#and i didnt want to get left behind
Text
i think the reason young edizzy is so compelling is bc its like: i knew you when you were a boy, i knew you when you were a man, i knew you before you became legend and fairy-tale and self-made monster. i knew you when you had scraped knees and not enough to eat and we bonded over the bruises on our wrists like they were war trophies and not the last signs of our youth. i knew you were running away, i was too. i knew you, i saw me in you.
#i knew you were going to be amazing#and i didnt want to get left behind#now look!#my worst fears realized#edizzy#izzy hands
305 notes
·
View notes
Text
Lucky is he, Who lives unaware
#fantasy high#dimension 20#d20#fhjy#d20 fhjy#buddy dawn#the rat grinders#bakarath#oisin hakinvar#ivy embra#mary anne skuttle#ruben hopclap#potatart#i had to get these drawings out of my system. thinkng about how buddy was an outcast from the beginning#how he was left behind. how disposable he was#i think buddy is very isolated from the people around him from both himself the adults around him and the way he was raised#maybe he finds comfort in connecting with a deity#im gonna go insane. he has so much potential for good things if only he was actually given a chance#and not constantly being taken advantage of by people who dont care about him#rips my hair out#“arent you tired of being nice dont you want to just go apeshit” “dang y'all”#buddy dawn is going through it i think. just having a spectacularly AWFUL time#fhjy spoilers#NOBODY TALKS ABOUT HOW TIRING IT IS TO BE ANGRY ALL THE TIME. ITS AWFUL#hold on. i have a drawing of kalina and buddy dawn in a car running from the cops but thay didnt fit the tone of this post lol#they have walter white and jessi pinkman vibes to me. you get it#also id like to comment that the last image was meant to convey less of a#“the rat grinders didnt care about buddy dawn!!!” (though i think thats true to some extent)#and more of like. the idea that those four were saved and buddy was not#<- i like the rat grinders
66 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need to wynnepost. somebody has to
#its crazy how people will assume she is all the tropes she subverts and then ignore her#also how sympathy for circle mages’ indoctrination only lasts until they get old i guess and then fuck them#because its not as if they were ever a terrified child who’d never had anything better than a single templar’s mildest kindness and any kind#of home even if it was the tower#so an orphan kid who had no memory of anything but scurrying between farmsteads and hiding in barns#didnt want to leave. what a shock. you guys dont get the place comfort has in keeping circle mages complicit#so it’s violent and terrible and you never have privacy and your children get murdered and you’re always watched and hated#its also a warm bed and community and a chance to succeed#do you honestly think every kid from fucking THEDAS knows theres anything better out there#that doesnt make the circle good. it makes it horrific that they prey on vulnerable kids to teach them the world hates them#and only the circle is ‘safe’#i just think there should be some sympathy for those kids and what they grow up into#its easy for the player to walk in and say their character would hate the circle and never have listened to the templars#its easy for say an amell or even a surana with a family back home to not fear what they left behind#wynne genuinely thinks without the circle mages would all be murdered and she’ll fight and die protecting her fellow mages#from the right of annulment#yes its a flaw that she goes on to teach others the circle must be tolerated and that is precisely how the circle is perpetuated ove#over generations#but its amazing to me to just act like its her fault#well. this is more tags than i expected it to be
228 notes
·
View notes
Text
image I.D. below the cut
image description start:
[a promotional picture of Sam and Dean Winchester, Sam on the left and Dean on the right, their images from circa 2010. They both stare challengingly into the camera with their arms crossed, though Dean also holds a large blade. The background is a two lane blacktop with an older style of power line and corn on either side. At the top and bottom are flames. Sam says "im restricting", Dean says "and im bingeing" and the flaming text gif at the bottom reads "the eating disorder brothers.]
image description end.
#theyre both so unwell#grew up in a financially unstable environment and coped opposite ways.#and i left it broad on purpose bc theres a lot of ways you can interpret their weird shit about food#bc i too am deeply unwell i counted every time sam eats on screen (not sits next to a plate of food–actually puts it in his mouth) and its#22 times. less than twice a season. i realize this could be in large part bc jared didnt want to have to act that but im choosing to Believe#not in him but my mentally ill agenda. bc you wanna look at me and say that hes totally normal aboht this when he has a guilt complex#autonomy issues a holdup with purity/cleanliness a boatload of self-loathing and an obsession with control.#and this feels familiar so just message or comment for credit or removal :)#i dont mean to plagiarize#also i didnt talk about it much but. dean definitely sees food as an assurance of safety and turns to it when under duress to the point of#excess. and also gets very specific and protective/territorial about his food.#so.#this is a silly meme but there are so many thoughts behind it#sam winchester#dean winchester#spn#ed mention
42 notes
·
View notes
Text
its insane that cinderpelt used to be such a popular character that even tho they killed her for their story- they made it clear she was instantly reborn and would become a warrior!! but then they retconned it when it got too weird and made it to where she was "possessing" cinderheart. and now i dont think shes even been featured in starclan since then- at least not prominently to my memory
they could have just... kept the reincarnation plotline! and not had cinderheart have a weird crisis of self (which only exists to give lionblaze something to do in his chapters other than go on patrols) but whatever... i just miss cinderpelt
#warriors#waca#i also think firestar should have mentored her#even if he didnt know about the reincatnation it would be cool for him to see cinderpelt in her and want to finish her warrior training#sers tho taking out reincarnation is so dumb like we could have that be a choice cats make- cinderpelt wanted to come back right away!#after all her siblings and many loved ones were still alive- esp leafpool her apprentice she left behind on such bad terms#it could also explain faded cats/double dead cats r reborn and get another shot of life#tigerstar and hawkfrost could be unimportant bg characters right now#no theyre not splashtail that would be boring#let them live normal reincarnated lives#warrior cats#text
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
🧸♡ ⋆｡˚
#it actually does make such a huge difference omg im like ... feels like i got thrown into the floor lost my breath#having someone i like so much to talk to abt things#and share stuff and details abt not only my days but their days too#and talking abt like books that we read or shows/movies we saw and etc etc#sending pics. sending voice messages. all of that#that was so amazing wth???#it sounds like such a mundane thing but it changed my enire baseline. it wasnt a littel thing to me#i didnt share as much as i wanted to because it takes me longer to settle into smth like this#or any kind of connection/correspondence/bond/rapport#im slow bc im so scared of ppl. scared of trusting. scared of opening up. rejection rejection all of that#yeah.. takes me a lot longer than the average person to settle into smth like this#avpd is its own special hell...#i miss it a lot and i wish there hadnt been all the other circumstances so i could've actually relaxed into it#and come out of my shell completely. which i was almost there. now that mental block is gone but it's too late....#i take too long... it is impossible to be patient with me. i really hate everything abt my brain#my desire overtook my fear and it was quicker than it ever has but not enough.. :(#i miss it sm and it made me feel so so much lust for life..#but it's gone now and i can really feel the loss of it#i wouldve done anything i could to save it. or nurture it. or whatever. but it was a sacred treasure to /me/.#it doesnt matter if i try to put out the flames in a burning house if the house is gone and there are actually only the flames left#and since to me it is so special. and like. the fact that this even happened is crazy to me stuff like this feelings and connection never#happen to me. it's like.. special to talk to someone u like & have an established rapport with on a regular basis#and tell them stuff and rant abt like a book or whatever. ask them details abt their life bc u know them and enjoy knowing them#i cant just transfer all of this to someone else. i dont feel like yapping abt the book im reading into the void or someone i barely know#i just dont know... i need that sm and it was so amazing w someone i like sm. & it makes me sad i takes me too long to get fully comfortable#bc of this time were it was the most intense and long lasting for me but also im in love lmao. but other times too...#i take too long and why would someone wanna wait like actually a year (which is how long it often takes me to pass a certain barrier)#im not special. im nothing that great. it is easy to find someone else who is x1000 better than me and wont take an eternity to warm up#i just feel so sad bc i try so hard and then all of my effort just goes down the drain and then i have to do it again if i meet someone#then they'll leave me behind too and get tired of me and not like what they see and then im back at square 1 again
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Don't you guys think it's fucked up when Fiona starts dating and sleeping out of the house, leaving Debbie, Carl and Liam kind of for themselves?
Once she started dating Mike she would sleep at his place sometimes which I think it's okay, she was paying the bills and would leave dinner ready and communicate Debs and she was still looking out for them, they had health care and she took them to the clinic and all that. She needs to take care of her, live a life, sleep at her boyfriend sometimes, that's fine and healthy. But then she marry Gus and is often out of there, get together with Sean and doesn't even know what's going on with them anymore (aka "why there's nothing to eat in the fridge" "cause no one is doing the shopping" dialogue with Debbie, not knowing when it's their first day at school, letting Sammy move in and run things after her trailer got fucked by Frank), and then she gets her apartment and moves out completely and like, okay, Ian was a EMT, Lip is a mechanic already I think, she did said she wasn't going to support Debbie after her pregnancy (fucked me thinks), Carl's at military school, but Liam is still a kid! And Debs and Carl are still underage! And they are her responsibility.
It just doesn't sit right with me that Liam didn't at least moved with her.
Specifically Fiona defenders, I would love to hear more about it.
#i could he talking a lot of shit cause i only watched s6 and ahead once and it was some months ago but#i dont think im wrong. i dont there was any sort of explanation or reason or anything like that#she straight up left all behind to start fresh with her apartment her money her expensive chair didnt she#and i want fiona to grow! to do her stuff! to be only a sister to her siblings and not their mom! but she is their legal guardian#yes lip and ian definitely has to help family now. she didnt had to raise them the way she did until s3 but she did and they own her big#at least i think they do. she sacrificed herself out of love for them. made them go to school. gave them a life and some sort of stability#so now its their time to take up the responsibility with her. but thats it. with her. she dont get to abandon them.#mostly cause she is their legal guardian yk. and it was very strictly imposed and explained s3 its from here on until theyre ALL 18#and i somewhat think its okay for her to want liam to be in chicago when she left. she gave them money and he had there more stability#like she had no job yet no place to live he wouldnt have any family around to support him he would have to move to another school is a lot!#but to not make this move legally? to i dont know transfer him to lip or something? to not call and get to know how hes doing?#to not send liam $ once she gets a job or a share of her 50k every month? to not offer him to move with her once she gets her shit together#i dont like it. actually i hate it.#shameless#shameless us#fiona gallagher#og.#s9
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
Soon im rly gonna do it
#🕸️#sui mention#< in the tags tho cuz it feels nicer to talk abt this in tags than in the post itself cuz to me posts are like talking normally but tags are#like whispering? talking you can tune out if you want but whispering is rather more voluntary to say it doesnt matter however#every single year passes and i wish i didnt live in each and every one of them i feel disconnected dissatisfied empty disappointed every day#it can be a small part of a day or a bigger but its still there clenching onto me like and never letting go im tired of it theres always a#wall between me and otyer ppl im unsure if i put it there or was it put there by other ppl but its there and even if anyone tries to reach#into it do i understand how even if close are we really far away it makes me understand just how much of an abnormality i am and how much i#cant ever be like them no matter how much i try and climb and crawl until i bleed its exhausting its maddening#almost everything i do is shaped by spite i wear one bracelet for years out of spite i dont smoke out of spite i dont shave my hands not#only because im normal abt body hair but also out of spite the more i know ppl the spiteful i get only way for me to truly like someone is#to keep them at a lenght outside that wall if they get in then theres only two choices for them to dislike me or even hate my entire being#or me to shove them back out without ever letting them get in#coworkers say im a nice kind person but im not its all just a facade to make my life easier and to suit myself im hateful but i dont believe#its entirely my fault after all they will to my face make fun of. laugh at. and hate everything of me they would see in other ppl that dont#hide it deep within like i do and then it rly hits me how different abnormal foul disgusting and unnatural i am#im hit with his every talk that goes on too long every word that keeps going every touch every expression every comment made on my behalf#its exhausting to live this way i fear im near my limit i havent reached it but who knows when i will#i sometimes dream of doing it and leaving behind a note wishing nothing but painful suffering to everyone i ever knew irl but i dont want to#do that to my best friends and my dog but who knows how long its left before the thread breaks#thats all like comment and subscribe if you personally would do me a favor by taking me out back and shooting me
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinking of sunil nighttime cuddling w his "adopted" cobra child before sleep (my oc Milks Nevla).
sunil just has the TV on playing some show he doesn't even know about but he can't change the channel or turn it off bc the remote is out of his reach and he can't move cuz then he'll wake milks up. sunils usually more strict but it was a Friday night in the middle of the month, and milks wanted to watch TV w him despite near bedtime. eventually, sunil sleeps through the background noise
#i think about them often but i never mentioned my oc. ever.#milks is my only lps oc atm#idk their gender either ehh#milks was kinda just appeared out of the blue bc i think about strict dad sunil from the idw comics often#and also because i think sunil casually pulling up a baby cobra in suggestion that a baby doll should fight it is insane#so i was like “hmm how does sunil even get a hold of a baby cobra#thats like the equivalent of some dude taking a strangers baby“#so after just a bit of thinking#BOOM#milks was just a little egg in a little basket left on the doorstep of the nevla families apartment#sunil was told to not kill it (yet) despite his owners doubting sunil could understand...#he did#but sunil didnt want the cobra egg especially if it was gonna hatch#it eventually did one night while sunil was watching it#sunil a mammal wasnt exactly sure what to do with it#his first thought was feeding it ofc but sunil didnt know what to feed it or what was safe for the baby cobra to eat#so he just went with milk that he managed to take from the fridge after like 5 minutes of trying#but then the carton of milk fell splashing milk all over the baby cobra#sunil tried to clean it up with paper towels but atp sunil gave up on panicking and just went to scream for his owners attention#and they end up taking care of the baby cobra themselves while sunil watched unsure if he feels bad or should take it in as food for later#but thats basically how milks got thair name#and ironically milks is lactose intolerant#how did milks feel?#well they felt familiar with sunil even before getting drenched in milk#the logic behind this is cartoony so nothing too realistic of a born cobra#were sunils owners confused about how the milk got out of the fridge and spilled everywhere? fuck yeah they were#lps 2012#sunil nevla
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinking thoughts
#mia's ramblings#thinking abt that one time i was so uncomfortable with my friend's pda thing that i left them behind at the koi pond#like i literally just. stood up. started walking away#i still have no idea why it made me uncomfortable and even now just thinking about it makes me sick#for some reason idrk#also thinking about those times where i was so mentally exhausted from everything that i didnt have the energy to stand up so i just#didnt go to school#obviously i told people i was “sick” or “masakit pakiramdam ko” etc which i mean#its a half truth? atleast ???#and thinking about how i just want to avoid Her bc i do Not want to be dealing with their relationship problems at 6am but yk#the moment she starts up conversation i just#put those thoughts at the back of my head and pretend like im not fucking tired of her bullshit#i could be so. mentally drained. to the point that i just avoid everyone by going to coop on my own or going to 7-11 just to Breathe#but the moment someone talks to me like jack or salve or heck even kui my brain just. forces itself to act “normal” and by normal i mean no#-mentally drained yk?#like the moment literally anyone starts talking to me the thoughts of being mentally tired just get pushed back and idrk how to tell people#-that im mentally exhausted without sounding rude so i just#let my brain just bottle it up until im so tired mentally that i literally cannot function#i think its called being overstimulated? yea#which yeah basically this shit happens every. day. until my brain just goes nope youre shutting down no school for today also youre getting#-a fever too#which like??? idk why it happens???#and its not like i dont want to talk to them either#like#obviously i do#but talking to anyone when im like this makes it feel like an obligation#which fucking sucks because i dont like being obligated to do stuff i just want to do it because well#i want to??#and i feel bad for peewee bc usually he'll talk to me when im at my limit so my responses are very short and yea#this is why i always say 'im tired' whenever people ask how im doing
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
So you didn't have the love you needed.
Big deal.
It lingers for your whole life, Katie Maria // S5E16, Dark Side of the Moon // S11E8, Just My Imagination.
#supernatural#sam winchester#spn 5x16#spn 11x8#first time actually making this!!! ignore how bad im at taking good screencaps#ok so the 'love doesnt exist' obv isnt literal#there is love but what the quote follows after - not the kind of love sam needed. he loved his family as a child#wanted to hunt with them be with them he just wanted 2 show that he was capable and didnt need to be left behind#point being: i like sam a healthy amount idk how 2 get the words out so bear w my rambles#spnedit#web weaving#my edits
115 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinking back to when my sister found a disk of a bunch of home videos including one of the day i was born and my dad was just filming me laying there in the hospital for so long & u could just feel the love radiating from hit n how he was talking and i just wonder what i did so fast to fuck all that up . how did i flip that completely on its side in only like 3 years & have it never come back
#what did i do deserve . everything#i didnt even know what was happening ever#i still dont#& i feel so stuck like im just getting bigger n bigger but im never actually growing#im locked in a little box n im too big i dont fit#im filling out into all the crevices n ive been permanently molded in all these wrong ways#just left 2 rot alone#and i never even for a second got to be a real kid#i never got to be a teen because i was still stuck behind#and now im supposed to be an adult#and im just scared#& so alone#all i have ever wanted is just a bit of guidance#everythig has always just been on me#but im fucking stupid#and im always lost n just . winging everything w the highest level of terror in my heart#and so sosoos much pressure#cutting into me
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
feel v mean calling out soecific meta but im still kindve fuming over a post i saw w a bit too much engagement a few months ago implying erick couldve never gotten physical w emorty bc if he had emorty wouldve not put up w him as long or wouldve easily been able to defend themself actually it was a poll like. rallying abt what kind of abuse everyone thought emorty had endured like placing bets on how badly rick brutalized him. have we lost the fucking plot lol
#the way u can tell a lot of meta treats morty abuse as some sort of voyeuristic hobby#god i have bitched abt this on my priv so often i forget if ive said it here but i wish ppl could go#yeah i want to fuck rick n i acknowledge he is an abusive figure in his familys life or he didnt ysed to be this bad#but he allowed himself to let go of reality n become this person#like rick isnt just abusive in bed dominating ur reader in planned consenual dom settings. lol. anyways#idk i wuv rnm for having a portrayal of an abusive relationship i can actually fully relate to including the complicated codependent#feelings n having to navigate when things improve n the person gets better n what ur supposed to do when yr basically#left to pick the pieces up urself n how much of the tradegy behind their actions help n how much doesnt matter#im rambling now bc its v v late#also like enabling family when ur created in abuse it keeps going n going ppl no longer are able to acknowledge beths complicity#n jerrys apathy despite being the family scapegoat n at a similiar position to morty but its the quiet parent who tries to stay down#who enables it the most etc#summer loves her brother but gains something from the dynamic if she engages in the toxicity i could go#on#but it still comes back to rick.
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
yipee season of strike controversy solved ty devs >:)
#i didnt unlock the season yet im still veryyyy behind (need like maybe another week)#but i heard abt the nerfs and changes and Goddamn theyre BAD#its basically no rewards on everywhere and makes progression nonexistent unless ur a GigaWhale#like it doesnt matter if u spent money if ur just a dolphin ur still gna get left behind#which is crazy . was kinda bummed out on it but#didnt want to dwell on the hate that ppl r giving cuz its giving me gnshin anniversary flashbacks LMAO#except the difference here is the devs r actually Listening to the complaints & adjusting wwww#havent watched the full of volkins update vid but the adjustments the devs made r actually so good#from my understanding i think we even get more rewards than we do in base game (heavy on i think)#marilee & korin nerf kinda sucks but i understand why they decided to do that cuz .#cuz those 2 at m+ literally outdamage any dps in dream realm LMAO#but yeah!!! very happy abt their response to the complaints and feedbacks ^-^#@players and im serious abt this : Dont make it a habit to rate a game 1/5 stars with every bad thing that happens#the nerfs was literally foudn out by most players just 2 or 3 days ago!!@(*@ bro didnt even give devs time to respond#and still the response of the devs was still saur fast AND also came with great reverts on thos enerfs TT
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
thinking about how kinda fucked up it was when teachers would pair me up with other "lazy"/failing students and then act surprised when i failed their classes. what were you expecting? you literally set me up for failure??
#my mom was telling me earlier about an exchange student who was getting bad grades#so their teacher paired them up with a student who does well#and it made me think about when teachers would do the opposite#pisses me the fuck off when teachers would project laziness onto me#when i was just struggling#and then take that as an excuse to treat me like shit and set me up for failure#GOD or when teachers would actively isolate me from other students#you just want an excuse to bully a child who can't fight back#like be fr. these teachers didnt give a fuck about me#or any other mentally disabled student#we're just meant to be excluded and left behind. who cares about us since we're clearly not trying! 🙃#ok sorry for the rant lol what my mom said set me off
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
I keep reading Judy's catchphrase as a Doodlebob noise
#also keep casually collecting everybody's dreamies with minimal effort#i didnt even rly want Judy i was looking for Admiral or Dobie because i like the cranky types#the amount of immensely popular villagers I left behind is so funny#I've seen people spend real money to get these guys
5 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
yurtdisinanasilgidilir-blog
yurt dışına nasıl gidilir
manifesticons
Manifest ✈️
emmelinerossi
* // emmeline
mimo-kawaii
(⊙ω⊙)