the one thing that I thought could've been better on this was more integration with the featured guests in the songs, but the guest spots themselves are all really good! Especially Ben Barlow's and Four Year Strong's. As the guys themselves say, they are 'here to stay' and I for one am glad. This era of State Champs is glorious and I cannot wait for what's next, because it really does seem like it's all uphill from here.

And there you have it! Those are my Top Ten Albums of the 2022!

[calypsocolada]

THE PROPHECY | t. shigaraki

synopsis: tomura doesn't want to be your enemy anymore. authors note: hi hi hi. been working on this fic for a few weeks. it's sort of a continuation of the first kiss fic with him in it. also I'm working on a few other fics and requests and hope you enjoy this one in the meantime. it's a lot longer than I thought it was gonna be. also with the release of tswifts new album expect a few little nods to her songs... cw: blood, gore, suggestive, enemies to lovers, lovesick!tomura, obession, fem reader wc: 5k

click here for my masterlist

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He watched you from afar. He watched your television broadcasts and studied your face as though he’d missed something the first hundred times. He remembered your smiles, and could decipher whether real or fake. He’d visit places you had been and imagine you there now. Future number one hero. His number one. Tomura was sick. Sick in the head, sick in his chest, his heart, dark and decrepit only beat for the sun. His days were dark and gray until he saw your shining face. So bright sometimes it made his stomach turn. He wouldn’t call it an obsession. It was something far worse. He didn’t just want you. He needed you. He needed all of you. Wanted your things in his room. Wanted your body sprawled over his bed in one of his worn t-shirts. Wanted you eating at his kitchen table, something only he cooked for you. He wanted to hear you talk to him. To say his name. Wanted your eyes on his and your hands on him. He wanted your time and your heart and your being. He couldn’t have it though. The prophecy that encircled him was stuck on its unwavering path. Even you couldn’t deter his fate.   

Sometimes he thinks about the first time he saw you. Only when he’s alone and no one can see just how far gone he truly is. 

Him in company with the shadows as you were announced as the next pro hero. You were standing on some podium. The microphone was taller than you as you reached for it and it yelped with feedback. You had laughed it off and cleared your throat. You looked radiant, with glowing skin and bright hopeful eyes. You were signed to Endeavors squad. Tomura knew you were stronger than that bumbling fire breathing idiot. But still you smiled just as bright. 

All that untapped potential within you. Those powers could cause devastation if in a villain's hands. Which is why All For One asked Tomura to keep an eye on you in the first place. To see when the time to strike and steal those powers would be. But Tomura was past that. You had far more meaningful things he wanted rather than your powers.

You had thanked Endeavor after he gave a speech introducing you, your hand wrapping around the mic. Tomura fed off the shadows, after all they were giving him the ability to see you in person. It was an unreal feeling. Your speech wasn’t too long and you ended it before your eyes could well up with tears. The last words of your speech swirling around in Tomura’s head. 

“I have always wanted to do good. I’ve always wanted to be a hero. Thank you for giving me the chance to do just that.” 

He could see that good in you. Could see that swirling hope, that devotion to all things just. He unfortunately could see All-Might's influence. Endeavor walked over and placed a hand on your shoulder and Tomura felt something sick churning. He didn’t like people touching you. He knew you were nice, maybe too nice to say anything but he’d gladly be your voice if you needed it. When it was over you had walked out to meet people. Tomura watched you still. You were like some drug he couldn’t fend himself off of. He followed you at a healthy distance through the crowd. He wanted to see if he could corrupt you. See if he could drive you to the edge. See if those powers could be used for more than just causes. He could grab the man standing beside him and use decay. He could create mass panic. He could see your powers up close, could feel the weight of your stare. But as he got closer he saw you bending over to smile at a little girl. He heard your laugh and melancholy voice telling the little girl that if you could be a hero, anyone could. His reaching hand paused when you straightened and turned, almost like you felt the heat of his piercing eyes. Like you had a feeling creeping down your spine. Good intuition. He turned to leave just as your eyes found his. Just that split second of eye contact sent him pushing his way through the crowd and towards the exit as though he had just committed some atrocity and needed a quick exit. 

You two crossed paths many times after that day. Tomura did learn the full force of your attention and it completely turned himself in on his once well sought after goals. Because now… you became his goal. His ultimate end. He wouldn’t mind dying if only it was by your hands. There was no saving him, no redemption for you to give him but death. He could see it in your piercing eyes. Could feel it in the way you fought him. You didn’t fight like other heroes. You had something to prove. Most heroes in your position would be cocky. But not you. No you were calculating and smart, but above all… you were vicious with him. Those powers were something to fear and Tomura loved them more for it. The one person that could end his endless suffering was also the root of it. 

And the moment had finally come for him. After fighting, Tomura’s endurance wavering, he saw a thirst for blood in your eyes. A hunger so deep he knew you could never feel the same for him in a million millennia. And when the time came he accepted the death you’d grant him with open arms. 

But you didn’t grant him a thing. 

You had every opportunity to but you hesitated. Tomura saw it. Saw the quickest of uncertainties pass your heavenly face. Your eyes flitting up to him. The eye contact was nothing like he’d ever experienced before in his miserable life. You weren’t looking at him with anger or contempt. But something else. Something he wishes he could ask you to explain. He watched your lips part and heard you suck in a breath, not realizing he’d been holding his own. 

“Well… what’re you waiting for, hero?” He asked. This moment like something right out of his stupid daydreams. You tightened your grip slightly at the sound of his voice but that uncertainty stayed. Tomura couldn’t help but glance at your lips. After all this was probably the last time he’d ever see them this closely. And he couldn’t help but get caught up, to just stare and drink in his fill before his demise. You flinched when he looked back up and right then and there he knew you couldn’t kill him. He didn’t know what it was but he could feel it as deeply as he felt for you. 

“I can’t.“ You affirmed his suspicions. Tomura’s stomach clenched. He’d never heard your voice this close, speak this softly. He melted at the moment. You let out a ragged breath and there was a moment shared before Tomura saw Dabi’s blue flames travel towards your unguarded back. Tomura acted without even thinking. He gripped you by the shoulders and spun you out of the line of fire. You felt the heat graze against your shoulder before your back hit the ground, Tomura shielding you with his own body. He was burned badly with that little move. He groaned above you, shooting a glare back at Dabi. You stared at him above you in utter shock and confusion. He’d just saved your life. He stared at your mouth then saved your life. And you couldn’t kill him. You had every opportunity to end everything right here and now. He was already injured, you could finish it all here and now. But when Tomura turned and your eyes met again you couldn’t do it. Tomura reached for you, his thumb just barely wiping dirt from your cheek. It was surprisingly intimate. Until you realized the hand touching you was the same one that could easily turn you to dust. You were quick to act, quick to fire up your powers and send Tomura back towards the fire. Something burned in you, some feeling of guilt as you struggled to your feet and ran off towards the rest of the hero’s that had started to fall back. Tomura hit the ground hard, slightly startled by the force in which you sent him flying. He rose and watched you meeting back up with the rest of the hero’s. Watched Hawks run over and meet you halfway, grabbing you gently and looking you over for any wounds. Tomura felt his stomach twist in a sickening way. Jealousy like a vice around his chest. 

You had tossed and turned all night. Unable to turn your mind off. The events of the day played in a loop. Fighting Tomura, taking him to the ground. The curious way he looked at you. The curious way you looked back. The inability to kill him after everything. You could justify trying again if he hadn’t saved you. He saved you. Tomura Shigaraki saved your damn life. He took a burn for you. And then he touched your cheek. Without evil intent. And the look in his eyes when he did it. That’s what haunted you so stunningly and consistently for the entire night. You sighed heavily, turning over in your bed, running a stressed hand through your hair. 

Was this a thing now? That hesitation that took such deep root, that act of kindness to keep you from the flames. What if he had done it to confuse you? To test your allegiances. If so you had failed sort of spectacularly. Letting him touch you and feeling something when he did. You sat up instantly. You felt something when he touched you. You felt something when you watched his eyes watching your lips. You pushed out of bed and felt the cold flooring beneath your feet as you rushed from your room. You needed to do something… anything to get your mind off of him. In your haste you slammed right into Hawks. 

“Woah… hey there you alright?” He asked, steadying you. You cleared your throat. 

“Y-yeah, just hungry.” You lied. Hawks slightly cocked his head as he surveyed you for a moment. 

“You seem… rattled.” Hawks says. You look up at him a little too quickly. You shake your head. 

“I’m fine.” You say and slightly cringe because you did not sound fine. But Hawks wasn’t one to pry. He just gave you a small smile and nodded his head. 

“Well… you know where to find me if you aren’t actually fine.” He says before walking off to his room. You turn slightly as you watch him walk away. You suddenly wished he was who you were laying up at night thinking about. Wished you could chase him down now and release the pent up energy that swirled within you. But that wouldn’t be fair to him because you’d be thinking of someone else. You ran a stressed hand down your face and proceeded to the kitchen. After you ate and calmed down a bit you were able to wrangle in those unruly thoughts. Just because he saved you once doesn’t mean he deserves to take up rent in your head. The man was evil. You’d spent the better part of a year facing off with him and his followers. He doesn’t deserve your hesitation or confusion. The next time you faced off with him would be the last.

Tomura could only watch as his mind was stolen, watching his body being overtaken by a force he wasn’t strong enough to stop. All for One’s control taking over. He knew he had seconds left before he’d no longer cease to be himself. You burned with hatred beneath him, your left arm broken and useless, your right hand holding some sharp shrapnel that you’d plunged desperately into his side, your powers flickering weakly within you. He didn’t feel the pain. Your eyes flashed, his hands around your neck, squeezing. Someone was going to win here but… it wasn’t going to be him. 

He pulled you hard, the fire in your eyes licking and burning his own but he couldn’t care less. If he was going to die he was going to make one last grave mistake that might send him to the grave earlier than expected. He leaned down where you were pinned beneath him and with impressive force, smashed his lips against your own. 

The kiss was like a fight. Like all your other fights. But lips instead of fists. With breaths instead of words. With groans instead of screams and growls. His hands gripped your face hard to keep you where he wanted you. You, in a fit of confusion and pure survival instinct twisted the shrapnel in his side. He gasped in pain but that only spurred him on, his mouth cracking yours open in a feverish attempt to be as close as humanly possible. He had no indication whether or not you wanted this until the pain ceased and he felt your tongue brush against his. His breathing hitched, muddled with pain and sorrow and complete obsession. He pulled you off the ground roughly and kissed you until you both  were gasping for air. When he pulled back the state he left you in was enough to satisfy him for years. Your lips were kissed pink and wet, your cheeks had a wicked blush across them as you stared at him with utter bewilderment and something else that had his stomach tangling in knots within him.

He resigned himself to death then. He was guilty as sin.

Your hand was still on the hilt of your shrapnel that was embedded in his side as you stared at each other. Breaths heavy. Tomura didn’t know how to be kind. He didn’t know how to be soft. He’d never kissed anyone before and it should’ve been pretty damn suspicious when the first person he’d ever felt the need to devour with his lips was the one standing opposite of him in this endless war. The one he needed to destroy. And to say he wanted to devour you was almost an understatement. He wanted to climb into your body and live in your ribcage, safe and tucked away. He wanted to be inside you, wanted that mind of yours to only know him, wanted those pink lips to only speak his name, those pretty eyes to only meet him. The obsession was endless. He wanted it more than ever right now. Death knocking down his rotted door. So bad that he hadn’t even noticed his own tears before they fell and hit your cheeks. You blinked a few times, slowly coming back down from the clouds. Tomura reached for you a last time, the pad of his thumb swiping his tears off your cheek. 

“Save me, hero.” He breathed out before everything went black. 

Your breathing staggered as you watched Tomura change before your eyes into something else. You had been warned about Tomura’s connection to All For One but you let yourself get caught up in the moment. You were able to take advantage of the moment and put a little distance between you and the hijacker. You could hear Hawks calling for you somewhere but you weren’t leaving this. Tomura had asked you to save him. With tears in his eyes. And god dammit you were going to save him if it killed you.

“I know you're still in there,” You call out, voice steadier than it had been all day long. The hijacker looked up and the smile was pure evil. All For One. You’d never met him in person and without Aizawa here to cancel his quirk you were dead in the water. But you weren’t leaving.

“Tomura’s not here, girl. But he sends his condolences.” Even his voice didn’t sound the same. You kept your head high and even though your body screamed in pain you got ready to fight. 

“Get out of his head.”

“You sound like you care, hero?” You flinched at the nickname. It didn’t sound as good coming from him. 

“I can’t ignore someone in trouble.” You say, your heart speeding slightly as All for One laughs. 

“Is that so?” He asks, cocking his head. “As though you weren’t seconds away from killing him before I took over.” You were slightly relieved he didn’t seem to know what had transpired moments before he took over.

“He asked for help.”

“Does he deserve your help?”

“Everyone deserves help.” You shoot back defiantly. All for One just laughs, walking towards you. Your powers flickered weakly within you and you felt overwhelming fear, felt the urge to run. But you stayed put. 

“How about a trade, hmm?” He asked. You stared at him. He wasn’t to be trusted, you know that. But still… 

“A trade?” You echoed.

“I’ll give him back to you if you hand over those powers willingly.” All for One stated. You stared at him. All you ever wanted in life was to be a hero. You were blessed to have powers like these and as much as you wanted to save Tomura, these powers in All For One’s hands would only cause death and destruction. 

“I- can’t.” You said and watched a sympathetic smile spread across All for One’s stolen features. 

“Some hero you are.” He said. “And to think this host pathetically loved you for years.” Your eyes cut to his. 

“What?”

“You heard me. What an idiot he was, thinking you could save him.” You saw red. You charged without even thinking, your powers flaring up as you hit All for One square in the jaw. He lost a few steps, blood dripping from his lips as he laughed and laughed and laughed. “You’re bold.” He said and you burned. You only had one good arm and you hit him again and again until you couldn’t feel your knuckles, your hand bruised and battered. You screamed to let Tomura free but your words fell to uncaring ears. All for One caught one of your punches and sent you flying. You crashed into some loose debris. You coughed up blood and dizzily tried to push yourself to your feet. Your endurance was gone, at this point you’d been fighting for hours. You were past your limit, undoubtedly bleeding externally and internally. But still you pushed to your feet only to be caught by the throat and slammed into the wall. All for One pinned you there, with your feet not touching the ground you gasped and sputtered for air. You kicked hard but All For One just laughed it off. “You’re a strong one, hero. I’ll give you a valiant death.” Fear gripped your heart and in a last ditch desperate act you grabbed the closest thing you could find and sunk it into the flesh of All for One’s arm. He didn’t budge. With his hand around your throat, blackness danced around the edge of your vision. You had no strength left. You were going to die. 

“Tomura-” You struggled to breathe, your voice coming out in a choking gasp. Somehow… you’d grown to care. “Come…back.”

When you woke up it was a startling affair. You sat up quickly, gasping and reaching for your throat, you felt the tender flesh there, undoubtedly bruised. Warm covers fell from your body as you looked around. You were in some small cabin, a fire burning in the hearth, a soft orange glow lightening the room. You were bandaged up pretty thoroughly, your arm in a sling. You pushed the covers from your body and swung your legs around to the edge of the bed and that’s when you saw him. Sleeping soundly in the wooden rocker beside your bed was Tomura. His hair was damp and falling in stringy curls around his face. You stared at him, unable to look away. What had happened? It was clear to you that some time had passed since fighting All for One since it was dark outside. But how you got here and with Tomura was a complete mystery. You silently move to your feet and wrap the cover around your freezing body. You move towards the door, hand inching towards the door knob.

“Leaving without a word?” You flinch hard at his sleepy voice. Hand stopping before it touches the knob. You don’t turn to face him, ashamed after everything.

“Where am I?” You ask over your shoulder. You hear Tomura sit up in the chair.

“A cabin, safe.” 

“Not good enough.” You snap, turning slightly. Your eyes meet and you instantly regret turning. Tomura is looking at you in a way that makes your stomach flip. Tomura stands and you pull the covers tighter around yourself. He walks to you and you take a step back. Was All for One still in control? Was this an act? As though he read your thoughts he held up his hands in mock surrender.

“It’s me.”

“How?” You question, keeping up your guard. Even if it was him the air between you two would still be foggy. He kissed you when you thought he was going to kill you. You weren’t sure at all where you stood. 

“I heard you.” He says softly. “I heard your voice and it… gave me purpose.” He doesn’t reach for you but a part of you wishes he had. You hazard another look in his eyes. What was this spell that suddenly had such a tight hold over you? This feeling that only sprung when he first touched you. Just looking in his eyes made your knees weak. But you were good at maintaining a poker face. 

“Purpose to finish the job yourself?” You ask. Tomura doesn’t react to your venom, it was as though he expected it. He looks away from you.

“I won’t ever kill you. Not even if my life depended on it.” He says. You stare at him.

“I don’t understand.”

“You… affected me, hero. It’s not something I can… explain exactly.”

“Try.” You say sharply. Tomura looked slightly stressed, he ran a hand through his hair, his shirt popping up slightly. You blush and turn away. Tomura couldn’t even imagine this moment in a million years. You, standing mere feet from him, cheeks pink, moments from a confession he didn’t even know how to word. He was sure his kiss spoke volumes. 

“It’s rather simple,” He starts, taking a hazardous step towards you. Your eyes cut up to his, watching his every move. “I don’t think of you as my enemy.” You suck in a silent breath, your lips parting in surprise. You didn’t have to ask what he meant by that. You were sure that kiss was a power move and that he’d gotten the better of you. But it seems you have had the better of him for quite a while. You pulled the cover closer as though it could shield you from something you didn’t quite understand just yet. But… you wanted to understand.

“You saved me. From Dabi’s fire weeks ago. I… never got to thank you.”

“You being alive is thanks enough.” Tomura says. Your heart skips in your chest. You breathe in somewhat unsteadily.

“How long… How long was I out?” You ask, clearing your throat.

“Just a few hours. After I got control back everything sort of fell into chaos so I just grabbed you and ran.”

“You patched me up too?” You ask and Tomura nods his head. 

“You should rest some more. No one’s going to hurt you here.”

“I don’t trust you.” You say. Tomura looks hurt by that but more so he looks like he understands, after all this was all sort of new territory. Tomura had no intention of forcing you to do anything, after everything you two had been through he’d be delusional to think you’d up and change how you thought about him in one day. He never thought that could even be possible, that someone could trust him enough to love him. That someone could look at him, perceive him and know him to his very core and choose to stay. He’d stay for you. But he didn’t expect you to stay for him. 

“That’s okay. Are you hungry?” He asks softly. Your eyes meet again. This time tension builds properly and you're reminded how he kissed you. How he grabbed you like a starving man and slamming his lips against your own as though he’d rather do that than breathe. You blush at the thought.

“I need to go. I need to tell my team I’m alive.” You say.

“Stay. Just this one night. I’ll even leave. Just stay, eat something, rest and leave in the morning.” Tomura says, almost like a plea. You swallow, something in his tone had your stomach twisting. You were in trouble. Deep trouble. 

“I… I can’t stay.” You shake your head, dropping the cover and reaching for your clothes but Tomura catches your wrist. His grip is gentle and he’s stepped much closer to you.

“Don’t go.” He pleaded. You couldn’t even speak, not with him this close. You're not sure where your composure had gone but you sorely missed it at this moment. “Just one night-” You cut off his sentence, pressing your lips to his. He got to surprise you once, now it was your turn.  

A curiosity burned inside you, a need to feel the way you felt when he kissed you that first time. Tomura melted at your touch, he groaned against your lips and stepped fully into your space, gently walking you back against the cabin door. A heat burned in the pit of your stomach, only his touch satiated it. Your body ached from the earlier fight, scar and bruises stinging with every movement. But you didn’t care. You dragged Tomura to the bed and pulled him down on top of you. You kissed him hard, kissed him with a need to understand him. To crack him open and live inside. He pulled back just slightly.

“Do you really want this-” You grabbed his shirt and showed him exactly what you wanted. All those sleepless nights, thinking of him. You could solve all the mysteries now. You wanted him horribly bad. Clothes were shed, breaths shared. Tomura was careful with you because of your injuries and although you didn’t exactly want that it was nice not being in complete pain during all this ecstasy. Tomura kissed everything he could, he mapped you out. Wanting to carve the sight of you beneath him into his own skin. To remember this night for years to come. He didn’t expect this lapse of judgment to be a recurring thing. He fully expected you to come to your senses and be gone in the morning. The vicious cycle back in effect. But he wouldn’t fight you any longer. If you wanted to win all you needed to do was ask. Tomura kissed his way back up to your mouth. Your eager touches almost sent him over the edge. Tomura wanted to take things slow but it felt achingly slow, he was just as eager as you. He wanted to see the reactions on your face when he touched you there, wanted to catalog every sound, every noise that escaped your pink lips. He wanted to be rough, it was in his nature but he just couldn’t, he just wanted to kiss you, you were very dear to him. To be close to you. He wanted the soft touches, but above all he wanted the reassurance, even if he knew he could never have it. You could feel it, so you flipped around and pressed him into the covers. He gasped beneath you. If this was anything like your fights you’d come out on top. You leaned and kissed his lips, you trailed kisses to his neck and savored his labored breaths and small whimpers. You barely moved your hips against his, just to amp up the tension. You wanted so badly for years to hold a win over his head, to conquer him but you never thought it would be in such a different context. You tangled a hand in his hair and left marks on his neck. He twitched beneath you, his gentle grip on your hips slowly tightening. You could tell he was holding back. Maybe because you were so injured.You had realized you had been moving sort of fast, consumed by the moment. So consumed that when your hurt arm hit the bed it sent a sobering pain through you like nothing before. Tomura sat up, gently helping your arm back into the sling, careful hands brushing your hair from your face.

“We should stop… I don’t want you injuring that arm anymore.” He says softly as you nod in agreement. He rises from the bed and disappears into the kitchen for a moment before coming back with some food and medicine. As he watched you eat he thought about what he wanted. He wanted you to be the one to stay. To break his curse and change the prophecy. He’d beg and plead if he needed to. Pray to anything above that would hear his desperate pleas. He just wanted you to stay.

“This is good.” You said. “Didn’t know you knew how to cook.” You say, realizing you really don’t know much about Tomura on a personal level. And that you did want to know him. 

“I’m glad you like it.” He says, but it was clear his mind was somewhere else. He watched you with this sort of wanting expression.

“Have you eaten?” You ask and when you look up he leans just slightly to press a soft kiss to your lips. Your breath hitches as he presses his forehead to yours. 

“Will you stay?” He whispers to you. You nod your head and his hands slide against your cheeks as he deepens the kiss, hand tangling in your hair as he drinks you in. How could you not stay?  

[zynart]

Did Drake confide in Kendrick when on tour together (11 years 9 months ago as of Feb 2024) that someone told him she was pregnant?

Ok, so I feel very convinced by this theory and think it's what everything is pointing to. I think it's plausible both timeline-wise and psychologically. And I actually think it's the likeliest option and that people can find more evidence of this if they dig for proof a bit more. If anyone has evidence and can put the pieces together, we'll see over the months to come. Maybe people will find proof in the reblogs?

So: Kendrick spent 4 months touring with Drake from Feb-Jun 2012. How much time passed since Jun 2012 up to the release of Meet the Grahams? 11 years and 11 months. As in, an 11 year old girl who was conceived while they were on tour together would have had her 11th birthday just 2-3 months before Meet the Grahams was released. And as for nobody having yet found an actual daughter: my theory is that Drake found out he'd gotten some girl pregnant while they were on tour, and had her get an abortion because it would've affected his career and lifestyle at the time.

At the time, he would have probably felt some conflict about it because Drake does say in early-career interviews that he was excited to be a dad someday and be present in his kid's life. Back then, like most 25-year-olds do, he would've imagined being 30 or so as being in the far distance and imagined having a family and settling down around then. This was also back before he became this fully cynical misogynistic bachelor version of himself, back when he still sang about heartbreak and I think back then he still believed in love and he even described Rihanna as the love of his life up to 2016 so he probably imagined settling down and having kids eventually.

But like most 25-year-olds, he would've felt like it was too early and like he wanted to spend a few more years having fun and felt that it might both affect his career to have to devote time to being a dad, as well as his image of the sensitive rapper, so he asked her for an abortion. At the time, with it being a decision that would've weighed on him and with Kendrick being someone he spent so much time around at the time - someone that Drake would've seen as relatively mature and spiritual with a long-term relationship and faith, but who wasn't one of his oldest friends that he might have felt awkward or ashamed to talk about it to - out of the people who were around at the time, it was probably Kendrick that Drake would've confided in about this.

I think it's likely that Kendrick would've been supportive of him as a confidant, but that it would also have clarified for him that Drake partying and womanizing with the trappings of fame (as discussed in Buried Alive Interlude) wasn't what he wanted for himself. They were still cool after the tour, it was the Control verse aftermath that started the friction. Of course it was Drake's continued lifestyle descending into misogynistic Dorian Gray style debauchery, as well as him descending from caring about hiphop and having an original voice to becoming full-on culture vulture that phoned in albums.

From the Buried Alive Interlude and Kendrick's views in general, we know he would see all this as being something like Drake having fully sold his soul to the money and power and sex and hedonism that comes with fame. And he would see the continued Peter Pan syndrome, not growing up, possible dalliances with younger women, etc as Drake becoming soulless and numbed and chasing increasingly hardcore things to fill a void. That the Drake he once knew who was still a romantic and dreamed of being a good dad for his kids and so on had become a deadbeat who spent his life partying as some spiritual decay.

I think the fact that Kendrick sees current Drake as someone who wouldn't feel conflicted about asking for an abortion and might not even bother asking himself instead of just having his bodyguards or entourage follow up on every girl he fucks after the fact to ensure she's taken her Plan B or got an abortion if needed, that he's gone from it being a decision that would weigh on him to a decision he'd not give a second thought, as an example of Drake having somehow lost his soul so to speak.

So in that verse, he's reminding Drake of the timeline where he didn't have that kid aborted and was present in her life and never "lost his soul", saying that what the life path he chose instead has been living inside his songs and numbing himself through drugs and women with no wife (Rihanna or otherwise) and not even passion or purpose in his art anymore.

That in another life, Drake could've found fulfilment and love and purpose over his late 20s and his 30s, had to mature by being a dad, could've been making music reflecting that maturity and growth, might have avoided the ghostwriter allegations by never getting in Meek Mill beef, might have avoided the young women allegations by being a family man who didn't have to fill his void by chasing either validation by dating young or by taboos, might even have remained close friends with Kendrick over the years.

Drake's IG response saying he has no daughter missing that point with the metaphors not reaching him just further proved that he's so far gone he doesn't even think about that 2012 decision anymore. That even when Kendrick tried to get him to reflect, all he did was take it literally, do a mental check to be sure nobody that year had a kid through him and then laughed it off, he didn't remember the feeling of conflict and reflect on whether that was a sliding door moment where he went wrong,

(It may also not be an abortion and it might just be that the label paid her off and covered it up had her get the most ironclad NDA imaginable because he was a rising star and the label would've seen him as their biggest asset. With someone that sleeps around as much as Drake, it's statistically inevitable that he hasn't had at least some pregnancy scares - later in his career we know he's gotten more paranoid about it like with the admittedly unproven story about him putting chili sauce in used condoms to ensure nobody could get pregnant.

I think it's statistically likely that he has some unclaimed kids somewhere out there even if this isn't one, kind of in a Drake Equation way - pun intended - for how the Fermi Paradox comes from how even small possibilities multipled by a huge number of possible stars makes alien life almost certain, even small possibility of a pregnancy multiplied by a huge amount of women makes some kids almost certain. The CLB album art is even several pregnant women, etc. But I think it having been him getting some girl he impregnated to either abort the kid or disappear makes more sense and is very plausible without getting into overly dark or conspiracy territory)

UPDATE:

From the supposed texts of Drake and Sophie when she told him she was pregnant in 2017:

“Drake: I want you to have an abortion. Brussaux: I can't kill my baby simply to indulge you sorry. Drake: Indulge me? Fuck you. Brussaux: What? Drake: You do know what you're doing you think you're going to get money.”

Drake's reps initially denying the story said "She's one of many women claiming he got them pregnant".

This isn't any evidence of course. But the biggest thing still for me is that Drake and Kendrick were on tour together over 11 years and 9 months prior to when a kid could have their 11th birthday party not long before Meet the Grahams was released, not a coincidence

[callunavulgari]

“All the people living in, living in the world today Reunited by our love, reunited by our pain All the things that I've done and I've seen Still, I don't know, don't know what it means”

Heather’s Top 50 Songs of 2022

we don’t talk about bruno — encanto cast // behind the mask — ivy & gold // siren song — julian moon // storm song — phildel // my love — florence & the machine // a man without love — engelbert humperdinck // abcdefu — gayle // bones — imagine dragons // without you — ursine vulpine // start a riot — beginners // rule #1 magic — fish in a birdcage // drowning — radio company // to be human — marina // what will you leave behind — max ll // persephone in the garden — aidoneus // in the beginning — fahrenhaidt // all of you — encanto cast // love, maybe — melomance // in the flood — oleksa lozowchuk // the foundations of decay — my chemical romance // king — florence & the machine // dirty little animals — bones uk // burn — 2wei // running up that hill — kate bush // separate ways — journey // what could have been — sting, ray chen // back to the end — stars // gutt ch paranda — preet sandhu // dream — krutikov music // this is a life — son lux // free fall — slot machine // west coast — onerepublic // take control — old gods of asgard // sharks — imagine dragons // hadippa — pritam // around the world — a touch of class // pink venom — black pink //  teenage dirtbag — wheatus // i’m good (blue) — david guetta // talking to yourself — carly rae jepson // 我还记得那天  — shen yicheng // voidfish — rachel rose mitchell // glue — fickle friends // it’s alright — mother mother // wind blow — bone thugs-n-harmony // 回到山沟沟  — DJ何鹏版 // insane — black gryph0n // bloody mary — lady gaga // enter hallownest — christopher larkin // unholy — sam smith

short version | long version | spotify wrapped

short version is the link to what you see here, my helpfully abridged version. long version will lead you to the 265 song, 16 hour and 26 minute supercut playlist which i’ve been slowly cultivating since early january. spotify wrapped will lead you to a mixture of the long and the short version, which is honestly pretty accurate but does not helpfully represent my ear worms of the week.

under the cut is me ranting about music, like usual. enjoy!

i. we don’t talk about bruno || encanto cast seven-foot frame, rats along his back when he calls your name it all fades to black

I am so sorry, but this song had absolutely no reason to go as hard as it did. But it did, so we got the earworm that dogged my heels for about seventy percent of this year. No regrets, seriously, it’s a freaking banger. Also, all of the Tiktoks that were surfacing after Encanto was released made my absolute month. ii. behind the mask || ivy & gold holding on not letting go how can i feel alive again? in this darkness on my own.

I think that I originally found this one on one of my discover weekly playlists and it survived multiple prunings of my abridged playlist through the year, so it got to stay.  iii. siren song || julian moon 'cause i'm the granddaughter of a witch you never burned she taught me things that got me kicked out of church

Tiktok or Discover Weekly? Forever a mystery, but I LOVE this song so much. Has all the redhead energy, iv. storm song || phildel oh, despite the distance, you will see my footprints i will raise my flagpole, i will turn these tables 'round Another discover weekly find. Very much sirens and sailors vibes.  v. my love || florence & the machine there is nothing to describe except the moon still bright against the worrying sky i pray the trees will get their leaves soon Thing number 1: new Florence singles! Thing number 2: new Florence album! Thing number 3: guys, I got to see her in concert in September and she was fucking magical. The sheer amount of fey energy surrounding her was insane. She did the entire concert with her feet bare, hair messy, and she was so fucking resplendent. vi. a man without love || engelbert humperdinck every day I start out, then I cry my heart out lonely is a man without love

I had this song stuck in my head for AT LEAST a month after I finished Moonlight. It’s such a freaking earworm. Also! Good fanvids! vii. abcdefu || gayle A-B-C-D-E, F-U and your mom and your sister and your job and your broke-ass car and that shit you call art fuck you and your friends that i'll never see again everybody but your dog, you can all fuck off

I heard this for the first time with a bellyful of whiskey on the porch of my favorite irish bar on a very, very cold March night. The heat lamps sort of helped but mostly I was cold and buzzed and having very intense conversations about fucking astrology with some of my friends. I literally whipped my phone out to Shazam this mid-conversation. viii. bones || imagine dragons I-I-I got this feeling, yeah, you know where i’m losing all control 'cause there's magic in my bones Technically the first Imagine Dragons song that I fell in love with in 2022 was Enemy, however, I did manage to love this one (and one later down the list) MORE, so this one made it onto the abridged version and Enemy (sadly) did not. Also, here’s an Arcane fanvid! It’s REALY good. And while we’re at it, here’s a Marvel one too! Also really good! Music with good fanvids tend to stick to me like glue. ix. without you || ursine vulpine 'cause I don't want the world to turn without you and I don't want the sun to burn without you

I was so SO sure that I’d first heard this one from a fanvid, but I cannot for my life find it anywhere. Anyway, it’s a really beautiful song and SHOULD probably be in a fanvid if it isn’t already. x. start a riot || beginners arms to the sky screaming rah rah rah head to the side with a nah nah nod hit that switch make it hotter

Initially found the song on this multi-female fanvid back in April, and it really stuck with me. It’s got such great energy. xi. rule #1 magic || fish in a birdcage there is magic in this room i don't know if you can see it it's called love

I flew down to Florida in April and for some reason got the urge to write a drarry fic when I had ABSOLUTELY no way to write it. This song, for some reason, was the instigator. Anyway, I ended up writing it on my phone and posting it when I got back. xii. drowning || radio company hold the day make it through and fall into the light

A coworker of mine ended up finding out that Jensen Ackles of Supernatural had a band and then proceeded to listen to this song (and several others from the album) for I think a month? Two months? It did start getting bleak, but now that I’ve had time and distance, I do really enjoy this particular song. xiii. to be human || marina to be human, i want direction i wanna feel human again Marina! My one true love! This song is just? Beautiful. Haunting. Thought-provoking? It really, really leans hard into the nature of humanity and has made me cry on more than one occasion.  xiv. what will you leave behind || max ll under guiding starlit sky we will learn how to say goodbye

Speaking of crying - I played Spiritfarer this year. If you are unfamiliar, it is a breathtaking little indie game where you are a little girl who is also the grim reaper and you take care of spirits until they’re ready and then escort them to the afterlife. This game GUTTED me. It deals with a lot of hard subjects, the least of which is all the stages of grief. If you haven’t played it, trust me, play it. Be ready for a good cry though. xv. persephone in the garden || aidoneus did we lie in the soil with our arms and legs tangled up like the weeds and the branches of the trees that bound our souls and necks to the ground below?

I think this was another discover weekly, but god, it was a good one. I think the title speaks for itself concerning the subject material, but I was fresh out of my millionth playthrough of Hades and fell in love. xvi. in the beginning || fahrenhaidt and in the beginning when land touched the sea the earth was created around you and me Another discover weekly. The melody in this one is just *chefs kiss* xvii. all of you || encanto cast i may not be as strong but i'm getting wiser yeah, i need sunlight and fertilizer come on, let's plant something new and watch it fly

This song makes me weep every single time I listen to it. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since I heard it the first time. Doesn’t matter what kind of mood I’m in. It hits three distinct parts, first when the rest of the town comes to help them, then when Mirabel’s mother and father are talking about how far she’s come, then when they give her that doorknob. Just. Fuck. Guys, this movie hit me in all of the emotions. xviii. love, maybe || melomance 너의 즐거워하는 모습을 보고 있으면 자연스레 따라 웃고 있는 걸

I watched A Business Proposal on Netflix despite the fact that second-hand embarrassment makes me cringe so hard it hurts. Despite some rather significant moments where I had to pause it for several minutes and regroup, I actually REALLY liked it. It was very sweet, barring some little iffy moments here and there. The main characters had great chemistry. Also I would die for Young-seo. xix. in the flood || oleksa lozowchuk if i falter, if i fall the wave inside my soul carries all i know who can take my hand in the flood?

I played Horizon: Forbidden West in the late spring/early summer and it was everything I hoped it would be. Every corner of the world that you touch, all the side quests and stories. God, and the Vegas area? I really hope the third game is as good as the first two. Also! It does the thing! A himbo, a mean bisexual, and even meaner lesbian, he/theys and she/theys, a token straight that’s on thin ice, an astrology bitch who has everyone’s birth chart memorized, and a short king. If you’ve played the game, I’ll bet you already know which characters match what. xx. the foundations of decay || my chemical romance now, if your convictions were a passing phase may your ashes feed the river in the morning rays Can we talk about the religious experience that I had laying in my bed with the lights off and my headphones in the day that this song came out? I think I played it through four or five times before I took a break because I was crying. Yes, I am that MCR girl. No, I will not apologize. xxi. king || florence & the machine i need my golden crown of sorrow my bloody sword to swing my empty halls to echo with grand self-mythology Have I mentioned that I got to see her live? Have I mentioned that I cried? Did I talk about how she danced barefoot (yes) and spun and spun until she was dizzy (no). Did I talk about the tender moment that the cameras caught where she stroked some poor girl’s cheek and the entire audience got a first row seat to the naked adoration and longing in that girl’s face? How it was the closest I’ve come to witnessing someone come face to face with their god? How she walked, straight-backed and regal, the first time she said the words, “I am king”? No? Fuck, it was an experience, guys. xxii. dirty little animals || bones uk it makes your blood run hot it makes your spit taste sweet it makes you feel more alive than you have ever been

This is the second year in a row that this song has made it to my top 50. It’s one of the songs on the Arcane soundtrack and has basically been my go-to drive fast music since last December. Since I now have to commute to and from Newark two days a week and 161 is basically a long stretch of nothing, I’ve uh, had a lot of time to listen to it. xxiii. burn || 2wei i will not surrender i never learned to lose a fight

Definitely thought this one was a fanvid too, but I can’t find it. Anyway, it’s a great sexy little song. xxiv. running up that hill || kate bush oh, come on, angel. come on, come on, darling let's exchange the experience, ooh

Would you look at that, we’ve reached the point in the playlist where the new season of Stranger Things dropped. I have always loved this song, but holy shit, that scene was freaking amazing.  xxv. separate ways || journey someday love will find you true love won't desert you

Okay, but this song was in the Stranger Things 4 trailer and it was such a masterful trailer that I ended up listening to this song over and over again. I mean, it’s a great song anyway, but damn. That trailer! For all the issues I have with Stranger Things, it’s still such solid television. xxvi. what could have been || sting, ray chen i want you to hurt like you hurt me today and i want you to lose like I lose when I play what could have been Am I still talking about the Arcane soundtrack? Why yes, I am. This track has been living on my “got the morbs” playlist and is generally just a great song to turn to if I want to write or feel angsty things. The violin!  xxvii. back to the end || stars and nothing i say can make you feel less alone again and no song i sing will ever help us go home again 

Not only was I blessed with new Florence and new MCR this year - but I was also graced with new Stars! This song is very, very clearly pulling from the covid experience and it does really nail that strange loneliness of that first year, how the loneliness just kind of slipped into our bones and never left.  xxviii. gutt ch paranda || preet sandhu sambh lai jawani kurhe, kahton firre gaali ni, chamm saade nikhre aa, kamm haddo kaale ni Fanvid! This song SLAPS. xxix. dream || krutikov music dream, dream, dream dream, dream, dream

I honestly cannot figure out this song’s relation to Doctor Strange. Was it in the movie? Did I miss it? Trailer? IDK. But I really love it, and it helps that it made a come back about a month later when The Sandman dropped. xxx. this is a life || son lux this is a life this is our life

If you have not taken the plunge yet and watched Everything Everywhere All At Once, please do. I don’t have the words for how I came out of it knowing it was the most important movie I’ve ever watched, how it understands the nature of humans, how it made me laugh until I was sick and then sob into my fist moments later. This movie understands humans better than anything I have EVER seen and is an actual masterpiece. xxxi. free fall || slot machine if the world is falling apart it'll never take what's in our heart, make it last

I watched Kinnporsche! Well, most of it. I did not actually watch the last few episodes because I forgot where I was and haven’t gone back to it yet. But! It’s an incredibly sexy drama and just generally good tv. There is a concerning moment in one of the first episodes where there is some dubious/non-consent and I feel like most people just? Gloss over how weird it was? But if you’re able to get past that, the rest is smooth sailing. xxxii. west coast — onerepublic give me the sun for just a year i’ll kiss the sky and disappear This song is just obscenely catchy. Also, yes, I am dreaming about the west coast. Please dear god, I know I willingly moved here and all, but please get me out of Ohio. I want Washington. I want Oregon. I want northern California. xxxiii. take control || old gods of asgard and so i'm drawn ever deeper in the oldest house and all these empty rooms this vacant, spellbound mystery motel where i'm the keeper, where i set the rules This is the song that plays during the absolute coolest part of Control. It is one of the coolest experiences I’ve ever experienced in a video game and one of the best incorporations of music into a fight scene since they played Waltz of Flowers in Bioshock. I am linking a video of the gameplay, but honestly, if you get the chance I recommend skipping the video so you don’t ruin it and go play the game. The video is fine, but really doesn’t do the experience justice. xxxiv. sharks || imagine dragons so let it go, let it go that's the way that it goes

This might actually be my favorite song that Imagine Dragons has ever dropped. That’s.. that’s it. That’s the story. Have a fanvid! xxxv. hadippa || pritam Fikar Hi Gham Ka Papa Hai Apna To Bas Yeh Jaapa Hai Fikar Karein Fukarey

I honestly have no idea where I found this one, but it is so incredibly catchy. I know that it was around the time I was shazaming basically every single song they played on Ms Marvel, but honestly I’m just not sure. It is a really good song though. xxxvi. around the world || a touch of class just la la la la la, it goes around the world just la la la la la, it's all around the world

I have no idea about this one either. I feel like I may have gotten it stuck in my head when I was making the wedding playlist? Or it could have been a Tiktok, but I think the playlist is more likely. Great song! Been an earworm for months now. xxxvii. pink venom || black pink 자, 오늘 밤이야, 난 독을 품은 꽃 네 혼을 빼앗은 다음, look what you made us do Fanvid! Also catchy! xxxviii. teenage dirtbag || wheatus  'cause i'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby yeah, i'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby listen to iron maiden, baby, with me, ooh

Hahaha, I did the thing. It does not help that this song will now forever make me think of Eddie/Chrissy. xxxix. i’m good (blue) || david guetta i'm good, yeah, i'm feelin' alright baby, i'ma have the best fuckin' night of my life A secret - I actually think that I like this song more than the original now. It’s a problem. This is also one of my go-to’s on my driving playlist now. xl. talking to yourself || carly rae jepson  so tell me, what you got on your mind? what you got on your mind?

Carly! I also got more Carly this year. xli. 我还记得那天 — shen yicheng 这 世 界 总 会 有 人 欢 笑 有 人 哭 红 眼 在 历 经 过 千 山 万 水 的 Ahhhhh, Love Between Fairy and Devil! It was such a good show! Definitely a fair amount of second hand embarrassment, but over all, it was one of the best things I’ve watched this year. Loved the dynamic between all of the characters. xlii. voidfish || rachel rose mitchell *instrumental*

This was on my top 25 last year and it’s on it again this year because it is just such a beautiful and relaxing song to listen to. I still get shivers when I think about the words “there’s music in a bard’s song.” xliii. glue || fickle friends your cheeks are so warm and mine are glowing too yeah, i can feel our lips like glue

This song came on after Florence left the stage while everyone was trying to get out of the stadium and I basically immediately shazamed it. It’s so poppy and catchy, and basically immediately reminded me of Carly. xliv. it’s alright || mother mother it's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay you're not a monster, just a human

This song. I cannot say “it’s catchy” because I’ve said that about at least ten songs now, but it’s so catchy and just generally makes me feel like it might okay. xlv. wind blow — bone thugs-n-harmony and if, you don't love me now you will never love me again This is such a good freaking mashup! The energy! A friend introduced this to me a couple months ago and I’ve been blaring it in my car ever since. Also shout out to Call Me a Hole which is tragically not on spotify, but IS singlehandedly the best mashup I’ve ever heard. xlvi. 回到山沟沟 || DJ何鹏版 男:翻过山头还是那山头 哎 我的村村就在这山背后 This came across my dashboard and it made me feel good things about being a human. xlvii. insane || black gryph0n haven't been the same since I expired doesn't mean that I plan to retire and now I have the power to bathe all of you in entertaining fire!

I fell into a Tiktok hole! This song got stuck in my head for nearly the entirety of a six hour tattoo session and has been reoccurring ever since. xlviii. bloody mary || lady gaga i'll dance, dance, dance with my hands, hands, hands above my head, head, head

Tiktok hole! Also, Wednesday Addams. This, alas, is my current earworm. xlix. enter hallownest || christopher larkin *instrumental*

We played Hollow Knight! It was fantastic and we still haven’t technically beaten it. The soundtrack has now become my go-to for writing or if I need to calm myself down. Greenpath should also be on here, but I was dumb. l. unholy || sam smith mummy don't know daddy's getting hot at the body shop, doing something unholy

More of the Tik Tok hole. Lots of thirst traps. Actually a relatively sexy song.

[fetznerdeathrecords]

Amiensus - Reclamation Pt. II

Progressive Black Metal from Rochester, Minnesota, U.S.

In 2010, Amiensus was born out of a group of young musicians desiring to bring together their love of black metal and various styles of other music to create something that reflected the decay and beauty represented in different genre’s of music through out history. 2 - the epic conclusion to an ambient opus from US progressive black metal band AMIENSUS (featuring members of Ghost Bath and Chrome Waves). See why No Clean Singing says " Easily the group's best album yet" or Metal Temple declares "This is an early contender for Album of the Year for sure." Limited-edition colored vinyl (300 on white opaque). Includes digital download code and insert.

1. Sólfarið 05:05 2. Acquiescence 08:49 3. Disconsolate 02:45 4. Decaying God Child 05:13 5. The Distance 06:19 6. Leprosarium 05:21 7. Orb of Vanishing Light 04:55

Release date: August 30th, 2024 via @mtheoryaudio

[glenrocklibraryteens]

Album Review: Unreal Unearth by Hozier

If you are looking for an album containing endless depth and hard-hitting lyrics, look no further than Unreal Unearth by Hozier. In this album, Andrew Hozier-Byrne takes inspiration from Dante’s Inferno. Inferno is the first part of Dante Alighieri’s Divine Comedy, and describes the journey of a poet, Virgil, through the Nine Circles of Hell. Each layer represents a sin, progressively worsening as you go through them until you reach the realm where Satan resides. Hozier bases his album on this idea of the Afterlife and the Christian religion itself. I think that Hozier’s relationship and perspective is the aspect of the album that drives it to be so enrapturing. In an interview with Brittany Broski at Austin City Limits (which I definitely recommend watching if you want to hear his own phrasings of the topic) , he recognizes that he has a spiritual identity within himself, but wants to recognize the religion without the secular idolization that he feels is promoted in some churches.

My personal favorites include Francesca, I, Carrion (Icarian), Abstract (Psychopomp), and Unknown/Nth. The entire album’s lyricism and chosen words mimic that of a storyteller, which wonderfully sells the point of some songs directly representing a layer in Hell. Francesca, the fourth track of the album, represents the sin of lust. The song describes a difficult relationship but also one that is worth going back to. Here’s an excerpt of the lyrics:

It was too soon

When that part of you was ripped away

A grip taking hold

Like a cancer that grows

Each piece of your body that it takes

Though I know my heart would break

I'll tell them put me back in it

The overwhelming urge to return to the described relationship is what really stands out to me. Just as he begins to describe the decadence of the connection, he returns to a chorus where he begs to be put back into the ruthless cycle. This circles back to the overarching idea of Inferno; he knows that he is lost in this cloud of lust, but he doesn’t let the pain torment him. Instead, he gives into the depth of his emotions. I, Carrion (Icarian) is almost like the eye of the storm, a calmer and gentle counterpart to Francesca. In this track, Hozier expresses the weightless feeling of being in love. The soft guitar and implementation of other string instruments, the song itself is light and dreamy. The title of the song references Icarus, the boy who flew too close to the sun. The song’s almost naivety is hidden in the lyrics:

If the wind turns, if I hit a squall

Allow the ground to find its brutal way to me

If I should fall, on that day

I only pray, don't fall away from me

The clever play of words in the title (I, Carrion = Icarian) describes the brutality of what Hozier describes. His weighlessness leads him to possible death, which connects to the word “carrion” (defined as decaying flesh of animals). As he readily accepts his fate, he only hopes to stay with his loved one.

The 14th track, Abstract (Psychopomp) is a phenomenal story of compassion and acceptance. Hozier revealed that the song was based on a personal experience when he saw someone run into the middle of the road to help an injured animal to safety. What really sticks out to me is that the experience itself is so common and he took time to expand the emotions behind it.

The speed that you moved

The screech of the cars

The creature still moving

That slowed in your arms

The fear in its eyes

Gone out in an instant

Your tear caught the light

The Earth from a distance

The situation is so imaginable that you can’t help but feel that same grief. The balance between love and fear that is emitted from the situation also reflects onto life itself. The animal in the road, quietly suffering until the release of death, is said to represent the complexity of human emotions. What I love about Hozier’s lyricism is the ability to interpret it in more than one way. That expression of emotion really adds to the song and creates that depth that drew me to this album.

As you reach the end of the album, you are faced with the 15th track: Unknown/Nth. I especially love this song because the change in dynamics towards the end of the song, creating this overwhelming burst of pent-up emotions. This song would represent the ninth circle of Hell, treachery. The track describes a misunderstood partner in a relationship. This partner feels a distance growing and a slow bitterness towards the idea of being “unknown”. Hozier describes the ignorance of the toxicity emitting from the relationship and the idolization of the other partner.

Do you know, I could break beneath the weight

Of the goodness, love, I still carry for you

That I'd walk so far just to take

The injury of finally knowing you

It ain't the being alone

(Sha la la)

It ain't the empty home, baby

(Sha la la)

You know I'm good on my own

(Sha la la)

Sha la la, baby

You know, it's more the being unknown

And there are some people, love, who are better unknown

I think that up until that change in dynamic and volume, the piece holds this begrudging civility that gives an edge to the tempo and vibe of the song. As soon as that politeness fades, there’s a real sense of resentment for what the person has been through. I also think that there’s a mocking tone in the “sha la la”s that sort of echo throughout the song because it seems misplaced and almost mocking to have in a song of this context. The “sha la la”s remind of old Doo-wop love songs, which greatly contrasts the mood of this track.

[lavienbleuuu]

In an attempt to give a true phenomenon which has too-wide leitmotifs loaded with young Indonesian superstars, Hindia flounders to sustain his creative direction.

Having garnered significant acclaim from the success of his politically-minded band .feast, Baskara Putra formed a laughing-but-dying-inside quintet on Lomba Sihir in late 2020. However, an inner realm of personal and creative introspection awakened Baskara to channel his most personal and digestible materials in Hindia’s debut solo album Menari Dengan Bayangan — a record resonating with the stream of individuation material. Listeners adorn Baskara Putra because he is the epitomizer of the current critical generation pulverising everything: a bouquet of multi-genres, unequivocal confessions, state-of-the-art concepts, and lucid wording.

Anyhow, Baskara just unveiled his second studio album Lagipula Hidup Akan Berakhir — a record depicting his preoccupation with whether or not a life has meaning after reckoning the inevitable decay of civilisation leading him to interrogate every last thing he’s seen or known. The opulent opening track, “Malaikat Berputar di Atas Pencakar Langit,” sets the tone with its grandiose lavish string-oriented composition, a cinematic and melancholic ambience ranging from heart-shattering to suspenseful.

The string instalment is solely one of the improved embellishments from his debut. Lagipula Hidup Akan Berakhir showcases distanced material, diverse musicality, ameliorated vocal delivery, and a plethora of collaborators, creating a survival-of-the-fittest experience for audiences with its colossal 115-minute runtime. Dozens of state-of-the-art Indonesian artists are involved in tailoring each track. Gamaliel Tapiheru directs Baskara’s enriched vocal performance, Kareem Soenharjo saves the production from being mediocre, Kamga Mo orchestrates the ethereal choir, Vega Antares levels up a progressive folk in “Bunuh Idolamu”, Audi Adrianto induces multi-faceted guitar work, and many spoken words from Baskara’s closest companies.

The most strikingly stimulating deviation from Baskara’s debut album is the instalment of four lengthy spoken words, spanning a total of 27 minutes, featuring dialogues between the sonically chameleon duo Kristo Immanuel and Iyas Lawrence. The discussions are themed “WAWANCARA LIAR” or “UNFILTERED INTERVIEW” fitting for LPDP — the most favoured scholarship program provided by the Indonesian government — candidates to formulate scholarship proposals in tackling current pressing issues in the country. “WAWANCARA LIAR, PT. I” renders the coalescence of mental health, macro economy, over self-indulgence, and consumptive behaviour denoted by Indonesian youngsters by also addressing (“I don’t know if this is a free country”) portraying the controversial Information and Electronic Transaction Law (UU ITE). To shed a different light, “WAWANCARA LIAR, PT. 4” captures the open secret greenwashing by capitalists amid the soaring global climate crisis. This segment sheds light on the deceptive environmental claims made by profit-driven entities.

Kareem Soenharjo arrays the longest spoken words of the album. Matter Mos spits concealed nepotism, gratification, and power corrupt crafted in “WAWANCARA LIAR, PT. 2,” performing Kristo and Ilyas in unveiling perennial issues of corruption and incompetent staff in the Indonesian government, especially the spreading-like-wildfire Indonesian ID breaches from a plethora of governmental sites, services, and applications suffering from inadequate cybersecurity systems. The most dauntless spoken word is “WAWANCARA LIAR, PT. 3,” which boldly criticises the potential collusion of the 7th Indonesian president in stirring up citizens to elect the next Indonesian president. This part takes listeners to a dystopian cyberpunk world through Kareem’s dynamic fusion of industrial hip-hop, glitch pop, and gabber like Syndicate’s “Slippin’ Into Darkness”.

Despite the addressed macro issues he has no full power to overcome, Baskara still caters to his personal unease — being an existentialist and nihilist. Nihilism is rich in “Janji Palsu” — Baskara’s exploration in layering his vocal — and “Berdansalah, Karir Ini Tak Ada Artinya” that anthemically reiterate (“Kau tahu hidup ini tak ada artinya”). He also addresses how nihilism becomes the main commodification in the early 2020s (“Dijual sesuai berat, dipakai untuk bermain / Semua tak terkecuali hingga nihil direduksi”). Another pivotal topic is his existential crisis as a being in balancing between ephemerally earthy ventures and eternally religious acts is raised (“Melihatnya kau sadar hidup hanya sengsara / Lepas dari penjara fisik, langit bergema / Sekarang namamu diuji kematian kedua”) in “Siapa yang akan Datang ke Pemakamanmu Nanti?” with a hooky stoner riff as in “R U Mine?” by the handful Audi Adrianto.

The second disc nests some tracks broadcasting environmentalism as if Baskara had lamented over DW Documentary’s Environment & Nature YouTube playlist. “Pesisir” offers Baskara’s most authentic rock presentation iced with Kamga’s uncontestably evocative choir assemble exorcising souls neglecting natural ethics (“Kencang kau menertawakan hujan di tengah gurun berapi / Cepat kau menertawakan hewan, di dalam hilang empati”). The visible nightmarish environmental crisis is marked with the thickening air pollution and rising sea water level in Jakarta (“Harapanku menyelam kala langit menghitam / Dan pesisir bergumam, dalam diam mengancam / Harapanku tenggelam, langit tertutup muram”).

Putting Baskara’s personal experiences aside, some narratives of the record are extensive plots of Radiohead’s “Nude” internalised by Baskara to curb his opinions. “Selebrisik”, the busiest, most electrifyingly dynamic, and heavily contributed track, instantly emerges as a standout, preaching the value of speaking with quality (“Lebih baik tutup mulutmu”). The electrifying riff and funkily wobbly Thundercat-esque bass by Rishanda Singgih attune with the soulful flow of Tuantigabelas, while Rubina’s ethereal and elegant vocal layering effortlessly transports listeners to a summery, warm state of mind, perfectly complemented by Kareem and Iga Massardi’s experimental guitars. The addition of Tommy Pratomo’s dystopian sax crescendos the track into a mesmerizing culmination. Also, traces of Bon Iver’s electronic influence manifest in “I’m Not A Robot / CAPTCHA” with its glitchy and electronic spoken words similar to “22 OVER S∞∞N”, while “Forgot Password” shapes a warm and glorious folk leaning heavily on the majestic guitar followed by a glorious bass culminated by Nadin Amizah’s typical soothing-yet-rich-in-vibrato in voicing the toxic cyberculture of Indonesian netizens, globally known for having low digital literacies.

Behind the mentioned plots, the saviour complex is one of the most unsettling them of the record, which pulls Kendrick Lamar’s Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers closer to mind. “Satu Hari Lagi,” “Bunuh Idolamu,” and “Nabi Palsu” detail Kendrick’s “Savior”. Despite its similar record structure and narrative, Lagipula Hidup Akan Berakhir fails to tailor the second disc to purposefully operate at the same level with the first one, making the list only functions solely for the sake of evening the track numbers. Songs after “Alexandra” are the pits of interest and have always been in a must-skip list as if Baskara has run out of ideas to endure the songwriting and bold quality of the last six songs, that sound like left-over tracks of his campaign for Indosat Ooreedoo.

Lagipula Hidup Akan Berakhir is Baskara’s experience of reality. Here, you follow Baskara’s rigorous journey to set a purpose in the duality of the finite and the infinite of life whilst reading Jean-Paul Sartre’s Being and Nothingness. With its well-articulated storytelling, the album is another Baskara’s concept discography although the insistent to even the tracklist in each disc with less thoughtful musicianship dulls the overall journey.

[mylifearchives]

Bringing Old Memories to Life: The Wonders of VHS Conversion Services

In today's fast-paced digital world, technology has become an integral part of our lives, transforming the way we store, share, and cherish memories. Gone are the days of VHS tapes and physical photo albums, replaced by the convenience and accessibility of digital media. However, amidst this digital revolution, many precious memories from the past have been left behind in the analog era. VHS conversion services have emerged as a lifeline, breathing new life into these forgotten moments and preserving them for generations to come.

The Legacy of VHS Tapes

VHS tapes were once the standard medium for capturing and reliving treasured moments, from family gatherings and weddings to childhood memories and milestone celebrations. However, as technology advanced, VHS players became obsolete, and the tapes started to deteriorate over time. Many families found themselves unable to access their cherished memories, trapped in a format that modern devices no longer supported.

The Rise of Digital Conversion Services

Digital conversion services have come to the rescue, offering a transformative solution for salvaging the content of old VHS tapes. These services specialize in converting analog formats, such as VHS, into digital files that can be easily stored, shared, and enjoyed on modern devices. The process involves carefully transferring the content from VHS tapes to digital formats, making it accessible for viewing on computers, smartphones, tablets, and smart TVs.

Preserving Family History

One of the most significant advantages of VHS conversion services is their ability to preserve family history. Many VHS tapes hold priceless moments, capturing the essence of past generations. By digitizing these tapes, families can ensure that their ancestors' stories and memories are passed down to future generations. Whether it's a grandparent's birthday party or a child's first steps, these digitized moments become a timeless treasure that can be shared and cherished for years to come.

Reviving Precious Moments

VHS conversion services breathe new life into old memories by restoring and enhancing the content from deteriorating tapes. Through professional digitization, faded colors, distorted audio, and visual imperfections are corrected, ensuring that the essence of the moment is preserved in its best possible form. The emotional impact of watching restored memories is profound, as individuals can relive their past with clarity and detail.

Ease of Access and Sharing

Digitized memories offer unparalleled convenience in terms of accessibility and sharing. Unlike VHS tapes that require specialized equipment for playback, digital files can be easily viewed on various devices without losing quality. Furthermore, these digital memories can be effortlessly shared with friends and family through email, cloud storage, or social media platforms, connecting loved ones across distances and time.

Safekeeping and Archiving

VHS tapes are susceptible to damage, decay, and loss due to age and mishandling. By converting VHS tapes to digital formats, individuals ensure that their memories are safely preserved for the long term. Digital files can be stored in multiple locations, making them less vulnerable to physical threats such as floods or fires. Moreover, backing up digital memories on external hard drives or cloud storage ensures an additional layer of security against data loss.

My Life Archives: Preserving Your Memories for a Lifetime

In the digital age, memories are an integral part of our identity, and preserving them has never been more crucial. "My Life Archives" offers the best solution for digital conversion services, especially when it comes to VHS tapes and precious photos. With state-of-the-art technology and a team of experts, "My Life Archives" excels at transforming old VHS tapes into high-quality digital files, ensuring that your cherished moments are brought back to life with clarity and vibrancy. Moreover, their photo scanning service meticulously digitizes each photo, making sure that no detail is lost. Embrace the wonders of "My Life Archives" and safeguard your memories for generations to come.

Conclusion

The wonders of VHS conversion services have undoubtedly revolutionized the way we preserve and enjoy old memories. Through digital conversion services, precious moments that were once locked away in outdated formats have been brought back to life, enriching the lives of countless individuals and families. Whether it's for preserving family history, reviving nostalgia, or ensuring safekeeping, the magic of VHS conversion services has ensured that the legacy of these cherished memories lives on, transcending time and technology. So, if you have old VHS tapes gathering dust in your attic, consider embracing the wonders of VHS conversion services to unlock the treasures of your past and embrace a digital future filled with cherished memories.

[tomsmusictaste]

Any love for in her own words around here ?

Hell yeah, I've posted about them a few times, here's the tag

Footprints and Raining In Toronto are hard favourites of mine, and Distance And Decay made my top ten albums for the year it came out! It's good stuff! ^_^

[furiousphilosopherbeliever]

“My Love” in Different Languages - 77 Weird and Wonderful Romantic Names

I mock it but I secretly love it. Love notes don't have to be long to show they care. I care deeply about optics. If you’re pursuing a long-distance relationship, you can arrange an online night of fun. Yeah, I can appreciate a quiet night in. Relationships are not structured and a girl doesn't get mad if her "boyfriend" doesn't call every night. So, today's independent-minded teenage girl faces a conflicting decision, indeed. A crush has such a huge affect on a teenage girl so I think that many of us fear a relationship could stop us from living our life as we want to. You don't want to be skint. You don't want to make someone feel cheesed off. I recently became lone, and I really want to meet a man who can help me overcome this. No problem. Main criteria is having down to earth country values and a desire to meet other like-minded folks.

There's a constant denial of a substance abuse problem or refusal to get help. When your partner says they don’t feel heard, try connecting with their emotion rather than their story to help deepen your connection. Charging a registration fee will help cover your costs - check out other speed dating events in your local area to see what they are charging as this will help you price your tickets. After one half-life has elapsed, one half of the atoms of the nuclide in question will have decayed into a "daughter" nuclide. One variety greatly increases the area above the center, creating what is sometimes called a ladder web that extends eight feet above the spider. נערות ליווי בקריות While most animals spread their sperm in water or insert them into the female, mature male spiders weave a small "sperm" web. Moths are attracted to the smell and fly toward the web until they hit it and stick. Q: Should I wear deodorant or perfume during Smell Dating?

Awkward dating situations are inevitable in an island-bound population of 320,000 in which everyone shares a family tree. No, it is not the suburban family of two kids and a dog that makes a person happy. No, that is so boring! For example, the processes that transport and deposit sediment in a river are the same today as they were a billion years ago. In fact, every single native Icelander has a place on the very same family tree: They're all descendants of Jón Arason, the last Catholic bishop of Iceland, and his wife, Helga Sigurðardóttir. In fact, the silence went on for so long he thought she had to be thinking of the world’s best noun. In fact, in 1963, over 90% of the 3000’s produced actually ended up in the USA. We’ve been helping people find love for over 20 years now. If a British person asks you to budge up they are asking you to move over slightly. However, there are ways of meeting people specifically for Korean dating.

There are four ways: Context, context, context, and cross-dating. Unlike insects, there are no flying spiders--but they can balloon! These spiders can twirl the bolas in the air. I need them like I need air. “New to London, need someone to show me around. If someone tells you that you "know your onions" it means that they think you know what you're talking about. Skiving off means to shirk one's responsibilities or play hooky. They play a big role in controlling insect populations. For example, a family might decide to go on a camping vacation. For example, JJA Worsaae used this law to prove the Three Age System. Swift thanked Alwyn in her acceptance speech after "Folklore" won album of the year at the 2021 Grammy Awards, making her the first woman to win the award three times. World War Three. Yes, I know that hasn't happened yet. Do you know a bloke from a bog roll?

[musicmakesyousmart]

Grisha Shakhnes - Distance and Decay

Organized Music from Thessaloniki

2014

[breaking-justin]

distance or decay by in her own words is the best pop punk album of 2022, easily

[vardasvapors]

my gf and i drove through salt lake city in december and we stopped off at antelope island, a small peninsula state park thing in the salt lake. if you’ve never been in the area at this time/conditions idk how to convey it. uh. so the great salt lake is very large and very salty, and in december at least this means it is shrouded in these long narrow streamers of high-lying clumpy/non-diffuse mist, and also the water level is very low.

on either side of the road-wide strip of peninsula, there’s various sedges and stuff growing out of water that may be anywhere between one millimeter to several feet deep — you can’t tell bc the aforementioned mist conditions and resulting light conditions fuck up every bit of perspective and texture and distance and substance information.

anyway when you’re driving on antelope island in these conditions it literally looks like you’re at the edge of a flat-world in a videogame where the ground coding just trails off into a scattering of small islands and fragments embedded in either the water or the sky, it’s impossible to tell which bc both are made of the exact same shiny grey-blue gleam coding, the only difference is occasionally there’s a patch of water birds on the water’s surface, but you can’t really tell anything beyond that one patch of birds. when they fly over the water you can’t tell how high they are. there is no horizon. when the sun sets bc it’s december it seems to just mysteriously melt in the middle of the afternoon sky.

if you get out to walk on the trails, most of the plants are a pretty unfamiliar to even the general utah region (i think?) bc only the stuff that does well in a very salty landlocked lake in the middle of the desert by a city is there. a lot of things sparkle a little from the salt but not very evenly.

if you go down to the lake edge in december when the water is super low, there are pond-sized tide-pool-y areas of salt-loaded decaying organic matter and thriving algae and bacterial mats just kind of beached amid the sand that are visibly and audibly bubbling in the mist sun like a one-inch-deep heavily-reduced petri dish. colors and textures include (incomplete list): a) eyestrain-intense neon green in tight fuzzy curled strands and loose fluff and matte lobes b) deep reddish orange c) a rich brown that has the exact (i touched it) texture of a flourless chocolate cake baked not quite long enough but with too much baking powder, d) salt so white. further from the lake edge there are occasional buffalo standing around in the grass.

my girlfriend played the album 666 by aphrodite’s child while we drove through and it was the most correct combination i’ve ever experienced.

[randomingoftherandomness]

No 19 Water - WOHDaily’s Summer Event August 2021

A/N: I was listening to Florence and The Machine’s ‘How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful’ album and this imagery struck me with such a visceral longing to have it written. I couldn’t have resisted even if I tried haha... I hope everyone reading this is doing ok 

♡✧( ु•⌄• ) Take it one step at a time. You’re doing great and you’re alright!

Based on this WOHDaily’s Prompt List

--

The scent of rust and decay from the wreck in the distance fills his lungs with iron and salt and the deep summer sunshine. How many days has it been since they were shipwrecked here? How many months? Zishu really doesn’t know. 

And he honestly doesn’t care. 

On this, a lonely spit of land in the middle of the great wide sparkling blue, was their paradise. Here, the weight of expectation weighs on neither one of them. In their little slice of heaven, Zishu can reach out freely to his Lao Wen, kiss him, touch him, hold him, bury himself in him until they were one and the same being.

“Ah Xu, Ah Xu, my precious beauty,” Lao Wen purrs, pressing fingers to his sides, trailing lips up his spine. “What are you thinking abut that could furrow your brow like that, hm?”

Zishu smiles quietly into the crook of his elbow. They’re lying under the shade of the trees; him on his front, while Lao Wen lazily traces down the skin of his back. Behind them is the small dwelling they both built, the patch of edible vegetation they managed to cultivate. By some miracle, the chickens survived the storm. Eggs are a blessed plenty at their table to accompany the fish his Lao Wen skilfully brings home. 

The midday sun is blinding as it dances on the waves. 

“I was thinking that I am happy. I am happy to be here with you,” Zishu says, exhaling softly. “I’ve abandoned the world for my soulmate. How perfect is that?”

A flash of surprise colours the darks of Lao Wen’s eyes before it gentles into a deep fondness that curls something tight and warm in Zishu’s belly.

Gently, Lao Wen slides his bare torso over Zishu’s, blanketing him with his weight and his heat. Nuzzling his nose to the corner of his jaw, Zishu hears the smile in his words. 

“How perfect, indeed.”