#and it's not like I wasn't making progress and landing certain things

[doedipus]

I played a pretty long strive session pretty much for the first time since the patch, and man, I can tell that the new stuff is very strong, but I can also tell that it's gonna take a wicked long time to sort out all the spaghetti

[xxchumanixx]

I know it says requests closed, ok? But i'll leave this here until you take requests ❤️

also i looove your work sm

can you do one with tim bradford x fem!reader with a lot of angst, hurt to comfort something bad? like the reader gets hurt, kidnapped something very bad outside work.

the reader is lucy's best friend and tim's gf, maybe the reader being a rookie at the same time as lucy

and the reader gets in some trouble and it becomes progressively worse but she didn't say anything to anyone bc she's a cop and think she can handle it?

but in the end it's like really bad and tim is desperate looking for her, and his world crushes when he finds her?

something similar to 2x11 (that ep broke me into pieces and the scene with tim and lucy buried my heart right in hell) but his desperation is waay worse bc it's about the reader and he loves her

lots of love ❤️

Breaking Point

Tim Bradford x fem!reader

Warnings/Tags: a lot of angst, hurt, mentions of blood, fluff

Word count: tba

Authors note: Hello love, omg it's been soo long I'm soooo sorry! This is not proofread yet, but I hope you'll like it! Love you!

Also, don't know if anyone else has that problem, but every time I make something fat or cursive, it changes the whole text after a few seconds. This happened after an update, and it's SO annoying!

OMG

Anyways, enjoy!

Listen, I know what you might think now.

Okay, maybe I don't. But to get captured and tortured wasn't your intention when this started.

Hell, of course it wasn't.

But you couldn't have predicted this either.

Neither could you have predicted how an encounter with a certain gangster would end - with you doing whatever he says.

At least he had the decency to only let you make his wrongdoings disappear.

It all went good.

That was, until one day you said no to him. It took him ten hours of his patience to kidnap and torture you, leave you for every cop to see what a shitty job you had done for this city.

And to your fellow colleagues.

You had only graded p2, together with Lucy and John. Lucy and you were best friends; it had instantly clicked once you started your training together.

You had been the first to know about her and John, had helped her through the heartbreak and all that had followed.

She, in turn, was the first to know about you and Tim.

You had started dating when you were still a rookie - luckily not his, or else it would have made everything a lot more complicated.

So, when everything seemed to go perfect, it had to come some shit along the way. It just couldn't have stayed perfect, could it?

This shit was named Luis El Ferno.

A wealthy son of an even wealthier mafia family that had a thing for speeding and collecting tickets. Along with other things that piled up in his file.

And as luck had it, he sought you out to be the perfect candidate for blackmailing. So when the first picture of your almost naked form landed in your mail, you had the shock of your life.

The photo was paired with a letter, saying if you didn't do as he said, he'd ruin your career. And not only that.

He'd ruin you completely.

So you complied, hoping to handle this on your own. Tim was clueless, as was the rest of them all.

Things soon took turns, though, getting worse the more time passed. Then, when he wanted you to do more than just cleaning up his mess, you said no.

You told yourself it was for the better.

You were a cop after all. You could handle this, right?

Big mistake.

When he found out he couldn't threaten you with the photos anymore, at least not enough for you to give in, he let his men kidnap you.

They punched you and used you as their personal boxing bag. They didn't stop when you were pleading, and they didn't stop when you fell silent.

They only stopped when there was nothing left to beat.

And when you closed your eyes, you had never been more grateful for the comfort of nothingness.

----

"You have to be kidding me!" Lucy laughed, leaning back on the sofa. "No way! Tell me you're lying!"

You laughed with her, shaking your head. "I wish I was." you said. "It was so embarrassing! For a moment, I thought he'd let me walk back to the station!"

She laughed louder, biting her lip.

"I would have loved to see that!" she said. "I can imagine the look on Tim's face so clearly!"

You shook your head, smiling. "Yeah, you should have seen the way he tried to keep his cool." you told her. "The poor lady excused herself so many times that her puke was already dry when she finally was in the car."

Lucy doubled over with laughter, the glass in her hand shaking threateningly. "Oh my god!" she breathed out, wiping at her eyes. "Damn, I need that body cam material!"

Eyes widening, you shook your head. "God, no!"

She laughed even more at your shocked expression, wiping at her eyes once more. Oh, she would somehow get that footage, she was sure of that.

It was a night with your bestie, a tradition that had developed early in your training as a rookie. You would sit together, drink cocktails, and do whatever you wanted.

Painting your nails, watching sappy movies, or simply talking.

It was something you never would have missed out on. So, when you didn't show up that day and Lucy didn't get a message from you saying that you wouldn't make it, either, she started to get worried.

She knew you better than most people did, so she knew something must be wrong. Calling Tim, her fingers danced over the rim of her glass, nerves piling up.

"Hey, do you know where Y/N is?" she asked when he picked up, not wasting any time.

Tim frowned on the other end of the line. "I thought she would be with you?" he gave back, eyes scanning the living room.

Your things weren't there, so you must have been on your way to Lucy, right?

"Well, she isn't here, and she didn't text me." Lucy responded, causing Tim's frown to deepen. You were reliable, you wouldn't just cancel plans without telling her.

Let alone disappear.

"I haven't heard from her since this morning." Tim admitted, biting his cheek. "I mean, we had an argument, but still, she would at least text."

Lucy sighed, nodding to herself.

"I'm worried, Tim." she admitted. "If she didn't text any of us, nor show up..." She bit down on her finger, trying to get rid of the horrible thoughts swarming her mind.

Tim swallowed heavily. He already felt guilty for not checking up on you earlier, and the fact that they didn't know where you were, made it even worse.

"I'm heading to the station." he decided, getting up with the phone still pressed to his ear. Lucy nodded on the other end. "Okay, I'll meet you there."

He knew better than to argue with her. She'd do anything for the people she loved.

----

"Okay, one last chance." he whispered into your ear, causing you to shiver in disgust. His breath reeked of whiskey, his shirt of cigarettes. "I really don't want to rearrange that pretty face of yours."

You swallowed heavily but didn't budge. He wouldn't get you to let a corpse disappear.

Never.

He tutted, shaking his head disapprovingly. "And here I thought we were friends." he mused, brushing a strand of hair out of your face.

You jerked your head away from him, glaring up at him. "We're not friends, Luis." you told him angrily. He scoffed, the back of his hand connecting with your cheek with a harsh slap.

Your head whipped to the side, skin aflame.

Tears pricked in your eyes, but your anger only intensified.

"Do you really think you're in command here?" he seethed, harshly grabbing your chin to make you look at him, fingers digging into your burning flesh. "Dont forget who you're dealing with!"

You spit in his face in response.

Another big mistake.

You really should have listened to your mother never to get involved with such people.

Mothers always were right, weren't they?

Luis face became progressively darker, turning redder. He roared, and his fist made contact with your gut, knocking the wind out of you.

So much for the gut feeling.

"Maybe I should teach you a lesson." Luis grumbled, shaking his hand. "You little slut are stepping out of line, and I really don't like that!"

You swallowed, knowing what this man was capable of doing.

Or let do.

He whistled, smirking at you. Two men entered the large room that could have worked as bouncers - ex-military if you'd had to guess.

Luis turned his attention to the men, speaking extra loud so you wouldn't miss his words.

"This little whore needs to be taught a lesson." he told them. "Or two. She's dancing out of line, and I can't have that. Vladimir-" he turned to one of them and your blood ran cold.

Russians.

"You said your wrist ached, right? Maybe a little punching will help?"

Vladimir, the bigger of the too, chuckled darkly. "When did it not?"

His knuckles cracked, and your eyes closed, silently praying Tim would find you before it was too late.

----

"I want every available cop in this station." Tim spoke as Grey entered the on call room. His brows knitted at Tim's words, clearing his throat.

"Bradford, what is going on?" he wanted to know, all eyes on them. "Y/N is missing." Tim explained, thumbs hooked into his waistband, so his fingers wouldn't fumble with everything they got hold of.

Grey's brows knitted further before he nodded. "Are you sure she's missing?" he asked. Tim nodded, eyes downcast. "Yes, sir."

Grey hummed, clearing his throat again. "Okay." he said, swallowing. "Where was she last seen?"

They started to form a plan, checking your last locations. Your phone hadn't been responsive yet, not being able to be tracked.

They were checking out possible locations on a map, as Tim's phone suddenly rang with a message, then another. He fished for his phone, hoping it was you.

His hopes were heard.

Without further checking the message, he clicked on it, mind working overtime.

Then, his blood ran cold, and everything suddenly came crashing to a halt.

The message consisted of a photo and a text.

A photo of you, battered and bruised, blood staining your body and clothes. They were torn, your head hanging low.

Under the photo, the message read: "Your officer, Y/N Y/L/N, has done a very shitty job. Only fair for her to pay the price for it."

Tim could feel all eyes on him, the room suddenly eerily silent. His fingers trembled, his whole body trembled.

He could hear Grey distantly, asking him what happened. He could feel his hand on his shoulder, turning him towards him, but everything seemed to be in a blur.

Grey's gaze fell to the phone, and his heart stopped. "Oh god." he mumbled, a lump forming in his throat.

Lucy stepped forward, heart hammering nervously in her chest. Whatever it was, it wasn't good. "What happened?" she wanted to know, repeating Grey's words.

Neither of them reacted for a second, glued to the spot, eyes on the phone. Moments later, it clattered to the floor as Tim stumbled backward. Lucy took the opportunity to grab it, turning the display towards her.

She wished she hadn't.

Her breath got stuck in her throat at what she saw. She read the text a few times, mind running haywire. Her hands shook, and she had to place the phone down, or otherwise it would have fallen for a second time.

They could only hope you weren't as dead as you looked.

----

It was ugly.

First you found it strange, then funny that they were counting the amount of times they punched you.

They must have been paid for punches.

After the tenth punch, you fell silent. You had pleaded for them to stop only moments earlier, as they took turns in punching and slapping you.

Neither of them cared for your feeble attempts. It only seemed to spur them on.

Every part of your body ached by now, your numb mind telling you to be grateful that they weren't doing other things to you.

It felt like you'd been hit by a truck numerous times.

You weeped as a blow to your stomach knocked any remaining air from your lungs.

That was all you could muster now.

A small weep.

Your head felt like it was wrapped in clouds, vision blurry, and slowly fading. Your hope of getting out of this alive withering by the second.

How were they supposed to find you? How should they track you when Luis took your phone, most likely destroying it?

A punch in your face made your head spin, as everything seemed to blur together, dark spots obscuring your vision further.

And as you thought all hope was lost, you slowly sank into the comfort of unconsciousness.

----

Time seemed to tick in slow motion.

Tim couldn't keep still, he had to move, trying to match his racing heart.

The fear he felt cut deep, like a knife. It bored its way into his heart, infecting it with its poison. He had only felt such fear twice before - once when his ex-wife left him overnight, and the second time when Lucy was buried alive.

But it didn't compare to the fear he felt now. It seemed tenfold.

Grey had to calm him multiple times, or else he would have stormed out there, searching every building for you.

He would have done everything for you.

After what felt like an eternity to Tim, they were able to track the location where the photo of you was taken.

The photo that was glued to the back of his eyelids, not letting him think of anything else.

He felt guilty, an ugly feeling that crept into his very being, infiltrating all of his nerves, his bones, and very fibers.

It was the worst feeling of them all.

He blamed himself - blamed himself for accusing you of having secrets eatlier that day.

That he was right he didn't know then.

But he'd seen your change in demeanor, the way you would pull away from him.

It hurt him so much that he caused an argument.

One he was deeply regretting now.

He had to remind himself to pay attention, to wait for the signal to enter the warehouse they located you in.

How cliché.

When Grey gave the signal, Tim's heart stumbled before it doubled its speed.

Time to move.

They walked forward in formation before splitting, getting ready to bust the door open and head inside, facing whatever might lurk behind the heavy metal door.

When the door was opened, he was the first to enter the large room, eyes quickly scanning his surroundings, gun drawn, as he flinched at the sight.

Tim believed his heart had stopped.

If he hadn't been standing upright, he'd thought he'd died - even though that could have changed any second, as he stumbled towards you.

He couldn't tell if you were still breathing, your body hanging limp in the chair in the middle of the warehouse. Your face was bruised - badly, blood wherever his eyes reached.

They stung, tears threatening to push through. But he did his best to keep himself together, even though the gasp Angela let out as she saw you, didn't make it any easier for him.

Falling down on his knees in front of you, he let his gun clatter to the floor, fingers carefully brushing away the hair that was stuck to your bloody face. With trembling fingers, he tried to feel for a pulse, heart stopping when he didn't immediately find one.

He could feel the others stare at him, waiting for an answer.

"Come on!" he mumbled to himself, feeling again as goosebumps covered his skin.

There - it was weak, but it was there.

"She's alive." he managed to get out, knowing that the ambulance was already on the way. Relief flooded him, even though it was short-lived.

You seemed like you would give out any moment.

Nyla walked behind you, carefully cutting the rope that was binding you to the chair - the only thing keeping you upright, as you fell forward and into Tim's arms.

His body shook, but he did his best to suppress it.

He had to be strong for the both of you now.

He cradled you in his arms, biting his lip until it bled, all to keep the tears at bay. Praying to whatever gods may be above to let you survive this.

Losing you would have been too much. It'd have destroyed him irrevocably.

He could hear sirens, swallowing against the lump in his throat that seemed to get bigger as time slowly passed.

He could feel the stares, knew they were asking themselves what you must have done to deserve this.

Hell, he asked himself the same question.

And, most importantly, who did this to you.

Whoever it was wouldn't get far once Tim would have his hands on them.

He barely noticed when the paramedics almost had to pry you from his hands, getting you ready for transport.

He was in the back of the ambulance even before they had carried you in.

His numb fingers dug into his pockets, catching onto something. They gripped hold of it, turning the small object over in his hand, thumb brushing over the velvet.

A ring.

He had meant to give it to you, having noticed how much you had seemed to like it when you first saw it.

Now he wondered if he'd ever have the chance to give it to you.

Once you were settled, they took off, the look on Lucy's face surely going to haunt him for weeks to come.

It mirrored his own emotions perfectly.

Fear, helplessness.

Something he didn't feel often.

----

Steady, rhythmic beating was what brought you back.

An awful sound, yet it was the proof of life.

Your body felt heavy, mind dizzy. Your mouth was dry and you were sure you must have died and went straight to hell.

Blinking your eyes open, they were met by dim light, stars shining on the other side of the big window.

You swallowed, trying to get rid of the dryness. As your eyes slowly took in your surroundings, landing on Tim whose head lay on your bed, sleeping peacefully, it all came crushing back.

Tears flooded your eyes, soon the dam breaking. They ran over your face in hot streaks, your bruised skin stinging.

Hands shaking, you brought one of it up to his head, softly brushing through his hair as a sob spilled over your lips.

What you had done was nowhere excusable. They would fire you once they knew what exactly you had done.

You were sure of it.

Tim stirred, disturbed in his sleep. His eyes blinked open, and once they fell on you, he was wide awake, sitting upright.

He scooted closer with his chair, hands gripping your own. Seeing you cry broke his heart.

"It's okay." he shooed, thumbs brushing over the back of your hands before he brought one up, carefully wiping at your tear streaked face. "It's okay, you're safe now."

Your head shook almost automatically, tears and sobs intensifying. "No." you croaked out, sight blurry, and his brows furrowed. "No, it's not okay."

Your head fell back into the cushion, biting your lip as you shook it again.

"What happened?" Tim voiced the question he'd asked himself so many times. "Who did this to you?"

At first, you didn't answer, gaze fixed on the ceiling. When he was about to ask again, your mouth slowly opened.

"I fucked up." you managed to get past your split lips. "I fucked everything up."

Tim had to swallow, doing his best to stay patient. Whatever you did must have been so bad, that it resulted in this.

Clearing your throat, you took a deep breath. "Luis El Ferno." you said his name, blinking rapidly to will away another wave of tears.

The name vaguely rang a bell in Tim's head. He must have been someone they arrested before.

"After we arrested him a few months back, he-" you cut yourself off, fingers cramping around his. "He started to blackmail me with photos someone took of me... naked."

Tim's heart stuttered to a painful halt, eyes widening. Every single thought in his mind came to a stop as your words slowly sank in.

Blackmailed.

Photos of you.

Naked.

He swallowed heavily, that ugly feeling of guilt intensifying.

He should have noticed.

"He wanted me to erase things from his file." you continued, ripping him from his vile thoughts. "And when he asked of me to let a corpse disappear, I said no. Big mistake."

Despite the situation, you managed a humorless, dry laugh, but Tim wasn't in the mood for laughing.

No, he was far closer to breaking something.

Or someone.

"He let his guards 'teach me a lesson', as he said it. To show everyone what a shitty job I did. And he was right."

Tim's gaze snapped back to yours, having been glued to the blanket before. The chair made a nasty sound on the linoleum as he brought it ever closer.

Now he knew what you'd been hiding the past few months.

He would have done the same.

His head shook unbeknownst to him, and he wished he could take you into his arms, hold you close to shield you from all the horror in the world.

But you could barely move, your survival a sole miracle.

He brought your hand to his lips, unable to find the words to assure you everything would be fine.

He knew it wouldn't.

"I'm so sorry." you croaked out, biting your swollen lip as more tears fell. "I know I should have told you, but I was so scared. He said he'd end me if I told someone."

Tim swallowed again, bile rising in his throat at the thought.

Oh, how badly he wanted to have a chat with this man.

Though chat might not be the right word.

He took a deep breath to calm himself. Then his fingers dug into his pocket, taking out the small, velvety box.

He turned it over in his hand before slowly opening it, taking the ring out. It glittered in the dim light, reflecting it.

Your eyes widened at the sight, recognizing it. You had admired it through the jeweler's window, knowing you'd never buy it, because it was way too expensive.

Seeing it now, crushed your heart.

He bad bought it for you.

Tim wiped at his nose before he took your hand, slowly putting the ring onto your finger. It fit perfectly.

Then his fingers encircled yours, holding them tight as he swallowed.

"We'll do this together." he said, looking up at you. "Whatever might come, we'll do it together. I'll fight Grey on it if need be, but you won't leave the LAPD."

Fresh tears gathered in your eyes, blurring your sight. The love you felt for this man was indescribable. And you could only hope you hadn't lost him with what you'd done.

"I love you." he spoke, licking his lip. It tasted salty, and he noticed that a tear of his own had managed to spill. "I promise you I'll be there whenever you need me. We can do this, whatever may come. You and I."

You sobbed, overwhelmed by his words. "I love you, too." you managed to say, not sure how you deserved him. "But I don't know how we'll do that."

He bit his lip, and for the first time since you had been missing, he smiled. It was a small one, but it was a smile nonetheless.

"Let me handle that."

Tag List

@newobsessionweekly @laheysfilm @dhundhchrih @augustvandyne @rookietrek @nachofriess @dtftheavengers @wonderland2425

[luveax]

Favorite

~~~~~

One Shot | Pornstar!Hoodie x Fem!Reader | Smut 18+

Say my name, I want the neighbors to hear it Want your body to feel it Boy you know if there's a heaven, Im near it Yeah I promise my dear Its only you who has my body and heals it

Warning(s): You know why you're here don't PMO

~~~~~

You honestly and truly couldn’t believe it. Your heart was racing so hard you were sure it was going to pop right out of your chest. This wasn't you. You leave work and go home. You don't go out, and you certainly do accept a date from. Your. Insanely. Hot. Neighbor. Who also may or may not be a pornstar. That you watch. Every night. By yourself... But here you found yourself sitting across from him at dimly lit fancy restaurant that you were sure you were underdressed for. Brain had a way of making you feel like the only person in the room. He has this aura to him that sucked you right in. Maybe it was his playful grin or teasing glances that kept you immersed in his being all night long. From the first awkward moment you met, when you tripped trying to bring your boxes inside when you finally what about him look familiar. That damn hoodie. The pale yellow is what caught your attention. You remembered every patch, curve, thread of it from your hours of watching his videos. His playful laugh and the way his hand brushed yours when he grabbed the box from you. He jokingly thanked you for being a fan. His flirty a wink and carefree attitude had you completely down bad. He was confident, a little cocky but maybe that was him just being open about what he wanted. As the night went on, your nerves started to fade instead replaced by a certain hunger you hadn’t expected.

_

"Good girl. Look how well that pretty throat takes my dick." You could only look up and nod, making eye contact with the hand held camera he held angled down at you. Your mask covering your face so only the camera can see is your eyes and mouth that is currently wrapped around Brians- oh sorry Hoodie's cock. You had to remember to only call him by his Camera name when he was filming you. But fuck it was hard to thing when this man was around. The way he took control and dominated the scene was just unworldly.

"There you go keep taking that shit" Only when you felt light headed did he let you off to breathe. Your body shaking as you tried to inhale.

"Calm down. This is what you wanted right?" He asked condescendingly. You nodded. He gripped your hair in a fist and pushed you onto your hands and knees. He caressed your ass before landing a hard smack on it.

"Oh fuck" you cries out in pain even though you felt yourself dripping down your thigh.

"Can I have a taste pretty girl" you nod. When you look back at him you can see him prop the camera up to get a good angle. He lifts his mask up just enough to uncover his mouth and dives right in. Your head falling onto the pillow in front of you.

"B-Hoodie oh my god, fuck yes" your voice mumbles from the pillow. You can hear the sucking and slurping and he just intensifies the experience tenfold.

-

You couldn't control the sounds coming out of your body as Hoodie drilled you into the mattress. You attempted to push him away just bit so you can relive some of the pressure but he smacked your hands away.

"Fucking ungrateful, I take you out to eat, pay for your meal, bring you home, eat your pussy and now you can't even take my dick. Fucking worthless." he rants while progressively pounding into you harder and harder.

"mm sorry" you gasp out, your eyes rolling back. You felt completely used and disgusting. It felt great you couldn't help the smile that made its way on your face as his thrusting continued.

"oh what's this? I think I might've caught myself a crazy one. You like pain? Huh wanna be my little pain slut" he cockily ask.

"Wouldn't have it any other way" you barley make out.

"Good because I'm not stopping till you pass out and even then I might keep going. It's gonna be along night." And god you hoped he kept his word.

~~~~~

This was 100% lazy writing hope you like regardless. Bai! - Lu

[burningcheese-merchant]

PLEASE FEED US MORE JUST AS DOWN BAD GOLDEN CHEESE. PLEASE MORE YANDERE CHEESE

Did you send two asks in a row screaming for more Accidental Yandere Golden Cheese lol. Calm down brotato, Merchant is here. Merchant sees you (and everyone else in my inbox I swear to God Almighty I will address you all eventually). Let me see what I've got in my noodle for you

Under the cut because this is fucked and gets a little extra graphic at one particular point lol

Golden Cheese actually has tried to gather the identities of those Burning Spice has murdered. What she wasn't able to glean on her own, from her own personal knowledge of other lands and peoples (i.e. noticing certain traits she knows to be endemic to certain cultures, like a hair accessory or something), she found in books and scrolls in her kingdom's library that gave her a better idea. Whatever she couldn't find in those, she found via sending cheesebirds to travel far and wide in search of any kingdoms, cities, villages, families and friend groups with confirmed missing persons. They would report back to her and, with all the knowledge she's gathered, she's able to find a name, which she then wrote onto a label and placed under the person it belonged to. She's managed to eventually give all the heads their identities/personhood back, at least to some degree. And now, knowing who these people are/were, she can get them back to their loved ones easier. Right? ...Right? (She tries not to progress beyond being proud of herself for going that extra mile, because it just leads back to "ok so why are the heads still here, why haven't you returned them". In trying to do the right thing, she ultimately just does the WRONG thing again and reinforces her preexisting guilt and shame, because... she knows exactly why she hasn't returned them...)

Golden has started... experimenting with Spice, for lack of a better term. After she was proven correct about him paying attention when she mentions someone she doesn't like and later killing that specific person for her, she starts testing him in other ways. She makes subtle suggestions about how he ought to kill people, to see how he responds in the moment and if he actually ends up doing it later. She tries to coax him into going into detail about how the killing went, just to see if and how he does so (turns out he really does like to brag about his crimes, especially to her). She tries to hint at him giving her other things besides body parts, like certain trinkets (it... sort of works. If she asks for a watch, he... brings her a severed arm with a watch attached to it still, for example). She's observing how far he'll go and in which direction he's willing to travel in at her suggestion. (...And she revels in how much power it turns out she has over him. She really does have him at her beck and call. It's lovely.)

When her friends ask her how she's been managing her Beast (they are aware that hers is still actively targeting her, but that's it), she acts as nonchalant as possible. Burning Spice is nothing. He's just a fly buzzing around her head. She handles him just fine. When they ask her how they can help, she tells them she doesn't need it, because she doesn't want them anywhere near him she really is fine. It's fine. She's fine. When they suggest going after him themselves... thank goodness she's a good actress and a quick thinker, because her very first REAL reaction was seething fury that she had to keep under control until she was alone again - but then, when she finally is, she just has another crisis of conscience, because now she has to confront the fact that she can no longer tolerate the notion of him being harmed by anyone besides herself. She used to want him dead or imprisoned by any means necessary, but now... now, she lies about his whereabouts to everyone who asks (and she always knows where he is, she snuck a tracking device onto him), because she doesn't want anyone coming near him for any reason anymore, least of all to harm him. Because only SHE can harm him now. He still comes to fight her, not just to give her things. And she obliges him, albeit begrudgingly (never mind the sick satisfaction she feels when she hurts him or takes him down. She wonders if this feeling is what he's referring to in those letters about him reveling in their battles and how he enjoys her suffering). She... she won't let that end. She won't let anyone get in the way. In his way. In THEIR way. She can handle him by herself. Everyone else can stay home. They won't take him away from her. She cannot guarantee their safety if they try.

She once idly wondered about his past. About the people he likely once had in his life. About... if he'd ever been fond of any other women. She could hardly fathom the hatred that utterly overwhelmed her senses when the thought entered her mind. So angry was she that she broke the glass of water in her hand in said anger and injured herself. So haunted by this notion did she end up, that she tried to ask him about it the next time they met (as subtly as possible; she understands the implications of asking such a thing). He just shrugged and said he didn't recall; the only woman that mattered to him was her. She hated how relieved she felt when he told her that...

...but after that day, and for a good while, he only targeted women. He kept killing adult women and bringing their heads to her, and no one else's. She quickly surmised that he might have noticed her jealousy (or at least imagined she was jealous) and immediately set out to prove his devotion to her further than before by destroying those she feels threatened by - even if the threat does not exist, for she is all he ever wanted. He never told her directly, but she figured that's what it was. And she allowed herself to believe it. Because it made her happy.

(When the women-only killing spree eventually ended, she was struck with morbid curiosity and asked him about the men he killed. Was there anything behind the ones he chose? He revealed to her that, though his targets were mostly random, he would go out of his way to kill any man that he thought she might find attractive. He was capable of feeling threatened, just like she was. It was quite the surprise... a surprise she welcomed, a surprise she found deeply amusing. Because really, what was left for her to find attractive in anyone anymore, when no one went as far as he did to earn her favor?)

She actually does find him handsome. She always has, from the beginning. It was something she considered to be a great shame; such good looks squandered on such a horrible man. But now... with her greed slowly spiraling out of control thanks to him constantly overfeeding it the way he does with his violent extremism... she's starting to dare to find that extremism handsome, too. She's slowly but surely ceasing to find any shame in the circumstance. She's starting to think he's handsome... and that's it, that's the end of the thought. He's handsome, with all of that blood coating his face and body. He's handsome, puffing his chest out and beaming with such sick pride at the handiwork he performed for her. He's handsome, in his maddened, unwavering dedication to her. He's handsome... no asterisk, no addendum, no ifs ands or buts. He's handsome. Burning Spice is handsome. It weighs on her like a stone. And it only gets heavier each time he sees him and his handsome face again.

Sometimes... just sometimes... she'll reread those letters that are particularly... steamy. There's something rather fascinating about them, in a different way than the others. They're so... uniquely visceral. She believes him when he tells her he's starving; his hunger practically lunges at her from the page, claws at her, sinks its teeth into her, sets her body alight. Pure, unashamed, blistering hot lust and sexuality, with some of that same addiction to violence mixed in (he's a sadomasochist, go figure). People have flirted with Golden before... but not like this. No one on earth has ever dared to speak to her so brazenly, not even after several pints of liquid courage. He talks about wanting to break her bed as well as she herself. He tells her how often he touches himself to the thought of her. He details exactly where he wants to put his hands. Where he wants to put his mouth. What he intends to say straight into her ears as they go, and what he wants her to say back to him. How he doesn't want to stop until they both collapse with exhaustion. Just neverending feverish rants about he wishes to destroy her in more ways than one, and how he expects her to scream and beg either way. She won't admit it, not even to herself, the thought tried to make itself known inside of her head once and she shoved it down and tried to bury it under concrete instantly, but... she's almost... intrigued. She's flattered, of course. She relishes this aspect of his insatiable appetite for her alongside all the others. (She likes being told she's pretty. He does that and then some.) But... some small part of her is... curious. Curious about... if he really would follow through on what he says he wants to do, if he really had the chance. How it would feel. How HE would feel. What the difference would really be between him overpowering her to win a fight and him overpowering her to... to...

...there are nights where she lays awake, drilling holes into the ceiling with her bloodshot eyes, wondering where it all went wrong. There are nights where all that succeeds in putting her to sleep are the warm, bitter tears that stream down her face when the guilt and shame grow too powerful. There are nights where she just gets up and leaves, throws herself out of her own window and flies off somewhere, anywhere, it doesn't matter - it just had to be somewhere she couldn't feel dozens of empty, lifeless eyes watching her through the walls. Judging her. Condemning her. Damning her to Hell, where she and the monster who ended their lives belonged.

...and then, there are nights where she feels... strange. Where she notices how... big her bed really is, and how small she feels laying in it. She wonders how it would feel if he was there. If she could nest in his thick, strong arms instead of thin bedsheets. How much more comfortable his chest would feel, compared to her pillow. If his hair was as soft as it looked. How he'd react if she started tracing his tattoos with her fingertips. If sharing a tender moment like that would awaken something in him. If it would somehow help him realize how wrong all of this is.

...Or maybe it would just make it worse.

Maybe she doesn't care anymore.

[gwenllian-in-the-abbey]

There's this weird thing going on Reddit right now where people are claiming that legally, Rhaenyra children are not bastards. And I was wondering if you agree or disagree. I think that people are just making up their own canon lore at this point.

Hi anon,

I think what gets kind of muddled in this discussion is what "legally" means in the context. Generally speaking, children born within wedlock are considered legitimate until proven otherwise. Now in the medieval world, it's not like you were issued a birth certificate that you could whip out and say see, it says right here who the father is! There were no DNA tests, it was all a matter of word, and by and large a woman's virtue was her word, and it was what kept her and her children protected within the framework of medieval marriage. But the reason why bastardy matters in this context is also important. It's not like Rhaenyra is trying to collect child support here, nor is she a common merchant's wife whose husband has decided just to roll with it. She's the heir to the throne and the parentage of her children is a matter of inheritance and dynastic succession, so it's not a situation where a legal loophole is particularly helpful as a gotcha. There is not at this point in history a comprehensive codified law that clearly defines what these terms mean and defines the rights and obligations of parents and children legitimate and illegitimate, mostly you have combinations of precedent, tradition, oath, and a healthy dose of might makes right.

(I saw another reply to this question in which the responded basically goes, "free yourself from the shackles of this construct! Marriage isn't real it's an oppressive institution and the idea of bastardy is made up, so let it go," and while it's true that marriage, legitimacy, etc. are all social constructs and not absolute states of being, they started off as having a functional purpose within a certain social framework. And this is a basic problem a lot of people have with George's world, it's not that we have to have the views of a 12th century French peasant, or that everything has to be historically accurate, but George chose the medieval world as a setting for a reason, and it's not just an aesthetic one. Characters in even a quasi-historical setting have to act within the constraints of that setting. We have to understand that people don't know what they don't know. The medieval world doesn't have any framework for the introduction of feminist ideals. Westeros hasn't even had a Christine de Pizan yet. You couldn't walk up to a medieval peasant woman and say "marriage is a tool of patriarchal oppression and bastardy is a social construct," they'd look at you like you had two heads. And so we have to acknowledge that you can't simply start dismantling existing social structures if the framework doesn't exist to replace them with something better that offers more protections for a broader group of people, and at this point it definitely doesn't. Making an exception for one very privileged woman does not mean progress for all women, instead it often means destabilization of the flawed system that does exist, and even more violence against those less powerful in order to enforce the exceptional status).

So from a medieval point of view, marriage was pretty much a non-negotiable for a woman. And women weren't simply getting married because they were pressured into it by their families or because their fathers were opportunistic assholes, they got married because unmarried women had no legal status or standing. In most places they could not sign contracts or own land. A woman could join the church or get married (or become a prostitute, but it's not like sex workers had freedoms or protections either). Divorce wasn't a thing, and annulment was hard to get and usually available only as a tool for men to set aside their wives. So, for all intents and purposes, once you were married, that was generally it, you were stuck for life (the upside is that widows did get a lot more freedom, so marrying an older guy and waiting it out was not a bad option sometimes, all things considered). But what marriage did provide was assurance that you and your children would be protected and provided for. Marriage was a practical agreement, involving dowries, inheritances, and alliances sealed in blood. And this is one of the reasons why bastards could not inherit. Inheritance for once's children was one of the few perks of a marriage for a woman (this is, incidentally, why Alicent is so pressed about her children being effectively disinherited. There is NO reason for her, as an eligible maiden of good standing, to marry a man who will not provide for her sons, king or not). And of course, a man's bastards are obvious and are disqualified from inheriting (setting aside legitimization because it is not nearly the easy out that people think it is). You can't really pass them off as legitimate because your wife clearly knows which children she gave birth to, whereas a man might be told he is the father of a child when that child's father is in fact someone else.

In a dynastic marriage, all of this becomes even more important. Marriages were made as alliances and to strengthen the ties between kingdoms or houses. A child seals the marriage agreement by binding two bloodlines and creating kinship bonds that will last beyond the current generation. Those kinship bonds can ensure peace between kingdoms at war, trade agreements, and military aid. Passing a bastard off as trueborn breaks that agreement; it violates the very principle by which the agreement was made. And in this context, it doesn't actually matter if the father claims the children as his, because in a dynastic marriage inheritance is not just a personal matter, it's a matter of the state. The truth matters to a great many people, more than just the immediate family. A lie doesn't become the truth simply because the liar isn't caught, and there's no statute of limitations or court ruling that will ever put the matter to rest for good. Passing off a bastard as trueborn destabilizes the succession and breaks the dynastic bonds that the marriage was meant to establish. When the bastard heir in question attempts to take the throne, it won't be a smooth transition.

So what does it mean that Laenor and Corlys agree to pass Rhaenyra's children off as trueborn? It means that their bastardy cannot be proven at the moment insofar as the legal father, Rhaenyra's husband, is playing along and covering for Rhaenyra, and Viserys is backing them up by giving this his "legal" stamp of approval. But again, our view that it's no one else's business but Laenor and Rhaenyra's and that Viserys "legalized" their status is very modern. Jaehaeyrs and Alysanne were not considered married in the eyes of the Westerosi until they'd had a bedding ceremony, that is, the consummation of their marriage was witnessed. Royal marriages and the children that come from them are a public matter because the succession affects everyone in the realm. Laenor, Corlys, and Viserys can protect those children in the short term, but Laenor and Corlys and Viserys won't live forever, and they could withdraw their support for those children and renounce them as bastards at any time. Harwin could admit to fathering them, Rhaenyra and Harwin could get caught in the act, or someone else close to them might confess. Sure right now the black faction are all one big happy family, but 20 years down the line when bastard Jace takes the throne over trueborn Aegon III? There are multiple people in the family who could confess to knowledge of the bastardy, including Aegon III himself. The bastardy is too obvious and there are too many legitimate heirs of both house Targaryen and house Velaryon getting pushed aside in favor of bastard born children for it to be an issue that simply disappears because Rhaenyra and Laenor say so.

So "legal bastardy" is a pretty meaningless concept when it comes to royal succession because it's not a matter that's going to be settled by some neutral third party in a court of law. What matters in the long run is not whether or not Laenor claimed the kids, what matters is whether or not the situation is questionable enough that people with the power to challenge it might challenge it. And we see even within the actual narrative of the Dance that this is indeed the case. There is already a situation brewing with the other branches of the Velaryon family who are rightfully pretty pissed to see their ancestral seat pass to someone with no blood ties to the family (and as an aside, people will say Vaemond was self-serving, and of course he was, but that doesn't make him wrong, and maybe Baela or Rhaena should have inherited instead, but neither they nor their father were pressing their claims because they were backing up the bastard claimants, so was Vaemond supposed to do that for them?). And yes the king and Rhaenyra can cry treason and they can kill Vaemond and cut out tongues, but using force to silence people for telling the objective truth is by definition tyranny, and that's exactly the sort of situation that would get the nobility nervous. Because if Rhaenyra has to silence people already and she's not even queen yet, what will Jace have to do when he takes the throne? That's the real problem, not the "legal" status of Jace and his brothers, but the practical ramifications of hiding the truth.

[enquire]

Kicks Horseshoes

I'm on a bit of a roll I think haha. Time for everyone's 'favorite' football (buckball?) star Mitch.

Notes:

-He has a buckball here, but I'm not sure if that's his main sport per se. He's probably just as good with hoofball (which I think is the MLP equivalent of football/soccer haha) or other similar pony sports.

-His cutie mark is pretty simple. He kicks things.

-He still has that gay-ass earring of his, of course.

-I gave him markings that have a 'scorched' vibe.

Side note, I think I finally figured out where the knee belongs on these cartoon horses haha. Progress. Only Ayame and Kakeru left!

Though don't think I'll be done with this au after doing all their designs, ofc! I'd love to share some of the little moments I have in my head, and maybe some group dynamics as well if I have the spoons for it, at some point.

more ramblings below

Kicks is a renowned athlete who quickly rose to fame. He's most known not for agility or strength (though he isn't lacking in those departments either) but his bucking. To the point he adopted a nickname given to him by his fans referencing it.

Unfortunately, Kicks' talents didn't come alongside him being a good team player, or even really a teammate in general, and making things worse, his pride became pretty inflated with all the attention he was getting.

After several years of top-tier games, his personality ended up pretty atrocious, and he ended up getting thrown from team to team, taking whichever offers suited him at the time. (And ignoring the fact that a lot of the team swapping was probably related to his inability to connect and cooperate with his compatriots...)

If that wasn't bad enough, he quietly gained a reputation for being a complete ass when it came to mares. Turns out, being famous wasn't enough to land a date, and eventually, the ladies started to avoid him like the plague. Embarrassed and selfish, he even tried to woo ponies in his professional sphere, which led to several conflicts, the worst of which occurred when he attempted to win the hoof of a maid working at a hotel he was staying in.

For most ponies, that kind of situation would cause one to reflect, but Kicks continued to forge ahead. Though his attempts to ingratiate himself with the mares stopped, Kicks never slowed down for a second, until the time came when he was forced to.

That moment came in the middle of a championship for his hometown. One of the last places Kicks still felt welcome. In a twist of fate that even Kicks still doesn't understand, he doomed their chances of winning completely by himself.

Even his fellow athletes couldn't figure Kick's abysmal performance out. It wasn't a bad day, or one or two poor decisions on the field. It was a disaster one could only see happening thanks to complete incompetence, or intentionally.

So, Kicks was leveled with a serious accusation, one that threatened to throw him off the stage he had known for so long. But he had nothing to prove he hadn't attempted to throw the match, and after burning so many bridges on and off the field, nopony came to his defense.

Saying Kicks was 'retired' wouldn't quite be accurate. But maybe, away from the spotlight, and finally forced to confront his own actions over the years, even a two-bit pony like him could change a little. Well. We can only hope, anyways.

Look, I know. A big backstory for this guy? I'm not sure how either, but I had a lot of thoughts, haha. It's kind of fun thinking about him being a disgraced athlete. (you can blame a certain fic for that I suppose haha) It's also interesting to navigate what to tone down when inserting this cast into Equestria... Kinjo and Mitch's backstories were certainly unique in that way. Making things a little more PG without removing the core? I guess.

[bristof]

Dragon Age: The Veilguard Should Have Been Rated T

Spoilers for the entirety of Dragon Age: The Veilguard

I can't fathom how Dragon Age: The Veilguard exists in the way it does. Every now and then a game will come along that is so baffling in its design that I spend more time wondering how they came to certain decisions than thinking about the actual content in front of me. I'll start with the things I liked, which is unfortunately, not much. I found the combat and some of the exploration elements to be pretty fun and reminiscent of the recent God of War games, a comparison I'm sure you've heard before. Some of the overlap is pretty hard to overlook, the exploration and level design philosophy in both games are VERY similar and you can feel it with the small puzzles you do, the party members having different abilities that can interact with the world, looting, gear progression etc. While none of these ideas are new to games like this, even with God of War, it's the most recent and apt comparison I can make based on how the game feels to play. While I am a bit disappointed that you can't control party members in full like in previous installments, it makes sense for the combat framework here. Build crafting wasn't as flexible as I would have liked it to be, but I still found it to be fun a lot of the time. There's enough variety present within build crafting and itemization that I never found myself brushing it off just so I could get through the game, unlike some other aspects. I played a mage and landed on a hybrid necromancer evoker build that I was really enjoying. The other thing I liked is a double edged sword that will transition into what I didn't like about the game, which is basically everything else. The art design is a mixed bag to say the least. On one hand, the environments are stunning, there isn't a single location that isn't beautiful to look at. Some stand outs being Arlathan, Minrathous and The Crossroads. Another point for the art design is the sky box tech they used. Veilguard might have the most beautiful and detailed sky boxes I have ever seen in a video game. Unique lighting techniques are used in some areas and the sky boxes fully take advantage of that. Also it had been said to death but I cannot get over the Qunari design in this game, they look like direct descendents of Yakub.

Tone is a difficult thing to set and stay consistent with in any story, especially one that is meant to be experienced for 25+ hours. Veilguard fails to set a consistent tone on almost every level. This is a considerable step down from previous Dragon Age games in terms of everything related to writing. This game revolves around trying to kill two "gods", from act 2 to 14, that is the main goal. Except there's almost no consistency with how dangerous and powerful these gods are. What do I mean by that? One of the big shifts in tone is at the beginning of the game when you go to D'metas Crossing and find a terrible mess of alien looking biomass and corpses strewn about everywhere. Up until this point, Veilguard had been relatively light hearted with you exploring a magical, colorful forest and meeting characters that present no friction to any dialogue choice you make. Then you're thrust into this town with people mangled everywhere, you can see bodies that were trying to escape only to be caught by something and reduced to a skeletal shell, devoid of their outer layer of skin. It would have been an effective shift, except right after this we go back to happy go lucky dialogue and characters. When you go back to Arlathan and tell some of the people about it one of them goes "First the darkspawn and now this, all of this is getting very scary!". While this line was so bad I laughed out loud, it signaled to me that the writing in this game is probably not going to get better. Later on the gods wreak havoc on a city and you have to choose one to save, one of the most impactful choices in the game. However the city you choose to not save, while looking a lot worse for wear, doesn't feel all that terrible, especially when compared with D'metas Crossing from earlier. There are a few more moments I could make an example of but the bottom line I want to make is that both of the gods do not present as a threat save for a few moments towards the end of the game. Solas should have been the main antagonist of Veilguard, he is by far the most compelling and well written character and is with you the entire game. Knowing that this game used to be called "Dragon Age: Dreadwolf" it's pretty easy to assume that this used to be the case for the narrative and was later changed.

The most disappointing thing in this game would have to be the party members. There are 7 of them in total and I only really liked 4 of them. However, I didn't do many of their companion quests as I got to a point where I didn't want to do side content anymore and just wanted to be done with the game. That left all of their stories unfinished and it's baffling how little characterization these characters get within the main story. Some of the characters have major moments within the main story that relate to their quest line, but that only counts for 2 or 3 of them depending on how you look at it. I'll leave the thoughts on the side content for later, for now I want to go through each party member. I don't have much to say about Harding as I found her to be a pretty nothing character. She has some moments during the memories of the Dreadwolf quest that leave her with interesting questions about her people and their history, but other than that she felt like such a nothing character. I can say the same about Bellara but she had a bit more charm with her energetic personality that endeared me to her a bit more. Neve is cool, she has better dialogue than some and worse than others, very middle of the road. She is focused on Minrathous and really really cares about Minrathous, that's her entire character. By itself that's not a big deal, Lucanis is like that but with Treviso, I just found it to be a bit redundant since my Rook was also a Shadow Dragon that cared about Minrathous a lot. Emmrich is really awesome, I really like the spin on a necromancer being really nice and posh. He provides the most insight during the group discussions and has funny banter with the other characters. Lucanis is probably my favorite, during the main quest he falters and doubts himself and changes quite a bit. I kept it pretty short for most of the characters since I don't have much to say about them. While I liked some of them, none of them left a lasting impression on me. Davrin and Taash are interesting in what they represent rather than their actual character. Taash is pretty compelling, kinda? Their journey of self discovery is handled pretty weirdly. During my playthrough, they have one conversation with Neve right after they join the party and then decide they are non-binary. I love seeing representation in games but this felt very "hey guys look, we have a non-binary character!!!" rather than something genuine. Especially when the rest of their questline has to do with their cultural identity and that you basically tell them to choose rather than say "hey you don't have to be defined by either groups of people because you are your own person". It's a very cool idea to flesh out a non-binary character in a long rpg like this with both their gender and cultural identity, it's just handled poorly here. Another thing that upsets me a bit is Davrin. I like his character quite a bit, however, he represents the step back the Dragon Age games have taken with Veilguard in terms of mature themes. Race has always been an important theme in these games, I played an elf in Origins and that decision heavily affected me for the entire game. Yet here things are all of a sudden just more tolerant? They mention how elves are still heavily discriminated against, Bellara says it a couple times but most of it comes straight from Davrin, I played an elf for Veilguard and all it changed was that I could say something about the gods every now and then in conversation. None of the discrimination present in the other games is here in Veilguard, which is crazy because the plot of this game should have amplified that idea tenfold. The gods threatening the entire world are elven and everyone knows it. That is a ripe opportunity for upsetting and insightful storytelling and all we get is Davrin saying "Elves really have it hard" every now and then.

I skipped most of the side content in this game, and I was heavily punished for it. The game tells you a few times that you should do the side stuff and I ignored it for the most part, this led to me getting the "bad" ending where every single member of my party, myself included, died, saving the world in the process. My issue lies with the lack of decision that led me to this ending. There were no dialogue options throughout the game that I could have chosen to prevent this and get a better ending. The game basically said to my face after the credits rolled "If you did the side content you would have gotten the good ending". I do not think an rpg that prides itself on the choices you make affecting the narrative should work like this. That's not even mentioning the lack of choice you have in regards to anything in this story, you make decisions don't get me wrong, they just don't affect much. Even with the party, 9/10 times everyone in the party agrees with everything you do, I only saw the "X character disprove" pop up maybe 3 or 4 times and I was choosing the meanest options you could make sometimes. The worst part is, I found the ending I got to be the most affecting and emotional part of the game. My home city of Minrathous looked like D'metas Crossing, everything was terrible, all my party members were dying one by one, leading to my character sacrificing himself to save the entire world. It was the dark and desperate tone the game was teetering on the edge of for the entire runtime come to fruition, and directly after Veilguard gives you a text pop up that basically says "you didn't do the side content and everyone died because of it". A final slap in the face after Veilguard actually made a risky choice, I should have been the one wondering what I could have done differently after the credits rolled, wondering if I had helped the party with their personal issues if things would have turned out differently, wondering if I had helped the various faction prepare for the coming battle if we could have won with little to no casualties. Veilguard disguises itself as a narrative choice driven rpg but there is a story it wants to tell, it does its best to push you in the direction of the ending they want to show as it would be consistent with the rest of the pg-13 writing the game has to offer. I wish we could have seen what the original concept of this game would have looked like, when it was more Dreadwolf and less Veilguard.

[hag-rambling-on]

More rewinxing infodump ?/~

I haven't said it, but it's understood that Sirenix Boxes, Sirenix Wishes, or Gifts of Destiny as another things, don't exist. Otherwise, everyone would be chasing transformations because, wishes!

My witch forms names are based in the triple goddess original symbols btw, I reference lots of these things in my witches.

Graduating from Cloud Tower and Fonterrosa is a given; one because they corrupt you as a cult to do it -oks, no, also you can cheat-, the others by natural progression, if you got to the last course of course you are gonna pass the last one unless you suddenly become a literal donkey.

Graduating from Alfea is like Excelsior: Become a Guardian Fairy (the position is vacant or inherited), and/or discover a new transformation, and/or become a Nymph. With Honors: You acquire Enchantix, but you're not given the Guardian position. Graduated: You acquire a decent transformation superior to Charmix And atuned with your skills. Other aka Dishonor. Like, sucks to be an alfean fairy, I personally recomend Lymphean College (they make you a personalized plan).

Stormy has more raw power, Darcy more dexterity power, and Icy is more balanced. They would be the Girl, the Witch, and the Lady in the Triad.

Stormy is the one who best meets the criteria of her ancestor because, although Darcy is Valtor's daughter, NONE OF THE WITCHES HAD OFFSPRING (I'm not saying that I haven't hinted that a some of them were hot/obsessed for a Bloom ancestor, because they WERE). But the girls as "receptacles" have to meet biological characteristics and time of birth, not purely genetic.

No one, not even Musa, knows that her mother was Nymph. (Well, her father, Daphne, and the Company of Light MQYBE, but no one else.) It's the secret her father will take to his grave.

Magic theorists say that space is a kind of Void, and that witches should try using their Phoenix form to travel in space (Witches say they should try it first as "satisfact ones curiosity is that gave more lives to cats").

As a note, in my rewinxing Darkar is more powerful and lot of older than Valtor and the Ancestrals but the Winx have the Relix Realm Community pulling him too (and he was Still recovering from his prision and was in a "I have all the time of the universe, relax" mode) remember dude is Old.

Tecnically Acheron is older than the Ancestral Witches for a sort time in this universe years too, but Mythix team took care of him very quickly, so he was locked up for a long time.

Faragonda is the Fairy of the Mind, of the Conscious and Subconscious.

Dark Bloom! is a fairy who has lost all her positive emotions, presenting witch-like traits in her attire (her wings almost gone, her clothes more witchy than sparkles, witch marks forming on her eyes and hands). Since normal witches in this reboot aren't like that, it's all about balance, she oozes magic uncontrollably and seems crazy. (She has amnesia after this, and has flashbacks in moments of discomfort, not so much of what she did, which fortunately wasn't too much, but of how she felt, which was horrible and do bavkslash feelings in bad moments)

The Infinity Swan was the first animal to be subdued and survive wild magic, the first burst of it, which the universe had been carrying for a long time, so the animal is... peculiar. It can fly on land (like a mole, but no actually) and in space, and that's the most normal thing about it. Other animals instinctively respect him. Bloom once compared him to an angry goose (and she's right).

In this world, Hike's explosion that gave rise to Magix also formed the Shaab Stones (from the comics, they cancel magic). Discovered by a certain Halcyon, they're used from time to time. (Because I believe every lore should have at least one such object, also there are some of them in the various prisons such as Fonterrossa)

Each planet has its own calendar, which is a total mess (different rotations and stars, solar and lunar calendars, etc.). But intergalactically, they follow the Hike/Magix calendar.

There is a relatively new trend among witches, to follow the Fourhold or Crossroad Legacy (four moons phases, directions, seasons, ethereals, loves, temperaments, elements, cards suits, ace/king/queen/knight, human facets). CT teach both (the other being the Rule of Three) as none is better than the other.

I think I'll write a mini-post with my personal next gen and leave the rewinxing, it's like be like screaming into the void.

[coral-nerd]

i need

i need you to rant about coral island

please

what do you like/not like about the game it's v important to me (i wanna know and none of my friends play so i cant bother them)

I WILL TAKE ANY OPPORTUNITY TO RANT!!!

In exchange, I hope to recieve a rant in return!!

Recently the lack of updates is starting to worry me. I don't mind waiting years to reach the Final Version, but the save I specifically have to test out new features has maxed everything out and been untouched for a while. There used to be a roadmap of when we could expect certain updates, so the radio silence in comparison is troubling.

I think the one thing I would change about the game is the character customization. They have a great variety of hairs (though they could use more curly options), and I love having a color wheel (even if it is hard for me to use) but the 3 body types are incredibly limiting, and the facial features don't make much difference when you only see the farmer from above at an angle. I also just don't really like any of the clothing options. If you want hoodies, you're covered! Sneakers? Sure thing! Sweatpants? They got 20! Anything else? Ehhhhhhhhhhhggg....

The thing the game does best is the npcs. Every single one has such a DISTINCT personality! Everyone goes on an on about how Hot everyone is, but I love that you could take any character and quickly learn what their Goal in life is. What they love, Who they love, where they like to be... and for such a large cast, the variety is spectacular!

But by far my favorite thing about Coral Island is Coral Island itself. The fact that every single home and shop has been decorated with such detail and care! The beauty of the plants, the pathways, the little critters that pop up here and there. When I'm having a hard day, I like to just run around the island and Look at it. And if I had time I could spend a full real day just poking around the islander's homes. I think about a year back I had a series of posts that was just me finding easter eggs in people's homes; there's a lot of great stuff!

I like that I can take it slow; nothing horroble happens if I miss a day, or forget an event, or if a store is closed on a day I wanted it open. I can always come back later, and just take my time. Sure it's fun to clean the ocean and clear the mines year one, but you don't Have to.

I like how you progress through time, especially that you can really see the Impact you have. Purwo forest changes every year (and so do the baby owls!), new shops open, the Hot Springs and Temple become so gorgeous, dialogue changes, and... well I don't want to spoil some of the rank S changes XD

I like that year one you basically Can't win any of the festival minigames, but you come back the next year stronger than ever and can really see just how far your abilities and stamina have changed. Year one you learn the lay of the land, year two you are Part of it.

I do think it's a bit weird that you unlock the full hotspring experience and all the cooking items so late into the game that there's nothing that takes your stamina away to the level you Need energy boosters. It's a bit of a wasted mechanics opportunity. Not that I can think of a way to do it differently.

I'm not currently enamored with the merfolk side of the game, but I'm hopeful that more updates will get me invested in that as well.

The unlockable areas kinda scare me with how Vast and empty they are. Irl I'm terrified of wide open spaces, so in game I tend to avoid the new places. I also kinda thought there would be more Lore attached to those places, but maybe that's a later update.

One of the things I secretly love is how you can tell the game wasn't made by Europeans, Americans, what have you. There's much more focus on familial duty and community than I've seen in most media. Some of the dialogue is clanky and frankly janky. Definitely not written by a native English speaker.

I like when dialogue glitches and you can see <npc name> {item name} because it really makes me appreciate how every single tiny detail had to be thought out, planned for, and executed by a person out there who I hope had a lot of fun creating something they could share.

I know this is the only game I play besides the sims, and clearly I don't know anything about gaming or have anything to compare Coral Island to, but I wish other gamers didn't try to just Rush the game and then compare it's mechanics to other things they've played.

I had a weird moment showing Coral Island to 2 of my gamer buddies, and they were accurately calling out every mechanic before it happened, and seemed so Bored before giving it a chance. Like, "yep, there's the typical 'giving you your farming tools' scene." "Duh, the shipping bin." "The ax animation is so weird." "What do I gain from talking to npcs?" "This town is too big, I don't think I'm ever gonna get it." "Rancher, store owner, disguised character customization, yeah yeah."

And that's just not at all the Point of the game I fear. And I don't ever want to get to the point where I don't think it's cool for games to have built-in mechanics to give you what you need, no strings attached. Or think talking to the npcs isn't Interesting enough to do for it's own sake.

In a world where everyone's going fast, I like the opportunity to choose to take it slow. To like things just because they're pretty. And to watch a game change over time because I gave it a chance before it was ready.

I'm not going to get another gaming experience like this, and I'm so glad I did.

Thank you so so much for inviting me to rant, and I'm looking forward to hearing other people's thoughts!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Was I the AH for making a joke no one told me they didn't like?

This happened back when I was 12.

I was pretty... not popular, but friends with a lot of semi-popular figures in a certain fandom. I know you aren't supposed to be on social media until you're 13 and all that, but it was a good while ago [2019ish] and I was a kid who never made friends IRL.

One of my friends [16, I think?] had a delusion [it was a diagnosed disorder they had and told me about, if I remembered I would tell you, MAYBE OSDD but I think it was something else] that they were one of the characters from the show the fandom was about.

I had other friend groups into the same show, and I would often make jokes "pretending" to be one of the characters [usually just posting a memed up version of a screencap and mimicking the speech pattern of the character], which would land well and make them laugh, so I saw no issue using this joke around the friend with delusions [who I'll call Lucas]. I only did it twice.

The first time I didn't notice anything different, but the second time they started treating me like this character [who I later learnt but didn't know at the time Lucas recalled having memories of being in a romantic relationship with]. Lucas was the only person I knew who had these types of delusions, so I didn't know what to do and just went along with it until they, uh... "snapped out of it", I guess?

Soon after, I was added to a group chat with a few other people. All of them were 16, except for who we'll call Dawn, who was 12 or 13, and who was the leader of their whole group. I'll call the other people Rosa [someone who I had gotten in a huge argument with before for a reason I don't remember but I think she started it and I overreacted, if this was about that it'd probably be YTA or ESH, but I apologized and we didn't really talk anymore], and Nate [someone who I hadn't ever talked to outside of a large group setting]. Lucas was also there in this group chat.

They were staging an... intervention? They were basically making me explain my actions and were telling me how I was a horrible person for "tricking Lucas into thinking I was this character". Lucas wasn't very responsive to the situation, and I was pretty sure Dawn was the one who orchestrated the whole thing and roped Lucas into it, maybe as a confidant or something like that. Rosa brought up how awful I was to her before, and how she never forgave me even though I thought she did. Nate also brought up how "aggressive and violent" I was, citing one of the only times I had talked to him [which I thought was just a funny way to greet someone, akin to like "*knocks a door off its hinges and it explodes everywhere, I take several minutes trying to put it back together but it clearly isn't done well* Hi guys"], using a screenshot he had taken MONTHS prior and had been saving for that moment, he told me.

I was supposed to go out shopping, so I couldn't keep on checking my phone without my parents getting suspicious of me. I was also hyperventilating and kept on having to take breaks to make sure I didn't freak out. I kept on trying to reply to things in chronological order, and they were getting more and more progressively upset. I told them the first part about my parents getting suspicious, and one of them even told me that "your parents should know what kind of sick fuck you are, maybe then you'll understand your actions." Eventually, we DID go shopping, and I couldn't reply for several hours.

When I got back, Dawn and Rosa had made several call out posts on their social media each, and I had several DMs from other people about it. I couldn't read the posts, and all I did was deactivate my account. I couldn't post art I had done online until about a year ago, couldn't even think about the show until a few months ago when my friend wanted to try it out, and I still can't go onto that social media platform because it makes me so nervous and I can't breathe, afraid that someone will recognize me even now and "expose me". Lucas wanted to keep in touch, but they were a bit clingy and only came to me when they were having mental breakdowns. I couldn't handle the constant reminders, so I eventually deleted their number.

Note: while I am very safe about my identity online, these people [at least Dawn, since she said how old she was before me and even showed pictures of herself in cosplay online before, she WAS very 12] did know what age I was [I had lied about it before then to other people].

I still feel really bad about this, and I was wondering if I really was being an asshole. Maybe I was just being biased because I was the one being persecuted? I don't know. Maybe I was the AH because I was suffering from the horrible illness sweeping the nation called being 12 years old?

I'm sorry if this is a little silly, but I'm 17 now and this is still a part of my past I'm ashamed of.

Could you tag this post "12 year old confrontation" so I can find it? Thank you. Sorry, again.

What are these acronyms?

[proxylynn]

[This is a lovely gift from the magnificent @dejyn. The first of I hope many more interactions between our Puss in Boots: The Last Wish OCs. (I'd love to join in more with the community)]

{But now for something completely different...A narrative story.}

------

Melody had been working harder lately, catching the attention of a certain shadow. For all the fear and intimidation she holds over the rest of the staff, Little Lynn respects those who show real dedication. She sees the lass putting in effort where others coast, and it sparks a budding camaraderie. Melody wants to be better, to learn new skills and maintain usefulness. So, who better to help train her than the one who whips the guards into shape and brings beasts to their knees? Melody expects the harshness she's witnessed being dealt to others. What she gets is different. Little Lynn sees potential in the woman and admires her efforts, so she gets a feeling for how to handle the little flower to get her to bloom.

While weapons training is on hold for now, Melody's recent progress has earned her a reward. Little Lynn pulls her aside for a night ride, a mix of learning the border lands and the relaxing nature of riding a proper steed.

"And you're sure this is fine?"

The worry in Melody's question is met with a chuckle from Lynsie.

"Calm yourself. Master Jack knows. And if he's going to chew someone out, it'll be me. Besides...You'll like this."

This raised some interest, but it wasn't spoken. As they ventured beyond the city grounds and into the wild of the open, it only vaguely registered how late it was. Was this really a good time to be riding?

"Melody, dear. Do you trust me?"

Not exactly a question one wants to hear while being guided out at night away from others.

"Yes."

"Good. Because this is something I don't show others."

The brunette points to a space between trees off the path.

"I want you to follow me through there."

"But there's no path there."

"No. But that's a good thing."

"It is?"

"You'll see. This is worth it."

With a light tug of the reins, the black unicorn darts off.

"Come along, Melody!"

Not given much time to question and not wanting to be left alone, Melody hurries her anxious mount to follow. Galloping close behind, the night makes the trees and every random sound more eerie than they are; from the nightmarish branches looking like hungry claws about to snatch at them, to the ghostly hoots and howls that echo all around them. The fear comes to a head when Lynsie disappears into some ample vegetation and makes a sharp whistle that makes Melody's unicorn slow down. Sensing there's a reason, Meldoy doesn't force the creature to resume speed and allows it to gradually trot beyond the vegetation where Lynsie is waiting.

"Good. Glad to see you did join me."

"If I'm honest with you, I wasn't sure about doing so."

"I know. But I also know you're braver than you let on. I wouldn't push you into something I didn't think you were ready for."

A smile comes to the azure-haired woman, the praise almost distracting from the scene happening in the distance before them. Some ways away yet within full view, there's a glen. And in that glen is what appears to be a small family of white horses playing in fireflies, a clear leading male and mare along with a pair of foals. Yet even in the dim lighting, it's clear they aren't normal horses. The animal's body is cloud white, but the head is purple, with glowing blue eyes, and a long and twisted horn on its forehead is white at the beginning, black in the middle, and red at the end.

"What are they?"

"Those are Oricuerno. They are native to this land, you can think of them as Spain's version of these lovelies."

Lynsie pets her Unicorn, making the dark stallion nicker.

"They also differ from our Unicorns in that they have the legs of a fallow deer and the tail of a lion. And by their hooves, they have these tiny pairs of wings."

"They can fly?"

"No. From what I've seen, the wings help make them swifter and may increase their jump by some, but they do not provide any flight."

A thought comes to Melody, and an undeniable question follows it.

"Does Jack know of them?"

Lynsie's response is merely putting a finger to her lips. A surprising thing from her, implying she's withholding information.

"Master Jack knows of them, but they avoid his attempts at capture. I found this family while border patrolling, and it occurred to me...The stables are mighty full as is. Maybe one day, I'll surprise him with a little colt. But for now...I believe everyone is fine as is. Don't you think?"

Melody looks at her and then at their Unicorns. Their steeds have had their horns cut at such a young age and made into simple riding mounts. Their magical identity was removed, and their freedom was lost. Her gaze then shifts to the Oricuerno, seeing them happy and wild.

"Yeah. ...Everyone is fine as is."

Lynsie gives a knowing smirk.

"Yeah. It is."

[mycomicbox]

Random Thoughts on Triangle Strategy - Part 2

[Progress: Chapter IX, Part II completed]

<<< Part 1

One thing I've noticed is that the music in this game feels more... cinematic, as opposed to being super catchy tunes like in other games. Not to say that this is bad: this is a great soundtrack. It's just different.

Dawg why is Roland so squishy 😭 bro literally has a horse and a spear yet he has the defenses of soggy bread

Out of all my units, one that I've been relying on a lot is Anna. Take Cover allows her to safely get to key points on the field, Throw Poison lets her strike diagonally (and clock damage over time), and Act Twice can allow for up to 4 attacks in a turn when using follow-ups. I love her!

As for other useful units, honorable mentions to Hughette's status-inflicting arrows, Benedict's buffing, and Erador's ability to shove enemies. And that's not even mentioning the optional units you get through Character Stories.

I'm going to be real: in the midst of early-game battle, I keep forgetting that Quietus is a thing, even after spending hundreds of Kudos on them.

Enemy units are... really spongy. It's rare that I can ever get a one-hit KO on them from full HP. It's why I've been mainly investing in damage upgrades. Though, that might just be a skill issue on my part.

There was a part where you had to get Roland to a certain part of the battlefield (Game Over if he's KO'd). I lost this battle twice, so I put the game down to shower and have a snack. I was still thinking about a strategy even while away from the game.

Adding to the above point, when I got to the section when I was deciding what to do with Roland, I put the game down right before this point, and I was still trying to make my decision even when I wasn't playing.

My choices feel like they have real weight behind them. For instance, I chose to surrender Roland to Aesfrost, which triggered a fight with Landroi. When I beat him and looked at the burnt land, I questioned if I made the right call. I bet that this wouldn't have had the same effect if I didn't play blind.

"Wait, is Benedict going to kill—oh wait, this is one of those 'make the world believe you're dead' plot points. Nice."

[aslitheryprinx]

I wish that I were a streamer, bc what just happened to me is SO insane.

So despite having played Minecraft for years I've never actually beaten the game on a survival world. I always get distracted and end up creating a new world before I actually get to that point. Earlier today, I decided to log onto a slightly older world (like a year or so, not very old, but it's been a bit) since I'd already progressed pretty far.

I gather all my stuff and start hunting down the stronghold. It takes a bit, especially cause I'm not super practiced at this, but I find it! I also happen to find a bunch of old stuff from when I apparently died trying to find the stronghold ages ago- that was a nice surprise!

You know what wasn't a nice surprise??

The stronghold sitting snug up against the deep dark.

Honestly, at first I think it's pretty cool. It's the first time I've actually seen the deep dark in person, so I'm more intrigued than anything else.

I set my spawn, and start looking for the portal room.

I open a single door and hear a shrieker go off.

Darkness starts pulsing.

Right about then is when I start thinking 'ok this might be a Problem!!!'

I'm hoping the shrieker or catalyst or whatever it is that actually spawns the warden is outside the door, so I press my luck and go forward. I end up setting it off again, so I retreat to try and figure out my next move.

I'm wondering if I should just abandon this stronghold and find a new one, but that would be a pretty long journey. If I can just get rid of the catalyst, I should be set to explore the stronghold.

I leave the actual stronghold itself and start carefully going around looking for where the problem spot is, but I can't actually see anything important except for a diamond. I crouch the whole way, grab it, and come back to the top.

And then. A zombie villager sneaks up behind me and knocks me off into the deep dark.

I land on the catalyst, setting a shrieker off again of course.

Now, I wasn't sure how many times you could set the warden off. I thought it ran on a 3 strikes you're out system, so I am PANICKING.

I try to break the catalyst.

The catalyst is also under a water stream so I'm splashing around the whole time and. Of course. I set off a shrieker again.

The Warden spawns.

Somehow, I manage to swim back up the water stream without dying. I turn around. The Warden is about six blocks away.

It is at this point that I just fully pause the game to contemplate my fate.

Maybe I should've logged out at that point, to lose that aggro on myself. But I didn't think about that.

I was incredibly certain I was about to die, and having just gained back a ton of stuff that I'd been devastated by losing in the first place, (enough that I had kind of lost interest in this world originally), I decided that making sure I didn't lose any of my stuff was the priority.

And my spawn point was basically right there...

I dropped back into the stronghold and was almost immediately killed by the Warden. But when I respawned, I could see my stuff all right there, still safe.

New problem: the Warden had dropped down and was also right in front of my spawn point.

And thus begins my death loop.

I put all of my stuff save my sword in a chest- which didn't help the warden being mad at me- and decided to try and brute force kill this thing through multiple deaths.

But by the time I had everything situated, the warden had sort of disappeared.

It was still there. It was shooting me with sonic blasts and killing me over and over again. But I couldn't actually see it, so I couldn't kill it.

It was at this point that I decided to log out, get a snack, and come back with a clearer head afterwards.

I don't know if wardens despawn. I don't know if it's going to be there when I come back. But I'm in too deep now, I am going to find the portal room of this Stronghold if I have to kill the Warden with my bare fists to do it!!!!!

[wetcatspellcaster]

1, 2, 8, 12, and 16!

1. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multichaptered fics?

I mean, my ao3 speaks for myself :') I guess my history of multichap is less of a preference, and more of a complete inability to keep anything fucking brief

even the gale/durge fic was supposed to be a one-shot. smh.

2. Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?

It's a mixture of both. My last three fics have followed this pattern -

Write the first few chapters just chilling, seeing where things go. Hit the first point that feels like a 'turning point' (in pieces this was infamous chapter 7). then I outline and plan, once I know the fic is going to happen for real.

Typically, I plan what happens in a chapter, but not necessarily every step in the process. It depends how writing the chapter is going - outlines get more detailed, the more I'm struggling. atm, I'm stuck on the modern AU, so I am writing bullet points whenever i have energy so I have something to help me. sometimes I'll work off a one sentence notice, and the action will be vivid enough in my mind for that to work.

8. Do you prefer the beginning, middle, or end of a story?

depends on how reliant the story is on romance. if it's a romance-heavy fic, the middle for certain, bc the tension between two people getting together is my favourite part, and established relationships are comforting to read but they're sometimes difficult to progress as a writer.

i also like endings though! often because the ending of a thing will have become more and more vivid to me in time, so it's nice to finally put that final set of images down on paper. particularly if I stick the landing :'))

12. How does receiving or not receiving feedback/support impact you?

aghhhh, a dangerous question

I'm a very pessimistic (and currently very depressed) person. I require a hell of a lot of positive reinforcement, for a dumb bitch who's chosen to be in academia. I'm not sure I would still be writing, if people hadn't commented and read my early fics, in my dragon age era. I'm not sure I'd value the work I put into the world, if people hadn't shouted at me and told me it was valued.

this kind of changed with pieces 'blowing up' (i don't like that phrase). receiving that amount of feedback was amazing, but it was also overwhelming. it felt weird, to become 'known' - this is my introvert hobby, i like not being perceived. Now that it's passed, I also firmly believe no fic I write will ever be that popular, ever again. which isn't that no fic will be as good or better, but pieces was a perfect storm of a fandom i'd already written for, tropes people liked, and the height of bg3's popularity. my writing wasn't magically better in pieces, than in other fics. I will never get that amount of attention again, unless I start deliberately chasing trends or popular fandoms, which I don't want to do.

...and that's totally ok. Since pieces, I've consciously tried to just write ideas for myself, and not for feedback. feedback is the nice added bonus. but it also proved to me how much fandom/fic popularity is not about quality, and more about timing. your audience is determining a lot more than your writing necessarily is :')

so, to answer your question, to receive feedback or not to receive feedback impacts me a lot. receiving it will always make me feel like a better writer, because I'm very harsh on myself and I see none of the good things in my work that other people see. Someone saying 'oh this was good' has me replying 'oh fuck, really?' not shouting into a void is always fabulous.

but not receiving feedback is also an utter relief. I loved writing so much of the modern AU just for myself and one other person. it's nice to have a fun, medium sized audience of people I recognise, and people I'm writing for. bc i'd rather have just my own enjoyment, or a smaller group of core people who i know like my writing, than have a flash in the pan of like "WOW THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER" who never stick around

woof. long answer.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

All of my fic ideas are published or publishing! :)

but I'm fighting off a dragon age rook concept (an orlesian mage who fled from the circles after the college system was introduced and then became a prodigious 'assassin', killing people with magic) with my bare fucking hands.

get to know your writer

[aihoshiino]

hi!! this is a 'lil out of the blue but i've been thinking about chapter 132, and if you're ok with me asking, what's your opinion of ruby and nino's versions of what Ai would say? When I first read Ruby's interpretation, it didn't strike me as unlike Ai per-se, but I've gotta admit, Nino's answer rang true to me in a way Ruby's didn't. But for the life of me, I can't seem to narrow down why (´･ω･`)?

It bothers me, because while the words themselves sound plausible, Nino's interpretation of the feelings behind them is all wrong. I don't remember her exact words, but it was something like, 'she was so far above us that she wouldn't even remember what i said. my words couldn't bother her.' To Nino, its just more evidence that Ai was a perfect idol. but we know that's not true at all? in the first place, Ai had genuine trouble with her memory, even when it came to her most important people, so her forgetting something isn't the same as her like.. asserting dominance or w/e. And I'm certain, especially after chapter 133, that every time Nino said something cruel to Ai it hurt her deeply. If it looked like Ai simply brushed it off, it's because she was putting in a ton of effort to keep her head up. Knowing all that, it makes it so hard to agree with Nino. I do and I don't at the same time?

I feel nervous speculating about it because it's disrespectful to put words in Ai's mouth, but what do you think she would've done in that situation? Me personally, I think it might land somewhere between what Ruby said and what Nino said. Because Ai was constantly trying to connect and love the people around her, I can believe she'd extend kindness towards Nino like Ruby did, but at the same time she was hurting so badly that saying "it's all good" wouldn't communicate her true feelings. Being okay takes time, you can't just flip a switch on it. If anything, I think it'd thrust her into a kind of despair, where she can't communicate the true complexity of her feelings for fear of pushing Nino away, but not giving voice to them makes her feel so acutely like a liar, and the last thing she wants is to respond to Nino's genuine regret with a lie. She's so trapped in it (┬┬﹏┬┬).

sorry this is so long btw!! these characters are so easy to ramble about there's so much to them ^^;

Sorry for the wait on a response to this one! It was such an interesting question I ended up rolling it around in my head all week before I felt fully confident that I could get across how I wanted to respond to it.

What I think it ultimately comes down to for me is that Nino is not wrong in how she says Ai would respond - in fact, I think she's correct in saying that Ai would have responded in the way Nino would've wanted to hear and that she would've chosen the sort of, path of least resistance of pretending she didn't even remember she'd been hurt. This feels the most consistent to me with the invincible, flighty persona Ai puts up when she's not quite feeling 100% and it also lines up with how she describes herself in the Spica novel.

Serious talks weren't her cup of tea, and she detested the weighty atmosphere they brought. [...] So, with the same nonchalance, she declared her departure. Things always went smoother without unnecessary drama.

(source is my in-progress TL of the free preview chapter i promise i'll finish it soon [<- in tears])

Where Nino stalls is in her understanding of Ai's motivations. In her mind, the cruelty she subjected Ai to wasn't even worth remembering— Ai was invincible, untouchable and inhuman so even if her words had stung in the moment, there was no way that she'd even remember being targeted by Nino. It should go without saying that this is not reflective of the real Ai in the least.

This is why Ruby, though I don't think she quite sticks the landing, is the one of the two who actually making calls about Ai in line with who she was as a person. While she doesn't properly understand the depths to which Ai was fighting every day to just be okay with things at that moment in time, she intuits something just as important quite naturally and without even seeming to realize she's doing it— Ai's kindness, her desire to help and reach out to people and her instinctive gestures of warmth and outreach when she sees someone who's in pain. Ruby acts on this kindness with barely a moment's thought and ends up embodying the real Ai's heart so vividly.

This is why Nino reacts with such immediate derision. The real Ai's human heart is something that repulses her— she rejects it any time she catches so much of a glimpse of it. It's natural then that she'd dismiss Ruby's earnest, clumsy and honest portrayal; imperfect, but truthful in the ways that really matter.

In short, I think Nino was right, but for the wrong reasons and in turn, Ruby was wrong, but for the right reasons.

I think Ai genuinely would've forgiven Nino in her own way— to her, her expression of "Oh, did you say that?" and pretending to have forgotten it would have been her way of telling Nino it was all water under the bridge and that she has no hard feelings. We know she wanted so, so badly to be friends with the other girls in B-Komachi and I think having Nino reach out to her would have made her so incredibly happy, happy enough that she would've been tripping over herself to forgive Nino of everything if it meant not losing a chance at forming that connection.

Of course, to Nino, it just would've been more proof of how she viewed Ai and more fuel for her belief of Ai as this untouchable, inhuman idol. The sad reality is that I don't think there was ever a chance for Nino and Ai to connect once things went south. That well had been too thoroughly poisoned.

and that's why they should kiss. thank you for your time.

[mdhwrites]

I don't know if you've watched Gravity Falls or been deep in the fandom but I just realized how similar Luz and Mabel kinda are. They're both young quirky girls whose selfish actions helped the main villain achieve their goal (supposedly, in Luz's case) and learn the lesson of facing reality instead of being stuck in a fantasy world where they get everything they want (although Luz doesn't really learn this even though it was kinda set-up for her in s1) (they also have a girl rival with shit parents that the fandom ships them with but anyway-)

I'm not saying this to shit on Luz though, I like Luz. But it mind boggles me how Mabel gets shitted on way more than her does despite being younger, actually learning her lesson, and apologizing for it. It might because they're different shows but I know a lot of TOH fans were/are GF fans because of the creators' relationship so the fandoms aren't that different from one another. It MIGHT be because Mabel trusted Blendin so easily despite the situation being shady as hell (while Luz just thought Philip was a normal human in the demon realm) but to be fair, Mabel was cornered in a moment of vulnerability and she literally didn't even know what she was giving him. Abandoning her friends and family for her own fantasy land while an apocalypse going on was really horrible, I won't deny that, but Luz also pretty much did the same when she chose the demon realm (place she doesn't know anything about with STRANGERS) over her own world in the first episode. Sure there wasn't anything horrific going on in the human realm so her ignorance of it wasn't as bad as Mabel's– BUT THEN in TTT she thinks of leaving everyone behind by staying in the human realm while the Collector was doing who knows what???

I don't know, this might be kinda petty, I haven't rewatched GF in ages, but I just think it's unfair Mabel gets more hate than Luz. I feel she's had more character progression compared to the latter and at least she always got called out when she did something wrong and learned from it.

So take all of this with a grain of salt because while I've heard a little of this discourse, I haven't watched a lot of Gravity Falls (recently tried again and found myself not loving the first episode if I'm honest) and have never been a part of its fandom. However, this is a chance to talk about why Luz is so liked and 'relatable' to so many because it is not hard to figure out why people like Luz. Why? Well... A lot of it comes down to framing and how the two shows see the two girls.

Gravity Falls sees Mabel as a tweenage girl.

The Owl House sees Luz as the embodiment of what a teenage nerd wishes they were/could be.

Those are VERY different goals and framing.

One, Mabel, is going to be INCREDIBLY fallible. Neither her or Dipper are anywhere close to perfect people because... Well, they're teenagers. They get way too into certain things. They're awkward when it comes to those obsessions. They're awkward about how to deal with change, consequences, etc. like that because that's just the age they are. They're figuring out the world and are going to run face first into it and that will be awkward, clumsy and often destructive without any sort of excuse besides they didn't think the consequences through. That's kids for you.

The other is... More idealistic. Luz doesn't face real consequences for testing her boundaries and is always bailed out. When she fucks up, she always does it with the best intentions and/or no one actually gets hurt. People coddle her and always make concessions to her desires with minimal push back and always end up on her side unless they're just a REALLY big meanie head. She always makes peoples' lives better, she never gets real criticism or ridicule for her interests and is always accepted by the right people for those interests. Always given more and more for being her quirky self!

A lot of this for Luz is because she's an audience surrogate and TOH wants the audience to feel good about themselves. It knows that a lot of nerds will be the ones watching it and leans in. This is actually contrasted by the fact that, well, Mabel isn't the audience surrogate or the absolute primary character of Gravity Falls. Her role is more complicated versus Dipper who IS the nerdy one who's closer to being the audience surrogate.

Just to really drive this home: People on my Discord have talked about this and one of the biggest 'crimes' as seen by a lot of the fandom is that Mabel causes Dipper to lose out on his dream of researching with Ford and staying in Gravity Falls. I could even see some arguments of things like "He's planning a future!" or "He's making the world better!"

But... Let's shift the framing for a moment from "Mabel caused Dipper to give up on his dream" to "Mabel made sure Dipper chose reality over fantasy." After all, his desire was to throw away his friends, his family, EVERYTHING to just continue hanging out with this one old dude and studying the weird phenomenon of the world, an inherently isolating job. He gets to go on this big adventure and follow his intellectual drive... At the cost of reality and everything he has known.

So why don't people get upset at Dipper for trying to do this? Well, there's a lot of potential reasons that I can't really narrow down without watching the show. It may have just been framed as a positive while Mabel's is framed as negative. It could be that while Mabel's is just a generic, girly fantasy that not much of the core audience actually wants, Dipper's is the cool, smart fantasy that is totally not just a fantasy, but a CAREER. Or it could go back to the root problem: Because Dipper is closer to the audience surrogate, closer to the main character, there is a bias to inherently see his actions as good. We could literally watch two characters do the same thing and we will root for the main character simply because that is who we are trained to root for.

A great example of this from TOH is how Luz is allowed to get mad at people for lying to her but not the other way around. She literally attacks Eda and gets the two captured in Titan, Where Art Thou? because Eda lied to her and she is supposed to feel justified in this anger to make the tragedy angle work. Meanwhile, there is ONE time when anyone gets mad at Luz for lying and honestly, the framing and reactions cause it to end up feeling much more like it was just for a prettier scene change during Reaching Out. After all, Amity still wants to fix Luz's pain before Luz even apologizes for breaking her word by lying. So why doesn't anyone call out the hypocrisy here? Why is NO ONE allowed to get upset with Luz about this?

Because she's the main character. Because we are trained to root for her and, well, Luz also is the one we are told to want to be. She is the every nerd. She is meant to connect to a very wide net of outcasts who feel like they don't belong and wish things were different. Wishes people weren't mean to them or didn't get mad at them when they made mistakes. That just let them be the hero of their own story.

So of course, they don't want Luz to be yelled at, even when that is the actually human and reasonable thing for someone to do. They don't want to question what she does so when the show gives them an excuse, or they have to go to reality if the show itself doesn't give an excuse (This is why people emphasize Luz's age and nuerodivergence to excuse her while bluntly ignoring Mabel's age when it comes to her actions), so that they don't have to recognize that Luz does some REALLY shitty things, especially in the back half of the show. It is simply more convenient for the narrative they want out of the show for Luz to be this way.

And that is okay from a casual standpoint. A lot of fiction is escapist. There's nothing wrong with wanting to jump into a world where you're never actually wrong and never in trouble. Where your angst is always met with hugs and understanding rather than actual human emotion. That's how media works. Most mass appeal products are escapist. It's part of why the Isekai genre is SO prevalent right now because it is one of the purest forms of escapist fiction out there, especially due to modern isekai tropes.

But if you're going to talk critically about something, escapism is very rarely a good jumping off point for it. It will make you ignore a LOT about the work because it's uncomfortable for you to ask questions about it. I'm not talking about "Why does this world have magic" sort of things mind you. I'm talking about, say, "Why does this character get so many power ups, so easily, and with little effort in earning them?" When you want escapism, the pacing won't bother you. If you're actually looking at themes and payoffs, it will bother you a LOT. And yes, this does tie into TOH because if you want to be Luz, getting the glyphs feels great! If you actually interrogate the story, you go "Wait, they hadn't actually done like... ANYTHING with her not having magic in a magical world and she already gets a spell? And two of these spells she does literally nothing for. Arguably three since she is put into timeout as a punishment and gets the glyph I guess for being a bad person." That TOTALLY is good storytelling and makes sense with positive themes and proper explorations of its own ideas.

*sigh*

It's a rough push and pull and it can make it so people, even if they like the show, who disagree with the popular opinion, the one that usually lifts up the audience flattering elements the most, are just in a rough position where they hear the same opinions over and over again. All while knowing that if they speak up, they'll be stomped on.

Just like Mabel was while Dipper was raised into the spotlight. At least by the fandom.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.