#and my partner is streaming their dnd campaign

[damneddualities]

I’m just gonna vent because when I get this frustrated and stressed I go pretty much nonverbal but keeping it in doesn’t help either. Also I can’t afford therapy so Tumblr it is.

I recently adopted a cat to be my ESA as petting and cuddling with a cat has always helped calm me down and is almost stim like. I had to leave my elderly cat back home partially due to his age but also because my sister would have thrown a fit if I took MY cat with me down south while I was in school. Mind you she adopted a kitten a couple months ago. Part of the reason I did t fight it was because she also needs animals for emotional support. Yknow she has her dog but whatever I’ve mostly moved past that.

Last year I lost the last kitten I had adopted to the FVIP which is basically kitty COVID and has a 10% of becoming a neurological issue that is almost immediately fatal. My partner is living with me in our apartment while I finish up my last year of college. Before coming down my mom made them promise to not let me get a cat. Mind you she didn’t communicate this with me, my partner did. They have recognized however that our cat greatly improved my mental health and my stress based compolusions. However I have not told my mom yet about our cat.

This is for a few reasons. One being the aforementioned “promise”. Another is that I recently lost my job because I was apparently hired on as seasonal despite being hired before seasonal started. I still don’t have a job and it’s been almost a month. So my mom who is a co-signer on our lease has been helping with rent and groceries because inflation is a bitch on top of being without a job.

Mind you I only adopted this cat because I had gotten hired somewhere. Only to be immediately ghosted on when I would start (then never even sent me the onboarding information). So now I have no savings, no job income for at least another three weeks (working on getting hired somewhere else) and suddenly my cat is shitting blood.

Took her to the closest vet I could because I didn’t have money for a carrier yet. The internet and reviews said they were good and adorable. The first visit is even free! I get there and the tech that comes in immediately starts talking about money and cost. They barely even looked at my cat.

Anyway I explain what caused me to come in (part of it being trauma from suddenly losing my last cat) and they advise me that they’ll probably have to do blood work and give her meds and the price tag just keeps upping. I tell them the most I could possibly pay that day (as they didn’t have any payment plan options and my deductible on the pet insurance hadn’t been paid yet anyway) was $200

So the tech takes my baby back and I sit alone in that room for upwards of twenty minutes. When the tech comes back the vet is with him. She has a type of tapeworm-adjacent intestinal parasite. They tell me they’re putting her in three medications: a probiotic to help with the diarrhea, an antibiotic for the inflamed anus cussed by the excessive shitting (which was where the blood was coming from) and the meds for the parasite itself. Only the Rx for the parasite isn’t on hand and I have to order it through chewy. (So another $20-40. That prescription isn’t even expected to arrive before the 1st so it will have been a week since the appointment that the meds arrive. )The vet leaves and I pay the $147 (an extra $12 for the cardboard carrier they used) and go home.

The next day she is shitting everywhere with seemingly no control. Luckily we had quarantined her to the bathroom so our dog wouldn’t get infected from eating her poop. Now she has rectal incontinence from the parasites. And on top of that she’s bloated from it as well. None of these symptoms/side effects were things the vet told me to expect. So I’m panicking and thankfully was able to get in touch with a vet through online chat for free as I’d gone completely nonverbal in my panic and stress.

All this leads up to me having an emotional breakdown in bed the other night because one of the things I struggle the most with is feeling like a burden, especially a financial one. And I feel like an awful pet owner because our cat loves cuddles and being around the rest of us and now she’s quarantined in the bathroom and I can hear her meowing for attention that I can’t give her for longer than like five minutes.

My partner comforted me and helped me get out of my head and I finally felt like I was doing a bit better. Then my mom calls and because I was taking a depresso nap I didn’t answer so she texts the both of us. To my partner she texts her questions and to me I get the anxiety inducing “call your mother now” text.

I call her. Immediately I’m being berated for using DoorDash to buy McDonald’s the other day. Sorry my depression is chronic and makes it hard to find motivation to cook lunch let alone eat. Then she moves on to my use of Cashapp. A use which I’ve told her in the past it to get money into my own account through another bank which doesn’t have branches near where I’m currently living. Money which needs to be in there for my bills such as my medications and reoccurring subscriptions to be paid. Also it was how I was paying for the vet visit without her finding out I have a cat.

Yes I know I should tell her but I know that when I do it will be an endless barrage of how I don’t know how to save money or so finances and how I shouldn’t get an animal if I can’t afford it and basically implying that I am a financial burden. A concern I have shared with her in the past and she has assured me I’m not. She may say it but her actions and the way she talks to me say otherwise. And if I tell her I got it becuase I had been hired but then was unexpectedly ghosted she’ll give me shit about not confronting the people who “hired” me, knowing that I don’t do well with confrontations with authority and that I don’t communicate well when I’m upset or stressed.

She also started in on why the hell was I needing to take a nap. And rather than have to explain my mental disabilities ((adhd, chronic depression, anxiety (and undiagnosed autism)) tax on me physically I just told her I had a headache (another thing I deal with chronically). She immediately goes into well, and I quote, “prepare for the headache to get worse” and that’s when she starts laying in about the expenses on my account that she has access to. I’m fucking 25 I don’t want to be treated like a child who doesn’t realize how the world works.

Mind you this woman spent at least 2/3 of her teaching career working with disabled kids as a special needs teacher. But would she ever admit her own daughter is autistic and has periods of being nonverbal? No. And I learned not to rely on others because my older siblings always seemed to be of a higher priority growing up than I did. My middle sister is medically diagnosed as “mentally retarded” (yahoo /s for the medical industry 30+ years ago not knowing what the term developmentally delayed is -_-) so she was mentally younger than I was by the type I was ten. My oldest sister is practically a narcissist who I was constantly compared to and I saw how she took advantage of my mom financially (she’s 35+ and has a well laying career but my mom is still the one paying her student loans).

This has probably made no sense and is all over the place but I’m too tired to edit it to be more cohesive and I warned y’all it was a rant. I’m just tired of being treated like an idiot and a burden. Not to even mention the fact that I’m supposed to have access to the money my grandfather set aside for me in a trust (RIP Popop) but my mom won’t confront her younger sister about why she hasn’t handled it yet. Which brings up my partners concern that if the trust wasn’t set up before my grandfather death and is only stipulated in the will then my aunt as the executor can just say fuck you to all of us and keep everything for herself. With her being the most well off out of all of us.

My Popop vaguely told me about this money before he passed because he saw how the world was going financially. He knew I would struggle as the youngest. My middle sister will likely always live with my parents. My eldest sister is married with kids and has a well paying career and owns a home. I’m relying on grants and scholarships and federal loans to pay for college and worked (including my schooling, and my internship) over 75 hours a week last semester just to get by. Plus I know that when my parents go I will be responsible for my middle sister. We do not get along. She resents me for not having the same difficulties as her and for having thing she doesn’t as her younger sister. But my narcissistic eldest sister is a fucking cunt who would probably just blatantly refuse to help out. So I get to be implied to be a burden who is incapable of managing their own money while also being blasted with the pressure of knowing that should anything happen to my parents I will become responsible for my middle sister.

TLDR: moms are fucking nosy and incredibly ableist despite being a former special needs teacher who’s students still remember and send her gifts and I’m out of a job with a shit ton of sudden expenses

If you’d like to help out my Cashapp and Venmo are both lexmars42 and you could even buy something from my redbubble (same as my tumblr handle). Literally a fucking dollar or two would be appreciated.

[meanbossart]

Pin!

Hi, I'm RJ (Male, 27 years old) I'm a -usually- horror oriented artist and collaborator alongside my partner and better-half @barbatusart, though I'm currently on a Baldur's Gate 3/DnD streak with both my art and writing, specifically centered around the Dark Urge I created for my campaign and his antics, so that's most of what you will find here!

I want to leave a warning right here that I occasionally venture into delicate topics in regards to character lore and history - though none of it strays too far from what the game already delves into and I try to give a heads-up ahead of time whenever I feel like something might catch someone off-guard otherwise.

PATREON WHERE I POST WIPS, SKETCHES, UNRELEASED ART, ALL OF MY NSFW CONTENT, ETC : patreon.com/meanbossart/

BLUESKY WHERE I PUT UP FULL VERSIONS OF *SOME* OF THE NSFW THAT I CAN'T POST HERE: bsky.app/profile/meanbossart.bsky.social

TWITCH WHERE I STREAM SOMETIMES: twitch.tv/meanboss14

PSA: I get a lot of asks and I'm slow to go through them, please don't take it personally :U

Anyway, here's the guy of the hour:

🚨FAQ BELOW🚨

Q: Does your Durge have a name? A: Nope! I named him "drow" when I played the game because I didn't feel like thinking up anything special. His lack of a name has become part of the character's lore and you will find him to always be tagged with "DU drow", or referred to as The Drow or just Drow.

Q: Where can I read your BG3 fan-fiction? And what is it about? A: Right here! The main plot follows DU Drow, Astarion, and Shadowheart on a new adventure that fractures into a couple of different directions, but mainly focuses on the aftermath of the spawn that Astarion has released and the personal development of the main cast, alongside a number of original characters that get involved in the narrative. My goal was to create a kind of "DLC" experience, so you can expect a lot of themes that parallel the main game.

Q: Can I draw one of your characters, a scene from your story, or any of your characters interacting with mine/other characters? And can it be NSFW in nature? A: YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN, AND I'LL BE DELIGHTED TO SEE IT IF YOU CARE TO SHARE. I'm equally fine with NSFW as long as everyone involved (in the art and otherwise) is an adult.

Q: What drawing software/tablet/brushes do you use? A: I draw on a Wacom Cintiq 22, using Clip Studio Pro. I switch around brushes quite often but most of what I use comes from the DAUB super-bundle by Paolo Limoncelli.

Q: Where can I find more of your work? A: You can find mine and my partner's comics here, but please bear in mind that most of it is highly violent stuff and you should read the content warnings on the store page carefully before making any purchases - if in doubt of whether or not any of it could be detrimental to your mental health, DON'T BUY IT. Stay safe!

Q: Do you take commissions? A: I am not currently taking any new commission inquiries, sorry!

[syrips]

hello im gonna pin this post

hello my name is Syrips, im a super duper simp and simp/self-insert enabler for others who love strahd or any cos/ravenloft/fictional characters

im 28, but i sometimes say im thirty as a vague response because its easier and faster to say (or safer to say to strangers)

i think i am autistic but i am currently only self-diagnosed; i plan to tell my doctors once i compile a binder of reasons why i think im autistic based on noted events in my childhood, behavior, and my reflected perspective on things in pages of charts and text which is a totally neurotypical thing to do

im genderfluid and i am fine with any and all pronouns (different people may use different/changing/fluid pronouns on me, i am completely fine with this)

im polyamorous and pansexual/panromantic, i gush over games that have polyamory/pan options!!

i have huge CoS/Ravenloft spoilers so please, PLEASe do not enter unless you are fine with being spoiled with all kinds of content. i also wont explain what is or isnt 'canon' because, well, some things may be canon for one person, while potential/not-canon for another, so i really cannot confirm or deny it myself.. ask your DM for confirmation! (and for my players who are here, hehe, goodluck figuring it out!)

i do music, art, crafting, and streaming sometimes, here is my linktree: https://linktr.ee/syrips

please 'ask'/message/send me any and all of your curse of strahd and/or ravenloft works of art! this can include these and more!:

playlists

moodboards

art/portfolio/link to your art or artblog

pages of your OC/PC/dnd lore (both player and DM welcome)

campaign/session notes and storytime

canon and potential-/home-/head-canon dumps

narrations/imagines/ao3/google docs/fanfic/fic writings

cool crafts!!

i crave it more than strahd craves blood, please and thank you!

you can also send me stuff and let me know if you want me to gush/simp over it, provide advice, or simply acknowledge it (publicly or privately)! let me know in advance cuz i dont want to make you uncomfortable with what you share

i have no limits on triggering fictional content, just make sure to tw it properly if it is sensitive content for others

my Ask thingy is always open, i may ramble alot if i get passionate enough though so be warned! hehe

ok goodbye ill edit or change this whenever idk

Edit Entry 1 - 11th Moon, 2023

for context, keita/raze (he/him) is my irl partner. he's been a simp for alucard (castlevania) longer than i've begun simping for strahd. i only discovered this years into the relationship when we watched castlevania (where i expected to be a bigger simp for castlevania), and instead HE made high pitch simping noises as alucard appeared on the screen and i was like -sus eyes- wait a GOSH DARN MINUTE-. also, keita has a thing for necks. i shrugged it off when he first told me, but years later i started simping for strahd and now i look back at that moment like 'hm. odd.-'. anyways, i mostly started dating him because he sounds like a kermit the frog southern guy who goes 'howdy howdy' and he says 'i should be golden' unironically and i think thats pretty funny

i tag stuff as #making a keita tag so when keita presses this he can see all the stuff that he likes so that i can organize stuff and incase he ever decides to poke around my blog and use this tag search within my blog

Edit Entry 2 and 3 - 12th Moon, 2023

syrips OC/PC list (loosely alphabetical)

Other People's Adored OC/PC list (loosely alphabetical)

Edit Entry 4 - 7th Moon, 2024

hi huge warning that im fucking WEIRD. like i know people may enjoy the idea of me for entertainment/indulgence purposes but please please. if you ask/tell me to do something, i will 90%-chance take it seriously and respond bluntly/directly. please take my warnings seriously and please please interact with me responsibly!!

and i already know some would be like, 'oh syrips people always say that. they wanna act unique/special by calling themselves weird'. like. thats fair if people dont believe that but please dont be surprised when freakos start feeling more comfortable/vulnerable around you and you become shocked. like. stop trying to shame/blame freakos for what they've warned since the beginning. please, it's hurtful and disrespectful.

my asks are always open, be as blunt/direct as you want. most of my cws will be with "cw: " before it. let me know if you want me to cw tag something!

i use the #be cringe be free tag for weirdos/freakos/happy/indulgent stuff. this can include stuff that isnt 'cringe', and/or cringe we embrace. it's okay to be cringe. it's okay to say cringe culture is dead. it's okay to not see things as cringe. it's okay to embrace the cringe. it's okay to indulge, to be your favorite version of you. it's okay to indulge, even if it's unfamiliar/scary. i use the tag for moments of doing what makes you happy, regardless if youre unfamiliar with that indulgent feeling. be cringe be free!!

[lunarwarden]

Modern/Heartsteel Thresh and Diana HC

Where did this absurd/strange ship manifest?

Well, I was talking with a friend who felt there wasn’t entirely anyone they could ship Yone with, and I voiced the same about Diana, though pointed out that Thresh would be cute to pair with Yone due to their spirit blossom skins. “Let’s just ship Diana and Yone then!” Was said not too long after that we also threw Thresh into the mix… Needless to say, it originated in the Spirit Blossom universe, but I’ve adapted both Thresh and Diana to Heartsteel and High Noon.

Goodness, I’m so nervous to post this but fuck it. If anyone wants to bitch at me, you can kiss my ass X’D

Heartsteel Thresh Headcanons

Erlok is an ASMR RP/commentary channel that started a few years ago and quickly gained traction thanks to his voice. His channel name is The Warden where he refers to himself as Thresh and tends to refer to his viewers when not doing his roleplay content as “My Precious Souls”.

The content that Erlok puts out has gained him the nickname of “Master” among his fans as his asmr roleplays tend to veer about yanderes. His content tends to be on the darker side, but despite this, he has countless fans flocking to him.

Erlok came up with the name of Thresh in a DND session he was a part of, he’s since sadly stopped hosting that campaign, but it did give him the idea of “what if I brought my ability to roleplay others into a video setting?” an idea that has entrapped many in his content.

Totally has a Patreon where he does NSFW ASMR content that he makes a killing from.

OLD MAN SQUINTS Literally cannot read for shit without his glasses, and even then, he hasn’t updated his prescription in like 5 years? So, it’s gotten worse, and he still squints when he’s trying to read even with his eyeglasses on.

Erlok is a relatively slender man, and maybe has some muscle, but if he does it's lean muscle and doesn’t show too much aside from some minor definition. And even then, he tends to hide his figure behind turtlenecks and coats.

Totally has an abnormally long tongue and at the very least sharp canines (Though sharp teeth be looking spicy). He’s made quite a few past partners choke by shoving his tongue down their throat, apparently not something most people like.

Erlok was born and raised in Germany, he grew up not knowing English but taught himself it when he found there was a larger DND community of people who spoke English. He then further refined his English and his accent so that he could make an ASMR channel and not worry about being not understandable. He’s not ashamed of his accent or anything, just knows he can reach a broad audience with English.

Has a more ‘refined’ or ‘sophisticated’ style. Tends to wear turtlenecks, dress pants, button-ups, and the works.

Also, can see him wearing black eyeliners, maybe lipstick if he’s feeling fancy, but primarily black eyeliner and some concealer to hide the nasty ass bags he has under his eyes. Man, fr be looking like The Walking Dead without it.

Closeted Jew, no one can tell me otherwise haha. (Obviously, this means while he might practice things in the comfort of his home, he doesn’t actively wear his kippa or follow traditions of wearing his Tefillin out and about on days that require it)

Heartsteel Diana Headcanons

Diana is a relatively new Vtuber who has quickly gained fame. Her content tends to be a bit all over the place, but she does focus more on singing and horror games. Her fans seem to enjoy her reactions to the jump scares and scary content.

Her channel name is The Lunar Goddess, though her fans tend to call her “Moon Mom” while she refers to her fans as “Moonbeams”. None of her fans know what she looks like or her real name, and she plans to keep it that way for a bit longer as she doesn’t want to disappoint people with her appearance.

Other content that Diana does is skits, first-person shooters, and relaxing streams where she just hangs out with her chat. Her content is relatively pg-13 but there are times when her foul mouth does get it marked a higher rating.

Diana lives with her sister, Leona, and her sister’s boyfriend, Pantheon. Leona tends to make appearances in her streams as a mod who watches the chat and can sometimes be heard reading the chat out to Diana when she’s really focused on her game. This has gained Leona the nickname “Auntie Sun”.

Was born with naturally white hair, it confused doctors because it at first started as a streak through her sable hair as a kid, but over the course of a few years, her entire head was turned white. At first, doctors thought it was Poliosis, but now they just don’t know what caused her hair to go white.

Diana was born and raised in a very conservative Jewish household in Israel. She’s still Jewish, but not as religious as her mother and father are. She partakes in some of the traditions with Leona, but even then, sometimes misses out on some.

English is a language that came relatively easily to Diana, she also knows Yiddish as it was spoken by her great-grandmother (Even if most other Israelis consider it a dirty gutter language) Her accent isn’t horribly thick, but it is noticeable and the first thing she’s often asked by new viewers is “where do you come from?”

Diana tends to wear either jeans or long skirts that cover the knees, same for dresses, but for tops, she’s fine with showing a bit of stomach and has no qualms about wearing tank tops.

Diana doesn’t wear too much makeup, especially since she works behind a screen away from the view of others. On the days that she does go out, a light lipstick with some mascara and blush works fine for her.

[somethingwittyandweird]

Dawn of a New Year- 2023

Another passed dateline, another revolution, and other witty holiday-appropriate aphorisms here. Like a bolt from the blue, it’s time for my own year in review.

What’s there to say about the year behind me? Not much that makes it unique, but not every year needs to have some flagship moment to define it. It was enough to just be another length of time where mostly less than major stuff happened. I guess I get that impression because my situation in life is pretty much the same as it was this time last year, and it doesn’t show any signs of changing any time soon.

Like I mused on last year, it’s nice to have a place that feels comfortable, that works and provides well while being basically secure enough to stay in indefinitely. At the same time, it leaves me with the sense that ‘indefinitely’ can’t mean forever. There are other things I feel I have to move on to from here. It would be *very* nice if I knew when to move on, or even what those things I have to move on to are in a little more concrete detail. I feel it’s almost a risk of getting stuck in this security and not taking the steps to step forward, waiting for the right moment without realizing that it won’t get any easier until I start moving. All I can say is, the answer wasn’t this year. We’ll see what light that 2023 will be able to shed.

All that vague nonspecific concerns for the future aside, this was a good year. I spent a lot of time with the friends in my life who are so dear to me, in all their various arrangements. Spending time visiting in person friends, on call hanging or playing games with friends who are more distant. I’ve been part of the longest and most fantasy-epic-feeling DnD campaign I think I’ve ever been in. I’m even on other peoples’ streams sometimes, and some very cool streams at that. (Guess this is the part where I plug that, so, uh, here.) And my friends brought me on board for my latest fandom enjoyment by inviting me to our Owl House group watch.

I played some good games this year. I experienced the choice collection of Shimomura tunes in KH Melody of Memory, got to copilot a friend through my incredibly beloved Outer Wilds and its DLC, and partnered up for the incredibly how-has-this-not-been-thought of experience of TWEWY online co-op via Parsec. (I also checked out its sequel, which definitely lived up.) I took another friend through Return of the Obra Dinn’s deductive mystery after being wowed by it myself. Midway through the year, I found myself very charmed by Ikenfell, a game that does a *lot* of things right- I’d say it’s my recommendation of the year. Then to round out the last months I ended up *really* sucked into Splatoon 3 (at this point I’ve seen so many salmon, but I never get tired of it). And, wouldn’t you know it, I also had the chance to do the special run event with another beloved friend.

So I guess that’s the theme of this year, if I really had to put something down. I got to share so many things, so many conversations, so many experiences, with so many people. I know that people being in my life can change with very short notice (and this year bears witness, I saw multiple friend groups and communities undergo some painful restructuring before my eyes), so I don’t ever want to take their presence for granted. If you��re reading this, you the mutual reading this, know that I cherish you, you are dear to me, you are crucial to my online world being as enjoyable as it is, and I hope with all my heart for you that this new year has everything that you’re hoping to see in it.

To whatever the next year brings, I hope we all come out better for it. Ultimately, to be a little better and a little more improved each day is the best outcome I can wish for myself and the people I care about.

Happy New Year.

[critroleaintcrit]

Oh man, I am so afraid to voice criticism on CR. But pretending like it’s just a stream of some friends who play dnd and everything they do can not be criticized because they once were small creators is not the way.

I feel like it should be criticized that they partnered with a multi-national and rich ass corporation like Amazon.

To be honest?

I’d even were happier if we would just get one really good season without their involvement than two and live with the thought that CR supports a company that doesn’t pay it’s workers fairly.

I know your original post was about character arcs. And to some degree the players and Matt have autonomy over that. But I feel like there are some patterns. For example: in both campaigns the queer coded guys die without an apparent chance of resurrection (Vax and Molly). Liams whole thing has hints of queer baiting to it. Out of character talking about Caleb finding Essek attractive, the Blumentrio and their past but then suddenly deciding that Caleb is in love with Jester. At least we got some representation from Ashley and Marisha.

At last I just want to say that I really enjoy CR. But the toxic way (imo) criticism is handled in the community makes it sometimes exhausting to talk to fellow fans of the show.

.

(My ask box is open and anonymous is on so you can send in your thoughts and criticisms about the show without getting any backlash for expressing an opinion.)

[dndaddyissues]

hi im kind of seeing a guy who DMs (hopefully he does not have a tumblr lol) and i’ve never played but it sounds very interesting and i’ve been trying to learn more about it and i think it would be really fun to sit in on one of his sessions with his friends but i have no idea if that would be weird to suggest? I don’t really know anything about dnd etiquette, so would it be weird or intrusive? any other advice is welcome too!! :-)

not weird or intrusive at all! you should definitely ask — he will then likely ask his players to gauge their comfort level! i will say, it’s definitely not a personal thing if they say no, some tables prefer to keep things private. if he’s a forever DM, you could even offer to DM a one-shot (or even a campaign 👀) just for him, or for him and some of your friends 😉 i’m sure he’d appreciate that. if he and his players are cool with you sitting in, and the vibes are good, you could ask to drop in as a guest star for a one-off session to get your feet wet as a D&D player.

some table etiquette to keep in mind: try to pay attention to what’s happening; you’re basically spectating as an audience member. but, it’s also a home game! so unless your DM and his players are actors / used to performing / podcasting / streaming, they probably won’t be playing with an audience in mind. to that extent, there will probably be stretches of game time that are fun for them to play through (like shopping, planning, exploring etc) but not very interesting for you to watch. to that extent, ask the table and the guy you’re seeing how they’d feel about you checking your phone, or if that would be distracting to them.

if you’re kinda serious about learning from this experience, you could bring a journal and write some notes about the campaign / questions about mechanics etc. generally speaking, just try to stay quiet and not be disruptive with what you’re doing (whether that’s journaling, going on your phone, doing some work, etc). it all depends on the table though, the players could be super friendly and wanting to include you / explain things to you. or they could just want to play their game and are fine with you spectating.

i’m offering this advice from the perspective of a GM who has had one of their players’ partners drop in multiple times to an ongoing campaign as a spectator (before the pandemic). this partner was very disruptive and distracted — she would just do work on her laptop, which was fine, but then she’d constantly exclaim out loud about her work, interrupting what we were doing, and she’d try to talk to her partner (my player) while we were in the middle of stuff. she wasn’t there to watch us, she was there because she was waiting for her partner to finish their D&D session and didn’t want to go to a coffee shop or whatever. me and the other players got sick of it after a while and we asked the player in question not to bring their girlfriend anymore. no problems followed after that.

i’ve also had a great experience with someone dropping into a session to watch. this person was a roommate of me and my partner (also a player in my campaign). they were watching with the express purpose of learning more about D&D and potentially joining the campaign later (everyone at the table knew and was OK with this). they paid attention during the whole 4-5 hour session, laughed along at our jokes, reacted as an audience member, and at the end was very excited about what was happening. they ended up joining our campaign as a sixth player.

this is all to say, go ahead and ask him! yay!!

[reversemoon255]

(This is the final of a three-part series chronicling the development and ideas behind “Dungeons ‘n’ Dragonites,” a Pokémon DnD campaign. This last entry will be about the final string of encounters, some of the later ideas for story elements, and a deep dive into the overarching themes of the campaign’s Starters. Speaking of, the fantastic art of them, along with many of the other original Pokémon seen here, was done by @extyrannomon on Twitter, and I highly suggest you check them out.)

Dungeons ‘n’ Dragonites - Phase 3: Fauxchemine

Like the Queen Durant, the Steelix/Glacix fight would have been a transitory battle between phases of the campaign, taking place right before the Starters were about to evolve for the final time. Glacix was an idea I came up with early in development. As Rock, Steel, and Ice have a relationship throughout Pokémon, having Onix evolve into a specially tanky Ice-Type rather than the physically tanky Steelix made sense. This was also a design I put a lot of work into the actual proportions, like stretching its face vertically as Onix is circular, and Steelix is horizontally stretched. Also, as Steelix has two long spikes on every other segment, Glacix has four smaller spikes in the same pattern.

Glacix was also the first of the four penultimate boss encounters before the close of the campaign, each representing one of the four sacred beasts of Chinese mythology. I thought it would be a pattern that players could recognize and possibly plan ahead for. Glacix was always planned as the Phase 2-to-3 transitory boss, but I actually had roughly prototyped the other three before I realized Glacix fit into role of the Azure Dragon (which I was missing).

The second of the bosses, representing both the Black Tortoise and Rare Variants, was a Dire Torterra. The idea was this Torterra was symbiotic, housing a Sudowoodo instead of a tree, and hiding its identity was a shiny Altaria capable of Mega Evolving thanks to the Key Stone that had replaced one of Torterra’s stone spikes. This was a rough concept, and I’m sure it would have changed drastically by the time the players would actually encounter it.

Third, representing both the White Tiger and Ultra Beasts, was Shora (from Shodo and Tora, the Japanese words for calligraphy and tiger). A pure white tiger that paints floating, metal stripes above its body with its brush-like tail. This was an idea I was very happy with, though I lacked the artistic abilities to render it effectively. If I remember correctly, the markings above its shoulder were based on the Kanji for Tiger. I also hadn’t settled on an ability for it, which was key for depicting Ultra Beasts in this campaign.

And the last of the penultimate bosses was Phanic, being a second Ultra Beast and representing the Vermilion Phoenix. Sadly, I had little planned for this guy apart from some concept designs, like the rest of them. I was working on these as the campaign was starting, and didn’t pursue finishing them after its premature conclusion.

Phanic (from Phoenix and Panic) is actually an Ostrich. If you picture a phoenix, you typically imagine great plumes of feathers around the head, wings, and tail, which are all things Ostriches specifically lack, and I wanted to subvert that typical depiction. I liked the idea that when it was startled, it would scatter its feathers resulting in an exclamation point forming using the spot on its face. It was supposed to seem unassuming compared to the many larger and more imposing bosses, though just as dangerous. Also, it was Electric-Type because it is frequently “shocked” *Ba-dum-tish.*

=====

Let’s talk about our players. One of the backstory elements our Grass Trainer, Ethan, had was that his parents’ restaurant was struck by lightning and destroyed some time before he went to school, and saw a Pokémon at that time. This left him with a fear of lightning (ironically picking an Electric-Type Starter). With this knowledge, and as I was using Ultra Beasts, I altered his backstory slightly so that it was caused by a Xurkitree, and would eventually encounter one during the campaign with his victory over it (probably with a lot of Wisdom Saves) curing his phobia.

Johnny, our Fire Trainer, had a goal of becoming an entertainer, but was vague about what kind. I had an idea for a “Streamer” Trainer Class he could run into. Someone who uses their Rotom Phone to live stream battles and get reactions and advice from their chat. (Let’s face it, if Pokémon were real, this would totally be a thing.) There was also DJ Tomomitsu, who runs Stelopy City’s Trainer Radio, and was a Gym Leader. The idea was to present a bunch of different Pokémon-based entertainment ideas and professions and have him decide which ideas he liked and wanted to pursue.

While our other players were aiming for careers, Orion, our Water Trainer, was more interested in exploring his relationship with his family. His father in particular; both he and his wife being high-ranking executives for Silph Co., and raising their children to also be successful. However, Orion had always wanted to be a Trainer, and it was his parents that prevented him from adventuring. I had it that his father was so against the idea was because he, too, was a Trainer in his youth. But not a successful one, failing many more times than he succeeded, and didn’t want his son to suffer the same disappointments as he did. His partner was Rhyperior, btw.

Lastly was our Fairy Trainer, Arthur. He wanted to be a Gym Leader, and cited specific interest in the Galar League. He also mentioned in his back story that his father was belligerent and against the idea. While the Leaders of the Galar League are entertainers by profession, if you look at the list of Gym Leaders and Kahunas in US equivalent regions, almost all of them have a profession and run Gyms on the side:

(Restaurant Owner, Museum Curator, Artist, Model, Business Tycoon, Pilot, Actor, Teacher, Rock Star, Mayor, Shop Owner, Police Officer; 12/15)

It felt like a hobby, rather than a career, and I ran with this idea as it seemed like Arthur and his obsession with the Galar League hadn’t noticed this fact (nor had his player), but his father had and was pushing him into a sports-based career (one that is usually lucrative and has off-seasons) so he could have a well-paying job and time on the side for his interests, similar to Orion’s father.

Though, no DM can control their players, and even by the end of our fist session I could tell I would have to change some things. It’s just good to have some idea of where to lead everyone, and adjust as you go.

=====

There’s one more Pokémon I want to talk about before we get to the Starters.

This is Necrotiti (Combining Necro with the Egyptian God Nefertiti), an evolution of Cofagrigus, evolving if it’s holding an item called the “Ceremonial Jar” (literally a jar filled with Yamask’s human intestines). It was meant to evolve from the Yamask they could catch during their museum field trip. The reason it exists is... silly. It’s another instances where I wanted to surprise my players, and giving the “Gardevoir Treatment” to what I consider the creepiest Pokémon was funny (which I feel is a reason I cite a lot). And I was really happy with this design, which is why it got commissioned.

A lot of the original ideas I had for this campaign were meant to either surprise or creep out my players. Everyone I was playing with knew Pokémon very well, so I had this fear that if I presented them with a standard adventure they would either become bored or be able to easily predict where things were going. Having a Pokémon adventure within a single city, having it be more a mystery than a collect-a-thon, and using new Pokémon were all ways I came up with to keep interest high and have them guessing as to what would happen next.

Back to Necrotiti, despite having a sarcophagus Pokémon, we didn’t get a mummy. I wanted to make the body effeminate without being overly so, which is why her body is very geometrical in specific areas. For the mask, I went with a typical Egyptian Nubian motif mixed with some of the overall design elements and basic lines from Yamask, and the colors and patterns from Cofagrigus. But despite how much I like it, I don’t know if I would have used it. It didn’t match the Mutant Evolution concept, with its only similarity being that it’s a rare occurrence.

Onto the Starters: Epipesis has evolved into Drachenura (from Dragon, Lichen, and Meganeura). Grass Starters are typically based on extinct animals, and Flymph’s line is based on a Meganeura (an ancient species of giant dragonfly). Apart from some bulking out and additional colors, the lichen sacks in its tail are now yellow, as the plant matter has evolved with it. It supplies it with so much energy that it has to constantly move while the sun’s up to burn it off. Its tail tip is also based on the X-15, the fastest aircraft to date, as it was designed to be the fastest Grass-Type.

Steared has evolved into Auradiat (from Aura, Auroch, and Radiate). Now a Fire/Ice-Type, it’s based on an extinct species of cattle found around the time of the Ice Age. Its ability to absorb energy with its horns has become so powerful that they have frozen over. When I was originally designing it, I was actually trying to base it on the phrase “Irish Bull” (meaning a paradoxical statement), but as I kept working on it, it became more and more Minotaur-like, so I kept the Fire/Ice-Typing and dropped the more abstract elements. As I did, I actually made it more bull and less Minotaur since all Fire Starters are bipedal, and I wanted to try and avoid that.

Knaval has evolved into Chivalazuli (from Chivalier, the French word for knight, and Lapis Lazuli). This was probably my favorite example of features naturally changing as it evolves, with the antenna growing longer and the shield and lance growing harder (going from carapace, to stone, to crystal). Some of the things you might not have noticed at first glace were his forelegs becoming sub-arms on his chest, him gaining the lobster nose and it becoming a face guard, and how his eyes recess into his head. Also, almost every Starter is symmetrical (apart from patterns), with the only exception being Torterra, so I designed it to be asymmetrical throughout.

And Uteteo has evolved into Makutah (from the Aztec naming scheme used for their Gods of wealth and abundance and Utahraptor). He’s Fairy/Flying, with the gold adornments that first appeared on Uteteo now on his head and arms, giving him a more bird-like appearance. The idea was to have him naturally evolve from a Dinosaur into a bird, with the leg bands making them look more like talons, and the face mask giving him a beak. Also, he starts out with the singular sickle toe raptors are known for, and gets a new one every evolution, ending with a full set.

The thing that sets these Starters apart from ones you’d find in the games is that these are designed to be a team. As such, there are a few themes they all share to help reinforce that. (This ignores Utaw, but) All the Starters, throughout their evolutions, have a distinct yellow detail on their heads (eyes, nose ring, and antenna). Furthermore, once they reach their final stages, they share colors between them, with Drachenura having red on its extremities, Auradiat having blue neck fur, and Chivalazuli having flecks of green in its gemstone. And on top of that, they also all have two overarching themes. First is they all represent different time periods, with Drachenura being pre-humans (Precambrian), Auradiat being prehistoric humans (Ice Age), and Chivalazuli being more modern (Medieval Period). Secondly they all represent DnD, with a Dragon(fly), Auradiat filling the role of a minotaur and its connection to a labyrinth/dungeon, and the adventurous knight who traverses them.

There’s also reasoning behind their types, as all three’s secondary Types are also strong against their usual counterpart (Grass and Electric are both strong against Water, Fire and Ice against Grass, and Water and Rock against Fire). Furthermore, Electric, Ice, and Rock are all strong against Flying, which is the reason behind Makutah’s Type (a joke against the player who joined late).

Makutah does fit into these themes, but more loosely as it was created later. Utaw and Uteteo lack the yellow facial details (though they do have yellow eyes), only really achieving this during their final evolution. He also doesn’t share any colors, as Fairy is outside the usual threesome. It does somewhat fit into the themes of the others, but not as cleanly. Utaw, being a Dinosaur, is still pre-humans, but closer to them than Flymph is, and having Aztec themes puts him past Medieval and closer to the Renaissance in terms of human history, but is very close compared to the other time gaps. Also, the gold was partly to fit him into the DnD theme, representing treasure.

=====

One of the first things the players were told at the beginning of the campaign, and was reinforced throughout, was that Pokémon from outside the Wellou Region were mysteriously popping up all over the place, with the Ultra Beasts being the most extreme example. As to the cause, there were a number of red herrings. Silph Co. employees could occasionally be seen in areas where UBs were with strange equipment, Tomomitsu could occasionally be found before something would show up, and there were a few other strange characters like the Regional Champion or Silph Co.’s president. The only definite thing they would know was that there was a strange, creepy, grey Charizard that would occasionally appear when they took something down.

However, it would eventually be revealed that the above were only trying to understand what was going on, and prevent the appearances of such dangerous Pokémon, like our heroes. And as a massive Ultra Wormhole appears above the city, they come face-to-face with the true mastermind. Not an evil team, or a lone conqueror. Merely a single, twisted Pokémon. And our heroes have interfered with its fun long enough.

“You stare up at the now familiar form of the grey Charizard, which stares back with unblinking, dead eyes... Its mouth stretches wide, wide enough to swallow you whole, and a hand appears. And another. And another. Four skeletal hands pry its maw open from the inside, stretching it until its skin falls down to settle on its hips. What looks down on you now, with a single, glowing eye, is a monstrous form made of bone and rotting flesh. And witnessing the four of you before it, it lets out a high-pitched, chilling laugh...

“‘Fofofofofo...’“

Fauxchemine. A sadistic Ultra Beast capable of warping time and space to its will. All the disturbances throughout the town, all the strange creatures that have appeared, all the monsters sent to terrorize our heroes; all the result of its twisted sense of fun, and the consequences of getting in the way of it.

So there’s a running joke among my friends that we all “hate” Charizard. Not actually, but it’s always pushed in marketing with new forms and such, even though its popularity has been dropping steadily over the years. As such, I thought it would be somewhat cathartic to have the big bad they have to beat up at the end be related to Charizard. ‘Chemine’s skeletal nature comes from trying to cinematicly picture the encounter in my mind, with the eerie image of the mouth stretching open from the dialogue earlier. With bone white and rotten greens, the skin wasn’t meant to reflect Charizard as a shiny, but rather with all its color drained from it, as it’s more a puppeted skin than an actual part of the Pokémon. And as many Pokémon draw inspiration from Kaiju, ‘Chemine does, too, specifically calling back to an Ultra-Kaiju named Greeza with space warping abilities.

It’s Steel/Dragon with Thick Fat. When planning encounters, especially this late into the game, Auradiat made things tough since its offensive Typing is insane, and that combination made it resistant to all of the Starter Types except Fairy. This was supposed to be the toughest fight in the campaign, so I wanted to build a Pokémon that would be difficult to deal damage to. A swift Pokémon able to warp around the field, summoning Ultra Beasts or other versions of Charizard as adds or for specific attacks, I wanted this to be memorably difficult.

Oh, and the name? It’s meant to rhythmically sound like “Pokémon,” with the ‘faux’ symbolizing its disguise, and the ‘mine’ representing its personality. Everything in this world is its to play with.

But that giant Ultra Wormhole wasn’t just for show. Part-way through Phase 2 our players were sucked through a Wormhole themselves, both they and Fauxchemine bearing witness to a titanic creature as they did, and upon its defeat, it is let loose upon the city:

Standing over 100ft tall is Wreknarogg (from wreck, to destroy, Níðhöggr, a massive world-ending creature from Norse mythology, and Ragnarok, the end of the world). A massive symbiotic group of four Pokémon from a dead world, the whale-squid Bayleige, the parasitic Serrasite, and the barnacle Rhizocano. This was actually the first symbiotic Pokémon I designed, and its creation sparked the others like Shiinotic and Torterra so this wouldn’t be the first time our players encountered one.

Whales are the largest creatures on Earth, so using one as the base for a kaiju-sized Pokémon fit. It also helped that the prototype designs for the Cloverfield monster were based on a whale, so I had something to go on. Secondly, I really like a lot of the eldritch design philosophy, and a lot of those are based on sea creatures, which is where the combined squid elements came from. Also, when I was prototyping the design and trying to make it creepier, a friend suggested having a parasite coming out of its blowhole, which is what sparked the creation of Serrasite and Rhizocano (as whale’s are known to have such parasites in real life).

This was a design very inspired by the world it was supposed to inhabit. Coming from a desert world where they are the only living things remaining, they symbiotically support each other to stave off their own inevitable death, with Bayleige able to create rain with its ability and Rhizocano able to make artificial sunlight to feed Serrasite. Serrasite then gives energy to Bayleige to allow it to keep moving, and Rhizocano takes energy from Bayleige. It’s an incomplete system where energy is slowly lost over time.

Stage 2 of the final boss wasn’t supposed to be as intense as the last one. A gimmick for this fight was, at the start of every round, I was going to roll a D100, and an event would happen. They would be things like their friends showing up with healing items, trainers they knew joining the battle, wild Pokémon they’d befriended getting in pot shots, etc. It was meant to be a fun, celebratory, “you’re at the end of the campaign” fight rather than an intense one off the back of another. I was even considering having everyone use their full parties.

But after it’s defeated, a thick, dark haze enshrouds everyone. With their allies gone, and left with just their Starters, our players are alone in a dark void. I did say there were four Pokémon earlier...

And the final encounter is Wreknarogg (Core). The Pokémon who brought the three titans together, and controls them while siphoning off some of their energy to survive. Similar to Phanic, this was another unassuming Pokémon. Designed to resemble a virus while calling back to aspects from mythical Pokémon like Jirachi or Manaphy. I understand it might not feel as climactic as there wasn’t any set-up compared to ‘Chemine, who was shown throughout, or the previous Wreknarogg, who was foreshadowed, but I wanted a 3-stage boss fight, and this felt like a good way of concluding it.

While stage 1 was supposed to be difficult, and stage 2 was meant to be fun and call back to the long journey, stage 3 was an un-losable, cinematic fight with a somewhat somber tone to it. It was the final fight, the end of it all, and there’s a certain level of sadness that comes with that in accordance with the jubilation of completion. It was also meant to see how much everyone had grown; how would they handle this encounter? Fight it? Catch it? Persuade it? Maybe I haven’t listened to enough DnD finalés, but in how many can you beat the final boss by being nice to it and calming it down?

=====

And that’s the end. There would be some sort of epilogue, picking up with our characters some months or years later, but that’s not something I could write without witnessing the actions of the players. I was debating having everything that came from an Ultra Wormhole be sucked back in after Fauxchemine’s defeat, including the Starters (pull a Digimon Tamers), but as Wreknarogg came from a dead world I thought that a little cruel.

And to end things how I usually do; Overall, despite not getting off the ground, I was very happy with this project. I’m the type to pick up and drop projects frequently, and the fact that I stuck with and continued to work on it for months was something I was really proud of. It was also a great learning experience on many levels. And who knows; maybe I might do something like this again in the future...?

[raptorix]

Shipping thoughts

Just writing things out, trying to get them out of my head.

SPOILERS FOR CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 2 FINALE

Okay I may not have finished the last 3 hours of the stream yet, but I dug around in the tags enough to get the best of the spoilers to figure out what was left.

Shipping-wise: I'm elated. Everyone interested got to be with their partners!

I am fully comfortable and happy with where ships stand at the end of 141, too. I wasn't expecting any 'mARRIED WITH CHILDREN' epilogues, because the Mighty Nein haven't known each other as long as Vox Machina did by the end. Timeline-wise, their adventures as the Mighty Nein on the stream took just under a year. And most of the relationships crystalized in the last couple months of their adventures, at most.

Vox Machina had about least a solid year's worth of adventures prior to the stream in the 'home game' days. And then after 2/3s of the campaign passing, they had a year break to spend on relationships for those involved.

But you know what this means? Room for further development in One-shots! Vox Machina got 'Search for Grog' which needed to be furthered in 'Search for Bob', which at the very end gave us the De Rolo Destination Wedding that capped off the Vox Machina adventures.

Who knows what the Mighty Nein get? I predict we'll get an Uk'otoa One-Shot, especially if Fjord wants to finally not have to watch his back for his former patron's forces coming to punish him every time he sets sail. And who knows what we'll get from there?

And also, the wonderful thing about fandom? Transformative fiction.

Have fun daydreaming about fictional people doing things that may or may not possibly happen in the empty spaces between scenes or after the show.

Like here, might as well play in the space right now:

Fjorester kids: I imagine 3, and because of of how DnD lineages work, we can get a weird combo of results. What if they have a green tiefling, a blue/grey half-orc, and possibly a water genasi kid? (That Genasi lineage skips generations!)

Or maybe not? What if Fjord visits Port Demali, where he grew up, and finds some closure with his crappy childhood by getting the caretaker of the orphanage replaced, and possibly fostering the current teenagers at the orphanage as crew for the Nein Heroez? Being a proper father figure like Vandren was, but being a better father too.

What if BeauYasha and Shadowgast pairs had kids later, too? How? With Magic, that's how! Caleb is a Transmutation Wizard, he probably has some solutions.

Beau and Yasha babysitting Enfeebled Molly-King kinda made me think that they'd make pretty good parents. I don't think Beau can get away with absconding with her baby brother to raise him better. They'd make awesome Lesbian Mothers on their own.

Essek is gonna have to deal with outliving his partner, Caleb. But what if years down the line, Caleb convinces Essek that a living legacy might ease the hurt of out-living a human partner? Have a little half-elf kid? Get to surround himself with generations of family by the time he himself gets elderly sounds nice.

This was the stuff I spent today daydreaming about, lol. Had to write these down or else I'd fixate on these ideas all weekend. :P

Edit: Oh hey! I almost forgot about Kingsley! Everything is shiny and new, and I fully expect he's going to learn about fucking soon. If one of the first places he goes is waiting for Captain Fjord on the Nein Heroez, he's going to be getting to know the crew. I have a feeling he will home in on Marius as his first fuckbuddy. IDK what the rest of the crew is like, but I imagine he'll try and sleep with everyone (even make a pass at Orly, but get declined.)

When Fjord and Jester get back, I imagine one them would encounter Kingsley hiding away in his little fuck bunk on a fuck break, probably with Marius. Marius will obviously get all the blame, and Jester will probably gossip with Kingsley while Fjord would caution him to tone things down to hopefully avoid future conflicts. (HE'S BEEN THERE.)

[seawolvesanddragons]

Merlin Short - The Youtuber AU

Alright, to start with, Gwaine [Username: AngrIrishman] mostly does prank videos; his is primarily a comedy channel. It starts off as in the moment pranks (probably while he is uni). As he gains more followers and grows more confident he starts doing a few sketches, usually the same characters in different scenarios (the series “drunk Irishman confused by British things is the number one favourite.) After a semester or two he drops out of uni, deciding it isn’t for him and he was only following family pressure, and he wants to do follow this youtube idea. He mostly pranks friends and family, all harmless stuff. After he meets Merlin he does a good deal of his pranks on him, but Elyan and Percival show up the mst as his victims (or partners in crime) since he’s lived with them both. He’s always willing to help out his friends with their videos, and often appears in Percival’s gaming competitions. Occasionally, for when Gwaine wants to address something serious or do a straight video of something bothering him, he has a series of “what’s aleing me today” where he talks about the serious stuff under the guise of drinking. His is one of the bigger youtube stars and his fame only skyrockets after he meets the others.  Percival [AllTankedUp] started in youtube as just responding to some of the more ridiculous challenges (planking, cinnamon challenge, parkour, etc) but ended up accidentally setting a ton of records. He started getting a lot of followers suggesting more challenges for him to do. After a year or two he began  

uploading video game run throughs after he purchased a video game and streamed playing it, not expecting anything big to come of it. The first video ending up trending for a few hours and requests came pouring in. However his biggest project, and the one he is most proud of and best known for, comes along in year three, after he met Elyan. They began recreating live action versions of video games, giant board games, etc. The internet fucking loses it over these videos. Most of them are endearingly low budget - the first is a live action super mario, where they had set up mushrooms and platforms in the park and a plushie princess peach is the prize. Elyan did MATH for this, guys.  Percival has to do exactly what Elyan tells him to do when Elyan holds the “controller” and vice versa. The video is ten minutes long and mostly consists of them falling over. Percy barely wins in the end, but he holds the plushie up all proud, looking adorable. By the next day they have over a hundred subscribers asking for more. Some of the live actions are HUGE events, brining in all of Percy’s friends and acquaintances and even family members but that’s usually only once a year. Typically, it’s no more than Percy, Elyan, and Gwaine or Leon or Merlin. Elyan helps out a lot with most of the recreations, but Percival came up with the idea and is the driving force behind it. He also has a side channel for workout videos after 2 1/2 years of requests, where he posts irregular updates. Elyan [Elyuminati] gets pulled into youtube by Gwen, and starts out as the occasional guest star in her vlogs, before submitting the odd vlog video himself, usually just him ranting about whatever in his life is annoying him at the time. It was meant to just be a way to let off steam, he didn’t expect anyone to watch them, but Elyan has a certain kind of odd charm and humor that attracts a humble but loyal following. During his gap year he travels around Europe and posts a lot of video diaries as a way of keeping in touch with Gwen, and it steadily improves over time. He starts doing “day in the life of” or “creepy ghost tour” or just sharing crazy stories about his travels. Elyan’s not a bad artist, so he’ll sometimes recreate brief sketches of the crazy stuff that happened to him while narrating what is going on. After his gap year (which almost turned into two) he returned to the UK and ended up rooming with Percy, who he knew from youtube, and started getting a degree in maths. His channel with Percy to do live action games took off, and he ended up being offered a job at a radio station after a year or so. The radio felt he had a personality that worked over radio just as well as camera. His radio show has a little bit of everything in it: acting as a voice of the millennial people, sharing whatever crazy thing happened to him that week, traveling and reviewing places and (his latest obsessions) weird news stories and conspiracies. (Leon and Gwaine could be blamed for the last one.) He doesn’t post as much except for the game videos or guest starring in others, since’s he’s busy with his radio show, but he will occasionally do a vlog session now and again, usually on his theories on conspiracies, game of thrones, and why the cosmos hates him enough to stick him with Gwaine. Leon [GiantRedGnomes], unlike Percy and Elyan, actually means to start a youtube channel. He starts off with gaming videos, including a dramatic series of the SIMS that everyone gets a little too invested in. However Leon is very conscious of the good that youtube can do, and so he also starts doing more educational style videos with fun animation. His main topics are history (but the fun kind, he focuses a lot on the weird parts of European history that no one ever talks about) space and alien life, etc. He also reviews a lot of popular tv shows and movies and shares his thoughts, opinions, and predictions for them as well as how the nerdier stuff checks out. Being the gentleman that he is, he typically tries to post both spoiler and non spoiler versions. He and Merlin start a Dnd series where they do short campaigns with different members of their friend group and other willing youtube stars. Lancelot [Lancephew], like Leon, does youtube “for the greater good.” He started youtube in high school as a project to bring “truly great people” into the spotlight by interviewing the people in his town about amazing things they had done in their lives, and he still tries to post videos like that whenever he can. Half of his videos are him taking news stories, politics, economic theories, etc and explaining it in layman’s terms for the average viewer. He shares his own opinions in the video as well. During college Lancelot started adding a musical element to his interview stories, writing his own songs to bring into the background. This branched out into him writing instrumental music, which he often shares on youtube and itunes. Lancelot is currently doing a YouTube Red project in aide of a charity that is about small town civilians having to deal with a zombie dystopia in a realistic manner - asking questions such as “do we still have to pay for data?” “Can someone take my braces off.”) Also, he’s dating Gwen and they do really cute “ask us questions” and dating game videos that the internet loves. There are also several videos of his dog doing crazy things he manages to catch on film. Gwen [GwenSmash] is mostly a youtube vlogger, and she shares a little bit of everything. Her day to day life, sped up streams of the cosplay outfits she makes the group, sims and gaming videos, ask/advice videos, review videos, and stories in a series called “Growing up Gwen” where she shares moments of her childhood/teenage years having to deal with being the only girl in a household of guys, such as buying a bra, trying to find a video game character that is a female without exposed breasts, etc. After she gets to know all the guys better, she will share moments of being one of the few girls among many guys, and has no shame in calling them out. Half of her twitter is photos of the guys holding up a sign saying “I said/made *insert sexist remark here*.” She doesn’t really try to limit herself to one brand and just does all kinds of videos. She and Morgana are often work together/guest star in each other’s videos as flatmates and best friends.   Morgana [ExplodingSparkles] got into youtube during college at Gwen’s encouragement. She liked to create her own music mashups and Gwen starting encouraging her to share them on youtube. Nowadays, she and Lance will team up occasionally to do music together, and she has written a few of her own songs, all released on youtube/itunes. A LOT of her video vlogs are feminist, LGBTQA, and wealth inequality rants, typically following her having to talk to Uther. She as a popular series called “Ask Morgana” where she answers questions her subscribers ask her. The beginning/middle of her channel (when it was getting big) has a lot of anger and rant videos about everything wrong with the world. Morgana eventually grew out of her angry stage, and began discussing the issues from a healthier pov, such as how you can be an ally, etc. She also started doing a lot more comedy sketches, all written and directed by herself. Some of them just have her in it as multiple people, others have her and Gwen or other guest stars. Some of them are just sketches about funny moments in her life, but most are original content, such as “Smart Shakespeare in Five Minutes” where she acts out a sketch of Shakespeare’s plays where everything goes very differently, usually based on one character making a smarter decision. Arthur [KingCamelot] started doing youtube in his final year of boarding school, and for the first year or so he and Morgana both tried to hide the fact that they were doing youtube from each other, until one day Morgana stumbled across his channel after it was recommended after one of Gwen’s videos. This was over summer break and the result was her barging in during one of his vlogs, and the entire (loud and hilarious) conversation was caught on film. Arthur later uploaded it to youtube, and neither will admit it is one of their favourite videos. Arthur kept it in a vlog style during uni, sharing his thoughts on current events, challenge videos, his favourite books and tv shows, his daily life and his struggle with uni/the business degree his father wanted him to get. He ended up switching to film editing sophomore year after Morgana, Leon and other youtuber friends supported his ideas. While it made things rockier with his father, Arthur was much happier. Videos became much more frequently after that, and Arthur began to guest star in his friends videos as well. Arthur became a big name on youtube almost instantly, largely because of his good lucks and his notoriety as the son of a famous parliament member, but remained a big name through his own merit. About midway through his time at uni Arthur began to post videos about insightful topics about things that suggested he was starting to see the world a bit differently. After he graduated about 4 years ago, it started to turn into full blown advocacy and outreach videos raising awareness for social change. Of course, Arthur didn’t get to that point by himself. Enter Merlin, stage right. Merlin [MerlinTrixx] started youtube HIS final year of public schooling, about two years after Arthur. He started with just short simple vlogs and magic tricks that even professional magicians couldn’t figure out. He followed Gwen and Morgana and saw Arthur a few times in their videos or recommended suggestions. After picking up on Arthur’s rather one sided view of how wealth and poverty work he called him out on it in a private message. Arthur did NOT take it well. There began a video war where both boys passive aggressively mentioned the other. Before it got to far, however, they accidentally ended up meeting at a youtube convention. (Arthur was there to speak on a panel, Merlin went to learn editing tips). The recognized each other and ended up talking for the remaining two days of the convention and became fast friends. Gwen, who had known Merlin through uni for about a year now, had had no idea that Arthur and Merlin had been complaining to her for the past few months about each other and was ready to knock sense into both of them when she found out. After becoming friends, Arthur and Merlin began showing up in each other’s videos more. Merlin, who hated his roommates, began hanging around more at Arthur and Leon’s flat (they went to a different uni in the same city, but had moved off campus) instead of Gwen’s as much. By the end of sophomore year, Merlin had gained a decent number of followers and his channel consisted of vlogs, his magic tricks, him and Arthur hanging out and being weird, and sharing his vast and unparalled knowledge of all things fantasy and nerdy. He, Leon and Gwen get into the longest discussions when they do reviews together. Merlin takes some time off of school, still unsure what he wants to do beside youtube, and moves in with Arthur to split the rent. The videos continue in earnest, and views/followers for both boys continue to grow as they feed off of one another, make more compilation videos, and add more content. After a couple of years, more than half their followers are wondering if they are more than just flatmates, but they are keeping quiet on the matter. The both still have their own channel, which they update frequently, but they also have a shared channel where they do reviews of shows they both like, ask/challenge requests, gaming videos, a few prank videos - they got into a prank way with Percy, Elyan and Gwaine once. Morgana and Gwen somehow won. They also do a deep discussion on Arthurian legend and other mythos, in comedic style. They are known as the “Avalon Nine” - a nickname given to them by the internet after they learned they all knew each other and they frequently appear in each others videos now that they all live in the same city. Morgana and Gwen had met in boarding school, and are currently living together after Morgana moved back after Uni until Lancelot finally asks Gwen to marry him, which Morgana suspects will happen soon. Gwen met Merlin at their uni, the same city that Arthur and Leon were going to uni in. Arthur already knew Gwen through Morgana and they had hung out fairly often, which only increased after they both befriended Merlin. Merlin and Gwen both met Lancelot separately at youtube conventions, and thought it hilarious the day they found out they both knew him. Lancelot moved to the city after graduating uni. Elyan met everyone through Gwen and Morgana met everyone through Gwen and Arthur. Gwaine met Merlin at a convention and later Merlin recognized him auditing his film class for “free editing tips/ideas.” They became fast friends and Gwaine spent a few nights in Merlin’s dorm when his water or heat wouldn’t work. He moves in with Elyan when he comes back from his gap years. Lancelot and Percival, who knew each other prior to the rest of the group, lived with each other for a while before the landlord sold the building. Lance moved to a single while Percival moved in with Elyan and Gwaine. There have been a series of “who knows you better” challanges and games throughout the group, including ones based off of dating games, best friend games, and family games. Merlin and Arthur have won them ALL. Even against Lancelot and Gwen that one time. Leon shared in one of his videos that Arthur and Merlin are also banned from teaming up in charades, pictonary and catch phrase in the gaming videos because they are undefeatable and possible psychic.  Bonus:  Mordred is obviously much younger than the others (just now starting Uni while the others are in their mid to late twenties). So he grew up watching a lot of their earlier stuff and he just idolizes them. He somehow managed to befriend them through social media/convenstions and is a bit surprised he is actually on first name basis with these amazing, talented (giant dorks). He appears in their videos sometimes but is hesitant  to upload anything on his own channel for a long time, since it is harder to get started on youtube now than it was for his older friends. After some encouragement he uploads a few, and the whole  group advertises him since they all kind of adore him, he’s like a little brother. Unlike the others though, Mordred doesn’t vlog or do video games or reviews or anything. Oh no. His videos are all freestyle rapping/spoken word poetry. About whatever catches his fancy. The weirdest thing is they’re GOOD. Its at such odds with his personality but it is what it is. Gwaine has started a betting pool on when Mordred reaches 1,000 subscribers.  Cenred is a little asshole who does mean/staged prank videos and blogs full of sexist and racist remarks on youtube. The group hates him, half of youtube boy cots him and he has had several scandals.  Elena is a youtube they all know and are friendly with, but because she lives in Scotland they aren’t as close. She does a lot of gaming videos, embarrassing stories from her life, and videos about her horse.  Morgause is a powerful admin/part owner of youtube and constantly makes decisions that hurt most independent and creative youtubers. At one point she tried to flag coming out videos or videos with content/opinions she didn’t agree with. She also pressures them to do advertising and tampers with the recommended and trending list. The group pushes back against these regulations, and it turns into an all out war, where Gwaine, Merlin and Arthur are all nearly banned from youtube before Morguase is fired. 

[envysea]

Future

In one week I will have graduated from University with a Bachelor’s in Wildlife Ecology and Management. The future weighs heavy upon my mind as I try to look forward. I’d like to utilize my degree but feel like I need to volunteer and build more work history. So in the meantime I have decided to stay in my hometown for a little while longer, build some equity and help my partner get a technical degree.

Another conclusion I have come to is that I desperately want to be a content creator. I’ve put off my creative efforts in lieu of school and because of subpar mental health. I’m frustrated with my current skill and capabilities in these things I do recreationally and I want to change that.

Below the break I’m gonna list my goals, and how exactly I want to achieve them.

Goals

Take Art Classes

Vend at Anime Banzai 2019

Write a DnD Campaign and Finish One of my Stories

Start a Podcast

Stream Actively on Twitch

Utilize my Degree

Anime Banzai I thought long and hard about applying for 2018 but decided it would be best to wait another year since I haven’t done much artwork for sometime now. I want to improve my anatomy and practice painting backgrounds in particular. I also want to offer more handicraft kind of things: mug cozies, jewelery And to work on providing more print size variety by getting things printed in smaller batches that aren’t so financially draining.

Art Classes Tentatively planning on visiting my Aunt this summer and doing something with her. My partner and I were also talking about taking a ceramic class. That would probably be this fall. I am also interested in taking a digital photography class and I’d love to take some traditional painting classes within the year too.

Writing I have a few stories/character I need to just push myself to write and edit later. My goal is in one year to have the first draft of a story totally done from start to end without getting hung up in editing. I also really want to try DMing so I need to make a few one shot campaigns and then work towards fleshing out the long campaign idea I have. I would like to have DMed at least one if not two one-shots.

Podcasting Depending on how DMing goes I’d like to edit that and post it as a podcast. The other podcast I would like to do would be specifically about snakes. My goal is to find someone willing to co-host and go through individual species and talk about them with me.

Streaming I want to set up a regular stream schedule to help build viewership and consistency. Right now I am trying to improve my Overwatch gameplay so that I’m fun and interesting to watch. Beyond that though I’d like to stream other things. I’d like to set aside a day for art streaming, and for playing other games besides Overwatch.

Post-Graduation I want to look for short fieldwork opportunities (1-2weeks) or other work in town to start padding my resume with. I also want to look more seriously into grad school.

[meanbossart]

ASK COMPILATION ABOUT THE WEIRD DROW

Replying to a couple of shorter questions! Sorry that I can't get to all of you lest this blog just turns into a stream of constant asks, but I read all of your messages and to be honest there are several that I'm saving to draw something for 😭 alas there are only so many hours in a day.

Thank you for all the support and interactivity as always!

He takes fairly good care of things he considers important or useful - otherwise he's pretty messy or at least indifferent to mess. Definitely a "leaves the wet towel on the bed" guy LOL

Okay so I was bad and not used to DnD mechanics or spells the first time I played the game, so I RARELY ever cast Speak With Animals and had very little sense of their personality during his campaign - BUT THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME WHEN I DID.

THERE WAS ONE TIME WHERE I REMEMBERED.

AND IT WAS PERFECT.

He adores and most of all respects this intense little guy with his whole heart.

[MORE UNDER THE CUT]

Serious answer: he respects wild animals far too much to try and make one into a pet.

Non-serious but still true answer: He would never do that and have to deal with Astarion's incessant Drizzt Do'urden joke comparisons for the rest of his existence. That's that man's personal hell.

He's fairly adaptable! But as far as dynamics go, he does lean bottom regardless of who he's with in bed, but this doesn't necessarily translate into always being on the receptive end of things.

If he were to be with a cisgender woman who doesn't wear a strap like its a second pair of briefs, he would be more than happy to be the pitcher the majority of the time. I think the only scenario where he would be dissatisfied is a restrictive one - he couldn't be with someone who doesn't want to enjoy his whole body in earnest, or who can't flip the roles every once in a while. Also, you have to be a little gross. He has probably caught Astarion off-guard with the things he did on a whim/suggested they do more than once. All in all, as long as whoever he's with is versatile and not a prude, they could probably make it work.

He killed Minthara in her lair and all he got was a bear out of it. Good thing killing her was it's own reward!

MAN... Could just be that his story is far too concrete in my brain already, but it's hard for me to see that working. They are both far too out of touch with their emotions and quiet in their demeanor for me to envision a durable romance sparking. Also, DU drow (who has no clue how old he is himself) thinks of Shadowheart as being far too young for him.

There is a mutual understanding between them that there is a barrier that neither of them is willing to let the other get past - and because that is something they both share, they won't, and they might never try. They work so well as friends because of their similarities, but in a relationship I think that would be to their detriment.

Also, I think silver-haired Shadowheart's wants and needs for her future far diverge from DU drow's chaotic lifestyle, ultimately It's probably best for them to make their own paths.

HAHAHAHA LISTEN.... YOU'RE TALKING AS IF THOSE TWO THINGS DON'T GO TOGETHER PERFECTLY WELL BUT IN MY MIND THEY ARE ONE AND THE SAME.

The thing about DU drow is that he might be a bottom, but he's a very... Uh, engaged bottom. He can be as dominant with a dick in his ass as he can be submissive depending on how it jives with his partner- and he's gonna spew some nonsense either way LOL

Either way... I feel ya brother 😔🍑

He did it himself during a dinner Gortash invited him to. At the table. With a meat knife. He was trying to prove a really stupid point/put Gortash off of him.

I have a script for this and I still need to draw it someday! 🤦‍♂️

He doesn't think anything of it now - it's so far in the past and DU drow obviously isn't the judgemental type when it comes to sordid individuals LOL

As a person, however, Astarion likely wasn't the kind of guy that he would have gotten along with, and vice-versa. Sounds to me like he was pretty poshy and did all his misdeeds under the table - DU drow wouldn't have strong feelings about it from an ethical standpoint, but he wouldn't respect it either. Also, DU drow's is practically anarchistic in his political views - soooooo not much room there to be in love with politicians. I'm sure pre-vampirism Astarion would have less than favorable opinions about him as well so the feeling would have been mutual LOL.

ABSOLUTELY NOT HE NEEDS BOTH EYES TO CUT THROUGH FOES he will gladly put Gale on the slab to see what happens though LMAO

[mewsynk]

The infamous audio interface that has been causing me all sorts of problems. Might just bite the bullet and buy the mixer and pay my car insurance late but I'm not sure cause I'm gonna need tires soon 😬 😭 😣 not having this mixer blows but it's something I'm trying to get through I also want to apologize to my gaming partners for not being so talkitive or active on IG, I know I haven't posted in a while I feel so overwhelmed some times. Gaming hasn't been the same for me in a while. I don't know how to explain it, before gaming was a placing for me to feel comfortable but I feel out of place and very overwhelmed Most games don't interested me and once I get a game I want, I hard have time to play or I'm super exhausted mentally and physically they online game I've been interested in is Dungeon and Dragons 5e and a few others but finding a group online is been tough I've been wanting to find a place local to play but they only play I know of around Corona is playlive Nation at the Tyler mall but I feel overwhelmed and I feel like its to loud of a setting for DND I want to make a podcast and stream the adventures I have and be immersed the campaign with music and sounds for the setting and not music thats radio music I've just been overwhelmed with alot and feel out of place Gaming partner @xnngaming @shariban.c Retro buds @joshi_64 @ccstellarsweets #audiointerfaceproblems #audioprobelms #mewsynk #mentalhealthawareness #itsokaynottobeokay #togetherasone #dndislife #gaminglife #mylifeasagamer #findingmyplaceislife #stayingpossitive #gamersunite #gamersofinstagram #joinmeonmyadventure (at Corona, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/B2yUd1QHiG2/?igshid=oc4ayoy4uay2

[courtoflilacs]

You should do all the ask from the ask prompt 😉

shit Thanks anon i’ll do my best and i appreciate the ask 💕💕💕rose: what makes you feel beautiful? highlighter,giant heels,gold anything, flower crowns, and freckles lace: how would you describe your best friend(s)? Beth: Strong and outgoing. Undeniably beautiful and uniquely herself. She is the definition of a leo and i would be heart broken without her. Amy: Wonderful and kind. The mom friend forever and always. She reminds me of the feeling after thunder storms and i would die for her. (i have other best friends too but i’ll limit myself to my college ones) wish: what are your favourite memories? -Sitting on the docks at wingra in the summer -jumping into the lake in the thunder storms at eagle lake -sitting on the floor talking about our OCs heaven: describe your ideal dateGoing to a art gallery or an aquarium and just taking a million pictures of them being cute and going to like a tiny café or some bomb ass reasturant and then going home and having a kiss/cuddle partyangel: what is your dream aesthetic?Leather and lace/ satin and steal. That very soft vibe mixed with a hard edge.wings: list five things you love about yourself-my prominent ass bone structure -Doll lips -good sense of style-not afraid of conflict -my out goingness marble: what do you look for in a partner?Someone who makes me feel safe, doesn’t feel awkward to talk to for more then 5 minutes, loves physical affection, good sense of humor, and has the same views as mevelvet: describe your dream homeThe big yellow farm house with lavender in the flower boxes. Overlooks the ocean and gives off a nastolgic feel to everyone who looks upon on it. pearl: what is your favourite: scent, flavour, sound, texture?Scent: Lilacs and clean linen flavor: Cinnamon or salty sweet sound: A rushing stream texture: soft smooth. sunlight: list five things you find to be beautiful-Freckles -full eyebrows -kindness -strength, both physical and mental-confidence cherry: what words of advice would you give to a stranger?Walk with your head held high like you don’t have a care in the world and you are the strongest person here. blush: describe your ideal futureOwning a small farm and being known as a probable witch but no one cares bc i make the best bake goods in the area sea: what music, art and/or literature brings you peace?Literature wise i like stories about family exploring magical stuff with no romance and soft poetry. Music that brings me peace is soft indie and stuff that reminds me of the forrest wine: talk about something you are looking forward toI’m so excited to go to the mall this weekend!!! I’m going with my friends and it’ll be so funnn. I’m gunna dress up my pals and try on so many cute things honey: what do you do to relax?Listen to music or asmr. I also like to do personality quizzes silk: describe your most recent dream😅that’s a little R rated for this blog tbh. It involved me and a girl. I’ll leave the rest up to y’alls imagination matte: what is something you are proud of?My DND campaign that i wrote by myself gloss: list ten songs you love right now1) daft pretty boys -bad suns 2) holy ghost - børns 3) rose colored boy - paramore 4)caroline (side B) - all time low 5) Africa- Toto 6) cold cold man- saint motel 7) 20 dollar nose bleed - FOB8) the moss- cosmo sheldrake 9) furr - blitzen trapper 10) The village- Wrabel satin: what never fails to make you happy?Music, being ridiculous with my friends, cuddlingopal: talk about your interests and passionsThe adventure zone is my main hyper focus right now !! It’s amazing !! everyone go listen to it. It features amazing ass story telling and a diverse set of characters. On that note i’m also super into DND right now and learning/growing as a DM. It’s my first time but i’m so in love with the story telling aspect and i love role playing with my players. kiss: what do you want from life right now?To be happy