#also need to make the next update post so I can actually show when Salty shows up

[nightly-ruse]

Okay how reasonable would a cat with snakebites be?

[ilooklikeaburntchickenugget]

Hi, I love your writing. I really want to make a request where the readers have eating disorder but works in the modeling industries. She is like dating Gerard, but they were in a super big fight because of her eating disorder, as well as her constant traveling for fashion weeks, and at the end, they make up, and Gerard is helping her getting better, and stuff like that. I really love your writing, can you please write one? THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

Title: Poisons A/N: I actually got two requests for something like these. The endings for both requests were slightly different, but here’s the first one. I didn’t really edit it, just because I haven’t updated much content in forever, but here you go! Pairing: Gerard Way (probably late Black Parade era) x Model!F!Reader Word count: 3,170 Warnings: Eating disorder, swearing, angst, drama, there’s just a lot.

Okay, so this was not what Gerard expected to come home to.

The man expected to go back to his New York apartment, shared with his gorgeous girlfriend, and for everything to be perfect. Well maybe not perfect, but perfect in Gerard’s mind.

He wanted nothing more than to just eat some chips, not having eaten in 16 hours due to his flight and partial distaste to airplane food, and curl up with his girlfriend, hugging every inch of her curves.

Instead he came home to a house that was nearly empty of any food, only a few protein shakes resided in the large fridge. This was already a huge warning sign Gerard looked out for. His mind attempted to justify itself, thinking that maybe he was jumping to the worst of the worst conclusions. No, you were probably just traveling so much that you weren’t at home enough to actually buy food.

He sighed, moving to one of the cabinets he knew the take out menus were hidden in. Opening it up, he picked up one of the cheap paper menus covered in dust, shaking it with his hand to get it off. Great, these hadn’t been touched in months.

After debating mentally between Chinese and Italian, he moved to your bedroom, in hopes to finally see the love of his life after months of being absent on tour. There you were, peacefully sleeping in bed. Jetlag, he knew.

He carefully removed his shoes, moving to his closet to change his airplane clothes to more comfortable ones. Climbing into the warm bed beside you, he placed his hands on your hips as he always had. His initial smile soon turned into a frown.

Even under the large hoodie you were wearing he could feel the painful outlines of your ribs. Grimacing to himself, he heard a small sigh fall from your lips. “Gee?” You coarsely called out.

“Mhm,” He hummed back, kissing the top of your head despite the pure disappointment towards you that coarse through his veins.

“What’re you doing? Weren’t you supposed to be gone for another week?” You asked again, still half asleep.

“The guys and I decided to cancel the last week where we were just supposed to travel, I missed you too much.” He smiled lightly, moving your hair to the side to kiss your neck.

“Mmm,” You hummed quietly, your consciousness growing back. Within seconds realization hit you, your eyes internally going wide, not wanting to show anything to Gerard, and you pulled away from him slightly.

“Babe,” He sighed, “We’re not doing this again.” “Doing what again?” You tried to pretend to not understand what he was saying.

“You’re a gorgeous, talented model,” He began with a soft smile, “But don’t go into acting, you’re not good at it.” “Gee, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You fired back.

“Take off your hoodie,” He insisted, “Now.” “Gerard, what the fuck?” You scoffed, “Take off my hoodie?” “You heard me,” He stated, “Take it off.” “Why would I take it off?” You scrowled.

“So I can confirm that you haven’t been eating like you’re supposed to.”

“Gerard, please-” You begged, now falling off your pedestal of lies. He sighed heavily, rolling his eyes.

“Why haven’t you?” He asked, looking at you, “What has caused you not to eat again? I thought we were over this.”

“I don’t think that’s your problem.” You snapped. You rarely if ever did so, but this was only further confirmation that you hadn’t eaten in a couple of days. You were cranky.

“Damn right it is my problem.” He sat up next to you, his face had gone completely serious. There were traces of anger in his eyes, his pulsing veins along his muscular arms told you all you needed to know. He wasn’t only infuriated with your habit, he was disappointed.

A word you hated. You absolutely hated. The way it sounded, the meaning, how it made you feel. “Please,” You begged him, your once bright eyes gray from the torture you had put yourself through. “Please what?” He asked, his tone still somewhat harsh.

“Just don’t be mad.” You pleaded. You could see his eyes scan over your face, looking for any signs that you were lying. He found none.

Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes to clear his head he nodded lightly. “Alright,” He said barely letting out a breath, “But you need to tell me everything.”

And you did. Most of it at least. You explained how your insecurities resettled themselves in your mind, starting the moment he left for Tour. You talked about how you were getting more gigs and all due to your tinier size. You explained how skin and bones was basically the new trend.

He sat and listened to you. And he believed it, because he knew it was true. But naturally, he also was a human lie detector. Especially with you.

“Okay,” He began, “And what else?” So maybe that one small part your left out was something that you really didn’t want to admit. Gerard had this strong distaste for most of your model “friends”, ya know, the ones who are naturally tiny and eat salads 24/7, never genuinely enjoying a single meal. The one’s who flashed their designer shit everywhere they went, who posted bikini photos every other day and managed to somehow photoshop themselves into complete Barbie dolls. It made Gerard’s blood boil, he never liked you hanging out with them. Because are them you were not Y/N, you couldn’t be. And that made you even more secure.

“There’s nothing else.” You lied. He looked you in the eyes, waiting another moment.

“I’m gonna give you one more chance to tell me the truth,” He sighed, “What else?” “I said nothing.” Your tone was adamant. He rolled his eyes in disbelief.

“You lied to me,” He began, “You just fucking lied to me. We’ve been over this how many times?” “I didn’t fucking lie to you,” You stuck up for yourself, moving further away from him.

“Another lie, damn Y/N.” He sighed, “We’ve been dating for three years, and you still can’t trust me.” “I do trust you, Gerard.” “Then why are you lying to me?” He asked, his tone going to a much harsher pitch.

“Ya know what?” You said, grabbing your pillow violently, getting up from the bed, Gerard looking at you with no emotion. “Fuck you.” You stated.

“Are you seriously gonna leave?” He asked, rolling his eyes, “Immature.” “No, I’m going to the fucking couch where I don’t have to sleep next to a complete dick.” You fired back, going into your closet and grabbing a spare blanket. “You didn’t mean that.” He scoffed.

“Then why the fuck did I say it?” You marched out of the bedroom, flipping him off to which you heard a sarcastic laugh.

This was far from how you had planned his return. You were gonna stock the fridge and pantry, ya know, not give him a chance to think you weren’t eating, and probably have dinner made. You would eat a small portion, making the excuse you had a big lunch with your friends, and bam! Everything would be okay.

But naturally, shit didn’t work out and after numerous insults thrown at each other you found yourself on the couch silently sobbing. You and Gerard had never gone that far, ever. This fight was beyond messy, it was a complete dumpster fire.

You wanted no more than to apologize to him, but you also wanted an apology from him. You should’ve told him everything, that was on you. But he pushed your buttons and he knew what he was doing. It only took 15 minutes, before you heard his soft footsteps coming from the bedroom, and his warm arms wrapping around you, to which his shoulder became one to cry on. His slow and soft coos calming you down, as he began apologizing over and over again, clearly more mad at himself at this point. “Sugar, I’m so so sorry,” He apologized, “I was just really upset.” “I know,” You sniffled, “I’m sorry too. I shouldn’t have called you a dick.” You looked up at him. “Well, I was kinda being one.” He lightly smiled, to which you giggled in his chest. “Just promise me, you’ll start eating again.” “Gee-” You were about to make an excuse when you were interrupted.

“Babe, you have to.” He began, “Remember what your manager said last time?” You sighed, remembering. Yep, they would place you right in a psych ward. “So here’s what’s gonna happen. We’re not gonna tell anyone, but I need you to start eating, okay? We’ll go gradually, start small and build up. Together, okay?” You nodded, placing you head on his shoulder.

“I love you,” You smiled, looking up at him. “I love you too.” He smiled right back down.

-Six months later-

"Gee, that’s too much salt!” You scolded as he put a tablespoon of salt not a teaspoon into the cookie dough you were making.

“Oops.” He looked down to which you smiled lightly. You took a chunk of it placing it into your mouth, and he did the same. You couldn’t help but gag at how much salt was in it. “Salty.” He admitted, and you lightly nudged him.

“Yeah, ya dork.” You smiled. “That’s what happens when you add too much salt.” He lightly laughed, wrapping his hands around your waist from behind and placing his head on your shoulder.

“So what’re we gonna do to fix it.” “Nothing,” You said, “We could like, triple the batch, but that would be way too much.”

“Don’t forget we’re seeing the guys tonight,” He smiled, “They’re gonna eat this shit up.” You sighed, nodding.

“Maybe it isn’t such a bad idea after all.” The two of you spent the next half hour adding more of every ingredient, thankful that your apartment was stocked with food to use.

Carefully, you placed as many trays as you could into the oven, closing it and setting the timer. Giving Gerard a quick peck on the lips, he went off to review some emails as you checked your phone. Of course, the group chat was buzzing.

You sighed as you open the text chain reluctantly, scrolling through only to see your name pop up numerous times. “Y/N, where have you been?” “Yeah, fr, we have been out to lunch with you in forever.” “Why are you ignoring us?” “Really? Now you’re being a fake friend.” “Guys, I’m okay.” You simply responded, “Just really busy.”

“Uh huh, you’ve been doing boutique stuff for months.” “Literally nothing even big.” “Not since that Prada show.” “It’s Gerard, isn’t it.”

And just like that, you were about to light these girls up. Gerard was the only one willing, and quite frankly able, to get you out of the huge hole you had dug yourself into. And damn, now these bitches (I hate misogynistic terms against women, but I think it may fit here) were really gonna act like the good guys. “Don’t bring Gerard into this.” You simply responded. “It has to be him.” “He’s not even worth it.” “You could have any guy in the world, and you chose him.” “He’s way out of your league, and you’re still on your knees for him. Smh.” You knew damn well they were trying to get to you. None of these girls had had any true romance, only summer flings with football players, actors, and singers. Granted, Gerard was a singer, but he made good music. He was an artist at his core, singing was just apart of that art. It didn’t take you more than a moment to remove yourself from the group chat, and block all those girls. The real fake friends. The timer went off, which startled you a bit, but placing your phone down with a heavy sigh, you turned it off, to check out the cookies. The top row was done, which you were going to take out. Naturally, the tsunami of inappropriate texts from who you would once call your “girlfriends” was still flooded in your mind, and like a complete idiot, you reached in, touching and grabbing the sheet. With you bare hands.

“Shit!” You yelped, dropping the pan on the open oven and rushing to put your hand under cold water.

“Y/N?” You heard Gerard rush in. You looked up at him, and judging your hand under water, and the cookie sheet which had clearly gone through it, he took a slight sigh, first going to examine your hand. “You alright?” You nodded despite the tears forming in your eyes.

It wasn’t even the burn that hurt. It was the fact that you knew you let those girls get to you so easily, and the just embarrassed yourself in front of Gerard. You knew he didn’t find it embarrassing at all, it was an honest mistake. But still, it embarrassed the shit out of you. “Baby,” He cooed, moving your head up with his fingers under your chin to see the tears that were now slowly cascading down your red cheeks, “It’s okay.” He said lightly. You nodded, placing your head into his chest and sniffling a bit. “What happened.” “I was just distracted,” You admitted, “Forgot the oven mitt.” He nodded, holding you for a moment longer before he knew you were okay, and going to pick up the mess. “Gee, I can clean it up, I made it-” “No, no, please, just worry about your hand, okay, sugar?” You nodded, attending back to it.

The bright red mark across your hand didn’t want to budge, which you were fine with, considering it didn’t hurt as much, just stung a bit. He managed to clean up all the cookies pretty fast, putting them on the stove top to cool, and quickly going back to you. Giving you a kiss on the top of your head, it was his way of messaging he didn’t want to push the topic. But if you wanted to talk he’d be there to listen. It wasn’t but a few hours later that the guys came over. The mistake from earlier was long forgotten, other than the mark on your hand.

The guys were honestly some of your best friends, just like they were Gerard’s. They truly cared about you, just as much if not more than you cared about them. All of them knew about your struggles, and they were honestly your number one cheerleaders.

So the looks on their faces when they saw you healthy again was one that you could not pay for. It was definitely a lot of pride in you for doing it, and it made you feel even better about your decision to get healthy again.

Honestly, you loved the relaxes atmosphere of just hanging out. Sitting next to Gerard with some water, as he drank a Diet Coke, and some of the guys had beers, some opted otherwise. You could theoretically drink as well, but you didn’t want your boyfriend to ever feel alone or strange not drinking alcohol, considering his rough past with it. So you typically opted for a non alcoholic beverage.

It wasn’t until after the guys were gone and you were in the shower that Gerard figured out what was wrong. Your phone kept buzzing, going off constantly. He had never once checked your phone without your permission. There was a huge element of trust in your relationship, and he never felt that there was a reason to. He knew your passcode, you two had openly shared each others in the case one of you needed to use the others phone, but when he picked up yours and saw all those girls name pop up he scoffed.

He knew he probably shouldn’t have done it, but he opened your phone, scrolling through the messages. Some of them you had yet to block, and they were obnoxious. He went into the group chat where the messages were flooding, reading from the beginning of the day until now.

Pissed was an absolute understatement. If it wasn’t for the sound of the shower you were in keeping him aware of his surrounding, he probably would have smashed your phone. Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes, he placed it face down on the counter right where it was, resorting back to your bedroom in some hope of calming down before you got out, not making anything too obvious.

Everything was fine, completely normal. The two of you laying in bed together, doing your typical night time routine of reading a bit, maybe watching something, it really depended. You could feel how tense Gerard was, even by your head just leaning on his shoulder. His muscles flexed together, twisted into tight knots. You weren’t sure what had him so stressed, there wasn’t a need for him to be, right? “Babe?” You asked, to which he quietly hummed, “Are you alright?” You had caught on quickly, like you always had. And now he had cursed himself for looking at those messages. Transparency, he remembered, transparency.

“Honestly,” He sighed putting his book down, “I- I- I saw those messages.” He stumbled on his own words. You gave him a confused look, “The ones the girls sent.” You let out a sigh. Oh shit, he thought, thinking the worst of the worst. “Please don’t listen to them,” You insisted, “You know you’re not the reason for any problem in my life?” “Of course not,” He scoffed, “You’re totally fine. It’s just, how they treated you that bothered me.” “Gee-” “Y/N, we’ve talked about this.” He turned to you, “I’m not a controlling person, I try my hardest not to be. But damn, those girls are complete poisons. They’re hurting you, they’re doing far more harm than good. And I hope that doesn’t make me sound like a manipulator or anything, but even you’ve admitted you’re a lot different around them.” You sighed and nodded.

“I know, I just-” You began, “I’ve spent so many years of my life surrounding myself with people like them that it’s hard for me to know what to do without that, ya know?” He nodded.

“You don’t need a bunch of model friends thought to still be a great model.” You nodded.

“I’ll cut everything off with them in the morning, okay?” “Babe, you don’t need to rush it,” He said, “I mean, sure, the sooner the better, but this is your timing okay?” You nodded.

“Do you think everything will be okay?” You asked him next.

“Well, after they very possibly blame you for everything over text and try to put you down a psychological spiral, because that’s what they do, then yes, everything should be okay.” He smiled to which you nudged him. “You’re making this so much easier.” You sarcastically said, “I don’t even know why I ask you.” “Because you love me.”

[meimae]

Look at me, not being on time for my April Immersion Overview as is the usual. (・w・;

First, little blog updates to get out of the way:

I reached 100 followers! Got an influx of people checking out my 1 year update post, and got plenty of nice compliments on my data collection.

For those of you wondering just why I keep up with so much data, it's mostly because it can get really hard to notice how much you're improving in a language especially with something like immersion learning that for people who don't get it feels like a waste of time or a time sink.

Graphs showing consistency, improvement in reading speed, increasing vocabulary counts, and generally just seeing numbers grow turns language learning more fun and motivating for me, and if as a bonus, it encourages someone to try immersion learning then that would be cool!

With that said, whether you're here as a fellow language learner, graphs enthusiast (笑), or just want some Japanese media recommendations, ようこそ! 

Also, made a tiny DP change - it’s チト from 少女週末旅行. Pretty sure it’s the first manga series I ever finished in Japanese (not the first one I started since ちはやふる is still ongoing), and I always felt a bit of a ☆connection☆ with  her - between her book-loving personality and being a no-nonsense kind of person, there was no way for me not to enjoy her character. Great beginner anime/manga if you’re not into most beginner recommendations.

-☆-

April has been a pretty good immersion month, as I was able to dip my toes in a variety of media. A bit competitive, too! The club I joined has been pulling all the stops to get to the Top 20 Immersion Leaderboard in it’s first month. I was able to snag the 9th spot among a bunch of people of different comprehension levels (the majority being N1+ since they’re able to comprehend much more and in turn stand longer immersion hours). Lots of tiny complaints though of potential “whitenoising” content (”listening” and “reading” but not comprehending very well just to get a large number to post), but really what can you do? People lie all the time on the internet. Besides, it’s internet points that doesn’t do anything beyond being a little shiny I guess.

Enough about that, let’s get into the nitty-gritty details you came here for!

ANIME

フルーツバスケット

Might need to rewatch this one. Felt like I didn’t connect with the characters the way the rest of its fandom has. I’m kinda sad about it, since I normally love Slice of Life and Fantasy, and I know this is one of my friend’s diehard shows.

ラブライブ! School Idol Project S2

A filler anime to watch tbh. Nice and easy enough to follow for beginners. Pretty good songs. With regards to it being a show about music and moe, I still 100% prefer K-On! if I’m going to be honest, but for a show about non-toxic idols, it’s good!

魔法少女まどか☆マギカ

First read this as English translated manga when I was 13 or something. Mistakes were made. Let’s all just agree to throw キュウベえ into a pit of fire and never talk about it again. Great ending and a show that really reworked the magical girl genre. But seriously, I was traumatized by マミ’s death then and now, help.

四月は君の嘘

Already knew what was going to happen even before watching this so I didn’t ugly cry like I was expecting. Still got that awful sinking feeling though. 10/10 would recommend for a good cry. Also, I’m planning to read the manga, might enjoy that more, because I’ve always liked it more than anime actually. *shocked pikachu face*

ホリミヤ

Watched before I even finished the manga which felt like a mistake at first until I realized that it perfectly stops where I stopped reading. Nice and comfy anime, the kind I would have loved as a teen. Fun animation too, making parts very dramatic even though it wasn’t really that deep of an issue even in the manga. Just teens feeling feelings. Still salty that we lose bad boy styled 宮村, but I get why it had to happen.

AUDIOBOOKS

氷菓

Second re-listen. I understand it fine, but it’s very easy to drift off when you can’t catch all the words so I had to replay often. Will have to mine more from the anime/book.

君の名は

I mined from the anime, and was really pleased to be able to follow all 6 hours of this audiobook perfectly fine. Will need to read the book, because I realized just how seamless reading it would be after listening to it with hardly any issue.

BOOKS

キッチェン

Completed! Read my thoughts about it and see my stats on this post.

君の膵臓を食べたい

Still trudging on with this one. It’s not a bad story, it’s pretty well written actually, I just made the mistake of watching both the anime and live adaptation first, so I know exactly what’s going to happen and it’s killing my motivation to keep reading. I guess reading the book first before watching the movie still applies in any language with me. Really need to 頑張れ and finish so I can move on. 

三日間の幸福

Started reading towards the end of the month, mostly because I realized that every chapter is only 5000-15000 characters long, and I was able to read up to 40k in a day with Island most days. Only two chapters read so far though because I got distracted by manga, but it’s shaping up to be a really good plot and potentially a really sad one, too, so I’m interested.

DRAMA

花ざかりの君たちへ イケメンパラダイス

Heard this was a classic so I gave it a try. Loved 生田 斗真’s character in this one the most especially all his internal dialogue acted out. Also, 小栗 旬 in anything is bound to be a good watch. Simple and fun watch. They dragged the ending so much though lmao 

ごくせん

Look, I see 松本 潤, I click. Definitely the kind of show you should watch for some great life advice. Planning to watch the 2nd and 3rd seasons even if there is a terrible lack of 松本 潤, because I love my strong female protagonists, and man, ヤンクミ is such a great character. Need to read the manga, too, if I can find it.

極主夫道

Oof, this was kind of hard. The yakuza talk was throwing me off, but the rest of it was enjoyable. Not really plot heavy as I thought it was going to be. The comedy side of it was fun and predictable after the first few episodes. Overall, pretty good slice of life, family story with a twist.

MANGA

Read a bunch of manga this month, mostly because I am struggling to find the next vn to read.

おやすみプンプン

Read a couple of volumes (6-7). This manga is so good, but it’s so depressing I need to stop to take a breather every once in a while. Please don’t leave any spoilers. The club has been reacting to me reading this, and it has mostly been a lot of crying emotes. It’s both been enjoyable to see and really worrying. 笑

チェンソーマン

Club recommendation. Only read the 1st volume so far. I really need to get into more 少年 anime/manga. That’s currently my 苦手 genre which is awful because literally all the top anime/manga is 少年 help. I just can’t enjoy it much still even though it’s comprehensible to me.

ちはやふる 中学生編

Read Vol. 1, chill read to me at this point after reading 45 volumes of the regular manga. Look, it’s my favorite 幼馴染 manga in baby format, of course I’m going to read this! 太一 has been a flake way before season 3 confirmed. Don’t come at me たいちはや stans bc I also like his character.

約束のネバーランド

Volume 7. I’m taking my sweet time with this one, because I heard the anime for season 2 sucked, so I’m avoiding it like the plague. This is 少年 how am I enjoying this and not everything else what.

ヲタクに恋は難しい

Enjoyed the anime hated the movie why did they make it a musical that sucked (ps i normally love musicals hated this one) 

The オタク jargon is kinda hard to read suprisingly but I do enjoy this ship very much. It’s a lighthearted take to otaku culture which is great because seriously it’s scary out there.

ツバサ -RESERVoir CHRoNiCLE-

It’s my childhood ship, obviously I will read this again (read in English several years ago). Still as plot twisty as I remember it being (now at a bonus hard level reading it in Japanese 笑). Really enjoyed reading this one (I finished it this May).

-☆-

I’m starting to really dislike furigana in manga. It was a great help as a beginner, but now it’s like training wheels that you can’t take off. I feel like the gains I’m getting from manga is much lower than it was when I first started which makes me both proud of how far I’ve come, but also sad because I love manga. Sad that I might have to start choose VNs over it, because it’s not going to challenge me as much going forward. I mean it didn’t stop me from reading a lot of it this month, but you get the picture.

VISUAL NOVELS

ISLAND

Completed! See my stats and read my long spoiler filled post here.

ファタモルガーナの館

Picked up this VN and finished two doors (15 hours) before stopping. On the fence about it, because it has been kind of predictable so far, and I don’t particularly enjoy the horror genre. That said, this is more psychological than anything, so it’s probably not that that’s putting me off. The language is not exactly difficult, too - maybe some oddly specific words because it is after all historical fiction (which is one of my favorite genres, btw), and 敬語 is definitely interesting to read for once after encountering so many お嬢様 characters in anime/drama so far. 

I think maybe it’s the conversations that are kind of dull - dots (silence) every few clicks that keeps breaking the flow of reading. Probably judging it really harshly too early, because it’s rated so high everywhere, and I just have high expectations. Definitely not dropping it yet though, just taking a break and testing a couple of other VNs before I settle with whatever I end up choosing. It is, after all, going to be another 50+ hour read, and I just don’t want to not enjoy the process, because having fun with the process is a huge part of immersion learning.

Let me know if you’ve read Fata and if I should continue! 

-☆-

That’s it for this month!

If you have any suggestions on what to watch and read next, please send me a reply, especially for VNs because I’m struggling over here.

[allbrainrot]

Aaaa could you do ❤️ for pre and post time skip Dimitri? 👉🏻🥺👈🏻 ty!! I love your writing style and I’m so excited to see what else you come up with!!

YES I LOVE DIMI SO MUCH!! I’m so glad that people like my prompts and writing 😭🖤 Thank you anon for allowing me to write about post timeskip Dimi’s massive cape that shit is the best lmao ✨

Pre Timeskip:

- Pre timeskip Dimitri is very special at displays of affection..*cough* dagger *cough*..so he’d be so easily flustered, but he’d appreciate any form of love you’re willing to give him nonetheless.

- For this particular instance, I’m thinking reader is a Golden Deer, so they have to be separated during each classes’ missions a lot. As a traumatized individual with few loved ones left, I can imagine that Dimitri would become somewhat clingy with anxiety once you grow close to him. As his partner, you’re very used to always being beside him to comfort and reassure him, so it’d be a pretty drastic and..dull.. change when the Blue Lions are out on the month’s mission.

- You’re probably also close to several Blue Lions if you’re dating Dimitri, which makes it seem even more lonely. Of course, you have friends in Golden Deer that you hang out with, but it always feels like a part of you is missing when you don’t have a yearning little Dimitri following you like a lost puppy.

- If you’ve made this much progress in getting Dimitri to open up, he trusts you more than anyone in the world alongside Dedue. So, you’re always welcome to spend time in his room and you often find yourself doing so when the days wind down and you miss him the most. You probably absentmindedly sharpen any weapons he hasn’t taken with him or organize all his schoolwork for him so he isn’t stressed when he returns.

- Even though he insists that you drop any formality whatsoever, Dimitri is still a prince, so he probably has a pretty full closet...full of capes for you to steal!! >:3

- Around the last night before he gets back to the monastery, longing really hits you when you think about how long it’s been without your cuddly boyfriend around. So when curfew comes around that night and you have to leave the comfort of his room, you say ‘ah screw it’ and just snatch one of his pretty blue capes before heading off to your bed.

- Even at 17-18, Dimitri is still tall as hell. Idk how tall reader is, but I’m a whopping 5’2 so I’m gonna say that his cape would be pretty big on you 😭 You wrap yourself in that thing like a burrito, period. I can imagine it’s made from very nice material, so it’s probably silky and soft. Then, you conk tf out!

- The next day is a Sunday, so you’re half awake snuggling into this boy’s cape later in the morning when his class gets back. The first thing Dimitri does after reporting everything to Rhea and Seteth with the professor is bolt up to your dorm room. He’s that overjoyed kinda shaky like little kids heading to open up their presents on their birthday. He might even forget to knock, honestly. He’s got chivalry built into him as a prince but right now his head is whirring too much to think about anything else.

- Sunlight pouring into your room makes you bunch up the fabric close to your face and you let out a very sedated, groggy greeting in your sleepy state.

- Dimitri.exe has stopped working. HOLY SHIT IS THAT HIS CAPE??? His face is every shade of red imaginable. Probably lets out incoherent stutters for a couple minutes until you’re fully awake and call him over happily. Dimitri’s a big boy and he finally says a sentence, albeit a very squeaky one! ‘Is-is that my cape, beloved..??’ You’re 100x more composed and just laugh and hand it back to him before explaining you missed him and kissing him on the cheek. Dimitri machine broke. You’re wearing his cape like a blanket! And you said it’s because you missed him! You really love him and you’re adorable! Yeah, it’s just gonna be hugs for a bit, it’s gonna take a minute to reboot your Dimitri.

Post Timeskip:

- Shortly after pre timeskip scenario, Dimi convinced you to transfer to his house. I’m gonna say this is Dimi after he gets his shit together a little bit because acquiring clothing from a feral Dimitri would be like a militaristic game of capture the flag. He’s still an awkward goof but you’re gonna need to get him to allow himself to show emotion again before he eventually breaks and confides in you.

- I can imagine that some nights, camping out at the monastery or various locations of battles could get pretty damn cold when the temperature drops at night and you don’t have any heating system. So, strategy or information update meetings called at night are probably going to be one of your least favorite times, after actual fighting of course.

- Your former classmates from Faerghus thrive in the cold, and this was nothing compared to winters where they’re from. (You might be well adjusted to cold too but I’m from god damn Texas so I’m saying reader lived in a much warmer climate, closer to Claude’s lmao🖤) You, on the other hand, are FREEZING and your friends think it’s quite amusing.

- So here you are, sitting between your boyfriend and Sylvain while Byleth makes a report and you’re freezing your ass off!! Like how is no one else cold you are covered in goosebumps and you’re pretty sure you just started shaking a little bit. Everyone has noticed and is trying to pay attention to Byleth but Sylvain is the first to give in and antagonize you. In the most condescending fake surprised tone possible ‘Oh man, are you getting cold? I was actually just thinking it’s such nice weather that I don’t even need a jacket!’

- Dimitri is straight wheezing into his hand he is trying so hard not to laugh but it’s too funny he can’t help it man 😭 Initiating ball mode you are holding your knees tucked into your chest for warmth and pouting because you’re salty. Plan backfired your boyfriend is full on snickering at you now because you’re adorable.

- Just when you’ve reached the maximum level of pouting possible something very soft and warm is draped over you and encompasses you in all your balled up glory. Although it’s a little heavier now, and you can feel the fluff of fur around your shoulders, you still recognize the luxurious fabric from Dimitri’s old cape 5 years ago.

- Too stubborn to say thank you right now so you just lean into Dimi lmao. His gauntlets are always freezing but you’re in a cozy burrito right now so he’ll wrap an arm around you. Sylvain is currently celebrating his status as the greatest wingman of all time.

- Bonus points if you put your cheek up to his chest he lives for being as close to you as physically possible. Will pet your hair if you don’t mind the armor.

- Felix is having an internal hissy fit and glaring daggers at Dimitri because BOAR HAS FEELINGS? EWWWWWWW. If Dimitri gives you a kiss he absolutely yells at you both to get a room you cannot convince me otherwise. Byleth is so sick of everyone’s shit.

Thank you for enabling my Dimitri lovemail anon, I hope you like it :3 Hope you don’t mind post timeskip being a lil changed from original prompt I just thought it was a nice progression 🥺🍄

[chimswae]

BTS Caretaker CH21

Summary: She may think she has Bangtan Sonyeondan wrapped around her fingers. She may think it is easy to love the members equally without hurting any soul. She may think the boys wont fall head over heels for her. She assumes it is okay to show a little love and affection towards the boys, what if she gets it all wrong? What if it only brings more complication to her already complicated life? Can she survive their charms? Will she be able to resist them? What if they just wont let her go?

- Pairing: BTS x Oc ( Yoongi x OC, Jungkook x OC)

- Genre: Fluff, Slight Angst, Romance, Idol!au

- Word Count: 6, 707

- Author Note: I missed the date of posting new chapter again, okay so caught up with work :< aish, but it is okay i am updating now!

Previous | Next

Chapter 21

It was a long silence between them, neither the boys nor Seul dared to utter anything. To begin with, what was they supposed to say at first place. The Jungkook and Seul relationship or Jimin’s sudden outburst. As much as they wanted to bring Yoongi’s side of the story into the picture, they thought it was out of context. Yoongi’s issues had nothing to do with them, yet one of the reasons that trigger Jimin’s anger was related to Yoongi after all.

For once Namjoon had never feel burdened with the responsibility as the leader of BTS until today. Firstly, he had to unravel the tense between Jungkook, Jimin and Seul. The atmosphere between the four walls were suffocating him, and he could tell everyone felt the same. He held his breath for a long time before exhaling a deep sigh garnering everyone’s eyes on him “Alright. Let’s get thing straight” glancing at the maknae whom sat across him. Seul felt her heart being torn apart from this impromptu confrontation. To be frank, she was not ready to be questioned this way especially when it came to her and Jungkook status.

“Jung, is there something going on between you and Seul?” Namjoon probed. Gulping away her nervousness, Seul was being surrounded by a group of man who appeared to be very protective over the youngest member of their group. Yoongi looked like he was ready to swing his baseball bat and beat some shit outta Jungkook and Jimin. His eyes never left Seul ever since the scene at her workplace. Not that he cared, yet it was bothersome to be remembered by it. Learning the truth behind Jungkook’s disappearance at night stung his heart even more.

Jungkook is one step ahead him. Yoongi groaned in frustration.

Jungkook stammered “Seul and I…We became friends because I am their frequent customer there. I spent my time there to draw” he pressed his palms together searching for strength to face his members’ wrath.

“You become friends and as far as I am concern friends don’t kiss, that is too affectionate. What is the meaning behind those kiss? ” Jin leaned his back on the seat, tilting his head to take a good look of Seul expression. Now that they had came to this, he feared to hear the truth.

Jungkook and Seul relationship would be the beginning or the end of him.

Chewing her chapped lips, Seul fingers fidgeted unconsciously at the end of her pink sweater. Her rapid breathing was drawing Hoseok attention who appeared to sit just beside her, he leaned over whispering softly “Are you okay Seul? You don’t look good” his voice was as soft as his sunny smile. It managed to calm her down a little.

She nodded, squishing her eyes tight for a moment before opened it again only to be welcomed by Hoseok’s round eyes “I can manage this, thank you Hoseok” she flashed a weak smile. He returned to his seat with a small smile and gave his attention on Jungkook and Namjoon.

“What I know it was not a mistake. Those kisses are real. I…like Seul” Jungkook’s confession earned different reaction from the floor. Some were scoffing away, some were too dumbfounded to even react, and some were stayed frozen in their seat shooting Jungkook a judgemental look. That was not definitely in their dictionary. What changed Jungkook to be this confident and super determined of his own feelings?

Jungkook’s eyes met Seul confused one, making Jimin rolled his eyes in his seat. Salty Park Jimin about to open his mouth to say something, but his fellow 95 liner friend already jumped in “Do you see her as a woman, Jungkook? Someone that you wish to own” upon hearing Taehyung’s last word, Seul blushed madly. The thought of being owned by someone never occurred to her some more, the person is a member from famous idols of the century. Crazy as it sound Seul couldn’t stop her heart from making weird noise inside.

They only needed one nod from Jungkook to confirm everything, so they could make sense out from this situation. Jungkook had never been so open to them when it came to his own feelings. To witness the younger guy being bluntly honest about his inner feeling gave some sense of relief to the hyungs. Over the years Jungkook was known to be very introvert and he did not talk to strangers unless he felt comfortable with them. Jungkook had few friends in the industry like GOT7’s Yugyeom and Seventeen’s Mingyu yet it did not stop him to get out from his comfort zone. Part of them were grateful of his feeling for Seul, it was a good start for Jungkook to be more open to other options in life. However, it also worrisome considering it involved commitment and serious relationship.

Each of the members had a mixed feeling about this Jungkook liking Seul thing. To break it down, Namjoon main concerned was whether this relationship Jungkook plan to have with Seul is healthy. After his failed relationship with Hyemi, he did not want others to experience the pain of losing someone whom he thought important in life only to be left hanging without words. Not to mention as a leader and a brother of Jungkook, he did not want Jungkook to get hurt. Relationship involved commitment, was Jungkook ready to carry the burden on his shoulder?

Kim Seokjin. He was neutral. People couldn’t read through him as he always appears optimistic and positive to everyone. Internally he’s suffering from the confession. He did show his interest on Seul because their friendship started off pretty normal that involved no fight. Nowadays, Seokjin enjoyed Seul’s presence around him apart from his 92-line squad and his game squad, Jin had Seul to listen the worries that he had whenever he couldn’t talk it out with his members or other friends. Seul is a good listener. As he learnt that one of the members revealed his feeling openly to Seul, was this a sign to back off before things got complicated later on?

When it came to Hoseok, this was his second-time meeting Seul so he did not have any issues with her. He knew Seul was a nice girl and worth to be loved by many. She deserved all the love from the world. If there’s one thing that bothered Hoseok would be her genuine intention in befriending them. Not that Hoseok wanted to question her integrity, but the world is a scary place. They could not just bluntly trust people that they barely knew especially Seul. Even though she’s a daughter of Mrs Hwang their original caretaker whom treated them like their own son these past few years, they shouldn’t depend on that one factor only. It was a matter of fact that people could be toxic without they realized, just like Son Hyemi.

Sitting with his mouth sealed tight on the armrest was Taehyung. His expression did not give away any worries or emotions pertaining to this issue, but he still found it a little over the top for his sane mind to comprehend. Without doubt, he was attracted of Seul at first place became the reason why he snapped her picture and kept it on his night stand. That small crush that he had for Seul was still unclear, it needed to be shaped. Considering things had changed now, would it be better for him to eradicate this small crush he had for Seul before it became contagious to his heart? He did not want any heartbreak in the future wasn’t he.

Jimin on the other hand looked distressed in his seat. His protective instinct for Jungkook earlier on was soon replaced by annoyance. Annoyance of his own discomfort to the idea of there was another guy liking Seul and it happened to be Jungkook. The only difference between them, Jungkook had guts to sort his feeling out when he didn’t. That Jimin saw Seul more than just a friend was evident. But he refused to conform to the reality of life. It was a reticent, very private feeling which he had no intention to reveal just yet.

Yoongi was complicating things around him and his true feelings that he had for Seul. Everyone could literally see how possessive he was over Seul, yet he denied that fact at all cost. The fact that he used revenge to steal kisses from Seul, Yoongi was actually trying to confirm his own feeling. At first, he assumed it was a mere admiration towards Seul’s sassiness however it turned into something deeper not long after. He was dragging himself down into the deepest pit of the dark hole in his heart. Wanting to escape, yet he failed. As a result, Yoongi came out pretty hard and aggressive on Seul even though he wasn’t intended to hurt her. It came out neutral because he was not ready to embrace the truth. The truth might hit him a little hard on his face, so Yoongi was afraid to take the risk. With this Jungkook thing, Yoongi realized he must do something about this before too late.

“So, answer him, do you see Seul as a woman or is it a mere admiration?” Jin broke the long silence desperate to hear the answer though he’s not really keen of listening to it.

Nodding with a soft sigh “I see her as a woman and I like her because she is Seul” that was enough to melt Seul’s heart again as blush crept up warming her cheeks. Why was she being weak again? Now since they had settled with Jungkook, seven pair of eyes landed on her. She was in deep shit.

“Seul, do you know Jungkook is Jungkook?” the leader raised his eyebrow in question.

“No, I don’t. He was wearing mask 24/7 how do you expect me to notice that is him?” her voice broke a little due to the intensity that she felt inside her.

Jimin found the chance to butt in with a sarcastic remark “Funny thing is, you are a fan. How can you not know Jungkook even from his eyes?” he glowered.

Seul looked so piss as she glared at Jimin “Funny thing, I am not Jungkook’s fan. Neither of you are my favourite. How do you expect me to remember your eyes when I messed up your faces and names” the corner of Yoongi’s lips were tugged into a smirk. Ji Seul makes a comeback, as expected. He complimented in his head admiring her sassiness.

Pursing his lips sulkily, Jimin shook his head giving up on his argument with Seul already. She was impossible to beat especially when it involved to defending herself. Seul always know what to say.

Namjoon continued “Alright. You have no idea it is Jungkook, so you befriend him. Both of you become friend and Jungkook apparently reveal his feelings for you. How about your feelings? Do you like Jungkook that way?” upon hearing that question, Seul turned pale.

Taehyung scrutinized her expression with so much interest trying to read through her but to no avail. Would it be possible that she did not see Jungkook more than a friend? A spark of hope lightens his heart a little. Taehyung was up for any possibility.

“I repeat, do you like Jungkook more than just a friend?” Namjoon pressed. He was acting like a father-in-law making other cringe in their seat. Yoongi small eyes were watching Seul every little move, causing her to shift uncomfortably under his hard gaze. This did not work at all. She did not have the answers with her. Everything happened too fast.

Seul heaved a heavy sigh “I don’t know. I am not sure. My feelings for Jungkook are still ambiguous, I can’t exactly tell whether it is more than just a friend. It is still too early to decide it, I am sorry Jungkook” she threw an apologetic look at Jungkook.

He felt a heavy tug on his heart, but he managed to pull a soft smile on his face “Don’t be sorry Seul. I told you I don’t want to push you, we can still work on this” Seul bit her lower lips, lowering her gaze shyly. Jungkook would not give up on his feeling for Seul that easily. It took a lot of courage to embrace this new side of him, to give up on it just like that would be a waste.

“Someone got friend zoned” Hoseok joked to light up the mood.

“I AM NOT-“ “SHE ISNT-“ they were surprised to see Jungkook and Seul perfect timing. Seul’s cheeks turned into fifty shades of red realizing she was indirectly admitting to the fact that she was interested in Jungkook as well though she needed time to figure it out.

“You are reconsidering Jungkook’s feelings?” Taehyung’s eyes glimmered in curiosity.

Jungkook rubbed his neck, holding back his bunny smile “Yes I am. I need time. I am not used to this” Seul mumbled timidly. Jimin was hurt by her answers, now it was obvious Seul might end up liking Jungkook for real is he didn’t do anything about it.  What should he do again to fix this mess that he created?

“But, that doesn’t mean you have confirmed your true feelings for Jungkook right?” Yoongi’s hoarse voice baffled everyone. The older guy had chosen to keep his mouth shut all the time, hence to hear something coming from him was intimidating. Because after all, though Yoongi did not say it aloud about his feeling for Seul, all of them knew that guy had a thing for her. Jungkook realized it too. He had been stealing glance at Yoongi during their conversation, and his attention was on Seul most of the time.

Jungkook was not alone in this complicated battle. With Yoongi came into the picture, Jungkook was mentally ready to fight healthily.

“We can say that” not letting Yoongi’s stare penetrated her heart, Seul avoided his gaze at all cost.

Smiling with full of gratification, Yoongi arose from his seat “Then this conversation is over. That is all I need to hear” he gave one final look at Seul sending chill down her spine. She watched his body disappeared behind the door to his room leaving only six members around her.

“I am leaving too” muttering lowly, Jimin left the scene without saying much as Hoseok decided to tail him. He sensed something was wrong with Jimin, so he excused himself to investigate further. Taehyung followed not long after “I will see you later Seul..” he smiled warmly making his way stealthily to his room.

Jin was contemplating whether to be honest about his discomfort, in the end he chose to just shut it and give it a long thought before expressing it out. “Seul just stay over tonight, it is late. We don’t want you to walk in the dark alone. I will prepare the room for you” Jin stood up leaving the scene giving Seul no chance to protest. She grunted softly under her breath refusing the idea of staying over there today. Bad start.

Confused, Namjoon ran his fingers in his lock accompanied by a soft hum “Jungkook can you give us space? I need to talk with Seul alone” he turned to the younger guy that immediately nod with a small sigh.

Seul looked up with a small smile “Thank you Jungkook. Go rest” her sincerity made Jungkook fall head over heels for her again. A simple attention from Seul managed to crush another wall inside him, he craved for it.

“You too, see you in the morning. I hope. Good night Seul” his steps were heavy, even though this issue was settled due to the long talk, it still makes him nervous. After making sure Jungkook was nowhere to be seen around them, Namjoon shifted his attention back on the drained girl in front of him. His heart softened as his eyes landed on Seul’s distressed face.  

“Seul-ah I won’t stop you or Jungkook. It is up to both of you to decide. Remember, if you hurt Jungkook you will have to face me. Do not give him a false hope even though it is okay for both of you to consider the options in front of you. I don’t want to see Jungkook broken-hearted”

“And, I have to warn you before things get out of hand. It is not just Jungkook’s feelings matter in this but others too. I can see another person in the room who actually like you just as much” Seul blinked with an unreadable expression.

“What do you mean by that” she retorted in disbelief. Did Namjoon just imply there were other BTS members liking her other than Jungkook? How was this even real? Seul felt so unreal at the moment. The impossibility only happened in dramas or movies. Since this occurred to her, she had no idea how to react to it.

Namjoon pressed his lips into thin line “You will find out soon. I am not the one who should tell you that. Just, make sure to not hurt anyone or yourself Seul-ah. Love is a scary thing. It is complicated. You can’t stop your feelings from loving someone, so give it a chance. Give the person a chance. Then you decide” he hinted.

“I am sorry Namjoon for causing this mess. I hope you are not being too hard on Jimin, he is right to doubt me. You guys barely knew me, so I understood Jimin. Even though part of me wanted to hit him hard for calling me a bitch. How dare he called me that” she grinded her teeth showing of her resentment over Jimin’s choice of word.

Chuckling softly, Namjoon nodded with an amused face “Don’t worry about Jimin. We fought a lot, then we made up the next day. This was nothing. Forgive Jimin and his foul mouth, he could be a little too vulgar when he got angry”

“He is protecting Jungkook that is normal. Your bonds are too strong even I couldn’t break that. I am glad Jimin decided to cuss at me instead of letting it slip off from his mind. That shows how much he cared for his members” she threw the compliments earnestly. It was true, it offended her, but she tried to see the bigger picture of it.

Namjoon had a proud smile on his face to hear someone admiring their brotherhood. It made him realized their bonds were no joke and he mentally agreed to Seul’s words. The tense in the room was diminishing and Seul finally able to breathe normally. Jin approached the two “The room is ready Seul, you should rest. I have prepared clean sweat and shirt on the bed for you to change. Don’t worry it is new, wear it” he beamed.

“Can i… not stay? This is uncomfortable” she murmured.

“What nonsense is that. No way, it is 4 in the morning. Just stay, we won’t let you go home at this time” Namjoon voice was stern and dominating. No wonder he’s the leader.

Seul eyes quivered uncomfortably, showing off her concern about the idea of a girl staying in an idol house “I don’t want to get caught by your manager, that would be bad. They have no idea about me replacing my mother” she tried to make up excuses to escape this place.

“We will be leaving around 10 for practice so, hyung won’t be here until the schedule. Don’t worry, leave before that” Jin showed no sign of giving up too, cornering the latter in process. “Just stay Seul, you don’t want to wear yourself out at work later. Go get some rest, the room is down the hall, just across Jimin and Hoseok” he gave a light pat on her head.

Seul finally gave in and nodded “Fine, I will stay just because I feel bad for what happened today. Thank you Jin. Good night both of you” she bid them a good night and made her way cautiously to the guest room.

Ji Seul, what will change after today. Seul made a mental note on it and decided to call it a day. She deserved a long rest after the therapy talk with Namjoon.

 --------------

Tossing her body under the duvet, Seul found it was hard to fall asleep. It must be due to the new surroundings, with that she sat up groggily leaving the queen size bed for a moment to get warm drinks for herself. The hallway was quiet and dead, and she was sure the boys were already asleep at this time.

Seul glanced at the clock on the wall and muttered “It is just 5, ugh” she hugged her body, dragging her lazy feet to the kitchen. She made herself a hot cocoa in hope after this she could shut her eyes for two hours before sun rose again.

As she was about to leave with a cup of cocoa in her hand, she saw light flooding out from the open door of one of the rooms. She walked silently towards the source of light making sure her feet on the ground did not produce any unwanted sound.  The room was a private lounge room for the boys to chill when they have times, it was decorated with music equipment at the corner, book shelves and a small purple billiard table. Across the book shelves there was a L-shape sofa to complete the room.

Seul peeked her head a little searching for familiar faces inside but only to be welcomed by an empty room. Straighten herself back to her original trance, she reached out for the switch light to turn it off. To her sheer surprise, a pair of hand wrapped securely around her wrist preventing her from moving. Startled, Seul’s eyes searched from the owner of the hand who stood few steps from her.

“Jimin…” she exhaled.

Jimin’s eyes looked sleepily and there were few strands of hair stuck out making him to appear super cute. To top that, he was wearing a cute blue pyjama with stars and moon design printed on it. Seul mentally judging Jimin’s appearance as well as trying to get a hold of herself from fangirling over this look.

“Can’t sleep?” he signalled the drinks in her hand with a flat smile.

“Yes.. do you want some I can make you one?” she offered.

Declining it politely, Jimin brought Seul’s hand down and looked at her way a little too intense. Her breath hitched in process like it was about to pop off any second by now “We can share” he suggested.

“Urm..Sure…” Jimin tugged her  hand softly, bringing her inside the room to the sofa. Both of them sat down awkwardly side by side, and it made her felt uneasy. Jimin held back his tongue finding a perfect word to start this conversation. He couldn’t sleep because the guilt was slowly eating him up. He had a hard time to get Seul out of his mind.

Licking his lower lips, Jimin fisted his pyjama stealing glance at Seul’s side profile that never ceased to amaze him. A soft smile crept on his face, but as soon as their eyes locked, it rendered him speechless. Words that came out from Seul’s mouth only went pass through him, his attention was on her soft lips. The stain of hot cocoa at the corner of her lips made his mind went wild for a moment. He had to urge to kiss her but quickly shrug the thought off from his mind.

“Jimin..I said, do you want to take a sip?” her brows quirked in confusion.

Jimin removed the mug from her hand and took a long sip of the hot drinks without looking at her. It was not his intention to have a weird thought on Seul, yet he couldn’t help but to think that way. His hand was shaking a little, and his grip on the mug was about to slip off but Seul fast reflex avoided any accident happen.

She sat the mug down on the coffee table, sending a worried glance at Jimin “Jimin are you alright?” she whispered. Seul touched his forehead with the back of her hand, flustering Jimin even more “I..am alright… Just cold…” he coughed away the lump on his throat.

“Do you want me to turn on the heater?” Seul was about to get up until she felt him holding her down not allowing her to move even an inch. She blushed at the closeness of their face and body. Watching her this up close caused uproar in his heart, his eyes travelled from her eyes to her cute nose down to her lips again.

Jimin ran his hand to her jaw, giving a soft trace around the skin that tingled her heart. She held back her own heavy breathing, letting her eyes roamed freely on Jimin’s face. He stroked his thumb over her lips, stroking it effortlessly slow caused the latter to mewl a little under his magic touch.

Seul was aware, she’s supposed to be upset of Jimin. They hadn’t talk about what happened at the café, and it was so wrong to be this close to each other. Where was the tense between them again? How could it diminish that easily?

Her eyes fluttered open upon feeling Jimin strong gaze on her, and she was indeed right. Jimin eyes sparked under the light, looking dashing as always even without his makeup. He would always appear beautiful in front of her. Resting his forehead against Seul, he murmured awfully low “Seul-ah..I am sorry..for everything” it surprised her once again. Wow, Jimin is full of surprise.

“I didn’t mean to yell at you or call you with those horrible names. I was protecting Jungkook and..myself I guess..It was hard to admit to my own feeling Seul-ah” he continued.

Protecting himself? Seul flinched.

Seul smiled meekly as her fingers unconsciously tangled with his free hand on his lap, fiddling around casually “I understand. And I want to apologize too. It is my fault that this happen. You have the right to question me, because I am a stranger. Just don’t call me bitch, I really hated it” her lower lips puckered out a little showing her protest.

Jimin’s soft chuckle ease the tension that she felt earlier with him “I need to control my anger next time. I am sorry that I vent it out on you. In fact, I have something to tell you Seul” Seul face fell with anticipation.

What else would she hear today?

“Seul-ah” he called out softly, sitting up straight.

For the umpteenth time today, Seul’s face started to lose its colour again.

Interlacing their hand together, Jimin took a deep breath before breaking the eerie silence again “Since it come to this, I will play it fair beside Jungkook” he professed.

“What do you mean by that” she looked at him clueless.

“I see you as a woman...”

“……..”

“I like you a lot Seul. More than you imagine. This feeling is torturing me” Seul lips quivered letting the emotions overflowed her. Then it hit him hard, so this was the thing that Namjoon hinted her earlier. Jimin was another someone in BTS who had similar feelings as Jungkook.

Seul squeaked “Jimin..I…don’t know, it is just-“ he hushed her, shaking his head slowly.

“Don’t… I want to play it fair as I mention. You don’t get to decide now. We will give this thing a time. I don’t mind, as long as you allow me to show my genuine feelings for you. Will you?”

“Jimin..I might not be worth fighting for” she looked down on their intertwined hands, giving him a soft squish.

He sighed “Yes you are. I deny my feelings enough Seul and I am not doing that again. It only hurts you and I. That is not worth it,  I am embracing my feelings that I have for you. Let me fight along with Jungkook” Seul heaved a tired sigh.

“I don’t want you to get hurt. I don’t want Jungkook to get hurt. What if, this only bring pain rather than happiness?” she expressed her worries. Even though, it was indeed true you couldn’t stop yourself from falling in love, but this issue was more than just that. It involved a lot of thing.

“We will manage that. I talked this out with Jungkook”

Her eyes rounded in sheer surprise “You did? When?” she inquired.

“Urm… as soon as the talk with Namjoon hyung ended. Jungkook is more than just a friend, he is my family. We talked about this. Seul, it is not like we plan to fall in love with the same person. It is coincidence. We will be able to manage this without hatred” Jimin convinced.

Seul needed a moment to decipher this whole thing. The idea of being in the middle of Jimin and Jungkook was so bad making her unsure of herself. If this only involved these two guys then it would be fine to her, but what if someone else resurfaced and professed the same thing, like Yoongi. She shrugged off the thought of the possibility being fight over again by another member.

“Jimin..I am not sure, I am scared of the future”

“Then lets live the present, that is important. Do not think about the future”

“At the end of the day, I will still have to choose” she protested.

“And when that day come, we will ready our heart Seul-ah. It is long way to go, do not let the future hold us back” he whispered, caressing her cheeks lovingly.

It never dawns on her to experience this kind of thing this year, what a mess. Did her decision to replace her mother as BTS Caretaker only to cause chaos rather than promoting peace?

Seul sighed, resting her head against his shoulder seeking for comfort and warmth. This thing was draining her energy, she felt numb. Jimin wrapped his arm automatically around her shoulder, bringing her close to his chest “I am sorry if this is too much for you to handle Seul” he rubbed his arm, planting soft kiss on top of her head.

Curling up in his embrace, Seul buried her face at the crook of his neck, inhaling his sweet manly scent “I am sorry that I can’t give both of you the answer that you want” she mumbled against his skin.

“Why are you sorry? We don’t need the answers now, we only need your presence around us. That is enough” he soothed his lock, smiling ear to ear at their close proximity. He had been dreaming doing this thing with Seul, having her in her arms and cuddling on the sofa. It felt unreal.

“Thank you Seul..”

“And what is that for?”

“For existing and allowing me to experience this”

Seul smiled to herself “That line is so cliché Jim. And, thank you for having that kind of feeling for me. ” he beamed. Jimin locked his arms around her tighter, nuzzling her hair in process. Whatever it takes, Jimin would never deny his true feelings anymore. He’s willing to see how far this could go. Only that he was not able to see what the future beholds, it never stops him.

Her lids started to grow heavy, and she found herself enjoying Jimin’s warmth around her. Was this a start of everything? She did question herself what change after today. Guess, Seul had to live with the fact that in one day she received two confessions from an unexpected male.

Her life was about to get interesting.

 -----------------

When Jimin woke up it was eight in the morning, they had cuddled on the couch and fallen asleep. Jimin smiled to himself admiring Seul’s sleeping face, he felt a warmth that he never experiences before. Seul looked exhausted and calm in his embrace. His moist lips landed on top of her head to get her to wake up.

Few minutes later, she roused herself and with her eyes perfectly shut, he could see her sweet smile on her face “Did we fell asleep here?” she stretched a little, burying her face shyly in his chest.

Jimin chuckled, stroking her back gently “Yes, but we did get a good sleep anyway” Seul nodded and sat up followed by Jimin afterwards. As soon as her eyes landed on Jimin’s morning hair, she giggled and leaned closer. Raking her fingers in his soft lock, she stroked it gently, fixing it a little while Jimin was too busy staring at her.

“There you are set to go” she exclaimed. Her chirpy voice lightens up his world, what a good way to start a new day. “Oh shoot, it is late I need to clean the house and prepare you guys breakfast. I hope Jin is not awake yet” she combed her hair getting ready to leave.

“You go out first I will come out later. You don’t want to be bombarded by questions this early” he pinched her nose. Scrunching her nose cutely, she gave in with the idea. Seul arose from her feet and as she was about to leave, she skipped quickly to his side.

Dazed Jimin gave her a questionable look, she closed the gap between them, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. He turned giddy over it and she heard her whisper “You said to give both of you a chance. So, I am giving both of you a chance. Good morning Jimin” with those last word, she skidded outside the room with a bright pink face.

Jimin buried himself once again under the soft blanket, letting himself fanboying over this small tingly feeling that he had this early. He would never regret his decision. Just like he said, he would only live the present for now. The future was still far ahead, anything could happen until then. If he worries the future now, it would be no fun in dealing with his every day’s life.

 ------------------

Jin blinked at the figure who just walked pass him and he called her out before she could disappear further “Seul, you are awake?” she jolted and turned to face Jin nervously.

“Are you awake already? I am so sorry, I overslept Jin. Let me prepare the breakfast!” she walked over to Jin with guilt.

“Hey don’t worry Seul. It is my duty. Today, I want you to eat my cooking. May I know why are you coming out from that way?” he blinked, taking a good look at Seul’s flushed face.

Seul rubbed her arms, trying to find perfect answers which did not sound suspicious “I couldn’t sleep yesterday. I stayed in the lounge until I fell asleep” Jin lips was formed into an ‘o’ shape with a bright smile.

“Good morning hyu-“Jimin cleared his throat realizing the older guy had woken up and was interrogating Seul. She cursed in her head in frustration when she heard Jimin’s voice boomed across the hall. That called for another trouble.

Jin eyed the two suspiciously “And why are you not in your room, may I ask?” he probed with a hint of jealousy.

“I…fall asleep in Jungkook’s room.. We got carried away and we really had a long talk” he lied. Jimin and Seul exchanged nervous glance as both of them felt their brain momentarily froze due to Jin’s sudden appearance this morning.

“Really? Hurm.. Okay then.. go wash up and wake up others” a sigh of relief escaped from their lips. Jin bought it and that was good enough. Fleeing from the scene, Jimin quickly entered his room before he could ask him more question.

Jin travelled his eyes to Seul “You too go wash up. I will prepare breakfast for us alright?” he hushed her out from his territory causing the girl to pout in protest. She complied to Jin’s request anyways because after all, he almost caught her red handed a few second ago. How awful would it be if Jin found out Jimin and her fell asleep on the couch together?

Everyone was in the dining room an hour later, and for some reason the thick atmosphere was no longer there. Instead, the breakfast turned out to be lively and filled with laughter from every corner. The boys made Seul felt comfortable and she was grateful none of them brought up the sensitive topic anymore. So, they had decided to follow the flow and not to pressure themselves over petty things. Since Jimin and Jungkook had decided to play it nicely, there was nothing to be worried off.

Hoseok on the other hand had the time of his life, goofing around with Seul which she enjoyed every second the guy cracked his silly jokes. In fact, Kim Taehyung also showed his silly side making everyone cringe at his randomness. Everyone had opened up to each other and to have Seul in the picture gave more colours to their already meaningful life. After breakfast, Seul cleaned up the place like she usually does but only this time the boys offered their hands to help.

No matter how much she insisted of doing it alone, they were all stubborn. They only allowed her to do the laundry and cleaned the living room and their private lounge. Namjoon ordered his members to clean their own room which they complied without any complain. Even for the lazy bum Jungkook, surprisingly he was the first one to finish off the cleaning. Therefore, he went to Seul helping her with the laundry.

She had given up to nag or show her protest, so she let the boy to help. In exchanged of that, Seul had a good chat with Jungkook. It felt better to have conversation with Jungkook without his mask on. This felt too real to be truth, but this guy was down to earth. Every Bangtan members was not as snobby as she thought they appeared to be. They were not just effortlessly beautiful, but they were kind and relatable.

Relatable, that was the perfect way to describe them.

After good one-hour spring cleaning with Bangtan, they were ready to leave for their practice. Seul too was getting ready to leave for work, she bowed showing off her gratitude for letting her stay over a day “Thank you for letting me stay” she smiled.

“Need I to remind you this is your workplace too. Don’t be formal. We are glad to have you around” Jin ruffled her hair only to receive a low protest from Seul. She shot him a glare for messing up her hair. Jin raised his hand in defeat and shrugged.

“It is fun to clean the dorm with you Seul. Will we be able to meet you again next time?” Taehyung had a big fat smile across his face causing to squeal over his cuteness. “Of course, there will always be next time” she jabbed his arm playfully.

“Leave before your manager come up hunting you down. Have a good day ahead everyone” she waved as she watched one by one of them leaving. Jungkook gave her a brief hug with a wink, causing her to blush instantly.

She deadpanned mentally, trying to get used to his affection towards him.

Yoongi was fall behind and the sight in front of him, annoyed him to the core. He shoved his hand in his pocket pulling out a small paper resembled the sticky note. Scrutinizing his straight face, Seul looked down on her hand when he slipped the note on her palm.

“What is this?”

“Tomorrow, 4PM. Bungee jumping. It is a date” he dashed off without saying more. Seul gawked not believing what she just heard few seconds ago. Did Yoongi just ask her out for a date? It came to her realization; the small note was an admission ticket to the bungee jumping thing.

Does it mean, it isn’t just Jimin. Yoongi too? She grunted under her sharp breath. Seul was making sense out of this again. How was it possible to have three guys chasing after her fragile heart?

   This work belongs to  Chimswae © 2020. All Rights Reserved

[trainsinanime]

I think in retrospect, my post bitching about Ladrien was a mistake. It was written out of frustration, in response to a post that I perceived as trying to push Ladrien as morally superior to Marichat. That was probably not the right way to read this post. And even if it had been, the correct response would certainly not have been to vague-tumble (sub-tumble?) about it. I should just delete it.

…or I can double down and post more controversial Miraculous Ladybug shipping hot takes. Which one of these would be more fun? Difficult, difficult…

Adrigami vs Lukanette

I have seen more than one post argue that people prefer Lukanette over Adrigami because of racism, or because Kagami is too pushy, or similar. Now, for the record, I prefer anything above Lukanette and I personally love to ship Adrigaminette (specifically the version where everyone involved is really stupid about it). But I don’t think the moralistic argument can explain all of why Lukanette is so popular.

The problem is that we all love our point of view character Marinette and want good things to happen to her. Yes, there are exceptions in the fandom, but those are a small minority, no matter how loud they are. Adrigami is fun, interesting, engaging, they have both common points and interesting conflicts, and I’d absolutely love to watch a show about it… but Adrigami has one key drawback: It makes Marinette sad. And nobody wants that.

Lukanette, on the other hand, doesn’t make anyone (in universe) sad. Adrien and Kagami are okay with it, and it doesn't seem to affect Marinette's emotional state at all. (Yeah, sorry, not a fan of Luka, but I'll try not to dwell on it because my reasons for not liking him are not interesting, much like he is.)

Lukanette also works really well if you want to be salty about stuff but aren’t willing to go full Batman. The main salt objection to Adrien is that Chat Noir can be too pushy with his romantic feelings, which is arguably true, and that this means he is a horrible person, which I don’t exactly agree with. That cannot be said about Luka, who has no flaws, wishes, character motivation or similar nasty things that could get in the way.

All of these factors have nothing to do with Kagami whatsoever. Now, if you’re wondering why Lukanette is more popular than Kagaminette, then we’re getting somewhere.

Next up, more controversial opinions about other pairings:

Adrienette

Horrible, awful. Adrinette is king.

Marichat

Just to reiterate: I love Marichat moments. I don’t think regular Marichat dates, whether that is romantic dates or friend dates, works at all. Marichat lives from the fact that they’re both friends, yes, but also from the low-key spy vs spy antics where they try to convince each other that they’re not actually best friends yet. (Ladrien could do the same but they’re too busy awkwardly blushing at each other to get any sustained antics going)

Ladynoir

These two do not go on patrols in canon. I know every fan claims so, but there’s no canon evidence, except for Dark Owl/Hibou Noir, where the regular patrols are clearly established as something unusual that both of them want to end soon. Yes, I know there’s one instagram post, and supposedly one tweet (not that I’ve ever seen it), but it’s not in the show. And let’s be real, why would they go on patrols? Hawkmoth canonically creates Akumas whenever, including frequently during school hours. Patrols can’t help against that. That’s why our heroes canonically use alerting apps.

The reason why people love patrols is because it gets Ladynoir together without having to invent an Akuma. I can see the appeal behind that… but honestly, isn’t that just lazy? The show generally makes sure to show us the tail end of the adventure that brought them together this time, and I think that is more fun. Alternatively, sometimes, the show just doesn’t bother to explain why they’re together in costume at all (e.g. the end of Chat Blanc), and it turns out that this is also a thing you can do and nobody will hate you for it.

Adrinette

This may be my most controversial opinion yet, but I want these two crazy kids to kiss and hold hands and grow old together.

Adrigaminette

Yes, I know it'll never be canon. But I refuse to believe that they didn't realise people would ship it when they wrote the beginning of Heart Hunter. That whole sequence seems like it was designed to get me to ship it, and you know what? It succeeded.

Maribat aka Daminette

Kill it with fire.

Alyanette

We don’t have enough of this.

Alyadrien

People, including Zag, are sleeping on what a great platonic friendship pairing this could be. Just those two geeking out about how great Ladybug, Marinette, Nino and Carapace are.

Kagaminette

I have nothing but love for this pairing; I'm just including it here for completeness.

GabeNath

The problem with that ship is that I don’t want good things to happen to either of these people. Which means I'm perfectly okay with the canon version of this ship, where it's clear that both of them are emotionally stunted, callous and immoral and are never going to find happiness. The fact that it’s technically cheating only adds to that. I am not fond of fan versions where these two and Adrien are one happy family, though.

DJWifi

The pairing is perfect, but I have to say: Lady WiFi is cooler and fits better for Alya than Rena Rouge. Who ever thought to give the journalist the Miraculous that is all about lying and deception?

I’m very okay with Nino not being the Bubbler, though.

JuleRose

Come on Zag, they deserve to be unambiguously canon.

MarcNath

See JuleRose. Actually, I think when directly compared to JuleRose, they could really do with some more development, some more scenes of them together. I do ship it, but they seemed to have gotten the “official unacknowledged gay boys couple” almost out of nowhere.

MarcNath where Nath means Nathalie

I don’t think it would be a good idea at all, but the troll part in me (which is responsible for this post existing in the first place) thinks it might be worth exploring.

MariLila

We need more of this ultimate crack ship.

Adrigamilukanette

Get rid of Luka and then we’re talking.

Chloegami

I used to think it was a stupid idea but I’ve read a number of very well written slow-burn stories about them, so now I ship it.

Felinette

I don’t get it at all. I feel like I should write more about it in a post like this, but I'm mostly just baffled by its existence.

Lukagami

Kagami deserves better.

Juleka/Lila

I just saw that this tag exists, on a "here are my drabbles" fic that was last updated in 2018, before it got to the Juleka/Lila part, and now I’m both intrigued and frustrated.

Adrichat

Hah, you had almost forgotten about that, hadn’t you?

[damagedsmile]

//Hullo hullo everyone, just flying in here with an update & I apologise for taking so long about it.

So its been a tough time for everyone with C-19. Ireland is going into another lock down. I hope yall are taking care & regardless of your opinion on the matter, I hope yall are being respectful & safe.

Life has been abit topsy-turvy for me. Im learning that grief is just a series of moments where, when you least expect it, you spontaneously combust with tears. Ive had good days but a lot of days where it do be just hanging on by your nails & wondering when the rabbithole ends. So basically I'm at a point where I really don't know how I'm going to feel the next hour, the next day... yanno. I've had moments where I feel ready to return here & do something small but that feeling always changes to the opposite; I'm being careful with discerning what is a manic whim & what is real. I think that's a very important skill for anyone in this position or with mental health issues to learn, so im learning something new this past while.

I have not been able to write anything or draw for months now. Its very frustrating & depressing in itself as I am a creative person & often feel smothered when unable to create. I just have no energy or ideas & am very resentful of myself for feeling things that disrupt my hobbies. But I know i need to feel & go through this so am not pressuring myself. I'm focusing on keeping myself clean & fed & practicing good sleep hygiene; once I can master these three fundamentals, I can focus on other things.

Its funny, I think, that life experiences can alter you so much that you forget how to be human in that you find yourself forgetting to eat & unable to perform daily self-care routines & unable to show love towards those you know you love dearly. To sum it up, I think its fair to say this is the lowest point of my life & its been both horrible & eye-opening. I feel like a burn victim, without skin, everything hurting & tiresome & feeling seperate from myself & my former life. In that same perverse way, that part of me is abit thankful for c-19 because it means I don't have people coming close to me & hugging me & generally being sympathetic: I find im loathing that behaviour now. I don't want to be the person whom suffered a great loss that everyone needs to comfort, I just want to be a person that people treat like normal.

I opened the door the other day to a Traveller woman trying to sell me bedsheets & she said "ah take that, it'd be a grand present for your ma" to which I said, "my ma's dead". It was easier to say than I thought it would be & it was actually a relief to say it & receive a fumbling apology, "I'm sorry, my ma's dead too." I appreciated that more than receiving a hug or a pat on the back. Not that a stranger would do such things, but yanno. We had a moment like saluting each other & I bought pillows off her, the end.

I hope I'm making sense. I hope no one takes offence to this. This is just my feelings, my journey. I've been calling myself a child of grief, making this journey to a port in a storm where i can start a new life on that port & begin anew once I've shed this old skin thats dried out from salty tears.

I've been playing TS4. I started the Asylum Challenge on medium difficulty. I have Joker there ofc with 6 others. I did have 8 Sims but Jared Leto died in the pool (he went for a swim instead of sleeping ffs). We've had 1 Asylum baby that was adopted away for obvious reasons. Currently Enoby Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way is trying to get with Rob Zombie's creepy twin, Bob Zombie. Joker is hitting it off with my Sim whose aesthetic is inspired by Emilie Autumn. I called her Kathryn Wheel cuz of the torture device/HIM song.

I got two rat kittens for Valentines Day (not sure if I've told you before). They're Fancy Rats but with blue colouring, which I've never seen before in breeds. I called them MizPah & BoBoBetty. The Precious got a new snake, a BEL he calls Helvita but i call her Boo.

I got my hands tattooed a wee while ago which wasn't as painful as my neck but painful enough that I'm relieved theyre done & healed up. I'll try remember to post pics whenever. My memorys been a bit scatty with meds. Im also working on losing weight again so I've been very tired & grumpy when I'm not huddling in a nest of blankets growling at The Precious when he enters my space. The only way he earns my trust each eve is to give me coffee & tell me im being very good. Is this a joke? YOU be the judge...

Anyway. Im alive & still working on myself. I thank yall for your patience & support, it means a lot to me knowing my friends on here are rooting for me. I'm toasting yall rn with my iced coffee (still trying to perfect the recipe but im getting there). I hope yall are doing well & are happy, safe, & healthy. Remember I love yall & wish you all the very best, even if I'm not present or feeling sociable. We'll all get through this, i promise you. Remember that you only really see light when things are very dark 💜

[imthepunchlord]

For all the new things, I kinda wished they showed all of this before SwSh was released, now it's a bit more pricey and I feel like it's kinda rushed. Also for the Mystery Dungeon, I'm excited for that bit I really hope that include all the starters and non starters as well in the final.

I wish they went ahead and pushed back SaS so it’d be released 2020, with this expansion back already included, and the new places we go to can be unlocked during our adventure or as postgame. I would’ve fine waiting and would’ve preferred it, especially to give them a chance to do more with the main story which is pretty weak and made little sense, and Rose was a very forced in villain. Also made no sense in the story climax. Watching playthroughs and seeing the climax of SaS I’m just... 

Its also frustrating that you get to hear about things happening and not actually witness or help. Like, its nice having adults acknowledge that you’re a kid, don’t worry about it we’ll handle it, but at the same time, that’s a chunk of story we have a right to see, and we’re kids in this game, we don’t always do what adults say we should follow and see what’s going on. That could’ve been something optional. Go to event to see what’s happening or skip it to go to the next gym. 

And this is turning into a rant so I’m going to put this below. For those that just want to read my comments on Mystery Dungeon, scroll down till you get to the Pikachu gif, I’ll talk about it below. 

Also there could’ve been improvements with the rivals. Marnie is suuuuper intriguing and I love her, Bede I also like though that’s more me missing mean rivals and man, he’s a brat and I say that with affection. But in the grand scheme of things, they felt pointless. More could’ve been done to include them. And Hop. God, Hop. I know people like him, but from what I’ve seen, he seems like the most annoying “friend rival” made to date. He does not know what personal space is. He waits for you in front of gyms. He waits for you on new routes. He has to comment on almost every move you make in your fights with him. 

I don’t even own the games but just from the playthroughs I’ve watched I’m just... go away. Leave the lead alone. Everywhere you turn, he’s there, waiting for you. It also feels like he only got endorsed because he’s Leon’s younger brother. There’s nothing about him that I like. And, I don’t know why he gets the other wolf legendary? What makes him worthy?What makes him want to be a Professor in the future? That’s out of nowhere. 

Something more could’ve been done with Hop, maybe an arc of him resenting you a little because every match you beat him, and he’s the Champion’s younger brother and you just seem to stay ahead. Maybe let us have more scene of him talking with Sonia since he’s going to be her future assistant. If he’s going to be constantly stalking us and waiting for us, then yeah, let’s at least better build up where his character will go. 

Then there’s the issue of pokemon. With it pretty much confirmed they just reused models from gen 7, yeah, there’s no reason to not include more pokemon. If not the National Dex, which wouldn’t bother me too much, then go ahead and add about half. At most, I’d love pokemon included that would make the most sense. Like, lion is a big symbol throughout all of Europe. There should be a lion in Galar, either Litleo or Shinx returning if not a new lion pokemon. And with the expansion packs, yeah, they’re already adding 200 each pack. 

And a lot of this dlc should already be in the game. If 400 pokemon are going to be added in, they should already be there. The new Giga forms should already be there and we should’ve seen the Giga Venusaur and Blastoise the same time as Charizard. 

I’m also salty that there’s no going to Kalos. Maybe it’ll be a future expansion, and that’s a dlc I wouldn’t mind, but those are two very linked countries they’re based on. And Galar truly isn’t a big region. The Wild Area isn’t as big as it could be. Like, it doesn’t have to be BotW big, but it could’ve been bigger than what we got. And if not expanding the Wild Area, we could’ve had Kalos as a new region to go to, and more gyms for us to do. 

ALSO.

I am not a fan of you refacing the gyms and having them act as your “Elite Four”. 

They’ve already been fought. Aside from the first two, you’ve already fought all the star Giga forms they have. Its a really lazy decision. At least, you can have the two first gym leaders come in since you didn’t fight their star Giga forms, and include the other two version exclusive gym leaders as the other two. Just for some freshness in this final challenge. 

I know they’re not big on voice acting, but, they should’ve put some form of VA into these games. Its a little awkward to get animated cutscenes and there’s no voices coming forth. And its at its worst when you get to Piers and you see him singing away, I presume loudly, into his mic and its just awkward cause there’s no voice and you can hear him tapping his foot to the music and its just so off putting to watch cause something is missing: a voice! And you know what’s the kicker? Pokemon has included voice acting before. 

undefined

There is no reason to not do something similar, at least for Piers’ intro so its not so awkward to watch. 

And then post game... the official post game... I, I honestly can’t say what is even going on? Those two blonde bimbos, those designs, who agreed to pass them? For sword guy, I don’t know whether I should be laughing or uncomfortable. Its like, an in between especially when his hair flops around. Also, their reasoning, they’re causing chaos in Galar because they didn’t like a book Sonia wrote??? 

The villains in these games are just so dumb.

Like, Rose had a good motive but, he is still forced in. And he activates the climax for no reason. He was promised by Leon that he would help with Eternatus, all he had to do was wait through one match. One match that would’ve been 30 minutes at most, roughly. Yet he couldn’t wait for one match and went ahead and woke up Eternatus, does a video asking for help, and when you arrive, stops you for a battle that doesn’t make sense to have cause he asked for help why is he holding you up with a battle?? 

And Team Yell. Supposed to be like, a 2nd Team Skull and these guys could dream to live up to Team Skull. They can’t. They’re not funny or enjoyable at all. And my friend brought up a good point on the issue of having Team Yell based on punks when they’re supposed to be the “villainous” team. Punks, historically, were rebelling against an unfair system, they were progressive and revolutionary. They stood up for LBGT rights, they stood for having individual freedom, and just wanted to break the restrictions society wanted to place on people, let people express themselves and be who they want to be. 

If you want Team Yell to be a 2nd Skull and play around with punks as their theme, then they should’ve been set up to be red herrings as well. Be wary at first and then later find that they have hearts of gold, and mean well, even if they can be a tad extreme sometimes. And maybe they can help build up the danger of Rose, who in turn wants to paint them in with a bad image since they’re going against him and what’s normal in society. 

Anyway... Sword and Shield honestly should’ve been pushed back. They should’ve been saved for 2020, or even 2021, or however how much time they need. I would’ve been fine waiting. A lot of fans would be. But what we got wasn’t worth the $60 it was being sold at, and definitely not worth the $90 its being sold at with the expansion packs, and as far as I know, these are very, very small areas to explore. Cause as we’ve seen with SaS, they built it up to be big and grand and, well, the Wild Area was smaller than expected and the whole was far shorter than expected. You could beat it in 20 hours roughly. 

I even have mixed feelings on there being no enhanced version, cause these games do have potential, they just needed more time and polish, and then it could’ve worth the $60 price. But also thankful that there’s not another 2nd version and we may be getting a few expansion packs instead. 

Though I do think a lot they’re bringing in should already be in the game. 

Anyway, enough ranting about Sas, onto Mystery Dungeon!

Demo I think could’ve been a little longer, they stop you before you go on the Skarmory mission, I think it could’ve been a better placement to end after the Skarmory mission. 

Anyway, I like the changes so far. I love you can choose a different pokemon if you don’t like what you got from the test. I love that you have an updated move pool, though I feel kinda OP but you also kinda need it for these games cause I remember them being so hard and as a starter that can’t evolve till like, post game, yeah you’re going to need that help. I love that you get to wear a little scarf. Design wise, a little weird at first but it grew on me. Kinda reminds me of Okami. 

By trailer, for sure they’re adding more pokemon in. Lucario is seen in the team, when before, you only saw Lucario as a statue in Red Blue, I believe? Its been a long time. But they only had Gen 1-3 in RB, and Lucario is there so I would think they’d add in a lot more pokemon. 

For starters, I’m hopeful that beating the game, if you replay, you’ll get more options for the starters to play as and have as your partner. I’d loooove to have a chance to play as Popplio. Mega Evolution is confirmed, I wonder if regional forms would also be playable, like if we could evolve into Alolan Marowak or be one of the other two regional Meowths. Otherwise, everyone you could be in the old game is there, with no gender restriction! You can be a female Cubone! A male Eevee! A female Cyndaquil! I’m so happy about that since as a kid, I wanted to play Cyndaquil but never got it in the test and had to look it up and was bummed that it was male only and I wanted to be a girl. 

My biggest hope though is that with this, we’ll have a chance to play two player, since you have a team of two usually, and your friend or sibling or SO can play your partner. 

I am pleasantly surprised with it so far, though I will be holding off when its released in a few months, just going to listen to all reviews once they beat the game and if its very positive, cause SaS had a strong start and then went down hill with Gamefreak rushing it and cutting corners. I’m hopeful for this remake but cautious still. 

[thejosh1980]

Update #21 – 1 week at “The Ocean Shores Resort”

Update #21 ��� 1 week at “The Ocean Shores Resort”

A week ago we left quarantine in Adelaide!!!

It's been another week of mixed emotions, but I have to say, for the first time in months, they've been mostly on the positive side of things.

Last Tuesday, we left the hotel without too much hassle. They'd given us a basic breakfast the night before to have first thing and they called us down early; luckily we were ready and down the stairs we went. Before you know it, we were in the hotel reception taking our masks off!

Adelaide and South Australia are COVID free, so no masks, no problems.

The checkout was quick (the big bill comes in a few weeks!!), the staff were awesome and the police informative. They all understand that quarantine is not easy on anyone, and they were patient with our questions and worries. We had won the jackpot of quarantine hotels: Pullman Adelaide and the staff helped make our stay tolerable.

Jumped in a taxi (with masks on cause we really weren't sure yet how to behave in the outside world) and off to the airport. We had to leave the hotel by 07:30, because another bus of incoming “Covicts” were coming in that morning. Our flight was at 11:50 up to Brisbane, so it was yet another waiting game to check in and fly. But first... coffee! (we actually bought a coffee from a coffee shop! Amazing!! It's the small things...).

The flight was about about 2/3's full, no masks.

Landing in Brisbane we had to do a border check, show our papers, explain where we had been and all that. The check was there to stop anyone who may have COVID from coming in without quarantining. Each State has slightly different rules, and they do change from time to time, depending on hotspots and COVID numbers. Because the flight was from Adelaide and we left the hotel directly to the airport, we made sure we had no problems entering Brisbane (Queensland). We definitely didn't want any chance of another 14 day hotel stay!!!

Our original plan was to fly into the Gold Coast airport, which is only about 35 minutes from Mum, but there were no flights on our leaving day, so we had to fly into Brisbane (which is 2 hours from Mum's). My cousin picked us up (bloody legend!). We were hungry, and we went directly to Yatala pies. This was the moment I started to realize we were almost home. The taste of home! (Yatala Pies is a well known bakery south of Brisbane, a regular stop for many).

My cousin could drive us as far as the QLD/NSW border. Once there, we walked across the border and Dave picked us up on the other side. A little complicated, but sure enough, the plan worked.

The whole experience felt like something out of the movies. Not that it was all “Hollywood”. It was more like: I can't believe this is finally happening. I wasn't really in the moment. Yet.

As we were getting close to “The Ocean Shores Resort” (which is the name we have for my Mum's house) I still didn't feel calm...

Anyhow, we arrived, and if you've seen our IG or FB Story on the day, you'd know that when I knocked on the front door, we had actually surprised Mum (a little early), and she couldn't find the front door key to let us in!! So our reunion started off with a scream and eventually a laugh!!

Mum did cry, but we all expected her to cry more... ;) Honestly, I think we both had cried too much the past 2 months, it was no longer needed. It was all about joy and happiness.

After meeting and hugging Alex (some more tears) we entered the house to find Mum had a “welcome home” sign and our picture up on the walls (lots of me and Alex, can't go wrong with that!!).

It was surreal.

A quick house tour for Alex and we settled down. Lots of chatting and catching up to do, and a roast dinner!

We'd made it.

The next morning (Wednesday), a son's work is never done and I was up early to take Mum to school. She's part of the support unit inside the primary school, working with kids with Autism.

Even though her eyesight is deteriorating, Mum can still work. Driving a car; that's out of the question. Reading the “use by date” on a packet of chips is almost impossible. Keeping an eye on children in the playground, developing their social skills or helping them with their school work (considering the text is usually quite large and the pictures bold) Mum can still do really well.

I've learnt she has figured out ways to cope with her eyes. She has a great memory, so once she's told something, she can remember it really well (like recipes for cooking etc). She's still a keen bargain hunter when it comes to shopping. I enjoy learning that she's kept her life as close to “normal” as possible, making small changes to the bigger things to keep her independence.

But it's those small things that are hard to do alone, which is why I'm here...

After dropping Mum off, Alex and I spent the morning of our first full day in Brunswick Heads. This is the town I lived in from the mid 80's until late 90's. I went to primary school here, learned to surf here, and know the old names of the shops (the hair dressers is now a surf shop, the butcher's is a cafe, the ice cream shop is a real estate agent and the bank has recently closed). Lots of changes for me, lots of new things for Alex.

We also went down to the beach, the south wall of the Brunswick River, where the river meets the ocean. We watched some waves. Taking in the salt air (I don't think I ever realized how salty the air is here until now).

It was a relaxing day.

But I still wasn't quite “here” in my head and heart. Leaving Dresden back in July, only to be delayed for 7 weeks, then another 2 weeks in quarantine, was going to take sometime to overcome.

Time to pick up Mum from school... Home... Unpack a little, dinner, chatting and a little TV.

Thursday morning, it was time for another radio interview. To finish off the 3 part story with ABC North Coast Radio I did another live interview with Joanne Shoebridge. I'm always nervous doing these kinds of things, even though in the music world, I've had to do interviews, they were never quite as personal as this.

After we dropped Mum off at school Thursday morning, we drove up to the Cape Byron Lighthouse and luckily got a park up close to the top.

I wanted to introduce Alex to the area as much as I could, without overwhelming her. Brunswick Heads, Ocean Shores, Mullumbimby and Byron Bay all played a big part of my childhood, and I wanted her to at least know these villages a little bit as early as possible. We'd covered Brunswick Heads and Ocean Shores a little, so now it was time for Byron Bay.

Bring on the whale watching!!

Within minutes of leaving the car, we could see whales jumping out and swimming around the cape. It was a wonderful morning. I'm so glad Alex got to see them (in fact I can't remember the last time I saw whales so close to the shore). They migrate each year around September/October, so it was perfect timing.

It was a special day for Alex...

The sun was shining, the whales were in plain sight and the tourists were kind enough to stay away from Byron Bay. COVID does have its benefits. Fewer people in these tourist spots isn't always bad (although I am quite aware the economy is suffering. The borders are opening up next week and it'll be very busy then).

Back into Ocean Shores, picked up Mum from school. Home... Dinner.. Chatting... Some TV...

Friday was the first day we had to do “stuff” in regards to living here permanently, and that was banking. So after dropping mum off at work, we drove into Mullumbimby “The Biggest Little Town In Australia”. I went to high school here.

Basically Brunswick Heads and Mullumbimby are like Neustadt in Dresden. You can't walk down the street without seeing someone you know, stopping and chatting. It happened in Brunz the other day, I literally parked my car, and lo and behold an old high school friend came out of the video store to say hi... Or in Mullum, as we arrive at the bank I see an old friend who used to teach me rock n roll dancing (yeah, I can still cut a rug)... and even inside the bank, I said hi to a fella from my high school year, we hadn't seen each other since 1997.

It's a small world...

The banking took a bit longer than expected, after much back and forward we settled on our new bank accounts and how to arrange things going forward. While I've had an account here since I was very very young, I cancelled most of my stuff when I left in 2002, so now it was time to set up shop again, especially since I had my wife with me and we have a future to work towards...

We walked the street of Mullum, grabbed a coffee and we let the country hippy vibe soak in. Alex commented on how many folks don't wear shoes here and she can't believe how many new coffee shops there are for her to try (there's a lot more than when I was a kid).

Picked up Mum from school... School holidays for 2 weeks! Yippeee!!

Home... Dinner... Chatting... some TV...

Over the weekend we sorted out things around the house. Set up better internet Wifi around the house, the pool is in good condition after the winter sleep, cupboards got cleaned out and we unpacked and the car was washed (first time I've hand washed a car in over a decade!).

Sunday I watched Mark's live stream (from his front porch in upstate New York) and I felt inspired (he does that to me). So I am considering live streaming next week. I have a guitar and good internet, so why not? I just have to find time to practice ;) I'm thinking net Sunday evening here, which would be Sunday lunch time in Germany. If I don't get to it this Sunday, then maybe next Sunday... I'll keep you posted.

Overall the weather has been warm, often over 20 degrees. But the mornings are still quite chilly, with frosty dew on the golf course out back. It's not bad for coming out of winter...

Today, Monday, we went “up the coast”, to Tweed Heads.

First thing we tried to exchange my German license for a mandatory NSW (State) license, unfortunately I gotta wait for some back checks, no idea what I did 19 years ago in Melbourne, but they wanna check it out. So onwards to shopping...

Yes!!! We bought a coffee machine! Finally we can wake and with a press of a button get ourselves a cup of joe. It's the small things....

Helped mum with the grocery shopping. She knows her stuff. She knows where everything is in every shop, but sometimes she just needs me to reassure her what is actually written on the box or package!!!

So that's basically our first week...

We are settling in well. Alex and Mum get on like a house on fire. I often can't get a word in edgewise and I'm always outvoted!

I still miss Germany and I still miss Europe... (I always will). I miss a lot of the “past life”, but that's just cause Australia has moved on without me these past 18 years. Each day here I get a little closer to that homey feeling I used to have as a teenager (when I didn't know better).

In hindsight, the past 3 months wasn't too bad... We survived... But that's easy to say now...

When we were in the middle of it, it was really tough.

It was really hard packing up our lives into boxes. It was emotionally draining saying goodbye after goodbye to our wonderful friends. Playing my goodbye show was one of the musical highlights of my life, even if it was one of the saddest.

Then we were ready to leave...

As you all know, that didn't go according to plan.

That's when the really bad feelings crept in. You know it's one thing to know you gotta pack up and say goodbye to leave (you are prepared for that)... It's another when you're ready and the world says “nope, not yet”... and again and again that build up and let down was happening, and until the last 2 weeks in Germany, we had no idea why!

As some of you know, I'm not really good at spontaneity. I'm not good when the plan changes... It was tough... But...

When we took control of the situation and booked new flights, it helped a lot. We were back in control.

Quarantine was a difficult time, it got a little dark there. It brought with it, it's own set of challenges and a steep learning curve. I, for one, learnt a lot about pressure. I put too much pressure on myself. Since we arrived here, I have tried my best to relax more, in my own way at least. My to do lists are shorter...

Alex and I had already figured out how to survive the German lockdown, the packing up of our lives and clearing out the apartment. Then we had 2 months at her parents stuck in “limbo” and then 2 weeks stuck in a room together. Our marriage is really new, and we survived that without any damage to our relationship. Sure, we both have a few personal scars, but nothing a little love and tenderness wont fix. I'm proud of her, Alex has a lot of patience for me!

I'm really happy I am here to help Mum each day. Those small things will slowly become bigger things, but for now, it's great to be able to do “stuff” with her. That was always the plan, to be here in time, before things got really bad.

We've been posting often on our IG and FB stories, so I hope folks have seen the day to day happenings. I'm sure we'll continue with that, keeping you up to date visually.

I think I'll end these FB journals here, and switch over to Tumblr full time. The idea being that if you'd like to continue to read these long “new life” chronicles, I'll still post a link here when I do update there... Confused? Me too! ;)

Thanks everyone for your messages of support and love. We are very lucky, we have the best friends.... You guys rock! You're awesome! We love you.

Love

Josh and @dauntlesscoffee

[venus-says]

Life update and some other things!

I'm sorry, the old Venus can't come to the phone right now... Why?... Oh, 'cause he's dead!

Yes, you're not having a hallucination, I'm indeed back with the blog. I mean, I'm not completely back yet, but I'm in the process of coming back.

So, you may be asking (or not) why I've bee away for an entire month and well this post is to tell what happened.

I was trying to keep a schedule of posts because I'm a madman and I thought that having consistency in the form of posting daily would be a great idea and that the world would conspire in my favor and would let that happen while having two huge long term projects coexisting. It happens that life isn't as kind and it came to bite me in the ass for trying to do too much stuff at the same time.

There wasn't necessarily one specific thing that lead me to take a break, it was more like a conversion of bad things happening at the same time in my personal life that really worn me down to an estate of deep sadness and exhaustion, and to my luck, all of that decided to happen at the same time as quarantine started in Brazil which brought a lot of tension, a huge political mess, and a whole lot of anxiety as our current president and his supporters seem to not care for the well being of the population thinking that the virus is just a made-up thing to make him and his government look bad. And don't even get me started in the whole lot of unconstitutional stuff has been happening, and that apparently no one in our justice system seems to care, that just makes the fear of us falling into another dictatorial regime after only 35 years of being back into living in a democracy hunt me in my dreams at night.

As you can see, this hasn't been the happiest of times.

And it just gets worse because the things that were supposed to help me in escaping from this terrifying reality actually only made me feel worse. First, because I couldn't just sit down and watch them, I had to watch and write about them, which was something I honestly had no energy to do. And second, because I wasn't exactly happy with the shows themselves, you know? I was really done with Prichan after the another!Daia arc, Zero-One had been constantly making me angry, all of the problems I had with Precure 5 seemed to only have been exacerbated into extreme levels in GoGo, Kamen Rider Ghost's 2nd and 3rd arc were just ghastly, and On Parade... well, was On Parade. Only Healin' Good was genuinely making me happy but even that I tried to avoid because I was very afraid of my mood ruining my experience with the show and turning something I really enjoyed into something that I hated.

And I know that it seems that I'm that salty bitch who loves to hate things just for the sake of it and that I should be thriving if I was seeing a lot of problems in the shows I was watching, but that's very far from the truth, I actually hate talking about bad things. Because the franchises I cover here are things that I love, I mean, this is a personal blog where I tell my PERSONAL experiences as I watch these shows, and as things that I love I want all of them to be good and I wanna say good things about them, but I can't come here and fake saying that I loved something and I had the greatest time ever because it would go against what this blog is about. Also faking enthusiasm is just as mentally exhausting as being honest and talking shit about stuff so that wouldn't really solve any of my problems.

So, in a self-preservation move, I step away from this blog and I indulged myself in a whole bunch of shit that wasn't anime in order to get me up and running again while I try to forget the problems of the world. I've listened to a shit-ton of podcasts, I've done some gaming (which is something that I barely do), obviously I cleaned and cooked a lot (like most of the people in quarantine are doing), and I've even got back into reading which was something that I haven't really done since my tablet broke like two years ago. Gosh, I even found out I actually like musicals and I've been watching recordings of shows on youtube non-stop and that has brought me a lot of joy (and I believe a lot of headaches to my neighbors). Heck, I even got to watch a few of the anime that just started in the most recent season and even got to find some new faves, so that break time was really helpful in making my mind drift away from all the negativities and the bad energy that was lurking around.

Of course, I'm still not 100% back, I'm still feeling very tired and my sense of time is all messed up, but I'm feeling better and I'm feeling renewed so I thought it was the time to slowly get back with the blog. And you can call me weird here, but it didn't feel right to be back with new energies and a new vibe and continue with the same dumb name for the blog. Like, I know this is a dumb thing to be hung on, but I gotta be honest I was never fully happy with my usernames that I've used in the past two~three years. I think CureCupid is a dumb name and venus-moonrise is even dumber, and I've been wanting to rebrand for a long ass time but I'm not a creative hoe and I couldn't think of a better name that wouldn't sound silly as hell and it wouldn't include the words venus, moon, and fairy, in any shape or form.

But I thought about it and realized that there wouldn't be any other time as perfect as this one to change my URLs, because I already lost the timing once when I stopped making gifs at CureCupid and I had that huge ass break in the blog before I came back to it in August last year, and since I'm with renewed energies would be very conflicting to keep going while having this thing with a dark aura around bringing me enjoyment down. And so I changed my usernames, I'm sorry for making you all confused, but I needed a concrete change.

And that's not the only change happening. Forget the daily posts, I may try that again in the future, but not for now. Until my gears are grinding to their full capacities I will post whenever I want, but whenever I get ready to have a schedule again I will post only 4 days of the week because if there's a thing that this period has taught me is that I need to consume other things that aren't precure, aikatsu, and kamen rider, so that I don't go crazy. So there's that.

Finally to conclude this long-ass post I would like to thank you all for still keeping up with me even though I'm a terrible content creator. I don't know if people on tumblr are aware but I have a WordPress blog that is basically the same thing as the tumblr just with more screenshots of the episodes and that blog hasn't had a single day with 0 visitors even though I haven't posted in the past 38 days and I'm really grateful for that and I hope that from now on I can match up with this support.

I'm not sure when I'll be back with the weekly show reviews, thankfully for the purposes of this blog almost all shows I cover are in hiatus due to COVID-19 so I can catch up with them easily without feeling pressured. But before that I decided that I'll do a monthly faves post to come out sometime during this week, is not necessarily a post with only my favorite things of the month, I just got inspired by Pixielocks video and I wanted to do something to talk about the things I watched during the break and it's something I want to become a regular thing for the blog so I have another incentive to watch other things without the need of commitment.

Well, I've written way more than I needed but I'm glad I was finally able to put this out, it may seem like a silly thing but it really made me feel better to be able to open up about stuff. Thank you so much for reading, be safe, take care of yourself, happy mother's day (!!!), and I hope I can meet you in the next time. Bye-bye.

[istheresomebodywhocanimagine]

Late Nights, Early Mornings (PT. 1)

anonymous said: Anything w/ Bri cause he’s the cutest please xxx

(a/n: I actually wrote this a while ago and figured no one on here would like it but since it’s a multi-part brian piece and we luv brian, I might as well post it. buckle in, girls and gays. I have part 2 mostly fleshed out, its just a matter of finishing it. should be up in a few days hehe)

“What kind of all-nighter is this if Brian isn’t fucking here?” Roger asked irritably, sitting behind his drumset in his room off of the main recording area. “Wah wah, boo hoo, I’m tired! So am I! What makes him special?”

You sighed, trying not to laugh at how Roger looked when he was angry. Despite the rage, he still looked like a small animal on the defensive.

“I suppose I can swing by his flat and see if he’s still awake?” you offered, wanting desperately to get away from Roger anyways. Also, going to see Brian would brighten up your day a bit. He was quickly becoming your favorite of the group, Roger being a lot to handle on the daily while Brian was relatively low maintenance and very sweet when you got him alone. 

Giving you a nod, Roger continued to look sour as he returned his focus to the drumset, and when you turned around, John was giving you a look that said ‘Why do you put up with him?’

“I’ll go along with Y/N,” Freddie offered, but someone pointed out that he still had to do some testing before they started recording. Giving you a sad look, Freddie apologized and sent you out on your own to retrieve Brian. You didn’t mind, anyways. You needed some fresh air, and Brian’s flat wasn’t too far from the studio, so you opted to walk.

Along the way, you stopped for some coffee, and when you showed up to Brian’s door, you found it unlocked. Carefully balancing the coffee in one arm and hand, you knocked on the door before letting yourself in, at least giving him some semblance of a warning.

“Bri?” you called out, shutting the door behind you and sitting the coffees on the counter before wandering through his lounge to get to the hallway. You heard something in the bedroom, so you went up to the door and knocked softly.

“One moment,” was Brian’s soft reply from the other side of the door, so you returned to the lounge and plopped down on the couch, laying your head back and closing your eyes to get a tiny bit of rest. After a minute, he walked out into the lounge, and you opened your eyes to see his tall, lanky figure, his hands working on buttoning his shirt. He was still in his jeans from today, but he looked like he’d just started getting ready for bed.

“Christ, now I almost feel bad,” you blurted out, looking at him guiltily. Your heart clenched a bit, partly because you felt terrible for him and partly because he admittedly looked kind of cute like this. Very homey. “Forget I was here, I’ll just tell Roger to suck it up for a night and record without the guitar.”

“Roger throwing a fit?” Brian asked, giving a half-hearted smile as he looked over to the counter, rubbing the deep five-o’clock shadow that was forming on his jaw. “And you brought coffee – I assume I’m being summoned?”

You nodded, smiling a bit sheepishly and scooting over as he grabbed his shoes and came over to sit down so he could pull them on. He moved a bit slower than usual as he tied them, quite sleep-deprived from last night’s session with just him and Freddie recording. You’d come along with Roger tonight for moral support, seeing as you were usually just their tour audio engineer and you were on break for a while since they wanted you fresh for their tour coming up. He’d convinced you to come so you could give your famous shoulder rubs if he got sore, and he promised to buy you drinks as payment.

“Since I feel like I could pass out right here, can you grab my little black journal from my bed in my room? It’s got my notes for the recordings in it.” You nodded, getting up and heading to his bedroom to grab it really quick as he grabbed a coat and Red Special.

When you got to his room, you found it a mess, but decided against chastising him for it and instead made your way over to his bed. The problem you encountered when you got there was that there were two little black journals, so you grabbed both and decided to ask questions later. Joining him in the lounge again as you put the journals in your pocket, you grabbed the coffees before both of you made the short trek back to the studio. Upon entering, Roger make an exaggerated noise of surprise.

“I thought you were too tired!” he sneered, earning a smack on the back of the head from you in response. You handed Brian his coffee as Roger pouted, and produced the first of the two journals, which he seemed to recognize as his notes, so you left the other in your pocket.

“Good evening to you too, Rog,” Brian replied, his voice softer but still salty.

“Brian, darling, come here for a second. I want to get your opinion on this,” Freddie interjected, not letting any more bickering start tonight. John gave you another one of his looks, then kept fiddling with his bass.

You perched on the back of the couch, sipping your coffee as you watched everyone do their thing, Brian hovering over whatever Freddie was looking at near the tapes. Roger came over and placed himself between your legs, sitting back against you before looking up at you.

“How’d you convince him to come?” Roger asked, just loud enough for you to hear. “Did you use your magic lady powers?” he teased, making weird sparkly finger hand gestures.

“Coffee,” you replied simply, raising your cup before taking another sip. “You do know that if Freddie and him are here tonight, they won’t be tomorrow night?”

Roger groaned, looking forward towards the recording booth and resting his head against your left thigh. “We’re never going to get this record done,” he lamented.

“You will, these things just take time, drama queen.” Roger grumbled incoherently at your little name for him, and you sat your coffee to the side as you began to braid a small section of the back of his hair. He closed his eyes and let you do it, Brian soon finishing whatever Freddie was needing and joining you both on the couch so he could get Red Special ready.

“Am I next?” Freddie chuckled, referring to Roger’s braid that you were wrapping in rubber band you had around your wrist. You smiled softly, finishing up the braid before looking up at Freddie and scrutinizing his hair.

“I suppose I could give you all a braid, though I’m not sure Deacon would enjoy it.” John chuckled a bit at that, shaking his head as he sat his bass to the side. You then looked at Brian, and pursed your lips as you rested a hand on the top of his head. “And I’m not sure how I could even navigate this.”

Brian hummed with amusement, looking up at you and giving you a small smile before continuing his work on Red Special. “Good luck,” was all he said, scooting forward to give you room to sit behind him. You moved over so that he was now resting between your legs instead of Roger. Chewing your lip in concentration, you starting trying to figure out what hair was even the same length.

As you figured this out, they were finally ready to record, so you pouted as you had to give up on Brian’s hair for now. “Promise you’ll come back so I can actually braid it,” you stated, holding out your pinky. Brian smiled lopsidedly, his eyes crinkling up a bit and making him look not so exhausted as he pinky-promised you.

You slid down to sit on the regular part of the couch, pulling what you recognized as Freddie’s coat over you and laying down. They began recording sections of a song Freddie and Brian had partially constructed the night before, and you didn’t realize how tired you truly were until you woke up to the sound of the door opening, only Freddie walking in. You sat up for a moment and let him sit down where your head was, then you rested your head on his thigh and got comfortable again.

“What’d I miss?” you asked drowsily, yawning a bit. Freddie shook his head, also yawning and stretching a bit.

“Not much. I’m just resting my pipes a bit. Go back to sleep, lovie,” he said, starting to attempt to braid your hair in an effort to keep himself awake.

“Bollocks, I know it was in here,” you could hear Brian over the intercom, and you could just see him rifling through his notebook for something he missed in the last run through. Remembering the notebook in your pocket, you pulled it out and you were about to get up to offer it to him over the intercom when Freddie made you stop in your tracks.

“Why on Earth have you got Brian’s journal?” he asked, looking at the little black book in your hands like it was a precious crown jewel. “He wouldn’t even let me peek at that on tour and he just gives it to you?”

You shook your head, suddenly afraid of the journal, so you handed it to Freddie. “I grabbed it off his bed, it looked like his other journal and I didn’t know which was which. Am I in deep shit, Fred?”

Freddie started rifling through the pages, apparently unbothered by the fact that he was intruding on Brian’s personal thoughts. Your question went unanswered as he started mumbling words to himself, reading a passage halfway out loud.

“This is from last night, my God,” Freddie stopped to observe, pointing to the date. “This man updates his journal religiously, I haven’t even looked at mine in weeks because of this damned record.” You tried to subdue your curiosity about what he had to say about last night, seeing as you’d thought it was mostly an uneventful night. Freddie started reading some of it out loud, though, which only piqued your interest. “Had a late night recording with Fred, Y/N, and some others. We got a few of the songs started and knocked one out, but the one took forever because Fred kept being a tart.”

You burst out laughing at Freddie’s face when he read that, a look of pure insult spreading across his features. Quickly throwing a hand over your mouth, you apologized quickly. “Keep reading though,” you urged, wanting to hear what Brian had to say about Freddie’s little fits he had last night.

“He wanted to redo the same part over and over, and we were all getting tired of it. I asked him what was wrong with it and he went on and on about not being able to feel out that part of the song because of my guitar playing. Y/N thought it was quite a hoot, she looked quite…” Freddie trailed off, suddenly snapping the journal closed and shoving it down his shirt so you couldn’t get it. “That’s enough of that,” he said quietly, avoiding eye contact and crossing his arms.

“What the fuck, Freddie?” you asked, trying not to be too loud as the sound tech at the board talked to Brian through the mic. “What did it say?”

“It said Brian thinks I’m a tart, that’s it,” Freddie replied, evading the subject and refusing to look at you. You scowled, then started tickling Freddie, who yelled out in surprise and then started writhing and laughing, trying to keep you from getting the journal but failing miserably. You had your hand up his shirt, just getting ahold of the book when you heard John’s voice come over the speaker.

“You alright, you two?” he asked, both him and Brian standing at the window that was between you and them. Oh shit.

PT. 2 PT. 3

[smoochcal]

numb without you (part four)

a/n: I am trying to update this series as often as I can and luckily his week my work load has not been that much but please understand if I don’t update this series every day it is purely because I am busy with school and other things not because I did not want to update. that being said, thank you so much for your constant love and support. I might change my update schedule to be that I start writing the next part when the previous part gets 25 notes because as of right now part three has 14 notes and I am sure we can get that to 25 easily if everyone who reads this sends the link to their friends or reblogs :) please please please inbox me your feedback because I would love to hear from you guys on how you like (or don’t like) my writing style and how often I update etc. once I figure out how to make a tag list I can definitely tag any of my active readers if possible. I am still quite new to posting original content on tumblr so I will also try to get a masterlist link up soon and post the previous part in the beginning of this series. thank you for your continuous support of this series and my writing and if you want to have me write something different about any of the other 5sos boys just inbox me and I will try to write a blurb based off what info you give me :) happy reading!

pairing: readerxluke

word count: 1.7 k

summary: you go to your first doctor’s appointment to get more information on what is happening, and some surprise visitors join you

playlist: numb without you by the maine, high hopes by panic! at the disco

rating: PG-13

warnings: swearing, doctor’s visit, soft soft soft

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Y/N’s POV:

Just another Monday morning, that’s all today is. Yeah you aren’t going to work, but that should be something you celebrate not sulk over. You just know that today will definitely confirm what you have suspected. You will for sure be told by your doctor that you are pregnant today in the matter of a few hours, actually. Calum said he would go with you. He’s been calling every day to check up on you. You don’t necessarily mind him checking up on you, it is just kind of weird considering you two have never really been that close. This is something Luke should be doing. You hate to compare them, but that is all you can think about right now.

Luke hasn’t talked to you since Thursday night when he found out exactly what is going on between you and Calum. You hate that you left things the way you did but you can’t really change that considering he hasn’t answered your calls or texts or multiple FaceTimes. You suppose you could go and see him at his place, but you don’t know his schedule and you hate showing up to places unannounced and uninvited. You do miss him though. More than anything. I mean the two of you are best friends. You can’t even remember the last time you and Luke had gone this long without talking to one another. And you are pretty sure that is what hurts the most. The fact that in any other circumstance he would be the one by your side through all of this. The doctor appointments, the morning sickness, the midday naps, all of it.

You shake the thought from your mind and look in your closet to find something to wear. Calum said he would meet you at the OBGYN’s office ten minutes before the scheduled appointment. That gives you twenty minutes before you have to leave your apartment. You don’t even bother to put on makeup, and you dress yourself in a pair of leggings and a flowy shirt. You aren’t showing yet, but you want to be careful just in case. Not like anyone at this kind of a doctor’s office would care if you were showing. You mainly dressed this way to give yourself some peace of mind. You brush your teeth quickly and put on a pair of tennis shoes before grabbing your car keys and heading over to meet Calum at the appointment.

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Calum’s POV:

I can’t believe him. Actually, no I can. Of course, Luke would do something like this. I know that he is her best friend or whatever, but he doesn’t get to swoop in and save the day at this doctor’s appointment. Especially not after he has spent the past four days ignoring Y/N. She doesn’t deserve that. She doesn’t deserve any of this. I was so stupid. A stupid mistake that is now going to effectively ruin both of our lives. It doesn’t matter that I’ve always had a soft spot for kids. Or that I have always had a small crush on Y/N. We aren’t going to ponder that last bit.

Anyway, here I am about to get in the car and meet Y/N at the doctor when Hemmings shows up at my doorstep waiting for me to leave my house. He gave me a whole speech on how he needs to be there for her just as much as I need to be there for the baby. Which I personally think is a load of bullshit, but he literally stood in front of my car and didn’t let me go anywhere until I let him come with me. He hasn’t returned her calls or messages, but sure he’s allowed to show up unannounced and uninvited to the first doctor’s appointment. Sure, she’s going to forgive him right on the spot like he hasn’t been a complete ass to her these past couple days when she needed him most.

He keeps flipping between the various radio stations just to add to how obnoxious he is being. I know he is supposed to be a good friend of mine and all, but I really cannot stand him this morning. He is singing along to High Hopes by Panic! at the Disco as it was on the station Luke finally landed on during his channel surfing. I’m driving fairly quick trying to get to the appointment exactly ten minutes before it starts like I told Y/N I would. I would have been perfectly on time without driving like a maniac if it wasn’t for mister save the day now sitting in my passenger seat. I wish I wasn’t so angry at him, but I honestly have every reason to be.

Finally, I pull into a parking spot and am walking up the steps of the hospital where I am supposed to meet Y/N with Luke following close behind me.

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Y/N’s POV:

You can’t believe your eyes. Calum met me at the hospital just like he promised, but what he failed to mention is that the person of the hour, Luke, would be joining us. In any other circumstance you would be elated to see Luke here, but not today. Not here, not now. You were nervous enough to see your doctor today and discuss your pregnancy but adding the stress of your situation with Luke was not helping anything.

The three of you sit awkwardly in the waiting room, waiting for one of the nurses to call you back. You know both Luke and Calum could tell that you were nervous, but neither of them wanted to help out apparently. You took a couple deep breaths and sat impatiently waiting for your name to be called. The time was crawling by and you really had to pee. You told Calum you were going to be back in a bit and left to use the bathroom. You didn’t tell Luke because you were still mad at him plus, he could probably figure it out if he used his head.

You were back in less than five minutes and right before you sat back down the nurse called you back. You quickly made your way to the door with Calum and Luke close behind you. You sat on the end of the examination table as you told the nurse your age, when you last had your period, and a bunch of other routine stuff. Once that was all documented, she left you three alone and told you that your doctor would be in soon.

“Well this is super awkward,” Luke said breaking the silence of almost three minutes.

“Wouldn’t be so awkward if you didn’t insist on tagging along,” Calum rebutted, his snarky tone obviously getting under Luke’s skin.

“Would you two quit already? Yeah, it’s awkward but you two aren’t helping how I feel in this situation at all. Now either shut up or quit being mean to one another because whether you like it or not you are both here together to support me and this baby even if a certain SOMEONE did not apologize for the way he lashed out at me last week,” you respond, clearly upset with the both of them.

As soon as you end your little speech and Luke starts to open his mouth the doctor knocks on the door and enters the room. She goes over your chart and asks if you have started experiencing any morning sickness which luckily you have not. She asks a couple other questions before she has you go into the bathroom to get a urine sample. She already thinks you are pregnant, but she wants the lab results to confirm this.

Once you give the lab technician your sample, she runs it through the system. By the time you get back to the examination room the results are in. The doctor announces that your test results confirm your pregnancy and asks you to lay down on the exam table and lift up your shirt for your first ultrasound. You are nervous but Calum sits next to you and squeezes your hand. Luke stands at the other end of the room so he could still see the monitor but also, so he is not in the way of anything.

The gel is cool on your stomach which was to be expected but it still caused a couple goosebumps to form along your arms. Usually an ultrasound isn’t routine for your first visit, but you were expected to be far enough along that you could have one done right away. The doctor slowly moved the wand over the gel on your abdomen and watched the monitor to see what you guys were working with. Finally, after what seems like an hour of searching a little image shows up on the monitor. What looks like nothing more than a dark grey blob will soon be a tiny baby in your arms.

The doctor announces that your baby is that blob on the screen and immediately you feel your eyes leak out a couple of salty tears. You were never one to be overly emotional, but you couldn’t help it. That is your baby on the screen. Yours and Calum’s baby. Calum squeezes your hand a little tighter and Luke smiles as all of your eyes are glued to the screen in front of you. The doctor asks if any of you want pictures from the ultrasound to take home with you even though you can’t see much. The three of you nod your heads almost simultaneously which makes her smile and she grabs them for you and tells you about the prenatal supplements you should start taking along with explaining what you should expect from now until the next time you are in her office.

On your way home from the office, Luke asks if he can ride with you. You are about to say you don’t think that is the best idea when Calum gives you a Luke that basically tells you to hear him out. You sigh but decide to listen to Calum’s advice assuming that it would probably be easier on Calum anyway to have some alone time without Luke for once. You walk to your car with Luke trailing behind you as you tell Calum you will meet him back at your apartment. You open your car door and sit down before Luke sighs and starts his lengthy apology.

[nikatyler]

You might have seen me complain about this “graduation thing” that I had to write. (my English teacher actually called it a thesis, but that sounds too fancy in my opinion lol. I just...can’t see myself writing a thesis...yet. Language is funny.) Well, IT IS DONE. I CAN BREATHE NOW. I have some more things to finish before my graduation exams, and then I have to learn all the topics for the exams but for now, everything is fine. I’ll worry about this later. Speaking of exams and everything, I have one last month of high school left. When did that happen? There are the exams in May, uni entrance exams in June...and then I’m off to the so called adulthood. Help??

Let’s talk about sims for a bit...well, I’d love to but I’m almost never playing anymore. There’s no time. I’ll probably play BPR this weekend, as per usual. I guess I’ll start posting it in like June or July, so that will be almost a year since I started playing it. It’s going to be great, I promise. Well, the beginning already makes me cringe, but the things I’m doing now are fun. Kinda cringey too, but I feel like I can justify that since that’s cringey on purpose haha.

Replies now. There’s a lot of them because I don’t do these regularly anymore oops. It’s probably not everything because my activity feed hides stuff from me. I just know it. Smh tumblr

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Sammy: … Lydia: “Come on.” Sammy: “These…these two guys. They laughed...”

Can't believe I'm about to throw hands with some teenagers I haven't even met lol

Same lol. They won’t even ever show up but I hate them so much

myopiccc replied to your photoset “Lydia: “They should mind their own business! Sammy, listen to me now....”

I'm on your side Lydia!

She has a good valid point but if I could talk about this to her I would probably try to stop her too. She doesn’t think about the consequences haha

create-a-sim replied to your photoset “Sim Request: Michelle Emmons for @alfalfalegacy I do this thing that...”

she's soooo cute!!

Thank youuu! I really like how she turned out too!

melien replied to your post “post nsb”

Anon told you to post nsb so you should immediately go play and post nsb because your blog exists exclusively for their personal pleasure and entertainment! No excuses!!

Wait until they find out I want to post BPR next. Another sims 3 save. SCANDALOUS. HOW DARE I PLAY ANYTHING THAT ISN’T OUR LORD AND SAVIOR THE SIMS 4™. Sorry I read a post comparing ts3 and ts4 a few days ago and I’m still salty.

Anon pls don’t start a riot

melien replied to your photoset “Annabeth: “Uh…I think your face is stuck.” Regan: “Didn’t you know...”

I second this! It's kinda creepy when it happens

It’s too much. If they smiled a little less, I probably wouldn’t mind but this is just creepy. It kinda reminds me of that Momo thing that was everywhere on the internet a few months ago. My sister showed me a picture and uhh...I didn’t need to see that.

melien replied to your photoset “Adam: “Why can’t you be more like your siblings?” Lydia: “Umm, dad,...”

She's a modern day Tyler I guess

Sort of, yeah. Tyler kinda fakes it I’d say, he’s not as dumb as he’s trying to seem. It’s a role he chose to play for reasons. Which...probably makes him dumb in a way but oh well. Lydia...I don’t want to say she’s dumb because she’s not really, but there’s a slight difference between her and Tyler haha. I could talk about this a lot.

melien replied to your post “I`d looove to make ships with other people however I`m not completely...”

It's fine! Showing them in the legacy is more than enough. With people who I have the most ships with, we do discuss them, but it's not like 24/7 headcanon exchange, it just happens naturally whenever either of us has an idea. There's no right way to act when you have a ship with someone, so you're good! It's still much better than one-sided ship when the other person just isn't interested.

I’m the kind of person who would like to have everything clear, possibly broken down to a step-by-step tutorial haha. Even though I know some things don’t work like that. So naturally, stuff like talking to people confuses me a lot. Also, teamwork! I don’t know how to do it. Depending on who I’m working with, I’ll either be the one who does all the decisions or the one who nods and agrees with everything the partner says. Communication is hard, basically.

I think that here, another big problem with me is that I hate spoilers and I don’t want to spoil anything to anyone ever. Even if they probably have the right to know first. But hey, all the current ships I have with other people have been shown, maybe I’ll feel more comfortable doing it now?

melien replied to your photoset “Didn’t I tell you to go inside? “Omg muuuuum leave me alone.”

Caleb: okay

Caleb: *rises from his grave* “Don’t disrespect me, son-in-law.”

melien replied to your photoset “Hey hi hello I know everyone is busy downloading Strangerville right...”

Super late here but Myra and everyone else look great! ��

Thank! I’ve been thinking about updating the entire tree again though, giving everyone new pictures, so who knows how long this will stay whoops.

melien replied to your post “Why do y'all open sim requests when I have no use for more sims. �� I...”

Same :/ I want sims from everyone but I just know I won't use them anywhere in the nearest future and I don't want to put pressure on myself

Looking back, I’m actually glad I requested all these sims for gen 6 because it kept me going. I knew I had to get through the hard too-many-sims-in-the-household part because I wanted to show them in the end. 

I hate when people request sims and then never ever use them anywhere. Don’t get me started on “hey I want to start a new legacy, please give me spouses for all ten generations”, followed a few days/weeks later by “hey guys sorry, I’m not that interested in this legacy, I’ll be starting a new one” - and the cycle starts over again. Why would anyone do that? Just ask for a gen 10 sim when you get there, it’s not that hard to wait.

I mean, here’s what I’m doing right now - I’ve created a peach spouse for my bpr sim months ago, they haven’t even met in the legacy yet, but I’d already love to have the orange sim for the next generation because I’m so excited about this all at the moment. Am I going to ask someone now? Hell no. I didn’t play this legacy for like six months and even though I love it so much lately, there’s a chance I’ll lose interest in it again. I’ll ask for an orange sim when I’ll know I can do gen 3...it’s gen 3 right. Oh well.

melien replied to your photoset “I forgot this interaction existed. I don’t do weddings too often. My...”

Is this a wedding-specific interaction? I feel like I haven't seen it in my game yet but idk for sure

Yes! I think they can only do it with that moodlet they get as soon as they get married.

melien replied to your photoset “Lydia the…wait, I need a really good superhero name. Ah, I’ll think...”

Lydibug

Uhhhh, the other day I thought about how Eielyd (switched i/y because of her name, I know it’s eyelid) would be a really stupid nickname for her but Lydibug actually sounds cool aaaand it’s now canon she loves Miraculous Ladybug.

melien replied to your photoset “Lydia: “I’m gonna make fun of every asshole in this town. Starting...”

Ooooooooo good luck getting out of this one

Whoopsie

Something similar actually happened to me in elementary school, my friend and I were talking about which colour we want our house be when we’re adults and then I said something like: “I don’t know but I definitely don’t want it to be yellow! Yellow houses are ugly.” And she goes: “My house is yellow.” My face turned red and I started shaking because I thought I had offended her sooo badly. I remember I got out of it saying something like: “Your house is okay, I just don’t like the bright yellow ones.” I don’t know what I had against yellow houses, to be fair. But I didn’t like them.

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Sammy: “How was your day, Will?” Will: “Good. Very good. You need to...”

Oh my god Will ����

Don't jump ahead in the plot lol

Since he plays so much with magic, maybe he’s seen the future haha

autistichatkid replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

rose!!! idk exactly when but i believe miracle was a child and tyler had long hair

alfalfalegacy replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

Came in just before Miracle's gen started and have stayed ever since!!

lalunebleue replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I first started following when you were doing the ts3/ts4 crossover story with Zoe. That was a really cool idea.

kyveria replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

right at the beginning of your nsb legacy, and I thought it was the best one! ��

harmoniouspixels replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I found your blog around the time Caleb was pregnant with Miracle and the mommy jokes from Tyler began (I could’ve been following earlier, but I distinctly remember that)

simlovinggirl replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I found you on Gen 5 of your Rose Legacy. Miracle's story still pulls at my heart ♥

autumndiesirae replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I think I got your blog on my recommended feed during Ross' transformation in NSB

whysimstho replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I was looking up nsb stories to read, and I found the breeze legacy which was around when Ross was still a child. Then I noticed your sims 3 posts and was like "oo that looks cool" so I started reading them from the beginning too lol

desira-sims replied to your post “Hi guys, I have a question �� I know some of you have been here...”

I came across a Caleb and Ross post. I then proceeded to binge read your nsb until I had caught up.

This post lowkey backfired. I asked just because I was curious and suddenly there I was, reading the comments and sobbing because this is so cool and basically, I love and appreciate you all so much guys, you have no idea.

I guess it’s one thing knowing you see someone in your activity feed all the time, and the other thing is actually remembering when you’ve started seeing them and how much they’ve seen. It’s insane.

It’s also interesting to see how I feel about many of these things now (Zoey and Miracle’s storylines are the greatest example) and then here you are still saying it was good...makes me wonder if I’m too hard on myself. I’m never satisfied with everything!

kymmaisims replied to your post “Plans for this week and other rambling”

Take your time! We understand ��

It’s going to be a few hard months now...but hopefully I’ll be able to do it!

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Annabeth: “Consider yourself invited, Micah.”

!!!

Here we finally gooooo

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Cassandra: “That was the dumbest romcom I’ve seen in a while.” Sammy:...”

The way Sammy looks at her in this post is really cute :')))

PROTECT

pxelblobs replied to your post “Nope! Not at all. I did not just read all 377 pages of your Rose...”

I did! It took a few days but it inspired me to play a non berry save.

Yay, I’m happy to hear that!

kymmaisims replied to your post “In case you were wondering why there were no timezone reblogs today: I...”

*cough* poses *cough* ������ Congrats on almost reaching a milestone! You deserve it!

Thank you! Three more followers left. That’s insane. I still feel the same way I did when I only had like 100 followers.

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset

No, Miracle don't return to the aliens right now! You still have teens to raise! And a husband.

That would have been kinda cool if it happened, wouldn’t it? You’re not ready for what actually happened. Haha...haha...hahaha...just you wait, it starts today.

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “Calypso Heather for @sinfulwunders’s Melanie BC A long time ago,...”

Oh. My. God is she cool!

Thank you! I knooow, I love her so much *-* I tried doing some things differently this time and it was so worth it.

justkeeponsimming replied to your photoset “Look, she deserves a break. She freaking raised six children.”

She looks so adorable OMG

She does! My opinion on her has changed a lot through the years (I mean, she’s not my most favourite sim anymore, I don’t think her storyline was the best thing I’ve ever done etc), but nothing will change the fact that she’s the cutest sim I have.

harmoniouspixels replied to your post “˜ºï¸ Caleb Vatore”

Re Number 2: Yes, you're right! He's shown being romantic with women and then a guy in the vampire pack's trailer. We stan a canon bisexual icon

Ahh I knew I didn’t make it up! We stan a canon bisexual icon indeed

alfalfalegacy replied to your photoset “Will: “A real fairy!” ??: “Huh?” Will: “I mean…oh my god. I’m sorry....”

Will's a big mood though. Cause I too would see a fairy and then immediately blurt something out like that ��

I wouldn’t blurt it out, probably (I don’t talk irl lmao), but I’d do something equally embarrassing and my reaction would be probably the same. I’d run away and feel bad about it.

tiny-tany-thaanos replied to your photoset “One Year of Breeze NSB Legacy! On this day one year ago, as soon as I...”

Happy birthday, the Breezes! ❤️��❤️

fataleromeo replied to your photoset “One Year of Breeze NSB Legacy! On this day one year ago, as soon as I...”

I love these edits! ����

froggypixel replied to your photoset “One Year of Breeze NSB Legacy! On this day one year ago, as soon as I...”

This is so freakin cool��❤️❤️

justkeeponsimming replied to your photoset “One Year of Breeze NSB Legacy! On this day one year ago, as soon as I...”

ronnie these edits are SO cute! I love love love what you did with the screenshots in the background!

Thank you guys! ♥ ♥ I didn’t know what to do, so I just took some simple couple pictures and then I thought wait a minute...I could put screenshots from the two finished generations in the background!

I kinda wanna do the same thing for Rose Legacy which turns three years old this April, but I hate editing ts3 pictures - mainly because the alpha hair is a bitch to edit, at least for me. I’m pretty good at faking it, but I actually don’t know much about Photoshop :D Once again, thank you guys.

[aparticularbandit]

Current State of Bandit Fic

The last official one of these was in May, and then the last other update of a general updating schedule magnitude was in July, so...it’s been a while, so it’s time for another one of these, I think.

Under the cut because I know these tend to get long and not everyone wants to read all of it and apologies to mobile users because I don’t think the cut works for y’all.  Sorry!

plans for the rest of the year in terms of updates:

I’ve updated my word count this month to 1.5k daily instead of 1k daily and then plan to up it to 2k daily during Nanowrimo - and then if that’s able to hold, I’m hoping to keep that daily 2k up during December (but with the holidays, who knows).

I really like doing those polls before the Monday updates to see what y’all want and then posting that - and I think, with the variations in what I have in backlog, that maybe works better until I have a bunch of backlog for a bunch of different projects (like how I had Carla finished and had Luisa and the Fox finished and so was really just alternating new writing in between ... was it maybe once a month?) - so I think, come November, I’ll probably do that again.  That way I’m updating projects I have stuff written for and don’t feel constrained to projects I don’t have written updates for and might feel constrained trying to write updates.

October is still Kiss Prompts Month - I do have fall prompts, too, but other than one, they’re unfinished and probably won’t get posted until November.

October Monday updates will also continue to be for Luisa and the Wolf because that is your spoopy Halloween holiday fic.  Huzzah.

November is Nanowrimo, but given the writing this month, I should be okay in terms of keeping up the Monday schedule.

I have:

one (1) chapter of Falling

two (2) chapters of Aftershocks

one (1) fall prompt

two (2) chapters of Bitches Get Glitches

potentially three if i split that third chapter up into two chapters, which i’m still seriously considering doing.

Those should cover the four Monday updates in November if I don’t write other stuff for them.

My focus for the rest of the year in terms of finishing something is to finish the rough draft of the first book of the Roisa HP AU.  That’s the book I’m planning to focus on during Nanowrimo, and hopefully I’ll be able to get the rough done so that I can get the first book to y’all sometime next year.

Roisa Secret Santa is a thing!  I’m organizing that and I hope that goes off really well!

I may do Christmas or holiday prompts in December - because I really like having short little prompts to work on when I don’t want to dive into a deeper chapter - something short to write instead of something longer is oddly nice - so we’ll see about that.

I also want to finish one of the Christmas fics I started last year, but it’s not good in terms of word count - like...you’ll understand if I post it - but that’s...a high priority.

Other than that, I don’t know what the Monday updates in December will be, but we can cross that bridge when we get there.

general fic updates (aka - i mostly stop using capital letters for whatever reason):

posted but incomplete fics:

if you lived here, you’d be home now:

no one’s asked but it’s been months since an update and it’s not that i don’t want to update, it’s that it’s been long enough that i feel i should finish a reread of what’s posted before starting the next chapter and i keep dragging my feet on that.

i actually have a good idea of what happens in the next several chapters, so that’s not the issue, it’s just getting myself to finish the reread and then actually doing the writing.

there’s still a lot of chapters left.  sorry?  maybe i’m sorry for not updating more regularly now that ACAL is finished. :/

jane: the real story:

this is on back-burner because, even though i’m really salty, i’ve found that when i hit hey, it’s time to write petra! i run into a wall of okay, but i know people love petra, and i know she has a very specific voice and tone and then i get kind of...overwhelmed and worried that she’ll be ooc.  which is probably why i haven’t written the next chapter yet (michael isn’t really like this, but he might be - and raf isn’t like this at all because raf in j:trs is meant to be a commentary on...raf).  i think it’s that i don’t have a well enough grip of writing petra closer to canon to feel up to par writing her in this situation.  maybe?  idk.

i know this is one of the most ... whatever fics on ao3 when it comes to my fics, so like, i’m aware of that, it’s just...back-burner right now.

heart in motion:

i actually started the second chapter of this a while back.  i should finish that.  if so, you might see it in a monday update poll   we’ll see.

luisa and the child:

aka the sequel to luisa and the fox

i have the first...two?  three? idk chapters written.  i’m still feeling out the plot - i have a good idea of bits and pieces of it, but i’m still waiting on those to come together in one cohesive thing.

similar to the last three chapters of luisa and the fox, i don’t plan on posting these until i’ve got the entire thing roughed out and gone through a second write.  maybe a beta.  not sure on that one yet.

sin rostro:

this is another one of those petra is an important character who shows up in the next chapter and i’m not sure i’ll write her well issues.  holding off on this one.

emilia antonia:

i have a general idea for what happens in the next chapter, as well as a general idea of what happens in the rest of the fic.  this one’s a matter of me sitting down and focusing on it and writing it, and i’ve been in a bandit writes lint fic headspace recently, which doesn’t bother me.

falling:

i feel like i should go back and resee some of the episodes of hannibal with margot in s2 and s3 and then review a bit of muskrat farm in s3 (as well as some of alana in s3) because that’s where lu is in chapter three.  because i haven’t, i’ve been holding off on writing this one, too, even though i...have a general idea of things that happen throughout the fic. but no real ending.

also maybe have a crack fic planned that would technically be a sequel to this one but would really be a crack fic.  maybe.  we’ll see.

aftershocks:

have two new chapters for y’all written.

have a general idea of what happens in the next chapter.

have a general idea of things that happen in later chapters but not sure where those chapters are in terms of how immediate they are, if that makes sense.

the time of your life:

bitches get glitches is completely done in terms of second write, so each chapter would probably just need a precursory read-through in terms of grammar/spelling/etc. and other minor edits.

with the exception of what would be the third chapter if i split the current third chapter into two chapters - the roisa scene probably warrants a little more than just a precursory read-through before posting.

i’ve started the next fic, which is rafael’s fic.  the next one would be petra’s.

basically, each of the first however many fics (four) focuses on one character and their encounters with their soulmate timer.

one screwed up family focused on rose, even though it also included luisa’s past with her timer.

bitches get glitches focuses on jane, even though it also includes carry-over updates on what’s been going on with luisa and rose since the first fic.

the third fic focuses on rafael.

the fourth fic focuses on petra.

at this point, i have a fairly good idea of when each of these five characters’ timers went off and when they might go off in future fics (i’d be more specific here, but spoilers!).

after those four, i would want to write a fifth fic that wraps things up - but this is kind of dependent on where things get left off in petra’s fic.

rafael’s encounters don’t finish in his fic, which leaves it on kind of a cliff-hanger, and i don’t think his final encounter happens in petra’s fic, so...fifth fic.

i’m actually hoping that writing petra in this fic will give me the confidence to write petra in the other fics she shows up.  so.  there’s that.

unposted fics:

where the lightning splits the sea:

aka roisa hp au

as stated before, the first book is my planned main project for nanowrimo and i hope to have the rough draft finished by the end of the year (we’ll see if that actually happens or not).

i have an entire series outline consisting of main things i want to happen in each book, along with their titles, and things that have to happen in specific books to set up for the proper pay off in later books.

the first book is entirely outlined - chapter by chapter.

i’ve started chapter-by-chapter outlines for books two and three.

the entire compiled outline alone is seventeen pages long.

i love this project a lot, and i’m super excited to share it with y’all, it’s just long.

mexican stud:

aka rosalint fic

i have a full working outline!  chapter by chapter!  huzzah!

this one still comes in bits and pieces and scenes that aren’t always interconnected.  i know what happens, but then pick and choose at scenes to write when i want to write it.

this fic will likely end up being fairly explicit - or, compared with other stuff i’ve written, more explicit - simply due to the themes and the content.  that may be part of why i take so long to write it - explicit scenes have a tendency to make me uncomfortable when i’m reading them and i don’t feel fully comfortable posting explicit scenes. but....

this would considered part of the epic superhero crossover (see below), even though the events are, to some extent, considered canon to aftershocks (with some exceptions which can be explained...later).

everything’s coming up rose’s:

stalled.

still excited, still want to write it, but focusing on other things atm.

various other soulmate aus:

one-shot (tentatively titled chorus: romance says goodnight):

still kicking around in my head.

still want to write it.

don’t think y’all will like it because it’s in raf’s point of view.

and other reasons.

but still want to write it.

dreamers often lie:

still at the point where i’ve brainstormed enough that i should start writing it because then i’ll get a more concrete idea of the world and of the events in the world but--

i’m currently focused on the soulmate timer au in terms of soulmate fics right now.  oops.

epic superhero crossover:

aka jtv/tick/timeless/supergirl/x-files/agent carter crossover.

hey, look, that’s a lot of things, so expect this to be massive, too.

the more i brainstorm this one, the bigger it gets, and at this point, i think it’ll probably be a bunch of interconnected fics in a series - like the time of your life - the soulmate timer au - instead of one big massive fic. it’s just easier to conceive of that way.

mexican stud is a fic on its own but goes within this crossover.

i want to write a fic about how emma and whitney get together (because they are together before rose gets them and all three of them are together in mexican stud - together as in a group, not as in together, even though emma and whitney definitely are together).

i want to write a fic about how dottie became the way she is when we meet her in the main fic (this would likely involve carterwood and dottie/whitney aspects - either directly or implied - and then it would likely come up in the main fic, there’s a bit from the part i just wrote that i want to be directly an exact quote from this).

i want to write a fic with rhea raising dottie (and potentially use that as backstory on how rhea and lena are...coworkers/acquaintances/partners/surrogate found family/etc. which could lead to complications re: lena and dottie but...idk).

even if lena isn’t a huge part of the rhea/dottie family fluff, i want to write something that deals with rhea in luthor-corp and l-corp and what she was doing after she got to earth - because that one’s different than canon (because i’m using ben’s rhea in a pod au v1 for this).

then there’s the main fic itself - which is where you get a lot of the crossover elements - particularly the x-files elements, which don’t really come up directly in the other fics but are definitely there in some of them (and by some of them, i mean the dottie backstory fic, they would be in the dottie backstory fic).  this would also be where the supergirl cast actually comes in (other than rhea and lena and the luthors and maybe astra?  maybe astra’s alive in this?  since rhea was around maybe she took astra?  or lillian?  idk haven’t decided yet).

so - like - this one is also a huge massive undertaking but in a different way than the roisa hp au is.  the interconnected fics for this aren’t necessarily as linear as the ones for the roisa hp au, and i want the main fic to be enjoyable on its own even if you haven’t read the other fics - the other fics might also stand on their own ish, but like...the random kingdom hearts games - to get the full story, you maybe want to play the main games.  ish.

also debating using my trans!mulder here because...like, i love him and i know he got me into trouble but...his story works so well here in context and i would love to use him here.  so.  it’s.  complicated.  :/

but - yeah - there’s your update on the state of things.  maybe look out for another update at the beginning of january, because i might be changing up some of how i’ve been writing and goals and things - but i think that’s it for now.

[neverwatchedonepiece]

511-513: "Unexpected Relanding! Luffy, to Marineford!", "With Hopes It Will Reach My Friends! Big News Spreading Fast!" and "Pirates Get On the Move! Astounding New World!"

Lafitte showing off his soft skills.

Now these three episodes were worth every minute! This is, hand on heart, my favourite part of any arc epilogue: when the seeds of new plots are sown and you get to see what everyone else is up to.

And there was a lot of that in 511-513.

I’m still messing with the format. I’ll stick with the three days a week posts but watching six episodes at a time was too much. The post ended up way too long and I couldn’t get into much speculation (which is the most fun part). Three at a time might be a better balance. :)

Luffy’s Message

This was the Main Event for me. It was why I was so keen to watch the next lot of episodes. That cliffhanger drawn out over so many episodes! What could have caused the Strawhats to react so spectacularly? What the hell was Rayleigh up to? Why all the secrecy?

And most of all...

Why the hell would Luffy go back to Marineford?

The answer? He wanted to send a message. And Rayleigh had crafted his plan so skillfully that this message would be different depending on which side a character was on.

The build up was great. 511 opened with a Marine debriefing meeting. Marines were getting the hairdryer treatment because Monkey D. Luffy, the notorious rookie pirate, had not only escaped their grasp but had the audacity to return to the scene of the crime with the Traitor Jimbei and The Dark King Rayleigh.

This was not good PR. And we all know the Marines are all about PR.

What happened was this: a lone Marine ship sailed right into the bay without clearance and fired a blank. Then three figures were spotted on board: Luffy, Rayleigh and Jimbei. Of course, they were fired on. The ship caught fire and sunk, but Luffy leapt ashore with Rayleigh and Jimbei and set about... doing some really weird stuff.

He rung the Ox Lloyd’s Bell (a Marine tradition, apparently. It’s rung at New Year: eight times to salute the passing year and another eight to welcome the new). Okay, I thought. I have no idea what this means. Let’s see where this goes.

It became a bit clearer when Luffy walked through the dumbstruck crowd, laid flowers into the chasm and removed his hat in a gesture of respect. Okay, I thought, this is funeral stuff. He’s returning to Marineford to pay his respects to Ace. This was to give Luffy closure so he could continue to live his life without being crippled by guilt and depression.

Except it was bigger than that, but I didn’t realise it until Luffy, Rayleigh and Jimbei exited via getaway whale sharks and the action returned to the debriefing meeting. The Marine in charge was Oda’s mouthpiece. Ringing the Ox Lloyd’s bell was a challenge. Luffy rang out the old Pirate Era and rang in the new one. That Rayleigh (symbol of the Old Era) was at his side was Significant. The Marines believe that Rayleigh has backed Luffy to be Roger’s successor. (This might be true. It was Rayleigh’s plan, after all. He knows all about pirate symbolism and how to make a statement. He was on Roger’s crew.)

Annoyingly, I didn’t realise the Return to Marineford would also be like the bat signal to the Strawhats until Vivi picked up the newspaper and I saw that photo of Luffy (I’m still salty she didn’t join the crew).

And I noticed something interesting. Those tattoos Vivi mentioned. 3D2Y. I have seen that combination of numbers and letters before on the CR arc list. Does this mean Luffy will only reunite with the Strawhats in 3D2Y (whatever that is)? According to the arc list, I have Fishman Island to go first.

I also have no idea what 3D2Y could mean. Maybe it’s a calendar thing? 3D is crossed out (the old pirate era) and 2Y is the new pirate era? Maybe it’s a new model of Star Wars droid. I have no clue.

But I can’t wait to find out! :D

The Strawhats

Of course, the Strawhats picked up on it right away. (Vivi did too, which is why you should have joined the crew, Vivi, why do you have to be such a good and dutiful noble?)

Zoro’s and Chopper’s reactions to the Marineford Return were most in-depth, so I’ll talk about them here just now. I’m assuming from the 514 preview that we’ll get Sanji, Nami, Usopp, Robin, Franky and Brook later.

They didn’t give us much of Zoro here. It was a short scene but his reaction was the most interesting. While the other Strawhats said: “Awesome, Luffy. Got the message!” Zoro was actually suspicious.

“Luffy doesn’t do sneaky, clever stuff like that!” he said to Perona. “This must be Rayleigh’s plan.”

Clearly, Zoro knows Luffy so well at this point that he can tell Luffy’s style of planning. I liked that.

And Chopper...

I still have that major soft spot for Chopper. I still cannot watch the flashbacks of his past without tearing up. Every time Chopper cries, I kind of want to take him aside and say, “Shhh, Chopper. I can’t handle your little reindeer tears.”

It was when Chopper returned to Birdie Kingdom that the penny dropped. The Strawhats wouldn’t reunite yet. They all have to go through training. Now everything from the last few episodes made sense. Maybe the Strawhats I thought would get away without training will have to do it after all.

And Chopper definitely got a good deal here. That library! I was as shocked as Chopper (but at least I didn’t say it out loud, haha, that was funny).

Chopper’s loyalty to Luffy and the Strawhats has upped a few levels post-Sabaody. He said something really interesting (and kind of worrying). Remembering his past, when he was reviled as a monster - outcast from human and reindeer society - he never wanted to go through something like Sabaody again and is now willing to “become a real monster for Luffy.”

Wow... Chopper’s about to get an upgrade. I mean, he’s always had so much potential. Monster Point, anyone? Those Rumble Balls? And he’s a great medic? Hopefully, Oda has good things planned for Chopper.

And speaking of plans... not all is well in the World Government hierarchy! I wouldn’t like to say they deserve it, but... they deserve it.

The Gorosei?

I think that’s who these guys are. I counted five in the shot and they are all old guys in suits, so I’ll go with it for now. There was no confirmation in the episode. Neither were names given, so I’ve made some up. I feel like I need to distinguish them because they all seem to have a different take on the post-Marineford situation.

Ringlets was worried about Luffy. He is a controversial figure. Of course, Luffy is Garp’s grandson, so that is a given.

Saruman was concerned about smoke rising from Mount Doom... Nah, kidding. He’s worried how Luffy knows Rayleigh. He thinks Rayleigh won’t return to centre stage but implies that maybe Rayleigh will support Luffy from the shadows.

Handlebar was salty about Jimbei. Was annoyed he finally turned against them as he was a symbol of intertribal peace. (The ‘finally’ implies they always suspected Jimbei would snap one day.)

Baldy was concerned about the imbalance of power in pirate society. There is a vacant Yonkou seat and THREE to fill in the shichibukai. How to fill those vacancies? Is there anyone qualified left? Glasses was also annoyed that the D. names were receiving so much PR lately and making the WG look bad.

Blonde has his eye on the New World. The power structure imbalance there now Whitebeard is gone is troublesome. They will have to choose the strongest to be Shichibukai. He also gave us an update on Blackbeard, which was nice. Wasn’t expecting to hear from Teach for ages!

Apparently, Teach has already made waves in the New World. He has an advantage over others who want that Yonkou seat because he knows everything there is to know about Whitebeard’s territory.  No one has ever eaten two Devil Fruits in history except for him. Only another Yonkou or Marco and the remaining Whitebeards could take him out. Is that a statement on Blackbeard’s new power level? Is he training too, so he’ll be an effective adversary for Luffy by the time they inevitably clash again the New World?

I have my fingers crossed for it.

And there’s something else the Gorosei should be worried about...

Human Resources Will Be Snowed Under Right Now

I forgot who Kong-san is, but I bet he has his work cut out for him right now.

There are a lot of changes afoot at WG and Marine HQ. The biggest shocker is that SENGOKU HAS RESIGNED!

I am so happy about this. Now, all he has to do is join the Revolutionary Army and I’m all set.

Garp continues to exasperate. He has “virtually resigned” but lacks whatever he needs to be truly brave and take that final step. He has kept the Vice Admiral title and is now tutoring younger Marines. I suppose it’s good he’s still around to keep whippersnappers like Akainu in check, especially now Sengoku did not recommend Akainu to succeed him.

Aokiji, the mystery wrapped in an enigma, will be Fleet-Admiral.

I... it’s weird. I can’t see it yet, but it’s definitely a better choice than Akainu. Maybe he would’ve been better with Kizaru. Oh well, it’s Sengoku’s choice. I trust him. He’s a wise man. “Old soldiers shouldn’t cling to power,” he said. “Justice is based on values and those change every generation.”

He ain’t wrong.

And I’m guessing now Garp is training young Marines that Coby, WHO HAS AWAKENED HAKI, will be first on the list. Here’s another one who will go through training to become a worthy opponent of Luffy.

Smoker also went to see Aokiji and requested a transfer to G5 branch. Aokiji had doubts. “That’s not a place you go voluntarily.” Apparently, G5 means Grand Line, 5th Branch. It’s in the New World. Smoker wants a New World placement.

I cannot handle this much awesome.

To Top It All Off, The Pink One Is Also Causing Trouble

How can he sit like that? Surely that is not in any way comfortable?

Remember when he ambushed Moria at Marineford? Turns out he didn’t quite get the job done (phew!) I should stick to my No Corpse, No Death rule more often.

In the words of Doflamingo.... “Poof!”

Moria disappeared just before Doflamingo landed the final blow. He insisted Moria was dying, so even if he did get away, he wouldn’t go far. Unless he came back as a zombie. (You joke, Doflamingo, but I would not put that past Moria for one reason: Hogback!)

The WG official accused him of sloppy work. Then Doflamingo lost his cool. I’ve never seen him act like that before, so it was interesting. “Who do you think you’re talking to? When did you become my boss? When I lose interest in doing business with you guys, I’ll quit being a Shichibukai at any time.”

I guess this really highlights the tenuous relationship the Marines have with these guys. Plus, Doflamingo seems like he’s Mr Chaotic Evil (or at least Mr Neutral Evil) incarnate, so maybe not the best guy to rely on?

Especially when the New World has descended into utter chaos.

So Who’s All Enjoying The New World?

Everyone who is anyone will head there eventually. Crocodile and Daz Bones will have another crack at it. Law has plans but is content to wait for his time (smart). The Strawhats, obviously, are a Work in Progress.

Buggy has reunited with his old crew (I forgot about Richie the Lion. How dare I?) and also has a massive bunch of Impel Down followers. Maybe he’ll have a crack at it too, now he has Alvida and Galdino to be the strategists? Plus, he just got that letter from the WG. Maybe he’ll end up on the run.

The rest of the Rookies have ventured out.

As for the Supernovas (sans Law and Luffy) I have predictions.

Who Will Make It:

The most obvious candidate is Kidd. He’s made for the cruelty of the New World, has already crushed another crew and has declared himself an enemy of Luffy. Sweet. Battle points.

Hawkins is another one who has crushed a crew. Again, battle points.

Apoo isn’t dumb. He’ll run if he has to. Smart points.

The Jury’s Out:

Urouge has stumbled across The Thunder Plains (from Final Fantasy X) and met some weird old ladies who look like they’ve just stepped out of Macbeth.

Who’s Probably Not Okay:

Gang Bege’s ship is in fragments. X-Drake has just clashed with Kaido’s crew. I don’t see them lasting much longer.

And Jewelry Bonney...

When Your Fave Is Problematic

Hard pass, Teach. A very hard pass.

I loved how the intro caption to this scene was: “Some Burning Island”. Then I saw the Blackbeards and thought, “Praise Oda! My villainous faves have returned in style!”

I thought the only news I would get on them was from the Gorosei. This was a nice bonus.

Of course, they were bickering. The Blackbeards always bicker and snipe at each other. There was a definite tone change here, though, as though Oda wants to step their villainy up a gear.

Take their argument over the ship they sailed in on. Teach said, “We should have stolen a Marine ship. The Raft wasn’t great.” Shiryu’s retort was tolerated: “You guys don’t prepare for anything.” But Avalo Pizarro’s (I finally know his name!) joke, “Want me to be captain, Teach?” earned him this response from Lafitte: “Shut up or I’ll kill you. We are Blackbeard Pirates.”

Teach is gaining more authority and loyalty from his crew. The ones who have always been with him are fiercely loyal and the newer ones have yet to learn the ropes. Lafitte (is he the first mate?) is also flexing. Do I sense tension between the established and newer members of the crew? Maybe, but they seem to get along well enough.

Among the new ones, I already have the ones I like (Shiryu and Catalina) vs the ones I’m not keen on (Avalo, San Juan and Vasco. Their personalities haven’t really emerged yet, so there’s time).

While the island burned, the Blackbeards stuck around necking Jacky D (haha!) because they were waiting for the Marines.

Why? Were they about to do another deal?

Yeah... but not one I was expecting.

They had crushed Bonney’s crew, chained her up and were about to trade her in for a ship.

That was shocking. I hadn’t expected Bonney to catch up to Teach so quickly and be defeated, but the outcome wasn’t surprising. Of course Teach would do that. He’d done it to Ace before and it worked. Sasuga Teach, I guess. What he did next stepped up his villainy a few notches.

He turned on lech mode, which I didn’t know was in his repertoire.

“I can’t believe they gave you a hundred million bounty! The New World is the sea for the chosen strong ones. You can all the way from South Blue. But you’ll go no further. You’re too weak to join my crew, but you can come with me, if you become my girl.”

Her response was excellent. “SCREW YOU, YOU BEARDED PIG!”

Honestly, Teach. You deserved that. And you were shocked at the rejection? You were going to get the Hard Pass. Apart from being a traitorous, murdering scumbag, you’re also a rubbish flirt. I mean, expecting her to go out with you after you beat up her crew, called her weak and laid her out as bait for the Marines? Not a great sell, Teach. Work on your people skills, like Lafitte.

Their plan went awry when Van Augr spotted Akainu on the approaching ship. Obviously, he would not do any deal (and I bet he’s steaming mad Aokiji will be Fleet Admiral before him). So they scarpered.

I’m worried for Bonney, though. Akainu picking her up? That’s the worst luck... :(

TEAM SELFIE AFTER A HARD DAY’S PILLAGING! #blackbeards #nofilter #okayonefilter

[thisgirlsays22]

Chapters: 13/? Fandom: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Levi/Eren Yeager, Minor or Background Relationship(s) Characters: Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Eren Yeager Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, canonverse, In Universe AU, Canon Era, Reincarnation, Surfer Eren, Pining, Manga Spoilers, Angst, Slow Burn Summary:

Between Titan and human, unconscious and conscious, Eren finds he can access a future world.

Thank you to my betas @attraversiamo19 & @erensjaegerbombs and to my readers/cheerleaders @dreamxxdream @ageha-sakura. 

You can also read below the cut: 

Eren sat down next to Levi, shoulder to shoulder on the couch, brimming with excitement.

“What is it?” Levi asked, setting aside his work.  

“There’s someone on this forum who says that they also remember the ‘Lost Titan Years’.”

Levi raised an eyebrow. “And you believe this random person?”

“I don’t know. Maybe!” Eren nudged Levi. “You and Mikasa had the nightmares. Hanji freaked when she started learning about the Titans. It’s possible there are more people like us out there.”

“But they could also just be full of shit,” he pointed out, nudging Eren back.  

“Well, yeah, I guess. They could have gotten most of this information from the right history books, but still. It’s a lead. At least now I had more to search for than ‘Titans’.”  

“True.”

“The last message they posted was from about a year ago, but hopefully they’ll still see my response.”

He was glad Eren seemed more relaxed, happy even, but this was how it often went. Eren would get caught up in something temporarily exciting and then grow despondent again when the high wore off. It was why for months Levi kept thinking, if I could just help you figure out what you want to do... why he’d seized on the idea of Eren going back to school when he’d expressed an, albeit brief, interest. It had only seemed to frustrate Eren more in the end, though, so Levi had been left unsure how to help him.

Levi had the same inclination to let their earlier conversation go--which he knew he had to stop doing from many discussions with his therapist. Whatever the other Levi and Eren had stirred up, they needed to address it at some point. He just didn’t quite know what he wanted to say.

“How did things go with Farlan?” Eren asked. Levi was actually a little surprised he’d remembered to check in given how focussed he was on writing his next forum post.

“They were fine. He didn’t seem convinced things were alright, but I wasn’t about to tell him what's going on.” What a fucking awkward conversation that would be. By the way, you’re dead in that other world. Good to see you alive, man.

“Oh. Are you mad I told Armin?” Eren’s mouth tugged down into a worried frown.

Levi shook his head and put his arm around Eren. “No. That was your call to make, and I’m glad you have someone else to talk to. Why did you tell him, though?”

“It’s going to sound strange.”

“Try me,” Levi said.

“When I saw Armin the other Eren’s memories it reminded me of how things used to be between us. I remembered how supportive he can be.” Eren sighed. “It was impulsive, but I just felt like maybe it could bring us closer together again. And maybe I can put that big brain of his to good use.”

“That doesn’t sound strange at all.”

Eren gave him a small smile, then said, “I’m glad you talked to Mikasa yesterday.”

“Me too.”

“I wish,” Eren started haltingly. “I wish that you’d had each other growing up.”

“Then we wouldn’t have had you,” Levi pointed out.

“I wish that you’d had each other growing up...and still somehow had me too.”

Levi gave a short laugh. “Yes, well. That very specific wish is sweet but pointless. We would have just been two kids with awful nightmares.”

“When you put it that way, I guess it wouldn’t have made much of a difference.” Eren didn’t look reassured, though.

“Any idea how long we’ve got until we’re body-snatched again?” Levi asked dryly, changing the subject.

“No idea,” Eren replied.  

“We’re both just sitting ducks then.” Levi wondered how they’d been so lucky that the sudden appearance of the other Eren and Levi had never caused them any harm. He certainly hoped it would carry on that way.

Eren nodded. “I’m sure they’ll be back soon. We’ll just be...careful in the meantime.”

“That’s all well and good,” Levi said. “But when does this end?”

“I don’t know, but there has to be some reason they’re coming here. Something we can do that ends this.”

Levi sighed. “We keep looking then.”

“We keep looking,” Eren agreed.

They fell into a rhythm over the next few days. Eren mostly wanting to discuss leads, the latest messages he’d sent to his mysterious new contact, wondering if there was a way they could meet. If he wasn’t updating Levi, it was Mikasa, Armin or Hanji, and eventually Jean--“He’s my husband, ” Mikasa had finally snapped. “I told him everything weeks ago, we’ve just been waiting for you two dopes to give me the all clear.”

Things between Eren and Levi felt good most of the time. They hadn’t exactly left the conversation on a bad note, but there was something unfinished hanging over them, and the fact that Levi wasn’t certain what it was left him off-kilter.

Seeing Eren so intent on helping their counterparts kept Levi from trying to distract him. It had been a long time since he’d seen Eren so enthusiastic, focussed. He could hang back for a little longer, give them both time to separate these two other lives that had invaded their headspace.

At least Eren wanted Levi caught up in his plans too. It pleased him every time Eren gave him another instruction for what to do if the other Eren showed up without Levi. Every time they thought of new things to show their counterparts. Every time they shared an overlapping memory from the other world.

Eren heard back from the person who claimed they remembered the Titans, their previous life. After writing back and forth to one another, Eren agreed to a video chat.

“They’re travelling right now,” Eren said over their morning cups of coffee and tea. “They’ll contact me when they’re back.”

“Shit,” Levi said. “You want me on the call too?”

“Yeah, definitely. They said that was fine. I’m thinking we get the others over too, but just have them off-screen.”

“Why the fuck not? Use the family group chat while you’re at it.”

“I know you’re being sarcastic, but I feel an obligation to Jean to do that. He’s pissed at me.”

Levi leaned back in his chair, taking a thoughtful sip of tea. “Hm. Tell him that I fixed his bad sink repairs. He can be mad at me instead.”

“Can I? I think that’ll work. Jean can only stay angry at one person at a time.”

Levi waved a hand and said magnanimously, “Sure.”

“I’m going to put another pot on before work. You want more tea? We have to finish working on our notes.”

They had different plans for if the other Eren, Levi or both came at once. For instance, if both came, Armin had suggested they leave post-it notes around the house with instructions for how to contact someone.

In the meantime, all they could do was wait.

     It was two weeks until the other Eren returned. He seemed broody, his presence pulling the plug on the near-manic enthusiasm of Levi's own Eren.  

“No other Levi this time?” he asked.

Eren’s face clouded. “No.”

Levi could guess the source of the misery, and a pang of guilt shot through him. Could he be blamed for the transgressions of another life? Apparently he could from the way Eren was eying him warily.

“We’ve been keeping notes for you,” Levi offered. “To see if any names or things stand out.” He went to retrieve the notebook from their bedroom. “Unless my Eren’s in there right now and can show you himself.”

“No, I don’t feel him like last time. Maybe because we’re not drunk?”

“Probably.”

Eren looked miserable, and no matter which Eren was in his body, Levi couldn’t bear to see it. Especially knowing he--in any form--was likely the cause of it.

“Would you like to go somewhere?” he asked, recalling the awe the other Levi had experienced at seeing where they lived. “We can bring the notes.”

“Sure, I guess. Where?” At least there was a flicker of interest even though his eyes were still downcast.

Levi ran through a mental list of all the places he could take Eren, and he remembered how intrigued he’d been by the photograph of the ocean, how his own Eren could be soothed by its presence.

“To the beach.”

Eren looked at him blankly. Levi still hadn’t gotten used to explaining what every little thing was. “The ocean is there,” he clarified.

Eren’s eyes widened. “Really?”

Ah, now I’ve got your interest, Levi thought. “It’s not too far away, but I’m going to have to explain what a car is.”

“Uh, okay.” Eren looked nervous but followed Levi outside where he listened with his usual intensity as Levi spoke.  

He showed Eren how to buckle his seatbelt, and then they were on their way. Levi was careful not to drive too fast, lest Eren get carsick. If the body you were borrowing was used to riding in cars, but the soul inside wasn’t, did you still get carsick? Levi didn’t particularly want to roll the dice with that one.  

He explained what the radio was, and he even played some of the songs that his own Eren liked, an experiment of sorts. And yes, shitty taste in music seemed to translate over lifetimes. “This is weird, but kind of nice,” he said of some early 90s dance music. Levi winced.

As they neared their destination, the salty ocean air drifted through the cracked car windows, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Eren’s brows knit together.

“What’s that smell?”

“The ocean.”

Eren pressed his hands to the glass, craning his neck. “Where?”

“Just over the bend,” Levi told him, and sure enough, the ocean appeared before them, waves breaking in foamy ruffles against the shore. The sea was calm and languid tonight.

Levi pulled the car over at the lookout point. Eren had once driven them here late at night, climbed into Levi’s lap and made out with him until some drunk teenagers showed up, tapping on the car window and making kissing faces at them.

The last of the light clung to the sky, the tide just coming in and covering the sand in blankets of waves. Eren got out of the car and walked over to the ledge. His hands clutched the metal rail as he looked down at the sea in quiet awe. 

“I wasn’t ready to come back to your world,” he said, voice thick with emotion. “But I knew I had to. So one day back home we could see something like this.” Eren turned to face Levi, tears on his cheeks. 

Levi ushered him over to the car where he’d left the trunk open. He’d owned his ugly, boxy car for over a decade, and he and his Eren had sat at the edge of the trunk under the stars countless times over the years.

“Take a seat,” Levi said, patting the space next to him.

Cautiously, Eren did as he was told. Levi noticed that he even wiped his tears the same way as his Eren, with the back of his hand. Angry, frustrated, defiant.

“Why didn’t you want to come back here?” Levi asked.

Without hesitating, Eren replied, “I wasn’t ready to see you again.” The ocean breeze blew his hair softly into his eyes, and Levi stopped himself from reaching over to brush it away.  

“So you talked to him then?”

Eren gave a short, miserable nod.

“I saw what happened between you,” Levi said. “After you’d been rescued from that...cave.” That strange memory kept coming into his head--Eren shirtless, in chains. The violence of it all gave him chills. It came to him now in nightmares too.

“He must have thought I was so pathetic that night,” Eren said bitterly. He spoke towards the sea, refusing to look at Levi.   

Eren was wrong. The other Levi had sensed a kindred spirit in Eren, someone he could whisper secrets to in the quiet of the night.  

“No. He understood.”

“Maybe.” Eren shook his head. “I don’t know. I’ve spent so much time trying not to think about that night. I couldn’t figure out why he’d let me stay. Pity maybe.”

“I can tell you with certainty that whatever kindness he showed you was never out of pity.”

Eren scowled. “How could you possibly know that? It’s different between you and your Eren. He shared a similar memory with me, but the way it turned out...It’s not the same.”

“In some ways you’re right. But I think we have more in common than we realised.” The saltwater breeze blew back towards them again, and Levi breathed it in deeply. “So what happened when Levi returned?”

“He told me that nothing could happen between us.” Eren’s scowl deepened. “But then he hugged me, and it reminded me of what Eren said. That he wouldn’t just do that for anyone and I--I kissed him.”

Levi’s eyes widened. The kid had balls to kiss his superior officer.

Eren continued, “For a second, I thought he was going to let me. It seemed almost like he was going to kiss me back. But he really doesn’t want me...” Eren trailed off with a defeated sigh and gazed out at the sea again.

“I think he spends a lot of time trying not to think about you,” Levi said slowly, and Eren’s head jerked towards him. “I mean, you can understand his position, can’t you?” Those two probably shouldn’t be together. No matter the pull between them.

“Yes. I just wish things were different.”

“Maybe they will be someday. You don’t have to give up forever.”

“What do I do next then?” Eren asked. A challenge in his voice.

“Don’t leave him,” Levi answered. “If what you have is just a short-lived crush or lust, it isn’t worth fighting for anyway.”

Eren’s eyes narrowed, shoulders tense and defensive. “What do you mean?”

“It might not seem fair, but if you run away, he’ll think he made the right choice, that he did you a favor.”

That year without Eren, after he’d turned him down, he’d thought Eren must have been happy. Imagined him off at school making new friends, going to parties, maybe even falling in love. Never considered that Eren’s longing, lonely ache might have matched his own.

And Levi had most certainly felt an identical ache in the other Levi’s heart. He had felt such depths of sorrow and pain, beyond anything in his own comprehension, and even just the sight of Eren in this world had eased it.

“Be a friend to him,” Levi suggested. “The choice is yours of course, but that’s what I recommend. Even if it’s going to hurt sometimes until it gets easier.”

A seagull squawked overhead, a lonely call in the night, briefly crowding out the soothing sound of the waves. Eren stood and walked over to the edge of the lookout point, eyes fixed on the blackening ocean below.  

“Is that how it was for you two?” Eren asked.

The answer was complicated. Eren had put so much distance between them, Levi had thought for sure he’d imagined their friendship. That he’d imagined that they were family.

“Yes and no.” Levi tilted his head back to look up at the last pink gasps of sunlight. “I don’t know what Eren’s shown you about his mother.”

“Not much,” Eren said. “Mostly happy memories. But I know she died.”

Levi nodded. He stretched his legs out, toeing at a pebble beneath his feet.

“I met Eren, his mother and Mikasa when he was about sixteen.”

At Eren’s puzzled look Levi added, “Mikasa and I weren’t raised together. I didn’t even know I had a sister until Eren found me and introduced us. For so long, I wished I had a family and then suddenly Eren showed up and changed my life.” Suddenly, Levi had felt he belonged somewhere.

“Mikasa is your sister?” Eren repeated, eyes going wide.

Surprised, Levi said. “Oh, yes. We have the same father. It’s not the same for your Levi?”

Eren shook his head.

“Huh. Interesting.” He filed that information away for later. “Anyway, as I got to know Mikasa, I got to know Carla and Eren too. He wasn’t very subtle about having a crush on me.” Levi rolled his eyes fondly.

Face red, Eren stared intently out at the glittering sea as he listened.  

Levi crossed his arms. “One day he kissed me, told me how he felt. I told him no. He was about to start a new phase of his life, and I didn’t want him to miss out on things because he was worrying about me.”  

“I don’t understand what you mean by ‘new phase’.” Eren tilted his head in question.

“It’s common here for people to go away to school for their studies. Usually when they’re about eighteen. You meet a lot of new people, study, work, build a kind of life for yourself there,” Levi explained. “I’m a decade older than Eren, and I’d already lived that part of my life. It wasn’t something I could share with him.”

Eren’s expression turned dubious. “No offense, but that doesn’t seem like a very good reason.”  

Levi shrugged. Of course you’d think that at Eren’s age. “Maybe.”

“Did you change your mind in the end?”  

“Not exactly. His mother got sick and he moved back home. I moved a little closer too, so I could help.” He’d have done anything for any one of them. Carla, Mikasa, Eren. His family.

Sadness washed over Eren’s face. “He showed me some of that. Her dying. It still hurts.”

Levi knew then that Eren was speaking for himself too. Carla’s death in that other life had been violent, horrifying. There was a small comfort knowing in this life she’d been granted peace. He wanted to reach for Eren, both Erens, and hold him.

“I know,” Levi said softly.

“So how did you and Eren...?”

“There was no big conversation about it. You stayed and I stayed, and we just were.” There’d been no choice to make that time.

At first he’d been disappointed that Eren had never gone back to school, but he’d respected the decision and selfishly revelled in the fact that Eren had stayed, that he’d moved into Levi’s home not too long after. More and more of his things appearing in Levi’s spaces, tucked in and around as though there’d been a place for them all along.

A contemplative silence stretched between them. Levi wondered if his Eren was listening, what he was thinking.

“So you think he’d want to be my--” Eren paused, as though trying to remember a long-forgotten word, “friend?” He gave Levi an odd, incredulous look.

“Yes.” There wasn’t a doubt in his mind about that.

“Okay,” Eren said. He stood back again and walked towards the railing to stare out down at the sea. Levi heard him quietly murmur, to himself again, “Okay.”

     Levi texted Armin and Mikasa, and they met them back at the house a little while later, Jean too.

“I’m going to pretend you meant to message the family group chat,” Jean said darkly when he and Mikasa arrived.

Levi sighed, but at Mikasa’s glare said, “Sorry.”

Jean waved a hand. “It’s fine. I just want to meet this bizzare-o, Eren.”

“Yes,” Mikasa said stepping inside, “Where is he?”

Levi took them through to the living room, and he and Jean watched as Eren and Mikasa met.  

“Hi,” she said, moving towards Eren. She lifted her arms, unsure.

A smile spread across his face and he stepped towards her too. “Hi,” he said, and then they embraced. “I saw you here that one time. Before I understood what was going on.”

“I remember,” Mikasa said. She sounded like she was holding back tears. “God, I was so worried about him. I still am, but at least I don’t think he has a brain tumor or something.”

“I don’t know what that is, but it sounds bad.”

She laughed, one of those shaky pre-cry laughs. “Oh, this is Jean. My Jean.”

Eren peered past her and Jean hesitantly made his way over to them. “Hey,” he said awkwardly. “It’s, uh, good to meet you...other Eren.”

“You too,” Eren said, sounding unsure. He glanced over at Levi as though he held the answers. Levi gave him a smile that he hoped was encouraging.  

“Anyway, I’m not waiting for Armin to get here,” Mikasa declared, breaking the awkward silence. “I have questions.”

And they discussed them all. What Mikasa remembered from her dreams, what it was like growing up together in both of their lives. She didn’t shy away from the horror of the other life, and it seemed like Eren appreciated her matter of fact approach.

Jean hung back, only interjecting with a question or two. Once asking, “So you and I aren’t close?”

“Not really,” Eren said. “You’re not always so bad, though,” he added politely.

Jean looked perturbed but fell silent again, letting Mikasa resume her questions.

“We’re not siblings in Eren’s world,” Levi interjected when she asked what it was like for the other Mikasa to have the captain as a brother.

“Really?” she said, startled. “It’s so weird to imagine us not being siblings.”

“You didn’t even know I existed until you were eighteen,” Levi said.

“Fine. It’s hard to imagine knowing you exist and you not being my brother,” Mikasa clarified, rolling her eyes.

Eren’s brows knit together. “It’s harder for me to imagine you being siblings.”  

Mikasa turned back to Eren. “And you said Jean and I aren’t together either?”

Eren shook his head, not looking too pleased at the prospect. “Like I said, a lot’s different.” 

Levi snorted. “An understatement.”

“Whatever,” Jean said lightly, “I loved Mikasa for years before she fell for my charms. I'm sure it's the same there.”

“Jean,” Mikasa said, “Sorry if I wasn’t ‘charmed’ by my younger brother’s friend gaping at me like a fish whenever I walked in the room.”

“I didn’t do that!”

“You did! I liked you when you grew up and asked me out like a normal person.”

“Aw.” Jean smiled fondly at her. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

Eren looked miserable, and Levi gave him a commiserating look.

Once Armin arrived, it all started again from the top.

“What’s Erwin like in your world?” Armin asked after he’d exhausted the lines of questioning about himself.

“He’s a good leader,” Eren said, looking a little perplexed. “Kind too.”  

Armin gave a happy sigh, and Levi fought back an eye roll.

“Hey Eren, is your buddy Armin dating your commander?” Jean asked mischievously, picking up on Eren’s confusion.

Scandalised, Eren said, “What? No!”  

Mikasa laughed at Armin’s blush and said to him, “I’m sure if you ask Erwin nicely he’ll do a bit of roleplay with you.”

“Stop,” Armin groaned, covering his face.

“You brought this on yourself,” Jean put in.

Eren looked at Levi in abject horror, but Levi just shrugged in reply. At least Eren wasn’t brooding anymore.

Though he kept a watchful eye on Eren, Levi kept his distance and let the others lead the conversation. He hoped he’d been able to give Eren some comfort, some clarity with his earlier advice.  On their journey home from the beach, Levi had given Eren the few updates he had and told him to return in a few weeks.

Now all he could offer was distraction until Eren returned home, and seeing the way he smiled as Mikasa and Jean described their wedding, Levi took quiet pride in the fact that his plan seemed to be working.

After everyone had left, Levi and Eren sat together in the living room with a deck of cards between them. It had been a long time since Levi had played cards--he’d needed to go rummaging around one of Eren’s many boxes full of junk in order to find them.

“No, you can’t lay that down,” Levi said. “The number of wildcards can’t outnumber the others.”

“Right, yeah.” Eren sighed, picked the cards back up again and finished his turn with a discard instead.

“You’re picking up on this fast,” Levi said. “You should teach your friends back home how to play.”

“You think so?” Eren asked, a hopeful note in his voice.

Levi drew a card from the pile between them. “Yeah, I do.”

A small smile played on Eren’s lips. “I think that’s a good idea. If I can remember the rules, I mean.”

The day had taken a more peaceful turn, but Levi struggled to relax. A melancholy air hung between them, and if Levi could feel it, then certainly his own Eren must be feeling it ten fold. He was in the belly of the beast, so to speak, stewing in memories and emotions. Now that Levi had experienced it for himself, he suspected Eren’s return would be difficult.

Still he longed for it. He was ready.