#and they're just not gonna get credit for that huh?

[racew1nn3rs]

─ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘷. (𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘴) 🐅

⤷ summary: spain and canada. lando's rizz is negative, mission is failed. plus, mclaren pr is about to fuck shit up 🗣️

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liked by ynusername, zbrownceo, and 42,908 others

mclaren spain you were forgettable at best 😔 on to the next one

18,980 others

user1 y/n don't insult your team on the team account challenge

mclaren is it really an insult if it's true

user2 we got a lando photo but at what cost

user3 lando fans can never win here

mclaren why you would ever choose to be a lando fan to begin with is beyond me

user2 you're so right queen i'm sorry

landonorris DON'T APOLOGIZE WTF

user2 fuck both of y'all honestly

user4 at least mclaren fans can always count on content, even if we can't expect results 😭

user5 lando and y/n in their friendship era, how the fuck did we get here

landonorris you're posting me now? oh you want me so bad 🥴

mclaren sending this to hr immediately

ynusername YOU'RE FIREEEDDDDDDD

user6 damn she logged into both accounts just to make sure he heard her ass 💀 double homicide

user7 oscar fans i can't even tell if we won or lost

user8 we didn't get a face pic but... we didn't get whatever the fuck the 3rd slide is

landonorris guys pLEASE

landonorris i won't post it she says... it's just for me she says

user9 LMAOOOO AND YOU BELIEVED HER???? 🤣 🫵

landonorris going dark, no one call me

user9 was anyone going to anyways 💀

user10 LET HIM GET UPPPP

oscarpiastri i'll pay you 20 dollars if you don't ever do this to me

mclaren 🤝

mclaren i mean you were never the target but now you will be if i don't get my money!!!!

oscarpiastri oh ok

lilyzneimer i have pictures you can you use if you need bb <3

oscarpiastri WHOSE SIDE ARE YOU ON

zbrownceo Very funny Y/n! Keep up the good work 👍

mclaren Thanks boss! (:

landonorris ZAK WHY

user11 zak is so supportive now, wait until he sees her comments 💀

zbrownceo I have seen her comments! Very funny! 👍

user11 blink twice zak, we can help you

maxverstappen1 This is the highlight of my week, thank you Y/n!

mclaren hey max verstappen of redbull racing! not sure if you heard but you did win the grand prix this weekend

maxverstappen1 No i know, this is just definitely better.

ynusername where's my photo credits 🫵

mclaren my bad bbg 😍

user12 nurse she got out again

oscarpiastri we'll win next time!!

mclaren who told you that 🤨

oscarpiastri the voices in my head

logansargeant you hold on bro, we'll find your meds soon

user13 i think moto moto likes you ahh image

user14 i need to shrink him and put him in my pocket and keep him there

user15 which one?

user14 lando

landonorris nuh uh, pick again

maxfewtrell you can't post pictures without consent mate

mclaren i didn't??

landonorris i didn't consent.

mclaren who are you gonna believe max? me? or the solid concrete evidence in front of you

user16 he looks like he can do some crazy tricks on a trampoline

landonorris this is the only comment about myself that hasnt made me viscerally angry

oscarpiastri unfortunately i feel the opposite

user17 lany/n at it again

user18 literally what the fuck do you mean

user17 if you dont get it, i can't explain it to you

user18 okay cryptic ass, fuck you 🙄

user19 they're in love guys, just wait and see

user20 yall just love saying stupid shit on this page huh

user19 i hate getting accused of some shit i actually do 😡 like yeah i do love that but who told you

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user20 op be so fr right now

user21 everytime one of these illiterate f1 drivers pulls one of the hottest women on earth a fairty dies

user21 *fairy

user22 fairty

user21 you shut the fuck up 🫵

user23 people when coworkers are seen together at their place of work

user24 do you hug your coworkers and follow them like a lost puppy when you could be on a break

user23 wtf no

user24 EXACTLY MF, THIS IS NOT COWORKERS BEING COWORKERS

user25 history will say they were just colleagues 😔

opeightywon this shit is a national tragedy

user26 every time i see a post like this i think about the fact that she has probably seen this and i shiver

user27 honestly praying on their downfall

opeightywon wtf

user28 lando fans be normal challenge

user27 idgaf about that white man, she's just too hot for him 😕

opeightywon oh yeah real

user29 i need another youtube video where they stare at each other longingly again asap or i fear i may start having withdrawal symptoms

user30 another hot girl lost to an average white man's swagless looks and cringe fail personality i feel sick

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liked by landonorris, lilyzneimer, and 44,786 others

mclaren not our best results in canada but we improved i guess 🙄 but on a much better, more exciting note: NEW MCLAREN YOUTUBE CHALLENGE OUT GO GO GO GO

17,998 comments

user31 my crops are watered, my skin is clear, my funds are tripled

mclaren all me 😮‍💨

user32 "yay challenge video" we all cry in unison

user33 OSCAR FANS IS IT REAL??? HAS IT COME TRUE??? IS THAT A FACE PIC I SEE

user34 and it's good quality too 🤩 what did we do to deserve this

mclaren you don't, but oscar bought me coffee all weekend

oscarpiastri yes i bribed her, i feel no shame

user35 lando's back in the dog house bro, he's back to no face pics

user36 but look at his beautiful brown eyes

mclaren babe they're greenish blue with the TINIEST bit of brown 💀

user37 how long you gotta stare at a man's eyes to know the exact paint blend 🫵

user38 DOWN HORRENDOUSSSSSS

lilyzneimer insert comical heart eyes here

mclaren flirting with your man 🤢 on MY cellular device

lilyzneimer my bad bb, he doesn't mean anything to me anyways 🥴

oscarpiastri ok what the fuck

danielricciardo DROP THE CAMERA SETTINGS AND MY LIFE IS YOURS

mclaren check dms 🤲

danielricciardo thanks love you're the best

landonorris LOVE??? LMAOOOO

user39 bro is losing the dgaf war MISERABLY

user40 the way lando is staring at her the whole time she's behind the camera 😫 oh he's not even down bad, bro's down under

landonorris can i get the camera settings

mclaren has anyone ever told you how good you are at photography?? i'm not saying that, i'm just asking 😀

landonorris oKAY fuck you.

user41 the way she doesn't even pretend to care about the results

landonorris i know 🙄

mclaren i know p13 is nawttt talking back to me right now

user41 OHHH SHE ATE YOU UP HUH

landonorris y'all are some fake ass fans fr

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8:57 PM.

Y/n stared at the flashing numbers on the digital clock in the boardroom and huffed quietly. The table in front of her was covered in a mix of shredded mozzarella cheese and vibrant, red pizza sauce. Flour with evidence of handprints and bits of pizza dough decorated the wood and the woman internally sighed at the thought of clean up. Eventually she would have to get back to work.

Lando was on his phone across the table from her, and she fought the urge to stare at him. Oscar had left a while ago, having an earlier flight than them out of Canada. Lando and her had made the executive decision to stay and finish the pizza the two men had made during the "not my hands" YouTube challenge. It was messy, and didn't fully resemble a proper pizza, but it tasted good enough if not a little bit burnt. The two had been sitting in a comfortable silence for the time being while they ate.

In the time Y/n had gotten to know the British man, both on and off the track, she found herself warming up to him considerably. He was kinder than she gave him credit for at the beginning of the season, and far funnier. She could see now that more often than not he spoke without thinking or having any consideration, and maybe he was more than a little bit arrogant, but he also felt things deeply and cared passionately.

Before she could think about what she was doing, Lando's eyes met hers and he smirked. Y/n's face burned but she rolled her eyes at him and took another bite of their burnt pizza. Her ears caught the sound of him placing his phone on the table, and when she looked up again he was leaning his body across the table and toward her instead.

"What are you staring at? Hm?" He teased and she scoffed.

"You," she started and took another bite of her pizza, "have pizza sauce all over your face, you idiot. And I'm just thinking, not sure if you're familiar with the concept." He grabbed a napkin quickly and began wiping rapidly at his chin and mouth, and even his nose. She couldn't help but laugh loudly. There was nothing on his face. He was perfect actually. Unfortunately.

"Did I get it? Why didn't you tell me sooner, traitor!" She doubled over but nodded anyways.

"What are you thinking about?" he questioned as he settled back down.

"Just the season, you and Oscar," she muttered.

"Me? Thinking of little ol' me when I'm right here in front of you," she rolled her eyes with a groan.

"You have selective hearing Lando," he laughed and nodded.

"Well what have you thought about it? The season I mean. And myself of course, don't care much what you think about Osc," he leaned on his hand and stared at her intently. Y/n couldn't help that being stared at by Lando felt a little bit like being ocean, being pulled and pushed by the moon's gravity. Her brain didn't work properly around him.

Or maybe I'm just really dramatic and he's just hot, she thought miserably, Probably the latter.

"I just think maybe you and me got off on the wrong foot," she said as she fumbled with the lid of her water bottle, "and I think that maybe I enjoy this job a lot more than I thought I would." The comments seemed to sober Lando's mood up slightly.

Maybe I shouldn't have been truthful. Maybe it shouldn't have been that serious.

"What did you think of me?" He asked quietly. "When you met me I mean."

"Do you want me to be honest?" He looked at her quizzically.

"Of course I want you to be honest Y/n, or I wouldn't have asked."

"I thought you were kind of an asshole," she whispered and he laughed.

"So the beef was real for you," he smiled slightly and she let her face fall gently into her hands.

"Yeah," she breathed out a laugh, "yeah maybe a little."

"Doesn't seem like a little," he goaded and she shot him a glare.

"Okay Lord Lando, maybe more than a little," he pointed at her triumphantly.

"AHA! So it was the instagram comment. I thought you knew I was kidding," A loud groan filled the room as she smacked her head on the table. Lando's giggling could probably be heard down the hall but Y/n found she didn't care all that much anymore.

"It wasn't just the instagram comment," she defended weakly. There was a brief silence as Lando stared into space and shook his head.

"Wow... I can't believe you were actually mad at me and I just didn't know."

"It wasn't that big of a deal I guess, I just felt like you didn't really take me seriously."

"Well I mean you're not a very serious person," Y/n's heart fell to her stomach.

"What?" She asked, staring at him. She couldn't have heard him right.

"Well it's just that you're not very serious are you? Like since I met you, it's never felt like you were a serious sort of person." He added as if that was some sort of defense.

As if that isn't more hurtful.

"You're not like Zak or Andrea, or really anyone else here you know? You're just you, you're different. It was hard to be serious with you here because that's just who you are." He continued.

God just shut up, please for the love of God just shut up.

"This is my place of work Lando," she muttered bitterly. "I mean do you hear yourself." His eyes widened and he put his hands out placatingly. Like she was some sort of rabid animal he needed to calm down.

"No no no," he muttered quickly and stood up to round the table, "that's not what I meant Y/n, you know that."

"Stop Lando, just stop," she said as she began to clear off the table.

Why did she expect him to be different. What made her think he could've changed.

"You made it perfectly clear what you mean. What you think of me and of my work, my career" she spit out, swiping everything on the table into the trash. They hadn't finished eating the pizza and now it was in the bin, but Lando didn't deserve to eat the pizza she helped him make. He didn't deserve to be here at all. He wasn't her friend, he was her coworker and nothing else. It was better she accept that now.

"You misunderstood what I said," he grabbed her arm to stop her from cleaning and she whipped it out of his grasp.

"Stop Lando," she said raising her voice. She knew her eyes were teary but she didn't care. She knew her face was red with embarrassment and her hands were shaking with the force of her humiliation but she didn't care. Lando Norris could go fuck himself.

He looked at her in shock and winced as he saw her face. She steeled herself. She had never cried over a man before, why would she do it now.

"You need to leave, you have a flight in the morning," she said emotionlessly. "And I have to clean so I can go home." He tried to speak and she put her hand up, stepping away from him.

"Get out please, you're in my way," she said and his brows scrunched. He was angry? Good, so was she.

"I'm in your way?" He asked incredulously, as if she didn't have any reason to be upset. "You're not even going to hear me out?" He scoffed.

"No Lando, I don't have time for this. I have a job to do and you're in my way," she said emphasizing the words as if speaking to a child. His face fell. He looked angry.

"Whatever Y/n. What fucking ever," he muttered, grabbing his bag and storming out. Y/n waited. Footsteps in the hallways continued until a far off door slammed.

Y/n wilted like an unwatered plant as tears began to fall.

So much for friends.

She knew deep down she was hurt about much more than just friendship.

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this is the second to last chapter of part one! i hope you enjoy! please feel free to comment and send requests, i'm excited to hear your thoughts <3

-

𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

@lemon-lav @slutforpopculture @m4rt10ne @urfavsgf @sadsierra2 @96jnie @sltwins @poppyflower-22 @alliumiae @livelovesports @liberty-barnes @the-holy-trinity-l @iliwyss @awritingtree @redpool @elliotts1one @velentine @chaoticmessneutralplease @5sospenguinqueen @charizznorizz @2pagenumb @mxdi0 @cwiphswmwasohmm @tremendousstarlighttragedy @lnspipedrm @itseightbeats @tinycoffeeroom @woozarts @personwhoisther @a-beaverhausen @love-simon @annabellelee @ravisinghs-wife @chezmardybum @greantii @weekendlusting @monserelates @sapphiccloud @halleest @deamus-liv @gigigreens @morenofilm @laneyspaulding19 @lanireadss @dear-fifi @moldyshorts1997 @oliviarodrigostan13 @eugene-emt-roe @ilivbullyingjeongin @im-a-ghost666

[lovebugism]

hey bug 🫶🏻 “cant stand that they're ignoring them” maybe r and Steve work together and he's been extra annoying lately. So r decides to ignore him. But he's only acting like a fool because he's in love 🥺

this fic ended up taking a life of it's own, so it's a wee bit different from your request, but i hope you like it anon!! — the one where you and steve are the personification of the "idiots in love" trope (friends to lovers, 1.5k)

Steve hears you before he sees you. A pair of whispers float down the windowless corridor of Family Video, sounding much more obvious in the otherwise silent store. He pauses mid-stride, with his fingers frozen on the buttons of his vest. His ears strain to listen. They find your familiar voice with little effort.

“—I can’t ‘just ask him out,’ Rob. It’s not that easy. I’m way too chicken shit.”

“Well, the worst he could say is no,” Robin attempts to assure you, voice deep and gritty and barely a whisper.

“Yeah, actually,” you huff, horrified. “That’s absolutely the worst thing he could say.”

“Except, he won’t because he’s not an idiot,” she argues.There’s a brief and stagnant pause, a fleeting moment of silent communication, until Robin exhales a heavy sigh. “Okay, he is a little bit of an idiot— but he’s an idiot that’s been in love with you for two years, so… He’s not stupid enough to turn you down.”

Distantly curious and very boyishly heartbroken, Steve decides to make himself known. He plasters a lopsided smile on his plush mouth, only slightly forced, to compensate for his bleeding heart. “What are you guys talkin’ about, huh?” he wonders, knowingly.

Your head snaps over your shoulder, eyes wide with horror. “Nothing,” you blurt, too quickly to be convincing.

Robin is not as nonchalant as you are. Totally unable to be casual, she says the first lie that comes to mind. “Eddie Munson,” she answers in a feeble attempt to cover your ass. 

Steve’s forced laughter fills the empty store. Robin cowers at the glare you give her and musters a wavering smile.

“Eddie? Eddie Munson?” Steve echoes, still chuckling. He folds his arms over the countertop across from you, biceps golden and strained against the sleeves of his polo. His smile is even prettier up close, but it hurts a little ‘cause he’s laughing at you. “You? Have a crush on Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson? There’s no way!”

You’d tell him there really was no way if he wasn’t being such an asshole about it. You thought you’d been caught for a moment — thought surely Steve would know that you were talking about him — but he’s a bigger idiot than you gave him credit for, turns out.

“It’s not that funny, Steve,” you squint.

He hums a teasing I don’t know type of sound and clicks his tongue against his teeth. “It is a little bit funny. I mean— Munson’s a total dumbass.”

You bite back a knowing smirk. “Well, I happen to like that about him,” you argue, leaning into the stupid joke. It’s easier to lie when it feels more like you’re talking about the quote-unquote dumbass in front of you.

“Well, you’d be the first,” Steve scoffs. His fake smile trembles at the edges when it gets harder to keep his guard up. “So, like, what now? Are you guys gonna be like… boyfriend-girlfriend or…?”

You meet his teasing smirk with a flat face. “You’re so annoying.”

“Have you guys kissed yet?” Steve pries, like he’s trying to break his own heart. “Or are you too scared of catchin’ his cooties?”

You roll your eyes and turn away, taking a fresh stack of tapes with you. Steve, assuming your silence is his answer, inhales a cartoonish gasp and follows behind you. “Holy shit, you have! Was it the worst? I mean, I’m assuming it was ‘cause… Eddie’s only ever had experience with the back of his hand, so… It must’ve been awful.”

His sarcasm is just investigative journalism, really. He wants to know what’s happened between you and the town freak — how far deep you’re in with Eddie and how much of a shot he’s got left with you.

“I’m not entertaining this,” you lilt and beeline for the Romantic Comedy section.

Steve follows close behind. “Why not?” he presses over your shoulder, towering over you as you slide the tapes into their designated spots. “I know Munson better than most people, you know? So maybe I can put in a good word for you or something—”

“Not necessary,” you deadpan.

He keeps on going. Digging the hole, as it were. “I could talk you up a bit. Get some top-secret info on his big fat crush on you—”

Your heart twists with every word out of his mouth. Not because he’s teasing you, but because you thought maybe, maybe, Steve might’ve liked you back. But now it feels like you just made all that up in your head. Because if he liked you like you thought he did, he wouldn’t be trying to set you up with someone else.

“—Help make it official and everything.”

“I don’t have a crush on Eddie,” you blurt before you mean to.

Steve’s rambling ceases. He feels immediate relief first, then palpable confusion right after. “…What?”

“I have a crush on you, you idiot,” you grouse, shoving the leftover tapes into his chest and storming off towards the breakroom.

Steve stands frozen in place while you leave, with a stack of VHSs held haphazardly in his arms. Wide-eyed and slightly embarrassed, he watches you disappear around the corner of the hallway. His gaze flits to Robin then, who tries to look busy on the computer, but really she’s just clicking at random spots on the screen.

“Well, I totally fucked that up, didn’t I?” he wonders dryly.

“Sorry,” the brunette grimaces. “That was kinda my fault— No one ever taught me how to be casual, so now I kinda… freak out when I have to be normal.”

Steve scoffs. That much was evident to him a long time ago.

He stalks into the break room sometime later — tail between his legs, heart in his throat. The old door squeaks open and shut again, a harsh sound in the deafening quiet. If you notice his presence, you make no effort to show it. Or look at him. Or even acknowledge his existence. 

Steve knows he doesn’t deserve either.

“Hey…” he starts softly, voice wavering.

“Don’t,” you interject, much harsher than you intended, with your back still facing him. You stand at the counter and stick clearance stickers on tapes that aren’t selling well as an excuse to busy your anxious hands. “Don’t say anything, okay? Just… let me be an idiot in peace.”

Steve chuckles under his breath. “I don’t think you’re an idiot.”

You flash him a glare over your shoulder.

“I’m the dumbass in this equation, alright?” the boy assures and stands at your side. He keeps a few unsure inches between the two of you, just in case he’s totally screwed everything up. “I mean, seriously. I can’t keep my mouth shut for shit.”

You scoff a faint laugh that you try to keep hidden.

An absentminded smile tugs unknowingly at his lips. Steve watches you with an unwavering stare made of melted honey as he confesses, “When Robin said you had a thing for Eddie, I just… My heart fell to my ass, you know? And then everything just started building up like vomit, and I started spitting it all out before I even realized…”

Your face screws. “Jeez…”

“Sorry,” Steve grimaces. “Gross metaphor.”

“I just don’t want things to change between us,” you admit distantly, gaze averted as you smooth a 20% off sticker over Class of Nuke ‘Em High. “I don’t want things to be weird now.”

“Things aren’t weird,” Steve reassures with a quiet chuckle.

You flash him a hopeful glance, eyes twinkling beneath your lashes. “So we can still be friends?”

“Of course,” the boy scoffs. “Who else am I gonna run to when Robin’s annoying the shit outta me?”

You try hard to bite back the smile tugging at your lips, but Steve makes it extremely difficult. “Right,” you nod, caging your beam between your teeth.

“But… you know…” Steve starts, slow and vague, as he props an elbow over the countertop. A cheeky smirk sits crooked on his mouth. “I do have it on good authority that—”

“Please don’t bring up Eddie again,” you plead jokingly.

“No. I was— I was gonna say that the guy, you know, that you wanted to ask out tonight or whatever…” the boy trails off, going suddenly shy as he averts his gaze, scruffy cheeks flaring pink. “I was just gonna say that he definitely wouldn’t say no.”

Your chest warms. “Oh…”

“Yeah,” Steve nods. “He’s had a crush on you for, like, two whole years now, so… He’s not stupid enough to turn you down.”

“Is that so?” you question with a teasing lilt, turning to face him fully. You catch his eyes falling to your mouth, for no more than a flicker of a moment, and you smirk.

“How ‘bout Benny’s Burgers?” he questions, voice low and honeyed and full of yearning. The proximity’s got his head spinning. “Tomorrow night? Six o’clock?”

“Sounds good,” you hum, trying to play it as cool as he is now.

Steve nods with a similar casualness, then swipes a golden hand through his hair when a chestnut strand falls over his forehead. “Good,” is all he says in response — lest he say more and his voice break with excitement.

You wait until the door clicks shut behind him to squeal to yourself like a teenage girl.

[certifiedcodbabygirl]

Baby's first fever

Simon Riley x Reader w/ daughter (Lizzy)

(Photo credit to @ave661, go check her renders out, they're really good)

Parenthood is a terrifying experience, especially as first time parent. Even with preparation, all the books, and a loving husband. Lizzy had been sniffly the night before, but not too terribly. Nothing of concern though.

So imagine your surprise when you go to check on your 6 month old in the morning and you feel her head is hot.

"Ohh no no no baby" You say, panicked as you gently pick her up. Her little whimpers practically break your heart as you take her to your shared with Simon. You push the door open and see that Simon is already getting dressed, pulling his shirt off.

"Si she's sick, like really sick" You say, trying to not cry, anxiety rising. Fevers as an adult or even as a teenager are easier to fight off but as a baby? It truly is cause for concern.

He holds his arms out to hold Lizzy and puts the back of his hand to her forehead, frowning at the warmness. He gently swipes his thumb on her cheek and kisses her forehead.

"You not feelin good, sweetheart?" He asks her, "come on, let's get ya some medicine, hm?"

He leans over and kisses you on the forehead, "C'mon mama"

He walks to the bathroom, with you short behind, and opens the medicine. He hands Lizzy off to you, and opens the medicine cabinet.

"Glad we got this, huh?" He smiles slightly, opening the bottle of kid's ibuprofen. He Snaps one of the little tablets in half shows the little piece to Lizzy, smiling at her.

"Open up, love" he says softly, "Gonna make ya feel better"

He gently parts her lips and puts the small tablet on her tongue. She immediately starts to suck on the tablet, nose slightly scrunching from the weird tastes. He runs his fingers through her soft curls, kissing her head. He notices you trying to keep calm, your lip twitching slightly and obviously keeping back tears.

"She'll be okay, just a lil sick, ya?", He tucks your hair behind your ear and kisses you, "C'mon, lets give her a bath"

He sits you down on the toilet while he runs an slightly cooler bath so that she doesn't go into shock. While he runs the bath, you look down at Lizzy. Her face is a little red and her nose is runny. Your eyes well up in tears. Logically you know she'll be okay, but she's so little.

You never thought a baby with Simon would/ could happen, yet here she was. Brown curls, big brown eyes just like her dad's, a shining reflection of the man you love. Nothing prepared you for the overwhelming love you felt when you first held her. The click of motherhood that you instantly had when her skin touched yours causing you to cry. Your sweet girl.

You snap out your thoughts as you hear Simon call for you.

"Hm?" you say half mindedly, looking up at him.

"Bath's ready"

You hum in acknowledgement, standing up and setting her down on the counter, undressing her. You check the water temperature, and gently set her in the baby bath basket you got for her. She splashes a little, feeling cold in the room temperature water due to her fever. She whimper and fusses and you sniffle again.

"I know baby, I know", you coo at her, "You'll be okay, my love. Just gotta get you clean, yeah?"

The bath goes smoothly (with a few tears let's be honest). You pass her off to Simon as you go off to get her crib sheets and blankets changed out and pick out her outfit. Simon walks in with her in her little towel and a fresh diaper. You help change her into her clothes and go to the kitchen to make her a half bottle of warm formula.

You grab the bottle and head towards the nursery but notice he's laying on the couch with Lizzy on his chest. Standing in the doorway, you can see how tired they both are, Lizzy sick and Simon, well, REASONS 👀. You go back to the kitchen and put the bottle into the fridge for later. You gently tiptoe into the living room so you don't wake them up, and cuddle up to Simon's arms.

You check Lizzy's breathing and forehead temperature before allowing yourself to relax into him. His arm pulls you into him as he kisses your forehead.

"She's gonna be okay, baby. L'ts get some rest"

[strawberries-and-summer-days]

WE'RE... WHAT?? ‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅

| percy jackson x popstar au

| au masterlist ☽

summary:

warnings: swearing and i think thats just about it!

a/n: part two of the series is out! im procrastinating the shit out of all my other requests so im not ignoring any of you btw!! lets all collectively ignore the fact that gracie like a post that has a lyric from her song (also damn im really just smashing out these fics)

"y/n has officially flitted off to boston!" clarisse announces suddenly from chris's lap.

"huh?" grover's head snaps up. "what do you mean?"

"y/n l/n, she's come to boston for her concerts," clarisse says showing her phone screen.

"you have got to be shitting me," chris says. "this is going to end terribly. seriously? here? boston? percy's gonna shit himself."

"oh really why would you think that?" clarisse drawls. "it's not like they don't like each other, they're like besties!"

"and y'know to make things worse y/n's setlist has been posted for months so we legit could've avoided her," chris sighs.

"yeah well, next time you see percy and he comes home grumbling about a business meeting in boston you deal with it then," grover argues.

"okay all of you shut it, percy's coming inside with luke so shhh," clarisse snaps.

"shh about what?" luke asks settling down on the couch next to grover.

"you'll never believe who's in boston!" grover sing songs. it doesn't take luke very long to work out who and his eyes widen in realisation

"no."

"yes."

"well shit."

"yep."

"we're in for a show."

☾. ⋅

percyjackson

liked by underovergrover, chris.rodriguez, lukecastellan, clarisse.la.rue, the.annabethchase and 1, 402, 385 others

percyjackson hello boston! one non-reschedulable meeting later and here we are...

view all comments

underovergrover i expect full compensation for making those pizzas WHICH YOU TOOK CREDIT FOR

percyjackson YOU DID NOT! I MADE HALF OF THOSE - MINE WERE BETTER

clarisse.la.rue no they weren't

percyjackson 🖕🏼

user1 ugh im in love

user2 omggg he's in boston!! so is y/n l/n!! are they following each other around?

user3 PLS I WOULD DIE MAKE THIS A THING

user4 i wonder if he's going to a concert here?? 😏

user5 does anyone else find it weird how his entire friend group follows him around?? no just me? they're just a huge freak show

user6 booooo we dont like haters here

user7 y/n l/n and percy neeeeed to happen rnnnn

user8 YES YES YES

lukecastellan im so ready to be done with this shit and go home

theannabethchase aww is someone feeling homesick?

lukecastellan yes obviously

user8 i. love. him.

☾. ⋅

"see i told you this would happen!" grover screeches, running away from percy who is threatening to castrate him if he doesn't get his phone back.

"i don't care! just give me the damn thing back!"

percy had groaned for two straight minutes when he found out that y/n was in boston this weekend - he had also face planted onto the couch and used some extremely obscene words.

"if it helps at least you'll be leaving on sunday," chris had offered in the midst of his crisis. it didn't help.

so now when grover trips over a fallen pillow - which may or may not be from percy's tantrum but we don't talk about that - and percy wrenches the phone from him a loud - and might grover add overtly girly - scream.

"WHAT THE FUCK? NO! NO NO NO NO!"

his screen is on the article grover had opened with really poorly photoshopped images of percy and y/n walking together. every gossip site/blog has swarmed the photos and circulated them sending the internet into a spiral.

"im fucking done with this grover," percy groans flopping onto the couch. "its a good thing we're leaving tomorrow - we'll be back in new york thats a huge ass city i wont see y/n there again and i can just go into hibernation, let all the rumours die down and be done with this whole shit show."

if only right....

☾. ⋅

☾. ⋅

yn.official

liked by sabrinacarpenter, lia.mandel, gracieabrams and 932, 841 others

yn.official feel like maybe i might go to boston! you were the best audience and im honoured to have performed for you these past two nights! heading home now to rest and recharge for the final shows in new york

view all comments

lia.mandel yayy you're finally coming home i missed you 🥺

yn.official bitch please its been like a week

lia.mandel and every second of it has been torture

user1 MOTHERRRR

user2 i think i nearly fainted when she came up on stage i was so happy i coulda died right then-

user3 the lyric makes me so happyyy

user4 ikrr y/n is like the queen of lyrics and the way she sneakily adds them into her posts 🤭

user5 WERE YOU WITH PERCY JACKSON THIS WEEKEND?? 🤨 I NEED TO KNOW

user6 y/n and percy are my dream celebrity ship

user7 they'd be the biggest power couple in history

user8 can you hard launch with percy plss?? i dont care if its fake i just need content to feed my delusions!

☾. ⋅

lia's soft snores fill the plane aggravating the hell out of you. usually you'd find the way she curled up in a ball underneath a blanket and snored quietly to be adorable. but since you're tired, just finished performing a concert and there's a problem with the jet, its grating on your nerves.

you had also been scrolling on twitter, instagram and pinterest, curled up underneath a matching blanket urging something to catch your attention while whatever work was being done on the plane happened.

unfortunately for you the thing that did catch your attention was the dozens of very clearly photoshopped pictures of you and percy walking together on a quiet street in boston.

no way in hell thats real. for one; ew and two; percy was only here for the weekend you were here for the week and you would've had no time to go out in between concerts.

eventually you doze off not realising you're in the air until you're ears pop waking you up to lia grinning mischievously.

"what asshole?"

"you're adorable when you wake up, you know that right?"

"yes i know."

"seriously the cutest human on the planet."

"what do you want lia?"

"a gossip podcast has picked up the subject of you and percy jackson. and the host is saying shit about you."

your eyes widen for a moment. "oh my god what? wow its almost as if i don't care!" ypu give lia a blank look. "this happens every three months lia, i do something and people either love it or hate it. thats the way it goes."

"yeah but this is PERCY JACKSON Y/N! he's gorgeousness personified."

"ugh can i go back to sleep? you can fangirl to me tomorrow when im in bed and pretending to listen."

"im offended." she leans over to place a kiss on your head. "but sleep tight babes, we land in like forty minutes."

shutting your eyes again you drift back to sleep.

only when you wake up do you realise you dreamed of percy...

TAGLIST‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅ [if you're name is white it mean i couldn't tag you] @lauptimist, @itzmeme, @mariaaaaaahhhh, @paankhaleyaar, @maybxlle, @lara20aral, @cxp1d, @user-3113s-blog, @pleasingregulus, @avihashearts4lix, @inlovewithmorales, @brokecollegebitch, [if you want to be added just let me know!]

[queenendless]

📱Home Screen (Teen!Gojo x Fem!Reader x Teen!Geto)📱

A/N: So this is from my Curses Love (JJK x Reader) book on Wattpad under my other username on here; CosmicQueen10.

This is set in an AU where you're a student alongside these two at JJ High. Dating them both. And they're cool with it. Gonna write more with this AU in mind here and there. Also gonna write these shorts to ease my need for precious content with my two faves and put them out as much as possible.

All credit to the characters/show/pics goes to Gege sensei. Please don't steal or copy my work. Please like and reblog. I hope you enjoy.

Nodding off amidst the cool breeze and the warm skinny sunbeams trickling through the shade of the tree leaves covering you, the rustling of your hair stirred you slightly awake, followed by a familiar enriching laugh.

"Y/n-chan~?"

You softly whined as you rubbed your eyes, working yourself more alert, as you blinked until your vision cleared up to witness yourself sitting on a bench amidst the school grounds, right beside your beaming grinning boyfriend.

"Wakey wakey, sweetie~!"

The arm of one Gojo Satoru wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you flush against his side, as his other hand opened up his flip phone.

"Wanna take a photo with me~?"

"Huh? Uhhhh .... okay."

The flash of the phone's camera snapped.

"Ooh~! Lookie lookie~!" Turning his phone around, you saw what made his face lit up.

His shades slid down to the tip of his nose, his vibrant blue eye opened giving a side view to the camera, his free hand squeezed your shoulder, and your closed eyed blushing face as he kissed the corner of your mouth.

"If you wanted a new home screen, you could have just said so." You couldn't stop smiling bashfully as he chuckled at the sight.

A weighted plop on the empty spot beside you on the bench grabbed both your attention.

"Sorry for making you both wait."

"About time, Suguru. Hey, take a look at this! Ain't Y/n-chan so cute~?!" Gojo literally smothered his phone screen all up in Geto's face. "You gotta get in on the action, buddy~!"

"Hmm," Geto hummed in thought; mirth already overtaking his black eyes as did his own sneaky grin. "Not a bad idea, Satoru." As he pulled out his own phone out of his pants pocket, his other hand brushed through your hair, cradling the back of your noggin as your cheek rested on his shoulder. "Care to take another, honey~?"

You had an inkling this would transpire. He is your other boyfriend, after all.

Besides, you like where this is going. You nodded shyly, earning a sly smile in return before he posed you two just right. The flashing of his phone's camera came next.

The snapshot of him kissing your forehead as you bashfully closed your eyes while also blushing vividly earned a hearty chuckle from Geto and a woo-hoo whistle from Gojo as you chose to keep your face buried on Geto's shoulder for the moment; adding to their amusement.

"Not bad, not bad Suguru~ However, if we make this a trio set, then we'll really hit the jackpot~!"

"Yeah yeah, I'm right here ya know!" You finally looked up, pulled out your own phone, readying to take your own selfie. "But I'm choosing the pose this time."

"And that would be~?" Their united voices; the delight evident on their expecting faces, made you duck your head in steamy sheepishness. Your finger beckoned them to draw closer to hear your whispered desire. Hearing what you asked made them exchange smirks.

"Deal. On 3. Ready?" Gojo asked.

Your shy nod confirmed it.

"Okay ... 1 ... 2 ... 3!"

And as you tapped to take the shot, in came a third flash.

Just as twice before, it all happened so fast.

Your giggle broke out through the air at the sight of what overtook your screen.

Gojo smooching your right cheek and Geto kissing your left cheek, a small but lovely smile on your face.

"Best. One. Yet~!" Gojo cheered.

"Agreed." Geto hummed in content.

That was your new home screen.

For now, at least.

No doubt newer ones would top them all along the way.

[genericpuff]

Was the Hera×Echo thing for real?! Was it like planned??? It doesn't feel like it was planned! It feels like Rachel just wanted to queerbait to gather more new readers wtf

yeah it's exactly that tbh

FASTPASS SPOILERS AHEAD !!!

like what more realistically happened is she saw people headcanon'ing Echo and Hera and went "yeah sure I'll do that!" without actually writing the fucking relationship.

This was even a problem back in S2 with Echo's character as a whole, she's introduced as this mysterious 'double agent' character who's almost definitely working for Zeus-

-but then aside from two scenes involving Echo accompanying Hera to the motel to retrieve Persephone's things and Echo warning Daphne that Apollo clearly isn't 'over Persephone' (because he had, y'know, barged into Hera's office demanding Hera's blessing) the whole "Echo is a double agent for Zeus" thing was only confirmed after Daphne was turned into a tree and Echo said "FUCK YOU ZEUS, I'M NOT GONNA DO YOUR DIRTY WORK ANYMORE!" which ... huh? Where's the plot? It feels like there was an entire story there that just got dumped entirely so that Hades and Persephone could play golf with diamonds.

Like this was presumably where Echo ditched her obligation to Zeus, but it had nothing to do with Hera, it was because she heard (I'm assuming from Thanatos) what happened to Daphne.

After that we only ever see Echo again when it's implied that her and Hera had some kind of falling out. No idea what over, maybe it was Hera finding out that Echo was a double agent, maybe Hera called her a slur, we have no clue what. But it's sorta just tacked on during an ongoing monologue about how Kronos has affected her.

The only other 'hint' we got towards it was Ares calling Echo Hera's 'girlfriend' but that doesn't mean a whole lot when we've literally never seen these two have more than two scenes together.

So now Rachel making them kiss feels more like her taking credit for writing a plotline that doesn't exist and was fabricated entirely in the audience's headcanon. And this is something Rachel does a lot, she basically relies entirely on her audience filling in the blanks for her nothingburger plot and then of course gets to take all the credit for being a "smart and inclusive writer". Where? Literally where the fuck is the actual writing?

Imagine if we had gotten a proper B-plot showcasing the relationship between Echo and Hera. Echo is working for Hera as a double agent and doesn't want to blow her cover, while Hera is suspicious because she worries her husband is up to something. Over time they work together, grow closer, Hera realizes that Echo makes her feel a kind of happiness that Zeus hasn't made her feel in a long time, Echo realizes that she can't keep lying to Hera about why she was hired and decides she values Hera's loyalty and respect over Zeus' because she has feelings for Hera now. Maybe Hera finds out about Echo being a double agent, either by overhearing a conversation between Echo and Zeus or because Echo outright tells her, and eventually it resolves with them finally admitting their feelings towards one another and Hera realizing that she's felt trapped in a loveless marriage that's essentially serving the same purpose as her union with Kronos, sacrificing her well-being for the good of a King. They kiss and Hera confronts the original perpetrator of her trauma, Kronos, ready to end the cycle of her abuse once and for all.

Like, the plot is right fucking there but Rachel keeps dumping it in favor of focusing on the boring ass heterocis nightmares that are Hades and Persephone, who get SO MUCH FUCKING SCREENTIME of just telling each other how amazing they are and how much they're in love (meanwhile we didn't even actually get to see or hear what Hera wrote in the letter to Echo, we have to just assume) but still tries to take credit for writing queer stories by just vaguely hinting at a queer relationship that has had zero development or actual screentime. It's Hestia and Athena all fucking over again.

It also doesn't bode well for LO passing the whole "bury your gays" test because Hera is literally marching to what she's expecting to be her death. So she's established as a bisexual character, just for her to be sent to her death, while Echo will undoubtedly get shoved out of the plot again.

And, I shouldn't even have to remind y'all of this, but Hera has been racist to nymphs in the past and Echo was her direct subordinate, her personal assistant.

It just makes zero sense to me why Rachel would suddenly force in a queer relationship between two characters who weren't traditionally gay in the original myths (once again removing the queer aspects of CANONICALLY LGBTQ+ GODS AND GIVING THEM TO THE STRAIGHTS INSTEAD) when Hera's story had more than enough to work with through her trauma from both Kronos and Zeus and her loyalty as the goddess of marriage that's kept her trapped in a loveless and abusive relationship. So now instead of having a subplot that could have been about the goddess of marriage realizing that no one should have to stay in a marriage that's robbing them of joy and the "sanctity of marriage" isn't worth being miserable for life, we have a subplot where the goddess of marriage who is racist to nymphs routinely cheats on her husband and now confesses her love to a nymph who we never even saw her interact with outside of two instances where it was simply a working relationship.

[kyber-crystal]

Hi! May I request a sequel to "my little love" for how jake responds to max calling him dad/daddy for the first time? or jake being cute with max and your shared kids (bc i KNOW y'all don't stop after the first one lol)

i'm sorry it took me so long to respond to this but HELL YEAH and i'm extra sorry i didn't post this for a while b/c i wasn't sure about how it turned out in general...anyways, i hope you enjoy : ')

my future || jake "hangman" seresin

summary: as written above! this is a sequel to the headcanon my little love, which i LOVED writing w my whole heart.

settling into married life was surprisingly not difficult. you'd already spent so much time around hangman that forever felt so comfortable

now everyone is so happy and in high spirits. but max is significantly happier than them all and it's so wholesome to see

rooster, or "fairy godmother" (max likes to call him the latter....yes...godmother, not godfather. you don't know why but it's so funny, especially when you watch rooster react to this), is always there to take care of your kiddo when you're busy

he let him sit in his F-14 and take a picture with him :)

and you're paranoid and worrying the whole time but rooster's like "relax, i got him" and he's super chill about it

"he's gonna be a pilot. better than you, even," you leaned over and gave your husband a look

"i think so!"

the kid lives and breathes top gun. and now that you've moved in with hangman, you're only a few minutes' walk from base, making it easy to go back and forth.

when you're working at the hard deck, penny sits him by the nearest booth with a milkshake and some old books and toys

if one of the uncles or phoenix wasn't busy, they'd come over to keep him entertained

and you know when hangman's done for the day when you see max break into his signature grin. you've noticed that you only really see it around him

so you're celebrating his fourth birthday today. it's insane, because he already speaks like a six year old (hangman says it's because you're also smart af. but, being the cocky lil shit he is, fanboy likes to take the credit for it. i mean, the guy majored in biochem, so he knows his stuff)

it's an off day for everyone, so they're able to come help decorate the place. you had the idea to surprise your son, so while everyone was getting ready, fanboy was with max by the beach, playing soccer. they'd come back in an hour and boom!

by the end of things, the hard deck doesn't look like the hard deck anymore. it looks like max's paradise—a kiddie version of top gun, you realize. your heart melts because 🥺🥺🥺

everyone hides when they hear fanboy and max coming in

and then you all jump up from your hiding spots and yell "SURPRISE" and he starts grinning again

and then the kid runs straight towards hangman, giggling in pure delight

"daddy!" he yells

you're all like wait wtf

did he just

say

oh

hangman has to stop for a moment before picking him up. you can see him tearing up bc this is the first time max has ever said this

it's definitely really fulfilling to watch. when he was a baby and screamed and cried for hours at a time out of nowhere, you knew it wasn't always just from tiredness. or being hungry. or whatnot

the rest of the night you're all emotional af and max notices

"daddy why are you crying?"

there go the waterworks...more tears slip down jake's face 🥺😭

"because i'm happy!"

"people cry when they are sad! like when uncle fanboy loses to uncle payback!"

"HEY! kid, i thought you were on my side"

"so, i'm your dad now, huh?"

"forever and ever and ever and ever!"

how could you have gotten so lucky...

you're sitting here in the middle of the hard deck with your family. a family when realization hits. you had a loving husband, and a father, and a child that brightened up your world, and you couldn't have asked for anything more. you finally found someone that wanted forever and wasn't one to back away

now for some more cute moments post-birthday celebration

you take max to base every day right

and hangman will carry him on his shoulders all the time

if he's not done with his flight or workout or whatever, maverick takes his place

or his fairy godmother :)

as soon as he lands, max takes off at the speed of light and goes barreling towards him (how tf is the kid so FAST)

as hangman picks him up he looks at you and says "can we please have another kid. please"

"i want a sister! tell her, daddy!"

"see, the little man agrees"

sorry this ending was so awful i genuinely apologize...

tags, including people who may be interested: @totomoshi​ @sarcastic-sourwolf​ @sebastianstangirl01​ @altheadarling​ @ellabellabus07​ @hay-9105​ @purelyfiction​ @93joons​ @criminalyetminimal​ @yeehawnana​ @lunamoonbby​ @hazelgirl355​ @multifandom-fangirl4​ @paintballkid711​ @lyn-lc​ @whatlovegattado​ @azari-anna​ @thelifeofthelifeofme​ @lets-be-gay-for-the-angel​ @quivvyintheclouds @phoenixhalliwell @winteryoungie @mychoso @lt-b-rooster-bradshaw​ @jenny-riversmith​ @krisitzeneva​ @daethsticks​ @sithwidow​ @rosie-posie1313​ @sadpetalsstuff​ @glossydi0r​ @i-simp-much​ @hay-9105​ @meeeeees-stuff​ @sweetdayme4427​ @unicornlover92​ @intrxde​ @rhiannon-russo​ @dolce-clout​ @theghost1345​ @baby-girl-e​ @greatbigshiningstar​ @joyfulbookreviewmarvelspy @julia-marshal @anya7802 @bittergomez @and-claudia @newlibrary @cosm1cfae

sorry if this doesn't seem updated! some tags include ppl who were tagged in part 1 of this blurb mini-series. if you'd like to be added to the taglist, comment or add yourself to the tgm taglist here!

[linoyan]

Three | Who are you??

Pairings: Ghost!Hyunjin x Reader!

Warnings: A lot of cursing 😭😭

Very very very special credits to whoever made/posted this gif aa

As you were about to start your call with your friends, your phone suddenly turned off. You were confused, aggressively shaking your phone and even trying to turn it back on.

"So dramatic." You froze as you heard an unfamiliar voice. It echoed loudly all over your room, it had an annoyed tone too.

You quickly turned around and fell off your bed when you saw the culprit. "Huh?" It was a man, a man.. a man you don't know- a man who's inside your room!

You quickly grabbed a pillow and dramatically threw it at the 'person'. "W-who the hell are you?! Why are you here?? Get out of my room!!!" You yelled.

The man didn't seem to be real.. Long hair, sharp eyes, really really really REALLY attractive too!

He grunted, catching the pillow and throwing it back to you, which made you flinch. "Calm down, I'm not gonna hurt yo-" You cut the man off by throwing the pillow back to him.

"Who are you?? I'm calling the police!" Maybe you were over exaggerating? Maybe just too scared to function? Or.. is this a normal reaction? I mean- who even stays calm and confused when someone you don't know is literally in your room???

"Don't, okay?? They'll think you're crazy! Wait, you can see me??" The man looked stunned as he continued to sit on your bed.

"Are you serious right now?? First, you barge into my room, and ofcourse I don't know how you did that! And second, you're thinking I'm freaking blind?!" You snapped, yelling at him as you sat on the corner of the room.

"Did i say you're blind?! All i did was ask you- Ugh.. Okay, look, my name is Hyunjin." He was about to argue with you but stopped himself, knowing all this is gonna lead both of you nowhere.

"Okay?? Hyunjin? And? I'm calling the cops- security, I don't know what they're called!!" You were a total mess right now, almost sobbing as you stood up and picked the telephone up, obviously shaking.

"Don't say i didn't warn you." He was even sitting pretty on your bed while you called for help, which made you hesitate.

You stood infront of a small table, the telephone in hand as you eyed him up and down. "..What the fuck are you?" You stared at him in disbelief.

"Human-"

"Human, Human yeah, i get it! Now answer me seriously." You shot him a glare, it was too late to even get angry yet he's already getting in your nerves.

"Let's say.. I've been in this room for a year now, but noone but you has ever seen me in this state- What do you think i am?" He smirked as he looked at you.

"A fresh damned spirit?? A ghost?? I don't know!" You exclaimed, slamming the telephone back down as you shrugged at him.

"Then i guess I'm a ghost, happy?" He shrugged back, laying down on your bed and wrapping himself up on your blanket.

"Okay wannabe bloody mary?? Like i believe you! I've never even seen a ghost before!" You walked towards him and sat down on the bed.

"Well, you have now!" He rolled his eyes at you.

"Don't give me that sass, Hyunjin. Don't think I'm going to sleep knowing you're here!" You pulled your blanket which made him roll out of it. He groaned.

Both of you remained silent for a moment, probably taking in whatever just happened.

"..Hey." He was the first to speak, he turned to look at you with a.. rather serious expression.

"What?" You answered in an instant, looking annoyed.

"Still don't believe me?"

....

"Ofcourse not."

He let out a sigh. "I'll turn your phone back on, call one of your friends and bring them here." He explained as he grabbed a pillow and placed it under his head, resting on it.

You judged him for a while, "Kinda childish." but then you grabbed your phone and turned it on. "It's the only quick way you'll believe me!"

When your phone turned on, you glared at him, now believing that he's.. unordinary.

"What??" ..

.. "I got my eye on you, Hyunjin."

He let out a scoff and went back to focus on the comfort of your bed.

[fatkish]

Y/n x JJK boys

Itadori: Think you can unlock the door for us?

Nanami: Sure, I just need a couple of things. Gojo, can I have your credit card?

Gojo: Sure, just make sure not to bend it.

Nanami: Thanks. Now (Y/n), break down the door!

Gojo: Huh!?!

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): I never said I was gonna get back together with them. But I was thinking, they're in town, would it be the worst thing in the world if I gave them a call?

Itadori: No. No, (Y/n), it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. It would be the fourth worst thing. Number one: a super volcano. Number two: an asteroid hits the Earth. Number three: All the Evel Knievel movies are lost. Number four: (Y/n) calls Nanami. Number five: Gojo gets eaten by a shark.

Gojo: I’m Gojo, and I approve the order of that list.

——————————————————————————

Gojo: *tapping fingers on table*

Itadori: *taps fingers back furiously*

Nanami: …What’s going on?

(Y/n): Morse code. They’re talking.

Gojo: -.-- ..- .-. / - …. . / -.-. ..- - . … -

Itadori: *slams hands on table* YOU TAKE THAT BACK!

——————————————————————————

Nanami: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.

(Y/n): You are my reward.

*meanwhile*

Itadori: You deserve a reward for putting up with me.

Gojo: True, you can be really difficult at times.

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): I love them both, but how do I propose to two people?

Mohito : Two different restaurants, one person at each restaurant. Twice the dessert, twice the applause.

(Y/n): Won’t people think it’s weird if there is a third person just sitting there, though?

Mohito : I saw someone feed their pet peacock crème brûlée from their mouth at the French place on the corner last week: I think faux third-wheeling at an engagement is the least of your worries.

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): You don’t deserve me.

Mohito : At your worst or your best?

(Y/n): I don’t have a worst.

Mohito : Because you’re already at your worst?

——————————————————————————

(Y/n), texting Mohito : Hey do you like anyone?

Mohito : Yeah you

(Y/n): Oh, I'm sorry we're just friends

Mohito : *Yeah, you?

Mohito : Oh haha sorry lol

(Y/n): *dies inside*

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): We've got to find a way to cut down our expenses. What can we live without?

Itadori: Sukuna, probably.

Sukuna: watch it you little punk!

——————————————————————————

Sukuna: Comparing Itadori and (Y/n) is like comparing apples and oranges.

Itadori: We’re both unique in our own ways?

Sukuna: Apples are superior in every way and all oranges should be eliminated.

(Y/n): Which one of us is the orange?

——————————————————————————

Itadori: The best part of an oreo is the cookie part, not the frosting. Deal with it.

(Y/n): Darkness without light is an abyss. Light without darkness is blinding. You cannot have a coin with one side.

Sukuna: YO SOCRATES! IT'S A FUCKING COOKIE!

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): Guys, my friend here is bilingual.

Sukuna: Yes.

(Y/n): Which means they like both boys and girls.

Sukuna: Ye- wait, what-

Itadori: (Y/n), that's not what bilingual means-

(Y/n): Shhh, it's okay Sukuna. I still love you, man.

Sukuna & Itadori: ...

(Y/n): bUT NOT LIKE THAT-

——————————————————————————

*(y/n) and Itadori building a treehouse, after putting the last wall up*

Itadori: are we done?

(Y/n): almost just got to get the door nails *runs into wall with door drawn on it*

(Y/n): *slowly turns to look at Itadori* Itadori.

Itadori: what?

(Y/n) *motions with their head to the drawn on door* Itadori, where’s the door hole?

Itadori: it goes right there *points to drawn on door* see it drew it with a magic marker

(Y/n): you were supposed to cut it out with the power saw

Itadori: I’m gonna

(Y/n): oh really?

Itadori: yes

(Y/n): so go get the power saw *motions head towards the drawn on door*

Itadori: okay I will *walks right into drawn on door.

Itadori: *Knocks on drawn on door and begins looking around frantically* okay, I see the problem

(Y/n): oh, do ya?!

Sukuna: DUMBASSES!!

——————————————————————————

[darlingsfandom]

Calling Steve daddy taunting him as a joke until he yanks you into the bathroom and demands you say it again as he finger fucks you so good and talks you through it

do you live in my brain??

Gif credit: whoever made it/google images .

It was a joke, really it was! You were sitting with Steve and the rest of the group was sitting with you guys at the table in the corner of the back of the bar. You may or may not have snuck a few drinks of Nancy's fruity little drink. As the night went on Robin was talking about how she was promoted at Family Video and Nancy was talking about how she's having a hard time with English class in college. You already knew what Eddie and Steve were up to since you three lived together, well you and Steve lived together Eddie was the roommate who left his dirty dishes in the sink without rinsing them.

"Wow sounds like mommy and daddy huh!" Robin snorted as she elbowed you a little while looking at Eddie who was holding his beer in his hand.

"I mean Steve is Daddy!" Your cheeks flushed red as Steve gave you a daring glance. No one said a word for about five minutes before Nancy got up to order another round of drinks. You felt bad because now everyone was a bit weirded out and as soon as everyone finished that round. Eddie slapped Steve on the shoulder and said he'd see you guys at home. Both you and Steve sat there quietly for a minute before you got up to pay the tab, upon paying and giving a nice tip , you felt your arm being pulled and your feet scrapping slightly across the floor only to realize it was Steve dragging you into the bathroom.

You back was slammed against the stall as Steve gripped his hands around your neck. You loud gasp left your lips as he kissed you hard pushing his hands deeper into your neck only to let go suddenly allowing the breathe inside of you to stabilize again. "Daddy! You really had to tell all our friends about it?" Steve looked at you sternly as you felt small beneath him.

"I'm sorry but it's true! You're daddy and you know it. You're my daddy! And I'm your good girl !" You stomped your foot at him and Steve wasn't having it. He yanked your skirt down to your ankles and grinned when he noticed the wet spot on your panties.

"Good girls don't get this wet when they're in public with their friends." Steve ran his finger tips over the wet patch before pulling your panties down and sliding one finger inside of your wet folds. "And they sure as hell don't put their daddy on display like that when it's a secret!" Steve bit your neck hard before sliding in another finger. He gave you a second to adjust before he scissored you open and plunged his thick fingers in and out of you.

"Fuck fuck! I'm sorry okay! I love you! I love that your my daddy and I just people to know! Okay ! Fuck!" You whined and squirmed around before Steve wrapped his hand around your throat again giving it a tight squeeze. Your eyes rolled back into your head at the feeling of Steve's palm rubbing against your clit, fingers working over you and his warm lips against your own.

"I know you are sweet girl, but it was our secret!" He bit your bottom lip taking no mercy on how your pussy was aching from the roughness he was giving you. Your thighs started twitching as you gripped his wrist.

"Steve Steve STEVE! I .. fuck .. DADDY! Please!" You cried out making it echo off the dirty walls. "I'm gonna cum... I'm gonna fucking cum!"

"Do it baby! Be my good little whore that you are and fucking soak the floor! I know ya can!" Steve squeezed your mouth open to spit in it while you rubbed your clit with his thumb.

"Daddy. Daddy DADDY!! IM FUCK, FUCK IM CUM... OH MY GOD!" Your orgasm hit hard as Steve pulled his fingers out to focus on the fact you were gushing all over the floor and his shoes. "I CANT,STOP!" You were shaking as your stood there squirting looking at Steve who stood there with a grin on his face.

"Good. Look what a mess you made!" He yanked your hair and pulled you down until you were in a squatting position. "I should make you lick it off my shoe for being such a brat.... but this floor is more disgusting now... so I'll just have to let you walk out of here with a soaked ousts and no panties." Steve fixed you up a little before shoving you out the door and walking down the hall and you could feel everyone's eyes on you as you walked with Steve back outside to go home.

[before-it-felt-like-a-sin]

Cool About It

Summary: Natalie Scatorccio might be the meanest girl you know, and somehow, you've fallen for her.

Notes: please be kind this is my first fic! Not proofread. Also it's just a pretty slow burn.

"You should totally do it, y/n," Tai said to you from across the table, "I mean, you already know like half the team. And it's not like you have anything more important to do."

"Wow, Taissa. Wow. Maybe I do have more important things to do. Did you ever consider that?" You replied, taking a bite of your sandwich.

By 'it', you both meant managing the soccer team. Tai and Lottie had both been bugging you about it for months, essentially since school started. At first, it was to meet new people. Then, it was to hang out with them. Now, it's because you have nothing better to do.

"If by important, you mean spending your stepdad's money, then I guess you do have more important things to do."

"Rude, but fair. It's not my fault he gave me a credit card with no limit. Trying to buy my love or whatever."

You had moved to Wisayok at the beginning of your senior year, because your mom remarried, and your stepdad couldn't move because of his job. Coincidentally, it was also because of your stepdad that you met Lottie and Taissa. Lottie's dad and your stepdad were business partners, so you two were forced to hang out pretty often. Luckily, you got along well. Then Lottie introduced you to Tai, and you three had pretty much been inseparable since.

"Look, y/n, please just manage the team. What else are you gonna do when Lottie and I both have practice, huh?" She asks.

She kind of has you there. Sure, you have other friends, but they're either also on the soccer team, or not 'hang out outside of school' friends.

"Damn, really pulling the loser card on me are you." You replied with a look of mock-hurt on your face.

"If the shoe fits."

"Fine. I'll do it"

-----------------------------------------------------

"And this year, coming on as a new manager, is y/n y/l/n. I want you treating her with respect," coach Ben announced to the Yellowjackets on the first day of practice.

You looked around at the girls standing in front of you. Obviously, you knew Lottie and Tai. But you also knew Van. Mostly because of Taissa's insane crush on her, but you two also had a few classes together.

Shauna you also knew, but that was because you'd been paired up for a project in world history, and you got along pretty well. Jackie, of course, was team captain and Shauna's best friend. You didn't know much else about her, but she seemed fine.

Laura Lee, on the other hand, you decided to avoid at all costs. You knew she was religious as hell, and you didn't feel like being told that "god wanted you to be straight". Sure, Lottie told you that she was okay, but sometimes Lottie didn't have the best judgement.

That left Natalie. You had no idea what she was like. You knew she was friends with Van, but that was about it. Honestly, she kind of scared you.

"Hey! I'm y/n, nice to meet you all!" You said with a smile, attempting to look each of the girls in the eyes. Most of them just stared blankly back at you, but Shauna gave an encouraging smile.

This was going to be interesting.

-----------------------------------------------------

By the third week of attending practices, you'd figured most of the girls out.

Van was the team goofball. Constantly cracking jokes, trying to get people to laugh. The two of you clicked instantly, your humor just matched. You made it your lives mission to make fun of Taissa as often as possible.

Laura Lee was sweet, you had to admit, but she was a bit pushy in her religious thoughts. You weren't too upset, though. At least she hadn't tried to get you to date boys.

Shauna was just the sweetest. Definitely the team mom. She was the most welcoming to you when you were first getting started as manager, and you really appreciated it.

Jackie was a lot sometimes, but she also just believed so wholeheartedly in the team and their abilities. You admired that about her.

And Natalie? She was kind of a mess. But you felt inexplicably drawn to her. Maybe it was the messy hair, or her smudged eyeliner. Or maybe it was that you couldn't figure her out, but you wanted to.

"Y/n snap out of it. We have to leave soon," Lottie yelled at you.

"Oh shut it. I just have to put shoes on. Plus, it's a party. No one shows up on time." You replied, rolling your eyes.

"Yeah, but we have to pick up Van and Nat. And if we don't leave soon, we'll be too late for it to be socially acceptable." Taissa pulled on a jacket.

"You just want to see your girlfriend," you said, drawing out the word. Tai's brown skin flushed a dark pink. Everyone had noticed the two of them hanging out more and more. Of course, you were happy for them.

"Don't act like you don't look at Natalie like you want to bang her brains out. Tai's not the only one with a crush."

"Enough, both of you. We seriously have to leave." Tai's voice kept you from making a comment about Lottie and Laura Lee.

"Don't wanna keep your girlfriend waiting!"

"Shut it, y/n"

-----------------------------------------------------

"Y/n, Lottie, Tai, good evening ladies. Y/n, thank you for driving. I owe you my life." Van's voice bounced through your little sedan as she got into the car.

You laugh, throwing your head back a bit.

"Of course, Van. It gives me an excuse to not drink."

"Wait, you don't drink?" Nat asked, sounding like she thought you were insane.

"I don't drink at parties, at least not ones with a lot of people I don't know. It's not really my thing," you reply, attempting to keep your tone even. You knew that some people found your aversion to drinking odd, but honestly you didn't care.

"Damn Nat, don't insult the driver. She might just leave your ass," Van joked, quickly shifting the mood.

"Oh, she'll do it too," Lottie added, "I wouldn't test her."

"Maybe it's your ass I'd leave. Ever think of that?"

-----------------------------------------------------

You were standing in the kitchen, sipping a Diet Coke when Shauna walked up to you.

"Hey, y/n. I didn't really expect to see you here. You don't seem like the party type."

You smile at her. "I'm not. But Tai and Lottie roped me into it. I think they just wanted someone to drive them home, honestly."

Now it was Shauna's turn to smile at you. "I'm sure that's not the only reason."

"You're probably right about that."

"Where are they, anyway? You'd think after convincing you to come to a party they'd at least hang out with you."

"I seriously have no idea. I don't care though, as long as I can find them when it's time to leave."

"Let's go find them. Or at least one of them. You shouldn't be standing here alone at a party you didn't even want to go to."

"Shauna, you're being really nice and all, but you should go have fun. I don't mind being here alone."

"Are you sure? Because if not I could-" before Shauna could finish, Natalie walked up to the both of you.

"Shauna, leave the poor girl alone." Natalie leaned up against the kitchen counter.

"Don't be a bitch, Nat."

"Hey, let's not fight in the kitchen. Nat's right, though, Shauna. You don't have to stay here with me."

"You sure?"

"Absolutely. Plus, now I have found someone to talk to." You gesture towards Natalie and smile at Shauna. She looks as if she's not totally sure if she's believes you, but she walks away anyway.

Once she's out of sight, you turn to Nat. "Thanks for saving me, but you didn't have to be mean to her. She just wants to make sure everyone's having a good time."

She scoffs, "that wasn't mean."

You roll your eyes, "sure," you say, and turn to walk away.

"Hey, wait."

"Dude, I know you don't really want to spend your time here talking to me. You don't have to pretend like you do."

For a moment, Natalie almost looks hurt. Before you can tell for sure, her face changes and she's smirking at you.

"You're right. Go find Lottie and follow her around like a puppy. I know that's what you want to do anyway."

You don't even dignify her with a response, and just walk away for real this time. You spot Lottie from across the room, and almost walk over to her, but then you remember Nat's words. They shouldn't have affected you the way they did, but you look back to see if Natalie's watching you.

When you turn around, she looks you right in the eyes and smirks, almost daring you to go over there. Part of you wants to, to prove that you don't care what she thinks. The other part wants to show her that you don't just exist around Lottie.

After a few minutes of internal struggle, the latter part wins out. You turn away from Lottie, and walk towards the back porch, hoping to spot Tai or Van.

Luckily for you, Van wasn't far away. You make your way over to her, half hoping that Natalie is still watching you. You want to show her that you do have friends, and she can fuck all the way off.

"Hey, y/n, enjoying your first Wisayok party? Isn't it grand? Everything you hoped it would be and more?" Van asked, obviously messing with you.

"Oh yeah. Shitty music. Shittier company. My ideal Friday night."

Van laughs. "I'm honestly surprised you even came. Tai talks about how much you hate things like this all the time."

"What do I talk about?" Tai approached the both of you, handing a cup of what you assumed to be beer to Van.

"How anti-party y/n is."

"I'm not anti-party. I'm ant-most of the people at them."

"God, you sound like Natalie. I swear you two would get along so well if she gave you a chance," Van said.

"I don't think she wants to give me a chance. Honestly I don't care. If she wants to believe I'm some perfect stuck-up little princess, I don't give a shit. She doesn't know me." You take another sip of your drink.

"She doesn't think that. Everyone knows you're not stuck up. She just doesn't like new people very much." Van looked at Taissa, as if for confirmation.

"Van's right. She didn't speak to like half the team until halfway through the season our freshman year. Although, I'm still not totally sure she's warmed up to everyone. She might still hate Jackie."

"Fabulous. Jackie and I can start a club."

"Y/n." Tai gave you a look that would make even a tree wither.

"Can you imagine that? Me and Jackie starting a 'Natalie hates us' club?"

"I'm sure Jackie has much better things to do. I also don't think Natalie hates you. I think you kind of intimidate her," Van said offhandedly, as if that was widely known information.

"Yeah, my great tits and winning personality intimidate Natalie Scatorccio, who half the time shows up to class high, or drunk, or both. I'm pretty sure I couldn't intimidate a worm. Much less Nat." You laugh, trying to imagine Natalie being intimidated by you.

"Maybe not the personality, but definitely the tits."

"Why are we talking about y/n's tits? Do I want to know?" Lottie asked.

"Those two are talking about how intimidated Natalie is by them. Which, if we're judging by how she was staring earlier, I'd agree," Taissa answered.

"Okay, new topic. Can we leave?" You asked the three of them, hoping for a yes. "We can even go back to my place. I just don't want to be here."

"We have to find Nat, but sure," replied Lottie, speaking for the group.

"Do we have to?"

"Y/n, I was joking about leaving her ass when we were in the car. She'd kill me if we left."

"Ugh"

"Come on, loser," said Tai.

-----------------------------------------------------

Drunk Natalie was both fun, and your worst nightmare.

"I'm just saying, Nirvana is the best. Nothing and no one beats them. Nothing. And. No one." Van had to support all of her weight, and essentially threw her into the passenger seat of your car.

"I don't want her getting carsick in the back." Van's look almost made you forgive her. Almost.

"I won't get carsick."

"Tell that to the back of Tai's car."

"Okay, assholes. Enough. Get in. Get buckled. Does anyone need me to drop them off, or are we going back to mine?" You ask.

They all chorus 'no's', so you put the car into gear and check that everyone's seatbelts are on. All three in the back seem to be secured, so you turn to Nat. As expected, she hasn't put hers on.

"Natalie, this car doesn't move until you put that seatbelt on.

"Why do you even care?" She glares at you, and it takes everything in you to not hit her.

"Because I don't want anyone to die. Even assholes like you. Don't make me do it for you."

She looks like she wants to defy you again, but she then sees the look on your face and thinks better of it. Soon enough, she's buckled in, and you can finally start your drive home.

"I can't believe we're finally seeing the princess's castle."

Yep. Drunk Natalie was your worst nightmare.

"I can take you home right now. Don't think I won't."

"Oh, I know you will. I just like fucking with you. I like seeing you all pissed off."

"Hi, Nat, it's me, Van, your best friend. Please remember there are other people in the car before flirting with y/n. Thanks." You heard all three of the girls in the back giggling, and your face flushed.

"That wasn't flirting, dumbass. Generally, flirting is done when you like someone."

"Why doesn't drunk Natalie shut the hell up?" You ask, feeling so many different things. On one hand, Natalie was flirting with you, right? She had to be. On the other, why would she flirt with you? She hated you. Unless she really was intimidated by you. God, when you got home you were definitely breaking your 'no drinking' rule.

"Okay, Princess. Whatever you say"

"I said shut up"

-----------------------------------------------------

"Never have I ever... fallen for my best friend," Van asked, waiting for someone to take a drink.

For what felt like the millionth time tonight, you were the only one to drink. You guessed it was fair, since you needed to catch up to everyone else. But damn, this vodka was gross.

"Wait, really? Who?" Van looked at you, waiting for a response.

"Someone back home. Her name was Molly. We're still friends, too. She's pretty and blonde, and a little bit of a mess. We just fit in the right way. Didn't work out though. I was a bitch, and I fucked up for a while." You didn't know why you said all of that. That was normally something you kept incredibly close to your chest.

"So not Lottie?" Natalie asked, slurring a bit. You should've just taken her back to her place, but something kept you from doing it. You really regretted that choice now.

"Fuck off. I'm done playing." You get up and stumble a bit, but then gain your balance, "feel free to keep going, but I'm going to bed."

"You aren't gonna share your bed, Princess?"

"Natalie, I will make you sleep outside. Fuck the fuck off."

"God, I was just messing with you. Chill out."

"Okay guys, let's not be hostile. Y/n, go to bed. Honestly, we all should," said Lottie. You shot her a grateful look, and attempted to make your way up the stairs. You didn't make it very far before you face planted. Apparently you had drank more than you thought.

"Shit, y/n, you okay?" Tai shot up from where she was sitting on the floor.

"Fine. I might just sleep on the couch. Apparently I can't walk up the stairs."

Tai and Van help you make your way to the couch, and give you one of the throw blankets. Soon enough, you're passed out.

-----------------------------------------------------

You wake up, and it takes you a second to figure out where you are. Then it hits you like a ton of bricks. Literally, your head is pounding, and you remember what happened.

As you sat up, you looked around for you friends. The only person you saw, though, was Natalie. That's when you saw the note. You picked it up, and read it.

'Hey y/n, I took Lottie and Van home, but you and Nat were both still out cold. Sorry I left her, but hungover, tired Natalie isn't something I wanna deal with' -Tai.

God fuck. What a great way to start your day. After a few minutes of agonizing, you decided to get your ass up and make breakfast. You padded to the kitchen and poured yourself a cup of iced coffee, and got out the waffle maker. If you were gonna have to deal with Natalie hungover, you were gonna at least do it caffeinated.

While the waffle maker heated up, you did a quick change into sweats and an old t-shirt, and you washed yesterday's makeup off your face.

By the time you walked back downstairs, the waffle maker was ready, and you began working on the batter while sipping your coffee.

After a while, you heard rustling of blankets in your living room. Soon enough, Natalie was standing in the doorway of your kitchen. Silently, you gestured to the island where you set out a cup of coffee for her.

She walked over and sat down. Smiling softly at you, she picked up the coffee and took a sip.

"I'm making waffles, if you want one."

"Sure."

The way her voice rasped nearly made you drop your cup. Something about it made you want to listen to it forever.

Somehow, you reeled yourself in. Your crush on her was pointless. She hated you. Your waffles weren't going to change that.

For a while, the both of you sat in near silence. She said thank you for the waffle, but that was the extent of your breakfast conversation.

"I should probably leave soon."

"Yeah, sure. Just let me grab my shoes and I can take you."

"It's fine, I can walk."

"You absolutely cannot. It's like 3 miles. And you're wearing platforms."

"I don't need your help."

"I either take you home or you don't leave."

"Why do you even care? I'm nothing but an ass to you, yet you still act like we're friends. Clearly, we're not." Her face is hard, and it takes a lot for you to not cry.

"God fuck, Natalie. Heaven forbid I just be a good person." You stare at her, trying to get her to understand, or at least listen to you.

"I don't want you to be good to me."

"Why. Why not. I try to be good to everyone. Why are you different?" You're nearly yelling now.

"Because, y/n, I don't deserve it."

"Fuck you, Natalie. Fuck you. I'm taking you home. That's it." You walk over to her and look at her in her eyes.

She stares right back. "No, y/n, you're not." She makes a move to get up and walk away, but you grab her wrist and pull her back.

For a moment, she looks like she's going to hit you. Instead, what comes next is completely unexpected. She leans in and kisses you. While you're stunned into silence, that's when she makes her escape.

"I'm leaving, y/n. See you at school on Monday."

-----------------------------------------------------

Two days. Two days of sitting in your house, not talking to anyone. Wondering what Natalie was doing. Waiting for her to call. But why would she call. She didn't owe you one. She just kissed you to get you to leave her alone, right? She didn't really like you, right?

You managed to make it through the entire school day without seeing Natalie, and you couldn't tell if it was a blessing or a curse. But you knew you couldn't avoid her at practice. That she couldn't avoid you at practice.

Throughout the whole practice, you watched her. You watched her run drills. You watched her 1v1 Lottie. You watched her scrimmage the JV team. And you watched her not watch you at all.

Finally, practice was over. You hurried to help coach put everything away, hoping to catch Natalie before she left. As you walked to the locker room, you spotted her.

"Natalie, hey, Nat, wait!" You ran over to her, waving. She just kept walking.

"Natalie, come on. We need to talk."

"About what, y/n?" Her tone was icy, and you didn't know why. She was the one who left you.

"Don't do this. Just come with me. Please."

"What am I getting out of this?"

"I don't know, Nat. What does it matter. If you don't like what I have to say, I'll leave you alone. For real." At that, she turns around and looks at you.

"Fine. Where are we going?"

"My car, I guess. Come on, it's over here." The two of you walk in silence to where you're parked, and you unlock the doors. Simultaneously, you both get in.

"What do you want to talk about, y/n?" She sounds bored.

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that you fucking kissed me, and then ignored me all weekend. I thought you might be dead, Natalie." Your voice was hard, but there was an underlying sadness to it.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you I made it home," she joked, expecting you to laugh, or at least roll your eyes.

"Don't be a bitch, you know that isn't all."

"Fine. The kiss wasn't anything. Is that better? I don't have feelings for you. Don't worry about that." Her voice isn't joking anymore.

"Fuck you, Natalie. I can't believe you literally just kissed me to get me to leave you alone. God. Using my crush on you to your advantage like that." You turn away from her, not wanting her to see you tear up.

"Wait. You have a crush on me?" Her voice softens, and you see in the window reflection that she moves to touch your hand, but then seems to think better of it.

"Fucking obviously. Clearly you don't feel the same, which is fine, but you don't have to use me like that."

"Shit, y/n, I'm sorry. I..." she trails off, and you wait for her to finish.

"You what, Natalie? Hm? I can't deal with your bullshit right now. Get out with it."

This time, she does make a move to touch you. She places one hand on yours, and moves the other to the side of your face.

"I lied."

"What?"

"About not having feelings for you." With this, she uses the hand on your face to turn your head towards her. For a moment, you just look at each other, drinking everything in, before she speaks quietly.

"Can I kiss you, for real this time?"

"Yes." Your voice is barely a whisper, but as soon as she has her permission, her lips are on yours. You thread your fingers into her blonde waves, and both of her hands cup your face.

You sit like that for what seems like hours, just kissing and kissing, only stopping to come up for air. You know your lipgloss had to have smeared, but you can't bring yourself to care.

Eventually, though, you stop. When she pulls away, it takes everything in you not to force her lips back on yours.

"That's why I've been such a bitch to you. Because I have feelings for you. And I don't know what to do with them." She almost sounds small saying that, the admission seeming so unlike her.

"Hm. I know how you can make it up to me."

[muniimyg]

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹ teacher assistant!jimin ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹

series m.list // taglist request: closed

🏷️ permanent taglist: @joonsjuice @taetaecatboy @pb-n-juju @miss-rainy-days @firesighgirl @whoa-jo @vantxx95 @pamzn @kakixaku @casspirit0705 @tae165 @defzcl @sopebubbles @leefics @ggukkieland @bebebutbetter @yoongimentita7 @boraength @era-genius @4ksj @vampcharxter @miss-jupiter @floweryjeons @taegijns @jeonqkooks-main @rrosiitas @jkslvsnella @parkinglot-nights @kissyfacekoo

//

teacher assistant!jimin always grades your paper first so it'll be last in the pile when he gives them out the next day. oh and let’s not forget the golden star he puts on your paper. it’s an inside joke…. kind of. from the corner of his eye, he would watch as you anxiously wait for him to call your name. alas, when he finally does; he dismisses everyone else. as everyone packs up and leaves, you happily skip to him and thank him for his notes on your draft. he smiles warmly and tells you, "you deserve it. you worked hard." you laugh. ���just say my writing is your favourite.” jimin rolls his eyes but agrees. “yes, ___. your writing is my favourite.” then, just as you're about to flatter him, your best friend tugs you over and whines, "how many more A's are you gonna give ___? kinda offensive since she's more of a D cup—"

teacher assistant!jimin never really knows what your schedule is like. every day, you have something to do after his class. today, as you're rushing to leave, you take a moment to stop in front of his desk and open your bag. you take out a container filled with cookies. "i made these for you!" you begin. "i hope you're not allergic to nuts... they're white macadamia cookies. i think i saw you eating one before class the other day s-so i just thought—" he takes them. "thank you. they look good." you take a breath in and giggle. "g-good. i... uhm, i have to get going b-but yeah.. enjoy the cookies, jimin." when you leave, he smiles to himself and takes a cookie out of the baggie. he bites into it, and thinks to himself... this is the best cookie he has ever eaten.

teacher assistant!jimin saves the last few cookies for the evening. on his way home, he bumps into nam joon. "oh, you got cookies too?" nam joon beams, as he takes a baggie of cookies out of his hoodie pocket. nam joon gives jimin a toothy smile. "is it ta appreciation day or something? did ___ give you some too? she's cute, huh? i didn't know she was taking a class of yours." jimin feels his chest tighten. why did nam joon get cookies too? didn't you make these just for him? you mentioned knowing it was his favourite. white chocolate macadamia nut cookies are not nam joon's favourite. in all honesty, jimin isn't sure what is nam joon's favourite but it just can't be his favourite. because those fucking cookies aren't for him. oh. jimin is pissed. trying to keep it together, he answered nam joon; "she takes my 10AM." nam joon munches on his cookie. "that's cool. she's in my 12PM—ah, shit. is this white chocolate macadamia? isn't this your favourite? i'm more of an oatmeal chocolate chip kind of guy but this is sooo fucking good." jimin's lips curve into a half smile. so... the cookies must've really been for him—"i bet the others really like this cookie though. she has that jin guy as her professor professor and you know what all the girls here say about him—" nam joon swallows the rest of the cookie. "he likes girls with D cups."

teacher assistant!jimin would be the pettiest little shit to you the next time he sees you. he’d ignore you as you walked in and said good morning to him. then, every time you raised your hand, he’d pick someone who didn’t even have their hand raised. at all costs, he was avoiding eye contact with you. like what??? rude…. also, he gave you your paper FIRST. there wasn’t even any written feedback. no. gold. star. yet, you have to give him some credit. at least his bitter feelings towards you didn’t effect your—a D????? he gave you a D????? this is WRONG. this is unacceptable. as the class is dismissed, you gather your things to talk to him. jus as you approach him, he swings his bag over his bag and bumps into you. “oh shit, sorry—“ “i got a D.” “yeah… that sucks.” with a frown, you confront him. “you’ve never given me a D.” “it was nothing personal, ms. ___… your writing lacked. it wasn’t good. anyways, i gotta get going. i’ll see you next class. if you really want, take it up with prof. he takes re-submissions for one assignment per student.” as he moves past you, under your breath you huff; “nothing personal? bullshit.”

teacher assistant!jimin doesn’t know what to do when you yell his name in the middle of campus. at first, he wants to believe it’s all his head. so, he continues to walk away. but then… everyone starts to turn their heads and look at him… why? because of you. you’re storming to him with no thoughts—just a tired heart. “jimin!” you yell with the kind of tone that has everyone intimidated. finally, he stops. he turns around and stands still as you approach him. you huff, “did i do something?” he tilts his head at you. “what?” you roll your eyes at him, shoving your paper to his chest. “d stands for did i do something.” jimin takes your paper and shrugs. “ms. ___, like i said… take it up with prof. i’m clocked out—“ “bullshit.” “ms.___—“ “oh my god, jimin! you know my name. you have my number—which is a waste since i’m still waiting for you to text me—and you always look at me in class like you could—“ jimin grabs your wrists and drags you to a tree nearby. at least here, people would have to squint to watch what happens next. “let go—“ you shake his grip off of you. he glares at you in return. “if you have a problem with me, figure it out. drop out of the class, talk to the prof or—“ “we’re almost finished the sem, why the hell would i drop this class—“ jimin hates this. he feels like he could hate you. “i don’t have time to deal with you acting like a child—“ in disbelief, you poke his chest. “like a child? oh come on! i spend all my class time looking at you with heart eyes and my free time baking you cookies. my writing is your favourite. there’s no way it deserved a D. also, i’ve been waiting for like… EVER. waiting for your text—now, on a random wednesday morning—you think i’m a child? now? really? are you mad at me or something—“ he gulps. “yes.” your eyes widen. “yes?” jimin sighs, letting himself sound ridiculous, “yes. i’m mad at you. you do all that shit and have these cute conversations with me—and then do this whole cookie gesture… but it wasn’t for me.” “what are you talking about?” “you made cookies for all your ta’s.” you hold back your smile. “that’s it? you gave me a D because you were jealous? over cookies?” jimin hisses and just as he’s about to turn and walk away from you, you run up in front of him. “hey, hey, hey,” you giggle. “i didn’t lie. i made those cookies for you. the other girls i have class with made their own batch and gave them out to their ta’s. is this about nam joon? i only gave him cookies because there were the uglier ones and i wanted to suck up to him… he’s your friend. i want your friends to like me.” jimin raises a brow. “what about jin? isn’t he your favourite?” you shrug. “you’re my favourite.” jimin chuckles, not believing your truth. trying to convince him, you plead with your eyes. “and what’s this all about? like, what about him? he gave me the recipe. he told me your favourite cookie. said we’d be cute together so he wanted to help me out. god, are you actually this jealous? is it bad that i’m really into it?” jimin’s heart skips a beat. ”s-so… you have a crush on me or something?” you throw your head back, laughing at his cuteness. wrapping your arms around him, you tiptop and kiss his cheek. “depends. can you reconsider my D while i consider yours?”

[shelbgrey]

Next to me(Emmett Cullen)

Chapter 19: they're vampires y/n!

A/n: sorry this is short and pretty late.

Table of contents

My door slammed opened the next morning, jolting awake. “huh?” I said trying to control my pounding heart.

“they're vampires y/n!” Bella said coming into my room panicked. I gave her a strange look not fully awake.

“who are are vampires?” I asked. Bella grabed my shoulders setting me up in my bed. She shook me a bit. “Edward and Emmett!”

my brain literally went, 'oh yeah... They are vampires' I chuckled “you just got that?”

Bella's eyes widened and she let go of me making me fall back in my bed. “you knew?!”

I set up on my elbows and smirked. “remind me nerve to tell you a secret”

Bella sighed and looked out the window just as Emmett's jeep rolled up. I claimed out of bed and threw some clothes on for school. I jogged down the stairs as Emmett walked into the house.

“Sherlock cracked the case” I mumbled. Emmett's golden eyes widened.

“I won't say anything” Bella said hiding behind me. I rolled my eyes and moved out of the way. “yeah, you can't you aren't even supposed to know” Emmett said.

“she's knows” Bella said pointing to me. “that's different” I said.

Not wanting to reveal anything, Emmett took my hand and we walked outside to his jeep. Emmett rolled his eyes as he turned on the engine and drove to school.

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

“your gonna get an ear full from Bella today” I said to Edward as we walked to Geometry. He shrugged not really bothered.

“Alice had a vision last night, so I'm not surprised” he said handing me a math text book from the back shelf in the classroom.

“what are you gonna tell her?” I asked setting down at the table. “I don't know” he sighed.

“she bought this book in Port Angeles and she stayed up all night doing research...she has a pretty good idea about you” I mumbled.

Edward rolled his eyes as he got out the homework we did a couple of days ago. “you don't have to tell her anything, ya know” I mumbled.

“I don't want to lie to her... Emmett didn't lie to you” Edward mumbled. “I'm a different story, I knew from the start”

“dose bella know about the whole wolf thing?” he asked quietly. I shook my head no. “Owen doesn't either... He knows the leadgens, but he doesn't believe them”

“ms. Swan and Mr. Cullen, please pay attention this will be on your test next week��� Mr. Booth said interrupting our conversation. Not wanting to cause trouble we shut up and communicated by passing notes to each other the rest of the class.

At lunch Bella was determined to get to the bottom of what ever my boyfriends Family was hiding. Me and Emmett sat down at the Cullen's lunch table getting ready to play uno with Jasper and Damon. Damon was determined to beat Emmett at this game of chance. As Emmett was shuffling the cards Bella came up behind Edward.

“we need to talk” he sighed and followed her out of the cafeteria. “hope do don't get Murdered!” I shouted.

Bella told me to shush like I was talking to her. Edward turned around and gave me a slight smile. We started the game and about five rounds(Damon won none) he was just bewildered. He had about 20 cards in his hands and he slammed his head on the table.

“I don't understand” he wined. I laughed once I threw my last card down, winning that round.

“do you think he's gonna tell her?” Rosalie asked getting annoyed with the subject at had. I shrugged as I dealed out cards for the next round. “I don't know, if he doesn't she's just gonna figure it for herself... She might not have much of a personality but she's a lot smarter than people give her credit for” I said.

After I got my cards I shifted so I was leaning my back in Emmett's massive bicep and I propped my feat on Edward's empty chair.

“do you want to come to the house this weekend?” Alice asked. I thought for a moment, making sure I didn't have anything going on. “Sure, Owen might have to tag along though... He doesn't like being left alone”

“that's perfect, Esme wants to meet him anyway” Alice smiled. I nodded as I placed a +4 card, making Jasper draw some cards.

Once it was Alice's turn she didn't do anything. She zoned out having a vision. “What did you see Alice?” Jasper asked setting his cards down.

“Bella knows... He told her everything” Alice said. Rosalie slammed her cards down making them slide acrossed the table. “everything?!”

“just what we are... Carlisle changing Esme and him... That's about it” Alice mumbled. “she asked about You and Emmett, but he said it was your job to explain” she said looking at me.

I sighed. “I don't even know what to tell her... Far as she's concerned I'm human” I said as I collected Rosalie's cards and handed them back.

“Edward is gonna want to bring her home... We should do something nice” Stefan suggest. Rosalie quickly shook her head at her brother-in-law. “absolutely not, let's not help her get attached”

“we could cook for her I guess... That's a normal human thing to do for people” Damon said. “ow” he suddenly growled and looked at Rosalie.

“don't encourage your brother” she said sternly.

“anyway... you want to study for our English test tonight?” I asked Emmett. He looked at me and smirked as he probably was thinking of something along the lines of not studying.

“at your place? Is your uncle gonna be home?” he asked cheekily. I shoved him playfully. “no, but Owen will be”

“shucks... But yeah we could study” he then flashed me another suggestive smirk. “I'm a great study buddy”

“keep it PG... We don't need any little Emmetts running around” Jasper joked.

Emmett snorted and chuckled. “like that would ever happen”

Even if it was a joke I now relized me and Emmett couldn't start a family of our own. Sure we could adopt, but I couldn’t have a child that was purely our creation. I thought about a little boy or girl with his smile and dimples. I questioned if the kid would be tall like Emmett or short like me, would the kid phase like me or be strong like Emmett.

I was thankful the Rosalie was the only one who noticed my sudden mood change. She gave me a soft smile and placed her hand on top of my free one, she gave it a comforting squees before the Bell rang.

~~~~~~~~(.......)~~~~~~~~

“did I upset you at lunch today?” Emmett asked as he pulled out his English book from his bag. I turned away from my book shelf and gave him a confused look.

“what do you mean?” he sighed and put a pencil inside his text book so he wouldn't lose his place. “when Jasper said we didn't need any little mes running around... I said like that would ever happen... You looked upset and I didn't want to ask infront of everyone” Emmett explained.

I shrugged and took my spot next to him on my bed. “I hadn't really thought about kids honestly... I mean would love to be a mom”

Emmett looked down with remorse. I've seen him happy, exited, pissed, but I have yet to see any sadness in those golden eyes. “I'm sorry...”

I quickly shook my head and placed my hand on the side of his jaw. “don't be sorry” I turned his head so our eyes could meet.

“maybe in the future... When we're ready we could adopt or something... You don't have to be sorry about anything, I have you and that's all that matters”

He leaned forward and kissed me softly, he pulled away and rested his forehead on mine. “What did I do to deserve someone as amazing as you?”

I chuckled softly and nuzzled my nose against his. “I love you Em”

“I love you too” he smiled as he pulled me to his chest. After a moment of silence I slipped out of his arms and grabed his text book.

“okay, studding” I said getting comfortable between his legs and rested my back to his chest. He chuckled. “I honestly thought you were joking”

“unlike you I actually have to study and graduate” I joked. “I can just give you the awnsers, I've seen it all” he said closing the book.

I opened it back up. “that's cheating” I said opening it back up. “well your stuck with me the rest of eternity, so that means many centuries of more school so I doesn't matter” he said closing the text book yet again.

I sighed and threw my head back on his shoulder. “your not gonna let me study, are you?”

Me leaned down and kissed my forehead. “maybe later”

I playfully rolled my eyes and closed the book, so I could give him the attention he so desperately wanted.

[halfetirosie]

🔥😅♨️ #SquadGoals ♨️😅🔥

(Exercise 10 - 13 React-os!)

1) OH SHIT, THE PROPHECY IS TRUE!!!

✨ THEY'RE GONNA LET QUINCY GRILL!!!!!! ✨

His Dad Energy™ will be off-the-charts!!!

2) PFFFT!!! 😂

You're getting too predictable, Dante!

Nah but, it will never stop being adorable how well Eiden knows his bois.

Plus, Eiden worked Dante-Teasing™ into his explanation so seamlessly, he doesn't even give him time to react before moving on! Outstanding move! 👌

3) Blade's Robo Abilities validating all the fanfic writers once again--

Kinda interesting that Yakumo gets nervous on boats. Maybe it's just because he's never been on one before? Or because it's so different from his natural environment, he instinctually dislikes it? 🤔

4) The return of Peepaw Kuya that canonically hates water!!! 🤣🤣🤣

He's gonna do his Ghost Bullshit of popping up behind him any second now, just watch-

Yup, that's our boi! 😂 Looks like Kuya's getting too predictable, too!

Kuya's like the fuckin Lord Voldemort of this universe. Don't say his cursed name!!!

5) That's kinda funny--- they accidentally re-created the Pokemon Starter Trio (except instead of Yaku for fire/red it's Dante)!

BRUH.

If I ever had to compete against their team--even if I were physically on-par with them--I would be hella intimidated. 2 of the 3 of them are insanely competitive by nature, and all three of them are workaholics that treat everything seriously. 😨

Not to mention, knowing my luck, I'd get stuck on a team with one slacker and one...shall I say....under-skilled person. Just, based on my history with college group projects... 😭😭😭

6) I am suddenly reminded of the crazy Australians/Floridians that wrestle crocodiles...on purpose...

(⊙ - ⊙)

...I better see fanart of this scene, or else I'll be disappointed!

I can't even blame Eiden for his awe at this weird-ass/random/kinda-funny situation, cuz I'm right there with him!

Also, Impromptu Fish-Wrestling is cool and all, but when do we get to see Quincy grill???

7) 🚨 I CALL BULLSHIT!!! 🚨

Pleaseeee. ( - _ - )

You expect me to believe that Garu and Yakumo, with their yokai-senses, would actually get caught off-guard by a random animal or something? Or that Kuya would honestly believe that??? Him, the one constantly hyping up yokai and their superiority????

...Yeah, that too. Kuya ain't that nice.

He's 100% the smartass lazy kid in the group project that shoves all the real work onto the other members, while pretending that the task they chose is actually difficult/time consuming when it actually can be completed in 5 minutes.

8) Always a fan of 🐾 Cat Dad Dante 🐾 moments! ♡♡♡

I'm also a huge fan of Sooley's thematic accessories!!!

I fuckin called it, dude!!! I knew Dante was jealous of Topper getting to have stylish outfits!!!! (And on that note---who made Sooley's lil' bandana? Eiden, I assume? 🤔)

9) Leave it to Dante & Co. to militarize cooking! 🤣🤣🤣

(ㆁ△ㆁ)

I mean, look at this shit! How are they so insanely coordinated?? Did they practice the choreography?????

10) (◔_◔)

Dante, babes, this situation isn't serious enough to justify one of your classic cheesy one-liners...

(Has anyone else ever commented on that? How Dante says a ton of cringey shit (affectionate) that sounds like it came straight out of an anime?)

--That won't distract me from his impressive skills, tho. I mean, I already knew he had some cooking knowledge from Frozen Echoes (in that side-stroy where he goes ice fishing and then cooks the fish with Karu, Blade, and Eiden).

But this isn't just the rudimentary "cook a thing over a fire until it's not raw anymore" sort of situation---this is an actual understanding of how to cook something and why you should use certain methods for the best results.

My mans is fun to tease, but honestly, he deserves more credit!

Go off, king! I'm proud of you!!! ♡♡♡♡♡

11) ---*snort*---

I'm sure this is still a compliment to Dante, but Eiden just can't resist goofing on him, huh? (≧∇≦)

🔥 End of report! 🔥

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 16 thoughts

damn. this was another episode i had to stretch out over TWO DAYS because a storm RUDELY interrupted me, but to say i was at the edge of my seat was an understatement. i was entirely invested. every beat was excellent. and most of my notes were asking the question: what is going on? so join me as i walk you through every single time i was confused (but in a good way)

so i read the synopsis and saw there was a mulder's sister mention........ interesting....

it opens with mulder monologuing about his quest in life to find the truth, and i'm into it, and then we see a helicopter... but it's HIM in the helicopter being medevaced?? so this monologue must be taking place at a later date? or is a sort of cosmic narration of his coma thoughts??

he is beat to hell and back and they are putting him in a TUB

scully bursts onto the scene and they try to be like "who are you" and she is NOT playing around, she's all "there's no time for this, a man is dying" queen.......

so he's still going on- either cosmically or in a sort of post-event narration- about "what happened on the ice" justifying his every belief. and also that he thinks that aliens are HERE and they are COLONIZING? which i feel is a bit of a jump. like aliens being a thing, okay, possible. colonizing earth? i mean, also possible, but like... don't they have better things to do?

they have him in the tub to prevent hypothermia but scully is yelling that THE COLD IS KEEPING HIM ALIVE and i'm wondering if she knows that because 1. it's obvious medical knowledge and she is simply out-doctoring these other doctors or 2. they're doing what you would normally do for a patient in these circumstances, but she knows there has been some sort of alien fuckery that needs to be addressed in a different manner

then, right as we hear that HIS HEART STOPPED, we get the little spooky song and the intro. my notes consisted of: HUH?? WHAT IS GOING ON??????

okay. jump back in time. two weeks earlier. yeah let's figure out what led up to this.

(i do get hooked when we jump right into the heart of the matter though. as a plot device i will be Sat for this convention sorry)

but my notes were still lingering on what i had just seen. first, that his face was broken as hell, and that makeup must have been unpleasant, and i can't imagine that being filmed being placed in a tub was much fun either

BUT, on the other hand, i think it's good that we're evening out the scales of each character almost dying. while he did get kidnapped in the s1 finale and almost die in the s2 premiere, scully's coma arc was a lot more dramatic, so it is good that it was his turn. we need to see them worried about each other in equal measure.

okay okay. back to the start of the episode. for real. two weeks before this whole ice bathing event, a ufo sort of thing crashed above a ship in the arctic. and the news is saying that a russian agent was rescued from a ship crash. because you can't just say it was a ufo.

cutscene to a women's health center in scranton. and my first thought was, please do not say we are gonna see some character come in with an alien pregnancy. and thankfully that is not where that went. because s2 is too early for that. work up to it a little bit, you know?

the doctor at the health center is watching the news, and he clearly recognizes the man they are shown being lifted from the crash. and he goes to run out the room.

oh? as soon as he escapes from the room.... he is being BEATEN by the dude he just saw on the tv. OH??? BIG NEEDLES???? foaming with green liquid??? the place is set on fire after that?? we have seen these needles with liquid used on aliens before....

dude, what's going on, i wrote in my notes... the girls are scared

okay, so here's what we have so far: three doctors who perform abortions have had their clinics set on fire, and their obituaries forwarded to mulder

(at this point, we see the credits which i'm used to ignoring, but this one has more names on it.... because DAVID wrote the story with MR. CARTER???? okayyyyy putting that yale degree to WORK!!!!!)

wait. we get visuals on the three newly deceased doctors. and they. all have the same face??? and no records on them at all.

they go to visit a suspect, who had a "have you seen this man" ad in his pocket for a local newspaper, so they go to that city and try to investigate

she thinks it's a setup because they have been given weirdly little information, and he thinks there are more doctors out there with the same face that need rescuing... lowkey agreeing with her but i know how these plot devices play out. so.

she's calling the number they gave her and serving looks on the phone, work, but a tip has been made that the next guy is in syracuse, so they're off on a new york road trip

an fbi agent is sent off to the scene, and we see the next same-faced doctor in syracuse, where he is talking with someone about "sharing the planet"... but. well. here's what my notes had to say:

"NOOOO MORE GOO... THE DOCTOR DISSOLVED AND THE BULLETS AREN'T DOING ANYTHING TO THE KILLER? BUT THE GAS IS KILLING THE AGENT... LIKE WE SAW IN THAT EPISODE WITH THE GUY WHO COULD GO UNDERWATER!!"

so we see the fbi agent is very dead, but then he comes right back on screen, and we are dealing with a shapeshifter!!!!! the dead guy has been placed in the trunk of a car with some funky markings on his face. using the likeness of the dead fbi agent, he tells our duo that there was nothing to see at the address they located. and the killer shapeshifts again, leaving me thinking about how cool being a shapeshifter would be.

cut to skinner cam, who has become something like a strange cousin to me. he is PISSED that mulder went on a side quest without his permission because an agent DIED but mulder is very confused because he talked to the agent and he was very much alive? (but it was actually the shapeshifter, of course) and for once mulder is too stunned to speak

scully is at hooooome checking her compuuuuter and she is wearing a flannel!!!!! yes casual wear let's hear it for comfortably scully!!! make some noise!!!

despite looking very comfortable she is not pleased because someone sent her a disturbing email, and she wants to know if mulder got one, too- it's another of the same faced doctors, and this one is in washington. right in their area!

on his way over to her apartment, we run into.... A NEW CHARACTER???? his name is ambrose chapel, and he is allegedly from the CIA... do we trust him? what was he doing outside her place.

they go into scully's apartment and i'm like, dude, we couldn't have done this in a place that wasn't her apartment? but well. why not welcome a strange man in there?

he's going on about the soviet union and the genetic anomalies from twins being studied and turned into clones, who will be used to sabotage the medical system. and all the clones- who are called gregors- are being systematically eliminated in exchange for the knowledge that created them.

pause. no i actually don't want to analyze the alleged soviet gregors who will somehow poison the medical system. i'm looking at scully's apartment. she must have moved back into DC after being reassigned from the academy. so is this the same apartment as her first one? i can't tell. this gregor stuff is complicated and i'm admiring the art on her walls- it looks like little watercolors or postcards of beach scenes. that's so sweet.

so it turns out that this ambrose chapel is the one that placed the ad they had called earlier, and he says the gregors are trying to reach mulder, and they need to work together to protect them, i guess. weird cross department alliance. i don't buy it.

scully is sitting on her couch looked confused as hell. me too girl i'm just trying to figure out if this is the same apartment from s1. sorry to the gregors.

we next see someone in a room full of green liquid that looks like those big tanks of lemonade at the mall. it appears to be a gregor. i imagine that this is NOT lemonade and is instead sustaining some sort of alien creature....

but now we're back with our agents and ambrose chapel visiting a new gregor in a hotel. when gregor opens the door, he is really scared of ambrose. and there's also another lady in the room with him who is hiding. things were going real rapid fire at this point. my notes were just a series of questions, or statements followed by question marks to express disbelief:

"gregor JUMPS OUT of the window but somehow GETS BACK UP? and now he's running away??? so we get a chase scene. WHO IS THIS AMBROSE FELLOW??? and why is there a lady in the room hiding behind a curtain???"

mulder is going after gregor on foot when he gets HIT BY A CAR????

but he says he's fine and tells scully to keep going. ambrose is stalking this gregor like a cat, and gregor has no choice but to climb something to escape.

but noooo!!! the shapeshifter is back!!! the shapeshifter WAS ambrose?? the gregors must be able to sense who the shapeshifter is.

"ambrose chapel" tells scully that the gregor got away, but she steps in some familiar green goo that indicates things are not looking great for our gregor, and he is likely gone. too soon.

"how are you feeling?", scully asks mulder. "like i should have taken the crosswalk", he says LMAOOOOOO

scully is pointing out the obvious: this ambrose fellow is sus as hell. "what happened to trust no one?" "oh, i changed it to trust everyone, i didn't tell you?" LMAOOOO this man cannot stop running his damn mouth

he's all, i ran a background check on ambrose, and he is totally clear, he's been working at the CIA for 17 years! and she asks so WHY, if he has been working here for 17 years, does he need OUR HELP? and also the gregor was CLEARLY running from him, and not us!

he accuses her of being paranoid which 1. kettle calling pot black and 2. rude as hell??? she is speaking total sense here

OHHHH THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING!!! and again she is NOT wrong.

"you'll pursue a case at the expense of everything, to the point of insanity, and expect me to follow you. there has to be somewhere to draw the line" and is she wrong??? she does not get paid enough to deal with all of this, and he's endangering them... and he seems to just assume that she will do anything he asks of her.........

"if the pursuit of this case seems like insanity to you, feel free to step away from it" he says, in a way that is very judgemental and accusatory and not at all understanding of how wild this whole thing sounds. and i'm taken back to his opening monologue, how he was going on about the pursuit of the truth interfering with his relationships... exhibit a!!

she points out that SOMEONE DIED and he deflects by saying "those are the risks you take! you either accept them or you don't"

(now, when signing up for the fbi, i do not actually think "murder by alien" was on the risk of disclaimers signed so.)

((ugh he's pissing me off here. i get it, the bloodhound need to sniff out the truth without regard for anything else, let alone something as simple as safety. but could we maybe LISTEN to our partner???? just once????? GRRRR))

(also they keep calling ambrose chapel by his last name and its making me think of chappell roan, my beloved above all else. this is not very h-o-t t-o g-o of mulder to be ignoring scully's concerns)

despite the high levels of tension and voices being raised, she pulls out her shoe that had stepped in the alien gunk and shows him how it has been burned through. his eyes light up in fascination and he says we need to go get this tested now and also can you prepare an autopsy bay? we can't figure out how the agent in the syracuse situation died. and then HER EYES expand with childlike wonder and everything is momentarily right with the world again.

he comes down to the autopsy- perhaps as a form of apology for his earlier rudeness- and watches while she goes over the stuff. and everything looks normal except his blood was clotted somehow??

"skinner's gonna wanna know why you didn't file your report... what are you gonna say?" "just the truth. i got hit by a car!" LMAOOOO okay honesty king

(it was at this point i lost power and had to spend the rest of the night wondering what the hell was going to happen next until i could finish it the next day.... i truly deserve compensation for this happening twice in one week. what sick and twisted force is out there trying to keep me from running this blog, huh?!?!?)

okay we're back. mulder is going into skinner's office.

he must have came up with a report real fast, because he goes to give it to skinner, and he says he didn't call him to talk about that:

"your father has been trying to reach you. there's been a family emergency"

(proving once again that skinner is serving the same functions as a high school prinicpal)

he calls his dad, and his mom picks up... and he asks why she was at "dad's place".... MULDER CHILD OF DIVORCE CONFIRMED?!?!?

scully stops by his office with an address she found to go on, and he says you go there, and walks out. she asks where he's going and he said "home" and did not elaborate. and said nothing else.

(this pissed me off because RIGHT before scully was kidnapped, he had similarly made an abrupt exit on here and i thought that he would stop doing that and start saying a proper goodbye but no. he has not learned. ALWAYS say goodbye and tell your friends you love them when you leave- it is NOT negotiable!!!!!!)

she drives to the address and it is... very creepy... it's the room full of tanks that aren't lemonade but they look like it!!!!! and ambrose chapel (NOT to be confused with chappell roan!) is pushing the tanks over and stepping on the chunks of stuff that comes out of them... very gross...

scully calls mulder and asks him to please call back because she thinks she is in danger, and someone is following her, sitting outside her apartment, BUT HE IS BUSY!!! WITH FAMILY EMERGENCY!!! which she does not KNOW ABOUT because he DID NOT TELL HER!!!!

he arrives at his dad's place and i am not shocked that man is either from or has spent a significant amount of time in massachusetts, specifically martha's vineyard. like yeah. this isn't shocking to me. it just makes sense.

(although if that were the case, he'd be MUCH more obnoxious about the patriots and the red sox, and before he mentioned going to dodger's stadium and having a shirt from the new york knicks.... so what's the truth?!)

his dad is on the porch and is being kinda weird- do BOTH our agents have a strained relationship with their fathers? and his dad shakes his hand and it's Weird. but he sees his mom is talking to someone inside.

SISTER REVEAL??? it was the girl who was inside the house when the agents and ambrose showed up to find the gregor! AND i think it's the same girl that gave them the map back in binghamton... but i could be wrong?

in the morning he gives his mom a kiss and tucks her into bed. aww.

then he walks outside and it looks like he is either gonna start hyperventilating or crying, but his "sister" is on the porch and he goes over to talk to her- what do you say after 22 years?

she says she was returned around age 8 or 9, and placed with a family, and that she couldn't remember anything until doing some hypnotherapy a few years back, and the memories of her family and all of the horrific testing returned.

(and sorry i'm not buying it. idk it just doesn't seem to add up!!!!!)

but he's hugging her so it's probably best he can't hear me say that. my guess is someone is trying to distract him from the truth.

but, she already knows what is going on... she says a bounty hunter is after her "father" (which confuses mulder because... same dad?) but she corrects herself and says the man who adopted her is one of the gregors- and he is an alien- and they'll be after her soon, i guess for maybe knowing the truth?

at this point in the episode we begin a series of phone calls in which both parties repeatedly miss each other's calls and i was like whyyyyy. whyyyyy.

anyway scully is leaving. she's in a jacket and she's taking the bus and i love her so bad. she says where she is going on the phone but i assumed she was lying because it was in public.

and mulder's "sister" is saying that the hit man can disguise himself as anyone. so he's trying to reach scully, who is back at the site of the lemonade-looking alien tanks.

she pulls a lock picker out of her fanny pack because that is my baby.

and when she goes in all the alien stuff is smashed. she's looking at the alien meat on the floor. and she picks something up and. OH FUCK, i yelled at my screen. i hit pause SO FAST. she was holding a PULSATING ALIEN EMBRYO. but some guy is in the back!!!!!

she tries to get him to stop whatever it is he's doing but he says "you cannot hurt us" and then all of the remaining gregors with the same face are in the room!!!!!!

so she puts them in maximum security but the windows on the cars weren't blacked out and i feel that they should have been. and just as i make note of this we see the shapeshifter hit man... NO!!!

scully ACTUALLY goes to the motel she said she would, and they miss calls 2 MORE TIMES... i will start biting!!!!!

and back where the gregors are being watched, the guards switch, and a new fellow walks in... and i guessed it was the shapeshifter, and yes indeed it was, he busts out his needle that turns the gregors to acid....

there's a knock at scully's door at like 11:30 at night and she goes and gets it and it's mulder!!! where were you, she asks, when her phone starts ringing...

and who is on the other end but... mulder.........

no.... shapeshifter......

TO BE CONTINUED?????

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

this is so unfair because had the power NOT been knocked off i could have seen this episode yesterday and then part 2 tonight. but now i shall be forced to wait until TOMORROW to see what happens. soooooo evil.

i should have known we were gonna get another two-parter when we were halfway through the episode and still no mention was made of any ice. you know, the ice we began with?

anyway. i really really liked this episode. the pacing was great, as much as i complained about their argument i thought it was excellent conflict, we learn more about mulder, but i do not believe that is really his sister. sorry. and if it IS her i'll be forced to issue a formal apology but until then i remain doubtful. has anyone considered doing a blood test. this predates 23 and me.

aughhh i need to know how he ends up an ice cube!!!!!! and i will have to wait until tomorrow. and while i technically COULD watch part 2 tonight i want to have a real good bit of time dedicated to breaking it down

(i saw the episode after the next one is about zoo animals and i was like hell yeah this is what i love about this show. we get some heartbreaking alien infiltration content and then some possessed elephants)

((WAIT. ARE THEY REALLY GONNA GET TO GO TO THE ZOO??? LIKE I'VE ALWAYS DREAMED OF?? but it's a zoo of ANGRY animals so it's not even going to be relaxing??? this is SOOOOO unfair...))

[honnelander]

crush

alright, this is such a niche and self-indulgent little piece of writing bc i freaking LOVE this (awful and huge asshole) character buuut i do like to write for whatever i love in the moment sooo here's a little Brad Wolfe aka Hunter X-5 fic (he's cute ok??) (and if you're into marvel and are not watching the loki series, PLEASE go watch it! it's so amazing!) credit to @mrsbawar21-blog for the still!

WARNINGS: none

word count: 2.8

pairing: Brad Wolfe (Hunter X-5) x reader

summary: Mobius could tell Brad knew you a lot better than he was letting on, and he wanted to get to the bottom of it.

masterlist

taglist: @antrenna @buggy0827 @laviiv @feelinmatcha @ivonarfsh @facelessfionna @deserticwren @shadydeanmuffin

"See? Isn't this nice, Brad?" Mobius asked his beige jumpsuit-claded prisoner as he sipped on his vanilla milkshake, happy as a clam. "I mean, literally ten minutes ago we were at each other's throats, yelling at one another, and here we are," Mobius gestured around with his hands, emphasizing the 1980s McDonald's they were currently sitting in, "sharing a meal like two adults."

"Yeah, and you also tortured me," Brad replied quickly, not missing a beat as he kept his gaze set on the pair of Lokis conversing in the parking lot through the window. He drummed his fingers on the plastic tabletop, bouncing his leg up and down as he quickly glanced at Mobius with a quirked eyebrow. "Forgot to mention that part, huh?"

"Yeah, and you called me a 'nobody'," Mobius rebutted quickly, a hint of irritation dripping from his voice. He stopped himself, shaking his head slightly with closed eyes as he exhaled curtly.

Now wasn't the time to dispute that and the silver-haired TVA analyst knew that arguing with X-5- or Brad, whoever, was a waste of everyone's time and he didn't feel like renewing their earlier verbal scrimmage here when there were more pressing matters at hand. Ultimately, Brad did bring them to Slyvie in the end so that must count for something, right?

"But, that doesn't matter. See, I even bought you a shake," Mobius said, reaching across the table to pick up Bradley's vanilla shake and put it closer to him. "A little peace offering."

Brad's eyes flitted to Mobius' obvious olive branch for a second before looking back up to the analyst, unimpressed. After a beat, he raised his right hand, jabbing an accusatory index finger at Mobius, as he cocked his head to the side, saying, "But you did slap me, right in the face. I'm not gonna forget that."

"Just take the shake, Brad," Mobius said swiftly, slightly exasperated as he suppressed the urge to roll his eyes and let out a frustrated sigh.

Now, Mobius M. Mobius prided himself on his seemingly never-ending well of patience, but even he felt himself start to get annoyed at Brad's unrelenting persistence on being as difficult as can be. Did he always try to be as annoying as possible or was this just how the ex-hunter always is naturally? It was exhausting.

The former minute man-turned-actor glanced down at the shake again, leaving it untouched before looking out the window to refocus on the Lokis outside. "What- what are they even doing out there?" he asked with a huff, gesturing a hand towards the pair of variants. "It's like they're going over every detail of their relationship or something."

"Yeah, well," Mobius relented with a small sigh, taking another sip of his shake. "There's a lot of baggage to unpack when you're basically in a relationship with yourself," he explained casually like he was talking about a bad day at the office.

Brad picked up on the slight disdain in his captor's tone but he didn't care enough to broach the topic any further. Instead, Brad sighed in slight disgust as he resumed drumming his fingers on the table saying, "God... it's weird."

Not wanting to harp on his partner's unorthodox romantic relationship any more than he had to, Mobius picked up a plastic fork, getting ready to dig into his pie. "Now, why don't you tell me a little bit more about your movie, huh?"

Brad rolled his eyes and scoffed at Mobius's obvious deflecting technique. "What about it?"

"Tell me about all about it." The analyst took a forkful of pie, asking with an encouraging smile, "Is it a horror flick?"

"Oh, come on, Mobius. You don't care."

"No, really! I'm serious," he said through a mouthful of pie. "The poster we saw looked scary."

Not being one to pass up discussing his work and real life that awaited him back on the sacred timeline, Brad took the bait. "It's not scary... it's elevated thriller," he explained in a slightly matter-of-fact tone, waving his hand around for emphasis. In a condescending tone, he added, "It's cinema, thank you very much."

Mobius had no clue if there really was a difference between a scary movie and an 'elevated thriller', since it all sounded the same to him, but he appreciated Brad's enthusiasm on the topic.

Lifting his milkshake up to his mouth to try and hide his amused smirk, Mobius relented, "Oh, my bad. You're right... 'elevated thriller', got it." He nodded as he took a sip, putting his cup back down when he was finished. "I'll have to check that out then."

"And you have to get your own ticket!" Brad continued. "I'm not hooking you up. Especially not after all of," he waved his hands around at their current setting, "this."

"Right, of course," Mobius agreed patiently, watching Brad with a small smile. "I'll get my own tickets."

After his small spiel, the ex-hunter let out a small sigh. He blinked, a look of recognition overcoming his face as he straightened up like he was remembering the situation he was currently in.

He turned his torso to face Mobius head-on, putting his arms on the table and motioning towards the TVA analyst's meal. "Look, why don't we get this all to go, huh? It- it packs right up. Why don't we just- get it to go, so we can get out of here," he said, emphasizing the second half of his sentence as he mimicked packing something up and motioned towards the exit.

"We can't do that," Mobius rejected quickly. "Not yet, anyway. I haven't finished eating and besides, y/n hasn't even gotten her food yet," he added, jabbing a thumb over at you, who was loitering by the cashier in the front, hands on your hips as you looked up at the menu.

Brad followed Mobius' thumb, huffing out another irritated sigh at your figure and rolling his eyes. "She's still ordering? We don't have time for this- God," he muttered under his breath and slumped in his chair, rubbing his jaw. "She always takes forever to do anything," he added with a mumble.

However, Brad's little admission right there didn't escape Mobius' keen ears. Trying to keep casual, he dug back into his pie. "'Takes forever to do anything', huh?" he asked nonchalantly. "It kinda sounds like you know a lot about y/n."

Brad's eyes flashed to Mobius's briefly before looking elsewhere, shifting in his plastic seat. "Yeah, well, she's your partner, isn't she?" He glanced out at Loki for a second, "Or, at least one of them? You should know how slow she can be sometimes."

The silver-haired analyst shook his head once. "She's not slow. I prefer the term meticulous, actually."

For whatever reason, Brad felt the need to clarify himself, which Mobius couldn't help but find interesting since he knew X-5 to be a guy who always brazenly said what was on his mind no matter the circumstances.

"I didn't mean slow as in stupid," Brad quickly clarified. "I-I meant as in she just takes a long time to do anything."

"Uh-huh," Mobius replied simply, secretly enjoying how bent out of shape the man in front of him was getting. "Right."

"Yeah..." Bradley trailed off, finally picking up his forgotten shake and taking a long sip of it, avoiding Mobius's expectant gaze. After a few beats of silence, he put his shake back on the table, looking over at Mobius with an annoyed glance. "What?"

"Nothing," Mobius replied easily, looking over at Brad once again before looking back at his food, munching on a fry. "I just think it's interesting how you know how 'slow' y/n can be sometimes, that's all."

"Look," he looked back at Mobius, a hint of irritation (and embarrassment?) in his features. "Whatever little 'thing' you're trying to imply here between me and her, just drop it."

Mobius perked up, looking back at his prisoner. There it was again, Brad's peculiar choice of words. "'Drop it'? Don't you mean 'give it up'? Since 'giving up' would imply that there's absolutely nothing there, whereas 'dropping it' would mean that something is there but you just don't want to talk about it?"

Brad sat up. "Drop it, give it up- whatever Mobius, just stop talking about it."

A smile started to creep up on Mobius's face, finding joy in all of this. This little impromptu interrogation was turning out to be a lot more fun than the last one he had with the actor. "'It'? So there's an 'it' now? What's 'it'? Do you mean your little crush on y/n?"

The actor's body stiffened for a nanosecond before turning to fully face the analyst. "Mobius, I swear to God-"

"OH! So that's a 'yes'!" Mobius declared, hitting the tabletop playfully with a grin, his smile only getting wider at seeing Brad become more and more agitated. "You do have a crush on y/n! Aw, that's so adorable Bradley, really."

The ex-hunter leaned back in his chair, scrunching up his face as he looked to away. "'A crush'? Really, Mobius? What are we- five? Please."

"Oh, so you love her?"

Brad's eyes widened, snapping back to look at him. "What? No, I don't-"

"Oh, that's ok," Mobius reassured with a wave. "Maybe your crush on her will blossom into love one day, who knows? I mean, life is crazy right?" He got another forkful of pie as he said, "I just can't believe that you had a crush on my partner this whole time and I didn't even notice. What kind of analyst am I?"

Mobius shook his head, laughing at his own joke. It seemed so obvious to him now. He should've realized that X-5 had some type of feelings for his long-time work partner eons ago. He always thought it was strange how X-5 would randomly stop to chat with them, well, with you mostly he now realized, at seemingly random times throughout the day, like when you both were having lunch in the cafeteria or how X-5 would always be the minute man to volunteer and be the muscle for one of your missions if need be. He had always thought it was weird and strange, but now it just made sense.

"Mobius," Brad said, letting out a defeated sigh. "Can you just, drop it? Please?"

Mobius looked back up, eyebrows raised as he looked up at the former minute man. "And now you're saying 'please'? Wow, you're just full of surprises today Bradley, aren't you?" he asked with a disbelieving laugh. He watched as Brad slunk back into his seat, a resigned look on his face. Ever the kind soul, Mobius kinda felt kinda bad for him. "Hey, look," Mobius started, in a softer tone, "X-5, Brad, Bradley, whatever you want to be called, your secret is safe with me, alright? I won't tell her, I promise."

The movie star was quiet for a moment, sucking on his teeth. Even though he personally might not like Mobius, he did know that Mobius was a man of his word and kept his promises so, he had no choice but to trust him. "Yeah, well... thanks," he said, flashing the analyst with a quick look of gratitude as he rapt his knuckle on the table.

"Hey, no problem," Mobius said, regarding the man across from him for another moment before finishing up his pie. With a small, surprised laugh, Mobius said, "You know, I just think it's funny how a," jerk, he thought to himself, "guy like you ends up with a little, school-yard crush on such a kind and caring person like y/n."

Brad raised an eyebrow at Mobius's choice of words. "'A guy like me'? Liking someone like her? What is that supposed to mean Mobius?"

"Oh, nothing," he replied innocently. "I just think it's funny. I guess, in this case, opposites really do attract, huh?"

"Oh, what? Now you're calling me a jerk?" Brad started, ready to go at it with Mobius again. "Why don't you just-"

"Hey, guys," you said, finally arriving at the table with a brown to-go paper bag with your food, sliding into the seat next to Mobius, your partner, unknowingly stopping the argument that was about to take place. "Sorry I took so long. There were just so many options to choose from, you know? It was hard to decide."

Now that Mobius was keen on Brad's little crush on you, he couldn't help but want to mess with him even further. "Ah that's ok y/n, I know that sometimes those things can be a little slow," he said, the corner of his mouth twitching upwards when Brad sent him a glare. "So don't worry about it."

"No word from Loki yet?" you asked, completely oblivious to the invisible sparing match occurring between the two men. "They're still out there?" you asked as you leaned on the table, craning your neck to try and see the two variants better.

"No, nothing yet. Hey, y/n," Mobius said suddenly, hitting your shoulder slightly like he had just come up with a great idea. "Why don't you move and sit next to Brad? I think he has a better vantage point to see them than I do," he innocently suggested, sending Brad a good-natured wink.

Brad nearly face-palmed himself. He forgot that Mobius could sometimes be as subtle as a baseball bat. "Mobius," he warned lowly.

But the mentioned analyst continued unphased. "And while you're sitting over there, watching the Lokis, you know, next to Brad," he added again for emphasis, "you can eat your meal."

"Oh, no need," you answered easily, to which question, the guys didn't know. "I got my food to go."

"See?" Brad quickly straightened, a newfound urgency in his tone and movements are he looked back and forth between you and Mobius. "She's smart, she got her food to go, to have back at the TVA. Which is exactly where we all need to be. Right now. Let's go."

"Jeez, Brad, what is it with you?" He asked exasperatedly, rolling his eyes. "You're like a broken record. First, you're all like, 'get me back to the sacred timeline' and now you're all like, 'get me out of here'." He shook his head. "It's like you-"

"Know something," you said, cutting off Mobius' train of thought, your eyes looking at your beige jumpsuited prisoner with a calculating gaze.

At your words, Mobius stopped his spiel, blinking as he leaned back in his seat, his eyes looking over at Brad in thought. "Do you know something?" he asked.

Brad, however, stayed quiet. He picked up his milkshake, swirling it around before taking a couple of sips as he turned his body away from you both, looking out the window.

"Hey," Mobius said a little more firmly, slapping the actor's forearm to get his attention. "Don't get all quiet on me now, Zaniac. What do you know? Is this a setup?"

"It's an ambush," you said.

But Brad continued to suck on the straw, not looking at either of you.

"Bradley, answer me," Mobius said forcefully.

Brad put his milkshake down, swallowing the sweet treat before looking at you. "We need to get out of here," was all he said.

You held eye contact with him, discerning the urgency and panic you saw held within his gaze. You couldn't help but feel that when Brad had said 'we', he really only meant you and him. His look and words sent a shiver down your spine.

Mobius was the first to get up, the rest of his meal forgotten. "Alright, let's go. We need to regroup with Loki so our friend Brad here can tell us what's really going on." He picked up his tray, walking over to the trash to dump the rest of his fast food scraps away, and put his tray on top of the can.

Brad held your stare for another moment before finally blinking, breaking the spell, as he hastily got up himself. "Finally," he muttered. He tossed his drink away as he quickly followed behind Mobius.

But you didn't move. You stared at the now empty spot that X-5 had occupied seconds ago, trying to discern why you felt that he knew about a lot more than just this current situation.

As always, your long-time partner and best friend knew when you needed to be broken out of your train of thought and get you back on track. "Y/n!" Mobius called out as he headed towards the exit. "Let's go!"

Snapping back to reality, you blinked, shaking off your wandering thoughts and stood up, following Mobius and Brad outside. Now wasn't the time to analyze Brad's actions and choice of words, right now all you needed to know was what Brad knew right at this moment and why he was so adamant about getting back to the TVA.

If you wanted to question Brad more, you could do that later. He was your prisoner after all and time worked differently in the TVA, right?