#also your point abt him not having friends in the industry is a made up projection that is so obvs false lol

[joesalw]

hey, I saw your take on the break up and thought this was a safe place to say what I think might have happened. I wanted to know what you think. She adresses joe's struggle with mental ilness in many songs, right? but till the end of folkmore era, it was always in a supportive way. and then we got Renegade and you're losing me. I think she tried to support and understand him for years, but she eventually became tired and wanted more than he could offer. I think she might have wanted to get married to feel emotionally secured, but also because of the media pressure, like she also wanted to prove a point, and joe wasn't in a rush to cause of the struggles and the fact that that would forever tie him to a life he might not have idealized for himself, because of the massive fame. I hated how antonoff apparently dissed him in "everybody's an art bro lately talking shit abt your famous baby". like, if it was really bout joe, that was such a shitty thing to do. I can't imagine that the only person in her circle that'd sign the ceasefire petition is the villain. I got this impression that he's really a guy with a integrity that makes her feel small when she talks shit with her friends. I got the impression that she's very tied to fame and being the next biggest thing, the best in the industry, and her friends are all so much like that that a guy like joe could be completely misunderstood and accused of being pretentious. I think she tried to be like him because she admired it, but eventually felt rejected or not valued enough, and it grew a lot of resentment, which made her go back to the old ways, with all the friends that are so much more like her, as soon as she saw the new hype folkmore and midnights gave her. i think folklore was already a resigned TS, thinking the young promising years in pop were past her and wanting to improve in quality, before thinking she could still be "bejewleed". I think it came all at once to her, and I wouldn't doubt that the joe she described in you're losing me could be someone already seeing all that and not wanting to be there, but also not wanting to be the bad guy and break up with her, which is not nice, but I still can understand him much more tbh. I think I can see her wanting to change an be like him, only to not be able too and feel resentful, more than I can picture her trying to change him. What do you think?

What you wanted to say to justify her emotions is valid but it doesn’t give her the rights to publicly shame him and throw him under the bus either

I think that she's a horrible person because she knows that joe suffers from anxiety and mental health issues better than anyone and still went on to bring a hate trend upon him because he simply denied to marry her. She made her friends publicly unfollow him because she wanted to give her cult a green flag for bullying him. Also imagine making your partner's mental health all about you and writing songs for that, she really has a main character syndrome, she has to make everything about herself. I think Joe took the right decision by not marrying her. And after seeing how she dealt/is dealing with the whole situation, I'm sure he is letting out a sigh in relief.

[lasi-nariyoyoreads]

ask 1: there is so much going on w soobin txt can you do true personality reading on him?

ask 2: so seeing how the internet is flaming soobin's ass rn how does the industry ig or the general public feel abt him rn (im talking about the whole made in the abyss situation)

Squeezing these two asks together because they're about the same person. I'm not too entirely aware what this scandal is about, I thought it was related to that insta live drama but actually it's a new one about an anime. I'm 100% everyone will forget about this in a couple of days and those who remember will just be reminded that kpop stans' mental age is 2, nothing new here.

Nothing unexpected came from both readings either, his personality is pretty coherent with what he shows on camera, general public reaction is coherent with what I assume is happening on the internet.

Disclaimer:

My readings are made for fun and you should read them for fun too. So don't take them seriously.

His personality

Cards: 9 of pentacles, rev the star, queen or cups

He's an independent and successful person, someone you could admire.

He's hardworking, but also someone who knows how to enjoy his success. You might say there's a good work-life balance.

He isn't too needy when it comes to people, I guess he either sticks to his old friends or wait for others to approach him. He's very self-sufficient.

He might be moody, too pessimistic or too optimistic. He might fail to look objectively at his reality. He might think he's ok when he isn't or he might have a very negative view for no reason.

There might be phases where he feels like he's in a slump, where he lacks creativity and self-confidence.

But overall he's a caring, warm and generous person. He's sensitive and considerate of others. All good qualities that makes sense for someone who was chosen as a leader.

There's a very mature energy coming from these cards, also strong feminine energy, he's a supportive person overall who cares about the well-being of those around him.

Overall it's pretty coherent with what he shows on camera, he's not that interested in projecting a certain image or acting as something he isn't.

About the anime drama

Cards: rev 7 of wands, rev knight of cups, 5 of cups

Some think he's an incoherent person, as in "he seems so nice and calm, but actually he's completely different".

Rx 7 of wands usually indicates lowering your moral standards or giving them up.

I think it's pretty much what some people are criticizing him for.

Rx knight of cups again points to someone who is disloyal or with chaotic emotions.

There's this kind of betrayal energy in all these cards. I honestly don't know exactly what this manga is about, but kpop fans love to jump on the smallest thing and make it a massive case, it will definitely be forgotten in the next two weeks (unless someone else drags him in a new """"scandal"""") and I don't need tarot card to know it, just be a kpop fan for a bit and you'll get used to these patterns.

5 of cups is the card of sorrow, I think it generally indicates the common feeling of his fans, those angry at him are disappointed, those who side with him are sad that such a big drama exploded.

[kaibaspuppy]

!!

yaaay i finally got one of these ^_^ i may have written too much idk idk

(she doesnt have an image yet but if she did it would go here)

name: dr. minerva navarro, better known by her villain alias dr. arthopoda.

general information: minerva is a 64-year-old woman. she is caucasian, and she was born and raised in gotham city. she is a lesbian, and has autism. she comes from a jewish-catholic family, but is an athiest.

appearance: minerva is a pale woman with a thin face and frame. chin-length, curly grey hair that's hard to tame frames her face. her eyes are dark green, harsh and piercing with dark bags underneath them, and she seems to have a permanent thin-lipped scowl. she looks mature, but very tired. she usually wears a lab coat, turtlenecks, slacks, and dress shoes.

abilities: minervas abilities come purely from her suits. her most notable gadgets are insectoid wings and large metal spider legs (think like pak legs from invader zim but 8 of em,) which she uses interchangeably. she also has antennae that can pick up radio frequencies, and goggles that let her see heat signatures.

minerva is an entomologist, and was very well-regarded by her peers before her fall to villainy. currently she applies her knowledge in the field to creating suits and gadgets inspired by the biology of insects.

she is a rather serious, secluded person who, though brilliant, has a hard time making friends. she has a venomous wit, and is prone to wrathful outbursts when provoked. a lot of the time, it seems like her work is her life, to the point where she doesnt even try to deny it. shes very hardened and cynical. she hates vapid people.

she was in an unhappy marriage to david, an older man she grew to rather despise, and they had a child together - a daughter, whom they named eliza. she was a workaholic, and mever had time to be a mother. she left the both of them when eliza was 5, which she later realized was a mistake. she still regrets it today, if only because she wishes she had more time with her daughter. (she couldnt care less abt divorcing david lol sorry man)

decades later, after david died of cancer, minerva sought to reunite with the daughter she left behind in pursuit of science. eliza, now a fully grown woman, was harsh to her absentee mother at first, but they managed to become something of a normal family unit...

until tragedy struck. eliza worked for wayne industries, and was the victim of a horrible workplace accident that ended up being fatal. minerva only had two months with her daughter before the young womans untimely death, and it made something snap in her. she practically dropped off the face of the earth for a year or so, until she re-emerged as dr. arthopoda - a supervillain deadset on tearing down wayne industries.

her most notable ally is poison ivy. the two met in arkham, and formed a bond because of the similarities between their lines of study. minerva sees her as something of a daughter, and the two have worked together plenty of times. she is also friends with mr. freeze, as they have similar motivations and modus operandi.

otherwise, she has worked with lex luthor before due to their mutual distaste for bruce wayne. lex acted sympathetic towards her, and paid for minervas research and the construction of advanced suits for both of them. she turned on him when she realized he only wanted her technology, though.

tldr bug grandma who wants to wreck your shit

[lordendsavior]

meep. i like collabs, especially being a big fan of rap and r&b fan, so i would call that part more weird, than wild. it seems like he doesn't really exists inside the music industry, with the artists, sometimes. so, i don't know! if ed sheeran is one of your only close friends in the game (around his age) what's up with that... people mention being his fan, sure... but it doesn't seem like he's really close with anyone. like imagine an actor that isn't friends with other actors, it's a bit strange that's all. collaborations are a beautiful part of art and culture of all kinds.

oh yes forgive me, i forgot that most collabs we get these days in the pop world are a result of deep friendships and not at all a result of cold calculations and voice memos ppl send to the song producers 😭 i don’t want a collab for the sake of it. i want a collab if he’s gonna be feeling it with the other person

[chaeryybomb]

nct dream reaction to their idol!reader girlfriend being shipped with another idol

anon: nct dream reaction to their idol!reader girlfriend being shipped with some other idol :) love your works btw. and thank you for this in advance

pairing: nct dream x idol!reader

genre: headcanons, fluff, crack

warnings: mentions of insecurities

a/n: dhsjdj technically my requests are closed rn but I decided I would write this out so I hope you enjoy this!

mark lee

confused boi™

tbh he wouldn't even notice you were being shipped with another idol until another member points it out

you were a special guest mc for the show and fans saw the cute interactions you had with the boyz juyeon

and soon enough fans started shipping the both of you together

in reality, you and juyeon were just high school friends and you were glad to see him again

fans on the other hand,,

mark didn't realise you were being shipped with juyeon until doyoung pointed it one day

and mark was all like

( ・◇・)？"nani? y/n and juyeon???"

he would then search up ynjuyeon on twitter because cough yeah

and found a shit ton of edits of the both of y'all

and now he's sad :((

he's sad that because no one shipped y'all together

"isn't your relationship a secret???"

"yeah but still :((("

mark sweetie y'all have neve interacted on stage before fjdjdndnd

he knows you love him and would never cheat on him

but boy is he going to be a pouty baby when y'all hang out next time

literally all he's going to say is:

"why do they ship you and him together?? why not me :(("

"mark they've never seen us in the same room before"

huang renjun

unbothered king™

at least that's what he tells you fhdjdj

he found out through a vlive fhdhdjj

it was one of the usernames and the username was like ynxyanan_shipper

and renjun mf squinted his eyes like

did I read that clearly ಠ_ಠ

he's like yn and wHO

chenle was beside him when it happened and chenle was like what's wrong

and renjun points out the username

and chenle starts lauGHING BECAUSE HE FINDS IT SO FUNNY

renjun smacks him on the head to tell him to shut up DHHSHDD

obviously he would take a screenshot of the username and sends it to you

and he's like

short king <3: do you hv something to confess to me

you: ,,, my love for you??

short king <3: blocked

you: HAHSAHS IM KIDDING

tbh you find the situation honestly really funny

cause you and yanan aren't exactly friends? you're more of acquaintances than friends

and you made eye contact one (1) time with him by accident at an award show and suddenly you're being shipped with him

when you call him the next time to hang out, definitely expect him to be salty about it fjdjfjd

"hey are you free to come over today?"

"I don't know, why don't you ask your BOYFRIEND yanan"

"renjun istg i will break up with you-"

lee jeno

oh baby boy is gonna be so so confused

he's going to be even more confused because you're being shipped with itzy's chaeryeong fhfhfjf

see you and chaeryeong were featured in an episode of a reality tv show once

and the both of y'all immediately hit it off and your friendship was just adorable

so y'all kept interacting every time y'all see each other

and y'all are now nicknamed as the 4th gen gfs because y'all are so adorable???

like the chaeryn ship ur most popular ship ever

so jeno is so confused?? like why is his gf being shipped with her??

he's like a whole ass puppy okay

you, on the other hand, find the chaeryn ship really cute so you don't mind it and you jokingly call chaeryeong your gf once or twice on live before fjdjfn

whenever you tell him that you're hanging out with chaeryeong, he will pout at you and give you his best puppy eyes

like he will cling onto you and try to convince you to now to go

it works like 13% of the time and you would cancel plans with chaer but most of time it doesn't and you would end up being late jhdjsh

but it will slowly become into an inside joke between y'all

like yk that one meme

"this is yn my girlfriend and her girlfriend chaeryeong"

kjdhkjshfs yeah that

but in all seriousness, jeno is really unbothered about you being shipped with chaeryeong because it basically has the same energy as him being shipped with jaemin

whenever y'all are having play fights, you jokingly threaten to leave him for chaeryeong jdsfjds and he immediately stops and says that's unfair

pls shower him in hugs and kisses later

lee haechan

definitely makes a fuss about it

i mean he knows that you aren't going to leave him and all but is he going to be dramatic about it? yes, yes he is

he finds out by himself because he was probably on twitter stalking your hashtag

when he suddenly stumbles upon and edit of you and ateez's san

he's like O.O wot is tHis?

screenshots the edit and sends it to you

hyuckie: yNNNN

hyuckie: THE LOVE OF MY LIFE

hyuckie: BABY

hyuckie: SUGAR BUM

hyuckie: DAISY PIE

you: what in, the ever loving fuck, is daisy pie

hyuckie: *sends screenshot* ARE U CHEATING ON ME

you: hyuck that pic is clearly edited

hyuckie: I KNOW BUT ARE YOU????

you: i-

he makes so much jokes about it that you literally have to shut him up with a kiss

jokes on u reader he's doing this on purpose to get those free kisses

the jokes stop when you actually finally meet san during a game show and shippers are like omg they finally interacted

and the amount of ynxsan edits just,, grow

haechan acts even salty about it and whines about why fan don't ship y'all together when y'all have made eye contact during the golden disk awards bc he was being a lil shit hdsjhfjds

"hey what if i keep staring at you during the melon so we can get into a scandal?"

"hyuck this is supposed to be a secret relationship-"

"yeah but-"

jokes on u he actually does stare at you at the next award show and thankfully did not get into any scandals, but fans started to ship the both of you!

na jaemin

the true unbothered king

literally does not care that you are shipped with someone else

because he knows that he is yours and vice versa

and plus you love him a lot so

he finds out from chenle, who did it out of spite because one day chenle was bored and wanted to cause some chaos

boi basically ran up to jaemin to shove an edit of you and treasurer's junkyu together and went like

"look hyung! ur gf is being shipped with someone eLsE"

"oh that's weird"

"rigHT"

"I thought people shipped her with treasurer's hyunsuk"

chenle is like

HUH???

"aren't you like,, jeaolous??"

jaemin just shrugs and says "hmm, not really"

jaemin knows that you are good friends wth a lot of idols because you're a social butterfly

so he truly doesn't mind when you get shipped with other idols bc in the end , he's the one holding you in his arms

plus he knows the edits and shippers are mostly harmless

and he trusts you

so he just fucks around with chenle jkldsfj

chenle is still confused bc he wants to rile jaemin up for fun but failed hjdshf

zhong chenle

if you thought haechan was dramatic, then you better buckle up for chenle's

so you see

fans already shipped u and chenle

like

y'all already have a dating scandal

and both companies tried so hard to defuse it

see you are an mc for a music show and you were interviewing nct dream

chenle, being the lil shit he is, kept giving you the heart eyes the entire time

and 6 months later, y'all got caught by dispatch on a daTe

ofc both sides were panicking but chenle was enjoying bc he's like "yeah this is my s/o and what abt it"

but y'all still had a dating ban so sm was this close in kicking him hfdsjfh

fortunately, they were able to cover it up as someone else so there's that

so chenle is aware that fans shipped the both of you together

so when he sees you being shipped with stray kid's jeongin

he was like "HOW DARE THEY-"

calls you to complain about the ship for 3 hours

and that is how you found out as well-

literally you don't even know jeongin so you just let chenle complain about it

he goes on and on about why fans should continue to ship y'all together so when he reveals the relationship the fans will be surprised but also not really at the same time-

"should i get into another scandal with you?"

"chenle no-"

park jisung

oh baby boy is going to be very, very confused

i mean he knows that shipping is a thing between fans

he's just confused why ppl would ship you and p1harmony's keeho

like you have never interacted with him so why would fans ship the both of y'all??

the dreamies mostly tell him to not take it serious but the chenle and haechan would egg him on

"get into a dating scandal with them"

"guys no-"

he wouldn't tell you that it bothers him because he doesn't want you laughing at him, worrying over a small issue

so honestly, it lowkey eats him up on the inside

until one day, you basically force it out of him because he's been acting weird for the past week

he finally confesses about the what's bothering him

and you tell him that you wouldn't have laughed at him

you know shipping idols is a common thing in the industry and sometimes it's uncomfortable knowing it when you're already in a relationship

but you also tell him that it's basically harmless because fans can't really force the both of y'all together

jisung would be insecure about the relationship because it's kinda of his first? so he just doesn't want to mess it up

just reassure him a lot and tell him that you won't leave him

and as time goes by, he just gets used to the shipping

[istherewifiinhell]

reading process: chapter 196 (damn)

reading highlights: now with new and improved features

178 Yjh hesitating to fast ball special this weird little dude: pls dont die. kdj: look at me. bitch

179 Gah. can an author make a story so big even their monster cant eat it

180 I knew the 4th wall was gonna eat but i forgot IT HAS TEETH

shaking the no no can at 4th wall

gah okay yeah jesus lee sookyung [song accompaniment love run by the amazing devil]

the narrative will make you apart of it (threat)

181 '4th wall also isolated me from myself' DING DING DING

overall evaluation ⬛⬛... -> mood

gonna twach the sentient dangerous trauma response some... morals? interpersonal skills?

↳cant handle direct interaction, eats and sleeps. yea

↳im gonna take a nap right here

LJH: arent you and kdj.... yjh grimacing as being ask about his love life by his teenage ward

kdj funeral -> song accompaniment welly boots by the amazing devil (just because I left doesnt mean I'm not still there)

YJH sponsor -> praying for his fate eh?

182 [sponsors lhs 100 head pats]

SYS is literally your daughter 🥺. kdj dad who hates dads moment

183 lhs wants to be on kdj team :((((

I WOULD LIKE TO SEE LHS IN THE DRESS

(did hades make it??)

184 feeling differently after talking to 4th wall yeah pretty sure you had a break thru about dissociating there

yjh: looking with eyes not seen in TWOS -> kdj facial expression blindness trutherism

185 YJH: cause you know me sooo well kdj: starting to think i dont know this you that well

yjh thoughts: there have never been so many ppl who made it to here

"continue to live kim dokja now you have to save this world"

kdj u cant take your own medicine (yjh scheming)

LSK contemplating abt what shit is up with her son

Something lives IN THE WALL

186 other people feel pain with no wall. YES!

"I told him there is no such development [yjh death] in the ending i want"

'yjh desperate face' thats crushing to even read

187 hsy type cast as murder friend sorry bestie

god some classic kdj asshole moments -> guilting lhs and everything

"see the sight of a bearish man weeping" i would like to

jhw T.T oh my murder woman

188 making sys and lgy do this. your KIDS! -> generational Something or other

kdj to yjh: you cant change whats already happened -> this may be an unauthorized use of radical acceptance

your stigma is Literally self sacrifice based... DUDE

get killed by the narrative. your loved ones but also the story... for the story. AH

yjh im so sorry... this is devasting

Uriel... lol shes sweet ig

Demon king of salvation. so juicy (unionize hell lol)

189 LHS LGY YJH boy grief party

yjh widower era

min jiwon and han donghoon! yay

yoohan bonding?

190 Bihyung aw!

[I will pull all of you down from that fucking heaven]

191 a soul can't belong to anyone!

"I will destroy the world of the fucking dokkaebis"

192 ur still a jerk kdj. drama kid

193 yeah fuck the state jhw

do they all share a house 🥺

LHS is back with the army... okay putting a pin in that

yjh stayed in his room like a broken person... bruh

jhw was a bartender? did i know that? it makes so much sense tho

kdj ur story is told bc they love you!!

194 idk i was the only person reading this 1000 chapter work and when i left a comment some stuff changed

syswitz industrial complex... run that by me one more time

damn human life is just like hell, ive been saying this

195 demon trains? i know all about those

complete ur scheme. say somthing cool. pass out. kdj ur self parody at this point

rotation: recency bias is a hell of a thing. i want to partially tie up the parenting stuff with noting how often the constellation incarnation relationship was considered parental, how kdj views them (and indeed how weve seen quite a few be) really cruel, or exploitative, and well thats fitting for him to see that as parental isnt it. but then also. he has kids in his own care, and one is literally his incarnation. frankly im interested in both how attacking and dethroning gods is gonna impact his own godhood deal, his own parenting, and his view of his mothers job of parenting him

im not sure if i have any particular takes here but let it be know kdj is a bastard and a scoundrel and i shall not miss him. not from this distance. no but god that was a classic really jerk move level manipulation. need to re-calibrate the dials. whats worse is at this point i think he can fully understand how much emotional damage hes putting his loved ones through.

Also did you know we live in a society. this one is pretty nascent so far but the breaking of the Seoul dome is reminding us of normal human society, and its flaws, and with the demonic realm, blatantly stated, we live in hell on earth.

[1eos]

What's your theory on why black ppl (predominantly black girls) continue to stan kpop groups ? I remember i had a phase that correlated with my lowest points lol but I cannot understand continuing to listen to and promote groups that are constantly anti black? How does it not get ruined after that ? You reminded me of them got7 twins and them youtube twins and it genuinely made me so sad . I wonder why so many ppl accept behaviour from Asian musicians that they never would for other non blacks

i lowkey hate it when y’all ask questions like this bc 1. what genre of music doesnt hate black women specifically?  2. why is everyone acting like kpop fans are the only ppl defending racism? why is kpop this big bad everyone keeps centering the discussion on? nd 3. why is it that black ppl aren’t ever allowed to have fun--even if its flawed nd why are we always supposed to be focusing on the burden of racism 24/7?

to expound: 

first of all imma say it again: there is no industry in the world that doesn’t demean black women nd use them as a prop. 

american pop is full of blackfishers but would u ask a black ariana stan why she’s still loving her? the rnb scene is full of so much misogynoir its ridiculous nd its not just the men go check summer walker’s tw for proof of that. modern american music was BUILT on shitting on black women like u can find so many stories abt motown stealing songs from folks nd not paying them royalties but are u asking black folks why they aren’t denouncing ALL of music?

secondly the way kpop fans defend racism isn't even new. chr*s brown got bitches defending him. there are folks out there right now blaming megan for getting shot by t*ry lanez. dr*ke used to get accused of being a predator every couple of months nd ppl (black women included) STILL was stanning him 😭😭😭😭😭 

these are patterns of behavior that is deeper than just koreacoons it’s engrained into the very fiber of society. the first pattern is that black women should protect men nd defend them at any cost. AND the behavior of parasocial relationships nd protecting celebrities bc we feel that when THEY’RE attacked WE’RE being attacked

kpop fans are just doing the same thing in a different ocean with a group of mostly men that aren’t black. i won’t deny that the fact that these kpop boys aren’t black can play into the equation on a deeper level bc there is a subset of fans that may have been othered by their black peers for having different hobbies nd subsequently turn to alternate hobbies. 

like when i was in high school the alt black girls were into white rock bands. nd just like then ppl now try to other themselves from blackness by using kpop but still its nothing new just a new model race of nonblacks to fawn over. which is mega creepy nd should be called out but fetishists be the most popular folks on social media. 

nd my last point is.......kpop is fun nd provides an abundance of content with comebacks weekly nd constant fanwars nd arguments and drama. kpop is also trendy nd promotes u to be connected to these groups for the long term. like are black ppl supposed to be magically immune to the appeal of kpop? just bc of racism that they’ll experience somewhere else? 

nonblacks get to enjoyed flawed media but we can’t? do u know how many white gays r on here saying twilight is gay culture nd no one coming for them or asking them why they're reading that when the book straight up spread negative misinformation abt a real life native tribe nd promotes very strange nd unhealthy relationship tropes? 

why is the conversation ALWAYS centered on how black ppl can lower themselves to enjoy a certain kind of media when nonblacks can mindlessly consume nd defend racism nd no one is asking them why they’re giffing cultural appropriation or ignoring the voices of their black ‘friends’ nd still spamming mamamoo gifs on the dash? ofc black ppl need to have self love but a lot pressure is put on us to engage in this mythical media purity nd no one else which i have a problem with. like we do deserve to fucking have fun

tl; dr: all industries are racist nd no matter who u ‘stan’ u will encounter racism. black ppl are defending misogynists nd racists even outside of kpop. black kpop fans see kpop as an alt hobby nd this can be in a normal way or a fetishy way. nd a lot of black ppl just want to have fun nd jump into the endless content of kpop and its unfair that only black ppl get questioned endlessly on what they like

[nanasarea]

Na Jaemin as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jaemin x idol!reader

Prompt: na jaemin being the best bf 

Request: Hey! I love your idol!nct series it’s so cute! I was wondering if you can if you could write one for jaemin? the dreamies are really killing it right now

Word count: 1180 (i might have gotten carried away haha)

a/n: next idol bf is chenle so watch out for that in the next few days also me and proofreading still haven’t met.

Haechan /  Yuta / Mark / Jeno /  Chenle / Renjun / Jisung / Jaehyun

you were childhood friends with Haechan

so when both of you got into the kpop industry

neither of you were surprised

he did debut before you 

and he kept teasing you for it

insisted you call him your senior 

so because you two were friends, 

you spent a lot of time together

even in your trainee days,

you would have practice and then go to get boba after

sometimes that meant more than just you and hyuck

sometimes that meant his attractive friends would join

who you may or may not have a crush on

but that’s not the point right now

jaemin is naturally flirty

may i remind you that he doesn’t even know if he’s flirting?

like he did with the nurse back in his predebut days?

yeah, that

he does that with you

and you try not to blush 

but who are you kiddin

you’re cheeks are as hot as the sun 

hyuck, being one of your best friends, catches on 

and he insists on bringing jaemin everywhere

and i mean everywhere

you plan on going to an internet cafe?

jaemin is there

you get a call from haechan to play a game?

jaemin is there

you go for after-practice ice cream?

shocker!

jaemin is there

he’s a smart boy 

he realizes why you’re so flustered around him

so it’s not long until he makes a move

you end up going on a date 

walking beside han river

eating ice cream

and getting to know each other 

you knew a lot before

but not it was a different way of getting to know each other

because you and hyuck have been friends before debut, 

people knew that seeing you together meant nothing

just two bros chilling 

so when they saw you and jaemin, 

they thought nothing of it

they’ve seen you, hyuck, jaemin and other members hang out loads

so they figured you were hanging out without them this time

which was perfect for jaemin

he did not like the idea of being secretive 

he loves his fans, 

he doesn’t want to hide things from them

and sneaking around was just way too much work

sure, you couldn’t kiss in public yet

which made him whine A LOT

but it was better than nothing

once you got serious

the agency/agencies decided to confirm it

was anyone actually shocked?

no

does that mean everyone was supportive?

no

but he didn’t care,

he knew real fans wouldn’t be mad at him

they’d be happy for him

(yes this is me being salty abt ppl unstaning and being mean to jaemin bc of the dating rumors, which ended up being fake anyway)

so let’s say your album just came out recently

he goes to the store

and buys 48 albums himself

does he need them?

YES HE NEEDS ALL THE Y/N CONTENT POSSIBLE

sure, jisung gets lowkey mad that now he has less space in the room for his stuff

but jaemin doesn’t care

he needs to support his baby ???

VARIETY SHOWS

he did not care about the cameras

he want to hug you?

he hugs you

he wants to hold your hand?

he will hold your hand

and if he wasn’t allowed for some reason?

he’d hold your hands behind your backs

same for award shows

whenever your seats are close, 

he’s not with his members

he’s with you

loves when your schedules overlap

you’re both at music core?

you bet he’s glued onto you

whenever he can

3 seconds after getting his hair done, 

he runs to you

“jaemin, if i’m gonna have to redo that, i will slap you” - stylist

like he cares tho

if he wants to hug his baby, he’s hugging his baby

photographer na 

his ig is filled with the best photos of you

and your ig?

half of the posts have 

📷 by Photographer Na

because he wants his credit

if not, he nags

have i mentioned he will sulk to you about jisung not accepting his affection?

rants for 3 hours 

“-what does that even mean? I basically raised him, I should be his favorite hyung, not chenle! he doesn’t even call chenle hyung! I’m his hyung, the one who cooks for him, cleans up after him, do-”

after that, you need to cuddle him for an additional 3 hours

other than jisung being “an ungrateful brat” (jm’s words)

he doesn’t really complain about much

he does however listen to your complaining 

with the biggest smile on his face

is literally so comforting

you know how people have their own love languages?

he uses all of them for you

words of affirmation? 

he will literally compliment you for breathing

gifts?

unexpected gifts, 

sometimes he buys you a necklace you wanted

sometimes he makes you a cute origami love note

acts of service?

cooks for you whenever

you say you’re hungry and he’s already cooking a 5 course meal

quality time?

takes you to walk along the han river

and just talk

he likes it because it reminds him of your first date

and physical touch?

do i even need to explain?

you end up going on a variety show 

where you interact with kids

and jaemin is just like O.o

he’s the mom friend

so when he sees that

he knows he wants a baby

not now of course

but he’s already planning the names

let’s just say that

speaking of babies

jeno and jaemin  parent duo?

nah now it’s y/n and jaemin parent duo

sorry jeno, he still loves you but like y/n

and you best bet you lose your mind in the middle of it all

jisung and renjun are screaming because of aliens

jeno is screaming out of frustration of being assigned with washing dishes again

haechan is screaming because he isn’t getting attention

then jeno and haechan are screaming because one of them is a sore loser and the other is a confident winner

chenle is just screaming

jaemin is internally screaming

and so are you

you end up leaving them to continue doing....

that 

while you two try and calm down in another room

interpret that as you will 

c o l l a b 

s t a g e

the stage presence is boom

*lucas voice*

y/n boom

jaemin boom

together

BOOM

we got that boom boom boom boom 

you end up being korea’s it couple

i said what i said

convinces you to start acting

so you can star in a drama together

each other’s love interest tho

nothing else is acceptable

because even tho he knows it’s just acting

your lips are just for him

and it shall stay that way

mkay

he doesn’t get jealous that easily when he sees you interact with other idols

but let’s just say this

you touched someone’s arm when you were an mc

and he went feral

“my precious y/n, your hands belong on my body, and my body only, no one else, got that?”

you didn’t know if you should be turned on

or laugh

maybe both?

to sum it up: jaemin best boy(friend)

Someone call an ambulance, my heart isn’t my heart anymore, it’s jaemin’s part-time apartment, why part-time? because when he isn’t living in my heart, he’s living in my brain.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

[musette22]

hey, it's the anon that sent in the thing abt rpf being iffy. i understand your points, and i don't have a huge problem with it if it stays in fandom spaces. i think my issue just comes from my own stance that celebrities deserve to not have their private lives speculated or written abt, even if it is just a fantasy. but i don't think you're necessarily being immoral or wrong, and i know that the speculating and writing abt celebrities is so widespread now that it probably won't stop. i sometimes just feel bad for the people that might feel violated by it. and, for the record, i also rlly don't like the "self-shipping" with celebrities either, as it seems pretty invasive. also, someone replied to my ask that you answered saying that i probably just don't like that you ship two men rather than a man and a woman, and that is absolutely not true, i'm a lesbian lmao. anyways, i just thought it was worth it to clear a couple things up. i hope you have a good day!! <3

Hi, thanks for sending another messages and clarifying a few things, I appreciate it! I also appreciate your stance about the private lives of celebrities and I do understand where you're coming from. Just for the record; you explained your issue well in your first ask and there was nothing that made me think you had a problem with same sex shipping!

The way I see it, most celebrities more or less willingly renounce some of their privacy just by becoming a celebrity - I'd even say that's inherent in the concept of celebrity/fame. Off the top of my head, I can't think of anyone, at least not in the entertainment industry, who is famed merely for their art or profession, and has never talked about their personal life or thoughts publicly (whether in interviews, at fan meetings, in their songs, etc.). If you're famous, people will know certain things about you, unless you try really hard to keep your private life completely private, but even then idk if that could ever be achieved. Of course, no one is entitled to know anything about celebrities - it all depends on what and how much they want to share with the public. And if they want to share some things and keep other things private, that's their prerogative and we should respect their boundaries in that regard. I would never demand (or even ask) information about a celebrity's family, relationship status or sexual preferences, for instance, if they didn't volunteer that information themselves.

But I can't imagine celebrity culture without a certain amount of fascination with and/or lusting after said celebrities, whether by their fans or the general public. I don't think it's possible to separate the two completely. So I don't think it's wrong or weird to privately think/speculate about their private lives, as long as you observe certain hard boundaries, which I've explained in reply to your previous ask.

If I'm not mistaken, the self-shipping you mention sounds like reader insert fic? If so, I wasn't even necessarily talking about that tbh, I just meant like, when you're on a train and you start daydreaming about meeting your favourite celebrity and what they'd say to you and how they'd fall in love with you and how they might kiss you etc. etc. That's something I think a lot of people (not everyone, but a lot, especially people who are 'fans', with more than a casual interest in a celebrity) have done at some point in their lives. And I don't really see how that's different from putting it down on paper, as long as you make sure the celebs never get to see it, just as they'll never see the thoughts in your head.

Basically, what happens in both cases is we put words in their mouths and make them do things in our imagination - in a way, they're almost just as much characters as fictional characters are, because at the end of the day, we don't truly know these people, and we certainly can't control them. I don't know if you saw what someone else in the notes of the other ask said as well, about Sir Ian McKellan? @misspluckyplum said that "Ian McKellen was asked on his website what he thought about 'real person slash'. He remarked, and I'm paraphrasing here, that those who were writing RPS didn't know the real him, therefore weren't depicting the real him, so how could he begrudge creative expression that had nothing to do with him anyways?"

That's how I personally see it as well. I met Sebastian once, and it was acutely clear to me that he was a stranger. Sure, I know a lot about him, but that's not the same as knowing him personally. The things I know about him are what I use to write my stories, but what I inevitably end up with is a character of my own making with lots of personal projection, sprinkled with some real life facts and mannerisms of actual people bearing the same name as my characters. I do see how that could entail a risk of objectification/sexualization, but I personally fantasize just as much if not more about these guys shyly confessing their feelings, holding hands, and raising babies together as I do about them having sex. For me, it's really much more about creative expression, and an outlet for personal romantic feelings, thoughts and desires, than it is about me wanting to completely know or - god forbid - control Chris or Sebastian or have a say in their lives.

I know you also mentioned that you would be weirded out if you knew people were shipping you with a friend of yours, and I understand what you mean. Some people will think it's extremely strange and invasive and it would be especially strange and invasive if you're a non-famous person. But like I said, by far the majority of celebrities will be aware that they've signed off some of their privacy in becoming famous. A few of them clearly hate that (which I think should be respected as much as possible) and some may be more protective over their personal lives than others, but generally speaking, I think if you habitually agree to do photoshoots, interviews and public performances or events, you're used to, and to certain extent even okay with, people being fascinated by you and wanting you/wanting you do do things.

Moreover, I've also heard about quite a few celebs who have endorsed or encouraged RPF shipping because they think it's fun or flattering, so in the end I think it depends on the person whether they'd consider RPF shipping invasive or not. I personally would not mind at all if I were famous and people would write stories about me and my best friend falling in love if that brought them comfort or happiness for some reason, as long as I didn't have to read the stories and people would not harass either of us about it. But again, that's a personal stance, and of course we can't know who is or isn't okay with it, unless they tell us. If they do know and they hate it, and they tell their fans to stop, I would of course respect their wishes in a heartbeat. But until then, I think it's okay to operate on the assumption that "what they don't know can't hurt them", especially if it's coming from a place of love and respect.

Sorry this got so long, it's just something I have a lot of thoughts and feeling about! I hope you have a lovely day as well! <3

[darkangelhome]

hi ! hope you're doing well. i dont know if this is me asking or just running my thoughts out bc i dont have anyone to talk to abt this and i came across your blog so imma go straight to the point. i am on my taekook phase yet again lol. seeing how the other ship (jm & jk) is being flagged by bighit lately is so weird to me im sorry i do not hate their moments together but sometimes when i see them on official contents i cant help but wonder, if tae and jk are indeed a couple, dont you get weirded out how jm is sometimes say, crossing the line or gets too much? i get he's playful and a natural flirt but if he knows that his two besties are a thing, wouldn't it be right to set boundaries? like he's clingy to jk and i know he is with tae too but not much. the maknae line are very close to each other that i know very well but really just wanna ask you do you sometimes get the same feels too? pls be honest. like if i were tae id be awkward at times. i bet no matter how close they are they still get a tad bit jelly. thats fair to say right? how do i explain this......when it comes to vmin theres no room for controversies because they made it clear that they are each other's bestie soulmate. and i love love them but jikook....it seems to me like jm is a bit you know i dont want to describe it as going far sometimes but i cant think of how to put it into other words so yea..... im not gonna elaborate further bc as a taekooker yourself i think you see things i see. and you know what im talking about. makes me wonder does tk just go with whatever jm does bc they dont want to make him feel left out? since clearly the hyung line arent that touchy touchy or go along with his flirty plays like the maknae line do. (given his personality) i dont know sometimes i cant wrap my head around it. It's crazy to me how tk both just shove things off when it comes to jm... i guess they both just value him so much but still lol :D bc personally i dont think id be very comfy with my bestfriend acting all that flirty with my man........ dang they have such a strong friendship and trust letting each other pretty much just do whatever ! my belief on tk is firm i just wonder how tae feels sometimes knowing their company is trying to push this narrative with his bf haha i know it isnt right but cant help but wish they come out alr to stop this madness 😭 cuz if this further stems up im only afraid of one thing..... what are these jm and jk romantic shippers going to do then 😭

Maybe you missed it, but I don't answer questions about other ships. Also, I think I've answered a few questions about this before. Check out my "ask me anything" tag.

Jimin is the same with other members as he is with Jungkook except in one way: Jimin's affections towards JK often take on a paternal tone that I just don't see in his affections with others (sometimes he'll have this tone towards Tae but not as often as towards JK; and never towards the hyungs). Right down to ruffling/patting the hair at the top of JK's head like you do with a little brother or younger pal. And that tone fits Jimin's own words about feeling like JKs dad or feeling like JK is his real little brother, but people continue to ignore both his words and the actual tone of his actions towards JK. I get why people ship them because they're so sweet and clearly have a special bond, but they're one of the duos out of all the members that have always struck me as being the most like true brothers who are dear friends (Jin and Jungkook are the other, though they have their own dynamic).

Jimin is the person who takes his job the most seriously in the group and does almost 80% of the fanservice alone. I highly doubt that any of the boys are uncomfortable with shipping knowing that fanservice is apart of the job that they signed up for when they decided to become idols. Most of the concert moments are fanservice. They even reheasing. Let's not discuss this. Borderline homoerotic or flirty photoshoots are fanservice. Anything that is being done with the audience's enjoyment in mind first is fanservice. And it's okay to acknowledge that. It doesn't make any of the relationships within BTS any less genuine just because they also engage in things that are acted out or staged. The reason why they are so good and so loved is that although they do the same things other kpop groups do, they are natural. They know how big shipping culture is within the k-pop industry and I'm sure they're aware that that's exactly why fanservice as a concept exists. That's why it's rare for them to get jealous of each other while doing their jobs. In fact, Tae rarely gets jealous of Jungkook from the other members, it's usually with Jungkook jealous of him. Jungkook has a stronger sense of owning what belongs to him. That's why he's not as good at hiding his reactions and facial expression as Tae lol

[fencesandfrogs]

sea shanties, work songs, tiktok

so apparently tiktok and sea shanties (technically they’re usually sea folk songs, based on the ones i’ve heard, which is not many) are having a moment and as someone who’s always been a fan of work songs, esp. sea shanties, i just wanted to take a moment to talk/think about them.

[this is abt 1.4k words with a lot of music, incl. 4 embeded videos. i included this break because scrolling past long posts is annoying but like. there’s some good music to listen to in here even if u don’t want to read the whole thing.]

call & response is a pretty common musical idea. i’m not sure at all, but i’d wager a good deal that it’s probably some of the oldest stuff we have. but, like, if you’ve ever sung anything in a group, it’s there. the classic call and response is shorter, but i just want to also say a lot of music can be thought of as call and response, like verses/choruses, etc.

i think it just speaks to a human desire to participate in music. many people know what i’m talking about here (maybe most? i come from a musical family so i don’t have a good breadth of experience but i’ve met very few people who don’t jive to music), and so we make this little welcoming come sing with me environment.

anyway, so work songs are a type of music meant to coordinate labor. a lot of work songs are formed by slaves, because for a work song to be helpful, you need to be doing work that requires coordination.

sea shanties are a specific type of work song that use the general structure of the american slave work song combine with irish, scottish, and english folk music.

folk music as a whole is a wider genre that overlaps a lot with work songs, especially as you start to turn to industrial work songs and cowboy work songs and the like which have a less specific rhythm than sea shanties specifically.

musical edification complete, i’m going to focus on sea shanties and industrial work songs b/c that’s what i listen to the most.

so call and response. sea shanties usually have a soloist part that’s a bit more musically complex, and the response is “simpler”. i’m not here to talk abt music theory or why they developed like that, but you know when you’re bad at singing, having a simple part to join in with is positive. hits the warm gooey spot of participating in group music. here’s a recording of blow the man down which i think demonstrates this quality really well:

(it’s a pretty popular shanty which is why i picked it. the “truth”of my argument is not at all universal, and it’s not just about speed, but also the rhythm, melody, etc.)

anyway there’s a lot of shanties and what typically comes to mind is drunken sailor which i know “all” the words to (as much as anyone can) but you’ll see theré’s no call and response

what do you do with a drunken sailor

what do you do with a drunken sailor

what do you do with a drunken sailor

early in the morning

right? that’s not a call and response, it’s just repetition. lyrically, its a call and response:

put him in bed with the captain’s daughter

(that’s my favorite line bc as kids we didn’t understand it so it made us laugh)

but musically you’re not having a back and forth. and so they’re things everyone just gets to sing together.

and that brings me to more industrial work songs. my favorite is sixteen tons, because i’m a basic bitch, and the line “saint peter don’t you call me cause i can’t go” is eternally stuck in my head. here’s a full version:

so as you can see, there’s no call and response, but the melody is relatively simple. it’s repetitive, the range is decent, and it’s got a really flexible tempo (the video i chose is pretty moderate, but here’s a fast one (and this is pure performance), and i swear i have a slower version on my computer but i can’t find it for the life of me).

(aside: one thing to notice in the johnny cash version is the backing. his is far more complex than ernie ford, and that’s because it’s dropped all pretense of being a work song. work songs don’t have much behind them because they’re almost always a capello. this isn’t super relevant to the discussion i just wanted to point it out.)

so mining work songs are generally like this (see black waters, another favorite of mine), and it’s not hard to see where folk music as a genre develops:

i just really like this song it’s probably not the best example.

on the other hand, other folk music maintains the structure. lets look at oh susanna (i hate this version, but the vocals are very clear so uhhh here’s a random cool fancy one listen to this it’s super cool).

the whole thing is fairly repetitive, it doesn’t have a strictly definite end, etc. the melody is still pretty simple, although i will say, having sung this in a choir, it can get more complicated in arrangement pretty easily.

anyway, this becomes bluegrass which is basically the folk version of country, here’s callin baton rogue which is absolutely one of the best songs to ever be written. this version is done by garth brooks, country singer, but listen to that fiddle and tell me it’s country.

(this is future matthew with an edit just to say, like, i’m not trying to establish a *strictly* factual chain of music genres here. bluegrass is, i believe, related closely to jazz & blues, while country was formed directly as an opposition to jazz & music history is really complicated.)

you get a lot of ballads here, eg ballad of john henry. i’m not going to say that’s good. but uh there’s a lot to filter through and i’m supposed to be working on my computer science assignment not doing an exploratory discussion of work songs and associated genres.

so this brings us to scottish/irish/english ballads. the clancy brothers are a popular band here, my mom had them on in the car a lot. here’s the work of the weavers for a slower song, but a good one, and here’s moonshiner, which is both a good song and takes me to my next point: sea songs, folk song, and tiktok (see its almost the same as the title it’s a joke).

i’m happy to see folk music making a resurgence. it was really a shame that we spent such a long time listening to not singing friendly music. that’s not a diss on any particular genre (except for edm fuck edm, everyone who makes dance remixes should have their music liscences revoked), because in isolation every genre is fine, but then you take it all together, and there’s a lack of the group singing, safe for bad singers, simple to play, music as a wider genre.

when did we stop singing lullabies? i mean i assume we still sing them to children, but how many do you know? how long has it been since a song like you are my sunshine has been popular? *caveat that i don’t listen to the radio, but if you have a counter example, make sure you think about how long it is and how large the range is and how complicated the rhythm is, etc., because that all is part of it.

at the camp i used to go to, we would sing bohemian rhapsody walking down the hill to the waterfront. someone would start it, and those interested get to join in sometime around “easy come easy go", but then you get to a guitar solo, and the thing kind of fizzles without a backing track.

and that’s what i mean, i mean people keep singing together, and wouldn’t it be better if more people made music that was meant to be sung? i mean sure you can gather your friends and sing anything, but will it resonate in the same way “what do you do with a drunken sailor?” would? will everyone be able to sing it, will it sound okay if you sing it badly? why did we stop making music that sounded best when we sing it the way we always have? why did we stop listening to it?

anyway i don’t have a deep take on this except like folk music is really good, and traditional songs exist for a reason. since i’ve focused really heavily on america and gaelic tradition, because that’s what i listend to growing up, and therefore can speak about in a qualitative sense, i would like to just leave this south african lullaby here, because my mom used to sing it to me, so it’s got a real soft spot in my heart. i didn’t really talk about lullabies because again comp sci assignment but they’re related, so anyway, this has an english translation in there which may or may not be the standard? but you can know what it means too:

[number5theboy]

Wow. Your ask queue has gotten pretty serious today. So I thought about asking you some fun questions as a positive distraction (hopefully). 1) If the UA sibs were throwing a party what would their duties be? 2) 3x5 childhood head canon (since nobody talks abt them) 3) If the UA sibs went to college what majors would they choose?

Dearest Anon, you cannot believe how nice I think this gesture is, I really appreciate and cherish this ask so much, thank you, thank you, thank you.

1) If the UA sibs were throwing a party what would their duties be? 

Allison and Five are in charge of the booze. Both of them know their cocktails and how to mix, and Allison also pulled off enough birthday parties for Claire to know well-tasting, colourful non-alcoholic drinks. They go wild o the decorations, definitely having too much fun with the little paper umbrellas, and Five enjoys playing bartender on the evening (I’m imagining a party in the mansion here) while Allison entertains. Vanya and Luther share the responsibility for both music and food. Luther has absolutely incredible taste in party bangers, but is hopeless with putting together a playlist that doesn’t horribly clash with itself, so he picks songs, Vanya adds some and puts them in the most entertaining order possible. They also put together bite-sized appetizers in the kitchen the entire day leading up to the party, grooving to the playlist made from songs they rejected from the party playlist. Diego helped them out for half the day, but Vanya and Luther have the tendency to make dad jokes, and after a while, Diego couldn’t take it anymore. In the evening, Vanya and Luther put together the sound system, Luther easily carrying the heavy equipment around and Vanya knowing what to do with it. At one point, Luther was carrying a speaker with Vanya perched on top of it, giving commands on where to put what. If you then turn around, you find Team Decorations, Diego, Ben and Klaus. Klaus clearly put his entire heart and soul into the aesthetic of this party, and definitely picked an extravagant and accidentally genius theme, like ‘80s Gothic’. Diego will not admit it, but he did scour the entire house for objects to add to the decoration, and Ben just resigned himself to make sure they had things like cups and plates, but also definitely got a disco ball. So Klaus, Diego and Ben are busy the entire afternoon to put up neon Victorian-style decorations which clash both more and less than expected with the inside of the mansion. Ben uses the tentacles to put garlands up high, just as Klaus manifests ghosts to hoist him up to places where he can’t reach. Diego’s powers help him put up a tower of glasses perfectly. The decoration is wild and fun and everyone’s really happy with it. Ben, Luther and Vanya share the role of photographer for the evening, and they catch a lot of fun family snapshots of the evening. Allison and Five grinning widely behind the bar, little paper umbrellas tucked into their hair. Klaus and Luther on the dancefloor, trying and failing to gracefully remember their Paso Doble lessons from childhood, in the background Five is looking on in horror from behind the bar. Diego and Ben, absolutely mastering the Paso Doble. Vanya, with fluorescent fake cobwebs on her head and Allison in the background, holding up two fingers at the back of Vanya’s head. Luther bear-hugging Diego and Ben. Klaus, his cheeks round with appetizers, making him look like a chipmunk in a very cool skirt. A selfie that Vanya took sitting at the bar, with Five grimacing behind her. Okay I got very much carried away with that idea, I really love it!!

2) 3x5 childhood head canon (since nobody talks abt them) 

Allison and Five, my darlings. I don’t think they were that close growing up, but I think Five must’ve been extremely fascinated by Allison’s powers, as they bent reality. Reginald noticed this interest, and thus used Five the most as a guinea pig to push the limits of Allison’s powers, also because Five had the strongest own will as a kid, always talking back, so cutting him down was in Reginald’s interest. At first, Five was quite intrigued, but Reginald really drove Allison and thus him to the brink, and afterwards, the two of them would sneak up to Allison’s window, just escaping for a bit. They would softly talk about anything but training, sometimes trailing to the future. The last time they did that, before Five got lost in the future, they were thirteen, and they talked about having kids of their own one day. Five, seeing how Reginald treated them, could never imagine having children, but Allison sometimes talked about wanting to have kids one day. It was a conversation replaying in Five’s head when he read Vanya’s book for the first time, and found out that he had a niece he never got to meet, a niece that died along with everyone else, a niece that Allison just have love more than anything in the world. This got sad. Whoops.

3) If the UA sibs went to college what  majors would they choose? 

Oof, that’s always difficult. Luther might do astrophysics, but I can totally see him do botany or English literature as well. Actually, it’d be cute if Ben and him both did English literature, but maybe Luther switched majors at some point, getting Ben to dramatically call him a traitor every time they meet in the university corridors. Diego might do criminology, or social work, but I also see him not go to college at all and rather learn manual work. I have a soft spot for smith Diego, ngl, I think it’d be cool if he could make his own weapons. Also I know he went to police academy in show canon, but just no. Klaus definitely went to college, both for the experience and to test out how much he can push the American education system. He probably did courses like gender studies and might have annoyed Diego in criminology, but totally took some straight white boy classes just to rile people in there up, like economics, business or western philosophy. He genuinely makes friends with at least three frat boys. I know Vanya would go for a violin degree, but after Season 2, I really love the idea of her studying to become a special needs teacher, with a focus on teaching autistic children. Allison definitely did drama, but I love the idea of her also doing media management to get to know the behind the scenes of the entertainment industry, so she can manage herself. And Five honestly could have gone for anything. Clearly, quantum physics is something that fits him well, but I think Five could find interest in almost anything. He could also do languages, in my opinion, or anything with engineering.

[lampd-intheface]

vampire LAMP au

okay but like imagine a vampire au with polysanders except virgil is the only human???

roman got bitten by a vampire in italy just for kicks and then he was left to his own devices. he had to suffer through the shift alone with nobody to help him

for a little while, he was ravenous and accidentally killed a lot of people. in the end, tho, he snapped out of it and taught himself how to control his hunger

roman lived through the italian renaissance and moved between italy and spain (which is why he can speak really good spanish/italian) and even settled down a little in england for some time too

when roman settled down in england, he met patton who'd been a vampire for a while now

patton became a vampire becos he was hit with the plague and his mother was desperate to find a cure. this vampire they met ended up helping and then taking patton under his wing

roman and patton eventually find themselves in america (which was still a pretty new country at the time)

logan lived during the industrial era where everyone was just inventing things left and right and it was booming in terms of science and machinery

he was turned becos a vampire thought his genius was too valuable and death shouldn't put a stop to logan who had a lot of potential

the three then settled down in america

roman made some money writing fantasy books under pseudonyms. logan made money through patents or really any kind of intellectual work he could find. patton spent his time at home, just helping out and taking care of roman and logan

they had to move often, of course, becos people would be suspicious if they just stayed in the same place for too long. they couldn't get attached to people either becos getting attached to people meant people who would keep track of them

after all of their years being alive, patton and logan and roman have amassed enough money that they're just chilling and living comfortably

now, it's the modren era and, in this au, all of them either have online classes and/or night classes

virgil takes night classes and online classes because it limits his social interaction with other people and he's much more comfortable interacting with smaller groups of classmates (night classes)/not physically interacting with classmates at all (online classes)

the others because well duh they're vampires

it's not becos they dont like sunlight (they can be exposed to a little but too much gives them rashes). it's just that it's easier to keep a low profile if they interact with less people

logan is really the only one seriously taking classes and not for any other reason than because he loves learning. patton and roman will take classes here and there but only for their hobbies

insert virgil. i haven't thought this one through but logan probably meets him first because they share a class together.

anyway, LAMP have a meet cute or whatever

maybe like virgil is in an art history class and the prof says something wrong abt a certain part of history

logan is about to correct the prof but virgil beats him to it and logan is impressed with how accurate virgil was with his facts because logan lived that era and not a lot of people are so knowledgeable about it

that aside, their friendship takes time

logan has to introduce patton and roman separately and then the three of them have to keep attempting to get closer to virgil slowly and at virgil's pace

eventually, for their own reasons, they fall in love with virgil

logan falls in love with how much he relates to virgil. virgil is so smart and the two of them can talk and have debates and virgil just understands him so well

roman falls in love with how snarky virgil is becos he'll tease virgil and he knows virgil will serve it right back to him. virgil challenges him and its exhilarating and exciting

patton falls in love with how soft virgil is and how much he wants to protect virgil from all the bad things in the world. he loves how virgil has been through so much and yet virgil is still so strong

virgil is unaware of how smitten the three of them are tho and he falls in love with them too. he kind of just... plans to be with whoever asks him out first (if any of them ask him out at all)

because virgil struggles with his anxiety a lot, he can't really work at normal places. there's too many interactions, too many people.

he had thought that he'd eventually get used to it and then he'd be able go get a job but it's taking him a lot of time to get over his anxiety

precious time he can't really afford since he's putting himself through college

which is where his vamp boyfriends friends come in because hello, if they can't pay for their cute human crush's essential college classes, then what's the point of having all that money?

in any case, they find out abt virgil's financial problems and they're like omg... we're the solutions to his problem!!!

roman: i can finally actually slay what ails virgil!!!

logan: you won't be slaying anything--

roman: LET ME HAVE THIS ONE THING

before they establish that sort of relationship though, logan and roman and patton all agree that they want virgil to know the real them first so that virgil can decide whether or not he wants to be associated with them

the last thing they want to do is make virgil feel like he's obligated to stay with them even tho he fears them becos they're paying for his college and housing him and stuff

so, they plan get to know virgil more and then tell virgil they're kind of sort of creatures of the night

definitely easier said than done

when they tell virgil, he's like *phone error sound* ??? before realizing oh my God, they're serious

he then laughs about it a little and the other three are confused but he clarifies that the situation was very ironic

becos like omg, how hilarious is that??? the one goth guy who's super pale and avoids social contact and is practically the stereotypical vampire is actually the only one that's NOT a vampire??? that's irony at its finest

virgil then also assures them that the three of them being vampires doesn't bother him one bit

virgil, the epitome of tumblr humor: bold of you to assume i wouldn't f**k a supernatural being

jokes aside, he does reveal to them that he couldn't care less about what species they were, just that they loved him and he loved them

and damn did virgil love those three idiots

roman: woah there, you might pull a muscle from all the i love you's you're spouting

virgil, sweating up a storm after showing the most emotional vulnerability in his life: sh*t u rite

jokes aside, they do form a sort of weird relationship where the three of them happily provide for virgil because virgil doesnt have the means to do so

it takes virgil a while to really get used to it since he's not used to accepting things from other people without giving back

he struggles for a little while becos he keeps trying to find ways to repay them for what they do for him but there's only so much he can do

eventually they have a conversation abt it and they're like babe honey sweetie no

patton: you give us your love and that's the absolute most important and priceless thing in the world!!!

virgil, known pessimist who cringes away from romantic gestures out of habit: sounds fake but ok

but like eventually they work it out in like a slowly but surely kind of way.

virgil learns to see money the same way the other three do (replaceable and pretty much worthless to vampires who have a large abundance of it) and the other three learn to kind of tone it down on the expensive gifts

virgil: im so glad you guys dont buy me really expensive things now

roman, sweating profusely as he hides the golden apple he had commissioned to be made especially for virgil: oH YEAH OFC HAHAHA

(logan, when roman had suggested getting virgil the golden apple: first of all, no??? in what way is that even romantic--)

omg imagine if virgil does the thing where he coops himself up in his room??? and then someone tries to get him to get out by pulling the blinds open to let in light??? and virgil hisses???

patton, having just let sunlight in, looking absolutely offended: OKAY FIRST OF ALL, you're not a vampire so don't take that tone of hiss with me--

someone is like teasing or bullying virgil abt his aesthetic and virgil is obviously getting uncomfortable, esp when they call him twilight (in reference to the vampire romance novel)

so one of the boys, probably roman, steps up and he's like 'the person you should call twilight is me' and he scares the bullies by flashing his eyes red and showing them his fangs

omg!!! roman doesn't have a reflection so virgil helps him put on make up or smth!!!

maybe virgil in this au is an artist so he paints a picture of all three of them so they know what they look like becos they dont show up on pictures and reflections

patton, gazing down at the picture: this is what true love feels like

logan, also feeling the same way: really? how unpleasant

logan:

logan: give me more

omg also logan having only really kept up with the intellectual side of history so he doesn't know abt memes and like stuff like that so virgil teaches him and he has his Flashcards™

iDK MAN JUST VAMPIRE BOYS BEING SOFT FOR EACH OTHER AND FOR THIS SMALL LITTLE HUMAN THEYVE PULLED UNDER THEIR (bat) WINGS

[disaster-fruit]

and I know it's unfair because I haven't answered the ask yet but you're Brazilian so you know way more than me but I'd love to hear your thoughts about Imperial Brazil?? I'm really struggling with him bc i know about him in this era more from a portuguese perspective.....

YOU THOUGHT I WOULDN’T ANSWER THIS HUH 

Sorry for taking so damn long audshdf I was saving this ask to do a real deep dive into the whole empire with a lot of historical explanation and a lot of detail buuuut I was having some trouble coherently organizing my thoughts about Pedro II’s reign so instead I’m gonna use this ask to more loosely talk abt the first half of the empire. You’ve seen my basic thoughts on the second half on that other post, so now I’m gonna ramble mostly about 1808-1840.

Also, hm, this is LONG. It’s embarrassingly long. I hope you have time. 

And yes 1808-1822 is not part of the empire, but Brazil was no longer a colony in practice during those years, and I think they were crucial to his development as a person. 

Before 1808, Brazil pretty much grew up alone. His mother was around less and less, and he had no friends. Portugal was, as we already know, a shitty dad. Up to that point, he was not only absent but also very controlling. He never allowed Brazil or his people to learn how to read, Brazil wasn’t allowed to have libraries or universities or newspapers or even print. Portugal alienated Brazil both from his mother and from Port himself. He was forcefully kept from developing his own ideas, and his growth was stagnant – even physically. The way I see it, after 300 years he was still a small child, while the others around him were already growing into teenagers even though they were younger in actual numbers. Portugal literally kept him from developing as a person, by force. 

But suddenly, Portugal needed him. Suddenly, he showed up at his shore, with hundreds of people, and objects, and books. And though Portugal desperately needed Brazil at that time, his king couldn’t be there with Brazil being like that. That land with no cities and no libraries and no economy no nothing because he was forced to have nothing. 

He starts growing really, really fast, and forcefully again. And it was a painful process – his people were being kicked out of their houses so that the people that arrived from Portugal had where to live. In a few years, he grew almost as fast as humans did. But it was still an incomplete growth – most of his people were still living in misery, but now he had a structured state that allowed him to more firmly fit into what a nation means. But it all happened so fast he was… dizzy. 

And that was all combined with what was happening in his relationship with his father. They had both gotten much closer now that Portugal was physically there more often. I think Portugal is considerably less shitty to Brazil during these years, both because he needs him and because he is a relief from everything going on in Europe. But that doesn’t mean he became a good dad, but also Brazil was a lot smarter now, a lot freer, and quick to realize something that had always been true – Portugal needed Brazil more than Brazil needed Portugal. Much more. 

The fact that he wasn’t a colony anymore but wasn’t quite independent, and thus still had to obey Portugal to some degree, started to annoy him. This has quite a bit of teenage rebellion element into it, but that doesn’t mean it came from unjustified anger. Not at all. His pride and ego were starting to really develop. The king of Portugal liked him better than he liked port himself, Brazil was heaven on earth, Brazil was rich, Brazil was full of potential, Brazil was great, Brazil was paradise, Brazil was not his own.  

And that just keeps building.

And when Portugal starts talking about making him a colony again. After all that shit about the being a united kingdom, about Portugal being his father and trying to get close to him, of seeing him as a refuge and a relief, after all of that connection I think Portugal genuinely tried to build with him, the ugly truth is bare again – Portugal never saw him as worthy of equal footing, never saw that united kingdom as anything but temporary, never saw brazil as anything more than a colony. 

And Brazil is mad. 

When he found out the plans of Pedro I to declare independence, he’s more than happy. He’s been thinking of it for a while, and I think maybe deep down he didn’t love the idea of another Portuguese man being his boss, but Pedro had grown up in brazil, dude was carioca at heart, his wife was wonderful, Brazil could work with that. He declared independence, fought against Portugal, won, still had to pay for his independence, but, at last, he got it. 

I think in a way Brazil’s anger, as righteous as it was, did blind him to what was going on. He wanted so bad to get rid of Portugal and avoid going back to how it was when he was a colony, that he waved away or even approved things that really just kept him stuck in the same place. Very little actually changed for most people, and as someone who literally represented all the people, he knew that and could feel that, but he was still so euphoric personally about it that he… ignored it. 

Pedro I’s reign was… messy. He needed a constitution, he got into a war with Argentina, everyone was talking about who Pedro was fucking, it was just a whole mess. For that reason, I think despite declaring his independence, brazil remembers Pedro as being mostly an irresponsible asshole who couldn’t keep it in his pants and was too busy being a playboy to rule this country yet still managed to be authoritarian and also made him lose Uruguay. And when it came time for him to choose Brazil or Portugal, just like his father, he chooses Portugal. 

That was a blow on his ego. Brazil at this point was still just a teenager, who had in two decades grown insanely fast for a nation, has been told by each king his land was heaven on earth and so much richer than Portugal, yet no one was willing to choose him. Ever. He was still an afterthought. Like a colony, that still had a metropolis. Pedro left him with a 4-year-old, with a government disorganized, and no money. 

And then the Provinces start to rise up. 

So, hm, a quick background on how I see the provinces: Some of them existed since around 1530, some were younger and some weren't around yet, and if Brazil first appeared representing the people that were born in this new colony, the provinces were much more… administrative and political. Yet many of the ones that were around grew much faster than Brazil – they were already teenagers or even adults by independence. They had always responded directly to Portugal and for a long time saw no connection between themselves or between them and Brazil. The idea of “Brazil” was only like… 100 years old, even less than that. And some of them were not loving being attached to those two kids – Brazil and the baby emperor. They saw the weak government of the regency as a chance to rise up and declare their own independence, as many who started as provinces around them had – like Uruguay.

The regency lasted 9 years, but I think those few years were also crucial to form Brazil as a person, due to how stressful they were. Think about it, he saw what was happening around him, with Spain’s former colonies. And I think he for the first time had to grapple with the very human existential fear of death. 

If each of his provinces became their own country, would he still be around? Would he just become… Rio? But Rio existed as a province too. Would he just… be a lot of different countries? Probably not.  He would probably disappear. He had only just started to be allowed to live, but that could be taken away at any moment. Uruguay and Rio Grande do Sul succeeded in getting their independence. How long until the others? It was quite terrifying. And I think that experience not only made him averse to the idea of being a republic in general at the time, but also created a lot of emotional and psychological problems for him, a lot of insecurity, as well as it made him realize he was nothing. There was nothing to justify his existence. He couldn’t say he existed because he wanted freedom or republic, he had none of these, plus it was something the provinces too could have. What united that land? What made him him? Those were all questions that would haunt him for the rest of the empire, and he would soon be more than willing to go after and accept easy answers. That’s how he gets to that whole indianismo think I talked about some time ago.

He fights his own provinces, on people, countless times. Revolts that really were like civil wars kept popping, and he, who was just a teenager, had to fight to oppress his provinces and force them into being a part of him, for a reason he himself didn’t know. He couldn’t explain why they should be a part of him, except that they were and he wanted them to be and he wanted to live. And he didn’t know why.

In summary, this whole period was one of fear, and insecurity, and doubt. It shook him profoundly as a person more than as a country. Because once Pedrinho was in power, things were quick to stabilize and it was, in some ways, as if those revolts had never happened, but Brazil remembered them, he lived through them, and never really forgot that fear. 

If the regency was marked by external peace and internal turmoil, Pedrinho’s reign was one of relatively internal peace and external turmoil. Pedro II was… a complicated figure. Most Brazilians today regard him as an excellent ruler and a wise man, but I at least can’t be this optimistic about the man who insisted on the Paraguayan war, refused to abolish slavery for decades, and basically laid ground to a lot of the problems we still have today, like bad distribution of land and late industrialization. He didn’t do all that by himself, of course, a lot can be blamed on the senate, but he was the most powerful man on the country, and he receives way too much credit for his personal beliefs of being an abolitionist and a pacifist. Maybe he really was both these things, but that doesn’t change the fact that he didn’t use his power to end slavery and avoid war, quite the opposite. And why is that important here? Because I think brazil, the tan, was also fooled by it. He quickly bought into the narrative that Pedro II was this wise incredible man, and overlooked all the ways he kept the worst structures of the country untouched in order to not upset the elite that kept him in power. Brazil wanted nothing but stability and power, and Pedro, looking like the opposite of his father at the surface, brought that. There were no more separatist movements or civil wars once he rose to power, Rio Grande do Sul was reabsorbed, and the years that followed were ones of relative prosperity, and all of that really made brazil more and more attached to the whole concept of the empire. I think just like he was willing to ignore a lot of things during independence for the sake of it, here too he ignored all the ways Pedro II held him back so that he could fully feel the pride of being a powerful empire.

Brazil really did like being an empire during that time. The narrative of the empire was one that answered the question that haunted him for so long – what justified his existence. Justifying it, in the 19th century, is what I believe to be the main motivation underlying everything he did and thought. And the narrative was that the empire guaranteed stability and avoided civil wars and fragmentation, allowing Brazil to be, to quote José Bonifacio, “This majestic and solid piece of social architecture from the Prata to the Amazonas”, and again, all that in comparison to his neighbors that were constantly drowning in civil wars and fragmenting. For stability and that justification, he was willing to turn a blind eye to anything else.

So he rose from the regency feeling stronger than ever. Pedrinho had put everything into place, he was growing, he had a Brazilian in power for the first time, his coffee was going well, and he had survived. Many of his neighbors hadn’t, or at least not in the sense of managing to keep their territories intact. He did. His neighbors were unstable, with wars and coups and wars (like he hadn’t just had exactly that), he was stable and growing and he was the strongest. Once free of the fear of being destroyed from the inside, his ego grew once again, and he felt good. He felt pride in being a big strong and centralized empire, and to look down on the other Latin Americans and even on his father. He was ready now to make his power and influence spread, as an Empire. 

That's it, sorry if this is both ridiculously long and also a mess, I have way too many thoughts about imperial brazil and I could've probably written ten more pages of it and still have something to say. Also I'd still love to hear your thoughts on the empire for a Portuguese perspective, because I genuinely have no clue what that would look like. But anyway hmm I hope this was fun? 

[seijch]

BY DAY, you attend classes and sling drinks at the campus cafe. By night, you’re known as the Harbinger, an individual with the Gift of shadow and darkness. Your two jobs have never had any reason to collide…not until the appearance of a fellow Gifted by the name of Ace, anyway.

[ read luck of the draw here !! ]

this is an extra post for me to infodump on all the worldbuilding details i never got to fit into my already obnoxiously large fic 🕺🏻🕺🏻 its holding my brain hostage so maybe posting this will help!!!

please read luck of the draw before clicking the readmore !! there are spoilers abound (and you probably won’t understand much of what i’m saying if you haven’t read the fic LMAO)

ABOUT THE CONCEPT

the very core of luck of the draw isn’t actually unique to kenji or to haikyuu in general; in fact, it was originally a part of a superhero!skz series i was planning to write but never got around to. the foundation of this fic -- kenji’s power and the idea of them being opposing forces that slowly draw together -- was originally given to stray kids’ hyunjin. i never went past the Thinking Stage with it, so it was fairly easy to hand the concept over to futakuchi when i moved fandoms.

the dynamic of this fic in general was inspired pretty heavily by miraculous ladybug’s “love square,” but i ... obviously wasn’t going to write all four sides of it so i stuck to the civilian identities (the reader and kenji) and the alteregos (harbinger and ace). in the kpop version of this wip, the reader and hyunjin were coworkers, but in moving from one fandom to another and reworking it for futakuchi, i decided to make them friends instead. they’re not particularly close (they’re definitely comfortable but not close Emotionally) to start with, but there’s potential for something to start!

ABOUT THE WORLD

in this universe, the city is ruled by two major factions that control much of the economy: seijoh, who controls the entertainment/tourism industries and has its fingers in most of the smaller businesses around the city (such as johzenji and dateko) and nekoma, who is partnered with the equally large fukurodani to control shipment of all kinds as well as the food industry (among others). nekoma has allies within the local government, and seijoh all but controls the law enforcement.

karasuno, on the other hand, works entirely from the underground to overhaul the way things are run in the city; it’s a bit .... corrupt as of right now, and they seek to change that. 

at the top are typically individuals blessed with special powers known as gifts. these gifts can be as mundane as the ability to make flowers bloom wherever you walk or as powerful as being able to alter the flow of time. there exist a series of regulations (and a shit ton of paperwork) that come about whenever an individual happens to manifest a gift. 

however, the city’s gifted demographic is incorrectly represented; a chunk of the gifted population are instead drawn to the allure of making money by doing illicit deeds for companies like seijoh or nekoma. these individuals’ gifts are never properly documented due to the traceability it lends itself to, should a job go wrong.

the government is supposedly in talks to enact stricter laws on the gifted, despite them making up a comparatively small percentage of the population. the head of the department of gifted individuals, ushijima wakatoshi, is a particularly overwhelming force in support of better regulation of his fellow gifted.

ABOUT THE CHARACTERS

in the first draft of luck of the draw, the sequence of events and relationship dynamics were MUCH different. in the final draft, you see the alteregos being drawn to each other first before you see the civilians come together. 

in that first draft, it was originally centered on the civilians getting together despite kinda-sorta being attracted to each other’s alterego? as a result, the kiss scene between the alteregos was still there but it was DRASTICALLY different. the whole idea of it and imo moral ambiguitity (kenji and the reader never went official with their relationship in the first draft) didn’t sit right with me at all; it felt a little like i was using cheating as a plot device which ??? no.

to make the long story short, the execution of that (tbh poorly developed) idea was.......less than stellar.

so i took a look at the chronology and basically upended the entire midsection to make the concept something that was less awful morally? that’s what i hope happened, anyway LJSKDFLSD

in the first draft, the reader (as harbinger) was also much less competent than they are in the final draft as a result of having been affiliated with karasuno for a shorter time. in truth, the harbinger’s origin story didn’t surface until i was in the middle of writing the second draft!

when it comes to the other characters:

oikawa doesn’t have a gift, which is rather rare for someone with their thumb sitting so heavily on the city’s pulse point

iwaizumi’s gift is entirely up to interpretation! him and oikawa making formal appearances in the story was something that only came up towards the end of draft two, so i didn’t have the space (word count wise) to really give either much thought

kyotani came into his gift without any control over it, and is only given amnesty because he was found hiding by iwaizumi

i really really wanted to talk about kyotani in this fic but ultimately it wasnt revolving around him + i once again didn’t have space to even tease an encounter with him (so in the fic proper he’s mostly there as a cameo + to scare you as you read into a potential action scene)

aone and kenji actually come from the same company that happened to come under seijoh’s control, so they’re more comfortable with each other than anyone else!

hinata has the gift of manipulation as long as you’re making eye contact with him; unfortunately, if he wills it, it’s rather hard to break eye contact once you’ve made it -- aone made the mistake of glancing at him during the takeover at seijoh hq, leading to his hold on harbinger loosening

kageyama obviously has the gift of ice/hail/snow manipulation to a rather strong extent, considering he can create it where there is none and lower the temperature of the air around him (the reader cannot create their own darkness, only manipulate what is around them)

he also has some beef with oikawa (or is it the other way around?) that involves him formerly working under seijoh -- not one of their many smaller companies, but seijoh itself (much like iwaizumi and after kageyama leaves, kyotani)

in terms of who’s been with karasuno the longest of the introduced cast, it’s tsukishima/three-eyes > hinata = kageyama > reader (but not by much)

MISCELLANEOUS

following the takeover of seijoh, tsukishima finds himself at wit’s end much more often LMAO

there are a good amount of deleted scenes and scenes that were only added in at the very last second!

among the deleted scenes is a scene where the civilians are at the park -- in the first draft, it happened in the middle, but in the second it was towards the end. it got taken out because come the end of the second draft, i realized it no longer fit ...

in terms of completion status, it probably ?? took a little over a month from this to go from Thinking Stage to the 14.2k monstrosity you see now? there were a couple of weeks early on where i did nothing on my ipad and laptop except outline and write, respectively

i definitely got burned out halfway through (which is abt the time i posted the xc2 au .. i NEEDED to work on smth else)

the idea of the clock tower wasn’t present at all in the first draft!! i only really came up with it in the second draft because i’d rather have them meet somewhere consistent and identifiable rather than some nondescript building

the running joke (?) of them getting drinks together wasn’t present until the third and final draft -- originally the scene where ace asks “do you remember our last conversation?” had a different beginning

in fact, a lot of the scenes that are a bit more...emotionally charged (see: every scene after ace’s unmasking as well as the movie night scene where the civilians struggle to define what their relationship has become) had to be overhauled dramatically

ummm i love kenji thats it! none of this would be possible if i didnt have the strongest mf brainrot for him so ... ! theres that LMAO

(theres probably more im forgetting to say ........ if any of you want to pick my brain regarding the chronology or the characters or why i had them say something or do something send me an ask! this post tbh is almost entirely for me but i didnt put this much thought into a fic that long to NOT share it with everyone else)

[lanamemories2]

rides onto the dash nude n on horseback like this pic of sam way. oh fancy seeing u here.......... im impeccably tensed our entire exchange. buns like steel cld crack a nut open between them. i’m nai n it’s so nice to meet u all!!!! i’m one of the admins here (josefine frida pettersen on the main) n i’m so Excited 2 get things going........... some facts abt me r i sometimes hv a witch’s cackle, i once drunkenly swung frm a tree branch pretending to b tarzan n fell n grass stained my fav jeans at 4 in the morning n i lov spicy food despite the fact it mkes me sweat like a hog in the sun. more abt lana under the cut!!! also like this or hmu if u wna plot n her pinterest is here n playlist is here 👺🌚

「kristine froseth & cis-female」⇾ jameson , lana, the junior radcliffe student’s records show that she is a gemini and 22 years old. she is studying dance, living in off campus and can be vivacious, passionate, childish & impulsive. when i see her i am reminded of stepping out in the cold wearing just a red slip, lipstick on a stranger’s throat, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘SCRAPPY DOO IS A FILTHY SLUT’. ⇽「nai & 23 & gmt & she/her.」

AESTHETICS:

scalding your fingers in shower water until they glow like rudolph’s nose, cherry red gym socks tugged high and nothing else, stepping out in the cold wearing just a red slip, an origami swan made from an old receipt, tickling a stranger’s chin with the end of a feather boa, crowning each finger with a miniature raspberry, hugging a knee close to lick a stripe of fruit juice off a bruise there, doodling penises in the condensation of a car window, a water pistol topped with rum and covered in glittery pin-up stickers, believable smiles that feel more like baring teeth, a bumper sticker on the back of a convertible cadillac that says ‘SCRAPPY DOO IS A FILTHY SLUT’, prancing around in your underwear to a vinyl record with the curtains open.

HISTORY:

lana grew up in a big house in albany, NY. albums framed on the walls. mayb some rolling stone covers too frm way bk when of the bands her dad’s label signed. kind of like… a rock star palace w no evidence of children at all. i think i summarised it best in one of lana’s self paras once when i said the garden ws “as big as it was unloved”, not that u wld know from all of the gardener’s pruning

lana’s mum victoria (vic) ws a music journalist w a pretty fruitful career ahead of her when she met lana’s dad richard (rich). his record label ws jst starting out, founded on the coattails of his rich best friend’s (jensen peters) investment w his other best friend (who he jst calls knoxville). it rocketed to success when they signed poppy injects, a rock band w an electric stage presence, n victoria ws drawn to the glitz n glamour of a man tht ws at the helm of his aspiring industry. their love ws very impulsive, all or nothing right frm the start, n it ws almost like she ws mre in love w his accomplishments n what he represented than him

anyway so jameson records repped a few big rock bands bk in the eighties, altho poppy injects r who they’re mostly known fr, namely bc of hw brightly they crashed n burned. (drugs/addiction tw) they were a big chart success bt the lead singer hd quite an intense struggle w heroin (wsnt rly subtle abt it either while he ws in the public eye as u cn probably imagine frm such an on-the-nose band name) n he ws always in n out of the papers. it eventually brought down his career n it ws a big publicity nightmare

lana pretty much… grew up around figures like this throughout childhood. rly troubled characters who wld kind of… b extremely volatile n destructive abt their troubles. the jameson house was kind of an open one as welcoming clients went n a lot of parties took place there. a lot of the time musicians wld b snorting lines in the kitchen when she wnted to grab a bowl of cereal fr breakfast. very strange environment fr a child to grow up in

her parents always kind of jst… didn’t like her much. her older brother caleb ws unplanned bt they sort of welcomed the surprise more bt… quickly realised they weren’t cut out fr parenthood n then when lana came as another surprise 3 yrs later they didn’t even try to hide their resentment abt the situation. her mum ws actually booked in to have an abortion bt cldnt go through with it at the last minute. once when lana asked her why shes so cold towards her she jst turned her head frm her dresser, looked at her, told her abt this n said “idk why i didn’t go”. lana didn’t kno wht to say to tht so she jst left her room n closed the door

(dissociation/delusion tw) bc of this growing up lana adopted this weird like…. she didn’t rly kno what it ws bt it ws a delusion of sorts where she thought she ws a ghost. she’d jst sort of… drift around the halls w noone acknowledging her n sometimes she ws jst convinced she wsnt actually there or they cldnt see her n she ws jst haunting the house frm a previous family

the one saving grace tho tht sort of?? gt her thru this n made her feel Seen ws caleb. lana quite genuinely hs always thought the sun shines out of her older brothers ass like she jst thinks. hes the best person in the entire world. wld b rly bewildered if anyone questioned tht. he wld always look out for her in the zoo they called a home n cut the crusts off her PBJs so they lkd like teddy bears (he’d cook fr them most of the time bc their parents were too busy/didn’t care to) n sometimes wld even sleep at the bottom of her bed curled up like a guard dog. it ws always lana n caleb n his best friend tommy against the world in tht house (tommy lived next door n was always over bc he had very strict parents / a military father tht he found suffocating)

SO when caleb n tommy announced tht they’d signed up to the army lana ws understandably…….. blindsided. she ws rly upset tht they were leaving like pretty besides herself bt she tried not to b mad at them n made them promise theyd b safe n back as soon as possible. she even asked if they cld somehow take her w them n they were jst like :/ it doesn’t work that way luv x

(death tw, ptsd tw, grief tw, trauma tw, hospitalisation tw, drugs tw) anyway caleb ended up getting discharged under grounds of severe ptsd when he witnessed tommy die in an explosion tht took place in a shock raid. caleb returned home sans tommy bt he was never the same after tht. he’s been in n out of hospital n he turned to using as a way to cope so it’s been a rly bumpy road since. lana kind of felt like two of her brothers died out there in a way n jst like tht it wasn’t them vs the world any mre, it was jst her

ANYWAY whew tht rly…. took a dark turn there….. chuckles nervously at hw sad lana’s life is bt it’s fine it’s all fINE!!!!!!! ok. so on a mre lighthearted note the jameson family r pretty well off n bc of her relation to such a big music industry figure she’s hung out w a fair few relatively high rep ppl thru her teens. mostly kids of celebrities n stuff like tht. she amassed kind of an instagram following mainly fr her style (penny lane-esque in some aspects aka lots of fur cuff trimmed jackets bt then also jst…. a wild combination of everything honestly. pastel faux fur coats, seventies style platforms, flame red cowboy boots, pink fishnet tights n glitter used like highlight Everywhere) n bc she’s undeniably Pretty Gorl

(trauma tw) after caleb got back he was rly withdrawn n depressed. he shut lana out n was kind of harsh to her a lot of the time, always telling her to leave him alone or pushing her away. it didnt help either tht lana had a rly traumatic experience w some of her dad’s colleagues at the label when she ws 16 n he was away n she cldnt even tell him abt it once he was bk bc of his own traumas. she kind of jst shut it all in n kept it to herself

(hypersexuality tw) this obviously?? made her spiral a lot. she was already a girl tht loved sex but since her trauma it got…. completely out of hand. it got to a point where she couldnt rly go 2 days without it, probably not even 1. her lowest point has probably been scrolling thru craiglist for anonymous encounters n meeting up w strangers on there fr hookups even tho it’s insanely dangerous n she cld wind up getting herself killed. the risk is honestly part of the appeal to her sometimes she’s :////// quite self destructive n jst likes a thrill to mke her feel Alive. it’s v clear at this point tht she has a sex addiction whether she’s ever admitted it or not. it kind of… almost mingled w tht same feeling she used to get when she ws younger of being a ghost?? like she jst. only rly feels Real when she’s being touched

(violence tw) she’s had.................... SCH a bad history dating wise. she almost always dates fking.... actual beasts like i jst wna gently shake her by the shoulders sometimes bt :////////////// one of her recent exes is in prison aftr he beat up someone she’d slept w in front of her like she jst. has had a very Not Sexy time w romance...... she hd to b a witness in the trial abt it n he ws found guilty n sent down so it ws like Intense n a gd example of the kinds of disastrous relationships she gets herself into. perks of being a wallflower voice: We Accept The Love We Think We Deserve.

this past summer she gt a job at a burlesque club in downtown lovell!!! it honestly is her dream job like. dancing? being sexy? fav hobbies................. most delicious pastimes... 10/10 ideal fr her............... she almost started working at a coyote ugly bar bt this one won her over. she usually jets off to some foreign country n has a rly exotic n action packed summer bt i think she wldv just been working local there fr this one to b close to her brother (the rehab he’s at is close like a 40 min drive so!). she’s also moved into a big lofty apartment w 3 roommates tht’s above a chinese take out w lots of lanterns hung outside. the street? scott street......................... tribute to mizz phoebe bridgers hunger games salutes to the sky so it travels 2 her............. she gt a red heart shaped bath tub installed which hs always been her dream so honestly the summer hs been pretty gd to her....... five stars on yelp she deserves Some happiness once in a while

PERSONALITY:

always smells vaguely of wild cherries or strawberry starburst or jst the candy aisle in general. if she ws a vinyl record she’d b this one n she’d only play good vibrations by the beach boys, dancing on my own by robyn, play that funky music by wild cherry, femme fatale by the velvet underground n (i can’t get no) satisfaction by the rolling stones

growing up lana was always a HUGE social butterfly. knew everyone n everyone knew her. she ws one of those girls tht ws kind of impossible to ignore or forget (cld b a gd or bad thing depends on ur Stance...... she can be a lot tho frankly). very animated, always made u feel like u were the centre of the universe whenever she spoke to u, always made it feel like u were best friends even if ud only spoken to her once.

deliberately puts on tht kind of Magnetic Alluring act tht femme fatales wear in movies sometimes. kind of…. is always playing A Role of the person tht she wants to b seen as or the person she feels ppl want her to be. chameleons to situations. feels like she’s performed as the vivacious n fun loving Lana Jameson fr so long tht she doesn’t rly kno who she is beneath tht bt she isn’t too keen to find out

always the last one awake at the party. jst doesn’t seem to hv.... an off switch. every1 else cld b passed out at 6am n she’d still b swaying around to sunday morning by the velvet underground in her underwear drinking frm a bottle of merlot

she’s always been rly spontaneous n adventurous. always doing something weird n wild every weekend. she has ten thousand ridiculously absurd n chaotic stories

uncontrollably flirty. she’s tht tumblr post tht’s like flirting will b ur hubris n the reply is like kind of sexy of u to say so................ SO confident cld talk to anyone. makes a joke out of anything. tends to laugh when she feels like crying. even if she DOES cry she’ll smile thru it like it isn’t happening she jst.... doesn’t like to b negative ever if she cn help it

she’s amassed a weird collection of like... Things various ppl she’s known hv made abt her. this guy she ws friends w wrote a song abt her n performed it at a gig she went to without telling her in advance. it ws rly dramatic he sang it n looked at her the whole time n she ws jst a bit like.... omg.... lmfao............... she’s also hd various paintings done of her. i honestly dnt even rly kno hw it happens she jst has a personality where she..... leaves an impression like a lipstick print on a white shirt w some ppl.................. she’s like tht tumblr post where someone arrives at a poetry reading n is like hi yes........ where do the muses sit? except she isn’t rly.... obnoxious abt it she jst shrugs n is like.......... oh that........... KJHSFKHGSFKGHSFKGSFHGK. it’s a charmed life fr some

always dapples her fingers thru the breeze when she’s driving in a car w the window down. she almost always has some sort of sweet on her, whether it’s sour haribo cherries or strawberry lollipops.

PLOTS:

exes tht lana’s fucked over hideously. she’d probably cheat a lot and it’d be a whole…mess. whips her in the town square like gale

mayb someone tht flipped the switch and cheated on her??? chaos. anguish. strife. 

someone tht works at the burlesque club in downtown lovell w her!!!!! as like a bartender or another dancer or security or................... whtvr honestly. hvn’t worked out a name fr the club yet bt i think it cld b a fun setting to write stuff in n there cld b lots to build off there!!

a cousin plot cld b fun too

her n freya nilsen run smthn called Dick Sisters Inc......... they hv a twitter fr it n everything.... n a hq based in one of the abandoned dorms in the leach building.... lots of inflatable furniture disco balls.............. lana even gt replica airplane seats so they cn sit n b served drinks by this guy tht runs errands fr them who they call bucket....... they bsically like. set ppl up n help ppl get laid it’s a matchmaking service of sorts.......... started as a joke bt nw it’s genuinely become quite a profitable business w word spreading all over campus........ ugh entrepreneurial icons... anyway mayb ur chara cld come to lana fr Dick Sisters assistance......... mayb they’v come to them in the past......... 

a friend tht lana fel out w bc she slept w their significant other.

someone tht’s getting lana into drugs?? she’s kind of impressionable/down for anything so tht’s a likely scenario she’d get into tbh

briefly did camgirl stuff on an independent bt up n coming porn site....... titters.......... mayb ur muse used a pseudonym n recognises lana frm it bt is too embarrassed to admit they were subscribed............ mayb they happened upon her on there once n nw r jst like. what do i do w this knowledge. idk cld b fun to work around perhaps

an unrequited crush!! (either way is cool)

someone tht is just hanging out w her/using her bc she has a lot of instagram followers or they want to b signed to her dad’s label

someone in a band!! she’d probably make like penny lane n b their groupie/sleep w them all i won’t lie to u. relentless.....

umm a good influence too mayb?

honestly?? anything is fine i cld ramble for days. mayb even one of the high profile kids she grew up hangin w idk. world’s our oyster fellas!