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dystopiandramaqueen · 1 year

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Endgame

I'm gonna say something that may be unpopular, but I think it's important.

I've sat with it for a couple weeks and I'm pretty certain that June genuinely loves Luke AND Nick.

June is polyamorous.

Her heart can hold love for more than one person at a time.

It's actually very feminist and progressive and modern of the show to depict a polyamorous female- to allow her to have real feelings for two (2) different humans at the same time.

Traditionally- in many cultures- women were property.

Literally bought and sold. Exchanged for dowries. Traded between fathers and husbands.

"Love" wasn't part of any of it.

If women had sexual intercourse with men other than their husbands- they were shamed and punished.

As long as stories have been passed down, "cheating" women have been vilified.

In The Bible, Adultery is listed In the 10 commandments from the same (male) Judeo-Christian God who watched and said nothing as King David seduced the wife of another man, sending him to his death at the Battle front so he could "have" her.

In the Scarlett Letter, she literally had to wear a visible symbol on her chest for the whole town to see. Permenant, public slut shaming for having felt love for a man other than her husband. HOW DARE SHE!

The Trojan War- depicted in The Odyssey- happens because Helen of Troy takes a lover and leaves her husband. All the nations go to war because a woman chose to take a lover outside her marriage.

Isolde's affair with Tristan and Gwenivere's affair with Lancelot? Forbidden! Their love had to be kept secret from King Mark and King Arthur. When it was discovered, the husbands were devastated. The kingdoms were destroyed. Again, literal death and destruction. She had to choose. She couldn't have both. Her happiness? Not acceptable.

Romeo and Juliet Die bc her family didn't approve of her choice of lover.

Traditional folk songs are full of stories about killing an errant woman. "Mama's in the graveyard, papa's in the penitentiary" "I thought I was her daddy, but she had three more." "I shot that bad bitch down."

The list goes on. You get my point.

I use the past tense... but everything Atwood depicts in The Handmaid's Tale exists in the real world. The oppression in this story isn't fiction, it's history. She did that on purpose.

Atwood wrote The Handmaid's Tale so that modern women wouldn't take the hard-won freedoms we enjoy for granted.

I've read headlines about "Honor Killings" in the middle east- where brothers or fathers kill an errant family member for shaming the family. Still. Happening. Today.

These are the stories we grew up on.

June grew up on those stories too. June feels shame when she's attracted to Nick. In the book, June thinks Luke is dead, but she STILL still feels guilt, and begs Luke's forgiveness in her mind for her "weakness" and "faithlessness."

The show writers depicted this beautifully in June's taped confession to Luke in S3. She admits shame and tells Luke he should also find comfort in another, like she has. She releases him from the bonds of monogamy.

Ok. SO.

A TRADITIONAL story would have one of the following ending options:

June confesses her "sin" to Luke, who would have every right to punish her- with shame or a slap to the face, or divorce.

June returns to Luke as his property, downplaying her affair with Nick. Revoking, forsaking it- to return to the safety of Luke's protection.

June revokes her marriage, saying its over, she doesn't love him anymore, "choosing" Nick. Hiding in the safety of HIS arms. This would undoubtedly provoke a man like Luke to violence. Like the trojan war. Like in the fucking bar in Toronto when Luke shoves Nick.

Luke or Nick die, making the decision for her.

But this is a feminist story, written by a woman. At the end of the Testaments, Atwood has both Luke AND Nick present in June's life.

June doesn't have to choose. She can love and be loved by both.

Our hearts can hold love for more than one person at a time.

It's not hurtful if everyone involved knows about each other.

Luke asks her to contact Nick to help with Hannah.

Nick is aware of and Glad for Luke's help from Toronto in sheltering June once she's out.

There are no secrets, no deception. Just love.

Polyamorous people can still feel jealousy, and hurt- it's not EASY to navigate- but when she's with Luke, she's with Luke. When she's with Nick, she's with Nick.

When she says "I love you" to one, she means it.

It isn't false because she also said it to someone else.

We see in Gilead- what it looks like when women are property. Named for their captors. Of-FRED. Of- Luke. Of-Nick. It is BAD and harmful. To be defined by your captor. To be owned by a man like property.

The Handmaid's Tale is healing and beautiful because June reclaims her freedom by reclaiming her sexual agency. By having sex with Nick "because it feels good" June frees herself, even while she is still a captive.

It's the point of the whole story.

So as we watch her tale play out in Season 6, let's remember that June doesn't have to choose between Luke and Nick. Spoiler alert: according to The Testaments, she won't.

This isn't Twilight. She doesn't have to forsake mortal life and become what Edward is, or lose Edward to be with Jacob.

If the writers were going to force a DEFINITIVE endgame with Nick, they could have killed Luke off twice now. Once while he was detained by border agents, and once when he was fighting the man who ran June over.

They didn't kill Luke off.

Luke will remain a part of June's life. He's the father of her child, and holds a special place in her heart. His love survived her absence, and is doing its best to adapt to her new post-trauma reality. He is growing with her now. Doing everything he can to help, just like Nick. Is Luke as savvy as Nick? As graceful and open? No. But he's from a different world. I'm open to Luke's growth as long as it allows for Nick, the same way Nick allows for Luke.

Nick is ok with June loving more than one person. It doesn't diminish his love for her. His love isn't possessive. He will never own June. She is NOT "his". That's cannon. Nick, depicted by Max Minghella, is impressed by Luke's love for June, and glad for it. He looks impressed when Tuello tells him the driver who injured June is in the ICU. Glad June has another protector, who is free to act in ways he can't.

June can have both.

She can love two men. Openly.

And that is pretty fuckin cool.

#polyamory #meta #nick x june #nick blaine #osblaine #when the discomfort rises #sit with it #and know that june's love for nick will never fail #no matter what obstacles they throw at it #love never fails #not looking for discussion #just needed to say it

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queerregulusablack · 1 year

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Heylo, looking for a 3rd point of view and you are my favourite blog XD, no pressure to answer though! 1. Why do many fics (AU & Canon Compliant), under Jegulus tag, write abt suic** or heartbroken Reg when his relationship with James ends and he is left for Lily? I understand the appeal of Angst/Tragedy but it's deeply unsettling to see the many fics with this narration/tags (browsed through ao3 unfiltered foolishly). And to find a fic where Reg leaves James for his own wellbeing is rare

2. Is it Jegulus /Jily if this kind of fic is written frm Reg's POV but there are barely any Jegulus moment? These are one-shots or few chapters fics. As a Regulus fan, I may be letting my love for him cloud my judgement. But seeing how he is treated, even just browsing through the summary/tags, makes me curse in my head. And my heart hurt. From Nearly Anti Lily n James

Thank you!

Honestly I... really wish I could tell you. Don't get me wrong I love angst! I show how much I love a character predominantly by putting them through the Horrors. But I do it with the intention of having them be comforted to hell and back afterwards. Sad endings hurt my feelings; I want the satisfaction of happiness at the end, of a light at the end of the tunnel. For me, angst is only therapeutic if there's a recovery period afterwards.

And I mean sometimes the angst makes the happy parts that much sweeter.

But the habit in this fandom to have Regulus end a relationship with James/be left by him and then immediately fall to suicidal depression does, at times, grind my gears. Because I understand the appeal of 'boy who never felt love before finds it', and I understand writing it as being devastating for him to then lose it, especially in situations where James either leaves him for Lily or moves very quickly onto her instead; but like... that's not my Regulus.

My Reg is a survivor, and more than that, in a world where James leaving him for Lily is even a possibility, he spends their relationship... almost anticipating it. Bracing himself for it. He's got a whole lot of experience of not being loved right, and some very raw experience of being abandoned, so he'd be prepared for it to happen with James; maybe even paranoid. And falling apart isn't useful. But also, the idea of Regulus relying to thoroughly on James that without him he genuinely wants to kill himself really is antithetical to my Reg too, because he's an independent person, and he'd never let himself become that reliant on another human being! Not when he knows how easy it is for them to leave him.

To be clear, I say 'my Reg' because he's barely more than an anecdote in canon, so really we're all making this shit up as we go, and no one man's Regulus is better than any other (with the exception of trans!Reg who is obviously peak and cannot be beaten). Like this is a personal preference thing, people can write him how they want.

But for me, that kind of spiral doesn't vibe with my understanding of his character. For me, more than suicidal, Regulus' first instinct would be to get angry. But that's a story for another day.

From a fandom meta perspective? My dude we are all so fucked up.

Like, this fandom is a magnet for depressed queers the world over. And while on the one hand this leads to a lot of very nice content, because the world sucks enough so we may as well write a sweeter version of it, at the same time a lot of people deal with their feelings by putting it into their art; and a lot of us are real depressed! Not just sad, or melancholy; clinically fucking depressed.

And a lot of writers project that onto our favourite sadboi Reggie.

I have no argument to make about how healthy vs unhealthy it is. I think it should be tagged appropriately at all times, but past that, write whatever the fuck you want. But I do, personally, tend to steer away from the truly miserable fic out there.

I still haven't returned to Choices and don't think I will. It's beautifully written, but it does leave me feeling like all my insides have been scooped out, and I'd find that hard to read even with the promise of an alive and happy Regulus at the end; which Choices does not have, being canon compliant.

As for your second question:

I think if it's from Regulus' POV, his emotions dictate the appropriate relationship tag. If he spends the entire fic never touching James, never speaking a word to him, a Jegulus ship tag is still appropriate if throughout it is clear that he has feelings for him/is interested, and if those feelings are the focus of the fic.

The points at which it becomes tricky are like... okay, so you're asking about Jegulus, but there's a trend in the Moonseeker tag for there to be fics tagged RemusxRegulus that are about the aftermath of the prank, during which Remus screws around with Regulus to get back at Sirius. By the end of almost all of them, Remus and Sirius are reconciled; and the narrative throughout is entirely about Remus acting on his anger at Sirius, not him acting on any feelings for Regulus.

Which makes it not Moonseeker. And means putting the tag in the relationship category is just misleading for people who are looking for actual Moonseeker fic (me, I'm talking about me, this was the worst afternoon of my life). In fic like that, additional ship tags, to my mind, belong in the additional tags category, so you don't end up catfishing innocent enbies like myself who just want to see Reggie fuck his brother's other best friend.

Like listen, I know that besides the extreme popularity of some Jegulus fic the really good ones are thin af on the ground. I know it's tough to find ones that are happy, and treat our boy well. Believe me I know, I am cradling him in my arms and hissing at people to leave us alone.

But the only way to avoid that sort of thing is to refine your tagging and get really, really good at sussing out what you're in for from fic summaries and additional tags. It's a learning curve, but you'll get there.

(As for Jily I am ambivalent. It can be cute, it can be not cute, it can be a handy little tool for angst creation, I don't mind it. I do think that like, some people write Lily really well regardless of her ship, and some people don't; and I don't mean in a 'she's a bad person' way because that's not bad writing, it's a character choice and it's valid. I mean in a 'let's shoehorn this two-dimensional understanding of her into the middle of this relationship to make everyone sad' kind of way. Sometimes she's just poorly written.)

I advise you not to let yourself be tricked into being anti anything, because it's a slippery slope and you never know when something might change your mind; but honestly, if it's stressing you out? Just cultivate your experience my dude. Filter out the 'hurt/no comfort' tag. Keep closing the fics you're not enjoying. Chase your bliss instead of letting the things you don't enjoy catch hooks in you. You'll have a lot more fun, I promise.

(And don't censor words like that bb. We're not bird or clock app; you're not going to get in trouble, you're just going to make it tougher for people's blacklists to pick up on that word and hide the content for the users who need it hidden. Shake yourself from the shackles of asterisks. Say fuck.)

#owl post #old man yells at cloud #QRAB chatter #people will write what they want my dude just keep scrolling you'll find what you like #I understand feeling frustrated but like... take a breath. Reread your favourite. Carry on.#don't let it get you down.

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whatitis-inside · 6 months

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For the end-of-year book ask:

3: What were your top five books of the year? 4: Did you discover any new authors that you love this year? 20: What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations? 25: What reading goals do you have for next year? Thanks for playing!

First of all, thank you for the ask Anon! I'm very happy you decided to send it to me! 😘

3. It's still beginning of December so I hope I will have enough time to read couple of books by the end. But as far as today, my top five (in no particular order I think):

The truth about Harry Quebert Affair - Joel Dicker

The Great Godden - Meg Rosoff

Lie with Me - Phillip Besson

A devastating effect. How disinformation affects our lives - Anna Mierzyńska

Anxious People - Fredrik Backman

4. Oh I think I discovered load of new authors - I found a crime series from Karin Slaughter about Will Trent and I truly think it's very good (the main character is dyslexic). Frederik Backman, and Celest Ng - The Little Fires Everywhere is really amazing book. I also discovered a lot of authors writing m/m romances like M.A. Wardell, Ben Alderson, Alexis Hall, and Rachel Reid - of whom Heated Rivalry I truly recommend.

20. It might be a disappointment but I don't follow releases that much. I just go with the flow, look what ppl recommend, have my own tbr to go through. So I guess I don't have any anticipated release.

25. Oh wow - that's interesting, because I usually don't set any reading goals, as I know myself too well lol. However, I'd like to:

go through more books on my tbr (this year I've managed to read 12 from the list which is quite good)

I've seen Oppenheimer and found the movie and the topic fascinating, so obviously I bought the book on which it was based. However, it is massive book. Written in very small font, and as I'm used to reading on my kindle it will be a challenge to go through it.

I've also seen Peasants (beautifully made movie, highly recommend) - and I was inspired to go through that book as well. I've started, but it's really long and really convoluted, so that's another goal. To finish it!

I'd really like to do some sort of reading challenge - maybe I'll persuade my friend to do that with me. Or I'll find a good one somewhere in the internet. It would be fun to do something like that with other people and then talk about it with them. Maybe some discord chat already exists so if anyone knows about them let me know 😚

I want to include longer fanfics I read on my read list, bc they are totally worth it!

Oh Nonnie, thank you for this lovely ask! Now at least I have some challenges for next year!!!

#reading ask

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ghostheadlock · 7 months

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ghost! where do i even BEGIN?! though i’m really devastated dive has come to an end, this journey was truly worth it and i loved everything second of it!! thank you for this work of art, i don’t even know how to continue my life without it haha🤍

most of this message is about the kids lololol so here we go! i absolutely adore yoona and minayeon’s relationship!!! her journey to self acceptance is a little too familiar (seriously i almost teared up haha) but gosh i’m happy we got to see her kind off end up w jinsol <3 i feel like in the chapter before we really saw a side of her that reflected mina, but in the epilogue we got to see some of nayeon’s traits in her as well :)) sakura on the other hand, lorddd i don’t know whether to hate her or comfort her from the way she hurts haewon/yoona and acts like an asshole, but goes through sooo much with momo and all their arguments at home 💔 also i NEVER would’ve have pegged her for a cheater, even if she and rei are going through the worst, it still lowkey put me off, but i did enjoy the build up of everything when it came to her and haewon!! now haewon, my little baby, i’m so happy she chose herself over continuing whatever she had with sakura (even though it hurts because i’m so invested in their story lol) i feel like she really deserved to at least experience a life without all that pain and going to japan was a good move, i love the idea that it also gives her a sense of independence even tho she probably didn’t need it. i totally wouldn’t be against a one shot with all of four kids going on a double date haha

(also i may be dumb for asking this, but in the scene where yoona and sakura talk about what happened during summer, is it implied that sakura calling off sick was her rut, and haewon had potentially helped her through it..?)

& was kura flying off to japan meant to be an open ending for us readers? or is it kind of a cliffhanger thing and there’s a secret future installment surprise for us 🤭 i NEED to know how their story ends!! (side note: i cried when they kissed on the senior trip LOL) also it kinda parallels with sana going after jihyo after she’d left the country because she just can’t live without her, i’m not 100% sure if i remember that correctly but i do think its kind of cute that sana had done that for jihyo and now their daughter is having a similar experience with sakura.

to be honest, dive was definitely one of my comfort books and i will happily reread it for the second time lmaoo. i love the dynamic between each couple and the way their lives are portrayed throughout the book, especially mina feeling left behind (i related sm to her there) while samo go on with their lives. nayeon initially denying herself to love mina and to have mina love her back (another thing i relate to) i could seriously write a five page essay back to back about how beautifully written and excellent this book is!

thank you, ghost <3 i hope you enjoy your time off! :)

hi hi friend!! thank you so much for reading and omg this mountain of thoughts is what i live for! i won't be able to answer everything but just know i read the entire thing and cherish it, always 💗💗

you are correct! sakura had her first rut and haewon was there with her

and you're correct again! sana did chase after jihyo in the early stages of their relationship, much like sakura is with haewon now, and while i won't give anything away - let's just say i did end it on a cliffhanger for sakura/haewon so i could revisit it later ;) sakura will soon find out winning back haewon is not as easy as she thinks

haha a double date one shot would be amazing, I'm going to put that in my idea bank!

#asks #hiraizyo

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hogwartsfirebolt · 3 years

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Hello everyone! I’m back for my (omg time flies) third yearly drarry rec list, in which I share with you my 30 favorite drarry fics I read in the year, divided in three parts. What a year 2020 was. It was challenging, scary and confusing, and it was also an amazing reading year for me, I read so, so much more than I ever had before, and I’m really excited to share these masterpieces with you! The banner art is by @dragontamerdame who is one of my favorite artists and was kind enough to let me use this beautiful piece, which you can (and totally should) reblog right here. Now, with nothing else to add and in no particular order, here’s my

FAVORITE FICS I READ IN 2020 PART ONE

1. Who we are in the shadows - @quicksilvermaid - 100k - E - What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life. When he comes across Draco Malfoy in the criminal underbelly of Wizarding London and in need of protection, Harry figures bringing him in to face the Ministry's justice is his ticket back to everything he's lost. But nothing is exactly as it seems. Not even Harry himself. And as he gets drawn further and further into Malfoy's world of honour and deception he finds himself questioning everything he thought he knew—about his childhood nemesis, the Ministry job he misses so much, and most of all, about himself. What happens when you’re forced to see that you were wrong?

THIS FIC!!! It was the first one I read in 2020, and it immediately became my favorite fic of the entire year, and one of my favorites of all time. I have since read it two more times, the entire 100k of it. There are absolutely no words to describe how amazing it is, how much it floored me to read their characterizations, their jobs and the roads life took them on to end up where they end up, the connection between them in a time when they don’t even know how to relate to anyone, their sorrow and struggles which, despite being so rooted in the magical world, are painfully human, just... wow. It’s a masterpiece. It changed the way I view their characters, forever, and I suspect I will read it many, many more times in the years to come. It’s that kind of story. If for whatever reason you haven’t read it, this is your sign to take that chance and embark on this amazing journey.

2. Every Kingdom - @thistle-verse - 7k - E - Every kingdom needs a prince. Every prince needs a good and useful knight. Draco and Harry play their parts and renegotiate some borders while they’re at it.

So, so lovely. Even though I don’t read them very often, alternate universes fascinate me so much, and I am in awe of the author for being able to pack so, so much story, so neatly into 7k words. This features a princely, lonesome Draco, a charming, golden Harry, and a blossoming love that could change everything. It’s beautiful, and I recommend it deeply.

3. The Bucket List - GallaPlacidia - 32k - Draco will die in six months if he can't get Harry Potter to fall in love with him. Since that's not going to happen, he might as well spend his last days working through his Bucket List. Tap-dancing lessons? Rock climbing? Poetry-writing? Threesomes? Cocaine? Getting to know his adorable cousin, Teddy Lupin? Draco will try them all! Feat. Cheerily pessimistic Draco, devoted bitch queen Pansy Parkinson, and a Harry who can't help but notice that something seems DIFFERENT about Draco, these days.

I’m positive that many, many of us got acquainted with GallaPlacidia’s writing this year, and I, too, fell in love with it. This story aches in the most beautiful of ways, the humor happens to be somehow light in such a difficult circumstance that it ends up hurting when you laugh, it hurts when everything is right because it’s also wrong, it aches when it’s supposed to be a happy moment and feels tender and sweet when it’s not. I can’t even imagine the challenge of writing this kind of story, and they pulled it off beautifully. It’s a lovely story, one you will take with you long after you finish it, and, personally, I think it’s a great introduction to the author’s writing.

4. halcyon days - @the-starryknight - 1.3k - T - Sleepy mornings caught while the sun rises are reserved for silly word games and soft touches and feelings.

Oh my god, the amount of tenderness in such a low wordcount made me weak in the knees. I almost couldn’t take it. Being able to convey such a deep emotional connection in a short story seems like such a daunting task, and the author makes it seem almost effortless. I guarantee that this will make you bring your hands to your chest and sigh with how lovely it is. Reading it will be the best ten minutes of your day.

5. Clouds That Veil the Midnight Moon - @drarrytrash - 37k - E - According to Harry’s personal narrative regarding the incident, he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy for purely self-destructive reasons, or out of convenience, or by some unlucky accident. Looking at him, sprawled in the moonlight, Harry is devastated to recall that he’d hooked up with Draco Malfoy because he’s hot. Draco is a secret werewolf and Harry is doing his best and they've got criminals to catch, darn it.

Reading this, I found myself laughing out loud, nodding profusely with how freaking spot on the characterizations are. The dialogue is amazing, so hilarious and real and Harry’s inner monologue is so, so him. I love everything about this story. I have a soft spot for werewolf fic, and this one hit everything I love about it, the case is interesting and engaging, the incidental characters, the OCs, Ron and Hermione, everyone and everything is absolutely perfect and I had an absolute blast reading it. You HAVE to read this and see for yourself what I’m talking about.

6. Sex Ed for Aurors - curiouslyfic - 8k - M - Some things, you need to learn on the job.

Oh my god this is so freaking good. The premise is, basically, that Harry is accidentally doused with a lust potion while in the vicinity of Draco, and suddenly wants him more than anything. I loved this take on that trope, we’re in Harry’s head, and it’s absolutely hilarious and endearing to experience the near childish glee he feels whenever Draco looks his way, when he smiles, when he feels he’s made him happy, meanwhile Draco and Ron are horrified and doing whatever they can to correct it. This is so funny and such a good time, I can’t recommend it enough! While you’re at it, you should definitely read megyal’s remix of this, which is also a blast.

7. plasticine porters with looking-glass ties - @bonesliketambourines - 15K - E - Lately, Harry thinks things don’t seem the same between him and Draco. His head is in the clouds when he thinks about what their relationship is now, and where it might be headed—he’s happy with their friendship, but he wants something else. A potions accident over a lunchtime visit to Draco’s lab (what does he get up to in there, anyway?) changes things, though, and accelerates their relationship faster than either of them had ever expected. How are they going to get through this new development together?

Atmospheric, beautifully-written and delicious. Their relationship is tender, just on the edge of something more, when they’re forced to quarantine together and face the effects of a potion that makes them see and feel things differently, which makes for the most intense, visual, gorgeous sex scene I think I’ve ever read. It’s just absolutely phenomenal.

8. i wake up falling - warmfoothills - 9k - M - Draco’s always leaving, one way or another. Harry’s usually 240 thousand miles too late.

In trying to come up with a way to summarize this story, I’m feeling the overwhelming urge to cry again, just like I did when I read it. It’s just so, so, beautiful, every single word of it aches in the best way, the longing feels deeply authentic and just, the setting and the jobs and everything is so unique and gorgeous. Every single work by this author is beyond beautiful, but especially this one is incredibly close to my heart and I think everyone should read it. It’s a gem.

9. In Every Universe - @skeptiquewrites - 27k - M - They sent Professor Harry Potter to search for Unspeakable Draco Malfoy. Draco has stolen a Firebird, an experimental magical device from the Department of Mysteries that lets you enter parallel universes as yourself. As Harry traverses from universe to universe, he begins to think Draco might be the one searching for him. A story about whether knowing what's possible makes it possible.

Stories where the characters find themselves somehow hopping from one reality to another are always so, so fascinating to me, and this one is incredibly creative and well-written, so entertaining all around. The mystery of it kept me on my toes, and every single reality was a joy to read. 10/10

10. Life goes not backward - @shealwaysreads - 8k - T - Harry still isn’t used to gifts, but this one is different. A story of coming home, finding safe ground, and the wild courage of putting down roots. Leaving one life behind isn’t always a sacrifice, and sometimes the greatest good comes from embracing the people you love.

My god, there are not enough words to describe how much this story means to me, how beautiful it is, how every single time I’ve read it, I’ve cried. Bella has undoubtedly become one of my absolute favorite writers in fandom. She has such a way with words, there is not one of her stories that hasn’t touched me, that doesn’t feel like an actual, full-length novel no matter the word count. I read so many of them this year, so many of the masterpieces she’s gifted us, but this one especially is so tender, so dear, that I ended up choosing it as my favorite of hers this year. Harry’s charactertization, the unbelievable warmth of their relationship, absolutely everything about this is gorgeous. Go read it, right now, and then binge all her other works!! You won’t regret it.

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Each of these fics is incredibly close to my heart and I enjoyed them immensely. In the midst of everything changing, I really found comfort and solace in the amazing works of the people of this fandom. I hope they give you the same amount of warmth and comfort they gave me, and I’m ALWAYS here to gush about any of them ❤️ Happy New Year!

#drarry #drarry fic #drarry fanfic #drarry fic rec #2020rec #ficrec #draco malfoy #harry potter #drarry rec list

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khadij-al-kubra · 3 years

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Storytelling, Fate & Happy Endings

I’m still processing last nights episode (CR C2 Ep140), and much like every critter I’m SUPER emotional about it. But something about last night’s events and how they played out really got to me, not just as a fan but also as a storyteller. And even the day after, i was actually crying (still am crying in fact) more than i did last night watching it happen. At first i thought it was because i’m a fairly new critter and this is my first time watching a campaign come to an end. But the more i think about it and process, the more i realize that’s not just it. This effected me as someone who deeply believes in the power of storytelling and how it can not only effect but reflect the world around us. And because I have to get them out of my head, here are my thoughts on why last nights episode was so important, not just for CR fans but also as a an important narrative for right now.

...Yeah that’s a bit vague, isn’t it? Okay, let me explain. If you’re willing to take the time to read fellow Critters, I greatly appreciate it in advance. ^__^

WARNING: Major spoilers for CR Campaign 2 Episode 140 ahead. Also it’s gonna get kind of meta. And long. Because i have a lot of thoughts & feels.

So I think it’s fair to say that, as much as we would’ve been devastated by any of the M9 perma-dying in the last battle, part of us wasn’t expecting them all to make it out of there alive. Not even the players, I think, despite how much they likely didn’t want that to happen. Just look at the half-resigned way Liam talks about Caleb in the last few Talks Machina episodes. Or how, in game, Jester was fully prepare to die trying to stop the city from coming back. And for a while there, it seemed like some of them might not survive.

But then they did. Despite so many crappy rolls throughout the night they stopped Lucien, set free all the souls trapped in Aeor, saved Exandria, and brought each other back from the dead. Not only that, but they also did the impossible: They saved Mollymauk. Their lost friend who had such a deep impact on all of them even after his death. The delightfully charming asshole who was so full of joy and life and who, despite how the world treated him, was happily determined to leave every place better than he found it. Moreover, they almost didn’t succeed! But then they did, all because of teamwork, love and one last minute ditch effort ‘what-the-hell-have-i-got-to-lose’ dice role that none of them saw coming. And now they get to go home together, truly as The Mighty NINE.

Just this once, everybody lived! We got a happy ending!

And that’s HUGE in game...but also think for a second how that reflects outside of game too. Do you realize what a story like that means to people, especially given the year from Hell we’ve all had?

Think about it. This past year the world has suffered. We’ve all been impacted by the pandemic in some way shape or form, either on small levels or large. Our world has been at war with a virus that effected everyone and everything: Our sense of safety. Our health. Our economy. Our families & friends. Our freedom. (in the sense of our ability to travel & just be in close proximity to people without fear, but i digress) Deeply imbedded social and systematic diseases have been brought further to light in the past year and a half largely because of this virus. Some of us have lost people we love. Hell, the pandemic even effected the way that the latter half of Campaign 2 played out because of social distancing protocols. If you further compare this to Campaign 2, the world of Exandria was caught in the middle of a war that started because of social & systematic corruptions that had been rooted in two opposing kingdoms for years. And so many suffered and died because of it.

Then the Mighty Nein comes in. This ragtag group of delightful assholes with nothing to lose; these flawed but inherently good at heart and deeply human adventurers, broken and lost in their own ways, trying to make a home and family for themselves in a world that took advantage of them or left them alone or said they weren’t good enough...and they changed things.

They grew. They fought back. They found moments of silliness and peace and joy and fun amidst all the strife and sometimes grief. Most of all, they tried. Sometimes out of necessity, sometimes out of spite, sometimes even out of compassion, but mostly just out of love. And in the end, not only did they help people and stop a war for the sake of their loved ones, but they also saved their world from being destroyed by a rotted perversion of life from the past that threatened to consume everything they cared about. AND they STILL managed to bring everyone in their found family back to life. Does it erase the bad and sad things that happened to them? Hell no! But those things don’t negate the fact that in that moment, they made it out okay. That this was a victory and they won!

Think of what a story like that means to people right now.

I’m personally a pretty spiritual person, and much like our favorite clerics, I also believe in a higher power. But whether or not you also believe in a Divine being, the Universe or whatever, every D&D player believes in one thing: Fate. Luck. Call it what you will. But it was fate that made those dice rolls that saved everyone happen. It was fate that not only stopped Cognoza from returning, but also brought Jester and Caleb and Molly back to life, even when it seemed like it wouldn’t work. (and holy shit that gave me emotional whiplash!)

After everything they went through, both individually and together, the Mighty Nein defied the odd and demanded that Fate let them save their loved ones. They demanded that the world give them back their friend; That they deserved to have their happy ending & get to go home alive together. Just. This. Once.

As a writer, I know firsthand that there are some stories we find and create ourselves, but then there are stories that have a way of finding us. Sometimes a story or world or character from somewhere in the Aether will pop into our minds one day and say, ‘I need your voice to tell my story.’ Maybe this is just me getting carried away with the meta brain again. And like i said, i’m a spiritually inclined person, so I believe in things like Fate and a Divine Higher power writing out the stories of the Multiverse. If you’re reading this (and thank you for taking the time to do so) maybe you do too. Or maybe you don’t. Either way, if you’re a fellow critter, then you’re clearly a fan of good stories and/or playing Dungeons & Dragons. So you know how fate/dice roles have a big impact on the outcome of a story, regardless of how tightly written a setup the dungeon master makes. Given all that and how organically stories tend to play out in D&D, I genuinely believe that Matt Mercer and the whole CR Team were meant to be conduits for a story where the flawed heroes save the world AND all make it home alive.

And I think Fate knew that we needed last nights battle to end like this. After all the crap we’ve been through this past year, we needed this happy ending, deserved it even! Not just us critters, the CR team too. As much as we all like to joke that Campaign 2 was secretly scripted, we all know that’s not true. Yes, the setup storyline and world were brilliantly crafted by Matt, and the character roleplaying is beautifully acted out by the team. But the twists and turns, the direction it goes, and how the game plays out is all up to fated dice rolls just like any other game. And something, some kind of force of luck, some force of fate, some Universal Divine DM out there made the roles happen the way they did last night.

It gave us a happy ending.

I believe that this was meant to happen; now of all times with everything else going on in the world. Amidst all this darkness and rot, both in game and in the real world, in the end of it all there was light and life. A reminder that sometimes people do live. They do get second chances. They do find a new family or reunite with old ones. That sometimes the world can be saved for a time, and happy ending do still exist. Even if it’s not broadcasted on the daily news amidst tragedy reports, or even tragedies that don’t get reported (which sadly are a lot, but again i digress).

Because the thing is, like Beau said, no one else will probably know they were heroes. No one will know what the Mighty Nein sacrificed to save all of Exandria. But they don’t need to know that for it to still be true, for life to happen again, and for a found family of nine broken people who love each other to go home together safe. It doesn’t invalidate that the good things happened. That at least for today everyone was saved. That flawed people were still able to do good because they tried. That they left the world better than they found it and got their own small but satisfying happy ending. Even if only for now, because we don’t know what’s gonna happen next Thursday. We don’t know what the future will hold for the Nein or Exandria when the Campaign ends or even when (hopefully) some loose ends will be tied up in later oneshots. But neither that nor the bad and sad stuff that happened beforehand in the game and in the character’s lives invalidates the fact that tonight they won. They lived.

So why can’t that be true for us in the real world?

I said earlier that, as a writer, I believe in the power stories have to not only reflect but also shape our world. This story is an example of why, but especially this episode, and that’s why i was so euphoric about the outcome. It wasn’t just a game for me, and i’m sure for others too. It was a much needed reminder that happy endings can still happen in real life, just as much as they can in stories. Even when everything seems dark and corrupt and rotten and hopeless, we can still keep fighting. We can keep trying. We can make new families and start over and be heroes in our on little lives in small ways.

We can leave the world better than we found it.

And maybe, with hard work, imagination, luck and a little Divine intervention...we can also get the happy endings we deserve.

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theclosetiswonderland · 4 years

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“Now we walk and we never look back.”

First off I want to commend Jodie and Sandra for their amazing performances throughout every moment in this last scene and also Suzanne for writing the last interaction between them so beautifully.

There are a lot of details that might go unnoticed in the moments they share on the bridge... there’s too much to unpack, but I’m gonna focus on their facial expressions and what might’ve crossed their minds when they were together.

They have changed so much since the start of the season that analyzing how they feel and what they say or think is a totally different experience now.

We start by Villanelle joking about how romantic it is that the both of them had a part in killing Dasha. And when Eve asks “You know who the only people who would think that are?” Villanelle raises her eyebrow and looks at her with certain “annoyance”, like she’s ready to hear from Eve “You. You are the only crazy person that would think that.”

That’s what Villanelle has been listening from everyone her whole life and in her solitary journey in search of who she is. She’s been looking for someone who could for once tell her that she’s not just a terrible person, but only to be disappointed... like when the people in Bitter Pill looked at her like she was some kind of aberration, how her own mother said she didn’t belong there, how Konstantin said she wasn’t part of his family, how Helene said that she is nothing but a monster and how Dasha could only see a killing machine.

To everyone all that she could ever be was either a tool to be used or something to be scared of... someone to be pushed away. Can you imagine how much hurt and pain she’s been carrying? Trying to brush it off, pretending she doesn’t care.

But when she asks “Who?” Eve responds “Us.”

Notice how her expression immediately shifts, and she pauses, looking at the distance for a few seconds before saying something.

Eve is the only person who truly sees Villanelle as a person, as an individual and even has a concept of Villanelle and her being “us”. She’s the only one who accepts, understands and embraces who Villanelle is, not despite who she is but by who she really is.

No one could see past Villanelle’s cruel actions. Not Konstantin, not her tutor, not her ex lovers, not even her mother... And for them that is the only thing that defines her: her monstrosity. But it’s not like that, not for Eve.

And again, Eve uses “us”, when she responds to Villanelle saying that she doesn’t want to kill anymore.

She’s not simply comparing the two of them, she’s addressing Villanelle as a person, as a part of her life and as a part of her. Even when they were separate, the different paths they took, the decisions they’ve made... it’s always been the two of them. No matter the distance.

Their individual journeys didn’t bring them together for no reason, rather it was all about them meeting again and realizing how much they’ve changed, because they’re the only ones who can see that.

When Eve tells Villanelle she was like them, implying that she was “normal”, Villanelle doesn’t understand at first what she means and she even jokes about it “What? Badly dressed?”...

She’s right. Eve was never like them. And Villanelle knew that from the beginning. She saw that in Eve and it’s one of the reasons she loves her. Eve tries to deny it immediately “I had a life, a husband, blah blah blah.” But there is no space or time for pretending anymore. And she knows it. That Eve never existed, she was a facade, a long gone one.

Villanelle brings her back to reality, “You still want that stuff?”. With different words she is asking Eve what she really wants. And Eve? She tells her that all she can think of when she pictures her future (and when she thinks about what she wants) is Villanelle. “I see your face over and over again.”

“Us.”

And it’s one of their most beautiful moments together, in my opinion. They are so carefree around each other in that moment that Villanelle jokes about the ideia of them together, and she makes Eve laugh (for the first time).

The utter desire they have to be together right now... It’s immeasurable.

Then Villanelle goes back to “what about all the things I’ve done to you?”

They talk a lot about their past and their future together. As if trying to find a justification or a reason for them not to be together. After all the pain they’ve caused each other, they search in the moments they spend together an answer to if they’re broken... to if this could ever work between them.

When Eve says she wanted it to, she acknowledges that V encouraged what was already there. She’s finally admitting she is the one that let Villanelle in. And this show so much growth from Eve’s part. Villanelle is not the only cause of her problems and also she’s not the reason Eve has a dark side, it was there all along. Villanelle took her through a journey of discovery and understanding of that part of her.

Now look at Villanelle when Eve asks her to help her, to make it all stop. Villanelle’s face... She’s devastated right now because she still believes that she is the source of all Eve’s hurt and she’s hurting too.

She wants Eve to be happy but that means giving her freedom. Freedom to choose to release herself from the past they shared. To avoid any further pain they could cause being in each other’s future.

“No more tea dances...”

She asks Eve to stand up and looks at her one last time. Even though she didn’t say any words in that moment, even though she didn’t say “I’m sorry”... and even though she didn’t say how much she loves Eve, it’s all written on her face.

There wouldn’t be enough apologies to make up for all she did to Eve. She thinks Eve could never choose her because of her actions and because of who she is. So she does the only good thing she could do for Eve, what she thinks Eve wants... She lets her go.

V tilts her head back to feel Eve close just once more before they part ways.

“Now what?”

“Now we walk away from each other and never look back.”

The only problem is... the more they distance themselves from the other there isn’t relief, there isn’t freedom... There’s only pain with each step they take. And can you see? Can you feel the hurt on their faces? Because I can.

I think there are two different moments here at the end that are just too special:

One is that the first one to look back is Eve, but the first one to stop walking is Villanelle. I think that she never really intended to not look back. Deep down she wanted Eve to look back at her, she hoped for Eve to not give up on her. She wanted Eve to stay. She wanted her to choose her. To lover her back.

Two is that when Eve is walking away she takes more time to distance herself from V, because even though she knows she wants Villanelle, she couldn’t accept those feelings. But once she saw herself losing Villanelle, when the idea of never seeing her again hit her... It was scary... painful. So she is finally able to make peace with her struggles. She’s finally able to choose to love Villanelle, regardless of their dark past.

Eve turns back and she looks like she is about to scream Villanelle’s name, but for her surprise, Villanelle stayed. She couldn’t leave her. She chose her too. They chose each other.

“Us.”

#this is so long #but if you got to end thank you #i'm still sobbing over this scene #if you read it listening to tell me it hurts more #my thoughts #killing eve

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the28thofseptemberr · 3 years

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started reallyyy late this month so unfortunately this list is quite short again :/ however, i still had a great time reading this month and read a lot of lovely fics!! hopefully i’ll be able to read and write more during the summer :)

below the cut (because i’ve finally learned how to use it, yay!!), you’ll find a list of the fics i’ve read, re-read, and any fics i’ve published this month. i’ve included the word count, rating, and summary of each fic, but please remember to read all the tags and warnings of each fic!

happy reading!!

read

•° — stuck on you by @writewhatiwant22 33.9k | E | sticker collector louis

Louis’ life revolves around his stickers. Harry’s life revolves around his job. The universe has decided their worlds should revolve around each other.

note: this one was so so beautifully written!! the first part teared me up a bit but this fic was so heartwarming... i loved how soft and cute louis was and how harry slowly grew and learned to accept louis

•° — thinking about the t-shirt you sleep in by @absoloutenonsense 52.4k | E | abo

Harry's alpha fraternity donates to a local thrift shop (because of Liam's latent crush on a cute beta in his lecture). Louis' financial situation (and confusing omega instincts) lead him to make some interesting fashion purchases. Lots of pizza, feelings, and not-really-lying.

note: i really enjoyed the characterization and the premise of the story, and the pining was so so good!!

•° — time will tell, I suppose, or at least, these pages will. by griezmannxo 5.1k | G | childhood pen pals

Harry has a diary and he's been writing about the pen-pal he's never met in there since he's been 12 years old. One day he reads his diary out to a room full of strangers and finds that the man with the blue-eyes at the back of the room is a slight distraction.

(Or Harry goes to a public diary reading thing at his local coffee shop and gets more than he bargained for)

note: this was so funny and sweet and really really touching, made me cry a little. i really loved the premise of this!!

•° — my husband (29/M) died and has been possessed by a demon and now he’s cooking eggs in my kitchen as if nothing happened, what do I do? by @liamloveslarry 4.3k | M | possessed harry

note: this was so fascinating and funny and creepy at the same time... i loved it!! definitely not the usual type of fic i’d read but i was really impressed by this one as well as the premise of the story.

•° — after jay by pinkpoppunk 2.7k | NR | modern au (includes the pandemic)

Harry wants to go to the pub with his husband and his friends, but Louis doesn't seem too keen on the idea of leaving home just yet.

Or: the one where there's a pandemic and Louis is a writer.

note: this was pretty short, but really lovely; the emotions hit hard and this got me quite emotional

•° — just perfect, baby by larryinpanties 3.6k | M | teacher au

"Hi.”

"Um, hi.”

"Hello?"

"Um, books.”

"Yes, we are in a library.”

Harry can’t help it that he completely embarrasses himself the first time he spoke to Louis. Louis finds it endearing.

note: another shorter fic but this one was really sweet and adorable!!

•° — your sins, my vices by jennifer_kaid 12.5k | E | abo

Harry's eyes landed on him; a little omega, pure and innocent, looking like his wildest fantasy. Yet there was an edge to the young man. An instinct telling him that the omega was different, not someone who would walk a step behind him and follow him blindly.

"Stop staring at me like a creep," the omega snapped.

•••

Louis hates soulmates. Harry has waited his whole life for one.

note: i always love a good dark harry fic!!

•° — stranger on the shore by thecellardoor 2.9k | T | fallen angel harry

His smile had a wicked edge. He sat up Indian-style and shuffled closer, as if he was sharing a private joke and Louis understood the punchline. “I’m a fallen angel.”

Lonely and far away from home, Louis meets a stranger who may or may not be more than he seems. Aka a fic in which Harry is a fallen angel who gets too close to a human.

note: okay... wow. i’ll admit it took me a bit of time to fully process and understand this, but once i did... whoa. this was amazing, but a warning: this is a sad ending fic with mcd in it, so this might not be everyone’s cup of tea

•° — fine line by bananaheathen 5.1k | T | singer harry

In which Harry's a rising star musician, and Louis is a bartender who doesn't date the talent.

Or, the one where they try to just be friends.

Louis lets out a high, loud laugh, and Harry could probably fall in love with him in a couple of hours, but he definitely won’t. Friends is great. He can do friends.

note: this was really sweet and funny and cute and i adored the banter in this fic!! plus how smitten harry was for louis and how louis was trying to not fall in love with harry was just so adorable <3

re-read

•° — all of an eternity* by ss98 7.7k | M | styles triplets *since this fic was deleted, this link leads to a pdf on google drive

Prompt Fill: The Styles triplets rule the world and Louis is their baby.

note: i've been searching for this fic for over a year (i'm not even kidding) after the author deleted it, so i was so so SO happy to finally find it!! i love this one, and love the fact that the usual styles triplets dynamic was switched up a little so that marcel is actually the tough one.

•° — consequences by @allwaswell16 78.5k | E | amnesia au

Two years ago Harry let his powerful family come between him and the love of his life, something he deeply regrets. Louis has tried to move on from their devastating break up. Sometimes, he even thinks he has. It only takes one moment to freeze them back in time.

An amnesia au

note: this is one of my all-time favorites!! so well-written, it’s angsty and heart wrenching and so sweet at the same time, just so incredible and definitely a fic i always come back to :)

•° — enter the rose garden by @angelichl 10.3k | G | abo

Soft heats make omega Louis clingy. Enter alpha Harry.

note: i read this one a long time ago but recently saw it pop up on my dash again so i re-read it and i really really loved it!! it was so sweet and warm and tender and so SOFT.

my own fics

•° — chapter thirty eight and thirty nine of love me, please? wip, 123k | G | highschool au

harry is the popular boy at school, loved by everyone and enjoying his life. louis is the quiet, shy but unbelievably gorgeous boy who makes a certain curly boy fall deeply in love with him. the only problem is, they've never talked before. so what happens when a frog crushes on a hedgehog?

aka a larry stylinson highschool au

#28th appreciation #fic rec #my fic rec #april rec #april 2021 rec #larry fanfic #fic recs #fic list #*#2021 recs #sched

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americancowgirl19 · 3 years

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Okay, now I read all your Peaky Blinders stuff, and let me tell you this...Some of the works had something I will remember for the rest of my life.

Where you belong: Again, that kiss. How did you make one of the most disgusting things on earth (cigarette and smoke) feel so mesmerizing yet so sober? Mesmerizing in a way where I can imagine it like it's a dream, for Tommy mainly. Sober in a way where it made Tommy believe along with a kiss that the reader is real and alive. 😳😮

Tommy's little girl: I cried, oh god how I cried at the end of reading this. I don't know why, but every work with Thomas/ daughter feels so tragic to me and this one really takes a cake. From that part where Tommy greets the reader at the car, I started feeling sad and after a few sentences, I cried like a baby. And this... “That’s alright,” He promises, slowly walking you toward your future husband. “There’s going to be a moment where you’re scared but there will never be a moment where you’re alone,” He tells you. You tighten your arm around his. “These last few months will never happen again,” He vows. “I’ll be there anytime and every time you need me." F*CK MY HEART.💀🥺😭

Comfort in the stars: I read this like a month and a half ago and oh boy how hard I tried not to cry. Now I'm sitting here, in my room, with puffy red eyes and well, I can't stop. I was saving this work in my drafts to properly think about what I would say about this work but I never found the right words. Can I even describe how much this work kicked me into guts? How perfectly it's put together? How real it feels and how easy it is to imagine in your head, instantly feel devastated and sad so much it hurts your head? What impact it had on me? How it's yet again one of the works I will think about for a really long time? F*CK no. That train part? Or that Ruby and the reader talk part? The most beautifully yet uncontrollably written scenes I ever read. Do you know how I said that Thomas/daughter's relationship feels tragic to me? I meant it loving way, but this, this is something else. This is tragic and it's not good, I don't feel love, I don't feel peace, I feel anxious, melancholy, sad. You can't even imagine what mess you made inside my head with this work. Just AAAAAAAA- 😭😭😭

Moments: After reading Comfort in the stars my brain went out of the window. But I like this one too. From that part when they kept watchinging to "If by some miracle we make it back home, I’ll marry you." 😘👌 *chef kiss*

My Tommy: I already wrote something about this one, but still. My favorite from these all. 😍😍😍

I'm sorry If I being too much. I just felt like you need to know how much does it mean to me you wrote works with male reader x Thomas Shelby. I always see only works with female reader and it breaks my heart. Also sorry If something in this emotional spilled mess doesn't make sense, still recovering from reading Comfort in the stars. Once again thank you so much for these one-shots you wrote and shared with us. You are an incredibly talented writer and artist. And why artist? Because with your words you literally painted my mind with colors and created a breathtaking pictures, scenes, story even. I love you so much! ❤❤💕💕💖💝💘💗💓💞

Have a great day/night~! 😚😁😍

Also sorry for my bad English, It's my second language...

Oh my God… you’ve left me speechless… I’m so honored that you took the time to write this out. You can’t even imagine how happy reading this has made me feel. I put so much of myself into my writings and when people like you take the time to tell me how you feel about them… I’m just over the moon right now! You’re telling me about how you’ll remember how my works make you feel and how you’ll remember them we’ll just know that I will be thinking about this post for a LONG LONG LONG! Time! You made me smile so widely and even tear up! Im so thankful that you even gave my works a chance let alone send me this! I simply cannot express how thankful and happy I am right now! I hope you have a splendid day/night! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

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rainbow-filmnerd · 3 years

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My Ranking of the Sohmas from Fruits Basket

Back in late May 2020, I began to watch the 2019 reboot of Fruits Basket (I first discovered it from my good friend @sweet-chinchilla), and it's become one of my favorite anime series EVER. At the end of September 2021, I was finally able to finish the series, and I loved EVERY MOMENT of it! I felt like to do a ranking of each of the Sohmas from least favorite to top favorite (I'll try to keep it brief because there are 14 CHARACTERS to discuss!)

Also, if you haven't read the original manga and/or seen the 2019 anime, there will be MAJOR SPOILERS ahead!

13. Kagura Sohma (my least favorite)

The first female cursed Sohma I was introduced to. As much as I liked Tia Ballard as her in the dub, I just did not care for Kagura. Sure, she eventually moved on from it, but it kinda annoyed me how she kept pursuing Kyo despite him being not all that interested in being her boyfriend. Also, I know she had good intentions to talk some sense into Tohru, but knowing how violent she gets, was it really necessary to SLAP HER?!

12. Hiro Sohma

There was a point where I hated him more than Kagura. I did not like how he was such a brat and jerk when we were first introduced to him, but slowly, I warmed up to him. His crush on Kisa is adorable, and him growing to become a responsible big brother was just too sweet.

11. Shigure AND Akito Sohma (they're pretty much tied in this position)

Shigure is someone I'd like to call a "Sly Dog". He's a bit of a scumbag, but he's well aware of it. He's also one of those characters that's either "lawful evil" or "true neutral". He provides a lot of comedy in the anime including him being just a smart-ass. Also, when he's not acting like a jerk/creep, he's a pretty decent guardian figure for Tohru.

As for Akito, she's a beautifully written antagonist/character in general, and she's definitely someone I pity. Sure, much of her actions are unforgivable, but I feel like she's not expecting everyone to forgive her that easily (or at all even). Also, Colleen Clinkenbeard's performance as her is nothing short of spectacular.

10. Ritsu Sohma

To be honest, he needed way more love! I know people found him annoying, but part of me relates with constantly saying "I'm sorry!" over the smallest of things. He's a gorgeous character that I feel like deserves better. He'd be higher if that were the case, and if not for some of these other characters.

9. Kureno Sohma

I didn't expect to like him that much, but I do! Part of it is that charm that comes with most characters Ian Sinclair voice in the dub (his performance in the s2 finale was especially amazing). He's just a sweet and kind man, and I can see why Uotani fell for him and also reminded her of Tohru. Only complaint I have is that I wished there was a flashback scene of him transforming before his curse broke. I would've loved to see his Zodiac form at least once.

8. Isuzu "Rin" Sohma

Another character I didn't expect to love. Rin is a very tragic character, and what she had to go through was devastating, but seeing her being able to heal was just as emotional. Brina Palencia was amazing as her and is easily my favorite role of hers.

7. Kyo Sohma

Yeah, he's a little lower, but I don't love him as much as the ones that follow. However, he's still a GREAT character, and deserves so much after meeting Tohru. Kyo would sometimes remind me of Bakugo, but he's also a true cat. Feisty, acts like they dislike people but has a real soft spot (especially towards one person). Also, this was my favorite role by Jerry Jewell.

6. Ayame Sohma

The Sassy Snake himself. Oh, how much I LOVE Ayame! Like Shigure, he provides a good portion of the humor to the anime. Chris Sabat's performance as him is mind-blowing but also amazing (since most of his well-known roles are tough guys). Ayame is just so extra, and I love it. Also, his love towards Mine is sweet and I kinda wished we got more moments between them.

5. Momiji Sohma

The boy who was possessed by my Zodiac animal, the Rabbit! I strongly prefer how he looked before his growth spurt, but Momiji is just a precious bunny boy. It is heartbreaking to see that he's suffered and feels sad, but he's just so pure and precious. I hope the one he fell in love with makes him feel so happy.

4. Hatsuharu Sohma

This is who I like to call the "Bi Himbo Ox". Haru was instantly one of my favorites because he just cracks me up, he's super handsome (the studio behind the 2019 reboot really just made everyone look pretty), and also Justin Cook's performance as him. As much as I adore Kirishima, Justin showed off and executed the range of Haru's dumb, sweet, loyal, seductive, and harsh personality. Also, his love for Rin is adorable and him and Yuki is definitely one of my favorite crack ships.

3. Kisa Sohma

The precious tiger cub. I adore this sweet little girl so much, and how she looks up to Tohru like an older sister is so adorable! She's a precious angel that deserves SO MUCH LOVE. And I ALWAYS smile whenever I see her on-screen. And speaking of that last part...

2. Hatori Sohma

I don't know what it is, but upon first introduction, I've been drawn to him and he quickly became a favorite. There's just something so comforting about Hatori, from his kind and no-nonsense personality, prettiness (as mentioned, the 2019 anime animators make everyone look pretty), and his voice (all thanks to Kent Williams' performance). Hatori also has some of his moments of being a little silly, but it's due to the chaos he deals with whenever he's around Shigure and/or Ayame. Out of the Three Musketeers, he's my favorite.

1. Yuki Sohma

He was an INSTANT favorite of not only the Sohmas, but of the entire series, and seeing him grow makes me so happy! I also love how kind and gentle he is, and lemme tell you. This was the first anime I've seen after My Hero Academia, so hearing Eric Vale as Yuki was WILD (same can be said about Jerry as Kyo), because I was used to his creepy and chilling performance as Tomura Shigaraki. But hearing him as Yuki was amazing and it made me appreciate him as a voice actor. SO FREAKING TALENTED. If you wanna know how much I love Yuki, I have his Funko Pop! figure, which captures his beautiful likeness well.

#kimmy's rambles #fruits basket #fruits basket 2019 #sohma family #fruits basket sohmas

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sonia7atm · 3 years

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BRIDGERTON BOOK SERIES REVIEW.

So here it is, before I start I just wanted to say that I’m in no way shape or form an expert in english or literature for that matter. English is my third language and I’m studying science. Having said that, I have read all eight books in less than two weeks and I have a lot of opinions that I wanted to share so here they are. Obviously: SPOILERS AHEAD

The series in its entirety

The bridgerton series is probably the best written series that I have ever read. I loved the fact that it is made up of 8 books, but also the way the books are structured. In each of the books we focus on one of the siblings and their significant others, and even when the side characters are there, they are not really a main focus of the story. This means you can pick up a random Bridgerton book without having read the other ones and you would not feel like you are missing something. I really liked this because it meant that with each book you were getting to know a different sibling, thus you are never really bored and there wasn’t unnecessary drama happening with the already established couples, which is refreshing at the least.

However, it does have setbacks. In some of the books, you find that this side characters really change from the way they appear in the background or the other novels, and it can be difficult to digest at first. Another flaw that I found is with the brothers' books. When I was reading some of the books dedicated to the men of the family sometimes I found that we don’t spend enough time with them and when you finish the books you don’t have an understanding of who they are. Maybe I’m not making sense but I’ll elaborate in each book a little bit more.

But in the end, even these little flaws, I had a great time reading the books and finding out what was happening with the family.

My favourite book - AOFAG

I know some people have trouble ranking the Bridgerton books, especially, the favourite one, but I’m not one of them. I am obsessed with “An offer from a gentleman”, I love the story, I love Sophie, I love Benedith and I love Violet Bridgerton with all of my heart. This book is great from the start, even though b, the third book you know a happy ending is what the book is leading to, it still excites you and makes you wonder. AMAZING DARE I SAY.

Sophie is one of my favourite characters in all of the books. She has a strong morals system and you get really inspired by her. All of the things she goes through are horrible, but she still remains such a calm and kind individual that I cannot help but stan. HARD. She has very strong ideas and morals and she sticks with them even when they mean losing Benedict. I found this message really important and powerful because we usually see the opposite: people changing their views for their significant other, and I don’t think it's right. So, hereby I declare Sophie QUEEN of the Bridgerton clan.

Moving on to Benedict, I heard a little bit of criticism with his actions in this book and I see where they are coming from, but I don’t share them. I think Benedict is one of the brothers that suffers from a really deep female counterpart and as such his thoughts are not fully explored. In my opinion Benedict is tormented by the fact that he is the second Bridgerton and nothing more (similar to Colin and kinda Gregory really), and also by the fact that he lost the woman at the ball. On top of that, Sophie comes along and he starts falling for her and he feels guilty that he is falling for someone else, so he doesn’t fully commit to Sophie but also doesn’t really leave her. It’s a messed up situation and he doesn’t make the best decisions but I understand his actions and I support him. The only thing that really annoyed me about Benedict is that he doesn’t recognize Sophie at all. I wanted to hit him, hard, in the head, with a fucking piano.

Now the best of the best: Violet Bridgerton. She was the surprise character of this book in that prison scene. In the previous book you still see her and like her but she saves the day in this one, and I felt like I really knew her after that. She is not the typical ton mother, she really values their children’s happiness and takes everyone under her wing. She knows who she is and the importance her family has and she uses her powers for good. I gained so much respect for her. A surprise character and a great one.

To sum it up, Benedict and Sophie are perfect to each other, like this mellow entity. Two kind souls, always happy, always calm. Of course they live in the countryside, they could not live anywhere else.

Top tier books - WHWW, RMB, TVWL

WHEN HE WAS WICKED

This book wrecked me, I have to admit I was a mess, I could not deal. A tragic story with so much longing and guilt and despair, I love a drama, man this is great. I went in knowing the basics of it but I was not prepared.

The poor Francesca has the most devastating story in my opinion: she suffers from infertility, her husband dies, she doesn’t feel like she fits in her family, and when she falls in love Michael is sick, WHY?!. Throughout the book you get to see how strong she is, how strong-willed she is. We are not talking about this enough. She loves with all her heart and she suffers with all of it too. She and Michel have a really strong chemistry and it translates really well. I think she was really clever to wait and think before committing to Michael, and I see how she would need to see him in danger to really let herself fall completely. In the end, she knows what losing someone you love feels like and she doesn’t want to feel that again. I understand. Also, an important part of Francesca's journey is to realize that loving someone else doesn’t diminish her feelings for John, and I love how Michael acknowledges it.

Michael is a really interesting character who falls in love at first sight with the wrong woman. He is fully aware of this fact and it is really good to see that he doesn’t doubt his love for her, but is instead aware of the impossibility of doing something about it. Even when he can do something about it, his respect for his cousin is always present. The guilt he feels for loving Francesca both when John was alive and after he died is so different but so well written. It’s eating him up and It is painful to read to be honest. However, I found that said guilt disappeared rather quickly after his conversation with Colin. I may be the only one but I was a little bit put off by it, and that’s why this is not my favourite book in the series.

THE VISCOUNT WHO LOVED ME

The bees, I could talk about the bees for days after reading this one. This one has a lot of Bridgerton backstory, and it explains so much of the rest of the bunch even if not directly. So I would say not to skip it (but why would you skip any of them?).

Kate Sheffield is one of the best written characters in this series. She is complex, fierce but delicate, confident but self-conscious. I would kill for her, she deserves it. Her family dynamics are impeccable. You feel the love between these three women and the roles they have, and you get them really quickly: Edwina is the little sister, a little naive but good-hearted, Kate is the fierce older sister and Mary is the compassionate step-mother. I really enjoyed their dynamics. The introduction of Kate’s character is by presenting her goal for the season: defend her sister. When Anthony enters the pool of suitors, she obviously opposes and their back and forth shows she is very witty. But as the story goes on we get to see her insecurities and fears, in a way that it’s so in character but at the same time so different from the start. It’s amazing and I can see why she is such a fan favourite.

Anthony is a baby.We can see how Edmund’s death really scarred him, and those wounds are deep. He believes in his own demise so blindly that it is conditioning all of his decisions.He grows a lot until he is able to share them with Kate and they bond so beautifully over it. Getting to see that, was something that I loved and enjoyed so much. It makes you really connect with both of the characters and it explains so much of his behaviour, that even if he frustrates you, you can’t be mad because you understand where he comes from.

Newton is the guest star in this one and I would like to take our time to appreciate the captain of the Kanthony ship. This little dog is such a plot device, put there to cause havoc and bring Kate and Anthony together, it is so funny. He smelled Anthony and decided he wanted a new dad. Put a plan in march, probably alerted his friend, THE bee.

ROMANCING MR BRIDGERTON

The message of this book is amazing. The journey they both go through to re-know each other is beautiful. Penelope and Colin have known each other for years, and they both have a version of the other in their minds but as the story progresses they unveil hidden personality traits about each others and I love how it is acknowledge and developed into a clear message of “people are flawed and not the perfect individual you wish them to be, and that’s ok”. It is really necessary and it made me reflect on my own relationships and how I could improve them. Colin and Penelope have to be my favourite couple of the series, but, because they were because of the show and not the books, when I finished this book I was left feeling like I wanted more, and that is why it is not my favourite one.

This is the book where readers find out Penelope is Lady Whiseldown and it is a big plot line. However, this revelation is maybe halfway through the book and until then, Penelope's inner monologue doesn’t reveal anything. I would have loved to really focus on it and know from the start how she really did it but at the same time, we get to see so much of Pen’s growth anyways. She is shy and kind but when she is with someone she trusts (in this case Colin and Lady Danbury), she is full of wit and boldness. I see myself so much in these characteristics that I cannot help but make her my favourite character in the series (totally biased but it is what it is). She starts with a sense of discontent about her, she knows her fate and accepts it but, she doesn’t necessarily like it. She is trying to change the way people see her and Lady Danbury helps a lot with it. She and Colin spend a lot of the book kind of on opposite sides in part because of their own demons, she wants to prove herself and at the same time is faced with the realization that the Colin she made up in her mind is not the real one. It really makes you wonder if it’s a happy ending at the end of it, because they both have such strong points but they are so diverse. At the end, after they talk about it, their relationship is full of devotion and you feel how they are making each other focused and better. I would die for them.

Colin is such a tumultuous character and it is a stark contrast on how we get to see him in the previous and following books. He is used to putting the charm on and fooling everybody but, of course, in this book we explore his inner workings and now we know the truth. He is just a lost puppy, looking for something to do with his life, and he is so focused on this search and runnin away for his family that he doesn’t see that there is already something that he is good about: writing. His relationship with Pen is obviously key in all of this searching because it pushes his limits and makes him think. His realization, of both his vocation and his love are slow and steady. He sometimes jumps to conclusions and rushes things *ahem*the proposal*cough* but not love, and once he commits he does it fully. The “stay, stay, stay” scene is a monumental hallmark in the book. We see Colin really deciding and choosing Penelope and Lady Whistle down with all that it entails. And later on, he opens out about his jealousy over her work, but he does it when he is ready, and Pen allows him to come to her when he needs without judgement. They are so perfect it hurts.

The lack of Eloise is an insult to my soul but we get Lady Danbury as the guest star. She is on Penelope's corner helping her navigate the ton and her relationship with Colin, as a mother figure would. I believe she at least has a big suspicion that she is LW, but I might be wrong.

All-nighter books - OTWTTW, IIHK. ON THE WAY TO THE WEDDING

Gregory’s book is full of twists and turns that you just cannot put it down. Not the fact that the main female character is Lucy and not Hermoine, like Gregory thinks half of the book, just because you don’t. It is pretty clear that Lucy is our heroine so the fact that Gregory falls for her is not a twist itself because we (and Kate) already know. But in my opinion, the fact that it starts with Gregory interrupting the wedding and then it goes back and explains the backstory to you, so it is constantly leading up to it.

Lucy is not the most interesting of the female leads but it is part of her charm. She is a normal girl, her life is already arranged, so she doesn’t feel the pressure the rest of them do, she is just enjoying herself. She doesn’t believe in love, and it is so funny how in denial she is about it, until it all explodes.

Gregory’s life was influenced by her brothers before him and his big family but he feels so alone because of the age difference. He is trying to find his place in life and, because he saw all of his siblings fall in love he wants the same thing so badly, that he confuses desire with love. He is so precious, and must be protected at all costs.

The last few chapters are action packed, there’s an urgency in everyone's actions: Lucy, trying to save her family and Gregory, trying to save Lucy. I couldn’t figure out what was going to happen and that hooked me. The fact that the wedding actually takes place is the most shocking plot of all of the books.

To conclude, Gregory owns my heart and I trust him with it.

IT’S IN HIS KISS

This story is another “all-nighter”, because it revolves around a mystery and the search for Gareth’s grandmother lost jewels. This quest brings Hyacinth and Gareth together, with a lot of Lady Danbury’s help. It’s really interesting to read about the felonies they commit, all of them instigated by Hyacinth, who, in my opinion, is chaos personified.

Hyacinth is the most forward-thinking woman of this series. She is outspoken, confident, loud and apologetic. All of these traits really set her apart, because she doesn’t play by the rules of society, she does what she pleases, and she should. She is the typical little sister, a little spoiled but with a good heart. Her conversations with Violet are really touching.

Gareth on the other side, is not in a good place with his family, and it is endearing to see how shocked he is by the Bridgerton’s closeness. He has a severe lack of self love, and sees himself as an imposter, and not worthy of Hyacinth. But when he falls, OMG, HE FALLS. His attitude towards Hyacinth’s personality is amazing because he loves her exactly as she is, and knows he will be following her orders for the rest of his life. Adorable. (He is the “That’s my wife” meme).

Lady Danbury is again the guest star and it only helps to cement her as the cool grandma that we all aspire to be. An honorable mention is Anthony getting super-duper happy that all of his sisters are married and therefore he is free (my poor guy).

However, the main issue I have with this book is that the decision of getting married is really attached to Gareth’s need to vex his father, who is a horrible person, and it makes me mad.

Not my favourite books - TSPWL, TDAI

TO SIR PHILIP WITH LOVE

In this book Eloise decides running off to meet a possible husband is a great idea. Her brain, I can’t. Obviously the Bridgerton brothers follow her and force the two to marry anyways, although they were already falling in love when they found her. Phillip, Eloise's love interest is a loner and lives outside of the ton and I think that these traits really work with her because they are polar opposites but at the same time they fit so well. The relationship Eloise has with Amanda and Oliver is so cute, because you can see that these kids just need some attention and help navigating the world without her mother and Eloise is there for them.

However, even though I loved their storyline and I wanted to rank this higher I couldn’t. The other Bridgertons are a big part of this book and when I was thinking back on it the parts that I remember fondly the most are when Anthony, Benedict, Colin and Gregory arrive to kill talk to Philip, and then when Charles is ill and we get to see Benedict and Sophie as parents. So, I like this book because of side characters and not the main ones, even though I know there is nothing wrong with them. However, I do think the book is ok and I would recommend it nevertheless.

THE DUQUE AND I

I don’t have much to say about this book. The r*pe is completely unnecessary in my opinion. Daphne and Simon have terrible communication skills, but so do Kate and Anthony, for example, but still, the repercussions are not that severe. It is so much worse in the books and it has no consequences whatsoever. Up until that point, the enemies to secret dating to falling in love is such a classic thorpe that I usually like, but I cannot separate the two of them. In fact, I would advise to skip this one.

Hapily Ever After

Thank you to the heavens for this book. It is just a little exploration of all of the sibling’s future and an extra story for Violete.

Daphne’s story revolves around her last pregnancy. A surprise one when she is quite old. I found it really sweet and it looks like she and Simon are really happy with their life so good for them. Also, Colin and Penelope visit with all of their children so I’m obligated to like it.

The TVWLM continuation is a get together in Aubrey Hall for a Pall Mall rematch. I had so much fun reading it and getting to see all of the Bridgertons interact in a “relaxed” manner.

Sophie and Benedict’s story focuses on Posy and her search for a husband. She is lovely and I do want her happiness but getting to see Sophie and Benedict interact while actually together was a treat. I feel very blessed to see them be the balls of sunshine they both are.

Then we get to see how Eloise found out Lady Whisheldow’s identity. It was fun, and we get to see Pen and Eloise being friends, which we don’t get enough of in their respectives books. Colin and Penelope leaving the wedding early, was a gem. They are a couple of horny idiots and I love to see it. After that, we focus on Eloise again and we get to see a little bit more about Amanda and Oliver.

One of the main things about Francesca in her book is the fact that she wants a baby, and it is never resolved. In this one, we get to see how Francesca and Michael become parents and it's another heartbreaking one. We get to see how worried Violet is for her and also how Michael and Francesca talk and understand each other. They are one of the best relationships on this series, I said what I said.

In IIHK the diamonds are never found, but we find them here. It is great to know they were not missing and also a relief to know that Gareth was able to rescue the family even without them. The fact that Isabella actually finds them and proceeds to say nothing is hilarious. But when Hyacinth finds them the happiness she feels is so wholesome.

Then we get to see Gregory and Lucy’s twins be born (their 8th and 9th children). It is not an easy task and for a moment I was afraid for Lucy but it all works out in the end. It was filled with great moments but the one that I like the most is when Gregory says that Katherine gave him purpose in life, because he was meant to be a dad. I cried ngl.

And lastly, we meet Edmund. He is very present throughout the book but I was not expecting to grow so attached to him with this little story. It is divided in different stages of Violet’s life and obviously we get to see her romance with Edmund. I loved the little details, his behaviour reminded me of Gregory but he eats a lot like Colin so it is great to see where they get their traits from. The later parts, after he dies, show you how much importance Violet puts on remembering him and preserving his memory. They were truly soulmates, and it is such a shame that their time together was cut short.

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olivieblake · 3 years

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KSIGJICNRJCNEHCBD HELLO HELLO WELCOME TO THE HELL THAT IS KNOWING ZUTARA IS EVERYTHING AND SHOULD HAVE BEEN WRITTEN AS SUCH !!!! wow i love that you are as angry as i was (and am every rewatch? yikes) this is amazing i knew you're my favorite but yeah wow man this really. confirms it whew high five

yeah it’s pretty wild how I knew this was what happened and was already bracing for it and yet STILL got completely misled by the narrative??? MEN I tell you MEN. I’m also going to use this ask as a method to reply to some of the other commentary if you don’t mind since this seems like a good place for communal frustration (here is my original post for anyone scrolling around lost)

@meg-hemmings: I agree with all of ur thoughts and I would TOTALLY read anything you wrote for Zutara … your writing is among my absolute favorite ever and I think you would write the Zutara dynamic so beautifully!

@one-man-propaganda-machine: I am - begging - you to write it yourself.

I... am not going to make promises, but I may have to. I want something very specific and that never bodes well for me. I doubt it would be more than a one-shot, but there are multiple scenes that could have occurred between episodes that would flesh out what was there (and of course I’d cut the final 15 seconds of the show, much like another epilogue I loathe and ignore)

@deifiliaa: omg atla discourse in 2021; olivie, i’d love to see what your character tier list looks like now that you’ve finished the series 👀

I’m going to put azula at the top. not because she’s a good person obviously but she’s FULL. OF. HITS. every time she’s on the screen the narrative gets immediately more interesting. she’s savvy and self-assured and I love it. her ending depressed me although I like that it was kind of about the loss of her two best friends? if that had been more of a focus I think I would have enjoyed it more but yeah, losing mai and ty lee could have been rightfully devastating. who among us is not totally obliterated by friend breakups. I also really loved uncle iroh; if anything that’s why I wasn’t invested in zuko’s storyline until close to the end, because watching him disappoint his uncle was very difficult (I get it, he’s a teenager, he’s growing and evolving and whatnot, but also I am closer to being his uncle than to being him so like, yeah). I also hope the peter pan revenge guy (JET that’s his name, sorry pregnancy kills my brain cells) did hook up with both katara and zuko. I love that journey for all three of them. I wanted more time with mai than we got, so there wasn’t quite enough there to love... but I was very down with ty lee interfering on her behalf. what a pivotal moment

of the core characters I think I was quickest to love sokka; the episode where he apologizes to suki and asks her to train him cemented it for me. I think it’s a big deal to show boys apologizing on-screen and owning their misconceptions. I like katara a lot—she’s what a lot of people do with fanon hermione. toph is also great, and part of me feels there is a strong basis for a ship with aang that balances their opposing energy, though I also like the idea of them being platonic besties. aang is... twelve. pretty much every time he was on the screen mr blake (a teacher) was like “man, aang is such a seventh grader,” so it was nice how convincing that was for his emotional journey, but at the same time it was hard to forget he was in seventh grade. appa and momo are STARS. I am sure I have mentioned this before but mr blake really loves animals and he was devastated by appa’s kidnapping; he hugged our dog for about ten minutes after aang found appa. after he decided I was zuko, he speculated that he is closest to aang but he’s not happy about it lol. “ugh, aang and I are such boring pacifists” was I believe his take on the subject

@libbynico, who for some reason I can’t tag: so true! katara was literally something like a mother/older sister figure to aang the entire time, but whatever

yeah, I think it really sucks that katara, as the emotionally nurturing character, felt shoved into the role of love interest. it’s everything wrong with the distribution of emotional labor in male-female relationships but sure, WHATEVER, apparently nobody thought to ask me in 2008

@touslesnoms: I liked “such selfish prayers” by andromeda3116 if you ever decide to read zutara after the series; the worst prisoner by emletish is super funny too

thanks for the recs! I will take them. I do want something very specific so I will be accepting recs until I find it lol. or until I lose composure and write it (yeah this is me WITH my composure, no wonder mr blake thinks I’m zuko, “I’m never happy” indeed)

@gaeleria: THANK YOU!!! Ugh omg that “I’m confused” kiss scene made me actively hate the ending. I knew ahead of time they were endgame, so I tried to make myself accept it early on. Like, I really didn’t like the pairing, but I wasn’t going to be emotionally invested in the romance and it was just going to be like, whatevs. AND THEN THEY WROTE THAT SCENE??! 1000% no. What was even the point of that scene? If they had written it to make Aang have some introspection and realize it’s not all about him, Katara’s feelings matter too, or even apologize, or anything… but no, there was literally no point to that scene. No character growth, it was never mentioned again. Ugh.

this is in answer to both you and beloved @zabbini: yeah this was a fuck-up for sure lol. I think it may come down to editing for time; the series is very irregularly paced, what with the majority of the action taking place in the final three episodes of a 16 episode season. or maybe it’s just because MEN CAN’T BE TRUSTED TO WRITE ROMANCE but either way yeah this was a real misstep and just truly, truly reeked of a particular (white) male attitude about how women think and what they owe. had a bad day, dudes? buy a gun, kiss your forever girl, do whatever you want and it’s fine! (I’m exaggerating but barely)

in terms of what’s so angering for me: a character like katara who previously had tons of agency was robbed of it when it came to her romantic arc, which is just really upsetting. and to be fair, I was equally upset when zuko instantly agreed to the agni kai with azula because it was like okay well katara’s extremely valuable, as you know, but now you want her to just sit on the sidelines...? (more of a story flaw than a relationship flaw, but my chest sunk a little at the idea that katara was going to sit by and watch as an accessory to zuko’s story when she’s a crucial weapon in their collective fight. what a waste, right?)

it’s also especially hard to buy into the aang thing when zuko’s method of problem-solving on katara’s behalf is there for comparison. he asks her what she needs in order to find closure and then from there, does everything necessary to get it without having to be asked twice. versus aang, who is a twelve-year-old pair of rogue lips who never wins any of his fights without the aid of phenomenal cosmic powers...? ugh I’m getting off track but in the end there’s just a complete lack of understanding what female audiences want, though again, I don’t think they were really considering that at all. which I guess is... fair, it’s not the point of the show, but then why make the ending romantic at all? to show that their brand of hero gets everything he wants, I guess

in conclusion in 2008 I’m not sure the industry was capable of doing better, which sucks but isn’t surprising. still, it does fit the components of “stuff I write fics for,” which is I enjoyed most of it but find myself enraged by slivers I compulsively need to fix—WHICH IS STILL NOT A PROMISE but ugh I can already feel myself giving in

#avatar the last airbender #zabbini

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strwberrytae · 3 years

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So Long, Farewell, and Goodbye For Now -

“I don’t know how you are so familiar to me—or why it feels less like I am getting to know you and more as though I am remembering who you are. How every smile, every whisper brings me closer to the impossible conclusion that I have known you before, I have loved you before—in another time, a different place, some other existence.” - Lang Leav

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Hello, You ♡ Yes, You. You ethereal, beautiful being. I am writing to you with bittersweet yet wonderful news - depending on the perspective. I am writing this post to inform all of you that I will no longer be writing for this blog for the foreseeable future. What I mean by that is that I am not giving up writing forever, no. But my life has changed so much over the last two years, I do not see myself writing again for quite some time. But don’t worry! I will be back!

Below the Read More section, I have poured my heart and soul into the real reasons why I’ve made this decision. I warn you, it’s lengthy but it’s everything that has led up to this over the years. So, if you fancy, have a read. If not, I bid you farewell and wish you all the happiness in the world. Thank you for supporting me so far. I truly appreciate it and love you all very dearly. Now, if you wish to read it at a later time, I will have a link available on my page at all times for anyone who is curious. It’s a hell of a story if you ask me ~

Edit: Made by Me - also, a surprise photo at the end Warnings/Triggers: Talks of emotional abuse, depression, and suicide but also happiness and love -

When I first started this blog, it was 2016. I had been on Tumblr for over a decade now but BTS led me to writing passionately for 2 years. I was incredibly active and utterly consumed by this website. Not just for the writing, but I was so obsessed because of my friends and mutuals that I made along the way. Can I just say that I’ve met some incredible people on this platform - including my best friend and soulmate? Truthfully, the absolute best friend I have ever had. But more importantly, Tumblr was my greatest escape. I mean this website truly has been my saving grace through very dark times.

In that part of my life, I was in an extremely toxic relationship; by then, it was 6 years I was with him. He was emotionally abusive, had such a short-fuse temper, hated everyone I knew which led me never really seeing any of my friends after college, knew I was anorexic and did nothing to stop me, knew I had depression since we started dating and always argued it as if it wasn’t real, crushed my dreams and ambitions, mocked potential suicide attempts, expected me to just abandon all hope to ever leave home to explore someplace new or get a job that I actually love. He was...just the worst. Never hit me though, so I’m grateful for that. But sometimes I wish he would so it would have given me the voice I needed to get out of that relationship much sooner than I did. But regardless, because of him plus having a soul-sucking job that wore me down to the core, Tumblr was my escape. BTS was my escape.

I fell hard and I fell deep. I created a fantasy world within this world. All of my dreams, fantasies, desires, and hopes were poured into my writing. My imagination was running wild. My activity was through the roof because I was always on here day in and out, just pretending like the outside world didn’t exist. It consumed me...but I needed it. Looking back, it was pretty excessive. At the time, I seemed perfectly normal because everyone else was just as active and saying the same things and doing the same things. I felt a belonging, like I fit in.

But I hated the person I became. It took me getting yelled at, mocked, ridiculed, and belittled by my ex to snap me out of that illusion I built and back into reality. That was the roughest night that we had filled with lots of screaming on his end and crying on my part. He thought my obsession was sick. He thought it was disgusting. It all started because he found fake texts I had made with Jimin and Tae. Don’t recall the story it was a part of but he thought they were texts with the actual members… In my eyes, I should get credit for making them look so legit but he didn’t see it that way. He thought fangirling over men was essentially cheating. No matter how hard I tried to explain, he didn’t understand. But a part of his view was right. I learned that I was a bit too much into it and I really needed to take a step back from Tumblr for a while. So I did. I deactivated my account and disappeared for months. Also because he made me and threatened our relationship if I didn’t. Should have taken the out but ah well.

Just two months prior to this incident, I attempted suicide. Well, contemplated. Everything was planned out. Bought a hotel room for Thanksgiving night as I was working a super late shift until about 1-2am. My commute home was an hour long and I still had to come back to work at 7am. So I got a room. Brought a large amount of pills with me and I was going to call it. No notes written to friends, family, or loved ones. Nothing. I was done. Didn’t think anyone would miss me. I just figured the world would keep turning without me. I had thought about doing this several times before but this was my first time making plans for it. It was my lowest of the low. But then I met someone that night that changed my life entirely just in a 10 minute interaction of talking - nothing special. We’ll get to that later. But this person just gave me hope and to this day, I still can’t explain it. It was euphoric. I felt clarity. It was in that night that I thought I might hold out just a little bit longer.

And thus @strwberrytae was born - but it was far from the same. At first, I restarted the blog in secret. Why would I do this? Why would a 25 year old open a blog in secret? Well, two months after the awful fight, my ex proposed to me and I said yes. I know. Believe me, I know. I was scared. My depression was getting worse again. I no longer had an escape except for books. All I did was read so I had some sort of reality to be in besides my own. But returning to a brand new blog did not give the same satisfaction as returning to an old blog.

I worked so hard on my first blog and this redo, I tried to consider it as a gift. Perhaps this was a chance to start anew and rebrand myself. This optimism kept up for quite some time. Slowly, I added my favorite past works then added some new chapters. If you’ve been here with me since 2017, you would know that my appearance on Tumblr was still not the same. Then I got married in October.

An empty, loveless marriage that I regret to this day. Needless to say, my writing and activity on Tumblr was still practically non-existent as I was still too scared of getting caught. Even though he finally gave me permission to use it again because he could tell how miserable it was making me. Yes, gave me permission. Thankfully, it all ended after a year. I finally went to a therapist even though I hated them so much and all past therapists I had. She was pretty great. Within five sessions, I summoned the courage to break up with this guy. I was finally set free. Nearly 9 years together and I finally felt like I could breathe.

Unfortunately, although I was free, I had to live with the guy for about 5 months after the breakup. Which was beyond rough, believe me. Imagine someone writhing in pain and bawling their eyes out and venting non-stop about all of their faults and wrongdoings every single day. At the end of the day, as shitty as he was to me, he was my best friend too. We went through a lot of shit together and he did have some good sides to him too. So witnessing this was horrendous. Needless to say, I wasn’t getting much privacy either. Writing was not my top priority. Now it’s 2019 and things changed drastically for the better - and worst.

Remember the person I met in 2016 on Thanksgiving night? Well, that person is someone I crushed on every since that night. For 2 years. People, I’m telling you. He did absolutely nothing special that night. He didn’t flirt with me. He didn’t check me out. He didn’t do anything remotely to make a girl swoon but I was so drawn to him. The only word that could describe it was “cosmic” - beautifully cosmic.

Well in January 2019, 2 months following my break up, he came into my store one day. And my god did he look incredible. He was dressed head to toe in black - a fitted black suit at that. He even wore this long, designer jacket to match. Hair shaved on the sides with beautiful, thick dark hair on top. So tall - 182cm. A smile that could kill; quite literally. The canines are on point. He looked like a five course meal. That day, he definitely flirted with me. By the end of the week, we had our first date. Sadly, I also lost my job in the same week and was unemployed for a year because no one would hire me. I was laid off and one of my seniors took my job. Of course, they needed to keep me around for the holidays and then give me the boot. I was devastated. I hated that job so much as it only aided in fueling my depression but losing it was definitely an amazing thing. And! I survived on my savings and definitely didn’t spend my time writing. I had life to sort out last year - like from the ground up. No worries though. I got a job in February 2020 and I love it, so it’s all good, baby. Now I’m in the health field and feel like I’m actually helping people, which I love.

Now, here we are 2 years later and I’m engaged to the man. Someone who makes me smile everyday, believes in me, encourages me, let’s me be 100% myself, travels with me, taught me how to love myself, taught me to accept my body, gets me on a level that only my best friend could, and someone who goes above and beyond every single day to show me how much he loves me. Bonus, he welcomes my love for BTS with open arms, reads my writing, AND has even been sucked in himself to the fandom. Jungkook and Jimin, look out. You got another fanboy. I thought true love was impossible for me but I was very, very wrong.

He has shown me that I can be happy and I have finally experienced true happiness. When people ask how I’m doing, I don’t cringe and lie through my teeth. I smile and say that I am doing well because by George, I am. Everyone around me has seen me over the last two years and made the comment, “you look so much happier”. They meet him and swoon just as much as I do. Is he perfect? No, he’s not. He has flaws just like everyone else but he actually grows and learns from his mistakes to better himself. That’s what amazes me the most. Even if we argue, which is seldom, he refuses to let it go without resolution so we can always fix whatever the issue is. As we like to call it, we’re in-sync. In everything, we’re always so in-sync. I’m wildly in love, my dudes.

So, why am I not writing anymore? To put it simply, I’m happy and don’t really feel the desire to write anymore - at least not fanfiction. Even when I was super young, like elementary school, I used writing as an outlet for my dark escape. I wrote poetry primarily and by middle school, it turned to fanfiction for Supernatural, Simple Plan, and Panic! At The Disco. Along with a very long list of other bands and shows but anyways. I’ve been severely depressed since I was 15 and fanfiction put me in this hole that I couldn’t get out of. I relied on this method to help me get through all the bad shit I was dealing with. It was my coping mechanism.

Now? While depression never truly goes away as the lovely disease that it is, I am genuinely happy. Because of this, when I opened all of my past works and works in progress, I felt nothing but guilt. Guilt for not keeping up with my chapters or keeping my account active. I felt dread to have to escape in this world that I had created. I felt no joy or excitement. It was the strangest feeling that happened all in a matter of seconds. Thus leading to my final decision to take a step away from writing. Do I still love it? Absolutely. But now I think I’m going to re-route and focus my writing on what I love - reality. I’m going to get back into journaling and write essays about love and beauty as I’ve always loved to do. But for escaping into a fantasy world? I don’t know when I’ll be back.

Now I know what you’re thinking. “But you can write and be happy!” Nah fam. Writing has been my aid through dark times and now I mostly associate it with those dark times. And for once in my life, I feel this desire to enjoy reality and remain in it - with the exception of journaling here and there. Even daydreaming is difficult. It’s strange. I love my reality. This sounds like gloating now but it’s truly a remarkable feeling. When you’ve been battling depression for 15 years, it feels really freaking nice to say that I’m happy.

So that’s why I’m taking a break - in a very long, drawn out way. But my hope was that after this long story, you might understand truly why I am doing this. It would have been easier to just say that writing doesn’t bring me joy anymore but I feel that I owe more than that; especially because I really don’t know if I’ll write for this blog ever again. The last time I took a break, I disappeared without being able to explain myself and I wanted to do so now that I have the chance.

Ultimately, thank you to everyone who has stuck by me over the years. It’s truly been one hell of a rollercoaster. The friends I’ve made on here have seen me at my lowest of the lows. But hey! I’ll still be around. I just won’t be publishing or continuing any of my works anywhere in the near future. Seriously though. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. This website has helped me tremendously and I’ll never forget it. Besides, there’s lots of other exciting things happening in my life now so you’ll certainly see me pop in here and there to talk about it ♡

If you wish, you can message me for questions or anything you want to know. I’m an open book - at least about most things hehe. And don’t worry. I still very much love Taehyung and still wildly obsessing over how marvelous he is. Umf.

(here’s some recent photos of me as i rarely take selfies anymore haha. and a derp photo of me and the man i love >_< why is the cutest photo of him with the worst photo of me? still cute though hehe)

#me #personal #goodbye for now #no longer writing #bts writer

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iloveseung-gi · 3 years

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My sad farewell to the Goblin/Guardian: The Lonely and Great God:

07/05/2021: The Goblin found the Grim Reaper and because of the memories of their new founded friendship he let the Grim Reaper go, although he used the excuse that the Grim Reaper couldn’t remember anything. Then the Grim Reaper was called before the auditors of the Afterlife who gave the Reaper a punishment and suspension because he gave memories back to a human. The punishment: to remember everything, including the 600 years in hell. And with the memories of all of the tragedies he had caused, the Grim Reaper was devastated.

Learning that the Goblin Bride was to die in a week and realizing that the only sword to kill the evil spirit was the one embedded in his chest, the Goblin came up with a plan. The Goblin took his bride to a rooftop and left her there while he searched for the evil spirit. After a confrontation with the Goblin, the spirit went to where the Goblin Bride was and began to attack her. She was able to call on the Goblin who came and rescued her. The evil spirit then entered into the Bride’s body and using her hands he grasps the sword, but the Grim Reaper suddenly shouted his name and he came out of her body. Still grasping the sword the Bride passed out and the Goblin grabbed her hands around the sword handle and pulled the sword out himself. He struck the evil spirit with the sword and the spirit was vanquished. The goblin fell to his knees. Waking up and realising what was happening the Goblin Bride held onto him, begging him not to leave. He told her, “I will come with the rain and with the first snow”, and after a very sad and tearful farewell the Goblin began to turn into ashes that floated away in the wind. And I cried with the bride! 😭😭😭 And everyone associated with the Goblin felt his passing and everything associated with him began to erase as if he’d never existed, especially their memories. The Bride was able to write down a few things before her memories disappeared.

07/06/2021: Just to back up for a second: the Bride could bring him to her when she blew out a fire, candle, match, even an app on her phone of a candle. And she uses it when frightened and for fun. That’s how they met. She was alone on the jetties with a cake on her 19th birthday when she wished for someone that would love her and blew out the candle… And he appeared.

Back to now: The Goblin chose not to erase his memories and then also chose to remain where he was, a netherland, between worlds. For 9 years he walked through freezing temperatures and knee-deep snow towards the woman he loved. She graduated from college and was working at a radio station. And when it rained and the first snow came, she would panic and with her heart hurting, she would lay in bed and cry and cry and cry, but not understanding why. She would read what she had written but she had no memory of it. For nine years she no longer saw ghosts. One day, while she was thinking of Kim Shin (the Goblin ‘s true name) and who he could be, she blew out a candle and he appeared. He ran to her and hugged her but she pushed back and asked, “who are you?” But he was happy, she was there in front of him and he was back home. He followed her and she continued to be wary of him and threatened to call the police. He even followed her to Canada where he had taken her several times and that’s where her memories came flooding back, she crying and screaming, “I’ve missed you!, I’ve missed you!” and he was there and he kissed her.

Being a Grim Reaper, his memories were not erased and, I think, because the Grim Reaper had kissed the General’s sister, she too had kept her memories. The sister decided to leave because she loved the Grim Reaper but couldn’t forgive him for what he had done.

Finally on the spur of the moment the Goblin and his bride were married. For a short while everything was perfect, but one day while driving her car she saw a large truck coming backwards down a hill towards a bus being filled with small children and she stopped between the truck and the children and the truck hit her and the children lived. She died and she told the devastated Goblin, “I will run there and I will run back as fast as I can” and the Goblin told her, “be it 10 years or 100 years I will be waiting for you” and she took the stairs to Heaven and I cried with the grieving and devastated Goblin.

30 years passed and finally with his punishment ending, the Grim Reaper received his last calling and it was Sunny, the General’s sister and the Grim Reaper’s only love. And together they climbed the stairs upward toward heaven. Years later the Goblin saw their reincarnations. The Grim Reaper was a detective hired as a consultant for a movie studio and Sunny was an actress for the same studio. So they found each other again.

Soon afterwards, while sitting at the grave site of the people he loved, a familiar voice called out to the Goblin and it was his bride, reincarnated…..the end!

P. S. The last 3 episodes are behind the scenes segments hosted by the a few of the main cast. The first 2 episodes were hosted by Sunny (Yoo In-Na) and the Grim Reaper (Lee Dong-Wook). The 3rd episode is hosted by Secretary Kim played by Kim Byung-Chul. There were some great behind the scenes shots, even scenes that were cut and never seen before.

This 3rd episode shows the meeting of the Goblin and his bride and the progression of their relationship. Secondly it showed the relationship of Sunny and the Grim Reaper. This series was so beautifully written and staged and I loved every second of it! Series 2 of the Goblin was mentioned, and I hope they do bring it… I will not miss it. (The scene that took my breath away was Kim Go-eun’s screaming cry of devastation as the Goblin dies and disintegrates. It was so realistic it reached my soul and I felt my heart being shredded. She is an absolute masterpiece!) The end.

#kdrama #kdramas #k drama #korean drama #korean romance #korean series #guardian the lonely and great god #goblin #goblin the lonely and great god #gong yoo #kim goeun #kim go eun #lee dong wook #lee dongwook #yoo inna #yoo in na #yoo gong #yook sungjae #yook Sung jae

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