#and my explanations were made to her understanding level

[just-an-enby-lemon]

Came out as aroace to my mum sartuday. Weirdest conversation of my life. Her first reaction was of course "so I won't have grandchildren" but that's not the fun part.

So after an akward conversation about kids (I do want to adopt childrem but I think it would be equaly great if I didn't want childrem - a trait that has nothing to do with being aroace and a lot to do with your opinion on having kids - and it should be no one's bussiness except the people who having or not having kids). And the very cool revelation my mom does have an aro friend. We got this:

"You are hermafrodite then?"

"No? Hermafrodite is an outdated and offensive way to say interesex, mom." I said fully beliving my mother knew what intersex meant.

"Oh, sorry, so you are intersex!"

"No?? Intersex people are people who are born with primary and/or secundary charactheristics of both sexes."

"Just like you." Me remembering I did try to come out as non-binary to my mother and she ignored it.

"No..." Too tired and confused to explain that sex and gender are different things " I mean physical charactheristics, like having both genitals for example."

"Oh okay, so you are ... what's the word... an a- angel."

"An angel?"

"Yes, don't people say angels have no sex."

"Mom, I don't think that's the type of sex they are refering to?" Again I came out as aroace not non-binary and even if so I'm not agender. If something I have too much gender.

"But they also don't. You are an angel. That's how I see it."

"Okay?"

And that was the very weird conversation we had.

[gaypirate420]

Little sound // Jasper W. Hale

Jasper Whitlock Hale x male!reader.

Summary: You question vampiric sleep while Jasper makes a little sound.

A/N: Breaking Dawn Jasper deserves more love, me thinks.

Angst/Fluff.

"Which pillow do you want?" You asked him while you made space for him on your bed, Jasper pointed to your thighs.

"These ones, please." He spoke with a smirk, you chuckled and take off the blanket that lay over your legs.

The blonde vampire smiled and he went down, placing kisses on your thighs before he opened them gently and lie down his head on your stomach.

Jasper seemed tired, mentally at least. You're not sure if vampires get sore muscles or something like that but he needed to lie down and relax, it was evident from a mile away.

The vampire sighed heavily, his cold breath hitting you, his hands quickly got to caress your warm skin.

"I missed you." You spoke softly as your hand got to his recently cut hair.

"I know, I'm sorry, been busy with— Bella." Jasper scoffed.

Tired, he was so incredibly tired, done even, done with everything and it made you sad because it was something out of your human control and comprehension.

"What's with her?" You asked curious about his reaction, it was very out of character from his part.

"She got turned, darlin'— she just— has this crazy control over her newborn instincts. It's impressive— but-" He said bitter, almost angry, not angry no, jealous.

"But— Am I not trying hard enough? Or I'm just unfixable?" Jasper asked softly, very softly almost like he didn't meant to say that, his tongue betrayed him completely and revealed his thoughts.

"I think you're trying hard— the hardest you can— you have come a long way, Jasper. I'm proud of you." You spoke serious. The vampire stayed silent while his finger stroke your skin.

You stroke his hair, you felt how his body got weak in an instant and a sigh left his lips.

"I missed you so much, my darlin'." He whispered and his cold lips kissed your thigh, you giggled at the sensation but he continued.

Despite the fact that he's been talking to you everyday and bringing you flowers every weekend, it didn't felt like that because he hasn't had the opportunity to stay.

To be with his darling, his most special boy.

You looked down at him, his golden eyes looked up, you bopped his nose and he chuckled.

"Pretty." You whispered and bopped his cheek, Jasper smirked, his cold hand went up.

"Handsome." He whispered back and bopped your cheek, you mimicked his smirk and lean down to kiss his forehead.

Your fingers returned to stroke his hair, he took deep breaths, useless for his body but at least the illusion seem to help.

Jasper closed his eyes, letting his mind relax, melting comfortably under your touch and resting on your soft thighs.

You stayed silent, playing with his hair and caressing his pale face from time to time.

Vampires can't sleep, at least that's what Jasper told you but you have a theory that maybe they enter a deep meditating state.

Because there's no explanation for the level of calmness Jasper seems to be in when you cuddle with him. He's sleeping in your mind, resting along side with you.

The vampire sometimes even moves like one would do when asleep, losing or tightening his grip on you, mumbling things and everything. It was fascinating and comforting knowing he felt so much peace with you.

——————————————————————

One of your hands was busy stroking his hair while the other scrolled through your phone.

It's been probably an hour or two, you looked down at Jasper, you smiled softly at the image that lied infront of you.

He's asleep, call yourself stubborn because nothing could convince you otherwise, probably when you become a vampire yourself you'll understand, but right now, he's sleeping, completely asleep.

There's just no way that the man laying between your thighs is wide awake.

You stopped everything you were doing when you noticed a sound. A small and soft sound.

It's coming from Jasper.

You smiled and put attention to the small noise. He's snoring? It was a soft rumbling and it stopped the moment your hand didn't stroke his hair.

So you moved your fingers again, and he made that sound, your fingers moved down to his neck and it became louder. You got closer.

He's purring.

He's done this before, but you thought you were making it up.

You stayed silent, shooked, enjoying this moment, and discreetly recording it with your phone, the purr was very soft, you don't think Jasper is even aware his body is having this reaction.

You could feel the soft vibrations of his chest as he did this soft purring sound.

You kissed his forehead, whispering sweet nothings before you grabbed a blanket and throw it over him, Jasper just snuggled further on your thighs.

He then spoke, and his words were drowsy, sleepy mumbling.

"I love you." The vampire spoke softly, you kept stroking his hair and he kept making that soft purring.

"I love you too, cowboy." You whispered back with a smile on your face.

"I- have things to do, darlin'." He whispered when he noticed the blanket, he opened his eyes but close them again almost immediately.

You suppressed your comment about him not allowing himself to rest and have a nice moment.

"Shhhh, you have centuries left to do whatever you want. Just rest now. Sleep, it's okay." You spoke softly, Jasper shaked his head but didn't move an inch.

"Vampires can't sleep, doll." He protested with a slight slurry voice, you chuckled and rolled your eyes playfully.

"Sure thing, Jazz." You said, he placed a kiss on your thigh before he returned to continue his 'no sleep'.

--------------------------------------------------

A/N: heyyyyy how y'all doing? Hope you liked this!

[nyuuronfly]

On Rain World lore and it's implementation within the game.

This is kindof a random ramble I went on in a Discord chat and just feel like sharing elsewhere. (also note this is all primarily in reference to the original game, Survivor's story.)

I honestly think too many miss the forest for the trees a bit with RW, in terms of how important the lore is, if that makes sense. I talked with somebody about first-time experiences with the game and they said they'd watched a number of lore explanation videos on YT before starting, because of some reason along the lines of "I didn't trust the game to deliver its own story properly." To me this is almost saddening to hear because I really feel that misses the point of why the game has it's lore to begin with.

To me, while playing, any tidbits i learned about history or other information contributed to a feeling like the world I was navigating had a very real history that saturated it, yet one that I would be unable to grasp fully. It is an illusory feeling of realness, given how it is experienced. The game is mechanically not designed to incentivize collecting many information pearls, especially when in the original game you can literally just drop them off a cliff and lose them forever. You get the feeling often like you are bound to never be able to get everything, nor would you even probably want to put in the effort, so the illusion actually stays stronger because of that. Your mind wanders speculating about every little detail, whether intention truly existed behind it or not, because it feels like it did. You learned that it might have. Maintaining that illusion while playing I think is the primary reason they were included, not actually the experience of "knowing" the history. Rain World in general seems to have a thematic fixation on the simple idea that individuals have limited perspectives. Joar Jakobsson has said that one of the core ideas behind Rain World was to recreate the life of a "rat in Manhattan." That is to say, a creature that understands how to find food, hide, and live in a complex man-made structure, that cannot understand it's structuring purpose or why it was built. The very core issue of the iterators, is that the solution to the "great problem" intrinsically has to lie with knowledge that could only be obtained from "the other side." They are corporeal beings trying to know something that pertains to something outside corporeal reality. Yet pursuit of knowledge is very important to creatures like ourselves. Collecting any individual pearl is mostly an exercise in doing a lot just for little bits of knowledge. There is a lot of understanding of just how significant wanting to know more is, even something unimportant, when you are left in the dark the way you are in the game. Most information pearls you deliver are literally completely useless to know about, but they feel personally important, especially in how finding them relates to your connection to the iterators. My primary motivation to find pearls in my first play was to spend more time with Moon. On a very real emotional level, Moon felt like my only friend in the world while I played. On a mechanical level, she does literally nothing. But Rain World manages to operate on a very emotional, even instinctual level with how it's designed. I wanted to be in her company and have something to give her. Because I am alone, and lost. So something along those lines is why I felt saddened to hear the sentiment like Rain World somehow "fails" to deliver it's "story." The purpose of the game is not to find pearls and hear about some grand narrative. At it's core, Rain World is a game that's design was inspired by nature, and it's use of history within the world relates to us as a player the way history relates to us as people. It is relayed through people reading from records created by parties with their own perspectives, and connects us abstractly to a sensation that there is more out there than our own lives. That is a feeling you have as a player, and ultimately the true story that Rain World tells is the memories you have playing it. What you did, saw, and felt. The same as how our story is that of our own lives. That is the purpose of the game.

[miguelswifey04]

gabby’s first grade teacher asking her to write down her parents name for a “my family assignment”

miguel o’hara & cariño (or like any of the various nicknames miguel calls the reader)

she shows it off proudly to miguel during school pickup. He sees her answers and just laughs, realizing he needs to clarify things later when they get home.

fem! reader x miguel o’hara and gabriella o’hara

gabriella is proud to show miguel that she did her “my family assignment” but, she accidentally writes down the nickname that miguel calls you instead of your actual name. miguel, finding it funny still clarifies to his 6 year old daughter.

as the day came to an end, miguel arrived at gabriella’s school for pickup, his thoughts consumed with work and other responsibilities. weaving through the crowd of children and parents, he spotted gabriella, her face beaming with excitement, clutching a piece of paper. “daddy, daddy!" gabriella called out, running towards him with the paper in her hands. look what i wrote for the 'my damily' assignment!"

curiosity piqued, miguel took the paper and read the words gabriella had written. his eyebrows shot up in surprise, quickly followed by a deep chuckle that escaped his lips. it seems he hadn't been clear enough with gabriella about his and your relationship.

taking a deep breath, miguel squatted down to his daughter's level. "gabriella, sweetheart, i love that you're proud of our family, but let's clarify something," he began, his voice gentle yet firm. “cariño," he said, using one of the nicknames he often called you, "is not your mother’s actual name. it’s more like a term of endearment, like 'sweetheart' or 'darling.' my name is miguel o’hara, just like yours, gabriella o’hara.”

gabriella's brow furrowed in confusion as she processed her father's explanation. "oh," she replied, her voice tinged with disappointment. miguel quickly held gabriella’s tiny hands in his. "but that doesn't change anything about how much i love you and your mother," he reassured her, his eyes warm with affection. "we’re still a loving family, no matter what names we use."

a small smile blossomed on gabriella's face as she looked up at her father. "okay, daddy. i still love you and mommy, no matter what." miguel's heart swelled with love and pride for his daughter. he gave her a tender hug, cherishing the warmth of their bond. "i love you too, gabriella. always remember that." walking hand in hand out of the school, miguel couldn't help but reflect on the importance of open communication within their family. it was a reminder for him to be clearer with gabriella and ensure she understood the intricacies of their relationship.

arriving home, miguel made a mental note to have a conversation with you, ensuring you were both on the same page when it came to talking with gabriella about their family dynamics. their love, communication, and understanding would continue to guide them as they navigated the joys and challenges of parenthood - a journey they embraced with open hearts.

tags 🏷️!! @kairiscorner @emiemiemiii @astro1bloom @obi-mom-kenobi @sabcandoit @meeom

[graceraindrops-blog]

How much of a terrible mom was Cordelia? A full explanation.

It's a shame that the first post of my blog is dedicated to a rather ''interesting'' take @yuikomorii showed me, but taking into account that I've done my research involving the mothers, I find it a perfect opportunity to make a full explanation of Cordelia's abusive behavior.

Before I start, I would like to talk about why Cordelia acted the way she did (I AM NOT JUSTIFYING HER ACTIONS).

We know that Cordelia's father was neglectful towards her after the death of her mother which made her lack the ability to understand love.

Karlheinz manipulated Cordelia into marrying him and giving him children FORCEFULLY (because Cordelia did not want to have children). He also convinced Cordelia that it was okay for her to have many lovers and to have sexual relationships with FAMILY members

Cordelia's abusive behavior towards the triplets also comes over the fact of her jealousy and obsession with Karlheinz and surpassing Beatrix and Christa.

Getting this out of the way I will now start explaining why Cordelia was NOT a good mother despite her traumas.

It's not strange to view Cordelia negatively if she's one of the antagonists of the franchise. NEVER did Diabolik lovers ever paint Cordelia as a good person and constantly tell us about how shitty she was towards her children and how much it affected them.

2. I'm not denying the fact that around those times parenting was more strict, however, you're forgetting that Cordelia didn't just slap, ground, or yell at her children, she put intense waves of pressure on Ayato, and drowned him, she sexually abused Laito, manipulated him and groomed him when he was a KID, forced Kanato to sing until he bled and made him watch her have intercourse with other men. This was the abuse the triplets went through until they finally had enough and attempted to kill Cordelia, which they succeeded.

3. Yes, it's true that Beatrix wouldn't give the triplets much attention or love, she would probably neglect them due to not being her biological children and belonging to her rival, however, Beatrix WOULD NEVER do the messed up stuff Cordelia did. Yes, she was a terrible mother to Shu and Reiji, yet she would've never stepped down at Cordelia's level.

4. A normal mother doesn't drown and threaten her child due to personal issues, A normal mother doesn't sexually abuse her child and grooms him to make him depend on her, and a normal mother doesn't force her child to watch her have sex with men and doesn't use his singing voice to get horny. If she was an affectionate mother ayato wouldn't have found the need to HIDE himself from her and the triplets wouldn't have considered killing her.

5. I would also like to add, that no matter how badly influenced Cordelia was, and no matter how much childhood trauma she went through, that would never be a justification for the way she treated her children. This does not only apply to Cordelia, this applies to every character and to real people as well. It's a reason why they behave that way, but never a justification. Also, Cordelia doing the bare minimum and behaving like an actual mother for a few moments does not mean she cares about her children. I don't think this is explicitly told, but I believe in those particular scenes she's grooming Kanato to become dependent on her like she did with Laito and Ayato.

6. ''She never spoke that way to her children'' I'm sorry but I have to laugh?? I would've understood if you were an anime only (not really) but taking into account that you do know about the games this is really really wrong lol. I don't why it's difficult to understand that Cordelia didn't love her children. Cordelia is such a bad mother that when she was resurrected in Ayato's DF route, she didn't even apologize to him or to his siblings, and yet he still forgave her! She even told Ayato to APOLOGIZE to her and continued to insult him

(Credits to @dialovers-translations)

I understand (I think everyone in the fandom does) that Cordelia had her reasons to behave this way (childhood trauma and manipulation) but that doesn't excuse her actions. I don't agree with people hating on Cordelia and loving Karlheinz but I also don't agree with people defending Cordelia and saying she did nothing wrong when she did.

Cordelia isn't a black-and-white character and she's not a bad character either, she's very well-written for her purpose (an antagonist) but she's not a good person or mother. She never regretted what she did and if she was still alive during HDB she would've still been abusive to the triplets.

This is my problem with morally grey characters/Evil characters. They can't exist in media if people ignore their wrongdoings and actions and try to justify said actions. I'm not saying that they shouldn't exist but I'm tired of people painting them as good people or justifying their actions when their whole purpose as a character is to show that they're not good people and their actions are/were wrong.

To finish off the post I would like to say that I love Cordelia's character and I consider her to be one of the best-written characters in Diabolik Lovers. In my opinion, I would've liked to know more about her in further games but even if I feel this way about her I don't justify her actions and that's something we should all do. I'm glad the fandom no longer justifies the actions of the characters (with some obvious exceptions). And even if I like Cordelia as a character I don't shame others for not liking her, at the end of the day she was a horrible person lol.

[coupleoffanfics]

Batfam and batsis y/n headcons

y/n's Younger Years

8-12 years old

y/n was brought to the manor for the first time when she was 8 years old. Often got lost in the place because of how big it is the first week. If she couldn't find where she was trying to get to and no one was around to help, she'd just slump against the wall. Silently cry until someone was passing by, it was usually Alfred.

Jason just became Robin when y/n rolls in. He doesn't have much of an option of her for the first few weeks. Thought she was annoying with how much she cried and how clingy she was.

She clings to anyone because she doesn't want to be left alone in general and especially not in an unfamiliar environment. Alfred became her favorite first because of his cooking and baking. Jason is the second person she clings to. The only reason Bruce is in third place is because Jason just looked less scary.

When Bruce and Jason come back from a rough mission, Alfred walks up to the both of them before handing them each a paper. "Miss y/n made this for you before going to bed."  The two pieces of paper were drawings of their hero personas. Both written at the top, "My #1 hearo!". The misspell adds to the charm of the crayon drawing.

Sometimes if y/n and Jason happen to be in the library at the same time. She asks him what a word is, what it means, and how to pronounce it. It's kinda cute, until it happens every 3 minutes. He didn't think much of it, just thought that she was just a dumb kid being a dumb kid.

Later speculates that she might be dyslexic and lets y/n reads out loud to him. Helping her sound out the words and whatnot. Surprisingly he finds himself enjoying helping her and kinda looks forward to these readings. He notices how her reading gets more fluent as time goes on and he can't help but feel proud.

Before going off on a mission or patrol, y/n always hugs Bruce. If he's going on a mission she makes sure to hug him longer and tighter. Explaining, "To give you more power to be safe." Does not understand what the hell she's saying, but still appreciates it.

"Why don't you give Jason a hug?" Bruce asks after hearing the explanation. "Because Jason is already strong and protects you. You need as much strength." Bruce kinda just sits there more confused than ever and Jason is smirking to himself. He doesn't understand what y/n said himself, but what he does know is that she said he was stronger than Bruce and that's all he needed to hear.

Whenever Dick comes around to visit, he tries to make an effort to connect with y/n. She already has Alfred, Jason, and Bruce so she doesn't really feel the need to care about him on a deeper level. He's barely there and she already has enough people that she can cling on to.

He'll show off his acrobatic skills and y/n just drily says, "That's cool." Then runs off to find Jason. He's totally not hurt by the fact that his little sister likes Jason more than him. What? No.

It's not like he wanted a poorly drawn Nightwing that had, "#1 hearo", written on it. That he'd treasure and keep forever. No, he didn't care about that. Yep, not one bit. Though sadly he's not able try to bond with y/n as much as he'd liked since he's leading the Titans.

Barbara isn't around when y/n is usually awake. Often handle cams and technical things as Oracle. Though when they do interact y/n just in awe simply by the fact that she's still working in the hero field after what Joker did. Training hard, so that she'd live up to Barbara's legacy as Batgirl.

The two aren't too close yet when y/n is young, but they're definitely closer than y/n is with Dick. y/n totally didn't have a puppy crush on Barbara for the longest time. Okay, she did for a bit.

A year in the manor, Bruce begins to train y/n more. Taking note of how she's quick on her feet, but her punches are slower than her kicks. Is worried how much she looks up to Jason because Jason is rather reckless and doesn't mind putting himself in danger. Honestly he would have liked it if she just looked up to Dick or someone else.

Batman isn't about violence as ironic as it sounds. Violence is only to be used when there is no other way to stop one from harming others. So Bruce was kinda worried that y/n might take a more brash approach by following Jason, but it turned out to be the opposite.

Almost reminded him of Dick with her passive approach. Almost because she's just a bit too passive at times. It takes three years for y/n to be able to take on the Batgirl persona. Mainly because it's taken a while for her not just to dodge, but also take action by attacking.

Taking action probably wouldn't have come sooner if it wasn't for Jason's death. Hearing the news was hard for everyone. y/n was put to bed before it happened, so she was told of what happened by Bruce the next morning. Not saying any explicit details.

Everything around her seemed so much more somber. The man that was telling her what happened while looking away from her felt surreal. It was like losing her parents again.

She became numb. She heard the words and understood them, she just couldn't believe it. Not even when she watched his casket being lowered into the ground, she couldn't believe it.

Seeing how Bruce was putting on a straight face made things harder. It was like nothing had happened. She knew when she was older that was far from the case, but at the time it made her feel like that's what she had to do as well. He spent more time being Batman, that meant she'd spend more time training.

It worries Barbara and Alfred seeing how both of them are becoming closed off. Barbara takes note of how often y/n looks at Jason's memorial. When she tries to comfort y/n, the girl is quick to avoid the conversation. She might just walk away if Barbara keeps pressing on the subject.

Less time playing or drawing. More time in the batcave and avoiding the library. Months after everything Bruce allows her to pick up the Batgirl persona.

Putting on the suit for the first time didn't feel as grand as she thought it would. It left a bitter taste in her mouth. She wanted to rip it off because it felt like there was no point. It felt like all this constant training to be Batgirl was all for nothing. She came up with this fantasy that becoming a hero would free her from this numbness, that it’d make her happy just like it had Jason. Yet all it did was remind her that maybe if she tried harder to become Batgirl sooner that she could have a chance at saving him. She wished she could have hugged him before saying goodnight that night.

The only reason she didn't rip off it and burn the suit was because Bruce was waiting. There was no time to waste since Poison Ivy was on the radar tonight.

Jason's name is rarely said, but thought of more often than not. The only time y/n and Barbra openly talked about him was after dealing with the Joker and Quinn.

y/n didn't immediately leave the batcave like usual after every patrol or mission. She just stood in front of his memorial staring at the costume while Bruce left to do something that y/n didn't care about. It was just y/n and Barbara alone in the cave. "I miss him." Her voice echoed out nearly scared Barbara.

Barbara stopped what she was doing and responded with, "I do too." She waited for a moment to see if y/n would keep talking. She didn't want to push it since this is the first time y/n is even openly talking about him.

After the brief silence y/n asked, "He's in a better place, right? That means I shouldn't be sad, but I still miss him. I don't care if he's in a better place like everyone says, I want him back here with us." That's what opened the floodgates. The rest of the night was spent talking about the late Robin and helping y/n with accepting his death. Also giving her a new found eagerness towards being Batgirl and forming a strong bond with Barbara.

There was no chance of her saving Jason back then, but now she can at least save others from facing the same fate as him.

Then Tim crashes in and suddenly y/n has another brother. If Bruce thought he was good then y/n thought so too. Originally she thought that she wasn't going to be that close to Tim, but they just clicked. Tim thought y/n was so cool when she put on her suit and fought crime with Bruce. He couldn't wait to fight alongside both of them.

y/n saw Tim as a geekier and nerdier Barbra honestly. He may be smarter than Barbra, but she'll always be the best one in y/n opinion.

Tim would try to teach y/n how to hack or code since she showed interest in it, but she never got the hang of it. It usually just resulted in them goofing around. Lounging on the couch while playing video games. Tim was more into games that have sci fi themes, while y/n liked to play fantasy games, but they both loved RPGs. It's clear who was putting more thought in the game because y/n just spams attack and Tim is writing down the crit rates.

By the time Tim comes around, y/n is starting to babble in culinary. If she finishes making something, she'll wander around to find him. Makes him put down whatever he's doing to try what she made. She insists that she doesn't have a favorite when shoving food in Tim's face. "You're my lab rat. Testing if my cooking is edible before I give it to Pa, Alfred, or Barbara."

They used to have the same classes until Tim was able to skip a grade. y/n doesn't tell anyone that she's upset about it, but everyone can tell and Tim makes sure to reassure her. "It's not like we're going to never see each other again, y/n. We'll see each other in the halls and during lunch." She sighs, "I know, I know. Just let me wallow in my feelings and I'll be fine."

When there are low days for y/n that make it impossible for her to get out of bed, Tim sits in her room. Chatting about anything and not leaving her alone unless asked. It's nice that he does that, yet it still makes her feel bad for making him stay with her. It's not like she asked for company and she does need it during those moments. It made her feel like a liability.

Everyone is happy to see y/n and Tim getting along so well. y/n hasn't been as talkative or lively since Jason.

When Tim becomes Robin, y/n is put off by how much he resembles Jason. It kinda scared her. She never realized how similar they both look. It makes her wonder if that's why Bruce adopted Tim and allowed him to become Robin.

Catwoman has a soft spot for the newest Batgirl. She just watches her run around with Batman and Robin. There's just a sense of goofiness to the new Batgirl that she can't take seriously.

y/n's Teenage Years

13- 18 years old

The whole Red Hood ark left y/n with a broken arm, bruises, and wondering if this was what she wanted. It was nice to see Jason again, but it felt like she couldn't approach him. Also spending a lot of time in the batcave with Barbara and Alfred since she couldn't patrol with a broken arm. "At least he didn't break my dominant arm." y/n chuckled to herself humorously, Barbara doesn't laugh and glances at y/n. Barbara didn't find anything funny about it and she's sure y/n didn't either, she was probably still in shock.

Barbara is kinda mad at Jason, may or may not want to run over his foot with her wheelchair. Of course, she understands the betrayal and anger that he feels. She just thinks trying to take out y/n as well is a bit much, well everything that he's doing it a bit much. She just thought out of everyone y/n would be given the most mercy by Jason.

Jason may have forgiven Batman and everyone to an extent, but she just can't help herself from feeling guilty. Of course, she noticed that not only did he distance himself from the family, but her as well. He'd never be in the same room with y/n long enough for her to ask how he was doing. It made her believe that he was resentful toward her. It didn't matter if that wasn't the case, it just hurt that the person she's been missing for years doesn't want anything to do with her.

The thought of if there was even a point to any of this came up once more. Tim was joining the Titans for a bit, Jason was off on his own, Dick was in Blüdhaven or something y/n didn't care, and Bruce and Barbara were doing what they always do. It just wasn't as appealing as it once was. It almost became stale and she found herself feeling happier doing less action packed things.

Then one night y/n impulsively said that she wanted to quit to Burce. It wasn't a surprise to him as he saw her diverging from the path and let her drop the Batgirl persona. Honestly he was glad that she quit, he wished that his other kids would choose to live a normal life. That was one less child to worry about getting killed.

Of course, Barbara is the first to question y/n about her decision. A little while later Tim is the one trying to get an answer out of y/n. Jason is too ashamed to ask or even be near y/n. Dick doesn't find out until a month later after visiting the manor then starts asking if y/n was okay this and that. None of them got a concrete answer except for Barbara.

"It's something I'm not interested in anymore. I want to live a normal life, get married, and have kids. I'm not going to truly have that if I stay as Batgirl. And I'm not like any of you. I'm not good enough, I'm never good enough. Gotham never needed me anyway and they won't be losing anything because I quit."

Hearing that, Barara immediately opened her arms signaling for a hug. Feeling overwhelmed from spilling out her feelings, y/n accepted the hug. "I understand and I won't stop you. If being Batgirl doesn't make you happy, that's perfectly fine. You deserve happiness just like everyone else. The only thing I'm against is you calling yourself worthless. You were a good- no you were amazing as Batgirl and you are amazing when you aren't. Remember that."

Tears are running down the girl's [skin tone] face. Her throat was tight and she knew she couldn't talk without making a guttural sound. So she nodded her head. Barbara held y/n until she let go. Wiping the tears from her face, she turned to Barbara and said, "Please don't tell the others about this." Barbara kept this between them.

It's clear that out of the whole family that Barbara is the first and really only one y/n goes to for emotional support. y/n hates crying in front of anyone seeing it as her personal weakness. y/n is close to Tim, he doesn't know how to respond to y/n's emotions. Barbara seemed to always know what to say and y/n felt more comfortable being vulnerable around her.

The drift from the family isn't noticeable. y/n comes down to the batcave from time to time, but her time there is greatly cut in half. She starts hanging around her best friend, Norah, more often. Joins the track and fencing club seemingly not able to let go of some old habits.

When Tim leaves for the Titans the mark of when y/n and the family drift apart. There's small chat and not complete strangers. When Tim does come back he has taken on a new persona of Red Robin.

It's just a normal day, y/n is messing around in the kitchen when Tim comes up to her. There's just a strong air of anxiety around him that makes her anxious. "y/n, I need to tell you something." She puts down the cookbook and looks at him with a raised eyebrow. He takes a deep breath, "I'm bisexual." y/n's shoulders suddenly relax and she starts laughing.

He's confused and not sure what to do. She quickly explains through her laughter, "I'm sorry. I just thought you were going to say something horrible like you ran over a cat or something. I don't know." Taking a moment to calm herself she adds, "That's cool, I'm bi/pan. I also need to go to the bathroom, could you please watch the water and make sure it doesn't boil over? Please and thank you!"

She doesn't make a big deal over it because she just sees it as normal. It's nothing to celebrate about in her opinion, but she's glad Tim trusted her enough to tell her. Most of the family probably doesn't know her sexuality since she hasn't openly said it. It's just something that she doesn't feel the need to talk about.

Damian enters the picture when it's been almost a year since y/n quit. She is completely put off by how he behaves and has no idea how to handle it. He likes picking on his siblings, but when he picks on y/n it almost seems malicious. Whenever she tries to bond with him or get to know him, he just snaps at her.

Now she kinda knows how Dick felt.

Speaking of Dick, he starts coming around the manor more. Only for Damin of course and y/n can't help but feel almost a little jealous. He never took her out for bowling or anything when she was Damian's age. That jealousy then evaporates seconds later because she realizes how to stupid it is to be jealous over that. Damian needs a lot of help to be integrated into normal society.

Jabs made at her are brushed off as she believes that it's just him coping. He was in a new environment with new people, it was only natural for him to cope in some way regardless if it was healthy or not. His insults were never that bad. Often consisting of calling her worthless.

They were just jabs and nothing more. Not knowing that it was chipping away at her already fragile self confidence. Damian is part of the reason why she doesn't go to the batcave anymore or talk at the dinner table. Also always has something to say, something to nitpick. With how consistent it is, y/n goes to Bruce.

Asking if he could tell Damian to just knock it off just once. She thought that he'd talk to Damian and that things will cool down since she can't even get a word in without him saying something. It's not like he never listened to her anyway. Then Bruce tells her to bush it off. He's just a kid and he's going through a lot. Bruce doesn't even look up from his paperwork when saying this.

It was like y/n was smacked in the face. She wonders if he believes what Damian is saying. That she had no right to be living here with them or that just a freeloader. She felt like she couldn't go to Tim about this as she didn't want to emit that this kid's words were getting to her. She doesn't even want to go to Barbara about this.

Because maybe Damian is right.

y/n didn't deserve to be around heroes. All she did was waste their time when they could have been saving lives. They'd go to her fencing tournaments when they should be locking up villains. She was truly a waste of space.

Lowkey Damian wants y/n to fight him. He wants to see Batgirl in action and see what her fighting style would be like. To some extent he just wants her attention, but how he goes about it just pushes her away. He's seen her fencing a few times and is kinda impressed by her fast and fluent movements.

During her junior year at high school was when she started cutting off ties with the family. Never talking during dinner, never showing up at the dinner table. If she's not out of the manor then she's in her room. Everyone is so busy that no one notices her isolating herself. No one, but Barbara.

Barbara tries talking to y/n, but she is constantly shutting it down. Constantly running away from any conversion. Yet Barbara doesn't give up as usual. Unlike any other times y/n doesn't open up.

One day Barbara said something that made y/n let her walls down. "I'll alway make time for you." She stops walking, thinking to herself before looking over her shoulder and tells Barbara, "I have practice next monday, but after that we could go see a movie or something. If you want." The woman nods her head with a small smile.

Tim is no longer y/n's favorite. Not favorite, just no longer the one y/n hangs out with the most. Barbara is the only family member that y/n lets her walls down for. The only family member that she keeps in touch with.

When y/n gets a boyfriend. y/n makes a beeline toward Barbara for any advice. With how much she gushes over him, Barbara wants to meet him. It takes a while for the two to meet and when they do it's kinda awkward. Xander Jeremiah is every stoic and not sociable. Barbara doesn't know what to think of him, but if he does care about y/n that's all that really matters. 

Seeing the two of them interact reminds Barbara of those dumb intj and infp relationship memes she saw online.

y/n Young Adult (Present)

19 years old

y/n doesn't really tell the family much of any and would not be surprised if they didn't know she moved out after high school. As much as y/n wanted to get out of Gotham, she ended up staying because of best friend and boyfriend. Going to college and majoring in art. Barbara and y/n spend a little less time with each other, but still text almost daily.

y/n is forced to interact with her family after Jerome becomes a prominent figure in Gotham and has some odd obsession with her. After an incident at a charity event, y/n is persuaded into staying in the manor. She planned on staying for only a week or so. At least until Jerome was caught and sent to Arkham.

Damian is more mellowed out and almost makes an effort to talk to y/n, but she just tries to get away from him as soon as possible.

Tim is concerned about the aloofness y/n projects around others. Also highly suspicious of that blonde lady that comes around to talk to y/n. She's never been so secretive before and it hurts that she doesn't come to him about anything like she used to.

Jason still tries not to interact with y/n, but he lingers around the manor. He can't bring himself to forgive himself for physically hurting her all those years ago. He promised himself that he'd protect his little sister when he was Robin and broke it again by letting Gotham's newest psycho kidnap her.

Dick acts like everything is fine or is going to be fine. That he and y/n had always been somewhat close. Not taking a hint that he's overstepped a boundary that he never had the right to cross.

Bruce is Bruce. Bruceing around or something, y/n doesn't really know what he does anymore. He's the one who suggests that y/n relearn self defense and she agrees. It's been awhile since she even fought anyone, so she is a bit rusty.

Damian would have offered to teach her, but Dick and Tim are fighting over the possession. Tim wants to reconnect with y/n, back to being friends that have each other's backs. Dick is trying to help y/n. He has the most fighting exprace, so that means he should be the one to teach y/n. Jason is not going near y/n. In the end y/n had Bruce reteach her self defense. It was just like old times.

The whole time there the family is awkwardly interacting with y/n. When at the dinner table there are questions thrown at her. She answers just about any question almost curtly. The only question that she seems to avoid is about the blond lady. "She's just a friend." y/n claims, "Everyone just calls her Echo. It is a childhood name." It was clear that she was lying, everyone knew it, but no one called it out.

They always talked in private. In hushed tones and "Echo" never stayed for long. Honestly Tim thought that Echo was y/n's girlfriend after walking by her room when Echo was in there, he swears he heard y/n say I love you. When Tim told the other about this, Barbara was rolling her eyes. There was no way that y/n would cheat on Xander. Even if they broke up Barbara would have known, she assumes that y/n meant it in a platonic way. y/n has always been quite affectionate in both platonic and romantic relationships.

When Jerome is caught and sent to Arkham, y/n goes straight back to her apartment. It doesn't matter how much they try to get her to stay, Jerome is locked up and there is no reason for any intense security. If they try to counter her argument, she'll just drop the act and lay almost everything out.

"I don't want to be here, I don't belong here, and there isn't anything that is going to keep me here now that Jerome is in Arkham." Her voice wasn't loud, just tired and almost upset.

The most affected by her words is Damian ironically. Her words echo the things he said a while ago. He never gave a second thought of how it affected her. Hearing y/n say that and walk out the manor without looking back left him stunned. He didn't know what to do, what to say. That night he didn't sleep.

The family will try to keep their distance. Except for Damian and Dick. Dick will hang around the college campus and try to drag y/n off somewhere, if her best friend is with her then they'll drag her away before Dick is even able to say anything. Sadly her friend isn't always there, so there are some days she spends the afternoon at the zoo or amusement park with Dick. Damian will just show up at y/n's apartment and walk in like he owns the place. She has no idea how he got a spare key, but she is too busy trying to get him out to think about that.

Damian finds out y/n is in a big sister program and he'll screeching at her. "Why are you taking care of them? You're my big sister, not theirs! They don't have the right to call you their sister!" He's having a mental meltdown in the middle of her living room. She has no idea what the fuck it going on and doesn't know how to handle it. When she tries to calm him down, he starts throwing things and that's when she dials Dick's number.

Dick is able to calm Damian down and drives him back to the manor. Before they go Dick talks y/n. "You know how Damian is, he is very protective of those he cares about. I am just disappointed in both of you. He should haven't reacted that way, but you shouldn't be in that program in the first place. You already have Danian and I think this just made him feel like he isn't important to you." y/n has a severe case of whiplash after hearing what he just said. She can't argue back because he already left.

The rest of the family isn't going to become full blown yanderes until y/n's boyfriend is gassed by Jerome. y/n doesn't want to deal with the family's bullshit, but she goes to them for help. Revealing Jerome's twin brother, but not explicitly stating that Jeremiah is her boyfriend and begs for them to help in finding a cure. Barbara is the one in the room who is the most shocked by this information.

Spoiler they don't find a cure and when Jeremiah is pushed over the edge, that’s around the time they are too.

I'm cutting it off here. I wrote so much and I might pick this back up. I’ve just been listening to FNAF ambience music while writing this. Have yet to proofread this, so sorry for any and all mistakes.

Part 2

[imababblekat]

Delirium?

@lil-hun-bun​ , “Raph x fem!Reader where he's taking care of her because she's sick and they end up confessing their feelings for each other, perhaps?”

~xXx~

All it took was one word, and the red cladded ninja turtle was scaling across rooftops to your place of residence. Sick. That’s what you had texted him after rejecting his call to hang out. It had him notably concerned, as there had been times when even if you had a small cough you’d still at the very least enter a video chat with him. However, no interaction at all was very unlike you. 

Raphael did his best to conceal his racing thoughts, picking the lock on your window before making his way in. He couldn’t quite understand why he was so worried to begin with. It wasn’t like you were in the hospital or anything else of a more serious level. Part of him was actually quite irritated by the his fretful emotions. Not at you of course, more of what you seemed to do him lately. He’d never been this concerned over something so silly before. Even when one of his brothers or April would come down with a nasty cold, he’d just offer if they needed something from the store and leave it at that. In fact, in most cases he’d leave things to Donnie, unless it was said terrapin who had been ill. Yet when he’d received your message, the thought to ask Donnie or give his brother the heads up, didn’t even cross his mind. 

What was it about you in particular that made Raph of all people go out of his way, just by one simple text message? 

The answer had struck him when, after giving you a quick heads up to his presence, he entered your room to find you in an unsightly state, his heart dropping in his plated chest.

Across the room, snuggled under a pile of blankets and surrounded by tissues, you lay as pale as your sheets and covered in sweat like on a hot summer afternoon. The weakness in just lifting your head to peer over at the larger turtle and the croak in your voice had Raph’s heart strings tugged. 

“Raph? What are you doing here?”

It wasn’t even a second after finishing your question that you fell into a fit of coughs, and Raphael was quick to make his way to your beside, taking off and opening the small backpack he’d brought with him. Inside were bottles of water and multiple types of medicine he’d dumped in his rush to get to you.

“What da ya think? You don’t answer my call, send me a one worded text with no further explanation, and expect me to not show up?”

You gingerly reached for a water bottle he’d opened and offered you, sitting up as best you could to take a few sips and completely unware at Raph’s resistance to assist you. 

“To be honest, I would have expected Donnie, but you’re a nice surprise.”

Raph raised a brow ridge, sitting at your feet, the bed dipping with his weight and you’re feet resting against his thigh beneath the blankets.

“I’m not sure how to take that, so I choose to take it as a compliment.”

You giggled at his scowling face, eyes crinkling in the corner. Man, even when bed ridden, Raphael couldn’t deny the way you caused a light flutter of butterflies in his stomach. However, the sweet moment hadn’t lasted long when you suddenly erupted into another, heavier fit of coughs. Seeing you turn over to your side, nearly dropping and spilling the water in your hand had he’d not rushed to grab it for you with his quick reflexes, Raph felt a newfound type of panic.

“Hey, don’t go dyin on me now, doll. Tell me what I can do.”

His voice was softer than usual, you almost hadn’t heard him, but you did, and could just about feel the deep worriment dripping from each word. 

“Got any cough meds in that mystery bag of yours?”, you asked, laying back against your pillows, head pounding and body sore.

There was a minute of rummaging beside you, when your normally brutish friend procured a plastic bottle with red liquid within. 

“Um, I’ve got this?”

You took a peak, too tired to sit up again.

“Cough syrup. That’ll work.”

Raphael said nothing in reply, simply working to get the lid off and pour the heavy cherry smelling liquid into the small cup it came with. No words were spoken or asked, as a large hand, one usually so fierce had cradled and lifted your head with the upmost care and gentleness. Raph watched as you slurped down the cough syrup, cringing at the sickly gag you let out once finished, before just as gently resting your head back down against your pillow.

“Need anythin’ else?”, he questioned, hand resting on the dip of your side as you slowly rolled over to face him.

“Yeah.”, you mumbled, snuggling into your covers but keeping your gaze tiredly focused on his, “For you to know I mean it.”

A small chuckle left Raph’s beautiful lips.

“Mean what?”

“What I said earlier.”, you murmured, reaching a shaky hand from your covers to reach for the wrapped hand resting by your pillow. 

Even in such a weak state, the light caresses you made across Raphaels large hand was enough to cause his heart to skip a beat. He looked to the side, suddenly feeling pressure under your gaze, his cheeks tinting ever so lightly.

“Pfft, sure. You’re delirious.”

“Raphael.”

The full call of his name, as well as the light squeeze of his hand by your much smaller one, was enough to convince the ninja turtle to take a chance and look your way. Despite the bags under your exhausted eyes and the strands of hair sticking to your sweat clad face, you somehow managed to convey every bit of seriousness and truth to your next words.

“Why is me enjoying having you here instead of anyone else that unbelievable? You’re my closest friend. You know how much like being around you. . .how much I like you.”

The last words were said with your cheeks flushing a lovely red hue, and while you knew Raph was aware of the true cause, maybe, just maybe it could pass as due to being sick. Gently shaking your head, pushing aside the anxiousness in your own chest, you looked back up to offer a silent Raphael a gentle smile.

“And I’m not delirious.”, you reached up to gentle boop his nose. 

Raph grasped your hand in his, but didn’t release it as he had started to copy the same soothing motions you had done with his hand a little earlier. His heart felt so full. Just as you caused him to fret so much over a single worded text, only you could make his heart do ninja flips while looking like the plague. Honestly, that somehow made him even more fond of you. Just like all those times you had gone out of your way to care for him, a mutant turtle who people only saw as a burly ball of anger and furry. Perhaps those times of your unique kindness towards him was also why he’d go out of his way to care for you in this moment as opposed to how he would for anyone else. 

Maneuvering your hand, Raphael turned his face ever so slightly to place his lips softly against your palm, the feeling of a chaste kiss being left there as he spoke.

“Yah, I know, doll.”

~xXx~

[runnning-outof-time]

John & "Listen to yourself.”

Angst to fluff!

Thanks for sending this in, anon! I’m sorry it took me a bit to get to write it! I hope it’s along the lines of what you were thinking of! Also just try to imagine it’s (Y/N) instead of Esme in the gif - I felt that it fit the scene and couldnt help but use it! Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Part of my 3.5k Celebration - find more stories here!

But I Got Your Mind Off of It

John Shelby x Reader

Warnings: language, mention of a weapon

Word Count: 1111

Summary: John manages to talk (Y/N) off the ledge before she blows up the longest relationship she has over something so silly…which happens to be something she’s also done before.

The sound of the bang that the door closing made was even loud enough to make John Shelby jump. He scrambled from the table he was sitting at to get over to the concealed hole in the wall where a revolver was nestled. He was just about to access it when he noticed who had slammed the door.

“The fuck was that for, (Y/N)?” he asked his wife, his brows furrowing together in confusion.

(Y/N) didn’t hear him though. She was too busy pacing the floor while muttering unintelligible things. Something about someone being stupid and never wanting to see them again. John wracked his brain for a moment, trying to figure out if it was something that he’d done.

He decided to finally approach her when he came up empty. “What’s goin’ on with you, love?” he asked her, hoping that his voice was level enough so that she wouldn’t get set off…even more than she all already had been.

“I just can’t believe she did that to me,” she finally spoke clear enough for John to hear what she was saying.

“Who did what?” John still didn’t quite understand what was going on.

“Mary,” (Y/N) snapped, as if she was annoyed that John hadn’t come into the conversation with all of the details.

But that didn’t stop John from asking more questions. “What did Mary do?” was his next one.

“She stood me up. We had an entire evening planned and then she cancelled last minute!” she didn’t hesitate in sharing her frustrations, aggravation starkly present in her words.

John furrowed his eyebrows as he took a moment to figure out which way he should approach the situation. (Y/N) was not one to be messed with when she was hot about something, and he hadn’t seen her this worked up in a long time. But before he was able to do anything however, (Y/N) was turning to leave the shop.

“That’s it!” she proclaimed as she made for the door, “I’m going to give her a piece of my mind!” She then started angrily walking towards the door. Just as her left hand reached for the knob, her right was pulled backwards. She gasped as she was spun and within seconds, her back was pressed against the brick wall. Her eyes widened as she looked at her husband, who now had her pinned so that she couldn’t leave.

“You’re not going anywhere…not like this, at least,” he told her, speaking in a calm voice because he knew that if he raised it, all hell would break loose.

“Let me go, John,” she huffed, trying, and failing, to break from his grasp.

“Why did she cancel?” he asked, not giving into her wishes.

Lucky for him, (Y/N) was all for giving the details now. “She ditched me to spend time with her new man. We had this night planned for weeks just to have her call me earlier today saying that he’s asked her out for dinner. She’s ditching me for dinner!” She was fuming by the end of her explanation, all of her anger washing back in again. Who ditches their best friend of over 10 years to have dinner with a guy?? The thought of it was absurd!

John searched her eyes for a moment, waiting to see if she had anything else to add. When she stayed silent, he couldn’t help but break into stiffled laughter. This made (Y/N)’s brows furrow. “What the fuck are you laughing about, John?!” she asked incredulously, not sure if she was now more upset with her friend or her husband.

“Listen to yourself, (Y/N),” he began, surpressing his laughter so that a more serious air would fall over the conversation once more.

“What?” she snapped back at him.

“What Mary’s doing…” he started, shaking his head slightly as he snorted to himself, “you did the exact same thing to her when you started seeing me.”

“I did not!” she immediately proclaimed, shocked that he wasn’t taking her side on this matter.

“You absolutely did,” he stood firm with his point.

“Yeah? When?”

“One of the first dates I took you on. I brought you out for dinner, and you told me that you felt so bad for having to cancel your plans with your best friend.”

“Yeah, but…but I felt bad about it,” (Y/N) was quick to point out.

“You don’t think Mary feels bad about it?” John asked with raised eyebrows.

“At least I didn’t cancel the day of!” she pointed out another - what she at least thought was a - flaw in John’s argument.

“Well maybe unlike your amazingly considerate then-boyfriend, now-husband, her boyfriend doesn’t have the same regards to the possibility that Mary had other plans.”

“You’re so full of yourself, John,” (Y/N) snorted as a smile broke passed the deep frown she was wearing.

“Just stating the facts, love,” he winked at her, making her roll her eyes in response. “But I got your mind off of it, didn’t I?” he questioned then.

(Y/N) pursed her lips as she realized what he’d done. Then she silently cursed him and his ability to make her mood change on a dime. She waited a few moments before she, begrudgingly, replied: “you did.”

“Good. Mission accomplished,” he grinned, finally letting go of her hands so that he could settle both of his under her jaw. “Now what I’m hearing from you is…” he paused, licking his lips as his grin grew bigger, “that you’ve got the night free.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes again, trying so hard to keep up the act that she was angry. But it was so damn hard with him looking at her the way he was. “My night is free now,” she finally answered him.

“Which means you’re able to spend it with me?” he checked.

“You don’t have any duties to carry out at the Garrison?” she responded with a question of her own.

“None that are as important as me wife,” he grinned.

“You can be so cheesy sometimes.”

“But I got your mind off of what you were mad about, didn’t I?”

“Just take me out on the town…before I go and change my mind,” she dismissed his question, though the look on her face told him immediately that he was absolutely right.

“You don’t need to ask me twice,” he grinned before he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. “Let’s go,” he said after pulling away, reaching down to take her hand in his and lead her out of the betting shop.

**tagging in a reblog so the notification gets sent out!

MASTERLIST

[the-dawn-star]

Hii!! Can you do Jane x reader where she’s Jane’s mate but still human. One day some important information gets leaked out and everyone in the volturi thinks the reader leaked the info. (Aro can’t read her mind) So they question her for a long time and when she still says that she didn’t do it they make Jane torture her with her power. As Jane is torturing her someone walks in and says that she didn’t do it. By the time Jane stops the reader is passed out. Everyone and mostly Jane regrets what they’ve done. The reader doesn’t wake up for a few days and Jane is in absolute sorrow. And when she finally wakes up she doesn’t even look Jane in the eyes bc of the betrayal she feels. Just a lot of angst yk:))) Buuut they make up in the end. Thank youuu🫶🏻

A/N: Hi and first of all love this idea. I kind of made this longer than intended and I left it guite open ended but I hope you like it and you don't mind I changed it a bit. Once again Jane is the movie version of the character!!!

-S

+800ish words.

CW: I mean Jane tortures Reader. Heavy angst.

Your relationship had been a struggle for a long time. You were still a human and now you were moved to Volterra to live with the vampire royalty. It was all so much, but so was your blossoming love for Jane. Your dear Jane. Jane whose main priority in life was protecting the kings and working. It was all that she had ever known, and you couldn’t even blame her for that. But Jane had started to open up to you as time went on. She talked to you about the most mundane things in her life but in truth you could have listened to her for hours.  

Aro hadn’t loved the idea of Jane finding her mate. He was so protective of the girl that he had found hundreds of years ago. And you didn’t make this protectiveness any easier. Quickly Aro had found out that his powers didn’t work on you. Reason for this wasn’t clear but after a bit of convincing Aro accepted you to move to Volterra to get to know Jane better.  

“My love...” Jane had the voice of an angel and that was the only thing that could wake you up from your sleep without making you pissed off.  

You let out a non-committal groan and opened your eyes.  

“I’m sorry but I need to go to work. There has been a problem...” Jane being evasive made you sit up in worry.  

“What’s wrong?”  

“I can’t talk about it yet, just stay here until I get back, okay?”  

You didn’t have time to answer until your mate had left the room leaving you alone on the cold bed.  

With a bit of hesitation, you laid back down and slowly fell back asleep.  

~~~ 

You woke up with your room door being slammed open. Two guards that you didn’t know walked in and didn’t give you any time before ripping you from the bed and dragged you out of the room.  

You begged for some sort of explanation. Anything that made you understand why you were being dragged to the lower levels of the castle... The levels where you weren’t allowed to go. The levels where Jane had to work sometimes, leaving her exhausted as a vampire can be.  

You were thrown into a small simple room, with a tiny table, chair and a bed, if you could call a mattress with a pillow a bed.  

It was a while before you saw anyone but when you finally saw a person you didn’t assume it would be Jane. Your dear Jane.  

“Jane! My love! What’s going on?!” You asked, hurrying to the door trying to reach your love.  

“Don’t..., I know what you did.”  

The love that you had come so used to was gone from her eyes. Her eyes were pooling with venom and her eyes were dark and sad.  

“What are you talking about?” You asked while feeling the anxiety rising up to the surface.  

“Don’t play dumb! You were the only one I told about the plans! Aro was read everyone's minds already! It has to be you so just admit it please!” 

Jane’s yells bounced off the walls and for the first time looking at her you didn’t see your love. You saw a terrified and angry young woman, who could case you more pain than you could ever imagine. Was this what most people saw when looking at your mate? Danger? Pain?  

“Are you talking about the Romanians? Is this all about that!”  

Jane had told you about Aro’s plan to kill the rest of the Romanian coven, but all the details she had told you were now erased from your mind by time.  

“Yes, it is, so just confess!” Your normally calm Jane, she was panicking.  

You didn’t have anything left to say. You were confused, scared, angry..., alone. Your only ally in the castle, your dear Jane, had left you.  

“Okay..., if that’s what you want...,” Jane’s words were ominous, and your stress level rose to the roof.  

Then the pain started. The pain that Jane had promised you would never feel. The blinding, fiery pain. You couldn’t feel your body anymore, it was just pain. Until it all went away... 

~~~ 

You finally opened your eyes. You woke up back in your bed and for a second it all seemed like a bad dream. You took a deep breath letting yourself sink into the mattress. But your peace was interrupted when you took a look around the room. 

Jane was curled into a corner of the room, eyes glued to you. Her sad eyes. Her black eyes pooled with venom.  

You couldn’t look at her, not right now at least, so you got up from the terribly comfortable bed and walked straight to the bathroom locking it behind you.  

You looked like death. Tired and angry, but you couldn’t do anything about that just yet.  

“I’m really sorry..., you have to believe me, my love. We really thought that it was you...” Jane’s words behind the door didn’t make you feel any better. And to make sure you didn’t lash out you stayed quiet. You had all the right to be quiet after screaming your throat raw.

~~~

Feel like you want to support me via Kofi? No preasure tho!

[honestly-mad-person]

★ WARNINGS: cute names, masturbation, moans, dirty language, orgasms, cum

★ Characters: Xavier x fem!reader

★ Annotation: An alternative development of events after the post "Not for You". 1/2 parts. Zane will be next. I'm not sure what I'm going to write about Rafael, as I'm not really interested in him.

★ Synopsis: One evening you decide to surprise your boyfriend Xavier and call him via video call.

After finding Xavier's contact, you press the video call button and wait for him to answer, keeping your eyes on the screen. A minute later you see your boyfriend's sleepy face.

— Something happened? Why are you calling me – he asks in his voice hoarse from sleep.

— I just missed you, Xavie, – you deliberately keep the camera at your face level, not giving him a chance to see your surprise for him. – I'm sorry for waking you up.

— Nothing, I slept almost all day, – yawning, he rubbed his eyes. – Don't you want to come to my place?

— Uh... Actually, I would like to stay at home, – a smile appears on your face when you "suddenly" lower the camera down for a second.

She has time to show Xavier your new, almost transparent underwear of a delicate blue color, through which your nipples shine.

Bringing the camera back to his face, you stifle a laugh as you watch his eyes widen at what he sees.

— Stop! What is that on you? – his voice sounded more cheerful than a minute ago and sitting in his bed, he looked at your face on the screen.

— Nothing like that, – you hold back a laugh, pretending you don't understand what he's asking.

— I just saw it, — Xavier answers briefly with an interested expression on his face.

— Oh, you mean my clothes? – lowering the camera down, you show him your breasts, allowing him to see the underwear better.

The bra was indeed almost transparent, decorated with small patterns of white stars on the mesh fabric, through which your nipples were clearly visible.

You laughed, watching as Xavier stared at you, his mouth hanging open, as if hypnotized. His gaze shifted from one side to the other without blinking.

Tilting your head, you ran your fingers over the fabric. His eyes, glued to her hand, followed her every movement, as the tips of his fingers traveled along the area of ​​the cleavage from top to bottom.

Your smiling face appeared on the screen again. Confused by what he saw, Xavier didn't blink for a few more seconds. He quickly regained consciousness, shaking his head and getting out of bed.

— I'll be there soon, – he said and was about to end the call, but suddenly your voice made him stop.

— No, Xavier, wait! – giggling, you saw his puzzled expression again.

— Huh? – he asked, stopping and looking at the screen.

— You're not going anywhere, do you understand? – covering your eyes, you stretched out your hand behind the frame and a second later a glass of red wine touched your lips. - You stay at home.

— In what sense is this? – he asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise.

Now you had to endure his "puppy" look, which he constantly used on you to get what he wanted. His funny expression warmed your heart, making you smile again.

— I want us to talk to you like this, – you answered, watching his eyebrows furrow in confusion.

The main thing is to endure it.

— Why? Don't you want to be with me? Did I do something wrong? – he bombarded you with his questions while a worried expression appeared on his face.

— No, Xavie, – shaking your head, you took another sip of wine from the glass.

Out of the corner of your eye, you see him silently watching you, waiting for an explanation. Teasing him like this was both fun and cruel at the same time, but you wanted to try something new with him and video call sex was the best way to do it.

— Xavie, go back to bed, please, – you said, licking your alcohol-moistened lips.

— W-why?

— Just go back...

Still staring at the screen, Xavier walked over to the bed and sat on it, holding out his hand, showing that he had complied with your request.

— Good boy, – teasing him, you noticed how his ears were slowly turning red as he stared intently into your face.

— Is this some new game of yours? – he asked hoarsely.

— Yes, and I think you'll like it, – nodding your head, you leaned back on your bed.

— I don't think I'd like it more than being next to you right now, – his eyebrows barely rose and with a slight nod, he showed his "puppy" look.

This made you bite your lip and you felt a faint pulsation down in your panties. Breathing in intermittently, your eyes narrowed.

— What would you do then if you were here now? – after asking him this, your hand, as if by accident, touched your neck and slowly went down, touching the nipple with your fingertips and disappeared behind the frame below.

Xavier watched her move carefully and his head seemed to twitch slightly as the hand disappeared from the screen. Still looking at you, he exhaled heavily and slowly raised his gaze to your face.

— What would I do? – he asked thoughtfully, looking away for a few seconds, looking at an unknown point.

— Yes, – you answered playfully, your hand raised the phone higher, already showing your stomach, keeping the lower part of your underwear a secret.

When Xavier's gaze returned to the screen again, he froze. He could clearly see your hand reaching down and disappearing off the screen, in the area of ​​your panties.

— Please... Let me come, – he asked, imagining how your fingers touch your pussy.

— No, Xavie, you can only watch me, – answered, you raised your hand to your lips and, licking the tips of your fingers, lowered your hand down again.

There was a soft whimper from the phone.

— What it was? – you asked playfully, biting your lip and looking at his excited face.

He really was like a dog who was being teased with his favorite toy and not allowed to play with it.

— Please… – whining again, he brought the phone closer to his face, looking into your every curve, every hollow, every protrusion. – I want... I want to be next to you now...

— You didn't answer my question, so… — you brought the camera closer to your face, punishing him for disobedience.

— No, no, no! No need! Bring it back! – he protested when the sight of your breasts, your tummy disappeared from the screen. – I’ll answer, just return...

— Hm... Maybe I'll have to finish the challenge after all and spend this time alone? – you continued to tease him.

— No! Wait! Please, please! I-I... I'll do anything you want!

You arched your eyebrows in surprise. For the first time you see him so confused, excited and "hungry".

— Do you promise?

— I promise, my little star, – he confidently nodded his head, and his expression returned to its usual expression.

— Then tell me, what would you do with me now? – still holding the camera to your face, you eagerly awaited his answer.

— If I had the chance to be around you, the first thing I would do is take your phone out of your hands so they only hold me, – Xavier said confidently, looking into your eyes. – Then, I would examine every centimeter of your beautiful body, I would truly appreciate how beautiful your underwear is now...

His voice, the words he spoke, caused a soft moan to escape your lips, but you continued to listen to him with interest. Xavier's eyes wandered over you as if you could disappear from his life at any moment, dissolve into thin air and this was his only chance to remember every feature of your face, imprinting it in his memory.

— I would give you the sweetest kisses I could, every centimeter of your face, arms, legs, body... There wouldn't be a place left that my lips wouldn't touch.

— You're so damn naughty when you say things like that, Xavier! – blushing, you laughed quietly and put the phone with the camera on your stomach, feeling how your heart rate quickened.

A soft exhalation, full of desire, came from the phone.

— My lil’ star… – his voice was heard again, so quiet and calm, as if nothing had happened between them until that moment. – Let at least my eyes enjoy you, if I am not able to do it myself.

Biting your lip, you still picked up the phone and saw your boyfriend again on the screen. His gaze brightened considerably.

— ... Okay, – you said quietly, and you felt your ears burning. – Continue, please.

— I would take your underwear off because I don't want anything else to touch your body other than my lips or my hands, – he said as casually as if you had asked him about the weather outside the window.

Squealing, you were once again surprised by what a wolf in sheep's clothing he was. How could he say something like that with that facial expression and intonation? Madness.

You felt the heat on your cheeks and decided to hide it by lowering the camera down. Biting the tip of your free hand, you turned your head away, not wanting to look at the screen so as not to embarrass yourself even more.

There was silence for a few seconds and, surprised by this, you still turn your gaze back to the phone. You see that your body is clearly visible in the frame: from your tight and juicy breasts, to the bottom of your stomach, to the place where Xavier loved to be so madly.

Covering your mouth with your hand, you held your breath. It was all in his eyes. In the look in which you saw his desire, his need, his warmth and love for you.

You could feel his ghostly touches, his hot kisses on your skin. Your body reacted treacherously to your thoughts and arching over, you saw your hips squeeze together, hiding your pussy from his view.

He never uttered a single word. You could just hear his heavy breathing on the other side of the screen.

— Xavier? – you called quietly, bringing him out of his trance.

— Star? Damn... – the same "puppy" look appeared on his face again. – Just look at what you have done.

You brought the phone closer to your face to see better and let out a soft moan as Xavier showed you how he was now spread out on the bed in his usual pajamas. The main focus he was pointing to was bulging in his groin area. He made several movements of his hips, imitating such familiar movements for you.

You felt a heat in the lower part of your stomach, which spread throughout your body and caused tremors in your limbs.

— Why are your hands shaking, lil’ star? – Xavier asked, slowly turning the phone to his face.

— Oh, you… – you whispered, holding back a moan. – This is my game and I want to play with you!

His laughter came from the speaker of the phone. So warm and dear to your ears that you could hardly resist inviting him to your place. No, you have to be patient.

— You wanted this yourself, didn't you? Who will take responsibility for their actions? – he asked in such a tone, as if he, the poor pet, had been thrown out into the street by his own owners.

— Xavie! – burst from your lips along with a short laugh. – Stop teasing me like that.

— It's not me, – shaking his head, he continued to look intently at your face. – Should I continue?

— Yes, – nodding, you sat on the bed and took a glass of wine and took a sip.

— I don't like that your lips are touching this cold glass, and not mine, – he said calmly, but these words sent shivers down your body.

You both knew very well what exactly mean these words. Your heart skipped a few beats.

— I would like them to touch me… – continued Xavier in his husky voice. – So warm and humid.

A low moan and a rustling off-frame reached your ears. Intrigued, you wanted to know what he was doing.

— Xavie, what are those sounds? – you purred, looking into his face.

— I don't understand what you're talking about, lil’ star, – he sneered, lifting the corner of his lips upwards.

He deliberately held the phone so that you could see his face and part of his shoulder. His gaze began to linger on something off-frame and as he returned to you, it seemed to darken even more with his lust.

Puzzles went through your head when you heard the rustling and his muffled moan again. Your mouth dropped open in surprise and curiosity. This scoundrel, who at first glance seemed like an untouchable angel, was in fact a demon, and what he was doing now off-screen confirmed this opinion.

A need was felt inside your womb. The body remembered Xavier and that made you even more confused. Blushing, you looked away, which your boyfriend soon noticed.

- Lil’ star? – he asked gently, tilting his head.

— I have a little problem here... – Your voice was low and the sight of you pouting your lips made Xavier's eyes widen again.

— What happened?

Without answering, you changed your position on the bed and spread your legs, placing the phone so that the camera was pointed at your pussy.

The muffled moan from the phone was heard again. Xavier was looking at your cunt through the mesh fabric of your panties, watching your own lustful secretions run down you.

- Damn... lil’ star... You have no idea how hungry I’m right now, - he moaned, licking his lips with his tongue. – I’m very hungry.

You could clearly feel the mood in his voice. Although he was saying something relatively sweet, something else came to your mind. You could literally feel his tongue on you, how he caressed you yesterday, how greedily his lips fell to your bosom, drinking every drop, how he licked his lips contentedly, like this now. How a satisfied smile appeared on his face wet from your juices and how he looked at you with an even more predatory look.

From these memories you felt that you flowed even stronger. Xavier exhaled noisily and you heard the rustle again.

Unable to restrain yourself, your hand skimmed over your breasts and went down, deftly climbing into your panties.

— Star… – whispered Xavier, covering his eyes.

Watching his camera shake, you moaned softly as your fingers brushed against the wet pussy. Their tips began to smear your perineal discharge with a light movement, moving up and down.

As the first moan left your lips, you also heard a raspy moan from the other side of the screen.

— I adore your pussy so much, I can to cum just watching what you're doing to yourself right now.

You took a more comfortable position on the bed for Xavier to see each one your movement. And he saw. His dark blue eyes watched your fingers as they circled around your clit and touched it causing you to shiver.

— Xavier…please…help me, – you whimpered, moving your hips, rubbing against your fingers.

— Help you, lil’ star? – breathing heavily, he put the phone on the pillow and, standing on top, looked directly into the camera.

The light from his table lamp gently touched his face. Whining, you nodded, holding the phone up. Now you could see each other as if you were actually in the same room right now.

— Then… – Xavier said in a hoarse voice, and this made you dizzy. – Enter yourself with your beautiful fingers...

The words seemed soft and pleading, but knowing his character made your body tremble even more. He didn't ask you to do it, he did ordered you do it. Keeping your gaze on his face, a moan escaped your mouth as first one of your fingers penetrated his hot bosom, followed by the other.

Your hand trembled, threatening to let go of the phone, but you only tightened your grip on it with your fingers.

— Xavier… – you moaned, arching your back as you started to move inside of you.

Propping himself up on the bed with one hand, Xavier let out a stifled groan. You could tell by the way he looked on your screen that his phone was lying in front of him, giving you a perfect view of your boyfriend.

You imagined yourself instead of the phone, how it bursts into your insides, how its head hits the cervix, and that made your heart beat even faster.

A memory flashed through your mind of you gently biting him as he pressed against your thighs, digging deeper inside you.

Groaning again, you arched over, closing your eyes for a few seconds.

— Move them slowly, star... Think about me and only about me, do you hear? – his voice was mixed with heavy and uneven breathing, wet slurps that you created together.

— I want your cock so badly right now… – a soft whisper left your lips and reached his ears, causing the veins on his arm to swell even more and his teeth to clench tightly.

— Fuck!... – he muttered, noticeably moving his other hand out of the frame. – Why can't I just take you and fuck you?

Your clouded gaze was directed at Xavier who was fucking his hand, imagining your wet insides as he leaned over the phone.

— Speed ​​up the pace... – he said in a hoarse and low voice.

— Ah, you're driving me crazy, Xavie… – Your hands became faster and the pad of your thumb touched your clit, stimulating it to make your body tremble even more.

— Then, we have it mutual, – with a barely perceptible smile, he closed his eyes, frowning his eyebrows. – Star, I want you so badly…

— Mh! – moaning, your body shuddered at his words. – Xavie... Please.. Keep talking...

In any other situation, Xavier would hardly have wanted to say much. He preferred action. Precise and confident.

But looking through the veiled eyelashes at your face, at the way you open your mouth in moans and especially at the way your breasts move in time with your movements, he could not ignore the desire of his lady.

— I want to feel your warmth, your heat, your moisture, how you squeeze me with your walls, how you moan in my ear, I want it all now, – his voice, hoarse with desire, found a response in your subconscious. – I want to fuck you until you lose consciousness, so that you cum again and again from my cock.

— Fuck, Xavier… Good.. So good… – you moaned, arching.

Your body began to tremble even more with each word he said, and a tight knot of tension tied inside you. Dangerously hot.

— I want your tight pussy to cum for me, lil’ star, – he hissed from the other side, quickening his pace.

— Not enough, – you whimpered, not feeling the same filling from your boyfriend's cock inside you. – I want your cock... F-fuck..

— Be a good girl and try harder, – groaning at the lust that was actively moving in his hand, Xavier closed his eyes, keeping your request to stay in bed in his head.

— Mhhh... – you moaned, writhing on the bed, penetrating your fingers deeper and deeper into you.

There was so much of your own discharge that your fingers were covered in it as you sloshed, making a mess on the bed. There was a muffled thump and you looked at the phone to see Xavier resting his palm on the wall.

Wave after wave you were covered with the inevitable orgasm that was about to descend on you like an avalanche.

— I can't take it anymore, – you whined, arching and moving your fingers faster.

— Cum for me, lil’ star, I want to see you cum, – Xavier said, sharing his girlfriend's desire.

Your heart was beating so hard in your chest that a vein in your neck popped as you threw it back, shuddering from the wave of pleasure.

Your walls squeezed your fingers, which made it difficult for you to move them each time. A moan stuck in your throat, unable to come out.

The hand was shaking, due to which the image on the screen became not clear, but Xavier's gaze still clearly saw how your hips trembled with orgasm, how more and more juice flowed out of you, and from this, with a soft growl, he himself reached the end .

Moving his hips, he thrust into his hand until a stream of hot, sticky cum shot out of him. A few drops hit the screen and camera, making the image blurry and pale. Breathing heavily, he collapsed onto the bed, feeling the results of his swinging at you running down his arm.

Unable to hold the phone, you set it aside, lying there with your eyes closed and trying to catch your breath. The body was still shaking, the remnants of the orgasm causing your womb to contract periodically.

— I love you, –  you whispered, licking your dry lips.

— I love you too, my little star… – replied Xavier, lying on the bed as well. – Can I come to you now?...

Your body twitched at his question. You felt a familiar pulsation inside again and looking at the ceiling, you smiled with satisfaction.

— I want to feel you inside me, – you replied and took the phone. – Waiting for you.

During that night, you came 3 more times because Xavier, full of burning lust for you, could not forget the sensations that covered him while you masturbated for him.

He fucked you with your face pressed against the bed then he leaned down to whisper in your ear.

— All the same, being inside you is much better and hotter, star.

[callmelittlesunshinefics]

Dancing On My Own (Gambit X Reader, Part One)

Alrighty folks, this was meant to be a quick fluffy one shot that keeps getting longer and more angsty and has been sitting in my drafts for entirely too long now. Still very much a WIP that will be continued this week or next, PG13 for the time being with potential to take a turn for spicy down the line :)

A/N: Some quick background, the reader (Y/N in fic, described with she/her pronouns) is based off of an OC I tend to pull out pretty frequently. Half human, half angel, displaced from their home universe and dropped into this one (in which Lucifer, the tv show, is also cannon because why not maybe do a crossover down the line?). Gambit x Reader is the main ship we're sailing towards, but there's definitely some Logan x Reader if you squint. OH and last last thing, there's a party and I'm shamelessly linking the dress I had in mind for the reader here.

gif credit :) : @counterspelling

Dropping below a read more, don't be shy, come say hi when you're done reading! :)

“‘Stay for the summer!’ they said, ‘quiet and relaxing’ they said!” You throw the words you were told back at Jubilee who looks back at you completely unfazed as you continue untangling string lights to hang in the garden. 

“Honestly Y/N if you had stopped for two seconds to think about who was telling you that, you probably would’ve gone back to LA.” 

She was completely right, of course. You showed up to Xavier’s school not a mutant, not fully human either, and just looking for a place on the east coast to stay. Your uncle Lucifer made a few calls, found a friend willing to host a universe-displaced nephilim, and the rest was history. You might not be a mutant, but you were a partial human with powers you couldn’t always understand, and even other angels in this universe weren’t always able to help. Charles met and understood you quicker than anyone you’ve ever encountered in this universe or the next, so when you were asked to extend your stay and take on some guardian duties over the summer you were happy enough to agree. 

“Jean is the one who told you it would be relaxing, and Jean’s idea of relaxing is staying at a constant level 8 of activity.” 

“How is that not like the school year?” You rolled your eyes, dropping the lights. 

“Well during the school year she bounces between a 9 and 10, reserving 7s and 8s for the weekend. I can make you a diagram or something if you need it.” 

“I’m going to need a lot more than that by the time we’re done here.” 

“Maybe Gambit can help you with that?” Remy had sauntered over from the basketball court, at least that’s what you assumed given his current state of undress. 

“Unless you’re here to help decorate, I don’t think so handsome. If Jean catches us behind schedule the phoenix might make a reappearance…” You looked around and took a deep breath, realizing that other than the lights, everything looked pretty set. There was a reasonable sized clearing in the garden and Jean had hired a company to install a temporary dance floor. Chairs and tables were scattered around picnic style, and Jubilee had done an amazing job of setting up the bar despite being the only one unable to drink, legally.

“I think it’s actually just the lights,” Jubilee nodded to the messy pile at your feet, “And I think Gambit would be more help with that than me anyway, so?” 

“Go ahead,” you nodded smiling and she ran over to hug you, “And if you go to the mall, bring me back a pretzel!!!” You yelled after her knowing it was useless, she’d bring you a pretzel whether she heard you or not. 

“Avoiding me, chere?” Gambit eyed you with his usual flirtatious undertone that you couldn’t make heads or tails of. 

“In fact, I am. Grab that end?” You handed him the lights as he waited for an explanation, “Okay, I’m going to sit in the tree, I just need you to feed me the lights as we move. Ready?” You didn’t give him a chance to answer, disappearing and reappearing in the branch just above his head. 

Gambit stared back troubled and suspicious, so you nodded and gave him the sarcastic, albeit not entirely untrue, answer he was waiting for, “Oh Remy my attraction to you is just so strong and all consuming that I had to avoid you in order to get anything done at all. Every second I can’t throw myself at you is torture. Et cetera, et cetera, please start passing me the lights so I can go inside and shower.” 

He laughed and finally did as you said, “You know if you wanted ol’Gambit all you had to do was ask.” 

The two of you worked in a comfortable silence passing the lights through the trees. Just as you finished wrapping the last string, your footing slipped and you let out a quick yelp before bracing yourself for a fall that never came. 

“I never would have guessed angels could be so clumsy.” 

“If we weren’t you’d be short of a pickup line. Tell me honestly, how many times have you asked a lady if she fell from heaven?” Remy laughed and began walking away with you still in his arms. 

“Not as many as you think, chere. Are we about done out here?” 

You looked around and nodded, “Finally, yes. It was a good catch by the way, but I think I can walk on my own.” 

Placing you back on the ground, the two of you walked towards the mansion in another comfortable silence. Remy was probably tied with Jubilee as your closest friend in the school. You could remember the first day you arrived, how he couldn’t stop watching you. It wasn’t until later that same night, you were out in the garden and could still sense him watching you, that you decided to do something about it. You walked right up to him, introduced yourself, and asked him to kindly explain why he was staring at you like he’s seeing a ghost. 

It turned out the boy who grew up being told he was a demon had a lot of mixed feelings discovering angels and demons were not only real, but one of them was living under his roof. Remy felt a bit silly admitting it to you, but he owed you an honest answer when you confronted him so directly. And when he told you what people had said about him, what he suspected his own parents must have thought of him, your heart broke. You told him stories of all the demons and monsters you’ve encountered, and reassured him that he didn’t come close to fitting the bill.

“What’s on your mind, Remy?” There was quiet and then there was Quiet. You were still pretty new, but you knew well enough when something was bothering him.   

“Are you heading back?” You stopped short, and he stopped to face you. 

“Back where, Rem?” 

“Anywhere that’s not here.” He was facing you but he wouldn’t quite look at you, as if he didn’t actually want to hear the answer.

You took a deep breath, “The honest answer is that I don’t know. I don’t really feel like LA is where I belong, but I’m not a mutant or a gifted youngster either. I mean, I’m not even from this u-” 

“Okay, okay.” Gambit interrupted you with a hug, correctly sensing an impending panic attack from you, “Gambit just worried he won’t get to see you s’all.” 

You took a deep breath, sighing into the hug, “Well that’s really stupid.”  He pulled back to look at you, full of confusion. “It’s really stupid because if I were going anywhere you’d be the first person I tell, and because it takes me about 5 seconds flat to get anywhere. I’d be back before you even knew I was gone.”

You smiled wistfully and he returned it, “I’d know.” 

The two of you continued heading in and you finally felt brave enough to ask the question you’ve really been wanting to ask. 

“Well, I have to head up and start getting ready for tonight. What about you, getting ready for your date?” Of course, you weren’t sure he actually had one, but that was as direct as you could bring yourself to be. 

“Suppose I should be doing the same. Save Gambit a dance?” He kissed your hand and walked away, leaving you flustered and confused. You immediately pulled out your phone.

Y/N: okay so i said ‘gotta go get ready! what about you, getting ready for your date?’ and he said ‘suppose i should do the same’ what do we do with that??

JB: does he think you have a date?? 

Y/N: SHOULD i have a date??? 

JB: yeah, one of you should have asked the other out by now 

You dropped your phone on your bed, having finally made it to your room after a flurry of texts. Complicated feelings for your maybe best friend aside, it was still important to you to be slightly better than presentable tonight. 

Tonight was the first time all summer the adults of the mansion could relax and have a good time, and some non-residential mutants would also be joining the mix. You had never really been to anything so strictly social with the gang, and you didn’t take your invitation lightly. 

It wasn’t exactly formal, but Jubilee was able to confirm your suspicion that it wasn’t exactly casual either. You showered, taking more time than usual to exfoliate and moisturize, trying to pamper yourself into relaxing and getting excited for the night ahead, trying to ignore Remy’s words from earlier bouncing around your head. 

Two simple words that have had you in a tailspin since he said them so casually. ‘I’d know.’

The trouble maker in you wanted to test him on it, and you did a quick assessment of yourself to see if you could. Fresh out of the shower but mostly dressed, you were presentable. Should you take a quick trip overseas, hop over to France for some wine for tonight and back in a blink? You closed your eyes and heard a knock on your door just as you were about to take off. 

You opened your door more suspicious than you’d care to admit, suddenly paranoid that Gambit sniffed you out, but you were met with Jubilee instead, weighed down with garment and shopping bags from the mall. 

“You never answered me! I have your pretzel and you promised we’d do makeup together so-“ it was all the preamble she gave before forcing the pretzel on you and making herself at home in your room. 

“I was showering! And I really thought you were going to be gone longer?” 

“I just had to pick up some stuff I ordered for tonight, plus giving you and Gambit some time to flirt didn’t seem like a bad thing.” 

You rolled your eyes, “We have banter, definitely, but I’m not sure I’d call it flirting. He flirts with everyone.” 

“So you realize that what he does with you is different?” She turns it on you but you’ve heard it before. 

“Yes, different as in he’s not interested!” 

Jubilee made a sound of frustration before giving up and asking for help with contour. You dropped the subject and fell back into your usual routine, an easy friendship that reminded you more of sisters than friends. You showed up at the mansion looking for a place to stay while you visited old haunts, and you made a friend in Jubilee who was willing to venture into those places with you, even if it meant confronting ghosts.

“Lucky for you I think I found the perfect way to test his level of interest. You didn’t pick out what you’re wearing yet, did you?” 

“Well yeah, I was just going to wear-” You started motioning to the dress you picked for tonight, but Jubilee was moving and cutting you off before you even finished.

“Okay so scrap that, I grabbed something for you at the mall,” she reached for one of the garment bags she had laid across your bed, “and if this doesn’t get a reaction out of him, I’m at a loss. What do you think?”

She unzipped the bag and your eyebrows flew up so fast you wondered if they were still there. It was hot pink, sequined, and most noticeably, short and backless. You reached out to touch it and couldn’t deny how beautiful it was. Sure, the pink was a lot and it showed more skin than you were strictly comfortable with, but you couldn’t deny that the striped details of the sequins were gorgeous, or that the dress would hug and accentuate your curves…dangerously. 

“Now tell me what’s really going on because there’s no way you were able to afford this dress.” 

Jubilee snorted, “You got me, it comes with a letter.” She handed you a small envelope you promptly opened and started reading. 

‘Your young friend told me you planned to attend a party wearing some frumpy thing off a rack and that’s simply unacceptable for my niece, I have a reputation to uphold, Y/N ;) Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! Sincerely, your Fairy DevilFather (p.s. TRY to have fun?)’

“Lucifer intervened to send me a dress?? How did you two even contact each other?” 

“I answered your phone once when he called while you were showering. We really hit it off, he actually sent me one too!” She excitedly pulled out another bag and showed you an equally gorgeous, albeit much more modest dress. Part of you wanted to argue, but another part of you realized how exciting this was for your friend and you weren’t about to let her down when she was waiting for you to join her excitement. 

“I think we might be best dressed tonight?” You smirked and she whooped, celebrating her victory. 

“Oh I’m ready, maybe everyone will finally accept the fact that I’m 20 and stop treating me like I’m still 15.” 

You knew it was a sore point for her, but you still smiled. The way all of the x-men treated Jubilee as their adopted child was something that endlessly warmed your heart, even if it frustrated your friend. The two of you took your time helping each other get your hair and makeup perfect before donning your dresses and leaving your bedroom, having already started to hear the arrival of a few guests and the slight murmur of conversation. 

You stopped just short of the stairs, turning to face Jubilee, “Don’t they say ‘fashionably late’ is a good thing?” Your anxiety was starting to get the best of you, wearing such a risque dress to attend a party with lots of new faces. 

“I think we’ve already reached fashionably late, babe, if we wait any longer they’ll think something is wrong.” You took a deep breath and started to make your way down the stairs. The mansion was empty, signalling that everyone else had already made their way out to the garden. 

The sun was just beginning to set when the two of you arrived to find the party already in full swing. Jean and Scott were dancing, Logan and Hank sharing a drink by the bar, and around 20 faces you had never seen interspersed with the rest of the team. You heard a low wolf whistle behind you and felt a hand on your lower back. 

“Breaking hearts tonight, chere?” Remy was on you before you could even turn to look at the sound. 

“If I’m lucky.” You shrugged. 

“Think I have enough of that for the both of us.” He winked and you tried and failed to suppress a snort that only made him grin wider. 

You turned to say something to Jubilee and your eyes narrowed when you realized the little traitor had run over to greet her friends, leaving you and Gambit alone. She looked your way and winked as you openly glared at her. 

“Well it looks like I’ve been ditched so I’ll need to borrow some of it.” You grimaced in the direction of the crowd, not needing to elaborate.  

“All yours, chere.” He offered you his arm and you accepted, making your way into the party and jumping right into a flurry of introductions, hugs and handshakes that Remy led you through, guiding you away when it was time to move on. 

It seemed innocent enough but you couldn’t stop focusing on the fact that Remy’s hands never left you. Whether it was an arm wrapped protectively around your waist or his hand on your exposed lower back, lazily tracing shapes you couldn’t make out, it was becoming increasingly distracting. He introduced you to Kurt and you only caught 30% of the conversation, too distracted by Remy’s hand tracing the curve of the dip at the back of your dress. You were relieved when Remy excused the two of you to go grab a drink.

“Admit it, not as bad as you thought.” Gambit smirked at you, leading you to a table where Logan and Jubilee were catching up. 

You rolled your eyes, “I never thought it would be bad, I just,” You took a deep breath, “I don’t know, I guess I was worried I wouldn’t fit in here, or that everyone would be wondering why I’m even here but too polite to say anything.” 

Logan and Jubilee both looked in your direction, hearing the tail end of your conversation that you didn’t bother hiding from them. Logan very openly looked you up and down before chuckling and taking a sip of what you suspected to be whiskey. 

“No one’s kicking you out of here looking like that, that’s for sure.” It was maybe the first time the wolverine had ever given you a compliment and you blushed. 

“You clean up rather nicely yourself, Logan.” 

“Then why are you spending all night with the cajun instead of talking to me?” You were surprised but did your best to cover it up, meanwhile Jubilee was fighting off a laugh herself by taking a sip of her drink.

“Because the cajun knows how a lady should be treated.” Gambit grumbled, leveling Logan with a look before departing briefly to get the both of you drinks.  

“Does he?” Logan asked you while you sat to join them, shooting him a quizzical look before he continued, “Know how to treat a lady?” 

“How much have you had, Logan?” You asked, eyeing his drink. 

“Not that much, darlin’. Answer the question.” If there was one thing you loved about Logan it was his lack of bullshit, and judging by the look on Jubilee’s face as she waited for your answer, right now it was probably her favorite thing about him too, 

“He’s been a perfect gentleman, but we’re just friends.” You tried to say it in a way that wouldn’t reveal how much that bothered you, but both of them knew better. Gambit returned a second later with your drinks and you only got two sips in before Logan insisted on a round of shots. 

One round turned into two, turned into three, turned into…you lost count. Jubilee was swaying happily in her seat, having convinced the two men to let her join in with half shots somewhere around round three. Everyone’s judgement was impaired by that point, but she made a great argument about drinking for the first at home where she’s safe or something else you couldn’t remember anymore in your happily inebriated state.

A song came on and you gasped, turning towards the dancefloor and excitedly announcing your love for the song. What it was called? You couldn’t remember if your life depended on it, but you needed to dance. You locked eyes with Remy who smiled but shifted his eyes away awkwardly, causing you to quickly deflate. 

“Have you even had a dance yet tonight, Y/N?” Logan asked you suspiciously. 

“Not yet.” You pouted, considering heading out on your own, dance partner be damned. 

“Knows how to treat a lady my ass.” Logan grumbled in Gambit’s direction, shooting a glare at him before getting up and begrudgingly but kindly offering you his hand. 

“Oh. my. GOD.” Jubilee squealed, far too gone to contain her excitement at the drama, as she would say.  

You beamed at Logan, accepting his hand and making a run for the dance floor, pulling him along behind you. 

“That crazy cajun might try to take my head off later for this.” Logan grumbled, settling his arms at your waist while you threw yours around his neck, getting closer than was strictly necessary so the two of you could continue your talk while dancing. Your eyes shifted over to where you just left your friends and you felt a stabbing pain in your chest when you looked for Remy just to see he had also made his way over to the dance floor, with Rogue. 

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Logan.” Your eyes were starting to tear up and you looked up trying to stop it as Logan became worried, turning to figure out what made you so upset. His eyes landed on Gambit and he growled, holding you a little closer as he actively tried to calm down. 

“I’ll kill him.” 

“You won’t.” You laughed, “He’s allowed to be with whoever he wants.”

“Yeah, but he’s not allowed to follow you around all night like a lovesick puppy just to ditch you when he catches another scent.” 

You smiled sadly, “He was being a good friend earlier, that’s it.” 

Logan pulled you closer and leaned down to whisper in your ear, “I watched his hands stray all over you, Y/N,” He touched your bare back to emphasize his point, “He’s not a friend, he’s a coward.” You couldn’t take it anymore and hugged Logan, hiding your face in his chest to let a few tears escape, hoping you would feel a bit better if you could get some of your distress out. 

“Might have to kill em for making you cry.” Logan grumbled and you laughed, smiling up at him despite yourself. 

“Believe it or not you’re helping enough like this.” The two of you continued dancing and Logan’s discomfort wasn’t wasted on you, but he’d be damned if he let the two of you leave that dance floor before Gambit and Rogue. He was making a point. 

The music began to slow down and Rogue and Gambit finally went their separate ways. You watched as Remy found Jubilee again and made their way back over to the table, you turned to Logan.

“Think we should head back?” He looked behind you and shook his head.

“We finally get a song that’s more my speed and you want to leave?” He shook his head no and pulled you closer, making you laugh and rest your head on his chest as the two of you swayed lazily. 

“Thank you, Logan. It’s not how I expected the night to go but I wouldn’t have gotten through it without you.” 

“Dancing with you looking like that isn’t exactly a punishment.” He snarked and you chuckled.

“Mind if I cut in?” You looked up to meet red eyes, Remy looking between you and Logan harshly before addressing you again more quietly, “Didn’t Gambit ask you to save him a dance?” 

You hesitated and Logan took that as his cue, “Bad timing cajun, Y/N just said she was getting dizzy, we’re heading back to the table.” Logan put his arm around you and lead you out of there, leaving Gambit to grumble and trail the two of you back. 

Jean had joined Jubilee to rest and eyed the three of you quizzically as you made your return.

“Y/N!! I found out that shots of vodka with cranberry juice is amazing, look!” She held out a shot for you and you grabbed it and threw it back before Logan and Remy could even finish their protests.

“Chere! Didn’t you say you were dizzy?” Gambit took the shot glass out of your hand, leading you to a chair. 

“From the dancing, Rem! I definitely haven’t had enough to drink yet.” 

Jubilee whooped and passed you another shot, clinking it to her own before you both threw them back. Jean looked at you even more confused and you tapped your temple with a wink, an agreed upon gesture inviting her to read your mind. 

“Rough night but I promise everything is okay, just need to drown my sorrows a little with you guys. Logan’s been doing his best.” 

You heard Jean’s response in your head, “Fair enough. I’ve been cutting Jubilee’s shots with a lot of cranberry juice. Seriously, a LOT.” 

You struggled to mask your laugh, “As I was saying, definitely not enough to drink, I’m gonna go-“ You stood and made your way to the bar on your own before anyone else could say anything, but you could feel a few sets of eyes watching you leave. 

Someone had been manning the bar, but as the night wore on and the guests dwindled, those of you remaining were left to fend for yourself. You assessed your options and reached for the gin, giving that a generous pour before adding sprite, a splash of cranberry juice, and a lime wedge before you can talk yourself out of it. 

“That looks amazing, can you make me one too?” Jubilee had appeared at your side and you smiled before making her a much more restrained version of yours. “Now I need you to tell me eeeeevery detail of you and Wolvie dancing I mean I neeeever-“ 

“To be clear,” you interrupted, sipping at your drink, “It was a pity save when it became painfully obvious Remy wasn’t going to ask.” 

“After spending literally all night following you around and basically growling at anyone that tried to get near you, what’s up with that??” She made a good point but you weren’t sure what she meant by that first part. 

“Pause, rewind, what are you talking about ‘basically growling’?” 

“You seriously didn’t realize how handsy he got with you when Kurt started getting friendly?” 

You realized you were drunk when you couldn’t stop the words from coming out of your mouth, “I was so distracted by him being handsy I didn’t even hear whatever Kurt was saying to make the connection.” 

Jubilee nearly spat her drink in your face and she started smacking you excitedly, “Can you please please go tell him that??” 

“But then he didn’t ask me to dance!! He pointedly looked away!!” 

“So Logan? What happened there?” You were starting to suspect your friend wasn’t nearly as inebriated as you thought, her tone sounding surprisingly sharp shifting gears. 

“I really don’t think there’s anything more than his mother-hen instincts going on there.” 

Her eyes rolled and she shrugged, “I’d agree if it was just one dance, but-“ 

“Again, pretty sure that was to save me from being zeroed in on Gambit’s dance with Rogue..” 

She didn’t have a response for that one and she simply clinked your drink before you both took generous sips, “Don’t tell Jean.” You whispered as you topped both of your glasses off before heading back to the group.

Jean had left to track down Scott who was mingling in the small groups that remained, some still dancing but most everyone else was doing the same as your small group. Jubilee bounced into the seat next to Logan and you drifted a beat too long before sitting next to Gambit. The silence that stretched between the two of you was no longer as comfortable as it was earlier, so you broke and piped up first. 

“I almost tested you earlier, you know.” 

“Almost?” Remy squinted at you, “Been testing me all night, chere.” 

You narrowed your eyes back but decided not to engage, continuing your thought instead, “When you said you’d know if I left?” His playful glare dropped and he waited on your next words, “Just a quick trip before the party but still, decided against it.” 

Remy chewed on what you were saying and not saying, wondering how the night had gotten so far away from him. Everything started out better than he expected, getting to show you around the party, not letting you too far out of sight in that dress, and then the hesitation. His own doubt sneaking in, reminding him that Y/N is quite literally an angel, he knew her place in the world, but his? He looked over at you waiting for a response and decided that didn’t matter right now.

“Still have sea legs or are you about ready for that dance, chere?” He didn’t leave you much room to answer, already standing with his arm extended. 

“You know I literally just sat back down, right?” He rolled his eyes at you, grabbing your hand and pulling you to your feet alongside him. Your night was clearly nowhere near over and you gave in, letting Remy lead you back onto the dance floor and into his arms. 

[rawliverandgoronspice]

One thing that TotK does constantly but really doesn't land for me when compared to BotW is that every NPC loves Zelda so much.

She is the sweetest, and she loves animals and is the very best at them, and she goes to every major landmark to spend time there and also she teaches the people secrets about the lands they have always lived in and they're like woow thanks zelda incredible I'll change my entire ways because you were just SO enlightening (Lurelin + Gerudo Town feeling particularly questionable here for obvious reasons), and she's so wise and beloved and talented --to the point that nobody (beyond the Zora King) even dares to question her actions when she starts acting off.

(Yunobo please stop letting her walk all over you, like it's alarming that you understand she basically brainwashed you and your entire race, and you're still running after her like a lost puppy for an explanation that will surely make everything make sense instead of, like, punting her into the sun? I know it's the eeeevil zelda, but that this situation could even remotely begin to happen feels... so offputting.)

In BotW, the rare mentions of Zelda worked because 1) she was an ancient figure and the modern hylians knew very little about her and would build her up as a legendary figure accordingly, 2) she was literally giving her life for them (I mean she kind of still does here but people do not know that or cannot infer that in any way --which is its own sort of problem), 3) she was extremely hard on herself, felt like a failure and... kind of was one (and she was given shit for it).

(also in BotW we are in a post-Hyrule kingdom world, while here we're living its re-foundation, and so it feels very... convenient that they excavate a previous version of their perfect kingdom to boister up the hylian claim upon the lands also --but that's beyond the topic)

So for anyone to give her grace and compassion in BotW, while a little eyeroll worthy at times, was endearing and made sense. None of this was her fault; she may have extreme power, but she didn't directly yield it --her imperfections the byproduct of a stressful situation every champion was being forced into due to the tides of fate. Also the king was criticized for being a little ruthless and asking too much of his subjects, including his own daughter. There was solidarity between you and everyone else at the same level.

But here? I don't know, it feels like the entire kingdom is terrified that the sheikah secret police will drag them back in the Bottom of the Well if they breathe wrong when talking about their beloved princess, it's so unsettling. I liked BotW Zelda, but... I don't know, I'm literally more comfortable around fake Zelda than the real one. Fake Zelda feels more like a real person that she does.

[a-court-of-moonlight-and-ire]

Made it to chapter 16 today which means Feyre and I have both had our first impressions of Rhysand's Inner Circle and ohhhhhhh boy

Its hard to pinpoint why exactly, but theres something so discomforting about watching them interact. I think the main thing is that for all their "casual-ness", theres still clearly a rigid hierarchy between them and they all seem to 'know their place' so to speak, its not at all like Lucien and Tamlin's relationship in the first book which genuinely felt like a friendship that was unburdened by their status or positions. Like, theres this one moment where Mor and Amren are like kinda bickering with each other i guess, and Feyre remarks that Mor is probably super powerful if she dares talk back against Amren (in an incredibly minor matter Im pretty sure but I already forgor ngl) and because this is the book where Feyre's perspective starts being Objectively Correct all the time, I guess that's true, I guess the only reason someone would dare voice their opinion on something to this friend group is if they were physically more powerful because otherwise you just level a fucking mountain during an argument

Anyway, Im gonna switch topics for a short moment but I promise this diversion is relavant to the point above. So, sometimes when I go into the anti-tags on here looking for criticisms or complaints of the books, I instead find anti-ship posts that are mainly just about trash-talking some ship, mostly ones relating to that whole Elucien/Elriel/Gwynriel shipwar, which I already have thoughts on but I'll save those for later. In any case, one day I stumbled upon this pretty long anti-elriel post about how the gifts Elain gives Azriel on winter solstice arent actually cute and it describes how she gave him like, herbs that help with headaches "because his friends are always giving him headaches" apparently. And then that post went on a whole rant about how insensitive that was of her and that she doesnt actually understand Azriel's dynamic with his close friends, but honestly, judging from this chapter Elain was absolutely spot on

And I usually wouldn't say this because yknow, its only one chapter and we're probably gonna get the nuances of their relationship later, but this is a book written by Sarah J Maas, her characters and their relationships are rarely particularly deep and, more importantly, her writing is incredibly unsubtle. If Azriel was in any way fond of his friends shenaningans I wouldve noticed it, because Feyre wouldve noticed it like 15 times during that whole dinner. But she didnt.

Its especially bad for Cassian and Azriel because it feels like Cassian thinks they have this great rapport but Azriel just genuinely kinda dislikes him. Not to mention that whole fucking mess with Azriel and Mor and Cassian and Mor having sex so she wouldnt get married off or whatever, good god how is every conversation between them not insanely awkward

Even beyond that, idk man, theyre all just so insufferable. I dont understand how Amren, ancient eldritch being trapped in a fae body that she is, can stand to be around them, I wouldve left them 5 centuries ago if I was her. I guess the explanation is that she finds the government position interesting but its like, youre SECOND to the most boring and annoying man on the planet only kinda ruling over a court that you dont even actually care about from everything Ive heard. Again, if I was in Amren's position I would not be hanging out in an APARTMENT in a boring ass city at the behest of a quartett of stupid bozos, I wouldve weaseled my way into being the personal advisor of Beron or some shit so I could watch the Vanserra Family Drama unfold live

There was one good thing about this discomforting dinner though, and that was how inexplicably gay Cassian was for Rhysand. He was really out there, looking at him with such love, calling him pretty twice in like two minutes being all "I knew I wanted a piece of him the moment I first saw him, the high lord's pretty son" like okay. I know what you are

[camillesblogsposts]

Say yes to me- four (1/2)

Half a chapter!! Sorry if this is annoying but just wanted to do it this way lol. Second part out tomorrow! Hope you enjoy babas!! @blairfox04 @lostcasefile @kyleeservopoulos @cursedpixie @ellieinmybed @intrnetdoll @frasersgf @alanahendrix @experiencebeinanamericanwh0re @ariianelle @nil-eena @spidersammy @starhrtz

Cat sort of stood there in the doorway for a moment, she looked stunned, not really knowing what to do. There was no average explanation for why Ellie was kneeled on the floor before you looking at you so gently. Her gaze was so soft, all she could see was you. Cat almost thought it was some sort of paranoia induced delusion. When the two of you noticed her there you froze up, clasping your hands together protectively. Ellie didn’t look away from your face, she looked dazed.

“What’s going on?” Cat asked, breaking the silence. Ellie stood a little stiffly, flushed. “Why do you need to know?” She grumbled, her hand raising to her neck. She had a tendency to do that when she felt awkward. “I tripped over, Ellie was checking if my ankle was okay.” You didn’t know why you said this, the words sort of just leaving your mouth. Subconsciously, you didn’t want to hurt Cat’s feelings. Ellie glanced back at you and she looked a little upset, you didn’t understand why. Her face was all scrunched up again, she left the room without another word. Cat stayed there at your doorframe waiting until Ellie was out of ear shot.

“Are you telling me the truth?” She asked, arms crossed over her chest.

You nodded. Cat didn’t respond, turning to follow after Ellie. You got into bed and tried to fall asleep.

You didn’t know how long you had been asleep when you were woken up, hearing your name being whispered beside you. It was Ellie, you knew before you opened your eyes. The room was dark now, only the moonlight streaming in through your sheer curtains. It illuminated her face in soft lighting. She looked gentle, once again knelt down to be at your level.

“Hi.” You whispered, pulling up the blankets to cover your face. Everything had happened so so fast: what if Ellie was here now to tell you she wasn’t attracted to you, that she hated you. She reached out and pulled down your blanket so that she could see your eyes, you went flaccid, letting her. Just looking up at her with big puppy eyes.

“Just… wanted to be able to talk to you, before I go home.” She whispered back, voice rough. She sounded sleepy. You wanted to invite her into your bed and hold her. You nodded, waiting for her to continue.

“Um, about what you said.”

“Which part?” Your voice was quiet and uncertain. You were so nervous. Despite imagining this happening to you every day since you were fourteen you still weren’t prepared for it.

“Bout’ being like the girls.. the girls in the book.” She looked away, Ellie was embarrassed. You wanted to kiss her so badly.

“Yeah?”

“You can um, come over to mine tomorrow after patrols.” She coughed before saying this, wanting her voice to be clear. You felt your face flush. Slowly, you nodded.

“I’m gonna need to hear some verbal confirmation on that.” She said sarcastically, standing up. You thought about how helpless you are against her, how tall and strong she looked when you were laid beneath her. Your heart was humming.

“Y-yes please, if that’s okay.”

Ellie smirked. She paused for a moment. “Y’know, I’ve always thought that sweet little thing was an act but you’re just… like that.” She was teasing but something about the way she said it told you that she was being honest. That upset you a little, feeling sorrowful for your past self, all of the times Ellie had pushed you away.

“All I’ve ever wanted to do is make you happier.” You had wanted it to sound assertive but it came out as a sort of sleepy whine, your eyes all blurry. Ellie laughed a little under her breath. “It makes me happy to see you… safe.” You didn’t know what she meant by that but you nodded nonetheless. It made you feel warm inside. You didn’t know that Ellie had such complex thoughts towards you.

“Im gonna go, Cat will be looking for me.” She smiled a little before turning to leave. You sat up, “Are you sleeping with her?” You asked quickly, desperate to know. Ellie’s mouth fell open slightly, confused. “Uh.. no? Not since we were together.” She seemed a little offended at the question. You felt immediate relief and then a little wounded, why would Cat have lied to you about that? You nodded to Ellie, smiling again. You didn’t want her to remember that as the last thing you spoke about.

“G’night Ells, have the nicest dreams ever.” You yawned mid sentence, rubbing your eyes before lying back down to go to sleep. Ellie left your house feeling rejuvenated. You were so close to her. She’d been so close to you. If she had tried to kiss you, you would’ve let her. She could see that now. She cursed herself for all the wasted time.

The next day you had an increasing anxiety in your tummy. You were going to Ellie’s house after patrols. You were so so so nervous. What if she turned you away at the door? What if she’d just invited you over for a movie and you were completely misunderstanding her? What if she didn’t actually like you, she just wanted to fuck you?

You tidied the house and cleaned, Cat never really contributing. You didn’t mind it. You pretended you were Ellie’s housewife. You made cookies to take to her house once she got home from patrols. You opened your stall in the market at 12, selling some body washes and soaps and cleaning supplies. Your days were slow but comfortable.

When it was time to get ready to go to Ellie’s you wore something comfy, baggy pants and a oversized jumper. You didn’t want her to think you were trying hard. You took the cookies in a little bag, your hair in two plaits. You had a little bit of your homemade berry stain on your cheeks and lips, lavender water as a perfume. You were so so so excited. You tried to remember everything Dina had told you about sleeping with girls, imagining how it would happen between you and Ellie. You’d do anything she asked. Anything, anything.

She greeted you at her door, looking around in a way to see if anybody had noticed you there. They hadn’t. She was dirty from patrols, dried blood and mud stuck to her skin and clothes. It was oddly attractive. She laid her hand on your back and pulled you inside, closing the door behind you. The two of you stood in her living room for a moment in silence, just observing each other. The air in the room was so thick.

“Hi.” You giggled, unable to stop your laugh from the anxiety that was coming from the both of you. Ellie smiled down at you, nervous and affectionate, “Hey.”

“I’m gonna have a shower, kay? Just keep yourself entertained.” She smirked, her hand hesitantly laying on the top of your head for a moment before she left to the bathroom. You sat on her couch, flicking through the films to put onto her tv.

You could hear the shower running, your blood running cold. You imagined what it would look like if you were in the bathroom; Ellie’s body. Toned and sweaty and blood stained. She was so lean and muscular, she was so beautiful. You felt yourself getting wet.

[artsyhamster]

And we've reached the end! I cannot believe we made it but here are the final four. :)

You know the drill by now, explanations and ramblings underneath the cut :D

(1) THE FOOL / THE MAGICIAN / THE HIGH PRIESTESS |

(2) THE EMPRESS / THE EMPEROR / THE HIEROPHANT |

(3) THE LOVERS / THE CHARIOT / STRENGTH |

(4) THE HERMIT / WHEEL OF FORTUNE / JUSTICE |

(5) THE HANGED MAND | DEATH | TEMPERANCE |

(6) THE DEVIL / THE TOWER / THE STAR |

(7) THE MOON / THE SUN / JUDGEMENT / THE WORLD

THE MOON - As I mentioned in the previous set, I had The Star and The Moon exchanged at first. Colorwise I found the Balcony Smoker to be more fitting but descriptionwise.... "[The fool's] bliss (...) makes him vulnerable to the illusions of the Moon" fit Klaasje more. I feel like Harry related to her on a level and of course was drawn to her beauty, and fell for her deception. Or well at least I did lol. Although I don't even want to call it deception, more like...obfuscation in self-defense. Klaasje on the rooftop staring at a moon seemed like a nice visual image too.

THE SUN - I had. So much trouble. Filling this role. Since The sun stands for everything warm and joyous. "It enlightens, so the Fool both feels and understands the goodness of the world." And it's pretty hard to find something joyous in Revachol. I almost chose Ruby just for the orange aesthetics and the sort of... enlightenment. But considering she might shoot herself in the head, I refused to put her in the role of the sun. I wanted to save the Insulidan phasmid for THE WORLD at first, but I am damn happy I let go of that thought. Especially since the story starts and begins with the fool anyway. SO YEAH. I love this stick bug.... I cannot describe it. After you go through this whole bleak game, filled with death, misery, failure and coldness you find this...walking wonder. And the soundtrack to this encapsulates it so well, too. The phasmid scene always fills me with so much happiness T_T

JUDGEMENT - Also one of the the cards that were pretty clear to me from the beginning. Trant looks pretty menacing here but I love it lol. I added a small Harry, because under the judging eyes of his colleagues, everyone would feel small. "The Fool has been reborn. His false, ego-self has been shed, allowing his radiant, true self to manifest." The radiance is debatable, but Harry definitely went through a lot of development in the past few days and hopefully he came out a better person. He isn't absolved of his past mistakes and further judged on those, rather he is judged on the things he did right. And I don't know, what I like about Harry in general is that he is an absolute fuckup but if you give a person the right support and faith in them to be better, they can. If you keep reminding people only of the things they've done wrong, you are taking their room to grow, by defining them as an irredeemable failure.

THE WORLD - "The Fool reenters the World, but this time with a more complete understanding. He has integrated all the disparate parts of himself and achieved wholeness. He has reached a new level of happiness and fulfillment." Well, what can I say. Our fool Harry started this journey full of ignorance but he opened his eyes to the mistakes of the past and learned from them, and is now hopefully ready to tackle life anew. And I love the last sentence of The Fool's story: This cycle is over, but, the Fool will never stop growing. Soon he will be ready to begin a new journey that will lead him to ever greater levels of understanding. While this chapter of his life is over, there'll be new stories to be told. Setbacks and more opportunities to grow, and only time will tell where his journey will lead him this time.

Thanks to everyone who followed me and Harry on this journey and read through my ramblings. Also thanks for all the lovely tags & comments, it was an absolute pleasure reading through these. <3 Much Love!

[imtheindiekid]

Sweet creature.

Prompt: Reader is the new resident at the Sonic Catering Institute run by the excentric Jan Stevens, the woman who sponsors her art and in exchange asks reader to become her lover.

Ship: Jan Stevens x fem!reader.

Warnings: FLUFF in caps, literally so much fluff and besotted reader (lol), pet names, Jan Stevens being the bundle of joy I know she is. Reader is not a minor! Kisses LOTS OF KISSES (bc you cannot tell me Jan is not a softie for giving and receiving smooches). Kisses as love language, mention of alternative food art but not really. Mostly reader and Jan being two fools in love.

A/N: Hello again! Here I come to fulfill my dream of Miss Jan Stevens having an affair with one of her residents (but a real relationship, we're a big no no when it comes to Billy Rubin and his lack of international love smh) So yeah, hope you enjoy! xo.

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Food it was always more than the simple sustain for life, or a way of living or making profit by creating meals to offer at a place. No, it was more than that when it came to you and food, almost like a deep connection to know more about it, your curious mind wandering trough the cook books and kitchens you had access to, always wanting to know why such bond held a very special place in your soul.

The only explanation you could give it was that the universe granted you this rare talent in order to pursue it, even at a young age.

Enjoying any kind of dinners was an experiencie, and everytime you did it never failed to feed the craviness of reaching new levels when it came to food. Almost like a miracle, you decided this uncertain but luring path was the one you needed to follow.

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It took some years and a great amount of failed plans, but you were finally happy at the way this whole thing of food music turned out, even when at an early stage of it people thought you went completely mad for creating art made by food that was not eatable at all. If they put it out like that it sounded crazy, but you knew they didn't understand, not even one bit.

Great thing you never cared for hearing others peoples opinions about you ditching college and embracing the alternative yet excentric art of sonic food catering, the one that made your heart fully happy. And so there you were, after small gatherings in cramped spaces, effort and love for this art carried you to the magnificent Sonic Catering Institute; a place where your ideas and wishes could rest easily and get sponsored by the right people. By her, and only her.

Jan Stevens was the woman you would never see at the street or a common place. You were sure she was a woman you would never see her at all, and yet, the only one if she randomly appeared behind an aisle at the supermarket or a the next table in a restaurant. The oddity about her and the looks she always wore were the whole essence why you reached for her, the reason why pleasing her was as important as creating your art.

She had you in a chokehold, your muse.

And of course, Jan Stevens knew the power she held on you as well the the love and praise that seemed to escape without shame from yourself when it came to her. It was adorable, seeing you so enamoured with her and always behaving like a puppy around her expensive dresses. She loved it, so much that it wasn't so long after you both came to an agreement; she would sponsor after the residency if you became her lover, stating that she could do international love and being thousands of miles apart wasn't a problem for her to keep loving you.

You sealed the agreement by kissing her so unexpectedly, making Jan Stevens smile.

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It had been two and a half months since your acceptance at the Sonic Catering Institute and one month since becoming Jan Stevens newest lover, and those were blissful days. Making art and sharing a compassionate love with a wonderful woman it was truly more than you have dreamed of.

A wonderful woman whom had her slender hand wrapped around your arm while taking a peaceful stroll with you through her mansion gardens. The day was beautiful and sunny enough to make both of you take a break from brainstorming ideas for the next gathering and soundchecking, so instead of spending the rest of the day in between the sheets, you and your lover went for some calmness at their favorite place.

"Look there my love, those flowers are blossoming today."

"They are indeed sweetling. Thriving and shining like you, Y/N."

A smile appeared in your face as soon you heard the soft voice praising you and comparing your success to the bush of flowers that bloomed so beautifuly that day; Jan Stevens never failed to burst love and adoration beneath your skin, with her words and pretty names she used to call you most of the time; she still had to maintain the façade of professionalism when it came to presentations or those dinner parties she threw occasionaly.

You didn't mind it though, that people weren't aware of your relationship, they had no right to know about it or think that you're only using Jan Stevens for getting her money. So therefore, it was kept secret in order to enjoy it in your way. In a few months, you would be pursuing the next phase of your art, and at that time the residency would be over; so no worry about secrecy.

But right now, strolling by the bushes and old trees with your excentric yet handsome lover, was more than enough to you.

"How can you say such things and not make me blush like a poppy?"

You asked, gazing at her and actually starting to look as red as a strawberry, which made Jan Stevens laugh softly and reach one of your cheeks with her free hand, caressing it. The mere action had you almost like a puddle, if you could actually turn into that, but it wasn't very practical if you thought about it.

"Because sweetling, I love the red flush that crawls through this beautiful face of yours. So beautiful and kissable and which I absolutely adore."

"Jan Stevens, please my peach!"

The blonde laughed again, finding cute the way you would turn bashful at the praise she threw at you. Having enough of standing up, Jan Stevens gently pulled at your arm and grabbed the skirt of her black and white dress, leading you both to a bench near the shadow of a big tree. There, you took a seat next to the older woman, careful of not stepping accidentally on her dress.

As soon you sat down, a couple of hands went straight at your face and turned you to look at your love, who was smiling before closing the gap between you two in a series of short kisses. You didn't waste anytime and found a place for your own hands in the waist of the blonde, tracing so slightly and lovely the curves of her body possesed.

The sound of hums tickled against your lips, making you smile at it and knowing that your beloved peach was really enjoying this demostration of love. It turns out Jan Stevens love language was mostly kisses, and she loved giving them to you or receiving them happily from you; the lipstick she used always got smeared in the corner of her plump lips while you ended with a face full of lipstick stains and a drunk in love face.

The range of her kisses would vary on the mood she was; sometimes, they were no more than a peck to remind you of their love. Other times, she would pin you against the matress and leave you breathless by how her kisses grow hotter and needier, this time reminding you of the power they held.

But the ones you loved were the ones that gave with such patience and grace, holding you as if you were a fragile and delicate thing. Those were the ones that gave you at the garden and you totally fell for it.

"Jan."

"Too tired to say my name, sugarplum?"

She whispered against your mouth, kissing you a couple of times before pulling out of the embrace, but not totally to be apart. Your eyes felt heavy and tired, but an enamoured smile was in that face of yours; the sight of you, fuzzy and high in love was endearing to Jan Stevens, who couldn't stop looking at you.

"Perhaps my lovely bunny would love to go and take a nap. Looks like someone's tired."

"Not tired, just simply love drunk thanks to you peach."

"You're always seem to be love drunk baby."

This time it was your turn to laugh at her response, squeezing gently her hips while a foolish grin appeared on your face. She was right of course, you were always love drunk and all because of her; of her captivating love she had in her soul. You simply rested your head in her shoulder, pulling her body close to yours.

Jan kept a hand on your flushed face, stroking your cheeks or playing with your hair, while the other one found a place in your lap. Silence filled the space rapidly at the absence of words, but it was okay; there were moments with such intimacy like this one that words didn't need to be said. Both of you just knew how much love was in between.

It didn't take long for Jan Stevens to kiss you, never having enough of your kisses which you gladly give. Pecks turned into sweet kisses that turned into a full make out session, suddenly initiating a fire in your lower abdomen and made you whine against Jan's lips; your hands gripped her hips while the elegants of your beloved traveled to your torso, teasing you so slightly.

Then, she drew out again and caused you to protest at the lack of her warm, but a finger was placed in your lips to silence you.

"No whining darling, and let's take this into bed."

The mention of laying with her instantly cheered you up, and also caused you to stand up to take her hand and pull her out of her seat. Amused and in love with your reaction, Jan Stevens followed you through the gardens and into her mansion, already looking foward for all of the things she plans to do with you.

Oh how she loved being the headmistress of a place like this. And how she loved you.

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The end. <3