#and if my father has anything else to say abt how he thinks they look bad and generic and whatever else he can kiss my fucking ass

[kentopedia]

my girl dad dazai post but now i’m thinking abt pm boss dazai as a dad …

he knows the mafia is no place for a child, but then you get pregnant, and he realizes just how badly he does wants to be a dad (even if he thinks he’ll bad at it)

he swears to himself he’ll protect her from all the bad things in the world, but it’s not just him … she’s got everyone in the port mafia wrapped around her little finger. so dazai feels a little better, knowing he’s got a handful of the most powerful ability users looking out for her <3

and she can get away with anythinggg. there is a lot of “just don’t tell your mom” happening (from dazai & everyone else). she loves that everyone has a special ability, but chuuya’s is her favorite bc he can float anything ! and she is dazai’s child so don’t doubt she is a menace !! if chuuya won’t fly her in the air, she’ll start tearing up bc she knowssss it makes him feel bad >:)

dazai has a lot going on with the port mafia, but nothing is more important than you and his daughter. he puts everything aside for the two of you !! the most devoted husband and father

dazai stops, mid sentence, looking up at the sound of the door slamming shut, little footsteps sprinting across the room. he’s in the meeting room with the execs, discussing the foreseeable future of the mafia.

“daddy! daddy!” she shouts, running with something waving wildly in her hand. you’re two steps behind, her but she’s far too quick, too excited about her newest creation to stop. “look what i made!”

and though dazai is in the middle of an important meeting, his entire body language changes, and he’s turning towards the little girl, a big smile on his face. “what did you make today, cutie?” he asks, picking her up to pull into his lap.

“mommy showed me how to paint!” she shoves the canvas into his hand, a proud grin on her face as dazai brushes away her tangled hair. “look! it’s all of us!” she says, but her l’s still sound a little like w’s, and dazai can’t help but marvel at the fact that this sweet little girl has been raised by him.

she points to herself, a stick figure with an odd-shaped head, and nothing more than two lines of dark hair. “that’s me! and there’s you and mommy!” there’s a heart painted between your heads, and it makes dazai melt, the fact that even your daughter can see all the love you have for each other.

he wants to kiss you so badly, overwhelmed by affection for the two most important people in his life.

but then his little girl is pointing to a chaotic block of red and black, painted in splatters in the corner of the canvas. “and there’s uncle chuuya!”

dazai stares at it, blinks, then bursts into a fit of laughter that has his stomach aching. there’s a little hat on top of the mess of paint, and it sends dazai into another spiral.

“let me see that!” chuuya says, grumbling as he snatches the canvas out of dazai’s hand.

“what?” your daughter asks, frowning as she pokes her dad in the face, trying to get him to stop his laughter. “is it bad, uncle chuu?”

and chuuya, who previously had a grumpy expression, softens, not wanting to break the poor girl’s heart. “no, it’s real good,” he promises, even if he’s a bit offended by the portrayal, when she made her own family look so sweet. “it looks just like me!”

dazai chokes, but finally stops laughing to himself when you flick the back of his head.

“yay!” your daughter says, throwing her arms up high, grinning at chuuya’s praise. she’s so adorable that dazai has half a mind to squeeze her tight and never let her go. “see, mommy i told you they’d like it!”

you sigh, and take her from dazai’s arms. “you were supposed to show them after the meeting.” she’s still making grabby hands at her dad as you hold her, a pout forming while she squirms in your arms, trying to escape. “sorry, ‘samu. i know you’re busy today.”

dazai leans up, standing halfway out of his chair to kiss the frown off your face. “don’t apologize, darling.” he caresses your cheek softly, before looking back at his daughter, who just wants to be nosy and listen in to the adult conversations. “i always have time for my two favorite girls.”

you smile, softening as dazai ruffles his daughter’s hair.

“i want to stay here with you!” the little girl says, and dazai laughs, closing up her fists with his palm gently as she tries to climb onto him.

“i’ll be done in just a little bit, sweetie. then, how about we have a tea party? i’ll go get you some ice cream too! but you have to listen to your mom until then, okay?”

“i’ll listen, i promise!” she squeals in excitement, and then sobers, leaning back into your arms with a serious expression. “can you bring a special guest again? maybe akutagawa this time? he hasn’t been to a tea party yet!”

dazai’s lip twitches, but he doesn’t let the smile break free. still, the mere thought of akutagawa pouring tea for his daughter is enough to have him complying with her wishes. “sure, honey. i think i can arrange that.”

[amourtoken]

so I literally cannot stop thinking abt this here u go

god kink Noah and softie Christian reader

I already know I'm going to hell so no need to remind me ik this is filth but that's what's fun abt it also basing the looks of the building off of this big ass church I used to go to and it's very weird and industrial so apologies if it's confusing

*NSFW below the cut, MDNI*

cw: sacrilege lmao, degradation, raw sex, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, Noah kinda thinks he's better than everyone else, maybe bc he thinks he's God idk, corruption, loss of virginity, experienced Noah, dirty talk, slightly public, belly bulge, dacryphilia

♡ Noah's only at church cause he has to be, otherwise why the fuck would he waste his morning here. He sits through the awful music and wonders how all of these people live such a lie, its pathetic to him. The only thing that makes it bearable is the pretty little thing in the little white sundress that never fails to show up every Sunday.

♡ he thinks you're so cute. Brainwashed, but cute. All he ever thinks abt is how he could desecrate you and how you'd look so much prettier worshipping him.

♡ Noah is damn near your exact opposite, covered in tattoos, always wearing dark colors. He never really talks to anyone either, keeping to himself. You'd say he was miserable if you didn't see his face soften a little every time you catch his eye. You try to make a point and interact with him every chance you get, maybe he's lonely? You can't let that happen. He's the worship leader's son, you'd think he'd be having a better time but who knows what's going through his head.

♡ Noah almost feels bad that he can't keep his thoughts in order when you walk up to him, pretty smile plastered on your face. You're chattering about today's service and he's picturing his hands on your hips, fingers digging into the soft skin while he bucks up into you and gets to hear those pretty little noises he's sure you'd make. All he'd have to do is pull your dress up too, it'd be easy. He's nodding along with your conversation and trying to seem interested but it's getting harder and harder to pretend he's listening.

♡ his eyes drifting to the neckline of your dress which is pretty modest but God he'd be able to pull it down so easy, tease your nipples while you grind yourself on his thigh and whine for him to fill you up. His eyes snap back to your face which is etched with concern.

"Noah, are you feeling alright? You seem out of it."

♡ he could lie, but what's the point. Isn't lying a sin?

"I'm fine. Just thinking about how pretty you'd look split on my cock."

♡ did he really say that??? You weren't sure how to even respond. Or if you should at all. You were flushed down to your chest and Noah admired the pretty pink tinge to your skin. He was almost nervous he'd fucked up but he knew what to say to have you following him like a little sheep. If you can sit through service every week and genuinely believe the shit his father is saying, you'll do anything if it's said in the right tone.

"Bet you've never even fucked before, have you? Saving yourself for marriage and all that bullshit. You know I could make you feel good, you should let me show you."

♡ you're still stunned, standing like a little deer in some headlights. You'd be lying if you said you didn't find Noah attractive but you felt like he wasn't in the cards for you. He's everything you're not, but maybe that's what's so enticing about him. How he talked about your beliefs stung a little but you couldn't help the way your thighs pressed together at the thought of him and his suggestion. He'd never hurt you, right? You can trust him, why would he wrong you?

♡ Noah nodded toward one of the exit doors, turning to leave and hoping you'd follow. You nearly tripped over your own feet trying to catch up with him. Your brain felt fuzzy and you knew whatever he was gonna put you through was horrifically sinful but you can be forgiven for being curious, right? Noah locked the door behind you, leaving you both in an empty stairwell. Hopefully no one tried to interrupt the two of you, because Noah was immediately to work. He walked you backwards until your back was pressed to the concrete wall and he tangled his fingers in your hair, pulling until you whimpered and keened against his hand for some relief.

"The only fucking God in this building is me. I expect you to treat me like such."

"You answer to me, and you follow my fucking directions, yeah? Gonna be a good girl and do what I say?"

♡ you felt your heart race terribly in your chest from how close he was, you felt like a prey animal being stalked by a predator. You really didn't know what to expect, you've never done this before. You shouldn't be doing this at all...what have you gotten yourself into...

♡ Noah surprisingly sinks to his knees in front of you, hands brushing at your knees and sliding up your thighs, hiking up your dress as he goes. His long fingers hooked under the waistband of your panties to tug them down and he threw one of your legs over his shoulder, without warning burying his face in your pussy making you yelp and tangle your fingers in his hair for some balance.

(Something like this yk)

♡ you pulled his hair tightly between your fingers, whining while he lapped at your pussy and groaned against you when you pulled a little too hard. You felt pricks of pins and needles all over your body, it felt like a swarm of butterflies populated your lower stomach. Oh god...one of his hands steadied itself on your thigh but the other slid up to glide between your folds, gathering the slick mess before prodding at your entrance making you squirm. He was right, you hadn't done this before. He wanted you to enjoy yourself though, that's why he was taking the time to stretch you out and make you cum, so you could actually take his cock afterwards.

♡ the fingers at your entrance slid in slowly, stretching you out and scissoring slightly to spread you further. Your legs were shaking and the swarm in your belly felt 100x worse. You were worried you couldn't hold yourself up much longer...Noah pressed his fingers as deep as he could fit them, brushing your cervix and curving up to press right into the most sensitive spot he could. He laughed against your pussy when he felt you clench around his fingers, teeth brushing your clit and making you whimper pathetically above him. He was the one on his knees and you were unraveling. Pitiful.

"You gonna cum for me? Can't let you take this cock till you cum, won't fit."

♡ when he nudges a 3rd finger in you completely come undone, tugging his face closer to you and nearly crying while you grind into him through your orgasm. He speeds his fingers up inside of you until you're squirming and begging him to stop. He withdraws and stands back up, reminding you he towers over you at his full height and he licks your slick off of his fingers right in front of you. You're still panting and your legs feel shaky, this isn't helping.

♡ Noah thinks you look adorable so shaken up, he can't help but admire how your chest is rising so quickly and your face is flushed. He did that to you. He's gonna do so much more too. He backs you into the wall again and runs his hands down your thighs, picking you up and pressing your back into the wall for extra support while your legs wrapped around his waist. You threw your arms around his neck to steady yourself but he wasn't gonna drop you, he could hold you up for hours if he needed to. Again though, he thinks you're adorable and lets you think he could drop you just to get your heart racing again.

♡ he holds you up with one arm while freeing his achingly hard cock with the other. You didn't even really get a chance to see it, but when he drug the tip through the slick mess between your legs you could describe the feeling as dread. He felt huge. Noah leaned his head against your neck, pressing soft kisses up to your ear and nipping at the soft skin.

"Gotta relax for me, promise I'll make you feel so good...trust me"

"Can't wait to feel how tight this pussy is, can't believe I'm your first. Bet I'll be the last too."

"Gonna fucking ruin you for everyone else, gonna be mine forever, yeah?"

"So much for staying pure, hm? All it took was one little comment and here you are letting me fuck you raw in a stairwell. Wonder how your god feels about that."

♡ he'd planned on taking it slow but after sinking in just a few inches he couldn't help himself. He trusted up into you, hilting himself in one move and sank his teeth deep into your shoulder to try and muffle the groan that escaped his chest. He slapped a hand over your mouth as he sank in and thank God he did because the sound you made was nothing short of a scream. Big tears welled in your eyes even after all the work he did to prep you, the stretch of taking his cock felt almost too much. Noah was loving every moment, watching you fall apart for him. He pressed a large hand to your stomach as he started fucking himself into you just to feel how deep he fit in your poor body.

"O-oh god-"

"The only fucking god you should be praying to is me."

♡ your whimpers and moans were nonstop but thankfully muffled against his palm, he didn't want anyone interrupting you. You gripped his cock just fucking right and he doubted he could really last long but he needed to have you unravel on his dick before he could finish. Noah reached up and tugged the front of your dress down, leaning to absolutely cover your chest in hickeys and lick at your overly sensitive nipples, your whines pitched up when his teeth got a little too rough but he couldn't help but admire his work. Your pretty soft skin marred with teeth marks and bruises. There's no way you could walk back out there and have no one notice, everyone would know exactly what you did, and who you did it with. Perfect.

"bet you've been thinking about this just as much as I have, huh bunny? Needed to get fucked, needed to get filled up by some fat cock, yeah? Tell me."

"Your little god was keeping you from this, does he really feel better than me? Wanna hear you say it."

"Gonna cum again for me, bunny? Need to feel you squeeze this cock, you can do it. I got you."

♡ your head fell back against the hard wall as he fucked into you, the coil in your stomach tightened unbearably. Every thrust sank as deep as he could possibly get and made your legs shake in his hold. Noah was chasing your pleasure as much as his own, he loved seeing your pretty little pathetic expressions. He slid a hand between your bodies and barely even had a chance to brush your clit as you came. His arm around you tightened to keep you still as he fucked you through it, tears spilling from your eyes and ruining your pretty makeup.

"S-shit- that's it- good girl, feels good yeah? So good for me-"

"That's it, tell me who's making you feel this good baby say my fuckin' name- n-need to hear it"

♡ his thrusts picked up in intensity, fingers sinking into your hips hard enough to leave Bruises and he sank in impossibly deep as he shuddered through his own end, you whined at the feeling of his hot cum filling you up and the extra dripping out of you making a mess on the floor under you. It took a second for Noah to set you back down on shaky legs, he helped you straighten your dress back out before pulling you in for an uncharacteristically gentle kiss. He felt like he was a little harsh on you but he was happy you actually would do something like this with him finally.

"So pretty...we should do this again sometime, yeah?"

[angelsdean]

All these thoughts also prompted me to think abt what John and Mary's fights were often about, especially the fight where John leaves and Dean then comforts Mary. And I think a big part of it was Mary keeping secrets and sneaking around with regard to hunting.

We know she was still hunting in 1980, when she saves Asa Fox. Dean would've been a year old and the hunt is not local, it's up in Canada. Mary says she's been tracking this werewolf for a long time and that they have history. I do think when she says "a long time" she means years and that she hasn't actively been tracking it but it's been something on the back-burner that she's kept an eye on all these years. But that still means she left for a number of days at the very least, and I wonder what she told John. What excuse did she come up with to justify suddenly taking off when they have a baby at home. And no, I don't think she needed to be there as "the mom" to take care of Dean or that she can't spend time away from the home or that fathers are incapable of taking care of their children or anything like that. But I think John would certainly wonder what's taking her away from them so suddenly. What could possibly be so important. And with a hunt like this, I don't think she could've exactly given him a set time-frame for her return.

Now, imagine that happening multiple times. Imagine that happening again when Sam is just a few months old. She says she has to go visit her uncle who's poorly (father of the Campbell cousins. The uncle that paid for her headstone when she died). And then she's gone for longer than she anticipated. And John is just suspicious. And when she comes back they argue about it. "I know you're lying! Just tell me the truth, Mary! What, are you seeing someone else?" And Mary holding firm to her lies because her family cannot know about the supernatural and hunting. Because she doesn't want her kids growing up like she did. Because John is her suburban fairytale. He can't know. And then John snaps. He's pissed. He thinks she's cheating while he's working to provide for the family AND watching the kids in her absence. So he flings a "Is Sam even mine?" at her in his rage and she slaps him and tells him "Don't you dare" and then John storms out in a huff but then calls later to talk about it more and Mary shuts him down. "No, John. … We’re not having this conversation again... Think about what? … You’ve two boys at home. …"

I can imagine a version of this phone call going something like this:

John calls. Maybe apologizes for what he said, but mostly just wants her to be honest with him.

John: Please, Mary, can we just talk about this.

Mary: No, John.

John: I just want you to tell me the truth! What are you hiding? What's going on that you can't tell me?

Mary: We're not having this conversation again.

John: Oh okay, 'we're not having this conversation again.' Well then can you blame me for where my mind is going? What would you think, huh?

Mary: Think about what?

John: You know how it looks, Mary. And I just, I can't keep doing this--

Mary: You have two boys at home. (and ohh the delicious irony of that in the context of her being the one leaving to continue hunting in secret)

John, probably, since the convo seems to continue: Oh that is rich coming from you right now, Mary.

Anyways, this is only one of many many scenarios I can imagine of their fights. And it's perhaps a little too sympathetic to John, but! I enjoy thinking of John complexly, especially considering how Young John is presented in SPN, and also John in the opening scene of the Pilot seems like the easy-going family man, who definitely had underlying issues prior to Mary's death (thank you SPNWIN for confirming that) but clearly those issues got worse after Mary's death, and for the most part he wasn't yet the guy we see him become after he is transformed by grief and anger. Also s12 Mary's rose-tinted recollections of John being such a good father, which starkly contrast to Dean's later memories of John, I think it's not a huge leap to say John pre-Mary's death was a good father, and I think seeing Mary leave them (likely repeatedly) under secretive circumstances for days at a time would have bothered John back then and been a continuous point of contention in their marriage.

And again, this is all simply one angle of interpretation, theorizing, and headcanoning and by no means the only possible scenario.

[venus-maneater]

a loyal dog’s reward. | yan! criston cole

soft yandere / obsessed au

fem! targaryen princess reader

synopsis. the knight’s death wasn’t convenient, but at least now you knew the lengths Ser Criston was willing to go for you.

part ii.

note; this is an au where rhaenyra/criston never happened ! he is reader’s sworn shield. reader is written with targaryen features and is kind of a sick and twisted brat (we stan). ALL CONTENT ON MY BLOG IS FICTIONAL.

WARNING(s): possessive/obsessive tendencies, violence, minor character death, unhealthy relationship dynamics, manipulation, age gap (reader is 19, criston is around 27), references to size difference, reader knows abt his tendencies and takes advantage of them, nsfw content but not full smut, allusions/references to sex, subby criston cole, dom-ish reader, praise-kink??, breeding kink??, mocking, usage of “dog”

“I know how you think of me.”

Do you really? Do you know how much he thinks of you, how he craves you? How he wants nothing more than to steal you away so no one else can ever see you again except him? He wants you to be his, only his. That’s all he wants.

“You can’t get me out of your head, can you, Ser Criston?”

He knows you emphasized his title on purpose; he was a member of the Kingsguard lusting after the Princess, and yet he couldn’t feel any guilt from behind the overwhelming desire he has for you. It’s not just lust, it’s so much more than lust. He wants you; mind, body, and soul. He wants you to look at him the way he looks at you. He wants to grow old with you and fill you up with babies. Babies that will have his dark hair and your violet eyes, or maybe even the opposite.

“You would do anything for me?”

Yes, gods yes he would. Ask for anything and its yours. Please, please, please ask something of him.

You’d noticed his peculiar behavior months ago, but you suppose it hadn’t gone far enough for you to say anything about it until now. You noticed how his eyes never left your figure if you were in the room, how he stiffened when you stood even remotely near another man, how he followed you around like a lost puppy. It was endearing at first, but tonight he had killed someone for you. Not only that, but he did it violently and in public. In all fairness, the hedge Knight was creepy and invasive, you didn’t like him. But Criston was a member of the Kingsguard, he couldn’t go around killing people just because he wanted to.

There was a tourney to celebrate your older sister Rhaenyra’s first pregnancy. She was married to Laenor around 6 months ago, so most of the family found it pleasant that she was already pregnant. Though, you knew it wasn’t Ser Laenor who was the father (or at least you assumed it wasn’t). You were rather close with your sister and her husband; you knew well what they got up to and what they didn’t. All was well for you, you found Ser Harwin to be a lovely friend.

Although Criston Cole was your sworn shield, you insisted he enter the tourney for the entertainment. Many had entered from all over Westeros, and your shield had always succeeded in physical competitions in the past.

“I’d just like to see you win.” You told him, batting your eyes. He was quick to obey your request at that.

Ser Criston received your favor right before his first round, and won the tournament just as you knew he would. A hedge knight from the Reach came in second place to your shield. He seemed nice enough and was a rather good sport about losing, but frankly he was annoying. He wouldn’t stop following Criston around, which eventually lead to him introducing himself to you as Tion Gracefeld. His presence didn’t bother you at first, but you could clearly tell how much Criston hated it.

After the event ended, there was celebration all throughout King’s Landing, so there was a bit of chaos on the short journey back to the Red Keep. Tion took advantage of this, trying to get closer to you. Of course, Criston was there to push him back each time, telling him “please give the princess some space” through gritted teeth.

His jealousy was a bit cute to you, so you let Ser Tion continue with his behavior. It wasn’t such a bother, but as you approached the castle, his words became less playful and more… sexual. Foul, even.

You couldn’t remember exactly what happened for certain, the violence was too quick, but you knew that he grabbed your arm before Ser Criston murdered him for it. The Dornish Kingsguard grabbed Tion, pulling him from you and throwing him to the ground. You were sure the beating was bad, considering it was enough for him to die from his injuries, but you refused to look.

Criston was eventually pulled off the man after a couple minutes, and now here he was. Sitting on the edge of your bed in front of you, hands and armor splattered in blood.

“Look at me.” You told him. You had to give him some credit, he listens to you so well, “Why did you do it? What made you angry enough to kill him?”

You could hear his breath hitch in his throat as you stepped closer, only to stop directly in front of him.

He took in a quick breath before answering, looking up at you with frustrated eyes, “He was talking to you like- like you were some… whore. There was no respect. He was trying— to touch you. I’m your sworn protector, Princess, I was only doing my job.”

He didn’t want you to know about his sick obsession with you, trying to hide it using his position as an excuse for his behavior. Unfortunately for him, it was incredibly obvious. You could tell how angry he still was from the interaction; his hands shaking, chest heaving, and jaw clenched.

“You know,” You started, looking down into Criston’s eyes and leaning closer to his face, “I didn’t really like the guy, myself. But you’ve gotten me into quite the situation. You should be charged for your crimes, I’m afraid.”

Even seated, he was so close to your height that you didn’t have to lean down much to meet at eye-level.

“I’m sorry, my Princess” was all that left him, drunk on the lack of space between you.

“That’s all you have to say?” You whispered, your breath hitting his lips. His pupils were blown impossibly wide, making you smile. As disturbing as this whole thing was, he was almost too attractive for you to care. Almost.

“I don’t want to be taken from you.” He whispered. He didn’t care that he killed someone, he wasn’t sorry, he just didn’t want to be forced to leave you. Tion deserved his wrath; he got too close to you.

You smiled slightly, standing back up to your full height. Using your knee, you pushed the man’s legs apart so you could stand between them. Your hands moved from your sides to his chest, “You won’t. I’ll fix it for you, I truly don’t mind. My father will believe me when I tell him Ser Tion was harassing me, and that you just stepped in to defend my honor.”

Criston gulped, taking in a deep breath to surround himself in your scent. He didn’t say a word.

Your hands slowly creeped up to his shoulders, then into his hair, “Do you ever think about kissing me, Ser Criston?”

His eyelids dropped slightly, the euphoria of your hands running through his locks reaching him.

“As your Princess, you’re sworn to tell me the truth.”

“Yes.” He closed his eyes, “Please, Princess. I am soiled with blood, I don’t want it touching you.”

“No? Then perhaps you should’ve exercised more self-control.” You quipped. Deciding to make things more difficult, you climbed into his lap, your knees on either side of his thighs. There was a lot less blood on his legs than on his chest or arms, but you could still feel a bit of it seeping into the gentle fabric of your silk dress. Good thing you were wearing red.

His eyes squeezed shut even tighter. Self-control you had said. Was this a test? Did you want him to sit still? Then he would. His bloodied hands were balled up in fists beside him.

“You defend me fiercely,” You said. “kind of like a dog, don’t you think.”

It wasn’t a real question, he knew you were just mocking him for his behavior. You knew about him. You know how sick he is for you.

“My fierce dog,” You grinned, “protecting me from any man that speaks his filthy words to me.”

You were perfect, so perfect. His goddess.

“Do you want a reward for your behavior? For protecting me?” You asked. Criston was amusing to you. It was boring at court, having so many people try to flatter themselves into gaining your favor, men trying to marry you for power. But Criston Cole was different; he was genuinely dedicated to you. As a member of the Kingsguard, he had nothing to gain from being with you.

“Reward?” He rasped, his eyes fluttering open, curious. You had never look so pretty as you did in this moment; smiling at him whilst sat atop his lap.

“Yes, a reward. I can give you a kiss, if you’d accept?”

“A kiss?” He questioned, shocked at your proposal.

You giggle at him, moving close enough that your noses are touching, “Is that a ‘no’? Do you not want a kiss from your princess?”

He does. He really does. But how could he dare dishonor you by accepting? A Princess of the realm should not be kissing her guard. Your reputation would be ruined if anyone were to find out.

“Can’t.” He eventually sputtered, his forehead resting against yours.

“And why not? Do you not fantasize about it? What other fantasies do you have?”

His eyes were squeezed shut, but he could hear the smirk in your voice. “I— yes, but Princess….” He cut himself off before he finished, you must save your affections for your future husband.

He held back a snarl; he didn’t want you to have a future husband, at least not one that wasn’t him. But he was not allowed to be married and even if he were, he was not high-born like you. Your father would never approve.

“Answer me, Cole, tell me what you imagine occurring between us.” You were getting frustrated with him, this was supposed to be easy, “Look back up at me properly.”

He did as you said and more; finally letting his urges control him, he pushed his lips to yours. His hands, the blood now beginning to dry and stick, gripped at your waist tightly. You gasped into his mouth, quick to reciprocate with your hands pulling at his dark locks.

“‘Think about marrying you,” he muttered against your lips, “keeping you safe, an’ you thanking me all pretty. So pretty, you’re perfect.”

Placing your hand flat on his chest, you pull away by just an inch, “Thanking you, huh? Is that what you want?”

“‘Just want you to love me. Want you to be mine, just for me. I could— I can give you anything, just ask. We can leave here— and be together—!”

You giggled, “You’re getting too excited, Ser Criston. I’m a princess, you know.”

“There— there are places, my Love,” he let out a shocked huff as you pushed him onto his back, “in Essos, where titles do not matter.”

“Is that so?” You moved up his body before settling on his stomach, which was still covered in tainted armor. “And what would we do there? Build a farm? Have babies?”

“Yes.” A part of him could tell you were only teasing, but it was overshadowed by the part of him yearning for a life with you.

You slowly bent down, your body flush against his, and whispered into his ear, “You want to put a few babies in me?”

Not thinking, he reached up a hand and held the back of your head to keep you in place, “More than a few. They’ll inherit your beauty, my Love.”

“Mmm,” You grabbed his hand and sat back up, “your eyes and my hair?”

“Or the opposite.”

Laughing, you tilted your head back, still gripping his right hand between yours. Your laugh eventually subsided with a happy sigh, and you looked back at him. You had so much power over the big man laying happily beneath you, it was funny. He was staring at you obediently, waiting for you to say or do something. Slowly, you slid the black glove off his fingers and pulled his hand up to your lips. He watched as you placed soft kiss to each of his bruised knuckles. His hand was so large beside your features.

“I’m quite fond of you. What should I do if my father refuses to see reason and executes you for your crimes?” It wouldn’t happen, you both knew. But he was happy to entertain your questions, just so long as you were talking to him and touching him.

“I would only ask that I’d be buried where you can visit. I do not desire to be far from you, even in death.” His hand gripped yours tightly at that.

As morbid as the conversation was getting, Criston had never felt so good. You were truly seeing him in this moment, and you didn’t even mind his sickness. You weren’t afraid, you liked it, even. You liked that he would so easily kill for you and how he’d die for you without issue just as long as you would keep him in death.

You hummed in satisfaction, “You’re giving me very good answers, are you sure you aren’t trying to trick me?”

“I would never deceive you.” He sat up, suddenly serious. His quick movements shook you physically, but you didn’t seem surprised. In order to hold on and keep from falling as you slid back down to his lap, one of your arms wrapped its way around his neck.

You snickered at his reaction, placing a short kiss to his lips, “‘Was only a jest. I know you would never do such a thing. You would never upset me, would you?”

“No.” He whispered, kissing from your lips, down to your jaw softly, “I love you.”

“How much?” You breathed, your eyes fluttering shut.

“More than anything— anyone.” He kept going, sure to reach every bit of open space he could, “You are the very center of my existence, nothing else matters. You’re everything to me. I want you like this forever.”

“Forever? No matter what I do to you?”

His mouth was now below your ear, gently sucking a mark into your skin, “You can do no wrong, my Love, everything you bring me is a gift.”

There were droplets of red still on his face and neck from the blood splatter, but you didn’t mind. Neither of you seemed to care any longer about the gore; the way your red dress was now soaked in it from touching his armor.

You still hadn’t yet released his right hand, and he never dared to pull away. Humming from the pleasure, you slowly brought his hand to rest on your thigh. He immediately adjusted himself so that his fingertips were digging into the soft skin, afraid to move otherwise. Very slowly, you began to rock your hips against him. You could hear his already intense breathing pick up.

“And if my father decides to marry me off?” You whisper into his neck.

Criston lifts his head, dark obsessive eyes boring into your own, “Then I shall kill whatever Lord he chooses.”

x

- venus

[brackenfur]

i really do wish that like. ok when i think about brambleclaw and ashfur, in firestars quest they seem like good friends and get along well, and then we all know what happens in the book series(s) beyond that, but i really would want to give their dynamic more like. impact, and i’ve talked abt it here and there before, but:

i imagine that when bramblepaw first became an apprentice, ashpaw really liked him and treated him like a younger brother, almost. he saw how bramblepaw was kinda shy and he took him under his wing - he would teach him how to leap after leaves, he’d taught him crouches, talk to him about training, that sort of thing. and bramblepaw really looked up to ashpaw bc most of the clan treats him and tawnypaw rly differently, except for ashpaw and fernpaw and a few others. but bramblepaw rly likes that he has a close friend in the clan

and then brindleface is killed. and bramblepaw sees how sad fernpaw and ashpaw are at her vigil, so he comes up to say how sorry he is - he just lost his older brother, swiftpaw, too. and if ashpaw needed to talk, he’d always be there - but when ashpaw looks up at him, he looks….angry. he doesn’t say anything, so bramblepaw leaves because he thinks ashpaw is grieving and needs space, but form then on out, ashpaw won’t even speak to him. and after tawnypaw leaves to shadowclan, bramblepaw feels more alone than ever - he has other friends, but ashpaw was his first real friend, and now ashpaw wont even look at him. and bramblepaw tells firestar about it, saying that maybe it’s because he’s grieving for brindleface, but……..deep down bramblepaw knows why ashpaw is angry at him, he just doesn’t want it to be true.

and after tigerstar is killed, bramblepaw doesn’t really know how to feel since he hates his father, but to see him die like that…….. but he sees the weird, almost smug way ashpaw keeps looking at him and he almost wants to ask him why, what his problem even is, but he thinks about brindleface and decides he doesn’t want to know the answer.

and then after the battle with bloodclan when they kill bone together , he thinks maybe it’ll change - maybe ashpaw will like him again - but outside of some curt words and greetings, they aren’t friends anymore. bramblepaw wants to respect his decision, even if it hurts really bad that he lost his first friend bc of something tigerstar did, but he just wants to focus on becoming a warrior now.

and for a year that’s what he does - sometimes a cat like sorreltail or thornclaw will be like “hey, didn’t you guys used to be friends?” to which brambleclaw doesn’t know what to say - but he’s determined to prove ashfur and everyone else wrong.

and then he meets hawkfrost and starts training in the dark forest and for the first time in years, ashfur really starts to pay attention again. because he stopped trusting brambleclaw after brindleface died - ashfur knows that’s cruel, to blame him for something tigerstar did, but his heart can’t take anymore betrayals and deaths, and he sees it as a measure to protect himself and thunderclan - but when he sees hawkfrost he thinks, oh, i was right. and not only was i right - but squirrelflight is becoming closer to brambleclaw and she doesn’t even know about my mother, how she died. how brambleclaws father killed her to feed to a pack of dogs.

so he starts talking to squirrelflight and hanging out with her, and they get close, but when she goes back to hanging out with brambleclaw, he can’t cope. brambleclaws father took away ashfurs mother, everyone in thunderclan adores brambleclaw again, AND he was made deputy, AND squirrelflight thinks ashfur is this overbearing creep and he’s like, oh hell no.

and THAT to me feels more interesting than in canon but!!!!!!! that’s just me

[onthecrescentofthehill]

g1deon and pyrrha + gideon and harrow throughlines scattered in all of tlt continue to drive me insane.

the initial investigation scenes post the 5th deaths where the 2nd house tries to pull cohort rank control of the situation, gideon & harrow immediately sneak away to learn that the winnowing trial was developed by the second house and cohort founders, g1deon & pyrrha. winnowing as incorporating the other, refusing distractions for the sake of true control, loyalty and duty.

gideon is wearing his sunglasses, rifling through their things. she doesn’t see it as a real place someone would live in, only a stop along the way to somewhere else, more whole.

she sees a gun on the wall that her mother's ghost will use the river memory of to try and kill harrow in the dream of cannan house:

It took Gideon a long time to realise that she was looking at something goddamn ancient: it was a blowback carbine gun. She’d only ever seen pictures. ….. The hairs on the back of Gideon’s neck had risen when the lights came on, and they hadn’t gone back down, as if her intrusion might well tempt time back to claim its grave goods. GTN chapter 19

Carbine rifle, read the key. For a moment she pitied Judith Deuteros’s last seconds. To be killed with this ancient piece of grave goods! It would have been like being set upon by a ghost out of time. HTN chapter 18

gideon reads "one flesh, one end" for the first time. she tells harrow these people were living in each others pockets, the same phrase she'll later use to describe the two of them. pyrrha spent nearly 10,000 years locked in a drawer in gideon the first’s mind bc he couldn't bear to let her go. gideon tells harrow how they feel like strangers despite growing up together.

harrow cant stand the thought and in less than a month harrow will lock gideon in a drawer and gideon the first will relentlessly try to kill harrow in her waking hours to spare her the agony he'll never learn is closely parallel to his, and when she fails to hear his real name her brain starts bleeding:

And he had said: “Ortus, have pity.”

“This is my pity, Lord,” said the Saint of Duty. HTN chapter 20

g1deon was john’s oldest friend, he carried that suitcase in his loyalty to him. then he becomes an amnesiac, immortal thanergy void, absorbing and nullifying the echoes of that catastrophe. founding the cohort that flips planets in the exact mirror to the ecological tragedy they all sacrificed everything to spare earth from. over and over again.

He didn’t even ask me to explain. That was the kind of guy he was. He and I had grown up on the same street. I’d spotted him for mince pies all the time as kids, so stands to reason he let me cut off his arm and carried a nuke for me. John 1:20

in g+p’s room harrow says that theyre all the ninth house has ( = you’re all that i have). gideon firmly says shes "NO ONE'S son or daughter"

but in less than a year gideon’s mother, sitting opposite her father, will recognize pyrrha with a sense of profound relief before her revenant is unceremoniously killed. gideon will watch through harrows eyes, in hiding:

Harrow, I will never forget the look on her face as long as I live, or as long as I die. (…) It was the smile for your old cellmate who’d just landed back in prison, the one that told them at least you were in it together—or more correctly, the smile of someone stepping out of jail after serving a very long sentence, having seen someone there waiting for her. Someone whose presence meant total reprieve, someone she hadn’t expected. It was a little bit mocking. It was deeply relieved. HTN chapter 50

i don’t have a conclusion to this rn i’m just……much to think abt. the displacement of grief, the loyalty through control, how it just happens over and over and over again and they just bear witness as tools or trapped souls or revenants, clinging to anything they can even if they don’t remember it.

[zeephyre]

CR3 EPISODE 78 SPOILERS

god. i love this fucking campaign. this one's gonna be long as shit.

despite how genuinely depressing this episode was, it also made me really giddy because i love hurt/comfort and there's no point of that if there's no hurt or angst.

im probably gonna go down the line with each member of bells hells, discussing what i can remember off the top of my head, i hope i don't forget anything in my rambles cause this was one of my FAVORITE episodes of the whole campaign and that's saying something.

i love ashton. i have loved ashton the most since the very beginning and for a lot of it i was really worried that ashton was deliberating running from opening up with bells hells while also going out of their way to have one-to-one convos with different members that were deep and insightful but never went as far as they needed to.

i am projecting a bit with analysis of ashton but taliesin does it best when rp'ing for ash and generally talking abt him in interviews. ashton reminds me of myself, which is not a compliment and is actually really terrible. ironically enough, ashton said the same thing abt fcg. i have spent a lot of time hurting myself by sabotaging the things i love, or embracing the worse parts of myself simply because it's become habit. there's always going to be a piece of you that finds the sadness, anger, guilt, emptiness, whatever -- comforting because it's all you've known.

ashton mourns a life that he never lived. i find myself mourning versions of myself that i would hate but still...yearn for them like an itch or an ache that comes from hurt. ashton wanted their family back, in whatever desperate, corrupted way he felt he should have done it, and hearing how he described feeling like he looked past the cautionary tale simply because he thought the pain they caused him should have meant something else made me think of imogen.

beautiful, sweet, powerful, dangerous, sad imogen temult. i won't comment on how everyone berated ashton because that's not really surprising nor was anything imogen said or did pertaining to ash shocking whatsoever. but... there's smth abt the destruction that ashton did to feel close to the idea of a family that doesn't really exist that just parallels so well with the fight that imogen has been undergoing since childhood. against the red storm, now against the call of ruidus, and the temptation and attachment she felt and still feels to her mother, despite everything liliana has done that jeopardizes everything imogen is fighting for.

abandoned by her mother, shunned by her own town, ignored and feared by her father.

going back to ashton again, there's smth to be said abt the guilt and shame that comes from making horrible choices that put yourself and the ppl you love in danger that forever changes the way they perceive you. I've done it. i had to fight to make things better. it can't be enough to love someone enough that would die for them, you have to fight to stay alive. if not even for yourself, for THEM.

i know it can be unhealthy to rely on others so much, but it's certainly not easy to fight for yourself when the foundation isn't there. learning how to love without throwing yourself on a blade is more important than self sufficiency. that comes afterwards.

i...don't like laudna's reliance on delilah briarwood this episode. i... there's smth very ironic about laudna being worried abt ashton's betrayal and the way he hurt her and the others with his deception and selfishness, coupled with my understanding of the absolute fucking insane, borderline stupid danger of even SPEAKING to delilah briarwood, let alone working WITH her.

i think it's hypocritical, but i don't feel any animosity towards laudna. just..sadness. delilah is a parasite. a disgusting, cruel, evil bitch who wants laudna to be... that weak little girl easily crushed under her thumb. she may preach abt laudna's latent power and potential, but laudna won't serve her purpose if she TRULY gains the strength to cast delilah aside forever. i don't think delilah was telling the truth abt their fates last episode, and that's why i so deeply want laudna to toss aside that defeatist mindset that has only gotten worse since episode one. maybe im wrong, maybe delilah was actually being genuine.

i kept watching imogens/laura's face during laudna's moments speaking with delilah alone, and it just made me sad because she didn't need to be alone. she had imogen, but she still felt the need to run and hide away. god i just want her to be happy.

i really liked the doll she made for ashton, even though delilah made it really creepy for no reason, the dramatic cunt she is. her assessment of ashton as being a child may seem rude or even a projection but to me it's the truth. ashton has not grown past his childhood. past abandonment and pain and mistrust and love that never lasts and always hurts. that shit followed them to adulthood and anyone who has any number of mental illnesses and childhood trauma will tell you that it's so easy to feel yourself stuck as a reactive, stubborn, bitter little kid trapped in a shitty cycle of pain. both ashton and laudna this episode felt like they were both broken, sad children interacting. laudna clinging to comfort from delilah, hiding away, mentally reverting to the person she was the last time she was in whitestone. ashton, clinging to his lost childhood and the acceptance of laudna's doll, the admittance that they'd never had a doll before. god... they're so sad, im gonna scream.

fcg apologizing for forcing faith down ashtons throat was sweet and so was ashton apologizing for being so bitter abt fcg's faith. now i just need fcg to apologize for the multiple instances where he put laudna in danger by casting turn undead with no acknowledgement of laudna afterwards.

fcg saying that ashton didn't love anyone or care about anyone hurt me a bit, because while i understood why they were saying those things, it was so... obviously untrue. before all of this, ashton has shown again and again and again how much he loves bells hells, and especially fcg. i know that ashton almost dying over smth so arrogant, desperate and foolish would make anyone question what someone's idea of "love" is, but still. it stung. maybe because i have been there. i know what it's like to be doubted and mistrusted because you ruined smth good callously and carelessly.

chetney... chetney really loves fearne. i don't care if y'all don't get it or if y'all still think chet is some joke character with no substance, I never understood that shit and i simply never will. chet and fearne probably have the best relationship in all of bells' hells -- and yes, that includes imogen and laudna because god knows those two have shit brewing under the surface that needs to be HANDLED, i.e: laudna being defeatist abt their relationship even tho it's barely begun.

chetney's a good man. him going after fearne was the best choice and im glad he gave her a couple laughs before she went off to wander. he cares about her so much, and he BELIEVES in her so much, and i love them. i LOVED the way he went in on ashton. hurting fearne by making a shitty decision and letting her bear the burden of watching ashton die right in front of her was... bad. it is very complicated but, that's pretty cut and dry.

i like him testing ashton again and again. telling him to leave but also being glad they chose to be brave and stay, and face the consequences of their actions. attacking ashton to see what all of any of that shit was even for. (im a little bummed that the shard didn't fully wake up yet but...i love the suspense im just impatient).

FEARNE. CALLOWAY. i love fearne, and i love the breakdown during the first part of the episode. it was such a raw moment and it established the tone of the episode so quickly. im glad that fearne knows that while ashton fucked up royally, her rejecting of the shard and complacence in ashton's plans was also royally stupid. i don't think her being terrified of taking the shard is bad or stupid, it's actually one of my favorite fearne character choices. no one ever actually asked her WHY she didn't want it, and when she said she didn't want it, it was still decided by the hells that the shard would go to fearne. (they're very shit at communication, poor babies). im happy that she specifically clarified that ashton did not threaten or manipulate her (plus he gave her many opportunities to not be involved with his bullshit if it made her uncomfy so im hoping the insane critters who keep treating ashton like some evil, predatory person finally stfu).

fearne being so scared of a version of herself that was sad, lonely, and "evil" to the point that she chose to believe that it was ashton's destiny to take in both shards is so... so rich. i hope she talks about that more in the next episode because i don't think she's EVER brought it up since exu. i don't think the shard would change fearne's personality but god the fact that SHE is so afraid of herself and what she's capable of.... AHHHH. love this damn party.

i hope liam knows that expect really painful roleplaying from him when he comes back cause i really do need ashton and orym interactions like i need air.

the choice to go to the fey realm was brilliant and i missed nana morri so it's a win for me. bells hells COULD have done what they've been doing for a while now, which is ignoring the pain they're all feeling and pushing forward, but ashton doing what they did was the straw that broke the camel's back and im GLAD because i have been begging them all to have real conversations with each other that don't get cut short prematurely for whatever reason.

i do hope that they do really lean into the self care aspect involving therapy and talking through their issues with ALL of the members present or even in groups, and it isn't just fun and games. they're prone to distraction. i love my little guys.

:( two weeks without bells hells. is it thursday, yet???

[mlady-magnolia]

Your welt and himeko art fucking killed me dead so I am asking what you think abt their dynamic

Hehe hi!! I’m so glad you liked the art!

I’ll be honest, I always liked Welt, but never really gave him too much focus when it came to HSR’s story. He was always a fascinating character, his backstory was so interesting since he canonically jumped from Honkai Impact’s universe, and his general dynamic was cute with the Express Crew! I kinda just saw him as Himeko’s silent guardian, secretly sworn to protect this universe’s version of her, and nothing else past that

And then I started getting back into Honkai Impact lore (for Himeko, of course) and my god, it recontextualised SO MUCH about how I saw Welt. I blame the Alien Space manga…

Yes, he’s still Himeko’s guardian, her ever-vigilant protector, cursed by guilt to see the remnant of his own Himeko in this new version of her. He’s working through his own things as he travels with the Express, and Himeko knows that, but she won’t pry, she understands being haunted by one’s past ghosts.

He’s still her teacher, giving wisdom when she asks, and Himeko sees the years of experience behind his words. She trusts him to guide her true, always will take his words into heavy consideration when making a decision.

And in the end, honestly? I think Welt’s kind of a father-figure to Himeko, at least in the Star Rail universe. A dependable and wise figure she knows always has her back. Welt looks at Himeko like a father would his daughter, pride in seeing how far she’s made it. That, in this universe at least, she’s happily made it to the stars like she had dreamed of when she was his student. Happy to see Himeko in her true place travelling the universe.

Welt cares so deeply for Himeko because he’s seen what her fate could be, and he’s determined to stop that outcome. And Himeko cares for Welt in turn, her first human crew mate aboard the Astral Express and truest confidant among the Nameless.

Also, because I’m gay as fuck and in my own corner of fanon, I make Kafka and Himeko kiss, I headcanon Welt definitely knows about Himeko’s past with Kafka and her current situation where the Stellaron Hunter keeps dropping in to visit the Navigator. He is disappointed in Himeko, but he would never get in the way of the her being happy. If Kafka tries anything, he will use his cane and gravitationally disintegrate her in a heartbeat.

Yeah, wow, I rambled. Uh, thanks for coming to my TED Talk, I guess?? I didn’t realise I had so much to say about them. So sorry if this was not what you were expecting-

[antxnous]

I’m sad and having Bill Calhoun thoughts so I’m dumping hcs and more basura here. this is so fucking long hi

Prefacing this by saying I know I’m in the minority but “we were all young then” translates to “nowhere near the age I am now” when Joshua says it (TO ME!!!), so a 27 year old would be “young” in his crispy eyeballs.

I imagine Bill’s been on expeditions before, this one was probably the furthest he’s gone from California but he’s no stranger to roughing it out and doing outreaching and accompanying others for support. I love the idea that he was more in a teaching position than anything else and pairing him with Edward made sense to maintain the inexperienced/experienced balance (and this is Edward hc territory but in my brain his name was tossed around in less than favourable ways and Bill was thought to pacify his rowdiness).

I rlly don’t usually think this hard into one-off characters but the idea he has a fiancée who is also a teacher of some sorts… rlly driving home his eventual irritation and aggravation with Edward basically keeping him hostage while he starts up the Legion… he’s got ppl back home and he tries to remind Edward that he does too (and I think it works for a bit, but Ed is WHIPPED by his own grandeur and jotch).

Bill and Ed met for the first time, had dinner at Bill’s place and Ed brought his mom. All was fine. Bill’s fiancée hating the idea he’s going to more or less be responsible for a temperamental 20 year old, Bill’s like whatever. We all were 20. Wasteland sucks.

They get along really well the entire trip over. Ed is excited to do some ethnography and when he gets a little colonial-y, Bill always puts him in his place. Bill teaching Ed a few medical things along the way and listening the Ed rant about his anthro interests (Roman Empire……)

Ed kinda getting the father figure treatment…. Projecting it onto Bill. Late night talks about his insecurities with his single mother, dead father, his schooling… where the future is taking him. Ed’s afraid of it all but Bill reassured him it’s just his twenties talking.

Bill’s a smoker, kind of a habit. Brought loose tobacco with him and rolls his own cigs if he can help it. Sometimes lets Ed smoke.

Now…I’m part of the group that thinks they stumbled across Josh in Utah bc idk. I liek it. I’ve got my own hcs for the meeting but this AINT ABT THAT!! Bill finds Josh, brings him to camp, and he’s the nicest person Joshua has ever met. The rest of the trip Bill has to act as advisor, mediator, and caretaker for those two… pulling them apart when they get violent, shutting down their arguments before it gets to that point… stitching them both up.

Bill obviously knows how to defend himself, but once Joshua gets added to the camp, he takes the backseat when it comes to hunting and exploring and shit. Camp cook, does their laundry, sometimes scouts. Doing his own independent research on making herbal remedies with the shit out in Utah/Arizona. Starts making healing powder. He trusts them to get their work done and if they fight, they’ll both crawl back to the same place at night anyway.

Bill leaving them to suck off each others insecurities in loneliness and personal affairs, letting them toss back dangerous hypotheticals and philosophies makes them less dependent on him. He’s inadvertently edged these two together in a way that becomes inseparable. They start speaking in languages he doesn’t understand and he brushes it off because… it’s youth. Whatever. They’re getting along.

Bill keeping a diary just like Ed, but his is more personal and less ethnographic. Writing to his fiancée in the margins about the way things are going… the longer the trip the more he missed CA.

When they get taken by the Blackfoot, Bill’s collected demeanour finally cracks when he’s constantly fighting with Edward to maintain some humanity when he starts suggesting slaughter. Looking to Joshua, who until recently had been a breath of fresh air for Bill when it came to temperament and impulse…. Finding a blank, maybe even excited, look staring back at him because Joshua is already sold on Edward’s new philosophy. Now Bill’s become the loner.

They keep him around to fix them up, to heal their new troops… those two get to share a tent and Bill is forced to sleep in the tent with his patients. Watching as Edward demands Bill put energy into saving fit males over “the unfit”. Wondering what happened to the eager anthropologist he left the Boneyard with.

He tries to argue with Joshua, maybe he could convince Edward to see reason. Joshua laughing at his pleading and insulting him, threatening to kill him if he keeps being a nuisance… now he’s wondering what happened to the reserved boy he rescued from the side of the river.

Bill’s become the Legion’s first slave in an unspoken agreement, and when Edward orders Joshua to kill him before he can run away back to the NCR, Joshua does it, solidifying himself as the Legion’s second.

so you’ll never see Bill again, but Edward (and to some extent, Joshua) can’t shake him. he isn’t sure what to do with his corpse because disposing of it like a tribals would be wrong — Bill was more than that. So his sun bleached skull greets visitors to the Grand Canyon and his rib cage sits in Flagstaff and his clothes sit in Edward’s trunk, and Joshua wears his snakeskin belt and the legion uses HIS version of healing powder and—

biwwiam calhoun… :3

[springonmytraptillicomeback]

YOU!!!!!!!!! HENRGY HEADCANONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HENRGY HEADCANONS???? WOOOOOOOO!!!!!

I debated on making my Henry autistic, but I like the thought of- even though he doesn’t like human interaction- his human interaction is actually natural and not kinda forced like William’s which makes Will v v jealous

Henry LOVES fishing, he takes Charlie (she enjoys it), he forces William to come along sometimes (he hates it but comes anyway cause he likes watching Henry do it), he even takes the Afton kids (Micheal is fine with it, the fish freak out Evan but he comes because he likes the river, Elizabeth likes holding the fish). Henry probably has one of those mounted fish on his wall, and a bunch of fishing rods and hooks.

Henry’s cold and stoic to everyone except people he actually likes. He’s not mean but to employees he’s known as “the scary one”. Also speaking of work, if there’s a customer asking for the manager William will go and talk to them and if they aren’t satisfied/being rude or something then Henry is basically the back up

Before William, he didn’t really care what he wore, mostly just buying clothes that fit and are comfy and that don’t look completely ridiculous. But then Will took him shopping and his wardrobe got an upgrade. And the only reason he continues to wear the “nice” clothing is because Will likes it

He’s got a bit of a god complex, basically he makes animatronics good and that’s pretty cool to him (and also if he found out abt William’s worshiping thing he’d actually be rlly flattered)

Henry has no idea how to be a father. Nothing else to say he just had no fucking clue. He tries but he’s not that good

He really likes his beard, he’s super proud of it and he thinks it makes him look cool. He ends up accidentally passing that to Mike who in the future grows a beard but after the scoop all his hair falls out and Mike gets Really Upset about it

Henry knew that William was behind the MCI and Charlie’s death but he didn’t say anything because he’s a Faggot and morally bankrupt. William knew that Henry knew and Henry knew that William knew that Henry knew but they don’t say anything about it

Also he’s cis in a trans way. I don’t know how to explain it. He’s like if a trans man was cis I don’t know where I’m going with this.

[horizon-verizon]

https://www.tumblr.com/groovybiha/749056181944958976/why-does-she-want-to-be-queen-given-that-the?source=share

"Why does she need a special reason to want to be queen? Also, show! Rhaenyra is the type of queen who is willing to lose her title for what she considers is best for the realm. But of course, she hasn't shown any good qualities."

She has no unique traits or qualities that make her really stand out, we don’t really know her true motives or intentions behind anything outside of just being short sited and mistakenly believing her position as heir will be enough to shield her from consequences and her complacency fueled by arrogance. Plus we don’t really know the reasons behind wanting to rule outside of “i will be queen because daddy says so”. Why does she want to be queen? What kind of ruler does she intend to be? What legacy did she wish to leave behind? Entitlement aside, without these things being made clear, it’s impossible to really root for her when you don’t know what they intend to do or stand for as a ruler.

OP is not totally wrong. I actually happen to think that show!her could have had a "special" reason to want to be queen.

HOWEVER what I think it could have been is not the altruistic kind or one focused on lawmaking necessarily. It's a defiant one. [#2 of the list below]

And, yes, why must she "rise to the occasion" as if even if she were one of the better rulers, she'd wouldn't have been usurped....the greens/Otto didn't care about her abilities unless they were to block them from installing Aegon as heir! They just wanted power and Otto explicitly states that he doesn't think that Rhaenyra will ever be accepted bc she is female in the 1st or 2nd episode.

So, Rhaenyra, as other male heirs, should be heir because her father named her as heir and she is the eldest. The usual way heirs are chosen! To say that she needs to do "more" to be seen as "deserving the throne" is a moot point when the reality is the alternative is any of the greens, who are thankfully not very good candidates on their own merit. Why so much scrutiny for her, as if she has done horrible evil things that spell out her rule being one of tyranny?! When the evidence shows she's anything but and that's more likely with any of the green boys?

I've often mentioned how siphoned [post-writer: ozymalek] of character older Rhaenyra seemed. I know some of those I follow and mutuals feel differently, that older Rhaenyra has gone through at the Keep a lot for her to have become more reserved, less outwardly expressive, less bold, etc. It's simply going to always make an ulcer in my mouth. If it was anyone else, I'd be fine with this, but this is Rhaenyra, whom GRRM himself has shown that even after her time at KL, she retains a fieriness that I simply do not see in show!Rhaenyra. Not bc Rhaenyra was anything "special" as her own person, but in principle, I think it's beyond disrespectful to wantonly change a person's character simply because you happen to believe they are unpalatable. even if this character is the most evil person in the word, you're just doing it on behalf of your own feelings rather than interested in honest fiction. It shows that you don't really respect a person's humanity unless it makes you "comfortable".

All which lends to wish-fulfillment text that could lean in multiple directions and frameworks--including the sexist one HotD takes--mishaping the story itself into something not like itself. It comes from the writers not caring or fully getting F&B [ozymalek], but also latent misogyny.

But OP was talking more abt what would make Rhaenyra seem a good, capable ruler on her own, which yeah, like I said in other posts:

not every protagonist needs to be a more "moral" character, bc it seems OP's approach to "likeability" is whether or not this character will be a good ruler or one who thinks majorly outside of her own desires, which is very fair. But we also should look at what the text is saying about the character when they are not "likeable"--this' not really Rhaenyra's role, that's more Dany's. The point of the Dance and us caring abt Rhaenyra is to witness how regardless of her character, she's basically set up, how it didn't matter that she was amoral or tried to impress anyone, they usurped her bc they wanted power and she was a woman. HotD rather should have written for multiple times where Rhaenyra's unfairly assessed apart from actual truths of her character for audiences to understand that.

and thus HotD failed to give us the entire process and set up for why Rhaenyra would definitely would seek for power when she's been put into a corner for most of her life as was book!Rhaenyra---I tend to believe that Rhaenyra is asserting her right to ascend in the orig story because she wants to claim that which has always been denied to her according to her sex, or what people have said was something she never deserved....this is a wound that HotD should have given to their Rhaenyra, or made more obvious, and we even see the beginnings of it in episode 5 when she says "I am the crown", or a hint of it. When she's thinking of her role as the protector of the realm. That ambition born of determination beyond what daddy wants her to do. Instead, she has been pushed back to making most of her avoidant decisions about war based on Viserys' faulty no-war-ism---NOT because I think wars are not devastating and that we shouldn't take the steps to avoid it, but bc it's beyond obvious that, in F&B, the war or some sort of conflict was going to happen regardless bc Aegon refused to accept Rhaenrya's terms...this was before Aemond killed Luke, btw. And HotD did not show us Aegon flat out refusing Rhaenyra's attempts at preventing a war, instead showing us dead-Luke off after Rhaenyra sends Luke away...that context is missing. Also, in the show, she's tasked with being the one to make sure their line leads to the Prince that was Promised, while Aegon the Elder never was. We don't even get a discussion or see how she processes how she would address this dilemma even in the event that she gives up the throne and Luke doesn't die. Her talk with Daemon, when he chokes her out--maybe instead of that nonsense, they could have had them talk about this event and even if he feels like he's indulging her, Daemon gives his thoughts and they converse about it? But no, HotD wants the spectacle of marital abuse. 🙍🏿‍♂️.

So OP has the point of HotD not showing us WHY/HOW Rhaenyra decided she must be Queen, even if it were for more self-interested reasons, they'd still be reasons with a sound line of strong rationale--for some relatable even.

Basically, OP is describing HotD writing Rhaenyra sexistly--show!Rhaenyra is more of an extension of her dad's wishes and motherliness than her own person to me. Book!Rhaenyra, I believe, never would have really pursued the throne or want to rule if Viserys hadn't named her as his heir, but because she's put into that position and others wish to define her as unworthy based on her gender, she must do more than fight for the throne but fight for her gender value not to block her from her loss of dignity. Of course the greens deciding to usurp her & her deciding to fight esp after Luke's death began a war that would claim thousands of smallfolk and highborn lives, but I also don't want this element that fuels a feminist thought to be obscured simultaneously. Otherwise, the motive for why marginalized groups tend to be more tenacious or even "ruthless" than their more privileged peers, social superiors, etc., will easier characterize them as "unfathomable" and irrationally cruel. When the rationale rather is right there in our faces, thus reinforce=ing the desire for the simplicity of the dangerous status quo.

And I can see why they'd be more intrigued by Alicent, yes they did give "glimpses of what lead to alicent being how she was in later years".

...It's also very obvious that Alicent has also been dumbed down by the latter end of episode 8...arguably worse than Rhaenyra for the sake of her becoming more of a Trumpwife blindly trying to just follow the rules. And done so through making her a SA victim by 15 instead of a 18 year old with ambitions of her own. That's the male gaze at work. [post by @xenonwitch], not that SA victims who act like this doen't exist, but that they made Alicent this. Thought that tis change was somehow less sexist than her ambitious Evil Stepmother original self. And expected us all to just take it and erroneously use the ol "F&B is unreliable", as if ages aren't accurately told in the book!

To this day, I still haven't heard reasons as to hwo show!Alicent's rewriting isn't a sexist change. Not "uninteresting", sexist.

Yes book Alicent was a traditionalist, but she at least strategized and was kept abreast of what was going on around her! So, no, Alicent doesn't intrigue me either in the show nor am I very thrilled with her character who seem to just mope around all day about her not knowing anything or where to find "help"; she just repulses me. Her suffering does not endear her to me, and even with me seeing how she became the women she is, the writing still has her unable to manipulate others and be too manipulated. Much too vulnerable. It's a clear dilution of character like Rhaenyra, just in a different way.

So me and OP agree in that they should have just stuck to the book. Just not so much on Alicent and defintely not on Rhaenyra being "spoiled" as they imply.

Also, Show!Rhaenyra has always performed her duty! She obeyed Viserys when he gave orders, she accepted the position, she married LAenor despite not wanting to, she attended those meetings, she even went beyond any instruction and retrieved that egg back from Dameon no muss no fuss!

believing her position as heir will be enough to shield her from consequences and her complacency fueled by arrogance

This was never the case. I'm very tired of people implying and accusing women and girls who act this way as "spoiled" and "entitled". She was actually asking for fair terms for her "duties", which Viserys shut down the minute he kicked Daemon out and refused Rhaenyra's obvious choice in book and show. What are her other duties? Cup-bearing, attending council? She does all that!!! Being faithful to husband so she has leg heirs? She triedi that, it didn't work bc LAENOR IS NOT THE TYPE OF GAY MAN WHO CAN GET IT UP WITH A WOMAN ENOUGH TO IMPREGNATE HER and these same people would rail her if she were to use a Valyrian sex slave or something. And if she tried someone else, how do you know they wouldn't try to take advantage of that and she'd have another worry and danger to her and her kids to deal with?!!!

People keep saying that she should have not gone sleeping with anyone or "hurting" Criston and people around her, when really it was those people who made dumbass choices that affected her.

Marriage tour? Viserys should have married her to Daemon. Her sleeping with Cole? Daemon brought her to a brothel, and why is she so stressed? bc her dad married her best friend and said friend is trying to still be friends AS WELL AS be her superior. Mom just died a few years back, and said friend has already had a son and is pregnant while Aemma was cut open after multiple miscarriages and traumatic births. Viserys is aware Otto is there to get his blood on the throne, yet needs to be told he needs to dismiss him, only to later bring him back! Again, marrying her to a gay man, thus putting parentage of her kids to a little more doubt than otherwise. Laenor going off doing fuck all when he is supposed to be more at her side than he is. She became the Princess of Dragonstone in action and actually became a ruler in all but name for abt 6 yr in the show, 10 in the bks! That is performing a duty (yeah she left bc of Alicent, still doesn't make it any less a duty of the designated heir to look after Dragonstone and the dynasty's dragons housed there)! Her with Cole? Wasn't she drunk and he had ample ability to just leave! Of course it wasn't smart, but it was hardly either an attack or something that other nobles and royals don't already do... so why is she so uniquely amoral?!

A woman/girl who's either spiraling, terrified of not having or being able to retain what little autonomy one has over one's life, or just resistant against constrictive social mores on her based on gender--even when she is in the upper class--should never be shamed. Called "unfortunate", sure, but not shamed!!! These people sound like they'd call young girls "fast"!

Rhaenyra doesn't think her position will save her from harm. Her talk with Alicent proves that, where she had to turn the tables against Alicent to avoid getting punished unfairly. And epsiode 7 has her do similar, bc she can see where it could have easily turned into people looking more at her sons than Aemond with the restoration of the bastardry claim (once again, go back to what I said about Rhaenyra not being able to get Laenor to impregnate her). She was the one who had to prompt & guide her father or trigger Alicent so she'd protect her sons, Viserys wasn't being very competent! Her position as heir and as Viserys' daughter certainly helped her, but it would have been useless in that situation without her having to work at actually making it work for her! And we see how her being heir actually has turned her life inside out where she's put into this ort of position because her society has never had a female ruler and doesn't think she is capable of really being a leader bc of her gender! Her heir status actually gives her a set of unique problems!!!!

She wasn't (in-world) "complacent"; she was just horribly written in her elder years and in her younger years she was still reeling from being forced into a place she's deathly afraid of, no pun intended. Her mother died in the ambitions of men; she's afraid of being married off to a man who'd allow her to die for his own ambitions by using her body for heirs and access to Targ power. She is at war with her identity and gender. And she is a teenager while all this is happening--no matter the time, teens will rebel to try to see their own limits as well as try to find ways to thicken and realize their own autonomy. What we are actually seeing is a teenage girl forced into denying her own desires and needs until, gravely misunderstood, she's compelled to suppress her deeper desires.

That was the intent HotD had for her. And you could still have this, but make her less...of a female-friendless doormat?

[pansy-picnics]

in one of ur order posts you mentioned cass and lance understanding each other and I am VERY interested to hear ur thoughts. I always thought those 2 would have a fun dynamic...

AUGHHHHH YES THANK YOU I THINK SO TOO….!!!!!! Idk it’s kind of a mess when i try to put it into words but it’s like…something about them both being in the “shadow” of rapunzel and eugene respectively. they just both handle it very differently…bc lance i feel is always looking out for others and it leads him to neglect himself a lot, but when he really looks into it and he sees eugene’s growth and how he’s come into his own…how he’s found his roots and even his father….as happy for him as he is lance can’t help but feel a bit bitter sometimes. it’s the secondary character syndrome yk!!!! lance just hasn’t really reached a “breaking point” like cass has because he’s trying to manage it in a healthier way…he’s trying to make a life for himself with what he has and he’s realizing he likes things a lot as they are. but that doesn’t make that grief of what he wish he could’ve had just go away….so when he does confide in someone abt those feelings nobody rlly gets it more than cass does. and more than anyone else LANCE is the one who truly understands why cass did what she did.

this little fic of them is very important to me... this one is also one i think about a lot. it’s hard to find lance fics in this economy. :( i like to think they bonded a little leading up to destinies collide, not enough for cass to change her mind about leaving but enough to give them both some food for thought you feel me…..they both just have this unspoken Understanding with each other, and they both admire each other a lot. the shenanigans cass lance and eugene would get into would also be SO silly so it’s a shame we never really saw them interact </3

cass seems to be inherently drawn to the golden retriever type anyways whether she likes it or not so i’m sure lance and rapunzel drag her out on day trips all the time. she and lance gossip together and stuff yk...i think post series she’ll often still go out of the kingdom for work trips (in my head after settling with rapunzel she works as an ambassador for corona, mostly just to be able to get out more while still helping raps), and sometimes in the middle of the night as shes on her way back she’ll stop at his place in old corona just to steal food from him. leaves him a horribly written note and a cool rock or something. like. “Took a piece of the pie in the oven. There were already slices taken out so I figured it’d be fine. Oh I’m back btw. Not dead yet”

they also play pranks on eugene together ALL the time and this is canon actually i made the show. lance can honestly get her to do anything if he can convince her it’ll annoy eugene somehow /hj

ALSO LANCE BEING A WINGMAN FOR CASSUNZEL IS SOMETHING I NEED SOOOOO BAD AND I CANT BELIEVE NOBODY’S THOUGHT OF IT BEFORE. Like honestly i think if she were to tell a single soul about her hopeless crush it would be lance. i think he’s the only one who would be normal about it and keep it a secret tbh. lance just keeps randomly trying to put them in Situations together and cass is getting really suspicious that he’s doing it on purpose but she doesn’t REALLY have any actual evidence so she can’t say anything and it’s driving her crazy. rapunzel is just like “Cassss don’t be silly ur overthinking it ^_^” (shes lying to herself)

IDK. I THINK THEY’D HAVE SILLY SHENANIGANS AND THEY MAKE ME EMO TBH. The secondary characters always cursed to live in someone else’s shadow…..finding solace and friendship in each other………..Though one is sidelined for a much more obvious reason than the other (cough cough RACISM) but its Fineeeee its fine i’m normal about it😁 /s

[nickwildelvr]

Genshin rant that I have to get out bc no one has talked abt this but

BIGGEST PET PEEVE is when people make childes dad abusive or homophobic because he sent childe to the military bc ik that sounds bad OUT OF CONTEXT but lets put this into his fathers perspective ok. His “timid and hesitant” 14 yr old boy suddenly goes missing for 3 days and has come back a completely different boy. He is now an egotistical violent maniac. He HURTS people, PICKS FIGHTS WITH EVERYONE, imagines tearing off BIRDS’ WINGS. And even though his dad was extremely worried the last straw was when childe took place and POSSIBLY EVEN STARTED a HUGE BRAWL with CLOSE FATALITIES. HE ALMOST KILLED PEOPLE. Do u realize how scary that is to see that type of drastic change from your own child(e). (I had to) THAT MAN WAS SCARED OF HIS OWN SON. THATS SCARY TO SEE??? and in this little town of morepesok it’s not like there’s fucking mental hospitals let alone ANYWHERE IN TEYVAT so at that point what else is there to do. I mean u CANT just let him get worse as he gets older he’s probably gonna join some gang or smthn. So “he had no choice but to send his BELOVED SON to the fatui”. It’s not like he did it to make his son worse or to hurt him, plus childe was FAR from hating it and still loves his job. Plus he gets big bucks too 🤤❕

And I do not for one second think that childe resents his father for it. Now I still definitely don’t think they have the best relationship when it comes to opening up though, or anything emotional, maybe their past plus as dash of toxic masculinity in there. I feel like they would both avoid the topic too, maybe sometimes it’s a little bit stiff between them. Childe would probably be a little more closed off to his old man than he is to his mom yk cuz there’s no way he’s not a mamas boy. BUT THEY STILL FUCKING LOVE EACH OTHER AND HIS DAD ISNT HITTING HIM OR CALLING HIM SLURS LIKE GOD. Leave that man alone he loved his son more than anything and still probably does.

I’m sad childe isn’t that major of a character to the point that we would probably ever get a close look into his relationships with his family let alone his father but that’s just my personal take on their dynamic. I just am GETTING TIRED of people saying this like “I bet childe hates his father” “his dads probably homophobic” “poor childe he got sent the the fatui :((“ MAYBE BC HE ALMOST KILLED PEOPLE???? Like what That’s on him bruh 💀

I removed the drawing I originally put bc anything angst that I draw makes me cringe so bad after a week 💀💀💀💀

[vigilskeep]

Thinking about when you said Anders is bringing A LOT emotionally to the table with Keir...

Thinking about Red Hawke and Red Hawke Malcolm...

You saying in an AU where Leandra passed instead of Malcolm that he would have a much more strained relationship with his kids...

The parallels of Leandra leaving a wealthy life for apostasy and Keir leaving for Anders.

There's something happening here. Is history repeating itself?

there’s a lot to say in terms of cycles! hawke having their father’s personality is so fascinating for that and handers is so fascinating for the obvious parallel to malcolm and leandra

i would say i don’t play keir and malcolm as carbon copies of each other. keir is trying to be his father, because he thinks that’s his job. being “red” does come naturally to keir in terms of bluntness, but a lot of the way keir has learned to behave is about overdoing the aggression especially when putting on a front with strangers, to fill out his father’s shoes so to speak and cover up his relative lack of sheer charisma. malcolm was a prodigy and, like, a romantic hero, i have to characterise him as a powerful speaker and a quick thinker in a way keir simply isn’t. on the other hand, keir IS better at doing affection than malcolm was. he’s earnest with the people he loves in the sense that he’s “bluer” with them, he’s very physically affectionate, all in a way that malcolm was never really capable of. but he and malcolm both find it very hard to express that verbally

(this actually characterises a lot of my keir and bethany dynamic, because i think a younger bethany looked up to keir a lot and a few years of separation give her the perspective to be like, oh you’re just pretending to be dad. that’s kind of embarrassing isn’t it. does this really work on people. JGSHSJSKSK.)

when i say anders is bringing a lot emotionally to the table i mean that in game he expresses his feelings verbally a lot, he’s a romantic, he’s a talker. i’ve made jokes abt just how many more words he gets of dialogue when i write them lmao. he makes declarations of love, he has ideas about relationships even if he’s not familiar with actually being in them outside of what you can get away with in the circle, he has fantasies and ideals and concerns and the ability to say all of this aloud is a luxury to him, one he couldn’t bring himself to waste. keir by contrast doesn’t like to talk abt his own feelings, it’s not something he was taught to do. he likes it from anders, but his own feelings are supposed to be his own problem and not put onto anyone else. similarly to how he’s an intensely fear-driven person bc he internalises like all of it rather than expressing anything bc it’s his job to make everyone else feel safe. and yeah i would say that’s similar to the malcolm and leandra dynamic in my canon

honestly the interesting reversal of all this is actually the “fugitives together” ending, in that keir abandoning everything for anders actually switches him to his mother’s role. which is i think true to keir having more in common with leandra than he thinks. anders being the only other character who gets compared to malcolm (by bethany) is also super interesting

[aemiron-main]

sooo I’m thinking thoughts abt all the sauna scenes in s3. and the implications of the imagery of Mike helping lock a sauna door while a somewhat queercoded, shirtless dude tries to break out when considered in the context of mike’s internalized homophobia + the fact that billy DOES break out, he, much like mike’s sexuality and IH, can’t stay repressed forever. especially since, like I’m gonna talk about in my gay Mike analysis, Mike is the one who holds the sauna door open (despite people yelling at him to shut it) and then looks disgusted with himself.

like I don’t have many firm thoughts on billy & queercoding yet, but he IS a character who’s associated with negative perceptions of queerness (getting called a faggot by his father) & so it would make sense for him to be a character who ties into a representation of mike’s IH, as he’s associated with hateful/negative perceptions do queerness- and specifically, his dad’s line is about billy “staring in the mirror like a faggot”, so the homophobia is narratively linked to self-perception/the mirror, much like how internalized homophobia is linked to self-perception/homophobia towards oneself.

to be clear: im not saying that the billy scene is JUST about mike’s IH because it’s not. but it IS another extra layer imo, just like how many other scenes in ST have multiple meanings/layers. they could’ve written billy to be trapped anywhere else. but they didn’t. they chose the sauna. a setting associated with mike’s ih. I’m also not a billy apologist but I think there’s a difference between discussing him & the imagery surrounding his character vs apologizing for/liking him. and also I’m not saying mike has a crush on billy or anything, I’m saying that billy in certain scenes acts narratively as a representation of internalized homophobia and queerness for Mike.

there’s also something to be said for how mike’s the one who tries to attack billy when Billy’s attacking El, and Mike failing with his attack. smthn smthn Mike is losing the fight against his IH smthn smthn El saves him again (which, I’ve talked a lot abt in other posts abt El ‘saving’ Mike in situations like this and at the quarry and how it ties into the way that mike’s relationship with El ‘saves’ him from homophobia etc in the short term bc ppl think he’s straight but makes things worse in the long term bc he has to repress himself), but it’s only a temporary save, billy isn’t defeated in that scene, just like how El and Mike’s relationship with her can’t permanently save mike from his own IH/from facing homophobia.

[irlcats-bracket]

Bracket 3 Semifinals 1

Pricetag & Bandit vs Simon

PRICETAG

also named price in another submission

shes fat shes a terrible bitch and shes the love of submitter's life. they dont technically know her breed but she looks like a calico kinda. white and black and brown all over. their favorite spot to kiss her is the little brown diamond on top of her head, but she has all kinds of pretty markings. she'll cuddle submitter but not their parents and hisses at anyone else. hence the bitch. its SO funny. she doesnt "meow" so much as she chirps and yells. u touch her n its the worlds loudest MRAP. submitter leaves for work and they go "bye price!" and she goes "meep" and they say "i love you!" and she goes "mow" and it always makes them smile because she rarely does it to anyone else. shes so fat. she has a big ol premidorial pouch because shes 100% indoor and u can hear her claws go clicclicclic on the floor because shes so heavy. she likes to climb on peoples back. she chases moths but no other bugs and likes to make friends with neighborhood critters. she hates bellyrubs from everyone but submitter. if they leave their door open at night she creeps in and lays in the worst possible spot and makes it impossible to sleep. she makes the best bread loaf. shes so fucking round. SPHEREICAL. submitter love her more then anything ❤❤❤❤❤❤ (here submitter said that i can shrink it if i want to but no fucking way i am shrinking things abt a cat aside from their name maybe)

shes named after a canadian hockey player. submitter hates hockey. thanks uncle C dhsbdjjsjsjsjs

PROPAGANDA

THATS MY FUCKING CAT!!!!

GO VOTE FOR MY CAT!!!!!

how could you possibly vote against this face 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 shes the roundest, bitchiest cat in the whole world and shes my best friend. stealer of cream cheese and hearts.

heres a small collection of price pictures where i think she looks exceptionally round

vote for price orb. shes practically a perfect circle. what more could you want

also look how polite she is

BANDIT

submitter's sweet baby boy. He passed away recently, and submitter misses him dearly. He was the softest cat they'd ever pet, and that's not just them being biased. His fur was silk. He was the friendliest cat too, and when he heard new voices he was always up to come meet people. He also enjoyed being around people, and you could always find him in a room with the family. He enjoyed terrorizing the family dog whenevr he got riled up (dont worry, she enojoyed it too), and he loved to bother submitter's parents when they started working from home. Any call submitter had with their folks, he would always make a background appearance, yelling quite loudly. He also had some of the loudest snoring theyve ever heard, and they're so lucky to have a small audio recording of him sleeping. Submitter had him since they were 8, and he was nearly 17 years old when he passed away. Submitter tries to sleep with a crook in their knee so if he's ever lonely, he can come cuddle.

SIMON

he's two years old but still looks like he's six months old. he also recently cost his father and submitter 4k because he likes to eat random stuff off the ground :) luckily he's adorable, loves to beat them all up in the morning to wake us up, and his little meows sound like, "ba-hoo!"

PROPAGANDA

he is scared of everything that is not his mom, dad, or brother. everything else is to be treated as an very scary, dangerous enemy

he once cost us over 4,000 dollars in vet bills because he loves to try to eat random stuff off the ground. my fiancé and i both work minimum wage so you can imagine how happy we were

he went missing for 15 hours once because he pushed through a window screen and jumped. he is the last cat who would ever willingly go outside so wtf simon ....

he is a gremlin who thinks the world revolves around him (it does)

he loves letting me dress him up in hats, dresses, and shirts!

he loves to lick my fiancés face at 5am and will dig up the covers to get to him

he helps himself to any glass of water left out, even if you're also drinking it

he doesn't understand why people aren't always willing to share their food with him- he wants some!! give him a lil taste!

he also sat like this once ?

anyways i reached the mobile photo limit i hope you like my boy!!

SIMON SWEEP