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#and now I feel more energized
bobfloydsbabe · 26 days
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Who was gonna tell that going to bed at a reasonable time is good for your mental health? Huh? Gatekeeping is not cool, y’all.
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revasserium · 2 months
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A request for the prompt "Stolen kisses" + Zayne!! Thank you so much :D
also I love your writing SOO much <3
prompt list reqs are: temporarily closed
49. stolen kisses
zayne; 1,720 words; fluff, fem!reader, no "y/n", whipped!zayne, implied sex, but still very saucy, zayne is hornee 24/7 and hes not afraid to show it
summary: 3 kisses, some stolen, others willingly given
a/n: i believe in my heart of hearts that zayne is barely keeping it together around the mc
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one. After dinner, when the pair of you are cleaning up and your sleeves rolled up to your elbows, his arms snaking around your waist to pull you back into him as he presses a kiss to your neck before trailing his lips up to your cheek. Your laughter rings through the kitchen, folding around the pair of you like wings. His smile is soft, is radiant, is tender and absolute as he pulls back to regard you with his searching eyes.
“Good dinner?” he asks.
“The best,” you answer, grinning as you trail a finger along his jaw to tangle your fingers in his hair.
“Good…” he breathes the word against your cheek, leaning in, the ends of his bangs tickling the skin of your face. You make to pull back, but his arms loop tighter around your waist, pressing you close, holding you against the solid cool of the marble countertop.
“But we haven’t yet had dessert.”
Heat flushes up your neck and up, up, up till you can feel your face burning, as you blink up at him from beneath your lashes, feigning innocence.
“I didn’t know we had dessert planned on the menu.”
His grin goes sideways, his eyes taking on a darker, more dangerous light.
“It’s not always planned but…” his voice trails off as a tingling shiver races up your spine, “It is always… considered.”
And then, he leans in to kiss you — and he kisses you with a hunger that has nothing to do with the scrumptious meal you’ve just shared and everything to do with the pulsing heat coalescing between your bodies as he lifts you up onto the counter.
He kisses you like he wants to ruin your mouth for all other tastes but him; he kisses you as if he’s already been ruined by the taste of you.
two. It is unprofessional; you know — and so does he — to do this here, with your back pressed against the wood of his office door, his white coat slipping off his shoulders, his glasses nearly knocked askance by the force of this kiss.
You’d always known that just beneath his smooth, tempered glass facade is the kind of roiling heat that makes up the heart of the earth, the kind of passion that licked at the mouths of volcanoes and rends the sky into nothing but a devastation of ashes.
But here, now, the only rending is his fingers pressing into the dip of your waist, the only devastation his tongue as it traces along the inside of your teeth. You hear yourself make a low, wanton noise and feel him react, his fingers tightening impossibly, his mouth ever and ever more demanding.
“Z-Zayne… we —” but the words die on your lips as he drops his to the bare skin of your neck. You can’t help the gasp that tumbles from your mouth, nor the sudden flash of memory — crystal clear and sharp, as if carved from ice — of the night before, when he had sunk his teeth into your bare shoulder and twisted your hair with trembling fists. It had been pain and impossible, improbable passion. All urge and fire, desperation and need.
“Shhh…” Zayne murmurs against your skin, groaning softly as he finds your lips with his own again. And you are helpless all over again. Weak against the burning need of his embrace.
A soft knock shocks both of you from the frenzied passion soaking through your bones, threatening to blot out your good sense entirely. You pull apart, gasping. From the other side of the door comes the muffled voice of a nurse -
“Dr. Zayne? Your next patient is here. Shall I let him in?”
Zayne hisses out another breath before pulling away.
“Yes, just give me five minutes - finishing a report.”
You can't help the amused grin that tugs across your lips as the both of you make to tidy the slight mess you've made.
“So… I'm a report now, am I?”
But Zayne only regards you with a light, challenging look, quirking his brows.
“No.”
You blink, confused. Then Zayne smiles.
“We’re nowhere near finished.”
A fresh wave of heat crests up into your cheeks as you purse your lips, casting your eyes anywhere but Zayne's pleased face.
“Unprofessional,” you accuse, through the word lacks any vehemence, marred by the extensive blush still coloring your cheeks.
Zayne straightens his impeccably pressed white doctor's coat before taking three swift steps into your space, his chest nearly pushing against yours. He reaches out to tilt your chin up towards him and you feel a hitched breath caught like an insect in amber, suspended perfectly between your lungs and your throat.
Slowly, Zayne draws his thumb across the plush of your bottom lip. You feel his breath fanning across it like a wave of summer heat, found at the heart of winter itself.
“Only in front of you.”
He pulls away just as another gentle knock comes at the door, the nurse's voice announcing the arrival of Zayne's next patient. Zayne casts you one last lingering, meaningful look before gently nudging you aside to pull open the door, the vision of a young and promising doctor as he greets his patient with a small smile, the other hand guiding you towards the opened door.
"Don't forget to take your supplements,” he chides in a voice just gentle enough to inform polite company of his fondness for you, but nothing in it would hint at the indiscretions that had been committed only minutes prior.
"Okay,” you say, ducking your head as you brush by the middle- aged man blinking at the pair of you.
"And… see you at home.”
You only manage a nod and a squeak as the nurse chuckles behind her hand and the middle- aged man makes a soft noise of understanding.
three. You are both eighteen, and teetering on the edge of adulthood — though he’s already well on his way to stardom.
“Congrats — on the Starcatcher Award —“ you feel your throat catch around the words, and suddenly, your mouth is dry, your cheeks hot, your fingers twisting behind your back as you rock on the balls of your feet.
Zayne watches you, his expression thoughtfully blank, but his eyes — they’ve always been his tell. You meet them and search them and feel the fire caught behind them. His Evol might be ice, but… his soul has always been something that burns.
“Thanks,” he says, and you can almost taste the unsaid words bubbling just at the back of his throat. You wish he would tell you, but there’s a depthless chasm cut into the air between the pair of you, rough and jagged and —
“Do you know what I received the award for?”
You blink, startled. You purse your lips, looking away. It’d been too painful, too much to look into it, the knowledge of his brilliance always nipping at your heels like an unruly dog. It had pushed you forward, yes, but only out of the fear that if you let up even one single step, he’d race too far ahead and… leave you behind.
“N-no — I haven’t —“
“For my research on congenital heart defects in infants.”
The world slows, tunnels, and tilts around you. Your eyes jerk up to meet his and there — you see it, the blistering heart of all his so-called fire — and you remember suddenly that if it’s cold enough, the body starts to process the sensation as heat. That ice and fire are not so different.
That ice can also burn.
You find your own hands clutched just above where your heart beats inside your chest and you see his eyes flicker down towards them.
“Zayne —“
“I start work at a clinic next week.”
A frown creases at your temple.
“Our first appointment is on Tuesday.”
Your frown deepens.
“What do you —“
“To qualify for the Hunter Program, you need a medical verification of fitness. And… a primary care physician.”
At these last words, his eyes finally cut away. And here, in the dying light of his brand new living room, the sunset turns his glasses opaque for just a second. You’re left blinking in the aftermath of that light, the afterimages will be stained behind your eyelids for hours after — just that look, the firm line of his shoulders, the determined set of his mouth, his jaw, the softness in his fingers as he reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering against the bend of your cheek.
“L-Lying on reports would be a medical malpractice suit waiting to happen,” you say, your voice shaking with either delirium or emotion, you’re not sure which.
Zayne quirks an eyebrow, “I have no plans on lying.”
“But —“ your fingers clench at your chest.
“I’m just… confident in my own skills, that’s all.”
The shadow of a grin twists his lips and he turns back to you, his eyes cast in threads of molten gold.
“Oh… of course,” you let out a soft breath of laughter, toppling back into the sofa and tossing your arm across your eyes. A moment later, you feel the cushions of the sofa sink beside you.
“Hey, look at me.”
You drop your arm and turn, your head still pillowed against the back of the sofa. Zayne’s gaze flickers over every aspect of your face before he reaches out to take your hand in his. Slowly, he leans down to press his lips to your knuckles, letting his lips linger there till you make a soft, questioning noise at the back of your throat.
He looks back up with a knowing smile.
“Shall we get something to eat?”
You jump to your feet, “Y-yes! My treat — a congratulations gift!”
Zayne considers for a moment before sighing, “Alright, but just this once.”
“What, we’re not allowed to go out to dinner now that you’re a certified doctor?”
Zayne’s mouth twitches with amusement as he reaches for his coat.
“No, we’ll still go out for dinner — you’re just no longer allowed to pay for them.”
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saltpepperbeard · 4 months
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:(
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vriendenboekjes · 5 months
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waitt i saw ellian @pendraegon mention the 9 end of year selfies... here are some of mine! let's bring this back!!!?!
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MOTHERFUCK i did not realize how much those antidepressants made me feel physically psychologically and dare i say spiritually like a peat mummy
literally 2 days off them and i've experienced more joy, lucidity, motivation and general good vibes than i did in the whole 2 months i was on them 😭😭
#now granted i did only sleep for 3 hours#but i felt more refreshed and energized today than i ever did when the pills forced me into 8 hours of pseudo-death a night#MY INTERNAL MONOLOGUE IS BACK TO NEVER SHUTTING TF UP#it was practically bones for so long oml#i'm usually annoyingly verbose but i was only able to say like 5 words at a time before i forgot how to end my sentence#yeah i'm prolly gonna lose the rose tinted glasses in a few days when the novelty wears off but for now#it's so nice to feel like myself and not like a lobotomized skinwalker trying to wear my own mannerisms convincingly#(obvsly they help some ppl or they wouldn't be an option to prescribe but GOD they fit my brain chemistry as well as a fork fits an outlet)#<<<<<<I CAN DO THAT AGAIN!!! I MISSED MY STUPID METAPHORS AND MY BAD PUNS AND MY SLIGHTLY OUT OF POCKET JOKES#i was fucking trying but it fundamentally doesn't work if u Try#yoda moment but whatever#yippeee#god did they fucking '''cure''' my ADHD instead of my depression#ok if this is what some ppl's experience of ADHD meds is like then the 'they made me feel like a robot' thing makes a LOT more sense#personally they just make me feel like. yk that one comic abt ADHD with the dog metaphor#yeah amphetamines my beloved let me hold the leash rather than becoming a human dogsled to the whims of my psyche#actually i think i was rather uncharitable to my current dream mask normal pills#i just happened to get mega bitch burnout for 3 months and then spend 2 in the aforementioned peat bog where souls go to die#when not impeded by outside circumstances i think they actually are completely fine#maybe not QUITE as agressively effective as my previous prescription but the ritalin was str8 up harsh#i tried it again for a week and it made my heart beat like it was being powered by a caffienated hamster#but when i used to take it i was already experiencing Real paranoid gerbil anxiety so it just kinda blended in#i only noticed the Severe Health Issue i got bundled as a side effect#and i keep having to remind myself not to go rose-tinted abt how bad it rlly was in retrospect#do i just need to leave a sticky note on my mirror like 'hey dumbass that was NOT a net positive period of ur life'#lexi stfu challenge
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filet-o-feelings · 4 months
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Found this at the dollar store on my lunch break and decided I'm going to have lavender hair again!
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batz · 1 year
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24/7 half asleep
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starryeyedinput · 6 months
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just spent 4hrs cleaning The Pit (read: my room™) and MAN it feels good !!!
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des8pudels8kern · 1 year
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I wanted to go to the pool today, because it’s hot and I do love having a nice swim, drying in the sun, and then sitting in the dappled shade of a tree with a book, but. Idk. It’s been a week. Twice we got news that someone from work died. I’m feeling off and kind of numb right now. Might just sit around and passively consume media all weekend.
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demonsfate · 1 year
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exhausted! nervous! storm anxious!
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I went to an open mic coffee shop tonight to see one of my favorite bands, and at the end of the night they had all of us, band, audience and employees, stand up together and sing We Are The World by Michael Jackson. Apparently it's tradition to all sing something together at the end of the night.
I have never felt closer to any group of strangers.
#it was a coffee shop specifically for open mics#it was so cool#one of my favorite bands will be going on hiatus for three months while the lead singer recovers from oral surgery#tonight was their last performance before then so of course i had to go#the city i live in has such an amazing music scene#i swear every night i could find at least one performance within walking distance of my apartment#at the end when the band finished an employee stood up and said#its tradition at the end of the night for us all to sing together. the way the world is rn... tonight we'll be singing we are the world#we all crowded together so that thy could get us in their livestream#i got to sing with this band that i love and a group of passionate strangers#all doing our best to sing. readig lyrics off of our phones#the end of that song is just repeating the chorus a thousand times so we got creative#idk that was one of my favorite things ever#i have to wake up at 5:15am#im gonna get like four hours of sleep because im a disaster#i took a three hour nap before the open mic. then went there which got me energized. now idk if ill be able to sleep#i hope i will because i have a ten hour shift tomorrow#im going to work more than double the amount of sleep ill get#i feel like thats not good for me#than right after work i have a psych appointment. just 15 minutes so the service can match me with a good psychiatrist#so ill get like 4 hrs of sleep. work 10 hrs. then immediately have a psych appt#i do this like every weekend. go to a concert. wake up four hours later. work 8-10 hours. repeat#how have i not died yet?#and i know im going to keep doing this. i always say 'am i going to remember this concert or sleeping more?'#'whats going to have a better effect on my life? what will make me happier?'#and i really cant argue with that#goodness im sleepy#okay goodnight#love yall. take care of yourselves. have the bsst day ever
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avo-kat · 2 years
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i guess i could make a ko-fi if it comes to it. though i gotta research how it works here in germany with taxes.
i thought about putting out chapters weekly as a webnovel once im near the finish line, because i like that, its fun. but i dont even know if there are places for that.
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sysig · 2 years
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My brain: Nooooo I can’t talk about doodles made two weeks ago that’s so loooonnnnggg agooooo
Also my brain: *happily talks about doodles from six months ago up to tag limit*
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yongseungkim · 2 months
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.
#its been great like not being as interested in social media#but unfortunately for me that means a lot of the anxieties that came with social media have like#infiltrated real life in very real ways and its scary and i dont like it#i dont like thinking like this#these ppl are too precious to me#i try not to act on it but man are the thoughts the exact same no matter what social thing im a part of#like ive never felt truly included in online spaces or just feeling unpopular or like whatever#kinda the odd one out#and even irl it feels that way#the thing is i have good people and good friends in my life#like i know theyre not the problem#its just me and my thoughts that havent literally changed forever and like now its annoying#bc i care about these people and maybe selfishly wanna keep them in my life (?)#although based on my interactions and conversations w them it feels the same for them too yaknow like reciprocated#but i feel like these days my thoughts have really just been making me not the most fun person to be around sometimes#im not acting on them fully but like maybe slightly (?)#the closer i personally feel to people the more hurt i unintentionally get#i have such unrealistic expectations sometimes it feels#and i feel like my few attempts at trying to get closer with certain ppl one on one hasnt always went down well and like#this has to be a two way thing so i cant really blame em but it also hurts idk :(#i just feel like im always doing something wrong bc ppl never seem to like me as much as i like them ?#idk i think its the superficial things too at the end of the day that bother me more than they should#i feel like i wouldnt be missed like i have to always do the reaching out whos reaching out to me :(#there are ppl that do though and im so thankful to them but things like idk#feel like ic ould shut my phone off for a week and not see anyone and just hear from no one#which is fine i guess but it makes me feel very invisible#its been strange i have feelings im trying to reconcile but not sure how to#socializing is so hard so so so hard ive just been almost confused to a frozen amount#and its been harder these days cuz the rose tinted glasses are off like my friends do re energize me yes but i feel a lot of anxiety too#rambles
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ambersky0319 · 8 months
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Maybe if you listened to
you'd feel better
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grapejuiceblu3s · 9 months
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I think everyone and their granny should do pilates. Nothing else works my core to that level or takes away my back pain like pilates. And I loooove the numerous breaks you take in between.
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