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captnjacksparrow · 3 years

Note

Hi! It's me again!

I've always shipped SNS from the beginning. Always. And reading your posts made me ship them even more to the point where it's one of the only pairings I ship in the Narutoverse! And I've always had this question burning in the back of my head. (Now, I don't know if you've already answered this or not so bear with me) I hope this isn't a stupid question.

Why, in your opinion, did Naruto never give up on Sasuke? (That might seem like a dumb question but I'm very curious) I've always wondered why he didn't. Maybe I just wasn't paying enough attention to the anime or something.

I mean, think about it. The people around him that he trusted wanted him to give up on Sasuke. I mean, even his friends were giving up! So I wanted to know why he never gave up. And what made him forget the promise he made to Sakura to him wanting to personally save him himself? (Again, those two questions seem stupid but I'm just really curious!) I don't know if you already answered these in previous posts but it's always worth it to give it a shot.

Like, it always confused me. And if Pinky always loved him since childhood, why couldn't she do anything to help bring back Sasuke? She just Naruto to do all the work and seem shocked when he wants to personally save him himself.

(Ok, this question is all over the place, I hope this isn't too confusing for you! Thank you for taking the time to read it and maybe answer it!)

Wonderful Ask!!! @dead-deadashell ... Sorry for the delayed response and that’s because I don’t know the true answer to your question at that time and after a careful thought, I found one.

Why Naruto never gave up on Sasuke?

There may be many reasons....

In the Part 2 Sasuke Reunion Arc, When Sai asks Naruto, “But Why?... It’s not like you have been ordered to do this!!”.

To which Naruto says, “He is the person that, more than anyone else accepted me and my existence.... Sasuke is my friend... He represent the bond that I waited for so long to receive... So, That’s why”.

Even Itachi himself asked Naruto, “Why are you so Obsessed with my Brother?”

Naruto said, “That’s because I consider him as a Brother more than you ever did”.

And there are many instances Sasuke himself asked Naruto, “Why do you go so far for me?”.... This is Sasuke’s way of asking “Why are you not giving up on me? Why are you coming in my way again and again and hurting yourself?”

Naruto always replies with, “Because we’re friends” or “To me, You represent a Bond that I waited for so long”, “Because I’m your one and only Friend”.

It may be any one of the reasons above... And all the reasons are 100% valid.

But In my opinion, the true answer lies in the very simple and unnoticed panels in the Manga. But before that.

As we can see in the above panels, Naruto felt completely betrayed when Sasuke was really trying to kill him.

“In the End, Maybe It was just me who thought we were friends... But then, that would make me so Stupid... Sasuke”

Naruto thinks that Sasuke never really considered him as a friend and that his one-sided Friendship makes him feel so Stupid.

It’s like Naruto felt acknowledged by Sasuke and he thought they became friends. But then when he find that Sasuke was trying to kill him with no second thoughts, Naruto just went heart-broken here which is evident from the way he was crying.

And yet Naruto doesn’t want to give up.

Well, Naruto never giving up is not something new. He did it many times over and over.

He never wanted to give up taking the Tenth Question in the Chunin Exams Paper Test.... Why?? Because he doesn’t want to run away.

He never wanted to give up fighting against Gaara in Part 1 even though it will cost him his life. Why?? Because Sasuke acknowledged Naruto’s strength. And he also wanted to protect Sasuke and sakura.

He never wanted to give up on fighting for Tsunade infront of Kabuto... Why?? Because he wanted to prove her that he is worthy enough to carry on the Hokage title. Also, by proving this, he can bring her back to the Village and cure Sasuke, Kakashi, Lee.

He never wanted to give up fighting Pain... Why?? Because he wanted to protect the Village... He wanted to end the cycle of Hatred by carrying on Jiraiya’s Will.

He never wanted to give up fighting Obito in the war even though he provoked Naruto to give up many times.... Why?? Because he wanted to end the war.

So, there is a set reason for why Naruto never gives up doing what he does on different situations he was put under. And yet when it comes to Sasuke, his reason varies from time to time. Even though, Sasuke himself wants Naruto to give up on him, and yet Naruto still couldn’t.

Why??

The reason is...

No... It’s not the acknowledgement part.... It’s those beautiful sentence in the top left panel....

“I don’t know why ”

Yes... Naruto doesn’t know why he doesn’t want to give up on Sasuke.

なんでかわからないけど Nande ka wakaranai kedo I don't know why....

And this is not the first time Naruto says he doesn’t know why he was going so far for Sasuke. He said it again in VoTE2 as well.

それ説明しろって言われても...オレも正直...よく分かんねェょ. そんなの… ただお前のそゆ...背負ってゴチゃゴチャしてるとこ見てっと...なんでか... ...オレが...痛てんだ

Sore setsumei shiro tte iwa rete mo... Ore mo shōjiki... Yoku wakanne yo. Sonna no… Tada omae no so yu... Seotte gochagocha shiteru toko mitetto... Nande ka...Itenda…

Even if I were to say that explanation.. I still honestly… don’t properly understand…that kind of thing… It’s just that you…I see that (you) are being burdened with complaining about doing various things, endlessly.…For some reason…I…am pained…

The word,

“For some reason”

This word choice “For some reason” carries the very similar meaning to “I don’t know why”... we’ve seen from the above panel.

This is actually a Romantic Trope... Like we don’t know why we are doing it but for some reason, we want to do it... because of ‘certain’ unexplainable feelings. If N & S really felt like they are just friends or brothers... This word ‘For some reason, I don’t know why’ would never exist. Because Brotherly and Friendly bonds have their feelings and reasons clearly drawn.

I am not saying they were romancing when they were just 8. It’s just that they both had ‘certain’ child-like mutual attraction towards each other. But even after they turned 17, they still couldn’t figure out ‘Why they are feeling certain way about each other’.

If they were just Friends or Brothers, they would’ve already figured it out. Because Sasuke is someone who really had a Brother, he knows how it feels like. And Naruto literally acted like a Big Brother to Inari and Konohamaru. And Naruto is someone who found many friends by the end of the series and he also knew how it feels like. And yet they don’t have a proper term to define their ‘Feelings’.

Since it’s something that cannot be ‘explained’ or ‘said out loud’.... They clearly Love each other in a non-brotherly or just-friendly way. We can call this as a Soulmate Bond (with some subtle romantic undertones).

Well, I’ve always said in many of my posts, Love needs a reason. We should know why we like that person otherwise it’s simply called infatuation which comes from Physical Attraction.

So, Naruto and Sasuke doing things for each other without knowing the exact reason. How is this not infatuation??

It is not.....

Because

This is it... ‘Loneliness’ is the reason, they start to notice each other in the first place. And that’s why it’s not called Infatuation.

Both Sasuke and Naruto don’t understand why they are doing what they are doing for each other. It’s just that both of their body and mind seems to be moving on it’s own whenever they see their significant other was suffering. And that’s why Naruto couldn’t give up on Sasuke.

And this is precisely why I couldn’t find the answer for why Naruto never gave up on Sasuke. Because the character in question (Naruto) himself don’t know why he couldn’t give up.

It may not be a satisfying answer to your question @dead-deadashell ..... But I truly believe this is the answer. I’ve seen many people say the reason was because Naruto was a lonely kid, Sasuke was the first one to Notice him and that’s why he couldn’t let him go. And that is also true. I really wanted to write that as an answer.

But if that was the real reason, when Sasuke asked ‘Why are you getting in my way? Why did you go that far for me?’..... Naruto could’ve easily said, “Remember the first time we met near the Lake Pier..... You were the first person to notice me. How can I lose the First person who acknowledged my existence?”.... But Naruto never said this was the reason he never gave up...

When Sasuke gave up his life in the Land of the Waves for Naruto, both of them were not acquainted properly. They had very minimal conversation. And they weren’t even Friends, to be honest. And yet Sasuke’s body moved on its own for no reason. Naruto evoked Kyuubi Chakra for the first time. Like all those years when the Villagers treated Naruto poorly, he could’ve easily released Kyuubi Chakra because of the Extreme Rage he amassed during his childhood just like Gaara. And yet Sasuke’s death was the first time Naruto experiences such an immense Rage.

We all know why Naruto considers Iruka as his Important person.... because in Episode 1 Iruka acknowledged him as an Excellent Student and also as a person who belongs to the Village of Konoha. That changed Naruto and stopped him from taking revenge. Naruto evoking Kyuubi Chakra for Iruka will not be surprising. Whereas Sasuke hadn’t yet acknowledged Naruto at that point of time.

How Naruto could pull such a strong reaction for a boy who just smiled at him but barely became friends with??

Why Naruto couldn’t give up even after Sasuke rammed him with his Chidori which could kill him?

Why Naruto couldn’t give up even after realizing the ‘Friendship’ he thought he had with Sasuke was one-sided? It’s like, “Even though you consider me as someone irrelevant, even though you don’t acknowledge me... I am still going to save you from the danger”...

When I asked myself all the above questions, I can’t able to find the exact reason just like how Naruto couldn’t. Because there is none. And that’s why we call this as an Extremely Unconditional Love that Transcends beyond everything.

What made him forget the promise he made to Sakura to him wanting to personally save him himself?

From the beginning, that promise was not about Sakura. That Promise was just an added accessory. It’s like you want to start a business and someone with the very similar ideas like yourself decided to partner up with you. Same thing happened between Sakura and Naruto. Naruto already got panicked when he heard about Sasuke leaving the Village.

He already made up his mind to rescue Sasuke. Sakura just joined later and put some non-sensical promise on him. That promise is something he wanted to make it for himself before everyone in order to not falter from saving Sasuke.

If that promise was all about Sakura, then Naruto should have made some reference about Sakura in VoTE1 & VoTE2 before Sasuke. Because Naruto is a person who always speaks for others. Namely,

Here, Naruto was speaking to Zabuza about Haku’s feelings. He is making Zabuza understand about Haku and his sacrifice.

Similarly, Naruto was talking to Obito about how Rin would feel about the current dream of Obito.

If that stupid promise was all about Sakura, then why Naruto never mentioned about Sakura and her feelings to Sasuke in VoTE1 and VoTE2????

Imagine Naruto saying, “Do you know how Sakura feels about you? She really loved you. Don’t you feel anything??” ***Insert Puke noises***

Why didn’t he say that??? Instead, Naruto only talks about his own feelings to Sasuke in both of the battles.

So, That promise was all about Naruto and his bond with Sasuke. Sakura is just a traveller who travelled along with Naruto’s journey for a while and then later she decided to take a different path and asked Naruto to abandon his journey. To which Naruto said, “That promise has nothing to do with you... I want to personally save Sasuke”

From Narrative point of view, Sakura acts as a good beard for Naruto. Because if Naruto alone chases after Sasuke, then that would obviously gives off a blatant Homosexual Vibes. Add Sakura and her stupid promise to the mixture.... No one would ever doubt it.... And hilariously back then when that Chapter was released, when Naruto said, it was not about the promise he made with Sakura.... even non-shippers found that Arc was Gayer.

Why couldn't she do anything to help bring back Sasuke?

Because she never put any effort in trying to understand Sasuke and his heart. She just desire him physically.

To help someone, we need to understand and trust that person. She neither understood nor trusted Sasuke completely. So, that’s why she couldn’t help in bringing back Sasuke. Whereas, Naruto desperately tried to understand Sasuke at every given chance...

Look at the difference!!!!

I am leaving this at here.

So, you asked me why Naruto never gave up on Sasuke....

“It’s because Naruto found Sasuke and started to like him for a reason that binds them together, that is, Loneliness. And after that everything he did for Sasuke is something that was out of his own control or reason or logic or explanation. The reasons he gave to everyone as to why he can’t give up on Sasuke are just an afterthought or a mere excuse.

Because, Naruto himself don’t know why couldn’t give up on Sasuke and it was all his subconscious doing.

How Unconditional!!!”

#sns #sasunaru #narusasu #sasunarusasu #Naruto always wanted to save Sasuke for himself

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hqshine · 3 years

Text

—Realising their feelings for you—

characters: Nishinoya, Tsukishima, suga

genre: angst to fluff?

type: headcanon

extras: wrote this cause i was in my angst feels guys, it’s raining what a mood. Anyways i’ve already seen all the requests and it’s gonna come slowly sorry ^^ Also i’m thinking about creating a tag list, if you’re interested please drop a message!

The two of you were close friends

both mature yet childish and stubborn at the same time

you’ve always felt differently with suga

sure he was your go to friend for any of your troubles and you’ve shared secrets with him that it almost felt like he was more of a best friend

but your heart always skipped a beat around him

he was always welcome to physical affection

When the team has movie nights, they would invite their unofficial member, you

during movies, suga would hold your hand or hug your waist loosely while you slept on his chest

which always made your heart flutter and you couldn’t even focus on the movie infront of you

but you’ve always known that Suga never felt the same that you did

He’d always tell you about a girl from this other class

She was pretty, smart, mature, reliable, kind

he would say

you’ve always kept quiet about your feelings, even giving him advice when he consulted you about confessing to her

One morning, suga came up to you. “I finally asked her out” he smiled brightly

your smile dropped and your heart raced

we’re you hearing him correctly

yes, you’ve always known that one day he was going to find someone

even her

but you just

didn’t expect it

“She said yes, Y E S y/n. God i’m so happy” suga exclaimed

his smile was the only thing that kept you from breaking down in class

“i’m happy for you Suga, last long” that was the last sentence you said to him

it’s been a few weeks, close to a month now

you knew avoiding him was...immature

but listening to him ramble about her, was gut wrenching

you saw them a few times, walking down the hallway, in her classroom

Suga tried reaching out to you but never did you meet his eyes once in the past few weeks

but recently your phone has been buzzing more than ever

it’s been irritating you and you’ve hardly touched it after suga started dating her

you sighed once more as another notification was sent in, telling you that you missed someone’s call and that they left you a voice mail

you opened up your phone and your eyes widened at all the messages from Suga

you played his most recent recording

“Hey y/n i know we aren’t exactly talking now...well s-she wasn’t exactly honest. I guess to her using me to make her ex jealous was such a great idea. I-i’m sorry that i’m the reason we haven’t been talking much. Ah, i-i also heard from someone about your—your feelings for me and i know this isn’t the best way to tell you, but i’ve been thinking a lot about it. I missed you these past few weeks. A lot. more than you can ever imagine. I missed your smile, your rambles about the lasted mangas you’ve been reading about, your homemade bentos you shared with me, your laugh, everything. You know what this wasn’t a good idea—i bet you won’t even talk to me after this. I’m sorry for not seeing it before, that the girl i really liked. Was you”

Your eyes widened as your phone slipped from your hand

his voice was shaky and it was obvious that he had been crying but, his message was still clear as day

You ran, all the way to his house

“C-come out” you panted into the call

“Y/n—y/n? wha?” suga said as you heard shuffling in the background

he quickly exited, and met with you

Your hair was messy, you were sweating in your hoodie and pajamas pants but you were still gorgeous, how he had never looked at you clearly before he would never understand

Suga immediately wrapped his arms around you and nuzzled into your shoulder

“I-in your voicemail, is it really true, do you really like me?” you asked him softly, your eyes welling up with tears

Suga looked up from your shoulder and and hugged your cheeks with his palms

“I know, i know it hasn’t been long since i dated her. But please give me a chance, please wait a little longer” he pleaded

You wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing him close

“I will” you whispered

“Kiyoko-senpai, you’re so gorgeous as usual” Nishinoya exclaimed along with Tanaka, both following her around like a puppy

You bit your lip, looking down at your sketchbook instead to distract yourself from the pain

Harbouring feelings for the second year libero hasn’t been easy

Constantly hearing him compliment other girls, comparing yourself, new insecurities

you didn’t understand why you liked him to be very honest

but you were also lying to yourself

His energy, his comfortable vibe, his smile and his eyes made you fall head over heels with Nishinoya

“Y/n-chan, what’re you drawing today?” he shouted, coming up to you

“i’m not sure yet Noya-kun” The two of you were best friends since you two were young

He defended you against middle school bullies and the two of you have been inseparable ever since

You realised your feelings for him after coming into High school

which was when his crush for your senpai began

You had nothing against Kiyoko-senpai, she actually gave you some advice and helped you several times with your homework

but, it wasn’t nice hearing him compliment her, as selfish as it sounded, you wanted on of his compliments to be directed to you

After training, You and Nishinoya walked back home together since the two of you lived near each other

“Yuu?” you asked him as he hummed in reply

Your heart pounded, “c-can i tell you something”

it was now or never you thought.

He nodded and focused on what you were going to say, “I liked you since we entered high school”

Nishinoya’s eyes widened and he stopped in his tracks

you looked down, twiddling with your fingers

“i know you like Kiyoko-senpai, but it was something i just had to tell you because i didn’t want to risk our friendship.” you flashed a fake smile to him

“don’t worry, i never expected you to return my feelings. this won’t change anything, i promise. So, you can still continue to like senpai” you mumbled, feeling the tears pooling at your eyes

The whole time, Nishinoya didn’t say anything

his mouth was agape but he just couldn’t find the right words

you sighed, and walked away not before saying, “Have a nice holiday noya-kun” flashing him a fake smile

he could see your tears and he noticed your smile that was different

Nishinoya stood there, thinking about what you just said.

he closed his eyes and the memory of your tear stained face filled him with guilt

he knew he couldn’t return your feelings but, why did he feel so sad when you said “nothing is going to change”

The break wasn’t very, enjoyable

you worked different part time jobs while Nishinoya attended trainings

the amount of times he let the ball from the opposite team his the ground was uncountable

he could barely focus and he just stared as the ball hit the ground for the tenth time

everyone groaned, noticing how their libero wasn’t paying attention

he had even stopped giving out compliments to the beautiful manager during that time

the only thing on his mind was you

training ended early that day, as they wrapped up and Nishinoya apologised for not doing well

you blew out a breath of smoke as you stared at the christmas tree infront of you

It was huge and reminded you of the joyous occasion that was arriving

Usually, you and Nishinoya would be playing at the park, having snowball fights, making angels and snowmans, and falling sick together later on

You haven’t spoken to him since that day, because of your busy schedule and his trainings

You hid your hands in your pocket, noticing how cold it was

“Y/n” a familiar voice called out to you

You turned around to widen your eyes at the sight of Nishinoya slightly panting and in his training clothes

“N-noya? What’re you doing here, aren’t you cold?” he shook his head

taking out his gloves and reaching for your hand

“You always forget your gloves don’t you, ever since middle school” he slightly laughed at the memories

“i don’t like them, they aren’t comfy” you pouted and looked away

Nishinoya held your hands, “Y/n” you looked back at him

“it hasn’t been the same. Now everyday has been boring, distracting because i keep thinking about you.” he said

“i know i’ve always expressed my ‘love’ for Kiyoko-senpai, but the person that i really love is you” your eyes widen yet again. You shook your head

“No Noya, she’s perfect, good grades, the best looks, reliable, mature, kind? Why would you like me when you have her” you said sadly

“Kind, loyal, fierce, immature, stubborn, adorable, caring, beautiful, intelligent” he began listing

“Y/n, i love you and not because you’re perfect, you have qualities that make you, you. Qualities that i love about you. Most importantly, you’re you. The girl i had a crush on since middle school, since you offered me that star wars bandage after i defended you. I’m sorry for not realising it sooner, but please, let me make it up to you” Nishinoya said

his showed his desperation and his voice expressed his love for you

“of course, and i love you too yuu”

You were always by his side

you’d greet him good morning at the lockers and even sent him home

Tsukishima hated it

he found you annoying

like a leech he can’t get rid of no matter what

you didn’t know how exactly did you fall deeply for the cold beanpole but you certainly liked him a lot

from his honey blonde hair, his taste in music, his intelligence, sassy comments and precious rare smiles

you’ve always tried to get him to notice you, making him bentos, reaching school early to greet him and even following him home after his trainings

one day

“Tsukki, i like you, would you please go out with me?” you confessed to him. Your blush could not get any redder as you bowed

Tsukishima scoffed

“with you? seriously?” your hopes fell as you stood up but looked away

“i would rather date the king rather than you. You’re annoying and if i could get rid of you, i would’ve done it earlier” he spit out

each word stabbing you deep in the heart

he turned around and left

you glanced at the macarons you made for him and the letter that you had written

they were all dinosaur themed, hoping to gain more of his attention

You were crying by then

he really thought you were nothing but someone annoying

From that day on, you hardly spoke to him

Everyday tsukishima would turn up expecting to see your face again, but you were no where to be found

in the beginning, he was satisfied, realising he was able to chase you away. But slowly, he realised how disappointed he felt when he didn’t hear you greeting him and the sight of your adorable smile adorning your face

he realised he finally chased you away

now he walks home alone, whenever he turns around unconsciously you weren’t there, he could only feel your presence in his memories

“Tsukki wait for me!”

“Good morning Tsukki, i made you some cookies today”

Tsukishima sighed as he packed up his books, he was too lazy to buy his food at the cafeteria and you didn’t prepare anything for him so he could only starve till school was over

“Tsukki i heard some boy asked Y/n out” this gained Tsukishima’s attention as Yamaguchi returned from the vending machine with drinks

“i was buying the drinks when i overheard them” yamaguchi said

tsukishima didn’t do anything except for opening his drink

“tsukki you should talk to Y/n” yamaguchi advised. “She hasn’t been herself lately and the whole class feels it too”

Tsukishima took a sip of his drink

“Tsukki, are you okay with some other guy taking care of her?” Yamaguchi questioned him

that was what made tsukishima put down his drink

jealousy was all he felt

he didn’t like the thought of someone else making you smile, making you laugh. What if you left forever? for another guy?

Tsukishima immediately left to find you and dragged you away from the guy

“what are yo-?” you exclaimed as tsukishima slammed you against the lockers and placing his hand next to the locker beside you

“i take it back” he said

You were confused, “i missed you, i realised my true feelings when i didn’t have you. I need you, please give me a chance. i like you Y/n” he says

you smiled as you hesitantly wrapped your arms around him

“One chance”

#haikyuu #hq #hq x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fanfiction #hq x reader fluff #sugawara x reader #suga x reader #koushi x reader #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x reader angst #hw angst to fluff!au #tsukishima angst #nishinoya angst #nishinoya x reader #nishinoya fluff #sugawara angst #☀️

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after-witch · 3 years

Text

Big City (Yandere Shigaraki x Reader)

Title: Big City [Yandere Shigaraki x Reader]

Synopsis: You’re about to leave for a new university in a new city in a new country. Your friend doesn’t seem pleased. You agree to meet up before you leave in the hopes of keeping your friendship alive.

For request: hi can I request one with maybe yandere dabi or shigaraki (upto you) with a darling who almost barks at them when they get kindapped cause they were about to get into their dream college and were about to fulfill their lifelong dream and now because of the situation its ruined. Like they worked so hard all their life for it. How would they react?

Word Count: 2000-ish

notes: yandere, kidnapping

You mindlessly check your messages for what feels like the tenth time in the last hour, despite knowing what you'd find: no response from Tomura. It was... unusual. A little worrying. But mostly, it was frustrating. You had too much on your plate to deal with managing his moods right now, or managing anything but arranging your flight and your luggage and confirming your schedule for the upcoming university semester.

To say that Tomura had been unusually quiet and unresponsive since you gave him the news would be an understatement. You didn't think it would matter that much. Your friendship was purely online, anyway; he'd shut down the idea of meeting in person, saying he was too shy about his appearance. But you didn't mind.

You gamed, you texted, you send each other screenshots of people saying ridiculous things online. You talked over the phone about, well, everything. Truthfully, he was your closest friend, though that wasn't saying much. Your family wasn't in the picture, and you found it hard to get close to anyone, found it hard to open up to others.

So when you immediately called him after reading your acceptance letter, gushing about the news, his lack of a response was... deflating. But, you chalked it up to Tomura being... Tomura. Sometimes he got moody or seemed to get annoyed by ordinary things. He gave you a 2-day silent treatment for boasting about getting the autograph of your favorite hero. But you had learned how to navigate his moods for the most part, but it was hard to manage anything when he wouldn't even respond.

You're about to close the app when a message suddenly pops up:

Hey. Sry I haven't been talking. Kind of going through stuff. Since your leaving.... can we meet in person before you go? Just lunch. I'll pay. (Maybe)

Your fingers shake a little above the screen. A first meeting? Now? Right before you leave? You think back to your late night gaming sessions, your conversations, the closeness you feel between you and think--why not?

*You're And... yes. (NOT MAYBE) Where do you want to go?

You lean your back against the brick of the shopping complex and pull out your phone. Tomura had named the time, the place--and asked if you could meet up behind the complex where it would be empty. You agreed, of course. You know that he's shy. Maybe he wanted to meet you without crowds around first. He's a few minutes late so you pull up your messages, thumbing through them without much thought. You're bored. You switch over to your email and recheck your flight schedule, the gate times, the rules and luggage limitations. You've read them a thousand times but each reread brings you closer to a much longed-for reality: an overseas university with a stellar reputation and a practical guarantee of a job in the field after graduation. Sometimes you could hardly believe it.

You're contemplating taking a selfie when a voice suddenly speaks from behind you, distinct and firm.

"Finally."

Before you can turn, before you can think, you feel a sudden grip on your arm--and everything goes black.

You wake up some time later. Your head feels fuzzy, your vision slightly off, like you've been napping too hard. Maybe you have, you think, as your vision clears. But you're not in your stripped down bed in your packed-up apartment.

You blink and blink and take in a bedroom that you've never seen. It's messy, wrappers, cans, paper plates strewn about. The air smells stale. You look down and realize you're sitting on a mattress on the floor. Your hand slips into your pocket for your phone, but it’s not there. Shit.

Your back is pressed up against the wall which is perfectly fine, because it's then that you see someone sitting on the other end of the mattress.

You jerk back with a start, but there's nowhere to go. The person--a man, you quickly note--is sitting with their legs crossed. Their face is obscured by a dark hoodie and messy hair and you don't even think before you shout out the first words which spring to mind:

"What the fuck?"

The figure gives a chuckle, dry and short. "Sorry. Had to do it this way. Guess you're not used to Kurogiri's quirk, huh."

His voice makes you feel strange. It sounds familiar. It's something you've heard before. On TV, maybe or--oh. Oh.

"Tomura?" The query comes out high-pitched, almost whining. You're in disbelief. It has to be--

Tomura, and his reaction seals it, it definitely is Tomura, practically giggles as he breaths out a sigh. It's an odd sound coming from an imposing figure, but is it really an imposing figure if it's your friend?

He raises his face and the hoodie shifts downward. Your eyes are drawn to his lips, chapped and a bit scabbed over. You want to cringe when he pulls his lower lip back to bite on some of the dry skin.

"Tomura," you say, letting out shaky breaths of your own as the reality of where you are and what's going on begins to seep in, "Tomura, what’s going on? Did I pass out in the parking lot?" He brought you here, maybe. Maybe the blackness was you blacking out and hitting the pavement and that's why your head feels funny and Tomura just brought you to his house because he's so shy that he didn't want to get the attention of the staff at the shop or the police or any random passerby on the street who for some reason didn’t see him dragging you along or--

Your thoughts still race as he snorts. He relaxes a little, his shoulders slumping as he scooches a little closer on the mattress.

"You seriously don't recognize my face?"

You feel your own face scrunch in confusion. Of course you don't recognize his face. Tomura never sent you pictures. He said he was too shy. And, you don't mean to be mean, but you can kind of see why, because--oh. Oh fuck. Oh fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

You get it. And he gets that you get it, because he's got this sort of sour smirk on his face as you inwardly ask yourself what in the flying fuck was going on with your life if a notorious villain secretly befriended you then kidnapped you then brought you to his bedroom of all places.

"I don't..." The fuzzy feeling is back as your neck begins to ache and you swear a migraine is coming on. "I don't..." You don't finish, you can't finish.

"You don't what," he spits out, annoyed and frustrated and whereas before his frustration was something for you to manage and recede with silly pictures or playful chiding, for the first time it makes you nervous and you shrink your shoulders in.

"I don't--I'm not," you finally say, you finally do spit out, "I'm not anyone important. I don't know if you're looking for a ransom or... whatever it is you want, but you know I don't have anyone who will pay it."

He scratches at his scalp and sighs, and you recognize in the tone that he's calmed down, somewhat. At least you have that going for you, sitting in the apparent bedroom of a villain. Speaking of--you eye his hands. He follows your look and shoves them in his pockets before speaking.

"You were leaving." He looks away and itches his cheek. "Going to some fancy foreign school. What would you even need that shit for, anyway?"

You stare at him. This feels like a conversation that could have been had, say... over text, not after kidnapping you from behind a cafe.

"It's my dream. I told you about it all the time. I worked my ass off to get a spot at that school."

The numbness of anxiety has begin to edge away and you cross your arms. You don't want to look scared. Or mad. You try to look normal, you try to think normally, because if there's any way you're going to get out of this situation, you have to remain calm.

You try to imagine that it's 3 am and you're talking on the phone, having an argument, a testy patch of friendship. But it's hard to ignore that he's a villain who brought you here for some unknown reason; a villain who got you to trust him (but why?) and talk to him (but why?) and fuck, how many private things had you told him in the middle of the night? So many texts and emails and late night conversations.

It suddenly dawns on you that you don't know how long you were out. You have a plane to catch and luggage to finish and you're here instead. You take a breath in the hopes of further steadying your nerves. You look at Tomura, who has been watching you for the past minute with an impassive, hard-to-reach expression.

He doesn't seem to be... threatening. He didn't try to hurt you or threaten to hurt you. Maybe, maybe this was a case of... you know how things can be online. How people can get obsessively attached. Maybe he thought you were dating. Maybe he had a crush and didn't express it and years of isolation made it impossible for him to just y'know, talk to you like a normal person. He's awkward and shy and inappropriate and okay, okay, okay. You can work with this. You've had your fair share of online... situations. Like most people. You just have to deal with them with delicacy.

You breathe. You smile, a little. And you scooch just a bit closer to Tomura, whose eyes widen in surprise at your movements.

"So... Tomura?" Your voice is soft and placating and oh so very chill. The kind of voice you've used with him before, when he was being a grumpy ass-hat pissed off about losing to you in his favorite game.

"Yeah--Yeah?" He says, clearing his throat. You want to smile harder because you think oh, good, I've got him here.

You mimic his earlier movement and give your hair a little ruffle, a little scratch. "I guess we can just order delivery for lunch, huh? I have to be home by eight, so I can get my stuff together for my flight tomorrow." You give your lip a little gnaw, in a gesture that probably felt cuter in concept than execution. "Oh! Since I can stay a little later, we can totally game while we eat, right? I owe you a rematch for last time."

Saying all this, being so sweet and kind, acting like nothing has changed, feels really, really surreal. But you push through it because the best course of action with guys like these is to placate them and get them to let you go on your way, then ghost like hell once you're out of their reach. And what better way to ghost than to move to a completely different country?

He stares at you for a moment. You think he must have been expecting you to cry or yell or scream or call him a creeper. Which he probably is, but he doesn't need to know that you think that. At least not until you're safe. You see a quirk of a smile before he flat out begins to laugh. It's a hard laugh, a wheezing laugh, one that has him slapping his thigh. Your skin feels light and numb and your body begins to shake a little in uncertainty and anxiety and just a bit of anger.

And you can't help it, you have a mouth, you really do--

"What the hell is so funny!"

His laugh tapers off and he wipes a bit of drool from his lips (ew) before regarding you with an expression that seems wild and strange and definitely not the response you were expecting.

"Why would you need to catch a flight? You're not going anywhere."

His answer sends an instant ice-cold knot to your stomach. You huff out a breath. Maybe you can still salvage this, maybe.

“C’mon, Tomura.” Keep saying his name, you think. These types of people like it when you acknowledge them. “Don’t be silly. We’ll still talk and game everyday like we always do, and--”

Before you can think he’s suddenly right up against you, his arm pressed up practically against your ear as he looms over you, keeping you pinned to the wall. His eyes look manic and he’s smiling and it’s not a nice smile, but one full of hidden intentions that make your stomach drop and drop and drop.

“Don’t worry. We are going to talk and game everyday. As long as you’re good, anyway.”

You ignore the implications in his words--what does he mean good?--and try to argue, try to reason.

“But… the school… my degree…” You look up so you can blink away tears. You hate crying. “You know what it means to me. It’s my dream,” you whisper. He’s supposed to be your friend, why can’t he see that?

You instinctively begin to shake as you feel a finger pet your cheek. It’s supposed to be soothing, you think, but all you feel is icy anxiety and fear overtaking your nerves. He practically coos at you as he continues, his rough knuckle scratching you.

“Don’t worry. You can always think of a new dream.”

#yandere shigaraki #yandere tomura shigaraki #yandere #tomura shigaraki x reader #afterwitch writes

415 notes · View notes

qitwrites · 3 years

Text

traditions

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Pairing: Itadori Yuuji/Fushiguro Megumi

A/N: I caught up with the manga, and shit’s pretty fucked, so I decided to amend that with fluff.

[AO3 Link]

Fushiguro - according to Kugisaki - is the textbook definition of a homosexual disaster.

No see, here’s the thing- everything was going fine. Great. No problems at all. Fushiguro respects his seniors, tolerates Gojo, and has the biggest soft spot for Inumaki, but he’s never been attracted to any one in his usual circle. So, school and sorcery and life in general was simple. No distractions, no crushes as such, no complications. All good.

And then Itadori Yuuji barges into his life and upends the fuck out of it by eating a special grade cursed object to save him. Then he joins Jujutsu Tech, and now they work and train and study and live alongside one another.

The thing is, Itadori is cute as fuck. 10/10 would tap that, any day of any week.

It’s not that Fushiguro has a type or anything, but Itadori just ticks all his boxes. When Todo had bullheadedly asked him what kind of person he likes, he’d said anyone with a strong moral compass that doesn’t waver in their resolve.

That’s Itadori in a nutshell.

Also, doesn’t hurt that he’s like, stupidly hot either. His raw physical prowess is reflected on his body in the form of shapely muscles, hard abs, and wide forearms that look like they could pick Fushiguro up and just throw him like a javelin. They actually can- Itadori had to do it for a mission this one time. Fushiguro enjoyed it immensely, and he will take this information with him to his grave.

So, not only is Itadori attractive and strong and of good character, but he’s also hella friendly. Fushiguro knows he’s not the easiest person to befriend- it takes a while for him to warm up to people, to share things about himself, to talk about the shitshow that is his family, but Itadori does not seem to give a single, flying fuck. He walks into Fushiguro’s life with the strength and ease of someone that just believes they belong. And Fushiguro lets him, because he is, as Kugisaki very accurately put it, a complete and utter homosexual disaster.

But it’s fine. Crushes happen all the time, and Fushiguro knows it’s hopeless and that’s ok. He knows Itadori likes him and cherishes their friendship, and that is enough. It will be. He’ll move on, and they’ll laugh about it in a few years (if they survive) and it’ll be great. In the meantime, he’s going to hole up in his room and read non-fiction books and stay away from pink hair and large toothy smiles.

Of course, the first person to fuck up his plans is Itadori.

It’s Saturday night, and dinner had been a simple meal of rice, miso soup and some sides made by Itadori. He’s a really good cook, and the home food is such a welcome change from the bento boxes Fushiguro normally picks up from the convenience store. Sometimes, Itadori will drag Fushiguro into the kitchen to teach him a thing or two, and Fushiguro learns, and pines, and smacks Itadori when he says something especially idiotic. It’s routine. It’s nice.

Dinner was an hour ago, and now he’s just curled up in bed with his book. It’s shaping up to be a typical weekend, which is nice considering the number of missions they picked up last week. His bones are aching a little, his feet are slightly sore, and he knows he’s going to sleep like the dead tonight.

He hears the knock even though it’s a bit soft. Fushiguro sits up and cocks his head. Was he imagining it?

And then there’s another knock, more confident. Thud thud thud.

Fushiguro climbs out of bed, setting his book aside carefully. He stretches his hands over his head and walks over to the door. ‘Coming.’

He swings it open, and he sees pink hair and his heart just sort of beats out of his chest.

‘Hiya.’ Itadori’s smile is wide, trusting, and full of gusto. He holds a packet of chips in one hand and a laptop in the other.

‘What’s up?’

‘Are you busy?’

He should say he is. If he says he’s busy, then he doesn’t have to let Itadori in and he can continue with Operation: get over Itadori Yuuji. It’s the most logical move.

‘No, why do you ask?’ Well, apparently his brain has detached from his mouth.

‘Well, I overheard you telling Kugisaki that you’ve never seen the Saw movies and I realized something. Something terrible.’

Fushiguro tenses. ‘And what’s that?’

‘I can’t be best friends with someone that’s never seen Saw.’ Itadori pouts cutely, and Fushiguro is this close to just walking off the face of the Earth. He leans into the door frame, needing the additional support.

‘And I don’t want anyone else to be my best friend. So, the only solution is to make you watch Saw! With me! Like, right now.’

Fushiguro feels so much all at once- he wants to pull Itadori into a hug, he wants to jump off his balcony, he wants to slam the door shut and just cry, and he wants to watch stupid movies with this stupid man.

‘If you get crumbs on my bed, I’m going to kick you in the stomach.’

Itadori beams, and Fushiguro is a lost cause.

There’s a bit of adjusting (Fushiguro, your pillows are too hard, let me go grab mine) and a bit of remodelling (What do you mean we can’t make a blanket fort, that’s literally half the movie experience) and after relenting to a weird half-assed tent structure, the two of them huddle on the bed, backs against the wall, laptop placed on a chair by their feet with a bag of chips between them.

Saw is a terrible movie.

There’s gore and screaming and a creepy dude running around and it’s honestly just horrendous. The main character calls himself Jigsaw, and Fushiguro is tempted to flip the laptop after the hundredth blood spill. He looks over at Itadori who’s completely engrossed, eyes reflecting the colours and flashes of light on the screen. It’s cute, the concentration he’s pouring into it. His hand is stuck in the bag of chips and Fushiguro smacks it away to grab a few of his own.

Fushiguro does his best to watch and gets into it at least a little. It’s bad, but it’s not the worst way to spend a weekend night. He admits that a huge reason why the experience is kinda fun is that he’s doing something with Itadori that isn't life-threatening, which is a refreshing change.

The end credits start rolling and Itadori stretches his arms, fingers pushing through the droopy tent roof.

‘What did you think?’

‘I’ve seen worse.’

Itadori laughs. ‘I know what you mean. It grows on you though.’

‘There’s more?’

Itadori looks at him, blinks, cocks his head. ‘You didn’t know?’

Fushiguro shrugs. ‘I’ve never been a movie buff, so I have no information on this.’

‘Fushiguro.’

‘What?’

‘There’s 9 movies.’

Fushiguro’s mouth drops. ‘What?’

‘Yup, there’s nine in total, and the tenth one is in the making.’

‘Holy shit, that’s a lot of movies in one franchise.’

‘Yup. And we’re watching all of them.’

Fushiguro’s eyes widen. ‘What? No way. Nope. Not a chance. I can’t handle more of this, it was barely tolerable.’

‘It doesn’t matter! It’s the principle of the thing- you’ve started the series so you might as well see it through.’

‘9 movies? How can they possibly have enough content for that?’

‘It’s what they do. I promise it gets better and worse.’

Fushiguro sighs. ‘I’m not getting out of this, am I?’

Itadori pushes into his shoulder playfully. ‘Nope. I’m getting more snacks next time, let’s do two movies.’

Fushiguro sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

He’s really struggling to pretend like he’s upset with this development. He’s not upset. He’s honestly anything but.

---

Itadori comes back next Saturday with some blankets and a pillow tucked under one arm and a laptop in the other. He has a grocery bag with chips and sour patch kids hanging between his teeth and he still manages to smile. Fushiguro is so done.

‘Are you a dog?’ he grumbles, plucking the bag out of his face and setting it by the bed. Itadori gets to work immediately, setting up the pillows and his sad excuse for a blanket fort while Fushiguro brings a bowl for the chips and candy. Once they’ve settled in, Itadori starts the second movie and Fushiguro resigns himself to his fate.

It’s really not that bad.

The movie is whatever, Fushiguro tunes in and out, alternating between watching the screen and sneaking looks at Itadori. He’s as engrossed as ever, and the tip of his tongue is sticking out in concentration and it’s so cute it makes Fushiguro want to curl up in his lap and squish him.

He’s crushing hard. Like, really hard. It’s about the gayest thing he’s ever experienced.

The movie pushes on, and they start to get more comfortable. Itadori isn’t a talker, which is surprising and nice, but when the movie lulls, he does make a joke or two. They sink lower into the bed, and by the end of the movie, they’re firmly pressed into each other from shoulder to thigh, with the bowl of chips on Fushiguro’s lap and the candy in Itadori’s.

Itadori is really warm. Could be his natural body heat, could be the king of curses residing within him, could be Fushiguro’s imagination- who’s to say at this point?

When the credits roll, Itadori stretches again like a cat in the sun, groaning his satisfaction. Fushiguro rubs his temples and wills away his blush.

‘What did you think?’

‘Not terrible, but honestly, what the fuck?’

‘That pretty much sums up the franchise.’

Itadori loads up the next movie while Fushiguro stays in position, comfortable. When he’s done, he leans back and makes himself comfortable against Fushiguro’s side, head leaning against his shoulder, his cheek pressed against bone. He looks smooshed, and it’s ridiculous.

If he gave a single shit about the movie, he’d ask him to move because he’s so far gone now there’s no way he’d pay attention at all.

Fushiguro doesn’t say a word, just sends up a silent prayer that Itadori remains there, pushed into him and all up in his space, for the rest of the evening.

That’s exactly what he does.

---

Fushiguro’s feet are burning.

The soles are achy all over, tender and jolty. Any time he walks, he suppresses a hiss of pain. When he’d taken a look, the entire sole was an angry red, and he’s just so annoyed.

The week had been tough- tons of running around and multiple search and rescue missions and this one tenacious curse that he and Itadori had to chase for several miles before finally exorcising it. By the end of it all, his feet were burning like a low fire in the pits of hell.

Itadori is fine, as always. It’s probably an incredible combination of his own inherent athleticism and lord dipshit within him, but Itadori heals at an accelerated pace, and like, he came back from the dead. Sore feet would be nothing to this guy.

When Itadori knocks on the door as always, an hour after Saturday night dinner, Fushiguro just calls out, ‘Come in.’ He really doesn’t want to walk to the door, so he’d left it open intentionally.

Itadori struggles to open the door on his own, arms filled with so much stuff it’s overflowing everywhere, and that horribly lovely smile is still stretched across his face and Fushiguro is just so smitten it’s ridiculous.

Itadori throws a few pillows in his direction, places a frankly ridiculous amount of snacks at the foot of the bed, and starts building his fort. Fushiguro is yet to help him with this, to actually put in any effort and make it with him rather than just watch him with a bemused smirk, but part of him knows that if he joins in, he’s admitting to something. He’s admitting that he’s invested. That he likes this as much as Itadori, probably so much more. That he likes Itadori so much, it’s all-consuming.

Itadori gives him the laptop while he makes some finishing touches on the fort, and he’s gotten better over the last few weeks. The tent is less saggy, with more room to move around and its range is expanding. It no longer covers just the bed, it extends to his desk and is inching towards his closet. Itadori is taking over his room, his heart, his brain, his life. He keeps taking and taking and taking, and Fushiguro just gives him more, happily, heartbreakingly, with all the love and nonchalance and patience he can muster.

He’s so whipped he’s giving Kugisaki a headache. She’s told him as much, repeatedly.

He’s got the final Saw movie prepped and ready to go, positioning the laptop on the chair as usual. Itadori grabs the bowls and decants their snacks before sitting next to Fushiguro, his head automatically resting on the man’s shoulders. Fushiguro rests his head on Itadori’s soft pink hair, breathing in the scent of the shampoo Itadori always steals from Kugisaki, and muffles a laugh. It’s so silly.

They’re about mid-way through the movie (by movie 9 there’s no milking the plot, it’s them just beating a dead horse ruthlessly) when Fushiguro shifts his legs and his feet bump into the chair, and he bites out a yelp of pain. Itadori sits up immediately, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

‘You ok?’

Fushiguro waves him down, wincing. ‘Yes, yes, I’m fine, don’t worry about it.’

‘Did you stub your toe? That’s one of the worst feelings ever. And I’ve had my heart ripped out of my chest. And lost an arm. And I’ve been stabbed repeatedly. Amongst other things.’

‘I didn’t stub my toe. And also, what the fuck, are you ok?’

‘I’m fine,’ Itadori laughs easily. ‘Seriously, what’s wrong?’

‘My feet hurt,’ Fushiguro admits with a defeated sigh. ‘We’ve been moving about a lot, and after that pineapple fucker two days ago, my feet have just gotten really sore. I soaked them in hot water a few hours ago, I think I should be fine by Monday.’

Itadori eyes him suspiciously.

‘I’m not lying dumbass. I’ll be fine, don’t worry about it. Let’s just get this horrible movie over with.’

Itadori hums, turning back to the screen. A minute later, he looks over at Fushiguro.

‘Well, I’m going to apologize for this in advance.’

‘Apologize for wh- HEY!’

Itadori, with his stupidly inhumane strength, yanks Fushiguro’s legs off the edge of the bed and right into his lap. Fushiguro is now laying down with his head resting against the headboard, and he’s about to kick out when Itadori just digs his thumbs into the arch of his feet and Fushiguro narrowly stops himself from moaning obscenely.

He has died and ascended. His soul is no longer in this realm of existence. It has found peace. The meaning of life. Attained nirvana. He can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

It’s seriously that good.

Because Itadori is strong. He’s really strong, so his movements are sure and deep. His thumbs are pushing against the arch, into the heel of his foot, pushing into that junction where his toes meld into the sole, and it’s so damn good. Fushiguro squirms.

‘How are you- ah shit, right there -how are you so good at this?’

Itadori throws him an easy smile. ‘Used to massage grandpa’s feet all the time. Became an expert over time, especially because I had a lot of his nurses guiding me as well. Is it ok?’

Fushiguro tries to throw him a deadpan look but then Itadori’s thumbs just push into a particularly sore spot and Fushiguro’s eyes roll back into his skull. When he’s able to pull himself together, he looks at the pink-haired man, feeling breathless.

‘It feels great. If you tell a single soul, I will drop kick you.’

Itadori’s laugh is loud and boisterous, and it fills the room completely, saturates it with this feeling of ease and honesty.

‘This stays here, no worries. Like a Las Vegas thing.’

Fushiguro smiles at the stupid reference.

After a few minutes pass by, Fushiguro reluctantly starts pulling his feet away. ‘You’ve done more than enough,’ he starts to say. Itadori wraps his fingers around his ankles, holding him in place.

‘I can honestly do this for hours, it’s fine. You can see the screen, right?’ Fushiguro nods immediately. ‘So, let’s just keep watching. I’ll stop if I’m tired, ok?’

Fushiguro relents without a fight because it’s the most relief he’d gotten in ages, and Itadori is touching him and he’s weak in every possible way and he lets himself be. Just this once.

They finish the movie (thank goodness it’s over) and Itadori continues to massage his feet as they discuss what the 10th movie could possibly be like. They discuss theories and plot holes, and Itadori doesn’t let go, his hands inching up and massaging his calves as well, and fuck if Fushiguro’s going to stop him because it feels good. He’s gay and Itadori is hot and his fingers are actual magic- like, they put sorcery to shame.

When it’s well past midnight and Itadori yawns a few times, Fushiguro finally sits up, pulling his feet out of Itadori’s grasp. The pink-haired man lets his hands linger for as long as possible, and Fushiguro decides he’s just imagining it. Surely.

‘I kinda, I mean, I want to repay you for that. You massaged me for hours, you know.’

Itadori pretends to think for a second before breaking into a bright, 100-megawatt smile.

‘Well then, let’s watch more movies! Let’s just make this movie night! We can watch stuff you look up as well, we can watch anything.’

Fushiguro stares at him, stunned. He hadn’t been expecting that and truth be told, he was really sad the Saw franchise was over because he assumed that would be the end of this, and he was too shy to ask what Itadori was so easily asking him. To see Itadori so excited at the prospect of an actual movie night, with no end in sight, made his heart leap and throb and squeeze. It was incredible.

‘Deal.’ He keeps his voice level and his face neutral, but he can’t hide his eyes and Itadori reads him in a second and his smile softens. He knows him so well now, like the back of his hand.

Itadori bids him a soft goodnight, collecting his stuff and shuffling back to his room slowly. Fushiguro falls asleep quickly, and it's deep and dreamless.

He wakes up to painless feet. It’s a miracle in every single way.

---

When Itadori gently pulls his feet into his lap the next weekend, Fushiguro doesn’t bother protesting it. He just gives him a slightly exasperated sigh, a soft smile and hits play.

They’ve decided to pick up the How to train your dragon franchise this time, as a welcome change of pace.

‘What’s it about?’

‘Well, it’s honestly all in the title. It’s about dragons and Vikings and it’s funny and it has great music!’ Itadori lights up while talking about it, and his energy is so damn contagious. Fushiguro feels himself getting hyped. ‘I think you’ll like it. Especially since you have those cool Shikigamis, you might relate to this more!’

Fushiguro hums, and they watch. Fushiguro routinely pushes pieces of chips and sour candy into Itadori’s mouth, and Itadori’s fingers become well-acquainted with the planes and bumps and grooves of his feet, and the shape of his calves.

Fushiguro gets really into the movie.

Not only is the animation top-notch, but the voice actors are great, the storyline is gripping, and Toothless is so childish and sweet and endearing, his heart aches with love. He barely pays attention to Itadori this time. He seems just as invested, even if it’s the hundredth time he’s rewatching it.

To Fushiguro’s surprise, he chokes up at the end, after the big battle. The whole scene feels strangely familiar in some ways, and he tries desperately to hide his growing discomfort. He peaks over at Itadori and his eyes widen.

Itadori is swallowing hard, his eyes shining and glistening with unshed tears. His grip on Fushiguro is tight as hell, but not painful. He’s barely holding on, it seems.

So Fushiguro looks away, and lets himself feel. He doesn’t cry, but it’s damn near the same feeling.

Itadori’s knowing smirk is as annoying as it is stupidly kissable.

‘You seemed to enjoy that!’

‘It was decent. Much better than all the Saw movies combined.’

Itadori barks out a laugh. ‘Decent, he says. I saw you nearly crying through my own tears. And you were glued to the screen. Such a liar.’

Fushiguro relents. ‘Fine, it was really good. I’m hooked, and I cant wait to see the other 2 movies.’

‘You know I’ll be here.’

Fushiguro is helpless against his blush. He barely hides it in the crook of his elbow. Itadori’s fingers are still pressing into his feet and it’s all so much but not enough. His heart still aches.

‘And the next two movies are visual masterpieces. Can’t wait to get into it all!’

Fushiguro nods, and with the promise of next week, he sleeps just a little easier.

---

When Itadori pulls his feet into his lap three weeks in a row, Fushiguro decides it’s time he does more to repay the pink-haired man. It’s definitely not enough to just grace Itadori with his presence and with a weekly movie night.

So, when they come together to watch the third and final How to train your dragon movie, Fushiguro stands in his room, chewing his lower lip anxiously. He feels like he may have gone overboard, and he’s more scared of being found out by Itadori, about his feelings and his hopelessly ginormous crush and just how big of a complete and utter disaster he is than anything else.

Before he can take it down though, Itadori walks in after a quick knock and a shout of Pardon the intrusion but not reaaallllyyyy.

He walks in, snack bag in his mouth, arms holding way too much stuff, and gives Fushiguro a grin before turning to the bed to start his usual set-up routine. That’s when he stops dead on his feet, and Fushiguro at least enjoys the look of complete and utter shock on his face. The snack bag drops to the ground before Fushiguro can catch it with a loud thunk.

So, here’s a fun fact about Fushiguro- he can build insane blanket forts. No, really, you don’t understand, he could be mistaken for an architect because that’s how good he is. And the reason is a bit long and a bit complicated, but it mostly has to do with his sister. When they were left all alone in the world, sharing a small space just between the two of them, they would build blanket forts with all the stuff lying around the house, and within those sheets, they were shielded from the world and all its horrors. They did it for a long time, and it was their tradition. They got better at it over the years, learning what sheets worked best, what make-shift supports held things up at the right height, where to place the pillows.

The minute Fushiguro started to put the fort together, his muscle memory kicked in and took it from there. It brought forth some memories that made him choke up, but he focused on Itadori, and it helped. He adjusted the height to accommodate two growing boys instead of two tiny humans, and before he knew it, the fort had sprawled to encompass his entire room. He borrowed pillows from Inumaki and Panda, who were willing albeit slightly perplexed, and he grabbed Kugisaki’s fairy lights to really spruce things up. The weather had gotten colder, so he had also laid out his thick duvet for them to slip under, and the icing on the cake was the pizza he had ordered. Itadori always bought the snacks, so he wanted to pull his own weight. Also, they were active jujutsu sorcerers- they may have eaten dinner an hour ago, but they were always hungry. It was endless.

Itadori remains rooted in place, and Fushiguro starts to get nervous. A bit anxious. A bit scared. What if it is too much? Had he overstepped in some way? Or what if Itadori looked forward to building the fort and Fushiguro had taken that away from him?

Itadori slowly looks at him, eyes piercing and unreadable and bright.

And then he smiles. The world rights itself a little.

And he smiles big, huge, all-encompassing. Its lips stretched over white teeth and his eyes are crinkling in that really lovely way and the dimples are dotting his cheeks and its utter magic.

‘Fushi,’ Itadori gushes, almost breathless. ‘This is insane. How the hell did you do this?’

Fushiguro bites his lip. ‘You like it?’

‘Like? Fushi, dude, my man, my guy, like doesn’t begin to cover it! I don’t have better words cause I’m kind of an idiot, but it’s. Like. A+. 11/10. I’m so impressed right now.’

And now Fushiguro is smiling with him, stomach flopping around endlessly, and he’s young and in love and he doesn’t want to be anywhere else.

‘I also got pizza,’ Fushiguro gestures to the table behind him, picking the snack bag off the floor and placing it by the bed. ‘I wasn’t sure what you liked so I just got the same thing you ordered when I was sick.’

Itadori happily bounds over to the box and leans in for a sniff.

‘I love this stuff, it’s yum. And it’s still steaming, all fresh and hot.’ Itadori gives him a big thumbs-up. ‘This is so bomb Fushi, thank you so much!’

Fushiguro almost says No thank you, you’ve been doing so much for our movie nights and I wanted to show you how grateful I am for you and for all of this and I love you so please take my heart and just keep it, I really don’t need it, you know?

What he says instead is, ‘Not a problem. Shall we set up?’

And so, 10 minutes later finds them curled up in their usual spots, except this time they’re under the covers. Fushiguro places all the food between them, and Itadori alternates between massaging his feet (which he cleans meticulously before their movie nights because he doesn’t want Itadori to eat with dirty feet hands) and taking bites of pizza and smiling and laughing and choking up at the movie.

The trilogy ends and Fushiguro can honestly see why Itadori has watched this countless times. It’s just that good.

If Itadori hears him sniffle, he doesn’t say a word. Just squeezes his calf and runs his fingers from his knees to his ankles and Fushiguro realizes, in that moment, that a part of him will always belong to this man.

---

They don’t miss a single movie night for months. They’ve now finished the Saw franchise, the HTTYD trilogy, the Batman trilogy, and the entire Annabelle series. If Fushiguro didn’t hate dolls before, well, now the thought of them sends shivers up his spine. And he fights curses. For a living.

Life is weird.

They don’t miss a single movie night for months. Sometimes it’s Sunday night instead, or Friday. Sometimes it’s earlier in the day, in the afternoon maybe. Sometimes, it’s really late at night, so late that by the time they’re done, it’s already 3am and the world is silent. The world doesn’t exist beyond the walls of Fushiguro’s room, and he’s ok with that.

On those nights, Itadori stays over.

They curl up on his bed together, not quite touching but not quite not touching. It’s a single bed and they’re not small by any means. The touching is inevitable. Fushiguro wonders if any part of it is voluntary.

He learns that Itadori’s toes are always warm, unlike Fushiguro’s. He’s a surprisingly calm sleeper. His sleep-heavy voice is deep, and his sleep-heavy smile is soft.

They fall asleep facing away from one another, they wake up spooning or being spooned. They don’t say a word. And they don’t stop.

The night that they finish the latest Annabelle movie, Itadori looks insanely freaked out and Fushiguro doesn’t blame him. That shit’s creepy as hell.

The problem is that it’s only 00:14. Too early for them to call for a sleepover unprompted.

Itadori’s got Fushiguro’s legs in his lap, and he’s pursing his lips as if deep in thought. Fushiguro thinks fuck it.

‘Do you want to stay over?’

The relief flows off Itadori in waves. ‘You’re an actual lifesaver, you know that right?’

Fushiguro smirks, and they throw snarky comments back and forth between them as they get ready for bed. Itadori brings his toothbrush and they clean up side by side, fighting for the mirror. They take the fort down methodically, like a well-oiled machine, and they curl up under the duvet, touching but not quite touching, facing away from one another.

15 minutes later, Fushiguro feels Itadori curled around him, legs tangled and arm carefully slipped over his middle. He feels him shake, and he can taste the hesitation and he knows Itadori will move away soon because they both know they’re both awake.

He moves his hand lower and places it over Itadori’s. He squeezes it once, and moves it away, and evens out his breathing. He feels himself drifting off, and the last thing he feels is Itadori’s arm curling around him just a little tighter, holding him just a little closer. The air tastes less hesitant, more hopeful.

It’s wonderfully frightening.

---

They don’t miss a single movie night for months. Until one day, they do.

The thing about Sukuna is that he’s the King of Curses, Lord Asshat extraordinaire, and an overall terrible being. Not only does he reside in Itadori rent-free, he also chooses when to heal him and when to watch from the sidelines as blood gushes out of wounds that are near-fatal. Itadori’s pain tolerance is impossibly high, but that doesn’t mean he can’t feel pain.

Itadori feels everything. He feels so much, so willingly, so wholeheartedly. He’s a feeler.

And so, when one of their missions go haywire (as always), Itadori risks his life for his classmates (as always), and is left on the verge of death (as always). The only difference being he doesn’t improve. At least not at that inhumane pace that he always does.

He’s not dead, but he’s not in the world of the living either. He’s drifting somewhere in between, and Fushiguro feels like he’s drowning. He can’t get enough air; he can’t see beyond the murky waters that are darker than ink.

Fushiguro is in the in-house hospital on campus and he rarely, if ever, leaves Itadori’s side. The incident took place on a Tuesday and it is now Saturday. Itadori’s vitals are stable, his heart is in his chest, beating, and his blood is circulating and oxygenating him.

He does not wake up, he does not speak, and he does not smile.

Something in Fushiguro’s chest cracks.

People come by to visit all the time. Nobara brings snacks and chats with Itadori like he’s ok, like he’ll respond. Only Fushiguro hears the tremor in her voice. Maki holds back from smacking someone in a coma, vowing to get him good when he’s awake for doing something so monumentally dumb. Gojo flits in and out as often as he can, and he always squeezes Fushiguro’s shoulder with a tightness that eases his chest just a little before leaving again.

After dinner on Saturday, Fushiguro decides to do something.

He lets himself into Itadori’s room- messy but not sloppy, and simple. He finds his laptop on his desk and charges it for a bit before taking it back with him. He doesn’t set up a blanket fort, simple loads up a Christopher Nolan movie that they’d decided on last week and lets it play.

He holds Itadori’s hand the entire time. It doesn’t squeeze back.

The crack in his chest widens.

---

He’s not there when Itadori wakes up.

Gojo had pushed him out of the room to go take a shower and grab a proper meal and maybe even take a nap, and Fushiguro had relented to two of the three- showering and eating. With a belly full of terrible convenience store food that could never hope to hold a candle to Itadori’s meals, Fushiguro slowly makes his way back to the infirmary when he hears voices. One voice, in particular, stops him in his tracks.

‘How are you feeling?’

‘My mouth tastes like ass.’

It’s one of the first things Itadori has said in a week and a half, and something between a laugh and a sob gets stuck in Fushiguro’s chest. He moves to yank the door open and throw himself at Itadori when he hears-

‘Where’s Fushi?’

‘Oh, he went to take a shower, clean up a little, all that.’

‘Ah. I see.’

Fuck, he sounds disappointed.

‘Don’t look so upset.’ Gojo teases. ‘He hasn’t left your side since you got hurt, you know?’

‘Really?’

Gojo hums. ‘He’s here all day. He tried working for a day or two, but his head wasn’t in it, so we forced him to sit out for a bit. He’s just been keeping you company here, reading, fretting, pining.’

Fushiguro wants to punch Gojo.

Itadori barks out a laugh. It sounds loud and forced and not very happy.

‘Don’t tease me about that sensei. That’s cruel, even for you.’

‘What are you talking about?’

‘You know what I’m talking about.’

‘I want to be sure. I’m not a mind-reader you know. So tell me,’ Gojo urges, ‘what are you talking about?’

Itadori sighs. It sounds exhausted more than pained. ‘I’ve liked him since the day we fought the curse and saved my senpais. It’s cruel for you to tease me about a one-sided crush.’

Fushiguro is suddenly numb, hot and cold everywhere, and his head is spinning, an echo of ‘I’ve liked him I’ve liked him’ just bouncing around his brain endlessly. He has to force himself to concentrate or risk missing out more of the conversation.

‘I mean, why do you think it’s one-sided?’

‘Are you kidding me? He’s so out of my league, I can’t even think about it. He’s so. Just. Everything good in this world. And he likes dogs sensei, what more could I want in a person?’

Fushiguro’s vision is just swimming and he wants to smother Itadori in a hug and protect him forever. His feet are taking longer to respond to his brain though.

‘I don’t think that’s true,’ Gojo sings, laughing. ‘My advice would be to not give up. You’d be good for each other, you know? Also, he’s really not all that perfect. Trust me, I’ve known him since he was a child. This one time, during the spring festival, he-‘

‘Itadori, you’re awake?’

Evidently, his self-preservation instincts had bypassed his brain and forced his legs to move at near inhumane speed. God bless instincts.

Itadori is sitting up, and he looks a bit frail but the color in his cheeks is steadily returning. His eyes widen in surprise before his mouth twists up in a grin so wide Fushiguro is worried he’ll break his face. His eyes are molten, watery, and brighter than the sun.

‘Hi Fushi.’

For once, Fushiguro doesn’t give a two shit flying fuck that Gojo is in the room and will hence tease him for the rest of his life, he just walks over to the bed and gathers Itadori into a hug and holds him there, pressing his warmth into Itadori. There’s the beating of his heart, the rise and fall of his chest, and the smile on his lips pressed into Fushiguro’s shoulder.

The world rights itself on its axis, just a little more.

‘Idiot.’

Itadori’s muffled laugh makes him grin, and he pulls away. He rearranges his face in a scowl.

‘I told you before if you die on me-‘

‘-you’ll kill me yourself. I know, I know. I’m here Fushi, you don’t have to become a murderer. It’s a good day.’

Fushiguro lets his face morph back into a grin before looking over at Gojo. His teacher’s smirk tells him everything- how he knew where Fushiguro was, how he’s seen right through Fushiguro, how he’s going to tease him till the day either of them die. And Fushiguro wants to be annoyed and pissed off but he can’t bring himself to care, not right now.

Itadori’s heart is beating in his chest, and he smiles at Fushiguro, and his cheeks are tinting pink.

Fushiguro’s heart is full.

---

‘Sorry I missed movie night.’

Itadori’s apology is so stupid Fushiguro nearly gwaffs, but that’s undignified as fuck so he settles for a cough and a withering stare.

‘I mean, it’s not like you were in a coma or anything.’

‘You know what I mean! But anyway, I’m here now, so let’s pick up where we left off.’

‘No, we’ll have to move on to the next movie. We watched that one last week.’

‘Huh?’

Fushiguro looks at him, prays he isn’t seven shades of red. ‘Well, I thought maybe if we had a movie night at the infirmary, you’d feel better. Where you were. Especially if you were dealing with lord fuckwad. You know?’

Itadori stares at him in awe and chuckles softly. ‘You’re something else, you know? Just when I think I’ve got you all figured out.’

Gojo’s word reverberate around his skull and Fushiguro just clears his throat. ‘Yeah, well, I’m all about surprising people. Woohoo.’

Itadori bursts out laughing, and they go back to setting up the fort, the pizza, the snacks, the lights, the laptop. It’s easy and familiar and nice. They settle into the mattress, but Fushiguro doesn’t let Itadori take his feet this time, opting to press into his side instead. Itadori barely puts up a fight.

They’re roughly 8 minutes into Interstellar when Itadori asks, ‘How did you set up the movie in the infirmary?’

Fushiguro hums, ‘I grabbed your laptop and put it on a chair to your left. I sat on the right. I sat by your bed and I…’

‘And you?’

Fushiguro should be nervous but he’s not. He’s surprised by how not nervous he is.

‘And I did this.’ He laces their hands together, eyes trained on Itadori's.

It’s like looking at a bowl of liquid amber. His eyes are light brown, bordering on gold, and they’re mesmerizing when you’re this close. He doesn’t look away from Fushiguro, his breath doesn’t stutter, he doesn’t jerk away. He squeezes Fushiguro’s hand with his right one and slowly brings up the left. He rests it on Fushiguro’s jaw, soft skin meeting calloused fingers and there’s a heat building under Fushiguro’s skin that makes him feel that same hot and cold sensation everywhere.

‘I’m going to kiss you.’

Itadori’s voice is deeper than Fushiguro’s ever heard it, low and spicy and sure. His hands are gentle and confident.

Fushiguro doesn’t nod or say Yes or blush.

He just brings his right arm up, wraps it around Itadori’s left wrist and leans in, bringing them together in what is possibly the softest touch of lips ever, in the history of the universe.

It’s not hesitant, it’s just new. And all-encompassing. And maddeningly good. And soft.

Itadori’s breath hitches and he leans his head, slotting their lips together better and Fushiguro is humming because fucking hell is this good. There’s no tongue, just pressure and nips and small licks and bites. By the end of it, Fushiguro is smiling into Itadori’s smile, and he’s kissing it and nuzzling it and he’s drowning in the best way possible.

Itadori finally pulls away, after several small kisses, and does that beaming smile that makes Fushiguro’s stomach do really terrible things.

‘I can’t believe all this happened because of Saw.’

Fushiguro’s smile shrivels away in a heartbeat and Itadori is laughing and snorting, the bastard.

‘Itadori Yuji.’

More laughter.

‘I swear on all that is good and pure, if you tell people we got together because of Saw, I will dump your ass so hard you won't be able to sit down for weeks.’

Itadori laughs some more and presses his giggles against Fushiguro’s lips and dammit he’s so weak and gay.

Itadori’s hand slips down his jaw and cups the back of his neck and he pulls him close, pressing their foreheads together.

‘We both know that’s not true.’

Damn it. He really does know Fushiguro like the back of his hand.

And so he does the only thing he can think of- he kisses him again. And again. And then some more, just because he can.

The movie remains forgotten, and frankly, they couldn’t care less.

#jujutsu kaisen #itadori yuuji #fushiguro megumi #itafushi #itadori x fushiguro #jjk fic #fluff #so much fluff #and movie nights #pining #this is just fushiguro pining #itadori is a good friend #the goodest #jjk #hi hello i hope you all like this #and i hope everyone's doing ok and staying safe!!#much love to you all

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capricornwriter5 · 2 years

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You are the one - Chapter 5

Pairing: Bang Chan x female OC; Lee Know x female OC

Genre: au (high shool, college), love triangle, fluff, angst, smut, from friends to lovers. Warning: soft drugs

Words: 4k

Summary: Bang Chan and Jasmine have been best friends for as long as they can remember. With little time to finish high school, they both begin to develop romantic feelings. However, family situations and communication issues force them to move away. Once in college, they decide to try to regain the friendship they had. As Bang Chan sees the opportunity to finally be with the girl he has always loved, his friend Lee Know, who had been studying in England, returns home and the connection he develops with Jasmine is undeniable. Can the chemistry and attraction with Lee Know outweigh a tender first love and memories of years of friendship between Bang Chan and Jasmine?

Disclaimer: I named the character Jasmine (Minnie for Chan 🥰) because I love that name. Besides, it’s easier if we want to see Chan saying cute names (it’s better than just Y/N, I think) but you can totally picture yourselves in the story, that’s the idea. <3

Chapter 5 - Christmas Together

By the beginning of September, Chan and Jaz had been together for a month. Their friends still did not suspect that something was happening, they always saw them studying or working on everything they had to do; therefore, they had not had much time to notice any change in them.

For his part, Han was dying from excitement, his birthday was coming up and he and Changbin had planned a party with friends that Jasmine didn't know. Being people from several different schools, Changbin swore that that event would be legendary.

"Legendary like when you drowned in a pool where you touched the ground without any problem? Or legendary like when your blood pressure was so low after smoking at Chris's house that we needed to help you regain consciousness?" Jasmine teased him when it was the tenth time that day that Changbin talked about how amazing the party would be.

"Very funny, Jaz. And for the record, it'll be even better than that." He answered pouting his lips.

"Oh, I get it. You mean legendary like when you cried because you thought Han was lost and you had him behind?"

"I was worried, the place was too big!"

"Bin, it was the garden of my house," Jasmine said laughing a lot, and seeing him so offended, she hugged him tenderly.

Han had opened his mouth to continue teasing Changbin, but he noticed Chan's gaze and his hand sneaking his girl closer to him.

"What do you want for your birthday, Hannie?"

"I want a cake like the one you made for Chan for his birthday."

"No!" Chan used such a tone that the three of them looked at him strangely. "I mean... a cake might not be enough, we could give you something els ..." The boy didn't even realize that he was talking as if they were a couple and they were going to give him a present together, but before his friends could even say anything, Jasmine's killer gaze scared the three guys.

"Are you saying my cake is not good enough?"

"No, no, no! I didn't mean that!"

"Ok, we need to go, we'll see you at the party tomorrow." Han took Changbin by the arm and ran away as fast as possible.

Once alone, Jaz looked at Chan and crossed her arms. "So, what I gave you wasn't enough?"

"No, Minnie! I mean, yeah, of course it was enough, that's not what I was trying to say," He said highly anguished. "I just thought that a homemade cake would not be a good idea for such a big birthday and that we could look for something else."

"You are listening to what you are saying, right?"

"Minnie..."

"Keep working, you're behind on the things you need to do, and if you don't hand in your chemistry paper, we're going to have to make up even more points."

Jasmine focused on the research she had to hand in with Chan; however, the boy did everything to get her attention. There came a point when, in the most uncomfortable way, Chan poked his head out from under Jasmine's arms, who looked at him and couldn't help laughing.

"Are you still mad at me?"

"Yes, you were mean." She replied trying not to look at him but Chan was getting closer and closer and Jasmine was already beginning to worry about his back, the position was really uncomfortable.

"But I love everything you do for me, especially when you cook."Chan continued asking for attention all afternoon until a moment in which Jasmine did not care anymore being in the library and stole him a kiss, which convinced him to focus on his work.

The night before Han's birthday, Jasmine and Chan were at the boy's house baking the cake. Fortunately, Chan's parents were not there, so there was a calm air in the house. The young couple had worked so hard during all the week, that Jasmine asked Chan to take the weekend just for them. As a response, Chan was like in a dream, his girl would not stop hugging and kissing him. In fact, Han's cake almost got burned for not hearing the alarm, and it was impossible to blame them, they were passionately kissing their first love in the living room.

When Jasmine saw the cake, she made a whole scene saying that the looked was horrible; however, Chan was used to how perfectionist the girl was.

"Minnie, the cake's perfect, Han is going to love it. Let it cool down a bit." He suggested taking her by the hand for her to pay attention to him. "Minnie, let's go upstairs, let's go see a movie or play something. Come on, come on."

"Chris, wait!" She said pushing him, as he kept taking her by the waist and trying to take her away. "I still have to bake one for Changbin or he's not going to forgive me. Didn't you hear him complaining for hours because I didn't make him one for his birthday?"

"No, nothing for Changbin, it's too long before his birthday and it was his fault for asking for such a stupid gift as green dumbbells."

"I won't last at all, I promise you." She said winking at him but Chan didn't listen to her anymore and taking her carefully, he lifted her up.

Jasmine tried many times to tell him to lower her, she even moved trying to make him lose the balance, but for Chan, lifting Jasmine was the easiest thing in the world, it did not require any effort.

"We're going to stay upstairs and we're definitely not going to prepare anything else for anyone."

"Oh my God! I have known you for all my life and I had no idea how jealous you could be. Chris, we're always together! It's just a cake."

"That's totally false! We're always doing things, but you never have time for me."

"You're the most spoilt person on Earth!"

Chan smiled and pretended not to hear her until they had finally reached his room. The boy dropped into a huge chair with Jasmine sitting on his lap. In a matter of seconds the kisses had taken over the couple, and although they were taking things very slowly, that did not mean that they did not enjoy the closeness and the physical contact very much. With the little time they had been together, they were already realizing what the kisses, caresses, and warmth of the other's body awoke in them.

Chan smirked when he saw Jasmine braiding her hair and immediately started to spread kisses down her neck. He was going slowly because he wanted her to feel comfortable with him, but the mischievous laugh that Jasmine let him hear when he touched her neck with his lips, made him understand that she felt comfortable. Soon, the kiss deepened and Jasmine held onto Chan's shoulders as he left an evident mark behind her ear.

"Did you just..." Jasmine didn't finish asking when she got up and went to the bathroom, she saw what Chan had done.

Before saying anything else, Chan showed smirked so seductively that Jasmine could do anything else but let herself be carried away again by her best friend, who this time laid her on his bed and little by little, he settled on top of her.

"You're not upset, are you?" He smiled again, but this time tenderly while he moved a lock of Jaz's hair.

"No, I just thought it's not fair that your neck is so intact."

"Minnie, you can do whatever you want with it. You can do whatever you feel comfortable with."

At that moment, Chan let the girl lead the situation, and she had soon laid him under her body. Having Bang Chan at his entire disposal was something that she still did not think was possible, seeing how his gaze did not leave hers, just to fix on her lips, was something that excited Jasmine. However, that night, when she was the one who found Chan's neck and heard his laughter mingle with a husky sound, Jasmine could get an idea of how sexy her best friend was from being turned on.

Soon, Bang Chan had several small marks down his neck, he was having more self-control than ever in his life. But feeling Jasmine's body on his, her hips moving against his, and her lips and tongue on his neck was becoming quite a challenge for him.

Unfortunately, they were forced to stop, as the boy's parents arrived unannounced and insisted on having dinner together. They rarely spent time with Bang Chan, and Jasmine was the first to tell him to accept to spend time with them. That night was really an exception, no one argued and they were able to talk nicely.

*****

The night of the party, Jasmine walked in with Bang Chan and almost immediately they ran into Han, who took the girl by the arm to introduce her to other friends. They all turned out to be quite nice, but the one Jasmine got along the best with was Hyunjin. Ever since he saw her, he kept telling her how much he liked her outfit. And not only that, in a moment when Changbin appeared saying the lamest joke ever, Hyunjin looked at him with such repugnance and embarrassment, that Jasmine just couldn't stop laughing.

"All the drinks at this party are cheap and tasteless, and do you know why? Because Han let Changbin buy them. I don't drink, but if I drink, it has to be something that tastes good, come with me."

Bang Chan was talking to another group of friends and laughed as Hyunjin took Jasmine to the kitchen. Chan already knew him, and he was sure Hyunjin had taken Jasmine to complain about how stupid some of Han's friends were and the terrible decisions Changbin made every day.

"Try it, darling. I'm sure you have good taste and you're going to like it." He said pouring her a liquor that Jasmine had never seen, but just tasting it, she loved it.

After sitting down on some chairs in the kitchen, Jasmine recognized Changbin's backpack and smirked when she saw that he was carrying a whole box of brownies. "Can you imagine how furious he would get if they got lost?" The boy asked following Jaz's gaze.

"I can imagine it, yes, but I'd rather see it." She said smiling maliciously, to which Hyunjin opened his mouth.

"I can officially say that I love you. We could also make Han's birthday funnier, do you see what he's playing with his friends?"

Jasmine nodded and saw several boys, including Bang Chan, playing with their cell phones and laughing a lot.

"If I call Han, the game is going to stop and they'll have to start over."

Thus, the girl hid the box of Changbin's brownies in her bag, she knew that he would never dare to check it. Afterward, they called Han together and as soon as they heard the screams, they knew their prank had been a success.

"Oh, here comes daddy."

Jasmine didn't need to turn around when she heard Bang Chan's voice. "I've told you a thousand times to stop calling me that, it's sick."

"Chris, there you are!" She hugged him and just by doing that, Chan knew she had drunk a lot. His girl was laughing more than normal, her cheeks were pink, and Hyunjin was exactly the same. If those weren't enough clues, Chan saw the bottle totally empty.

"Hello, beautiful." He said hugging her back and re-adjusting a strap from her dress that had slipped. "How long have you been here drinking? Hyunjin, what happened to your shirt?"

When Hyunjin saw his designer shirt stained by alcohol, he made such a dramatic scene, that he even dropped into the table crying, lamenting, and saying how much what had happened had hurt him. Bang Chan and Jasmine were shocked to see such a scene and before they could say anything else, Hyunjin had left the kitchen.

"Let's ignore what just happened. How do you feel?"

"I feel just great!"

"Oh yeah? It seems to me that someone is slightly drunk." Jasmine pulled away from him to say no, but she stumbled and Chan took her carefully while still laughing. Once he sat her back down to where she had been with Hyunjin, he gave her one of those loving looks that no one could deny. "You were telling me...?"

"That you look very handsome today. Why does Hyunjin call you daddy? Should I call you like that too?" Chan's laugh was heard throughout the kitchen with that last question.

"Well, I don't know why he tells me like that, and if you want to... I'm not going to say no." He said raising his eyebrows and approaching what was missing, he kissed her cheek. "I think it could be very hot."

Jasmine took him by the shirt and pulled him closer, she gave him a kiss that would have been longer if not for Chan stopped her to look into her eyes. "Wait, first I have to know if you're sure what you're doing, Minnie."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm saying that you were drinking, you're kissing me and there are a lot of people outside. You didn't want people to talk, baby. I mean, there's no problem for me if they know we're dating, but I don't want you to feel uncomfortable at school."

"Ok, firstly, I really, really like you, and I love to kiss you, I don't care if there are people here or outside, Chris. Second, I can only feel amazing with you. And, finally, I'm not drunk, I'm totally sober. Maybe just a little dizzy."

"Minnie, you're trying to pour yourself some water on a plate, let me help you."

"Everything is under control."

Chan tried to bring her a glass, but as he did so, Jasmine hugged him again and brought her lips to his again, this time getting much closer than before. In response, the boy took her by the legs and lifting her, sat Jaz on the table next to them. While Chan's hands were touching the soft skin of Jasmine's legs, someone had opened the door and screamed so loudly, that the couple jumped.

Turning around, they saw Changbin and Han with wide eyes. They couldn't even say a word when their two friends were already joking, pushing, and lashing out with questions of when they had started.

"I can't believe you didn't tell me anything! I mean, I should be best man at your wedding!"

"Bin, you cannot be our godfather because you would get stoned during the ceremony."

"Hey! I'm perfectly capable of knowing when to get high and when not to!"

"I don't give a fuck about Changbin or his claims. I want to know why you didn't tell us and why I have to be surprised at my house with the two of you almost fucking in my kitchen. I'm going to have to burn my eyes after seeing this!"

"Han, don't be so extra, you didn't see anything. Trust me."

"Minnie..." Chan said with red ears and clearing his throat.

"So, Jaz, can we finally know how daddy is like a boyfriend?"

Chan was sick to death of be called like that, and hearing from Changbin's mouth was even more creepy than anything. "Ok... I'm going to go get something to drink and I'll be back when you're done with this topic".

"He's the best!" Jasmine replied hugging him from behind so he wouldn't leave and making Han and Changbin laugh, normally, the girl played along with her friends when it came to teasing Chan. "Don't go, daddy." She said into his ear and making him turn around immediately.

"Minnie, I'd rather you call me like that when we're alone." He replied barely audible.

"Look, Mom and Dad are saying dirty things to each other. You want to hear?" Changbin asked in such a disturbing way that it caused Han to spit the beer on his shirt. "You have to be kidding me! Back on my shirt? Shit, Han! Have a little self-control!"

Between the dirty shirt and not finding his brownies, Changbin ended up getting upset with everyone. His bad mood would have continued throughout the night had it not been for the fact that he disappeared for a while with one of his friends.

The party ended quite late and with almost all the guests drunk. Bang Chan laughed like never seeing the dynamic between Jasmine and Hyunjin, they were extremely dramatic, especially when Changbin joined them. Han's party was definitely one of their best nights.

*****

It was not even the first week of November when Jasmine had inaugurated the Christmas season, Bang Chan knew it was her favorite time, especially since it was when her dad had vacation and he could spend more time with her. Every year they were in charge of decorating the house as a surprise for Jasmine's mother. The first thing Jasmine did that month was asking her father to go with her to buy presents; he was pleased to go; however, the man didn't expect that all the gifts were for Chan.

"Princess, don't you think this is too much?" He asked realizing it was impossible for them to carry one more bag.

"It's never enough; besides, you already know that this time is not the best for Chris, his parents are never at home. He says he doesn't like to celebrate, but have you seen how happy he gets when he celebrates with us? He loves to help us decorate, and he always has a gift for us even if he doesn't like it. So, I thought this year could be different."

"So you decided that this year you are going to be his elf and you are going to fill his house with gifts. Chan's lucky, anyone would kill for a girlfriend like you."

"Girlfriend?"

"You think I didn't know? I'm so glad you gave yourself a chance, princess, you deserved it. But let me tell you, I didn't love seeing you kiss him. I'm going to have to talk seriously with that boy so that he doesn't abuse his luck."

Jasmine didn't even know what to say, she was so ashamed to know that he had seen them together. The girl tried to change the topic, but her father kept talking. "You're very happy, right? I've never seen you smile more than during the last month and I know that the only person responsible for that smile is an Australian young man."

"Chris is amazing, dad. Everyone dreams of falling in love with their best friend, I can't believe I was lucky that he liked me too."

"How could he not love you? He has been in love with you since he was a child."

"Could you help me with the surprise I have for him? Han and Changbin will help me too, but I'm super sure that if we do it by ourselves, we'll screw things up."

"I'll be more than happy to help you, just tell me what you need."

"I need you to distract him on Saturday. If the boys ask him, he will say no because he has a lot to do, but if an invitation comes from you, Chris would never say no. Meanwhile, I'll be with the boys at his house getting everything ready."

That Saturday, Chan was with Jaz's father while Han and Changbin helped Jasmine decorate a huge Christmas tree. While the boys tried to lift the tree and untangle all the lights, Jasmine decorated the rest of the living room, but being such a huge house, it was not an easy task.

"I hope that after all this work that idiot of Bang Chan has the best Christmas of his life." Changbin said without being able to move. Han had had the clever idea of rolling his friend's body with the lights, that way they would not get tangled up anymore. In the end, everything got complicated, Changbin was dying of the heat and no one had any idea how to let him go.

The three of them worked a lot, the tree took hours and they all ended up with red arms, but in the end, it was worth it. The house has never looked better "While Chan's house is being tidied up, they gave me a Christmas cane." Han said with his arms crossed and shaking his head negatively.

"Shut up, it's time to go, he must be getting here soon and Jaz still has some things to do." Changbin said helping the girl to put a few presents under the tree.

They were both about to leave when Jasmine hugged them and they saw that she had two boxes in each of her hands. "A small early gift, but you can't open it yet."

Now, she only had to wait for Bang Chan to arrive and see the surprise.

For the first time in years, Chan would see his house decorated for Christmas. The last time he had seen gifts under a tree in his house he was seven years old. After that, his parents gave him enormous sums of money, the only presents he got were from Jasmine and her family. She really hoped that that year could be different and that Bang Chan could enjoy such a special holiday. She still wouldn't tell him, but she had talked to the boy's parents to convince them to spend Christmas Eve with him and have dinner with their son. However, that surprise would come later.

Chan had gone to see a game with Jasmine's father, he also went to eat and accompanied him to buy a gift for his wife. The boy had no idea what was waiting for him. He entered the house but his gaze was fixed on his cellphone, actually, he was sending a text to his girl. However, after throwing his keys, Jaz surprised him with a lovely hug. Like every time he was close to her, Chan felt the change in his heartbeat and hugged her just as tightly.

"Hello, beau..." Chan couldn't finish his greeting when he had already looked up and had seen the decoration in the living room.

It was so much to assimilate that he even though they weren't at this house. It really has been years since he had a Christmas tree at his house. When he noticed the gifs, Bang Chan showed a precious smile that let Jasmine know how moved he was. "Are they for me, Minnie, are they all for me?"

In response, the girl nodded her head. "I know it's only November, but you have spent many years without celebrating Christmas properly, so I thought it would be nice to change that since today."

"I can't believe you did all this for me. You even decorated with nutcrackers! "Chan looked that the tree, in addition to spheres, had small nutcrackers.

"You've always loved them, when you see them at my house you smile a lot."

Bang Chan had no idea that Jasmine paid so much attention to him, he had never told her how much he liked those wooden figures, but Chan could spend hours looking at the details of each one of them at his best friend's house. Of course Jasmine knew it, the girl knew him better than anyone and she knew that that was the first thing she would have to get to see him happy.

"I have to confess that the boys helped me a lot. Changbin and Han spent the whole day with me decorating the tree."

The couple sat on the stairs and Chan laughed non-stop listening to all the stories of what had happened while they decorated. But beyond the funny stories, Chan's mind was focused on how much he adored the girl in front of him.

"You have to promise me that you won't open any present before Christmas."

"Minnie! That'll be impossible. The tree is full of things you chose for me. How can you ask me to ignore it?"

"Chris, seriously! You just have to wait a bit. Also, what makes you think that's all I have for you? Those are for Christmas, but I have more surprises for you."

Chan did not lose his smile for a second and taking her hands, he confessed something that he had been thinking for a long time. "Do you know something? I always thought that you'd be the best girlfriend of all, even if I didn't want to accept it, I was dying of jealousy thinking that you could be someone else's girlfriend. But I was very wrong. You're not just the best girlfriend, Minnie, you are the most wonderful person of all." Chan caressed her cheek, he found it adorable when she got shy, just like at that moment. "Minnie, this time by your side I have been happier than in all my life and the only thing I can think is that I want to make you as happy as you make me. If I can make you love me the way I love you, I won't need anything else."

"Chris, I already love you like that." She whispered closing her eyes, as Chan had reached out to kiss her forehead and then her lips.

To be continued… 🐺

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#stray kids #stray kids fanfic #stray kids imagines #stray kids bang chan #chan stray kids #skz #bang chan scenarios #skz chan #bang chan #bang chan fanfic #changbin #han jisung #hyunjin

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unmaskedagain · 4 years

Text

Spider Vs Bird

I worked a long time on this fic. I really liked working on it though and I hope you enjoy it

Peter met Marinette when they were six-years-old. She had been sent to camp in New York. She had been scared to be so far away from home, and while fluent in English spoke with a heavy accent that made other kids look at her funny.

Peter had never been away from his parents for more than a few days, ever. He wasn’t happy. He was miserable in fact. Peter had been sitting alone behind a tree, having escaped canoeing, face hid in his knees. His wanted nothing more than to go home. He sniffled.

“Don’t cry,” A soft voice said next to him. He looked up and saw a pretty bluenette with big blue eyes and a kind smile on her face looking at him. She looked about his age. “It’s okay. Do you miss home too?”

Peter nodded, and tried to make it look like he was crying. The other boys could be really, really mean. “I want my pops and dad.”

“I miss my mama and papa too,” Marinette said. “I’m really far away from them.”

“Where are you from?” Peter ask curiously. He hadn’t met many people from different countries before and never a kid his own age.

Marinette played with her hair, “France. Where are you from?”

“New York City,” Peter smiled. “It’s far but not as far as Paris. Do you miss it?”

“Yep; a whole a lot,” Marinette opened the care package from her Mommy and Daddy. It just made her miss them so much more. Her grandma Gina went to this camp when she was small, and so did her dad, so they sent her there too. “Chocolate, Vanilla, or Strawberry.”

And just like any kid, Peter didn’t ask why she was asking. “I like vanilla.”

“Are you allergic to anything?”

“No.”

Marinette nodded and pulled out two cupcakes from her care package. It had been sent overnight. “Here you go, have one.” She handed him a big vanilla cupcake.

Peter’s eyes went wide and he gave her a toothy grin that showed he was missing one of his front tenth. “Thank!” He bite into it. “This is really good,” he said with his mouth full.

“My parents made them,” Marinette smiled then bit into her own chocolate cupcake. “They’re bakers!”

Peter blinked at her with wide-eyes, “That’s so cool! So they cake cookies and cake and like everything right? You must get to eat as much as you want. I wish my parents were bakers!”

Marinette just laughed. It was the start of a beautiful friendship.

Steve and Tony would get letters from his son all about the new friend he made. And get a picture of their little boy with his arm around a blue-haired.

“Her name is Marinette,” Steve read the letter. “She’s French. Her parents are the best bakers in the world who send her weekly goodie packages. They have the coolest job ever!”

Tony blinked, “We’re superheroes.”

When they picked up Peter a month later from camp, he was ran up to him holding Marinette’s hand, “Dad, Pops; this is Marinette! She’s the best. She really smart and funny and cool. She’s my best friend ever! And-”

Tony laughed, “Easy there, squirt. Take a breath. Hi Miss Marinette.”

Marinette blushed but grinned big, “Hi, Mr. Stark, sir. Peter’s really nice. Like really nice. He even stopped a big kid from killing a poor little spider. He was really brave!”

Peter grinned, “You’re really brave. You’re the one who pushed him when he pushed me the ground. You even made him apologize. It was awesome.” He told his parents. “Can I got to Marinette’s? Please. I want to see her bakery. Pretty please.”

“Paris is a long ways away bud,” Steve teased. “You didn’t even want to leave for camp remember.”

“Not without your Ameri-bear,” Tony added with a chuckle. “You’ve been sleeping with that old teddy bear ever.”

They stopped laughing when they saw Peter giving them a wide-eyed look, his mouth dropped opened, with his face a bright red. Before they knew it, Peter was shoving them towards the car, “Be right back, Mari.”

Peter glared, “Don’t blow this for me.”

Tony snorted, “Blow what? Do you even know what they means?”

“Yes,” Peter huffed indignantly, though it was a lie. “Marinette’s really, really nice. And smart. And funny. She doesn’t think I’m weird. Or too smart or anything. And she’s so pretty. Like really, really pretty.”

Steve cooed, “Aww, you have a crush on Marinette.”

“NO!” Peter shouted. His face back to a bright shade of red.

Tony smirked, “So I shouldn’t send out the wedding invitations then?”

They were there for every milestone of Peter’s life; the day he was born, the day he crawled, his first word, his first steps, his first lab explosion, his first missing tooth, and his first day of school. Now they were baring witness to the first time Peter visibly looked to be contemplating murder. Unfortunately, it was at them.

“Mari’s parents are really cool,” Peter stated. “Just be cool like them.” Then he ran back to Marinette.

“I’m Tony Stark,” Tony said incredulously.

“I’m Captain America!” Steve said at the same time.

Still, they ended up meeting the rest of the Dupain-Cheng family, and found them delightful.

It was from that summer on that the Avengers got used to seeing Peter and Marinette running around the tower together. Peter also got used to be teased for his supposed crush on his best friend. Natasha ended up taking Marinette under wing and training her in combat and the art of spying.

However, it was only two years later, when the Avengers responded to an intruder alert and found Marinette standing over a hogtied Nick Fury, with a fierce look on her face and Peter looking proud, that Tony said two magical words:

“I ship it.”

Damian Wayne met Marinette when they were ten-years-old. Damian had only been living with his father for five years but still had trouble acting like a normal kid. The life of a league of shadows member was hard to break from; especially if it’s ingrained from a young age. He had been chastised more than a few times for leaving off on his own, especially in a place like Gotham.

When Alfred informed them that an old friend and business associate was coming to visit with her granddaughter, a girl Damian’s age; it was to no one’s surprise when his father took him aside and made him promise to be polite.

The woman Gina had showed up in the beginning of summer. She arrived on a motorcycle that had been so loud they heard as soon as she pulled up to the house. Alfred had answered the door with a chuckle.

“Penny!” The woman exclaimed and jumped at him with a hug. She had short silver, nearly white, hair and dressed mostly black and had a studded black leather jacket on and boots. “Ugh, still as boring as ever, I see,” Gina said once she pulled back from the hug.

“Gina,” Alfred smiled. “You haven’t change a bit.”

Gina just laughed, and turned her attention to Bruce, “Brucie; I heard you took my advice to go exploring the world. How’d you like it?”

Bruce smirked, “It was… educational.” He had known Gina since he was a boy, having spent a few summers with Tom, even gone to his and Sabine’s wedding. The woman hadn’t been to visit since Bruce adopted Tim and Cass. “You remember my boys?”

“Dick,” Gina said pulling the oldest Wayne boy into a tight hug. “You get more handsome every time I see. So sorry to hear you and Barbs broke up. I know some amazing girls I can introduce you to.”

Dick just laughed, “I’m fine flying solo for now.”

“Jason,” Gina said crossing her arms, with a raised eyebrow. “I haven’t seen you since I let you steal my last motorcycle.”

Jason smirked, “let me?” The only reason he’d happily come to the Manor was because Alfred told him Gina was on her way. She was the coolest lady he knew growing up.

“Oh please,” Gina waved him off. “You drove it to the Barnes and Nobel’s on 4th, and it sat there for like three hours. I have a tracker on my stuff, kid. I let you. Now give me a hug.” Jason laughed and hugged her.

The same went for Tim and Cass. Cass excitedly told Gina in Chinese all about her adventures in Hong Kong. Tim told her about his trip around the world. Then finally it was Damian’s turn.

Gina smiled softly at the youngest of Bruce’s kids, “And who’s this?”

Bruce put a hand on his son’s shoulder, “This is Damian.”

“Nice to meet you, Damian,” Gina said.

Damian nodded stiffly, “Pleasure.” He wore a black tailored dress pants and a high collard green turtle neck.

Gina rolled her eyes, “God, Bruce, he’s nearly as uptight as you were at his age.”

“I was not uptight,” Bruce defended, despite knowing he was bratty little shit when he was Damian’s age.

Alfred snorted but smiled, “And the young guest you brought with you.”

Gina grinned and held out her hand to her granddaughter who had stayed close to the motorcycle, “She’s a bit a shy.” She told them. “This is Marinette.”

“Hi!” Marinette waved shyly, blushing a bit.

The family cooed at the sight of the little blue-eyed, bluenette, in a baby blue shirt with a yellow happy face and dark jean short, with her hair in pigtails and big smile on her face. So innocent, so sweet. Bruce, of course, had been acquainted with Marinette. He had gone to the baby shower for her and stopped by the bakery whenever he was in Paris. The girl was the sweetest little thing.

When Damian and Marinette got sent off to play together, only Alfred, Gina, and Bruce thought it was a good idea. Damian didn’t know why he was being punished. And certainly there were more fitting punishment than spending time with some little kid.

He sent a cold glare at the bluenette, once they arrived in the entertainment room, “There are video games and movies over there,” Damian pointed to the TV. “Amuse yourself. Or perhaps you would prefer a coloring book and a teddy bear,” He said sarcastically.

Marinette crossed her arms, “First of all, I would love a coloring book, thank you very much. There’s nothing wrong with that.” He snorted. “And Bruce said we should play together; get to know each other. Or do you frequently disobey an order?” If Damian was a rebel, Marinette needed to know. Because there was a fine line between rebel and troublemaker.

Damian huffed, “Fine; let’s play a game then. How about… Mortal Kombat.” He sent her a cruel smirk. “Not the video game. Real life. It’s simple. We fight and the first person to die or cry,” He said with distaste. “Loses. Up for it?”

“What weapons do we get?” Marinette asked. Bucky and Natasha had taught her for the last four years on a variety of weapons. Though she knew it was only because of Steve’s doing that they hadn’t taught her how to use a gun yet. They even got a shield agent assigned to Paris to train her throughout the school year.

Damian raised an eyebrow, curious. He had expected her to run screaming from the room in sheer terror, crying to her grandmother. “What do you prefer?”

“Bo staff.”

“Same,” Damian said. “Let’s take this to the backyard.”

When Marinette yelled to her grandma that she and Damian were going to play in the backyard, Damian marveled that no one came out with questions filled with suspicious. Granted the first time Damian said he was going to go play in the backyard, he ended up in Watch Tower going over surveillance footage.

Marinette and Damian stood ten feet apart on the grassy field, each held a long black bo staff. It was quiet. Damian had set an alarm on his phone to begin the fight. Marinette set hers to play music.

When the loud beeping sounded and Carrie Underwood’s champion started playing, they charged at each other.

It was a mix of attacks and dodges. Their staffs met; each putting their full force behind it.

“It is not wise to meet a Wayne in Battle,” Damian growled at her.

Marinette rolled her eyes, “If all Waynes are as big of a jerk as you are, you must all be used to be called out to fight.”

Damian attacks. The two kids stand in one place, trading feints, thrusts and parries with lightning speed, almost impossible to follow. The youngest Wayne was reluctant to admit, even to himself, that Marinette had no trouble matching him. “You know what you're doing, I'll give you that.”

“Not too bad yourself,” Marinette nodded.

The two slow walked around the length of the imaginary circle. Until they were in the exact opposite of their initial positions.

“Your taste in music is terrible though,” Damian added on. Marinette let out an angry hiss like a cat and attacks,

Their duel continued. Their staff flash and ring. Suddenly, Damian swung his staff, partially letting go. Marinette seeing the staff free sailing, ducked quickly. Not seeing Damian catch it at the last second, and then send a kick flying at her chest. Her weapon flew out of her hand. Marinette crashes to the ground, and with a quick swing her legs, sweeps Damian’s feet from under him, losing his weapon in the process.

Marinette and Damian jumped up, right back in the fighting position. What happened next was a mix of punches and kicks, and headlocks. Until they found themselves once again across from each in their imaginary circle.

Marinette’s hair was a mess, pigtails having come lose. She was covered in welts and bruises from the staff. There was blood on her shirt and dripping her nose. Damian didn’t look any better. His well-groomed look was gone. His turtleneck had torn. His lip was busted. There was bruising around his neck from when Marinette had wrapped her legs around it and held him in a chokehold, like Natasha had taught her, until he managed to maneuver out of it.

Giggles burst from Marinette before she could stop them, “You look ridiculous,” She laughed.

“Shall I show you a mirror?” Damian said with a smirk. He chuckled.

They both shook their heads, looked at each other again, and they each fell over laughing. They only stopped when the sound of applause reached their ears.

Damian and Marinette looked up and saw the entire Wayne family and Gina watching them.

Alfred nodded approvingly, “I see she takes after you Gina.”

“That she does,” Gina grinned. “You’re grandson could give a young you a run for your money.”

“How long after you been there?” Marinette squeaked.

Bruce fought not to smile. “Just as the music started to play. We were going to invite you both in for ice cream.” He had been furious at first at his youngest child for deciding to spar with a civilian but the fury had faded as it became clear that Marinette could keep up with his son. There were times when he was sure one was trying to kill the other but they always held back; even if only just.

He looked at Gina, “It’s nice to see Damian getting along so well with someone.” He would regret those words soon enough. Very soon.

Damian and Marinette spent the next few days running after each other and trying to one up another in best surprise attacks. Bruce’s older kids took bets. Jason and Cass voted that Marinette would eventually win. Tim and Dick sided with Damian.

One day, after lunch, Damian commented on his field trip his class was taking, “The zoo,” he wrinkled his nose. “It’s barbaric. Animals trapped in cages while less human beings gawk in amusement. There’s a new wolf exhibit my teacher is dying to see. It’s all terrible.”

Marinette agreed. While she liked the zoo, she always thought the animals looked really sad. She took a sip from her juice box, “So let’s do something about it.”

That night, after midnight, the two kids climbed out of their windows, onto the roof, and quietly raced into the darkness. When they made it to the Zoo, they wasted no time in disabling the security cameras and breaking in the wolf exhibit. Damian, dressed in his the Robin costume he wasn’t supposed to have yet, managed to calm the wolf down as Marinette, dressed in mostly black with a red mask on, stole a truck (something she learned from Clint.) By the time security managed to get the cameras working again the kids and wolf were gone. All without a trace.

The kids, and wolf, ditched the truck about a mile from the manor and raced home. They snuck back in through the tunnels of the Batcave that let the batmobile move securely without anyone seeing it.

However, when they finally got to the Batcave, they were met with the exasperated looks of Batman and Alfred and the highly amused looks of Gina, Nightwing, Redhood, Blackbat, and Robin.

Damian nodded slowly, not even bothering to try to hide the giant wolf, “Father, I decided that Marinette should stay for summer. She is much more pleasant than I originally thought. And don’t worry, Marinette figured out you were batman her third day here. She even found the cave all on her own.”

Batman narrowed his eyes. He took of his cowl. He had been alerted that his son and Marinette were missing from their rooms just seconds after he was alerted about a break in at the zoo. He knew his son well. And it didn’t take a genius to be two and two together. “Grounded! One week.” He looked at Gina who nodded in agreement, though the smile was still on her face.

The kids huffed but nodded.

“And wolf is going back!” That was met with loud protests.

Marinette stayed at the Wayne Manor for another month. Not long after the grounding was over, Damian came into the living room where his father and siblings were and informed his father that he was leaving, “Alfred is taking Marinette and I to the movies. There is a showing of the new Little Mermaid movie she desires to see.”

Bruce closed the book he was reading, “Very well. I’ll tag along. We can make a family day out of it.” Dick was the first to agree followed shortly by the others, who wanted to see the havoc Marinette and Damian tended to create.

Damian visibly froze, “No, father.” He stated firmly. “I had… hoped it would be just Marinette and I. We can be trusted, I assure you.”

“It’s not a matter of trust,” Bruce started but Jason interrupted him.

“No! Way!” Jason yelled, his eyes wide with a sudden realization, and a grin his face. “You like her.”

It was the entire room’s turn to freeze. All eyes on Damian who had blush slowly creeping onto his face. “Marinette has proven herself to be a strong and intelligent ally. She is worthy of my regard.”

Jason shook his head, “No. You like her, like her.”

“I have come to value her friendship highly,” Damian said but the deepening redness of his face told a different story. He went to elementary school, he knew what like-like meant.

Dick cooed, “Baby bird has a crush.”

“I do not!” Damian hissed.

Cass snickered, “It is alright. Marinette is quite lovely.”

Tim smirked, “And she has rather nice green eyes. A bit dull though.”

“Blue!” Damian corrected quickly. “She has marvelous blue eyes. They are not dull. They shine brighter than the sun. They sparkle when she laughs, you dolt.”

Silence filled the room. Damian looked horrified at his words. Bruce looked at his young son with raise eyebrows and a small smile on his face.

“I am leaving now, father,” Damian stated. “I will return as soon as the movie ends provided we do not stop for frozen yogurt. Good day.” And then he swiftly left the room, leaving his siblings snickering in his wake.

Bruce opened back up his book, “I ship it.”

The declaration caused the room to fill with shouts.

Marinette would spend half of every summer for the next few years in Gotham; training with Damian under the guidance of Batman himself. Eventually going onto meet the rest of the Justice League. She and Damian used the zeta beams to hang out as much as possible.

The other half of her summers, Marinette spent in New York City at Stark Tower with Peter and the rest of the avengers. Learning under the tutelage of The Black Widow and The Winter Soldier, two out of four of Peter’s godparents (the others being Rhodey and Pepper of course), while Peter learned under his parents.

Damian officially became Robin at 12. Peter became Spider-man at fourteen. And Marinette became Ladybug at 13. It was to no one’s surprise the two boys were the first ones she told about being a superhero. And it was not to her surprise when they couldn’t keep it from their families for long.

“Aww, look you two match,” Tony said upon seeing Marinette transform. “Couples costumes.” The genius would later admit he had that mouth webbing coming. He still ship Peter/Marinette so hard.

Three weeks later, Bruce had said, “A little bright, isn’t it?”

“Do I even need to mention the first Robin costume?” Marinette snapped back. Though she was secretly glad that as soon as she saw the original Ladybug costume she had Tikki teach her out to change it. Gone was skintight onesie. Now she dressed in a more armored uniform. That was mostly black with bright red polka dots everywhere.

Bruce smirked. He was proud of the girl who had become his son’s closest friend, and obvious crush. He really hoped his son would ask out Marinette soon.

Then the Avengers and Justice League found out. Marinette found herself defending Paris with a league member or an Avenger for like six months before she finally told them where to shove it. She would call them if she needed them. Though she didn’t mind Robin or Spiderman dropping into help every now and then when their secret identities were in town.

Chat, who had grown become a brother to Marinette once their identities had been revealed to each other, had fanboy’d so hard the first time Robin came to help. And then again when Spiderman appeared, after catching Ladybug in a web after she’d been knocked from the top of the Eiffel tower. Then Marinette had to reveal that she knew the Avengers and the Justice league.

It took Adrien five seconds with Peter Stark-Rogers to know he had a crush on Marinette. And he cheerfully told Peter, “I’ve got the god of destruction in my pocket. I’ll feed you to him if you hurt her.”

It took Adrien three days to realize Damian Wayne liked Marinette. And he braced himself, held his ground, and told the teen, “You like Marinette. She’s my sister. I just want you to remember: Cats eat birds.”

He thought it was really menacing until Damian sprayed him the face with a water bottle, “Bad kitty.”

Adrien hissed.

As good as Marinette’s superhero life was going, so was her fashion career. MDC was slowly become well known high-class designer and household name thanks to Jagged Stone, Clara Nightingale, Bruce Wayne, Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, Natasha, and even Lex Luther wearing her clothes.

her normal life had gone in the opposite direction.

Lila had come to class and lied her way to the top; she went on and on about all the celebrities she knew. She promised all the students great chances and opportunities. Only a few didn’t eat it all up. Marinette, Chloe, Nathaniel, and Adrien called out her lies relentlessly. This caused the class to think of them as jealous bullies and had them ostracized to the back at Lila’s subtle behest. Unfortunately for Lila, Adrien had been quick to join them. And nothing she, or anyone else in class, could say to convince the blond boy otherwise.

Marinette had thought of most of the students as friends but hadn’t been too surprised when they turned against her. She had never been to close to any of apart from the ones who joined her in back. For a while she had considered that maybe Alya would become her best friend but decided against it once she learned just what type of journalist she was. The glasses-wearing girl was always out for the next big scoop and didn’t seem to care how she got it; even if it meant putting herself in danger.

Alya had also been adamant for a long time that Ladybug and Chat Noir liked each other romantically despite both heroes denying it repeatedly. She only stopped when Chat Noir told Alya that Ladybug was his sister.

When Lila came, like the rest of the class, Alya ate up her stories and promises of a future at famous newspapers like the Daily Planet or the Gotham Gazette.

And when Marinette claimed Lila was lying, Alya was the first to accuse Marinette of being jealous. The girl never seemed to get the message that Marinette and Adrien didn’t like each other that way and only thought of each as siblings at best and best friends at worst. Alya didn’t listen or care. Whenever Lila gave a tear-filled eyes saying that Marinette was being oh so mean to her, Alya was the first to defend her new bestie. The rest of the class following suit.

It didn’t take long for Marinette to be voted out of being class president. This made Fearsome four, as Nathanial had nicknamed them after he and Chloe were given permanent spots as heroes, snickered as Marinette had pulled several string to for the annual class trip; so much for the class staying at Stark Tower with the Avengers or visiting Gotham and staying in luxury hotels. Oh well.

Once she wasn’t class president, all the little things that Marinette had done in addition to the positon had stopped as well. She stopped planning dances, fundraisers, and birthday parties (mostly because she was never invited to go to anyone’s in classes anymore.) No more free sweets from the bakery for anyone but her three friends. No free commissions. No babysitting. No banner designs. Nothing. Squat. Zero.

This of course caused anger from the other students in class as they had gotten used to all the free Marinette provided and tasks she did.

Alya huffed, “You’re just getting back us because we’re not your friends anymore.”

To which Marinette replied coldly, “Your point being?”

It was suffice to say when Marinette fifteenth birthday rolled around and Marinette’s mom forced her to give invitations to the entire class, the students were quick to rip up the invitations in front of her face.

Lila smiled, “Sorry, Marinette. Everyone’s throwing a party for me that day. No one can come.”

“Thank god,” Marinette said to their shock because it was obvious the girl was sincerely relieved. “My mom forced me to invite you, and I had no idea how to politely tell you I didn’t really want you to come.”

On the day of Marinette’s birthday, Saturday, while the class was enjoying their own party, Marinette just finished setting up a mock carnival with rides, games, and concession booths, and an area for bands to play. Adrien had even gotten his dad, Nathalie, and Gorilla to come on the threat of shaving his head bald.

Then Marinette’s guests started to arrive. Marinette’s schoolmates, the ones she had started to befriend after being made an outcast in class arrived first; the drama club, the art club, the fashion club, cooking club, and the world Travelers’ club had turned out be made up of some great people.

Adrien, Chloe, and Nathaniel stayed close to Marinette side; each wearing an earpiece.

Jagged Stone in all his rock and roll glory arrived first. Clara Nightingale practically danced her way in. Lois and Clark and the rest of the Kents were a bit more subdued. Though Cat, Nadja, and Lois immediately located rivals and the three could be found gossiping and sharing stories with each other. The same could be said when Style Queen Audrey, Wilhelmina Slater, Gabriel Agreste, and Miranda Priestly. Then it was just a slew of people; from friendly neighbors Marinette grew up with to famous models and actors and chefs.

She immediately greeted Damian with a hug, and thanked him for the perfectly wrapped green present. A second later, Marinette did the same to Peter, and thanked him for the blue present.

The two boys eyed each other.

Marinette looked confused, “Damian I told you about Peter, right? I talked about him all the time. And the same for Damian, Peter.”

“You didn’t mention he was Peter Stark,” Damian stated.

“Peter Stark-Rogers,” Peter corrected. “And you’re Damian Wayne.”

And Marinette finally realized she had forgotten to do one major thing; tell the Avengers and the Justice League that Marinette worked with both of them. Or at the very least Tony Stark and Bruce Wayne who looked ready to bring out the big guns.

Both superhero teams were very much aware of the others superhero identities as the Avengers never hid theirs and Tony hacked into the Watch Tower.

Lex Luther and Oliver Queen, the third and fourth richest men in the world, looked highly amused. While Gabriel looked like Christmas had come early. He had no idea Miss Dupain. He knew allowing Adrien to befriend the girl was smart idea.

The other heroes subtly watched the two for any signs that a fight might break out. Bruce had never forgiven Tony for hacking into the watchtower and uncovering Batman identity.

“Brucie,” Tony grinned and held out his hand. “You’re looking great today. No idea you’d be here. Or that you knew Marinette.”

Bruce shook his hand a bit too firmly, “Her grandmother is an old family friend. I was at her parents’ wedding. I was at their baby shower. I’ve known Marinette for years.”

“We met Marinette when she was five,” Tony said. “She and Peter met at camp. Aren’t they adorable together,” He nodded to the two.

Bruce forced a grin on his face, “Not as cute as she and Damian. They’ve been nearly inseparable since they were ten. Wouldn’t be surprised if hear wedding bells in the future.”

“Of course you will,” Tony laughed. “I’m sure Marinette will invite to her and Peter’s wedding.”

The two glared at each other.

Their significant others just shook their heads. Selena, aka Catwoman, looked amused. While Steve looked so done with this world.

“As one of Peter’s godfather’s,” Bucky said. “Should I be offering to fight Damian’s godfather?” He joked.

Clark glared, his eyes turning a bit red, “Anytime you want.”

Rhodey slapped Bucky on the back, “That’s all you man.” He was not fighting Superman over a case of puppy love.

Diana looked a bit confused, “Should I engage in mortal combat with Peter’s godmother then?”

Pepper crossed her arms, feeling last of the extremis still pumping through her blood.

Natasha’s eyes narrowed, “It’s not required. But I wouldn’t mind a friendly spar or two.”

“You are the Black Widow, yes?” Diana asked. “A most excellent fight it will be then.”

“Where is Shazaam?” Thor’s voice thundered. “I wish for a fight as well.”

Billy Batson had never been so happy that he wasn’t in his superhero form before. Quietly, he made his way to the Ferris wheel. He was going to avoid the god of thunder for as long as he possibly could.

The magic users found each and decided to compare their abilities. It didn’t go well. Clint got turned into a frog… again.

When Fury arrived he eyed the superheroes that were there; avengers, justice league, and the ones (dare devil, Jessica Jones, the Xmen) who were mostly unaffiliated. And briefly wondered if the kid who had hogtied him was planning world domination. He wouldn’t doubt it.

The rest of the part went really well. Chloe, Adrien, and Nathaniel watched the superheroes in attendance like hawks. And were forced to break up more than one fight, or arm wrestling match that got out of hand. It ended up trending on social media, as various celebrities had posted pictures of themselves at the party. And then suddenly the world was asking wanted to know just Who Marinette Dupain-Cheng was. Marinette took that moment to announce that she was MDC. Which blew up the story even more.

The only downside was that Peter and Damian seemed to have entered into a competition of some sort, the same with their fathers.

At the end of the party, when sayings the goodbyes, Marinette swore she distinctly heard, Tony hiss, “Spiderbug forever!”

“Daminette!” Bruce snarled back.

And she had vocally asked why Bucky was giving Superman wary glances but no one would tell her. Adults were weird.

Monday came and the entire school, and all of Paris was buzzing about Marinette’s party. When she got to class, she was met with unhappy faces of her ex-friends.

“They wouldn’t let us inside,” Alya was quick to complain the moment the bluenette stepped through the door.

“We even told them we knew you,” Nino frowned. “The Bouncers didn’t believe we were invited.”

Marinette shrugged as she went to her seat between Adrien and Chloe, “its invitation only. What happened to your invitations?”

All the students frowned. They had been told the same thing at the door. And had been miserable when they remembered they destroyed the invites. Even Lila had nearly shed real tears when she saw just who she had missed meeting for real.

Alya crossed her arms, “We tried calling you. But you changed your number! How could you not tell your bestie you changed your number? When did you change your number?”

“When I realized you still had it.” It was a cold response. One that Damien would’ve been proud of. “And I’m not your bestie. We’re not friends, remember? Why did you even try to come to my party, you were too busy last I checked.”

“That’s before we saw how awesome your party was!” Kim said honestly. “Dude who knew you knew so many celebrities.”

“Prince Ali was there!” Rose said excitedly. “I really wanted to see him.”

“Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Lex Luther,” Max whined. “I was so close but so far.”

That was pretty much how the rest of the morning went, with a side of her ex-friends trying to question Marinette about being MDC and all the celebrities she knew. Marinette didn’t answer a single question.

Just before the lunch bell rang, there was a knock on the door, “Hello, I’m here to pick up Marinette for lunch,” Damian Wayne smiled charmingly as he walked in. “My father’s waiting.”

The class gasped. Lila’s mouth dropped.

A second later Peter Stark-Rogers walked in the classroom, “Marinette, you want to go to lunch,” He said excitedly. “Dad’s waiting outside.”

Again the class’s mouth dropped.

Outside of the school, Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark glared at each other.

Marinette looked confusedly at her friends, “Sorry, I didn’t know you guys wanted to go to lunch. Or that you were still in town.” She told them. “It’s okay, though.” She said brightly. “You can join me and Roy.”

As if on cue, Roy Queen walked into the classroom, a big smile on his smile, “Hey Mari, you read-Oh shit!” He said upon seeing Robin and Spiderman. The two heroes sent the Red Arrow twin glares.

Two minutes later both Tony and Bruce’s phones pinged. They opened it and read the texts they got from their sons.

They looked up, and met each other eyes. “We kill Oliver together,” Tony offered.

“Agreed.”

The Green Arrow watched through binoculars from a safe distance, “Long Live Roynette!”

#ml fic #ml salt #daminette #damian wayne #marinette dupen chang #class salt #alya salt #the avengers #justice league

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honorguk · 4 years

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[Bang Chan] » daddy

.•° ✿ °•. navigation

- genre: smut - word count: 2.7K - summary: chan invited you to his studio and didn’t expect for you to get so needy, let alone expect his day to end with jealous sex - kinks/triggers: daddy kink, dom!chan, degradation, spanking + slapping, jealousy, fingering/teasing

With your legs kicked over on the handle of the armchair, you stared at the ceiling, patiently waiting for your boyfriend to turn around and give you some attention.

Chan has invited to the studio today to accompany him at his job, and for the first two hours it was nothing but smiles and giggles - you listened to his tracks and gave suggestions, discussed potential lyrics (being a literature major and all), and laughed at the stories he was telling you about the messy recording sessions, but after the hype and adrenaline of being in his studio for the first time passed, you plopped down on the chair, took out your phone, and you’ve been like so ever since.

The man wasn’t kidding when he said his hours were long, and you were oh-so-confident that you’d pull through his typical work day, doing nothing but giving moral support, but he was too focused, too worked up to even bare a glance at your clothes, or your body.

You licked your lips, hearing the same beat loop playing once again, and propped yourself up from your seat, admiring Chan’s back, neck, hair, and arms from afar. With a small smile, you got up and walked over.

A hand on his shoulder made him jump, and glance up to you standing beside him, looking at the computer screen.

“Coming along, huh?” You tried to get a conversation going.

“Yeah, yeah, I guess so,” his voice was distant and quiet, his head evidently clouded with thoughts before he turned to the screen again, giving it all his attention.

“Chan?”

No response.

You frowned slightly, but didn’t let that get you down. You crossed your arms, him not even noticing your touch disappearing from his shoulder, and made up your mind to find attention elsewhere.

Heading out of the door, you caught a glimpse as Chan whipped his head around at the sound of the door shutting, and you hoped that perhaps he was going to check on where you went, but to no avail, even after a minute of waiting.

You knew where the majority of the members would hang out at this time day, but instead of heading down the hall where they were, you made your way to the right, where another studio was placed, one that was occupied by Han Jisung.

Knocking on the door you heard a loud “Come in!” before you were greeted with a bright smile and hug.

“Y/N! I didn’t know you were here!” Jisung grinned wider and sat down with you on the couch he had placed in the corner of the room, much like Chan. “What a lovely surprise.”

“Thanks, Jisung,” you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, lowering your head a little. Finally, you found someone who’d value your presence for the day. “What’chu working on?”

“Oh, let me show you.”

Jisung took his laptop off the desk and sat back down next to you, a little closer so that his thigh was touching yours. Perhaps he didn’t think much of the physical contact, but knowing how jealous Chan was already of your friendship with his band member, it drew you wild.

Using ‘taking a closer look at the laptop’ as an excuse to inch yourself closer to Han, you propped your elbow on the back of the sofa behind his head, as the boy was giving you a listen and sharing some information about the track.

You felt bad, but the majority of the words he said went in and right out of your ears, and the only thing you were focusing on was manifesting Chan bursting through the door to find your face centimeters away from Jisung’s. Your knees were brought up onto the pillowy couch, your entire body facing the man.

After a few moments, you noticed a little piece of fluff in Han’s black hair, and reached to take it off. With your hand still behind the boy’s head, you heard the door rapidly open and inside burst the first person you were just expecting.

With a smirk on your face, contrasting the surprised gasp that erupted from Jisung, you were facing your boyfriend.

Chan’s face screamed pure jealousy, as his eyes hooded and the scowl that he was trying so hard to hide grew.

“I thought you left,” Chan calmly spoke, directing his cold words at you.

“I just thought I’d be with Jisung for a bit,” You innocently smiled, still picking off the singular piece of fluff off the latter’s hair. “He’s just telling me about the new song.”

Sassy was the only way to describe you, and Chan’s roughering grip on the door handle showed off his forearm’s veins, the sight of his black dress shirt making you feel a slight pool in your panties.

“Right,” he nodded and pressed his lips tight. “I need you in the studio, though, so if you’d kindly leave Jisung alone that’d be great.” Chan didn’t try to hide his anger as he closed the door, footsteps echoing through the hall after.

“What was that..” Jisung furrowed his brows.

“Guess he’s just stressed,” you shrugged, giving the boy doe eyes and excused yourself, apologizing for such a short visit, and going out.

Your walk was slow, a small knot of anxiety building in your gut as you strided right towards Chan’s studio.

As you walked closer, you saw Chan leaning his back against the door of his room, arms crossed against his chest and his eyes directed at the wall across him. He didn’t look at you at first, and only did so after getting a tight grip on your wrist, pushing you against the wall.

“What the fuck?” He scowled, taking your second wrist and doing the same thing, his face less than an inch away from yours.

You stayed silent and gasped when you suddenly felt him place his leg between your thighs, pressing his own thighs and crotch against you. Turning your face to the side was useless as he simply took your jaw and made your eyes lock with his once more, placing a rough kiss on your lips.

You tried departing to take a breath but Chan wouldn’t budge, pressing you farther into the wall and biting your bottom lip before pushing you inside the studio and locking the door behind him.

“You think you can just go and get attention from some other guy without me noticing, huh?” He walked towards you, you trekking backwards before falling into the chair the man in front of you was previously on. “You really aren’t afraid anymore..” His eyes darkened with lust as he mumbled to himself.

On the contrary, your eyes were widened, and all the sassiness and confidence you had before magically escaped your system. You were gulping, stuttering to find a response, watching as Chan quickly kneeled in front of the seat and forced open your thighs.

His face got dangerously close to your soaking heat yet he still kept eye contact.

“When you’re asked a question, you answer, or have you lost all manners, too?” He spoke through gritted teeth, a finger tracing your core through the fabric.

“I-I’m sorry, C-Chan,” you tried to speak through shaky breaths, nervous as to what was to come.

“You’re not sorry,” he stood up with a smirk and leaned his face closer to yours, lips travelling to your ear. “And you better call me daddy from now on.”

Something about his husky voice sent shivers down your spine, reflecting in the pooling in the pooling in your underwear. He sighed and chuckled lowly, seeing you squirming in his seat, and unexpectedly picked you up, throwing you over his lap.

“Count with me,” Chan commanded, flipping your skirt over and leaving your ass exposed.

Slap. “O-one.”

Slap. “Two.”

Chan proceeded to spank your ass until he saw the red handprints staying on for a while, increasing the strength of his slaps with each one. You hissed after the tenth one, and started tearing up at number 15.

Finally, at twenty, Chan kneaded your asscheck and went down to bite it, and you felt him smile.

“So, baby girl, you’re gonna keep flirting with Jisung over there, or have you learned your lesson?”

Not knowing how to answer you stayed silent, and heard Chan tsk.

“Not good enough,” he flipped you so that you sat on his lap, your legs spread wider than his and ass resting right by the growing bulge in his pants.

His hand traveled to your dripping core as his digits made their way under your panties, slowly starting to rub circles into your clit. Whimpers escaped you as you felt him play with your entrance, his throbbing member pressed tightly under you.

“You like this, huh? Being all small and weak in front of me?” Chan hushly spoke into your ear. “Where’s all that confidence you had when you were being a little slut with Jisung?”

A small slap was delivered to your face, making you moan a little. This was something new that neither of you had talked about bringing into sex before, and you never thought you’d enjoy his degradation as much as you did.

“Answer me,” he spoke, gripping your jaw to turn your neck so you could face him. His lips pressed against yours and you moaned into his mouth once you felt two of his digits enter you, starting to thrust harshly. Your sweet spot was touched each time he curled his fingers, pumping in and out as he sucked on your neck.

“I-I was just trying t-to make you jealous,” you managed to force out. “You didn’t p-pay attention to m-me..”

“Oh, is that right, baby girl?” The nickname came back as his second hand traveled and his finger connected with your clit. The sensation of sitting there with your legs raised over his while he devilishly played with you made you melt, his bipolar degradation getting the best of you. “Well then, if you start something like that, you better handle the consequences.”

You gulped and tried to stifle your moan, feeling a knot built up in your stomach from the entire situation.

“Daddy p-please..I’m gonna-”

Instantly, you felt empty as both of his hands exited from under your tearing panties and pressed against your waist. “You’re gonna what?”

You whined as he teased, feeling him smirk against you as he played with the hem of your skirt. Soon, he pulled the back of it over, tucking some of it under the skirt’s waistband so it didn’t get in the way of the view.

You were in panties that barely covered you, ones he already managed to take a good look at while you were bent over his lap. This time, he raised you just a little to unbutton his jeans and slide them down just enough to take out his cock, which was already dripping with precum.

He stroked it for a few moments before making you sit down on it. The sensation of his shaft against your folds made you desperate, as you squirmed on his lap, making his cock twitch underneath you.

“Please, Daddy, please let me feel you inside me,” you begged, surprising yourself with how needy you sounded. There was no going back now as your craving only turned him on even more, making him glide and tap the tip of his dick on your ass and entrance.

Finally, after a few more moments he brought your hips a little closer so that you were leaning you back on his as he took hold of the bottom of his cock, slowly guiding it to find your core. You moaned as he slipped in only the tip, and you tried to push your hips down to feel more of him inside.

It was to no use as this was Chan’s way of punishing you, teasing you into oblivion. He took it out, and then put it back in, continuing the motion for some time and sliding another few centimeters more of his length in you each time. Finally, without much warning, he slowly slid fully inside you, his hands cupping your breasts from behind.

You moaned and tried to grab the nearest closest thing, which was the bottom of the chair you both were sitting on. Grasping it until your knuckles turned white, Chan proceeded to roughly yet slowly slide in and out of you, both of your hips moving in unison.

“Fuck, baby girl,” he moaned, a buzz starting to form in his body. Before this, your moans were contained and hushed, but after the man picked up speed, his large hand had to be clasped over your mouth to prevent you from making louder sounds.

You couldn’t help it - the build up from the teasing and the rush of anger Chan was feeling was doing so much to your body, and you were whimpering like crazy.

To your luck, Chan soon put his hand down from your mouth and unbuttoned some of the buttons on your shirt, making him have a full view of your bouncing breasts. The studio being semi-soundproof allowed you to be more free with your moans, and Chan’s encouragement only added to your desire.

“Moan for me, you little slut,” he switched the nicknames and the roughness of his actions as you noticed out of the corner of your eye him press a little button on his turned on laptop. You didn’t give it much thought, being engulfed by Chris’ arms as they explored your body, one of his digits finding a way back to your clit not long after.

“You gonna make me jealous again?” He panted. You shook your head to signal no, only earning another small slap on the face after.

“N-no, daddy,” you lied as he pounded harder into you with each second that followed. You could tell from the sloppiness of his moves that he was getting closer, and you couldn’t contain your excitement.

This felt so wrong yet so right - sneaking away to fuck in a locked studio. Both of you were moaning endlessly, getting closer to reaching your high, and right before you thought it was smooth-sailing, Chan began to command you again.

“I-I’m so close,” you whimpered, shutting your eyes hard enough to feel a small welling in your eyes from the pleasure.

“Hold it for daddy,” he strictly told.

You tried your best, you really did, but when time came for it, there was no stopping.

“I-I’m gonna-I’m gonna-” You interrupted yourself as you let the sensation of your orgasm wash over you, his thrusts slowing as he filled you up with his own warm liquid, hiding his face in your neck to groan.

He proceeded to move his hips while riding out both of your climaxes, which made you stick out your tongue and lean back onto your boyfriend, giving him a full view of your fucked out expression. He took his tongue between his lips and sucked before kissing you, and finally, he lifted you just a little so that he could pull out.

Chan’s arms enveloped you for a moment before he reached over to press the same button on his computer again, and kissed your neck.

“Fuck, baby,” he mumbled into you. “You have me going crazy.”

You giggled and you felt him smile against you, placing his hand around your neck.

“You think it’s funny?” He teased jokingly, peppering kisses all over your face. His playful yet still dominating persona was back, and you couldn’t tell at this point which one you liked best. “Well, you’re gonna think it’s hilarious when I use those sweet little moans of yours in a song.”

Now understanding the reasoning behind his button-pressing, you whipped your head around to face him with widened eyes, trying to non-verbally communicate to him that he can’t do that, but he simply smirked in return and took your waist, making both of you stand up.

You stood and watched him buckle up his pants, still in shock for his next production plans and he looked at you with a warm smile. Kissing your forehead, he pulled away and told you with a wink, “At least that’s better than using that sex tape of ours for a video.”

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professorsnape394 · 3 years

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The Potions Master’s Apprentice

Chapter Ten: Breaking Boundaries

A/N: This is the tenth part to my fanfiction ‘The Potions Master’s Apprentice (Severus Snape x OC)’. Chapters 1-16 can be found already uploaded on Wattpad under the same name. Feel free to leave requests in my inbox for anything Snape related you want me to write. Leave a comment below if you wish to be added to my tag list.

Pairing: Severus Snape x OC (Dumbledore’s Granddaughter)

Summary: A talented young witch is employed as an apprentice professor at Hogwarts, but who will she be working under? Severus Snape is not best pleased with his new responsibility of taking on an apprentice, however she is relentless to create a friendship between them. Will she be successful? Or might the friendship just go a little two far? With the eyes of her grandfather constantly watching over them, an attempt at a relationship might not be in the cards for Aria Dumbledore and Severus Snape.

Word Count: 3188

Warnings: mentions of male sex organ and sexual arousal.

Credits to Gif Creator

After a long day of lessons all Aria Dumbledore wanted to do was rip off her uncomfortable heels and change into something she could relax in for the rest of the night. However working with Severus meant that her day did not end immediately after lessons like the other professors' did. With the amount of essays Snape gave out on the daily, it was a miracle he was able to mark them at all, with or without her. She understood now why he never slept, but what she couldn't wrap her head around was why he gave out so many essay in the first place.

At first Severus refused any help from Aria, insisting he didn't need an assistant, but gradually Aria managed to work her way into his routine and soon enough the pair were spending every night together in Snape's classroom, marking essays and making potions.

"Severus." Aria spoke up, as the teachers departed from the Great Hall after dinner, stopping Snape in his tracks. She let her hand rest lightly on his bicep for a second, allowing herself to fall in line as they returned to the dungeons together.

"Miss Dumbledore." He replied coldly, suppressing any thoughts that may have dared entered his mind when he felt her gentle touch on his arm.

"I was thinking... I know we usually spend the evening marking in the classroom, but its just so cold in there and dark too." Aria started. "And we have to squeeze around the desk, with all those papers- "

"What are you getting at Miss Dumbledore." He droned, looking over his shoulder at the woman.

"How about we switch it up for tonight, maybe do the marking in my quarters? Its warm, I have a fire, with couches we can sit at. And if that's not your thing then your welcome to sit at my desk, but I just can't spend another night breaking my back sitting hunched over one. My feet are killing me in these shoes and I'm sick of freezing to death." Aria continued to rant, waiting for Snape to stop her.

"You can stop trying to convince me. Though I may not appear it, I am not a completely unreasonable man, all you have to do is ask."

"Thank god." She groaned, as they turned the corner to the dungeons.

After collecting two large stacks of papers from the potions classroom, the professors made their way along the corridor to Aria's private quarters. Almost immediately after entering the room Aria kicked off her heels, and threw her cloak over the couch.

"Just make yourself at home, get comfortable. I need to go change."

Severus entered the room awkwardly, clutching onto his papers, not daring to touch anything except the air he occupied. For the first time in a long time he felt out of place at Hogwarts. Snape liked to be in control and the way he was able to do that was keeping to the places where he felt most comfortable and had power. As soon as he agreed to spend the evening in Aria's quarters he lost that power and the ability to feel like he had any superiority over the woman. Though he hated feeling out of place, he enjoyed the woman's company, despite the fact he pretended not to, and was willing to make a sacrifice or two in order to listen to her meaningless chatter.

The man slowly made his way around the room, gradually drifting towards her cluttered desk, dropping his papers amongst her own small stacks. Snape couldn't help but be drawn to an open letter Aria had left. His eyes scanned the letter, sickened by its mushy context, but he couldn't seem to pull his gaze away.

Severus was stunned to discover that Aria was in a relationship and yet had not mentioned it to anyone since her arrival. She seemed the type who would boast about the fact, telling everyone and anyone who would listen. It dawned on him that maybe she had mentioned it before, just not to him. After all, why would she? He didn't show any interest in her life, or share any information about himself with her. He had made it pretty clear that they weren't anything more than coworkers, so then why was he hurt by the fact she had not confided in him?

The thought quickly left his mind when the witch reentered the room, leaving him slightly dumbfounded. It was the first time he had witnessed her looking relaxed and casual opposed to the straight laced, well put together façade she put on around the students. Even before the start of term and on their trip to Hogsmeade she maintained an air of sophistication. Looking at her now she appeared as you would expect a 21 year old to appear. Her hair fell around her face in stunning natural beach waves, still a little messy from being held up in a bun all day. She had changed out of her painful heels and uncomfortable work clothes and now appeared in a pair of tight fitting exercise shorts paired with a large oversized t-shirt, that exposed her tanned shoulder and collarbone. Severus couldn't help but notice her lack of bra, but made a conscious effort to keep his gaze fixated on her face.

"What are you doing?" Aria laughed nervously, noticing her mentor standing awkwardly by her desk, staring at her a little too long.

"I was merely looking for a place to conduct my marking, but as the only work space in the room is full of meaningless clutter, then it seems I have no other choice than to move." He growled, over compensating for his earlier thoughts.

Aria went to object but decided it wasn't worth the hassle and simply grabbed her pile and took a seat next to Severus on the couch and got to working.

Seeing Aria in her natural form had Severus mesmerised. He had of course appreciated her attractiveness many times before, but now her beauty seemed more down to earth and natural. He couldn't take his eyes off her. Ever since she had come to his office and bandaged him up, his mind was swarming with thoughts of her once more. The way her fingers gently traced the patterns on his palm as she carefully tended to his wound. Every time he replayed the action in his head a wave of shivers ran up his spine, sending flutters straight to his stomach.

After marking a less than adequate amount of essays, Severus finally gave up trying. Out the corner of his eye he couldn't help but watch as Aria absentmindedly brushed one of her smooth bare legs against the other. His eyes continued to travel up her body, resting for second on a small section of her waist that had been left exposed from the way her top had shifted. Once again he couldn't help but notice the prominent outline of her bare breasts through the slightly transparent shirt. Snape felt his face flush with colour, and chose to swiftly move on. He became entranced as his gaze fell upon her face, watching her read intently, as she nibbled on the end of her quill, letting it bounce slightly between her teeth. Severus could not help his mind rush to a number of scenarios which he quickly dismissed.

Oblivious to the thoughts running through her colleagues mind, Aria continued marking the majority of her essays, before finally giving up.

"How about we take a little break." Aria suggested, throwing another essay on her 'done' pile.

"Very well." Severus agreed, not that he had been doing much anyway.

Aria took the opportunity to stretch her bones, turning her body to face Snape.

"you know, we spend a hell of a lot of time together, but all we ever do is work." Aria commented, standing up from where she had been sat on the couch.

"What are you getting at, Miss Dumbledore." Snape replied, turning his attention to a neglected book he found resting on her coffee table.

"I'm just saying that we're allowed to spend time together, without making it about work. Minerva and I often enjoy afternoon tea together, and I frequently visit Hagrid at his cabin for a chat, I don't see why we have to pretend to be marking essays just to be in each others company."

"I'm not pretending to do anything, Miss Dumbledore. The essays need to be marked, and whether you chose to help me or not, I will be spending my evenings doing the exact same thing either way."

Severus picked up a rogue book from her coffee table, dog-earing the page Aria had left the book lying open on and began to read from the beginning, curious to see what kind of literature she was interested in.

Meanwhile Aria had made her way through to her open plan kitchen and was currently rummaging through a number of cupboards but continued her conversation.

"We're the teachers Severus, the students will get the essays back when we say so, we do not have to rush to complete them as soon as they're handed back to us. Besides it would give the students a little more time in between essays to relax before they were immediately issued another." The clinking of glasses caught Severus' attention, so he too got up, meeting the woman in her kitchen.

"Have a drink." She offered, handing him a glass of deep red liquid, hoping to loosen up his inhibitions.

"I thought you didn't drink." Snape muttered, taking the drink from her.

"Like I said before, I don't drink often, or rather to excess. But if this is what it takes to get you to relax with me, then I'm willing to comprise." She winked, holding up her own glass to cheers the other professor.

"Despite the impression you may have gotten, Miss Dumbledore, I do not rely on alcohol to get through the day."

"I know that." Aria spoke, her tone becoming sadder. "I know that you were drinking a lot before the start of term because of me. I'm sorry I done that to you, I honestly did not think that the two of us having dinner together would be such a scandal. I was wrong, I know that now. But can't we just remain colleagues who enjoy each others company every once in a while." She hoped.

Severus took a deep intake of breath before taking a large gulp of wine.

"You were not the reason I turned to alcohol to drown my sorrows, Miss Dumbledore. Yes, I enjoy a glass of FireWhiskey or Nettle Wine once in a while, and occasionally I feel the need to indulge more than what is deemed appropriate. Usually it occurs in the summer and I have no one around me who cares. It only ever lasts a few days or so, a week at most, and after that I get back on track and its no longer a problem. It is true that your presence may have dug up some unfortunate memories of mine, but it was not your fault." Severus enunciated the last few words of his sentence, reassuring the woman not to blame herself for his small moment of weakness. The way her eyes sparkled in the light as they met his sent a wave of regret over him, wishing he had just accepted the wine and said nothing. An appreciated smile spread across his apprentice's face, thankful she had been reassured.

Professor Snape gulped down some more his of wine nervously, making his way back to the couch, Aria followed closely behind.

"So." He started, once again picking up the abandoned book, eager to change to subject. "I noticed your reading Pride and Prejudice, how are you finding it?"

"Oh." She smiled, biting her lip, slightly embarrassed. "It's one I'm currently reading." She said vaguely, bouncing down on the couch, sitting crossed legged.

"So your into muggle literature? I have read a few myself though I tend to stay away from the Brontes."

"It's Austen actually." She corrected, nodding towards the spine of the book, cradling her still relatively full glass of wine. "I have to admit, I'm a bit useless when it comes to reading. I love it so much, but I'm just too impatient, that's my problem." She laughed, getting frustrated with herself and running a hand through her tangled mass of hair.

Severus watched as she jumped from her seat, quickly collecting a few of the other novels she had left scattered around the place, all of which had been left balancing open mid-page. The woman returned with five or six books in her arms, all of which had been read half way through or almost to the very end, although none had been completely read through.

"I'm a bit of scatter brain, if I'm being completely honest. I've started all of these and every time I find a new book I completely disregard the one I was reading, too eager to start another, before finishing the first. Most of the time I forget where I've left them, so I couldn't finish them even if I wanted to. I swear Severus, If it wasn't for you keeping me on track with the students schedules, I'd go utterly mad and forget what I was supposed to be teaching." Aria let out a huge breath, dropping all of the books down in between her and Snape, before plopping herself down once more.

Snape suppressed the urge to laugh at the woman's dopiness, she was truly a character, but he secretly adored the absurdness she possessed. She kept it hidden so well in front of her grandfather and the students but often when they were alone she allowed her true personality to shine and that is when Severus felt his weakest with her. He could not possibly find a reason to be angry at her when she was feeling vulnerable enough to get comfortable around him.

The Potions Master took it upon himself to inspect each of the novels, before setting them aside, neatly piled high. He did, however, keep a hold of the original book, continuing from where he had left off.

Noticing the man getting engrossed in the book, Aria chose not to bother him with any more of her idle chatter and instead grabbed a notebook and quill from her bedroom and begun sketching. She was content with just being in each other's company and not working that she didn't mind that they were not talking. In fact, one of the things she loved most about their relationship was that they were able to sit in a comfortable silence without either of them feeling awkward.

After a few attempts of sketching objects around the room, she gave in trying and decided to focus on what she drew best. Not wanting to interrupt his train of thought by asking a meaningless question, such as if he would give her permission to draw him, Aria didn't see the big deal and went ahead with her sketch.

An hour or so passed and the couple were deep in their activities and not a word had been spoken since the last. By now Severus had removed his robes, the heat from the fire proving too much, though he still kept himself fully covered by the means of his overcoat. Aria, far too comfortable in her chambers, had now stretched out across the whole couch, her feet resting gently on the side of Severus' thigh, but he was yet to complain.

It wasn't until almost two hours into their activities that Severus thought too look at the clock. Time had gotten on, and usually the pair would have gone their separate ways by now, spending the rest of their nights alone. Strangely Professor Snape did not feel the urge to depart just yet and chose to stay a while longer. Aria had become absorbed in the sketch she was doing, and was not complaining he was still there. This was good enough for Severus. Looking up from her notepad every few seconds, but still utterly engaged in her drawing, Aria had no idea what was currently going on in Snape's mind.

Once he had broke away from the book back to reality, Snape struggled to get himself to focus again. Instead his mind was preoccupied by how close he had let Aria get to him. He felt her wriggle her toes absentmindedly. It was almost as if she was beating out a tune against his leg, and he was very aware of every movement she made. Her feet had managed to make their way into his lap, and every small movement that brushed against his thigh, had Severus' heart beating faster.

The woman fidgeted relentlessly, her legs shifting in lap and her toes scrunching up against his inner thigh. Snape could not help the reaction his body was having as his assistant brushed against him, but the thoughts that entered his mind, only stimulated the problem he was having. Surely she must know what she was doing to him. The Professor kept his eyes on the page, though he took in none of the words. His face flushed pink, whether from the heat of the fire or his own imagination, he did not know. Snape allowed himself one look at the woman curious to see if her actions were deliberate. As he expected she was completely oblivious to the whole situation, simply sketching away, not a care in the world.

Looking at the woman only worsened the situation. He had tried to keep his thoughts at bay, in order to prevent his throbbing penis from doing what penis' do best. But seeing the young woman lay there in front of him, her body so close to his, rubbing against him. Severus could take it no longer. He felt himself growing, and he refused to endure the humiliation had she to notice, let alone the frustration that he would be able to do nothing about it.

Without warning Snape jumped from his position on the couch, grabbing his robes, and leaving the book where he sat. "It's late. I have to go." Was all he said bluntly, slamming the door as he practically flew from the room.

Aria Dumbledore had no words to say. She was less shocked by his sudden departure than the fact he had actually stayed with her all evening, spending some time together, in their own unique way. Abandoning her pad and quill, Aria slipped into bed, falling asleep almost as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Severus on the other hand did not drift off so easily. He spent half the night damning himself for being so vulnerable and getting himself into that situation, and the other half dreaming of the possibilities that could have happened had he stayed. Though he knew nothing would have happened, even if he wanted it to. She was in a relationship and Snape was not one for physical affection. However, he allowed himself the small luxury of dreaming about her for one night.

Taglist: @ayamenimthiriel

@lizlil

#severus snape #severus snape fanfiction #severus snape one shot #Severus Snape smut #severus snape imagine #severus snape x reader #severus snape x y/n #severus x oc #severus x y/n #severus x reader #Harry Potter #harry potter and the goblet of fire #harry potter fanfiction #alan rickman #dumbledore #dumbledores granddaughter #potions master #potions masters apprentice #severus snape fluff

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disneydreamlights · 2 years

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Fallen Star: Chapter 3

AO3 | FFN

[Previous Fic] [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15]

Chapter Summary: Padme reunites with Anakin, and finally tells him the news.

Fic Summary: The Clone Wars have raged on for three years. With Dooku dead, the war’s end is finally within reach, and peace may come to the galaxy.

For Jedi Knight Padmé Amidala, Senator Anakin Skywalker, and Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi, the world seems to have too many other plans to let it.

[Or, a Revenge of the Sith Roleswap AU]

A/N: This is a week late, so I'm posting this chapter and next now.

I'm good at remembering what day of the week it is and that I need to update I swear.

The ride from the landing strip to the Senate Dome was only a few minutes, but to Padmé as she sat on the transport taking her and Obi-Wan back to speak to the politicians, it felt as though it might have been hours. She looked out the windows, watching the buildings of Coruscant fly by, unable to ignore the anxiety that was starting to build as she finally would get to see her husband after so long away.

“Padmé?” She looked up towards Obi-Wan, who had chosen to stand while she simply sat hunched over, in her Jedi robes. He waited patiently for a moment, but sighed when she didn’t respond. “Padmé, are you alright?”

“Physically or mentally?” The answer to both might have been a no, if she was honest. The excitement of the day combined with the strain of her turbulent pregnancy had left Padmé in a worse state of exhaustion than even the war had, and mentally...telling your husband you haven’t seen in six months you’ve been pregnant with his child while fighting in a war was not bound to win her any empathy. Obi-Wan gave her a look, so she sighed. “I don’t know how I’m going to tell Anakin. It wasn’t supposed to happen.”

Her master thought they had a one night stand, a stupid mistake where some alcohol had reminded them of some feelings they’d long since abandoned and a mistake had been made, but that didn’t make the truth any less real. She already loved the baby growing inside of her, but they never should have happened.

“Just tell him. He’s Anakin. He’d be no more capable of hating you or that child than I was when you told me.” She still remembered that night well. At first Obi-Wan had been upset, she’d felt it in the Force, but it had quickly melted away for concern and a desire to help her through those weeks when Anakin couldn’t, and a claim on one of her child as his next Padawan. “You’re both too close to let something like this destroy your friendship, there’s no sense in denying that.”

Padmé hugged him. “Thank you, Master. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“I’ll always be here.” He helped her up, and she made sure to adjust her robes to hide her stomach, so as not to attract any attention from the Senate as they docked. “Unless, of course, you want help dealing with politicians.”

She held back a laugh. “Still not a fan?”

“Anakin might be one of the only politicians I can remotely tolerate, and that’s just because he’s Anakin.” Obi-Wan smiled. “Still though, you are the hero for the day, and somebody will need to report to the Jedi Council, and I’m willing to bet you’d like to avoid that as long as possible.”

“Oh, so that’s the favor I get for dealing with politicians.” Not that she minded, it just meant lots of attention she didn’t particularly want when there was only one politician she wanted to see. “Do I get another one for saving your life for the tenth time as well?”

“Ninth Padmé, it’s only been nine times. The business on Cato Neimoidia doesn’t count.” He waved as she got off the transport. Normally, she would argue that it totally did, but she could still feel the butterflies flying around in her. She could let him have that one, at least. “I’ll see you at the temple tomorrow morning for when we get our next assignment?”

“I’ll be there.” Whether Obi-Wan knew the blessing he was giving her by letting her stay the night at Anakin’s, Padmé wasn’t sure, but she appreciated him either way for it more than ever as she merged into the crowd of politicians, her eyes skimming for Anakin as she listened in on the conversations.

“Chancellor Palpatine, are you alright?” The Mace bowed as Palpatine approached, a smile on his face.

“Yes, thanks to your two Jedi Knights.” She could hear the smile in his voice momentarily before it fell, and unbidden, Padmé remembered the point he had brought up on the Invisible Hand. Was he only faking his happiness to avoid revealing his suspicions as to the fact that Dooku had a sympathetic ear among the Jedi? “They killed Count Dooku but General Grievous has escaped once again.”

“General Grievous will run and hide as he always does. He’s a coward.”

“But with Count Dooku dead, he is the leader of the Droid Army.” With her limited knowledge of politics, even Padmé could pick up the underlying threat in Palpatine’s words. “And I assure you the Senate will vote to continue the war as long as Grievous is alive.”

Mace began walking away, following after the Chancellor. “Then the Jedi Council will make finding Grievous our top priority as long as he is alive.”

She went to follow after them when she felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see Senator Bail Organa. “General Naberrie.”

“Senator Organa. I’m happy to see you.” She smiled back at him, truly relieved to see one of Anakin’s friends. “It’s been too long since I’ve been on Coruscant.”

“So it has, I’m assuming you’ll be busy for quite some time?” he asked, watching her with a mild interest.

Padmé shook her head. “I’m hoping to be posted on Coruscant, at least at the moment. It’s been a while since I was away from the front, and while I don’t need too much rest, Obi-Wan and I could both use a few nights of peace. That is, if the war continues for much longer.” Bail looked at her, surprised. “If we kill General Grievous, there won’t be any commanders skilled enough to lead their army. It’ll fall apart, and leave the Separatists open for peace talks once and for all.”

“Of course. I hope your predictions are correct, this war has gone on too long.” For all of them, even the Senators in their lofty dome, the war had become taxing, and at times it was difficult to remember why she was even fighting in it. She understood what Bail was saying all too well.

“Senator Organa.” Anakin’s voice as he was standing there, smiling at the two of them, pulled Padmé’s attention away from the conversation. “Would you mind if I have a word with Knight Naberrie?”

Bail smiled. “Not at all. Senator Skywalker, I’m sure you’re looking forward to seeing her as well.” Bail left without another word, and the moment they were alone, Padmé couldn’t stop herself. She ran to meet Anakin as he lifted her into the air with a spin. Six months was definitely too long a period of time. More than anything else, she missed him. She missed getting to hug her husband.

The moment her feet touched the ground, Anakin tucked her head under his chin, holding onto her as though nothing else mattered and like he never wanted to let go. She let him hold her as she just enjoyed the moment, saying nothing. “I missed you.” For a moment, she wasn’t sure if she had heard him, though she realized quickly what he had said.

“I missed you too.” And she had, more than she could ever say. “I thought I’d never get to come back to Coruscant.”

“It doesn’t matter what you thought, what matters is you’re back, and you’re okay, even if it’s for only a minute it’s all I care about.” And he kissed her, and for a moment she let herself get carried away in it. It was just them, it could be another stolen moment like so many they’d had in the war, and Padmé didn’t ever want to leave that moment.

But it wasn’t like all the others, their relationship already had a consequence, a wonderful, dangerous consequence, and so she pulled away, and rather than question he simply held her close, expecting her to speak when she was ready.

“Ani, I…” She trailed off, unable to continue.

“Padmé, what’s wrong? You’re trembling.” He let go of her, and she found herself lost in the intensity of his gaze. “Did something happen?”

“It’s not wrong, I’m just scared.” She took a deep breath and attempted to release her fear into the force, but it was lodged deep in her heart. Anakin meant too much to her now; to lose him would destroy her.

Anakin kissed her forehead. “I’m not going anywhere. Whatever it is, no matter how bad it is, we’ll get through it together.”

Padmé nodded. “It’s not bad, if...if I wasn’t a Jedi, it’d be good.” She needed to stop beating around the bush, but she needed to at least keep Anakin from worrying first. He looked at her, hesitant, but at least less concerned than he had been previously. “I’m pregnant.”

The word hung in the air between them for a moment. Anakin seemed to have frozen solid trying to understand, and it was hard not to blame him given he was going to be a father at twenty-three. Still, the fact that he didn’t answer began to worry her as the silence started to drag out.

Before she could question his feelings on it, however, he burst into a smile, bigger than any he’d given her except perhaps on their wedding night after they’d exchanged their vows to belong to each other, and she felt nothing but pure happiness. “That’s...that’s wonderful.”

She couldn’t help the smile that formed on her face in response as he pulled her in close.

Anakin being supportive of their child was already one problem off of Padmé’s list and maybe, things might finally start to really look up.

-x-

It hadn’t taken long for Anakin to rush them out of the Senate upon learning Padmé was pregnant. He’d scarcely had time to tell his mother to handle any requests from Bail if they came and to cancel the rest of his meetings before running to his speeder to go home, where he sat now in his apartment with Padmé beside him, telling him about her missions and everything that had changed since they’d last been able to call.

“That day was awful.” She stifled a yawn, clearly tired. “We’d just finished up another battle against some battle droids and then I threw up. Rex was so worried and I had to explain to him it was because of the baby and not something to be worried about.”

Anakin wanted to ask about the pregnancy. He’d missed so much of it because of the war, but whenever he’d tried to broach it and their child in an attempt to figure out what was going on, she’d skirt the subject, probably sensing his regret and guilt. Why hadn’t he ended the war sooner, or convinced the Jedi to bring Padmé home when he knew she had been doing awful during their last call? Why hadn’t she tried to come home sooner?

It wasn’t worth asking right now. He didn’t want to risk upsetting her. Tonight was all about a break from their stressful lives, and Anakin was happy to both give her that break and take one himself. “Where is Rex anyways? I didn’t hear anything from him during the battle.”

“I hadn’t gotten to that yet.” She let out a small laugh. “Ahsoka contacted us while we were in the Outer Rim. She and Rex are leading part of the 501st on Mandalore to deal with Maul.”

“Snips?” Anakin sat up as she said that. “She’s alright?” He remembered how hurt Padmé had been when Ahsoka had left, how she’d felt that she’d failed her Padawan in not protecting her enough during everything. To hear that she was okay…

But rather than give a full answer, Padmé simply shrugged. “She was in a rush to deal with what happened on Mandalore, we didn’t talk long for me to know much more. She...wasn’t happy we went to Coruscant to help.”

Anakin simply held her. “She came to you for help, and you gave it to her. When you guys see each other again, you can catch up.” Knowing where her misplaced guilt was coming from, he added, “She doesn’t blame you, Angel. You did everything you could.”

“I know.” Padmé nodded, though whether she believed him or not he couldn’t say. “I’ve been thinking about the baby...about what I should do.”

The fact that she’d changed the subject to the pregnancy and their responsibility involving it to avoid speaking of Ahsoka spoke volumes for how much she wanted to avoid the topic, and how much she needed to talk about it, but Anakin wouldn’t press. “About sending them to the Temple to become Jedi?”

Padmé nodded. “And other things. If I remain with the Jedi, I won’t be able to claim them as my own. They’ll know I’m their mother, and they’ll know you’re their father, but…”

But she wouldn’t be able to be their mother so long as she remained there. If they were raised with the Jedi, she could teach them while they were still in the creche, perhaps even become their Jedi Master, but never more than that. If they stayed with him, then she would possibly be even less. “You could leave the Order.”

“You know I can’t. Once the war’s over, the Jedi will go back to being peacekeepers, everything I’ve always wanted to be.” With the title of general that Padmé had taken to as the war went on, sometimes it was hard for Anakin to remember how much she hated all the fighting. “But I want you to raise them, Anakin. If our child wants to become a Jedi, then they can make that choice, but I want you to be a part of their life no matter what.”

“You want…?” She…

“They’ll be the first freeborn Skywalker.” Padmé smiled at him, and Anakin tried to open his mouth before shutting it. Even with how tired she was, pregnant with their child, she knew just how much that would mean. “I don’t want to take that from you just because they’re gifted with the Force. No matter what, I want them to have a choice in what happens to them.” Before Anakin could kiss her, Padmé ended up laughing. “Although I may have to fight Obi-Wan on that.”

Anakin laughed at that, mostly because he was startled. “Obi-Wan?”

“He already claimed the baby as his next Padawan.” There was an amused smile on Padmé’s face. “He said I was an easy first Padawan, he can’t imagine any child of ours to be any different.”

“I’ll have to raise her to be just like me then, just so Obi-Wan has a hard time.” He kissed the crown of Padmé’s head. “So he knows?”

“Not everything, but yes Anakin. Somebody had to help me out on the battlefield.” Padmé smiled, though something about it felt empty.

Anakin didn’t have to guess what bothered her. “You hate that you had to lie to him about how this happened.”

“I can’t tell him. He wouldn’t understand.” Given Obi-Wan’s love for his Padawan, Anakin doubted that was the case, but he let her voice it anyways, unable to refute it with little more than the gut feelings he had.

So Anakin did what he did best whenever something upset his wife, he kissed her, pulling her close and serving as the best distraction he could. “Let’s worry about that later. We’re supposed to be celebrating, aren’t we?”

“You’re right.” Padmé gave him another smile, this one more genuine. “I shouldn’t be so focusing on things like this, we have time.”

Though Anakin smiled right alongside her and began working his magic to pull his wife’s attention away from all their troubles, he couldn’t help focusing on his own.

We have time.

He repeated her comment in his head, hoping that if he told himself it enough times that the war, and all of their problems, would end, and that he would be able to believe it.

-x-

It was hot. The temperature around them was boiling, and like the world was ready to burn. She couldn’t see. She couldn’t feel anything, just the air around her.

There was crying, and a ship was leaving. And despite everything she felt she had to get to that ship. She had to be there. Something important was on it.

But even more important was the figure in front of her. In this hot place, lying on the ground, unmoving, was Anakin.

Padmé bolted awake, unable to focus for a moment as she felt the cool air of the apartment in contrast to the super heated air of her dreams, trying to process what had happened. She closed her eyes, immediately releasing her fear into the Force before it took her over. A nightmare. That was all it was. A nightmare.

Before she could get up to do something to clear her head and focus on the nightmare, she felt arms wrap around her torso and turned to look at Anakin, who had likely been woken up by the sudden movement. Before she could ask anything, he spoke. “I felt your fear in the Force, but I wasn’t sleeping.”

Oh. “You weren’t?”

Anakin shook his head. “No.” He didn’t elaborate. He just knew she wasn’t okay and held her, letting her take her time to breathe. It was difficult to process, the last time she’d felt a fear like this was back at the start of the Clone Wars, when Obi-Wan…

She remembered what Anakin had told her on the flight to Geonosis that day, when he’d listened to her fears about her master. It had helped her work through her emotions then...maybe it’d help now? “I had a nightmare.”

Anakin sat up, as though realizing this would be a long conversation, and pulled her into him. “What happened?”

“I’m…” She frowned, unsure of what happened in the dream. “I don’t know. It was disjointed and...difficult to understand.”

“But definitely a nightmare?” Padmé nodded to answer his question. “Do you remember anything?”

“I heard a baby crying.” It wasn’t difficult to imagine where that part of the dream had come from. She put her hand on her growing stomach, feeling the bright light of the life inside. She was nervous about everything to do with the baby. “And I saw you...you were…” That one, she was less certain as to why. She knew Anakin was safe on Coruscant, and he could take care of himself as he’d proven over the course of the war. Anakin dying wasn’t a fear that she normally had to wrestle with at all.

Anakin kissed the top of her head as a show of support. “It was fake, I’m right here.”

Padmé smiled. “I know.” The reassurance did little to make her feel better, she was still on edge. “I’m just...worried.”

“You have a lot to be worried about.” He held her hand. “And I’ll be with you for every step of it.”

“I know.” She locked her hands in his, and they both sat in silence, unable to stop thinking about her dream. “I might talk to Obi-Wan tomorrow.”

“Using him as a therapist?” Anakin teased.

“He is older and wiser.” She was grateful for the momentary change in focus. “He might be able to figure something out about it if we can’t.”

Anakin nodded, letting her figure out what else she may have wanted to say, but she didn’t want to think about her nightmare, at least not tonight as she instead rested her head on him, listening to his heartbeat and letting it calm her down, more than her attempts to release her emotions into the Force and their conversation had at any rate. It was definitive proof that he was alive.

“Why were you awake?” Padmé asked. Anakin remained silent. “Ani?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Anakin.” Was it possible she was using his problems to ignore her own? That was entirely possible, but she wasn’t acknowledging that for the moment, instead wanting to know what was wrong.

“I had a nightmare, don’t worry about it.” He shook his head.

“After you pressured me to reveal mine?” Padmé asked. Anakin remained silent for a moment before finally answering.

“I don’t remember much, just a lot of heat, like I was burning alive.”

Normally, Padmé wouldn’t have thought twice about that nightmare. It wasn’t super uncommon and it wasn’t the first time Anakin had woken up in the night from some kind of terrible dream.

But all she could think about was the fire and heat from her dream as she watched Anakin burn alive.

“Padmé?” Him calling her name shook her out of her worry and dread. This wasn’t something to worry about. It couldn’t be something to worry about. “Is there something else?”

She shook her head. “No, it’s...it’s nothing. Let’s just go back to sleep.” As though he could sense her unwillingness to talk about it, Anakin nodded, pulling her back into bed so she could get some rest.

She relaxed into his arms, listening to his breathing as it evened out and sleep came to him.

She only wished it had come to her as well.

#Star Wars #Anakin Skywalker #Anakin #Obi Wan Kenobi #Obi Wan #Padme Amidala #Padme #Anidala #Heather Writes

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moccahobi · 3 years

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A Spark in the Commons [Yugyeom x Reader]

Pairing: Got7 Yugyeom x GN Reader

Genre: Fluff, Hybrid au, College au, 13+

Word Count: 5.2k

Warnings: Mentions of a panic attack

A/N: This was done for @got7writerscollective‘s flightlog project! It’s my first official got7 fic! So please enjoy!

Summery: You help an anxious deer shifter in the shifter union commons and a friendship buds.

The Shifter Union commons of Seoul University was empty aside from you and the occasional guard who would sweep through to make sure that nothing amiss was happening. Of course nothing ever was on evenings like these where the only person in the commons was an employee getting paid to make sure any shifter in need had someone. Some nights were more wild and full of shifters who were in various states of shifting, but you didn’t like to work those nights. You prefered staffing the less crowded times when there were next to no one in the commons and you could work on homework while getting paid. Even with the occasional person who would come in, the quieter nights were best in your personal opinion.

This evening was one of those quiet nights. You’d been alone in the common space for almost an hour, the last shifter having left after the two of you had a conversation about a class they were taking. It was just as you finished writing your tenth page of your peace studies essay that you felt the strung and pungent smell of burnt toast and something more bitter made you look up to see an anxious deer shifter, his antlers parting his hair as he approached the open common’s room.

“Hello! Welcome to the Seoul University’s shifter union!” You said cautiously, your eyes meeting his large, blown out ones with worry as he finally entered the commons.

The man stopped stiffly, tightly gripping his bag and not breaking eye contact with you, his nose flaring as he sniffed the room. Breaking eye contact first, you gave him a once over, struck by how still he was. You were glad that you took blockers this morning, your predatory raccoon pheromones not filling the room this moment and making the poor shifter feel more anxious and he didn’t need that. Poor man was working himself up enough already.

“How can I help you?”

He didn’t move, a small squeak leaving him.

“Would you like a private room to shift in?” You pointed to a door to the right of you that led to some small rooms sterile for shifters who needed to engage with their animal form privately for a little, “The union has some rooms for people right over there.”

He lowered his eyes which were looking more and more deer-like by the second and quickly walked over to the door that led to the private rooms, closing loudly behind him. A sigh left you as you tried to return to your paper. Many times shifters needed space when their stress and anxiety forced them to shift, but you knew that before the man left you’d need to talk to him.

Part of your job at the shifter union required you to record his use of the room, check in to make sure that he was ok, and that the emergency need of the space wasn’t due to any issues on campus. You worried about him trying to run off the second he calmed down enough to return to his human form, having dealt with many shifters who feared using the union for its help or felt like they had to return to class immediately after a forced shift. They never had to. The union worked out a deal with the school to make sure forced shifts were seen as excused absences if filed through the union. You loved this job and how it allowed you to help your fellow shifters. You’d be damned if you didn’t take your work seriously.

In fact, part of the reason you got on pheromone blockers was to make prey shifters more comfortable around you (the other part simply due to you not enjoying the feeling of heat and regular blockers kept your heat at bay). At the thought of pheromones, you got up, opened one of the windows and lit a candle in an attempt to start breaking up the stress pheromones that hung in the air.

What sounded like a constant clatter of hooves made it hard to focus on your paper. It wasn’t like you could look at what was happening, the rooms had windows high up to allow light in but not let people see what those who were decompressing were doing. Somehow, the noise of the anxious shifter became background clatter and you managed to carve out a good chunk of your essay before you started to hear more… human-like movements in the back space.

Your mind drifted to how you could get his attention without scaring him when he finally exited. There was a chance that he was informed about the processes the commons tries to have when the rooms are used but there is also a chance that he is completely unaware of them. There were many shifters who didn’t know the protocol. Plus, if you did need to get his attention, you didn’t want to startle him or make it look like he was in trouble for using the space for three hours. The decompression rooms were here for moments like this after all. You heard the telltale click of the door opening but before you had time to try to get his attention, he spoke.

“I… thank you for letting me use the room for so long.” His voice was soft and smooth and, unlike last time, you were the one whose eyes widened and felt frozen in place.

He was good looking and smelling when he wasn’t sending off stress pheramones every which way, and his voice… it was so soft.

You floundered for a second before coughing, “N-No problem. They’re here for all shifters. Which room did you end up using? I will want to tell the next person working the union commons to make sure it gets cleaned.”

“I used the room number… 3,” He said while leaning back to verify.

A silence hung in the air after he spoke, he was clearly waiting for you to speak but you were still frozen. He hesitated before slowly walking past you, his eyes trained on you as if waiting to see if you kept talking or if he was free to go.

“Before you go… may I ask…”

You froze… you knew how you were supposed to go about getting the information. You needed to ask for his student ID, name, and why they needed the room… but something about this man was making words hard for you. Your mind was blanking and stuttering as it tried to function.

“Yes?”

“I-If you have time, we like to keep a record of who uses the rooms and why. Mostly just to keep track… but also if you were using it because of…”

Come on, Y/n! You knew this stuff! Why were you struggling so much now?

You sighed, “If it was caused by a staff member or a fellow student, the union can take action to protect your rights as a shifter. There are also options to message professors or coaches to excuse possible absences if the room was used for a stress shift. Also… I, as a worker, um… I work here and part of my job is to be an ear for venting and… all that… I am not a mandatory reporter too so if that is a worry… uhh… don’t.”

He nodded slowly, “Uhh… I have a class… now,” He mumbled and pointed back to the entrance of the commons, “was on my way to it when I got a little… overwhelmed…”

Did he not check his phone yet? Any evening class was going to be done at this time you thought, checking the clock on your computer just to verify.

“Sir, you were in the room for three hours.”

“What?!” His eyes widened and you noticed his pupils grow once again.

Quickly, you jumped up and walked over to where he was standing, “Don’t worry about it! If you give me a list of your professors, I can email them! This can count as an excused absence! There’s no need to worry.”

His eyes seemed to gloss over as he stumbled back slightly, his breaths coming out shift and fast. Quickly, you moved to guide him back to one of the nearest chairs that was only a few steps away and plush, gently rubbing his arm as he took a sharp intake of air and collapsed onto the chair, his horns slowly growing again and pushing some hair back.You got up and locked the door to the union entrance before returning to help. While it was normally policy to keep the door open and unlocked all times a staff member was in, you could risk making sure no one interrupted this moment to make sure this student felt safe (especially since you were a fairly small school and there were only 1000 shifters… out of 5000 students in the school and it was dinner rush).

By the time you did make it back to him, he was starting to hyperventilate, his eyes distant and his antlers growing by the second. At this point, his distress pheromones were making the air heavy and hard to breath in and you were thankful that the window was open. You simply sat next to him and waited. At this point, if you tried to touch him, he would likely feel even more panicked and you didn’t want to do anything that could possibly harm him. Panic attacks were hard enough without any extra stressors.

The panic attack came in waves and you sat with him through it until he was able to speak some, but instead of letting him even think about apologizing, you simply started to ask him about the room. How many grey items were there? Purple? Green? And so forth until his breathing was calmer and you stopped being showered in his stress pheromones.

“My name’s Yugyeom, by the way.” He said after a minute of silence when he finally calmed down more.

“Nice to meet you Yugyeom, I’m Y/n.”

As it turned out, Yugyeom was a transfer just a year below you and had just declared his major the day he came in. You could easily see how the stress of being a transfer, with a human roommate (who didn’t want him to shift), delaring, and the start of a seven week night course could compound. That night, the two of you talked until Yejin, one of your coworkers came for her shift and forced you out so that you could get some sleep. The two of you left in a fit of laughs and then walked around campus and talked even more until you barely had enough money to drive back to your apartment. Despite how the night started, it was probably the best night of your whole week and you were hoping to talk to Yugyeom whenever you saw him next to get his number and hopefully hang out… Although you were tempted to try to pursue a romantic relationship as well.

The thing was, that after that night you didn’t see him for a whole week! You’d see his name on the record of people who used the shifting rooms, would sometimes have to clean up after him, and even saw him around campus some. Sadly, it seemed as if your schedules never matched up to see eachother again and despite all the near meet-ups, you didn’t have a chance to talk to him again. You wanted to as well… you were worried about the anxious transfer student and wanted to make sure that he was doing ok.

Part of you wanted to seek him out. The campus was small and you were fairly positive that the two of you saw glimpses of each other (and just didn’t realize) so seeking him out wouldn’t be too hard to do. That part of you was overshadowed by a worry that he didn’t want to try to have a friendship with you or the little flirting you did near the end of the night was too much and now he never wanted to talk to you again. Of course it was a mostly irrational fear (hopefully), but it kept you from trying to find Yugyeom.

. Just as you were starting to give up hope of seeing him again, you were proven wrong. It was another late shift at the shifter union and since you didn’t have any dier work that needed to be done, you simply sat one one of the couches and read.You were still present in case anyone wanted to be in the space, but you were trying to relax. It was somewhat hard though as you were also very aware of the security guard who was slowly meandering around the unions commons and making sure that everything was ok. As the guard spent more and more time slowly walking around the commons, you started paying less and less attention to your book, instead your senses honing in on the guard. It was likely due to your raccoon part that you felt so cautious around the guard but the longer he stuck in the union commons, the worse you felt about him.

He was taking glances at you. Maybe he was just double checking to make sure all was alright but your mind started to wander. You hadn’t had issues with this guard but you knew that some of the security guards were iffy around the shifters they thought they could dominere. Part of you wished that you weren’t on pheromone blockers so you could show him that you were not a shifter to be messed with. That you could be intimidating and a force to be reckoned with. Technically raccoons were apex predators.

Before your mind started to wander further about how you could intimidate or protect yourself against the guard, the union door opened and the smell of Yugyeom filled your senses. Almost as soon as it hit your nostrils, you felt yourself relax. Part of you told yourself that it was simply due to having another person in the room and a male shifter at that (another part of you swooned when you caught a glimpse of Yugyeom in all his glory).

The guard huffed and, as Yugyeom started to settle into a seat somewhat near you, the guard left the room. As he left, you wondered what he was thinking and if he actually wanted to try something or if your anxiety was all in your head. You really hoped it was all in your head.

Slowly, you relaxed in your seat, part of your brain still focusing on Yugyeom while you tried to continue reading. His smell comforted you. You didn’t know why, but you didn’t feel the need to question it. Instead, you simply settled further into your chair and focused on your book again, taking deep breaths all the while.

As the night dragged on, you occasionally checked on Yugyeom to make sure that he was ok (and maybe see if he was looking at you. During all your “sneaky” glances, you were once again struck by how handsome he was. Even as his brows furrowed in confusion and got ink on his nose, he was so good looking. No one should look as good as he looked while doing school work.

At one point, you had to stifle a small laugh when you saw him reach for some drink he brought with him only to realize that it was empty. The shocked face he made when he realized made you want to swoon and get him another drink as well, but you didn’t want to speak and further break the delicate silence. Apparently Yugyeom must have heard your laugh because he looked up and met your eyes. Both of you simply stared at each other in awkward silence.

Fuck.

“Uh… what were you drinking?” You asked, cringing as each word was spoken.

A sinkhole would be wonderful at this point. You really didn’t want to answer and yet he was simply looking even more confused as the silence festered, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to think of what to say in response.

Fuck.

Without even giving him time to answer, you excused yourself hastily, embarrassment filling you to the brim as you practically ran out of the commons. Now you had another issue to worry about as well… what would be your excuse for leaving?

You were such a dumbass for leaving.

Fuck.

Yugyeom was surely going to answer if you hadn’t left, and now that you suddenly left he probably thought you were rude and most definitely wouldn’t want to be your friend. All your stuff was still in the commons as well and you still had another two hours that you were supposed to be working the commons before your shift was done. It wasn’t like you could just leave and not return for the night.

The only plus you could see was that you had your lanyard with you. At least you could get something at a vending machine or something. It wasn’t the most acceptable reason to walk out of the commons before he could answer but at least it was something.

At that thought, you briskly walked to the closest vending machine, hoping no one who was still working late in the building wouldn’t look at you or try to talk to you. It was just down the hall so it wouldn’t take you too long to get something and return as long as no one talked to you.

Before you punched in a number for one of the foods in the machine though, you found yourself realizing that you had no idea what he liked to eat. As if tonight couldn’t get any more embarrassing. It was like part of you was dying as you stared angrily at the vending machine for help (not like it was sentient and could suddenly shout “This is the food Yugyeom gets every time!”).

In the end, you settled for getting him one of your favorite snacks from the vending machine and praying that Yugyeom had some sense in food. As you slowly walked back to the commons, different scenarios played through your mind depending on how he reacted. It wasn’t until you almost entered that you wondered if he was even still in the commons.

He was, thankfully.

When you entered, you stopped at the door though, suddenly worried about going up to Yugyeom and giving him the snack… It wasn’t a big deal… but what if he was allergic to what you got? Or what if he…

“Are you just going to stand by the door?” His voice cut through your thoughts.

You coughed awkwardly, “No… Sorry for leaving so suddenly earlier… I… uh… I had to pee. Badly. To make it up though…” You shuffled to him and quickly set the snack in front of him, “Here’s a snack. I didn’t know what to get you so I got my favorite.”

He looked shocked, “Thank you! I love this snack! I was drinking a matcha latte by the way. The cafe downstairs makes a really good latte. I’m addicted.”

“They are so amazing.” You laughed and nodded, quickly sitting in your seat again as relief filled you, “I remember having like five a day until I ran out of swipes for it on my card and had to struggle without them for the rest of the semester… which had like two months left.”

Yugyeom snorted and you felt a jolt of excitement at hearing it, “Yeah. One of my friends is that way with their coldbrews. Loves their honey and vanilla one.” He scrunched up his nose cutely, “It doesn’t taste good to me though.”

“You know… if you want really good matcha stuff. There’s a cafe off campus near the town’s library that is all matcha themed. They have some other stuff but almost everything uses matcha in it and it’s amazing.”

“That sounds amazing… I’d love to go sometime… maybe…” Yugyeom stopped and you noticed a deep blush grow on his face, “Maybe we could go together sometime.”

“I’d like that a lot.”

You felt positively giddy as you waited for Yugyeom outside of the union commons the following day, your mind racing as you tried to look calm and collected. Of course, almost every shifter in the room could smell the anxiety wafting off of you as you waited but all of them had the decency to act like you weren’t anxious… well except for Yejin who was another shifter who worked at the union and was probably your closest friend that you also worked with.

As soon as she saw you show up with nothing but a small backpack that only held a few things and smelled your anxiety, she knew right away that you weren’t in the commons to relax. When you told her that you were meeting with a… a friend, she got all excited (even more excited when you confessed that you were here earlier than needed). You weren’t normally someone who was overly worried about time, especially when it came to hanging out, but Yugyeom made you nervous and you wanted to impress.

While Yejin started to complain about you not telling her sooner, you felt thankful that you hadn’t. She was amazing and you loved her, but you knew that if you told her that you were hanging with a guy you had a crush on, she would try to style you up. You didn’t think that this was the type of occasion for that. Besides, Yugyeom probably meant it as a friendship hang out and not a date hangout. Your gay ass never knew how to handle good looking people who wanted to be friends… especially when they were as sweet and good looking as Yugyeom.

You so had a crush on the guy.

Fuck.

“Haha. Looks like we both had the idea of arriving early.” Yugyeom’s laugh broke you from your train of thoughts.

You looked up to see him enter the commons and make a b-line to you, and you were struck with how handsome he was. Not that he wasn’t normally. He always looked good, but he looked amazing in the large blue sweater and skinny jeans. What topped it off was that his hair was swept back in a graceful windblown manner, unlike the past few times where it rested in a simple bowl cut that still managed to make him look amazing.

Like you, there was also a smell of nervousness that radiated off of him, but neither of you mentioned the nervous smells. If anything, his anxiousness made you feel more excited and comforted. Maybe Yugyeom thought of this as something more than two potential friends hanging out… just like you did.

You tried to smile as naturally as possible (although, it probably looked slightly pained), “Yeah! I mean… I had a shift here just before this.”

“Oh.” Yugyeom’s smile faltered slightly and you immediately knew you messed up.

“Not like I wouldn’t have arrived early if I didn’t have a shift,” You laughed awkwardly, the two of you now walking to your car to go to the matcha shop, “Honestly, I am so bad with time, if it wasn’t’ for my shift, I would have probably been here two hours early instead of just thirty minutes early.”

“I thought you just got off of a shift?” Yugyeom smirked and you blushed.

“I… Yeah. I mean… I got off two hours ago, went to get ready, and then I returned… not…”

Yugyeom laughed loudly and shook his head, effectively cutting you off. Before either of you had time to respond, you made it to your car and in a somewhat awkward silence, the two of you got in and drove to the matcha place. The actual time in the cafe was… amazing.

Laughter and amicable conversation filled the whole evening as the two of you tried multiple foods and drinks together. Before you knew it, the sun set and you had to drop Yugyeom off at campus before returning to your apartment for the night, a pile of reading waiting for you to work on the next day. All throughout the next day, you felt as if you were floating on cloud nine, a dazed smile stuck on your face when you thought back on the time at the cafe.

It was only after not seeing Yugyeom around for a few days that you started to feel anxiety pool and bubble in you once again.

Did you do something wrong?

You’d given him your number… he knew where he could find you… why hadn’t you two talked since?

Suddenly, you started to feel jumpy and worried, reliving the moments at the cafe over and over again so see if there was something you possibly did wrong to make Yugyeom not want to associate with you again. Maybe it was because the two if you barely talked about shifters… You weren’t a common shifter and people often had trouble guessing normally but you are now on pheromone blockers as well and that adds a whole extra layer of befuddlement, but what type of shifter you were shouldn’t matter… unless was Yugyeom one of those shifters that didn’t like associating with predators?

No. Surely he couldn’t be that way.

Prey shifters didn’t often use pheromone blockers in the first place… he had to have known that you were some sort of predator… so that couldn’t be it… right?

Surly…

You sighed and shook your head to try to release some of the anxiety you were holding. It wasn’t good for you to hold it all in like this. There was barely any time for you to shift and relax lately and at this point. It would probably give you less stress to just find Yugyeom yourself and ask instead of dwelling on why the man hasn’t messaged you yet. You didn’t need people stress along with the regular school and shifter stress. But damn, you couldn’t stop dwelling on how stupid you were for not asking for his number in return.

Tiredly, you picked at the dinner in front of you, your body feeling the stress building. This wasn’t how you wanted to spend your Friday. You planned to go out later in your racoon form and run around for hours on end, but now that you were thinking more about it, maybe it would be good for you to spend more time in your shifter form this weekend. You didn’t want to return home yet. The apartment was empty and while normally you enjoyed the alone time, you felt the need to be around people today.

Maybe you could put your stuff in the shifter commons and wander around campus… although many humans didn’t enjoy seeing raccoons around so maybe it would be better if you stayed in the shifter commons so that no one got too startled by you. Most people wouldn’t bat an eye at an animal in the commons.

After picking at some more of your food, you put your dishes in a bin for the cafeteria staff and walked off, each step making you more excited for spending some time in your animal form. Inside the shifter commons there were probably a handful of people, some half-shifted and some chilling around in their animal forms.

“Hey Yejin!” You said with a smile as you made your way to Yejin (who was staffing the common today).

“Omg! Y/n! It’s so good to see you here today! I was meaning to ask, do you think you could take my shift Monday? Jisoo asked me out and Monday works best for them.” Yejin was smiling broadly as she spoke.

“Sure. Can you watch over my stuff? I want to shift and while I can still watch over it myself, with you here, I can wander more.”

“It’s a deal!” You responded eagerly, already putting your bag under her desk, your ears excitedly popping out.

Fairly painlessly, you shifted, your clothes falling around you as you grew smaller and smaller. As soon as you fully shifted, you felt relief flood you. In the back of your mind, there was still stress to worry about, but right now, you felt relaxed and relieved. You weazled out of your heap of clothes excitedly and watched as Yejin nudged them under the table with the rest of your stuff before running off to explore the commons. In your human form, the commons were a usual gathering place but as a raccoon, it was a jungle of excitement. Soon enough, you found yourself following your nose which had locked onto some tasty smelling food somewhere in the room. You weren’t likely going to get to eat the food but you’d be damned if you weren’t going to try. The smell led to someone you didn’t expect to see in the commons.

Yugyeom.

He hadn’t noticed you yet though and you had half the mind to turn around and explore elsewhere when someone he was next to pointed at you and started excitedly shouting.

“A trash panda! Omg! I’ve never seen a raccoon shifter before! Omg! This is so cool!” The man kept gushing as he stood up and looked at you closely, his eyes wide.

You got a strong dog wiff coming off of him and his intensity made you freeze. The man must have gotten the hint because the next second he was whimpering and closing his eyes slowly. Part of you wanted to laugh because most shifters still understood what people were saying but another part of you was comforted at how he tried to communicate with you. Slowly you closed your eyes as well before making grabby motions with your hands. You wanted to sniff him more.

He extended one of his hands, clearly understanding what you were saying, and you sniffed him slowly.

“Yugyeom! Come introduce yourself! It’s rude to just stare!” The man said, ushering Yugyeom to join the both of you in the ground.

Yugyeom slowly blinked at you and extended his hand which you happily sniffed, enjoying the comfort that washed over you with his smell. At this point, you were fairly positive that he knew who you were but he didn’t say anything.

“Oh! Would you be willing to at some point tonight, we will be here all night,” The man shot Yugyeom a look at that addition, “Come talk to us in your human form? I’d love to be friends with you!”

“Their name is Y/n, Jackson. We’re… we’re friends.” You relished as blush spread across his face as he spoke and nodded.

“Omg! This is the person that you were telling me--”

“Nope! Don’t continue!”

“That you want to ask on a date?”

Your world stopped and you felt your eyes widen in shock and excitement.

He wanted to ask you out.

You started to jump around and made excited squeaking noises, before you could stop yourself you jumped onto Yugyeom, excitedly scenting his arm.

Jackson started laughing happily, “I guess that means they want to go on a date with you too dude!

#got7writerscollective #wkcnet #got7 #got7 yugyeom #got7 x reader #got7 hybrid au #got7 fluff #got7 college au #yugyeom fluff #yugyeom x reader #yugyeom hybrid au #yugyeom college au #got7 angst #yugyeom angst #w: panic attack #flightlogproject

47 notes · View notes

laurelleghuleh · 3 years

Text

𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 | 𝐃𝐚𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢 𝐒𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐦𝐮𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff, one-shot

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 6.7k

𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐨𝐧: Ao3, Wattpad

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: post-time skip, aged-up characters, implied/referenced sex, sensitive topics(?)

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: This is a kind of “interactive” one-shot. At some point, you’ll find the link for the playlist I’ve created for the story. It’s not mandatory, of course. The songs are mentioned and their lyrics are quoted anyways.

I tried to keep the reader as gender-neutral as possible, I hope it works.

To be honest, I wrote the first half of this one-shot at 3 am after a very deep conversation with a friend of mine about struggling with self-love as “young adults”. It wasn’t meant to be public but I felt like sharing it. I hope this will help or at least cheer you up as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Lastly, italics when Daichi sings/for the lyrics and English is not my first language, sorry for any mistakes!

Thanks for reading this, Laurelle.

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Taxes, laundry, rent, bills, grocery shopping, bank accounts, job interviews. These were just some of the things whose thought alone made you already shiver. Adulthood and the multiple responsibilities that had come with it scared the shit out of you, at times it completely fucked up your sleep schedule, and put your sanity at stake, but at least you weren’t alone in this. At least, you had Daichi.

You two had faced college together, one at each other’s side, and now you were again together in that new chapter of your life called adulthood.

By then, you two had been living in that little, yet cozy apartment for a few months. The Karasuno team had lent you a hand by making the move less hard, unpacking boxes and decorating the empty shelves with an unnecessary amount of frames, random objects, and souvenirs from their trips. All of this as Daichi was training at your hometown’s Police Department and as you were trying to find your place in the world, between part-time jobs and “real” job interviews.

The new routine was dull, draining, at times even overwhelming. The closer you were getting to make your dream life come true, the more your daily life felt like a nightmare. The more you felt tired, unmotivated, ultimately empty. And you couldn't help but wonder if that was really worth it anymore.

You started to slowly give up on your hobbies and passions, to spend your free time on the new couch, just spacing out, and to eventually forget about yourself. You didn’t want to sound too pathetic but life seemed to have lost its flavor. At that point, it just tasted like disinfectants and instant noodles.

Those fucking instant noodles … You thought as you looked at yourself in the mirror that evening. None of your planned outfits for that night fitted anymore, none, and at the sudden realization, that familiar smell of instant noodles rose inside your nostrils. But instant noodles weren’t really the point. Your outfits not fitting anymore wasn’t the point either. That you in that mirror was the point. That stranger. That empty shell.

The familiar boomy sound of keys twisting inside the front door’s lock, a click, and Daichi was finally home.

“I’m baaack” You heard him say - almost yell - and then saw him coming inside the kitchen to greet you.

“May I have a kiss?” He shyly asked, placing his hand on the small of your back, drawing little circles to get your attention.

“Sure,” You turned your head for a quick, soft peck on his lips, then got back to your chore.

“Still in your PJs, babe?” He commented, his voice small, clearly weakened by his long, draining day at work.

By that time, you were supposed to be ready to head out, but something in the process went wrong. On the other side of the city, a nice restaurant - highly suggested by Michimiya sometime before - was waiting for you and Daichi to arrive in twenty minutes.

“Yeah… I have to finish cooking these for tomorrow before we head out…” You murmured as your words fell down to the pot beneath you.

That wasn’t a lie, but in all fairness, you were only trying to avoid the truth. Little did you know you were about to experience what living with a future detective really meant.

Besides his professional deformation, when it came to you, Daichi never failed to sense when something was off. Even just from a slight change of your tone. He was so used to your voice that the most insignificant variation of its sound seemed to conceal a tiny, secret message only for him to decipher.

Anyways, you kept looking down, your mind somewhere else, your eyes still lost in the little fog coming from the pot. You still didn’t dare to look at him, which was rather unusual. Strange. Kind of suspicious.

Daichi rocked his head in your direction, trying to find other tangible clues for that particular case he wasn’t expecting to face once at home. Yet nothing was really out of place, except that gloomy aura all around you. Therefore, he decided to just play it cool for the moment and let you be.

Maybe he was overthinking. Maybe he was just being paranoid. The only thing that really mattered was that night to be perfect for both of you.

It wasn’t a special occasion or else, just Daichi’s first free evening after a whole month of night shifts. And in addition to that, that dinner had been meticulously planned the previous week. Nothing could have ruined it. Nothing.

Yeah, he was just being paranoid, for sure. Nothing to worry about.

Daichi moved away from you and walked towards the front door again. Then, he plugged his phone on the little speaker at the entrance and played the playlist you two loved to blast whenever you were at home, cleaning the house, or just swinging from a room to another.

And that was when everything got even more suspicious in Daichi’s perspective.

The first song came on (“Come Through and Chill” by Miguel, J.Cole, Salaam Remi ), the little bass drums slowly filling the room, vibrating from wall to wall, gradually reaching your feet through that old wooden pavement. And yet, you stayed completely still.

Suspicious .

“Everything ok?” He casually asked you from a distance, putting the phone back down on top of the speaker.

“Yeah, good, good. You?” You mumbled, trying to hide your words under the rhythm.

Even more suspicious .

It wasn’t only your voice, but your posture, your face, just your aura that seemed so… Different. Even though you two hadn’t been living together for long at that point, he could simply tell what looked ordinary and what not. You knew each other and dated since college, which at that point meant years of studying the other up close, not only as partners but firstly - and mainly - as friends. Two best friends always looking out for one another. Those had been years of sincere trust and affection.

Funny thing was that neither of you could imagine that a casual encounter in a cafè would have taken that turn. But Suga knew. And Asahi too. Everybody knew, except you two.

One morning, the vending machine of your department was out of order, and that was just the tenth curveball of that day. It’s not even thirty past eight and I already want to go back to sleep , you sighed, walking outside the campus, looking for a cafè or something.

As fate would have it, the tiny, little-known coffee shop you found right behind the corner was Asahi’s workplace, which brought both Suga and Daichi to have their breakfast there every single morning.

Your first time there, your order was mistaken with Daichi’s, one thing led to another, and after a while, you two started hanging out frequently. Then even more consistently. Then no Asahi or Suga around. No coffee shop. Study sessions at his place. Then at your place. A movie night that actually looked and felt like a proper date. And eventually, that friendship blossomed into something else, something pretty serious.

You didn’t even realize when or how that happened, it just felt right. You two didn’t even have a real “date” for when your relationship had begun. For the sake of simplicity, you both used to count from your first kiss, both aware that whatever you two shared had started even before that, even that morning in that tiny, little-known coffee shop.

That was the type of love that comes easily, without warning, silently tiptoeing into your life.

Back in your apartment, once freed from his jacket, Daichi made again his appearance at your side, now wearing a playful look and about to hit his favorite line of the lyrics. He almost made you startle.

“Hello, stranger… It's been a minute since we last kicked it” He sang and swung around you, positioning himself right behind you to wrap you in a warm hug. Then, gingerly nestling his head in the curve of your neck, he breathed against your skin, “Now that I’m home, I’m all good… ”

Bear hugs were Daichi’s thing and also your not-so-secret Achilles’ heel, for sure. So, you just leaned in his embrace and welcomed his familiar, calming scent. But still, you didn’t have the courage to face him.

Very, very suspicious .

Your oddly detached behaviors made his brow pinch and his mind wander as he left soft pecks all over your jaw and neck. No reaction , Daichi thought, taking mental notes of your actions.

At that point, he gave you one last, gentle kiss, this time on your shoulder, right where the hem of your shirt met your skin, and then silently made a step back. Daichi’s first thought was to temporarily let you be. A quick shower and a change of clothes were very much needed after that long day. He thought he still got time to unravel your mood.

Still focused on the pot, you heard him tell you, before disappearing in your bedroom, “I’ve been thinking about tonight all day, love. I literally can’t wait to try this restaurant!”

You felt a knot in your stomach.

Why was it so hard for you to simply tell him? To simply put into words how you felt? You knew he would have understood, you knew how sensitive Daichi was, especially when it came to you. But to look so needy, so lost in his eyes made you feel just weak. Not vulnerable, not emotional, just a weak person in need. And the last thing you wanted was to look or feel like a burden to Daichi. You knew how stressed and overworked he was. That was a pretty tough period for you both and you felt like you had no right to complain. Daichi never did, and all you wanted was to be as strong as he was.

It didn’t take much for Daichi to be ready, all cleaned up and dressed for the occasion. Nothing too elegant or pretentious, he was a very casual type of guy even when it came to clothes, but that was still your night. A little more effort won’t hurt , he thought as he picked his outfit, preferring a classic, white, button-up shirt to his favorite sweater - his safe choice whenever he didn’t know what to wear.

He just wanted to look good that night, to look good for your eyes only.

Right when “Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee started, Daichi’s unmistakable cologne stood above the food’s thick smell coming from the pot. You immediately turned around.

He looked handsome, as always. The view made your belly twitch again.

“Hey hon, remember that time we went to see Spiderman with Suga, Asahi, and Kyoko?” He started to speak, crossing the room with slow strides in your direction.

“You fell in love with this song on the spot. Oh my god, I think you blasted it in the car at least ten times on our way back...” He said wrapping his arms around your waist again, making you turn and trying to initiate a slow dance with you.

“I know you’re scared of the unknown, you don’t wanna be alone” He sang, “I know I always come and go,” The lyrics hitting way too close to home, “But it’s out of my control”

At that point, he held you tight, roaming his big, callous hands all over your back as he glanced at the pot from above your shoulder.

“That looks delicious, babe. Can’t wait to eat it tomorrow. I just know it tastes as good as it looks…”

There he was again, being all supportive and loving no matter what. So damn cheesy, he could have made someone sick. But not you.

You weren’t much of a chef yourself and you knew it, but you tried your best. And Daichi appreciated it a lot. He was so proud of you, always so blindly proud. He was undoubtedly a better chef than you were, but he still left you space to experiment and try out new things.

You never thought you could enjoy cooking that much, but probably Daichi being a foodie played a role in that. A foodie, well, possibly the biggest foodie you knew. The thought alone of food could make him insane, let’s say slightly irrational like he wasn’t functioning normally.

That was at the beginning when you both had all the time in the world to even plan a food competition and invite all your friends over to eat and vote for your plates. In the beginning, when that apartment’s walls were still white and bare, when the only furniture you owned was an old red couch and several boxes with all your things still packed inside. In the beginning, when there were way fewer things to care about in your daily routine.

“It’s ready, I guess. I should turn off the stove… ” You mumbled against his chest, then turned around still sweetly trapped in his embrace.

“Then you’re left in the dust… mhmhIdon’trememberthewordsmm” He kept singing behind your back, “ You’re the sunflower, I think your love would be too-”

When the little flame disappeared under the pot, a sharp sigh accidentally left your mouth.

“Daichi…” You breathed, squeezing his right hand still gently pressed on your belly.

Daichi .

You rarely called him by his first name. You’d usually go with “love” or “babe” or whatever sweet name came into your mind at that specific moment. Daichi . “Daichi” was something like a safeword, a code for “I’m dead serious right now”, “Your mum is calling” or, like this time, “Something is wrong”.

At that signal, the Karasuno’s former captain knew exactly what to do as if a ball had just flown past an invisible volleyball net right in front of him. That was just the confirmation he needed to make his move.

Living together, making a long-term relationship works, sticking together regardless, all of these for you both were based on the little things you started to learn about one another. Most of the time failing but never giving up on the other person. And this, this was one of those “little things”.

Daichi .

Wordlessly, he went straight to his phone and turned down the music at its lowest, the songs just a light, almost unperceivable background. You turned in his direction, watching him attentively, in silence, until he beckoned you to follow him.

You did as told and walked with him towards the living room, where he guided you to sit on the couch, your right hand gently secured in his.

He sat down on his heels, right in front of you, and waited, waited for you to say something, giving you all the time you needed to process your thoughts.

Minutes passed, the music still softly playing in the background.

Spendin' all my nights alone, waitin' for you to call me

You're the only one I want by my side when I fall asleep

Tell me what I'm waitin' for

I know it's hard but we need each other

(“SUGAR” by BROCKHAMPTON)

When you lifted your gaze to meet his sweet eyes, like two big, dark chocolate nuggets, you still didn’t know what to say. Automatically, his lips parted to catch your attention.

“Love,” His voice so tender it literally broke your heart to keep that facade any longer.

Your lips puckered, your nostrils widened, your eyes got unexpectedly watery until the first of many tears started to run down your face. When your head fell forwards, hiding between your hands, Daichi immediately got you. His arms circled your frame, welcoming you against his chest as you kept weeping noisily.

Daichi stayed silent, his head pressed against your shoulder, moving in sync with each of your sobs.

“Let it out, babe, don’t hold it back.”

At those words, your weeps only seemed to get worse to the point you didn’t know anymore why you were crying in the first place. Maybe you just needed to let it out, to rest, and let yourself get lost in Daichi’s embrace. His warmth felt like home and it was so comforting that after a while you finally cooled down. Nothing was wrong anymore, you were safe and sound.

“When you’re ready, I’m here to listen.” He whispered.

You nodded against his skin, then drew back, revealing your puffed and reddish face. He immediately stood up and walked towards the kitchen. Once back, he kneeled again in front of you and handed you tissues and a glass of water.

“Thanks,” You murmured and then blew your nose.

Daichi just stared at you, his eyes wandering all over your figure as you shrugged and sighed. You opened your mouth only to close it a second later. You didn’t even know where to start. Your bottom lip quivered, you felt like you’re about to cry again.

“What’s going on, love?” His voice small and tender.

You sighed again and gave a quick look to the clock behind him. It was almost time to leave. Actually, at that point, you were already late. Your eyes found his again and a thought occurred to you. He looked so happy until a moment before, singing and dancing, all dressed up, ready to leave and try that restaurant. But now there he was, all worried for you, down on his knees, not caring if that position was messing and creasing his shirt.

“It’s really nothing. Just had a bad day. I should go get-” You tried to stand up, but Daichi’s hands stopped you right there, pinning you down again.

“Are you sure, that’s just it?”

You couldn’t physically bring yourself to lie to Daichi. Not even for the smallest things. Not even for a white lie.

“To be honest, I don’t really feel like going out tonight…”

His eyebrows twitched. First clue unlocked.

“That’s fine. Let me just give them a call-”

“No, no. There’s no need. We should go anyway. It’s really nothing.”

Daichi was never really fond of you being difficult, he’d rather prefer you being straightforward. But sometimes, your pride overtook you. Nevertheless, that was not the right time to point out you were being too stubborn, so he just reassured you, saying,

“Listen, it’s up to you, babe. Your wish is my command, you know that, right?”

Daichi was always so kind. From time to time, you even believed he was way too good for you. Too good, it’s almost unfair , you thought.

“Really, it’s nothing… I’ve been thinking about tonight all day too. I couldn’t wait to finally spend some time with you…”

He giggled, your sweet tone instantly reassured him, “You know we can always stay at home and just watch a movie, right? Just tell me if you don’t feel like going out and I’ll call the restaurant right away.”

“Well, it’s not that… I… I…” You sighed. You really were being too difficult that time. “To be honest, I don’t know what-” Your voice cracked, “I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Daichi leaned closer and kissed your forehead, then stood up and grabbed his phone. From a distance you clearly heard him talk to someone, apologizing and saying something else you didn’t quite catch. The restaurant , you thought. You instantly walked towards him and tried to oppose, but Daichi politely hushed you and just hung up.

“Why did you do that?” You asked him.

“Cause it seems like you can’t decide right now. The restaurant can wait, really, but whatever is going on with you cannot. And now, if you want to tell me more about it I’m here, if not I’ll just let you be, or if-”

You grabbed his hands, stopping him. Your head swung from side to side as you collected your thoughts.

“It’s just that… I don’t know where to start.” You said and plopped yourself down on the couch.

He softly asked you when that started, if you remembered what little event had possibly triggered your current mood, and suddenly the right words found their way out of your mouth.

It had just been one of those everything-goes-wrong kinds of days, no rest, and too many things to do that eventually you found yourself already in front of the closet without even realizing it. Your eyes were drained and unfocused after all those hours in front of your laptop, working, sending emails, and stuff like that. Your stomach was aching and bloating after eating the previous night’s leftovers. Your legs were sore. Your mind was blank, empty, and at the same time also full of imprecise thoughts about work, what you needed to do before heading out, the dinner, the clothes, that mirror right in front of you.

You described to him this confused overwhelming sensation you had been experiencing for the previous months and all along Daichi was carefully listening to you, nodding and humming. From time to time he tried to comfort you, saying that it was quite understandable since you both started a new, complicated chapter of your lives since there were so many things to be settled and done, etc. He even apologized if he had accidentally neglected you in some way. He was so stressed and focused on work, he barely noticed what was going on with you. But you didn’t seem to listen to his words. Every single time you just replied with the same anxious thoughts you had already said before.

At some point, Daichi interrupted you, saying, “Babe, look at me and be honest,” then grabbed your hands and looked straight into your still reddish eyes, “Do you want me to listen … Or do you want some advice ?”

That was a thing Daichi had learned with time, not only from you but also from his experience as a captain. Sometimes people just need to vent, some other times to be taken by the hand and helped, but there are also other times when people may even need both.

You sighed. “Both I guess?”

He hummed and kept listening at other incoherent stuff you mumbled next about yourself, your image, your perception of yourself, “And that damn outfit! I’ve been thinking about it all day! It was my only option and it didn’t work! I looked terrible, I could barely stand my reflection in the mirror… Why do I have to feel so miserable about a damn outfit?! And then I put my PJ back on and I thought I looked like a fucking cartoon! I wanted to hide under a blanket and just disappear… I must sound delusional right now…”

New clues unlocked.

“No, absolutely, you’re not delusional, love. But... Let me ask you this. What is really bothering you? How you look or how you feel ?”

You tilted your head and pondered his question. At that moment you realized you had never thought about it that way before. How I look or how I feel… , you kept thinking for a while.

However, you still weren’t able to unravel that truth, therefore you just kept rumbling about those stupid clothes not fitting you anymore for another solid couple of minutes.

Daichi chuckled.

“That just means you need to do more shopping, babe,” He pointed out and leaned in to pepper your neck with soft kisses. You couldn’t help but giggle as his kisses alternated with random names of your favorite shops where you two could have gone to the next day to buy something. But eventually, you lightly pushed him away, not because you really wanted to but... Something wasn’t still quite right and you didn’t know what it was. That made you feel ultimately uneasy.

Daichi drew back on his heels, his hands still on your sides, sweetly caressing your hips. He stayed there and just contemplated you as your mind spun around and other vague thoughts piled up in your head.

“So, is there something else?” He softly asked.

“I guess so… It’s not about the clothes. I think it’s me. I look so different and I feel so different, I can barely recognize myself.”

“Love, you have so many things to do, I know it’s hard to find time for you to eat clean or be active. Maybe I should propose less pizza and stuff—”

“No, no, babe, it’s not you... I just feel awful about myself.”

“You feel , but you’re definitely not. I guarantee you that.” Daichi immediately comforted you.

“You know the saying, love is blind…” You tried to joke around.

“It sure is. I could love you with my eyes closed, but even with my eyes wide open, I can’t see anything wrong with you.”

Daichi’s love confessions were sappy at their core, but his voice was always so direct and honest they always sounded like facts. And they never failed to catch you off guard. Daichi used to be shy and awkward in the beginning of your relationship. He was constantly blushing hard and messing with his sentences whenever it came to talk to you. However, with time, his affection and ways started to be so sincere and straightforward you didn’t even know how to contradict him or how to even say anything back.

“I wish you could see yourself through my eyes…” His tone suddenly painted with melancholy, “Then you could see how beautiful you are, how precious, how…” He felt it too. He felt he was getting too emotional, so he tried to take the edge off, coming back to his goofy side. “No, no. Rewind. You might end up dumping me. Nah nah, not gonna happen!” He muffled, hiding his head against your belly, curling up with his torso over your lap.

You couldn’t help but laugh. You loved him so much.

“Jokes aside,” He said, lifting his head and looking up at you. “Tell me, babe, is this really such a big deal? Because if it bothers you to this point, you should think about it more carefully... Can I help you in some way?”

“Honestly, I-I don’t know how you could help me,” You confessed, “I feel like I’m not taking care of myself, but I also lack motivation to actually do something about it. It’s a dog chasing its own tail, you know what I mean?”

“Yeah, I get it… Well, I could encourage you, first. But then I could also help you and try to do things with you, like…” He thought about it for a couple of seconds. “What if I call Tanaka? He's a personal trainer but he also knows a lot about nutrition. He may suggest something delicious but fast and healthy for us to cook. It could be beneficial for both of us. We have been literally eating our stress away recently. You know what, I feel bloated too…” Daichi added and then proceeded to touch his tummy.

You lightly pushed him again and started to shower him with compliments. You couldn’t wrap your mind around the fact that Daichi could ever possibly be insecure about himself. He was… Daichi. He was just perfect.

He smirked at your reaction and got closer to shut your mouth with a sudden, deep kiss.

“Can I tell you a secret?” He whispered, just an inch away from your lips.

“Sure, what is it?” You said almost laughing. A secret?

“Ok, look at my pants,” Daichi said, drawing back until he stood up, right in front of you.

“Yeah, I’m looking at them and they look really good on you-” You started to say and tried to make him spin around to point out how good he looked in those dark pants. That was actually your favorite pair, you loved the way they highlighted his muscular legs, how- But he stopped you right there.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ok, thanks, but have you noticed that I’m not wearing any belt? And actually haven’t worn one in a while?”

You frowned. Where is he getting at?

“And you know why? I don’t really need one anymore. These pants stay up regardless,” Daichi confessed, giggling, “What I mean is… Look, you still like how they fit me. I still like how they fit me. I just know that you would like them even in another size. I would like them as well.”

You just stared at him, quietly pondering his words.

“Anyways, the pants are not the real point. These are just pants. Those things that didn’t fit you aren’t the real point either. You see what I’m trying to tell you?”

You did. You got what he meant, but you were still doubting yourself somehow. Because, in your mind, not fitting your old clothes was just the result of something that slipped out of your hands as you struggled to take care of anything else, except yourself. It wasn’t about your weight or the clothes, it was about losing track of yourself in the process.

“You think I’m perfect while I may, well, I am certainly not. Same goes for you. None of us is perfect, never been, never will. We are just us,” He got closer and sweetly brushed your hair behind your ears, “But for me, in my eyes, you are. And apparently, I’m too in yours. And that’s all that matters.”

Again, just straight facts.

Also, whenever he gave you one of his motivational speeches, he really looked like a captain. You could vividly picture the scene in your head, his teammates carefully listening to him, hanging off his words, right before an important match or even just a regular training session.

“I know it’s extremely cheesy to hear, but it’s also the truth. You’re perfect just the way you are and you’ll always be to me…” His voice small as he kneeled again in front of you. “Even now. Even if you feel lost. The you you’re looking for is still there, it’s not going anywhere. You just need some time and patience to find yourself again.”

You immediately cupped his face, about to tell him something, but before you could spell a single word, he whispered,

“But… But if this is a problem, something you want to change or improve, something you need some help with, then let’s do it, let’s do it together. No. Better. Let’s do it right now!”

Daichi immediately stood up and ran back to the kitchen, where you used to keep your little notebook. Once back, armed with a pen and unmovable willpower, he sat down again and opened the agenda on your lap. Going through your schedule, he noticed how packed it was, pages and pages filled with appointments and notes, but that didn’t scare him.

“Mmm… So, here’s the plan. Our lunch breaks on Monday and Friday look pretty long. We could… Meet at the park. You know, the one right after the supermarket, down the street-”

You nodded, showing him you were following him.

“We could jog a little and then eat something together! That way we’d see each other, have some fun and do something good for our health too… I know jogging doesn’t actually sound much fun, but I swear we’ll have a good time, babe. What do you think?”

Your lips curled upwards into a soft, little half-moon. You couldn’t say no to that.

“Sounds like a plan…” You simply commented.

He looked relieved and then added, “Also, remember that lunch at my mum’s next Sunday? Why don’t we just skip it and go somewhere fancy, like a spa-”

“But we promised-” You tried to object.

“Babe, I know, I know, but we can go some other time. She’ll understand.”

“Okay…”

“It’ll be beneficial for both of us, for real. To be honest, I think I’m this close to a breakdown too,” He laughed.

“You’re right, we should definitely go… You know, I was also thinking about joining some sort of club. I feel like I don't have a hobby or a passion anymore. It’s always work, work, work, the apartment, work, work, work. I feel so… Arid? Mentally. You know what I mean?”

“Yeah… Me too, I was thinking the same exact thing this morning actually… Maybe I should join a volleyball team again. Nothing serious but like a team to play with, just once in a while-”

Your eyes widened, “Oh God! Yes! Absolutely! You should definitely do that, love!”

Daichi nervously chuckled. He wasn’t expecting such an enthusiastic and energetic reaction from you, not after having seen you so blue and distant since he had come back home.

You loved seeing him playing volleyball. You still remembered vividly the times you used to sneak a peek at his practice and matches during college. The first time you saw him playing, all sweat and absorbed in the game, you did a double-take. He looked so hot.

“Alrighty, I’ll definitely think about it… Don’t worry, love, we’ll figure something out.”

“As we always did…” You added, shyly smiling at him.

That situation made you wonder. Life could be hard at times, but if you had the right people around you to rely on, to fight with, or simply talk to, it didn’t seem like that tough anymore.

“Yeah…” He smiled back and instinctively leaned forward to hug you tightly as you welcomed his frame against your chest.

After a few silent minutes, you muffled against his shoulder, “Thank you… I don’t even know how to tell you how thankful I am right now… ”

And in all fairness, there wasn’t much else to add.

“You could start by being less hard on yourself, love,” Daichi said, still pressed against you, “You’re doing so great…”

“You’re way too good to me.” You murmured back, your voice slightly above a whisper.

At your words, he brushed his head from side to side against your shoulder, silently disagreeing with your affirmation. He was just as good to you as you deserved.

Right at that moment, “Best Part” by Daniel Caesar and H.E.R. came on and Daichi thought that there couldn't have been a better time than that for that specific song to start.

He drew back from your hug and guided you to stand up with him, then walked backward to reach the center of the living room, his eyes still fixed on you.

“Siri, turn up the volume!” He ordered his phone to do as he took you in his arms.

You simply stared at him and followed his actions, like a puppet under his spell. His arms welcomed your figure and your fingers locked, your two bodies perfectly molded one against the other as you slow-danced to the rhythm, allowing yourself to utterly enjoy that moment.

A strange feeling warmed your belly, like an overwhelming wave of happiness was overtaking all your senses. Your mouth instinctively opened to shower Daichi with random compliments, words of gratitude, and all sorts of sweet nothings. He loved to be praised by you but after a while he tried to playfully hush you, holding you even tighter and whispered next to your ear a line of that song that seemed to be written right for you. Better, right for him to sing it for you.

“I just wanna see how beautiful you are, you know that I see it, I know you're a star. Where you go I follow, no matter how far. If life is a movie, oh you're the best part…”

The music eventually faded and an hour later you and Daichi were once again in your bed, curled up in your sheets, as you leafed through Netflix’s catalog, fruitlessly. In the end, you just end up cuddling and ultimately dozing off. Nothing special had happened that night, but you felt so restored, at peace, as if everything was completely fine again.

When you woke up the morning after, Daichi was already gone. You were used to this too. No night shifts meant early shifts. But this also had its perks, like the tiny heart-shaped post-it notes he liked to leave in the bathroom for you to read them as you washed your face or brushed your teeth. The breakfast? Ready on the kitchen counter, another post-it note on top of it. And then another one, on the front door, “I can’t wait to see you at lunch <3”

At noon, you two met up at the park as planned. A little warm-up under Daichi’s careful instructions and then you were ready to start. Just a casual jog, nothing too demanding, as you enjoyed the fresh air and the good company of that day.

During the whole run, Daichi kept encouraging you like a real captain and a loyal partner would do, saying that you were doing great, that you looked very good in those leggings, that you were half done at that point, and then that you could do it, you were almost at the end at that point.

“The last lap, babe! We’re almost done!” Daichi shouted, turned his head in your direction, and gave you a wide, shining smile.

“I-I think I’m done for today…” You panted as you struggled to keep up with his pace.

“Six more minutes and we’re done! C’mon! Don’t give up!” He incited but you soon waved the white flag, signaling him your surrender.

Daichi halted and got closer to you. A strange, gloomy aura suddenly spread all around him. A mischievous grin appeared on his face right when he whispered, an inch away from your sweaty face,

“Quitters don’t get their prize, you know that?”

Your breath almost failed you, when you told him, “Yeah, yeah, you can eat my lunch, I don’t want it anymore…”

But apparently, Daichi had another prize in his mind, another type of meal .

“Mmmh, that’s not the reward I was planning to give you…” His voice sounded dangerously seductive for the location you two were at the moment. Your eyes widened at the sudden realization.

His hands slowly roamed from your hands to your shoulders, then cupped your cheeks. His tone got back to normal when he playfully squeezed your face and said, “Six minutes!”

Six minutes passed and the jog was finally over. A little picnic at the park, a quick shower together at home, and then you were good to go. Your afternoon’s tasks awaited you.

That evening Tanaka and Kyoko joined you for dinner. They were both more than happy to give you some advice, to recommend easy and healthy recipes, and to see how the apartment had changed since their last visit.

Later that night, you and Daichi were again in your bed, tired but definitely satisfied. Your back was pressed against his broad chest, your body secured in his warm embrace, your thoughts were quiet, both your body and mind at peace.

You had worked, you had jogged, you had had some fun with Daichi at the park, you had also found some time to finish that book you had forgotten on your desk. Well, actually, Daichi had been texting you during the whole afternoon to remind you to take some breaks from time to time, to have a snack or read something. The dinner with Tanaka and Kyoko had cheered you up more than planned and that full, yet satisfying day was finally over.

You were still lost in your thoughts when you felt Daichi snuggle up, holding you even tighter than before. His left arm was wrapped around your figure while the right one was on top of yours, his fingers gently rubbing your hand, then your wrist and forearm, drawing imaginary patterns all over your skin. As he got closer, ultimately closing that tiny gap between you two, his head found the crook of your neck and gently nestled in it. Then he asked you, his voice hoarse with weariness,

“So? About the jog, did you like it?”

“Weeeell, let’s say that I liked it but mainly because we did it together.” You confessed, “Would I do it alone? I don’t know… Maybe?”

“Fair enough,” He replied and placed a sloppy kiss on your shoulder, his fingers still loosely tracing your arm. Then there was silence, the room was from time to time filled only with the muffled sound of those soft pecks he kept on leaving on your skin.

“You know,” Daichi whispered at some point, between a kiss and another, “Jogging is not the only option…” He paused to clear his throat, “There are other types of activities that we could do…” Another kiss, his breath warm against your neck, his tone husky with desire when he added, “That we could do indoor…”

#daichi x you #daichi x reader #daichi headcanon #daichi sawamura #daddy daichi #haikyuu oneshot #one shot #read on ao3 #read on wattpad #spotify #i wrote this at 3am #sawamura daichi x reader #sawamura daichi #fluff

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bittywitches · 4 years

Text

All Yours (Grayson Dolan Fanfic)

A/N: I’m so sorry I can’t really tell what this is anymore I just. Needed to finish it. This is absolutely way too long and prolly bad but here you go :)

Basically it’s just Grayson getting super duper jealous and paranoid of how close his girlfriend and Ethan are

Hope everyone’s doing well. Love you guys <3

Word Count: 4.6K

“E you’re literally kidding me right now.”

“Bro it’s literally true you’ve been here the entire time you have EVIDENCE!”

“OH MY GOD ETHAN your life was not going to shit because of mercury being in retrograde! That makes no fucking sense!”

“HOW can you say that-“

“Do you know what retrograde even IS?”

“Y/N y-“

“Shut the fuck up im trying to educate you. ‘Mercury being in rEtRoGrAdE’ is just us seeing mercury’s orbit from EARTH-“

“Dude-“

“LISTEN YOU DUMBASS it’s SCIENCE we’re just OBSERVING another orbit while we are ALSO orbiting around the SAME THING-“

“BRO I-“

“Grayson tell him he’s a fucking idiot!”

“HOE he’s literally the one who found the store to buy us those stones!”

She whipped her head around in shock with a slight undertone of disgust. “GRAYSON!”

Grayson looked up from his phone. “Do not drag me into this.”

“Grayson you fucking dUMBASS-“

“Baby-“

“PLEASE tell me it was a joke. You were just committing to the joke.”

He went back to his phone.

“GRAYSON PLEASE-“

“Y/N THERE’S NO OTHER EXPLANATION FOR HOW SHITTY THIS WEEK HAS BEEN-“ Ethan exclaimed.

“Oh I’m gonna-“ she jumped off the couch and lunged towards him, ready to pounce, but Grayson grabbed her waist to hold her back.

“Honey you have got to chill.”

“It is not my fault that Ethan can’t understand BASIC TENTH GRADE SCIENCE-“

“JOKE’S ON YOU I NEVER WENT TO TENTH GRADE-“

“You FUCKER-“

“BABE CALM THE FUCK DOWN!” He yanked her back, and she fell back on top of his chest.

“Can’t you open your mind for one second Y/N-“

“E stop instigating her!” He said, trying to keep a growling Y/N locked in his arms.

“It’s a COINCIDENCE! It’s a scientific phenomenon that happens with lots of satellites in space but has no relation to Earth or us whatsoever and has NOTHING TO DO with your SHITTY WEEK ETHAN! You are just incredibly unlucky!”

“Okay babe you’re actually scaring me maybe turn the rage down a bit?” Gray asked, trying for a soothing tone.

“And you on the other hand! Are you stupid? Are you literally stupid Grayson-“

“BABY-“

She bent down and bit on his arm and he yelped , letting go more out of surprise than in pain.

“Y/N WHAT THE FUCK?” He rubbed his arm and pouted at her.

“Everyone who lives here is a FUCKING IDIOT!” She yelled, storming out of living room and into the kitchen.

A few seconds pass.

...

“You’re not really mad though, right?” Ethan said quietly after clearing his throat.

Y/N walked back into the living room, now holding a bag of potato chips. “Nah, I’m just bored and wanted to argue.”

She plopped herself onto the couch next to Ethan and smiled at him, and he rolled his eyes, but it got a laugh out of Grayson.

“So we cool?” Ethan eyed her warily.

“Of course,” she laughed, then pecked him on the cheek. “I just thrive on dysfunction.” She popped a chip into her mouth.

“Yea she’s right about that..” Gray mumbled from his seat, still staring at his phone.

“Shut up, asshole.”

“Bitchass.”

She laughed. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

“So you do think our shitty week was because of mercury being in retrograde.”

Her laughter stopped when she turned around to look at Ethan. She blinked. “You’re kidding, right?”

“What? You just said-“

“Yea because I thought you were joking-“

“What? I wasn’t-“

“Oh my god don’t get me started-“

“LETS JUST WATCH THE MOVIE!” Grayson shouted, throwing his phone onto the counter.

Y/N snorted. “Jeez, Gray, it’s like you want us to stop fighting.”

“Yea, no doubt this is definitely turning you on right now.” Ethan wiggled his eyebrows, and Y/N spat from laughing so hard as she doubled over.

“EW what the F-” Gray screamed.

“It’s okay, you can be honest with us. It’s not your fault you’re into weird shit.” Y/N howled from laughter.

Grayson rolled his eyes. “Of course you two only stop fighting if it’s to make fun of me. I see how it is-“

“Bubba stop wallowing and start the movie!” Y/N threw a pillow at him, and it landed smack in his face.

“Nice shot.” Ethan remarked.

“Thank you, good sir.” She gave him a high five.

“God, this is one of those times I wish you guys weren’t friends first.” Grayson groaned, grabbing the remote and turning the TV on.

“Hey man, the one time I make a friend on my own and she ends up being your girlfriend. Sounds like a pretty good deal to me, dude-“

“Don’t start with this shit again, E-“

“I mean I basically got you your girlfriend, you technically owe me bro-“

“Shut the fuck up E!”

“Excuse me,” Y/N interjected, shoving Ethan’s shoulder. “You didn’t do shit, okay? I honestly probably just got unlucky and ended up meeting you first instead of Grayson.” She smirked.

“Wow, okay, first of all, fuck you-“

“I'M PUTTING THE MOVIE ON!” Grayson shouted.

“Damn, baby, what’s got you in a bad mood today?” Y/N giggled, and Ethan snickered along with her. They constantly got into tiny fights about nothing just for fun, and it was what made their friendship so interesting. But they knew when to stop fooling around, and it seemed like now was one of those times.

Gray sighed. “Nothinggg, I’m just tired.” It wasn’t nothing, but he was tired. He kicked his feet up into the sofa and leaned back against the pillow. Ethan has already draped the big fuzzy blanket over him and Y/N.

“Baby..” Grayson whined. “Come over here. I wanna cuddle.”

“But it’s so faaar..” Y/N groaned. “And I’m already so cozy.” She smiled at him sweetly.

Grayson couldn’t help but feel warm and fuzzy from the look she gave him, but he was still disappointed. He slumped his shoulders and turned back towards the screen. “Whatever..”

“Aww, Baby, don’t be like that, then you’ll make me feel bad.”

“Jesus you guys are adorably disgusting.” Ethan cringed at you both, and Grayson groaned.

“Why, thank you, kind sir.” Y/N said, grabbing the blanket away from Ethan then scurrying over to Graysons sofa, making his eyes light up.

“Hey! I was using that.” Ethan grumbled.

“Sorry, it’s needed for cuddles which is more important than your lonely ass.”

“Why are you so mean to me?”

“Because you always forgive me right afterwards.” She gave him a cheeky grin, and he scoffed at her.

She turned to Grayson. “Okay, scooch over, you attention whore.”

“Hey-“

“I looove you.”

Grayson rolled his eyes. “You’re lucky I love you too.” He shimmied over, letting Y/N crawl over him so she could nestle up close into his chest. Grayson then threw the blanket over both of them. She laid her head in the crook of his neck, and pressed a kiss there.

“You’re not mad, right?”

He looked down at her, wary. A little, he thought. “No.. why?”

“Dunno..” she shrugged. “Just feels like you are.”

“Well, I’m not.” He said, not with much enthusiasm. He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

“Would you two stop whispering and start the movie already?” Ethan said, putting his feet up onto the counter.

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” Gray reaches for the remote, and started the movie.

...

“There’s no way!”

Grayson groaned, finally waking up to the sound of chattering voices and giggling.

“He’d never do that.” He heard Y/N’s voice say.

He grumbled, rubbing his eyes, but then noticed that he couldn’t feel the weight of Y/N on top of him. He cracked his eyes open and found her missing from his arms. He then turned to find her sitting back over on the couch, next to Ethan.

“You don’t give him enough credit.” Ethan said, grinning.

“I’m not saying I blame him! It makes sense that he wouldn’t.”

He couldn’t explain it, but Grayson felt some sort of anger bubbling in his chest. Why did it seem like every moment he got with Y/N was being stolen? Was he no longer able to just fall asleep with his girlfriend in his arms? Did Ethan always have to be the one he saw instead?

“What’re you two girls giggling about?” He growled, throwing the blanket off of him as he sat up.

“Look who finally decided to wake up.” Y/N said, turning away from E to face him.

Grayson sighed. He couldn’t beat around the bush anymore, so he asked the obvious question. “Whatre you doing over there, baby?”

“Well, you fell asleep halfway through the movie. And you just looked so cute... I didn’t wanna wake you up.” She smiled at him, that familiar twinkle in her eye.

Gray tilted his head at her, unsure what to make of it. How did she always end up doing something sweet so he couldn’t stay mad at her?

“What are you guys talking about?” He asked again.

“Y/N was just telling me about this sex position you won’t try.” He snorted.

Grayson closed his eyes. “Please, dear god, tell me he’s joking.” He opened them again and looked at her.

She laughed, getting up and seating herself down next to him. “He’s joking, bub.” She gave him a side glance. “We were actually just talking about whether or not you’d give up your work for me.”

Grayson blinked, then turned to Ethan. “Are you trying to make me lose my girlfriend?”

He laughed. “No, we were just talking about the podcast and stuff, and she said how she’s never seen you as happy as you are doing that kind of stuff with anything else. To which I said, you’d give it all up in a second for her.”

“Okay I’m not confirming or denying anything-“ Grayson pressed a hand to Y/N’s cheek, “-I love you,-“ he added, getting a smile from her, “but I don’t feel like you’re in a position where you can make that kind of comment while I am unconscious and unable to defend myself.” He directed back at Ethan.

“Baby, relax.” Y/N took his hand from her cheek and pressed a kiss against his palm. “We were just talking. I just said that there’s no way you’d just give up on all of this. On everything. And that makes SENSE.” She said to Ethan. “No relationship should demand that you give up anything that important to you.”

“Right but I’m just saying-“

“Ethan maybe just shut up.” Gray interjected. “Just a little. Just shut up.”

Y/N laughed again. She cupped Grayson’s cheeks, turning his face towards hers, and pressed a quick kiss against his lips. “Sorry, Baby. Didn’t mean to make you all flustered right after you woke up.” She giggled.

Grayson sighed, but smiled. “Sometimes I wonder if you’re worth all this embarrassment.”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yea, you’re right. I don’t.” He grinned.

“Okay, it’s getting too cute again. I’m going to bed before I puke.” Ethan got up, making a gagging gesture with his finger. “Gnight.”

“Night, E.” Y/N said, laughing as he walked out of the room.

“God, I thought he’d never leave.” Grayson pulled Y/N into his arms and kissed her face all over.

She giggled, pushing his face away. “What are you talking about? You literally just woke up.”

“And I was expecting to wake up to my girlfriends pretty face, not his nasty one.” He snuggled his nose into her cheek as she rolled her eyes.

“What’re you talking about.”

“I’m just saying that I don’t mind it when he’s not here to steal you away.”

“Steal me?” She finally got his face off of her and she looked at him, crossing her arms. “the hell is that supposed to mean?”

He gave her a mixture of a sigh and a laugh. “Nothing, babe.”

“Grayson.”

“Yes, Baby.” He pushed her hair back behind her shoulders.

She swatted his hands away. “What is that supposed to mean?”

He shrugged. “I’m just saying that when I fall asleep with my girlfriend in my arms, it isn’t the best feeling waking up to see her giggling with my brother.”

She sat up abruptly, almost knocking him in the face in the process. “What?”

“Nothingggg, never mind.”

“Grayson-“

“I love you,” he said.

“Ok we can’t keep saying that to avoid stuff!” She jabbed at him.

“I’m not avoiding anything, baby girl.” He wrapped his arms around her and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Y/N hesitated. “Bub...”

“Mmm.” He bent down and pressed a kiss to her lips. She held him there, as if she was testing him for something. But she couldn’t seem to figure out what.

They broke apart, and Grayson sighed against her lips.

“I hate that E had to meet you first.”

“Why?” She pulled away just enough to see his eyes.

“Because-“ he stopped, and breathed out. “Because I didn’t get to have you for as long as I could have.” He decided to say that instead, while pressing his forehead against hers.

“You have me now.” She said.

He smiled. “Yea...” he pulled back from her, a wistful sort of look in his eye.

Do I, though? He thought.

Grayson shook his head, then laid back on the couch, putting his arms back behind his head as he breathed out. He felt Y/N weigh down on his chest, propping herself up on her elbows as she looked down at him. She stayed like that for a while, watching him breathe and stare at the ceiling. He wanted to know what was running through her head, but he kept his eyes closed, knowing that if he did look at her he’d feel jealous all over again.

He hated the very idea of him being jealous in the first place. It was icky and weird, and quite frankly disgusting. What was he supposed to be jealous of?

Ethan.

He pushed that thought way, just thinking about it making him queasy. What the fuck was he thinking? How could he be jealous of Ethan when Y/N was his girlfriend? Sure, they were friends first, and yes that pissed him off to no end, but that’s all it was. They were just friends.

Right?

No.

Grayson brought his hands up to his eyes, somehow trying to rub the thoughts out of his head. He let out a loud sigh.

Why did she have to be like this? It’s not like he had a problem with her being close with Ethan. He loved that, and he always wanted his partner to have a good relationship with his brother. Ethan was super important to him, and he wanted both his love and his brother to be in his life. And that’s what he got, so he should be lucky right? He should be happy at the thought that the three of them could just hang out and things wouldn’t be weird.

Yes it would.

No it wouldn’t.

They spend too much time together.

No they don’t.

She probably wants to be with him instea-

“Woah- okay.” Grayson mumbled, opening his eyes fast to pull himself out of his spiral. That went too far way too fast. He peered up at the ceiling, trying to concentrate on the blank white colour and clear his thoughts.

He felt Y/N shift on his chest, probably in response to his small outburst, and he prayed that she wouldn’t say anything. He waited a second.

Two.

Three.

She didn’t make a sound, aside from her soft breath. He relaxed.

This is Y/N. his girlfriend. The girl he loved, and the girl he was quite sure loved him the same way. Nobody else. Just him.

You sure?

“Fuck!”

“Baby, are you okay?” She finally said now, pushing herself up off of his chest gently to look at him with furrowed eyebrows.

“Yea, princess. I’m fine. Just.. a headache.”

She titled her head at him, a worried look in her eye. “You sure?”

You sure?

“YES!” He said a little too loudly, making her jump a little. “Yes, I’m sure.”

She peered at him with a look of unease, but she dropped it. He seemed tired, and she didn’t want to push him. However, she could tell there was something running through his mind, and it was bothering him.

His face looked pale for the first time, and it freaked her out. His eyebrows were all furrowed, and he just felt dark and unsettling.

“What’re you thinking about, bub?” She finally said, unable to keep wondering.

Grayson coughed. What was he to say?

“...You.” He finally decided with, trying for a playful smile, but his eyes still seemed tired. Uneasy.

“Is that so?” She laid down, bringing her arms down flat on his chest and resting her chin above them. “What about me?”

“Just you.” He brought a hand up to brush a hair out of her face, and this time she let him. “Your pretty face.”

Just for me.

“Right.”

“And your sparkling eyes.”

For no one else.

“Mhm.”

“And your stupid little smile that literally makes me want to squeal like a little school girl.” He said now, a little frustrated, but making him realize once more that this was still Y/N. the girl he had fallen for, and loved with everything he had.

“Aw, I make you squeal like a little girl?”

“Constantly.”

“That may be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.”

“Shut up.”

They both breathed out, their anxious sighs mingling with one another.

Grayson felt Y/N drag her finger across his chest, stopping abruptly right before touching his hand.

She knows.

Knows what?

Knows that you don’t trust her.

He took her hand in his, grabbing it tightly and pressing it against his chest.

I do trust you.

I do.

It was like he could feel her smiling against his chest, and suddenly he relaxed once more. He rubbed her palm with his thumb, glad he could find something to focus on. It was as if she felt the same way, because he felt her place her head down against his chest. He closed his eyes once more, lining his breath up with her soft breath. His other hand found its way to her lower back, now gently rubbing up and down, the way he did whenever she couldn’t fall asleep.

Just fall asleep.

...

“Shit.”

Grayson stirred from his sleep, awoken by the sound of Y/N’s quiet voice.

“Mmmbaby, s’that y-?” He went to sleepily grab Y/N’s waist, but sort of shook himself awake when his arms landed flat against his waist.

He wanted to yell. “God, again with this shit?” He grumbled, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to wake you.” Her voice made him pull his arms away, letting his eyes adjust to the darkness. He finally recognized his girlfriend’s shape standing next to the sofa. He then saw the spilled water at her feet.

“What are you...” he glanced back up at her, and she ran a hand through her hair.

“I got thirsty. Didn’t wanna wake you...” She sighed. “But I couldn’t see in the dark, and I knocked into the stupid coffee table and spilled it all.” She rubbed her eye with the back of her palm and pouted.

Grayson reached for his phone, picking it up and squinting as the bright light shone in his face.

It was 2am.

He turned the flashlight on his phone on so he could see where the water had spilled. Thankfully, none had gotten on the carpet. He placed the phone down and sighed. “My clumsy baby.” He got up off the couch and carefully walked over to her, stepping over the puddle of water. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and kissed her on the forehead. “Okay, I’ll get the mop. Go to bed.”

She smiled. “Love you.”

...

About fifteen minutes later, Grayson quietly shut the door to his bedroom, and saw his girlfriend sitting up in his bed, her head laying against the backboard, and a pretty light shining over her face from the table lamp. Her eyes seemed a little glazed, as if she was about to drift off, but smiled and sat up when she saw him enter the room.

“Why aren’t you sleeping?” Grayson asked, getting into bed next to her.

She shrugged. “Didn’t wanna fall asleep without you.”

She laid her head on his shoulder, and sighed. “I know we kinda say it all the time, so it’s kinda almost lost meaning at this point, but…” she tilted her head to look up at him. “I really do love you.”

Her hand rustled under the blanket to find his, and their fingers intertwined. “A lot.”

Grayson’s eyebrows furrowed. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Nothin’.” She said, reaching up to kiss his cheek.

“Well, whatever it is, I like it.”

Grayson pushed her back down onto her pillow and kissed her while she giggled against his lips.

She pushed him back by his shoulders, giving him a funny look. “I’m just trying to show my appreciation for you.”

“So am I.” He pressed a kiss to her lips again, and this time she didn’t stop him, her hands finding their usual place at his jaw and neck.

When they pulled apart, she kept his head in place, pressing their noses together. “You’re amazing.”

“You’re weird when you’re tired.”

She pecked his lips. “It’s strange that you use the word ‘weird’ instead of ‘affectionate’.”

She let go of him, letting her arms fall on top of the blanket. She stretched, and let out a yawn. She pushed him down onto the mattress, and laid her head in the crook of his neck, her arm against his chest.

Grayson leaned back, just watching the view in front of him. His wonderful girlfriend, falling asleep next to him, in his bed. Hearing her breathing as she drifted off to sleep, her chest slowly rising and falling as she began to dream. It was everything he wanted.

Then why was there that nagging voice still in the back of his head?

This isn’t real.

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

She’s faking it.

What?

All of it.

What is wrong with you?

She’s pretending.

No she’s not.

She is.

She’s not.

She is.

She loves me!

You sure?

…

I have to be sure.

“Y/N…”

“Mmm?”

“Tell me the story of how you met Ethan.”

She looked up at him with a weird look. “Why?”

“Just ‘cause.”

“..babe?”

“I just wanna hear it.”

“But you already know that story.”

“I know..” He stroked her hair. “I just wanna hear it again.”

“Baby what is going on with you?” She pushed herself up off of his chest to look at him, sitting up now.

“Okay, fine. Just tell me what you really thought when you saw him for the first time.”

“What?”

“Were you really just trying to be friends with him?”

“Bub-”

“Or did you want something else?”

“Grayson!” she shoved at his chest. “What is wrong with you?”

“Baby please.” He grabbed her arm. “Did you want him, ever?”

She flung his arm off of her. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Just tell me!” He yelled, impatient and worried.

She blinked at him in astonishment. “Okay, so what if I did, huh?”

His heart sank. “Don’t play games with me, Y/N.”

“So WHAT if I DID, GRAYSON?” she was shouting now too, no longer caring about keeping her voice down so not to wake Ethan.

“Don’t fucking say that.”

“Why would that even matter? I’m not with him, am I? I’m with YOU!”

“Y/N-”

“Grayson, please....” She put her face in her hands. Rubbing her eyes with her palms. “What is wrong? Do you have a problem with me?”

“What? No! I-”

“Then why are you doing this? Why are you acting like a jealous freak? Do you not trust me? Do you not believe me when I pour my heart out to you? When I say that I love you?”

“I’m not jealous-”

“Yes you are!” She threw her hands up in the air. “I’ve never said anything about it, because I didn’t want to. It’s weird, Gray. And especially today! What do you have to be jealous of? Do you not want me to be friends with Ethan? Is that it?”

“No…” His fingers raked through his hair. “No.”

“Then what, Gray? What is it that you want from me?”

She paused.

“Do you not want me?”

His eyes widened. “What the fuck are you talking about?” He wrapped his arms around her aggressively, burying his nose into her shoulder. “You are all I’ve ever wanted.”

She sighed. “Bub…” she gently pushed herself away from his so she could look him in the eye. “No. I’ve never had feelings for Ethan. He’s my friend. My really, good friend that I care a lot about. But I don’t feel anything towards him like what I feel towards you.”

He gave her an exasperated sigh. “Then what did you really think of Ethan the first time you met him?”

“Nothing out of the ordinary! I just thought he was a nice person that I’d like to hang out with.”

Grayson gave her a weary look.

“Babe, I don’t understand. You say that you trust me, but if you did why would you act like this?”

“I don’t know, Y/N! It’s not like I want to! It’s just- you guys are so close. And I’ve just never seen Ethan be that close to someone other than me, and, I don’t know, okay? It just. It just freaks me out.”

Y/N cupped his jaw. “Grayson.”

“Yea?”

“You know what I thought the first time I met you?”

“...what?”

“Wow. I didn’t know it was possible for someone to have a twin significantly more attractive than they are.”

Grayson blinked, but then almost spit all over her, doubling over in laughter, completely forgetting about the seriousness of the situation. Y/N couldn’t help but giggle as well, glad to see him smile.

“Shut up.” He said after controlling his laughing. “Don’t lie.”

“I’m dead serious.” She chuckled. “My hands were all sweaty the entire time, and you know how I kept completely falling off the track while we were playing mario kart?

“Mhm?”

“That’s cuz I was staring at your reflection in the tv screen.”

“Shut UP!”

“I swear to god I’m serious!” she laughed. “And after I gave up to let you guys play and I was just on my phone, I was actually imagining us making out.”

He grabbed her face and kissed her, surprising her, but she relaxed in his arms. When he pulled away, he said: “You are so good at lying to make me feel better.”

“I’m not lying!”

“Mhm.” He kissed her again, wrapping one arm around her waist while the other held her neck firmly. She moaned against his lips, holding his face in both hands. When they pulled away, they were out of breath.

“Okay, maybe I exaggerated a little bit.” She smiled. “But the point is, I love you. Nobody else.”

Grayson sighed. “I love you.” He pressed his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry.”

“You should be.”

“Hey.”

“What? You should.”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine. You’re right.”

He kissed her forehead. “I’m really sorry. I’ve been a huge dick.”

“You sure have.”

Then her nose. “I was an idiot to be jealous.”

“Mhm.”

And then a peck on her lips. “I love you. So much.”

She grinned. “I love you too.”

“Promise me one thing?”

“What?”

“You’ll always be mine?” he asked, his lips grazing against hers.

She smiled at him. “I’m all yours.” she said, then connected their lips once more.

496 notes · View notes

enby-and-f-fics · 3 years

Text

Little Libero {AsaNoya}

--F

Summary: Littlespace - the act of regressing into a childlike state; such as a baby, toddler, or a child. Nishinoya is a little that has no caregiver and is not out to his club members. One day he slips and practice and everything escalated from there.

Word count: 4077

---------------

It had been a long day for Noya. He was tired, and practice hadn't even started yet. He hadn't been getting as much sleep because exam season was coming up and he hadn't been able to slip for a while. All of the stress had started piling up.

He was so tired and stressed that he wasn't as accurate with his receives and the whole team could tell something was off about the little libero.

After missing the ball for about the tenth time, he couldn't take it anymore. He just froze. He couldn't move, he couldn't speak, he just froze.

Of course a few people were concerned. "Hey Noya," Asahi said, "Are you ok?"

Noya could feel himself slipping "No, I can't, not here" he said under his breath and realized he was close to crying. He started running out of the gym before anyone could see. Except one person did.

"Shit."

Tsukishima could tell something was off with Noya when he saw him freeze. He could definitely tell something was off when he heard what Noya had said. He had only heard that type of desperation from one person before. It was the first time that Tadashi had slipped in front of him.

Tsuki ran after Noya. Almost everyone on the team got immediately more scared for Noya because they thought that Tsuki was going to hurt him or something but, Yamaguchi stoped them, as he had also heard what Noya had said. Everyone skeptically returned to practice after a little more convincing from Yamaguchi.

~~~in the hallway~~~

Once Tsuki got into the hallway, he started looking for Nishinoya. After about 30 seconds of searching, he found him. He was hunched over his knees leaning against a wall. Tsuki could hear the faint sniffling of a child who was crying but didn't want anyone to notice (and was not doing a very good job).

"Hey," Tsuki said softly as to not scare the boy, "Are you little?"

Noya didn't know how to respond. He couldn't tell if Tsuki was going to judge him. His mind being younger didn't help, as Tsuki was pretty intimidating if you didn't know him.

Tsukishima could see the hesitation from the smaller boy, so he knelt down to be on the same level as him. "Bubba, you can talk to me. I won't hurt you."

Hearing him use that nickname made Noya calm down considerably. He peaked over his knees to see Tsukishima with nothing but care in his eyes. Noya jumped up and into Tsuki's arms. The taller was slightly taken off guard but quickly regained his balance.

After about 10 minuets of Tsuki talking with a babbling Noya sitting on his lap and playing with his fingers, Noya started to nod off. Tsuki realized and waited for him to fall asleep before picking him up. Noya immediately snuggled more into Tsuki's shoulder for safety. Tsuki chuckled slightly at the clingy libero as he started heading back to the gym.

Once he got back to the gym, he hesitantly opened the doors as to not wake Noya. He walked in and everyone went silent. They saw the strong headed libero curled up into Tsukishima's arms and their jaws dropped. They all started to stammer our questions when Noya started to stir. Tsuki cooed and shushed him back to sleep and glared daggers at the rest of the team.

He walked over to a corner of the room where it would be less noisy and he could make sure that Noya got the sleep he needed while he was still able to watch the practice.

Yamaguchi walked over to when they were sitting and knelt down to their level. "How's the little guy doing?" Tsuki looked down and pet the sleeping boy's head "He was really tired. He fell asleep after like 10 minutes. This should help." Yams nodded and when back to practice.

For the next hour, everyone else continued practice while Noya continued sleeping on Tsuki's lap. When Noya started to wake up, Tsuki checked to see if he was still in little space.

"Nishinoya?"

"Hmm...? Oh... Oh my god Tsukishima I'm sorry!" Noya frantically scrambled out of Tsuki's lap. Seeing the struggle, he lifted him off his lap so that he could make sure that Noya didn't hurt himself.

"How did you...?"

"Tadashi. I've been his caregiver for quite a few months now."

"Oh."

"Do you want us to help you tell the rest of them?" Tsuki wanted to make sure that Noya wasn't stressed right out of little space to prevent him slipping again.

"Yes please..."

"Yamaguchi, can you come over here?"

"Of course!" Yamaguchi came bounding over so that the three of them could discuss a plan to tell them.

Once, they figured out their plan, Yamaguchi called everyone over and gave Noya an encouraging pat on the back.

"So, I'm a little,"

"...A little what?" Asahi asked.

"Not a little something. Just a little. I sometimes slip into little space when I'm stressed or haven't slept in a while as a way to release some stress."

"Oh," Daichi said, "Okay."

"So you're not mad?"

"No, of course not," Suga said, "why would we be mad for something that helps you?"

"Well I don't know. Some people just find it really weird." Noya explained.

"Yeah, we don't care." Tanaka joined in, "I'm just really curious as to why Tsuki was such a good... what is it called?"

"Caregiver," Tsukishima answered, "I've been Yamaguchi's caregiver for months now so I've gotten the hang of it."

"You WHAT??" Tanaka exclaimed, "YOU'RE ACTUALLY GOOD AT TAKING CARE OF SMALL CHILDREN?????"

"Umm, yeah. I work at a day care."

"WHAT??"

~~~~~~~~

Asahi was intrigued the whole time. Having come to the conclusion that he had a crush on the libero, he had tried to pay more attention and learn about the things that he liked.

For example, this thing called "little space".

He was intrigued by the concept of regressing into a different headspace. The more he read, the more he wanted to be Nishinoya's caregiver. He felt tinge of jealously of Tsukishima, him really being the only to see him little. He wanted to see the soft, child like side of his crush.

He decided that the next day at practice, he would ask Tsukishima a few more things about how to be a good caregiver and such. He really did want to be Nishinoya's "primary caregiver" as he learned that night.

~~~~~~~~

Asahi had decided to start with asking Yamaguchi for help with being a good caregiver, as he was a little as well, and much less intimidating than Tsukishima.

"Hey Yamaguchi," he said to the pinch server across the room, "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course!" Tadashi bounded over to the ace as he spoke, having a feeling what this conversation was about, based one the events of the previous day. "What's up?"

"Umm... well I was wondering what it takes to be a good caregiver, and since you have Tsukishima, and apparently he's good at this, I thought you could give me some pointers?" Asahi said as he fumbled with his hands.

Yamaguchi chuckled, "Well it's usually specific to each little but based on how I've seen you interact with people I think your biggest problem would be setting rules and sticking to them."

"Hey! What do you mean?" Asahi was mildly offended. He did see that he was less than intimidating to someone who knew him but he could hold rules if he needed to.

"You're talking to me instead of Tsuki. Isn't that enough?" Asahi couldn't really defend himself. He was, indeed talking to the less intimidating person in the duo. "Also, why are you so adamant about being his caregiver? I mean everyone else did some basic research but you seem to want to go the extra mile."

"Umm..." Asahi was flustered. Was he really that obvious that he felt something more toward the spiky headed libero? Had anyone else noticed?

"Ah! I made you uncomfortable! I'm sorry! Tsuki and I have seen the way that you look at each other and it looks like more that's friendship."

"Well... I mean you are right..." Asahi didn't know what to do with this information. "Wait, did you just say that he looks at me that way?" Tsukishima, having heard the ruckus of Tadashi frantically apologizing, wanted to make sure everything was ok. "Are you blind? He quit volleyball because of you. He wouldn't come back if you didn't too."

"Oh," Asahi said, "I see your point. I guess he might like me too?" He was still quite skeptical, as Nishinoya seemed to be lusting after Kiyoko at the very same moment.

"You'll never be sure if you don't tell him," Yamaguchi said, "Have you thought about confessing? I mean it worked for me."

"Well sure bu- wait, what? What do you mean it worked for you?" Asahi was quite confused, he never really saw Yamaguchi interact with anyone besides Tsukishima, but he was still kind of mean to the pinch server. "Who?!"

"That would be me." Tsukishima said, slightly wrapping his arm around the shorter's waist, "Caregiver and boyfriend."

Just as he finished saying that, they heard a cry from across the gym. Someone had gotten hurt, and it just so happened to be the one who could slip into little space.

"Oh my god, Noya! Are you ok?" Tanaka, as he had been the one closest to him, heard the impact. He could tell this was more than just a little trip. "Asahi." Daichi said quickly. Asahi ran to get the first aid kit.

They had had incidents before but there hadn't been any major injuries, he was hoping this one wasn't.

"Here you go, Daichi," Asahi frantically brought the first aid kit that they had, up to this point, only had to use for cuts and bruises. The wounded libero was still crying. Almost the whole team had tried to calm him down. Almost.

"Asahi, will you try to get him to calm down so we can see where he hurt himself?" Daichi said, who was still hurting at the sight of one of his children crying. "Please?"

"Umm, okay," Asahi really still had no idea what to do but he just wanted to badly for his crush to stop crying that he was willing to try anything. "Hey baby, can you come here?" He said, picking the boy, his small frame fitting perfectly in his arms.

"Hey, shhh, you're ok. Shh shh shh." He slightly rocked the crying little from side to side, trying everything to get his baby to calm down. Soon, after some more cuddles from the ace, Nishinoya's crying was reduced to small sniffles. "Hey, baby, can you tell me where it hurts? We're gonna make it better, okay?"

The little just buried his face into the taller's chest, whimpering, seeming to not want to talk. "Hurts."

"Aww, honey I know, I know," Asahi stroked the smaller boy's face, "Can you show me where it hurts?"

Nishinoya turned his head slightly and pointed at his ankle, whimpering. Asahi looked at Daichi, who had been watching, and gave the nod to start treating his ankle. He had only just touched it and the poor boy started to tear up again. Everything was magnified when he was little, feelings, affections, and most definitely, pain. "Oh, poor thing. It's ok, sweetheart, I'll be gentle." Daichi could see how much pain the small libero was in and could only wonder what he had done to hurt himself. "Asahi, will you try to distract him while I do this?"

"Of course," he was still stroking the younger boy's head in an attempt to calm him. It seemed to be working until Daichi tried to turn his ankle to see if it was broken and Noya started crying again. "Hey, shh, you're ok, I'm right here, okay baby? I'm right here," Daichi started to wrap his ankle, "Just keep looking at me, you're doing so well."

It was clear to everyone in the room that Asahi was a natural. He knew just what to say to calm the boy, it seemed as if he had been his caregiver for years.

Nishinoya was still whimpering slightly but with being in Asahi's lap and his calming words, the tears had once again stopped.

"Okay, well it's nothing very major, it's a little sprained and very bruised. It should be better after a few days of rest. Just to be sure, Asahi, will you take him home and stay with him? I don't think he will completely remember to take it easy, considering he is in little space right now." Daichi said, ever the worried captain.

"Oh, ummm... Sure, I guess." Asahi was quite worried, knowing that his parents were out of town, so he would have to stay the whole weekend to make sure he didn't hurt himself more.

"You two can start to head home since neither of you are gonna do any more practice," Suga said, "Right, Daichi?"

"Yeah. Go home and get some rest, both of you."

Asahi started to gather their bags and carried Noya to the changing rooms to help him get ready to go. He started to set the boy down on one of the benches in the changing room so that he could help him change but before he could, the boy started whimpering and clutched his shirt even harder.

"Oh, I'm sorry baby, is everything okay?"

"Don wanna leave you." Noya whispered, barely being loud enough for the ace to hear, "Please don leave."

"Aww, honey," Asahi's heart broke. He could never leave the little and his remark made him wonder who hurt the small libero for him to be that desperate to not even let go of him. "Don't worry, baby, we just need to get you changed so that we can go home and sleep. Does that sound okay to you?"

"Okay, promise you won leave?"

"I promise, honey."

~~~~~~~~

They had both gotten changed, Noya wanting to cling to Asahi the entire time. "Okay, baby. Are you ready to go home now? We can go home and cuddle more, okay?"

The smaller boy nodded sleepily and cuddled further into the ace's shoulder. "Mhm."

Asahi couldn't help but chuckle at the actions of the little. It was definitely time for a nap. He stared walking in the direction of Nishinoya's house, all the while talking to the smaller boy to keep him calm and lull him to sleep. Fortunately, the slight bounce of the tall boy's walk did put the second year to sleep.

Soft snores from the ace's shoulder alerted him of this fact just as they were walking up to the steps of the Nishinoya household. Asahi slowly walked up and opened the door as to not wake the sleeping little.

He was able to drop his and Noya's bags at the front door and take his shoes off before heading toward the younger's room.

He reached the room and set the sleeping boy down onto the bed and made a move to leave as to alert his mother that he would be staying at Nishinoya's house for the weekend. Before he could get to far, he felt a hand clutch his shirt. "You said you won leave." He heard a small voice coming from the bed, slightly groggy to tell his that the little was still asleep.

"Okay, honey, I won't" Asahi could hear the desperation in his voice so he crawled into the bed with him, wrapping his arm around the smaller boy so that he was sleep on his chest. He decided to text his mom, instead of calling like he had originally planned as to not disturb the libero.

Me: Hey, just letting you know that I'm going to stay at Noya's for the weekend. He hurt himself at practice and his parents are on a work trip.

Mom <3: Okay, hun! Let me know if you need anything!

Me: Thanks, mom. Love you!

Mom <3: Love you too!

Now that that was taken care of, he was able to focus all his attention on the boy currently sleeping on his chest. For about an hour, he just laid there and watched the younger's breaths. 'He looks so vulnerable, just sleeping there,' Asahi thought to himself, 'He's so cute. I really am in love with him.'

"I love you. I know you're asleep and can't hear me and I don't know whether I'm disappointed or relieved. I love you so much that every time I look at you my heart flutters. Today has been one of the best days because I've gotten to take care of you." Asahi couldn't help but voice his feelings to the sleeping libero. He had fallen completely head over heels for the boy and couldn't bear to hold it in any longer. This didn't mean that he suddenly had the courage to actually confess, but at least telling a sleeping Noya was better than keeping it to himself any longer. "Thank you for being who you are."

With that, he decided to get some sleep too. The weight on his chest actually comforted him and made it much easier to fall asleep.

Little did he know that Nishinoya had woke up in big space and heard everything that the ace had said.

~~~~~~~~

Nishinoya was silently freaking out. The boy he had liked for a year had just unintentionally confessed to him. 'Okay, I can do this,' he thought to himself. 'I can't do this.'

He really didn't know what to do. It's not everyday that your crush just confesses that they LOVE YOU. The smaller boy looked at the clock and realized it was 10:00. 'Wow, how long did I sleep?' He tried to stretch his legs without waking Asahi, only to feel a sharp pain in his ankle, which made him wince. The taller male drew Noya in closer to try and smooth the boy. He was a natural even when he was asleep.

Nishinoya couldn't ignore how comfortable this position was. He was warm and comforted by the arms wrapped around him, and the beating heart under his head provided white noise to lull to sleep as soon as he closed his eyes.

'Okay, I'll do something about this tomorrow.' He thought just before falling sound asleep.

~~~~~~~~

Asahi woke up to his phone alarm, quickly turning off the alarm, trying not to disturb the sleeping Nishinoya. He couldn't help but to reach out and pet the smaller's hair. The libero made a slight purring noise, indicating that he enjoyed it, which amused the ace. He sure didn't expect that noise to come out of Noya.

Nishinoya's eyes fluttered open with a smile on his face as he looked at the taller, 'God, he looks amazing in the morning.' The sunlight was just barely peaking through the curtains, illuminating Asahi's face with a golden light.

"Hi." Asahi's voice was gruff with sleep. Noya couldn't hold himself back anymore. He reached up and put his hand on Asahi's cheek.

"Umm, Noya, what are yo-" Asahi was cut off by soft lips being placed on his. Asahi was shocked for a second before he realized what was happening and started to kiss him back. Their lips moved together in perfect synchronization as if they were made for each other.

They both had to eventually part for air. "Wow, that was... wow" Asahi couldn't believe what just happened. His crush had kissed him out of nowhere.

"I love you too." Nishinoya, feeling bold after the kiss, decided that now was the best time just to spill all of his feelings. "I heard you last night. You were so sweet and I didn't know what to do. And then your voice was just... I couldn't hold myself back anymore." He finished with a slight chuckle, looking at the flustered ace.

"I... just.... umm..." Asahi didn't know what to do with himself, he had just had a make out session with his crush AND he confesses to him AND he had heard all of the things that he had said the previous night. "Will you be my boyfriend?"

Nishinoya blushed slightly at the offer. "Yes, of course." He leaned up to give the taller boy one last peck before moving to get up, completely forgetting about his ankle, only to be very abruptly reminded as he fell trying to get out of the bed.

"Oh my god, Noya! Are you okay?!"

"Agh, yeah. I kinda forgot." He tried to lighten the mood with a chuckle, only to be shot down with a look from Asahi. "Come on, I'll cary you to the kitchen and make breakfast. We have about two hours until we need to be at practice."

Asahi picked up the injured libero and brought him to the kitchen island. He then started to make breakfast as he had said. He practically lived at the Nishinoya residence, so he knew where all of the ingredients for various meals were. Nishinoya couldn't cook so he would often come over and make meals for him.

"Pancakes?"

"YES!!!!" The smaller boy seemed very excited about the prospect of pancakes, so the Asahi started on them. They filled the time with small talk, just like they always had. Except this time was different. Nishinoya couldn't keep his eyes off of his now boyfriend, he just couldn't believe it. "I love you," he said.

"I love you too, but if you keep staring at me I'm gonna mess up the pancakes."

~~~~~~~~

"Ok, time for practice!" Nishinoya said enthusiastically, starting to get up from where he was sitting on the bed.

"Not so fast, mister," Asahi caught Nishinoya before he could stand up completely, knowing he was going to hurt himself further if he started to run out the door. "You're not going anywhere by yourself. Come on." Asahi picked up the younger boy, making sure that he had a secure hold before setting off to get their bags.

They started out the door, with Nishinoya carrying the bags, him insisting that he can at least do something. The walk to practice stayed in a comfortable silence between the two boys.

Asahi walked in the door to see almost everyone chatting around. He moved over to a bench and sat down with Noya in his lap. Daichi came over to check his ankle and frankly because he was curious about why they were being so touchy. Nishinoya was always touchy with the taller but never this much and without Asahi excessively blushing.

"What's going on between you too, huh?" He said with a raise of an eyebrow, at a low voice as to not alert any others that something was happening between the two, in case they weren't quite ready to tell other people.

This is when Asahi became flustered. "Um w-what do you mean? There's n-nothing going on."

"Oh please," Nishinoya scoffed. He lowered his voice so that just Asahi could hear, "You say that as if you weren't making out with me just this morning."

Asahi let out a small squeal, which surprised Daichi as he had never seen Asahi this flustered. "Ahh, so there is something. Come on, spill."

"Well," Nishinoya started, seeing as Asahi was in no condition to explain, "I won't go into details be we are dating now."

"Finally." Suga said, coming up from behind Daichi, wondering what was taking so long. "Did the coward finally confess?"

"Hey, I'm not a coward..." Asahi wavered, his voice getting smaller with each word.

"Aww, it's okay, honey." Nishinoya said, "You're my coward."

"Awww." Daichi and Suga said in unison. "Well, Noya, your ankle is better than yesterday but you still can't practice today. Sorry. But we do need to start practice now."

"Ok, fine." Nishinoya said, getting up in the process to let Asahi stand up. Once Asahi was up, he sat back down in order to avoid being scolded by both Asahi and Daichi for being on his feet when he's not completely healed.

Daichi and Suga had moved away by then and had called everyone to start warming up. Asahi had moved to go with them before Nishinoya grabbed his arm and pulled him down to give the ace a small peck. "I love you."

Asahi blushed before looking back at the small libero.

"I love you too."

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mollymauk-teafleak · 3 years

Text

whose brow is laid in thorn (chapter one)

You guys have no idea how long I’ve been building this universe in my head as I’ve been falling asleep. Huge thanks to @minky-for-short and @spiky-lesbian, my ever faithful and patient betas and wonderful friends

please reblog and leave a comment on ao3!

----------

Mollymauk has been waiting for this day since he was eighteen years old.

Not the day he'll be crowned king, that day is a long way off and he's none too eager for it. No, today is the day the love of his life is returned to him, after they were separated when their affair was discovered.

But Caleb Widogast has been in the hands of the Volstruker. And who is coming back is not the same man who left.

So is that man still there?

----------

Mollymauk didn’t wake up, not really. To say he woke up would have implied he’d ever slept and he didn’t so much as doze that night, not even for a moment.

But when the dawn filtered under the thick curtains of his chambers and fell across the rich carpets, he did feel some sort of start. Though it wasn’t anything like waking up.

It felt more like coming back to life. He’s coming home.

He bolted upright, breath suddenly coming fast like he’d been sprinting. His mouth dried and the sudden need to move and move quickly crackled through his nerves, though he had no idea what to do with any of it.

Clothes. He’d start with that, seeing as he was completely naked save the silk sheets and his tattoos. Normally he’d wait for his sister, to get ready with her, but Jester really liked to sleep in and he'd always felt mean waking her up before the sun had cleared the horizon. Unless it was him doing it by repeatedly smashing a goosefeather pillow into her face.

And he needed some time to himself this morning. He’s coming home.

He lit the candles then looked through his vast wardrobe, normally grabbing the first thing he came across whether it was appropriate for court or not. People had long since given up on expecting him to be appropriate, full stop. His fathers senechal didn’t even roll her eyes as much when he would come to take his seat, dressed in feathers and sequins with far too much of his deep violet skin on display. Mollymauk actually suspected his father had turned it into a play, to further intimidate his already plenty intimidated supplicants.

But this morning his fingers passed over the usual silks, satins and samites. He couldn’t help but think of how he’d dressed back then, gods, ten years ago now. His fingers kept moving, further and further back into the racks, as if he could go back in time so easily. As if everything could be undone. As if he could be the Mollymauk he’d been back then just by dressing like him.

His chest clenched tightly. He’s coming home.

Eventually he found a close fitting tunic with a high neck, in a dark blue colour, clearly from some time before it was politically necessary for him to be wearing the house colours at all times. Soft doeskin breeches underneath, no jewellery save what he always wore in his horns. Just some kohl outlining his full, red eyes. He wanted to look as much like the Mollymauk he would remember as possible, whether it would change anything or not.

When the heavy knock on his chamber door came and it swung back with an iron and oak creak, Molly wasn’t surprised to see Yasha standing there, already dressed and ready to go and also very much not surprised to see him in the same state. Yasha had always understood him in that way.

“Your highness,” she said in that soft voice of hers, bending in a small half bow.

None of his other friends ever used his official titles outside of the courtroom but, after years as his aide de camp, she had turned them into a term of endearment. Hearing her say it gave him a reason to smile, in the middle of everything he was feeling.

“Good morning, Yasha,” he beckoned her in from where he sat at his dressing table, still looking at himself in the mirror.

“I checked with the night guard, your highness. All clear, nothing to report,” she intoned, as she did every morning before anything else was addressed.

“Good,” Molly murmured, attention elsewhere, “I, uh, take it my mother and father are still abed?”

“Soundly, your highness.”

Molly nodded tightly to his reflection. He didn’t want the king here for this. The less bad memories were waiting for him on the palace steps, the better.

Then why do you imagine he’ll want you there? A nasty little voice whispered inside his mind, making him clench his hands into fists. Molly swallowed hard and pushed it away, trying to wipe any trace of it off his face before Yasha could see it in the mirror.

He either hadn’t moved fast enough or their friendship ran too deep. He saw his friend’s face tighten ever so slightly, felt her hand rest on his shoulder and squeeze firmly.

“Are you ready for this, your highness?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper. It was wise to never speak too loudly anywhere in this castle, not even in the bedchamber of it’s crown prince. Molly had learned that lesson early in life.

But still not early enough.

“I am,” he made himself meet Yasha’s eyes, or at least the reflection of them, “He’s coming home. He’s finally coming home. And everything’s going to be right again.”

If there was a flicker of doubt in his friend’s ash-ringed eyes, then Mollymauk didn’t see it. Instead he looked into his own face, bathed in candlelight and dawn, so he could see the certainty there and forget he’d forged it himself out of dreams and selective memories. So he could make himself believe it when he whispered it once more.

Caleb Widogast was coming home and everything would be right again.

People in the castle whispered about it, of course they did. But it just joined the never ending current of gossip and low level scandal that ran through the place because of the wayward crown prince. Caleb had become another faceless body in their prince’s bed, of the hundreds they imagined crowded in there like a tavern on a festival night. Earlier on than most, granted, but every bit as transient.

And even then Mollymauk still wasn’t the most interesting member of the royal family. Just the safest to gossip about.

It would make Mollymauk laugh bitterly, to imagine their faces if they’d only known. Caleb hadn’t been one of many. He’d been the first. He’d been everything.

They were called the Volstrucker, their true purpose shrouded by naming them in a language few people this side of the Xorhasian border spoke. For the few that could be openly seen at court, people had grown used to them and long ago grown bored of making up stories about them. They’d stopped questioning Sorah’s never ending vigil at the king’s side, the higher courtiers that were granted peeks behind the curtain thought little of the people in black who hid their faces and brought reports under magical seals that the king would read and then promptly burn. To them, Trent Ikithon was just another courtier, a noble chased from the Empire and trying to scratch some semblance of the power he’d once wielded through the benevolence of the king, clearly providing him some service they had better not dwell on too long.

Bodyguards, spies, personal assassins, fallen sorcerers with their uses, all these things were common in this court and drew little attention when no threads could be found between them all.

And when the crown prince was given a companion at the age of ten, a thin, pale boy with dark red hair and sharp blue eyes, the court accepted it when they were told he was just that. A companion. A personal guard. Hardly unusual, given that this was their heir to the throne. It was only natural that he would have his own version of his father’s silent, hulking goliath and it was rather smart, after all, to have the two boys grow alongside each other to strengthen the bond between them.

But of course, that was exactly the point of the Volstrucker. To blend into the background, to repel whispers and speculation as easily as shaking rainwater off a cloak, to run beneath the surface of things. It was what allowed them to operate as the most vicious, effective and brutal assassins and war mages anyone inside or outside of the Empire had ever seen. To be the stuff of legends and nightmares while never appearing so.

That was Caleb Widogast. Prince Mollymauk’s own personal Volstruker, the kind of privilege only extended to the most powerful people. And of course, those most powerful people who had close ties to their handler. Trained from their shared youth to give his life in service of his prince, to jump before every blade aimed at his neck, to either slaughter the enemy or take the sword point through his own flesh. Drilled in the most dangerous offensive magic, shaped by Ikithon’s hand out of common dirt to serve a greater purpose, to once day stand by the throne when it was Mollymauk’s turn to sit it or to perish getting him there.

That was who Caleb was. Or at least what he’d been intended as.

“An hour after dawn. That was what they said.”

Molly was pacing back and forth across his room, hands fidgeting with the adornments in his horns. Yasha sat patiently on his bed, again demonstrating how she could be such a stickler for protocol in some areas and then completely disregard it in others. Their long friendship always had been that strange kind of patchwork.

“They did say that, your highness,” she agreed patiently, for the tenth time that morning.

“So how long does it take to travel from this place?” the panic began rising on his throat, “This place they won’t even bloody tell me where it is? Because it damn far past an hour after dawn!”

Yasha took a deep, patient breath, one of many that she’d taken between coming into her prince’s room and this moment, “The roads have been dangerous of late. Perhaps they’ve just been delayed. Perhaps there was rain over the mountains. Perhaps a tree fell across the king’s road. Perhaps a million other things happened that we do not need to be worrying ourselves over right now.”

Molly flushed, folding his arms across his chest and staring sullenly at his boots, “There’s probably a few we should be worrying about…”

“Molly, think who he’s with. Is there really anything that would stop a pack of Volstreker for very long?”

“He...he was just never late,” Molly replied after a long, long pause, his voice sounding very far away and very young, “That was one of the things he hated most, being late.”

He wasn’t looking but he heard how his friend’s voice became very clipped and careful, her accent coming through stronger like it did when she was minding her words very closely, “My prince...Caleb may not be the friend we remember…”

Molly looked up sharply, his eyes bright and hard like rubies, “Caleb was not just my friend. Caleb was the love of my life. He is the love of my life. We’re soulmates.”

Yasha sighed again, though this one she kept to herself. Arguing with Mollymauk was a chore most of the time, nigh on impossible when he got that fire in his eyes, the same fire that could be seen in the king’s more and more frequently.

The fire that worried her every time she saw it reflected on her friend’s face.

So Yasha wouldn’t argue with him. She would do what she had always done, what she’d learned how to do when she’d been handed this broken boy at the age of eighteen and helped him put himself back together over ten long years, what people were afraid to do for a prince but gods did he need it. She would pull back his armour and show him what was underneath.

“Molly,” she stood, taking a few steps towards him, her sad eyes catching the candlelight, “What happened was not your fault.”

It was like watching a single crack in a sheet of ice bring a whole glacier face crumbling down. Yasha moved quickly, bringing Molly into her arms before he could even choke out a sob, as the tears he’d probably needed to cry since he’d heard Caleb was coming home burst forth.

For a moment, as her knees hit the thick carpet, it was as it had been ten years ago. Those long, awful months after Caleb had been taken away, when Molly couldn’t find the strength to rise from his bed, when the chambermaid Veth would bring him meals he wouldn’t eat, when Jester would come ask her big brother to play with her and it would be like she wasn’t there, when no good natured threats from Beau would get him down to the practise yard, when Fjord would come with tales of his travels and get no response. Caduceus, the palace healer, had done all he could for him, eventually only able to bow his head and sigh and say it wasn’t for any medicine to cure the nasty shock of a broken heart. The king had known better than to try and reach out to his son, knowing this had driven a chasm between them that would not be repaired. The queen had sat outside his chamber door for days on end, waiting until he would see her again.

Ikithon said Caleb had been taken for training. Re-education. The screaming nightmares that would bring Yasha and Jester running to Molly’s chambers at all hours proved just how much they believed that.

But Yasha squared her shoulders and let Molly weep against her. It wasn’t like that any more. Her prince had grown stronger since then, and wiser, this was just the aftershocks of an earthquake that had passed. He’d learned not to shut his friends out.

He proved that when he finally whispered, voice trembling, “But what if he blames me?”

Yasha squeezes his shoulders gently, “Think of the Caleb you knew. How well you understood each other. How clever he was. Do you really think he’d blame you?”

“No…” Molly drew back with a final sigh that sounded something like relief, “No he wouldn’t.”

“You know who's to blame,” Yasha’s voice hardened at the edges.

Molly’s mouth twisted, the way it often did when thoughts of that man strayed through his mind, Having him so close for the last ten years, seeing his smug smile and cruel eyes every day at court, at every royal banquet, in the council chambers, it had taken all of the combined efforts of his friends to convince him the matter couldn’t be settled with the point of his scimitars.

Not without angering the king. And despite everything Mollymauk said, despite the mask he wore, he was terrified of the king. He couldn’t hate him, not truly, not even after he ordered your heart torn in two and one half banished to gods knew where. Not even after everything he’d seen him do, the executions he’d ordered, the other kingdoms he’d seen him raze in war, watching from behind what little protection his mother could offer him. And even beyond the things he’d seen him do lurked the things he suspected.

But you couldn’t hate the man who’d saved your life. Who’d found you as an orphan and adopted you, named you heir to his kingdom, gave you a family and a name and a crown. Who had shown you love, perhaps, once upon a time.

Fear was easier. And so Mollymauk feared his father.

“I don’t want to think about that right now,” the tiefling rubbed at his eyes, smudging kohl across the bridge of his nose, “I just want to see him. I need to know he’s okay.”

Yasha opened her mouth, about to say something comforting while still trying to manage her prince’s expectations, when there came shouts from the far side of the bailey. From the main gate. Riders approaching.

Molly stiffened, eyes opening wide, lighting up with more hope than Yasha had seen on his face in years, so much so that she couldn’t help but smile.

“He’s home,” Mollymauk breathed.

The clamour raised by the approaching visitors must have woken Jester. As Mollymauk stood in the audience chamber, smoothly maintaining his princely face, she came bursting through the side door, clearly having dressed in a hurry. She ran up to take her place at his side, panting and grinning, eyes sparkling with excitement.

“Is he here yet? Is he here?” she gasped, taking her brother’s hand and squeezing tight.

Molly chuckled fondly, dropping the act for the moment and winding an arm around her in a hug. He could never maintain it around Jester.

“Not yet. They’re just dismounting in the foreyard, we don’t even know if it's them yet…”

“Oh of course it is!” Jester rolled her eyes before the splitting grin came back, “I can’t believe he’s here, we’re all together again. It’ll be just like it was before!”

Molly couldn’t hide his own delight, not when her’s was taking it by the hand and tugging it up to the surface. But he needed to wear the right face for this, settling for laughing and scrubbing her blue hair quickly before pushing her away.

“Come now, at least try and look suitably intimidating,” he teased, moving back to standing tall with his hands clasped at the small of his back to put the hilts of his infamous scimitars on show, “The king would be most disappointed if any of our visitors left with dry smallclothes.”

“That’s not my job,” Jester snorted, like he were the world’s biggest fool rather than her future liege, “My job is to stand and look dumb and pretty to get them off their guard.”

Molly nudged her with a sharp elbow which she mostly dodged, “And brain them with a psychic lollipop if I lose my swords.”

“And brain them with a psychic lollipop if you lose your swords!” she repeated cheerily, giving him a wink before her face settled into something softer, something not unlike the look Yasha had given him as she’d helped him to his feet, “I’m really happy for you, Molly.”

Molly had his eyes facing firmly forward, he could hear voices from behind the gilded doors or the audience chamber. But the corner of his mouth turned up and the tension in his shoulders lessened slightly.

He was glad to have his sister beside him for this.

Because the door was opening and the man he loved, the man he’d loved since he was a child, the man whose absence had ripped a hole inside him he thought would never heal, was about to walk through the door.

Ikithon first, flanked by two nondescript figures in all black, a man and a woman. Molly greeted them with a stiff nod, his heart set on what lay behind them. A cloaked figure, hood up, the same stiff black uniform as the other two.

“Ah, Prince Mollymauk,” Ikithon intoned, voice as slippery as ever, “A welcome sight at the end of a long journey. It was my pleasure, of course, to bring your personal Volstruker back to you. Consider it yet another token of my sincere and genuine apology for the… unpleasantness he caused ten years ago.”

His voice lingered over that word, drawing it out into something sharp edged. Because of course he knew. Jester glanced anxiously at her brother.

Molly’s anger bubbled too close to the surface, he had to force the words through his teeth in a thin veneer of politeness, “You have the throne’s thanks, Archmage, as ever. Of course, I would be loath to keep you any longer, after such an arduous journey. You and your companions are dismissed to refresh yourselves. Immediately.”

He was rewarded by the slightest curling of Ikithon’s lip at his old title, the reminder of the one he used to own before he was cast out of the empire for his crimes. The same crimes the king had welcomed him in for.

“I will escort you myself!” Jester insisted with a sweet smile, smoothing the moment over in an instant, hurrying down the steps of the raised platform to sweep her arm out invitingly, seeming to put even the two senior Volstruker off guard, “Please follow me! I would so love to hear all about your journey!”

Jester was very hard to say no to. Within minutes they were gone into the luxurious depths of the castle and, given that this had been a very small welcome in the early hours of the morning, this left Mollymauk alone with Caleb.

His resolve broke as soon as the footsteps disappeared. Dropping all sense of decorum, he lurched forward, down the steps, unable to bear the distance between them.

“Caleb,” he nearly sobbed out, though still in control enough to drop his voice, “Gods, Caleb, it's so good to see you again. There’s so much I need to say to you but...Caleb?”

He hadn’t moved. There hadn’t been so much as a twitch in his muscles. Molly was panting, wild eyed, now close enough to reach out and touch him but he hadn’t flinched.

The voice stopped Mollymauk just as dead in his tracks. The most awful mix of familiar and foreign, the voice he knew but seeming to come from a different set of lungs.

“Your permission to remove my hood, your highness?”

Molly frowned, not understanding, feeling like he was in some strange dream now, actions not making sense and words coming out disjointed, “I...yes?”

With a slight nod, gloved hands swept back the heavy hood. It was almost exactly the face he’d imagined, the strong jaw and close beard of rust, the piercing blue eyes and high, handsome cheekbones. He’d grown into the handsome man Molly had always known he would be.

But he’d never imagined the expressionlessness in his eyes. The slack set of his jaw. He’d never imagined it would be like looking into the eyes of a doll or a painting.

Gods, it was so much worse than the looks of fear, pain, even the anger and hatred he’d seen in his nightmares.

“Caleb…” Molly groaned.

“I would like to apologise for my grievous errors when we were younger men, your highness,” the man who wasn’t Caleb intoned, completely flat, “I compromised my position as your Volstruker and took advantage of you in a completely unacceptable way. I swear to you that all degeneracy has been wiped clean and I am returned ready to do nothing but serve you with body and soul.”

He pulled his fist to his chest, keeping it there in a hard salute, one Molly had seen so many black clad figures make to Ikithon, to his father.

“I am yours, my prince.”

Molly’s heart shattered in his chest, tears running down his cheeks to drip onto the hands frozen halfway to taking Caleb in his arms.

“Caleb, what have they done to you?” he whispered, voice strained.

Someone had come home. But not the man he knew.

Not the man he loved.

#widomauk #critical role #mollymauk tealeaf #caleb widogast #cr fic #cr: mollymauk #cr: caleb #angst #royal au #prince and his knight #tw: brainwashing #tw: trauma #Molly and yasha friendship is my favourite thing #please reblog!!#please comment!!!

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melancholydreadfuldream · 4 years

Text

dream of the sky’s still blue

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 11th Doctor x Reader, 12th Doctor x Reader, 13th Doctor x Reader

Summary: Companion chosen by the Doctor are always special in their own way but you, you are just a tag-along, courtesy of Clara. Maybe that’s why it was easy for him to hurt and abandon you.

Warning: ooc, angst, insecurity, self-harm, depression, madness, suicidal, DW AU mess-up, etc

A/N: The timeline of adventures on this fic will be switch around hence the warning of AU. I also bullshitting my way with this fanfiction so this will contain plot hole. I hope you enjoy reading it nonetheless. Please like/comment if you like this fic?

What is it about love that make people do irrational thing? I had to go and fall in love with an alien and one who is so out of my league too. He's a silly man most of the times but also, he's the smartest man alive. He's kind and amazing. His name is the Doctor. It wasn't his real name but he said it's the only name that matter. Until Clara and I met River Song, the Doctor's wife, at least her ghost data...? Whatever that means...

River saved us when an enemy of the Doctor attacked us, demanding the Doctor to tell them his true name in order to open the Doctor's grave. She knew his true name. Why am I surprised? If anyone know, it would be his wife.

Clara and I were best friend since childhood. She was the only friend I have actually. I was invisible as a child and Clara saw me and made me her friend. Over the years, of course, she has got better friends, but to her, I will always be her best friend. She never left me behind.

I met the Doctor when he attempted to break into the house where Clara worked. After hearing Clara's distress voice from inside the house, I panicked too. After that, I witnessed this strange man rescued her. I was very grateful.

When the Doctor invited Clara to come along on board the Tardis, Clara agreed on the condition I can go with them too. To my surprise, he agreed immediately. I thought for sure he would not want me around. I was grateful to Clara because of her, I was able to see the wonder of the universe.

Of course, then I had to go and fell for the Doctor. He was kind and affectionate enough toward the both of us. I can't help blushing every time he put his hands on me. Much to my embarrassment, of course, Clara noticed and teased me about it. Clara, being the good friend, she encouraged me to confess my feeling for him but I didn't want to ruin whatever fragile friendship I have with the Doctor.

I can't help but be jealous of Clara. She has got the Doctor's attention almost immediately even though he met us roughly at the same time. I didn’t know it at the times that he had met her twice before. His impossible girl. Now I know why. Clara, the girl who was born to save the Doctor, splintered herself into many pieces inside the Doctor's timeline in order to rescue him.

It was then I noticed that Clara is slowly falling for the Doctor too. And who can blame her? The Doctor was such a charmer in his own way. Clara was special to the Doctor, I can tell. After all, the Doctor owed her a life debt for all those times her echoes died for his every incarnation.

I knew then I never stood a chance to gain his interest. I was just nobody, just a tag-along. And It's hurt, so much. I probably should have left, stop traveling with them and let whatever attraction between them become mutual. If anyone deserve to have the best in life, it would be her, Clara, my best friend.

But my heart couldn't let go just yet. So, I stick around. But I told Clara that I know that she has feeling for the Doctor too and I told her to go for it.

"It's not like I have a chance. He never sees me."

Clara was upset with me whenever I said that. "Then we will make him see you." she said as she gave me a hug. "You are my best friend. I want you to be happy."

"I want you to be happy too, Clara." I said. "You love him. You deserve to have a go with him. Don't hold back because of me."

7777

I watched as my Doctor, the Eleventh one, argued with his past self whom he introduced me as Tenth Doctor. I ended up with three Doctors during an adventure. At Clara's urging, I jumped into the portal, following the Doctor. It was Clara's idea for me to catch his attention. I have to stop being timid, she said. It was really hard to do but for the Doctor, I was willing to try and be reckless.

"You have feeling for my future incarnation." The War Doctor said suddenly.

I almost jumped in my seat. I didn't think he would talk to me. I gulped as I glanced at him much like a guilty child. "I...what? No, I..."

He chuckled. "Oh, your face..."

I glared at him this time.

After he was done with his amusement in my expense, he turned to me with wistful smile. "You should tell him."

"He doesn't feel the same." I blurted out.

He raised an eyebrow at me. "How do you know?"

"Because I saw how he look at Clara and I know..."

"Clara?"

"My best friend. His impossible girl."

The War Doctor nodded. "You should tell him anyway. He might surprise you."

I glanced at him and I opened my mouth to ask what he meant but he seemed distracted like he was seeing someone who was not there.

7777

Clara always said the right words. Thanks to her, the three Doctors ended up saving their home planet, instead of destroying it.

I smiled as the three Doctors and Clara are busy congratulating each other. To my surprise, the War Doctor came to me and gave me a hug. I hugged him back.

After the War Doctor and Tenth Doctor are gone, I finally realized something horrible. The War Doctor knew of my feeling for the Doctor, doesn't that mean my Doctor know? I was terrified at the realization. I wanted to find a hole and crawl under it. But, Clara assured me that the timeline was out of sync at the times, chances are the Doctor might not remember his time as the War Doctor anyway.

7777

Then Trenzalore happened.

We were in the town of Christmas with a truth field surrounding the town. Of course, Clara and I ended up embarrassing ourselves by accidentally revealing our feeling for the Doctor. Thankfully, the crisis at hand didn't give any of us time to address the issue. I was fine pretending I didn't say anything.

Then, the Doctor realized he has found Gallifrey on the other side of the crack of time in the wall inside the tower. The planet itself was surrounded by various enemies of Gallifrey, ready to reign hell upon Trenzalore.

The Doctor ordered Clara and I to go back to the Tardis and to charge his sonic screwdriver. Clara obeyed him immediately. I followed her but stopped short suddenly. Why did he send both of us just to charge his sonic? I had a sneaky suspicious that the Doctor was up to something. I didn't step into the Tardis and to my surprise, the Tardis suddenly vanished before my eyes.

I knew it. He was trying to spare us by sending us away. Didn't work though because I didn't get inside the Tardis. I turned to glance at the Tower. Now what? He will be angry when he realized I was still here. I know I'm being stupid; I did not have anything to offer the Doctor to help defending the planet, but I want to stay here with him. He will think I was a burden, a nuisance so maybe I should stay out of his sight for now.

"(name)?"

So much for staying out of sight. I turned around to face his wrath.

"What are you still doing here? You should be in the Tardis with Clara!"

"You send her away."

"You should not be here! This place is about to be a war zone! Do you understand?" He yelled at me angrily. "You could die if you stay here!"

"I know! I just, Doctor, but...I...I can't just leave you here alone." I said softly.

The Doctor stared at me, speechless. Then he growled. "You stupid...ugh!!"

I flinched. The words hurt but I braced myself.

He turned around and left me. He went back to the tower. "Get yourself into safety with the other!" He yelled without looking at me.

So, I did as I was told. I helped the others to evacuate to a safer place.

Thankfully, the Doctor was able to control the crisis in town.

7777

For the next few days, I avoided the Doctor and he didn't bother seek me out either. I caught a glimpse of him sometimes but I made sure I was out of his sight.

I made a friend here; her name is Laura. She was kind. She was, like me, a timid girl so I was drawn to her immediately. I was grateful for her presence. Most days, I missed Clara and wonder how she was doing back at home. I wonder if I would ever see her again. Laura made me feel less lonely. I would like to think that I did the same for her.

Laura made me feel welcomed here with some of the people in town. Most of them were very nice. She got me some routine job to spend my days so I did not get sad or bored. I was useless to the Doctor anyway.

I sat near one of the fireplaces at the yard in front of the town school. The town people are having a small celebration for days where they are not under attack. I smiled as I watched them being lively and happy despite the bad situation surrounding us. Even the Doctor seemed to have a good time, dancing silly dance with the children. The Doctor did always have soft spot for children.

Laura took a seat by my side and we got to talk about some stuff. She asked me about the Doctor. She noticed there are tension between the Doctor and me, she asked about it. She also noticed the longing look I apparently keep throwing at the Doctor.

Because of the damn truth field, I told her everything that is my truth. I told her I was in love with the Doctor and about how he didn't care about me like that. I told her about Clara and the Doctor. I told her that the Doctor never see me for me, that I was just Clara's friend and nothing else. And that I was somewhat okay with it. I have always known I was invisible among people. But I do wonder if he would be nicer if it was Clara instead who is trapped in the town with him. Clara would never take his harsh attitude and would probably be snarky right back at him. I couldn't.

I didn't realize I was crying until Laura gave me a hug.

A boy, Gilbert, approached us and asked Laura to dance with him. Laura accepted with my urging.

I watched them with a smile. Ah, to be young and in love. I sighed. I sounded like I was already old. I chuckled. And then the bitterness filled me. I was jealous. I hated myself for feeling like that.

I shuddered in cold even with the blanket around me. Suddenly, someone covered their jacket over my blanket. I glanced up and saw the Doctor. My heart skipped a beat as he took a seat beside me.

For a few seconds, he didn't say anything. Then he suddenly nudged me and then he said that he missed me.

I smiled softly at him. "I miss you too, Doctor."

"I'm sorry for how I acted before." He said softly.

I shook my head. "You were right. I was useless. There is nothing I can offer you to help. I was just being a nuisance to you."

The Doctor suddenly grabbed one of my arms while his other hand raised my chin to face him properly. "You are not a nuisance to me, (name). You are my friend. Despite the circumstance, I'm glad that you are here."

"There is no place I would rather be..." I said as I gazed at him and I realized it was the truth. This truth field made me being truth full and brave for some reason. Usually I would never say stuff like that out loud.

The Doctor stared at me. His eyes looked sad. He released me from his hold.

"Don't make that kind of face, Doctor. I choose this. I choose you." I said as I grabbed one of his hands.

"Even when you think I didn't care for you; you would still choose me?" He asked.

I frowned. Then I felt embarrassed when I realized he heard my talk with Laura earlier.

"You are wrong, you know. I do care about you. And you are not just Clara's friend. You are mine too." He said. "I'm sorry to make you feel like you are unseen to me."

I didn't know what to say to him now.

The Doctor stood suddenly and raised one hand toward me.

I glanced at him in confusion.

"Come with me. Back into the tower."

The Tower is where he stayed. I smiled at the invitation as I took his hand.

7777

Ever since that night, our relationship improved slightly. He was no longer ignoring me which I was very grateful.

I loved watching him work on whatever he is doing. I couldn't help him at all but I'm glad to be a witness to his awesomeness every time he solves something or have a grand plan. He even made a new sonic screwdriver from random stuff he found around.

I didn't stay with him all the time though. He always sends me away whenever the town is under attack. He was fiercely protective of me. I tried to watch over him too. It was a good thing I did. Once when the town is under fierce attack, he nearly got shot by a sneaky dalek but I pushed him down onto the road.

The Doctor is surprised to see me but he also quick to disable the dalek.

I pushed myself off him and glanced up at him as he quickly towers over me in anger.

"(name), what are you doing here?! I told you to hide!" He shouted at me.

"Watch your own back then, Doctor!!" I yelled angrily.

"You're hurt." The Doctor suddenly said as he bent his knees and grabbed one of my arms.

I just realized I got a graze from the shot just now. "It was fine."

The Doctor glared at me and then he barked orders on one of the town people to nurse my injury as he left me behind to deal with another attack somewhere else.

7777

I waited for the Doctor inside the tower. When he returned, he was giving me silent treatment much to my annoyance. So, I pushed him to talk to me.

"You could have died."

"So could you. I saved you." I said.

"I didn't ask you to."

"You didn't have to."

The Doctor glanced at me with that look of sorrow again. He suddenly put one hand over my cheeks. "Don't be reckless, (name), you've only one life. You are only human, so fragile."

"You told me this is your last generation and that you don't have anymore. Of course, I have to save you, Doctor. How can I let you die? You are the hope of this town, of the people. But also, because I love you. To see you die before me is not an option!" I said firmly.

The Doctor is giving me this look I can't decipher. "But it was okay to let me see you die first?"

"I am always going to die first. You know that. I'm sorry that I made you care for me, that maybe losing me will cause you some pain but I will not let you die before me. Because if you do, I don't want to live anymore." I probably shouldn't say that but damn truth field is outing all my pain. "But you, Doctor, you will live even if you lose me. And when the Tardis returned and all of this is over, you will go on your next adventure with Clara or some new companion whose life you changed for the better as you did mine. And I am okay with it. To die for you would be an honour."

"Oh, (name)...that's not something I want for you."

"Well, tough...this is my life, Doctor, my choice."

"You keep saying that but do you even understand?"

"Don't treat me like a child, Doctor."

"Then stop acting like it."

The words hurt. I knew if we kept talking, we will hurt each other more so I left the tower.

7777

Despite the warning not to go to the lake alone at night, I did it anyway. I just need to get away and so I did. And it was lucky that I did because I heard a child's cries for help. I perked up and tried to locate the source.

There was a little boy. He seemed to get stuck in the middle of the frozen lake. What is he doing over there in the first place? I wanted to run to get help from other people but the boy, upon seeing me, begged me not to left him behind. He was crying. I promised him I would return. I ran back and screamed for help, hoping someone would hear and come immediately. I returned back and quickly tried to get to the kid.

Of course, I should have left the rescue to professional. But I wasn't thinking, okay? The kid is making me panic too because he was crying really loud. I grabbed the kid just as some of people come upon us only to have the ice beneath us cracked and we both fell back into a cold dark water. And that's when I saw the body of the little girl inside. She was long dead it seemed.

7777

I woke up inside the tower with the Doctor looking so gloomy. It has been three days apparently since I was rescued from inside the lake.

"Doc...tor...?"

He looks relieved when he saw me woke up. He gave me water immediately. "You could have died, (name)..."

I wanted to roll my eyes. Not this argument again. "Doctor, please..."

"I could have lost you today." He didn't listen. "How can I ever face Clara if anything happened to you? You are her best friend, (name), she would kill me."

I chuckled.

The Doctor glared at me. "It's not funny. This is life or death, (name)."

I couldn't help but burst into a giggle.

The Doctor look affronted at not being taken seriously. "Shut up." he said with a pout.

I smiled softly. "Make me."

To my surprise, he kissed me softly.

I blinked in shock, definitely speechless.

He pulled back from the kiss and sighed against my forehead. "Don't ever do that again to me, (name). I can't bear to lose you too soon."

I didn't reply. My mind still busy on the fact that the Doctor just kissed me. He actually kissed me in the mouth and not for CPR. I can't think very clearly. My brain is no longer working.

"(name)?" He called out when I didn't respond.

"You kissed me."

"I...did?"

"You kissed me."

The Doctor suddenly feeling embarrassed now.

"Why?"

"I... don’t know, it just feels right at the moment?"

"Doctor!"

He sighed. "You choose me. So, this is me, choosing you right back."

I frowned at his wording. "I didn't ask you to."

"You didn't have to."

I don't know what this meant. Did he love me or did he just feel the obligation to love me back because I said it first and we are trapped here together for the time being? Did he pity me for my feeling for him? "I don't need your pity or your charity, Doctor." I spat with venom.

The Doctor look confused. "(name)..."

I turned my back from him and ignored him. Tears fell into my cheeks. I sniffed.

The Doctor sighed and for a few seconds, there are only awkward silence. "It wasn't pity or charity, (name)..." he finally said.

"I don't believe you..." I whispered but I know he can hear me.

7777

After I got better, I found out about the boy on the lake. His name is Adam. He was playing with a little girl named Greta on the lake and had an accident. Greta didn't survive, she hit her head hard when she fell into the lake.

Adam's parents are very grateful for me even though I didn't actually save him. Adam glanced at me timidly and give me flower as a gesture of gratitude. His mother told me that Adam might be crushing on me. I thought that was kind of adorable of him.

Laura fussed over me. She was glad that I survived. She filled me in about the three days I missed. Thankfully there are no attack during the time I was out of it.

Laura stayed with me and she talked and I listened. She got distracted by Gilbert and I teased her about him. She blushed cutely.

She asked me for advice regarding how to approach or have a talk with a boy.

I shook my head. "You're talking the wrong person if you are seeking love advice." I said. "I never have a boyfriend."

"Well, how do you usually talk with that Doctor of yours?"

This time I was the one who is blushing. "He's not my boyfriend!" I blurted out. I looked around worried that someone or the Doctor could hear us.

Laura grinned. "I never said he is. But...you want him to be, don't you?" She teased. "You love him."

I sighed. "The Doctor is not someone who just fall in love just like that. You would have to be very impressive person like Clara or River. And I'm not..." I said with a touch of sadness. "As for how I usually talk with him, well, mostly he does all the talking."

"If being with him pains you so much, why would you stay with him?" Laura asked. "Out of sight out of mind would be better, no?"

"I guess I'm not ready to let go..."

7777

The Doctor left for some meeting with the people he put in charge of security of the town. I was on my own in the tower. I pulled my ipod from my bag, the one I always carried everywhere we go. Thank God, I had the bag with me when I got stuck here. I love listening to music, they made my days more bearable. Clara used to tease me that I would put my earbuds just to put people off from talking to me. In a way, she was right.

Ever since I become the Doctor’s companion, I had to go out of my comfort zone more. Many times, I wondered whether I deserve to be his companion. I was too timid. Clara always had my back so it wasn’t so bad. But, she was not here right now. I had to force myself to interact with other people. I was very grateful to have meet and befriended Laura.

I took a seat on the stairs in the tower. I hummed along my current favorite song, a bittersweet song. Clara used to tease me for liking sad song but then she would also sing along with me whenever we were in a mood to sing. My heart ached at the memories. I missed her so much. I wish she was here with me.

I was so focused on my thought I didn’t realize when the Doctor returned and took a seat on the stairs where I was.

“What song are you listening too?”

I jumped in surprise. “Doctor! When did you get here?”

The Doctor shrugged and glanced at me, expecting me to answer his question.

Why was he that curious about the song I was listening to? I pulled off one of my earbuds and gave it to him.

The Doctor put on the earbud. He actually stayed still to listen to the song. He was usually so bouncy, unable to stay in one place for too long.

“It was my current favorite song.” I said.

He hummed. “Clara did mention you have thing for sad song.”

My eyes widened. “When did she say that to you?”

He didn’t answer.

“Do you and Clara talk about me a lot?” I asked, suddenly feeling insecure.

“Only good things, don’t worry.” He finally answered with a small smile.

My ipod suddenly made a bleep sound. I sighed in disappointment when I realized the battery is about to run out. I left my charger on board the Tardis and the Tardis was nowhere in sight.

The Doctor pulled his sonic screwdriver. He made a new one. He pointed the sonic to my ipod. “There now, it’s fully charged.” He said.

I smiled at him gratefully. “Thank you, Doctor.”

We sat still as we share music together on that stairs.

7777

I watched as the Doctor was asked by the children to tell them a story and being the kind man he is, he can hardly refused them. I watched in amusement as the Doctor dramatically tell a story that made the children giggling. There was a lot of whirling on the Doctor’s part. It was funny.

I noticed Adam didn’t enjoy the story as much as the other children. I sat with him and asked him how he was doing.

“He is deliberately being silly.” Adam said.

“He is a silly man.” I said.

“I don’t like it.”

“Because he was supposed to be cool?” I asked.

“Well, yeah, he is a hero that defends the town but look at him, playing with kids.”

“What’s wrong with playing with kids?”

“He’s an adult. It’s weird.”

“I don’t think it’s weird.”

“Well, yeah, that’s because you like ‘like’ him.”

I was surprised that he noticed my feeling for the Doctor and I felt so embarrassed that even a kid noticed it. Was I that transparent? “It wasn’t like that. We are just friend.” I quickly said.

Adam gave me a look that said I was a terrible liar.

I decided to change the subject. “Well then, do you have anything you would rather do? I could join you, if you like.”

Adam’s face brightened at that. He grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the Doctor and the other children.

7777

I met a man called John. He was a soldier. He was assigned to help the Doctor to keep the peace. Lately, he has been coming to see me a lot. Laura said that he was courting me. I didn’t believe it but I was begining to believe that it was true. I have no idea what to do. I tried to let him down gently.

To my annoyance, even John noticed that that I have feeling for the Doctor. “He can’t ever love you as I do. I can give you a life that you deserve.” He said.

Even if he was right, I couldn’t love him back. John told me he talked to the Doctor and asked his permission to court me and he gave him the go ahead. I felt like I was being slapped.

The Doctor actually gave him permission to court me? He wasn’t even my guardian. But, in a way, he was, wasn’t he? But, what about his confession earlier, about choosing me back? Was that a lie? Did he retract that because I said I didn’t believe him?

My heart ached so badly. I wanted to cry. I begged John to give me some space. I left him and went into the lake.

“Are you okay, miss (name)?” Adam asked.

I was surprised to see him there. I quickly wiped my tears and put on a small smile. “I’m fine. My eyes are just hurting a bit.”

“Do adult believe in that sort of rubbish excuse?” He asked.

I chuckled at that and I messed his hair up.

“Don’t treat me like a kid.” Adam pushed my hand away in annoyance.

7777

I was mad at the Doctor. I foolishly accepted John who asked me to have a dance with him during a festive in town. I wanted the Doctor to be jealous. But, of course, he didn’t blink an eye as I danced and talked with John.

It was unfair of me to stringing John along. I confessed to him that I was still in love with the Doctor. He said he knew and he was fine with it. He begged me to get to know him too. He hope to open my eyes and let me see his genuine love for me.

Life would be so much easier if you liked the right people. For me, John could have been that person. The Doctor, as amazing as he is, was out of my league. On top of that, he was immortal and he aged very slowly. I was only human, after all, can’t help feeling about my own vanity. We could never be together, could we? Ugh, I was horrible.

I tried to give John a chance. I tried. But my heart still beats for the Doctor. After a month of courting, I told John that he should no longer waste his time courting me and that if he like, I would like to remain friend with him.

John was upset. He left without saying anything. I regretted that it was our last meeting. John died during one of the attack in town that same night. I felt guilty and I grieved for him.

7777

I was with the Doctor in the tower. We sat together in the balcony, watching the moon.

“Why did you give John permission to court me?” I asked suddenly, surprising him.

“I thought it was obvious. You deserve a normal life with a man who can grow old with you.”

I guess, the Doctor worried about vanity too. I nodded. “He would be perfect. He was a good man.”

The Doctor nodded and muttered something along the line “...despite being a soldier...”

I sighed as I pulled my blanket closer around me. “But I wish you didn’t do that.” I said. “It made me think about how little you must think about my feeling for you.”

“It wasn’t like that.” The Doctor quickly said. “I just want you to be happy.”

“You told me before that you were choosing me back, was that a lie?”

“It wasn’t a lie. But I’m an old man, (name), I don’t deserve you. You deserve better than me.” The Doctor said. “I was very jealous seeing you dance with John. I knew you did that on purpose to try to get me to react.”

“You noticed that, huh?”

“Oh believe me, I have to restrain myself from pulling you from him and kiss you right then and there...” He said. “But I can’t be selfish with you.”

“What if I want you to be selfish?” I asked. “What if I want to spend the rest of my life loving you and be loved back in return by you?”

“It certainly will be a challenge.” The Doctor said. “But, you have to be sure that this is what you really want, (name). I am a Time Lord. When we loved someone, we loved so completely to the point almost obsession. You need to be absolutely sure you want this because...I don’t think I could let you go should we go through with this.”

I moved closer to the Doctor and put one hand over his cheek. “I choose you, my Doctor.”

The Doctor smiled solemnly as he put his hand over mine. “As you wish, my dearest (name).”

7777

True to his words, he started showing his affection for me. He started with romantic gestures like a candlelight dinner, a dance with my favorite song played on speaker (yes, that’s right, he made a speaker so that I could connect it to my ipod) and just overall being amazing boyfriend.

He taught me how to use his sonic screwdriver. “Just point and think.” He said standing real close behind me. His arms enveloped me as he helped me point the sonic to the correct target.

“What? Just like that? When you put it like that, it sounded like the sonic is a magic wand.” I said teasingly.

He pouted adorably.

7777

I was happy being with the Doctor. I tried not to think about the future, to just live in the moment. Then something bad happened. Something that I didn’t even see coming. I didn’t even think the Doctor suspect it. The town was under attack and I was looking for Adam. He was nowhere to be found. His parents were worried. I went to the lake with the sonic the Doctor gave me for protection. I thought he would be there. I was hoping not to stumble with any of the Doctor’s enemies here.

But what I saw...is horrible. I saw something I shouldn’t. I can’t comprehend what it is I was seeing. I had to go back and tell the Doctor about it. But, I made a sound unintentionally and he found me.

He was fast and strong for a kid.

I fell to the ground and he descend upon me with a hammer. “Adam, don’t!”

Adam smiled coldly at me. “You saw it, didn’t you? That’s too bad. I really really like you, miss (name). But now you have to go.”

I yelped as he pulled his hammer over my head. Sharp pain filled my head as blood trailing down the side of my face. I felt dizzy. The sonic fell to the ground, covered in my blood.

Adam picked it up. “I will tell him that you were killed. This thing will be the evidence.”

I was horrified. This kid was actually planning to kill me for real?

“It was easy, you see. Everyone trust a kid, even the Doctor. Even John... Others children are easy to manipulated too...”

My eyes widened at the mention of John. “You killed John? Why?”

“You like him too much.” He said. “I know you like the Doctor too. But I can’t kill the Doctor. We need him. But, I suppose this way is better. No one gets to have you now. I’m sorry that it has come to this. I really like you ever since you saved me from the lake.”

Of course, only me would have a psycho kid as an admirer. Any other companion of the Doctor would probably die by another alien hand while I got a psycho kid instead.

I tried to move away but I was too weak. The headache is getting worse. I can barely think.

“I’m sorry, miss (name).” Adam said, sounding genuinely upset even with that chilling smile on his face.

“That’s enough.”

I heard someone said. I didn’t recognize who it was. I think it was a man dressed in black?

The man walked toward Adam and grabbed the kid before he could do so much as screaming. He put his hands over the kids’ temples. Adam stopped struggling. The man then shushed the kid away. He walked toward me.

“900 years of wondering what exactly happened to you. Which of my enemies got to you. And it was just some crazy kid?” He lamented in disbelief.

I tried to focus to stay awake but it was getting hard. “Who…?”

The man bends his knees right beside me. He pulled a sonic screwdriver. Was it mine? I can’t tell. “Don’t move.”

I succumbed to the darkness gratefully.

7777

I woke up in a med bay. I recognized it as the med bay on board of the Tardis.

“Ah, you are finally awake.”

I saw the man from before. I didn’t know who he is. “Who are you? Where is the Doctor?”

The man raised an eyebrow at me. “I’m the Doctor.”

My jaw dropped in disbelief. “No, you are not the Doctor.”

“I regenerated.”

“See, that was a lie. My Doctor told me he was in his last regeneration. You can’t be him. What game are you trying to play here?”

“No game. I got a new set of regeneration. You can thank your best friend for that.”

I blinked. “Clara? Clara is here too? Where?”

“I kind of left her with Vastra and Jenny. No worry, we can come back for her later.”

“Are you really the Doctor?” I asked tentatively.

“Yes.”

“How? You said… How did Clara…?”

“Near the end of my times, I was dying; Clara returned with the Tardis and she convinced the other Time Lords to help me. And here we are.”

“You said on the lake that it has been 900 years…” I whispered. “Did I die?”

“Obviously not, you are here, aren’t you?”

“But you said you have been wondering what happened to me. Did you…crossing your own time stream to save me?”

“Don’t talk about thing that you don’t understand.”

“Well then, explain to me.”

“I don’t think your pudding brain could comprehend it.”

I was very offended. “You are rude.”

The Doctor shrugged as if he didn’t care.

“What did you do to Adam?” I asked.

“Does it matter?”

“I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t care. Now answer the question.”

“I told him to go be useful somewhere else.”

“What is that supposed to mean? Did you harm him?”

“Why do you care? He tried to kill you.”

“He’s just a kid.”

“One who has a taste for murder? Greta? John? Ring a bell?”

“He needs help.”

“Oh, don’t worry; I give him exactly what he need.” The Doctor said with a dark tone.

I shivered under his gaze. I started wondering if this man really is the Doctor.

7777

I was so excited to see Clara again. I was about to approach her but she was talking with the Doctor on the console room. She looked sad. I heard the end of what the Doctor said to her.

“I’m not your boyfriend.”

“I never thought you were.”

“I didn’t say it was your mistake.”

My heart ached suddenly. Did that mean the Doctor used to consider Clara his girlfriend? I wanted to hit myself. Why am I still surprise with it? I knew that he has feeling for Clara despite his claim back then of choosing me. Maybe he meant he settle for me. I sighed as I wiped my glassy eyes.

They were still unaware of my presence. They talked about things that I seemed to miss. Something about an ad in a newspaper and a phone number.

I finally made my presence known.

Clara actually look a bit alarmed to see me. I saw her exchanged a look with the Doctor.

The Doctor only shrugged.

Clara went to hug me and I hugged her back tightly.

“I miss you so much, Clara.” I said.

“I miss you more.” Clara said.

The Doctor watched the two of us with a smile. “So, where to next?”

I was surprised when Clara said she want to go home. I sensed something was up between the Doctor and Clara, something that I missed.

Clara asked me if I want to go home with her and I was just speechless.

The Doctor glanced at me without a word.

“I think I will stay for a while. I need to talk with the Doctor.” I said finally as I glanced back at him.

Clara stared at the two of us before nodded. “I will give you some space.” She went out of the Tardis just as her phone rangs.

I turned to the Doctor. I seated myself on the stairs. “So, are you going to give me the same speech, more or less, about how you are not my boyfriend?”

He raised an eyebrow at that. “Do you want me too?”

“I’m giving you an out, Doctor. I knew you only settle for me because Clara was not with us back in Trenzalore.”

“Maybe you are the one in need of an out. Didn’t like my new face, eh? Too old for you?”

I glared at him. “That’s not fair. Do you really think me so little?”

“You can’t even look at me and see me as the Doctor.”

“Well, forgive me for being a human! I’m not used yet to the new grumpy face. Also this you are rude.”

“I saved you and I was rude?”

“You called me pudding brain!”

“I called everyone pudding brain. Don’t take it personally.”

I glared at him.

“I meant every words back in Trenzalore. You wanted this. I did warn you I won’t be easily letting you go and what was that you said to me back then?”

I was silent for a few seconds. “I choose you, my Doctor.” I repeated my words to him back then.

“And, do you still meant every words?”

“I...Of course. Yes.”

“You don’t sound sure.”

I couldn’t say anything.

“I see. You prefer the other face more.”

“That’s not it! I just need time to get used to this new you. Is that too much to ask?”

“Fine. I will give you time.” He said with a huff as he moved to get out of the Tardis and I could hear him talking to Clara outside.

Seemed like Clara is having a hard time accepting the new doctor like me. But, it seemed like he managed to convince her. When I got out of the Tardis, Clara waved me over to join them for chips.

7777

I have to sort out my life outside of the Tardis. I lost my job at the diner just yesterday. The Doctor showed up at my work place, basically insulting me and everyone who worked there. I was angry at the Doctor for calling my job as a dead end job, no matter whether he was right or not.

Clara was lucky she got a position as a teacher at a high school. Clara has always the brave out of the two of us. I was content hiding away and be invicible. Clara would never be satisfied with that. She loves being in the spotlight, much like the Doctor. It was a miracle that the two of them actually put up with me.

Clara did get me a job at administration department at the high school she teaches eventually. It wasn’t that bad, thanfully. She introduced me to Danny Pink, a teacher. She told me that she was seeing him. I was very happy for her. Danny looked like a good man.

The Doctor and Clara often went on adventures non-stop. I didn’t know how she can cope balancing Tardis life and real life. I, myself, has turned down the Doctor a few times whenever he asked me to go with him and Clara.

“I’m so tired, Doctor. Tomorrow I have work. I need to sleep.”

“You can sleep when you die.”

I ignored him after he said that.

7777

One day, the Doctor showed up on my doorsteps with a suit and asked me out on a date.

“You are absolutely sure I am going to say yes...” I said as I gestured on his suit.

Of course, his answer kind of ruined the mood. He was too blunt sometimes. But, you have got to admit, he grew on you, especially his angry eyebrows as Clara dubbed it.

Surprisingly, the Doctor set up a good date night. He took me out on a restaurant in some planet. The song that played in the background to my surprise was my favorite song, the one we danced to back in the tower on Trenzalore.

“You remember.” I whispered with a smile.

He only shrugged. He raised a hand toward me and asked me to dance with him.

I smiled widely and accepted. He didn’t smile the whole time but I could see his eyes softened considerably as he glanced at me fondly.

At the end of the night, he gave me a present, sort of, my old ipod.

“I had to give it a bit of upgrade and I took the liberty to add more music for your collection.” He said. “But you can’t let others borrow it since it contain song from the future.”

I held the ipod on my chest and smiled gratefully at him. “Thank you, Doctor.” I kissed his cheek.

7777

Clara said she wanted to meet Robin Hood. Oh, I know that Robin Hood was one of her favorite stories.

The Doctor reluctantly took us to go see Robin Hood. He kept insisting that Robin Hood is not real though.

Clara and I was excited to dress ourselves in a period-appropriate dress. We complimented each other much to the Doctor’s annoyance.

“Stop admiring yourself. Do you want to see Robin Hood or not?” He asked grumpily.

Clara grinned as she made me do a twirl before pushing me right into the Doctor’s arms.

The Doctor caught me in his embrace. He gazed at me but didn’t say anything.

Clara smirked. “Now, who is admiring who?”

The Doctor glared at Clara as I blushed.

7777

Clara and I were surprised to see the Doctor undercover at the school where we worked as the caretaker.

The Doctor found out about Danny Pink and was livid because Clara is dating a former soldier.

“John is a soldier and you let him court me.” I reminded him.

“That’s different.”

I rolled my eyes. I tried not to think too much about what he meant. I didn’t want to allow insecurity take a bite on me again. Not today, at least.

Clara introduced Danny to the Doctor and they both have instant dislike of each other.

7777

During on our girl night out, I finally get to ask Clara about Trenzalore and about the last moment of our first Doctor. Well, my first. Clara has seen and interacted in some way with all of the Doctor’s incarnation through her echoes.

She told me that she was once even a Time Lady and that she was the one who introduced the Doctor with the Tardis.

I smiled at that. The Tardis actually owed Clara for directing the Doctor to steal the right ‘sexy’ Tardis. It was kind of funny considering how the Tardis has been treating Clara before. The Tardis was very mean to Clara but now it seemed they get on well.

Clara told me about the Doctor sending her away twice. She told me about the Doctor being very old and weak and alone. She told me about how the Doctor apologized to her for not protecting me, her best friend.

I wanted to cry at the thought that I caused him so much pain by staying in the Trenzalore back then. He thought I was dead and he never stopped wondering about what happened to me. He cared so much that 900 years later, after he regenerated, he risked everything to rescue me.

I know everything worked out well. The Doctor is here. Clara is here. We are all together. I supposed it was better this way. If Adam had not attacked me, I would have stay with the Doctor until my time is running out and he would have to bury me. I knew it was inevitable. I would die sooner or later but later is definitely better.

I suddenly have the urge to see the Doctor so I apologized to Clara for cutting our girl night short. She only grinned at me in understanding.

I called the Doctor, hoping he would accept my call and came to me immediately. Thankfully, he did. As the Tardis materialized in front of me, I ran and pulled the door open. I stared at the Doctor for a short a while and immediately went to hug him, despite his protest that he is not a hugging person anymore.

“I love you, my Doctor.” I whispered to him.

The Doctor’s eyes widened and softened considerably. He didn’t say it back but at the times, it didn’t matter to me.

7777

A Time Lord, basically an alien immortal and a human; our relationship are basically very fragile. I could die any times, be it by the hands of another alien or another human, be it accidentaly or intentionally. Though, I never thought it will happen so soon. But then again, it shouldn’t surprise me so much. Life with the Doctor could be wonderful but also dangerous. The Doctor did always find himself in a life or death situation most of the times.

We got involved in an adventure with the Vikings where we met Ashildr. The villagers are under attack by unknown entity but the Doctor eventually recognize them as the Mire. Ashildr declared wars on the Mire and the Doctor was forced to act accordingly to defend the villagers.

I didn’t actually remember what happened to me. It was very hazy. According to Clara, I was injured gravely in a line of fire during the Mire’s unexpected attack. The Doctor used Mire technology to save my life and Ashildr, sentencing the both of us to a life of immortality, not that I was aware of it at the time.

Originally, the Doctor planned to gave both chips to Ashildr but I was dying and he decided to save me...again. Partly, it was because Clara begged him to save her best friend.

I was in and out of conciousness for a few days on board of the Tardis and when I finally regained my bearing, it was to the worried face of Clara.

Clara exhaled a sigh of relief when she saw me awaken. “Don’t ever do that again.” She said as she hugged me tight.

I was still very weak but I smiled regardless. “You are one to talk. Between the two of us, you are the one who is more reckless.”

“Yet, I’m not the one in the med bay.” She pointed.

I noticed the Doctor leaned against the doorway, staring at the both of us with a look I can’t decipher. I smiled at him. “Thank you for saving my life again, Doctor.”

“Don’t thank me. You might end up cursing me instead.” The Doctor bluntly said.

I frowned.

Clara glared at the Doctor. “He has been grumpy this few days. Don’t mind him.”

I stared at those two in confusion but honestly I was still too tired to deal with whatever issue the Doctor have with me. I imagined the Doctor was upset with me for not being careful.

7777

The Doctor dropped me back on Earth to rest. It was then the world was shaken by a broadcast from the moon. I recognized Clara’s voice. Something about deciding the fate of the moon? I wonder where the Doctor is and why he is letting the people of earth to make the decision.

I called Clara but she didn’t pick up. It was the next day she asked to meet me and she told me she intend to leave the Tardis for good. She told me she was angry at the Doctor. I was confused with the Doctor’s action toward Clara and I can only pray they both could work out their issue. I would hate for our relationship to break over this.

Clara asked me if I think the Doctor is too cold-hearted ever since he regenerated. I ponder over Adam and what he said about giving him exactly what he deserved, not that I know exactly what it was. That moment made me doubted the Doctor but I convinced myself he was just being protective of me so I never mention it again. I didn’t agree with Clara but I didn’t exactly defend the Doctor either.

Clara and the Doctor had a plan for a one last hurray trip. I figured I should not come and give them their space to work their issue with each other. It seemed to work because after that trip, Clara said she will stick around to travel in the Tardis. But she told me she promised Danny she will stop travelling with the Doctor. She had to lie and she made me swore not to tell Danny either.

7777

Clara and I couldn’t help but laugh at the Doctor’s predicament, having being trapped inside the Tardis that had shrunk down to a handheld size.

I couldn’t help giggling at Clara’s antic of acting as ‘Doctor Clara’ taking charge to deal with the current alien invasion. Clara, loving to be in charge, flirted with me as a joke at the Doctor’s expense. The Doctor rolled his eyes at the both of us and shouted to focus.

7777

The forest has grown all over the world. The Doctor believed that this is the end of the world. A giant solar headed toward the earth.

The Doctor offered an escape via the Tardis. Clara refused because she didn’t want to be the last human. I didn’t want to leave the Doctor but I also didn’t want to be the last human either or to leave Clara to her death alone.

It was then I noticed the Doctor and Clara exchanged a look again.

“You were right, Doctor. We shouldn’t keep the truth from her.” Clara said. “(name), you should stay with the Doctor.”

“What? Why?”

That’s when they told me about my immortality, thanks to the Mire technology. I was stunned and I was upset that they didn’t tell me the truth immediately. Now, I understand what the Doctor said before about me cursing him instead of thanking him.

But, there is no time for breakdown. The Doctor was able to figure out that the trees are defending the earth from the solar attack.

I left the Doctor and Clara to be on my own, contemplating the meaning of my new existence.

“So, they finally tell you the truth then?” Someone said.

I glanced up and my eyes widened in surprise when I saw the woman. “Ashildr?”

“Call me ‘Me’.” She said.

We left Ashildr back in the distant past. The fact that she was here confirmed that she was immortal and I shared her fate. I didn’t know how to feel about that.

Me took me to a nearby cafe and ordered tea for the both of us. I sensed that she has resentment toward the Doctor and me.

“Well, you are the only immortal the Doctor seemed to care enough to take with him, unlike myself...or Jack Harkness.” She replied when I asked her about it.

I have no idea who Jack Harkness is but Me explained that Jack is the Doctor’s former companion.

Me told me about her life. She told me about her immortal life so far. She had lost many memories over the long years. She collected journal after journal to write down about her life because she found difficulty holding on her many memories.

I shuddered at the thought that my life is extended indefinetely.

Me gave her phone number and told me to contact her if I want to and then she left me behind.

I didn’t know what to say to the Doctor and Clara so I decided I didn’t want to talk about it. I didn’t tell them about meeting Me.

Clara apologized for holding the truth from me. The Doctor, as usual, didn’t say anything.

I didn’t know what this meant for my relationship with the Doctor though. Being immortal meant I could stay with the Doctor forever but will our relationship even last forever? What if someday he fall out of love with me? Where would that left me? The thought depressed me so badly.

7777

The Doctor took us to an adventure again and it was just my bad luck that things gone wrong for me...again. I began to feel like the universe is against me or something?

We got stranded on base and naturally a mutating virus was on the loose, infecting people left and right. Of course, I had to be the one who got infected despite being immortal.

Being immortal sucks. The virus got stuck in me. I was in continous state of dying. The Doctor put me on a stasis chamber that will paralyze and put me to sleep while he and Clara worked out the cure by travelling to the distant future.

I was trapped inside the statis chamber for God know how many years. At some point, the stasis chamber got faulty resulting in me getting awaken but paralyzed. I was screaming and begging for help inside my mind, begging the Doctor to come and rescue me but he never did.

It was hard to hold on my sanity. It was a good thing I didn’t feel hunger or thirsty inside the chamber otherwise I feared I would become cannibal and eat myself if that even possible. I can’t even find relief by sleeping. Eventually I was able to move my hand enough to scratch my own face until it bleed, ripped strands of my hairs in a fit of rage. I screamed and cried. Honestly, it was a bliss when miraculously the stasis chamber worked again and put me into sleep.

The next time I was awake, I was no longer on the stasis chamber. I heard familiar voices on the distant. It was the Doctor and Clara arguing about (name) and the stasis chamber. How do I know it was them? It has been so long. My mind might playing a trick on me. I heard them mentioning (name) again.

Oh, (name) is me, right? I opened my eyes and for a while, I couldn’t recognize the surrounding area.

The Doctor and Clara were still unaware that I have awaken. I tried to move my toes and relieved when I realized I could move. I forced myself into a seating position. I took notice of my surrounding. The Tardis, my mind slowly supplied. I got down from the bed and immediately fell into the floor with a loud thud.

They both came into the room and rushed to my aid.

“Are you two...really here? Am I safe now?” I asked in hoarse voice.

Clara looked like she wanted to cry and she hugged me immediately. “I’m so sorry, (name).”

The Doctor glanced at me, for once, I could see that the genuine concern in his expression.

7777

I thought I would get better but I kept having nightmare about being back in the stasis chamber. I would scream so loud and started ripping my hairs off or clawing my skins. The Doctor had to give me sedative and restrained me to bed to stop me from hurting myself and Clara.

The Doctor dropped Clara back on Earth so he can focused on fixing my mind. He asked for my consent to get inside my mind when I was in a better mood. I agreed. I wanted to be able to function again. I didn’t want to hurt myself or Clara or even the Doctor.

He put his hands over my temple and told me to take a deep calm breathe. He put some block over the troublesome memory and hope it would do the trick for my sanity.

Once he deemed me safe, he let me out of the Tardis. I decided to quit my job at the school where Clara teaches. I didn’t want to see the worry or pity in her eyes. I tried to sort my life back together. I got myself a job as a waitress again. Thankfully, the Doctor didn’t make the mistake of calling it a dead end job again otherwise I might slap him silly.

At Clara’s urge, I took an art class as part of therapy.

Despite the block the Doctor put inside my mind, I still have nightmare about the stasis chamber, at least I didn’t go bat crazy about it afterward.

I called Me’s phone number but then I decided to hang up. But the next day, Me showed up on the diner where I worked much to my surprise. She said she recognized my number. I apologized for bothering her.

She insisted I talk to her though so I did.

7777

Lately, the Doctor insisted to have adventure with just the two of us. He made sure it was safe though. I could tell he was worried for me.

I found out that Danny died. I went to Clara’s house to comfort her. She was numb and unresponsive. I called the Doctor to inform him about Clara.

Clara said she need to talk alone with the Doctor and asked me to step back for a bit. Albeit confused, I did as she asked.

Next thing I knew, the world is suddenly overun by cybermen. Kate, from UNIT, picked me up and I was able to reunite with the Doctor. Kate said the Doctor has been chosen as the President of Earth. She also informed me that the Doctor’s enemy, Mistress or Missy, was on board the plane too. But Clara was nowhere to be found. I was very worried.

I met Missy and she curiously observed me. Then, she proceed to mock me as the Doctor’s eternal pet. The Doctor told me to ignore her. But, she knew things and she knew my insecurity regarding the Doctor and Clara. She told me that the first face an incarnation first took sight to was dear to a Time Lord and she knew that I was not his first face, that Clara is. She knew I was not the Doctor’s first choice on anything. The words hurt but I knew it was true.

The Doctor heard every words she said to me but he didn’t even bother to reassure me otherwise. I can’t blame him though. He was busy thinking about how to save the world again. He has no time to coddle me.

The Doctor saved the world again. Clara stopped travelling with the Doctor. I wanted to hit the both of them in the head for being stupid. They lied to each other and they turned to me and made swore up and down not to reveal anything. Stupid Doctor. Stupid Clara.

I continued to travel with the Doctor. I was working on the courage to talk to him about my immortality and what it meant for our relationship. But, I was a coward and it didn’t help that the Doctor might actually avoiding the subject too.

I was glad when Clara returned to travel with the Doctor again. Apparently, they had finally told each other truth, thanks to the dream crabs and...Santa Claus? Whatever. I was just grateful team Tardis is back.

7777

Clara has become reckless and I reprimanded her about it.

“What’s the point of being immortal if you won’t live a little?” Clara blurted out.

I frowned at that, feeling a bit offended. I was beginning to feel like I wasn’t quite as welcomed aboard the Tardis as before. The Doctor has not even taking me to another date since forever and I still haven’t got around to talk to him about our practically non-existent relationship.

I sighed. Maybe I was a bit too sensitive about everything? Missy’s words did bother me a lot. But Clara is my best friend. The Doctor, regardless whether he is my boyfriend or not, is actually a good friend. I should be grateful that they still want me around right?

But, Clara is right though. I was now an immortal. Shouldn’t I change the way I have been living my life? I should stop being timid and like she said to try to take more risks.

Just when I was considering to change myself to fit the Doctor and Clara better, if that even possible, something bad happened. We met Me again in a Trap Street and Clara accidentally sealed her own fate with the Raven. She died.

She was brave right up till the end. She said goodbye to the Doctor and myself. I couldn’t accept that my best friend is about to die. I begged the Doctor to fix it. But, when I saw the sorrow and resignation on his face, I knew there is no saving Clara.

I cried over Clara’s dead body. The Doctor was gone, transported to who know where, by whoever made Me to set a trap for him.

The Doctor didn’t come back for me. Of course, he wouldn’t. I was bitter. He finally got an out from me.

7777

I was depressed, sad and alone. I couldn’t go to Me because I still have mixed feeling for her part in killing Clara. I was afraid of facing my immortality alone. Me did warned me that the Doctor, despite being immortal himself, expressed strong dislike of immortals and he tend to avoid them. He told her other immortals felt wrong to him. I was angry at him for sentencing me to a life of immortality and then abandoned me.

Kate contacted me and invited me to join UNIT. I accepted. She had her best soldier to train me to fight. I was in so much pain and I welcomed the physical pain of the training. Though, I suck at training but I was determined to change myself. If I have to going through my immortality alone, I might as well started training myself to fight to protect myself.

I was surprised when Clara returned with her own Tardis. She said she was worried for me. She was with Me, a future Me, apparently. She warned Clara about myself and the path I had chosen for myself. Clara told me about the Doctor being trapped in confession dial for billion billion years, about how he risked all time and space to bring Clara back and about how he loses his memory of her.

Clara begged me to travel with the Doctor again. “He need you more than ever...”

I wanted to cry. I didn’t want to go back to the Doctor and facing the truth that he never loves me. I wanted to be with my best friend, travelling back to the Gallifrey the long way but she refused me. I wanted to tell her all of my insecuries but I was afraid she already grew tired of it and will mock me for it.

Clara firmly made me sit. “Tell me everything you feel inside that mind of yours.” She said.

And, I told her everything. I told her about what Missy said to me and about the Doctor not caring about it. I knew I sounded pathetic but I tell her anyway.

After I was done pouring my heart out, I asked her if I was a right fit to be his companion. “Wouldn’t it better to let him move on and find a better companion that can keep him in line? Because I certainly couldn’t.”

Clara said the right words to make me feel special but I knew deep down I didn’t believe her every word. She made me promise to travel with the Doctor again and I promised. She left afterward.

I lied to her. I didn’t seek the Doctor. Why would I when he didn’t even care enough to seek me out? He might not remember Clara but he should remember me. If he care for me, he would at least try to find me to console me, wouldn’t he?

I had hope though days after days hoping he would come and get me. He didn’t. I cried, feeling sorry for myself, hating him, wishing for him to let me die instead of turning me into immortal. And then, I tried to contact him to get him to see me when I was drunk out of my mind. But he didn’t come. He abandoned me.

I went insane for a while. I picked up a knife and slit my wrist only to watch it self-healing over and over again. Kate found me eventually and took me to UNIT for treatment. She got me a therapy to help deal with my depression.

7777

After years of hard training, Kate finally allowed me on field mission. I had the advantage since I was immortal so I asked to be given dangerous mission. Kate, at first, reluctant because she recognized me of being suicidal but I insisted on it.

Kate’s science division genius person, O, developed a chip implant that could help with my depression. She agreed to give mission if I agreed to wear it. I accepted immediately.

“Will this help to mend a broken heart and broken mind? Because that would be super great.” I said softly.

After the implant, I felt less sad, less suicidal and more focused on my work at UNIT. It was like my own humanity switch.

7777

I met the Doctor again, accidentaly, during a mission in Sheffield. I was ordered to investigate a possible alien activity over there.

I enlisted a PC, Yazmin Khan, to inform me should she see something strange. She called me later that day about weird alien thing that her friend, Ryan, found earlier. The lead from them led me to the train where Ryan’s grandmother, Grace and her husband, Graham, currently trapped on board a train with an orb of electric tentacles.

That’s when a woman fell from the sky onto the train right in front of me. My eyes widened as I saw the weird stranger. The way she acted though made me suspicious and when she exclaimed having being a scotman before, I immediately knew. I was hit suddenly with grief and anger. But I didn’t say anything because she didn’t even recognize me. She didn’t even know her own name. I was afraid that I would lose control and bitch-slap the Doctor in a fit of my rage.

The Doctor involved all of us in her investigation. I stepped back while she rambled non-stop about the alien. I contacted UNIT and asked Kate to send another agent to deal with the alien and the Doctor. I didn’t give her time to refuse me. I walked away from the warehouse where we currently are when Yaz stopped me. She said the Doctor told her that everyone has been implanted by an explosive chip implant.

I laughed harshly at that. “Well, that’s fine. Maybe I will die for real this time.” I said angrily. “UNIT is sending their best officer to help in dealing with the alien. I have to go.”

Yaz look confused but didn’t stop me.

7777

Back at UNIT, the science division managed to remove the explosive from me. My whole body is shaking with anger and grief. I raised my trembling hands in annoyance. I hated that the Doctor had this effect on me. I hated her already.

Kate, being the nice boss she is, asked me of how I was doing. I was doing so badly that’s for sure.

“I need an upgrade for my chip.” I said.

Kate stared at me with disapproval.

“I’m afraid if I see her again, I might want to kill the Doctor, Kate.” I said. “Please help me.”

7777

The Tardis materialized inside UNIT’s headquarter without warning much to Kate’s dismay.

The Doctor came out, demanding to see me. It was almost like she think UNIT will get in the way of meeting me.

I stared at her, not impressed.

Kate glanced at the two of us and told us to use her office to have a long due talk.

The Doctor looked timid now that we are alone. “I’m sorry for not recognizing you before. Mind still rebooting you know. Regeneration...” She rambled on. “I remember myself eventually...and of you...”

I didn’t reply to her statement, instead I asked, “Why are you here, Doctor?”

“So, you do know who I am that day? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Why should I?”

The Doctor’s jaw dropped. Now she looked like a kicked puppy. “I’m sorry for what I did to you. I didn’t mean to left you behind.”

I sighed. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“It matter to me! I know I wronged you, (name).”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, Doctor, because I have made a life, a life without you.” I spat. I wanted to be calm but she brought out the most ugly emotion in me.

She flinched at my tone. She scoffed at what I said. “With UNIT? I hacked your file and you have been reckless, risking your life...”

“YOU HAVE BEEN HACKING MY FILES?!”

The Doctor took a step back in face of my anger.

“You have no right to do that! You don’t even get a say over what I am doing with my life!” I yelled.

“You are my responsibility, (name).”

I scoffed. “Is that all I am to you?”

“I know I let you down.”

“You abandoned me.” I said. “Now, that I have manage to take whatever control I have over my life, you think you can just come in here and what? What do you expect from me this time, Doctor?”

“I want you to come back. I would like to travel again with you.”

“Why? Didn’t you already find new companion? I knew about Yaz, Ryan and Graham, Doctor.”

“Of course you know. UNIT always have to collect data about me.” The Doctor muttered. “But this isn’t about them. It’s about you.”

I shook my head. “It was never about me, Doctor.”

“I know I hurt you, please let me fix my mistake.”

“So now I am a mistake?”

The Doctor groaned. “That’s not what I meant. Stop twisting my words.”

“I don’t want to be with you anymore. You already had an out. Why do you bother with me again?”

“I never wanted an out. I didn’t mean to abandon you. After Trap Street, I...”

“I knew what happened, Doctor. Clara told me about your confession dial and about how you lost your memory of her.”

“I got it back. My memory of Clara.”

“Of course you do.”

The Doctor sighed. “You have always so insecure, (name).”

I glared at her. “Just leave, Doctor. I don’t need you anymore.”

“But I do.” The Doctor replied. “I need you, (name).”

“No, you don’t.”

“Yes, I do. And stop dictating my feeling for you. You always like this. What was it you said before? I settled for you instead of Clara?”

I felt like I got slapped. I remembered saying those words to her previous incarnation. “How dare you? You come here like you own the place and then decided on a whim to hurt me?”

“That’s not my intention at all.” The Doctor said. “I know I am not reliable with my feeling but what I said back in Trenzalore still true, every words. I choose you, (name).”

“Why are you doing this to me? Do you just enjoy ripping my heart out?” I asked with glassy eyes.

The Doctor walked fast toward me. She raised my chin and kissed me hard.

I was stunned.

She broke the kiss and look at me shyly. “Will you give me another chance? I promise I will do right by you.”

I broke down. “Doctor...” And I suddenly clutched my chest.

“(name)?” The Doctor called out in worry.

I fell to the ground immediately but she caught me halfway. She yelled for help. She pulled her sonic and started scanning me.

Kate and a few agents rushed into the office.

7777

There was a glitch inside my chip implant. The overwhelming emotion I felt was too much and it caused it to glitch and rebooted.

I woke up in the medical room at UNIT. I could hear the Doctor yelling at Kate about the chip implant she put on me and how dangerous it was.

I pulled myself into a seating position and observed their argument absentmindedly.

The Doctor stopped yelling when she saw me awake. She look into my eyes and saw the indifferent that reflected back in my eyes. She slumped her shoulder.

The chip had rid me of my feeling...for the Doctor.

A/N: I don’t know if there will be part 2 of this. Maybe if inspiration hit, I will. But maybe it ended exactly like that. Not everyone get a happy ending is a theme on most of my fanfiction. Would anyone be interested instead to make the part 2 of their own? Honestly, I write this story with a dark!doctor in mind but the story suddenly got away from me and make a turn to this instead.

#11th doctor x reader #12th doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #eleventh doctor x reader #twelfth doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor who fanfiction #doctor who imagine #shiefenwrites

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