#and kinn will be all 'okay ask me anything what do you want to know'

[the-cookie-of-doom]

“Angel, will you bring me my phone?” Kim called from the balcony. He heard it chime in the living room, but was too comfortable with his guitar to get it himself. Chay was closer, anyway. 

“Sure,” Chay called back. He unburied himself from the piles of notes, books, and homework he’s been accumulating all afternoon, and located Kim’s phone amidst the mess he’s made of the coffee table. Kim had message previews disabled but Chay saw the sender’s ID. “It’s Kinn.” 

“Thanks.” Chay drifted back towards his homework, but not before Kim gave him a sweet kiss on his hip and an encouraging pat to his butt. Kim watched him go, full of so much fondness and love for the other boy, he somehow wondered how he could survive the weight of it. 

Then Kim opened his messages, and all the warmth left his body in the same rush that stole the breath from his lungs. 

From: Kinn It’s time to come home Pa is dying 

Kim called his brother. Kinn picked up before the end of the first ring. 

“What happened?” Kim asked, distantly proud of himself for keeping his voice even. 

“Pa has cancer. Stage four, according to the doctor. Started in his liver, spread to his lungs. They’re suspecting his brain, as well.” 

“What? How—since when?”

“Nearly two years now.” Kinn took a deep breath, He kept his voice steady, too, even though this had to be destroying him. “He was hiding it from us. Said he didn’t want us to worry.” 

“Bullshit.” 

“I believe him, Kim. He wouldn’t—he wouldn’t want to look weak. It’s why he retired to Chiang Mai. You know how he is.” 

Another wave of cold. “I didn’t know he retired,” Kim said flatly. 

“Oh.” A beat. “He did. Four years ago, now. Soon after…”

“After I left.” All this time, hating his father for never coming to see him. The entire time he was on the other side of the country, and no one bothered to tell Kim. Of course they hadn’t, he’d made it very clear when he stormed out that he didn’t want contact with any of them. “What… what do we do, now?”

“Tankhun has already moved up North to take care of Pa. I’m taking a sabbatical from the company to join him. I—we would appreciate it if you could come too.” 

Kim felt his throat close up around any words he might have said. 

“Not for long. Only a few days, at most. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t serious, Kim, but we don’t know how much time he has left. Please, I… Please.”

Kim hated the desperation in his brother’s voice. Would do anything to spare them both. 

“No, I—I’ll come.” Kinn breathed a deep sigh of relief. Before he could do anything like thank Kim, he rushed to add, “I can’t promise how long I’ll stay. I’ll need to see how much—”

“Just a few days. Anything you can spare.”

“Okay. Okay, I… I’ll be there.” 

“Thank you, Kim. I’ll let Tankhun know. Tell me when you have your travel details.” 

“I will.” Feeling eyes on his back, Kim looked over his shoulder to find Chay hovering in the doorway, watching him with concern. “I have to go. We’ll talk soon.” 

“Is everything alright, P’Kim?” Chay asked softly, after Kim hung up. He approached quietly, Kim turned back around, staring out at the cityscape beyond the balcony. He still had his phone in hand.

“My father’s dying,” Kim said numbly. 

“Oh, no.” Immediately Chay’s arms fell around him, pulling him into the safety of his boyfriend’s chest. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

“I… don’t know.” Kim didn’t know what he was feeling, if anything at all. “I shouldn’t be. He’s my father. And he’s—” 

“I don’t think there’s a right way to feel,” Chay soothed, working his fingers through Kim’s hair. “But I think it’s also probably still a shock? Why don’t we go sit down? I think we’ve both worked enough today, let’s just—yeah. Sit down. Let it, uh, sink in.”

“Okay.” 

Kim let Chay take his guitar and lay it aside. He let himself be led back into the living room, which had unofficially become Chay’s workspace during these shared days. He watched Chay clear away his school clutter into an unorganized pile—he would probably regret it later—and then let himself be pulled down onto the sofa, into Chay’s chest. 

[veliseraptor]

ok ok inspired by the recent success of the three sentence meme going to try my regular pre-flight 150 words meme. aka send me a number from the list of fics below and I will write 150 words in that fic

1. Pete sat down on the floor. Porsche, hovering, gave him a worried look. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing,” Pete said, then adjusted, “sitting.” 

“I can see that,” Porsche said. “Are you okay?”

Pete laughed. “No,” he said. He didn’t know when he was going to be okay again.

“Um,” Porsche said. After a couple seconds he sat down on the floor with Pete and put an awkward hand on his shoulder. “Do you, uh, want to talk about it?”

“No,” Pete said again. He didn’t know what he would even say, if there was anything to say. He was so tired and it felt like any minute now Vegas was going to die again, and he was just waiting for it to happen. (reduce, reuse, recycle)

2. “Can I ask you something?” Xiao Xingchen asked. Xue Yang glanced in his direction, fingers pausing on his keyboard.

“Sure,” he said. “Sounds ominous. Hit me.”

“It’s nothing bad,” Xiao Xingchen said. “I was just wondering if you remember what you said when we first met.” Xue Yang had said no before, in the hospital, but it’d clearly been a lie then. He was hoping maybe the answer would be different now. Xue Yang made some kind of face, but it was hard to read. 

That, Xiao Xingchen thought absently, was one of the things he was going to miss most: the ability to see Xue Yang’s face and read his expressions. Not just because he liked looking at him, but because it was going to get even harder to tell what he was thinking. (Redux)

3. Which brought him here, in a room with a dirty, scruffy boy of indeterminate age (a skinny fifteen, maybe), his hands tied behind his back and an expression of casual unconcern on his face. Unconcern, except for the dangerous glint in his eyes that Jin Guangyao was going to be careful not to forget.

“I didn’t say to restrain him,” he said to the disciples who’d brought him back. He hadn’t, to be precise, told them to bring him at all, but there was no point in saying so now.

“He tried to attack me,” said one of them. 

“After you got in my face,” the boy said. “You deserved it.” (jgy teaches xy to read)

4. Oh, no, Pete thought again, but with a little more despair this time.

“Take Pete,” Khun Kinn said.

Vegas’s gaze swept to Pete, flicked slowly over him from head to toe. “Isn’t he one of Tankhun’s?” he said. “He won’t be thrilled that you’re loaning out his bodyguard to me.”

“That’s not your problem.”

“Considering Tankhun,” Vegas said, “it actually might end up being my problem.” (the devil drives)

5. That slight hitch. A correction. The muscles between Fenris’s shoulders tensed and he thought abruptly, disjointedly, of a red-haired woman sitting at a table in the Hanged Man, the sudden realization…

“Anders,” he said. The mage barely glanced at him, seeming distracted.

“That big thing in the sky is scarier,” said the young girl. She, unlike her father, was looking at Fenris. “I heard it’s full of demons that’re trying to come out. What’re those lines on your skin, mister?” 

“They’re tattoos,” Fenris said. His limbs felt heavy. He glanced toward his sword, three paces away. “Meant to imitate Dalish vallaslin.” He hadn’t meant to say that. Something was wrong. “Anders,” he said again.

Anders was looking at his hands and frowning. “Bloody hell,” he said. “Where did you find magebane?” (the best all lack conviction)

6. Malkar meant it when he’d said he was going to demand a lot of me. He said if I wanted to be a hocus - wizard - nobody could know where I came from. “Do you think the Mirador will welcome a whore from Pharoahlight?” he asked me. “No one must ever know where you came from. They’d throw you out on the streets. Now tell me about the Curia again, and for god’s sake, mind your vowels.” 

And when I didn’t do well enough, fast enough, there were always consequences.

“This is how you learn, Felix,” Malkar said while I was shaking on hands and knees at his feet. He bent down and took my chin and tilted my head back so I was looking up at him, but he was gentle about it now. “It is for your own good.” (Pygmalion)

7. “Why are you so eager,” Song Lan asked. Xue Yang laughed, his smile turning sharper, a little less pleased.

“Why wouldn’t I be? A chance to help these poor people. Wouldn’t miss it.” Song Lan waited silently, and Xue Yang’s eyes cut away. “I’m curious, Song-daozhang,” he said. “Is there something wrong with that? Walking around with you and your judgmental glare gets boring. Give me a problem to chew on, a mystery to figure out, something.” (Walking Far From Home)

8. “Tell me...tell me how we met,” Xiao Xingchen said.

A brief pause that made Xiao Xingchen’s stomach swoop with sudden unease. “What,” his friend said lightly, “did you forget that, too?” 

“I’m…” Xiao Xingchen wasn’t sure if he should apologize or not. He tried to remember, even if thinking made his head hurt, searching through his jumbled thoughts. Something about the smell of blood? A fragment of thought: at least I might be able to fix this.  “You were hurt,” he said, half a question.

“Uh huh,” his friend said. “That’s good.”

“And I found you,” Xiao Xingchen said, a little more confidently. “Helped you.” (xiao xingchen + concussion)

[ae-azile]

Progression, Chapter 21: Preview

“Would you like me to call Pete?” 

“No!” Tankhun says, feeling a buzzing, hurt rage in his head as he updates his Instagram feed. Again. Still no pictures or announcements.

“Why haven't they posted anything?!” he says, tossing his phone to the side, “Pete just posted the kittens yesterday! Vegas posted a story of Pete helping him cook breakfast with a heart as the caption this morning! Where’s the baby? Vegas was NOT holding some doll in the cemetery, and he referred to Pete as Papa!” 

“Maybe they adopted her and it isn't finalized yet,” Arm says gently, “Or maybe they are fostering her and can't post pictures. We don't know the situation, which is why I am offering to call and ask Pete for clarification. We talk to him pretty regularly, and I don't see him keeping this from us unless he had a reason.” 

“The reason is Vegas,” Tankhun mutters, “He probably told Pete to not tell us. He's rude like that.” 

Arm lets out a sigh and takes his hand, “Tankhun. You have been worried sick about Vegas the last few nights-” 

“Lies!” 

“You said you thought Douglas hurt him too, and then you have been blaming yourself ever since,” Arm continues, “Why don't you…talk to him?”

Tankhun stares at his deranged boyfriend incredulously, “Absolutely not.” 

“You said you used to babysit him a lot,” Arm says quietly, “And when you made a mad dash out of the safe room to get to me during the attack-” 

“To save you, which I did!” 

“You crossed paths with him, and he left you alone,” Arm says, “And when we found out about him getting shot, you broke down and cried.” 

“Hmph!” Tankhun says, because it is much more preferable than admitting Arm is telling the truth. 

“He's been the main thing keeping you from actually hanging out with Pete in person, but he never stopped it from happening the few times it has occurred,” Arm says, now massaging his hand, “He seems to be very content out of the business as well, and you just found out you, Kinn, and Kim may share an abuser with him-” 

“We don't know if that's true,” Tankhun says, feeling his voice grow hoarse, “He may have just had to pee.”

Arm breathes out, “...And he just so happened to drive out of his way to a cemetery to pee on the freshly dug grave of a man associated with your family?” 

“...Fine. That is far-fetched,” Tankhun says, “Maybe it was a witchcraft ritual, and that is why he was so okay with us holding a fake seancé. Vegas had a fixation on witchcraft when he was eight! I still think he likes the aesthetic, to be honest, but when he was little? He and I would be dark witches, and Kim would be a nice witch. That's all he would play for a while. Uncle Gun hated it, but Auntie Milan thought it was funny, especially when Vegas made a Ouija Board and we insulted our stupid, dead grandfather through it because we both hated him-” 

“Tankhun,” Arm cuts in, “You're doing it again.” 

Tankhun tilts his head at that, “What do you mean?” 

“Talking about your cousin with fondness.” 

“I did no such thing!” Tankhun says with a gasp. 

“Lies,” Arm says simply, and that is true, but still! 

“Will you be okay with never knowing for sure if Douglas hurt him?” Arm asks, “Because I would understand if that is the case. There is a lot of bad blood, and the feud your father had with your uncle strained things between you and your cousins. If you want to keep your distance, I will support you. But I thought…I don't know. We have been together long enough-” 

“Two years in a little over a month,” Tankhun reminds him. 

“It's coming up very soon,” Arm says, a small smile forming on his lips, “You have opened up to me a lot during that time. More than you ever did when I was just your friend and your guard. So I know enough to know that at one point, you really cared about Vegas. Loved him, even. And when we found out about Namphueng, you told me you wondered if we had fought for the right side.” 

Tankhun looks away at that, “...I felt that way because Pa faked his death, let us mourn him, and got people killed. And because Kinn told me Pa kept Namphueng locked in a room and away from her sons. I also felt that way because he told me Uncle Gun saw her and cried, which wasn't like him. Uncle Gun wasn't good either. He became despicable too. But he wasn't evil enough to lock a woman up in a room and keep her from her family for years, let alone medicate her with...whatever she was being given."

Arm says nothing, and Tankhun understands. No answer Arm can give will be a good one. If he defends Pa, it undermines everything horrible he did, and how many lives were ruined or ended because of him. If he sides with Uncle Gun and Vegas, then it would ignore the fact that several of his coworkers died by their hands.

But there is no denying Pa is the one who set it in motion, regardless of what happened to any of them. He and Kinn were just expected to fight for their lives until Pa thought it was appropriate to make himself known, and they just went along with it because that was all they knew. 

And when he thinks about it that way, he supposes Vegas was in a similar situation and trying to meet his own father’s horrible expectations, that he was groomed by him, just like Pa tried his best to groom his own sons, albeit in a different way. 

Just like he might have been groomed by Douglas like Kinn was. 

Just like Vegas may have been threatened or hurt by Douglas like he and Kim were. 

“Ugh, I'm mad at you!” Tankhun says, jumping to his feet to glare down at Arm, “I don't want to talk to you for the entire night!” 

Arm’s entire face drops, “Khun-” 

“The entire night! You can sleep on the couch!” Tankhun reiterates, then storms off to his room and slams the door behind him. He shuts his eyes and tries to stick to his resolve. How dare Arm make him overthink their strained family ties? He is supposed to be on his side! Also, it makes no sense for Arm to encourage him to reach out, even if Vegas had been hurt. Vegas hurt and killed several of their guards. They may not have been guards Arm was close with, but they were allies and their lives meant something. 

Even though Pa clearly felt differently, since he triggered the whole attack purposely. 

Arm is so annoying! If he weren’t so smart, compassionate, gorgeous, and incredible, Tankhun would be DONE. 

Although, Tankhun supposes he has made mistakes of his own in the past. Arm has just taken them in stride, or sometimes worked with him on the occasions Tankhun expressed he would like to change the way he reacts to certain triggers. 

But that doesn't make him less annoying! Arm is supposed to be aligned with HIM, with Pol coming in second because Arm loves Pol as a brother and Tankhun loves Pol too. 

Just like they love Pete. And Pete is with Vegas, which makes that relationship strained because their relationship with Vegas is strained. And now, Pete and Vegas have a baby, and Pete hasn't said a word. That's probably because a baby binds him and Vegas together forever, and that means Pete will never leave Vegas. 

Especially if Vegas actually treats him well and truly makes Pete happy. 

Ew! 

“What are you still doing on the couch?” Tankhun asks sullenly as soon as he opens the door again. 

Arm meets his eyes and lets out a sigh, “I did pace for a little while and hover my fist over the door. But I wanted to give you space if you needed it.” 

“No,” Tankhun says, lightly stomping his foot, “I want you in here.” 

“Ah,” Arm says, standing up, “I must have misunderstood.” 

Tankhun nods once in agreement, then leads Arm to his bed so they can both sit down. 

Their bed. Arm stays here more than enough for this to be their bed. 

“I can understand your concerning willingness to make up with Vegas,” Tankhun says, “You just found out one of your best friends is raising a baby with him. Of course you would like to extend an olive branch. Of course you would like to hang out with Pete in person a lot more. I get it, because…because I want those things too. It's just hard.” 

“I know.” 

“And…” Tankhun continues, swallowing the sudden lump in his throat, “The thought of getting Vegas’s confirmation that Douglas hurt him upsets me. I used to babysit him when he was younger. I used to adore him, and I know there is no point in denying that. So if he admits Douglas hurt him too, that means I failed him as well, and I don't know if I can handle that.” 

Arm puts his hand on his back and rubs it, “Would you be able to handle never getting a confirmation, always wondering, and just continuing to have weekly FaceTime chats with Pete? Or is that preferred over finding out what Vegas went through and possibly...mending things? I don't know if that's possible, but it might be a step in the right direction if the issue is thought out and approached in the right way.” 

Tankhun thinks on it, then breathes out, “I think it should be Kinn who reaches out. That would be the best way to go about this.” 

Arm looks slightly startled by that, “But he hates Kinn the most-” 

“But Kinn was also hurt by Douglas the most,” Tankhun interrupts, “And if Douglas actually managed to hurt Vegas, he may be bitter over the fact that Kim and I fought back and managed to get out of whatever Douglas planned to do to us. And if he got away from Douglas like we did, I…As much as he resents Kinn, I can't see him being happy about a fourteen year boy being sexually assaulted. I can't even see him being happy that Kinn went through something like that, because at one point, he loved Kinn.”

“...Do you think Kinn would be willing to admit that to him?” Arm asks. 

“I don't know,” Tankhun groans, “Probably not. But Porsche is in contact with Pete and Vegas and visits them. Maybe he can help set up and facilitate a conversation like that. I just…Fuck, Arm! You are SO annoying!” 

“You have said that before,” Arm acknowledges as Tankhun pulls out his phone. He sets up a group chat with Kinn, Porsche, and Kim before adding Chay at the last minute. Chay games with Macau and talks with him. Maybe that connection could provide a backup plan that Tankhun doesn't fully have formed in his head yet. 

But regardless…

Tankhun: I need to have an important meeting with the four of you. Kim, Chay, I know you two have been working on music all day, but please take a short break. I hope we can come to a decision about this and move forward with my plan within the next couple of days.

Kim: What is this about? 

Porsche: It sounds serious. There are no emojis. 

Tankhun: 🎾🐁🌬️🎫📟🖨️🩻

Kim: You never even use any of those. 

Tankhun: That's because I need to have a serious conversation with all of you. Come here. Now. Kinn, you too. 

Kinn: Is everything okay? 

Chay: What do you want to talk about? 

Tankhun takes a moment, then types one word. 

Tankhun: Vegas.

Tankhun: 🎰

[drk-mnd-fds]

Hello can you give us more facts on fallen dreamswap

Of course, no problem!

In fact, I would like to create just 1 large document with all the information, but I think I would edit it many more times, since I am constantly trying to find my own non-logical solutions in the canon and correct them.

It's useless enough for me to talk: "Tell me anything," because I get lost, I want to tell you everything at once, I keep repeating myself and so on, it's better to ask something specific. I have already told you the basics, but you still need to look for it in my posts below...

Well... I'll start the story, I'll tell you a few facts per character. I will try not to repeat myself with the last post, I will write facts that I did not mention somewhere other than my discord server, but rather that I did not post them on my discord server at all.

Nightmare.

– In fact, Nightmare won't be much stronger than Dream. Dream gained strength by eating 198 positive apples, the strength of Nightmare is equal if he ate somewhere around 90-100 negative apples. They both take out battles only at the expense of their skills. Nightmare is lower, faster and more agile, so he manages to dodge, he can't inflict any special injuries on Dream.

Dream changed negative energy to positive energy in Nightmare, since the nature of Nightmare is not used to and is not able to carry positive energy, so the negative began to absorb the positive, we can say that the negative returned in greater volume. The nature of Nightmare decided to make the negativity bigger and worse, just so that a similar situation would not happen again. It's just a defensive reaction of nature and the balance of the universe.

– Sometimes Nightmare experiences pain in the bones, but for this it must be surrounded by a lot of positivity. During the negative incident, the bones of Nightmare broke in some places, so that not only the back was damaged, but also the rest of the bones. In a couple of days, Nightmare has grown by 5 cm, so he is 170 cm tall.

– Nightmare sometimes experiences panic attacks at night, he wakes up from a strong feeling of heat in his body, anxiety makes it difficult for him to breathe and collect his thoughts. This state brings him back to the day of the negative incident, as these are the emotions he experienced when negativity filled his body again.

– There is a possibility that if you change negative energy to positive energy in Nightmare again, then Nightmare's body will not stand up and he will die.

– Nightmare is like a mother hen for Kevin, he began to protect him more. If Cross or Error accidentally offend Kevin, then Nightmare will start threatening them, but it won't come to action, he won't kill his friends.

– Yes, I make Nightmare look like a complete bastard, but in fact he won't leave any of his friends in trouble. Negativity gives him strength, but he will rather help his friends get rid of negative emotions so that they do not suffer.

– He feels that something is wrong with Error still can't figure out what it is.

– kinn song –  Robbie Williams - Party Like A Russian

Cross.

– Cross regrets what he did to Chara. During one of his rages, Cross was able to completely get rid of Chara.

– A kleptomaniac of 100500 level will not hold him, even if the thing is tightly glued to the place.

What? A new wardrobe and sofa in the BHS house? Nothing new.... WAIT, CROSS STOLE IT FROM SOMEONE AGAIN!

Cross, okay, you stole the vase... WHERE DID YOU TAKE THE CLOSET?! PUT THE CLOSET BACK IN PLACE!

– Cross will always be on the side of Nightmare. Yes, they sometimes have light fights, from which Cross leaves the loser, but still Cross does not know what must happen for him to betray Nightmare.

Cross was very angry with Dream when he saw what happened to Nightmare after the negative incident, Cross was ready to immediately go to JR Castle to deal with everyone there. Cross was not allowed anywhere by Error, who simply tied him to a chair.

– If we talk about strength, then Cross will be stronger than Nightmare, but still Cross will never fight Nightmare in full force.

– An idiot who can sometimes just fight with Nightmare.

– TURN BACK THE INSTINCT OF SELF-PRESERVATION TO CROSS!

– Cross sleeps with a stuffed penguin.

– kinn song –  GHOST - Honey I'm Home

Error.

– If you suddenly realize that coffee has disappeared all over the world, then know that Error bought it all.

– The mom of the band

is the very person who always stops Cross and Nightmare from making hasty decisions.

– Sometimes he can spend the whole night knitting, so in the morning there may be few things that can be taken to the shelter.

–  If the Error is on the verge of hysteria, then he will run away from the BHS house deeper into the forest so as not to disturb others and not feed the negative energy of the Nightmare once again. An Error can run away even in what he walked around the house in. At such moments, it is better not to touch him, he reacts very sharply even to touches from friends

– Error can often go to OuterTale, he bought himself a small house there a long time ago, just to take a break from everything, I can compare it to a sleeping cat in his favorite cot.

– When no one is at home, Error can do baking

– On missions, he often takes a secretive position and stays somewhere in the bushes, just to watch and be alert, although sometimes he can take an active part in the battle, even if he does not like it.

– He will sit quietly in an armchair with Kevin on his head and drink coffee, sometimes giving Kevin seeds, watching how Cross and Nightmare argue over small things.

– kinn song –  Set It Off - Horrible Kids

Dream.

– Dream is very sorry for what he did to Nightmare. Dream did not think that the negativity would return, he just hoped that the positive energy would simply replace the negative one and they could continue to live peacefully.

– Dream reviews all his notes on energy replacement several times a month, but he still cannot find a mistake in them.

– Dream keeps a photo of Nightmare on his desktop before the negative incident. Nightmare photo stands next to Anya's photo.

– There is a rumor that Dream adds a little cognac to his coffee or tea.

– Who knows when and how long he slept? Why did he manage to spend a couple of hours a day reviewing his notes, as well as filling out documents, being at a meeting at the shelter, helping Ink and much more?!

In fact, Dream just needs 5-6 hours of sleep to get enough sleep, and of course, the positive will give him energy

– Now he I want to swear much more often, but he restrains himself, still he does not like obscene language.

– Dream SAW how Error took things to the shelter, but he would never bring up this topic in front of anyone.

– kinn song –  Vundabar - Alien Blues

Ink.

– Sometimes he experiences phantom pains in his arm.

– The Ink was offered to make several more types of prostheses, but he refuses, saying that one is enough for him, which he wears on a regular basis.

By the way, the attachment of the prosthesis can be compared to the anime "Fullmetal Alchemist", before that the prosthesis moved exclusively on magic, but after watching the anime, I decided to change the device of the prosthesis.

– Dream is almost the only one who can help Ink with the prosthesis. Dream can remove the prosthesis so as not to hurt the Ink. Ink is regularly examined by doctors once a month, so Dream's help always helps out.

There are also a couple of scientists and a mechanic, but they specialize more if the prosthesis needs to be repaired somehow or slightly modified for further more convenient use. Doctors simply examine the body to identify any problems in connection with wearing a prosthesis.

– Do you see Ink sitting hugging his knees in huge shock? Nightmare and Dream are influencing him with their aura again.

MOREOVER, NIGHTMARE UNDERSTANDS PERFECTLY WELL WHAT INK IS DRIVING AT AND CONTINUES TO DO IT!

– He decided not to meet with Error anymore just to talk, because I completely distrust the BHS team.

– kinn song –  Сavetown – Devil Town

Blue. (I do not know what new things can be written about him, so I will duplicate my post)

— Blue only comes to JR Castle when Dream calls him, or if Blue suddenly gets bored. Often he just sits in the OuterTale and admires the stars

— If Blue comes because of boredom, he will start flirting with Dream, although he does this out of habit, in fact, he does not care deeply, he is paid for his work, and this is the main thing.

— From now on, Blue takes the position of searching for information. Dream only gives a task, so Blue goes to the anti-void to look for information from there, although he often calls Error to help him finish the search as quickly as possible and in greater volume.

— Due to all the drastic rearrangements of plans and frequent attacks by BHS after the negative incident, Blue experienced severe stress, after which he began to suffer from insomnia.

— Blue and Error made a deal, as Error also didn't like the whole situation with the negative incident, and they decided to work together to try to minimize the battles and damage as much as possible.

— During work, he always has a liter mug of coffee next to him, by the way, Blue likes how Error makes coffee, Error does it best.

"Sweet cake and sugar–free coffee is the best combination! What? Error, don't you agree? Well, swallow your empty coffee, and I'll have a cake!"

— Funny fact, Blue feeds street cats.

— Blue always carries bandages in his pockets to quickly wrap up wounds and not see blood, because of stress, his hemophobia has only gotten worse.

— During one of the battles, Cross severely injured Blue's cheek, feeling pain and seeing blood, Blue almost experienced a panic attack, fortunately Dream was nearby and was able to seal the wound with a plaster. The whole situation was too stressful, only Nightmare was happy about all this negativity. Since then, Blue has a scar on his right cheek, sometimes Cross can tease Blue that he mows under the Ink, although this scar remains because of Cross!

– kinn song – Guchiry feat. Flower - Abnormality Dancin' Girl

I FINISHED WRITING THIS A WEEK LATER!

I regularly reread the DreamSwap canon to be aware of where I've made mistakes. I could just forget about my own principles and continue with exactly the trash that I created in 2020, but it's a blessing that I was able to stumble upon Poison!DreamSwap, which pushed me to completely change the canon of Fallen!DreamSwap. I could have left Nightmare just a parody of the original Nightmare, but still I rewrote his canon several times.

Fan fact: I wanted to add songs in my native language to Kinn Songs, but I understand that my playlist is too cruel and in which case it would not be convenient for you to get into the translation of songs, given that it is very difficult to find adequate translations from my native language, if I need it, then I'm translating manually!

[the-wayside]

Because there is wine, there is the last snip. This is comes after the last part, but not directly. Kinn in this isn't honorable. He wants what he wants and he will do whatever he can to get it. There be ~feelings.

the memories of you, excerpt 3.

Previous parts.

One of the more inane tasks of the day is to be present over Kinn and Tawan’s dinner date. Porsche had tried to put someone else on it since it was inside the compound and the risk was low, but Pete had given him a ‘tough luck, buddy’ pat on the shoulder. So, he’s here, with Arm, the pair of them trying not to drill holes into their eye sockets over the boring childhood memories talk.

“What was Kinn like when he was younger?” Tawan asks Porsche out of nowhere and he’s sure his left eye is twitching. He’s stood with his back against the wall, his eyes on Kinn at the head of the table and Tawan to his right and in Porsche’s direct line of sight. He flicks his eyes up to the door behind them, silently praying for someone, anyone, at this point, to come in and save him from this melodrama. Still, he looks at Kinn, and he’s silently listening, his gaze trained on the plate but he knows when he’s eavesdropping. He’s about as subtle as his oldest brother, which is not at all.

“Short,” is what he says and Kinn looks up at him and Porsche rolls his eyes. “Look, my job is Khun Kinn’s safety. I didn't spend any more time with him than his other teachers who probably know him better than me.”

It’s true and not true. Kinn spent a lot of time on his studies, improving himself and becoming the man who can carry the weight of his father’s expectations, but with his tender heart, he needed that beaten out of him the most. Porsche had slammed him into the mats more than anyone else. Punished him more than anyone else. Refused to let Kinn become a princeling who looked the part but would die the moment he was on his own. Porsche made sure that Kinn would live, even if Porsche died.

Tawan gives him an inscrutable look. Porsche now knows he’s thirty-three, as old as Porsche was when things fell apart. He really should know better than to keep pushing on something that is either none of his business or he won’t like the outcome. He’s also now certain that Tawan knows that something happened between them and he’s fishing.

“Kinn isn’t the same little kid I met almost fifteen years ago,” Porsche continues, “You want to know what hasn’t changed? He’s tenacious, dedicated, and loyal.”

Porsche catches as Kinn swallows. Clearly, Porsche’s words are unexpected for him. For everything that has happened, Porsche won’t let anyone say that Kinn is anything less than what he is, which is a good person, even if he is a brat. He bows his head to Kinn and excuses himself because he isn’t here for getting into Kinn’s relationship drama.

He gets about three feet out of the door when Kinn calls from behind him, the door slamming shut, “Porsche.”

“I don’t know what your boyfriend’s problem is, but I’m trying to work.”

Kinn stands with his arms loose at his sides, almost a little lost to talk to Porsche, but it doesn’t stop Porsche going off: “Whatever his insecurity is, you need to deal with it, okay? Relationship 101.”

“You’re going to educate me on relationships?” Kinn bounces back, suddenly with something to sink his teeth into, “When the longest relationship you’ve had is with your right hand or my little black book?”

Porsche puts his hands on his hips and scoffs, “And that’s your issue, right there. Always with an answer and an attitude. Grow up, Kinn.”

“Better to confront it than to run like a coward,” Kinn says calmly and Porsche feels it like a stab.

He can’t help but walk back and get into Kinn’s face, “You don’t own me. If I say it’s done, it’s done. If I say it’s over, it’s over. Go back to your boyfriend.”

Kinn’s eyes flicker down to his lips as he speaks, “Because you’re the boss?”

The tension is palpable between them, thick and dense enough to cut your teeth on it.

“Because what we did was wrong,” Porsche sighs and steps back. “You refuse to see it, that’s fine, but I’m not going to be a part of it.”

“I lo—” Kinn starts and Porsche covers his mouth with his hand.

“You were twenty-three and I knew better,” Porsche corrects him. Kinn’s big hand wraps around Porsche’s wrist and pulls it down.

“Stop pretending like I’m some fragile child who lived a fairy tale existence. I killed a man when I was 16. My father didn’t clean up the body. You did.”

“And that’s how it should have stayed.”

Kinn lets out a breath, “No.”

Porsche shakes his head and Kinn doubles down on his wrist, holding it so tightly it hurts, his voice even and sure, “Maybe it was broken, maybe it would have failed, but we deserved a chance.”

Porsche tries to get out of Kinn’s grasp without hurting him, a bit of pressure in the right spot and he’ll let go, but Porsche doesn’t want to hurt him. He never wants to hurt Kinn. He pulls away as much as he can.

“You think that I wanted a body? A warm hole to fuck?” Kinn speaks in a low tone and Porsche feels it in his gut, low in his belly, making him squirm, “You can find those a dime a dozen. I wanted the person who saw me; too skinny, too kind, too merciful, and didn’t care. That was you. And the bit you hate, the reason why you pushed me away is because I saw you. I saw how you wanted to be loved, how lonely you were even in a room full of people who looked up to you. Your eyes are always scanning, always looking, but when I—”

Kinn yanks him back in, “When I was inside you, you closed your eyes. You trusted me when you trust no one. You trusted me because I’ve always been by your side.”

“Maybe I can’t make him happy,” Kinn laughs bitterly, “but I know I can make you happy.”

Porsche is shoved back and he stumbles as Kinn turns on his heel to go back into the dining room.

“Cowards don’t get happy endings in fairy tales, Porsche. The brave do. Maybe it’s you who needs to grow up.”

Kinn leaves him there, scraped out and raw, and unable to put back together the edges he just ripped. Porsche puts out a palm against the wall and silently screams and kicks the wall.

[blackcat2907]

Stars Shining Bright

Inspired by Day of Death (The Rookie Episode)

Content/Trigger Warnings: Torture, buried alive, trauma, Tawan

Tag List: @somnas-writes (let me know if you want to be tagged for my KP fics)

“Porsche! I found him!” 

“Come on. Breathe damn it!”

— — — 

Porsche knew something was wrong from the start. Tawan suddenly coming back from the dead and begging Kinn to stay at the Major Family’s home was too suspicious to be a random encounter. If Tawan was alive the whole time, why not come back sooner? Why now? Something was wrong, and Porsche was determined to figure it out. He bugged Tawan’s room, but that only made him fall into Tawan’s trap. Tawan convinced Kinn that Porsche was the mole and got him locked away. 

Now, Porsche was pacing his cell, glaring daggers at the guard. His heart hurt thinking Kinn believed Tawan over him. Did their relationship really mean nothing this whole time? Angry, bitter tears welled in his eyes. He clenched his fists. Did Kinn use him? Did he really believe Tawan? He swallowed back more tears, refusing to cry in front of the guard. Mek was his name, and he looked smug as he watched Porsche pace the cell. Porsche locked eyes with him and glowered. Porsche was innocent. He didn’t belong in this cell. 

Mek approached the cell, opening his mouth to taunt Porsche when a hand wrapped around his head and covered his mouth, muffling the startled scream. A knife embedded itself in Mek’s side. Deep enough to cause damage, but not deep enough to kill. Porsche’s eyes met Vegas’s dark eyes. The bodyguard inched backward as Vegas dropped Mek’s body and took the key. 

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to hurt you,” Vegas spoke softly, unlocking the cell. “We don’t have much time. Come on.” He extended his hand to lead Porsche to safety. 

Porsche’s eyes widened slightly. Those words struck him with deja vu, but it was all too fuzzy. He shook his head. “Why should I trust you?” he growled, slapping away Vegas’s hand. “How do I know you won’t use me to get to Kinn or anyone else?” 

Vegas’s eyes flashed dangerously. “I didn’t put you here, did I? Kinn did because he never trusted you. Kinn doesn’t trust anyone, not even Tawan.” He paused, smile growing. “But he obviously trusted that snake enough to lock you away. I’m offering you a chance to survive. Why waste it?” 

“I said before. I don’t trust you,” Porsche snarled, getting in Vegas’s face. “I trust Kinn. He has a plan.” Uncertainty filled Porsche’s eyes as if he was trying to convince himself Kinn had a plan and knew the truth. “I trust him…” 

“What if you are wrong and Kinn kills you for being the traitor you’re not? Who would look after Porschay?” Vegas knew he struck a nerve when Porsche violently flinched back. “From one older brother to another. I know we both would do anything to protect our younger siblings.” He held out his hand again. “So, Porsche, what will it be?” 

Porsche sucked in a sharp breath and mentally kicked himself for taking Vegas’s hand. “I’m not doing this for you. I am doing it for Chay,” he reminded Vegas.

“I know,” Vegas smirked, leading Porsche down the halls. A thrill of victory ran through his body. Everything was going according to plan. Now all he needed was Tawan and the mole to do their jobs correctly. Porsche got on the motorbike and Vegas drove them to Porsche’s house. “I”ll keep in touch. Let you know if anyone finds you,” he smirked. 

Porsche bit back a harsh retort and fought the urge to flip Vegas off. “Whatever,” he mumbled, practically running inside to find Chay. “Chay!” he called as he opened the door. “Chay! Where are you?” 

“Hia?” Chay asked, poking his head out from around the corner. “What are you doing here?” He put his books on the table and ran up to hug his older brother. “Are you okay?” he asked as Porsche tightly hugged him back. 

“I’m okay, nong. I’m okay.” Porsche gently cupped Chay’s face. “Are you okay?” Porsche’s anxiety kept creeping higher and higher. He couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was watching them. Chay’s safety was more important than his own safety. He’d risk everything to keep Chay safe. He ran his hand through Chay’s hair, trying to ground himself. 

“I’m fine, hia. What’s wrong?” Chay looked up at Porsche with wide eyes. “You’re acting strange.” 

“I’m okay, Chay. I’m okay. I just wanted to know if you were okay,” Porsche smiled wetly. “Promise me you won’t open the door for any stranger. Promise me you will be alert and stay safe. Please, promise me.” 

“Hia, you’re scaring me,” Chay whispered, hugging tightly. 

“Promise me!” Desperation seeped into Porsche’s voice. He didn’t trust Vegas or anyone not to come after his younger brother. 

“I…I promise,” Chay replied, soothingly. “Hia, I promise.” He buried his head in his brother’s chest. “Are you hungry?” He let go of Porsche and brought him to the couch. “I can make you something. Or heat up some left overs.” 

Porsche relaxed on the couch. “I’m okay. I need a shower.” He tiredly smiled at his brother, the events from the day catching up with him as exhaustion crashed over him. “I just need a minute to rest. It’s getting late. You should go to bed. You have school tomorrow.” 

“But you just got here!” Chay protested, gritting his teeth. “It’s not fair. Hia, can’t I stay up to help you?” He pleaded, giving Porsche his best puppy eyes. “Please?” 

Porsche chuckled and ruffled Chay’s hair, earning a slap and protests from Chay. “Here's the deal. You go get ready for bed. I’ll shower, and after that, I’ll cuddle you all night!” He grinned and tickled Chay’s side. Chay squealed and squirmed at Porsche’s relentless tickle attacks. “Okay!! Okay!! I agree!” Chay giggled, pulling away to rush off to bed. 

Porsche smiled at his brother’s antics and got up to shower. The almost too hot water soothed his aching body. The dirt from the cell washed away and he left the shower feeling refreshed and exhausted. He dried his body and started drying his hair as he went to Chay’s room to find his brother already asleep. “I knew you were tired,” Porsche smirked. “Hia always knows,” he whispered, kissing Chay’s forehead. “I’ll be right back, nong. Let me grab some water.” He petted Chay’s hair and strolled into the kitchen. 

“One move and I’ll kill you and then your brother.” Porsche froze as a gun clicked. He slowly turned around to see Tawan. 

“You–” 

“Shut up!” Tawan snapped, slamming the butt of the gun into Porsche’s jaw, watching with glee as he crashed to the floor. “You’re getting in my way so it’s time to erase you from the equation.” He squatted down, smirking at Porsche. “Do as I say and Porschay will survive this ordeal. My boss just wants you gone. And I want you dead.” 

Porsche wanted nothing more than to spit in Tawan’s face, but the fear of losing Chay stopped him. “What do you want?” he spat, eyes blazing with barely contained rage. “I’ll do anything, just don’t hurt Chay.” 

“I know you will,” Tawan grinned, standing up. “I’m going to enjoy this very, very much.” Porsche looked confused before Tawan brought his boot down on Porsche’s head, knocking the bodyguard unconscious. 

— — — 

Kim always suspected something was wrong. Being raised in a mafia family meant you were always alert or something bad would happen. Trouble always follows the mafia. At first, Kim was only interested in gaining information on Porsche, suspicious of the man after Korn hired him seemingly out of nowhere. But, he didn’t expect Porschay to be such a beacon of sunshine and joy. For once in his life, Kim found himself feeling guilty for using Chay to get information. For once, Kim found himself falling in love. So when he got a frantic call from Chay, he knew something was wrong. 

“Hey, calm down,” Kim spoke soothingly, jumping to his feet and grabbing his jacket. “I’m on my way. Tell me what happened.” 

“Hia is gone!” Chay sobbed, trying not to hyperventilate. Kim tensed up, a pit settling in his stomach. “He came home today and promised he’d cuddle with me tonight since we both were too tired to do anything else.” Chay’s voice cracked, his breathing shaky. “He…He said he’d take a shower and then he’d come to cuddle. But…” His lip quivered, and the fear in his voice sent shivers down Kim’s spine. Fear, desperation, and tears were evident. “He didn’t show up. I can’t find him. He’s gone. He’s gone, Kim!” 

Kim cursed under his breath. This was worse than he thought. “I’m almost there. Stay low and don’t let anyone but me inside, okay? Can you breathe for me?” 

“I don’t…I can’t…” Chay sobbed loudly. 

“Name five things you can see,” Kim said, driving his car faster than the speed limit. 

“The fl–floor, a pill–a pillow, the phone, blood, and…and broken glass,” Chay cried and Kim’s heart dropped. Blood was never a good sign. 

“Good job. Four things you can touch,” Kim praised. 

“The floor, the phone, the cold air, and the blankets,” Chay hiccuped, breathing slowing to a more normal rate. 

“Great. Three things you can hear.” 

“Your voice, the wind, and my breathing.” 

“Two things you can smell. I’m almost there.” 

“Iron and salt.” Kim grimaced at Chay’s answer. 

“Lastly, one thing you can taste. I’m right outside your door.” Kim gently opened the door and saw Chay cuddled on the floor by the kitchen counter. 

“Salty tears,” Chay cried, ending the call and looking at Kim. 

Kim’s heart broke even more at seeing Chay sitting next to a small blood splatter and broken glass. “Stay here. Let me look around, okay?” Chay nodded and Kim began to slowly walk around the house, looking for any signs of a break in. He found shoe prints and a syringe thrown in the trash. He grimaced and took the syringe, hoping to test its contents later. 

“Chay, I need you to do something for me,” he called to the younger male. “Gather enough clothes you will need for the time being. I’m taking you to my house. It’s not safe here.” He put the syringe in an evidence bag. 

Chay quivered, roughly rubbing his eyes. “I don’t care about my safety!” he snapped. “I want Hia to be safe!” He pushed himself to his feet, ignoring how the glass dug into the palms of his hands. 

“And Porsche would want you safe!” Kim snapped back, eyes cold. “I promise I will find Porsche, but safety comes first.” He stared at Chay’s bloodied hands. “I’ll grab the clothes. Sit down and let me bandage that.”

Chay bit his lip and sat at the table, palms up. Kim momentarily left and came back with a medkit. “This will sting a little,” he warned. Chay nodded, “Okay.” Kim wasn’t surprised to see Chay wince and not cry out as he got the glass out. After bandaging up the hand, Kim gathered Chay’s clothes and brought everything to his car. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a shadow move. He tensed up. 

“Get in the car. I forgot something inside,” Kim told Chay, turning heel and stalking back inside the house. His movements were slow and calculated, his hand gripping the switchblade in his pocket, ready to defend himself and Chay. 

— — — 

Porsche coughed as he woke up, eyes slowly peeling open. His head pounded and his body felt like jelly. Movement was sluggish and trapped. Metal clinked and Porsche lifted his head to see he was handcuffed to a table. A low light hung from the ceiling and the room was cold. His shirt was missing and black writing on his stomach made his blood run cold. Eyes widened as the dull pain in his stomach was revealed to be a tattoo. His skin, angry and red, burned with the black writing staring back at him. DOD: 9/13/22 

“You’re awake!” Tawan cooed, hand coming down to rub Porsche’s cheek in mock adoration. “I was getting a little worried that I gave you too high a dose.” He laughed, drawing his hand back before Porsche could bite him. “Even drugged you are feisty. Vegas was right about that.” 

“Wh…what?” Porsche whispered, eyes wide. Vegas betrayed him? Was Chay okay? He pulled at his restraints. “Let me go, you bastard! I’ll kill you if you lay one hand on Chay! Let me go!” His wrists became red and raw from the tugging, harsh metal digging into the tender flesh. 

“Awe, don’t be like that,” Tawan pouted. “I promised I wouldn’t touch Chay if you behaved. And you did. Now, how do you want to spend your last twenty-four hours?” Tawan stared cruelly at Porsche. “When you disappear, Kinn will be mine and I will finally stop hearing about you. It’s been ‘Porsche this’ and ‘Porsche that’. Well, with you gone, it will be back to me.” 

“You’re sick!” Porsche spat, struggling again. “Kinn won’t be your lover. He’s just keeping you close because he doesn’t trust you. Keep your friends close but your enemies closer.” Porsche’s head jerked to the side, pain erupting in his cheek as Tawan slapped him. 

“Shut your mouth!” Tawan screamed, face red with rage. “This is all your fault! If you weren’t here, Kinn would have loved me again!” He slapped Porsche again. “I was going to be nice, but I’ve changed my mind.” He stepped back and Porsche’s eyes followed every movement he made. “I’ll be back. I have preparations to make.” His cruel smile made despair pool in Porsche’s gut. “Don’t go away, my little Phoenix.” 

— — — 

Big never liked Porsche. Matter of fact, he hated the younger ever since he laid eyes on him. Porsche’s cocky attitude and the way he treated his job like a game pissed him off. Big worked hard and sacrificed everything for this job. Just for Porsche to flash a smile, save Kinn, and get everything handed to him on a silver platter. Then, why did he feel guilty dragging Porsche down to the cells? 

“Because you know he didn’t do it,” Ken spoke up, breaking Big from his thoughts. “Yeah, mate, you said that out loud.” He sat on the edge of the bed next to his friend. “I know you hate Tawan. You think he did it, don’t you?” 

Big rolled his eyes. “No shit, sherlock. Of course I do! Porsche may be an idiot, a cocky bastard, and a fool, but he is loyal,” Big groaned, rubbing his face. “He took this job for his brother. Of course he wouldn’t risk it all to be a mole. He may act dumb, but he’s not.” 

Ken snorted, shaking his head. “Is this Porsche support I am hearing? Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” He playfully elbowed Big’s side, trying to cheer him up. “It’s going to be okay. Kinn will figure this out and find the mole.” 

Big opened his mouth to respond when Chan burst through the door. “Porsche escaped,” he snapped and both bodyguards jumped to their feet. “The cameras caught Vegas breaking him out. Mek was attacked by Vegas and has disappeared.” He looked at them both with a stern gaze. “Kinn has ordered us to find him and bring him back.” 

“Sir, if I may,” Big spoke up. “What about Tawan?” 

Chan raised an eyebrow. “What about him?” 

Big and Ken shared a concerned look. “Don’t you think Tawan showing up now is a little suspicious? Porsche can’t have been the traitor. I think Tawan did something.” Big tried not to falter under Chan’s cold, steely gaze. 

“Tawan is not our priority right now. Porsche is,” Chan snapped, dismissing Big’s concern. Yet, both could see something different in Chan’s eyes. “Now, you two along with Arm and Pol will be searching for him. Pete has already been sent to Porsche’s house. You all will meet there and then spread out starting with Hum Bar and the street fighting rings. If anyone has seen Porsche, it would be someone there.” 

“Yes, sir,” Both bodyguards responded, Big sounding defeated. Chan stared at the two of them and left the room, shouting orders to the others. 

“Why the hell did Porsche go with Vegas?” Ken groaned, shaking his head. 

“I don’t–” Big’s head snapped to the side as he heard a ding coming from the phone Kim had gifted him. “Fuck,” he swore in English. Ken’s eyebrows raised. “Is that? How did you get?” 

“Kim,” Big replied, looking over the messages. He looked at Ken with wide eyes, heart pounding as his voice grew dark and grim. “And things just got much, much worse.” 

— — —

Vegas never wanted this to happen. Honest. He may enjoy seeing people writhe and scream in pain during his torture sessions, but that’s just it. When torturing someone, Vegas has all the control. He likes to see those bastards in pain. They deserve it. Porsche, he never deserved it. Porsche didn’t belong in the mafia world. He was too pure, too innocent. Yet, he stayed to protect his brother. Vegas knew what that was like. He’d do anything for Macau, even if it meant drugging Porsche or helping Tawan infiltrate the Major Family. 

Gun was not a good father. He was abusive and cruel. He would use Vegas as his personal punching bag, but when Vegas got too ‘boring’, Gun would go after Macau. Vegas came to realize that Gun hurting Macau was just as much a punishment to Vegas than to Macau. He hated his father, but where else could he go? The Major Family saw him as nothing but a monster and lesser than. Vegas hated Kinn because he was the perfect child. He got everything. He was the perfect heir while Vegas was constantly a screw-up and a failure. He hated Kinn with his entire being. So why did he want to help him save Porsche? 

The heir to the Minor Family found himself at the front door of the Major Family’s home. He sauntered inside, acting as if he owned the place. He called for a meeting with everyone. Vegas sat at the other end of the table, smirking at Korn, Kinn, Tankhun, and Chan.

“You don’t have much time,” Vegas warned, crossing his arms over his chest. His voice was grim and his eyes held muted concern.“Tawan is cruel. I made him that way. Well, Kinn did, too.” He smirked at Kinn, enjoying how he glared right back. “But that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is that Porsche doesn’t have long.” 

“What are you talking about?” Kinn snapped. “You broke Porsche out! You ruined everything. I knew Tawan was a traitor. I had a plan. Seems like you did too,” he accused, raising an eyebrow at Vegas, taunting him. 

Vegas bit his lip to keep from making a comment that would end up with him dead. He wasn’t stupid. “I simply gave him a chance at survival. It’s not my fault he took it,” he drawled, smile returning. “I dropped him off at his house. I didn’t expect Tawan to abduct him.” 

“Ah! I knew Tawan was a traitor!” Tankhun shouted. “And you all thought it was Porsche! My best friend would never!” He seemed proud of himself for knowing Tawan was the mole. His smile fell as a more serious look took over. “And now he’s been taken by Tawan. We need to get him back now!” 

Chan cleared his throat. “I have everyone looking at the bar, the underground fight rings, everywhere Porsche could have gone. I got an update from Big that Khun Kim suspected Porsche was kidnapped. With Tawan’s sudden disappearance, I sent out an update to make this a rescue mission.” 

“Without orders?” Vegas teased, raising an eyebrow. “I didn’t expect that from you, Mister Guard Dog.” Chan grit his teeth and stared down Vegas. “I don’t know where Tawan is. He double-crossed me to get to Porsche.” 

“Why would he want to go after Porsche? Why did you break him out?” Kinn asked, raising an eyebrow. “It sounds to me like you are starting to act out.” He leaned forward. “Tell me, Vegas.  Do you intend to try to overthrow us?” 

Vegas’s eyes flashed dangerously before he gave an innocent smile. “I have no idea why you would even suggest that, dear cousin of mine. Tawan wants to hurt you because you hurt him. Or, he wants Porsche gone because he thinks if Porsche is gone, you’ll love him again.” He barked out a laugh, throwing his head back. “You are just as much to blame as I am!”

Kinn jumped up, gun aimed at Vegas. “Shut your mouth! I suggest you remember who you are talking to,” he growled lowly. “You are lucky I don’t have you killed. I know you’ve been sharing information with the Italians.” Vegas tensed up, swallowing thickly. He shifted in his seat, glaring daggers at Kinn. “I should kill you right now, but I won’t because Porsche is my priority.” 

“Adorable,” Vegas rolled his eyes. “You’ve fallen in love.” He scoffed and tilted his head. “Go on. Ask me what I know. I know you are dying to. Come on, Khun Kinn, ask me,” he goaded, leaning forward, smirking as he stared down the barrel of the gun. 

Kinn’s lips curled into a sneer as he lowered the gun. “I won’t play your games, Vegas. Where is Tawan?” 

“I don’t know. He could have gone to any of the safe houses,” Vegas replied nonchalantly. “But he was obsessed with you. He’s too far gone. Maybe, he’s going to do something drastic and kill him somewhere you two have spent time together.” He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms behind his head. “It’s what I would do,” he grinned with all teeth. 

— — — 

Porsche grunted as he stumbled over more rocks. His arms were tied behind his back and Tawan had a gun trained on him. The dust mixed with the sharp rocks added to his quiet suffering. He recognized the area he was in, hopelessness growing in his gut. 

“It’s a shame it had to come to this,” Tawan sighed in mock sympathy. 

“You’re insane!” Porsche snarled. “Kinn doesn’t love you. He never will! You betrayed him.” 

“Shut up!” Tawan screamed, kicking Porsche’s knee, watching with glee as he fell onto the ground. Porsche grit his teeth as more rocks dug painfully into his cheek, chest, and legs. He glared up at Tawan and struggled to his feet again. He hissed as Tawan roughly gripped his hair, pulling him up. 

“You have two options,” Tawan snapped, dropping Porsche back down onto the ground, gesturing with the gun towards an oil drum. “You fight and I shoot you right here. Right now. Or,” Tawan cooed, “you get in the barrel and maybe someone will rescue you before you run out of oxygen.” 

“I’m not getting in there,” Porsche spat, squirming, trying to get away. 

“That’s what they all say,” Tawan sighed. “But they all always get in. Because,” he cocked the gun. “Out here, it’s certain death. In there,” he looked at the drum, “is a chance to survive.” Porsche gulped, eyes wide as his heart dropped. 

— — — 

Kim and Arm scoured the internet, files, and everything they could get their hands on concerning Tawan. Arm had pinged Tawan’s phone per request of Kinn when Tawan first arrived back at the compound. From the start, Kinn didn’t trust Tawan, but due to his decision to act like he did, Porsche is on death’s row. 

“Come on,” Arm murmured as he looked through post after post, file after file. It was late in the day of June thirteenth. He and the others had set up a base in Porsche’s home. Kinn had arrived with Vegas and Tankhun. Kim, Big, and Ken were going over a new conspiracy board. Chan had set up a perimeter and was interviewing anyone and everyone who knew Porsche or Tawan. Pol helped Pete with the weapons. Everyone was on high alert. 

“Can I help?” Chay asked quietly. Arm looked over at the younger boy. He looked so helpless as everyone else worked to find Porsche. Chay sat at the table. “I remember when Porsche went missing last time. Wasn’t he kidnapped and taken into the wilderness outside of Bangkok?” 

Arm paused and looked up from his laptop. “He was. The Yakuza targeted him per request from someone else.” A subtle glare was thrown at Vegas who innocently smiled back. “He and Kinn were missing for a few days. Why?” 

“Isn’t that when they officially decided to get together?” Chay hugged his knees. “Because after that Hia and P’Kinn started to act like a couple.” He managed a small smile. “It had been so long since I had seen Hia happy like that.” A solemn silence fell upon everyone. 

“I got something!” Ken shouted in english. “Tawan wants to hurt Porsche, right? He also wants to hurt Kinn from what Vegas told us.” He snapped his fingers. “And Mini Porsche just reminded us about the wilderness. It’s common knowledge around the compound and the families that Porsche and Khun Kinn were kidnapped.” 

“And you think Tawan wants to kill two birds with one stone,” Chan finished, looking proudly at Ken. “It would make sense. But that’s a lot of ground to cover.” 

Arm gasped and started typing something into his tracking algorithm. “I can narrow it down to a five mile radius, but that’s about it.” He pulled it up. “Tawan’s phone pinged two hours ago with this picture.” He showed it on the screen. “He sent it to Khun Kinn, but since you gave us your phone to help track him you never saw it.” 

“Those are the cliffs where I got shot,” Kinn recognized, hope rising in his chest. “We need to start the search. Start from the outskirts and work our way to where you found us.” Kinn grabbed his gun. “Let’s go.” 

“Finally, some action,” Vegas grinned, only for Kinn to snap, “You are staying here.”

“What!?” 

“Someone needs to watch Chay,” Kinn cheekily smirked. 

“Bitch,” Vegas swore in English, flipping off Kinn. 

“Let’s go!” Kinn snapped, glaring at Vegas. He rounded up everyone and they started the race against time. Arm rode in the car with Chan driving, Ken in the front seat with Big and Pol in the back with Arm. Kinn, Kim, and Tankhun rode in the same car with Kim driving. 

— — — 

Kinn should have seen this coming. He knew Tawan was up to something and yet he didn’t do anything fast enough to stop the fallout. Porsche was in danger because Kinn didn’t trust him enough with his plan. Sweat poured down his back as he shouted and called out for Porsche, searching through the rocky terrain. 

“This is my fault,” Kinn realized, glaring at the ground. “This never would have happened if you had had a better boss,” he told Big and Ken. 

“Don’t say that, Khun Kinn,” Big snapped. “Self-pity is not going to help Porsche. Get it together.” Both Ken and Kinn stared at Big in shock. Never had the bodyguard dared to speak up to his boss, especially in a disrespectful tone. 

Kinn swallowed and dipped his head. “You’re right. Thank you, Big. Come on.” He started his search again, shouting at the top of his lungs. The sun was beginning to set and each minute it set Kinn’s heart fell further. 

Just as Kinn was about to give up, he saw a glint of something shiny. He perked up and rushed over, falling to his knees. His fingers found the phoenix ring he had always worn. “Porsche!” he shouted, standing up and looking around, his heart plummeted when he stomped down and heard the sound of metal. “I found him!” he cried out, falling to his knees and digging with his hands. 

Soon everyone else had run over and helped digging, Chan and Kim brought shovels. Kinn didn’t take one, frantically digging. He didn’t care how his suit would be ruined by the dirt or the uncomfortable feeling of the dirt getting stuck beneath his nails. Porsche was the only thing on his mind. They cleared the dirt from the top of the oil drum and Chan pulled the top off. 

“Porsche!” Pete cried. “Help me get him out!” Kinn ordered, already reaching down for his boyfriend. The dead weight terrified him. Porsche was laid on the ground. “He’s not breathing!” Tankhun wailed. 

Kinn shucked off his jacket and started to perform chest compressions on Porsche. He didn’t care about bruising or breaking a rib. Porsche needed to survive. “Come on, Porsche. Breathe damn it. Breathe!” He got more and more desperate before Porsche coughed. “Porsche!” Kinn cried in relief, holding Porsche close. 

Heartbreaking wails that came from Porsche punched everyone in the gut. Porsche tried to hide in Kinn’s chest, sobs wracking his body. Kinn held him close, refusing to let go. He curled his body around Porsche, acting like a lifeline and safety net. They stayed like that for what felt like hours. Porsche cried until he had no tears left to cry. Kinn held Porsche close until Porsche passed out from the trauma, exhaustion, and dehydration. 

— — — 

Porsche woke up a day later, body sore and mouth parched. He groaned as he opened his eyes, a hand giving him a cup of water. Porsche was forced to drink slowly. He drifted in and out of consciousness. He would flinch whenever someone would touch him. When he was finally awake enough to talk to people, he saw Kinn, Chay, and Chan at the foot of his bed. Big and Ken sat on either side of the hospital bed. Porsche’s eyes widened comically when he realized the shoulder he thought he was leaning on was Kinn turned out to actually be Ken’s shoulder. He braced himself for teasing and torments that never came. 

“Are you okay?” Kinn asked quietly as Chay practically jumped into Porsche’s arms. 

“I don’t know,” Porsche whispered. “It was so dark and cramped…I couldn’t breathe.” 

“You have a few bruised ribs, a broken nose, and multiple bruises on your face, torso, and wrists probably from the bindings,” Chan explained in an uncharacteristically soft voice. “You…have a tatt–” 

“I know,” Porsche whispered brokenly. “I won’t get it removed for at least six to eight weeks.” A tear slipped down his cheek. “Is Tawan still out there?” 

“We don’t know where he is,” Big sighed in defeat. “He’s disappeared.” Porsche stiffened, eyes widened as his heart rate spiked. Big gripped Porsche’s hand. “There was a camera on the top of the drum recording you. It was live streamed somewhere else. Arm can’t find where. But we are still looking into it.” 

Porsche let out a broken sob. “I want to go home.” Chay started to cry and hug Porsche tighter. Soon enough, Kinn joined the hug, holding both in his arms. Ken, Big, and Chan let them have their moment. “Please, Kinn, can I go home?” Porsche pleaded, pressing his forehead against Kinn’s. 

“Of course. I’ll take you home,” Kinn promised, gently cupping Porsche’s face in his hands. “I won’t leave your side, love. I’ll stay with you until Tawan is caught and you feel safe enough to be alone.” 

“Promise me,” Porsche begged, pressing into the touch. 

“I promise,” Kinn vowed with a kiss. 

— — —

“Wakey wakey~” 

“No, please! Get away from me!” 

“I’m going to enjoy this.” 

[vcrses]

The Situationship - Post Credits Scene #11

[Read the fic here first.]

Tem stumbled out of the club on shaky legs. He pressed his hands over his mouth, cut off his breathing until he felt lightheaded.

How did you guys know? About me? Porsche had asked, weeks and weeks ago. It’s not like I ever liked any guys before Kinn.

Tem retched, tripping on his own two feet as he threw his weight against the wall, worried he’d fall sideways.

He remembered how he had felt then; how fucking small and pathetic and used he had felt as he sat there listening to the guy he had spent half his life being in love with belittle everything they’d share so easily. 

It’s fine, Tem had assured himself. I’m over him.

He had sat through months of Porsche preening over Kinn, of rediscovering himself for Kinn, of making an effort for Kinn - and he had done it with a smile. Because Tem was moving on, he was fucking moving on, and it didn’t bother him that Porsche’s first kiss was with Tem, but the one that he cherished, the one he remembered, was with Kinn. It was fine. All good.

Tem brought his shaking fingers to his lips, and he hated how low Porsche could make him feel about himself. Because the thing is, Tem would have let Porsche kiss him, just like he always did. He would have let Porsche do anything he wanted to do with him if he hadn’t-

Phi, Porsche had groaned into Tem’s neck, marking the spot with a bite.

Tem threw up on the sidewalk, and started crying. Sitting with his back against the wall, the hurt of the world piercing his gut, he dialled his boyfriend’s number.

“I-I,” he choked when his boyfriend’s sleepy voice came through the other line. “I fucked up, phi. I’m sorry. I fucked up, I cheated. I’m sorry.”

“Wait, what?”

Tem sobbed, hiding his face between his knees. “I’m sorry! I didn’t…I couldn’t…We should break up, we should-”

“Shh, Tem, honey, where are you?” Tay asked, sounding alarmed. “I’m sending Time to get you, okay sweetheart?”

[jiyongssi]

that time when kinn anakinn theerapanyakul had his first crush

the back door of the masserati slams shut behind a fuming second-in-line heir of the theerapanyakul family.

chan keeps his flinch perfectly contained by focusing his stare right ahead where other kids are bustling out of the school gate, bags too big for their little bodies, almost dragging them back and down

every single one of them prim and proper with tailored little suits and skirts exhibiting their wealth. except then he starts spotting a trickling of cheap cottons and broken thread bags and his brows furrow before he remembers the recent interdistrict event being organized for this whole week

behind him, his newly dismissed young master is quietly angry; tiny lips forced flat just as his glare burns the entrance of the school. if not for the heat of his stare, no one would know young master kinn is angry at all; product of years of careful training.

it breaks chan's heart honestly.

"someone's pissed," the youngest theerapanyakul states casually, not taking his eyes off the scribbling he's been busy with since he hopped into the car.

"mind your own business," anakinn bites out.

chan shifts the gear, steering into the road. part of him prays this journey will be calm but most of him has resigned for the oncoming turbulence.

just as he predicted -

"i am minding my business. you're my brother so you're my business." little kim shrugs too calmly for his age.

too cool, too collected, too... kim, chan notes with a soft sigh.

he tries to bury most of their banter as background noises but a certain word catches his attention and thenforth, chan eavesdrop, if not for curiosity, for intel then.

"didn't you learn in first grade to be nice to people if you want them to like you? or do they only teach that to smart kids like me?"

chan watches the hindmirror as anakinn's hand curls into a tiny fist. he was four years old when he last brawled like a normal child. at ten, anakinn is beyond shouting and retaliation. chan grieves for his twenty when even his emotions will probably be buried.

but that's not now because a ten years old kinn still blushes in his furiosity and admits albeit softly that he did give that 'brat' a present. even offered to show him around the school.

"oh ho ho!" kimhan giggles. his attention finally leaving that pink book of his. "so you got rejected then?"

"shut up!" kinn snaps. chan's so surprised he immediately looks towards the youngest expecting him to.. he doesn't know, do what kids do like cry perhaps.

but once again the theerapanyakul surprises him when kim simply cocks his head to left, regards his elder brother for a whole minute before simply returning to his book.

"what's his name."

he, chan notes. probably someone kinn admires and wants under his wing.

"not telling you"

"okay. which school then?"

kinn makes an annoyed sound, turning his whole body away and towards the window. chan's lip quivers in amusement.

young master kimhan is like a dog with a bone; "come on, i won't tell anyone. i don't even know who is it. we don't go to the same school. kinnnn...,"

and it's that last babyish drawl which gets him what he wants. something in chan settles with relief. kinn will be anything when he grows up but this part of him; that tenderness he reserves for his loved ones, chan doubts that will ever be robbed.

"porsche," kinn sighs, then immediately after, "do not tell pa. or ma. or anyone at all."

"what about tankhun?"

kinn hesitates before he says, "if he doesn't ask, don't tell. I'll tell him myself. If he asks," he nods mostly to himself.

"okay.. So which school?" kim prods, his precious pink book long abandoned for informations.

"i don't remember what school. but he's competing in taekwondo. he's very good. he never lost even one match. they say he'd been to bigger match like the whole of thailand or something."

"national level," kim nods knowingly.

for a second kinn pauses, scrutinizing his baby brother but continues with a shake to his head when kim pushes him to go on.

at the driver's seat, chan deliberately slows down the speed and keeps his ears sharp

anakinn tells about his approach and offer. how he waited till porsche finished his match before going over to give him a can of ovaltine he purchased from the cafe. he recounts how porsche looked him up and down and just brushed past him like kinn was a nobody. how half of the school saw that and how tay keeps teasing him about it and how he's pissed he has to go back to school tomorrow to face that all over again.

once the story's ended, with it bleeding out most of kinn's anger, young kim taps his chin thoughtfully and humms.

"i think you should have said, 'it will be my honour to show you around' rather than 'it will be your honour if i show you around'. i think he thought you were.. hmm.. what is that word that starts with p and has that omp sound to it, uncle chan?"

chan panics. albeit for a second, to be picked out like that. cunning little kimhan...

"pompous?" he offers as stoicly as he's been trained.

"yes!" kimhan cheers, "i learned that yesterday, it means like arrogant. thank you, uncle chan"

"i wasn't pom - whatever that is." kinn visibly seethes.

chan adjusts his collar, feeling tight around his neck

"no, but you sound like one if you go around telling people it would be their honour to be with you." kimhan tells him like he's reading a script. "maybe you could try again tomorrow."

kinn scoffs, but kim continues

"tell him you like to be friends. Don't use the word honour. It's confusing,"

Anakinn bristles, "What's so confusing about honour. We're ten years old. If he don't understand what honour means, he best not be my friend at all"

to chan's bewilderement, kimhan shakes his little head in the exact fashion his father does when confronted by his own brother and says, "oh kinn.. only god can save you now."

[luckydragon10]

I vote 4 and 5 for the ask game :3

Oh hi there! :D Thanks for playing.

4. What detail in [insert fic] are you really proud of?

OH shoot, ahh, you're not going to insert a fic for me? You're gonna make ME pick it? Meanie. 😭

Okay, before moving forward, I have to say...

SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER

Spoilers for my fic in the answers below.

This particular answer might be triggery for sad stuff, so there's that. Skip to the next answer if you need to.

I'm especially pleased with a thing I did in Heart on Fire: In this fic, we have Dragon!Kinn in his fully dragon form, and at the start of the fic I describe that his belly is overly stuffed and is hurting him. But I don't explain the reason for that right away.

Later on, I reveal that Kinn ate his whole dang hoard of gold, and it's been melted down in his stomach so that he can use the gold for decorating the burial mound he's carved into a mountain.

~~~

5. What do you wish someone would ask you about [insert fic]? Answer it now!

Which fic?! Aahhhh! I don't even know where to start. 😵 Okay, high level answer it is.

Problem is that I don't know what questions I want asked? Like, what I really want is to cause curiosity. If I can inspire someone to be curious about anything in my fics, I feel deeply satisfied about that.

I think a lot of times, reading fanfic is treated like a sort of... passive activity? That's not quite the right phrase, but kind of? Or maybe more like it's treated as all intake, a solo activity that's confined within the boundaries of the of the reader's mind as they consume it.

There's nothing wrong with that, mind you! If that's all a reader gets out of it, that's still great! I've brought someone entertainment, and that does my heart good.

But the next level to that is inspiration. The King's Tree inspired fanart and numerous questions about world building, and it inspired someone who is now a particularly beloved friend to initiate a direct message to me (cough, @daswarschonkaputt, cough). Shieldtail inspired people to look up information about nagas and snakes. The Ongoing Adventures of Ace!Kim inspired someone to ask honest and sincere questions about asexuality.

TLDR: The question I most want people to ask is the question I've inspired them to ask. I want to know that I made their brain burn to the point that they had to take action. 🤩

~~~

Thank you for asking!

Ask game question list

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Regarding the split!Kim AU I'm just gonna put my ramble of thoughts out on here.

1. Okay so what events led to Kim wanting to remove his younger self? What inner turmoil, self depreciating nonsense thoughts did he put himself through?

2. Where did Kim find this magic spell and how did he follow through with it without searching for it's consequences/side effects? Did he go down a black hole on the web and found the most reviewed witch/ spell out there to help him? Idk how to words more on this brainrot

3. How long was it till Kim hid what he did and how did young!Kim reach the compound??

4. What all young!Kim must be thinking and what did he do that everyone in the compound realized something was wrong? (Plus I hope Korn is dead in this, he doesn't deserve to be alive)

5. What was Chays reaction to young!Kim and how he takes care of him and spends time with him? (just being the most loving, and Kim feels so touched and full of unknown feelings because Chay?? the love of his life?? accepts and appreciates and treats young!Kim like he's the most precious in this entire world???)

6. Young!Kim's reaction to finding out about Wik? Is he shocked/ surprised/ wonderstruck? In complete awe of himself of the future?

7. How does Kim behave with young!Kim? Is he hesitant at first? But then he sees the way everyone else treats him and has Feelings™ and then thinks (a lot) and maybe something happens like some new stupidass bodyguard shouting at/ hurting young!Kim and Kim just snapping out on him, completely pissed off and in the worst rage he could ever have, completely protecting young!Kim like who tf you think you are?? How dare you??

Okay I think that's all for now, sorry for the spam of Randomness™😅

(yes i typed this up in my notes first so i don't accidentally lose anything.)

Anon darling I'm kissing you on the forehead, you're hitting so many of my story points with these asks! I feel Seen.

I haven't decided what Kim specifically does/feels that makes him want to do this in the first place. Since I started the fic where it's already happened, I just kinda. Handwaved it. But he does comment on the fact that Chay has been pushing him towards therapy, so that's probably part of it. Kim would rather lose all his memories than talk about his feelings. He's also 2 years into dating Chay (which honestly. That's bc I wanted baby Kim to be 13, and aging Kim up to 23 gave me an easy 10 years to work with. Tbh it would work better if Kim were only a few months into dating Chay and he was willing to do anything to Be A Good Person/Boyfriend/makeup for the breakup. BUT I DIGRESS!) Anyway being with Chay makes Kim want to be/feel better, and this is his nuclear solution. It does not work.

I also don't know how he did it! I... hesitate to write white pagan magic in KP fics. Maybe Kim pulled a Porsche and went to a monk for help dealing with his traumas, and ended up with a modified past life ritual that ended up splitting him right down the middle. The most important side effect is the way Kim feels about his brothers now; Tawan trauma happened when Kim was a little older, so the Kinn his child self remembers is still very loving and happy, he hasn't pulled away yet. But for adult Kim, who's memories start when he was a teenager... there was so much distance between him and his brothers, and then he moved out a couple years later, so he feels like they're practically strangers to him. Like really distant family that you only see at weddings and funerals. Meanwhile kid!Kim is a precocious little smol who's cuddling both of them whenever he can. (Khun loves it, Kinn has no idea what to do with it but he loves it too. Adult Kim is jealous but wouldn't know how to accept affection from them.)

It all happens pretty much the next day/couple days later, as of the current time line! Kim goes to the temple and does his thing. Kid!Kim manifests wherever he was when the memory split happens; so he just. Wakes up somewhere in the middle of Bangkok, and has to find his way back to the compound. Meanwhile KimChay are living in his condo, obliviously going about their lives. It takes a while for Kid!Kim to get home, then he's sneaking all around because things are different and he doesn't understand why (and he keeps stabbing people, but like. stabby the Roomba more than murder); Kinn has to find him/calm him down/get Porsche involved and figure out what's going on before anyone thinks to call Chay (who's been busy having sex with adult Kim lol)

Korn is dead! Bc I'm lazy and didn't want to think about all the terrible things he could do to mess with smol Kim! Like I said, Kim is kind of a feral cat just let loose in the compound, surrounded by people he doesn't know and freaking out a lot, until the guards finally get him cornered in his old room and notify Kinn. Then eventually Chay gets a call from Porsche, and he goes to the compound with adult Kim, and it's a whole Thing.

Chay absolutely adores kid!Kim. He's absolutely feral but he's also a cutie pie, and he gets a crush on Chay quick. Chay loves it; he was such a lovestruck kid with Kim, now it's his turn! (And he teases adult Kim soo much about how he like likes him >,<). Adult Kim is weird with his younger self at first, bc as far as he's concerned, this may as well be a random child. So Chay schlorps him up quick bc the poor kid needs love. And Kim does come to appreciate the way Chay takes care of his younger self (he has some very odd memories about it when they're eventually reunited.)

My goodness, young Kim is so excited. At that age, he had all these dreams about the life he wished he could have, but he never thought it would really happen. But he got away from his father, he gets to chase his dreams of making music, he has a (very cute!!) boy that loves him, that he gets to love in return. It's all his dreams come true. Again, Chay thinks this is adorable, that Kim was such a dreamy little kid. (Kim is also so excited when he finds out that!! Chay lets him write songs about him!! that's so cool!!! And Chay writes him songs too!?!?!)

Like I said, at the start kid Kim may as well be some random child, he's vaguely curious about what happened but has no personal investment (kid Kim might be. a little. heartbroken about that. He's very sensitive.) But overtime Kim warms up to him, learns how to love him and take care of him. It's seeing this as someone else, rather than himself, that allows him to "forgive" himself. It's easy to blame himself for all the bad parts of his life when he's not looking that poor kid in the eyes. And bc I think cuddles are important, and Kim definitely wasn't hugged enough as a child, there's many snugs. There are still Mafia Things going on around all this that Kim has to deal with, so kid Kim spends a lot of time with Chay and his brothers, but there are a lot of times where he's asleep between KimChay. He kind of is like their kid in some ways. It's an odd dynamic for Kim, especially when he gets those memories of being cuddled by himself and Chay?? But ultimately it's a good thing for him. (Except the Porsche memories. He doesn't want those 😤)

These were so much fun, thank you for sending them!! I love talking about this AU <3<3<3

[veliseraptor]

probably this is ill-advised for several reasons and I do feel like I just did it but you know what I feel like it. 150 words meme. usual rules apply: fics under the cut, send me up to three numbers and I'll write 150 words in the/each project you chose. twelve fics five fandoms aaand go

1. And then there was Vegas.

It was like a switch flipped. One day he’d had a baby cousin who might be a brat sometimes but Kinn still loved him, not as much as Khun or Kim but more than his uncle for sure. Sometimes he seemed like more friend than family.

The next he had a bristling tiger watching him simultaneously hungry and wary. (Tilted Axis)

2. “I asked you then, didn’t I?” Wei Wuxian said. Xue Yang did remember that. At the time it’d just been a question from the shameless young master with the interesting talismans. If it weren’t for what’d come later he would barely even have registered. He’d been busy watching Xiao Xingchen instead. 

“Seems like it must’ve been another boring question if I didn’t answer it,” Xue Yang said. 

“One you don’t want to answer, anyway,” Wei Wuxian said. “I have to say when you do that it makes me even more curious.You’ll admit to killing all those people without hesitating, but you don’t want to tell me anything else about it.”

Xue Yang scoffed. “Obviously I’m going to take credit for my work, Wei-qianbei.” 

Wei Wuxian hummed. “Wouldn’t be obvious to everyone,” he said. “I know you know something you’re not sharing about Chifeng-zun’s murder,” he went on, “and I can think of a lot of reasons you’re not talking about that.” 

Xue Yang widened his eyes in an expression of perfect innocence. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Wei-qianbei. What would this humble one know about the affairs of such an important person?” (demonic cultivator team up)

3. It was dark.

No, not just dark; it was nothing. There was nothing, he was adrift in a void, cold and empty. It was so cold, and he had never been so profoundly alone. But above all was the despair, the misery so thick he could choke on it. He’d done something awful. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want to exist, even this much, couldn’t bear it. He wanted to rip himself apart like a piece of paper; he already had and it wasn’t enough. 

Xiao Xingchen woke up crying with Xue Yang shaking him. “Xingchen,” he said. “Xingchen, hey, wake up–” 

For a moment Xiao Xingchen hung in limbo, bewildered and confused, somehow two places at once. Then reality and the weight of the nightmare came crashing down on him at once and he threw himself at Xue Yang without thinking, smashing his face into his shoulder, limbs slithering around him. (Redux)

4. He turned around and walked out. Half expecting to feel the keenly remembered pain of a bullet tearing through flesh. Or maybe he wouldn’t, if they went for the head. Nobody fired, though, and then Pete was behind him, between him and the guns again. He wasn’t supposed to do that and Vegas was going to have to try to make him understand that his life wasn’t worth any less than Vegas’s now. But he couldn’t really think about that, not when he had to focus all his energy on keeping moving, head up, stride steady, don’t scream, don’t scream, not here, don’t let them see how weak you are.

Thankfully, Pete stayed quiet. Vegas was pretty sure if he tried to open his own mouth to say anything he wouldn’t be able to control what came out.

He made it to the car. He got in the car. Pete said a few words to the driver that Vegas didn’t hear and got in on the other side, scooting over to be next to him even if it meant his legs were a little cramped. 

“Are you okay,” Pete said, voice level and calm, so fucking calm. This car was too small to hold everything inside him right now. He felt like a bomb about to go off. Three fatalities, no survivors, he thought wildly. “Vegas,” Pete said. “Can you look at me?” 

“Not now,” Vegas said, somehow managing to talk without the threads holding him together snapping. (post canon vegaspete long(er) fic)

5. Tuor said nothing. Idril turned away, dashing a hand across her face. 

“I don’t want to grieve for him,” she said, a mixture of anguish and anger. Tuor felt an odd pang in his chest and looked back over his shoulder. He thought of the hollowness he’d seen these past months. He’d tried again to make overtures, pity stirring his heart, but if Maeglin no longer seemed to hate him it was only because he no longer seemed to feel anything at all. 

It was doubtful Maeglin would thank him. But Idril didn’t want to grieve, and despite what he’d done Tuor’s pity was a stubborn thing.

“Go,” he said. “I’ll be right behind you.” (time for all the works and days of hands)

6. You’re fucked up, he thought, washing his hands. You’re so fucked up. Get it together.

The thing was, Pete had started to wonder if there was a together to get, or if this was just what he was like, now. No going back, no fixing it. Vegas had ruined him for good. 

Pete wondered if he knew that. Or maybe if, with Pete not right in front of him, he’d already forgotten about all of it, and it was just Pete who couldn’t stop circling around and around, trapped like an animal in a cage.

A hedgehog, maybe, he thought in the shower, and started laughing until his stomach hurt. (jiggety-jig)

7. Discussing a night hunt with Xue Yang was…strange. There was the unsurprising part: the continual need to remind him to consider the safety of other people.

(“Why?” he asked bluntly. “There’s no such thing as harmless innocents anyway, and these people are playing with something bloody and nasty.”

“We don’t know that all of them are involved or even aware,” Song Lan said. “Until proven otherwise, I will consider them all potentially in need of my protection.” Something ugly flashed briefly in Xue Yang’s eyes, but it was swiftly masked behind an edged grin.

“Seems stupid to me,” Xue Yang said, “but fine.”) (Walking Far From Home)

8. Song Lan gritted his teeth and forced out, *he’s not well.* What are you thinking, screamed his common sense again. Are you really going to make some kind of bargain with this creature, this demon, this dead thing–

He could almost hear in Xue Yang’s voice: dead things shouldn’t throw stones, Zichen. He could see Xue Yang breathing hard. He didn’t breathe now, or didn’t need to except by habit and the comfort of others. 

“What the fuck’s that mean,” Xue Yang said, but at least now he sounded more wary than furious. 

*I mean he’s–* Song Lan reined in his frustration. *He’s not well. He’s unhappy. He barely eats, he barely sleeps.*

Xue Yang stared at him in silence for long enough that Song Lan almost asked if he’d heard him. Then he said, “how the fuck did you mess this up again?” 

Song Lan jerked. Before he could object (can you object? You have failed him), Xue Yang ws speaking again. “I set up everything for you, Song-daozhang, I made sure he was alive again and I gave him back the stupid brat too, and you, made sure he’d see the important stuff fixed when he woke up. You just had to step up and be the fucking friend he thought you were, I figured maybe you’d’ve learned from your mistakes but I guess not!” 

*This isn’t my fault!* Song Lan said, anger rising at the sheer monstrous unfairness of that accusation. *You’re the one who wounded him so badly that he–*

“Shut up!” Xue Yang said, his voice rising to a scream. “Shut the fuck up, you don’t know anything, you don’t–” 

Wei Wuxian whistled two sharp notes and Xue Yang’s voice cut off like his vocal cords had been severed. (Life After Death)

9. But right now Sha Hualing was where she wasn’t supposed to be, deep in Cang Qiong Peak territory where Junshang…strongly discouraged demons from going. It wasn’t her fault that this was the only place she knew of this side of the Endless Abyss where you could find the Silver-Spinning Spider-Beetle, which happened to be an essential ingredient in a poison she was making to – it didn’t matter, it was important. Liu Mingyan seemed surprised, which suggested that she hadn’t actually been looking for her. Unfortunately, Sha Hualing was rapidly losing the advantage of that surprise by standing staring back at her like an idiot. 

“Saintess?” Liu Mingyan said, like she didn’t quite believe her eyes. Sha Hualing smiled. 

“Look who it is,” she said. “Mingyan-niangzi. What an honor.” 

Liu Mingyan’s eyes narrowed and she drew herself up to her full height – unfortunately a head and some over Sha Hualing’s own. She set her hand to the hilt of her sword. “You shouldn’t be here.” 

Sha Hualing batted her eyelashes, still smiling. “Why would you say that?” she said. “I’m just taking a walk in this beautiful place, enjoying the fresh air. Is that so wrong?” Her eyes darted around, scanning for what she could use if Liu Mingyan decided to attack her. And she would wait for Liu Mingyan to do it first, because then she could tell Junshang honestly that she’d just been defending herself, so maybe he should talk to his sect siblings about their behavior, how about that.

(Junshang’s relationship with Cang Qiong was peculiar and incomprehensible but he had been clear about the consequences of causing its members unprovoked harm.) (under pressure)

10. Wherever he was, it was dark, no light filtering through the black hood over his head. The cuffs holding his hands behind his back would be pickable if he had anything to do it with, but even if he could get out of those there was the hobbling on his ankles he’d have to deal with. The ground under him – no chair, that felt rude too – felt like concrete, which told him nothing.

They’d taken his shoes, which for some reason was bothering him more than anything else right now.

Fuck. Pete was probably losing his mind. 

He thought about calling out, but whoever was playing games was probably trying to get to him by leaving him on his own, isolated and disoriented. Sitting up was hard but felt worth the effort and the pain rather than being curled in a heap on the floor. 

If he was lucky, this was a dumb attempt at getting a ransom out of his family. Vegas doubted his uncle or Kinn would spend one baht coin on bringing him back; Kinn would probably at least be tempted to pay Vegas’s kidnappers to get rid of him. Or maybe they’d see it as an opportunity – let these people kill him and then take the excuse as a chance to cut down a potential threat. (All's Fair)

11. For the next couple days almost all of Vegas’s attention went to Pete. He knew he was fussing and he also couldn’t help it. Pete was mostly out of it enough not to get fidgety. Macau’s teasing was half-hearted, which said more than Vegas liked about how shaken up he was. 

Porsche came around to visit. Of course Porsche came around to visit. Vegas thought he was going to crack a molar when he opened the door. 

“Still mad, huh,” Porsche said, sounding more rueful than anything else. 

“Yes,” Vegas said. “You could say that. What do you want?” 

“Just checking on my friend,” Porsche said. “See how he’s doing, say hi–” 

“He’s fine,” Vegas said. “Resting. You can go.” (Undercut)

12. World reduced to four featureless walls and a door as formidable a barrier as the Theodosian Walls, Francis Crawford of Lymond sat, seemingly poised in still and focused contemplation, the impression spoiled only by the sheen of sweat on the back of his neck. Otherwise he showed no sign of weakness or faltering; when he eventually slept it was lightly. 

It might have been morning or afternoon - there was little light to tell by - when the gate opened. 

“Archangel Gabriel,” Lymond said. “Forgive me if I don’t rise at your coming.” 

“Pain makes you snide,” Gabriel said. “But I would rather you not strain yourself anyways, my dear.” There was a towel over his arm and he carried a bowl and a pitcher of water. “Are you hungry?” (et ipsi sunt jacula)

[ae-azile]

Progression Preview - Chapter 19

It is nice to spend time with Ma in a space that is hers. She seems more comfortable and outgoing, and she also has some semblance of control over her environment that Porsche simply hasn't witnessed until now. She even makes them Kai Jeow and cuts up fresh cucumbers, tomatoes, and cilantro to garnish it, something he hadn't expected her to do without someone assisting her. When Porsche had tried, she shooed him out of the kitchen. 

“This is really good, Ma,” Porsche tells her honestly as she watches them eat, “I remember…”

As Porsche trails off, he decides it's best not to say he remembers her making this when he was young. He doesn't know what kind of reaction that would invoke, or if it would invoke one at all. There have been times he tells Ma good, benign memories he has, hoping it might make her remember it too, only to get very little in response. 

“It's good,” Porsche just says again, “I think Kim would be impressed. Maybe one of us should go over and get him and Khun up since you made extra.” 

Ma shrugs at that, “I don't think he is there. He is probably with Chay, because Chay is not a cheater.” 

Ma has to spell the last sign because Porsche doesn't know it and Kinn is a little confused too. But once they understand, Porsche nods in agreement. 

“You're right. Chay would never cheat on Kim,” Porsche says, then grumbles, “I just want him to openly admit they are a thing. I got so close last night-” 

“He basically told you, Porsche,” Kinn says. 

“I want a clear admission!” Porsche says insistently as he leans into Kinn, “And that will lead to a brotherly heart to heart where we talk about the brothers we are madly in love with.” 

That gets a small smile out of Kinn. Good. He's been smiling so much less this last week, and Porsche doesn't know if Kinn even realizes it. Porsche definitely has. Kinn’s unguarded and unfiltered smile is his absolute best feature, and Kinn has so many great physical features. But when he smiles? It lights up a room. No, it lights up the whole compound. Porsche remembers the first time he saw him smile - his real smile, the one he lets himself show when he isn't trying to be a poised mafia boss. 

Well, he sort of remembers. It had been at Yok’s, back when Khun rented out the bar for the first time. He remembers being completely drawn in. His intrigue had already spiked when Kinn tried to pull him out of the way of that bullet, but his smile is what drew him in. Once he saw it again in the forest - after Porsche taught him how to spear a fish - he was a goner. Kinn’s eyes were bright with excitement and he looked so youthful and happy. That is his absolute favorite version of Kinn - the one who is so happy that he is grinning until his cheeks hurt. 

It's a version that had been coming back after Kim started getting better, and after Porsche’s arm started getting better too. But he hasn't really been around recently, and it's getting to a point where Porsche feels like he needs to sit down with Kinn, tell him his observations, and really talk with him. More specifically, get Kinn to talk to him about whatever is getting him like this. 

“There’s that smile,” Porsche whispers, lifting his hand to run his fingers through Kinn’s hair. Kinn glances at him, but doesn't say anything. He does, however, lean in slightly when Porsche puts his arm around him. That will have to be enough for now. 

“What are we doing today, Ma?” Porsche asks as he meets her eyes again. Ma stands up to pace, as if she is really thinking about it, then faces them again. 

“I want to make a cake,” Ma signs, “Maybe Kim can help me, but I want to decorate it myself. It can be a late lunch. We can play video games too. Chay wants me to play the Switch he got me. And then we can go out. Explore.”

Porsche smiles at that, “Okay. That sounds like a really nice day. I'm in. What about you, Kinn?” 

“I have a meeting at 11, but nothing besides that,” Kinn says, “It sounds like a good day.” 

Ma smiles at that, “I'm glad you will be free. I want everyone I can trust here for my cake. I am going to work really hard at it. It's important." 

“Ah, are you making one that's really fancy?” Porsche asks, smiling back at her. 

Ma nods, “I want layers and colorful icing. I will have someone get the things I need from the kitchen. I have something called YouTube on my television. I searched for ideas, and I know exactly what I want to do.” 

Once Ma makes her signs clear, Porsche raises his eyebrows at that, “You were searching cake tutorials up on YouTube?”

“And other things. It's very useful!” Ma signs, “But I do want Kim here. He is a good cook. He knows about food.” 

Porsche looks down at his phone, “It's 9:30 now. I’ll text the group what you would like to do.” 

Porsche: Morning! 👋🏾 Ma wants to make everyone a cake for a late lunch. 🙂 It sounds like we are basically eating dessert first, and then will go out for dinner together later if everyone is okay with that. She planned this herself, so the more people who can join, the better. Kim, she would like your help with making the cake if you are available. 

Arm: I am tending to some training overviews this morning with the guards, but should be done by 1. Is that okay?

Porsche: That should be fine! 

Khun: I’ll join! Cake for lunch sounds marvelous! 🎂🔪🍽️🍰🤤😋 Pol is with me right now, and he says he will join too! 

Porsche: 😁💙

Khun: I shall go prompt my sweet, innocent baby Kim! 🧑‍��👶🏻 So that he knows his assistance is being requested!

Khun:...Sweet, innocent baby Kim is not in his room. 🤔 Is sweet, innocent baby Chay in his?

Porsche: No. He's not. 🙄 I’ll give them fifteen minutes, then blow up their phones. They can't even get frustrated about it, since they are included in this group text. Timer starts now. 

Porsche keeps to his word. He gives both of them fifteen minutes before picking up his phone again. When he sees no response from either of them, he calls Chay. On the third ring, Chay answers. 

“Hello?” Chay says, sounding like he is half asleep. Porsche looks at the phone, then stands up and goes over to Chay’s suite door to open it. It's empty. 

“Where are you?” Porsche asks, his eyes narrowing. 

“I told you I was going to the gym,” Chay mumbles. 

“Yeah, you told me that almost four hours ago,” Porsche says pointedly, “And you still aren't back. On top of that, you sound like I woke you up from a dead sleep.” 

“I worked out,” Chay says, “I’m tired now.” 

Porsche narrows his eyes with suspicion, “Uh huh. Kim isn't in his suite either.” 

“Huh?” Chay murmurs, not sounding concerned at all, “I wonder where he ran off to?”

“Chay, who is it?” Porsche hears Kim’s fatigued voice say quietly. 

“He ran off to wherever you are because I just heard him,” Porsche says with a huff, “You're such a faker.” 

“We worked out together and went to my old suite to gather some things,” Chay says, “But we were exhausted, so we took a nap. Like I said, we worked out. So hard.”

Porsche opens his mouth, only to feel his mind freeze at the memory of telling Pete how hard Kinn punished him when the reality had been so different from that. 

“Chay,” Porsche says, feigning patience, “I am not dumb.” 

“I never said you were, Hia. Did someone tell you that? I want a name,” Chay says.

“Just…you…” Porsche gets out, lets out an exasperated groan, “Ma wants Kim’s help in making a cake. Check your texts. You didn't answer. That's why I called.” 

He hears Chay telling Kim to check his phone before Chay responds. 

“We’ll be there soon. Sorry for missing them. I had the alarm set for 10. And I wouldn't have left if you weren't there.” 

“I know that, but…” Porsche starts, then just decides to say it, “Chay, you don't have to lie. I realize you are an adult. I hate it, but I realize it. You don't have to tell me you were working out if that's not what you were doing, especially when I have given my approval of you and Kim very clearly.” 

“It wasn't a lie,” Chay says, sounding like he's stretching, “It really feels like I worked out.”

Porsche isn't going to touch that. Nope, he is not. He isn't even going to give Chay a reaction, because that is most likely what he is looking for. He's so good at getting them too. Porsche refuses to give him the satisfaction. 

“Wonderful. Glad you got your cardio in,” Porsche forces himself to say instead of some mixture of sputtering and screeching, “Please come back to your new suite with your boyfriend in tow. Make sure you look presentable.” 

“Okay,” Chay says, “Love you, Hia.” 

And while Porsche feels his heart grow at the sentiment, he does not miss Chay not even bothering to deny or deflect the boyfriend thing. 

“Love you too.” 

As soon as Porsche hangs up the phone, he looks at his own boyfriend. 

“They snuck out of their suites to have sex. Chay sounded exhausted, so they were up to some freaky shit. I know it.” 

“Hm,” is all Kinn says. 

“Maybe you should check in with Kim,” Porsche suggests, “Give him another sex talk if he needs one.” 

“If he exhausted Chay that much, I doubt he needs one.” 

“Ew, Kinn!” Porsche says, then tries to scrub the last seven minutes out of his brain. 

[having-conniptions]

KinnPorsche ep 14 Rewatch Rambles:

Last time seeing/hearing the intro 😭 but it's okay it's in my Favorites playlist on Deezer 😌

VegasPorsche friendship my beloved

"I definitely won't let anyone do anything to Pete" - "Just take care of him" 😭😭😭 VegasPete feat. PorschePete friendship

I love how Porsche's flashbacks come with dramatic wind in his hair

Apo's acting tho 😭❤️

KP thinking they're cousins for a hot second lmaooo 💀

Liar liar pants on fire (me @ Korn rn)

The brothers 😭❤️

The beginning of the end here we goooo

How can they all disrespect Kinn like that in his own home as if he's not still mafia even with his dad "dead"... not gonna say they had it coming but that definitely wasn't the smartest move

"Know your place" - "That's why I was speaking" POINTS TO DADDY CHAN SORRY VEGAS

Vegas immediately using one if his bodyguards as a human shield 💀

NOT CHAN 😭

Also can we talk about the fact that Vegas is still doing all of this just so maybe his father will be proud of him just this once 💀😭

Shit is going DOWN

Kinn also kinda used Pete as a shield but unlike Vegas he didn't grab him from behind and Pete actually kept his hand on Kinn the entire time making sure he's still behind him

Enter: Porsche

Whose first instinct is also to pull Kinn to his side and cover him 😭❤️

"I'm on your side" followed by their little tango of violence will always be in my heart

"Head, chest... or heart" *aims at Porsche* THIS EPISODE HAS SO MANY ICONIC LINES/MOMENTS

THE FUCKING TOY CAR OF DESTRUCTION 😂 and the marbles I can't hahahaha

Erika ftw

"I can be by myself" CHAY YOU'D HAVE BEEN KIDNAPPED AGAIN IF YOUR EX WASN'T LOOKING OUT FOR YOU

The face Kim pulls before dragging that guy's face across the bar is HILARIOUS

KIM CLEAN UP YOUR MESS

Not Erika 😭😭

Not Gun saying he doesn't care about profits WELL IF IT'S NOT THAT THEN IT'S POWER IS THAT ANY BETTER?

I remember being so confused about Korn's and Gun's versions of the story, not realizing there was wayyyy more to it

The VegasPete reunion 😭 Pete shooting Vegas in the arm so the bodyguards wouldn't shoot 😭 Vegas, broken and bloody, reaching for Pete's face, asking him to be the one to kill him

The kiss 😭😭 the way Vegas pushed Pete off of him and runs away, leaving Pete confused af

I didn't even notice that Pete wipes his mouth before getting up lmao

Porsche yelling "Hey! Stop!" as if that's ever worked xD

Suuuuure, in like 15 years she hasn't aged a day...

"You just want all the power" AND WHAT ABOUT YOU GUN

What was he gonna say WHAT WAS HE GONNA SAYYYYYYYYYY

They left so much open for a season 2 and then DIDN'T GIVE US A SEASON TWO

Please don't call Porsche your nephew he's dating your son

Also can we talk about how Vegas was never able to free himself from his father before Gun died? I really wanted Vegas to break free on his own 😭

PETE STILL HAS BLOOD ON HIS MOUTH. VEGAS' BLOOD. FROM THE KISS. I AM THIS 🤏 CLOSE TO GOING INSANE

And his little speech before he runs after Vegas 😭😭😭

Korn may be terrible but he will always be supportive of gay love <3

With his dad, Vegas lost all sense of purpose because all he ever did was to try to make his dad proud. So even after he died, Vegas wasn't immediately freed. Nah, he thought he had nothing left to live for. Where would he go, what would he do, if no one gave him any direction?

This entire scene... 😭 it hurts even more after seeing the bts where they just sat on the ground after filming, processing all the emotions 😭 and Pete's raw af sobs and screams that were muted in the episode are also in that bts

VEGAS' TEENY TINY LITTLE SMILE FOR A FRACTION OF A SECOND BEFORE HE GETS SHOT WILL NEVER NOT MAKE ME GO ABSOLUTELY INSANE

Porsche becoming head of the minor family means he'll still be under Korn's thumb

Omg Chay is adorable

And Kim is still miserable lol

Porsche in that green suit 🔥🔥🔥

The kissssss omggggg

Tay 😍🥰❤️

KIM'S VIDEO 😭 he's trying okay he's trying not to isolate himself 😭

I think there's still hope for them (post-canon, because again, no s2 unfortunately) because 1) Chay was playing the guitar again, meaning he picked up music again even though he'd stopped because of Kim, and I'm not sure which guitar it was but if it was the one Kim gave him u know what that means... and 2) he didn't delete the video - he almost did but then he put his phone away PLEASE I JUST WANT THEM TO START OVER AND I WANT KIM TO ACTUALLY BE A GOOD BOYFRIEND THIS TIME

Tankhun is still so iconic

"I have a surprise for you" - "then I'll go wait in the restroom" PORSCHE NOT THAT KIND OF SURPRISE LMAO

They're so adorable aaaaaa

Hahaha Kinn's trying to be sexy but ends up being a little cheesy and goofy 🤭

"How's Vegas doing?" HIT ME SO HARD THE FIRST TIME BC UP TO THAT POINT I WAS CONVINCED I'D BE STUCK WATCHING VEGASPETE FIX-ITS ALL NIGHT

"I call Pete everyday to encourage him" IS SO OVERLOOKED PORSCHE IS SUCH A GREAT FRIEND ❤️😭

The whispered "I love you" 😭😭❤️❤️

I feel like there are so many secrets left to be uncovered

Namphueng looks so uncomfortable and idk if it's because there's two dudes she doesn't remember hugging her and calling her mom or if it's because she's actually just pretending 👀👀👀

The post credit scene 😭 I find it hard to believe that it's also 1 month later bc Vegas' wounds would be wayyy further along the healing process. Especially the one on his arm that probably didn't actually go through but just grazed him. And after a month, Vegas wouldn't be asking Pete why he's still there. They would have had that conversation much sooner. So did they actually go back to right after the incident? Like, a few days later? A week maybe?

I will always be insane about "I can't run off to anywhere" I have made an entire post about Pete not being able to leave Vegas for various reasons so I won't go into too much detail but I'll just say this isn't just "I don't have anywhere to go" but also "I couldn't just run off and leave you behind"

AGAIN WITH THE SOFT HAND HOLDING 😭❤️

Hahaha Macau's little smirk he's so precious

The family cuddles and Vegas' soft little pecks for Pete and Macau 😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ also they used a mirror for that scene again and I'm still not sure what reflections mean in KP but I know they're a Thing™️

I can't believe it's over. That's it. I've rewatched the entire series less than two months after first watching it. It's not over yet, not for me. But I think my brain will at least stop being a "KP only" zone, at least for a while.

Aaaaaahhh this series and its characters and the cast will always be in my heart 😭❤️

[bitacrytic]

Overheat [24]

Read Previous Chapters Here

-

“Are you alright?” Tankhun asked.

“I’ll be fine.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

-

-

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

-

A quiet couple of days followed, with Pete enjoying his last days of solitude and rest, away from everyone else. Porsche video-called him every night. The first time, Tem, Time and Tay were in the background, asking Pete how he was doing, offering their pity and giving him empty gossip. The second day, when Porsche called, he was alone in their room, talking about everything, but skimming clear of Kinn. Like he wanted to mention Kinn. Like he wanted Pete to mention Kinn. But Pete knew about as much as Porsche did.

He hadn’t seen Kinn either.

“He’s fine,” Tankhun had said, when he showed up Sunday morning to help Pete back to camp.

“Why haven’t I heard from him?” Kinn would have wanted to see Pete off. Or at least, talk to him. Or text him. Or call him. But Pete had received neither.

“He called Papa before he disappeared.”

“Disappeared to where?” Pete asked.

“Who knows?” Tankhun shrugged, slowly urging Pete into the car as he protected Pete’s head. “Kinn does that sometimes. He gets in his head about something and just lists off to fucking nowhere for a few weeks.”

Which didn’t make sense. Kinn was adamant about being a part of “Overheat” and if he wanted to leave, he’d tell Pete. He’d give him a call or something.

“Don’t worry,” Tankhun said. “When Papa told me, I called Big. He’s fine. They’re fine. Kinn just likes to sulk.” As he entered the car, he fixed Pete with a serious stare. “Do you know why he would do that?”

“Do what?” Pete asked.

“Leave. I know my brother. He likes his space, but only when something happens. Last time, when he called me to come be with you, he sounded sad. But then the next day, he was okay again, like nothing happened.” Tankhun moved closer. “Is something going on that I should know about? Something that’s got my little brother fucked up like this?”

Pete kept his face neutral, trying not to give anything away. The truth was right there. It hadn’t been hard to put two and two together. Kinn had a sordid history with Awut that he would never want to replicate. But then he’d started fucking Porsche, who no one knew was an alpha. He’d been so caught up in Porsche that all his free time was being sucked into his personal time with Porsche. They were in a relationship, from everything Pete had seen in the hospital. If Kinn had found out that Porsche was an alpha, after the fact, that would explain his recent, flaky behavior.

But Pete couldn’t tell Tankhun that. It was Kinn’s business. Porsche’s business. Private stuff that Pete would hate to be revealed about himself if he were the one being discussed.

“Nothing,” Pete said, shaking his head. “He’s been fine, lately.”

Tankhun sighed and sat back.

“Something’s going on,” he said. “Maybe he didn’t tell you but Kinn’s going through it and I hate that he’s gone off to god-knows-where on his own. He does this shit. He won’t share until it’s too late and it’s breaking him apart.”

Pete could understand the sentiment.

“If they were blackmailing you for information, why the fuck didn’t you tell Kinn?” Vegas had asked. He was too ashamed to have been caught. He was sure he could do it, anyway. As blessed with the gift of foresight that he was, he’d never seen a future where he would care about Vegas. He’d thought he could handle it by himself.

And he’d ended up being so, so wrong.

***

Pete was met with a cheerful welcome, Monday morning. After his fellow cast members had hugged him and asked about his recovery, the director took Pete up to his room and asked him to strip. Tankhun was in the room, legs crossed as he pretended he was busy with his phone.

“My god,” the director exclaimed, frowning as his eyes traveled down the length of Pete’s body.

“The doctor assured me I’d be scar-free in a month.”

“Pete,” the director started to say.

“I have ointments. I’ll be fine.”

“How do you know that?”

“This isn’t the first time I’ve been wounded. I can handle it.”

This did nothing to reduce the director’s worry as he sat on his bed, shaking his head.

“Is this something we should worry about?”

“It’s fine.”

“It’s a possible scandal, Pete,” the director said. “Ohmovit doesn’t know about it because I told them you were sick but if there’s something we should be worried about-”

“It was a family matter. It’s been solved.”

“A lot of people have invested in this production. If one of our leads is in trouble, Ohmovit deserves to know.”

Pete looked at Tankhun, who was also frowning at Pete. He, unlike the director, was aware of the circumstances that led to Pete’s injuries. He wasn’t frowning out of worried curiosity. He was frowning because he was aware that the probability of problems arising was not zero.

“It will be alright, Sir,” Pete said, pulling his baggy joggers over his tights and reaching for his T-shirt. “I won’t wear revealing clothes for a while, but I’ll be good as new in no time.” He tried to smile. “Just don’t tell Ohmovit.”

As they left the director’s room, the man still had a frown on his face. Pete hadn’t managed to convince him that all was well. But he hoped the director was married enough to Pete’s work that he wouldn’t want to replace him. Whatever he’d been doing before, Pete would have to do more. He had to show the director that he was the best man to play Pawat.

“Are you alright?” Tankhun asked, strolling beside Pete.

“I’ll be fine.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

Well, Pete didn’t have an honest answer to give that would satisfy Tankhun. So he just shrugged, got into the elevator and punched for the rehearsal floor. He’d lost a whole week of practice because of his injuries. He had to get back to work. A lot was riding on this and he was going to do his best to make sure Ohmovit didn’t regret hiring him.

***

Slipping back into a routine was relatively easy. With the addition of a few new occurrences, everything was going smoothly. Wake up; go to the gym; go to rehearsal; eat; go back to rehearsal; train; take a bath; go to bed while pretending he couldn’t hear his roommate crying himself to sleep. Every night. Like clockwork.

Porsche had never asked about Kinn. Not once. Not that he needed to. Tay had asked. Time had asked. The director had asked. People had asked enough times that, at some point, Porsche must have gotten the gist of Kinn’s absence. But he didn’t ask, himself.

They had work to do. As long as Porsche was doing his part, as long as he focused when they were centerstage, as long as he spoke his lines with the correct affect, as long as he met Pete halfway, Pete was okay with whatever or whoever Porsche wanted to be when they weren’t working.

Unlocking the door to the room, Pete kicked off his shoes and pulled off his shirt as he walked in to find a black hard drive on his bed. It was the same one he'd given to Vegas. Which meant that Vegas had come into the room, dropped the drive and left, without saying a word to Pete.

Kneeling by his bed, Pete held the drive, like a favorite toy, imagining Vegas walking into the room, dropping the drive, and maybe, taking a moment to sit on Pete’s bed. In Pete’s mind, Vegas missed him, as much as Pete missed Vegas.

He’d been trying his best, so far. He’d put his energy into working and clearing his skin. He hadn’t allowed himself to think about Vegas because it hurt to remember how Vegas looked at him, how Vegas had wrenched his arm from Pete’s grasp like Pete was diseased and dangerous.

He couldn’t think of that. Reality was too cruel. Just once, if he was ever going to buy a fairytale, just to survive, Pete was choosing to spend his money on this moment, on believing that in some way, on some level, Vegas was thinking about him, too. Vegas was trying to focus on work, so he wouldn’t remember how good it was between them.

Because it was so good. Pete had never known pleasure like he knew, being with Vegas. The pleasure of looking in someone’s eyes and seeing himself, and loving what he saw, because what he saw was beautiful, was a medicine on its own.

Pete took his phone, opened Instagram and made a story of himself with the peace sign and his tongue out. That was Wan’s sign. Pete had no way to contact him since he always used new numbers. In the next twenty-four hours, Pete would receive a text and information on where to send the recordings.

He showered quickly, got ready for bed and loaded the new recordings into his laptop. He hadn’t heard Vegas’ voice in days. He wasn’t worthy of a call or a visit. But he had the recordings again. Going under the covers and cradling one of his pillows, Pete listened to the soft, clear voice of Vegas, as he went about his day.

When Porsche returned, he was careful about his movements. He always was, whenever Pete was already in bed. Even though he was a clumsy, loud runt, staggering tiredly around the room, Pete appreciated the effort. As he’d done, many nights before, Porsche took a bath and got into his own bed as he switched off the lights.

Pete was lucky to have the recordings, but Porsche didn’t even have that. Whatever had happened between him and Kinn, Porsche was alone and broken about it. Even as Pete listened to Vegas’ beautiful voice, he wanted to be held. He wanted to hold someone and share comfort. If it was that bad for him, he could only imagine how horrible it was for Porsche who had nothing.

Switching off the recording, Pete got out of bed, took one of his pillows and shuffled over to Porsche’s bed. He couldn't see but he could hear Porsche’s crying stop as he turned around in bed.

“What happened?” Porsche asked.

“Move over,” Pete said.

“Why?” Porsche asked, making room for Pete on the bed.

“I want to sleep.”

“You literally just got out of your bed.”

“Yeah, well, I want to cuddle.”

Porsche let out a short laugh as Pete adjusted himself under the covers.

“I don’t think this is what the intimacy director meant when he said ‘get into each other’s skin’.”

“Turn,” Pete said as Porsche backed Pete on the bed and Pete slid his hands around Porsche’s waist. “Sleep. We have work tomorrow.”

It wasn’t much. Every bit of Porsche’s body was intricately different from Vegas’ and Pete couldn’t help making silent comparisons. But this was better than nothing. Holding someone, falling asleep with the warmth of another person, was something Pete had grown used to, ever since he started dallying with Vegas.

Even if it wasn’t perfect, but it was… something. Pete could not believe it, but he found himself, for the first time in a while, realizing that he, just like everyone else, was also in need of some little bit of comfort.

[warandpussy]

Okay, okay... Below the clavicle was soo interesting! I am looking forward to comments on this fic because I need meta on Porsche's and Kinn's thoughts and I have many feelings about things, but I am unlikely to be able to write them. Hopefully someone better with words will write them.

What I can tell though is that I loved that you included the fact that Porsche thought Kinn give him permission to drink the water. It’s one of the most hurtful things about Ep5 for me actually; that Porsche asked for permission to drink and thought Kinn okayed it but then Kinn said ‘I’am the one giving you the punishment’ and it made the punishment doubly unfair in Porsche’s eyes. And while reading your fic when Porsche says ‘You drugged me’ I thought he was talking about this time and he was just confused. But then saying Vegas may have been the one wearing white, but Kinn told him to drink!!! He was talking about the first time he was drugged?!

Then Kinn saying are you punishing me…!!

I loved it, thank you for sharing it. <3

hi anonnnn sorry it took me like 7 years to reply to this... i saw it when you sent it and i was like, i need to answer that but then i fell asleep and in the morning i didn't remember. (my brain is broken).

anyway.. i think the the thing that appeals to me about k/p as a ship and kp the show is that these people really do hurt each other quite a lot, don't they? like it's a steady push and pull of hurting each other and then forgiving each other. like obviously at the beginning we have kinn strangling porsche as punishment, and then fucking him when he's drugged, and then punishing him for allowing himself to be drugged. but porsche hurts kinn as well i think, more and more towards the end of the show. he leaves him for vegas in episode 13 and pretty explicity says it's because he doesn't trust him/his family.

anyway i find this sort of thing very compelling personally, because i just think it's very realistic. i think in real life relationships (not just romantic) people very much do hurt each other all the time, and fiction that's willing to thread that line of like, what is forgiveable and what isn't? it is like catnip to me. i find it so potent.

putting the rest of this under a cut because oh my god i cannot shut up

soooo in this fic i wanted to explore this a bit. like, other people with huge brains pointed out in various metas that, from porsche's perspective, it seemed like kinn was the one who drugged the water at the diamond auction. he nods at him and smiles at him just after the waiter passes it to him. and then later goes up to the hotel room and fucks him. and i reckon if that was it, if that was what had happened, porsche could have probably rationalised it - but he got punished for drinking the water the next day, for being 'careless', and it's like - but you told me to do that! you did that, that was you. i think that would be the most hurtful thing. and the 'figure in white speaking english at him while groping him' would be a confusing factor, but everything else fits into the narrative of 'kinn did it', and he seems to acknowledge it in the woods, so that's it end of story. porsche forgives him, and they can move on.

so then he finds the drugs in vegas's rooms and the narrative changes, and like genuinely i think that would feel so violating. because if it was kinn, the guy he loves, hurting him - that's already been forgiven. but instead he was sexually assaulted by someone else entirely - someone he knows, and even likes (I think anyway). and that feeling of violation is SO terrible, especially when it happened a long time ago and you can't even do anything about it anymore. like the context of all of it has changed - vegas is already taken down, already vanquished. he's already had all his power and his influence taken away from him. so all porsche can do is feel miserable about it.

and i said this in a reply to someone's comment but here i go again - sometimes i think when you're miserable you become like, selfish? (i hope that's not just a me thing). but like, all you can think about is how miserable you are, and how much you wish you didn’t feel like that any more. so he’s gone like, if I can erase the past from my mind with this new experience, if I do it to myself, I won’t be miserable anymore - without thinking about whether this would hurt kinn instead (oh boy).

someone left a comment that sums it up better than i could:

For a very weird reason i get what Porsche is doing and why:He is reclaiming his pain, his control, his memory. Replacing the bad thing that wont go away-being drugged then being felt up against his will, being helpless then Kinn taking him-also kind of losing the control he should have kept in this situation- then Porsches moment of realising all that the next morning. And what he does is being in control this time around by handing it over on his own conditions. The drugs taken willingly knowing what they would make him feel like. Being fucked because he wanted it, by someone he loves to be helpless for. The memory later being maybe the similarly fuzzy but the feeling after one of choice and trust(?).

and like... yeah... taking back control by choosing how and when to make yourself helpless. but hurting kinn in the process.

love u babygirl you're doing GREAT ♥♥♥♥♥♥

[yilingbee]

since apparently my mind can't shut up about it but i need a scene where we see kinn teaching porsche how it is to be with a man intimately, like this is the first time he's ever been with a man sexually and tbh porsche doesn't strike me as a guy that knows that much about how gay sex works, so he's entirely clueless when he begins his relationship with kinn and only has his experience with women to guide him (which isn't much help)

and i need to see that clumsiness and inexperience reflected in their relationship (like you're telling me porsche gave a perfect blowjob in that helicopter??? nah, i don't buy it, they've been together too short of a time for that to be believable)

like i need a scene where kinn has to guide him and tell him what to do next, have that vulnerability shown, and look it doesn't have to be in the middle of sex, they can just talk about it, maybe kinn brings up the posibility of bottoming and they talk how that would work, what kinn likes and what porsche would do in that position to take care of him, i just need something