#and for the longest time he was one of few that someone else didn't suggest to me first

[ghouldump]

Hiiiii I absolutely love your work thanks for feeding us with iwtv content!!!🫶🫶🫶🫶❤️❤️

I was thinking of a lestat x bi/queer fem reader, in which they’re just cuddling and chilling as they share their past experiences with lovers with no judgement and how they both came to terms with their sexuality, just something very fluffy!

That’s just a suggestion in case you needed ideas, don’t feel pressured at all! Have a great day🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

As You Are | Lestat De Lioncourt x Reader

ෆ summary in request above ^

“You sure you okay, ma chérie, you've been awfully quiet, Lestat said, his fingertips brushing against your hip.

It was one of those rare nights, after hunting, there was nothing else to do but to spend time with each other. You both spent decades without companionship, drowning in loneliness, before meeting each other and now you treasured quality time together.

“I’m okay, today is an old friend's birthday, and I can't help thinking of her,” you told him, climbing out of bed, you grabbed the folded photo from inside of your coin purse.

“You two are a little close be friends,” he said, making you laugh.

“She said people would say that,” you smiled, folding the photo back up.

“You’ve been with a woman, this friend of yours,” he quickly realized.

“Yes, you aren't the only one who doesn't discriminate,” you laughed at how theatrical he was. Lestat had been open about his diverse tastes and history, while you were oftentimes a closed book, listening to his stories, rather than telling your own.

“How did I not know this?”

“I guess it slipped my mind, I don't talk about it, I've learned things and healed, and have no regrets,” you shrugged.

“You cannot tell me that and not elaborate…”

“Well, early 1900s, I had obviously just been turned, I tried dating around for a bit, but nothing worked out, until Helen. I always felt things towards women, but you know how things were back then, I couldn't dare express these feelings to anyone. I probably would've gotten a lobotomy,” you said, making him snicker.

“I realized if I would be here forever, I needed to come to terms with myself. Helen lived in the same apartment building, and I, of course, began to flirt with her. She was like I once was, hiding her true identity, afraid of judgment from outsiders. We were together for some time, in secret. I eventually wanted to turn her, but she was too afraid, blinded by her own internal conflict. We ultimately parted, and she went on with her life. I didn't hear from her again, until I was invited to her funeral, by her children,” you told him, he listened attentively, his softened eyes staring at your face, as he held you close.

“Oh, ma chérie”

“For the longest, I struggled with accepting who I was, questioning what was wrong with me, but I eventually could see myself healing, as time went on. I dated a few others, but none could capture my heart like her, I wouldn't allow myself to fully enjoy and give in until I met you,” you smiled, pecking his lips.

“I thought I wasn't able to love again, after my Nicky, until you came along, and I suppose things worked out perfectly,” he said, his finger brushing against your face.

“We’re one and the same”

“I agree, although it does make things more interesting knowing you also have equally eclectic taste, we’ll have to explore this scandalous side of you,” he grinned.

“What did you have in mind?” you asked, laughing at the mischievous grin on his lips.

“Nothing, for now, I just want to love you, completely and unconditionally, as you are,” he snuggled against you.

“Yes, we can invite someone except not that banchy-singing whore,” you said, hearing his thoughts, questioning if you would be open to a third joining you two in bed, from time to time.

“Thank god, I thought I would have had to beg,” he said, wrapping his arms around you, as he rolled over.

[ewanmitchellconnoisseur]

"𝑭𝒖𝒄𝒌 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆" 𝑬𝒕𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒙 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

A/N: This is part two of the Anti-Love Ettore one-shot.

Summary: Ettore mistakes a suggestion of yours as a sign that you're distancing yourself. It only gets worse when he spots you with some guy he's never seen before.

TW: Smut, Oral Sex (f receiving), fingering, tiddy sucking, lactation kink (with no lactation) p in v, creampie, bondage, vibrator play, violence

Word Count: 3k (I think this is the longest fic I've ever done lol)

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I can't remember who made the X Banner. If you know please tell me.

Your head was lying on his chest as you lazily drew shapes on his forearm over his tattoo. His hands gently rubbed your lower back as you both just lay there not needing to say any words. Just enjoying the moment.

Ettore had become fond of these moments. How calm they were. It was a big difference to how chaotic his life had always been. With you, there was only peace.

"Ettore?" As your voice reaches his ears he blinks back to reality and looks down at you. "Did you hear what I said?" He shakes his head while still rubbing your lower back.

"You should try BDSM. I think it would suit you. It would also keep you out of trouble." Ettore had heard of BDSM before but the costs alone to build a playroom was more than he had.

But that wasn't what was running through his mind right now. Why were you telling him this? He has no use for some random submissive girl when he has you. Were you getting tired of him? Did you find someone else?

You babbled on for a while about how you could help him start. Ettore didn't say a word the entire time. His brain bounced between different theories as to why you were all of a sudden interested in finding him a new fuck buddy.

Only when you moved to sit on top of him, straddling him, did he snap out of his thoughts. He looked up at you and held on to your waist.

"You ok?" He nodded. You knew he was a man of few words and expressed how he felt in other ways. His hips bucked upwards as he felt the heat radiating from your body just above his cock. It slowly hardened as Ettore thought of fucking any ideas you had of leaving him out of you.

Before he could initiate anything you kissed his cheek and got off of him saying you had to go.

To you, he was just being his normal self. You never would have imagined the turmoil going on in his head, the plans that were brewing. If only he had been honest from then about his feelings.

It could have saved you both some pain.

A day had gone by since you introduced the BDSM idea to Ettore. You had gone off to do God knows what. He assumed you were stealing stuff as you typically did in your spare time. He had calmed down slightly but his brain was still racked with thoughts of why you had brought it all up in the first place.

He managed to tell himself there was no cause for worry. That was until he tried to call you to hook up and you didn't answer. It only got worse when he texted you telling you to come over and you replied with "Can't. Im busy.".

Busy? Busy doing what? With who?

He paced around his apartment. Wondering if he should call you again. He chewed on his nails till they were too short to chew anymore. No matter how many deep breaths he took he couldn't calm himself. He had to know what you were doing.

In a matter of minutes Ettore was dressed and at the mall in a grey sweat suit with a black jacket. He had his hood up as he stalked around the local mall looking for you. He was there for about 30 minutes before he spotted you quickly walking out of a store.

A smile rose on his face when he saw you pull something out of your pocket with a smile.

See Ettore? She's just doing her typical shit.

The smile only dropped when he watched you turn around and wait for a boy to run out of the store after you. He was being chased by a security guard. You took his hand and began running as you both were in a fit of giggles.

The sight made his blood boil. He felt hot in his own skin and just wanted to crawl out. The guard gave up on chasing you both and returned to the store. Ettore began walking in the direction you both went. He needed answers. Who was this guy? Why were you holding his hand? Is he who you decided to spend your time with instead of being fucked by him?

He picked up the pace until he caught sight of the two of you heading towards one of the exits. it led towards the loading dock and was pretty much an abandoned side of the mall that barely anyone shopped in. He did his best to stay out of sight but with every step he just wanted to finally reach the two of you.

And when he finally does it changes your relationship forever. You barely have time to react as the man you are next to gets grabbed backwards by his hoodie and face-slammed into a brick wall. You scream as you see Ettore get on top of him and punch him repeatedly.

The man your with weakly tries to protect his head as Ettore continues to hit him in the head.

"Ettore stop! Get off of him!" You try to pull him off but that only redirects his anger. He stands up and shoves you. You stumble back and fall to the ground your hands scraping against the tough concrete. Ettore, driven by anger, pulls back his fist as if he is about to punch you.

And thats when he sees it.

The terror in your eyes. The tears that fall down your cheek.

The same look he saw in the eyes of the women he killed.

Seeing that look in your eyes. Your eyes... hurt him. Without knowing it you were the air he breathed. To know he had made you fear him, terrified him. He lowered his arm and ran off saying nothing else.

He doesn't remember much about what happened that night. He wakes up to his apartment trashed and can only assume his emotions got the better of him. He had sent you more messages than he could count and called you countless times. You ignored every call and message.

He didn't know where you lived considering you only ever hooked up at his place.

He had to get you to forgive him. He couldn't continue without you. He couldn't breathe without you.

He told himself that this wasn't love. That this was just fear of losing what you offered. Your wonderful pussy. The amazing sex. Thats all he's scared of losing, not you. He could care less about you.

It took him almost a week before he found out where you lived. He knew what bars you liked to hang out and started asking around. You were smart not to go out knowing he would be looking for you but eventually, you needed groceries. You stepped out to do some shopping wearing a more discreet outfit than you would usually wear.

Ettore watched from across the street as you pulled up your hood and walked towards the bus stop. He knew you would be gone a while and would give him time to do what he needed to.

You returned from shopping and carried in your grocery bags struggling a bit as the plastics pinched your fingers.

It's only when you step inside your apartment and place them on the table do you feel how the tense air. Your apartment feels different than before. You grabbed a knife from the kitchen and slowly walked towards your bedroom.

As you pushed open the door everything looked the same. You relaxed and took a deep breath.

Im just on edge. I need to relax.

"Drop it." You immediately tense as you hear his voice. You do as he says and drop the knife to the ground. "Turn around." Your heart beats in your chest, you're not scared of him, you never are, but you're scared of the confrontation. You turn around and face him.

"Ettore." He simply stares at you. When you first lay your eyes on him you notice his appearance. He doesn't look...well. His skin was pale and had dark bags under his eyes.

"You've ignored all of my calls and all my messages." He slowly takes a step forward and you respond with a step back.

"What was I supposed to say-"

"Hello, good morning, how are you? Fuck baby I don't know just talk to me-" He takes another step closer and you raise your hand.

"You beat my friend for no reason. Then you pushed-" He closes the gap between the two of you and pulls you against him.

"I didn't mean to...I...Im sorry." Ettore was not one to say im sorry. "Im sorry that I hurt you." He leaned down and kissed up your next stopping at your ear. "But im not sorry for beating that fucker up. He was touching you." He resumed kissing you while backing you up against the wall.

"He was just a friend." You want to be mad at him for what he did. You want to yell at him for being so violent but you can't.

"You ditched fucking me to hang out with him. You kept talking about this BDSM shit. You were planning on leaving me for him. I won't let you. I can't let you."

It all falls into place in your mind. He thought you were abandoning him. The realization made you smile and effectively softened your resolve. He was just scared to lose you, and this was his fucked up way of saying it.

You push him back slightly so you can see his face. Your hand runs over his cheek and he nuzzles into your hand.

"I wasn't leaving. I just thought maybe you'd like it more if...if you weren't just fucking me all the time..."

Deep down you had started to worry that over time Ettore could eventually become bored of you and even deeper down you slowly developed feelings for him. You knew he would never want a real relationship, and even if he did it wouldn't resemble the ones you see in movies. The ones you yearned for as a girl.

"I don't want no one else but you." He takes a deep breath and opens his mouth to say something but pauses every time. He leans down and kisses you cradling your face. It's softer than any kiss has ever given you. "And I don't want you to be anyone else's but mine."

You knew this was his way of saying it without saying it. He wants you to be his and he wants to be yours. Ettore watches as a smile creeps on your face and he knows you understood what he meant. He pulls you back into the kiss while walking you backwards into your room.

You end up falling on the bed and he crawls on top of you already pulling at your clothes. He undresses you while kissing every bit of newly exposed skin until you're fully naked in front of him.

He's still fully undressed and the idea makes you feel vulnerable. He has seen your body hundreds of times but you still press your legs together while your arms cover your tits.

He gently pushes a knee in between your legs opening them back up as his hands uncross your arms.

"You're beautiful." He rolls one of your nipples in his fingers while he suckles the other imagining again what it would feel like for milk to flow into his throat. The thought made him painfully hard.

He stands up for a moment and walks away before coming back. You sit up and watch as he undresses slowly before walking over to your dresser.

"I was doing some snooping earlier..." He looks over at you and smirks as his hands rest on the first drawer. You already know what it is he found and can't help but smile. He opens the drawer and pulls out your vibrator and a pair of handcuffs. He looks at you with one eyebrow raised. "Care to share why you have these."

You can't shake the smirk off of your face as he walks over.

"Move up." You do as he says and move up higher on the bed. Ettore returns above you and grabs your wrists positioning them above your head. He threads the handcuffs through one of the gaps of your headboard then locks each wrist. "You gonna be a good girl for me yeah?"

You nod as he kisses his way down in between your legs. He places a soft kiss on your clit before sucking on it gently. He looks up and watches as your mouth hangs open and your head is thrown back.

He moves on to fucking you with his tongue holding you tight as you try to squirm away. Ettore adds pushes in a finger and pumps it in and out of you at a relentless pace. His finger easily brushes that sweet spot and has your back arching off the bed.

You want to touch him and try to pull your hands but are only reminded that you're bound by the tightness of the cuffs.

He can feel you clenching around his finger and all he could do is smile against your pussy. As you cum Ettore praises you saying you did so well but he doesn't stop he asks you to cum again around his fingers and brings the vibrator to your clit as he adds another inside of you.

He doesn't stop fucking you with his fingers and the vibrator as he comes up and takes one of your nipples in his mouth while watching you. Your legs shake as you give him another orgasm, shivers running up your spine. He removes the vibrator and his fingers kiss your jaw.

"You did so good." He slides himself through your folds gathering your wetness on his tip. Instinctively you try to move away from being overstimulated but he holds you in one place. His eyebrows are knit together and his mouth hangs open as he finally pushes himself inside. "Relax for me, baby." Although it's only been a week since you've last fucked you're back to being tight from the lack of his cock keeping you stretched.

You both groan when he finally bottoms out. The hairs on the base of his cock brush against your clit only making you whimper more from the contact.

Ettore sits up and grabs onto your waist holding on as leverage so he can fuck you. He watches as a white ring forms around the base of his cock and how easily he slides into you now that you soaked. the only sounds heard are your whimpers and the wet smack of his hips against your ass.

"Fuck- please Ettore." He doesn't know what your begging for but stares at your face in pride as it's screwed with pleasure. He knows no one else could make you feel this way and it only inflates his ego more.

"Does it feel good baby?" He reaches back for the vibrator and brings it down onto your clit again. At this point, tears have formed in your eyes from how fucking good this all feels.

"It's always so good." You whimper arching your hips so he slides in deeper. He can feel your pussy spazzing around him. "Fuck fuck fuck." You draw in a short breath as another orgasm washes over you. You feel heavy and spent as Ettore removes the vibrator and comes up and kisses your neck and chest.

"One more. You can give me one more." He reaches over on your nightstand and grabs the key for the handcuffs. He unlocks the cuffs and turns you over so you're lying on top of him. "Please. Please ride me." Despite how tired your body feels from the three orgasms he has drawn out from you, you sit up and look down at him.

You lift your hips slightly and reach in between you two grabbing his cock. Ettore moans as your hands wrap around him while you line yourself up. His moan only gets louder as you sink down fully on his length.

He holds on to your tits as you bounce up and down his cock rolling both nipples in between his fingers. You do your best to set a pace you know will have him cumming in a minute but you're still so tired. Ettore notices and places both hands on your hips lifting you up and down and helping you to fuck yourself on his cock.

"Fuck!" He throws his head back as he feels the tip of his cock hit your cervix. "I love you so much." The words were out of his mouth before he could control them. And though you're not sure if he means them or if they hold the same meaning for you as they do him but it only fuels you more.

You meet his thrusts and feel him throbbing inside of you. His face is screwed in what looks more like pain than pleasure as he begs you to make him cum.

"I can't cum if you don't. Please." He circles your clit once more and tells you how much he needs it. How much he needs to feel you cumming around him, how that will tell him you love him too.

You finally do cum and fall against his chest as he keeps holding on to your hips fucking up into you, his balls slapping against your ass and the vulgar noises of your bodies connecting filling your ears before he pushes you down as far as he can forcing you there. You feel him cum deep inside you moaning loudly as 'thank you' flows repeatedly from his lips like a prayer.

He eases up slightly as he rolls over and pins you down not taking himself out of you. Your breathing evens out as he kisses you gently. A drastic contrast to how ruthlessly he just fucked you.

"I meant it. Every word." Your heart flutters at his confession. He kisses you deeply.

He knows he can't let you go. But he also knows you won't stay without that confession. Even if it was hard for him to say it he was glad he did.

You both lay there wrapped in each other's embraces. Scared but excited to see where this will take you.

Nothing could go wrong now...

....Right?

A/N: Hope you guys enjoyed this! I still have an ideal 2 additional chapters planned out. The next one is shorter but still good!

Gen Taglist: @valeskafics @thought--bubble @dixie-elocin

"Fuck Love" Taglist: @hi-eleonora @scarletbedlam @fan-goddess @qyburnsghost

[edelgarfield]

god damn it all this Aeor and Calamity lore has me liking Ludinus a lot more than I ever wanted to. I find him so fascinating and compelling as a villain, in the way that he reflects a lot of my favorite characters' flaws particularly from CR2, but CR3 in Bell's Hells at times self-defeating pursuit of power in order to win.

I'm thinking abt a couple quotes from Essek, bc he & Ludinus obviously have so much in common. By Essek's own admission, it was his inability to trust people that made his pursuit of knowledge at the cost of others so appealing, that made him lose sight of the hurt he was causing

In particular the second quote: feeling personally responsible for doing something because of your inability to trust anyone else. I think that encompasses Ludinus's ideology & motivation so well.

The idea of longevity/immortality being a barrier to intimacy is something that gets talked about with respect to elves a lot, and I think Ludinus encompasses that to its logical extreme. Ludinus is one of the last survivors who actually lived on Exandria during the Calamity. Most elves actually fucked off to the Feywild and didn't return until long after the fighting was over. Given Ludinus was a child when Aeor fell, I would assume that means his parents chose to stay on Exandria & he was born afterwards. (Which if that's the case, adds another layer to his resistance against the gods bc he was doomed to live through the war on the surface of Exandria bc of a choice his parents made before he was born.)

All the elves born at the tail end of the Calamity are dead by now, Ludinus lived at least 160ish years of it, and most of the elves born around that time would have been in the Feywild and wouldn't have the experience of seeing what happened to the world. Everyone else who survived the Calamity would have died hundreds of years ago, not to mention that only a third of the population even survived it in the first place. The thing that's saved the PCs (& Essek) time and time again is their bonds with others, having other people to support them & remind them that all the power in the world means nothing if you lose yourself in its pursuit, that there are good things in this world worth living for.

Anyone that might have had the chance to sway Ludinus from his path is long dead, either from the Calamity or old age. Liliana seems to be the only person he feels close to, but they're both bonded through their shared cause. Even other elves, the people with the longest memories, don't understand what living through the Calamity was like. They weren't there.

I know it was mostly a joke when Laudna suggested Ludinus go to therapy, but at the same time where would he go? One of the things that helps PTSD is a sense of community, feeling like there are other people who share your experience, but there isn't anyone that shares Ludinus's experience (Not to mention anything resembling a therapist on Exandria would most likely draw power from a deity, which Ludinus is understandably opposed to).

That sense of isolation is something that comes up again & again among CR PCs. CR2 is the most obvious, but it's something plenty of the CR3 characters have been through as well. Ludinus would have been alone in his trauma for hundreds of years. That's completely incomprehensible to us. He would have watched the world move on and forget something that's so deeply affected him. Any attempt to confide in someone about his anger & pain would often be met with "this is punishment for our hubris" "the gods love us" "don't question their will." The very, very few allies he had would die out over the years until one day he's the last and he would be the last for centuries more. I feel like that sense of isolation, feeling removed from the world, bottling up centuries' worth of emotion would make anyone numb. he withdraws further and further into himself bc he doesn't belong. he works for centuries at removing the gods, becoming more and more desperate as he grows older, without anyone else to provide perspective as his plans grow more and more ruthless. (i also have a theory that this loneliness is part of what makes him sympathetic to predathos but that's a separate post)

Given his age & being the last survivor of the Calamity, I think it's nearly impossible for him to connect with other people. The only thing that gives him any sense of connection or community is his crusade against the gods; he only feels connected to others through their shared pain & anger, which never allow him to move past it. He can't trust anyone bc no one else understands what the gods are capable of like he does, nobody else understands what's at stake. He's the only person remaining who does, which means he's the only one who can do what he believes needs to be done.

There's a sense of duty. He needs to eliminate the gods because he doesn't trust the future inhabitants of Exandria to be able to protect their world. He owes it to all those who've been trampled on by the gods to do what they no longer can. I think he genuinely cares about mortals & he wants to defend them from a threat that he believes only he can see, but I think he cares far more about the thousands of dead he carries on his back than anyone alive. He can't simply live a happy life bc everything that once made his life worth living is gone. He can't let go of that pain & anger and move forward. His trauma is what gives him purpose and meaning; healing from it would be a betrayal to all the people that have suffered beneath the gods.

I don't think he's wrong about the gods, but I think he's seeking freedom from the gods' control, not realizing that he's letting himself be controlled by the dead. I think it's been a very long time since he spared a thought towards actually living. Bell's Hells keeps accusing him of wanting to take the place of the gods, or wanting to be seen as a messiah, but I truly don't think that's it. I don't think he cares about what comes after, if he's even thought about it at all. I don't even think he wants to be a martyr. His goal has never been for him to live in a free world, it's to ensure that there will be a world after he's gone, forever. he thinks if he dies without securing that future, he'll have failed Exandria & all the souls that have ever lived on it.

He's been completely ruthless in his pursuit of power because to him, he is fighting for Exandria's survival. That's exactly the trap BH has fallen into in the past, pursuing power even when it hurts themselves & their friends, losing sight of the actual people they claim to be protecting. Ludinus surrounds himself with terrible people; Otohan and Trent to name two, bc he wants the power they hold without getting his hands dirty himself. but in doing so he immediately removes any possibility of emotional intimacy. the people he works with don't trust him & he doesn't trust them. the one exception is Liliana & unfortunately I think she just met him far too late.

so much of CR is about the importance of feeling connected to other people, how those connections remind us of what's truly important, and keep us grounded, how when we begin to lose sight of ourselves, it's those we're close to that remind us. I think of Caleb & Essek, they both had goals they wanted to pursue, but in finding a place to belong realized those goals wouldn't actually make them happy. Ludinus doesn't want to be happy, he wants to have a purpose, and I know I'm a bleeding heart, but I think there is something incredibly tragic in someone who can't even imagine what it would be like to live a happy life.

I think of Fjord & Percy & Imogen & Laudna & Dorian, people who nearly lost themselves in pursuit of power, but chose to turn away because living for their friends was more important that dying for the world. Ludinus is the pendulum swinging in the other direction. It's incredibly tragic bc imo his intentions are genuinely good; he's arrogant and selfish and ruthless but i think he truly does want to protect Exandria.

I think there was a point in the past where someone could have reached him & he could have chosen a different path. i don't even think he would have necessarily had to give up his goal of removing the gods. if he had other people working alongside him instead of under him, who knows what he could've come up with? if he had people to pass the torch onto once he was gone, maybe he would feel like there was time to come up with a solution besides Predathos.

But he doesn't and he can't trust anyone bc no one else believes in his cause as fervently as he does. he can't trust anyone else to make the sacrifices he's willing to make so he never tries. He denies himself the aid & perspective & closeness that comes with trusting someone and becomes further and further entrenched in his mission to remove the gods at any cost. He's the only one alive left to remember the trauma of the Calamity: he has to carry all of it because no one else can.

[arias-diaryy]

Under New Management

Nobunaga x Reader

warnings: yandere, fem reader

synopsis: Following Uvo's death, Nobunaga decides to take you in.

3.2k words / this is a reupload of an older fic from my (now deleted) old account, so it probs looks familiar. i didn't have any new fic lined up for Nobu's birthday so ur gonna have to take this, sorry!

Nobunaga closes the door to Uvo’s place behind him. The place is familiar, and it’s as if Uvogin could come back at any moment. There are a few day-old beer cans on the living room coffee table and one of his large jackets thrown over the sofa, waiting to be worn again. If he was any less jaded, he might have thought Uvogin was still alive.

The house, alas, is empty. It’s an older building on the outskirts of its nearest town. It’s one of many slightly run-down homes that are left (mostly) unoccupied in the area. It’s not derelict by any means, but it's probably seen better days. He isn’t here to judge the foundations of the house though, how there are some cracks in the wall from where the door was slammed with too much force or how there are weak spots in the floor. No, he’s here for you. 

You, who's down in the basement, are probably still waiting for Uvogin. You, whom he’s only met a handful of times, spoken to even less. He’s jerked off to you more times than he’d like to admit, something Nobunaga would have never admitted to Uvogin, not when the man was so finicky over you.

Nobunaga continues to walk through the home, a chapstick tube catching his eye on the counter. It was placed with some spare change, sunglasses that certainly belonged to Uvo and various keys. He pockets the keys, assuming he might need them later. Holding the chapstick in his hand, he examines it more closely. This was probably yours, based on the ‘Vanilla Apple” flavoring. With almost no shame and a mild sense of entitlement, he applies the chapstick to his lips. It’s like an indirect kiss. He puts that as well in his pocket.

His mind continues to linger on you as he takes his time looking around. He wonders how he’ll break the news to you, he isn’t sure what approach to take. He wonders if you’ll cry, or if you’d even believe him. You two have seldom spoken with each other, Uvo did most of the talking for you on the rare occasions you were present when Nobunaga visited. The longest conversation Nobunaga ever had with you probably didn’t even last ten minutes, and it consisted of him asking questions while you gave very short responses. Uvogin had always been in earshot. As if daring one of you (mostly Nobunaga) to say something out of line. It previously hadn’t been an issue if the two of them went after the same woman, but now all of a sudden Uvo was so uppity about if Nobu even looked at you for too long.

Nobunaga can remember feeling a sense of annoyance at your very existence in the beginning. It ebbed and flowed, but it was always consistent. The more time Uvogin spent with you, the less time Nobunaga got to spend with him. In addition to the fact that Nobu couldn’t make a suggestive joke about you without Uvogin snapping at him, it didn’t make Nobunaga particularly fond of you. He hadn’t even met you yet and already had a soured image of you. It didn’t help that it seemed like everyone else had someone to return home to, meanwhile, all Nobu had been his right hand.

The day Nobunaga did get to meet you, he still didn’t see what it was about you that had Uvogin so worked up. You were cute, sure, but he couldn’t point out anything remarkable, other than that you had particularly nice legs. Maybe whatever it was about you was something only Uvogin saw. You didn’t say anything to him, which he was fine with. You were probably just shy. Uvo joked later that you didn’t like him very much, which couldn’t have been true. Nobu hadn’t made that bad of a first impression, surely.

It was only in the coming weeks that his distaste for you would warp into something else. You were cute, and something much more tangible than the women in erotic magazines. A thought crossed his mind that he’d probably be as uptight as Uvo was about you if you were his. Maybe if Uvo wasn’t so strict about who you got to interact with, you’d give Nobunaga a chance. 

He idles about for a few minutes, a strange suspense hanging in the air that only he can sense. He wonders if you’re still down there or if you somehow escaped. Maybe you’ve withered away. He wonders if you think about him or even remember him. As he stands in front of the heavy basement door, he supposes it’s time to see what all the fuss over you was about.

-

If you had to guess, you’d say it’s been about a week since you last saw Uvo.

The basement isn’t so bad. It’s got an old television to keep you entertained. It only works half of the time, but it’s the thought that counts. There are a few blankets and the mattress you sleep on is comfortable. Uvogin left you with some water bottles and food (mostly snacks) to keep you from starving to death, though he usually wasn’t gone for more than two weeks. Even then, you were only resigned to the basement if he was going somewhere far. You never knew where he went, and it all seemed to be pretty last minute when he did go, but he always told you when he’d come back. He should have come back days ago. 

Part of you hopes to see him again. All things considered, he wasn’t the worst. If you can look past the obvious (the threats of violence if you ever stepped out of line, which you stopped doing months ago, and the kidnapping and the inability to ever leave), Uvo wasn’t so bad. He went out of his way to make sure you didn’t go hungry. He brought you gifts and anything you asked for. He made you happy.

Maybe being forced to be a violent man's live-in girlfriend for 11 months has taken a toll on your mental health. But you were alive. The few bruises he gave you were long faded. Uvogin was good to you, surely he wouldn’t abandon you in his basement now. Wouldn’t he have given you a heads-up? Had he gotten bored? Have you been too good? Maybe you should have acted out more. You haven’t been able to sleep much. Every noise would wake you up in the dead of night because of how much you wanted to see Uvogin again.

Your head perks up at the sound of the basement door slowly opening. It’s not Uvogin, it can’t be. You would have heard his heavy footsteps, and he would have announced himself somehow. Instead, you’re met with a man who is only faintly familiar to you. He’s tall with a face that’s on the gaunt side, though not outright unhealthy. His clothing doesn’t stand out, with beige pants and a green long sleeve. His most distinct feature is his hair, which is long and slightly greasy from what you can see.

“You’re still here, that’s good.” He says nonchalantly, as if you had anywhere else to go. Nobunaga’s eyes drift to the chains around your ankle. “You must have given him a lot of trouble if he had to chain you up.” He remarks, trying to ease up any tension with what was meant to be a joke. It isn’t working. You stare at him blankly, scanning his face. You’ve seen this guy before, but at the moment, his face isn’t recognizable to you. Nobunaga sighs, looking you over. You look sick, and he isn’t sure if you actually are or if it’s the unflattering lighting of the basement. Once locating the light switch, he flicks it on, and you don’t look much better. There are dark circles beneath your eyes, your lips are cracked, and your complexion is dull and lifeless.

Nobunaga comes closer, crouching down next to the mattress. He takes the chain into his hands, eyeing it over. It isn’t particularly thick or very heavy. It attaches to the wall, and there’s a cuff around your ankle to keep you from going far. He hadn’t found an obvious key in the basement, so he settles for using his strength (and nen) to simply break the metal chain without warning. The way you flinch doesn’t go unnoticed, but at least you’ll be able to walk out of here now. You scoot away from him, sitting up and against the wall rather than laying lethargically on your side. 

“Hey, come on, we’ve met before,” Nobunaga says, the discontentment in his voice thinly veiled. He fishes your chapstick out of his pants pocket. “Look, here. This is yours, isn’t it?” After a few seconds of warily staring at him, it finally clicks. It’s your kidnapper's equally strange friend, whose name you barely remembered. You tentatively take the chapstick from him, untwisting the cap, and apply some of the chapstick liberally, and there’s an awful fluttering feeling in Nobunaga’s chest.

He wonders if you’d somehow notice that he just used it minutes earlier. He averts his gaze, suddenly remembering the key ring he pocketed away. Again, without warning, he grasps your ankle, holding you in place as he tries out the different keys on the cuff. After some trying, it eventually comes off. There's a slight imprint of the cuff on your skin, but it hasn’t torn or broken your skin. 

“You’re Nobunaga.” You croak out, finally remembering his name. He grins, relief audible in his voice. “There you go, I knew you couldn’t have forgotten me.” You don’t smile back. Something must be wrong if Uvo was letting someone else get so close. Nobunaga’s gaze meets yours again, and he waits for you to speak. He’s expecting some sort of thanks for his good deeds. “Where’s Uvogin?” His expression falls slightly. Right, he forgot that you still think Uvogin is going to come home at some point.

“He’s dead.” 

There’s a heavy pause after he speaks. Nobunaga stares at you, waiting for you to emote, but you only stare back. He had hoped, expected, that if anyone else were to outwardly share in his grief it would be you. He stifles a frustrated sigh. The other members of the Spider grieved for Uvogin, nobody was thrilled about his death, Nobunaga knows that yet he can’t ignore the feeling that none of them truly understood. He chalks it up to shock, surely you’ll properly react to Uvogin’s death in the coming days.

The man wastes little time, not wanting to sit around in the dusty basement any longer. Without warning, Nobunaga takes you by the wrist and pulls you up, forcing you to stand on wobbly legs. He’s all too eager to have you lean on him for support as you get used to walking again. The days of being chained to the ground hadn’t done your muscles any good. “Come on, let’s get you out of here.”

Nobunaga’s words replay in your mind, yet they never truly stick. For half of a second, you’re relieved that your kidnapper is dead. Not arrested, dead. On the other hand, you’re now left with an equally dangerous man. What exactly was going to happen to you now? You weren’t clueless about Uvogin’s crimes, far from it. Uvogin boasted about the stealing and killing he did. At first, you thought it was a scare tactic, something to keep you from acting out, but he was truly proud of his proclivity for violence. Would you be killed? Surely the Troupe wouldn’t just let you go, it’d never be that easy.

As if Nobunaga could see the cogs turning in your mind, he speaks up again. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you from now on.” His voice takes a softer tone, trying to be reassuring. Each step up and out of the basement only makes the pit in your stomach deeper, to the point where you’re starting to feel sick.

Nobunaga barely picks up on your inner turmoil past what’s written all over your face. In his mind, him coming for you should be a great relief (and in a way, it is. You might have withered away in the basement if nobody bothered to come for you). Aside from the obvious fact that he can't let you go free, he doubts you’d be okay on your own at this point.

You’ve been dependent on Uvogin for anything like food or attention for nearly a year. As far as Nobunaga is concerned, you wouldn’t do well if you were thrown back into the real world and forced to take care of yourself. You might as well be a bird that’s had its wings clipped. Besides, it’s not like anyone else in the Troupe was going to take you in. Some of the other members had their own partners to occupy themselves with, Feitan even suggested outright killing you since you probably knew too much about the Troupe. It was only right that Nobunaga got to have you, he was the only one who was willing to anyway.

Besides, Chrollo did say that he could make the final decision about what happens to you.

He gets lost in his own thoughts; so caught up in his fantasies about his soon-to-be domestic life with you, that he almost doesn’t notice the way you dig your heels into the ground once he’s got you out of the basement and back on floor level. Nobunaga looks back at you, the corners of his lips twitching downward. 

“Come on, it’s fine. I told you that you’re safe with me.” He says, an impatient edge to his voice as he continues his firm hold of your wrist. “Do you want to bring some of your things with you?” Nobunaga says it as if he’s extending an olive branch. Your eyebrows furrow in confusion and you blink at him. “What?” “We aren’t going to be staying here.” Nobunaga says like it’s obvious. “You’re coming home with me.”

The apartment is quiet, save for the new pitter-patter of rain outside. You stand there idly, watching Nobunaga go through your and Uvogin’s belongings in the bedroom you used to share with Uvo. What right did he have to put his hands on your things? He shouldn’t be here, you think. You hold your tongue, the words not coming easy to you. You don’t attempt to help him or give any input on what clothes you want to take and what you want to leave behind. 

“I don’t believe you.” You say abruptly, still standing in the doorway. Nobunaga goes through the closet with his back to you, looking for a backpack or spare luggage. For half of a second, he doesn’t know what you’re talking about. “Are you sure he’s dead?” You ask, which answers the question that was on the tip of his tongue. His expression falters slightly, but he doesn’t turn to meet your gaze. “I’m positive.” Nobunaga says with a strange finality to his tone.

He’s found a decent backpack now, more focused on deciding what belongings of yours to bring and which to leave behind. As far as he’s concerned, you two will have all the time in the world to talk about Uvogin once Nobunaga just gets you back to his place. It doesn’t even cross his mind that you wouldn’t be 100% thrilled at the prospect of being transferred over to his care.

You aren’t willing to drop the conversation topic though. You don’t want to believe Uvogin is gone, but there’s no way he’d willingly hand you over to this guy, right? “How? How did he die?” You press for answers, wondering if this is some prank. Nobunaga sighs, still not bothering to turn back to face you. “We can talk about that later.”

He says, taking your clothes out of the room’s dresser and putting them in the backpack. “You’re probably hungry. Why don’t you go get yourself something to eat? I’ll finish up here.” He says dismissively, effectively shooing you off. You tentatively leave the bedroom doorway after about a minute of silence, surprised that Nobunaga is so easily letting you out of his sight.

Wandering over to the kitchen, you numbly go about making yourself something to eat. It feels like muscle memory at this point, you’re so used to fixing up a sandwich for Uvogin. Today, though, most of the ingredients you’d usually use aren’t at your disposal. The lunch meat that was in the refrigerator expired last week, and there’s no cheese left. All you’re able to come up with is a sandwich with mayonnaise and some tomato slices.

You eat slowly, your appetite diminished from the turn of events and from how bland your sandwich is. Your eyes shift to the front door, and you can just barely hear Nobunaga back in Uvo’s bedroom. Maybe if you timed it right, you could get out of here. God knew if the front door was locked, but if you didn’t at least try, then you’d never know. You can hear the rain outside more clearly now. You’d be risking getting sick by running out in the rain, but that’s a small price to pay for freedom.

What would you even do, though? Where could you go that the Troupe wouldn’t follow? By the time you gather the nerve to take a few steps out of the kitchen, Nobu’s finished packing. “Do you feel better after eating something?” He asks, his voice catching you by surprise. He doesn’t comment on the quality of your sandwich. You choose not to answer him.

The rain picks up, now it’s impossible to treat it as a soothing white noise. It’s loud and you can hear the roaring winds with it. “I guess we can just stay here until the rain dies down.” Nobunaga proposes, and he motions for you to follow him. He sits on one of the two couches in Uvo’s living room, expecting you to sit next to him. You take your seat on the second couch, and Nobunaga’s able to hide his disappointment well enough.

He takes the remote and turns the television on, keeping the volume low. The news channel only talks about the current storm, it seems like you’ll both be stuck here for at least a few more hours. You focus on the news reporter, not wanting to look at Nobunaga. You can feel his staring, you know he’s waiting for you to talk to him. 

“What’s going to happen to me?” You finally break the silence, and Nobunaga seems just about amused at your inquiry. “I told you, I’m going to be taking care of you from now on.” He says it slowly, as if you didn’t understand him the first time.

His answer is too vague for you to do anything with, or maybe it’s the brain fog from not eating much in these past days. Nobunaga continues to look at you as if you were a beloved houseplant while you think over what he’s said. After a long pause, you finally respond. “I want to go home.” Once again, his smile falters and his voice returns to a more neutral one. “That isn’t going to happen. Your best option is to come just with me.” 

Nobunaga waits for you to say something, to give any indication that you at least understand your circumstances. You don’t though, rather you choose to pretend that you’re invested in anything the news anchor is saying. He’s confident that you’ll come around, though; it’s not like you have anyone else to rely on. 

[moonliteve]

Headcanons for the early days of the deadly alliance

a second deadly alliance hc post has hit the hourglass......highly suggest u read my previous post about their past before reading this one!

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

shang tsung was surprised to see that damashi had found someone else to be apart of their scheme to take over the realms

he was a bit upset at first

does that mean i have to share the fruits of my labor? he thought to himself

quan chi, who was still kind of dazed by the whole stunt damashi pulled back in the mines, doesn't say much

he nods, quietly mumbles formalities and fumbles with his hands quite a lot

damashi tells shang they must work together in order to rule

shang was a bit baffled at the notion at first- the man before him who barely spoke and was covered in dirt and grime was supposed to help them somehow?

to which damashi gets a bit angry with shang, he explains the innate magic he possesses and his potential

"you would dare question me, shang tsung?"

immediately shuts down any protesting from him. damashi is his benefactor after all. surely he knows what's best for them

so fine. he'll try and work with the newcomer

the first few months did not go well AT ALL LMAO quan chi wasn't very talkative and he always practiced magic by himself

shang was always the one trying to initiate conversations and secretly observed the other sorcerer practicing

little did he know quan chi did the same

he's. still a bit nervous about approaching shang directly. since he was the later one to join and train under damashi's guidance he felt like his magic was subpar of shang's

he did appreciate the space shang gave him tho. he just needed some time by himself since now that he was out of the mines he was able to do whatever he wanted

day and night he would bury himself in books about all sorts of things, but he took a liking to architecture, biology and different kinds of magic- especially forbidden magic but he wasn't sure if he should be dabbling in that until damashi learnt about his interest in darker magic, that's when he started fully enabling him to practice netherrealm magic

it wasn't until sometime after that did quan chi ask shang for help for the first time

shang was more than happy to help to quan chi's surprise, he didn't think the other sorcerer would be as open as he would be atm

"it would benefit us to have a good relationship, quan chi. after all, any alliance that aids us with our plans is one worth having, is it not?"

he was glad that shang seemed to like him

he thought for the longest time just from first impressions that shang still disliked him, but they seem to be getting along well now

and this made quan chi willing to open up more to shang as well

happy days :)

the three of them were stationed at an abandoned outpost in a remote area, damashi would be the one helping them gather whatever they needed since he could shapeshift and he didn't want any of them to be under the rada

it wasn't anything fancy but they had what they needed

shang had a shitty little basement where he did his experiments, also where he kept syzoth in

quan chi didn't get to see the basement until shang decided to give him a tour. he had always wondered where shang was most of the time when it was mostly damashi who went outside

sure quan chi was shocked at first seeing all of shang's creations. but he wasn't one to judge

he knew shang came from awful conditions as well, they've both been mistreated by everyone around them so why couldn't they do the same?

plus the experiments intrigued him immensely

it was after shang showed him his basement did quan chi elaborately plan on building him a proper vivisection chamber

he wanted to show his gratitude somehow. along with damashi shang has also helped him a lot with practicing his magic

around the same time they had gotten insider info from damashi that the heir to the throne has tarkat

and with how skilled shang was at persuasion and sweet talking, they easily landed a place in outworld's court in no time with the promise of a suppressor/cure for the disease

they transferred their workspace to the laboratory that was provided to him, which was WAYY nicer than what they had before, just the look of it gave others a good impression of shang: a diligent scientist who was neat and efficient

with quan chi's architectural knowledge they built the vivisection chamber underneath the laboratory. shang planned out the whole facility and what he wanted to include while quan chi mainly did the construction since he was familiar with this kind of work, shang even created new specimens for a few extra hands

[isa-ghost]

was reading through your q!phil hc masterpost and was wondering if you could add any of your codebreakers/etoilza headcanons into the fray…? :3

YESSSS I CAN'T BELIEVE IT TOOK THIS LONG TO GET ASKED /LH

qPhil headcanons masterlist

RESTATES for my and your convenience (heads up, there are a few suggestive/mildly explicit mentions!!):

--He's FWB with Etoiles. Extremely QPR, Etoiles is an aro king --He and Phil started out as friends and that has Barely changed if at all, but sparring matches get a little too homoerotic sometimes and neither of them can resist the other when they're popping off extra hard. Things have. Escalated a few times. If yknow what I mean. Of all Phil's harem members polycule partners, he & Etoiles have absolutely ZERO emotional investment in the Spicy(tm) things they do together. It's simply a very intimate way of showing each other their respect & admiration for the other. What they have going on is a "*spanks you* good game, let's hit the showers team" kinda deal. They're the type of mfs to finish in bed then shake hands like "gg." Casual sex is >>>> to these two, but it happens waaay less between them than it did Phil & Fit, Fitza was habitual (pre-Pac). Codebreakers is a once in a while thing --Etoiles has 100% asked Phil who fucks the best out of the polycule bc like everything else, it's a competition & he Must win, he Must have the best dick game. This amuses Phil very much --Phil is attracted to Etoiles the same way he's attracted to Fit, HOWEVER, the reasoning is different. Etoiles has raw skill and talent, but it's the way he wields it and demonstrates it that makes Phil wanna act up. Also Etoiles is fucking hilarious. Who can resist a good sense of humor? Those dramatics make Phil swoon --Etoiles is one of the people who is best at catching Phil's Tells for when something is wrong --Etoiles is one of few people who can convince (or goad) Phil into doing something he normally wouldn't, especially if he's drunk --Speaking of Phil being drunk around Etoiles, the way he can still absolutely body someone or snipe smth from miles away makes Etoiles want to kiss him stupid --Etoiles left a scar on Phil's back during Purgatory when he killed him Day 1. Phil didn't know for the longest time, but it took him a while to show him his wings after that. --Phil was genuinely afraid of Etoiles (& Fit) for a while after Purgatory --Sometimes Phil's laughs and startled yelps sound almost like squawks. Also his hiccups. It's very rare, but whenever it happens, he gets teased for it. Especially by Etoiles. --Phil goes back and forth on gifting one of his shed feathers to Etoiles --Technically all of the Polycule vs Ender King hcs apply to Etoiles in some way --Phil could listen to Etoiles teach him about French culture for hours

And now the new stuff :D

Etoiles's dramatics can get Phil in tears laughing. His sides and stomach will hurt before it's over, and Etoiles can go on for MINUTES. Sometimes he'll keep going purely because it has Phil dying so hard and he loves seeing what a kick Phil gets out of it

Etoiles is (playfully) salty that Phil is such a My Kids Come First kinda guy bc GOD does he want Phil to be down to do dangerous pvp and dungeon busting shit without the "euuu we gotta make sure it's safe" aspect more often. He wants that Angel of Death. Etoiles is the #1 Dadza (Derogatory) islander /lh

See, Fitza is more explicit and deadass about their,, Time together. Codebreakers is more subtle. Yknow that "media literacy is knowing when something that isn't gay sex is gay sex" post? That's Codebreakers. Sparring, dungeon busting, whatever high-risk high-exertion thing they're doing together. That.

It should go without saying how down Etoiles would be to throw hands with Ender King. It would be the most exhilarating fight he's ever had

Phil's still lowkey lost about the whole resistance thing. And schedules lately have not been kind to the two of them, so he hasn't had a chance to talk about it with Etoiles as extensively about it as he'd like to

Btw he's secretly concerned as hell smth bad is gonna happen to Etoiles if more of his body becomes corrupted by code :)

They 100% refer back to the time Etoiles said this regularly, and similar things like it. The same can be said for Fitza but my god the extent to which these two are more than willing to kill for each other. OUGH.

Phil does not realize how much pent up stress and emotion he can vent out via sparring or hitting something really fucking hard. Etoiles is going to fix that one day.

Phil's Etoiles impression has made Etoiles attempt to learn how to mimic Phil in retaliation but he cannot for the life of him get the hang of Phil's fuckass accent. Geordies stay winning to this man's dismay

Etoiles is frustratingly yet fascinatingly hard for Phil to clock sometimes. It's difficult to gauge exactly how he's feeling or what he's thinking. And yet as inconvenient that can be sometimes, something about it is incredibly attractive to Phil at the same time. Which is funny because unpredictability is usually not something his survivalist brain would like. Something about how he trusts Etoiles and therefore his being a wildcard is not so scary,,

Etoiles 🤝🏻 Chayanne - Wanting Phil to take them on a flight

I don't know if I'd call Etoiles an anarchist the same way I would Phil, but either way he is SO DOWN to fuck with the Feds if it entails any kind of pvp or the need to be geared up

Ok listen I have to call back to the gay sex subtext thing. Things that are more sex than gay sex to Codebreakers: Sparring, adrenaline, battles of wit, flexing powerful gear, thinking too much about what an absolute potential killing machine the other is, watching one another be in The Zone during a fight

Phil has more physical strength than skill with weapons and Etoiles has more skill with weapons than physical strength. Ok now imagine that while they're in a 2v# fight

I would not put it past Etoiles to pull a Missa and say smth wildly out of pocket and suggestive so fast in French that Phil doesn't catch it.

[junnieverse]

BEST PART (PART TWO) ➳ P. JONGSEONG

➙ synopsis: after a trip down memory lane and a 'coincidental' run in with your ex after moving back home, you thought you would be able to move on but sparks seemingly started flying once again between you and jay.

pairing: park jongseong x gn!reader

genre: fluff, friends to lovers to exes to lovers (again) au

word count: 1.3k

request: " I almost cried reading Best Part, may I request a part 2 with a happy ending?? "

warnings: not proofread

a/n: I had initially wanted to leave this as a oneshot with a bittersweet ending but because you so kindly asked, here it is anon, enjoy :)

a/n (2): please be sure to read part one [ here ]

You were finally back home after being overseas and for the past two weeks you've been settling back in into your new apartment and catching up with your friends and family.

It felt great to be back and seeing everyone you love in person again but after the day of your trip going through your box of keepsakes, you would catch yourself thinking about Jay once in awhile wondering how and where he was.

Although a big part of you also knew maybe it was best not to see him because you wanted to, no, needed to move on from him and start a new page in your book called life.

Your new apartment still needed some decorating with a personal touch and you thought adding a few vinyl pieces could make your space feel more like home.

Walking into the old music shop you had been introduced to by Jay in the past, you kindly greet the store owner in the front and begin to browse through the various vinyls picking out some you wanted to get.

The store bell rung alerting the owner and you, seeing as you were currently the only customer, that someone else had come in.

You had obviously paid no mind to this simply paying attention to this box of vinyls looking for a new album.

"(Y/n)... is that you?"

Turning your head you immediately recognise the voice you'd missed but also wanted to forget for the longest time.

"Jay... h-hi." you say weakly as your voice cracked.

It felt as thought your entire world was crashing down and in that moment you were just holding back tears and wanted the ground to swallow you whole.

"How've you been, it's great to see you again. When did you get back?" he asks calmly trying to make small talk but little did you know his heart was beating uncontrollably fast.

"Uhm yeah haha. I've been good I guess. Got back about two weeks ago so I've just been settling in." you tell him wanting to run away.

"It was nice to see you too but I have to uhh... unpack some of my other things back home." you excuse yourself avoiding eye contact with him fiddling with your fingers nervously.

Just as you turned around to leave to go pay for the vinyls you picked out, Jay stops you gently grabbing your wrist and you notice a particularly familiar bracelet on his wrist.

"I hope it's okay if I message you again if you don't mind... maybe we can catch up over a coffee sometime." he suggests letting go of your arm and scratching the back of his neck nervously.

"Y-you still have my number..?" you ask him suprised by this.

"Yeah. I kept them... you know just in case." he said smiling sheepishly.

"Oh uhm, okay then, you can text me. I'll see you soon then."

Your heart and mind were both racing at this point.

You didn't know whether it was the right move to let Jay back into your life but having met him here again has to be some sort of sign right?

Fate?

And the bracelet you made him, not only had you both broken up but he was still wearing it too...

You plop down onto your couch, after arriving home, letting out a deep sigh trying to figure out how your life suddenly took an entire 180.

Jay did in fact text you that night and talking to him again brought back so many emotions you'd tried so hard to let go of.

You felt like a giddy high schooler experiencing her first love all over again.

You both had agreed to meet at a cafe not far from where you lived the following Saturday and you were quite nervous.

Seeing Jay again after so long only proved to you that you were still undoubtedly in love with him and you were secretly hoping he was too.

Walking into the cafe that afternoon, you catch Jay sitting across a table near the window looking beautiful as the sun hit him at the best angle making his skin glisten.

"Hey Jay." you greet him about to sit down but before that he abruptly pulls you in for a hug.

You feel yourself melting in his embrace taking a whiff of the vanilla scent you missed still proceeding to hug him back despite how awkward you felt.

"It's great to see you again, thank you for agreeing to this." he says pulling away first as he pulled out your chair to let you sit as you thanked him taking your seat.

"Wow, this place sure has changed, felt like just yesterday we were here on one of our dates." you say looking around admiring the new interior of the place as you reminisced about the past.

"Yeah, it feels good to be back here with you, it didn't feel the same coming alone." he admits shyly as a waiter suddenly places your drinks and food down.

"Why am I not suprised, you still remember my go-to order." you say trying to hide your smile as Jay chuckles.

"I wanted to make a good impression. Although I was worries maybe it might have changed, glad it didn't." he says feeling relieved watching you enjoy your food.

"So how was it studying overseas, anything memorable?" he asks trying to make conversation.

You were glad Jay was able to make you feel comfortable, it felt like talking to an old friend and catching up.

You both then exchanged stories of what has been going on for these past two years you'd been away from each other and yet, you hadn't picked up any romance in his story.

"So you didn't meet anyone while I was gone..?" you ask clearing your throat.

"I wasn't really interested in anyone. Plus I'm still I love with y-" he stops himself realising what he just said as your eyes widen.

"I-I'm so sorry, uh, I don't want to put you in a difficult position. I completely get it if you've moved on-" he rambles and you stop him trying to calm him down by laying your hand on his across the table.

"It's okay Jay, I feel the same way." you admit as his ears turn red and he had the biggest smile on his face.

It felt so relieving being able to finally get that out to him and even better to know he felt the same way.

You both then spent the entire day catching up more and visiting old places you'd go to making new memories there.

"Thank you for today, I had a great time." you tell Jay as you stop in front of your door both your hands in his as you gently sway them.

"Wait uhm, I actually have something for you." he says gently rubbing your hands with the pad of his thumb letting go briefly handing you the small letter from the inside pocket of his jacket.

"Oh, thank you." you accept the letting wondering what it was.

"But open it only once you're inside and I've left." he says smiling shyly.

"Okay Jay, goodnight." you tell him nodding in understanding.

Letting go of his hands, not really wanting to though, you decide to make the first move planting a short peck on his cheek leaving Jay in awe as you went inside.

You look at the letter once more opening it and reading it's content feeling yourself about to burst into tears.

At the end of the letter it read:

'Day 01: I love your presence, no matter how much time passes, I still feel myself loving you more and more and now we can finally start over together.'

He still remembered the letters, you thought to yourself with the biggest smile.

Maybe things would work out just fine.

[pyramid-of-starrs]

seriously I'm so interested in your story about vampire minho and biting likeeee cannot wait ❣️

The Mansion in the woods

Kinktober request: 5 Vampire Leeknow, Biting

Pairing: Vampire LeeKnow x afab reader

Summary: You decided to take a scary camping trip with your friends and end up exploring the mansion in the woods. You find a ring that changes the entire course of your life.

Word Count: 3.0K

Kink: Biting

Warning: Biting, blood, fangs, unprotected sex

A/N: I was on vacation but I'm back lol, this isn't great but enjoy!

Minors dni

"Okay Y/N you're next, truth or dare?" I.N asked as he took a swig of his beer and asked as the fire cracked louder, the cold fall winds blew but the alcohol and blazing campfire kept you and your friends warm. The sweater given to you by your crush Han also kept you pretty cozy. You and a few of your friends decided to do a random camping trip this fall and when your best friend Yuna told you that Han and his friends would be there you were all in. After a long day of failed fishing and hiking you and your friends ate then the boys made a fire for everyone to sit around, a few shots and beers later you all started playing truth or dare, Chan having to jump in the freezing river naked and Lia having to tell the truth about her and Felix, now it was your turn.

"Dare." You answered trying to seem cool for everyone.

"Hmm... I dare you to spend the night at that creepy mansion in the woods." Right, the whole reason you were there in the first place, Changbin had heard a rumor about this older mansion deep in the woods and suggested that the group all go visit it. Yeji and a few of the other girls said it would be too scary, so the group landed on just camping nearby.

"By herself ?? Nah man pick something else." Han interjected, it made your face hot the way he jumped in to protect you.

"Then you go with her bodyguard Han." Chan said in a mocking tone.

"Why don't you go since you're the one suggesting it." Ryujin jumped in, everyone started to argue back and forth then you spoke up.

"Why don't we all go, it could be like a test of courage to see who can stay the longest, that was originally supposed to be the point of this trip anyways right?" when you finished talking everyone looked around at each other.

...

After about a 15 minute walk the group made it, everyone stood in front of the abandoned home after all the boys worked together to pry the mansions rusted gates open.

"Well... ladies first." Seungmin said then Changbin punched him in the arm.

"Come on guys, it can't be that bad right?" Hyunjin said looking at everyone hoping someone would agree. After much hesitation the group finally entered the house. The foyer was dusty but overall, the house was actually in much better shape than you thought it would be outside of the dust, vines and cobwebs. Everyone ventured deeper into the home, eventually everyone split up into their own groups, your heart was racing from fear but also because now you were alone with Han.

"Stay behind me Y/N, here hold my hand." Han reached his hand back for you to grab it as you both continued to walk but you tripped over a deep crack in the floor and fell on top of him instead. That's how you ended up here on top of your crush, both of you just gazing at each other.

"S-sorry, I tripped." You stuttered out, your brain started to short circuit.

"Y/N I.N told me you liked me, is that true?" he looked directly into your eyes and your face was flushed.

"Y-yeah."

Han wasted no time after your confirmation and kissed you, once you were over your state of shock you kissed him back, leaning deeper into him, you didn't think your first time with Han would be on the dirty floor of a possibly haunted mansion but the way he was gripping your ass and his tongue was exploring your mouth who knows. As the kiss continued the door to the room flew open and it startled the both of you, you looked back to see Chan with the group of your friends.

"See, I told ya'll they were fucking not killed by a ghost." Seungmin said, embarrassment written all over your face. You got up and helped Han up on the way up.

"Well, I'm so glad you two were in here getting chummy, come on lets go Ryujin fell and twisted her ankle, so we have to take her back to base camp." Chan said, you looked over to see Changbin holding Ryujin on his back. The group exited the room and left you and Han there.

“Let's head back then." He looked at you and smiled, while on your way out you saw a something bling in the corner of your eye under one of the chairs in the room, as Han continued out the room you ran over to investigate, it was a ring with a dark purple jewel in the middle, something about it was so alluring. You picked it up and it was almost like a voice telling you to put the ring on, you slid it onto your ring finger, and it fit perfectly, suddenly the rooms temperature drastically dropped, before you could acknowledge it Han called your name and you left.

...

It's been a week since the camping trip and everything was back to normal, you hadn't talk to Han about the kiss but honestly that was the last thing on your mind right now. You have barely been able to sleep since that day, always feeling like someone is watching you in the distance even when you are home alone or in your room, hearing a very random yet familiar voice in your head trying to tell you something and you keep having dreams about a man, a very handsome man that you never met before. The dream would be about you in the house in the forest, when you walked in the man just stood there with beautiful silver hair and gorgeous red eyes, you know you've never met this man before yet his aura felt so familiar, every time you tried to get closer to him you were awaken from your sleep. Later that night you decided that tonight would be the night that you would confront the man in your dreams. You laid down for bed and there you were, back in the forest standing in front of the abandoned mansion, when you walked through the doors you saw him standing at the top of the stairs looking down at you.

"W-who are you?" you yelled out, however that man didn't respond, instead he continued to watch you with a grin on his face.

"What do you want? Are you the one that's been watching me ?" again no response.

"Do you know me?" he slightly giggled at your question and stopped toying with you.

"Come back to see me if you want me to answer your questions my love." He walked away, his figure disappearing into the dark hallways of the mansion, before you could ask any more you were woken up, you were drenched in sweat and your mouth was dry, you needed to find out who this mystery man was.

...

You couldn't wait anymore and took a cold shower to wash off your sweat then got dressed and headed to the woods. You found yourself standing in front of the mansion door, you pushed the old door open and entered the foyer like in your dreams. You stood in the middle of the room and looked around to find no one but the room was chilled, you shivered and flashed your light around the room to find nothing.

"Hello?" you yelled out, no response but there was a whisper.

"Come to me my love..." You heard the voice echo, it came from up the stairs. You walked up the stairs, you felt beckoned to the master bedroom, you could see a light coming from under the door. You entered the bedroom, it was a decorated room with a large bed with red and black sheets and a comforter, the room with had electricity and was the only part of the house that was warm.

"Hello?" you called out again, that when the door to the connected bathroom open, steam seeped out and a man with a towel on came out. He had another towel to dry his wet hair, he tossed it to the side then gripped the towel sitting on his waist.

"You've finally arrived my love." the man’s cat like sharp eyes met yours and it made your heart skip a beat.

"Wh-who are you?" you asked hesitantly.

The man walked over to you, he stopped just in front of you, the room got cold, but you could feel the heat of his damp body. You looked down as your face started to heat up, he placed his fingers on your chin and lifted your face.

"Your heart, mind and body didn't tell you beloved ? I am the man of your dreams."

Thats when your eyes got wide, and you darted your eyes to his.

"It's you... you're the guy from my dreams, how? Why? What are y-" before you could spew anymore questions, he silenced you by kissing your lips. Though the kiss caught you off guard you didn't stop him at first since the kiss felt warm and welcoming, this wasn't like the kiss you shared with Han, for some reason this had meaning. Eventually you pushed off of him, his body stayed firm, and you took steps back.

"What are you doing?!" you demanded an answer, the man giggled at you.

"I guess I'll introduce myself, I am Minho, the owner of this house and your fiancé." as he talked, you lifted your eyebrow at the last part.

"Fiancé???" you questioned, and he smiled.

"Yes my love, fiancé, the ring you put on that you found in our home, it's an enchanted item I brought with me from home, it's meant to only be able to be worn by my soulmate, meaning only my true love can wear it, Truthfully I lost it years ago and gave up on finding love. I thought I was damned to roam this world alone for an eternity, that is until you came along and found it. Once you slipped it onto your lovely finger, we became soul bonded." He moved his hand from your chin to cup you hand bring it to his lips to kiss the ring, the beautiful purple jewel on the ring glowed for a moment and your heart started to beat faster.

"Wait, what do you mean for eternity... what are you?" Minho knew the question would come up at some point but he was surprised you caught on so fast, many humans can't tell he isn't one of them, instead of answering you he flashed his red eyes and open his mouth slightly, his k9 teeth began to grow into fangs and his nails grew into sharp talons. You stepped back a bit to drink in his slightly different appearance.

"Oh my god so you're saying accidentally soul bonded myself to a fucking vampire?" you said as you started to panic.

" Well, I'm old fashioned and prefer the name Nosferatu but yes vampire works as well. It's funny when I lured you and your friends to my manor my only intention was to drain you all but finding you, my love, was the ultimate outcome, I'll even forgive you for kissing that peasant human boy." His teeth and nails reverted back to normal, and he walked over to the bed to sit down.

"Right, Han... I've been so focused on thinking about you that I haven't went to see him... so, what happens now?" You questioned.

"Well, before we can marry, I have to turn you so we can spend our lives together." once he finished, he waved his hand for you to come closer, so you walked over to him.

"How would you do that, do you just bite me?" He smiled at you once you finished your question.

"Yes, but don't worry." He grabbed your wrist and pulled you into his lap, he crossed his hands over your waist and placed his lips on your neck, you were both facing the same direction so you couldn't see what he was doing which made you feel shy. "I'll make this fun for both of us."

Minho reached his hand into your pants and slowly ran his fingers over your panty covered clit, a soft moan left your lips as his other hand reached for your breast and began to gently massage your fleshy mound. You leaned your head back onto his shoulder exposing you beautiful neck to him, a devious smile flashed on his face. you had your eyes closed then you felt a sting sensation on your neck and a feeling of liquid running down, you yelped at the pain but the sensation felt amazing, Minho had sunk his teeth into you, he removed his fangs from your neck and he started to lick up the blood, before you could enjoy the feeling of his tongue fully a burning sensation rushed through your body.

"Ah, Minho... I feel so hot." you said as you felt your body heating up and becoming more sensitive, suddenly the feeling of his fangs touching you and was driving you crazy.

"Don't worry beautiful, that’s just my venom entering your blood stream, I have to bite you a few more times so you can be nice and full of me." once he finished his moved his hands from your core to your waistband to inch your panty and pants off, you helped him because you wanted him, right now. Once your pants were off you spread your legs wide for him, he moved his fingers back to your core, you hadn't noticed how wet you were for him as he slid his 2 fingers into you with ease. Your moans could be heard throughout the empty mansion as he continued to work his digits in and out of your needy cunt and his tongue danced around the new holes on your neck until he kissed his way to your shoulder blade. The pace of his fingers sped up, your moans getting louder as you felt your climax on the rise, your hips bucked as you felt his pipe hard length growing under his towel, he detached his lips from your shoulder.

"Cum for me my love." He continued to pump his fingers into you, as you focused on how amazing his fast pace felt, you felt him bite into your shoulder, you yelled out a string of moans feeling your shoulder throb with pain as his fangs dug deep into you. You covered his fingers in cum as he pulled them out slowly and brought them to your lips, he didn't need to say anything you opened wide and took his digits into your hot mouth as you sucked all of your slick off of them, he popped his fingers from your mouth and you huffed and puffed heavily. You had never felt this way before, your entire body was hot like you had a fever, yet you were shivering, all you wanted was Minho, he was the only thing on your mind, the only want.

"Please, Minho, please fuck me, I need you so bad, I need your dick in me please." you started to beg, a tear sat at the corner of your eyes as you continued to buck your hips, your pussy was leaking and needy still.

"Of course my queen, I'll fill you up with my venom and my cum." he gently laid your hot body back onto the bed and crawled up to you, he clicked the bedside lamp off and removed the remainder of your clothes along with his towel, he couldn't help but to stop and stare as he looked over your body as it shined in the moonlight. "How was I so lucky to find such a beautiful wife." Your face heated up as he complimented you.

"When I take you home one day everyone will be so jealous of my beautiful wife, so perfect and made just for me." He continued as he gripped your legs and pulled you closer them placed them on his shoulders. He lined his dick up with your entrance then slowly sank into you, you felt like screaming, the sensation was like no other, you needed every inch of him in you, you felt feral like a wild animal in heat, he bottomed out in you then watched your face to make sure you were comfortable.

"Please, Minho, fuck me, break me." You begged, and he listened, he didn't waste another second and started to drill into you deeply, his long dick reaching your spot easily as he beat down your gummy walls with no hesitation.

"I'm going to make you all mine Y/N, would you like that?" he groaned out as your walls squeezed him.

"Yes please~ Make me all yours Minho, I want to be yours, I want to belong to only you." He hissed at your words, his pace becoming sloppy and animalistic, your tears started to flow as he pounded into, he drew his fangs once again you watched his eyes glow as his pupils split like a cat then he bit into your thigh, you yelled out once again as you came, you felt a rush of his seed begin to spill into your core, it was hot as he filled you up, he removed his teeth from your thigh and sucked and licked your blood, he wiped your blood from his mouth then laid next to you.

You both breathed heavily then you cupped his face and kissed him deeply, the metallic taste of your blood still on his tongue, you pulled back the kiss then pulled him into your body, he pulled the covers over your naked forms and held you tightly.

"Minho, I love you?" you said.

"I love you too beautiful and please, you can call me Lino, Minho is my royal court name." he said as he kissed your forehead

"Royal court??"

"I'll explain it later."

[robininthelabyrinth]

My third prompt, which I just think would be Neat: He Kexin didn't die when lxc and lwj were young, and instead it was their father who passed away on a night hunt

A Significant Difference - ao3

Lan Qiren wouldn’t have thought that there was much difference between being acting sect leader and raising one’s nephews because your brother was in permanent seclusion and being acting sect leader as regent for one’s underaged nephews because one’s brother was dead, but apparently there was.

A significant difference.

He meditated on this difference for a while, then went to He Kexin precisely on schedule. It was the start of the month, half a month of time from Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji’s monthly mid-month visits, and it was the first time he had visited since he had broken his scheduled visits with his sister-in-law to inform her of her husband’s death. When he had done so, she had stared at him blankly, dull as if with shock. She had asked, firstly, how it had happened – the official answer was a night-hunt, and the true answer not too far removed from that, only the object of the night-hunt had been festering internally rather than pursued externally – and then, blinking rapidly, what that meant for her.

At the time, Lan Qiren had told her that he did not know, but that she should assume that nothing would change for the immediate moment and that he would inform her promptly of any developments.

He was fairly sure she had listened to him, but he was still cognizant of the fact that there were some differences in her demeanor when he arrived this time. She had been increasingly ill the past few months, her vivaciousness fading like the bloom come off a rose towards the end of summer, and although they had never spoken on the subject, Lan Qiren knew that her illness was not wholly physical, having more to do with the doctor’s too-blunt revelation that she was unlikely to bear more children to accompany her in her seclusion for a few too-short years than it did with any real disease. Now, however, she seemed both better and more anxious, which he could understand.

“Are you really going to make me go through the small talk first?” she asked as he started preparing the tea, and he sighed quietly to himself – He Kexin had never had much appreciation for etiquette, something his brother had found charming and which Lan Qiren had found irritating, finding her manner suggestive of a fundamental selfish disinterest in anything that got in her way rather than merely a careless desire to not waste time with that which seemed to her to be unimportant, the way it was for Cangse Sanren. Though perhaps he was simply biased in favor of the woman who was his friend, and who hadn’t murdered a member of his family and ruined his life.

“I am not,” he said. “But I would prefer to have some tea prepared in advance of this discussion.”

“Why? What’s the reason? Is it bad news?”

“There is no news. Nothing has changed since the last time we spoke, other than that I have investigated the impact of recent events on your situation and have come to you to hear your views on the subject before any decision is ultimately made.”

“Slow and steady, always contemplating,” she said, tone biting and scathingly provocative as always, but her shoulders relaxed. “Why the tea, then, if no decisions have been made?”

“I am making tea,” Lan Qiren said, rigidly controlling himself as always, “because l have observed that you like to have something to sip whenever you don’t want to respond to something I’ve said. I thought it polite to provide the option.”

As always, He Kexin looked taken aback by the notion that someone might do something for someone else when there was no benefit in it for themselves – for the longest time she’d been convinced that Lan Qiren had some sort of infatuation with her, and it had taken considerable time and effort to dissuade her from both the belief and her occasional attempts to take advantage of what she believed he felt. By now he was fairly sure that she had accepted that Lan Qiren genuinely disliked her, lacked any sort of attraction to her whatsoever, and that he would nevertheless advocate for her interests just as stridently as if he loved her, and yet he was also aware that to this day she did not understand why he would do such a strange and pointless thing.

At least she waited with more or less grace until the tea was ready.

“Well?” she asked. “Have your elders decided that I’m officially useless to them now that there’s no hope of any more heirs? Are they going to make me drink poison or order me strangled or something?”

Lan Qiren’s eye twitched. “You read too many novels. And before you ask, no, that isn’t a prelude to me cutting off your access to them.”

“You say that as if you didn’t cut me off from that traveling opera troupe I liked that one time,” she sniffed.

“Firstly, I did not cut you off from opera troupes in general, merely that one in specific. Secondly, I did that because it turned out that they were thieves and the entire purpose of the troupe was a means of gaining access to the Cloud Recesses to scout out our defenses.”

“Thieves or no thieves, they put on a damn good opera.”

Lan Qiren suppressed another sigh.

“The elders are not advocating for your immediate execution,” he said instead. “On the contrary, the situation has shifted in a material manner, which is why I wished to get your thoughts on the subject. If you are amenable?”

He Kexin pointedly took a sip of her tea instead of answering.

Lan Qiren wished that he could be petty and respond in kind, making it clear that he was equally willing to sit in silence for as long as He Kexin’s limited patience could hold out, but he was viscerally aware – he was never not aware – of the power dynamics that underlaid all of their interactions. However unwilling he might be, he was He Kexin’s jailor, and the power was always on his side. It was therefore incumbent upon him to keep his temper on a short leash and to be as obliging as he could be, no matter how obnoxious or deliberately provocative her behavior might be.

“I will assume that you are,” he said neutrally. “Although, as always, if you wish for this conversation to end, you may say so at any time and I will depart at once.”

He paused, but she said nothing – more desperate for company and news than disdainful of it, no doubt. He had tried several times over the years to find a way to allow her some company that she might prefer, perhaps someone of her own gender and age, unburdened by the history between them – someone other than the servants she disdained – but he had never had any success convincing the elders of the necessity. Even his own visits had been hard-fought victories, premised entirely on his insistence that to properly raise his nephews he needed the input of their mother.

It had never sat well with him.

“Very well,” Lan Qiren said, moving on. “With my brother’s death, the role of sect leader has now devolved unto Xichen, although naturally he is too young to accept the role. As a result, I am now officially regent in his stead.”

“Does that change anything?” He Kexin asked, and she sounded genuinely curious.

“It does,” he confirmed. “Before, my role was that of a temporary caretaker –”

“Temporary? For ten years?”

“For as long as it would have taken, yes. As long as my brother lived, he was Sect Leader, regardless of where he was or whether he carried out the duties of the position –”

He ignored He Kexin’s mumble of “Well, that’s bullshit”, even though he privately agreed with the assessment.

“– and as only a temporary caretaker, my ability to implement change was heavily prescribed by tradition, in order to forestall the risk that I seek to take advantage of my brother’s absence.”

He ignored this second “Bullshit!” as well, though he appreciated it.

“However,” he said, trying desperately to get to the point as quickly as his rigid manner could manage, “as regent, my status is different, and so is the scope of my jurisdiction. I have all the rights and powers of a true sect leader, able to implement my will on behalf of my nephews.”

“That distinction makes no sense at all.”

It did if one looked at the historical background behind each type of position, but Lan Qiren didn’t allow himself to be distracted by an academic debate He Kexin wouldn’t care about in the slightest.

“Regardless of how much or how little sense it may make, it means that I have more flexibility in arranging sect matters than I did before,” he said. “Including in regard to sect discipline and justice.”

He Kexin paused with her cup halfway up to her mouth.

“What does that mean?” she asked sharply. “Don’t talk around the subject. My fate was sealed long ago – if I leave this house or break my seclusion in any other way, I die. Is that not still the case?”

Lan Qiren looked at her steadily. “The sect leader has the ability to commute punishments for conduct that he was not involved in, as long as justice remains served.”

She exhaled. Hard.

“You have several options,” Lan Qiren said. “I could lighten the terms of your isolation, whether by allowing you more company here or by allowing you to live in the female quarters of the Cloud Recesses; as you know, men and women are separated here, with the exception of married couples. You would be permitted to see your sons more often – every afternoon, if you so wished.”

He Kexin pursed her lips. “What’s the catch?”

“That approach would only be a lightening of your original punishment. You would still be confined to the Cloud Recesses, and your sentence of execution would still be applicable should you ever depart from our home.”

“An expansion of walls,” she murmured, then frowned. “You said ‘that approach’. What’s the alternative?”

“I could change the nature of the punishment entirely,” he said. “I cannot simply lift it, you understand – you murdered an honored teacher, perverting the rules of both justice and hospitality, and no matter my sympathy to you in regard to the matter of not being permitted to see your sons, my nephews, that does not change what you did. You were wrong then and remain wrong now. To refuse to punish you would be for me to fail in my duty to my ancestors.”

“You’re stepping around the subject,” she observed. “That’s unlike you. What’s the second approach? What would the new punishment be?”

Lan Qiren took a breath, steadying his nerves. “Exile.”

He Kexin blinked, and then she started to smile. “Exile? You mean, leaving this place, never to return, that sort of exile?”

“That is correct,” he said, and before the joy had fully entered her face, he added: “Your sons would, however, remain here.”

Her smile faded.

“That seems unfair,” she said after a moment. “I’m their mother, after all.”

“They have already separated from you and entered the men’s quarters, and their surname is Lan,” Lan Qiren said, a touch censoriously. “They are the heirs of a Great Sect, with all that attends that. You cannot expect to simply take them with you as if you were the rogue cultivator you once were.”

Nor would he permit such a thing. Bad enough to have one Cangse Sanren out there, a rogue cultivator who took husband and child along with her to face whatever dangers there were out there by her side, but his nephews? He would rather die than risk them getting lost or hurt in a moment’s carelessness.

He Kexin tapped her cheek thoughtfully. “Would I still be able to see them at all if I took that option?”

“You would be able to see them outside the Cloud Recesses. Naturally we could arrange something in which I would escort them outside for the purpose of seeing you…assuming you were within reasonable distance.”

It wouldn’t be every afternoon, though. It might not even be every month, the way it was now – not unless He Kexin wished to live near the Cloud Recesses, which Lan Qiren assumed she did not.

He remained quiet after that, drinking his tea and waiting for her to think it over. He knew what type of choice he was presenting her with, and he disliked it, though he did not see any other path forward. For his nephews’ sake, he hoped that she chose the first option, or at minimum a delayed exile, choose to stay within the Cloud Recesses until her sons were of age, or at least a little older than they were now – that Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji might have the benefit of their mother for a little longer, and the way they should have had her all along, a constant presence rather than a rarely-seen figure hidden away. Even if it meant that he himself would have to suffer her presence more often, have to look upon the woman who had destroyed his dreams every day rather than merely twice a month, it would be worth it, for their sake.

Yet for her own sake, he felt he had to make her the offer of freedom now. For all that Lan Qiren saw himself firstly as his nephews’ guardian, then as a member of his sect, and only lastly as an individual, He Kexin was in a different situation. She had never wanted to marry his brother in the first place, and she’d borne two children as much for the company they’d given her as because she’d actually wanted them.

She was a person, not merely a mother. She was the one who had to make the decision. Lan Qiren could not decide for her, not even if he believed one choice to be better for his nephews than the other.

“If you would like to think about it for longer, you may,” he said. “Overnight, or even for a few days…”

He Kexin put down her cup with a definitive thunk.

“I’m not a slow plodder like you lot are,” she said, head held high and voice scathing as ever. “I know how to be decisive. I know what I want.”

Lan Qiren braced himself.

“Well?” he asked. “What have you decided?”

She told him.

[dream-in-seoul]

Rant about friendships coming up:

Let me make this clear, this is about people in my offline life, not about anyone here. I actually have multiple kind people checking on my wellbeing here and i appreciate you all so much even if I don't have much energy to reply and be cheerful these days 💜

However I just want to rant about how friendships have changed in the recent couple of years, at least for me and maybe someone else will find solace in my ramblings.

Ever since I became chronically ill, I lost most of my friends I made at university. Eventually, I stopped reaching out to people to hang out or talk to them because it was clear they were not interested. As my health declined, I was no longer able to travel across cities easily to visit them, and no one ever visited me. I always suggested we Skype instead, but to my surprise, people never wanted to. Now I am realising they wanted to go out not hang out with me.

One of the longest friendships I have managed to keep slowly fizzled out, probably ended already without me knowing and it is breaking my heart a bit.

This friend was willing to Skype me sometimes as it helped her pass the time when working on her art, however then she wanted to change her way of living and wanted to go out only. So I always travelled to see her and I spent the day walking around with her, hiking etc. no matter the time or weather. My friend knew how bad my health became and that hiking in heat made me close to passing out (I probably have pots) and sick and it would put me in bed for days or weeks. I always tried to be cheerful. I was happy to see my friend, but she would often lecture me about how bad my fitness was and how i would not feel as sick if I moved more (at the time I was still forcing myself to do daily walks and I had more movement daily than her).

Then she would ignore me for a few months when she had events to go to. I would get to listen the stories and sometimes was a little sad. I was never invited.

The last time we saw each other was in December. My body was throwing another issue at me (which is still lasting I am afraid) and I stood up for myself for the first time and asked whether we can skip the walking and stay in a cafe instead as I knew that even just the journey there will be harsh. My friend agreed and we sat down for a nice lunch as she told me about all the things she was watching, working on and the events she has been to. Then she told me about her new trainer and how he told her that he never tells his clients "not to do a certain exercise in a certain way so they don't fixate on it" which I guess makes sense. So I nodded and agreed and suddenly it went down the wildest rabbit hole.

I listened to my friend talk about how this works in everything in life and she will no longer listen to people's rambles about their issues because she doesn't want to go through the same thing as them because of it. If they tell her they are sick, then she would feel sick too, she concluded. (I highly doubt this is what her pt meant)

I was stunned. It wasn't hard to tell what she was hinting at. I just nodded. I respect that.

Then she asked about my worked, suggested I should either find extra work or "do something about it" and when I said, I don't think I can handle more work and that I am now dealing with a new symptom - I stopped myself and said: "I won't tell you about it of course since you have explained how harmful you find it"

"Yeah, exactly. Better not tell me, I don't want to be sick, too."

And I felt like shit. I didn't know what to talk about. My life was falling apart and I couldn't even tell my only friend.

Few months later, few days before I was due to leave to Korea, she texted me to hang out. For the first time, I declined. I was on antibiotics and needed all the rest before my flight "that is valid I guess."

Then I wished her happy birthday when it rolled around a month later. She did not remember mine. I invited her to come meet my new puppy. Of course, she never came.

Now I don't reach out, nor do I think I want her to. I don't want a friendship where I have to fake happiness to make someone else feel better. What has happened to our friendship. "Problems are for therapy" is what I have heard way too often from people who has usually never done therapy and as someone who has - no, they are not. Sometimes you need a therapist and sometimes you need a friend.

I hate how therapy culture is ruining friendships. How people grasp all those out of context sentences that ruin our sense of community.

Yes, put yourself first. I always encourage people to do that. But if you take it to extremes, are all your friends beneath you?

Yes, you don't owe anyone anything. But don't you want to have meaningful relationships where you help out and they help out?

If you want sanitised friendships, you are not experiencing friendships.

But I don't know. Perhaps I am in the wrong here.

[jhoudiey]

The second rotisserie chicken ship I've got is MomoTora! Another TR OC ship (someone get me off this boat I need to hyperfocus on other things too!) Again, questions from here

sketch comm from @/00-v2 of their awkward friendship before she goes to prison. (This is like... end timeline that i call the 'tora goes to therapy instead of prison arc' and doesn't spend 10 years locked up, but she goes in for 7 and they don't start dating until she's almost released. Unrelated, I spent a lot of time researching the Japanese prison system and lemme tell u bois it's fucked up.)

Pre-relationship

How did they first meet? at a Toman run in with another gang. She's the 'side piece' of the leader and ditches when Toman shows up cause she doesn't want anything to do with it.

What was their first impression of each other? Momoka: just some guy. Kazutora: Random hanger-on

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? LOL

Who felt romantic feelings first? Momoka. She didn't really do feelings for the longest time and ended up falling for him the day they kill her dad. (whoops spoilers heh)

Did either of them try to resist their feelings? Momoka doesn't say anything for a long while cause she's in prison so there's no point at all.

If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think? They'd laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh cause soulmates aren't real.

General

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? Kazu did. When she's in prison he suggests they go to this hot spring in Northern Japan together and she's like ??? until he explains that turns out he's got feelings for her too and wants to pursue them.

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? Kazu takes her on a virtual tour of a zoo on his phone when iphones become a thing and sneaks it into the visiting room at the jail. The internet craps out and they don't get very far, but the intention was there.

What was their first kiss like? well their first kiss is non-consensual from Momo's part and she tries to force himself on him which he rebuffs, but their first kiss that they're both into is in the parking lot of the prison.

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Momoka's first 'real' relationship where feelings are involved but that's about it.

What’s their height difference? Age difference? Kazu has got about 8 inches on her, and is about a month and a half older.

What’s their relationship with each other’s families? Non-existent. Tora stabs her dad in the neck with a pen (and she finishes the job and stabs him a bunch more times hence the 7 years in prison), and she doesn't meet his.

Who takes the lead in social situations? Tora, though he's not altogether stoked about it.

Who gets jealous easier? They're both pretty equal cause insecurity is a hell of a drug.

Love

Who said “I love you” first? Momoka. Her prison therapist tells her she needs to stop holding onto her feelings so writes it in a letter to Kazu and hopes he doesn't ghost her. 🤣

What are their primary love languages? Words of confirmation. They're both really broken people mentally and the reaffirmations about intentions are very helpful to both of them.

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA? Outside of holding hands, everything else is kept private.

What are their favorite things to do together? Watch movies in bed

Who’s better at comforting the other? They are both kind of shit at it.

Who’s more protective? Kazu, since Momo's 'been around the block a few times' and is still on speaking terms with several old flings.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? physical

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise? uhhhhh

What kind of nicknames do they call each other? Momoka calls him Kazu-tan (flirty, affectionate) cause it drives him fucking batty when they first meet, then it just sort of sticks. When she's being serious she just calls him Kazutora and she's always just been Momoka.

Domestic Life

If they get married, who proposes? Kazu! They finally go to the hot spring up north after a few years of putting it off and he proposes in the bath.

What’s the wedding like? Who attends? Very small, very chill. Just Toman main dudes+dates and that's about it.

How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like? They do not, and choose to not cause YIKES, daddy issues are strong in them.

Do they have any pets? They bring home one unruly cat named Batto from Peke-J land.

Who’s the stricter parent? N/A

Who kills the bugs in the house? Both.

How do they celebrate holidays? With a little liqour and little less clothes.

Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning? Momoka, cause a cold bed is the worst bed.

Who’s the better cook? UHM. 711?

[liltaz-asatreat]

I posted 2,958 times in 2022

That's 2,010 more posts than 2021!

670 posts created (23%)

2,288 posts reblogged (77%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@/idkanameatall

@/barry-j-blupjeans

@/holdmecloser-gandydancer

@/institute-of-planar-shitposts

@/taakosleftshoe

I tagged 2,458 of my posts in 2022

Only 17% of my posts had no tags

#taz balance - 840 posts

#taz ethersea - 552 posts

#taz - 517 posts

#taz ethersea spoilers - 419 posts

#fav - 356 posts

#taz fanfic - 326 posts

#taz art - 313 posts

#lup - 292 posts

#taako - 284 posts

#barry bluejeans - 220 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#i'll reblog this to both blogs because i think i have more followers who listen to tma on my main and you should be recognized for this 💜

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Just had a depressing thought

How the hell did Lucretia not lose her God damn mind between the time she erased everyone's memory and sent them on their way to starting the Bureau of Balance and even beyond that? Like, I lived in a small house with 9 other people for a good few years, and when I went to college and moved into the dorms there, one of the things I had the hardest time dealing with was the utter silence I was left in. My roommate moved into the dorm late because of rooming and organizational issues on the university's part, and then her mom didn't want to pay for her to stay in the dorm in the second semester, and they didn't move anyone else in with me. Among the many other issues I was having, the silence and loneliness was crippling in a really major way, and I had friends I was with at every chance I got to be with them. It was the most social year I had ever had, and I was still hardcore struggling with the fact that I had to go home to no one.

Lucretia didn't even have anyone to hang out with or talk to at all ever until she met Maureen and Lucas and started the Bureau. And even with having as many people on the base as she did, she still had to go home to no one. I just about lost my God damn mind in my situation, how. The fuck. Did she do it??? And for 10-12 years????

469 notes - Posted August 5, 2022

#4

One of my favorite meta things about the Stolen Century is how Griffin really thought he could cover 100 years of backstory in two episodes lmfao Like, as someone with ADHD, I understand how hard it is to figure out how long something is going to take, and I underestimate how long I'm going to need to do tasks and finish projects all of the time, but like, even if he wasn't expecting to get as deep with it as they ended up doing, the absolute confidence he had going in that he could cover 100 years in 2 hours, like, king there was no way but I admire how over confident you were about that lmao

484 notes - Posted May 13, 2022

#3

Angus really did have a big day on the Day of Story and Song. Like, first the Director had some shady shit going on with the Relic disposal chamber, then a strange man hops out of Taako's bag whom Taako and Merle claim said the Bureau is bad, then there's the discovery of the baby voidfish, then the Director has guards take them to a room where she is kneeling over the balls that had contained the Relics and is channeling energy out of the undestroyed bell into her staff, then she talks mad shit about coming from another reality with tres horny bois, the guy whose name is Barry, and some person named Lup who is dead(?) while Taako and Merle are trying to keep their heads from exploding, then Davenport can actually talk and was captain of this past mission this whole time, then Magnus comes barging in and he can see the absolute chaos of the apocalypse outside, so he tries to barracade the door while the others are going down memory lane, then the others start debating about leaving everyone to the forces outside versus putting up a shield that would still end up destroying the world in a manner that suggests they've had this argument exhaustively before, then they get attacked and BOOM a lich comes out of Taako's umbrella who is apparently Lup who is apparently his sister, then Lucretia disappears and Davenport wants him to help find her even though he still has no clear idea of what the fuck is happening, then he hears the story and song and suddenly gains the knowledge of their 100 year journey and the impending end of the world, then he meets up with the others again when he and Davenport can't find her only to find Lucas is also not dead, then Lucretia turns up, a crystal shows them a possible future, and Taako knew the answer to save everything all along, then he's expected to help fight against a world ending evil force, and then FINALLY they defeat the Hunger, and he's got time to process the absolute wild day he just had.

And just like, I feel like probably around the time he found out Lucas was still alive he was just like:

560 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

#2

Balance: Don't split up the party or you will die

Amnesty: Splitting up the party is tentatively okay depending on what you're doing except it did, in fact, get someone killed

Graduation: We're going to refuse to split up as much as possible because we're best buds

Ethersea: If we don't split up and do wild ass stunts before somehow reconvening back at the ship then what even is the fucking point

1,362 notes - Posted April 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

What I like about the scene where Magnus spins mind in Wonderland is that Griffin chose the lesser of two evils because it would have been really fucked to make him choose whether or not he forgets Julia which most definitely would have resulted in a no and forced them to take another two spins without much deliberation, but I think it also paints an interesting picture in-game of the characterization of Lydia and Edward. They believed that love wasn't a strong enough force to sustain them anymore and that it wasn't as important, and I think that's also reflected in how they thought the worst memory to take from him would be the person who caused his suffering and not the person he loves. Because to them, suffering is more important now, and it's how they sustain themselves, so why wouldn't it be the thing sustaining him too?

1,603 notes - Posted March 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[pandemellia]

Ugly Thoughts #2: I'm elated that you feel alone💖

Two weeks ago, my ex made a TikTok video where he was concerned that no one was asking him if he was okay. 

And I was thinking like-

PFFFFT HAHAHA!

LOOK AT THIS PATHETIC ASS FUCK OVER HERE!

NOW YA SORRY ASS KNOWS HOW IT FEELS TO BE ALONE!

YOU KNOW? LIKE HOW YOU CHEATED ON ME, THEN LED ME ON AND EMOTIONALLY NEGLECTED ME FOR TWO MONTHS WITH LITTLE TO NO REASSURANCE THAT YOU'D NEVER DO IT AGAIN, AND HARDLY ASKED IF I WAS OKAY?

AND I BEARED IT ALL ANYWAYS BECAUSE I WANTED US TO WORK OUT DESPITE MY MENTAL HEALTH DETERIORATING FOR THE SAKE OF YOURS?!

YET YOU STILL ABANDONED ME FOR SOME DISGUSTING HOE?!

I'M HAPPY AS FUCK THAT NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOU! 

HOW ABOUT YOU ASK THE LOWLIFE FUCKS THAT DO FURRY SEXUAL ROLE PLAY WITH YOU?! YOU KNOW, THE SAME ONES YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH AND YOU'RE CHEATING ON YOUR PARTNER WITH NOW?!

WHERE ARE THEY NOW, HUH?! THEY'RE YOUR "FRIENDS" AREN'T THEY?! THAT'S THE EXCUSE YOU USED WHEN I ASKED YOU TO BLOCK THEM SO THEY MUST BE ALWAYS THERE FOR YOU, RIGHT?!

I'M PRETTY SURE THROWING AWAY 4 YEARS BECAUSE YOUR DEGENERATE ASS WANTED TO INDULGE IN YOUR STEP BRO-SIS FURRY FANTASIES WASN'T WORTH IT NOW, WAS IT?!

LET'S.FUCKING.GOOO-

So anyways; I may feel lonely now, BUT I'VE NEVER FELT as lonely as I did when he ignored me when I needed his reassurance after he cheated on me. It was extremely emotionally painful, at least for me.

Instead, he decided to ignore the problem, and hoped it magically fixed itself by insisting on a "break". 

I don't care how immature this makes me, but I DESPISE relationship "breaks". I may have said this before, and I'll keep repeating it again: when anyone suggests to take a "break", it's either because they wanna have an affair with someone else, or they're thinking of breaking up with you and running away from the problem. 

This has been proven time and time again on Reddit where people ask for advice about these topics.

Also, I have trust and abandonment issues, so it's pretty self explanatory on why this wouldn't work out for me.

My point is; a relationship is teamwork, and I believe you shouldn't emotionally check in and out of a relationship at your convenience, at the expense of your partner's mental health. 

If a relationship needs time to cool down from an issue, then take a few days apart. But a break will never ever be a solution for me. 

Nevertheless, he always insisted on breaks (the one that led to the break up was the longest, these breaks usually lasted 2 weeks or more) before this whenever we had problems in our relationship, and I always reluctantly complied despite him knowing why I hated breaks. He has depression, so I always wanted to accommodate his mental health.

Guys. 

I don't remember if I mentioned this to him, but I literally would Google symptoms of depression to try to understand why was he always acting this way. That's how much I cared about him. I learned that people with depression often have depressive episodes where they shut everyone out because they feel like a burden on them.

So I suffered in silence and tried to my best to suppress my resentment every time he'd ignore me.

But as it turns out, he never had "depressive episodes". He just used those breaks as more time to exchange nudes with other people and do sexual online roleplay with others while I was alone, riddled with anxiety and paranoia that he was cheating on me. 

Back to the last break that led to the break up; every single day, for two months during our "break", I was in constant fear that he'd cheat on me again, abandon me, or leave me for someone else. That was absolute mental torture. I cried everyday, was on edge all of the time on not knowing where we stood; and worst of all, I was made to feel like a burden for feeling anger and sadness from being cheated on. It's the reason why I don't go to the few friends I have on my main social media for the heartbreak I'm dealing with now. I felt (and sometimes still do) like this worthless thing that didn't deserve to have their feelings acknowledged.

And he managed to end up doing all three. Yes, leaving your current partner for someone else is emotionally cheating. You're falling in love with someone else while you're taken; and instead of working to get rid of those feelings by cutting off contact, you fuel them more by starting an emotional affair with the other person. And if you have it in you to objectify your soon to be ex partner by replacing them with someone else, then it's clear you never loved them in the first place. I swear, the only people who'd deny that this shit is cheating are the fuckers that are guilty of this lol. It's not just as simple as, "aS sOoN aS yOu'Re sInGlE, yOu gEt tO fUcK wHoEvEr yOu wAnT". No, people who do this start off their new "relationship" with deceit and manipulation, fuck off.

Writing this also made me realize that on the night he broke up with me, he had the goddamn audacity to BLAME ME FOR THE PROBLEM HE SINGLE-HANDEDLY CAUSED BY SAYING, "I cAn'T hAnDlE yOuR rEsEnTmEnT"

THIS BITCH REALLY TRIED TO MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY FOR FEELING ANGRY AT HIM FOR CHEATING ON ME! AFTER I TRIED TO SUPRESS MY FEELINGS OF RESENTMENT TO GET PAST THIS ISSUE SO OUR RELATIONSHIP COULD WORK!

HE BASCIALLY EXPECTED ME TO FIX ALL OF HIS CHEATING ISSUES BY MYSELF BY JUST SMILING AND PRETENDING LIKE IT NEVER HAPPENED.

HE ALSO SAID DURING THAT PHONE CALL, "Did you ever ask me if I was okay?" WHEN I BROUGHT UP HIM IGNORING ME ALL OF THE TIME.

BRUH YOU FUCKING CHEATED ON ME! MY PATIENCE DOES HAVE A LIMIT YOU KNOW!

ALSO ALSO, YOU IGNORED ME BECAUSE YOU INSISTED ON A BREAK! WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT ME TO DO? KEEP SPAMMING YOU WITH TEXT MESSAGES?! YOU WOULD'VE GIVEN ME HEAT FOR THAT TOO AND SAY THAT I WAS SUFFOCATING YOU!

I do have to add that he did ask if I was okay only once during the break...buuut then he kept ignoring me, never reassured me that he wasn't cheating, never blocked his sexual roleplay partners, never overall showed me he was willing to change his toxic behavior, etc. He never took my feelings seriously even though it was very clear that I wasn't okay with him ignoring me. So I think that question was just a way to relieve his guilt about his emotional affair with his current partner rather than actually showing genuine concern about me.

I actually wanna go back to our Instagram chat and see exactly how that particular conversation went, but I don't wanna trigger myself more. I'm honestly already crying writing about how I felt during the break.

Going back to the depressive episodes thing, I think its ironic because now I've been currently struggling with a depressive episode where I've temporarily deactivated my main social media so no one can contact me. Because I feel like a burden to my friends.

Because of him.

So I totally understand why someone with depression would isolate themselves, but I'd never ignore my partner like that. I felt like he just did that to ignore any accountability for his actions (and to cheat) until I was so starved for affection, that I'd just give him a pass for whatever caused an issue in our relationship in the first place. And I fell for it.

Every time.

He even said shit like "wElL i wAs tAuGhT tO jUsT mOvE oN" as a way to sweep issues under the rug, so there's that.

The most frustrating part about this is; even if he gets these moments where he feels alone like in that TikTok video, he will never feel it in the same devastating way I perceive loneliness, if that makes sense.

[notagarroter]

I posted 2,774 times in 2022

45 posts created (2%)

2,729 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@the-sign-of-tea

@migurin

@thetimemoves

@theleftpill

@lazy-crooked-barbarian

I tagged 646 of my posts in 2022

#dracula - 131 posts

#lol - 21 posts

#my comment - 19 posts

#other people's meta - 17 posts

#ask - 15 posts

#original post - 15 posts

#not sherlock - 8 posts

#lmao - 7 posts

#eurus - 7 posts

#acd - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 131 characters

#it's weirdly comedic to imagine dracula rushing downstairs to grab the laudanum bottle and drug the wine before the maids catch him

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Just binge watched sherlock for the first time and something and came across your blog. In your opinion do you think Sherlock has professional combat training, maybe trained as a professional but decided to opt out of doing it? Or did he learn from experience? Him holding his own against Mary's former partner must say something.

What an excellent question!

I think there are two plausible answers here... One is that Sherlock has a history working for whatever government agency Mycroft is supposed to represent, and got his training that way. Now, Sherlock implies on a few occasions that he refuses to work for Mycroft (like in ASIP and TGG), and sometimes they clearly work at cross purposes (like in HLV). But Mycroft does offer him work in HLV (which Sherlock is forced to accept by the end of the episode), and he probably wouldn't be able to do that if Sherlock didn't have some pre-existing relationship with whatever intelligence agency, along with appropriate training.

The other likely possibility is suggested by the original canon. In Doyle's stories, Holmes tells us that he has studied a martial art called Baritsu -- probably a reference to Bartitsu, a wacky but real fighting method drawing together jujitsu, boxing, and cane fighting, among others. If our Sherlock was engaged in something similar, he might be basically self-taught, or perhaps working with private trainers or sparring partners.

Personally, I think the first option is a bit more likely, but the second is more fun. ;)

Anyone else have different headcanons for where Sherlock got his training?

84 notes - Posted March 10, 2022

#4

This video is giving me so many feeeeeeeeeels

96 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

#3

Re: Dracula

I keep seeing posts here observing that Bram Stoker's original readers would not have been as versed in vampire lore as we moderns are -- vampires would have been a new concept to them, right?

I just want to say, no, not really.

In addition to Carmilla and Polidori's Vampyre, may I introduce into evidence the hugely popular but now largely forgotten Varney the Vampire?

Varney was serialized between 1845-47 as a "penny dreadful" and was basically the Twilight of its day. Even people who didn't read it would have heard about it.

Point being: when Victorian readers read about two pinprick holes in Lucy's throat, they would have known EXACTLY what that meant.

See also

155 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

#2

I'm very sad that my dash doesn't have one single post of Sherlock saying "am I the current king of England?"

I don't have time to make or hunt for gifs! Someone needs to get on this, please.

181 notes - Posted September 10, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

lmao we're in the new yorker for being weird has-beens

Tumblr is something like an Atlantis of social networks. Once prominent, innovative, and shining, on equal footing with any other social-media company, it sank under the waves as it underwent several ownership transfers in the twenty-tens. But it might be rising once more. Tumblr’s very status as a relic of the Internet—easily forgotten, unobtrusively designed, more or less unchanged from a decade ago—is making it appealing to prodigal users as well as new ones.

...

The Tumblr users I spoke to, both new and returning, cited a few unfashionable aspects that keep them using the platform. Tumblr’s main feed doesn’t shuffle posts algorithmically based on what it determines might appeal to a user... Posts appearing in the feed are undated, and many accounts are pseudonymous, creating a respite from the frenetic exposure of other social media. Users spoke of the platform feeling disconnected from the “real world”—no President would ever try to shape world events with a Tumblr post.

...

What makes Tumblr obsolete, for the moment, are the same things that lend it an enduring appeal. The fact that it maintains a following should remind us that we use social-media services by choice; no platform or feature is an inevitability.

400 notes - Posted January 16, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[youknowwhoiamassbutt]

Hello, i just wanted to tell you that i love your parksborn fics and have been literally obsessed with them. I saw that you were open to recommendations so i thought I'd try it out. I don't know if you are anymore, since you haven't uploaded in a while or if you're even open to it anymore but I'd really appreciate it if you could think about it (don't have to of course, no pressure).

so um, the storyline goes like this, or idk it's just something that suddenly came to mind.

Pater started an OF account to get some cash, not thinking much of it. He knew his body was attractive, what he didn't know was that he would get an admirer. A guy, whom he regularly got into private calls with, who also wore a mask so he didn't know who he was but god... His voice seemed so familiar... Maybe that's why he kept doing this, thinking that it was someone else, someone he had been in love with for the longest time. Until one day he asks to reveal his face (yada yada, he's reluctant but he shows it in the end for a big sum of money), he does it and the other boy goes into shock. He slowly removed his mask to reveal his own face. Harry... Harry Osborn. HIS FUCKING BEST FRIEND. The one he imagined him to be, the one he's literally been in love with, was actually the guy he's been showing his body to! The one he's been doing (all these lewd things for)... Oh my god! Harry seems flabbergasted, his mouth slightly ajar, his blush growing by the minute as Peter's face remains as red as a tomato as they started at each other for a long minute. Completely silent.... Harry's pov: he had been scrolling on OF to get some thrill until he saw a boy, who looked just like his friend Peter.... He hid his face but god... He looked just like him, his voice, the shape of his shoulders, the curve of his back... He couldn't help it. He had liked him for the longest time now, but he couldn't tell him that. Couldn't tell him how much he loved him. Couldn't tell him about the lewd thoughts he's been having about him.... He subscribed. It's alright to think about your friend like this right? not like it's actually him (Right?).

Literally just copy pasted it. So yeah, just wanted to tell you that I really love how you bring the personalities of the characters and how even if it's supposed to be a smut fic, you managed to make it so genuine, it felt so real omg. And I'm really not good with words but uh, yeah, i love you!

Thank you so much!!!! Your words mean so much to me!

That's such a great idea! I always love hearing people's suggestions and I am honored that you like my writing enough to want me to bring your ideas to life. Unfortunately, I've had to steer away from writing people's suggestions over the last few years, because when I would try, I would never finish it and then I just spent too much time away from my other works. It ended up that I would never publish anything at all.

What you wrote was already so lovely, I think you're very good with words, and I would be very excited to read the story if you, or someone else, decided to write it.

Thank you again. This was very lovely to wake up to.

[sublimealpacapuppy]

Why is the concept of "Do not talk about other people's bodies" so god-damned hard to understand for parents?... Oh now I understand

TL;DR: Watched the reason why my dad can't comprehend you can't talk to someone else about their body happening before my eyes in real time

I don't know how to explain it any further without dumbing it down to a kindergarten level.

I (24M) am a big guy. Not huge, I am around 105kg and 1.85m. So no skinny, a little fat maybe, but really I am generally really happy with my body and I have come to terms with the fact that I really don't want to be skinny nor do I want to make the effort in going down in weight. If you give me a list of what are the most important things to do right now, going down to my "ideal" weight is not on there. It's okay for me.

My dad (55M) has quite a similar complexion to mine. I have no idea on the exact weight nor do I care, and I think that is the point.

I fundamentally don't care and I know full well that it is none of my business to say anything about him, whether good or bad, whether I come from a genuine place of actually helping or if I come from a place of angust or fear. Is not my place is not my body I Don't Care.

I consider this true for everything, from the color of the hair, what clothes they wear, but I think is especially true for things about nutrition.

It's just like "You are not a doctor, dad, if you were, even then I wouldn't appreciate you judging me. I didn't ask for advice, no thanks"

Would you imagine if we had the same approach that people in general have with eating and nutrition to other topics?

"I am worried about how you are fighting your depression, have you tried reading this book on autohelp"

"well maybe if you guys try this position I saw online you can have children"

It's just ridiculous.

For the longest time I have tried (unsuccessfully) to explain why you shouldn't talk about other people's bodies. Especially mine, my body. Is not a discussion or a topic I want to have, that I would accept. A few weeks ago, last time he tried it I just said "NO" to any question that was directed at me. He took this as me being defensive, and really I don't care. Especially because what prompted such talk was taking one extra breaded steak that he thought was okay. I was having none of it.

About a week ago one of my uncles (my dad's oldest brother) came to visit. Keep in mind they rarely see each other, it is not that they hate each other, just that they live far apart, have different lives, and have both of them (as for the rest of that family) huge egos.

Yesterday as we were going out to eat at the restaurant I had a few eye opening experiences.

As we were waiting for the elevator to arrive my uncle didn't wait a second and just went down 5 floors, to which I just said "the impatient ones, right?" To my dad and he responded "he (my uncle) is right [basically suggesting a health and weight loss issue]

When we were eating my uncle started rumbling about some lentil base tortillas saying that they are healthier.

And it clicked, it comes from my grandmother. She does exactly the same thing. Is eating with guilt so bad. Nothing and I do mean nothing is except from this guild. Even fruits can be unhealthy to their eyes.

Of course this guilt can have a double purpose. Since it can be used as a reason to NOT like things. My dad, for example, is not really into sweets so they are unhealthy because they have too much sugar bla bla bla. However, a bowl of chips with salsa, oh yes, bring it on.

All of this doesn't exclude him from making hurtful comments, or being rude to me, or even making me feel bad for things that I shouldn't. However it does give me a way for me to live in peace with, he is not doing to change. And that is okay.

Sorry for making this post so long. I hope you liked it, I just want to share my experience.