#also considering she was looking at bills i'm guessing it's her house but if you would like another location let me know to further mend -

[woman-of-many-fandoms]

Honestly though, it must be so weird to work with some people for a few years of your life and for years, decades, later people are shipping you with your co worker.

I'm obviously all for shipping fictional characters, but this is the actors job. Where they get a paycheck. They are literally being paid to act like found family.

Like imagine you worked in an office with some people for 3 years in 2004-2007 and in 2030 people are making clips of you and how in love you look while eating lunch with Carol or saying hi as you both arrived in the parking lot.

I've seen this in pretty much every fandom I've been in. Star Trek, good omens, X men, Marvel. I do not think RDJ has any emotional attachment to Chris Evens or that Shanter really cared about and enjoyed spending time with Nimoy. I'm positive for David Tennant, Good Omens is just his next job and Michael Sheen only likes it because it made him much more well known in the acting world and it'll be easier to get his next gig. Yes Pine and Quinto look like they are actual friends outside of the movies but that is an exception.

Anyway, just my thoughts since I just saw a post of some Trek actors in I'm assuming the late 80s or 90s and people were saying 'how could he not be bi saying stuff like this'. Money, the answer is always money.

edit: OK let me address some of what is in the comments. Do actors say they are friends, sure, and if you want to take that at face value then you are right, they are friends. I personally don't think it counts if you are being paid to do so. And before anyone says anything, no not directly. But they have a whole 'image' to uphold that their income is tied to.

I don't know much about the entertainment industry and don't know why people would want that life but it's .... well, different, is the nice way to say it. My sister's career is considered part of the entertainment industry though she is behind the scenes. (And, side note, even being behind the scenes I've still found photoshopped images someone made of her in her in sexy lingerie ... )

TBF we don't talk that often but I've heard some stories (apparently Bill Nye is more then a bit of a jerk behind closed doors) She's lived in Hollywood 12 years now and there is the face people put out in the public and who they truly are. Yes, we all have a self that we hide (I'm autistic so I know all about masking) but it seems that is pushed to extremes.

I've seen her act like many people's best friends (house parties and giving favors and gifts that I question) and promoting their good name in public then she'll tell me in private some horrible things that person has done to others and how it's just how it works. She house/cat sat for a guy (and sent me views from his balcony, my god it was nice) who I think a lot of people would recognize from TV but their relationship was built on respect for each other careers.

Sure, you can tell me not to base the examples off my sisters stories and, ok fair. But I'd also want to point out - the part of RDJ buying evens a car, I did some math. He has 300 million net worth according to google. I have a salary, not net worth (or a negative one cause of student loans I guess), but it is the equivalent of me buying my co worker a $32 gift assuming the car was 150k. I met a guy who performed in Vegas shows and told me how they've had dinner with (I honestly don't remember if it was Penn or Teller) at their house with their spouses. And private chats ... doesn't really tell me much.

I'm currently seeing a bunch of clips of the main actors for the new Wicked movie saying how each other changed each others lives and it just comes off as more acting to promote the movie to me.

And even with Pine and Quinto , I only gave that one a pass because they said knew each other and got along before being in Trek and even then, eh..

Again, just how I interpret things. I know friend can mean different things to different people and a lot of what I see I don't interpret as friend, I see it as networking. I would absolutely be 'friends' with someone if it helped me make and maintain my multi millions .

[sxtvrns]

electra heart

🎶 now playing: bubblegum bitch - MARINA

P: Ben Hargreeves x Fem!Reader

S: A kid at the convenience store becomes a friend. That kid soon has you head over heels. You never got the chance to tell him how you felt; even years go by and you still think about him. Yet you wonder if he'll ever wake up.

W: minor tua spoilers, angst, kinda rushed, possible inaccuracy, mentions of violence, death

N: This is in a similar format to my Finney blurb, and this does not follow the canonical storyline due to plot changes. Also, yes, MARINA inspired the name of this blurb because I had an opportunity and I took it. This fic is way too long for its own good.

please interact if you enjoy!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

On the twelfth hour of the first day of October, 1986, forty-three women around the world simultaneously gave birth. None of the women showed any prior signs of pregnancy.

You were one of those kids.

Your mother said she went suddenly into labor in the middle of a date she was on with another guy, with the fact that he thought she was already married and was cheating on her husband. Ever since then, she raised you on her own.

Though your abilities remained dormant until certain situations arose.

2001

The bell of the door rings as you walk to the back of the convenience store, the fridge door hissing as it opens and letting out cool, refreshing air. You brows among the rows and rows of glass bottles staring down at you from their shelves, as if they're eagerly wanting to be picked.

You take a bottle of Crush soda off one of the racks, closing the door and noticing someone standing beside you.

He wore knee high socks, boy shorts, a blazer and some sort of sweater vest underneath with a black tie. "Hi." You greet out of nowhere, certainly catching the boy off guard. He acknowledges you, but hides his face. "You need help reaching something?" You ask, leaning against the glass door. He shakes his head while you respond with a shrug.

He watches you walk away past the shelf where you're out of view, the ding of the cash register and the chime of the door bell meaning you left already.

Every time you went to visit the store, he was there. He was there the next time you went, and the next time, and the next, doing the same thing he does all the time, staring at the soda fridge but not buying anything.

Sure, he could've been a window shopper, but he came back too often for it to be considered so.

The next time you went, you grabbed a drink for your mom, and there he was, staring at the fridge. "Hey." You send him a wave, him only nodding in response. "Um, you... how come you come here all the time but don't buy anything?" You ask. "My dad doesn't allow soda in the house. He doesn't want any of us drinking soda. He says it'll 'disrupt our endurance'." He air quotes.

"So you just come here all the time to stare at soda and torture yourself because you can't have it?" For the first time ever, you see something of a smile. "I just sneak out. My dad would kill me if he found out. I do want to buy something, but... I don't have any cash on me right now." He says, hands reaching into his pockets and pulling them out empty handed.

"I can pay." You offer. His head perks up. "Really?" He looks overly excited for a bottle of soda. Is his dad just super dietary restrictive? "Yeah. This bottle is for my mom anyways, so..." You trail off, gesturing to the fridge to let him pick. He opens the door, the standing there for what seems like ages before picking a bottle.

You toss the dollar bills on the cash register, the cashier handing you change. You give the boy his soda bottle, and he looks reluctant. "Are you gonna drink that?" You ask. "I'll save it for when I'm at home. I'll try to be stealthy about it, though." He looks away for a second, wanting to say something. "Um, thank you." He stutters. "You're welcome. I'm Y/N. You?"

"Ben. Ben Hargreeves." A smile creeps up onto your face at his shy demeanor. "Nice to finally meet you, I guess. I'll see you around." You say, walking away and leaving him alone on the sidewalk.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Ben sneaks back into his room, shutting the window quietly while being careful to have the glass bottle clank against anything and make noise.

"Hey, man." Diego greets, his face dropping. "Where the hell did you get that?" He points to the soda bottle in Ben's hand. "What– oh my god, dad's gonna kill you." Luther's face is the same as his brother's; covered in pure shock.

"I know. But the girl bought it for me, so..." Ben muttered. His brothers faces lit up mischievously. "The girl you run into every time you sneak out?'" Ben nods at Diego's question. "She talked to me. I got her name."

"Okay? So what is it?" Luther's fully invested in this mystery girl. "Y/N." Ben answers. "She's... she's very pretty." He adds, his brothers sending each other a look. "You've seen her a million times and the one time she talks to you... you finally find her pretty." Diego clarifies.

"Maybe because she was closer to me this time? Or she just seemed more open and–"

"Dude, we get it, you like her." Luther says, stopping Ben from rambling. "Okay, so... when's the wedding?" Diego jokes, both of his brothers rolling their eyes. Ben sneers, "You're so annoying."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"I think I finally figured it out. Where I've seen you before." You say abruptly, eating a potato chip. "Where?" He asks, curious. Frequent convenience store stakeouts for him helped grow your relationship, and now you're sitting on a flat apartment rooftop with him, legs hanging over the ledge, staring at the moon. He's been giving you hints as to where he was in the paper after claiming he was 'famous'.

"You're a Hargreeves kid. You were in the bank robbery hostage thing." You specified. "There you go, you got it. Everyone's seen it; I'm surprised it took you so long." He says in his usual calm, gentle tone. The heroic act was published in newspapers for weeks after it happened.

"I know this is like a really sudden and weird question but... did you kill them?" His face drops, now full of the panic that lurked closer and closer to his mind. "What?" He says, trying to keep his cool. "Oh, no, I just... I don't know, I just had a feeling. Um, it's a weird feeling but something's telling me that you killed the robbers. Pricks probably deserved it anyways so it doesn't really matter." You try to brush it off, but notice that your friend looks bashful.

"How did you know?" He asks, voice barely above a whisper. You find yourself at a loss for words, wanting to say something but unable to come up with a reasonable answer. "I don't know." You look at him, face darkened with guilt.

"I've had friends like you. They never become good people, continuously hurting people, even killing people on the street when they go out at the wrong time. They've caused massacres. Something about you is different." You pause, struggling to explain. "You never wanted to kill them, did you?" He shakes his head, looking down at the street below. "I'm sorry for bringing it up. It was a stupid thing to ask."

"No, no, it's fine." He claims, nodding profusely but it isn't enough to convince you. "It certainly isn't fine. No one would ever confess to a murder so easily."

"Please don't bring it up again. I-I never asked to kill them. It's something I can't control when... when I'm in the field." He admits. You simply look down with him, the tips of your fingers grazing his. You don't seem to notice, but he does. Though the air his cold, his face is warm, and he wonders if you're fine with it. He doesn't want to move his hand.

It's almost heartwarming. His mother would hold his hand sometimes yet it didn't feel as comforting as mere fingertips from you to his hand did. You do eventually notice, looking down at your loosely laced hands. You take his hand in yours out of nowhere, Ben's face flushing even more.

"Your hands are warm." You say simply. "Did you do that on purpose?" He asks while you look at him confused. "Do what on purpose?" He points to your intertwined hands, your lips curling into a smile. "Maybe. Do you like it?" You ask for good measure, unsure if he was okay with it in the first place. He nods. "If I didn't, I wouldn't be enjoying this as much as I am right now."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Finding out Ben's abilities was in the most unfortunate of circumstances. He said he had a shortcut to get home, and he said it was down a certain dark alleyway.

Nothing good ever happens in dark alleyways.

You both passed by a group of teens that looked about your age, thinking nothing of it until you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"Give me your wallet."

One of them demanded, turning you around with a knife in their other hand. "I don't have any. Spent it all." You said, trying to hide your nervousness. "Bullshit. Empty your pockets." She said, nudging her head. "I said I don't have anything–" The tip of her knife nearly digs into the underside of your chin with light pressure. "Empty your fucking pockets or I'll kill your boyfriend too." She threatens.

Out of nowhere, a roar erupts from behind you, the knife on your chin being pulled away. You turn to see Ben, tentacles coming out of his stomach out of some sort of void. You run to him but get grabbed by one of the teens, knife nearly impaling you. It's knocked out of their hands and drops to the floor with a clink. Instead of getting stabbed, the person who grabbed you is impaled with a tentacle, blood spraying everywhere.

The other two try to escape, one of them unlucky and suffering the same fate as their ally. The last girl runs off, dropping her knife and running away. You look at Ben whose drenched in blood, tentacles returning to the inside of his stomach and the void closing. He's wiping his face of blood and tears.

"I'm sorry. You never should've seen this." He says, but you hug him rather than his assumption of you running away. "You saved me. And you said those things weren't in your control. You never wanted to kill them. It's not your fault." You try to convince him, easier said than done. He hugs you back, sobbing into your shoulder.

As your route changed from low ground to high to avoid suspicion of the blood on your clothes, a question slips out.

"What was that girl's name? The one who tried to mug me?"

"Jennifer. I overheard them talking whenever I took this high route."

"She's one real bitch." Ben chuckles at your statement.

"Definitely. One real bitch."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

2006

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit–" You push through the mosh of people crowding up to the caution tape surrounding the building. "Ben! Ben, where are you?!" You shoved people aside to get to the front, eyes meeting Luther's who are red from crying. "Luther! Where is he?" He hears you but only shakes his head. Sir Hargreeves stares at you for a second before his attention is focused back on the crowd, the frontline flooded with cameras and reporters.

"Fuck this." You mutter, going under the caution tape and running past the group of crying kids in their uniforms. "Y/N!" You hear Allison cry, but the adrenaline to find your friend is all you can think about right now. Allison looks at her father, who's staring at the entrance you just ran through.

Just as the police push in to go and chase you, he stops them with a shout. They back off and instead guard the entrance so no one else can enter. As much as they are confused, Allison is left relieved and surprised by her father's actions. He never knew about you. He wouldn't help someone who he doesn't have a reason to have pity for, if he had any in that stone cold body of his.

The rooms are dark, only illuminated by skylights in the ceiling. With the little light there is, you find a body laying on the ground, shattered glass around it. You carefully tread towards it, Ben's face aglow in the sun, staring straight up.

"Ben! Oh, Ben, oh my god, you're, you're hurt. How come you aren't– aren't with your siblings? Can you stand, can you see me? How many fingers am I holding up?" He chuckles with a struggle as you help him sit up with his back leaning on the desk. There's blood staining on his white undershirt and it's getting onto his blazer; it's practically everywhere on him. It seeps through the fabric moderately while you try to put pressure on it.

"Y/N... how did you get here? I thought my dad would've..." He winces slightly. His thumb wipes a stray tear you didn't know was resting on your cheek. "I don't know myself. I thought the police would come in after me. I thought I'd be shot dead." Right after the words come out of your mouth, he looks relaxed, tired.

"I think I'm gonna die here." He says so casually with a smile. "What? No, no, Ben, you aren't gonna die– look, the paramedics are on their way! They're coming! You'll be okay!" He shakes his head and looks down at your hands, gripping onto his blazer. "If I'd come out alive, I wouldn't be here. I'd be with my siblings outside for the press."

You're trying to hold back your tears, but fail miserably and start crying while your hands are stained with his blood. "Who did this to you?" You ask through foggy eyes. "Jennifer." He says, the name setting off a spark. "I'm not gonna make it." He groans, sighing with a smile.

"Don't say that. You're gonna be okay."

"I'm sorry, Y/N."

"No, don't apologize–"

"I love you. I always have.

His hand travels up to your face with the last bit of energy he has left in his body, his thumb wiping away another tear.

And it falls.

His arm slowly drops beside you, a small pool of blood on the floor. Your hands move to his shoulders, then to his face, his neck, his arms. "Ben? No, no, no no no..." You cry. He lays limp there against the desk as you scream, sobs spilling out your lips as a sudden energy rushes through you. Your hands rest on him while your head rests on his shoulder, feeling jolts of energy running through your body.

The lights flicker as you hear slow clapping from across the room. There's a figure standing in the dark hallway with a smirk and blood splattered on their face. "I did quite enjoy the show. Did you enjoy my hard work?" She smiles, arms crossed while you slowly stand up, giving her a death stare. The fire in you grows the longer that stupid smirk stays on her face.

"How many of them did you kill?" You ask, the lights flickering. "All of them. Except for his brothers and sisters who fled like mice." She takes a step forward, hand reaching out to the side as if she's reaching for something. "And you... you and your stupid boyfriend killed the last of my gang." Suddenly, a pillar crashes through the wall and flies at you, but you feel nothing on impact. It shatters into pieces that fall onto the ground, decorating the floor with its shared glass.

The lights haven't stopped flickering as a glow rushes through your veins, every projectile thrown at you being destroyed with the touch of your hand. There's panic on her face as you step closer with every object you manage to avoid, and ironically enough, she runs away. Flees like the Hargreeves she made fun of.

But she killed your friend. Your best friend. It was appropriate to not show mercy when she took something that mattered so much to you.

She definitely seemed like a raging narcissist, so what's better than taking away the thought of her being better than everybody else. In fact, why not take away the thought of her thinking at all?

A bolt of lighting emits from your hand, and reaches her, shocking her and causing her to lay limp on the floor. Your hand, glowing white and blue, grabs her by the neck with force and lifts her up in the air. Her airway is cut off, squirming as she does anything she can to breathe. All you do is stare at her, watching her struggle and suffer in your grasp, the fire in you now at its biggest; you can feel it rushing through every bone in your body.

You squeeze her neck, the veins in it flashing a bright white before her face freezes and her head hangs low. You let go of her, her body dropping to the floor with a thump.

She's dead. You killed her.

The lights stop flickering. Ben's body is still left by the desk unaffected somehow, but littered with dust from the pillars that were thrown at you. You kneel down in front of him, his blood staining your clothes being the last thing on your mind. Your hands rest on his chest, gentle jolts moving from your hands and to his chest. Tears flow from your eyes but not even a sob tumbles out of your lips.

Footsteps come from the other halls. You turn your head, panicked, wanting to escape but not leave Ben behind.

You'll see him in the hospital if he's still alive.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"Good evening, Ben. How are you feeling?"

"Mom?"

"Your father just passed away."

"What?"

"Do you need anything?"

"Where is everyone? Where are my siblings? Where is... where is Y/N?"

"I don't know where your siblings are, but I could ask Pogo where Y/N is."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

2019

The Hargreeves eventually parted ways, while Ben's body remained comatose in the ward of their house. You visited every day, whenever you had time. Sir Hargreeves saw you at the hospital watching over Ben, and took you in for training. For 17 year old you recovering from grief, it was hard. It hurt like hell. Everything hurt.

Sir Hargreeves explained that your time, date of birth, and sudden labor from your mother had developed those electricity-related abilities that you were able to control. You forced yourself to think that it all made sense, when really, it didn't. Kind of like how Ben's abilities made him able to summon creatures from another dimension through his body. That certainly didn't make sense.

To find out Ben was comatose relieved you. They said his heart rate had already been reset with no need for the defibrillators. But he was alive, only unconscious. Grace always saw you come into the house ward, only greeting you with a smile before leaving the room. It seemed... robotic.

You managed to keep in touch with some of the Hargreeves siblings. You'd have chats with Allison during her breaks. Diego always sent you work updates when he worked for the police, but as a vigilante, he never spoke of his doings due to fear of tracing through digital footprint.

You worked as an astronomer, your love for space driving you to pursue it as a paying career. Sometimes it reminds you of when you'd stare up at the stars with Ben from the heights of an apartment building. You're laying on the couch, scrolling through the different channels on your TV when the news displays the death of one familiar person.

Sir Reginald Hargreeves.

Your attention is focused on the broadcast and the claims that were on the sliding title at the bottom of the screen. Your thoughts immediately drift to the reactions of his adoptive kids. He never developed an intimate bond with any of them, so how would they react to the news?

Wow. The age finally got to him. He was one persistent son of a bitch.

Allison, did u see the news?

I'm coming home as fast as I can

I was at a premiere

You shut your phone off, attention grabbed by a knock at the door. Though the face you see when you answer is not one you'd expect.

"Ben?"

His hands are stuffed in the pockets of his leather jacket. "Are you... real? How are you..." You touch his face, then his shoulders, then his arms, proving that this was not, in fact, his ghost coming to haunt you. "I've missed you." He says simply. You try not to gawk at him any longer and invite him inside.

He's focused on the TV, displaying the news of his father's death. "So she wasn't lying..." He mutters, staring at the TV with the same focus you gave. "She?" You ask. "Mom." He replies, standing behind the couch rather than taking a seat. "How did you find me?"

"Pogo. He knows just about everything."

"Even addresses? Creepy."

"Listen... when I was in that coma, I could see you. I could see my siblings, I could see who I wanted. I was in a black void and I was able to see anyone. But every single time, it brought me back to you." He says, his hand resting on yours. "You were aware you were in a coma? How?" He moves from the back of the couch to sit next to you. "When you were in the hospital to see me, I heard the doctors telling you."

You embrace him in a long-awaited hug, the first one you've had with him in a while. "Sorry, this is so much to process right now." Somehow, his last words before laying unconscious where he died come back to you. "Do you remember what you said before you passed out that day?" You ask, vividly remembering him saying 'I love you' as his 'last words'.

He pauses for a moment before answering. "I do." He looks you dead in the eye as you play with your thumbs nervously, looking for something to say. "Did you mean it?" Your nerves take control as panic rushes to your head. "I did. I do... I still love you. Even after all these years of me seeing you in a dark void of nothingness, you were always there." Your face is hot. You feel like a high-schooler being asked to a dance.

"I killed her. I killed Jennifer."

"I saw. It's not your fault. It never was. It was mine for killing her goons in that alley."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. We've both done things we can't be forgiven for."

Unsure of what to say next, you make the first move and kiss him, something you wanted to save when you were 18. He kissed back, eventually pulling away and looking at you. "How long have you wanted to do that?" He asked. "Since the day I realized I had a big, stupid crush on you." He smiles, kissing you once more on the couch when your phone vibrates in your pocket.

We're gonna meet at our old place

I'll see you there

Allison texted you, Ben reading off your screen as well. "Should we go now?" You ask, looking at his face which is a bit too close to yours. "We have time," he says, grabbing your phone and placing it on the coffee table.

"Let's make up for all that we missed."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

oh, dear diary, i met a boy! he made my doll heart light up with joy! 🎧

[thescentofrainonstone]

On Class in Britain and why the same kind of actor ends up getting our panties in a twist (see Hiddleston, Cumberbatch, Goode, etc...)

Isn't it peculiar that all this adoration and fandoms tend to be about white-cis mostly het (thought admittedly that's the more laxed of attributes) able thin, tall, pale but most importantly coming from riches guys?

You look at a Tom Hiddleston and his first headshots and roles and the wonder has got to be there: "how much time and means were available to him to get his degree from Oxbridge and then decide to do another entire BA on top of it at RADA?"

Admittedly he gets off easy going back historically("just" baronets in his line) when in his league we have Benedict Cumberbatch, whose existence is literally dependant on the slavery his direct ancestors built their empire on in Barbados, and were paid compensation when the end of slavery came to England. Finally his Wikipedia has a full description of this even though when I worked on the essay that took the Downton Abbey series and films as examples of the inhumane social divide the UK depends upon, it was all incredibly well swept under virtual rugs with a vague quote from Mother Cumberbatch advising her son to change his surname in case "they come after you for money" where money stands for "reparations" and considering the luxury of an arts career like the last few Cumberbatches have had is something intrinsically entrenched in wealth and privilege makes perfect sense if you ask me. A councillor in New York carries the same surname and she is Black. Slaves carried the surname of those who owned them.

Let that sink in: there is currently a commissiomer (and Professor at Columbia) in New York who carries the Cumberbatch surname because they are a direct descendant of the Slaves the Cumberbatches owned and owe their fortune to. Stacey Cumberbatch.

So yeah, when people think the UK is not the US, they Invented class and the divide that come with it. It is so crucial to come from a family that can afford you connections and the luxury to work for nothing while never risking bills or rent going unpaid.

And I guess what I'm trying to say is: it's ok for all the fandoms to salivate over anyone, I just think it's important we know why the media propels in front of our eyes the same prototype of Englishman over and over, and perpetrates the production of new pieces of media that casually seem naturally meant for white, rich, het passing people.

The system works like a bottleneck for privilege and I think the SAG-AFTRA strikes also show that: everyone that had some privilege and didn't do anything to average out the system will see their own reduced over time until only the tip of the top remains. And "eat the rich" is going to be another post but you get the gist.

That is to say, next time I go to Insole Court (the Victorian house where a Lot of A Discovery of Witches was filmed, including Matthew's "rooms at Oxford") will I touch every single book of the reading room because likely I will have touched something Matthew Goode touched when he was there filming? Sure.

I also do know that house was paid for by coal miners who actually died in a tragedy in the mines owned by the Insole family and that admittedly I find the only decent way to keep real estate built with the blood of people can just be that: give that back to the people.

It's about educated choices, that's what I'm trying to say.

Fun fact: I started watching a discovery of witches because after filming the essay at Insole Court, wanting to bring down the bourgeoisie, I learned the show was also filmed there. So i went and found it and now I have another white, pale, lanky, English twink to lose sleep over just because he's been given a character created by the mind of a woman who dreams enough, possibly because unfulfilled in some part of her life -because when we're happy we go out, we don't vomit pages over pages let's be honest -.

If none of those elegant white British men who embody the characters we love come from a program that allowed them to raise from the working class... or are anything but white or adhering to a white-er standard (Rege- Jean Page is the quintessential example of this, better than nothing but still, my point)...Maybe we should ask ourselves why, and how is that ok.

Just a random though on a day I wanted to go back to Insole Court for the aforesaid reason.

[randomvarious]

Today's mix:

Metro Tech 7 by DJ Marinho Fischetti 2001 Euro House / House / Trance

Took a trip down to early 2000s São Paulo, Brazil today with this very ephemeral dance mix that was put out by the city's Metropolitana radio station as part of their very own Metro Tech series. Never once in my life have I ever ventured into any of this locale's dance stuff before, but if this set is really truly representative of what was flowing throughout São Paulo at the time, then I guess I was expecting it to be a whole lot more Brazilian than it actually was? 🤷‍♂️

I mean, outside of the total banger that is Fogo's "Another Star"—which interpolates Stevie Wonder's own late 70s song of the same name, and is also therefore very similar to another Brazilian-sounding Bob Sinclar-produced house track by Salomé de Bahia called "Outro Lugar" that interpolates that very same Stevie song—the vast majority of the rest of this is just purely unremarkable trash that's been imported from mainland Europe; basically a bunch of songs that aren't Kernkraft 400's "Zombie Nation," but are just as janky and soullessly goofy with their rote and formulaic combos of things like squelchy bass vibrations and big and stupid, blaring melodies that are more fit for drunkenly chanting along to at soccer matches and hockey games. Não gosto!

But still, standing out from all of that transactional, mindless muck are actually a couple house gems here that don't have any of that cheap Euro-stink on them at all, like this release's final song, "Camels," which is actually a bonus track that falls outside of the mix itself, and is by a prolific Italian guy named Santos, who, from the looks of it, may actually have more aliases under his name than he has bones in his own damn body—and I'm assuming that his body is one with an amount of bones in it that most people would consider to be pretty normal!

"Camels" is a thumping, turn-of-the-millennium filter house delight that fronts with a lovely pair of dramatic and cinematic bits of orchestral string, along with a little piece of guitar funk as well, and then calms itself down with some distorted guitar synth fuzz on its bridge 🤘.

But the thing about that particularly terrific piece of sunshining dance bliss glitz is that you can find it on *plenty* of other releases; a song that I *definitely* can't leave you all today without mentioning is one that I don't think has ever appeared anywhere else besides this very Metro Tech 7 mix itself: a thing called "My President" by La Cubanita.

Now, to be honest with you all, I have no fucking clue who La Cubanita actually is. Discogs links them to a New York Latin house musician by the name of DJ Lucho, but I doubt that Lucho would exclusively release a song like this on some random-ass São Paulo radio station mix; because, really, if he did that, I think he fucked up big time—this song would've absolutely been his calling card.

See, what's so wonderfully odd about this very song appearing *exclusively* on a Brazilian dance mix from 2001 like this is how totally unexpected it is. This is a tune that stars a sexy-voiced, Spanish-speaking Latina who goes by the name of Mónica, and she gets passionately dicked—or perhaps cigarred?—down by none other than American president Bill Clinton himself, with pleasure-filled moans induced from her and all 😂. And normally, I really don't tend to enjoy the particular brand of tribal house that's on display here, but I think you can understand why I make such a big exception for this one. And of all the places to discover it too; like, what an absolutely ridiculous find here!

So, once again, never shut anything off, folks, because you really never know when you might come across an exclusive and exceedingly rare house track about a former American president's sex scandal on a mix from a country on a different continent that was most likely released when that president's successor had already taken office! 😊

Listen to the full mix here.

Highlights:

House of Glass - "Disco Down" La Cubanita - "My President" Fogo - "Another Star" Santos - "Camels"

[callipraxia]

[Well, this was supposed to be my big NWHS/ATOTS review...but I literally made it three minutes in before I got on an epic tangent and now I desperately want to write about and read up on stuff related to the tangent. I haven't desperately wanted to write something for quite some time, now, so the review proper will have to wait - as for now, enjoy ten observations on the first three minutes?]

Whew. Here we go. NWHS/ATOTS, planning to watch it straight through, let's go. It's gonna be intense, but we/I can do it. Probably.

Not What He Seems

Aaand now Stan's irradiated his forehead. No way this could ever have terrible consequences. He's better at lab safety than Ford, sure, but that's...reeeealllly not saying much. However, since Ford, Fiddleford, and Stan should probably have all had much worse side effects from constant improper handling of radioactive materials...maybe it's something about Gravity Falls' weirdness that shields them, or it's just not quite as dangerous in this world?

2. "Minor gravitational anomalies." Ford, that...feels like a bit of an understatement? Ok, so, I expect you could have written down "Stan, do not do the thing, it will make the house fly to Oz and destroy half the town. Yes, Stan, I'm specifically talking to you. Don't do it." and it would not have made any difference, but...'minor' is a relative term....

3. I am kind of impressed with Fiddleford managing to sleep, all things considered. Though who knows how long he's been awake, working on the laptop? I would give ten pretties to know what he knows at this point, though.

5. If I hadn't already done an AU stemming from NWHS, I...might be tempted, now that I think about it, to see what I could come up with in response to "what if Fiddleford had been awake when the laptop indicated the device had just become active?"

6. Ooh, is that a picture of a very young Caryn and Filbrick that the twins run under, after they pass the end table and just before Mabel stops in front of the random door she found? It looks...kinda like them, but also kinda pilgrim-y? But the woman's hairstyle is better suited perhaps for a very young Caryn, timeline-wise, and the pictures are more silhouettes than anything, and the male figure wears its hat very low.

7. Also, wow, does the Shack have a lot of doors or what? Manly Dan definitely should have picked different trees to build the Shack from...that, or the reality-breaker in the basement has started affecting geometry slowly upstairs over the decades. Which is also not a bad idea, I guess.

8. "I am the god of destruction!" More like a significant priestess at best, honestly, Mabel - no shade on you, of course, but when you've got the likes of Stanford "let's punch a hole in reality!" Pines, Stanley "danger, blah-blah-blah, can it, Poindexter!" Pines, Fiddleford "homicidal pterodactyl-bot I made when my wife left me" McGucket, and Bill running around in your setting...the competition is pretty intense, y'know?

9. Though I do wonder now if Mabel ever thought about that line again...if she remembered saying that, say, during the period where it looked more and more like the world might end...or that they might all get arrested...or after she heard that keeping the Portal open did not fix her family...maybe even when she handed "Blendin" the Rift, seeking a perfect endless summer....

10. "Plenty of summer left." "Enjoy it while you can, Stan." Stan really did think the kids might well never forgive him for lying to them all this time, and that's even if he got the real Stanford back alive. If he hadn't...if he hadn't, then he was confronted with the possibility of both the kids cutting him off and not even having the satisfaction of success to cling to. Or anything to cling to, unless you count loads of new guilt, now that he has seeming confirmation that he's responsible for Ford's death. I...do not see that ending well, really.

And yet, he took that chance. He could have decided "it's been so long that the odds of success are very low, and these kids are definitely alive and not too irradiated yet. I could just let this go. Settle for what I've got instead of endangering it for a one-in-a-million shot at getting back what I've lost." But he didn't, even though he was aware of how thoroughly failure really was an option. He was gambling everything at once, with no reserves to get him out of town if the dice landed the wrong way - willing, essentially, to burn the world (certainly his own world, but possibly, y'know...the world) for one person, for no better reason than his own feelings about that person and/or what had happened to that person. And I suspect this is at the root of what I find so interesting about him as a character. There's a reason, after all, why characters like this feature in so much of what's considered Literature, folks. [And here there were tangents; while I'm sure I will one day figure out what the character limit for tumblr posts is, I don't have enough hours in today to do it with]

[madi2112]

Pride at the Capital 2024

Two awesome days with Team Cher

Oh My Goodness! Where to begin? I guess the start is always a good place. I'm just afraid that all my descriptions and accolades about the positive vibes, terrific people and positive work we did as Team Cher will pale in comparison to how I feel about it all.

But I will try.

Day One:

Just one of the many great things is how we gelled as a team considering how random the team selection really was.

The training meeting was held inside the Imax theater at the Challenger Learning Center in Tallahassee. You simply walked in and chose any open place to sit.

Little did we know that all the people in the isle seats (which were already occupied) were actually our team captains!

So after the training on the legislative bills that were being supported and those horrible ones being opposed, we started to break into teams. They then split the row in half and our team was born!

Our team captain then gathered us togather for introductions and the overall game plan.

We were "Team Cher" (which I thought was team SHARE until seeing it on the paperwork later in the day. Lol)

Team Cher was the perfect size 8 of us and a wonderful blend representing almost the entire LGBT spectrum.

We had two older Transwomen (one a translesbian, me!). One still in high-school transwoman who was just unwillingly outed by Florida's terrible pronoun law. One older gay man, another one in his early 20's. 3 women one NB lesbian. A cisgender lesbian and a cisgender ally. Quite the mix!

<Team Cher minutes after forming. One person is out of frame on the left and our captain up close!>

It was then time to get the go over the schedule. Get our roles and head over to the capital steps for the group picture.

Each team that visited law makers had 5 roles. The Captain. The Scribe. The Opener. The Closer and the The Storytellers.

I was a Storyteller. No surprise there.

Before we had our first meeting with a lawmaker it was group photo time!

<I'm in there, about 4 rows from the top below the first column to the right of the entrance>

Next up was the Equality Florida press conference in the capital rotunda.

The press conference was every energetic, filled with passion and had great information about the utter garbage the Majority party is trying to pass.

< looking worn out already! 10 hours in and no where near done>

After the press conference it was lunch time (provided by Equality Florida) and planning meetings for our first lawmaker meeting.

The only one of us with prior experience at the capital was our captain, Devon. She was a wealth of information, a tour guide, advisor and calming presence when we got nervous. We couldn't have asked for a better leader.

Our meeting was with Florida Democratic House of Representatives member Susan Valdes.

She was wonderful! She listened to our stories (mine included) told us about her pas being raised in a Cuban-American household and soon our allotted 15 minutes was 40 minutes long!

This was a perfect first stop.

She inspired us and got us energized. I hate to think how the group may have reacted if we had an arrogant, condescending jerk as a first vist. Like we would later.

We then spend the balance of the day dropping off bill information to various lawmakers and the reasons why Equality Florida either opposes or supports them.

We were also trying to get walk up meetings but those were difficult as this session was only a few days old and was very busy.

Exhausted from going up and down the building at least 10 times we decided to do more bonding and planning over drinks and appetizers.

We headed out of the restaurant and back to the Challenger Learning Center for an Equality Florida reception and cocktail party.

One speaker mentioned a small LGBTQ book store called "Commen Grounds" just a few blocks away so we walked over (in the at freezing level temperature) and all made purchases to help out!

An exhausting but fun day with lots more to come on day Two.

~Madison

[disneyanddisneyships]

@gyubby99 here's my trauma recap

May be triggering so.....

Once upon a time~

My parents divorced when I was 3.

So I ssit h houses a lot which is really taxing because you have two homes but your parents wants you to consider their house your real home.

Anyways, along the time in there my aunt stays with me, my mom, and my sister for a bit. She's off her mess so she trips, falls and cracks her head open in the bathroom while 3 year old me is staring at the blood. (I don't remember this tho. Hence the thing I said abt forgetting trauma because it was too traumatic)

Don't remember anything until I'm in elementary school.

So at 8 years old I got made fun of and bullied a lot.

It's when my depression kicked in.

Got made fun of for my eyebrows, my curly hair, my laugh, and my weight.

Then my older sister moves out and never really talks to me again.

At the elementary school I'm at, my then best friend starts to constantly Dutch and abandon abandon for this other girl.

I begged my mom to move schools.

Then I finally moved elementary schools.

Everything was so great at the new one..... I made friends.... one by the name of Christian.....

I had two best friends, and a crush on this guy who was also a teachers kid like me.

One day, my two best friends don't wanna play what I want, but I already had social anxiety at the age of 9 so I didn't wanna fo anything new. They were fine with that so I turned around to get the stuff we usually do, I turn back and they ditched me... instant flashbacks to the other school.

We're friends again yadda yadda.

Elementary school ends.... I go to middle school....

One of the best friends in as talking about has a twin sister...

Her twin sister hated me for some unknown reason.... all she did was be mean to me.... my teachers were awful (except for my art teacher)... then my best friend and her sister moved to a different school....

I made new friends.. and oh hey, my old friend Chris is there. He does the weird "Yes, No, maybe" thing to qn eraser and asks it if we'd ever be in a relationship. Lmao. It said yes.

The year passes. Chris moved schools.

I had friends that were bad for my mental health. I started self harming.

But it's okay because I had 4 amazing best friends and a few other good friends.

This is when I get my first boyfriend.

He was okay.... I guess... I had art class with him and at the 8th grade dance he said he liked me and asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes.

But over the summer he ghosted me and my mom had to tell me to give up....

Freshman year of high school.

My dad gets a girlfriend and we all go up to see my grandparents in which my grandma and my dad's girlfriend were teasing me for having a fictional crush. It made me angry

I text the group chat with 3 of my best friends because I need a stress reliever.

My best friend just says "no" to the meme. Doesn't read it, doesn't care.

I blow up because I'm sick of disrespect. "I look at every single meme you guys send. I'm sick of you," is what I said.

My best friend blocks me.

I text my other friends trying to get her to unblock me so I can apologize. She unblocks me, I apologize. She doesn't accept it, calls me selfish and says "and you've lost 2 friends because this person doesn't like you either". I confront the other friend and she calls me manipulative, so I block her.

Me and the other friend didn't stay good friends for long (but they're cool now. We're in the same chour class. They have a Tumblr that I follow)

Um.... then I get closer with other people. Specifically my now former friends.... and.... my other friends ex....

I got so desperate to be loved that me and him started dating.

It was a secret and I didn't tell my mom....

Until she found out by looking at the bill of my phone....

Then she found out I had been self harming.... that was.. traumatic all on its own.

Anyways. Covid hit, and.. he moved schools for sophomore year..... over text we sexted a lot.... I was... desperate for some form of love....

But when I tried with boundaries... it.... I felt bad because when I said I didn't want to, I thought he'd hate me.. I thought hed leave me.....

I didn't even know what was happening was considered assault at the time...

The thing that really stuck with me was when he took his (small) dick out and brought my hand to it. I pulled away but he just grabbed my hand again and made me touch him....

Anyways um....

Later on he starts ghosting me.... a lot..... then one day after not hearing from him for 2 weeks he questions our relationship...

We breakup after 2 years... and we break up right before i go to Disneyland with my family.

He wanted to still be friends but I said i needed time.

I have a breakdown in the hotel at Disney.

And after about a week he texts me and asks if we can still be friends, I say no.

He starts trying to manipulate me. Calls me a bitch. I block him.

I get back from the vacation and I have two friends supporting me. Christian and my other unnamed friend.

I find out Chris likes me and had a crush on me in middle school...... he asks me out but I say no because I just got out of a negative relationship.. so I gave myself the entire summer to lull that over..

Then he asks me out again when senior year starts and I say yes.

He helps me realize that my ex assaulted me.... he also told the counselor by "accident" and I had to tell my parents....

Things go fine... but....

8 months later Chris starts to get flaky. He ghosts me for a while at a time (nowhere near the other guy though)

Until I find out that he told the counselor i was suicidal, and then he broke up with me.

And here we are.

[hinatastinygiant]

1 | Introduction

Pairing: Daichi x Fem!Reader

Only in Whispers

As you step out of your front door, the crisp autumn air greets you like an old friend. The sky is clear, the leaves are a beautiful orange, and you are filled with an infectious smile. You walk over to your mailbox, trying to get over the fifty emails that just made your brain feel like a hot garbage fire.

However, the sight of a white envelope tucked between your bills brings a sudden burst of happiness to your heart. You pull it out and see your name, "Y/N," written in an elegant script.

With a growing smile, you tear open the envelope and pull out an intricately designed invitation. It is made of a thick, white paper that has been embellished with gold trim and designs. Your eyes eagerly read over the words, and your grin widens even further.

The words "Kiyoko's Halloween Costume Party" were written in bold black ink on the front, and below them was an address for her house. Kiyoko always had a knack for creativity, and it really shone through her invitations. You can't help but chuckle to yourself as you imagine the amount of time she probably spent designing this. Then, without wasting another moment, you reach for your phone and dial her number. After a few rings, she picks up.

"Hey, Kiyoko," you greet her excitedly.

"Y/N! I'm guessing the invite finally made it to you!"

"Yup, just opened it now. It looks amazing. You really outdid yourself this time," you praise her.

Kiyoko chuckles on the other end. "Thanks, Y/N. I wanted this party to be extra special."

"Well, it already feels special," you assure her. "Is there anything you need help with to set up? I'm more than happy to pitch in."

"You're such a lifesaver," Kiyoko breathes, sounding relieved. "I would love it if you could stop by later this afternoon to go over some plans with me."

"Consider it done," you reply, making a mental note to wear clothes that you don't mind getting a little dirty or covered in glitter.

"Great!" Kiyoko sounds relieved. "Oh, and also I could use some help with the food and drinks. I'm planning a Halloween-themed spread, and it's going to be a bit elaborate."

"Sure," you agree easily. "What did you have in mind?"

"Hmm," Kiyoko thinks aloud. "Well, we should probably start off with a bunch of finger foods, since there are going to be a lot of guests. Then we can have a variety of drinks, including some spooky cocktails and mocktails."

"Sounds delicious! I can definitely think of a few things already. When I come over, let's review, okay?"

"Thank you so much, Y/N! You're a lifesaver. This party is going to be great!" Kiyoko's excitement is contagious, and you can't wait to help her bring her party to life. Together, you'll make sure her costume party will be a night to remember.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

The day of the party has finally arrived, and you stand at the entrance of Kiyoko's beautiful beach house, a sprawling mansion passed down through her family for generations. You've brought your backpack filled with last-minute party preparations and your laptop for some work you'll have to finish up by the end of the night. Then, you ring her doorbell.

The door swings open, revealing Kiyoko dressed as Alice from Wonderland. She doesn't waste a moment and throws her arms around you, enveloping you in a warm, welcoming hug. "Y/N, you made it!" she exclaims. "I love your costume. Dorothy suits you."

"Thanks," you smile back, hugging her just as tight, "but you know I wouldn't miss this for the world."

As you enter her house, you get to work right away, helping her set up for the party. You hang spooky decorations, cut and set up the designs for your food displays, and check the sound system for the perfect danceable music.

As the sun begins to set, the guests start arriving one by one. Kiyoko introduces you to some of her friends, and you can't help but feel a bit nervous. You haven't met many of her other friends before, especially the ones from her high school days. You lean in and whisper to her,

"How did you all of these people?"

"We went to school together. It's okay, I promise. They're pretty great," she says reassuringly, taking your hand and giving it a light squeeze. "Some of them have even been dying to meet you."

She then hands you one of the cocktails you made earlier, and you take a sip. Just then, Saeko Tanaka, dressed as the Great Gatsby, walks in and introduces herself to you. She's one of Kiyoko's friends from high school.

"So, you're Y/N," she says, her voice smooth. "Kiyoko has told me a lot about you. How have you been?"

"Likewise," you reply, feeling more at ease.

As the party buzzes with laughter and lively conversations, another guest, Yachi, dressed as a flapper, joins your group. She introduces herself to you with a friendly smile and offers to help bring the food into the main room.

With the party in full swing, you excuse yourself to Kiyoko, explaining that you need to head up to one of the rooms to do some work on your laptop since you own your own business.

Kiyoko nods understandingly. "Of course, you can use your usual room, Y/N. Take all the time you need."

You thank her and make your way upstairs to the quiet room, where you can balance work before enjoying the party. The soothing sound of waves crashing against the shore outside and the distant laughter from the party downstairs create the perfect ambiance for a productive evening before you muster up the courage to head back down and introduce yourself to a crowd of people you've mostly never met before. 

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

After finishing up your work upstairs, you make your way back downstairs to rejoin the party. As you descend the grand staircase, you can't help but notice the incredible costumes of Kiyoko's friends. The creativity and attention to detail are rather impressive.

First to approach you is Oikawa and Iwa who are dressed up as Rose and Jack from Titanic respectively. They look absolutely amazing in their period attire, and you can't help but chuckle at their commitment to the characters.

Then there's Kuroo, who's pulled off Han Solo's rugged charm flawlessly. He stands confidently with a blaster at his side like he's actually ready to take on the galaxy. Kenma, on the other hand, has chosen a more subtle approach with his gaming-themed costume, complete with references that only the most dedicated gamers would recognize. He's the epitome of cool and collected, even in costume.

You meet Akane next, dressed as a cowgirl, and her brother Yamamoto with Tanaka and Nishinoya, all dressed up as firefighters, their costumes complete with helmets and overalls. They seem to be having a blast posing for pictures.

After that, you introduce yourself to Atsumu who is dressed in a gold leotard. He confidently boasts about his knife skills and his culinary expertise, explaining that he is a personal chef, a smirk playing on his lips as he speaks.

But among all these characters, your attention is drawn to a handsome man dressed as Sherlock Holmes. You ask Kiyoko about him, and she informs you that his name is Daichi, a police officer. Intrigued, you find yourself crossing paths with him several times throughout the evening. The encounters seem accidental, but they only serve to fuel your curiosity about the mysterious man in the Sherlock Holmes costume.

Only in Whispers

[zirielladior]

ella's diary ୨୧

friday || 7.28.2023

hihi ella here !!

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

another nice-ish week. school starts on august 9th. i'm kind of sad, but at least i'll see some friends. i just don't want to do any school work. i still want good grades, of course, just.. without doing anything i guess.

my friend & i started a baking goal a few days ago. we were baking cookies and then his little sister came into the kitchen and asked if she could watch a movie with us. (she's eight.) and we said yes, we ended up eating all the cookies in three days, so we decided to bake again. we baked the famous pinterest jelly tart cookies. they came out pretty good, i almost burnt them because he went to shower and i started reading. but he got out soon enough and then went to check on them and they almost burnt. they're good though, i wish i could give you one right now for staying this look just to read <3 🍪

i spent a bit of today cleaning my room again. only vacuuming & organizing my closet, for almost the third time this month. and then i started reading another book i bought, it's called 'if he had been with me'. i saw it online & in a bookshop when i was in ontario for the summer, so i bought it! a lot of people say it's a little overrated, (not judging by the cover but by the actual book) and of course i saw it. i wanted to buy it anyway because it wasn't available at the library. (i can't really afford me buying books every other day so i usually go to my local library for books i see online that might be nice to read.)

also i've been writing a little bit of my own novel ideas. it think i might actually publish something, (hopefully if the KOSA bill doesn't progress.) on wattpad. not much of a fanfic although that's really the most popular side of wattpad. maybe. i'm really fond of writing a story that may reflect my dream life. you know..? like a good main plot with my dream lifestyle? don't know if it's a good idea though considering i just created this blog.

oh also, i've just started watching stranger things 4 !! i love the show up until now, but i've heard that vol. 2 could've been better. not sure, i just started episode one with my father on wednesday. i hope its not a weird season with a lot more people dying.

oh! speaking of which, i'm thinking of taking bass lessons soon. and maybe piano too. i've really wanted to play both for a while. he knows how to play bass, piano, drums, pretty much anything. he can make a tune out of recordings of every instrument and then he can make a nice instrumental song. he makes good poems so sometimes i tell him to make songs but he doesn't usually. he's making one now actually! i finally convinced him with elliot (his little sister) that he should write a song. so i think he's writing a song, maybe it's a love song for his crush. like i dunno but that could def be a reason why he's hiding it from us. otherwise he's pretty open about music and stuff.

him & i also went to a bakery in town. it was a bit close to the hotel his family & my family were staying at. (family friends trip, chill nothing weird.) so it was nice to go out and feel the night breeze. especially since i haven't been leaving the house much after being gone to ontario for an hour. we went shopping and i bought a cute cream colored mug with brown paint splattered on it, and a cute little baby tee that said gilmore on it !!

we went out to a cute bakery and had pastries and tea. we also bought candy from there for our sisters. mine's twelve and his is eight, but my sister's still pretty immature. they get along really nicely. his sister likes dolls, and my sister likes fixing dolls up. that's not whats immature about her, she genuinely acts five, but she loves dolls, and miniatures and making jewelry which i adore for her. if she's happy, i'm happy. in the end we both bought chocolate covered peppermint sticks with sprinkles. i think it was called lazy dog chocolateria. really great place, the food was sososososoo yummy.

anyway, so much for trying to keep a short entry. thank you for staying this long and listening to my conversations that were, really, just for myself considering not many people are going to listen to these.

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

love always, ella ୨୧

[tenkobitch]

𝚁𝚘𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜...

Kenma Kozume x GN Reader

Genre(s): Fluff, strangers to friends, crack moments

A/N: Hey guys! This is just a random thing I got inspiration for after reading (half) of a Kuroo fanfic. I hope y'all enjoy!

Moving out of your parents' house to go live right on campus wasn't an easy thing for you to do, considering you weren't a very social person. You knew you'd need a roommate to help you pay for food and bills, and despite your lack of social skills, you were willing to search for someone to live with.

In your first year, you were paired up with a girl who was rather nice. She didn't have any loud or obnoxious friends over, she didn't stay up late, she wasn't loud, and she just overall respected you... For the most part. She tended to get mad easily, and even if it wasn't at you, she'd yell at you like all hell broke loose. So, as soon as the year was over, you quickly packed your things and left to get another campus dorm.

In your second year, your roommate was a WHOLE lot worse. She had no respect for your privacy, she stayed up late into the night and kept you up as well, laughed as loud as her friends did while they searched through your shared fridge and only took YOUR food, and she always talked badly about you. Half way in your second year, your roommate sat you down and told you that SHE was moving to a new dorm because she could not handle YOUR behavior. You thanked whatever God was out there that she was finally gone until you got a new roommate.

Your new roommate, however, was an angel compared to your last roommate. He always cleaned up after himself and he offered to take you to places because you were nice to him. He was like a house husband of sorts. Too bad he had a girlfriend, cuz you would've definitely married him. He moved out of the dorm to move into a separate apartment with his girlfriend, so you were left alone once again.

That was until Kenma became your new roommate in your third year...

At first, he was extremely quiet, only coming out of his room for food, not even bothering to say a simple "hi" to you. You were a bit put off by it, but you started to get used to it because it meant that you could study in peace, and he'd just be silent in his room, like he was never there.

One day though, you heard a loud banging on your front door, wondering if Kenma had gotten a delivery or something, since he never had friends come over. You opened the door and saw a tall, black haired, bed head man smirking down at you as he talked, with what you assumed was a fake deep voice to seem cool.

"I'm looking for Kenma, but I guess you'll do." He said smoothly with a smirk you wanted to smack off his face, but he either didn't notice your distaste, or he didn't care. You opened the door wider to let him in as you turned back to call Kenma out of his room. Surprisingly, your usually awkward roommate was already out of his room, glaring daggers at the tall male. He kept his voice even and monotone as he spoke insults to the new man in your living room.

"Kuroo, how did you find out where I live? I never gave you my address." The bed head, Kuroo, smiled brightly as he came closer to Kenma.

"You didn't have to give me your address," he patted Kenma's shoulder even after Kenma knocked his arm away, looking him in the eyes as he continued. "Your mom gave me your dorm number and told me to check in on you and make sure you were making friends."

Kenma sighed heavily, but led Kuroo to his room. He closed the door behind him as you continued to stand by the door, wondering what to do next. You didn't have to wonder long because as quickly as he was let into your roommate's room, he was soon kicked out. Kuroo only looked at his friend's door, and walked back towards the living room and made himself at home.

"So, when's dinner?"

Not only were you dealing with a slightly louder Kenma, you also had to deal with an almost daily visit from Kuroo. You didn't mind that Kenma felt the need to be louder in the dorms, because you could at least talk to him and he wouldn't ignore you. You could actually have a full conversation with the black haired male without him walking off to his room. Although his answers were often short and quiet, you were still having a conversation! And with Kuroo being in y'all's home most of the time, Kenma was a lot more willing to show his true personality, especially when the bed headed male would test his patience.

The extent of your day was just listening to Kenma become increasingly annoyed by Kuroo, who was purposely trying to rile him.

"Kenmaaaa! Kenmaaaa!"

"WHAT DO YOU WANT KUROO!?"

"Can I get a cup of water?"

"..."

And you would watch as Kenma slowly stood up and walked to his room to get something to beat Kuroo up with. The bed head would usually apologize and stop his antics for a measly 20 minutes until he decided to annoy you.

It was your fourth year of university and you had managed to hold onto a roommate longer than a year. Kenma surprisingly signed up to be roommates with you again and you were happy that he was at least comfortable enough to stay with you. Kuroo had his own life of course (I know, shocker), so he wasn't able to visit you both as often as he had before, which made you nervous about how living with Kenma would be without the bed head being there to provide y'all with entertainment.

You both settled into your new dorm, and continued to have short conversations with each other. When you were hanging out in the living room, Kenma would be nearby playing on his switch, studying for upcoming tests, or he was reading a book.

He was mostly playing on his switch though...

You knew that Kenma was getting comfortable around you when he started sitting on the couch with you, constantly asking you if you wanted to play a new game he had gotten. You would agree and you learned to play all of the quiet guy's games (and you became obsessed with his games). He also recommended books that he had read and you started enjoying his company.

He also became a little more chaotic.

"Can you cook me eggs?"

"Why would I cook eggs for you, Kenma?"

"Because you're a really nice, kind, awesome, spectacular roommate that wouldn't want their roommate to move out."

"... Do you mean that?"

"Oh, heck no."

"Okay, good."

"... You're actually a really stinky and lazy roommate."

"KENMA!"

But you didn't mind having a slightly loud, lazy, messy, lousy... Maybe you did mind having a slightly loud, lazy, messy, lousy roommate like Kenma, but you wouldn't trade him for the world <3

...

*Bonus*

"Hey Kenma."

"What?"

"I'd definitely trade you for a Snickers bar if Kuroo offered."

"...WHAT THE-"

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭

A/N: Thanks for reading! It took me a couple of hours, determination, and listening to a lot of 2nd and 3rd gen Kpop to finish this.

[bearpillowmonster]

Today's got me all twisted up. So about a week ago, I learned that someone stole my Best Buy account and was buying and picking stuff up at Best Buys around Northern US. I had to shut it down and get a new credit card and dispute the transactions. Luckily, it didn't reach my bank, it was a credit card that I had on there but I go on Paypal today (which should be entirely unconnected) and see that there's a new billing address. I look it up and it's this dinky little house in Alabama. How would that get there? So now I have to figure out if someone got into that too.

Over the weekend, my sister went to a mall with my grandma and I've made previous posts about her but this is on a little bit of a different level. She's reflecting her husband's personality and adopting his habits, she's nothing like the way I remember her. This is coming from my sister who makes stuff up but the stuff she says seems to make sense in this context.

I'm gonna pop a spoiler here because I want it known that I don't want chastised for this, critique it all you want but please respect my opinion.

When I was a kid, my family made their best effort not to cuss, my grandpa, grandma, mom, even uncle, nobody did no such thing around me as far as I remember. I think my stepdad was the one that made me aware of a lot of them when I got past double digits. Cuss words exist, I get it, they probably said things that I've never heard, I'm sure everyone has and I see different family dynamics where they use cuss words and that's their family but for my little old grandma to suddenly come out and start cussing after years of my mom not even hearing it when she was a kid? Let alone in front of my siblings? It's not like her, it's not what she's doing, it's that she only does this because that's what her husband does.

The big kicker is that (I don't even know what brought it up) but she doesn't consider herself religious now?? You gave up religion for your alcoholic husband? She responded with "I have to believe it to see it."

She's someone that took me to her church before, she's well known there. She used to go on Wednesdays and Saturdays (catholic I guess) and participated in those dinners they held and would donate to them. And suddenly someone comes along and says they don't believe in that and you drop everything? I actually don't know what he believes because he's a drunk but I can't imagine it's much more than her from what I've seen.

Then the little remarks "Me and your mom are going to listen to each other from now on." And do what? When? And my sister actually pointed this out to her "That lasted real long." It's almost like she's trying to win the favor of these kids but also not really trying. "I'm not going to go to the beach for a whole year." way to to applaud a fish for swimming but what's the end game? You didn't clarify a reason so it doesn't count and you know that's not going to happen so why promise it? It's not like she'd use that time with us anyways. And she asks everyone "Are you coming over for Thanksgiving?" That was never a question before, it was a given, the only question was "what time?" but this time, she asked everyone individually, it's like she knows that something's different and honestly I'm not sure if she cares one way or the other.

But one thing hasn't changed, she loves to complain, loves to gossip, even does so to my sister about a bartender she's apparently friends with enough to babysit her dogs. But the problem with this is that, that's all she does. There's no break in between, there's no nice thing said to break pace or crack a joke like my own household does but she literally lives for its toxicity. So why is she still with these people? My sister actually asked this and her response was "Because he needs me."

Like what favor are you doing babysitting alcoholics, you're not helping them get better, you're just along for the ride, the drama, I know, I've been there, I dated someone who did similar things, my own sister does it, it must just be a girl thing, I don't know. "I'll leave if he drinks again." like I've heard for the past 4 years where he inevitably does drink again either in secret or a week later when he's in the hospital and can't move and nothing is done about it. If he was trying, I'd understand, addiction is horrible, but he's not.

But this is a lot to blame on one person because I think it's actually more than that now that I've had a day to process. I saw my uncle at the gas station, truck mirror still busted up from years ago (it's not an old truck either) facial hair all over his face (he'd never grow it out) hasn't been heard from in a while (not that I really blame him) and he walks out with a case of beer. He's probably a heavy alcoholic now too, it just looks like he's been letting himself go just like everyone else around me.

And really, I imagine it's because he's alone. He talks about this mysterious "Sean" that I've never even seen, every time I see him, he mentions his kids birthday parties, camping trips, fishing, everything you could think of. I went on "Sean"'s Facebook page, curious one day and there's not one picture of them together.

You see after my grandpa died, I remember my mom asking about her stopping going to church because it seemed out of the blue and she said that "he was more catholic than I was" or something along those lines and those spaghetti dinners and donations and participation and friends, stopped, she stopped them over time, little by little. Now, I'm not going to be hypocritical here, I don't really do those things, not necessarily because I don't want to but because I haven't found my place in world yet and she seemed to have it right on her lap.

My uncle also participated in this, he was right along side my grandparents but once she was out, so was he, he too lost his place because then everyone associates him with his mother despite going to church longer than she was, he might even still be going, like I said, I barely see him, he's an uncle but it didn't always used to be that way.

To hear that my grandma said that just really sets it in because I don't know what to do. She put herself in this situation and she acts like she enjoys hating it. I don't want to give up on her but I keep asking that she be shown the light here, for her own sake. I believe that my grandpa is in heaven, doesn't she want to see him again? Or is she ashamed of what she's become and is avoiding him. What if I die and make it to heaven but find out she's not there. It's just a surreal feeling that I certainly don't want because no matter what problems we have here in mortality, they won't transcend into death.

And the other thing that bugs me is that everyone acts the same. Like it's just another thing. How is my mom, who showed me what religion is, not worried? How is my dad- well actually, I'm not sure he could do anything either, his lectures aren't always effective but I don't know if she thinks God somehow failed her because my grandpa wasn't cured of his disease but he sure lived longer than the doctors said he would and that's all I could've asked for. Time is time, I came to terms with that, I came to terms with the idea that he's no longer hurting, that's my reasoning, I've told her my reasoning and while it's one thing to lose a grandpa and another to lose a life long companion, she acts like she moves on so quickly but she doesn't let herself breathe which I've also told her. It just makes me re-evaluate the idea of family, how do you deal with people that you don't know anymore. (coming from someone who believes in change)

[ogprincess96]

CHAPTER 1 - COKE COMA

BEFORE THE ACCIDENT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“ Maybe you should slow down “ I hear my paranoid best friend Corina mumble from beside me I turn to give her a sly smile as she slumps into the yellow floral loveseat.

“ I'm fine you know that “ Rolling my eyes playfully making the annoyed girl sigh.

“ Until you snort a line of fentanyl and die” Corina shoots back.

“ Can't wait “ I mutter as I put the hundred bill to my sore nostril and snort the line throwing my head back always hating the drop.

“ With everything Luxx has been through I don't think anything or anyone can kill her, “ I turn to Mabel Whos hanging upside down off the side of the loveseat.

“ This party must be pretty fucking lame considering all you two can seem to do is worry about me or think about me in some way. I'm having a fantastic time or I was till buzz kill Betty “ I snap looking between my two closest but my glare lands on Corina.

“ Now that you pointed it out, this party is lame let's leave “ Corina doesn't wait for a reply as she stands and walks through the crowd of teenagers packed in this dimly light, musty basement.

Sighing I also stand and start making my way through the crowd, Mabel grabs my hand as we make our way up the stairs and through the rest of the house. The house itself was beautiful I mean what house in Beverly Hills wasn't but being cramped in the basement so we didn't disturb wakes the sleeping parents upstairs was beyond overrated and nothing like the college parties we were used to.

~~~~

Corina pulls slowly to my parents' driveway and stays far enough that her headlights don’t hit the house.

“ My intention wasn’t to be a buzzkill Luxx” Corina says .

Until now the car ride to my house had been completely silent but more because we were all pretty fucked up, Corina didn’t partake in the coke but she had taken a few shots so none of us felt overalls talkative or that’s how I took the silence.

“ Rina , you don’t need to worr”

“Luxxus Rose, you get your ass out of that car this instant” Mother screeches as she halls ass to Corina’s ranger rover and tries to pry the passenger door open.

I sigh looking at my girls before unlocking the door and before I can even step out I’m grabbed by the back of my head, Mother has my hair in her grasp and before I can even attempt to steady my feet I feel myself falling.

——

The pain in my head pounds as I open my eyes to darkness, attempting to take a breath just leaves me coughing what felt like my lungs up it took a few seconds then it probably should have smelled the smoke.

Where am I? What happened?

“ Hello!, Hello, is anyone in here” Someone yells .

The energy to respond to whoever was calling out from the darkness was just not sustainable.

“ Over there , I see something “ A voice calls again

—-

TWO WEEKS AFTER THE ACCIDENT

I lay in the hospital bed pretending to be asleep as my mother's best friend Beth and the cps worker talk openly about my future on the other side of the dark wooden door.

Their voices muffled but I can still make out most the conversation .

“ Back in the system, I mean I guess that makes sense considering she has no living family but she will be inheriting a fortune couldn’t that be enough for a judge to see her as an independent, “ Beth says a sense of panic in her voice.

“ The girl is 16 and from what I’ve heard from the doctors she’s newly 16. A child, one with a troubled past no less I don’t think any judge in their right mind would look at that girl and think she’s mature enough to handle life on her own especially when they hear about all the drugs found in her system “ A rough voice responds.

A loud sigh escapes Beth’s lips as she walks away from the two other adults that seemed to have your future in their hands .

The door swings open and you look at a fragile, tired-looking beth. Her normally straight raven black hair was in a messy bun on top of her head, exhaustion all over her face.

“ I don't remember what happened, “ I say simply before a hello I mean truly what is the point of manners in a situation like this?

“ There was a kitchen fire”

“ I don't remember anyone cooking, last I remember my mom was pulling me out of Corina’s car by my hair “ Beth shakily sighed and moves closer to the hospital bed pulling a chair with her to sit down

“ Never say that aloud again understood,” Beth says sternly giving me a hard glare. I could see it in her eyes, she didn't know what happened either but she thought I was involved somehow.

“ Your mother called me frantic the night of the fire “ Beth starts as I carefully watch the woman as she refuses to make eye contact, fidgeting with the gold, diamond-studded bracelet on her wrist. “ Said you had snuck out again, for what was it the third time that week alone “ Beth harshly throws at but the sudden shade did not affect me.

“ She worried about you, always I thought it was her just being overly protective because of how hard it was for her to become a mother in the first place, and once she got the little girl she always wanted she was too frightened to ever let her out of her sight, afraid that the life she got after all the years she never thought possible would disappear in a blink of an eye, turn of her head, the closing of a bedroom door,” Beth says a soft but a sad tone now to her voice.

“ She’s overbearing “ I mutter with a roll of my eyes .

“ Most young girls think their mother can be overbearing it’s true. But listen to me Luxxus when I tell you, you’re not safe”

Beth’s words left me in utter shock as I just stare at the lady I’d known since day one of my new life.

“ What does that even mean” I spat anger now overtaking my body “ Do you know something! Do you know who hurt my parents? Do you! Speak” my voice making its way to a full-on scream.

The hospital door flies open and the officer that must have been the one you heard talking to Beth and the Cps worker steps in.

“ Everything ok in here Ms. Morgan,” The officer asks looking between Beth and me.

“ No, Beth was just leaving” I simply state and roll to my left side slowly closing my eyes

—-

“ Mama” I whimper letting my little feet carry me, stumbling every so often through the sand.

“ Mama I’m scared” I cry looking around trying to navigate my way through the dark night.

I don’t know how long I walked the beach, I don’t know how long I cried but my throat now hurt and I just wanted my mama to make me feel better.

“ Mama “ I Wail falling to the sandy beach floor.

“ Uh, Hello” A small voice calls into the night with all my strength I push my little body up to see a small light getting closer.

“ Mama “ I cry again .

“ Dad, Dad there’s a little girl out here” The small voice yells within just a minute or two a small boy was at my side with a flashlight the flashlight shined just enough on his face to see the small boy was older than me, he had blond shaggy hair.

“ It’s ok you’re safe now, I’m Rafe,” The boy says holding out his hand for me to take.

—

“ Luxxus wake up” I’m woken up by the shaking of my shoulder and the harsh whisper yell in my ear.

“ What the fuck” I snap

“ We need to go, we need to get you out of here,” Beth says in a panicked whisper.

“ Why? What’s going on ? “ I say equally as panicked “ Beth I just woke up from some drug dazed coma to find out I’m a orphan again , I’m not safe and still you don’t tell me what the fuck is going on”

“ There’s no time right now just trust me “

“ Where am I suppose to go I’m broke!”

Beth let out a cackle that made you jump, “ You? Broke sweetheart your parents left you everything, thankfully most of the money is in offshore accounts so I’ll be able to transfer to an account you can use “ Beth says more to herself than me, she looks off.

“ Offshore” I question not exactly sure what she meant by that

“ Luxxus what do you know about black beards treasure, “ Beth asks suddenly

You look at the older woman like she was completely losing it.

“ Nothing”

“ Don’t mind that yet , we need to get you home” Beth says brushing off your concerned demeanor.

“ Beth, I don’t have a home “ I mutter and truly I’m starting to wonder if my parents' deaths pushed their poor friend to her breaking point.

“ You do , Of course you do , the Outer banks”

—- 2 days later —-

I was here, the outer banks a place I barely remember and I am still unsure of why Beth sent me here.

“ Hidden in plain sight” Beth rambled on on the way to the ferry dock.

“Who is after me, “ I ask still as confused now as the day I woke up from my coke coma.

“ Bad men” Is all she said before changing the subject.

“ I know you don’t remember much about living on the island, but that island is small I'm sure many will remember the abandoned child years ago, we don’t want that you will have to go by a different name and maybe not that different “

“ No” I simply state “ Why the outer banks ?”

Beth sighs I’ve noticed she does that a lot .

“ All in good time” Beth replies.

I stare out at the ocean , up at the moon , the stars. You don’t see that much in Beverly Hills the city lights always taken over the natural night sky.

It wasn’t hard to have a party on this island I heard about two different ones while I sat inside a small family restaurant called “ The Wreck” earlier today and choose the one based on one of the teen boy's comment “ There’s going to be hella snow at this party “ and he was right there was, I did a few lines with some handsome boys and wandered towards the water afterward.

“ Hey”

I turn my head to see a tall guy standing behind me but moving closer once he sees I’ve I know legend his presence

“ Hello,” I said brightly with a smile not that he would be able to see in the dark. The boy sat down beside me and turned his head to face me the moonlight lighting his face perfectly. He was handsome, very handsome. His hair was slicked back but some hair dangled in his face I’m sure the wild night knocked some loose he had been throwing his head back all night doing lines, I remember seeing him before I took my lines.

“ I haven’t seen you around before “ He states , this wasn’t a question.

“ You’re right , I just moved here” I reply simply

“ Well at least you found yourself at the right kind of party, “ The boy says but I’m not completely sure what he meant by it.

“ Anyway I just wanted to make sure you were ok, saw those fat lines you took like a champ “

“ I’m a big girl but I appreciate a stranger's kindness to make sure I’m not over here Oding in the sand, “ I say with a small chuckle “ But I should be going it was nice to meet you ..” I say but quickly realize I never got his name

“ Rafe” The handsome boy says with a smirk,

“ Lux” I say with a smirk of my own as I make my way down the beach

“ See you around Lux” Rafe calls as he goes in the opposite direction

As I walk to my new home I can’t help but have a weird feeling in my stomach. Why do I feel like that name is familiar…

------

Please let me know what you think of Chapter 1 - Coke Coma

This is an Oc x Rafe story so I wanted to start with back round on Luxx. So it isn't all being thrown in at random times of the story .

I will add warnings when need be , it will get spicy eventually . I also want to add that the story starts at the very beginning of the show and will follow the storyline to the best of my ability .

Luxx will not be a Pogue or Kook just yet 😉 but she is one or the other by blood that will just be found out further down the story path.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #110

(taken february 2nd; uploading surveys taken while gone)

Have you ever taken classes, ie pottery, swimming lessons, etc? I took dance classes for maaaany years, and I also briefly got electric guitar lessons. I'm currently taking my second non-school-student type photography class, and this one is REALLY benefiting me. I've maybe taken more, but I don't remember any right now that weren't like, school classes. I guess you could include German, but taking a language was mandatory to graduate; granted, I took more classes than what was necessary to graduate in it. Lately I've actually been considering looking into venomous snake handling for once I'm in better shape and can react adequately so I can actually help people move snakes instead of them getting killed. I don't have any interest in handling venomous species beyond that, though. I just don't think it's smart.

Do you play games on your PC? I only really play WoW these days. I do however REALLY want to play the remake of Resident Evil 4 when it comes out in March, but I don't have an appropriate console, so I'm stuck with doing PC.

If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be? A TARANTULA. :( God I want at least ONE so badly. There was a great deal for one of my favorite beginner species on Craigslist the other day and you have no idea how tempted I was to ask Mom for the millionth time. 😭

Do you have an active sex life? Not so far as having straight-up sex, but I'd say we do "things" at a normal and healthy rate.

If you could change any law, what would you change? Why? Healthcare is fucking free, for everyone. I should NOT even need to explain the reason.

What would be your VERY last meal? If I had the ability to pick, uh... I really don't know for sure, it would still depend on what I felt like having...

Are you defensive about anything? Yes; my mental health and what I've dealt with/survived. I also get very uncomfortable when people shit all over things I like in the way that they make you feel dumb or weird for liking something. You're allowed to not like ANYTHING I like, but when you make me feel bad about it/like I'm morally doing something wrong by liking the thing, I WILL get defensive. I know part of that comes from my extreme hypersensitivity to rejection/judgment thanks to AvPD, so I'm probably worse about it than some people.

Have you ever driven 80+ mph? *I* haven't, but I've definitely been in cars that were going over that... which I wasn't happy about.

Have you ever changed a lightbulb? In my reptiles' heat lamps, yes.

Is your house energy efficient? Well I know Mom always complains about the electric bill, so I guess not. It is abnormally high compared to friends and family.

Any vacations planned? No. We basically never, ever go on vacations.

Did you ever watch Sailor Moon? Yes I did. My older sister was particularly absolutely obsessed.

What gym do you have a membership to? None, now. But the last time was the YMCA, which I liked WAY more than Planet Fitness. The people were very, very friendly and accepting.

If you had to get glasses would you wear contacts? I WISH I could handle contacts, but I just can't. I had an absolutely godawful experience where I put one in backwards once and it got completely stuck somewhere in my eye, like I was literally crying for at LEAST over 15 minutes fighting like hell to find it and get it out. I think that's the specific occasion where I changed to glasses. I eventually went back to trying contacts, but by this point I needed a weighted one in one of my eyes because my vision in it was so severe, and it gave me bad headaches. I could literally feel the weight ON my eye. Since then I've stuck with glasses.

Best party you’ve ever been to? One of Summer's as a teenager. We just hung out in this extra building that's at her place, which she decorated thoroughly, and we also had big ol' speakers playing music in there. It was very fun.

Have you ever been skinny dipping? No, but I have this weird urge to one day when I don't actually hate my body lmao

Best summer memory? Oh I have no idea, but I'm sure it was from my childhood. I've absolutely dreaded summer since like, a pre-teen.

Have you ever been surfing? No.

Do you own any Funko Pop! figurines? I don't.

Have you ever had Fiji brand water? I'm not sure, actually...

What’s the name of the local news network in your town? WRAL. Well, I don't know if my actual city has its own news network, but that's the big nearby one that everyone watches.

Have you ever colored in an adult coloring book as a stress reliever? Not necessarily as a stress reliever, I just wanted to.

What would you do if you accidentally got pregnant? Have an absolute emotional crisis/meltdown and get an abortion.

What’s your favorite Netflix show? Extraordinary Attorney Woo.

What was the last really intense pain you felt? A few days ago I had very, very intense stomach cramps that made me like silently gasp with how bad they were. It's really common I have stomach problems that go beyond normal cramping when I'm on my period.

Who was the first male you talked to today? What colour are his eyes? Girt's eyes are brown.

Are you wearing any accessories in your hair? Describe them. No, I never do.

Who was your first best friend? Do you still speak to that person? Brianna, and no. Although I did see her mother the last time I was at the dentist, and between she, my mom, and me, we're thinking of planning a get-together with the family whenever Brianna next comes back into town. I really would love to see her, although I'm uh, kinda nervous about the idea. Brianna is way, WAY more successful than I am and I worry she'll be disappointed in me and what I became.

Have you seen the person you love/like recently? How is he/she doing? It's been around a week and I miss him super badly. He was really stressed out recently, primarily because of work, but he told me yesterday that the day he took for himself really, really helped him refuel, so I'm very happy about that. He's apparently very excited for this weekend though so that makes me happy.

How many vowels are there in your full name? Six.

Do you like your middle name, or does it embarrass you? It's pretty, but I absolutely hate how insanely common it is.

Are you wearing anything that was given to you as a gift? Yeah, my current pj pants were a Christmas gift, as were the gauges I currently have in my ears.

Are you attracted to the last person you Facebook messaged? I think she's a beautiful woman.

Name a singer that you like, whose name starts with the letter "C." Chris Cerulli/Motionless is a great one.

Who is the sixth contact in your phone? What colour is his/her hair? She's actually a natural redhead.

What is your brother/sister’s favourite food? I don't know any of my siblings' ACTUAL favorite food, but I can tell you Nicole's is probably a Mexican dish, she fucking loves Mexican food.

Do you have any ice-cream in your freezer? What flavour is it? No, we try to not keep ice cream or just sweets in general.

In your life, who is the person that seems to understand you the most? My mom, I think.

Which one of your friends do you see/hang out with most often? I only really ever hang out with Girt, but he's way more than a friend so idk if he counts here.

If you want children, what are some of your reasons for wanting them? I'm not gonna go deep into this because I don't even like entertaining the idea of allowing myself to have kids, but I guess primarily to give the world a person/people who I believe can do great things. Then there's also I just like... want to do/make SOMETHING I'm proud of, but that's not the reason you should have a kid. I also really do think that especially as they got older, I could really be friends with my children.

What were some fun experiments you did in science class as a kid? This was obviously painful on the heart to do, but I will never forget dissecting a frog. It was SO fascinating. Dissecting owl pellets was also very cool, like some people would find actual rodent skulls and stuff. I know there are others, I really loved doing science experiments, I just don't remember them now.

What was the last strong emotion you felt? I was very stressed last night talking to Mom about going back to my old therapist once she moves into her new business.

After finishing a bowl of cereal, do you drink the leftover milk? No. Well, I guess not NEVER, but it's super rare and depends on the cereal.

What’s your favorite sub-genre of rock? Hard rock.

What historical event would you have liked to witness? Even before I was big into German culture and stuff, my answer to this was the fall of the Berlin wall. A country coming back together is a wonderful, powerful thing. I've seen pictures and videos of the event and oh my god it's incredible.

Who was the last person to get frustrated with you, and why? That I KNOW of, uh... realistically probably Mom, but idk what I most recently did to make her feel that way.

Have you ever lived with someone you didn’t get along with? No. At least, we didn't consistently not get along.

What’s something that bothers you more and more as you get older? Why people get so fucking bent out of shape for others leading their lives in a totally harmless manner just because they disagree with what they stand for when it has ZERO effect on them. That is just a special level of SEEKING out something to be mad about and also emphasize how much holier than thou you think you are. It's fucking infantile.

What types of animals have you had as pets? Cats, dogs, guinea pigs, lizards, rabbits, rats (and maybe mice, I'm not sure...), gerbils, snakes, hamsters, fish...

What was the last fruit you ate? It was uhhhhh... maybe grapes...? I'm not sure, really, as far as just straight fruit goes.

What gives you immense pleasure? Finishing something that I feel was truly productive, especially if it's something I've been putting off.

What is an article of clothing you would never ever wear? Thongs, they are wildly uncomfortable.

Have you ever been afraid to get up and go to the bathroom? Yes; many, many years ago when I had a hemorrhoid (second-most physically painful thing I have ever been through) and basically wanted to fucking die. I also kinda just have gastrointestinal issues in general and have my entire life and there are times where my stomach wants me dead very, very suddenly and I never actually look forward to taking care of the whole process lmfao, I'll spare you the details.

What would you do if you knew a robber was in your house? It would probably depend on where I hear noise going on, and if my mom is home; if she is, I'm going to try to get into her room across the hall first, but I can guaranfuckingtee she'd either be beating the absolute shit out of the robber or be in my room quicker than you could fucking blink; she DOES NOT fuck around when her kids/grandkids/kids in general are at risk. Once she's in there or if I'm home alone, I'm/we're going out the window and getting a neighbor to call the cops.

Who’d you last see in a tux? In person, most likely the groom and groomsmen at the last wedding I shot.

Have you ever sexted? I've sent sexual texts before, but I've never gone past that.

Out of everyone you know, who has the most heart? My mama.

Who’s the bravest person you know? Also my mom.

Have you ever given up on someone before? I mean, yeah. I think everyone has.

Did you end up regretting it later in life? No. At least, not that I remember.

Have you ever done something terrible, but took forever to feel bad? How I treated Jason after he left, yes. I was 120% fully convinced everything I said was justified for years. I was very wrong.

How come no one knows what MGMT is? Coincidentally I know and like one song by them thanks to Girt, "Little Dark Age." I wanna listen to it now, thanks, lol.

What did you dream about last night? I just remember it had Juan in it, which was REALLY weird?????? Also we were getting hotdogs? Idk bro lmao

Have you ever tried to change someone? Yes. Never should've in my case.

Have you ever made a fake profile, for any reason? Nope.

Do you miss your ex? Not anymore. I don't miss people who ultimately didn't support/believe in me.

Have you ever questioned your sexuality? Yup, starting in the 8th grade. I basically had a crisis over me being bisexual, but I was VERY Christian at the time and eventually managed to just repress my feelings until adulthood. Religion did so much fucking harm to me and the kind of person I was.

Do you have mean comments that replay in your head and haunt you? FUCKING YUP.

^ If so, do you know why that is? Because I always, ALWAYS worry about what if they're actually right? I have this problem where I second-guess my own intentions and shit ALL the time, like a part of me is so convinced I'm actually a bad, manipulative person, even though in my *heart* and *core* I don't believe that at all... but it's a problem I've been totally obsessed with for years. I will latch the fuck onto "what if"s like nobody's business.

What are you currently worried about, if anything? I can't for the life of me pick out a gift for Girt for Valentine's. I have future ideas for sure, mostly custom products, but I need pictures of us, and none exist because we're both not picture people, so they're out of the question for now. I'm absolutely running out of time. I have a drawing/painting I want to make him planned, but I need to actually fucking DO it, and I want to get him more than that anyway.

When you have your own house someday, what color Christmas tree do you want and how will you decorate it? I ABSOLUTELY want a black Christmas tree with white faux snow/frost, then probably use ornaments of a specific color scheme each year. Already told Girt we're getting a black tree and he's totally on board, y'all I got me a WINNER

Name 3 YouTube channels you’ve been loving lately. GameGrumps has been my go-to, but I also regularly watch WoolieVS and John Wolfe.

Do you have a YouTube channel? Yeah, and I'm actually very heavily considering getting back into making Meerkat Manor tribute-esque videos. This laptop doesn't have a disc tray though, so I can't put my DVDs in and save the footage, and it's not at all easy to find quality MM footage online. I've been working on a list of projects I wanna do, though.

If you could win a shopping spree in any store, what would it be? Rebel's Market.

What color was your senior prom dress? Black. I really wish I hadn't deleted all those pictures, the dress was so pretty, *I* was pretty (though I didn't think so back then), I looked so happy...

Name the people you know who are colorblind. Jason's older brother Jonathan is like... red/green colorblind, if I remember right. It was some two colors.

How good are you in trivia games? What’s your best category? It really depends. I'd say I know more trivia than the *average* person (literally mostly from my GMM days lmfao), but I am absolutely not amazing at it. I could always like, ace animal behavior/science questions, though.

Are you a sore winner or a sore loser? Neither, in total honesty. I believe everyone deserves their time in the spotlight, especially when they worked hard for it, so I'm happy for 'em when it's their turn! I'm not gonna lie and say I wouldn't be DISAPPOINTED if it was something I was very serious about and worked hard on (like for example, a photography competition), but it won't go beyond that.

Who is your absolute favourite film director? Tim Burton. I LOVE his style and endless creativity.

What is a question you would never ever ask somebody? Things like if they were ever assaulted. Very triggering things.

[helloalycia]

first impressions [three] // lena luthor

summary: you start working for Lena and begin to realise she favours you more than a boss should, but you still don't know if you can consider her a friend or not.

warning/s: mentions of trying to kill Superman I guess!

author's note: and here’s part three, if there’s any lena fans out there. one more remaining after this! ☺️

one / two / four / masterlist / wattpad

Being hired by Lena Luthor wasn't something I realised carried so much weight until the benefits began to show themselves.

At first, it was a matter of being introduced to her team and understanding what they wanted from me. I'd never worked on something so large-scale, but I was adamant on not letting Lena down (for two reasons – one, that would be very embarrassing and two, she'd probably regret ever hiring me).

Despite being hired by her, I rarely saw her since this wasn't her forte and she merely made the executive decisions that trickled down to her marketing and graphics department, AKA me. Even though I didn't see her, I felt her presence everywhere and it was certainly surprising to say the least.

If I wasn't receiving a surprise lunch delivered by the CEO's assistant, it was feedback from the team I was working with, taken from her letter addressed to me. She'd occasionally send me a text to let me know she approved what I was working on, or something to just let me know I was doing a good job. And whilst the appreciation was very sweet, I wondered if she did this with every external contractor she hired.

She'd stopped by, maybe, five times in my work there. And it was when she was free and wanted to get lunch with me. Again, surprised was an understatement, but I was eager to accept her offer as I found myself intrigued by the green-eyed scientist.

"You know, when you said lunch, I didn't think we'd be dining like the royal family," I said during our first lunch jokingly, but I wasn't lying.

The place she'd taken me to was full of business professionals, no doubt wearing an outfit worth more than any paycheck I'd ever made. You could tell they belonged here, a place that looked like it only housed millionaires. Lena looked the same, too, fitting the part and wearing a striking burgundy suit that complimented her bright green eyes, alabaster skin and raven-coloured hair. I was actually pretty intimidated by her, but I tried not to let it show.

At my comment, she chewed on her lip worriedly. "Is this... not appropriate for a lunch outing? We can leave if you like."

"Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that!" I reassured, shaking my head. "I just– this wouldn't be my first choice for lunch. Mostly because it's worth more than I can afford, but also because I'm a huge fan of KFC or McDonald's or..."

Literally any other takeaway that was quick, cheap and affordable, but I didn't say that.

"This is perfect," I amended my ramble, flashing Lena a smile. "I just hope you're not spending too much on my behalf."

She'd insisted on paying on the drive over here and now I was beginning to be glad for that fact, definitely knowing I wouldn't be able to foot this bill.

"It's not a bother," she assured with a relieved smile. "The food here is some of the best in the city. I thought you may like to try it. Though, of course, you may pick the restaurant next time."

I smiled, distracting myself with laying my cloth napkin on my lap and hoping she couldn't see the blush on my cheeks. Next time? There'd be a next time?

"So, how are you finding work?" she asked, and I looked up to see her watching me with kind eyes.

"Pretty amazing actually," I admitted, relaxing at the thought of it. "Everybody is really easy to work with. And we've been visiting some of the children's hospitals so I can get an idea of what it's like... it's pretty bloody awesome what you're doing, Lena."

She shrugged, eyes darting to the menu before her, a bashful smile on her lips. "It's not much."

"Not much?" I asked with amazement. "You're probably one of the few billionaires I know that uses her money to do good." I chuckled, rolling my eyes. "What am I talking about? You're the only billionaire I know. But that doesn't change the facts! You're awesome."

"And how did this conversation get to me?" she said teasingly, though I could tell she was trying to draw away from her inability to accept compliments. I found it adorable. "I want to know all about how you're settling in. I would have visited sooner, but things get pretty busy up top."

"It's all good," I said with a shrug. "I wasn't expecting you to check in. I'm just grateful for the opportunity."

She leaned forward on her palm and watched encouragingly, so I cleared my throat and tried not to feel intimidated by her bright, peering eyes.

"Like I said, it's amazing," I continued with a short nod. "It keeps me busy, but I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Not too busy, I hope," she joked with a smile. "Work-life balance is important for my employees."

"And I assume that applies to you also?" I retorted with a quirked brow, knowing it was definitely not the case.

She chuckled, leaning back. "Well, I didn't get this far by slacking. You put in the graft, you get results."

I nodded with a knowing smile. "Took the words right out of my mouth."

She rolled her eyes playfully, at a loss for words since I'd proven her wrong. I laughed at her expression, finding it cute, especially since I never expected to render her speechless.

"Look, if it makes you feel better, I promise I'm taking breaks and all that jazz," I said in an attempt to reassure her and also hide my amusement a little more. "I just don't want to let you down, if I'm being completely honest."

She tilted her head, quirking a brow. "You're not going to let me down. I know it."

I would have assumed it was something one just said to make someone feel better. But the way she said it and the way she looked at me with complete and utter faith made me realise she genuinely believed in me and my abilities. And that was always a great feeling. Especially from someone as successful as her.

"Well, thank you," was all I could think to say, forcing myself to look away because, as always, Lena Luthor had a dangerously intimidating gaze, whether she meant to or not.

"Come on, let's get ready to order," she said softly, and I risked glancing up to see her smiling at me.

We both perused the menus, myself trying to make sense of the complex dishes that had stupidly fancy names for no reason other than to show how posh and expensive it was. And then I finally decided on one of the cheapest and easiest to pronounce dishes, reciting it to the waiter when he came to take our order.

Lena wasn't stupid of course, and her expression faltered when she realised what I'd done, but she didn't make a scene about it, thankfully. When the waiter took our menus and left, she gave me a disapproving look.

"Did I do something wrong?" I asked innocently, flashing her a smile.

Her eyes softened. "Y/N, this is supposed to be a treat. You should have ordered whatever you wanted."

"I did," I assured her.

"Oh, really?" she played along. "And it just happened to be one of the least expensive dishes on the menu?"

It was incredibly rude to get something expensive when someone else was paying, and that was especially more difficult to avoid when the whole menu included dishes with three digits in the price. But I wasn't so sure Lena would understand that, and I definitely didn't want to offend her.

"I am a girl with simple taste," I said in a lighthearted manner. "I see macaroni and cheese and I choose it. Nothing more and nothing less, I promise, Lena."

She bit her lip, not believing me, but she gave in with a nod and leaned back in her seat. "Fair enough."

I crossed my legs as a smile soon curved on her lips once more.

"You know, I was going through my closet the other day and I came across something interesting," she said with enough mystery to intrigue me.

"Let me guess," I said with a grin, "you found a loose dollar."

She quirked a brow of confusion and I chuckled.

"Finding spare change is, like, the best thing ever," I pointed out, before realising the joke went over her head since she probably never had to worry about something like that. "Sorry, go on. I'll laugh at my own joke later."

She rolled her eyes playfully. "I found this."

Reaching into her coat pocket hung on her seat, she pulled out a badge and set it between us on the table. Motioning for me to look, I grabbed the badge and realised it was visitor's badge I'd given her the first time we'd met, back when I visited L-Corp for the first time. My stupid little face was on a tiny picture on the back, along with my name, and I laughed quietly at the memory.

"This is... quite embarrassing," I admitted, looking up at her amused expression. "You definitely didn't need a visitor's badge that day."

She chuckled at the memory, too. "I didn't. But it was sweet of you to offer yours up."

Heat was rising up my neck, though I tried to play it cool. "Well, I just thought the receptionist might not be too happy about seeing you without one. Of course, I now know that your name is literally on the building..."

She laughed, eyes sparkling and making my insides turn to jelly. Making her laugh was starting to became my favourite thing.

"I'm glad you noticed," she joked. "I found the badge in my jacket pocket. I thought you'd like the reminder of our first meeting."

"Oh yeah, I'd love the reminder of not knowing who my boss was," I said sarcastically, but my fingers curled around the badge. "It's so stupid. But thanks."

She nodded towards me. "I thought you'd like it."

After that, we talked about how my work was going with the rebranding and when it would be done by, particularly so she could start thinking about the grand reopening of the charity, which I would also be designing. It was very work-filled with the occasional flitter off topic and into our personal lives, but it was the start of something new.

This was the first lunch between us, and it only led to more. She visited me at work much more than she used to since then, treating me to many more lunches in a bid to see how things were going, but it was obvious that it was much more than that. Again, I wasn't convinced she did this with every external contractor she hired, but I chose not to think too deeply into it.

Instead, I let her take me out for lunches and visit me, taking an interest in my work. She even let me take her out sometimes, choosing a place of my choice. The sight of Lena Luthor sitting in a McDonald's was one I'd never forget, that was for sure.

It was only ever that with us, lunch outings that lingered just before the line of crossing professionalism, since technically it was for 'work purposes'. But we both knew it was more, almost like we were friends. I wasn't sure if she'd ever use that word to describe us, but I liked to think she thought about it like I did.

Not long later, my work at L-Corp came to an end. The rebranding was done and the grand reopening of the charity was upon us, with a special day party dedicated to celebrating all that she'd achieved thus far, and whatever was to come next.

It was a stunning affair, even for a children's hospital 'party'. The building itself was spectacular, but in true Luthor fashion, it was an art piece in itself with tall ceilings, colourful walls and open space. Perfect for children, as it's purpose was, but also currently well-decorated to welcome party guests and also include the children who were residing in the hospital. The best part was seeing my work projected all around – in the logos, the colour scheme, the posters. Kind of like a dream come true to be honest.

I attended for the sole reason of showing my support of such a fantastic endeavour and to conclude a portion of my life which I could sense was coming to a close, but I was surprised at what came next. Lena Luthor knew many famous names, wealthy people and important figures, whom were attending this very party. I never expected some of them to approach me, knowing who I was and talking to me about my work.

If it couldn't get better enough, they were looking to hire for their own businesses and non-profits, and they wanted to hire me. I wasn't sure how to react at first, too shocked to realise that I was getting more potential clients who would pay just as much as Lena did for work that was mine. It didn't dawn on me that it was because of Lena that this was happening, not until she found me for the first time since introducing the rebrand to the press.

"Somebody looks happy."

I spun around at the sound of Lena's voice, just after watching yet another potential client walking away with my business card in hand. She looked beautiful, wearing a stunning maroon coloured dress and matching coloured lipstick with dark eye makeup that brought out the green of her eyes. I'd almost forgot that she spoke until she quirked a brow of amusement, waiting for me to say something.

"I am," I breathed out, smiling. "You wouldn't believe how many people have come up to me, wanting to hire me for a project."

"I know, I recommended you," she said with a knowing voice.

I raised my brows with surprise, jaw practically dropping.

"That's what happens," she said nonchalantly. "People talk to people. They network. Pass on contacts."

I studied her, leaning back with disbelief. "I mean, yeah, but... your people are also other billionaires. You know how huge that is for me, right?"

She shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, smile still on her lips, and oh, how wrong she was. The littlest of actions from her could cause a hurricane, could literally change my life. And they had. And I would be forever grateful.

Without really giving it much thought, I hugged her. She seemed surprised, hands wavering on my back as she realised what was happening, and that's when I came to my senses and pulled away with an embarrassed smile.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to– sorry," I said awkwardly, hoping that wasn't too unprofessional. She wasn't exactly a hugger and so this was the first one I'd given her. "I just– thank you. For doing this."

She shook her head, surprised expression settling into a smile. "You don't need to apologise. And you're welcome, Y/N. Though, your work speaks for itself."

A quiet breath escaped my lips, relief flooding through me at the fact that she wasn't bothered by the hug. "Thank you for giving me a chance to show people what I can do. This looks amazing, Lena. All of it."

I looked around, letting her know what I was referring to the hospital, before settling my gaze on her profile as she did the same. It was becoming easier and easier to forget she was my boss when I found myself admiring how perfect she looked. Though I guess, now, she technically wasn't my boss anymore.

"Thank you," she said, looking back to me and pulling me from my daze. Then her eyes briefly looked me up and down before she added, "This day is just as much yours as it is mine. And you certainly look the part."

I couldn't stop my smile from widening at her compliment. "That means a lot, thank you. But you look just as good. Beautiful, in fact. But you always do, right? It's your thing."

She laughed at my words, probably taking them as a joke, but I meant it and I probably should have said it in a more genuine way, but I wasn't sure I could without her realising that I really did think she was beautiful. This was the next best thing.

"Thank you," she said, settling on a bright smile.

I returned her smile, letting myself admire her a little more until someone approached us and interrupted.

"Kara, hey," Lena greeted the blonde woman who approached us, tearing her gaze from mine to look to her.

"Hey, I just finished interviewing some of the nurses and thought I'd see how things were going," this Kara woman said with a cheerful smile.

Lena linked arms with the woman before looking to me with kind eyes. "Y/N, this is Kara Danvers, my best friend and also a journalist at CatCo who happens to be covering this event."

"Ah, so you're Y/N," Kara said before I could reply, and a cheeky grin was on her face when she put out her hand for me to shake. "It's so great to finally meet you. Lena has–"

"Mentioned your work many times to her," Lena finished with her signature classy voice, unrevealing of any nerves I assumed she suddenly had at her friend calling her out.

I tried not to laugh as I shook Kara's hand, looking to her. "It's great to meet you, too, Kara. I hope you've heard good things."

"Oh, definitely," she assured, glancing at Lena before adding, "And can I just say, your work on the rebrand looks amazing. You've certainly got an eye for design."

"Well, it's always good to hear that since it's my profession," I said jokingly, making her chuckle. "But thank you, I'm glad you like it."

"You know, I think it would be great to interview you for the article," she said as an afterthought. "Maybe hear your thoughts behind the whole rebrand? And maybe a little bit about what you think of the charity in general?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Oh, er, I guess. Not sure if I'm that interesting, but always happy to help."

"I'm sure you are," Kara said with amusement, before glancing at Lena. "You mind if I steal her away from you for a moment?"

Lena raised her hands, smiling. "She's all yours."

Kara looked to me, motioning for me to follow her, so I gave Lena a final smile and nodded.

"Thanks again," I said once more, knowing it would never be enough, before following after Kara.

————————

It was about a few weeks since that event when I reached out to Lena next. We didn't technically work with each other anymore, and neither of us had seen each other since the grand reopening, so there was never a need to contact one another.

We'd left it at a point where I wasn't too sure if she considered me a friend, or anything beyond her subordinate, and the last thing I wanted to do was push her to feel the need to stay in touch, not that I was sure I could do that anyway. But then one morning, whilst I was working on some mock-ups for a presentation I had later that afternoon, I heard the name 'Luthor' on the news and looked up.

"...infamous Lex Luthor has escaped from his prison cell in the early hours of this morning," the newscaster was explaining as photos of the broken jail cell appeared behind her. "His whereabouts are currently unknown, but he is presumed to still be in National City and all residents are asked to take extra care and report anything suspicious..."

I furrowed my brows, taking in the content on the TV as they explored his case in a brief but informative way. I only knew so much, but the main point was chilling – he had turned the sun red in an attempt to kill Superman, got caught, and killed the judge and jury who put him away. They showed appropriate pictures of the whole story, making me uneasy despite the fact I was very much safe in my sister's flat, and then they showed live footage of the outside of a building where a familiar black jeep was pulling in.

Cameras were flashing, journalists thrusting their microphones towards the car as none other than Lena Luthor stepped out. There was no sound on the footage, as the broadcaster spoke over the top, explaining how this was happening right now with everybody wanting to know what Lex Luthor's sister thought about the whole escape.

It wasn't hard to see that she wasn't comfortable with all the cameras and people, even with her security guard guiding her to the front of the building. Sunglasses covered her face as she kept her head down, ignoring the questions thrown her way, and my heart broke a little because I couldn't even imagine how she must have been feeling.

Changing the channel, I saw that pretty much every other news broadcaster was reporting the same thing, some even going on to theorising that Lena may have had some involvement in her brother's escape. Just the mere sight of people already blaming her made me frustrated, so I ended up turning the TV off and sitting in silence for a moment.

I didn't know her well enough to check in, but I felt helpless knowing it was going on and there was nothing I could do. I had not a single doubt in my mind that Lena had nothing to do with her brother's escape. She was nothing like her family, always having to prove exactly that with her actions, and if anybody took a moment to have one real conversation with her, they'd know the same.

It was hard to focus on my work after that, knowing that so much was going on outside of it, but I also knew that I had to smash this presentation if I were to gain another client. All I wanted to do was call Lena, see if she was okay, but I had no right. There was no place in her life for me. But she had Kara, from what I knew, so that helped put me at ease slightly, and I got through the afternoon's presentation better than I expected.

Of course, as soon as it was over and the Lex Luthor story developed everywhere I looked – the TV, newspaper stands, websites – I felt the need to do something. Just to let her know I was here for her.

I risked calling her, feeling stupid but my concern getting the better of me. It rang in my ear and I held my breath, anticipating her voice, but I only reached her voicemail. That wasn't unexpected, since I could only imagine the amount of attention she was getting right now. So, I sucked up a breath and waited for my moment to speak.

"Hey, Lena," I said carefully, once the tone went off. "It's Y/N. I just wanted to say hello and, er..." I cleared my throat, suddenly nervous. "I just– I saw the news and I–"

I pulled a face, internally scolding myself. Of course she knew I'd seen the news. Everyone had.

"It's a tough situation," I continued awkwardly. "I mean, obviously more than tough, I can imagine. So, I just wanted to say that, if you need to talk or just want a–" I swallowed hard, "–a friend, I'm here. Just give me a call or drop me a text or anything. I'm here... yeah. Bye."

Ending the call, I let out a deep breath and scrunched my face together, cursing at my stupidity. That could have gone a lot better, but it was done now. And I wasn't sure she'd take me up on my offer, but I felt better having put it out there anyway.

The rest of my day went on as normal, with me working and then waiting for Y/S/N to finish work so I had someone to hang out with. But when she texted me saying she'd be a bit late at the lab and to get dinner without her, my day got infinitely more boring and I began to scan some food delivery apps, hoping to find something good.

That's when I got a message notification from Lena, and I raised my eyebrows with surprise as I realised she'd texted me. Up until this point, when I hadn't heard from her since my lame voicemail, I was certain I'd screwed up and she'd just deleted it and moved on with her day. Maybe not.

Her text was simple and to the point, like they always had been. This one asked me if I could come over, with an address following it. The address wasn't familiar to me and I had to Google it to see what it was, and I saw it was an apartment building. The particular flat number she'd sent me happened to be a penthouse, and I put the facts together despite my surprise, realising she was inviting me to her home.

Stupid questions came to mind after I told her I'd be there, such as if she'd eaten or not, if she wanted me to pick anything up for her, if I was supposed to bring something. She hadn't been very clear, but I also didn't want to keep her waiting nor bombard her with dumb questions, so I got out of my pyjamas and put some jeans and a hoodie on before heading to hers. I made a pit stop at a takeaway, hoping she liked fish and chips since that's what I was in the mood for, and then went to her building.

It was massive, the pictures online not doing it justice. The whole of the entrance was covered with press, a group of them huddled and sat out in the dark, waiting with their cameras. I easily walked past them, since they had no interest in me or who I was, and headed inside to the front desk. All I had to say was my name and they let me straight up, apparently expecting me. I tried not to feel out of place as I was led to a lift in the back of the hall, button pressed for me to the penthouse at the top.

As I stood in the lift, feeling it take me up, I became acutely aware of how silly I felt. I'd offered my help to Lena, but had no idea what I would actually do or say. And I probably looked silly, too, realising I'd rushed to get out of Y/S/N's flat and pulled on a Super Mario hoodie. On top of that, I had no idea if Lena was hungry or not, and if she wasn't, why the hell was I showing up with the greasiest takeaway known to man? What was the plan – eat it in her kitchen as she watched?

"Fuck me," I mumbled, swallowing hard when the lift doors opened.

I probably should have thought this through more.

[babylooneytoonz]

the Other Lane.

pairing : Clark Kent x Reader

requested by: @dashingcavill [Hope you like this! 💛]

warnings: Angst with a happy ending, and a lot of fluff in the end.

A/N: Ah, I'm really sorry I couldn't help but put some major angst in here, but I swear the ending is happy and I added the right amount of feels and fluff to make it hurt less. 💛

[The Masterlist]

You often wondered if you were born to your parents only to become a commodity that could be compared to your sister, Lois , at all times. Yes, the two of you were different, she had glamourous blonde hair and sparkling blue irises that made her strike out, while you had sombre [Y/H/C] hair and dull [Y/E/C] eyes that peeked out from the tint of your glasses. If the glasses weren't enough to fit you perfectly into the category that was termed as 'nerds', the fact that you loved to bury yourself into mounds and mounds of books, and literature was sure to fit you into that bill. All that comparison, but that didn't lessen the bond that you shared with Lois though.

However, things slowly started changing, the dynamics messing up when Clark Kent came into your life, as a friend and as a colleague.

Lois worked as a reporter for Daily Planet, and you, well you were mostly working in the background, struggling to make a run with your tiny little column on relationship advises. It wasn't like you were any less intelligent, but maybe you just were okay with how everything was going.

It didn't mean that there weren't times at all when Lois made you secretly jealous. To be fair, it didn't bother you when you heard stories of how Lois got herself into trouble yet again, with none other than the Superman came to her rescue. You could still take that, considering the fact that Superman took his duty towards the civilians as his topmost priority, but when you began noticing obvious changes in your sister's behaviour when she talked to Clark, his alter ego; your colleague at work, you couldn't help but start feeling the little pangs of jealousy.

It all began subtly— starting from lingering glances at the workplace, to hands brushing with each other's, almost innocently, yet the two of them had a sparkle in their eyes when it did. At first, you decided to ignore them at work, trying your best to not run into Clark Kent while you were in your office building. The reason for this was still inexplicably strange for you. You didn't even know the man that well, yet you could do nothing in your control to keep your budding feelings for him under check. It was like, the more you avoided Clark Kent, the more you began aching to get a glimpse of him.

As the days passed, you realized that your crush on Clark was slowly getting more prominent, and you started feeling scared, dreading if there ever came a day that your secret crush on him with finally be out. To top it up a notch, you wondered how Lois will react, knowing well aware that there was something blooming between the two of them, although she had never admitted this to you herself. Also, you kept hoping that whatever this was, between Clark and Lois, it was maybe all in your head and that maybe, just maybe, it wasn't even true, and you hoped it wasn't.

Soon, days grew into weeks and weeks flew by as long months, and you realized that what you felt for Clark wasn't just a silly crush, but you were actually falling in love with the man. It was the littlest things that he did that made your heart melt. You would, sometimes, run into him in the cafeteria, where he would be filling up his mug of coffee. He was a gentleman, he would smile and greet you warmly, your eyes meeting his sparkling bright ones as he would move out of the way and insist that you went ahead first. You would often end up taking elevator rides with him, and he would make sweet small talks with you, talking to you about everything, ranging from the weather to a possible alien invasion.

The plan that you had cooked up to avoid Clark Kent went down the drain from those days onwards. Instead, you almost began running into Clark almost everyday. The gossips about Clark and Lois had, by then, died down and you couldn't help but feel relieved, relieved that maybe you had just been dreaming, and there was nothing between Lois and Clark.

"Hey [Y/N], can I borrow your turtleneck? I can't seem to find mine?"

You looked up from the book that you had been binge reading on, flustered and embarassed, as you immediately tossed the book unceremoniously into your blanket. Of course, you couldn't let your sister in on the fact that you were secretly reading the fifty shades series. She would tease the living hell out of you. And then there was the fact that you felt ashamed of the fact that you could practically imagine Clark Kent in your mind as Christian Grey, and it was making you all heated up and bothered.

Lois raised an eyebrow when she saw you red you had turned, "Are you okay? You look like a massive human sized tomato."

"Gee, Lois, thanks?" You mumbled, still reeling from the way she had suddenly barged into your bedroom, as you pushed your glasses over the bridge of your nose, "couldn't bother to knock?"

"Since when do we do these formalities?" She wiggled her eyebrows dramatically, and dashed towards your closet, throwing it open as her fingers began working through the hangers, looking for what she was looking for. She was practically messing up your closet, so you sighed and decided to give her a helping hand. Abruptly, you slid out of the covers, forgetting about the novel that you had hidden underneath and the novel suddenly slipped off the side of the bed and fell to the floor, it's covering full on display.

You facepalmed, burying your face into your hands as Lois walked up to the book and picked it up, smirking obviously as she read out the title out loud just to tease you.

"Looks like my baby sister is finally growing her wings."

"Stop it, Lois. Don't embarass me," you grumbled, looking away. Instead, you dashed up to your closet and pushed her to the side, roughly pulling out your turtleneck as you handed it to her.

"Come on, [Y/N]" she laughed, shaking her head, messing up her perfectly styled blonde waves as she ran a hand through them, "We all have done this. You're not the only one. Nothing to be embarassed about. It's not like you're watching porn."

"It is technically still porn if I'm reading it," you whispered, watching her as she examined the turtleneck and smiled, as though she had pictured just the best trousers to go with it in the back of her mind as she absentmindedly replied back, "Again, sis, we all have done it."

You noticed the way she kept glancing at her phone, with a smile threatening to spill across her features. You raised your eyebrows and smacked your lips together, blinking curiously. She finally looked up and saw that you were staring at her so she grinned, "Guess who has a date tonight?"

"A date?" You asked, absentmindedly.

"Clark asked me out, [Y/N]. He is taking me to this really good Thai place that opened up in the suburbs and I just couldn't decide on what to wear!! This will just go perfectly with my jeans."

It happened so suddenly, but it still did. You felt like someone had just ripped your gut out with bare hands. You suddenly felt empty, was an understatement. You suddenly felt strange and cut off, and everything around you suddenly felt cold and distant and gloomy. You looked up at her, your earlier warmth having dissipated into a cold, dark look and you gave her a smile, biting your lip, "That's great, Lois. Have fun."

Lois noticed the way your face fell, but she couldn't understand or take the hint. She kept watching as you moved away, turning your back towards her and didn't utter another word. She parted her lips, wanting to ask her what had gone wrong suddenly, but decided not to, or rather, keep the discussion for another time. She didn't want Clark to reach before she had even gotten ready. You didn't step out of your bedroom, that night when Lois returned from her date with Clark, and Lois frowned when she saw that the lights to your bedroom were already switched off. You were a late sleeper.

Two months later,

Lois looked up from the article that she had been reading to find you enter the dining room with a breakfast plate in your hand.

"Mornin'," you mumbled, your voice barely audible as you sat down on a chair in front of her, next to your father, Sam Lane. Your father looked up from the newspaper that he was reading, and glanced at Lois who shrugged her shoulders in response and he cleared the throat.

"Honey, don't you think you've been locking yourself up in your room for long now? When was the last time you actually did something that didn't involve either the bed, or your office desk?" The cutting crispness in his voice was enough to slice through your heart, but weirdly, you felt nothing, ecen when you heard Lois gasp and mumble something to her father in protest.

"What do you want me to do, dad?" You asked, sipping your juice, your eyes fixed to your plate.

Ignoring you, Sam turned towards his elder daughter as he narrowed his eyes at her, his loud, booming voice echoing through your house, "Lois, what the hell happened at work? She just quit? And didn't even give a damn valid reason as to what on earth happened?"

"I don't know, dad. She hardly talks to me anymore," Lois replied.

You chuckled dryly to yourself, wondering when you had become so invisible to the world. You were right there with them and yet they regarded you like you weren't even there.

"It was difficult to get you job at the Daily Planet and look at you, throwing it away for whatever the hell the reason was." Your dad barked.

Your fingers clenched into a fist and Lois visibly tensed. Hurriedly, she stood up and announced that she was leaving. You stood up too, but not for work, but rather to go back to the place that you had locked yourself in for the past two months. When you reached the door, you turned around and regarded your father, mumbling, "Why would you care anyway? You never really did before."

You kicked open your room door and slammed it back shut again as you ran straight for your bed. You were trembling like a leaf trying to detach itself from the tree when you buried your face into the pillow and screamed as loudly as you could into it. You were a mess, a walking , talking, living, breathing mess.

You cried, for almost thirty minutes, until you were out of tears. You then sat up and rubbed your eye sockets, finally taking a deep breath. You were letting Clark and Lois affect you so much, you had forgotten what it was like to live normally. How were you supposed to go on like this? If you wouldn't take a command of your own life again, then how would learn to get back up on your feet? When would you learn to accept that you would never get Clark? He wasn't the one for you.

Feelings are so transient, it's like you can feel them slicing through your insides one minute, and then the other minute, you feel unrealistically numb.

With those sorts of destructive thoughts in your mind, you sneaked a bottle of whiskey that night from your father's liquor cabinet at two am at night. You rolled the window pane and snuck out onto the fire escape until you were climbing up towards the roof the building of your apartment, the bottle in tow.

You fixed yourself on the ledge, using your teeth to twist the bottle cap as you took a swig of it, feeling the warm liquid burn your relentless thirst for relief. Sip after sip, you kept staring at the starless sky, mediating your gaze from the sky down to the glittery buildings.

"Will I ever forget you, Clark Kent?" You whispered, into the thin air, laughing bitterly at yourself as you took the last sip from the bottle before it rolled away. The way the lights glimmered in front of you, and one of two cars drove past your building, looking like tiny little blinking lights from the height you were at, you realized one thing. No matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

You were lost in a turbulence of your own thoughts, so entangled into them, you didn't hear the soft thud somewhere behind you, neither the sound of the faintest footsteps that got closer to you, with every passing second. You took a sharp breath, and slowly stepped over the ledge, feeling shudders all over your frame as the winds hit you all over you. You footing, however, slipped, a sharp scream erupting from your lips as you fell backwards against gravity, your heart almost stopping.

Someone suddenly reached out towards you, gripping your wrist, leaving you hanging from the ledge, your body flailing in the air.

He pulled you with a jerk towards you, and your body hit his front, your hair falling all over your face partially covering it. You felt intoxicated, so much, that you had almost died by falling off the building but you didn't feel the scare, the only thing you felt was a sudden surge of adrenaline.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Superman growled, through gritted teeth, his eyes sparkling as you jerked you by your shoulders.

"Clark? Is -- that you?!" You slurred, holding on to his cape tight to hold you in place. You were in a weird state of mind, you could see that it was him, but you couldn't figure out if it really was him, or if it was your mind that was playing an illusion on you.

"Are you trying to kill yourself?" Clark fumed, still holding on to you by the low of your back. He suddenly jumped off the ledge, with you in tow, away from the edge, so the two of you were in the middle of the roof now.

"K-Kill myself? No, I.. I.." You stammered, struggling for the right words but your brain felt frozen.

"Two months, and you don't show yourself. And when I finally see you, you're trying to jump off a fucking building?!" His eyes just then fell on the empty whiskey bottle. He growled, clenching his fists tight as he let go off you and walked up to the where the bottle lay, his cape flying behind him. He bent, lifting it up as he examined it, noticing how the neck of the bottle had your lipstick imprints on it. "And you're drunk. To top it up a notch."

Your nostrils flared in an anger you hadn't experienced ever before, your secret feelings finally crushing you completely, mixed with the alcohol that was rushing through your blood. You growled, like a cornered animal, that was wounded yet didn't want to back down. You pushed him, once, twice, throwing out all your pent up anger and frustration into his steely body like he felt no hurt. You screamed, you lashed, you scratched and you cried, finally coming undone, like beads of a rosary coming apart and scattering all over the floor.

Clark's heart broke at the sight of you. He had always seen you as a strong, happy woman, always smiling for him whenever he saw you at work. And this woman, that stood in front of his eyes right now, was far from it.

"I am not weak! I wouldn't kill myself! You give yourself too much importance, to think that someone would give their life for you!" You lashed out.

You were tired of hitting him like a punching bag. He grabbed you by your wrists, holding them together in front of you, pressed against his chest. He slowly moved, so he was towering over you, his back shielding you from unwanted, prying eyes as he gazed into your eyes, trying to find the answer to where all of this was coming from.

"You don't know what you're talking about. Come on, Lois is worried about you."

You couldn't stop yourself when your hand jerked itself free from his hold, and your palm struck his cheek. There was a crackling noise, of skin against skin, and tears formed in your eyes when the realisation hit you, all the intoxication washing off of you. You had just slapped Superman, a man that could snap your neck by grabbing your throat. Yet, he just stood there, too shocked to even register that you had slapped him right across his face and what was worse, he couldn't understand the reason you had done that. Anger was surfing through his veins, but worse than the anger that he was feeling, he was feeling like someone had pulled his heart out, ripping it to shreds right in front of his eyes.

"Why?" He let go off your other hand, his own palm coming to rest against his cheek as you gave you a look full of hurt.

"Why did you even save me, Clark? You should have let me fall. Atleast, it would have spared me the pain of listening to her name flow out of your lips again."

"Why do you hate her so much? She is your sister, [Y/N] and she cares for you. She worries that you're killing yourself and she doesn't know the reason why--" Clark was losing his temper, slowly but surely. He didn't understand you and that was eating him up.

"The reason why? WHY??! Oh Clark can you stop? And listen to yourself. I love Lois, but she needs to stop trying to govern my life. I'm allowed to feel sad, I'm allowed to feel a fucking heartbreak--" You didn't realise, but your lips were trembling now, your eyes leaking salty tears. You shivered when you felt Clark hold you by your shoulders but you didn't push his arms away.

"Who broke your heart?" He whispered, his voice cracking.

"You're fucking daft for a man who saves the world--" Hissing bitterly , you pushed yourself away from Clark's grip and turned towards the ledge but this time, you didn't try anything that would risk your life. You simply revelled in the cold feeling of the wind striking your tear stained face as you took a punctured breath, feeling Clark's breath on the side of your neck.

"Who broke your heart?" He asked again, but this time it was much softer, and it made you bite down on your lip to hold yourself from breaking into a hysterical crying.

"You did, Clark. You broke my heart." You finally whispered, staring into the abyss in front of you, your eyes cloudy and your throat parched as you continued, your lips trembling, "I loved you. Always did, but you never looked at me. It was always Lois. And it killed me, watching you love her, knowing that you will never love me the way you love her--" Clark let you speak, he wanted to listen to you, for you to let it all out, all those bitter things that you had locked up inside your mind, that was slowly eating you up and killing you from the inside. "I am tired of everyone, for you, for my father and for the world to see me as the Other Lane, as Lois Lane's little sister. My name is [Y/N]. I like to draw although I am shit at it, I can sing in the showers and I hate partying. That is me. I want a normal relationship too, but it seems that the world is against me. I fell in love with one man, and turns out, he isn't even human, he is a freaking superhero from Krypton?"

Clark let out a gruff sounding snort, as he looked down at you. Reluctantly, he reached for a strand of hair that was sticking to your tear coated cheek, removing it and gently tucking it behind your ear. He felt a shudder run down your spine, with just a gentle touch of his hand and he smiled, biting his lip. How was he supposed to tell you what the truth was?

"You remember how we met at the cafeteria every morning ? And I let you take the coffee?"

You nodded, listening to him, trying to control the crying that had now turned to sniffles, as Clark kept speaking.

"And the countless times I ran into that elevator with you and me stuck inside for just two floors?"

"You must have been thinking how weird I was. How unlike Lois--" You began, but you were cut off by Clark's voice.

"I used to wonder if there was anything I could do to make the elevators stop working, so I'd get to spend more time with you. Wretched elevators, not once did anything go according to what I wanted." He mumbled, but he had a small smile playing on his lips, while you just looked on, staring at him in disbelief, wondering if your mind was playing jokes with you once again.

"I thought I would take Lois' help, to you know, figure out if you felt the same way, but you never said anything to her."

"What about the date? Lois and you went on?" You asked.

"Well, I --" he shrug, looking down at his feet, sheepishly, " Lois thought you would confess how you felt for me if we pretended to--"

You were too numb to react; so you just blinked in retaliation. Your blood ran cold, and you suddenly felt light headed. All this while, while you had secretly been pining for Clark Kent to love you back, was it actually the other way round? Was Clark going through the same thing wondering if you felt the same for him?

"That was cowardly." You hissed, through pursed lips, "Trying to pretend to be in love with my sister."

"I was in love with the other Lane," he bit his lip, his face slightly inclined towards you, so he was looking down at you, and you up at him, "I think you are amazing. You are intelligent, and smart. And you're unique. There are these little things I adore about you. The way you greeted everyone whenever I was around-- ranging from the security guard, to the building keepers at the Daily Planet.. the way you forgot to wipe your lips after drinking coffee, and you had this froth all over your upper lip giving you a faint moustache?" He chuckled because you literally let out a gasp, suddenly embarassed.

"Then there were those days you had a bad day and you locked yourself up in your cabin, working all day. I wondered if I should just knock, but I was scared you will tell me off--" he continued, his blues peeking into yours. Your stomach fluttering, you couldn't help but laugh, as though a weight had been lifted off your chest suddenly and held him steady with your hand on his arm. Finally mustering enough courage, you pushed yourself on your toes, and reached up, letting your palm graze delicately over his cheek, caressing his cheekbone with your thumb, "I would have never told you off, Clark. Though that's not what is bothering me right now."

"What is ?" He asked, innocently, relaxing under the touch of your thumb.

"You said you're in love with the other Lane, Clark."

His lips creased, slowly tugging upwards into a smile that was enough to make you feel giddy. Superman wrapped a sturdy arm around you and felt yourself being lifted off, until he was practically holding you in his arms, "Mhm, yep? You got a problem, Miss Lane? Or do Kryptonians don't fit the bill ?"

"Oh, hush, Clark. You're such a dork. But will you be.. my dork?" You bit your lip, holding on to him as though your life depended on it.

"I thought... you'd never ask?" He began, unsure of how to properly weave the complexity of his feelings , churn them into words, something only Clark Kent was good at , and not his alter ego, but found himself halted by the soft press of your index finger against his lips and the sweet whisper of your voice against his ears as he held you close.

“I know, neither did I.” You whispered as he clasped your face in his massive hands and gently touched his lips to yours.

Three years later,

This had probably been the longest that Clark Kent had been away from you, his lover, his best friend, his wife-- four months to be exact. Needless to say, he was excited to be able to see you again, to hold you again.

The familiar silhouette of the cottage on top of the hill came into his view, flowers hanging into tiny earthen pots hanging out on the front porch. The freshly painted white picket fence looked beautiful, and inviting as Lois stood with Martha by the gate, both the ladies sipping tea from their respective cups and saucers. They couldn't contain their smiles when they saw Clark, even though he was covered in what looked like grime and blown up alien intestines?

"I don't even want to know what happened," Lois chuckled, while Martha hugged her son and he kissed the side of her cheek before she scrunched up her nose in disgust at how awful he smelled.

"Well, I guess I'll draw you a bath, you two can talk out here until the baths ready." Both Clark and Lois watched as Martha Kent disappeared into the home and he smiled, when Lois spoke again.

"FYI, she is at the orchard, harvesting the apples for an apple pie," Lois gave him a smug look, fluttering her lashes, "Oh don't pretend you don't want to see her. I can see your eyes darting around, trying to find her. I'll be inside, both of you, just come back in for supper."

He nodded, watching Lois leave and slowly, his fists clenched on either of his sides, he found his way into the tiny orchard that his lovely wife loved to spend most of her time at. He fixed himself by the wooden gate, his eyes admiring you from afar, as you stood on your tiptoes and picked out apples, tossing them into the basket that you held in your arm.

"Need help, Mrs. Kent?"

The basket dropped from your hand as you turned towards the source of the voice, your lips parted in shock. Clark's eyes travelled from you down to your beautiful swollen bump that your loose maternity dress was doing nothing to hide. He chuckled at your response as he walked towards you with longer, faster steps while you simply waddled towards him.

"Jesus, Clark-- I thought you'd miss the birth," you cupped your husband's cheeks in between your swollen fingers as he nuzzled his nose against yours, before kissing you.

"How is my monkey?" He brought his palm to rest against your nine month old baby bump, stroking over the fabric as he whispered against your lips.

"Moving around, not letting me get an ounce of sleep," you smiled, letting your fingers rest over his hand that rested against your stomach, "but I cant really complain now, can I? After all the little nugget's got Kryptonian blood running through their veins."

Clark chuckled, his blue eyes crinkling slightly as he knelt down in front of you, his face in line with the base of your bump as he planted a kiss on the curve of it.

"Come on, Kal Jr, will you stop bothering your mom? She needs all the sleep she can before you push your way into the world and steal our goodnight sleeps for a while," you smiled warmly, as you peered down at him, running your fingers through his hair and he looked up at you, planting another kiss against your bump.

You suddenly frowned and looked at the brown mess on your fingers that stank.

"God, Clark? What the hell? Did you seriously take a dive in a shit pool?"

He chuckled as he pulled himself up again and his hand once again found the base of your stomach to lay his hand protectively upon.

"Alien blood. You should have seen the intestines that covered me. It looked like noddles dipped in black bean sauce and meatballs--" You smacked him hard against the chest to shut him up, but instead he began laughing, his laughter rumbling out of his stomach as you began dragging him inside with his stained cape.

[liptonsbabe]

Chains of a family [B.W]

Bill Weasley x Grant! reader

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Summary: Molly thinks that Bill’s and the reader relationship is a mistake so she wants them apart from each other. Bill’s against his mother wishes and he find a way to drag the reader into the Weasley family officialy

Word count: 1.9K

Warnings: none

A/N: Hi! Part 4 of this thing lol. I’m so happy that you guys like this story. It’ll have like 20 chapters or so, i’m still deciding that so yeah, that’s pretty much the thing. Btw, from now on chapters will be more interestings... i hope so lol. Again, english not my mother language. Please let me know if something’s wrong. Aaaaaand if you want to be tagged in the next chapters tell me and i will add you! Enjoy!

Chapter 4: Arguments

The rest of the afternoon passed as normal as the days before your arrival. Arthur Weasley made sure of it. Even if Molly attacked you with her dagger gaze when you and Bill hugged each other after you were done with dessert.

You didn’t know what Mr. Weasley had talked about with his wife while you were taking a shower, however, you noticed the tension rising from their bodies after you sat down at the table next to Bill and saw an annoyance sign on Molly’s lips. Her temple was frowned, reminding you of your own mother's gestures. Those flaming eyes, cleft chin, and pinion lips. Both women contract their features too much when they were upset and in your distress, you knew that they must not be disturbed.

The last thing you wanted was to hurt a marriage as solid as the Weasley's. More than once you heard your mother talk about it with your nanny making a powerful emphasis on how Molly and Arthur were able to carry out their marriage even if their economic conditions were precarious and the war was on their heels. They were an envied couple. Few dared to expand the family as much as they did without money in their pockets and spreading their progeny like a plague. No one was surprised, not even your mother, not when her marriage to Evan Grant was merely for financial advantage. Now Arthur and Molly looked upset, too upset for your understanding and you just hoped they could get along soon.

You weren't sure you deserved the sacrifice Bill's father had made for you, yet a flame of hope lit up in your chest. If Mr. Weasley started to trust you that was a good sign for others to do as well, right?

The afternoon continued as normal, seeing how Bill's plans to distract you from the fervent harassment of his mother was marred by the twins intervention. They had just finished a new product for their store and needed a good taster to certify the quality of their merchandise. It was a bad idea, he told himself, because twins were just a disaster and you didn't know them well enough to deny their good-natured pretensions.

"Be kind!" He yelled at them as Fred and George pulled you into their. Bill exhaled, pleading that his brothers wouldn't bother his girlfriend more than his mother already had.

Before taking you home, he thought about the pros and cons of your stay in the burrow. His conclusion was based on the fact that his entire family welcomed Harry Potter with open arms, so you didn't have to be the exception. He knew the difference in conditions in which his theory developed, yet he put his trust in the good judgment of his family even if the Grants' past left much to be desired. Bill didn't talk much about you with his mother, in fact, your presence at home was the last of his worries, the real problem came at the time of joining the Order of the Phoenix, would you be willing to fight against your relatives even if that mean betraying your own blood? Bill hope you will

Coming downstairs, Bill found his mother storing the leftover food in the fridge while the dishes soaked in the sink. Then he watched her clean each plate with her bare hands, no magic. William knew his anger was real.

"Want some help with that?"

"I'd love to, honey, thank you," his mother answered without looking at him. Bill raised the sleeves of his shirt to his elbows, dipping his hands into the tide of water and bubbles that flew across the kitchen. Molly was silent, drying the dishes and flying them to her place in the display case across the kitchen. Bill cleared his throat doubtfully "It never hurts to help, much less when I have so many things to do before the rest of the Order arrive"

"Don't worry, I'll help you with that too."

"Perfect"

"Mom, can we talk?"

"About what?

"You know what," Bill clicked his tongue, passing her the last plate from the sink to continue with the spoons. "(Y/N)..."

"Your father has scolded me enough about that girl, I don't need you to do it too"

"I wouldn't if you had a little consideration with her."

"More consideration?" Molly asked in a squeak. Bill shook his head. "I'm letting her stay at my home!"

"Our home, mom, ours," he corrected, drying his hands with a cloth. "This house also belongs to my dad, my brothers, and me. It's the burrow, a family property, not a secret club where some people can get in and others cannot."

"You know what I think of her"

"And you know I don't care." Molly looked scandalized at her son. She didn't understand what he had seen in someone like you or what you had given him to come out and defend you as he did "I don't ask you to love her, but at least you have to try...

"Have you ever wondered what will happen when she betrays us?"

"That's not gonna happen"

"You're very sure of that, William"

"I'm convinced, Mom. You don't know her like I do and, you know what? I see that wanting to talk to you was a mistake"

"Moody thinks like me," Molly stopped him when Bill was ready to go upstairs. The woman clung to the railing watching her son standing in the first step out of the kitchen "(Y/N) Grant is a danger to the Order"

"Really? Like Mundungus Fletcher? I beg your pardon, mom, but if there is anyone who represents a latent danger to the Order of the Phoenix, it's him and yet you have assigned him for the mission tonight"

Molly's lips parted and if it weren't for the fact that Bill knew her mother too well, he might think the woman was about to throw herself on the floor in a tantrum. Still, she clenched the bars tightly, her brow furrowed, and the redness on her cheeks washed over her forehead.

"William!" Don't talk to me like that!"

"I wouldn't if you had a little more respect for my girlfriend."

"Don't you understand? I care about you! For all of us!" She snarled angrily. "Having a Riddle in this house..."

"A Grant, mom, (Y/N) is a Grant and that's not the same." Bill descended his steps, approaching her mother, returning that angry look that she had inherited from him. It was a strange sensation. A dyad of emotions between joy and fear where the composed emotion was guilt. He had never exploded that way with his mother, but Molly hadn't behaved that way with anyone either "His grandfather is Lord Voldemort's half-brother and his brothers are all Death Eaters, what does it matter? (Y/N) is not. And when do we judge others by where they come from? If so, we could start with half of us. Being a Weasley is equivalent to being a blood traitor"

"William!"

Molly's face went from fury to shock to fury again. Bill's eyes were twinkling and Molly swore she had never seen any of her children this angry, or worse, this determined.

"What would you have done, Mom?" Bill questioned taking his mother by his arms in an attempt to make him feel her despair. Molly opened her eyes, scared. "When your family tell you not to accept dad? When your brothers object to your engagement, just 'cause the Weasleys have long been considered blood traitors?"

For the first time that day Molly's mind went blank, Bill guessed, rewinding the memories of how difficult it was for the Prewetts to accept the marriage. Bill pleaded silently, but pulled away from her when his mother gave no indication to be a little more respectful with you.

"We aren't like that. We don't separate people by where they come from, we hug them" Bill resumed his way towards the stairs, stopping a couple of steps up, turning to take a look at Molly's stunned figure "As you did with Hermione, Remus and Harry when you and Dad became his godparents after Sirius died. (Y/N) is no different"

"She will turn her back on us when the Order fight the Grants. That moment will come and you know it"

"Don't worry, i'll make sure that doesn't happen"

"She is not part of this family"

"That can be solved very easily," he said and the smile he wore gave her a terrible chill down her spine. "Because I'm going to ask her to be my wife."

Molly's gasp was the only thing Bill heard before climbing the stairs and heading to the twins' room. He always respected his mother a lot and even thinking of opposing to her wishes was inconceivable, but your well-being was something that was involved and Bill couldn't just let her mother control his life at her will. Maybe the mistake he made was not telling his parents the truth about you from the start or, in that case, mentioning that the woman he loved was the fucking niece of the strongest fucking dark wizard of all time.

Bill Weasley rubbed his face as he reached the twins' door. He no longer had to torment himself, it was done and the only thing pending at the moment was to get Harry out of his uncles' house, take him safely to the burrow and find the courage to do what he told his mother he would do.

Would you agree to marry him? He hoped so and if not, he wouldn't pressure you. You were young - even a little younger than him - and it would be understandable if you refused to tie your life to someone else's from one moment to the other. The war progressed every day and if you were going to do it, you would do it as soon as possible.

Loud laughings brought him out of his thoughts to observe you and his brothers sitting on the floor, right in the center of both beds, laughing at each other and touching your faces. From the doorway Bill can't see the full painted room, however George's face showed a rather abstract mural full of bright colors when he felt the presence of his older brother. Fred did the same showing his face in the same situation and then you turned to Bill, still laughing and your face smeared with paint. It seemed the twins had created a paint bomb in millimeter pills, that explode when you put a little bit of pressure. You tried to clean yourself with the sleeve of your sweater but you spread the paint even more. Fred and George laughed and so did Bill.

His heart swelled with love as he saw that at least someone in his family - besides him and his father - had hope in you. God, he may have even cried with happiness.

Bill never understood how a sunshine as beautiful as you was never accepted in your entire life.

Tags:

@purple-vodka-99

@vampirestrawberries

Thanks for the 100 followers!❤