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maevemarethyu · 4 years

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Unexpected (2/?)

You weren’t expecting it. Neither of you were.

That didn’t mean you weren’t happy with how it ended.

Warnings: Cheating, Threats, Sad Boi Hour, Heatbreak, I’m not quite sure what else.

Steve and Sam are waiting for Bucky when he walks into the shared living room; looking every part of a pair of worried parents. The familiarity of it lifts a weight from his shoulders. Meeting you hadn’t been what he expected, then again, he didn’t know what he was expecting in the first place.

He only knew that you weren’t it and he was glad.

“How’d it go? You rushed outta here before either of us could stop you.” Steve worries, resting a hand on his best friend’s shoulder. Steve had been there for him for as long as Barnes could remember and Sam had been a rock keeping the two old men above water in the new age.

“Y/N is something.” He mutters cryptically as he crashes onto the couch, mind swirling as he tries to make sense of everything that had happened. The lack of elaboration has his friends looking at him for an explanation.

“Something as in good or something as in she threw something at you and called you a liar before chasing your ass away from her house.” Sam asks, taking the seat next to Barnes and earning a glare.

Good. You were definitely good despite your very bad situation. He had run to you half cocked with no plan and laid what was probably the worst news possible on you while your kid was asleep in the other room.

“She- They- a kid. She has a daughter named Laysa. Four weeks old.” Disbelief laces his voice. He could understand why Claire would cheat on him; he was a broken weapon made by HYDRA with more issues than Time Magazine. But, you?

He couldn’t understand why anyone would cheat on you. You were beautiful and thoughtful and the brief glimpse he’d caught of the fire in your eyes made his stomach twist in a way he didn’t want to elaborate on for a long while.

And you had a child. Patrick had a family with you; a domestic life Claire had snubbed Bucky for desiring.

“What?” Steve says through grit teeth. The Captain was like his friend; he too wanted to eventually settle down and start a family. When they were younger, the two Brooklyn boys had it all planned out. They’d marry the loves of their lives and get houses side by side; their kids would grow up together and they’d take turns having Sunday brunches at each other’s houses till they were old and gray.

The dream may have been postponed a few decades but, when Bucky told Steve about proposing to his long-time girlfriend, he was happier than he could ever remember being. After all the shit HYDRA put him through, he was glad Buck had found a nice girl like Claire.

How wrong he had been.

“You did the right thing telling her. She deserved to know.” Sam adds but, Bucky just shakes his head.

“I could have worded it better.” He admits, twisting the ring on his finger. “She opened the door and I blanked. Then I basically yelled it in her face: Your husband is fucking my wife.”

He watches Steve’s face go red from secondhand embarrassment and Sam fails in holding back a laugh but, they all fall silent when someone clears their throat. Barnes feels the hairs on the back of his neck raise as he reluctantly turns to face the new person in the room. A person he had purposefully left out of this because A. She was on a mission and B. He thought she would raise hell when she found out.

“Hey Nat…” Steve coughs awkwardly.

Fresh off a hard mission, covered in scrapes and bruises, and scowl on her face; Natasha Romanoff looked ready to raise all seven layers of hell.

“Someone. Explain.” She asks calmly… too calmly. It unnerves the three men in the worst way possible and Bucky’s explaining the situation before his brain can catch up. Once he’s finished, the woman simply mutters an okay before walking out of the room and leaving the trio speechless.

She returns a minute later in a fresh change of clothes and is stuffing knives in different pockets of her pants.

“What are you doing?” Sam asks, curious and worried at the same time.

“I’m going to fucking kill them.” She announces, making her way to the door. If it were anyone else, Barnes would have thought it was a joke but, he knew Natasha. He knew what happened to people that hurt her family and, even thought he loathed himself for it, he still cared about Claire.

“Natalia.” She stops with a huff when Bucky calls her name. “Please, don’t.”

For once, she doesn’t fight him and she instead takes a seat on the armchair across from him.

“If I ever see her again, I will not hesitate. I mean it Bucky.”

“She doesn’t even know I know yet. Neither of them do. Y/N wants to wait until her divorce papers are ready.” Her green eyes soften at his obvious pain. In all the years they’d known each other, she’d never seen him like this. “Her friends are lawyers and she asked if I wanted to meet them with her tomorrow.”

“I hope you said yes.” To his surprise, its Steve that says it. Out of everyone in this room, he’d have thought Steve would be the one handing out second chances. In a messed-up way, he was glad the courtesy didn’t extend to cheating spouses.

“I did. We’re meeting for breakfast.” He nods, and the three Avengers let out a collective sigh of relief.

“Mr. Barnes.” FRIDAY’s voice echoes in the silent room. “There is a Miss Y/N Voight calling for you. Should I take a message?”

As soon as the AI says your name, his breath catches in his throat and his mind goes straight to the worst-case scenario: Patrick came home and something happened to either you or Laysa.

“No, you can patch her through Fri.”

There’s a shuffle over the speakers before your voice is heard.

“Hello? James?” To his relief, you didn’t sound any more distressed than you were when he left.

“I’m here Y/N. I’ve got Steve, Sam, and Nat here with me. Is everything alright?”

“Oh, hi other Avengers. Yeah, it’s just that I called Matt’s secretary and explained the situation. She told me to bring any official pre-nuptial documents with us tomorrow and figured I should let you know but, I didn’t have your number. Had to call the station to get this one.”

He didn’t like the idea of you calling your husband’s place of work but, you didn’t sound bothered by it and he hopes its because you managed to avoid talking to him directly.

“Секретарь? Я думал, вы сказали, что юристы - ее друзья.” The secretary? I thought you said the lawyers are her friends. Natasha asks in her mother tongue, a habit she and Barnes had gotten into whenever they needed to have a private conversation, and the man shrugs.

“Они мои лучшие друзья и заботятся обо мне.” They're my best friends and, they care about me. You reply without missing a beat, catching everyone in the room off guard. “If I tell them before tomorrow, nothing is stopping them from finding and maiming Pat… my soon-to-be ex-husband. You aren’t the only one with scary friends Barnes.”

Your words were so brazen that Bucky could picture you sitting on the phone with a smirk on your face as clear as day and a grin finds its way onto his face; earning a curious glance from Steve.

“Anyways, I’ve gotta go. Laysa’s fussing.” Sure enough, a sharp cry comes from the speaker. “I’ll see you tomorrow James and, I guess goodnight everyone else? Keep up the good work? Bye.”

When the call ends, everyone’s eyes turn to Bucky and he keeps his head down. It was kind of you to risk a confrontation with your husband to help him get prepared for tomorrow. He couldn’t imagine being kind in a situation like yours. You had a child to worry about through this; you had every right to be bitter.

“Fri. Can you print out-“

“Already on it Mr. Barnes.” The AI announces and, not for the first time, Bucky is grateful for Tony’s stubbornness. If it weren’t for Stark there wouldn’t be any pre-nuptial documents. James had thought it a waste of time when it was first brought up but, it looks like he’d need to thank the billionaire once more for forcing him to sign the papers.

“She sounded oddly cheery for someone who just found out their husband was cheating on them.” Sam frowns, causing Bucky to look at him in confusion.

Did Sam not hear the way your voice cracked when you mentioned calling the station? Could he not tell you had just cried your voice hoarse? Was he oblivious to you attempt of covering up your pain with thinly veiled humor?

No, you were not cheery. You were shattered, just like him but, you were trying your best to seem put together. He could see right through you. His friends though, they didn’t seem as attuned to your sorrow.

“We all process grief differently. For all we know, she’s still in shock.” Steve reasons, ever the mediator.

“She sounds like she has her hands full.” Natasha hums in agreement. “She’s probably focused all of her attention on the baby. I know it helped Laura whenever Clint was away on missions.”

You were coping, in your own way. Barnes decided to take your lead, standing from his seat.

“Heading to bed Buck?”

“Yeah. I’ll see you all in the morning.” He lies before leaving in the direction of his room. He wouldn’t be able to sleep, not with the images of Claire and Patrick burned into his eyelids so, he bypasses his bedroom and makes his way to the gym a floor below. He hated lying to his friends but, they were like yours, they cared about him almost too much. They were always so eager to help and he was grateful for it, really, but sometimes he needed to be alone in order to work through whatever problem he was having. The man liked his solitude.

When Bucky had told Steve he wanted his own apartment, the blonde nearly had a conniption but, he eventually relented and together they had found a place not too far from the compound. Right now, he was missing his little slice of solitude.

Thankfully, the gym is deserted when he arrives and, as he sets up a punching bag, his mind wanders; remembering times when his life wasn’t so damn complicated. Back when he’d spend the afternoon looking down alleys to make sure Steve wasn’t getting his ass handed to him. Back when the most he had to worry about was whether to take Sally or Jane dancing that evening.

He can only stay in that headspace for so long before he’s back to reliving the worst moment of his new life. He had thought he finally got it right with Claire; he used to think she was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, she was smart, a kick-ass agent, she made him feel like he was able to put himself together again with her help. She was too good for him and he used to think it was only him who thought it.

After years of being together, she’d finally thought it too.

A hard jab to the bag slices it open, pouring sand into his sneaker and he almost yells in frustration. Then he remembers you and the way you chucked your phone past his head without so much as a sound. His anger was explosive but, yours? Your anger was silent and seething; dare he say calculating.

He wondered if you’d look as lovely screaming as you did seething before shaking the thought from his head with wide eyes. Whenever he and Claire argued; whether or not she was pretty was the last thing on his mind.

Comparing you to his wife should have been the last thing on his mind but, no matter how hard he tried, your face was the one to pop up when he lost focus. He wasn’t upset by it thought, he’d much rather remember your face instead of Patrick and Claire’s in the throes of passion.

Yeah, he’d much rather remember how nice your smile was as you got your daughter’s bottle ready.

#bucky x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky fanfic

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magneticmage · 3 years

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Quiz Meme; OC-style

I was tagged by @rozhevisny to take this quiz.

I also ended up doing a number of my OCs. They are under the cut for length.

I am tagging @awellboiledicicle @mikkeneko @changeling-fae @higheverweave @yusukesmomjeans @dalishious and @draxen1123 but don't feel pressured to do so if you don't wanna! It's all for fun.

(Inquisitors)

Paeriel Lavellan="You're choking on how much you have to try". Accurate by the time of Inquisition (specifically around Skyhold) as Paeriel very much embodies the virtue of suledin. She can handle the amount she's dealt with but it is still a burden and she worries about how it will affect others if she slips and drops under the weight. She doesn't want more harm to come to innocents and those who are already struggling under their own burdens (mages, dwarves, elves, even the templars to some degree), and yet it is a fight that continues on and on seeming without end. Just as Solas walks his path to break the systems oppressing people, she tries to work within those same systems to better chances for those who need it.

Armashok Adaar="You were meant to". Accurate prior to his joining the Inquisition. He spent so much of his life struggling to find his place as everyone told him what to be; silent, obediant, a weapon to be protected against. He chafed and struggled to find comfort in it and yet he ultimately realized that he was his own person. No one could tell him who and what he was or was meant to be, not even his wife. So he chose for himself; To be Armashok Adaar.

Ransley Trevelyn="This isn't enough for you" Also accurate for pre-Inquisition Ransley, as he balked against his family expectations. They wanted him to marry a nice noblewoman of status and wealth. He courted them but couldn't quite bite the bullet as something about them just lacked....something. Even when he met his lover, he struggled against the fact that they had to be discreet for her reputation as a Knight-Divine. His family demanded he become a Templar, he decided the Seekers would be a better use of his talents. Always when he was told something, his innate ambition would push him for more and better things. While he can give up things as needed, he dislikes it. That last part is something he struggles with-and notably fails during Trespasser-post-Inquisition. This is a trait that Josephine can understand, though like their lover Cassandra, she tempers it in herself and him with patience.

Naranka Cadash="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Pfft. Yeah, this is very much her. She seeks redemption just as badly as Paeriel does for Solas, just as badly as Blackwell-her love interest-does.

(Inner Circle)

Kara Adaar="Because you cannot hold freedom". Very true. She's seen what freedom has cost her parents to give her a better life and plans to make the most of hers. That desire to enjoy life is shared with Sera. The desire to understand the world through the lens of ensuring that freedom for others is something she shares with Dagna.

Emilyse Trevelyan="You swallow pain and fold around it" Yikes. This is accurate to her time in the Circle, however. She spent much of her time trying to be a "good" mage, despite a number of abuses by the Templars and the Chantry. It was only when her brother visited her during his training as a recruit that some of those abuses came to light and she was brought to the Circle in Ostwick, closer to home and with the newly added bribes to ensure her safety, she did much better. However, this newfound life did not for too long as the Rebellion broke out and she was left adrift for a time before making her way with some other refugees to the Conclave at Haven. She was nervous about so many Templars, but eventually found solace and peace with Cullen as they each began to heal over their own traumas of their respective sides, and together as they began a family shortly after Trespasser.

Samrel Lavellan="because you cannot hold freedom" Interesting. He's actually one of my simplest OCs; a simple life with his clan and husband, First to the Keeper and cousin to Paeriel, is all he wants. Unlike some of my other Dalish OCs, he hasn't faced quite the same level of hardship and loss, and though he does mourn the loss of his clan, he seeks to rebuild it alongside his husband and the few survivors that managed to escape the humans' blades. So perhaps that defiance of the losses inflicted harkens back to the Dale's and the elves' refusal to submit to the Alienages, by simply standing up and saying "No, you cannot silence us" is enough? That could be a type of freedom and there is power in that refusal. Thoughts to consider more later.

Pyrmar Cadash="This isn't enough for you". Oh that's interesting. Pyrmar is one of those characters that seems super simple (ex-surfacer Carta bruiser with a notable penchant for leadership as a Champion) and, for the most part, he is. He likes drink and fun as much as any other mercenary like the Chargers. But, like Dorian, he sometimes feels inadequate in some way. As if he is meant for more; to be and do more. Most notably for basic respect and care, something his upbringing in the cutthroat nature of the Carta was missing. Dorian shows him that he is capable of love and being loved and The Iron Bull gives him the respect and belonging he lacked previously. While he can still fall orey to his baser nature at times, his heart as grown much over the years and so it becomes less common to "want more" as he used to.

(Last Court)

Aurore de Serault="Because you have made mistakes you can't swallow" Ooo. She does carry some lingering guilt and grief over her late husband's death at the hands of the Game. She struggles with the Orlesian court at times, and much prefers solitude and peaceful quiet to gossipy ballrooms and noble Lords and ladies demanding a dance, a bonding point for her and her love interests of The Silent Huntsman and the Elegant Abbess. However, it's not that she's unskilled in the Game; in fact, she's quite good at it. She simply prefers simplicity to more complex machinations. All that said, she does regret the ferocity with which she holds grudges; she had gone on to murder the entire families of those individuals responsible for her husband's death.

Marcel de Serault="You swallow pain and fold around it". Hmmm. Not sure of this one. Marcel divorced his wife to pursue a cloistered and scholarly life in pursuit of knowledge (he was once a Chevalier). Eventually he began to crave the adventure of the Game again, which is how he fell for The Wayward Bard and the Dashing Outlaw. Again, not too sure but it's interesting. Perhaps he simply internalized his losses and pain?

(Hawkes)

Knight-Commander Jasper Hawke of Kirkwall="because you've made mistakes you can't swallow" Oh cool! Jasper watches his younger siblings-three of his fellow quadrupled and Carver- go off into the Deep Roads expedition. He made the decision to stay behind to protect Bethany and their mother in case things went south. Despite assurances from his departing siblings, things did go south. After being pissed at Batrand, he sighed and went to work for the Templars. Shortly thereafter, despite his best efforts, Bethany was caught by Templars and taken to the Circle. Jasper did what he could to protect and shield his sister from the worst abuses of the Templars under Meredith's command, no matter the personal costs and enmity it earned him from his siblings and companions. It even ended his relationship with Anders around the beginning of Act 2. After Meredith was defeated, he worked with Cullen to try and reform the Templars and rebuild Kirkwall post-Chantry boom. His efforts were strained once red lyrics began to show up and corrupt his fellow templars. Despite narrowly avoiding being swept into the group while infiltrating it to gather intel, he succeeded in driving them out. When Cullen left for the Inquisition, he stepped up to continue reforming the Templars for protecting the mages. While he originally balked at the pro-mage decisions of the Inquisition, he ultimately agreed that the Chantry had abused all of its charges-mages and templars both. He began to reshape the Templars under his command to fit in line with the changing world; a choice to take lyrium, and a recovery and rehabilitation plan set in stone for all members who wished to leave, new rules and regulations in place to protect the rights and dignity of both mages and Templars, slowly making them a secular force beyond the Chantry but under the control of Vivenne's newly reformed Circle of Magi perhaps. He does what he believes to be right and for the best of his family, even if they dislike his decisions. A trait he no doubt picked up from his mother.

Lord Gray Hawke of House Amell="You swallow pain and fold around it" This is fitting for Lord Amell. While Jasper and Violet always held loft goals to pursue and Skye simply wanted to go and see the world for all it was, Gray preferred to remain at home and tend to their family. He is the one most connected to the Amell legacy rather than the Hawke self-made determination. That's not to say it isn't there; he's more than willing to help others and make something of himself, but it comes back to wanting to appease and help his family in whatever ways he could. He pines for Anders for a great deal of time, but doesn't make a move due to either Jasper dating the mage or simply not wanting to be a rebound for his brother. In the end, however, Anders surprises him (perhaps nudged on by Skye and Violet) by initiating a kiss and the two quickly develop into a stable relationship. He is even willing to leave all he'd built to go on the run with Anders and further aid him in his cause. Gray is just a cutie who wants a simple meal and a nice husband. If he gets to watch Anders shoot lightning at fools, well, who is he to laugh?

Viscountess Skye Hawke="Because you cannot hold freedom". Accurate. Skye loves her freedom. While she is certainly ambitious, it often comes down to more power means more freedom. She rules as Viscountess of Kirkwall for a time until abdicating in favor of Varric so she can pursue Tallis across the seas, but also to simply go back to adventuring and exploring. While she does not care for the Qun and its Qunari, she cares about people and her family most of all. It is one of the few tethers she did not choose but it is the one she keeps above all others. After all, even the Sky must touch the earth at some point just as a Hawk must return to its nest to rest and tend its young.

Champion Violet Hawke of Kirkwall="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow". Fitting given that Violet is both a blood-mage (also a spirit-healer and force-mage) and extremely pro-mage freedom, and her choices often led her to conflict with Jasper due to their views and lives. She has only ever wanted to be free to live her life as she chooses, with is how she fell for Isabela. She fell for Fenris because she's a bleeding heart who wants to help everyone as much as she can. Kirkwall left its mark on her and she's struggling to do better than what she views as a failure due to her diplomatic nature in the name of mage freedom by the time the Inquisition comes around. While just as driven by the cause for equality as Anders, she often privately struggled with her mother's death among the many other revelations and choices of her family, fearing the loss of all she called dear. Luckily Fenris and Isabela returned to her and they made a pact to live well on the seas after everything had settled down and Champion Hawke was no longer needed.

(Awakening)

Senior Warden Dion Caron="This isn't enough for you" Okay. So, Dion joined the Wardens to escape the Templars (p.s. it didn't work) and his adopted sister Victoire-Ainsley was already joining and he had promised to protect her for their parents. He's happily married to Garam and spends much of his time training recruits and fostering camaderie in the ranks of the Wardens. What more could he want? Perhaps it is nothing and the doubt is simply there as is human nature, perhaps he frets about his dwindling time in the world before his Calling, perhaps he does want more. Who can say?

Senior Warden/Warden-Constabke Victoire-Ainsley Caron of Orlais="This isn't enough for you" Pfft. Victoire-Ainsley's ambition to make a name for herself and her family (she came from a long line of Chevaliers) nearly cost her her life and resulted in her father's death. Her mother adopted an orphan boy-Dion-in the hopes it would curb some of her darker tendencies. It partially succeeded. While she did not go as far as she'd once been willing, she still acted ruthlessly and this earned her quite the name in the Game for a time. However, her fall from grace was just as bloody as her rise, and she was only spared by the intervention of the Wardens' Conscription. She lost a great deal and was now forever barred from reclaiming it. She acted out for a time and was surprised when the Wardens allowed-encouraged even-it. However the death of her husband to save them during a nasty skirmish against a powerful broodmother she'd led them against resulted in a mission successful but at a cost she hadn't wanted to pay; only her, Dion, Garam, and I senna made it out alive. Since then, she had been working towards redeeming herself, opening up to the criticism and vulnerability she'd been so afraid of, much like Loghain is when he is sent to Orlais. And so while her pride demands more of her, she focuses instead on what she can provide and tries to bite back the bile this causes. After all, this is for the best and that is enough. Right?

Senior Warden Isenna Andras="You were meant to" Isenna lived first under the Orlesian cruelty in the Alienate and then the Templars' in the Circle. It is no wonder she fights to carve a name for herself in history, to make herself her own, to be what she was never meant to even dream of. She wants to be a hero but struggles against her own inner nature to survive. She is driven by the conflict of selflessness and self-preservation. Perhaps Mhairi's idealism is enough to tip the scales for her.

Senior Warden Garam Kader="Because you have made mistakes you cannot swallow" Accurate. He joined the Wardens after passing off the wrong Carta Boss and then spent years helping Victoire-Ainsley and her brother grow their ambition and then....his unit died beyond the four of them. And all the glamor of the Wardens fell away and he realized just how far some would go and he began to wait for them to step back, hoping they would step back. Victoire-Ainsley and Dion and Isenna did. He did. But the Clarel didn't. He hopes Loughlin will do better as the Warden-Commander of Orlais. He knows he will do better and he knows his husband, Dion, will.

(Wardens)

Warden-Commander Lynera Mahariel of Fereldan="You were meant to" Ouch my heart. Lynera lost Tamlen and never quite recovered. She was forced into a Warden and then into leading the party as the Hero of Fereldan and then into the role of Warden-Commander/Arlessa of Amaranthine and she did it. She took all the pain and hurt and losses over the years, the Taint and its horrors and its strength sapping, the politics and hard decisions; she took it all and she did it. She did what was needed, became what a Grey Warden Commander and hero was meant to be. She can't even say she regrets becoming a Warden anymore as its become so central to her identity now, only mourns the things and people she's lost to get there. I think Sten-excuse me-the Arishok understands this. Perhaps that is why they both hope to never meet on a battlefield unless they are on the same side again.

Warden Isemaya Tabris="You swallow pain and fold around it" Okay that's like SUPER interesting. See, Isemaya learned about the injustices elves face early in life. It cost her her mother's life and very nearly her twin brother's as well, after all. She became a warrior to protect them (her family, her community, her home) and she was good at it. But then she saw a glimpse of a different life with Nelaros, one where she might be happy simply letting someone else deal with all the fighting and clawing and exhaustion. She wanted it, she realized, she wanted it very much. But then she lost him and Shianni was hurt and she was hurt and Vaughn was dead and the humans were so angry. She geared up to protect her people again, to be the brave warrior like her mother before her. And then....Duncan Conscripted her. She was forced from her home, alive and angry and proud, and so she expanded her family to her companions. Then Zevran tried to kill them and they let him live and she watched him like a hawk and saw the same longing for a life, for more in the absence of loss, in him. She helped him heal and learn to live again and he helped her set down her weapons and her anger for a time and then the times became more frequent and they grew closer. She told him she loved him in the brisk Haven air and he gave her a golden earring to match the old and blood-stained wedding band she still wore, and she had found peace. She continued with the Wardens, with helping him take down the Crows, with searching for a cure so they could have more time. She took her pain but instead of weaponizing it like Lynera and others did, she learned to let it go and continue on. She learned to live in spite of, not because of, her pain.

Arcane Advisor Catriona Surana of Fereldan= "Because you have made mistakes you cannot swalllow" Oof. This is definitely Catriona during Origins. Her decisions to betray Jowan, to use blood magic at Ostagar and then to continue to practice and study it despite the stigma it holds, the merging with Compassion to save Cale, to give up her dreams of marriage and freedom and let Alistair marry Anora for the good of Fereldan and again when Leliana went on to become the Left Hand of the Divine and then again as the Divine Victoria...she makes a lot of mistakes and the consequences haunt her for a very long time. While she does manage to find some good in them, or at least simply makes peace with them, they still color how she becomes in 2 and Inquisition and beyond.

Warden Cale Amell=

Teryn Fion Cousland of Gwaren=

Paragon Prince Barran Aeducan=

Warden Paragon Tatha Brosca=

(Origins)

First/Keeper Vireth Mahariel=

"Dark Wolf" Elthorn Tabris=

"Stormcaller" Alaros Surana=

Lord Azul Amell=

Lady "Nightshade" Raven Amell=

Lord Carmine Amell=

Lord Reed Amell=

Lady Marigold Amell=

Captain "Highever Spitfire" Aelynne Cousland=

Princess and Orzammar Commander Valda Aeducan=

(Canon Solo Shepard)

Commander and Spectre Annette Shepard=

(The Sibling Shepards Canon)

Spectre Riley Shepard=

Spectre/XO Roscoe "Ros" Shepard=

Spectre/Commander Joanna "Jo" Shepard=

(Shepard Cousins)

Angelus "Angel" Shepard=

Elliot "El" Shepard=

Jaden "Jay" Shepard=

Alexandra "Alex" Shepard=

Kristopher "Kris" Shepard=

Clover "Clove" Shepard=

(Starship Ryders Canon)

Pathfinder Lucas "Luke" Ryder=

Pathfinder Rebecca "Becca" Ryder=

Pathfinder Shiloh "Shy" Ryder=

Pathfinder Evander "Evan" Ryder=

Pathfinder Asher "Ash" Ryder=

(Baldur's Gate)

Cei Gloomdraft=

Faenerys Elendir=

"Sable Shades" Risaeder Rosandoral=

Saga "Muse" Musehart=

Lyr(e/a/an) Lovemoor=

Rune Mistsea=

Lucine Mistsea=

Roan Roarke=

#my ocs stuff #my baldur's gate 3 ocs #my Shepards #Sibling Shepards #My Dragon Age OCs #My Wardens #My Origins #My Hawkes #My Marquises #My Inquisitiors #My Inner Circles #My Team Tadpole

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the-irish-mayhem · 4 years

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Fosterson Fic Rec Masterlist: Oneshots

The Main Reclist has been split to fix the links that tumblr decided to break if there were too many of them in a single post. I’ll be keeping the main reclist updated (even if the links appear broken) as well as maintaining this list and the list for multichapters.

I need help expanding this list! If you have any favorites or fics of your own of your own you don’t see included in this list and you’d like to submit for consideration, please drop me a line.

List updated April 2020. New additions marked with **

Updated during this wild quarantined time, which should serve as a reminder to everyone to APPRECIATE YOUR CONTENT CREATORS! Leave all the comments and kudos to show our love for everything they do. Big thanks to everyone who recommended and/or created content for this amazing ship.

Rated G/K-K+

**Promise by igi_pigi: Thor visits Jane to say goodbye before he leaves for Asgard. Rec: Bittersweet but lovely post-AOU, semi AU pre-Ragnarok. | 1.1k

**Spooky Nights by igi_pigi: "So what is it about?" Thor asks. "Or are we to go in uninformed?"Jane's eyes instinctively flick towards the blank tv screen. Darcy was insistent about it being a horror movie this time - as they serve as "perfect romance fodder", according to the maniac. Jane has decided to go with the recent one, 'The Conjuring'. [Set a few months after Thor2] Rec: Just sweet, dumb, wonderful fluff. Not an ounce of angst to be found. Also Thor learning about Earth is always sweeeeet. | 3.2k

**Stars and Solitude by igi_pigi: It's Jane's first night in Thor's home, however unusual the circumstances. He wishes to show her somewhere. She thinks it's his room. [Set during Thor2] Rec: A nice lil add on, Thor inviting Jane further into his life. | 3.3k

**Can’t Go Back the Same Way You Came by gumbridge: Loki lets go. This is what happens after. (post-film; basically a fixit fic.) Rec: This is pretty Loki-centric, but Jane is fabulously written, the family unit that Loki gets inducted into makes me very happy, and the fosterson is understated but so important and wonderful. | 20k

**spring will come by LadyCharity: As if grieving over the death of her husband wasn't hard enough, Jane has to deal with Thor's angry, bitter, emotionally shot little brother. Rec: This is literally all pain but god it is so good. You can feel the love binding Jane and Loki and Thor and it is so, so well written. Holy shit. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 12k

the universe in your hand by amonkeysue: For the free day of Fosterson Week 2019, Thor's finally taking the right chance to propose to Jane. Rec: an adorable little bite-sized proposal fic. | <1k

Who Lives, Who Dies by MissChrisDaae: When the dust settles, who is left? Rec: Post-Infinity War, semi-kidfic. Pretty cute, and brings Jane into the story like she should’ve been. | 1.2k

Morning by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane's morning is interrupted by their kids. Rec: Fluffy fluffy FLUFFY Jane and Thor with a whole gaggle of children. | <1k

Trending by MissChrisDaae: Jane and Darcy's work session gets a little derailed. Rec: For the Social Media day of Fosterson Week, a fluffy and silly bit, and feeds into the 2012 Avengers Fic nostalgia. | <1k

ever on and on by often_adamanta: Darcy has to correct three separate people at the reception about their relationship, not younger cousin or sister, but college professor and boss and finally best friend. Jane thinks about their surprise, the second glances they give her, and wonders. Rec: Jane deals with the implications of immortality. Her friendship with Darcy is so potent and real in this. | 3k

Before the Thunder Shook Us by niobium: #6, “Is there a reason you’re naked in my bed?” #14, “Hey, I’m with you, okay? Always.” Rec: This is such a wonderful canon-insertion/canon divergence. Just enough fluff and bittersweetness to seem real. | 1k

Private Jokes by MissChrisDaae: Before his return to Asgard, Thor and Jane have a talk. Two years later, Thor misses a chance and Jane has to carry on. Rec: An AOU coda and a Ragnarok fix-it all in one. Feisty Jane and apologetic Thor. My bbs. | 1k

On the Physics of Magical Space Hammers by shinyopals: ‘So what does it mean to be “Worthy”?’ Jane asked. Jane doesn't mind sharing her life with Mjolnir. She just wishes she understood it a bit better. Rec: We’ve all wondered about Mjolnir and worthiness. Jane finally takes the initiative to find out with amazing results. | 4k

Fives Times Jane and Thor Broke Up and One Time They Didn’t by shinyopals: I didn’t know you were in the country, Jane,’ said Jane's grandmother. ‘Of course, nobody tells me anything.’ ‘It’s just a very last minute thing,’ said Jane, which Thor knew to be a lie. ‘I only arrived yesterday-’ another lie, ‘and I’m just on the way to work and thought I’d stop by and see Mom.’ This too was not true. ‘This is my friend Thor,’ she added, almost casually. ‘He’s been helping me with some work so we’re driving into the university together.’ This seemed the most flagrant of all the lies, but Thor decided not to let it show. It's not always convenient to be a relationship, so sometimes Jane and Thor have to make sacrifices. Rec: A giant SUCK ON THIS FEIGE that takes the “Jane and Thor break up” concept to the best possible places. | 12k

Hours Long and Short by shinyopals: The first night, Thor does not sleep. (Written for a post-TDW prompt for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: A really wonderful slice of life fic post-TDW. Deals with their trauma so wonderfully, and includes some lovely soft moments. | 4k

#7Days7Hobbies by shinyopals: Thor wants to try out some of Midgard's finest hobbies and turns to Twitter for suggestions. Jane isn't really sure how this is now her life. (Prompt for Day 4: Domestic, for Fosterson Week 2017.) Rec: One of my favorite things that’s ever been submitted for Fosterson Week. I love reading about Thor fully embracing Earth customs, particularly social media, which opal KNOWS is one of my weaknesses. | 5k

A Question of Honor by shinyopals: ‘Paintball?’ said Steve. ‘We could do… that…’ ‘What is that?’ asked Thor. He nuzzled into Jane’s hair. His mead-breath was giving her a headache. ‘It’s a thing- a game… thing. With paint.’ ‘Rogers, stop explaining stuff to Thor, you’re embarrassing me.’ Tony’s voice was remarkably coherent. Must have been drinking sensibly. Bastard. When it comes to deciding whether Earth or Asgard has better warriors, the stakes are high, and Jane is wishing she'd kept her big mouth shut. Rec: TEAM BUILDING EXERCISES FOR THE WIN. | 8k

The Gift Horse by fartherfaster: Sam and Darcy are formally introduced for the first time. Sam says “formally” with some flexibility. And a couch. A couch and a great deal of flexibility. Nevermind, he’s said enough. They met, is what he’s trying to say. Or, Sam's early days with the whole gang. Rec: Mostly a teamfic from Sam Wilson’s POV, which is awesome because how often do you see that. Fosterson is mostly background, but it made me smile so much. | 3k

on the verge of understanding something extraordinary by dirgewithoutmusic: “Jane, you’re an astrophysicist, not a storm chaser,” said Erik Selvig, and he was wrong. She was just an astrophysicist too. (A Jane Foster character study) Rec: I’m relatively certain I read this before and loved it, only it somehow didn’t make the reclist. An amazing, touching, wonderful, stunning portrait of Jane Foster. | 9k

starlight in her eyes by jdphoenix: “You,” she says, voice strong with accusation. “You’re the one who attacked me!” Thor really must laugh at that. “You are the one who attacked me. Or is it considered polite among stars to crash into one another?” Rec: A really awesome take on a Stardust fusion AU. Full of inquisitive Jane and cocky Thor. It gave me really hard vibes from the first Thor film. | 1.2k

a true lady of Asgard by jdphoenix: It's not uncommon for Jane to fall asleep working when she's chasing a new theory or hunting down evidence but the middle of a battle for the future of Asgard is not the time. Rec: Jane becoming a fixture of sorts in Asgard is one of my kinks. Also Jane being friends with Thor’s friends and the people of Asgard. Kink. | 3.5k

Afterwit by RC_McLachlan: Good with patients, bad with relationships. That's what she told Thor before she ripped the name tag from the shirt in his hands and crumbled it in her palm, relishing the way the sticky back clung to her skin before she threw it in the waste bin. She'd never been so right in her life up to that point—the rightest she's ever been was when she decided to offer the crazy blond guy a ride to his mysterious non-satellite in the desert. Or, the one in which Jane and Thor run into Donald Blake. Rec: I am such a sucker for the “running into the shitty ex with the New and Improved Partner” trope and this is that. All of that to such a wonderful degree. | 2.7k

drabbles by freshexes: Rec: Some really fantastic little bits of prose. Great voices of Thor and Jane. Some fluffies, some angst. | 1k

The Good Times are Killing Me by alwaysaprilia: Rec: Modern royals AU. Jane and Thor are perfect in this. The dialogue is sublime, and the interactions made me squee really hardcore. I only wish there was more. | 3.6k

College AU by anthropologicalhands: Rec: It’s kinda more meta/heacanon, but it’s really adorable. | 1k

all’s fair (in love and war) by sweetwatersong: This is what you fight for. This is what you yearn to feel: this moment, this passing of every second, this rush of life and the indomitable strength of the present. Thor is a warrior, born and bred, and he is glad of any battle - and yet, as with all things, even this can change. Rec: A Thor introspect and a really well done second person perspective. | 1k

Five Times Thor Gets His Shirt Off FOR GREAT JUSTICE And One Time He Doesn’t by shinyopals: Sometimes Thor’s armour is more useful when not being worn by him. He definitely doesn’t end up in these situations on purpose. Rec: Please bury me in every single five times fic shinyopals has written. This one might be my absolute favorite. So many fantastic interactions for Thor, not just with Fosterson (which is BEYOND perfect), but the whole team. Plus: naked Thor fighting bad guys in an apron. Also the SamSteve is so strong and I’m in love. | 9.8k

A Discussion of Hypotheticals by shinyopals: Jane and Thor talk about their future. Hypothetically. Rec: I am so glad we’ve made Fosterson Week a thing because this fic is WONDERFUL. Great communication makes me weak, and also so many squee-worthy moments. | 5k

Jane Foster Versus the Internet. Or: Five Times Jane Allegedly Dated An Avenger And One Time She Apparently Did Not by shinyopals: Jane discovers that the internet is The Worst. Rec: It’s the thing I loved so much I made graphics for it because it’s so good. Jane’s interactions with all the Avengers are delightful, not to mention her steady relationship with Thor that is so grounded and real. It’s also freaking hilarious. | 10.4k

Untitled by polyamoryavengers: Rec: Angst and fluff and Jane comforting Thor. *cartwheels into the sun* | 1k

Sexiest ‘Something’ Alive by Niobium: Tony is bound and determined to make sure a human is awarded the title of Sexiest Man Alive (he even has a solid candidate in mind); Jane just wants media outlets to get their science right. Rec: This is absolutely fantastic. Just the right kind of blend of humor, sweetness, and meta criticism ever. | 7.5k

The Hours Filled by websandwhiskers: Ritual and comradery are basic human needs. Rec: Focus on Jane, not a ton of Thor, but pregnant Jane is always a delight. | 1.7k

First Dates? by hariboo: Jane’s not really sure what her and Thor’s first date is? The party or the barbecue? In end does it matter? Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. | 1.4k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Of Car Crashes and Coffee by hariboo: “you bumped my car and I’m so piss- oh wow no you’re hot let’s go for a coffee” au prompt. Exactly what it says on the tin. Rec: This made me giggle. Super duper cute. | 1.3k

Tactile Perception by RC_McLachlan: “The day I met you, I knew you would see me.” Her hands find his face, sliding over his jaw, his cheeks, and she brings their foreheads together. “The day I met you, I hit you with my car. Twice.” Rec: *dies quietly* Teasing and cute story telling and just so many good things. | 2k

Clarke’s Third Law by shinyopals: “Of all the people to knock down the stairs, she would pick the practically-seven-foot-tall son of the Minister for Magic who just happens to be the Gryffindor Quidditch Captain.” Jane’s just trying to read every single book in the Hogwarts library in between classes, and she’s not quite sure how Thor happened to her. Rec: I never read Harry Potter but damn it this makes me want to. I just love this. So much. I don’t know how but it happened. I actually really wish there was more? | 3.8k

The Most Daring Prophecies–Dr Jane Foster at TED Talk by Rozilla: A transcript of Jane giving a TED Talk on her experiences of crossing the cosmos, Asgard and her hopes for the future of interstellar travel - as reported on WHIH. Rec: I can’t tell you how badly I wanted this to be real. Fosterson is mentioned a bit, and it makes me smile a lot. | 5.1k

Paradigm Shift by jdphoenix: “Jane’s implementing a ‘new organizational paradigm.’ She does this like once a year, usually when she’s extra stressed. Like after that time your brother messed up NYC.” Rec: cute domestics plus Jane is worthy. | 1.5k

Raging Storm by jdphoenix: Thor knows the moment he touches the hammer that it is not Mjolnir. Rec: A brilliant continuation of Paradigm Shift (above, previously recced) wherein Jane bests Loki and is worthy, plus Jane talking down berserker!Thor. So many of my Fosterson hot buttons. | 4k

Overlap by littlestardust: A moment between Thor and Jane. Alternative summary: Thor is respectful of Jane’s life choices, and also there is cuddling. Rec: Teeny tiny fic, but super cute. | <1k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane/Darcy centric with lots of talk about fosterson and a kinda sweet moment at the end. | 1k

untitled by ifilovedyouless: jane/thor, modern royals. Rec: Oh my god, the sweetness overload was too much. Also YAS Thor in military uniform. | 1k

Fosterson - dancing by batsonthebrain: Rec: Introspective, sweet, and with a heavy dose of mutual respect. | <1k

Unplanned by hariboo: The first person to hear Jane is pregnant isn’t Thor. It should be, but extenuating circumstances. This happens a lot when it comes to living in Stark Tower. Rec: Very much toeing the crack line. Baby!fic, obviously, plus fabulous Clint, and a semi?redeemed Loki. | 1.2k

clash of the (scientific) titans by anthropologicalhands: Thor brings Tony to meet Jane. Thor admits he probably could have thought it through a little better. Rec: this fic always makes me giggle. Fosterson is mostly background, but the interactions between everyone makes this worth it. | 1k

Through Doors by nayanroo: The Jedi Order knows a good team when they see it, but unfortunately even the best-planned missions always have something go hilariously wrong. That’s when the true strength of any bond is shown. Rec: A Star Wars fusion is always a good idea. The way Jane and Thor play off each other and their bond through the Force is lovely. | 4k

Straight On 'Til Morning by arsenicarcher: Thor and Jane are having a baby. Tony’s conflicted about the whole thing. Rec: Kinda Tony-centric, but I’m always up for a fosterson baby. | 4.4k

hard to keep the rainclouds out by veliseraptor: Rec: A unique view on Thor’s grief and Jane’s struggle to be there for him. Very lovely, very angsty. | 2.1k

Perils of an RPF Life by hariboo: Look, it isn’t that she isn’t excited for Jane, sure she is. But Darcy wonders if Jane ever thinks about that. The fact she’s dating the sexiest E.T. ever. Rec: Darcy’s voice in this is hilarious and touching all at once. Jane and Thor’s caring for each other is so clear and endearing I audibly squeed a few times. | 2k

amazed & confused by tashlae: Dating an alien/god/man who fell from the sky isn’t something to take lightly. Rec: Jane and Darcy friendship is a lot of fun. Jane’s pondering of their relationship seems very characteristic of her. | 1k

On The Unsubtle Nature of Fish Ties by Niobium: Fancy clothes shopping for your alien boyfriend should be easier than this. Or, how Thor got his red velvet jacket. Rec: Fosterson is mostly background, but cute Jane/Darcy/Pepper interaction. | 3.3k

Be Safe by MissChrisDaae: Thor and Jane have a contingency plan for emergencies. Rec: Speculation/AU for Age of Ultron. Baby!fic, and is just so damn cute. | <1k

It All Happens Here by MissChrisDaae: Her very first year of teaching, Jane Foster gets an unusual bonus in the form of one of her students’ extremely attractive father. Single dad and his daughter’s kindergarten teacher au. Rec: super fluffy and just adorable. | 7.5k

Remembrance by Are_you_ever_not_going_to_fall_for_that: Thor and Jane take a walk and come across something that sparks memories. Post The Dark World. Rec: Jane and Thor talk about Loki, and the lack of heavy angst is refreshing. | <1k

Traffic jam by kes: When you’ve been fighting omnicidal aliens and the bureaucracy, a getaway is in order. Unfortunately, flying from A to B isn’t always possible… Rec: domestics. cute domestics EVERYWHERE. | <1k

nothing is ever convenient (except to make things uncomfortable) by anthropologicalhands: After Thor returns, there is still the matter of responding to Richard. Rec: The awkwardness of dealing with Richard made me smile. A very smile inducing fic. | 1.3k

Jane on Top by Rozilla: Jane Foster is asked to lecture at the SHIELD Academy, but she feels her old anxieties and worries begin to creep in- but it’s okay. Darcy has her back, not to mention it appears she has a fan club at the Science and Tech Division of the SHIELD Academy! Rec: An unapologetic Jane-fest, which is my favorite kind of party. Fosterson is background, but very relevant. Darcy is a cool friend. | 4.1k

leave this star crossed world behind by anthropologicalhands: Sif visits Jane with an offering. Rec: Jane/ Sif friendship, and they talk about immortality. Great interactions and insights on fosterson. | 2k

Measured Uncertainties by plushbug: Gap-filler, applying to the 2011 Thor movie. A shot at what might have gone missing from the rooftop scene between Thor and Jane Foster, after his 'rescue’ from the SHIELD base. Fits between “…and Asgard. That’s where I come from.” and “Thank you, Jane." Rec: A good fill for the movies, explains some comic-verse continuties. Curious Jane is a lovely person, and Thor relishes in giving her knowledge. | 4k

halfway between the gutter and the stars by verity: Thor pulls his phone out of his pocket and lifts it above them to capture a picture of the moment, their hair lit by the sun, Jane’s soft smile next to his beaming grin. The Rise filter suits the image perfectly. “I shall title this 'THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE,’” Thor says, typing carefully on the touchscreen. “With the small image of your planet, flanked by sparkling stars." "Well, we abandoned a geocentric model of the galaxy hundreds of years ago,” says Jane. "'THE CENTER OF MY UNIVERSE,’“ Thor says. He amends his caption and selects the options to crosspost from Instagram to Twitter and Facebook. Rec: Okay I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE this. So much. I love the world-building that Avengers + social media allows for. Also, cute Thor and Jane and team stuff plus Neil Degrasse Tyson and George Takei. So much good stuff. | 2.2k

Catalysts by Niobium: Meeting people winds up being a catalyzing event in Jane Foster’s life more often than not. Rec: Well-written Jane, and super supportive boyfriend Thor. I love it when he treats her like a genius. | 2.1k

The Reconstruction of the Mind by Niobium: Jane Foster’s introduction to astronomy doesn’t start with a backyard telescope or a shooting star or the arm of the Milky Way strewn across the nighttime sky, but with an Alexandrine woman named Hypatia. Rec: Jane-centric, and very well done, as per usual with this author. Fosterson is more background, but they have some lovely moments. | 4.6k

Asgardian Cautionary Tales for Young Maidens by Niobium: Jane discovers that Asgardian love stories aren’t exactly romcoms. Rec: Jane and Thor sharing love stories. I audibly squeaked at their cuteness. | 2.3k

the new millennia by hoosierbitch: Thor’s life was measured in centuries, not days. Rec: Post-Dark World, very Thor oriented and introspective. Jane helps him through his grief over Loki. Angst on angst. | 1.1k

the drumming inside her by hariboo: she can feel everyone looking at her, waiting for her to break or give up. they don’t understand. she made a promise too. Rec: oh my god Jane being determined, Thor pining a bit, Heimdall being awesome, and a super sweet reunion. | 1.3k

Starchild by empyrean: One night Jane teaches Thor the basics of Western astronomy, and Thor tries to describe Asgard. Then the Bifröst breaks, and Jane isn’t having that. Rec: Jane and Thor bond over the stars, and Jane doesn’t take it sitting down when the Bifrost breaks. Love the simplicity and the power in this. | 1k

There by Barkour: Jane has found Thor and in the finding, she has gone somewhere she’d never dreamed she’d see. Rec: Jane geeking out over Asgard, plus some really cute banter, and Thor being a gent as always. | 1.9k

Numbers and Lines by Sheeana: Jane Foster visits Avengers headquarters to help install a program she designed, and gets caught up in helping with their latest problem. Rec: Jane and Natasha get some great action together, and the Fosterson is handled well. | 4.9k

Important Meals of the Day by hariboo: or alternatively: Five Breakfasts With Jane and Thor and them feeding their family and friends. Which sometimes lately seem to be the same thing. Rec: domestics! Fluff that makes me want to stay there forever! I love this author’s way of writing fosterson. Also Darcy is so great in this. | 6.2k

Fire in the East by Maat: He finds that there are sweeter things than mead and glory and the fierce bright colors and rich textures of Asgard. Rec: Best Thor-being-on-Earth-longer fic that I’ve read. Short, poignant, sweet, and painful. This is beautifully written and left me wishing this was how the canon story could have gone down. | 1.1k

Few So Generous by galaxysoup: After Odin falls into the Odinsleep, Frigga takes up her husband’s spear and the rule of Asgard. Rec: Jane and Thor from an outside perspective, and a different version of events. Though the focus is not on fosterson outright, it is still a very good fic. | 2.7k

we fall like stars by jadeddiva: All that is left of him now is the extra chair pulled up to her makeshift fire pit, which she never sits in and hasn’t had the heart to move. Jane, and the search for Thor and a greater understanding of herself. Rec: A character study of Jane and how Thor affected her life. Lovely and poignant. Fluid writing style. | 3.1k

Not "Functional” or “Elegant” by Niobium: Jane Foster has worked some bad jobs in her career; working with Stark Industries’ R&D is a vast improvement. Rec: Jane-centric, and gives her a great backstory. She and Thor are adorable as always. The author clearly respects Jane as a scientist, so that shows through a lot, which is amazing. | 1.6k

Jane Foster’s High School Reunion by Niobium: Jane Foster has a high school reunion to go to. Rec: Jane and Thor are adorable. Thor is a gentleman, and Jane gets to laugh in the face of a jerk. Very satisfying. | 5k

Nature and Nurture by nayanroo: What’s better than solving a physics problem that may well get you another Nobel Prize nomination? Having a baby on the same day. Rec: Part of an amazing series (full rec with multichapter fics below) but can be read as a standalone. Featuring pregnant!Jane and adorable and far-too-accurate expectantfather!Thor. The fluff is lovely. Features all of the Avengers with some lovely domestics. | 7.4k | Part of in progress series, The Kingsverse

don’t we all want happy endings? by hariboo: Thor is thinking about Jane, Steve cares (because Steve has Feelings about Lost Lady Loves*), and in the end it’s a team effort. Rec: We get the closure on Thor contacting Jane after the events in New York. Sweet and painful and just lovely. | 3.4k

Legacy by me: A generation later, a budding social scientist tries to figure out Jane and Thor. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. Both Jane and Thor have passed away in this fic. | 2k

Rated T

**Heed the Signs by igi_pigi: Thor wakes up from a nightmare. Is it just a dream, or something more? [Post Thor2, Pre Thor3.] Rec: A heavy, meaningful setup to a Thor 3 that never was. | 4.8k

**Heartless by igi_pigi: Everything reminds her of him, it's funny. Wherever she looks, whatever she thinks of, usually and especially to get her mind off him, will eventually lead to him. [Set the night before Jane's date with Richard in Thor2.] For Day 6 of Fosterson Week - 'things that make you think of them' Rec: A really interesting and fabulous rumination from Jane about Thor’s impact on her life. | 1.4k

**Her Healing Touch by igi_pigi: Jane doesn't really realise that the Aesir are a bit relaxed when it comes to physical hurt. And freaks out over what Thor thinks are just petty bruises of battle. Ending with a little confession from Thor. [Set after Thor2] Rec: A neat take on Asgardian culture, love the way Jane’s care connected to Thor’s past. | 2.5k

**Qeryana by Domenika Marzione (domarzione): Thor and his efforts to live on Midgard, as opposed to just defending it. Rec: Thor’s visceral struggle of living in a culture not his own, but is ultimately still hopeful and positive. | 3k

**First and Foremost, Red by RC_McLachlan: There's a reason Jane and Thor break up. It's not a great one but it's the right one. In the year that follows, Jane carries on, doesn't win a Nobel Prize, defeats Thanos and saves the universe, and finally allows herself to be a little selfish. Rec: YAAAAAS I want ALL the Jane Saves Everything in Infinity War/Endgame fic. ALL OF IT. It’s so satisfying and good. | 9.7k

**Gangráðr, Faðmbyggvir Friggjar by tsukinofaerii: Less than a week before her wedding, Frigga warns Jane of ancient Asgardian rituals she and Thor must undergo before her marriage ceremony. Jane and Thor call on their friends for help as they face what might be the challenge of their lives. Rec: Just an absolute fucking delight from start to finish. Hilarious and amazing. Absolutely the best of the 2012-era Avengers fics. | 19.1k

The Courage of Stars by always_a_queen: Half the universe turns to dust. Thor goes to find the one person who is his whole universe. Thor/Jane Post-Infinity War and during/after Endgame. Spoilers for both movies and Ragnarok. Rec: god this is so heartbreakingly perfect. A wonderful fix it that gives a perfect little taste of what we might’ve had if Jane had been rightfully included in these movies. Jane does pass away at the end of the fic. | Content Warning: Major Character Death | 4.3k

Family Values by shinyopals: ‘It would have been kinder to leave me dead,’ Loki informs her one day. Jane Foster, who’s just revoltingly kissed Thor goodbye, told him she loves him, and called him a disturbing pet name, snorts derisively. ‘He brought you lunch; quit whining,’ she says. Loki isn't sure how he feels about his family, these days. Rec: The best take on Loki ever. His relationship with Jane is fabulous, and the interplay between him, Thor, and Jane is AMAZING. What a freakin treat this fic is. Post-Infinity War AU. | 3k

The Second Law of Thermodynamics by shinyopals: ‘What have you done?’ he asks. He still attempts to sound grave, but with Jane it is hard not to give into smiles.‘Done? I haven’t done, well. I mean. I have done some things. But it’s not bad. I was just curious! And nobody stopped me. I mean, they even welcomed me. So. I didn’t do-’‘Jane,’ he interrupts, laughing and leaning down to plant a kiss on her mouth. ‘You are absurd. I missed you. Tell me.’ Rec: Pardon me while I try to physically scream this fic into existence. It’s perfect. Jane loves science, and Thor loves Jane. Post-Thor 2. | 1.8k

Storm Warning by shinyopals: Then he strides to her and presses a kiss to her lips, taking her face in his hands as he does and holding her close. ‘You planned this?’ he asks. ‘Your morning’s work was not astrophysics, then?’She gives a guilty smile. ‘I wanted to, you know, surprise you.’ Thor gets ~romanced. He kinda likes it. Rec: GOD THE FLUFF. THE. FLUFF. PURE AND GOOD. | 3k

Sakaar by MissChrisDaae: Jane's been stuck on Sakaar for a year and a half. So Asgardians are a welcome sight. Rec: A really original way to get Jane involved in Ragnarok. Jane + science for the win. | 1.3k

Lab by MissChrisDaae: Thor likes spoiling Jane. Rec: For the Jane on Asgard day of Fosterson Week, a short and sweet lil tidbit! | <1k

Domesticity by MissChrisDaae: Little moments around Avengers Tower. Rec: I literally gasped in delight with how much this made me nostalgic for the fluffy Avengers Living in the Tower fics of 2012. | <1k

The Prince(ss) and Me by asoulofstars, MissChrisDaae: Prince Thor of Asgard just wants a little time to feel normal before he has to marry the mysterious Princess Jana of Ameos. So, he runs away from home and enrolls at Harvard University as Donald Blake, where he meets Jane Foster. Jane is clever, kind, and everything he wants, but can never have.Princess Jana of Ameos has spent her whole life studying incognito, getting the best global education possible under the alias of Jane Foster and trying not to think about romance, or the fiancé waiting for her back in Europe. Then Don Blake comes along and throws that plan out the window. Rec: A funky Modern Royals AU. Charming in some nice ways, and I like the slow-building tension. | 17k

Misunderstandings by writerblocked: She looks up at Thor, who grins warmly at her, and looks at their surroundings again. “This isn’t my apartment,” she says. Thor’s grin grows wider. “I know,” he says back. Rec: Newlywed!Fosterson fluff. | 1.8k

Turtures in Aeternum by shinyopals: ‘Legend tells that some unlikely souls are known to pause in their work for reasons of leisure,’ deadpans Thor. ‘History does not say what trials they faced.’ Asgardian science is giving Jane a headache. Thor persuades her to take a break to see some of the sights with him. Rec: Asgardian worldbuilding (literally) via Fosterson field trip. I love everything in this. | 5.5k

Five Times the Bad Guys Interrupted Thor and Jane's Date Night and One Time Tony Freaking Wishes They Had by shinyopals: ‘I have told Steve,’ Thor says to Tony as he’s leaving to go back to his rooms, ‘but I thought I should tell you also. Jane and I plan to institute the ritual of ‘Date Night’.’ As always, Thor sounds like someone’s severely uncool father trying to be hip when he uses any slang invented since the Civil War. Tony's been an Avenger long enough to avoid deliberately tempting fate, even if he doesn't actually believe in fate. The universe is just plain cruel. That's why he knows to be prepared for the worst Hydra can throw at them whenever Thor and Jane make evening plans. Rec: IT’S SO FUDGING CUTE. I CAN’T. IT’S CUTE AND HILARIOUS AND PERFECT AS ALWAYS. | 4.7k

Unexpected Arrival by shinyopals: ‘Jane-’ Thor cut himself off, opening and closing his mouth without managing words. Her name on his lips sounded so familiar; warm and deep and like nothing else mattered. An undercurrent of nerves there that she could still hear after all this time, that she didn’t think anyone else would be able to. She wanted to run to him, bury her face in his neck and jump back in time. Back before the break up - not enough time for each other with the universe in peril. Back before the baby. The baby she still sometimes wondered if she should have terminated to save them both this moment. Rec: The angsty and painfully yearning babyfic that you never knew you needed. | 2k

Steadfast as the Stars Above by jdphoenix: It was not meant to be like this. With him so small and weak, fighting every second to find purchase on a tiny world that spins faster than he can fathom. He wanted to be strong for her. Rec: A fabulous use of the Soulmate AU that completely slots itself perfectly into canon. | 8.3k

too poor for silver, i have a copper tongue by venndaai: “Maybe you don't have the perfect words all the time but, you always have something to say, right? You never have to, have to stop and think about it, and you never stumble over your words or anything.” He squinted at her. “I thought such things simply aspects of Midgardian speech, which you know I am not well versed in.” Jane sighed. “They're not supposed to be.” Rec: A story featuring an explicitly autistic Jane Foster. So wonderfully done. Full of empathy and love and kindness and warmth. | 1.3k

Gift by spikewriter: Jane looked at the brightly colored rug on the floor of the farmhouse in the Hudson Valley they were still moving into. “I like it,” she admitted with a bit more enthusiasm, picturing how her six-year-old self would have run screaming around the room in glee at such a gift. Rec: Some post-TDW fluff with bonus Darcy inclusion. | 1.5k

to candle incandescent as you pass by sweetwatersong: The legacy of King Tristan and the Star Queen Yvaine is not a mere tale in Stormhold, a fantastical portion of the kingdom's history. It lives and breathes in the blood of their descendants, in their long lives and graceful aging, in the ruling King Odin and his son, the Crown Prince Thor… Rec: A Stardust/Huntsman/Thor fusion that isn’t so much a full fic as it is, as the author describes, “a sketch.” Still a really lovely read, a great blend of the films. | 5k

Raiment of The Gods by randomcelt: They say the clothes make the man ... or the god. But sometimes, they do the most for his friends. (Or, a tale of all the times someone else wore Thor's clothes and the adventures necessitating such a development.) Rec: A great Thor character piece. A heavy emphasis on Thor + the team which I love. Runs you through the full gamut of emotions in the best way. | 10k

How to Quantify by Rozilla: It turns out Jane has a personal top ten list of favourite equations - and a nice expanse of hot Norse God to write them on. Rec: Super sweet and also contains the phrase ‘who said science never got you laid’ so. Yep. | 2k

this new bravery by hoosierbitch: For alfadorisawesome, who requested Thor/Jane “about to hook up with someone who doesn’t know.” This is my favorite piece so far. <3 Rec: Incredibly well done Trans Jane Foster. I am such a sucker for open lines of communication between partners, and that’s exactly what this is. Thor is incredibly sweet, and this story establishes his very nonbinary opinions on gender which I LOVE, but he still makes an effort to understand Jane’s experience. I love this fic so much. | 1k

The Hammer and the Ice by grav_ity: In the course of her short and mortal life, the heart of Jane Foster has been twice touched by the sons of Asgard. Rec: I adore AUs where Jane was in the Avengers. This is a short flashfic, but really lovely. | 1k

A Royal Wedding by MissChrisDaae and Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: After three years, ten months, an alien invasion, a cosmic event, and a baby, Thor and Jane finally make it to the altar. Rec: Ridiculously cute fluffies. | 7.5k | Part of the Convergence series

The Thunder God Job by fuzzy_paint: Jane and Thor are thieves. Rec: Oh lawd, the AU I never knew I needed. Beautiful characterization with a rich world they’re placed in. I only wish it was 200 chapters. | 16.2k

there was a star danced by tosca1390: This is the familiar rhythm of her days; the coffee shop until one pm, five days a week, then class and the lab, then home or the library. Here, in her last year with a future dark ahead of her, she doesn’t see anything to change her ways. Jane and Thor, meeting at a coffee shop. Rec: College/Coffee Shop AU. Bless the AU gods. Sly little Shakespeare references. Thor and Jane being cute, sweet idiots. | 6.2k

Proximity Alarm by fayedartmouth: Thor comes back to Earth. Jane thinks it’s great. Except all the times it isn’t. Rec: It’s a great writing style. Jane and Thor are awkward, adorable, and passionate in a realistic way. Them navigating how to be together is a challenge that not all authors can rise to, so this is a great piece. So much yes. | 13.7

Never So Empty by iwillavengeyou: Thor has traveled the nine realms and seen many things in his centuries of godhood. What could possibly make everything seem so empty? Rec: Wow, just no. This hurts. This is not cool. Ow. Ow. Transcends angst and ends up somewhere much worse. Read if you’re into self-flagellation or are making a reclist. I literally yelled “Wow rude” at the conclusion of this fic. Major Character Death | 1.5k

An Ancient Gesture by Niobium: Jane and Thor come up with a tradition for dealing with situations where a social function gets to be a little too much for either of them. Rec: Super smiley, stomach flutter inducing fic. Fluff upon fluff, but also Asgard culture/worldbuilding! Yay! | 2.8k

Five Times Jane Kinda Sorta Accidentally Slept With An Avenger, The One Time She Didn’t, And the Many (Many) Times It Wasn’t Even a Little Accidental by shinyopals: Some people collect Avengers trading cards. Some collect action figures. Jane Foster, almost entirely without meaning to, has them all beat. Rec: If you’re not convinced by that title and summary, I’m not sure I can help you. Hilarious, in character, and kinda cute. | 9.3k

Well Remembered by Rozilla: Jane’s met Tony Stark before. Rec: Cracky and hilarious. | 1.1k

you may end up wanting more from this life by tosca1390: Everything is cold where it was once warm, and Jane is at a loss. Rec: Not sure why I haven’t put this beautiful thing on here yet. Deals with their separation, and a great character study of Jane. Angsty. | 1.6k

The Hearts of Stars and Thunder by MissChrisDaae, Science_Thunder_Lightning_Love: Rec: A Snow White and the Huntsman/Thor fusion. Really great use of characters, and all of the medieval battles and fosterson abound. | 7.7k

You Get One Phone Call by MissChrisDaae: Following the Battle of Manhattan, Jane gets a phone call. Rec: Post-battle strain, but then suddenly fosterson cuteness hits you like a wrecking ball. | <1k

Abs of Thunder by Unknownnobody32: During a flight on-board Stark’s jet, Jane learns how turbulence, pasta sauce, her Thunder god boyfriend, and his rock hard abs can soon become a recipe for embarrassment all thanks to bad timing. Rec: Takes washboard abs to another level. God, this is just too funny. | 2.1k

London, underground by Maybug: Clint Barton meets some familiar faces and has a very bad day hunting the jotunbeast left behind in London after the convergence. Rec: an awesome outside POV on fosterson, plus badass science Jane and her science assistant Thor, and awesome Clint. | 2.6k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

We have loved the stars to fondly by Maybug: Jane and Thor are up to something on the roof of the Tower. Tony thinks he knows what it is, but doesn’t see why he should be the one to tell them to stop. Rec: Outside POV of fosterson. Basically Thor does cute/dangerous things for Jane’s happiness. | 1.8k | Part of the Fosterson Files series

change places by coffeesuperhero: Jane and Thor get in the way of a Stark experiment. This goes about as well as you might expect. Rec: Body swap madness. So many cute moments though, plus some implied sexytimes with swapped bodies “for science.” So much yes. | 3.1k

Slowly, We Adjust by katsumi: Jane Foster leaves the lab on Friday exhausted, overworked, and petrified that she won’t get the grant proposal for her wormhole experiment finished in time to get funding. So, of course she gets rear-ended, because that’s just the kind of week she’s having. Rec: Protective/Worried Thor is best Thor. Reassuring Jane is best Jane. So much angst/cute. | 1.4k

Put a Ring on It by fuzzy_paint: Jane makes Thor a wedding ring. Rec: What it says on the tin. | 3.9k

The Pretty Birds Have Flown by beanarie: "Jane never pukes, not when she first wakes up, not at any other time of day. She has a cast-iron stomach and wicked stable inner ears, and morning sickness doesn’t stand a chance.“ The one where Thor knocked Jane up that night they chilled on the roof, and offscreen Frigga swore Heimdall to secrecy in the interest of protecting everyone involved. The All-Father’s house has a lot of enemies, okay. Rec: Heartbreaking, fluffy, and feelsy. Batten down the emotional hatches. | 2.2k

Jane Foster and the Impossible Library by Niobium: Jane, Darcy, and Thor find a peculiar library, and their afternoon takes a turn for the bizarre. Rec: This one’s wild from start to finish (I say that lovingly), but as always, Niobium delivers on fantastic characterizations. Not super-duper shippy, but so worth the read. | 12.4k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

Northern Climes by Tyranusfan: Six months after the Avengers saved New York from the Chitauri invasion, Thor must convince Odin to return him to Earth. Rec: Jane and Thor doing cutesy couple-y things. The author captures well the eager awkwardness of a new couple while remaining true to their characters and story. | 4.3k

nowhere to go but up by anthropologicalhands: It is not uncomfortable, waking up with Thor’s arm draped over her waist, their legs entangled under the sheets. It is inconvenient when she wants to get out of bed or, at the very least, look over last night’s data. Rec: So very fluffy it makes me want to roll in it. Adorably domestic, too. Jane at her scienceing finest. | 2.3k

Late Night Waiting by hariboo: Jane didn’t often get home late. Rec: A very sweet and simple Jane/Thor that makes their relationship seem very grounded and real. Also, it is so sweet it makes my teeth hurt, and then I just want more. | 2.1k

Uru by sheffiesharpe: Thor cannot look after Jane, no matter how he wants to. Hogun offers a solution. Puente Antiguo receives another unexpected visitor. Rec: The author makes a really strange concept work brilliantly. Jane and Thor’s pining is frustrating and well-written, and the writing sizzles with unresolved sexual tension. | 6k

Star-Crossed by websandwhiskers: A vignette taking place during "Avengers”, after shawarma, before Thor returns to Asgard with Loki. Thor and Jane have their reunion, and discuss their future. Rec: Jane is an awesome person, and Thor respects the hell out of her. One of the best portrayals of Jane Foster that I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading. | 1.7k

The Morning After by fuzzy_paint: "I can’t believe we’re doing this,“ Jane says. "Can you believe we’re doing this?" Rec: Even without much in way of dialogue, Jane and Thor’s devotion is plain. We get a little view of domestics, too. | 1.7k

The Observable Universe by Sarea Okelani (sarea): As an astrophysicist, Jane studies the observable universe for work, but in her free time what she likes to study is a bit closer to home. (Or: Jane has a low tolerance for stupidity. Clint and Natasha take exception to being called stupid.) Rec: Not a ton of overt Jane/Thor, and is mostly an outsider POV on Clint/Natasha, but there is lots of team shenanigans and there is definitely a lot of affection for Thor from Jane’s POV. | 10k

Deal by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane introduces Thor to the great Midgardian tradition of being made to remove your clothing when you lose a hand of poker. Everybody wins! Rec: I got a huge kick out of this one. Toeing the line of becoming crackfic. Oh, how I wish there was a smutty follow up. | 2k

Before the Fall by verily-thor: Jane helps Thor prepare for Ragnarök. Rec: Oh god, if you’re in the mood for some sadness, come on in here. Tragic without being grotesque, stripping it down to the bare emotions, and two people who love each other more than anything. | <1k

top gun is not a movie; it’s a lifestyle by hariboo: jane and thor got that loving feeling. Rec: an AU that is reminiscent of Top Gun, which is a fab movie. Awesome Jane, and adorable Thor. | 2k

A Brief Introduction to Asgardian Dinner Parties by jonesandashes and pentapus: This is the first Earth-Asgard bonding opportunity since that time Loki punched interstellar relations in the face, twice, and the king and queen of Asgard are here, and they are her boyfriend’s parents. Jane is absolutely not going to get drunk at this party, is the point. Rec: This fic makes you smile, then laugh, then cringe, then do it all over again. | 4.5k

Destiny, Disrupted by me: Loki never sends the Destroyer to Midgard. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.5k

Rated M (these won’t contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**The Teardrop by igi_pigi: Post-Infinity War reunion of Thor and Jane. Forewarning - heavy angst. [Set right after the movie] Rec: Angst, melodrama, and desperation ahoy. Contains some smut | 4.2k

all the best distractions by fuzzypaint: They've found a rhythm when they share Jane's lab, Jane with her science and Thor with his own work, and though it is easy to be distracted by each other, usually they're both very capable of avoiding such things. Usually. Rec: Cunniligus in the lab ;) | Contains smut | 1.8k

Patience and Poker by Rozilla: Jane and Thor sneak off from one of Stark's parties for a quiet chat. Nope, just kidding, hot tub sex. Snarky hot tub sex. Best kind. Rec: What it says on the tin and it’s delightful. | Contains smut | 4k

A Deal with the Duke: An Epilogue by hariboo: Thursdays were busy days around the house, but today was the first day of winter much. Thankfully, the skies were clear, without a hint of storm, but the wind was sharp and bit into his cheeks. He was looking forward to a warm meal and seeing his wife, curling around her in bed for rest of the evening. Rec: Historical romance AU. A nice slice of life bit. Contains minor smut | 2.8k

Ray of Light by evieeden: To Thor, Jane shone brighter than any star in the sky. Advent fic for 18th December. Rec: A sweet, introspective fic from Thor’s POV. | 1.5k

just memories to hold by tosca1390: When the dust and light and smoke clears, the roof of Stark Tower is still intact. Jane can still feel the surge of power in her fingertips, thinks she could hear the songs of Asgard, feel the chill of Jotenheim, as the bridge built itself through Yggdrasil, Thor calling her name across realms. And then, a shadow falls over Jane. Rec: A really, really great post-Avengers reunion fic. Contains some smut | 3.6k

set with the stars by hariboo: jane tries to teach thor earth’s stars. tries, being the operative word. Rec: Jane and Thor getting distracted by each others’ sexy is my favorite thing. Contains some smut | 1.5k

It Could Be Sweet by hariboo: Jane and Thor traverse their last year of high-school. However, they didn’t expect it to be together. Rec: I am not a big fan of high school AUs, but if they float your boat, this is definitely worthwhile. Contains some smut | 7.8k | Part of Let’s Be Young Forever series

Thunder Whispered Low by Niobium: Rec: I love it when Thor talks about his magic, and the bridge that makes between him and Jane. Contains minor smut | 1.5k

Specularity by Niobium: Jane’s bad day improves significantly with a little reflection. Rec: A great slice of life fic, really, really nice interactions. Contains very minor smut | 3k | Part of the Jane Foster Works series

My Blood is Singing by Niobium: Sometimes Thor pushes a storm a little too far. And, sometimes, the storm pushes back. Rec: Jane and Thor at their domestic finest, with some internal angst and the simple comfort found with another person. Contains smut | 2.9k

All my faces are alibis by agirlnamedchuck: Thor is strong and stubborn and she thinks she could be a good king. Maybe even a great one. Besides she’d never seen herself as queen anyways. Rec: Genderswapped Thor. Fosterson is minimal, but amazing insights into Thor’s character. | 6.5k

Leaving On An Airship by Rozilla: To escape to a better life, Jane Foster, maid to a cruel villainous Baron, must leave her lover and disguise herself. But not before one last goodbye. Rec: *cartwheels into the sun* FOSTERSON STEAMPUNK WITH SMUT AND FEELINGS OH GOD SEND HELP. Contains some smut | 2.6k

Unrememberance by letthesongtakeflight: Before he became the Huntsman, he was a prince. Rec: Marvel/Snow White and the Huntsman fusion. Prequel of sorts to SWatH. Angst on angst. Major character death | 1.2k

steal my heart 'til kingdom come by tosca1390: Her eyes stray over reading upon reading; she thinks she can taste the tang of energy and ozone even now, and that strange sense of pine and smoke that she associates with Thor. Rec: AU post-Avengers where Thor goes to visit Jane who has remained in New Mexico. Yay for a great collision of two characters who absolutely did not prepare for any of this. Contains some smut | 2.1k

fingerprints that leave me covered for days by tosca1390: It is not all lost, to be stranded here. Perhaps, he could make something of it. Rec: Another AU in which Thor is on Earth longer in the first movie. Great development for Thor, and the relationship he has with Jane feels very real. | 5.5k

journeys end in lovers’ meeting by tosca1390: Solitary moments in snow; it sounds conducive to rest, to a time of rejuvenation before her research resumes. Rec: A really cute AU based on the movie The Holiday (which I’ve never seen before). Just adorable holiday fluff wherein Thor is human. Contains some smut | 19k

Bound by Medie: It was ironic that his and Loki’s greatest mistakes had led to her. Rec: Some tame bondage featuring dom!Jane. Contains smut | 1.1k

Rated E (these will contain the smuts unless otherwise noted)

**Ambush by orphan_account: Jane isn't into violence, but there's something about those SHIELD debriefings, something primal and raw about hearing how the bad guys got their asses handed to them by the good guys, something that inspires her to act on instinct alone. Rec: If you’ve got a thing for Thor’s armor.... mmmhmmm. | 1.1k

Is This More than You Bargained for Yet by Anshin Archives: Thor and Jane's first go at sex. Jane's expecting Thor to have a cock, and is surprised when he doesn't. It doesn't take her long to adjust. (Pure porn for the excuse of writing Thor with a vagina.) Rec: Genderfluidity and completely accepted queerness for the win. | 2.5k

When Jane Pegged Thor by waldorph: They raise them slutty in Asgard. Rec: What it says on the tin. Pretty damn hot if pegging is up your alley ;). | 1.4k

Practical Magic by Rozilla: Freya’s flowers can do funny things to you. Rec: Roz is the queen of smut so this is amazing. Kind of a play on sex pollen, but takes it in a totally new, refreshing direction. Asgardian sex magic for the win. | 2.8k

built on the old rivers by fartherfaster: You catch her wrist and delicately kiss the bone of it. “Nothing to be sorry for,” you tell her. She composes her reality in absolutes and theories and the true phenomenal names of things. Colloquial language is not her means of communication. You like her hard lines, her curiosity, her determination. Jane would never call Mjolnir just a hammer, and that puts a small, needy part of you to rest. There is a storm in the desert, and Thor comes to terms with all of his changes. The one where human-Thor has Lichtenberg figures. Rec: Incredibly poignant and the author makes a second-person POV work incredibly well. | 3.3k

Tell Me Something New by hariboo: "Compile the data of the reading we took during Convergence. The gravitational–“ She trails off, can’t finish the sentence out loud or in her mind, her voice catching on the words as Thor’s mouth latches onto her throat. Rec: Cute and hot and perfect because smart Jane is Thor’s biggest turn on. | 1.5k

On the Throne by murdur: His insistence that she should sit on the throne had been in jest and merriment, but the sight of her sitting upon the seat now makes his heart beat quick and steals his breath. Rec: Oh my god, Thor goes down on Jane while she sits on the throne of Asgard. I have nothing else to say. *dies* | <1k

Experience Counts for Something by Rozilla: Jane was surprised at Thor’s new female body- but pretty keen to explore it. Rec: Bisexual Jane and Genderfluid Thor are great. Some hot femslash fosterson. | 2.3k

Just Get In The Van by paxnirvana: Written for a prompt on Anenko’s Bad Sex & Awkward Romance: a comment-a-thon that got away from me. Rec: All first time sex is gonna be awkward, friends, even if you’re Jane and Thor. Might as well enjoy the ride. | 6.3k

close your eyes and count to ten by fuzzy_paint: Post battle, Jane and Thor make sure the other still lives. Rec: Reassurance of safety sex is hot. Sue me. Still manages to be angsty too. | 2.4k

We Woke Up In The Kitchen by hariboo: He didn’t think he could miss someone as he missed her, but there is something singular in Jane that pulls at him and threatens to overtake him. Rec: post-TDW sexies that are adorable and awkward and hot all at once, plus some really nice conversation at the end. This author just really gets Jane and Thor in a way that is always awesome to read. | 3.7k

A Helping Hand by fuzzy_paint: Jane can’t sleep. Thor has a solution. Rec: Some nice, cute sleepy!smut to help Jane to relax and stop thinking. | 1.5k

The Scientific Method by Serious Snugglebunnies: Thor is much too honourable to have meaningless sex with Jane - but will he do it for the sake of science? Rec: Cracky, hilarious, and hot. | 3.3k

A Thorny Situation by GreenVelvetCurtains: Jane has a problem and she’s not afraid to try and solve it. Rec: A hot fantasizing/masturbation piece starring the lovely Jane Foster. | 2.7k

Detours by ancarett: Life is a highway. Jane takes Thor on the detours. Missing moments from the movie. Rec: Some mildly awkward sex which is actually kind of adorable and works out for everyone in the end. Not my favorite smut ever, but worth a read. | 3.9k

Say It’s Okay by theleaveswant: Darcy gave her a sympathetic pout and walked around the table to put both hands on Jane’s upper arms. “Okay. Honey? I know this isn’t your preferred way of handling things, but it looks like you’re going to have to talk with him.” Rec: Big premium on 'consent is sexy.’ Jane teaches Thor how to pleasure her. Not my favorite smut, but worth a read. | 2.1k

Accretion by RC_McLachlan: "You are burning inside,” Thor whines, rolling his hips again, and she rides it out helplessly, eyes rolling back, lungs cramping with envy for air. “Like a star." Rec: A seriously hot look at the simple difference in size between Jane and Thor. | 1.6

Salt On Your Lips by Barkour: The strawberry daiquiri is indeed a drink worthy of adulation, but Thor prefers the taste of Jane Foster. Rec: For it’s sense of fun that comes with the sex, and the pure happiness of two people who simply enjoy being in each other’s company. | 2k

Good Morning by me: Jane wakes up with Thor between her legs.My addition to Fosterson Week’s smut day. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 2k

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by me: Jane and Thor do Christmas. (Finally.) Tis the season for holiday smut. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 5.4k

Your Highness by me: Jane wants something in bed and Thor is more than happy to oblige. For the first day of Fosterson Week, post-TDW. Rec: It’s not a true reclist without a self plug. | 6k

Not Your Average Star Trek Fanfiction by me: After several years of unresolved sexual tension, Jane and Thor are in quite a rush to rectify the situation. Takes place immediately following TDW. Rec: Because it wouldn’t be a true reclist without a self-plug. | 3.7k

#fosterson #jane foster #thor #jane x thor #thor x jane #fosterson fic rec masterlist #fic recs

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whatdoesshedotothem · 3 years

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Tuesday 6 May 1834

6 55/..

12 50/..

Very fine morning – ready at 8 ¾ and out till breakfast at 9 ½ - Pickles and Dick in the morning and the other man (John Ombler, cropper) with them in the afternoon taking clay out (10inch deeper) of the north parlour. Mallinson and 3 men - hewing except one and lastly 2 pulling down wall and making place for turn stile or rather little turn gate and the door (what stood in coal-place near embouchure of water closet) into the approach road, the gate now being boarded being so heavy and wind if strong having so much power that some easier entrance yet secure against sheep and cattle must be planned. Charles and James Howarth busy about hanging the gate now door and finishing boarding it. John brought 3 rows (3/8) of a rood of outsides for walling up little gateways in the morning and was moving flowers and 2 plants of yellow jasmine from under drawing room and hall windows and planting out 16 rhododendron Ponticum 12 laurustinus, and 25 yews from Throp that came this afternoon. Kept Pickells and his men to help him till after 7 and the masons till even after that. John ill and bilious today - Pickles sprained his ankle (done yesterday) and sent Matthew about 8 to Mr Sunderland on the old mare could not walk with an inflamed ankle - the young man gave an embrocation and said it would soon be well, but he was to go again tomorrow -out all day (with John in the afternoon) except from 1 ½ to 3 asleep in my study – dinner at 6 – my soup and roast mutton then out again and came in at 7 to rice pudding and coffee then out again till 9 ½. ¼ hour with Marian and ditto with my aunt. Note letter this morning forwarded by Miss Walker from Mrs Scott no! G.W. Ellis York dated 3 May to say my letter had been so long unanswered on account of her husband being far from home but Joseph was to be off as today. Miss W- filled up the blank paper - good account of herself – Sarah a great comfort to her – thinks Dr Belcombe has not heard anything particular about herself and me or if he has he behaves very magnanimously. Letter this evening 3 pages from M- Leamington dated 4th inst. tho’ she has not written she constantly thought of me ‘I have forborne to write as I feared to let my paper carry you the feelings which have never ceased to press upon my heart since I received your letter of the 15th April. I cannot remember longer silent but will endeavour to forborne writing anything which can either annoy, or make you think me more weak than you yet have supposed me. Besides, all this, your happiness is very, very dear to me, and after all the years you have sacrificed to me, I ought indeed to rejoice that ‘your days of solitude are drawing to a close’. I don’t apprehend that mine will ever come, as I have little doubt but that the quiet church at Lawton will secure the last of me, long before any other change takes place in the family. But it so, I am as I have always expressed myself to you, entirely satisfied that such should be the case, and now, I have an additional reason for the feeling. But I will not write thus because I really am thankful to believe you are as happy as I can desire. Your having taken another to your bosom has not left vacant your place in Mary’s heart you have it too long and too exclusively to be pushed aside by any other fresh interest may squeeze themselves pretty closely by the side but they have not and cannot encroach that my happiness is dear to you I well know surely we neither of us can forget ‘if the sunshine of love has illuminated our youth’ ‘the moonlight of friendship’ may at last ‘console our decline’ let fate do her worst there are remembrances of the past of which she cannot rob me this often steal to my heart and perhaps scatter away the darkest clouds. ‘But Freddy, dear Freddy, somehow I feel awkward in writing to you, I know not that I write for you alone, and the thought discomforts me even tho’ my letters might be hung on the church door. Give a faithful answer to this part of my letter’. Going to Lawton as yesterday for a week on account of her schools ‘and because change of air Mr Pritchard thinks will do me good’ – the holiday being on the 20th proximo and they are to receive the boys (Lawtons) at Leamington - mentions the Camerons going away for the summer. ‘I shall finish my letter here for my thoughts will run in one channel. As I am quite sure your undertakings are founded on reason, it is but rational to have little doubt of your success. May Heaven ever bless and [present] you and be assured that I deeply feel your assurances of present and future regard - not less than ever affectionately yours Mariana’. She writes as if too bitterly repenting the deed of her own doing as if as much attached to me as ever how strangely inconsistent her conduct has been still by her own shewing I am right. ‘Virtutem incolumem odimus, sublatam ex oculis quaerimus invidi [Odiamo la virtù viva ma toltaci dagli occhi, la cerchiamo con invidia] Poor Mary! She had her happiness for gold, and the price was fatally too dear – wrote all the above of today till 11 ¾. Fine day rather dullish, fortunately for my evergreens not much sun – F62° now at 11 ¾. William Green told me today Joseph Wilkinson said he would give him as much for his cottage as I would (£100 offered £90 before) and would like me to let him and his wife gave it their joint lives at £5 per annum - refused to enfranchise it (leasehold) - would be obliged to me to let him have it - or I had better buy the field it stands in - told William to inquire what price he would take for the field - would give its worth, but not more and thought William had better sell his cottage to me than to JW.

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racheljchen · 4 years

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story vomit

-hong kong runaway idea reality in mental hospital? mr robot perfect blue -blue hour love "i wanna be scary" heart break shaves eyebrows red lipstick black panther for asians space? dreamjng of home story about learning to let go and putting yourself first story about choosing happiness, prolonged misery JYN AND CASSIAN IMMORTALS her fingers ruffled through soft locks of his hair, and her heart swelled. it was too little and too much all at once, after all the years apart, how could she have ever doubted wanting to be by his side again? Now that he was in her arms the certainty seemed to settle into an unshakable truth, that she and he were meant to return to each other, circling each other, standing by the other's side no matter the circumstances of the rest of the foolish world. the girl from before, who only knew of solitude, of running, looking over shoulder at every turned would have thought this new certainty unthinkable. it might have terrified her or disgusted her, but the Jyn of now was a different woman. his eyes caught her transfixed gaze and crinkled with a smile she knew better than her own. no words needed to break the cozy silence for the understanding to pass between them. there was nothing she wanted more than to crush his body to hers, to hold him gently and never let go again but the feeling overwhelmed her and she could only continue to cradle his head in her lap, stroking a finger down the jawline she loved. mine. mine. her heart said, touching a body that was not her own, this skin which would pierce me to be bruised, these bones which would shatter her to be broken. hours later, after many hushed words had passed between them, describing in few short words the many hard years that had passed for each of them, as the sky began to flush lilac with the rising sun, they broke apart with much hesitance. after several failed attempts on cassian's part to urge her to the fresher for a much needed shower, she finally relented breaking the connecting touch betwen them. jyn couldnt contain the tiniest childish pout. how could she miss holding him within seconds of relinquishing the contact? annoyed at feeling like a childish teenager but still petulant to let go. "go!" urged cassian, his eyes crinkling with a grin, and then, of course how she resist grabbing his smiling face again and kissing those grinning lips. cassians arms could not help but to circle around her waist but of course he was the one with the greater self restraint and he withdrew them after a few moments, pushing her gently towards the fresher door. under the hot satisfying spray Jyn allower herself the luxury of a quick moment to just enjoy the comforts of a life not based on the next meal, next job, and the overhanging urgency of survival, before she got to work scrubbing off the unholy layers of grime on her body. as she lathered suds into her hair, the fresher door clicked open with a soft hiss, and she peered through the fogged shower door at cassian, who of course smiled at her again, and she marveled at the ease of his surrending unlimited smiles for her when he was a man of few smiles for the rest of the universe. and with that her traitorous heart was off again, squeezing with the overwhelming painful joy of having him by her side again. cassian rinsed his toothbrush, finished with brushing his teeth. with a mischievous grin he peeled of his under shirt and dropped his trousers to the floor. steam poured out of the fresher as he slipped in beside her, putting his rough hands on the soft slick skin of her waist. jyn hooked her arms around his neck and tiptoed up to kiss him, soft sweet and slow, and they stood under the spray, feeling each other up like teenagers until suddenly Jyn shrieked. "Ah! Sorry, sorry, the boiler tank is small, I've been wanting to install a bigger one-" Jyn laughed despite the freezing spray erasing her comfortable warmth by the second. "get out you horn dog i still have to rinse out my hair" one of them gets executed but comes back to life cassian? comes back to find jyn and their child // cassian as a fire breathing bar tender modern au where they're divorced drug cartel AU krennic and galen in the cia/dea jyn smuggles or deals arms or something cassian is an undercover DEA agent cassian riding a horse, wearing a cowboy hat, smoking patron notices cassian is into jyn and 'gives' her to him "you're a lucky guy" thats just a nice way to say i want to fuck your girl jyn if you do this i can't protect you ive known these guys my whole life and you think you can get into this game for a couple months and i need you to protect me from them i dont mean from them cassian joserra jerome antonio anglés andrez after they settle down: oh where did you guys meet jyn: tinder // divorced soulmates when they meet jyn can tell its something special. she's been around the block enough to know that this one wasn't for messing around, that they meant too much to each other. cassian tamed her and she brought him to life and his friends were all supportive of course, relieved he had found some joy at last, that he finally had a reason to leave the office without putting in overtime more days of the week than not, a reason for brief smiles to stsrt escaping his serious outward demeanor. all they saw was cassian hiding a smile in a tumblr of mezcal st the bar with them, watching jyn dance with han and kes, twirling around them with smooth confidence as they tried not to trip on their own feet. how could it be anything but good? jyn knows cassian would never hurt her on purpose so she lets herself fall too easily, then slowly her life revolved around him. he occupied her throughts, her space, and she became nothing more than a part of cassian, his wife, as honoured and respectable as the role was she became suffocated with being introduced as his wife, people telling her what a great man her husband was, and she became defined by him, strangers assuming insight of her. when she leaves she finds herself all alone, realising all the friends she had were gifted to her by cassian, and the thought infuriates her. not at cassian, never at cassian, but at her past self for allowing this to happen, blind to painfully learned lessons to always have an escape route in sight, to rely on herself first and foremost. when she leaves, the pain is unbearable. she cries and she cries herself to sleep, and when she wakes up she's temporarily soothed her mind betraying her with the false sense that all the pain was just a bad dream and she would roll over and see cassian there, soft and warm and comforting and ready to hold her close and kiss the nightmare away. but the realisation came quick and she would be sobbing again. in the end it was only her stubborn pride that saved her the indignity of crawling back to him on her knees begging. or maybe it was the stone pit on her stomach that said you did this. you hurt him like this, and for what? how can you deserve to try and salvage what was perfectly good before you picked it up and smashed it on the ground just to see how the splinters would fall? when the fog of misery starts to fade though, she is relieved. even as she sits in her crappy, hole in the wall apartment, eating left over pizza for a undignified amount of times in a month, she is so relieved to be free. even if the AC keeps crapping out and she's sweating in February and bodhi has been the only other person to visit her apartment she is so relieved. her thoughts were her own again and she was so happy she could cry "jyn you will always be my family. you know that right?" she doesn't deserve it cassian walking barefoot in the shore wash at blue hour this pain wasn't unbearable but it was a unique brand of torturous. knowing exactly what she wanted was right in front of her, seeing it, touching it in soft polite embraces that lingered just on the dangerous end of perfunctory hellos and goodbyes. she's already had a taste of exactly everything she wants (not needs, not anymore, and that made the pain tolerable but a new unique brand of torturous), and she couldn't have it. she threw it all away. no regrets could be had, she would have never made it here without giving it up, but it certainly didnt help when they sat on the opposite ends of the friends spanning a bar counter and her attention still strayed from whatever kes was talking about to start at his lips, soft from worrying at the glass tumbler in his hand, hearing the memory of the laugh she only watched escape from him in real life as it was lost in the din of the bar. "i forgave you for literally tearing my heart apart the first time, but as much of a masochist as i am, I can't give you permission to do it again. so what is it jyn?" "come on jyn. it doesn't take an idiot to see how much we still care about each other" their scars are the only soft and tender part on them, new and innocent skin next to hard won calluses cassian's ex wife meet first time when cassian gets backup for his mission huge sexual tension competence porn celebrating successful mission, cassian shoots his shot she reveals she used to be in intelligence "understand this captain andor. i have a lot of respect for what you do. it's horrid work but it needs to be done. matter of fact i started in intelligence. but the one thing i know, is the kind of person that can stand that line of work, the kind of person i was back then, thats not the kind of people i want to break bread with" she pulls rank on him despite him being older and more experienced. "in my branch you get promoted fast because you die fast" cassian was being pessimistic/realist sbout expected bad outcome but young recruit is horrified more massive sexual tension at a bar or something, she goes outside to make out with some rando guy, cassian follows her and chases him off and kisses her. not nice and tender, hatefuck in an alleyway but it's so hot doesn't see each other again fuck in a tent, fuck in the showers start to bond, see each other's honour and kindess. after a bad mission she's doubting herself, unable to sleep, cassian takes her to a secret vantage point. "sometimes i think i'm a dispicable person" "not to me" he kisses her "what, really here?" where they're in constant threat of being walked in on "no." they just make out and its tender snd loving and it scares her off and she avoids him for a while cassian gets captured and held in solitary confinement for months, mentally tortured, starved. tries to escape, gets punished. gets fucked up in the head. draven and elkie are the only one pushing to find him and break him out. after cassian is found and returns to base he's a shell of himself, spooked, makes intense eye contact with elkie as he passes her but no aknowledgement of their signifigance to each other. after medical checks he's left alone and starts to panic, but before he freaks out fully, she comes into his room with shaving kit and a peach. she cuts a few slices for him to enjoy because hes not really allowed fruit, talks to him and shaves him as he heals she arranges for him to be put in a room with a chatty old soldier who keeps telling him old war stories, and visits him whenever she back on base. after a particularly bad mission. she crawls into his hospital bed in the middle of the night. after he's discharged, she sleeps with him whenever she can, calming him down after nightmares. one night he knows she's sleep deprived and needing to wake up early for important things the next day and tells her to stop sacrificing her sleep to help him. she's quiet before she asks if he is making her leave. he says no, so she just snuggles up to him. he realizes she prefers being woken up all night to sleeping without him. one say when cassian's feeling like he cant stand being amongst the people on the base in the mess hall, she brings him back to the vantage point to have lunch. they fuck but it's making love. something in between she gets captured and tortured. breaks leg. cassian rescues her. cassian cares for her in the immediate aftermath, she wakes up to him asleep in the hospital chair after he comes back from his own mission back on base, superiors want to send her off base to recuperate and get better PT, she really doesn't want to go, she knows she might never make it back and lose her nerve and her mind. their sleeping in cassian's bed and she admits this. he says there's desk work she can do on base. "married officers get first choice of postings" she's stunned by the insinuation "i need to know you arent whoring yourself out out of some misplaced need to take care of me. just because you slept with me a couple times doesn't mean i'm your responsibility." "i need to know you aren't... offering... out of convenience. just a loophole to help me out" "i'm not. i can't live without you anymore" they get married, she takes his name. captain andor and captain andor she drops off the grid for an extended period of time, she sees him in a crowd and he thinks she's a hostile, tries to take her down but she takes off her mask and goggles she dies in his arms CASSIAN'S LITTLE SISTER/DAUGHTER cassian's 16 she's 8, he saves her and has to babysit her for a while around rogue one she's 18 starting to do field work as an agent cassian as fulcrum is not nice or friendly but mentors her and takes care of her she just starts acting like a friend even though she has no reason to treat him like one bonds with jyn they go to each other when they're concerned about cassian, jyn tells her about a miscarriage, she tells jyn about PTSD she doesn't want to admit to cassian later as peace becomes more viable and cassian less cold and jaded, he starts to act like her family and at first it scares her off a bit she's hostile, says you don't have any right treating me like a child considering how you treated me in the past CASSIAN JYN F1 bodhi jyn both trained by legendary race strategist galen erso (betrays imperial team and orson krennic?) bodhi was trained to to compete and be great, jyn was thrown in and not expected by others to be a real competitor jyn joins f1 with saw gerrera's partisans, low midfield team, strapped for cash bodhi drives with his brain jyn drives with her gut bodhi tells her she can be truly great when she masters melding the thinking and control with her raw talent jyn podiums once and is over the moon but cassian isnt happy for her and she doesnt understand cassian says she doesnt understand racing yet, put herself on the line for revenge, had no way of knowing she was gonna survive her dirty trick and she only won when almost half the field retired calls her hotheaded and not ready cassian was an excellent ruthless driver, would drive dirty to make the win very good (champion?) gets into bad crash (jyn saves him?) and retires, join rebellion as race strategist cassian suggests jyn as new driver leia backs him up jyn helps cassian with his PT and tells him he doesn't have to put on a mask for her and he allows himself to show that he's in pain jyn falls asleep in cassian's hotel room and when he tucks her in she grabs him and they fall asleep together at a party after a good win jyn's tipsy and grabs cassian and starts singing and dancing in his face and cassian is laughing and loving every moment jyn's championship title comes down to the last race she gets a rough bump that physically takes a toll on her she has a good lead but she blows a tire and limps home (krennic gets on the radio somehow to try and break her confidence?) cassian: "do your best, bring her home. i'm right here jyn, I'm with you to the end. I'm not going anywhere" jyn wins a championship and retires she's proved herself after no one thought she would, defeated vader for a season she knows she doesn't have a strong chance of doing it again and wants to make room for luke and han so they don't join imperial F1 STORY young hotshot female driver gets put into falling from glory ferrari with him he used to be eyed as the next great talent but in a shit car he doesn't have any accomplishments to show and is starting to lose the hype and his drive to win she idolizes him, after a race where she does very well for a rookie and he delivers good but not great results, she goes into his driver's room and congratulates him on a good drive out of a need to assert control he fucks her he's trying to massage his own shoulder, she says here let me help, get close, talking, he turns to catch her eye and realises how close they are and kisses her fucks her on the desk, hot and dirty after their lustful scramble he comes back yo his senses and is a bit ashamed of what he's done kisses her on the forehead and leaves, saying see you tomorrow they keep hooking up throughout her rookie season, and spending time together in the public eye, her sweet genuine humorous personality tempers his steely cold and focussed persona and media and fans eat it up, everyone loves them as old gruff dude and young hotshot jokester duo two seasons like that as they grow closer there's a picture of him as a f1 rookie giving 14yo her a trophy forehead kisses become a meme she tells him what he already knows, he needs to jump ship from the team he loves in order to win he signs with a top three team as she continues to get more experience at their old team throughout the season they continue hooking up and hanging out in winter break they spend a lot of time with each other, to the point it seems like they're dating but theyve never discussed it he wins a world championship, realises the only person he wants to celebrate with is her she gets signed to a title contender team next time they hook up he's being a tender and says something commitment related she freezes up "what did you think this is" "yeah of course anyone would jump at the chance to fuck their idols, that doesn't mean their idols would be a good person to settle down with" "did u think i would fall in love with you just because i look up to you? im not some groupie. as if you weren't just taking advantage of me the first time, cheating on your girlfriend. im smart enough to know I'm not special, if you did it to her you certainly have it in you to do it to me" "i think we should stop doing this" breakup, theyre both heartbroken he feels betrayed, thinking the girl he's in love with just used him she doesn't want to admit she really did fall for him he gets signed to the same team as her the whole world is super excited to see their chemistry again but they're super cold, barely together, barely acknowledge each other press conference she blows off the question of whether she's excited to be teammates again he gets into tabloids rumored to be dating hot celebs they have a bad rivalry on the track fighting for positions gets double retirement and other bad things eventually he realises she only pushed him away out of self preservation and she mist have loved him to have done so much and cared for him the way she did he apologizes and asks her to give them a chance she's shocked but she agrees, but she says they shouldnt be together until the season is over cue sexual tension she misses him too much and he comes into her hotel room to get a fright shes in his bed and they cuddle she wins the championship after 5 years of being together and racing, he retires proposes to her, to the shock of the world

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wasalwaysagreatpickle · 4 years

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Tuesday 6 May 1834

6 55/..

12 50/..

Very fine morning – ready at 8 3/4 and out till breakfast at 9 1/2 – Pickells and Dick in the morning and the other man (John Ombler, cropper) with them in the afternoon taking clay out (10 inches deeper) of north parlour – Mallinson and 3 men – hewing except 1 man and lastly 2 pulling down wall and making place for turn stile or rather little turn gate and the door (what stood in coal-place near embouchure of water closer) into the approach road, the gate now being boarded being so heavy and wind if stuck having so much power that some easier entrance yet secure against sheep and cattle must be planned –

Charles and James Howarth busy about hanging the gate now door and finishing boarding it – John brought 3 rows (3/8) of a rood of outsides for walling up little gateways in the morning and was moving flowers and 2 plants of yellow jasmine from under drawing room and hall windows and planting out 16 rhododendran Ponticum, 12 laurestinus, and 25 yews from Throp that came this afternoon – Kept Pickells and his men to help him till after 7 and the masons till even after that –

John ill and bilious today – Pickells sprained his ankle (done yesterday) and sent Matthew about 8 to Mr Sunderland on the old mare, could not walk, with an inflamed ankle – the young man gave an embrocation and said it would soon be well, but he was to go again tomorrow –

Out all the day (with John in the afternoon) except from 1 1/2 to 3 asleep in my study – dinner at 6, my soup and roast mutton, then out again and came in at 7 to rice pudding and coffee then out again till 9 1/2 – 1/4 hour with Marian and ditto with my aunt –

Note letter this morning forwarded by Miss Walker from Mrs Scott no! G W. Ellis, York, dated 3 May to say my letter had been so long unanswered on account of her husband being from home but Joseph was to be off as today – Miss Walker filled up the blank paper – good account of herself – Sarah a great comfort to her – thinks Dr Belcombe has not heard anything

particular about herself me or if he has he behaves very magnanimously –

Letter this evening 3 pages from Mariana, Leamington dated the 4th instant tho’ she has not written she constantly thought of me ‘I have forborne to write as I feared to let my paper carry you the feelings which have never ceased to press upon my heart since I received your letter of the 15th of April I cannot remain longer silent but will endeavour to forbear writing anything which can either annoy, or make you think me more weak than you yet have supposed me –

‘Besides, all this, your happiness is very, very dear to me, and after all the years you have sacrificed to me, I ought indeed to rejoice that ‘your days of solitude are drawing to a close’ – I do not apprehend that mine will ever come, as I have little doubt but that the quiet church at Lawton will receive the last of me, long before any other change takes place in the family – Be it so, I am, as I have always expressed myself to you, entirely satisfied that such should be the case, and now, I have an additional reason for the feeling – But I will not write thus because I really am thankful to believe you are as happy as I can desire’

Your having taken another to your bosom has not left vacant your place in Mary’s heart, you have it too long and too exclusively to be pushed aside by any other fresh interests may squeeze themselves pretty closely by the side but they have not and cannot encroach that my happiness is dear to you I well know surely we neither of us can forget ‘if the sunshine of love has illumined our youth’ ‘the moonlight of friendship’ may at last ‘console our decline’ let fate do her worst there are remembrances of the past of which she cannot rob me this often steal to my heart and perhaps scatter away the darkest clouds

‘But Freddy, dearest Freddy somehow I feel awkward in writing to you, I know not that I write for you alone, and the thought discomforts me even though my letters might be hung on the church door – give a faithful answer to this part of my letter’ going to Lawton as yesterday for a week – on account of her schools and ‘because the change of air Mr Pritchard thinks will do me good’ – the holidays began on the 20th proximo and they are to receive the boys (Lawtons) at Leamington – mentions the Camerons going away for the summer – ‘I shall finish my letter here, for my thoughts will run in one channel – As I am quite sure your undertakings are founded on reason, it is but rational to have little doubt of success – may Heaven ever bless and preserve you, and be assured that I deeply feel your assurances of present and future regard – not less than ever affectionately yours, Mariana’ –

She writes as if too bitterly repenting the deed of her own doing as if as much attached to me as ever how strangely inconsistent her conduct has been still by her own shewing I am right

‘Virtutem incolumem odimus sublatam ex oculis invidi querimus’ Poor Mary! she traded her happiness for gold; and the price was fatally too dear –

Wrote all the above of today till 11 3/4 – fine day, rather dullish – fortunately for my evergreens not much sun – Fahrenheit 62˚ now at 11 3/4 p.m. – William Green told me today Joseph Wilkinson said he would give him as much for his cottage as I would (£100 offered £90 before) and would like me let him and his wife have it the joint lives at £5 per annum – refused to enfranchise it (leasehold) – would be obliged to me to let him have it – or I had better buy the field it stands in – Told William to inquire what price he would take for the field – would give its worth, but not more and thought William had better sell his cottage to me than to Joseph Wilkinson

#anne lister #anne lister code breaker #mariana lawton #1834

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amaramonette · 5 years

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is that [ ISABEL DURANT ]? no, that’s just [ AMARA MONETTE ]. [ SHE/HER ] is [ TWENTY-SIX ] years old and is a [ PROFESSIONAL FIGURE SKATER ]. rumor has it they’ve been in town for [ NEARLY THEIR WHOLE LIFE ]. on a good day, they’re [ PERCEPTIVE & CULTURED ]. but watch out! they can also be [ SPITEFUL & POSSESSIVE ]. [ MORAL OF THE STORY by ASHE ] plays in my head whenever i think of them. can’t wait to see them around spring hill!

hellllooo! i’m li and i’m pretty excited to be here and start using my new bby. she’s a bit of a mash-up of a few different muses that i absolutely love so i’m very stoked to see how this goes lmao. i apologize now for this bio, it took me fivever and it's hella long but like everything i do is long. ( sorry not sorry<3 ). i am also down for alllll the connections, the more drama and angst the better lol. hit me up if you’d like to plot or like this and i’ll come to you!

[ triggers: bad parenting tw, mental abuse tw, ]

GENERAL INFORMATION.

NAME → amara quinn monette NICKNAMES → mara, am, or ams AGE → twenty-six DATE OF BIRTH → october 28th PLACE OF BIRTH → springhill, nj, usa EDUCATION → high school ged ZODIAC → scorpio GENDER → female ORIENTATION → pansexual, demiromantic RELIGIOUS VIEWS → atheist

PHYSICAL ATTRIBUTES.

FACE CLAIM → isabel durant HEIGHT → 5'4" WEIGHT → 128 lbs HAIR COLOR → blonde EYE COLOR → blue BODY TYPE → thin, athletic

FAMILIAL INFORMATION.

FATHER → utp monette ( WC ) MOTHER → evelyn monette YOUNGER SISTER → utp monette ( WC )

EX-HUSBAND → utp ( WC )

PERSONALITY.

POSITIVE TRAITS → venturesome, determined, cultured, & perceptive  NEGATIVE TRAITS → possessive, spiteful, dramatic, & oversensitive  INTERESTS → dancing, cooking, photography, flower pressing, yoga, dogs, & caffeine  DISLIKES → humblebraggers and name droppers, people who talk during movies, people who say ‘you look tired’, & willful ignorance AESTHETICS → being up before the sun, the sound of skates on fresh ice, a vintage polaroid camera, a delicious smell coming from the kitchen, & a strong red wine.  MORAL ALIGNMENT → chaotic neutral PERSONALITY TYPE → ENFP-T ( the campaigner )

BACKSTORY.

❦ amara monette was born and raised in spring hill, new jersey to a marine biologist and local contractor. her family has always been fairly well known in town as her father has been quite a pillar in the community and his company has done a lot of work for the town. her only sibling is six years younger than her and the two sisters have been like oil and water since the beginning and have never been able to see eye to eye on anything.

❦ the monette family dynamics could easily be categorized as dysfunctional but in amara’s eyes, that term is putting it lightly. there’s never been any doubt in the eldest daughter’s mind that she was an unplanned accident—a fact she’d gotten her mother to admit after heavy plying with wine when she was only a young teen. “if we didn’t have you, I could still be doing what I love.” her mother blathered drunkenly.

❦ the only person who didn’t treat her like that—as though she’d ruined their life—was her father, though due to his work, he spent more time out of the house than with his family. unlike her mother or sister, the one thing her father always did was encourage amara. remind her that no matter what she was striving for, it was possible and just within reach.

❦ the bond amara shared with her father was special, just as the bond her sister shared with their mother was special. though her sister also shared a loving, positive bond with BOTH of their parents and what amara shared with their mother was anything but positive or loving.

❦ at the age of four, her mother enrolled her in ballet classes hoping to teach the rambunctious little girl some discipline. much to her mother’s surprise, mara fell in love with dance immediately. but ballet, or dance in any such capacity, hadn’t been apart of her mother's ultimate plan for her. the following year, despite all the crying and protests from her daughter, the wannabe ballerina found herself being taught to ice skate.

❦ she didn’t particularly enjoy skating, not like the other girls she trained with did, but amara succeeded in ways many of them couldn’t over the years. her indifference to the sport and at being the best had given her an edge above the competition. and the more naturally gifted she proved to be at the sport, the further her mother pushed amara and the more intense the training became. as she got older she managed to convince her mother to let her enroll in dance classes once more if only to help in the long run, she’d say. it was in those moments, those classes, that she felt most at peace. as though she’d found just where she was meant to be—or what she ought to be doing. she’s never stopped dancing since.

❦ at the age of nine, her mother had her pulled out of school to be privately tutored so she could spend more time on the ice—her mother only had one goal and she never let amara forget it. the olympics. though before her mother had the chance to remove her from school, the blonde had already made the best friend she could ever ask for. ( WC )

❦ it wasn’t until years later, at thirteen, she discovered that her mother had been forcing her down the same path she’d been set on as a girl. whereas her younger sister found herself free to pursue whatever interests she’d like, amara found herself on a rink shaped prison. and the unwavering pressure her mother applied only made it feel as though her ice space was forever shrinking.

❦ amara spent a majority of her youth and teens training, both on and off the ice, and whatever little free time she had left was spent with her small group of friends. friends her mother disliked for the most part and did all she could to keep her daughter away from. forcing amara to spend time with the other skaters in her class at every turn. not that she’d ever been able to fit in with them even if she wanted to. ( WCs )

❦ becoming a legal adult and dreaming of what it would finally be like to have the freedom she’d always longed for was just about all the blonde could do to keep moving forward. to keep her mother from truly bringing him down. but the relentless pressure from the cold-hearted woman and the fact that she showed no signs of letting up or letting amara walk away if she so desired to caused her to finally crack just a few months shy of her eighteenth birthday.

❦ like a thief in the night, amara disappeared from her parents home taking as many of her belongings with her as she could carry, save for all her skating gear. she spent several weeks sleeping on the couches of different friends while hiding from her mother and whatever wrath she intended to unleash for her missing so much ice time and standing up the coaches her parents paid plenty of money for.

❦ it was in those weeks of solitude that amara discovered what skating actually meant to her and just how much she still needed it in her life. the seventeen-year-old realized that she wasn’t as ready to hang up her skates as she previously thought and that there was still a thing or two she could learn from being on the rink.

❦ amara returned to the ice on the sole condition that her mother would let her do things her own way and would stop projecting her own regrets and more importantly wants on her daughter. things began to look up after that for the monette family in more ways than one and dysfunction that had once been so deeply rooted began to dissolve away just a bit. ( not so much between the sister lol, mostly just amara and her mom )

❦ she moved out on her own not long after, eager to have a life of her own as best she could, but being as clueless and willing to trust as she was, amara made many mistakes and gave her heart away much too easily which only led to it being crushed repeatedly by those who weren’t worthy of safeguarding it, to begin with. ( WCs )

❦ at twenty-one, after only dating for about a year amara married the man she believed was the one. however, it didn’t take her long to see just how incredibly wrong she was and the relationship was more toxic than anything else. she filed for divorce ten months later. ( WC )

❦ amara continued skating in hopes of making the olympic team—but this time the dream truly belonging to her, which seemed to pay off as she managed to do so successfully twice in 2014 and again in 2018. the blonde got a bronze medal in 2014 and didn’t place at all in 2018 after taking a nasty fall during her long program and making the mistake of not taking enough overall risks to make up for it. spooked after the olympic fall that nearly ended her entire career, amara decided to stop skating at a competitive level.

❦ in the following years, amara found herself joining several different national ice-skating tours but couldn’t quite shake the feeling of how far she’d fallen and how demeaning her life now seemed, skating for nothing more than mere amusement. unsatisfied and upset upon coming to the conclusion there was nothing else she could truly exceed at, amara took up the mantle that countless other incredible skaters also had, coach. a rewarding job that’s more or less left her at peace.

OTHER IMPORTANT INFO.

❦ growing up, she was the most curious of children, constantly asking questions and wanting to know more about anything and everything. as the years passed, her curiosity never quite fizzled out as her parents as hoped. instead, the small blonde just became more confident in her ability to get the answers she sought and more determined to have it when a person wasn’t forthright with her. it’s something that leads her to trouble too often as she’s brought on a whole new meaning to the idea of questioning authority.

❦ amara can be quite a master of deceit and manipulation if she’d like. she gets a sort of amusement out of playing games with people and confusing them, especially with those she doesn’t get on well with. she definitely has a few different faces and is very particular about when she wears which face. her sweet face, where she’s likely to try and charm the pants off people, is the face she wears most of the time when interacting with strangers or just the general public. few people have ever seen her at her truest and those who have are either the ones she trusts most or the ones who’ve crossed her in unforgivable ways.

❦ anyone who knows amara is aware of how jealous or possessive she can be of those in her life she cares for. she’s never been able to quite help herself and isn’t afraid to make her feelings known when she feels her relationships have been infringed upon in any way. making friends and building relationships has always been something she’s struggled with as her childhood wasn’t normal in any sense. all her time after school was spent training—on or off the ice. and when she wasn’t training she was home with her family who she didn’t quite mesh with.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

childhood best friend

ex-husband

father

younger sister

old friends —

new friends

rivals

exes / flings

i’m here for it allll!

#about amara.#springhillintro #bad parenting tw #mental abuse tw

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husheduphistory · 5 years

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Legacy Lost: The Tortured First Family of St. Louis Lager

Johann "Adam" Lemp arrived in St. Louis, Missouri in 1838, one of the thousands of new faces pouring into the country in the decades before the Civil War. He was originally from Germany and while in his home country he learned the art of brewing beer from his father, a skill he carried with him to his new home. Arriving in the United States, Lemp aspired to be a grocer but within a few years the entire trajectory of his life and the lives of his family made the first of many sharp turns. The first turn brought fortune to the Lemp name, but the others made it synonymous with tragedy.

While making a living as a grocer two of Lemp’s best selling products were his homemade vinegar and beer. The German population around St. Louis was booming and one thing that the region lacked was authentic German lager, a void that Lemp recognized and knew he was capable of filling. The light, golden drink was a welcome alternative to English ales and within two years Lemp was able to close his grocery store for bigger and better things. He built a small brewery, Western Brewery, at 112 South Second Street unofficially igniting the brewing industry in St. Louis and cementing his path to unimaginable wealth.

Lemp sold his beer in a small bar attached to his brewery but before long the demand for the beverage outgrew his buildings. The brewing operation needed more space and the solution came in the form of another structure that had been around since long before the Lemp family, St. Louis, or even Missouri, was born. Just south of the city limits were limestone caves and the cave’s climate combined with ice farmed from the nearby river provided the perfect atmosphere for the lager process. Lemp’s business thrived and in August 1862 Adam Lemp died a multi-millionaire, passing his empire to his son, William J. Lemp.

The 1860s and 1870s were hugely transformative times for the Lemp family. In 1864 William Lemp built a new plant for the brewery covering five city blocks and connecting to the caves where his family brand of beer was perfected. He continued to expand the company, becoming the largest single-owner brewery outside of New York City. In 1867 his son William Jr. was born. He would have five more children, but it was his fourth son Frederick, born in 1873, who was William’s favorite and who he planned to have inherit the family business. In 1868 William Lemp’s father-in-law had built a thirty-three room mansion close to the brewery and William Lemp and his family moved in in 1876. The mansion served as both a home and a satellite office with tunnels connecting the basement to the limestone caves. As the 1800s came to a close the Lemp family was the picture of wealth, success, and power. It was a prosperous, happy time for the Lemp family, just before it all crashed down around them.

The Lemp Mansion circa 1982.

Postcard showing the sprawling Lemp brewery complex.

The first tragic blow to St. Louis’s most prominent family occurred on December 12th 1901 when Frederick, William’s favorite son and heir to the family business, unexpectedly died of heart failure at the age of only twenty-eight years old. The effect on William was instant, rendering him despondent and marking the beginning of a slow decline. After the death of Frederick the elder Lemp became disconnected, anxious, and he stopped going out in public, placing himself into a self-imposed and tormented solitude. The spirit of William Lemp was still broken on New Years Day 1904, the day his closest friend Frederick Pabst passed away. Lemp fell deeper into disconnect and became indifferent to the everyday operations of his business and family. On the morning of February 13th 1904 William J. Lemp Sr. walked into his bedroom and shot himself in the head.

William J. Lemp Sr.

Newspaper story covering the suicide of William J. Lemp.

With the elder William Lemp and his brother Frederick gone the brewing business passed into the hands of William Jr., also called “Billy”, a man who most say was far better at partying and manipulation than running the family business. In 1899 William married Lillian Handlan and they welcomed their son, William J. Lemp III in September 1900, only four years before he was handed the brewery under the unfortunate circumstances of his father’s suicide. While Lemp cultivated the image of a hard partyer who did only what he pleased, his wife Lillian was coined with the nickname of the “Lavender Lady” due to her obsession with the color that took over her clothing, accessories, and even her horse’s harnesses. Lillian was surrounded by luxury, but it was forced upon her. Billy was forever hosting lavish late-night parties filled with friends, alcohol, and prostitutes, and he soon grew tired of his wife. Looking to keep her out of the picture Lemp began demanding that his wife shop on a near constant basis, giving her $1,000 a day and telling her that if she did not spend it he would never give her another cent. Finally, in 1908 Lillian filed for divorce from Billy citing desertion, cruelty, and indignities. The highly publicized divorce proceedings were a huge scandal in the St. Louis region and crowds gathered at the courthouse eager to hear the horrid details of the Lemp home. What prying ears could not pick up from outside the courthouse the eyes devoured from all the regional newspapers who dedicated their front pages to the ordeal. On day eleven in court Lillian, the Lavender Lady, appeared wearing solid black and before she left she was granted sole custody of the pair’s son.

William J. “Billy” Lemp Jr.

Lillian Handlan Lemp.

Billy Lemp built a less than flattering reputation for himself for many reasons but there is one part of his life that has never been able to be fully confirmed. Allegedly, one of Lemp’s many affairs led to a second son being born. The child was said to have Down Syndrome and because of this he was shuttered into the attic of the Lemp Mansion, never to be seen or heard. When interviewed in later years former employees of the family claim that there was in fact a secret son sequestered to living in the attic and servant quarters but there has never been any documentation found definitively proving his existence.

The Lemp family was beginning to enter even darker days but a small glimmer of happiness arrived in 1910 when Elsa, the youngest daughter of William Sr., married Thomas Wright, president of the More-Jones Brass and Metal Company. Amid the celebration there was a pallor of concern. Several years earlier in 1906 nine of the largest breweries in the St. Louis region combined to form the Independent Breweries Company and created a level of competition the family had never faced before. Billy Lemp continued to run the business as best he could, but he had no way of knowing the blows set to strike both his business and his family before the next decade arrived.

The first bit of bad news came in 1918 when Elsa and her husband first separated and then entered into a messy divorce in February 1919 citing cruelty and damage to her physical and metal wellbeing. This was unfortunate but the next hardship to hit the Lemp family extended far beyond their local courthouse, Prohibition had arrived.

The Lemp brewery was struggling before Prohibition but the movement officially hammered the nails into the business’s coffin. The family created a brand of non-alcoholic beer but already wildly wealthy, Billy Lemp saw no reason to even attempt to keep the brewery afloat. The employees of Western Brewery were made aware that their jobs were gone when they arrived at work one day to find the buildings locked. The closing of the brewery took a toll on Billy Lemp but he was not the only member of his family who was feeling themselves slip away. Elsa and her ex-husband Thomas reunited and remarried in March 1920. Within days, on March 20th 1920 Elsa, the wealthiest heiress in St. Louis, entered the bedroom of their home, sat in bed, and shot herself in the head just as her father had done sixteen years earlier.

Elsa Lemp Wright.

Newspaper story covering the suicide of Elsa Lemp Wright.

As the Prohibition years moved forward the Lemp family and their massive brewery complex continued to deteriorate. As the head of the business Billy was tasked with the liquidation of assets and he began to auction off the buildings and sell any trademarks. At its peak the Lemp brewery consisted of twenty-seven buildings, covered ten city blocks, and was valued at seven million dollars. On June 28th, 1922 it was all sold at auction to International Shoe Co. for $588,500. One piece of the ruined family legacy that they fiercely held onto was the family mansion. In a turn that closely resembled his father after the death of Frederick, after the death of the brewery Billy became reclusive, anxious, increasingly ill, and began to shun appearing in public. Six months after the sale on December 29th 1922 Billy went into his office on the main floor of the mansion and took his own life with a gunshot to the heart.

Newspaper covering the suicide of Billy Lemp.

With Billy, Elsa, and Frederick Lemp all deceased there were only three other siblings remaining to take over the family home. Charles, Edwin, and Louis all removed themselves from the brewery in its later years with Charles leaving in 1917 to go into banking and Edwin retiring in 1913 to live quietly in Kirkwood, Missouri dedicating his time to charitable causes. In 1929 Charles Lemp took up residency in the old family mansion where he lived with his dog, two servants, an unrelated married couple, and allegedly the hidden son of his brother Billy.

Charles may have been removed from the family home and business but he was not immune from the turmoil that had plagued his father and siblings. During his time in the mansion he became incredibly bitter an increasingly obsessive about germs, constantly washing his hands and never without a pair of gloves to protect himself. In 1931 his brother Louis died of natural causes and it is said that during Charles’s stay in the mansion Billy’s secret son died inside the home in his 30s. In April 1941 Charles penned an unusual letter to a St. Louis funeral home stating that in case of his death his body was to be taken directly to the Missouri Crematory with no change of clothing or bathing to take place. He went on to instruct that his ashes were to be put inside a wicker box and buried on his farm with no funeral or notice to the public about his death. Eight years later on May 9th 1949 he wrote another note reading: “St. Louis Mo/May 9, 1949, In case I am found dead blame it on no one but me. Ch. A. Lemp". After writing the note he first shot his dog in the basement and then walked up to the second floor of the mansion where he shot himself in the head. He was found the next day, still holding the gun in his hand.

Newspaper covering the suicide of Charles Lemp.

With Billy, Elsa, Charles, Louis, and Frederick gone the last remaining Lemp was Edwin. Quiet and reclusive, Edwin never moved into the mansion and after the death of Charles it was sold and turned into a boarding house. Edwin lived until the age of ninety when he died of natural causes in 1970. Among his last wishes was that all of the family’s collected art pieces, documents, and Lemp family artifacts be destroyed. A butler fulfilled his wishes, burning everything that remained and reducing it to dust along with the legacy of the Lemp family.

The Lemp mansion had a difficult existence after the demise of its founding family. Tenants were difficult to keep and the building fell into disrepair. It was not until 1975 that the building was purchased by a member of the Pointer family and turned into a restaurant and inn.

Today the Lemp Mansion still stands at 3322 De Menil Place in St. Louis, Missouri where it hosts private events, weddings, holiday events, tours and offers delicious dinners year round to hungry visitors. The site is intensely historic, but it is also allegedly one of the most haunted locations in America with regular sightings and experiences from both employees and visitors. For the brave of heart, the Lemp Mansion offers overnight stays and ghost tours where the tragic story of the Lemp family is explained, explored, and investigated.

When Adam Lemp arrived from Germany in 1838 he was just looking for a livelihood and instead found a route to power and fortune beyond his wildest dreams. The Lemp family had a meteoric rise in the United States, but the fall was absolutely devastating with the fortune, alcohol, and entire family, being washed away by their own blood.

The Lemp Mansion.

Relics of the Lemp brewery complex still standing today.

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incursionofthedamnedrpg · 5 years

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Name: Scarlett Lynch Birthday: December 12th (26) Species: Werewolf Lookalike: Deborah Ann Woll Availability: Taken

Personality

Above all else are Scarlett’s maternal instincts. When she didn’t know a thing about herself or where her life was going, being a mother was all she was confident in. For this reason she wears her heart on her sleeve and is open and eager to share it with others. Oftentimes she overshares because of it which can cause people to zone out or completely disregard what she says after a certain point. She needs a strong spirited opposition to keep her thoughts in check and those are the kinds of people she usually gravitates toward. When she gets lost i her head she relies on these people to pull her out. Despite being kind hearted, she is protective of her loved ones and her morals. Brave to a fault, she insists she can do things on her own even if she is out matched simply because she dreads moving backwards and becoming dependent again. Her condifence is limited and easily spent.

Past

Scarlett is a natural born werewolf who grew up in Abingdon, Virginia. Despite both her parents having the werewolf gene, the family did not belong to a pack. Scarlett was always significantly weaker than the other wolves she came in contact with because they were usually a part of larger packs and this made her often feel unsafe and incompetent. It is because the family was rogue and unaligned that her father found himself at the end of a hunter’s barrell. She imagines he was then wielded above his fireplace, but the detail slipped her mind when she was young. After the death of her father, Scarlett vowed to never be weak, to never allow herself to suffer the same fate as her father. Of course, the effect on his death had on her mother was greater and more detrimental. She soon became mentally unstable, stricken at the loss of her husband. She grew paranoid and wary of any possible dangers, she projected these irrational fears onto her daughter and forced the young girl to train harder and harder until Scarlett physically couldn’t anymore.

As a teenager, she was so intimidatingly strong that her classmates were afraid to talk to her and over time she learned to accept and embrace the solitude. She spent recesses reading books about combat strategies or running laps. Her mother did not allow her to participate in after school activities out of fear that someone would hurt her, or kill her, and Ruthie’s mother wouldn’t be there to protect her beloved daughter. For many years, Scarlett and her mother would slip out into the night and take the lives of hunters- whether they posed a legitimate threat to them or not. As a young girl untriggered, she went through a drastic change. Despite the pain of ripping through her mortal skin, she found herself stronger, better. Everything she’d ever dreamed of. However, this only made the targets on their backs larger and they became overwhelmed, so they fled to Roanoke in the hopes of starting a new life

But a close knit group of hunters, family of those they had killed, were still on their trail and chased them over 200 miles to their new home. In a battle easily lost by them two, her mother lost her life. Immediately, Scarlett dropped to her knees above her mother’s corpse and awaited her death. Before her end, she was met with strong pack of wolves whom appeared from the darkness of the sleeping town and scared off the remaining hunters. Never before had she experienced the loyalty of her kind, or of a pack. She was whisked away by a man named James who would soon become her mentor and father of her child. Scarlett soon learned to ground herself and live a relatively normal life. With the help of her then fiancé, they had a family she was proud of and felt the need to protect with the same fierceness her own parents had.remained wary of within the pack mentality. A momentary relief from the spell she was put under by James’ abusive rule encouraged her to pack her things, her son and set out for the first town she could find. Unfortunately, she stumbled upon Mystic Falls.

Present

Securing a job at a lawfirm as a paralegal, Scarlett has found her feeting again. She is self assured in her life, career and specie. Through the help of Mystic Falls exposure she doesn’t shy away from the supernatural, she is not fearless but she is always curious. Although she’d lost two sort of families, she’s found a new one in Astrid and Mason. Now that Mason is the alpha of her pack, The Paxons, she hopes to foster a healthier and more prosperous life for all of them.

Connections

James Flint

Ex-fiance, left him and the pack suddenly and took their son. Had a relationship that eventually dawned on her as nothing more than owing him a debt. Dealt with mistreatment until she eventually took herself and Levi away from the situation. Killed by Mason.

Mason Duval

Her now boyfriend and first genuine love of her life. Although they’re not always together in the traditional sense of the word, she is only ever after him or waiting for him. She’s been drawn to him since they first met eyes.

Astrid King

Close friend/near sister both by choice and by association with Mason. Their friendship stands on its own as she genuinely feels enlightened and endeared by her company. Works for her at the shelter as a compliance manager on weekends.

#taken oc #oc #oc female #female oc #tf #female #taken #werewolf #deborah ann woll fc #scarlett lynch

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inappropriatefangirlneeds · 6 years

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Gotham s4ep21 “One Bad Day” Personal Review

“It´s an odd time for a nap” Warning spoilers below

* “Oh, Jim, you still think that you're the only one who can save the city.” Okay that one was lovely. Almost a bit like that one Pirates of the Caribbean movie. I love how everyone was vaguely rooting for the same thing: Save the City! while trying to as well reach their own personal goals. > LUCIUS FOX of course is the precious cinnamon roll that he is and just wants to save the city. > JIM GORDON kind of just wants to save the city as well. But I do think this whole talk with Edward, as entertaining as it was it was jarring plot wise. Of course we do have the “We're gonna settle this. No, Jim. This isn't the GCPD. Here, I make the rules, so we're not gonna do this until we talk about what I want to talk about.” line that claims Edward is the one that wants to discuss relationship stuff while Jim is the one who wants to stick to saving the city. But Jim actually brought as much into the conversation as Ed did. Especially if he indeed thinks Leslie is just using Edward he should have just kept this to himself and let Edward run into his misery and laugh about it over the whiskey into which he usually cries. But for Jim it´s at least as important as it is for Ed to plant his flag in that conversation. He´s still asserting “ownership” (for the lack of a better word..) over Leslie Thompkins by claiming he knows her better than Ed does. Ed might have the relationship and the sex but Jim still got the connection to who Leslie really is, ha ha take that Ed (to be read in Jim´s voice.) > TABITHA GALAVAN worries about the city, BUTCH GILZEAN doesn´t comment it but both want a cure for Butch. > BARBARA KEAN was really endearing in the scene with Jerome. She goes from “not really??!” to “absolutely not on my watch”, her personal stake in it was being nice to Tabitha. How Sweet. > OSWALD COBBLEPOT is a bit more used to situations like this. He´s just keeping an eye on his goals: Money. While waving the city issue aside “Of course not” just to scramble and struggle and scurry to do all he can to make things better once they went astray. > LESLIE THOMPKINS want´s her “legal knots untangled” and of course save the city as well. It´s a win win thing. “We solve it and we trade the information for clemency.” “I'm trying to protect what we've built.” > EDWARD NYGMA is bound to act in Leslie´s interest “Well, then the mayor would be wise to forgive Lee and I our indiscretions.” But he´s in fact kind of the only one to declare that he personally doesn´t give a damn about Gotham. “If Gotham becomes a rock pile, I mind zero percent. I'm only helping you because I'm with Lee now.” The situation is however one that he´s trying to use to figure out more about his nagging “does Lee even like me” question. > Oddly the show sent BRUCE WAYNE on a much more personal quest this week. By getting him out of the GCPD he´s separated from the Save Gotham plotline. Of course you could say everything that´s against Jeremiah could be useful for that other goal but there´s a split. SELINA KYLE also is just there to “be there for Bruce” what a muffin. * “I almost got killed fighting your ex-boyfriend's rotting corpse.” Everyone is so nice and grown up to each other. I don´t like the whole Tabs, Babs, Butch relationship mess but I really like how they keep treating each other. BARBARA KEAN sees how important BUTCH GILZEAN is to TABITHA GALAVAN and just a small reminder how Tabitha was there for her is more than enough to have her agree to helping her. JIM GORDON and LESLIE THOMPKINS agree that the past changed things but they still care for each other and respect each other. As icky as the whole situation including Edward Nygma is (rant above and below), that is sweet. Then the third trifecta is SELINA KYLE also despite all the ups and downs being there for BRUCE WAYNE and even explicitly voicing this! It´s not a I hate you but I´m here. It´s also a unmistakable I like you. Progress. And while we´ve had all those unusual little moments of agreement between Alfred and Bruce we have ALFRED PENNYWORTH acknowledge her by basically asking her to stay for dinner. Sweet. So JEREMIAH VALESKA and BRUCE WAYNE. I´m not feeling it > Jerome still tries to tell everyone he´s better than his brother and saneTM. “Are you out of your mind?!” “Why do you keep insisting I'm insane? What's insane about having a backup plan?” / “I'm nothing if not sane. And reasonable. Two things my brother never valued. Which is why I'll be successful where he failed. Well, that and being vastly more intelligent.” > He´s then again acknowledging that his brother was right that there was something inside of him. “Jerome gave me what I thought was the worst day of my life. But only by losing everything was I able to face what was inside me. And I believe I've seen something very special inside of you as well. But to free it, you'll have to lose everything and everyone you hold dear.” > I feel vaguely remembered of how RA´S wanted to kill everyone that Bruce loved to change him. > While talking to Selina Kyle Bruce wonders if that one day made part of him insane and if Jeremiah saw this and wanted to bring it out. I somehow could not care less. I don´t really feel medias obsession with that “beast/evil inside man” or whatever. Like just don´t? Even Jeremiah made an effort to “just don´t”, and it would have worked if it weren’t for him getting poisoned. That´s hardly relevant. > Then we have RA´s AL GHUL and Jeremiah both obsessing over Bruce Wayne and teaming up. Okay. > On a side note: Ra´s what good are your visions if you have to makes sure yourself that they happen? How´s that different from you know ordinary people, usually that´s called having an idea.

* “Ah, Lucius. It's making some kind of weird noise.” “What kind of a noise?” “A bad one, and and it's it's, uh, getting all glowy.” HARVEY BULLOCK so we got the message that mob mentality wise the GCPD is still pissed because of the Pyg scenario and blames Harvey. But all it takes to get them clapping again is some (dumb) luck of choosing the right 50% option. Okay, okay and the willingness to run up to a bloody bomb. But to be fair all the police still in the city took kind of the same risk, so we are down again to the luck thing. Look, I love Harvey. But the dynamics of “followers”, including the Valeska ones on this show are just ridiculous. * “Detective. Don't lie to me.” “It's not looking good, kid.” Harvey keeping to lie to himself about Jim´s likely demise was sweet though. Also hooray for another case of directly addressing an issue (Does it show that I´ve been around too much passive aggressiveness lately, and tbh struggle with that myself .. ) * “Leave Gotham. Start a new life somewhere else. Alone.” JIM GORDON telling LESLIE THOMPKINS that she should leave Gotham and should start a new life again (2x15). Like that one time when he already did, and she left and started a new life and then Jim shot her husband. Am I a bit sensitive here or is that additional “alone” kind of not okay? Like it feels like an implied if Jim can´t have her no one should. She´s been through so much and has done so much that she´s not worth anything more than a life in solitude? Like I get why Jim would think that Leslie couldn´t have feelings for Edward (and I agree #Kristen #framedJimlostchild etc) but hey how about she might think it´s nice that someone is around that cares about her, and even is ready to suppress his own narcissistic goals and ways for the sake of her.. While the scene with EDWARD NYGMA and Jim Gordon tattling about Leslie was funny I hate it in terms of plot. And if Leslie & Ed´s split is going to be about Jim Gordon or in general a “this is my wifey” conflict I´m gonna murder someone. There´s already been plenty of tension in between them before they mashed Jim into this. This could be about Leslie´s ambitions and goals. As much as I´m kind of meh about the whole atoning for her Virus related sins (or her injecting herself the virus in the first place .. ) thing I like that her character got a goal in doing god (even if they haven´t really shown how she wants to reach a better situation for her people in a way that does even seem slightly plausible) while at the same getting some badass scenes and now I fear this is going to be pushed to the background for the sake of everything being about Leslies feelingz. Nothing wrong with emotions but how about we can get her not being about her feels for men and about her feels for what she thinks is her duty. * JIM GORDON got some advanced phone trolling going on. Him being on screen just like the Valeska´s before is almost as good as him keeping hanging up on Jervis Tetch. * And “A PALE imitation of Jerome” how on earth could he drop that one with a straight face :D * “It doesn´t matter” What kind of crap interlude was the SCARECROW scene? Like I appreciate the view, thanks. I also very much relate to just abandoning the task once it turns out to be more difficult than expected. Like a girl against three villains who would have guessed that much trouble. But that´s just a waste of a potentially so interesting character. Like do something with that beanpole of terror Gotham! But hey .. at least his lack of commitment to the task DID in fact matter in the end! * And srsly why is the one that got tortured going to make dinner? I get that none of the three had an easy day so how about just ordering some food? ALFRED honey make that shower a very long hot and bubbly bath, that´s the least. * On another side note: Why did they spare Alfred? Why have a stand in? Why keep Alfred alive? Did they have something more sinister planned? Bruce killing real Alfred 2.0? * “ You do realize the city is about to be blown up? It's an odd time for a nap. “You know that she drugged me.” “Yeah. Don't really care.” * Think. Think. Think, think, think, think, think, think” * “ sighs You're behind me, aren't you?” * “Would you believe it? They put me on hold.” Whoever wrote JERMIAH´s lines, bless you. They are so polite, polished and yet vaguely unsettling. I love them. Of course bless Cameron as well! * “I hope you didn't catch a cold in my brother's grave. I know those things aren't exactly designed for the living.” * “No, not Alfred” Oh hello there Theo Galavan, long time no see .. they really refuse to do the “beautiful morning” thing with Theo (Aka you can´t have a dying character talk about something going to be a beautiful morning 2x11 and then have them be revived 3x6 and not have them say something like oh what a beautiful morning or not as beautiful as expected) but then repeat that one line with another character ??! Gotham?! * Oddly it´s even nice to see Oswald getting a dose of what others that went against him had to put up with buuut .. let´s get back to Oswald having the great Plan B´s n stuff again soon pls

#gotham #gotham meta #gotham s4ep21 One Bad Day #edward nygma #jim gordon #mine Gotham full episode reviews

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i-did-not-mean-to · 3 years

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Chapter 2

I don't know if any of my posts show up under the tags, but I keep trying...

So, here's the second chapter of my WIP on Ao3...

°2° ~Victoria~

As she sipped her scalding hot tea, Victoria glanced up with a startled twitch when the small bell hanging over the door resounded with its high-pitched chime, announcing another visitor to the tearooms.

Usually, it was very quiet so soon after lunchtime and Victoria’s annoyance only increased as she did not enjoy the prospect of having idle witnesses sit by while Angie sprang whatever trap she had come up with on her.

Angie was the sweetest person on this earth, and utterly incapable of lying convincingly, which meant that Victoria was very keenly aware of the fact that some obscure and potentially nefarious plot had been set in motion and that she was most probably the subject and victim of said plan.

Being summoned to the tearoom outside of her usual visiting hours had been the first indicator, but Angie’s flushed face sealed the deal for good. She had hatched out something, probably with Liza, and it made Victoria nervous that she had not even the slightest inkling when it came to the precise nature of her wrongdoing that was to be remedied.

Was it her clothes? She looked down on the short grey skirt and the fluffy sweater she was wearing, finding nothing wrong with their sober, clean aspect. She did not look like she was about to step onto the red carpet, but she presented no offense by being either sloppy or indecently dressed, did she?

The newcomer turned out to be none other than Liza, her dark skin glistening impossibly smooth over a red jumper that made her look positively incandescent. A twinge of envy rose in Victoria as she observed the perfectly applied make-up and the endlessly long legs in tight jeans of the other woman as she strolled towards her, looking out of place and exotic in this quaint little décor.

“Vic!” Even her voice was magical, Victoria thought with a sigh, deep and velvety, Liza sounded like an otherworldly creature every time she opened her mouth; a mouth that now curled into a plum-coloured smirk.

Grabbing one of the tiny sandwiches on the tower in front of her friend, Liza sunk down with perfect elegance and grace, nodding at Jenna behind the counter to let her know that she was to call Angie to the fray as well.

“Ah, you’re here. Hello, my love.” Angie rushed out, her dark ginger hair in a messy bun and her cheek dusted with flour.

As they sat across from her, Victoria was more convinced than ever that she was to be led to the slaughter like an Easter lamb and her eyes darted to the door, gauging how probable it was that she would manage to dash towards it and make it out before either one of the other three women coaxed her back into her seat.

“So…I wanted to ask for a favour.” Liza purred, her voice deceivingly liquid and warm as Victoria motioned to her to go on talking. She would not refuse out of hand, not after the immense service of friendship these two had done her after her nasty divorce and her falling out with her own family.

“I have a work function the day after tomorrow and I wanted to ask you if you were interested in accompanying me.”

“Do you need help serving?” Victoria turned to Angie who nodded along with her partner’s words, thinking, quite rightly, that she would probably serve some of her delicious cakes and canapés at this occasion.

“Oh, no, Jenna will be there.” Angie replied evasively, shaking her head almost imperceptibly at the young woman shifting her weight from one foot to the other nervously behind the counter.

“So…what am I doing there?” Victoria asked slowly, her nostrils flaring as if she was trying to catch the scent of a predator, ready to run for her life. “Having fun? Go out?” Liza’s voice grew harder, steel under silk, and Victoria could hear the sword being unsheathed, ringing with fierce glee in her intonation.

So, that was it. Her tendency to stay home and not see anyone or speak to anyone other than the three women in the room presently, Victoria thought. It had been months and they were growing tired of watching her isolate herself.

It was understandable, but they did not know how hard it had been to leave her home and all the things she had thought eternal. She was not ready to make nice and pretend that there was anything good waiting just around the riverbend for her. Moreover, she had been busy enough, binging shows and movies in the privacy of the narrow, little house she had purchased from the first settlement her ex-husband had sent through.

For years, she had not gotten to watch movies as her father thought it frivolous and detrimental to her intelligence and her ex-husband had only ever watched the kind of movies, he fancied himself. Now, on the other hand, she was her own woman and she had used the time wisely, consuming as much silly, ludicrous content as she possibly could between her reading and her long spells of absent-minded sulking.

“I don’t know. What kind of soirée is that?” She asked, cautious, but Liza promised that it was nothing too outlandish even though she was expected to wear formal clothing. “White tie?” – “No gloves.” Liza laughed; she could imagine Vic turning up in gloves and a real fur-stole, dragging a train the length of a full-grown man.

Victoria was still suspicious, but she didn’t want to offend her friends by being too harsh about their invitation, especially as she knew that they were merely worried about her. It might well be that she had withdrawn just a tiny bit too much since arriving on that blasted island her family hated so much and that the streak of pettiness in her had gotten the better of her, but after the blow she had been dealt, who could have really blamed her?

She had been married at the tender age of 20 and, not 10 years later, her husband had decided that she had grown too old and “fat”, those had been the words he had used, to satisfy his needs and his new-found status. After years of devoted service to him and to his idea, after having helped him create the empire of internet sensations that had made him a rich and influential man, she had been returned to her father like a used bike that had grown rusty.

Her father, of course, had not been overly surprised as she had ever been a disappointment to him, just as he himself had been to the stern woman who now lay six feet under, her lips pursed in distaste, no doubt.

Victoria’s mother had been a minor noble who had been sold to a promising young banker, the stuff legends and bad romance novels were made of, and after their wedding, she had given birth to the eternal disappointment of a daughter who couldn’t even be obedient enough to turn out stunning.

No, instead they had gotten a small girl with dark eyes and dark hair and a petulant frown, a child brought up on bitterness and neglect within a house that resembled a museum more than a home.

In the end, her mother had been that disgusted with her own life that she had drunk herself into an early grave, falling to her death in quite an undignified way, and she had been left alone with a man who couldn’t have loved her if his life had depended on it.

No wonder then that she had run off with the first man to show any interest in her and had been discarded for a young, spritely blonde as soon as his luck had turned. And that was how she had ended up in England, seeking refuge and shelter with two women she had met all those years ago during one of the trips her husband and her once had made.

Back when they had been young and curious, in love with the world and each other, a long, long time ago it seemed to Victoria whose tea had grown cold and bitter, just as everything in her life had.

How was she to blame if she no longer wanted to meet any new people? She knew for a fact that she would disappoint them, that she would fall short of their expectations and that another rejection would flat-out kill her.

She needed time to mend, time to heal, time to build up these walls again that the months spent in her father’s house had torn down. Oh yes, her father was not one to hold back from kicking another person when they were down.

He had made his money and his fortune by swooping in, ready for the kill and eager to strike at all times, he could smell a single drop of blood in an ocean, and he would never hesitate to go straight for the jugular.

“Hmmm, alright, I’ll be there if you want me to.” She agreed slowly, tired already, but she owed them that much. Angie and Liza had taken her in, they had helped her find a house in a quiet neighbourhood and they let her sit around and mope endlessly without interrupting her brooding thoughts with chatter and noise.

Liza had given her a job she didn’t need, and Angie let her hang out in the tearoom at all hours of the day without telling her that it was weird for her to just sit there and watch the sun paint pictures on the brick walls shielding the courtyard from prying eyes.

“Maybe, we can get our hair done? It will be nice to feel like we’re actual, real people again.” Liza whooped, relieved that it had been so easy to sway Vic, because she had really thought that she would have to bribe and threaten her friend to come out of hiding.

For a moment, she wondered if she was about to destroy the little strength her friend had found in her months of solitude by throwing her into a situation she wasn’t prepared for, but she still believed that this could be a good thing.

Vic was too young to behave like a scorned woman or a mourning widow, she was too pretty to let her best years go to waste because that nitwit of a man she had married was too blind to see what a treasure she had been and still was.

A flicker of doubt crept into her thoughts as well as they touched on the men Liza would willingly sacrifice on the altar of Vic’s recovery; they were colleagues and partially…almost…friends even, but men were fickle, everybody knew that, and she had little doubt that they would not mind being milked for an ounce of their charm and maybe of other bodily fluids and then shoved aside. Vic was discreet, she would not drag them through the yellow press, Liza was sure about that.

And, if Martin was to be believed, their intended victim could do with a shag as well.

Angie had not been so keen once the plan had been settled for good, Liza remembered, she felt intense empathy for the lonely bachelor they were about to throw into the maw of Vic’s despair.

“How does it heal the pain of being used and discarded to use and discard someone else?” She had asked and Liza had to admit that she was not wrong, but she was almost certain that there would be no pain this time.

At least, she wanted to believe that there wouldn’t be.

~Richard~

Richard was blessedly unaware of the devious plans of his friend as he sat around, trying to get back to the reading he had been immersed in before being torn away from it by that impish call.

He knew that Martin found it peculiar that he felt so terribly awkward at those functions, but he didn’t like being put on the spot and it was tiresome to try and guess what people were expecting from him.

There would be enough other people to distract potential attention away from him, he tried to soothe himself, having gotten the confirmation from Martin that some of those who really had it made in Hollywood would come to pay tribute to a man who had earned his retirement.

Ah, the very great, he thought with a chuckle, knowing much too well that they were all just people and that, contrary to many celebrities from the other side of the pond, an awkward Brit usually stayed just that, even after making millions.

A cold shiver of anticipation rippled down his spine suddenly. Whatever Martin had planned, he was almost certain that he would easily be able to rope in some of those terribly dignified actor colleagues.

If only their fans knew how wickedly mischievous these people really were. It was one thing to be gently mocked by some reporter or by a family friend and another altogether if people like Hiddleston or Cumberbatch joined forces with Martin.

They were much too smart and too cunning to go for an easily recognised and dodged blow, they would hatch out an elaborate plan and even knowing that he should be weary did nothing to help him discern the best path to choose.

Tread carefully, old boy, he warned himself with a sigh. It was clear that he was being goaded and herded into appearing that evening and he almost wished they would just empty a bucket of pig’s blood on his head.

Checking his phone again, he stared for a few seconds at the empty screen. It had surprised him to be called, because that rarely happened. Other than his brother and his agent, nobody had any reason to call him, and he resented that fact for a minute, feeling the loneliness sink into his bones and making him feel more tired than he had before.

He loved his work, but on days like this one, he wished he had spent less time working and more time building friendships and maybe even finding a woman to stay by his side.

No woman would be willing to live this life though, because the endless waiting and the fretting were too much for any good woman to take. They deserved better, Richard was the first to admit it, and it was unfair and selfish to wish him upon any of them like a curse.

Resolutely, he picked up the script again and, almost immediately, his mind started wandering again. This time, it was the feminine handwriting in the margin that attracted his attention and the acid, unflattering comments made him chuckle under his breath. Whoever that woman was, she was certainly not wrong, and he felt intrigued and curious.

Elizabeth had told him that she had asked a friend to go over some of the scripts, but he had not given it any more thought than that before now. He wondered what that woman would be like and what her background was, as she seemed unaware of many of the clichés common in TV.

There was something else as well, a hint of wicked humour and burning impatience, all neatly embedded in a clean, flowing handwriting that so unmistakeably betrayed an expensive but also rather austere education.

Elizabeth…He remembered the gleam in her eyes when she had told him about her friend and about how she might bring her to the soirée if she could convince her to go out. Maybe, he was not the only one being under duress that evening…a comforting thought.

In his mind, he imagined a mousy, shy girl with lank hair and colourless eyes darting behind thick glasses around the room; after all, Elizabeth had said that her friend was loath to leave the house, which made him believe that she might be the introverted, socially inept type of woman who always felt ill at ease among other people.

“You’re projecting, my dear.” A nasty voice in the back of his mind snarled. If he looked the way he felt, the career he had known would have been out of the question, there was no doubt about that.

Then again, that was the reason why it was called acting, it was pretence, it was not real, he was just good at making people believe that he could be all the things that he certainly was not.

Well, he would ask Elizabeth to be introduced to the woman who wanted nothing to do with people and who wrote such witty and clever remarks in the margin of the script he held in his hands. She seemed like a person worth meeting.

#richard armitage #fanfiction #fanfic #longfic #rpf #realfic #romance #romcom #miscommunication #misunderstandings #trauma

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malbrockway-archive-blog · 6 years

Text

Chatzy :: Belonging

Who: Marjorie ( @marjorielimehouse ) and Malcolm ( @malbrockway ) When: Six months ago Where: Rural Evangelical Church; Crownsville Warnings: Religious Homophobia Summary: While attending a church function, Marjorie and Mal have a discussion about the kind of upbringing they want for their son.

Malcolm: It's a lovely day for a church potluck, and the whole congregation seems to have turned out. Most are gathered over by the food; the ladies bedecked in their Sunday best trading local gossip while the men talk business. The children are engaged in a boisterous game of tag, laughing and squealing as they carry on. Malcolm watches in quiet solitude, his chair parked beneath the shade of an old oak tree. He doesn't want to be here--truth be told he only came so that Mark wouldn't be the only child in attendance without their father there--and he's counting down the minutes until he can leave. A flicker of movement catches his attention from the corner of his eye, and he turns his head to spot Marjorie. "...Hey Marjie," he greets softly. "Why aren't ya' over with the others?"

Marjorie stood among the church ladies and she liked them, generally. She really did but ever since she got divorced, they were strange around her. They didn't approve of it, she knew and no one understood why they divorced. She was glad that they didn't though, because if they knew about her sexuality, things would be even more awkward and really, she wasn't strong enough to stand up to them if they were negative about who she was. She didn't want to feel the shame she felt years ago anymore, but she did, even though they hadn't said anything. She knew what they thought. The same as her father. She had only come because she believes church is important in Mark's life. He has friends here, people treat him nicely and he has learned to speak a few words from the other kids and the sermons. She'd still be glad to be out of here, though.

She looked over at the oak tree and saw her husband. Even after all they'd been through, she still loved him in a platonic way she'd much rather be around him than the other mothers, so she walked over to him and smiled at him. "Hey, Mal." She told him as she walked closer to her husband. She still wasn't used to having to look down at him. "I just... I ain't got that much in common with them. Besides, ya' know they've been treatin' us weird after we split. I only come to the social church events for Mark." She told him and glanced at her son, talking to a child who looked quite puzzled. Mark didn't realize that people didn't understand what he was saying, so he just talked on in sounds that didn't sound like words at all. The kids didn't mind though, they just nodded and then helped him play the game they were playing. It was nice to see.

Malcolm: She steps near, and for an instant he thinks he catches a whiff of her perfume on the breeze. For all that he’s changed, these past few years have been kind to Marjorie and Malcolm muses, not for the first time, that she still looks as pretty as the day they wed...right here, at this same little country church. Back then he’d stood a head taller than her. Now, he’s looking up to meet her eyes. “Fuck ‘em.” Mal supplies evenly. He knows all too well about the gossip that spreads like wildfire through small towns like theirs; about what the church ladies whisper about at their Bible studies and why they hide their sneers behind their hands whenever he or Marjorie share a pew during services. “Sometimes I wonder why we even bother comin’ here anymore...” It’s only a half truth--his gaze shifts to where Mark runs, laughing gleefully, as he plays with the other children--he knows damn well why. “They don’t know nothin’, Marjie. I ain’t never said a word about the real reason we split, they’re just judgin’ ‘cause judgin’s what they do.” He shakes his head, “One of these days Mark’s gonna’ start hearin’ it. I don’t want that.”

Marjorie chuckled at her husband's swearing. Something she rarely did. "They ain't particularly my type." She told him, a small smile on her face. She didn't want her sexuality to be this big, bad, serious thing. She wanted to be able to joke about it, though she wasn't sure it would work, she wanted to try anyway. She shrugged at his next comment. "Mark loves it and the ladies do treat him nicely." She said and sighed. "And well, I mean, I come to church on Sundays anyway, so it would be weird not to stay after. Then their tongues would really start wagging." She told him and crossed her arms, as she was slightly chilly. "Thank you, for not sayin' anything. A lesser man would have, to get back at me. I appreciate it, Mal." She told him honestly. "And as for Mark... I think it'll be a while before he really catches on that they don't like us and when he does ask, you know once he learns how to sign better... I would like to explain, you know... why and everythin'. If he wants to know, ever." She said, not sure if her ex-husband would agree.

Malcolm: He shoots Marjorie a look, brow furrowing ever so slightly, but does not dignify his ex-wife’s joke with a response. While he supports her and has accepted the reality of her sexuality, even years later that wound is still just a little bit too raw for him to make light of it so casually. “I know he does,” Mal concedes, deflating a little. Mark’s sense of belonging here is about the only reason he hasn’t told half the congregation to go pound sand. “There ain’t nothin’ t’ get back for, Marjie, an’ I ain’t gonna’ throw the mother of my only child t’ the wolves. You don’t owe me no thanks for doin’ the bare minimum required t’ be a decent human being.” In truth, the consensus around the gossip-mill seems to be that Marjorie left him because of his drinking problem back in those days, and Malcolm is content to let them believe it. “--We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. He’s got enough t’ wrap his head around in this world...I just wanna’ let him be a kid for now, y’know?”

Marjorie cringed as her joke was ignored. She didn't mean to hurt him, she just... didn't want who she was to be something bad but to him it was. That kind of hurt, but she understood it at the same time. She stood next to her ex-husband and placed her hand his shoulder. "Well, I am still really thankful for you not telling anyone about it, even if to you that doesn't mean a lot, it does to me." She told him, squeezed his shoulder slightly and then let go again. She wished that she could still hug him, sometimes, but their relationship had changed so much. From friends, to husband and wife and now co-parents. Hugging just wasn't really what they did anymore. "Of course, I wouldn't just dump all of our issues on him. I was just... telling you what I wanted to do. You're free to disagree, Mal and we can talk about it. I ain't got no problem with that." She told him, with a sigh and was a bit surprised when Mark looked over at them and a beaming smile appeared on his face. Maybe it was because he missed seeing his parents together and that sort of saddened her.

Malcolm: The gentle weight of Marjorie’s hand on his shoulder takes him aback; he’s become so accustomed to the absence of physical affection in his life that it borders upon uncomfortable, and though he does not shrug her off he is relieved when she lets go. “Yeah. Well. It ain’t my secret t’ tell.” He swallows thickly, shifting in his chair to put another centimeter of space between them. “I ain’t sayin’ I disagree, Marjie. I just disagree right now. That boy’s too young an’ innocent for puttin’ our baggage on his shoulders. Yours or mine. He’s already got more’n he should.” Mal catches Mark’s big grin in the distance about the same time that Marjorie does, and feels a familiar weight on his chest. “...He’s the only little one here ain’t goin’ home with his momma’ an’ daddy both.” It isn’t an accusation, but a hint of bitterness tinges his voice.

Marjorie looks at him moving away from her and isn't sure why he does that. Does he hate her, and was she unaware? Was he disgusted by her, now that he knew about her sexuality? She didn't know, and even though she wanted to know she didn't dare ask. "I agree Mark's too young now... I-... It don't matter, we'll deal with it when it comes." She said, feeling quite a bit of resistance from him to talk about how to approach their son's potential questions about their divorce. She wasn't going to push Mal, not now. She looks down at him, at his comment and it cuts her deeper than he probably intends it. She doesn't want her son to be more different than he already has to be because of his condition. She feels like the most selfish person on the planet. It was her that choose to leave. Malcolm nor Mark had asked for it. "Don't... I... I get it, it's my fault. You don't have to rub it in, Malcolm." She said, the hurt evident in her voice.

Malcolm: He heaves a quiet sigh; words of comfort on the tip of his tongue not quite making it out. Marjorie isn’t his to comfort anymore, and he’ll be damned if he’s going to sweeten a hard truth to make it more palatable for her where their son’s well-being is concerned. “I ain’t tryin’ t’ twist no knives here, Marjie, but you don’t get t’ stick your head in the sand an’ pretend it ain’t so. It don’t really matter who’s fault it was, the point is it happened, an’ now he’s surrounded by kids an’ families who ain’t nothin’ like him an sooner or later he’s gonna’ realize it.” He tears his eyes away from Mark, turning his full attention back to Marjorie, “Maybe we don’t got no business bein’ in this crowd no more.”

Marjorie swallowed and shook her head. "Sure you ain't tryin' to twist knives." She said, not convined at all. She shook her head at her husband's words. "He's already different, Malcolm and he'll be different all his life. What is our crowd then? Divorced parents of children with diabilities. We can't hide away our son, nor can we hide away who we are. He loves us... maybe all he wants is a bit more time with both his parents, but this church - even though the people aren't always the greatest - is like a second home to me. I belong here, and Mark likes it here. It isn't perfect, but I ain't cutting this out of his life." She said, calmly but she was convinced. "I ain't hidin' away, and neither should you. We are who we are, and if we just keep bein' us, they'll come around."

Malcolm: Mal frowns, utilizing every last ounce of his self control not to roll his eyes. “Well our crowd sure ain’t hardline Evangelicals who swear from the pulpit every Sunday we’ll be burnin’ in Hell for divorcin’; an’ that ain’t even takin’ into account the real reason why. In case you didn’t notice, there ain’t exactly no rainbow flags flyin’ ‘round these parts.” One hand pushes back through his tangle of dark brown curls, “They’ll come around?” Malcolm echoes, one eyebrow quirking upwards in clear disagreement. He huffs softly, “Marjie, I grew up in this church. My momma’s been the dang Sunday school teacher goin’ on forty years. I know these people, I know what they think an’ what they say...an’ trust me, ain’t none of ‘em comin’ around.”

Marjorie turned to him and breathed hard through her nose, trying to stay calm. "I like my church, and I ain't giving it up. I am a Christian and I like going to church; this church." She said, getting quite riled up. "I don't care if the people in it judge me, I don't need no rainbow flags. I just want the church that I've been comin' to for years, and I want to raise my son in the faith I was raised - right here. If you don't like it, that is fine. Then don't come. You ain't got to protect me no more, Malcolm. If they want to call me names or treat me differently, after our divorce or when they find out about me, I'll deal with it." She ranted, just getting mad at him trashing her church and the people in it. They weren't perfect and she knew that they were being judged and gossiped about, but she loved the nostalgia and the comfort of the church and honestly, who was he to tell her where she could and could not be? It was a church, not a rave.

Malcolm: He quiets as it becomes apparent that he’s struck a nerve--whether she would believe it or not, it hadn’t been his intention, but he won’t apologize for being right. “Marjorie, you’re a grown woman who ain’t my wife no more, so if you wanna’ come here an’ pretend they ain’t sneerin’ behind your back that’s your decision,” Mal flicks his gaze over toward where Mark is playing with the other children and back again, “...But it ain’t all about you. I respect your opinion on the matter, but I’ve got every bit as much right t’ dictate where I want my son goin’, who he’s around, an’ what he’s bein’ taught.” Shaking his head, Malcolm fixes a serious look upon his ex-wife. “This ain’t it.”

Marjorie narrowed her eyes and then, took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. They needed to be rational human beings. "What do you propose then? That we change denominations?" She wondered, not really sure what Malcolm saw as an alternative. She was raised evangelical and while some things she did, and her identity, went against the Bible she still found a lot of comfort in her faith and she was uncomfortable with the idea that her son would be taught something else than she believed. "Besides, are you goin' to control everyone he's around when he's with me? I wouldn't put Mark in harms way. He isn't being wounded here at church, he is a happy little boy. I am not takin' him to a dangerous place." She defended herself.

Malcolm: "Maybe,” Mal says with a shrug. “If that’s what it takes. Different church. Different denomination. Different fuckin’ religion...I ain’t sure.” He’s treading on uneasy ground, even for him--for all his bluster and dark humor Malcolm has always been a devout believer and a dutiful Christian. “Damn it, I ain’t never said nothin’ like that--I know you’d never do nothin’ t’ hurt him, ever--I just...” Frustrated, he finally just blurts candidly, “Marjie, I don’t want him bein’ brought up in a church that’s teachin’ him t’ hate who his momma’ is.”

Marjorie 's shoulder's fell at his last words and sighed, looking down at the ground. She couldn't say she hadn't thought about it. She just didn't think it was fair that she'd have to give up a faith, a denomination that she was so comfortable with and that felt right for her just because she'd discovered that she wasn't heterosexual. She nodded slowly. "I appreciate that Malcolm... But the only denomination that is lgbt friendly, really, is the episcopal church... I don't know if I believe all that anglicans believe... and I mean, it's just unfair that just because of who I'm attracted to, I have to change churches..." She said and sighed. "What do you propose then?" She wondered, just wanting to hear him out.

Malcolm: “I dunno, Marjie.” Malcolm replies defeatedly. There’s a world-weariness about him these days; more than the bags beneath his eyes or the frown lines creasing his face, and for a moment he lets it show through. “I really dunno’. Might be a process, us havin’ t’ go the ‘ol trial an’ error route an’ just see what works for our--” ‘Family’, he almost says, but catches himself, “--situation. But speakin’ from experience, as a little boy growin’ up in this here congregation, it ain’t a good place for learnin’ t’ tolerate an’ accept what’s different. I want better’n that for Mark. He deserves better’n that.” Mal’s gaze fixes upon Marjorie’s left hand; now bereft of the wedding ring she’d worn for so many years before their divorce. “I ain’t never asked you for much, Marjie, but I’m askin’ for this.”

Marjorie: sighed and looked back at the church ladies, the old church and felt an ache in her heart. She loved it here... but maybe Malcolm was right. Maybe they should move on. "Alright... alright, let's try it but I wanna do it together. As a family, because even though we ain't married anymore, Mal... We'll always be Mark's parents and that makes us a family. So can we? I'm sure Mark would love that." She told him, her voice soft, almost pleading.

Malcolm: He follows Marjorie’s line of sight to the gaggle of women gathered over by the dessert table; his own mother and sister-in-law among them. He and Marjorie leaving this church will not go over well with them, he knows, but it certainly won’t be the first time he’s disappointed his family. “Ain’t like we gotta’ be strangers here,” Mal submits gently; a softer side of his usual gruffness that he seems to reserve only for his ex-wife. “But maybe it’d do all three of us some good t’ broaden the horizons a little bit, y’know?” He nods, taking a deep breath, “--Yeah, I guess we oughtta’ do it together for Mark’s sake.”

Marjorie nodded at him and sighed. "Yeah, maybe it's time that we have really start a new chapter of our lives, maybe with a new church that isn't as... narrow-minded." She said, trying to see the positive side of this all. She looked at Malcolm and smiled. "For Mark's sake and for our sake." She added, wanting them not be judged either. They were both looked at differently since they divorced.

~FIN~

#marjorielimehouse #[chatzy :: marjorie & malcolm :: 002]#[past interaction]#tw: religious homophobia

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