#also the reason why they're in the living room instead of the kitchen has-

[creativewhizkid]

i like the headcanon that sketchbook is friends with the lil orange from episode 1

[wulvercazz]

🤖Unwanted Roommate🤖

Welcome to a new AU 💕 lemme present to you: Android!Grimmjow and Android Mechanic!Ichigo this AU became very important to me very quickly so,, I hope you love it as much as I do✨

Also, have a tiny bit of writing as a form of introduction to the story✨

He holds the android's disemodied face plate in his hands with far more care than the asshole deserves; mostly out of respect to the craft.

"You try to kiss me and I'll spit on you."

Surprise, and then an angry flush overcomes his face. Ever since those piercing blue eyes flashed back on (and scared the ever living shit out of him) Ichigo hasn't had a moment of privacy in his own home.

So he's had more than a few people over, so they're a bit loud… and maybe he often forgets Grimmjow's sitting in ramshackled pieces all across his work table; right in the middle of the room where he has a nice view of his small kitchen-bedroom-bathroom. It's a small space.

The only thing someone like him could afford in this city.

It's the only reason why he picks through the trash to find bits and pieces to work with. He wouldn't have taken in such a scary looking dead android otherwise… at least… it would've perhaps been better if it'd actually been dead. He wouldn't have this annoying empathy of his trying to make sense of the broken pieces.

"Ough, shut up, you piece of junk." He mutters in the small space between him and Grimmjow's disassembled face, still flustered, angry at himself for not simply throwing him back out and instead doing what he can to build this asshole a body he can use.

Next part~

[ittyybittybaker]

“neil is living in andrew’s walls” this is going to live in my brain forever now, much like neil in andrew’s walls,

listen i wrote those tags when i was half asleep and i thought that would be it but i am, in fact, still thinking about it !!!! i picture it like this

nicky and the twins live together in the columbia house (kevin technically doesn't live there but he's at their place like 5 nights a week so he might as well at this point)

the columbia house is OLD, like over 100 years so there's all sorts of weird crawl spaces and an attic that no one ever goes into

neil's on the run, jumps into an open window, and finds their crawl space

maybe he's injured and needs a place to lie low for a while

he heals, but their house is reasonably safe and he can steal food from their kitchen when no one's home and he's made a kind of comfy nest in the attic

his favorite spot tho is the crawl space behind andrew's room because nicky and aaron are too loud (nicky with talking to erik and aaron with katelyn/video games probably). andrew just listens to music and like. reads or something

as he heals, neil gets braver and starts to go out into the house more and more. maybe he cleans up the kitchen every now and then or he folds the towels they leave in the dryer as a thank you for their unknowing hospitality

(really he's just bored from being cooped up for so long, even if their house is the nicest place he's stayed in a long while.)

the cousins start to notice weird things are happening

nicky thinks the house is haunted

aaron thinks they're all just being forgetful about what they leave around the house

kevin thinks they need to check the carbon monoxide detector (he saw a documentary about it once and won't stop talking about it)

but andrew doesn't believe in the supernatural, and he also doesn't think it's a mass hallucination

he spends the most time at home, and he swears he's heard a muffle laugh or too when he makes fun of kevin

and what ghost changes the channel to espn

he swears he sees someone with striking blue eyes in the kitchen one night around 3am when he's getting a glass of water but when he turns on the light there's no one there and the doors are locked from the inside

kevin's not the only one who's seen a documentary, and andrew's just watched one about a man living in someone's walls

he mentions his theory one day at breakfast but everyone just thinks he's making fun of them, so he makes a plan to prove himself right

he researches into the history of the house and find the blueprints in some archival records, and sees the weird spaces in the walls (at the library of course, if there was someone living in his walls he wouldn't risk them seeing his investigating)

neil thought he was being careful, but he was getting comfortable there and he forgot to clean up his attic nest one day. he snuck out to grab some much needed supplies from the store and also to stretch his legs

this just so happens to be the day andrew goes investigating, and finds neil's hideaway

he's there waiting for neil when he returns

somehow neil convinces andrew to let him stay by saying "you've already taken in one stray after all (aka kevin) so why not another?"

andrew has to admit, he's got a point. and he really is very pretty

so andrew lets neil hideout in his room instead of in the crawl space behind the walls

andrew starts spending a lot more time in his room. the others hear strange noises and shuffling from behind the door, even when andrew isn't home

nicky and aaron think he's adopted a pet without telling them

(they're only half wrong)

yadda yadda andriel do their thing, they build trust by sharing secrets and truths and kisses, etc

andrew decides that neil is a permanent addition to his life, and he won't ever have to hide away again

one day nicky and aaron come home and andrew's cuddling on the couch with neil

"andrew, who is this"

"this is neil."

"cool ... where did he come from"

"he was living in the walls."

"... i'm sorry, what?"

"i was right. you both owe me $20"

"...i'm sorry, WHAT?"

"ssshhh, can you keep it down? he just fell asleep."

"Andrew. what the actual FUCK-"

unfortunately, andrew is no longer paying attention. he's much too busy playing with neil's hair as he dozes

and they all lived happily ever after and no body ever lived in the walls ever again

[toomuchracket]

Being ‘besties’ w Matty, and sharing a flat. Neither of you really know you’re in love w the other, or maybe you do but you’ve suppressed it. I’m thinking about how it is when one of you has someone spend the night.

Matty meeting them in the kitchen the next morning and being very polite (perhaps too polite, offering them coffee). And as soon as they’ve left Matty just says ‘no. You can do better than that’. And then that day he is extra tactile with you- kissing you on the head, ruffling your hair, pulling you into multiple hugs by grabbing at your jumper.

And when Matty has someone stay and it’s your turn to meet them. How does that go?? Maybe he teases you a bit. If you complain you could hear them going at it, he just laughs and says ‘you should’ve joined us’.

Matty bursting into your room in the early hours. “I NEED A CONDOM. WHERE DO YOU KEEP THEM?” And he is rifling through your drawers before you’ve even woken up properly.

Him blasting music in his headphones because he cannot stand hearing you with someone else.

I have so many thoughts related to this concept!!!

oh you're both absolutely in love with each other but you're both kinda terrified to fuck up the dynamic by admitting it in case it goes tits up and someone has to move out (a proper nightmare especially in this cost of living crisis, actually) so it's all kind of meaningless sexual encounters and they're all kind of unfulfilling because the person you wish you were sleeping with and trying to distract yourself from thinking about is literally through the wall right now with their headphones on (although i think sometimes on the days when the yearning for each other is really bad then they do listen for a little bit for, uh, selfish reasons before it starts to hurt). and most of the time you both kick people out after you've fucked them, out of respect for your flatmate, but there's one night you're just so exhausted that you fall right asleep after it and then you run into matty the next morning and it just triggers this sense of possessiveness within him - he's being overly polite so he doesn't snap the guy's neck out of jealousy, and yeah he's extra tactile and almost-boyfriendy with you that day and you actually really like it. and in terms of matty having a girl stay over, i think it would be really funny if that also triggered his possessiveness as well as yours. like, you're in the kitchen with your coffee seething watching this beautiful girl stand in your hallway hugging matty, and then she sees you in the kitchen and comes in and starts flirting with you like "matty i understand why you didn't introduce me to her last night because i literally wouldve slept with her instead holy shit" and he's like "ok it was great to see you BYE" and after she leaves you're like "she can come back anytime" and he's like "no she fucking cannot". i think the condom thing is funny the way you said it, but i also think that it's the straw that breaks the camel's back in terms of the two of you finally getting together. matty bursts into your room at like 4am looking for one, and it's the first time you've ever actually seen each other face to face on one of the nights where you have someone over. he's half-dressed and dishevelled, and you're half-asleep with bedhead and he can't actually look at you because you look so adorable that it hurts his heart (very be my mistake you do make me hard but she makes me weak vibes), so he just blindly flails towards your bedside table and grabs one BUT in doing that he ends up on top of you and looks at you properly and maybe you've stolen an old t-shirt of his to wear to bed and you're both breathing heavily looking into each other's eyes and he says something like "i don't want to go back through there to use this" and you go "then don't... kick her out and come back to me" and you kiss for the first time and he kicks the girl out and you two finally have sex and all is well <3

[shiraishi-kanade]

Favourite headcanon about Yuka Shiraishi?

Oh, this is going to be a hot mess of a hc dump. I hope you enjoy them nonetheless.

- Yuka can actually cook decently well. She's not like, great at it, but it's not like everything she cooks is inedible. But because Ken is that much of a better cook than her, she sometimes the weaponized incompetence thing where she just so happen to grab salt instead of sweet and almost add it to the dish so Ken can take over the cooking process. Ken is fully aware, finds it endearing and gives in every time. Both An and Yuka love his cooking so much, so why not?

- An wasn't aware of the fact until around High School, however, and thought her mom's just actually terrible. This was the Shiraishi way to motivate An to learn to cook for herself and not rely on her mother or dad for breakfast and such. It worked!

- That said, Yuka was genuinely a horrible cook in college, mostly surviving on instant noodles and takeout. When Ken visited her dorm/room for the first time when they started dating, his reaction can be best described by "damn girl, you live like this?"

- They first met in college, but their actual first meeting was more like An and Kohane, with Yuka getting lost on Vivid Street or somewhere nearby. She got to see a whole new perspective on a just some guy she met on campus sometimes but who otherwise seemed completely ordinary, and that was the moment Yuka become interested in him.

- Both Ken and Yuka were friends for a long time before either of acted on their feelings. College, man! On top of Ken's musical career too! They didn't have time for dating. Nobody was surprised when they got together, though.

- Nagi and Yuka we very good friends from the get go. Yuka is actually older than Nagi by a few years, but Nagi was just acting full on like an older sister, showing Yuka around Vivid Street and getting her into the culture. Despite not being related to Ken, Nagi fully considered herself Yuka's sister-in-law, and both acted accordingly.

- Nobody thought they would stay together, though. It really just seemed like a very incompatible relationship on the surface, but both Yuka and Ken really tried to make it work.

- She and Ken originally wanted a very low-key marriage, the "friends and family only" kind of thing. Unfortunately, news got out anyway, and for the next three months they had to deal with so. Many. Gifts. Their house was practically stuffed for a while.

- She has her own little study room, with shelves full to the brim with textbooks and teaching materials. She actually has an "do not disturb" poster she puts on when she's working during the exam period and while grading papers, and the unspoken rule in the house is to not sing, play music or speak loudly while she's doing that, both because they love her and want to help her through tough time at work and because angry Yuka is a beast to be reckoned with.

- She's also the reason Shiraishi household is in a perpetual state of comfortable mess. Every single room just feels so lived in because Yuka (and An) is very prone to just leave things where they're standing when they get distracted by something. This is why there's so many books, CDs, kitchen appliances and clothes just. All over the place. Once in a while Ken sighs and puts things into their places, but it just returns to its messy state in around a week's time, so they all got used to it.

- A lot of people on Vivid Street were worried that Yuka would be insistent on An getting a conventional career, but Yuka isn't just chill, she's pretty excited about An's musical future. She married Ken of all people, and from the looks of it her job isn't particularly high-pay either, so why on earth would she care about things like "financial stability"? Pff.

- I don't think her parents ever approved of the relationship: iirc, An having grandparents isn't even mentioned anywhere. Yuka didn't care one bit though.

- She went through gifted kid to burnt out gifted kid to found something that brings her genuine joy and found comfort in studying it pipeline in her life; her relationship with school is very complicated and she's also been kind of a girlfailure through college, barely scraping by on some subjects, with Ken doing much better despite not really giving a damn about it.

- She has a very nice voice and can sing pretty well, but she has a particular issue with stage fright specifically about singing than she never got to fix. She'll sing for/with her family sometimes, but nothing other than that.

- She grew up in a kind of... Very normal but very lonely environment, with a nuclear family and not that many friends or relatives. This is why she kind of got culture shock when she first arrived at Vivid Street and notice how tight-knit the community was, to the point where she thought some of those people loved each other more than her parents loved each other and that she actually really missed something like this in her life. Striving to be part of a community, even if she herself wasn't really musically inclined, is a huge reason of why she stayed there.

- She helped that one "sexy onee-chan" npc (sorry) kindergarten teacher to get into college! They have weekly cafe meetups where they discuss their students and teaching methods; Yuka kind of sees her as her student as well, and vice versa.

- She has ADHD, and she's also the one who passed it down to An. Yuka was both comforted by recognising her own behaviours and mannerisms in An and very worried, because she was afraid An would have to face the same struggles she did; but in a lot of ways her own experience with it helped her give An coping mechanism and strategies that worked for her and the reason she had a very happy childhood overall. Yuka herself wasn't so lucky.

- Not a single gift she ever got for Ken on any holiday hasn't been at least a little embarrassing, from awkward jewellery to socks with hand embroidery. Yuka enjoys making him cringe but accept the gifts anyway because she finds it absolutely hilarious. Nagi and An did as well; Ken, not so much.

tl;dr: I love Yuka Shiraishi, even though I literally thought Ken was a single father for a year and that still remains one of my favourite AUs. I hope her sprite is absolutely hilarious.

[thisismehappy]

Olivia's Apartment: A study with terrible gifs

Season 15/Early 16

Seems like the back door leads to a bedroom, but you never see it so that's debatable. Brian said it was a small apartment which would seem to imply one bedroom, but it's not explicit. When Noah has been with her for four months already, she had his crib in the living room which also kinda implied there was only one bedroom. When she opens the door for Melinda there are not big lights in the hallway which we'll look at more later.

Late Season 16

Partway though season 16 the crib moves so that it's visible through the back door which is a little confusing. Is that a bedroom? Is he sleeping in a little vestibule area? In this scene there are now the big lights in the hallway that we see when Elliot shows up in OC 2x03.

Season 17-19

Partway though season 17 the back door starts showing a shelf instead of a crib. We only ever see a bedroom in this apartment in season 19 and it's Noah's. It opens to a little hallway that has a couple of doors. The implication I assume is that one is the back door we've seen since season 15 and the other is Liv's room (never seen). When someone knocks at the door she goes through the one that seems like it's the backdoor to the apartment. But when she walks through it there's a chair and an end table but when she lets the lady in, it's the same shelf we've been seeing since season 17. (The Munch scene is from 18 and the scene with the lady is from 19 right after she walks out of Noah's room.) Also, when she lets the lady in, the door is brown instead of white like it is when Elliot shows up later, but I think we can say there were some upgrades over the years.

Season 22

As far as I can recall we don't see much of the apartment in 20 or 21 and if we did it wasn't much different. The apparent in this scene is pretty much the same as always, but I like that Liv's idea of decorating for Christmas is to just drape light over things. This looks like essentially the same furniture as when Elliot shows up. Same TV stand and couch I think and the same lamp the TV too, but there's a new giant fancy one in the next scene too which is maybe why it's brighter lol.

OC 2x03 (SVU Season 23)

Okay I thought this was a different apartment which is what started me on this whole road, but upon further review, it's the same one. The door is different (could have been upgraded) and as far as I know this is the first time we've gotten a full view of the hallway. But idk for sure about that. Someone let me know if I missed it before. Also, the walls seem whiter to me but it could be lighting or she painted. They were super white in season 16 though too. So if she painted, she's done it at least twice. I just realized it didn't make it into any of these gifs but the ugly brown chair Elliot sits in has been around since season 15. In the first shot we see when they're unpacking the apartment, it's there. I like to think it was Brian's chair that she adopted when he left. (No real reason except I enjoy the idea of Elliot sitting in Brian's chair lmao.) The lights above her kitchen island are a little different too I think, but again just could have been upgraded sometime. It's also just way cleaner, but maybe she was going through a phase. (Re: the brown chair. I thought I remembered seeing it in the new place but I only have 24x10 downloaded so far and I couldn't find it so I'm not sure if I imagined that or if it's in one of the other episodes.)

The 500th Episode (later in Season 23)

This looks like a completely different apartment to me. Now it is possible that the mystery door from Noah's hallway leads to an intensely long hallway that doesn't stylistically match the rest of the apartment, but it seems like maybe this is when she moved. Or the first time we would have seen evidence of it. I think this hallway could work with the new place as far as style and size. As far as I know, these are the most recent 3 times we've seen Liv's apartment, but I could be wrong about that so if anyone's still with me let me know if you've seen other things that support or refute this idea.

@rahleeyah - Just in case you're interested lmao. You were right about the apartment in OC 2x03. I think we were just seeing it from weird angles which threw me off lol.

[sparklingbluerose]

1P!Hetalia x Reader x 2P!Hetalia

One day, you had come across a pet shelter in which, you wanted to adopt a single cat. But instead of one, it seems all of them didn't want to let you go...

A/N: LEMME TELL YOU I ENJOYED THIS SO MUCH–

☆

TW: None! Have some very fluffy crack XD

GN! (Y/N) 《Other Genders Will Also Be Made》

☆

Ahahaha...it's just pure chaos, you don't know how it all suddenly happened but it did!

You seriously just wanted to adopt a cat. A single cat.

But why do you have like– 22 cats in your house? Oh yes, there's a very simple answer to all of that. You see, the cats just couldn't let you leave them 🥺

We have some very clingy ones, apparently. The owner explained no one has come to adopt any cat there in ages.

And as the very kind person you are, as usual you took all of them in no matter how hard it must be. Wow, what a nice person you are 🤡❤️

Sometimes it's hard, but hey, it was fun naming them.

You find it funny whenever they try to race into your bedroom very loudly to have you give them a bath.

Your house seems a lot more lively than usual because of them, and of course you don't mind. It was better than being alone for the rest of your life–

Feliciano often hides from Luciano, which always knocks over some of your furniture which you're devastated at.

Not all of them get along well but you try to...💀

Lots of eerie staring with Kiku and Kuro. Everytime they do it you just freak out at the cold auras radiating from them.

...You once tried calling 911 but remembered they're CATS.

Just you sitting sulking in the corner with all of the crazy cats and Ludwig tryna comfort you— good boi 👏

You always lock your bedroom door before sleeping because...you wake up to ripped sheets and a broken window + a running bathroom faucet. So yeah.

Never again will you adopt these hoes in your next life 🤡

Romano both loves and hates getting picked up by you. Like he goes from "PUT ME DOWN" to "i love you thanks"–

Honestly...sometimes you also have to admit that the cats can get a little weird. One time you woke up and went to make some breakfast but..

FELICIANO WAS INSIDE THE FRIDGE– WHAT?? ✋️💀

He was resting with the tomato sauce too. Oh, did he want some pasta? You still couldn't wrap your head around this..

Often times you'd see Flavio sleeping in a pile of your clothes as well. It was adorable but how'd he get in your-?

Ah, whatever. You'd let him anyways, it always seems like he likes being around outfits or sewing materials. Though it was kinda weird you guessed he just liked fashion or smth.

LMAO HELP YOU ALMOST BURNED KURO ON THE STOVE BECAUSE HE WAS CHILLING THERE–

He was camouflaged on the black stove lmao...😭

You would never forget that day when he looked at you with his red eyes in such disgust and rage-

But hey, you're on better terms now. All because you gave him some sushi and watched pokemon with him...well, whatever. As long as things are better.

Lutz and Gillen always like going on the table for some reason. Probably away from the dumbasses fighting–

You won't admit, you love seeing them get along.

...Honestly it's refreshing because of the daily cat chaos, just having a break from seeing all of that madness.

Same is true with Allen and Oliver whenever you cook something nice or bake some desserts. They love the smell and just watch you be peaceful with yourself 🌮🍪

..You think Arthur hates you. No, he's just a tsundere babes there's no need to worry. Don't be sad the next time he tries to wriggle out of your fluffy hugs–

Luciano also once napped beside some kitchen knives of yours but let's not talk about that...👁👄👁

All of them are so strange but you love them anyway.

"waIT ZAO DON'T DRINK THAT, THAT'S ALCOHOL–" ...that was definitely a day to remember.

Sometimes Zao and Yao don't get along. But when you tell them to they gladly oblige because you're...

#thebestownertohaveeverexisted ❤️

Also, mind you but maybe it would be a better idea to never let Francis inside your room ever again. Once he takes a liking to napping on your bed he WON'T GET OUT.

You act like the mom of everyone. But it's still true because you have to stop Francoiş from scratching Matthew.

Poor little cat is scared for his life...and you always have to pull them away from each other before Mattheiu joins in.

Also you don't wanna be around Ivan or Viktor all the time.

Dudes have such bad aura's and it freaks you out so much. You just probably hide in your room when that happens.

But Alfred just runs beside you and hides with you. Heck, ALL OF THEM DO. It surprises you how much they're freaking out more than you...oh wait, they're cats too.

You feed them all the food they like, but if it includes something they shouldn't eat you just give them smth else.

KIKU CUDDLES YOUR FOOT AAAAA 😭💞

He doesn't liked being touched but maybe when you nonchalantly just say–

"If you want you can just sit beside me or smth.." Look if you just say yes you'll have the best cat in the world. I wish i had a pet like this. They're feral.

Cuddle nights! Happens every Friday and Saturday. You just put up a movie hugging yourself on the couch then boo–

Gilbert sits on your head. He's a light cat somehow.

Then you suddenly have like...everyone sitting beside you.

But aww 🥺 you love them so much, you know that you can't ask for any better.

"Look, you guys. Stop fighting i love you all so much and i could never ask for a better life i'm happy that ya'll are here and that i won't be alone the entire time–"

You said all that in one breath. The cats appreciate you, homie. Never let them go.

Love them please, they deserve all of it 💖

(THIS IS LONG– but it means i enjoyed it XD)

Taglist: @stygianoir

[bruhstation]

You mentioned that we could ask about peoples childhood? I was wondering about diesel the bi Italian gamer himself?

don't forget catholic. ask and you shall receive!

from the very start, diesel is intended to be the foil to duck. they went through the same difficult circumstances, but the way they approached it was different.

giovanni vin diesel:

giovanni – nicknamed “giogio” (read: jojo) by his siblings – was born in sicily, italy to a family that runs a local restaurant. at the time giovanni was a kid, the restaurant has been running for around 5 generations. throughout his life prior to coming to sodor, he was always surrounded by his huge number of family members. his grandmother, parents, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins, et cetera… they're always around both the restaurant and his home; cooking, serving, cleaning, basically anything. and giovanni is no exception to all of this, often told by his grandmother to help out at the kitchen after school.

at a young age giovanni realized how "traditional" his family is, constantly sticking to predetermined methods of doing things and rarely listening to suggestions or criticism that others give. whenever he's not cooking for customers, giovanni liked experimenting with old recipes and creating new ones, usually adding his own touches and substituting this ingredient with that ingredient. this didn't sit well with his grandmother who's extremely headstrong about the way things are done. giovanni tried to reason with her multiple times and wanted her to try his own recipes, but his grandmother didn't care about how much he put in effort and always pushed his attempts away.

his grandmother (and the rest of the vin diesel family) is also a very devout catholic, constantly praying for the lord and mother mary to forgive them of their sins (what did diesel ever do wrong?) and bless their lives (that's silly). this is another thing giovanni disagreed on, because he thought "why do people rely on the power of gods that may or may not exist? if we want to improve, we do it ourselves and we rejoice over it ourselves". diesel is very much for progress and the evolution of age, technology, and culture – and this do not sit well with his family. they never outright told him, but he's some kind of outcast in the household.

giovanni wanted to go to concerts and have fun. he didn't want to church and interact with the nosy churchgoers there. he wanted to have a walkman and decorate his room in posters and vinyl disks and go to arcades and actually make friends that understand him instead of making fun of how "weird" or "stubborn" he is. his friends are already having dates, going to the movies without their parents, and staying up past curfew. why can't he? giovanni felt ashamed, especially at how his friends treated him like he's some country boy and made fun of him.

when he was around 15 years old, giovanni tried running away from home. he just felt like doing it after having enough of his grandmother's discouragements and how his family never picked his side. he felt like there will never be a moment where anyone would side with him, so he made up his mind and wanted to live on his own. the moment giovanni set foot in rome, he regretted the decision because he realized he didn't know where to stay and that he didn't bring enough money with him.

a police stationed there took notice of giovanni, stating that someone is looking for him. his older sister actually got to rome faster than him and immediately dragged him back home, constantly berating him along the way. then his grandmother did, then the rest of his family did. he's then labeled the problem child, and since he lived in a tight-knit neighborhood, many believed that something bad happened in his family or that giovanni is actually a very difficult child to handle behind his polite demeanor. for a decade, it stayed that way. and for a decade, giovanni has always believed that his family was right in some ways.

he's just not fit for this kind of life. he needs to go somewhere far away, someplace where he can shine.

giovanni then turned 25. he graduated college and was still helping around the restaurant. his family kept pressuring him to look for a girl to marry and settle down with at his age. he's still not giving up on his goal to find a place where he doesn't have to deal with his family's extremely traditional (and borderline conservative) views and can do whatever he wanted to do.

one day, he found a flyer about the island of sodor.

[amiharana]

currently declining to study for bio and am instead thinking about college au revalink where they have an apartment together because they are such Boyfriends and link is a bio major because he just Loves Nature but he's struggling with studying (can you see the self projecting😁🙏) he definitely has gifted kid burnout

meanwhile revali is a major perfectionist like if he gets below a 90 on anything he wants to start crying and tbh even a 90-95 is too low for him, don't ask me what he majors in though idk

anyways they are struggling together but link is just not having a good time and is stressing out studying so much he forgets to take care of himself so revali has to get him to remember things like eating regularly or showering or sleeping ANYWAYS i just felt like projecting onto revalink🫶

as a fellow bio major with gifted kid burnout who doesn't wanna study for bio (can you believe i still have a fucking bio lab due tomorrow. it's spring break for me rn. blasphemy.), i 'm 100% all for this projection COUNT ME IN!

link is totally a nature guy but i lowkey feel like he would make a great veterinarian 🥺 he's just a little guy who loves his silly little creatures 🥺🥺🥺 what do you think about revali going to flight school to be a pilot 😳 like i think if revali wasn't doing something viciously intense like. becoming a neurosurgeon or some shit, anything related to aviation is absolutely right up his alley. DEF agree with him being a perfectionist. a 99.9% will make revali lose his shit, he'll be in his professor's office hours taking up the whole time just arguing why he deserves a 103%

link brings home strays all the time and gives revali the 🥺 eyes, and revali is very weak for both link and a cute little creature, but he has to be the voice of reason since they realistically cannot take care of a pet full-time with how demanding school is on both of them. so to compromise, they foster the strays and take care of them with the local vet until they can be taken to a shelter for adoption. link gets hands-on experience which is good for his vet program but he also cries his eyes out every time they send off one of the animals because those are his babies 🥺 link with his strays is that one tiktok that's like BITCH I'M A MOTHER!!!!! NO DRAMA!!!!!

to deal with link's post-foster pet depression, zelda brings her puppy terrako to their apartment to let link cry and play with him, while revali just rolls his eyes (and secretly is looking into surrounding shelters and pet stores to find the perfect pet for the both of them once school isn't so intense for them anymore 🥺)

do you think they have study dates at a cafe or do they stay home and rot in the living room studying together? because i love the idea of study dates but if link is a bio major looking to become a vet and reval is an aviation student trying to become a pilot, these bitches must be stressed out of their mind i think. the week before finals week they're camping out in the living room and haven't slept in their bedroom for a couple days, the room is covered in papers and diagrams and books and pens and markers and flashcards and sticky notes. revali's hair is a mess which is a rare occasion, and it's held up by one of those hair claw clips, he has his glasses on, meanwhile link is lying facedown on the floor having his third breakdown of the hour. in this au i'm thinking that revali is a decent enough cook but neither of them have the energy or the time to go to the grocery store or kitchen to cook an actual meal, so they're living off of takeout and instant noodles for those two weeks. but revali definitely is the one in charge of time maintenance and prying link's ipad out of his hands to make him take a shower or drink water

it all pays off in the end because they both get high grades on their finals!!! link and revali cheer but immediately go to their bed, curl up around each other and sleep for the rest of the weekend because these bitches are exhausted 😭 hashtag ScholarLife

[fratboykate]

Listen. Absolutely make tomato war 2.0. We want the pain. We want the fluff. We want it ALL.

Also I feel like as soon as Kate's kids are unhappy, she tells her vagina to shut up. The babies are always her priority. She will NOT let them feel less than the most important things in her life.

But also like... they're used to Yelena being a workaholic? Like school events get missed here and there, and yeah, it hurts, but they're used to it? And Kate HATES it. She's had talks with Yelena. She's had talks with Alexei about it because Melina has some similar issues.

Give us tomato war 2.0. Give us the kids wanting to see mama, but she's staying with grandma and grandpa for now because her and mommy need to figure some things out and Kate's angry crying because Alex is so calm through all of this but then Kate hears her sobbing in her room one night.

I have zero will power when you dangle angst in front of me so here's a five minute pain blurb you basically forced me write at 2:30am :) lol

---

10:37pm

Yelena trudges into the dimly lit bedroom she shares with Kate. To her surprise, it’s unoccupied. No trace of her partner. Weird. Yelena just walked by Kate’s office and the light was off. Their kitchen and living room are empty too.

She tiptoes into the kids' rooms, where she gently kisses their foreheads without waking them up. Still, no Kate to be found. WTF?

Despite feeling the weight of fatigue bearing down on her, Yelena decides to check the guest room, the one that is often used for naps or quiet reading. There she finds Kate lying in bed. Yelena is more than familiar with the sound of Kate’s breathing when she’s asleep and that’s not what she hears, so she turns the light on.

"Babe, why are you in here?" Yelena asks, puzzled. Silence. Yelena prods, still not realizing anything is wrong. “Kate…I know you’re awake.” Yelena knits her brow and steps further into the bedroom, sitting on the empty side of the mattress. Now she can see that Kate’s eyes are wide open, but she’s perfectly still and quiet. Yelena chuckles. “Are you ignoring me?” Kate says nothing and instead flips around, turning her back to Yelena. Yelena scoffs, starting to lose the sliver of patience she has left at this time of night. “Real mature, Kate.”

"I'm trying to avoid an argument." Kate snaps, voice low and strained.

“An argument about what?”

“What day is it today?" Kate’s words carry an undertone of anger.

“Wednesday.”

“What’s circled on the calendar in red marker on this Wednesday? What’s been circled FOR WEEKS?”

“I don’t know, Kate. I haven’t memorized the calendar by heart. It’s on the fridge for a reason.” Yelena retorts, her frustration rising.

“Yeah, it’s on the fridge, so we all know where we have to be and when. That's the entire point.” Kate bites back.

Yelena falls silent, feeling the tension between them thickening. She allows her fatigued body to fall against the headboard.

“Is that all you’re going to give me?” Yelena’s voice is softer, almost pleading.

“The calendar is still on the fridge.” Kate remains cold and distant.

Yelena petulantly hops off the guest bed and shuffles over to the kitchen. Kate stays, immobile. Moments later, Yelena slowly tramps back into the bedroom but doesn’t move to the bed this time. She closes the door behind her to keep their voices contained and once it’s closed, she presses her back against it before crossing her arms over her chest.

“Why didn’t you call or text me?”

That sets Kate off and she lifts her head to glare at her wife. How is this HER fault?

“BECAUSE THE CALENDAR IS ON THE FUCKING FRIDGE! I shouldn’t have to chase you to show up.” The silence and tension grow even heavier. “He was sad you weren’t there. He’d never say it, but I know he was. You could tell.”

“Wasn’t he a tree in the background?”

Kate sneers.

“Jesus fuck dude, how do you make everything that’s not about you sound so unimportant? Yeah. He was ‘a tree in the background’, but he was damn good at it. Not that you care, apparently. You didn’t even ask.”

Yelena hangs her head.

“I’m sorry. I am. I should’ve looked at the calendar more closely...I had a breakthrough. It was a mistake. Wrong beaker into the wrong burette which...could’ve gone terribly, but...it didn’t.” Yelena becomes animated, excited even over what she’s about to share. “Turns out the altered residues in the polymerase are solvent-exposed and…”

“I don’t care. I don’t. You probably could’ve come to the same conclusion tomorrow morning. It’s not an excuse.”

Kate cuts her off, weary and exasperated. Yelena allows her words to trail off, realizing that Kate isn’t interested in her work. The quiet lingers.

Yelena can sense she’s let Kate down but doesn’t know how to make it right. It seems like she’s perpetually asking for forgiveness lately, but it also never seems to be enough to make up for anything. It’s like nothing she does is enough. For any of them.

“You’re right. It’s not. But I can’t do anything about it right now. It happened. I’ll apologize to him tomorrow. I’m sure he’ll understand.”

“Will he? Because to be honest, I think we’re all a little sick of your apologies.” Kate’s words are laced with bitterness.

Yelena feels a lump forming in her throat. Deep down, she knows Kate’s right, but the surge of anger and frustration those sentences trigger inside the blonde stop her from being objective and level-headed.

“You’re being unfair.”

“I’m not doing this with you right now.” Kate tells her flatly and with finality.

Kate lies back down and covers herself with the duvet completely. Yelena can only see the shape of her under the covers.

“Doing what, Kate?” Kate says nothing. “You’re insufferable sometimes. You know that?”

“Must’ve learned it from somewhere.” Kate mutters from under the blanket.

“I tried to talk to you, tried to fix it. Remember that.”

“I don’t need to remember shit, dude. That’s you.”

“Good night, Katherine.”

Yelena shuts the light off and steps out of the guest bedroom, a surge of emotions and the weight of her mistake coursing through her. Kate wipes the single angry tear that escapes. It’s not worth it.

[sabakos]

Since I still have the wikipedia page open, here's the nine largest animal phyla ranked from worst to best.

9. Arthropoda. Is anyone really surprised to see this here? The only nice thing anyone ever has to say about bugs is that our ecosystem depends on them, which is true for everything else on this list. Some will object that arthropoda contains more than just bugs, but I contend that instead everything else in the clade should also just be considered a bug, because they bug me. The best arthropods are the ones that eat smaller, more annoying arthropods. Like spiders, which eat insects, or crabs, which eat British monarchs. The really chill arthropods like trilobites are all long dead and nothing we've got today can ever live up to it. They were supposed to be the vessel for the perfect ontology but it all went wrong somewhere and no one is quite sure why.

8. Platyhelminthes. Flatworms. I don't have much of an opinion on them, but the fact that their name doesn't follow the usual phyla naming conventions implies something I don't like. They don't have an inside so there's no place for a soul to go. I'm already bored of them.

7. Porifera. Sponges. At some point a line had to be drawn and the philosophical question of what exactly *is* an animal had to be suppressed, and the line was drawn here. No matter how many pictures of sponges I see, I will always picture a kitchen sponge. I don't really think these should count as animals, but I also don't hate them, I can tolerate their existence. I feel about them the way my homophobic uncle who insists he's not homophobic feels about me: willing to be in the same room, but merely accepting his fate, not comfortable.

6. Nematoda. Roundworms. I always hated the episode of Spongebob Squarepants where they ate his house, but I've since learned that they are actually pretty important. I'm not really sure what they're important for, but the biologists I wasn't paying attention to seemed really excited about something. Also these are the main reason you need to take you cat to the vet other than to make your cat unable to make more cats. Which is a fitting but not too cruel or exacting revenge for everything else my cats put me through. I guess they get a C+.

5. Annelida. Segmented worms. Animal biology should be called wormology because animal biologists all love worms for some reason. If I was going to have to talk about something unrelated while pretending to talk about another kind of worms after this, I was probably going to give up on this post. Fortunately, we've already gotten to the best ones. Segmented worms are all of my friends that I used to dig up as a small child and play with because the other children didn't want to be friends with me for some reason. In high school, we learned how to do dissections in stamp collecting class using an earthworm and it was a very emotional experience for me.

4. Echinodermata. Common name? Nah. These are basically just all of the squishy mouth-anus toroids that live in the ocean and never figured out how to grow a backbone. They aren't very intelligent, but they're doing their own thing with symmetry and I respect that. A lot of scientists cut their arms off because the arms grow back and the scientists wanted to figure out how to make humans grow their arms back after they cut them off. That particular line of research appears not to have panned out. It looks funny when a sea cucumber poops, a gif of this lives in my head and can be summoned at will as a free action; I recommend cultivating this ability within yourself.

3. Chordata. Hey, that's me! And all the other vertebrates. It would be chauvinistic and delusional to rank the chordates as the highest creatures, so I didn't. I could talk a lot about different kinds of chordates and why they matter, but if you're talking about phyla you probably aren't talking about any of that because it's all very interesting and useful information that people mostly know already. e.g. I know what a zebra is. The only question about chordates is whether the best ones are the ones that always lived in the water or the ones that decided to go back. My vote is with the whales but there are a lot of sharks I know would be unhappy to hear me say that.

2. Cnidaria. Jellyfish. I really hope I don't have to justify this ranking above Chordates too strongly. Some of them are immortal. Many of them are poisonous. All of them are beautiful. I don't know why anyone would choose to be a human or some kind of bird or cactus when they could float in the ocean and just hang out for all eternity. All the capacity for higher brain function we developed was only to make up for what we lost in humble simplicity.

0. Mollusca. Giving these a mere positive integer ranking would be a grievous error. Our philosophers and psychologists have racked their brain trying to figure out the complexities of human consciousness, but it will all be for nought; we will one day be forced to concede that whatever and how many things "consciousness" really includes, our own pales in comparison to the dreams and aspirations of even the simplest bivalve. We will, too, in resignation, eventually abandon such childish notions as the persistence of the self in humans and dolphins as mere phantasms, but the sacred mind of the octopus will enclose us in its tentacles. These are the beloved, chosen vessels of the Demiurge, the craftsman that built this world and all of existence. Their prayers are the ones that are answered. Fried Calamari is an affront to the divine creation, we are but plodding, naive barbaric children battering ontological perfection in beer and bread crumbs for 6.95. Once we know, we will never forgive ourselves for our sins, though we will be forgiven. Lovecraft was on to far more than he knew, and this was not mere coincidence, but rather a protopsionic invocation of teleological fulfillment. Human society will one day, as Lovecraft predicted in his insolence, either find its true path in the veneration of the cephalopod, or, in guilt and shameful respect, retreat onto other planets to live out our own meager, inferior existence beyond the blessings of the solar winds.

[bravevolunteer]

@comfrtcrowd asked: 💋: for our muses to share a kiss under the mistletoe FITZ KEES :knife: // festive scenarios

THEY'RE AT A CHRISTMAS PARTY, or rather, a festive excuse to have a party— the only real indications of the season are the decorations hung up in every corner, the spiked eggnog, and the holiday songs spaced between the music. Still, it's the kind of event Michael would usually pass on, if not for the reason behind the slightly intoxicated smile that colors his expression now. Everyone is too caught up in reaching the bottoms of their own drinks to notice the two of them ( except for Annie, whose eyes Michael has caught and tried to shoo away a few times now— he'll apologize later ). It makes it easier for Michael to relax, too, as if he and Fitz are the only ones in the room.

Wincing as he takes a swig after they ventured to the kitchen, Michael shoots him a look that clearly says he did not expect the festive drink to have as much of a kick as it did. "Fuck, that's strong. It's like, 10% egg and 90%... nog? Is that part supposed to mean the alcohol? Why the hell is it called that..." He proceeds to laugh at himself, at least self-aware enough to realize how stupid he sounds, meandering back towards the the real party. But... he decides to linger in the open doorway, leaning back against the wall and turning his gaze towards Fitz again. The kitchen is mostly empty, the kitchen is nice. Lights hang in the window above the sink, the music is softer, and for the first time in a long while... the looming presence of the winter holidays feels a little lighter.

Fitz meets him in the doorway, and Michael almost asks if they should just stay in there, when it becomes clear that he's seen something that Michael hasn't, from the raised brows and slightly-tilted smile ( contained, but amused, also intoxicated ). "What? Do I have nog on my face?" Michael comments, before finally glancing upwards... and then he sees it. Oh.

It's a small garland of mistletoe, hung over the doorway ( a real one— not the mass-produced material with bear faces drawn into the berries that still sits in his fucking home ), and Michael is speechless for a moment. How did he not see that? It's obvious, and as stupid as plenty of other hollow traditions ( he has hazy memories of his parents getting caught under the thing in their living room, when they actually seemed in love... ). No one is watching them, nothing holds them to the garland's silent demands. That thought only makes Michael realize it's all the more reason to follow it. Plus, this isn't foreign to them. They're, well... they're something— they haven't really talked about it. "Well? Can't hurt, right..."

Their lips meet in a rush of heat against the chill, winter air, flooding to his face and flaring through his chest with the stuttering pace of his pulse. Neither of them are entirely steady, the kiss has the subtle taste of alcohol and vanilla, and despite himself, Michael melts into the affection. Eyes still shut, the kiss deepens. He finds Fitz's clothing and intertwines his fingers with the fabric, pulling closer ( the small action, absent of usual hesitance, admits more than he ever says out loud ). A low, content noise hums at the back of his throat, and they break away only for needed air. That might be the most romantic fucking thing he's ever done. He'll blame the dizziness on the alcohol. He almost wants to say something, but more than that, he doesn't want to ruin it, so he just smiles instead, finding Fitz's hand to brush against his own.

[surveysand]

fifty-one.

Do you wear lipgloss, lipstick, chapstick or nothing at all? i wear chapstick frequently. i use lipstick and lipgloss on rare occasions.

What’s one thing that has pissed you off in the past five days? issues with making payments for my new apartment.

Do you say ‘flexible’ or ‘bendy’? flexible. i only use "bendy" when talking about straws, lol.

Are you wearing a belt right now? no.

Are your feet propped up on something? no.

Do you worry about things that aren’t your responsibility? yes.

How often do you say ‘ain’t’ or ‘y’all’? i say "y'all" frequently, but use "ain't" much less frequently.

Can you do a cartwheel somewhere in your house and not hit anything? yes.

Are your eyes wide, narrow or in between? in between.

Are you currently tired? If so, why? yes. i got drunk last night and fell asleep at a weird time, so i woke up around three am and haven't fallen back asleep yet. also, just haven't felt very good (physically or mentally) the past few days.

Have you seen the movie Avatar? If so, did you like it? Why or why not? no.

Do you know someone who has been kidnapped? no.

What have you sacrificed in the past year? my mental health just so i could graduate.

Do you state the obvious frequently? yes, lol.

Have you ever told someone that it would be better if they killed themself? no.

Are you emotionally sensitive? yes, though i put a guard up so others don't know.

What’s in your pockets, if anything? i don't have pockets.

Do you own a watch? i have an apple watch, but i never wear it. oops.

How do you feel when people talk about you as if you’re not in the room? annoyed. like, i'm right here.

Do you own a knife? for my kitchen, yes.

What’s your favourite vowel? a.

Aren’t cupcakes just basically mini cakes? Why not call them mini cakes instead?! but they're called cupcakes because they fit in a little cup. that's so cute, lol.

Have you ever told your parents to shut up before? yes, but only as a joke, lol.

Do you tend to correct people? yes.

What’s the stupidest thing that you have lied about? i've lied to uber drivers about what i do for a living, lol. it's fun to just make up non-harmful stuff to people who wouldn't know otherwise.

How many necklaces do you own? one.

Have you ever been to Forever 21? yes.

Have you ever tasted glue? no.

When’s the last time you inflicted pain upon yourself? a few weeks ago when i burned my finger while cooking.

Cruise ship or sail boat? cruise ship, though i hate both.

Do you know every word to the song you hate most? no.

Where were you at this time three days ago? in my apartment.

How do you take out your anger? crying then sleeping.

Have you ever woken up and your arms were sore, but you didn’t know why? yes. i sleep on them weird sometimes, i think.

Your name, list two different ways to spell it. i only know of one way (which i won't post for privacy reasons).

Do you prefer fridges with vertical doors? yes.

Are visitors allowed to smoke in your house? no.

What, about the economy, bothers you most? inflation.

Have you ever said ‘off the chain’? yes.

Do you put fruit in your cereal? i sometimes put bananas in cheerios.

Lime green lights or orange lights? lime green.

[clairethecutepup]

Writing Practice: On the Run! (Ed Edd n' Eddy)

Writing is always important in media-- whether standard literature or otherwise --and thus it's important I sharpen my writing skills whenever possible, by both doing it and examining feedback.

Today's offered story, whether you plan to critique or simply enjoy, is a tale done in style of 2nd person narration and fanfiction form. Be warned, it has mentions of strong depression and all; but it's nothing overtly dark and gritty-- not even SLIGHTLY. Click "read more" to view, as well as the author's notes.

[*Note: all the characters are aged up and adults now, even if it's a simple 18 years of age. Nothing "inappropriate" for that reason, just a preference.]

Normally, Claire (You) gets along quite well with Sarah and Jimmy; but they won't hesitate to criticize the kid, when warranted-- or give chase, when most certainly warranted!

Claire promised the two she'd ditch the BCAA supplements, after seeming like she'd come close to a heart attack and getting a bit sick. Unfortunately, Claire is too determined to maintain her muscular gains and force her body to find the instant energy to do things. Plus, a third reason... The two have their suspicions, and when they find out... Well, if Claire's fine with harming herself, Sarah's eager to help; and Jimmy doesn't very much enjoy others acting like they're smarter than him, so he'd also like teaching Claire a lesson in being cocky enough to try and play him a fool.

****

You're in your bedroom, and you've secretly popped another BCAA pill for your latest workout. When you finish, your heart is still racing from the caffeinated substance you took. Hopefully, no one notices. Skyler then knocks on your door and tells you that he's going shopping for some more art supplies and groceries. You can go with him, or you can stay in the Cul-De-Sac. Obviously, he's not letting you stay by yourself, as you're not the type of person to be entrusted with their own well-being. You don't feel like walking around, after feeling the BCAA's strong effects on your body, so you ask to be left behind and in someone else's care. Skyler agrees to your demands, but with the question if it's because you don't feel well. You certainly don't look it...

Darn, if only you could do a better job of hiding your BCAA influence... It's a lot harder, when you've lost your tolerance to it, after going cold turkey for so long. Skyler asks Nazz to watch you for a bit, and she agrees. When you're at Nazz's place, you accept the offer to lie on her couch for a bit, after you show clear signs of feeling unwell.

Nazz leaves the room to get something for you, before she comes back into the living room. She sets down a plate of cookies and a glass of milk, before sitting beside you.

"This always helps me feel better, whenever I'm feeling sick myself," she smiles.

Guess that made one of you, as you could only cover your mouth instinctively. This only increases her concern, and she feels your forehead.

"Hmmm... You don't feel warm," she removes her hand, "Do you feel like you caught a bug or something?"

You shake your head, assuring you just feel tired after your workout.

"Dude, that's why they say to take 'rest days,'" she reminds, "Well, you can at least rest NOW. I'll leave the tray for you, okay?"

You watch her leave and internally sigh to yourself. Darn it, the BCAA pills were supposed to INCREASE energy, not make you bed-ridden! ... Or, couch-ridden, instead. You decide to eat the cookies anyway, since they're there. They taste pretty good, and you even manage to finish all of them, without any problems.

You then fall asleep, on the couch, while watching cartoons. You wake up in your own bed, and there's a damp cloth on your forehead. You stand up and leave your room, encountering Skyler in your kitchen.

"Oh, you're up," Skyler immediately takes notice, concern on his face, "Are you alright, Claire? Nazz says you were sleeping the entire time you were there, like you absolutely had no energy left... Plus, you seemed nauseous at the idea of eating."

You shrug, claiming you probably overworked yourself with your strength training. This furrows Skyler's brow.

"Claire," he says, "this isn't the first time that's been happening, lately... So, what exactly are you doing during those exercises? Whatever it is, I think you need to take a break from it, or at least use lighter weights..."

You nod in agreement, hoping he doesn't catch onto the pills being the real reason. You finally have more of an appetite, at least what wasn't ruined by Nazz's cookies, so you eat the dinner Skyler prepared. You lie awake that night, unable to sleep because of the pills' caffeine content and your lengthy daytime nap earlier. It's a tired morning the next day, so time to pop more BCAA pills. There's the energy boost, but with a hint of nausea. Oh well, it's been getting less intense. You greet Skyler for the morning, and he says he'd like to get you some fresh air today. Perhaps that'll help with your newfound and seeming sickness? At the playground, a passing Sarah and Jimmy notice you both. Specifically, Sarah and Jimmy focus on YOU, as they heard from Nazz that you weren't seeming of the best health yesterday. You assure them you're fine, just that you may be working yourself too hard with muscle-building.

Jimmy asks if you're sure, and you reply with a simple "yes." Something about your response doesn't seem acceptable to him. Then again, Jimmy could be manipulative at times, so it wouldn't be surprising if something about your false answer reminded him of his own lies, here and there.

"You seem a bit unwell, still..." he notes, "Did you also work out today?"

You deny it, your only truthful response, thus far. Jimmy is scanning your face. He then asks Skyler if he and Sarah can take you off his hands, and Skyler doesn't see much reason to object. He just asks that they ensure to keep a close eye on you, in case your state worsens. You don't like where this is going, as Jimmy leads you away by the shoulder. Sarah is suspicious, as she walks alongside you. She can tell when Jimmy's planning something, and it's clear you've given him something to plan about. Jimmy leads you both into one of the alleyways, before he stops and leans into your ear.

"You're trying to pull one over me, aren't you~?" he smirks, "I know you all too well, you know."

Wuh oh... You deny it.

"You think you're smarter than me, don't you?" his smile grows and looks a bit annoyed, "Perhaps even egotistical enough to think yourself smarter than ALL of us, since I've a feeling you've been a bit untruthful to Skyler, as well."

You insist you really don't know what he's talking about, you probably just got a bug or something...

"Oh Claire, those adorable blue eyes can betray you so easily~," Jimmy continues, "I'm willing to be forgiving, though, if you tell me what you're actually doing to make yourself so sick lately."

Sarah glances between you two, confusion on her face.

"Jimmy, what are you two talking about...?" she asks.

"Oh, how stupid she thinks we both are," Jimmy confidently responds, "it's why she won't tell us what's REALLY sickening her, as of late."

"... What's THAT supposed to mean?" Sarah fiercely stares you down, "Claire, ARE you hiding something...? Whatever it is, you better tell us RIGHT NOW..."

You back into the fence lining, as Jimmy smugly and calmly approaches you, and Sarah angrily and fiercely does.

"It's nothing, guys!" you protest, "Just some minor stomach problems, that's all! It's not anything bad, okay? Just... a little stomach bug, maybe..."

"'Maybe'?" Jimmy smugly repeats, "You don't sound so sure. I suggest the canary sings, before I have to introduce the cat to it," he motions to Sarah.

Well, they're gonna find out anyway, now. Good thing you carried the pill bottle for any emergency "energy" and the like, so maybe it can distract them long enough...? With a shaky hand and strong gulp, you hand over the bottle and Sarah snatches it from you. She and Jimmy both look at it, and they seem furious.

"WHAT?!" Sarah yells, "You've been taking this stuff again?!"

"Oh, so you truly DO think you're smarter than us, don't you?" Jimmy snarls, "Why else would you have apparently kept your fingers crossed, when you promised us all you'd stop taking these...? Well, I DON'T like being played for a fool..."

"ME NEITHER!" Sarah pushes her sleeve up, as Jimmy takes the bottle, "Claire, I'm gonna--!!"

While they focused on the bottle, you ran off.

"Oh, you ARE a cheeky little cad!" Jimmy grits his teeth, "Acting sneaky a SECOND time..."

"That's it, GET BACK HERE!!" Sarah yells.

You run for your life, as you flee the taller adults. Sarah is probably going to LITERALLY tear you limb from limb, while Jimmy would certainly make you squirm in other manners... You're pretty sure you wouldn't survive either of their wraths. Unfortunately, you couldn't even hide away at home, as Skyler would undoubtedly be told about this. Guess you'd best just run away from the Cul-De-Sac altogether... if that's somehow possible.

You quickly dart around corners, trying to lose the two larger figures chasing after you. They're gaining on you, though...

"YOU'RE NOT GETTING AWAY THAT EASY!" Sarah shouts, "WE'VE CHASED MY BROTHER AND HIS FRIENDS DOWN ALL THESE YEARS, AND YOU WON'T BE ANY DIFFERENT!!"

You'd like to beg to differ. You had shorter legs, but you're pretty quick yourself. A smaller size also meant you can fit into and squeeze through things easier than them. In fact, you could easily slip under the fence... So, you do.

"It'll take more than that, you slippery weasel!" Jimmy calls out.

Sarah and Jimmy's hands follow you under the hole, but their fingers don't even come close to grasping you. You run toward the side of the oncoming house and past it. Now, you need to decide which direction to head in, preferably one the duo won't use to catch up. You don't want to bump into them. You decide to just hide in a nearby bush, for now, just to be safe. You'll see which way they're coming from and, more importantly, which way they'll be going. They eventually reach the spot, but they don't see you in the bush.

"Sarah, let's check the park," Jimmy suggests, "she may have gone running back to her trusted sibling for safety. Well, she'd only be half right, knowing what a foolish simpleton she can be..."

"Fine by me," Sarah agrees, "Let's see her sneak anymore, if Skyler finds out himself!"

The two of them run down the street, but then turn left at the corner.

Oh, thank goodness, they're gone now... Well, if they're telling Skyler-- whether him actually still being at the park, or him being found back home --then that confirms the idea of dismissing your home as a hiding spot. Well, you're officially "on the run"... You're worried how quickly word may spread about the search for you, and your continued use of BCAA supplements. You gotta be careful about encountering the other Cul-De-Sac members. At the very least, you know you can't hide in here forever: bushes are probably among the first things they'd check, and Ed could literally sniff you out. His likelihood of it is only increased, by the bush being near his home. You temporarily humor the idea of hiding in Ed's, and Sarah's, own home. It WOULD be the last place they'd expect to find you. Unfortunately, there's the whole "Ed sniffing you out" thing, and you're too scared to be THAT close to a furious and seeking Sarah. Ugh, where to go now?

Your options are limited. Double D isn't a good choice, because he'd likely tell Skyler about all this, too. If only you had a different problem, then he'd help fix everything, as per usual. The Cul-De-Sac clubhouse is not a good choice either, as Sarah and Jimmy would definitely think to examine an empty, isolated treetop space like that. That leaves... the outskirts of the Cul-De-Sac, you guessed. Great, even if you somehow managed to get out of the neighborhood, you didn't have any real place to hide and survive in. Honestly, you'd have better luck jumping out of the clubhouse and praying it's quick. Okay, a bit TOO dark and dramatic a solution, in THIS case, but you're essentially screwed either way; yet, you'll be even more so, if Sarah and Jimmy manage to get hold of you.

You're just going to have to keep moving. Maybe try heading towards the woods, and hope for the best; or maybe you should just hide somewhere and make everyone THINK you fled elsewhere...? But how long do you wait, before the inevitability of having to run instead? Do you risk being caught and attempt to flee without being seen, in the current moment? And if you do try to escape, what happens when you encounter someone else? How many people do you have to worry about running into on the way out...?

Well, you've got to make a decision soon. Your phone is ringing, and it's Skyler's name on that screen. Sarah and Jimmy must've told him, and he's likely FURIOUS about things. You can already hear him telling you to come to him-- and NOW. You decide to just turn off your phone. Sure, ignoring him isn't going to ease his temper, but it'll be harder to locate you with a quiet phone that can't emit a trackable GPS signal, at least. You decide to find a new place to hide, at least one that'll take them longer to search. You gotta sneak out of the Cul-De-Sac eventually, though.

You slip away from the bush, careful to stay hidden in the shadows. There's no one around, which means you don't have to worry about anyone seeing you leave. You're also pretty small and quiet, so that'll help keep you under everyone's radar.

You glance around, trying to avoid seeming suspicious as you walk. If Sarah, Jimmy or Skyler spot you, they'll chase you down. Still, you should avoid getting spotted by anyone else, as you don't know whom else Sarah and Jimmy told to keep an eye out for you. Your legs start to tire, a sure sign you're experiencing a BCAA-related crash, again. Great, why NOW of all times? As much as you want to keep going, your body feels too heavy; but you prevail, even when Sarah and Jimmy took your only pill bottle of the energy-booster.

Then, the last thing you'd want happens: someone acknowledges you. Fortunately, it's not your brother nor your pursuing duo, but Nazz spots you regardless. Kevin is with her, and he's also eyeing you. It doesn't seem like they've been told anything, as they're not trying to grab you nor telling you to come over to them.

"Claire, are you alright?" Nazz asks, "What are you even doing alone? I thought Skyler didn't like it when you were."

Normally, people would think Skyler abusively possessive when hearing he doesn't like you alone, but Skyler's true motives are pure: only wanting to ensure you're given personal care that you can't be trusted to do for yourself. Hopefully, he believed, that would change, someday. Knowing Skyler's reason for it, Nazz would predictably be concerned to see you all alone. Crap, how do you lie here?

You assure them everything's fine, you just felt a need to give Sarah and Jimmy some space, after a falling-out.

Kevin looks at you with curiosity and concern, "'Wait, YOU storming off from someone, just like that...?" he asks, "Even if it WAS a real doozy, why would they just agree to let you walk off like that? They know how Skyler feels about that better than anyone..."

Nazz also seems upset, "Dude, if they agreed to watch you for him, then they NEED to stick with you," Nazz approaches you and holds her hand out, "Come on, let's go find them and we'll help settle things, o--" she confusedly watches you back away, "--kay...? Dude, you're acting really weird here. Like, there's more than just some fight happening between you guys."

You assure it won't be a good idea to find them right now.

"Um, then we can just wait for them to look for YOU instead...?" Nazz suggests.

Oh no, you can't let anyone hang onto you, you just can't!! You won't get out of here then! You lie about going back to Sarah and Jimmy, and run off. Nazz calls after you, but you ignore her and flee in whatever direction seems likeliest for escape.

As soon as you're out of sight of their sight, your legs start shaking from fear as you realize this plan might have been stupid. Your heart is racing so hard, your breath is short... And you feel like throwing up. Why did you ever think running away was such a great idea?! Those stupid BCAA side effects aren't helping, either... Where ARE you now, anyway? Wait, trailers? You're in the trailer park! You hope you don't run into the Kanker Sisters, as they'll probably ask why you're running around in some sickly panic. It wouldn't be the first time one would ask if a problem needed help being "finished," and you KNOW how easy it is to anger them with something like lying. Actually, maybe Sarah tearing you a new one instead-- even with Jimmy to add something into the mix --isn't all that scary, with competition like THAT.

You don't know if the Kankers would actually tell Skyler, or at least hand you over to Sarah and Jimmy, but you feel it's best not to get caught by them. You hear the sisters and instinctively dive under the nearest trailer: theirs. Yet, you don't see them anywhere, and it sounds a little muffled. You curiously follow it to the slightly opened window. That's the reason you hear them: they're inside, with the Eds, and all seem to be enjoying each other's company. Oh, great... If the Eds are here, that's definitely gonna complicate things, if you're noticed. Double D would especially screw you over, by returning you to Skyler (likely including Sarah and Jimmy), if he and the others managed to get the truth out of you. Time to go, before they spot you and ask any questions... Speaking of "complications": Sarah and Jimmy are prowling through the area, gazing around for you. Luckily, you spot them first and hide under the trailer again. You cover your mouth and hope they don't look under it and spot you. Their feet stop in front of the gap you're hiding in.

"She has to be around here, somewhere, Jimmy..." Sarah growls, "How far can an idiot with shorter legs run, anyway?"

"And, a SMALLER fool, as well, Sarah..." Jimmy adds, "She has many spots and the like she can squeeze into. We need to make sure we're as thorough as possible. We also best keep any noise down, so we don't risk alerting her to our presence."

A bit late for that, you can literally see them, in addition to hearing them. Still, as long as they don't know where exactly you are, maybe they'll lose interest in searching this area, eventually. You hope so. You're watching Jimmy and Sarah search the park's yard... Oh crap, they're looking UNDER trailers now, and they're about to look under the Kankers'!!

Just as they're kneeling down, Lee kicks the trailer door open.

"Okay, just what are you two doing out here?" she demands, pointing inside with a thumb, "We can all see you obsessing over every little detail out here, through the window..." she lowers her thumb, folding her arms, "You lose something, or you just trying to bug the neighbors? Trust me, last thing we need's you two setting off ol' Carl, over there."

"Have you seen Claire?" Sarah demands.

"The little blonde twerp; why, she in trouble or something?"

"You bet she is! She's been lying about not taking that stupid BCAA stuff anymore!"

"So? If it's her body, it's her choice, ain't it? If something happens to her, it's her own fault."

"She better hopes it makes something happen to her, before we find her, 'cause when I get my hands on that lying little...!! Did you see her, or not?!"

"Calm down, we haven't seen the squirt anywhere near here."

You feel a lump in your throat, but you dare not swallow and let the sound give you away to everyone. Too late, Jimmy just peered under the trailer.

"I found the slippery rascal, Sarah!!"

Jimmy dives in under you, but you back out quickly and take off in the direction that the trailer's backside faces. Sarah and Jimmy look past the trailer and toward you.

"You're making it a whole lot worse!!" Sarah snarls.

"Jeez, those three are sometimes crazier than our men..." Lee sighs.

She goes back inside the trailer, likely to relay the insane shenanigans of your own trio, just now. You run as Sarah and Jimmy follow, and continue yelling at you, while they chase you into Rolf's farm yard. You burst through the fence gate, Jimmy pushes the door open next, and Sarah LITERALLY smashes through the darn thing after it recloses.

Rolf instantly snaps his surprised attention toward the three of you, as you all run around his moving tractor. He's yelling at you all to not foolishly stand in front of his moving vehicle; while you're more focused on escaping your pursuers, and Sarah and Jimmy are more focused on catching you.

You're running all throughout Rolf's yard, much to his vocal dismay. Your latest dodge attempt of Sarah and Jimmy lands you onto Rolf's goat, Victor, and the critter carries you to freedom. Forget being on the "lamb" instead... Rolf yells at you to return his goat, but you don't really have much choice: Victor is freaked out and charging forward, with you riding on his back. Jimmy is riding someone else himself, for extra speed: Sarah, and spite/anger is motivating her to run at a very fast rate after you. She's clearly HAD it with chasing you every which way, as if it wasn't bad enough you lied to her and Jimmy.

You plow into a passing Jonny, who only had a few moments to notice Victor charging toward him. You fly off the goat, as the two fall onto the ground, and you suddenly find yourself traveling by the air. Well, that's one way to flee the Cul-De-Sac, even if you have no idea where to. Sarah and Jimmy aren't deterred, though, they're running toward where they believe you'll land. You eventually land in the trees of the nearby forest. You slide through the branches and land onto the ground. You quickly regain yourself and run, having a strong feeling that's not the last you'll be seeing of your pursuers, given how relentless your two friends can get.

The sun sets, and the sky turns dark. You're still running, but now you're lost in the woods, somewhat. You've been running for a while, and you're exhausted. You need to find somewhere to rest, and soon.

*****

It's gotten so dark outside, and you're still alone in the woods. You can barely see anything, and you're worried you'll stumble upon some weird creep or something, all the way out here and so late. You try to keep going, but you're too tired to move any farther.

Jeez, just how long have you been travelling for? Wouldn't Sarah and Jimmy have caught up to you by now? Then again, maybe they made a mistake in predicting your landing location, or these woods proved too vast for even the year-long residents to navigate effectively.

You sit down on a log, and lean against it. Your body is so sore from all the running, and you're starting to feel sick. You should have just stayed off those stupid supplements, then this whole thing would've never happened! Your heart won't stop racing, you've got a headache now-- because stress ALWAYS makes a BCAA-induced crash all the better! --and you're more exhausted than ever. You're also starving, but good luck eating anything with the increased nausea.

Still, your stomach growls, and you realize you haven't eaten since breakfast today. That was a bad decision, and you know it. Now you're paying the price-- paying the price for it ALL. You sigh, and look around. There's nothing here, and you don't think there's anywhere to sleep, either. Maybe you could curl up under a tree and wait until morning? It's a good thing the Summer air isn't all that cold, even during the night.

Suddenly, you hear a rustling sound. Something is moving in the bushes. You freeze, and listen intently.

"CLAIRE, YOU FATHEADED JERK!!!" Sarah's voice roars.

She goes flying from the foliage-- RIGHT TOWARD YOU!! She hits you like a cannon ball. She doesn't just hit you with her body, but her fists. Your tired body can only think to hold up its arms defensively.

"That's it, Sarah!" Jimmy emerges from the bush and hurries over, standing over you, "Give her the ol', 'One-Two' punch!" he then kneels beside you, during your received assault, "If you think THIS is bad, just wait until you see what I have in store for you afterward, you troublesome cad..."

Eventually, Sarah feels satisfied and she's unleashed all of her pent up rage that you caused. You lie on the ground, sobbing. You're not crying because Sarah battered and bruised you, but from the stress of EVERYTHING that happened today and what was to come: Jimmy's brand of retribution, Skyler undoubtedly waiting to ground you, the stress of being chased down by Sarah and Jimmy, the physical distress caused by your supplements, and so forth. Sarah sighs and sits beside you, while Jimmy sits across from her and on your other side. You continue sobbing, and you're not the ONLY saddened one: Sarah actually had teary eyes this entire time, and Jimmy also appears upset.

"Oh, be quiet..." Sarah huffs, "You don't have anyone to blame, but yourself... Just... Why do you do this to us?! Don't we ALREADY have to worry about losing you, when you're not popping some stupid pills that we told you not to?! Just because YOU don't care about yourself, doesn't mean no one else cares whether you're dead or not!"

A tad ironic to give a spiel about your well-being, seeing as she's why you're more bruised than a dropped apple. Then again, you can't exactly bring yourself to blame her, though.

"I'm sorry," you whimper, "I never wanna upset you guys, or the others..."

"Well, you did!" Sarah snaps back, "You do, every time you decide to do something that can or does end up hurting you! For crying out loud, is it so hard to ask that you LISTEN to us, for once?!"

"But I-"

"Enough of your empty words, Missy!" Jimmy shouts, "It's clear you simply can't be trusted with anything, whatsoever! No wonder Skyler asks for help in watching you, like the hapless infant you are!"

"But what good's HIS concern-- or ours, I guess --when you ALWAYS just throw it back in our faces?!" Sarah growls, "And for what: just for some slightly bigger muscles, or because naps are CLEARLY too hard for you to do? It's called, 'protein' and 'coffee,' you idiot!! It's not like those stupid pills are your only option!"

"I-I'm sorry," you sob, "th-they just seemed so faster and more effective..."

"Yes, at inducing cardiac arrest!" Jimmy huffs, "Or, have you forgotten about your gasping and chest-clutching that one time? I can't believe you'd be fine with scaring us a second time, in such a devastating manner!"

"Honestly, Claire," Sarah huffs, "why do we even bother with you, sometimes?! It seems like no matter what we do, you're just intent on doing whatever you can to get some kind of early grave..."

"No, i-it wasn't done for the sake of self-harm," you plead, "I-I really liked the effects BCAA had on my body... You know I like to be masculine, like large muscles..."

"Yeah, but it still counts when you don't care that something IS hurting you!" Sarah snarls.

"Besides," Jimmy adds, "we all know you'd consider a potential, life-ending heart attack as another 'bonus' from your precious BCAA's, wouldn't you?"

You go back to sobbing, as you can't deny the risk of heart failure as another pill "advantage," over the likes of coffee or protein drinks.

"So, why do you keep going back to this nonsense, then?" Jimmy demands, "Why do you think we should waste any further time with you, Claire? Why do you think we should give you ANY consideration, ever again, when it'll apparently be for naught, and everything said completely ignored by you?"

You fall silent, as you have no answer. Why SHOULD anyone be concerned about you or try to dissuade you from self-destruction, if you can't bring about any concern for your own self and life? No matter how good you currently have it, your mind always reminds you why you deserve to die and that it's probably better for you, over all.

You'd just be ticking timebomb for anyone who got invested in you. You likely could only offer someone eventual grief in the end. You sniffle, defeatedly staring at your toes, as you lie on your back.

"... I suppose the answer is that we've gotten too attached, to just let you go NOW." Jimmy finally sighs, "A foolish reason, when we could learn to just cut ties and move on from such madness; but a reason, nonetheless."

"Yeah..." Sarah agrees, resting her chin in a hand, "Besides, you always stick by US, even when I end up falling back into old habits myself..." she overlooks your bruises, hoping she hadn't roughed you up too badly, "We'd be a real set of fatheads, if we expected you to be there for US when we needed it, but we just threw YOU away when YOU'RE the miserable one..." She furrows her brow, "But enough's enough, got it?! It's high time you take your health and everything more seriously, and that starts by not letting this stupid brain of yours--" she presses a finger into your forehead, "--hold you back from enjoying life and convince you to make stupid choices."

"But, I'm not sure I can change," you whimper, "M-Maybe it would be better, if you guys just forg--"

"--I'm afraid of being someone that can't change, either, Claire..." Sarah sighs, "Most of my life, my parents spoiled me and let me turn into a real... Jeez, I don't even know if a 'C-U-Next-Tuesday' is the right word for it. But, you don't see ME welcoming death and thinking the whole place'd be better for it!" She crosses her arms, "Of course, it's something I had to decide on myself, since no one else could make me want to change. It's the same for you, Claire: we can't force you to do anything. We can't make you feel differently about yourself, or stop you from wanting to hurt yourself. Only you can do that, Claire."

"And, if you don't want to change," Jimmy adds, "then there's nothing we can do to help you. If you choose to continue down this path, then we might actually have to find the strength to say goodbye, before we have to say our farewells in a more painful and morbid manner..." He looks at you, "It's obvious you're of regrets, Claire, and you don't want to repeat them. That's enough of a reason for someone to try and change themselves for the better. So, if you have the reason to want change, why not take it then?"

"It doesn't erase what I've done, though..." You sniffle, "It doesn't even fix those problems..."

"So, quit worrying about it, then!" Sarah huffs, "You just said there's nothing you can do about it all anymore, so why worry about it like it's some current problem you have to solve? You just said, you can't actually 'fix' things anymore!"

"Well, yes..." You frown, "But, I still need to face up to my mistakes, somehow..."

"Then, you should do whatever you can and make amends," Jimmy says, "If you can't undo them, then you can at least apologize for them. And, if you can't apologize, then you can at least make peace with them. Maybe, if you can't forgive them, then maybe you can at least forget them."

"That's easier said than done," you sigh, "especially when it's bad to just 'forget,' 'cause then you do it again."

"Clearly, I mean 'forget' in the sense of evading self-torment, than in a literal sense..." Jimmy rolls his eyes, "Then again, you CAN be of a simpler mind, so I suppose I WOULD need to be more specific."

"But how do you remember, without rightfully tormenting yourself?" You ask.

"I'm not sure that's something Sarah and I can explain to you," Jimmy says, "but I think you should just focus on doing what you can, instead of dwelling on what you can't. It's not like you can go back in time and fix anything, just as Sarah said. All you can do is move forward from here, and hope for the best."

"What if I mess up, though?" You ask.

"Then, you'll learn from your mistake, and hopefully, you won't repeat it," Jimmy replies, "Now, let's go back home. Skyler's likely concerned about you. Hopefully, he won't mind the roughness you invited from Sarah... Then again, she likely did you a favor, as perhaps he won't punish you himself, if Sarah already took care of that~," he then slyly smiles, "But, you'll still have MY retribution to face, regardless."

Speaking of her, the redhead carries you back, bridal style, and Jimmy walks beside you both.

"Hey..." Sarah faintly whispers, "Just remember that we love you, okay...? I also need your help, if I'm going to change for the better myself. It's harder to beat the snot out of everything and scream up a storm, if you're there to be scared by it, y'know. I'll help you be better, if you keep helping me."

"O-Okay..." you sniffle.

You're too tired to do much else, and just lay in her arms. They can tell, and smile at your drifting state.

"Good night, Claire," Sarah says softly, "Sleep tight."

You nod and let your head hang afterward.

"Sweet dreams, Claire," Jimmy says.

You feel him pet your head. You don't really recall much else of that night, as you fell fast asleep; but hopefully, things would be better tomorrow-- including your abilities at maintaining promises.

{The End}

-----

Author's notes:

I'll admit, I practiced using Novel AI for this; however, ONLY for the rough draft, not the final version you see before you-- and even then, I only turned to the AI whenever I had no idea what to write next. Let me make something perfectly clear: you are no less of a writer nor creator, if you utilize an AI's help. Now, if you're trying to pass off work COMPLETELY done by an AI as your own, you're definitely worthy of personal shame and indeed a failure then.

I mean, Novel AI is designed to help out writers, like me, right? So, why not see what inspiration I can work off of, or even let it include a sentence or two that actually fits well? Trust me, though, when I say you still gotta worry about characters acting like themselves and talking like themselves, or other things an AI can't replicate as well. So, yeah, don't be afraid to use AI tools, just don't go around claiming the work as entirely your own.

Also, this is NOT the same Claire you may be used to: the small girl that's a wolf-hybrid. No, this is an alternate Claire. This is also the version of Claire that'll be replicated in the "Assassin AU" fan comic series of EEnE I'm planning. Hey, practice goes beyond just the art of making words form a coherent story. So, yeah, hope you enjoyed, those of you simply looking for an EEnE fan fiction. And, hope you found something to speak on, if you felt a need to let your inner critic out instead. Hopefully, this can also encourage others to take a shine to my means of writing, 'cause I AM planning on creating comics, and thus involve a LOT of writing.

----

OTHER writing practices:

Seaside Squabbles! (Digimon)

[theboardwalkbody]

Me, a younger millennial, used to housing prices for a 3bd 1ba 1000sqft house built in the 1950s or earlier and never renovated being a starting minimum of 750,000 dollars: *sees a 4bd, 2ba 1200sqft house with updates and an inground pool listed for 550,000*

My first reaction: omg maybe housing prices are coming down! Maybe I will be able to afford a house one day!

My second reaction: .... Ok what's wrong with it why is it so much less than the average price for the area?

Boomers and older Gen-Xers: HAHA this is a joke, right? 550,000 is way too much for that sized home you have horrible business practices, it'll never sell.

That's how out of touch they are. They're freaking out about a house being listed 200,000 under average for the area and saying it's too much.

It is too much. That price is still too high for that sized home, yes.

But it goes to show that so many of them still think houses are listing at 150,000 to 300,000 because that's what they got THEIR homes for and they never have needed to look for a new place to live at all in the last several years.

My grandma and grandpa purchased the land and built the house on it (the land was put up for collateral). They built a 3bd 1ba ranch style home. It has an unfinished basement, a rough (barely floored) attic, a one car garage, and they added a den on the back off the living room. It's on a quarter acre of property. They spent 20,000.

20,000

Homes in our neighborhood, with all roughly the same attributes, are going for 750,000 to 850,000. Add taxes on that. I'm not good with math but I'm sure you're looking at, if not sightly over, 1mil.

1 million dollars for a house held together with duct tape (I'm not even joking) because it hasn't been kept up with since my grandfather passed away in the 70s. Original outdated layout, original electric (half the rooms only have two prong outlets), original metal plumbing (hopefully not lead but idk what was used in 1958) instead of the now standard PVC, and a bunch of 60yr old tree roots eating into the plumbing outside.

Oh and property taxes? If you wanted to pay less than 15,000 a year in property taxes this isn't the town for you. Because it's a "commuter" town! It's got trains and ferries and buses and two elementary schools and two middle schools and two high schools and it's only an hour from NYC and Philly and Atlantic City and 5 minutes from the beach!

But 15k apparently can't fix the pot holes. It can build a brand new police station and town hall, however! Oh, and it also can't keep the library operating for more than like 6 hours a day in the summer.

We have a bunch of abandoned stores. Most of them food joints/restaurants. But we keep on building banks, for some reason. Every time a bank gets built another retail place (or two mom and pop shops) die.

So 20,000 to 1mil.

How?

And the fun thing? The layout (and 1 bathroom thing) is outdated and no longer functional for the modern family. There's 5 adults living in the house. We're CONSTANTLY fighting for the bathroom. The kitchen is small and if you want to not feel claustrophobic then you can be the ONLY one in the kitchen. Otherwise it's just too tight. We had to swap the dining room and the living room around because the dining room table, made for 6 people, didn't fit in the dining room they had built. My bedroom doubles as an office because there's no space to put it elsewhere, computers didn't exist when the house was designed. The den doubles as my parents' office. The basement is storage AND a pantry because the "pantry" in the kitchen is a foot wide, a foot deep, and 6ft high. It really doesn't fit much. Some of our kitchen cookware is on a shelf in the laundry room because there's not enough cabinet space. The original wall oven is, well, falling out of the wall. The door doesn't shut all the way so heat leaks from it and the cabinet above it is singed from years of heat leakage on to it.

But to update it to be a little more functional? To knock down a wall to make the bedrooms a foot wider and add a bathroom and make the kitchen a little bigger? To bring the plumbing, electric, and heat/AC up to a functional level for 2023?

400,000 dollars.

Which is STILL more than the cost of a whole entire house back when boomers and older genXers bought their homes.

400,000 dollars being half the estimated cost of what the house would sell for.

So it's kinda at a point where they're like, why bother spending that much money and why not just sell it and get something already fixed up?

But who can afford either option?

[thatbassistbitch]

hi milo i am here to say i would also like to hear more about racoon science boy tommy au <3

well the au itself isn't specifically about artificial shifter tommy, he's just one facet of it. however! i think you'll be delighted to know how he and techno form their bond. you see, when wilbur first brought tommy home, phil and techno were less than pleased. wilbur had been cleaning out the guest room, his excuse being that he wanted to have a friend over sometime soon. what they did not know is that by friend, he meant new legal little brother. techno does not like abrupt change. it scares him, though he refuses to admit it and instead calls it an inconvenience. techno is all about good change! if he can control his place in it. but new little brother? now he is no longer the little brother. Upsetting. so when he sees wilbur carry in a wide-eyed, bushy-tailed kid and sets him loose in the living room, proudly displaying legal documents and promising an entire bedroom to this strange new child, techno is far from happy about this development. especially as tommy skids into his stack of books and knocks it over. phil and wilbur have a row over it in the kitchen, leaving techno to deal with tommy on his own. tommy is loud, he finds. very loud. and annoying. and just plain weird. where the hell did wilbur even find this kid? how did he forge these documents? why havent any social workers questioned this? what the hell is going on here? tommy snatches an apple off the table with a curious chitter and sinks his little teeth into it, crouching on the floor like a gremlin as he gets juice everywhere, and techno scoots his chair away so he can at least pretend to focus on his homework. he'll be in highschool with wilbur soon, he doesn't need to deal with all of this.

phil and wilbur come back out of the kitchen, wilbur looking rather proud of himself and phil seemingly resigned to his fate. tommy has started whining about his sticky hands (as if it isn't his own damn fault for tearing an apple into pieces with his bare hands like some sort of heathen) and wilbur scoops him up, not even minding the juice and pulp getting on his jacket as he whisks the kid to the kitchen to wash him up. phil and techno share a knowing look: this won't end well, will it? tommy is somehow extremely educated and extremely uneducated at the same time. he doesn't know what a banana is, for gods' sake. techno tries to explain the bananas, the reason why banana candy doesnt taste like real bananas, and the banana wars before realizing that tommy is seven years old at the most and probably doesn't understand even half of what he's saying. but to his surprise, tommy nods and tries to bite into the banana peel. techno has to show him how to peel it. even a baby monkey can peel a banana, right? tommy eats the peel anyway and techno has to try not to gag. tommy is messy. techno does not like messy. the little gremlin keeps getting in his stuff, asking what everything is and why, and techno has to keep reminding himself that this is a child, children are naturally curious, and children should not be thrown out of windows. he's tempted though. part of him wants to ask his behind-the-fence nemesis if he wants a new little brother, if he could trade him for some potatoes. not that squid would go for it. too sentimental about his potatoes. it will be his undoing. tommy is loud, messy, and annoying. he asks too many questions for techno to keep up with, and somehow, phil is acting like all of this is normal. he still makes them banana pancakes and waves to wilbur and techno before they leave for school, drops tommy off at his therapy/daycare, and presumably goes to work at...wherever it is that phil works. techno doesn't ask, nobody does. they know better, even little tommy. that's the one question he doesn't seem to ask. but it's so annoying to have to explain the differences between a tomato and an apple (just because they're both fruits and happen to be red does not mean they are the same thing! they hardly have any other similarities!). however, eventually tommy asks just the right question, and techno's perception of him completely shifts.

it happens on a rainy saturday, just after lunch. techno is reading his favorite book, a collection of greek myths. he peeks over the top of his book when he spots movement, and he's greeted by the sight of little tommy creeping towards him on all fours, ears flat and tail out straight behind him. "what's that?" the boy chitters. as if it isn't obvious. "a book, dummy," techno grunts as he quickly flips the cover towards tommy and then back against his knees. tommy huffs in annoyance, as if techno is the annoying one in this situation. "i know that," he complains, "but what kind? what field is it in?" tommy has a knack for sounding really whiney sometimes, techno thinks. all he wants is to read his book in peace, but no. wilbur just had to run off with his friends and leave him here to babysit the brat. "it's fiction, tommy. greek mythology." techno keeps his voice flat and calm, trying not to show his growing irritation. but as always, one question leads to another, and he braces himself for an interrogation.

”what’s mythology?” tommy asks, sitting on his haunches. “i know some greek, but i’ve never heard that word before. and what’s fiction? i never seen a fiction book before.“ his eyes light up and he wags his tail. “oh! is it like greek history? are you reading about sparta and athens and all that cool shit?” techno blinks at him in shock. it takes him a moment to find his words.

”uh, yeah, something like that.“ what kind of kid doesn’t know about fiction? “fiction is made up stuff.“

”like lies?“ tommy tilts his head.

”not exactly. it’s for fun. imagination, all that good stuff.” techno taps the spine of his book. it’s gilded along the cover and the edges of the pages, a very expensive book that took a whole year’s worth of his allowance to buy. “it’s got some mention of sparta and athens, but it’s mostly about the greek gods.“ yet another question seems to practically burn on tommy’s tongue.

”how does it start?” tommy asks. something clicks deep in techno’s head. he sits up abruptly, and tommy skitters back a bit.

”you know what? how about i just read it to you?” techno proposes. a new kind of eagerness creeps into his voice, and tommy picks up on that energy right away. his tail flails frantically behind him and he makes grabby hands, chittering in excitement as techno flips to the first page and clears his voice.

”in the beginning, there was only chaos…”

wilbur makes it home before dad for once. dad must be working late, he figures. hopefully techno hasn‘t tried to trade tommy to the neighbors again while he was gone. wil chuckles to himself as he wipes the mud off his shoes on the welcome mat at the front door, and when he opens it, he’s greeted by the warmth of the fireplace, the smell of tea and candles, and…talking? huh. tommy and techno talking. how odd. wilbur kicks off his shoes and haphazardly shoves them somewhere among the pile by the coat rack and slowly makes his way to the living room. the sight he finds awaiting him is no less than shocking.

techno stands tall on the coffee table, donning a tin-foil helmet and brandishing a wooden sword in one hand, his old book in the other. he’s dramatically reading aloud to an entranced tommy, who kneels on the ground below him with his own little helmet a cardboard shield.

“the labyrinth was long and winding, but theseus knew not to be afraid!” techno narrates, an excited gleam in his eyes. “the huffing of the minotaur taunted him at every turn, until…” he abruptly shifts into his boar form, his tusks shimmering in the light of the fire and his tail flicking excitedly behind him. “the beast leapt out at him! raaagh!” he jumps off the coffee table and tosses tommy the sword, chasing him around the couch in circles. the little boy cackles with glee as he dashes around. wilbur watches from the kitchen with interest as techno narrates the fight, expertly dodging tommy’s clumsy blows until the boy jabs right into the open space between techno’s arm and side. the boar gags dramatically and stumbles to the ground, his tongue hanging out as tommy cheers and jumps around on the furniture.

”wilby! wilby, i slayed the minotaur!” he yells, running into the kitchen to throw his arms around his big brother. wilbur chuckles and pats the boy’s back.

”i saw that! you’re quite a fierce little warrior, aren’t you?“ wilbur praises. he looks back at techno, whose face is flushed with embarrassment as he hides the sword behind his back.

”j-just keeping him out of trouble,” techno mutters.

”uh-huh, sure. i’m positive dad will be thrilled about you two climbing the furniture,” wilbur replies snarkily. tommy and techno both go pale.

”don’t tell him, wilby!” tommy begs. “please! techno was being nice for once! please please please don’t tell!” how can wilbur argue with that?

”i’ll write that essay for you,” techno insists. “don’t be a snitch, man.” well, if he wasn’t already sold before, he sure is now.

”alright,” wilbur resigns with a dramatic sigh. “better hop to it then.” techno’s eyes widen as he realizes what just happened. he huffs and puts the sword on the table, shuffling to his room to grab his textbooks and some paper.

”wilby, wilby! did you know that there was a lady with snakes for hair?” tommy tugs on his sleeve excitedly. “and a big ol goose flew down and it was the thunder guy! and uh, his wife is mean! are all wives mean?” he stops and thinks for a moment. “wilby, what’s a wife?” techno looks annoyed once more as he returns with his materials.

”weren’t you paying attention to anything? that ‘thunder guy’ is zeus, dummy.” he slams his books on the table and glares at the boy. “and honestly? hera had every right to be a jerk when her husband was such a sleazy piece of-“

the two go right back to bickering, but there’s not as much bite to techno’s voice anymore. wilbur smiles and fixes up three mugs of hot chocolate. tommy seems to be fitting in just fine.