#and i know edwin felt bad but oh my god

[avatar-aaang]

Monty was so so strong for not just immediately walking into traffic after that

[kaely1916]

Go Get your Man! 🏃🏽‍➡️ pt1

Context: After everything that happened, Charles might be a little too overprotective with Edwin. After all, he almost lost his best friend for the third time in a week, so he had his reasons for deciding to secretly check on Edwin during one of his cartoon nights with Niko. What he didn’t expect to find was Niko helping Edwin get ready for a date.

“Charles, you’re going to make me dizzy if you keep pacing around my room like that.”

“It’s just... God, do you think I should go check on him? Just in case?”

“For heaven's sake, Charles, he’s only been gone for an hour and he’s with Niko. He’s fine.🙄”

“I know, I know... BUT what if something happened??? I can’t help but be all nervous when Edwin is out of my sight, Crystal. I’m worried.😩”

“You’re codependent, that’s what you are. Everything is fine. Besides, Edwin won’t be happy if you interrupt his night with Niko because you’re having an anxiety attack.🥱”

“First, I’m not having an attack. Second, he won’t know I was there if I don’t say anything.”

“This is going to blow up in your face, remember my words.”

“Sure, sure. Whatever you say. See you later.”

*Crystal tried to convince him again that it was a bad idea, but Charles was already passing the mirror.*

“Such an idiot.😮‍💨”

*On the other side, Charles traveled to Niko’s bathroom mirror, peeking through the door to see if Edwin was okay. He just needed to hear Edwin’s voice to know everything was alright and that he could come back, but the other’s words made him curious and he couldn’t help but see what was going on.*

“Niko, I look ridiculous.”

Edwin stood in the middle of the room, his usual Edwardian clothes completely replaced by tight black jeans and a blue turtleneck sweater, which was just... wow.

“You look incredible. That’s what you look! I knew that turtleneck would be perfect for you.”

(Oh, maybe he went to some clothes store with Niko. That’s cute. And judging by Edwin’s current outfit... damn, Niko was doing an amazing job.😳)

“When I asked you to help choose clothes, I didn’t expect such a radical change.”

“Foolishness. You, my friend, should know that I don’t do things halfway. Besides, this is your first date with that boy; you need to look gorgeous to wow him.”

(Okay... WHAT?😨) Charles almost tripped over himself if he hadn’t remembered to be incorporeal for a moment. (A date??? Edwin??? With who??🤨)

“It’s... it’s not an actual date, I think.”

(Oh, thank God.😌)

“Oh, come on. Meeting a guy to go for a walk together and visit some museums is definitely a date, Edwin!”

(Oh, fuck😔)

“Well... you might be right, but I don’t want to make a big fuss about this. This is still very new to me, you see.”

“Don’t worry. Everything will be great. Not every day a cute French ghost asks you out on a date! Relax and enjoy yourself. You deserve it. Have some fun with the French boy~~”

*Saying that Charles was speechless would be an understatement. His best mate was apparently going on a date with an apparently cute French ghost while he thought he was watching Scooby-Doo with Niko. Oh, the betrayal. He wished that was the only thing he felt, but no...*

“His name is Marcus and we are going to have fun, just not in the way your mind is suggesting.”

“You never know, my friend, you never know... Anyway, he’s close to being here, right?”

“Yes. Once again, I apologize for asking him to use your mirror, but I didn’t want him to go to the agency. That wouldn’t be professional.”

“And once again, I thank you for doing it. I’m dying to meet him!!! 🤩”

(Fuck. Now that guy was actually coming here to take Edwin out? To take Edwin away from him?? Hell no 😫) But before Charles could think about what to do, the mirror in Niko’s bathroom revealed a person.

“Good evening. May I enter?”

(He’s a freaking vampire or what?😒) The ghost looked more or less around their age, with black wavy hair and blue eyes, dressed in modern clothes and a red tie.

“Oh yes!! So nice to finally meet you. I’m Niko, Edwin is my best friend.”

“A pleasure. I’m Marcus. Edwin has told me a lot about you... Good to see you again, Edwin, you look very nice.”

“... T-thank you, you as well. I think we should be going. I don’t want to interfere with Niko’s sleep any more than I already have.”

“You guys don’t have to worry about me. In fact, do you want me to go with you?👀”

“We don’t need a chaperone, Niko. Thank you.”

“Fine, but you’ll have to tell me everything. With details! I expect to hear from you in the morning... unless you two are too busy tonight~~😏”

“GOODBYE, NIKO.💀”

*Edwin said, very embarrassed, while leaving with the other ghost through the mirror, his arm interlaced with Marcus’s. Charles was actually furious about all the advantages that guy was taking with Edwin.*

“You can stop hiding now, Charles.”

“You... you knew I was here?”

“I have very good observational skills, as does Edwin. You were really lucky he was all nervous about his date, or he would have found you too.”

“I... I was just...”

“Spying on Edwin’s first date?”

“No... I didn’t even know he had a date...”

“Oh, well, after what happened between you two, it’s normal that he didn’t know how to tell you.”

“You know??? Did Edwin tell you?”

“Well, he told me he had confessed to his friend but was rejected, and now they decided to just be friends. I just added two and two🤓.”

“I did not reject him!!! I... well, yes, we’re still friends... but I didn’t reject him! I never will! I told him that we have forever to figure out the rest...”

“Charles... are you in love with Edwin?”

“I... I don’t know.😟”

“Look, you’re my friend too and I love you, but you really need to figure this out sooner if you don’t want someone else to steal Edwin from you. Because he’s not going to wait for you forever... well, knowing Edwin, he probably would, but he doesn’t deserve that.”

“No, he doesn’t...”

“I think that for the first time in his life, he’s truly comfortable with himself, and because he thinks you rejected him, he’s starting to allow himself to date other people and experiment with what he really likes.”

“I... I know that... but... I’m just so scared of messing everything up... of not being good enough for him... of... losing him... I just... God, Niko, what if..😰.”

*Charles stumbled over his own words, fighting back tears.*

“Okay, so we’re doing this.😤”

“Doing what?🥺”

“Don’t worry, I’ve seen a lot of psychological animes.🤓☝🏻”

*And just like that, Niko guided him to lie on her bed while she sat in a chair beside him, with a little notebook and a pen in her hand, and a pair of glasses that God only knew where they came from.*

“Niko...😐”

“Shhh, everything is okay. This is a safe place. Now tell me in detail, where do you think these thoughts came from?🧐”

“Well...😔”

*After about two hours of therapy, Niko realized she would need more sessions, but at least she managed to get Charles to reach a conclusion.*

“Oh, fuck😦.”

“Yeah.🙂‍↕️”

“I’m such an idiot.😣”

“Yep.🙂‍↕️”

“I’m in love with Edwin too... God, I’m so in love with him. How did I not see it before?”😫

“Love makes us blind, Charles. Don’t worry. You’re not the first.”

“But... I’m too late. Nothing matters now... because Edwin is going with that French guy... he’ll probably forget about me...”

“Okay, Charles, I don’t know if you’re an idiot or just a disaster in love matters, but you’re crazy if you think Edwin has moved on from you.”

“What do you mean?🤨”

“1. Someone doesn’t forget a 30-year-old crush just like that. And 2. You don’t know how much I had to insist that Edwin accept the other offer.”

“Wait, what??? So you basically forced him to go on a date with a stranger he didn’t want to go with??😠”

“I may or may not have told him that seeing someone would help him forget his feelings for... well, you.😬”

“NIKO!!!👹”

“What??? It was before I knew you hadn’t rejected him, just that you were an idiot who loved him back but had too many problems to realize it🙄.”

“OMG, what am I going to do now?😫”

“Isn’t it clear? I know the direction of the museum where Edwin is going.😎”

“You don’t mean..😯.”

“Go get your man!🫡”

*Without wasting another minute, Charles quickly traveled to the mirror, hoping he wasn’t too late. Just wait a little longer for him, Edwin. He would definitely get things right this time.*

---

To be continued...

[skayafair]

Just watched some MVs and OH MY GODS Crystal is SO fucking cool.

In the beginning I thought she was crazy cool, but by the end of ep 1 that changed to "endearing" because she showed her vulnerable side - just a lost girl. Like. Somebody take care of her ASAP, with blankets and hot meals and lots and lots of kindness because this girl's been sucking it up all on her own for too long, she needs a break.

Now the endearing part has settled in and I'm back to the crazy cool because SHE IS. I admire everything about her post-amnesia personality (and have some compassion for the previous one).

Also I've seen some people saying Kassius' acting was bad or bland. I've considered it. Rewatched some clips. You know what, I'm falling more and more in love with the character and her portrayal.

Crystal may seem more "bland" compared to other characters because Edwin and Niko have very pronounced designs and I'm not only talking about the looks here, it's about the mannerisms and the lines delivery as well. They are pretty dramatic. Charles is sort of theatrical too, in a way. Basically all the characters look and act like they came straight from the comics, and I don't mean the DBD comics specifically but more in terms of how encapsulated and distinct comic characters images are usually in general.

Crystal though is the viewpoint chatacter. Despite being the psychic, driving the whole plot and having several plotlines she seems the most "normal" among them, the one we're supposed to associate with and see the events through, more or less. Her behavior is less dramatic and theatrical, more casual - I probably have low chances of coming across someone like Edwin or Jenny in real life, but I wouldn't be surprised to meet someone like Crystal. Not saying Kassius acting isn't expressive - it is, very much so, but it's still toned down compared to the others. I'm convinced it's intentional though.

And another possible reason is that Crystal is often angry or unhappy during the episodes, so to some it may seem like her whole character is limited to a few defining points, which affects the acting, too. Except it's NOT.

While rewatching I was blown by how alive and visceral Crystal felt. All the emotions were delivered the way I'd expect from an irl girl. The post was initially caused by the scene when Charles talks about their relationship and "being professional" to Niko and Edwin while Crystal is present and Kassius showed her character's discomfort SO masterfully. It's the microexpressions, it's the gesture of covering her face with her hands and the way it's done, it's her quiet remarks and intonation. Or the scene in ep 5 when Crystal tells Charles about David while sitting on the pavement in front of the butcher's shop and something in me breaks every time I see this scene because Crystal is breaking there, too. There are too many examples, basically all of her screen time. Yes I'm a fan of Crystal's why asking

So yeah. I don't like to deny other's points of view just because I don't like them, and Kassius' acting wasn't something I thought of while watching, so I took time to actually think about it. Hence why I have a full right to say: this opinion is a total bullshit 💖

And I didn't think of her acting while watching because it felt so natural that I DIDN'T have to think of it. Which tells a lot as is, I think.

So yeah. Stan Crystal everyone, she's a gem.

[someonexsomeone]

Okay thought about it and!! I think I really liked Dead Boy Detectives!! I think there are good things and bad things, so here are my (spoilers) Thoughts:

Positives!!

- casting was amazing!! I thought everyone did an excellent job, and while I don’t personally love all the actors, I think they played their roles excellently (faves: Esther, Cat King, Niko <333, Jenny, Tragic Mick)

- each character felt unique, even the minor ones

- the beginning was a little rough but once the plot started going it kept my interest peaked without feeling overwhelming

- Charles and Edwin’s relationship was wow so heartbreaking but oh my hod the way they met the staircase scene the way Charles foiled Edwin’s grumpiness yes yes yes

- NIKO AND EDWIN MY BELOVES

- Niko making things right with her unconditional kindness. I hate when shows have the main characters kinda lack social awareness and manners in order to push the plot along faster because it makes them seem like bad people when they aren’t. Niko giving a voice to characters who are otherwise pushed aside by the others (the sprites, Tragic Nick, Jenny, and even the Lighthouse Gift Shop owner) makes her that much more endearing :((

- I love Tragic Mick and his story and the store. What a compelling side character??

- the setting was oh my god so perfectly moody

- the Cat King forcing the characters to stay in one place when they notoriously can fast travel was so perfect to raise the stakes without making it feel forced

- I lowkey love they made Crystal a bad person because the way she was introduced made it seem like she was gonna be this perfect average joe (also what happened to that little girl ghost that originally started this all???)

Negatives :((

- okay so minor but wow I did not like the blurred edges in the show. I think it worked a lot of times to give everything that sort of dreamy look, but most times it made it hard to focus and distracting from the scene

- sometimes the writing and pacing felt…off. Like the fact that some of the opening dialogue was such Wattpad esk “hey best friend remember how we’ve been friends for 30 years? I’m the goofball to your serious branic haha brills!” And then were immediately given Edwin’s backstory with no context?? Like yes good I’m glad I know it now but it took like 5 episodes to learn Charles’? Also, the fact that we only learn Charles is abused like 10 mins before he has a breakdown with no indication earlier is crazy to me?? We even get a scene where he talks about his parents, and there was no foreshadowing to his dislike of his father??

- speaking of pacing; sometimes it felt very mechanical. Get case, case is actually something more, oh no it’s Esther, easy peasy defeat Esther she’s def done for this time, case closed, oh no she’s alive!, repeat. She just wouldn’t stay down and I love her for that lmao

- I’m trying to find solace in the fact that EVERY relationship in that show got fucked up/was fucked up but honestly the fact that anytime we were really close to having a gay relationship that was then brutally ripped away was crazy and sometimes unnecessarily brutal. I mean — Jenny finally taking a chance and opening up only for her secret admirer turning out to be a stalker and a killer?? Monty getting rejected then ripped to pieces?? The Cat King admitting he likes Edwin more than a toy and being beaten to death?? Also the bait and switch with Niko’s sprites and lowkey highkey making it seem like Crystal was in love lmao

- the way they portrayed Despair was honestly such a shameful choice for me. I would understand if they were going for a modern version to smth, but they were literally in Hell where they crafted a monster out of babydoll parts. You’re telling me Despair, creeping sadness that consumes your soul, with countless reasons and outcomes from it, and countless manefestations, was given a shlumpy cardigan??? Was given no real care beyond a human actor with minimal make up?? We literally MEET one of the, practically, Gods of Hell and that’s the best we came up with?!

- getting out of hell was surprisingly SO EASY like I think it needed /something/ else because at no point did I think they wouldn’t make it out

- DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON FUCKING SIMON?? No way in FUCK did they try to redeem to me a character who bullied Edwin to the point of sacrifing him to a demon (doesn’t matter if he didn’t think anything was going to happen, his intentions were still malicious) by giving him the biggest cop out “but I was secretly in love with you the whole time” BULL SHIT and then the fact that he got to ascend to heaven after???? ALSO THE FACT THAT EDWIN HAD TO BE CHASED BY A DOLL MONSTER AND RIPPED APART WHEN SIMON ONLY GOT PAPERCUTS ARE YOU KIDDING ME???

- WHY TF DID THEY KILL MY GIRL NIKO (I know implied she’s alive somewhat at the end but still). Also, you’re telling me they didn’t even wait until they saw Niko’s ghost and just assumed she moved on that fast without saying goodbye?? Ridiculous??

TLDR: despite some of its shortcomings, I am super excited to see what they do with Season 2, and I hope we get a more expanded universe and cast of characters!!

[cannibalistic-vampirefag]

thanks for the tag @us-costco-official :3

Name — Ed (unsure of whether it comes from Edwin or Edgar) but I also have been considering Alec/Alex (from Alexander. for narrative reasons, you see). Have gone by Bread in the past

Pronouns — he/they mostly, but wouldn't say no to 'it' or neopronouns

Favourite animal — Ferrets are the animals ever, but bats are up there too

Last Tv show — Winx Club, because I felt nostalgic, and Hannibal. (God somebody should make fanart of them with the "I think we're gonna have to kill this guy, musa" "damn")

Least favourite fruit — pears 🤢 also avocados. they taste of nothing AND they have awful texture? fuck no

Last name — whatever max from black sails has going on

Last videogame — not a videogame person but it was a zombie-killing one my friend had. I sucked ass.

Credit card details — I don't believe in money

How many stuffed animals? — here only two (Bugsy and Tito), at home at least 30

Do you own a flag? — I only stand for one flag and one flag only 🦅🇺🇲🦅🇺🇲🇺🇲🦅🦅🇺🇲🇺🇲🦅 (iron maiden flag on my door)

ethnicity — white but with that spicy bit of Mediterranean that will make americans call Italians non-white name your

address — your nearest punk venue

would you rather die peacefully in the opposite gender or die painfully (physically/mentally) but in your preferred gender? — die painfully because it's sexier

are you stronger than average — not in the slightest

do you own any firearms or weapons? — I carry a pocket knife on me at all times. at home I have a smallsword (decoration) and two daggers + various blades :3

have you drunken alcohol? — yes and I miss it so bad (can't drink it here). vodka where are you my girl 😫😫😫

would you say you have many friends — I have some, but not a lot. they would def look for me if I were to disappear tho

are you in a relationship? — I'M FUCKING TRYING TO

at what times is no-one at your house? — never. the eye is always watching and the ghost of the girl i used to be is always haunting the hallways.

do you have a spare key outside your home? — yea it's up my ass

how close is the nearest bus stop to your house? — oh honey. there aren't any bus stops in a 20km area

what are your favourite passwords? — pissword

tagging some mutuals because I always wanna know more about everyone ever @codeoth @gay4way @dandelions-arent-weeds @bitchboy @bloodyboybreakdowns @mychemvampires @batjpeg

[baldpeoplehater]

ok so its 2 am. i am tired, i am incoherent and i have a lot to say.

first of all, before the final 10ish minutes i was actually pretty ok with the ending! i was so happy to see that most of the stories were wrapped up really nicely and were headed for a good place. but as soon as ted boarded that airplane. oh god.

although i never really shipped tedbecca before season 3, to me it kinda of seemed like they were ending up together? and i wasn’t mad about it. i actually got pretty invested in it after the whole matchbox/soldier thing. and it really sucks that they build all that up for nothing! all the signs with the psychic (“oh but they could have been for the dutch guy” yes! why not just leave them for scenes with him then?), the multiple ted/rebecca fakeouts (the whole bantr thing and the beginning of the finale episode), the AIRPORT SCENE? SERIOUSLY? and the worst part about it is that by building all this up but not having them end up together, rebecca’s ending felt unfinished and rushed (we barely got to know the guy and even though is “meant to be” or whatever they interacted once. come on), and (for me personally) it seemed that the show implied ted going back to michelle, which makes no sense at all. there was no need for tedbecca to be endgame, but both of their characters deserved better.

the whole roy/keeley/jamie debacle. (i think i just get throuple baited by ted lasso) seriously, i’m ALL for keeley ending up alone since she’s been in relationships basically the whole show. but why make her go back to roy when he apologized????? if they made up, as friends, there wouldn’t be A SINGLE storyline that would have to be changed. they still could’ve gone after jamie. the fight between jamie and roy could still be a catalyst for her to realize that she doesn’t want to be with either of them for now. it was completely unnecessary for them to sleep together.

why. on. earth. would you, for three entire seasons, disapprove of a relationship, show us how toxic it is, and then have them marry each other. seriously. of all the couples, beard and jane ended up together? dude. come on.

ok. let’s ignore the whole beard and jane thing being toxic and just assume they’re good now and she’s improved (her shredding his passport so he couldn’t leave was barely a figment of my imagination). although i dislike ted and beard being apart, i do understand that people move on and even the closest of friends sometimes have to grow apart. but why couldn’t they show us ted at beard’s wedding? he clearly was ok with beard staying for jane. there was no bad blood and even with him going back to kansas, i really doubt he would miss his best friend’s wedding.

and finally, i hate that ted went back to kansas. i can’t really logic myself out of this one, like i did with my other complaints because the reason why he went is really simple: for his son. and it’s the right thing to do. must be really hard parenting from another country and i’m absolutely sure that henry missed him a lot. but michelle could’ve gone to london with him, specially after it being implied that dr. jacob was out of the picture. it just makes me really sad that ted had to go back while everyone else moved forward.

ok! now the positive points because im not a complete bitch.

love to see rupert get absolutely shitted on. the wanker scene? poetic cinema.

i’m really happy that rebecca didn’t sell the club and that she realized that, although it wasn’t what she imagined would happen at first, they were her family now. also loved the juxtaposition of her giving 49% of shares to the fans against edwin akufo’s idea of a super league or whatever the fuck

COLIN GOT TO KISS HIS FELLA. THATS ALL I WANTED I LITERALLY CRIED

the ted/nate scenes really moved me. even though nate’s arc was kinda rushed, i was still happy to see him thriving at the end and going back to being the sympathetic character he was at the beginning of the show. him saying i’m sorry, crying on ted’s shoulder, coming back as assistant kitman instead of coach, it all showed that he changed. i’m also really glad that richmond won with his false nine after all.

MY BABY SAM GOT TO BE IN NIGERIAS TEAM IM SO EXCITED FOR HIM I DONT EVEN CARE IF IT DOESNT MAKE SENSE JUST LET HIM PLAY OK

the goodbye song from the boys and their reaction when ted says he liked it. priceless. (bonus points for trent joining in)

trent’s book being successful

willis

anyways. it was a hell of a ride. i don’t think we’re getting a season 4, but if we do i’ll be back on my bullshit. believe guys :)

[theyanderespecialist]

Teasing Abel (One Shot) SCP 076 Abel X Mark OC

(mark's pov)

I walk down the halls smiling at others as I rush to a room, opening the door to see Abel there, lifting weights over his head, the same, familiar, pissed off look on his face as I smile and walk in front of him.

"Mark." "Hey Able. Looks heavy." "Not really." He said not really paying too.much attention as I unbutton my coat.

"I got a new outfit you know." "That's nice." "It is..I got a lot of compliments on my body, how it's "perfect for children." I don't think they even know I'm a boy." I said as this caused him to look up as I posted in the outfit. It was actually my old yoga pants that I haven't worn in..god I think 7 years, and a sheer like sports bra.

He looked at me and the weight drop and it dented the floor. I wince. I smirked as I decided to tease him a bit, he did not pay enough attention to me even when I bought that lacy nightie. I think he needs to know it.

"I mean, there was this one man..Edwin I think, he said I looked good enough to eat, I just teased back and said "hit me up" I mean..it actually excited me.

(Mark in the starting phases of being an exobitionist

(When in this state you can find them revealing more skin and being a tease~)

Next thing I know I am grabbed and pinned to the wall being kissed roughly.

I let out a soft groan as I look to see Abel. "Aww you think I'm actually going to run off with them~?"

"I don't want people looking at you like your theirs."

"Oh you don't?~ too bad. I think maybe I should be the man in the relationship for a little bit~." I tease. (Oh no you don't threaten his dominance mark)

(XD You never threaten Abel Dominance XD It leads to bad stuff XD)

Abel growled and pinned me down in downward dog then put the weight on me so I could not get up from it. my ass perfect crotch level.

I let out a shocked and confused noise as I tried to struggle to get out, my ass wiggling side to side due to the struggling. That is when I heard a tear a felt air drift into my pants he just tore a hole in the back side of my yoga pants!

"Abel!" I cried out only to moan when a Wet finger was shoved in.

I moaned as my body shuddered feeling the invasion. It had been months, and I wanted this time to be the true first time for anything more than fingers.

"This time I will take you and you will never forget that you are mine." He says and starts to finger my ass preparing me.

I let out a shocked and aroused moan. "A-All I said was I should be the man on the relationship." I teased

"No you are my sissy slut and that means I am the man!" He orders and bites my ass cheek and prepares me fast and hard. "You are mine and I am not loosing you to anyone. Not even what you think it should be."

I let out a moan. I actually had no desire to play a 'male' role. We both believe in each party having equal rights, but, he could get like this from time to time..and I liked it, because, well, he wouldn't do it unless I wanted him to. I feel him pull out of me as I let out a soft whimper but wait to feel him inside of me...but I didn't.

I hear him spit and start to lube up his cock. Oh yes finally. He said he wanted to wait not to just jump right into sex. It has been a year since we been together and we only finger my hole and that has not happen in three months. He seemed worried he would hurt me. So he always stopped before going to far.

Bit it seemed like he just didn't care anymore..and that aroused me~

I wait to feel himself inside of me..bit I didn't as I cried out as he hit my ass

He spanked my ass with his dick and smeared his pre cum all over it. "You have to beg for it~ Prove to me you only want my cock in you."

I shudder at that. I still wanted some control of the situation (you're not gonna get it. XD) as I rub my ass against his dick.

"O-Oh come on..d-don't make me do that. Just let me go~" I said, playing as though this wasn't a moment I had dreamed of for an entire year

He left and I was confused then I felt him put something on my cock it was a vibrating cock ring. I groaned as he turns it on and I knew I would not be able to cum. And he now has full control over the situation even more than before.

(XD This is what you get XD You should have begged XD)

I gripped the ground beneath me.

"N-No--"

"I'll say it again. Beg for it." He said as I let out a whimper as my cock became fully hard.

"P-Please. .please put it in.." I mutter.

"Not good enough."

I take a deep breath. "Please Abel! Please! Fuck my Sissy hole, I only ever wanted your cock filling me to the brim and making me break in ectasy!" I cry out blushing hotly.

He smirks and then thrusts in hitting my prostate right away and I moaned in ectasy. He ripped off the cock ring and I came around him from just one thrust~

I moan thought I was still unable to move from my position under the weight and under him. I grip the floor, my nails digging into it as his hand grabbed at my hair roughly making me moan.

(Oh he's into rough rough sex)

(Mmmmmmhmmmmm)

"That is right!" He says pulling on it to turn my head and he leaned over biting my neck. "Only I can make you cum! You are Mine!"

I moaned. "Y-Yes.. I-I'm yours~!" I said.

"That's right, you are, you're my girl, no one else can have you." He said right in my ear as I shudder.

"I-I'm your..." I let out a moan before giving a small smirk. "I'm your boy~" I teased as he glared before he smirked.

"You're trying to get me worked up on purpose, aren't you?"

"How else was I supposed to get you to make love to me~" I moan. "It has been a year Abel, a boy or girl or whatever I will be for you, I have needs~"

"aren't I fucking you right now? Is that not enough? Or perhaps.. you want something more than just being fucked..perhaps..you want to be shown your place~?" He asked as I shudder, tightening around him though I tried not to give it away.

"Oh so I am right~" He says. "I gave you to much freedom, do I have to lock you in the bedroom and dress you like my good girl feeding you nothing but my spunk for you to know you are mine~"

I once more shuddered as I moaned. "N-No..I-I don't want that..~" I said, a part of me wanting it, the other part wanting to pretend I wasn't as depraved as I really am.

I shudder when he moaned right in my ear. "I-It..if I was.. hypothetically i-into it..d-describe what you'd do to me.." I moan and pant out. "I-I'n detail"

(Yes describe in great detail~ but marks not into it obviously;3)

(X3)

"Oh first I would make you cum sensless, so much that you black out. Then I would take you to our bedroom and chaine your ankle to the bed, for the first few months you would have to earn my trust to even leave the bed~ You would earn your meals by making me cum just with your mouth~ If you could not do it you would not eat~ Then you would have to beg me to let you try again for the taste of your spunk only diet~ I would have more than enough for you to eat as much as you want~"

(I think mark need actual food and water abel xD)

(XD)

I moaned as that, the thought of being under his full control..I could feel blood starting to rush once more down to my dick.

"Of course, once you get that you're only mine, and I can trust you, you'll graduate to being able to leave the bed, you'll get some nice outfits too as a reward." I let out a moan. "I-I think just having my mouth fucked se-seems like such a waste.." I moaned.

(I mean yeah able what about poor marks ass)

(XD YEAH!!!)

"Oh I will defiantly fuck your ass at least three times a day, do you know how much I jerk off a day?" He teased me I honestly did not know.

"i-I-I don't.." I don't think I've ever seen him or even hear him or others talk about him jerking off.

"Eight times a day and that is with me working out~" He says. "And my cum does not become anywhere near watery even by the eight time~"

I blushed as I tried to speak before he grabbed me digging his nails into my waist as I moan as I feel him starting to twitch

"See what you just thinking about it does to me~" He says. "I am going to fill you to the brim~"

I moaned as I finally managed to arch my back into him as he ended up cumming inside.

He came deep and true to his word he filled me to the brim as when he pulled out I was leaking cum. He then stuffed something in me and I moaned.

"A nice butt plug don't want you spilling just yet~" He purred.

I let out a confused moan. "J-just yet?"

"No I want you to feel good a bloated to remember who you belong to~"

My eyes widen. I was starting to regret teasing him..

[lovelyirony]

strawberries & cigarettes by troye whatshisface but it's winteriron (idk if this is a prompt or just a statement you can take it as either)

Bucky doesn’t like the fact that he’s going to a stupid fucking private school. He doesn’t like that this is his mother’s sacrifice, that she stays up late with the bills and works another job so that he can go there and make a living. 

He doesn’t even know what he wants to do in life, that’s the thing. Mom thinks that he’s going to be a really good businessman and she doesn’t know that he smokes outside his window and sometimes just doesn’t retain any sort of information at school because he has to be good. 

“I sacrifice so much for you,” she tells him one night. “You need to make a good living for yourself. Promise me.” 

And he does. Hell if he knows how he’s going to keep it, but that’s the promise. 

- 

The one kid that he absolutely hates at school is Tony Stark. Born with a silver spoon in his mouth and a whole silverware drawer at the ready in case he doesn’t like the spoon. 

Tony’s kind of wealth is the kind that is so astronomically high that at some point you have to wonder what it means to him. Because it doesn’t seem to mean anything. 

He shows up in the shittiest sneakers he’s ever seen, held together with tape and drawn on by someone else. His hair is never styled, his uniform is never washed, and yet he just exudes that kind of confidence that comes with knowing that your life is better than anyone else’s, kind of. 

He’s also an ass in class. Correcting teachers, derailing the topic, and acting like it all is beneath him. 

They say he’s a genius, going to take over his father’s company. He has his future set in stone, and so there’s nothing else for him to learn. Bucky’s not really sure if he’s a genius or not, because he’s pretty sure a genius could figure out when to leave shit alone. 

Everyone at St. Anthony’s knows that Bucky is an individual who does well on his own. At most, you say hello and move on. He doesn’t talk to anyone, he makes sure he doesn’t look like he talks to anyone, and he’s said multiple times that he doesn’t want to talk to anyone. 

Tony Stark, however, talks. Doesn’t matter what the subject is, he talks. 

Bucky gets nicknames. Because of his...frigid demeanor, this means that Tony calls him shit like “Ice Pop,” “Icicle,” “Mr. Freeze,” and any other nickname that’s applicable to cold. 

“Hey Snowball,” Tony says in class. “You finished with your presentation for English class? Mine still sucks, although I’m sure it’ll be better than Hammer’s.” 

“That’s not saying a lot,” Bucky mutters. “At all. Now shut up. It’s class.” 

“We all know it’s going to be boring,” Tony says. “Sitwell has the personality of a tumbleweed, and you’re so much more interesting to talk to.” 

Bucky doesn’t respond to that. 

“Ah, so we’re at the no-talking stage, darling. I’ll make it up to you. Ice cream? Dinner? Elaborate cruise trip in summer?” 

Bucky rolls his eyes, and Tony quiets for roll call, but says one last comment. 

“I think I’m going to do the presentation in Comic Sans. Thoughts?” 

“I wish you didn’t have thoughts, then maybe you’d leave me alone.” 

Tony laughs. 

“You’re cute, Barnes. Cute. You know I don’t leave anyone alone.” 

- 

There’s a bad day. Bucky gets those sometimes. Every day of his life is a bad day, almost, but this one? The absolute worst. 

He had nightmares, barely got any sleep, and found out that his little sister used up the last of his shampoo, so he had to use his mom’s and now he smells like “Strawberry Paradise.” 

He hates the day, and it’s not even eight o’clock yet. 

Tony Stark, of course, makes it worse. He talks incessantly about something related to robotics or the weather or music or whatever, and Bucky just sees red. 

"Can you shut up for one fucking second of your life?” he hisses at him. “Oh my fucking god, it doesn’t matter. Nothing you say matters at all to me.” 

- 

Tony’s heard a lot of shit like that. Like, a lot. Probably worse. 

But for some reason, it’s hurting more coming from Bucky Barnes. 

Tony doesn’t shut up. He knows that. Everyone knows that. He has legitimately given people headaches. His dad has timed his talking and limited him to about two minutes. It would’ve been even less, but at family therapy they’re trying to work on “empathy for others.” 

(A crock of bullshit, because Tony’s fairly sure his dad doesn’t know what that is.) 

Bucky’s...he’s different. Sure, he hates Tony. Everyone does, and to be completely frank, Tony likes it that way. You know where you stand, how you can be interpreted if people only feel one thing about you. 

But Bucky is perhaps the only interesting person Tony knows at this hellhole of a school. He works really hard on his assignments, has more to work on than other kids. He looks frustrated at math equations, but stays and pores over textbooks after school. 

He brings a peanut butter and jelly sandwich every single day. Tony thinks the last time he had one was at a birthday party when he was twelve, and even then it wasn’t really a sandwich but more of a deconstructed concept thing that probably cost two hundred bucks a plate. 

- 

Now that Tony’s ruminating on it, it’s probably because no one has exactly told him that what he says doesn’t matter. They just say they don’t wanna hear about it. The two concepts are honestly very different. Tony has a sneaking suspicion that he is going to go into a tailspin about this on a Thursday night at two in the morning. 

Ha. On a Thursday night at two in the morning. What odd phrasing that is, why is that so weird? It’s night, but it’s morning and you’re supposed to be asleep but morning is a wake-up time, so--

Oh, there’s the meaning. 

Why would you discuss a night and a morning? Why does it matter? On a Thursday? 

Tony wonders how much shit he’s said that just ultimately doesn’t matter. 

This gets him thinking about how much nothing in his life matters. Don’t get him wrong, he knew it. 

Knew it in the way everyone tells him he’ll be the next Howard Stark. 

Knows it in the way that his own father isn’t exactly all too fond of him and Tony has a problem looking at anything with dear old Captain America because of comparisons that his father makes and honestly he probably almost named Tony “Steve.” 

Could you imagine him having the name of Steve? God, he’d barf. 

- 

For some reason, this is the worst he’s ever felt. Sure his father hates him and his mother could be considered an absentee at best, but what gets him to cry into his pillow and rethink his entire existence is a guy who has eye circles darker than anyone else’s and thinks that wearing any bright color is “branching out into alternative fashion.” 

God, he wishes he had a break. 

Nothing you say matters to me. 

This is the phrase that gets him. Tony is pretty sure it’s because it’s what everyone thinks. 

- 

Ever since then, Tony doesn’t talk to Bucky. Ever. 

And that’s...that’s weird to Bucky. It was routine. Tony annoys him, he snaps a bit, and then it starts all over. 

Tony looks at him, sometimes. As if he’s some sort of impossible problem he can’t figure out. 

When Bucky actually thinks about it, Tony hasn’t really talked to anyone. He’s still himself, which is irritating, but he’s not talking about anything and everything and filling up space. 

It’s...odd. 

He feels a little bit bad because what he said was super shitty and he shouldn’t have said it, but now it’s too late to just kind of awkwardly apologize, and Bucky’s already shit at apologizing anyway. 

- 

Summer arrives with a bang. School is let out ,and in comes the ninety-degree-days that melt your damn head off. Bucky’s apartment doesn’t have AC, so their windows are permanently open and fans are blasting as they swear they’re melting. 

Bucky needs a job. Preferably one with air conditioning. 

He finds one as a driver. Rich people hate taxis, it’s a huge health hazard or whatever they wanna say. He’s not gonna ask. But a nice man named Edwin hands him keys to a damn Cadillac and tells him not to drive too close to the other cars and be careful, because he wasn’t supposed to start the job quite yet, but “something came up.” 

- 

Tony fucking Stark. That’s who he’s fucking driving. 

“Oh my god,” Bucky groans. He sees Tony get into the car. 

“Hey, Jarvis told me I had a new driver, it’s really nice to--oh my fucking god.” 

“Where are you driving to.” 

“Queens.” 

“Queens, seriously?” 

Queens isn’t the type of place for someone like Stark to go to. He’s supposed to say Saks Fifth Avenue or Gucci or wherever the hell rich people go when they’re not vacationing in Europe or elsewhere. Not Queens. Especially not Queens. 

“It doesn’t matter where I’m going so long as you know where to drive,” Tony says. 

“Sheesh. Okay.” 

The rest of the drive is silent. It’s not like Bucky can do small-talk. Jesus, he’d rather take his other arm off than do that. 

And Tony, obviously, is not going to say anything. Not after hearing that stellar set of remarks from school. 

It’s a school. There are kids out front, who practically swarm the vehicle. 

“Should I be concerned?” 

“No, they do this every week. If you drive the car back home, Jarvis will explain more. You were kind of an ‘on the spot’ hire for us.” 

“Got it.” 

- 

Jarvis is a kindly old man who Bucky would trust with his Social Security number. 

He is also extremely loyal to Tony, at least. 

“He helps out with some after-school program at one of the local schools,” Jarvis says, smiling softly. “Has a spot in his heart for the children.” 

“What’s he do?” 

“Oh, helps them with schoolwork. I think he does some improvement type jobs around there, but he won’t let us know. Secretive, that one.” 

Bucky sips his tea and doesn’t say anything about how Tony once told everyone in the class that he was wearing neon yellow boxers and they were the comfiest damn boxers he had. It’s just not pertinent to this conversation. 

“You know him, Mr. Barnes?” 

“Um, yeah. We go to school together. I’ve seen him around.” 

“He’s a good student. Always getting straight A’s. Doesn’t always seem like it, but he listens well. Just has a different method.” 

“That’s for sure.” 

- 

For the next two weeks, it’s silence. Always. Bucky will turn on the radio and that’s it. The only thing that Tony has said is to “please change the channel to literally anything” when Belinda Carlisle’s infamously terrible “Heaven is a Place on Earth” came on. 

And that’s it. Seriously. 

When it is two weeks and four days, Bucky can’t take it anymore. 

“Look. I have this job for at least two more months. I’m talking to you. So tell me what you’re doing today.” 

“Teaching.” 

“Wow, way to be descriptive,” Bucky says sarcastically. 

Tony knows he shouldn’t throw it back in his face. But honestly, truly, this is pissing him off. 

“Oh I’m sorry, does what I say matter to you now? Is that what this is?” 

“Oh come on. That was months ago.” 

"Not the point!” Tony says. “I’m getting out now. Feel free to pick me up or not. I don’t give a fuck. But don’t you pretend for a damn minute that you give a shit about my reaction since you’ve already made your point.” 

The car door is slammed. 

Bucky is in somewhat of a pickle. 

- 

Sam tells him that he’s, quote, “the stupidest motherfucker on the planet.” 

And then hangs up. 

thank you for being such a good friend sam. really appreciate it. 

aw look at the little bitch boy mad because i called him stupid. shut up i’m on a date and don’t care once about you. at all. 

i think what i really like about our friendship is how open and empathetic you are to my feelings 

do you know how unattractive you are? on a scale of one to ten? prussia.  

you can’t count now? 

no i can count i’m just saying you shouldn’t exist. 

god i hate you. i’ll talk to you next month

(Yes, they have a time limit to texts. Once a month. And Bucky used his to try to get advice like an idiot. He should’ve just asked Steve. Steve probably would’ve sent him money for a milkshake.) 

- 

Sharon, upon reading his text, sends him back one message: 

so i read this but i’m not emotionally invested. can u make a playlist and send it to me? 

oh my god. you have got to be kidding me. 

i’m not. i told you that u need to b more creative in life. b spontaneous!!! 

He leaves her on read after that. 

- 

Bucky has to figure out how to apologize. Genuinely. Because nothing’s worse than having an apology made but knowing that the person isn’t really meaning it, they’re only saying it to make people more comfortable. 

(He wonders how many times someone’s apologized to Tony because of this reason.) 

He’s not exactly sure how to go about apologizing. 

But he figures it’s sooner rather than later, so he takes the subway to Manhattan and then gets a bike (that’s not exactly his, but he’s bringing it back) and starts the trek to the mansion. It’s a good and solid thirty minute bike ride. 

- 

Tony is having a rather uncomfortable family birthday dinner. Howard’s, to be specific. He’s not sure why they didn’t just go out, but maybe his father is tired of acting like a happy family in public. God knows Tony is. 

(“What’s your favorite thing about your son?” An interviewer had asked cheerily, blush lipstick stretching widely as she smiled. 

“Well, it’s certainly not his sense of style,” Howard had joked. 

He didn’t know what his favorite thing about his son was. He couldn’t answer the fucking question.) 

Jarvis mentions that “Sir Anthony” has a visitor at the door. 

“Are you serious, kid?” Howard says, hissing. “You told someone to come over? During a family event?” 

"No, of course not,” Tony says hurriedly. He doesn’t have anyone over to the house period. Too much risk, not enough payoff. There was also the fact that the house is basically like a mausoleum because both of his parents would rather be caught dead than spend time in one another’s company anymore. 

“I’ll go...I’ll go check who it is.” 

- 

Bucky. Fucking. Barnes. 

“What are you doing here?” Tony hisses. 

“I came to apologize.” 

“For what?” 

“For telling you that your words don’t matter?” Bucky says, more of a question. “I don’t know what else I would apologize for. Maybe for mean-mugging you. I don’t know.” 

“Why?” Tony asks, tiredly. “Why would you apologize for that?” 

“Because it’s obviously affecting you and also I know I was in the wrong? That’s why people apologize?” Bucky answers. “What I did was shitty. What you say matters, I was just having a shitty day and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. It obviously stuck with you a lot longer than I thought it would. So now I’m apologizing.” 

No one besides Jarvis has ever apologized to Tony. Ever. Not in a genuine way. 

“Did you...did you bike here? You have a bike?” 

“What? No.” 

“You walked here?” Tony asks, incredulous. 

“Of course not, then I’d be arriving, like, an hour later. No, the bike isn’t mine.” 

“Who’s is it?” 

“I don’t know, some hipster’s from Brooklyn.” 

“You stole a bike?” 

“The circumstances weren’t ideal, but I don’t have a car to drive to your freakishly large house,” Bucky said bluntly. 

Tony grins. 

“Well then, Buckster, welcome. Let me give you a ride home.” 

He pokes his head into the dining room, where the plates are already being cleared. 

“Hey, I gotta give my friend a ride home. Car broke down a couple miles from here.” 

“Why don’t you just fix it?” Howard asks. “You’re a Stark.” 

“A Stark who would need to order a part for a 1980 Ford Crown Victoria.” 

“Tell him to get a better car.” 

“Sure, pops.” 

“Don’t call me that.” 

“Alright, Dear Father of Mine.” 

“Just go, damn it!” 

- 

Bucky is led to a garage full of luxury cars that probably cost more than his whole block put together. 

“Which one you wanna go in?” 

“Am I allowed in one of these? Holy fuck these are nice.” 

Tony grins. 

“Best part about having a car is driving it. Choose one.” 

Bucky chooses a bright red car, a smooth Cadillac. 

“Holy hell, this is cool.” 

Tony drives. 

He’s a good driver once you get past the fact that you will fear for your life for at least twenty minutes. He is also notoriously terrible in the city traffic, yelling at drivers and pedestrians alike. 

“How are you still alive with the way you drive?” Bucky asks. 

“We made it, didn’t we?” Tony asks, grinning. “Now go return your bike and don’t try to walk to my house again.” 

“See you tomorrow?” 

“Naturally.” 

- 

Tony talks a lot. But Bucky finds himself listening. It still takes a while, but he talks. 

Tony really is smart. His mind just works quickly, and that’s why at school he never really seems to absorb anything. 

Bucky tells him about his neighborhood and how much he hates his neighbor because she keeps blasting music at one in the morning. 

“So? Blast it in the morning,” Tony says. “That’s what I’d do.” 

“Ma would say no.” 

“Then don’t tell her!” 

- 

When it all changes, it’s when Bucky picks him up from a gala. He gets the following text: 

pls come pick me up!! please! i’m begging! 

It’s eleven at night, but Bucky sighs and goes to get the car and goes to pick him up. 

Tony’s swaying outside. Bucky gets out, getting a pack of Marlboro out of his jacket. 

“Shouldn’t smoke,” Tony says. 

“You drunk?” 

“No, can’t risk it when Howard and Maria aren’t here--mom and dad.” 

He almost never calls his parents mom and dad. Ever. Only in public settings. 

Bucky lights up anyway. Tony stares at the orange embers flaring up. 

“Why did you need a ride?” 

“Kind of avoiding an old...enemy. Slash ex-boyfriend.” 

“The worst kind of enemy to have. He trying to talk to you?” 

“It’s been an all-night event, so--” 

The doors burst open. 

Out walks the sleaziest guy that Bucky’s ever seen. His suit is garishly designer, the kind that borders on being confused for a tacky suit that you find in a thrift store for two dollars total. 

“Tony, baby! Where have you been? I wanted to discuss things with you...in private.” 

He gives Bucky a once-over. 

“And who are you, catering?” 

Bucky immediately wants to clock this guy in the damn mouth. 

“Actually this is James, my boyfriend,” Tony says, snaking his arm around Bucky’s waist. 

At this point, he’ll just have to go with it. It’s not the worst thing that’s happened. 

“And who are you?” Bucky asks. “Sweetheart, you never mentioned you knew someone with such a...unique take on style.” 

“I’m Ty, an old and close friend,” he says. He sticks his hand out. Bucky makes him switch hands by holding out his metal hand. 

“Nice to see you,” he says. “But unfortunately, I have to take my guy back home. Plans and all that, you know how it is.” 

“Bye Ty!” Tony says. 

Bucky throws an arm around Tony’s shoulders, bringing him close. A ghost of a kiss to the forehead completes the lie, and Bucky looks back towards Ty, who has his eyes narrowed. 

He flips him off with his right hand. (It’s satisfying.) 

“Thank you so much for going along with that,” Tony says, looking up. 

The cigarette is still in his mouth. He takes a drag, letting embers fall down and disintegrate into the pavement. 

“He seemed like a shitty kind of person.” 

“Not the best of people, that’s for sure,” Tony mutters. “You wanna go get ice cream?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’d like that.” 

- 

Getting late night ice cream is like going into a different dimension. Bucky’s not sure if it’s the overbearing, fluorescent white light that gets to him, but Tony seems tired. At ease, but tired. 

He gets strawberry ice cream, and Bucky gets chocolate. 

They sit and eat for a moment. 

“Why do you go to St. Anthony’s?” Tony asks. “It’s clear you hate it.” 

“You don’t?” 

“Not the worst school I’ve been sent to.” 

“You don’t want to be there either?” 

“There are a lot of places I don’t want to be, but this isn’t about me, I’m asking about you. You wanna share with the class or get a hall pass?” 

Bucky snorts. 

“Geez, okay. My mom really wants a good education for me.” 

"She know that you don’t know what to do?” 

“And how do you figure that?” Bucky asks, eyebrow raised. 

“You wouldn’t be working as a chauffeur for the rich kid if you knew what you were working towards,” Tony says with a shrug. “Seen it happen before. Usually I don’t know who they are, but you figure out commonalities pretty quickly.” 

That makes too much sense. 

“I have no fucking clue how I’m living my life and my mom wants me to become a businessman.” 

“You wanna do that?” 

“Do I look like the kind of guy that wants to wear a suit?” 

“You look like you’d look good in a suit, not that you’d wear one.” 

Bucky laughs. Takes a bite of ice cream, and readjusts the pack of cigarettes in his pocket. 

- 

Over the summer, he and Tony get closer. They take walks in the park and Tony drags him into overpriced shops to look at clothes that are the ugliest goddamn things they’ve ever seen. 

At some point, they hold hands and discuss secrets of the world of theirs that is unique to them. 

Bucky kisses him one night while they’re just leaving perhaps the worst restaurant in the entire state of New York and god Tony didn’t think he’d ever not mind being wrapped up in fake-strawberry scented hair and cigarette smoke clinging to clothing, but he doesn’t mind it. 

The whole summer, they’re inseparable. Tony chatters in the front seat of the car, now, and Bucky smiles a little bit more. 

They walk in parks together and show each other funny little jokes and make inside understandings and look at sunsets and sunrises and get coffee and look at each other across the room. 

- 

It’s love, honest and true. But it’s not love like the never-ending kind. The thing about love is that it is not included in any toolbox, physical or mental. There is one thing that everyone knows regardless of whether it is admitted or not: 

Love does not solve everything. It does not fix everything. And one should never rely on it to do anything but exist and work through your person to the best of its ability. 

- 

Howard comes back from a business trip. Sees Tony kiss Bucky goodbye, and that is that. 

You can’t something like that as a son. It just...it won’t work for business. 

Tony is sent to a boarding school upstate. Stricter guidelines, more controlling. 

Bucky only hears one thing from Tony: 

I’m sorry. 

And he doesn’t believe it. 

When you’re young, you think love is invincible. You think it survives through everything if you really want it to. 

Love doesn’t do that. 

Bucky writes letters, calls Jarvis, and mourns the loss of young love. He smokes a little bit more, leaves it clinging to his skin as a reminder that Tony would always wrinkle his nose in that adorable way, but it served to show Bucky that he had a bad habit. 

He was in the middle of quitting. 

His mother notices it. 

Tells him that he needs to get his own shampoo. 

“You can’t just use mine all the time,” she says playfully. 

He remembers Tony’s hands gently threading through his hair in disbelief as Bucky kissed the living hell out of him. 

Now there’s barely any trace. 

He stops in his tracks when he sees an old coffee cup of Tony’s in his kitchen cabinet. 

“When did you get this one?” Becca asks. She’s drinking out of it. He remembers Tony smiling over it at their little coffee shop that was hidden away. “I love it. It’s so cute.” 

“From a thrift store,” Bucky says. “You can have it.” 

“Really? Thanks!” 

- 

Tony pauses at the smell of cigarette smoke. Remembers blue eyes blazing along with orange embers, smoke curling around long hair and long summer nights. 

His roommate at this new school asks if he smokes, if he can get him a pack. 

“Uh, no. Just used to know someone who did.” 

“You think they could get me a pack?” 

“They don’t go here.” 

“You can’t call them?” 

Tony doesn’t respond. 

You can’t call them? 

He’s almost texted him about twenty times. Called him about thirty. 

He knows the number by heart. 

But he knows that Howard made him get a new phone, and now the memories are fading. He wishes he still had the pictures. 

- 

Love does not always last. Sometimes it is not meant to. Tony tries to tell himself that as he wakes up with tears streaming down his cheeks. 

You always wish it would. 

[tefanfics]

Masterlist

Here is every fic currently on my page! Created 5/10/2020 Updated: 5/21/2020

Changes

Original Fic by yours truly

Chapters: One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen. Fourteen. Fifteen. Sixteen. Seventeen. Eighteen. Nineteen. Twenty. Twenty-One. Twenty-Two. Twenty-three. Twenty-four. Twenty-five. Twenty-six. Twenty-seven. Twenty-eight. Twenty-nine. Thirty. Thirty-one. Thirty-two. Thirty-three. Thirty-four. Thirty-five. Thirty-six. Thirty-seven. Thirty-eight. Thirty-nine. Forty. Forty-one. Forty-two. Forty-three. Forty-four. Forty-five. Forty-six. Forty-seven. Forty-eight. Forty-nine. Fifty. Fifty-one. Fifty-two. Fifty-three. Fifty-four. Fifty-five.

Don’t You Trust Me? 

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3. Part 4.

Fluff - + Angst - *  Trigger Warning - # The more symbols there are, the higher amount of fluff/angst.

One Shots

I don’t know who I am without you by my side. ** You’ve shown me what love can feel like. + Well. Yell, scream, say something. Anything. +*   I think I’m in love with you, and that scares the crap out of me. + What the hell were you thinking? You could’ve been hurt. Wake up. Please wake up. You’re scaring me. - # Shhh, don’t cry. + I can’t keep doing this anymore. * You could always go nude? If I kiss you right now, I won’t be able to stop. + I want a baby. - Baby Part 2 ++ Is it weird that was a total turn on? We’re not just friends, and you fucking know it. ** They’re not your kids, back the fuck off./How is my wife more badass than me? Please don’t cry. +* Can you just hold my hand?/This is my favorite time of day. + My heart tells me to kiss you, my head says to walk away. - Part Two! *+ Please hold me. It’s been a day./I’ve never felt such love. + Detention? Again? Wait, no! Don’t take kissing away from me! + Are you wearing my shirt? + Do you think that everyone was right? That we just don’t work? ** [Text] Do you want to bet on that? ;)  Yeah, well if you weren’t so drunk, maybe I would. + You’re like five feet tall. How are you gonna reach me, shortie? You are infuriating!/Fuck me./Just kiss me. I liked you before you pretended to be somebody else. ** You gave me the best thing I could ask for, a family. + Run away with me? It’s hard for me to tell you I love you when I’m standing at your grave. *** Did you just throw up?  I just wanna lay in your arms for the rest of my life. ++ You’re cute when you try not to blush. + Is that a good feeling or a bad feeling?  You stole my heart like it was nothing. * Let me kiss it better. *+ Stay here tonight. You have no idea how bad I want you right now. Can’t you stay a little longer? I’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time. + Don’t be scared, I’m right here. Don’t shut me out. ** Where is that bruise from? *+ Once, a long time ago, I thought I loved you. ** You’ve always felt like home to me. ++ Oh god... I think I’m in love with you. ++ Can we have more children? +++ This is what kids do to you, having a sneaky wine while hiding from them.  Stomach bug? No, morning sickness. + No, no- it’s alright. Come here.  My waters have just broken. Is this a pregnancy test? ++ I would’ve had breakfast ready, but you were sleeping on my arm, and I didn’t want to wake you. + Did the scary monster get you while you were sleeping? ++ I want a baby.  How long has it been since you slept? You’ve thought about this haven’t you? ***#### Hey don’t do that! You’re gonna get hurt! You replaced me... Just like that? *** You don’t have anything to be sorry for. It’s okay. I understand. You can leave. They all do.  Have you ever kissed anyone before? ++ Where’s your adventurous spirit!? +++ No one has a romantic bone in their body anymore! + Let them sleep. +++

Song Prompts

Tell Me You Love Me - Demi Lovato * Dive - Ed Sheeran *+ Kiss Me - Ed Sheeran ++ Sunday Morning - Maroon 5 ++ Silly Love Songs - Paul McCartney/The Wings + Won’t Go Home Without You - Maroon 5 *+ Bruises - Lewis Capaldi ****# Maybe I’m Amazed - Paul McCartney + Love Somebody - Maroon 5  I’ll Be - Edwin McCain + The Promise - When In Rome +* A Moment Like This - Kelly Clarkson ++ First Day of My Life - Bright Eyes + Happier - Ed Sheeran ** Ruin The Friendship - Demi Lovato Tenerife Sea - Ed Sheeran ++ Sugar by Maroon 5 (Part 2 for Love Somebody) +*

Wordless Prompts

Kiss Before Work - + Travelling Just To See You + Bad Day + First Date + Campfire Kisses + Winter Wonderland Confessions + It’s Raining, It’s Pouring + Heated Argument *+ Eavesdropping + Nightmare + Only One Bed  Secret Kisses + Just An Act. Publicity Dating

Reader Requests

Singing on Set  Feelings & Denial *+

Prompt List Created by Me

Song Prompts

[lesbianlenas]

here are my comprehensive thoughts on bly manor that i have been writing since midway through my watch of the show in case anyone wants 2 hear my thoughts

victoria pedretti’s voice alone makes me want to nut unironically. combo w everything else and she is literally god. knew this from hill house but now she’s blond + playing a lezzie so that amps it all up by 500.

speaking of have so much love in my heart for miss dani clayton. she just wants to help children and is so caring and kind like ok wife? her adorable fake british accent. cannot make tea or coffee. i’m going to call the FUCKING police. determined walk run. tucked in shirt. comp het + internalized homophobia. just so brave and selfless. she has it all. would marry her in half a second.

and the absolute DEDICATION of her stomping on out after flora when viola just almost choked her to death. i’m literally on my knees proposing right now.

flora is so fucking cute absolutely love her would die for her immediately. also sometimes she is creepy and i am very scared of her. duality.

did not enjoy the jump scare w edwin or edward or whatever the fuck mr hetero’s name was i don’t remember. not the car scene like when dani turns around and sees him behind her and then he goes flying back into the mansion. anyway i get he had his heart broken but do not feel good abt how he was basically trying to force dani into marriage by constantly asking her until she said yes. like of course she’s going to eventually give in even if she didn’t want to when he was clearly not going to stop and if she said no instead of pushing it off she would lose basically everyone she considered to be her family. and then when she tells him that she can’t love him romantically he’s like fuck you dani ok homophobe. perhaps i’m glad he got hit by a truck ❤️

immediately noticed smth was up w hannah from the second she wouldn’t eat and i was like oh ok so she’s a ghost. her ep was SO confusing though until the end i was like what the fuck is going on here 😩 anyway hate to be right but. fuck peter quint.

same thing w miles i was like what the FUCK is wrong w this kid and then i was like oh he’s possessed then oh he’s possessed by peter quint in like. ep 2. once again hate to be right. fuck peter quint. also prior to watching the show i rarely saw anything abt miles and i was like why does everyone only talk abt flora? now i get it.

jamie is just so fucking sexy. like the lesbian energy off of her is unreal and smth that you don’t get too often w lesbians on tv. either amelia eve is a dyke or she somehow knows exactly how to emulate them bc truly unreal. only wish is that she didn’t wear makeup but we can’t have it all can we. also cannot stop thinking of her as a mechanic every time she’s wearing that like jump suit and god that would be so fucking sexy i......anyway love her w my whole heart.

speaking of how much i love jamie....the way that she acts all tough and a little cold while she is actually the most empathetic person and somehow knows exactly what to say to anyone when they’re having a rough moment and she won’t sugar coat it either but it’s bc she cares and understands so deeply that it’s ok.....wow. wife?

wish we could’ve gotten to know rebecca more outside of just her relationship w peter. i feel like that did her a major injustice. we practically saw none of her relationship w the kids and it seemed to me like they were trying to imply in the beginning that flora had been very close w rebeccca and i feel like we didn’t see that. felt like rebecca ended up mostly being a prop for peter’s story which was unfortunate considering she was such a great character. and did NOT get why she was so hung up on him either like oh he SEES me after one convo? he was also a dick like immediately after like....once again feels like a disservice that they had her be in love w peter based off of like nothing. like all of a sudden all her ambition is gone and she just wants to b w peter? lol ok.

charlotte cheating on her husband w his brother the absolute mind. fucking hilarious. thought he was jealous at the birth scene or that flora might be his but i was like no no way he probably just has a thing for her. but she is way too attractive for her husband anyway. do not condone cheating but she’s a milf so i let it slide. also flora actually being henry’s hilarious. fucking love this drama. had me rolling. “do you love him?” [silence] LMFAO. and dom’s (got his name!) fucking smack down on henry holy shitttttt will b taking some notes for next time i’d like to turn someone suicidal on fucking god.

i know it was the best vehicle for telling the story but tbh the dream hopping got SO exhausting for me after a while. i just did not enjoy that format. i’m already not one for flashbacks even in this context bc i want to know what’s going to happen next in the main story rather than what happened to get here since i know where it’s going and i just found this to be even more confusing and a little frustrating and incredibly hard to follow. but that’s just my personal taste i wouldn’t objectively say it made the show bad or anything. i think it was also bc all of the twists were unfortunately very obvious so the long drawn out explanations were like. thank u u could’ve said this in five mins instead bc i already knew this. felt like some of the dream scenes were pointless and could’ve been replaced w some better scenes.

flashback ep w viola was ok. kate siegel is so hot obviously but. once again felt extremely extended past the point it had to be. the repition of sleep wake walk was SO annoying like thank u i got it. but i was always a lot more interested in what was happening current day than in the past so once again this was just whatever for me. but good on viola’s hot sister for taking her out have to do what u have to do u know! did enjoy viola killing her back. just thought it was funny.

and how can i even express in words how i felt abt dani and jamie’s relationship? watching the scene where they first kiss literally put me to tears and i just had a real moment w it. and just in general the way that they open up to each other is just so incredible and how jamie makes dani feel so seen that dani literally can’t resist kissing her makes me just. cant put it into words. their relationship really encapsulates what is so beautiful abt lesbianism and that means so much to me truly. will probably make a whole post abt it tomorrow.

ok so in conclusion: i wanted more present day stuff instead of flashbacks. i feel like there was a LOT more creepy shit they could have done in the house and they just. didnt. also wanted to see more of owen in general but also hannah and owen’s relationship and jamie and dani’s relationship. felt like peter and rebecca got practically more screen time than jamie and dani did despite them being the main couple. felt like character & relationships wise there was a lot left unsaid. like yes the plot was finished with a neat bow but i don’t think most of the characters were done justice in the end. and speaking of which i don’t think the sad ending was necessary. do not see a single reason as to why dani needed to die. i feel like they felt it needed a sad ending and that’s why they killed her rather than it actually making sense. like girl get an exorcist. overall the whole thing felt more like an outline for a show that needed to be fleshed out rather than an actual finished show. perhaps could have benefitted from a few more eps maybe. but also. FUCK peter quint.

[ourmixedrealities]

Wanted, Dead Or Alive (Part One)

*I don’t own the pictures or music mentioned in this story*

~WARNING~ Violence (In the future, Not in this part) and Language

Age’s!! You are- 21, Taylor is- 26

~BzzZzzZZzzzZzz~

“Hmm? Hello..?” I answered as my voice cracked without opening my eyes. “Are You still asleep!? You are! Aren’t you!?” a voice I instantly recognized as being my agent cried out. “Huh? Wait what? No... No! No of course not! I’m up... I was just... Changing?” I answered completely panicked as my body shot up instantly remembering I had an audition this morning. “Good! Because I’m waiting for you downstairs, Now please get your ass moving, You don’t want to be late do you!?” I could hear her laugh right before she hung up. Amanda was far to used to me sleeping in when I should be wide awake. I rushed around the room looking for anything that seemed audition appropriate. After changing I booked it downstairs and out the door where I was greeted by my smiling friend Amanda who was holding a donut and an iced coffee for me, Not only was she an amazing agent but she was also far to excellent at reading me “Good Morning sleepyhead.” She mocked jokingly. I gave her a noticeably fake smile. “I know, I know... I’m sorry.” I muttered. “Don’t worry, We are actually early for once.” She admitted seemingly amused at herself.

Once inside the car I asked. “So, What movie is this audition for anyway?” I looked at Amanda as she scrolled through her phone, Within seconds she pulled up the email. “It says its a survival/thriller. I wasn’t able to get very much information on the movie... But! I do know that the director was very adamant on wanting you to play the lead girl.” She handed me the phone to read over everything. “Huh... Weird.” I mentioned as I handed it back. I wasn't a well known actress so it felt weird that this man wanted me as the lead, But who was I to complain about this huge opportunity.

I stared out the window as we pulled up to a beautiful mansion. “I thought we were going to an office?” I questioned unable to take my eyes off the massive building. “This is his office.” She corrected with a smirk. My eyes grew wider.

As I stepped out of the car a motorcycle pulled up next to us. I watched as a man with beautiful golden skin effortlessly hopped off the bike, He removed his helmet from his head reveling his thick black hair. Once again I was in awe as I recognized him as being Taylor Lautner, He smiled my way before walking off. I nudged Amanda as I whispered “What’s he doing here?!” She smiled. “He apparently wants the job as your on screen romance.” I became speechless as I watched him enter the building.

“Now listen closely, This is important... Today you’ll be meeting Mr. and Mrs. Foster. Or rather Edwin and Marie Foster. They’re both extremely important people that you have to impress. Mr. Foster wants you but seeing as Mrs. Foster wrote the book its ultimately up to her if you get the job or not.” Amanda informed. I nodded understanding the gravity of the situation.

Amanda led the way into the home, Surely this had to of been their home and office space, Once inside I realized how wrong I was. A secretary  sat in the center of the room. “Hello! You must be (Y/N)” She cheered. “Mr. Foster is so excited to meet with you. He’s currently seeing someone at the moment but...” she paused as a man began speaking “Come in, Don’t listen to her I’d like to see you now.” He called out causing the woman to loose her big grin, She attempted to smile as we walked away but I could tell it wasn't as sincere.

“Please, Have a seat.” He motioned to me as I wondered into the room, The only chair available being the one next to Taylor, After sitting down he began. “As I see it, You’re both here to try out for the lead roles correct?” Taylor and I nodded. “Yes Sir, That’s correct.” I added quickly. Marie without hesitation cooed “Well now Dear, Obviously Mr. Lautner has the job, I mean look at him, He will make a perfect Wyatt.” Marie stated as she adoringly stared him down. Taylor gave her a considerate but slightly uncomfortable smile. “I could say the same thing about Ms. (Y/L/N), She will make a beautiful Olivia.” He smiled sincerely. “I’m not so sure... I mean, Look at her, Does she really look like an Olivia?” She scoffed. “Dear... Is this really the conversation we should be having in front of our guests?” Edwin added. “No, I supposed you’re right. Taylor, You have the job. You may leave.” Her smile gleaming as she spoke to him. “Thank you so much, Both of you.” Taylor said as he shook their hands, He gave me a quick smile as if to say ‘Good Luck’ then left the room without hesitation. “Do you honestly believe you can handle the roll of playing Olivia?” Marie questioned sternly. “Yes I do... And if I don't preform to your liking I promise to not stop until I am able to satisfy your image.” I vowed. Edwin smiled seemly satisfied with my answer. “Why don’t you please give my wife and I a moment to speak alone.” Edwin stated calmly. I nodded as I stood up from my chair. “Thank you for this opportunity.” I spoke confidently until I left the room.

Amanda and I sat in the waiting room and for minutes I sat there fidgeting with my fingers until Mr. Foster finally walked out. “I’ll give you a call as soon as I can, It’s seems the Mrs. and I are having some problems seeing eye to eye.” I nodded and thanked him before quickly getting out of there, Once back outside I noticed how Taylors ride was still here. 

I turned quickly at the sound of gravel being walked on since it caught my attention. “Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you, I just, It didn’t feel right to leave without saying hi... You’re (Y/F/N)? Right?” He questioned with a smile. “Yeah, Yeah I am! It’s so great to meet you!” I replied back, Amanda gave us space and waited patiently in the car. “I thought I recognized you, I saw you in ‘The Quiet Vandals Club’ You were really good!” He amused. “Oh my God, Yeah! Thank you! That sincerely means so much to me especially coming from you!” I remarked in awh of him. “Would you want to get coffee or something sometime?” He asked carefully but confidently. “I would like that a lot.” I admitted as I could feel my heart beat out of my chest. “Great! I can’t wait.” He smiled. We exchanged numbers and went our separate ways both with smiles on our faces.

As soon as I sat down Amanda began “Soooo, How’d it go? What did you think?” She said with a smirk. “Honestly? None of that went as I was expecting...” I laughed thinking back on the meeting and getting a coffee date with Taylor. “Don’t worry, Mr. Foster will fight for you. He knows you're a great actress and would be the perfect Olivia.” Amanda ensured. I shrugged as I was feeling unsure about the whole situation. “I’m not worried about Mr. Foster... I’m actually worried about his wife... She didn’t seem to like me to much.” I admitted as I sank deeper into my seat. “Welcome to the real world, Not everyone will love you, But you know who you are so their opinions truly don't matter.” Amanda smiled, I knew she was right but the idea still hurt.

I stared out the window until my phones vibration knocked me out of my trance. 

‘Hey! It’s Taylor, I’m stuck at a red light right now so I figured it was the perfect time to ask if you’d like to get that cup of coffee with me tomorrow? Again! No pressure, If you’re busy or just don’t want to no big deal. If you want to go then just send me your address and I can pick you up! Regardless it was great meeting you. Gotta go! The light’s green!’

I must of read the text at least fifteen times before I could stop giggling. “What’s so funny?” Amanda asked with a similar smile on her face, She was the type of friend whose happiness came from seeing her friends happy. “Nothing.” I replied with a huge smile on my face, Clearly unable to hide my excitement. “I just... I’m going on a date tomorrow!” I cheered. “Ahh!! That’s amazing! Congratulations!” She sang.

‘Tomorrow most definitely works for me, My address is (Y/A) I can’t wait to see you, And it was great meeting you too.’ I attempted to pretend like it was no big deal but in person you could tell I was losing my mind.

(The Next Day)

‘I’ll be at your house shortly’

‘See you then!’

*Knock Knock Knock*

“Have you ever been on a motorcycle before?” Taylor asked with a grin on his face. I shook my head nervously. “I promise to keep you safe if you’ll trust me enough to take a ride.” Taylor offered a helmet which I hesitantly took. Even with his helmet on I could tell Taylor was still smiling, His tone and body langue confirmed it. “Ready?” He asked as I held onto his shoulders. “Yeah... I think so.” I stated nervously. “Here, Wrap your arms around my waist, It’s safer this way.” He corrected with a chuckle. I squeezed him even tighter. We sped through the streets until we reached a little coffee shop I’ll admit my eyes were sealed shut the majority of the time, But I was all smiles as I climbed off his bike. “That was amazing!! What a rush!” I exclaimed as I removed the helmet, feeling the adrenalin rush throughout my body. Taylor laughed. “See! I told you it’s not that bad. Hopefully now you’ll be able to trust me a little more.” He smirked. I instantly grew shy “Yeah, Maybe I will.” I stated with a smile.

The entire date Taylor was the perfect gentleman, We talked for hours when it felt like mere minutes. I was enthralled with every word he spoke. From the way he smiled and laughed to the way he carried himself. My heart skipped a beat once he reached across the table to take my hand in his. Before we knew it the once sunny neighborhood turned dark and gloomy. “Damn... I should probably get you home so we don’t get stuck in the rain.” I could tell he was bummed which made me even happier. “Sounds good.” I said with a smile, I was endlessly excited to cling onto his back once again.

The down pour hit at the perfect moment, I wasn’t sure if Taylor felt the same way until he parked his bike under the bridge, Took off his helmet and began laughing. His laugh being the contagious one that it is I began laughing with him. “Do you...This is an odd request but...” I began softly. “Would you maybe want to dance with me in the rain?” I offered, I almost expected him to turn me down until he took my hand and brought me out into the storm. Taylor pulled out a pair of earphones placing one carefully in my ear and the other into his, The song ‘Lay your head on me’ By Major Lazer played. Our bodies becoming in sync as the rain danced around us. I laid my head onto his chest feeling his breath match mine. I couldn't help but smile to myself. How was this happening? This had to be a dream that I never wanted to wake up from. I glanced up at him as he looked down to me our lips colliding sending me into a whirlwind of emotions. Taylor picked me up by my thighs as I wrapped my legs around his waist, He quickly brought us back under the bridge where my back rest gently on the wall. My fingers ruffling up his dampened hair. Taylor removed his leather jacket that was quickly shrinking due to the rain. Sadly for me as soon as Taylor began kissing my neck the rain halted giving us our escape. “Seeing as I’m sure you don’t have any guy’s clothes at your place would you want to come to mine? I’ll take you home whenever you’d like, I just think we should probably get out of our wet clothes.” He smirked as he looked down at his now see through white shirt. “I mean, I’m not one to complain about a great view but seeing as I am also not ready for tonight to end, Yes. I’d like that a lot.” I smirked as I took out the earphone that was currently playing ‘Wonder’ By Shawn Mendes.

Taylor dodged puddles left and right all the way back to his place, The cold air caused chills to crawl up and down my body. Taylor and I pulled into the garage right before the next cloud burst. “That was lucky!” I announced as I hopped off the bike. “Yeah! Tell me about it, You may just be my lucky charm.” Taylor pulled a face as I began laughing. “That was cheesy huh?” He chuckled. “Just a little, But it’s fine, truth be told I like cheesy.” I admitted as I kissed his cheek. Taylor quickly wrapped his arms around me as he led me into his house. “Feel free to make yourself at home, I’ll go grab you a change of clothes.” He smirked as he wondered off into a room. I removed my shoes by the door then had a look around the room, It was absolutely stunning, He had photos of people I assumed to be his friends and family, Pets.

“Here you go.” A shirtless Taylor spoke as he handed me a towel a top and sweat pants. “Thanks.” I replied as I attempted to not stare at him and his body. I could see Taylor smirking in the corner of my eye. Perhaps I was a little obvious with how purposefully I attempted to be respectful. “You can change in there, If you’d like.” Taylor pointed to a room across from his bedroom. “Thanks.” I repeated feeling flustered. 

I rushed inside of the room and locked the door behind me. Thankfully he sent me into his bathroom where I decided to take the time to make sure the rain didn't make me look to crazy. Once satisfied with my hair and appearance I changed then left the room with my wet clothes. Taylor instantly spotted me. “Oh! Here, Let me help you.” He rushed over to take my clothes. “I’ll put them in the drier so you don’t have to later.” He offered. I nodded appreciatively. 

While he handled the laundry I sat onto his couch causing me to catch a whiff of his cologne that was left on his clothes. Instantly I sank deeper into the couch. I couldn't help but smile, I sincerely liked him and I knew if feelings weren't mutual it would hurt like hell to move on. Things just seemed to be easier with him, My worries and fears vanished into thin air. I tucked my legs to my chest as I sat and waited for Taylor to return. 

Just before I could feel myself begin to fall asleep Taylor vaulted the couch to be right next to me. “Impressive.” I noted with a grin. “Why thank you.” He remarked back with a smirk. as he did a mini bow. 

Within no time we were cuddling on his couch under a blanket using each others body heat for our own benefit. Even through his shirt I could feel the heat radiating off of him. I used his chest as a pillow until I couldn't bare to keep my eyes open any longer, And Taylor allowed it. The last thing I felt was a soft kiss at the time of my head.

(To Be Continued)

[my-whumpy-little-heart]

Best AU Part 2: The Pining Awakens

This is a fanfiction written with the permission of @spookyboywhump and @ihaventwritteninsolong. This chapter features Allen’s characters Wren and Zander, with plenty of references to Edwin’s character Cathal.

Wrote this pure, unadulterated fluff to help get out of the writing block I got driven into near the end of May. A nice, happy palate cleanser if you will. Linked here is the previous part to this with proper explanation as to what’s going on with this universe lol.

-----------------------------------------

Zander hadn’t moved from his one spot on the couch since he’d come in some twenty minutes earlier. At first, Wren thought he might have just been in a mood. He got quiet like that sometimes after a particularly bad day... would sit on the couch, curled up as he broke down slowly, and Wren could only hope Zander would open up and talk a little so he could help.

But today was different. He’d been curled up, staring intently at his phone, typing and scrolling at odd intervals. A vaguely frustrated expression was set into his face, but there was something softer behind it. Slowly, carefully, Wren walked over from the kitchen and sat on a chair across from the couch.

Zander didn’t even look up.

“Soo… how was your day?” Wren asked softly, and Zander jerked in surprise. It was like he hadn’t even noticed his presence. 

“Mmh, good,” he hummed, and Wren had to hold back a smile at his transparency. 

“Anything... particularly good happen?”

“No.” Zander bit back a guilty smirk, but he saw the beginnings of it on his face. As he stood from his chair, Wren was sure he’d never heard a worse lie in his life. 

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

“So I’m guessing there’s also no reason you’ve had your nose buried in your phone since the minute you got here?”

Zander sighed heavily, breath hitching with barely contained laughter, clicking off his phone and shooting a tired glance at Wren. The shorter man had the height advantage for once, and walked over to stand above Zander as he curled further back into the couch. He had his hands on his hips and the smarmiest grin plastered on his face.

“C’mon. What’s their name, Zander?”

“Huh? Whose name?” he asked, still feigning ignorance.

“The cute person you met today and can’t stop thinking about, obviously.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Zander said quickly, almost too quietly for Wren to hear.

“And I don’t know your phone password so I can catch you off guard and verify my theory,” he smiled, and his friend sighed. They’d played that game before, and Zander had always lost in the end. He could change the passcode or leave entirely, but he knew he was fighting a losing battle at this point.

“So~” he sing-songed, “What’s their name?”

“I dunno, I didn’t catch it,” Zander shrugged.

Wren gave him a pointed glare.

“Cathal.”

The glare intensified.

“Ugh, Cathal Weber. That’s his full name. Happy now?”

“Very,” Wren grinned devilishly, flopping on the couch next to him and snuggling up close so he could stare at the glowing phone screen. It was open to the Instagram search bar, no results showing. “Did you find all his social media accounts yet?”

“Literally the opposite,” he groaned, “Sir Cute Hot Chocolate Man has apparently never seen a computer in his life.”

“So you met him at work, then,” Wren declared.

“Ugh, yes. And before you yell at me, he was new, and I did ask for his last name even though I didn’t need it,” he muttered. 

“Zander…” he adopted a serious expression, voice heavy with false concern, “you can’t keep doing this...”

“Fuck you, I do what I want.” Zander grabbed a pillow and swung it weakly at him as the younger man snickered.

“Alright, so tell me more about this Cathal “Hot Chocolate Hottie” Weber,” he mimed quotes with his fingers, and Zander went red.

“Hey, don’t call him that!” he pouted indignantly.

“Oh right, I forgot. The cute nicknames are just for you lovebirds,” Wren teased.

“I just met him!”

“And look at the mess he’s made of you already…”

“I’m perfectly put together and can absolutely banish his glorious fucking face from my mind whenever I want to, thank you very much!” Zander shouted, face almost completely red at that point.

Wren let the silence hang in the air for a few seconds.

“So.”

“So, what?” Zander crossed his arms.

“You have a lot to say right now and you’re not letting it out.”

“Maybe.” Wren raised a brow, waiting for him to go on. “Okay! So, imagine the hottest, most angelic human being you’ve ever seen, then-”

“Zander, you lost me already.”

“Aghhhhh, are you seriously gonna make me describe him?”

“Listen, unless you want me to picture a person on fire every time you call this boy hot because that’s all the word hot means to me, then I’m gonna need some words to go off of,” Wren said, waving his hands animatedly as he spoke.

“Alright. Imagine this boy; he’s only a little shorter than me-”

“Aw come on, not another giant in the family!” he whined.

“Do you want to hear or not?!”

“Oh no, go on, go on. I’ll be crying in Short over here.” Wren sank back into the couch, and Zander sighed heavily before he spoke again. 

“...okay. A little shorter than me, and cute kinda wavy hair that just looked really soft. It was sort of blond-ish, but a little sandier? Hard to describe, but he had the most breathtaking blue eyes and wore this apron in the same color that really brought them out...” he trailed off, expression dreamy and caught up in the memory of Cathal.

“Sorry, apron? You didn’t say he was a new coworker, unless...”

“No, he works at that flower shop down the street. Sunflora.”

“I still can’t believe they named it after a Pokémon,” Wren laughed. “But cute boy? Likes flowers? I can telepathically sense that he’s a twink? Might as well have taken a boy and printed ‘Zander’s type’ on his forehead.”

“Oh my god, Wren, shut up. You can’t just break into my mind to get a look at the hot guy, that’s a breach of privacy.”

“Hot, shmot. I wouldn’t waste my mind reading powers on that,” he waved a dismissive hand. “Now tell me about his alluring personality.” Wren wiggled his eyebrows jokingly and Zander rolled his eyes.

“Well, okay first off, he was super polite and nice, and he did the cutest thing where he forgot he was wearing his work name tag, right? And I felt really bad for reading his name off of it at the time and I think it freaked him out a bit, but it was really charming how genuine he was too you know? And then he ordered his hot chocolate with marshmallows, and that was just- really fucking cool of him. Like, could you ever get the courage, as a full grown adult, to ask for marshmallows in your drink and not immediately feel like someone’s gonna look down on you?”

“Zander, I still get carded for buying wine at the grocery store. I’ve transcended embarrassment and risen into a plane of pure indifference.”

“Okay, well that doesn’t apply to you. But still, even just working at a flower shop? Screw gender roles and societal norms and all that, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t gonna be climbing out of the woodwork to drag you for being a man who dares to get anywhere near flowers. I just- He had the most beautiful laugh. And he was wearing the cutest sweater too, with a collared shirt under it in these nice pastel colors and I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more confident and fucking badass than that…” Zander trailed off, tears glistening in his eyes.

“...you need a minute?”

“No, no I’m good I just-” Zander sat up, wiping at his eyes, but when Wren wrapped him up in a hug he fell apart completely. “Wren… oh, Wren, he’s fucking incredible…” He tucked his head in the crook of Wren’s neck, arms shaking and eyes glassy, “...and I know he’s never gonna like me back, or I might never see him again, but I’m never gonna forget him for as long as I live…”

“Woah, hey, slow down,” Wren said, rubbing circles into his back absentmindedly. “You can’t just make assumptions like that before you know more. We’ve talked about this.”

“But every time, I swear, all the pretty guys are straight, and all the nice girls are gay, and if they aren’t any of those then they’re aro, or they’re taken…” he rested his full weight against Wren, who laid down sideways with a small ‘oof’, wrapping his arms tighter around his friend.

“Let me ask you a question then. How much time did it take him to say a word when he first stepped up to the counter?” 

“Well… probably thirty seconds at least? But that was definitely my fault for tripping over my line, and then that whole name thing…”

“Mmhmm, right,” Wren nodded, “I’m only gonna take your first sentence into account there. So when he did speak, how much did he trip over his words?”

“Oh, a lot actually, but I think he just had a stutter.”

“Okay, fair,” he conceded, “different question then. What was he staring at when he wasn’t talking?”

“Uhhhh…” Zander trailed off, trying to remember. “I don’t know, he kinda looked around in front of him without moving his head very much, like he was lost?”

“That’s called ‘checking you out,’ dumbass. He’s definitely into you.”

Zander made an unbelieving ‘hmph’ sound and wrapped himself tighter around Wren, making sure to move further to the side so he didn’t suffocate him. 

“Alright, you gotta move though so I can cook-” he started, but cut himself off when Zander looked up, his dark eyes silently pleading. “-but on second thought, I’m really hungry for pizza tonight. Wanna order out?”

“Yeah, sounds good,” Zander sighed, tucking his head back down as Wren dug out his phone and dialed their favorite restaurant. He was silent then, except for a quick whispered reminder to request an extra turn in the oven so their pizza would still be nice and crispy when it arrived.

They were quiet for a long while after that, and by the time the doorbell rang Zander’s breathing had evened out and he slept peacefully, still holding on to Wren.

Bonus: here are the only notes I made before writing this chapter.

“Plans: hmm wren. Then they get to cuddle because allen can’t fucking stop me. But wren is still being petty because i love him“

and that’s the tea, really.

[znaeb]

Heyho ! So fist if I want to say that your blog is absolutely AMAZING ! And second of i LOVE your Zion Fight oneshot and I wanna request something like that so that me an Zion are fighting really bad and the other guys hear us and are scared that we break up bc they love the relationship that me and Zion have..LOTS OF LOVE TO YOU 💗

Self Inflicted | Z.K.

Lots of love to you too, anon!

****

You sat on the bed in his room, crying. You’d been able to keep your tears in until Zion stormed out, slamming the door hard enough to shake the entire house.

The front door shut loudly downstairs and you tried to hold in the little sobs that were trying to force their way up your throat. You crawled to the head of the bed and hugged a pillow to your stomach, burying your face in it and letting yourself cry.

You hadn’t even been home from work an hour and you’d already gotten into a screaming match.

For 30 minutes you both shouted at each other from across the bedroom, each sentence meaner than the next. Your emotions running high and the stress of both of your jobs making you unable to see that the other was struggling also.

After Zion left, Austin came to check on you, he asked what was going on. If you guys were breaking up— which wasn’t an unreasonable question considering how often you two ended your days in an argument.

When Austin went back downstairs a while later your mind raced. You didn’t know what to do.

———

He was angry. So angry. And he didn’t know why.

On his lengthy walk down the street to his car he thought about everything. Everything he said, everything you said. Everything. He didn’t know how this was going to turn out. He felt like his whole relationship was falling apart, like his whole life was falling apart.

He felt like yelling at himself, he wanted to go back and talk about it. He wanted to hash everything out, he wanted to get over it... but he didn’t know how to fix things.

Tears of anger and frustration built up in his eyes as he got to his car, he groaned in frustration and hit his steering wheel. Hard.

“Ah, fuck!” He yelled as he clutched his right hand with his left, leaning foreword and resting his head against the top of the steering wheel.

He tried to sit up but every time he did he felt like he was going to pass out. Little black dots appearing in front of his eyes.

He used his un-injured hand to pull his phone out of his back pocket and selected your contact before hitting ‘call’.

It rang about 8 times and he almost thought you were going to let him go to voicemail, but then you picked up.

“Look if you’re just calling to scream at me again then I’m gonna to hang up.” He could tell you were crying and he immediately felt like the worst person in the entire world.

“No... I-I’m in my car and I think I broke my hand? I feel like I’m going to pass out, can you please drive me to the urgent care clinic? Please?” He cringed at how stupid he sounded.

“You what? How the hell did you break your hand? You left 20 minutes ago! Zion, what happened?” He could hear you walking down the stairs and shuffling around, little sniffles leaving her nose periodically.

“... I punched the steering wheel.”

“Zion!”

“I was upset!” Then he heard your footsteps as you jogged down the street towards his car.

“Oh my god.” You spoke as you opened the car door. He turned his head to look but kept his forehead on the wheel.

“Hi.” He sighed in embarrassment and closed his eyes, “please help.”

You rolled your eyes and grabbed on to his shoulder to help him out of the drivers seat and around to the passenger side. You had to let him lean on you as he walked to the other side of the car, still feeling like he could faint.

———

The wait at the E.R. was tense. Zion bounced his leg and you leaned your head on your hand trying not to think about the events that lead up to you being here.

Between his broken hand and your tear stained cheeks you two were quite the pair, receiving odd looks from staff and other injured and sick people coming in.

Every once in a while one of you would glance at the other. Feeling infinitely guilty. You’d both been so nasty to each other, you couldn’t believe some of the things you’d said.

After about a half-hour of waiting they finally called for Zion. Normally you’d have gone with him, but today you didn’t. He came out a while later with a light blue cast on one hand and a prescription for pain killers in the other.

You stood as he approached, neither of you said anything as you walked to the car. When you got there you tried to pull open your door, but it was quickly shut again by Zion’s good hand pushing against the window.

You didn’t turn around, you could already feel your face getting hot and your eyes getting watery.

“Can I open my door, please?” You said weakly, wiping your cheek with your sleeve.

“Baby, I’m sorry...” you felt him step closer behind you, his hand leaving the car door and landing on your hip. His nose in your hair.

You covered your face with your hands as the tears started to fall. He wrapped his arms around your middle and kissed your neck, mumbling kind words softly into your ear.

You turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck. You could feel his shoulders shaking as he buried his face in your shoulder, his hand clutching your side.

When you pulled back he looked away, trying to wipe his cheek before you saw he’d been crying. You put your hands on either side of his face and he leaned down to kiss you, it was soft and apologetic.

You pulled apart and he walked around the car to his side. You drove home in the quiet, neither of you angry anymore, just tired.

———

When you got home it was nearing 1am. You both shlumped into the house, kicking off your shoes and making your way to the stairs.

On the way past the living room you heard someone say, “hey!”

You turned your head to see all four of the other boys sitting in front of the TV. All of them now staring at you two.

“Oh fuck, here we go.” Zion mumbled under his breath, then loud enough for them to hear: “what’s up guys?”

“How’s um... how’s mom and dad doing?” Edwin asked using the groups nickname for you two— since you were always the reliable, stable ones. Since since were always together.

There was an awkward pause. You hesitated to speak because, well, you didn’t know. “Um...” you looked at Zion, but before you could finish your sentence he placed a hand on your hip and stepped a tiny bit further into the room, eyes still on the boys.

“We’re okay...” he kissed the top of your head and gave your side a gentle squeeze, “It’s gonna be okay...”

****

I hope this is okay! I’m not sure how I feel about it, but I didn’t want to leave you hanging :P thanks for reading and thank you again for requesting!

[rogue-barnes-16]

HEAL ME (part X/X)

Summary: She was a nurse. He was a soldier. They fell in love at first sight. It was beautiful, true love. But something isn’t beautiful because it lasts.

Pairing: 40's!Bucky Barnes x nurse!Reader

Title: I'll be seeing you

Genre: hypocritical fluff

Tags:

Heal me:

@just-add-butter @mannls @bethanyzed @fandom-addict-aesthetics @kitttysblog @roxytheimmortal @futuremrspeterparkerholland @i-am-a-fandom-slut @mrsbarneswillseeyounow @chook007 @avengersassemblee @littlephoenix-fire @androgynouswolfcookiemug @babyplutoszx2 @calspalkira @unnecessarydelivery @-lilacnialler- @silver-winter-wolf

Permanent taglist:

@notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @almostmellowsalad @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125 @unlikelygalaxygiver

Warnings: language, feels, angst shit

A/N: final chapter, but there's a EPILOGUE left, welcome to the peak of angst of these series. Also, I use Roman numbers for my chapters, but my bestfriend commented the other day that most people don't find it easy to understand??? Let me know if you can understand them easily plz <3.

Heal me masterlist

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

Soon I was in an American bus, making my way to Brooklyn, more specifically to the Barnes' house.

All I remembered from the previous days was crying for Bucky, because he was not supposed to die, because I loved him and because he loved me.

I should have gone to the mission with them, I should have argued more, he would eventually have given in ;I should have tell him I loved him, even if I had told him already, even if he knew it; I shouldn't have gotten mad at him for protecting me, at least not in that moment.

It wasn't fair, because now I had to live with the guilt, and not just the one that came with Bucky’s death, but also the one that hit me after Steve's.

I never would get to apologize with any of them, I would never be able to make amends with those two Brooklyn boys.

I pushed back all those thoughts for a moment, and after taking a deep breath, I knocked the Barnes' door and waited for them to open it.

"Y/n? Darlin' so good to see you again!" Mrs. Barnes greeted, slowly opening the door. "what're ya doin' here, hun?" I didn't open my mouth, I couldn't part my lips. "you came to visit ya ma?" her voice had dropped subtly, almost as if she knew.

She knew, but was waiting for me to deny it.

I didn't shake my head no, I didn't speak the dreadful news, I only took one of my hands to my bag and grabbed Bucky’s military hat.

As I handed it to Mrs. Barnes, I saw the color leaving her face, but she didn't cry. "Where's Steve? Why isn't he with ya, hun?" her trembling voice asked in a puddle of nerves.

This time I did shake my head no, and tears were spilled. I didn't notice Rebecca coming to us until she was sobbing too.

"I'm sorry..." I apologized in a broken whisper. "It's my fault" I didn't even realize what I was saying, not even when they turned to look at me. "It's my fault he's dead... I'm- I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. It's my fault" confusion showed up on their faces while they looked at me. I finally broke down to tears, covering my mouth with one hand, trying desperately to hold back the sobs because I didn't deserve to cry with them. "I'm sorry" I repeated, but this time came out too broken to be understood, too muffled to be heard. I shut my eyes, not wanting to see the two women. "I'm so sorry- it's my f-fault I-" the sobs turned worse and my head started to spin. I had to hold onto the door frame because now with my eyes closed, the only thing I could see was Bucky's face. "I should've been there... Oh God I should have been there I'm sorry... I'm so sorry- Oh my God-"

I felt someone's trembling arms hugging me. "it ain't your fault, Y/n." it was Rebecca's voice. "it ain't on you."

A Month Later

"Y/n, love!" Mary, my bestfriend, called my name from the entrance of our house. "There's a man here who wanna see ya!"

After what happened to Bucky and Steve, after all the guilt and the sorrow, I didn't think twice before leaving the Howling Commandos. Some of the boys had tried to talk me out of it, but they couldn't have changed my mind about a decision I had made more than two years ago.

To my surprise, the boy standing in front of Mary, was non other than the one who supported my decision. "Gabe?"

"Hey" he gave me a small smile while I requested Mary to leave us. "How ya doin'?"

"I'm just trynna live" I quietly replied, stepping aside and motioning him to get in. "How come you're here?"

He hesitantly stepped in the living room, looking around. "I... We've been cleaning up" I nodded, closing the door before sitting in the sofa. "and Uh..."

"I took my things when I left." I informed him, figuring he might have mistaken and item in Bucky’s things for something mine.

"yeah, no, but-" he cleared his throat and, after taking his hand to his bag, he handed me an envelope. "this got ya name."

I stared at the envelope for a while. It had my name written over it, not just once, but four times. Three of them were crossed out, like he had been going to give it to me, and then he had regretted it.

"Morita had it between his things... Apparently Bucky gave it to him the day-"

"I don't want it" I muttered, unaware of the tears streaming down my cheeks until one fell over the same envelope.

"I'll leave it here, though." Gabe stated, getting up "in case you change your mind."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I didn't read the letter.

But it sat there, in my tiny wooden nightstand, and I was greeted with that view every morning, when I woke up to go to work in Kew Gardens General Hospital; every evening, when I came back and went to sleep; every singled time I entered.

And it wasn't like I couldn't remove it from the nightstand and put it inside that brass box of photographs an small things I had from War.

I could grab the damn letter and put it in that box that I knew I wouldn't open in several years, but I wasn't able to.

Because it was Bucky’s letter. It was what he had written me God knows when, it was a letter he had planned to give me several times, but something made him change his mind.

It wasn't just a letter.

It was something else, something I was completely sure that if I opened, I would throw away any opportunity of moving on.

But did l want to move on from that witty, kind-hearted brunette that I had fallen for in a crowded Brooklyn bar?

Days passed by, and in a sunny morning, after driving my bestfriend child to school, I decided I didn't want to move on just yet.

I waited until the kid had jumped out the car to open the envelope.

My shaky hands tore it, and something fell to the car's floor.

A ring. A beautiful wedding ring that made me let out the first sob.

Y/n,

If you receive this letter is because something bad happened to me.

I'm sorry doll, I really wanted to tell you how I feel about you, but I chickened out every time you talked to me.

I'm sure it wouldn't have happened if we'd come this close before I was captured.

I want you to know I fell for those fiery eyes and that damn smile the first time you asked me to dance that night back in Brooklyn, and I hope you know how thankful I am to have been able to meet that gal in the blue dress again, to get to know her.

I'm so mad at myself because I lost the opportunity to tell you.

Bucky

I didn't understand the point of this letter, since he had already told me most of the things written down. Then I realized he had written and crossed my name a few times.

This was the first version.

I'm glad I kissed you again, it felt really nice and gave me hope, but again but I know how is war, and I know you'll end up receiving this letter.

I love you, doll, I'm so sorry I didn't tell you.

I turned the page, tears streaming down my cheeks.

Don't read anything of the other side of the letter, I wrote it before this mission. I wrote it every time I thought I could die, for you to have something mine.

God I'm sorry, I know it sounded stupid, but I want you to remember me. Please, don't forget me.

A couple of nights ago you asked me what would happen if you died. Doll, you're not gonna die while I'm alive, and that's why I know you'll end up receiving this.

I love you Y/n

I knew I was gonna start to read the last version of the letter, and I was not ready. But I couldn't leave it now.

Y/n,

I hope you don't receive this, I wanna come back, I have something really important to do.

I'm 100% 90% sure that I'll get to cross out your name again, and the moment I do, I'm gonna trash this stupid letter and we'll go to Brooklyn.

But in case I'm wrong, in case you receive this, I want you to know that this ring was for you. It still is, it always will, because I'm in love with you and not even death can change that.

I'll be seeing you.

Yours, Bucky.

I couldn't physically move, I was catatonic.

This couldn't be happening to me, I refused to accept his intention was to propose the moment Stark landed in England with Zola, I refused to believe his things were packed because he meant it when he told me we were coming back to Brooklyn.

I convinced myself that it wasn't true for years

6 Years Later

I was picking up the mail when I noticed a particularly odd envelope with my name.

LIEUTENANT Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N:

We are recruiting former soldiers and agents for a new unit, born from the ashes of the Strategic Scientific Reserve, and founded by Agent Margaret Elizabeth Carter.

We are in need of an expert in the medical field, and miss Carter assured us there was no better nurse than you.

In case you need more information, come to visit us to the address written in the back of the envelope.

Edwin Jarvis

One single envelope that was about to change my life.

[nickmuch]

e.j.h. - teo

NOTE: am i a writer? No. Did i have nothing to do at work bc i finished all my stuff 3 hours too early and wrote an imagine out of boredom? Yes.

Also: I seriously wrote this as a joke, but oof 3 pages long?? Just for it to stay locked up on my laptop?? No, ma’am. So I decided to post it here. It’s obviously not bomb and english is not my first language, so don’t roast me pls :(

„Hey…“ he said after entering her room. It was so soft that it could barely be heard at first. However, his presence was felt in the house the moment he had opened the gate. The walls were too thin for her liking and she felt like she had been eavesdropping even though all he did was take off his shoes, put them neatly behind the front door and slowly climb up the stairs to the master’s bed room. He was cautious. Way too cautious, she thought. That made her stomach churn again.

“Talk to me”. His hand touched her forearm lighty, making his way up to her shoulders, then across her collar bone, to her jaw and lastly holding onto her cheeks with both his hands softly but firm enough for her to know that this was real. That he was real. They were real.

Life felt like a simulation these days. She couldn’t feel anything besides her tiredness. Ironically, everything seemed as if she was in a dream world. She was the eyes to a video game character but couldn’t feel what its shallow body felt. Like an illusion.

“I … I-“. She tried to talk to him. After all he didn’t do anything wrong, he wasn’t the reason for her horrible mind-state. Hell, she didn’t even know why she felt so unsure, so irritated and aloof, keeping him at a distance she didn’t feel comfortable with because he was her safe place. Edwin was her safe place.

Her mouth was dry, making her voice raspy when she finally found the words to speak. “I am scared of losing you”. Six words. Six words that held so much more meaning to them than it seemed. Because it didn’t just mean that she was scared of losing him. It meant that she loved him. That she couldn’t imagine a life without him in the picture. That there was this big possibility she could lose her best friend any moment now and that drove her wild.

His eyebrows furrowed. A slight frown visible on his delicate face and his mouth pouty from thinking of what could have possibly happened that she even thought for a second he would ever leave her alone like that. “Whatchu mean?”.

She pulled away. He didn’t know. Of course he didn’t know because for the past week she had been ignoring him mercilessly. It was the fear that kept her from telling him, talking to him, seeing him. The way he would react? Only god knew. But it’s been a week and sooner or later she did have to face him. With or without fear of losing him.

Suddenly her head felt dizzy and before Edwin could process what was going on, she was already on her feet running and hunched over the toilet to empty her stomach. Not that she had eaten anything and even if she did, it didn’t stay for long anyways. “Mi amor” he murmured. He didn’t know what was going on but he for sure wasn’t going to leave her on her own while she felt this miserable. “What did you eat? Did that upset your stomach or something?”. Before he could receive an answer to his question, she was throwing up again. Finally, after what felt like an eternity to her, she turned her body towards him. As if on cue, his arms were wrapped around her securely, holding her fragile self like a safety blanket, ready to protect her from everything evil in this world.

It was only a look, but enough for him to see what she was trying to tell him all this time. Now it all made sense: her avoiding him, the nausea, the tears she shed the last time they saw each other. She was talking to Zion in the PM backyard then. Hushed whispers mixed with frantic worried looks. Soft touches. An unwary smile from Z. Not gonna lie, Ed did feel jealous when he saw them together like that. Who could blame him, though? Last time he checked she was his official-but-not-so-official-girlfriend, promoted from best friend to lover after their last wild party weeks ago. The party itself wasn’t so wild, but what happened between her and Ed after was. So, naturally he felt annoyed that she would go to Zion with her problem instead of him.

Now she was in his embrace on the cold floor while they seemed to be waiting for her next nauseous moment. “You are, aren’t you?” he asked. It was more like a statement. In his mind he had already pieces two and two together. Edwin knew that she was, it was a feeling deep down. A shaky breath left her lips, followed by a short nod of her head. “Are you mad? Are you going to leave? I- I don’t know what to do, you always keep a cool head when things blow up. I am not good with this. How are we supposed to tell the others? Will we even- “. He didn’t let her finish. Too many thoughts clouded her mind and Edwin knew the only way to make it stop was to answer her questions. And so he did by kissing her passionately like never before. The kiss was supposed to tell her that everything was going to be alright, that he wouldn’t leave their side even if the world would end tomorrow. “You talk too much. Let your heart speak for once, mi amor”.

A smile crept up her face. It felt so foreign, she couldn’t remember the last time she had a smile on. Probably two weeks ago before her life was turned upside down in just a matter of 5 minutes. “You sure?”. Her voice seemed stronger now. Edwin took his time before answering. “All I know is that I wanna spend my life with you. Forever. We’ve been best friends for years now and ever since … ever since-“. She nodded quickly, signaling for him that it was okay he felt so nervous and to just continue whenever. “We weren’t supposed to sleep with each other because we’re best friends. Always been”. This made her heart beat faster and scared that this whole conversation was close to taking a different turn than expected. “But maybe” he began. “Maybe we were supposed to be lovers and not best friends all along”. Suddenly Edwin fell backwards a bit. She couldn’t help herself and hug him with so much force and passion. This needed to be true. This needed to be real and not just a simulation of her weird twisted fantasy. That’s why she engulfed him as tight as her weak body allowed.

“So, I’m willing to try and not only be there for you, but also for them. No matter the decision. I want this to work out. I want us to work out. And it will”. The look in his eyes was determined. He was more than sure that this was what he wanted, what was always truly in his heart but couldn’t be said out loud in fear of ruining everything they had built in their friendship. It was too precious for that. But right now was the perfect time and so he did. He told her what was going on in his mind for what felt like years, but really it had only been a couple weeks since he knew what he felt for her and yet, they both believed this love would never end.

Edwin seemed to have an imaginary bullet-list in his head. The way he concentrated and stared into the distance while trying to think and say all the things he loved about her. The way she would make sure to call him at least twice a day – as a good morning and good night -, whether it was on a bad day or good day, busy day or lazy day. Didn’t matter. Or how she would laugh at anything he said, even if the other boys didn’t find the joke very funny. How her lips were so goddamn pouty and soft after a nap. Even back then he had the urge to just kiss them. Silly of him to not realize any sooner how madly in love he was with this girl. “Okay!” she laughed. “I get it. I am awesome or whatever”. It was said more as a joke but honestly? He did think she was awesome. “Oh and, Ed?”. Now it was his turn to look at her quizzically. “I love you, too. And we will conquer this whole love thing. Together. You, me and … and them”. Tears were rushing out of his eyes uncontrollably as she spoke her words. She finished with a short silence, followed by a single word. “Teo”. At first, Edwin didn’t catch on but after repeating what she said in his head a couple of times, it finally clicked. “Yes, it’s definitely gonna be Teo”. This was truly a dream come true and neither her nor him wanted to ever wake up from it.

ANOTHER NOTE: ok so yes, she’s preggo and Teo is short for Mateo and that’s one of my favorite names, so I had to add it in here somehow. Anyways, if you actually read the whole thing: I love you.

- Cami

[avengerscompound]

The Unicorn - Chapter 20

The Unicorn:  A Pepperony Fanfic PREVIOUS

Series Masterlist

Buy me a coffee with Ko-fi Word Count:    1692

Pairing:  Tony Stark x F!Reader x Pepper Potts

Warnings:  pregnancy and baby talk

Synopsis:  Pepper has a freak out about how much more there is to do, and you and Tony set her mind at ease.

Chapter 20

The bed had been getting really crowded lately.  Both you and Pepper were now showing and you’d both started finding most sleeping positions awkward.  So body pillows had been purchased to help you both sleep.  Only you also both still wanted to spoon.  Which Tony was glad for, he liked that too, but it meant he woke up smothered in body pillows.

Not that he would ever complain.  He loved that he could now see that you were both pregnant.  Those two potbellies were a visual reminder that he was getting closer and closer to actually being a parent.  He could touch your stomach and even though he couldn’t feel them kicking yet, he knew they were in there and how close he was to them.

He was excited.   Yeah, there was still a lot to do, but that didn’t change the fact that he was excited.

He just really needed to pee right now and he didn’t know how to get untangled from the mess of limbs and pillows he was in and not wake you both up.

He tried to pull his arm out from under your neck and you shifted making a funny little whimpering sound and your eyes fluttered open.

“Sorry, honey.”  He said taking the opportunity to pull himself free from you, now you were awake.  “Go back to sleep.  I just need to pee.”

You grumbled and made room for him to get out and when he was free you moved back toward Pepper nuzzling in against her.  Tony dashed out and used the bathroom.  When he returned you were sitting up in bed.  Your brow was furrowed and you were holding a spot on the side of your stomach.

“What is it?”  He said, panic immediately setting in.  Thoughts going to miscarriage and losing the babies, and maybe even you.  He dashed over to the bed and climbed up next to you.

“Shh… Tony.”  You said gesturing to him to come closer.  “Tell me if you can feel this.”

He moved up next to you and you took his hand and placed it on your stomach.  He tilted his head to the side trying to feel something.  But it just felt normal.  Just your stomach.

“No…”  He said, dragging the word out a couple of beats as he focused on your stomach.

“Give it a minute.”  You said.

He waited, unsure what he was supposed to be feeling.  There had been a lot of false starts for him getting to feel the babies kicking.  You and Pepper had been able to feel them for a while now, but it was faint and anytime either of you had tried to get him to feel too, they just weren’t kicking hard enough for him to feel.  He was just about to shake his head and tell you that whatever it was he couldn’t feel it when something pushed against his hand.

“There!  That!”  You said.

Tony’s eyes lit up.  “Yes!  Was that them?  Are they kicking?”

You nodded enthusiastically.  “I was going to go back to sleep and then it felt like they were having a soccer match in there.  I thought I could feel it with my hand but I wasn’t sure.”

“Oh my god.”  He said and leaned in pressing his head to your stomach.  “Hey in there.  You guys are energetic this morning.”  He turned his head up to yours.  “Which one do you think it is?”

You shook your head. “I think it’s both of them.  I can feel it on both sides.  See.”  You moved his hand to the other side and after a few beats, there was another kick against his hand.

Tony started laughing and nuzzled in against your stomach.  “So full of beans.  Are you trying to burst out of there aliens style?”

“I think they must be.”  You said laughing.

Pepper stirred, grumbling as she opened her eyes.  “What’s going on.”  She said looking up at you both.

“The babies are kicking.”  You said.

“And Tony can feel them?”  She asked sitting up and putting her hand on your stomach.

“Yeah,”  You said, moving her hand and grinning at her.

“Oh my god!”  She squealed a moment later.  “They’re kicking so hard!  When will this one do that?”

“You’d think soon.  Maybe you’ve got the chill one like you and these two are just hyper Tony babies.”

Pepper laughed.  “Me?  Chill?”

Your laughter joined hers and you leaned over and kissed her.  “Yeah, you’re right.  I don’t know.  Soon I bet though.”

“I’m so excited.  I can’t believe we can feel them now.”  She said.

Tony hummed and rested his cheek against your baby bump as he reached over and ran his finger over Pepper’s stomach.  “It’s so good.”

“Why is it that every time we get a milestone I freak out about all the things we still need to do?”  Pepper said.

“Well, we have our doctor’s appointment tomorrow.  Then next week we go to Australia.  What else is the concern right now?”  You asked.

“Schools, things, birth plans,”  Pepper said.

“My birth plan is to cut those fuckers the fuck out of me.”  You said making Tony snort.

“Language in front of the children!”  Pepper said askance, leaning in and pressing her lips to your stomach.  “Don’t listen to your foul-mouthed mama.”

“What do you want for your birth plan then, mommy?”  Tony asked, tapping his fingers on her stomach.

“I don’t know.  I want it to be in a hospital…”

“Thank god,”  Tony said, making Pepper roll her eyes.

“But I don’t want it to be this super sterile thing.  I want it to be as natural as possible.”   She said.

“Shit, we’re having them here, right?  On-site?”  You asked.

“Uhh… yeah.  I guess I hadn’t really thought about it because this is where the doctor’s see us.”  Pepper said.

“Well we have a surgical room but we don’t really have a birthing room.  They aren’t the same thing.”  You said.

Tony sat up and grabbed his tablet.  “Okay.  Building a birthing suite.”  He said.

“For one baby, Tony?”  Pepper asked an edge of sarcasm to her voice.

“What’s the use being a multibillionaire if you can’t do things like that?”  He said.  “Besides, it’s on site, we can make it available to other agents and their families.  People are having kids more and more here.  It could even serve the area.  And what’s the alternative?  Choppering you into Cedars Sinai?  What if you don’t make it in time?”

“You can’t add, ‘design and build birthing suite’ to the things we have to do!  It’s too much.”  Pepper argued.

“I’ll delegate that obviously,”  Tony said patting her arm.  “Is the choppering you in the better option?”

Pepper huffed.  “No, I guess not.”

“So building it, it is.  I send it to the guys who did the med bay originally and Doctor Singh and they can work together to make something perfect.”

“Thank you, Tony.”  Pepper said and kissed his cheek.  He tilted his head and captured her lips, kissing her deeply.  “Anything for you.”  He said as he pulled back.

“So,”  You said.  “Medical but comfortable, minimal intervention.  That’s your plan right?”

Pepper chuckled.  “When has that ever been enough detail for me?”

“Right, but that’s the bones of it.  Say that to Doctor Singh tomorrow and make the plan with her.”  You said.

“Right.  You’re right.”  Pepper said, leaning back against the bed head.

“That’s right because I’m smart.”  You said.  “Now is there anything else we can figure out right now?”

“These two’s names?”  She said tapping your stomach.

You nodded and chewed your bottom lip.  “Alright.  So… Morgan is your Uncle.”  You said tapping her stomach.

“Right, yes.”  She agreed.

“Tony do you have any family you’d like to name one after?”  You asked.

Tony snorted.  “Me?  No.”  It was a knee jerk reaction aimed directly at his father.  You couldn’t pay him to name one of his kids after Howard.  Wakanda didn’t even have that kind of money.  Though, he guessed maybe Maria wasn’t so bad.  He wasn’t totally sold on the idea though, but if you were struggling to find one.

“What about Jarvis?”  Pepper suggested.

Tony stopped and blinked at her.  He’d named his first AI after the man who had really raised him.  Why not one of his children?  He deserved that kind of tribute considering how much of his own life he gave up to make sure Tony didn’t grow up completely neglected.  That there was someone there that he could count on.  Who did actually seem to love him unconditionally and didn’t have a long list of expectations to achieve.

“Yeah,”  Tony said with a nod.  “Yeah.  Naming him after Jarvis would be nice.  I think I’d like to do that.  We could name him Edwin.  Little Eddie.”

“There we go, that was easy.”  You said.  “Edwin and Morgan.  Two-thirds of the way there.”

“What about you, sweetie?”  Pepper asked.  “Do you have anyone you want to name one of them after?”

“I get the girl right?”  You asked.

Pepper stifled a laugh.  “Yeah.  The girl.”

“I want to name her after Ada Lovelace.”  You said.

Tony grinned and pulled you into a hug.  Naming his daughter after a woman who was one of the first computer programmers was genius.  Completely perfect.  “I love it.”

“Ada.  Morgan, Edwin, and Ada.  That’s really nice.  Yeah, let’s go with Ada.”  Pepper said.

“Look at that, and we solved a problem before we even got out of bed.”  You said and pecked them both on the cheek.  “And now I need to pee really bad.  So see ya.”  You jumped out of bed and started running to the bathroom.

“Oh god, me too!”  Pepper said and jumped out of bed and ran out of the room to use the bathroom down the hall.

Tony broke down in laughter.  The two pregnant people in the house at the same time did have some funny side effects he hadn’t even considered.  He rolled out of bed and padded out to the kitchen to get breakfast started.

// NEXT