#and i hate how i'm just constantly complaining instead of taking action but it just feels like everything i do is always in vain

[cheekblush]

spent the whole day in bed on my phone someone please assassinate me

[ponett]

I have now finally seen the Mario movie. It was Pretty Good. Here are my wordy thoughts on it. (I am going to spoil the entire movie. Duh.)

In many ways, the Mario movie does what I wish the first Sonic movie had done. They just took the characters and the premise and the world from the games, and made it a straightforward animated adventure movie. It's bright and colorful and remixes things JUST enough to include fun elements from multiple games, and it doesn't make Mario get adopted by James Marsden or whatever. It even has the music!

That's all you really need, right? Right...?

I'll get this out of the way up front. Chris Pratt was fine. He's fine

If anything, it really feels like they did the movie a disservice by letting us hear so little of the Mario voice in the previews. It took one scene for Pratt to disappear into the role for me. It was totally fine. If anything, I found Charlie Day's normal voice coming out of Luigi WAY more distracting, even if I did like him in the role.

Everyone else was pretty good, for the most part. Jack Black was obviously very good as Bowser, but I'm biased. Seth Rogen does the Seth Rogen laughs as Donkey Kong, but I thought DK was fun, too. (I liked his little rivalry with Mario where he was just constantly giving him shit.) The only casting choice I truly hated was Fred Armisen as Cranky Kong. I hated every line that came out of his mouth. He sounds atrocious. Just the worst. I swear to fucking god if they do a DKC movie and we have to hear him for 90 minutes

I did think Peach was lacking, but that was on the script, not Anya Taylor-Joy's performance. It's cool to see Peach fight, but it's one of those all too common instances where the writers put so much effort into making the main girl kick ass and be an effortlessly confident girlboss that they forgot to give her an actual personality. Not that I'd point to Super Princess Peach and its mood swing superpowers as positive representation or anything, but there's a happy middle ground, surely. Shrek was 22 years ago, just having the princess do flying kung fu kicks isn't enough.

Okay. With the voices out of the way, let's talk about the big picture:

It's way better than the words "Illumination Mario movie" implied, and I mostly enjoyed my time with it. The spirit of Mario is there 100%. But I'd also describe it as "ruthlessly efficient."

This was perhaps the main complaint critics had, and they were absolutely right. People have responded to these totally average reviews with "Well, what did you expect? Shakespeare?! It's MARIO!!" Like, yes, I would prefer it if the movie I paid to see had writing that was good instead of bad. What a shocker. My issue isn't that it's not "high-brow" enough. The problem is that it feels mercenary. It feels like an editor went through and deleted almost every line of dialogue that isn't some form of exposition, at the expense of the pacing. Any scene that's not a montage or some sort of action is kept as short as they could make it, with barely any room for embellishment, character interaction, or anything other than the bare minimum word count to hit all the typical Save the Cat Hollywood screenwriting 101 story beats to the letter. There aren't even as many jokes as you might think (and the ones that are there are extremely hit or miss, including a lot of the slapstick with Mario himself).

Mario and Peach's little arc together in the front half of the film is probably the worst example of this pacing. Even having read reviews that complained about how fast Peach goes from meeting Mario (by her admission the first other human she's ever met) to deciding to train him as the new savior of the Mushroom Kingdom, I was SHOCKED at how fast it was. They don't even lampshade it.

Peach takes Mario straight into the big training sequence where he learns how to use mushrooms and jump over platforming obstacles. Peach is apparently already a hypercompetent platforming pro and a great fighter, so there's no clear reason why she's taking the time to train this random guy to be half as good as her when the world is in danger. Then they set off on their adventure, Toad joins them, and we get a VERY brief travel montage. It's about thirty seconds total - just long enough to give Peach a line about how she wants to protect this beautiful world of hers to try and give her some stakes. We get the genre-mandated nighttime campfire heart to heart, which is exactly long enough to have Mario say he misses Luigi and to have Peach give the two sentence summary of her origin story and not a second longer. Then they reach the Kongs, and their big journey is complete. (They barely interact for the rest of the movie.) So much of the movie is like this - always ready to get on to the next scene as soon as a new one starts.

I'm not criticizing the script because I expect The Super Mario Bros. Movie to be a prestige drama - although there are certainly halfhearted attempts at a dramatic arc. The stuff with Mario's family was a fun enough idea, but again, ruthless efficiency. We get one quick scene with them at the start to give Mario some pathos, because I guess Save the Cat said he's gotta have some pathos. And then Mario gets his dad's approval amidst the action of the final battle in Brooklyn to resolve his arc, just so the movie can end as quickly as possible once Bowser is defeated. (Despite now having the approval of their family and their community back in Brooklyn, Mario and Luigi move to the Mushroom Kingdom off-screen without a single word dedicated to this decision, because that's where they live in the games.)

Look. I am not comparing it to The Godfather. Don't give me that shit. I am not asking for an extra half hour to explore Mario and Luigi's childhood trauma. I am not asking for the complex inner workings of the Mushroom Kingdom monarchy. I know this is gonna be a basic Hero's Journey adventure for kids. It just feels like it's turning down so many opportunities to have a little fun with the characters, to let them interact and play off of each other, to let there be some adventure on this adventure. This is the first time we've gotten to see these characters interact with fully voiced dialogue in a very, very long time! "Yeah, it's not High Art, but it's FUN!" Stories are fun! Character interactions are fun! The script could be having so much more fun!! It is adamantly against making the Story parts of this story-driven movie any more Fun than they functionally need to be!!!

Mario, Peach, and Toad's journey to find the Kongs is shorter than the training montage that precedes it. After the opening, Bowser mostly just sits in his castle and waits for the third act to start. Luigi's there, too, but he only gets one scene with Bowser and then the movie mostly forgets he exists until the climax. He doesn't even get to try and sneak out of Bowser's castle and get up to hijinx. He's just there to be a motivation for Mario, so he sits in a cage for half the movie. It's the bare outline of a script with action scenes added in.

Aside from the fact that it's Jack Black singing as Bowser, I feel like this overly-efficient script might be part of the reason why the "Peaches" scene stands out so much. It's a moment that didn't strictly need to be there to keep the plot moving or to provide an action setpiece. It's not even a reference to another Mario thing. It's just a fun and memorable little character moment that's there for its own sake. That's what the movie needed more of. To stop and smell the roses more often. To play in the space.

To be clear, this isn't a unique problem with this movie. Critics have been noting for years that second acts are disappearing from big Hollywood movies in favor of the Act I plot setup and the Act III action, even though Act II is supposed to be where you get to explore your actual premise. And lots of animated movies give me this exact same vibe of being too "screenwriterly," or feeling like they had an executive breathing down their necks and demanding changes based on focus testing. But these common issues are why I come away mostly feeling like the movie is on the better end of "average," rather than totally blowing my mind. You have seen this movie many times before, just not with Mario in it.

And, of course, there's the music. The score by Brian Tyler based on various classic Mario and Donkey Kong tunes (frustratingly all attributed to Koji Kondo) is absolutely beautiful, but it's unfortunately frequently overshadowed by the licensed music. Everyone already complained about things like the use of Take On Me in place of a lovingly arranged DKC medley, but it feels illustrative of the tug of war the movie is caught in the middle of, between wanting to be a lavishly faithful Mario movie and wanting to be a generic tentpole animated adventure movie. Every single licensed song used is the most obvious, overused song they could have picked for the scene. It reeks of cynical executive meddling and it took me out of the movie every time.

But there really was a lot of care and love put into this movie - more than probably any other video game movie ever made, not that that's a high bar. I don't want to underplay that too much amidst all my complaints spurred by the absolutely insane response to the reviews.

Aside from the countless background references that people will be picking apart for years, touches like the Captain Toad tune playing in the background of Toad's introduction or the Mario Kart 8 menu music playing in the kart garage really help bring it to another level of authenticity. I also enjoyed seeing some more obscure Mario enemies that felt like they were picked more for being fun to animate than for being nostalgic and marketable. No matter how many times I sarcastically pointed to the screen and deadpanned "reference. reference." I am not immune to noticing these things and smiling. I am not immune to the DK Rap. These alone don't make the movie good, but it's nice to have a video game movie that feels like it was made by people who like video games.

Most importantly, the animation is great throughout. It's leaps and bounds ahead of other Illumination work, and it's the best the Mario cast has ever looked. They even made Donkey Kong handsome, somehow. They're all so squishy and expressive, and they move so fluidly - especially in the action scenes. I particularly liked the more kinetic ones like the aerial Banzai Bill chase and the Mario Kart sequence. Truly, the Mad Max-inspired car battle on Rainbow Road where Mario literally does the speedrun shortcut is this movie firing on all cylinders.

Other, more hand-to-hand fights nail the Popeye-esque vibe Mario should be going for. He's an underdog who gets the shit kicked out of him by bigger, stronger opponents until he gets his signature powerup and turns the tables on them. My favorite animation of all probably came from the use of Cat Mario to turn the tide in the DK fight. They had so much fun making Mario move like a cat. Again, it feels like a choice made because it'd be fun to animate rather than just a nostalgia move.

It's that animation and that attention to detail that carry the film, really. They elevate it from mediocrity into being a fun watch for a fan like me, albeit one I couldn't help but pick apart with Anthony as we watched it at home. I'm glad I saw it, but there's a lot of room to improve with the inevitable sequel. I hope they do. I can't deny that I had fun with the movie, but I hope next time that fun is partially because of the script instead of in spite of it.

Stray thoughts:

Overall, I would say I enjoyed the movie a lot more than Sonic 1, but probably not as much as Sonic 2. Not that these movies need to be pitted against each other.

I hated the Luma. I hated how hilarious they clearly thought the Luma was. They have the fucking Luma break the fourth wall to end the movie and start the credits. This is going to be a deep cut for fans of bad animated films, but the whole time I was just thinking of the little fish from Romeo & Juliet: Sealed With A Kiss who's just the director's kid saying random nonsense. You know I'm right

I rolled my eyes at the "our princess is in another castle" joke and several other jokes that would have been dated in a gamer webcomic 20 years ago but I guess they had to be there

How much of Brooklyn did Bowser's giant floating castle take out? We know 9/11 happened in this universe because the Freedom Tower is there, hasn't New York been through enough

I can't believe there's a Diskun easter egg

The dog is the most Illumination character design in the movie. It felt like it wandered on set from The Secret Life of Pets

Mario being a gamer and playing Kid Icarus of all things just made me remember this tweet:

Yes Anthony did get mad at me for being thirsty for Bowser

[tocomplainfriend]

saw your thread on valentino and am curious how you would have written him instead (sorry if you have already answered this). Make his abusive actions more subtle? Take more time in establishing his relationship to the other v's so we see that he wears different masks? I wont get into it, but ive been through stuff in the past and i personally am conflicted on how I would (re)write the val character. The problems outside of the show are a different animal entirely (with twitter/the storyboard person), I'm just talking like in the show itself.

He does seem completely different from Episode 4 to Episode 6 (in the cases he is talking with Angel) so there must be something off with his consistency.

I guess for me Im trying to identify what the major mistakes are (of his charcter) and how the show could have handled them better. I doubt there's a consensus since we all experience it differently, but it's a very interesting topic.

Sorry for taking so long!

TW: RAPE/SA/ABUSE

God writing him! Could go so many ways (sorry for bad English btw)

A really basic idea! :

I personally would've taken the manipulative asshole at once. I think it is important to tell audiences going through something in the past, present, or future, how manipulation happens. Instead of taking, he is too stupid to do so. Many people that are or had being manipulated question themselves about this treatment so much. People don't need to be mastermind to be like this

I think of having the opportunity of having Angel's perspective vs Charlie! I hated they wrote Charlie as knowing what happen but never did anything? I think of having Angel by that point in the relationship where he is coming back to Val even if he constantly realizes how awful he is. Many people constantly judge the position (usually woman) coming back to an awful ex. Even r-pe victims can go thought this and face so much judgment cause people don't understand your actual state of mind nor your situation. Coming back to an abusive person never deletes their abuse. But when Charlie comes in, she meets someone who acts so nice and charming, specially to her being a princess. Which others in hell don't seem to do- thinking Angel is in good hands, making Angel feel more trapped.

Also, coming to Angel, I deal with Hypersexuality due to being a victim as well-. I believe is a really gross way of showing it. Hypersexuality doesn't equal saying cum all the time and sexually harassing others, it's a lot of unwanted thought, guilt, and feeling gross at your self. It is not something to double down on, it's something you shouldn't feel like it's your fault- indulging, without help, makes it worse for you.

Obcioulsy more than just that. Like Val making Angel feel like is worth comes from being under him, feeling like there is nowhere else to go. But again some small stuff, there are many others who their main thing is writing, many better people to ask!

Really basic, really. I'm not going to spend the little writing skills I have on this, sorry! But it was a nice ask anon!

Just a really basic idea.

There are many better writers than me out there! Search for their stuff! I mainly just like complaining than rewriting! I also recommend real stories like biographys of victims of abuse themselves if you want to read some real stuff.

Ty, for being so respectful!

[epickiya722]

An izuocha shipper said this:

Bkdks are just so transparent and easy to read. The people who rant now and want "justice for iida" are the VERY SAME people who always call him irrelevant to the story, boring, annoying, talk down his friendship with izuku and still havent forgiven him being rude ONCE to izuku in the very beginning of the manga before he and izuku even were friends (ohhhhh but anti bakugou people have to forgive bakugou ABUSING izuku for 12 YEARS, right?) and unlike bakugou didnt need over a century to apologiez! Lets be real, there is maybe just 1% of bkdk shippers who are really mad that it wasnt iida. For the majority thats not what the real problem is. They arent mad, because iida was "swaped" with ochako in the opening, they are mad because it was ochako and NOT bakugou! NOT ONE OF THEM would complain if instead of ochako reaching her hand out for izuku, if it would have been bakugou! Despite that there is no such moment in the manga between them! Its all about their shipping agenda. The anime can be as inaccurate as possible, bkdks dont care as long as bones highlights izukus and bakugous relationship even if its not manga canon.

What do you think about it? I'm interested in your opinion

And I am happy to give my opinion!!

Once more it's just other shippers trying to take a stab at BkDks and for what? Because they can't let it go. They're just bored and can't help but be asses.

For one, a lot of BkDks I have seen NEVER said Iida is boring or that irrelevant in any way. When it comes to other characters, I have seen a lot of BkDks defend them, Iida being one, Uraraka being another.

Hell, ask a BkDk who their favorite female character and most likely you'll get Ochaco Uraraka aka Uravity as an answer

No one is upset that it wasn't Bakugou that held Midoriya's hand in the opening. We're upset because once more Uraraka is just being used to fuel that role that it seems she's being forced into, which she doesn't deserve. She doesn't deserve to be a girl who only seemed to have Deku on her mind. A lot of her actions aren't even influenced by him and it sucks that others don't get that. On top of that, Iida, who a lot of us love, myself included, hated seeing his big moment taken away like that.

That's what it's more about. When that chapter came out that the opening is alluding to, no BkDk shipper I saw get upset. Why?

Because Iida is another good friend of Midoriya’s, he's also a great character on his own and it was nice seeing him getting the spotlight in that moment. It's like with Kirishima, BkDks like Kirishima because he is also a great character. He just happens to be a friend of Bakugou's. Do BkDks hate that? No!

Also BkDks and Bakugou fans aren't asking for anti Bakugous to "forgive" Bakugou. No one cares how they feel about Bakugou.

At most, what is being asked is not being so annoying about it and leave that space alone that does like his character. They're constantly the same ones sending threats, purposely tagging their anti posts wrong, commenting under fics, reblogging posts, etc. Like hate Bakugou, that's your preference and no one is forcing for a change of heart.

But how in the fuck (excuse my language) are antis going to throw the "Bakugou is a bully" card (mind you, who at the end of the day is a fictional teenager) yet do trolling and bullying REAL PEOPLE?

And!

The anime actually CAN'T be inaccurate as possible because all it's doing is ruining what Horikoshi and his team has worked on in the manga. It's why it's highly encouraged to read the manga.

I'm not surprised an IzuOcha shipper said that because guess what the anime is doing? Making IzuOcha seem more important when there's other things they should be highlighting like Iida's importance. If anyone is easy to read it's some of them.

BkDk shippers love BkDk, yeah, but most I have seen are always excited for the other characters, analyzing scenes about other characters and themes, hell, some are even multishippers so they do like other Bakugou and Midoriya ships.

Honestly, BkDks and Bakugou fans are probably the sets of people that seem to actually care about the story as a whole the most.

Ashido got a scene cut? A BkDk shipper will point it out. Shigaraki didn't say that in the manga and it's out of character? Oh, look that Bakugou fan caught it! Uraraka being reduced to nothing more than a girl with a crush despite having other great qualities that should be highlighted on? BkDks and Bakugou fans are ENRAGED.

Overall, to summarize this (it is long and I apologize for that, I ramble) BkDks in general don't care that it should have been Bakugou who held Midoriya's hand, I know I don't. We care about Iida's and Bakugou's significance to one of the darkest times in Midoriya's life. We care that Uraraka is also treated with care as she should be. If the opening wanted to have an IzuOcha moment, they could have! Just why make it the moment that should have gone to the characters that was important in that vital moment? They've been doing original scenes and whatnot forever, why stop now? Why take something away from other characters that are just as important as the protagonist and main girl character?

[sabrinasfeather]

You’re argument is that Gale is a bad friend because he ‘blamed’ Katniss for what she did to survive the games. I’ve read Catching Fire the most in the series, and there are a whopping 0 quotes of Gale doing this. Here’s what the text actually says: “He (Gale) only has his Sundays off, and I think he likes saving for you (Katniss)” and Katniss says “Hunting with Gale is still the best part of my week”. If Gale was blaming Katniss for the games, I don’t think he’d be trying his hardest to spend time for her, and I also doubt Katniss would be happy with him constantly blaming her. But wait! Hunting with Gale is still her best part of her week.

actually he does blame her and here's the proof

(He stands in the doorway as if considering whether or not to enter. He holds the unopened leather bag of food, the flask, Cinna's gloves. Gifts he will not accept because of his anger at me. I know exactly how he feels. Didn't I do the same thing to my mother? i look in his eyes. His temper can't quite mask the hurt, the sense of betrayal he feels at my engagement to Peeta.) this is a prime example of him blaming her he's mad at her for being engaged even though he is a very least somewhat aware that she doesn't want it. here's another example.("It's the way he hates you. It's so...familiar. I used to feel like that," he admits. "When I'd watch you kissing him on the screen. Only I knew I wasn't being entirely fair. He can't see that.") mockying chapter 17. so yes he was he may never have said it out loud but it's very obvious in his actions that he did blame her and the reason Gail still hung out with her it's probably because they still were trying to feed his family and yes it was still the best part of her week but she said is not the same because of the strain between them and that has a lot to do with him being upset about her being in a fake relationship with Peeta and Peeta at one point blamed her too but the difference is he takes accountability and apologizes for his actions wow gale never does deal doesn't oh and it's not just a blaming he also guilt trips her and manipulate her .

("I knew you'd kiss me.""How?" I say. Because I didn't know myself."Because I'm in pain," he says. "That's the only way I get your attention." He picks up the box. "Don't worry, Katniss. It'll pass.") this is what I'm talking about he literally admitted to making katniss to feel guilty and to kiss him oh and then he complains about her kissing him it's one of my most hated Gale moments because this it's just pure manipulation there's no buts about it he knew how she was going to react feeling to him rejected and feeling like he doesn't have a chance with her romantically and he did it anyway and that to me is gross. here's another example of him being manipulative and blaming katniss.

("I thought...I'll never compete with that. No matter how much pain I'm in." He spins the feather between his thumb and forefinger. "I don't stand a chance if he doesn't get better. You'll never be able to let him go. You'll always feel wrong about being with me.")

This is blame. Straight up, Grade A premium blame being put on Katniss because OMG she has strong feelings for someone NOT Gale. This isn’t about her feelings. This is all about him and how he’s been ‘mistreated’ by her. He’s laying all this guilt on her because he can’t handle. I hate that he was making someone else’s pain all about himself. Seriously, your “rival” has been tortured and brainwashed and all you can think about is how this affects you? While your supposed best friend is clearly miserable about this, and all you can do is just add to her emotional turmoil instead of making any kind of attempt at being a supportive friend? I never liked G/K as a ship, but Mockingjay really showed me why I didn’t like them as friends, either. there are other examples of him just being s*****t but I think you get my point.

Alright well no offense but you’re proofs don’t really change my views on shipping Everthorne.

For starters, you stated that Gale blamed Katniss for the games, not the marriage proposal. While the games were a means for survival and Gale knew that, it’s one thing to act like you’re in love with someone for survival than to getting married to someone else. Gale did not know the marriage was staged, so he was literally losing the girl he loved, to the same guy who blew her off for 6 MONTHS. I would be jealous about that too, but you’re also leaving out the crucial details, that Gale still showed up and listened to her talk. When Peeta (who knew the love act was for survival) realized she didn’t actually love him, he refused to even interact with her. For Mockingjay, yeah if would make sense for Gale to be jealous that the girl he loved was kissing someone else. But did he hold it against her? Did he stop taking care of her family because of it? Did he ghost her like Peeta did? No, because he knew that wouldn’t be fair.

For the kiss, the only way you can get that Gale was manipulating her is if you assume Gale cried so Katniss would kiss him. Which if you read the text (Gale, who I have never seen cry before) he was not cried so Katniss would kiss him. He also told Katniss not to worry about him! He wasn’t being an asshole, he was telling her she didn’t have to worry about him.

Lastly, the last quote is legit Gale admitting he knew Katniss had a special relationship with Peeta. Which is true! Best friends are supposed to be honest with each other, I wouldn’t hate a character for speaking his thoughts. And did you forget that Gale risked his life to save Peeta?? Without Gale, he’d still be in the Capital. Also, does Katniss show any signs that she felt guilted? No, no she did not. She kissed him because she wanted a distraction, and Gale stopped her because she wasn’t in the right state of mind. Wow! Such harassment! Letting ur friend go because she’s confused and not pressuring her. You’re right, Gale is such a bad person.

I’m not gonna tag this post, feel free to respond if you want, but you’re gonna have to find more proof to make me change my mind

[mira--mira]

Out of curiosity, what are your opinions on Minato Namikaze.

I guess for both in and out of Oot-verse

For Oot-verse you've mentioned about how a lot of the "shinobi families" are really just ex-Senju and while some authors make the Namikaze a small clan, I'm fairly sure that's not canon. Do would you consider him of the Senju bloodline in the Oot-verse. Since that would play better into the fact that actual civilian born are discriminated against since he was never used as an example of how far civilian born shinobi can go.

But like for a demented AU. instead of Sarutobi summoning the Terrors, let's make it Minato's problem's. Since we already know a lot of his repertoire was inspired/based off of the work of Tobirama, it wouldn't be out of the ordinary for him to just fiddle around with old seals and oh no Kushina I think I'm a dad, I just made two kids pop out of nowhere, I didn't cheat on you I swear, please stop laughing and help me.

Tbh I have a mixed bag of feelings for Minato bc I don't really dislike him as a character but a lot of circumstance/plot devices around him. I hate the "Child of Prophecy" plot point, I dislike that he's the Fourth Hokage in a similar vein, I despise Jiraiya, etc. Minato is a character that, similar to Hiruzen, suffers from other areas of the plot and lore being created first and then he's slotted in to fill gaps but this does absolutely no favors to his character, especially as he's supposed to be a paragon of Konoha. And then there's Minato trying to impress Kushina by taking her dream of being Hokage and doing it for her. That is not romantic, but the hand of the author is so obvious I feel like I can't really blame Minato fully for that.

Ultimately he's a character I don't really love but not because his actions specifically. I do like more light-hearted fics and art where he's a house husband and living his best life.

You are correct though for OoT! I do consider him part of the Senju bloodline and he would been Senju Minato if Hashirama hadn't cast off their name. He's firmly a 'clanless' shinobi, not a 'civilian' one in that universe. I don't want him to be too closely related to the main line but it does cast Tobirama being irritated at him for using his jutsu and Naruto attributing it to Minato in a funny light to me. Tobirama stomping around complaining about the Senju Youth (TM) not giving credit to his ancestors, thinking just because he had time to tweak things and/or improve them make them his jutsu now is hilarious to me.

Ooh that would be a fun AU! Terrors in the previous generation instead of Naruto's 😂 Madara would bully Obito, trying to shape him into a proper Uchiha and Obito low-key hates him, but he's a polite boy and Madara is undeniably the most powerful 12 y/o Obito has ever seen and he's trying to impart some of that knowledge and power to Obito too makes him very conflicted. Obito constantly makes running tallies of 'who's worst today: Madara or Kakashi?'

Since Pakkun attacking Madara wouldn't have happened in this AU, I think Hashirama would like a younger Kakashi quite a lot. He might remind him of Tobirama in a way and He'd make it his mission to try and get the kid to lighten up/give him some knd of big brother figure to depend on since he'd lost his father.

Both would be decent friends with Rin. Madara because he catches onto Obito's crush immediately and decides to stick his nose into it and finds Rin reasonable and level-headed. She admires Kakashi but doesn't romantically like him like Obito thinks (mostly bc by god the girls need other motivations besides boys and Kakashi's age is a timeline headache of it's own). She sees Obito as a friend, not really interested in more at this point because she's focused on her own goals to be a great med-nin. She seeks out Hashirama on her own similar to Sakura to ask him to teach her, but she's much more respectful to Hashirama than Sakura is to him. I really like jinchuriki!Rin so that'd be part of this AU 100% and then a lot of her arc would be mastering that power through medical ninjutsu somehow.

Eheh this is becoming about Rin, back to Minato. I like to think his reasoning to 'keep' the terrors would be "It's great practice Kushina before we have kids" and Kushina, an Uzumaki, clearly recognizes Senju Hashirama and Uchiha Madara is like...:my dearest husband...this is both a terrible and BRILLIANT idea. If we can handle them, will be pros" (let Kushina be a little impulsive and wild plsss). The big issue would be them trying to keep the terrors because...the Uchiha haven't been massacred at this point. Madara would want to be with them but the Uchiha leadership is have a crisis because that is Uchiha Madara and they made him into a Ghost and banished him and Amaterasu turned away from them because of it. But also the coup is brewing and maybe this is a second chance to do it over. Either way, the only thing that unites the clan at this point is the belief that Madara will either be their salvation or damnation again.

[young--cheeseburger]

Mid-Year Self Reflection

I turn 24 next month and I've been depressed since I was 11-12 years old.

These past few months have been really eye opening and I've been learning more and more about myself and how I coped with the world for so long isnt healthy. Nor how I saw myself.

I knew I'm depressed but seeing the tangible depths of my depression come to bite me in the ass has really been eye opening.

Ever since I broke down in September-October of 2022, I've been in a state of mourning. As well as the most "unstable" I've been. Looking back at it, it was probably a long time coming.

Feeling like I failed college not only becauae its not easy to get into but also because I didnt put my 100% and then realizing that I can't do art as a full time job anyway really left me in a bad state because I covinced myself it was all I had. And it really felt like it was. Most likely being its something I genuniely enjoyed throughout everything, even me being depressed. Drawing was fun, being able to physically see myself improve was fun and wanting to get better at this skill that I had actually felt good. It felt really good. But I am also my own worst critic so that probably didnt help things either. And since its a medium that does require my emotions to put into it (even if its silly little drawings) I've cut myself off from those. Maybe not completely but I've been in this very stagnant state for a really long time.

Hell me saying that sentence says a lot to me. "Stagnant" is like a mental checkpoint for me since thats how I described my life in High School of all things.

There's a quote from Night In The Woods where Bea tells Mae "I stayed here and got older, and you went away and stayed the same." and it really hit me since Mae also had the opportunity to go to college and didnt change. Mae is a lot more "aimless" and wants to chill and hang around though. Meanwhile I give myself way too harsh standards and constantly fail to live up to them. (geez I wonder who I got that from) Both seem like ways to cope with becoming an adult the more I think about it.

Anyways.

I'm at least glad I have some awareness towards my problems and will always try to take responsibility for my actions when I can. Its because of these issues and a few other things that I lost a few friends along the way. Although its for the better really. I was taking a lot more than I can really give and I wasn't appreciative of friendships, nor the time given by them. And as we get older in life, the less time we're able to give. I don't wanna be someome whos holding anyone back or anything. And no friend should feel like they arent cared about.

I use apathy to cope with not feeling depressed but instead it turned off any other kind of emotion and it grew into me not feeling much of anything at all. No emotions to help guide choices, no emotions to share, no emotions to feel towards anything really. In my mind, if I stopped caring, things wouldnt hurt as much.

I usually didnt talk about emotions because I didnt want to dump on people but also because I kept invalidating my own feelings. A lot of people I know have been through so much worse and here I am. Still with a family, even though they throughly hate who I am as a trans man. I got hit a few times as a kid for making mistakes/disiplinary reasons but I had friends who's parents did so much worse. So who was I to complain in the face of all of that? I should be helping them get through it then worry about what I felt because my problems seemed minor in comparison.

Comparison, the same thing my parents did constantly when I was younger until I started being the one getting compared to. Because "I can do everything right" right? A perfect little mold even if I was a dying dog. Loyal, but at what cost?

"I'm sure theres people who care about me but I don't really care too much anymore. I That just means I am really weak. Useless even until the end. I want to die. The pain would only hurt for a little while before everything is over."

That was a consistent thought in my head for so long. And I've wanted to die for so long. But up to a few weeks ago, I had actual plans for doing it too. Several ways even.

It wasnt till an old friend told me that my ways of thinking were only making me feel worse. And when I told myself I'd listen for once, I did. Before walking out again because once again, I had taken someone's emotional labor for granted.

I realized now that, yeah people will always have it worse. And yeah I can totally do my part to make sure that the people I know, friends or strangers can at least feel better. But I have to realize that what happened to me hurt me too so I can finally let it go.

I want to move on with my life, I really do. It sucks not having a bunch of the adult skills I need (driving especially) but its never too late to learn. I have time and I need to start giving myself the time like I would for others. To stop being at odds with myself and try to be neutral with my existance, instead of not caring. To want to live, to hope, even if nothing is concrete. To be like water, instead of a brick.

Trying to say that last part with this capitalist hellscape in mind is hard but people like me have survived.

Maybe I can too.

[latineslytherin]

I recognize what people are trying to do with No Post November, to showcase how no one deserves to be harassed for their ships. But I cannot help but think refraining from posting... isn't gonna do anything.

Psychologically it's the equivalent of taking away all the toys from all the students because one student was mean to another. All it is gonna do is making people resentful of the ones who complained, and say shit like "the block button is there" (which true it is, but there are ways to circumvent the block button and unfortunately tumblr staff is slow to respond to harassment reports unless it's in excess).

This is employing negative punishment. which is unlikely to cause long term changes in the collective fandom's behavior. Why? Because it works only for as long as the stimulus (fics) is consistently removed. And when it stops, the undesired behavior is highly likely to resume. Additionally, while it can stop an undesired behavior, it DOES NOT provide information on what the desired action is.

And what is the desired action? Showing there is NOTHING wrong with shipping jegulus.

So I offer a counter solution and i only offer it because I have seen fandoms where this worked. Primarily in the Dragon Age Fandom.

Instead of calling for no post. we get other people to create more jegulus content. Celebrate it, comment n existing jegulus works, and showcase what the harassers hate, that it IS okay and that you have a large support system of people who like or will support people who make that content.

because in my experience with the Dragon Age Fandom, we did that. Some of us (me included) spitefully made the content that was getting people harassed and uplifting other creators of it. And the loudest of the harassers fled tumblr to twitter, leaving behind a more positive and supportive community.

Anyway... thats just my thoughts. I can't change your mind. I'm just pointing this out and the alternative methods that could be used with better results.

And as an aside, a lot of jegulus shippers tend to hate on Snape fans (its not like Snape threatens their ship, but just because they prefer to see regulus as the "better slytherin" or whatever nonsense) , and celebrate when Snape fans getting harassed... so I could be petty and enjoy the schadenfreude but I can't help but use this as a teaching moment to point out: you see how it feels when people harass you just for what ships you like in fiction? now imagine that just for liking one character - not even shipping him with anyone - just liking a character. That's a Snape fan's entire experience with the HP fandom, On tumblr, twitter, tiktok, facebook, instagram, everywhere and everyday. Harassment constantly. Not posting fanworks never worked, but what has let us keep going is celebrating each other and helping each other out and specifically - and this is the important part - not harassing others for the characters they like and the ships they ship. We may dislike/hate the characters and ships, but we leave the real people who like those charcaters and ships alone. The only time we do anything, is when they attack us. We are reactionary and we support and defend each other.

And I know, jegulus is a rarepair and there's probably not as many of you as there are Snape fans, but perhaps... use this moment to reach out to your fellows and make them recognize they shouldn't harass others in the fandom for any reason because you might very well end up on the wrong side of the greater HP fandom's current "undesirable" ship/character.

-signed a Snape fan who has had to defend other Snape fans from Jegulus shippers who harassed them because of their dislike of Snape and preference for Regulus as the "good slytherin"

[crabbybun]

some women wear skirts so short you can see their vagina and anus while kids are outside

I'm feeling combative today, so now seems like a good time to answer this ask that's been sitting around a while.

See this anon is in my inbox because I had the gall to respond to a previous ask of his on a blog I follow.

This one, in fact:

I hate hate HATE how badly 'pedophile' has been watered down because length of a mini skirt =/= "pedo bait." Pedo bait doesn't exist. Like point blank period; change my mind. Not to mention, wearing clothing is not "pedo bait" especially as an adult like the logic doesn't logic here. While I didn't get into all that, as a result of seeing this insane shit, I said something about how weird sending this to a random girly themed blog is - because it is fucking weird. The blog in question just posts super girly fashion and aesthetics; the fact that anon here saw that and went to envisioning women's genitals is uh. Not Normal. I got the ask at the top there as a response to me calling him weird.

BUT, instead of addressing the absolutely shit logic at play here - logic that puts undue importance on clothing, especially clothing on female bodies in a way that is not only misogynistic as fuck but frankly it's victim blaming in all the worst ways (how about you just don't look?) - I want to talk about the consequences of actions.

That is - did y'all know some fucking Karen with this SAME mentality went on to literally pull off the mini skirt of a literal teenager to try and make this same illogical point?? Bitch called the cops herself (stupid criminals be stupid) to try and have the teen arrested for indecent exposure or something, and ended up charged with sexual battery and fired from her job, then had the gall to complain that the victims posting the video of her misbehavior to TikTok put her life in danger. She is 49 fucking years old - far and away old enough to know better - and ended up taking a plea deal on the charge; they lowered the felony from class A to class B, which means no sentence will be imposed for a year as long as Karen here complies with the terms: undergo a mental health evaluation, do not contact the victim and don't commit any further crimes.

Because it's fucking WEIRD to be that obsessed with what young girls are wearing and whether or not they're too exposed. It's so not normal. Especially at that age. Like. Why are you, an adult, constantly looking at young girls like that? Why are you, an adult, focused on the genitals and asses of young girls? Why are you, the adult, trying to check the skirts of young women? Why are you, the adult, constantly talking about the genitals and asses of young women? Why are you, the adult, trying to impose your sexual conversations on young women? Do you - the adult - really think you're "protecting children" by putting adult focus on the privates of young adult women?

Literally this mentality is exactly like the cops in Iran that killed that Mahsa Amini over not wearing her hijab properly. Go live in a convent or something if you're that offended by the real world; or commit a crime like Karen did and get yourself locked up Idc either way it will remove you from the general pool of society so that average people don't have to put up with your absolute outer space shit.

[kiss-my-freckle]

Tyler and Caroline would constantly have sex (Caroline had a lot of action in general) but they aren't shamed for their sex life nor is Caroline slut shamed nearly as much as Elena is. Also Tyler and Caroline had sex in 5x5 and avoided talking about their problems and Tyler delayed talking about his purpose being there was going on a break with Caroline and saying goodbye to her since she kept urging him to join that semester even though he wasn't ready to be in college at the time. They had sex after the council's funeral and Bonnie's funeral but the fandom doesn't consider them insensitive while Delena is seen as insensitive for having kissing in 6x12 because of Liz almost dying and having sex in 6x21 because it wasn't their wedding. People say Delena have sex instead of communicating about their issues just because of 5x16. People claim Elena was a worse friend than Caroline to Bonnie even though she brought her back to life in season 5 and 6. This comment irritates me:

Elena and Damon STALLED Jo and Alaric's wedding by going off to fuck?! How could you possibly think that is acceptable behavior when you are the maid of honor and best man? Especially after Elena kept making everything about herself the whole day! They are lucky Kai came in and ruined that wedding because if I were Jo or Alaric I would've been beheading THEM. All they ever did was fuck after they got together. They were a selfish couple. Him murdering Aaron because she broke up with him also springs to mind. And she didn’t care as soon as she found out it wasn’t her. They really had to make it about her when Jo was dying on her Wedding day while being pregnant. if elena didnt check her phone too, who knows when they would have stopped. When Caroline’s mom had cancer and almost died, Elena immediately started making out with Damon and realizing that “life is too short. Mortal or not. I don’t want to waste another minute.” Like what? You’re literally vampires. Wedding parties have responsibilities to the people getting married that are more important than horniness especially the maid of honor and best man.

Damon and Elena communicate better than most characters in the show because they're open and honest and understanding of each other. Communicating as they do doesn't require they sacrfiice their sex life. They're capable of both despite what fans prefer to believe.

Delena had the right to kiss in 6x12 and they certainly had the right to have sex in 6x21. Alaric and Jo weren't the only characters in that episode ffs. A couple that are in love are likely to take off before a wedding to have sex, just as a coule are likely to take off before a funeral to have sex as Tyler and Caroline do in 4x2. Damon choosing to take the cure gave Delena all the more reason to have sex before Alaric's wedding because Damon solidified his vampire-version wedding proposal. That's why their sex made sense, and why they pan out this way...

Who cares that they got so caught up in each other that they were late to the wedding. Like I said... fans will find the most idiotic reasons to hate on them because said fans are bitter af. Me personally, I'd have no problem with a couple taking off to have sex before my wedding, but I'm also not self-absorbed. I'm pretty sure I didn't see Alaric or Jo complaining about it.

[fizzingwizard]

Was curious how many of the Sims 4 bugs on this list I've encountered… it's a lot

Part One because I guess this is too many bugs even for tumblr hahaha

Jumpy Animations/Sims teleport - since a long time ago but worse now Routing/Sit down issue on several interactions - love to watch my sims wander around like ants looking for somewhere to sit with a chair right in front of them. especially love when I tell me sim to go play a game at the card table in the same room, and instead they go outside, walk around the entire house, come back in and then sit at the table. guess they just felt like a walk first lol Music from other modes Plays During Live Mode - yup and usually overlapping. fix with restart but it often happens in CAS where you lose all your stuff if you quit… Lag for menu to show up when clicking on objects - especially the fridge/oven!!!! Sims keep moving after paused Sims do DU homework under laptops - not just DU tho I get this for anything that can be done at a table, including eating, and sometimes it's not even a portable laptop but a computer Sim won't accept queued commands/ Sims don't do actions - this was supposedly "console" but as a non-console player I know it happens to the rest of us too. also to most of us Lots with manipulated terrain look realistic/strange in world view - idk if this is a bug, i think probably that's just how it appears. but it is weird Fishing Identification for active Sim with no fishing skill - I think this one has been around since base game. Sims 4 really wants everyone to love fishing. I'll be like. mourning the death of Sim Grandpa. And all of a sudden 6-year-old Sim Grandson will "identify the Perch!" Multiple daily calls for sim to switch careers - CONSTANTLY. EVEN WITH PHONE ON SILENT MODE! Excessive use of Cross Stitch Basket - yep. I get it the worst with cross stitch, but I find it annoying that other hobbies which cost money like knitting and painting are autonomous as well. Either there should be a "practice" object which is the default and is free or this stuff shouldn't be autonomous. Food too tbh… I have tried playing rags to riches before, and one reason I gave up was just this - it was so hard to keep control of finances because sims have no concept of saving pennies lol Railings Clipping Through Walls - hate this so ugly Multi-story columns misaligned Foundation becomes see-through Sim Gets Fear of the Dark After Being Cured - all the fears and wants sucked. they're boring, curing then is boring, they have little impact except just ruining your sims day, and YEAH, they come back after being cured!! best to turn it off just like neighborhood stories Constantly dirty surroundings moodlet from Pressure Cooker and Kettle - I'm not 100% sure I've got this one, I will check the next time I play. However I've had multiple issues with these objects: sims constantly cooking with them when their queue is empty, and constant fires originating with them. Lately my sims was complaining her kitchen was dirty but I could not find anything dirty. She's a Neat sim, but even after having her clean everything, and then going into build mode and moving stuff to look for plates that might have gotten stuck under objects and are hard to see, the room still registered as dirty. I'm thinking it was the pressure cooker or kettle, or maybe even pizza oven which she also has Upgraded beds give two contradictory moodlets - yup spend hours upgrading your bed and the sims like "what a bad sleep!" Sims on home lot don't take care of needs when active sims away - yeah two sims in my house recently almost starved bc of this NPCs take food ordered by active Sim - yup! again ruining my rages to riches haha No evolve option (ready to evolve) - yes and yes I've checked that the plants are in season. Also having major issues with other gardening things especially on community lots Very High Household Bills While On Vacation Campfire causes too many fires - really frustrating for me bc I use the campfire a lot. I absolutely love camping gameplay but between constant fires and thunderstorms where you're 100% guaranteed to get electrocuted (9_9) it really sucks

[rebeccccccaaa]

ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ ʀɪɢʜᴛ _____________________

ʙʀᴏᴛʜᴇʀ’s!ʙᴇsᴛ!ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ!ʙᴜᴄᴋʏ ʙᴀʀɴᴇs ᴀᴜ

sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: You and Buck have always been close growing up but you two soon learn that the line that separates friendly and flirting is a lot thinner than you think.

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: fluff, slight angst bc u got a shit bf, big bro vibes from bucky, smut duh [18+ minors dni (slight praise but also slight degradation, marking, belly bulge, squirting, fem!rec oral, unprotected sex, plz be safe irl, slight choking, pet names: darling&princess, i think that’s it lmk plz)]

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ’s ɴᴏᴛᴇs: hey assholes i'm back for the time being lol. I have a few ideas and fics I'm currently writing right now so do not fret.

______________________________________

You knew this was a horrible idea. 

It’s Saturday night and you and your boyfriend were back in another night club after being kicked out from one just hours before. Daniel had gotten too drunk, as he always does, causing you to kindly ask the bartender to cut him off. Daniel didn’t take that too lightly resulting in a gnarly swing at the poor guy just doing his job. 

Security threw you out and Daniel called an Uber to go where you thought was going to be your apartment but twenty minutes later you pulled up to another club practically on the other side of town. You yelled at Daniel but he pushed aside stumbling inside for yet even more drinks and mistakes waiting for him inside. 

You sat at the bar simply drinking some water and snacking on some peanuts keeping your eye on your garbage boyfriend. You're constantly checking the time on your phone, annoyed with every passing minute. It was 2 am and you just wanted to go home and sleep. You were even debating texting your brother Steve hoping you could just crash at his place not too far from where you were but it would be incredibly irresponsible to just leave Daniel in the state he’s in. 

So you waited and waited and waited. Your eyelids felt heavy and your energy was just completely drained. You were basically a zombie. It wasn’t until a guy approached your half asleep body that you felt a sense of alert. Daniel was shit-faced so you were practically defenseless. 

“Hey,” the guy shouted over the music.

“Sorry, I’m not interested. My boyfriend’s-” you quickly said, only to be cut off.

“Don’t worry. I’m not gonna hit on you. I’ve got a boyfriend of my own,” he chuckled, making you breathe out in relief. 

“Sorry,” you cringed at yourself. 

“It’s alright; but uh, I hate to be the one to tell you this. You might want to check with your boyfriend,” he said sympathetically. 

You pushed your way through the crowd scanning every face in search of Daniel. What did he do? Is he hurt? Did he get in trouble again? Is he getting arrested? Where is he-

“Daniel?” you said eyes tearing up a bit. 

His arms were wrapped around another girl’s waist as he kissed her the way he kissed you. She practically moaned as their tongues slobbered disgustingly with each other. Their hips grinding against each other proactively as if you weren’t even there. Sadness turned to anger, and anger turned to rage, gripping Daniel’s short hairs and pulling his head away from whoever this girl was. 

“What the fuck?” the girl complained, her eyes completely bloodshot. 

“Did he tell you that he was here with his girlfriend tonight?” you're sad with gritted teeth. Daniel stumbled around still unable to register what the hell was happening. 

“Oh my god, you forreal?” she said.

“Who fucking cares? She’s a prude anyway. I got more action with you than I did her in the past, what, six months?” Daniel slurred. 

“You know what, you’re a fucking prick, dude. She deserves so much better than you; I bet your dick is small anyway,” the girl said.

“Fuck you too bitch,” Daniel spit. 

“I can’t believe you,” you said. 

“Oh, whoop-dee-doo, big fucking surprise. Babe, you’re a prude. Can’t you see it? I don’t know why I’m wasting my time with you anymore,” he practically puked out the words without any second thought. 

“Fine, then I hope you enjoy the rest of your night, you fucking asshole,” you stormed away holding in the tears; he wasn’t worth it. 

Almost three am and you just dumped your cheating lowlife boyfriend on the other side of town. Steve wasn’t answering his phone and you even wanna be near the club anymore. Walking speedily staring at your screen desperate to call an Uber home, you bumped harshly into a hard chest falling to the ground on your bum. 

“Fucking hell, I’m so sorry, darling,” the man said helping you up by your elbows.

“It’s ok. I wasn’t looking- Bucky?” 

“Oh, hey kid. What are you doing? It’s like three in the morning and you don’t live anywhere near here,” Bucky said, crossing his arms. 

“Daniel got himself kicked from the one by our apartment and Ubered here instead.”

“So where’s Daniel?” Bucky scowled; he’s always hated that guy, so did Steve.

“Probably fucking some other chick in the bathroom,” your voice cracked. 

“What?”

“It’s nothing; I just want to go home,” you cried.

“Hey, it’s ok; it’s ok. Do you wanna crash at me and Steve’s? He’s gone for the weekend with Peggy; you can stay in his room at least for the night,” Bucky offered; so that’s why Steve’s not answering his phone. 

“I don’t wanna intrude on your night. I can just call an Uber, it’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. Steve’ll kill me if he found out I left his baby sis alone in the streets of New York at three in the morning. It’s not a problem, we were just bar hopping and I stopped drinking ages ago.”

“Are you sure, Buck?”

“Of course,” he smiled warmly at you. 

“Hey, Nat!”

“What’s up?” a beautiful redhead approached you both.

“Gonna head home ; don’t do anything stupid,” he chuckled. 

“You too,” she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, “Catch you Monday?” 

“You’re stupid. I’ll see ya,” Bucky laughed before grabbing your hand and headed towards his apartment. 

“Thanks again, Buck. For letting me stay here tonight,” you said once you entered his apartment. 

It had been a while since you hung out at your brother’s apartment but nothing’s changed. Typical men and their inability to change even a throw pillow. You set your small bag on the couch before Bucky led you to Steve’s room. There were pictures of you and him posing at Steve’s graduation; and later your own. Pictures of Steve and Bucky at a theme park, during a bar-be-que for Steve’s birthday. So many memories that Steve held onto in his room. 

“Time really flies doesn’t it?” Bucky said, slightly startling you.

“Sorry,” he chuckled.

“No, you’re fine. But you’re right. Feels all these pictures were taken yesterday,” you reminisced. 

“I got you some clothes if you need to change; I’ll give you privacy,” Bucky said, slipping from the room briskly. 

You sat on the bed frustrated with everything. Your body was so drained from being up so early in the night, to the fight with Daniel. The past couple months with him were so awful. He was just so mean to you all the time and you didn’t know what you did wrong. Where did it go wrong? When did things shift?

"Is everything ok, darling?" Bucky asked quietly, knocking on the door when you hadn't come out after a while.

"What did I do wrong? I thought he loved me," you choked out. 

Bucky sighed as he walked over to the bed sitting beside you before engulfing you in a warm hug. You cried into his shoulder and Bucky couldn't help the anger that bubbled inside him for your excuse of a boyfriend Daniel. He never got along with the guy and now he finally has a reason to knock his teeth in.

"You didn't do anything, I know it. That prick wouldn't know love if it hit him in the face. It's his loss. You deserve so much better than that asshole. Look at me, you're so beautiful and funny and fucking adorable; any guy who can't see how perfect you are, is a dense piece of shit." 

"James," you whispered. 

His words made your heart skip and your stomach flutter. But Bucky’s always had that effect on you. Even growing up. You weren’t going to sit there and pretend that hearing his words hadn't had a deeper effect than they would’ve coming from Daniel. Sometimes you wondered what being with Bucky would be like. You’re not the first to admit how handsome Bucky was and growing up you did have quite the crush on your brother’s best friend.  

You don't know what it was, whether it was the alcohol still swimming through your veins, or just feeling so vulnerable being in Bucky's arms but you wanted him badly. You needed him, needed to feel something again. And you knew he could give it to you. You pressed your lips to his and in an instant his hands dropped to your hips pulling you impossibly close against his body. Your hands went to the back of his head as you kissed him messily. Your noses bumped and teeth clashed but it was the best kiss you’ve ever had. 

“Fuck, your brother’s gonna kill me,” Bucky mumbled, almost to himself, as he slowly laid you down on your back.

Bucky’s hands trailed up your thighs, squeezing the soft flesh every now and then as he continued kissing you passionately. Your own hands couldn’t help but tug at his shirt desperately. When he did so, your breath was completely taken away. It had been years since you’d seen Bucky without a shirt. 

Not only had he been quite skinny just like your brother back then, but not long after leaving for college with Steve he was in a bike accident that left him with ghastly scars and burns along his left arm and shoulder. Since then, it’s fair to say Bucky never really ever took his shirt off. It had taken years just for him to remove the glove he’d always wear to cover the scars on his hand.

“You’ve gotten so strong, James,” you grinned, reaching out to brush the flexed muscles running down his front. 

He simply stared at you with an anticipating and anxious expression on his face, waiting for you to state the obvious. When you didn’t, when you pulled his head down to kiss him once again, he almost cried. Bucky hadn’t been with a woman in so long, afraid of this very moment. He knew at that moment, there was no one quite like you. 

Bucky fell in love. 

“Let me take care of you, darling. You’ve been so good to me,” Bucky whispered huskily in your ear as he trailed his hand under your own shirt brushing his fingertips along the underside of your breast.

His lips pressed softly against your hot skin along your neck before standing up between your legs at the end of the bed. He pulled your shirt off then played cheekily with the straps of your bra that you still had on. You smiled back at him with the same playful stare, reaching behind you to unclasp the material. 

You could see the way Bucky’s eyes darken and his pupils widened as he stared in awe at your naked chest. Your skin bursted into chills under his hungry gaze even though you felt like you were burning up. Bucky leaned forward kissing down the valley of your breasts, nipping once in a while playfully before laying you back down. He shimmied you out of your bottoms easily, kneeling on the ground leaving you completely bare before him. 

“You are absolutely stunning, princess,” Bucky whispered, running his hands up your thighs slowly. 

“Bucky, please. I need you,” you whimpered. 

“Don’t worry, darling. I promise I’m gonna take good care of you,” he smirked devilishly. 

He pushed your knees open, eyeing the arousal that glistened between your thighs. He brought his fingers up to you slowly rubbing your slick around before finally pushing a thick and long finger past your folds. Your body shuddered solely at the foreign but pleasurable feeling, already moaning softly. 

Bucky’s cock strained through pants upon hearing your beautiful moans; they were like music to his ears. He couldn’t help the way his hips would buck into the mattress in a desperate attempt to relieve some pain from his erection. Soon after he pulled his fingers from you slowly only to thrust them further in you, curling his fingers just right. 

He brought his mouth down to you, wrapping his lips around your clit sucking harshly. You gasped and your back arched, overwhelmed with pleasure Bucky was giving you with just his mouth and fingers. All the times that you’d given yourself to your ex, he had never made you feel this good before, feel this full; let alone with his fingers. Bucky was taking his time with you solely for your own pleasure and it made your heart swoon. 

Your legs trapped Bucky’s head between your thighs, squeezing as he continued to eat you out like a starved man. Your hands went to his hair pulling on his dark locks causing Bucky to moan deeply against you. You were so close to a release; your legs shaking violently and your stomach tightening. 

“Come on, princess. Want you to come all over my face. Can you do that for me, darling?”

“Fuck!”

“Be a good girl and make a mess,” Bucky teased.

His fingers moved faster as he swirled his tongue around and over your clit just as quickly. You were becoming overwhelmed and that coil bursted in the pit of your stomach. You pushed Bucky’s face from you, shrieking with pure pleasure; Bucky’s kept the rapid pace with fingers as you fell over the edge.

“Fucking hell, that was so hot, princess,” Bucky said standing up; his fingers, arm, his chest was covered in your arousal. 

“Did I do that?” your voice trembled. 

“Because of me,” Bucky winked playfully.

“I didn’t know I could do that,” you let your head fall back on the bed as you briefly caught your breath.

Bucky grabbed his shirt that he discarded not long ago and quickly wiped his chest and arm before discarding his pants and boxers. He nearly moaned at the feeling when he finally freed his dick from the restraining garments. His hand instantly wrapped around the base before pumping himself a few times. 

You brought yourself onto your elbows momentarily ogling at the sight of Bucky completely bare before you. Your mouth practically watered at the sight. Bucky crawled over you kissing you deeply and messily; but perfectly. He pulled away and you both had goofy smiles on your faces before bursting into a fit of giggles, Bucky’s head burying into the crook of your neck.

“You’re so goddamn adorable, princess,” Bucky’s voice was muffled. 

“Bucky,” you whined. 

You couldn’t resist squirming underneath the burly man. Although, you’ve just had what was probably the best orgasm you’ve ever had, you wanted more. You needed more; you needed Bucky. 

“I got you, darling. I got you.” 

Bucky wanted to tease you more, make you beg, but he was just as desperate to feel you as you were. He propped himself up on his elbows kissing you one last time before reaching between your bodies and lining his dick with your entrance. Both you and Bucky moaned simultaneously as he stretched you out; curses spilling from his lips as incoherent moans fell from yours. 

“So fucking tight, princess. Squeezing my cock just right, aren’t ya?” he whispered.

“Fuck, I feel so full,” you whimpered.

Bucky began to slowly move his hips in and out of you deliciously. He quickly picked up the pace, jetting his hips rapidly making your moans louder. Bucky sat up on his knees and gripped your waist surely to leave bruises in your wake. This new angle surprised you and you couldn’t help the squeals and moans that left your mouth. You chanted Bucky's name like a prayer; as if it was the only word you knew. 

Bucky watched you carefully, your face contorting with pure euphoric pleasure. He couldn’t help notice the small bump in your lower belly and without a second thought, he grabbed your hands pressing them firmly over your tummy. 

“You feel how deep I am, darling? Fucking poking through,” Bucky grunted. 

“Shit! Oh, it feels so good,” you moaned. 

“That’s right, no one’s ever gonna fuck you this good again. This pussy’s mine now,” Bucky growled. 

He took one of his hands and wrapped it around your throat squeezing the sides gently but firm at the same time. Your eyes rolled back and you moaned even louder, confident that the neighbors were sure to complain in the morning. Feeling Bucky’s hand around your neck was so exhilarating; you and Daniel had never ever experimented with anything beyond a pair of handcuffs, and that particular night went horribly. 

You like being choked by Bucky. 

“Fucking slut; you like this, don’t ya?” he came down to whisper huskily against your lips. 

“Mh-hm,” you moaned with a devilish grin, your bottom lip resting between your teeth before your eyes rolled back again. 

“Such a fucking beauty you are.”

Bucky hips snapped in and out and he knew it wouldn’t be long until he needed to release.

“God, I’m close, princess,” he growled. 

His hand moved to rest on the back of your neck to pull you up so you straddled his thighs and your chest was flushed against his. Your sensitive and hardened nipples brushed against his slightly sweaty skin causing you to shudder in pleasure. Bucky’s lips attached themselves to your skin along your collar bones sucking harshly leaving purple marks all along.

Your legs shook once again as they did before and soon enough with an arched back and shout of Bucky’s name you came all over his cock. Overwhelmed with your sex, Bucky bit harshly on your shoulder in a poor attempt to muffled the loud groans and moans he elicited. Feeling your velvety walls squeeze tightly around him pushed him over the edge, coating your walls with hot ribbons on cum. 

He fell forward almost crushing you but you were too tired to complain. Bucky continued to pepper soft kisses all over your skin whispering how good you were to him, how beautiful you looked. Just absolutely showering with compliments. You felt him slowly getting off you, probably afraid he was crushing you, but you didn’t want him to leave just yet. 

“Don’t,” you whispered, wrapping your arms tightly around his body. 

“I don’t want to crush you, darling.”

“You’re not.”

Bucky chuckled before settling completely above you, careful not to make you uncomfortable. Hardly any time went by when he felt the even and soft puffs of air hitting his skin, sure that you had fallen asleep. He picked himself up and with major guilt for his best friend, picked you up from the bed and walked you to his own room. 

After he was sure you stayed sound asleep, Bucky grabbed a clean pair of boxers and hurried himself to Steve’s room again. He collected all the discarded clothes and the dirty sheets and tossed them in the washing machine to clean right away. 

He hadn’t meant to fuck his best friend’s little sister, let alone in his own room, on his own bed, but it all happened so fast. 

He went back to his room letting the clothes do it’s thing, and quickly grabbed his phone. He messaged Steve, telling him that when he got back for his weekend with Peggy, he really needed to talk to him. 

Tonight made Bucky realize how much he loved you. Growing up, you two had always been close. But he doesn’t know when he stopped being friendly and instead began flirting. Bucky wanted to be with you; he knew it now more than ever. 

Bucky watched your gorgeous sleeping form on his bed. He smiled to himself before opening the window; the sun already rising and those beautiful golden rays seeped through the glass window, making you look angelic. He crawled into bed cuddling flushed against your naked body. He chuckled softly when you realized he’d returned, wiggling even further into his arms. 

“I love you, Bucky,” you mumbled. 

“I love you, too, darling.”

And he really, and truly did love you. As did you love him. 

=======================

ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: (For all my work)

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Bucky Barnes Taglist:

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[chaeryybomb]

BRUTAL

pairings: female reader x best friend!jungwon

summary: they told you that these were the golden years, but to you "golden" was a rusting metal spray painted yellow. the story of a seventeen year old trying to survive high school when all you do is try your best. but your best friend jungwon makes it worth the while. 

genre: high school au, friends to lovers, fluff, tiny bits of angst if you squint, attempt at humour

featuring: jang wonyoung, kim sunoo & nishimura riki 

word count: 4.5k 

warnings: reader having a existential crisis most of the time, strong language, mentions of insecurity

the sour series masterlist

You slumped forward the moment the bell rang, letting your head hit the table. You could care less if a bruise would form on your forehead, you had much bigger things to worry about. Your teacher left the class wordlessly as the class was busy doing their own thing. And by that, everyone was buried nose deep in studying. You lifted your head to see the different books of the same topic scattered on your desk, a yellow highlighter balancing on the edge of your table.

Reaching over to grab the highlighter, you turned your head over to the side to look at your desk mate. Wonyoung sat there looking straight out from a k-drama, with her hair flowing down her back perfectly and her slender nimble fingers moving as she continuously wrote in her notebook. She was smart too, fluent in English and Korean, great at maths and science. And on top of that she was kind and friendly, everyone loved her. You did too, you had the honour of calling her your best friend. But sometimes you felt insecure around her, everything she did looked flawless and there you were just trying your best.

"Ack!" You yelped as you sat up straight, holding your forehead. Wonyoung rolled her eyes at you with a small smile on her lips, she had flicked your forehead to get you out of your thoughts.

Without taking her eyes off the textbook, she tapped your own workbook with her pen. Silently telling you to stop procrastinating. You pouted at her and looked at the clock, 10 minutes before lunch. Maybe a walk to the girl's bathroom would do you some good.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom," you whispered to Wonyoung. She nodded and smiled at you before you walked out.

As you strolled towards the girl's bathroom, you passed by the bulletin board outside your class. A bright blue poster stood out with the words "ENJOY YOUR YOUTH" in white. Scoffing at the message, you continued on your way.

"I'm seventeen now, where's my fucking teenage dream?" You muttered to yourself. You were tired of waiting for your life to end up like a coming of age movie. Everyone told you that these were the golden years and you should enjoy your youth, but you swear to god if you hear another one of those cheesy sayings, you might just cry on the spot.

Reaching over to open the stall door, you halt in your actions when you heard familiar voices talking.

"I'm so worried for finals, my parents are gonna kill me if I fail English again," a girl complained. You hear the sound of tap water running. "How are you so calm during this time, Mirae?'

"What's the use of studying hard anyways," the second girl, Mirae, said. "We all know the top spots are gonna be taken by Jang Wonyoung and Yang Jungwon, I just study enough to pass."

The other girl snorted at her reply. "Imagine if those two got together, the power couple of the year," she suddenly said.

"Poor Y/N then, she's gonna be over shadowed by them."

"As if she already isn't. I almost forgot they were a trio until you mentioned Y/N," the girl laughed.

"What can I say? They're out of her league," Mirae joined in with her laughter.

The two voices faded away as you heard the door closed. Finally pushing the door open, you looked at your reflection. Your eyebrows knitted in annoyance and your face was morphed in a scowl. You washed your hands aggressively and poked the inside of your cheek. What bugged you was that they were right. You were the black sheep between Wonyoung and Jungwon. Both of them were smart and amazing, and you're just…you.

You love your best friends, you truly do. But you were constantly compared to them and you hated it. Everyone wanted them, you watched as guys tripped over to confess to Wonyoung and girls squealing when Jungwon smiled at them. The two of them always reassured you that you weren't beneath them but you were sick of their sympathy. You're so caught up in the news of who likes you and who hates them. You just wished people liked you more.

Storming out of the bathroom, someone accidentally ran into you and caused you to fell onto your butt. The student immediately stood up and scurried off, not bothering to even a mutter an apology. All I did was try my best and this is the thanks I get, you thought bitterly.

They said that these were the golden years, but you wished you could just disappear. God, it's brutal out here.

"Y/N, wait up!" Jungwon called after you.

You stopped in your tracks as you watched Jungwon waved goodbye to some students before jogging towards you.

"You heading to cram school today?" He asked you as the both of you fell into the same walking rhythm.

You shook your head, clasping your hands behind. "I moved it to Thursday instead, Wonyoung said I had to many things on Tuesday," you told him. Originally, you would be heading to the library to study before heading over to the cram school. But Wonyoung took one look at your schedule and decided that you did not had enough breaks, so she managed to convince you to take the Thursday slot instead. Thursdays are one of the days where you would not go to the library.

Jungwon seemed to be disappointed to find out that you had switched slots. Maybe he should changed slots too, but does he have any empty spots open for Thursday though? He'd have to check later. Instead, he coughed and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"Do you wanna come over later? The new Demon Slayer movie is out," he offered, hoping that you'd accept.

Unfortunately, you once again shook your head. "Sorry Jungwon, I'd want to cram even more later. Finals are really creeping in and I can't afford to waste any time," you told him with a sad smile. As much as you would like to ditch the books and watch Demon Slayer, the glaring C on your last history paper was telling you otherwise.

You stopped walking when you had reached your doorstep. "Thanks for walking me home, Jungwon. See you tomorrow!" and with that you disappeared behind the door.

Jungwon waved goodbye as he watched the door closed. The smile on his face dropped and his shoulder sagged. Jungwon you idiot, of course she would want to study, he scolded himself. With disappointment on his face, he trudged home with a heavy heart.

"Change of plans, guys," he announced as he swung the front door open, unfazed by the fact that Riki and Sunoo were lounging on his coach. He accepted the fact that Sunoo had somehow gotten the keys to his house (suspecting that his mother probably gave it to him due to favouritism or maybe Riki had sneakily made a copy).

Riki's head poked out from the couch. "She rejected you, didn't she," the younger boy said with a smirk.

Jungwon's face ears turned red as he glared at the boy. "No she did not!" He immediately told him. "She rejected the offer to watch the movie, that's different!"

"That's basically rejection, hyung," Riki laughed.

The other boy just glared at him. "Shut up!" he sputtered out before hiking up the stairs.

Sunoo gave Riki a look, to which the Japanese boy just shrugged his shoulders innocently.

Jungwon walked out from the shower, a towel around his neck with one hand running through his damp hair. Sunoo and Riki had left earlier, finally giving him some peace and quiet. His phone screen was flashing from his study table, initiating that someone was spamming him (quite aggressively) with text message. With a raised eyebrow, he picked up his phone

[7:09 pm] wonyoung: JUNGWON

[7:09 pm] wonyoung: JUNGWON

[7:09 pm] wonyoung: JUNGWON

[7:10 pm] wonyoung: WHY DID Y/N JUST MESSAGED ME ABOUT HOMEWORK

[7:10 pm] wonyoung: ISNT SHE WITH YOU

[7:11 pm] wonyoung: I THOUGHT YOU SAID U WERE GONNA WATCH A MOVIE

[7:11 pm] wonyoung: DEMON HUNTER OR SMTG

[7:12 pm] wonyoung: WHY IS SHE ASKING ME FOR HW

[7:12 pm] wonyoung: DID U CHICKEN OUT???

[7:13 pm] wonyoung: omg u chickened out didnt u

[7:14 pm] jungwon: jfc wonyoung

[7:15 pm] jungwon: and no i did not chicken out okay

[7:15 pm] jungwon: she declined

[7:16 pm] jungwon: she said she had to study ;-;

[7:17 pm] wonyoung: omg u suck

[7:17 pm] wonyoung: i told u the movie idea was dumb

[7:18 pm] wonyoung: but do u ever listen to me

[7:18 pm] wonyoung: no

[7:19 pm] wonyoung: and now u suffer the consequences

[7:20 pm] jungwon: yea yea i get it im dumb

[7:20 pm] jungwon: now what's ur solution the great jang wonyoung

[7:21 pm] wonyoung: i am so glad u asked :)

[7:21 pm] jungwon: oh no

[7:21 pm] wonyoung: stfu im giving u a better idea

[7:22 pm] wonyoung: a n y w a y s

[7:22 pm] wonyoung: my ynradar is going off and she's s a d

[7:23 pm] jungwon: how would u know

[7:23 pm] jungwon: she seemed fine today

[7:23 pm] wonyoung: stfu jungwon its best friend things u wont understand

[7:24 pm] jungwon: i-

[7:25 pm] wonyoung: and as her future bf u SHOULD start to train ur ynradar

[7:25 pm] wonyoung: anw its exam season stoopid

[7:26 pm] wonyoung: and its when those kids start to talk abt how the both of us are gonna get top scores

[7:26 pm] wonyoung: and they talk down on y/n while doing so

[7:26 pm] wonyoung: assholes

[7:27 pm] wonyoung: so i propose to u

[7:27 pm] wonyoung: a ✨ study date ✨

[7:28 pm] jungwon: i

[7:29 pm] jungwon: that's

[7:29 pm] jungwon: actually not a bad idea

[7:30 pm] wonyoung: obv i came up with it

[7:31 pm] jungwon: can u not

[7:31 pm] wonyoung: anw a study date

[7:32 pm] wonyoung: she's struggling in maths

[7:33 pm] wonyoung: specifically taxes because she said and i quote

[7:34 pm] wonyoung: "why do we have to do taxes when we pay people to do it for us"

[7:34 pm] wonyoung: so pls help her and try to cheer her up

[7:35 pm] wonyoung: and confess coward

[7:36 pm] jungwon: i make no promises for the last one

[7:36 pm] wonyoung: aFTER EVERYTHING I JUST SAID

[7:37 pm] jungwon: what if she rejects me wonyoung

[7:38 pm] wonyoung: WE'VE HAD THIS CONVERSATION A LOT OF TIMES JUNGWON

[7:38 pm] wonyoung: SHE LIKES U BUT SHES TOO DUMB TO REALISE

[7:39 pm] jungwon: sigh

[7:40 pm] jungwon: fine i'll try thanks wonyoung

[7:41 pm] wonyoung: np i expect y'all to be a couple by next monday <3

[7:41 pm] jungwon: i-

Sighing for the nth time of the night, Jungwon sat on his bed. He allowed the towel to slipped off his shoulders as his thumb hovered over your chat icon. Truth be told, he always thought his crush on you was unrequited love. You never showed any signs of returning of feelings so he thought he would just ignore the feeling until it was gone.

But oh boy was he wrong, because he didn't knew that he would be spending his high school years by your side. And now you occupy his mind 24/7. Wonyoung could literally tell that he was in love with you, but somehow you never caught on. He allowed Sunoo and Riki to convince him to do the whole "movie date idea", but that failed. So Wonyoung's suggestion was his only option left.

He typed out the message, ready to send it out. If only he could just press the button. Come on Yang Jungwon, you can do this. Just press the damn button Jungwon. Suddenly his phone pinged loudly, scaring the lights out of the poor boy as he yelped and his phone landed with a thud on the ground. He peered over his bed, as if his phone was a ticking bomb.

Oh, it was a message from you.

[8:01 pm] y/n: hey do u know where wonyoung is

[8:01 pm] y/n: she isn't answering my texts

Oh no. He realised that your chat was open, the two ticks indicated that he had (unintentionally) read the message. He couldn't just leave you on read. That's just evil. Scrambling to get his phone, he immediately typed a reply to cover for the other girl.

[8:02 pm] jungwon: sorry i don't :/

[8:02 pm] jungwon: what do u need her for

[8:03 pm] y/n: mf was supposed to teach me a maths question but she left me on rEAD

This was his chance! It was the perfect opportunity for him to score a date with you. Okay, breathe in breath out Jungwon. Don't mess it up and just ask her, he mentally prepared himself.

[8:04 pm] jungwon: oh i could help you if you want

[8:04 pm] jungwon: yk with finals coming up and everything, i can help you study

[8:05 pm] jungwon: if you want of course

[8:05 pm] y/n: omg srsly??

[8:06 pm] jungwon: pls help me study my braincells are literally dying

[8:07 pm] jungwon: jdsjkda okay how about this saturday at your place?

[8:08 pm] y/n: yeah sure

[8:08 pm] jungwon: cool its a date then!

You blinked at Jungwon's message. A date? Wait, did Yang Jungwon just indirectly asked you out? Nah, nah. You were overthinking it. Yes, definitely overthinking. Don't kid yourself, why would Jungwon ask you out on a date? Jungwon is just a friend, you tried to convince yourself.

Keyword: tried.

If he really was just a friend, then why did it felt like butterflies were in your stomach when he said "it was a date"? Then why did you frowned when those girls said that Wonyoung and Jungwon would make a good couple?

Oh god, do you have feelings for your best friend?

Saturday came faster than you would have liked it to. Ever since that last chat with Jungwon, it gave you the sudden realisation that you did in fact had feelings for your best friend. You tried so hard to avoid him in school because you don't want the butterflies back in your stomach. It was basically confirming the fact that you like him. Well, avoiding him also confirmed the fact but you choose to be in denial about it.

You didn't tell Wonyoung about your study date but lately she's been sending you outfit ideas on Pinterest. Specifically, date outftis. And whenever you tried to ask her a question about school, she brushed you off with a random excuse. So it left you no choice but to save those questions for Jungwon.

Speaking of Jungwon, he had texted you 10 minutes ago that he was on the way. You were standing in the middle of your room with your hands on your hips. Both of your parents were out for the day, which left you alone at home. You had taken out the low table to be used later and it was currently in front of you. Colourful workbooks were neatly stacked on top of it.

You did a 360 turn around your room. Was it messy? You cleaned it this morning when you woke up. Did you had any clothes out? No, doesn't look like it. For some reason, you were a nervous wreck. You blamed Jungwon. He just had to call this a date, didn't he.

Should you change? Maybe you should finally look through all those pins Wonyoung sent. Wait, no, why would you have to change into something nice. Jungwon was here to help you study, just that.

Yeah, a study date, your mind emphasised on the word.

The sound of the doorbell pulled you out from your thoughts. You immediately went to open the door. Yang Jungwon stood there on the other side, with his signature smile. Had he always resembled a sheep? He just looked so fluffy.

"Hey!" You greeted him with a smile, internally wincing at your way-too-enthusiastic voice.

But Jungwon didn't seem to mind it. "Hey!" he greeted back.

You moved to the side to let him in. "Thank you for having me," he said as he bowed then proceeded to remove his shoes.

"Uh, do you want anything? Water?" You asked him.

He shook his head.

"Ah, cool. Let's head to my room," you started to walk back to your room.

"Where are your parents?" He asked.

"Out," you simply replied.

That was when it dawned upon you, that your parents were not home. Leaving you and Jungwon, alone. Together. In your room. Alone. With the boy you potentially have a crush on.

"Y/N?" Jungwon tapped on your shoulder. You had stopped walking when you were suddenly washed over by your thoughts. Snapping out of it, you sent him a small smile before opening the room to your door.

The both of you shuffled into your bedroom, you sat down in front of the low table while Jungwon settled down next to you. He moved to take out his books then turned to you. "How about we do some studying and if you have any questions, you can ask me okay?" He said.

You nodded and flipped your own workbook open, immediately starting to work on the first question. Jungwon copied your action and a comfortable silence engulfed the both of you. As the time passed, you found yourself stuck on a certain maths question.

You slightly turned your head to the side to look at Jungwon. He was concentrated at doing his work, you felt a sense of deja vu while looking at him. He resembled Wonyoung when she was studying. At the thought of Wonyoung, you suddenly thought of what those girls said at the bathroom.

They would make a good couple, wouldn't they, you thought. The power couple of the year.

The butterflies in your stomach faded away into an uncomfortable feeling. Just the idea of them getting together already made you sick. You bit the inside of your cheek, you really did had feelings for him. And now it scared you because what if he doesn't feel the same. You made a mental note to consult with Wonyoung later, at least you hope that you'll allow yourself to tell her.

Jungwon must've noticed you staring and gently tapped your head with his pencil. A contrast to when Wonyoung painfully flicked your forehead.

"What's wrong? Are you stuck on a question?" He asked.

You leaned back a bit at the sudden action. You were so deep in your insecurities that you had totally forgotten about the literal problem sitting in front of you. Yet you couldn't even bother to ask him so you just shook your head. "I'm gonna get something to drink," you said instead.

Jungwon watched as you stood up, then decided to follow you as well. "I'll come along."

The boy joined you in the kitchen, perched on one of the island stools as you grabbed a can of soda from the fridge. He studied your movement as you worked around the kitchen. Your features were neutral, you weren't smiling nor frowning. But he could tell that your shoulders were tensed. Wonyoung was right, you did seem down. And he cursed himself for not noticing earlier.

"You okay?" His question made you stopped in a mid-pour stance, the can of soda was tilted but not enough for the contents to be poured out.

You brushed his question off and poured the drink into the cup. "Yeah," you hummed.

Unconvinced by your answer, he pried more. "You know you shouldn't care about what they say, right?"

You furrowed your eyebrows at him, pretending like you didn't understand where he was coming from.

"You're not below us, you know that right?"

You couldn't help but scoffed at his words. Jungwon's lips tugged downwards "I'm being serious here, Y/N," his tone was stern. "You shouldn't listen to what they say. You're more than just-"

The sound of the can being slammed down shuts him up. Your fingers tightened around the can as you looked at him. You didn't had the energy to hear him preach the same old "Don't Listen To Them" speech. You don't need his pity.

"I don't want to hear it, Yang Jungwon," you said through gritted teeth. Not sparing him another glance, you threw the empty can into the trash as you grabbed your glass.

As you walked past Jungwon, he suddenly reached out and held onto your forearm. "Y/N," he said softly. "Please tell me what's wrong."

You sighed and slowly turn around to face him, placing the glass back on the counter. You took in a deep breath before you opened your mouth. "I feel like I'm not enough," you finally said. "Everything I do just doesn't seem enough. All I'm doing is my best but it's just crushing my ego because everyone is telling me that you're better than me."

"I feel like no one wants me and I hate the way I'm perceived. It's always poor Y/N this and poor Y/N that's because everyone just sees me as your shadow and I fucking hate it. I only have two real friends," you gestured wildly. "And lately I'm a nervous wreck cause I keep comparing myself to the two of you. I'm not cool and I'm not smart, and I can't even parallel park!" You threw your hands up in frustration, the feelings you kept inside were pouring out like a waterfall.

Jungwon just stood there as he listened tentatively to every word. He didn't knew that you felt this way, bottling up all your emotions like that.

"And I'm so tired of people telling me to enjoy my youth and that these are the golden years. I might just fucking cry if I hear those words again," you finished ranting. It felt good, it felt like a weight on your heart has been lifted. Then you remembered that you just dumped all of it on Jungwon.

You opened your mouth to apologise to him but he surprised you by pulling him into his arms. At first you were standing stiffly at the sudden contact, but it took a millisecond for you to melt in his embrace. His arms were gently around your back and you returned the hug by wrapping your arms around his torso. The two of you stay in that position for awhile, relishing in each other's embrace. You definitely needed this hug.

Tightening your hold on Jungwon, you realised how important he was to you. He was your best friend and he was always there for you. It was stupid of you to compare yourself to him, when all he did was tried his best for you. The taller boy chuckled when he felt you rubbed your face into his shoulder, he involuntarily released a contented sigh. You felt one of his hands stroked your hair, it felt comforting. That action itself was enough for the butterflies to slowly settled back in you.

After a while, both of you finally (unwillingly) released each other. He pushed a strand of hair behind your ears and said, "You're wrong by the way." Which made you tilt your head in genuine confusion.

"You are cool and you are smart. You're like the coolest person I know. And no one thinks of you as our shadow, you don't hear it but I've always hear the juniors praising you for helping them and how enthusiastic you are," the way he delivered his words was filled with pure awe for you.

"And who cares if you can't parallel park. You didn't hear it from but Jay hyung failed his drivers test three times just because he couldn't parallel park," and that got a laugh out from you. Jungwon smiled proudly that he managed to make you laugh. "And you're wrong when you said no one wants you. I want you."

You blinked once, twice and thrice. He wanted you? "You're just saying that cause you're my best friend," you replied.

"No," he firmly said. "I like you, Y/N."

(Jungwon doesn't know where he got this sudden surge of confidence, but the mood was the perfect time for him to confess. It was a one time chance and he had to take it.)

You chuckled. "I like you too, Jungwon. We are friends aren't we?"

"No, Y/N. I like you. More than friends."

"Oh." Oh.

"Yeah," he scratched the back of neck awkwardly. Oh no, did you not feel the same way?

While you on the other hand, were malfunctioning on the inside. Your best friend just confessed to you and you were frozen on the spot. Why couldn't he had done it over text instead. If he had done it over text, then you could've left the message unread and you could've spammed Wonyoung for help. But the thing is that it wasn't over text and you couldn't just tell him to wait here while you panicked to Wonyoung in your bathroom.

Yang Jungwon likes you. And you like him too, right? Because if you didn't, your cheeks won't be heating up right now and your heart would have not be beating rapidly like it was going to break your rib cage any second. If you didn't like him, there would have never been butterflies in your stomach. Yeah. You like Yang Jungwon, you like him a lot.

"Me too," you whispered, it was soft but it was enough for him to pick it up. Jungwon eyes snapped to you, doe eyed filled with hope. "I like you, too," you said, this time louder. And you made sure you looked him in the eye when you confessed.

You watched as Jungwon's mouth morphed into a big grin. He let out a sigh of relief and dropped to his knees, surprising you. "Jungwon!" you squeaked, bending down to help him.

"I'm fine! I'm fine," he assured you as he stood up with your help. The grin on his face was still there. "It's just that … you like me," he breathed out. "You like me back, wow. I-I can't believe it."

Your face was definitely burning with embarrassment. You punched him lightly on the shoulder, turning away to hide your face. "Believe it, you dork. I like you, okay!" Somehow his grin was able to grew wider at your words, Gently, he took your hand in his.

"How about we stop this study date, and I'll take you out on real date?"

© chaeryybomb 2021

a/n: thank you so much for reading this <3

[ultralovedeluxe]

Yan! Wamuu with prompts #20 and #23

This was requested by the lovely @teachillvibes, thank you so much for requesting! Hopefully this came out nicely ^^

‘I can’t live without you anymore!’

‘Please don’t scream at me like that. You know how much it hurts me’

Warnings: Naga Au, yandere behaviors, kidnapping, masturbation, nsfw, hypnosis(but not really), non/dub con, badly written

  It almost felt like an eternity.

 You don’t even remember when he took you. One day you were having a good time with your husband and friends, next you were getting abducted by a monster you regret befriending. But should that be your fault? Maybe. After all your husband always warned you to stay away from nagas. Even now, you wish you had listened to your husband’s words. Nagas were not creatures to be messed with. You wished you had just gotten ridden of the thought that, maybe, just maybe, some nagas were friendly and kind-hearted. You were delusional enough to believe that this one was different. That this one wouldn’t hurt you. Unfortunately, nagas were dangerous and feral creatures, and you were just delusional.

 “[first], I have returned, I brought the sea urchins you love so much”

  He was here. The monster that claimed to be your ‘mate’ was here. The only true moments of happiness you felt in your imprisonment was when he was gone. Because in that small amount of time, you would think about how your husband was doing. Was he happy without you? Or was he looking for you? You could never be sure. Letting out a deep sigh, you look behind you to see the naga that had kept you here. The sight of him no longer brought the same comfort it used to have. Now you truly began to see the horror behind his appearance.

He was a man, or atleast had the appearance of a man from head to his torso. The rest of his body is what made him threatening to you. Below his "human" appearance, the Naga Wamuu had the body of a snake. He was far larger than you, far larger than any human for that matter.

Sometimes you wondered if he'd eat you, or if he'd feed you to more of his kind. But no, you knew what Wammu wanted from you. You knew exactly why he was keeping you in this position. And quite frankly, maybe the thought of him eating you wasn't so bad.

You didn't even feel Wammu's tail wrap itself around you. You felt disgust rush through your body as the naga left passionate, but almost impatient kisses on your temples.

"Dear pet, I can't bear the thought of staying alive without you anymore. But please, enlighten me, why do you seem so displeased with my touches? Am I not enough for you?" Wamuu asked as his grip on you tightened.

Was he humoring you? Was this an actual, genuine question? And here you are thinking you were the delusional one.

You wanted to spit in his face and yell at him for all the things he's done to you. For taking you away from your village, for forcing you to live in this hell he calls your home. But in fear of angering the naga, you stay silent. However, you still needed to answer his question, because he would get mad regardless.

"Wam- I mean, dear, I'm just not in the mood to be held by you. That's all.." you said, quickly correcting your mistake. Ever since he had captured you, he had forced you to call him pet names to satisfy his deranged fantasy he had with you. Acting as if you two had been lovers for years, as if you had always been the little human house-wife he could come back to after hunting.

 Wammu hummed in understandment, but you knew he didn’t understand. In fact if he truly understood you he would have let you go already. Let you live outside this dull, dark cave and allow you to return to your village. You snapped out of your thoughts as Wammu began planting small kisses on your neck once again. Oh gods..you only hoped Wammu didn’t want to ‘treat’ you tonight. This was usually always a sign when he wanted something, or wanted to give you a treat for being ‘such a good little human’. You remember all the times he had made you gag on his monstrous cock, and then forcing you to swallow his semen as a reward. You tolerated his physical gifts a lot more, because you can’t exactly gag on glorious jewels he had gifted you over the course of staying here. 

 Wammu pressed his lips against you once again, completely savoring the feeling of your dried lips against his. You looked so adorable when you were obidient, he was glad that you weren’t causing any trouble or trying to escape. “My dearest [first] , I will be heading out tonight for some errands, stay inside and don’t let anybody in unless it’s Kars, you know I trust you.. If you are good tonight, I’ll spoil you like the queen you are” he said, unwrapping himself around you. His larger body towered over you, so you simply nodded. The naga leaned towards your face and kissed you again, and you kissed back while carressing his face softly; just as he liked. 

 “I’ll see you soon”

--

 You were bored out of your mind. One of the reasons you hated this cave was because there was no color to brighten up the mood or anything to do. You would just sit around and ponder, until Wammu came back. Maybe you could rearrange your jewels again, just like last time. Maybe you could organize them by shape instead of color, who knows. Maybe Wammu would bring you something to enteratin yourself today. A sewing kit or a painting canvas would be nice. Your thoughts soon drifted off to think about your husband. You missed how his sapphire blue eyes would look in the sun. Oh how you missed tangling your hands in his soft, blonde hair. It was always so soft and wavy, you wondered how he would look like with his hair down. You missed they way he would teasingly hold onto your hips until you gave him a kiss, or whenever he would kiss your chest without holding back. 

 Before you knew it, your pants were gone. You were spread out on the bed Wammu had gifted you when you had ‘obeyed’ his wishes. Your hand had gone down to touch your throbbing clit, and it felt amazing. How long have you been neglecting yourself? You didn’t remember, but for now you just wanted to enjoy this time you had for yourself before Wammu came back. 

 You rubbed your clit slowly with a gentle force. Those small movements were enough to have you whimpering out softly. It just felt so good. To finally touch yourself after weeks of being away from your loved one. You imagined it was your husband prepping you up, so you could easily take him in. You imagined the gentle tone in his voice, constantly praising you throughout your session. He was always so gentle and sweet, but at the same time he was dirty and rough when he wanted to be. Your hand movements became desperate, moving your hips in order to gain some friction. 

 “Hn, Caesar..please-”

 You couldn’t help but to moan out your husband’s name. In fact you did it several times. You wanted to see him again, you wanted to leave this place so you could feel safe again-

 “How dare you think of another man while I’m gone!” 

 You quickly reached over to grab covers, but Wammu didn’t let you; as he had already made his way over to you. You had never seen Wammu this angry before. Sure he has given you his fair share of punishments, but he always kept a poker face. At the moment, anger was clearly visible on his face, and he wasn’t afraid of showing it. 

“Wammu please! I’m sorry! I won’t ever do it again!” you knew it was useless, but trying to plead with him wouldn’t hurt, right? (yes it would, you knew you were in danger, and that there’s no escaping your punishment). Wammu grabbed you by the hair and lifted you up like you were a piece of paper. “Put me down! Please Wammu don’t do this!”

 Instead of hitting you as you first assumed, Wammu placed a rough kiss on your lips. “Please don’t scream at me like that darling, you know how much it hurts me. But your actions have consequences..” While all you could do was look at him in fear, Wammu then proceeded to slap your throbbing clit. “Seems to me you don’t need me to prep you up. You can take both of my cocks well, right pet? After this you will never think of a man other than me ever again”

 Before you knew it, you had lost control of yourself.

--

 The cave you were in was filled with despair and the occasional shimmer from your jewels. Currently, the cave you were in was filled with the hot sounds of Wammu’s twin cocks slamming against your already wet sex. His pace was rough, without any pauses in between. Your moans and pleas were nothing but music to Wammu’s ears. He enjoyed how easily you stopped complaining and fell into the pleasure he could give you.  As for you, the only things you could hear were Wammu’s grunts into your ear, along with the clapping of your sex against his. 

 “Ah Wammu please go slower!” you whined, but Wammu did the complete opposite. He went just a tad bit slower, but made his pace rougher than it was before. “I’m afraid I can’t do that pet. Do you love me? Do you enjoy what we’re doing?” he asked while thrusting himself in you, while at the same time rubbing your clit with a gentle amount of force.

 “Yes! Wammu please let me cum!” you moaned out. Never in your life did you think you’d be ravished by a monstrous man. Wammuu hummed in amusement as he slowed his pace and bit your neck softly, “Then say my name pet, who can make you feel this way?”. You were at your climax, “You Wammu! You’re the only one I swear!-” you whined as you came on Wammu’s cocks.

 Wammu laid you down on your bed, “Now pet, who is your one true love?”. You could barely open your eyes, “Cae- you Wammu..” you whispered, clearly still tired from your 'love' making session.

 “Guess we’ll have to try again..”

[epickiya722]

Alright, I really tried to hold myself back from ranting and posting this because apparently my posts are "too much", but whatever. My blog, I do whatever. I'm done, I am.

Because these hate anons keep coming around and being assholes (I apologize for the language), I'm keeping anonymous off for a while. I don't know for how long, but it really does seem pathetic how so many of you really do be going into people's inboxes because you can't handle that some of the fans of BNHA (of any fandom really) do like the villains. To the hate anons who are so go gun-ho and up in arms about fans who like the villains, Endeavor, Bakugou, AFO, or any other character of this franchise - I hope you do read this and get offended. You are pathetic. You are miserable. You really can't handle someone being a fan of Toga so much that instead of blocking that blog so you don't see the posts, you harass that person? You are so "offended" because some favors Shigaraki, that you send actual threats to that person? You are so that into yourself because someone's anime crush is Bakugou?

You've not only have way too much time on your hands, but you are as I said MISERABLE.

These are fictional characters! Yes, I get that a character may remind you of someone you don't like or maybe you just hate that character just because. Your reasons are valid, but your actions on how you express distain for that character? Down-fucking-right disgusting.

People always wanna complain about how the fandom is toxic, but the same people are the ones who make it toxic. You hate anons go out of your way to make everyone's experience bad that you lack the common sense to...

BLOCK TAGS AND/OR BLOGS

STAY AWAY FROM THE CONTENT THAT DOESN'T PLEASES YOU

STAY ON YOUR OWN BLOG AND FIND OTHER BLOGS THAT SHARE SIMILAR TASTES AS YOU

USE THE APPROPIATE TAGS

It's easy to just make your Tumblr zone comfortable if you weren't so fucking stupid. Tumblr provides blocks and filters for a reason, assholes. Use it. Don't...

GO INTO PEOPLE'S INBOXES WITH SOMETHING STUPID ABOUT "OH, THIS CHARACTER SHOULD DIE, THIS CHARACTER IS AN INCEL"

REBLOG CONTENT JUST TO ADD ON UNWANTED CRITICISM

STALK OTHER'S BLOGS

USE TAGS TO DRAW ATTENTION BECAUSE YOU SEEK NEGATIVE ATTENTION AND WANT TO START DRAMA

The irony that some of you go "Bakugou is a bully, he's mean, he's a Mary Sue" in people's inboxes when you're displaying the same behavior. The irony of you antis going "Toga is a parasite, Shigaraki is throwing tantrums, Endeavor is abusive"! Uh, you're the parasite because you're sucking the life of fans who just want to have a good time. You're throwing the tantrum because someone likes some fiction. You're abusive because you're constantly nagging and nagging at a person and mentally and emotionally breaking them down like a fucking coward behind anonymous glasses.

How about, like many of the characters of BNHA, you get character development and start acting like a human beings?

I honestly feel nothing but sorry for you people who do this. If you're going through something, that is entirely not something to joke about at all. But that doesn't mean you turn around and do it to someone else. If you hate character, that's fine. Make a whole blog about it! Create your own safe space. Let out whatever you're feeling onto your own blog.

However, all that negativity? Cease it. Take it, ball it up and set it on fire. Put the ashes in a box and sink down somewhere. If you're going to use the anon option, do it right. Harassing everybody is just further proving how miserable you are and how toxic fandoms are.

[sapphos-darlings]

I'm dating this girl who is VERY femme. She's bi, I'm her first female partner, she's previously had very heteronormative relationships and grew up in a very patriarchal culture/family. Now, she has these really strict "rules" for herself that she just seems to torture herself with. She'll apologize excessively if she hasn't shaved some part of her body, complains about her weight even though she's arguably borderline underweight, will barely let ME see her without makeup etc. etc. (1/2)

She’s constantly body monitoring, adjusting her position, sucking her stomach in, “fixing” things, making negative/anxious comments about her own appearance and so on. For some reason, she doesn’t apply any of these “rules” to me. I’m also femme(ish) but don’t bother with a lot of expectations like shaving, makeup and stuff. I want to help, or make life easier for her somehow but I don’t know how and witnessing this daily just makes me really sad. For her, and women in general. Advice?

Hello there, Anon.

I know exactly what you’re talking about. I remember when things like that started to manifest in middle-school, and even though I’m pushing thirty I still know women like this. Patriarchy will do this to a woman.

I’ve known women who diet obsessively, outright perform in front of men, who are nearing the definition of an eating disorder, and really struggle with self-esteem, and I’ve had some of these experiences too.

And the thing is, even though you are looking at it from the outside and draw these really clear lines between patriarchal beauty standards and her behaviour, it doesn’t mean she sees it like that. People in general hate to be read and told that they do something because of some external pressure and not their own choice, as teenage me discovered when I started to go on feminist rants, and it’s probably not the best idea to bullheadedly confront these very delicate, deeply personal things about someone, especially when they are a source of pain. The thing is, people guard and shield personal parts about themselves, even or maybe especially those that cause us pain.

The fact that she applies these rules of hers on her and not you further tells you that she does them because it’s what she’s been taught and what she’s learned and now feels she must do. It’s good that she doesn’t enforce them on you, and might be a sign that deep down knows that they are irrational, unnecessary or downright bad for her too. Only she knows for sure, though.

So my advice to you is this: It’s not your job to save others from themselves. It is not your job to decide what parts of others are bad and need to be done away with, and how. What you can do is be supportive, honest and kind, and through your own actions build a relationship where you can both thrive.

What you can do is understand, support and accept her. Express the kind of person you are: you don’t judge her, you value her, you support her, you want to know what she feels, thinks and has experienced. Express your thoughts and worldview about women and beauty and everything else honestly without targetting her. Focus on positive things and positive expressions; talk about best case scenariors instead of listing everything that’s wrong.

When approaching things like body image and performing femininity, be sensitive about it. Set the tone as calm, accepting and open. Ask her questions and focus on her happiness and comfort, and then listen to her. For example, if she’s complaining about her weight when you go out to eat, don’t get sucked in to correcting her feelings about herself or tell her what she should be thinking, but ask what she’d like to eat, what is it that she enjoys, what is her favorite. Create a space where she is allowed to be anxious but don’t feed into that, and where you want to spend good time with her as she is. Focus on enjoyment and positive things that you want to share, and she will make her own choices within that space.

Tell her how you feel about her, not how she should feel about herself. If she’s ashamed of not having shaved her legs, tell her that it’s all the same to you, that you think she’s amazing as she is, that you didn’t shave and you feel good about that. Don’t accept her apology, because she has nothing to apologize for.

If she’s worried she doesn’t look “properly feminine”, tell her it’s no one’s business to judge her and that you’ll be with her either way.

Be honest about your own feelings and how you feel. Just because you shouldn’t educate or correct her constantly doesn’t mean you don’t get to feel sad, and that is a valid feeling to communicate to your girlfriend. I sure know that back in high-school when my close friend who was very slender and athletic moaned how horrible she looked and how “fat” she was, it made me, about 15 kilograms heavier than her, feel miserable. Of course, she had her own troubles and she didn’t mean any harm to me, but it still hurt.

Basically, use “I”-sentences; “I feel like --”, “I think that --”, and so on. Sentences that communicate what you feel, what you think and why, and what you hope and wish and worry about.

The general gist is that people evolve, grow and heal because they choose to, in the environment that they have. You can be a positive, accepting force in her life, someone who accepts her, listens to her and talks things through with her, someone who allows her to feel good and accepted so that she can in turn value herself more and build her self-esteem. You can give her the space and positive energy, but she has to do the growing herself, and that and the direction it goes is her choice. Basically watch out for too specific expectations: her personal growth doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll stop shaving or wearing makeup, for example.

And finally, remember that taking care of someone else’s problem is not your responsibility. I don’t know her or her situation, but in case she has actual medical issues such as anxiety or an eating disorder, it’s not on you to be her sole comfort or replace a professional. Just remember that professonal resources are an option if that’s needed.

There’s my general advice. I wish you luck and happiness with your girl. Mod Sade might want to add something later, so keep an eye on reblogs.

- Lavender