A smile Is the cure for all ills... Always smile 😂😘💯
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My wish for Xiao Zhan - may you have more reasons to smile each day, everyday! Happy 32nd birthday to Xiao Zhan
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I’m death is sneaking closer and closer without you knowing it : )
-happyface
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btw i think it's so awesome and fun when older people dye their white hair purple or pink or blue or whatever colour they fancy and 'overdress' in bright eye catching ostentatious outfits and have quirky interests and styles. you don't have to be young to have fun and be confident! you can still enjoy life when you're old! who cares what anyone else thinks, you've lived longer than they have and know better than to waste it being miserable just to fit in.
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Mestre Kento passando aqui pra te desejar um feliz ano novo, e pedir para que vcs não se esqueçam de sempre dar um grande sorriso ✌️😁, porque apesar de todas as dificuldades, a vida continua sendo maravilhosa, com vários momentos incríveis! Então aproveitem todos eles ao máximo; sorria quando quiser sorrir e chore quando quiser chorar, afinal, a capacidade de expressar emoções é o que faz de nós seres humanos :) É isso, que Deus abençoe o nosso 2024! 💚
Happy new year! 🫰
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”Vulnerability is the birthplace of
connection and the path to the
feeling of worthiness.
If it doesn’t
feel vulnerable, the sharing is
probably not constructive.”
🌿 🌺 🌿
" We Are One….
Nothing but Love Here…" ℒℴѵℯ
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Innocent youthfulness
Captured by Mirna Abdelbary
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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i saw your username in the corner of my eye and thought it said “fatbabydamian”.
THIS MADE ME BURST OUT LAUGHING 😭 i dedicated a csp file called fatbabydamian bc of you ty
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