#and can't go 5 seconds without comparing them

[mrkvhs]

jill valentine from resident evil 5 and vanny/vanessa from fnaf . do you see my vision

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Murder, Love, and Destiny: An Eridan Ampora Character Study

Warnings for things from Homestuck, like discussions of child abuse, mental illness, murder, suicide, etc. etc.

Because there's a huge wall of text after this point, I'm going to summarize what I hope to convince you of in bullet point format, and then hope you'll actually read the rest of the text before arguing with me about it.

Eridan is the least casteist highblood, if you ignore all the slurs.

Those are his emotional support slurs.

Pale EriKar was not only canon, but set up to be endgame.

Eridan is incredibly plot-relevant, thematically relevant, and was definitely originally intended to be brought back to life, alongside the other dead trolls.

He's Sad.

The first thing we have to establish is what counts as "canon" for the purpose of this essay. I am only counting the original comic up to Game Over, after which there's a general consensus that Hussie kind of gave up on his original planned ending, and slapped together something that most people hate. So I am immediately disqualifying Pesterquest, supplementary material, fanworks deemed canon, the epilogues, and Homestuck^2.

Moreover, we are taking Hussie's commentaries with a grain of salt, for two reasons. The first reason is that I firmly believe - and will be arguing - that the original plan was to bring Eridan (and the other dead trolls) back; therefore, Hussie (who has a track record of playing coy with future plot twists) can't speak too fondly of him, lest he give it away. The second reason for de-emphasizing Hussie's words is that, post-retcon, Hussie isn't very well going to say that he had plans for a better ending, and then didn't execute on them; to save face, he has to act as though his trashing of several prior plot threads, including but not limited to Eridan, was the plan all along.

Therefore, this essay will not be putting too much emphasis on Word of God, and will instead be relying on textual evidence from the comic itself, of which there is plenty. So without further ado:

Eridan is a Consummate Murderer.

The reason I'm starting with this point is that, far more than any other, this truth lies at the core of his being. Eridan is formally introduced to us with a murder, and he's haunted by an overpowering genocide complex. He outright describes to Rose at one point that "killin is all i evver done practically," and uses "murder" as an expletive (ie "swweet stinkin murder"). With a conservative estimate of 5 kills per week for 4 sweeps (Vriska looks VERY young when she has to start killing, and Eridan was likely a similar age when he began), both Eridan and Vriska easily have bodycounts above 2000 - the real number is probably even higher.

At this point, many raise an objection that Eridan is only killing lusii, but I believe we need to count his kills as troll murders, for three reasons: first, a dead lusus results in the orphaned troll being culled; second, one has to assume he has had cases of trolls trying to defend their lusii, or coming after him for vengeance; and third - and most importantly - Eridan HIMSELF is thinking about the orphaned trolls.

Compare Feferi: Go Home:

That should keep her happy for a while. At least until she dies.

To Eridan: Go Home:

That should keep her happy for a while. And make a freshly orphaned troll somewhere very sad.

So Eridan, to a much greater extent than even Feferi, is thinking about the orphaned trolls he's leaving behind, and considers his own actions to be murder.

Now that we've established the facts regarding his murders - a rough bodycount, and the fact that, by his own admission, he barely had any hobbies outside of it - we can move on to the effect that it's had on him. It's not very good!

Vriska's manipul8tions and murders had to be done for her own sake - if she ever stopped, she died. Therefore, much of Vriska's personality revolves around justifying her own actions so she doesn't have to reckon with her softer feelings, like guilt or kindness - which she expresses would be viewed as scandalous by others of her caste.

But if Eridan ever stops feeding Gl'bgolyb, everybody dies. The stakes he has riding on his shoulders are, at all times, the fate of all trolls, including all his friends. Given Dualscar's title was "Orphaner," it's implied that killing lusii for Gl'bgolyb has always been a violet blood's duty, and is seen as such by the others, which is why nobody expresses gratitude for his hard work even a single time.

Which brings us to our next point:

Eridan is Crushed by Anxiety.

If Eridan stops killing lusii, everybody - especially his friends, but everybody else, too - dies.

If Eridan ever shows guilt or kindness, he'll be considered "weak" by the standards of highbloods - he shares this with Vriska.

Eridan is expected, by aristocratic tradition, to take on the mantle of his ancestor Dualscar and finish his work. Dualscar met a comedically cringefail end, so this is a massive undertaking.

Before finding out that god tiering is an option - so, for nearly his entire life - Eridan has had to live with the expectation that he will outlive all of his friends. The lowbloods from culling or dying on the battlefield, the highbloods from old age, and Feferi from being killed by the Empress when she gets old enough.

(This is reflected in who he talks to the most - Feferi, who's the only one with a natural lifespan longer than his, Vriska, who's a highblood, Kanaya, who's practically guaranteed to survive into adulthood, and Karkat, whose anonblood allows Eridan to give him the benefit of the doubt.)

Also if he can't land his concupiscent quadrants he'll die from that too, but that seems pretty secondary to the rest of his concerns.

He can't even make friends with the other highbloods, because sea dwellers are expected to hate and antagonize them.

He had a free ticket into adulthood, but would almost certainly be expected to join the army and serve as a commander. That is to say, his fate of performing the role of a vicious, murderous sea dweller seems dreadfully inevitable to him.

NO WONDER he can't stop having emotional breakdowns. NO WONDER his chatlogs swing wildly from relentless self-aggrandizement to traumadumping. NO WONDER he's obsessed with murder and death and genocide.

Doc Scratch calls him a "vengeful boy on the path of nihilism," and it's not hard to see why: Eridan's entire life has been about living up to the role imposed on him by society, sacrificing his own time and sanity for everyone else, which he "nevver got any appreciation for anywway." And all he had to look forward to was more of the same, all his friends dropping dead one by one before him. For Eridan, there has never been any hope.

SGRUB could have been a way out for him, but a combination of his own terrible choices, spurred on by his anxieties, and his teammates' unwillingness to knock some sense into him, meant that he only wound up mired even deeper in his hopelessness.

We all know about how Eridan wouldn't stop killing the angels on his planet, provoking their aggression and turning it into a ball of death. How he was definitely not supposed to be doing this, and how his stubborn insistence on it led to his further ostracization from the rest of the group. The thing is, when we look at his angel-murders from the point of view that Eridan's entire life has been about murdering things or else Something Bad™ happens, it actually starts to become... kind of sad.

KARKAT: BETWEEN A TRIGGERHAPPY PRINCE WITH A GOD WEAPON BLASTING ANYTHING THAT TWITCHED AND A MILLION CRAZED ANGELS HE DELIBERATELY ENRAGED, IT WASN'T WHAT I'D CALL AN IDEAL SOCIAL HUB. KARKAT: IF YOU WERE LONELY WHY DIDN'T YOU VENTURE OUT MORE OFTEN? ERIDAN: wwell i wwoulda but nobody else wwas vvolunteerin to pick up the slack on angel killin duties

Killing the angels is something he feels like his has to do, because his entire life has been about killing things he doesn't want to kill. He's unable to break out of that mindset on his own, and his unpleasant personality has scared off anyone who might want to help. No one on the team tries to understand his thought process on a deeper level, not even Karkat, who just tells him it was an idiotic thing to do without addressing his underlying anxieties at all. Indeed, "nobody understands."

And this is really the root of why I think so many people get the wrong read on Eridan - Eridan is constantly contradicting himself, constantly denying his own feelings, constantly pushing an image that he doesn't actually believe in, and constantly insisting that he's fine with all the horrible shit in his life - that he likes it, even. After all, he can't admit to his guilt for his murders, or how much he doesn't want to watch his friends die, or how scared he is about the future - that'd be weakness!

CC: I can't look after you anymore. CA: I DIDNT EVER NEED ANYONE TO LOOK AFTER ME CA: i was totally fuckin fine my ambitions were noble

You see his contradictory nature with his stated love of history, which he only ever offhandedly mentions - because he's not actually that interested in history, it's just something that's expected of someone of his station. And you see it with his wavy accent, which he himself calls "weird" and drops when he's trying to be emotionally sincere. And you see it with his dumbass outfit, which is very clearly an imitation of Dualscar (with the only exception being the wizard-ass scarf, because wizards are his actual interest. I don't believe he likes fashion. I genuinely believe - and Eridan himself says so - that he basically has no hobbies outside of murder).

Even being proud to be a sea dweller is pretty much an outright lie:

CC: You can't )(ave t)(e sort of affinity for "our kind" t)(at you profess if you've only spent, w)(at... CC: A few days underwater, maybe? IN YOUR W)(OL-E LIF-E!

One that he tells because he's SCARED OF THE OCEAN. Because he knows what lives in the ocean, because he's been feeding it his entire life. I see a lot of people who give Eridan an interest in marine life, and I'm telling you, that's just got no basis in canon. He's fucking TERRIFIED of the sea.

And for that matter, land dweller genocide. Eridan doesn't want to do it. Both Feferi AND his internal narration call him out for not actually wanting to do it. He outright states he wouldn't kill his friends.

CA: wwell CA: im not goin to vvery wwell kill you am i that wwould be fuckin unconscionable CA: wwhat kind of friend wwould i be

But he feels like he HAS to want it, HAS to believe in it, HAS to be talking about it constantly, because that's what's expected from him as a sea dweller, and a sea dweller is ALL that he will get to be. The mutation that puts a violet streak in his hair is damning. It's a fate he feels like he can't escape. Which brings us to:

Eridan is Not Actually Casteist, Well He Is But Not Like That, It's Complicated

Secondary title: Those Are His Emotional Support Slurs, Okay

In the exact same vein (haha) as secretly not wanting all the land dwellers dead, Eridan also genuinely doesn't feel like he's better than lower blood castes. Vriska and Equius obviously put quite a bit of stock into being nobility, and both have acted superior to Karkat for it. Feferi actually revels in her high status, and while she is genuinely well-meaning, she's not as interested in abolishing casteism as she is in changing the meaning of "culling" specifically (the hemocaste, aristocracy, and casteism still very much exist in a Beforus under her rule). Gamzee MIGHT be the only highblood less casteist than Eridan, but then again, as soon as he snaps, he does say a lot of casteist stuff to Equius, although it's unclear how serious he is, and he also proceeds to get really into his weird highblood clown cult.

Meanwhile, Eridan - despite all his slurs and talk of genocide - does not actually try to "pull rank" on a lowblood for being a lower caste than him with a single exception. That exception is Sollux... after he's already shown having entirely caste-neutral opinions on Sollux:

CC: But Sollux finally came t)(roug)(, and now I believe t)(e full c)(ain is complete! CA: man that guy CA: hes a fuckin drama machine it is fuckin pathetic CC: YOUR STUPID FIS)(Y FAC-E IS T)(-E DRAMA MAC)(IN-E T)(AT DO-ES NOT)(ING BUT W)(IN-E AND GLUB. CC: 38P CA: fuck SORRY CC: Anyway you s)(ouldn't say t)(at about )(im, )(e is a )(ero and )(e saved my life. CA: yeah sorry

CA: my feelins seem petty and meaninless noww CA: she had better things to wworry about than my ovverwwrought bullshit CA: like the dead guy wwho savved her CA: so forget it thanks anywway

It's only AFTER he's mad at Sollux for dating Feferi that he starts going in on Sollux with casteist rhetoric... which is treated as unrequited flirting and not serious casteism:

ERIDAN: hey finless this doesnt concern those wwith mustard sludge slippin through their vveins ERIDAN: its a matter for royalty only ERIDAN: so keep your mouth closed or ill slit you open ovver my next meal SOLLUX: w/e bro, not iintere2ted. FEFERI: -Eridan, please! I don't want to see any more dueling. FEFERI: Don't try to provoke )(im. It's not like I don't know w)(at you're doing! You keep trying to spark a rivalry wit)( )(im to get me to auspisticize between you two, and pull us out of our quadrant! FEFERI: It is t)(e oldest and lamest trick in t)(e book. It didn't work t)(en and it won't work now!

THEY don't even think he's being casteist.

In fact, directly contradicting this earlier argument he has with Feferi:

CC: T)(is is t)(e last time I will say t)(is. CC: W-E AR-E NOT B-ETT-ER T)(AN ANYBODY!!!!! CC: GLUB. >38( CA: pshh CA: hemospectrum begs to differ

He OUTRIGHT states his real feelings here:

CA: im the biggest fuckin idiot who ever lived CA: i cant BELIEVE i just opened up to you like a chump when i knew what was comin CA: i am one sad fuckin brinesucker CA: overemotional sappy trash youre right im not better than anybody CA: im worse than anybody CA: EVERYBODY CA: all the bodies

So the question of "is Eridan casteist" has an answer of "kind of, but also no." Eridan DOES espouse the rhetoric; he's constantly saying stuff that a casteist sea dweller "should" be saying. However, if you look at his ACTIONS, and the way he actually treats people, he doesn't actually care about blood color. He'll hit on anybody, and he's rude as fuck to everybody. The real problem with him is that he's terrible to talk to, not that he's discriminatory.

That's the thing about Eridan. Understanding him means looking past the way he presents himself, the lies he tells to himself, and even, at times, the way the narration presents him. His "overblown emotional theatrics" seem a lot less overblown when his problems ARE so real, deep-seated, and constantly causing him an unimaginable amount of anguish.

The problem is, the main people he has to bounce those problems against are Feferi, Vriska, and Kanaya, three of the people most comfortable with their privileged positions, for whom Eridan's genuine emotional distress seems like needless melodrama. Feferi loves being a princess, Vriska enjoys her noble privileges, Kanaya doesn't need to worry about culling. But for Eridan, his noble status, and the duties and expectations placed on him for it, have caused him nothing but pain - of course he would feel like nobody understands. Most of his closest friends genuinely don't, nor do they try to.

Because that's what he is at his core - a traumatized fucking child, who doesn't see any way out. Eridan is not a casteist genocidal sea dweller... he just wishes he was one, and tries to be one, because if he actually was one, he wouldn't feel so awful and scared and sad all the time. He'd be normal, like his friends.

The reason he constantly spouts anti-land dweller rhetoric and uses casteist language is to assuage this cognitive dissonance. That's why he has to come off so strong, present himself in such an aggrandized way, act like such a douchebag. They're his emotional support slurs. He doesn't actually believe what he says, which means he's a Bad Sea Dweller, which means he's Failing, which means Something Bad Will Happen, so he'd better get his ass in line and say something casteist!

And it's all made worse because:

Eridan is Dumb of Ass (and True of Word)

Oh my god you guys he's so stupid that it hurts.

Okay, that's not entirely fair. Eridan is clearly well-educated and book smart; he has some of the most elegant prose out of the trolls, and he's prone to going off on insane rants with it. (Actually, his language gets more flowery and showy when he's trying to impress a stranger, and gets progressively more laid back, chill, and even kind of "bro"-y when he starts talking to people he doesn't feel like he needs to impress.)

CA: at this point i find all her adorable black pixie dabblins to be prime kiddie playtime shit CA: all of her FRAUDULENT MAGICS cannot come close to posin threat to my mastery ovver the TRUEST SCIENCES CA: an wwith my empiricists wwand i servve as the righteous hope that wwill incinerate delusion and the deluded alike CA: my holy fire is the wwhite fury bled from the wwrath-wweary eyes of fifty thousand nonfictional angels CA: and wwhen theyre finished wweepin they wwill boww before their prince GG: wow what are you talking about

What I mean is this: his brain is so full of anxiety and cognitive dissonance and murder and death that he struggles to care about other people, which has devastating effects on his social skills. I go really in-depth on how his though process informs his behavior here. The question may have popped up in your mind already: if his casteism stuff isn't actually real, then what is Eridan actually like? The answer is, overwhelmingly, and discomfortingly, SINCERE.

This boy is gunning at 100% emotional earnestness 100% of the time, and it's deeply uncomfortable for others to deal with. He'll swing wildly from insults and derogatory language, to stating a desire to kill all land dwellers, to awe and amazement at his friends' prowess, to demanding that they do things for him, to traumadumping and venting, without missing a beat. Often in the same conversation.

CA: kan its hard GA: What CA: being a kid and growwing up CA: its hard and nobody understands

He's also specifically terrible at parsing hostility. Functionally, he interprets all hostility aimed AT him as either pitch/ashen flirting or "ironic repartee," and similarly views his own hostile words as verbal jousting, pitch/ashen advances, or even just factual descriptions of the world around him (ie calling Nepeta a "kittycat shipper cavve girl"). Hostility and aggression are just kind of his baseline, default state of being, and he basically has no ability to differentiate between good and bad attention. I talk more in-depth about his emotionally bereft upbringing (and shitty lusus) here, but suffice to say that our boy isn't getting any emotional support at home, and as a result, craves attention, no matter what kind.

This also means he's insanely gullible. For example, Rose calls him an idiot to his face, and then blows up his computer, sarcastically calling it "your first lesson in showmanship." Eridan proceeds to literally considers it that, blowing up Jade's computer after he's done talking to her. Furthermore, Kanaya sees him as a burden, insults him to his face, and pretty much just bullies him along with Rose for fun.

So she trains Eridan to become a powerful white wizard of hope to challenge her, as a joke.

And yet, in spite of all that, Eridan still has nothing but gratitude and praise for Kanaya:

ERIDAN: kan i been meanin to thank you KANAYA: For What ERIDAN: for all that trainin you did ERIDAN: i wwouldnt be the incredible holy wwizard i am noww wwithout your help KANAYA: But I Didnt Even Really Train You I Just Made You A Wand ERIDAN: yeah wwell thats all i needed i guess ERIDAN: i just needed for someone to showw a little faith in me so im sayin thanks i owwe ya KANAYA: Okay Then Youre Welcome KANAYA: I Hope You Use Your Magnificent Powers Of Light And Hope For Goodness And Purity And Lets Not Forget Science ERIDAN: dont wworry im all ovver that shit you dont evven knoww KANAYA: Uh Oh I Hope That Didnt Come Off As Too Sarcastic ERIDAN: wwhat KANAYA: The Thing I Just Said KANAYA: I Didnt Even Realize How Sarcastic I Was Being Its Starting To Become A Problem I Think KANAYA: Please Dont Take Too Much Offense ERIDAN: haha damn kan if thats your idea of offense bein made then i honestly gotta fuckin wworry for you ERIDAN: tell you wwhat ill givve you some lessons in dealin out the dark umbrage to repay you for your tutelage in the wwhite science

Like, he's in the middle of genuinely thanking her for believing in him, she makes fun of him to his face, and his response is to laugh it off and offer to teach her how to properly insult someone. It's honestly... kind of sad. Not that he doesn't deserve the ridicule, but what we're seeing here is a traumatized, emotionally neglected boy trying to communicate the best that he can that he loves and appreciates his friends, and receiving nothing but mockery in return.

It's really not a surprise, then, that he goes off the deep end. His entire life prior to the game has been shit; he got broken up with as soon as he entered the game (by someone who didn't even care enough not to use fish puns while doing it); he's ostracized and avoided for the game's duration; and then he spends the rest of his time on the meteor being bullied. He feels deeply hopeless and anxious about their situation because he literally doesn't know how else to exist, and his concerns are dismissed and mocked at every turn. When Feferi turns on him with intent to kill, that's his breaking point.

I see a lot of people say he goes grimdark, or succumbs to external influence somehow, but I don't think that needs to be true (nor is it) - he's just a deeply traumatized kid with almost no support network who's finally been pushed to the edge, despite displaying every possible warning sign and making multiple cries for help. Yes, ultimately, he's guilty for his own actions, but his killing spree - alongside Gamzee's and Vriska's - represents a cohesive failure as a team to address very clear problems in their midst.

So Feferi and Kanaya are sick of his ass. Sollux hates him platonically, Equius doesn't like him, and Nepeta thinks of him as a creep. Vriska is his awkward ex, and Terezi agrees with him when he calls himself pathetic. He never interacts with Tavros, Aradia, or sober!Gamzee. Is there anyone that treats him nicely?

Uh, okay, so I swear this isn't shipping goggles -

Pale EriKar Is Canon And I Can Prove It

So, I'm going to start this with a disclaimer: you can ship what you want to ship. I don't mind. I don't care. Headcanons are valid, death of the author, etc. What you do in your free time is up to you.

What I am attempting to argue in this section is that an Eridan/Karkat moirallegiance was heavily foreshadowed, one of the most heavily foreshadowed things in the entire comic, and - assuming that the original ending of Homestuck included all the dead trolls being brought back and redeemed - was going to be endgame. There's a torrential amount of evidence pointing to this, and very little of it is acknowledged even by the EriKar shippers, which is a shame.

At the very least, I'll be happy if I can convince some Karkat RPers to be extra nice to Eridans, because they are actually just friends who care deeply about each other. Canonically.

The first thing to note is that Eridan and Karkat, at least prior to SGRUB, talk all the time, to the point where Feferi feels the need to comment on it:

CC: You know, I'm not sure w)(y we never talk about our romantic aspirations. CC: We s)(ould more often. It is kind of -EXCITING! CA: shrug CC: Probably because you fill your gossip quota wit)( your nubby )(orned bro. CC: You leave not)(ing left to talk about wit)( your dear sweet moirail! CC: We are supposed to )(elp eac)( ot)(er wit)( t)(at stuff too, remember. CA: maybe CA: seems kinda CA: odd though

("Can you please stop having an emotional affair with Karkat" "Eh, I'll think about it")

The second thing to note is what the contents of those conversations entail. Sure, they "gossip," but it goes deeper than that, because they gossip about things that Karkat would NEVER gossip about with anybody else, because Karkat usually respects his "VERY GOOD FRIEND"s. For example, here Eridan mentions that Karkat has speculated on Kanaya's love life with him:

CA: you dont wwant to be our auspistice cause you dont wwant to get locked into that sort of relation wwith her i can respect that GA: No Thats Not It CA: yeah it is your real feelins run pretty awwful RUDDY methinks evverybody knowws it CA: especially that assblood karkat he and me havve you so pegged about that its upright silly

And it's not even a one-off thing, because here Karkat is again, mentioning Nepeta's crush on him:

KARKAT: OK, BUT TO BE FAIR, I'M PRETTY SURE SHE'S STILL OBSESSED WITH ME. KARKAT: IT'S A VERY UNFORTUNATE, VERY RED AND VERY UNREQUITED SITUATION I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TIPTOE AROUND FOR A LONG TIME, OK? KARKAT: HER DISINTEREST IN YOUR ADVANCE WASN'T A REFLECTION ON YOU AT ALL. KARKAT: COME ON, WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.

It's a situation he's been trying to "tiptoe around for a long time," and he tells ERIDAN, of all people? MULTIPLE TIMES? (AND HE ALSO TELLS ERIDAN THAT THE REJECTION WASN'T HIS FAULT???? WHAT??????)

So we've established that they talk frequently and about some pretty seriously sensitive topics. But did you know that they also talk about... their feelings?

See, the thing is, Karkat has always been weirdly nice to Eridan. Here he is in a memo near the very beginning of their game, when Karkat is at his most "rah rah, I'm the big bad leader":

FCA: i got a problem FCA: wwith feferi FCA: and im really kinda sittin here in bad shape about it emotionally speakin CCG: OK, WELL CCG: I GET THAT, I HEAR YOU BRO CCG: BUT THIS IS STILL NOT THE RIGHT PLACE FOR THIS SO I'VE GOT TO BAN YOU. CCG banned FCA from responding to memo. CCG: BUT SERIOUSLY JUST GET IN TOUCH WITH ME IN PRIVATE ABOUT IT, OK MAN? CCG: WE'LL GET YOUR SHIT STRAIGHTENED OUT.

Compare that to Tavros asking for advice later down in the same memo:

PAT: sINCE i DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU ARE NOW, bUT MAYBE HELP ME, PAT: aBOUT A THING THAT HAS TO DO WITH A GIRL, PAT: lIKE, PAT: a ROMANCE THING, yOU MIGHT KNOW ABOUT, CCG: YOU PEOPLE ARE IMBECILES. CCG: ALL OF YOU. CCG: I AM NOT POSTING THESE MEMOS TO COUNSEL YOU ON YOUR PAST AND FUTURE DATING PROBLEMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CCG: WHY ARE YOU ALL SUCH BASKET CASES. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY ANYMORE. PAT: sORRY, CCG: SHOULD I BAN YOU? WHAT'S EVEN THE POINT ANYMORE! ONE OF YOU STOOGES WILL BE RIGHT ON THE LAST ONES HEELS WITH ANOTHER SOB STORY. CCG: JUST CCG: HURRY UP AND TELL ME WHAT YOUR PROBLEM IS BRO.

He then proceeds to dispense no actual love advice; he just points out that Vriska can totally read this memo too, and then mocks them both when she shows up - thus making it clear that he is giving Eridan special treatment.

You see it again in his discussion with Eridan in [S] Kanaya: Return to the Core, where Eridan invokes a "pact" between them, and Karkat immediately plays nice with him, despite himself being extremely high-strung and stressed out:

KARKAT: RIGHT, IT'S POWERED BY SCIENCE, I FORGOT. KARKAT: OR HOPE. WHATEVER THE FUCK THAT MEANS. ERIDAN: i dont fuckin need this from you i take enough shit as it is from the rest a you dirtscrapers i thought you and me had a kinda pact or wwhatevver KARKAT: OK FINE, SHUT UP, I APOLOGIZE. I KNOW IT'S TOUGH BEING YOU.

That's definitely pity, which Karkat states to be the basis of all relationships besides pitch. But, sure, okay, Karkat is sometimes nice to his friends. He is, after all, the Friendship Troll, so that's not necessarily out of the ordinary. But how about the fact that it goes both ways?

That's right, Eridan "100% aggro 100% of the time" Ampora is actually really considerate toward Karkat's feelings, and basically nobody else's. Upon hearing that Karkat is distressed that Sollux has died, Eridan actively puts his own meltdown about his breakup with Feferi on pause:

TC: BeCaUsE OuR GoOd bRo sOlLuX JuSt kIcKeD ThE WiCkEd mOtHeRfUcKiN ShIt CA: wwhat the fuck do you mean by that CA: are you sayin hes dead TC: YeAh :o( CA: oh fuck CA: oh god fuck noww i feel like an asshole

He then goes on to chastise Gamzee for his shitty advice, demanding to be given the chance to comfort Karkat himself instead:

TC: BuT I ToLd hIm tO Be cHiLl TC: BeCaUsE ThErE Is a mIrAcLe cOmInG, i cAn fEeL It CA: that is the wworst fuckin advvice CA: wwhat an awwful thing a you to say CA: MAGIC ISNT REAL STUPID STOP BELIEVVIN IN IT TC: i'Ve gOt tO BeLiEvE At wHaT My hEaRt tElLs iN Me, EvEn iF It's a fAkE ThInG TC: HoNk CA: this is a lot a pointless fuckin rubbish and isnt no emotional help to him or me either for that matter CA: put kar on

Before finally giving up when Gamzee insists he's "too scared of Jack" to help, drinking some Faygo, and trying to ask past Karkat for help, because past Karkat isn't sad yet about Sollux dying. So, to recap,

Eridan's first instinct when in emotional duress is to go to Karkat.

Eridan feels like he knows Karkat well enough to know that Gamzee's advice would be useless (and is proven right by the fact that Gamzee and Karkat's moirallegiance fails for similar reasons).

Eridan is willing to shelve his own emotional meltdown for Karkat's sake.

Eridan demands to be the one to provide Karkat with emotional support.

And this is, again, not a one-off thing. In the memo Karkat opens right after Eridan and Gamzee have both turned murderous, after he's spent several minutes making death threats toward Eridan and insulting him directly, he goes:

CCG: I'M SO UPSET, I'M JUST COMPLETELY FREAKING OUT IN EVERY WAY POSSIBLE. PCA: yeah i knoww wwhat its like you wwanna talk about it

Eridan spends this entire memo under the belief that it's a completely run-of-the-mill conversation they're having:

PCA: i mean yeah obvviously i kneww you wwerent serious PCA: i guess i appreciate the effort youre puttin into cheerin me up PCA: i can alwways count on you for some good ironic repartee kar nobody else really gets our sense a humor CCG: UGH, NO PCA: are you busy PCA: you said youd try to make it to lowwaa soon wwell howw about it

Which implies that offering to listen to Karkat's feelings is also a completely regular thing for them.

But something magical is ALSO happening within this last memo, and to really explain it, I'll first have to be a little mean to the GamKar shippers (sorry).

So, canonically, GamKar doesn't work out for them, despite also being somewhat foreshadowed. In fact, they feature on Nepeta's shipping wall, which is actually, in my opinion, foreshadowing that it WOULDN'T work out. (Nepeta's ships being wrong, and shipping being something she needs to learn to outgrow, is a whole essay on its own, that I'm not getting into here.)

But the thing is, the seeds for them not working out were also planted in the first - and only - real post-moirallegiance interaction that they have with each other, where Gamzee tries to calm Karkat down... and FAILS:

GAMZEE: naw brother, i was just about to all say for you to try and get your settle down on, maybe. GAMZEE: :o( ... KARKAT: OK KARKAT: OK YEAH KARKAT: I GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT. KARKAT: NO, YOU'RE RIGHT, I SHOULD RELAX. KARKAT: AND BREATHE. KARKAT: I MEAN, WHAT ARE MOIRAILS FOR, RIGHT? KARKAT: THIS IS HOW IT WORKS, I STOP YOU FROM KILLING EVERYBODY, THEN YOU RETURN THE FAVOR AND CALM ME DOWN AND I JUST KARKAT: BREATHE KARKAT: LIKE KARKAT: THIS... KARKAT: SNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK, THAT SUN IS BRIGHT. KARKAT: CALL ME CRAZY, BUT IT'S KIND OF HARD TO RELAX WITHIN A STONE'S THROW FROM, OH, I GUESS ONLY THE BIGGEST FUCKING STAR ANY MORTAL HAS EVER LAID EYES ON. ... KARKAT: BUT I MEAN, CAN THIS BE HEALTHY? KARKAT: AREN'T WE GOING TO GET BURNED OR HAVE OUR RETINAS SCORCHED BY LOOKING AT IT? KARKAT: OH GOD I THINK I'M HAVING A PANIC ATTACK.

But let's go back to that memo where Karkat is freaking out in every way possible. This is how he starts that memo - so upset about the deaths of his friends and terrified by Gamzee that he can barely string together a coherent thought:

CCG: WE ARE SO SCREWED. CCG: OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FUCK. CCG: GUYS, I AM TERRIFIED, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. CCG: I'M IN A ROOM FULL OF BODIES, AND I THINK I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO TURN MY BACK ON THEM? CCG: OH MY GOD, I JUST HEARD A HONK. ... CCG: FEFERI, I'M SORRY. CCG: IT WAS MY FAULT, I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. PCC: Sorry for w)(at?? CCG: FOR CCG: I CCG: I CAN'T DO THIS CCG: IT'S TOO MUCH FOR ME, I'M SORRY.

In fact, he's so distressed that he bans Past!Feferi and Past!Gamzee almost immediately after they come in. But then Eridan comes in, and... I mean, first of all, just compare how long it takes for him to ban Eridan:

But more interesting are the contents of their conversation. Over the course of talking to Eridan... Karkat completely calms the fuck down. Like he's entirely forgotten that he's shitting his pants with fear. In fact, he even starts critiquing Eridan for his dumbassery:

PCA: evven if i wwasnt compelled to think you wwere still bein flippant and ironic wwith me you cant exactly outright reject me can you CCG: WHY NOT PCA: cause youre future you PCA: doesnt count unless its present you til then its all fair game CCG: IS THIS REAL, ARE YOU BEING IRONIC OR SOMETHING, I CAN'T EVEN TELL ANYMORE CCG: THE PROBLEM IS, I CAN'T PUT THIS SORT OF BEHAVIOR PAST YOU AT ALL, SO I DON'T KNOW. ... CCG: YOU'RE KILLING ANGELS NOW, AREN'T YOU PCA: no CCG: YOU ARE KILLING FUCKING ANGELS, RIGHT NOW, IN THE PAST, WITH YOUR SHITTY GUN. I JUST KNOW IT. PCA: wwell uh PCA: therere just so damn many kar and theyre not gettin any less bloody pissed is the thing CCG: THIS IS WHY IT WOULD NEVER WORK BETWEEN US, MAN.

It's extremely funny. Over the course of talking to Eridan, he goes from:

CCG: OH GOD OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD CCG: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

To:

CCG banned PCA from responding to memo. CCG: ANYWAY CCG: THAT'S IT I GUESS.

Eridan isn't even trying to calm Karkat down. He still succeeds in doing so. This is because they are soul mates. And I mean that in the sense that the comic literally calls being moirails soul mates, which it doesn't do for the other quadrants:

A reasonable human translation would be the concept of a soul mate, but in a more platonic sense, and with a more specific social purpose.

That "social purpose" being that an even-tempered troll calms down a more hot-tempered one, and vice versa.

It also goes on to note:

But some pale pairings, as the one above [referring to a picture of Nepeta and Equius], will be strikingly obvious to all who know them.

But what's really interesting is the next page.

And yet others will seem to have been hatched for each other.

Did you catch that? Let me zoom in.

(Also, the blue and red cuttlefish to represent Sollux - Feferi and Sollux spend the whole game together, and even wind up talking about their feelings constantly in a pile - more on piles in a sec.)

In fact... in Eridan's first visual appearance...

The crab has always been there for him.

It's also important to talk about the bottle of Faygo that's been photoshopped to be candy red, Karkat's blood color. The path that it takes actually directly mirrors Karkat's relationships with Gamzee and Eridan - it's initially something that Gamzee has, but winds up being ejected out of his life, and washes up on Eridan's shore. In fact:

TC: SnAtCh aN IcEcOlD, dOg TC: MoThErFuCkIn cHuG ThAt sHiT LiKe yOu aNd tHe bOtTlE WaS ReUnItEd lOvErS CA: are you recommendin a bevverage to me or somethin CA: is that wwhat this is TC: YeAh mAn SlAm A FaYgO CA: i dont havve a fuckin faygo you stupid fuck wwhy wwould i keep that disgusting shit on hand TC: ArE YoU MoThErFuCkIn sUrE AbOuT ThAt? CA: oh CA: oh god youre right i do CA: i totally forgot about it TC: YoU SeE MaN TC: MoThEr TC: FuCkIn TC: MiRaClEs TC: :o)

When Gamzee and Eridan discuss this exact bottle, Gamzee even likens it to "reunited lovers"; it's something that Eridan has had this whole time (after all, he was cheating on Feferi with the guy), but never realized.

There are a few miscellaneous things that don't really mean anything on their own, but put next to all this other stuff, is worth considering, so I'll list those now.

First, they both do the bonk:

Second:

CG: ARE WE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE BECAUSE OF STUFF I SAID. TA: eheheheh you LIITERALLY a2k me that every tiime are you jokiing. TA: ii cant even tell anymore. CG: IT'S A JOKE MORON. CG: HONESTLY I'M JUST GLAD NOBODY ELSE IS PRIVVY TO OUR CONVERSATIONS.

Third, Karkat muses to his future self about how he misses his friends, especially the assholes, two pages before staring at a dead Eridan's ass (joking, he's definitely looking at WV, but it's still significant that this thought is being associated with Eridan):

CCG: I MEAN, DON'T GET ME WRONG. CCG: I MISS ALL OF MY DEAD FRIENDS A LOT. CCG: EVEN THE ASSHOLES! I MISS THEM TOO. MAYBE EVEN ESPECIALLY THEM, IN SOME PERVERSE WAY. CCG: AND I SHOULD BE RELIEVED THAT THEY ALL SEEM TO BE HAPPY IN SOME WAY, EVEN IF IT'S BY FLOATING NEBULOUSLY THROUGH DREAM PROJECTIONS WITH THEIR FREAKY BLANK EYES. CCG: AND I GUESS I AM RELIEVED ABOUT THAT. CCG: BUT AT THE SAME TIME IT'S LEFT ME UNSETTLED.

Fourth, in the same conversation, he bemoans his failed relationship with Terezi, before Future!Karkat chastises Past!Karkat for his instability and mixed signals. Going back to the page on moirallegiances, an explicit function of a proper pale relationship is stabilizing a troll's other relationships:

The two partners in a strong pale relationship will serve to balance and complement each other's emotional profiles, and thus allow their other relationships to be more successful.

Of course, I don't need to tell you how messy and unstable Eridan's relationships have been.

And finally, Piles of Stuff™ are associated with moirails, and directly stated in-comic to cause an outpouring of emotion:

Standing near this pile stirs powerful emotions. The closer you stand to piles of stuff, the more freely the feelings flow. It is a law of reality.

So here's a seven-word tragedy for you: For Sale, Shitty Wand Pile, Never Used:

ERIDAN: at least i got the upright basic decency to hide my shitty wand pile somewwhere in the lab you wwont find it dont evven bother lookin KARKAT: WHY DO YOU ASSHOLES HAVE PILES OF THINGS, JUST STOP.

(Which he specifically tells Karkat about.)

So, yeah, what I'm saying is, there's just, like, a weirdly large amount to read into here. That Karkat and Eridan are probably soulmates or whatever. And that this is important because...

Eridan Is Plot Relevant (Well All The Dead Trolls Are But This Is An Essay About Eridan)

So. Now we are going to talk about themes. Yes, like we are in schoolfeeding again. I'm going to keep it simple, because "The Themes of Homestuck" is a whole essay on its own, and this one about just the shitty fish boy is already way too long.

I think it's fairly non-controversial to posit that the main theme of Homestuck is, "children should mature, care about each other, and throw off the shackles of their old society, because they will be responsible for a new world one day."

Up until Game Over/the Retcon, this is so prevalent and well-established that SBURB/SGRUB's coming-of-age themes will outright be commented upon by the characters, and the main villain is a child who deliberately stunted his own growth so he could go around kicking over other peoples' toys forevermore.

So, the thing is, with that being the theme of Homestuck, if ALL of the Alternian trolls don't survive to the end, the ending is thematically unsatisfying, because the message suddenly gains an addendum of "well, some kids just need to die," which totally sucks. Like, sure, Eridan was a violent, crazed murderer even at the best of times, but his permanent death within the canon ending kind of means that the comic is saying that people in his position don't deserve kindness or second chances. That position being a traumatized, emotionally neglected child, who was being bullied by people he considered his friends. It's a pretty terrible message.

It's even worse when you consider what other trolls don't make it to the end - Nepeta, the most outspoken troll against the hemospectrum (and Davepeta does NOT count, don't try to tell me the final culmination of Nepeta's character arc is being combined with some guy she barely knows and a bird). Feferi, who genuinely wanted the best for others, even if she was kind of a privileged princess. Aradia and Sollux also stay behind in the bubbles, even though their lives have pretty much been endless parades of suffering and being used by other people. Even Equius doesn't deserve it - he was kind of a casteist freak, but not irredeemably so, and the fact that he became kinder to Karkat over the course of SGRUB proved that he had the capacity to change. And Tavros, allergic to himself and being insulted by Vriska, is a terrible way to end his arc.

It's also really clear that, since half his friends are dead, Karkat just doesn't really have anything to do. His title is the Knight of Blood, and Blood is about bonds - romance, friendship. And yet, he ends the comic having never figured out what Blood was about, with no confirmed filled quadrants (sorry DaveKat likers, but within the comic itself, DaveKat is never confirmed), and most of his bonds nothing more than ghosts in the bubbles. It's a terribly unsatisfying ending for the most narratively important troll.

I think, then, that even if you don't agree that Homestuck should have ended with full revivals and redemption arcs for all the trolls, the essay is going to proceed on like you do, so, sorry, I guess.

The thing with Eridan, specifically, is that he's actually tied deeply into the plot and themes, and his return means more than just Karkat finally getting a date (although that's important, too). Eridan is directly intertwined with a prophecy to kill Lord English; he's set up to mirror Caliborn and Calliope; and thematically, his redemption would be the most clear instance of the "interrogating society" part of the theme of Homestuck, because Eridan is kind of the Society Troll. And also, he was definitely supposed to be Roxy's wizard boyfriend.

Just gonna get that last one out of the way real quick because it's a fast one, Roxy fucking loves wizards and is a hipster. Eridan is a wizard and is also a hipster. Roxy has a crush on a prince. Eridan is also a prince. Roxy wears a purple striped scarf. Eridan wears a blue striped scarf. Roxy uses rifles. Eridan uses rifles. Momlonde's introduction includes a passive-aggressive fridge battle that features a cameo of Eridan's quirk.

Using the colorful MAGNET LETTERS, you recently left a succinct message, which may or may not have been directed toward anyone in particular. But you couldn't find the letter W, so you just stuck two V's together. Your mother then purchased a fresh pack of W's and left them there for your convenience.

Yeah. So. Uh. Not only did Eridan need to be brought back to date Karkat pale, but he also needed to be brought back to date Roxy flushed. Can you imagine how funny it would be. They'd get together within 5 minutes of meeting for the first time and Rose would lose her shit. Anyway.

Him being a parallel to Calliope and Caliborn is also a quick one - Caliborn uses Riflekind/Sceptrekind, and Calliope uses Pistolkind/Wandkind. Eridan's two weapons are rifles and wands. Lord English is described as an evil wizard and at one point is shown using Calliope's wand. Eridan is also an evil wizard who uses a wand.

Look, I'm not saying that Eridan is necessarily directly related to these two, nor am I even necessarily saying that he and Roxy HAVE to date, but I am saying that he's got Weird Plot Connections that make him bizarrely relevant to characters that only come into play well after his death - almost like the comic was setting up that he would be coming back. His reaction to Cronus supports this, which I go into detail about here.

There's other strange "Eridan's plot important" things, too - like the fact that he's completely unimpressed by Faygo, considering it to be "just soda," and seems to be the only non-cultist who's okay with it. Or the fact that he's actually been awake on Derse since before the game (but unable to hear the horrorterrors, maybe foreshadowing some psychic resistance?) which he casually reveals to Kanaya and which Terezi is aware of, hence he's included in the people she names are "in" on the existence of the game. Or the fact that the genetic code for Alternia's first guardian was written within the pages of four FLARP books, with the addition of a fifth code Gamzee wrote in Karkat's ~ATH book... but Eridan was the fifth FLARP player in the team, implying that Doc Scratch/LE influencing Gamzee caused him to usurp Eridan's part of the first guardian code, giving LE his way into the trolls' universe.

Individually, it's all kind of nothing, but it just paints a bigger picture of Eridan being weirdly relevant, especially when we get to the juicy stuff:

The Prophecy

ARANEA: The 8ard of Hope may seem a little jaded these days, 8ut he once had a deeply a8iding faith in magic, and dedicated himself to 8ecoming a great wizard. He 8ecame convinced he was hatched to defeat an extraordinarily evil magician, one he swore the angels foretold of. ... [T]his magician once somehow from afar tried to strike him down at a young age, so he would never have to face him. 8ut the evil spell was deflected, sealing the magician's spirit away in a series of unassuming vessels until he could find some other cunning way to enter our universe. ... ARANEA: 8ut at some point he 8ecame disillusioned with magic. If there ever was any truth to his far fetched vision, the legacy of defeating the evil magician would have to 8e passed on to his descendant, or if his descendant proved to 8e as much of a failure as he did, then perhaps on to some other Hero of Hope.

ERIDAN: i slaughtered enough angels to knoww my limits and wwhere i stand against the lord of all angels they prophecized

GG: im pretty sure hes from the future! CA: wwhy GG: because he said hes my grandson CA: wwhat the fuck is a grandson CA: is that some kind of pervverse human familial thing GG: umm yes ... CA: that gun i just gavve you is somethin of a hatchright to the kid CA: happy i could play a role in your dirty stinkin lineage GG: like an heirloom? i guess it could be ... CA: i kinda think thats wwhy i found the gun in the first place CA: but noww im forsakin it because fuck i just found a better destiny than my old crappy one wwhich i nevver got any appreciation for anywway

Jake is supposed to have been the one to defeat Lord English. (No, Jake defeating pre-LE Caliborn right before he gets sealed into Cal doesn't count! He doesn't even get the final blow in that fight, DIRK does.)

But Eridan at one point had that destiny on his shoulders. Aranea turbohealing Jake, and the resultant hope field, summons a bunch of angels, which are heavily associated with Eridan - yet another random connection that Eridan has with future plot events.

Jake was another character, alongside Karkat, who was kind of reduced to a joke by the end, despite the fact that he had literally, directly, been passed the destiny of defeating Lord English. It's hard not to see this as a consequence, at least in part, of removing Eridan from the story. By cutting him out of the fabric of the ending, several plot threads - including this prophecy - are left dangling in irrelevance. And so Jake, like Karkat, now has nothing to do.

Homestuck is generally a series where every prophecy does come true, which makes it kind of startling when several prophecies fail to - Feferi's to "unite the two races," Jake's to defeat Lord English, and Karkat's to bring "compassion, forgiveness, and equality among all bloodlines" in the Signless's place.

That last one is actually relevant to:

The Thematic Importance of EriKar As Soul Mates

Eridan represents the worst aspects of Alternian society. He's a sea dweller at the top of the caste structure, with free reign to murder whoever he wants, soaked in the blood of thousands of innocent trolls. He espouses the casteist rhetoric that their society is built on, calling for the deaths of all land dwellers and the oppression of the lower castes. And while he should be benefitting from his position of privilege, it has also done nothing but hurt him.

Karkat, meanwhile, is a pariah. A mutant who would've been culled on sight, who spent his entire life living in hiding, and most of the game in fear that he would be ostracized or worse by the rest of his friends if they found out about his blood color. He's also the second coming of Troll Jesus, and thus, more despised by the Alternian ruling class than a mutant normally would be. For most of his life, he dreamed of nothing more than finding belonging within the society that had deemed him unfit.

Their friendship is something that "should not be." The highblood and the mutant. The royal-v and the off-spectrum. The empress's sea dweller and the second coming of the signless. Eridan "should" see Karkat as a miscreant to cull on sight. Karkat "should" be terrified of Eridan's very existence.

But in reality, Eridan doesn't give a shit about blood color, and Karkat just wants to be accepted. Eridan just wants someone to care about him, and Karkat loves his friends. Aside from Feferi, Eridan is the only highblood who never comments about Karkat's mutant blood, and they were best buddies even before Eridan knew.

Eridan and Karkat getting together isn't JUST the two most undateable trolls on the team finally landing a stable quadrant. These two, moreso than any other pairing, represent the themes of Homestuck. Children growing up, caring about each other, and throwing off the shackles of their old society.

In the pre-retcon timeline, their team failed to do so. This led to Gamzee falling into his highblood clown cult, Equius letting himself and Nepeta die by submitting to his place in the hemospectrum, Vriska killing Tavros because she couldn't allow herself to show weakness, and Eridan completing his caste's dream of genocide. Karkat spent the entire meteor trip and beyond beating himself up about it, since he considered it all to be his fault.

But with the introduction of John's retcon powers, they have the chance to, one by one, redeem themselves. I believe that's how the original ending would have gone: Terezi would ask John to bring Vriska back, because she only feels comfortable fixing her own mistakes. Vriska would then have asked John to bring back Tavros, whom she regretted killing. Tavros would be there for Gamzee, rendering him an ally. Gamzee would ask John to bring back Equius and Nepeta. Equius would ask John to help him not make the same mistakes with Aradia, and Aradiabot would catch John by the wrist and demand he bring her back in time to before she died, allowing her to circumvent her own death and Sollux's guilt. Sollux would ask John to keep him from provoking Eridan, saving Feferi. And Feferi would be pretty ok with the way things were... but KARKAT would then pull John aside, and drop an entire book of mistakes he made on John's lap, and this would result in a finalized timeline where all his friends are alive and god-tiered.

Because all the trolls SHOULD have survived.

Vriska should've survived because people should be allowed to have second chances.

Tavros should've survived because caring about each other, and being willing to show kindness and mercy, are good things.

Gamzee should have survived because people mired in religious fundamentalism and cults deserve to be offered a helping hand.

Equius should've survived because people should be allowed to grow and change their beliefs.

Nepeta should've survived because she was the anti-casteism troll. Casteism is bad, folks! Not only that, but I'm convinced that she was originally going to give the Ultimate Self exposition, and Davepetasprite^2 had to be contrived in the canon ending in order to shortcut Nepeta's character development, ruining it in the process.

Aradia should've been allowed to stay with the rest of the team and live a life free of the control of evil uncles and shitty ancestors.

Sollux should've been allowed to stay with the rest of the team because we all deserve to heal and be happy.

Feferi should've survived so she could be in a kismesistude with Nepeta, and realize that casteism itself is bad, not just the definition of culling, and then used her Witch of Life powers to even out the lifespans between the next generation of trolls, which needs to happen or else casteism will just happen again as long-lived highbloods inevitably amass power. And, also, it would complete the prophecy Gl'bgolyb gave her that she was intended to unite the two races (dream bubbles don't count, because by that metric, Sollux did more than she did by establishing a connection between the trolls and humans).

And Eridan should've survived, because the harm society has done to us can be undone. We don't have to submit to the roles it imposes, to the laws it wrote, to the abuse it inflicted. We can be free.

I've seen a lot of people who believe that such-and-such character did SUCH awful things that they don't deserve a happy ending. Oftentimes, it's Eridan, but nearly all of the dead trolls have gotten this treatment. So, let me just ask all of you who have gotten this far and still hold that opinion one thing. Do you think that's what Troll Jesus would have wanted?

This is why pale EriKar is so important: for it to happen, Eridan has to make a choice between upholding the beliefs of his shitty society, or pursuing a happier, kinder future, one where he outright rejects the caste system. For it to happen, Karkat has to shake all his insecurities about not being good enough by Alternian standards, and take on the duty of creating something better than what he came from. If pale EriKar happens, it means Eridan and Karkat choose love, not fear. Compassion, forgiveness, and equality.

This choice - this pairing - is the ultimate representation of giving Alternian society one big middle finger. Saying, we don't need you anymore, fuck off! Saying, we reject you at your core; we will choose something better! Saying, we will create a new world, and it will be kinder than the one we came from!

Pale EriKar means LOVE WINS.

Thank you for reading.

[localducks]

A monster fuckers guide to the brothers

♡I like creature design, and this is a perfect overlap in interest for me....so I wanted to see how "odd" I could make the brothers outside of what I consider a very basic cannon.

♡ This is supposed to be gender neutral, but the reader is assumed to be AFAB

Lucifer

Cum

lu..Lucifer's cum is black, deep black only broken up by the slight blue shimmer you can only really see if you look at it sideways. And it's clingy, branching off in webs when caught on fingers and sticking to the inside of your thigh like saliva. You will also be immediately made aware of how much of it there is, a trait all demons share but one the avatar of Pride specifically has a deep appreciation for. He could fill a 16oz cup in one go, and while he doesn't technically have a breeding kink(liar), the sight of his partner full and satisfied always leaves him with a deep desire for more.

Dick

One of the least monstrous of his brothers, what he lacks in form he makes up for in show. The tip is black, nearly as dark as his cum, and as it slowly gradients out of the color the blue undertones of his skin become much more apparent. He's the second largest, and so similarly to Beel, his dick excretes a thin slip to make the squeeze easier, which has a red shimmery tint to it. But it's actually neither of these things that take you the most off guard. You notice an odd change the first time he cums, either while deep inside you or as he slipping back in, a small voice in the back of your mind hurridly asking whether you can even be sure if what you think is happening is the truth. But by the thrid or fourth time Lucifer has cum, the matter becomes undeniable. His cock starts off at a moderate length and girth, clearly that of something not so human, but managable enough. The kicker is that for every time he cums, he grows, swelling larger as your body becomes more relaxed and pliable, able to take more and more of him every time he dips back within the glistening confines of your body. He doesn't even bring it up the first time you are intimate together, finding the look of pure shock deliciously adorable. What a predicament you've found yourself in, but it can't hurt to go for just a few more hours, could it?

Teeth

True and proper vampire teeth, honestly not much else to say. Lucifer finds them to be one of the least interesting aspects of himself in comparison to his brothers(not that he compares himself to his siblings, why would you ever assume such a thing, he's so very above that), but you would probably beg to differ when he jams them into your neck as he cums. Lucifer is tall, much much taller than most humans, and just like all of his brothers he's proportionate to that height, so for you, a human, his teeth are about an inch, or the length from the tip of your finger to the first knuckle. Both sets of canines on the top and bottom jaw, by the way.

Tongue

In comparison to the rest of the attributes talked about so far, his tongue might be the strangest in appearance. Long, very warm, and paler than a human's, it has a texture you could only describe as rigid, the series of buds along its surface being much wider than yours or mine, with little feeler nodes along ths sides of it towards the back. You won't notice it until it's tasting at the skin of your neck or hips, but they can also move when he feels like it, silently taking pleasure in the little jolts of surprise you offer unsolicited as reaction. While the color of the muscle itself isn't really noticeable, the saliva it leaves behind on your skin is transparent and dark, bordering on black.

Mammon

Cum

Mammon's cum....is iridescent gold, and has the same texture as a humans. He doesn't cum as much as many of his brothers, so instead he can go 5 to 6 times without getting tired, back to back. His sin affects him greatly during sex, seeking his and your release with seemingly infinite desperation, not caring about his own overstimulation and fatigue if it means he will get to please you entirely again, sometimes getting to a point you have to use your pact to pull him out of the self inflicted trance. He adores you so much, so much more than words or thoughts could ever allow him to say, so please, just lay back and let him have one more of your pretty orgasms, you don't understand how much he needs it.

Dick

His dick also mostly appears human, save for its length and the slight abnormality of the head having three raised ridges along the back of it. The only other thing that would really alert you to the fact he isn't human are his marking patterns, which run along the shaft like veins. They are in the same style as the ones decorating his torso when in his demon form(and they glow too).

Teeth

You can't tell me Mammon doesn't have gold teeth, I simply won't take criticism, I'm dying on this hill. Just his top canines though, which are moderately sized and sharp, jutting out of a smirk or sneer. The rest are just incisors and molars, though all of them take on a sharp edge while in his demon form. Mammon takes great pleasure in biting you, no matter the occasion or who's around, especially if it's one of his brothers. It feeds the desire to tell others you're his without being too intrusive on your time and boundaries, and he also just really likes the feeling of sinking his teeth into you. He is gentle about it, only ever biting as hard as you're comfortable with, but just know he can't quite help himself around you all of the time, and if a reason to make it abundantly clear you are his arisise, be warned he will be covering you as much as possible with the indents of his teeth.

Tongue

Mammon's tongue is long, like longest only second to Levi, reaching about 9" inches inside you with more strength behind it than any human could. Yet despite this not much else is out of the ordinary for a demon. The texture of it is only a little rougher than yours, and it has the exact same pink hue to it. The tip of it though is thin and tapered, perfect for precision, with a venom piercing running through it. A matching one sits much further up, vertical this time, which he clicks against his teeth when bored, or, a new favorite of his, right into your ear, taking great delight in watching you squirm at the sound.

Leviathan

Cum

Levi's cum is milky and paper white, almost appearing sheer under some lights but only if he's cum within the last few hours. And it's thick, like gelly almost thick. Like pulling thick, and one load is enough to fill a tea cup. Given the situation with his dick, that might seem a little less than expected, and then you realize it thickens after being ejected into you, developing into a soft warm goop that sticks to your walls and often requires a finger(or tongue) to leave the confines of your body. Otherwise it will be left inside, and considering how much Levi cums, it might end up places only his tail can reach, if you would let him(please please let him).

Dick

Levi was nervous to have sex with you for a list of reasons, a long, long list of reasons, and somewhere close to the top, was how different he knew his anatomy was in comparison to a human’s. And even though he knew you would probably like it, it didn’t quell the seething embarrassment he felt the first time you got both his pants and boxers off. But instead of the immediate rejection he feared, expected really, to squish onto your face and through your voice, you just sat there, looking at him with your mouth slightly agape and your eyes drooping, hearts nearly visible in them if he imagined hard enough. Cute, all other thoughts left his brain other than that. You were so, so cute. How in the three realms had he ended up with the most perfect human he could possibly ask for. And one so eager to please, at that.

And to be far, you had good reason to stare. Levi has two dicks(such widely known fan canon the developers might as well just come out and say it) that fall somewhere between human cock and tentacle territory given the firmness of the first and the flexibility of the second. Both start thick and then slowly taper out until they’re about the same thickness as his tongue, with ribbing all the way down to where they peak out of his body. There isn’t a head to the shape, ending instead of a blunt point. There are no scales to be seen, but the coloration is similar, starting off black at the base and then gradually turning blue. They can each move on their own, often meaning he doesn’t have to thrust as much, but he can’t control them, so don’t blame him when the stimulation gets to be too much for both of you, clamping around them will just cause them to wiggle harder. He’s sensitive too, all of him including the vent his dicks peak from, which you can stick your fingers into if you want him cumming within seconds. When he’s not “hard”, his cocks stay sheathed within the vent, able to close almost entirely.

Teeth

SHARK TEETH SHARK TEETH SHARK TEEEETH. Levi has the second biggest chompers out of his brothers, each chunky and pointed, ready and poised to bite. Not that he would, and if he happened to get too caught up in the moment and sink those teeth into your shoulder or more likely your thigh, please expect more than an hour or so of apololigetic after care centered around that bite.

Tongue

Long, thin in comparison to his brothers, and significantly forked, Levi's tongue keeps with his overall theme pretty well. It's very flexible, and both of the forks can move on their own in a similar way his dicks can, but he has much more control over it. The actual texture of his tongue might be the oddest thing about it, as it's practically smooth to the touch, only a couple bumps and ridges making themselves clear if you run your tongue or fingers over it. His saliva doesn't really help you find anything more about it either, as it's thicker than a humans and clingier, the strands that connect you two when making out far less likely to break from just moving back. The coloration is like a humans, but the further back into his mouth the darker blue his skin gets.

Satan

Cum

Satan's cum, similar to Lucifers, is sticky, black, and potent, a single load enough to fill a jar. It clings to the slick and sweat your body makes, only really able to be cleaned off with a good soak. He cums longer than normal too, every demon does, but he specifically takes 1-2 minutes to empty himself completely.

Dick

Pretty. Ooooohhhhhh he's pretty. He actually has the most normal looking cock out of all of his brothers, long and thick and pale all the way down until you get to his tip which blushes red under attention. And that's it, at a first look. No ridges or odd shapes. You might even consider him average by demon standards. So when he sits you down a couple days after the first time you are intimate together and he starts talking about how he has a knot, it throws a wrench in the preconceived notions you had had. But he is a demon, this shouldn't be such a surprise, you think. You sit there a little stunned as he explains every precaution he's thought of and how to best make you most comfortable with the strangeness of difference(you shut that train of thought down immediately), but it's not until he starts explain the internal functions his dick has that really brings you back to reality. There are two feeler like structures that can extend from his urethra, designed to add another layer of pleasure for both him and his partner, but they can also gently pry open the cervix in order to add more real-estate for his cum.

Teeth

Satan doesn't like his teeth. In his opinion they get in the way too much, too sharp and inconvenient towards the words he uses on a daily basis and hard to be delicate with. But under this opinion, deep in a far corner of his mind, he does think they would look nice sunk into the skin of your thigh. Or your wrist, or your neck. His teeth consist of front insicors, just like a humans, and then immediately become razor-sharp canines that vary in size but are all the same shape, curved in towards the inside of his mouth.

Tongue

His tongue on the other hand, he likes. If only because it's fun to mess with when he's bored. Shorter by demon standards, meaning it's about 6 or 7 inches, with a tip that can fold in on itself and bristles running all the way down each side, which he can twitch or vibrate at will. The texture isn't sharp or rough, but grippy, more similar to the feeling of a tentacle rather than a cats tongue. The pigmentation of the muscle is a light pink, and he has a tongue peircing towards the very back of his mouth, not really noticeable until he's burying it as far into you as it will go.

Asmodeus

Cum

The first thing you might notice about Asmo's cum is that it smells nice. Everything is nice about it, actually. It's warm but not hot, glides and smears smoothly, it has a dusty pink hue and is pearlescent when seen under light, and it smells...like roses. Surprise!, the avatar of Lust's cum was basically designed to be as pleasing as possible. And then, you start to feel hot. Your skin gets so sensitive that a single soft breath against it makes you squirm, reeling back as a new stream forms between your legs. At this point, you might as well name it, cause it's not drying up anytime soon.

As you might have guessed, Asmo's cum(and saliva) contains a very strong aphrodisiac, known to be the strongest in the realm. He also cums about the same amount as a human in his "normal" form, but that quantity triples when in his demon form.

Dick

Most people would describe Asmo’s skin as either silky, buttery, or at its worst glossy, and while he spends a lot of time making sure his complexion is perfect, less people know how much of that texture is actually natural. Being the avatar of lust means he has a much larger range of things he can make his flesh contort into than most demons, resulting in the smooth feeling of his skin and the almost infinite give it has, all things that extend down to his dick. He has a preferred length and girth, the latter being moderate by demon standards but the former being long, easily poking and prodding far deeper than even some of his brothers, but it’s the additions he’s made that makes blood rise to his face the first time you see him. Amidst the soft shade of his skin sits ring after ring of muscle, taking on the form of ridges most of the time, that start at the head and descend all the way down to the base, thin and waved but when swollen become much more than you might be able to deal with the first time you’re intimate. And to top it all off, they’re pink, and not just blush pink, they’re as pink as his nails. As stated above, his cum does act like an aphrodisiac, but so does his pre, turning your body into a warm, soft toy for him to use for hours on end. All you have to do is lay there and let him see your face while he feeds, don’t worry about anything else. Not that you’ll be able to anyway.

Teeth

Asmo has fangs, which are short, sharp, and venomous, layered two rows deep on both the top and bottom jaw. From the first set of canines flows a more concentrated version of the aphrodisiac found in his saliva and cum, and the second set administers a paralysis venom that gives the body that numb comfortable feeling, making you less susceptible to any stimulation other than pleasure. The rest of his teeth look like a human's, though they are much sharper than they appear.

Tongue

Strange. Similar to the rest of his body Asmo can manipulate his tongue to be just about anything he wants it to be, but when neutral about how it appears, one might consider it strange. Contrived of two main appendages that can split seamlessly into more, the texture is somewhere between flower petal and suade fabric, with a shocking clearness that reminds you of jello. The color of it is pink, but the longer he's gone without a meal the darker the pink gets, until it's almost black at the tip. They are thinner in thickness than most of his brothers, but just as flexible, easily allowing him to funnel his spit into your mouth or either hole, skin prickling with excitement as he watches it's effects spread through your body. The feeling is warm, not hot, and arousal flows in steady waves, making you have to rely on him more than you might think. But don't for a second think he minds, all he wants is for the two of you to know pleasure so deeply it makes even you bones feel the drag of his tongue, the touch of his fingers, and the desire of being filled.

Beelzebub

Cum

Beel's cum has a constancy somewhere between human cum and slick, thick, and has about the same color as both of them combined too. The main thing with him is that he cums, a lot. Like enough to fill a bucket, or two. His dick also excretes a thin slip that allows him a smoother entrance.

Dick

Beel is giant physically in general, so it wouldn't be that much of a surprise(in theory) to know his dick is also big. But the other ways in which you can immediately tell he's not human might come as more of a shock. The underside is covered in rows of ridges, all pointing in the direction of the tip, which is also much more angular than a human's, nearly coming to a flat tip. The top side is almost softly segmented, sort of like an accordion, so the length of him becomes longer as he pulls out and then contracts back when pushing in. And in addition, to all of this, the ridge that sits right under the head of his cock, can vibrate. It only really happens when he's super worked up or about to cum when he's in his "human" form, but it starts almost the second he's inside you when in his full demon form. He tries to be careful about overstimulating you, but he can't do much when your fourth orgasm in a row has stripped him of the ability to use words.

Teeth

Big chompers. His canines are the largest out of all of them two sets in the front of mouth and two sets in the back, with the bottom ones being larger than the top ones. But the rest fall somewhere in sharpness between molars and canines, all of them about as wide as the width of your finger in order to allow for maximum crunch potential. Beel likes to bite, but he's hyper aware of how strong he is and thereby has taken immense time in figuring out how hard he can bite without breaking skin and what it takes to taste the warm syrup flowing beneath it. He also really like seeing his bites after the fact, often causing a pretty blush to adorn his face in response while he thinks about how many more are hiding beneath your clothes.

Tongue

Beel's tongue is only a little bit longer than average length for demons, but the thickness and wideth of it is almost uncalled for. At this point it's unlikely this will surprise you very much, you've seen him eat an entire carton of ice cream without a spoon because he was so impatient or something of the like at some point, but that still doesn't really prepare you for the amount it fills your mouth the first time you make out. You very easily could be made to choke on it, and you can feel all of the texture of it despite the copious flow of spit in between your mouths. Beel's tongue is kinda similar to Satan's in its feel, designed to peel meat off of bones and burrow under skin, yet surprisinglyit feels more like silk getting dragged across your flesh more than anything. All of it is a pale dusty rose color, with only the tip dipping into red territory.

Belphegor

Cum

Belphie's cum, is both lavender tinted and lavender scented. And while he doesn't cum as much as his twin, he cums for about as long as Satan. His dick is really sensitive, so it doesn't take much to set him off, you just have to be careful when you're giving him head. Beel is the same way, but if he came down your throat you might choke to death.

Dick

He's not the thickest out of all of his brothers, but he sure is one of the longest. His dick stays the same color as his skin the entire time, only when under a lot of denial does it turn just the slightest bit red, but the skin is soft, and he's very very sensitive, only needing a few soft words and a warm hand to get him begging for you sometimes. The single most notable thing about him though are the soft spikes protruding from the sides of his cock, starting off largest by the tip and decending in size a half inch apart all the way down to his base, where they almost become invisible. Most of the time, they seem like little more then nodes, brushing along your silky walls as you clamp around him and feeling where they push against you, causing both of you to moan with delight. But other times, on those not so rare occasions where someone earlier that day forgot you were his and his brothers first and foremost, you are treated to the full extent of Belphies strength. The spikes can harden, not to the point of pain, but if he doesn't want you going anywhere, you'd be hard pressed to leave. All of them possess this ability, and the smaller ones are even able to lengthen, almost giving him the girth some of his older brothers have. He gets so smug when he does it without warning you too, teasing about the obscene faces you're making while barely being able to hold onto himself, the warmth of you and how pretty you look adding to the clouded hazy already draped over his mind. He especially likes doing it after he's just cum, forcing you to stay connected to him in one of the most intimate ways possible.

Teeth

Belphie's teeth are actually pretty similar to Beel's, just with two even sized canines instead of the four his twin has. His teeth almost get smoother the further back into his mouth they go, but his bite strength is about the same as Beel's too, so mind your fingers if you choose to feed him. He's one of the biters, greatly enjoying greeting you with a nip to your neck or nibbling on your fingers while you two watch a movie together.

Tongue

Belphies tongue is thick, velvet soft, and tri pronged, each tip breaking off from the main chunk of muscle about a ¾ of an inch up. It's weird, cause you wouldn't assume it has that shape when he talks, or even quite when it's in your mouth, but once he's dragging it over your nipples or along the lips of your cunt it's a little less deniable. Belphie loves licking you, whether it's because he wants your attention or he just wants something to do with his mouth, he frequently will find any excuse necessary to have the feel and taste of your skin under his tongue, often with the added bonus of you pulling him away so he can put it to better use.

[heeliopheelia]

"i've missed you" (heeseung x reader)

genre: light angst, fluff word count: 1.3k requested by @probably-too-obssessed ♡

warnings: mentions of a break up, exes to lovers, crying

a/n: was the plan in my head perfect: yes. do i like the execution:... okay, ik this ain't technically a drabble but bear with me!! but anyways, we're officialy more than half done with the 1k event yayy!!

masterlist

Wiping the sleep out of your eyes, you make your way past the living room to answer the door. Knowing that only the closest people to you know the code to your apartment block's stairway, you can't help but worry as you approach the knocking on your door at such early hour. Has something happened? Did someone get hu-?

Suddenly more awake than a second before, you gape at ex-boyfriend in shock. Wide eyes scan his face, his brows slightly furrowed as he chews on his bottom lip, fingers twitching by his thighs. And you can't help but notice that he looks... the same. Yes, a little more mature now compared to the few years ago, features more defined than before but that's still most definitely Heeseung. Your Heeseung.

"What are you doing here?" You ask quietly, feet rooted into the floor as cold winter air sweeps from the stairway and engulfs your thinly-clothed body. You try to pretend that this sudden coolness is the cause of the shiver that runs down your spine but at the same time you know well that it's all because of Heeseung's relentless eyes placed on you.

"Hi," he breathes out and feels his heart coming up to his throat. Fuck, you're even prettier than he remembered. He clears his throat. "Can I come in?"

Somehow you muster the courage to nod your head and move back to open the door wider for him. As he sets his foot in your apartment, an instant wave of nostalgia and longing fills his heart to the brim and for the first time in three years Heeseung doesn't feel this void that's been constantly eating him from the inside. And it's all after spending only a minute with you again.

"I've missed you," he blurts out without wasting any more time, watching as your shoulders visibly tense. He takes a step closer and then one more, moving to stand right in front of you. "I'm sorry it took me so long to say it."

Pressing your lips together, you hide the trembling of your fingers by clenching them on the fabric of the shirt you've been sleeping in. His shirt which only now you seem to realize to be wearing and so does Heeseung as his eyes soften. And it makes him hope that maybe you too, after all this time, still keep a place in your heart for him.

Your heart pounds in your chest.

"You–," you stutter out, head full of running thoughts. Why is he here now? What's caused him to go against his manager and contract and show up at your door at 5 am? "Heeseung, where is this all coming from?"

"Ever since the night I broke up with you, there hasn't been a day without you on my mind." You can clearly see the distress and pain marring his soft features. "I'm sorry I fucked up, I never should've ended things with you back then."

And yes, you've missed him too. Yes, you've thought about him way too much for someone who's supposed to be over the relationship for at least two years now. But it's Heeseung after all. How does one simply move on from him?

But you keep a brave face and decide to be the more reasonable one out the two of you for once in your entire life. "There's nothing to apologize for, don't be ridiculous"

He scoffs, running his hand through his thick hair from frustration. "I was selfish. I dropped you for fame–"

"You left me for your dreams, Heeseung," you interrupt him with a scolding look. "And you did the right thing. I'd never want to be the one holding you back. Stop being so self-critical."

His eyes soften and he breathes out, all the tension leaving his body. "You could never hold me back, YN. I hate that only now I realized that you were the only thing that's kept me grounded. I'm no one without you."

Your heart stutters when his hands reach out and envelop your slightly trembling ones. "I don't know, Hee. There's just... There's so much happening right now, I can't think straight."

"I still love you." His words knock all the air out of your lungs and you swear you're falling. "After all this time, there's never been anyone else but you, love. I'd drop everything in an instant if you asked me to give my all to you right now. Everything loses its value when you're not there with me, I've learnt it the hard way."

"I–"

Your quiet stumbling gets cut off by his hands suddenly loosing their grip on yours. You watch as realization tinted with fear slowly creeps up on his beautiful face. All of sudden, Heeseung feels all of his muscles tensing as his heart drops down his chest, heavy and aching.

Already dreading your answer, he asks. "Do you... Do you have someone?"

"N-No!" You stutter out quickly, hands suddenly gaining a mind of their own as they desperately clutch on his again, heart wrenching as you already miss his touch even though he hasn't even fully pulled away. "I couldn't. Not after you."

"Then give us another try," he breathes out, chest feeling almost fifty pounds lighter at your quiet confession. His fingers quickly intertwine with yours as he pulls you closer with one tug. Your heart stalls when he leans down and starts kissing away the tears that you haven't even noticed started dropping down your cheeks. "All I want is you, YN. And there will never be anyone but you for me."

His lips trail down your cheeks, peppering kisses all over your jawline and chin and before you can even blink, your mouths are moving together in despair. The kiss is soaked and dripping with longing and love as you both pour all of the emotions from deep within into it. Even when your lips start to slightly burn from the saltiness of your tears and Heeseung's harsh sucks, you never even think of pulling away just for a second. It's only your muffled sob that makes the two of you part.

"I missed you so much," you cry out, trembling hand coming up to cover the bottom of your wet face. It doesn't take long for him to gently pull it away and bring it closer to him, pressing his warm lips to your knuckles. You sniffle, only to feel more tears following down your cheeks. "I've watched your every single performance, you know?" You chuckle shortly trough the sobs. The smile you sent him is wobbly and teary but so full of love it makes Heeseung feel the happiest he's been for the past couple years. "I'm so proud of you."

Your words impact him harder than he would ever admit, so before you can get the glimpse of his own eyes becoming glistening, he pulls you by your face and kisses you again, swallowing each one of your sobs and whimpers. Your hands tightly cling onto his hoodie as you find yourself becoming putty underneath his touch again. His slim fingers brush away the hair that got stuck onto your teary face, his caresses so gentle you can't help but feel your legs buckling slightly, so taking two steps backwards, you pull him on the couch along with you.

"I love you too," you whisper somewhere in between your ceasing cries and his kisses.

At that, Heeseung pulls himself up on his elbows to take in your pretty face. The face that he couldn't erase from his mind for all these years. The face that kept him awake every night until he passed out from exhaustion. The face that he loves more than anything else in this world.

And damn him if he ever found anything else that brought him as close to heaven as the sight of your swollen lips parted with a smile, blush spread over your cheeks as your eyes fill up with sparkles, looking at him as if he's collected all the stars from the sky and gave them to you. And fuck, if you really ever asked him to give you the entire moon itself, he knows that he would somehow find a way to make it happen. Because he would do absolutely anything and everything to make you happy. Even if it meant giving up his entire career – he will not make the same mistake twice and lose you again, now knowing that nothing is worth of the pain that being without you has put him through.

permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @luvmura @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @satoruskitchenrag @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @yoongspi

[eliciria]

hello love!

i saw that you write yandere material and are looking for inspiration! so if you don’t mind I’d love to request some yandere headcanons for satan from om (๑>؂•̀๑)

a/n : heyyy !! thanks so much for requesting. It's a bit short, I hope you don't mind.

whisper to the trees ... (ask box status) : open

check my about me/request rules here

wc : 0.67k words

cws : dark content, mdni! suggestive asf, mentions of kidnapping (not on you), potential smut in the end?

song playing : prayer1 by april27

Yandere! Satan headcanons

On a scale of 1-10, from how scary Satan would be compared to other demons if they were a yandere, I'd make Satan a solid 5.

I am not like Keith Lee, and I can't give that much of a rating without being a little bit biased. So I'll just try to validate my opinion.

Let's start with the fact that this man is pretty much the concept of a person who does his homework. He knows what makes you feel disgusted and what tingles your stomach in lust.

May or may not have studied human anatomy just to use it to his advantage.

Aching from school? He's already massaging the part between your shoulder and neck that makes you feel good, albeit a bit ticklish.

Someone flirted with you at school? Satan kidnaps them, syringes a lethal amount of vitamin c underneath their tongue, and leaves them out on the streets. People say the poor student died from cardiac arrest.

You were a bit uncomfortable after hearing that one. You had just talked to that demon after all. Were you next? Your train of thought was interrupted as Satan ruffles your hair, telling you to be safe. You offer him a smile, and you nod. (He watches as you walk to RAD, shuffling the syringe between his index and middle finger)

Doesn't let you leave his room, and not in the "I captured you" way that you'd imagine. Of course you have to go to school and, do the occasional meet up with those outside (Solomon checking on you), he lightly gaslights you into staying with him for the majority of your stay within HOL. (Little do you know, he may or may not have pulled some strings for you to stay with him here. You aren't leaving hell, sorry.)

Lends you his clothes, in fact, kind of pressures you to wear it. It triggers something in him, a desire. He wants to be all yours, and you to be all his. Wearing a shirt or one of his turtle necks solidifies the fact that you reciprocate this.

He knows what he's doing is toxic and wrong, but he attempts to justify it. (He is going through a crisis within himself trying to validate his gaslighting and manipulating.)

He's incredibly sweet to you, and I mean incredibly. Buying you your favorite drinks, reading to you, all that.

Follows the sidewalk rule for his life, always peels your oranges and whatever fruit you want, and always attempts to keep his anger from bubbling out.

It rarely ever works though, as he is still the avatar of Wrath. Rage bubbles out, especially if something happens to you in particular. Lucifer scolding him? Fine. Mammon stealing his books? He'll get him later. But you going missing? (You were late by 2 minutes..) He was beginning to feel nauseous, his fist clenching. He gripped the book in front of him, trying to keep calm. The ticking of the clock seemingly became louder, and right as he was about to start ravaging his room, a soft hand laid on his lower back.

"Satan?" You say softly, trying to determine whether or not he was angry. He lets out a breath. You smelled so nice. A bit too nice. He turns around. The way that he looked at you now made it seem like he wasn't fuming and holding in his barely contained anger a few seconds ago.

"Hm?" A smile on his face. You couldn't tell what he was thinking of, but the way that he gripped your hand after you stopped holding his shoulder, he probably needed some comfort. (You were dead wrong, he was holding in a boner right then and there.)

You hugged him, patting his back.

"Are you angry?" You mutter quietly. He blinks, before hugging you back "No, no I am not." He takes a whiff of your scent. Sweet. He suddenly gripped your waist, eliciting a yelp from you.

He has decided. Instead of ravaging the room, he'll ravage you instead.

a/n : i leave that to your imagination. reminder i do write smut, so this can continue! My requests are open, so please do request if you have something in mind! Thanks for reading.

[salted-bird]

Unique interactions aside I adore how Sinclair Who Shall Grip's character is reflected on the gameplay side, we are told through his Uptie story that he doesn't believe in Faust's cause as much as he *wants* to, and it shows, because he is just godawful at the job she gave him.

For starters, Nails, the thing that defines the faction; Shall Grip Sinclair can't inflict any stacks of it.

All other N-corp IDs we have so far can apply at least one Nails, and we are informed in N-corp Don's Uptie story that the nails possess a symbolic importance for them because "the reason we pierce evil with nails beeth to utilize them as tools so the One Who Grips may enact justice". It's all about the One Who Grips, and even at his worst Sinclair is unable to aid her beyond the surface level, quite literally he can't help Faust carry out her Execution because the skill requires Nails and he can't give them.

Though it doesn't end there, the more you use them the clearer it becomes that the Faust Who Grips and Sinclair Who Shall Grip IDs don't mesh together at all. Faust's nails inflict Bleed count, Sinclair needs Burn Count, Faust's passives heal SP, Sinclair needs to stay at low SP, Whistle gives Fanatic to two allies, Sinclair hogs one stack due to always being the lowest SP ally by kit-design, but then there's how he can't make proper use of the Fanatic buff because of the SP heal ruining his tails flips, so rather than helping it's like trying to put a torn band-aid over a wound when that Fanatic could be going to someone actually capable of benefiting from it.

Sure, his skills include effects that involve other N-corp units, but first, it's a selfish interaction, they can help Sinclair but the most he will give them is a pathetic 2 Bleed on the last hit from Amoral Enactment, and second, what little ways they have to help Sinclair pale in comparison to letting him fight alongside IDs from other faction, what's a 15% damage increase compared to rolling 30 on each one of Self-destructive Purge's coins, and what's 5 Burn Potency compared the obscene amounts of Burn Count Liu Hong Lu can provide for his second skill and E.G.O? The N-corp effects are pretty much just there as lip-service, which applies to Sinclair's half-baked belief in their cause too, he shines the most when going against Nails and Hammer, and that keeps being the case even for the ID that's supposed to be on their side.

I find it funny how the closest to a synergy you can find between Faust and Sinclair is Faustie's Gaze buff, which sums up their relationship perfectly. She points to something and Sinclair kills stuff, Sinclair's core personality remains unchanged just like how the only thing that Gaze does is provide a crude damage-buff that doesn't help with any of Sinclair Who Shall Grip's obtuse mechanics, but the 'Sinclair kills stuff' part is enough for Faust.

Lastly, another point that I love is Sinclair's physical types and resistances.

All his skills deal Blunt damage, which is exactly what the N-corp Inquisitors are weak to.

Other N-corp units deal Blunt damage too, but they also have Pierce skills that the Inquisitors endure, Sinclair on the other hand doesn't waste a single bit of damage when it comes to killing them ASAP, and unlike the rest of N-corp Units, Sinclair Who Shall Grip has an Ineffective resistance for Blunt, at the same time his resistance against Pierce is normal rather than fatal, meaning he can go against the Inquisitor enemies without worrying about dying in a blink because they simply can't strike his weakness.

But of course, there's one N-corp character who Sinclair can't deal with, and it isn't Kromer, you must have seen already how she gets staggered if you bring Sinclair against her.

No, the one Nails and Hammer member who can claim the title of best counter against Sinclair Who Shall Grip is funnily enough, Faust Who Shall Grip.

Emitter is weak to Lust but it doesn't matter because Faust resists the physical type of all her skills, her passive ruins Sinclair's rolls to the point he can hit 0 as a coin value, and guess what, Sinclair's base E.G.O, Branch of Knowledge, has a fatal weakness to Pride, the element of Faust's Execution skill.

There's something so twisted yet beautiful about the fact that even in gameplay terms, Sinclair can't hope to go against Faust, while she could easily get rid of him if she ever felt like it.

But of course, what I find even more beautiful is that Sinclair Who Shall Grip has one small means of rebellion left, one last tool that can he could use to hurt Faust if he ever dares go against her: Branch of Knowledge, the E.G.O that encapsulates Sinclair's sin.

Emitter also has a fatal weakness to Gluttony, and unlike Sinclair Who Shall Grip's own skills, its physical type matches Faust Who Grips fatal weakness to Slash, making it the ideal tool for killing her.

Given how turning a blind eye to everything as a way to cope is a big part of Sinclair Who Shall Grip's character, I like how the one thing he could theoretically use to break free from his dependence on Faust is a manifestation of his inner psyche literally called Branch of *Knowledge*, I would assume these are all coincidences if it were any other game but PM has put crazier details on their works before.

[our-neighbours-cat-is-a-menace]

Pretty boi

summary: in which, you're asked who you thought was the prettiest boy and not even a second later you respond with his name. unknowingly leaving him a flustered mess.

Starring: Diavolo and Leviathan

Diavolo

"so who do you think is the prettiest boy in RAD?" asmo asked teasingly, quite hoping it's gonna be him

"the founder" you firmly said as if it was a fact

"what?" asmo raising a brow

"what?" you doing the same thing

"you're being biased, you know" asmo pouted

"biased how" you chuckled

"you say he's pretty just because you have a total crush on him" asmo reasoned

"haha no, he is pretty, regardless of my affections for him" you stated

While bickering back and forth with asmo, both of you failed to realize you're chatting in the balcony at the castle of the person in question

Lord Diavolo and Barbatos seems hesistant to open the door leading to the balcony as it would be quite embarrassing to enter

"shall i open it now my lord?" barbatos inquired, hands still on the doorknob for the past 5 minutes

"not yet"

"how about now?" - barbatos asked again after a minute or so

"no, not yet" Dia answered

"My lord, if were gonna wait until the blush on your face disappears before we enter, I'm afraid the tea will have already gone cold" Barbs stated with a firm voice but a teasing look

"... let's just go back, i can't face them" Dia says completely red

Leviathan

There is currently an event in RAD

As a way to reward the students in finishing the exams, a sports festivals was held with your suggestion

What's a sports festival without a race and there is no way you are not gonna participate even though your opponents are demons

Are you familiar with the race in which in between races you take a piece of paper from a basket, read and take a person from the crowd that best represent the words written in the paper and finish the race together

Yep, that's the game you're participating now (i don't know the name)

You're in position, waiting for a bang to officially start running

Once the race started, you ran as fast as you can but compared to the others you're like a snail

Nevermind the speed, you are about to grab a paper from the basket and read what's written

"Prettiest person you know"

Your eyes scanned through the audience and disappointingly not finding the demon you're looking for

No choice

"LEVIATHAN, COME TO ME!!" you shouted at the top of your lungs, summoning the demon from out of nowhere

The moment levi appeared in front of you, you had the audacity to show him a toothy grin, grabbed his hand and yell run

Levi was more than disoriented. But nevertheless ran

It took him a few seconds to register he's in a race.

He was quick to notice how you guys were losing. Thus he quickly took matters in his own hands, scooped you bridal style and finished the race in first place

"Leviii we won!" you cheered hugging the life out of the demon, not minding how levi has become

"So what was written in your paper miss? " the announcer asked from the microphone

You were quick to unlatch yourself from the blushing tomato and grab the microphone to answer enthusiastically

"THE PRETTIEST PERSON I KNOW" you cheered, loud enough for the whole venue to hear

There was a momentary silence and eyes were drifting between you and the Avatar of Envy

After hearing that, Levi malfunctioned and became beet reed from ears to his entire face, covering his mouth which was attempting to form a squiggly smile

The crowd cheered loudly and the brothers did not miss to add a comment

" good for you leviathan" from satan

"awee how cute" from asmo

"congratulations levi" from beel

"don't turn into a tomato" from mammon

"breathe levi" from belphie

"prepare for cpr, belphie" from lucifer

"hell no" - belphie

A/N: I have been inactive for soooo long but I'm backkkk

Masterlist🌻

[imhidingonceagain]

Slimeriana and QSMP fans, we need to talk (really, I'm going to talk about a few things).

CW: nsfw

Warning: long post.

At this point I think majority of you guys know what happened with Mariana yesterday (especially because the fliporiana community is small compared to other ones).

I'm gonna write some stuff Mariana said and I'm gonna be explicit about it because I want you guys to understand the severity of the situation (this is your warning):

Context: He was curious to see if people actually posted nsfw stuff about him (and poor boy, he really thought he wouldn't find any).

And I quote what he said after seeing some posts: "No, no, no! Why's Slime penetrating me?!" (He was probably looking at a fanart)

"I'm not doing role like that with Slime anymore. I thought you guys found it funny (he was talking about the sex role in the QSMP) but it only fills your minds with shit"

"I'm gonna say it in English because I know there's QSMP fans who do it as well: Don't draw hentai about me, don't draw us fucking, that's being a pervert, that's wrong"

Some months ago I wrote a post when we got the first warning in regards of this topic.

Mariana and Slime have talked about fanart before and at the time they didn't seem uncomfortable about it (though it seems like Charlie's girlfriend was).

So I wrote: it's not necessary to stop doing fanart about them. Just be careful with what you draw and where you post it.

To me even "suggestive" fanarts are "okay" (but with suggestive I mean the characters looking at each other like they want to kiss each other so bad, that's it). But when and how did that translate to some of you thinking that drawing real people having sex and not only having sex (because there's always ways to show intercourse without being explicit or disgusting) but also showing private parts is okay?

Because it's obvious Mariana saw something super explicit by the way he reacted (because he doesn't get bothered too easily). My poor man was distressed!

And let me tell you something. This is not only about Mariana and Slimecicle. This is a REAL PROBLEM within the fandom. Let me give you some examples:

I love reading fanfiction and months ago I was scrolling through the QSMP section on AO3 and let me tell you something: the amount of fanfiction written about the eggs and their parents in a non platonic way is CONCERNING.

Especially Wilbur Soot's fandom seems to have a lot of rotten apples who think that writing abusive stories about q! Wilbur and Tallulah is fine.

I understand some people write stories like that not because they're crime apologists, but because that's their way to deal with trauma (and dealing with trauma through art is okay). But PLEASE remember that while the eggs are fictional, their "parents" are REAL people.

Use fictional characters, please. Stop writing real people into pedophilic or highly abusive situations. THAT'S HORRENDOUS.

Another example is the following: Some weeks ago people were reporting a Twitter account and I clicked on the account (I personally don't like reporting people without making sure they deserved) and it took me like three seconds of scrolling to see more than 5 Ccs being disrespected (including Slimecicle, Quackity, Cellbit, Roier and Badboyhalo). Explicit Pictures, videos and fanarts were being posted about these creators.

You know what I think? I think Cellbit made his character asexual not only for the representation (it's clear by now that q! Cellbit is a sex positive asexual which is still representation yay!) But because he has been on the internet since around 2011 and he knows how disrespectful people can be. I think he knew that his and Roier's ship was getting too popular and that makes them both unprotected to shit like this.

Sadly, it's clear that it didn't matter that Cellbit made his character asexual, people can't seem to respect that detail about his character and about himself as a real person.

To some people it doesn't matter if the Cc is ambiguous or completely clear about their boundaries, they still don't give a fuck.

Please remember that behind each character is a real person. I understand sometimes you guys want to see your favorite characters fuck -me too, honestly- but for people like streamers that's out of the questions because not only they're real people, but because their work is related to social media and the possibilities of them finding EVERYTHING we write and post about them are super high.

I don't know how to feel. It's obvious that Mariana has not been feeling the same about the server since Juanaflippa died. Maybe this will make him feel even worse about the QSMP but I hope I'm wrong.

[silentwillowwhisperer]

Crush

Almost everyone in the fandom seems to agree that Lance made up the rivalry because of his repressed emotions towards Keith. Because he's a disaster and Keith's a disaster and their emotions are a disaster.

I feel like Keith would have some kind of sorting system in his head where he categorizes people by their importance and threat level. Shiro, for example, would be given an importance of 5/10 (that's really high) and a threat level of 3.5. (that's pretty low, Shiro may look scary, but Keith learns really fast that he's just a pile of emotional mush trapped in a disproportionally body.)

All of the students at the Garrison are automatically categorized as -3/10 in both importance and threat level, except Griffin who gets a -300/10 for importance and 8/10 for threat level. (he's evil and is absolutely asking to be punched anytime he opens his mouth, except adults will favor anyone over Keith so Griffin can get away with crap while Keith has to deal with his temper, hence the high threat level.)

So, Lance would automatically be place really low, and once you're placed low, it takes a whole lot to get Keith to notice you. He doesn't do it on purpose, even the categories are automatic and he barely thinks about it, also he's face blind and really honestly hates the Garrison and has only stayed this long because Adam is nice and a good cook (and Shiro is kinda ok too).

At most, maybe Keith would go, 'hey that dude's kinda cute,' at some point while people watching, but he thinks that fairly often and would forget the face in seconds. (He's not picky, okay?)

Like, compared to Keith, Lance's obliviousness is NOTHING. All it would take for him to realize the dumb crush is for Hunk to go, 'Lance, bud, I love you, but please for the love of garlic knots, stop your aggressive flirting with Keith.' And Lance would get all red and sputter out, 'What??? No! Keith? Ew? What no! He's so hot-headed and stubborn and can't talk to people to save his life, and sure objectively his eyes are kinda pretty and he seems to have some messed up-half dead sense of humor in in him and, oh. oh. OH.' And that would be that. (Pidge would pop her head into the room and pass a $10 bill to Hunk. (Where did the money come from? What are they gonna use it for in space?? No one knows.))

Keith would be some sort of repressed demiromantic or maybe he just doesn't give enough of a crap about people or maybe he gives too much of a crap and all of his feelings are too muddled up for him to identify the crush. Whatever it is, he does not get it till Shiro grips him by the shoulders and yells it in his face.

And then Keith can't look at Lance without his whole face turning red.

He's a mess.

They're both huge stupid messes.

And the team is sick of them.

(Keith moves Lance's threat level up to 38/10)

[akosijayjay]

January and February dump

This is my most recent work of Lloyd, and my most recent work in general. I made this in the computer room at school with a painful high-sensitive mouse. We have these special course thing in our junior high, so every tuesday after class, I get to be in the computer room. For six hours... (My course is Visual Graphics Design. I'm kinda regretting it now since I've been thinking of becoming an architect... I can't change my course now since it's too late. Which is stupid.)

I'll try to draw more there! I really like drawing with a mouse cause I like the challenge. And since I'm not accustomed to a high-sensitive mouse, it'll be a bigger challenge for me!

I made these two in traditional then polished them digitally since I straight up just used a pen. I rarely use a pencil nowadays so I can learn to fix mistakes without erasing it. Usually it ends up looking like chicken scratch but I'm getting better.

My Harumi one is so bad lol.. When I was making it, my classmates around me were messing around and moving the chairs in the process, making me have to draw strokes with shaky lines. It's not that noticeable though since I made the lines thicker.

I was planning to make something for Rebooted's anniversary but I got busy... (And lazy) The PIXAL one was inspired by an animatic I saw.

If you compare the previous Arin portrait, yes, they don't look the same. I'm trying to find a look for Arin, as I do with every character, that I'll be satisfied with.

By the way, I'm kind of basing Arin's hair with my classmate's hair. Which is funny because my other classmates compared this artwork to my classmate, who looked nothing like Arin but have similar hair, commenting they're the same. (I'm not mad because I actually find this a bit humorous)

I was trying to make an animatic and this was going to be the sketch. But then again, I got busy and lazy. (Mostly lazy)

I accidentally changed their facial features a bit by accident on the second page because I forgot to reference the first page. It was tiring flipping pages every 5 seconds, ok! Also, I drew it after 2 days when I drew the first page, and I didn't have a design I liked for them yet. (...I just noticed Jay has different eye colors in both pages...)

I think I'm sticking to these looks for Lloyd. I'll try to make it accurate to this. (I think I did great with the first image of this post. Though, I made him too round for my liking.)

Discard the growing beard post redesign Lloyd has. That beard thing was supposed to be where his chin was until I realized it was too small. And it's still too small.

Child Lloyd is so cute! The eyeshadow wasn't intentional at first, but then it got me thinking, what if Lloyd had an emo phase? And now emo child Lloyd is my headcanon.

Pre redesign Lloyd kind of reminds me of TommyInnit, and I find it quite funny. Maybe it's the facial gesture, I know a lot of TommyInnit fanarts with that silly face.

For Dragons Rising Lloyd however, I want him to have long hair with his post redesign face. I'll try to make full body designs of the 4 Lloyds.

You guys probably don't care, and this is the first time you've seen me because I don't have an exact artstyle and I dont post as much, but I'm going to put descriptions now since this blog is going to be a silly little art dump! And blog posts are supposed to be descriptive. Which I should've done in the beginning and explained my works..

Anyhow

If you liked my art, thank you!

If you saw me before and told me I did well, thank you and I'm sorry!! I know my previous posts have gotten comments and I'm sorry I didn't respond.. I'm not trying to be ungrateful, I just don't know how to express my appreciation for your positive feedback! Or just reply in general... I get nervous even when I'm wearing my mask..

Please don't hate me, I'm just really anxious to show my work to people I don't know to the point where I might think people disliked my artwork when it's the opposite..

(I'll probably copy paste this in future posts now lol. But I AM thankful that some of you guys think my works are great!)

[animehideout]

A Deal ( Ryomen Sukuna X Reader )

Part 6

Check out part 5 here.

a/n: Hi loves, sorry for the late update, I'm struggling with finding motivation since I'm active on both Tumblr and Wattpad.

‼️Since you voted for 3 different endings and I promised to write all of them, I'll start writing 3 different parts ( for exp 3 different versions of part 7 ) till we reach the end, since the events would obviously differ.

Warnings: NSFW MDNI ⚠️

Standing in front of Jujutsu High, nostalgia flooded your mind with cherished memories ; laughter, giggles, echoes of principal Yaga's scolding. The scents and images of your past enveloped you, painting a bittersweet picture. As you began to reminisce, a soft smile adorned your somewhat gloomy face.

Sukuna's voice broke the reverie, jolting you back to the present.

"One hour... that's it," he declared, grounding you in the reality of the moment.

Realizing that despite the risks of being a Jujutsu sorcerer, life then felt like heaven compared to the current disaster, a true hellfire. You nodded, all what you wanted was to hug them once more. An hour seemed more than sufficient, considering you had endured weeks of separation.

"I'll be waiting right here.. if you don't come back in one hour, I'll get in there and kill everyone before your eyes" he threatened.

You gulped, already know that he won't hesitate and would do that for real. You can't risk putting them in danger, you've been bearing all the pain for so long for them to keep them safe, so now you can't ruin it by simply being one second late...one hour is one hour.

"Understood" you muttered,

Sukuna's hold on your waist loosened, granting a temporarily liberation. It felt like a bird that had been caged for years, now experiencing the freedom to spread its wings and fly once again.

You stepped inside as the clock started ticking, countdown began. You started running, to waste no second.

Sukuna's Pov Why do I feel empty? It's just one hour; she'll return, she'll come back to me! Yet, everything seems to turn gloomy and dark without her by my side. I've lived in darkness across all timelines, for long 1000 years. But she changed it; she ignited herself, unintentionally lighting up my world. The moment she offered herself to me as an exchange for Gojo and Megumi's life, what a woman! Maybe it was the way her soul was pure, maybe it was her courage, maybe it was just for my own filthy pleasure, desires and sins. But she succeeded in making me break from the ordinary, and now all what I can think about..is her. If she was anyone else, I would have killed them at the spot, wouldn't even waste a second to negotiate, or spare them with my mercy. But Y/N,she got me wrapped around her finger, to the point that despite boiling with jealousy, and this unexpected ache that I've felt in my chest, aware of what could happen between her and Satoru in these 60 minutes, I've let her go to him, because she wanted to. Because I can't say no to her pleading eyes that drove me crazy. But one thing I won't allow, I won't allow Gojo to steal her away from me. No one can have her. Either mine, or death. End of Pov.

Panting trying to catch your breath, stomping inside, with no further warning.

"Satoru, I'm home" you said with a smile,

“Y–y/n?" they said in union.

taglist 🫶🏻:

@bellagum @darlax @saiyara05 @bontensbabygirl @aquatufana @kiki17483 @certainduckanchor @openup-yourmind @certainduckpalaceland

[crazybiaatch]

okay so quick warning for very big spoilers if you haven't been able to see the newest eps of hazbin hotel, this is gonna he talking abt a major reveal that happened in eps 5 & 6 so just be warned

so, Alastor is on someone else's leash. woah. I was shocked and had to pause the ep to collect my thoughts. One question though, who? well forst let's talk abt who it couldn't be:

- Lucifer, they've clearly never met each other and started fighting as soon as they met

- any of the Vees, it would be funny but Alastor wouldn't be passing off Vox so much, Val would be using him the same way he uses everyone else, and I can't see Velvette keeping quiet abt having the Radio Demons soul

- anyone at the hotel, they're either owned by him, way less powerful than him or Charlie, who is just too nice

- any sinner, hellborn or otherwise local that is less than an overlord

so that only leaves a few alternatives.

- Another Overlord, which could work since the only people we see making deals like the one Alastor would be in, and while Alastor is described as powerful, this is only ever by sinners and Vaggie, who don't have much of anything else to compare him too, but when Alastor is with the other Overlords they brush him off, they're respectful to him but they're not scared and they're not trying to get in his good graces, they're not acting like you would expect power hungry demons would be around someone with so much more power than him. He's more of an equal, probably less since Camilla doesn't even care about him going missing, so he 100% could have been in danger, possibly at one of the exterminations or possibly another Overlord, and entered a deal to save himself

- One of the Sins, these guys are one of the only thing in hell more powerful than the Overlords, so even if Alastor is the most powerful Overlord in hell, the Sins could take him without a sweat, so they could enter a deal easily, the only thing is, what would a sin want from him?

- One of the Royals (Goetia) the thing about this one is that we don't see many of the royals, we see Stolas, who is too preoccupied with divorcing his wife and trying to un-neglect his daughter, and his father, who could be dead for all we know. We know Stolas has a lot of siblings, but again, we don't know what's happened with them. So my idea on this one is pretty much, one of Stolas's siblings grew jealous of him and entered a deal with Alastor to take him down, but that doesn't stand on much of a leg bc it kinda depends on Alastor getting beat by someone else to be put in enough of a vulnerable position to agree to give his soul away, and I see the other Overlords or one of the Sins being able to pull off, but not one of the Goetias

- Lilith. This one seems like the most likely to me (and others) bc of their matching timeliness, Alastor has been missing for 7 years and Lilith has been off doing something for 7 years, so it would make sense for Alastor to have just been with Lilith, possibly helping her, he also went straight to Charlie when he got back instead of wrecking havoc or trying to do something dramatic to announce his return, which could have been Lilith asking him to help take care of Charlie (it also explains how protective Alastor is of her when Lucifer comes to the hotel, Lilith could have told him things abt Lucifer that made him not like him) and in the whole series he's been doing whatever Charlie wants him to do, even filming himself, which is something he absolutely hates, just to help with the hotel and make her happy, Lilith is also the second most powerful being in all of hell, so she would have the power to make that deal and also destroy Alastor, or at least threaten to destroy him with the threat holding actual water.

- The Angels. This one is a little less likely than the Lilith one, but with what was happening in ep 6 i think it's plausible. My idea is that sometime before Alastor went missing (maybe even when he first manifested), an exterminator or maybe even Sera came down to hell and threatened him on pain of death to sell his soul and do their bidding, which would be to kill as many demons as possible. that one makes the most sense if it was back when he first started his killings, since it would give him the power to do what he did and also reason beyond him being a Dramatic Bitch(tm), and it could have been afterwards too, with an Angel seeing his potential and deciding to grab him before he could get out of hand. This would also tie in with the headless angel storyline they're doing, since now Alastor has proof an Angel can be killed it gives him a chance to get out of his deal which he very obviously doesn't like.

these are just a few of my thoughts, I do think the Lilith one is the most likely but I personally think the Angel one would be more fun? it would give us yet another perspective on how evil the angels actually are (so far we have it from the residents of hell and 2 past angels as well as Emily being disillusioned by what she learnt in ep 6, so I think it would be interesting to see how they treat the people they 'own') but do take in mind that I'm operating purely on what has been posted canonically (the og pilot from 2019, the prime show and helluva boss) so I could be contradicting things viv has said so feel free to correct me if any of these are just totally impossible

[highonincense]

One thing I absolutely despise in drarry fics —and by this I mean a specific subset, not like in general cause there are many amazing fics— is the characterization of harry (and draco), the way he's an absolute fucking doormat!!!! I get it y'all are tryna portray him as a social dimwit, it can be done in a normal way without making him seem like a piece of cardboard! Are we talking about the same dude here?? You don't actually have to completely demolish a character, take away their key traits just to make the other half of the ship look better.

Let me give a pointwise description:

1. Dude stutters after every bloody sentence, like he's so overwhelmed talking to draco "smirking, smooth as butter, sardonic, sleek, godly" Malfoy who keeps insulting him every fucking second. Do you really think that harry would entertain that bullshit, especially in post-war fics!!! Like he'd just take it and not put him in his place?

2. I read this fic long ago and I don't remember the name, but good god it was unbearable. Basically the golden trio apologizes to draco for his tragic life that they were responsible for after the war? Like wtf? Why is there even a need to do that? 😭 That was too much and I stopped midway

3. Again, draco "3 OWLs" Malfoy, some supersmart / second coming of tom riddle, keeps patronizing every action of harry, the amount of times harry's intelligence is insulted? Immediate no from me, like are we still doing the whole "harry dumb mf potter is unobservant, slow, stupid, can't function without some rat hissing in his ear that he's an idiot 24/7"? Don't you think it's lame?

4. Harry has to always put up with his shitty attitude, I am all for character development, I know characters are multi dimensional and complex, and showing draco having a difficult personality is well and good, but it starts to get annoying when there's no real growth in him. I've read fics where he's absolutely despicable until the end which is covered up as him being a dickhead in general and harry "fondly" keeps up with his shit. *gag* canon harry would NEVER

5. I think it genuinely wouldn't make a difference if harry was there or not, I am not kidding or being dramatic, those fics might as well be character × y/n fics

All of this leads me to hate draco's character more! You portray him as this insufferable bastard who has a heart of gold apparently (where?) who has no real growth, shows no humility or regret or even pretends to and you think harry will put up with that?

It would be interesting if he starts out that way, works on himself and grows and changes, that would be more tolerable and interesting!

But no, he's always this annoying guy who hurls insults, keeps mocking harry or his friends every other line, you might argue it's in his character, but aren't those the traits which make him unlikeable? like those aren't cute or quirky? wouldn't it make more sense to show him grow out of it? It's really annoying

And harry, let's not go there, he's a completely new character, might as well be an oc atp, you can't even compare him to canon harry, that's how bad it is! I still haven't completely discussed it cause it's already getting long, but he's this wet bloody blanket and I can't stand it, the gryffs (except Hermione) in general are shown as some bumbling buffoons who can't differentiate between their hand and foot!! And the slytherins are all savvy, masterminds, geniuses... I really don't know whether it's admirable cause it's weird seeing them pushed into these moulds where they can only behave a certain way!

I'm so tired this is still going on like?? Why are their characters such caricatures? All of this sounds like it may have been a thing of past, but I am appalled it's still happening!!!

This is not directed at all drarry fics out there, cause there are some gorgeous fics written by amazing authors who fucking get these characters and make it about them, about their relationship and explore it in a depth and nail their characterizations without making either one of them boring. There are a good number of fics that I actually enjoy cause of the way they write drarry's characters, which makes or breaks the fic imho

[nteabodies]

Qui gon has a space youtube channel where he uploads videos of cool plants and reviews books on space botany with the occasional random footage of jedi stuff. The content is either very dry or very chaotic with shaky cam and somewhat blurry footage.

He made the account when he was a padawan after Dooku (nursing a headache from Qui Gon's latest hyperfixation) wearily asked him to channel his love for plants somewhere else at least until this migraine subsides, padawan

He realises that he actually loves making videos and chatting endlessly to a camera. His first few videos end up being 3 to 4 hours long and focuses on obscure plants and random books he found in Dookus room

The jedi Council is a little illiterate when it comes to social media (it hasnt caused any problems for the order yet so its pretty much unregulated) so QuiGon isn't actually breaking any rules when he posts videos without making them private. Many jedi do have social media accounts but they tend to use it for more professional purposes, so Qui Gon's channel slips under the radar with an average of like 5 views per video.

He continues using the channel as a botany/cute animals/philosophy/ranting outlet throughout his apprenticeship.

Once he's knighted he has less time to upload videos so his most common type of videos end up being those 20 second to 1 minute clips ft. Something Funny or Something Cool or just blurry footage with unintelligible audio.

Ofc when he gets padawans, he also posts random vids of them when he catches them in 4k doing sth stupid/cute.

By the time obi wan comes around, qui gon's space youtube channel has like, 50 short videos of feemor and xanatos doing things like petting tookas, failing spectacularly at executing a flashy ataru form, being sappy while high on painkillers, running away from qui gon as he holds a flesh-eating parasite towards them and shouts 'why are you running?' etc etc

At this point he has about 20 or so regular viewers who either think he's roleplaying a jedi or are members of the jedi order who find it hilarious (mainly Qui-Gon's friends and, for some reason, Master Yoda)

Anw the point of this is to lead to the premise of one of his videos going viral during the clone wars (possibly the one of general kenobi when he was 14 doing a backflip and landing on his face. Or the one of him sleeping while half his body is dangling outside a window. Or the one where he does this).

It's good PR for the jedi bc it shows them as slightly chaotic but peaceful people who are at their core just like everyone else (idiots).

It's memed to the extent that it reaches the eyes of the Jedi Council and Anakin who immediately like brings it to obi wan like "Master is this really you??"

Obi Wan randomly discovering this treasure trove of videos that shows so much of the person his master used to be, missing his dad so much but at the same time feeling a little betrayed that Qui Gon uploaded such embarrassing videos to a public forum where anyone could view it: you are haunting me from beyond the grave master

And the channel has both clips of Qui Gon and Obi wan as padawans, so there would definitely be fan compilation videos comparing their feral padawan energy. Obi Wan feels seen bc no one used to believe him when he told them that calm Master Jinn was actually crazier than him but now he finally has proof but then angst bc Qui Gon is not there so he can't rub his face in it :(

Anakin and ahsoka discovering that their cool and calm master used to be wilder and more feral than them before qui gon died and left him to raise a child: that's actually very sad.

The general public seeing Dooku in the bg of qui gon's padawan videos: is General Kenobi... fighting a war... against his jedi grandpa?

Anw this can go two ways: either this is just a cute thing that happened during the clone wars and everything else happened the same as canon OR it inadvertently saves the galaxy

Canon: the videos make everyone involved Feel Things but don't change their actions. The empire never gets around to banning the channel so Obi wan uses it as one of his last sources of comfort in the desert as he watches over luke. Once he reconnects with Qui-Gon's force ghost, they bond by watching old videos from the channel. Years later, Luke discovers Obi Wans old datapad and inadvertently finds out about the original viral video and the channel. It ends up being a very good reference for painting a picture of jedi life pre-empire. Luke uses it as a reference when building his jedi academy but not before spending a solid hour laughing at the padawan kenobi fail compilations

AU:

Dooku watching some of the videos and all the fluff (and possibly seeing the vlog where padawan qui gon talks about the differences between attachments and love with regards to jedi and bringing up his bond with dooku): Actually maybe I can leave the jedi order and make positive change without becoming a sith lord. Maybe I can help the jedi order without agreeing with everything they do.

Anakin watching the same video on attachments vs love and going to obi wan

Anakin: Do you love me master?

Obi wan: ???

Obi wan: You are my brother anakain??? Of course I love you??? But why are you asking me?? Are you okay?? Do you have something to confess perhaps?? Like about a senator?? A senator that has a name beginning with a p??

Anakin, panicking: Ah yes p-pa-palpatine did tell me a strange story about a wise sith lord when we went for our weekly bonding session yesterday

Obi wan: I -

Obi wan: I meant your marriage to Padme actually but wtf there is a lot to unpack there.

And anakin is just reeling from the fact that

1) obi wan loves him

2) obi wan knew about padme and didn't say anything

So he doesn't get angery when Obi wan brings the palpy matter to the jedi Council and investigates him. Then add in a few well-timed coincidences bc this is a fix it and yay palpy overthrown!!

Anakin prolly voluntarily leaves the order and becomes a happy trophy husband for Padme after a long talk with Obi wan about his future where he reevaluates his life decisions. ("Anakin you will be my brother whether or not you're in the order")

Obi wan meets Qui Gons force ghost and does get to rub it in his face that he was a less feral padawan than Qui Gon.

And they all lived happily ever after except palpatine who died angrily ever after.

[kanansdume]

I've decided that the Ahsoka show is probably at its best when the characters AREN'T SPEAKING. Which is unfortunate because it's a show that relies so much on its fun visuals and its fan service and its one-liners to do a lot of the work, and yet the characters talk so much without saying much of anything at all. Certainly nothing of any real importance or that pays off later.

I rewatched episode 5 today and was just hit by how much I genuinely loved the scene where Ahsoka goes to interact with the badly wounded clone during the Ryloth flashback sequence. It hit me when I first watched it as well and stuck with me as the best scene out of the entire episode, probably the best scene in the entire show so far. Everyone else was screaming about the Vader flickers and I'm over here obsessing over Ahsoka just silently walking over to an injured clone, sitting down to touch his hand, and the clone silently reaching over to place his hand atop hers. The whole scene probably takes place over about 20 seconds at MOST, and it's entirely without dialogue.

And it's PERFECT.

We get to just watch Ariana Greenblatt's face as she cycles through grief and pain and love for this clone whose name she may not even know or remember anymore and joy that he's still able to reach out to her to provide HER comfort when he feels her hand on his arm. We can't even see the clone's face, we're stuck looking at Ahsoka work through the emotions of this single interaction and how deeply it impacts her. It reminds us that the clones were people she knew, people she loved, people she felt responsible for protecting. These were her friends and they loved her, too. And so many of them died, while she still lives.

It lasts 20 seconds and doesn't have a single line of dialogue and it tells us SO MUCH about Ahsoka's relationship to the clones, both then and now. It tells us so much about how she feels about the war, the men she loved, and the fact that so many of them were lost, long before Order 66 happened. And she was powerless to stop any of it. We don't need dialogue to understand what she's feeling in this moment because they actually stopped to let the actor and the scene speak for itself, in the simplest possible way.

And then compare it to the scene where Ahsoka connects to the purrgil. SHE'S not speaking, but we keep cutting away from Ahsoka to listen to Jacen chattering away at Hera ("Is she going to speak to the purrgil?" "That's the idea" "Is the whale going to take her to Ezra?" "That's the hope, kid") and basically spelling out the plan and the scene for us in a way that we really did not need, especially since they have Ahsoka and Huyang basically explain it themselves later anyway. We're also cutting away to Carson Teva blathering to the Fleet Commander and stalling for time, despite the fact that we absolutely did not actually need to see that happen. So the emotion of the moment where Ahsoka is connecting with the purrgil keeps getting undercut by all of this extraneous dialogue by the other characters that is adding nothing to the plot or the scene. The additional dialogue also makes the scene last a lot longer, so it feels like Ahsoka's standing there for an age before anything happens. It's a LOT longer than the quick scene between her and the clone, but it's massively less impactful.

[fractiflos]

*scuttles over

Hey for ask game how about 5 headcanons on a What-If scenario where En unfortunately is All For One’s son?

(yeah I like En a lot I think he’s neat.)

I like En and want him to be happy. But I did this.

He was born by complete accident. AFO had only recently learned what sex was, being raised a street rat, and realized that having it was a big deal apparently. He decided to do it so he didn't look lame by society's standards. Unfortunately, he did not know a thing about protection and Miss Tayutai was too starstruck to question anything about it. When AFO heard the news that she was pregnant his first thought was to get a paternity test. His second was to think about what having a child would be like. He was actually kind of excited to be a dad because if he and Yoichi were identical twins, then the baby would also be Yoichi's baby and have his DNA. It would be like raising Yoichi again.

En was born and AFO was the father. Unfortunately, the MHA curse struck. En looked like his mom. Not a single bit of Yoichi to be found in his looks. AFO was disappointed but the baby still had Yoichi's DNA so he decided to keep it. But he was so angry about the way he looked, he killed En's mom and named him En after his ugly gray eyes, the color of smoke.

En grew up with a critical father who never admitted his own faults and loved to point out the littlest mistakes En made and make fun of him for it. And yet, any talk of leaving was immediately shut down. "Why would you leave? I only do this because I love you. I'll be lonely. I can't lose you like I lost your uncle." The uncle that En was constantly being compared to. "Look how pretty he was. Nothing like your ugly face." So En started wearing masks and the like to hide his face.

En became a very anxious perfectionist and hated his looks. Yet, there was one thing he had in common with his uncle: A love of heroes. He wanted to be one, but with how much his father made fun of his weak quirk, he knew he couldn't. Then one day, as he was walking in the park he was accosted by some villains and got so scared he lost control of his quirk. A hero saw the smoke and ran to help. Lariat. He complimented En on his quirk, the first compliment he had ever received about his quirk. He's so shocked he doesn't think and just asks if that means he can be a hero. Lariat shrugs and goes "Why not? Here, I gotta drop these guys off and then I can help you get started."

6 months later (they didn't require a lot back then) En becomes an underground hero. Naturally he keeps it a secret from his dad since he's not allowed to have a job or move out despite being 20. But AFO never paid him too much attention which allowed him to get away with it for a while. Until AFO saw him on patrol with Lariat. Now, En never knew his father was the infamous AFO. He figured he did some illegal work, but there was no way he could arrest his dad and as much as he wanted to tell someone, he just couldn't. When AFO comes out, En doesn't have time to react when he begins to battle Banjo, enraged by him having his brother's quirk and for being responsible for his son being a hero. (He jumped to conclusion on that one, having only seen them patrol together, but it's not like he's wrong.)

During the fight, it comes out that En is AFOs son and some stuff about OFA. And yet, when Banjo is dying after getting that building thrown at him, he still offers his quirk to En. He takes it, wanting to use it to honor his senpai, but he knows he can't do it then. He runs away from the scene to calm down, but he knows that he can't go home now.

Eventually, he finds someone who he thinks will make a good successor, just in time to face his dad. Only, instead of killing him, AFO tries to capture him. His son and brother in the same body, what a wonderful thing. Except he wants to do all sorts of experiments to see if he can get Yoichi to the surface without a lot of concern for En. AFO uses his spike quirk to try and pin his hand but En moves and...

Well, from here he either gets sliced in half (which leads to Nana getting the quirk and an au that mostly follows canon) or he dodges and gets captured another way, which would lead to a completely different world.