#and very pasty lmao

[cawnecny]

Oliver Bonk speaks at 2023 Development Camp

07.02.2023

[a2zillustration]

This game is not subtle.

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[catwif3]

went to pride with the gang yesterday! we had a real good time, most of us got sunburnt, i got a TON of compliments and questions on my outfit, as Does Happen when your outfit is "Tits Out and Also Thighs Out Actually How Are You Wearing That Much Clothes While Also Not Wearing Clothes At All"

[1-ufo]

Me pretending to be an influencer #pooltime #oopsigavethosetoyouforfree

[senselessalchemist]

Been so busy with work I forgot to be depressed about holidays. Luckily I fixed that by getting off work early today

This helped tho

[f14fun]

pixelated love (!simmer x mv1) - chapter 3

synopsis: in which the famous three time world champion max verstappen wants to learn how to play the sims 4. except, he doesn't really know how to. so what does he do, search up a youtube tutorial. low-and-behold, y/n's video is the first he watches.

smau ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆ prev | next | series index ˚୨୧⋆｡

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 127,821 others

yourusername: incase you haven't heard, max and i are getting married! planning my pinterest board wedding with @/maxverstappen1 as we speak!

view comments:

user1: what.

user1: mother you are getting married to that PASTY AND GNARLY EUROPEAN WHITE MAN??? 😡😡😡

user1: is this a joke

user1: this MUST be an insane practical joke that she pulled off

user1: think of your CHILDREN (me) as you make this decision

user1: until then, i uninvite myself from the wedding ❌👰🏻‍♀️👰🏻‍♂️

user1: sincerely, your favorite child

user1: (for all of you overtly sensitive fat fucks that was entirely satire 🤡🤡🤡)

user2: everyone who doesn't have twitter right now must be hella confused 🤣🤣

redbullracing: ???

yourusername: please avert your gaze to this message and the entirety of my account as a whole, deepest apologies for any confusion or misunderstandings 🤡

yourusername: @/maxverstappen1 fifth slide. my head between those juicy thighs. five o'clock tonight.

yourusername: need my head in between that meat like a stick on costco rotisserie chicken 🐔🍗😋🤤💦🫠

maxverstappen1: I am in shock.

maxverstappen1: I do not even know how to respond to this comment

maxverstappen1: Also what is a "costco"

yourusername: oh shit, i forget that you're not an american LMAO 🍟🍔🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🤠🤠🤠🏈🗽

yourusername: it's just a huge wholesale groccery store

maxverstappen1: Oh okay, I see

yourusername: was that a redeemable statement!!!

maxverstappen1: Not one bit. ❌

maxverstappen1: Also it is spelled as *grocery instead of whatever mess you spelled

yourusername: i hate you

maxverstappen1: You cannot hate your husband, I am very likeable

yourusername: AHA YOU JUST ADMITTED IT

yourusername: I GOTCHA NOW BUDDY

user3: top ten wedding (???) announcements ever made, ladies and gentlemen

user4: Y/N I APPLAUD YOU, YOU HAVE OFFICIALLY EXCEEDED MY EXPECTATIONS ON HOW WILD YOU CAN GET. GO AMERICA RAHHH 🦅🦅🦅

yourusername: proud to do our country a cuntry 💅🏻🦅🏈

maxverstappen1: Wait if I marry you does that mean I also have American citizenship?

user5: MAX WHATTTTTT LMAOOO???

user6: did NOT expect max to type that lmao, free him y/n 🤠

user7: the #maxisaynhostage agenda never ends 🤣🤣

yourusername: what-

landonorris: Mate, what are you on about...

landonorris: Also congratulations to the happy couple! @/yourusername @/maxverstappen1

yourusername: awww, thank you so much lando!! max, you better make him the best groomsman or ELSE

maxverstappen: @/yourusername @/landonorris 😐😐😐

charles_leclerc: Congrats you two! 🍾🥂 Alex and I would love to be invited to your wedding!

yourusername: Saving a seat for you two (plus leo!)

maxverstappen1: There is no wedding. ❌👰🏻‍♀️👰🏻‍♂️

oliverbearman: the oli bearman erasure from the leclerc family is unforunately so real 😞

yourusername: OLI I WOULD NEVERRRR FORGET YOUU

oliverbearman: please adopt me 🥹🥹🥹

yourusername: of course 🥹🥹🥹

charles_leclerc: ???? @/maxverstappen1 .... Do you approve of this mate?? Your first child is my child?...

maxverstappen1: OF COURSE NOT PLEASE UNADOPT HIM @/yourusername

yourusername: this is your first born. no. ❌

oliverbearman: ❌❌❌

user8: the way she makes max more unhinged LMAO u can see it in his typing

oscarpiastri: Okay. The Oscar Piastri-Leclerc erasure saga never ends.

oscarpiastri: Hello??

oscarpiastri: Hello guys?

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taglist: @hiireadstuff @sinofwriting @mehrmonga @the-untamed-soul @glai1023-blog @loloekie @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @sheastri @llando4norris @gwginnyweasley @carmenita122 @ririyulife @pausmoon @ur-fave-ave @eveninggstar @maddie-naps @erin-odonnell04 @rexit-mo @ems-alexandra @si1ver06 @iamred-iamyellow @bibissparkles

some of these didn't get tagged, and i'm having trouble (?) it's being very weird, idk, so please let me know if your name is here and it didn't tag you ❣️

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author's note: ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾 LMAO I LIED part three came out faster than expected. but part four may take a while as i'm a tad busy these next four weeks 🫠

comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

[cy-cyborg]

Tips for writing and drawing amputee characters: Stump Scarring

This was something I had originally intended to mention in this post but felt it deserved its own separate post.

A lot of people, when drawing and designing amputee characters, draw their characters with these big, gnarly looking scars all over the stump. I get why people do this, but in reality, most amputees have stumps that look more like this:

The only scarring that is inherent to amputation (meaning most amputees have) is a very thin line right at the tip of the stump that comes from where the stump was sewn shut. After 5-10 years though, these thin incision scars will fade to be nearly invisible in most folks other than the indent it usually leaves in the skin.

Of course, there are exceptions! My own legs are covered in heavy scarring like the pictures below.

but typically, you only see this in amputees who lost their limb in ways that required them to also need skin grafts, such as from a burn (fire or acid), gangrene, some types of rapid-onset sepsis, or particularly brutal animal attacks.

For context, I used scars from meningococcal as reference here.

I think this is another reason a lot of people, particularly in 2D comics and animation, cover their amputee character's stumps, because they think all amputees have scars like the ones in the second image and I'll be honest, that's a lot to draw when you're drawing it over and over again, but unless your amputee also needed skin grafts bcuase of their injury/illness, their stumps will look more like the first images.

Fun fact: on particularly pale skin, scars can change colour depending on temperature. scars have less circulation and the blood vessels are closer to the skin, which means if you don't have a lot of melanin, your scars can turn a grey-ish purple colour like so:

This information is brought to you by an especially pasty white person in the southern hemisphere (where it's winter atm) who's scars haven't seen the sun since june lmao.

A quick final note: If you look up "burn scars" or any other similar type of large scarring on google a lot of what you get are fresh scars, so they're going to look different than the ones here. On pale skin, large scars like the ones above start out very dark red and will fade to look more like the images here. The same is true for dark skin, typically fresh scars will be much darker in colouration and will fade to be closer to the natural skin tone with time, though on both, they will always be very visible. Some types of scarring on darker skin tones can cause the skin to become lighter, but they don't usually turn entirely light pink like I've seen some folks draw. This is why it's so important to look up references of the type of scar your character has AND how that looks on their skin tone.

And as always, listen to POC and seek out the recourses specifically made by them, especially if you're drawing characters with darker skin tones. Their lived experience will always beat my "what I found through internet research and from talking to friends"

[onboardsorasora]

Another 'idk what this is' post lmao. But my attempt at girl!Dan

Daniel entered the event, ducking her head a little to let her curls— that were more defined and perfect looking— cover her face a little. She was a little uncomfortable, but Blake and the stylist from their new main sponsor said she looked good.

This wasn’t the sort of outfit she normally went for, the flared pants were different to her usual (ripped) skinny jeans, but they cupped her ass and thighs in a very flattering way. The top was definitely nothing she had in her closet, it was slinky and metallic and exposed her entire back— which was a work of art thanks to her years of work and effort.

Christian, the man of the hour, was the first to see her and his eyes widened in surprise was enough to tell her that this deviation from her usual outfits was ‘radical’ indeed.

“Daniel. Wow.” Daniel smiled in embarrassment. She didn't surprise Christian often, in fact she last time she surprised him was in 2014 when she beat Seb. And maybe in 2018 when she signed for Renault. But that was different.

“Happy Birthday Boss!” Daniel grinned, clinging to Geri when she came over to hug her as well. Geri’s hand on her bare back felt odd but not as weird as she anticipated.

“Is this Hugo?” Geri asked, figuring the tiny eyelets that made up her top. Daniel nodded, she was head to toe in the former Alpha Tauri’s new sponsor. All her jewelry to her shoes. Even her underwear– including the nipple pasties.

“Yeah, Kelly the stylist came prepared.” Daniel joked. She knew Yuki was wandering around somewhere, he'd been marginally easier to dress and Daniel had many moments tonight where she wished she hadn't grown out her hair.

“Have you seen Max?” Christian asked, his voice was odd, maybe.

“No, I just walked in actually. Haven't even had a drink yet.”

“Of course, of course.” Christian nodded before encouraging her to chat with the executives around, all the important people invited to Christian’s 50th in Vegas. The race was in a few days, Daniel hoped she could stay the minimum amount of time and go.

She'd spent a little time talking to some new Alpha Tauri– Hugo Boss executives before she wandered to the bar. She leaned forward on her elbows, swiping her loose curls over one shoulder.

“hi, can I get you a drink?” A familiar voice sounded from her right and Daniel tucked her head on her palm and smiled over at her friend and former teammate.

“It's an open bar mate. Does that actually work on women?” She grinned at Max who took a moment to piece her voice with the person he was looking at. If she thought Christian’s surprise was impressive, Max's was almost a religious experience.

“Daniel? Wow– I didn't recognize you.” Max gushed, eyes wide. He was blushing, and Daniel fought hers to continue to tease him.

“So about this open bar, I'd love a tequila.” Daniel grinned at him, she could feel the gloss on her lips when she smiled widely. She hoped her eyes weren't completely hidden by her new lashes.

Max looked... Well she'd never seen him look [at her] like this before. He kept looking her up and down; like he was seeing her for the first time, like he didn't recognize her.

A bartender came over at Max's wave as if they knew that he specifically wasn't to be left waiting. Daniel wondered if her own picture was taped up at the back of the bar but they didn't recognize her with her new look. It didn't matter because Max ordered exactly what she wanted, down to the brand of tequila she preferred and how she liked her glass prepared. She didn't realize he paid this close attention.

Max handed her the drink, his fingers lingering on hers for a beat longer than normal. Daniel smiled at him in thanks, determined not to think too deep into it. It was Max– nothing was happening.

Max smiled his crinkley eyed smile at her as if she'd said something funny– she hadn't. Then led her away from the bar with a hand to the small of her back.

It felt…different than when Geri did it. Geri's fingers mainly did the touching, Max's palm was pressed into her skin, branding her like a tattoo. It's apt because her back was the only place she hadn't yet covered in ink.

Max was talking to her, but she couldn't concentrate on what he was saying. Hyper aware of his skin against hers. It wasn't like it was the first time he's led her around with a proprietary hand, in fact it was pretty normal. But she'd never… she'd never noticed it until now. Not until it was skin against skin. It was harder to hide when there were no clothes to hide behind.

“Daniel, are you paying attention?” Max's voice broke her thoughts and she sipped her drink for something to do.

“Sorry Maxy, got a bit distracted there.” She bit her lip, letting it go quickly at the taste of lipgloss. She truly wasn't used to it. She looked at Max through her new lashes– his gaze was on her lips.

“I, of course, understand.” He murmured, it sounded as if he didn't even realize he was talking. “Daniel I–”

“Ricciardo Daniel, as I live and breathe. Is that you?” George interrupted and Daniel had never before now wished George could disappear so she could hear what Max had been going to say. He had shaken his head as if to clear his thoughts and taken a sip of his gin tonic.

Daniel smiled at George, wildly wondering if she imagined the twitch of Max's hand on her back.

“Russel George! it is I, I am me!” She chuckled and glanced over at Max to see he'd adopted his resting ‘go away’ face. Daniel was starting to feel lightheaded.

Part 2

[theladyofshalott1989]

Quidditch Champions: Into the Quaffleverse

Welp, I guess this is happening. LMAO.

Summary:

There's been a Time Accident. What does that mean, exactly? Well, as it turns out, no one seems to know. To make matters worse, it involves Quidditch, with random players from various times suddenly spawning to play. But wait, there's more! There are only so many matches. And, naturally, if you lose, you might, well, possibly die. Hard to say for sure.

Sebastian Sallow, Ominis Gaunt, Remus Lupin, Hermione Granger, and more are about to have one hell of a day. Who will make it out alive... if, in fact, their lives are truly on the line?

The first line: “If Sebastian Sallow had known he could very well die today, he would have eaten more Pumpkin Pasties at dinner last night.”

[jadeoru]

YESSS WE NEED A SMUDGED LIPSTICK YN STYLE GUIDE

OKAYOKAY HERE IT IS!!!

YN STYLE GUIDE! ☆

SHIRTS:

☆ shirts like these are a staple in her wardrobe! she loves to wear them for concerts, but sometimes she'll wear them casually to get like groceries or something just for fun! loves thrifting and literally almost cries every time she finds a shirt like these and it doesn't fit her. most of the time she just cuts/alters it to make it fit though! diy queen!

☆ big fan of tank tops! she likes to show off her biceps tbh. usually paired with a short skirt or short shorts!

☆ no matter what the occasion is she will more than likely show up with an inappropriate graphic shirt. its like her trademark. LOVES to wear ones like the first image because 1: she likes to spread her thoughts and opinions/very openly shits on the government/politics in general, and 2: she likes to piss people off. she has a very punk mindset and is very anti-establishment; she usually prints the graphic on plain shirts and makes them herself. ☆ usually wears them insanely oversized, paired with shorts, and usually wears brightly coloured/patterned tights. ultimately she loves causing chaos and is very opinionated!

☆ sometimes she doesnt even bother wearing a shirt and wears nipple pasties. she wears them because she likes it, but people assume its a political thing and it usually causes a stir. she doesnt give a fuck. firm believer of letting her boobs breathe!! very inspired by victoria de angelis.

☆ obsessed with leather! always gets them vintage because she prefers the more worn in/old look they have! LOVES to customise them with pins and patches too. she will wear them no matter how hot the weather is.

PANTS/SKIRTS:

☆ as i said earlier, she LOVES leather. it makes her feel so cunty and gives her a major confidence boost. doesn't normally wear pants like these outside of concerts, almost only rocks these onstage. they almost always end up ripping at the end of a gig , in her defense she loves dancing.

☆ firm believer that there's no such thing a skirt thats too short! will alter skirts and make them shorter. she loves upcycling clothes + most of her wardrobe is clothes that she's customised/altered herself by sewing or stitching random things onto them, cutting them, dying them, etc. loves grabbing a handful of random materials and adding them to a skirt. loves it when clothes are chaotic so she adds as much as possible to them. will only wear simple skirts when everything else in her outfit is too complicated.

☆ loves plaid. everything plaid. will find a way to add plaid to almost all of her clothes. wants her coffin to be plaid when she dies.

☆ tripp pants make up like 50% of her wardrobe. wears them when she's going out shopping or something as like a casual fit. never really wears them onstage. pretty much the same with her crust pants! except she actually wears them for concerts

SHOES:

☆ almost only wears platform shoes. she loves being taller than men and intimidating them. usually wears boots, but she loves a good chunky sneaker every now and then.

im probably gonna make a part two with accessories and stuff lmao be prepared

[risetherivermoon]

Some s1 kids/kiddads art of an au im working my mind out on! basically a typical fantasy/faerun type au but my own little twist on it :))

heres some info cards about them in this specific universe as well as some rambling:

im also probably gonna make one of these for the dads as well because this au has become some brainrot lol, i had a lot of fun designing lark and sparrows outfits because i always imagine oakvale wear being white gold and green so i kinda really leaned into with that. Nick as a tiefling is fun and silly to me teehee, as well as terry jr as a vampire. Its just a bunch of magical people and then grant lmao

i like terry and ron having a found family type of bond, and i promise ron will end up meeting samantha at some point lol, and i have a lot of notes about ron's character because of his background and everything, they aren't all supposed to fit into specific dnd archetypes or classes, but some of them like sparrow, nick, and terry have actual dnd classes lol, im really just fucking around with the loose concept of faerun, tbh i kinda see nick as both a bard and a fighter type of character? yk?

the necklaces with the single green bead that both lark and sparrow wear actually hold some cultural meaning for oakvale that im still working on, but i came up with the concept a while back so we'll see if i decide to talk about it

their stories do end up intertwining but this is the basic background info about their stories, and there will be more revealed when i get into making the s1 dads info cards as well.

terry and the twins probably took the longest to color and draw because of how many details are on both of them, especially terry's parasol bc i drew that without looking up a reference so i do hope it actually looks like an umbrella...nick was a bit hard to draw just because his face is partially covered and grant was actually fairly easy and i love how his design came out since ive been attempting to figure out a s1/teen design for him for a bit, obviously this isn't it because he's in fantasy attire but it's close enough that i have the gist of the idea..i made him look so pale lol, i imagine carol is pretty pasty and darryl isn't too tan either so...white boy is very white indeed

anywayys thats some of my funky lil au lol

(here are the dads!)

[miasmaghoul]

Okay, okay, hear me out. You've done dick sizes, now what about boobies? I mean, you can "milk" dicks, but what about actual mommy milkers? We need some more ghoulette representation.

heheh boobies heheheheheh

Cumulus: My girl got HONKERS. Total BADONKERS. Seriously, Lulu is STACKED and she knows it. She's a tiny bit self conscious of the way they sag and how her nipples (pretty pink, with wide areolas) point towards the floor, but the others make sure she knows how gorgeous they are anyway. She loves having them squeezed, sucked and fucked in every possible way.

Cirrus: Solid handfuls, but not too big to be uncomfortable. Lovely teardrop shaped mounds that sit so nicely on her chest. Very sensitive nipples, one of her very few weaknesses. The wrinkle up at the slightest touch. She owns the fanciest bras of the ghoulettes because she knows how good she looks in lace.

Sunshine: Smaller than Cirrus and slightly mismatched in size (the left one is bigger). She sunbathes naked, so they're the same lovely caramel color as the rest of her. Dusky nipples threaded with gold rings that look like sunbursts. Never wears a bra, and her nips always poke out through her shirts. Also my Sunny is trans and does not shave, so she has a cute little smattering of rust-colored curls between them.

Aurora: The definition of perky. Smaller, but just the right size to bounce when she rides. Her cute little nipples are most always stiff, so much so that she chooses to wear pasties under her preferred sports bras. Anything else feels too restrictive. She's so, so sensitive there too. And ticklish - no one tell Swiss.

Mist: Basically flat chested. Mosquito bites at best. She has no problem with it, thinks it would be a hassle if they were any bigger. She has a large back tattoo of a serpent, one that winds over her shoulder so its head sits just above her right breast. Also has pierced nipples, but prefers silver barbells. Not very sensitive, and doesn't particularly like having them touched despite liking to show them off.

(honorary shoutout to the ifritties, switties and quintitties, but they all get enough attention lmao)

[pwnyta]

From someone who knows basically nothing about Baldurs Gate......

Imma give my UNSOLICITED OPINIONS.

Karlach is the most consistent with her style. She looks great in everything. Shes also the hottest overall (no pun intended). Her personality is one of the cutest and the fact she doesnt seem to get that good of an ending is UH... CRIMINAL.

Best ship- ...//covers face and mumbles... I really like her relationship with the player... this is so unfortunate... but its so cute. I love her. (I know theres a couple endings where you can kill her. Those dont exist or Im calling the cops.)

Base model MEH, Camp model VERY cute, Panties.... ITS A CHOICE BUT ONE I BUY THAT HE'D MAKE FROM WHAT I KNOW ABOUT HIM. Also I dont believe for a MINUTE this man got a six pack why are you lying directly to my face... He reminds me of Dr Frank, I love his voice, I would never be able to deny him anything because hes really funny and I just wanna see him go crazy.

Best ship- Astarion/Wyll... I just saw a video of Star being SO into Wyll it was hilarious. 'Honestly that MAN~' Someone get him a Thirst-aid kit.

The sheer driplessness of this man needs to be studied by SCIENTISTS. But his panties are pretty cute. I do like his face/hair... but the man cant dress himself. ...Look on paper Gale is everything. His sweetness and earnestness is very charming but GOD... hes so cringe sometimes. GOOFY FUCK.

Best ship- ... Probably Wyll? I mean you can just slot Wyll in anywhere cuz hes so charming and he and Gale are such cornballs itd be insufferable.

Laezel takes second place right behind my bbg Karlach. Her base model is a little weird looking the metal looks weird but it still looks pretty cool. Her camp model is super hot, I never would have expected those panties TBH... why dont the men get fun panties. This is a crime. Anyways 9/10 Zel! Congrats. IDK if I like her or the memes with her. her VA did that ducks in a row video and its so funny and I cant ever be mad at her no matter what she wanted to do.

Best ship- .....I mean aesthetically Karlach? For shallow reasons... idk what their relationship is like.

...Look I know shes super popular but.... Look her camp model is pretty great but Her hair is hideous. I can get over Gales absolute driplessness cus hes still handsome... what is this hair... GIRL. The panties are a choice too... but after Karlach and Zel she really had little chance. Least theyre better than the guys.

Best ship- //shrugs I have no attachment to this woman LMAO

Base model? Kinda boring but not terrible. Camp model? One of the best... the cute little peekaboo belly. I hope someone bites him. BUT THE PANTIES??? Girl. Youre lucky youre so handsome. The horns and crazy eyes elevate him... just putting that out there. Like Gale... on paper Wyll is so perfect but HES SO EMBARRASSINGLY EARNEST. The problem is probably just the style of the game... if it was less uncanny realism and more stylized maybe I wouldnt be as cringed out LMAO. Youre so damn cute Wyll... Im sorry.

Best ship- Astarion is funny but hes such a menace... I think Wyll deserves better. HALSIN/Wyll.

Halsin somehow does the earnest lover thing way better than Gale or Wyll... but hes almost as bad as Gale when it comes to dressing himself. Who let this man dress himself? Hes hot though. It makes up for it. I cant believe BG3 let this beefy elf exist... Im so used to young looking scrawny pasty elves (eyes emoji).

Best ship- Like Wyll you can just put him anywhere.... but WYLL. Theyd just be so cute. Halsin could definitely dull the sheer earnestness to tolerable levels probably.

This lady I know almost nothing about except shes kinda rancid.... but at least shes kinda hot and also can dress decently.

Best ship- ...//shrugs

The fact shes not romanceable makes BG unplayable. Her face and hair is gorgeous, her clothes get a MEH from me... maybe if the colors were more muted?

Best ship- ...//shrugs

Hes fine.

Best ship- ...//shrugs

?

I know the Emperor has some part in this too... and hes hot. So...

Overall-

The difference between S tier and A tier.. isnt that different. I really like those 3 freaks.

At first Wyll & Halsin were these too but... they grew on me & I cant blame them for their faults. Its not Halsins fault you can traumatize a squirrel... its not Wylls fault the realistic style combined with his cheesy romantic bullshit embarrasses me...

I couldnt even get through Dream Daddys.... and I love that game.

I can forgive Wyll.

[misslydian]

Can we not praise Toei for "giving Usopp his melanin back"? Be cause they didn't lmao. (It seems like that perhaps the initial very pasty Usopp we saw in the new op was a mistake and like, abnormally pale. But what it was changed to is definitely not a poc skin tone, it just looks like what he's been for the whole post-timeskip.)

Let's only praise Toei when they make significant, actual changes to characters' skin colors, yeah?

[solradguy]

You should make a throughly platonic translation of LtA and whenever the author uses a very flowery description for Ky, just add like a mile long footnote explaining that you just feel very blasé about Ky.

"Ky Kiske scowled picturesquely^1 as he sat in silent contemplation”

LMAO ok hold on lemme write what I translated last night in a totally bland tone wrt to Ky

--

Blue, yellow, red, green, and purple.

Five colors of light flowed around the small room. The appearance of the room itself was simple, and the soft light—the only light—that filtered through the luminous stained glass windows made it clear that it was part of a church.

Bathed in the multicolored light, documents were lightly turned by skinny fingers. At the end of these fingers was an elbow covered by some fancy white outfit, which revealed his pasty bare shoulder and neck.

The figure's adequately moisturized skin and thin body were like a kind of sculpture or carving someone put a lot of effort into. If one had to guess what this guy did for a living based on how he looked then, yeah, a dancer would probably fit. His conventionally attractive face and brushed yellow hair above his shoulders supported this assumption, but he was having a bad day that day.

Rich dudes in paintings, you know? Their eyes always give them away.

This bastard's killed people.

[queer-irritator]

A New Neighbor | Kratos x GN! Reader | Chapter 9

Content Warnings: Brief nudity, illness, adult language

Word Count: 1,088

Chapter 8, Chapter 10

A/N: I finally thought of a title!!!! idk why it took me an ungodly amount of time to come up with something so obvious/mediocre lmao

I also wanted to add a disclaimer that the descriptions of illness in this chapter are not meant to be realistic. It involves my very minimal knowledge of this illness and its effects. 

---------------------------

You took a deep breath, preparing yourself to exit the warm water and enter the frigid air. You grabbed your soap and quickly exited the hot spring, wrapping a towel, that Rana had fetched, around your body.

Your teeth began to chatter as you quickly dried your body. You hadn’t notice Kratos had also exited the water and was drying his body, but with not as much haste as you. You turned to grab your clothes and got a full view of pasty-white ass. Kratos had his back turned to you and was drying his torso off. You took just a moment to admire his butt before you got dressed. Damn, all that climbing had done him wonders. 

You whistled for Rana to come warm you up. Rana trotted up to you and started to circle you to warm you up. You gave her back rubs to praise her, and to simultaneously warm up your hands. You glanced back towards Kratos, who had now had his lower half clothed and was putting on his chest armor. He didn’t seem bothered by the cold one bit. Your wet hair had started to freeze as Kratos finally turned around, picked up the basket, and headed to you.

“How the hel are you not freezing??” You asked, your lips beginning to show a tint of blue.

You regretted bathing out here. The sun had almost set and the temperature had dropped substantially.

“I have become used to it.” He stated.

“I thought Greece was warm…” Your entire body began shaking, and it was becoming painful to breathe. 

Kratos was starting to become concerned for you, “We should go back.”

“Yeah.” You agreed, slightly out of breath.

You took a few steps forward, keeping a hand on Rana to steady yourself. Kratos walked behind you slowly, watching each step you took. He noticed that you had stopped shaking. 

“I… I don’t feel well.” You stated as the wave of extreme cold had suddenly dissipated. With the next step you took, the world had gone black.

Kratos had caught you from falling flat on your face with one arm. 

You had passed out. 

He sighed and set down the basket and picked you up bridal style. Your body was cold to the touch, he looked down at your face. You looked like you were peacefully asleep, not suffering from hypothermia. He could see your chest rising and falling gently, so you weren’t dead. Although, I guess you wouldn’t stay dead. But, Kratos had died a few times himself and it wasn’t fun. It was quite painful and he didn’t want you to go through that.

Rana whined and nudged your foot that was dangling. Kratos looked at the wolf. 

“Get it.” He commanded, nodding his head toward the basket. 

Rana looked up at Kratos for a few moments. Then he walked over to the basket and used his mouth to carry it by the handle. 

“Good boy.” Kratos started to walk the path to the mystic gateway. He was just hoping there would be no more enemies to face. 

Your body started to shiver sightly, on and off. A good sign that you were starting to warm up.

After a few minutes of walking Kratos approached the mystic gateway, he adjusted his grip on you so he could get out the yggdrassil seed. You groaned, very slowly starting to become more aware. 

Kratos looked down at you, “(Y/n).” 

You groaned again, stirring slightly this time.

Kratos held up the seed and entered the gateway with Rana. 

“We are almost there.” He attempted to comfort you in case you could hear him.

Kratos was soon opening the door to Sindri’s house.

“You told me you would be back for dinner!” Sindri began to lecture Kratos, until he saw you in his arms. “Oh god… what happened?”

“They are ill.” He replied, walking to the makeshift bedroom and carefully laid you down on the bed. 

Sindri caught sight of Rana, “Oh no…” he was conflicted. You were sick, but there was a filthy wolf inside his house. 

Rana set down the basket and observed his surroundings. 

Sindri got a broom and had it outstretched and used it to poke Rana, “Shoo!”

Rana growled and turned his head and bit the broom, ripping it out of Sindri’s grasp and tossing it aside. 

Atreus heard the commotion and came out of his room, “Is my father here?” He questioned, then spotted the predicament Sindri was in. 

“Uhh, Sindri, he’s not happy with you.” He could sense the wolf’s annoyance.

“I can see that!” Sindri yelped, “Get it out of here!”

Atreus took a few steps toward Rana, “Hey, boy.” 

Rana was still growling as he turned his head to Atreus.

“It’s okay…” He tuned into Rana’s feelings. “He’s just scared. (Y/n) got hurt. And he’s not leaving them.” Atreus looked to Sindri.

“Ugh..” Sindri threw up his hands in defeat.

“He’s clean, Sin’.” Atreus tried to ease his friend’s anxiety, “He’s white, so you’d be able to see any dirt on him… I’m gonna go check on (y/n).” He walked to the doorway of his father’s room. 

Kratos was kneeling beside your bed. He had gathered every blanket he could to lay on you and lit a few candles in the room to have some light. 

“Are they okay?” Atreus spoke up softly. 

“I think so.” Kratos had gotten you to stop shaking, you should wake up soon. “Did you meet the wolf?”

“Yeah,” Atreus smiled, leaning against the door frame, “He’s cute.”

Right on cue, Rana nudged his way past Atreus and gently hopped up on the bed with you and laid himself down on you. 

“Mh, I thought you would like him.” Kratos hadn’t taken his eyes off you. 

“Father, do you… do you think you might…like (y/n)?” Atreus asked cautiously.

“I like all our friends.” He replied. 

“No, not like that…” Atreus sighed, “Like… you know… do you like them?”

Atreus attempted to clarify. He had noticed his father acting a little bit different today, he seemed to listen to you. Usually if he turned something down, the other person wouldn’t ask again. Or if they did, they were met with a stern ‘No’. But if you were persistent with him, he wouldn’t get angry. He saw you getting his father to eat a snack before he left with Brok. Sindri had been offering snacks him for years, and he always declined.

Before Kratos could answer, you were stirring and opened your eyes.