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pumpkinboo · 4 years

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Kemonomimi AU: kemonomimi (cat)! Zenitsu Agatsuma x Reader (sfw/nsfw)

Note: the reader is called "Master".

[Foreword]

They probably found him on the street. Dirty, desperate and wrapped in rags.

Since "kemonomimi" became more common in the world, they have sometimes become stray for various reasons. According to the rules, they should have been sent to a specialized shelter, where they would be assisted, but there were no separate services.

Some people took care of bringing kemonomimi to shelters or keeping them temporarily. The Reader was just such a person, so they took the sleeping (or unconscious) kitten. Cubs were rarely thrown away, especially one by one, so it will be easy for the baby to find the owner.

Imagine the surprise when the boy turned out to be not a "kitten", but a cat, just small in height and weight. The understanding was almost instantaneous - mistreatment by the owner and either escape or expulsion from home.

When kemonomimi woke up, he had a panic attack. He sobbed and hid in a corner, promising that he would be a good boy and never disappoint the owner again, just not punishments, and that "it will never happen again." It took the reader a long time to calm the boy down, but he was in a hurry to leave the corner and looked at everything with large, watery eyes. In such a state, it was not possible to take the boy to the orphanage.

The Reader now knew that kemonomimi had an abusive former owner. These are usually the most problematic. He probably settled here until he became calmer... Or until he escaped. The reader has heard that this often happened to kemonomimi who had a strong affection for their owners.

However, kemonomimi was in no hurry to escape. He shrank fearfully, pressed his ears to his head and looked with tears, but did not show aggression at all. Only fear.

However, with the time of cohabitation, the cat began to show less aggression, and was already looking with interest at how the Reader parsed the documents next to him, raising his ears, and did not shrink, listening to the rustle of papers.

After Zenitsu (he himself told you his name) got better with you, to such an extent that he reached for you without fear of a blow or a shout, you were surprised to realize that you are, it turns out, his Master?

If you tried to take it to an orphanage, then you could not even go outside. Zenitsu sobbed that he would be a good boy, and that you did not throw him away, and did not believe in your words about the orphanage, believing that you want to leave him.

[SFW]

Zenitsu loves being stroked on the head and gently scratching his neck or the skin under his jaw. The boy cutely dangles his tail and purrs. In general, he purrs a lot and often when he is allowed to snuggle up to the Master.

Zenitsu loves to listen to their heartbeat, so the Master soon had to get used to sleeping with a cold, soft purring body.

Zenitsu wraps his tail around the Master. It doesn't matter if it is a hip, waist, arm or leg, his tail always tries to hold on to the Master.

Zenitsu likes to bump his head and bump into his master.

He will climb on their hands and knees, even when he becomes a large, adult cat. Surprisingly, Zenitsu doesn't weigh as much as expected. If it is too hard for the Master to hold him on his lap, Zenitsu will put his head on their lap and, closing his eyes, purr in satisfaction.

When the Master left him at home alone for the first time, Zenitsu hid in the Master's clothes so as not to feel lonely. He continues to do this whenever the Master leaves him alone.

Zenitsu is very good at doing household chores (cleaning, washing, cooking). He was forced to learn this when his former owner was gone for a long time. The owner tried not to force him to do this, but Zenitsu insisted, explaining that this is the only thing he is very good at and how he can really help.

He looks happy when he cooks.

Zenitsu greets the Master with a hug as they return. His hearing is very strong, and he always hears when the Master returns to have time to clean himself up and wait at the door.

Zenitsu loves flowers. If the Master has flowers, Zenitsu will enthusiastically look after them. If there are no flowers, then he will not even mention it, considering himself an "obsessive ballast" anyway (especially if the Master tried to send him to an orphanage), but his attachment to flowers is so obvious.

Zenitsu loves water and swimming, he purrs loudly when in hot water.

Zenitsu loves to hide in the Master's bed, especially when they embarrass him.

His body is very flexible and agile, but he is short in stature.

Fortunately or unfortunately, the Master's good food and care allowed his body to continue to grow, and he grew very tall. He's still a baby who loves it when you baby him, but he's tall and very handsome. Apparently, he has some kind of noble pedigree or very good genes?

Zenitsu likes to hug the Master to his chest while sleeping, or to snuggle against their chest. If he wakes up before the Master, he will pet them and possibly whisper sweet / silly things in their ear while giggling.

He wears a collar bearing the Master's name with pride. Zenitsu soothes the feeling that he belongs to someone, and besides, this is the first time he was presented with a collar, which he also chose himself.

The Master very quickly becomes the "Master" in Zenitsu's eyes, even before they even realize it. The moment the Reader brought him food and patted him on the head, Zenitsu began to consider them as his Master.

He likes fish and dough. He will take fish from the table (the maximum level of his trust and affection for you is when Zenitsu is sure that you will not punish him with cruelty or leave him for taking fish from your table; even if you scold him / take the fish for yourself ).

Zenitsu constantly supports the Master in any way, especially if he sees that they are tired or depressed by something. He's not the slickest when it comes to support, but he goes out of his way to let them relax and smile.

A domestic cat that doesn't like the streets. He goes out only with the Master and does not leave them a single step.

Presses into the Master when he is afraid, and cries that there are ghosts in the house if he is scared. Zenitsu insists that the Master keep him all night.

He must be handled very delicately when it comes to anger. Zenitsu is passively aggressive because he is afraid to be aggressive in the open, and if the Master is obviously aggressive (aggressive, not strict), Zenitsu will cry to soften them.

Zenitsu would never abandon the Master, even if they did bad things to them. In the end, they are the closest person to him, and he has gone through too much bad, and too attached to them. After the collar begins to flaunt around Zenitsu's neck, a symbol of his belonging to them, the Master will become the center of his world.

[NSFW]

warnings: mentions of abuse (past owner), mentions of public sex, praise kink, pet play, claims kink, sparking, mentions of brat taming, penetration (reader receiving), anal penetration (reader giving), mentions of cockwarming, oral sex, dressing up, mention of hyperstimulation, mention of denial of orgasm.

It doesn't matter if the sex is gentle or rough, with or without penetration, and who exactly it brings pleasure, Zenitsu is delighted with any sexual activity with the Master.

When his first "rush" happens, he will steal the Master's clothes and will inhale its scent and masturbate on it.

Zenitsu likes it when the Master calls him "good" - good boy, good pet, good kitten. He hates being "bad" and easily bursts into tears if called that because he tries his best to be the best boy for his Master, and being "bad" activates his trigger for living with a past owner.

However, Zenitsu likes to be "dirty", "naughty", "needy" for his Master. He loves the feeling of resignation and weakness, when the Master can simply put him on their lap and spank him while Zenitsu whimpers and fidgets.

But he won't try to escape. Doesn't even think about it.

He likes the feeling of belonging to the Master. Zenitsu will be delighted if the Master "marks" him (hickey, bite).

He likes it when the Master pulls the leash, calling him.

Zenitsu himself rarely bites, preferring to "butt", but he can bite hard enough in a fit of passion, if his Master has not taught him not to do so. His bites go away quickly, especially if he licks the bite.

Zenitsu loves to feel defenseless and naked when his body belongs to the Master and they seem to become "one whole".

He whimpers, groans, sobs and purrs a lot. Especially purrs.

If the Master wants to take Zenitsu inside, then it is worth being prepared for the fact that his penis has a kind of soft "thorns" on the head (a greatly weakened feature preserved from the genes of "feline ancestors"). Since Zenitsu is a bred entertainment for human owners, his body is not as traumatic for a partner as if he were a wild cat, but this may be unusual at first. Although Zenitsu himself is delighted with the stimulation of these "thorns".

If the Master is riding Zenitsa, then closer to orgasm (with the Master's permission) he will push hard into their hips, to such an extent that they will have to lean on his shoulders or look for other support. Zenitsu is actually stronger than he looks, especially when he's this close.

Zenitsu loves when the Master is inside him. He has no preferences other than that the Master is good and that they never leave him (he always whimpers when this happens, even if he himself is no longer able to continue the session). Cockwarming is definitely something Zenitsu likes, especially if the Master snuggles close to him.

During wild sex, Zenitsu can scratch the Master's back if they don't bind his hands or take care of his claws. He will be very bad in the morning, and he will cry a lot and ask for forgiveness.

He likes to crawl at the feet of the Master and be between their legs.

Zenitsu whimpers and groans as the Master praises him for how well he serves them with his mouth. He is so passionate about being a good pet and being praised for his efforts.

He will wear the most beautiful clothes and underwear if he knows that the Master likes it. Zenitsu immodestly demonstrates his body, inviting the Master to play with him, although his cheeks are so red with embarrassment.

Zenitsu can orgasm if the Master plays with his ears or whispers dirty things on them.

Loves when he hears the Master's sounds or sees how their body reacts to pleasure. Mutual hyperstimulation is part of your intimate life.

Zenitsu denies his orgasm or hyperstimulates himself if he sees that the Master is not satisfied.

He'll love it if the Master claims it in public.

Zenitsu's body nicely shakes and twitches as he comes again from the Master's intense touch on his tail.

#kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba au #kimetsu no yaiba headcanons #stuffie.time to relax #stuffie.time to have fun #nsft #sfw #Zenitsu Agatsuma #zenitsu agatsuma x reader

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motherhenna · 5 years

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Writers Rants: Backstory

How to Smoothly Integrate a Character’s Past into the Narrative

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If you are even remotely interested in the process of writing, then you’ve probably heard this phrase at least a hundred times over: show, don’t tell. Such a vague sentiment, but hell if it doesn’t pack a punch. In fact, it’s probably one of the only “rules” of storytelling that ought to be followed as closely as possible and as often as possible—at least in my opinion. But what, exactly, does it mean? In layman’s terms, show don’t tell is a simple recommendation: that authors should actively illustrate a concept rather than passively explain it. Why? Simple. One leaves the reader more room for interpretation and draws them deeper into the action at hand, and the other just…well, tells them what to see and what to feel in the same way a set of DIY instructions describe how to make a quirky set of kitchen lights out of mason jars. While yes, you got a straightforward idea of what to expect, did you actually have fun reading it?

These basic concepts are important to understand if you consider yourself a writer of any kind, as they function as the foundation for a) improving your prose, b) strengthening your characters, and c) forming a flowing narrative that will catch and keep readers’ attention. And naturally, this also applies to the art of exposition.

Most people with even a cursory knowledge of telling a story know that characters should never be blank slates. If you have any desire to portray even a facsimile of real life, you have to put at least some effort into fleshing out the main characters. And when I say ‘flesh out’, I mean do more than just describing what they look like, a laundry list of personality traits, and what they’re wearing. I’m not going to go into this process deeply, as that’s a matter for another think-piece entirely, but it’s a starting point for the more convoluted parts to come. What I’m building up to is that your characters need a backstory, especially if they’re the one(s) through whom we, as readers, experience the story, i.e., the point of view (POV) character. This applies to both first- and third-person limited narratives, unless you’re going for a more anonymous / incidental narrator, like Mr. Lockwood in Wuthering Heights.

Now, these backstories don’t have to be a strict, detailed, chronological transcription of every year in that character’s life (though doing so certainly doesn’t hurt!) Rather, you should write it much like you would describe your own life if you had to plot it out on a timeline. At first, just stick with the most essential elements: where and when in history they were born, whether they have siblings or present family, and a simple list of significant events from various periods in their life. What specific things have most influenced who they are as a person, for good or ill? Next, it’s time to look at the family, since nothing impacts an individual more than how they were raised and how they were treated during their formative years. Were their parents present during their childhood? What was their parents’ relationship like before and after your character’s birth? Are they natives of the country in which the story is set, or did they immigrate—and if they immigrated, why did they do so? All of these and more are, to me at least, vital to developing a well-rounded and realistic character. I’ve even gone so far as to type out entire timelines for each character as well as their parents. Personalities, quirks, trauma—these are all just as hereditary as one’s genes, though this doesn’t mean that this inheritance has to be through blood. Nature vs. Nurture: they’re both equally important in the formation of an individual.

…So, what to do when you’ve finished all that? Do you dutifully transcribe it into the first chapter of your story? Absolutely not. Copy it into a separate document window and keep it there. A large chunk of this is for your benefit: most likely, less than half of it will make it into the written canon of the novel, and for good reason. All of that detailed history isn’t for the reader, it’s for you to use as a framework. Some of the most powerful elements to realistic characters are the unseen, the implied: all the hidden little things that lie just under the surface, but are never fully visible to the naked eye.

What a lot of inexperienced writers may not realize is that everything doesn’t always have to be stated unequivocally through dialogue or info-dumps. How often, in real life, do acquaintances explain upfront that this specific behavior they often exhibit is a result of how they were abandoned by their father and raised by an emotionally distant mother? Most people don’t psychoanalyze everything, nor do we ourselves do it to others—at least not often! Plus, it’s boring. Getting to know characters over the course of a story should be comparable to meeting a new friend. You find out the surface things at first, but pick up bits and pieces along the way that hint at what lies deeper inside. Little by little, you learn about their family, their hopes, dreams, fears…not always directly, and sometimes even in spite of their desire to keep up a front of normalcy.

With all this said, I think it’s become clear where I stand on backstory: it should be subtle, woven gradually into the narrative rather than stated by the character themselves or described by an omniscient narrator. Not only does this make the process of reading about it flow better and progress more naturally, it’s also far more interactive. Instead of being told why a character acts the way they do, the reader can catalogue said character’s actions, motivations, dialogue, and the way they interact with their surroundings, gradually putting the puzzle pieces together for themselves. In a sense, it’s almost a reward for those who read with a careful, inquisitive eye, and can be just as satisfying as solving a mystery before the detective does in a murder mystery.

I’ve used—and will continue to use—a lot of metaphors in this section because it’s the most thorough way I can to explain this process and why it’s so important. That being said, I approach backstory in the same way I might organize a scavenger hunt. It’s not about a treasure map, but rather an ongoing set of little discoveries without which the ultimate prize can never be found. But in keeping with this analogy, why would anyone want to take part in this if a) they’re just given the prize’s location outright, or b) don’t really care about the prize anyway?

When you’re straight-up told about character’s backstory within the first few chapters, there’s no groundwork for investment. Why should I care about this character’s history if I don’t even know them yet? Investment is a gradual process, and ought to be an interactive process too. One of the best strategies of implying backstory without stating it directly is illustrating how a character reacts to specific triggers. Yes, you can tell the reader in the character’s introductory paragraph that he was almost killed in a house fire as a child, which still haunts him to this day—but how else can you impart this information more effectively and poignantly? For some examples, he might…

Be too frightened to turn on the stove.

Avoid any type of matches or aerosol at all costs.

Get anxious when filling up his car at gas stations.

Constantly check and re-check the smoke detectors throughout his apartment

Panic when he smells her neighbor’s lit fireplace.

Why would we need to explain to readers what made him this way when we have all the evidence we need to figure it out for ourselves? Of course, there’s nothing wrong with, later on down the line, this character actively opening up about this trauma to a friend or therapist, as this is only natural and also supplies us with details we would have never known otherwise. This just shouldn’t be the first way we find it out.

Another efficient and interesting approach to gradual backstory incorporation is through dialogue. The way a character responds to nosy questions, criticisms, or simple observations tell a lot about the kind of people they are and how they’re coping (or not coping) with potentially painful parts of their personal histories / insecurities. For example, Character A can ask Character B, “Why don’t you want to go out tonight?” In truth, B is trying to back out of these plans because she can’t fit into a dress she was supposed to wear for the party, and is trying desperately not fall back into the pit dug by the various eating disorders she has suffered from since adolescence. She is afraid her friends will want to take group pictures, or remark on what’s she’s eating or not eating, or notice the extra pudge in her stomach. She remembers how her mother would chide her for eating second helpings when she was young, or all the times her ex called her fat. But B is not going to be capable of explaining all of this to her partner. So how does she respond?

1. “I just…feel tired all of a sudden…but don’t let me keep you from going. I don’t want to spoil your night.” Implication: saving face—she doesn’t want to reveal her real insecurities, so she uses a physical illness as a cover story.

2. “What’s it to you? If this stupid party so important to you, then you can just go without me!” Implication: defensiveness—she is uncomfortable being vulnerable, and lashes out instead.

Now obviously these are just two examples of a plethora of different responses a person might have to a question like this. But what matters is that each answer should give the reader some sort of information as to why said character reacts the way they do. And these reactions don’t have to have traumatic roots, either! Perhaps, because Character C’s older sister always encouraged them to stick up for and respect themselves, C is able to take that positive reinforcement and pay it forward, inspired to protect others who may not know how to protect themselves. Positive change ripples and spreads just as much as negativity, and should never be discounted just because a character has gone through their fair share of tragedy, too.

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In short, there is nothing simple or easy about creative writing—there is so much nuance involved in every aspect, though that shouldn’t discourage newcomers from experimenting and taking everything step by step. There are no absolutes in writing, and every rule can be challenged, so take what I say with a grain of salt. But still, I cannot emphasize enough the importance of backstory when developing strong characters, nor how much more natural a narrative will feel when these things are integrated with subtlety and grace. Your characters should never be objects, concepts, or a means to an end: if you want to make them seem real to your readers, then they must first seem real to you.

...And real people all have their own stories: to find them, all you have to do is watch and listen.

#writing tips #creative writing #writing advice #I wrote this like six months ago but forgot to post it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#motherhenna

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mindibindi · 6 years

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Do you have any tips for writing fanfiction?

Hey, Anon, thanks for the ask and sorry about the delayin replying. I’ve been writing fanfiction for so long that I’ve gotten into abit of a routine with it so I had to have a think about what I actually do. These tipsare based on my own writing practice, experience and approach to fanfic.But I would encourage you to keep asking this question, keep chatting withother authors (some might be kind enough to comment here) as you search for your ownunique writing style and practice. Everyone’s will be different and, as long asit works, I say stick with it. I’m assuming that you’re a new or aspiringauthor so I hope one, some or all of these tips prove useful.

1. Get In The Zone: Find the time of day when yourbest writing happens. For me (rather inconveniently when there’s work to bedone), this is first thing in the morning. For others, I’ve heard it’s themiddle of the day or late at night. But you will know this time when you find itbecause words and ideas will flow freely and easily, faster sometimes than yourfingers can keep up. Revel in this time, use it well then stop writing when theenergy runs out. Nothing good was ever produced by pushing past inspirationinto frustration or exhaustion. That said, inspiration can strike at any time – while watchingan ep or taking a walk or going about your work or trying to fall asleep. When itdoes – whether it’s an opening line, a plot point or snippet of dialogue – jotthose ideas down.

2. Watch (and Rewatch) Your Source Material: Thismay sound obvious (and not much of a chore for a fan) but watching whatevermovie/show/whatever you’re working from helps you to pick up the jargon of thatworld, to absorb the particular milieu, to know the people, places and canon(before you presumably diverge from it). The best fanfic gets both the bigpicture and the little details right. Without these firmly in place, you riskwriting a story that doesn’t ring true to the basic characters, tone orsituation you’re attempting to emulate. You want to extend a reality you love,not break it. So always be on the lookout for any little thing that mightfracture this reality and cause readers to fall out of a world they (you mustassume) know equally well. As a reader, there’s always a jolt when this happens, a dishearteningplummet. So know your stuff before you put pen to paper.

3. Get the Voices Right: Unlike character which canbe ambiguous, changeable and open to interpretation, every fan becomes attuned tothe particular voices of their favourite characters. When reading, you don’t need to work toknow when an author gets this right. You can just hear it. You can also (unfortunately)hear the tiniest slip in consistency and truth. I have written for somecharacters with very distinctive voices, voices I really didn’t think I couldemulate: both Ten and Donna in “Doctor Who”, Jack and Liz in “30 Rock” and,more recently, Gene Hunt in “Ashes to Ashes”. My particular trick for writingthese characters, for practicing their voices, was to write out the dialoguefirst then fill in everything else. Obviously this is only going to work forfics like this, this and this that rely heavily on banter. I love this kind offic. I love reading ‘em and I love writing ‘em. But even in fics which meldprose and dialogue, writing the dialogue out in isolation can help since theseaspects use slightly different writerly muscles.

4. Spellcheck is Your Friend: There will probablyalways be errors in your writing but do your best to avoid preventable andobvious mistakes. These can destroy your credibility as a narrator and takeyour reader out of your story. Personally, I am a compulsive editor. I wouldn’trecommend it. But I would recommend reading through your work at least once andrunning spellcheck before posting. Reading aloud can also help to identify anygrammatical errors or issues with flow. You can, if you find a friend willingto act as beta, outsource some of this work.

5.Don’t Be Afraid to Start Small: I’m a fan of theshort, self-contained fic. I’ve written lots of them and significant work must still go into making them work. So don’t aim to produce 25,000brilliant words right off the bat. Just 1-2,000 solid ones of which you can be proud.

6.Write What You Want: If you’re lucky, readerswill request fics of you (I have never been good at fulfilling these requests).If you’re unlucky, they’ll complain about directions you take or detail whythey refuse to read what you’ve written (this is pretty rare). But you can’t, Ibelieve, force inspiration. It’s either there or it’s not. For me, I beganwriting fanfic because there just wasn’t any for a pairing I shipped. So Iwrote it myself, for myself. I wrote what I liked and wanted to read (I stilldo). This is a medium in which fans have complete autonomy. They choose to go frompassive consumer to active creator. So just do what you do. Do whatever youwant. Turn back time. Bring people back from the dead. Unite lovers. Mergeworlds. Create characters. Make it sad, happy, dramatic or funny or both. You have the power. Claim it. Play with it. Revel init.

7. Start Strong and End Strong: You gotta have agood first line, in my theory of ff. That’s where it (literally) all begins. I always like to openwith something concise and intriguing that immediately communicates a little (butnot necessarily all) of what I’m planning to work with. Don’t be fooled intothinking you gotta start at the beginning. You don’t. You can enter the storyat any point. You can enter late – and leave early, as the saying goes. Thisis a screenwriting principle that ensures that only the most relevantinformation is included in a scene. It keeps the pace of a piece up, controlsthe dissemination of information and keeps audiences engaged. I think thisprinciple transfers rather easily to the page, especially since most of us areemulating material from the big or small screen. In order to imitate thesevisual mediums in written form, you might like to think of paragraphs, breaksand sentence structure as editing techniques that can guide the reader’s pace, growingperception and emotional experience.

8.Avoid Clichés: Clichés can occur at the level ofexpression, character or narrative. At the level of expression, these arewasted words that hold no meaning so find a fresh way to express what you mean.At the level of character, keep words, thoughts and actions rooted in thecharacter. “Show, Don’t Tell” is another well-known writing principle that can help maintain authenticity. As much as we may identify with certain characters, make judiciousdecisions about how much of yourself belongs in them. When writing intimaterelationships, less is often more. I know many shippers (myself included) spendyears sometimes LONGING for couples to express what they mean to each other,physically and/or verbally. By all means, let your beloved characters express –but not everything and not all at once, would be my advice. Allow them to maintainsome sense of mystery and sovereignty. At the level of narrative, clichés canactually work, especially if used with awareness. I had such fun writing a OneBed! fic for Jack and Liz, in which I paidtribute to some of the many reams of MSR fanfiction I had previously consumed.There were so many of these stories in that fandom that they became a categoryof their own, boasting a set of (increasingly ironic) conventions. Some fanfictraditions, it must be said, deserve to be embraced, extended and celebrated.

9. Read: Reading is the easiest way to absorbgrammar, to expose yourself to different writing styles and to become moreadept with language. So read books of all kinds. And read fanfic from your favefandoms. But read it actively, critically. Figure out what works and whatdoesn’t and why. Figure out what you enjoy, don’t and why. Apply theseinsights to your own writing and keep applying them. Keep improving. The more you read and write, the better you’ll get.

10. Avoid Comparisons: My best experiences of readingand writing fanfiction have been in strong, supportive communities. Generally,the more supportive the community has been, the more prolific I have been. These communitiesare wonderful spaces to inhabit, filled with peeps that love their shows,defend their ships and support their authors. Authors are always hungry forfeedback, and is it any wonder? Writing, creating and sharing takes work, love,thought and guts. You have to claim a little corner of a fandom and boldlystate that you have something to say that’s worth listening to. Sadly, you will probably never receive the same amount of energy back as you putin. This can lead to authors comparing their output and input, judging theirwork on its stats rather than on its merits. It can lead to them competing forthose few meagre reviews that roll in. This is partly why it is so important toreview fanfic, particularly fanfic you love and authors you read consistently.It’s part of encouraging and creating a sense of community in which people feeltheir voices are heard and their contributions valued. So be generous with others. Encourage and share. Read, review, reblog.Treat your fellow writers as your community, not your competition. Viewfanfic as a labor of love, an act of generosity that sometimes gives back. And if you don’t get the response you wishfor then make sure you hit that internal heart button and give yourself somekudos for trying, for creating, for loving something and letting it show.

Good luck. :)

#fanfic #asks

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linkspooky · 7 years

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What do you think about Shuu screaming about wanting to eat Kaneki? It sounded so much like he was regressing and definitely not going forward, I was so upset when I read it. His speech sounded so beautiful and heartfelt and I feel like it got ruined. Is it actual comic relief or maybe Shuu is regressing into the past, like Amon, Akira and Hide, and Touka dying her hair like in the first half of the series?

I’m going to break down Shuu’s speech the best I can. I want everybody to remember this is my interpretation, if you interpret this speech as a perfectly happy speech on Shuu’s part and growth for his character that is fine.

I think there is a lot of genuine love represented in this chapter. Tsukiyama is obviously trying to look past the situation, and realize what he wanted is for his friend to be happy. That’s a simple and basic desire and it’s not a wrong one. What Tsukiyama talks about, are the simple pleasures in life that Kaneki would lose in killing himself, and also the ones he would lose if he disappeared completely into the role of king.

This matches up a lot with his birthday poem. I’ve always loved Shuu’s poem, because it’s so beautiful, kind, and accepting. It’s such a stark contrast to the empty sounded messes that are Furuta and Sasaki’s birthday poems.

It will be alright.

The world will grow to be kind.Everything will be okay.

Even if it’s only one person, someone will definitely understand you.

Someone will surely love you.Even if you are hurt due to loneliness, someone will surely embrace you.

[x]

Haise’s:

Someone said this:

“Even if you have no memories of being loved, for as long as you have memories of loving someone, you can continue to live.”

…But how is someone who has never been loved be capable of loving someone else?

A child who wasn’t able to receive the minimal love they required at the time they needed it the most will continue to gaze at the illusion of affection and never know how to love until the day they die.

Well, how about me? Can I continue to live?

[x]

Furuta’s:

How stupid.

What’s so joyous about birthdays, I wonder.Never in my life have I ever felt grateful for being born.

But for you people, how are you still celebrating your life despite how hopelessly stupid or ugly you are?

I am genuinely impressed.

Doesn’t it make you want to die?

[x]

Remember, Haise is generally considered to be the most mentally healthy and sound of all the Kaneki’s. Even the Kirishima birthday poem sounds like this.

The children who were meant to be born, died. The vision of the future convulses.

Someone declared that they’ll crush only half of the broad bean.The gene is in a severe bipolar state.The nucleic acid sequence having no recollection of its own actions.

All of the fingers that were supposed to be connected from start to end, are scattered around; it’s annoying.

If you look closely at the knot, you can see that it can be surprisingly easy to untie.

[x]

And Touka is the one whose spent this arc trying to reconcile Kaneki, and inspire him to live again. Even Hinami’s wish for Kaneki and Touka to live sounds like this.

“You’re going to be depressed and miserable but live I guess....”

It makes sense for their to be one character who genuinely believes in a happy ending and a happy life, and one character who believes he can make it there. It makes sense for that character to be Shuu, because from the beginning what Shuu is and always has been is somebody who appreciates the beauty of life. He’s a social sciences major. Not only is he a musician, he’s a great singer, and he learned several different languages just because he thinks linguistics are beautiful.

Shuu’s good qualities have always been his own appreciation for life. His bad qualities is his own unhinged indulgence to that pleasure, that he would take it at the cost of others. Shuu’s always been a character focused around happiness which I think is still an important arc to learn... really the last 40 chapters even with Kaneki’s want to live satisfied, he’s been mopey and miserable almost the entire time.

It’s not enough to simply live and survive.

On the other hand, Shuu is clearly once again doing what all the other characters in the manga do and transferring their wishes onto Kaneki. Karren’s last wish was meant for Shuu and Shuu alone, and also herself.

It’s exactly the same as as Hinami transferring her mother’s last words to live, which were clearly meant for her onto Kaneki.

The one who should be doing this is Hinami. The one who should be living with Karren’s sacrifice is Tsukiyama. Especially since Kaneki murdered Karren in cold blood.

Yet we see once again the characters are transferring their desires onto the empty Kaneki, and using him as a mechanism to fulfill them. Itori and Shuu’s speech are both lies, but Itori’s was meant to convince the ghouls into passivity while Shuu’s to rile them up into action.

Generally I would say, for this speech Tsukiyama’s eyes not shown = Lies. Tsukiyama’s eyes shown = Tsukiyama’s genuine feelings.

Once again I spent the entire first half of this talking about how this is Tsukiyama’s genuine sentiment.

THen we have that old chestnut. “I get to eat Kaneki.” Soemthing that has been proven long ago, was actually just Shuu’s misconstruing of his own feelings, which is once again what Shuu is likely doing here. Shuu wants Kaneki to live and he wants to confront Kaneki for real this time, but I don’t think he wants to save Kaneki from all the conseqeunces of his actions, or live entirely for Kaneki’s own actions as he’s presenting himself with in his speech.

If anything, Shuu’s speech is about how the members of Goat should perceive Kaneki as a person with his own wants and needs, not just the instrument of their vengeance.

At the same time though, Shuu kind of dehumanizes Kaneki in the opposite direction. Goat doesn’t exist for the sake of Kaneki’s happiness, all of those ghouls who had lost loved ones to the CCG their grievances are still valid and should not be forogtten.

The ideal should be found in a medium between the two, but Shuu himself is not the most emotionally smart of people. It makes sense that he’d try to correct and then swing far and wild in the opposite direction.

As I’ve said in my previous asks too, at the moment there is no Kaneki to confront. If Shuu decided right at this moment “Fuck Kaneki I’m going home,” that would be great for his character yes but it would lead to absolutely nothing. Tokyo Ghoul also sometimes has to work as a story and a sequence of events too rather than just character piece after character piece.

I think the editor’s text is important to understanding Shuu’s viewpoint too. He still sees himself as a sword to Kaneki, which is to say not a person but rather an asset to use. Both of those viewpoints are equally dehumanizing, Kaneki being a tool for Goat, and Goat being a tool for Kaneki, and ideally what should happen eventually is Kaneki the person and also Goat’s individual members being recognized and cared about as people too, and more than just the ones that Kaneki individually cares about as people but we’re obviosuly not there yet and we can’t really get there with Kaneki as a giant worm either.

Perhaps it’s not the most clear or smart way to tell it, but basically all this chapter does is motivate the characters involved not to give up on Kaneki. “There’s still things I need to say to him” that’s what the majority of the goat members agree upon.

When Kaneki the person is there, that’s when it makes more sense for the flaws in his actions to be addressed.

#Anonymous #metasks

177 notes · View notes

fenweak · 7 years

Text

Below the cut are 91 fics that feature Jonny and Patrick as creatures that lurk and prey (and snuggle) in the night. From wolfverses to fluffy animal transformations to love/sex magic. I've had such a great time re-reading all of these, as this pairing has been graced by so many amazing authors. Happy reading and happy Halloween!

★ are personal faves

Demons

a dainty dish to set before the king by mockturtletale ★ - demon!Kaner

But then the clocks strike midnight - clocks plural - and that’s weird as fuck, because the year is 2013 and Jonathan Toews doesn’t own any clocks that make that noise. He doesn’t own any clocks that make noise period.

Crossroad Blues by activevirtues- demon!Kaner

In which the demon Patrick Kane gives Jonathan Toews everything he's ever wanted.

Feathers by MJBadger - demon!Kaner, angel!Jonny

Not that Patrick has been snagging many souls or causing much in the way of mischief, lately. He supposes he should go out at some point and play a bit of catch-up. He assumes Jonny's been hanging out on park benches and saving jackasses left and right.

In which Jonny is an angel, and Patrick is a lazy demon.

Sweet and Tender Hooligan (or the post-apocalyptic au) by jezziejay - demon!Kaner

In which Kaner is a daemon of chaos, and Jonny is just trying to hold onto his city. Dystopian universe. Dark. Dark characterisation. A little TW, a litte GoT, and a little Patrick Ness.

Together Burning Bright - demon!Jonny

Four times Jonny tried to eat Patrick's soul, and the one time he couldn't.

The Creek by mullsandmutts - demon!Kaner, angel!Jonny

Jonathan is a literal angel. Patrick is a literal demon (but with a sweet and kind heart -- it's complicated, okay?). They meet where their worlds are divided and existence might never be the same

Going West - not gonna spoil it but i love it

Jonathan finds the boy along the outskirts of a town market, chained to a post. There's a bronze armband clasped tightly on his forearm, winding around it like a snake, and he stares sullenly at the ground, heedless of Jonathan's gaze, while his toe traces patterns in the dust.

"I want him," Jonathan says to the vendor, pointing.

That's a lie.

Constant as a Northern Star - demon-hunter!Jonny, Pat is his safekeeper

The term "preux" was first used in the scripture that would become known as the Treaty of Avignon [signed in 1156, copies of the original - which was destroyed in the Siege of Harfleur in 1418 - are stored in Prague and Trondheim], marking not only the beginning of the working relationship between vampires and preux but also the use of a term to distinguish the preux from ordinary hunters.

(Or: Jonathan is a good fighter (it doesn't get more AU than this), Patrick waits for him,hates it and is a BAMF no matter the circumstances. Sharpy knows everything but doesn'tbetray anyone's secrets. He's a vampire, he has morals.)

Soulless by ice_hot_13 - demon!Jonny

Jonny used to have a soul.

Vampires

where the wild things are series by liketheroad - twilight AU

Seeing Johnny skate, Patrick realizes two things at the same time. One, Johnny is an incredibly gifted, terrifying hockey player, and two, Patrick is completely and irredeemably gay for him. Also, he’s definitely a vampire, but whatever, Patrick doesn’t really give a shit about that part. (Twilight AU)

Provenance by fourfreedoms ★ - vampire!Jonny | sorta sequel here

“I uh, didn’t think it would be done so fast,” Patrick said when he arrived. Jonathan stared at him. “Done? You insult me. A good suit, at a lackluster slapdash minimum, needs three-fittings. You’ll be in here for four, I assure you.”

true blood chatfic by doctor_denmark - vampire!Jonny | not fic but still cute

So, sometimes hockey blogs say that Jonathan Toews's playoff fail-beard makes him look like a "victorian era vampire" (repeatedly), and when this happens, I start telling myself about the True Blood au, where Toews is the first vampire to play in the NHL, and Patrick Kane is the deeply closeted hockey player who falls in love with him. Then horrible enablers let me chat-fic at them for hours, and I end up with about 8,000 words, which is 9 times more than i managed on my thesis today.

I'm putting it here, because the world needs to witness my folly.

nature of the immortal being by Mayhem10 - vampire!Kaner

“Wait,” interrupts Jonathan, finally registering Patrick’s rant. “What exactly are you allergic to?”

Patrick waves dismissively. “You know, the usual.”

(In which Patrick is the worst vampire ever and Jonathan grows his own garlic.)

Sealed With A Kiss - (butt)vampire!Kaner

Five minutes after Coach Q explains to his new team that Patrick is indeed a supernatural creature of the night, he’s hustled into the corridor by his cute as hell new captain.

“An ass-eating vampire?” Jonathan asks.

“It’s not like I had a choice,” Patrick says, defensively.

bloodlust - vampire!Kaner

One Time Patrick Kane Didn’t Drink From Jonathan Toews and Five Times He Did (also known as Vampire Kaner)

so say, what are you waiting for? by nuuclears - vamp!Jonny

“But are you even into this?” Patrick asks, biting his lip at how vulnerable it comes out.

Jonny straightens up fully and stares at him, hands full of gatorade bottles forgotten at his sides. “Kaner, it’s blood,” Jonny tells him incredulously, and ok, a valid point, Patrick does have some idea of how vampires get about blood, but still. It’s not like they’re just drinking from everyone either.

“And,” Jonny says, and blows out a harsh breath of air that he doesn’t even need. “And it’s you,” he admits, like it costs him something.

vampire!kaner AU by allthebros

He comes back to himself with Jonny’s blood in his mouth.

Werewolves

All Practise and No Play by james - were!Kaner

Sometimes Tazer thinks it's like herding puppies. Actually, no, he thinks that all the time.

by the throat by liketheroad

The one where they're werewolves growing up in Manitoba.

Catalyst - were!Jonny

Full moon’s coming.

It’s about a week out, but even if they didn’t all keep a careful calendar of it, Patrick would know it just by looking at Johnny. Patrick’s known a few werewolves before, some distant family, and Johnny’s got all the hypervigilant aggression he’s used to seeing from them, but what they direct at others—bristling when people get too close, snapping when they’re provoked, showing teeth—Johnny turns inward.

fight or run, you're just getting older (podfic available by AshesandGhost) - were!Kaner

Contrary to popular belief, weres don't actually need alphas. Patrick never had one, since he's the only person in his family with the gene, and his parents didn't push him into finding one. Alphas make their betas better; they keep them calm and level, they support them, they guide them. Without an alpha, betas are perfectly fine. They're just better with one.

Instincts (podfic available by exmanhater)

They don’t talk about what happens during the moon; and they don’t talk about how Patrick drives over sometimes to curl up on the couch and put his head in Johnny’s lap, jittery all over until he gets the anchoring weight of Johnny’s hand on the back of his neck; and they don’t talk about how Johnny calls him some nights and says, “Come over,” and Patrick does, because Johnny’s head is pounding with the need to get Patrick where he can see him, breathe in the scent of him, know he’s there and well. If they don’t talk about it they can just keep having whatever they need from each other; and that’s what they’ll do, because Johnny is Patrick’s alpha and Patrick needs him to be that for him.

For Johnny, it’s always been more.

I've Got A Feeling (I Hope You're Feeling It Too) by aohatsu - highschool werewolves AU!

When Patrick met Jonny for the first time, it was because they'd both just been picked for the same hockey team. When Patrick netted his first goal during practice, Jonny skated over to give him a congratulatory hug and, well, it's not like he didn't sometimes shift on accident, when he was excited or happy, but it hadn't happened at practice in ages.

Not Passive but Aggressive by reserve

Patrick Kane is a shitty werewolf; Jonathan Toews loves him anyway.

sun sweet berries of the earth series by gasmsinc - were!jonny, forest spirit!kaner

There is a spirit living in Patrick State Park.

“Listen,” says Jonny. “I didn’t mean to step on your crown.”

The spirit’s bottom lip wobbles.

What If The Storm Ends ★

Here’s how it goes: Pat was out at a club, got bitten by a wolf—wtf?—got yelled at by Abby Sharp, woke up naked on her kitchen table, spent the day hiding in an IHOP, played the most aggressive game of hockey in his career and got mob-bossed off the ice by Sidney Crosby who, for the record, was surprisingly terrifying.

That was Tuesday.

wolf like me by gasmsinc ★ - were!Jonny

When Patrick had imagined his eighteenth birth year celebrations, he hadn’t imagined them taking place in a fortress a thousand miles away from home, surrounded by a people who were only his by marriage, while sitting next to a husband he barely knew.

He had imagined celebrating in Paelford Castle, right there in the great hall where his family had held every celebration, surrounded by the servants and nobles he had known his entire life, his parents and sisters on either side of him. He hadn’t imagined celebrating his eighteenth birth year on his wedding day, either.

Wolfverse by linsky - were!Patrick

Patrick has two goals for himself when he comes to Chicago: Win the Stanley Cup. And don’t let anyone find out he’s a wolf.

Ghost

Transcendence by ice_hot_13 - ghost!Jonny

Jonny shows up at midnight to play at the rink, and Patrick doesn't know who he is, what he's doing, or how the hell he even gets into the building, but Patrick still can't stay away.

If You Like It, Then You Should've Put A Ring On It - stepquietly

Tazer haunts Patrick through his TV and keeps threatening to kill him. And Kaner makes jokes about how Tazer lives at the bottom of a well and still uses a VCR. (The Ring AU crack!fic)

feel your heart beating as clearly as my own - ghost!Jonny

[He still doesn't get enough sleep most nights, and even though Jonny's there, he's notreally there, and he spends a lot of time sitting on the couch staring out the window,Jonny's hand clenched around his, like he's not sure what else to do.]

Jonny dies. Then he starts bothering Patrick.

the ghost & mr. kane - ghost!Jonny

"Uh," he starts. "You--if you're robbing me, you're not doing a great job of it."

"I'm not--I live here!"

"No you don't," says Patrick, dumb. "I live here."

"Yeah, I'm--I'm--I do too."

It snaps together for Patrick, suddenly--the guy's weird muttonchops, his suit, the way he disappeared and reappeared. "You're my ghost?" he asks. Just for confirmation, you know.

"Yes," his ghost says, glowering and still rusty-voiced.

as the ominous others

defrost, debauch, destroy by psocoptera (podfic by exmanhater) ★ - ???

Beneath the ice, dread things lie dreaming. Or listening to One Direction, whatever.

thy hair soft-lifed by the winnowng wind by forochel ★ - leprechaun!Kaner

He made sure to lay out two saucers, one of spiked milk and one of pure whisky, that night; it was the closest to an apology he could think of.

Anatomy of a Hybrid series by maccabird_23 (abandoned WIP) - magical hybrid AU

Professional sports were chock-full of wolf and dragon hybrids; littered with adept humans but lean on the fairer hybrid. Most elves stayed to the more delicate athletics. Ballet and figure skating being the few sports they excelled at. Elves definitely didn’t play hockey. + Pat was many things but dumb wasn’t one of them. He knew how his teammates looked at him when he got worked up or even worst, turned on. He felt it deep in his gut and couldn’t control as the excitement, anger or arousal blossomed on his skin. Sparks of red and blue taking off from the tips of his pointy ears when he was happy. Deep reds gathering like coal along his scales when he was upset. His lips turning blistering silver before settling on frostbite red whenever he looked at Jonny.

bare those teeth to me please, man-eater - selkie!Jonny

the one where johnny is a selkie, and patrick is the fisherman's son who loves him.

1988 selkie AU by allthebros - selkie!Jonny

They never give their skin willingly, his grandpa told him. You gotta either steal it and hide it away where they can’t find it, cause, believe it, first chance they got, they’re gone–doesn’t matter if they love you or if they have kids, they love and want the sea more. Or you gotta let them have their skin and let them go once the tryst is over. They don’t stay land-locked by choice, though they can still be happy and love like we do.

Patrick’s grandpa was a wise man, which is why it takes him more than a moment to understand what Jonathan is saying. “Take it, Patrick,” he repeats, his seal-skin all folded up between his strong hands. “I wanna stay.”

But You're So Magnetic by forochel - veela!Kaner

Kaner comes into his veela heritage on his 24th birthday. Shenanigans and surprise feelings ensue.

call it magic by thundersquall ★ - faerie!Patrick

“It’s the faerie blood in me,” Patrick explains.

Jonny is just not equipped to deal with this shit.

OR, on March 17, Patrick turns into a faerie.

(Can't Help) Faun'in in Love by Miss_Psychotic - faun!Kaner

When Jonathan is 12, he meets a boy named Kaner.

Crest and Break by hatrickane - mer!Kaner

Kaner’s life in the deep is more than fulfilling - even despite his fascination with the fisherman who floats on the surface. He knows he has to keep his obsession a secret from the other Merfolk - but no banishment, magic, or legend is going keep him from getting closer to those kind eyes.

Friend Like Me by hatrickane ★ - genie!Jonny

It wasn’t as beautiful as most oil lamps, Patrick surmised. It was a little stained, the ceramic chipped in places, but a meticulously crafted leaf sat nestled at the open mouth and Kaner dragged his fingertips over it.

It was warm, and he wanted it. Even without knowing what was inside.

First Frost by SimoneClouseau ★ - faerie (unseelie!Jonny)

When he makes it to the party they ask him where he disappeared to an hour ago and Patrick stares back at them.

“What do you mean an hour?” he says. “It’s been ten minutes.”

Sharpy starts laughing. “Fine, don’t tell us.”

Patrick thinks maybe, just maybe, he’s going insane.

Patrick ends up somewhere he shouldn't be, and Jonathan is forced to claim him to save his life.

I want to meet the kind of folks I've never met by pistol_red - mer!Jonny

In which Johnny is tangled in a net and Patrick is the merman who saves him.

kiss the boy by gasmsinc - mer!kaner

The fish’s head is submerged completely under water. The only thing sticking out is the curve of its back, but Jonny can finally see why it’s stuck: there’s a fishing net hooked on a part of the rock.

It’s then that the fish decides to move again. Its tail thrashes back and forth wildly, and in its panic the fish bangs its broken fin right into the rock. A series of air bubbles pop up to Jonny’s right, but he doesn’t have time to acknowledge how weird that is, because three seconds after the bubbles, a boy’s head pops out of the water.

Jonny yells.

My Heart's in the Sea - Samantha_Holmes - mer!Jonny

When a mermaid named Jonathan saves a prince named Patrick from drowning, little did they know that their lives would be intertwined forever.

Animal Transformations

After Forever After by hockeyhawk ★ - angry frog!Jonny

One moment there was a captain. Next moment there was a frog. Someone has to step up, apparently it's Kaner.

The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All by forochel - hedgehog kaner

It’s a little known fact that the Kane family are in possession of a genetic quirk — an x-linked recessive gene — that basically boils down to this: Kaner turns into a hedgehog one day and gets stuck.

An Experiment In Hedgehog Physics by exmanhater - hedgehog!Kaner

Hedgehog!Kaner has the best ideas.

Hedgehog!Kaner series by altri_uccelli ★ - hedgehog!Kaner

Uhhhh, hedgehog Kaner in Switzerland.

Jon brings him up to his neck, cuddling him against the skin of his throat. He’s always done that, way back before everything. Even though it prickles, even though it gives him a light rash sometimes, he just likes Kaner there.

“Been awhile,” he whispers again.

+ A collection of ficlets and tagfic in the hedgehog!Kaner 'verse.

Better Off With You by tictactoews - hedgehog!Jonny

Tazer has always seemed prickly on the outside, but he takes it to a whole new level when he turns into an actual hedgehog and becomes dependent on Patrick's care.

Changing on the Fly by mermaid - pitbull!Kaner

"Where's Kaner?" Jonny asks. "Where did this pit bull come from?" Duncs chews on his lip. "Uh, see, there's actually only one answer to both those questions."

Still muzzy with sleep, Jonny blinks at the guys. "So, like – Kaner got me a dog? And sent you two here to deliver it?"

"No," Sharpy says. "No, Kaner is the dog."

Duck Tales - duck!Jonny

“I think he needs floaties.”

Patrick resists the strong urge he gets to slam his head against the wall. “Kaner. He’s aduck; I don’t think they make floaties for them. What kind of duck can’t swim?”

“The kind that are magically transformed hockey players?” Kaner suggests and damn it, hehas a point.

Gone to the Dogs - puppy!Jonny

Jonathan Toews turns into a puppy. Then some other stuff happens.

Hooked on a Feeling (podfic available by exmanhater) - pug!Jonny

The one where Patrick is not exactly Bella Swan and Jonathan is definitely not Sparkly Whatshisname.

OR, THE WERE-PUG AU.

Into Each Life Some Rain Will Fall Like Cat Piss on Your Shoes by james - cat!Kaner

Johnny is waiting for Patrick to get home from Switzerland. What he gets is a surprise.

Slip the Jesses, My Love by flitterflutterfly - literally a hawk!Jonny

Jonny’s gets turned into a hawk and the only one he lets hold him is Patrick

The Cat Crept In by Celly1995 - kitten!kaner

Jonny's not entirely sure why he needed to get back to Chicago so urgently, because he *definitely* doesn't want to admit to himself that he's missing Patrick. But it's just as well he did come home, because Patrick's... not himself.

the skies are not cloudy - buffalo!Jonny

In which Jonathan Toews can turn into a buffalo, and Patrick Kane is the idiot in love with him.

Through the Looking Glass - puppy!Jonny, kitten!Kaner

The fic where Tazer becomes a puppy and Kaner turns into a kitten, but Sharpy still doesn't see any difference in how they behave.

To push a frozen rope - kitten!Kaner

It's just another day in the Blackhawks locker room when Patrick Kane decides to turn into a puppy.

you come around and the armor falls by altri_uccelli - puppy!Jonny

Patrick's in bed when he hears it, and at first it sounds like a peep that a phone might make, but then it happens again, elongated like a whine. His only theory is that it's a mouse, caught somewhere, and if Jonny's going to make a nuisance of himself by staying when he's not invited, he can damn well take care of this.

Bonus: IGAL 'verse by svmadelyn has an amazing tumblr tag that has ficlets and tag!fics with puppy!Tazer and doggo kids. Warning cuteness overload

Love & Sex & Magic

#1 Crush - sex magic

Patrick shows up at his and Jonny's hotel room under the influence of sex magic. 5000 words of porn ensues.

caring is creepy by liketheroad ★ - truth magic

When he gets out of the shower Johnny stares at him like Kaner’s the best thing he’s ever seen, which weirds Kaner out even more than the rest of this situation, because what, not even Johnny’s eyes can lie, now? This is some fucked up shit. Fucking Canucks fans, seriously.

In which Tazer is truth whammied by a Canucks fan and it turns out he has a lot of feelings. Mostly about Kaner. But also about bacon.

Changing the Rules of the Game by Herwhereabouts - magic powers

Tazer has a concussion and is desperate to get better, while Kaner has healing powers he is unaware he possesses. Much drama ensues.

still into you by altri_uccelli - gender transformation

It's not even 12 hours after Jonny discovers he's a girl that he's sprawled on an itchy sofa, biting on his fist and being eaten out by Patrick Kane. He can't believe that a day exists in which having oral sex with Kaner, his oldest friend on the team and frequently a pain in his ass, is not the weirdest thing to happen.

A Handy Guide To Making You Feel Good by fourfreedoms and joyfulseeker - gender transformation

When it had first happened, body melting into this new form right there in front of all the guys, he’d demanded an answer from Jonny. “Did you see this coming?” A five first times fic.

+ “Um…” Patrick says, staring at the water beading down over the curve of one breast and along his taut stomach.

“What?” Jonny asks, furrowing his brows.

Patrick finally gets the chance to lend a helping hand.

Hanging on a Moment of Truth - sex magic

As it turns out, the weird sex magic is the least of Kaner's problems.

i mingle with divinity by mockturtletale - lucky sex magic

“Hey,” Patrick says, putting his hand on Jonny’s thigh, feeling giving, “It’s totally us. You and me, we’re golden when our boners touch. It’s just what happens after that’s unnatural or whatever.”

roving eye ravenous by toomanyhometowns ★ - possession

He opened his mouth to start talking and blinked.

So Deep in My Heart (That You're Really a Part of Me) by kiwoa - bodyswap

"No way," Jonny says, and he slowly turns his - Kaner's - head from side to side, watching the muscles in his face and neck shift. He licks his lips; it tastes wrong. His left wrist feels too stiff and his legs and stomach look too skinny and his hair still itches, damnit. Jonny scratches the back of his neck with nails that are too long and uncomfortably ragged.

"Okay," he says slowly. "Okay, this is not good."

Symptomatic by snapple_jax - sex magic

“What, like it’s hard?” Jonny parrots along with Elle Woods. He side-eyes Patrick, fully prepared for the gleeful chirp about how he knew Jonny loved this movie all along.

Only Pat’s turned an alarming shade of red before scurrying to the bathroom, blanket trailing behind since he couldn’t untangle himself fast enough.

the gift of obedience - obedience magic

Patrick will be fine without Jonny. Really. All he has to do is track down Lucinda and get her to break the spell. He doesn’t even have to liberate an oppressed magical species or find true love along the way.

The Hug Offensive by ingenius - magic powers

When he's five, Patrick figures out that he has a super power. He thinks it's awesome.

under your skin by hazel - bodyswap

Patrick goes to bed that night in Tazer’s guest room. It’s not the first time he’s slept there, but it’s the first time he’s tried to sleep in Tazer’s body. His legs want to kick out weirdly into the corners of the bed, and his head can’t find a comfortable position on the pillow. He drops off eventually anyway, worn from the current of rage he’s been carrying around all day and the constant slow rhythm of Tazer’s heartbeat, drumming in his chest like a cage.

yours and/or mine by demotu - bodyswap

Jonny shows Patrick how it works. And by "it", I mean his dick. Jonny's, but temporarily Patrick's.

love is a contact sport by hazel and mermaid ★ - soul bond

"And the tragic reality of Patrick's life is that even though they broke up over a year ago, he and Johnny still play beautiful hockey together."

A high school AU, featuring dream-fish, bad movie dates, and a little bit of magic.

glory days by liketheroad - soul bond

He never expected his destiny to involve anything but hockey, never thought it would show up in flip flops, but when Patrick smiles at him across the locker room, quick and surprised, Johnny lets his priorities shift and change without a hint of reluctance or regret.

22 by aohatsu ★- soulmate

There’s no other explanation. His soulmate must have turned twenty-two yesterday.

more magical Realism and fantasy

say it with flowers by hazel ★

GOOD WORK, YOUNG HAWK, the oak tree outside his building booms once the season’s over, and Patrick smiles sleepily in its direction.

He's never been sure how the trees of Chicago know about hockey—trees hear a lot, but it's not like he's ever stopped in a public park to ask one about it.

The Purity Myth by downjune ★

Patrick Kane is a unicorn—the ferocious, foul-mouthed, man-hating kind.

these are the fables on my street by Fahye ★

Patrick makes a fucking superhuman effort, sweeps up the mess of his emotions, and stashes his incipient freakout about all of this somewhere in the back of his mind where he can have it later. When Jonny's back in the driver's seat, and Patrick's had a chance to bring up the whole blowjobs-and-beach-walks issue. Focused on the win, that's Patrick Kane.

Custos by hatrickane

The legend goes as this: The Sorcerer of Mount Custos, the guardian, serves as the protector of the farmfolk.

Patrick thinks it's bullshit.

I have as much soul as you (and full as much heart) by Mayhem10

Jonathan Toews was born with only half a heart. He didn't know that the other half existed, let alone that it was held by some irritating American named Patrick Kane.

A Magical Realism AU

May your past be the sound by elareine

After that, Jonny set some rules for himself.

1. No using his power for himself. That just looked like a slippery slope to him. Helping others was fine, though. 2. Consequently, no manipulating the outcome of a game, no matter how badly he wished to change the way he’d played. That would be unfair and undermine any victories. 3. No relationships with teammates. Not related to the time travel thing, but important enough to include in this list. Just because he could turn back time didn’t mean he had to create any more opportunities for a giant clusterfuck than necessary.

(Five times Jonny travelled back in time, one time he couldn't, and one time he chose not to.)

Like a Leaf That's Caught In the Tide by Frosting50

For more than 200 years the Toews men have been blamed for everything that’s ever gone wrong in the town of Pumpkin Hollow. Or the Practical Magic AU no one asked for.

bring it if you really want it by staraflur

It starts like this:

Well, okay, Patrick has no idea how it actually starts. But as pertains to him (in other words, the important part), it goes a little something like so: America, being a nation composed in large part of a melting pot of immigrants who may or may not have taken over land already owned by others using less-than-savory means, doesn’t have much of a magical national identity. Much less a magical continental identity. There’s no grand heritage going back thousands of years. Magical families home-schooled all their kids until, like, the 1800’s, and tough for the muggle-born, apparently. Hopefully you got noticed by someone who knew what to do with you before you got burned at the stake. Since you probably can’t control your powers, sport.

forget met (not) by hippietoews

“You're remembering him, aren't you?" Pat asks. Jon hums quietly.

After the battle with Pitch, Jon never talked about his memories. He didn't share anything about his previous life with the other Guardians. He knows that they have memories of their own previous lives, but they seem so unattached to them now.

Who they are now is what matters.

Long Way Home by tictactoews

Jonathan Toews is a young heir to the Winnipeg castle and estate, but this comfortable and sheltered life is not what he really wants. When circumstances force him to join a group of Grey Wardens - warriors dedicated to defend the world against monstrous enemies - Jonathan finds a new life and new friends, including two runaways from the neighboring country of Orlais, an old friend who's now back in his life, and a rogue elf who will come to mean more to Jonathan than he ever expected anyone could.

Dragon Age AU. No prior knowledge of the game necessary to read this story.Spoilers (if any) for Origins and Awakening.No spoilers for Inquisition.

the times i spent with you

"Pat plays Quidditch because not playing feels like dying. It's just that simple." Quidditch AU

through the mirrored maze

Jonathan's relationship with his daemon is different from anyone else's.

together again for the very first time by draftingletters

Like, seriously, this is the great fucking irony of Kaner’s life. You’d think it’d be pretty awesome, having powers of prophecy and all that, but all the dreams that end up coming true are so hideously fucking boring. It’s the perfectly natural normal dreams his brain spits out that are fucked up. The kind where he plays for the Ducks, or is a professional florist, or a neon green elephant. Or banging Tazer.

the walls kept tumbling down (in the city that we loved) series by altri_uccelli

“Patrick wonders idly what Toews' daemon is; something like a python, maybe, or a bird of prey. It would just figure if it were a hawk, Patrick thinks in disgust; he's already starting to hate Toews a little so he tries to dial it back. Then he notices a big cat—some kind of, like, mountain lion—sitting well apart from the other daemons. It's watching the ice intently, and if Patrick had anyone to bet with, he knows where he'd put his money.”

+ fighting dragon remix ★ by altri_uccelli

A month ago, Jon thinks: a month ago he hadn't even heard of daemons, hadn't yet had his life turned upside down by a talking otter and a boy with dimples and the smoothest skin he'd ever touched and secrets held close behind long-lashed blue eyes.

world enough and time

The effect is instantaneous: Jonathan jerks forwards, gasping, and over the white-noise screaming his eyes are wide and frightened and fiercely alive. In that instant Patrick thinks, clear as a bell, god, he’s gorgeous. Fuck. (A Pushing Daisies AU.)

For fic inquires. Rec me a fic? Happy reading!

#patrick kane #kaner #jonathan toews #1988 #kane/toews #fic rec

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fiorashreehan · 4 years

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a-study-in-ginny-archive · 7 years

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Passive-aggressive thoughts while watching ASP:

I’m a nitpicking jerk when it comes to movies, and I’m about to start watching the movie, so here goes:

• The hoods Brinker and the others are wearing, though. They took “Get thee to a nunnery” too seriously.

• How many people were at mock trial?? I counted at least 15.

• How would they punish him if they decided Gene was guilty, though

• Didn’t Finny refuse to wear pajamas in the book?

• Gene’s tie is crooked,,

• GENE’S ACCENT, NO.

• *stops in the middle of walkway to put jacket on* Gene, no.

• Why is Finny doing push-ups though. Everyone else is out walking around and doing stuff.

• Why would you say “we’re almost twins” to someone you just met??

• The school is only 130 years old, your family has not gone there for “centuries”, wtf did the screenwriters do.

• Chet’s character doesn’t exist in this, so that’s cool, I guess.

• Brinker, you’re a dick. Be nice to Leper’s snails.

• Leper’s voice when he says “You wouldn’t”. Bless that poor boy.

• Brinker, you’re a dick, holy shit.

• No one buttons their shirts normally here, I guess.

• Finny, you’re a bit of a dick too. What did the writers do to you.

• “Not that way, towards the lake,” he says as Gene’s already running the wrong way.

• Who’s speaking when someone says “Finny’s just making it up as usual”? No one’s mouth is moving.

• Okay, but blitzball actually looks really fun, though.

• Why is there a ladder and rope up to the tree when no one was allowed up there?

• “No, you go ahead and kill yourself if you want, not me.” Brinker is me @ life.

• They call him Fin. Did they call him that in the books? I don’t remember.

• Gene, you could’ve just unbuttoned your shirt, wtf.

• Finny, you two walk exactly the same way. “West Point Stride”, okay.

• Why the fuck y’all gotta single out Gene for, leave the poor boy alone.

• Finny, why do you always have a shirt or something on your radio.

• Leper, I love you and the others, but your guy’s dancing is awful.

• Also, why do these guys have a hitler costume? Is it close to Halloween? Was that allowed back then?

• Was it Lep or Brinker that planned the Hitler thing? I’m honestly wondering.

• Furthermore, seriously, why was that included?

• They have Finny’s terrible singing down, which is cool.

• FINNY’S SASS IS MY FAVORITE. “What in the hell is that??” “A shirt, dummy, haven’t you ever seen one before?”

• Gene’s worried about people thinking Finny’s gay because of the pink shirt, but Gene just stares at Finny for a solid ten seconds.

• Finny just BS’s his way through literally everything. That part is accurate.

• Gene’s just walking along the tree branch and just falls so dramatically. I feel like Hello Darkness, My Old Friend should be playing.

• Lung cancer.

• Yes, Finny, wake up everyone in the dorm, why don’t you.

• “Keep it up and everyone will be proud of you.” Didn’t know my English teacher was in this movie.

• holy shit, Gene can’t sing either

• It just occurred to me that Finny’s a really bad influence, lol.

• Let’s make a drinking time for this movie. Take a shot every time Gene states at Finny and every time Finny says something with gay undertones.

• Brinker, why must you do these things.

• Congrats, Brinker, you humiliated someone and he pushed someone out a tree. It’s a vicious cycle.

• The pain in Finny’s voice when he tells Gene to leave him alone, though.

• I just noticed that Finny’s taller than Gene. Ugh.

• Finny’s lowkey manipulative in this, though

• His dancing at the winter carnival is my aesthetic.

• Ah yes, Brinker Hadley, doing his thing and being smart and vaguely mean.

• GENE, BE NICE.

• GENE, THAT BOY IS S I C K , AND YOU JUST SMACKED HIM.

• G E N E P L E A S E

• Oh, I sense the trial.

• I, too, die after falling down twelve steps

• “I never cried after Finny’s death,” says Gene, who almost started bawling after seeing the empty side of the room.

• Brinker in Leper’s hat, though. That is precious.

• There was narration only at the beginning and end. Huh.

• I watched this movie solely to see Gene smack Quackenbush and it didn’t even happen.

#movie commentary #a separate peace #mod x being moody #as usual

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olivemeister · 7 years

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hxh prediction that i’m not sure whether i want to be legit or not re: gon and nen

gon won’t ever get his nen back. we know it’s not impossible based on what ging said, but ging also said it would be a hellish trial.

instead, we’ll follow a line from the chimera ant arc that has never been really elaborated on - meleoron saying he sensed something inhuman in gon.

here are some things we know (if i’m misremembering any of this please let me know):

meleoron cited this as a reason he sought gon out as a potential ally - because gon’s “something inhuman” resonated with him, as someone who was not human himself. meleoron explicitly reached out to gon because he felt kinship with him, and phrased it as a shared inhumanity.

ging’s ongoing quest that we finally have learned of centers around the dark continent and its inhabitants.

there exists a humanoid species that has served as “guides” for human expeditions to the dark continent.

the chimera ants themselves originate in the dark continent, and the queen seen in the series presumably washed up on the NGL shores having come directly from there.

ging’s ancestor don is believed to still be alive on the dark continent, and even if ging is wrong (unlikely imo) there is zero doubt that don freecss lived on the dark continent for quite some time. presumably, barring some wild twist, don is also gon’s ancestor.

chimera ants could not use nen until human DNA entered their gene pool.

theory 1: the freecss family in general is descended from a child born between don freecss and one of these “guides”*

theory 2: gon's mother** is descended from a/is a child born between a human and the “guide” species

theory 3: a variant on 1, with a significant change: despite the implications of the series, gon is not ging’s biological child and is a more direct descendant of don freecss. ging and mito are not descended from this pairing of don and a “guide”. finding gon (however it would have happened) would surely have been what cemented his belief that don is still alive. in this instance, ging would be gon’s father in that he adopted him and cared for him as a baby, but ging didn’t father him.

additional detail: gon speaks to mito after returning home, saying that ging didn’t feel like his father and he didn’t feel like ging’s son. he said that ging felt, instead, like some famous, distant relative.

theory 4: in don’s travels across the dark continent, he was changed by it and became something that couldn’t be called completely human. when he eventually sired a child, this alteration that came from spending a significant amount of time on the continent was passed on. the child remained or returned to the known world, and don continued his journey. this is not incompatible with theory 3′s other details - gon could still be a direct (or closer) descendant of don rather than being ging’s biological son.

either way, there’s the beginnings of evidence that could point to an alternative to nen for gon to use - the power of a dark continent being. we’ve already seen how devastating this power can be, and how it blows nen out of the water in nanika - at no point in the series is her wish-granting ability referred to as nen or a hatsu, merely “power”. it’s never stated that she uses aura either. and clearly the “restriction” of her power is not absolute and she can and does break it for killua.

there’s also no reason to not call it nen if it is in fact nen. is it a coincidence? maybe. it could be a slip-up as well and not a calculated thing. but it definitely seems like what nanika is doing is not utilizing nen. which gives us a prime opportunity, considering shonen conventions.

if gon is linked to the dark continent in some way (my knowledge of yyh leads me to think that theories 2 and 3 are the most likely), he’s primed to inherit a power the likes of which no human in the series could hope to obtain.

right in time for when he leaves the known world, travels to the dark continent, and returns to being the protagonist of the series, gon will gain a power that lets him keep up with the new struggles he’ll face when he goes.

if he does, of course.

*could be another species, but we already have a confirmed humanoid species existing in the right place at the right time in the unnamed “guide” species

**or other parent - it’s been phrased canonically as mother so i’m going with that until there’s evidence that the use of the word mother is inaccurate

ADDITIONAL EDIT: during the election arc, ging expresses his complete confidence that gon will recover. while there’s sufficient information (if only barely) to say it’s possible that ging knew about nanika, otherwise his faith that gon would be okay has not been explained and we’re left to just ponder if it was a hunch.

maybe it wasn’t. maybe ging knows that gon has another power locked away inside of him and thought it would either activate in this Hour Of Need or just sort of passively heal him over time. maybe this power is the only reason gon survived his vow/restriction in the first place, at least long enough for killua to reach him (both during the fighting and later with alluka and nanika). it’s hard to argue that gon wasn’t offering his life as part of the vow, his phrasing didn’t leave much wiggle room. he was planning to die, but he survived. withered away, yeah, but still alive in that cloud of miasma.

if he had traded all of his nen away...

then what was the haze lingering over gon?

#hxh meta stuff

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danger-honey · 3 years

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Thinking of a Tekken AU where there’s multiple special genes, not just the Devil gene. It wouldn’t differ much from canon, the other genes would be a way to explain some characters’ already existing supernatural elements and powers.

For example, Claudio would have the Sirius gene which allows him the ability to have starbursts

Vampire gene would explain Eliza being the way she is

Kunimitsu and her daughter would have the Fire gene for their ability to create flames out of their moves

Idk, its an idea that I’d like to entertain more, with more characteristics and rules for these genes in the future

#tekken #yeah im tired #also thinking how the genes are either passive or a state that has to get activated #the genes reveal body markings/tattoos once its active #pretty much like the devil gene #ok i’ll shush now

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admcp · 7 years

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IN: 0408

The world in 2384: Is it possible to achieve immortality? Netflix’s new original series Altered Carbon explores a world where, in just a few centuries, humans can live forever. WIRED asks the experts if that's true, then how do we get there?

“Artificial intelligence has even the world’s brightest minds concerned about how it could shape our future.”

On April 27, 2016, Philip Rosedale launched the idea for a new world, known as High Fidelity, where people could lead a second life through the lens of a virtual reality headset. It would be more realistic and much bigger than the previous parallel world he had created: “As big as Earth and beyond,” he predicted. “We are about to leave the real world behind.”

We’re now living in a time where we can lead entirely different lives from behind a screen in the comfort of our own homes. These new worlds are so immersive that the politics, economy, relationships and emotions behind milestone events are as genuine as if they were occurring in our physical lives. Eventually, some futurists predict we could be existing forever within these virtual worlds, by developing the technology to “upload” our thoughts onto hard drives, allowing them to live and interact in alternate realities. A new original series on Netflix, Altered Carbon, set in 2384, takes this one step further with human consciousness living forever, transferring our memories, thoughts and emotions from body to body as they wear out, universe to universe, so we could live on forever. WIRED takes a look at the next three centuries to explore whether this idea can become a tangible reality.

2018 In the past 50 years, mankind has travelled to the moon, successfully completed the first heart transplant, developed machines that can keep us alive and mapped the DNA blueprint for human life. We have created virtual realities, linked billions of people online, created virtual assistants and the internet of things. Entrepreneur Herman Narula has even built the matrix. His company Improbable has developed Spatial OS, the world’s first large-scale distributed operating system. The platform can be used to simulate potential futures – from relatively small issues such as how to solve traffic, to our generation’s biggest medical problems – by simulating biological systems. In Narula’s vision he is creating a decision-making platform, a “what if machine” where each model could be integrated and built on top of each other, creating a one-to-one virtual representation of the real world that researchers could use to run experiments.

Running prediction machines requires big data, and in 2018 big data is ubiquitous. We know companies use our data – what we buy online, where we are in the world, who our friends, partners, and family are and how we interact, what bills we pay or the games we play – to target us with advertising. But China is taking a less sneaky route by categorising each of their citizens using a Social Credit System. In her new book, Who Can You Trust? How Technology Brought Us Together and Why It Might Drive Us Apart, Rachel Botsman details how the State Council of China is planning to implement this scheme by 2020. “Imagine a system where all these behaviours are rated as either positive or negative and distilled into a single number, according to rules set by the government,” she writes. “That would create your Citizen Score and it would tell everyone whether or not you were trustworthy. Plus, your rating would be publicly ranked against that of the entire population and used to determine your eligibility for a mortgage or a job, where your children can go to school – or even just your chances of getting a date.”

To make big data possible, first you have to connect with the digital world. In 2007, our relationship with this became hyper-personal. Then CEO of Apple, Steve Jobs, revealed the smartphone, and it has since become a necessary part for convenient day to day living. In the same time frame, artificial intelligence has grown to become used in just about every industry. From recognising the faces of criminals and safeguarding our security, to allowing each of us to have our own virtual assistants and widening our access to healthcare, artificial intelligence has even the world’s brightest minds concerned about how it could shape our future. Professor Stephen Hawking is one of them. “The genie is out of the bottle. We need to move forward on artificial intelligence development, but we also need to be mindful of its very real dangers. I fear that AI may replace humans altogether. If people design computer viruses, someone will design AI that replicates itself. This will be a new form of life that will outperform humans.” In 2017, a bot called Libratus out-bluffed poker kingpins, another had taught itself to play chess without learning from a human how to play first.

We are now also living in a world where our lifespan is double what it was 100 years ago. Where a 40-year-old person was once considered to be nearing the end of their life in 1917, many are now living well into their eighties, with the oldest person to date living 122 years.

Our advancements in health, however, go beyond merely extending our years. Quality of life has improved for the better and babies who might not have survived a few decades ago are given a chance to thrive – those born as early as 22 weeks can see out the end of a normal gestation period outside of their mother’s body with the help of machines. In science fiction film Gattaca (Andrew Niccol, 1997), potential children are conceived by genetic manipulation to ensure they possess the best hereditary traits of their parents. The themes in films such as this are now a reality. For instance, parents struggling to conceive now have the option of in vitro fertilisation, while ethical bodies are debating whether we should be allowed to defy natural evolution in this way.

What’s perhaps most striking is our ability to manipulate machines by the use of our minds. In 2018, a breakthrough that will allow humans to control machines with their minds will go into clinical trials. Stentrode is a matchstick-sized device that can be inserted into the brain through blood vessels. It’s hoped it will help paralysed patients move by controlling their exoskeletons, effectively changing the the quality of life for people whose mobility is inhibited by their conditions.

In the last few decades we have reached a point where serious debate is being held about where the line is drawn between how we teach machines and how much they can learn on their own. In the next 150 years, some of the biggest technological advancements towards linking the two will be made on a massive and personal scale.

credit: worship.studio

“You’ll have the option of subsisting as a cloud-embedded planetary observer after your death.” - Jonathon Keats

2118 By this time, it’s predicted the Earth will be home to 10 billion humans, one of the only species to survive a mass extinction event as well as extreme changes in climate due to global warming. Just a century previous, Professor Hawking, advised seeking alternative planets for possible habitation: “We are running out of space on earth and we need to break through technological limitations preventing us living elsewhere in the universe.” A century after SpaceX led the charge to make autonomous vehicles the leading form of transportation, it has now moved on to launch and cultivate space colonies on Mars, while Nasa’s missions have finally broken through the barriers to allow humans to live permanently on other planets. By this time though, the planet’s are only open for development and research.

Futurologist Ian Pearson predicts that by the 2100s, back on planet Earth, the ability to communicate through thought transmission will be as easy as other forms of brain augmentation. “Picking up thoughts and relaying them to another brain will not be much harder than storing them on the net,” he predicted in 2012. He says by this point, we will be wiring our brains to computers to make them work faster. “By 2075 most people in the developed world will use machine augmentation of some sort for their brains and, by the end of the century, pretty much everyone will.”

Experimental philosopher and conceptual artist Jonathon Keats believes by this time, AI will have led us to achieve “passive mortality.” “By having a neural network follow everything you do from birth until death, an AI will be able to behave as you would in circumstances equivalent to those you have experienced,” he says. “At first this will be an unanticipated benefit of legacy systems (such as the fraud detection systems used by your bank), which will provide a decent proxy for your personality when artfully combined. By the late 2000s it will be marketed in its own right (immortality-as-a-service). The problem will be that it won’t work reliably in truly novel situations, and rampant climate change will make for an unprecedented level of global unpredictability. As a result, the technology will be used only passively: with your AI-captured personality embedded in an AI agent, you’ll have the option of subsisting as a cloud-embedded planetary observer after your death.”

Science fiction and fantasy writer and historian Ada Palmer, predicts that by 2118 our life expectancy will have increased by another 70 years. “Expansion of the body’s lifespan through medical advances such as gene therapy and other anti-ageing technologies make societies become accustomed to lifespans of 150 years or more,” she says. “The expectation that these can and should be expanded affects culture and identity, making people think of death as a problem to be solved rather than a natural inevitability, galvanising more research into how to expand lifespans even more and transcending the limits of the body. At around the same time, advances in neural network research and other computing advances make it possible to simulate neural systems as complicated as a human brain, though it is not yet practical to duplicate and ‘upload’ a real one.”

The creator of Black Mirror, Charlie Brooker, explores the possibility that so-called brain implants will be as essential to everyday life as a tablet or smartphone is in 2018. The implants sit behind the ear and sync up to an electronic contact lens that records and saves everything the body does. This means the history of each person is in their hands and can be accessed over and over again, adding to the collection of big data to replicate personalities.

“Efforts to house biological brains in robotic bodies further extend the potential lifespan of an organic brain” - Ada Palmer

2218 Herman Narula predicted that eventually humans will take to virtual worlds as an antidote to mass automation. By 2200, its possible that humans could live and work within virtual “gaming” worlds that are resistant to the AI-dominated workforce that would by now have overtaken the physical world. Outside of the virtual worlds, medicine has advanced so much our bodies have become perfectly engineered. Disease has been eradicated and babies are conceived through a series of options chosen by parents and collected from birthing stations nine months on. Continents have shifted and the world map looks unrecognisable. Meanwhile other planets are being established at a pace to accommodate billions more humans that arrive by space elevators, at one time only accessible to the super rich but now as common as cars once were. Lost animal and plant species are being revived by technological advancements and the environments they once lived in are recreated to ensure their survival.

Science-fiction writer Ada Palmer believes that we would be on track to uploading our brains onto clouds and hard drives, at a similar rate to what it was once possible to cryogenically freeze our bodies for long periods of time.

“The brain is mapped in sufficient detail that whole brains can be replicated in digital form, making it possible to create a computer intelligence that effectively replicates a person's memories, decision-making process etc, though in tests (such as puzzle solving or rock, paper, scissors, throw) the behaviour of the digital and original is usually not quite identical,” says Palmer. “People debate whether (A) the differences are caused by the digital and biological beings’ awareness of their own bodies/forms, if (B) this means there is still something about how neurons operate that we don't understand and are not simulating with sufficient detail, or (C) the original has a soul and the copy does not. Different societies and cultural groups have a range of reactions to this technology, and differ on whether a digital version of someone has the same civil and legal rights and status as the original, counts as a child/offspring, or even counts as a human being. Some people have digital copies kept paused to be activated only when they die, while others allow digital versions of themselves to run and collaborate with them while the biological version is still alive. Meanwhile efforts to house biological brains in robotic bodies further extend the potential lifespan of an organic brain, but does not yet make it infinite.”

Philosopher Jonathon Keats predicts the fight for immortality will be persistent and categorised by a series of failures that will ultimately leave people isolated and detached from reality. “Experiments in active immortality will persist even after two centuries of failure (from head transplants to synaptic scaffolds). As a result of these persistent efforts – and the eternal ambitions of the ultra-rich – the definition of immortality will change. It will become a matter of genetics (by way of human cloning) augmented by epigenetic therapy, in which your cloned self will be exposed to the same biochemical environment that you were, in order to turn genes on and off in the appropriate sequence. (Otherwise your clone would merely become an identical twin of yourself.) Experiences will also be replayed, since those have an epigenetic impact. These events will be delivered by a fully immersive VR, based on the perfect tracking of your sensory adventures from birth to death (initially a service offered by big technology companies). The problem will be that you’ll need to live in a perfect bubble, sealed off from the present world, which will be radically different and would hopelessly muddle your epigenetics, changing who you are. As a result, a select group of people will end up reliving their lives in isolation, over and over again, until their money runs out – but they’ll be totally detached from the present and ultimately irrelevant.”

“Your computer self can do something on Titan and you can then return that version of yourself to your biological body on Mars.” - Jonathon Keats

2384 By the 2300s the super rich will have finally achieved immortality – death will be a mere inconvenience. They will have left Earth as a dystopian wasteland, filled with sprawling neon cities while they perch above the clouds in mansions filled with relics from “elder civilisations.” In Netflix’s Altered Carbon, its possible to live for hundreds of years, across different universes that have been colonised in the centuries gone by. Human bodies will contain cortical stacks in their spinal columns that digitally store their memories and can be transferred to a new body, known as a sleeve. Re-sleeving will be a process open to everyone, but only the ultra-rich will be able to update over the course of their lives via a cloud storage system, meaning they can bypass the ageing process and choose bodies that are to their liking.

To get here, humans will have been through the typical trials and errors that have characterised their species for centuries. Ada Palmer believes the ultimate motivation to continue will come from humanity’s expansion through the solar system. “The long transit times to asteroids and the moons of Jupiter, will make computer intelligences increasingly desirable since programs can be sent at light speed from point to point in order to make business decisions or interact with friends, while physical bodies – whether robotic or biological – require months to complete the same trip,” she says. “The transformation of society from an Earth-centred to a multi-world system inadvertently creates the conditions for computerised intelligence to become the expected default human state, though some societies and individuals continue to reject it. In this period the most sought-after technology is one to let the ideas and memories of a digital copy be reintegrated into a biological original, so your computer self can do something on Titan and you can then return that version of yourself to your biological body on Mars. This technology proves challenging however, and ignites cultural anxieties, including the fear that the original mind is killed and replaced by the digital one, and concerns about the application of this to insert memories into the minds of others.”

Jonathon Keats sees the world in this century as similar to that of Altered Carbon in that our ability to live on forever will fundamentally shake social laws, morals and politics. “The passive immortals will be rediscovered after having been forgotten for more than a century. Millions will be found on legacy systems deep within 24th century server farms. By this point in history, the extent of any environmental crisis will be beyond an ordinary tech fix (partly exacerbated by centuries of tech fixes gone bad). In their desperation, some people will recognise the value of the passive immortals, appreciating their deep observations of long-term change from myriad points of view (since the observations of each, uninterrupted for centuries, will be coloured by their individual personalities). The virtual presence of the passive immortals will cause a sociopolitical schism, in which a society addicted to accelerating change confronts a fundamentally different philosophy of life,” he says.

Altered Carbon explores these new ways of social order through the murder of a wealthy man, Laurens Bancroft (James Purefoy) and his attempt to solve it himself by enlisting the help of the last surviving soldier, Takeshi Kovacs (Will Yun Lee, Joel Kinnaman) from an elite group of interstellar warriors who were defeated in an uprising against this new world order. The values and vices that humans have developed for thousands of years still remain – relationships, wealth, exploration, drugs, consumerism – but exist in spheres that blur natural human ability, machines and digital.

The next few hundred years? “The direction taken by society at this stage will determine whether the story continues into the 2400s and beyond,” says Keats.

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cathysims1 · 4 years

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The Psychology of Money – Changing your mindset

The Psychology of Money – Changing your mindset:

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It is important to understanding the psychology of money and changing your mindset because it doesn’t make sense to show you how to get out of debt unless you can change your mindset about what is possible for you. Once you change your mindset and you get out of debt, nothing can stop you.

Most of the time when we fail to achieve what we really want, there is an underlying belief (that we are usually not aware of) that is not supporting us. Have you ever experienced self-sabotage? Have you ever failed to follow through on something that you wanted to achieve? Most likely you had conflicting beliefs that were pulling you in different directions.

But what is a belief? A belief is a feeling of certainty about what something means to you. Most of our beliefs are generalizations about our past that are based on interpretations of our experiences. In other words, they are based on how we interpreted what happened to us at the moment. Let me give you an example. Twin brothers go to an amusement park and decide to take a ride on a roller-coaster together. One walks out of that ride feeling very happy and thrilled, and these effects will be positive over his lifetime. The other, however, walks out of that same ride full of fear and shock, and those effects will be negative for him over his lifetime. It was the same ride, but it was perceived differently by them. We all perceive and interpret our experiences in a different way.

Which brings us to another very important point that you should always remember: it is not what happens to us in life, but how we interpret what happens to us and what we decide to focus on that changes our life. We need to take responsibility for where we are in life, feel grateful for it, and move on. Blaming our situation or our “conditions” will only bring more of the same. By feeling grateful for what you have, whatever that maybe, you are actually impressing thoughts of abundance upon the Universe, and the Universe will deliver to you more abundance. It may sound strange to some people, but it is one of the immutable Laws of the Universe, the Law of Attraction.

But let’s go back to your beliefs and how they affect your life. They actually affect everything you do, since all your actions are the result of your beliefs. They are extremely important to achieving success in anything you do.

You see, from the day we are born, we are bombarded with negative suggestions. Not knowing how to counter them, we unconsciously accept them and bring them into being as our experience.

For example, we are told: – You cannot do it / You can’t do that – if you don’t wear a sweater, you will catch a cold

– You don’t have a chance

– Things are only getting worse – You may get fired

– You are not smart enough

And so on. Get the idea?

Consider now the fact that in 2017, about 16 percent of the American population was 65 years old or over; a figure which is expected to reach 22 percent by 2050. Many of them are broke. They are depending on someone else for life’s necessities.

Why is it that in the richest country in the world, 95% of the population ends up broke?

If you ask these people, they would tell you that their lives were shaped by exterior forces or circumstances, by things that happened to them. This implies that they were not in control, that they were merely a leaf in the wind.

But as we said before, and it’s so important that it is worth repeating, it is not what happens to us in life, but how we interpret what happens to us and what we decide to focus on that changes our life. A person’s fortune can be completely wiped out, and he or she can build it again with the right mindset. It has happened millions of times, which proves that it is NOT what happens to you but how you react to it.

The main reason that most people never achieve financial independence is that we are not taught how to succeed. We are not taught how to achieve financial independence. We are not taught how to handle money. We are never taught that WE are in charge of our lives.

The educational system in place today was created in the 1800s and was designed to prepare us to work as employees. In high school, we are not taught how to handle money, how to invest it, how to create passive streams of income. We don’t learn it either in College or University. We grow up (most of us, anyway) believing that money is in short supply, it is hard to come by and that you have to work really hard for it. We grow up associating different things to money like “If I have a lot of money, I may lose my friends,” thereby, “money equals loneliness.” Other common beliefs are “money changes people, they become greedy”, “If I make a lot of money, I could lose my motivation”. Or, “If I’m broke (or poor) people will pay more attention to me”. And the list goes on and on.

The fact is that money by itself is neither good nor bad. It is what we associate with money that makes all the difference in the world.

Many people live most of their lives under a set of beliefs that controlled most of what have done. It might take you a while to identify those beliefs, but when you do, you will realize that they had such an enormous power over you that they controlled your focus, your ideas, and your acts. Before you become aware of these beliefs, you will blame your circumstances on other people or “bad luck”.

There are several ways to change beliefs on purpose. The following method involves associating a lot of emotional pain to the old belief, and a lot of emotional pleasure to the new belief. This is a process you do only once for the belief to be replaced with an empowering one of your choice.

Now let’s start the process of changing our old beliefs. Let me warn you though, that just reading this exercise will not change anything in your life! You DO NEED to complete this exercise. Believe me, it will be fun, and it will not take long. And you can do it as many times as you want, any time you discover a belief that is not empowering you.

A way to identify a belief is this: they are usually found after the word “because”, on phrases you usually say. As an example, if you hear yourself saying something like, “I will always be fat, because my father and mother are overweight, and I have their genes”. Another example, “They wouldn’t give me that job, because I am not smart enough”. Or, “I could never succeed because I never succeeded before in my life”. Do you get the idea?

Let’s start with your limiting beliefs. Write down 5 beliefs that you have about yourself and what you are capable of. What are the five beliefs that have limited you in the past? i.e., “I could never make more than $50,000 a year”, “ I can’t get a better job”, “nobody would pay me that much”, etc.

1______________________________________________________

2______________________________________________________

3______________________________________________________

4______________________________________________________

5______________________________________________________

Now you write down 5 empowering beliefs that can now support you in achieving your goals. Do not limit yourself in your new beliefs. Think big, think bold! Also, and this is extremely important, state your beliefs in the affirmative, never state a belief that negates what you don’t want. Example: “My life is abundant” is a great example, but “I don’t have any more debt” is not, since it is not positive enough, and your brain will focus on “debt” instead of the “I don’t”. These new beliefs will replace the ones that have limited you before.

1______________________________________________________

2______________________________________________________

3______________________________________________________

4______________________________________________________

5______________________________________________________

Excellent! Feel grateful for taking this first step that can change your life for the better.

Now, get two pieces of paper. On the first piece of paper, write down the first limiting belief you are eliminating. What you are going to do first is create doubt. Once you start to doubt a belief, it becomes weak, making it easier to replace with another belief. Then, you are going to associate massive pain to have that belief, and a massive pain in the future if you continue to have that belief. In other words, you have to feel the negative emotions associated with living with that belief, and how it would negatively affect you. Then, on the other piece of paper, you are going to associate massive pleasure to the new belief that you want to adopt in its place.

This exercise is extremely powerful, so please, do yourself a favor and take it seriously. You can change your life now.

Let’s start with the first belief. You have already written this belief down on the first piece of paper; now ask yourself the following questions:

1- How is this belief ridiculous or absurd?

2- What negative consequences have you already experienced as a result of having this RIDICULOUS belief? What has it cost you emotionally, financially, physically, and in your relationships in the past, because of having this ABSURD belief?

3- What is it costing you now, emotionally, financially, physically, and in your relationships, because of having this WRONG belief?

4- What will it cost you emotionally, financially, physically, in your relationships, during the next 10 years, if you don’t let go of this belief now?

Write down everything that comes to your mind. Keep writing about all the pain you experienced in your past, all the pain you are experiencing right now, and all the pain you will be experiencing in the future if you don’t change this absurd belief now.

Make sure you feel as much pain as possible. Feel all the negative emotions associated with having this absurd belief. Close your eyes and visualize it, live it, feel it as if it were happening right now. I know this doesn’t sound very appealing, but believe me, you will be amazed at the results!

Once you are fully associated with the pain that having this belief has cost you and would have cost you your whole life, get the second piece of paper, and write down the new empowering belief that will take the place of the old one.

Ask yourself the following questions:

How will having this empowering belief affect my life?

What benefits will I get from having this empowering belief?

How will I feel and how will I act by having this empowering belief?

Where will I be in 10 years as a result of having this empowering belief?

Imagine yourself 10 years from now, and looking back at the last 10 years, how does it feel having lived with this empowering belief? Stay there for a while, feeling those great feelings.

While you are writing down each answer, make sure you fully associate with the positive feelings of having this empowering belief. Feel how much better your life is as a result of having this belief. Close your eyes and feel it in your body. How would you feel? How would you move? How would you breathe?

The key here is to experience as much pleasure as possible.

Now grab the first piece of paper containing your old beliefs, and burn it. As you see the paper burning, feel the old belief vanishing in your past, and feel the power of your new belief.

Congratulations! Feel grateful for having a great, empowering belief that will support you for the rest of your life.

Do the same with the next belief, and keep repeating until you finish replacing all your old beliefs.

This exercise was adapted from similar exercises by Anthony Robbins and Bob Proctor.

Another way to replace limiting beliefs Another way to change beliefs and counter negative suggestions that I use very frequently. It is incredibly powerful and it could help you keep focused on what you want.

In the movie “You can heal your life” by Louis Hayes, a person who got cured of cancer explained that she was repeating an affirmation 400 times a day. Four hundred times a day! That’s why it worked for her; her subconscious mind ended up believing what she was affirming.

The best way is to start the affirmations with “I’m so happy and grateful now that…” and fill in the blanks with whatever you want to achieve or get. Some examples could be:

“I’m so happy and grateful now that I’m driving my …. (name/model of the car you want)”

“I’m so happy and grateful now that I get up at 5:00 AM fully energized”

“I’m so happy and grateful now that I weigh 175 lbs (or whatever you want)

“I’m so happy and grateful now that my Credit Card is fully paid off”

“I’m so happy and grateful now that money comes easily and frequently”

Write down a list of affirmations and pick one to start with. Repeat your affirmation out loud, 200 to 400 times a day. It’s Ok to try different tones of voice since you will probably get tired after a while.

Changing your mindset

Remember what the definition of insanity is? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

If you want things to change, YOU have to change first. You can be in control of your life by choosing what to focus on most of the time.

Successful people choose to focus on positive things; unsuccessful people focus on negative things by default.

So do what successful people do:

Spend most of your time focusing on positive things, NOT on negative things.

Focus on what you want to achieve, NOT on what you do not want to achieve.

Focus on what you like, NOT on what you don’t like.

This does not mean you ignore your problems. Acknowledge your problems, but don’t dwell on them.

Be thankful for the problem since, most likely, it is an opportunity in disguise. You can find the greatest opportunities of your life “hidden” in your worst moments. That’s why all successful people see problems as opportunities.

Reframe every “difficulty”. That means that you find the good in a seemingly “bad” situation.

Always focus on abundance, not lack or problems. Focus on wealth building, not surviving. Focus on your next check, not your last one.

When you find yourself thinking about the negative aspects of your life, immediately replace the negative thoughts with a positive one, like a mantra. If you catch yourself saying, “I can’t afford it,” immediately say “I couldn’t afford it in the past, but I can afford it now. I just choose not to buy it at this time,” or something similar. You don’t have to believe it yet. You can “fake it ‘til you make it.”

Feel abundance in your life and be grateful for your abundance. What you focus on expands. If you focus on lack, it expands. When you focus on abundance, it expands as well.

Remember, abundance isn’t just about money. You may have an abundance of friends, health, faith, or ideas. Look at nature. Everywhere you turn there is abundance. Life, by its very nature, is abundant. Just open your eyes; open your mind.

Of course, this is easier said than done, so how to start?

There are several things you can do right away:

Start meditating every day. Even if you don’t know how to meditate, at least find a quiet spot, sit comfortably, close your eyes, and breathe deeply. Focus on your breathing. Stay like this for a few minutes, and avoid any thoughts; just focus on your breathing. Then visualize a goal you want to achieve, and feel as if you have already achieved it. FEEL what it feels like to have achieved that goal. Make it as real as possible. Touch it, feel it, smell it, see it. Stay in that feeling for a few minutes, and thank the Universe for having achieved it. This is probably the most powerful exercise you can do to become successful.

Read positive books, every single day. At least read for 15 minutes, preferably for 30 minutes or more. I always read before going to bed, so I can go to sleep with positive thoughts and feelings.

Listen to positive CDs in your car instead of music (or what’s worse, the news!)

Avoid the news, negative people, negative movies, negative talk shows, and anything that will affect you negatively. Feed your mind with positive things every day.

Feel genuinely grateful for what you have. FEEL deep feelings of gratitude. This is incredibly powerful, so do not take it lightly. Feel grateful for anything you have, your car (even if you don’t like it, still feel grateful for having it), your kids, your spouse, a flower, etc. Feel grateful every day. Write down a list of things you are grateful for, and as you are writing, feel the gratitude. Do it for 5-10 minutes every day. Make sure that as soon as you wake up, you think about things to be grateful for. It’s the best way to start your day!

Surround yourself with positive people that inspire you. This is very important! One way could be to start a mastermind group, where all of you can share ideas and support each other. You can either meet at somebody’s house once a week or at a restaurant. You can even do a conference call once a week if some of you live in different cities. You can also find a mentor that can help you stay focused or new friends that share the same goals.

Feel the abundance that surrounds you. Even if at this moment you don’t have the money you want, you can find abundance if you look for it. Abundance is not just money; abundance is everywhere. Maybe you have an abundance of love? Or an abundance of friends? Look for abundance in Nature. Look at the ocean, you will see abundance. Look at trees, you will see abundance. Just FEEL abundance instead of lack, and you will attract it.

Take workshops when possible, take classes if you can. Find an Adult School. Their classes are free.

You can make your life a masterpiece. Just focus on it, every day. And always, ALWAYS, be grateful for what you have.

There is NOTHING that you cannot be, do, or have. You are a magnificent human being with unlimited potential. Do not settle for mediocrity, you deserve more!

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thefourthbranch · 4 years

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4/21/2020: Liberty Without Spiritual Awareness is Impossible It was recently revealed at a White House briefing that individuals have been counted against the death toll of the Coronavirus who have not died from the Coronavirus but, rather, from other ailments. And they were counted simply because they had also tested positive for the Coronavirus. Then, on Tucker Carlson Tonight (4/13/20) Tucker cited statistics from the NY City Department of Public Health (5 p.m. 4/12/20) that of the 6,182 deaths in N.Y. City only 128 had no known underlying conditions when they arrived at hospital. Out of the 222 deaths in the age group from 18 to 44 only 26 had no underlying condition. Now, anyone who has been paying attention to the numbers from the beginning, has known that the number of cases being reported have been minimized to the point of insulting absurdity. Unfortunately, most people with common sense were not paying attention to the numbers until after the elephant sat on us with the imposition of Marshall Law. Why? Because your common sense told you that this was just the latest example of the media proving the accuracy of the old Eagles song about the media entitled, "Dirty Laundry." If you're not familiar with that song, look it up and you will get the point. Now we know that the number of deaths have been inflated while the number of cases have been criminally fractionalized. The end result of the number of deaths being inflated, divided by the number of cases which has been criminally fractionalized, has resulted in a deceptive and wholly inaccurate mortality rate which has created an unjustified panic among the citizenry. The question is, how could the 'experts' avoid being aware of this flawed equation? There are only two possible explanations. Either they are incapable of doing simple math and applying common sense to the equation, or, they are engaged and a nefarious effort to wield power and subjugate the citizenry. In either case, incompetency or nefarious agenda, why do we trust them to do anything on our behalf? Why do we continue to passively submit to their tyrannical, dictatorial solutions? Why? Because, while it used to be that so many people believed that it is the government's responsibility to take care of us from cradle to grave, now, it seems, we have reached the intolerable state where so many expect the government is supposed to take care of us from the cradle to eternity. Simply put, it seems that a great many Americans have lost sight of the fact that we're all going to die. It is a natural part of life and to assume that government can stop the process assumes that government possesses abilities that no man or collection of men will ever possess. In the aftermath of a tornado passing through my neighborhood recently, my brother and I were discussing the need for preparation to allow for all possible calamities, man made or natural. With regard to man made calamities caused by oppressive government he made the point that spiritual preparation was perhaps the most important. I agreed and my response was, Liberty without spiritual awareness is impossible. The Coronavirus, and more to the point, the reaction of the citizenry in support of the imposition of Marshall Law reveals the truth in that statement. God structured nature in such a way as to facilitate the weeding of the gene pool through viruses, diseases, famines (all to often created by tyrannical man) and war. Spiritual awareness allows us to recognize the value of God's plan, as it weeds out the weak and maximizes the strong. Yet, so many of our citizens who regard themselves as spiritual place their faith in the ability of man, through modern medicine, to nullify God's plan. And they believe that this is wise. How arrogant are they to believe that man is superior in thinking and wisdom to God. Such arrogance is not evidence of spiritual awareness, it is evidence of spiritual confusion. The good news is that in the end God's superior plan will prevail over man's confusion and arrogance. The question is, will man's confusion and arrogance result in tyranny prevailing over Liberty and the innate rights of the sovereign individual? So far, tyranny is winning! In my book, We of Mind and Reason, I discuss at length the need for absolutes to guide us. Absolutes are rooted in spiritual awareness and it was such awareness that kept previous generations of Americans grounded in reality. Please go to the home page of this website and purchase a copy of We of Mind and Reason. Please join the ranks of We of Mind and Reason, The Constitutional Patriots of America, and become a voice for history's greatest instrument of Liberty, the Constitution of the United States. Thank you, and God bless America! Rick Chase

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kroccies · 5 years

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3 Smoking Smoking Everyone knows that smoking is harmful to health. However, every smoker thinks that the consequences of smoking will not affect him, and he lives today, not thinking about the diseases that will inevitably appear in him in 10-20 years. It is known that sooner or later you will have to pay for each bad habit with your health. Smoking is associated with up to 90% of mortality from lung cancer, 75% of bronchitis and 25% of coronary heart disease among men under 65 years of age. Smoking or passive inhalation of tobacco smoke can cause infertility in women. Atrophy and destruction of the white matter of the brain and spinal cord with multiple sclerosis is more pronounced in patients who smoked at least 6 months during their life compared to never smoked patients.Tobacco addiction can be either psychological or physical. With psychological dependence, a person reaches for a cigarette when he is in a smoking company, or in a state of stress, nervous tension, to stimulate mental activity. With physical dependence, the body’s demand for a nicotine dose is so strong that the smoker’s attention is focused on finding a cigarette; the idea of smoking becomes so obsessive that most other needs go by the wayside. It becomes impossible to concentrate on anything other than a cigarette; apathy and unwillingness to do something may occur.2 Alcohol Alcohol Alcohol is present in almost every person’s life. Someone drinks only on holidays, someone likes to relax with a drink of alcohol on the weekend, and someone abuses the alcoholic constantly. Under the influence of ethanol, which is found in alcoholic beverages, everything collapses, primarily the nervous and cardiovascular systems. Weak muscles, blood clots in the vessels, diabetes, a shrunken brain, a swollen liver, weakened kidneys, impotence, depression, a stomach ulcer are just a partial list of what you can get from regular beer consumption or something stronger. Any portion of alcohol is a blow to the intellect, to health, to the future.A bottle of vodka drunk in an hour can kill you on the spot, in the literal sense. Next time, before you drink 100 grams, imagine your body dying slowly under the influence of ethanol while you have fun. Imagine that your cells are slowly suffocating, that the brain, saving itself, blocks a lot of brain centers, because of which there is incoherent speech, violation of spatial sensation, impaired coordination of movements and memory lapses. Imagine how your blood thickens, forms deadly blood clots, how the blood sugar level goes off scale, how the brain structures responsible for intelligence and quickness die, how alcohol burns through the walls of the stomach, forming non-healing ulcers.1 Drugs Drugs The use of drugs leads to severe violations, primarily the mental and physical functions of the body. In modern society, few people do not know about the dangers of drugs, but, despite this, they still attract people, becoming destructive for many. People who use drugs have insomnia, dry mucous membranes, nasal congestion, trembling hands, and the pupils become unusually wide, not responding to changes in the brightness of the eyes.A drug is poison, it slowly destroys the human brain, its psyche. They either die from a broken heart, or because their nasal septum becomes thinner, which leads to fatal bleeding. When using, for example, LSD, a person loses the ability to navigate in space, he has a feeling that he is able to fly and, having believed in his abilities, jumps from the top floor. All addicts do not live long, regardless of the type of drug used. They lose the instinct of self-preservation, which leads to the fact that about 60% of drug addicts, during the first two years after becoming familiar with drugs, attempt suicide. Many of them succeed.12 most bad habits of man Bad habits prevent a person from successfully realizing himself as a person. Most of these habits negatively affect either a person with such a habit, or people around him. In any case, you need to try to cope with this problem as quickly and efficiently as possible so that it never again bothers you or those around you. In this ranking, we will talk about the most harmful habits and addictions.

12 Profanity Profanity To some, profanity may not seem like such a bad habit, but just an element of the language, which has recently been used by more and more people. Even on the airs of many programs you can hear the “kick” of the mat. Using obscene language not only shows disrespect for those present, but can also become a habit when obscene words slip through every 5-6 words. Such behavior is unacceptable in a cultural society, and even more so in the presence of children who repeat everything after adults.

11 Coffeemania Coffeemania Coffee is a very popular and beloved drink by many, but its frequent use can also be called a bad habit. Coffee is able to exacerbate hypertension, some gastrointestinal diseases, is absolutely unacceptable in most cardiovascular diseases and with damage to the retina. But all this is true only when coffee is clearly overdoing it. You definitely can’t drink coffee with alcohol and mixed with tobacco smoke. This is a big hit for the cardiovascular system. In general, as with any other meal, coffee should not be overdone. Everything is good in moderation.

10 lack of sleep Lack of sleep Sleep is a vital necessity. Its absence leads to serious health problems. Symptoms of lack of sleep can be: dark circles under the eyes, slight swelling of the face and loss of skin tone throughout the body, the occurrence of unjustified irritability, low concentration and distraction. There may also be a jump in blood pressure, a fast heartbeat, loss of appetite and stomach problems. A person completely loses an adequate reaction to what is happening around. The protective function of the body is weakened, a delayed reaction to external factors occurs, which provokes low productivity. Gastritis, stomach ulcer, hypertension, and sometimes even obesity - these are companions of those who are forced to stay awake for a long time.

9 Diets Diets The harm to diets lies in the fact that after sitting for some time on them, the body will restructure its work and slow down metabolism, and when a person starts eating again, fat is deposited not only where it was before, but also in new places, in organs, which harm them . It happens that a person goes on a diet without taking into account his health, than he harms his body. Due to the constant changes in the body, the functioning of the heart, joints and the immune system can suffer from our nutrition. Often, because of diets, spending money on foods and time on their preparation increases. In terms of psychological stress, diets are also very harmful. Possible suffering from failure, the associated feelings of guilt and shame, the pain inflicted by ridicule by colleagues and family, the feeling of weakness, inability to pull myself together. All this is difficult to experience and sometimes leads to depression to a greater extent than the very presence of excess weight and the associated inconvenience.

8 Uncontrolled use of drugs Uncontrolled use of drugs More than 30 thousand people die of various resistant diseases every year. The unreasonable use of antibiotics leads to an increase in mortality, as the number of severe forms and complications of infectious diseases increases due to the developed resistance of microorganisms to antimicrobials. In fact, antibiotics simply lose their effectiveness. For example, at the beginning of the antibiotic era, a steptococcal infection was treated with penicillin. And now streptococci have an enzyme that decomposes penicillin. If earlier it was possible to get rid of some diseases with a single injection, now a long course of treatment is required. Disease resistance to antibiotics is due to the fact that these drugs are affordable and cheap, sold over the counter. Therefore, many people buy antibiotics and take them for any infection.

Many interrupt the course of treatment prescribed by the doctor immediately after the symptoms are removed, and those microorganisms that have become resistant to these antibiotics remain in the body. These germs will multiply rapidly and pass on their antibiotic resistance genes. Another negative side of the uncontrolled use of antibiotics is the rampant growth of fungal infections. Since drugs suppress the body’s natural microflora, those infections that our immunity had previously not allowed to multiply begin to rampage. 7 Internet addiction and computer games Internet addiction and computer games Computer addiction is a broad term for a large number of behavioral and drive control problems. The main types that were identified in the research process are characterized as follows: an irresistible attraction to visit porn sites and engage in cybersex, addiction to virtual acquaintances and redundancy of acquaintances and friends on the Web, playing online gambling and constant purchases or participating in auctions, endless travels on the web in search of information, an obsessive game of computer games.Gambling may seem like a bad habit for adolescents, but it is not. Adults are equally affected. Network reality allows you to simulate a creative state due to the limitless possibilities of searching and making discoveries. And most importantly, surfing the net gives you the feeling of being in a “stream” - complete immersion in action, turning off from external reality with the feeling of being in another world, another time, another dimension. Since there is no official diagnosis of computer addiction, the criteria for its treatment have not yet been sufficiently developed.6 Gambling gambling addiction This disease is associated with addiction to all kinds of gambling, such as casinos, slot machines, cards and interactive games. Gambling can manifest itself as a disease and, which happens much more often, as one of the symptoms of another mental illness: depression, manic states, even schizophrenia. The main symptoms of gambling addiction are an obsessive desire to constantly play. It is impossible to distract a person from the game, more often than not he forgets to eat elementary, becomes closed. The circle of communication is sharply reduced, and changes almost completely, and human behavior is changing, moreover, not for the better. Often there are all kinds of mental disorders. Usually, initially a person experiences a sensation of an upsurge of strength, later they are replaced by terrible depression and decadent moods. The disease of gambling, as well as other diseases, is treatable. Although getting rid of it is incredibly difficult. This may take even years. After all, gambling has a similar psychological nature to smoking.5 promiscuous sex life Promiscuous sex life Some men and women are not at all ashamed of having a sex life, so they, by all means, try to get sensual pleasure, having sex with different partners. One researcher, studying the sexuality of adolescents, noted that in personal conversations with many adolescents who have an erratic sex life, it turned out that, in their opinion, they live without a goal and are not very happy with themselves. In addition, he found that promiscuous young people suffer from “self-doubt and lack of self-esteem” the next morning. Often, those who have entered into an unlawful sexual relationship change their relationship to each other. The young man may find that his feelings for the girl are somewhat cooler and she is not even as attractive as he thought. In turn, a girl may have a feeling that she was treated as a thing.Promiscuous sex life is often the cause of sexually transmitted diseases. The vast majority of patients become infected as a result of their own sexual licentiousness, entering into casual sexual relations, promiscuous sexual life, that is, in violation of the established norms of socialist morality. As a rule, a person prone to premarital and extramarital sex, is not demanding of himself in other respects: he abuses alcohol, is selfish, is indifferent to the fate of his relatives and to the work performed.4 Malnutrition and gluttony Malnutrition and gluttony For many people, overeating is a real problem. In severe food dependence, the advice of a nutritionist is sometimes not enough, the support of a psychologist, the supervision of a therapist, an endocrinologist and other specialists are required. The causes of overeating are often difficult to identify and diagnose. Overeating leads to the fact that all organs and systems are overstrained. This leads to their wear and provokes the development of various diseases. Overeating and gluttony always turns into problems of the gastrointestinal tract. Overeating inevitably affects the condition of the skin, on which acne, blackheads appear. Needless to say, the overeating person is useless not only for those around him, but also for himself. As a result, the desire to move, to talk disappears. There can be no talk of any sport. I just want to go to bed and nothing more. 3 Smoking Smoking Everyone knows that smoking is harmful to health. However, every smoker thinks that the consequences of smoking will not affect him, and he lives today, not thinking about the diseases that will inevitably appear in him in 10-20 years. It is known that sooner or later you will have to pay for each bad habit with your health. Smoking is associated with up to 90% of mortality from lung cancer, 75% of bronchitis and 25% of coronary heart disease among men under 65 years of age. Smoking or passive inhalation of tobacco smoke can cause infertility in women. Atrophy and destruction of the white matter of the brain and spinal cord with multiple sclerosis is more pronounced in patients who smoked at least 6 months during their life compared to never smoked patients.Tobacco addiction can be either psychological or physical. With psychological dependence, a person reaches for a cigarette when he is in a smoking company, or in a state of stress, nervous tension, to stimulate mental activity. With physical dependence, the body’s demand for a nicotine dose is so strong that the smoker’s attention is focused on finding a cigarette; the idea of smoking becomes so obsessive that most other needs go by the wayside. It becomes impossible to concentrate on anything other than a cigarette; apathy and unwillingness to do something may occur.2 Alcohol Alcohol Alcohol is present in almost every person’s life. Someone drinks only on holidays, someone likes to relax with a drink of alcohol on the weekend, and someone abuses the alcoholic constantly. Under the influence of ethanol, which is found in alcoholic beverages, everything collapses, primarily the nervous and cardiovascular systems. Weak muscles, blood clots in the vessels, diabetes, a shrunken brain, a swollen liver, weakened kidneys, impotence, depression, a stomach ulcer are just a partial list of what you can get from regular beer consumption or something stronger. Any portion of alcohol is a blow to the intellect, to health, to the future.A bottle of vodka drunk in an hour can kill you on the spot, in the literal sense. Next time, before you drink 100 grams, imagine your body dying slowly under the influence of ethanol while you have fun. Imagine that your cells are slowly suffocating, that the brain, saving itself, blocks a lot of brain centers, because of which there is incoherent speech, violation of spatial sensation, impaired coordination of movements and memory lapses. Imagine how your blood thickens, forms deadly blood clots, how the blood sugar level goes off scale, how the brain structures responsible for intelligence and quickness die, how alcohol burns through the walls of the stomach, forming non-healing ulcers.1 Drugs Drugs The use of drugs leads to severe violations, primarily the mental and physical functions of the body. In modern society, few people do not know about the dangers of drugs, but, despite this, they still attract people, becoming destructive for many. People who use drugs have insomnia, dry mucous membranes, nasal congestion, trembling hands, and the pupils become unusually wide, not responding to changes in the brightness of the eyes.A drug is poison, it slowly destroys the human brain, its psyche. They either die from a broken heart, or because their nasal septum becomes thinner, which leads to fatal bleeding. When using, for example, LSD, a person loses the ability to navigate in space, he has a feeling that he is able to fly and, having believed in his abilities, jumps from the top floor. All addicts do not live long, regardless of the type of drug used. They lose the instinct of self-preservation, which leads to the fact that about 60% of drug addicts, during the first two years after becoming familiar with drugs, attempt suicide. Many of them succeed.

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insession-io · 5 years

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The Minds of Plants

At first glance, the Cornish mallow (Lavatera cretica) is little more than an unprepossessing weed. It has pinkish flowers and broad, flat leaves that track sunlight throughout the day. However, it’s what the mallow does at night that has propelled this humble plant into the scientific spotlight. Hours before the dawn, it springs into action, turning its leaves to face the anticipated direction of the sunrise. The mallow seems to remember where and when the Sun has come up on previous days, and acts to make sure it can gather as much light energy as possible each morning. When scientists try to confuse mallows in their laboratories by swapping the location of the light source, the plants simply learn the new orientation.

What does it even mean to say that a mallow can learn and remember the location of the sunrise? The idea that plants can behave intelligently, let alone learn or form memories, was a fringe notion until quite recently. Memories are thought to be so fundamentally cognitive that some theorists argue that they’re a necessary and sufficient marker of whether an organism can do the most basic kinds of thinking. Surely memory requires a brain, and plants lack even the rudimentary nervous systems of bugs and worms.

However, over the past decade or so this view has been forcefully challenged. The mallow isn’t an anomaly. Plants are not simply organic, passive automata. We now know that they can sense and integrate information about dozens of different environmental variables, and that they use this knowledge to guide flexible, adaptive behaviour.

For example, plants can recognise whether nearby plants are kin or unrelated, and adjust their foraging strategies accordingly. The flower Impatiens pallida, also known as pale jewelweed, is one of several species that tends to devote a greater share of resources to growing leaves rather than roots when put with strangers – a tactic apparently geared towards competing for sunlight, an imperative that is diminished when you are growing next to your siblings. Plants also mount complex, targeted defences in response to recognising specific predators. The small, flowering Arabidopsis thaliana, also known as thale or mouse-ear cress, can detect the vibrations caused by caterpillars munching on it and so release oils and chemicals to repel the insects.

Plants also communicate with one another and other organisms, such as parasites and microbes, using a variety of channels – including ‘mycorrhizal networks’ of fungus that link up the root systems of multiple plants, like some kind of subterranean internet. Perhaps it’s not really so surprising, then, that plants learn and use memories for prediction and decision-making.

What does learning and memory involve for a plant? An example that’s front and centre of the debate is vernalisation, a process in which certain plants must be exposed to the cold before they can flower in the spring. The ‘memory of winter’ is what helps plants to distinguish between spring (when pollinators, such as bees, are busy) and autumn (when they are not, and when the decision to flower at the wrong time of year could be reproductively disastrous).

In the biologists’ favourite experimental plant, A thaliana, a gene called FLC produces a chemical that stops its little white blooms from opening. However, when the plant is exposed to a long winter, the by-products of other genes measure the length of time it has been cold, and close down or repress the FLC in an increasing number of cells as the cold persists. When spring comes and the days start to lengthen, the plant, primed by the cold to have low FLC, can now flower. But to be effective, the anti-FLC mechanism needs an extended chilly spell, rather than shorter periods of fluctuating temperatures.

This involves what’s called epigenetic memory. Even after vernalised plants are returned to warm conditions, FLC is kept low via the remodelling of what are called chromatin marks. These are proteins and small chemical groups that attach to DNA within cells and influence gene activity. Chromatin remodelling can even be transmitted to subsequent generations of divided cells, such that these later produced cells ‘remember’ past winters. If the cold period has been long enough, plants with some cells that never went through a cold period can still flower in spring, because the chromatin modification continues to inhibit the action of FLC.

But is this really memory? Plant scientists who study ‘epigenetic memory’ will be the first to admit that it’s fundamentally different from the sort of thing studied by cognitive scientists. Is this use of language just metaphorical shorthand, bridging the gap between the familiar world of memory and the unfamiliar domain of epigenetics? Or do the similarities between cellular changes and organism-level memories reveal something deeper about what memory really is?

Both epigenetic and ‘brainy’ memories have one thing in common: a persistent change in the behaviour or state of a system, caused by an environmental stimulus that’s no longer present. Yet this description seems too broad, since it would also capture processes such as tissue damage, wounding or metabolic changes. Perhaps the interesting question isn’t really whether or not memories are needed for cognition, but rather which types of memories indicate the existence of underlying cognitive processes, and whether these processes exist in plants. In other words, rather than looking at ‘memory’ itself, it might be better to examine the more foundational question of how memories are acquired, formed or learned.

When the plant was dropped from a height, it learned that this was harmless and didn’t demand a folding response.

‘The plants remember,’ said the behavioural ecologist Monica Gagliano in a recent radio interview, ‘they know exactly what’s going on.’ Gagliano is a researcher at the University of Western Australia, who studies plants by applying behavioural learning techniques developed for animals. She reasons that if plants can produce the results that lead us to believe other organisms can learn and remember, we should similarly conclude that plants share these cognitive capacities. One form of learning that’s been studied extensively is habituation, in which creatures exposed to an unexpected but harmless stimulus (a noise, a flash of light) will have a cautionary response that slowly diminishes over time. Think of entering a room with a humming refrigerator: it’s initially annoying, but usually you’ll get used to it and perhaps not even notice after a while. True habituation is stimulus-specific, so with the introduction of a different and potentially dangerous stimulus, the animal will be re-triggered. Even in a humming room, you will probably startle at the sound of a loud bang. This is called dishabituation, and distinguishes genuine learning from other kinds of change, such as fatigue.

In 2014, Gagliano and her colleagues tested the learning capacities of a little plant called Mimosa pudica, a creeping annual also known as touch-me-not. Its name comes from the way its leaves snap shut defensively in response to a threat. When Gagliano and her colleagues dropped M pudica from a height (something the plant would never have encountered in its evolutionary history), the plants learned that this was harmless and didn’t demand a folding response. However, they maintained responsiveness when shaken suddenly. Moreover, the researchers found that M pudica’s habitation was also context-sensitive. The plants learnt faster in low-lit environments, where it was more costly to close their leaves because of the scarcity of light and the attendant need to conserve energy. (Gagliano’s research group was not the first to apply behavioural learning approaches to plants such as M pudica, but earlier studies were not always well-controlled so findings were inconsistent.)

But what about more complex learning? Most animals are also capable of conditioned or associative learning, in which they figure out that two stimuli tend to go hand in hand. This is what allows you to train your dog to come when you whistle, since the dog comes to associate that behaviour with treats or affection. In another study, published in 2016, Gagliano and colleagues tested whether Pisum sativum, or the garden pea, could link the movement of air with the availability of light. They placed seedlings at the base of a Y-maze, to be buffeted by air coming from only one of the forks – the brighter one. The plants were then allowed to grow into either fork of the Y-maze, to test whether they had learned the association. The results were positive – showing that the plants learned the conditioned response in a situationally relevant manner.

The evidence is mounting that plants share some of the treasured learning capacities of animals. Why has it taken so long to figure this out? We can start to understand the causes by running a little experiment. Take a look at this image. What does it depict?

Most people will respond either by naming the general class of animals present (‘dinosaurs’) and what they are doing (‘fighting’, ‘jumping’), or if they are dinosaur fans, by identifying the specific animals (‘genus Dryptosaurus’). Rarely will the mosses, grasses, shrubs and trees in the picture get a mention – at most they might be referred to as the background or setting to the main event, which comprises the animals present ‘in a field’.

In 1999, the biology educators James Wandersee and Elisabeth Schussler called this phenomenon plant blindness – a tendency to overlook plant capacities, behaviour and the unique and active environmental roles that they play. We treat them as part of the background, not as active agents in an ecosystem.

Some reasons for plant blindness are historical – philosophical hangovers from long-dismantled paradigms that continue to infect our thinking about the natural world. Many researchers still write under the influence of Aristotle’s influential notion of the scala naturae, a ladder of life, with plants at the bottom of the hierarchy of capacity and value, and Man at the peak. Aristotle emphasised the fundamental conceptual divide between immobile, insensitive plant life, and the active, sensory realm of animals. For him, the divide between animals and humankind was just as stark; he didn’t think animals thought, in any meaningful way. After the reintroduction of such ideas into Western European education in the early 1200s and throughout the Renaissance, Aristotelean thinking has remained remarkably persistent.

It’s often adaptive for humans to treat plants as object-like, or simply filter them out.

Today, we might call this systematic bias against non-animals zoochauvinism. It’s well-documented in the education system, in biology textbooks, in publication trends, and media representation. Furthermore, children growing up in cities tend to lack exposure to plants through interactive observation, plant care, and a situated plant appreciation and knowledge by acquaintance.

Particularities of the way our bodies work – our perceptual, attentional and cognitive systems – contribute to plant blindness and biases. Plants don’t usually jump out at us suddenly, present an imminent threat, or behave in ways that obviously impact upon us. Empirical findings show that they aren’t detected as often as animals, they don’t capture our attention as quickly, and we forget them more readily than animals. It’s often adaptive to treat them as object-like, or simply filter them out. Furthermore, plant behaviour frequently involves chemical and structural changes that are simply too small, too fast or too slow for us to perceive without equipment.

As we are animals ourselves, it’s also easier for us to recognise animal-like behaviour as behaviour. Recent findings in robotics indicate that human participants are more likely to attribute properties such as emotion, intentionality and behaviour to systems when those systems conform to animal or human-like behaviour. It seems that, when we’re deciding whether to interpret behaviour as intelligent, we rely on anthropomorphic prototypes. This helps to explain our intuitive reluctance to attribute cognitive capacities to plants.

But perhaps prejudice is not the only reason that plant cognition has been dismissed. Some theorists worry that concepts such as ‘plant memory’ are nothing but obfuscating metaphors. When we try to apply cognitive theory to plants in a less vague way, they say, it seems that plants are doing something quite unlike animals. Plant mechanisms are complex and fascinating, they agree, but not cognitive. There’s a concern that we’re defining memory so broadly as to be meaningless, or that things such as habituation are not, in themselves, cognitive mechanisms.

One way of probing the meaning of cognition is to consider whether a system trades in representations. Generally, representations are states that are about other things, and can stand in for those things. A set of coloured lines can form a picture representing a cat, as does the word ‘cat’ on this page. States of the brain are also generally taken to represent parts of our environment, and so to enable us to navigate the world around us. When things go awry with our representations, we might represent things that aren’t there at all, such as when we hallucinate. Less drastically, sometimes we get things slightly wrong, or misrepresent, parts of the world. I might mishear lyrics in amusing ways (sometimes called ‘mondegreens’), or startle violently thinking that a spider is crawling on my arm, when it’s only a fly. The capacity to get it wrong in this way, to misrepresent something, is a good indication that a system is using information-laden representations to navigate the world; that is, that it’s a cognitive system.

When we create memories, arguably we retain of some of this represented information for later use ‘offline’. The philosopher Francisco Calvo Garzón at the University of Murcia in Spain has argued that, for a physical state or mechanism to be representational, it must ‘stand for things or events that are temporarily unavailable’. The capacity for representations to stand in for something that’s not there, he claims, is the reason that memory is taken to be the mark of cognition. Unless it can operate offline, a state or mechanism is not genuinely cognitive.

The mallow learns a new location when plant physiologists mess with its ‘head’ by changing the light’s direction.

On the other hand, some theorists allow that certain representations can only operate ‘online’ – that is, they represent and track parts of the environment in real time. The mallow’s nocturnal capacity to predict where the Sun will rise, before it even appears, seems to involve ‘offline’ representations; other heliotropic plants, which track the Sun only while it is moving across the sky, arguably involve a kind of ‘online’ representation. Organisms that use only such online representation, theorists say, might still be cognitive. But offline processes and memory provide stronger evidence that organisms are not just responding reflexively to their immediate environment. This is particularly important for establishing claims about organisms that we are not intuitively inclined to think are cognitive – such as plants.

Is there evidence that plants do represent and store information about their environment for later use? During the day, the mallow uses motor tissue at the base of its stalks to turn its leaves towards the Sun, a process that’s actively controlled by changes in water pressure inside the plant (called turgor). The magnitude and direction of the sunlight is encoded in light-sensitive tissue, spread over the mallow’s geometric arrangement of leaf veins, and stored overnight. The plant also tracks information about the cycle of day and night via its internal circadian clocks, which are sensitive to environmental cues that signal dawn and dusk.

Overnight, using information from all these sources, the mallow can predict where and when the Sun will rise the next day. It might not have concepts such as ‘the Sun’ or ‘sunrise’, but it stores information about the light vector and day/night cycles that allows it to reorient its leaves before dawn so that their surfaces face the Sun as it climbs in the sky. This also allows it to re-learn a new location when plant physiologists mess with its ‘head’ by changing the direction of the light source. When the plants are shut in the dark, the anticipatory mechanism also works offline for a few days. Like other foraging strategies, this is about optimising available resources – in this case, sunlight.

Does this mechanism count as a ‘representation’ – standing in for parts of the world that are relevant to the plant’s behaviour? Yes, in my view. Just as neuroscientists try to uncover the mechanisms in nervous systems in order to understand the operation of memory in animals, plant research is beginning to unravel the memory substrates that allow plants to store and access information, and use that memory to guide behaviour.

Plants are a diverse and flexible group of organisms whose extraordinary capacities we are only just beginning to understand. Once we expand the vista of our curiosity beyond animal and even plant kingdoms – to look at fungi, bacteria, protozoa – we might be surprised to find that many of these organisms share many of the same basic behavioural strategies and principles as us, including the capacity for kinds of learning and memory.

To make effective progress, we need to pay careful attention to plant mechanisms. We need to be clear about when, how and why we are using metaphor. We need to be precise about our theoretical claims. And where the evidence points in a direction, even when it is away from common consensus, we need to boldly follow where it leads. These research programmes are still in their infancy, but they will no doubt continue to lead to new discoveries that challenge and expand human perspectives on plants, blurring some of the traditional boundaries that separated the plant and animal realms.

Of course, it’s a stretch of the imagination to try to think about what thinking might even mean for these organisms, lacking as they do the brain(mind)/body(motor) divide. However, by pushing ourselves, we might end up expanding the concepts – such as ‘memory’, ‘learning’ and ‘thought’ – that initially motivated our enquiry. Having done so, we see that in many cases, talk of plant learning and memory is not just metaphorical, but also matter-of-fact. Next time you stumble upon a kerbside mallow bobbing in the sunlight, take a moment to look at it with new eyes, and to appreciate the window this little weed provides into the extraordinary cognitive capacities of plants.

Laura Ruggles is a philosophy PhD candidate at the University of Adelaide in Australia.

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