“Angel, will you bring me my phone?” Kim called from the balcony. He heard it chime in the living room, but was too comfortable with his guitar to get it himself. Chay was closer, anyway.
“Sure,” Chay called back. He unburied himself from the piles of notes, books, and homework he’s been accumulating all afternoon, and located Kim’s phone amidst the mess he’s made of the coffee table. Kim had message previews disabled but Chay saw the sender’s ID. “It’s Kinn.”
“Thanks.” Chay drifted back towards his homework, but not before Kim gave him a sweet kiss on his hip and an encouraging pat to his butt. Kim watched him go, full of so much fondness and love for the other boy, he somehow wondered how he could survive the weight of it.
Then Kim opened his messages, and all the warmth left his body in the same rush that stole the breath from his lungs.
From: Kinn
It’s time to come home Pa is dying
Kim called his brother. Kinn picked up before the end of the first ring.
“What happened?” Kim asked, distantly proud of himself for keeping his voice even.
“Pa has cancer. Stage four, according to the doctor. Started in his liver, spread to his lungs. They’re suspecting his brain, as well.”
“What? How—since when?”
“Nearly two years now.” Kinn took a deep breath, He kept his voice steady, too, even though this had to be destroying him. “He was hiding it from us. Said he didn’t want us to worry.”
“Bullshit.”
“I believe him, Kim. He wouldn’t—he wouldn’t want to look weak. It’s why he retired to Chiang Mai. You know how he is.”
Another wave of cold. “I didn’t know he retired,” Kim said flatly.
“Oh.” A beat. “He did. Four years ago, now. Soon after…”
“After I left.” All this time, hating his father for never coming to see him. The entire time he was on the other side of the country, and no one bothered to tell Kim. Of course they hadn’t, he’d made it very clear when he stormed out that he didn’t want contact with any of them. “What… what do we do, now?”
“Tankhun has already moved up North to take care of Pa. I’m taking a sabbatical from the company to join him. I—we would appreciate it if you could come too.”
Kim felt his throat close up around any words he might have said.
“Not for long. Only a few days, at most. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t serious, Kim, but we don’t know how much time he has left. Please, I… Please.”
Kim hated the desperation in his brother’s voice. Would do anything to spare them both.
“No, I—I’ll come.” Kinn breathed a deep sigh of relief. Before he could do anything like thank Kim, he rushed to add, “I can’t promise how long I’ll stay. I’ll need to see how much—”
“Just a few days. Anything you can spare.”
“Okay. Okay, I… I’ll be there.”
“Thank you, Kim. I’ll let Tankhun know. Tell me when you have your travel details.”
“I will.” Feeling eyes on his back, Kim looked over his shoulder to find Chay hovering in the doorway, watching him with concern. “I have to go. We’ll talk soon.”
“Is everything alright, P’Kim?” Chay asked softly, after Kim hung up. He approached quietly, Kim turned back around, staring out at the cityscape beyond the balcony. He still had his phone in hand.
“My father’s dying,” Kim said numbly.
“Oh, no.” Immediately Chay’s arms fell around him, pulling him into the safety of his boyfriend’s chest. “I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”
“I… don’t know.” Kim didn’t know what he was feeling, if anything at all. “I shouldn’t be. He’s my father. And he’s—”
“I don’t think there’s a right way to feel,” Chay soothed, working his fingers through Kim’s hair. “But I think it’s also probably still a shock? Why don’t we go sit down? I think we’ve both worked enough today, let’s just—yeah. Sit down. Let it, uh, sink in.”
“Okay.”
Kim let Chay take his guitar and lay it aside. He let himself be led back into the living room, which had unofficially become Chay’s workspace during these shared days. He watched Chay clear away his school clutter into an unorganized pile—he would probably regret it later—and then let himself be pulled down onto the sofa, into Chay’s chest.
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one of the reasons it's really hard for a lot of intersex people when intersex topics are on the news cycle is because the public's reaction reveals how little anyone knows or cares about intersex people, including people who call themselves our allies. almost every time intersex topics are trending, the discourse surrounding them is filled with misinformation. people who only learned today what the word intersex means jump into conversations and act like an authority. endosex/dyadic/perisex people get tripped up over things that are basically intersex 101, with tons of endosex people incorrectly arguing about the definition of intersex, who "counts," DSD terminology, and so much more. i've seen multiple endosex people say today that they've been "warning intersex people" and that we should have known that transphobia would catch up with us eventually, which is an absolutely absurd thing to say given the fact that consistently over the past ten years, it has often been intersex people sounding the alarm on sex-testing policies and also the fact that many, many intersex people are also trans, and already are facing the impacts of transphobia. there is an absolute failure from the general public to take intersex identity seriously; people seem not even able to fathom that intersex people have a community, history, and our own political resources. instead, endosex people somehow seem to think they're helping by bringing up half-remembered information from their high school biology class which usually isn't even relevant at all.
and this frustrates me so fucking much. not because i want to deny the impacts of transphobic oppression--i'm a trans intersex person, trust me when i say i am intimately aware of transphobia. this frustrates me because there is no way we can achieve collective liberation if our "allies" fail to even engage with basic intersex topics and are seemingly unaware of the many forms of intersex oppression that we are already facing every fucking day. if you are not aware of compulsory dyadism, if you are not aware of interphobia, if you are not aware of the many different ways that intersex people are directly and often violently targeted--how the fuck do you think we're going to dismantle all of these systems of oppression?
if you were truly an intersex ally, you would already KNOW that this is not new, and would not be surprised--interphobia in sports has been going on for decades. you would know that we do have a community, an identity, a history--you would have already read/listened/watched to intersex resources that give you the background information you need for allyship. you would know that although there is a really distinct lack of resources and political education, that intersex people ARE developing a political understanding of ourselves and our oppression--Cripping Intersex by Celeste Orr and their framework of compulsory dyadism is one example of how we're theorizing our oppression. It's absolutely fucking wild to me how few people I've seen actually use words like "interphobia" "intersexism" "compulsory dyadism" or "intersex oppression"--endosex people are seemingly incapable of recognizing that there is already an entrenched system of oppression towards intersex people that violently reshapes our bodies, restricts our autonomy, and attempts to eradicate intersex through a variety of medical and legal means.
you cannot treat intersex people like an afterthought. not just because we're meaningful parts of your community and deserving of solidarity, but also because intersex oppression impacts everyone!!! especially trans community--trans people will not be free until intersex people are free, so much of transphobia is shaped by compulsory dyadism, the mythical sex binary, all these ideas of enforced "biological sex" that are just as fake as the gender binary.
it makes me absolutely fucking livid every time this shit happens because it becomes so abundantly clear to me how little the average endosex person knows about intersex issues and also how little the average endosex person cares about changing that. i don't know what to say to get you to care, to get you to change that, but we fucking need it to happen and i, personally, am tired of constantly being grateful when i meet an endosex person who knows the bare minimum. i think we have a right to expect better and to demand that if you're going to call yourself our ally, you actually fucking listen to us when we tell you what that means.
okay for endosex people to reblog.
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