#and hear Sexualized live

[syn-back-in-black]

Darren Spooner (Jarvis Cocker) performing with Relaxed Muscle at Razzmatazz in 2014

[tsuchinokoroyale]

Oh no! I’m ass

[themthistles]

i think that while micro labels can seem useful and affirming ultimately they're isolating and kind of an obstacle to your understanding of self. that's because you can never find a word specific enough. there will never be a label or two labels or even ten, twenty of them to perfectly capture and describe all of your thoughts, feelings, experiences, preferences, needs, interests, identities, etc. because you learn more and more about yourself every day and then you change and your wants and needs change with you. having to hop between labels, fearing that you don't 'fit' into a label anymore (both in your own and others eyes), worrying how soon your current label will wear out, questioning if you'll ever fully fit a single one. all that causes a lot of uncertainty and anxiety which could be avoided by just picking a more general thing and molding it according to what it means to YOU. because words will always mean different things to different people, you will never be understood immediately and maybe never completely by anyone but yourself and that's fine

[mad-hunts]

i like how barton went from being like... a hippie in terms of how he viewed sex in his early twenties, then kind of abstained from it for a few years / became sexually repressed, which... definitely isn't such a good thing. BUT then he became even more of a freak (and i do mean that in the good way this time LOL) around the time he started residency because WOW is that shit stressful. though that was also unfortunately around the time when he really started to spiral as well 😬 but we don't need to talk about that ahahhh

like the way this man learned how to express his sexuality REALLY came full circle in the end considering he was like 'yeah, back in the early days that i was in college, i was a freak. but now i'm not anymore... though do you want to see me do it again anyway?' like 💀 JSJSJ if he weren't so demented, i'd almost be inclined to say good for him, y'all LMAO feeling comfortable with your sexuality and perhaps even having a bit of fun with it (though maybe too much in barton's case, because he literally weaponizes it in order to lure in his victims. BUT once again, we don't need to talk about that right now psshhh. i actually fully intend on talking about that in the tags NGL) is more often than not a good thing after all

[angelsdean]

i mean i don't know why i even bother to vote / look at certain polls. they just annoy me.

[abby420]

being attracted to women is so hard cause i’ll think a woman is hot asf and be interested in her but then my brain goes “how DARE you sexualize her??? hasn’t she been through ENOUGH!? can’t women do ANYTHING without being sexualized???”

[boyobjectifier]

no yeah i love when tumblr doesn’t let me edit a post i reblogged. definitely won’t drive me crazy that i missed a word in the tags and it changes the meaning of the sentence

no yeah tumblr is such a cool and very functional app :)

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

”I don’t want to give Jehovah’s organization a black eye so I have to suffer in silence. Oh the pain! The pain!”

Mhm. Have you ever considered that Jehovah’s organization has given you not one, but two proverbial black eyes, broken ribs, and a concussion over the years; and maybe you should expose them for the abusers they are, if only enough to get yourself help to heal from the abuse you’ve experienced? You’ve got Stockholm syndrome bad, and you’re making it everyone else’s problem. You cared about your abusers so much that you abused me in their name, just because I wanted no part of their organization. Even if I didn’t seek out apostate resources, I wouldn’t have needed them to make my decision to leave because of how much you vented about them to me since I was about five years old. Did you just expect me to stay here and take the abuse like you did? I’m better than that; I’m better than you.

[wild-at-mind]

How do I become the right level of sexual to be loved and adored in my own community?

[magnoliamyrrh]

i think that whole "never felt safe growing up and most of my life" thing did real damage to my psyche lmao

[moonmoonthecrabking]

i know that all my Tumblr Peeps know this but just because i want to say it: a person with a label is not any more (or less) valid than a person without a label. a person without a label is not any more (or less) evolved than a person with a label. thank you :)

[resentful-reads]

Desmond by Ulysses Grant Dietz

[l-cereta]

just very strange all around bc the main group of online friends i have (who i value a lot! if ur reading this ily!) never really talk abt sex on account of the community having a lot of adults & minors concurrently at points & not wanting to cross any boundaries with that. it makes sense! but now im a 20yr old tranny on enough estrogen that i want someone to get me pregnant & im just in this very awkward state of like why am i pretending like i'm not a person who also has sexual desire.

[pebblezone]

Every day I find out a different song I like is in fact a cover and lose my shit

[fandomfluffandfuck]

To the almost-30 virgin nonny- I’m in the exact same boat (I don’t have a driver’s license either, which if you’ve seen Clueless is sort of hilarious). I figured out a while ago that I’m probably on the ace spectrum, but I also went through a lot of childhood trauma that makes it difficult for me to get close to people emotionally, let alone with my body. Like you, I almost never fantasize about myself in sexual situations and it’s extremely rare that I feel sexual attraction to someone I actually know (vs a celebrity). But it’s so confusing, because sometimes I yearn to know what someone else touching me sexually feels like, and wonder if this is really my sexuality or if it’s just maladaptive behavior that I should be pushing against.

In the end, I’ve realized I have to come around to acceptance that I might never know for sure, while leaving myself open to opportunities to learn differently. It’s scary and lonely (to me), but you aren’t alone ❤️

related to this, and this

(Is there some connection between being ace and not having a driver license? My best friend, whose ace (the one that I mentioned earlier) also doesn't have one. Nor does the other ace person I'm friends with in real life... coincidence? I think not! Lmao)

I can totally see how trauma would shape your relationship to sexuality. Obviously, it's not just your environment or circumstances that creates your sexuality or sexual orientation, but... I certainly think it can shape it in addition to the way you're born. And I can also understand why that would be confusing, trying to untangle what is learned and what's innate--whether it even matters or not if it's learned.

I'm glad you've come to some peace, though. Acceptance is great. Hopefully overtime you find yourself being less lonely and less afraid.

Thanks for sharing, I'm sure the other questioning anon appreciates it immensely! <3