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#and i want to be at a point in my life where i can also . do that. but i can't
d4rkpluto · 2 days
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ꜱᴇᴄᴏɴᴅ ʜᴏᴜꜱᴇ ʀᴜʟᴇʀ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏᴜꜱᴇꜱ
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and i wanted to be kind and leave three mores spot for someone for a chart reading, £30 for any type of chart reading.
PREVIOUS
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♇ what is a ruler in astrology?
♇ a ruler in astrology is a planetary ruler, a planet that rules over the sign that takes over a house, for example, someone with capricorn in their second house, will have saturn as their second house ruler.
♇ my second house is ruled by saturn, and saturn is placed in my seventh house in astrology.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 1H ⟶ self value means a lot to them. distinct/nice voice can become famous for that. family-oriented or known as the most selfish family member. beauty and money oriented. very stubborn but beautiful, can imply that romance and communication is important to native.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 2H ⟶ can be self-centred, being someone who is vocal. can be someone who is frugal as well. might like to sing, cook and create are. stubborn. could be obsessed with future spouse and can be someone who likes to many money. can be very sensual/sexual.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 3H ⟶ very communicative. slow speakers or likes to take time to make their point. can be someone who likes to make quick money. pretty hands and hand writing. can be manipulative. values intelligent and siblings and cousins. spends money on food and travelling. beautiful relatives and pretty/loud neighbourhood.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 4H ⟶ values family and order. very emotionally distant and private. very secretive and easily hurt. can be someone who is protective, and might become the money-maker of the family. being someone who has a nice aesthetic, and might sound like your mother, or a prominent female figure in the family.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 5H ⟶ very creative people. superstars and values talent. could value children and be very protective over them. or could value healing the inner child. very intelligent and educated. very sexual and can value romance and sex. could moan loud during sex or could like listening to hot audios.
♇ 2H RULER IN THE 6H ⟶ troubles with eating. gym/health freak. can value order and good health. might like to speak on the phone a lot and can be someone who could love pets or animals in general. being someone who likes to win as well, very competitive souls. but can be critical or someone who fishes for compliments to other people.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 7H ⟶ money from partners or business partnerships. can value connections with friends, family and people in general. can have a nice/airy voice, family relationship might've impacted how you behave in relationships. might love to buy aesthetically pleasing stuff and can be known to be pretty.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 8H ⟶ very private and guarded people. family secrets can change them. gaining finances through spouse or a will. can be be intimate and values intimacy. secret siblings/family members. sensual voices, known for voice acting or even singing. could also be mean if they wanted to.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 9H ⟶ values intelligence and travelling. could like to be flattered. being someone who could like to trade with other people. can be someone who values philosophy or having faith in something. people believing in them helps them become more confident, another placement where someone fishes for compliments all the time. can gain money through creative writing or directing. can have a big ego as well.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 10H ⟶ popular business moguls. can be a famous vocal actress or actor. up-front person. nice deep/commanding voice. authoritative person, someone who values career, discipline and reputation. can be very self-involved and controlling. prominent financial life. coming from a respectable or known family.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 11H ⟶ popular friends, values friendship and being independent. gaining money from the internet or through networking. distinct voices might sound animated. can be a humanitarian. weird food taste, found family core. being someone who loves privacy and charity. people are curious about your family, how you earn money. could have a wealthy future, or wealthy friends.
♱ 2H RULER IN THE 12H ⟶ drains through money. retail therapy. struggles with food. might be paranoid. light voices but shady people. unexpected talent, people are surprised whenever they're good at something. a family member might've gone to prison/been behind bars. manifestors. could be interested in the fae, could have dreamy beauty. might disappear a lot, and can be delusional.
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masterlist
and i wanted to be kind and leave three mores spot for someone for a chart reading, £30 for any type of chart reading.
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wh1msic4lwasab1 · 15 hours
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⋆⁺₊❅. “Give you...whatever you need!"⋆⁺₊❅.
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synopsis: being the captains assistant ;)
tags: lots of possessiveness, manipulation (?), power dynamics, dom capitano, vulgar, explicit, fingering, facefucking, begging, degradation, penetration, creampie, you get the gist
wrd cnt: 2.5k
a/n: doja cat pls release generous ( lyrics from the song as title) and my life is YOURS… also partly inspired by the azeru audio….
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Drip. Drip. Drip.
Droplets of a custom blend of his favorite drink, warm and slightly sweet hit the bottom of a porcelain cup.
It was just something you did, something you knew The Captain liked and as his assistant, routinely did.
This particular evening it was as if everyone in the nation needed you. A task, an errand, or just had to stop you in your tracks to his quarters for some idle chat.
It must have been several minutes longer than when he was expecting you, which was far too long to keep the Captain waiting; occupied against your will.
His tea was cold by now.
Finally, you ran over to his door. The runway-like carpet ending and small tiles lining the entryway to his office, guarded and sealed.
But you were a regular.
The guard knocked on the door, “Sir, your assistant has returned” he announced, waiting for an answer.
It took a few seconds, but you could hear a faint “Let her in”.
You sigh deeply and watch the giant doors open and shut behind you as you walk into the dimly lit room, only candles and small lamps lit across the table and crackling fireplace that remained behind The Captain’s seated body.
“Over and Over. I must have called you a thousand times? More or less.” He spoke, his voice clear even through the steel mask that adorned his face.
“I’m so sorry-“ You quickly respond, placing the cup on the edge of his desk and folding your hands together. “I got caught up with some others- a few harbingers as well needed my assistance.”
He straightened his legs, now standing in front of you, making you back up just slightly due to his large frame.
“It’s as if you’ve forgotten who you serve.” He said, the point of his gauntlet nail scratching the edge of your jaw and trailing down to your chin.
“Who kept you so long?” He asked, quickly adding “Never mind. Don’t tell me, I’d rather not know.”
You have trouble knowing where to look. Not wanting to cause any more trouble for yourself.
“Now that you’re here…maybe we should get started. You’ll probably need to stay overnight.” He mentioned.
You nod, agreeably to not seem like you’re eager to leave.
You sorted out all the intel Capitano had been collecting. There were piles of data, equipment, maps, and so much more. You were the only person he’d let touch them. It was common for you to stay late, as work never seems to dry out. It was also common for you to be whatever he wanted you to be. Errand runner, liaison…or his toy to let out his frustrations.
Everyone sees The Captain for what he puts on. Respectable and professional.
Most of the fatui honestly confess to enjoying working for him, as he has been much kinder than the others.
He can be, but he has his limits.
How can he be so kind to you when you’re late? You dared to keep him waiting.
“This is unlike you.” He says, noticing you yawn as you flip through the pages.
You blink your eyes a second too long, “Oh- I’m sorry I haven’t gotten much sleep, but I can keep working! Please don’t worry”. You assure.
“ I’m not worried, not for myself anyway.” He adds, kicking his feet up on the edge of the desk.
“Come here.” He urges you, forcing you to get off your small little table in the corner to his desk.
He flicks just one finger and you follow, taunting you to his lap.
“Yes- Captain?” You feel your throat get dry as you sit on his thigh, big enough to count as a seat.
“Is there anything…you need from me?” You ask, insinuating a more personal form of assistance.
He hikes his foot up higher on the table, creating a steep slope of his legs that drags you down and forces you into the crook of your lap, hands instinctively hitting his chest for balance.
“This isn’t for me. I think we need to wake you up.”
You felt a small shiver run up your spine when his hands landed on your hips, “How else will you finish all your work?” He adds.
You let out a small sigh as you felt his steel-clad fingers wrapping around your sides as if your ribs were now armored.
He slowly dragged them down your stomach, small points sliding down the sides of your thighs making you arch your back and grind onto his lap, earning a chuckle from him.
With swift motion, he grabs your throat; dropping his mask on the floor and letting it roll off somewhere.
Your body tenses, and you can see the most faint glimpses of his face; still hidden under the darkness of the room.
Deep and rich, he speaks to you, “Take off your clothes.”
Almost as if he’d conditioned your mind, you do so with no complaints.
He even helps, tugging up your shirt with the finger tip of his gauntlets as you pull it off. As your shirt falls to the floor, you stand before him in just your bra and skirt, your heart pounding in your chest. He doesn't waste any time, his hands moving to your back, deftly unhooking your bra with practiced ease. The straps slide down your arms, and your breasts spill free, bouncing lightly as they are finally released. His eyes darken as he takes in the sight of you, exposed and vulnerable.
"Good girl," he murmurs, his voice dripping with approval. "Now the rest."
You slip your skirt down, letting it pool at your feet, and step out of it.
You stand there, naked and vulnerable, your breath hitching as Capitano's fingers trace the curve of your hips. His touch is firm yet deliberate, each movement sending shivers down your spine. Shadows play across his muscular frame, making him appear even more imposing as he pulls you back onto his lap, each leg now dangling off his sides.
"Spread your legs," he commands, his voice low and gravelly. The steel in his tone leaves no room for disobedience.
You hesitate for a brief moment, but the intensity in his dark blue eyes compels you to comply. You part your thighs, positioning yourself in his lap. The heat between your legs is almost unbearable, a stark contrast to the cool air brushing against your exposed skin. He reaches out, his fingers brushing against your folds, another hand squeezing your breasts between his thumb and forefinger. You gasp, arching into his touch, your body betraying how much you crave his attention.
"Please..." you whisper, your voice barely audible, but he hears you.
He leans forward, his mouth closing around your nipple, suckling hard enough to make you cry out.
His teeth graze the tender flesh, sending waves of pleasure and pain coursing through you.
You grip his shoulders, your nails digging into the tough material of his armor, as he moves to your other breast, repeating the process. Each pull of his lips, each scrape of his teeth, makes you shudder, your body responding eagerly to his rough ministrations.
"Captain..." you moan, your voice breaking as he continues his assault on your senses and his gentle strokes around your inner thigh, purposefully ignoring your sensitive pearl.
He pulls back, leaving you panting and desperate for more. His eyes glint with satisfaction as he watches you struggle to catch your breath. "Turn around," he orders, his voice firm and commanding.
You obey, swinging your leg over and turning your back to him…well, it’s more of him picking up your entire weight and shifting you into position.
As you automatically reach for the edge of the desk to steady yourself, he lifts himself off his seat, stepping close to your body, his presence looming behind you, his heat radiating against your bare skin. You feel his hands on your ass, squeezing the globes roughly, spreading them apart to expose your most intimate parts. Your breath hitches as you anticipate what's coming next.
"Look at you," he growls, his voice thick with desire. "So ready for me." He adds, flicking his arm down to release his hand from the gauntlet, thudding on the floor just as his last piece of equipment.
“Is this what you were thinking about in that little corner of yours?” He teases.
His fingers trail down, skin grazing the crease where your thighs meet your ass, dipping lower until they brush against your wet folds. You gasp, your knees buckling slightly as he slips one finger inside you, probing deeply. You clench around him, your muscles instinctively tightening, drawing him deeper.
"You're so, so wet," he murmurs, his finger sliding in and out of you, slowly building up speed. "Such a good girl."
Your head falls forward, your forehead resting on the cool surface of the desk as you ride out the sensations he's unleashing on your body. His cold finger flicks against your clit, making you jerk and whimper, your hips swaying involuntarily as you try to get more friction. "Beg for it," he demands, removing his finger and resting it on your hips.
"Please... Captain, please," you beg, your voice shaking with need. "I want more... I need you..."
He chuckles, the sound vibrating against your sensitive flesh. "Not yet," he says, "But soon."
You whine in protest, your body aching for release, but he grabs your hips.
"On your knees," he commands, his voice leaving no room for argument.
You drop to your knees, your hands trembling as you reach for his belt, unbuckling it quickly. You undo his pants, pushing them down to reveal his hardened length, already glistening with pre-cum.
You lick your lips, your mouth watering at the sight of him.
"Take me in your mouth," he orders, his hands gripping your hair tightly. "Show me how much you want it."
You obey, wrapping your lips around his throbbing cock, sucking gently as you take him deep into your throat. He groans, his hands tightening in your hair as you bob your head up and down, your tongue swirling around him with each pass. You can feel him twitching in your mouth, his hips thrusting gently to meet your movements.
"Fuck... yes," he mutters, his voice strained with effort. "Suck it like you mean it."
You redouble your efforts, taking him deeper, your throat convulsing around him as you gag slightly.
He tastes amazing, salt and iron, the essence of his power and dominance filling your senses. You hollow your cheeks, sucking hard as you stroke the base of his shaft with your hand, listening to the sounds of his grunts and moans above you.
"That's it," he praises, his fingers digging into your scalp. "Just like that... almost there...you’re working so hard"
His pace quickens, his thrusts becoming more erratic, his breathing heavy and labored. You know he's close, can feel the tension building in him, and you work harder, your jaw aching from the effort.
Suddenly, he lets out a low growl, his fingers yanking your head back as he comes, his hot seed flooding your mouth.
You swallow dutifully, licking him clean as he pulls out of your mouth, his chest heaving with exertion.
He looks down at you, his eyes dark with lust, and smirks. "Up," he commands, his voice still hoarse from his orgasm.
You do as told, standing up and facing him, your legs shaky from being on your knees for so long. He grabs your wrist, yanking you towards the desk, and pushes you onto it, your chest pressing against the cool wood. You gasp, your nipples rubbing against the rough surface, sending jolts of sensation through your body.
He kneels behind you, his hands roaming over your ass, squeezing and caressing the flesh before diving between your legs once more. His fingers find your drenched entrance, slipping inside with ease, pumping in and out with increasing speed.
You moan, your head falling back as his other hand circles your clit, rubbing it furiously.
"That’s it…keep making those sounds," he whispers, "So fucking wet for me. You need more, don’t you?”
You nod, unable to form words, your body consumed by the pleasure he's giving you. His rough hands continue to pleasure you, painting your ass red with just a single slap.
“Answer me.” He says, waiting for your begging voice before pressing his hard length into your ass.
“Yes- please….please Capitano.” You whimper.
You can almost feel the smirk that’s plastered on his face behind you. He lines himself up, his tip teasing your entrance, dipping just enough to coat himself in your slick arousal. You shiver at the contact, your body tensing in anticipation. Then, without warning, he presses forward, his cock sliding partway into your tight channel before pausing.
"Relax," he commands, his voice firm. "Give yourself to me completely."
You try to relax, breathing deeply, but the stretch is overwhelming. His hands grip your hips tightly, holding you steady as he begins to push deeper, filling you inch by agonizing inch. You bite your lip to stifle a cry, your muscles clenching around him as he forces his way inside.
"That's it," he whispers, his voice strained. "Take it all, my little slut."
Finally, after what feels like an eternity, he's buried deep inside you, his balls pressed against your ass. You gasp, overwhelmed by the sensation, by the fullness, by the sheer dominance of his presence within you. It's almost too much, but somehow, it's exactly what you need.
Capitano doesn't wait for you to adjust. With a low growl, he pulls back until only his tip remains, then thrusts forward again, his hips slamming into yours with bruising force. You cry out, your hands clutching at the desk for support as he claims you over and over again. Each thrust sends shockwaves of pleasure through your body, making your head spin and your vision blur.
"Fuck, you feel good," he grunts, his voice rough with exertion. "So tight, so perfect."
His pace quickens, his thrusts becoming more urgent, more desperate. He fucks into your at a monstrous pace, your body going limp. He picks you up, holding your neck firm from behind.
“Arch your fucking back.” He growls, roughly handling you into position. You can feel the tension building in him, the same tension that's coiling inside you, tightening with every thrust, every caress. You're close, so close, but he's not done with you yet.
He leans over you, his chest pressing against your back, his lips brushing against your ear. "Look at me," he commands, his voice a low rumble.
You obey, turning your head to meet his gaze. His eyes are wild, filled with lust and possession. He looks at you as if you're his world, his everything, and in this moment, you believe it.
"You're mine," he whispers, “Anytime another person- another damn harbinger calls for you- shit” He groans, “…tell them to fuck off. Captain’s order?” his voice thick with emotion. "Do you understand?"
"Yes, I will-!" you breathe, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes.
His hand slides down to your clit again, his fingers rubbing in fast, desperate circles. The added stimulation pushes you over the edge, and you scream his name as you come undone, your body convulsing around his cock. He follows right behind you, his release crashing over him like a tidal wave, filling you with his warmth.
You’ve never served Capitano with a cold cup of tea again.
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whimsic4alwasab1 ™ - do not copy, translate, modify, or claim any of my work as your own.
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genericpuff · 3 days
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What do you think about Reachel's new redraw?
I feel like the characters look good but the background is too gray compared to the original one 😕
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It's pretty rough, ngl. Not even necessarily because of the art itself, but because it's not a panel she should have ever redrawn to begin with.
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The whole point of that scene was to showcase Persephone bringing life into the Underworld, a place where only death existed, but in this redraw it completely lacks that messaging, resulting in a scene of Persephone and Hades simply hugging each other in the dark with very dead-looking foliage surrounding them.
On a structural level, the composition has gone from vertical to horizontal, giving us way too much empty space around them which, again, is failed by the background being so dull and lifeless; Persephone's somehow become even smaller; and worst of all (though I'm sure some people will think I'm overreacting) her hair isn't tucked up in Hades' arms anymore, it's just sort of falling perfectly over his shoulder as one solid goop of pink, strangely changing shape as if it's resting on something but there's clearly nothing there.
That said, my opinions should be taken with grains of salt because I also have a lot of personal beef with a redraw like this - that original panel was my phone background for like, 2 years, and the episode it came from is still one of my favorites of all time in spite of all the criticisms I now have of the series, with art that originally inspired me to want to learn how to draw like Rachel.
There's been a lot of evidence over the past year or so to suggest that Rachel has "fallen out of touch" with her own work and these redraws that she's been making lately feel like tangible proof of that. The context in which she created those original panels no longer exists so to try and redraw them fundamentally misses the point of why they were so iconic to begin with.
I can understand that feeling of falling out of touch with your own work, to the point of not even seeing the appeal of it yourself anymore, but that's all the more reason to keep moving forward, not back. The fact that she's still just muddling around with LO stuff despite announcing two more projects and seemingly not making any progress with either the TV show or Rachel Smythe Presents... it really does seem like she's stuck in limbo. The deadlines and contractual obligations aren't there to motivate her anymore, and while that may now have freed her from the burden of creating LO in such a cramped and unhealthy space - now being able to create it simply for herself - I think the years of working on it have definitely taken its toll on her ability to create the way she used to and so we're seeing those growing pains now.
The real bummer about it is that it's being celebrated as "growth" but it's about as much growth as the illustrated environment above - dead and bleak.
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i-starcreamed · 3 days
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Can I request how Megs would feel if he fought his beloved, reader needs to beat some sense to him and help him from being blinded with hatred. (Tf one plz) Also I want a good ending cuz I'm still sad about the movie. And if it isn't obvious cybertronian reader.
MEGATRON X READER
Obviously Tf One spoilers! God this was so fun to write, I just hope I got their personalities right. I haven't written anything this long in a while !! Also I never knew I'd be so much of a Megatron enjoyer until this movie...yeah, it took me this long.
[ cybertronian! reader Angst and eventually fluff, could be pretty rushed tbh but I just want him to healll. Very NOT canon to the movie
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You knew it wasn’t your D-16 the moment his optics changed. Or maybe it was the way he distanced himself from you and your friends in a matter of hours--maybe minutes. It was a subconscious, subtle shift, but one you wished you could have talked him out of.
You suppose you saw the changed D-16 once you made it to the hideout of the High Guard fliers. Your once-kind, responsible lover was gripping Starscream by the neck, his hold tightening with every word from the flier beneath him.
You glanced at Orion, Elita, and Bee, all frozen in horror. You panicked and you stepped forward, placing your servo on his shoulder. Before you could continue, he whirled around, optics burning with a cold, harsh light—practically glaring at you.
“Y/N…“
“D, what the hell are you doing?!” You demanded, your voice steady despite his glare. “This isn’t like you, this isn’t the way, come on.”
He didn’t respond. Instead, his optics locked onto Starscream again. He was seething, the flier grinning through the pain wasn't helping your case either.
“Come on, do it! Do it, don’t be a c-coward!” Starscream sputtered through glitching vocal processors, even as D-16’s servo squeezed harder, threatening to crush the life from him.
D-16 narrowed his optics, “I’m not a coward!” He roared as Starscream’s cackling turned into garbled screeches
You attempted to push him away, roughly shoving him by the shoulder. “D, stop it!” He shoved you back. The sudden force sent you stumbling, and when you steadied yourself, you found yourself staring down the barrel of his arm cannon. His orange optics were locked on you, but for a fleeting moment, they softened. It was like he didn't recognize you, but then he hesitated.
“Stay out of my way, from now on.” He said lowly, as if his words pained him. “Please.”
His hesitation vanished as the cannon swung back toward Starscream. You stood there, stunned, until Orion and Elita rushed over to pull you up. Then you just stood and did nothing.
You watched in horror as D-16 continued to declare himself as someone they should follow to victory. Oh, you knew how much he wanted Sentinel dead now. Hell, you did too. But you weren’t sure if this was the right way. You weren’t a bad bot. Neither was D-16, he never was. You had to do something...before things got bad.
You recalled the moment just before he…snapped.
___
“Y/N, don’t you see? He’s been lying this whole time.” “Yes, D. I see, I know. But—“ “I want him dead. I just-I need..I need to see him suffer. Look what he did. To you. To me. To us. We could have been..so much more.” He placed his servo over your spark, right above where your transformation cog was. He used to dream of you two racing together, having fun. Hell, flying even. Back then he didn’t know what he would transform into. “We can still be more, D. We have a bigger purpose now, we were given the ability to transform by a prime himself. We just need to..show everyone the truth. And we will. Then we can—“ “It’s not enough.” He blurted out, pulling you closer as if it was the last time he’d hold you. “You deserve so much better. I promise you, Y/N. I promise you he will pay.”
___
Things only got worse from there. You reached your breaking point when you saw D-16—no, Megatron—vanish Orion himself. You couldn’t believe it. They were like brothers. And now, your beloved had become something else entirely. And yet, you still felt helpless.
You rushed over, avoiding and pushing the other bots as you made your way to where D-16 stood. They all cheered him on as he was trying to lift Sentinel into the air. He was going to kill him. He really was.
“D, stop it! Look what you’ve done!” You shouted, stomping your way forward, frustration boiling inside. You slammed your shaking fist into his shoulder. Primus, you were pissed at him right now.
“Please, please! Tell me what the hell you’re doing. This wasn’t a part of the plan.” You pleaded with him, hoping you’d somehow get him to react. Instead, he inched closer, the same stance you’d expect of someone challenging you. “No, you’re wrong. This was the plan. It was what had to be done. How can I get you to see that.” He visibly calmed for a moment, reaching out a servo to brush against the side of your faceplate. Despite everything, it’s still him. And he loved you.
You hesitated, then stepped back. Oh, how it pained you. “I’m sorry. I don’t understand your goal.” You said, barely above a whisper. Time seemed to freeze, and he slowly lowered his arm. In an instant, you watched his gaze darken.
“Then you’re just in my way.”
__
Your hopes were revived as Orion, now as Optimus Prime, came back, the matrix of leadership implanted into his chest. Optimus had saved the life of Sentinel (perhaps a little undeserved), knowing there was another way to deal with this. But now he has to save..practically all of Iacon. Maybe just maybe, between the two of you, you can stop Megatron.
The fight between the two friends wasn’t solving anything, you only feared they’d end up killing each other. You got rid of your fear, inserting yourself in the fight just as they managed to gain some distance from eachother. He grunted as you shoved him harder this time, his footing a bit unsteady from his existing injuries.
“What are yo—“
“I told you, stop. This,” you punctuated every word with a shove. “Is. Madness!” You panted, glaring up at your lover. “Come back to me, D. This isn’t the real you. I know it isn’t.” You pleaded, he responded with an irritated grunt.
“I, am Megatron. Not D-16, I am not that bot anymore. Y/N, stand down-“
“No! You stand down! You’re acting foolishly right now! I won't just stand here and watch you destroy yourself and--” You yelled, going straight for him to push him again, but he stopped you with a raise of his cannon. You froze in your tracks.
"Back down, Y/N." He said with a growl. You narrowed your optics, leaning your frame right up against the barrel, hearing a light clink.. The glow illuminated your armor. For a second, you saw his optics widen. He paused, licking his teeth. "I don't want to fight you. But I-"
"But you will if you have to, right? That's what you were going to say? Do it then," Your voice cracked, "I have nothing left to lose."
He huffed, so be it. He lunged towards you, and you raised your arms, blocking the strike. You opened up to move his blaster out of the way, leaving your side open to his incoming fist. It collided with your side, sparks flying from the contact. You grunted, stumbling back. When he came at you again, you caught his arm, pulling him close until you were face to face.
"We're both being foolish right now, are you happy yet? You panted, he grits his teeth.
"Quit saying that!" He growled, shoving you away. He shot his cannon, the blast flying past your side. You slid to avoid it, earning another blast from him. He fired his cannon, but the shot missed. He was aiming wide on purpose. You blinked, you knew his aim wasn't that bad...primus, he really was missing on purpose. If you weren't fighting right now, you'd swoon.
"Are you missing on purpose?" You asked incredulously.
"No! I.. yes..no! Listen to me, Y/N. We can end this now, if you let me do this one thing."
"You've already done enough. D..."
"Don't call me that."
He lunged again, but this time, you sidestepped, charging into him and sending him crashing to the ground, the side of his face hit the ground. You managed to pin him momentarily, struggling to keep him from standing.
"This isn't what you want. Trust me.." You paused. "Megs. Please."
He tensed beneath you, then slightly loosened as you called him 'Megs.'
"This is revenge, it won't help you feel any better. Not long-term. You'll only continue hating and hating, I can't bear to lose you like this. It's...it's tearing us apart." You shuddered, loosening your grip.
Eventually, you felt his breathing slow to a decent pace, slowly, you climbed off him, kneeling beside him. He sighed. "I..I don't know how to stop." He quietly said. You leaned forward, placing a servo against his jaw. "I can help you. I will help you. Megs, you have me with you. You have..Optimus with you. We're all with you."
You both knelt silently for a moment, gathering each other's thoughts. Finally, he had the courage to look up at you. You might never see those big yellow optics of his again, but at least now they weren't so cold. They held some type of sincerity. "I'm..so sorry." He breathed out.
You almost sighed in relief. "You're still angry, and that's okay, alright? Now it's my turn to promise you, we'll deal with this differently. It won't feel fair at first, but it's the right thing to do. Stand up." You gently said, extending your servo out to him. He slowly took your servo, his grip as gentle, almost afraid of breaking you. Primus, how he regrets hurting you. You can see it written all over his face. He was blinded by rage, he was indeed acting foolish. His optics briefly flicked to Sentinel, still on the ground and honestly, grateful to still be in one single piece. He turned away before the anger could return.
"I didn't want to hurt you," He whispered.
You softly scoffed, gently nudging him. This time, without any defensive intent. "You controlled yourself better than I did. I wanted to beat your aft, D-- Megs." You joked, earning a small, bittersweet smile.
You took your servos in his, softly smiling at him. You turned to Optimus, who was just as relieved as you were. "Optimus, do you think Megs and I can help rebuild Iacon? The way it's supposed to be?"
Optimus smiled gently, looking proud. "Of course you can. We all can." He looked at Megatron, his gaze firm but kind. "I am glad to have you back, friend."
Megatron nodded, still tense but..accepting. One day, they'll be as brothers again. You just know it. "As am I." He said, turning to you. His gaze softened. "Y/N...I love you."
"I love you as well, Megs."
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alpaca-clouds · 1 day
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BG3 fans, we gotta talk CPTSD
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Okay, I have spend about a week considering writing this blog, but I really gotta say, that it is something people really need to understand. See, I mostly see this issue with Astarion and his depiction in fandom. However, I would argue that it is a thing that affects literally all characters that play some sort of bigger in this entire game. Including many NPCs.
But let me start with Astarion. See, I wrote the blog two weeks ago about people being judgy on people, who do not want to have graveyard sex with him. Mostly people will argue how Astarion should be allowed to have his agency in that moment - while I argued that whoever the player is playing should have also agency in that scene. Including the agency to say "no" for whatever reason. I also included that my Tav absolutely denied Astarion, because he was not trusting that Astarion in the scene really was ready for it, for a variety of reasons. Which is very much a valid reason for someone not to want to sleep with someone else. (Literally every reason is a good reason for that, mind you.)
And obviously there came the comment, that went basically: "As someone who was raped I am very appalled by you saying that raped people cannot consent." Which is very much not what I said.
What I said was, that my Tav did not consent. Yes, he did not consent because he thought Astarion was not ready for it - but he is the one not consenting. It does not matter for this whether his assumption about Astarion is true or not. Tav does not feel comfortable in the scene, so Tav does not want sex right there.
However... If you consider the drow orgy scene, Tav is also very much right. If you do that scene after defeating Cazador, Astarion is enthusiastically consenting to that orgy, but he still ends up dissociating during the scene. (And in that scene, even if your character notices it, you cannot go "Stop!" Which I hate.)
Here is the thing. If you are in the BDSM scene, you might actually have encountered a scenario in real life where someone was enthusiastically consenting to something - only to them realize, that they were not into it at all. And people can withdraw their consent IRL at this point. Only that in this game, obviously you can't. So within the game choices I will just start out with "no" for this character.
Still, that is actually not what I mainly wanted to talk about. No.
What I wanted to talk about is the other thing. I absolutely know that for a variety of reasons a lot of SA survivors do identify with Astarion, and I do not want to take that from anyone. I think it is amazing that we got a character with whom we see this issue portrayed seriously. And let's face it. Especially in tumblr fandom circles, we will have a lot of SA survivors, because the userbase of this website is majority afab, and many are queer. And we know from statistics that queer afab people are even more likely than non-queer afab people to experience SA at some point in there life. So, yes, Astarion is going to be embraced by this community makes sense - even without his dashing looks.
But here we get to the actual meat of the issue: Astarion was not just raped. Astarion was abused in a variety of ways - some of them sexual - over the course of 200 years. He went not through a single traumatic event, but an ongoing trauma that, again, lasted for 200 years.
Or to put different: Astarion does not have PTSD. He has C-PTSD. Complex trauma. The kind of trauma that develops when the trauma lasts over a long, long time, without the survivor getting a chance to ever really properly ever relax. Something that was very true for Astarion's time under Cazador. He was under constant threat of rape, torture, and other forms of violence.
While CPTSD is a form of PTSD, it has some differing symptoms - and additional symptoms from plain old PTSD.
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I found this graphic on this blog here, and found it fairly good in the depictions. (If you google CPTSD you will find several graphics like this.) It shows very well the additional symptoms, compared to normal trauma.
Generally speaking, CPTSD brings a lot stronger issues with self-worth, interpersonal problems, and emotional regulation. CPTSD folks are often prone to emotional outbursts (this graphic names anger, but technically it can be all other kinds of emotional outbursts - which is why at times CPTSD gets confused with BPD).
And Astarion is written like this. He shows very much all the symptoms of CPTSD. And let's be honest: That is an issue he will have to deal with for a long, long while.
But... As I said, the same is actually true for pretty much all the characters.
If you look at the companions, it is obvious.
Gale spent at least a year in constant fear of blowing up. While Mystra's abusiveness towards him within the relationship prior the orb is more fanon than canon (though the relationship was defnitely not an easy one), the "one year in constant fear of death" is very likely going to instill some form of CPTSD in him.
Karlach was a slave for 10 years, forced to fight in the hells. While she will also probably suffer from certain forms of PTSD more common in soldiers. Additionally I would argue that she also has some CPTSD from tiefling-racism. While she does not bring it up often... She does seem to have a thing there.
With Wyll it is a bit more complicated. Yes, for him I would see the kind of CPTSD I have - parental abuse related. Ulder was not openly abusive, but neither was my mother, and guess what fucked me most up in my childhood, despite experiencing some really bad violence elsewhere.
Shadowheart was abused by Viconia and midwashed and tortured and was forced to kill her fucking pet mouse. Bonus points that a lot of it happened during her childhood. She very much is gonna suffer the consequences.
Lae'zel... Do I really need to say something about her upbringing among the Gith?
Then we have Halsin. We know fairly little about his background, given that he is very coy in talking about it. But his "three years as a drow slave" definitely make it likely that he has developed some form of CPTSD.
And then we have Jaheira and Minsc. For whom just the... Well, look folks, the adventuring lifestyle would logically also leave you with CPTSD of some sort.
Even if you play a Tav who entered the game after having a very untraumatic life... They will spent what has to be at least two months with a tadpole in their head threatening to kill them - while half of Baldur's Gate is trying to do the same. They'll have PTSD after this at the very least, if not CPTSD. (Even though, let's face it, chances are we all gave our Tavs more than enough background trauma to go along with it, right?)
And same goes for so many other characters. The tiefling refugees. Our main villains (especially Gortash and Orin). Cazador. The other vampire spawn (duh). The list goes on.
So, what am I trying to say here?
Well, for once I just want to make sure folks understand that CPTSD is a thing that exists and while being similar to normal PTSD differs in some points. Including the fact that people with CPTSD have a high likelihood to make very rash decisions driven by instable emotional states, that might be harmful to them on the long run.
And mind you. In real life most people with CPTSD have it because either they were bullied for a long time, or were in an abusive relationship of some sort. (Abusive parents, abusive partners, abusive friends/roommates.) But even in those heightened scenarios the game represents for the most part - the issues are gonna be still mainly the same.
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slaaverin · 2 days
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Are you sure? Initial thoughts
Ah I've been rereading a post I made before AYS aired about my excitement and hope for the show.
How joyful yet filled with dread I was about what would be on display, what would be uncovered, and people's reaction.
In retrospect, I think AYS gave us everything we hoped for and more.
We saw jikook relaxed and comfortable, enjoying their time together, doing mundane stuff, with quiet and simple moments, or doing fun activities where they felt free and joyful and in the present moment.
My takeway of this show and jikook's relationship is their sense of belonging.
I hoped for a closer look into their dynamic and we really got that.
The way their relationship works is that no matter what they are doing (or not doing), you can see how much pleasure they are taking for simply being in each other's presence. There is a flow and an ease between them that never gets disrupted by anything. They simply adapt to their circumstances and keep being authentic and enjoy the time together.
They showed several times how important these trips were for them.
But in truth it showed it was not (only) about the trips.
What is really obvious is how much they value their relationship, how much care they put in it.
This is not about the trips, this is not about making a show.
This is allowing time to tend and to nurture this relationship they deeply love.
That's what most important.
It matters to them, so much.
Even with Jungkook (we can see it in I am still) crazy schedule. Maybe because of his schedule.
It was needed, it was even indispensable.
Now we have all the information, I cannot see them not making those trips before military. They craved it so much, and they loved it so much, it was for their own mental health and well-being, to keep their internal balance.
When your world turns upside down, when you are faced with the Unknown, your first instinct is to reassure yourself, is to go home, and make yourself a cup of warm tea, and do the things that makes you feel calm and relaxed. As humans we tend to do this, to take cover, to retreat, in the safest place we know, to ease our hearts and to make us think everything will be ok.
That's what Jimin & Jungkook did.
They went home to each other. They took cover into the ease and softness of their relationship, because that's known. Because that's safe. It's where they feel they belong and they can rest.
I understand why.
Such relationship is an oddity in the real world, it's once every blue moon, it doesn't come easily, sometimes people spend their whole life searching for it.
We can see also how much the dynamic is different with other members. Nothing compares to them.
I think jikook are aware of this (because they are smart people) so when you find something so precious, you want to care for it and keep it close to your heart.
It shows in how much tenderness they have for e/o.
Jungkook plays the "baby alpha" yet with Jimin he transforms into the most caring and protective.
Jimin is a selfless guy in general but we see how he truly deeply enjoys seeing Jungkook happy. "All for your happiness".
Damn it makes me tear up just to think about it.
They are SO LOUD. My god.
It is so goddamn beautiful to witness.
At this point I am simply happy for them.
Happy they have each other. Happy they got to show who they are together with no repercussions (because thank god people are still stupid! Blessed be the ignorant)
This show was a rollercoaster of emotions, but now we know, now we see, now we say "Ah yes, that's it. This is what this is about"
Forever grateful to them for trusting us like this with a huge part of themselves.
They really do love us a lot.
(I'm writing this as I should be editing the show, so this post is pure procrastination, let me to back to work 😂)
Thank you for reading 💜
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For all the very self-sacrificial Wei Wuxian takes out there, I think they may actually fit Lan Wangji more?
…Before you disagree, there’s a big caveat to this – I don’t think these takes fit either of them well. But it’s interesting to compare their default responses to situations. Both want to help others – but whereas Wei Wuxian’s first instinct is to redirect (redirecting attacks to other targets, redirecting enemies’ attention to distract them, etc), Lan Wangji is much more direct in his protection*. And generally, that’s going to lead to putting yourself in harm’s way more often.
My favourite scene to demonstrate this is when Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji (alongside Jin Zixuan) are protecting Mianmian in the Xuanwu cave. Wei Wuxian does this by redirecting Wen Chao’s attention to him, provoking him and causing him to step out of Wen Zhuliu’s range of protection. Meanwhile, Lan Wangji stands in front of her, blocking her from danger directly… despite being at a disadvantage and already injured!
Wen Chao was enraged, shouting, “How dare you! Kill them!” A few of the Wen Sect’s disciples unsheathed their swords, rushing toward Lan WangJi and Jin ZiXuan (...) the two boys were at a loss in terms of both weaponry and sheer numbers. Even more, after the past days of being constantly on the move, they were in quite a bad state, not to mention that Lan WangJi had been injured. They definitely wouldn’t be able to last long. Chapter 52, EXR translation
This is a scenario with high stakes (Mianmian’s life), but also with multiple solutions, meaning that their choices aren’t muddied by there only being one option. Yet we still see Lan Wangji directly defend – despite the fact that, if Wei Wuxian hadn’t intervened, he almost certainly would have died! And that’s true of another moment in the Xuanwu cave I never hear anyone talk about:
Before Wei WuXian could think of what to do next, his body tilted as somebody shoved him to the side. Lan WangJi had pushed him out of the way. With this opportunity, the jaws of the beast had closed, biting down on his leg. Wei WuXian’s right leg hurt from simply watching the scene. Lan WangJi’s face was still expressionless. He had only frowned slightly. Afterward, he was immediately dragged away! (...) Lan WangJi didn’t expect that [Wei Wuxian] could catch up even under such circumstances. He was utterly shocked. Chapter 53, EXR translation
Admittedly, this is a scenario with more limited options, which is why I mentioned Mianmian first. But his reaction stays consistent – directly blocking somebody from a threat with his own body. And again, he didn’t think Wei Wuxian could do anything to rescue him! He does not expect to survive, and we just… don’t talk about this???
(And note that when Wei Wuxian rescues him, he actually puts himself in less danger! Again, this is mainly due to the limited solutions – you can’t rescue someone who’s already bitten down on by blocking the mouth from biting down on them – but he’s still in a position where he does have the option to get out of the situation if he chooses (he’s not between the teeth! His hands are opening the teeth from the outside, his feet are on its shell, he can jump into the water at any time and does after Lan Wangji is safe. There is danger of the Xuanwu choosing to attack him, but his position on its own doesn’t put him in mortal peril, which is not the case for Lan Wangji here). So though it doesn’t give us that much insight into how he prefers to deal with situations, the dynamic is still interesting to consider with regard to how fanon!WWX is often treated.)
Now, maybe these examples are unfair. Maybe Lan Wangji here was very tired (he was), stressed (he was) and not thinking straight, and so he just didn’t think of other options that he would’ve chosen in normal circumstances. If that’s the case, it still supports my point – no matter his eventual course of action, his first thought/instinct is still to obstruct directly – but this isn’t just a pattern limited to this arc, and to such high-stakes situations. For example, look at his reaction when the Wens order the Lans to burn the Cloud Recesses (and though I’d be very surprised if Lan Wangji wasn’t stressed here too, he’s at least less tired).
Wei WuXian, “Is Lan Zhan’s leg related to this?” The disciple, “Of course. The first place that Wen Xu ordered them to burn down was the Library Pavilion. He declared that he’ll teach anyone who wasn’t willing to do it a lesson. Lan WangJi refused. He was attacked by Wen Xu’s people and they broke one of his legs.” - Chapter 52, EXR translation
I say this is low-stakes because actions won’t actually have that much of an impact – though there is danger, the Cloud Recesses are going to be burned down no matter what, so it’s not something you’re risking by not acting to prevent it. Yet Lan Wangji still chooses to directly oppose, to directly protect the pavilion as much as he can (even if that’s very little, and even if I do think the main factor here was actually his refusal to go against his principles and burn down the Cloud Recesses, not him trying to protect them. But that still leads to the same course of action: to act very directly). And again, that results in direct bodily harm to him**! 
But even in situations where he’s not stressed or under any pressure, we still see that direct protection is his default. Just look at the way he acts towards Wei Wuxian in the present day. One of his very first actions towards him (and pretty much the very first after finding out his identity!) is to block Jiang Cheng from hurting ‘Mo Xuanyu’ with Zidian – to quote EXR, “[Wei Wuxian] hadn’t been hit by the whip yet only because Lan WangJi acted as a barricade in front of him.” – and after that we often see him protecting Wei Wuxian from dogs, we see him let Wei Wuxian stand behind him when Jiang Cheng is angry at the Golden Core reveal (Chapter 102), we even see him protecting Wei Wuxian from things they both know he can face (Su She):
On the other hand, Lan WangJi gripped Bichen in one hand as he grabbed Wei WuXian’s waist with his other, pushing Wei WuXian behind him for better protection. In reality, Wei WuXian had no need for his protection, but he still leaned against his body with both comfort and compliance. Chapter 104, EXR
None of this leads to any harm of either of them, but it still holds true to the pattern of Lan Wangji protecting by physically putting himself between what he’s defending, and harm’s way. This response of his is extremely consistent! And it’s not just towards Wei Wuxian either – there’s a tiny moment in the Lotus Seed Pod extra which you could argue fits this pattern, where Lan Wangji chooses to physically hold the heavy roof of an abandoned shed to block the rain from reaching an injured man and a few other people, rather than trying something like using wood from the shed (including the four pieces of unattached wood propping the shed up) to build a temporary shelter for them until help arrives. The circumstances and therefore actions are slightly different, but the process leading to them is still the same – Lan Wangji still acts in the most direct way he can to protect the people from the rain, which does involve exerting himself even in a situation where there would probably be other ways to solve it (even if his Lan arm strength means he can hold the roof up without a problem). It’s not a deliberate choice to do whatever puts him in harm’s way the most, but directly using himself to protect people, whatever form that takes, is his main and default course of action.
The final thing I want to mention is that even Lan Wangji’s ‘big reveal’ moment – him being the one to take Wei Wuxian away from Nightless City, fighting 33 elders to protect him – calls back to this trait as well (MDZS is so well put together)! Once more, Lan Wangji is directly protecting, risking and suffering serious bodily harm as a result. Recovering took a few years!
…And yet. I never see anybody thinking Lan Wangji is self-sacrificial. I’d argue they’re right – but why? Why, when he puts himself in harm’s way more than Wei Wuxian does?
Maybe it’s because of something like this: ‘but he does this because he loves Wei Wuxian and doesn’t want to see him hurt, and protecting others is just part of his morals! It doesn’t point to any issue within him, he does have a stable sense of self and self-worth – at least there isn’t anything pointing to the opposite’.
Which, again, I’d argue is right.
But… does that really not apply to Wei Wuxian, too?
---
*And there are moments where they don’t act like this, especially for Wei Wuxian, but that’s generally in situations where there aren’t any other options which still lead to them accomplishing their goals. Protecting the Wens by… redirecting the Jianghu’s hatred towards other people? How would he do that? How would that help anything??
**It’s quite interesting to think of how Wei Wuxian would act in these situations, actually – both being forced to burn down the Cloud Recesses (or Lotus Pier, in this case), and in preventing (in this case) Lan Wangji from being eaten by a Xuanwu rushing towards him. The first, I’m not actually sure what exactly he would do (especially as nothing he can do will stop the burning) – I’m not sure he’d just go along with it, but I don’t see him just refusing to despite that not doing anything, either (especially since if he’s unharmed, he’ll be more able to protect his shidi and shimei if they’re in danger, since he’s a much more skilled cultivator/fighter than they are), at least not in the same way. Hearing people’s thoughts on that would be really interesting, actually!
As for the second – if there’s really no time to change anything about the head or its direction, he would probably do the same (with the only other option being letting Lan Wangji die). But if there was the smallest room to change something, I could definitely see him activating another fire talisman (to distract the Xuanwu and redirect its attention to the pillar of flame instead of Lan Wangji, even if just for a moment). And even if self sacrifice really needed to be an option, with no way out beside it, I think Wei Wuxian’s would take the form of redirecting the Xuanwu’s head towards him rather than directly blocking it from reaching Lan Wangji. When he does put himself in danger in canon, this is usually how he does it (see: him redirecting the corpses towards himself during the Second Siege, while Lan Wangji is protecting him and blocking them from reaching him… another nice example of their situational response!).
I do plan on writing a separate meta about Wei Wuxian’s tendency to redirect, though, so some of these points may be reiterated there.
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paper-mario-wiki · 17 hours
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I feel like I've ended up in the same spot as so transmasc before me: I have a lovely cis boyfriend who loves my tits which I love for him, but I am getting dysphoric to the point I wanna lift my lips and show a lil teeth when I see his hands coming towards them. Feels bad because they are his favorite and we haven't been fucking as much because as soon as he starts touching me I am out of it™ and get all in my head and freeze up. Any advice?
good god, brother. i am utterly baffled at why you have elected me as the strategist for this problem, and i'm even more confused as to why you have chosen to go into as much detail as you have.
but.
if i were to give you some advice on this
i'd say that you should consider a conversation with your partner about the long-term plan for the relationship. a "relationship" is two lives that are connected, right? and your life is not one where you're gonna have boobs for the rest of it (or at least based on what you've told me i would assume, should you have your way, those bad boys are gettin lopped off at some point), therefore it's pertinent that it be brought up, because it concerns your life, therefore it concerns the relationship, therefore it concerns him, yes?
now, the first and most obvious thing to start with out the gate is the boundary, made clear and concise: the hills are now closed, off limits to tourists. all discussions regarding this come next. make it clear that it's about something quite core to your identity, and something that does in fact cause physical pain (a panic response from the nervous system is pain homie).
this brings some followup questions (and remember, this isn't an interrogation, it's a dialogue to share): how does he feel about this? if he's against, why? for that matter, how much does it bother him? is there something he doesn't understand about your discomfort? is there some concern he has about your financial or bodily well-being with regards to the procedure? is it because it's vital to his attraction to you as a partner? if that's the case, would their removal be a deal-breaker?
now keep in mind, these question can be brought up whether or not you've got immediate plans to engage in the aforementioned lopping-off of your aforementioned Bad Boys, because the actual point of this dialectical exercise is to create a simple, easy to navigate, easy to understand conversation, which will set a foundation for further negotiations-- should you learn something new about each other, or yourselves, or the relationship as a whole.
either way, i do not think that letting it keep happening and keeping it to yourself is a good idea. i can understand feeling guilty about withholding some physical and emotional gratification you could give "easily" to this person you care dearly for, but trust me when i say that it's not the way to let it be. not just because it's unfair to your partner to secretly grow to resent them for a reason you don't want to vocalize, but to yourself as well.
you may not know it, but by keeping it to yourself you're slowly building up a resentment. that frustration actually shows up pretty clearly in your message. and even if what you're frustrated about is only that particular activity, that activity is irrevocably tied to another person. specifically, a person that you consider to be a pretty central pillar in your life. if that resentment grows, it can evolve into anger, hatred, fear, paranoia, and all sorts of nasty things. and even aside from the emotional and psychological damage that can do, it can grow into a physiological issue, where your brain wears out more and more due to the growing emotional distress ripping through your neurons with all sorts of "emergency" chemicals. like i said, the panic response is a physical pain, even if your body doesn't feel like it "hurts".
so. to summarize.
ABSOLUTELY bring it up. if you don't, it could become damaging to your relationship, and also your actual real life physical brain.
when you do bring it up, remember that the goals are to set a boundary, and to reach an understanding through mutual conversation. it's a dialogue, not a lecture.
when you reach an understanding, figure out if the relationship needs to be renegotiated in some way. that usually means new boundaries, or expectations. or maybe nothing! though surely your boyfriend can find more things to love about you.
that's as best as i can muster. you don't have to follow it, but hopefully it'll at least give you some ideas you can use.
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sagekiosk · 2 days
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🐍🐙🏹
Jamil, Azul, Rook x Reader — Yandere — Angst — TWST
You guys ; NOOOO SAGE,, ANGST AGAIN!?!?
Me ; you eat whats on your plate >:(( Hope this will feed you guys for the time being while I’m making the other fics, this is just a silly gift for @plumipal !! hope you enjoy plumi.
FOR THOSE WHO ARE CONFUSED ON WHATS THE PROMPT!! Check out Plumipals' yan twst tattoo au. Then this could probably more sense!
Also probably OOC??
TW;; Aww angst :((, pfft no I’m not biased w jamil, DEESSPPERATE BOYS, Jamil crying, Sad Azul, Emotionless(?) Rook, all of them hating on the tattoo, Bad grammar?, Rook watching you sleep, Rook's part is a bit short maybe.
JAMIL VIPER 🐍
That damn tattoo.. that stupid tattoo. He hates it so much, he hates it so so bad. Why? Why did you have to put that stupid thing on you?
And what’s even worse is that it’s because of HIS overblot. It’s because of him that you got that horrible mark on your wrist.
It’s all he can think about, all he can think about is that tattoo. He feels like he’s going crazy, like he’s about to overblot.
again.
He just can’t take it, he can’t! It’s always on his mind. You looked so happy, smiling, when you confirmed that you had that tattoo. You even showed it to him as if it was the greatest decision you made..
He just wishes that oh so beautiful smile was engraved in his brain. And not that horrible tattoo.
Poor Jamil, he can’t sleep at all. His eye bags are so visible under his eyes. He couldn't eat properly either, he couldn't bring himself to stand up and get fresh air. Whats even more annoying is that Kalim has been questioning if he's fine
Jamil just simply scoffed and told him he was fine. But really he wasn’t, you probably hate him don’t you? You probably despise him to the point where you don’t wanna see him.
Well actually, you don’t, he just can’t bear to see you. Whenever he does all he can focus on is the tattoo on your wrist. It pains him so bad for being the reason of it.
Seeing you would just make him cry right on the spot, he feels so worthless and horrible.
He couldn’t take it anymore, so he started to avoid you. Like that was a good idea..
It just only made things worse than they were before, Jamil also came to a realization that he can’t live another day without seeing you.
Yes, he does hate the fact that he’s the reason you got the tattoo. But he also hates the fact of not being able to be with you. He wants to spend every second of his life with you.
Literally like a week later you were met face to face with a Jamil who looked so close to crying. He looked like a wreck, unlike the usual stoic and independent Jamil you’re used to seeing.
"Y/n.." he called out to you his eyes stuck on the ground.
"Jamil.." You answered him. How did it get this bad? You put your hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong? I haven't seen you all week.. and now you suddenly appear in front of me looking like a mess.. no offense.”
Jamil balled up his fists, the hand that you put on his shoulder was the same hand where the tattoo was in. He hated it. He shut his eyes tightly wanting the image of that tattoo out of his brain.
"Jamil?" you called out for him once more.
Opening his eyes, now staring at you directly into your eyes. You could see the tears threatening to fall.
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry Y/n." he stammered "Please don't hate me."
"Jamil- why would I-"
"That tattoo.. it was because of me, its my fault isn't it? You despise me don't you." sniffling he grabs your other hand gently pushing the other one off of his shoulder.
He pulls your hand up to his face, your palm cupping his cheek. "I need you Y/n, I need you to love me as much as I do. I'm not second to those two right?" he continued tears slowly falling down his cheeks a smile creeping up his face.
It wasn’t because of happiness though.
"I'll be better, I promise, I'll make sure I change- anything you want from me, its yours. Just please.. please choose me."
AZUL ASHENGROTTO 🐙
When he first heard about the tattoo he couldn't believe it. He refused to believe it! You surely haven't marked yourself with those' idiots symbols, right?
You wouldn't.. yeah! Those rumours are just rumours. Theres a big chance they aren't true anyway. He would only believe them if he see's it for himself!
So for the first few days he was fine.. still overthinking. But he's just being paranoid! It's just a thing that.. will simply pass.
That was until he couldn't take it anymore. He needed to silence those thoughts, they were so noisy. He invites you into Mostro Lounge's VIP room.
He asks about the tattoo and you confirm the rumours were true. You even had the audacity to roll up your sleeve and show it off proudly.
Fucking ouch, he felt his heart shatter at that point. He wishes that he just let those voices in his head be.
"I- I see, good to know you have.. such amazing friends." he spoke bitterly with a smile. shit- he stuttered.. hope you didn't notice it..
He clears his throat, are tears forming in his eyes? He has to hold it in.. He can't look like a loser. Not in front of you..
He asks you to leave.. which he rarely does. His excuse being that he has a lot of work to do. But actually, he just wants to lock himself up and never go out again.
When you leave the tears start flowing. His elbow on his desk, while his fingers massage his temple. The papers on his desk were getting soggy, but he doesn’t care.
He could recover those papers but it would probably take so much for you to remove those stupid tattoos. Do you hate him? He thought that you and him already made up from his overblot..
He's been stuck in his office for such a long time. He's put Jade in charge for now. He needs time for himself…
The longer hes stuck in there the more he thinks about that horrid tattoo. It's stuck in his mind, and it’s torturing him. He can't let anyone else see this. He can't allow anyone to see him as a stupid little crybaby.
He just wants to sink back into his octopot..
But then an idea pops in his head.. he should think of ways to maybe, earn your favor and get his own tattoo too. Thats the perfect idea!
He tries to make up a contract but all of his ideas go to the trash. They're all so horrible! No way you'd sign these..
They're just not perfect enough for you! Most of them seem childish.. and probably stupid. If he gave one of these to you then you'd probably see him as an idiot!
"No.. no.. no..! None of these contracts are good enough!" he crumpled up the contract he was holding it and threw it into the pile across the room.
How isn't he enough for you!? Why did you have to choose those two! He's- He's your friend too right? He'll do anything for you!
So why.. why did you just have to get a tattoo of them?
He starts crying again, how many times has he cried? He's not sure. He continues to sob covering his face with his eyes.
"Prefect would never love a stupid octopus like me.."
ROOK HUNT 🏹
He stares down at your sleeping figure, your tattooed wrist exposed right in front of him. What is that, mon amour? A tattoo?
Oh! how beautiful, why hasn't he heard you talking about it though?
Oh well, at least hes the first one to see it. He bends down smiling inspecting the tattoo closer.
It reminds him of something.. no actually, someone- hold on, Deuce and Ace?
..Did you seriously get a tattoo of them? W-well, its beautiful! The beauty of friendship is truly amazing. Your bond between Ace and Deuce is truly something!
But why did you have to mark your skin with those symbols though? Couldn't it be something better? Like his name, or maybe something that reminds you of him..
He's your friend too isn't he? So why didnt you get a tattoo for him too?.. He's done so much to make you happy!
He's always tried to keep you safe too.. And to always give you gifts and appreciate for the things you have done when nobody did.
So why didn't you get a tattoo of him too?
Yes he knows! Ace and Deuce have been there longer than him.. But he could treat you better than they ever could..
...
he isn't sure how to feel about this.
So for that night he leaves early going back to pomefiore.
For the next few weeks you notice that Rook has been really silent. You dont feel like anyone's watching you either.
You haven't heard Rook's praises about love in a while either.. so something must be wrong with him. You invite him to Ramshackle so you could help him cheer up.
Rook is oh so grateful, he would be singing praises about your generosity if he wasn't so down at the moment. Rook needs you. Rook wants you to like him to the point you'd get him a tattoo of him also.
Rook finds himself laying his head on your lap his arms wrapped around your waist while kneeling on the ground. You gently run your fingers through his soft silky blonde hair.
Rook sniffled and looked up at you, and you could see a single tear form in his eye.
"My heart yearns for your favor, mon amour. I wish to be as loved as much as you love Monsieur Heart and Monsieur Spade. But It seems that you haven't noticed that yet." he whispered, his voice hoarse.
You tilted your head to the side slightly. You didn’t hear him clearly and ask him to repeat what he said.
He would’ve, but he just doesn’t feel like answering so he looked away from your eyes. You understood and went back to patting him gently.
He takes a deep breath in burry his head back into your stomach. "You’re so cruel, yet I still love you. The things I do for love." The things he does for you. He would do anything for you.
"I've never let anyone see me in this vulnerable state.” You’re so cruel, but he will still love you. No matter what, he will wait for you to love him back.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
BAM DONE. I had a little fun writing this honestly, silly little break. Thanks for reading up to this point. Sorry for the grammatical errors..
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insomanic-fanfication · 22 hours
Note
Hey, I really liked your Dick Grayson sfw and nsfw alphabets! When you have the time, can I request either of those for Jason Todd? Thanks 😊
Jason Todd SFW Alphabet
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Author's note: Of course! I planned on doing his anyway after finishing some of my drafts. But that's taking a little longer than I thought it would. CW:
Alphabet Under the cut!
Affection: How affectionate are they? How do they show it?
Jason isn't really affectionate, at least in open places. He's got way too many people wanting his head on a pike. Family and friends know you two are dating; however, if someone on the outside saw you two, they would have no idea. However, when you two are alone, his true colors bleed through. His personality is similar to that of a huge dog that hasn't figured out they can't be a lap dog anymore. Laying his head on your lap while you do your own things. He is reading a book, and you do one of your hobbies. Just decompressing from the day Comfortably in science and enjoying the other's presence. Will 100% fall asleep if you start playing with his hair.
Best Friend: What are they like as best friends? How would you become best friends?
Unless he needed to ask you for something, you would probably have had to make the first move toward friendship. Jason gets very lonely, but trying to meet new people on his own accord is not part of his personality. If he approached you, it would be one of two things; 1. You did something that impressed him, or 2. Dick was pestering him about meeting new people too much, and he caved to make Dick leave him alone.
Cuddles: Do they like to cuddle? How would they?
Jason hesitates to cuddle at first; it's not that he hates it, but more so, he fears it. For the most part, positive physical interaction is a foreign concept in his body. For the first few times he cuddles, he will flinch, and it doesn't matter which one of you enacted it. But once he gets to the point of cuddling, where you two can cuddle, he is relaxed? Your fate is sealed. You've created a monster! Anytime you're not busy in the apartment, it's cuddle time, and no protests are allowed. Will get pouty if you have to get up.
Domestic: Do they want to settle down? How good are they at cooking and cleaning?
Jason is one of the Batfam members who would settle down in a heartbeat, even if it's just for a year or two. He craves at least some normality. But if he does, no one can protect the ones he loves, at least not well, in his opinion. Unlike his brothers, Jason is an excellent cook and even a chef with his skills. One of his favorite early memories is helping and learning to cook with Alfred. He's also very good at cleaning, partly cause his spaces are the bare-bone things to live in. However, he likes to clean his apartment or space once weekly as a coping mechanism. It's something he feels he is in complete control over. However, if you find him randomly deep-cleaning a room or his apartment. BE AFRAID; he's not okay, no matter how often he tries to tell you he is alright. For him, that is grippy sock stay levels that are not okay.
Ending: If they had to break up? How would they?
Like Dick, if you two broke up and he was the one that broke it off, it was due to him having an episode. But unlike Dick, it would be out of paranoia. Jason would make himself believe that your life will be destroyed. or you'll die because you are dating him. He would most likely ghost you and not actually break up with you. Because the words would pain him too much to say out loud. Only coming to his senses after the episode has passed, realizing his actions, and imminently finding you in person, terrified he fucked up everything between you both.
Fiance: How do they feel about commitment? How long before they pop “the question”?
Jason didn't want marriage for a long while, too terrified that it would make something go wrong. However, the longer the relationship goes on, nothing terrible happens like he expected. The more the thought of marriage would come into his mind. Asking what your thoughts on marriage are one night while cuddling.
Gentle: How gentle are they? Both physically and Emotionally? 
Jason is incredibly gentle with his partners, partly due to his personality and partly because he fears accidentally hurting you. He's a little rough around the edges emotionally, though, mostly because he's not used to being a completely open book to people.
Hugs: Do they like hugs? What are their hugs like?
Jason hugs like a dad coming home after a long trip. He'll hug your waist and lift you, keeping you in his arms with the biggest smile. He'll kiss your forehead while you feel the warmth of his body around you.
I love you: How fast do they say the L-word?
Jason would be extremely slow to say the actual' I love you' wording, but he would make up for it in physical affection and words of affirmation. Holding you as close as he can while telling you how much you mean to him and how great of a partner you are to him. So, people may mistake it for love bombing, which added to his other behavior. But it's because it's so hard for him to verbally tell you he loves you. He feels he needs to say it to you in other words, so you know how much his heart bleeds for you.
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? What would they do?
Jason gets super jealous; he won't control who you talk to or anything like that. He knows you have a life outside your guy's relationship, and it's not his place to manage. But he's protective of you and gets jealous when others flirt with you because, in the back of his mind, it's hard for him to believe someone would date him. So he's worried that you'll find someone more accessible to love, and you'll give up on him. Does it sound balls off the wall crazy? Yes, but mental illness is rarely something that likes to make sense.
Kissing: What are their kisses like? Where do they like to be kissed/ kiss you? 
Jason loves it when you kiss places on him that are generally done on the submissive partner, such as his knuckles, neck, forehead, etc. He finds them so comforting and feels very loved.
Little ones: How are they around kids?
Jason is great around kids unless it's his brothers. Generally speaking, though, he's very good with kids. Sometimes, he understands what's okay for a kid or not. He'll let a toddler he's watching fidget with an unloaded gun if they are very interested in it. But he'll explain to the kid in terms they understand gun safety and how you know a gun is loaded or not. Telling the kid you never treat a gun like it's a toy. It is a 100% safe choice for a kid to go to if they can't find their parent.
Morning: How are they during the mornings?
He's a morning person but a lazy morning person. He'll wake up at 5-6 and do dishes, eat, and do morning stretches, but he will not do any actual work until around noon. God forbid the poor man has a morning shift, no matter what his day job is. He'll be the grumpiest man in the world, but he hides it well from clients/ customers. Some of his coworkers get very confused of this very quick change of mood, but others just see that, and think 'Same brick wall dude, Same'.
Nights: How are they spent with them?
He is a huge Night Owl, wither that be doing the bulk of his work at Night, or having a nice cuddle session with you while having a smoke on the fire escape of the apartment. He is a very light sleeper, or deep sleep with every hour or so waking back up. He also has a lot of night terrors, so he tends to avoid sleep, ESPECIALLY if you are staying over at his place. He has a lot of 'what if i hurt you..' paranoia.
Open: When would they start revealing things about themselves?
Try to get Jason to open up, is like trying to open a can with no can opener. You may have be in a relationship with him for 5 years, and still not know everything about him. Not because he doesn't trust you not to use that against him. But because he struggles with knowing WHEN to open up about things in a relationship. He wants to make sure your twos relationship is a healthy as it can be, which every now and then dose end up causing problems. Especially when he's having a ptsd episode and you feel helpless within how to help him through it.
Patience: How easily angered are they?
He tries to be a laid back person, tries to be, is the wording there, he doesn't have a hair thin trigger, but sometimes his trauma just gets triggers by something he doesn't even see the connection to, so he's in a pissed off fight response for a bit. He does, however go to anger management therapy to try and help these behavior issues. But somethings slip through the cracks before they can be brought up in therapy. This does not stop him from bragging to his siblings, that he's the only one taking care of his mental health.
Quizzes: They remember everything or nothing about you?
It's like a scale, sometimes he remembers everything, other times he can't remember your favorite hoodie, (it's the one that's been used as a pillowcase for 3 months, because he missed holding you). He can dissociate for a long awhile, but him also bottling up his emotions plays a bigger role in this.
Remember: What is their favorite memory in the relationship?
The first time you fell asleep while cuddling with him. You both were watching cheesy 90s slashers for Halloween night, snuggled in almost a cocoon of blankets and snacks. When he turned to check on why you had been so quiet, you had falling asleep while being snuggled so far into him, that he half expected for you to fuse into his side. The amount of trust you had for him, the emotions he felt was too much and he ended up crying for the first time in years. the tears feeling like they were burning his eyes, but it's still a memory he holds closest to his heart.
Security: How protective are they? How would you protect each other?
No matter what your appearance is, wither that be tall and lanky or short n stout. Jason tends not to need a lot of physical protection, but you are most defiantly the protector of his emotional peace and social battery. Think of it like a Pitbull done with his guarding of the house for the day, so runs to their favorite human to become the biggest cuddle bug on earth. That's Jason Todd, (He's very Resurce dog coded, don't blame me, blame DC). He very much, however, is scary looking guard dog for you. He could kill someone with his death glare sometimes.
Try: How much effort would they put into dates, gifts, anniversaries, etc?
Jason puts an extreme amount of effort into your anniversaries, gifts and dates! He's not a social able person, so don't expect fancy Lucious dinner dates at a 5 star restaurant. They make him very uncomfortable, thinking everyone's eyes are on him. But he will make you the most romantic and gushy homemade dinners, your favorite flowers or candy. Cooking Red type pastas with red wine or cooking a Hispanic dish that learned while growing up around crime ally.
Ugly: What are some bad habits of theirs?
He has a bad habit of pushing you away, instead of telling you what's up. For better, or for worse. Sometimes it's because his crime lord days caught up to close to him, and for your safety he pushed you away. Or on the worse side of things, he's terrified you'll look at him as a monster or not understand where he's coming from with his trauma and his poor mental health, so he tries to keep them from you as long as possible, until he has no choice to tell you, or lose the relationship he has built with you.
Vanity: How concerned are they with their looks?
Honestly, Yes and no, like he cares about his looks more than a person would think, but like.. slightly more. He's not gonna shower every single day on the dot and shave his pubic hair into a sharp clean design. But he absolutely cares about keeping up good hygiene. Though he does have issues with cleaning his teeth, nothings rotting in there, but he is brushing his teeth waaay less than he really should be.
Whole: Would they feel incomplete without you?
No, unless you two date each other until your 4 years into retirement and you die of old age. He will be able to feel the same before you to started dating, because he feels incomplete on a regular basis. Like he isn't able to do enough, BE a enough for anyone to see him how he is as a person now.
Xtra: Random headcanon for them?
Jason use to smoke weed, especially in his teen years, regularly. But now he smokes cigs, problary Marlboro's or Lucky Strikes maybe Camels , and eats edibles every now and then to help with muscle pain and mood swings. (he still hasn't figure out if meds are worth not being able to have a beer whenever he wants.)
He knows he has PTSD, maybe C-PTSD, however he's not quite sure or not that he has BPD or a similar disorder, he's mainly just not internally ready to know the answer to that part of himself just yet. He's barely processed his feelings towards his Mother, so he's not there yet in his healing journey.
Yuck: What are some things they don’t like, in general, or in a partner?
if you have bad few of poor people or think poor people are only poor because they chose to be. Than I'm sorry, but Jason is more likely to pop a bullet in your head than he is to see you in a good light, let alone a romantic one.
Zzz: What is their sleeping habit?
Either waking up every 1 to 2 hours, or only sleeping 30mins to 3 hours and then staying up for the rest of the night or start cleaning or smoking a cig outside.
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fuji-sen · 2 days
Text
the 'evil imposter' just wants to be a baker!
Prologue: The Food turned Imposter?!
Part 1: Sunsettias.
[ masterlist ] || [ part 2 ]
🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯
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⌞Forest of Color: ⌝
⌞A salad made from fresh fruit and vegetables. Blanch the Grainfruit, chop the other ingredients, drizzle over the sauce, then stir until evenly mixed. Extremely simple to make, but even more importantly, it's so healthy that no matter how much you eat, you won't feel stressed!⌝
You stared at the in-game meal right in front of you, it was a late friday night and you were wasting the hours away curiously reading and looking through the official page that contained all of the food and drinks that could be found in your comfort game, Genshin Impact.
As a student in the culinary course and a rather enthusiastic foodie, one of the factors you always looked for when playing or finding a certain game or watching a particular show was their cuisine!
Just staring at the delicious looking, not-real, food always got your appetite running. Part of your little hobby was trying to even recreate certain dishes like those foodtubers did in youtube! Right now while mentally eating the pixelated dish in your mind, you were also picking the next food you'd try to recreate.
'Perhaps I should pick from star rail, none of the food here has picked my fancy. .' you thought to yourself while leaning back on your chair and making a point to stroke your chin with a thoughtful expression. 'Ah! how about the Mondstadt hash browns, I could even try to make Razor's variant dish!'
Snapping your fingers you immediately went to the kitchens, mentally patting yourself on the back for going grocery shopping the day before. So like usual, in the comfort of your own apartment, you began to cook, then eat and clean up, before retiring to your bedroom, dozing off with a full stomach and a lazy smile.
Z z z. . .
"Huh?" You swat at your face before sneezing, immediately standing up as you felt something tickling your face, what fell from your face and onto your lap was a pristine white feather.
Immediately standing up, finding yourself out of bed, no, out of your own room and seemingly not even in your fucking city as you started at the environment before you. Lush, verdant grass that swayed with the winds. Birds chirping as they flew high and above your form, some scattering the same feathers that made you sneeze.
A wave of fear and confusion washed over you, you were afraid as you began to realize this wasn't a dream when you ran, and ran, and tripped. Part of your pajama pants had been ruined and vaguely you can feel the blood dripped down on your leg from your fresh injury.
Wincing you stand up, not bothering to look as it as you cried out, wondering, where the hell were you?
. . .
It probably took you a few hours to get your bearings, sitting by a tree as you hugged your knees and contemplated your existence, did you screw with some God or Rich Asshole and they decided to kidnap you and dump you in the middle of nowhere as revenge?
Nah, you were antisocial, so screwing with some rich guy was highly unlike with your lack of a social life. You bit your nails, was it God? "At least give me a sign of where I am!" you shout frustrated as you pulled at your locks.
"Ouch!" Wincing, you rubbed the top part of your head as something fell on it, the perpetrator was round, yellow and orange in color. Your eyes widened, silently grabbing it as you ignored the now dulling pain in your head. .
It was plump, fragrant. .
you bit it.
It tasted sweet.
you ignored the juice that dribbled down you chin as you nodded, yes, this was how you imagined Sunsettia's would taste like base on it's description.
you blinked, jaw dropping.
Sunsettias. .
fuck you were in Teyvat, basically Genshin Impact.
A part of you felt like you were screwed, considering how all of your worldly possessions were gone, and you were here in nothing but your pockets. One hand went to pat the pockets of your pajamas. .
Eyes lighting up as you felt something, pulling that item out, you were speechless as your hand simply held an old expired coupon for some ramen. . .
screwed it is then.
🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯🥖🍞🥐🥨🥪🥯
I need to find a banner to use for the series, also also although I put in Baker, the reader will also make dishes, both from in-game and in real lifeee so if you want a particular dish featured in a future chapter, add the recommended dish in my ASKS so it can be a surprise for other readers! Please also add information about that dish since I may most likely not be familiar with themm
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lulunothulu · 22 hours
Note
There's not many Glen Powell stories could you do one for me plz:)
So Glen and Reader have been dating about a year. she's not in the entertainment industry she is just a RN he ask her to join him for the press tour for Twitters overseas. She goes with Glen to do some interviews and over hears a conversation where people think she is just with Glen for the money and everyone sees it. She's never asked Glen for money or help but he does occasionally do things for her out of love. She starts to pick up alot of extra shifts at the hospital and dip into her savings to afford all that stuff for the press tour to the point she's passes out one day after working 3 doubles in a row. Glen shows up and ask why she has been working so much and she comes clean about what she heard and how she dipped into her saving to afford the trip. He comforts her and makes her feel better and let's her know he knows she loves him for him and not his money and he asked her to come on the trip bc he wanted her there and he loves her and he loves to spoil her that's not gonna change.
I absolutely LOVE this one 😭 as a former ER worker I live for this.
“Just ordinary”
Glen Powell x Reader
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“So Glen,” the interviewer asks. “Who are you bringing to the London premiere?”
Glen smiles, looking behind the interviewer to where you stand with his publicist behind the stage.
“I’m bringing my girlfriend, Y/N,” he smiles, winking in your direction.
You make a mental note to check how much flights would cost but smile back at him.
“Ooo! What does she do? Is she an actress?”
“She’s actually an ER nurse,” he boasts. “I’m so lucky to have her in my life and to be able to feel so safe with her around me.”
“I bet,” they say. “Having someone there to nurse you to health even if you’re not sick must be so rewarding.”
“It is!” He beams. “I love that she takes care of me and makes sure I stay healthy. It also helps when I get injured on the job.”
“That’s so sweet,” they tell him. “Well, that’s all the time we have today. Make sure you catch Twisters in theaters near you!”
After the interview, Glen walks up to where you’re waiting and interlaces his fingers with yours before pulling you close to kiss you deeply.
“We’re almost done, I just have to do some mini interviews outside and then we can head home.”
You nod, and smile up at him. You knew the drill. After an interview inside, there would be fans all over the place, begging for pictures, as well as other interviewers waiting outside.
You follow him out the building and mentally prepare yourself for the screens and flashing lights of cameras. Next to you, Glen holds your hand tightly—not only making sure you’re next to him, but also safe. Glen hands you off to his mom who’s waiting behind him before walking up to some fans.
You smile at Cyndy. “I don’t know how you do it all the time. It’s so loud.”
She laughs. “Yeah I don’t know either. But to see how happy he gets when they all flock to him is the highlight of it all.”
You smile. You knew exactly what that feeling was like. Seeing Glen in his element and interacting with the people that got him to where he is now, felt amazing to watch.
———
You both follow him down the line of people, chatting to each other until you hear someone to the left say something that makes your blood turn cold.
“Yeah, I don’t see what he sees in her,” a teenage girl says to her friend. “She must be searching for money or something because there’s no way Glen would be with someone so ordinary like her. She’s not even that pretty.”
“Yeah, I agree. She seems like such a golddigger. Like where did she even come from?” Her friend responds.
You stop in your tracks at that, Cyndy’s brows furrow in their direction and she wraps an arm around your waist.
“Don’t listen to them. That’s just jealousy talking,” she whispers in your ear.
You only nod, scared if you spoke, you’d cry. Instead, you and Cyndy walk toward the car that’s meant to drive you all back to Glen’s house and wait for Glen there.
By the time he joins you all, you’re barely speaking and holding it together. On the car ride back to his place, you text your charge nurse, Kathy, and ask her to put you in the schedule for the whole week.
Kathy: are you sure? That’s a lot of hours and you’ll be exhausted by the end of it all.
You: trust me, I need the distraction and the money. I’ll be fine.
Kathy: alright, you’re set up for the whole week.
You sigh to yourself, earning a light nudge and smile from Glen.
“Are you okay?” He asks.
You smile up at him and lean onto his shoulder. “Yeah, just got a text that I’ll be working all week.”
“Oh no,” he says. “Can you find a replacement?
“Unfortunately no,” you tell him. “We’ve been so short staffed, they’d barely let me leave for lunch.”
“Hopefully all that overtime means you can come with me to London next week.”
You only smile and nod.
The thing about dating Glen that you never got used to was the way that he’d pay for everything you two did. You knew there was an imbalance when it came to money but never brought it up because he’d always been so happy to pay for everything. But after hearing what those two girls were saying…. Your pride, or something like it, felt like it was wrong to let it continue to happen.
You didn’t want to seem like a gold digger after all.
With this week of twelve hour shifts, you’d be able to afford the ticket, maybe some souvenirs?
Maybe I should text Kathy to set me up for sixteen hour shifts all week.
You text her when you get back to Glen’s place.
———
By the time Wednesday rolls around, you know asking for a week of work plus adding four more hours to your shifts was a mistake.
Glen tried to stay up and wait for you, but he’d be fast asleep in bed by the time you got out of the shower.
On top of not being able to really see him, you yourself were exhausted. Your body becoming so tired, even sitting down was hard because you’d fall asleep. So instead of sitting down during your shift, you’d stand.
At the end of your shift on Wednesday, you could barely keep your eyes open on the drive back home. And when you did get home, you didn’t even bother getting out of your scrubs before collapsing onto the couch and falling asleep.
“This is normal, mom,” you hear Glen say faintly. “She’s working herself to death and I’m just…I’m worried for her.”
The next morning, you rub your eyes when your alarm blares in your ear. Sitting up from the couch, you race to the shower, peeling off your scrubs from the night before, and quickly showering to wake yourself up.
When you step out of the bathroom, you find Glen standing there with a cup of coffee ready for you.
“Good morning, baby,” he says, kissing you.
“Did I wake you?” You ask, taking the cup and sipping.
“No, I’ve been waking up early to make sure you get everything you need for work,” he tells you.
“Thank you,” you smile. You look down at your watch and sigh. “I have to get going.”
“I packed you lunch and extra clothes so that you don’t have to shower when you get home. Maybe you’ll sleep in the bed tonight?” His eyes are hopeful and you can’t help but feel so bad.
He’s doing all of this for you and yet you’re trying to avoid him—to an extent.
“I’ll try to,” you tell him. “I’ve just been so tired to walk up the stairs.”
“Then I’ll set something up for us before you get home,” he tells you. He kisses you before adding, “I’ll see you later.”
———
You’re halfway into your shift when you get the trauma of the day, maybe even the year.
You’re running, trying to grab the necessary supplies you need for the CPR that’s on its way when you suddenly feel the world begin to spin out from under you.
One second you’re stuffing you pockets with extra flushes and vials for bloodwork, the next your vision is blurring and going black.
When you finally wake up, you’re at the hospital still but in a room. The beeping of the monitor next to you grounds you in reality enough look around the room. Glen sits in a chair on the other side of you, worry and fear painted all over his face.
“Glen?” You croak.
“Oh my god,” he says, turning you and grabbing your hand. “Are you feeling okay?”
“For the most part,” you mumble. “What happened?”
“Kathy told me you fainted from exhaustion,” he tells you. “You shouldn’t have been working so many hours so close together. You could’ve gotten seriously hurt. You’re lucky someone was there to break your fall.”
He sighs, running his hand through his hair before asking, “What were you thinking working so many hours for so long?”
“I don’t know,” you lie.
“Yes you do. Tell me,” he urges.
You sigh, rubbing your eyes before looking at him. “I can’t afford to go to London.”
“I’ll pay for your ticket,” he quickly says.
“Glen, I don’t want you to.” This was going to be hard. “I want to pay for myself.”
“I don’t mind doing it, baby.” He searches your face before adding, “There’s more, isn’t there?”
“Yes,” you answer. You squeeze your eyes shut before opening them and taking his hand in yours again. “I don’t want you to think I’m a gold digger.”
“Why would I think that?”
“Because you pay for everything!” You exclaim. “I don’t think it’s fair that you spend money on me and I can’t do the same for you.”
Glen smiles at you, kissing the inside of your wrist. “Y/N, there’s nothing that makes me happier than paying for everything. If I get to spoil you by taking you to London or paying for our dinners and rent, then that means I’m doing my job. I never want you to feel like you’re freeloading or being a gold digger around me.”
He tilts your head back to face him completely before continuing. “Baby don’t ever feel like that’s what you are because you’re not. I’m so grateful to do it for you. In fact, I love doing it.”
“Are you sure?” You ask.
“Very,” he tells you. “So you can stop with the extra shifts. I already talked to Kathy about giving the rest of the week off.”
Tears prick your eyes as you pull him in for a kiss.
“I love you so much.”
“And I love you more,” Glen says. “But don’t do that again. Please?”
You laugh. “I promise I won’t.”
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thementalshawty · 2 days
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Short PAC What ‘Era’ Of Your Life You’re In Right Now 😘
Haylowwwww my babies, you seen not only did I post a YouTube video which I know I finally got to do it’ll be at the bottom of this so look at that two readings in one, 😂! This is a reading I felt pulled to do for you guys really quick I felt like mistress Isabelle brooks from drag race feeling myself entering a new era and I wanted to spread that with you guys so choose from these iconic ladies who had and created so many eras and figure out just where you are in your life right now.
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Pile 1
Your Card: The Twins
I’m seeing that you’re in your yin yang individual era right now, your glow up era I’m hearing that for your pile 1 glow up, your aura is vibrating high and you wanna protect yourself, you’re learning all aspects of yourself and you’re doing it in a safe haven or you’re attempting to get into a safe zone so you can explore the dual sides and natures of you! You’re judging yourself and holding yourself up to a standard that may not be you, comparing yourselves with your siblings maybe? Also if you’re in a relationship that is tense right it could be because of some trauma that THE BOTH OF YOU, need to deal with in order for your relationship to be harmonious. You’re your compassionate era “I see you twin.” I heard that, that maybe for some of you, idk, but I see you giving the benefit of the doubt more, being more caring and thoughtful to the other person, ending old habits and cycles that have been stopping you from having a loving relationship. This era you’re in is all about healing, balance, compassion, and reconnection! Glow up Era fashooooo!
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Pile 2
Your Card: The Patron.
Well to put it just like that, you’re in your patron era, your guiding hand era, mentorship era. You’re definitely the voice and mind someone needs right now in order to get through this thing called life, I’m feeling like it could be you being the mentor or you gaining one. I’m also seeing that you’re in your either endorsement deals era or sponsoring the world era, you’re either giving or receiving some kind of financial investment and I’m seeing that this is new project era vibes as well hunty! I’m hearing what ever you but to do you gon eat it up HENNYYYYYYYYYYYY! I’m living for this era that you are entering you’re in your empowerment era and not just for you but for this new person coming into your life, be open minded, they may not be romantic but this connection is important for the both of you whether you’re receiving or giving the guidance. Learning era baby!!!
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Pile 3
Your Card: The Astronomer
So baddies lol, I see that you here are getting more into your taboo era. I’m seeing that you guys will be discovering a lot about yourselves spiritually, you may even connect closely with your higher self, through dreams for some of you. Connecting with the stars is really important for you at this point, you may even be learning more about your astrology charts and shit right now, stars are aligning for you baby and you’re gonna find out why! Whatever shit you’re dealing with too at this point you’re in you’re gaze in to the future era cos the solution is not in the past, it’s in the future and you need to look there because I’m seeing what you doing right now to solve it ain’t working, time for new ideas. Be open to new suggestions to follow them like is gospel trust YOURSELF! If you’re feeling what someone is saying is not right trust me it ain’t! You are in your high priestess/hierophant era babies do not allow anyone to make you feel like you can’t trust yourself! Your gut is leading you right my babies this era that you’re entering is a whole new you! A glow up but this involves only you, as the other likes involved other people. You got this babies!
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That’s all that I’m getting for you guys, let me know if you like these eras reading in the comments and I will try to do them periodically.
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signanothername · 2 hours
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penny for your thoughts on dadmare and more fandom takes??
🪙
Tbh Anon you have to be a bit more specific with what fandom takes you want my opinion on cause I genuinely can’t think of any shshhshshs
But for dadmare… hmmmmmmm
It’s… I have complicated feelings about this trope
Like on one hand, I love the exploration of dadmare as a concept and would genuinely love for it to be explored in a deep meaningful way
On the other hand… the fandom never actually explores it in a deep meaningful way so everytime I come across dadmare a part of me dies inside
Like the fandom immediately settles for “tired generic dad trying to control his rowdy kids” and i’m here like :’)
Like i’d love for dadmare to actually be explored in depth, like the shift for Nightmare from being a bitch to being “dadmare” how does Nightmare deal with MTT in a dadmare way while staying true to his character
How did Nightmare develop and change and how does he feel about being “dadmare”, does he struggle to face the consequences of the abuse he put MTT through and how does he make it up to them? but like also for the love of god you can explore this trope without having MTT act like children, they’re literally +30 old men and you don’t have to infantilize them for the trope to work
Also hot take but everytime MTT call Nightmare “dad” unironically an angel loses its wings, it just ruins the vibes for me, like dadmare is a trope yet people genuinely take it too literally, which again just plays into the infantilization of adult characters
Hell, relationships aren’t one sided, how does MTT feel about Nightmare’s shift, do they trust him or do they take it as an opportunity to escape, do they hate Nightmare but warm up to him or do they not care for his change of heart
Like here’s an example, when people write dadmare, they write his ability to absorb MTT’s negativity to relieve them of their pain right? Ok cool, I LOVE THAT! What I hate tho is the fact every single person in the gang seems to “trust” Nightmare with their life and how all of them react the same way
Basically the MTT are reduced to cardboard cutouts that are literally just duplicates of each other, they all have the exact same reaction to anything Nightmare does, like you’re actually gonna sit here and tell me that Killer trusts Nightmare with his soul????? What did Nightmare do to earn that trust, and Killer isn’t a trusting person to begin with
Hell what did Nightmare do in the first place? Even when the interpretation of Nightmare is that he’s kind from the beginning and that he “saved them”, do you honestly believe that Murder would genuinely feel saved? Are you gonna tell me Horror is gonna stay and live with Nightmare by his own volition and abandon his brother where he only goes back to “visit” him? Since when has Nightmare become more important to Horror than Papyrus?
Hell since when can Murder, Killer and Horror communicate well?? Since when were they super close to each other and since when was Murder ok with Killer’s existence considering his very dangerous Determination and Chara-like nature?
Since when was Killer super emotional in stage 2 and since when was his other stages completely forgotten to fit the perfectly happy and healthy family that the fandom is trying to force onto these obviously unhealthy characters with unhealthy relationships and destructive behaviors
Like don’t get me wrong, people are obviously allowed to explore their fave characters however they like, but my point is, I can’t enjoy the trope of Dadmare even tho i want to, cause the fandom just settles for very straight forward answers to every problem, every little problem is immediately resolved with a snap of a finger
Everything is happy and rainbows and roses and any problems the MTT have they just go to dadmare and suddenly they’re no longer self destructive cause dadmare immediately saves them cause he always has the answer!!!
And i’m here still waiting for an interpretation of dadmare that actually pulls me in and actually interests me like
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moghedien · 1 day
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Shadowheart navigating being a cleric of Selune post game has to be like…the funniest thing to behold
Because she has a few options:
1) just don’t ever do any cleric stuff outside of her little farmhouse cottage and don’t worry about it
2) do cleric stuff but lie and pretend that she definitely knows what she’s doing and wasn’t a Sharran like a week ago
3) do cleric stuff and be honest about being a Sharran a week ago
And like any of those options are potentially hilarious l because if she like actually pursues doing Selunite cleric stuff, she has basically no history and is just popping up out of no where. The cleric and paladin that converted her have been dead/presumed dead for a century. They have no current religious community (the last one they had was forcibly converted to Shar and destroyed) and might actually have reasons to not want to get immediately caught up in one. The likelihood that they would be able to point Shadowheart at any kind of like help or resources is slim as they’d probably be fumbling in the dark with only slightly more context than her about the current state of Selunites
Like literally the only thing that would make any of this easier for them is that Aylin is literally Selune’s daughter and can probably prove that though she seemed to have some issues she needed to discuss with her mommy at the end of her questline so maybe not, and all of that is even assuming Shadowheart goes to Isobel and Aylin for help/direction
So you potentially have Shadowheart stumbling her way into congregations either like “hello fellow Selunites. I too love the moonwitch I mean moonmaiden” or you have her being like “hello I used to follow Shar but I failed at becoming a dark justiciar and now I’m going to follow Selune look I dyed my hair and everything”
Like either she tries to not bring up Shar and pretend she converted randomly or some other way and it immediately becomes clear that she somehow converted and became a cleric knowing very little about Selune and Selunite rituals/practices yet has a lot of preconceived ideas about Selune that are probably wildly wrong even when she’s trying not to be hostile to Selune anymore, and thus immediately becomes suspicious
Or she’s honest about being formerly Sharran and immediately seems suspicious and off because of that as she has to try to explain her life story that she does not remember and how she converted because she met a hot buff lesbian tied up in a magic circle who was a real demigod and it’s not weird that she converted on the spot, she swears! Anyway can someone teach her like the basic beliefs of being a Selunite? The buff lesbian wouldn’t stop fucking her wife long enough to teach her.
But then the more likely option of her just not even trying to deal with the clericy activities of being a cleric and she just minds her own business collecting baby animals and taking care of her family. Which is like a slow burn in its humor potential because presumably she’s not gonna live in the literally middle of no where and there will eventually be neighbors and some kind of community she’s part of, and she’s just becomes known as the nice little half elf girl who loves animals and just takes care of her aging parents, who are devoted Selunites. And her having healing abilities would probably come up, because that’s a useful skill to have, especially in a small community, and healing magic plus Selunite parents would eventually cause people to put two and two together even if she didn’t advertise it. And you know that would lead to more questions about why she doesn’t advertise it and why she doesn’t do any Selunite practices for the community and you know she actually doesn’t seem to know a lot of stuff that other clerics of Selune do/teach, why would that be when she’s clearly a powerful cleric and has a devote family. And also what’s up with that big ass wound on her hand that’s flaring up all the time? Also it’s all very suspicious especially since they all just came from no where one day.
And you know that eventually it would lead to a point where Shadowheart and/or her dad would have to just be like “ok so what happened was…”
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thedemonsurfer · 3 days
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Back on my bullshit with trying to guess character motives feat. Dark Sun
Sooo Dark Sun (or 'Just Sun') finally rolled up to talk to Sun in todays SAMS ep, and naturally I'm putting him on the high-speed cycle in my head trying to parse what his motives are. What does he GET out of this?
Because he was leaning on Sun really hard to kill Nexus-- specifically, he wants Sun to see Nexus as a representative of the worst kind of person Moon can be, and to recognize that as a threat that needs to be killed.
But-- why?
Roll back a bit: Dark Sun has been involved in every step of Nexus' fall from grace.
He did something to New Moon at their very first meeting.
He provided Eclipse with the means to bring back Solar, and then prevented him from acting until Dark Sun wanted him to.
He dropped Ruin off on New Moon's doorstep when Moon was at a point where he could have accepted Solar's death, causing Moon to double down on his efforts.
He plucked New Moon out of space and pulled the chip containing Old Moon out of his head and left it for Monty to find.
He's provided Nexus with a new base of operations and enables his monkeying around with dark energon dark star energy, despite the damage it's doing to Nex.
Dark Sun needs Nexus to make himself into a threat. Because that's what he does, he sets up the dominoes and pulls the strings, but he doesn't outright tell others what to do (unless it's bossing Ruin around, but Ruin is his bitch so he doesn't count.)
And today, he was leaning real hard on Sun to see Nexus as a threat. to see all Moons as a threat (though, curiously, not mentioning Old Moon).
So what is he getting out of this? Why does he also need Sun to see Nexus as a threat that needs to be stopped? Why does he want Sun to 'understand' that he has to kill his brother?
Dial back the motives. The most compelling and strongest motives are Simple and Selfish: Eclipse didn't actually want power, he wanted Moon to pay attention to him. Ruin did want to prevent a total catastrophe, but he also wanted revenge on the Creators for destroying his life and world.
(As an aside, this is why I feel that Bloodmoon didn't make a good antagonist, and why Ruin's initial appearance was kind of boring. 'I'm here just to fuck shit up' isn't a very compelling motive.)
What do we know about Dark Sun?
He lied about having killed his Moon and actually kept him to torture-- or he DID kill his own Moon, and the one Ruin met was a substitute
He never gets his hands dirty, he gets others to act for him
He's obsessed with Sun
He fucking hates Moon
Dark Sun tells Sun that 98% of dimensions lose their Sun, and Moon is often the one that kills them. But it's not exactly that straightforward, is it?
Atlas points out that Dark Sun is counting dimensions where Sun was reset as him being 'dead'. Dimensions where Eclipse has a hand in Sun's death could be considered Moon's fault, since Eclipse is a byproduct of the killcode. Ruin's situation resulted in the ego death of both his Sun and Moon, on his Moon's suggestion. Ruin also wiped out 5000 dimensions and I think that's gonna skew some of the numbers.
And... how many dimensions have we seen a dead Sun in the show? Two, I think? The one where they never split up and Moon consumed Sun after the killcode took full control, and Solar's. And in Solar's, that Moon went mad trying to bring his Sun back.
Almost every instance we've seen, Sun and Moon coexist just fine once they're in separate bodies.
And I think that's what Dark Sun wants. I think he's trying to justify killing his own Moon before they ever got a chance to get along.
Moons MUST be evil and unable to change, they MUST be cruel. It's impossible for a Sun to get along with a Moon for any length of time, and that Sun is in the right when he has to kill his Moon.
And he's going to use Sun and Nexus to prove how right he is.
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