Bingqiu AU where Luo Binghe's the chosen village sacrifice to the evil deity who lives up the mountain.
Normally the village sends maidens, but they've more or less run out of expendable girls of the right age and, ahem, "virtues". So of course Luo Binghe's early life bad luck kicks in. In the wake of his mother's death there's no one to really care about what happens to him, he's fairly pretty, and the village leaders decide that if they dress him up like a girl the teenaged homeless kid should pass well enough. And hey, y'know, he's probably got a hard life ahead for him anyway -- dying in a brothel of some venereal disease or on the streets of exposure or starvation. At least as a sacrifice, everyone else gets to benefit from his loss! And the kid will get added to a shrine and be remembered as a hero! If anything, he should be happy about this!
Binghe is not happy about this.
But he's also a skinny underfed nobody who is easily overpowered, dressed up like a bride, and tied to a post. So. Not much he can do but wait for the evil deity to come and do whatever horrible thing he's gonna do to him.
Meanwhile, Shen Yuan is pretty sure he's been isekai'd into the over-powered hero of some kind of supernatural adventure story? He's not totally sure because he doesn't recognize the setting, but the signs are there. He's got a shrine-like base of operations (though it seems to have become corrupted/ruined, probably he has to restore it somehow), he has a very resilient and handsome new body with spiritual energy of some kind flowing through him, and a very clearly magical sword. Plus lots of neat starter powers! Though it feels like he has other abilities that have been blocked somehow? Probably he has to level up in order to access them.
When he treks out of his "base" and finds what seems to be a distressed maiden, he takes it for his beginner hero mission. The girl claims that she's been doomed to be sacrificed to an evil god. That sounds a little above Shen Yuan's pay grade for dealing with, so he unties her and decides that they had better just get out of the whole region altogether. He already packed up anything useful from his base, anticipating he might get caught up in an adventure once he left, so they follow the river away from the settlement until they reach another one.
While they travel, Luo Binghe tells Shen Yuan about the cursed deity, Shen Qingqiu, who was cast out of the heavens for slaughtering one of his brethren and has apparently being do-who-knows what to maidens from the local village in exchange for his "protection" ever since. Sounds like a real asshole! And also mid-level boss type bad guy at least. Shen Yuan hopes he doesn't have to fight him, but he probably will.
Thank goodness he found Binghe, though! Clearly the helpful little sister type! He's definitely going to require her assistance if he's going to figure out how to navigate this world and level up his skills enough to take on a god.
2K notes
·
View notes
Lex is Vlad reincarnated
So! Lex Luther, the greatest person to ever exist, had recently made a discovery.
A few weeks ago, a Cult of moronic simpletons had managed to kidnap him. Him! All for some stupid Demonic ritual where they sacrifice the wealthiest man they could find in return for something meaningless like "No More Poverty" or "No More Starvation".
He had survived, of course, and was unfortunately save by Supermoron.
But before the Man of Steel had busted in, he overheard something from the Cultists. Apparently they had chosen him for more than just his wealth, there was something more about his Soul that they were after. It felt "Divine", as if he had the soul of a God stuffed in a Mortal's body.
And obviously it must be correct. He was already the most intelligent man in the world, One of the wealthiest, and held more political power than any single man on the planet, so of course "God in disguise" was the next logical addition to that List.
Over the next few weeks he studied and prepared.
He needed to make sure that his efforts would be rewarded, that those Cultists had been correct about him despite their idiocy.
After buying up as many Magical Artifacts as he could related to Identity and Soul, he tested himself on Each and Every One. And Lo and Behold, he is truly a God.
Well, the Reincarnation of One. Apparently this was common in immortal beings such as himself, reincarnating themselves into mortal bodies as a sort of Vacation from their Duties. All he needed to do now was find a way to regain his Memories and Power without dying, and he would truly become a God On Earth.
A few more weeks of Preparation, and he was ready.
Apparently the Manchild of Steel had caught onto his plan in that time. His Ego probably couldn't bear another God living in the same City as himself, so he tried to stop Lex's plans of Ascension. Thankfully, in his research he had discovered his Rival's vulnerability to Magical Attacks, and set up countermeasures for him and his Breakfast Club should they attempt to interfere.
He stepped into the Ritual Circle, and began his Ascension to Godhood.
Try as they might, the League could not foil his plans this time. The Ritual Circle lit up with a sickly green light, and expanded to cover his entire body. The Ritual began to finally complete itself.
He had Won.
...
Oh.
...
Vlad stood at the center of the circle for a few moments. He took in all his Memories of his most recent Life, and Facepalmed so hard he was sure The Badger heard it back in the Realms.
Ten Tousand Years of Therapy specifically to curb his egotistical tendencies, and That is how he decides to spend his most recent Life? Acting as a Billionare Supervillain attacking a well meaning Hero for nothing less than Ego?! He even Cloned them!? Had he learned NOTHING!?!?
"Careful Team, we don't know how powerful he is now." He heard his current Nemesis say.
Oh right...they were still there.
He didn't really feel like explaining everything to them, and he technically still had about 40 years left on his Vacation...
He simply turned his back to them, flew back to his Mansion, turned back into his Human Form, and set about his Day. Maybe he could right a few of the wrongs he had done on this life?
It would certainly throw his current Nemesis for a loop. And while he may not Hate him anymore, he definitely still liked to Mess with him.
Maybe this would be more entertaining than he thought?
1K notes
·
View notes
Fictional universe: And there was this COMPANY,,,,
Me: Oh they did some messed up shit didn’t they
EDIT: anyone who says “also in real life!!” or smth like that just know it’s been done 700 times.
6K notes
·
View notes
Sometimes I think about Zuko being the Firelord and I just giggle like yeah it is an angsty situation, yes it’s got great fanfic material but guys your just going to give a 17 year old a whole country. Like not even a normal trained from birth Prince you’ve got a guy that was officially the Crown Prince for like 3 years and then he was out at sea causing problems. His special skills include hunting the avatar, B&E, being buddies with mythical beasts, prison breaks and customer service and you gave him the ultimate power to do whatever he wants. Not to mention he’s got friends who are just as insane and feral and he’s got all the money. Toph and Sokka are going to talk him into the most insane purchases in seconds. Guys c’mon.
3K notes
·
View notes
Imagine, if you will, Respawn ending up in the least important town in all of Illinois hoping to lay low for a while whilst planning to completely wreck Damian’s shit only to get shot at by some rogue government agents, kill said government agents, accidentally out some meta kid to the entire town while he tries to keep him from killing more government agents (who have not stopped shooting at either of them), save him by coincidence while making his escape, and having to flee the state with said weird metahuman kid (he’s like the third person to ever treat him like an actual human so he decided not to leave him behind) on the world’s third-worst roadtrip in order to rock up to Batman’s actual house to convince him to clear their names and get rid of the anti-ecto acts, with his only point of bartering being him pinky promising that he’ll definitely stop trying to kill Damian this time
And all of this happens over the course of like three days
590 notes
·
View notes