#also thank you anna park for the styling <3 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scribhneoir-sidhe · 3 years

Text

TOP 10 READS OF THE YEAR

Okay you can blame this on @dorsalfin, giving me license to ramble about books is always dangerous. Thanks for the opportunity bestie! <3

10. Upright Women Wanted by Sarah Gailey- this was one of the hard copy books I bought for myself before coming to Spain and I finished it in a single afternoon sitting in a park. Absolutely love everything about it, the characters, the writing, the themes. Real comfy novella! I especially like how it plays with setting, it’s Old West styled, but it seems to be maybe post-apocalyptic? Definitely dystopian. Very fun!

9. Texas: The Great Theft by Carmen Boullosa- this was actually a book I read for an English class about literature from the U.S./Mexico border and was probably my favorite thing I’ve read for a class and that includes all the Irish mythology I read for my Celtic narratives class. It begins as such a simple story and rapidly spins out of control until it ends with the most heartbreaking and almost disturbing climax. I wrote an entire paper on how it uses narrative voice and narrator perspective and I’ll still never get enough of it.

8. The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green- it had been a while since I’d read a John Green book! What’s even more surprising is this was non-fiction. I’m hoping to start reading more of that, maybe not exactly along the same lines as this, but branching out more. Anyway, I really liked this one! I actually had to read it at home instead of on the go like I normally do cuz the stories kept making me tear up. I think my favorite is the review of Harvey.

7. The City We Became by N.K. Jemisin- oh man this book! My siblings have been trying to get me to read Jemisin for a while now and I’m so glad I listened to them. This book had a fantastic premise and Jemisin really knows how to turn a phrase, some of the descriptions of the semi-metaphorical city combat gave me chills. I think I would’ve enjoyed it even more if I actually liked NYC, but that can’t be helped. 😂

6. Imperial Radch Trilogy by Anne Leckie- This has been on my TBR list for a while now! Between this and a few of the others, half of this list is just “Genre fiction that grapples with empire and decolonization and such.” I really loved how the trilogy approached personhood when it came to Breq/Justice of Toren, as well as how the empire both shaped and was also expressed by the actions and personalities of its inhabitants. Plus I listened to the trilogy in audiobook form and Adjoa Andoh did an amazing job bringing the characters to life. I particularly liked Presger Translator Dlique/Zeiat!

5. When the Moon Was Ours by Anna Marie McLemore- God I will never get enough of Anna Marie’s writing. I’m definitely picking up a few more of their books when I get back to the states (Libby doesn’t seem to have them). WtMWO is such a subtle book in so many ways, Anna Marie does magical realism so well and I got drawn in almost without realizing it. As always the characters were the best part and the unabashed queerness of everything. I really hope I get to meet Anna Marie again, last time I hadn’t read anything of their’s and now I want to just have dinner with them and chat.

4. Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel- Holy shit this book. Maybe reading a book about a pandemic post-apocalypse was not the best idea at the current moment but I did it anyway. And I’m really glad! Even though it did give me an existential crisis or two in the process, I really enjoyed everything this book did. It’s such an interesting exploration of how people react to the world crumbling, and without a lot of the usual action-movie focus on big set pieces, it had the time to really let everything sink in. I absolutely love the concept of a group of actors and musicians traveling the wasteland, bringing hope and cheer to the survivors, it’s my favorite apocalyptic message.

3. The Masquerade Series by Seth Dickinson- OH BOY! These books are fucked up! Like I kinda knew that going in, hell the titles give you no illusions on what the main character is, but WOW! My reading process for this book was just me periodically going “holy shit, that is so messed up” at the narrative. Also the thought and care put into the worldbuilding are absolutely fantastic and make me want to put that much attention into my own world. Even if I cannot bring myself to be that detailed about the economics.

2. Teixcalaan Series by Arkady Martine- More empire scifi! Again, the worldbuilding is such an integral part of all of these stories; it has to be, the empires themselves are essentially characters. And Martine already won my heart by using aztec inspirations for the Teixcalaanli. The love they have for poetry and allusion was such a fun element, both in a worldbuilding sense and in the way it appears in the actual text, where you can see how it affects their thought process within the narration. Such a fantastic device! I cannot wait for the third book!

1. Broken Earth Trilogy by N.K. Jemisin- All I can say is I understand why this won the Hugo award three years in a row. The first book lit a fire under me, both with the plot twists that seem obvious on the second go around and the excellent theming of oppressed people demanding their autonomy and personhood be recognized. And I can never pass up an anti-nihilistic healing the world story.

All in all, a good haul! I cheated a bit since several of these are series, but I just read a ton this year! Mostly in the last four months tbf. I’m gonna tag @rosemary-and-time-to-sleep, @jadeandquartzes, @libelluslucis and @isaakandreyevs. Plus anyone else who’s interested. Looking forward to seeing what you guys have read!

#My current read count is over 50 books #and I've still got a couple waiting to be read before the 31st #as I have mentioned before I may have a problem #Honorable mention to the Murderbot Diaries the first Mistborn trilogy and The Haunting of Tram Car 015 #books

6 notes · View notes

jidai · 4 years

Text

jidai’s budget mutuals/friends appreciation

Hi, all! I’m quite late with this but I decided to put a small friends and mutual appreciations post in hopes of brightening up the end of this year a little bit. ❤️ If you were tagged, please make sure to check below for a small little message from me. However, I want to make it very clear that I truly appreciate all of my mutuals. You guys brighten up my dash and always reblog or create so many funny and creative posts. I just wanted to give a few special shout outs to those that have taken out the time to reach out and interacted with me past my ask box or we just see each other often.

The messages are ordered by your URL, so you might have to scroll for awhile before you see your messages. I’m so sorry lmao.

Happy New Years, everyone!

@25th, Nonnie, the Young Genius. bro, remind me how old you are 🧍‍♀️ Like my brain CANNOT fathom the thought that you’re so skilled at SO many things and you’re not even in your twenties??? PLEASE SPARE THE TALENT. i will even accept crumbs. But I’m writing to tell you that you are such a wonderful presence on my dash. I always look forward to your gfx. They’re so SO good and you’re improving from one post to another. Like WOW. Now, you’re even starting an art blog, too? You’re so dedicated to the arts. I respect that a lot. Your hard work and commitment will bring you very far in life, whatever you decide to do.

I love interacting with you. You’re such a big sweetheart and full of positivity and energy. I look forward to seeing more of your art and gfx ❤️

@biscuitwalk, Dann, the AK Wiz. Dann, I know you’re not as active on here so idk when or if you will ever read this but I want to say that I miss you and your creations so, so much. I will say it a hundred times over and OVER but you inspire me so goddamn much. You have no fucking idea. Your works are absolutely gorgeous and unique. I can look at it once and I can instantly recognize your style (and your cute lil’ pufferfish <3). The way you utilize colors and implement various techniques, shapes, textures into your work. Goddamn, you’re so good. I always look to your work if I ever need inspiration and they help me brainstorm. God, I wish I could put it into words how much I adore your works.

We didn’t really talk for long but you seemed like such a kind and fun person to be around. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, wherever you are. Stay safe <3

@elriccs, Mirai, the Short King. 🧍‍♀️ ok look I know, I know I’m TERRIBLE at replying to you and I’m so fucking sorry. I absolutely love to talk to you but my dumbass cannot seem to reply in a timely manner LASELKSAL. That’s on me and I gotta do better. Anyways!!! Thank you SO fucking much for always leaving such kind messages on my work. I swear to god you’re one of my biggest hype man and I ALWAYS look forward to reading your tags. They’re so funny and it makes me all tingly and happy inside. Bro, like, you just radiate big fun vibes, bro. I really hope that I can get to know you better so I can just insult you until it’s too late to walk away </3

And of course, let me also remind you that I love your works so much. They way that you utilize your textures and those muted colors... OOMPH *chefs kiss* I will always love--

@lockhvrts, Em the Soulsborne GOD. hi em 🥺 it’s been awhile since I’ve had a proper conversation with you and I hope you’re doing okay! I miss you and our conversations where we do nothing but geek out and complain about the game industry lmao. if you manage to read this, I just wanted to let you know I miss your presence here. It’s been kinda dull not seeing your beautiful soulsborne gifs and your game rants. Let’s catch up soon. <3 stay safe and well!

@nathanprescutt, Benn, the Man. BENNNNNNNN. I love you a lot bro. I know we haven’t had long conversations for some time and I hope I can change that! You were my first friend on this blog and I will always appreciate it. I remember us just geeking out over your works and how I would always send you a gfx request like once a week LMAO. The one thing that I have always appreciated about you was the fact that you’re very opinionated (if not, very vocal on your stance on things) and you hold your ground. There were a few time where you encouraged me to speak on topics that I think I shouldn’t and that stuck with me for quite awhile. I’m still a nervous rambling mess when it comes to debates but just know that the one time you supported me to voice my opinion--I hold it very dear to my heart.

While I don’t spend much time together, I will always remember our animal crossing session. It was so much fun just trashing and chilling on your island. Especially the bar :( that bar was fucking AMAZING. Maybe once FFXVI comes out, we can geek out hehe

Also, thank you so much for sending in photos of all your doggos, omg. I miss seeing them so much I hope they’re doing well. Stay hot, my German bro lol. Ich bin sehr dankbar, so eine tolle Freundin zu haben. ❤️❤️❤️

@noxdivina, Lin the Big Dick Daddy Kind. The church is open for business bitch and I’m here to preach the GOSPEL.

Okay, jokes aside, I’m really happy that we became mutuals. You’ve always give off this like, mysterious cosmic vibe (????? huh). And your selfies just further proves that you are wtf. But you’re always so kind to those that you interact with. You’re an absolutely sweetheart and like I just want to give you a giant hug every time we interact. You’re such a soft human being. It’s so nice being around you. It’s like being tossed in the oven and baked at 250 degrees F for 25 minutes. And to boot you’re really talented, hello? God really said let there be a perfect human being and yeeted you into the universe. Thank you for always leaving such kind messages and words in my DM/askbox/works. I cherish them so much. I hope I can get to know you better in the future bc you’re rad, bro <3

anyways, updated drawing of u and maya:

i always assume you’re in a black fur parka 24/7 and maya is coatless neck down. also deck me with those jacked arms of yours thanks 🧍‍♀️

(edit: fuck i forgot to draw a PARTY HAT ON MAYA IM SORRY)

@rokuseis, Sei, the Dumber.

i have nothing to say to you go away you banana hater ASELKSAEKL

BITCH, you doo bee getting on my nerve 24/7/365 🧍‍♀️ you were an unexpected but a very welcomed addition to my life. I can’t believe we really went 1 fuckin’ year without speaking to each other and then suddenly our friendship blew up because over a stupid BANANA. Now you gotta deal with me and my stupid, random, crude ass messages daily. I cannot. Clown to clown communication. But thank you so much bitch for being there for me and telling all of these funny ass stories and life experiences.

I know I don’t say it a lot because when we talk it’s literally just dogs barking at each other but I want to make it clear now: I love your humor and vibe so much. You never fail to make me laugh anytime I talk to you and I appreciate it so much. I can’t tell you how many times I felt better after talking to you. Even though sometimes your fucking jab hits hard and I end up actually inSULTED BY IT. But thank you for becoming my friend and I look forward to all of our stupid moments together. Looking forward to shitting in your sink when I finally fly to your home <3

@wolfamongthem, Anna, the Grinch. Please don’t hurt me for that title. I'm just saying if someone needs a live casting, it’ll be u. Anyways, did you know that I was so fucking intimidated by you for a long ass time, even before we became mutuals aseljas LMAO. I always see your gifs around on explore and they’re so gorgeous and then I look at your text posts and it’s u roasting people like there’s no tomorrow- 🧍‍♀️ bitch I was SCARED OF U KSKS. Now that I’ve talked to you a few times, you’re really funny like where do you find those reaction memes????? Like bro you and your shitposts is my morning cup of coffee.

Anyways, in 2021 I expect a full-fledge review of all AAA games from you-- no more shit talking in the tags let it all out BITCH. Thank you for being such a great mutual! I look forward to see what weird shit you will send me the next time we talk lmao

@zenien, Selm, the I’m-gay-for-Lady-Maria-or-anything-that-moves-in-BB-Bitch™. ok bitch if I’m being honest I wrote yours last so my brain is FRIED. so everything i say from here is raw from the HEARt cause that’s all I got left. But anyhow, we savin’ the best for last! honestly, i didn’t expect you to barge into my life like that. i really didn’t. i was just gonna keep admiring with my 7 feet (2.1336 meters) pole. I’m glad you made the first move because look where we are wtf 🧍‍♀️ friends??? I wouldn’t believe you if you told me that in 2014 when I first followed you lmao.

You’re such a kind soul. I know you may disagree but I’m determined to convince you. I can’t tell you how much I want to thank you for taking the time to talk to me during my rough bits. It’s like sitting on a wooden bench in a park during sunset and you sit next to me, just enjoying the vast sky. You radiate such peaceful energy. It’s very calming. Or you know, 2 seconds later i’m suddenly suplexed by your 40 tons of insults like what--

Thank you for everything, so far. Truly. It’s been so fun listening to you talk about your Bloodborne journey and see your reactions live. It’s been so fun to see you post your graphics and it continues to blow me away. It’s been so fun hearing about your life and the stories of your adulthood. Every words that we have exchanged, I hold dearly to my heart--more than you ever know. Love u bitch.

#for mutuals #mutuals don't ask about your titles i was being quirky LMAO #this took so long so i hope it works properly sksks #it hasn't been proofread so enjoy the mess

17 notes · View notes

chemiste · 4 years

Text

Foresight ~ ch. 9

a/n : cool cool, heres ch 9, ALSO i will be posting y/n’s assignment when it’s all finished so that’ll be a couple chapters later, that’s why you’re not seeing certain pics rn. love y’all, please talk to me if you want id love to hear what y’all have to say, any thoughts theories about the story? whats going on in your life? tell meeeeeeeeee!!!!!

mah masterlist

“Guys, we’ve got a problem.”

Mitch said from the main section of the tour bus. You had been trying to get a few more hours asleep, but the soft rumble of the tour bus was changed to screams from outside the bus.

You moved your curtain back and stepped out into the bedroom compartment, rubbing the sleep from your eye.

“What is that…”

The words died on your tongue as you looked through the blackout veils in the living room. It was crazy. It was like all of Denmark was there, crowding around the Royal Arena, excitedly anticipating Harry’s arrival.

“So this is what 10,000 people looks like huh.”

You said, still a bit gobsmacked. You looked around at who was in the main compartment and saw Harry sitting on the left couch.

You plopped down beside him and threw your legs up onto the remaining part of the couch, leaning arm again his chest. With his right hand, the poster had been scrolling through Instagram, looking at all the postings from fans for tonight.

On the other couch, Jeff was on a call chatting with someone about the new people barrier they’d need to get through.��

He ended the call, “The good news is our other buses were able to get here early enough and unload in the back before the crowd started. The problem now is getting us through the crowd, I called ahead and we’re gonna turn around and take an SUV in to try and be more inconspicuous. Everyone, what you need for the show cause we wont be able to get back to the tour bus till afterwards.”

The group complied and went into the back rooms as the tour bus exited the Arena parking, heading to the secret location where you all would switch vehicles for attempt number two.

You straighten your duvet out, having not pulled out anything during the drive so you didn’t have anything to pack. You glanced over to Harry who was shoving a stray piece of paper that had scribbles all over them into a journal that seemed overstuffed. “

Are those lyrics?” You asked, slinging your backpack onto your shoulder. His eyes looked up at you briefly and then he nodded.

“Yeah, uh, just writin’ whenever I can yeh know?”

You put your shoes back on and headed into the living compartment.

“Alright everyone off and into the SUV pronto so any fans that decided to follow the tour bus don’t intercept our exit.”

Jeff said, taking the keys from the rental man who handed them to him.

You all piled into the SUV, you and Clare in the very back, then Hélène, Harry squished in the middle, Sarah, and then Mitch with Jeff in the front.

“I’m a big boy why I’m I the one sitting ‘ere in the middle!”

He whined as the SUV pulled out onto the road, making his knees hit the console.

You laughed and pulled out your phone for a quick picture, but you weren’t fast enough as Harry snatched your mobile device out of your hand.

“Hey! Give that back you, thief!”

“Nope! I think we need som’ pictures of you know junebug,” the poster cackled, turning the flash on and leaning into Sarah’s lap to take a bunch of snaps of you crawling from the backseats.

You groaned and put your hand up to block the flash dots that had been clouding your eyes.

“Come on! Do better than that Y/N!”

He teased, you responded by changing you hand briefly to flip him off and then to a rocker hand sign. Satisfied, the boy handed you your phone back, that stupid smirk donned on his face.

Cute stupid smirk…

Huh? Psh, yeah whatever.

“Okay crouch everyone, we’re pulling in.”

Jeff called as he pulled into the Arena parking lot again. You watched as the SUV got through easier than last time. You could see from your crouched position some of the fans lined up, or walking together to the doors.

Some were holding signs, others had matching t-shirts. They all seemed so elated to be here, and it made you proud of Harry.

You looked up and saw Harry doing what you had been, watching his fans. A small smile grew on his face and you could see how truly appreciative he was of his fans.

Finally the SUV got to the back gate where the other tour buses had been stationed, Jeff rolled down his window and gave the man at the booth his pass. After it had been approved, the gate opened and allowed the SUV in, closing immediately as some fans tried to slip through but to no avail.

“One more time everyone, 3, 2, 1.”

The beats for Carolina started to play, and the band started up again, Harry standing in the middle of the stage still in sweats, hanging not changed yet.

It had been a few hours since they were able to get and now were just adjusting a few things for the performance like always.

You were sitting on the stage off to the side, laptop in lap. Those assignments didn’t do themselves. You were going through your photos, trying to see if any recent pictures matched some of the words you needed for your last assignment.

After that you head back to the dressing room, having time to kill as the band gets dressed and pampered. You decide to check in with Maggie and give her an update.

It was March 30th now, you were in Barcelona sprinting through the aisles as Harry performed Kiwi.

The concerts had been going well, Norway and Germany were beautiful but it all went by so fast that your memories seemed blurry.

But you remembered your off day yesterday with crystal-like perspective.

“Harry, look at this field oh my god have you seen anything more beautiful!?!”

You and Harry had taken the day off to find something of nature since the only thing y’all had been around the previous week were cement walls.

The both of you stumbled along a lovely meadow in a hill dip about an hour away from Barcelona, where he would be performing tomorrow night. The grass was tall and vivacious, little purple and pink flowers sprang up in between the stems.

H turned to you with a smile that resembled a kid on Christmas Day. He looked absolutely soft and sweet, wearing that blue and white striped hoodie. You matched him slightly, wearing a white sweater and blue skirt complemented by thigh-high boots to keep your legs warm.

“Woohoo!”

He yelled as he ran straight into the flowery abyss and flopped into the ground. You trotted over to him, laughing and snapping photos of the hill line and the fluffy white clouds.

He giggled and you looked down to the boy underneath you. You took a picture of him and smiled.

Scanning back through the photos on the small screen, you think if you’d been a least a foot farther from him you wouldn’t have heard what he said quietly.

“You’re very pretty yeh know.”

You snapped up to look at him, a bit surprised from the compliment.

“Oh, thank you. You are too.”

He crinkled his nose at your response, groaning and then sitting up enough to wrap an arm around your was it and drag you down to his level.

“Harry!”

You scream, sorta laughing as your fall was buffered by the flower bed. The sky was lovely, a bright blue. Clouds were scattered around and the wind slightly pickup, making you shiver.

“Come ‘ere.”

He said softly, pulling you rest your head don his chest. You held your camera up to his face, showing him a picture.

“This one is gonna be for ‘silly’.” You said.

“It’s perfect.”

You thought so too.

A cheer shook you out of your trip down memory lane.

Right, the concert.

You gripped you camera in your hand and scanned the stage to find the boy you were suppose to be taking shots over.

Or off of…

Stop it Y/N!

He looked good, decked out in the black and white patterned suit.

“ ‘ve ripped man trousers!” You heard him say with a laugh.

You rolled your eyes, this boy. After a few more songs, he starts up Anna and you laugh. Oh this song.

You’re taking photos, bopping slightly to it, hey it’s a catchy song!

But then he turns to you and gives you a smile.

Oh no.

The lights shining off his suit and hair make him seem like he’s sparkling, and that smile just made your heart stop.

It’s like you’re fully seeing him in a different light and it’s breathtaking.

Oh, fuck, maybe I do like him.

You’re pacing in your hotel room.

Slightly freaking out.

“I like him! I can’t believe it, Maggie was right I’ve got a stupid crush! I can’t— this, how?”

You talk to yourself, trying to figure out when it all added up for you. The little touches, him saving you from the crowd that one time, sneaking out and touring Amsterdam, even the way you interacted with each other was different from the rest of the band.

“I’m—I’m totally overthinking this right? There’s no way…”

You’ve never felt this way before, the heart races when he smiles, the look he gives you after a laugh, when you hug or snuggle into him on the couch, how his cologne smells making you feel at home and loved.

You stopped pacing.

“Oh my god, am I in love with Harry Styles?!”

Yes, yes I am.

You turn, gobsmacked and flop onto your bed.

What am I gonna do…

You’re in the terminal in at 5am, waiting for the flight to Milan.

It’s dead quiet sans the occasional custodian worker of business group getting off an all-night flight.

You’re standing at a sunglass kiosk, trying on different pairs in the little round mirror set up. The band is across the wide walkway sitting on various chairs waiting for the flight.

Maybe or maybe not you’d been slightly avoiding Harry since the night of your little proclamation. During the Madrid show, you’d opted out of taking photos, instead going out to look around the city and maybe pick up enough stupid tourist gifts to make you forget.

Thankfully Harry didn’t seem to notice your sudden change in moods, unfortunately it meant he was coming over to you right now and you couldn’t stop it.

“Like any of the sunnies?”

He asked, grabbing a pair and popping them on and making a funny face at. You shrugged, not answering.

Oh great, now he seemed to have picked up on your inner turmoil when you didn’t speak, taking the glasses off and putting them back in their rightful place.

“You okay?”

He asked quietly, concern coating the edge of his words.

You nodded, pushing back some of you hair behind your ear and turning to the small mirror to look at your reflection.

“ ‘m just a bit tired.” You answered, hoping that would be enough for him.

He nodded, thinking for a moment then holding up his phone.

“Picture?”

You smiled, “H it’s 5am I don’t look the nicest for a picture right now”

“Oh come on Y/N you’re gorgeous any time of day.”

Not helping.

“Fine fine, but I don’t want to be seen.”

He opened the camera and pointed it into the mirror, “Okay then how are we gonna take this picture love?”

You wrapped you hands around his head to cover his eyes, “Like this goofball.”

He smiled, “You’re the goofball right now.”

After throwing up a peace sign with his spare hand, he snapped the picture and then checked to see if it was good.

“I like, ‘m gonna post it.”

You yawned and nodded to his statement.

Guess I wasn’t fully lying, I am pretty tired.

“H, we’re ready to go.”

Mitch called, you both grabbed your suitcases and rejoined the group, following the flight attendant into the small plane.

You were first in line down the aisle and quickly found a seat in the back of the plane, hoping Harry would opt to sit with someone else a few seats in front of you, after all there were only about 20 seats in the plane, hopefully he’d pick not pick the one right next to you.

I’ve got too much to think about, I might burst into flames if I have to smell his vanilla spice cologne for the next two hours.

“Mind if I sit here?”

Fuck.

“Yeah sure.”

He slid into the seat with ease, tucking his bag under the chair. You curled into the corner of your seat, trying to put a small bit of distance between you but not too much to make him worried.

Harry turned to look at you, propping his left elbow up on the squishy armrest between the two of you.

“I remember the first tour we did fo’ 1D, got ’t was hectic. Stupid, teenagers on the road wit’ too much money an’ not enough discipline. The first month was crazy, all of us high on the feelin’ of performing once we’d gotten over the stage fright, then immediately going t’ a new town, meetin all these people, ’t was a dream. But then a couple months later we could feel the toll, I don’t think I really realized how exhausted I was from touring until the last night where instead o' celebratin, I went to sleep right when we entered the hotel an’ didn’t wake up till 3pm the next day.”

Harry’s little heart spill didn’t help you too much with your dilemma, might’ve just made you fall for him even more, but you appreciated the fact that he was trying to let you know he knew the feeling.

“Thanks H.”

You mumbled, face squished into the headrest of your seat.

He patted his shoulder, “Come ‘ere, yeh can fall asleep on me.”

Your eyes widen, “Oh, don’t worry about it, I’m fine—“

“Nonsense, come on, you’ll wake up without a creak in yo’r neck yea?”

Fuck it.

“Alright.”

You scooched over and nestled into the British heart-throb, soaking in that damn vanilla cologne you’d sworn to avoid.

He laid his head on top of yours and you made yourself relax, cause you couldn’t deny it, it was pretty comfy like this with him.

Pretty comfy indeed.

During the concert, all you can think about while taking pictures is how the Styles boy might be sweeping you right off your feet.

The little dance moves he makes, so erotic but beautiful in the same way, like he’s in another room dancing on his own in the dark. The way he throws he head back during certain parts of a song, caught up in the moment—

She’s such a good girl,

“Be professional! You’re on job for gods sake,” You muttered to yourself, raising the camera again.

She feels so good,

But then you lower the camera again to watch as he rocked his hips with the beat, jaw-dropping at the sight. You looked up to his face as he turns, that was now looking at you.

He started to strut on the stage, slowing making his way to you, eye contact unwavering.

“I met her once and wrote a song about her

I wanna scream, yeah

I wanna shout it out

And I know she hears me now.”

Hold on, knows?!

He finally let his eyes drift back to the crowd, singing la la las with the rest of the band.

You on the other hand, were having a miniature heat attack.

The gesture was so raw, so real, too real. It’s like he was talking to your soul, reaching out to tell you—

Does this mean he likes me too?

telephone hour for this chapter!

mah masterlist

65 notes · View notes

iamacolor · 4 years

Text

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works.

I was tagged by @rainbowv thank you so much (i love your edits btw in case you don’t know yet just saying it again) this year has been fun editing-wise because i used to mainly gif tv shows and so I started giffing things like mvs and I got to discover many new techniques and challenge myself! I wish I could’ve done more drama gifs or aesthetic sets but that’s a goal for next year 😊 here’s my selection (no real order):

1) fave shots of jiu in mvs: i started this dreamcatcher serie for handong and I’m so glad i decided to do it for all the members as it really made me get deeper into the fandom and improve my giffing skills. this is my fave of them all, I didn’t plan on making it colour themed but purple just fitted her so well! and so that’s my first (and only so far but hopefully not last) edit based on a colour theme, which i found really fun to make and it’s a nice challenge to make different mvs/colouring/lighting match!

2) faceless shots in flower fantasy mv : that video was so pretty and it was so nice to focus on the aesthetic of it and try to showcase it nicely and I like how this sets highlights n.flying through their instruments

3) various animated genres in it’s okay to not be okay: this drama has been a highlight for me this year and the way it was directed and used mutliple genres of storytelling across the plotlines was so interesting and so I’m glad I found the motivation to gif it even if at the time I wasn’t really in the mood, i loved making the compilation of moments and seeing so many people in the tags saying that this was one of their favourite aspect of the show made it even more special!

4) every outfit in “boca” mv: that gifset is kind of crazy, it wasn’t supposed to include every outfits at first but then I thought “why make a choice when I could instead struggle to fit all 24 of them in one set?” so it was challenging but all the more satisfying when it came out looking great! loved the styling in this mv and I’m glad I could showcase it nicely

5) yseult - new opera: i don’t gif a lot of stuffs outside of tv shows, dramas and kpop so this was a bit out of my comfort zone but she’s one of my favourite artist at the moment and that video was so beautiful, I loved working on it even if giffing mainly b&w shots can be a bit challenging and I wasn’t sure about including the coloured ones at the end but I’m glad I did. i know most people reblogged it for the aesthetic but I hope they also went to check her songs!

6) taeyong master of his craft: made this for @tytrack who inspired me to start using vapoursynth and get back into giffing and so that’s my first gifset with it! i probably would do it a bit differently today but i really enjoyed discovering this tool and using it to highlight taeyong’s abilities and showcasing that side of him, this set was my first compilation set this year and it’s something I’ve really enjoyed doing! and in general doing stuffs for other people has been a huge motivation this year I love it it’s so fun

bonus: i’ve also enjoyed making some sillier edits to have fun and this nct/parks and rec one and this jiu one are some of my faves

I really have no idea who’s done this or not so apologies if you’ve been tagged before or have done this before, but even if you don’t do it, this is to say I really enjoy your work and seeing you on my dash 💜 @tytrack @lkeonhee @chawoongs @7nsomnia @anna-something @kdongyoung @nctpinks @melonatures @moonbinning @nfly5 @grayson-richard @myunghjun

#just realised it says 5 or so and not 5 or more but hey this is self-love you can't contain that #tagged #my edits

5 notes · View notes

jj-lynn21 · 5 years

Text

The Calling ch 4

Warnings: toxic masculinity, bi/gay characters, 70s key party scene

Notes: This went a little long. For those that want a little more intimacy with Sebastian Stan that will come in the last chapter, I promise. The story went in some surprising directions but I just went with it.

ch 1, ch 2 ch 3

First you shower, then you take a better look at the email. The costume requests a 70s style. Example photos are included. Burnt oranges, faded reds, hot pants, white and black paired with the burnt orange are the color scheme. Tired as you are you rip through your closet to find a few things that will hopefully do. You pack red hot pants paired with a white t-shirt, a wrap-around skirt with a fitted silky tank top with a jean jacket, and decide to put out a burnt orange romper you find in the back of your closet you never wear to wear there.

Then you finally crash for the night dreaming what a house party themed shoot would entail. Because of who you have already worked with your mind pairs Bill Skarsgard and Tom holland in crazy 70 cloths, Shirts unbuttoned. Lots of gold chains around their chests. Alcohol flowing as you chat about school, work or something even less significant the taste of the beer you are all consuming. As you get drank in this dreamland you are laying all over them. Their hands touching all parts of your body. Leaning closer in to take…your alarm goes off its 4am.

You get ready and head out the door with that ever-necessary caffeine buzz in hand. Its rainy and cold which just makes you feel more sluggish. But as soon as you pull up to park where the bright yellow signs say to it is game on acting face. You are not tired, even though your eyes say differently, you are ready to do whatever they need you to and be here as long as they keep you.

“Good morning everyone, I’m Shelly.” The woman that checked you in said to everyone. “We have donuts, coffee and breakfast burrito at the tables in the back. As soon as all the crew are done, we will tell you so you can have breakfast. Today we need extras for an elevator scene and the key party scene. If you don’t know what a key party was, it was a 70s swingers party where the men dropped their keys in a bowl when they arrived with their partner and the woman would pick keys on their way out and go home with whoever belonged with the keys. The director has personally chosen who she wants to include in these scenes so Markus will be calling for you when everyone is ready on set. Have a great day.”

The older gentleman at your table starts talking about him and a girl he dated had been to one of these parties in their 20s. They didn’t know it was a key party when their friends invited them. When they went to leave someone spoke up. His girlfriend didn’t participate but instead berated him in the car. They broke up soon after that not because of what the party was about but because she was always on his ass about things he liked, and she didn’t. He wasn’t really interested in a party like that so, when the same friends invited him and his current wife to a party at their house, he made sure to ask what kind of party it was before accepting the invite. You meet so many interesting people being an extra actor.

Marcus comes in with a clipboard and calls you and a blonde guy barely a foot taller than you, Vic you heard someone call him earlier, to walk to set with him. Everything was set up in the building you were in today. There was lighting and other equipment around an elevator. A key had it set to stay open.

“Step right in here,” Marcus said.

He positioned the two of you looking at each other holding hands.

“You two are a great couple.” He smiled. “Just get to know each other if you haven’t met yet. I think you will be working together in the other scene scheduled today. Anna Paquin and Sebastian Stan will be in here shortly.”

Marcus leaves the two of you alone. You interduce yourself and ask his name.

“I’m Vic, sweetheart.” He smirked. “I guess they put us together because I get to go home with something better at this key party scene.”

You rolled your eyes trying to ignore this guy that was coming off as a real asshole. You were stuck with him. At the other scene since you were supposed to be in such an open relationship it was your character that would be getting something better you thought.

Anna comes in the elevator in a red low V-neck shiny bathing suite type outfit. She also wears A sunhat, sunglasses and boots. You smile but turn away, so you are not distracting her while she is working. You are not there to chat up actors. Everyone has a job to do.

Vic turns to her, “Last time I saw you, you were naked on my TV banging some whine bitch vampire.”

She lowers her glasses, “That was a long long time ago. But I’m still fucking that sexy man and if I choose, I could have your girl too.”

“Oh, I just met this guy,” You chime in finally turning back to look at her. “I think he’s being extremely rude.”

“Alright, come with me sweetie,” Anna smiles and reaches for your hand. “You stay here for the time being.” She puts her finger in Vic’s face.

You go with her out of the elevator. Down the hall to anther room where the director sat at a desk.

“We have a problem with one of the extras being a fucking rude dick to me and this girl.” Anna said. “I’m sorry sweetie, what’s your name?”

You tell her your name. Then bite your inner lip nervously as the director stares at you and then looks to Anna.

“What did he say to you Anna?” She asked.

“He said something about seeing me naked fucking a vampire when he saw me last.” Anna spit the word like they tasted bad in her mouth. “I of course had a witty retort but men like that should not be employed here or anywhere in my opinion. I don’t care what I choose to do on film. The way he was talking to me was uncalled for. I won’t press charges, which I could for verbal abuse by a co-worker, but I want him gone.”

The director looks to you. “And you heard him?”

“Yes,” you said quietly. “And he was rude to me before Anna came in. Not exactly on the same level but I agree with what Anna said.”

“Ok, he’s out.” The director got on her walkie to tell the P.A. and Assistant casting director to send Vic home without pay. She would discuss the matter farther after the shoot wrapped today. “Now, is there another male extra you worked with before you could work with again today?” She looks to you.

“How do you know she wants to be with a guy.” Anna said. “Maybe she would be more comfortable with a woman.”

“Thanks Anna, but I haven’t gotten to know many of the woman here.” You said. “Rich um Richard is a friendly guy to work with. We already have a work friendship. I don’t know his last name, but he is wearing a light blue leisure suit.”

The director gets on the walkie again to call for Richard to meet at the elevator. “That should clear things up. Now let’s get this scene shot ladies.” She walks back to the elevator with you.

Sebastian Stan is there chatting with one of the crew members. They both look as the director said, “Let’s get this show on the road.”

Sebastian nods to Anna, “Hey Anna, who’s your friend?”

She introduces you as Richard is walking up with the P.A.. He just says, “hey.” More to you than anyone else.

Sebastian reaches his hand out for Richard to shake, “What’s up man? What’s your name since we will be working together.”

Richard looks nervous, “I’m Richard but everyone just calls me Rich.”

The A.D. shovels everyone into the elevator, “Enough chit chat. Time to work. You can chat at the wrap party tomorrow night at O’Brian’s. Now my extras just hangout in your little corner looking enamored with each other. I believe you have done that before together in another film. Anna and Sebastian do your thing.”

Anna stands in the corner of the elevator ogling Sebastian’s behind. Rich makes you giggle quietly in the other corner as he pretends to tell you a secret as his hand rest on the small of your back. Your hands are on his chest.

“Action.” The A.D. yelled.

Anna said, “Those beers for the party tonight, Peter?”

Sebastian said, “Yep.”

“I think My boyfriend and I will be coming tonight.” She said.

“I guarantee you will.” He walks out of the elevator.

“Cut,” The A.D. said.

You are doing your best not to burst out laughing at the cheesy suggestive dialogue. And you have to hold that laugh and to be all romantic with your friend in the elevator.

On the next take Richard whispers, “I don’t need to wait until the party. I’m going to come right here. He is too hot.”

Your giggle is louder. Cut is called. “Sorry,” you say.

You manage to control yourself for the next several takes. The scene is done shooting within a few hours which pasted by quickly in your mind. To much fun. Lunch is setting up when you and Rich are taken back to the holding room. You didn’t get much time with Sebastian who you agree with Rich was looking hot. But maybe he will talk to you at the wrap party the A. D. was talking about. You made a note on your phone to look up O’Brian’s in the area for tomorrow night.

After the BBQ lunch buffet, everyone was led downstairs to a house party set. The P.A. and A.D. set everyone up where they want them. Some sitting, some standing but all in groups of couples two to four with prop drinks in their hands. A table is covered with snacks and drinks. The A.D. takes you and Rich outside the door to the makeshift apartment door.

“You two will be the next couple through the door,” He said. “We will film you walking through a few times at different angles. Then film Sebastian’s character greeting you. Rich you toss the keys we give you in the bowl to the right as you enter. Just have fun with it like you really want to be at this party.”

You both nod. Rich slides his hand around your waist. The prop person hands him a set of keys. They film you walking to the door and Richard opens it but 5 time from different ankles. When the camera is right in front of your face it’s a little nerve racking, but you manage not to look at it. Then they film you coming in from the other side of the door about five times. Once a continuous shot to where Sebastian’s character walks up to you both after Rich tosses the keys in an empty fish bowl, Shakes Rich’s hand, hugs you and excuses himself as he looks towards the door. That doesn’t work very well.

They reset for you and Rich to walk over to Sebastian’s character and him to greet you both before his attention is taken towards the door. You film the greeting about ten times at multiple angles. You can’t see who has come through the door behind you but several of the couples seem excited to see them raising their glasses in a greeting. Maybe they were told to do that or that it would be natural in the moment.

Next you are told to go sit on the burnt orange chair together. You sit on Rich’s lap with prop beer to sip.

“You can react how ever you see fit within the context of the party scene when the next two actors come in the door to be greeted.” The A.D. said. “We will then move on to some music playing and the two of you will get up to slow dance. Once Anna grabs keys from the bowl and exits the room with Sebastian, you take the next key to exit the party with Alex who will be playing Ryan.”

“Cool,” you and Rich said.

Anna comes through the door with Alex Skarsgard. You almost drop your drink. Instead of letting your mouth drop wide you bite you lip and look to Rich. He looks as surprised and exited as you.

“You bitch, getting to trade me for him” He whispers. “I’m so jealous.”

Their entrance is film from all angles needed. Next Peter Frampton’s Baby I Love Your Way plays. Alex and Anna start to dance. You and Richard get up to dance. A few more couples do as Sebastian watches from the sidelines. They keep rolling as Sebastian walks up to take Alex’s place and Alex taps Rich on the shoulder to take his place. You thought Rich was going to pass out when Alex touched him. You kept a smile on your face as Rich went to sit down. You looked up at Alex with big eyes. After taking your hand to put around his neck Alex put his forehead to yours swaying to the song.

“Cut,” The A.D. yells.

Alex straightens up. “Hi, Princess. I’m Alex. Anna told me what the two of you went through earlier. I would like to apologize for the assholes of my gender. I hope the rest of your filming is a good experience.”

His voice is so smooth and tender. You just barely get out a, “Thanks.”

When you walk back over to reset your position with Richard he said, “You bitch. I am so jealous over here as you get all up close and personal with that big sexy man.”

“I know right.” You laugh.

“Action,” is called.

You run though that part of the scene several more times. Getting more comfortable each time. After one take Sebastian comes over and Alex introduces you. Anna joins the group. You are kind of stunned standing there and the three of them being all casual as inside you just can’t believe your life at this moment.

Sebastian’s eyes crawl over you as he asks about the other films you worked on. You tell him a few things but keep it a little cryptic. The A.D. calls places.

Before you go Sebastian said, “hopefully we get to chat more at the cast party.”

You said, “Sure.” Before going back to your position with Rich.

“Why are you taking all my dates for after work,” Rich whispers in your ear.

You giggle, “fate I guess.”

You try to keep doing the same things over and over. How you position your hands and when you giggle at what Rich says. He does make a great scene partner since he keeps you entertained. Alex always positions you when he comes over to take Rich’s place. And you let him have total control because he makes it so easy. You are not even nervous by the fifteenth take.

Last shooting of the day. Anna saunters over to the key filled fishbowl to grab keys. Sebastian grins as they walk towards the back where there is a hallway that leads to his bedroom. You get up and pick keys up and hold them dangling with a grin on your face as Alex crosses the room and escorts you out the door. You only need to film that five times to get angles and things.

The filming day ends. You drive home with some great memories. The incident with Vic not even registering in your mind.

#sabastian stan #fanfic #fan fiction #anna paquin #alex skarsgard #70s #key party #original story #au #gay character #bi character #filming #being an extra #fantasy #dreaming

10 notes · View notes

xoruffitup · 6 years

Text

Burn This First Preview: 3/15 Show Report

OKAY it’s 3 AM and I’m writing this on my phone so the format might be weird, but I have SO MANY thoughts and feels from tonight I’ve got to let the tidal wave out!!

First off - Yes, he looked gorgeous at stage door and he was so kind trying to sign for everyone he could! (The line was longggg.) I GOT HIS AUTOGRAPH AND THANKED HIM FOR SUCH A MOVING PERFORMANCE AND HE SAID “OH THANK YOU VERY MUCH” AND LOOKED UP AT ME WITH HIS GORGEOUS EYES AND GORGEOUS FACE AND THERE IS A PIC OF THIS MOMENT THAT WILL FOREVER LIVE IN MY HEART:

This is my new OTP, folks: Adam/The back of my head!

I attempted to ask for a pic but was hesitant and security had already half pulled him away so he was like “I don’t know if I’ll have time” sounding so nervous about getting to the whole line. BABY <333

Aksjsknsm I can’t believe I was this close to him - It hasn’t fully set in and omg I better just keep writing before it does set in and I lose my shit completely!

Play Highlights! (This list is Plot-Spoiler free.)

Alas, sadly there is not that much nakedness. He takes his pants off in Act 1 but has underwear and a long shirt on. The BEST is when he comes on wearing one of Keri/Anna’s kimono-style purple silk robes in Act 2 - I nearly DIED and cannot believe I saw that with my own eyes!! When he first steps onstage the robe’s open and he’s only wearing underwear so you get a nice chest glimpse, but then he sadly ties it. (Then proceeds to hilariously struggle with getting one of his arms through the complicated sleeves.) Oh, and did I mention the robe was paired with knee-high socks?

Adam is HYSTERICAL. He doesn’t come on stage for about the first twenty minutes, but when he did, it took all of 5 minutes for the audience to be in the palm of his hand, laughing at every other word he said. His delivery of all of Pale’s curse-laden, barely-logical rants and complaints is just masterful in comedic timing and effect. He’s a literal hurricane when he enters the show, flooding the stage with this frenetic, chaotic energy so intense he’s practically vibrating. He keeps everything at break neck pace, through 0-100 highs and lows where he’s bitching about parking one second, then animal-wail crying the next.

His character’s not likeable. Really, this is a testament and praise to Adam’s acting. After his first couple minutes on stage, there were stretches when I literally forgot it was him. When I was so taken in and then repulsed by this character in turns, his acting prowess overcame even my instinct to love him and everything he does on sight. I’m about to get deeper into the weeds on his character in the next section, but suffice it to say Adam’s performance is stellar and completely, convincingly transformative.

How heated does it get? The only intimate scene that happens in front of the audience includes some slow kissing, a bit down Keri/Anna’s neck, and wandering hands. The rest is implied off stage.

The play is set in the 80s, so while Keri looks KILLER in every single outfit, Adam’s suits are all big and baggy as was the style then and they’re not exactly flattering. His costume look is just a bit weird, not nearly as smolderingly hot as how they styled him in the promo pics. But even with that said.... The scene where they’re both close on the couch, talking softly before kissing happens? I would have still gone for him too. ;_;

The rest of this report is going to dive into and attempt to untangle some of the deeper elements and themes of the play. Stop reading here if you’re avoiding spoilers!

To my perspective, this wasn’t really a play about a smoldering, ill-advised love affair. Yes, that’s the main event, but this play is about so much more.

Anna and Pale are star-crossed lovers. No, not in the Disney or destined interpretation - I mean the proper, tragic meaning. Whatever is between them should not exist. Whatever is between them threatens and harms them both. Whatever is between them is not long for this world, and doesn’t belong in it.

But why doesn’t it belong? Sure, there are the technical, superficial reasons: Anna has a boyfriend; Pale is married with kids (though technically separated); They are polar opposite people - Sharing no visible common interests and with temperaments that couldn’t be more opposite.

What is the one thing stronger than all of that, which first brings them together? Their grief; Their shared (yet deeply personal and divergently different) senses of grief; The solace and understanding they can only find for that grief with each other. The loss they’ve both experienced is life-changing, and has no place to fit into or even exist at all in their normal lives.

And so, they hurtle into an affair that also has no place existing in their normal lives. By the end of the play, they both assert “I don’t want this.” To a certain degree, it’s the truth. It’s unlikely either of them would have willfully chosen to pursue the other, had they met under different circumstances. They would likely never have opened or even tapped at the floodgates of their attraction, unless they had both gravitated towards this dark, abnormal part of life outside the realm of everyday lives, jobs, rational behavior, and decisions.

To me, this play was really about confronting that abnormal, primal, and sometimes unfathomable level of being that exists below the everyday. Pale has a memorable remark about all the little lies people live with and show to the world each day. Sometimes - when it is cut open and its value or sense thrown into question by some great tragedy such as a loss like this - you lose touch with that everyday life and the person you think you are within that everyday world. It becomes painfully juxtaposed and shrunk tiny, in the face of something all-encompassing and all-powerful, like grief. It becomes exposed as paper thin; Everything within it questionable and perhaps useless.

There is something of the profound in an emotion like grief. When it’s shared with someone, it’s no wonder that that also unlocks some profound connection. Anna and Pale don’t like each other as people, and they certainly take no enjoyment in the grief that brought them together. Yet, the relationship that blooms from it contains a compulsion and truth neither of them can deny. Even though they “don’t want this” (the rational, everyday side of their minds talking), they both admit they’ve never felt anything like it before, and they keep finding themselves drawn together. They don’t want to want each other - It’s painful and frightening for both of them, and yet their attraction wraps them both just as completely as their grief.

Anna’s boyfriend Burton is the epitome of the everyday. He earns a lot of money, he’s a well-dressed gentleman. He’s a writer, and fancies he can capture and portray the entire spectrum of human emotion. Even “great love,” as he fumblingly attempts to describe towards the play’s beginning. Yet all his talk is vapid and empty; As is his relationship with Anna. Theirs is one of the everyday, rational variety. It belongs with the small lies we live with and put on and speak and perform each day - To keep our lives square and tidy and comprehensible.

Then - There’s the chaotic, unpredictable, bordering violent being of Pale. He is every sincere, larger-than-life emotion and base instinct most people tamp down and deny voice to. He represents the terrible, uncontrollable, threatening Truth of everyday masks, dark desires, and empty identities of performativity.

Their attraction is not something Anna can bear to look in the face. She throws Pale out and ends the relationship because that deeper truth of true emotion unlocked by her grief cannot coexist with her reality. Her ability to continue dancing, to continue the everyday life she’s trying so hard to believe in and trust the purpose of - It cannot contain Pale. He represents and unlocks profound, unknown feeling that casts the waking world as a shadow.

And yet for all that discomfort, she has an artistic breakthrough after the affair with Pale. She is inspired to finally choreograph Robbie’s final send-off piece. And with Anna, Pale unlocked a part of himself that was calm, gentle, and soothed - A version of himself totally incongruous with his own reality and the identity he wears. Both of them are changed through their journey together through the Profound. It is a deeply uncomfortable, destabilizing place that neither of them wish to remain in. And yet its power is undeniable; Its impact unforgettable. The very experience of it is something they seek comfort for and can only find from each other.

Is it better to tell little lies each day so the world will make sense? So you can understand exactly who’s looking back at you in the mirror, and the quotidian will shade your perception of the invisible and unfathomable depths of human experience? So everything will remain neat and in control?

Or - Does it give meaning to abandon control? To surrender to grief and undesired passion, for the sake of a reality that is uncompromisingly, viscerally, heartbreakingly genuine? The harsh, infinite light all the rest of life seems to be constructed to blot from our eyes?

I really hope that as more people see the play, people will start posting their interpretations as well! I would love some good analysis dialogues! In the meantime, I will now slide right back into flaily, trash fangirl mode.... Thank you for reading all this, if you got this far! Go see this marvelous, haunting play if you’re able!!

All the love to my fangirl besties!!! @reylonly Thanks for making it an amazing night! :’)))

#Adam Driver #Burn This #Broadway #Keri Russell #driverdaily

70 notes · View notes

valkirsif · 5 years

Text

Follow you CH6/???

Painter Steve Roger x Natasha Romanof bailarina

Word 2500

Warning nothing

I hope enjoy @im-catbug many hug :)

Steve was constantly thinking back to the days just passed with Natasha as the plane prepared to take off, the little bubble of joy had vanished and now the woman was on a plane that would take her from the other end of the country while he was leaving to start the his studies at SDAI and did not know when they would meet again but tried not to think about it, at that moment he had to concentrate and think only of himself as it was difficult, he tied the woman's ribbon on his wrist like a bracelet and tried to relax his arrival would have to put the new apartment in order and check the schedule of the lessons, smiled to himself thinking that he would be a freshman ... one of the oldest, surrounded by boys and girls fresh out of graduation was the main reason why he had not chosen to living on campus but taking a house, chaos was not for him, not even as a boy did he love him, in high school he was secluded among the artists despite having a perfect body for r the sport, he ran only to relax but the best thing was the girls, everyone ran after the cheer leaders, as was obvious, but he had always loved busy girls, those with whom you could stay at the pub talking and laughing without 'anxious to have to be perfect or without having to endure the endless hours of shopping to find the perfect dress for shoes, in short he preferred the kind of girls who almost all snubbed .. those who did not hide to be intelligent, the thought immediately went to Tasha, she kept asking herself how an intelligent and wonderful woman like her could have chosen him, a recurring question even in high school, in those days the fascination of the artist was taking hold now that he was a man she didn't understand the mechanisms of love but she wasn't worried it was happy to be with Tasha, how he made him feel and laugh at eating popcorn in front of the TV, he didn't ask for much,

"Would you like something? Coffee, water, a sandwich ”the gentle voice of the hostess brought him back to reality,

"Thanks coffee," he replied with a smile, he would have landed soon, he saw the city from the window, he was excited for his new life and ready to get busy.

He looked at the time while he was waiting for his luggage, it was just after 3 pm, Tasha was still in the air

¥ You will be on the desert at this time, I have just landed call me when you arrive, I LOVE YOU ¥

retrieved his suitcases and took a bus to the center, he had an appointment with a certain Marc, an old friend of Sara's whom the woman had asked to looking for the apartment for him, he arrived downtown and looked for the bar where the man was waiting for him looking around, Sara had forgotten to send him a picture and didn't know how to recognize it,

"You must be Steve!" Said a cheerful voice from a table behind him, the man turned and smiled back,

"Marc, I assume," came over to shake his hand, "You were luckier than me, Sara sent you a picture," he laughed, settling himself,

"If you know Sara well, you know she didn't do it," she said calling the waitress, "Two coffees please" the girl wrote the order and disappeared at the counter, "I assumed you were, suitcases, backpack, you looked around ... typical appearance of the newly landed stranger "

"The classic out-of-home student" both laughed, drinking coffee

"Sara told me everything about you she wanted you to find the right home for her Brooklyn boy, she left off telling me you're gorgeous," he said flirtatiously,

"Thank you, you're not bad either," Steve replied, not feeling the least bit uncomfortable, "I can't wait to be home I'm exhausted"

"So let's go, I have the car out here," answered Marc, making his way, "It's a stone's throw from the campus, you walk 5 minutes through the park, I hope it's your taste," the man said, "I prepared you a map with the most useful things in the area, shops, restaurants and various places in case you want to go out every so often "

"Thank you very much, can I bother you in case of need?" Steve asked, "I was so used to having Sara always with me that it's strange to be alone"

"No problem, I promised Sara to take care of you .. I always keep my promises" he smiled giving him a friendly pat on the shoulder, they arrived in the campus area in less than half an hour, he felt the atmosphere of the artists, groups of students strolling in the park, Marc parked in front of a blue house.

"Welcome to San Diego," he said, giving him the keys, "Come in and tell me what you think while I unload the luggage," Steve walked up the driveway and opened the door, he really liked the outside, old style repainted with bright colors like the others in area, he immediately found the living room to welcome him, the red bricks had been exposed, an old leather sofa with two armchairs occupied the corner in front of the TV, the open kitchen was separated from the living room with an arch that also served as a bench for lunch, a short corridor led to the bedroom, Steve hoped to have a room just to work but he would have divided the bedroom with a curtain in case, and from the outside it seemed that the house had two floors, he went back to the room where Marc waited leaning against the wall

"Is it your taste?" He asked cheerfully

"It's a perfect friend you made a great choice," he replied, throwing his backpack on the sofa, he didn't want to be rude by telling him about the extra room he wanted, on the campus there were classrooms to paint in solitude,

"Mmm yet Sara had told me that you were looking for something with at least two rooms to get you a studio"

"In fact I would have liked to have a studio, but it's not a problem," he replied awkwardly, "Do me a favor by leaning against the wall with me," Marc said, looking at him puzzled, not understanding the request, the man nodded to him approaching, once leaning he felt a click and moved between the curious and the undecided looking at Marc who was laughing,

"I thought a secret study was better," he said mysteriously, he pushed "the wall" that opened showing a flight of stairs leading to the upper floor,

"Cabbage the wall is a door ?!" said Steve amazed, "It's a brilliant idea !!" he laughed as he looked at Marc,

"When I visited the house and they showed me the door I thought it was the right one for you," said the man,

"Friend is all perfect now, if Tasha were here I would be in heaven" he concluded with a veil of sadness in his voice,

"Follow me, I'll show you the second floor," he said, going up the stairs, followed by Steve, the upper floor was large and bright, the walls had been removed to create a room full of light with the bathroom attached, the wooden floor was covered with carpets colored and some boxes were leaning against the wall, it would have become a beautiful studio once the furniture arrived,

"What do you say is big enough to work?" Marc asked, looking at the happy face of the man, "In the boxes there are spare tiles, you can put them in the garage since you don't have a car"

"Marc now that everything is perfect, if I didn't think badly I would kiss you" he answered laughing,

"I'm afraid my husband and your girlfriend would have something to say, a hug is more appropriate" laughed Marc in turn, "When do your things arrive?"

"The movers will be here in a couple of days, I will have plenty of time to settle down before classes begin"

"In that case, relax and take a walk, tomorrow night you are my guest at dinner," he said giving him a pat on the back, "Now I get back to the center, the work calls" the two shook hands, Steve accompanied the new friend to the door

"See you tomorrow and thank you for everything, Marc," he greeted

"Brooklyn boy tomorrow" the man laughed as he left. Steve went into the room and unpacked, found a box with a ticket on the bottom of the suitcase

¥ Good start lessons my love T. ¥

opened the excited package inside there was a set of colored charcoal of his favorite brand, he smiled at that special gift, he was really a lucky man who found Tasha, closed the box and put it on the table, took out the folder with the documents and went out to go to register in the faculty, Marc was right passing through the park took a few minutes to arrive, he crossed some students and stopped to look at a drawing group that was portraying a girl posing on the tree, that was the his place was increasingly convinced, he smiled as he entered the campus garden.

Looked around was exactly as he remembered it, at least 3 years had passed since his first visit to apply for enrollment but in those days he didn't have the credentials to access, he had worked hard, committing himself to the maximum and finally he had managed to enter, he followed the signs. for the secretariat, hoping it was still open, it was almost 6 pm maybe it was late,

"Excuse me," he said, stopping a woman in the corridor, "Is the office still open?", The woman looked at him with a smile

"Of course, students are constantly coming in and open until late," he replied, "But the new teachers have to report to the rector not in the office," Steve laughed, he expected something similar,

"Er thank you but I'm a new student," he said awkwardly, even the woman laughed

"I'm sorry I'm used to dealing with 18/20 years old kids, so I'll see you in class on Monday, Mr.?"

"Rogers, Steve Rogers," he said, shaking her hand,

"Nice to meet you, Anna Smith, you can call me Anna like all my students", the woman walked away and Steve walked down the corridor to the student office, knocked and a secretary came in, greeted him smiling,

"Good afternoon, can I help you?" she asked, making him sit down,

"I should complete the registration, I have the documents here," he replied, sitting down and handing her the folder with the documentation,

"Let's see .." said checking and entering the data of the man in the system, "... it's all right, these are the times of the lessons and those of the teachers, a map of the campus .." she handed him the sheets, ".. do you already have accommodation? ” asked, taking other sheets from the file,

"Yes I took a house just outside the complex," he replied

"Very good then the poster with the ads you do not need, well come to the SDAI Steve" smiled dismissing him

"Thanks," he answered as left, opened the map and studied it so as not to get lost on the first day, took a walk in the large campus park to get some reference points, he was studying a mural when he heard the phone vibrate.

"Hello my beautiful princess" he said lovingly answering Tasha, "How was the flight?"

"My love we just landed, the journey went well I'm very tired" said the woman, "Did you settle down?"

"Yes, I just completed the registration, I was walking around the campus" he replied, sitting down in the tree, "I wish you could see the house, it's near the park and full of light you'd like"

"I will give it a little thought of love," the woman replied laughing, "Take my own please," he said to someone

"Do you have to look for your luggage? I let you do your things ... do we feel when you're at the hotel? "Steve said, hearing the voices of the woman's colleagues,

"I figured I was just giving the coupon to Jessy so he recovers everything, I think I'll collapse in bed as soon as he arrived at the hotel" he laughed, "Flying makes me anxious I wasn't able to rest .. I kept thinking of you",

"Princess wanted to thank you for the gift, I will think of you every time I use them .. however there is something for you in the suitcase .." Steve said mysteriously,

"Then I will have to unpack as soon as I arrive!" She said curiously, "The bus has arrived, we feel later my sexy painter .. I love you"

"... I love you princess afterwards" he replied, attacking, stood looking at the sky through the leaves enjoying the cool of the evening before returning home, getting into the studio and starting to make it usable, he didn't think about tidying the new house but he concentrated only on the upper floor his art came first of all .. not before Tasha laughed to himself, now she was his center, he made some trips to bring the spare tiles into the garage, he did not remove those chipped or broken ones, observing them he thought of a project for one of the walls of the studio, in the garage he found an old table covered with objects he cleaned it, he untied the drawers stuck by the long inactivity and put it in a corner of the studio, it was perfect to keep brushes and colors, he would wanted to bring up one of the armchairs upstairs but realized that it was too heavy for him, he promised himself to ask Marc for help the next day, it was almost night when he looked around, in the study lacking only his stool and the raised base he used for portraits, they would arrive in the following days along with the rest, fortunately the house was furnished had left all his furniture in the old house, he had taken only his study, his clothes and objects from which he would not have separated for anything in the world, photos of his family, a colorful sculpture given to him by Sara that everyone found horrible but that he loved, the wind chimes of shells he had made with his grandchildren, all his memories more expensive, the day had been long and tiring and he was hungry but the fridge was deserted, "Thanks Marc" said between himself opening the envelope that the man had left him, inside there were a series of numbers for home deliveries , he scanned the list and decided for Chinese dinner, he called, ordered, had plenty of time to take a shower and change before dinner arrived, the first day in San Diego had been exciting and tiring at the same time or, he hung the wind chimes on the porch and sat on the veranda with the meal, he lacked Tasha but felt happy, that was his dream and decided to live it to the full.

2 notes · View notes

robot-unicorn-attack · 5 years

Text

❂ RACERS

Ice World (𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙)

Snow (31, FC: Anna Selezneva) is unicorn racing’s resident Ice Queen. But she was once, surprising as it may seem, Ice World’s sweetheart. She was scouted when she was 17, and given the name of “Snow Princess”. With her blonde curls and blue eyes, she had a smile so pretty and sweet that people said it could melt ice. And her first unicorn was the same-gentle, with an even disposition and as pretty as a picture. But that all changed when an armed thief tried to rob Snow on her way back from practice with her unicorn. That first unicorn, the one who was pretty and sweet and gentle, saw Snow panicking and attacked the thief, killing him. In order to avoid legal sanctions, 𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 was forced to deactivate (more like put down, in Snow’s opinion) the unicorn, and Snow Princess disappeared from the racing scene. She re-appeared with Sparkle Charmer three seasons later, but she was different. Cold. She dropped the ‘princess’ from her name, becoming just Snow, and would go on to become an industry veteran. She’s now over 30, but shows no signs of retiring....and she’s perfectly capable of competing with the newer, younger racers, thank you very much. (Alicia / @ayzrules)

Sky (23, FC: Luiza Scandelari) is the newest and the youngest of 𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙‘s current 3-racer team. With Celestial Resonator, a unicorn made with the most cutting-edge technology that looks like they have shifting galaxies inside them, Sky is (according to her agency) breaching the ‘new frontier’ of unicorn racing. And with her dramatic backstory and enigmatic tattoos, it’s not hard to see why. 𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 crafted an image of a mysterious and otherworldly beauty who burst onto the racing scene seemingly overnight. Although none of her alleged backstory is in any way real, her ethereal looks have more than done its part to attract public attention. That, combined with her skill (not to mention her very Ice World-esque ambition), have all but guaranteed her a spot at the top, sooner or later. (Nikki / @jay-swagsby)

Ice (27, FC: Soo Joo Park) is the brash, hotheaded counterpart to Snow’s icy persona. Whereas Snow is cold, Ice is straight-up intimidating...and her unicorn, Wrath Mare, only adds to that image. Blunt, curt, and straightforward, Ice has an air of exoticism (probably from the fact that she was born on Ice World but grew up in a different galaxy, giving her a distinctive accent) that 𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 has eagerly capitalized on. Unicorn City’s biggest tabloids have described her style as ‘biker chick glam’; Ice is all leather jackets and sharp suits and motorcycles with flames painted onto the sides. She’s brazen and a bit ruthless, both on and off the race track, and does not take any bullshit. 𝕿𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 definitely likes to hype up a sort of “rivalry” in between Ice and Snow (#TeamSnow and #TeamIce, amirite?), which both racers think is totally stupid but go along with for the sake of keeping their positions within the agency. Ice, at least, likes to have a bit of fun with their alleged rivalry. (open)

Sky World (𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸)

Supernova (40, FC: Natalie Portman) is widely considered to be the Cindy Crawford or Naomi Campbell of unicorn racing. Supernova was scouted when 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 was putting together its very first team of racers after one of the agents saw her at a robot horse show-jumping competition. And so at the age of 16, Supernova became one of the very first unicorn racers in the entire galaxy. Thanks to her background in show-jumping, she would go on to become one of the most successful-and most iconic-racers ever, and is widely regarded as one of the girls who made the sport what it is today. But all things must come to an end, and Supernova’s career lasted until she was about 30, when she decided to put her personal life first. She retired to focus on her wife and their young family, and was pretty much off the radar for 10 years. Recently, however, Supernova has decided to make a comeback, after a messy divorce ended with her wife getting custody of their kids. 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 was all too happy to have her back, and they even let her keep the unicorn she’d raced on all those years ago-Robot Unicorn MK II. And make no mistake about it-the word ‘rusty’ isn’t in Supernova’s vocabulary ...but ‘overwhelmed’ certainly is. The robot unicorn industry has changed dramatically since Supernova was active, and she’s starting to think that all this media stuff is a bit...much. (Semp / @interluxetumbra)

Sunbeam (28, FC: Blanca Padilla) is one of the most beloved racers on the entire planet-honest, loyal, calm and collected, with a firm belief in doing the right thing and an unbeatable technique on the race track to boot, she is the epitome of everything Sky World. 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 dresses her in classical Sky World fashions, going light on the makeup so as to emphasize her classical sort of beauty. And although Sunbeam is no super genius prodigy of a racer, she’s hardworking and consistent as hell. There hasn’t been anyone on all of Sky World who could match her precision and technique since the original three 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 racers retired, and Sky Worlders know it. Sunbeam and her unicorn, UV N-7, are on their way to becoming industry icons. At this point, it’s not so much a matter of if as it is a matter of when. (buffy / @shiftyprincess)

Flower (25, FC: Ming Xi) is 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 ’s newest addition. Originally from a little-known moon in the middle of nowhere, Flower was scouted solely based on her doll-like looks during a visit to Unicorn City. And although she was only 16 at the time (and had never touched a robot horse or unicorn in her life!), she jumped at the chance to earn money and provide for her family. Her first race was, as expected, not super great, but Flower refused to quit. 𝑅 𝐼 𝒮 𝐸 pulled her out of the public eye for a while so that she could have time to train with Pageant Princess while they cultivated an image for her to grow her fan-base. And so, after all those long years, Flower is finally back. The public knows her as the Long-Legged Bimbo to Supernova’s polished Heroine and Sunbeam’s beloved Sky-Daughter personas, and though having to pretend to be someone she’s not all the time has taken its toll on Flower, she’s determined to win and to finally cement herself as a serious racer. (Fanfan / @bebemoon)

Lava World (ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ)

Flame (22, FC: Rasika Navare) is Lava World’s resident firecracker. Blunt, vulgar, a bit crude, and more than just a little bit sarcastic, Flame’s fierce, tough-girl demeanor may have gotten her into trouble on Planet Hughes, where she grew up, but it has also made her into one of Lava World’s favorite racers. Flame is a new face, but people already adore her pure badassery and ‘no fucks given’ attitude. Flame is flashy and headstrong and will 100% fight you for the tiniest of slights...and Lava World is eating it up. Her unicorn, Iron Pegasus, is just as fiery as Flame is, and although her rash recklessness gives ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ one hell of a headache, she’s good enough at racing that they won’t drop her. Flame is the type of girl who curses too much and drinks too much and gets into bar fights and likes blowing things up, and you can bet that Lava Worlders fucking love it. (Destiny / @filthysoulls)

Nyx (24, FC: Duckie Thot) signed her contract at 18, and has been with ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ ever since. Nyx’s ruthlessness is not unknown; in fact, it’s what made her popular in the first place-ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ has never tried to hide the fact that Nyx will do anything she has to in order to get what she wants. Nyx’s image and her skill with her robot unicorn, U-800, have brought her moderate success. Recently, however, especially with the addition of Flame to the team, Nyx has been worried that her popularity is declining. She’s good, but she’s no Snow or Supernova. Of course, Nyx doesn’t take no for an answer, so she’s going to do whatever it takes to get to the top. Even if it means exacerbating all the rumors of foul play that already surround her. (Tol / @kzombi3)

Widowmaker (26, FC: Binx Walton) is different from every other racer with any racing agency in the fact that she actually owns her robot unicorn. She grew up in the sketchier parts of Lava World, becoming a rogue thief to survive, and when she was 15, she successfully stole Void Maker. Widowmaker has been continuously making improvements on her unicorn ever since, and she’s discovered that she’s a pretty great mechanic, all things considered. Widowmaker was scouted when a recruiter for ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ caught her stealing robot unicorn parts from one of the production centers. They were so impressed with her skill with Void Maker that they offered to sign her on, right then and there. Considering that the alternative was going to jail, Widowmaker accepted. She refused to sign over the rights to Void Maker, though she was happy to let the agency polish the unicorn up a bit. She also refuses to let her agency oversexualize her, something that has actually panned out in ʟᴀᴢᴇʀ ‘s favor, as Lava Worlders are loving the badass vibe. Widowmaker wears severe black leather and never has any make-up on that isn’t black; she’s the dark, severe counterpart to Flame’s flashy, fiery persona...and she is on her way to becoming one of Lava World’s lasting favorites. (Elissa / @now-on-elissastillstands)

#about #racers #cs

3 notes · View notes

paranymf · 5 years

Photo

No clue how to introduce her, because she has got to be one of the most hyped Disney Characters to date. But if you’re still wondering: yes, this is my cosplay of Elsa, Queen of Arendelle. I currently have the Wreck-It Ralph casual outfit (as seen above) and my unfinished version of Olaf’s Frozen Adventure (next picture after the gif). I currently working on her Frozen Fever dress (it has to be finished in two weeks, help me). In case you still don’t who I am talking about:

This is something stupid, but I have the urge to dislike everything that is overhyped. So as I thought the movie was a beautiful Disney film that did not have the basic trope with “Love is the most important need in the world” written into a male to female relationship but through the love of family, I was not that eager on cosplaying anyone from this franchise. But then. They had to make short. About Christmas. And include the most beau-ti-ful gown. FOR ELSA. After that I started to analyse Elsa’s character and recognize so much of myself in her. And ofcourse one of my best friends agreed to be my Anna and we had a cute duo cosplay:

My cosplans have increased since I started appreciating Elsa more and right now the only outfit that I never see myself cosplaying, is the Ice Dress (the light blue one in Frozen). I just don’t like that light colour blue and it’s the whole dress. However, the coronation costume were already on my cosplan-list (although I would love to make the Broadway Musical version of that dress, not the film version), my cosplayheart skipped a beat when I saw the pantsuit + coat combination for the first time and that purple gown that was teased was immediately added to my cosplan list. There are still some other versions I would love to cosplay, but those are mostly fanart or my own twists and I don’t know when I will start that and what exactly I will do.

Elsa is not only a cosplay for me, but also a character I use as an entertainer. Especially when I team up with Anna, they get so much lovely reactions. When we were at the winter edition of DCC (Dutch Comic Con) last fall, there was another event at the bussiness centre, just for kids. We were shooting pictures outside, just in sight for everyone who came from the parking lot to enter the building. “MOM, IT’S ELSA!” “It’s Anna and Elsa!” “DADDADDADDAD, DO YOU SEE HER? THAT’S ANNA!” They are also too sweet when they want to take a picture with you. Sometimes they are too intimidated to actually stand beside you, but the interaction on itself it just beautiful and so pure. Teenagers and adults at cons are just the best on conventions when you’re cosplaying as Anna and Elsa. We actually got serenaded with “Let It Go” by a group of teenagers one time and it was amazing and hilarious, haha. Fun fact: the first name of the “Anna” in the duo pictures is actually Anna! So when we cosplay as Anna and Elsa, only one of us has to listen to two names, haha.

I am still very hyped to finish my Olaf’s Frozen Adventure dress (especially the cape, I have beautiful ideas for that piece) and hopefully I have something to wear in two weeks for the event, haha. That reminds me, there is this ungoing joke going between me and Anna (as in: the Anna in the pictures), how we hate on me (Elsa) for adding so much details, rhinestones and pieces to the costumes with my ice powers. Mostly I talk about myself in third person (”Elsa, THERE IS NO NEED FOR MORE SPARK-oh you already added another thousand rhinestones. Thanks…”). After we’re done ranting, we always say that the time and effort are seriously worth it, because the result are just so beautiful. Also: Elsa’s hair is… something else, I guess? Of all the times I styled my wig, the last time was the best. I am not overly fond of the hairstyling in the next picture, but I love the pose.

This message was edited in May 2020 because it contained pictures from a photographer who persuaded adults and minors against their will into (partial) nudity and/or sexy shoots. Luckily I wasn’t persuaded in those kind of shoots, but I will never ever promote any content of him again on any form of social media.

The Anna cosplayer in pictures 2 & 4 is Thorns Productions

Pictures taken by:

1 & 3. Ton Peterboers at Elfia Haarzuilens 2019 (1) & Disney Picknick Fall Edition 2018 (3) 2 & 5. Philip Paleewong Fotografie at Dutch Comic Con Winter Edition 2018 4. John van Oers Fotografie at Disney Picknick Fall Edition 2018

You can follow me on Facebook or Instagram for more cosplay!

#cosplay #cosplayer #female cosplayer #sapientia cosplay #introduction to sapientia cosplay #elsa #elsa cosplay #elsa of arendelle #queen elsa #frozen #frozen cosplay #olaf's frozen adventure #anna and elsa #anna and elsa cosplay #wreck-it ralph #disney #disney cosplay

2 notes · View notes

all-the-love-harold · 6 years

Text

The Daily Anna - Chapter 1

So the link broke and I don’t know how to fix it so I’m just posting this again. I hope you enjoy it, please let me know what you thought, feedback really helps xxx

Master Post

The Daily Anna.

11th April 2018.

Hiya!

In the last few days a lot of new faces have joined us on here and I thought I’d take the time to introduce myself to them, so if you’ve been here for a while, come back tomorrow for some new content (or stay and read this anyway, up to you) and if you’re new here, welcome!

Incase you haven’t already guessed, my name is Anna and I post on this blog daily, I don’t know what it is that’s drawn you to this little corner of the internet, but I hope you find it a warm, welcoming place for you to escape the harsh realities of the outside world. There isn’t really any theme to this blog, It’s just a record of my life, which I assure you is nothing special.

I’m a 24 year old, originally from Manchester, but loving every minute of living in London. This blog is my not-so-secret diary, where I share all of my thoughts and feelings about whatever is going on in my life, and some days the posts can be incredibly deep and self reflexive, others they’re about stupid things like that cat I saw on the the walk from my flat to my best friends, one day I might even post my super secret brownie recipe (although I doubt I’ll ever do that because brownies are the only way I know how to make friends and if I share that recipe on the internet then I’ll be friendless again, so if that ever happens call 999 because there is definitely and emergency). You’ll also get a lot of content that relates to music, I have always been a music fan, so expect song recs and playlists as well as concert reviews and minor (Major) fangirl moments.

I’m not going to pretend that I have a lot of advice to offer you, but I hope that by sharing my experiences and the little hacks that I’ve learnt along the way that we can all learn a little from each other.

Before I sign off, I’d just like to add that this blog is a Safe Space, for me and for everyone that reads it, so if you have any nasty comments, please keep them to yourselves, that kind of negativity is not welcome here.

That’s about all I have to say for now, you’ll learn more about me along the way and I hope to get to know you a little bit about you too. I always read the comments on my posts, so please feel free to introduce yourself under this one, and I’ll get around to replying to as many as possible as soon as I can.

Yours sincerely, Anna. xx

***

Anna’s life was a mess. An absolute mess. Sure, her blog made it like look like she had everything together, but in reality, she felt like everything was falling apart.

It had all started a couple of weeks ago when her friend, Charlotte, who truly was one of her best friends, asked her how she felt about giving up her job and her degree to start blogging full time. It was a big decision that she couldn’t take lightly, she hated her job, but the money was good and what kind of loser didn’t have a degree these days? She was 24, she should have graduated years ago, but she’d taken time off and changed university’s and what should have taken her 3 years had so far taken her 6 and she still had one one to go. But what charli was offering was a light at the end of the tunnel, with a job that would be on her own terms, and money that she could live on comfortably. The only thing that was stopping her was what her family and friends would think of her if she dropped out but right now as she sat at her desk, fingertips pressed to her temples trying to write this goddamn essay about infant attachment she couldn’t think of a reason not to drop out. Why waste another year of her life? Why spend time on things she doesn’t care about?

The buzzing of her phone brought her out of her trance and Anna glanced over at her screen to see a message from Ronnie.

Gig at the O2, you’re coming. You’ll thank me later x

Ronnie was Anna’s best friend, he had been since they were 2, and he was also a well known photographer on the music scene in London and always managed to get tickets to sold out gigs.

Are you working? Who are we seeing?

Anna put her pen down and closed her laptop. She was done. For tonight at least, she would think about her future tomorrow, for now she needed to find something to wear.

Now that would ruin the surprise wouldn’t it? Working for the O2 not the artist.

You’re so Cryptic. What should I wear?

You’re best clothes ;)

You’re the worst

I know. I’ll pick you up at 5, we’re going backstage xx

It wasn’t often that Ronnie got to take someone backstage with him, most of the time he was too busy to have a tag-along, but he did always manage to at least get Anna tickets to most shows he worked.

***

It was five to five and Anna was putting the final touches on her make up, making sure her eyeliner wings were even and her brows were looking as good as they could when they hadn’t been waxed in a few weeks. As she stepped back from the mirror she heard a knock on her door, followed by the sound of Ronnie’s footsteps walking toward her bathroom.

“Hurry it up” he called “I can’t be late today An, this is a big show”

“Who are we seeing Ron?” she asked quizzically, putting her earrings in and having one last check of herself in the mirror. Ronnie rounded the corner and handed her an O2 pass and an old camera of his.

“This doesn’t answer my question” she looked at the camera that now in her hand

“Tonight” he smirked “You are my intern”

You put the camera strap around your neck and and smiled at him “Do I look like a photographer?”

“Prettiest photographer I’ve ever seen” he winked and smiled at her placing a playful kiss on her hand “but we do need to go, get your things I’ll tell you everything in the car”

Anna rolled her eyes and pushed passed Ronnie so that she cold grab her bag from her room.

Ronnie remained silent the whole way to the car, and Anna was growing more and more anxious to know who they were going to see. The evening air hit their faces as they walked out of the building and towards his car, still without a word escaping his lips.

Anna slammed the car door closed and she couldn't hold it in any longer. “Alright knob head, who are we seeing and why are you being so secretive?”

He turned on the ignition, clipped his seat belt in and turned to look at Anna “You remember that time last year when you called me crying hysterically because you couldn’t get concert tickets?”

Anna’s eyes widened as she realised who Ronnie was taking her to see “No, Ron” she sighed “you didn’t?

He reached down into the side pocket in the drivers door and pulled out an envelope and he handed it to Anna. “You know I did”

She grabbed the envelope from him and frantically opened it, revealing two tickets and two shimmering backstage passes, each with the words “Treat People with Kindness” overlaying an image of Harry Styles.

“Holy fuck Ronnie” Anna yelled “how did you manage this?”

“I know a guy” he winked and looked at the road ahead of him as he turned the stereo on to Harry’s album.

“Oh you know a guy” Anna laughed and started singing along to the music.

“But you have to pretend you’re my intern because I could only get us tickets if we were both working”

“Are you going to pay me?”

“Absolutely not” he laughed “You can’t take photos to save your life”

“I could if you taught me how” she pouted

“I’m going to have to pretend to for tonight, so you might just learn something”

***

It was just past 5pm and the traffic around the O2 was getting busier by the second. Ronnie was getting stressed that he’d be late, but he pulled the car up in the staff car park just as it passed 5:10. Anna was still struggling to believe that this was happening but she put the pass around her neck and stepped out of the car, still holding onto ronnie’s old camera.

“What do you expect me to do with an old camera that doesn’t work Ron?”

“Pretend to take photos” he shrugged as he pulled his kit out of the boot and handed Anna a tripod that kept falling from the bag. “Just don’t freak when you see Harry”

She cleared her throat and tossed her hair her back “I am a professional photographer, I would never freak out in the presence of a client”

He laughed and started walking towards the back entrance to the building “Keep repeating that in your head and you might start to believe it”

Anna followed closely behind Ronnie as they made their way into the building. They walked into chaos. There were crew members everywhere, running about trying to get things organised for the show. Ronnie was used to this, he’d worked for the O2 on and off for about 3 years now and he’d seen his fair share of high profile shows, but this was the first time Anna had been to this venue with him and she was a little shocked to see how frantic everything was.

“This way An” Ronnie said directing her down a hallway towards a door that said ‘STAFF ONLY’

The room was tiny. Not nearly big enough to fit more than five people, and it was crammed with bags and jackets.

“Does everyone out there count as staff?” Anna asked

“No, they’re crew, they have their own room” he dumped his kit in the free space on the table “This is the backstage staffroom for O2 staff, there’s another one for front stage staff that’s much bigger”

“But you’re not cool enough for that are you?” she giggled as another girl walked into the room.

“Hey Bridge” Ronnie smiled “This is Anna, my new intern”

Anna held her hand out and shook the girls hand “It’s lovely to meet you”

“You too love” she smiled “It’s Bridgett by the way, I’m the creative director for The O2, I tell Ronnie what to do”

“Someone’s got to” she laughed, suddenly feeling nervous about this whole thing. Bridgett smiled back and then turned to Ronnie

“Harry will be arriving soon, and when he gets here I need you to introduce yourselves and tell him what you’ll be doing tonight.”

“And what exactly are we doing tonight?” Ronnie said, so he knew exactly what shots he needed

“Right” Bridgett pulled out her notes from her back pocket “We need the standard Hall of Fame shot once he’s all dressed, he has his own photographer who I will introduce you to in a minute, that will take care of most of the backstage shots, but get a few if you can. Your main focus tonight though is the fans, get outside once doors have opened at get some photos of them all coming in.”

Ronnie was writing everything down frantically so that he didn’t miss anything “and when he’s on stage, focus on him or the crowd?”

“Both, get some shots of him that will look nice on the website, and get some of the crowd that can be used for marketing the venue to potential artists”

“Great “ Ronnie putting his pen away “and when do you need the final product by?”

“You’ve got until monday to get me the photos from tonight and tomorrow” Bridgett was called out of the room by another member of staff and she turned and walked away.

Anna looked at Ronnie quizzically, “Tomorrow night?”

“Oh yeah” Ronnie laughed “did I forget to tell you that we get to do this all again tomorrow?”

“You did.” Anna said bluntly

“Surprise!” Ronnie held up his hands and waved them “But seriously, we need to go outside and get photos of the queue.” He walked out of the room, holding the door open for Anna. The backstage area was still in chaos and Anna began to feel nervous again. She felt strange pretending to be Ronnie’s intern, as greatful as she was to be there, she felt a bit like a fraud. She shook it off and followed Ronnie, weaving in and out of crew members watching as he got a few shots of them getting things ready for the show.

After getting a few images of fans waiting to get into the venue, Anna and Ronnie returned backstage, where she helped him to find a free wall space for the hall of fame image to be set up and then left him to it for a few minutes while she went and got some more equiptment for him. She walked out of the staff room again and the room that had five minutes ago been filled with chaos was suddenly calm and she saw Harry standing off to the side, talking to who she assumed was his manager. Nerves filled her body again as she made her way towards Ronnie who was standing almost right next to Harry. She handed ronnie the tripod that he has asked her to get but she couldn’t take her eyes off the tall smiley boy in front of her and dropped it before Ronnie had a hold of it. His head turned towards them in that moment when he heard the tripod drop and his smile grew wider as he tried to hold back a laugh

“Careful love” he said his voice deeper than Anna had expected

She blushed and smiled at him.

“I don’t believe we’ve met before” held his hand out to shake Anna’s “I’m Harry” he said as if he thought she didn’t know who he was

“Anna” she said shaking his hand “Ronnie’s intern”

“Well he’s a lucky man to get to work with you every day”

She blushed “I think I’m the lucky one if I’m honest”

Harry shrugged “I’ll be the judge of that” he winked

Ronnie stepped in between the two of them “I don’t mean to interrupt, but Harry I need to get a few shots”

“Lead the way” Harry said ushering Ronnie in front of him and hanging back so that he was walking beside Anna

“You know” he said quietly “I’m pretty sure Ronnie Dalton doesn’t have an intern”

“He doesn’t” Anna’s whispered “this camera’s fake, he’s my best friend has been since we were little”

“And he got you backstage” Harry nodded a smile spread across his face.

“Sorry”

“Don’t be” he held his hands up in surrender “I’m glad you’re here”

They came to the space that Ronnie and Anna had set up earlier and Ronnie asked Harry to pose for the camera. The shots only took a few minutes but by the time they were done Harry’s manager was calling for him to do the soundcheck. He thanked ronnie and Anna before he ran off but just before he reached the stage doors, he turned on his heels and Looked at Anna.

“Do you want to watch?” he started jogging back towards her

“Uhhh” Anna looked nervously at Ronnie and back to Harry “The soundcheck?”

“Yeah” He ran his fingers through his hair “I hate doing them, it’s weird looking out to an empty room”

“I don’t think one person is going to make a difference” Ronnie said rolling his eyes

Harry turned his head to look at Ronnie “You can come too, I’m sure Helene wouldn’t mind if you got a few photos”

“My focus is the fans”

“Okayyy” Harry turned back to Anna “coming or not?”

She looked to Ronnie who shrugged and nodded “You’re not really my intern, do what you want”

His sudden change in attitude worried Anna, but she knew it was probably nothing, he often got stressed in high pressure situations where he had a set number of specific images that he needed.

Anna nodded at Harry “I guess I am”

Harry held out his hand and she took hold of it, “We better be quick, Jeffery will kill me if I take much longer.” He started running back down the narrow hallway and Anna was forced to follow suit, breaking into a light jog so that she wouldn’t have to let go of his hand. They came to the stage and Harry burst through the door and was met by a very stern looking Jeffery.

He quickly dropped Anna’s hand “Hello Jeffery” he said excitedly, a tone of sarcasm evident in his voice “what’s the plan here?”

“Same as always H, nice of you to keep everyone waiting”

Harry laughed and pet jeffery on the back “It’s only a few minutes Jeffy, I think we’ll be fine”

Jeffery peered around Harry so that he could see Anna and drew his lips into a sharp line, looking back at Harry with an expression that said a thousand words.

“Go stand at the mic, we’ll start by checking the screens”

Harry nodded and turned around looking at Anna “Where do you want to watch from love? Front and centre?” he pointed towards the gap between the two mosh pits.

“Where else?” she laughed and walked down the steps leaning on the barrier as she watched the screens lower around the stage. Harry waved to her as he disappeared behind them and Anna giggled at his attempts to be in sight as long as possible, ducking his head and pulling faces until the screens covered the stage. The opening notes of Only Angel echoed through the empty arena and Anna smiled back at Harry as he reappeared in front of her.

The soundcheck was quicker than Anna had expected, Harry and the band ran through a few songs on the main stage to check that everything was working as it should be. Then, once they knew everything on the B-Stage was working as it should be, Harry ran off stage back to Anna.

“Good show?” he asked raising his eyebrows at her

“My own private screening, might as well go home now”

“Oh no” Harry said “You’ll miss all the best bits”

***

The arena was full of screaming fans now and the show was halfway over. Standing by the B-Stage as Harry sang the final notes of ‘If I could Fly’, Anna was helping Ronnie find some fans that he could get a photo of and all she could think about was not the beautiful boy standing just a few metres away from her, who only an hour ago had been flirting with her, or her best friend who was truly the most important person in her life, but her blog. This was the moment of clarity that she’d been waiting for for years, the moment where she realised that her own happiness is more important than any degree in the world and her blog was her happy place, so why not make it her job too. She watched as Harry carefully rested his guitar on the stand and waved to the fans at the back of the arena before he made his way back to the main stage at a steady jog.

He brushed past Anna and grabbed onto her hand “You’re going to want to be at the front for this next song love” he dropped her hand continued on his way.

Ronnie rolled his eyes at the interaction “you’re not falling for this are you An?” he put his camera down and looked at her sternly.

“Mind your business Ronald” she wrapped her fake camera around her neck and followed Harry down the aisle, stopping just to the side of the pit.

“This is another new one” Harry said into the mic as the drum beat of an unfamiliar song echoed in Anna’s ears “It’s called Anna” he winked at Anna, a wide smirk emerging on his face.

“Don’t know where you’re laying Just know it’s not with me Don’t know what I’d tell you if I passed you on the street

I don’t want your sympathy, but you don’t know what you do to me,

Oh Anna!”

Anna Blushed. She knew the song wasn't about her, how could it be? She’d only met Harry four hours ago. It was simply coincidental, but she couldn’t help but feel like he was singing directly to her. Maybe it was because he couldn’t take his eyes off her, maybe it was because everytime he said her name he winked or maybe it was just because the song was about a girl called Anna.

“Well I guess it would be nice if I could touch your body

If I could touch your body

If I could touch your body”

Harry couldn’t take his eyes off Anna and he couldn’t wipe the grin off his face as he watched her blush at the lyrics. It had been a long time since he’d met someone he connected with so instantly, he actually wasn't sure he ever had.

***

Happiness.

In the perfect world, with the perfect life, there’s a formula for happiness, it’s a simple one, good grades in school, a university degree, a good, high paying job, a partner that loves you and some kids that are happy and healthy. But real life doesn’t have a formula and happiness is different for everyone.

I’m finding myself stuck on the second point of the so- called formula. University. A degree is supposed to qualify you for a job, right? But with just a few subjects to complete before I graduate, I don’t feel like there’s a job out there that I’m qualified to do. So why finish? That sounds crazy I know, but I’m, at a crossroads here, I have a choice.

I could spend the next year and a bit finishing my degree, getting myself into more debt only to end up in the same place I would if I take option two now.

I could turn this blog into my career. This requires a big leap of faith, a lot of patience and hard work, but that’s not what I’m afraid of. It’s the judgement that scares me. From family and friends to some of you guys, I know a lot of people would disapprove of me leaving university.

Now, before I tell you about my final decision, I’d like to tell you about last night because it was the happiest I’ve ever felt and it’s that experience that has led me to this cross roads.

Mr Harry Styles, has always been one of my favourite celebrities, he’s kind and he radiates joy and last night I got to experience that live and up close. Most of you know that a very close friend of mine is Ronnie Dalton, a well known photographer around London and he was lucky enough to be asked by the O2 to help out with photography last night, which meant that I got to tag along (as Ronnie’s “Intern”)

My interactions with Harry were only brief, a quick introduction, a hug, a few photos taken by Ronnie of Harry posing against a wall and then he was dragged away for sound check, but spending those few minutes with him, and watching him perform live, made me realise that there is no formula for happiness, something that makes one person happy won’t have the same effect on the next.

I was standing at the edge of Harry’s B-Stage, helping Ronnie set up a shot, when it dawned on me that my life doesn’t need to fit into a formula, I can be who I want without the world’s approval. So I write this blog post as I delete the essay I began writing yesterday and withdraw from my current subjects. I don’t need that degree to be happy, this blog has always been one of my great passions, I’ve been posting on it daily for years without fail and now is the perfect time to turn this passion I have for writing into something I can be proud of. This may seem like a rash decision, but I’ve been stewing on it for a while now and I guess I have Harry Styles to thank for giving me that final push, to take the leap of faith.

So, expect to see a few changes around here over the next few months, and a whole lot of new content.

Yours Sincerely, Anna. xx

177 notes · View notes

kamilahmademedoit · 6 years

Text

She Loves Control (part 3)

It took me longer this time but I was preoccupied with work and had very little time to write for pleasure. Also, this part is longer. And since we had so little time with Kamilah this chapter, I’m posting this now, after the bare minimum of proofreading - sorry ‘bout that. Fun fact - I wrote the scene of the Gala before we got to meet Vega and... well, I guessed his aesthetic correctly.

Pairing: Kamilah x MC

Words: 3142

Warnings: none this time

Part 1 | Part 2 ...

Anna had this spontaneous, effortless, almost childish way about her that made her not exactly courageous but uninhibited enough to say what was on her mind and do what she felt like doing. She could even be rather charming when she didn’t think much of it and everyone that ever had any role in her life - from her childhood friends to her college flatmates - agreed she was at least somewhat endearing.

“There must be more to life than going through it”, she had told her mom, while packing the suitcase for her year abroad in San Trobida.

“Here for a good time, not a long time”, she used to say while greeting friends at the club, though they found it incredibly cheesy as they’d told her so on multiple occasions.

“I want to feel deeply”, she had told Adrian, one of the first things she ever said to him.

But Anna had never anticipated the intensity of the last few weeks. Because here she was now, convincing an ancient vampire to go to a diner with her like normal people did and she couldn’t quite fathom how it had come to this.

…

“Well, aren’t you looking gorgeous”, Lily passed by the mirror on her way to the kitchen.

“It doesn't count”, Anna informed her. “You wouldn’t be my best friend if you didn’t say that.”

“What? I’d lose my BFF privileges over not paying you a compliment? That’s harsh. Even for you...”

“Come here, ya goofball.” Anna squeezed her in a hug. “Are you sure you’ll be alright?”

“You mean not kill anybody? Yeah, I can manage”, Lily shot back, a small laughter escaping her lips. Anna finally released her, unamused.

“I’ll be fine.” Lily said, her tone serious. “You go have fun… or not, it doesn’t really sound like a party.”

“Well, it’s not.”, Anna confirmed. “I’ll play coordinator all evening, making sure everything goes smoothly...”

“But you’ll also see Kamilah, right?”, Lily inquired, making her blush a little.

“Uh… I… yeah. I guess I will, huh.” Anna tried to feign disinterest but there was no fooling Lily.

“You know I could hear your heart beating faster from miles. I mean, I literally could...”, Lily said, grinning at her own joke, but also at Anna’s meek attempts to disguise her infatuation.

That very moment Anna’s phone lit up on the coffee table and a short ringing sound interrupted their banter.

“It’s Adrian, he’s outside”, Anna announced.

“Saved by the bell”, Lily kept on teasing.

“You’ll be alright?”

“For the last time - yes. Now, go, go, go. Get out of here! Go to that fancy Gala thing. You look like a million bucks and your highlighter game is strong, so nothing can go wrong.” Lily opened the door to the apartment and handed Anna her sequins-covered clutch, rushing her out.

“Okay, bye, but text me if-”, but the door shut before Anna could finish her sentence.

Adrian was waiting for her in a black limousine with dark windows parked right outside of her apartment building. The sun was setting over the cityscape, red and orange hues painted over the glass facades.

“I congratulate myself on my faultless taste”, Adrian greeted Anna as she sat opposite him. “The dress suits you.”

“Thank you”, Anna was quick to reply. “The compliment would mean so much more, hadn’t you turned it on yourself, but I suppose you couldn’t help it.” She said, a cheeky smile in her eyes.

“I’m glad you’re in a good mood”, Adrian returned her smile, though there was visible strain in his expression.

“Unlike you, it seems”, Anna’s smile faded. “What’s going on?”

“Relax”, Adrian chuckled at the sight of her face going from zero to ‘ferals are attacking’ in the span of a few seconds. “It’s nothing supernatural. Unless you consider my business skills exceptionally lacking.” Anna said nothing in response, just raised an eyebrow. Adrian sighed.

“After a couple of failed negotiations you were informed about”, he began and she gave him a slight nod to confirm she was indeed informed, “I have to show everyone business is still going strong. Or as Nicole would put it, we need good press coverage.”

“Well”, Anna smiled at him. “It’s a good thing you have me on your team.”

“It is”, he agreed, returning the smile.

Flashing lights were everywhere. Anna was not prepared to be photographed, much less from the moment the doors of the limousine opened right until they entered the enclosed area where only a few people with cameras were allowed in.

The Gala was held at the grounds of Adam Vega’s enormous colonial style mansion. A cluster of huge cream coloured tents was spread across the lawn, the whole arrangement impressive both in size and in structure. Garlands of what in this light looked like pale blush roses decorated the tents and strings of warm yellow lights created a web over the heads of the guests. The mellow jazz played from a small platform at the far end of the lawn permeated the warm late-April air with bittersweet melancholy as the last red hues in the sky made way for the indigo dusk.

Anna stayed by Adrian’s side as he greeted a few of the guests and posed for pictures with the host. It took almost an hour of pleasantries and picture-taking but after the whole ordeal was over, Adrian visibly relaxed. The air got somewhat lighter and he led her to the bar, hand respectfully placed on her back where her dress provided coverage.

“You look distracted”, he noticed, placing a glass of Old fashioned in front of her.

“Huh?” Anna cast a quick glance his way before searching the crowd again.

“She’s not here”, Adrian said, immediately gaining her attention. “Yet. Texted to tell me she’s on her way a few minutes ago. Traffic.”

“I...”, Anna opened her mouth to say something but Adrian cut her with a smile.

“Have no idea who I’m talking about?”, he suggested.

“Oh, God, I must be so obvious”, Anna finally relented, her expression changing from anxious to defeated. “Lily already makes jokes at my expense, now you...”

“I’m not making jokes.” Adrian shook his head. “And no, you’re not that obvious.”

“Then how…?”

“I had a feeling”, he replied, slightly shrugging. “I’m a good observer, let’s say. And Lily… she’s your best friend.”

“I guess you’re right”, Anna sighed. “I mean, it’s not like I’m making any effort to hide it or anything...”

Adrian lifted his glance from her face with intention. “And here she comes...”, he mumbled. Anna turned around with her whole body to see Kamilah making her way through the crowd, cameras following her every move. In her simple, yet elegant full-length caped wine dress she exuded authority. She graciously allowed Vega to kiss her hand when he came to greet her and exchanged a few words with him before her eyes caught Anna’s for a single fleeting moment.

Kamilah then proceeded with answering some reporter’s questions, her expression unreadable the whole time. Eventually she made her way to the bar to greet Adrian right when Priya Lacroix seemed to stumble upon him, clearly looking for a drink rather than small talk but rising to the occasion nonetheless.

“Don’t you look like a vision in this dress, dear!” Priya turned to Anna after greeting Adrian first.

“Thank you”, Anna replied, suddenly timid.

“Doesn’t she, Kamilah?”, Priya shifted her gaze to her.

“You _are _very talented, Priya”, Kamilah agreed, the corners of her mouth twitching. “Afterall, the mark of a good design is no one paying attention to the dress in favor of the woman wearing it.”

A warmth spread across Anna’s face as she lowered her gaze for a second. Kamilah had noticed she looked even more lovely when blushing, the blood rushing to her cheeks making these soft noises like rivulets did in forests.

Adrian relieved the tension with a small cough that brought Anna’s attention back to the party. A sharply dressed young man had caught her eye and she leaned to Adrian’s side to speak more privately to him.

“This is Harrison Stanford over there. Two years ago he invested four million dollars in a program called ‘Every family’, which funds in vitro procedures. He’s the perfect investor for the new technology Raines Corp. develops - this is personal for him. Oh, also, he and his wife, Jamila, adopted their second child last month.” Anna informed him in a hushed voice. “Ah, yes, it’s a boy, they named him Kamal”, she added, tugging at Adrian’s sleeve and just a moment later another thing came to her mind, so she spoke again. “First child - daughter - Aida.”

“Priya, Kamilah”, Adrian gave each of them a small nod, “I’m pained to leave you so soon, but I have to go congratulate my old friend Harrison over there on his second child. I hope to see you both again before the night is over.”

Adrian smiled at Anna reassuringly and started making his way towards Harrison, leaving her alone with Kamilah and Priya. The silence felt awkward to Anna, though the other two women didn’t seem bothered.

“Well, frankly, I’m getting bored”, Priya spoke again eventually. “And I’m gonna go mingle before Kamilah starts talking about Council business.” She grabbed her drink from the bar before turning to leave.

“Are you enjoying yourself?”, Kamilah asked almost as if she had been waiting for the opportunity.

“I wouldn’t call it that”, Anna replied honestly. “But it’s beautiful.”

“What is?” Kamilah seemed surprised at her answer.

“The whole evening”, Anna said, her eyes on the horizon where the sky was slowly growing black. “The feeling of the warm air on my skin, the smell of these roses… I even like the music. And yes, I might be a little… tipsy.”

Kamilah chuckled, then her expression became somewhat distant, her eyes staring into space. “I hadn’t noticed the roses”, she murmured, then snapped out of it. “I see you have a drink, but would you care to dance?”

“You mean… with you?” Anna seemed taken aback.

“You’re perfectly free to say ‘no’...”

“No, no, I’d love to. I mean, yes… yes, I’d love to… dance with you.” Anna started faltering, her cheeks turning red again.

Kamilah outstretched her arm towards her. The moment their hands touched their fingers intertwined on their own. Kamilah led her to where a few more couples were slow-dancing before gently pulling her closer, her hand on the small of Anna’s back. Their eyes met and for a moment Anna felt home. Nothing had ever felt as familiar as Kamilah’s arms around her. Anna was not typically clumsy, but she couldn’t pass for a good dancer if her life depended on it, yet her feet seemed to be moving on their own now. Everything felt so easy.

And then suddenly the air felt heavy. Something had changed, Kamilah tensed, her arms closed around Anna tighter. There was screaming. People running. Adrian appeared seemingly out of nowhere. “Get her out of here, I’ll deal with this”, he told Kamilah with determination. She gave him a slight nod, her hand closing around Anna’s wrist.

“Wh-what’s… going...on..?” Anna barely verbalised her question. They seemed to cross the yard in seconds, Anna was running out of breath. Once they reached the car, Kamilah turned to her to answer her question, “Ferals.”

“I mean, I figured as much”, Anna said, catching her breath. “But I can’t quite figure out...”

“Why.” Kamilah finished her sentence for her, keeping her eyes on the road, her brows furrowed. She never replied back and a tense silence settled in the car.

…

Kamilah tossed the car keys on the kitchen table first thing after closing the door. The place was spacious and somewhat barren. An open-plan living space with nothing but a black leather couch, a coffee table, a dining area and a modern kitchen with no appliances or food on the counters - no fruit bowls, no vases full of professionally arranged flowers, no paintings on the walls, nor pictures… just a long wall of windows opening up to a balcony overlooking the city.

“Are you feeling alright”, Kamilah asked, her voice softening, her face almost relaxing.

“Yes. It’s not like anything happened to me...”, Anna replied. “But what about those people there?”

Kamilah sighed. She took her eyes off Anna’s face for a moment, looking through the windows instead. “We can’t save everyone”, she said finally. “We can, however, get to the bottom of this.”

“That file you asked me to find for you earlier… You think someone on the Council is behind all of this. And not just omitting the truth but… plotting.”

“I do, in fact, believe this”, Kamilah asserted. “But I was looking for something else today.”

“What?”

Kamilah seemed to asses Anna for a moment. Not questioning whether she could trust her, but rather wondering whether she should involve her in all of this. But then again, Anna was in danger as it was, there really was no way around it anymore.

“Dirty laundry”, Kamilah said after some consideration. “No one on the Council is outright involved in any questionable endeavors. But if you read between the lines...”

“You… intend to blackmail them?”

“God, no”, Kamilah breathed out with a tone of reproach. “Blackmail is such an ugly word. But sometimes loyalty is not enough to persuade a person...”

“Okay, then. Not Blackmail. Whatever it is, whatever you’d rather call it, let me help.” Anna said with determination.

Kamilah held her glance a little too long, her expression unreadable. Anna didn’t back down, didn’t flinch a bit, just stood there meeting her eyes with this almost naive tenacity of hers verging on stubbornness that Kamilah seemed to have a soft spot for.

“Alright”, Kamilah said. “I’ll go change into something… more appropriate. You find all the files and we’ll go over them.”

“Okay.” Anna smiled at her, the smile of a person who got their way. “Wait, where are these files?”

“My office is over there”, Kamilah pointed to a door near the kitchen and then turned in the opposite direction. “They’re on my computer, but you’ll find a full list of passwords somewhere on the desk.”

“You… keep a list?”

Kamilah sighed. “It’s more of a notebook. They are so many and I only use a third of them on daily basis...”

Anna entered her office and turned on the lights. Unlike the rest of Kamilah’s apartment, her office was nearly homey. Her desk was rather messy, something Anna had not anticipated. She opened the laptop and started looking around for the notebook of passwords.

After some fruitless fumbling around Anna opened the top drawer of the desk and started going through the pile of office supplies there, until something sharp scratched the tips of her fingers. She stopped to look at this unexpected finding of hers. A yellowed picture of a woman, a little torn at the edges, pressed between two glass panels, not quite a frame. The picture had faded, but Anna could still make out the dark curls at the woman’s forehead and the strings of pearls around her neck.

Anna suddenly tensed.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry, I was searching for that notebook...”, she turned around to see Kamilah looking at the picture over her shoulder.

“It’s okay”, she assured her softly, her eyes still on the small portrait.

“She’s beautiful… Who is she?”

“Her name was Daisy. Daisy Caulfield. She was quite the little starlet back then”, Kamilah said, her voice holding a sort of nostalgic tenderness and the notes of an inside joke, meant for someone long gone. “But fame never meant much for her.”

“Did you...”

“Love her?”, Kamilah’s eyes met hers, a challenge in them, an unspoken question. Then her gaze softened and she looked at the picture again. “I did. Very much.”

“What happened? I’m sorry, I- You don’t have to tell me...”

“What always happens”, Kamilah replied. “She had a beautiful life. Grew old in a quaint country house like she had dreamed of.”

“So, you didn’t...”, Anna trailed off, searching for something in Kamilah’s now composed expression.

“No. How could I?” Kamilah locked eyes with her as if searching for the answer to her rhetorical question there. “We cannot afford to be selfish with the ones we love, Anna, no matter the pain.”

Anna took a step back. Kamilah was too smart not to be making a point, she never said things without a purpose to them, and Anna felt the subtle accusation in her tone.

“Lily was going to die”, she shot back. Kamilah slightly lifted her brows in surprise.

“I wasn’t referring to your friend”, she said.

“What… what were you implying then?”

“But I already made it clear how I feel about your decision”, Kamilah spoke again as if continuing a thought, disregarding Anna’s question. She turned around, making her way out of the study and into the living room. “You’re meddling in things you can’t even begin to comprehend...”

“To save her life!” Anna insisted, following closely behind her, her expression hardened in stubborn determination.

“To play God”, Kamilah corrected her, slightly shaking her head, a shadow of pain passing behind her eyes.

“How could you say that?”, Anna stopped in the middle of the spacious room as if demanding her undivided attention, wherever she thought she was going. Kamilah turned to her, the city lights twinkling behind her. “She would have died...” Anna breathed out, a hint of disbelief in her voice as if she could never even imagine that.

“Yes,” Kamilah said simply. “She would have. But did you consider it for a second that maybe she should have?”

Anna opened her mouth to reply, but Kamilah wasn’t done.

“Who are _you _to say who is to live or die? Who are you to decide her faith for her? You foolish, selfish little girl...”, Kamilah crossed the distance between them in a split second. “Have you taken a life, Anna?” Kamilah’s penetrating eyes were fixed on hers. “Have you?... No.”

“What point are you trying to make..?”, Anna whispered, though she already knew on some level what Kamilah was talking about.

“If you had the choice,” Kamilah continued, her breath on Anna’s face, her gaze uncomfortable, intrusive “would you keep your parents alive, just to have them by your side for longer, even when their time had come?”

“And would you then”, Kamilah went on without waiting for her answer “have the audacity to say you love them?”

A silence fell upon them that seemed to last forever.

“To love means to respect the other person’s path, Anna. Even if that path takes them away from you.”

Anna stood there in the middle of the living room, blinking back tears, while Kamilah made her way to the balcony.

#kamilah sayeed #kamilah x mc #bloodbound #choices bb #playchoices #choices fandom

97 notes · View notes