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sharkboygirlish · 3 years

Text

Messy.

ONE-SHOT

Word count: 2793

Disclaimer: One piece and all it’s characters belong to Eiichiro Oda, I just like to write about them.

Warning: None

Rating: T (i guess?? there’s cursing)

Author’s Note: Whale, this is the first fanfic I’ve posted on the interwebs since high school so please keep that in mind, lol. I do plan to finish it sooner than later so check back in a few days if you want to read the rest, sorry I don’t have it all done right now. At long last it it FINISHED.

Feel free to tell me what u think! Unless it’s mean, then I ask that u keep those thoughts in ur noggin because I’m just writing these for fun not for grades.

Without further ado, here ya go.

Author’s Note pt 2: So i didn’t end up going the smut route like I originally planned, but I think it worked out better bc this one got nice and Emotional.

Summary: Zoro really shouldn’t agree to be Nami’s drinking partner if he wanted to keep their friendship from getting... Complicated.

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The moon was floating high in the night sky when Nami wandered onto the deck, unable to sleep even after a few hours of sketching.

She wanted company – specifically, she wanted the company of the crew’s resident alcoholic. It only took a few minutes to find him on the lawn deck with his back against a tree and his eye closed. ‘How typical.’

Nami smiled a small, excited smile as she strode over to him and squatted between his parted legs. An unconscious sigh left her nose as she swept her gaze up and down his face. She caught herself thinking, ‘He really is easy on the eyes isn’t he.’ ....again.

Who was she kidding? She’d been thinking the same thing every time she looked his way lately.

Two years ago she’d been able to keep the immature crush she had on him locked tightly away but somehow - it had gotten out and was slowly consuming her entire being.

Nami hoped he hadn’t noticed how often she invited him to drink with her because she didn’t think she could handle being rejected. So she settled for spending time alone with him whenever and however she could.

“Hey, moss-head,” the navigator said finally, leaning in to squint at him, “Are you asleep?”

He had literally just settled down for a nice cat nap when the navigator appeared suddenly to interrupt him. ‘Damn. What the hell did she want now?’

Instead of answering, Zoro chose to ignore her and pretend like he was deep asleep. ‘Why won’t she go bother someone else?’

Nami started prodding his cheek with one finger to rouse him if he really was sleeping, ”Zorooo wake up, I wanna drink,” she whined and his eyelid opened instantly.

‘Why’s she so damn pretty..’ was the first thought he had when he realized that she was a lot closer than he’d anticipated.

He mentally chastised himself after, trying to remind his id that Nami had never once indicated that she wanted to be anything other than friends and he should respect that.

But… There was no harm in looking from time to time was there? And she was pretty. She’d always been... ‘Oh for fuck’s sake, now he sounded like Sanji. He needed to get a grip.’

“Helloooooo,” Nami waved her hand in Zoro’s face until he snapped back to reality and snatched her wrist up, pulling it away. He scowled but it wasn’t deep, and now he was refusing to look her in the eye. “What was that about, huh Zoro?”

“Nothing.” The swordsman replied perhaps a little too quickly to avoid suspicion, “Thought I heard a noise, doesn’t matter – oi, didn’t you want to do something?”

He couldn’t remember what exactly it was. He’d been so distracted by the way her bangs framed her face and sometimes got caught in her eyelashes—’Damnit! He was doing it again.’

Nami smirked again but didn’t press the subject anymore. She’d do that later once they started drinking. “Weren’t you listening to me? You’re so rude, maybe I should find someone else to share my booze with.”

Was it a good idea to go drink with Nami when he kept catching himself thinking about feelings that he’d been suppressing for the last two years? Probably not…

But he couldn’t just decline an opportunity to get buzzed. ‘And... Maybe he wanted to get buzzed with Nami, specifically.’

Zoro scoffed, mostly at himself. “Quit playing games, damnit, do you want me to drink with you or not?”

“You’re so stubborn,” The navigator teased with a pleased smile that made his heart beat unevenly, “I could care less if you join me, but you’re not allowed to come unless you say you’ll be nice.”

“Nami. I am older than you, quit treating me like a fucking child or I swear-”

“That’s no way to talk to a lady who’s getting you drunk for free, Roronoa Zoro. If you can’t be nice then I’ll just add the cost of everything you drink to your debt and-”

Zoro didn’t have time to ruminate over the way hearing her say his full name made him shiver because he had to shut her up before she did charge him.

“Okay, okay. I’ll be... nice.” He hissed through gritted teeth and her answering giggle made his pulse flutter. He had to fight to keep himself from smiling. ‘What the hell was going on with him tonight? Was he sick?’

“Good boy,” she turned and started walking towards the Sunny’s aquarium bar, glancing back over her shoulder to make sure he was coming.

“Don’t push your luck, woman.” Zoro snarled to mask his confusion over the sudden need to touch her that he felt scratching at the back of his head. He really shouldn’t agree to be Nami’s drinking partner if he wanted to keep their friendship from getting... Complicated.

He knew it, but he followed her up the stairs all the same.

* * *

“Why d’you always want to drink with me anyway, witch?” Skeptical of her intentions, his narrowed eye fixed itself on Nami as she approached him holding two maroon tinted bottles. She offered one to him and he accepted it – but he didn’t let his guard down yet.

Zoro lowered his gaze to check the label out, whistling long and low when he read 23% alcohol per volume. A couple puzzle pieces clicked together in his head ‘Oh, that’s why. Because if she tried to drink this with anyone else they’d pass out after two glasses.’

“Would you believe that I just like hanging out with you?” Though her tone was teasing she was actually being genuine, she had a lot of fun with him whenever they went out.

“No–“ He paused when Nami kicked him in the shin hard enough to make him swear. Reaching down with his free hand he rubbed the sore patch of skin and glared daggers at his crewmate. “What the fuck was that for?!”

“You said you’d be nice, Zoro! So be nice or I’ll charge you a hundred thousand beris for that bottle.” Nami uncorked hers but waited to hand the corkscrew over until he behaved himself. The look he was giving her would probably frighten a small child but she didn’t flinch.

‘This was his choice.’ He reminded himself. Of his own free will he chose to get drunk with Nami instead of napping, and that meant dealing with her bossiness no matter how much he loathed it. ‘Sometimes he just wanted to grab her by the shoulders and make her shut up, there were better things her mouth could be doing anyway-‘

“Why do you keep staring at me like that, do I have a zit or something?”

Zoro sat up so fast that he banged his shoulder on the underside of the countertop. ‘What the hell was that? What the hell was wrong with him?’ He hadn’t even opened the damn bottle and he was already making himself look like an idiot.

“No,” the swordsman grumbled, wracking his brain for a believable excuse, “Just thinking about how I’ll owe you money even after I’m dead if you keep charging me for bullshit.” That made her laugh and Zoro cursed himself for how much he liked hearing it. “Don’t see how it’s funny for me, witch.”

Nami let him take the corkscrew from her, eyes crinkled with amusement while he opened his bottle. “You’ll just have to stay alive until you pay me back in full, I guess!” She trilled before taking a long, heavy drink from hers.

“Yeah?” Zoro snorted before mimicking her and downing about half of the wine in the container. It tasted disgusting, which he’d expected, but that didn’t make the bitter aftertaste any less miserable. His nose wrinkled slightly as he set the bottle down. “I bet even if I did try to pay you off you’d find a way to charge me more.”

“You make me sound so heartless,” the navigator batted her eyelashes innocently, pretending to look hurt, “Why would I ever do such a thing?”

“Hah.” He scoffed before chugging some more wine and failing to keep track of how much he was drinking each time. “Because you want to keep me on a leash since I don’t throw myself at you like that dumbass cook.”

An impish smirk crawled it’s way onto Nami’s face that made him immediately regret what he’d just said. ‘Fuck. Damnit!’

“So…” She began slowly, savoring every second that the swordsman spent avoiding direct eye contact with her, “You admit that you are one of my lap dogs?”

A muscle in his jaw flexed and he stopped drinking for one second to grunt, “That’s not what I said.”

“That’s what I heard!” Chimed Nami as she rose from her seat, stepping over to Zoro and tracing a finger under his jaw while he drained the last few drops of liquid. “I should get you a collar, so people know who to bring you to when you get lost.”

Normally he would have snapped at her for poking fun at his sense, or lack thereof, direction but he wasn’t listening to her. She’d come close enough for him to pick up her scent and maybe it was the alcohol intensifying his feelings, but it was suffocating him in a good way.

He loved the way she smelled. Tangerines from her soaps mixed with salty seawater and traces of sunscreen. A hint of orange blossom, but only when she was close to him like this.

Zoro inhaled deeply through his nose and, without realizing it, his expression melted into something affectionate and gentle. ‘In two years she’d changed in so many different ways… but she still smelled the same. She still smelled like home.’

* * *

“What are you thinking about, Zoro?” Her voice void of it’s usual teasing tone, Nami’s curiosity was piqued by his sudden shift in demeanor. He looked soft and peaceful, like he didn’t have anything to worry about. She wanted to know why.

‘Ah, fuck.’ What was he supposed to tell her? That he was thinking about how good she smelled? ‘Yeah right.’ Zoro was quiet for a while, mulling over his words until he came up with an explanation that didn’t sound as creepy – but also wasn’t a lie.

“I guess..” he finally murmured, his gaze shifting to meet hers, “It’s just been a while and… I was thinking about how nice it feels to be back here, with everyone…” a brief pause then he added, “I missed you guys.” ‘Look at him being all gushy and emotional, this wine really was something else.’ Zoro reached to brush his fingertips by her temple, catching a stray lock of hair and tucking it behind her ear, “I missed you.”

When had Zoro ever been this honest with her about the way he felt? Never was the answer, but now he seemed to trust her well enough to know she wouldn’t spill his secrets. Nami took his face in both of her hands, surprising him, and pulled his head down so she could kiss his forehead. “I missed you too, Zoro.”

Something about hearing her say that she’d missed him too broke a dam in his chest that he’d been trying to keep together for two years. Hormoness flooded through his bloodstream quicker than Zoro could even process them and before he knew it he was practically throwing his arms around Nami’s waist and crushing her against his chest.

“Nami—” he pressed his face into her neck to hide the tears that he couldn’t hold back anymore. Sober he might have cared about losing it like this around her but she was here and… ‘He just – needed to hold her.’ Hold her and smell her and feel how real she was because she had almost been taken from him.

‘He’d barely begun to process what he had been through on Thriller Bark when they were attacked in Sabaody. If he tried to think back on it his memories would get hazy and his bones would ache from their very cores. He knew what had happened but it’s like his brain was protecting him from understanding how close to death he’d come. Then – to be torn away from the people he loved with all of his heart? Who he had just nearly killed himself to protect?

It had ripped him apart and rubbed salt into every wound. And it fucking hurt. The same kind of pain he felt when he saw Kuina dead on the floor of their dojo. He was scared, he was furious, he was devastated – all over again but this time it was so much worse. So, so much worse.

That was why he had trained so hard over the last two years. Because he couldn’t bear the grief that came with loving them so deeply – so he got stronger. And stronger. And stronger. No matter the cost to his body, he would become powerful enough to defeat anyone who crossed them. Then… He would never have to feel the agony that he did when he first woke up on Kuraigana Island ever again.

Taking on all of Luffy’s suffering in Thriller Bark had been the most physically painful experience of his entire life – but that was nothing compared to how much it hurt to think that his friends were gone forever, that he hadn’t been able to protect them.

Training made it easy not to think about what had happened -- but now he was home, and they were safe - and he was realizing just how close he’d come to losing all of them. At once. And he could do nothing to stop it.’

Startled by him grabbing her, Nami was prepared to give the pirate a good smack if he was getting handsy but… He started trembling. ‘Was he not feeling well?’ Her mouth opened to form the question then stopped. His breathing hitched while his entire body jerked and she realized…

‘Zoro was crying.’

Roronoa Zoro, who prided himself on his strength, was sobbing wretchedly into her neck. ‘He must have been holding this in since Sabaody.’ Nami’s heart ached for him and his stupid pride that forced him to torture himself instead of letting him cry like he needed to. She’d been expecting him to crash at some point, how couldn’t he? Even someone as strong as Zoro was still a human being.

One of her arms cradled his head while the other wound round his shoulders, her fingers combing gently through his hair. “Oh you sweet, sweet boy…” she spoke in the tone that Bellemere used to use when Nami and Nojiko were frightened by a passing thunderstorm. It always calmed her, maybe it would calm Zoro, too.

‘Quit fucking crying you loser you’re supposed to be a man.’ But he couldn’t, he literally could not stop because he was trying to. “I wasn’t strong enough,” his voice quivered at the edges and he hated it. ‘He was definitely never going to drink this kind of wine again ever. Not if it turned him into a blubbering mess like this every time.’

“Shhh, no. No. Don’t you dare try to blame yourself for what happened. Hey, look at me.” Nami urged his head off her shoulder and cupped his face in both of her palms, “None of us were strong enough, okay? Not even Luffy.” Each tear that fell she tenderly swept away with the pad of her thumb. The corner of her mouth turned up as she assured him, “But we are strong enough now. We can take care of each other. Nothing is ever going to tear us apart again, Zoro.”

‘She was right. Of course, she was right. He needed to have faith in his crewmates and his captain. They could do anything as long as they had each other.’ His breathing slowly evened out as he focused on anchoring himself back to reality. He wasn’t in Sabaody or Kuraigana – he was on the Sunny. In the bar, with Nami who had grown so much since he last saw her. The look in his eye softened like it had before his breakdown.

“You’re staring at me again, Zoro.” The navigator teased, her hands falling to rest on his shoulders. He hadn’t let go of her yet but she didn’t mind, he could hold on to her for as long as he needed.

A ghost of his usual smirk passed across his face. “Sorry, Nami…” Zoro took a little risk by leaning in to press a chaste but lingering kiss to her cheek, then traced a path with the edge of his nose to her ear, murmuring, “Wine makes me a little… Messy.”

#zona #zonami #zoro x nami #zona one-shots #zoro nami fanfiction #zonalove #zoro x nami fanfic

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non-stop-imagines · 3 years

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The Man with the Metal Arm (Part 13)

Here’s Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Black!Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: Cute, slightly suggestive, mention of ex, plot thickens

A/N: Heeyyyy, how y'all doin?? 😎 I know it’s been more than a while since I have written, and I apolagize for that. School, as always, got me all the way fucked up, luckily summer courses have started which are shorter and (for me) all online soooo. Also my 21st b-day is coming 🥳 so you know I’m excited for that. Anyway, I started writing this like half way through TFATWS bc Bucky with personality was good inspiration. Anyway, hope y’all enjoy. Love you all!💛❤️💛❤️💛

Man with the Metal Arm TAGS LIST: @storibambino @cutiepiemimi13 @this-chan @elaindeereads @letsshamelessqueen-m @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @shakzer00 @lahjatheblackbrat

UNIVERSAL TAGS LIST: @beautifulwisdom2001 @thottio @jetaimeamore @mixedfandxms @here-for-your-bullshit

Requests are Closed, if you want to be added to the tags list for this series or wrting with Bucky in general, just ask.

Masterlist

A couple weeks later you find yourself moving around your place, picking up dishes here, wiping off a surface there, moving to the music of your 60s Playlist that played to the lone earphone in your right ear. Louise was taking a nap in her room and has been since 4 that afternoon. It was now 6 pm. Were you gonna regret it later when all she'll want to do is play or watch a movie or dance to music at 11 pm? Possibly. But right now all you know is that the house was quiet, everyone you know and love are safe, and tomorrow was one of the few Saturdays you had off and all you were planning to do was watch TV in either the comfy pajamas you own or in your underwear. You still had to choose, and maybe you could just have Peter watch Lou. If so you should text him now. Your thoughts began to drift, wondering if May would be there to help Peter, wondering if you could plan some sort of day out with her and Imani soon, but the thoughts were brought to an abrupt halt when you hear a knock at the door. You quickly move over to look out the peephole, swiftly pulling back to open the door when you see that it's Bucky.

"Hey, how are you doing today?" Bucky chuckles as you jump into his arms, squeezing his neck in a tight hug. "Woah there, we just talked last night."

"Yeah, but I haven't had affectionate contact, or any physical contact for that matter, from the man that I love for 3 weeks. I'm touch starved, you can’t blame me.” You speak into his neck, taking hefty sniffs of the cologne you love so much and rubbing your face on his few day old stubble. Bucky continues to hold onto your clinging body as he takes a few steps inside your place to close the door.

“Fine, I guess. Where’s Louise?” Bucky sets you down and lightly pulls at a few coils that stuck out of your pulled back puff as you continue to rub at the stubble that adorned his face and study his tired eyes. He always looked tired, even if he had a full night's sleep.

“Taking a nap.” He cocks an eyebrow at your word with unsaid concern. “I know she’ll be up all night, but I’ve gotten so much done.” You whine, gesturing to the kitchen. That doesn’t stop Bucky from looking around the entrance and the living room, which is currently slightly cluttered with Lou’s toys and coloring apparatuses. “I know, I’m not working as fast as I should be, I may have taken a couple short naps here and there.” Bucky just sighs and gives you a lingering peck on the forehead before moving around you to start picking up toys.

“What are you doing for dinner?” Bucky stands and turns to look at you, stretching and groaning as he does.

“I ordered pizza.” You smile, rubbing his jaw as you head back to the kitchen.

Right as Bucky closed the door after accepting the pizza from the delivery person, almost as if it was staged, a small voice came from the door of Lou’s room.

“Do we get pi- BUCKY!” The little girl with her hair still askew, sprints to Bucky and clings onto his right leg.

“Woah there, Puff. Let me set this down first.” You watch through the pass-through from the kitchen as Bucky limps over to the living room table. “What is it with you and your mom and clinging to me today.” A squealing giggle is earned from his comment before he finally sets the pizza down, swiftly picking up Lou in return and swinging her around.

“Is Uncle Steve and Uncle Sam coming, too?” Lou runs her little hands through Bucky’s hair as Bucky’s eyes met yours before he made a choice decision.

“Uh, no. I thought it could just be you, me and your mom.” Lou’s hands stop what they’re doing and Bucky watches as tears well up in her eyes. The next moment consisted of a hard toddler yank to Bucky’s hair, that had you running in to pull her off of him and setting her on the ground.

“What in the world, was that?” Your voice was stern, but it wasn’t a yell, and it definitely held your four year old’s attention.

“I want to see Uncle Sam and Uncle Steve.” Lou inexpertly crosses her arms and scrunches her face. The attitude doesn’t go fully unchecked when you change your stance to match hers, shifting your weight to one side and crossing your arms, but instead your face sported a cocked eyebrow.

“Fix your tone, little girl.” Silence rests between the two of you, with Bucky standing off to the side, not knowing what to do. “Now,” you squat down at first to meet your daughter's eyeline, but when your knees begin to fail on you, you go for a straight kneel before you continue. “I know you like when Steve and Sam come around. They are a lot of fun aren’t they?” Your question receives a small head nod which allows you to continue. “Your Uncle Steve and Uncle Sam love you very much, but they can’t always be here. I will see if they can come over soon, but you cannot do this again. When you want something, you ask nicely, and if you can’t have what you want right now, what you just did is a no-no. Now apologize to Bucky for pulling his hair.”

“Sorry Bucky.” Lou’s voice trembles as she walks over to Bucky. He picks her up onto his hip and hugs her close after using his unoccupied hand to help you up off the ground.

“Hey, kiddo. It’s okay. I’m fine.” Bucky’s calm voice soothes her before the crying even starts.

“Hey, let me take her. Can you go get some plates?” Bucky nods and hands Louise off, but fluffs her hair once before he goes to get the plates. “I love you, babygirl. So much.” You bring her close to kiss and take a whiff of her scent that honestly hasn’t changed since she was born. “You want some pizza?” Lou nods lightly so you set her down on the couch and head back the kitchen to get everyone something to drink, right as Bucky comes back with the plates. “Show Bucky what piece you want.”

A couple hours later, two empty pizza boxes laid empty on the table and a tired four year old layed asleep with her head on Bucky’s thigh and her feet occasionally kicking you. “Thirteen hours of labor and this is the thanks I get.” You grumble under your breath after receiving one last kick before standing up to clean the dinner dishes. You take one last look at Bucky and his loving gaze on your daughter before heading back to the kitchen. As you put the cups in the sink you laugh at the devious thankfulness you have for your daughter's temper tantrum and crying earlier because that never fails to knock her out and hopefully her circadian rhythm will take over.

“I’m gonna go put her down.” You jump out of your thoughts when you hear Bucky’s voice behind you at the entrance of the kitchen. “Oh, sorry.”

“No, it’s fine. I was just, in my head.” You shake the water off your hands and turn around. “Uh, yeah. Go ahead and put her down, if you don’t mind.”

“No, not at all. Uh, do you want me to wrap her hair?” He gently adjusts her on his hip, freezing when she shifted in her sleep.

“Nah, not necessary. It might wake her up, and I don’t want her to wake up. I might regret this choice later but right now, I don’t care.” You finish your spiel with your lightly bubble covered hand against the counter behind you. Bucky just slowly nods and heads back to your daughter’s bedroom.

Fifteen minutes later, you found yourself in your room, quietly making out with your boyfriend. He sat on the foot of your bed, hands gripping your ass as your tongues fervently danced together. Once the moment to come up for air came, you took that opportunity to push Bucky back onto the bed, and then sent a welcomed attack on his lips that had him pulling you closer than what would be considered humanly possible. After some time, his lips moved down to your neck, the scratch of his facial hair sending goosebumps all over your body.

“Ah, James…” The words quietly drip from your mouth, and the vibration from his chuckled response causes you to moan quietly.

“Oh, it’s James now. Okay.” His right hand begin to trail up and down your torso, gently lifting your shirt until its finally up over your head. He flips the two of you over and sits back on his heels to get a look at you. “Say my name again. Please.” His voice is deep, sultry, and you watch as he slowly gets up from the bed and move to the foot of the bed, lightly griping your leggings.

“James.” Your words start Bucky’s removal of you pants, hooded eyes keeping your gaze on his, but after a few seconds the removal stops.

“Again.” You do as told and he continues, slowly pulling at leggings with help from you shimmying. This repeating continued until your pants are finally off, but a small detail that Bucky didn't pay attention to was how your words began to slur together and fade off, and how your shimmies became less vigorous, so by the time Bucky had removed his own shirt and pants, all he saw when he looked up was you asleep, head fallen to the side and a small amount of drool already escaping from your mouth. “She did seem pretty tired.” Bucky goes into the top right drawer of dresser to get one of your big night shirts then reaching into the adjacent drawer filled with his own items that he brings over whenever he stays the night for a pair of pajama pants. He pulls on your night shirt for you and tries his best to tie on your scarf before finally climbing into bed next to you, pulling you into his body before finally falling asleep.

Lou’s little feet pad along the wooden floor, first to your side of the bed to attempt to wake you up, but when the effort led to a fruitless reward, she moves over to where Bucky was laying.

"Bucky." Lou begins to shake at his back which was currently facing her direction, and once she sees him stir slightly she continues. "Bucky, wake up Bucky." She climbs into the bed and sits on her tucked under legs and starts to play with his hair again. He got a rather drastic hair cut a week ago, and she's just been trying to familiarize herself with the style. The light touch of her fingers and the sing-songy way say repeated his name eventually had him awake enough to flip over and look at her.

"What's up, Puff?" He wraps an arm around her as she pushes the Rouge hairs on his forehead out of his face.

"I'm hungry." Her focus still on Bucky’s forehead.

"What time is it?" Bucky tries his hardest to stall fully getting out of bed, but deep down he knew it was a frivolous effort.

"Time for breakfast." She now begins to lightly tap out a beat on Bucky's head, so he answers quickly to get it to stop.

"Okay, okay. Go turn on something for us to watch. I'll be out there in a second." The child immediately leaped of the bed and ran to the living room, giving Bucky room to look at his phone on his night stand for the time. 6:00 am. He slowly makes his way out of the bed, pulling on his shirt that was still sprawled out on the floor and heads out to the kitchen to start breakfast, but not before giving you a light peck on the forehead.

Your internal alarm clock had you stretching and reaching for your phone at 8:45 am. It just so happened that as you scrolled through your notifications, eyeing texts from Imani and Sherry about their dates with Steve and Sam respectively, you nose catches a whiff a heavenly smelling breakfast, and the equally heavenly sound of both Louise’s and Bucky’s laughter from outside your bedroom door. So after going through and responding to said texts, you get up and pull some shorts on under your nightshirt and head out to the kitchen.

"Hi, mommy! Me and Bucky are making breakfast." Lou's little head pops out from around Bucky’s torso. “He let me pour the waffle dough.”

“It’s called batter, Puff.” Bucky turns his head to smile at you. “Morning.”

“Morning.” You walk over and lightly kiss his lips then look over his shoulder to see the waffle iron closed and steaming. “Be careful, baby.” You feel your child’s, now daunting, curls, and watch them bounce as she nods to display that she was listening.

“Hey, we should go on a date tonight.” You blink from behind the refrigerator door, watching as Bucky unknowingly lifts Lou off of the step stool and moves the waffle iron next to the sink but back toward the backsplash.

“Uh… okay. Where did this come from?” You grab orange juice from the fridge and close the door, reaching in the upper cabinets to grab cups.

“It would be a redo of our first date.” You totally forgot the night was cut short due to Louise being sick. The part of the date that had occurred was nice, and having him there to help you was also great, but it did suck that a whole portion of the night had to be cut.

“Oh yeah. Well, uhh, if you have something in mind, I just have to see if I can get someone to babysit at such short notice.” You finally sit down at the table with your plate filled with a waffle, a couple pieces of bacon and some eggs.

“Well, I can tell you that Imani and your other friend, uh-ah-Sherry, yeah, they won’t be available.” You look up from scrolling through you phone with a playfully cocked eyebrow.

“And you know this how?” You take a bite of waffle, eagerly awaiting his answer.

“Well, Sam is still trying to woo Sherry, and apparently,” He raises his hands in defense before continuing. “Apparently, Imani has been keeping Steve very busy.” You nearly choke on the waffle your were chewing on trying to stifle your laugh, but the noise and the subject at hand earned your daughters attention from the living room.

"Do I get to see Uncle Steve and Uncle Sam today?!" Her question came out as an excited squealing as she whipped her head back to look at you two.

"Uh, no, babygirl. Not today, but you might be able to hang out with Peter. How does that sound?” You watch as a bright smile spreads across your daughters face and her curls begin to bounce as she hops up from her spot at the coffee table.

“Peter! Yay Peter! My boyfriend!” You and Bucky both stop and look at each other, stifling your laughs.

“You like Peter, huh?” You finish your text asking Peter of he’s free to babysit tonight, and take another bite of waffle.

“Yeah, he’s my bestfriend!” You nod, still holding in a chuckle as Louise smiles brightly.

At that moment you receive a text back from Peter:

Peter Parker (Babysitter):

I would love to watch Louise tonight! I just have some homework to do that I can do while I watch her. But is it ok if I come over there to watch her? May has a date tonight.

Perfect, now you don't have to take Lou there then come back and you can just leave from your place instead. You answered Peter confirming plans and then look back up at Bucky. "Wait, where exactly are we going? I haven't seen you make any reservations recently." You finally place your phone down to finish your breakfast.

"We won't need them." He just give you a toothy grin as he gets up from his seat to clean up his spot. Then you watch him with your signature cocked eyebrow as he comes around to give you a kiss on your scarved hair. "Always so skeptical."

"Fine then Mr. 'I Got This', what should I wear to this date that you got all planned out?" You get up from your spot to clean your dishes and Bucky heads to the living room to say bye to Louise. He thinks for a second before answering.

"Remember the outfit you wore when we took Louise to the giant Toys R Us? The outfit with the cardigan and the jeans?" You nod from your spot as you continue cleaning dishes. "Something like that, kinda casual."

"Well, thank you for being so specific." He nods and finally gets to Louise, whose focus was being held by Saturday morning cartoons, in this case it was Looney Toons.

"Hey, Puff. I'm heading out but I'll be back tonight to take your Mommy out, okay?" He picks her up so she could be at eyeline with him.

"Okay. Where are you taking her?" Lou's hands wander back to Bucky's hair, the little hands rubbing at the short hair bringing Bucky a sort of peace.

"It's a surprise. But I'll tell you all about it right after, promise." Lou nods at Bucky's words then gives him a kiss on the cheek goodbye, that being Bucky's cue to set her back down. "Alright, I'll be back to pick you up around 7, alright?" Bucky's keys jingle as he pulls his shoes back on.

"Okie dokie, love you." You speak to him from the sink thought the pass through.

"Love you too. Both of you." And with these words he leaves, leaving a hopeful feeling for tonight's festivities.

It was now 6:30, and you were still stationed in the bathroom, a bit past starting your make up.

"Ms. Y/L/N, can Louise have some ice cream? She keeps asking and I just wanted to check." Peter pops his head into the bathroom. "You look very nice by the way."

"Thank you, Peter. Um, has she eaten all of her dinner yet?" You go back to dusting some shimmery maroon eyeshadow along your eyelid.

"Well, it looks like it, but I have an odd suspicion that she hid her broccoli." Peter responds, still only having his head poked into the bathroom, holding onto the door frame.

"She would do that." You sigh, giving your eyes and hand a break. "Lightly grill her to make sure she did eat her broccoli. If she did actually eat her broccoli, then yeah she can have ice cream. 2 scoops."

"And if she didn't eat the broccoli?" Peter's face contorted to a questioning expression.

"Hold out on he a bit. She'll crack and eat the vegetables. Then you can give her some. Have you had anything to eat? Dinner or anything?" You go back to swiping on eyeshadow, now a deeper brown color.

"I got a small pack of powdered donuts before I got here, but I really haven't had anything since lunch." You stop again watch look at him, chuckling as he begins to cower under your gaze.

"Peter, go eat some food. Fridge is open to you, okay? I don't want you starving while you're over here." You take glances back at him using the mirror, smirking at the smile growing on his face.

"Okay, I will. Thank you Ms. Y/L/N." Peter's head finally disappears from the door frame and you hear the boy questioning your four year old, knowing either way he will most likely just give her ice cream.

Eventually 6:30 became 6:55 and you found yourself fixing little bits of your appearance in your full length mirror, checking out your outfit, which comprised of a dark brown cardigan, a basic flowy white t-shirt, leggings and black calf high boots. "This is gonna have to be casual enough." Just as you speak to yourself in the mirror, you faintly here the knock at the door and Peter letting Bucky in.

"Hey, Peter. Thanks for watching Louise tonight." Bucky keeps his attention on Peter as he limps over to the couch with a squealing four year old clung to his leg.

"Oh, it's no problem at all. I love watching her." They both look towards your room when you ask for a couple more minutes then go back to their conversation. "Um, I actually have a question for you, if you don't mind?"

"Kid, I am not helping you with your history homework again. Don't you have the inter-" Bucky begins to rant before being cutoff by a now more nervous Peter.

"No, I actually was wondering if you could help me with this girl at school. You know getting her to notice me." Bucky just cocks a curious eyebrow at him and he continues. "Well, when you and Ms. Y/L/N started dating you weren't t-the most approachable, ya know,"

"Thin ice, kid." Bucky has now put some of his attention into helping Louise color a page in her coloring book.

"S-sorry, it's just, I was wondering, well, hoping you had some pointers to help me talk to her." Bucky hadn't noticed until now that Peter has moved to the other end of the couch which wasn't far from where he sat but the increased distance was noticeable, so be took a breath and gave his advice.

"Don't overthink it, and stay relaxed. That's really all the advice I can give because Louise is the only reason I got the opportunity to talk to Y/N. So, yeah…" Bucky's eyebrows furrow when he sees Peter frantically typing into his phone, about to ask what it was, that was until you exclaim your emergence from your room.

"Ta-da! This casual enough?" You hold out your arms and quickly step to turned around, displaying not only your outfit, but your dangly "diamond" earrings, and your hair, currently in its natural form but done up a bit.

"Perfect. Absolutely perfect." Bucky walks over to you with his arms open and give you a light kiss while gently pulling you towards him by your upper arms. While he was coming towards you, you got a glance of his outfit, dark jeans, burgundy quarter sleeve henley, and leather jacket, a common combination for him that he wore so we'll.

"Well you look great too. Shall we get going?" You go over to the pass though to grab your purse and then the living room to give Louise one last kiss. "Be good for Peter. Love you, babydoll."

"Yes ma'am, love you too mommy." She grabs your face with her little hands to pull you in for another kiss, and then goes back to coloring. "Thank you again Peter. We should be back around 11:30."

"Okay. Bye Ms. Y/L/N. Bye uh- Mr- B- uh…" Peter frantically looks back and forth between the two of you, and you just stifle a laugh and look towards Bucky.

"It's just Bucky kid. We've been over this." He leads you out the door by the small of your back. "Have fun you two." Finally, you and Bucky were out the door and off to the mystery date location.

"So you having fun?" Bucky asks as you two sway back and forth, slow dancing to the music of an acoustic guitar being played on the stage of a small amphitheater-like area decorated for a date night event.

"Who knew eating a box of pizza in the car and then slow dancing in Central Park would be so romantic.?" You lift your head from Bucky's chest to scan his face, admiring how soft he looks in the light glow of the twinkle lights above. "I like your hair like this." You run your finger up and though his short hair, scratching his scalp and eliciting a deep groan from him.

"You did that on purpose." A mischievous grin grows on his face as his grip tightens slightly around your waist, one hand beings to slip down to grip your butt. "I will not hesitate to bring you back to the car. You owe me from last night anyway." You playfully hit his arms, making him laugh then go to kiss your nose.

"I was tired. You can't blame me, blame my severely messed up circadian rhythm." You giggle your last few words due to the tickle of Bucky's stubble on your neck as he begins to sprinkle kisses up and down.

"You smell good. You always smell good." His kissed being to move along your jaw.

"You have never smelled me after a 12 hour shift, huh?" Bucky's lips finally reach yours, starting with light pecks and ending with deep passionate kisses boarding on inappropriate frenching.

"Woah there, I'm sure you could take this party somewhere more private. Thinking about it, you weren't one to be very modest were you?" That voice. You know that voice. You hate that voice. No, it can't be.

"Trevor." Is all you say, not looking to the man standing a few feet from you and Bucky, seeming to be with someone.

"You know this guy?" You can tell by his voice that Bucky was on edge, hugging you close to him and turning you away.

"Unfortunately. Bucky, this is my uh- ex-husband."

#black reader #marvel imagine #marvel #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x black!reader #bucky imagine #peter parker #james barnes x black!reader #james barnes imagine

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masonscig · 3 years

Text

i like it when you sleep

pairing | mason x sofía

word count | 2.2k

warnings | mention of anxiety, and general murphy nightmares. shameless smut. minors dni

author’s note | had an idea last night and was possessed by some kinda writing gods so here u go! my prompt fill for day five of hot in wayhaven, temperature. this is set sometime in the future where they’re not official and not living together, but they’re a lot more comfortable w each other – idk what book they’re gonna get together so have this vague scene mwah (i have not proofread this so enjoy the mess) also THIS TITLE IS SO LAST MINUTE SJDFJKKDFJ bc of that one song by the 1975 with a full sentence title that is v them

•─────────────────•

She hasn’t had vivid dreams in a long time, and she’s not sure if she likes it that way or not.

Her dreams are just vague sensations with colors and shapes that never fully form, sometimes comforting ones that guide her through the night till she naturally wakes.

Other times, the creeping anxiety’s broken her into a cold sweat till she jumps awake, left with the distant feeling of Murphy’s fangs deep in her throat, her scar throbbing, the skin there hot.

Tonight’s one of those nights where she’s already woken up panting after outrunning something without a face or distinct features.

The room’s stifling already, but the air conditioning is on full blast. The old system isn’t nearly strong enough to cool down the apartment to her liking.

She shifts under the sheets again, trying to find a cool patch on the bed.

Can’t get comfortable. Can’t cool down. Can’t sleep.

She rolls onto her back, tracing lines from bump to bump on the popcorn ceiling. Her eyes are dried and each blink is scratchier than the last. Her lids are heavy, but her brain’s fighting sleep.

Mason’s next to her, arms folded behind his head, face gentle – his snores are soft and followed by sighs. He’s at his most peaceful like this.

Grabbing the cup of ice water from her nightstand, she takes a few refreshing gulps, tracing her fingers through the condensation on the outside of it, before tapping her cold fingertips to her cheeks.

There’s not much she can do besides lie there until her brain stops working overtime. Maybe then she’ll slip into the dreamless sleep she so desperately wants.

“Sofía?” He rasps groggily, his voice crackling.

It still gets her when he uses her name so casually.

“I can’t sleep,” she smiles weakly, making no move to curl up to his side.

“Didn’t you take some of that sleep shit before you laid down?” He asks, peering at her through a squinted eye, the other one squeezed shut.

It’s true she’s relied on sleep aids for a long time – but something about this summer’s made her immune to them. The drops she puts in the glass of water she chugs before bed are completely ineffective.

“I guess they just stopped working.”

Mason frowns, kicking the sheets off his legs. He’s wearing the soft shorts she bought him, the ones she picked because she knew the fabric wouldn’t make him want to claw his skin off.

“Did I wake you up?” She asks, rolling onto her side. She shakes her bangs away, brows furrowed.

He shrugs. “Not your fault. It doesn’t take much to get me up anyway.”

“It was the fucking water… I was drinking too loudly,” she murmurs, propping her head up with one hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Nah, I’ve got my fill. I’m rested.” A soft smile tugs at one side of his mouth. “Thanks for letting me crash here.”

“You’re always welcome here. You know that.”

He rolls his eyes. “I don’t say thanks often, and when I do it goes unnoticed.” He stretches, the taut muscle rolling beneath his freckled skin.

Her eyes widen. “Oh wow, you really did. Four leaf clover moment.”

He shifts so that he’s on his side, too, inches away from her. “Nothin’ lucky about me.”

“Now’s the part where you say ‘I’m lucky to know you, Sofía’,” she jokes, squishing his cheeks together with her free hand, his brow quirked while she’s tugging his jaw open and closed.

“That’s a given, sweetheart.”

Closing the gap between them with a grin, she presses a kiss to his parted lips, giggling when he darts his tongue out to lick her.

“You’re so annoying,” she laughs, trying to roll away from him, but he just wraps his arms around her, nuzzling his nose into her neck.

“Don’t I know it.”

They spoon for a little while (she’s not sure how long), the ceiling fan whirring above them, the grasshoppers chirping relentlessly outside of her window.

The sweat’s still coming, even more so now that she’s cuddled up to him.

She tries and fails to reach her phone that’s on the other side of the nightstand, so Mason leans forward to tap her dark screen. The time is in big bold letters at the top of the screen, and despite her reading it four or five times just to be sure, it doesn’t change.

“I’ve gotta be up in a couple hours anyways,” she sighs, fully planning on brewing a pot of coffee and inhaling it throughout the entire day. “Might as well get up and finish the book I was reading.”

“How many hours?” He asks against her neck, kissing the scar there to punctuate his question.

“Three, I think.”

“You can fit a good nap in right after,” he chuckles, still buried in the dark sea of her hair between them.

“After what?” She asks, but it comes out more of a sigh when he suckles and nips her shoulder.

“After I fuck you senseless.” Her stomach flutters, her thighs clenching. He doesn’t beat around the bush, that’s for sure.

“Mason, you don’t have to, really. I’m a big girl – I can handle being tired for a day.”

“You’ve gotta patrol tomorrow, right?” His lips are pressed against her ear now, and his hands are splaying across her stomach.

He’s right. Tina’s cousin is visiting from out of town, so she jumped at the chance to relieve her for the night. Should be a huge regret, honestly, but she can’t bring herself to feel that way.

She sucks in a breath when his fingers inch past the waistband of her shorts, past the elastic of her underwear, past the trimmed hair above her folds, settling there with a slow swirl of his middle finger.

“Yeah, I do,” she’s already panting like a fucking fool – she can’t help what he does to her, though.

No one’s touch has ever made her feel this way.

“Gotta be well rested to protect the town.”

“Mhmm,” she agrees, groaning low when he adds two more fingers and picks up speed, rubbing her off at a furious pace.

She should be embarrassed by how fast he makes her come, but considering orgasms with Bobby were few and far between, she’s greedy with them now.

Once she got a taste of being thoroughly fucked and pleasured, she became shameless in collecting them from Mason.

Sucking her earlobe into his mouth, he nibbles the soft skin with a soft pant of his own. Her hand’s on his cock already, palming him through the thin fabric.

He slows his hand, setting an agonizing pace this time, and she’s rolling her hips to try and climax, but it isn’t working.

“Mason, please –”

“Begging already? We haven’t even gotten to the good part yet,” he breathes into her ear, pulling his hand from her shorts and bringing it to his mouth, sucking his glistening fingers over her shoulder.

She whines, barely able to see his tongue dart in between his fingers from her peripheral. “I wanted to come –”

“Impatient ass. You will soon enough,” he smiles into her shoulder, kissing the freckled skin there this time.

She feels the warmth of his hand between her legs, and she’s expecting them to sink into her, but instead he’s hastily tugging her shorts and underwear to the side, hiking her leg in the air.

The fabric rips, and he’s got the audacity to chuckle like he didn’t just ruin her favorite pajama bottoms.

“Hey, those are my favorite –” she barely finishes her sentence when he teases her with his tip, running it up and down her heat.

His hand’s holding up her leg from the knee when he pushes into her.

The sweat rolls down the small of her back – the heat had become an afterthought the second he touched her cunt.

He circles his free arm around her waist, tugging her back till they’re skin to skin.

His hips begin to roll, stroking in and out rhythmically, and all she can do is lie there slack-jawed.

“Oh fuck, that’s so good.” She’s praising him in his favorite way – complimenting him through the pleasure – and that always excites and motivates him.

“Yeah? You like when I fuck you like this? Tell me,” he huffs shakily while he tries to keep his voice even.

She knows she’s got just as equal of a grip on him as he has on her. He’s begrudgingly admitted in the afterglow that he’s never fucked like this before, with both lust and affection intermingling.

“Yes, yes, please, just like that,” she chants, eyelids fluttering shut when his hips snap harder and harder, his arm tightening around her waist.

She digs her fingernails into his arm to anchor herself while he fucks her relentlessly, and he grunts into her ear when she starts bucking her hips, fucking him back.

Her sleeping shirt’s almost completely damp on the back, and it’s gross. Thankfully, they’re in sync, so he helps her slip it over her head, immediately cupping her tits and toying with her nipples.

He’s still fucking her like their lives depend on it, and he’s pressing hot, wet kisses to her back, shoulders, neck… and tweaking her nipples with an expert hand…

It’s too much, and she’s overstimulated, clenching around him. “Shit, oh my god –”

With a quick maneuver, he’s tugged her underneath him, flat on her stomach, and rolls his hips into her steadily.

She’s open mouthed moaning into the pillow and he’s hitting all the right spots with the new angle and she’s clenching her legs so she feels tighter –

He’s singing his praises above her, shifting till he’s on his elbows on top of her, not a breath of space between them. The cool surface of his crystal necklace skims her back, raising goosebumps on her arms.

He’s pressing the weight of his chest onto her back, sinking her further into the pillows.

He’s everywhere.

He’s all she can hear. All she can feel.

Any coherent thought of the long patrol and her uneasy dreams are long gone, and there’s him. Only him.

“You’re so good for me, sweetheart. Get your face out of that pillow. Let me hear you.” She’s already putty in his hands, nodding along to whatever he gravels in her ear, so she obliges.

The noises she’s making aren’t flattering in the slightest. They’re an awful mixture of whines and groans, the cadence of them matching the slap of his hips against her ass.

“Fuck,” he huffs as she raises her hips to meet him, lifting them barely an inch or two off the bed.

If her sounds are getting him off, then his are sending her into another realm.

There’s something practically indescribable about getting another person off without trying to. Mason’s probably felt this high a million times in his existence, but it’s new to her.

With a few swivels of her hips, she’s got him just as worked up as her, and he lets her know.

“God, you’re fuckin’ gorgeous – so fuckin’ tight around me. Your cunt’s perfect for me, Sofía, oh my god,” he pants into her hair, gathering it in one hand at the nape of her neck.

He gently tugs her head to the side so he can kiss her, her eyes are already fluttering shut, her mouth parted as she’s nearing her high.

“What do you need, sweetheart? Tell me,” he murmurs, still watching her profile while she concentrates on the orgasm on the horizon.

“Just – fuck me like that – a little harder – and talk to me –” she manages a few broken demands.

“You’re doing so well taking my cock like that – can’t wait to feel you squeeze around me when you come,” he pants, curling his hips so he’s deeper in her, and she all but cries out, slapping a hand over her mouth.

“No, no, let me hear you – wanna see your pretty lips when you say my name –” his hips are stuttering. He’s close.

Thankfully, she gets there first, calling out his name, clenching her thighs to ride it out while he still pumps in and out of her erratically. He’s not far behind her.

When he comes in her, he groans this whiny groan like he’s the one being fucked into oblivion.

He slides out of her gently before plopping onto the bed next to her, tugging her to his side.

“I don’t know if I’ll wake up in 2 hours like I’m supposed to,” she murmurs, eyes heavy and half lidded from getting her back blown out in the dead of night.

“So I did a good job then?” He smirks, pressing a kiss to her sweaty bangs.

“A perfect job. You should just recreate this every time,” she sighs, pressing a kiss to the skin nearest to her, right on his outer chest.

“You’re asking me to fuck you like that every night? Don’t know if I can recreate it perfectly, but I’m up for the challenge,” he laughs, running a palm down her side.

She can’t remember what she says after that, as she’s fallen asleep topless, sweaty, and in ripped pants almost instantly.

He stays – watches her as she sleeps this time. And he thinks that she’s the most peaceful he’s ever seen her.

#the wayhaven chronicles #twc #twc mason #twc detective #hotwayhavensummer #n*fw #my fic #mason x sofía #detective sofía olmos

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inkperch · 3 years

Text

Linked Universe Zeldas:

My takes on LU style- Zelda’s. Note: I don’t really follow Linked Universe, and I don’t like a lot of their takes on the Links, so uh, don’t assume these Zelda’s dealt with the LU versions of the Links.

SS: goes by Hylia, she jokingly suggests it when they’re picking nicknames, and everyone else just pauses for a second then realises who exactly she is and freaks the fuck out, so it kinda sticks as a combination of an in-joke and just... well, she’s Hylia reborn, can’t argue with that! The others are all low-key taken aback by how not-leadery she is, she tends to be the most hands-off when it comes to planning because well- she just guards the triforce, Link is the one who earned all 3 pieces and used it’s full power. Meanwhile her descendants picked up Wisdom sometime in the intervening centuries, so she’s pretty happy to leave the plans to them and stick to being a mediator. Third most likely Zelda to pick a fight she can’t win, most likely to win despite that.

Minish Cap: goes by Shortie, bc these beanpoles tried that with Tetra and she threatened to stab them, but Minish just found it hilarious so it stuck. Surprisingly quick to pick up how to fight, occasionally gets the other Zelda’s into trouble by running off, but they usually agree with her that whatever caught her eye was actually pretty worth it, because deep down they’re all massive nerds, no matter how functional they appear. Also tends to randomly grab gifts for the other Zeldas.

Four Swords: just goes by Four, jokes about how much her Hero(es) would be annoyed by that. Usually the first to notice encroaching danger, and always the first to investigate it. At first the more combat-experienced Zelda’s were Concerned(tm) that she is the one sticking herself into unknown dangers, until she pointed out that A) she is considerably less likely to get herself caught unless Sheik wants to go, bc she knows she has less leeway to get caught than they are and B) they won’t be down a fighter for the rescue if she’s the one who gets caught, which they reluctantly concede.

OoT: goes by Regrets, which like, the other Zelda’s just hear her bitterly pick as soon as the topic comes up and immediately decide they aren’t touching that emotional baggage. It’s an mix of Child and Adult timeline Zelda, which kinda fucks her up when she thinks about it- especially seeing as she remebers both Ganondorf breaking free and killing one of the Seven Sages in the child timeline, and what became of the Hero of Time... who she remembers clinging to the thought he got to have the childhood he rightfully should’ve in the Adult Timeline, as the waves climbed up over Hyrule to seal the awakened and unchallenged Ganondorf. So yeah, she tries not to. She also remembers the start of the Defeat Timeline, where she was too late to save the Hero and was forced to lead the exhausted and scattered remains of her people to war to kill the Demon King.

Wind Waker: literally just Tetra, she also is the first to look at the less murder-happy Zeldas and give them a knife. She’s currently working on getting them all up to basic pirate crew levels of fighting without magic, just in case, and she’s constantly pestering the fight-y Zelda’s to a spar. Regrets goes along because she’s had three slightly different Zelda’s merged in her head so her skills are a little rusty, Hylia likes to do it just because people keep forgetting she learned to fight at the same school Link did, and their responses when she reminds them are funny to her. Tetra is picked up from after establishing New Hyrule, and she looks up to Hylia more than she’s willing to admit, often going to her for advice on the whole ‘founding a nation in peaceful cohabitation with the locals’ thing. Second most likely to start a fight she can’t win.

Spirit Tracks: goes by Ghost, refuses to explain the joke to any of the others and thinks she’s hilarious for it. She is, but she doesn’t need the ego stoke. They find out about the ghost thing when she accidently astral projects in her sleep at one point and wakes up to them freaking out over her corpse, which is implied to happen often. Tetra notices that she’s really really weird to train as a fighter, because she already fights pretty well but she also fights like she’s a giant fuck-off suit of armour with a sword as big as she is. She finds it amazing to get to meet Tetra, and is constantly asking her if various stories she heard as a child are actually true or if her mother just made them up or exaggerated. They were not, and Ghost thinks Tetra is the coolest person on the planet for it.

Twilight Princess: goes by Twilight, out of tribute to Midna’s nickname for her. Absolutely misses Midna, respects Regrets more than Regrets thinks she should, but she still angsts a lot about how she just surrendered to the unkillable army its implied she’s the only one who could even see properly who could turn them all into ghos- ahem. I may or may not have opinions about people thinking it’s the wrong decision from out of universe. But yeah, she absolutely angsts about it, and really looks up to Tetra and Regrets bc at least they acted, she just sat in her tower and waited for the hero she knew would be coming. Saying that though, she indulged Tetra’s pestering to fite exactly once (1), and promptly kicked her ass and went back to her book. Because really, what else was she going to do with all that free time while Link was fishing to win a Heart Container and she couldn’t leave her room? Ganondorf had to get the idea to have her use a sword somewhere.

FSA: Even among Zelda's, she stands out for how friendly she is- more than once she brought a ‘new friend’ back to camp who’d been trying to kill them seconds earlier. This got her the nickname Torch, because she shines light into even the darkest of creatures- although, Hylia would like it if she never interacted with any of the mini-Imprisoned from HW ever again please and thank you, that was a step too far for exotic pets.

(I’ll do a followup post for the Defeat Timeline, it has a lot of the older games I haven’t played and need to familiarise myself with the characters in, and it’s already getting late)

Hyrule Warriors: goes by Sheik, was unironically ready to fight her ancestor for the name, but Regrets doesn’t really care. Speaking of regrets, upon learning that Regrets did the exact same disguise in the Adult timeline, Sheik immediately wants to go stab Cia (and maybe Lana too) for letting her think she was getting away with the disguise when Cia had literally seen the exact same trick just one timeline over. (post post-game definitive edition, so Cia has her redemption arc) She also was never meant to be the bearer of the Triforce of Wisdom, and views it as a burden- without Cia’s interference, the Triforce of Wisdom and it’s visions would’ve been passively sitting in the royal vaults instead of etched into her hand, but fate got confused when the Triforce had been split, but the one who should inherit Wisdom was much better suited to Courage. This leads to a bit of a disconnect sometimes, where fate has changed her into a suitable host for the Triforce of Wisdom, but she just kinda isn’t one. She’s also a MASSIVE nerd (I saw those TP references in Linkle’s Twilight stage Nintendo! She literally started dropping random history quotes after almost dying, the nerd) so she’s constantly fangirling over all her famous ancestors, because if anyone had managed to hear legends from all 3 timelines, it would be HW Zelda. The most likely to pick a fight she can’t win, she literally only pretends to be functional and have impulse control when they’re in her Hyrule and her people can see her.

BOTW:

Both BoTW Zeldas avoid each other like the plague because yeah, that’s a physical manifestation of my failures. They’re not consolidated like OoT was for bonus angst- because just merging them would show her there’s a happier timeline where all of her friends survived and Hyrule didn’t fall and crumble to ruins while she and Link took a 100 year nap.

AoC: goes by Terrako, because why the hell not. Has Terrako with her, which gets confusing, but he’s an adorable Eggy Boi, and basically team mascot. Is using her Master Cycle+Sheikah Slate movesets, bc she tried to use her Goddess bow moveset and reality just kinda glitched bc there were two Zelda’s using the exact same power, and they both agreed to never try that again.

BoTW: goes by Architect, because that’s what she spends half her time doing these days. Regularly nerds out with Sheik. Low-key dying inside from self-worth issues rearing up again now that she’s hanging out with all these legendary queens, but tries not to let it show and keep with a positive attitude, too mixed results.

#legend of zelda #linked universe #zelda #spirit tracks

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seancekitsch · 4 years

Text

Barefoot

warnings: angst, communication issues, talking about relapsing, addiction, drugs and alc, not overtly mentioned but like these characters are like this bc of trauma and repression, spoilers for the movie the graduate which i severely misunderstood as a kid, dirty fuckin smut

When you wake up, Klaus isn’t there. Just like yesterday. Just like the day before yesterday. Or the day before that. The bed is cold even with you in the sheets. Light streams into the window but it does nothing to help. The studio is drafty and it will only get colder in the winter months, and those socks are already coming in handy. Rent is due soon and while you’d be surprised if Klaus left you alone with the lease, you’d couldn’t be sure. People had left you before, but Klaus is the one you wouldn't know how to cope without. His tea from four days ago is still sitting on the bistro table, cold and settling, surely disgusting but you’re afraid that if you touch it, if you clean it up, well then. Klaus wouldn’t return. Klaus would be gone from this apartment . Vanishing himself from this studio and this life like one of his ghosts. The tea would evaporate eventually or grow mold but it was all you had to hold onto for him to come back. Maybe it all wasn’t real. Maybe it was a trick of your imagination. Maybe you’re the ghost. Maybe you’re just a trick of his imagination that he got tired of playing with and-

Fuck. That’s when you realize you’re in a bad way.

What do normal people do when they feel things getting bad again? Do other people feel the backslide and just somersault into it by refusing to clean or get out of bed? By dealing with the pitiful look from their boss by buying absinthe on the way home from work? God, the look Margie gave you. It killed you. By convincing themselves that all of this good they just had was just a Belle Reve and you were Blanche about to be taken right back to the clinic? You actively gag as you sip from the bottle starting around noon, the sweetness at first being a fun distraction, now actively grossing you out as you continued to drain it. Absinthe wasn't actually the plan, it was just there, it was just strong. Now you regret it and wish you got something you even liked. At least this is the worst of it, though. Before you would have fully slid back into your old ways and not thought twice.

You wonder if there was something about your role in what transpired, if there was something you could have done or not done to change the outcome. Could you have kissed him and shut him up so he never would have said ‘I love you’? Could you have done something other than shake your head ‘no’ out of panic and start to cry? Could you have just said it fucking back because you mean it too? Could you have not continued to panic and said something along the lines of “I’m not a replacement for Dave” when Klaus tried to say it again? Could you have said or done anything just to stop him from hastily dressing himself and leaving in the middle of the night, leaving you there silently crying on the bed? If he were anyone else, you would have said it back immediately, because if it were anyone but him, words would be something you just threw around aimlessly. They're just words. You'd said it a million times to your ex-fiance. If this were anyone else, you would have said it back immediately, and probably relapsed the next morning in panic. But it isn't anyone else. Its Klaus fucking Hargreeves. It's the guy from across the hall at the clinic. It's the guy who helped you steal socks, then a table to eat dinner at. It's the guy you literally have traveled across time and space for. And you did love him. It wasn't just a phrase. You knew that for a while now, but part of you would have liked to keep it hidden forever. Because once you say it, the bubble bursts. It's out there and you can't take it back. It's real and tangible and it's not the fantasy of Klaus, it's Klaus himself. In order to say it you'd have to kill the fantasy Klaus. You’d have to murder him and all of the mythology around him and live in the real world with him, which might have even been stranger than any fantasy you could come up with. He deserved better than this. He deserves more than me, you think, than someone who would hurt him to protect herself. Selfish bitch. Gotta do better. By the time you finish half the bottle, eat your cold lo mein take out from two days ago, and decide to take a nap, you've made a decision. If you ever see Klaus Hargreeves again (which is doubtful because you don't plan on leaving this bed unless it's for work and even that feels like not a good enough reason) you'll kill the fantasy Klaus and commit to loving the real Klaus.

But sleep doesn't come. The cold leftovers sit like a rock in your stomach, not at all mixing well with the green liquorice liquor you've downed, so you lay there eyes-closed begging for the pain to subside. It's a familiar feeling, much like the week and a half in the bed before Klaus inserted himself into your life. The ache and the want for more than you have but the inability to give it to yourself. So you lay there. You just lay there, for hours. Thank god Margie gave you a few days off. You lose all track of time just laying there, actively trying not to think, trying to ignore how you feel both physically and mentally, curling into the sheets until you can feel yourself melt into them.

It’s dark when you hear the keys rattle in the lock, and then the door opens. You keep your eyes shut, because if you do you can pretend it’s an intruder, coming to rob you of your mismatched dishes and beat up old record player before killing you. Which is a reasonable and comforting fantasy that you rather hide in than face Klaus. Klaus was real and Klaus loved you and Klaus got in your head. The intruder is a fantasy and the intruder is horror and the intruder might not even let you beg for your life. You can gladly imagine the intruder using keys that maybe he stole off of Klaus to come in here and steal all of your monetarily worthless shit and then just stab you or something anticlimactic. You know exactly what you want to say to Klaus and how to say it but you don’t know if it’ll come out of your mouth when the time comes, so you cling to this stupid horrible thought to take your mind off of the sound of footsteps entering the apartment. So you keep your eyes shut when you hear the sound of boots being taken off, when you hear the deflating sigh, the pattering around the room slowly before you hear the sounds of ruffling, probably his coat being taken off. You keep your eyes shut as there's a distinct silence in the room besides your best fake-asleep deep breathing. Like he's holding his breath and waiting for something.

You lay still, keeping up the fake sleeping, as the mattress creaks and dips next to you and Klaus sighs again. He emanates the warmth that had all but been stoked from the apartment and left you shivering. You can feel yourself pulling towards him, wanting to wrap your arms around him and hold him and never let go again, but you don't. There's always the off chance this is just a very strong hallucination brought on by the bottle of green fairy on the floor next to the bed. But fuck, if you dont wanna just pull him close.

“I know you're awake,” he says lowly, so close to you. His face is centimeters from yours, if you had to guess, nose just almost touching your own.

“You know, I used to watch you sleep all the time. You- you do this… this cute twitchy thing when you're out cold,” he continues. He sighs, realizing you're either much more stubborn than he thought or much more avoidant of anything vulnerable than he is. It took him a day of sitting on Diego’s floor while being lectured for his drinking habits for him to realize that he couldn't give up with you. He made peace with the fact that he couldn't save Dave. He couldn't change history, but he could change the future he could have with you if only he didn't let this go. But it was his conversation with your boss that had him worried. It wasn't like you not to show up for work, even if things were tough.

“You know you’re actually terrible at faking it, right?” he asks, for clarification. You want to open your eyes, to laugh, but you keep them shut and a tear escapes down your cheek.

“Can you— can you just look at me? Please?”

It hurts, it fucking hurts but you shake your head no.

“Oh don’t do that shit again. C’mon, doc, look at me!”

You can’t.

“Your tea went cold. I-I’m sorry,” is barely a whisper. But you say it. And he hears it.

“Hey! Hey hey hey, don’t worry about that. Don’t worry.”

He chooses his next words very carefully. If you were to open your eyes, you’d see him yearning to touch you, a worried and pained expression all over his handsome features. You’d see his hair just as unkempt as yours and the tee shirt he’s wearing is also obviously yours. You’d see those beautiful green eyes doing their best impression of bambi right after the hunting scene.

“What have you... what’s been going on? You haven’t been by the shop.”

“You went there?” you whisper again. Still kind of afraid this all isn’t real. You know it is because you feel his breath fanning out against your face and you feel the bed becoming the warm welcoming thing it once was.

“Yeah. Yeah, I did. Margie said you weren’t coming in for a week.”

“She spoke to you?” you wince. Knowing that was probably highly unpleasant for the both of them. Half the time when he showed up at the end of your shift she made him wait outside of the shop and refused to look at him.

“Yeah Margie, christ that woman loves you.”

Your eyes shoot open, startling him a little, but he relaxes by the time your eyes adjust to the dark. You see him and only him. Everything is Klaus.

“Listen, I-“ You start a little too loudly, scaring yourself.

“No, no. Don’t say something you don’t mean. Don’t say it back because I said it.”

Fuck. Fuck is he even going to believe it when I say it? If not what’s the fucking point? You feel more tears pricking at your eyes and you crumble a little. The burst of confidence is gone as you curl farther in on yourself, feeling your legs brush his as you let out just the tiniest choked sob. He’s frozen, and your hand is searching, blindly grabbing against the sheet until it comes in contact with his. Hurriedly, as if he would sift through your fingers like sand, you entangle your fingers with his and squeeze as hard as you can. Like if you let go he goes too. You can’t lose him again but it sounds like a break up. It sounds like what you remember a break up sounding like.

“Please,” fuck you sound pathetic.

“It’s okay. I’ll be fine. It’s okay if you don’t love me back. I can go stay at Diego’s or Vanya’s or something and we can figure out how to get out of the lease early. Anything you want. I just wanted to let you know I meant what I said. You’re not a replacement for anyone. You’re who I want. But you don’t have to want me back. I’ll... live.” he finishes flatly, devoid.

Your heart is officially breaking. Into a million tiny fucking pieces. A memory comes to the forefront of your mind in that moment. The first time you choked him. The way he looked up at you. The way you realized at that second just how many people probably took advantage of him in the past. The way he probably thinks you’ve done to him now too.

“No, Klaus please listen to me,” your voice doesn’t sound like your own, doesn’t feel like your own. You feel far away from him even though his hand is clasped in your own. You feel like that scene in the graduate where Dustin Hoffman is interrupting Elaine Robinson’s wedding. Screaming and slamming fists against the glass trying to change your fate. Trying to get him to see.

“I was scared. Fuckin terrified. I- I- I- I’ve never said those words and meant it before,” you gasp between sobs now much more eager to spill out of your mouth, “It wasn’t you, I got in my own head about it. I got surprised. I love you, Klaus. I love you so fucking much I didn’t touch a fucking thing in this apartment because I was afraid somehow that meant you wouldn’t come back. I know I’m not replacing Dave. I know. I don’t know why I said that. I've wanted to take it back since the second I said it. I've hurt so many people and I hurt the one person I didn’t wanna hurt. I never wanna hurt you again. I love you. fuck. I don’t want to stop saying that. I love you.”

Klaus... is surprisingly quiet through your little speech. Maybe it’s because you can’t control what your voice is doing, and you’re crying. He’s staring at you so hard it feels as if he's trying to look through you, see the transparencies, see the truth in what you're saying. You want to shrink under his gaze, knowing he's trying to sus out if you mean it, feeling vulnerable each passing ticking second.

But then his hand squeezes yours back just as hard. If he squeezed hard enough he could easily crush a few of your bones, and you'd let him if it meant he understood.

“You do,” more a confirmation than a question.

“I do.”

“Say it.”

“I love you.”

“Say it again.”

“I love you,” with more force, more conviction.

“Once more, with feeling!” a smile is beginning to grace his lips.

“I fucking love you, Klaus!” you shout pretty much directly into his face. He doesn't mind a damn bit. He presses forward eagerly; releasing your hand only to roughly cup the back of your neck, fingers digging into your skin. It hurts, but in the most satisfying way. Your hands reach and grip for his face, greedily moving your palms over his jawbone as you lock him into place. Klaus is dizzying in his fervor, barely letting you keep up as his teeth clatter against yours, bite at your lips, his tongue darting between your tasting lips and tickling the roof of your mouth. there’s no letting up to the onslaught even as his hands travel, one hand trailing trimmed nails down your back, sure to leave a mark even with the barrier of your shirt, the other groping at your chest, seeking out a nipple to harshly pinch, making you squeak into his mouth in shock at his actions. As possessive and kinky as he could be at times, he has never been this rough with you. And you like it. He takes the time to bite down on your bottom lip, pull away, shake his head a little before mercifully releasing it and putting his forehead to yours.

“Oh you, you—“ he draws out, scoffs, “you wicked thing. You had me worried.”

“I’m sorry,” you gasp.

His grip on you softens, relaxes. His eyes shut just so, full of contentment. His nose nuzzles forward until you're cheek to cheek, and you can feel your cheek isn't the only one that's a little damp.

“Stop apologizing. I have you back now,” he whispers, sounding the most at peace you've ever heard him. He presses a kiss to the skin right at the place where your jawbone and ear meet, making you shiver at the sound of contact. He pulls you flush with his body, a tight hug, just holding you there before maneuvering your body so you were laying flat, your chest and shoulders pressed to the bed while he presses kisses to your face.

“Trust me,” he says, and you do. He lays himself back down, on top of you, and fuck, you love this. You love when he lays on you, when you feel his weight resting on you. Earlier today you thought you'd never feel this again, and the fact that thought was false has you grinning from ear to ear and reaching back to play with his curls as his arms find their way under you to hug you as you chant your love for him like a mantra. And then you feel it. Klaus is hard as a rock. Poor thing, it's been almost a week for him, when the two of you were so used to going at it basically anytime you had a spare half hour. Playfully, you grind back into him a little bit. Nothing that means business, but just a little brush of your ass against his cock to have him squirm a little. He reacts immediately with a growl and buries his face in the side of your neck to kiss and bite your neck and shoulder, while one hand removes itself from the hug to slide up your shirt again and blindly grope at your chest. Two can play at this game. You grind back again, a little harder, a little more deliberate in your movements this time. You're both chuckling as he starts to grind back, both feeling extremely free and confident in your control over each other's bodies. He knows he could have your sweatpants off and be inside you in under a minute, and you know you could easily have him blow his load in his pants if you keep it up teasing him like this. But how long can you really keep it up without wanting to give in to your own desires? You're painfully aware that it's been days you've had to survive without Klaus’ touch, too.

“You wanna end kiddie hour here?” he asks, and he couldn't have asked soon enough, because you're shimmying your sweatpants down with clumsy help from your hand that's somewhat trapped under him and laughing as he just as blunderingly removes his. Neither of you bother to fully remove them because the second his cock makes contact with your skin you're sighing and reminding him you love him. He lines himself up with you without using his hands like this is something he just instinctively knows how to do.

When he pushes into you, you whimper. Full on whimper like it's too much even though this is something you've done hundreds of times with him, but somehow it's new. Maybe making love isn't just a sentimental name for fucking. Maybe you're making love for the first time. Maybe now you know the difference. He brings the arm that was under your shirt back up and trails it down your arm until it gets to your hand, where he rubs his palm against your knuckles, almost inquisitively before tangling your fingers together and squeezing. Holding it in place. His other arm reaches just a little further, hugging you from behind and giving your waist a little squeeze as a ‘get ready’ signal. You tilt your ass back up at him a little as he pulls out, thrusts back in again. Only this time his thrust is punctuated with an “I love you”.

And so is the next one.

And the next one.

Until he works up a rhythm that leaves the both of you moaning and stuttering. You hike up one leg, changing the angle so slightly that his hips snap up into you in a way guaranteed to bruise. You’d happily have it hurt to sit for the next week if he kept fucking into you like he would break you. Klaus puts his full strength into fucking you, legs pinning you to the mattress as he uses the arm that’s holding your hand for extra leverage. Sweat dripping off of his chest as he kisses your back and moans and laughs into your skin. It’s times like this you remember your partner is fully trained in combat. For someone so lean, he’s strong, and he has strong control over the muscles in his body. It’s like a kind of clairvoyance he has to know exactly what parts of your body to touch, what to do to have you losing it around him all the time. Is Klaus Clairvoyant? You think as the angle of his thrusts changes ever so slightly, but still at that rough pace, now making your clit grind into the sheets beneath you making you scream out.

“That’s right, baby. You feel good?” he groans. Little shit.

“Yeah,” you whine, looking back to make eye contact.

“Who’s making you feel good?” Oh, he’s working for an ego stroke as well as a cock stroke. You’ll give it to him. Klaus deserves it.

“Oh, fuck— y-you, Klaus”

“And who do you love?”

“Fuck. You, Klaus! I love you so much,” words leak from your mouth like a sieve. “I love how- how you fuck me so good.”

“That’s right, and now I'm gonna make you come. Trust me.”

That's the second time tonight he’s asked you to trust him. You do, unwaveringly.He gives you no time to react before he speeds up his thrusts and the hand around your waist dips lower. He leans off of you a little, giving you a little more space, but plunges his hand between your legs. instead of stopping at your clit, he goes as far as to push a finger, his middle finger, up into you as well. And then the bastard curls his finger just slightly. The action has you turning into the pillow to scream. It's too much. It's too much. You've never been this full in your life and now it feels almost sinful how easily you are coming apart for him. You're shaking and with the added pressure of his finger you can feel just how hard your body is squeezing his cock. You can feel tears leaving your eyes for the second time tonight as you babble about how much you love him and your body jolts for his touch. He finishes too, inside you and happily pushed into the hilt. The whine that leaves your throat when he pulls out finally is unfair and needy. Already missing being so full of him. He rolls back over so that he's not on top of you, and pulls you in tight.

“I don't want to stop saying it,” he mutters into your hair, and you wait for him to continue patiently.

“I don't want to stop saying I love you.”

“Then don't.”

“I won't. But I will throw away this take out. This lo mein is old. It smells.”

You laugh loud and hearty, and he gets up from the bed, fully kicking his pants off as he does so, and there's no fear that he won't come back to bed with you this time.

#klaus hargreeves x reader #klaus hargreeves smut #klaus hargreeves imagine #klaus hargreeves fanfic #my work #prize buck series

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leahseclipse · 3 years

Text

Difficult day

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Summary: (based on a prompt) Spencer and Reader give up coffee and help each other by trying to find ways to keep each other awake.

Warnings: Mentions of murder (not real, just ironically, don’t worry, nothing dangerous there.)

Word count: 2.3 k

A/N: Hi there- so uh, this fic is rly meant to be a silly little one, so it's a bit whack,(and not rly written well to me) I just wrote it bc the idea was there and I felt like writing it at 1am……………...so hope u enjoy a bit lmao (also i never drank coffee once, so I just researched stuff online and wrote it)

Deciding to start the day without coffee probably was a bad idea to think about, it just hit them while they were talking, and Spencer sort of announced the idea.

“Hey, why don’t we try to give up coffee, and see if we can survive without it, you know.”

What a...excellent idea.

She’s now looking like a zombie, wandering around, and can’t resist the idea of closing her eyes.

Y/N has been up since 6AM, and it’s about...11 now. Which felt more like a whole day.

The worst of all, is that she couldn’t even bug Spencer about it either, he decided to do it as well, but at least, she has a coffee-deprived friend to support her.

The real problem, is that, Hotch might not be happy with the consequences, which are...sleeping at work, so, not working.

What a great day ahead of them, yay.

She’s probably making a fuss about it, as after a bit of searching, it only lasts about a few days or so, but right now, she just wishes it could stop right now.

She already knows that as soon as Spencer is going to walk in the room and launch the subject, a mountain of facts is going to fall, and she wouldn’t even be aware of how long it’s, and when it’s ever going to stop.

Because, even if there’s four facts (which isn’t about to happen), he develops each of them in the form of essays, which seems like a whole conference.

Y/N doesn’t mind, it’s not annoying, she likes to hear about it, it gives more knowledge and stuff, but when it ends to be an essay long, especially when she doesn’t happen to have drunk coffee, things get complicated, in terms of focus.

Such as, being slightly, just a little, really not much irritated, but mostly tired as hell.

Working is not in her plans at all. Sleeping is.

Taking a day long nap, as much as possible, but, fucking work, has decided to annoy her, as much as it could, with a wonderful surprise: a pile of papers, that you have to read, think about, write about- as you think about it, make sure it’s well described, filled out, so your boss doesn’t bug you with it, causing you to re-write it, which...makes you lose motivation, as you have to go through the whole process, which makes you...even more tired.

She seriously has no idea how she’s going to make it through the whole day, and strangely feels like the coffee machine has been mocking her since she arrived.

All she wants is to hide it with whatever is in the room, or smash it against a wall, but that isn’t...possible, as not everyone is doing ‘their challenge’, if that can be seen as one, because to y/n, it’s more of a torture.

If Spencer didn’t have that pretty face to protect, she would punch him in the nose as soon as he’d appear in front of her.

That wasn’t even her idea, she didn’t think that when she mentioned it, he’d take it seriously, resume the subject and make it real.

She really regrets talking about it, because he didn’t just skip it or talk normally, no, Spencer doesn’t do that.

He really had to take it as far as he could.

Now she possibly wants to kill him, but unfortunately remembered that he’s going through the same thing, and will probably want to either kill her, or attempt something less violent, such as making her talk about a subject that interests him on purpose and make an essay out of it.

And, of course, steal all ways of distraction, and make sure she can’t go, because he also ‘tortures’ her by asking questions, and when she can’t answer, he develops it even more which makes the rest of the essay late, and last longer.

Again, it isn’t in a mean way, just annoying her as well.

They often do that, find ways to annoy each other, it’s kind of a habit they picked up throughout the years, they both find it distracting and can be a nice way to distract each other when work happens to be quite annoying.

But, never has she thought that he’d take the joke to the point of what keeps her awake.

That sneaky bastard even left a box of tea on her desk, and she would have probably thrown it out if it wasn’t so expensive.

If only he wasn’t doing it as well, oh, how she would have grabbed a knife from the kitchen to throw it at him.

Also, also, as if it couldn’t get any better, one of them had to stay awake, in case one happens to fall asleep.

Double the dose of fun.

She can’t wait to see him cross...the door.

Strangely, as soon as she told it, Y/N saw a well known face make his way through the bureau.

She even had to keep her from standing up and possibly strangle him.

He didn’t even stop to talk to other people, just said ‘hi’, and basic stuff you say when you arrive at work, and arrived at the conference room.

It happened to be empty, so she took the occasion and settled there.

“Oh, you’re already there? Thought you’d come in later.”

“I came early, because I knew that I’d ignore my alarm and possibly arrive an hour later than you...or not at all.”

“Okay. How are-”

“Dead. What about you?”

“The same.” Spencer said, as he sat up. “So, about it-”

“...knew it.”

“...why don’t we discuss so, you know, we distract ourselves from...the fatigue, and...all of the other effects that come with a coffee withdrawal?”

“Do I look like I have the energy to do that?”

“...no.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“To distract ourselves, as said.”

“My head hurts, I want to sleep, I’m pissed off, how do I even do that?”

“By trying to avoid bright lights...oh, yeah, that doesn’t work.”

“As figured.”

“So...if I understood well, we’re screwed for the rest of the week?”

“Exactly, genius.”

“Great plan.”

“It was your idea.”

“Can’t deny.”

“You could have chosen something else than fucking coffee Spencer.”

“I didn’t have any idea but that.”

“Come on. You always have a ton of stuff in that brain, and just on that day: nothing.”

“My brain lagged.”

“Oh, I forgot your brain is a computer now apparently.”

“It is one, I am my own computer, I just have a system that can fail, like a regular computer.”

“Which OS are you on? Genius OS? Because your ‘intelligent’ system sucks right now. I prefer Windows.”

“Hey, when we agreed to do that, insulting each other wasn’t part of the thing.”

“It’s the only thing I have in mind, because if I don’t do it, I’m either killing you, or sleeping to try to calm down. I could also do both. Murder, then sleep, and I just pretend someone walked in and killed you while I was sleeping.”

“...that’s not very nice.”

“It’s the nicest thing I’ll probably be saying today, so, enjoy.”

“I didn’t know that included you being rude. I’m also tired, but I don’t act meanly.”

“Oh, sorry, did I hurt your feelings?”

“...yes.”

“Too bad.”

“Rude.”

“ ‘s not.”

“If you continue like that, you’re going to be the one keeping watch.”

“We agreed on the other one doing it if one of us falls asleep. None of us are, we’ll see when one of us sleeps.”

"Is this a contest or what? You know that the minute one of us puts his head down on the table, they'll be out if nothing wakes them up?"

"Yeah, I know. But if that's a contest of who can stay awake longer, you're going to lose, you've been on coffee much longer, prepare to suffer."

"You look dead, you're the one that's going to sleep first. I almost caught you dozing off when I walked in."

"No you didn't."

"I did."

"...no."

"You're lying. That small "no" gave it all away."

"I talk like that in general. It's nothing."

"You talk like that just today. The only thing that hasn't changed is your squeaky voice."

"I don't have a squeaky- I have one."

"Told it."

"Oh, shut it."

"You'd be too sad.without my knowledge."

"No...I wouldn't."

"You're smart because of me."

"Mhm. 'f you tell so." She says, propping up her chin on her hands.

"You're already giving up five minutes in. You're very strong."

"Am not. I'm just...putting my hand on my hands, just that."

"Just that."

"Exactly."

"You don't know...how to lie properly." He said, stretching up a bit.

"You're going to be sleeping in a bit too."

"Don't you know me by now? I'm stronger than you."

"Hm. Elevator accident."

"That doesn't count."

"You had a small voice."

"I was just scared, okay? I- I don't like being in small spaces for too long."

"Says the 'strong man'."

"Okay, I'm not as strong as I said, but just a bit more, because being at your level equals being weak."

"Hm. Okay." Y/N lazily responds, as a pair of heels begins clacking onto the floor, the sound growing closer, until a familiar face comes in.

"Is there a meeting I wasn't informed of or what?" Garcia asks.

"No, we just sat here. Trying to stay awake, and y/n is that close to sleeping."

"Shut up, you were about to as well."

"And you're just here like that? Imagine if Hotch even found you guys."

"Yeah that'd- y/n. Y/N." Spencer raised his voice, trying to get her attention.

"Let me." Garcia interrupted, walking to her as she shook her. "Y/N, wake up and stand up, you two are going to follow me."

"Hm…? Where?"

"You're going to stay in my office for a bit, but just for today. I'm taking a risk by doing that."

"Do we get to sleep there?" Spencer asked.

"Just for a bit. Not all day, I'm doing you guys a favor here, you're going to have to find a big way to thank me if Hotch finds out and yells at me."

"Deal." Y/N answers, quickly stretching as she stands up, lazily walking to the exit along with the two.

It's been just half an hour until Hotch begins to wander around, wondering why he can't find either of them anywhere.

He just saw them walking in, and now, they're nowhere to be found.

No one else saw them since, and the only person left to ask would be Garcia, she's been in her office all day.

Just when she begins to make her way back, a stern voice calling her name interrupts her.

"Garcia. Did you see Reid and y/l/n?"

"No, I haven't seen them all day..must be doing work." She answers.

"They're in there, aren't they? They're nowhere else."

"...maybe?"

"They're supposed to be working, and I doubt that's what they're doing right now."

"But Hotch, leave them; this is how true love starts in fanfiction. Don't you see it?"

"Fan what…? I really have to get you drug tested some day."

"Fanfiction you know, it's stories that people write, it's all cute, in some they fall in love and all, so, that's why you have to leave them, they fell asleep on each other, and it's so cute."

"Garcia, I thought you agreed to stop reading that stuff at work, didn't you?"

"...I read them on breaks."

“Fanfiction or not, love or not, they’re not supposed to be sleeping, so, please don’t force me to break that door to come in.”

“Don’t yell, they were really tired, so I...offered them to stay. Mostly because I wanted to help, but also because they’re so cute, I couldn’t resist seeing them sleeping together.”

“That depends on how quick they can wake up.” Hotch announces, stepping to the entrance of the room.

When they both step in, you’re both sitting on chairs and Spencer is sleeping against y/n’s shoulder, while her head is on his.

As soon as Garcia wishes for Hotch not to wake them up, he steps further in the room, clearing his throat as his foot tapped against the tiles.

It didn’t take much for them to wake up, everyone knew that when Hotch’s voice was to be heard, you definitely had to be awake if you wanted to avoid a sermon.

"I'm awake, I'm awake!" Y/N stated, as if it could make the situation somehow better.

"Reid." Hotch said.

"I'm there, I- oh, did I...fall asleep on your shoulder? Sorry for that."

"As much as I'd like to reassure you, Hotch is behind, so that'll have to wait."

"Oh...sir."

"Care to explain?"

"Well uh...I don't think I actually have one."

"...we didn't have coffee for a day or two because we decided to stop so, yeah."

"Does this even look like a valuable reason?"

"No." They both admit.

"If I see this happen again, you're aware of the consequences."

"Yes sir." Spencer responds.

"Absolutely." Y/N answers, as the eyes of the group follow Hotch leaving the room, a sigh exiting their lips. "That was...the worst moment of my life."

"You two are disappointing, I was so excited to see a real life fanfiction, but you had to get caught."

"Garcia it doesn't exist, stop reading these. It's not like we're in love."

"It's because you don't know how to recognize true love y/n. You're a newbie."

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Fairy tale stuff, you know. The couple falls in love, eventually gets married, has kids , and everything ends well."

"I think we should talk to Hotch about getting you to take a drug test or other." Spencer pointed out.

"We should."

#cm #cbs cm #Criminal Minds #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #Criminal Minds Spencer Reid #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid #dr. spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #aaron hotchner #Penelope Garcia #criminal minds fluff #Spencer Reid fic #spencer reid fluff

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thelostguardianau · 4 years

Text

The Lost Guardian- Chapter Eight

“Heed the Silenced”

(Authors note: aha.. yknow I should probably stop making promises for this fic. Months later, w/ a chapter that doesn’t have Thomas in it, three different outlines down and i’m really just at the mercy of this fic at this point xD considering midway through writing this chapter I had to cut and rewrite an entire scene i’d spent a month on bc I’d decided that Dee had a chance at redemtion that added an actual direction and a tangable end goal to this story. So. Yeah. And!! A loud Thank You!! to @bumblebeekitten for helping me bounce ideas back & forth for this au and being my beta for this chapter!!)

Character Info & Art:

Chapter Seven | Chapter Nine

Fandom: Thomas Sanders Sides

Pairings: Eventual Polyamsanders (LAMPR/CALMR-a.k.a LAMP/CALM + Remy ‘Sleep’ Sanders)

Warnings: THIS CHAPTER IS KINDA DIALOG HEAVY!(sorry) Currently depicted as morally grey Deceit(subject to change in future chapters), though the side of Deceit from his first appearance doesnt make an appearance in this chapter and it is explained why, mentions of past betrayal and dark descriptions of bodily concepts, curses, limitations, and changes only really explained as possible through the lore of this au. Deceit speaks in riddles because he has to, ominous warnings. Virgil still isn’t okay mentally. Mentions of indifference to death, lack of selfworth or self preservation. (Let me know if I need to add anything!)

[[MORE]]

Brown eyes flutter open at the chilly breeze of a fan, and the ravenette’s mind comes to realize that he’s been moved from resting on his stomach to laying on his back. Groggy from his much too short nap, it takes a few moments to realize there are no warm bodies near him or under him, no breathing or chatter of familiar voices to sooth him.

The room, he realizes, is empty.

The room itself is, in fact, not Remy’s bedroom at all.

Shooting straight up, Virgil’s first clear thought is that he’s back at home. At his apartment, this time in his hoodie yet still roughed up from his latest ‘adventure’. The scene is eerily familiar, and yet he knows this time that work is not where he needs to be. It’s already daylight and his mind now knows this familiar scene, he should feel alone. Yet, this time he can hear the sound of honking cars and people, his loud neighbor from upstairs stomping around.

It doesn’t make sense as he walks to his window and peers out to see vague cars and people, he can’t even seem to make out any individual faces. It’s grey and raining outside, but there is no pattering sound against the foggy window. ‘What’s happening?’ Virgil wonders.

“Life seemed so simple a week ago, even months ago, did it not..?” A familiar voice drifts from behind him. Ice cold fear shoots down the ravenette’s spine as he recognizes the voice.

“I can hardly believe you were able to leave it, your routine. It was your everything, back when you came to terms with what you had left. Am I wrong, Virgil?” Whirling around to face the voice, Virgil finds the terrifying ex-Guardian sitting on his couch looking quite at home, if a little sheepish.

“What do you care?” He spat back, stepping back against his window.

“I am only looking out for you, you know. I have been protecting you all your life. Of all people I think I would know what is best for you, don't you think? We are connected after all, you and I.” The man sighed, making a surrendering motion with his hands.

“Why would I trust you?! You tried to kill me yesterday!” Virgil growled. “Why--h-how are you even here!?”

“False, my dear Virgil. I tried to warn you. Sure,” The guardian rolled his hand as he spoke, “I am forced to have a round-about way of speaking my truths, it is just part of my consequences it seems. But how else was I going to get you to listen to me after the others fed you lies about me? I do sincerely apologize for my other half being rough, though. I cannot quite.. Control.. Him.” The guardian tilted his bowler hat down to guiltily hide his eyes, regret briefly twisting his expression.

Finally the Guardian stood, dusting himself off as if his immaculate attire had acquired dust from just existing in his apartment. “I needed my physical body to reach yours and make our soul connection strong again, so that my soul could reach yours. However.. The pain I caused you was far from my intention. I am deeply regretful that it came down to.. That awful encounter.

“To answer your question though, Virgil, I am here because I created ‘here’. A realm made to form this illusion of being home, sweet home, just on the corner of the little street you had come to live on for the past year. It is all my doing. Where you stand is simply an illusion only you and I can access, a manipulation of your dreams and memories. The only place where the real me can talk to you mostly unhindered.” The guardian gestured to his surroundings.

“It takes only one person to flip your life on it’s head, a matter of hours to make the decision of a lifetime, and a matter of days to have completely changed your life’s direction,” He turned to Virgil, and looked him straight in the eyes, feeling distant and lost.

“And only a matter of years to succumb to the depression of the lonely consequences..”

Virgil blinked at that. The sad, longing tone had him thrown for a loop; it almost felt like the Guardian wasn't even quite talking to Virgil. “I-What..? I.. I don’t understand.”

The Guardian shook his head, snapping out of it and refocusing himself. "Nevermind that. It is time I talked to you for real, if you will have me?" The Guardian held out a hand politely, though there was no real expectation for Virgil to take it.

After a pause, Virgil gave a slight nod, still suspicious of the other's intent. The Guardian returned the nod, and his hand fell to his side.

“I am limited to the time that you rest and for now I will not be able to explain myself thoroughly, so, I ask you to understand that I do not expect you to trust me when I am done. I honestly do not expect you to ever trust me. With the mistakes I have made, I firmly believe I would not deserve it.”

Virgil blinked in surprise, not having expected his captor to admit to his faults straight off the bat.

“Okay.. Well, we’re here, might as well hear your side of the story. So.. Shoot.” Virgil said lightly, distrust and suspicion still evident in his tone and stance.

“I would assume at this point you are well aware of how the story you have been told paints me as the villain, a mastermind seeking power, immortality, and revenge? At least, that is what I am led to believe is still the story, it has been many years since I have heard the tale first hand… And... Well. Would that not be so lovely?” Virgil made a face, eyes narrowing in confusion.

“I am serious. Life would be so much easier if it was all black and white, true or false, good and bad, would it not? If those who meant well knew everything and those malicious few could not corrupt anything?” The Guardian frowned a bit, frustrated with his words that couldn’t seem to cooperate with him.

“Would it not be lovely if I could talk to you without fighting to keep from turning every honest thought into a question or theoretical statement just to let it be said? That my words could hold a meaning not forcibly disguised in the forms of fables and riddles?” The Guardian looked down lamely, his words tapering off in agitation. For a moment, Virgil waited as the Guardian was silent, contemplative. Then, the next moment the Guardian’s face scrunched up in sadness and his words were soft as he placed a hand over his golden wrist markings.

“My story is complicated, and twisted with shades of grey. One could say what I did was an attempt to keep you safe, another could say that what I did was outlandish and impulsive, and stupid. But no one will be able to tell you that what I did went according to the plan I had... at first. No one will tell you that my intention was to save you, to keep your fate safe. No one will tell you that my plan was ruined. Because there is no longer anyone who remembers what happened that night except for me,”

The Guardian’s eyes flicked up to meet the ravenette’s, a hurt look passing over his face as he continued. His steady voice now just barely trembled with uncertainty as he continued.

“No one but me and the soul who wants so desperately for everyone to forget. The soul who ripped my own in two to bury the secret, and ruin you and I both.”

“My final warning is this: Beware of the man who carries the world on his shoulders unflinchingly, he will be watching you closely. You have immunity to his power thanks to our connection, you might use this knowledge well to find the truth that lies in plain sight. However, your fate lies in the decisions you chose to make with this knowledge, I can only warn you of what might come.” The Guardian nodded solemnly, choosing to finish his cryptic warning there.

Virgil stood there, reeling with the information. Sure, he definitely wasn’t completely convinced he could trust this cryptic stranger, Guardian? Foe? Friend? Virgil wasn’t really sure what to call him anymore. But damn, his life was already so fucking crazy, this was all just fucking crazy! He could just be dreaming for all he knew.

But… Deep inside, he was hoping he wasn’t.

This was, well. This wasn’t what he’d been expecting to hear when facing the man whose, er, body? Had originally tried to strangle him? Now he’d heard his sob story and, well, Virgil wasn’t that easy to fool, but he’d also been told that it wasn’t expected that he’d trust the guy even in the end and he didn’t really want to.

He’d been on the path to death for so long, and then just two days ago everything had changed. So much was happening, it was frankly exhausting. What the fuck was he, some book protagonist? Couldn’t he get a little time to think about all this before he went crazy?

Still, something under all his incredulity begged to hear the guardian out. He vaguely wondered how Stockholm Syndrome worked before he gave in a little. What difference did a little more crazy make in his life at this point?

“Fine, I’ll heed your warning, or whatever the fuck. But only if you can tell me what you mean when you said that this guy ripped your, uh, soul? In two.” Virgil huffed, partially relaxing. It was odd how comforting he found it to be, floating in this weird feeling imaginary world, where he could interact with objects that weren’t real. It felt like he was really standing in his home, and yet it was just built from memory.

The guardian’s solemn expression formed into a grim smile, eyes distant once more before nodding. “I will do the best that my words will allow.” Virgil nodded, and waited for the now very familiar stranger to gather his words and take a breath. Then he began, his markings lightly flashing gold.

“You find yourself whole one day, as you have always been. To be whole of body, whole of mind, both human and guardian in nature. To have conscious thought and control over your whole physical being and soul..

“You find that yourself and others of the winged variety are capable of separating your soul from your being, though only the most Elite can do it well. You find out the family you made would soon be in danger. You then find yourself lost and alone when you once had a home to call your own.

“You find yourself knowing a truth, a perilous truth. Your home is in shambles now that you are gone, yet they do not know it. This truth is at fault, but the blame is not fully your own in a world built on lies.

“The source of truth tucks itself into blankets of grey, drawing itself further from discovery with each passing day. Now only you know the truth. The source of the truth finds you, it seeks to hide you too.

“You find yourself split one day, as you have never been before. Forced apart from the body, trapped within the mind. Guardian in nature, to have conscious thought and your dying soul trapped within, a false mind piloting the puppeteered confines of a broken body with a blind goal.”

“You find you cannot control what you used to, you are a prisoner to a body that is no longer your own, mostly unconscious to the world around it. Crazed by the false emotions that fuel it.”

“The you that used to be is no longer, and has not been for over a hundred years. The world that knew you knows not of what you’ve become. Knows not of the shackles that bind you.

“The you that used to be is no longer, and will never be again.” The Guardian finished, hesitant yellow eyes meeting Virgil’s carefully. Phantom goosebumps trail down Virgil's arms as the final sentence strikes a cord in him.

Virgil found he really wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that, the rawness in the other’s tone spoke volumes of the sore spot they’d reached.

“Your body rests, but your mind also needs time to process today. I shall see you when you next rest, though only if you wish to seek me. Rest well knowing that you will not be scooped from your safety once more, as I hope I’m never to do so again. And...” The guardian paused, considering their next words very carefully.

“I know it is selfish to ask... but, I hope and wish that Thomas is alright, after all this time... Do take care of him, would you?”

Virgil paused and stared, finding only concern and longing in the guardian’s expression. And, well, fuck. What a way to pull at a guy’s heartstrings.

“Er, yes. Yeah. I’ll try my best.” Virgil gave his signature mock salute, the Guardian tipping his hat in return.

“Trying is all I could ever ask of you, Virgil. Rest well, you will need it.” And with that final sentence, the world around Virgil gently grew dark, and he sunk into the comforting arms of sleep.

Despite it all, Virgil still found his mind vaguely conscious. Sluggish at best, but awake nonetheless.

He figured it was likely some lingering effect from the Guardian’s dream realm, but didn’t dwell on it. His life had way too much else going on to be debating the side effects gained from Guardian powers.

First, he’d been pretty damn convinced two days ago that he was going to be a goner by the end of the month. Completely resigned to die believing that his very existence was scorned by the world he’d been unwillingly born into.

Then Patton had stumbled onto his shitty apartment’s roof, found him in all of his resigned and depressed glory, and changed his life forever.

They’d mostly skipped the whole ‘Human nature is a series of life, death, and rebirth’ spiel that guardians were known to give in these situations because... Well, It wasn’t like they’d really had time to address it before the truth about his soul had come out. That he wasn’t exactly human to begin with.

Virgil didn’t think that Guardians had ever had a situation like his before. There wasn’t a protocol for comforting a kidnapped guardian soul. It’d never been a possibility before!

So it wasn’t surprising then, that Virgil didn’t have any better of a time processing it.

His whole life, all that he’d known to be true, all that he’d believed in? Everything had been uprooted and turned on its head. He’d apparently been living a life that was not supposed to be.

Perhaps for the first time in two days, Virgil realized that the thought of his death at the end of the month had not been consistently worming into his brain. It had once been something he could never seem to stop thinking about.

The death indicated by his soul timer was now perhaps the farthest thing from his mind.

Perhaps the strangest thing so far was that he wasn’t alone anymore. He’d possibly had more physical contact with other people in the short two(three?) days since this adventure started then he’d had in the past 16 years.

And wasn’t it just the cherry on top that he’d also gotten nearly choked out by the very guardian accused of kidnapping his soul in the first place? And now he was considering trusting the damn guy.

Virgil hollowly wondered why he even cared.

Why did he care about staying alive now when he’s spent his whole life believing he never would? Up until two days ago, that belief had still been true. But now? Avoiding death was the goal, Logan had stated as much.

Really, would Virgil lose anything by trusting the banished guardian? Even if the guardian was trying to trick Virgil and got him killed, what difference would it make? That’d always been the goal before. What did he, Virgil, really have to lose?

If it happened that Virgil lived past his twentieth birthday, if he became a guardian like he was supposed to be in the first place. Would he want that? Did he want that?

He wasn’t sure. Didn’t know if he ever had been.

His life had been built on resignation to the inevitable. Nothing seemed to motivate him towards liking or hating that possibility. He was just that.

Indifferent.

And wasn’t that just the greatest revelation of the night? Finding out that you’re indifferent to living or dying.

Once this was all over, if Virgil lived that long, he would make a note to see a therapist. He knew very well that this kind of mindset was unhealthy to keep. It just couldn’t be helped that the nineteen years he’d lived with this particular affliction couldn’t be fixed by a few extra hugs and comforting words.

Even if he didn’t like the fact that death sounded like the more peaceful option.

His thoughts paused, mentally sighing at the downward spiral he’d caught himself in. It was tiring, and going nowhere.

‘For now,’ he decided, ‘I’m just going to see how this plays out. The Guardian said that none of the others remember the truth, or whatever. So, It’s a ‘he said-they said’ situation right now...’

‘I’ll have to keep an eye out for the guy that he warned me about, then. Who knows if he's as dangerous as The Guardian made him out to be. It’s hard to tell with the weird way he has to talk..’

Virgil paused again, a realization striking him. If he could have groaned, he would have. Not once had he been given or even remembered to ask for the name of said Guardian. What was he supposed to call the rogue Guardian now? He couldn’t just keep calling him The Guardian!

Amidst the disbelief of such a slip up, a foreign yet familiar feeling prodded questioningly at his conscious mind. Adding confusion into the mix of emotions, he returned the feeling with a questioning thought of his own.

He briefly heard the Guardian’s whispy voice once more, now acting with permission.

“You may call me Janus”

Then all at once, Virgil woke up.

Chapter Nine

#sanders sides #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #lamp/calm #LAMPR/CALMR #LAMP/CALM + remy ‘sleep’ sanders #tw angst #tw long post #long fic #thelostguardianau #morally grey deceit #for the time being #the aim is that he reach sympathetic but trust aint that easy

454 notes · View notes

junetuesday · 4 years

Text

sweetener - [seventeen]

The Match

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader - uni AU

Word Count: 8905ish

Warnings: a sprinkling of smut and a healthy helping of whump (hospital setting, description of injuries)

A/N: for the anon who asked if they were going to leave the bedroom, this one’s for you (im jk this was planned from the start lmao) pls dont hurt me love you all!!! [not properly proofread bc im tired whoops]

Updates: ??????

As soon as you pressed the home button on your phone you immediately regretted it, fumbling to turn your phone over to stop the light of the screen burning your retinas off. One eye screwed shut, you carefully tilted the device so you could peep at the time without blinding yourself and lighting up the entire room.

3:47

Ahhh, lovely.

Despite the fact that you’d gone to sleep relatively early, just getting up after Tom’s nap and making dinner before getting ready for bed again, you still weren’t ready to wake up just yet, so it was a great relief to see that you still had hours left to sleep before you had to get up for Tom’s rugby match that afternoon. You could tell it was still early anyway, judging by the light coming in around the curtains; still an artificial yellow from the streetlamp outside Tom’s bedroom window.

You sighed as you snuggled back under the covers, turning over onto your right side to face Tom. You could just about see him in the half-light, the outline of his left shoulder and the back of his hair all messed up as he lay with his back to you, still asleep. You couldn’t quite make out the writing on the back of his t-shirt but you knew what it said anyway, because you had the same one at home. It was from Carnage last year - a bar crawl where the t shirt served as your entry to several bars and clubs (most of which you wouldn’t end up actually going to because you had to be in the last club by 1 and you always seemed to get distracted in the first few places). The date and theme was printed on the back of the t shirt, along with a list of bars and innuendo-laden “tasks” to be ticked off throughout the night. You’d seen last night when he got changed for bed that Tom’s didn’t have anything ticked off, but it did have several penises in various colours and sizes drawn on it in permanent marker. It wasn’t particularly tasteful, but some of them were remarkably detailed, so you had to give the artist(s) some credit. You’d wondered aloud whether you’d ever been in the same bar at the same time without knowing it, and Tom had pointed out that you must have been in the union at the same time loads of times before you met. That was probably true, and you said that it was highly likely you had bumped into each other, or been in the queue for food at the same time or something like that without actually speaking, to which Tom said no, because he’d have remembered you if he saw you. You didn’t think that was strictly true, but it was sweet all the same.

Right now though, you had forgotten all about the annotations on his t shirt, so you wiggled closer to his sleeping form, the warmth of his body drawing you in. Not wanting to wake him, you carefully scooted in behind him, draping your arm around his middle and curling your other arm up between your chest and his back, warming it up nicely after its excursion over the edge of the bed to check your phone. Tom didn’t move at first, but after a moment you felt him shifting, his hand coming to rest on your forearm across his waist. He just hummed sleepily, not really awake, relaxing back into your embrace. You hummed back, pressing a kiss to his shoulder and letting your eyes drift shut again.

You weren’t sure if you properly went back to sleep or if you were just kind of floating in the space in between asleep and awake - either way you were warm and safe and snuggled, and you didn’t have to get up for hours yet, so who cared if you didn’t go right back to sleep straight away - but after a while you felt Tom moving again, turning over to face you. Keeping your arm around his waist, you shuffled back to give him space to roll over, tucking yourself back into his chest as soon as you could. His arms wrapped around your body, holding you close with your face pressed to his chest. You breathed in deeply, taking in the warm, sleepy smell emanating from him.

“Hello,” he mumbled, his voice deep and raspy with sleep.

You just hummed back, sighing contentedly as you felt him kiss the top of your head. You would have happily stayed like that, cocooned under the duvet and Tom’s arms, just on the verge of sleep - only it was kind of hard to breathe with your face smushed against his chest. You tried to turn your face to the side, but with Tom’s arm on one side and the bed on the other there wasn’t really space.

“....I can’t breathe.”

Tom chuckled sleepily, his arms loosening their grip on you so you could move back enough to give you space to breathe. He yawned as you lay your head on the pillow beside his - which made you yawn too, which made you both smile tiredly. Even in the low light, even at gone four in the morning, he looked extremely cute, with tired eyes and messy hair and the faintest of smiles tugging at his lips. Your face so close to his, you barely had to tilt your head to kiss him, your lips capturing his in a soft kiss.

One kiss turned to two, to three, each as soft and gentle as the last, as though if you didn’t put too much into it then maybe you could still stay half asleep - and to be fair, it kind of worked. Your arm snaked around his neck as he shifted on top of you, your other hand lazily squeezing his bum through his pyjama bottoms. Neither of you spoke, just fumbling hands and languid kisses as only the parts of you that were absolutely necessary slowly stirred to life.

Before long both of your pyjama bottoms were lost in the sheets, your bodies slotting together effortlessly as Tom pushed into you. Your moans were low, raspy; your voice not ready to be used at this early hour as he thrust in and out of you, slowly and deeply. You wrapped your arms around him, hands splayed across his shoulder blades, as he pressed lazy kisses to your neck. You still weren’t really awake, all you were aware of was him, on you, around you, in you. It wasn’t even about getting off, it was just about being close to him, in the silence of the early morning, as if there was no one else in the world except you and him. Only soft moans and heavy breaths passed between you, his mouth hot on your neck and your legs wrapped around him, your heels pushing him to go deeper inside you.

You felt him grunt against your neck before he moved to kiss your lips, his warm breath tingling across your skin before your lips connected. His back and shoulders began to tense under your palms, and you felt his body stiffen on top of yours as his thrusts started to quicken. He pulled back from the kiss then, resting his forehead against yours so when you looked up at him all you could see make out was his eyes tight shut and his nose pinching, his face twitching slightly as he took those last few steps over the edge. You felt his laboured breath fan across your face as he released inside you, a groan that was as heavy with tiredness as it was pleasure. Slowly grinding deep inside you with small, idle movements, Tom buried his face in the crook of your neck as he caught his breath. You rubbed his back gently in a similar rhythm, the fingers of your right hand weaving through the curls at the back of his neck.

You weren’t too fussed about your own release, you could honestly have gone back to sleep then and there - plus you were pretty confident that Tom would even the stakes at some point in the day, whether that was before or after the match, or later than night when you got home after the post-match night out. You only wished you’d had the foresight to use a condom, so that way you could just pop it in the bin and save the clean up for later - but alas, you did not.

“I really don’t wanna get up,” you whispered against Tom’s shoulder.

“Don’t then,” he murmured back, voice muffled by your skin.

“I kinda need to…”

There was a pause, and then Tom simply said:

“No.”

“Um… what?”

With a tired groan, Tom rolled off you and sat up, taking off his t shirt and holding it out for you to take.

“Just use that and sort it out later.”

Hm. Did you want to use his penis-decorated bar crawl t shirt to clean his come off your inner thighs? No. But did you want to get up and go upstairs to the bathroom right this second? Also no.

“... yeah, okay, fine.”

T shirt tossed in the general direction of Tom’s laundry basket, the two of you were soon sound asleep once again. When you awoke several hours later, you were not much more inclined to get up than you had been at four, especially once you heard the wind and rain lashing against the windows. But, Tom’s stomach was rumbling, and you needed to pee, so you forced yourselves to push back the covers and find some clothes to throw on so you could properly start your day.

You joined Tom in the kitchen once you’d freshened up, pleasantly surprised to find him making coffee for you, himself, and Harrison, who was currently rummaging through a cupboard.

“I’m assuming you don’t want chocolate protein porridge?” Tom said as he handed you your mug.

“What even is that?”

“Porridge with chocolate protein powder in,” Harrison answered for him, having seemingly found what he was looking for in the cupboard - which, funnily enough, was chocolate protein powder.

“Oh, um, nah I think I’m good with toast.”

“Toast it is.”

While Tom set about making you toast and Harrison started making porridge for him and Tom, you tried to find a spot to stand in the kitchen where you wouldn’t be in the way of the two boys but that was also far enough away from the back door that you weren’t going to freeze from the wind whistling around its edges. Eventually you settled on hovering in the door to the hallway, leaning against the doorframe and taking a sip of your coffee. It was just a touch too hot to drink yet, but even with your now burnt tongue you could taste something different about it.

“...is there vanilla in this?”

“Hm, what?” Tom glanced over at you from where he was getting out a plate for you. “Oh yeah, I got a thing of syrup from work.”

You followed his vague gesture over to the corner where the kettle sat on the counter, surrounded by pots filled with tea, coffee and sugar, a plate with old tea bags and spoons on that you wondered if they ever actually cleaned or if they just threw the tea bags in the bin every now and then, and the newest addition: a large pump bottle of vanilla syrup.

“Oh sweet, thanks.”

Tom just smiled at you in reply, leaning against the counter while he waited for the toaster to pop, talking to Harrison about the match that afternoon and sipping on his own coffee. They talked about tactics and other members of the team that you knew nothing about, so you just stood and listened as they chatted. Harrison was remarkably animated for someone who’d just woken up - though you supposed maybe he hadn’t just gotten up, but you had and he was being very loud and it was a bit much for you.

Perhaps, though, it was less about the fact that he was very chatty - he was always very chatty, after all - and more about the fact that you were still annoyed with him about the situation with Liv, so everything he did got on your nerves. Not loads, you still considered him a friend, and sometimes you would forget about it altogether, but then you’d remember ‘oh right, I’m angry at you’ and he’d start to bother you again. It was more out of principle than anything - Liv was your best friend, so Girl Code stated that you had to hate whoever she hated, especially exes (were they even exes? Ex-ish-es??? You weren’t sure, but the point still stood). Still, he was also your boyfriend’s best friend and housemate, so you had to be civil if nothing else.

“So are you nervous to play?” you asked them both as you moved into the living room to eat, you and Tom on one sofa and Harrison on the other.

“Nah,” Tom shrugged as Harrison shook his head, his mouth too full to speak. “More excited, like it’s been ages since we played properly.”

“Yeah, should be fun,” Harrison said thickly in between spoonfuls.

“That’s good. Does it make a difference that it’s raining?”

All three of you glanced over at the living room window, watching the rain pelting against the glass.

“Kinda,” Tom said, “makes everything more slippery I guess like it’s harder to keep your grip on the ball and stuff but obviously it affects the other team too so it kinda balances out.”

“Makes sense,” you nodded, thinking about how you weren’t looking forward to going out in the rain at all, never mind running around in it for eighty minutes. “Is it covered? Like where I’ll be standing?”

“Nope,” Harrison shook his head, popping the p sound.

“Sorry. Bring an umbrella.”

You scowled at Tom jokingly, taking an overly aggressive bite of your toast. “Fine - I’ll ask Madison to bring one with her.”

Madison had graciously agreed to come watch the match with you, so you wouldn’t be stood there by yourself. Of course, she’d said yes before this torrential downpour began, but a promise was a promise so there was no going back now.

“Oh, is she coming too?” Harrison asked.

“Mmhmm,” you nodded.

“Cool - what about Liv?”

???

“Erm, no, I don’t think so…”

“Oh, okay.” He paused, taking a gulp of his coffee. “She alright? Haven’t heard from her in a while.”

??????

You chewed on your toast slowly, considering how to respond to that.

“What do you mean?”

“I text her like a week ago and she hasn’t replied?”

Uhhhhhhhhhhhh yes, and???

“Do you really have no idea why she might not have text you back?”

You could almost see the cogs turning in Harrison’s brain as he thought for a moment, then shook his head. “No?” He looked at Tom, who promptly became very interested in his breakfast and wouldn’t make eye contact with either of you.

“Right.” You set your empty plate down on the coffee table, holding your mug in both hands as you sat cross-legged on the sofa. “Friday before last, what happened?”

Harrison looked at Tom again, but he was still hyperfocused on his porridge, so he just shrugged. “I dunno?”

“Refreshers week.”

…

“The night you all came to pres at mine and we played Jenga.”

“Oh yeah, yeah, that night. What about it?”

Was he just playing dumb? Was he just dumb, like as a person??

“You didn’t, I don’t know, get with anyone?”

“Uhh…. yes? Did I?” He looked off into space as he thought about it, then nodded. “Yeah, no, I did.”

You just looked at him, waiting for him to connect the dots.

“...so?”

“What do you mean, ‘so?’?!” You felt a bit bad about how harsh that came out, because he did seem genuinely confused, but still - ‘so?’? Come on, man.

“What’s that got to do with Liv not texting me back? Wait, how do you know -- oh, did she see?”

“...yes,” you sighed, exasperated but pleased you seemed to be finally getting somewhere.

“Oh. That’s awkward.”

“Yeah.” No shit.

“But we’re not like, together or “exclusive” or anything?” he frowned, doing air quotes with one hand when he said exclusive.

Ah, so Mads was right. As usual.

“...I don’t think Liv knew that.”

“Oh. Oh.”

“Yeah,” you said plainly, not sure what to say next. It was your turn to look at Tom for assistance this time, but he was still resolutely Eating Breakfast and Not Looking. At least he’s consistent, you supposed.

“Should I like- should I call her?”

“Honestly, I wouldn’t.”

“Fuck,” Harrison groaned, and you almost felt sorry for him in a weird way. “I didn’t think- I didn’t know she thought-”

“Yeah,” you sighed, “I thought that might be the case.”

“Can you like, apologise to her for me then? If you don’t think I should speak to her?”

“Yeah, sure.” You’d have to think long and hard about how to approach that particular conversation, but it was only fair.

“Thanks.”

The atmosphere in the living room was a little tense for the rest of the time it took for the boys to finish eating, and you kind of wanted to make an excuse to leave and start getting ready, but fortunately Harrison inhaled the rest of his breakfast and went off upstairs to shower, leaving you alone with Tom - who quickly regained his ability to look people in the eye once he’d left.

Once you and Tom were finished eating, you tidied up the kitchen a little - it only seemed fair for you to do the dishes seeing as Tom had made you breakfast - while you waited for the bathroom to be free. By the time you had showered (together, and you were right, Tom did repay you for earlier - several times over, infact) it was time for the three of you to go on campus for the match. You parted ways once you arrived, the two boys going to warm up and you going to meet Madison for a coffee to pass the time before kick-off.

By the time you’d finished filling her in on what Harrison had said about Liv, it was time to make your way over to the playing fields, hot chocolates in hand to keep you warm. There were quite a few people there to watch, more than you expected, huddled under umbrellas around the perimeter of the pitch. It was still pouring rain, pelting down in icy sheets, making you extremely glad you were wrapped up in a jumper, coat, and oversized scarf, rather than in black shorts and a tight red t shirt like Tom and the rest of his teammates were.

You saw him looking around as he walked out onto the pitch, raising a hand to wave at you once he spotted you in the crowd. You couldn’t really wave back with your drink in one hand and umbrella in the other, but you lifted your cup and smiled widely instead which was close enough.

The game soon got under way, and as predicted you didn’t really know what was going on most of the time, but that was okay. The atmosphere was fun despite the horrid weather, and you were mostly just watching Tom anyway. He was in his element out there; him, Harrison and another guy you guessed was the captain directing the rest of the team a lot of the time. You were pleased to see that, as promised, he didn’t really get in the middle of the scrums, and he didn’t seem to get tackled that much either. A few times you thought he was about to get bowled over by someone, but then one of his own team managed to head them off just in time - which was all good, really, considering he was quite a bit smaller than most of the other players. Not that he wasn’t well built - he was, and as expected you did enjoy watching him running about in his little shorts - but some of the other players were huge, almost as broad as they were tall, so you didn’t like to think what would happen if one of them were to barrel into him.

Luckily, the upside of being smaller was that Tom was considerably faster, which meant he could dodge any tackles that his teammates failed to protect him from. That seemed to be the set up, as far as you could work out - the bigger players protected the smaller ones so that they could nip in and get the ball where it needed to be.

By the time the first half was coming to a close the scoreline was even at 15 all, and every single player on the pitch was caked in mud. Only small sections of the grass remained green, the majority of the field turned to a sludgy brown mess.

From your spot near the goal line, you couldn’t really see what was going on as the players set up for a scrum at the opposite side and end of the pitch. A scrum, as far as you remembered from what Tom had told you, was used to restart the game after a stoppage, like if someone had broken a rule or the ball had become “unplayable” (whatever that meant). You just recognised it as the thing that Ross got stuck in upside down in that one episode of Friends, that looked like a pretty good way to get your neck broken. Thankfully, Tom didn’t actually engage in the scrum, he just hovered at the back and when the ball emerged from underneath the mass of bodies he’d grab it, pass it to Harrison, and then he would kick it off somewhere else (well, either them or their opposing counterparts, but ideally it would be them).

You craned your neck as the ball was thrown into the middle of the two teams, shouts erupting from the players as they slammed into each other in an attempt to gain possession of the ball. After a moment you saw someone in red peel off from the back of the group, ball in hand.

“Is that Tom?” you said to Madison, standing on your tiptoes to try and see better.

“I think so…” She trailed off as you watched him look around for someone to pass to, finding no one nearby.

“Oh!” You gasped as one of the opposition, an absolute unit in a blue jersey, appeared as if from nowhere, barrelling full speed towards Tom, who seemed to be slowing down. You held your breath as he got closer and closer, Tom nonthewiser as he continued to look around for a teammate in the right position. You couldn’t make out the words over the sounds of the crowd and the rain, but you heard a shout echo across the pitch, making Tom turn his head and look over his shoulder. Darting right, he changed course at the last second, and you breathed a sigh of relief as he cleared the reach of the opposing player, their hand just missing the back of his shirt as they reached out to tackle him. Tom sped up once more, putting distance between him and his assailant -- and then you couldn’t see him anymore. Maybe his foot slipped in the mud, maybe the other guy was closer than you realised, but all of a sudden he was on the ground, the other player tumbling on top of him. Players from both teams converged in on them, a boy in blue grabbing the ball and streaking back up towards your end of the pitch.

“Can you see him?” your voice was panicked, but Madison didn’t seem to even hear you. She, and most everyone else, was watching as the boy with the ball ran almost the full length of the pitch, dodging this way and that before throwing himself at the goal line and scoring a try.

As celebratory cheers and shouts of disappointment erupted on and off the pitch, you peered across at the few people still gathered around the spot where you last saw Tom. Harrison was there now, bringing his fingers up to his mouth and whistling to get the referee’s attention. You huffed, frustrated that you couldn’t see or hear what was going on. Was Tom hurt? Or were they contesting the tackle? Or the try? It would be easier if you understood the rules, sure, but more than anything you just wanted to be able to see.

The players dispersed as the referee jogged over, and at last you caught a glimpse of Tom. You watched as Harrison held out a hand to help him up, only for Tom to pull his hand back sharply as soon as he lifted his arm to take it. That doesn’t look good. Harrison swapped hands and pulled Tom to his feet by the other arm, the two of them and the referee moving off to the side of the pitch.

“Should I go over?” you turned to Madison, chewing nervously on your bottom lip.

You didn’t want to overreact - tackling made up a large portion of the game, so of course players were often knocked down. Sometimes they needed a moment, and then they’d get back into it without the game even stopping. But they’d called the referee over, which made you think it was more than that - and then you saw Harrison jog back onto the pitch, followed by another player off the bench, and your heart sank.

“Yeah,” Mads nodded, holding out her hand to take your empty cup. “Go.”

She followed behind as you turned and weaved your way through the crowd, away from the pitch so you could get around to the other side. Frankly it was extremely inconvenient that they were carrying on playing, because it would have been far quicker to dart across the field, but alas that was not possible. By the time you got all the way around, Tom was walking into the small building at the side of the pitch that housed the changing rooms, followed closely by a first aider.

“Tom!” you called out as you and Madison followed them inside, making to follow them into the changing room - only it wasn’t Tom who answered you, it was the first aider.

“Sorry, you can’t come in here.”

“Oh, but-” you began, before you were cut off by Tom’s voice from behind the first aider.

“It’s okay, she’s my girlfriend.”

In a different situation, you might have gone all smiley and silly because Tom just referred to you as his girlfriend - like, obviously you knew you were, but hearing him say it to someone else was different, and especially when it was in a “so therefore she can do whatever she wants” kinda way. However, given the circumstances and the fact that you just wanted to know what the hell was going on, you just did a small, polite smile as if to say ‘please let me in, I'll be very well behaved’.

“Fine, whatever”, the first aider shrugged, turning around and following Tom into the changing room.

“I’ll wait here,” Mads called as you went in after them, stepping back to wait in the corridor.

Tom sat down gingerly on one of the benches in the middle of the room, holding his left elbow as if he was supporting the weight of his arm. He was soaking wet and covered in mud, his face flushed and brow furrowed, his jaw tense. He was breathing heavily, and you didn’t know if that was because he’d been running around for half an hour or because he was in pain - you suspected it might be a bit of both.

You stood off to the side, not wanting to be in the way as the first aider crouched down in front of Tom, setting his bag down between his feet .

“Is it your arm or your shoulder that hurts?” he asked as he searched through the bag.

“Shoulder,” Tom grunted.

The first aider took out an instant ice pack from his bag, bending and shaking it to activate the chemicals inside to make it cold as he got to his feet.

“Okay - stand up and put your arms down at your sides for me.”

Tom looked at him for a second with an expression that clearly said ‘absolutely not, please fuck off’, but he did as he was asked, letting out a slow, jagged breath as he lowered his arms to his sides. Even you could see from where you were standing that his left shoulder was sitting lower than his right, as though the weight of his arm was pulling it down.

“Can you raise your arms towards me?”

He lifted his arms slightly, his face scrunching up in pain almost immediately.

“Hurts,” he murmured through gritted teeth.

“And if you lift them out to the sides, does that hurt?”

Tom tried to lift his arms again, but again he groaned and clenched his jaw after just a few inches.

“Yup,” he nodded, lowering his arms. “Can confirm that hurts.”

“Okay, you can sit down,” the first aider gestured to the bench, handing Tom the ice pack once he sat down. “I’m just gonna have a feel of your shoulder, alright?”

You felt so useless just standing there, watching, and you really wanted to shout out stop, stop! because it was clearly painful to touch. Tom’s face was scrunched up again, his nostrils flaring as he took deep breaths in and out, but after a moment he opened one eye and looked over at you, chuckling weakly. You tried to smile back, but it felt all tight and forced, so instead you nibbled on your bottom lip anxiously.

“Okay,” the first aider stepped back after what felt like forever, taking the ice pack and putting it across Tom’s shoulder. “Can you hold that?”

“Erm,” Tom glanced at his shoulder, then down at his elbow, as if he didn’t want to stop supporting his arm to take the ice pack.

“I got it.”

You dropped your umbrella on the ground, moving over and sitting on the bench next to him. Tom gave you a small but grateful smile as you held the ice pack against his shoulder, careful not to apply too much pressure.

“So you’re gonna have to go for an x-ray I’m afraid. Could be a broken collarbone, dislocated shoulder, separated shoulder - hard to say which but there’s a fair bit of swelling already.”

“Fuuuck,” Tom groaned, his head dropping for a moment before he looked back up at the first aider again. “Right, okay.”

“Keep the ice on it until you get seen but take a break every twenty minutes, half an hour.”

You both nodded - icing was your responsibility now, you’d decided.

“Do you have someone to take you to the hospital?”

“Oh, uh-”

“I can drive you!” said a voice from outside the door, and you remembered that Madison was still waiting in the corridor.

You both laughed at her disembodied, albeit helpful, voice, though your smile quickly faded when Tom winced in pain with the movement.

“Cheers,” he sniffed, nodding to the first aider.

“No worries. Right, you guys better get going.”

That was a very good point, you realised, because the first half would surely have finished by now, which meant the rest of the team would soon descend on the changing room.

Taking the ice pack from you and holding it in his left hand, Tom showed you which of the lockers lining the walls was his so you could grab his bag for him before you made your way out into the corridor where Madison was waiting. The building was essentially just a corridor with a door onto the pitch on one end and a door to the carpark at the other, a changing room for the home team and one for the away team on either side.

“I’ll go get my car,” Mads said. “Meet you outside?”

“Cool, thanks.”

You and Tom moved away from the door to the pitch as players started streaming in, the thump of their boots on the concrete floor and the chatter of their voices quickly filling the small space.

“You okay?” you murmured, loud enough for Tom to hear over the noise of the two teams.

“Mmhm, yeah.”

He nodded, but everything about him was tense, his arm folded across his ribs as he held on tightly to his elbow to stop the weight of his arm pulling on his shoulder. You desperately wanted to give him a massive hug, but a) that would probably just hurt him and b) his team mates were right there.

In groups of twos and threes they stopped on their way into the changing room to ask what happened, to see if he was okay.

“Yeah, m’fine, fucked up my shoulder so m’gonna go get it checked out. My foot slipped in the mud, I guess.”

He had to repeat himself a few times until he’d spoken to all his teammates and his coach, but most of their responses were the same, variations on ‘ah shit’, ‘good luck’ and ‘let us know how you get on’, and eventually they’d all gone in, leaving the two of you alone in the corridor again. You moved closer to the door to the car park so you could see when Madison pulled up, setting Tom’s bag down next to the chair by the door. You still wanted to hug him, and though his teammates weren’t there anymore there was still the issue of hurting him if you tried, so you decided against it.

“So is that what happened?” you asked. “You just slipped?”

“Yeah,” Tom sighed as he slumped down into the chair. “He didn’t even touch me, I just, pfftt, decked it.”

“Oh but he landed on you, right?”

“Yeah he like, fell over me.”

“Oh.” you nodded, not sure what to say. “Want some water?”

Tom sighed again, then nodded. “Yeah, please - there should be a bottle in my bag.”

Propping his elbow up on the arm of the seat, Tom took the bottle from you with his other hand, pulling the stopper up with his teeth and taking a long drink. You watched as he downed the majority of the bottle in one go, slightly startled until you remembered that he’d played half a game of rugby, so yeah you’d probably be pretty thirsty too.

“Thanks,” he held the bottle out to you once he’d gulped down the last few drops.

“Do you want some more?” you asked as you took it from him, looking around for a water fountain or something to refill the bottle.

“Nah I’m good, thanks.”

“Okay,” you nodded, putting the bottle back in his bag. “Is it really sore?”

That was kind of a stupid question, but you didn’t really know what else to say.

“Yeah, it like, aches all the time and then when I move my arm I get a sort of shooting pain across here,” he explained, gesturing to his collarbone.

“Oh. Shit.”

Fantastic input, very helpful. Tom just sighed, nodding. You felt like you should say something else, something more comforting, but you didn’t really know what to say, so instead you just looked out of the glass section of the door to see if Madison was there yet - and thankfully, she was just pulling in.

You helped Tom into the car, which took longer than expected because at first he got into the passenger seat but then you realised the seatbelt would have to go across his left shoulder so he had to get out, go around the other side and get in the back, and then you had to help him put his seatbelt on, but you got there in the end, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek before you climbed out of the backseat and into the front so you could give Madison directions to the hospital. Neither of you knew where you were going, but you looked it up on your phone and thankfully it wasn’t too far away. The short journey was quiet; none of you really spoke, and every now and then you looked back at Tom, but each time he was just looking out of the window, holding his arm and looking tired.

“Thanks,” he said to Madison as he got out of the car once you arrived at the hospital. “Sorry if I got mud all over your car.”

“No worries - text me if you need me to pick you guys up later or anything.”

You nodded and thanked her too, taking Tom’s bag out of the backseat before she drove away - you’d decided it was easier if she just dropped you off, seeing as you thought you might be waiting a while.

It wasn’t too busy in the waiting room, but the receptionist who signed Tom in said it might take an hour or more before he got assessed, so the two of you settled in to wait - well, as settled as you could be on plastic hospital waiting room seats.

“Want me to get you anything?” You asked, looking around for signs of a cafe or somewhere to get food. “I think I saw a vending machine on the way in…”

“Nah,” Tom shook his head. “Just- no, thanks.”

“Okay,” you shrugged. “...are you warm enough?”

You felt like his mother asking him that, but frankly it was February and he was soaked through, wearing only shorts and a short sleeved top, and the ice pack wouldn’t have helped, and the waiting room wasn’t exactly toasty (though it was considerably warmer than it was outside).

“Erm… not really,” he admitted.

“You can use my scarf as a blanket if you want?”

Tom chuckled as you started to unwrap the large scarf around your neck, but shook his head. “I’ve got trackies in my bag, I think.”

Oh yeah, the clothes he wore to drive on campus. Duh.

“...okay yeah, that makes more sense.”

You found a toilet for him to change in, and were about to hand him his bag and go wait outside when he stopped you.

“I uh, I think you might have to help me.”

“Oh right, yeah, because you can’t use your arms.” Dummy.

The toilet was one big accessible stall, so at least you knew no one was going to come in, and technically it was gender neutral so you were allowed to be in there, but you still hoped no one saw you go in there with him. Not that you were doing anything wrong, in fact you were dressing him as opposed to undressing him (which admittedly felt a little strange to do), but still. Helping him change out of shorts and into sweatpants was easy enough, you just had to co-ordinate your movements so he didn’t fall over when you tried to get his foot through the cuffed bottoms, and thankfully his hoodie had a zip so all you had to do was support his left arm while he put the right sleeve on, and then you just left it open, the left side draped loosely over his shoulder.

“Thanks,” he muttered as you sat back down in the waiting room, carefully placing the ice pack back on his shoulder. “Sorry.”

“S’okay,” you shrugged, smiling to show you really didn’t mind. Was it a little awkward being eye level with his knob in a hospital bathroom? Yes, but sometimes these things happen.

“So, what’d you think of the match - before this, obviously.”

You laughed, shaking your head - the match seemed like hours ago now. “Yeah, it was good. Not a fan of this bit though.”

“Yeah, that’s fair,” he chuckled. “I’m not too big on it myself. Don’t think I’ll do this next time.”

“Does it still hurt as much?”

You surveyed him as he thought for a moment. His breathing was more normal now, and he wasn’t as red in the face, but his body was still tense, and every now and then his face would contort in pain, especially when he moved a certain way.

“Yeah,” he nodded, “Kinda more now, actually?”

“Makes sense, I guess, like adrenaline’s wearing off?”

“Yeah.”

Silence fell over the pair of you once more, and yet again you found yourself feeling like a bit of a spare part. You wanted to help him, to make him feel better, you just didn’t know how, and you didn’t like it.

“You sure you don’t want me to get you a drink, or some crisps or something?”

“No I’m fine,” Tom shook his head, turning to look at you. “Just- just stay here?”

His hair was starting to dry now, all curly and a little frizzy from the rain, he had dried mud on his cheek, and you were pretty sure he was pouting - all in all, it was a little inappropriate for him to be being cute at a time like this - but then again, when wasn’t he being cute? You didn’t have much choice, then, but to nod.

“Yeah. ‘course.”

You put your arm around the back of his chair, leaning back into your own to try and get comfortable. Tentatively at first, wary of hurting him, you began to fiddle with his hair, damp strands curling around your fingers. You looked at him out of the corner of your eye to make sure you weren’t accidentally leaning on his shoulder or anything, or if he looked uncomfortable with you playing with his hair in public, but all you saw was him closing his eyes and leaning his head into your hand, so you figured it was okay.

It was over an hour later when a nurse in green scrubs emerged from a side corridor, Tom’s file in hand, and called him in to be assessed. You hesitated, unsure of the protocol here - could you go in with him? Tom didn’t even pause, just got up and started walking towards the nurse, so you looked at them for clarification.

“Can I-”

“Yeah sure,” he nodded, “I don’t mind if you don’t?”

He looked at Tom, who didn’t seem to have even considered the possibility that you wouldn’t be coming in with him.

“What? Oh, yeah, she can come.”

“Okay, cool.”

You picked up your stuff and followed the two of them through the door, down a corridor with a series of examination bays separated by blue curtains. The studs on Tom’s boots clacked loudly against the floor as he walked, leaving a trail of mud and grass behind him.

“So,” the nurse said as he closed the curtain separating Tom’s bay from the rest of the ward. “My name’s Mike, I’m going to have a look at your shoulder and see what’s going on. Have a seat on the bed for me.”

‘Bed’ was a bit of a stretch, it was more like a padded table, but either way Tom climbed onto it while you stood aside out of the way.

“So, rugby tackle, right?”

“Yeah,” Tom started to nod, then stopped himself. “Well...yeah.”

Technically he had fallen over and the other guy fell on top of him but yeah, it amounted to the same thing. Mike asked him a lot of questions about how he fell and how he landed, where it hurt most, if he’d ever had an injury like this before, etcetera etcetera, while you stood and watched. It was only when the nurse asked if he could take his shirt off so he could examine him properly that Tom looked over at you.

“Can you give me a hand?”

“Mmhmm, sure.”

You nodded, going over to help. The hoodie was easy enough to take off, but his shirt posed more of an issue, especially because it was so bloody tight. It was tight anyway, but with the swelling of his shoulder it was even tighter now. You hesitated, unsure how best to proceed.

“Good arm out first,” Mike prompted, evidently seeing you struggling.

“Right...”

Between you and Tom you managed to get his right arm free, and then it was just a matter of getting it over his head before you could just slip it off his left arm. It was a struggle, but you managed it, muttering ‘sorry sorry sorry’ when he took a deep breath in, a strained ‘ouch’ coming from between his gritted teeth.

Shirt successfully removed, you stepped back to let Mike examine him. His shoulder was even more swollen now, and without his shirt on you could see a lump protruding from the point of his shoulder - overall his left side was just rather misshapen compared to the right. You thought at first that he had bruises dotted across the right side of his collar bone, but then you realised that no, those were not rugby injuries, those were put there by you, and at that point you kind of wanted to go out and see if you could get yourself hit by an ambulance. Thankfully, Mike seemed to catch on quicker than you did, so he didn’t bring them up, but he must have seen them, so you were still mildly mortified.

You watched as he had Tom move his arm in various directions to see what he could and couldn’t do, what hurt and what didn’t, and then have a good feel of the joint. Just like before with the first aider, you found it pretty unpleasant to watch, because it was clear that it all hurt, but thankfully it was over pretty quickly. The nurse reiterated what the first aider had said; that he’d need an x-ray to confirm whether there were any broken bones, and then they’d go from there.

Pulling the curtain shut behind him, Mike left you and Tom to wait some more, but at least this time you were alone and it was a bit warmer than in the waiting room. Plus Tom looked more comfortable on his “bed”, and there was a somewhat comfortable chair for you to sit in, so that was nice.

You helped him back into his hoodie so he wasn’t just sitting there topless, and you noticed then that there was more of your handiwork littering his abdomen, and you could only hope and pray that Mike hadn’t noticed them, because if he had then you definitely were going to have to go and see about that ambulance.

“Sorry,” you muttered as you draped Tom’s hoodie over his shoulder. “That’s embarrassing.”

“What?”

You gestured to his stomach, and then his neck.

“Those. And those.”

“Oh.”

He obviously couldn’t see the ones on his neck, but he could see the others, his face turning slightly pink as he repositioned his hoodie over his torso.

“Never mind.”

The second round of waiting wasn’t nearly as long, thankfully, and before long a porter came to take Tom for an x-ray on his shoulder. You didn’t go with him this time - they said you couldn’t go into the room anyway so there was no point - so you got out your phone instead. You had a few texts from Madison and Harrison asking for updates, so you replied to Mads first - you thought you should let Tom decide what he wanted to tell Haz. The rest of the time was spent trying not to google ‘broken shoulder’ and ‘broken collarbone’, and you were just about to crack when the curtain was pulled back sharply.

“...once the doctor’s had a look at your results they’ll be round to see you, alright?” the porter was saying as he opened the curtain.

“Okay, cheers.”

“Hey,” you got to your feet, standing beside the bed as Tom sat down on the edge of it once the curtain was pulled shut again. “How you feeling?”

“Yeah, m’okay.” He was still holding his elbow tightly though, and when he looked up at you you could see in his eyes that he just wanted to go home and get into bed and sleep for a week (though you would suggest he showered first because he was still very muddy). “Thank you.”

“For what?” you frowned, pushing a stray curl away from his face.

“Y’know-” he started to shrug but immediately flinched in pain, his face scrunching up in frustration. “Fuck’s sake-”

You chuckled sympathetically, pressing a gentle kiss to his crumpled forehead. “You sure you don’t want anything?”

“Nah - actually, could you pass me my phone?”

You rummaged through his bag again until you found the little inside pocket, pulling out his phone and passing it to him. He held it gingerly in his left hand, flicking through his notifications tiredly.

“Ah shit, I should speak to my mum, she’s text me asking how the match went.”

“Yeah you should probably tell her you’re in hospital, might be an idea.”

“Ugh,” he groaned, “I’ll just wait until I know if it’s broken or whatever.”

Broken or whatever. Like breaking your actual bones in your actual shoulder is no big deal. It was surprising how calm he was being about the whole thing - you thought that if it were you you’d definitely have cried at least twice by now. Maybe that was why you kept asking him if he was okay, or if he wanted anything, because you knew you would definitely not be okay. He insisted he was fine though, so all you could do was wait for the results of his x-ray to come back (you did kinda wish he would say he wanted a snack because you could do with one yourself, but you weren’t going to say that, so you kept quiet).

Eventually a doctor did come around, accompanied by Mike, the nurse who assessed Tom earlier, who was carrying a tray with various rolls of tape and bandages on .

“Good news,” the doctor began once she’d introduced herself. “There’s no break.”

Oh thank God.

“...you’ve got what’s known as an AC joint separation, or a separated shoulder.”

“Right. So is it like, dislocated?” Tom asked, looking between the doctor and Mike, who was setting the tray down on the side and putting on a pair of gloves.

“Not quite - so with a dislocation the bone pops out of the socket, whereas what you’ve done is you’ve basically damaged the ligaments that hold up the socket - the ones connecting your collarbone to your shoulder blade. Does that make sense?”

“Mmhmm,” Tom nodded, “I think so.”

“So,” the doctor continued, “because the bits holding your collarbone to your shoulder were essentially torn by the force of your fall, your collarbone can move up on its own - that’s what this bump here is.” She pointed to the lump on the point of Tom’s shoulder with her pen. “And obviously that means it’s not doing its job of supporting your arm, which is why you’re having to hold it like that.”

You just stood there, listening as she explained to Tom what the problem was and how they were going to fix it. She was doing a good job of explaining everything, which was nice - sometimes after seeing a doctor you left feeling more confused about what was wrong with you than when you went in. She explained how Mike was going to tape up Tom’s shoulder to support the joint, and that he’d have to wear a sling to support the weight of his arm, and that they would refer him for physio and give him painkillers and so on and so forth, but it wasn’t so severe that he’d need surgery, and he should heal up fine.

“...okay, thanks. How long- how long will it take - to heal?” he asked as the doctor went to leave.

“Depends, four to six weeks maybe?”

Ah.

Tom just nodded and thanked her again, and after that he said little else. He did what Mike told him to so that he could get him strapped up, but you could tell that he really just wanted to go home now. You were relieved to hear he had no broken bones, and that he wasn’t going to need surgery or anything, but hearing that it was going to take over a month to heal was evidently not what he wanted to hear.

The nurse gave him some more advice as he taped up his shoulder - that he’d need to go to see his GP and get it retaped in a few days, keep icing it etcetera etcetera - but you were the one who responded. By the time he left, saying someone would be back with a prescription for painkillers and then Tom could go home - you were running out of ways to say ‘okay, thanks, will do’.

“At least you can use your right hand now?” you said hopefully once Mike had left.

“Yeah, I guess,” Tom sighed, looking down at his sling-bound arm. It didn’t seem to bring him much comfort.

“...you gonna call your mum?”

He sighed again, then picked up his phone from the bed beside him. “Yeah.”

You gave him a sympathetic smile as he lifted the phone to his ear, clicking his tongue impatiently as he waited for his mum to answer.

“Hi mum. Yeah, I’m okay - how was the match? Um, well-”

⋘ SIXTEEN | EIGHTEEN ⋙

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#tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfic #tom holland imagine #tom holland blurb #tom holland headcanon #tom holland smut #tom holland fluff

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dreaming-of-assclass · 4 years

Text

Hi!! @urcracksisx !! Thank you for asking! I love them so much 😭 Btw this is the blog where I make headcanons haha! I only really reblog AssClass stuff on my main, I’ve moved all content-making to be on this blog instead!

Ok so...these two both gain feelings for each other around the same time.

I imagine it to be shortly after the Okinawa trip! When both of them have “redeemed” themselves to the class.

And at this time, they’re steadily gaining a better understanding of each other, spending more time and interacting positively as classmates

In my interpretation of them, it’s not overdramatic, romantic stuff that makes up their connection. But rather instead, more soft mundane moments that really show their true feelings.

Things like Terasaka tossing his sweater over Karma as he sleeps, to keep him warm.

Karma sneakily giving him answers to things at time, under the guise of arrogance, but no, he really does just wanna help.

More often than not, one of them is napping outside on the mountain or roof while skipping class...and the other obnoxiously wakes them up and demands to hang out. So now they’re both skipping class to be on a “date”

Neither of them are dense. They know when they’re starting to fall for each other, when the little moments, glances, laughter, light insults...it all starts to feel different.

So the problem isn’t that they’re unaware...it’s that both of them are unwilling. Karma doesn’t wanna fall into this feeling of vulnerability that comes with relationships. Terasaka is in denial; how could he fall for Karma Akabane, for all people? A small part of him is insecure about his intelligence in comparison to Karma’s

“I can’t fall in love with him...I can’t trust him.” “Why would he fall for me...?”

Basically thoughts like that

Eventually it all accumulates over time, the rising tension that’s present constantly, the awareness of their classmates and friends, family...

During Christmas break, when Karma secluded himself from the class in deep contemplation of what to do about Koro...Terasaka shows up at his house with a gift

Karma is confused but reluctantly accepts it after Terasaka tells him to just open it. Inside of the box is a scarf and really nice watch.

Karma is stunned and doesn’t say anything. Terasaka turns red, regretting it all. He looks away. “Yeah I know your rich ass could afford better stuff anyways...feel free to return it, man-”

And then Karma just cuts him off with a “Shut up idiot.” And he grabs him and kisses him.

All around them, snow is falling and it just looks magical ahhhhhh

When they pull away, Karma says “I love it.” And Terasaka’s face turns even redder hahaha.

And then they go inside and drink got chocolate, Terasaka still processing. He’s like “Are we boyfriends now? Am I bi or gay? Are you gay?”

Karma, rolling his eyes: “Will you just drink your goddamn hot cocoa?”

And then Terasaka just blurts out. “It’s fine if we are! I mean...yeah I wanna date you, asshole. Do you feel the same?” You know, boi be honest like that.

And now Karma turns red hahaha, and clears his throat. “Ah, yeah, me too.”

And when they return back to school, there’s a somber mood and atmosphere all around bc of the situation with Koro. But no one notices the small smiles these two give to each other when they take their seats.

Even if the world is ending, at least they have each other...

I’m soft now 🥺 I love them so much

#assclass #karma akabane #ryoma terasaka #karmasaka #headcanons

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babybuckleydiaz · 4 years

Note

Can you write something where Buck deals with all the trauma that came from the thoughtst of losing his family. Like he thought he lost Chris in the tsunami, then he thought he is gonna lose Bobby bc he is gonna get ill, then Maddie when the dispatch center was taken,and finally he thought he was gonna lose Eddie too. And it was just all too much and he started falling apart but firefam notices and helps him through

Warnings: swearing, insomnia, mentions of the therapist from season one, nightmares, spoilers. established buddie, hurt comfort.

Okay, so it’s currently 4am and I’ve finally finished this after so long. It’s a long one, my guys. Its about 6k words long. And I’m not happy with some of it, but I haven’t posted a prompt fill in ages so I really wanted to get this out. I really did enjoy writing it though, in more of a 5 +1 style. So, thank you so much for the prompts and I am so sorry if it’s not at all what you wanted, but I really hope that you like it. Thank you so much for reading, guys

also on ao3, since this is a long fic

BOBBY

“Hey, kid. Go get some rest.” When the order comes, Bobby voice is nothing but gentle and concerned with a hand resting on Buck’s shoulder, eyes searching the younger’s man face with something akin to worry. The team wasn’t even half way through a twenty four hour shift, and today has been nothing but exhausting call after exhausting call; it was obvious to even the untrained eye that the younger firefighter was overflowing with a bone deep tiredness. And for a moment, Bobby thinks that Buck is going to agree with him and do as is asked; but all he receives is a small shake of the head.

“Nah, Cap. I’m not tired.” The excuse is weak to even Buck’s ears, and it’s obvious by the raised eyebrow that he gets that Bobby doesn’t believe a word that he is saying; the worry growing tenfold. The circles under Buck’s eyes are dark and deep, movements still as his limbs screamed for a moment of anything similar to rest; mind already having gone into overdrive. “I slept earlier.” Bobby isn’t stupid, he’s far from it, and he’s able to see exactly what the younger man is doing. Buck knows that Bobby is able to read him easily, can see when he’s lying but he’s giving his Captain a chance to just forget about this conversation and sweep it under the rug. No way in hell was Bobby going to do that though, not when it would put lives, including Buck’s own, in risk by allowing an exhausted firefighter on the front line.

“We both know that’s bullshit, son.” Bluntly expressed Bobby, and he sees how Buck’s shoulder’s sag and his entire body seems to deflate at the breath of laughter that escapes his lips. “Talk to me, Buck. What’s going on?” Buck looks up from where he had shifted his attention to the ground, and he’s searching Bobby face for any sign that he doesn’t mean to concern that is obvious in his voice when he speaks. But he finds nothing but worry on the face of his Captain, but he shakes his head as he paints a sad and small smile across his face.

“Its fine, Bobby. I’m fine, don’t worry about me.”

Bobby wasn’t going to let it go because he could see as clear as day that whatever was going on in Buck’s head was affecting him, and as someone who loves the kid like family he can’t allow him to continue like this. “It’s a bit late for that, kiddo. You’re family and I’m always going to worry.” Explained Bobby in a tone that he didn’t regret letting this firehouse become a home, that he loved being able to come into work and being around people he loved and he knew loved him. And he worried about each and every one of them; nothing would or could ever change that. It was his job, as a Captain and as a friend to each of them.

“It’s stupid; I’m gonna go take that nap.” But Bobby could see straight through the lie that Buck had just told, that the younger man wouldn’t sleep and would instead be staring at the ceiling until the alarm blared through the firehouse. “Buck…” Bobby didn’t want to drop the conversation when something was obviously wrong, but he knew that if he kept pushing that Buck could completely close off; and that was something that he didn’t want to happen. “Look, Bobby.” Began the younger man, an understanding yet strained smile on his face, and Bobby misses the ones where Buck smiles as brightly as the sun.

“I know you’re concern, and I appreciate it, but I’m okay. I’m dealing with it.”

Bobby had no idea what ‘it’ would even begin to be, but whatever it was, it was clear to see that Buck wasn’t dealing with it at all; at least not in a way that could be considered healthy. Bobby was certain that even a blind man would be able to see that Buck was struggling with whatever was going on in that head of his. And the older man won’t lie, it’s killing him to know that Buck feels as though this is something he can’t get help for, that he feels like he has to bury and pretend that it isn’t there. “You’re not dealing with anything, son.”

Buck freezes as he sighs, because Bobby’s tone isn’t even remotely judgemental or annoyed at the brick wall he’s seemed to hit in this conversation; instead it filled with an understanding and worry for the younger man. There’s nothing but silence between the two men for a moment, Bobby praying to anyone who would listen that the man in front of him would reach out for the help that he so obviously needed but wasn’t going to seek out on his own. “I’ll be fine, Cap.” And when Buck had spoken his tone was tired, sounded far too wrecked for someone of his age but Bobby can’t blame him, because Buck has seen far too much and been through more in his short life.

“Just…” Bobby begins, pausing and allowing his voice to trail off for a moment as he thinks about what to say, what could he possibly say anyway to help the man he loved as his own son? “Just try and get some sleep, please?” It what he settles on, because there isn’t much he can do when Buck won’t open up to him, but the most he can do is allow the kid to know that he cares and he’s in his corner should the younger man need him. And Buck can understand what he means through the words, Bobby can tell. Because the smile that Buck sends him may be small and tired, but it’s real and shows his appreciation for what his Captain was trying to achieve here.

“Sure thing, boss.”

Watching him go, Bobby doesn’t even bothering admitting to the younger man that he can tell Buck wasn’t going to even begin to try and allow his mind the peacefulness of rest; he remains silent. “Damn it, kid.” Bobby curses silently, wishing that there had been something more he could have done or said that would have allowed the kid to feel as though he could share whatever was troubling him.

Because whatever that was bothering the firefighter was drowning him, and it’s was clear to the captain that Buck was struggling to stay afloat of his own thoughts; they we’re ruining him. Briefly, Bobby finds himself wondering if Athena would have had any more luck had she been in this conversation, if anyone else would have gotten the other man to open up and share what was holding him down.

HEN

“Come on, man. Talk to me.” There’s a pleading done in Hen’s voice when she speaks, taking the time to wait for a moment where it could just be her and Buck alone. They’re currently in front of their fire truck, restocking the medical supply when Hen decides that she’s finally try and get to the bottom of whatever was weighing the younger man down. In response to what had been said, Buck just sighs as he stops whatever he is doing, placing the bandages that he had in his hand onto the truck; barely looking at Hen when he faces her.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Hen.” That’s a lie, and Hen knows that Buck is aware that she isn’t dumb nor would she fall for what he had said to her. “I’m perfectly fine.” He added on, seeing her disbelieving look when he finally raises his head to meet her eyes, giving her a smile that would convince anyone who didn’t know him as well as she did. Buck is her best friend, someone that means the world to her and she was able to read the younger man like an open book without ever really trying. “I’m not blind, Buck. I know you, and I can see something is killing you, man.” She explained in a tone softer that what she would usually use, but this is serious and Hen wants Buck to know that he can talk to her about anything plaguing his troubled mind.

“Hen, I’m fine. I don’t need to make everything about me.”

That silences Hen for a moment as she frowns deeply at the other man standing in front of her, because there was more meaning behind his words that what Buck was even aware of. And all Hen can think about is the number of times people have accused Buck of making everything about himself; and how fucking wrong they were to event think that.

But Buck is allowed to be selfish, to do things simply because he wants them for himself. There is nothing wrong with that and it’s so perfectly human of him to do for once. She inwardly winces; because the last time Buck had done something to benefit him had been when he filed the lawsuit; something she strongly sided with him about. He was being kept from his job and he had every single right to fight like damn hell to get back to it. “It’s not selfish to unburden yourself by talking to a friend.” Responds Hen, not really knowing what else she could have said to try and get her point across.

“Look Buck, I love you.” She adds on, stepping forward and reaching out to take one of Buck’s hands tightly within her own, not mentioning that she can feel them tremble in her grip. “And I know that something is going on, okay? And I want to help you because you’re my family.” Buck is looking at her now, the faintest trace of a frown on his brows as he bites into his lower lip in thought. “I want to help you because I love you so much.” She concluded gently, an encouraging smile gracing her face as she pulls her friend into a hug.

She can feel how Buck seems to melt into her touch, body completely sagging as he wraps arms around her in response to the action.

“I-I’m fine.” And this time when he says it, Hen can see that he is talking to himself instead of her; forcing himself to believe it the more that he said it. “You’re not, and you’re allowed to not be okay.” Whispered Hen, something that only Buck could hear because it was meant for his ears only. “And it’s okay to ask for help, to reach out to someone else.” Buck nods against her shoulder, sighing as he pulls away from the safety of his friend’s arms and gives Hen the tiniest and saddest smile she has ever seen on his face.

“It’s just… I-“ Shaking his head and laughing something humourless, reaching up to rub angrily at his eyes when he felt tears burn in them, he stops himself speaking.

“I’m scared.” Buck’s voice sounds so broken at his own admission, choked up and small. Hen looks at him then, really looks at him and sees the tears in his eyes and the trembling of his hands. “Scared? Of what, Buckaroo?” She pries patiently, her words free of judgement and waiting for Buck to gather his own thoughts. But Buck stays silent for a while, for a long moment that Hen thinks he’s going to clam up and brush off his own declining mental health like he’s being doing for so long now. But still, Hen waits.

Buck Hen never gets to hear what Buck as going to say when he opens his mouth to speak, because it’s in that moment that the alarms decide to sound, jolting the both of them out of their moment. “Forget it, I’m fine.” Buck quickly brushes off, closing up the truck against and making his way towards his turnout uniform with hurried steps, and Hen can’t help but curse every God in existence for that. She knows that had been the only chance she had for Buck to talk to her, and that moment had been taken away before she could get any answers.

“Fuck!” She hisses angrily, the annoyance on her face as she runs up to get prepared as well while thinking about what Buck was going to admit; what would he be scared of?

CHIMNEY

“Hey, did you get any sleep?” The concern is clear in Chimney’s voice when he sits up in his bunk, eyes having gone straight to Buck’s and seeing the man in the same position as hours ago. On his back, arms behind his head and eyes staring at the ceiling but unseeing; the clear need for sleep written all over his face despite it all. And it worries him, because it’s clear that the man he loves like a little brother is struggling and suffering; and despite his nature of jest and laughter, Chimney found himself so concerned.

At the sound of the sudden whisper, being mindful of the still sleeping Hen and Eddie, Buck shifts his eyes to find Chimney looking at him with a deep frown. Shrugging his shoulders, Buck pushes himself into a sitting position, running a hand down his face and through his hair. “I don’t know, I don’t think so.” Frowning deeply at what had been his answer, Chimney moves to sit on the vacant space on Buck’s bunk; wanting to talk about this while he had the chance. “Hey, what’s going on? What do you mean, you don’t know?” Chimney presses, unsure if he’s asking as a friend or as a paramedic concerned about someone’s health. He doesn’t know, maybe it could be both.

“I dozed off, I think. But I just… can’t sleep.” There’s more to it than that, Chimney is well aware. But for now, he’s going to work with the information that Buck is giving him and dig a little deeper to try and find some more. “Come on, kid. Talk to dear old big brother Chimney.” The older man smiled, and he feels some little sentiment of relief when Buck snorts at his joke and rolls his eyes with something akin to a happy expression. “Oh shut up, man.” Responds the younger, leaning over and shoving his friend on the shoulder that Chimney barely reacts to, because now that he’s looking at his friend he sees the thinks that Hen had been talking about.

Buck looks absolutely exhausted, skin paler than normal with permanently tired eyes and dark circles to match.

“Jeez, buckaroo. When what the last time you actually slept?” And just like that, Buck’s smile drops from his face and instead is replaced with a deep straight line; the younger man sighing as he shakes his head. “Honestly? I have no fucking clue.” Buck’s honest, it’s clear that he’s tired of struggling with whatever is going on in that big old head of his. “I… I’ve tried! But I can’t sleep because every single night is filled with fucking nightmares, Chim.” Chimney nods his head to show that he is listening, wants Buck to see that he can talk and someone will take in what he is saying.

“What about? It might help to talk about them.” He offers, being the ear for Buck to rant in if that’s what he needs to feel better. Buck smiles softly as he leans back against the wall, letting his head fall back against it as he takes a deep breath. “Losing everyone.”

That throws Chimney into complete silence, and he isn’t ashamed to admit that the tone in Buck’s voice breaks his heart right in two. Because he sounds so lost and so small, and in that moment all Chimney wants to do is wrap him up and make sure that nothing can ever hurt him. “Sometimes, it’s Bobby being sick. Or you’re stabbing. Or the rebar incident.” Whispers Buck, not looking at Chimney when he speaks now, head tipped back against the wall and eyes shut when he speaks. “Or… Or it’s Eddie stuck under the ground, a-and I can’t save him.” When Buck mentions Eddie, Chimney doesn’t seem fazed or even mention how Buck’s voice cracks.

He watches as Buck instead turns his head to look at his boyfriend asleep on the other bunk, and it’s obvious that he’s taking in the fact that Eddie is still breathing and beside him. “Chris gets taken away from me in those, and… and I can’t lose you guys.” Buck pauses as he looks back at his friend. “Or when Doug took Maddie, that fear that she’s going to die is constantly replaying in my head.”

Chimney now finally understands what has been troubling his friend, that he’s being drowned by the memories of almost losing those that he loved. Briefly, Chimney wonders if that is something that should have been obvious to the team from the start. Chimney is quiet for a moment as he leans forward, placing a hand on Buck’s knee and looking his friend in the eyes with an encouraging smile. “Hey, you’re not going to lose any of us. You’re not going to be alone.” The tone that Chimney uses is confident when he speaks, because he knows that everyone here would never leave each other if they could help it.

“You can’t promise that, though!” Harshly whispered Buck and Chimney can see that it isn’t anger that he’s speaking with, it’s fear and desperation that causes his eyes to fill with tears. And Chimney remains silent as he thinks about what to say to Buck’s outburst, because he can’t promise that with the job that they have and the dangers that come hand in hand with it.

“Look, it’s fine. Forget I said anything.” Buck quickly brushes off when Chimney remains silent, knowing that the older man doesn’t know what he can say right now. Pushing himself up, Buck gets up from the bunk with the intention to do something else to distract his own mind. “Buck, wait. Talk to me, man. You can’t keep burying this hoping it will go away.” Chimney pleads, not wanting Buck to bury an issue like this and pretends that something is eating him alive; his friend is in mental pain and he doesn’t know what he can do to help right now. “Chim, don’t. I’m fine, I’m always fucking fine.” Once again, Chimney can’t sense nor hear any anger when he speaks despite sounding like it’s there, and that is enough to make his heart clench to painfully in his chest.

He can only sit there, watching Buck walk away from him with a sad and worried expression.

MADDIE

“Oh Ev…” Maddie voice is so quiet when he walks into her living room, finding her little brother asleep on the couch, wrapped so tightly under blankets she gave him. She notes that he doesn’t look peaceful either, his face scrunched up as he pants out roughly, hands tightly gripping the blanket as he makes a something akin to a whimper of fear. Quickly, she moves over and kneels beside the couch as he places a hand on her little brother’s shoulder, waking him up from whatever nightmare he finds himself trapped in.

“Hey, Buck. You gotta wake up, buddy.” She instructs softly, shaking the younger man’s shoulders with a frown of her own; hearing Buck mumble something out but not being able to understand what he’s saying. He sounds scared though, so scared that it breaks Maddie’s chest to hear such a tone come from someone who everyone sees as so strong. And he is, oh god is he so strong and brave, but he’s also human. “Come on, you’re okay. You gotta wake up, Buck.” She insists, shaking Buck’s shoulder just that little bit harder when he doesn’t respond to anything that she tells him. Maddie doesn’t want to scare him into waking up, not when he was already trapped in a nightmare that seemed to be doing that just fine on its own.

With a gasp, Maddie watches as Buck bolts up right with drastic breaths and eyes wildly looking around his surroundings. “Hey, hey, hey. You’re okay, you’re with me. You’re okay.” She sooths, moving forward and cupping either side of Buck’s face with hands so gentle, Buck’s eyes snapping to his sister’s face. “I though… I-“ Maddie is never going to hear whatever Buck was going to say, but he cuts himself off with the shake of his head as he puts a hand against his chest, taking deep and calming breaths to sooth his racing heart.

“Sorry, I’m good.” Buck quickly brushes off, sending his sister a shaky smile as he moves away from her touch and swings his legs over the edge of the couch, laughing at himself pathetically. Maddie shakes her head, having no idea why her little brother would apologize for having a nightmare; that’s not something that he needs to be sorry about. “Hey, don’t apologise, Buck. Are you okay, that seemed pretty bad?” Notes Maddie, brows pinches together as she pushes herself up from the ground and takes a seat beside her brother.

“Hey, I didn’t wake up screaming, so that’s pretty tame.” Buck says it as a joke to lighten the mood, but instead Maddie just cocks her head when he looks at him for a moment. “Wake up screaming?” She questions, and Buck can’t help but groan for making her more worried than what she already was. “Does that happen often, Buck?” Shaking his head, Buck pushes himself up from the couch and makes his way into the kitchen to get a glass of water, already prepared for Maddie to follow him with questions and concerns she won’t let go of. “Evan, talk to me.” Maddie begs when she does, in fact, follow her brother into the kitchen; not wanting to let this conversation die just yet.

“Mads, I’m fine. Just drop it, please.” Buck’s voice is pleading, begging, for her to just drop the subject but he’s known Maddie his whole life and knows how stubborn she can be. He inwardly snorts, that’s the one trait that she ever got from their father. “No, I’m not gonna drop it, Evan. I’ve watched for weeks as something has bothered you, I can’t keep letting you pretend that nothing is wrong.” She shoots back, and Buck sighs as he places the glass back onto the bench and leans forward, taking a moment to just breath. “I’m here, okay? And I’m not leaving, Evan. So talk to me.”

“But you’re not always gonna be here, Maddie!” Buck isn’t entirely sure what he means when he yells those words, turning around to face Maddie who looks shocked and taken aback. “I-I’m not leaving, Evan. I’m not leaving you again.” She promises, and Buck just shakes his head quickly as he reaches up to run a hand through his hair, scratching at the back of his head for a moment. “You can’t promise that, though! You can’t promise that you’re always gonna be here!” Maddie is silent for a moment, knowing that Buck is talking about when they were growing up and left for college, or when she left after meeting Doug; there’s more to what he’s saying.

“So what is the point of any of you saying that you’ll always be here when the reality is you can’t promise that?” Maddie can see the tears trailing down her brother’s face, that he angrily scrubs away with a scoff. “I am so sick of fucking crying!” He hisses to himself, beyond worked up and stressed about whatever has been bothering him for the last few weeks.

“And I am sick of not sleeping because every time I close my eyes, I’m losing you or someone from the team. Or Eddie and Chris. I am so fucking sick that I can’t just ‘get over it’” When Buck utters those last three words, Maddie notes the use of quotation marks with a frown; it’s obvious that they have another meaning to Buck when he says them. “Evan, how long has this been going on?” Maddie questions, tears burning in her own eyes at the thought of her brother suffering so terribly alone. “Why haven’t you told anyone?” Maddie jumps onto the next question when Buck just shrugs when his arms crossed over his chest, leaning back against the kitchen sink.

“Because, Maddie, I’m getting over it my own way, I’m fine.” He says once again, wondering how many times he’s said that in the past few weeks; and he’s wondering why he can’t force himself to believe it yet.

“You’re not dealing with it, though. And you don’t need to deal with it on your own.” Maddie’s voice is soft when she speaks again, and Buck doesn’t even respond to what he had said. “You’re hoping that if you keep saying you’re okay then it’ll come true.”

“Look I gotta go.” That is how that Maddie knows she’s hit the nail on the head, because Buck just does what he can to get out of the conversation; running away from his own problems so they won’t hurt him. And it causes her to sigh, because when Buck doesn’t think she’s knows she’s hit a dead end and Buck isn’t going to open up any more; despite how much she wishes that he would. “Just…” Maddie allows herself to pauses, because no matter what she says next Buck isn’t going to admit anything else, he’s done with this conversation. “Just drive safely, and text me when you get home.”

Buck nods his head as he grabs his jacket from where it was sitting on the kitchen island and his shoes before he allows Maddie to pull him into a tight hug, allowing her to hold him for a few moments longer than normal. “I love you, Evan.” She says gently in his ear, pulling away and taking a moment to place a hand on the side of his face; smiling so sadly up at her brother. “Love you, too.” Buck says back, and then Maddie can only watch as her brother walks out the door; a frown on her face the entire time that she watches him go.

EDDIE

Riddled with sleep, Eddie reaches out to pull Buck’s body closer to his own only for his hands to be met with the cold sheet on the mattress, lacking a certain someone. Opening his eyes tiredly, Edie looks over to see that Buck’s side of the bed is empty and has been for a while, causing the older male to frown in confusion. Groaning as he rolled over, and he looks at the clock that reads three in the morning, far too early for anyone to be up yet. Sighing, Eddie pushes himself up from the bed and begins his trek down the hall, searching for his boyfriend.

The first place that Eddie thinks to check is the living room, having found Buck there a handful of times in the past when the younger male wasn’t able to sleep; watching whatever was on to distract himself. But when he reaches the room, he’s greeted with the darkness and quietness that shows it’s empty, not even able to make out Buck asleep on the couch. It’s obvious he’s in here and for a moment Eddie frowns, he had really expected his boyfriend to be in here watching television. Biting into his lip, Eddie makes his way into the kitchen in hopes that his boyfriend would be in there, only to be once again proven wrong by no sign of Buck.

For a moment, Eddie stands in the dark kitchen confused because he doesn’t have that many options left as to where Buck could be; and he can’t help but be worried.

The firefighter is about to make his way back into the bedroom so he could retrieve his phone and call his boyfriend, only for something to catch his eyes when he begins to walk. He looks over to the direction of the front door and sees it slightly open, the outdoor light flicked on, and he makes his way towards the direction with a frown.

Opening the door, he sees that Buck is sitting on the steps with a jacket wrapped tightly around his body, hands wrapped around a mug of coffee as he takes calming deep breaths. “Buck? What are you doing out here, baby?” He questions as he moves to sit down on the steps beside his boyfriend and wraps arm around the younger man’s shoulder to bring him closer to his chest. Buck doesn’t hesitate to lean his head on Eddie’s shoulder and close his eyes, soaking in the comforting that his partner brings him.

“Woke up an hour ago, couldn’t get back to sleep.” Simply explains Buck, and Eddie can hear the tiredness that drags down Buck’s voice, can hear the roughness in it. “Nightmare?” The older man questions with a light tone, soaking in the cool night air as he holds his loved one close to his body; everything around them is calm and quiet.

“Mhm.” Is the only confirmation that Buck gives Eddie, the way his response sounded was clear that he didn’t want to talk about his nightmare, and Eddie wasn’t going to pressure him into talking if he didn’t wish to. So he allows them to just sit there in silence, knowing that if Buck wants to talk about his nightmare than his boyfriend was here to listen to him. But Eddie was going to allow his partner to deal with this at his own pace right now, the most he can do and is just be by his side to comfort him.

“Come on, sweetheart. Let’s head back to bed.” Eddie voices up a few minutes later, looking down and pressing a soft kiss to Buck’s head and waiting for his boyfriend to nod in response. “Okay.” Is the worded answer he gets, but neither of them move for a short moment. Finally, Eddie is the first to move and pulls Buck to his feet by his hands. Eddie smiles when he pulls Buck’s body against his own, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend’s lips when the younger man wraps one arm around his neck and the other gripping the front of his shirt.

Eventually the two make their way into the house, Eddie keeping Buck’s hand tightly within his own as he takes a second to close and lock the front door before they make their way down into the bedroom. On the way, Eddie looks back when he feels how Buck pauses in front of Christopher’s door, biting into his lower lip before sighing and shaking his head to himself. He’s about to walk forward toward their bedroom when Eddie stops him, sending his boyfriend a knowing look as stopping him from walking away. “You wanna check on Chris?” Buck only hesitates for a moment, biting into his lower lip before he nods his head and smiles at his boyfriend gratefully.

Eddie had guessed when Buck had stopped in front of Christopher’s door that his boyfriend must have had a nightmare about the Tsunami, and he knew that checking on the young boy would help Buck a lot. Eddie can’t even count the number of times he’s found Buck in Christopher’s room, just making sure that the kid was really here after having a nightmare about the Tsunami; it would always help to just make sure that Christopher really was here and safe. “Alright, we can do that.” Eddie says, quietly opening the door and allowing Buck to poke his head into the room.

The reaction is instant, Eddie watches as Buck’s body seems to melt as the stress and worry leaves his body at the sight of Christopher sleeping soundly, and safe, in his bed. “Come on, you need to get some sleep, love.” Eddie’s voice is filled with nothing but love and patient as he directs the younger man out of the room, Buck following his boyfriend after him without a word.

Eddie lays down first, allowing Buck to take his time as he crawls into the bed; taking his place curled up against the short of the two men. Eddie lets Buck rest his head against his chest, using the hand of the arm holding Buck to run fingers through his hair, his other hand rubbing up and down Buck’s arm.

“I’m sick of not being able to sleep, Eds.” Buck suddenly speaks up, and all Eddie can do is holding him just that little bit tighter and closer. “I know, love. I know.” Whispers the older man, because this was a conversation that needed to be have tomorrow, when both of them were more aware and awake. “For now, just close your eyes and listen to my breathing, okay?” Eddie instructs, feeling the younger man nod his head against his chest when the other man moved to lie on his back. “Match my breathing, close your eyes and take some deep breaths.” Eddie’s voice is extremely soothing, and Buck allows himself to close his eyes as he does as is asked of him; taking deep breaths that matches Eddie’s own.

It takes a while for Buck to be soothed off to sleep, but Eddie doesn’t fall asleep until he feels Buck’s breathing even out and his body sags against him.

While Eddie wishes that he could have spoken to Buck about everything that’s been going on but he knows that Buck needs all the sleep he can get. So for now, he forgets about everything that he wants to talk about and allows himself to follow his boyfriend to sleep.

EVERYONE

Athena had been expecting something like this to happen sooner or later, because every time that she saw Buck she could see that the young man was one step closer to just breaking down. And even though the woman had expected it to happen, it doesn’t mean that it didn’t break her heart when she watches Buck sob onto the decking of her backyard.

The day had started off so nicely, the team being invited over to the Nash-Grant household for a bi-weekly dinner; and everything had been wonderful. And Athena can’t be sure what had started it, or why it was even a conversation. But they were talking about their near death experiences, the entire time Buck had been silent and seemed to have zoned out while everyone jokes and laughed about it. That had been followed by Buck excusing himself as tears slid down his cheeks, only making it to the decking before he had burst into a fit of sobs.

Everyone seemed to freeze in shock and surprise while Bobby and Eddie moved quickly, the duo running to either side of Buck’s side when the younger man collapsed to his knees as he sobbed. “Hey, shh, shh. Just breath, love. You’re okay.” Eddie whispers, allowing the firefighter to fall against his chest as he wrapped his arms tightly around his boyfriend. “I-I can’t lose you guys! I can’t!” Hen moved forward as Buck spoke, eyes filled with compassion and sadness as she sat in front of the fallen man, taking one of his hands tightly into his own, not saying anything but allowing the man to know that she was here for him.

“We’re all right here, Buckaroo.” Chimney explained as he also moved closer, sitting between Hen and Bobby and placing a hand on Buck’s shoulder, whose crying hasn’t eased up. “We’re here, buddy. We’re still here, we’re with you.” Chimney says again, thinking back to the conversation that he had with Buck and everything the younger man had admitted, his heart breaking when he thinks about how long this has been weighing Buck down.

“We can’t promise to always be safe, not with our job.” Bobby begins, and places a hand on the back of Buck’s head that coax’s the younger male to look to him with red rimmed eyes. “But we can promise that we’ll always fight to back to this family, come back to you, kiddo.” Smiles Bobby so lovingly, and Buck sniffs as he takes Bobby’s hand that was on his head into his own hand, not moving from where he was leaning against Eddie. Maddie walks over now, tears sliding down her face as she sits behind her brother and presses a kiss to the back of his head.

“You’re not alone, Evan. Not anymore, you’re here with family.” She whispers, Buck’s crying still having not eased up despite him nodding his head at the words she had uttered. “I-I know, it’s just… You guys are all I have, I can’t lose you.” Buck finally admits everything; explain what had been weighing him down. “And every time I close my eyes, all I can think about is how close I’ve come to losing each of you. It fucking terrifies me.” He sobbed, Eddie holding him closer and rubbing a soothing hand across his back and he pressed a kiss to the top of his boyfriend’s head.

“Kiddo, how would you feel about going back to therapy? Meeting with someone else?” Bobby questioned, asking that last bit after seeing that small bit of panic in the younger man’s eyes when he looked up at him. “We can chose the therapist together, but I think seeing someone about this would really benefit you, son.” The Captain’s voice is filled with understanding when he speaks, and his eyes hold nothing but concern and love for the man sitting in front of him.

“I might know just the person for you, Buckaroo. They’re wonderful and might be the best fit for you.” Athena said suddenly, walking over and standing behind her husband; smiling down so encouragingly when Buck looks up at her. After a moment of silence, and briefly looking at his boyfriend who just smiles so softly and patiently, he nods his head as he looks back up at the older woman. “Y-Yeah, okay. Yeah.” He whispers, releasing a breath he didn’t realise he was holding as he allows his body to sag back against Eddie; drained and tired.

“But right now, you and Eddie are going to go into the spare bedroom, and you’re going to get some rest.” Athena says, everyone stepping back when Eddie helps Buck climb to his feet; holding him close still. He only lets go of the man that he loves when Athena steps forward and bring the younger man into her arms, holding him so tightly as if letting go would mean him disappearing. “You’re running on fumes, and you need rest. So go, we’ll wake you both up when dinner is ready.” Bobby added on, placing a hand on Buck’s shoulder when Athena pulls away from the hug.

“T-Thanks, guys. I’m sorry for how I’ve been acting.” He utters, feeling a little guilty about how worried all of them have been about his wellbeing lately, but it does make him feel so loved that they cared so much about him. “Hey, don’t apologise for this, okay? You’re allowed to have feelings, you’re human. And you’ve been through a lot.” Hen says seriously, smiling at her best friend as she pulls him into a hug of her own. “You’re feelings are completely valid, Buckaroo.”

Eddie, who had been watching with a smile, can easily see that Buck is feeling a little overwhelmed with everything that had happened so he excuses them and says that they’re going to go take up that offer to get some sleep; he can see Buck badly needs it. Leading a tired and sluggish Buck into the house, Eddie holds his hand so tightly as they make their way into the said spare bedroom.

“I would be so lost without you guys; I love you all so much.” Buck whispers despite only talking to Eddie now, who sits him down on the edge of the bed and begins kicking off his own shoes and jacket while Buck does the same. “And therapy might be the best idea; I’m just worried about it.” And Eddie understands why Buck is worried, and everything he is scared about is completely justified and valid; and Eddie isn’t ashamed to admit that he would be the same as Buck.

“I know, love. But if Athena trusts this person, then I’m assuming they’re a safe bet. What happened with her won’t happen again, sweetheart.” Eddie feels like he can promise this, especially if Athena had been the one who was going to give them the name of someone that she trusted; especially after the event with Buck’s previous therapist taking advantage of him. “And we’re here for you, because we love and support you.”

And for the first time in so long when Buck smiles up at his boyfriend it’s genuine and real, even though it’s something small and tired. But it’s real and that is enough to make Eddie feel as though everything is going to be okay soon. Not now, maybe not within the next year, but things will be okay.

#anonymous #prompt fill #buddie fic #evan buckley #eddie diaz #bobby nash #athena grant #hen wilson #howie han #maddie buckley #buck x eddie #i am so tired now #but i hope this is ok #hurt/comfort #angst with a happy ending

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taejeonie · 4 years

Text

i’ll be there to catch you fall

— when things get to rough for taehee, she can’t help but crumble down

they just got home from promotions and they were tired as hell

doyoung was in the living room watching tv

taeyong was in his room playing games

johnny’s in his room

hyuck’s in the dorm on the upper floor hanging out with mark and taeil

taehee decided to go down and stay in doyoung’s room bc she figured it would be more quiet in the downstairs dorm

she went through twitter and searched up her name

she was actually interested in what the fans had to say about her

the members told her that she’s one of the members that changed the most this cb so

she’s wondering if the fans thought the same

but then twitter at that time was

a meanie :((

so she saw the hate tweets

all of it

she saw some good ones but....

seeing the hate ate her mind like crazy

she knows what she’s getting herself into by debuting as the only girl in the group

and that getting hate is normal for idols

but she doesn’t get it now

they’re telling her to leave

to leave their boys alone

that she wasn’t needed in the group and nothing wouldn’t change if she left

she felt so hurt

she worked very hard for this cb, just as much as all the other cb’s they had before

she stayed up late at night trying to find out what could be missing in the song

or if she was doing a move right in their choreography

it wasn’t this bad during her debut

but now they started calling her names

names she tried to avoid

she knew she did well, she’s sure of it

the other members assured her too

but why would they say things like this

she’s a good person, isn’t she?

she didn’t do anything wrong

she sees some of her fans defend her

but then the anti’s just bully them and it hurts knowing that her fans are getting hurt bc of her

but #taeheeprotectionsquad is strong ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

she was thankful that they were defending her but she didn’t want them to get into fights

taehee was crying waterfalls by now

then she started thinking about how doyoung would have to change his pillows since she cried on them

so she cries more

and if her day couldn’t get any better

a s*esang messaged her

but it wasn’t her sae*ang

it was one of the boys’

they keep telling her to back off and kept calling her names

but they’re on the same team??? so how >:((

smh she gave her all into the team and people are acting like this

taehee felt like leaving the group countless of times before

but the support of her member’s kept her going

but now she doesn’t know what to do

she feels her breaths becoming shorter

and it gets harder to breathe

she feels like falling and her chest starts to hurt

she’s having a panic attack

it takes her a while to get herself together

and focus on calming her breaths

her mini-episode was over but the tears. won’t. stop. flowing.

so she lays there and continues to cry and let it out

just like taeyong told her to

she screamed into the pillow. hit the pillow. cried into the pillow. and screamed some more, her cries muffled out by doyoung’s pillow

she’s still crying but she’s calmer now

you gotta do what you gotta do to let it all out ://

“and after you calm yourself down, drink a glass of water. then go to your room and turn the ac on so you won’t feel too hot,” she remembers taeyong saying

so taehee gets up slowly

as she walked to the kitchen she feels her eyelids get hot and her legs wobble

but her throat is dry so she needs to take a drink

she decided that she would nap and hope everything will be better the next day

but then she remembers all the comments again and the tears flow harder

she was shaking so much she dropped the glass

her legs give out soon after

so when she feels the glass pierce her hand and leg, she let out a painful cry

the sound startled doyoung so he immediately runs to the kitchen

“taehee!”

when he gets there his heart breaks

taehee’s hair is messy and her eyes are so swollen

her cheeks are red from crying and she’s sitting on glass

:(((

so doyoung quickly rushes to her and pushes the glass away with his slipper

taehee couldn’t breathe again as she choked out sobs

“i’m sorry. i’m so sorry,” she said

doyoung thought she was referring to the glass falling so he was like “it’s fine, okay? it’s not your fault.”

and then he was telling her to breathe

she had episodes before, predebut

and he and taeyong would always be there to help her

they both didn’t notice taeyong and johnny were there until the former appeared in front of taehee

“taehee?,” taeyong called softly, “i want you to breathe, okay? count with me, ready?”

“one....”

“o-on,,,one....”

“two....”

“,,,,t,,two.....”

they counted all the way up to ten until taehee calmed down

“can you stand up?,” doyoung asked her and she nodded

“okay....i’m gonna clean your wounds up, okay?”

“okay,” she whimpered

so doyoung led taehee to his room and closed the door

meanwhile taeyong called the manager

and johnny cleaned up the glass

“it’s happening again, isn’t it?,” johnny asked him.

“yeah....but this time we have to get it out of her. if she doesn’t tell us what’s wrong then we can’t help her,” :(((

okay taeyong mom

back inside the room

doyoung’s wrapping bandages around her leg and arms

“do you....do you want to tell me what’s wrong?”

.....

“maybe....later,” taehee answers him

so he nods at that and rubs her arms comfortingly

“i’ll get you water. get some sleep,,,and tell taeyong, okay?”

he didn’t wait for her to answer and walked out the door

so taehee tried to sleep

but she couldn’t

she can’t help but think about what they said about her earlier

so for the whole two hours doyoung left her alone to sleep

she didn’t sleep

she felt like crying more

so she got up and left the dorm

taeyong and doyoung were talking in the living room and they saw taehee walk out their door

and they were unsure whether to follow her or not

bc it looked like she wanted to be alone

but then they wanted to help her :(((

so they settled with texting the other members upstairs if she got there

when taehee got back to the upstairs dorm

they were all in the living room taeil, jungwoo, hyuck, and mark

they stopped talking as soon as they heard someone enter the dorm

and they looked at taehee

and they got worried

when taehee entered her room, mark got a text from taeyong asking if she was there

he replied and asked what happened

so taeyong told him she had an episode downstairs and mark immediately felt bad

taeil and hyuck told him to go to her

so he did

and when he entered the room he heard her crying :(((

so he turned the ac on

put up some soft music in the bg

and he kneels down beside her bed and hugs her from behind

“do you want to talk about it?,” he asks quietly

“...maybe tomorrow,” so mark nods and rubs her arm until she falls asleep

the next day they had to perform kick it again

everyone knew by now what happened to taehee

so while the members were getting their makeup and outfits done

taehee was asleep on the couch since she didn’t get any proper sleep last night :((

when their performance aired

the fans noticed the bandages

and the times taehee was out of it

so it blew up on social media again

other were calling her lazy

others were calling her an attention seeker

and taehee was it again

so she was back to crying but this time it was in her room

mark laid down on his own bed listening to taehee

and whenever he felt like her breaths were getting shorter

he helped her calm down

and when it’s okay he comes back to his bed

the following day the manager told her to do a vlive and tell everyone your okay

“bc sm’s got a lot of problems right now and we don’t need you to add to them. so act like you’re fine so they could stop” - bad manager

so before she went on vlive she tried to sleep

but she couldn’t

taeyong texted mark he was coming over so he left to go to the living room

and they talked for a few hours when they thought she was sleeping

so taeyong quietly got in the room, thinking she was awake now

but he only saw more tear streaks on taehee’s face, telling him he didn’t sleep

so he goes to sit behind her and rest his head on the headboard

“whenever your ready,,,” he whispers

“we’re ready to help you, okay? you’re not....you’re not a burden”

so he waits

three minutes pass and taeyong thinks she’s fallen asleep

but slowly, she sits up and sits beside him

she fiddles with her fingers while taeyong brushes her hair out of her face

“they,,,,they want me to leave....”

“i mean they told me that during debut but i thought i was doing so well-“ she sniffs

“it’s getting harder,,,,to ignore all these things. the fans do so much for us but i guess i saw it at a bad time.”

taeyong knew what she was talking about

“oppa,” she said as she turned to him

“did you know.......did you know i wanted to quit before?”

taeyong was shocked

bc he didn’t know even if he was the leader

all of them didn’t know except the manager

but how? you looked fine back then

you were doing fine,,he knew that

“i saw that a lot of people said that you guys would be better off without a girl in your group,,”

“but then we went out to celebrate for ‘regular’ so i thought,,,it wouldn’t be so bad.”

“you guys are strong, you know? i want to be like you.”

“but then i’m acting like i’m the only one having problems when you guys should be resting”

it was silent for a moment before she laid her head down on taeyong’s shoulder

so he thought it was his time to speak

“you know as idols, we couldn’t avoid it right? sometimes they’re ridiculous, but there are times where it gets out of hand too,,,”

“it’s okay that you feel that way,,,,maybe this is your way to cope for all this....”

“you’re not a problem to us. we don’t regret debuting with you no matter what the others say. you work just as hard as all of us, please remember that....”

“the members and i will be here to support you always, okay? that’s what a family is. no matter what they say, you always have us. and that won’t change.”

“we love you, taehee. so much.”

taeyong gave her a proper hug from her side and rubbed her back comfortingly

“thank you,” he hears her whisper

and taeyong’s a but relieved bc she’s opening up more bit by bit

“do you still have to do that vlive?”

“yeah,,,,”

“okay, rest up then. mark will wake you up when it’s time.”

so he leaves after a few moments

and ever since yesterday, she was able to sleep well even just for a few hours

then mark woke her up so she’s like

fight mode: on

so she turns on the vlive

and she sees those people again

but this time she ignores them

and tried to focus on the good people :>>>

she talked with the czennies

telling her about her day

sharing her music recs

and movies she wanted to watch

until it got silent

since all the comments now were about protecting her from the hate

her manager was there in the room with her but she didn’t care

she wanted to say this first and get it off her chest

“you guys say i’m good....because you’re a czennie,,,,”

“everyone,,please don’t think like that. the way you see me,,,is different from how the world sees me.”

“and i’ve accepted that now.”

you smile at them before continuing to talk with those in the commments

ignoring the disappointed looks on your manager

but after the live

i guess u could say everything went back to normal

taehee was her happy self again

but she’s stronger now

she was greatful for opening up to taeyong

she’s learning to do that with the rest little by little

so the members are silently greatful for that

she learned that her members would always be there for her no matter what <3

ping!! text from

doyoungie <3: we’ll always be here for you. i love you

60 notes · View notes

hwangdol · 5 years

Text

l.jn: just shoot your shot

summary: can jeno just be confident in himself? pls? pretty pls?

pairing: student-athlete!jeno x tutor! (fem) reader

warning: PROCEED WITH CAUTION! GRAMMAR MISTAKES! AND CRACKHEADS! ALSO CURSING! i’m back and i’m not dead so here’s some athlete!jeno that everyone was looking forward too. just a reminder, this is apart of my collab with @huangsren so check out her art-hoe! renjun and childhood-friend! chenle in our dreamies highschool au. i’m not really satisfied with this piece compared to my other two. hopefully, this still slaps. also, there will be for sure a second part to this so yuh. enjoy.

okay so let’s get this straight lee jeno is THAT guy whose in like all of the sports teams on campus

basketball, baseball, football, soccer, track and field, cross country, pickleball, etc he’s on them all

he was deadass about to join the cheerleading team just so he could have the clout of being on all of the teams

ngl imagine a cheerleader!jeno,,,hell yeah that’s my shit

but he didn’t bc he isn’t as big of a crackhead as one like to think

jeno has the reputation of the silent cold guy, but in actuality is a big FLOOF ball especially with his close friends (aka jaemin)

he’s well-liked by everyone bc he’s hecka nice once they look pass that cold exterior and he’s realllly hot.

just picture sweaty!jeno after practice using his shirt to wipe off his sweat allowing everyone to have a glimpse of his abs.

sign me the fuck up

he’s just extremely shy and socially awkward so he doesn’t really know how to interact w people when he meets them for the first time so a lot of people just think he’s that distant, angsty type

it still shocks a shit ton of people when they find out he’s best friends with the social butterfly/ fboi! jaemin but don’t get him wrong bc he doesn’t go around town breaking hearts left and right like his best buddy does

as much as jeno likes to deny it, he is a ROMANTICIST

way back in freshmen year, jeno was captivated by a teenage romance which he blames ara (from fucq-boi! jaemin au) for roping him into all those barbies and chick-flick movies.

like his heart flutters at the idea of his significant other wearing his jersey to his games or sharing a milkshake at the local ice cream parlor,,,he wants to give them his hoodie and cuddle on the couch (hopefully watching barbie princess charm school)

BABY BOY JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED !

but he doesn’t want it to be superficial like what jaemin does

he highly disapproves of jaemin’s casanova ways

jaemin is probably really glad about the bros before hoes rule bc he would have lost jeno a long time ago with all of the girls he goes through

jeno knows that love is a delicate thing and should be treated seriously which is why he’s so against jaemin’s date and ditch

and jeno wants to be in a relationship! but he can’t bc he has like NO time for the lovey-dovey highschool bs (also bc he’s highkey scared that he might ruin any relationship he gets himself into)

the boy has back to back practice from all the sports he decided to take on

on multiple occasions, different practice times interfere with each other and instead of just missing one like he SHOULD, jeno decided to take em both on at the same time

catch him sprinting from the soccer field to the football field back and forth in between break times

one time, basketball and swimming practice collided w each other so jeno thought it was smart to go back and forth from the school’s pool to the gym after he’d finish a 1000M IM set and shot at least 15 3-pointers

let’s just say he flashed a lot of people, running half-naked with only his drag suit on when he forgot to put on his sweatpants in one of his runs back and forth

art-hoe! renjun never lets him live it down much to his embarrassment

“remember that one-time jeno displayed his junk to the whole student body? good times, good times”

cue jeno throwing a pencil at renjun or chasing him down the halls

jeno’s abs were the talk of the school for at least a whole month and our boi had red cheeks every time he heard someone talk about it

because of that jeno double-checks, quadruple-checks to make sure that his pants are on before booking it to the gym to shoot hoops

ALSO

another reason why a lot of people find jeno so intimidating and hard to approach was bc of the fight that happened between his ex-friend! stoner-boi!haechan sophomore year

no one expected that the calm, seemingly unbothered jeno could throw punches that hard. it was like he transformed into the hulk or something

except jeno didn’t like the new reputation he gained over a stupid fight with his once close friend.

there’s one nasty habit that jeno can’t seem to let go of no matter how much jaemin and renjun tell him to fix

the boy holds onto grudges like there’s no tomorrow

there was one time where jaemin had to borrow jeno’s phone for something and he accidentally dropped it

“hey can i borrow your phone to call someone? mine’s dead.” jaemin asked him.

“no, last time i gave it to you, you cracked it”

“dude! it was one time”

“say that to my cracked screen”

“for goodness sake, jeno, i only cracked your screen protector!”

“still you broke it”

yeah, jaemin never got to use jeno’s phone ever again.

someone didn’t give back the pencil he lent them? he doesn’t even look in their direction until jaemin nags him enough to just let it go

which is probably why he and haechan still vehemently hate each other even though renjun and jaemin are ready to go talk things out with haechan

some part deep down insides knows he should just let it go and actually talk things out with haechan on why he initiated the fight bc haechan was once someone jeno considered as a bro

and jeno doesn’t give out bro passes as easily

he just doesn’t know how to approach haechan or if haechan would even be willing to talk it through

it’s kinda sad how the two of them don’t even look each other in the eye or acknowledged each other existence anymore

other than that jeno is practically flawless, jk

as much as he is very enthusiastic in physical education, when it comes to math, science, etc, jeno is basically flunking. like borderline passing in all of his classes

he was for sure failing math though which is a HUGE problem…bc to stay on any team sport, he CAN’T be failing a class

which is why jeno was currently spending his free period, in the library, furiously erasing his wrong answer for the problem he tried multiple times to solve. it was the first math problem on the remedial work packet that his math teacher gave him for extra practice.

even his friend, smartass renjun gave up on helping him and went to go toy around with his telescope, going on a tangent about renjun’s alien conspiracies theories.

if only jeno could have renjun’s genius brain, life would be so much easier

slamming his head on the table, jeno let out a low groan of frustration at whoever decided that it was a good idea to mix number and letters together.

“dude, can you not?” he heard someone say from next to him.

he lifted his head to take a peek…and this is where you come in, glaring at him with murder on your mind

jeno’s just staring at you and the fool does not recognize you at all

NCT High isn’t a big place either so he would have come across you once or twice, but you were simply a new face to him.

you, at this point, grew annoyed at the boy who was just shameless staring at you.

“is there something on my face?” you asked with a raised eyebrow

slowly he shakes his head ‘no’

“keep it down, i’m trying to sleep” you warned him before laying your arms now with your head resting on it, faced away from jeno.

jeno, who was awe-struck for second at your frank personality, decided that it was time to have another go at the problem and looked at it again

yeah there was no way in hell he was going to be able to solve it, he was too fucking lost

atm jeno is like .000000001 seconds away from having a mental breakdown because if he doesn’t pass his test this friday he’s going to be benched and if he fails the class then he loses his status of team captain and his spot on the soccer team which he cannot afford to bc it was SENIOR year and he should be living in all of his sports glory right now

and what if he can’t graduate? he can’t be a super senior like lucas wong like nooo that can definitely not happen

literally, jeno, stop freaking out - sincerely admin minnie

suddenly while he was having an overthinking session, his paper and pencil were taken away from him. he watches as the culprit (you) quickly solve the problems on the piece of paper in record time with wide eyes

letting out a small huff, you gave him back the paper wordlessly before going back to your previous sleeping positions hoping to get back to your precious nap time. your actions leaving jeno’s mouth opened in awe as his eyes glances back and forth between the answer sheets and the ones you provided him, both matching up perfectly with no mistake

he looks back at your sleeping form and wonders if you’re an actual prodigy like renjun

but jeno also feels really bad for disturbing your nap so he lets you be and tries to quietly work on the other problems and review how you solved the ones he had trouble on earlier

except he’s even more confused bc there was more numbers and letters;; no comprendo

jeno’s brain: ajadkf;dskjhg;ajdsvf;

he contemplates ask you for help or a basic explanation since there was no way that jeno learned how to solve that in class (he did, he just slept through the lecture because he was dead-beat tired after a heavy soccer practice from the night before)

jeno’s fear of flunking overweighed his social awkwardness so he pokes you gently with his pencil eliciting a grumpy “what do you want, now?” from you

gulping, jeno mumbles a small “can you help me, i don’t understand how you solved this”

you looked intently at jeno not answering his questions causing the boy to instantly regret asking, but surprisingly you replied

“what don’t you get?” you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes and shifted towards the male

“i don’t even know what i don’t know”

i felt that jeno. i felt that.

he pulls the piece of paper between the two of you and points to a problem that you did with ease

“oh, so you’re so supposed to…” you launched off into an explanation filled with math terms that adds more to jeno’s confusion

sensing that jeno still wasn’t understanding, you let out a big sigh

“sorry, it just doesn’t make sense in my head” jeno admitted shyly

at first, you were gonna say something snappy about how even an eighth-grader could do this problem easily, you held it back because you actually felt bad since jeno was trying so hard

you also weren’t going to deny that lw jeno looked quite cute with that adorable slight pout on his face

“let’s just take it slow, i’ll explain step by step”

so you did just that, patiently teaching the methods and theorems to jeno who constantly made that confused noise every time you introduced something new to the table

the two of you worked through five of the worksheets and jeno was actually understanding it! horray!

you were explaining the last problem to jeno when he stops you with a question that was completely off-topic

“why are you helping me?”

it was simple question so you answered it simply.

“because you looked like you need it.” you shrugged “i was trying to take a nap earlier but it was too loud for me with your constant erasing”

“sorry” jeno said looking down at his lap, embarrassed that he was a nuisance to you

you kind felt bad ngl so you quickly reassured him

“don’t worry about it. you remind me of my idiotic friends, not that you’re an idiot though. actually, no comment.”

we love a blunt y/n.

you clicked the pen you were holding and placed it down, “i moved here a couple months ago so i barely know anyone. now that it’s senior year, everyone already has their own friend group so why bother trying to join them?”

jeno makes another confused noised at your blunt statement.

you wondered if that particular noise has some type of effect on you due to the fact that you have a sudden urge to explain your situation to the boy you hardly knew for more than the hour

“i used to go to miroh high, but my dad got a transfer here so he decided to enroll me at this school without my say. i left all my friends back there sadly”

“that sucks,” was all that jeno could say.

damn his inability to socialize like a normal human being.

you nodded, “yeah, it does, but it’s not that bad. my friends make an effort to come down here most weekend and sometimes i drive up there too.” you turn to look at him and jeno freezes at the sudden eye contact “actually, you remind me of my friend hyunjin. he was kind of a ditz in anything that wasn’t sports”

“wait, how do you know that i play sports?” jeno asked confused

“dude, everyone knows that you’re the school’s mvp.” you said as if it’s obvious “you’re not as intimidating as they say you are though.”

damn it

he was hoping you had no idea who he was so that could relieve his guilt of not knowing who you were despite being in the same graduating class.

at the same time, he was glad that he seemed to have made a good impression on you

“don’t worry, i won’t spill your little secret” you gestured to the worksheets which had red pen markings all over it, signs of jeno’s failures. you figured that the school’s star jock didn’t want the school knowing his inability to solve basic 12th-grade math problem

you reached under the table to grab your backpack, causing jeno to reach a hand out to grasp your wrist

“wait, where are you going?”

a part of him was afraid that he was going to forget everything you taught him once you left, but the other part was extremely curious about you and wanted to know more

“i have somewhere to go?” you looked down at his hand and back up at him “you have something else you want to say?”

sensing that his grip was making you feel uncomfortable, he quickly pulled his hand away. rubbing the back of his neck. he avoids your eyes, opting to stare at your feet instead.

“this might be a little weird, but can you please tutor me? at least until next week when i have to take my make-or-break test.” jeno plead, embarrassment rushed to his cheeks in the form of a red blush when he realized how desperate he sounded.

you let out a tiny giggle, totally different from your persona earlier.

you took his pencil that was laying on the table to scribble something on the corner of his worksheet. patting his shoulder, you quickly left the boy staring at the piece of paper.

don’t get confused (127) 312-0325 :)

a stupid smile made it’s way onto jeno’s lips as he quickly packed up his things in haste. he practically skips to soccer practice. maybe he even heel-clicked.

lee jeno is not failing math!

cute tutor acquired!

woohoo!

but also, there’s this weird tingly feeling that jeno has inside.

he doesn’t know what exactly it was but most likely it’s probably the reason why he was a goofy-ass smile on his face

“dude, are you okay?” one of his teammates ask after he gets hits in the head with a soccer ball

jeno, not even fazed by it one bit, just smiles and gives his teammates a big thumbs up

“coach, i think there’s something wrong with jeno!”

anyways, that night he’s extremely excited to text you.

imagine jeno on his bed, laying on his stomach feet up in the air, taking at least an hour to construct a response that doesn’t make him seem lame or a fifty-year-old man like all of his friends say he texts like

jeno is probably the type of person that texts, with all the correct capitalization and actual punction plus awkward spacing and usage of emojis

this time he tried to be chill about it

jeno: hey, it’s me, jeno. sorry for bothering you this late at night, but i don’t understand this problem. can you help me pls?

sent.

now jeno was currently awaiting your response….however, you don’t reply right away like jeno for some reason expects

he takes the waiting time to scroll through his social media and it’s the usual things he sees every day

he sees the juniors’ chenle and his weird little friend talking about some sort of prank they’re going to pull, jaemin’s spam post on how he was stuck making prom decorations to fulfill his community service requirements, etc

however, a sudden post from @/luccasss caught his attention

especially the girl sitting on top of an old blue car with the senior, middle fingers up

his eyes glance at the caption quickly

me and my main bitch fucking it up (pc to our little kiddo)

wait a minute.

jeno could remember you saying how you didn’t bother making friends w anyone, so what are you doing with the lucas wong?

now lucas wong doesn’t have that great of a reputation around campus, especially since he was a held back his senior year. he blows off class and jeno has heard that he’s in cahoots with the stoners on campus too

your account is tagged in the picture and luckily it’s on public, so jeno could secretly and shamefully stalk your page

while looking through your photos, jeno realizes that he really doesn’t know anything about…. you

tbh he didn’t even know your name until he saw your bio and username. (facepalm @ jeno)

scrolling through your photos, he saw you posing with other boys and girls that he didn’t recognize making him assume that they were your friends from your old school

his fingers land on a picture where you’re kissing a cheek of ridiculously good looking guy. checking the tag, he sees that it’s a guy whose username was something along the lines of cb_97

imma miss my ddy chan <3!! owo

as he scrolling through the chan guy’s instagram, jeno becomes more dejected bc maybe he was too deep in his imagination that he got from watching too many dramas with ara

letting out a sad sigh, jeno clicks his phone off and settles into bed. the more he thinks about it the more he feels insignificant to you which he was.

for all he knows, he’s just a random kid in the library that you helped with a few math problems

the next day, jeno walks into school with no pep in his step :(

and as his certified besties, jaemin and renjun drag him into an empty classroom during lunch prying him to confess what’s got him down in the dumps

and jeno knows he can’t hide anything from his besties so he just lets it all out

jaemin, taking a long blink after his bff’s rant to process the newly acquired tea “wow, bro. you got the feels”

“exactly,” jeno groans “i only talked to her once! she doesn’t even know me!”

“she knows you suck at math,” renjun points out

and jeno threatens to throw a chair at his friend, but jaemin quickly stops him

“okay, how about you just take it slow? like get to know her and let her get to know you. it could be that you’re just overthinking her kindness for helping you when you were desperate. appreciation is different from admiration” ngl jaemin was kinda-sorta right

“btw, who is this chick anyway? you haven’t told us who it was” renjun asked, sitting on one of the empty desks

“y/n, she transferred a couple months ago from miroh”

renjun abruptly jumps to his feet, “the y/n l/n? the new math teacher’ daughter?”

“you know her?” jeno quirks an eyebrow

“dude she’s in my ap calculus class and she has the highest grade, but she never shows up to class,” renjun tells him. “she’s a straight, badass genius”

jeno feels stupider as renjun continues to list all of your achievements and the art boy makes it seem like all of them were done effortlessly.

how stupid was he in your eyes when he couldn’t solve regular senior math problems while you were out here solving college-based ones?

now you seem like a person farther and father away from him.

jaemin, his good-ol-buddy knows that jeno is over-analyzing the new information renjun was telling him, and he tries his best to hype is buddy up

“c’mon, you might not be a genius at math but you certainly are on any field, pool, and court. have some confidence!”

deep down jeno knows that he should listen to his friend and that he should just be more confident in himself, but he can’t shake his feeling of insecurity and doubt

so the next time he sees you laying on the empty table in the non-fiction section sleeping, he’s a bit more reluctant to approach you. instead, he quietly sits in the seat next to you as he pulls out his practice sheets to work and miserably fail on

except you don’t wake up for a looong time until jeno accidentally sneezes too loud, causing you to awaken

opening your eyes, you see the boy look at you with wide eyes as if he’s done something terribly wrong by waking you up

“why do you look like i’m about to kill you or something?” you giggled watching as the boy in front of you became very flustered “why didn’t you wake me up when you came here?”

“oh, you look like you were in deep sleep, so i didn’t want to wake you up”

you stretched your arms out, one hand over your mouth as you let out an inaudible yawn, “don’t worry about it. i’m always sleeping”

you blamed all of your fatigue on lucas as it was his fault that you were tired out of your mind from the little night adventure he roped both you and a junior named eun (y/n from childhood-friend!chenle’s au) into.

honestly, if it weren’t for lucas’s annoying ass laugh waking you up from your nap that one day, you probably wouldn’t have befriended the big bumbling bafoon.

“yeah, but apparently i’m failing the twelfth-grade again bc i’m not allowed to just go to homeroom and p.e. i mean, who wants to learn about FUNCTIONS when you could just be looking up memes in the library?!?” - lucas wong, 2019

despite lucas’s overwhelming personality, you were quite thankful to have him as he reminded you of your old friends back at miroh, it was nice.

eun was a soft-spoken child that often had to turn to you or lucas (which wasn’t always a good idea) for advice that you both were happy to give to the underclassmen.

personally, you didn’t care that you only had like two friends, quality over quantity right?

“earth to jeno?” you waved your hand in front of his face as he stayed unresponsive

he mumbles something inaudible and points at a problem

your eyes gloss over it taking in the problem, before quickly grabbing a pen and solving it. you spoke slowly as you explained the step-by-step solution that jeno had to do.

when you look back at jeno to make sure that he was understanding the content, you noticed how the jock is off in his own universe and not paying attention to you.

“please don’t make me repeat that again,” you sigh, catching jeno’s attention. you capped the pen and lightly tossed it on the table, proceeding to stretch out your hands above your head.

“sorry”

“what’s up with you?” you asked, wondering why the boy who seemed desperate for your help yesterday, was now acting like he could care less. “and don’t give me that stupid, generic “nothing” bullshit.”

“sorry, football was tough last night,” jeno said quietly, focusing on the problem.

despite not being involved in the school festivities, you knew that it was well past football season. and that meant that jeno was lying to you.

there was a slight pang of disappointment, but you pushed it aside. what were you expecting anyway? he probably only saw you as a tutor.

you weren’t even his friend for fuck’s sake

“let’s move onto the next problem” you say, quickly changing the subject.

honestly, the two of you were fucking idiots. smh

despite there being awkward tension between the two of you, you’re tutoring was actually very very helpful for jeno. he could actually understand what was going on in math class now.

remember that test he had to take to ensure that he could play for his soccer match? jeno passed that with flying colors thanks to your careful explanations

even after that test, the two of you kept your tutoring arrangement;;;and maybe jeno was falling even harder for you.

he couldn’t help it though! the way you run your fingers through your hair or the way you puff out your cheeks when you’re trying to think of a way to explain something to jeno just makes leaves him star-struck. and every time he gets a problem right without your help, the proud smile that you give him makes his heart leap

it wasn’t like you were safe from the love bug either!!

lee jeno was hard not to like and he was even harder to not fall for.

the little cute noises that he makes when he’s lost, the way his eyes go wide when he finally understands the problem, and the eye-smile he gives you when he gets a problem right.

your heart literally went uwu when jeno offered you his hoodie bc the two of you were sitting underneath the ac vent and you were shivering.

when you tried to give it back to him, he just shook his head and said “keep it, just in case you get cold”

lee jeno was not healthy for your heart. uwu hours 24/7

but the two of you were stuck in this weird relationship bc the two of you weren’t exactly friends, but also not strictly tutoring. you would share laughs here and there, but then quickly it would dial down and returned back to the math problems

some times when he was texting you, he would send a cute gif to show you that he understood and sometimes you would tell him about something funny/stupid lucas+eun or your other friends did.

“just ask him out,” lucas tells you bluntly as the both of you chilled on the bleachers during lunch.

“hard pass”

“fine, then i’ll do it.” lucas shrugs, eliciting a hard smack from you

“don’t embarrass me, you asstwat”

“who said i was asking him out for you? that boy is a fine piece of meat”

“istg, lucas, i’ll actually gouge your eyes out” you deadpanned.

but big ol’ oaf lucas doesn't see you as an actual threat. and he reaches out to grab your cheeks causing your face to form into a fish pout

“can you even reach me?” he teases, shaking around your face

and this the part where you’re pulling lucas into a headlock, oblivious to the fact that jeno was watching your toughy actions from afar

he kicked the soccer ball angrily into the goal causing jaemin to duck with a small shriek to avoid getting his head decapitated by jeno’s fastball

“dude wtf!” jaemin shouts

“sorry,” jeno mutters.

jaemin looks over to where jeno was staring at and saw you and lucas being really handsy with each other. from that distance that the two boys were looking it, it didn’t look like the roughhousing the two of you were actually doing

you pulling his hair to them looked like you were playing around with it

jaemin’s buddy jeno be looking like a kicked puppy rn, muttering under his breath about his shortcommings

jaemin is bout ready to slap him upside down the head for having no confidence or whateves

“can you stop talking shit about my bestfriend now?” jaemin @ jeno but the boy is on a whole ass rant on why he sucks in comparison to lucas

“of course she doesn’t like me. she has a whole lucas wong and he’s 6′0 ft of handsomeness. he’s fun and exciting, i’m staler than a moldy piece of bread!”

can jeno just love himself??????? is that to much to ask?

“i’ll just never be good enough for her. i’m not her type, she can do better than me.”

cue jaemin intense internal screaming

one day, jeno was going to your usual sitting spot in the library when he sees lucas chilling with eun—a girl that he’s seen around with his friend chenle. they were both laughing at something on lucas’s phone.

jeno looks at the sight confused. cause like aren’t you and lucas a thing? like why was this boy looking really chummy with this underclassmen?

so jeno clears his throat to catch their attention and both of them look at him like “who tf are you?”

“where’s y/n? she’s suppose to be tutoring me” jeno says

a look of recognition flashes across lucas’s and eun’s at the sound of y/ns name. the younger female whispers something to the senior causing him to clap his hands.

“oh so you’re, jeno??” lucas says in this voice

and jeno awkwardly nods

“yeah, y/n is skipping school today so she told me to tell you to look over the notes she wrote out for you” lucas pulled out a notebook and handed it to jeno

jeno flips through it carefully, examining the words you wrote in your familiar handwriting; there was also a highlight code system and little side comments to help him

“thanks” jeno about to leave but lucas’s next comments stop him

“you’re lucky that y/n likes you enough to do that for you. she wouldn’t even tell me whats 4x4 when i asked her” lucas slumped into his seat

“that because she thinks you have chronic stupidity” the underclassmen said, giggling

“aren’t you suppose to be on my side you little pipsqueak” lucas says jokily, rubbing her head.

and jeno is watching the exchange, getting more and more confused

did y/n know that lucas was hanging out w another girl without you?

“did you need something else, jeno?” eun asked him

jeno is about to say no, but different words left his mouth

“aren’t you dating y/n, lucas?”

there was a silence that lasted for a good minute, both lucas and the underclassmen giving jeno a blank stare….

until lucas bust out into ugly laughter, bent over his seat delirious and eun was also laughing along but not to the same degree.

was it really that funny? jeno be staying confused

it wasn’t until the librarian came to shush the two did they stop laughing

lucas wiped away tears of laughter from his eyes “that was a good one!”

“what do you mean?” jeno asked

“pffft eun would rather date a rabid animal than me,” lucas said “she’s only friends w me bc i forced her to be”

oh! that was news to jeno

“besides, lucas isn't y/n’s type” eun revealed, shocking jeno

oh really now?

“yeah, you fit her type really well,” lucas stated nonchalantly.

eun is like BRUH WHY WOULD YOU REVEAL THAT but doesn’t say anything and kicks lucas underneath the table. she could already picture the pure anger once her friend found out that lucas spilled her secret crush that easily.

robot jeno is just standing there holding the notebook and deep in thought.

“is he okay?” lucas whispers, looking up and down at jeno. eun shrugs in response

bOOM jeno zoom zooms away and the two high schoolers shrug at the jocks before returning to looking at dank memes

jeno basically charges down to the only female he’s friends with for advice, ara. (go read my fucqboi! jaemin for the backstory!)

conveniently, he finds both his jaemin and ara standing at her locker talking. tbh it looked more like jaemin trying to flirt with ara and her ignoring him.

but right now his friend’s girl problems were the least of jeno’s concerns!

so jeno basically hulk yanks jaemin away from ara and has the most serious expression on his face “i need your help, ara”

“huh?”

and he drags ara off to a more secluded place to explain his current situation to, ignoring jaemin’s whines

“to be honest with you, i think you need to have more confidence. now that you know that she isn't interested in lucas, why don’t you just take the initiative to confess?” ara says once jeno explained to her every juicy detail of his hopeless love story.

“because i don’t think that she likes me. there’s nothing special about me. the only things i’m good at are sports and that’s not very interesting!” jeno exclaims “she probably thinks i’m an actual idiot!”

“jeno, listen, i’m only going to say this once, but please please understand that you’re a very special person, okay? you’re extremely hard-working, nice, and honestly very fun to be around. it would take a fool to not like you, lee jeno.” ara sighed, patting her friend’s shoulder “just shoot your shot. if it doesn’t make it in, it’s okay.”

but jeno doesn’t like leaving things to chance. he wants to be sure and he hates uncertainty.

“when you’re competing or playing against someone, you have no idea how the whole game is going to pan out. all you know to do is to try your best and go all out to ensure the very best result so that you can win. liking someone is like that, you just have to go forward and hopefully, you’ll be able to score a home run or a touchdown.”

that was sum deep shit

after listening carefully to ara’s words, jeno came to a conclusion

maybe

just maybe

jeno will take a chance.

reaching into his pocket, he pulls out his phone and sends a text.

jeno: can you meet me at neo ice cream later? i have something important to tell you.

y/n: yeah ofc. i’ll see you at 4

he had soccer practice today and for the very first time, jeno was skipping practice, his favorite time. the only time where he’s ever fully confident in his abilities, where his stupid insecurities can’t get to him.

this was more important the temporary self-gratification that jeno gets when he’s able to fly through practice with ease

lee jeno was taking a leap, unsure of where he’ll fall.

today, he’ll shoot his shot. and hopefully, you’ll catch.

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briarrosescurse · 4 years

Note

returning the favor bc ily 😌 flint/roza + xiang/vinh 🖊

aww, ily2 😳 gladly i'll serve some for you too 😌 just a warning, im rambling A LOT now

flint/roza

roza wouldn't at first really realize that she loves flint - she hadn't really experienced that sort of attraction to anyone before and first would assume she just enjoys spending time with him. however, one day it just clicked - "so that must be the reason why i always looks forward to seeing him!" after that, she'd do much more to get closer to him. it wouldn't take too long for her to confess as well.

while flint just calls her by her nickname, roza has pleeeenty of petnames for him in store. however, she called him flint-ey boy once and never again. she regrets that one.

when they first met, roza had assumed flint doesn't like her at all - not much of a surprise, considering how brutally honest he can be, but really, it was just a misinterpretation on her end. as time passed, she grew to understand he actually does like her, it's just... he's just being flint. that's how he is.

she definitely grew to appreciate and even love his ways. it's quite the change compared to how so many people coddle her, but definitely a needed one. he pushes her towards her best self!

roza likes to sleep over in flint's dorm room not only because it's, well, his dorm room, but also because she doesn't have as many nightmares as before in his presence.

however, she also tends to go into his room at night but due to her rather poor coordination, she has given berkeley a heart attack before.

lilia likes to have his fun and sort of tease the two for their relationship - much to roza's dismay. flint isn't bothered by it.

roza's father grew, strangely enough, extremely fond of flint. you'd think for an overprotective father to take a bit longer to warm up, but the first meeting went pleasantly smooth. her mother called flint a keeper. so he got the approval.

ever since roza learned that flint plays the piano, she has been wanting to perform something together - she'd love to make use of her singing lessons and not to mention, she does think it sounds perfectly romantic, for him to play a piece on the piano as she sings.

according to roza, flint is also a wonderful study partner! so they frequently study together as well

roza likes to use flint's lap as her seat and napping spot because she thinks it's the comfiest spot in the whooooole world! even if she does get thrown off it on some occasions.

flint does know of her curse - he had a suspicion before she told him about it. he didn't guess it'd be that, but he could tell something was a little off. his behavior towards her didn't change and if anything, he understands now why she grew up so sheltered.

this one time, as a gift, she had given him an antique violin that had been in her family's possession for a few decades now. handmade in the valley of thorns!

xiang/vinh

hoo boy. their... relationship is quite the complicated one. at first, xiang would have thought it'd be a casual thing like the girls before vinh. but something about her always made him come back - at first, it was casual as well, but... he really grew to enjoy her presence, albeit it'd take quite a lot for him to ever admit that to anyone. hell, he can't even admit it to himself.

xiang loves to rile vinh up - anything to see that stoic expression on her face break, even of it's just for a second. so he teases her relentlessly sometimes, he can be so annoying and obnoxious about it or just absolutely forget what personal space is.

the first time vinh had used her unique magic, xiang legitimately thought she had died - that, until idia reassured him that she was just in a comatose-like state. she won't ever know, but xiang was visibly distraught during that time. he just said "oh, i'm just concerned about a bro", but obviously, that was just his lame excuse. when vinh finally woke up, xiang sat in a chair beside her bed, deep asleep himself. when she had asked for how long he had been there, he just started to complain about his strained neck.

on that note; imply that there's anything romantic between them and xiang lamely just says that they're friends and what not.

his mother is extremely fond of vinh - she thinks that she is an absolutely lovely lady and is more than overjoyed that xiang has found someone he likes so much - well. you could say that. xiang doesn't have the heart to break the news. how she even found out about vinh is beyond him. his brother, on the other hand, knows what's going, but simply thinks she's just another one. he doesn't really bother.

xiang likes to be a show off and he likes to be a show off in front of the ladies - so you can guess how many times he purposefully put in more effort in front of vinh during p.e.

he likes to crash in vinh's room at random times during the night and because of that, he already has two shirts with large, burned holes because of flames. he refuses to stop.

whenever vinh blocks him for whatever reason it may be (him giving her the worst possible nicknames or simply just spamming her with rather inappropriate messages and pictures), it won't take too long for her to hear the sound of rapidly approaching footsteps. that's how she busted his foot this one time.

unfortunately, xiang being xiang, has dragged vinh into trouble before and is the reason her clean student record got a little dirty. he managed to get her into detention and it's something he brags about to this day.

her mother tends to freak him out. not that he'd admit it.

tender moments between vinh and xiang are admittedly rare, but sometimes during mornings, he likes to hold onto her during his sleep, nuzzling into the back of her head while his arms are wrapped around her waist. she's always so warm.

he brushed her hair out of her face when she was asleep this one time and he nearly kicked himself for doing something so cheesy and enjoying it.

#twst oc #[my writing]#rozalina von dorimé #xiang yu #flint remington #vinh torch #pen + oc ask game #[other]#[flint/roza]#[xiang/vinh]

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jenni42085 · 4 years

Text

Nervous <One>

Chapter 1

Evangeline “Lena” nervously shakes her leg and tries to let the music soothe her mind and soul. Mentally she is thinking of how much people will be upset if she just decides to trade in her return ticket sooner to be closer with her daughter. Her parents and his parents both agreed she needed a break and some “me time” but she wasn’t too sure if this was a smart idea. She realizes her daughter is young and won’t fully remember her being gone for a week but guilt still plagues her. She leans her head against the window and thinks of him.

Thinking of all the good things he is missing, not by choice but rather fate’s choice. 300 days since he was taken from her in a tragic car accident. She can still remember the officers at her door looking sad and not sure what to tell her. A wave of sadness washed over her as she felt the sadness that has slightly controlled her life the last 300 days. Some days were better than others but a day like today where she is flying to see her best friend Marylea in California with out her precious Eevee makes her a little bit more on edge and more time to let her mind wander to different places and topics.

Usually having the playful but shy 1 year old makes her mind focus on her instead of who isn’t with her anymore. She is wondering if this week will help her or make her regret ever coming out. It’s only a week she thinks to herself. A small part of her thinks that she needs a little time away to completely heal but the rest of her feels guilty for letting her family watch her daughter. Her greatest joy lately in life has been being a mom. She thought being a wife was an amazing thing but since being a mom she has felt like her life was complete. She leans her head back as the plane endures some turbulence, I pray this plane makes it, Eevee can’t lose another parent. With those final thoughts she drifted into a well deserved nap.

**************************************************************************************************************

“No, no, no” Jeff yells as he frustratedly throws the next headshot back in the stack of the others “These girls aren’t what we needing for his image! Does anyone ever listen to me?” As he says this he looks around at a few people to have them acknowledge him and his question. He sees yet another text from his client Chris going unanswered since he already knows what Chris is going to ask him.

“Maybe he could just not go because of a ‘medical problem’” he heard someone say.

“Absolutely not! This man is Captain America! He has great health and it really great with the press AND his fans. There is no way he is going to miss this premeire.”

“Well, what exactly is he wanting?” Marylea asks as she quietly places his drink order in front of him. She was still new to California and was looking for better work than being a runner. She wanted to write but she knew she had to first pay her dues. So until they thought she was ready to write, she’d be getting coffee.

For the first time in a long time he felt hopeless. He knew Chris never had any crazy demands, so he was trying hard to please him. It is not that often you get an actor who isn’t a complete douche bag, acts crazy in public, or hasn’t made a bunch of unattainable goals. Jeff runs this hands through his bleached blonde hair and grabs his coffee and looks at his new assistant. She hasn’t been there long but he knows she always got his coffee right and she was always quiet. Maybe the mouse is finally showing that she is more than a coffee runner. “He wants a real woman. Not a model, an actress, or anything like that. He wants to take a person to the charity event and movie premiere who makes him happy. Someone who looks like they go together.”

“You know he is our client and we will do most everything for him but, we aren’t a dating site.” Anna states flatly as she takes a sip of her water.

“Not the point. Happy people make for better press. The guy wants to go out a few times with someone who isn’t completely star struck.” Jeff knows what would make his client happy, he just has to find it.

Marylea stood quietly as she debated on letting Jeff know that she had a person who could possibly fill that position. She’s well aware that Lena hasn’t been seeing anyone since the death of her husband. And she had met Chris a few times and sat in a few meetings with him and honestly he seemed like a good guy. She thinks they would actually make a great couple since they are both so loving, giving, and most importantly selfless.

Jeff noticed that Marylea had gotten even more quiet and was silently debating something in her head. “Speak.”

Startled Marylea looks up at him like a deer caught in headlights. “I.... ummm ....”

“Well...”, Jeff stares at her slightly intimidating at her.

“My friend is in town for a month or so. She isn’t a model or anything like that.”

“Ok and ?” Anna replies with the look that Marylea shouldn’t have been talking.

“Well, to be honest. She’s black and quite beautiful if you ask me. She is single and honestly needs a boost in confidence”

Anna rolls her eyes while Jeff looks intrigued, “ If she is so beautiful why isn’t she in a relationship now?”

Marylea was really hoping no one would have asked that question but it would come out sooner or later. “Her husband died about a year ago. She has a one year daughter. She’s been giving all her time and energy into raising her alone. Even with that on her plate she still volunteers and fosters animals.”

“So no crazy exes?” Jeff questions. Marylea shakes her head quickly. “Why is she out here for a month? Where is the baby?”

By this point Marylea has decided to pull up a chair and sit down with the table of inquiring minds to the issue. “All of her friends and family think she needs a break. Her parents are watching her daughter for a week, then she is being flown out here. As her bestie, it is my job to get her back in society as a 34 year old mom. You know kind of get her groove back.”

Jeff slowly shakes his head. “This. This might actually work”. He stands up and stretches as he is thinking that this will benefit everyone. “The press eats it up when people have kids and everyone knows how much Chris loves kids we could have them doing events for kids. Depending how beautiful you say your friend is she might have a gig for a bit. But this is upon Chris’ approval though.”

“That’s fine. Hold on I have a few good pictures of her and Eevee.”

“She named her daughter after a Pokémon?” Anna replies with a smug smirk.

Marylea doesn’t appreciate anyone talking about her god-daughter like that. “No, her name is Evelyn. Eevee is her nickname thank you very much.”

By this point Gary has joined the group at the table and smiles like he has won the lottery. It’s not very often Marylea even talks let alone sticks up for herself or anyone but here she goes. “Meow! This little kitty is finally showing her claws.”

Hearing that Marylea blushes and puts her head down slightly. “I wouldn’t have suggested her if I didn’t think she was a good choice or that you guys had anyone who would fill the requirements you are looking for.”

“Good point. Well, she a beautiful girl and her daughter is adorable.” Jeff says as he hands Marylea’s phone back to her.

She opted on the most recent picture she has of her bestie granted it wasn’t the happiest day. Ezra’s funeral. Lena was in a simple black dress with her wedge heels to give her some height. She had opted to pull her naturally curly hair into a sleek bun. Lena was never one for a lot of makeup but on that day she wanted to look her best for him so she did smoky eye makeup and wing tips. Eevee was in her arms in a black tutu.

“When does she get here?” Jeff questions.

Marylea looks down at her phone. “She should be here in about an hour. Her flight from West Virginia left on time from the looks of things.”

“So we can meet her soon?” Gary perks up to hearing this news. He honestly was tired of looking through millions of head shots of females who didn’t fit the criteria that was asked.

“Yeah. I was going to have her meet me here to get my house key then get settled.”

Jeff thought about things and looked at his phone and quickly sent a message out to Chris. “Have her come here and we will let Chris meet her directly to see what he thinks. If he approves then you can tell her about a gig she has. Deal?”

“Deal!” Marylea replies excitedly.

************************************************************************************************************************************************

Lena rubs her eyes and stretches as she is one of the last ones to get off the plane. She didn’t think she needed sleep but apparently she did. It felt to actually sleep soundly and not have to wake up every 45 minutes or so bc she was afraid something was happening with Eevee.

This will be the longest she has gone without her little girl and it is kind of uncomfortable. Only a week. She continues to think of the benefits of having a week away and she isn’t really getting a lot of positives.

Lena takes her cellphone out and messages everyone to let them know she made it safely and check on her daughter. Once she knows everyone is ok, she breathes deeply and is enjoying the feel of the sun on her toasted almond skin. She doesn’t need a tan but a little extra sun would be great for the full on J.Lo effect that she likes. This is going to be a good trip. I’m ready for new experiences and new friends. Uber drops her off in front of a boring blue building, she texts Marylea to let her know she was outside and waiting for the key.

“Lena!!! You finally made it here!” Marylea shouts when she sees her bestie of ten plus years. Marylea practically knocks Lena over in an embrace. “I’ve missed you soooo much!”

“I know!” Lena replies just as excited as her bestie. “I’m loving it out here already. It’s so much better than Charleston.”

“Now you see why I hate coming home sometimes.”

“I totally get it. So what time do you get off?”

Marylea thought about breaking the news to her or just letting her relax first. “Well I don’t get off for another few hours. You can hang here if you want. And ...”

“I don’t mind waiting for you and seeing how much of a big shot you are from a small town,” Lena replies. She wasn’t really tired the nap on the plane ride was plenty of sleep. At this point she was ready to explore.

Hearing Lena say she has no problem with waiting for her made the stress in her chest relax. Might as well let her get her guard down then tell her, but it might be better to do it like a band aid. “That’s great! I may or may not have a project/favor to ask of you.”

“Shoot. Anything for you!” Lena replies with out thinking.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes of course. This is vacation right. What’s the worse you could ask of me?”

Marylea looks at her feet as they ride up the elevator. “Funny you should say that.... so you know this is my new job.” Lena nods and keeps smiling. “Well, I may or may not of gave your name to be a date for a celebrity.”

“Excuse me?” Lena relaxed smile went straight into a deer in headlights look. “You are shitting me right?”

Marylea shakes her. “I shit you not. They want needed someone who would go to a few functions this month with a client.”

“Ok but they couldn’t find a model or another actress?”

“See that’s the thing he requested someone who wasn’t in the industry. He didn’t want a white or ambiguously racial lady. He wanted someone real.”

“So you thought I would be a great person to fill those shoes?!?” The elevator comes to a halt and Lena feels her blood pressure raising. “I mean have you looked at me? And I have a daughter. Who would want to date me?!? Even if it is fake.”

Marylea can tell Lena is having a small manic episode due to the fact she was speed walking down a hall way in a place she has never been in. “Lena calm down please. Everyone can see you!” She squeaks out, even though the outside of the building looks horrible the inside has been renovated with all glass walls which everyone can see.

Lena turns around and stops in her tracks. She is feeling stressed but, she doesn’t want her best friend to lose her job that she has worked so hard to get. “Yes yes. I’m sorry but have you looked at me lately and thought to ask me first?”

“You were on the plane.”

“Not the point,” she replies with a grin.

Marylea tilts her head to the side and grins back,” would you rather have a smoke signal?”

“Yes.”

“Smart ass.” To that Lena flips her off then hangs her head down. “Look I know you aren’t thrilled about it but, I figure this is a good stepping stone for me to start writing and not being a coffee runner. Plus when I was told what they wanted I couldn’t think of anyone else but you.”

Lena’s face soften with happiness to know her best friend thinks that much of her. “What about Eevee? I can’t be away from her for a month to do a ‘gig’. I’m stressed out from being away from her after 13 hours.”

“They already know you have a child and etc., and it’s not even guaranteed that he is going to be cool with this whole idea my boss has thought up.”

************************************************************************************************************************************************

Chris nervously sat on Jeff’s couch as he waited for this mystery lady to show up. He knows that he asked Jeff for something of a miracle but he was starting to realize while he is waiting maybe he could have done a dating site. But he couldn’t kid himself he has been trying on and off for 3 years and every time he would think the lady was into him for him, she would start asking for help to “break in” to the business. At least with the girl being Jeff’s assistance friend maybe just maybe she has no interest is the business.

“Lena calm down! Everyone can hear and see you!” He heard Marylea whisper scream at a short messy bun wearing beauty speed walking down the hall way. Chris couldn’t see her facial features but her body type was that of someone he wouldn’t kick out of bed. She had on ripped Bermuda shorts with an oversized button down yellow shirt that made her skin glow. He noticed she has a few tattoos showing.

“Jeff.” Chris asked standing up stretching. “Is your mystery girl here yet?”

Jeff looks up from his desk looking at Marylea and the mystery tattooed girl walk into her office. “Yeah, I do believe she just walked in with Marylea. What do you think so far?”

Chris walks closer to the glass wall to get a better look at the girl even though she is still pretty far away. “ I don’t know. Maybe we can try. I still need to see her face to face and not from a distance.”

Jeff noticed the way Chris was focusing on the short mess bun wearing girl who was pacing around in Marylea’s office that he might have found something he likes. Granted the picture he was shown of the girl she was quite beautiful, hell she’d be his type if he wasn’t already crushing on someone else.

“Well, I’ll get Marylea and Evangeline to come meet you for a few minutes and tell me what you think. You know I’ll never make you do anything of this nature unless you want to.”

“Yes I know.” Chris replies still not taking his eyes of the girl pacing. Her body language looked like she was on the brink of a panic attack.

************************************************************************************************************************************************

“Marylea.” Jeff’s voice came over the intercom and made both the of females jump attention. “Is your friend here and ready to meet him?”

Marylea quickly glances at Lena with pleading eyes and her clasped together. She sees Lena nod her ok. “Yeah she’s here and I’ll bring her to your office.”

“Ok great hurry up. Time is of the essence.” Jeff said as the line when dead.

“You know you owe me right?” Lena looks at her while her hands are slightly shaking as she looks into the mirror. “By the way. . . You never told me who this ‘big shot’ was.”

“Don’t freak out ok?”

“Yeah, see saying that makes me want to not only freak out but panic majorly.”

“Lena.”

“Spill it Marylea.”

Marylea takes a deep sigh, “ it’s Chris Evans.”

Lena stood there a moment and took in who she just said. “Like Captain America Chris Evans?” Marylea looks silently at her and slowly nods. “ no way on God’s green precious earth. Have you looked at me and have you legit seen him?!? “

“Look, Jeff thinks you would be perfect for Chris. Just meet him first. Please??”

“Fine let’s go.... this won’t last long. He’ll meet me and see what I’m in and immediately turn me down.” Lena says as she links her arm with Marylea.

“Stop thinking the worst. Please. You and I could really use something awesome happening to us. Plus you are a smoking hot momma with a cute booty”

Lena sighs deeply and leans her head on Marylea. “I know we both do but how do you know that this is it? Like couldn’t we just win the lottery or something easier? Something less stressful?!?”

By the tone of Lena’s voice she could hear her friend was close to having a minor panic attack. She started breathing deeper so Lena could hear and start unconsciously breathing deep also. This trick has always worked and apparently still does now.

The pair stand outside of Jeff’s door for a brief second knowing the two men could see them. Marylea squeezes Lena hand and Lena gives her a nod of approval.

Even with the nod of approval Lena is wondering why me. Part of her is nervous because it was Chris freaking Evans, then the other part of her worries about what Ezra’s family thinks of her leaving Eevee for a week while she goes out with a movie star.

Chris can see the nervousness of the messy bun golden brown skin goddess as she is tightening her grip on Marylea’s arm. Good to know he wasn’t the only one who was nervous. He got a better look at her, she had dark brown eyes, an adorably small nose, plump lips that looked kissable, and a diamond stud lip ring on the right side of my mouth.

“Hello I’m Evangeline.” She stuck her hand out to Chris then Jeff. She gave them a strong handshake and nervous smile.

“I’m Jeff and this is of course Chris.” Jeff introduced even though they all knew Chris didn’t need to be introduced. The silence in the room started to go deafening and Jeff realized he needed to leave them alone to test the waters. “umm Marylea follow me to the board room will you?”

Marylea looked confused as to why they had to leave but she followed him out the room.

“So.....you just flew in?” Chris asks slightly nervous.

“Umm yeah. Just an hour or so ago.”

“Was it a good flight?” He asks as she walks away from him to the window. She is maybe 5’5 if that, which is adorable. From what he count on her body that is showing she has about ten tattoos. Never dated a woman with that many she must be a badass.

Lena can feel his eyes on her and she isn’t sure how she feels about this. Sure she has been checked out before but right now she feels like he might want more than just a date. “Yeah it was good. I slept most of the way so I consider it a good flight.”

“That’s good. So....”. Chris isn’t sure why this petite girl is making him so nervous.

Lena turns around to look at him; if she didn’t know any better she’d think she makes him nervous like he makes her nervous. She slowly crosses the room feeling his eyes on her the whole time. “So what exactly are you wanting or needing? I’m not a call girl. I’m a mom. And isn’t there a model or struggling actress you could have decided on?”

Her bluntness shocked him and herself. She was internally shaking even saying it but, she didn’t have a chance to ask Marylea any of these questions. Once it was all out she realized how rude she kind of sounded and that honestly wasn’t her character. “I’m sorry to sound so blunt and rude. I didn’t mean it to come off that way. I’m just .... I just ....” She stops again hanging her head in defeat, while plopping her body down on the couch next to the still stunned actor. “I’m just not sure I can be what you are wanting. This last year took a man who I loved very much away from me, I’m raising an one year daughter alone, I’m doing a week away from her and I guess I’m just not fully ready to come out of my shell even though I really need to.”

Chris sits there slightly stunned by everything she said. Honestly he couldn’t imagine how she is holding it all together but he admires that. “Well, I’ll be honest with you. I don’t want or need a call girl, model, or actress. I tried dating sites but let’s be honest they are. . . “

They both look at each and say in unison, “horrible.” They chuckle together and he continues. “I just want some one different to spend some time with. Maybe go with me to a few events. Not as a girlfriend or anything but just a friend. But if things develop I wouldn’t be upset either.”

“Ok. That I could possibly do. But I have a little girl who comes first.” Lena replies as she is slowly relaxing after his admission.

“Oh I understand that you have a child and want her always to come first and I’ll help you in any way that I can. Jeff said this was your vacation and I want you enjoy your time out here. Maybe we could go to Disney one day,” The look he gives her is meaning that he is honest about what he means. He isn’t sure of her whole backstory but he knows he is a smitten kitten with her genuine smile that lights up her whole face. “Can I see a picture of your little girl?”

Hearing all of this is slightly overwhelming and shocking to hear a man want to not only help out but also spend time with her daughter and want to see her. She smiles at him as she pulls her phone from her back pocket. “Umm let me find the most recent one of Evelyn.” She shows him a picture that she took of her right before she left. She was in a blue polka dotted onesies with her hair in pigtails.

He took the phone out of her hand examine the small infant who looks a lot like her mother with the same small nose and genuine smile. Her eyes and skin were a few shades lighter than her mother making him wonder if the baby’s father was white. “She’s absolutely adorable. So she will be here in a week? Is she flying alone or with someone?”

“My in-laws are flying to Japan so they are flying to Cali with her for the layover. I hope she is a good flyer.” She replies with a hopeful smile.

“In-laws? I don’t mean to pry but did you get a divorce?” Chris asked before his mind would stop him.

She knew that it would be asked sooner if not later. “No, he died in a car wreck right after Eevee was born. I want her to know who he was from me and his side of the family, I keep the connection always open. She’s their first grand child.”

He nods his head feeling like a dumbass for asking because he could see the slight bit of sadness come across her face when she was replying. With out thinking he puts his arm around her shoulder and gives her a hug. At first he felt her body tense by the sudden physical contact but she slowly relaxed in his arms.

“Thanks.”

“Thanks for telling me. And just being honest. I think that is why I needed help from Jeff because I just want to hang out and know someone genuinely. You know?”

“Understood. Just odd that you would need help.”

“Really? Why is that?”

Lena bit on her lip ring finding the words to say not realizing that he thought she was absolutely adorable. “Well, let’s see. You are very handsome, and from what I’ve seen in the media an all around good guy.”

Chris blushes at her comment. He’s never been good accepting them and wondering if the person who says them are genuine or not. “Thanks. I try.”

A small silence happens between them but not in an awkward way. “So, how are you guys doing? What do you think? Will this work for you Chris?” Jeff says. The way he said it makes Chris slump, since it makes him feel like he has to accept to be polite even though he wanted to be linked up to her.

Lena shifts her attention to Marylea who is giving her a hopeful smile. This is worse then being picked for a team. “We are good. I think we are meshing really well.”

“Ok great! We just have some paperwork to go over and need you to see his schedule and compare it to yours.” Jeff says as he crosses the room to his desk.

“Paperwork?” Lena and Marylea reply in unison. “What kind of paperwork?”

Jeff stops searching for documents on his computer to look at the two females. “Yes, paperwork. NDA meaning you won’t go to the press about Chris or any of his personal business. Nothing to crazy and he can fill one out for you since you have a daughter.”

Chris looks at her, her expression is unreadable. He doesn’t do anything to be exposed to the paparazzi but he knows Jeff wants to be safe. “I’d rather her not sign it.”

“Umm excuse me? Ladies I need a word with him. I’ll call you back in a few.” Jeff says with a slightly frustrated look.

The women nod and leave the room looking confused like Jeff. “Dude what’s that about?” Jeff asks.

“I trust her.”

“Maybe so but I think you should have her sign it.”

“I’d rather she not. What if I end up with her? I don’t want that to be a reason why she isn’t with me.”

“But you don’t even know her yet.”

“Key word is yet. I think we might actually be good together. If I don’t feel like it’s ok we can revisit it in two weeks”

Jeff sighs deeply and looks at the hopeful look on Chris’ face. “Fine. But two weeks and that is all.”

***************************************************************************************************************************************************

Lena and Marylea walked down the long hall way to Marylea’s office. Before the two got all the way to her office they hear heavy foodstuff coming their way.

“Hey Evangeline! Wait up!” Chris says.

“You guys done so soon?” Lena asks with a questioning expression. “Ready for me to sign the papers?”

“Yes and no.” The two women gave him confused expression. “Yes we are done and no you don’t have to do the NDA. I trust you.”

“Thanks. I guess.” Lena replies. “So how does this all work?”

Chris shoves his hands in his pockets looking a little unsure. “Well, we could lunch or dinner today if you would like. I know you just got into town and I know you and Marylea will want to catch up. Just figure a meal together to know more about each other and the events I have to attend.”

Marylea can see Lena’s body slowly grow tense, she knew Lena was probably going to put off hanging out with Chris as long as she could. Before Lena could open her mouth, “How about your guys do lunch since I don’t get off work for a few more hours then afterwards us girls can have girl’s night.”

Lena turns her head and looks at Marylea like she has lost her mind. “Yeah sure we can do lunch.”

“Great! Let me tell Jeff I’m leaving and we will be good to go.” Chris says cheerfully.

As soon as the door shuts, “Seriously? What have you signed me up for?” Lena says as she pulls out her mirror to make sure she looks decent to be seen out in public.

“You’ve signed up for a good time. I promise it will be ok. Just trust that it will be ok. I think you guys will get along just fine.”

“Yes yes, but you owe me big.”

“I know. Drinks on me tonight.”

Chris comes back to the office, “Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.” As the two leave Marylea’s office, Chris’ hand moves to Lena’s lower back to usher her out the room. This will be ok. This will be ok, she mentally chants to herself.

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#chris evans #chris evans x black reader #anxious

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