#and i am very well aware that exams or presentations are not that important or grades...

[adore-gregor]

So

[aromanticannibal]

Transfem Katsuki (edited as of Nov. 2023. Katsuki hadn't died yet when this was written so bear with me.)

In honor of "fuck I thought about transfem Katsuki and now I'm in love with her again" and also because of a shitty discourse post I saw. Enjoy.

She will NOT figure it out until at least second year of UA.

She's always been uneasy about the whole boy thing. Specifically boy. Like she's one of the guys ok sure but she's not a boy.

We know how kind Aldera is to anyone who's slightly out of the norm (ie Deku) and Katsuki is especially aware given she was part of the problem. So yeah, internalized transphobia (+homophobia) we love to see it./s

Getting into UA and quickly realizing that like more than half the class is openly and proudly queer in some way gave her whiplash, and as much of a bully as she still was at this point, she didn't say anything.

She tried to convince herself it was to not get in trouble and gamble her place at UA, but really she was just glad to not be somewhere as fucked as her middle school.

And if the trans ponytail chick makes her question who she really wants to be... well that's nobody's business.

As I am very subtly implying, Momo ends up being a big part of Katsuki accepting herself and her identity as a trans woman.

Katsuki loves her friend group (she'll never admit it but she does, so much) but she associates them with her old group from Aldera somewhat unconsciously, and is terrified they'll push her away, even if she knows she's just. Straight up wrong.

As in, so incredibly wrong. Sero and Jirou are non binary ("Whatever the hell that means") Kirishima is a proud trans man ("More of a man than any of the cretins at Aldera will ever be") Mina's dating a trans girl from another school ("Camie Utsushit or smth") and Kaminari is so many different flavors of queer its almost impressive.

Really, her friends are probably the ones that should be worried, she tries to remind herself, hammering it in her head. Katsuki was an asshole for most of her life, they should be the ones scared of her. They're not though. For some fuckin' reason.

So yeah, talking to her friend group is out of the question. Momo though.

Momo is a special kind of trustworthy. Momo is the kind of person you'd give your entire life savings, your child, your car and your wife to. Katsuki hates that, she hates trusting people, it always ends badly, so she prefers doing stuff on her own.

Except it doesn't always end badly. Especially not with Yaomomo.

Every early saturday morning, Katsuki's and Momo's workout sessions happen at the same time. Eventually, they start talking during that time. Katsuki eventually asks about Momo being trans, more or less convinced she'll tell her to go fuck herself (she obviously doesn't).

It helps, despite the fact that her experience isn't the same as Katsuki's at all. Momo always knew she was a girl, her parents always were supportive about it, and money really wasn't a problem to help her transition once she was old enough to make that decision. Hell, she can literally make estrogen.

Katsuki then comes to the realization that yeah, she's probably a girl. Not like I'll ever do shit about it, she thinks.

Things kinda stay stagnant for a time then. Katsuki has way more important stuff to worry about (like exams and also her and her friends almost dying etc etc) and the self-hatred that simmers in her head constantly doesn't make it really fun to actually think about herself.

Second year comes around.

Because this is me, and my blog, and I do what I want, I present to you my son, Shinsou. Most trans guygirl t4t lesbian of all time. In my heart.

So Shinsou is very trans in the most mysterious way you could think of, so mysterious he himself doesn't really know what is going on with his gender. He doesn't exactly care, he just vibes (any pronouns).

They're pretty knowledgeable on queer stuff because it loves to read wikipedia pages until 5AM when it can't sleep and got lost on multiple LGBTQ+ related forums when she was 13. (He also knows a lot about chickens and lizards.)

She can just breathe the queer coming out of Katsuki, but when they ask they're just met with "oh Bakugou? Yeah no, he's cishet. Our token straight man. To prove we're diverse, etc." (-Shouji, entirely serious). Shinsou's not buying it but she doesn't like assuming, so he shuts up.

Meanwhile, Katsuki has nothing to think about anymore now that things have settled and she's not getting attacked by her self-hatred constantly, so she unfortunately ends up thinking about her gender (truly tragic. Genuinely though, it's almost distressing because she pushed the thought down for so long that it's scary to think about).

Because early mornings and nights are a time outside of our world, it's again around 5AM that Katsuki talks to someone who might help her with her gender problem. Shinsou in fact, who's of course awake on a Monday morning after a sleepless night, eating cereal out of the box.

Katsuki finds herself chatting with the weirdo and eventually asks what the fuck kinda gender it is, if only to be able to call her something else than the weirdo in her head.

The realization that gender is a construct and doesn't really fucking exist so it doesn't actually matter is somewhat of an epiphany for Katsuki. Like she's silent for multiple minutes. Shinsou is getting scared

Quietly, she mutters a small "I think I'm a girl" to Shinsou. It smiles and says "Nice. There's not enough girls in this class." and goes back to its cereal.

Katsuki has no fucking idea how that fucker exists. He's an anomaly in the timeline. Katsuki adores them.

(Platonically. Girl doesn't have time for romantic love. Yes I'm also making her aromantic, because aro Katsuki is the loml and one of my fave hcs.)

After that weird but insightful conversation, Katsuki finally asks Momo for help, taking her up on an offer she had made one morning. ("If you ever need my help for anything concerning [your gender bullshit], come see me.")

Momo being the absolute QUEEN that she is, she assembles all transgirls and cisgirls of the class + whoever else would like to join (which ends up being Jirou, Shinsou and Aoyama) and they all go on a shopping trip with Katsuki to help her figure out what she likes.

Does she want to wear makeup? Does she want feminine clothes? Or long hair? Does she want boobs? Or thinner traits?

Does she just want different pronouns and to be addressed viewed as a girl?

Mina shortens that as "What kinda girl is Katsuki".

I'll do you the answer here so this doesn't take forever, because the process of figuring it out must be long.

Mainly, the verdict will eventually be that Katsuki didn't really feel comfortable in the box she, her parents and Aldera put her in, which is a sort of vague idea of a Boy, Man, Son. She's mean and a bitch and probably a tomboy and she's a girl. That's all. She doesn't want of any of that flowery pink crap and being "gracefully feminine" like Momo is, she'll still kick your teeth in. Being a girl isn't fundamentally part of her identity or her personality, but it's who she's comfortable being.

She does enjoy skirts once she feels comfortable enough to wear them. She grows her hair a bit too (because she doesn't wanna look like her mother at first, but she ends up liking the look) and puts it up in a ponytail.

Makeup is a bitch but it looks cool, so she lets Mina, Aoyama and Shinsou use her face as a canevas for their weird makeup experiments. She thinks she looks like a clown half the time though (she doesn't, she's really cute). She mostly does eyeliner, which she already knew how to do before starting her transition, and very rarely lipgloss.

She doesn't really care about having breasts or softer traits, mainly because her traits are already pretty androgynous when she looks at herself, and she's already got big pecs so like. Basically tits. It's the same, it doesn't really matter. She's happy with how her body looks, she worked to have a healthy body and she doesn't care if it's "not a woman's body" or whatever the fuck. She likes how her body is and she doesn't really care about changing it.

She thinks of using she/they (like Jirou) but doesn't exactly care about they/them? Like they're not bad to have used on her (way better than he/him) but she prefers just using she/her.

She doesn't change her first name. It means victory, so it's already perfect for her. It's her name.

Some of her friends (the ones who aren't scared of death cough cough Shinsou) call her Katsuki-chan (Kacchan is copyrighted) but most her friends call her Kats', because she let slip one time she thinks it's cute.

To end this because good lord I've been typing for some time, here's my Transfem Bakugou pinterest board. I actually have a bunch of transfem characters pinterest boards lmao

Also realizing I almost didn't talk about Izuku. Damn I've really betrayed myself as a bkdk truther. Rip.

[fumiko-matsubara]

Describing Chiba's personality like he's a main character on a well-written wikia page

Because way too many people mischaracterized him for my liking and enough is ENOUGH!

Note: I am ignoring the anime adaptation because the changes they made completely ruined Chiba's character.

Chiba generally appears to be a calm and serious boy whose maturity and professionalism for his age was always noted by others during missions. He always gets the job done with little to no complaints, simply allowing his results to speak for his high skills. Along with his fellow sniper Hayami, Chiba tends to be compared to a working adult.

But outside of assassination, Chiba is surprisingly fairly social and bubbly, often seen wearing a wide smile on his face and is rarely alone. He seems to enjoy the company of others and is always present whenever his classmates gather to do an activity together. Because no one can see his expression with the way his hair covers his eyes, Chiba becomes frequently misunderstood by strangers, but his close classmates described him to be a very gentle and soft-hearted person.

Chiba is very tolerant and tends to be a little bit of a people pleaser, always putting other people’s feelings over his own even at the risk of possibly wearing himself out. The reason why he hides his eyes is to accommodate his peers when he was younger since his intense gaze made him appear to be always on guard. Similarly, he dislikes letting others down. It’s why he never complains when his classmates began putting their faith in his skills when he was assigned the most important role in the Island Assassination attempt. He fears that letting his concerns be known before the attempt was made might shake his classmates’ confidence and he doesn’t want that. Hence, he swallowed his feelings and continued on with the job. Later, Chiba outwardly admits that he felt so pressured by the amount of faith his classmates had in him that it inevitably affected his usually near-perfect performance. 

Chiba is notably keen on logic and prefers to only rely on solid facts when taking in information. He is a realist who lives in the present, using his five senses to quietly observe the world around him, thus noticing details that most people tend to miss. After the announcement of their final exam results when he noticed the dejected Karma despite the nonchalant front, he knew exactly what to do to cheer him up. Another example was when he decided to check on Kurahashi who was feeling down after Takaoka began taking over their PE classes, aware of her interest towards Karasuma.

His spatial awareness was what makes his sniping accuracy be of high level, easily being able to determine the distance between point A and point B while taking account of outside factors such as wind direction and trajectory of the bullet. In the Korosuu novel, he even shows his disinterest towards Hayami’s suggestion of using his “intuition” to shoot because it clashes with his extremely calculated sniping method.

Although he never brags about it, Chiba is rightfully proud of his skills and despises it when his abilities gets undermined and ridiculed to the point that he becomes very petty about it. When the Legendary Sniper called him a hindrance after giving him a warning shot in chapter 5 of the Korosuu novel, Chiba meticulously instructed Hayami to shoot back at the sniper out of pure spite.

His learned tendency to swallow his concerns when in the middle of a job makes other people mistake him for someone who always hides what he feels. But the surprising truth is that Chiba finds it easy to be completely transparent about his feelings, especially with how self-aware he actually was. Right after the Island assassination attempt was deemed a failure, Chiba wasted no time asking Ritsu to confirm what he had observed during the assassination attempt. He did not hesitate to express the pride and confidence he always has in his skills from how extremely well he typically does in rehearsals and practice sessions, as well as the growing pressure he felt from not wanting to let others down finally dawning on him the second he was about to pull the trigger.

By the time he returned to the hotel, Chiba was able to navigate through his feelings and let them out in the open for Ritsu and the others nearby to hear. Throughout the entire infiltration, Chiba did not once think back to his prior failure, more concerned with what is currently happening around him, like Korosensei entrusting him and Hayami to use real guns, which he finds to be an absurd thing for a teacher to do. Chiba’s method of instantly facing his feelings after the concerned matter is done with is what allows him to move forward without regrets.

Ever since the pep talk Korosensei gave to them, Chiba slowly began to voice out his concerns and share the details he had observed more often. It later turns out that he deeply respects Hazama because the ease she has to string her words together outloud with hardly any care about what others may think was something he couldn't replicate himself.

In Korotan B, Chiba noticed the direction of the conversation he and Puey were having and thus tried his luck to ask about the boy’s backstory while he was still being talkative. When the class became divided in whether they wanted to continue the assassination or not after learning the truth about Korosensei, Chiba volunteered to be the first to pick his side with no hesitation, which was the Kill Team. He expressed that he had long decided on what he wanted to do and will go through with it.

A rather hidden side of him was that he is an adrenaline junkie who gets very excited at the notion of doing something fear-inducing and borderline dangerous, like going to space or riding intense amusement park rides. He has a liking towards intense things in general, given his love for hardcore punk and metal bands.

Navigation

Chiba Ryuunosuke Masterlist

Differentiating Chiba and Hayami's sniping methods using MBTI

This panel of Chiba and Nakamura I found interesting

[chaotic-dumbass-witch]

hey besties. just remembered its canada day

so this year, let’s not forget that quebec is putting law 96 into effect. this will make access to post secondary schooling in english much more difficult and force people to learn french, which is a lot more complicated than english is. let’s remember that this not only affects those who have english as a primary language, but also those who have other maternal languages: this will massively affect immigrants, poc, indigenous peoples, and other at risk communities. protecting languages is important, but french is neither endangered nor disappearing, while indigenous languages aren’t the least bit protected - or even acknowledged - as languages in this country. not only will this make studying in english a lot more difficult, but it may also prohibit doctors from speaking to patients in english, it will add a mandatory “french exit exam” on top of the already present “english exit exam” for every college level student, it will put a lot of teachers out of a job, and force students to take a minimal number of courses in french every single semester. up until this law, you need to pass 2 french classes during college/cegep. as someone whose second language is french, and whose third language is english, i am very aware that french tends to be harder, and this will affect a lot of people.

here's resources to learn about this law: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20

let’s not forget how canada’s hidden its horrible history in terms of missing and murdered indigenous women and girls along the years. let’s not forget about the hiding of all the indigenous kids who never got to go home from residential schools, and all the parents who never got to see their kids again. let’s not forget that a large percentage of reservations don’t have potable water and are under advisories. let’s not forget how canada fucked over the Inuit some decades ago. let’s also not forget that food is extremely expensive in remote areas and around reserves, and because of this, many indigenous communities struggle with food insecurity. let’s also keep in mind that housing for indigenous peoples is often very inadequate, with rodent and insect infestations, mold problems, etc. let’s not forget how indigenous peoples have disproportionately high rates of mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, PTSD, general suicidality, as well as the fact that those communities face substance abuse issues.

here's resources to learn about this: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20

let’s not forget that indigenous peoples and poc are also more likely to be discriminated against in the medical community. there have been many cases of indigenous people going to the hospital and being insulted, mocked, etc. by medical personnel. there have been many cases of medical personnel disregarding their indigenous patients concerns and directly causing said patients death or harm because of the doctors disregard for their health. many indigenous people have actually said that they are less likely to seek medical help for fear of being discriminated against or even forcibly sterilized without consent.

here's a few more resources: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20

let’s also remember that racism, classism, ableism, etc. is extremely real in canadian society. this is especially true when it comes to cops. let’s remember that canadian society is heavily dependent on capitalism. let’s remember that canada is an extremely flawed and fucked up country, it’s just a little better at hiding things than other places may be.

let’s remember that the fact that the us gov is going back on roe v wade makes it more likely that, in the case of a conservative government being elected in canada, the government here may also take away abortion rights, which are also extremely necessary for at risk communities and especially poc.

i love poutine as much as the next guy, but this canada day, let’s not forget all the people that canada fucked over and will keep fucking over in the future. this canada day, if you can, give money or offer help to an indigenous person, an immigrant, a poc.

educate yourself through online textbook pdfs, lectures by indigenous people, learn about indigenous communities, about the names of different tribes, about the housing issues both on reserve and off, the complications they face in the medical field, about the likelihood of health issues, read about the effects of substance abuse on their communities, learn about how their right to bodily autonomy has been fucked over time and time again. learn about whose land you live on, because unless you're indigenous, it isn't your land. learn everything you can and do what you can about it. educate others. it shouldnt only be up to indigenous influencers to educate you, but you should follow indigenous people on instagram, twitter, tumblr, tiktok, etc. if you have access to academic sources, read them. go to the local library. open up the search bar of your schools online database and look through it. talk to indigenous people.

hold this country responsible for its actions and decisions.

[acrosol]

minatozaki sana  24  female  she/her — ; where do you get your inspiration, ito yua ? you’re so intelligent , i can’t help but think of running ink on paper and dirty fingerprints on glasses when i hear your name. your friends tell me you can be dishonest sometimes . i guess it’s understandable given the circumstances . besides , i can’t even imagine how stressful physics classes must be — not to mention you’re also in seolhwayeon (captain) ! you’re a local , right ? yeah , i thought so . either way , welcome to mugunghwa !  

hello everyone!! i'm may and i'm very excited to share my version of ito yua♡ i hope i'll do the canon justice ;-; psa: i haven't properly roleplayed in a little while and i am currently very confused by the new editor TT so please excuse any technical difficulties that may be happening with my posts in the future, i'm still learning how to use this abomination !

also, i actually decided to not set too much muse information in stone this time, so there can hopefully still be plenty of space to develop her character further with the help of plotting and whatnot ! so, instead i have only gathered some rather lose bullet points about her instead which you can read about below ♡

PAST

back in high school, yua's friends often used to joke about the fact that she must be the first "prodigy child" who hated being called just that. sure, to them it seemed like yua had always been exceptionally smart and thus easily excelled in most classes but it wasn't as easy as it looked like.

in contrary to popular belief, she wasn't as gifted as she seemed and had to spend absolutely all of her free time studying for upcoming tests and exams. whenever anyone asked her to hang out, she would simply claim she had a lot of extracurricular activities going on until someday people stopped asking her to hang out at all.

her classmates soon began to label her as snooty and uppish since she must have felt like she was too good for everyone else if she never had time to get to know the other people in her classes. and what started out rather harmless somehow snowballed into a bigger problem until the entire year started to avoid yua altogether.

she tried to play it off and pretend that it didn't phase her when in reality, yua's high school years turned out to be incredibly lonely. however, the lack of friends around her made it easier to drown herself in books and just like that, she still became valedictorian.

in 2021 during her second year of uni, she decided to take a break and study abroad for a while, opting for an art school. however, she quickly realised that the arts weren't exactly her cup of tea, so instead she spent most of her time there with her new girlfriend. it was the first and only time in her life where her studies weren't the most important thing to her.

PRESENT

today, yua still normally keeps to herself. there are definitely still a few people who believe her to be too full of herself to pay attention to anyone else but it seems like most people pay her no mind.

since she hardly had any friends growing up, she found comfort in seeking academic validation. it is the only thing that seems to bring her true joy, but she still whole-heartedly wishes she was more popular, even if she would never admit it.

in an attempt to find some friends to spend time with, she joined the taekwondo club. much to her surprise, it worked better than expected and she was soon asked to be the captain. it was only a small thing, but in that moment yua had never felt more popular.

yua is well aware of the fact that she is technically part of the keepers but she would never call herself a member: to her it just seems like a waste of time ... which is why she's almost never seen around the group.

something most people wouldn't know about her is the fact that even if yua looks like she isn't paying attention, she definitely still is aware of her surroundings. after all, her years spent in solitude moulded her into a perfect observer. even if she would never dare talk about the things she hears and sees ... it doesn't mean that she doesn't know about a couple of secrets here and there.

aaaaaand this is everything i have so far!! please let me know by liking this post if you would like to plot ♡ i also have discord if that's easier for some of you, so please don't hesitate to ask for my user !

[kuniyaias]

How to write answers for the UPSC IAS Mains exam?

Answer writing is the most crucial aspect of UPSC IAS Exam preparation. It is the very factor that can make you or break you. I cannot stress more than to say that if studying is 50% important and rest 50% is answer writing.

When you will write the mains paper, it the way you produce your answer which will be judged. Even though you have immense knowledge but you cannot reproduce it on paper then that knowledge is of no use in Mains examination. As much as you have to know the answers, you must also know how to write the answers.

Writing an effective answer for the UPSC IAS Mains Exam requires a combination of thorough understanding, critical thinking, and clear articulation. Here's a comprehensive guide to help you ace your answer writing:

Understand the Question Thoroughly:

The very first step is to identify your enemy – i.e. question. Only after reading the question carefully, you will be able to know the exact demand of the question.

Second step is to identify the keywords and directives in the question, such as "analyze," "discuss," or "critically examine." Based on these keywords you have to write the answer fulfilling the exact demand of the question.

Krishnadeva Raya, the King of Vijayanagar, was not only an accomplished scholar himself but was also a great patron of learning and literature. Discuss.

In the above question, you have to write about the Krishnadeva Raya

His own achievements in literary fields

His act of giving patronage to learning and literature

Only after clearly understating the question you can write good answers.

Structure Your Answer:

Once you have got the basic idea of demand of the question, follow a well-structured format to present your ideas logically and coherently.

Start with a clear and concise introduction that introduces the topic, provides context, and outlines your main points.

Incorporate current events, government policies, and global trends to demonstrate your awareness of contemporary issues wherever possible. This will give some extra edge and you can gain few extra marks.

Develop the body paragraphs by elaborating on each main point, supporting your arguments with relevant facts, examples, and evidence.

Conclude by summarizing the key points and reiterating your stance on the issue.

Read the following question and identify the basic keywords. Then read the answer you will get good understanding of what I am talking about.

How far “Municipal Finances is a key factor determining the success of achieving the goals of development and economic growth by municipal governance”? Elaborate.

Model Answer:

The 74th Constitution Amendment Act 1992 mandates the setting up and devolution of powers to ULBs as the lowest unit of governance in cities and towns.

The health of municipal finances is a critical element of municipal governance, which will determine whether India realizes her economic and developmental promise.

Importance of Municipal Finances:

Improving municipal finance is central to the achievement of India’s economic growth objectives.

A robust municipal finance system is necessary for effective implementation and management of India’s urban policy agenda.

Sound municipal finance is a pre-requisite for improved service delivery.

Challenges faced by Urban Local Bodies (ULBs):

The most serious problem faced by urban local bodies is the acute shortage of finances. City municipalities do not collect enough taxes, even as the Economic Survey 2019 pointed out that municipalities do not realize the full potential of property tax.

Strict control exercised by the state government over urban local bodies prove to be more of a curse than a boon because instead of providing guidance and support, the control turns out to be restrictive and impeding.

Urban local bodies have suffered constant postponement of elections for indefinite lengths of time.

The failure of municipal governance is one of the biggest reasons for the poor condition of Indian cities. Often the governance is impacted due to disputes between the elected Mayor and appointed Municipal Commissioner.

Corruption, favoritism, and nepotism are rampant in the urban local bodies, they also have less power to fight all these issues.

Often there is great neglect in the implementation of the Master Plan. In a few cities the Master plan is still not worked out and thus cities grow as an accident than planning.

Poor coordination among the Center-State and various local bodies and parastatal bodies lead to poor implementation of urban policies and poor urban governance.

Conclusion:

For effective municipal governance, the health of municipal finance is a critical element that will determine whether India realizes its economic and development goals.

Maintain Clarity and Conciseness:

Avoid beating around the bush. Answer the question directly and explicitly.

Use simple, direct language that is easy for the examiner to understand.

Avoid overly complex sentences, jargon, and unnecessary technical terms.

Strive for brevity and focus on conveying your ideas clearly without being verbose.

Maintain a consistent flow of thought and avoid abrupt transitions between ideas.

Now the core question is how you will learn these skills?

The answer is by practice. Only practicing regularly can help you, there is no magic, only hard work. First step should be to go through previous year questions and try to decode the keywords, demand of the question etc.

Then as you will cover your syllabus you will get better understanding of the questions and their demands. At this stage you should start writing answers. Initially it will take hours to complete just one answer, but gradually you will perfect this skill.

You can also join some test series of reputed UPSC Coaching. This provides accountability framework and you will be bound to write. This provides additional benefit of getting you copies evaluated and consequently work upon your weaknesses.

Lastly, you need immense will power to start and sustain the habit of answer writing as without it you can achieve your dream of becoming a civil servant.

Best of Luck.

[the-letter-horror-lover]

Boruto What Did You Do! by PeachCandyWrappers

Anime » Naruto Rated: T, English, Adventure, Naruto U., Boruto U., Sarada U., Mitsuki, Words: 3k+, Favs: 53, Follows: 67, Published: Nov 14, 2016

14

A/N:

This fanfiction is an AU, I am well aware that the original Boruto hasn't unlocked the byakugan yet but in this fanfiction i'm saying that Hinata and Hiashi trained him in both the gentle fist and helped him work with his byakugan. Also he has pale eyes like regular Hyuugas not Naruto's eyes. Also I'm writing this AU so the time is set before the movie. I've watched the movie and I think I died of second hand embarrassment over the fuck shit Boruto did during the chunin exams. Shikadai ftw.

Anyway you know the deal, none of this other than the writing itself belongs to me.

There were very few things that Boruto hated more than the phrase, "Sorry Bolt, Tou-san has work to do." It was aggravating, infuriating, and every time it was uttered it made him want to choke someone. Which was why he had taken every ounce of anger he had and shoved it into his training, in secret. Oh he knew there was no way he wasn't stalked by ANBU every time he left the house but no one other than the ANBU and his family (to an extent) knew of his training. Not even Konohamaru-sensei.

So when he was forced to spend the entire day doing D-ranks, he was more than ready to shove all his quickly building anger into training. Did he have anger issues? Quite possibly, however he didn't really care, it's not like he was going to go see the Yamanaka for something that motivated him to train. He was almost bursting at the seams trying to dash to training ground 42, a training ground that was avoided like the plague due to some superstitious rumor about the shinigami themself dragging you into hell. Bullshit to that, it was perfect for training without being interrupted. But as of the present, he wasn't there yet. He was still ignoring the droning of his father's shadow clone, assigning the latest Team 7 their new D-rank. He shifted his eyes a little, scoffing inwardly at Sarada's star struck look. Really, in his opinion Sarada's obsession with his father was a fool's quest and sort've creepy for that matter. His eyes then landed on Mitsuki, whose golden eyes sparkled with amusement at his dismissive attitude toward his father. Boruto raised a single eyebrow in questioning. Mitsuki shook his head, the action unnoticable if you weren't actively searching for a response.

Boruto left with his team, emotionlessly weeding the garden, robotically picking out the items assigned from the grocery store, and dispassionately marching up a tree to grab the escaped cat (thankfully not Tora). His pale eyes were detached and looked dead, his body was almost moving instinctively at this point.

"Oi, Bolt, what's wrong with you today? You're acting like Uncle Sai but worse." Sarada punched him lightly in the shoulder, a teasing grin decorating her face. Mitsuki leaned in, "He's probably distracted by that girl we saw at the supermarket, I think I heard Sensei wolf whistle." he stated with a placid smile on his face.

Sarada whipped around, incredulity written on her face, "Nani?! What girl? Sensei wolf whistled?" Mitsuki shrugged, and chuckled lightly when Sensei flicked the back of his head.

"That's enough of that Mitsuki." he chided jokingly, a small blush on his face as he looked away.

"Ha ha very funny," Boruto scoffed, walking away from the team in the opposite direction of training ground 42.

"Wait where are you going! We still need to report to the Hokage after a finished mission!" Sarada called after him.

"The clone won't care whether i'm there or not, you guys can go on your own." he yelled over his shoulder, his hands behind his head in a uncaring manner. Inside him however, he was practically raging. He was beyond ticked off, his anger had just kept building after this morning's lecture on the importance of D-rank missions. He really needed to blow off some steam, and fast.

"Ah young master, would you be interested in our newest product? It lets you copy any jutsu-"

"Yeah that's great, whatever." the fuck off was implied. He should've just traveled by rooftop, no pesky advertising civilians there. Slipping into a vacated alleyway, he walked up the walls and quickly sprinted with all he had across the roofs of Konoha. He wasn't in the mood to play, he wasn't before and he wasn't now.

Finally arriving in his training ground, he quickly did his stretches, making sure he didn't pull a muscle during training. Slipping naturally into the rigid form of the gentle fist, he burst into movement, mentally mapping out all 361 of the tenketsu points that the robot dummy didn't have. He rarely used the gentle fist when venting his anger because he needed a near surgical amount of chakra control and focus, something that didn't come easily to him. However logically, if he practiced the gentle fist while he was angry, he would get experience on keeping his emotions in check and focusing with internal distractions. That being said, as the gentle fist taijutsu style was practically a glorified poking fest, it was not in anyway satisfying unless he was against a real person. He set himself to practice one hour of gentle fist, and then he would practice his kaiten.

Kaiten, a technique passed down only between the members of the main house, and luckily enough he was considered an honorary main house member thanks to his mother's insistence. Surprisingly, his grandfather didn't hate him. Sure, his way of showing affection was by gut loading him with jutsus and techniques. But Boruto wasn't complaining at all, in fact he got along quite well with his grandfather if he did say so himself. They played Go, Shogi, and had tea together when he had the time. He was currently in the process of learning the eight trigrams and according to his grandfather his progress was adequate enough to receive a brand new set of shuriken and kunai. Now that he thought about it… it was actually kind of sad to receive more attention from your grandfather than your own father.

The fastest recorded speed of the Kaiten was 1200 km/h (745.6 mph) as of now he was too slow. He needed to be faster, it was crucial for nearly all of his techniques, including the eight trigrams. Hell, he was so desperate he went to Lee-san once.

Never again.

He shuddered at the remembrance of the kill-me-now shade of green and orange that he wore. Add that color to spandex? And you get the love child of Satan and a carrot.

Quickly shaking his head to rid himself of his thoughts he went deeper into the forest that Training Ground 42 provided. His aim was to hopefully increase the range of his byakugan as he could only see about 50 to 60 meters, 70 if he was pushing it. His mother could see almost 10 kilometers. It was absolutely mind blowing how far her range was. A small, childish part of him was filled with jealousy but then he was reminded of how his mother went through all the shit she did and suddenly his jealousy left him.

Activating his byakugan, his world once again turned into headache inducing grayscale and blue. He was about to go and practice hitting tenketsu points on the boar he saw to the west, however a shimmering glimmer to the east caught his attention.

"What in kami's name..." he mumbled as he ran toward the shine, extremely wary as to what had caught his attention.

"No way." he breathed in disbelief as he got closer and it was a rock, shining chakra. He would've noticed if it was a person disguised as a rock, and even then it was extremely hard to be disguised as an object the size of a tennis ball. He stopped at a good distance from the rock, wary of fuinjutsu traps. It was the only other explanation to the chakra on the rock. However why would anyone put a seal on a rock in the middle of a barely used training ground? I snagged a nearby squirrel and chucked it at the rock. Cruel, yes, but better it then him. The squirrel chattered angrily and scampered away unharmed.

Cocking his head to the side in obvious confusion Boruto inched closer and closer, ready to spring at any moment. Annoyance coursed through him in the form of a tic mark on his forehead, where were the damn ANBU when you needed them? He tucked his hand into his sleeve and grabbed the rock carefully, making sure not to have skin contact with the potentially dangerous rock. Taking a closer look, his eyes widened at the intricate golden carvings lacing through the shiny blue rock. It was beautiful, complex and elegant in every way. Taking out a handkerchief that Kaa-san had embroidered for him, he wrapped it and tucked it in the ninja pouch around his leg.

Only to forget it's very existence.

=========time skip 2 months==========

"I'm enrolling you brats in the next chunin exams." Sensei declared dramatically, gripping Boruto in a headlock and ruffling his hair.

"Sensei! Get off me dattebasa!" he shouted indignantly. Sarada snickered,

"You look like a baby chicken with his feathers ruffled." she commented smugly.

"Fuck off Salad." he shot back with no real heat behind it. Mitsuki simply smiled while Sarada puffed up in anger.

"Don't call me-" she started, however Konohamaru-sensei had (thankfully) shut her up by clearing his throat.

"Ahem, anyway the exams are in two weeks," he crossed his arms in a challenging position, "I don't expect a ragtag group like you guys to get promoted, hell I doubt you all will make it to the third stage."

Mitsuki's golden eyes glinted dangerously at the dare, while Boruto positively bristled. Sarada however, stepped forward with her arms cross in a mirror position to her sensei's.

"I guess we'll have to wait and see, won't we." Her onyx eyes were steeled with determination and her could've sworn that he saw flames flickering in her eyes.

Sensei smirked, leaning down to her eye level.

"I guess so."

Boruto fell back, sweating heavily. A wide grin split across his face as he fell back into the ground with a proud laugh.

"I did it! I fucking did it dattebasa!"

He pumped his arm into the air, a victorious 'whoop' leaving his lips. He was dirty, sweaty, bloody, and chakra depleted but he had finally succeeded in performing the Kaiten.

If possible, his smile stretched further, with one thought going through his head.

'Watch out shitty old man, you won't know what hit you.'

As his vision faded into darkness he vaguely noted an ANBU agent above him.

"The chunin exams will now begin. Everyone who is participating please join the rest of the participants in the center." The announcer's disgustingly happy voice sounded through the area. Boruto cringed at the grating sound, it was so obviously fake that he wanted to puke.

"Here we go" Sarada smiled nervously, breathing deeply to calm herself. Mitsuki seemed as calm as ever as he walked on Sarada's left. Boruto was walking on her right, wordlessly handing her a bottle of cold water. She nodded gratefully, taking a swing and tossing it back.

"Every genin team will stand together on the side that they believe is the correct answer. " Sai-san explained, shooting his hand up to draw attention to the screen which flashed the question,

"In the fifth volume of the "Shinobi Strategist Detective Story", True or False, the passwords in volume 5 are as follows:"

"Moon is day, Mountain is river, and Flower is Nectar."

Boruto scrunched his face up in confusion, "The first round of the chunin exams is to answer a true or false question about so no name book that nobody has ever heard of or read?"

Sarada looked at him seriously, "Boruto, which answer do you think my father would choose?"

"Eh?" he asked, confused by the sudden question, "I don't really talk that often with Mr. Sasuke but he's kind've the unconventional type so I'm assuming false. What's with the question?"

"I'm going to be Hokage someday, and in order to do that i'll have to be different from my father." Sarada looked him straight in the eyes, her own obsidian orbs burning with sheer willpower.

"So we'd go with true." Mitsuki chimed in, already on his way toward the platform reserved for those who thought true was the correct answer.

Boruto sweatdropped, "Sheesh flipping a coin would've gotten us a more logical answer than that." he muttered.

"What was that?!" Sarada yelled back from her position in front of him.

"Nothing, nothing."

"The answer to the question was..."

The screen rapidly flipped between x and o, only to land on both. In a split second, the ground beneath them ripped and all the contestants fell in the massive pit. Thinking fast, Boruto quickly channeled chakra to his hands and feet, managing to catch himself at the last moment, allowing Sarada to grab onto both Mitsuki and himself with her ninja wire. Peering down below him, he saw that the bottom was layered in a pool of black ink, covering the unfortunate souls who fell.

"That was close." he breathed, chuckling lightly from the unexpected adrenaline rush. Sarada hummed in agreement, staring down into the black ink below.

The second trial was capture the flag but with weapons and ninjutsu. Everything was allowed except for leaving the enclosed area.

"Sarada, stay and guard our flag, call us if you need backup. I'll go scout for a flag with Mitsuki." Sarada opened her mouth to argue but Boruto activated his byakugan, making a silent point. She backed off reluctantly, huffing slightly.

"Let's head north, there's an average chakra signature there and there doesn't seem to be any backup nearby."

"We're counting on you Sarada." Mitsuki commented.

"Sarada! Three enemies to your 6 o'clock-" Boruto yelled into the headset, warning her of the enemies.

"Mitsuki!" Boruto gave a silent request to his white haired partner, who was already heading back to give her support.

"I'll handle the retrieval, Sarada hang in there until Mitsuki gets back."

"Yeah, yeah! I got this, there's no reason to be so upset-" the sound of metal clashing against metal. "It's just three-" more metal clashes and yells, "Idiots from the hidden mist!"

Boruto gnawed on his teeth but relaxed as he saw Mitsuki return. Muting his headset to sneak up on the opposing nin, he crouched behind the broken vent. Thankfully it wasn't a Konoha genin so the flag was fair game. To be fair, the guy probably deserved to have his flag taken, the failure of a ninja didn't even notice Boruto was there. He shot forward, sweeping the guy from behind, only to have him jump. It was some no name Iwa nin.

"Argh! What the-" Boruto shot forward again, aiming for the tenketsu point on the back of his knee. As the tap landed, the Iwa nin let out a howl of pain, his right leg locking up and refusing to move.

"Fuck! You son of a bitch that fucking hurt!" his opponent slashed and hacked at Boruto with his tanto. Boruto dodged and weaved, finally hitting the pressure point at the base of the neck and forcing the Iwa nin unconscious.

"Che, that was pathetic." the scoffed unmuting his headset and heading back towards home base with a red flag in hand.

"I take it you have the flag?" Sarada's voice sounded from the other side.

"That's right, how's it going on your side?" Boruto asked.

"Can't you just see it with your byakugan?" Sarada muttered unhappily.

"Just because you can't use the sharingan as well as I can my byakugan doesn't give you a right to vent on me." he smirked, his voice light and teasing.

"Aren't you two getting along just fabulously, like an old married couple." Mitsuki deadpanned.

"Shut up Mitsuki." they hissed synonymously.

"Would you look at that," Boruto mused, "I'm up against Shikadai." Sarada looked at the match board and whistled sympathetically.

"That's not going to be easy, he's the smartest kid in our generation." she patted him on the shoulder, "Good luck Bolt, I bet he can't even back out of the exams like he wants to because the Godaime Kazekage is watching."

"Oh shit."

"Yeah good luck."

"The match between Nara Shikadai and Uzumaki Boruto will begin in 3, 2, 1, HAJIME!"

Boruto launched forward, immediately falling into the gentle fist style like usual. His byakugan was on full force and he was fully aware of all the streaks of shadows snaking towards him.

"Did your mom make you do this?" Boruto asked, pity coloring his voice.

"Don't you know it." Shikadai grumbled, spiking the shadows upwards. "It's even worse because apparently both my uncles are gambling on this match."

Boruto danced around the spikes, trying to get closer to the Nara child. "Gaara-san gambles?" incredulity was clearly written on his whiskered face.

"Like you wouldn't believe." Shikadai was almost whining at this point.

"Man that sucks, sorry about that." Boruto was nearly there, but it was incredibly difficult to corner someone in a round arena.

"I wouldn't pity me if I were you, I heard both your dad and you grandfather-" Shikadai dodged a volley of kunai, "gambled on your win."

Boruto nearly tripped and fell, allowing the shadows to edge dangerously close, "Grandfather gambled?!"

Shikadai shrugged, sending doton pillars toward the two whiskered child. "That's what I heard from my dad." Boruto ran up the pillars and used them as a platform to rocket toward the pineapple haired kid, who kept jumping back, putting distance between the two. Boruto smirked as he saw the shadows edging in on him from all sides. This was the perfect chance!

"KAITEN!"

The moment Shikadai and Bolt started the casual conversation about their relatives gambling, multiple faces palms and sweat drops were spread across the audience. Including one Hiashi Hyuuga who tried as hard as he could to edge away from both his daughter's accusing stares in the most dignified manner possible. The same could be said for the two sand brothers who could feel Temari's heated glares hitting them. Shikamaru ran a tired hand over his face,

"Goddammit Shikadai." he groaned. Naruto, who had his head buried in his hands gave an agreeing moan of despair.

"KAITEN!"

Every single person watching went completely rigid as they watched the son of the Nanadaime Hokage perform a technique not normally accessible until high chunin or jounin at least. Jaws dropped as they saw Boruto spin in a ball of chakra, deflecting every single strand of shadows and zoom towards Shikadai.

"Kaiten? Hinata taught him the Kaiten?!" Naruto slammed his hands on the railing, his voice tight as he was forcefully reminded of Neji. All the Hyuuga in the audience nearly lost their composure as some of the less composed members cheered and hollered in approval.

Hiashi sat back, a proud smile on his face as Hanabi had the widest grin since her sister's wedding.

"Neji-niisan" Hinata whispered happily, her matching pale eyes laden with tears.

"Holy shit..." Sarada whispered, and Mitsuki couldn't help but agree.

Shikadai's eyes widened considerably, scrambling to get out of the way of the spinning ball of destruction.

"Boruto! I surrender!" he yelled, almost collapsing in relief when Boruto slowed to a stop, panting heavily.

Boruto stopped, almost depleted of chakra when he jerked back as the blue stone from earlier flung out of his pouch powered by the momentum left behind from the Kaiten. Instinctively, he reached out to grab it only to realise his mistake as time slowed down.

"AAAHHHHHGGG!"

Hot, liquid pain coursed through every single one of his nerves as he screamed. Bright, glowing gold invaded his vision as he felt almost as if he was getting ripped apart atom by atom. Vaguely he could feel someone grab onto him and scream his name but he was far from the point of focusing on anything other than the agony he was being forced into. Unconsciousness was bliss for him as he greedily welcomed Morpheus' embrace.

Everything happened in a split second, when Shikadai surrendered Naruto was ready to cheer and rub his victory into Gaara's face. Only to be cut off by the most pained scream he had ever heard in his life. Well, that may not be true however he was nearly driven insane by the scream. His son, his flesh and blood, someone who he had sworn to protect in anyway possible, screaming in pain like that. He didn't even know what was happening. Boruto was glowing and writhing on the ground. Naruto let out an agonized yell as he saw in closer detail that his son was disintegrating into a shower of gold dust.

"BORUTO!" he screamed as he leaped over the railing and shot toward his son as fast as possible, Sarada was already at his side trying to get rid of whatever he was holding onto.

"Sarada don't touch him!" Mitsuki yelled as his extended arm tried to drag Sarada back.

In a yellow flash and golden sparkles, the Nanadaime Hokage and the genin of team 7 were gone.

And everything erupted into pandemonium.

[prismatic-bell]

Hi,

This might be a strange question but it's something that's been on my mind recently. Is there any way that gentiles can help Jewish classmates (or any classmates that are religious but not christian) in situations where professors assign homework or exams on holidays? Is that something that we should bring up to professors even if we don't know if anyone in the class celebrates that holiday? Or is there a way that we can support classmates who speak up about needing to given time to celebrate their faith?

I'm sorry if this is awkwardly worded. I just want to know if there's anything I can do in the future to help in those kinds of situations. I don't want to step on any toes, but I also don't want my classmates to feel like they would be on their own if they spoke up. I know it might be difficult to do anything during the pandemic since I don't really know my classmates, so if you have any suggestions as to ways to help after the pandemic that would be great too.

First of all, this is like Allyship 101: “how can I help those who need this help?” So, A+ to you, friend.

The holidays you’re most likely going to run into problems with, at least for Jews (I encourage my siblings from other religions to chime in), will be Pesach and the High Holy Days. Pesach is juuuuuuust before Easter, and I know when I was in college it was quite common to get midterms that week. The High Holy days consist of three days within a ten-day span: Rosh Hashanah, Erev Yom Kippur (which some Jews may refer to as “Kol Nidre,” as this is the main prayer said during that service), and Yom Kippur. You know how there are Christmas and Easter Christians? You never see them in church except on Christmas Eve and Easter morning, but dammit you will always see them on those two days? Yeah, there are Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur Jews. Synagogues will overflow capacity trying to accommodate all who want to attend, and in many cases tickets may be required simply because there aren’t enough seats to safely hold all comers My sister’s synagogue has three chapels, and still has to double up services (as in, every prayer service is performed twice) to accommodate all attendees on these holidays.

I’m Reform, meaning there are a lot of mitzvot I don’t follow. Even so, here are just some of the restrictions I face on Yom Kippur:

--I cannot fast due to medical problems, but I am restricted to very small amounts of plain food (I usually have plain rice and a couple of tablespoons of peanut butter on the side for two tiny meals between services; maybe a small amount of plain chicken). Most people fast from both food and water for 25 hours.

--I can’t wear “nice” clothes. This doesn’t mean I don’t dress up--it means I shouldn’t wear anything that would encourage slouching, lounging, relaxing, etc. The focus of Yom Kippur and Erev Yom Kippur is study, reflection, and repentance--not luxury. You are expected to be uncomfortable. That’s the point.i

--There are five prayer services on Yom Kippur. I’m supposed to attend all of them. (I . . . won’t lie, I often skip the family service. It’s a rehash for the little kids about what Yom Kippur actually is, it’s about 45 minutes long, and it’s usually when I take my second meal.) It comprises about six hours’ worth of prayers, while Kol Nidre evening is about another two. Rosh Hashanah isn’t quite that intense; it’s more like four hours. Again, though, I’m Reform--Orthodox Jews may spend the entire twenty-five hours of Yom Kippur praying.

As you can imagine, the day of and the day after these services, I’m wiped. I don’t want to work. I don’t want to cook. I don’t want to do house chores. I want to rest, and I want to eat things that aren’t plain rice.

So what can you do?

First, I recommend a calendar app. My phone very considerately tells me when the holidays are, because the Jewish calendar is lunisolar and the dates change from year to year. You can also just . . . look up a Jewish calendar online. Keep in mind that the Jewish religious day runs from sunset to sunset, not from dawn to dawn. So for example, according to my phone, today was the first day of Chanukkah. In reality, we lit the first candle last night, because 25 Kislev began at 5:20 on 10 December. Almost all modern calendars will mark the first “full” day of the holiday, not its actual start the evening before, so keep that in mind.

Next, you may wish to ask directly on the first day of class if you see something concerning on the syllabus: “what is your policy for accommodation of religious observance?” IT IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT THAT YOU USE THE WORDS “ACCOMMODATION OF RELIGIOUS OBSERVANCE.” A secular Jew may wish to go home for Pesach even though they don’t believe in the story of the Exodus, and they should be allowed to do that without having to justify it in the same way as all the “well it’s not really about Jesus anymore, it’s a time for family” Christmas-observers, but that phrase up there is a magical phrase that means they are protected from discrimination if they choose to do that. Make the professor tell the entire class what the plan is. If you have an asshole who says they make no exception for religious observance, you can do one of two things: challenge the professor directly (”sir, are you aware that’s against the law?”), or go directly to the dean or principal. Be aware that you may face some backlash from the professor if they’re particularly petty, so keep an organized copy of all assignment rubrics and what you’ve turned in. That way if that backlash comes out in your grade, you can challenge it.

Now let’s say the teacher was thoughtless. I would like to draw a distinction here between “thoughtless” and “malicious” because as an ally, one is much easier to deal with than the other. “Thoughtless” can be approached thus: the prof tells you all the midterm essay will be assigned next Wednesday. You raise your hand and say “Sir? That’s Rosh Hashanah, people might not be here.” Your prof, who was thoughtless, goes “oh. All right, let me see” and looks over his notes and says “then let’s give the assignment next Monday. You’ll have two extra days to work on it, so make good use of them.” That is a good response to a mistake. A malicious response would basically be “too bad, so sad,” and you should go to the dean. Even if there are no Jews in your class, that attitude will 1) dissuade Jews from taking the class in the future and 2) potentially cause a lot of problems for the school, which the dean would really like to avoid.

Finally: if a classmate speaks up and says those words for themselves, and the professor is less than supportive, this is where you’re gonna have to grab onto your ovaries or testicles or whatever your personal body part of great courage is, and get confrontational:

“Professor, we get off automatically for our holiday. She should be allowed to celebrate too.”

Or even, if needed:

“Professor, that is discrimination.”

Keep in mind that last one may net you a very negative reaction if you have to use it. If a professor is nasty enough to go “I don’t give a shit” when presented with the problem in the first place, they may well be nasty enough to yell at you and criticize you in front of the class. Be ready for this, and realize it is not an attack on your character--it’s a reflection of the professor’s. They know they have no argument, so they’ll just try to cow you into silence. Stand your ground. If you are firm in your defense of your classmate, others may step up. Even if they don’t help you in that initial confrontation, they may offer to be witnesses if you take the matter to the dean. Make sure you introduce yourself to your classmate after the fact, and ask if there’s any further support or help they need. Make it clear that you’re happy to help.

Thank you for speaking up and speaking out. Best of luck to you in your studies!

[with-love-from-hell]

Vermillion Skies - Q&A #2

Thanks for all the love on the series!! Here is another Q&A post for the series, along with some general headcannons!  If you have not read the series yet, be aware there are spoilers ahead! Read under the cut! This one is tailored primarily toward parts 9-15!

CW:  Somewhat graphic discussion of past events in the series thus far [sexual violence, ignoring consent for medical treatment, abortion, death, pap-smear exam, blood/gore/violence among characters, jealousy/romantic rivalry, PTSD, etc…]

>> Though I have a Masters Degree in Psychology, I am not your therapist. If you have experienced any form of sexual abuse, assault, or harassment and are in need of help, please utilize the RAINN sexual assault hotline or online chat service, or find additional help using the NSVRC website. <<

Read all of my work related to Vermillion Skies here

How many parts to the series?

Currently I am planning on 23 parts of the series! This post will take the place of another part for the next week, so I am planning for part 16 to be out by Feb 6th, and then once per week until it is finished (probably every Sunday!). In regards to the NSFW part- I have it sitting finished in my drafts- for those of you who are curios lol. I have currently assigned it as part 21 (but this is subject to change depending on how the preceding parts go). I am glad there is still excitement for this, and I am very happy with how the initial draft turned out prior to edits (:

I know my last few parts have been on the shorter side, and this is mostly due to me being busy with work, and because if I were to smush them together, the parts would be WAY too long. So be on the look out for the future parts being more along the length they had been in the past (e.g. between 5k and 6k words!)

How will Lucifer handle the hallucinations?

I wont say much because I don’t want to spoil the next couple parts, but the hallucinations bit will elaborated on some more. Lucifer will definitely have some conflicts related to his pride about the fact that his psyche was so heavily impacted by the assault, and this may cause some tension between him and Mc. Though again, I don’t want to spoil any more so I will shut up about it. lol

About PTSD

Thank you for this question, because frankly I can never shut the fuck up when giving psychology perspectives on things and you just unlocked that hyperfixation lol. 

In short- I wouldn’t say hallucinations or delusions are either common or uncommon. However, I will say that not every single individual experiences PTSD or trauma responses the same, which is something that I have tried to hammer home with this series. Typically, if someone has been through a very intense traumatic experience, those types of psychotic symptoms can be present as their brain tries to process the events of what happens. Individuals with genetic ties to Schizophrenia can be especially susceptible to experiencing these things! However, I am going to reiterate again that just because you experience delusions or hallucinations doesn’t mean you are a bad or dangerous person, and it is important for those of you without these symptoms to take that to heart!

I am glad you’ve learned a lot about PTSD through my work, and again, I could go on for hours about it because of my specific interest in the disorder! If this is a special interest, I can absolutely open my asks for mental health questions (my areas of interest are Eating Disorders, OCD, and PTSD, but I know quite a bit about many other disorders as well!) 

How Mc’s relationship with Solomon will change.

As mentioned briefly in the last Q&A, Mc’s relationship with Solomon is going to definitely take a pretty hard hit. As of now, this hasn’t been exhibited *too* much, but it will become a more presenting plot point in the next few parts- specifically with how Mc reacts to seeing him again for the first time since Diavolo’s dinner party, and how she still feels in regards to the procedure. Get ready for some angsty dialogue and also some other past plot-points resurfacing...such as “did Solomon aim to get something out of all of this?” 

Will the abortion ever be brought back up?

Yes it will. And that is going to be present within the series very, very soon. 👀

What about the online harassment/rumors? 

Also yes! that will come back into the plot within the near future as well. 

Will Simeon Fall?

I cant say -too- much about this without spoiling the rest of the series and others going forward, but I will say that he will fall at some point! I have something in mind about a spin-off about Simeon and how he processes falling from a more general perspective so it *could* be a stand-alone work if someone did not want to read VS! So...yeah! I wont say how or when, but our lovely little angel will fall. I will also say that I do enjoy the idea of an 8th deadly sin- that being “Despair”, and my plan is to have Simeon embody this sin. I wont say any more though, so you’ll just have to keep reading. 

Will more supporting character perspectives be offered?

The short answer is: yes- to an extent! I do plan on bringing in some other perspectives a bit more!

The long answer is: while I would love to do every single character justice, there just isn’t enough drive for me to elongate the series further by bleeding every character perspective dry. I want to leave some things up for interpretation- which is part of the reason why I don’t go down every single avenue that I could. That being said though, while the main focus is on Lucifer and Mc, there will still continue to be alternative perspectives taken- namely Simeon, Solomon, and Levi. This is mostly because those characters are existing secondary to the plot- especially at the present moment! 

The trajectory of the series

I have been tracking interest in the series basically since I noticed it initially taking off within the fandom. But, Since I hit part 10, engagement has been way down with Vs (and my other works too). I am attributing some of this to the bull crap with Tumblr's algorithm and tagging issues, as this has been a big deal for awhile, in addition to more people leaving the platform- especially considering my follower count is steadily rising. With all of that considered though, I have still struggled with some disappointment for it losing steam, considering how much I love it and how much traction it got within the first 5 parts.

While this series is still a strong comfort for me to write and that is the primary purpose of me continuing to write it, It is still going to go strong, and I am not going to give up on it. However, I am also not going to get every single direction or idea that I have out. I don’t want it to go stale, and as of now I don’t se it hitting there, but I do have a feeling that- based on how often I get asks about the NSFW part- that engagement will drop significantly more after that part. 

I do have plans for another series after this one is complete, but it probably will be similar in length to Blasphemy. I love all of you, and I love this series, so I am going to complete what I have had planned out thus far, but part 23 will be the end outside of *maybe* an epilogue. Thanks again to all of you who continue to engage in my work, and I wanted to give a shout out to all of you who reblog, ask, and comment on it. I see it all and your thoughts mean a lot to me. And as a general message to others- please continue to support artists and writers through likes and reblogs. We wont really know you enjoy our stuff if you just lurk, and this can really impact motivation to create!

[heloisedaphnebrightmore]

Important asset [Billy Russo x Reader]

Title: Important asset Pairing: Billy Russo x Female!Reader Word count: 3k Published: 22 April 2021 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: My first Billy Russo fic, I hope it's not that bad, I'm still trying to get a hold of his character :) Summary: [x] Being a former military personal gives you the opportunity to work for Billy’s company. Becoming a very important part of the company provides you with an even closer relationship with your boss. However, he seems to be deliberately dancing on your nerves, increasing your already built-up frustration.

Ben Barnes and Characters Masterlist

Masterlists | Marvel Characters Masterlist

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Working for Anvil felt like a safe place. After serving your country for years, coming back from your last tour turned out to be more difficult than you could have anticipated. Protecting important personals and working as security wasn’t something you wished to do, but after starting the job, working along with people who have been through what you have, your view of the company has changed. The job was different, but the people you worked with have given you more support than anyone, including your family, friends or your therapist for that matter.

Joining Anvil wasn’t easy, the requirement process raised some issues that you had to overcome. The physical part didn’t offer any difficulty, but the mental exam seemed to present some obstacles. It wasn’t until your second try that you have been approved and joined the team. That was when you met Mr. Russo, CEO and founder of Anvil. He was just as handsome as you have heard, and he had a way with words. He was confident and knew just how to use his charm. Even if you wanted to deny your sudden interest in him, you couldn’t have.

It seemed that even if he didn’t look at you as a woman, he certainly found your abilities interesting. You didn’t just become one with the team, a crucial member, but also became one of Billy’s most important assets. Having both good communications skills and excellent combat skills meant your worth in Billy’s eyes have grown and provided a great deal of opportunity for you to stay beside him. Officially you weren’t an assistant, but unofficially, Billy liked to give you a nice amount of work, keeping you close by from early morning to late afternoon or evening, sometimes past 10pm.

“Mr. Russo,” you called out to him as you walked behind him in a narrow corridor of the Anvil headquarters. Billy turned around, adjusting his tie with a confident smirk across his face. “I heard you were looking for me,” you added as you finally arrived beside him, glancing up at his handsome features, looking very professional in his expensive suit. You wanted to look feminine and pretty, instead of being dirty and sweaty, wearing a pair of tracksuits, but sometimes your work required you to look more worn out than you wished to be. He had a certain aura that kept pulling you towards him, but as confident as you were in your abilities to protect your country and your people, you were just as uncertain about your appearance when you appeared in front of Billy.

“Yes, I have. Care to explain why I can't reach you on your phone?” He asked, his features unimpressed with your lack of availability.

“I was training, I can’t possibly bring my phone with me everywhere,” you replied frowning, but you quickly adjusted your expressions, before he could have scolded you. It was clear that he wasn’t happy with your reply, but he dismissed it after all.

“Come to my office at 1700 hours. I have a couple things to discuss with you,” he replied in an authoritative manner.

“I have to train the new recruits at 4,” you explained, but he just shook his head.

“Ask someone to replace you,” he stated firmly, accepting no objection. But you took your job very seriously and even though Billy was your boss, often you found yourself going against his decisions just to spite him.

“I can’t do that,” you stated, lips pursed to emphasise your objection. “There’s no one to cover me,” you added. His firm stance and sharp inhale reassured you that he was anything but happy with your answer. He took a step forward, forcing you to take a step back and collide with the wall behind you. Your chest felt as though it was a small box, containing only a small portion of oxygen, its lack of tightened your throat, starting your heart off in a dangerous pace, pounding hard against your ribcage. Billy’s presence always made you feel as though you couldn’t breathe. A simple gaze in your direction, a confident grin, his low, deep voice calling your name made you weak at the knees and left your mind wandering to paths you should have never gone to, causing thousands of butterflies to erupt in your belly.

“I’m your boss and I can change your schedule whenever I want to. I want to see you in my office at 1700 sharp, or else—” he didn’t finish the end of his sentence, but you were sure his ideas were entirely different from yours.

“Or else—?” It escaped your mouth involuntarily, receiving a low growl from Billy, a threatening aura, still it didn’t frighten you, if anything it encouraged you further. “I think we both know you will not fire me, Mr. Russo. I’m a very important asset to your company. I am a very dedicated employee and therefore I will try to adjust my schedule to fit your request, but I cannot promise anything, unless you personally can provide someone to take over from me,” you replied in a challenging manner, earning a questioningly raised brow from Billy. Trying to read his face you couldn’t decide if he was actually considering helping you or he was planning how to murder you in the spot.

A heavy sigh left his lungs, but he didn’t back away. “I will send Simon to cover you,” he said between gritted teeth.

“That is absolutely brilliant, I’m so glad we are on the same page,” you exclaimed with a wide grin across your face as you turned around to leave the man behind. However, before you could have left, he grabbed your arm and pulled you back against him, your palms landing on his hard chest, feeling every inch of each fine muscle under your touch.

“Pay attention to your attitude because it has gotten out of hands recently and you are standing on a very fine line,” he whispered, his breath tickling your cheeks. Indeed, you have been rather free with your words and actions around Billy, and you knew you were playing with fire, but it seemed that was the only way to get his attention.

“I might be pushing some boundaries, but my only intention is for the company to work effectively, to produce people that do their tasks efficiently meanwhile wearing Anvil’s name with pride. If I neglect my duties and ignore my job, even if it’s for your request, what use am I to the company?” you asked with a certain pride. Whilst your intention was to object to Billy once again, to be somewhat bratty, every word that left your lips were true. Anvil has given you more than you could have ever wished for and not even Billy could stop you from making this company one of the most well-working organisations.

Billy took a sharp inhale, trying to decide whether you were just being spoilt once again, because you were indeed aware of your own worth, or if the company really took priority in your eyes. His nod reassured you of the latter as he let go of your arm.

“I like the way you are thinking, but it doesn’t excuse your attitude. You are an important asset to the company, but not irreplaceable. By the time you come to see me in the afternoon, try to get rid of it,” he spoke sternly, before he shook his head and offered you a cocky grin as he turned around and left you in the corridor. You couldn’t stop the tiny smile from appearing in the corner of your lips, his expression reassured you that you were anything but invisible in his eyes.

As you were leading a shooting session for your team, Billy interrupted your practice, clearing his throat whilst leaning against the doorframe, watching your people. You looked at your watch, afraid of being late, but according to your time, you weren’t even anywhere near the time you were supposed to be in his office.

“Keep practising,” you instructed them as you walked back to Billy, whose arms were folded in front of his chest, his eyes following every step you took towards him. “Is everything okay?” you asked as you stopped in front of him.

“Hmm,” he replied with a simple hum and a single nod. He seemed to have something on his mind, and you were sure he would soon voice his opinion. Biting his lip, he grimaced slightly. “Your team needs more practice,” he added nonchalantly. Your eyes widened and you quickly turned around to check on the targets. Indeed, there were some errors, but you were overall satisfied with their performance, they were former members of the US Armed Forces after all. Inhaling sharply, you turned back to him, staring at his expressionless face.

“Is this really why you came here?” You asked with a questioningly raised brow.

“I was just wondering how useful you are to the company since you have been walking around voicing your importance. Just like you did in the morning, if I recall correctly,” he shrugged casually.

“Let me see if I understand. After all I have done for the company and for you, now you are checking on my people and my progress, questioning how much we are worth to your goddamn company?” You hissed in anger. Billy seemed to be on a roll attempting to piss you off at any given time. Usually, you could keep your act together, but he has done nothing but insulted you that day and he was very close to reaching your limits. You stared into his eyes and in the lowest, most threatening tone you could manage, you continued. “Listen to me Russo, I can take a lot, I’m quite a resilient person, but I’m very close to walking out of here and never coming back. If you would like me to leave then say it, but if not and you would like me to keep working for you, then let me do my job and leave me alone for the rest of the day,” you exhaled sharply and after a deadly gaze directed at your boss, you turned away and joined your team. Your blood was boiling from the amount of anger he could bring out in you, as if he found your frustration entertaining. Although you expected him to come after you and give you a monologue about humbling yourself, by the time you looked back towards the entrance, he was long gone.

It was already 5pm and Simon was nowhere to be found. You instructed the new recruits to take a 5-minute break from the exercises you have given them as you rocked from one leg to the other trying to calm yourself, slowly exhaling and inhaling. Preparing for the scolding you were about to receive from Billy, your blood pressure had risen. You groaned as you saw Simon run through the door, heavily apologising for his lateness. Shaking your head, you walked up to him and instructed him about the details of the recruits’ further training. By the time you were supposed to be in Billy’s office, you were jogging across the narrow corridors of Anvil, trying to minimise the nagging Billy was about to give you for not arriving in time.

“You are late,” you heard his voice as you opened the door, grimacing at the harsh tone. Billy didn’t even look up from his desk, his eyes were attached to the paperwork he was signing off.

“Not my fault,” you added, walking up to the table and sitting down across Billy.

“I told you to be precise,” he groaned, unhappy about your lateness.

“Next time send someone who actually appears in time,” you retorted, feeling fed up with his continued scolding.

“Once again you have that attitude,” he cleared his throat in frustration.

“Russo!” You shot up from your chair, placing your hands on his paperwork, staring straight into his eyes. “I’m aware that I have a slight problem with my attitude, but I don’t think it’s fair that you blame me for something I had no say in. You have asked Simon to replace me, still at 5pm sharp I was still in the training hub alone with the recruits, because he was late,” you replied firmly.

“I don’t think I have asked for an excuse, so why do I have to listen?” He asked with a deep frown, slowly standing up from his chair, his stance projecting authority. But at that moment, you couldn’t care less. Your blood was rushing through your veins, your built-up frustration threatening to reveal itself. As if Billy’s mere purpose was to dance on your nerves. And he was successful.

“Billy,” you called his first name with clenched teeth. You have gotten used to calling him Mr. Russo or Russo, even though you were close to each other. However recently he has been deliberately annoying you and you couldn’t take it anymore. Indeed, you wanted to get some kind of reaction out of him with your brattiness, but receiving the same attitude didn’t seem that entertaining. You knew you were supposed to be professional when you were working, even though he made it his mission to piss you off, but you just lost your self-control. “I have done nothing for this company but work my ass off to help you. When you asked, I had to be at two even three places at the same time. I have no life, because every single free time and day off I’m supposed to be having, I have to spend here to help you. I don’t mind, because I love working here and I want to make this company a better place. But you are the one talking about my attitude, even though I have never asked for anything in return?! Have I ever asked for a raise even if you dumped hours of work on me? You keep me here from early morning to late evening and I’ve never once complained, still you dare to talk about my attitude? Please, tell me what your problem is with me, because recently I feel like it’s your mission to get on my nerves. At this point the only thing I can think of is that you want me to quit because that’s the kind of hostility that comes across from you,” you huffed releasing all your frustration on your boss.

“You—” he wanted to speak up, but you didn’t let him. It was your time to talk, and you didn’t even give him a chance to object.

“No, I’m speaking,” you interrupted him, earning a sharp inhale from the man. “I understand that I’m only a mere subordinate, and I know I should not have the attitude that I do take on sometimes, but I am still a human and I don’t have to deal with your moodiness on a daily basis,” you hissed. “Tell me honestly, is it your mission to get me to quit? Because at this point you are very close to forcing me to resign and—” you had no way to finish the sentence as Billy grabbed the back of your neck and pulled your lips against his, earning a moan from you. He only let go of you for a second to get around the table, his movements quick as though he was a lion hunting down his prey. He attached his lips to yours once again, pushing you up on the table and positioning himself between your thighs. He sneaked his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him, his other hand firmly holding you close to him by the back of your neck, wanting nothing but to reduce the proximity between the two of you.

“Do you ever shut up?” He asked, breathing heavily against your lips. “I hear nothing but your continuous yapper,” he groaned as he laid his forehead against yours, massaging random patterns on your thigh. “Why on earth do you think I have given you so much job to do, you dumb woman? Can you be any more oblivious? I didn’t just dump all those random tasks on you and left you to do them, did I? I stayed behind with you, isn’t that, right?” he asked through gritted teeth. “You really know how to get on my nerves, and this certainly isn’t how I imagined this to come out, but you make it impossible for me to keep my cool,” he inhaled slowly, forcefully pulling you closer to him as he stood between your legs, making you moan at the contact. “I’m going to give you two options now,” he stated as he took a step back, giving you space to think. You can walk out that door, act like nothing happened and we will go back to being a boss and an employee. Or you can stay, and we continue what we started. But then there’s no turning back. I don’t just let go of what’s mine,” for a moment you ran the options through a logical part of your mind, that screamed for you to walk out the door. But you couldn’t possibly listen to the voice when you could finally be Billy’s after you have done so much for the man you longed for.

You grabbed his belt and pulled him between your legs, whispering against his lips. “Close that door,” Billy’s jaw clenched and without a second to waste he stood by the door, locking it behind him and getting back to you in haste, capturing your lips with his hands exploring every part of your body.

“So, have I become irreplaceable now?” You asked with a proud, overly confident grin as his hands tried to remove your shirt impatiently. His eyes darkened at your words, his hands stopping mid-air.

“Don’t get cocky with me,” he groaned, grabbing your jaw and connecting your lips once again, trying to get you out of your clothes. Whatever Billy called you for was long forgotten for the rest of the evening, you were busier with each other’s company.

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Taglist is in a reblog from now on.

[aashi-heartfilia]

The main problem with IzuOcha

Firstly, let me start off by saying that I am in fact an IzuOcha shipper and yet I still feel like something is missing. Today I finally figured out what it is, so hear me out.

The problem here lies with the writing of the story itself. It is a shonen, so people like rivals, teachers, etc are given more importance. Consider the relation between Deku and All Might or even Deku and Bakugo, how important it is to the show.

But when we think about IzuOcha?

A cute girl that Izuku has a crush on.

Nothing more, nothing less. It is even highly unlikely that he suspects any girl like him let alone one of the prettiest girls in his class. Not to mention, most of his screentime is devoted to showing his sheer focus on his goal whereas Uraraka's screentime is shown to be fawning over Deku. It's not bad at all because she never goes out of her ways to get Deku to like her but it's also kind of unfair for most of her development to be wasted like that.

Another problem is that the story is written in such a way that she doesn't contribute to anything morally. In fact, her own morals were very messed up in the beginning. She only gave a new meaning to his name and that's that. Even Bakugo and Shouto have done more than that.

-Shouto told Izuku that words need to be backed up by actions during forest training camp.

-Deku feels blessed to just have a normal-ish conversation with Kachhan.

-It was Iida who supported him during Shie Hasaikai Operation.

And many more...

What irks me is that because Deku has to become the No.1 hero, Ochako will never be his priority. Never was, never will be and even she is kinda aware of that which is why she decides to put her feelings away in the Provisional License exam but since then they have grown even stronger, which is quite apparent now.

- Despite the fact that they know each other very well, to the point where Deku was able to tell the difference between Toga and Ochako in the Pro Hero Exam but he has never been vulnerable to her and vice versa. Even during the sports festival, she decided to show Deku her mask, that she's okay and we later see her falling apart on a phone call with her dad.

Deku also shares his problems only with people like Bakugo and All Might etc. It's not like he makes her look special in any way.

So they're never vulnerable to each other and they don't connect on a deeper level like some of the other pairs in BnHA. Kirishima gets inspired by Mina in high school and decides to work hard to become a hero and later on, Mina takes the inspiration of her Acid Man from Kirishima's unbreakable. Shouto was the one to boost Momo's confidence during their Midterms test.

It goes both ways.

We see Ochako getting inspired by Deku as she attaches wires in her gauntlet/bracelets for better range and mobility. Heck, she even has a special pocket in her Hero Costume's belt where she keeps that Keyring Deku gave her as a Christmas present. It's cute like, really cute how she wants to cherish it and all but it's also very shallow at the same time. Do we see Deku getting ever inspired by Ochako in such a way?

The thing is, Ochako's shipping here comes between her character development. In season 3 the biggest development for Deku was him defeating Muscular, going to rescue Bakugo, learning Shoot style, and setting things with Bakugo and All Might for good. What was Ochako's character development?

This one scene:

Yes, this one and the only scene where she realizes that for Deku, his Hero work is his priority and that's why she decided that, that should be her priority as well. That's all.

So while Deku makes so much progress as a hero and as a person, Ochako is just stuck with "Oh what do I do with my crush?"

In season 4 there aren't any meaningful IzuOcha scenes. Even the scenes that could have been given to Ochako were given to Iida and Shouto.

They never have arguments!

I don't recall if they ever had even a single argument throughout the show.

Coincidentally, Ochako's crush is portrayed as a wrong thing by people like Toga.

And the cute All Might Netsuke later becomes a liability in the battle for her.

What's worse is that her quirk Zero Gravity is probably one of the most versatile quirks in the series that can be used for attacking, defense, rescue, chase, and whatnot but because of the lack of screentime, it is never explored in detail. While grappling hooks were a very nice addition to her costume, shouldn't she have come up with that idea way sooner so that it wouldn't look a rip off of Deku's Black whip?

There is just so much can do with her power and creating new moves would have been a no-brainer but NO! In fact, in anime and manga, this is taken as a very positive thing as we see them doing a fist bump probably in the next episode.

Ochako with her crush is like a lovestruck puppy in the limbo phase. She acknowledges her feelings but decides to push them down. The story also leaves no chance to remind the audience about her crush but we haven't even gotten a confirmation from Deku yet, so she's stuck. And even if consider the future Manga, it's all the same!

Tl;dr The ship is nice and all but Ochako's crush overshadows her Heroism and they both have other relations that are way more meaningful, interesting, and important to the series. This is why many people find this ship very bland or vanilla.

[malereader-inserts]

Not Impossible

Fandom: Harry Potter Pairing: Marauders & Male!Reader Summary: It’s all theoretical, really Word Count:  1,822 A/n: Just like End-Game we can ignore the flaws of time travelling here

“Professor?”

You looked at your head of house, she sat in her office, looking up at you confused to why you would venture out for her at the hour, very early in the morning before breakfast as even started. You looked sheepish, your tie done loosely and your shirt untucked for its pants. 

“What can I help you with?”

“I have a question, one that I usually asked Professor Dumbledore, but seeing he’s not here I would go to the next best professor,” McGonagall smiles at your compliment, “If you were to go into the future with a time turner, unlikely but not impossible when you return to your time - will you have the knowledge of the future sticking in your memory? I know that you cannot be seen by your future or past self, but other people?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Curiosity, ma’am,” You replied with a shrug, standing at her doorway, “After all, I did get hat stall with Ravenclaw, curiosity is just natural with me.”

“Well,” McGonagall hums, thinking before looking at you with sharp eyes, “I would assume so - explain further by what you mean.”

“Say I travel to the future, I have married with kids, and my kids see me - I know their names and who I marry, but not asking how it came about, technically I am not ruining the future because I’m not stopping what will come to be, right? Therefore, I should remember my time in the future and is the reason I named my kids because I met them.”

“Interesting,” McGonagall nods, “I would assume, by your logic, you would be correct - though I do wonder how you came to this conclusion.”

“I asked dad once why he called me (Y/n),” You say, there was a thoughtful look on your face, “He said I’ll understand in due time - it’s always has stuck with me so I was just thinking-”

“If your father travelled in the future and met you...”

“It’s unlikely, but not impossible.”

McGonagall had a twinkle in her eye, as if she knew something, a few years ago a group of boys come barreling into her office late in the night. You looked at her uneasy before she comes to approach you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. 

“You are correct, try not to think too much for it. You have exams to concern yourself with and a quidditch match tomorrow to think about.”

“First game against the slimy-”

“Umh!”

“Sorry,” You looked at her sheepishly, “With the Slytherin team.”

“Well, off you go, I don’t want us to miss breakfast and look smart - your father looked better in that uniform than you do!”

You smiled cheekily before dashing away from the office, McGonagall locking her office for a time being, there was a glint in her eyes as she noticed the date. Reminding herself to tell your teachers of the day that you’ll be missing on their lessons for special reasons. You walked down to the great hall, you had quidditch practise that night. Your robe draped over your shoulder bag as you tried to look presentable.

That was until you heard voices murmuring, as you went closer to an empty classroom you could hear harsh whispers. Out of curiosity, you opened the door to see four boys looking like they were just caught. Your eyes widen as they had Gryffindor ties - you know all the boys in your house, after all, prefect went to you rather to Ron - who was very relieved

“Who are you and why are you posing as Gryffindor boys?” You asked as they looked at you with wide eyes.

“We’re um-” The long hair boy spluttered, looking at glasses for support. 

As you gave them a harder look, you realised something, you had recognised them, old pictures in your dad’s photo album.

“I know you!” You exclaimed.

“Oi Lupin!” Your head snapped outside to see Seamus waving you down, “You’re going to miss breakfast!” 

“Fuck off Finnegan, no I won’t,” You say as the Irish boy chortles before dragging his friends away from you. 

You sighed as you entered the room and closing the door behind you, looking at the boys in front of you.

“You’re James Potter,” he waves, as you turn to the long-haired teen, “And you, Sirius Black!”

“Yeah, I am.”

“You’re Remus,” You smile fondly, how can you possibly miss your dad’s awkward smile? Before turning to look bitter, “And Peter Pettigrew.”

“How do you know us?” James asked.

“What year is this?” Peter asked meekly.

“Hang on,” Remus exclaimed loudly, “We’re ignoring that they said you’re a Lupin, but I don’t-”

“The year is 1996, late April, and I know you because how can I not? You’re famous whether you like it or not,” You replied, shrugging your shoulders, “By any chance have you fiddled with a time turner?”

There was silence as you crossed your arm, sharply looking at them before James broke under your stare - it was all too familiar. 

“No?”

“James,” You say lowly before he looks at Remus who reveals that he had the time turner around his neck, “You’re all idiots, the lot of you!”

“Well, we’re aware of that,” Sirius says boldly, as you glared at him.

“Well, I don’t know how long you’ll be staying here. But, you better fix it. Because what you’ve created is a paradox. This shouldn’t have happened.”

“Ah, unlikely but not impossible,” Remus pointed out.

You opened your mouth before closing them, this is what your dad means when you’ll soon find out about your name. You finally picked up on McGonagall look towards you, you sighed, running your hand down your face.

“Well, breakfast will be ending in half an hour, you stay put and I mean it - I’ll help you sort this out and you go back to whatever year you are in. How old are you even?”

“Sixteen, the lot of us, Wormtail here just turned sixteen two weeks ago.”

“Oh cool,” You answered, nodding, “Guessing in nicknames that you’ve recently able to shift into your animagus forms?”

“Yeah, how do you know that?” Peter asked as you had to hold back a glare for the lad, he’s just an innocent sixteen year old who has the whole world coming for him.

“I know you guys better than the world does,” You shrugged your shoulders.

“You haven’t answered Lupin’s question,” Sirius says.

You smirked, “You’ll find out in due time. Now, will you guys promise to stay put if I get food for you?”

They all looked to each other and nodded, you sighed in relief as you placed your bag down, before leaving the room. The group of boys looking loss before obeying and getting themselves comfortable, you had returned with goodies. 

“I’m starving!” Sirius says, ready to pounce before Remus grabbed the back of his collar, “Aw, Moony!”

“Sorry about them,” Remus says as he helps you out to distribute food, “Thank you.”

You waved them off as the five of you get to work in how to get them back to their year, not much with you telling about the future for them, but dropping sublet hints for them.

“I miss Evans,” James sighs wistfully, the three other boys ignoring him - used to his pining as you stare at him, “What?”

“Oh nothing,” You hummed before looking back at your books - which you had to make a trip to the library to bring the boys some books to look for information, “Have you ever tried referring her with her first name?”

“Trust us, Evans is scary when you call her by Lily,” Sirius responded, “I tell you, bloody scary gingers - the lot of them.”

“Tell me about it,” You say thinking about Ginny Weasley, what a fiery girl, “Well, don’t give up James, might work out.”

“You think?”

“I think.”

“James, you’re asking someone from the future - it would make sense, he would know,” Remus replied dryly.

“Do I have a kid?!” James asked excitedly.

“I’m not telling?” You give him a look, “I’m not an idiot in telling you that, Merlin’s beard, knowing you idiots you would ruin the bloody future. My future - if anything, the only one I trust is Remus!”

“Yeah, make sense,” Peter answered, even you chuckled in his response.

“Well, I’m not surprised - you do share a last name.”

You give them a glare before they all got to work. You sighed back, by midday you were hoping to find a resolution. 

“God, I’m going to be tired for practice,” You yawned as you shut the sixth book of the day, standing up to stretch, “Angelina is going to be pissed.”

“You play quidditch?”

“Yeah? Chaser,” You say, before waving it off, “Not important really.”

“I think it is, Remus doesn’t like playing quidditch but knowing that you a Lupin does - it’s fascinating!” James teases as you rolled your eyes.

Your quidditch practise started at seven, luckily it was about five that you were able to finish up with the group of idiots. You had neatly stacked some books to bring back to the library. You had a nice day, you learnt more stuff about them, stuff that you wouldn’t have known, you got them to talk about their time at school.

“We’re making a map, of the whole school, but we’re not really sure what to name it. We don’t have a group name for us, by now we were hoping someone in school would name our group for us,” Sirius mention before James nudges him, telling him that he shouldn’t have told you.

You a bit preoccupied, answered without a thought, “Oh, marauders fits you idiots quite well.”

“Marauders?” Peter asked inquisitively. 

“One who roams from one place to another, it fits well with a map if you ask me,” You hummed before looking at them, all of them huddled with a chain around their necks. Remus holding the time turner, he looks at you.

“Wait, we never got your name or who you are,” He says, you smile at him.

“Oh, I’m (Y/n) Lupin, I’m your son,” With that, you started the turns of their time tuner, as Remus looks at you wide-eye, “Told you, you’d understand in due time.”

With that, you step back watching the boys fade away. You sighed and continue with your dad as you left the classroom to make your way to the library then to the great hall, you just can’t help be send a strongly worded letter to your father - hoping he reads it to Sirius. 

“Bunch of wankers,” You muttered to yourself.

“Are you okay, Mr Lupin?” McGonagall asked as you looked at her, “Muttering yourself again? How was your day?”

“It was eventful, more than I thought it would be.”

“Well, I shouldn’t keep you too long, hope you had a lovely day.”

You nodded, “Yeah, what an unlikely day I’ve had.”

[howggswouldreact]

🏥 The Personification of Our Love | Kim Lip

Request: kim lip x reader where the reader is pregnant and goes into labor pls ~~~ love your blog ♡♡♡♡ Plot: Jungeun is waiting at the Hospital while Reader is in labor. Jungeun's mind flies to loving memories. Words: 2, 222 Genre: fluff, pregnancy Notes: i use to say "i loved writing this one" because i really do love writing things you all request me. and i loved writing this one. i love to write about things that involve family and friendship, etc. this one is the type to make my heart feel at peace... i hope you enjoy it and have a nice read! ♡♡

Maybe Jungeun shouldn't keep her eyes open for so long, without blinking. At least that's what Haseul was telling her all the time, but she wouldn't be aware of what her friend was saying until hours later, when the white doors were opened and a person wearing blue from head to toe told her that she was finally allowed to enter. For now, she had her hands cupped over her mouth, her feet tapping the floor in a frantic rhythm, her heart pumping blood like crazy.

Why couldn't things be like in the movies, where she could just have a camera filming everything that was going on in that room?

How was it going? How were you? And how was the baby? GOD, WAS THE BABY OKAY?

The movements of her feet accelerated even more and she felt the touch of a hand resting very cautiously on her knee.

"Stop doing that, you're looking like a maniac!", Hyejoo's voice, impatient and at the same time anxious, sounded beside Jungeun.

"I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.", she replied in a low voice, sweat forming on the corner of her forehead.

A huge, vibrant smile appeared in the blonde's vision and warm hands took hers, that were cold, in an affectionate squeeze. Jiwoo.

"How about if we go get something to eat? I'm sure there must be anything good in these machines full of food.”, said her longtime friend.

With a nod and letting Jiwoo guide her, Jungeun was pulled by the arm to a vending machine in the corner of the waiting room. While, in her mind, Jungeun was pulled for a few moments before what would be the greatest moment of her life (along with her wedding day, of course).

8 AM, same day

"Christ! It’s like I'm about to explode!", you said, putting your hand on your belly and feeling a twinge in your back.

"A beautiful, healthy child is going to appear from this explosion...", Jungeun started to speak, slowly approaching the bed, leaning on one knee and then the other. "And this child is very...", her hands landed on your belly, one of them over your right hand. "... very loved!"

"And we haven't even thought about the name of this beloved child yet."

You looked at her with a disapproving gaze.

"I don't want to decide anything right now because I think it will be more exciting to take this important decision when the time comes.", Jungeun shrugged without looking at you, she was very busy stroking your belly button.

"Maybe if you just let me..."

"Don't even think about it. This baby is mine too, you know?", the irritated tone disappeared from Jungeun's voice when her eyes met the playful glow of yours. She smiled.

"You know I would never make a decision like that without you, right?"

She nodded and lifted her body so she could kiss you, but there was a huge belly between the two of you - with a baby on the way in - and you started to laugh.

"Ahhhh!! So close yet so far!", dramatized Jungeun, as she lay down beside you and kissed your forehead and then your lips. "Now, close enough."

10 PM, the day before

"I still can't believe you chose this crackhead to be our baby's godmother...", you whispered to Jungeun, leaning on the doorframe while watching Jiwoo dancing some children's music and doing a super choreography in front of a camera.

Jungeun smiled at you.

"It's not like you didn't say 'oh, babe, I would never forgive you if I didn't choose Jiwoo to be our baby’s godmother', right?"

All the girls were there, they decided to have the first “Girls’ Pajama Party with the Baby” even before the baby was born. Not that you didn't love the idea, but to see Jiwoo carrying that camera everywhere was hilarious. You wouldn't miss an opportunity to make fun of it.

"You have to understand that I have hormones. Many! And they are crazy running back and forth, telling me what to do all the time! It's not like everything I say is valid while pregnant. Plus: I didn’t know she would do this Good Luck Charlie sort of thing."

With a mischievous look, Jungeun brought her face close to yours, smiling like a mischievous child.

"So it means that I am right deciding that the baby's one-year birthday should be Taeyeon-themed."

You gave her an angry look.

"I've been carrying our beautiful baby for nine months. If it were to honor someone on their one-year anniversary, it should be me."

A warm laugh from the bottom of Jungeun's heart filled your ears. She came over and wrapped her right arm around your waist while her left hand was over your protruding belly. None of you had reached such a full level of happiness like this before.

"Don't worry... Taeyeon won't be a party theme, I promise." she kissed your face. "It's so easy to annoy you lately. But there's no need to worry. The one-year anniversary theme will be Harry Potter, anyways."

You rolled your eyes trying to hide a smile. Jungeun noticed it. She always did. She smiled back and stroked your belly once more. It was difficult to know which of you two was most anxious for the family to be finally complete.

5 months ago

"Come on, say something very beautiful and with enough meaning, because then I will edit with a ballad song in the background."

Jiwoo was pointing the camera at you, whose lips were covered with doritos crumbs and ice cream, while Jungeun held up a jar of that same ice cream that you dipped the spoon from time to time.

"I can only think of how bizarre these mixtures become each month, I have no idea what beautiful things I can say.", Jungeun spoke while giving you a judgmental look. “I can’t believe my baby is eating… this.”

"Just say my name, so you will say one of the most beautiful things in the world.", you replied, raising your eyebrows as you dipped the tip of the doritos in the pistachio green and put it whole in your mouth.

"Grooooooss.", Jiwoo hummed as she turned the camera to her face. "I hope you don't have to deal with this often."

You two were at Heejin's apartment, decided to stop by as you were walking around the neighborhood looking for that ice cream flavor. Yeojin and Jiwoo went to meet you. This was yet another visit for the future "aunts" of the baby to come.

"I will definitely deal with them to keep you safe." Yeojin noted, beside Jiwoo and staring at the camera.

"Don't worry. We will protect you from anything that might negatively affect you, even if it means taking you away from these delinquents' arms." Heejin said, joining the other two.

"An army against us?", Jungeun asked as you put one of those doritos in her mouth.

They giggled. Another scene for the baby's life documentary, directed exclusively by Kim Jiwoo.

7 months ago

"Well... maybe we should... maybe we should buy baby things? Or set up the baby's room?", You suggested, astonished by the news that, finally, you were going to have a baby.

With the results of the exam in hands, Jungeun was very quiet on the way home. Parking the car in the garage of the building where you lived together, you waited for an answer to your questions.

Pregnant? Who knew you would be pregnant? Well, it was your dream two months ago. You both decided to make this dream come true. But it was a short while ago, actually. And you were not expecting a positive response so quickly. On the first try? Wow! This was really fast.

You noticed Jungeun's trembling hands and, now that you were pregnant, you would have a child of both of you, increasing the "family with our shape" because it's gonna be "the personification of your love", as the blonde said a few times. You wondered if she regretted it. After all, it would affect both your lives on a large scale, even though it was, at the moment, no more than the size of a bean.

"Look, I... I understand if you don't want to say anything. I will respect your space, but I thought it was our decision and..."

"Could you excuse me for a moment?", Jungeun said, in a whispering voice, and getting out of the car.

You understood that you shouldn't go after her and you were left with no reaction to her words. Meanwhile, outside the car, in the light of the vehicle's white headlights, the blonde of exuberant beauty and small body read the exam again, a growing smile on the pink lips that you loved to kiss so much.

Suddenly, to your shock, she let out a cry mixed with laughter and jumped in the air. It was as if, there, in that deserted garage and with you in the car, there was a space where Jungeun could celebrate it with vivacity. She was just so full of joy!

She was just as happy as you are, obviously! She just needed to find a place to outsource it, a moment when she could be free, a place where she could celebrate it!

Jungeun's hands held the test results as if they were holding the most precious thing in her life. And, somehow, it was.

You flashed the headlights in sync with her leaps and, watching her body turn to the car, her dark brown eyes staring into the glass, you knew what she would say and you both said at the same time, in a whisper only your hearts could hear.

"I love you."

Back to Present – 3 AM

Keeping a packet of m&m's in her jacket pocket, saving it for you to eat later, Jungeun finished eating a strawberry cereal bar, chewing slowly as the girls entered into a conversation to try to calm their spirits. In fact, everyone there was looking forward to you and the baby being well and being able to receive visitors as soon as possible.

Jinsoul told a story of her adolescence and the girls highlighted some parts, asked a few things and laughed. But Jungeun's mind was just a few feet from that waiting room.

Were you in pain? Was the baby finding the way out safely? Was the baby healthy? Were you okay?

She had no way of knowing. She went to the bathroom, the girls followed the blonde head with concern as she crossed the room to the door with a blue sign written "toilet".

When closing the door already inside the bathroom, every sound coming from outside was isolated. Jungeun turned the tap on and felt the cascade of water flowing through her fingers, finding some calm with that, since the only person who could give her the biggest amount of peace was in labor.

She washed her face and dried it with paper, stared at her reflection and realized she was pale. She would only regain color when she could finally see you and the baby.

She put her hand on the door handle again, turning it, and when she closed the door behind her, she noticed that all the girls were standing, staring at the beginning of the corridor. Her face turned in the same direction, where a nurse was standing still, noticed the movement of the woman's lips and the signal for her to follow her on a path. That woman would take Jungeun's to where her heart belonged.

"I wish you were with me... with us at the moment…", you whispered.

"The nurses didn't let me in, babe, but I'm here now..."

Jungeun was almost crouched beside the bed, her face close to yours. She reached up and stroked your cheekbones, touching your forehead with hers.

“How was it?”, she asked.

“It was like I was shitting a coconut.”

Her throat exploded with a pleasurable laugh, making you laugh along, even though you felt a lot of pain in your entire body. Tiredness was overwhelming you, but not enough to see your baby again.

"I only saw our baby for about 5 seconds and I was barely able to see that little face before they did the cleaning and exams."

Your voice was a whisper and Jungeun shook her head, as if she told you not to worry about it, and then she gave you a peck.

When the nurse came into the room and placed the baby in your arms, Jungeun was already crying. She never thought that your love could take on a human shape, so small, fragile and beautiful.

"Oh, God... I love you both so much..." she said, letting those strong tears run down her clean face as she bent down to kiss the top of the baby's head very gently.

That little body, with small hands, gripped her finger firmly and you knew that you would not let anything in the world do anything to destroy that purity. Jungeun felt the same way. Somehow, you knew that. You felt that. Perhaps because you had known her for a long time. Perhaps it was because of love. But you did knew. And she also knew that, whatever happened, her family would always be the homewhere your hearts could rest.

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

A chatty writing update | novels, short fiction, etc!

Hi folks!

It’s been a while since I last wrote an update on this blog! I thought it’d be fun to go back to basics, and just talk about writing. This post chats about: new plans for Feeding Habits, my newest novel, my short story goals & growing collection, along with process reflections.

(image description: a photo of green leaves with the text “writing update” in a white font written on top. /end image description)

Post starts under the cut!

General taglist (please ask to be added or removed)

@if-one-of-us-falls, @qatarcookie, @chloeswords, @alicewestwater, @laughtracksonata, @shylawrites, @ev–writes, @jaydewritesfiction, @jennawritesstories @eowynandfaramir, @august-iswriting, @aetherwrites, @avakrahn, @maisulli

What have I been up to?

For starters, I finished my second year of my Writing undergrad last week and got two of my final grades back today (A+ baby)! For anyone who has taken online university, y’all already KNOW, but this year was so difficult. Would not recommend! Really proud of myself to have gotten through this absolute rollercoaster of a school term and am excited to get into some writing. That leads us to:

What have I been up to (writing edition)?

2021 started off so fast. By the time January hit, I was so consumed in my new semester that I did not have time to write Feeding Habits (my novel). In the first few days of the term, I managed to write between class, until I could no longer keep up! Essentially, I did not write any of that novel until exam season (last week), where I did manage to get in about 3k words in ~4 days.

Feeding Habits

I’m currently drafting what I believe will be the last chapter of this book (chapter 10: Swan Song). This chapter is so bizarre for a few reasons. It begins the book’s third part and also marks the shift back into Lonan’s head from Harrison’s. I originally thought this part would be much, much longer, with at least another five chapters to go, but quickly realized the book’s content was nearly completed. In my 4 day 3k palooza, I hit 50k in the book (the word count goal), and couldn’t see myself extending past 60k. Since then, I’ve made the loose decision to write this final chapter as a ~novella. Here are a few reasons why:

1. This chapter is structurally very strange.

I unashamedly shift from present to past to present to past past, and so much more every 12 words. I mapped out the timeline on a sheet of paper, and there were over 20 shifts in scenes (the chapter is only about 4400 words at the moment). The fictive past is incredibly important to this chapter, more important than the present, and I thought it would make more sense to not break randomly for a chapter so I could upkeep the consistent inconsistency of the chapter.

2. The chapter is very abstract

This stems from the structural changes, but there are paragraphs in this chapter of the fictive present that are loosely based in reality. They’re more poems than they are factual paragraphs, and keeping them all contained in one place (so a mega chapter/ novella) would reduce the most confusion!

3. There’s not much left to cover

Like I said above, Feeding Habits is on its last leg, lol! I know exactly where the book needs to end up, which is very, very soon from where I’m currently at on the timeline. Swan Song should cover what 2-4 chapters would cover in terms of arcs.

Feeding Habits and I have a really weird relationship, tbh! When I realized a few weeks ago that it’d been over a year since I started the book, I realized I just needed to finish it. Not that I want to rush (because I’ve taken longer than a year to write a book in the past), but that in order to move onto another project, I’d like to put this one behind first. This book has been the hardest thing I’ve ever written, and has reminded me there’s always a time to let go. This sort of scrounges up a conversation about letting this entire series go, which is certainly something I’ve been contemplating doing soon(ish). If this spinoff series gets a third book, that may or may not be the last Fostered book for a very long time (or ever)! There are many complex reasons to move on, but the main one is that I have other projects I’d like to focus on. This is not a definitive decision, but something I’ve certainly been thinking about!

Here are a few excerpts I wrote recently:

(TW: death, gore)

Dying feels like being a trout dangled out of water. Clinging to a hook. Mouth open. Scales iridescent in a final death cry. It’s like blood spurting up the knuckles, drowning out the flesh. It’s that moment on the long fall down when the clouds cup the body. Easy drifting. The sound a skull makes when it cracks is really just the afterthought.

(TW: death, gore)

Kill shot. Death blow. Coup de grace. Right in the heart. He feels it. The blood swelling, slicking his palms. He can do it. Reach into the cavity. Feel for the ribs. Part each bone. Then cup the humming heart. Stay there. Right. It’s never been easier.

Look at this PURE moment of Lonan holding a baby I CANNOT:

The grocery store was a fifteen-minute walk away. With Olivia clinging to his shoulder, Lonan was acutely aware that she could feel his heartbeat. Open valve. Close. Repeat. Hers pulsed right above his, a miniature drumming. The sky had bruised purple, misted with clouds. The evening air nipped his cheeks, so he made sure Olivia was securely fastened between him and his jacket. With wide eyes, she absorbed the drowsy suburbia, all its family cars pulling into driveways, all its couples heading back home after a sunset walk. When Lonan passed a young boy walking two golden retrievers, Olivia giggled, and didn’t stop, even after he’d spent fifty dollars on groceries and nearly the rest on a red Corolla marked with a MUST GO NOW sign outside a convenience store.

Let’s move on!

Mandy and Cora

I said I wouldn’t talk too much about this project, but I just love it so much?? I wanted to share my SUPER early thoughts on drafting a novel, especially one that is SO different from what I’ve been writing recently. I talked about this before in THIS post, but the summary about this project is that it’s a YA contemporary novel! Can’t believe I’m writing YA again, it’s been so long, but I also think it’s going so well. Everything I’ve learned as a literary fiction writer has been a fantastic primer for transferring back to the genre. Admittedly, I have not written much, but I’m having a lot of fun diving back into a lighter project. This is the summary:

Cora and Mandy are identical twins who’ve always done everything together. But when Mandy decides to go to university out of province after graduation and Cora doesn’t, Cora takes this as an opportunity to “test run” life apart from her sister for the first time by spending the summer at her aunt’s house across the country.

I have come up with a few ~things since I last talked about this project, mostly how I’d like to structure it. As of now, I’d like the book to be structured super loosely. I’m really pulling on a lot of inspo from “We Are Okay” by Nina LaCour (which is SO good), particularly how “nothing happens-y” that book is. This project (which I still need a title for!!) will be structured in short chapters that cover something Cora does on her own for the first time (without Mandy). For example, a few ideas are “Flight”, “Lunch”, and “Groceries”. “Flight” is the first “chapter” (they’re really kind of vignettes) where Cora flies to her aunt’s house. I still can’t determine if this book will take place in Canada. On one hand, I feel like there will be a wider audience if it takes place in the US (is that just an assumption??? maybe?? someone let me know!), but also: don’t really care too much about an audience at the moment! It could also take place in Canada (So Ontario and British Columbia). But if it does take place in the US, I think it may take place in NYC and San Francisco. The problem is: I really don’t like researching lol, and while I’ve been to NYC many times, I will definitely write it wrong! Does this really matter on a first draft?? absolutely not lol, but of course I am already overthinking!

But back to structure: I am looking forward to seeing what this looser structure will do. This is a story that is solely around one half of a set of twins learning to be her own person (and ultimately that she doesn’t have to completely forget her sister in order to do that), and as a twin who KNOWS this feeling, I think this structure of her doing things for the first time is SUPER relatable.

I was worried it might sound silly/worrying to others who are not twins that Cora hadn’t done things like “lunch” or “groceries” on her own, but I feel this so much as an identical twin myself! Not that she hasn’t done anything at all by herself, but as a twin, when you do something without your twin for the first few times, at least in my experience, you notice. If any twins are reading this--weigh in!

This story is the most personal thing I’ve ever written. It definitely is an OwnVoices book! Usually, I avoid details that are remotely similar to me because they make me uncomfortable haha, but with this book, it’s all me, lol! The characters are all Guyanese, which is SO fun because I’ve been planning what they eat (my fellow Caribbean peeps know: the FOOD!), which is so fun (yes they have pumpkin and shrimp, yes they have roti, yes they have pera, yes they have mithai). Every time I’ve gone to dabble at this book, or even think about it, I get incredibly emotional for this reason? I don’t exactly know why. I think this is a story I just so want to tell, with the culture I love SO much that I definitely struggled to love as a child. This is reclamation bitchessss!

Not going to lie tho: the prospect of writing ~a book~ is kind of freaky! I’m going to make the minimum word count for this book pretty short (50k) and see where it goes from there. I think I will focus on this project this summer! Originally I was going to write a literary novel this summer, but I think this one’s calling my name!

Here’s a pretty rough excerpt:

Try. I remind myself that’s what I’m doing after the flight attendant fills me a disposable cup of Coca Cola and all I can think of is Mandy and I shoving Mentos into a bottle of the stuff when we were twelve. Just me, wedged in the middle seat between an exchange student heading out for summer break and a middle-aged woman sipping a cocktail, thinking of Mandy and I bursting whole oranges in a blender when we were bored one Winter break as the plane dips through a wave of turbulence. Mandy and I dying our hair neon green with highlighters (didn’t work—our hair is too dark) as the plane lands on the tarmac. Mandy and I arguing so loud last month, we both lost our voices as I lug my carry-on out of the overhead compartment and shuffle off the plane and through the airport, searching for Aunt Vel.

Short Fiction

I’ve written so much short fiction this year! I have a goal to write a short story a month (they can range in length, as long as 1 is “complete”), so my short story brain has seriously been soaking it all up lately. Let’s chat my month to month breakdown so far:

January:

I wrote four stories in January! The first is a flash fiction piece called “Shark Swimming” that follows a young woman who attends a shark swimming class after breaking up with her girlfriend. I wrote this story for a “test” workshop for my fiction class, and it was based off the prompt “think about something you’re afraid to do and make the character do that thing”. I’m not particularly afraid of sharks, but had been wanting to use the title “Shark Swimming” for AGES (literally since 2018).

This story is one of my favourites. It’s only about 900 words, but I think there’s something profound in how mundanely specific it is. The entire story doesn’t even see the narrator swim with sharks once; it actually takes place fully in the sanctuary’s lobby. But I really love this narrator. This is the first story I’ve written in second person in a while, though I felt really connected to the unnamed narrator. She struggles with accepting that she truly is a “boring” person, and there’s something about the final image that really gets me!

I’ve been submitting this around, though it’s been rejected a handful of times. Hoping I can secure it at a magazine one day because I really love it!

The second story is “Joanne, I’ll Pray for You” which is actually a rewrite of one of my very first short stories (the first story I did not write for a class haha), “NYC in Your Apartment”. I LOVE this rewrite a lot, and also learned the original is not a very good short story! Revising this story taught me just how much I’ve learned in the 2 years I’ve been writing short fiction. Seeing the 2019 version versus the 2021 version side by side is fascinating because I essentially “gutted’ the 2019 version of its beginning and end until all that was left was the middle of the story (aka the actual story). AKA: this is the only story I’ve ever written with a hopeful ending and I cut out all the happy bits lol I am SO sorry (that arc is more for a novel or novella). That’s how this went from a 5k word story to an 1800 word story (my Submittable thanks me for this lol). A lot of details and scenes I included were more pertinent to a 3 act structure/novel, which of course short stories don’t often have because of their brevity. I love rambling about writing theory, and seeing that actually pay off is so fascinating!

(TW: trauma)

Like the original, this story follows Joanne, a woman in her early twenties, who spontaneously breaks up with her boyfriend. She claims the poltergeist haunting her drove her to this decision. The original draft focused a lot more on the traumatic events Joanne survives, but this draft really loosens them up. It focuses less so on the events themselves, and more on how Joanne’s life is affected. I found the details of these events were less important, and even sort of contradicted Joanne’s insistence she is being haunted. Instead, the poltergeist really takes more precedence in the new draft as a force Joanne doesn’t understand. That ambiguity, I think, is what the story truly needed.

I also centralized Joanne’s relationship with her boyfriend, Julian, here. Now don’t get me wrong, I really didn’t add anything to this draft. It was a matter of trimming the fat around it to leave the lean “meat” in the centre. But by removing that fat, I was able to emphasize what was most important here, and that was her relationship. Julian always played a really big role in the original draft, but I feel like his role as both a friend and partner to Joanne is much more emphasized since this draft literally is only two scenes now. Because there is less, there is more room for Joanne to reflect, which I’m happy about!

A final change I made was the setting and therefore the title. The original, which was “NYC in Your Apartment,” I couldn’t keep because I shifted the setting to Toronto (this is how I originally saw it, but in 2019 I just?? couldn’t?? write?? canlit??), and “Toronto in Your Apartment” sounded sort of gross LOL. The new title comes from a line in the story which I think is more relevant to the themes!

The next short story I wrote in January was “How to Spell Alpaca.” This one is super fun because I wrote it SO fast (in about 15 minutes or so). THIS is the writing update if you’re interested in learning more. I talked extensively about this one in that update, but some developments are that I dove into an edit a few weeks ago to really understand the core of the story. I’m still not quite there (this is just an intuitive feeling; I know not everything has “clicked), but I am really intrigued by the two mothers in the story, the narrator, and her newfound acquaintance, Violet. Both really struggle to understand their place as mothers (the narrator even declares she isn’t a mother anymore). The narrator, who is in her 50s, sees herself in Violet, who is much younger (~20s), and so she views Violet’s relationship with her daughter in a cautionary, yet mournful way, like she can see it will end up like her own relationship with her daughter, despite wanting the opposite. This is a really subtle story. I feel like if you blink, you’ll miss the message. But I think it’s compelling for that reason. It’s really a portrait of parenting and how to grapple with mistakes you may make that inevitably affect your children. Wow just unlocked the theme writing this lol.

The final story I wrote in January is “The Party,” which may be in my top 3 faves I’ve ever written. This story follows Aida, a recent divorcee in her ~40s. The day her divorce turns official, she moves into a new house and receives a party invitation addressed to the previous homeowner, yet RSVP’s anyway. At this party, she’s hoping to find some sense of noticeability, having struggled with being nondescript her whole life. Things seem quite normal at the party, until it gets bizarre.

I LOVE this story, y’all. Like “How to Spell Alpaca” it really delves into motherhood. Aida, our narrator, is incredibly hurt after her divorce. She now lives farther from her children she struggled to feel connected to in the first place, and doesn’t really know how to reignite her life. This party is a means to do that. This is the first story I’ve written that contains a “twist” which is strange because I really prefer stories that give us as much info as possible upfront, but yes, this one sort of twists.

February

I wrote one story in February, and that was “Protect the Young.” This title is SO changing when I think of a new one because it’s thematically incorrect, haha, but this story follows a woman in her late 40s whose daughter, Lindy, announces she is married the same day all their backyard chickens turn up dead. The discovery of dead chickens prompts our narrator to recall her ex-husband’s murder and the role her daughter may have played in his death.

I love this story so much! I think this would make a great closing for my short story collection. It just has that vibe! I wrote this for my second fiction workshop. I thought I had to hand in the story a week earlier than I had to, so I panicked and wrote this in one sitting! Little did I know, I did not need to do that lol but I’m very happy because this story is so fun. We get to learn more about Arnold (her ex), his relationship with Lindy, and how that translates to Lindy’s relationship with her new husband, Malcolm. I LOVE true crime (I listen to about 3-4 hours of case coverage daily), and this is my first “true crime” story. Because of that, I’m very sus of a few details that probably wouldn’t slide in actual investigatory work, so I’ll also be working on that in a revision. My professor also gave me a great suggestion that may alter the story’s structure a bit, though I look forward to toggling with it in the future.

March

In March, I was really on a Criminal Minds kick lol. I’ve been watching this show since I was seven (oops), and dove into a rewatch since it hit Disney+! This story, “Where to Run When the Lamb Roars,” is very clearly Rachel watching 5 episodes of CM a day. Oops! We follow 14-year-old Astrid as she and her older half brother kidnap a young girl to sacrifice for their yearly ritual.

I knew a few things going into this story, but the main thing was that I did NOT want to show any details of a potential murder (if one even occurs). I really wanted to keep all of those elements off the page because this story is not about those events, but about Astrid’s relationship with her brother. They are a murderous duo, with Astrid actually being the dominant partner. I wanted to explore that. I knew her brother, Fox, was more of a submissive partner in their team, even when he used to do this same thing with his father when he was much younger (chilling!), and so it was a task to explore how this young girl’s desire for violence works. The end actually comes right before the story starts, one could say, but I like it for this reason. It really made me contemplate the story by the time I finished it, and helped me examine what it really was about versus what it appeared to be about.

April

(TW: sexual content, non explicit)

I was so busy this month! Who knows if I’ll write a story last minute, but I did write one story this month called “Five Times Fast.” I wrote this during a “writing sprint” that was being hosted at a flash fiction workshop I recently took with one of my favourite writers ever, K-Ming Chang. I learned so much from this class, and am so happy I came out of it with a draft! This story is just over 300 words, so the shortest flash I’ve ever written, but I’m really happy with it. It was based off the prompt “describe the last time you or your character was naked.” In this case, the narrator has a “friends with benefits” relationship with Ricky who works at a laundromat. This story highlights a moment in this relationship (and also Ricky’s goofy personality lol). I really like it! Hopefully I’ll submit it to some magazines soon.

My short story collection

Very briefly I wanted to touch on my short story collection which I’ve titled “She is Also Dead.” I’ve been meaning to make a blog post on this, so look out for that in the coming months, but this collection is already at around 35k words (about 14 stories so far). The collection also surprisingly has a solid amount of flash fiction which is kind of fun! There’s definitely a range here, which is what I personally love in short story collections.

I feel very professional now that I have a ~collection chart. This is her:

(image description: A chart with the title “She is Also Dead.” It is broken into four columns: Story, Status, Word Count, and Published. Entry 1 - Story: Slaughter the Animal. Status: Revisions, Word Count, 3982, Published: N/A. Entry 2 - Story: Joanne, I’ll Pray for You, Status: Polished, Word Count: 1809, Published: N/A. Entry 3 - Story: Primary Organs, Status: Published, Word Count: 2342, Published: The Malahat Review. Entry 4 - Story: Faberge, Status, Polished, Word Count: 619, Published: N/A. Entry 5 - Story: The Wolf-Antelope Will Not Come for Us, Status, Polished, Word Count: 1556, Published: filling Station (forthcoming). Entry 6 - Story: How to Spell Alpaca, Status: revisions, Word Count: 1327, Published: N/A. Entry 7 - Story: Blink Twice for Final Judgement, Status: Polished, Word Count: 6572, Published: N/A. Entry 8 - Story: The Species is Dead, Status: Published, Word Count: 1208, Published: Minola Review. Entry 9 - Story: Shark Swimming, Status: Polished, Word Count: 907, Published: N/A. Entry 10 - Story: The Party, Status, Polished, Word Count 2339, Published: N/A. Entry 11 - Story: Fig, Status: Polished, Word Counter: 947, Published: N/A. Entry 12 - Story: Protect the Young, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 4128, Published: N/A. Entry 13 - Story: Where to Run When the Lamb Roars, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 2174, Published: N/A. Entry 14 - Story: Phantom Limbs, Status: Revisions, Word Count: 4844, Published: N/A.) /end image description.

This order is DEFINITELY not permanent (at this point whenever I write a story, I just fit it randomly into this chart lol), and some of the info is outdated (for example, Slaughter the Animal is now polished!!! thank god!!!). But just an idea of what I’m thinking of including.

This is the summary so far:

In SHE IS ALSO DEAD, characters are pushed to act on their gravest impulses. A small town turns murderous when their local invasive species, the Janices, begin dying. A child struggles to understand her mother’s suicide. A college dropout who insists she’s being haunted by a poltergeist unexpectedly breaks up with her boyfriend. A mother acknowledges her daughter’s murderous tendencies after her backyard chickens mysteriously die. A young girl caters the funeral of a girl rumored to be killed by a wolf-antelope. A newly-divorced mother RSVP’s to a bizarre party she was not invited to, and a murderous brother and sister upkeep their yearly tradition of abducting a young girl. These stories follow characters who navigate death, violent desires, womanhood, and loss, both self-imposed and otherwise.

This is also so subject to change as I may pull and add stories to the collection!

I think I’m going to leave this update here for now! I’ve written TONS of poetry too, but I honestly ~hate my poetry right now lol, so! Hope you enjoyed this chill rambly update. Hope writing has going well for you all! All the best!

--Rachel

[ichibanerd]

How to be a Healthier INTP, by an INTP

Create a system and build your day around it. And no, I’m not talking about a schedule because we know we suck at following them. For instance, I bet you forget to drink water if you are not reminded in a way or another. I make sure to drink a glass of water every three hours. “Oh, but wouldn’t that make things harder?” Not at all! I wake up at 6, drink a glass of water. Then again at 9. Then at 12 when I have lunch. And then at 3pm and so on. We’re always looking at the time. Might as well put that to good use. Also! Try to pick three things you want to do the next day before you go to bed. And then switch doing them throughout your day. If I choose to study, update my blog and work out, I might study a little, then go and work out. And then Update. Then back to studying. 

Reward yourself. Between those 3 things sneak in some fun. We’re too impatient to reward ourselves at the end of the day. Start small!

Sleep early and wake up early. Sleep is so important! The better you sleep the easier it will be for you do grasp a hold of your inferior functions. By default we are not very aware of our surroundings. Getting enough sleep will help you keep your mind sharp. If your sleep schedule is disastrous, start slowly. Let’s say you sleep at 3 am. Try going bed one hour earlier than that for a week. And then always reduce the time by an hour week by week. “But I won’t fall sleep even if I lay down.” That’s alright. Try to do things that relax you before bed. Listen to podcasts, play a game on you phone for a bit, read a book. Anything that you find relaxing. 

Use your bed only to sleep and bang. (At least try to reduce the time you lay in your bed.) Seriously, if you’re not going to bed for any of those reasons, don’t go at all.

Never go to bed if you’re hungry. It’ll just make you feel uncomfortable and you’ll have a harder time going to sleep. 

Work out!! This is so important. It’ll help you feel more present in the moment. Teaches you how to be okay with being uncomfortable, creates discipline (which we INxPs really lack)  and it’s good for your health. Also it’ll make you feel more confident with yourself. Start with working out 2 minutes a day. Jumping rope is a good idea as well! Don’t worry to much. You’ll see that soon your time will get longer. 

Try grasping information randomly about the subject you’re studying at least a few days before your exam. We grasp information easier when it’s thrown at us randomly but that in our logic makes a lot of sense. I really don’t know how to explain this that well. But let’s say that you’re learning a foreign language. It’s probably easier for you to learn words at random periods of time, rather than when the teacher makes a list of them and gives it to you expecting you to master them for the upcoming exam. You’ll learn them anyway, I’m sure, but you’ll probably forget them once the exam is over if they didn’t make a logical sense in your brain. 

If you don’t know what you want, then know what you don’t want. A lot of people take the route that will take them to their goal. But what if you don’t have one? Then do your best planning at avoiding things that you don’t want happening. I know this seems obvious, but we often fall down a rabbit hole and forget where we are, or who we are. 

Take alone time even when you’re not feeling apathetically antisocial. Make it clear to people who know you that from x to y time, you want to relax. Soon you’ll have a better grasp of your tendencies to isolate from the world. 

Learn to distinguish your feelings from those of other people. Contrary to popular belief, we’re extremely empathetic thanks to our buddy Fe. And we struggle a lot with emotional outbursts that come from others. If said emotions are too intense, we might get ill even physically. Take deep breaths down to your belly, and use you Ti to logically make sense of the situation. Is there any reason for me to feel sad/angry/hurt/whatever right now? Explain to yourself why you shouldn’t be feeling like that and get the situation back in control.

Don’t let people step on you. Honestly, if someone is taking advantage of your good nature then call them out on it. If they are not willing to talk about it and instead deny the facts, then leave. Do whatever you can to get out of that situation. 

You are more important than what other people expect from you. No matter how nice you are, people will always be unhappy. That said, always give people a chance, and if they miss it that’s on them. You can go back to taking care of yourself.

Realize that you can’t help people who are too stubborn and refuse to help themselves. Don’t beat yourselves over it. Give advice and a helping hand, but if you see that they are not taking them, leave them to take responsibility for themselves. It is absolutely not your job to take upon yourself the responsibility of other’s actions, or the lack of them. I know it sounds harsh, but the sooner you realize this, the better; not only for you, but for those who you tried to help as well.

Don’t share your opinions where you know they are not welcome. Sometimes, people will refuse to see the truth, and that’s on them. Do not try to convince them otherwise. Shrug it off and go on with your day. Often times our ideas seem a bit too ‘out there’ to other people. Especially to certain sensory types (looking at you XSFJ), but of course they are not the only ones. You might have a harder time having a deep conversation with them, but don’t let this stop you. If you see that your idea gets ignored, just sit back and watch the world burn. Have some popcorn while you’re at it.

That said! Don’t be afraid to share your ideas and opinions. Never let fear decide for you. If you’re feeling fearful and anxious just ask yourself: What am I afraid of? List your fears, and then conquer them one by one.

Never allow people to use guilt against you. Realize when people are doing this to manipulate you and break free from it. Realize that whatever happened, happened. It’s okay. Learn from it so it won’t repeat itself and then move on. You don’t need to beat yourself over it every day for the rest of your life. Forgive yourself. We’re human. Mistakes is what we learn from. 

A jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one. Learn to incorporate your inferior functions in your daily life. Look up videos and information on your type and especially pay attention to unhealthy patterns. See if any of them resonate with you. The first step to getting rid of a problem is by acknowledging it. 

Try do get out of your comfort zone sometimes, but don’t go and throw yourself off a cliff. Being out of your comfort zone might be stressful, but it shouldn’t give you a mental breakdown. If you’re feeling that it is too much for you, then retreat (mission failed, we’ll get them next time) but don’t be afraid to try again. However, if it is something that isn’t for you, don’t try to force it upon yourself. Being comfortable is just as important. Try to balance out the two. For example, I am not fond of loud places with a lot of people so going to a pub for me is too much, especially because I’m not interested in whatever is going on there. Going to the gym however is out of my comfort zone, but I enjoy working out, so I’m more willing to try it. After you break your comfort zone enough times it becomes ordinary, and you won’t such a hard time with it anymore. 

Keep a journal to sort out your ideas and things you learned. Especially those that you know will help you to develop your personality. You don’t have to write on it every day. I certainly don’t, but when the need arises I know where to turn to. 

Take notice of the patterns of your life and see what works and what doesn’t for you. 

Use a little bit of that Fe with people you trust. It becomes extremely destructive when we let it sleep and awaken only when our Ti is having a breakdown. Tend to it from time to time. As much as we do not like it, we can’t deny that it is a part of us.

Lastly, go with the flow. Don’t try to control things that are out of your grasp!

That’s it for now. I hope this helps!

[shadowed-dancer]

BNHA Theory: Why Aoyama Isn’t the Traitor

Debunking common claims because I love my boy and don’t want him to be evil. This is all for fun, and if you still want to believe he’s the traitor then I'm not stopping you.

This will be spoiler free, and will only cover stuff we see in the anime.

“We don’t know where he was during the USJ attack”

Ok, very fair point. However, have you ever considered that the USJ attack doesn’t actually matter when it comes to the traitor? Whether it’s Aoyama or not, I don't think this is a solid place to look for clues.

We know how the villains got the class schedule, there was no need for a traitor. Shigaraki noticed the press was desperate to get in, he disintegrated the barrier, and let them storm the campus

Then, while all the students were trying to evacuate, the teachers were also busy dealing with the reporters.

We only see Aizawa and Present Mic, but we can assume the others were dealing with the security breach too (and if not, then perhaps a teacher is the traitor? it doesn’t really matter, but the point is: it’s not a student).

Now, it’s possible that Aoyama was not affected by the rush of students, as he usually eats in the classroom, but he’s still pretty innocent. Students likely didn’t know the schedule, and had no idea All Might would be taking them to the USJ. I doubt the traitor would go through all this trouble if they weren’t absolutely sure that All Might would be taking them off campus sometime soon. Shigaraki could risk coming up empty (as in, finding a schedule where All Might never leaves campus) because he just doesn’t know what to expect, but a STUDENT risking themselves is a lot less unlikely. They’d risk getting caught and possibly expelled, or worse.

As for the USJ attack itself, Aoyama was most likely hiding. I’ll talk about this more in just a second, but in scenarios where he’s put in danger, Aoyama gives up and hides (even if there’s no one around).

So why’d he call attention to his absence? Well, to figure that out we need to look at...

Aoyama’s goals, personality, and motivations

Aoyama’s shtick is that he wants to stand out and be the centre of attention, yet is constantly pushed to the background.

His costume and hero name are meant to stand out, and the way he constantly talks about how wonderful he is is an attempt to get attention. He’s also obsessed with his appearance (as shown when Mina ruins his cape). None is this proves he’s a traitor, it’s just a form of comic relief.

When he asks if anyone wanted to know where he was, only to say “it’s a secret”, he was most likely trying to garner attention and make himself seem more cool and mysterious in the eyes of his classmates, but as an audience, it’s a lighthearted moment to ease us out of the heavier storyline. Again, he was probably hiding in fear, but wanted others to THINK he was bravely fighting like everyone else, which takes us to our next point to break down...

“Dabi didn’t attack him during the training camp”

This is probably the most damning piece of evidence.. If you need a brief refresher, Aoyama is hiding behind a bush, peaks his head out, and is almost immediately noticed by Dabi (it’s unclear if the villain sees who is behind the bush or not, but Aoyama says, “he saw me”. Even if Dabi didn’t see his face, he saw that there was a person). He goes to check but is immediately sidetracked by Twice, who reminds him to call back the Nomu he sent out. Dabi proceeds to forget about the student behind the bush.

Here’s the thing; this scene says more about Dabi than it does Aoyama. People tend to forget, but at this point in the story Dabi has not killed anyone. Heck, he’s not even in the criminal data base. Maybe he’s just sneaky, but Giran specifically calls out the fact that, “he hasn’t done any flashy crimes”. If he’s a criminal, he’s never been caught.

Back to that comment about the criminal data base, it’s a detail a lot of people overlook. When Tsukauchi is taking statements from Aizawa and Vlad King, he tells All Might that they ran a search through the CRIMINAL data base, looking for a man that matched Dabi’s description, and they came up empty handed. Not the quirk registry, they were specifically looking for criminals.

Dabi’s appearance is distinct, to say the least, so even if he was caught for petty theft, they’d be almost certain to catch and identify him. But no, he’s not a criminal at this point.

That being said, let’s look at how Dabi acts during the rest of this arc. For the most part, the real Dabi isn’t attacking unless he’s provoked first. When Deku, Shoto, and Shoji fall from the sky, he attacks to protect his teammate (since the boys had just jumped Mr. Compress). The exception is when Dabi’s clones goes after Aizawa and Vlad King, but in these situations he is very much aware that the two are pro heroes and will protect their students. Aizawa says it best, they’re trying to keep the pros distracted.

This isn’t meant to be defending Dabi, but instead to point out that, at this moment, he’s not very experienced in being a criminal. No spoilers but it’s obvious that CURRENT Dabi has no hesitations about killing people (see: those thugs in the alley and the hero Snatch). But, in this arc, he didn’t seem to want to cause any unnecessary violence. For these reasons, I believe he would have spared ANY kid behind that bush, not just Aoyama (forgetting to go back after Twice distracted him was a conscious choice, it would have taken literally no time out of his day to go check who it was, and instead he decides to let the kid live). Dabi’s purpose is to seem intimidating and distract the pros, not to attack recklessly.

Whoops, I went on a tangent. Back to my twinkling boy!

Aoyama is a coward

(meant in the most loving way possible)

Aoyama is a coward. I brought it up with the USJ that he was probably hiding, and we saw it with Dabi when he was cowering behind a bush. But the important thing is that, at the training camp, he actually does get the courage to attack (specifically when he sees Deku and the others fighting back).

We see this again during the license exam

During the test, he was scared to fail, so he hid until Iida found him. And, once again, the courage of his classmates gives him the strength to act. Aoyama is just scared. Some people point to this as evidence that he’s the traitor, since he doesn’t have the character of a hero, but actually think about it. Hero society is corrupt; people are becoming heroes for a whole host of other reasons. Almost no one has the motivations of a hero out of Class 1A.

Bakugo wants to be the best, Todoroki wants to stick it to his dad, Uraraka wants to make money, Iida is carrying on his family business, and Mineta wants girls. And hey, Mineta is also a coward, so take that as you will. Not everyone becomes in the hero course is suited to becoming a hero, and that’s the whole point (it’s the entire motivation behind Stain and his followers).

“How about the secret message?”

Ah yes, the secret message. "il faut se méfier de l'eau qui dort", literally translated to "beware the water that sleeps". It basically amounts to “there’s more than meets the eye” or “watch out for the quiet ones”.

Would a traitor expose himself? Probably not, the only reason I could say yes is if the traitor was helping the villains against his will and needed to tell someone, but what’s more likely is that Aoyama knows who the traitor is.

This next little theory isn’t really based on anything, but it’s possible that, while he was hiding from Dabi and Twice, the villains mentioned who the traitor was. Twice seems like the kind of dude who’d accidentally let it slip, or if he didn’t say a name, maybe he mentioned that SOMEONE at UA is a traitor and Aoyama is trying to get Midoriya’s help in figuring it out. Either way, he may be trying to alert Midoriya that someone can’t be trusted.

Alternatively, he could be referring to both him and Midoriya, and may not be talking about the traitor at all! When Aoyama wrote “I know” in cheese, he specifies that it was meant to say, “I know you have a quirk like mine” or “I know what you’re going through”. This could be similar, attempting to tell Deku “we are the same, there’s more to us than people know because we go through things that others do not.”

But wait, “the water that SLEEPS?” Mr Aizawa sleeps! Is Mr Aizawa the traitor?!?!?!

Tangent: Is Mr Aizawa the traitor?

No. This dude puts himself at risk for his kids more times than I can count. It makes no sense for him to go so out of his way to protect his kids (like at the USJ) only to be the traitor. As well, Aizawa could have easily texted Shigaraki and been like “yo change of plans, All Might isn’t here, don't bother showing up”.

In addition, Dabi actually DOES attack Aizawa at the training camp. No one is around to see it, so it’s not like it’s for show, and Aizawa is deliberately shown to not know what Dabi’s power is. (As seen when he says, “the fire wasn’t his quirk?” when the clone melts).

So yeah, “the water that sleeps” isn’t referring to Aizawa.

Some final thoughts about the traitor

I personally don’t believe there is one. In one chapter of the manga, the teachers are talking with the principal and mention how the dorms have revealed nothing suspicious from the students. As well, when Present Mic first brings up the idea of a traitor, he actually points to a STAFF MEMBER before bringing up the possibility of a student.

He mentions that only the teachers and first years knew where the training camp was, and then says, “I guess a student could have used their phone”. He says it like an afterthought, as if the possibility of it being a student hadn’t even crossed his mind until he said it out loud.

So yeah, I don’t think a student is the traitor. I am also hesitant to think it’s a teacher since Nezu says he can trust everyone in the room during their meeting. I think the traitor theory was just an excuse to get the kids living in dorm rooms for all the goofy teenage moments that could arise from that.

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed! And I hope all Aoyama fans can feel a little more at ease, knowing their boy (probably) isn’t the traitor.