#and when he naturally loses bc of it its all pinned on him despite it being out of his control

[vaugarde]

remembering when i watched the indigo league arc properly in 2020 and watching the episodes beforehand i was like “ok wow team rocket is actually really fucking annoying at this point. oh well though, we’re getting to the climax of the kanto arc, we’ll get a break from them then bc thats how it is in the other arcs” and then i slowly became the joker when the more the arc progressed

[1kook]

disney+ & bust

this is part of my netflix & chill collection !

summary; There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb. It’s not. It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door.  warnings; arguments, feelings of insecurity, bit of asshole jk, smut in the forms of degradation, dumbification, choking, fingering, spit kink, self punishment, unprotected but [ passionate ] sex, jk losing his cool, return of mean jk, he is actually an emotional mess in this one wtf miscellaneous; ANGST, anniversaries, the L word😳, app developer kook, rip ‘pretty girl’ </3, we all become phineas and ferb stans word count; 13k !!

notes; me: *writes couple who’s whole arc is being silly* y’all: MAKE THEM SUFFER GIVE US ANGST!! u ask I deliver so now we all suffer 😐 ngl it was hard writing this fic n u might notice there’s some parts that seem weird n that’s bc this was TWO fics w diff wording but I ended up mixing them bc I’m insane. still had a lot of fun! felt like I challenged myself!! not proofread bc when I say we suffer we SUFFER

please let me know what you think!!! a simple ask goes a long way <3

previous part: kissanime & foreplay

Approximately one week after The Bullet Bestie’s rise to prominence, Jungkook grows annoyed with it as his weirdly competitive nature rears its ugly head the more and more orgasms that little vibrator coaxes out of you. It turns on a weird switch in him, something slightly stuck up and snooty that he’ll never admit to out loud but is there nonetheless. By the following Friday, The Bullet Bestie is nestled deep in your garbage can and Jungkook’s back to pleasuring you with his tongue and fingers alone.

He had those moments in him, the ones where he liked to think he was better than any and everyone else, and occasionally they manifested against inanimate objects like a bullet vibrator.

Despite his polite and generally soft exterior, you catch glimpses of that cocky spirit more than anyone else. Over the past year, you’ve come to realize that Jungkook’s personality was like a coin that had been left out in the sun too long. He had this sweet and reserved nature you saw most times, a kindhearted boyfriend who adored you almost as much as you adored him. He was your angel whom you knew had a heart of gold, even if you were slowly bringing out his more childish tendencies. You knew him like the back of your hand, knew what his mom’s favorite color was and how he liked to stack the plates in his cabinet according to size and make. It was a side that was rusted from years of being out in the sun, basking in its adoring warmth, and you loved every inch about it.

And still, there was this other side to him you rarely saw. This cocky asshole who hid beneath the soft smiles and careful hands, making his appearance only through sly smirks and a tongue prodding against the inside of his cheek. He was a braggart, a man who knew his greatness yielded for no one and wanted that fact shoved down everyone’s faces. This Jungkook, this other side that never saw the light of day, was like the Hyde to his Jekyll. An unexpected, almost mean side to him that only dared make his appearance when his exhilaration was at an all-time high. Like when he was fucking you into another dimension, or kicking your ass in Mario Kart, or like now, when he was receiving an award at an annual tech ceremony.

On the eve of your one year anniversary, Jungkook’s company invites him to an awards ceremony for other web and app developers like him. It’s a grand event, filled with all the biggest nerds in the developing industry here to present the baby nerds with awards. Jungkook lies somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, both a seasoned player and a rookie all at once. He spends the night tolling you around in a floor-length gown and fangirling over all the “legends” in the room.

You know next to none of these people and none of their accomplishments but still pretend you respect them to hell and back. By the end of the main dinner, you’re sympathizing with Barbie’s ever-smiling features because your cheeks feel sore.

Towards the end of the night, Jungkook wins that random award— okay, who were you fooling? He wins the Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award, recognizing him for all the hard work you’ve seen him put in this past year. It’s probably the highest recognition he can receive at this point in his career. It was an esteemed award that was bestowed upon only the most innovative developer of the year among tech companies, something Jungkook had briefly mentioned he always wanted. It’s basically the equivalent of placing first place in his field, but given Jungkook’s competitive industry and his young age, you think it’s like telling all these old Facebook lords to suck his big fat cock. (But that was your job when you got home.)

He gives a short little thank you speech, promising to work hard and own up to this title. The people around you are swooning, obviously endeared with his soft puppy dog features and melodic voice. They don’t know him like you do, don’t know that uppity twist to his grin like you do. It doesn’t slip off his face even when he steps down off the stage, arms wide open as he comes barreling towards you. Even with you in his arms, the congratulations that are thrown from every direction ring loudly in his ears and swell that ego of his.

The night goes like that for the most part, Jungkook’s acquaintances approaching him every few minutes to rain down their praises. He goes a little crazy at the open bar after a while, shoving the gold trophy into your arms as his beloved work seniors whisk him off for drinks. You don’t mind because you resigned yourself to a night of playing Jungkook’s perfectly perfect partner anyway, watching him politely mingling with his coworkers. Despite his earlier success, you know he won’t brag about it verbally. No, he’ll wait until the two of you get home—your place or his—and remind you how amazing he is with a quick snap of his hips.

As you said, he’ll never boast aloud.

However, that doesn’t mean you won’t.

“That’s my boyfriend,” you explain to the seventh person that greets you that night, excitedly pointing to where said boyfriend was slowly losing all sense of self by the bar. You don’t know anyone here beside Jungkook, and you’re pretty sure no one in their hammered minds is going to remember who you are anyway, so a little gloating never hurt anyone. “He won the ‘I’m Better Than Everyone Else’ award tonight,” you emphasize to the tipsy woman beside you who only laughs at your exaggeration. You assume she’s like you, accompanying one of the many developers here, because as soon as you finish boasting about Jungkook she moves to brag about someone too.

Truth be told, you spend the whole night re-analyzing the Zootopia movie you saw on Disney+ the other night in your head. So if the little fox fellow didn’t control himself would the city have fallen to ruins? Why was the useless sheep girl so evil and bitter? Why was there an unreal amount of romantic tension between the fox and the rabbit? Whatever, you’ll have to rewatch it some other night, and with your new Disney+ account, you could watch it anywhere you wanted to.

Now, you had never bothered to purchase a Disney+ subscription or even tried to swindle Jungkook for his password before. As far as you know, Disney+ was filled with old tv shows from your childhood, sitcoms that made you laugh when you were ten. There’s nothing wrong with that, but personally, you were a firm believer that that which was perfect should not be touched once finished; in other words, you were utterly terrified you’d rewatch an old episode of The Wizards of Waverly Place, only to find out the same joke you’ve been regurgitating for the past ten years doesn’t actually go that way.

However, the harsh reality was that Disney+ was good for a few things. Ugh, you hate when giant corporations provide decent services. Aside from Zootopia, you’ve watched about every animated media on there as well, all of which you replay in your mind as Jungkook has the time of his life with these nerds, knocking back champagne glass after champagne glass.

Anyway, the night ends a little past midnight, and Jungkook who is buzzed on alcohol and high on exhilaration ends up calling an Uber for the two of you. Your apartment— the new one he had not only helped you hunt for but also helped you move into, greatly cutting the cost of movers out with those glistening biceps and thick thighs —is still going through her rebellious phase where the potted plants are trying to take over, courtesy of Kim Namjoon. So for now, there’s a potted plant in an awkward corner that both of you stub your toe against on your way to your bedroom.

You’re thinking Jungkook is going to go to town tonight, given the fact he’s on Cloud 9 and has had his ego stroked by a bunch of dudes for the past couple hours. Maybe you guys can try out the hot role-playing scenario you saw on GirlsWay a few weeks ago, or the handcuffs you impulsively bought from Amazon one Monday night. Or maybe, and this one really makes you flutter, he’ll let you fully take the reins for once.

All those lewd fantasies end up being for naught because just as you shimmy out of your gown (with the help of his hands, of course) and turn to climb him like a tree, he’s on the other side of the room getting your makeup remover out for you. And also talking. A lot. And way more than usual.

“Did you see him, babe?” he sighs, dare you to say, dreamily, handing you the cotton pads as he begins pulling a million pins out of your hair. Slowly and with a lot of confusion, you pull your fake lashes off and begin cleaning your face. “He was amazing.”

“Uh-huh,” you say, having absolutely no idea who ‘he’ is or why Jungkook is so in love with him and not you at this very moment. “But so were you,” you add. Perfect. Stroke his ego and then stroke his cock.

Jungkook sputters at your praise. He’s carefully placing your hairpins on your thigh, cheeks flaming red every time he leans over you. “Was I?” he murmurs, voice sweet in that cute little way it always gets when he’s downed one too many shots of whiskey, enough to be buzzed but not enough to be wasted.

You turn and the pins clatter to the floor and across the bedsheets. “Yes,” you confirm, ignoring his sad huff at the mess you’ve made. Instead, you grab him by the collar of that pink button-up he taunted you with all night. “You were fucking incredible and I think incredible men deserve to have their dick sucked.”

Jungkook laughs at your vulgar statement, holding you gently by the hips as you climb into his lap. “Is that so?” The soft, shy persona is gone now, replaced by the gentle stirring beneath his dress pants. You nod hurriedly, plopping down on his lap and running your hands through his styled hair.

“Yes,” you confirm, kissing the corner of his mouth. “Luckily for you, I know this nymphomaniac who would gladly gobble up your cock at your every command.”

He snorts just as you push him into his back, nose adorably scrunched up. “First of all, you know I hate that word,” he chuckles, finally gracing you with a sweet peck that only makes you want him to fuck you into the fifth dimension. “Secondly, please don’t ever say you’ll gobble my cock up ever again.”

Something inside of you squeals with excitement as he rolls the two of you over, firm body pressing down on yours. “Oh, baby,” you groan, lazily throwing a leg over his hip. Jungkook grins and then decides to entertain you for a few minutes with a sloppy kiss.

You say a few minutes because just as things are heating up, he pulls away. He smiles apologetically. “As much as I’d love to be here with you, I actually have an early morning tomorrow.”

You frown at the sudden change in events. “Huh? They’re gonna make you work the morning after a Gatsby party?” you gasp, sitting up as he gets off of you. With every step he takes away from the bed your heart breaks a little more. “They can’t do that— that’s illegal!”

From the doorway he levels you with a comically raised brow. “No, it’s not.”

You scamper after him down the hall, watch the muscles in his back flex as he pulls his suit jacket on. “You can’t work on our anniversary— that’s illegal!” you offer instead.

He stops at your front door, feet squeezed back into his shoes. “Baby, it’s not,” he rolls his eyes, leaning down to peck your forehead. “It was either I work in the morning or work at night,” he explains, giving your messy hair a soothing caress. He’s looking at you with those eyes, the ones that make your heart lodge itself into your throat and make life a tightrope experience. There’s a devastatingly lovesick part of you that wants this moment, this kind face, to be engraved into your mind for the rest of your life. You want this to be the first and last thought you have and nothing else: just Jungkook’s adoring gaze on you for the rest of time.

The moment ends too soon when he flutters one last peck against your lips. “I’ll be done in the afternoon, okay?”

You pout. “Okay, your place?” you huff, making sure to get one last octopus squeeze around his waist. He nods. “Promise you won’t be late?”

The corners of his gaze soften. “You know I won’t,” he smiles, leaning down to bump your noses together playfully. “Can’t stay away from my pretty girl too long. Besides, I have a gift for you tomorrow.”

It’s with that sentiment and a hammering heart that you let him go. With Jungkook gone, there’s really nothing for you to do now. You took the next two days off in preparation for your anniversary sex, so you don’t have to head to sleep early like usual.

With nothing else planned, you decide on rewatching that Zootopia movie that had plagued you all night, ready to dissect every plot hole to hell and back. You don’t think Jungkook’s seen this movie yet so you add it to your long list of animated movies you’re forcing him to watch.

Part of you is actually really surprised Jungkook left. Well, kinda sorta, very, but not really. Jungkook was a good boy, that much was obvious. He took his job seriously, and if his job wanted him to come in at the asscrack of dawn, then he’d come in before the sun even rose. He was a goody-two-shoes, but even so, you were occasionally able to bring out that darker side in him.

Jungkook working, like actually working in an office setting, was pretty rare though. The dude had a chill job that let him stay home most of the time, and essentially clock in whenever he wanted. Every now and then you were able to convince him to stay, tucking him beneath your body or the covers, depending on the night, and refusing to let him go the morning after.

Once he had eaten you out until the wee hours of the day, ravenous between your thighs, and then went to work the next morning like he hadn’t broken you. Another time you had persuaded him into watching every season of the 2017 DuckTales reboot through the night. When the alarm had rung in the middle of the season finale, he had simply gotten into your shower and gone off to work.

So maybe you were a little confident in your skills, and Jungkook slipping between your fingers tonight was a huge bummer. But there was no use crying over spilled milk, you tell yourself, flinging your bra off somewhere in the corner as you snuggle back into your sheets. You’re ready to tear this Zootopia movie apart, scene by scene.

Even though your apartment is a little cold, you’re comforted by the fact Jungkook will be here to keep you warm all day tomorrow.

All men do is lie.

Despite his promise to come home early the next day, Jungkook ends up lying. The meeting he had been in all morning— the same one that had stopped you from getting bent like a pretzel the night before —drags on well past noon. Then, Kim Namjoon, AKA Jungkook’s favorite senpai in the entire world, catches wind of Jungkook’s success last night and absolutely has to take him out to lunch to celebrate.

You scoff, glaring down at your phone and the impulsive messages you’d sent out an hour ago when Jungkook had first texted you telling you he would be late.

You whirl around to stomp off in the direction of his living room, where all of yours and Jungkook’s favorite foods were growing colder by the minute. You had spent the longest time carefully laying them out, making sure the fried chicken was closer than the pizza but not closer than the breadsticks. Truthfully it’s a nightmare. There are about eight stomach aches worth of food sitting on his coffee table, the greasy stench makes you gag and will certainly stick to your hair for weeks, but none of that mattered because it was all for your beau.

Your very late beau who was making you grow more and more agitated with each minute that passed. Ugh! How inconsiderate of him to test your patience on a day like this. You didn’t want to be upset with him, but this was your first, real milestone as a couple with him. You had wanted to spend the whole day cuddled up, maybe finally tell him how much he really meant to you— definitely not waking up alone with eyeliner crusted eyes and an aching heart.

Deciding you’re being a little too dramatic, you head into the bedroom to calm down. This was fine, you tell yourself, carefully laying out the damn near harlotrous lingerie you had yet to put on. Jungkook would come over soon and everything would be A-okay.

Except for the part it’s actually F-not okay because soon it’s nearing sunset and the food has gone cold so you’ve stocked it into the fridge, and the pretty sheer bra has a wonky wire that’s two seconds away from piercing through your heart, but that doesn’t even matter because Jungkook being late for your all-day anniversary celebration has already ripped it to shreds anyway.  

You plop down on the couch in defeat, impulsively opening up the Disney+ app to cry through another episode of Phineas and Ferb. You’ve abandoned the satin robe that came with the lingerie in favor of donning a big t-shirt that smells like him and makes your heart hurt even more. The setting sun paints the living room in muted oranges, the chirping of birds outside the soundtrack to your lonely day.

You end up watching some other cartoon on Disney+, avoiding the Marvel section because you had promised Jungkook he could be there when you lost your Marvel virginity. Well, at least one of you was good at keeping promises, you think bitterly. For a second, you think about randomly watching one of the infamous MCU films out of order just to spite him. But then you think of that soft puppy gaze and how disappointed he’d be in you.

Whatever! It wouldn’t ever match up to the way you felt now.

Anyway, you circle back. When you’re five episodes into Phineas and Ferb you hear the doorknob rattle.

You sit up just as the door swings open, visible from your spot on the couch. He meets your gaze almost immediately, big doe eyes caught in the act. What act? You’re not really sure. In fact, you don’t even know what you’re looking at when he walks in because he’s drowning in shopping bags. His lips twist into a grin. “Honey, I’m home,” he says playfully.

You don’t laugh.

Jungkook frowns, dumping all his bags down at the entrance before waddling over towards you. “Hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, coming to stand before you and cupping your face in his hands. He’s towering over you, so tall and gorgeous but for the first time, you’re not dazed by his beauty.

“Kook, you said you’d be back hours ago,” you say slowly, avoiding his gaze. You try to keep the frustration out of your voice, but you’ve had hours to dwell on it now, and those annoying cartoon characters, though charming at first, had only served to multiply your annoyance.  

Jungkook blinks, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I mean… yeah. But I got you presents?” he beams, glancing back at the mountainous pile he made by the door. You look over too. There are some luxury bags squeezed in between other shops you like, the occasional jewelers' logo on the side.

You stand with a sigh, sauntering off into the kitchen with him on your tail. “I don’t want presents,” you mumble, reaching to pour yourself a glass of water. You’re briefly aware of how childish you must seem. Jungkook hovers behind you.

“What? Yes, you do,” he says. “You had an entire wishlist on my Amazon of things you wanted.” It’s his turn to level you with an unreadable expression, slowly crossing his arms over his chest.

Your frown only deepens as you turn to match his stance against the counter. While it may be true that you did indeed have an entire list of impulsive items on his Amazon, that didn’t necessarily mean you wanted them all. Sometimes you just wanted to stare longingly at a pair of satin gloves without actually buying them. You don’t know how to explain this much to him. “They’re not…” you stop with another deep breath. “Forget it. Thank you for the presents.”

Now it’s Jungkook’s turn to question you. “What,” he says in an unimpressed tone, padding over to you before you can escape back into the living room to watch the entire princess movie collection on Disney+. “No, tell me what’s wrong.”

For some reason, that’s exactly what you don’t want to hear. “Jungkook,” you say flatly, narrowing your eyes at him. “You come home six hours after you said you would without telling me why, and normally I wouldn’t care, but today was supposed to be a special day for us.”

Jungkook reels at your bluntness. “Babe, I was out getting stuff for you. I know it’s our anniversary— that’s why I wanted to treat you,” he responds, oddly condescendingly like you’re a child who doesn’t understand what exactly he was doing.

You brush his hands away from your shoulders. “Yeah,” you huff. “Now I know that. But I spent all day waiting for you,” you stress, chest puffing as you grow more and more agitated by his inability to understand you. God, can he let you go now? At least a bunch of animated, geometrically drawn cartoons won’t question you like this and make you feel as childish as he was.

When he doesn’t say anything else you stomp back into the living room, snatching up your phone from its forgotten spot against the couch. “I’m going to bed.”

At that Jungkook seems to kickstart back to life. “What? ___, it’s barely six,” he says as he follows after you into your bedroom. You ignore him, shuffling beneath the covers. In all actuality, you’re going to bed to mope and watch more animated family shows, maybe cry under the guise of the plot just being so sad. Jungkook sits beside you just as you click back on to finish off your episode. “Baby, I don’t get it,” he sighs. “You’re always talking about how much you want this or that, and I go out and get you it all but now you’re mad?”

You bite down on your lip, eyes lasered in on the pictures moving before you. “Jungkook, just forget it.”

“No,” he says, more sternly than he’s ever been with you before. “If there’s a problem, tell me.” There’s a heavy pause, and then he says, “don’t make me waste my time guessing what’s wrong, okay?” 

“Waste your time?” you scoff, sitting up with pinched brows that you find match his. “I’m not trying to waste anyone’s time— in fact, that’s hot coming from you, Jungkook.”

He rolls his eyes. “What are you even saying? You’re mad because I took a little long getting presents, for you, might I add,” he huffs, plopping down on the edge of the mattress beside your knee. “You’re always saying you want this and that, but you can’t handle me going out to get those things? Do you hear how weird you sound?”

You whip the covers off of you. “Me talking about things doesn’t always mean I want them,” you defend.

Jungkook snorts. “Yes, it does,” he says. “Anytime you ramble about stuff for minutes like a little kid it’s because you want me to buy it for you.”

You blink. “Like a little kid?” you repeat, stunned by his comparison. Granted, you always knew you were the more childish of the two, but you never thought that would equate Jungkook thinking of you as a child. Something red and nasty flares in your chest. “Well sorry,” you spit, crossing your arms over your chest defensively, “sorry we all can’t be perfectly mature golden boys who would never see the light of day if I constantly wasn’t dragging them out.” You know it’s a somewhat low blow, especially because Jungkook’s told you before how his introverted tendencies were a sensitive issue growing up, but you can’t help it.

Jungkook groans, dropping his head into his hands. “Baby, don’t do this now,” he warns, digging the heels of his palms into his eyes. “Stop acting like this.”

“Like how?” you spit, “like a kid?” Jungkook says nothing, leveling you with a blank stare from the corner of his eye. You roll your eyes, phone falling off your lap. Another episode of Phineas and Ferb had started, the corny opening tune filling the space between the two of you. “At least now I know what you think of me,” you mutter over the guitar riff.

“Oh my god,” Jungkook blurts, sitting up wildly. “Of course I’m gonna think of you as a stupid little kid, look at you,” he seethes, gesturing at the phone beside you. You flinch. “All you do is watch kids shows and whine whenever I wanna watch anything normal adults watch. You complain every single day about the most normal things, like your job? Why should I fucking care that you’re working a dead-end office job in a field you didn’t even study for— that’s not my problem, __!” he snaps, eyes narrowed into little slits. “I just won an award last night,” he says suddenly, voice back to its regular volume. “I’m at the height of my career and I’m only going up, but I can’t even enjoy that because I have to come home and cater to you,” he finishes, a loud scoff punctuating the final word.

You had never imagined Jungkook finally bragging about himself would be at your expense.

A beat of silence passes, the angry glint in his eyes quickly fading away the longer you don’t say anything. You sniff once, turning your head idly to the side where Phineas and Ferb is still blaring loudly from your phone speaker. Picking up the device, you throw it across the room where it hits his closet door with a terrifying bang the breaks the silence.

The sound snaps Jungkook out of whatever shock he’d been in. “Baby…” he says slowly, carefully, like you’re a caged animal that’s just escaped the zoo.

“I’m going home,” you say, also a little too calmly. You saunter over towards his closet where your shattered phone screen glares up at you as you yank a pair of sweats off a hanger. Jungkook is still frozen on the edge of the bed, watching you with wide eyes as you move about the room.

It’s when you’re in the hallway leading downstairs that Jungkook finally snaps out of his daze, scampering behind you as you descend the stairs. “Baby,” he rushes out, loudly bounding down after you, “___, wait,” he gasps, catching you by the kitchen counter collecting your keys. “I-I didn't mean that,” he rushes out, eyes wide and frantic as they flicker over your expression. “I don’t think that—I don’t, baby, please, just… let me explain, please.”

“Jungkook, let go of me,” you respond, shaking your wrist in an attempt to release yourself. He’s not even holding you tightly— he never would—but the sound of your heart pounding in your ears makes your movements jerky and erratic. “I wanna go home.”

“No,” he chokes, cornering you against the counter. “No, baby, please just listen to me, I-I—“

“You what, Jungkook?” you snap, placing a hand on his chest and forcefully pushing him away. He lets you, stepping back with a wobbly bottom lip. “You need to tell me how you’re too good for me? How much I hold you down because I wasn’t lucky enough to get a job like yours straight out of college?” He says nothing, swallowing roughly as you jab a finger into his chest. “Well let me tell you something,” you snarl, chest heaving, “I may be childish and a huge complainer, but I’m not stupid enough to let someone walk all over me like this.”

With that, you make your great escape. Truthfully, you don’t want him to see the tears in your eyes as you yank his door open, stomping down his steps and in the direction of the nearest bus stop. The door opens right after you tug it shut, painting your shadow across the sidewalk. There’s the scrambled sound of house slippers against the concrete that follows you down. “Go the fuck back inside,” you snap without missing a beat.

Sensing your obvious anger, he pauses before he can reach you. “Text me when you get home?” he calls out quietly.

“No,” you respond.

You would never admit to anyone that you spend the entire night eating a tub of mint chocolate ice cream. It’s disgusting and makes you gag, but it’s the only one you have in your apartment. And of course, it was brought over by none other than Jeon Jungkook himself a few days ago. Even when you’re trying to comfort yourself over how mean he was, on your anniversary night no less, you’re plagued by thoughts of him everywhere.

As much as you want to brush his words off, put on that cool girl exterior you’ve maintained since high school, there’s something different about this situation. You guess it’s impossible to brush off such hateful words when they come from someone you love and adore so much.

Were you too childish? You had always believed that side of you was what made your relationship with Jungkook so perfect. The two of you meshed well because of your differences, like yin and yang. So how had he been able to so easily deconstruct every inch of that balance in a matter of a few seconds? Was this perfect reality all in your head this whole time?

You want to tell yourself it was just a heat of the moment outburst from Jungkook, give him the benefit of the doubt because he’s never snapped at you like this before. Of course you’ve fought a couple of times in the past year, but neither of you had ever stooped as low as you did yesterday. Furthermore, the insecure part of your brain says he obviously felt this somewhere in his heart to bring it up at all. What he had said to you wasn’t something someone could make up on the spot.

You don’t text him when you get home, partly to spite him, but mainly because you had left your phone at his place anyway. You know he tried calling you last night because the call log is synced up to your laptop. He called on and off for about thirty minutes before he probably found your phone in his room. Whatever, he can mope in his regret for all you care

—is what you wanna say, but the longer he goes without showing himself to you the more your insecurities and hurt fester. Was this it? Was this the end of what was probably the best year of your life? It’s too painful to think about, to even consider the possibility that Jungkook might have gained a new insight last night and decided, hey, maybe this is for the best after all.

You drown yourself in an ungodly amount of sugar for breakfast, your laptop blaring yet another episode of Phineas and Ferb on the dining table. Muscle memory has you making Jungkook’s favorite pancakes before you can stop yourself, and by the time you do realize, you’ve resigned yourself to the blueberry smell anyway.

There’s a pounding on your door a little past noon, so hard and rough, that you almost think it’s the police finally coming to catch you for all your years of illegally pirating Phineas and Ferb.

It’s not.

It’s just a really drunk boyfriend wailing for your forgiveness at the door. You open the door with a fright, jumping back when he slumps forward and almost crashes face-first into the floor. “You didn’t call,” Jungkook cries, leaning a little too much of his weight onto you when you reach out to steady him.

The thundering of your heart slows upon registering it’s him. “Kook?” you frown, nose pinched at the ungodly stench of alcohol wafting off his clothes. “Have you been drinking?” you ask even though the answer is staring you right in the face (and in the nose).

He groans, staggering deeper into your arms. You blindly push the door shut behind him, resigning yourself to this new situation while your pancakes grow cold in the other room. “Baaaby,” he slurs, letting you guide him into the living space. He’s unceremoniously dumped onto the couch, half-opened eyes gazing up at you. “Let me,” a hiccup, “explain.”

You won’t lie. There’s a very obvious sense of discomfort sitting in your chest, torn between two paths that you don’t wish to choose between. His skin is warm and flushed like he’s just walked all the way here in this morning sun. You step over to the window that faces down onto the street below. There’s no sign of his car; you would have killed him if he ever tried to drive in this state.

“Did you walk here?” you ask instead, deciding there’s no need for one singular path, not when you can walk straight down the middle, both cleaning him and grilling him at the same time.

Jungkook’s response is delayed, head lolling from side to side as you help him out of his sweater. His skin is sweaty beneath, scorching to the touch. “Uh-huh,” he groans. Jesus, you sort of assumed but him confirming it really set things into perspective.

By no means did you and Jungkook live on opposite ends of the earth. On a good day, a drive from your place to his took about ten minutes. But walking? Easily an hour. Had he walked all the way from his place, drunk on top of that?

You brush his hair away from his face, his eyes fluttering shut at your touch. His lips are pouty yet chapped, dehydrated from the sun and the alcohol he reeks of. “Sit up for me,” you instruct, scampering off to your room for chapstick and water.

“Anything for you,” Jungkook wheezes, throat probably dryer than a desert. When you return, he’s two seconds from face planting into the coffee table and breaking that pretty face of his. You catch him with a hand on his shoulder, keeping him balanced. “Tell me what to do,” he chokes out, voice hoarse.

“Just need you to drink some water,” you say, pressing a cup against his lips. He drinks it, but a drop still dribbles down his chin.

“No,” he groans, catching your wrist in his hand when you reach up to apply some chapstick on him. “Tell me what to do,” he stresses, “to fix this. Fix us.”

His words make you pause, the tube of chapstick hovering over his plush lips. “You don’t have to do anything,” you respond quietly, trying to finish the application so you can pull away.

Jungkook doesn’t let you go. You try to look away, but there’s something about him that looks off. Maybe it’s the raw skin under his eyes, red and swollen. Or the sad droop to those same eyes that hold you captive. Or maybe it’s the subtle tremble in his hands, the fingers that hold tightly to your wrist, not to keep you there but to ground himself. “I don’t wanna lose you,” he rasps out, shakily bringing your hand to his mouth, where he presses one airy kiss to your knuckles. “Tell me ho-how to fix this and I’ll do it,” he pleads, a vulnerable look in his eyes.

Unable to withstand the sheer amount of agony on his expression, you look away. “___, please,” he chokes out, stumbling off the couch in his drunk and desperate haze until he’s kneeling in front of you. “I can’t… I can’t,” he sniffles, tears clouding those pretty eyes you’ve come to love so much. “I don’t know who I am without you.”

You clench your jaw. “You’re Jeon Jungkook,” you murmur, slipping your hand out of his hold to run through his hair. It’s knotted and a little too greasy, two things Jungkook would usually never allow. “This year’s Platinum Mobile Standard of Excellence Award recipient,” you remind him, trailing your thumb across his cheekbone when he turns to look up at you with those big Bambi eyes. “Sweet and shy, but you love being rowdy with your friends. You love movies and TV and organizing your shirts according to fabric type. You work harder than anyone I know and never complain. You date me, even though I’m a huge child,” you smile sadly.

“No!” he jumps, turning that frantic stare back into you. “Y-You’re not— it’s not,” he stammers, words still slurring together. “I’m a liar,” he cries, resting his forehead on your knees. His shoulders shake. “I don’t deserve you,” he weeps quietly. You place a hand on his shoulder. “Y-Y-You make my life so much better, ___, so colorful and fun. I-I wish I knew you in high school,” he admits, “maybe I wouldn’t have been so emotionally constipated now.”

“You’re not,” you reassure him softly.

He disagrees. “You bring out the best,” he hiccups, “the best in me.” Your heart skips in your chest. “I-I love you, you know that?”

You sputter, eyes wide at his sudden confession. “I… love you so much, y’know? I think about you ev-every night, ___,” he rambles, eyes dreamily gazing off into some miscellaneous spot on the wall behind you. “I can’t get you out of my head. Like you're a song, o-on repeat but it’s not annoying because it’s my favorite song, and I could listen to it for the rest of my life, y’know? My favorite song, I know all the words b-because it’s all I think about! I love... My love… I love you so much.”

“Kook,” you rush out, cheeks flaming as you try to pull him away from where he’s slumped over your legs. His passionate speech has you abuzz, body tingling everywhere until you feel overwhelmed, head spinning like you’re on a rollercoaster. “Let’s get you to bed.”

He nods sleepily, seemingly coming down from whatever alcohol induced rampage has allowed him to walk for an hour straight in this searing heat just to confess to you. “Y-You don’t have to say it back,” he continues to stutter as you guide him through the living room on wobbly legs. “I just-I just— can I?” he babbles. “Can I love you, ___?”

You pass through the kitchen space, where whatever you were watching on Disney+ is blaring loudly. It distracts Jungkook for about two seconds before his attention returns to you. When you don’t answer, he presses on. “Is that okay?” he asks, whirling around to face you, catching your shoulders in his hands. He towers over you by the entrance to your bedroom, dark curls tickling your forehead. His eyes are dark and glazed over, both in tears and an emotion so raw and unfiltered it squeezes around your chest until you can’t breathe. “Is it okay for me to love you?” he murmurs softly, knocking his nose against yours.

Your cheeks blaze. “Yes, th-that’s fine, Kook,” you blubber, placing a hand over his chest, where his heart is also hammering away. “Just need you to go rest now, okay?”

He nods sleepily, nudging your nose with his one last time, like a soft almost-kiss, before letting you push him into the room. “Yes, yes,” he breathes, his body finally crashing from his adrenaline spike. He flops down onto the bed unceremoniously, dark waves fanning across your pillows. You try to wiggle him out of his shirt, but it only gets about halfway up his chest before he blindly reaches for the covers. His legs stick out awkwardly, clad in the sweatpants you’ve come to associate with him.

When he’s all swaddled up in your blanket he finally goes limp, tiny snores leaving his lips as he dozes away from reality. You sigh, pressing a palm to his forehead. He’s still warm and clammy, but at this point, there’s nothing you can do but wait for him to sober up.

With a final kiss to his forehead, you leave the room, closing the door behind you before sliding against the wooden surface. There’s a trapped bird in your chest, wildly flapping its wings in an effort to get out, and it’s all stupid Jungkook’s fault in the next room. Stupid Jungkook who demolished and remodeled your heart all in less than twenty-four hours. It doesn’t calm down, even when you rush off into the kitchen for a glass of water, or when you try to immerse yourself in some other show on Disney+. It stays beating against your ribs and your chest until you’re forcing yourself to sit down on the couch and process.

He wakes up a little before dinner. You hear him from the living room, where you’re flicking through the options on Disney+ for the nth time that day. You’ve seen the first fifteen minutes of about twenty different series and movies by now, always growing antsy and abandoning them early on. The only reason you know he’s awake is because the shower turns on for a few minutes, and then his bare feet are heard padding across the hallway back into your room.

By the time he resurfaces in the living room, you’ve resigned yourself to just more Phineas and Ferb, nonchalantly watching the silly cartoon. (Except you’re anything but nonchalant, and your heartbeat rings in your ears.)

Jungkook hovers by the door, clad in a pair of shorts he’s left here before, and a t-shirt you stole from him. “Hey,” he says quietly, lingering by the doorframe. You nod back in response. “Can I watch with you?” Again, another nod.  

Slinking over to the couch, he’s rather careful as he sits down, leaving a few inches of space between the two of you. You don’t even think he can see the screen of your laptop until he murmurs, “he’s my favorite character,” when Perry the Platypus appears on the screen.

You hum. “Thought you didn’t like these kids shows?” you ask. You don’t mean it to sound as petty and backhanded as it comes out, but that’s really no one's fault but his own.

Jungkook’s breathing tightens beside you. “No,” he admits, “I don’t. Only watch them because I know you like them.” You contemplate pausing the episode and engaging in a real conversation with him, but at this point, you’re very tired from the events of the last day. Jungkook doesn’t press either, just shuffles more comfortably beside you.

You get about five minutes in, quiet chuckles shared between the two of you, before he strikes. “I’m sorry about yesterday,” he says, so hushed you almost don’t hear it. His hand is resting in the space between you, pinky brushing against yours. “About… being late. And the presents.”

You inspire slowly. “That wasn't even the problem, silly,” you brush off. From your peripheral, you see Jungkook’s slow nod. “I didn’t want any presents,” you mention, “I just wanted you.” You look away from the screen immediately after, pretending like the spot on the ceiling is actually really interesting.

The two of you fall into silence, the animated characters on your screen rapidly chattering away. “Oh,” Jungkook says after a moment.

You roll your eyes. They’re moist but you don’t want him to see. “Yeah, oh,” you parrot back softly, relaxing into the couch again. “Did you eat the food I left out?”

Jungkook shuffles beside you, the soft lull of the speakers soon being cut as he reaches over to pause Phineas and Ferb. A couple of seconds pass and then he’s leaning into you, head resting on your shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, placing a palm over the hand he had been teasing for the past few minutes. “I thought I knew what I was doing but I was wrong.”

His voice is so soft and sincere, it makes your chest ache. You try to burrow your face against your opposite shoulder, try to hide the stray tear that escapes out of the corner of your eye. “It’s fine,” you brush off, voice choked off and hoarse.

Jungkook leans up, pecks your cheek so tenderly it makes you go mushy. “No, it’s not fine. I acted like a know-it-all and said something way out of line,” he murmurs, raising his head to look at you. His hand feels warm over yours. It’s the touch you craved all day and yesterday, the warm feel of his body against yours. You’re embarrassed at how easily you melt into it. “You’re the best thing that has happened to me in a long time,” he tells you, holding your hand close to his chest. “I had no right to say those things to you.”

You sniffle, resting your head against his shoulder now. His heart beats loud enough for you to hear. “Was it true?” you mumble. “Do you really think of me like that?”

He shakes his head, his soft breaths fanning across your forehead. “No, never,” he answers. “I think you’re incredible. My brain was just trying to justify my dumb anger.”

You nod, even if you don’t believe it just yet. But that was a conversation for later, you suppose, sometime in the future when you aren’t on the verge of tears and threatening to crumble apart at the simplest word that leaves his mouth.

“I should have come home like you wanted, thought about my words before saying them,” he says, snuggling closer to you. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop,” you sniffle, covering your face with your free hand as he presses a kiss to the vein that runs over the back of the hand he’s holding captive. “Now it just sounds like I'm just being inconsiderate of your gifts and a crybaby.”

Jungkook kisses your temple softly, gently. “Don’t think about the gifts,” he says. “Just tell me what you wanted to do, doll.”

His voice calms you, has you like putty in his arms. “Watch movies,” you mumble, toying with a thread on your couch cushion. “Be with you.”

He hums. “Then we’ll do that,” he says, reaching for your laptop again. The screen nearly blinds you when it flickers back to life before you, Jungkook’s low breaths against your ear making it near impossible for you to process the titles on the screen. “You liked Disney+?”

Belatedly, you nod. “I like the animated movies,” you admit quietly, the anxieties of before slowly melting away, even more so when he slides his arm around you, pulling you close against his chest.

Unlike other times where he’ll critique the hell out of such childish films, Jungkook says nothing as he starts up the Zootopia movie instead, the same one you had wanted to show him before, right from the beginning. “That bunny looks like you,” you murmur when Judy Hopps first appears on the screen.

Jungkook snorts. “You say that about every cartoon bunny.”

You turn your head to glance at him over your shoulder. He meets your gaze with a small smile you return. “It’s because you’re so cute,” you say softly, lips twisting playfully when his cheeks grow scarlet.

He knocks his forehead against yours, eyes fluttering shut. “Not cute, just lucky,” he chuckles. “Lucky enough to have you.” Your heart turns over in your chest, threatening to burst out of your rib cage at his words. You try to turn in his arms. Before you can say the words that have been sitting on the tip of your tongue for months now, he’s beating you to it once again. “I love you,” he confesses in a hushed whisper, no alcoholic influence. 

Something inside of you blossoms, eyes wide as he chastely kisses you. He pulls away without you ever reacting, too caught up in surprise to kiss him back properly. He stays close, curls tickling your forehead as he leans over you. “You don’t have to say it back, I just wanted you to know. I love you,” he says again, long lashes blinking down at you. “So much. It makes me feel like a stupid teenager again, going to the mall to buy a gift for my crush.” He laughs sheepishly, reaching down to tangle your fingers together. “Is that okay?” he asks quietly, pressing a kiss to your knuckles.

It mirrors the confession he’d given you that morning, those slurred words and teary eyes. It had been difficult to pinpoint the legitimacy of it before, the meaning scrambled by his hazy mind. But with him staring at you like this now, like you single-handedly plucked the stars from the sky to put them in those sparkly eyes of his, it makes something inside you ache.

Still, you choke on your own spit. “I-Is it okay for you to love me?” you sputter incredulously, realizing the oddity of the same question he’d thrown at you earlier. But now, you’re both sober and you can really tear apart that sentence. Jungkook nods a little too seriously for your liking. “Are you crazy?” He blinks in confusion, brows pulling together as you slowly but surely lose the last bits of your sanity. “You’re an idiot, Jeon Jungkook,” you huff, “a stupidly handsome, rich, walking dream, idiot who goes out with stupid girls like me.”

“Not stupid,” he murmurs, closing in on you again as he finally understands the truth behind your masked insults. He smells minty and like his favorite body wash of yours.

“No,” you deny. “You’re actually, like, insane. You have a bachelor pad, make enough money to sustain an entire litter of kittens, look and talk like every teenage girl’s dream boyfriend— but you mess it all up by dating evil, conniving hoes like me who lose their shit over Disney cartoons.” He says nothing, watching you with an amused grin as you talk over yourself, basically regurgitating his statement from yesterday except it kinda seems plausible now that you’re over it. “It’s stupid. No, you’re stupid. No— I’m stupid.”

Jungkook chuckles, kissing the corner of your mouth gently. “Done?” he says, a dimple appearing on his cheek. You could kiss it away, but you need him to know the amount of stupidity in this room was astronomically high. “You’re not stupid, baby,” he says. You level him with a look. “Well. You have your moments.”

“Moments?” you repeat, standing up in a hurry that has him flopping down beside you. Your laptop is lost somewhere on the cushions, the voices faded as they grow farther away. “I am so stupid. I called Namjoon a whore for taking you out for lunch!” you cry. “I am the stupidest person in the world.”

Jungkook cackles, standing up beside you. “Yes, yes, you’re my stupid girl,” he teases, tapping the pout on your lips playfully. “So stupid she slanders herself instead of just telling me she loves me too.” He bumps your noses together, dark eyes staring at you almost daringly after his claim.

You fold soon enough. “I love you,” you mumble, “even if I’m too stupid to say it.”

He rewards your confession with a kiss, pulling you into his arms soon after. He sighs, almost wistfully. “Whatever shall I do with my very stupid girl?”

After exactly three minutes of feeling safe and loved in his arms, he abandons the living room in favor of leading you back to your room, where he pushes you down against your mattress. You cling to him, leaving him positioned over you at an angle. His chest presses against yours, arm curled around the back of your head. “Gotta get up, baby,” he laughs.

You shake your head, caging him in your arms. “Nuh-uh,” you murmur, legs wiggling when he places a hand on your hip.

Jungkook chuckles, pressing a kiss against the side of your ear. “Your movie is still playing in the other room,” he reminds you, thumb drawing soothing circles on your hip. You don’t release him, his mindless touch only encouraging you to keep him close. “Babe?”

You say nothing, relishing in the comfort of Jungkook’s presence. His hair smells good and feels even softer against the side of your face. The cotton shirt he found is crumpled beneath your fists, dark blue pattern wrinkling. Finally coming to terms with his new home, Jungkook eventually relaxes into your hold with a sigh.

“Alright,” he hums, patting your hip as he repositions himself more comfortably. “I get it. My pretty girl must’ve missed me, huh?” You nod, soaking in every detail about him in this moment. Jungkook shifts, the hand on your hip suddenly falling over your thigh instead. “Or should I say my stupid girl?” he purrs, hand slipping between your thighs. “My stupid, little girl?”

A gasp catches in your throat when he runs his fingers over the front of your panties. Your legs kick out wildly at the sudden touch, toes curling at the hands you dreamt about all day and night. “Oh,” you pant, each brush of his fingers feeling better than the last.

“What?” he says, mouthing against the side of your neck. His tongue feels warm, but the trails of saliva he leaves have you shivering. “Too dumb to speak?” he scoffs, biting down against a particular spot on your neck. You whimper, unsure if it’s because of his hands or his mouth.

“N-No,” you try to sneer back, fingernails digging into his skin through his shirt. His hands are getting braver now, the pad of his pointer finger dancing over your engorged clit. The sheer material of your panties certainly doesn’t help, each touch feeling like it’s being magnified three times over. And if it felt this good with underwear, you can’t even begin to imagine how it’d feel without.

You don’t have to ponder for long, because soon after Jungkook is slipping his hand beneath your waistband, touching your sensitive pussy head-on. “Kook.”

He uses your momentary vulnerability to ease himself from your hold, finally recoiling enough to smother your mouth with his. You moan in surprise, thighs quivering as he gets to work circling your hardened bud sans your panties. Jungkook isn’t the least bit kind as he kisses you ruthlessly, likes he’s trying to compensate for something with his movements. When he finally pulls away it’s with an obnoxious pop and cherry red lips. He huffs, glancing down to see where he’s got his fingers pleasuring you.

Your thighs are squirming back and forth, closing around his hand every few seconds. Jungkook snorts. “Huh, look at that,” he mutters, trailing down until his fingers are gliding over your quickly sopping folds. “Stupid girl is good for something.”

Your cheeks burn. “Kook, I’m not—“

Jungkook levels you with an unimpressed glare. “Not what? Not stupid? But I could’ve sworn you just spent the last few minutes saying you were,” he drones meanly, landing one light slap against your cunt that makes your hips buck.

You bite down a whimper. “I was just…” you trail off, eyes rolling back when he teases one finger against your opening.

“Kidding?” he supplies. “Well, I wasn’t.” Your heart stutters in your chest, eyes growing wide as he finally pushes himself off of you, propping himself up with an elbow beside your head. His gaze is dark and unrecognizable. “I think you’re so fucking stupid, doll,” he sneers. “And what are you gonna do about it?”

You should have seen this moment coming, the manifestation of that shiny side of the coin finally reaching its full potential.

While Jungkook wasn’t exactly shy about his interests, he certainly wasn’t tripping over himself to tell you every new kinky thing he wanted to try. You sort of guessed he had some interest in this sort of play a few weeks ago when you watched the Barbie movie at his place. A lot of that night had branded itself into your three am wet dreams, but there was one particular moment that stood out to you. That was you, on your knees, with him condescendingly patting your head. Or just last week, you vaguely remember the term slipping through his lips as he pleasured you with The Bullet Bestie.

The thing about Jungkook was that, until last night, he would have never admitted, or so much as even thought, that he was better than you. That was fine because you would say it enough for the both of you anyway. Did you think Jungkook was amazing, an absolute diamond among these measly rocks? Absolutely. (Were you slightly biased because you were his girlfriend? Skip.) However, you also had this insane evil villain complex that made you want to brag about everything you possibly could, especially if that meant bragging about your boyfriend.

Realistically speaking, he was better than you, that much you could look past yesterday’s anger to admit, and not even in a stuck-up, conceited way; he had a really good job, an architecturally amazing house, and a hot girlfriend. Meanwhile, you had a mediocre job, an okay apartment, and an insanely sexy Calvin Klein boyfriend, half of which he had pointed out yesterday. Regardless of how powerful that third factor was, he still outnumbered you three to one.

Sue you, Jungkook was amazing. Anyone could see that! Except, maybe, himself.

And if the only time Jungkook would openly brag about his greatness or establish how much better than you he was, was in a post-fight, sex-induced setting, then you were more than happy to be his punching bag. So long as it was on your terms, and not as a result of his weirdly bottled up feelings.

(Yeah, you would have a long talk about that tomorrow.)

But for now, you pout up at him, clamping your thighs shut purposefully. “You’re stupid too,” you defend, “stupid and mean.”

Something in his expression changes. Suddenly, he’s moving at superhuman speed as he snatches his hand out from where you had previously trapped him between your legs, yanking you up by the front of your shirt. “Mean?” he mocks. “Isn’t that what you always wanted?” You shiver, fingers wrapping around the wrist that holds your sweater. “Wanted me to be mean and push you around like a little rag doll?”

Jungkook looks at you for another two seconds, before he’s slowly pulling away from you, leaning back on his knees. His tongue is pressing against the inside of his cheek, jaw tightening from the movement. “Baby,” he says so quietly it instills a prickle of fear in you, tainted with delicious excitement.

“Yeah?” you whisper, sitting up tentatively as you watch him, He was a bit frightening, like a wild animal about to devour you whole.

Jungkook rolls his neck, the joints in his spine cracking as he begins tugging off his shirt. You salivate at the sight, too focused on the sinewy muscles of his body to catch the dark gaze he levels your way. He throws it off to the side, his sleeve of tattoos that wraps around his bicep and begins to crawl down his chest wonderfully unobstructed now. “Eyes up here,” he says and you quickly meet his gaze. He leans forward, muscled arms coming to cage you against the headboard. “Stupid little sluts don’t have the room to make such comments,” he rasps out, unamused expression adorning his normally soft features. “Don’t you think so?”

“I-I don’t know,” you stammer, leaning away as he comes closer and closer, eventually just turning your head to the side to avoid that emotionless look. It’s the wrong move, and Jungkook lets you know as much by forcefully digging his fingers into your cheeks and turning your face back around to meet his gaze.

A hand grabs beneath your knee, tugging harshly until you’re flopping down onto your back with a squeal. You settle with his knee pressed hotly against your core. Jungkook stays towering over you. “Dumb little girls who make me watch cartoons,” he spits, tracing a hand over your chest, molding your breasts beneath his hands roughly enough to make you gasp. “And watch little animal movies on Disney+. Aren’t they just so stupid?”

“So stupid,” you concede, subtly shifting your hips for some desperately needed friction. Jungkook snorts, finally granting you your wish with one rough slide of his thigh against your core.

“I agree,” he says, and surprises you with a hand around your throat as he leans in to properly grind his thigh into you. “All they’re good for is being dumb little sluts with good pussy,” he murmurs darkly, thumb pressing into the side of your neck forcefully. “Sometimes, they don’t even do anything,” Jungkook continues, his other hand on your hip hauling you higher up his thigh. You mewl, soaked panties rubbing roughly against your folds. You miss the soft swirl of his thumb, the gentle prod of his fingers. Even so, you can’t deny this change in Jungkook is doing something to you, riling up a part of you that you hadn’t known existed. Maybe it’s the horniness from yesterday that was left unfulfilled, the one year anniversary sex that was put on pause. “Just lay there and take it, too fucked out and dumb to say anything.”

His fingers loosen for the briefest of seconds and you gasp for breath. “That’s terrible,” you whimper, rolling your hips up into his thigh, so close to his swollen cock.

Jungkook chuckles without an ounce of humor, pressing your foreheads together as he helps grind you to completion. “Isn’t it? I think that stupid little girl is cute though.”

“I’m sorry,” you blurt, vision spotting as he tightens his hand back around your throat. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” you moan, stomach tight from all the stimulation.

Jungkook hums, slowing you down with a tight grip on your waist. “Hm, what are you sorry for?” he croons, pink lips pulling into an evil smile. “You said you weren’t that stupid girl, __.”

You shake your head, trying to roll your hips up again but he’s holding you too tightly now, rendering you immobile beneath him. “I am,” you choke out shamefully, grabbing at the hand on your hip in a feeble attempt to remove it. “I am a stupid little girl.”

Jungkook smirks, leaning down to slot his mouth over yours. “That’s right,” he murmurs, “nothing but a dumb little slut.”

You shiver, opening your mouth when he slides his tongue against your bottom lip. He’s not the slightest bit nice, and more messy than usual. He pulls away with a bite to your lower lip, meeting your trembling gaze with that same unrecognizable glint in his eyes. “Come on, dummy, keep up,” he snarks before devouring you again. You try to, you really do, but he’s moving like an animal today, despite his slow and drunken movements from that morning. So you end up with his saliva dripping down your throat, clinging to the corners of your lips as he begins slowly grinding you against his thigh again. He flashes you a wicked smile, pearly teeth on display for you as he glances down at your messy appearance.

“Are you gonna touch me?” you ask, lower lip trembling at the thought after your desperate rutting. Jungkook purses his lips together in thought.

“Mmm,” he hums. “Don’t know yet.”

You whine. “Jungkook, please,” you whimper, wrapping your legs around his waist. “I need you.”

Jungkook chuckles, running his hand up your waist and taking your shirt with him. He slips his fingers beneath your bra, pushing the wire over your chest as he mouths at your neck. “Cute,” he says. “Can’t do it yourself?”

You tremble, chest arching into him as he rolls your nipple between his fingers. “I-I can,” you gasp. “Just feels better with you.”

Jungkook follows your statement with a nip against your skin, tongue soothing over it right after. “Why? Because I do everything better than you? Even make you cum better than you?”

Your cheeks heat up at his blatant ego rearing its head, hands carding through the hair at the nape of his neck. You say nothing, and that only eggs Jungkook on. “Come onnn,” he teases, finally, finally rolling his hips down onto your core. You squeak, head falling back against the pillows as you’re granted the one thing you’d been chasing. “Say it.”

“Say what?” you ask, voice wobbly as he continues to slowly rut against you, the front of his shorts pressing against the soaked crotch area of your panties. “Oh, oh, Jungkook,” you whine.

Suddenly he bites down harshly, teeth digging painfully into your skin. You yelp in surprise, pussy throbbing at the pain that shoots throughout your body. Jungkook pulls away and doesn’t bother soothing over it as he leans up to capture your jaw this time. “Say you’re a stupid little slut who can’t do anything without me,” he purrs, kisses too soft for the words he says.

Your mind blanks, torn between the humiliating phrase he wants you to say and properly checking him in his place. In the end, it’s with a twisted need to please him that you’re repeating the words back to him. “I-I’m a stupid slut,” you whimper, fingers digging into his shoulder blades as he continues pushing you right along the edge. The rope pulled tightly in your core is slowly being pulled apart, threads hanging on for dear life. “Can’t... can't do anything without...”

“Without who?” he asks, reaching down and untying the front of his shorts. “Can’t do anything without who, baby?”

“Without you, without you,” you cry, bucking your hips up against his, the combined movements of both your bodies making you shake like a leaf. “Ah, K-Kook,” you wail, hips stuttering as your orgasm finally swallows you up. Your panties quickly grow wet and icky from your own arousal that pools between your thighs. Jungkook lets you writhe beneath him as you chase your high, mouth sucking a pretty blossom against your jaw.

You know better than to expect the night to end here, especially after seeing the glint that had been in his eyes as he watched you unravel.

He leans close, let’s his nose brush against yours as you catch your breath. “So perfect for me,” he groans, slotting his lips against yours. You can barely keep up with him, languidly going along with his hot tongue. “Perfect, perfect girl,” he murmurs, a stark change from the less than friendly adjectives he used just moments before. “Tell me you love me?” he says softly.

You nod, mind fuzzy as you wrap your arms around his neck. “Love you,” you exhale, letting your fingers knot in his hair. Your proclamation does something to him, makes him grind the front of his cotton shorts hard against you. For someone that was often rough and brutal with you in bed, he sure was sensitive to the mushiest of things.

“Don’t deserve you,” he huffs, hot breath fanning across your skin. He switches gears fairly quickly. “Tell me you hate me,” he begs hoarsely, rutting against your soiled panties. “Tell me I’m a piece of shit and you could do better without me,” he pleads, voice too airy to be another one of his usual sex-induced thoughts.

You shake your head, pressing a kiss to his cheek as he rolls his hips. “It’s not true,” you whisper, “I love you more than you’ll ever understand.”

Jungkook groans, suddenly winding back and tearing your ruined panties down your legs. You gasp in surprise, letting him haul you about in his blind, self-inflicted rage. “Stupid, stupid,” he huffs, though at this point you can’t tell who it’s directed at. With your underwear out of the way, he wastes no time plunging his fingers back into your cunt, bypassing the tight ring of muscle around it without any of his usual care. “You should hate me,” he snarls, lips pressed against your ear.

You moan, back arching at the sudden pleasure that blossoms between your thighs. “I-I don’t,” you gasp, toes curling.

Jungkook groans, the sound traveling down your spine and straight into your pussy. “Stupid girl,” he huffs, slipping an arm around you to pull you so close until you can’t breathe, chests lined up together. His skin is warm to the touch, scorching almost. “Fuck,” he groans, curling his fingers inside of you. You whimper and moan, incapable of staying still beneath him as he tortures you with a thumb to your clit. “Tell me you hate me,” he seethes again.

Despite the fog that’s settled over your mind, you still manage a resolute shake of your head. “N-no,” you cry, digging your nails into his back. They run dark red lines over his skin, making him hiss at the sting.

Whatever punishment he’s trying to put himself through is falling through with your refusal to admit such a thing. It aggravates him even more, your adamant stance on loving him so, and he’s retracting his fingers before you can cum again. “Please,” he chokes, face tucked into your neck. He’s sloppy with his movements; as he pulls his shorts down and kicks them away, he nearly suffocates you with his weight. “I don’t deserve you, ___, please.”

“I love you,” you whimper for lack of explanation. Jungkook leans back, that same madman gaze in his glossy eyes. He’s looking at you in disbelief almost, pouty lips puckered and swollen. Your hands slip from around him, falling on either side of your head.

Like a cobra he strikes, collecting your wrists in one hand he pins above your head. The sudden movement has him leaning in close, lips brushing over yours. His lashes are coated in a wetness he refuses to acknowledge, looking at you like you drive him insane. “If you ever try to leave me,” he whispers, jerky breath fanning over your skin, “I’ll lose my mind.”

He loves you so much it aches.

“I won’t,” you whimper, feeling your own eyes well up with an emotion that consumes every inch of your being. “I’ll never leave you, you stupid, stupid boy.”

A faint smile crosses his features at your words, lips quirking to the side. You relish in it for all of two seconds before he’s ramming his cock into you, your sensitive walls spawning around him. You sob loudly, eyes rolling back into your head. Your legs instinctively hook themselves around his waist, digging into the base of his spine as he rolls his hips into you.

You feel full and complete like he belongs there in this moment and every moment after this. It makes your heart constrict painfully. Jungkook’s soft groans follow your more unraveled noises, the vulgar slapping of skin on skin the underlying melody to it all. “Ffffuck,” he spits, greedily swallowing your moans up. You whine, arms bucking in an effort to hold him close. But he’s determined in his act of restraining you, long fingers tightening around your wrists until they hurt. “I warned you, didn’t I?” he huffs, snapping his hips into you.

Your walls clench around his hard cock, the drag as he exits sending shivers throughout your body. Jungkook’s body towers over you, glistening in sweat as he nails you into your mattress. “Remember what I said?” he asks, voice but a shuddery exhale. You shake your head numbly, overwhelmed by the rough drag across your walls. “All those months ago, when you first came over,” he adds. The hand on your hip abandons its post to cup you beneath the jaw, palm pressing sinfully against your throat enough to block the tiniest of airflow. “I’ll fuck you and keep you forever,” he murmurs, voice deeper than the pits of hell. He licks a fat stripe over your cheek like you’re nothing but a sweet for him to devour. “Do you remember that, pretty girl?”

You nod jerkily, hips arching up into him when he thrusts into you again. It’s a memory that replays in your mind every so often, your first night with the man you had planned to humiliate over a mere misunderstanding, now your boyfriend of one year. “Want that,” you gasp, tears blurring your vision when he begins picking up the pace. “Wanna be y-your pretty girl forever.”

Jungkook groans, kissing the corner of your mouth. His thighs are some magnificent beings, keeping his pace consistent even as he loses himself in his overwhelming need to kiss you. “Always,” he manages, soft lips pressed against yours. “I won’t ever let you leave.”

A shriek tears itself from your lips as he picks up that harsh piston, releasing your jaw to hold both wrists above your head. It makes his curls dangle in front of his eyes, covering that beautiful dark gaze. It makes his thin little necklace swing back and forth too, though it’s too small to actually touch your face. The rhythmic swing has you hypnotized, just like everything else about Jungkook.

With the length of his hair, you’re left staring at his lips, pulled taut between his pearly white teeth. The word from before sits heavy in your chest, begs to drip from the tip of your tongue. But he’s moving too fast and too hard, scrambling your thoughts until all you can think about is the cock plunging into your heat. His name falls from your mouth like mindless blubber instead, arms thrashing as your second orgasm swallows you up. It sends you crashing, body spasming as the sheer euphoria waves over you slowly and then all at once.

“Perfect,” he grunts, leaning down to slot his mouth against yours, “my perfect girl.” Your cum makes the sound of his hips erotic, the loud squelching following your panting. Still sensitive from your high, your body unconsciously tightens around him, keeps his cock from fully leaving. It brings a soft whine out of Jungkook, one he tries to muffle against the side of your face.

“Inside,” you whimper, even though your body feels like jelly beneath him. “Cum inside, Kook, please,” you beg.

It only takes a few more thrusts into your leaking hole for him to finally reach paradise, hips stuttering when that first shot of pleasure hits him. “Fuck, fuck,” he growls, wildly snapping his hips into your achy cunt. You moan, feeling just about brainless at the overstimulation. His cum leaves you full, almost makes your belly bulge from it. When he’s done he doesn’t bother pulling away, simply slumping into your limp form. His cock, though quickly softening, serves as a plug for the cum threatening to spill out of you.

There’s a muted noise coming from the other room, the faint sound of the mail slipping through your letterbox, the quiet chattering of the street outside. And of course, the loud blaring of your laptop playing the Phineas and Ferb theme song. Jungkook registers it at about the same time as you, a soft chuckle leaving his lips.

He pushes off of you soon after, leaning on his palms over you. He’s got that molten look on his eyes, the heat of a thousand suns burning behind those irises as he looks at you. Like he can’t get enough, even though he’s just about taken everything there is to take. “Love you,” he murmurs quietly.

A drop of sweat rolls over his forehead, clinging to the end of his eyebrow. You reach up and brush it away, let your hand trail down his face to cup his cheek. Immediately he leans into the touch, eyes falling half shut. “Love you more,” you respond.

“Impossible,” he scoffs.

Soon after you’re both stumbling out of bed, clothes haphazardly shrugged back on as you drift through the living room. There’s a thin, hot pink package sitting at the door, just having slipped through the letterbox; the stark Sexuality Unleashed logo is printed on the visible side, so you have to wonder what Doyeon could have possibly ordered this time that could be so thin. The laptop is awkwardly sandwiched next to a throw pillow, barely open a crack. Jungkook retrieves it, sets it on his lap as you scamper over to the couch.

“More Phineas and Ferb?” he asks quietly. He hates it, you know he does. And still, he wants to watch it with you.

You nod. “Please.”

He isn’t so concerned with the plot as you, clicking some random episode to start. You snuggle into his side, quietly singing along to the opening. After a moment, Jungkook speaks again. “Phineas and Flirt?” he offers cheekily.

You roll your eyes. “That might’ve been your worst one yet,” you sigh, trying to drown out his indignant huff by focusing on the screen.

“I don’t exactly see you coming up with these,” he points out, obviously feeling wronged.

Without missing a beat you say, “Disney+ and bust.”

epilogue

commercial break one ; the resolution

Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

[nsfsprince]

An a/b/o idea thats taken over the brain that I wish to write:

Intruxietlogical A/B/O au that's set in a manor or smth?

Theres Alpha!Logan(cismale), head of the manor and a very rich yet young and respectable individual of the city. Hes like 6'4 and handsome as hell, and secretly knows it(due to Remus's persistent courting) but sees no point in personally flaunting it, letting Remus take the lead in that.

Then theres his eccentric Omega spouse, Remus(nonbinary leaning with he/him pronouns), the (in)famous artist of the city. Hes unusually tall for an Omega at 5'10, crude and unworried about fitting the 'normal' societal omega expectation despite also being born to a rich family. He courted Logan, persistantly, as he loved the fact that Logan treated him with the same respect as he would anyone else and never judged Remus for who he was, and the more Logan accepted the courting the more they fell in love before marrying and bonding at like. 23-25?

Well, Virgil is a 5'1 omega(transman with he/him pronouns), age 24. Hes a feisty little thing thats been surviving the streets for too long, he's parentless and, his high anxiety keeps him safer than most omegas on their own but no ones perfect- he ends up almost getting abducted by a sketchy Alpha when a Beta named Patton storms in and saves him.

That's how Patton, Logan's brother, takes him in to treat the sprained wrist he got from the encounter, and for Remus to set eyes on Virgil and immediately decide he wants to keep and court him, too.

I could ramble alot about the months it takes for remus to flirt and fluster and break Virgil out of his shy terrified shell(because hes gone from interacting with fellow street raccoons to very weathy and very Pretty nobility and its. A Lot.

I could ramble about the way both Remus and Logan coax Virgil into staying in their home for more and more ludicrously simple reasons, just to keep courting him, and how Virgil catches on, and flusteredly does nothing to stop it bc he's slowly falling in love too

But what I Really wanna ramble about, is their bedroom dynamics.

Content warning for under the cut: a/b/o dynamics, talk/descriptions of knotting, polyamourus relationships, kinks. Lots of kinks: oralfixation, dom/sub/switch dynamics, praise kink, overstim(lots of overstim), talk of double penatration, p in v sex, ect. Let me know if i missed anything!

MINORS DNI or you will be fully blocked from this blog and my main one.

Logan is a soft but firm dom, always in control and ready to take control. He has a bit of an oral fixation and loves sucking off his loves as often as he can, happy to sate his loves while getting them to soak themselves in fresh slick. He's easily comanding when needed but also enjoys that Remus is more than willing to take control on occasion(see: regularly). He just really really likes taking care of his loves however he can, and aftercare is super important especially after some of their more intense scenes

Remus is a bossy switch, who Loves riding Logan's cock till hes stuck on his knot, or getting fucked up against a wall till his mind turns to jelly. Really likes a bit of primal play, loves riling Logan up with praising how good Logan could breed him(even tho theyre all on birth control so it really is just for the scenes) if he just pins him down and takes. On the flip side, Re also loves pinning Virgil down and driving him crazy, too.

Virgil is a near complete submissive, he's eagar to give and take as ordered and melts at any praise given. Starting out he'd been touch straved beyond belief(which has since been remedied thoroughly) and thus ended up developing a habit of dropping into subspace the moment Logan and/or Remus cradle his neck with both hands. Hes a very affectionate sub who puts so much of his trust and control into Logan and Remus's hands, and both cherish it as Virgil literally never lets his guard down around anyone else.

So, my favorite thing about their dynamic is that Remus still has a decent sized cock despite being an omega, like is actually rather big for Virgil to take, the draw back is just that Remus cant, at least naturally, Knot Virgil like Logan can. (However, its like one of Remus's biggest fantasies to Knot Virgil, and Virgil is totally in the same boat and would be Very on board with it)

This lack of natural knot doesnt stop Remus of course, infact its encouraging because he has a nearly non-existant refractory period so, literally imagine:

Virgil on his back, Virgil's head and shoulders are cradled lovingly in Logan's lap as the alpha occassionally trades kisses with both of his gorgeous omegas. Virgil's legs spread and cunt gently held nice and open by Logan's gentle but firm hands as Remus repeatedly sinks his cock nice and deep into Virgil. Slick soaks Virge and Remus's thighs, his cunt, and Remus's cock.

Every thrust has Virgil whimpering and his legs twitching with the relentless feeling of the head of Remus's cock just barley rutting against his cervix on every other pass. Just the hot way Remus has Virgil pinned into a mating press and obviously working hard to make that position live up to its name, babbling at how good Virgil feels taking his cock like a good little omega, at how easy it is to breed Virgil over and over and over again.

Then Logan enacts this little idea hes been holding onto the moment Remus starts to get close(hes trained Remus well, having helped him train to stall his orgasms for longer and longer because Remus LOVES overstimmulation). He has Remus slow down for just a moment, causing both omegas to whine, before coating two fingers in plenty of slick and slowly pressing them in alongside Remus's cock.

Virgil is slowly losing his mind(as they find out in later sessions that he absolutely has a size kink, and would happily take both their cocks at once any time hes given the chance) at the width, his eyes rolling. Then Remus is told to start thrusting again until he comes, and to ignore Logan's two fingers outside of being careful.

Virgil and Remus are so keyed up that it only takes another minute or so for Remus to start cumming, following Logan's order of pressing all the way inside as deep as he can get, at which point is Logan's cue to start curling his fingers firmly deep inside of Virgils walls.

Immediately, Virgil starts whimpering loudly as he cums, his body reacting the way it would if he were being knotted by an alpha, cunt clenching tight and sucking Remus's cock deeper as his eyes squeeze closed and his jaw fall lax, overwhelmed as his body draws out his orgasm for as long as hes knotted.

Remus is put in a mind-melting world of pleasurable overstimmulation as hes just climaxed and Virgils cunt is milking it for all hes got and he cant even move or pull out now because hes 'locked' inside. His hips and legs are trembling and he's moaning loudly because it's so hot that hes basically getting to Knot Virgil and it feels so good.

Virgil's cunt won't let him go and wont stop pulsing around the head his oversensitive cock and he really cant be faulted for the way he loses control and just keeps orgasming, his lack of refractory period as a keyed up omega just letting him squirt more and more cum and slick deep into the omega under him.

Logan's gentle and soothing, cooing reassurances to his two loves as he helps them lose their minds & fulfil their fantasies. He even uses his free hand to stroke Virgils little cock slowly, drawing out shaking whines from both of them as it makes Virgil clench harder in intervals. Remus ends up hunched over Virgil, his face tucked into his fellow omega's neck to muffle his overstimulated whimpers.

Logan draws it out for a minute or two, just until pleasured and overwhelmed tears picks at their eyes and their soft begging whimpers and mewls fill the room before slowly releasing the hold, letting the string of tension snap and watching them unravel and relax, finishing their peaks.

Remus cant help the way he struggles to pull out, so oversensitive that his hips keep hitching back in place with the way Virgils body tries to keep him there, needing Logan to pull their hips apart to fully end the scene.

Logan strokes and comforts both exhausted omegas, now fully in his element, cooing soft reassurances to both, getting up to start a bath and carefully guiding them both in and cleaning them up. The sheets are changed and both are put in soft clothing and given juice and cuddles.

Remus would probably make a comment on asking drowsily just how Logan deals with being knotted to him for in upwards of 30 minutes if it feels like /That/ the whole time. Logan would probably just smile sweetly and press a sweet kiss to his lips and say "with experience of course, perhaps we can work on that too, if the both of you would be so inclined?"

Virgil shutters and whines, too tired to get worked up again, Remus in a similar boat but nodding drowsily anyway. Remus probably wakes up sore and gets worked up all over again at the memory of why his cock of all things is sore and sensetive.

Perhaps they do work on it, perhaps Remus is trained to a take it little longer each time, no where near half an hour for the longest time, but he gets pretty close and much better at holding from losing his mind.

Maybe then they explore what it feels like for Remus to be stuck on Logan's knot, while Virgil is stuck on Remus's 'knot' with the help of a toy. Maybe then they also explore working Virgil up to take both of their cocks, and see what happens what Logan's fingers curl just right to trigger that knotted feeling to have Virgil lose his goddamn mind impaled on both their cocks as they slowly thrust in and out despite his body thinking he's already been knotted and reacting as such.

Maybe they even explore working Virgil's other hole open, just enough to take Logan's knot, and give Remus free reign to fuck Virgil's soaking trembling cunt until they can coax Virgil's cunt into taking Remus's 'knot' as well

Idk man. Just. This whole dynamic has so many hot possibilities. 💕💕💕

[the-knife-consumer]

Hhhmg Villainous hcs!!

starting with Demencia bc i love her smmmm 🦎

Super online all the time. Leet speak. Emoticons. Rawrs and X3 s.

Beats the hell out of Flug on Smash Bros. Or any other video game. She mains Greninja khchkkhh

Feels lonely and doesn't know where to direct it or how to ease it so she tries as hard as she fucking can to have a crush on Black Hat.

cupioromantic, ace :))

100% a scalie

She/it

Was busted for petty theft, graffiti, and nearly mauling people when she was 19. After escaping prison with the blood of several guards on her hands, knowing that she could never live peacefully again and would be hunted for the rest of her life, Black Hat approached her with a job offer.

Hair is naturally a dark green. She dyes it neon, and it grows incredibly fast (if it was cut down to a pixie cut, she'd have it back to full length in about a week)

Her hair, even though it has no nerve endings, still causes her pain if its crushed/chopped off (what with it functioning as an extra limb)

Buff but not from lifting weights. She'll pick up 5.0.5. And tote him around. Take bear to go get ice cream 🥺 breaking out of straight jackets probably added to it as well.

GOES BONKERS OVER JET SET RADIO

Giant gir plushie. Insert your text here. (A TON of gir merch. Shirts, keychains, pins, etc. She has never watched iz)

Peeling apart those sour belt candies and putting them in a bowl filled with monster

Do not do this.

YEEPERS NOT EVEN TWO CHARACTERS IN THIS IS LONG

The rest under cut :3

Flug ✈️

Has absolutely lost his shit at Bh for tormenting 505 before. Busts into the office and makes bh remember what it was like to be in hell.

Struggles with being in the air after crashing as a pilot for a high class airline (had a passion for science, but it was interrupted by piloting) He was the only one who survived. Approached by Black Hat with a job offer shortly after.

Because of this, flying to missions puts him on edge and he's quicker to lose his temper. 5.0.5. Is good at calming him down most of the time

Despite his past he loves building model planes and still studies aviation.

Would draw what i think he looks like w/o his bag but. Eghh i'll do it later

Had a parakeet named Cloudy. Demencia ate it.

He/him

Bi

He has extremely strong prescription lenses in his goggles. Mans blind.

Lets 505 doodle little flowers and hearts on his bag 😌

Yk how in the shorts,, the device that makes the most horrifying thing you can imagine,, and all he could manage was an oozing sandwich. And how the device that makes the most important to them thing was bh?? Yeah he's not really afraid of him anymore outside of having his bones snapped. Completely desensitized to the paranormal bc of the chaos he's constantly exposed to.

Just chairs moving and knives flying out of the knife block and glasses shattering and he's just. "damn i guess the boss is angry again" one day brushing off everything is gonna get him killed ngxngx

Marie squid sisters his beloved

Black Hat 🎩

Incredibly weak by demon standards. Very weak

Smooth like smooth shark. If you see them have scales no they dont

Smells strongly of almonds (haha get it bc cyanide smell like almouhng)

Eye covered by monocle just doesn't work. Used to be helped by it, but over time they went completely blind in that one

Speaking of. HATES eye contact. Part of the reason they're constantly scaring the shit out of people is to make sure they won't stare at them.

Fucking refuses to be shorter than other people. Will wear heels if necessary. Will turn into giant horrifying mass if necessary. Just hates being short (even though they are reasonably tall) , especially compared to lowly clients.

Commonly refers to themself as 'we'

Exiled from hell for fucking too hard (KHXGKCHKC but no, they were exiled because they were considered a disgrace)

They/he/she

Was mean to 505 a few times. Flug's wrath shocked them so much that they never got they courage to do so again.

Honestly enjoys being out of hell (aside from dealing with idiots). Scamming people is fun

Girl help i cant fucking swim

Wears hats to cover up the fact that their horns are just. Nubs. Not even slightly intimidating

Has paw pads but not exactly??? They aren't soft they're more like sandpaper. Designed for climbing/tearing up stuff

Gets up later than everyone else because they're cold blooded. They need to be near a heater or in the sun for a bit before they can actually start their day.

Can barely change color. Stays in the range of deep grey/purple though

Weehee this is what happens when im bored

Hope u enjoyed my babbling session ❤️

[seancekitsch]

You Need Hands: Part of the Prize Buck Series

Warnings: smut, talking about abusive relationships, talking about drug use, unsafe bondage practices bc i am not a sex guru i am a writer of two flawed people, codependancy, praising

Klaus is surprised, to say the least when you come into the apartment raging, fingernails chewed off and eyes red as if you'd been crying on your walk home from work. Work was your only place, save for home, where you seemed truly happy. He notices your shaking and the barely contained rage behind the clench of your jaw.

“Hey! Hey, is everything alright?” he puts a hand out to stop you from pacing, and you turn on him, eyes glassy and red.

“Do you know what she said about us?”

What the fuck? Who would have said that? You talk to his siblings. Your boss. And. Oh. Okay, you talk to Gwen, your roommate from your University days that you recently gotten in touch with again. Klaus doesn't like her. It’s hard to get on Klaus’ bad side, but she seemed… pushy. Not pushy. What's the word he’s trying to use? Controlling? Scheming? Yeah, those are the ones. Accuracy cuts deeper, you always tell him. He pets your arm, feeble in trying to calm you down but after a few ragged open-mouthed breaths, you’re ready.

“She called us Sid and Nancy,” you continue, “She said we live in a sex den above a bodega slowly killing each other, if not outright doing it. She thinks you’re gonna get me high again. She basically met up with me up to judge me and tell me everything I’m doing wrong. I didn't even get to tell her about that paella we made last week for your whole family.”

“Oh, she’s kidding right? I’d make a terrible Nancy.” That makes you pause in your tracks, confusion lighting up your features.

“No- Klaus she thinks you’re Sid.”

“I’m not Sid.” He reaffirms, pulling you in and wrapping his arms around your frame. Noticing how the candlelight catches on your hair, making you look like a biblical angel, one of those terrifying fiery things, hard to look at but you’re all his. He knows how you feel right now, better than anyone. He’s used to being the one discounted and lectured. His own siblings, as much as he loves them dearly, only just started trusting him in the span of the past two years. It felt like something divine, that despite how mean and secluded you were at first, how you trusted him so deeply so quickly. He’d known you for almost a year, and in that year dragged you to another century, gotten you involved in a cult, exposed you to his family, ghosts, challenging and difficult situations other people could have easily cracked under without disease plaguing their mind. Klaus is capable of great cruelty and recklessness, he knows it. He knows you shouldn't trust someone who has seen and done the frankly fucked up shit he has, but you do. And he trusts you fully in turn, if not more. Even when you refused to be open with him, pushed him away; the days when you would have rather stuck pins in your hand than speak to him because he was loud and you were too weak to handle it.

He exhales a breath he didn't know he was holding when he feels your head dip and fall against his chest.

“Is she right?” your voice is far away, empty. Needing some empty comfort. “Are we killing each other? Do we suck?”

“Hey, c’mon, don't be upset,” he shushes you, “We’re good for each other. We have jobs! No relapses! Bet your ex could never say that.” He couldn't, your ex was part of the reason you were here, which Klaus wasn't exactly upset about because it meant he had you and no one else did, but you probably could have benefitted from years free from an active addiction that was more or less funded by the competitive nature of your work and home life.

“I’m not upset. I’m pissed.”

That solves it for Klaus. When you're pissed, you clam up. He doesn't want to emotionally lose you for the rest of the day, or worse, the whole weekend.

“We’re not killing each other,” he confirms, “Pretty sure you can't kill me anyway.”

You snort and swat at his ribs, but then your hand doesn't leave him after the hit, instead slinking from his side to his back, coming to rest on his shoulder blade. You're holding him, which means he hasn't lost you.

“Oh, wicked thing, I’ll show you how good I am for you.”

You sigh, and feeling the pricking of your nails on his back, he takes that as permission. His hand begins roaming your body, groping at your chest, squeezing at your ass as you grab onto him, holding him for stability as he keeps moving, his large hands making you moan.

“Klaus…” you trail off. What are you trying to say? What are you asking for? You don't know.

“How many days have you been clean?” He whispers against your skin.

“One hundred and ninety three.” You know it exactly.

“See? She’s wrong,” and he goes back to peppering your face with kisses as his hands work to pull your skirt out of the way. Its dirty the way he pulls your clothes out of the way to fondle at you, to rub against your cunt through your underwear, to pull that underwear aside and find you wet and waiting. His other arm wrapped around the small of your back, holding your rumpled skirt gathered in his hand.

“I’ll be real good for you,” he affirms, slipping a finger into you, and then another. You grip onto his shoulders now, enough to keep you standing when your legs want to crumble under his thrusting. He pushes in with ease, like you were made to take his fingers, your breath hitching and tiny whines falling from your lips. His forehead dips to press against yours, sweat beginning to form on his brow. Its dizzying, how deep his long fingers can be inside you, how full and whole you feel as he holds you against him, making you shake and moan as he props you up, letting you feel like a ragdoll at his mercy.

“Hey,” he nudges you with his nose, “Hey, Lover, look over there.”

He shifts his head to the left, and your head follows. You're face to face with the image of yourself in the cheap and grimy thrift shop mirror you had bought. You see how strong his lean muscles are, how they move against you, hold you close and safe.

“Look how fuckin’ good you look.” You nod, you have to agree, heavy bedroom eyes stare back at you, your lips parted almost pornographically. Is this how Klaus sees you all the time? He picks up the pace, eagerly moving his hips along with his hand, needing to feel some release and friction himself as he works you over, your voice raising an octave as he gets rougher, until your eyes close tightly; your body stiffens, shakes, and you can hear him praising you. You're doing so well, that's it, all for me, right on my hand, you're so sexy. Your voice comes out in a shudder. Trying to thank him as your muscles twitch and you look into his beautiful green eyes.

“No, no, no, shhhh,” he hushes you again, smoothing your hair down as he leads you to walk on wobbly legs over to the bed to sit, not bothering to fix your skirt. Your eyebrow quirks as he moves to remove his belt fully, not just unbuckle it to remove his pants.

But you wise up quickly, watching him grab your hands and start to wrap the belt around your wrists. You have bondage rope somewhere around here, but this is hot, and he told you to be quiet, so you don’t make a sound. He moves your hands at the wrist, checking for you to make sure the belt won't hurt you, then pushes you back onto the bed, staring at invisible patterns on the ceiling as you lift your hand for them, belted wrists landing at the other edge of the bed. You can feel him push your skirt up even more, then you feel his skin on yours, his bare thighs rubbing against the inside of yours, then the sensation of Klaus rubbing his cock against you. Fuck, you love his cock. You love him. He watches your expression, your gasps, your sighs from lips plumped by bruising, your eyes fluttering shut as he rubs against you. You're a fucking goddess. He doesn't deserve you, despite trying to carnally prove that he does. Youre so fucking good, you’ve helped better each other. Fuck what anyone says. He just hopes you believe it too.

“So fuckin’ good, Lover. Oh, I’m gonna worship this cunt,” he sighs, more to himself than you.

“Don’t make me wait, Klaus,” you command, but then whine as he enters you. Everything feels like so much, so much.

“Sensitive, Fraulein?”

“I can handle it.”

“Of course you can,” he agrees, setting his pace

He hikes one of your legs up onto his hip, then hikes his leg up onto the bed, getting a better angle to fuck you, but also to lean in and kiss you, his mustache brushing your chin, lips attaching themselves to the underside of your jaw as he kisses you fully, pressing his love into your skin.

He covers your body with his own, protective, possessive, and devoted; he fucks you through another high, making you scream into his mouth as he doesn’t slow his pace, once again shushing you and singing your praises. I love you, you look so good like this, let me live the rest of my life like this between your thighs. You want to let him take, and take, and take. Such a thoughtful, loving, loyal person. He gives. You want him to give.

“Klaus,” you sound breathless, “Klaus, come inside me, please.”

You beg, wanting him completely. He lifts your other leg, before climbing completely on the bed with you, his sweaty chest dropping against yours, palming at your breast as he buries his head into the crook of your neck, needing to feel the closeness of you as he comes.

He comes quietly, with a staggered gasp and your lips kissing his hair. One of his hands finds yours bound above your head, and grasps them both in his. He kisses your neck as he stills, body relaxing as he comes down.

You stay like that for almost a half hour before the phone on the wall rings and snaps you out of your loving haze.

[fandom-will-be-my-fall]

Spill your heart out about Walter.

Okay so I basically got this question in what, January?? but I’m answering it now since I just rewatched the movie and have inspiration, sorry for the late reply Anon

Okay so, to start off this post with some keyboard smashing because that my primary go-to for expressing my emotions

sgklhfsgjksdlgdghkjlgjhOHUFLUSKHDGSLIDRGKJGKFSDHGlhjglksdhkglshglllllfa. knjcthxiudhusmnvsoidhéytbvonjyxclkkvbr. haeylicfvshdkgikc

HANDSOME BOY. HANDSOME. ‘NUFF SAID.

I could legit stare all day at his beautiful face… look at him. Enchanting sky blue eyes… fluffy, wavy brown hair, cute round cheeks, lovely smile… those hidden freckles that you can hardly spot and only in certain screenshots but nevertheless they’re there to raise the cuteness factor… ALSO HIS LASHES. MAYBE IT’S NATURAL?? MAYBE IT’S MAYBELLINE?? WE SHALL NEVER KNOW

Here you may be able to spot the freckles if you squint hard enough. I have 77 screenshots but this is the best example I could find.

Secondly… well, he’s a sticc. A short sticc at that (though still slightly taller than me bc I’m smol), but a sticc regardless! And that seems to be the most attractive cartoon body type for me. Don’t judge me, I just have a thing for twinks, I’m… twinksexual or whatever.

Look at him! He would fit through my doorcrack.

(Maaaybe the reason for me liking sticcs so much is partially the fact that I like the idea of a boyfriend I can protect and support, physically and emotionally. I’m mad at the universe for not letting me scoop him up in my arms bridal style and smooch the HECK outta him.)

I’ve encountered a few posts that claimed he’s got cake but, come on. That concept has canonically been proven to be false, even by Lance. This man is flat and you can pry this opinion off my cold, dead hands.

Speaking of hands! I like his big ol hands. Nice shape. They look soft. I wanna hold them.

According to a DVD commentary, and the visual facts, he has no shoulders whatsoever. Back in Venice Killian was able to restrain him effortlessly with only one foot on his chest, even as he kept struggling ans squirming and generally put in as much effort as he possibly could. Before then, he claimed the database was the first thing he has ever caught in his life.

Conclusion, our boi’s very much NOT athletic. Which makes sense for a scientist, braining all day and stuff, and because he probably barely even eats, or sleeps which are by the way both pretty concerning implications but anyway.

STOP BEATING UP THIS POOR FRAGILE LAD FOR GOD’S SAKE. Makes me want to protect him even more. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but you get what I mean.

Now, on to the actual reason I’m so head over heels for him, a.k.a his personality.

He is one of the sweetest, kindest, purest boy characters I have ever seen in fiction, if not THE number one himself. (All my other cinnamon roll crushes are, or have been a villain at some point and WILL resort to violence if provoked.) Look at him, his pacifism… is unbreakable. He’s dead set on making the world a better place, by peaceful ways, and helping humanity. If that’s not a quality to be cherished then IDK what is.

And he’s just such a refreshing character. He likes pink, K-dramas, glitter, kittens, things that aren’t traditionally “masculine” (but is never made fun of those things in particular in the movie) and I love that. Nothing’s sexier than a man who’s, despite society’s shitty standards, openly and unashamedly himself!

His femininity is, if anything, just another turn-on. (This didn’t intend to sound sexual… but oh well.) I love his little hand gestures and mannerisms, dorky ramblings, the way he says “yep” popping the “p” at the end, all the small yet significant traits that were incorporated into his character. Bless you, SiD creators, bless you.

Have I said that he’s a genius?? Which is pretty obvious but c’mon, he graduated at 15!! He can modify human genes!! He successfully turned a man into a pigeon on the first try!! (The serum wasn’t the first prototype but we can assume he didn’t experiment on living humans with the previous ones.) And he’s still just 20!! Like what is that if not hella fucking impressive???!??

His inventions, to the untrained eye, may seem “stupid” or “childish” but alas! The observer couldn’t be more wrong! Because despite the odd designs and themes they’re all highly effective, as we have witnessed in the battle against Killian. And he is extremely creative for coming up with such ideas! Told you he’s brilliant!!

Which makes me all the sadder about how much they underappreciated him at the agency. In his words, nobody ever listened to him, or gave him a chance. They just left him and his “weird” ideas next to the men’s bathroom and called it a day. How could they be so blind? Didn’t they see the potential in his inventions? Oh well. Maybe I’m just being a smartass bc I have more knowledge, living outside that universe. But I’m totally right.

And I was honestly ready to throw hands with Lance for hurting the boi even further. (I’d stand no chance whatsoever, but still.)

Oh no baby please don’t cry.

He did cry in that scene though… you could see a tear rolling down his cheek and if it wasn’t for the machine beeping… He did have a pretty rough day afterall. But HEY, if we dwell on it too much the scene loses its comedic effect!! A guy gets sad over a stupid soap opera, har har har!! Now let’s move on, keep it fast and snappy for the kids, don’t let them overthink it!! Can’t have any emotional breakdowns onscreen. Keep it lighthearted y’know. Then let’s kill a random side character and have our dear protagonist almost die twice.

(Well jokes on you Blue Sky! I’m no kid, but a devoted fangirl who can and will overthink any material of my fictional faves at any given opportunity.)

You know what else I love about him though?? His love for animals!! And pigeons, especially Lovey!! He loves her so much, gives her gluten free breadcrumbs, nuzzles her, the first thing he does when he finds out Lance can talk to the pigeons is ask if she loves him too!! Like… That’s so pure and wholesome.

This here. THIS RIGHT HERE. BROTP forever.

(Not gonna lie, I used to be crazy for pigeons for like, an entire year or something. Not as in looking up all the facts there are about pigeons as I do nowadays with cartoons, but I’d feed them regularly and write my little observations on their behaviors. Did you know they sometimes scratch their neck with their leggies like dogs do?)

I think I’ve summed up mostly everything I love about this nerd. Oh wait, almost forgot the sass!! I love how sassy and smug he can be sometimes, in like, a really harmless way but it’s still a very nice characteristic.

Since I’ve ran out of coherent things to say, here’s an incomplete list of things I want to do to Walter Beckett. Put at the end of this post so those of you who were only here for the analysis part and not the selfshippy gushing don’t have to read further:

kiss he

like seriously

just kiss he a whole lot

cover his whole face in kisses

one kiss for each of his freckles. a finishing kiss onto the tip of his nose. then repeat the cycle

hug him. hug him like the world is ending. hug him so tight he can barely breathe

then ofc let go and apologize bc I would never hurt him on purpose

cuddle him

hold him close, let him lay his head on my chest

run my fingers through his hair

listen to his breathing

discover that he’s fallen asleep on me and smile fondly, then soon drift off to sleep myself so we can wake up entangled in eachother the next morning

fuck he

pin him to a wall and snog he

make him go cherry red

fluster he

compliment him. praise him. appreciate him. he’s a prince, a hero, an angel, a wonderful human being and he needs to know this

feed pigeons together

listen to his scientific ramblings and bird facts

write him love letters and give them to him. maybe read it aloud myself if I’m feeling brave so I can see his reaction in real time

serenade he

be the love of his life, and have him be mine

just… soft things, man

cook something for this malnourished sticc

make him small handmade gifts

they’re nothing like his gadgets but I tried

draw he

have him be my muse in general

not like he isn’t now but it would be lovely if he was real too

carry him bridal style

be the feral cryptid that lurks in his house when he isn’t around

sing along to cheesy pop-song together really badly

watch cheesy rom coms

flirt with eachother clumsily until we’re both laughing at our awkwardness

or, alternatively, shower him with compliments until he literally cannot handle it

have sleepovers together

give him hand kisses

be of emotional support

[kiwisfics]

Dazai and Chuuya as Vampires

A/N - This is just stupid self indulgent garbage bc I’m trash for vampires. I did Fyodor and some for Fukuzawa but I didn’t like them so I omitted them lol I honestly didn’t want to post any of these, but I spent time writing them so I might as well post

General stuff

- Only Purebloods can turn others  - "Siring," "sirred," "sir," etc refer to who they've turned.  - To turn someone into a vampire, they need to ingest the blood of a Pureblood.  - Demi-vampires are those who are turned by another vampire, and Halfblood vampires are born to a human and vampire pair.  - Vampires are more susceptible to being burned by the sun, but there's no real risk of them dying to it.  - To kill a Pureblood, they *must* be turned to ash. Demi-vampires are the basis for the running water and wooden stake methods of killing. Halfbloods can be killed in almost any way a human can be, albeit, with much more difficulty.  - The more attached they become to a human, the more they crave their blood specifically.  - Pureblood's venom is exponentially stronger than that of both Demi-Vampires and Halfbloods. It numbs the wound the instant it reaches the bloodstream, and eventually sends whoever they're biting into a haze.  - (It's enjoyable, though.)  - Purebloods and a majority of Halfbloods can shapeshift.  - Halfbloods require the least amount of blood of the three types, while Purebloods need the most.

Dazai

 - Definitely a Pureblood. Don’t ask why, he just gives me those vibes  - He didn’t value human life in the slightest while in the Port Mafia, frequently draining whoever became his meal.  - While in the mafia he sirred Akutagawa.  - His gained respect for Oda (a human) is what eventually lead to a change in his opinions on humans. His change in view came well before he left the mafia, however.  - After joining the ADA he sirred Atsushi.  - Despite having a higher opinion on humans than he used to, he still frequently drinks from humans, though he never drains them. With an s/o  - He adamantly refuses to drink from you, but no one - including you - would realize that he was intentionally avoiding consuming your blood, considering he frequently jokes about consuming your blood.  - When he does eventually drink from you, its either completely spontaneous, or meticulously planned out, depending on what leads up to it.  - If you insists that he bite you upon realizing that hes avoiding doing so, then it will be well planned out and he'll be almost completely in control.  - If he just happens to reach his limit, then he's all heavy breaths and growls as he pins you to the wall, claws digging into your hips and pricking your skin as he pants against your neck.    - He's obviously trying to hold back, but if he's reached this point, there’s little point in trying to stop him.  - Begging him not to hurt you might give you an opening to push him off, but at the risk of absolutely destroying him.  - He'll never be able to touch you without wondering if you're scared of him again.  - He sinks his fangs in with enough force that both his fangs and normal teeth break skin, but the venom numbs the pain and makes you lethargic.  - There's a 50/50 chance that he'll pull himself off of you before you lose too much blood, or you end up unconscious.  - Either way, he won't cause any permanent damage.  - Also, either way, he's going to pull away completely after losing control around you.  - Just hit him upside the head metaphorically and beat it into him that the only reason he lost control was because he was resisting his nature (be sure to include the fact that his nature doesn't bother you at all, and make clear you love him no matter what he is.)  - Honestly, you may have been the one covered in blood afterwards, but he definitely needs the most comfort.  

Chuuya

 - Demi-vampire.  - He was turned by Mori after joining the Port Mafia.  - He doesn't see humans as any less than vampires for the most part, but he absolutely will not drink from animals.  - He has taste.  - That simple fact and the fact that he isn't fond of draining people means he ends up drinking from a large number of people monthly, rather than, say, the *three* that Dazai averages.  - Pretty much has adopted Akutagawa and if someone doesn’t know that Chuuya's a demi-vampire, they might assume that he sirred Akutagawa. With an S/O  - He has no problem drinking from his s/o to be completely honest.  - The only exception is if you don’t want him biting you.  - It doesn't really bother him if you set that line, either.  - He's made due with others up until now, there’s no reason he can't continue, he has plenty of self control, too.  - So what if you smell divine?  - So what if hes never wanted to sink his teeth into someone more?  - Denying a pureblood is dangerous, but denying a Demi is much more so, because they're not nearly as well-controlled as those that sir them.  - Chuuya learns first hand that its not as okay as he thought the first time he has to pull himself away during a kiss to stop himself from trailing his lips down your neck and embedding his fangs in the vulnerable skin above your jugular vein.  - His eyes are blood red and his fingers are leaving dents in the wall aside your head.  - He won't do it though.  - He's still got enough presence of mind to force himself to walk away.  - He'll start avoiding you after that, to be absolutely certain that he doesn’t lose control.  - Really, at this point, it becomes evident that he won't be able to be around you without endangering you.  - So it comes down to whether you let him bite you or not.  - If you do he makes a big deal of it, wining and dining you to the best of his ability (his fangs are digging into his bottom lip all night, fingers gripping the table to keep himself back from you.)  - He's not vicious when he bites you, though.  - He's almost frighteningly calm, compared to his previous actions, breaking skin with a bite that's almost painless.  - He rarely leaves more than pinpricks in your skin.  - Unless, of course, you ask for otherwise.

[roominthecastle]

I’m not the original anon but what do you mean by twisted interpretation? 👀 (Genuinely curious as to anything you have to say—esp if its about lizzington😍)

Thank you, anon. any q asked in good faith is welcome in my inbox. The twistiness (for me, I don’t wish to speak on anybody else’s behalf here) predominantly flows from the facts that

Red stole her father’s identity and pretends to be him to this day

it’s still unclear what kind of intimate relationship he had with her mother

he feels a lot of guilt over events in the past that led to Liz losing both her parents, and, on top of that guilt, there’s also a steely sense of duty driving him to try and compensate for this loss (compensation that he often equates w/ money)

All of these (understandably) feed readings on the character that label him more of a parental presence in Liz’s life, and in a desperate attempt to keep him around, Liz also tried to designate him as such at the end of S6 to invoke a sense of obligation.

But this is only one side of the coin, a side that puts emphasis on the past and how that past should determine what role Red is allowed to play in her life in the present and the future. This parental reading, while not without merit, is not particularly complicated or gripping (this is probably why you see so little fanwork generated about it compared to stuff accumulated by the Lizzington side). It’s just.. is. It’s also incomplete but it gets much more interesting and way more complicated once we mix in the flipside of those three points above, which are also present in canon:

Red stole her father’s identity but not because he wanted to step into the father’s role in her life (that role was Sam’s). They never even met face to face until she was already an adult, so it’s more than reasonable to assume that the feelings Red’s developed for the adult woman he’s had meaningful, close interactions with are different from those he felt when she was an abstract idea of “that child I saved 30 years ago”. Feelings be like that naturally – they don’t care about obstacles or inconveniences. They develop anyway, which makes for a great story.

Whatever relationship Red had with her mother (and there is some interference here as the two are said to be quite similar to each other), Liz is not a placeholder. This is made esp clear in “Cape May” where Red talks about both Liz & Agnes and Katarina & Liz. The difference in how he talks about them is significant: “There was a woman I loved. She was my life, my heart, and she died. She left behind a little girl, one last precious piece of herself.” vs “There was a woman and her child. Both were doomed, both would die. I chose [to save] the child.” If I put this in front of an average person and asked them to pick which describes the woman the speaker is likely in love with, I bet they would go for the first one. I would, too. And that’s Liz.

Despite the guilt and sense of duty, Red has consistently resisted the father label. He let it fly in S5 bc circumstances forced his hand and it was the only way to buy time to find the missing skeleton - proof that he was not Reddington, proof he desperately wanted to keep hidden. Then, when Liz became desperate to keep him in her life and tried to pin “father” on him (desperation seems to drive both these characters to settle for F/D, it seems), we once again got to see that trademark twitch under Red’s eye, a telltale sign of discomfort and disapproval. One likely reason for him to reject this role now that Liz is the one offering, fully aware that he is an impostor, is that he’s developed feelings which are incompatible with this role, so it would be yet another lie he would be living with her, which is the opposite of what he wants despite being secretive.

And all this is still just scratching the surface. Red/Liz is one of the most psychologically, emotionally complex dynamics you can witness on TV today. It’s fascinating and it grates me beyond belief whenever someone tries to reduce it to anything less than that.

[ofstvtches]

ROCKY LYNCH,  MASCULINE NB,  HE/HIM & THEY/THEM.  —  looks  like  SAMHAIN SKELLINGTON is  attending  AURORIA  UNIVERSITY  in  auradon.  they're  the  TWENTY  year  old  child  of  JACK & SALLY SKELLINGTON,  which  means  they're  from  THE ISLE.  heard  they're  NURTURING  &  GENTLEMANLY,  but  can  also  be  INFLEXIBLE  &  SELF-PITYING  ;  we  all  have  our  bad  days.  people  normally  associate  them  with  SEWING NEEDLES REPAIRING A BROKEN DOLL , A BAG FULL OF BANDAGES, TRYING SO HARD TO BE TOUGH WHEN YOU’RE SOFT , SOFT HAIR HELD BACK WITH A BAT-SHAPED PIN.

                    ❛  when you saw that little girl , and she was in the sandbox                            and she was crying , and you gave her your toy truck and                            I told you we couldn’t afford to get another one. you said ,                          ‘ she should have it because she’s sad. she’s sad , mommy. ’ ❜                            playlist. pinterest. to listen as you read.

lol u guessed it it’s me , again , by unpopular demand - i am so sorry. third muse already bc i can’t keep myself away from playing absolute CINNAMON ROLLS so that’s what u can expect from sam w/ a pumpkin spice twist. bc nightmare is my absolute favorite movie and ... halloween, motherfuckers. so as usual this will PROBABLY end up long bc i love writing sam so much so yeah , more below ! 

HISTORY 

So as we know , Jack & Sally were sent to the Isle w/ the rest of Halloweentown for trying to steal Christmas ! And unlike Christmas , Samhain was not born in Halloweentown. In fact , he wasn’t even born - he was made. 

Magic wasn’t a huge thing on the Isle - but a resource of science was Dr. Finkelstein , and despite the limited resources and technology on the Isle , the couple begged the mad scientist to create another child for them. And from Sally , it took a lot of convincing , but Jack was able to talk him into it. 

It took even more of an effort to pull off , again considering the state of the Isle. But a good few months into the project and Jack & Sally were greeted with the cries of a tiny ragdoll baby boy. Keeping up with the holiday themed names , he was named Samhain - Sam for short. 

He grew with multiple touch-ups from the doctor to simulate an actual boy growing up - every year , a check-up making him taller , stronger , etc. And in that process he started to look more and more like his mother , with her big eyes and stitched smile and patchwork clothes. But he grew up loved by his brother & parents - though it never quelled the fact he always wanted... more.

He was loved , he was coddled , and as sheltered as a child could be on the Isle. So , much like his mother , he took a habit of sneaking out frequently and trying to fit in with the other Isle kids , even though he knew he didn’t. 

He just wanted to fit in. That was it. And it started off with him wearing large hoods and heavy clothes to hide the stitches on his body as well as masks to cover facial stitches. And while some other Isle kids found him odd and sticking out like a sore thumb , some found him cool. Some found him interesting. But nobody really knew what he was hiding - and it added mystery to someone so NICE , because Sam’s overall sweetness could rival that if sugar’s. 

Curiosity only reached dangerous points though when Sam snuck out on night to camp out with friends - and when everyone else was asleep , one removed his mask , and of COURSE did Samhain immediately wake up. He didn’t stay to see the reaction of the other when revealing his stitches , too afraid that he’d be seen as scary or repulsive for what he was. And he ran. He ran back home , locking himself in his room , and those friends he routinely hung out with . . . well , he didn’t talk to them much after that. Because what if they knew , now ?? What would they think ??

Villain & Auradon kids coming together was a new chance for Sam to try and fit in - be more in his element. He was immediately acquainted with a magic-practicing individual ( could be an AK or a VK - this’ll be a wc ) who struck a deal with him to offer him glamours so he could look less scary. Of course , these glamours would have to be applied and would wear off until the next application , but it’d make him feel more comfortable - even though he WOULD technically be hiding who he is.

While Christmas , the elder sibling , would be sticking around in Auradon Prep , Samhain would prefer to move immediately to Auroria University to try and figure out who exactly he wanted to be , and how he could do that. Currently he’s majoring in Nursing , given he’s always had a rather NURTURING and charitable nature - never turning down someone else’s request to help.

CHARACTER & FACTS 

So lemme get this one thing out of the way bc if I don’t I’ll be itching about it - but all my resources for ( the love of my life ) Rocky were made by me , and while they’re all from multiple eras from both R5 & TDE , I imagine Sam to resemble how Rocky looks around the post-Louder , Heart Made Up On You & Sometime Last Night eras ( basically from like 2013-2015 ). Here , here , & here for some references. I’m nOT DONE GIFFING THOUGH bc frankly I find giffing him therapeutic.

Now I don’t have a drawn reference or anything for this next part so we’re gonna have to use our imagination here but unglamoured , Sam basically looks like his mom in terms of the fact he’s a little ragdoll baby. Putting on a glamour doesn’t change his appearance much save for the fact the stitches disappear and he looks more human. 

The glamour is an enchanted bat charm he wears around his neck that can also be used as a hairtie. And it has to be refreshed every so often , so he has to keep going back to whoever provided him with it so it doesn’t lose its effect.

He still has a backup mask just in case , and he’s been practicing with makeup if need be.

Personality-wise , the best one can describe Sam as is sweet and polite. I included tht Stranger Things quote at the beginning 4 a rEASON bc he’s honestly such a sweet kid and will give anything to anyone.

And also bc I imagine Sally as Joyce mom-wise so yEAH bt I digress.

He knows his manners and treats everyone with the UTMOST amount of respect , which makes it extremely easy to get along with him . He’s also maybe a tad bit too giving for his own good , since it’s incredibly easy to use that to one’s advantage and he’s so inclined to believe people have the best intentions. An optimist , even if it’s to a fault. And then when he gets hurt he just sits to the side feeling sorry for himself like “ :’’’(. ”

Now when I say he’s inflexible , I mean that Sam is a very ORGANIZED person who likes things to be done a certain way - like , he can never do anything without a plan , and if even something slightly goes out of what the plan pertains of , he panics. He’s a goody-goody and he’s afraid to break the rules , which is why he’s still hesitant to even do things with the friends who are more “ bad ” than he is.

Everything has to be done BY THE BOOK and if it isn’t then something is bound to go wrong and Sam’s too worried about that happening.

He’s also incredibly insecure about his appearance but I think I’ve hammered in that fact enOUGH ALREADY

But if he takes his glamour off in front u that’s like. A Major sign of trust. So beware.

Again as I mentioned he tries to hang out with kids with the lesser reputations because :

1.) He wants to give them a chance

2.) He wants to make sure they have a friend to look after them

and 3.) He’s so used to trying to fit in with the other Isle kids that he’s trying to be ‘bad’ himself but it never works out bc he’s so sweet and he can dress in skinny jeans and leather and shit as much as he wants but at the end of the day he’s still Sweet Lil’ Samhain. 

One thing he’s always had a fascination with would be angels - he’s always believed in them , always though he’s had his own guardian angel watching over him somewhere , he’s always loved the idea of them. He has lots of angel decorations around his dorm as well as ornaments and stuff for the holidays. It’s also pure irony that he just so happens to be just as angelic in nature.

He’s also a big holiday person like the rest of his family and loves helping to decorate for events and stuff !!

One of his greatest talents is his ability to play both the piano & violin , and he’ll often do that if there’s a piano in common areas or so on. He’s also a talented singer , but he’s so used to putting that to the side , making him lack confidence in his voice.

i v much encourage u to listen to the song i linked i find his voice so....soothing.

Like his mom he’s also very good at cooking , sewing , etc. !! Often has to stitch himself back together if he gets hurt - you know , Sally style. 

More basic facts are that his final height clocks in at 6′4 , he’s homoromantic homosexual , and identifies as masculine non-binary who doesn’t really care how you address him. He’s very chill. And sometimes he has to walk with a cane of sorts if his stitches are loose or if his legs are feeling especially weak.

but yeah that’s it on that end !!!

WANTED CONNECTIONS

So obviously - the person who provided him with the glamour. Only requirement is that ur character’s good at magic or something of that sort.

AND ALSO - I’d love the person who initially removed his mask !! Sam didn’t stick around to see them react to how he truly looked , so it’s all up to you on how this character feels. But he’s avoided them since that scenario.

Also , his group of friends around the time that scenario happened on the Isle. Maybe they’re a little more rough around the edges than him , but this group was always tight-knit. And then Sam lightning mcghosted bc he wasn’t sure if now they knew what he really was.

Ppl who think his whole sweet thing is fAKE bc we know it isn’t but it’s so easy to THINK it is.

Also would love some folks he routinely cares for maybe in the aspect of like. Bein their shoulder to cry on. Patching up a wound. Just being There for them. 

Folks who in general just wanna know more abt him bc he is kind of a mystery !!

Would lOVE sb who his glamour wears off in front of and he begs them to keep his secret but instead they want him to try n be more comfortable w/ himself and who he is. Bc he’s a cute ragdoll let’s b honest he just. Doesn’t see himself that way. 

Ppl who Sam crushed on at the Isle and deffo broke his heart bc life just b like that sometimes 

Also present day folks who r just ready to break his heart bc again thats so easy to do

also once more i’m open 2 ANYTHINNNNNNG sam is my Baby(tm) and i’d lov any plots thrown his way !! will probs make another wc page for him like i’ve done w/ luke and am in the process of doing w/ trixie !!

[ryodan]

SasuNaru and the pin hole

(semi anti ending but not tagged as such as its mainly pro, so beware..vv semi tho)

@sasuke-prevails

Okay, so I’d reblog your post with a reply but my computer always freezes up when I do that and try to add pictures and I can barely use the tumblr app as it is so gaaaah. Plus, I’ve always wanted to make this post debunking everything SNS claim anyways. So here you go. sorry about the wait, i was so lazy..sorry about some shakey images i have GAD

First off, I’d like to say that when I say I am a Naruto fan, I don’t mean the character. I mean, don’t get me wrong I love Naruto too, but I am referring  to the series. I genuinely love this series despite all of it’s inconsistencies, I am late on the band wagon but I prefer that since it allows me to think objectively.  SNS tends to view the series with what I like to call pin hole vision where the entire series is naruto  x sasuke, they are the center bond because they represent everything the series itself stands for. They are not together all the time, they haven’t had the healthiest relationship but they’re the centre  bond because as proven by the first and final battles in the VOE, both at the end of part 1 and part 2 respectively it’s a ‘it boils down to this’ type of thing. However, when I say I am anti romantic SNS it does not mean I am anti their friendship. Do I think its unhealthy? Some aspects of it, yes. Problematic, yes tbh.

These are good examples  I think. Narutos worst fears early shippuuden were disappointing his comrades, and this. Why is is problematic on Narutos side? I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it

I’d like to mention what naruto as a series stands for, and always consistently stood for.

‘Nande?’

‘Onagi dakara’

‘why?’

‘because we are the same.’

-Narutos first bond, Iruka

‘Konoha o mamoroto tsuyui ishi’

‘strong will to protect the hidden leaf village.’

-Hiruzen

‘sato wa nanda?’

‘what is a village?’

-sasuke, ill get to it

‘Kono hi no ishi mote oru kagiri kono sato no mono wa subete kazoku sono mono nanja’

‘as long as one has this will of fire everyone in this village is family.’

‘Iruka sensei? Nande hito wa hito no tameni inochi o kake- ah fuck this translation takes too long im sorry omg

‘Iruka sensei why do people risk their lives for other people?’

‘When one person dies, their past , their present and their future disappears along with them----those people who die have dreams and ambitions, but everyone else has something just as important. Parents, siblings, friends, lovers..those who are dear to them. They trust each other and help each other—that string gets which connects those people gets stronger and thicker by time. It’s impossible to explain why, those who hold those strings just do it, because it’s important to them.’

‘yeah. Somehow it’s clear even to me.’

-Iruka and Naruto when Hiruzen died protecting the village

‘When someone has something they want to protect, their true power comes along’

-Haku

It’s because we help out when they’re in trouble that we can count on them to come running when we need it.

-Shikamaru, about Suna

‘If comrades that you trust gather around you, hope can take physical form and become visible. That`s what I believe...’

-kakashi, to obito

I won't allow my comrades to die. I'll protect you with my life. Trust me.

-kakashi

The next generation will always surpass the previous one. It's one of the never-ending cycles in life.

-kakashi

If you don't share someone's pain. You can never understand them.

-Pain

‘A long cycle of hatred humans have come to call history’

Just by living, people hurt others without even realizing it. So long as humanity exists, hate will also exist. There is no peace in this cursed world. War is just a crime paid for by the pain of the defeated...

-pain

Now there's something I understand a little better. Hate, sadness, even joy. To be able to share it with another person... Naruto Uzumaki. From fighting him I learned that. He knew pain like I did and then he taught me that you can change your path. I wish that one day I can be needed by someone. Not as a frightening weapon... But as the sand's Kazekage.

-Gara

  People's lives don't end when they die. It ends when they lose faith.

-itachi

‘ill never let my comrades die, those words and the conviction behind them are not lies, because neji was able to store those words in his heart. Brother Neji died! It’s not just you Naruto, we all hold those words and feelings in our heart.That is what binds our lives together and makes us comrades. If we all give up those thoughts and feelings Nejis final act would have been for nothing. And that is when your comrades truly die.’

-Hinata

The pain of being alone is completely out of this world, isn't it? I don't know why, but I understand your feelings so much, it actually hurts.

-Naruto

That void is something that everyone helps you fill. Just because you face adversity and hardships, is no reason to give up on this world. A person willing to throw away all those memories... of their friends and comrades, will never find peace of mind. Resorting to something like that isn't going to bury that hole. If you persevere and endure, someone will be there to support you!

-Kakashi, to obito

 I love sasuke. I love all of his bonds, and despite the shit he dealt with in the series he really does represent the message of the series really well…an atypical antagonist, an incredibly well written character who fills not only his shoes in the story, but the shoes of many other characters.

You say Sasuke offered his food to Naruto because he cares about him and I agree, empathy stems from care. But going by your argument.

Despite this

He did wait for her to wake up, also risking elimination and a halting of his revenge plans.

It’s important noting that before any of this, their goals were very self centered and none of them were playing by teamwork..except sasuke, who boasted that he was better than them to Kakashi, but was still the only one who linked them together, by feeding naruto and by saying the whole ‘we are a 3 man cell aren’t we?’

That’s another thing I love about this guy, he really brings people together despite the fact that does not talk for 98% of the series. Taka developed because of him and so did 7.

A constantly relevant theme.

the first mission bought light to what their relationships would be like very early on, and also imprints these guys as personal bonds based on friendship and affection that sasuke shares, a feat that no one else in the series was able to do aside from his family.

From the tree climbing exercise that combined their rivalry and their friendship to this moment that made a grown ass man cry

 ENCOUNTER WITH FRIENDS WHO CAN EASE HIM FROM LONELINESS!!

【仲間】 「それまで恋や友情に見向きもしなかったサスケは、ナルトやサクラと出会い、少しずつではあるが、仲間を受 け 入れ始める。サスケにとってナルトは、いつの間にか互いの能力を高め合う良きライバルとなり、 また大蛇丸の 邪悪な呪印にのみ込まれんとするその心を、サクラに救われたことも．．．  」

↳ 【COMPANIONS】 Though until then he had taken no notice of either love or friendship, after meeting with Naruto and Sakura Sasuke begins to accept them as nakama, even if only little by little. In Sasuke’s eyes, before he even noticed it, he and Naruto became mutual good rivals capable of boosting up each other’s skills - and also, when his heart was about to be swallowed by Orochimaru’s wicked cursed seal again, he was rescued by Sakura…

‘as they go on countless missions together, he sees her strengths and weaknesses and views her as someone he needs to protect’

「呪印の影響で暴走するサスケを身を挺して鎮めるサクラ。サクラのサスケを想う心が、邪な力を 包 み込む。」  

↳ Sakura willingly and bravely calms the rampaging Sasuke under the influence of the cursed seal. Sakura’s heart, thinking of Sasuke, devours the wicked power.

 For Naruto who was considered a failure, Sasuke was more than an annoying guy who got the best grades: he was also the rival that won Sakura’s heart, for whom Naruto is in love …! That’s why he always gets annoyed with Sasuke

Sasuke, who only had power for revenge, becomes stronger because of his companions. His true place would have been a future among them.

Growing distant, towards darkness. The one to appear before him as he began leave was Sakura. To the back of a Sasuke that tried to avert from what was being left behind, Sakura desperately conveys her feelings. Bright and earnest feelings - feelings that did not want to lose Sasuke. The one who filled his lonely existence with the emotion called love was Sakura. But, as expected, Sasuke cannot respond to those feelings. Sasuke was only able to leave a single word of thanks as word of parting. 

Friendship and love, a future filled with warmth. But as long as he is there, he cannot make his dream come true. This is why he throws away a future with his friends. To make dreams of revenge a reality…

As is confirmed by the databook.

Sasuke risked his life for them both, and he would have done it again no thinking what so ever, partly because he is a selfless person and also because they already imprinted on his mind. Sasukes relationship with Naruto is given a rivalry mixed with friendship context early on and my friend who had 0 to do with naruto burrowed volume one from me and in school while she was reading asked me if sasuke and sakura end up together, because authorial context is clear

In fact this scene builds up a very good argument I have for this ship that I will get to, where we first learn of his entire stance in the story and sakura is like? Mind you, this was at a time before sasuke ever spoke about these things to anyone…he made me cry is not something he ever told anyone other than sakura. She was intuitive to he him, even during the war when she had a feeling he’d start shit up early on.

You could argue he is blushing bc he is embarrassed… but he has had girls thirsting after him since he was fresh out the womb. ‘he came off stand offish’ well, yes naturally when a person is suffering from trauma and survivors guilt they tend to isolate themselves and become reclusive and irritable. Now, add the fact that the trauma happened at such a young age and you have a sasuke. But he still, took out the time to say he’s emo (a joke ofc)

The only ‘romantic context’ ever given to Naruto and Sasuke was the ‘accidental kiss’ which ended up like this

Over the course of the series we see Sasukes attachment to team 7, in the same context given before. Best friend and rival, girl he feels protective affection for.

however, the context between sasusaku was always romanticized

 Part 2 : http://sasukeuchihayas.tumblr.com/post/160820240389/this-comes-full-circle-in-the-gara-fight-when

Part 3 : http://sasukeuchihayas.tumblr.com/post/160820241909/if-we-do-a-time-skip-to-after-the-akatsuki-arc

[transmogrified-benmaxwell]

Why did you choose those specific zodiacs for the characters?:O

Sorry this took so long to respond to, but exams and finals have really been beating the literal shit out of me! I’m still glad you asked anon because I have lots of thoughts on this! Here’s the post anon is referring to in case anyone wants to see who is who.

Dallas: I don’t have too much to say since he’s already a Taurus, naturally I do see him more as a Pisces. Pisces tend to be the more gentle and compassionate of the signs and also tend to be more fearful in general as they are sensitive. They have a self sacrificing nature so that others will love them and not leave them and sometimes they become overly emotional when unable to cope with certain situations (i.e. Dallas being mad about Malek leaving to go to college even though he knows its irrational, but then not bringing it up because he’s self sacrificing his feelings to not make Malek upset).

Malek: If Malek isn’t a Gemini I don’t know who is. Like, this boy is a social butterfly which most Gemini’s naturally are and people are drawn to him. More often than not, people are attracted to his duality of a personality which enables him to be both intellectual (bitch wants to major in Bio-Chem and something else like double majoring and in such INTENSE fields???? He’s a fucking GENIUS) and creative/artistic (uhm??? he can sing and play three fucking instruments and even draws a little like??) which tends to be a trait of the twins. He’s well-spoken (boi speaks 3 languages and knows ASL come on now) and is funny/witty which is another trait people tend to like him for and is what makes Gemini’s more sociable. However, a downfall to the Gemini’s vast thinking is the persons indecisiveness. Malek can’t even decide at first if he really likes Dallas or is just pitying him and then when the feelings get stronger he can’t decide to tell him or how to act and it creates lots of conflict and doubt. Gemini’s don’t always have the easiest relationships because of their indecisiveness which leads to nervousness and I think is reflected a lot in Malek’s feelings for Dallas.

 Poppy: I know a lot of people kind of associate bad feelings with Scorpio’s, I actually think Poppy represents a lot of the good qualities neglected by other people that Scorpios have! Poppy is loyal to death and is very secretive in all the right ways (she literally is seeing both of her very close friends pinning over one another but shes too loyal to disclose the others secret even if something good could come out of it). She’s a strong and powerful force to be reckoned with which is why I think a majority of the baseball team respects her. However, sometimes her overwhelming passion and power are what can cause her to get confrontational (I know Poppy and Dallas have had a few hashing outs that were ugly and this makes sense for the two signs as Poppy can get jealous and resentful while Dallas can be sensitive and overemotional which can make the signs clash occasionally). At the end of the day though, Poppy really just has an overly protective and passionate heart and like most Scorpios, just really freaking wants some love. 

Parker: I thought Parker might be a Taurus, but after reading about all the signs I really found him to be a Libra. Libra’s are naturally the peace keepers of the group and have an affinity for beauty and harmony. Maybe Parker doesn’t actually go out of his way to make peace, but his common neutrality towards situations (literally one post I remember is he’s just like “I love both cats and dogs can we all get along” when discussing who was a cat or dog person I think? it really solidified this idea) and choosing to recognize both sides helps everyone feel balanced and maybe even wanna get along even if it’s just for his sake (not that they all fight or anything that frequently?). Parker’s absolute adoration for nature and hiking and the outside makes sense with the Libra sign as they have a thing for peace and beauty which can both be seen in nature through Parker’s eyes. Also, his general charming sweet nature can totally be seen by everyone (uhm let us not forget how Shook Tyler was when Parker gave him the honey lemony thing with ease bc Parker is a sweetheart and even though he’s shy, he can lowkey be a charmer without knowing it). His downfalls are seen in the Libra sign as he’s prone to being able to see both sides to any situation, but this can leave him feeling voiceless as sometimes people have a black and white way of thinking. He often retreats and gives up when conflict arises and lets others voice over him, rather than actually giving his peacemaking opinions. I believe he’s also got a strong empathetic nature which can be a downfall when it leads him to being manipulated or guilted into believing things very easily. 

Ben: Hmm Ben was harder as I don’t have too much information on my boi yet, but I found him to be like a Sagittarius because of his good humor and natural friendliness. Everyone likes him and everyones his friend because we’re all attracted to his humorous nature and positive outlook on most situations, however, I think maybe this is what can cause him to repress lots of his feelings. His willingness to be positive for others and neglect his personal needs can cause him to ignore his own feelings to make sure he isn’t bringing anyone down? I’m not sure, I’d have to know more and so this is my guess, but if this is it then he’s likely a Sagittarius as they often forget to tend to their own needs when trying to be sunshine for everyone else and never wanting to lose the positivity their friends/family bring them.

Blake: Aside from Malek’s, I think Blake’s was the easiest sign to critically evaluate and put out there because he’s so OBVIOUSLY a freaking Cancer. Those under the Cancer sign are absolute softies and are so freaking lovable, but sadly, you can only see this side of the sign if you get close enough to break through their hard, grumpy outer layer. More often than not, Cancer’s have a hard time expressing their real emotions and this can partially explain Blake’s “I hate everyone” personality because it’s so much easier to pretend he hates everyone else when really he just can’t talk about how much he hates himself. This can also help explain Blake having negative feelings towards Dallas because Dallas is more sensitive and isn’t quite on the same level of hiding emotions as Blake is and how Blake might see it as is, here is this kid who’s open (somewhat) about his feelings which is pathetic and is loved more than he is meanwhile Blake’s putting all his emotions and feelings in the closet to not burden those around him and he’s regarded as an asshole. Another downfall of the Cancer sign that Blake has is his clinginess because afterall, once he finds someone he can actually open up to, it’s hard for him to ever want to let go of the one person that brings that out of him. This can really make him look like a needy, grumpy jerk, but honestly this boi just wants some love and relief my guys. Just some more little things, Cancer signs are so imaginative and loving/protective and this can be seen in his love for theater and literature, and his way of treating those he’s especially close close to.

Tyler: Lmao lowkey made Tyler a Taurus because it’s got a very nice compatibility with the Cancer sign and I’m Gay™, but also not the only reason. The Taurus sign is a stubborn one, much like the Bull that represents it. This can be both good and bad as he’s stubborn when it comes to arguing and fighting, but this can be great when the person of the sign is on your side of things as they are fiercely loyal and willing to be patient with those willing to try and he’s very reliable. This is kinda shown in Tyler’s friendship (hhMMMM 👀) with Blake as he stubbornly cares about Blake despite his negative tendencies and stays loyally by his side. This somewhat leads to Tyler enabling Blake as once said in a post, but Tyler can’t help it under the Taurus sign because once he’s become attached he’ll do whatever he can to make his partner happy (even if it’s not always by the best means). This can lead to some self sacrificing which the Taurus sign will happily do (only if they want to though, never by force they are too stubborn for that) and kinda explains why Tyler enables Blake despite his better opinion and sacrifices being batter so that Blake can. Much like the Taurus sign he craves stability and some kind of routine, but also too much can be boring.

Phoebus: Okay don’t judge me for this but essentially, my first reasoning for making Phoebus an Aries was because I saw this pun about Aries signs that always “ram” through their problems LOL and it led me to just think this is how Phoebus battled through his osteosarcoma. Literally just slammed his head at test results in doctors offices until they changed to healthier ones. Aside from that idiotic note, Phoebus is witty and confident much like the Aries sign which is what causes him to clash with Malek when he acts all foolhardy and shit. If Malek and him could stop being so competitive, you’d actually find they’d be pretty compatible friends (or lovers???). He’s energetic and full of an adventurous attitude which will likely lead our poor mans in trouble. RIP

Dev: I don’t really know, in a lot of ways Dev just kinda reminds me of Malek and this leads me to connect them as Gemini bros. Dev is charismatic and a social butterfly and those are some high characteristics of the Gemini sign since they’re supposed to be the best communicators. 

Noah: I solely made Noah a Leo because Leo’s tend to have an almost pretentious nature around them as they tend to think highly of themselves (not all Leo’s, lmao not here to offend anyone!) and having the upbringing Noah does it only makes sense. He’s not afraid to speak his mind which is both beneficial (he helped our eggman the greg man when he stood up to his father) and negative (I wouldn’t say he probably hasn’t offended a ton of people in his time). A positive though is he’s clearly “creative” much like the Leo sign with his making movies and stuff.

Paulina: We really know nothing about Paulina yet, all we know is she is absolutely stunning and has the purest smile. I really just want her to be a sensitive Pisces because they can be the most caring and endearing sign of all and if I get to see that smile forever because she is constantly being a sweetheart than I will die accepting her as a Pisces taking it to the grave.

Charlie: We also don’t know a lot about Charlie, but since she is the team manager I put her as a Sagittarius under the assumption that she can at least be somewhat disciplined and is really good at organizing and being productive. I assume she is ambitious and maybe in my minds eye I like to imagine her as a sweet ol’ grouchy pants so pessimism is her Thing™

Sara: I’m all for loud and proud shameless lesbians so I was reading up on Virgo’s and the word comes from the word Virgin which by original definition meant ‘beholden to no man’ so my gay ass starts kicking and I am like, yes yes Sara is a Virgo die hard lesbian who will never bow down to the cis white man! But aside from that nonsense, Virgo’s tend to be independent creatures and this is a vibe I get from my girl Sara, she probably keeps lots of things unsaid about herself whether from shyness or past drama or both. However, she’s not so independent that she is uncaring or unloving and she likely tends to fret over the others wellbeing when they act foolish or put themselves at risk (i.e. my girl Sara will take a baseball to the face for Poppy 2k17 its time to ride or die bitch theres no going back)

Ari: Maybe I’m just biased towards Capricorns but I just see them as the grouchy “i love you now shut the fuck up” types and this is what I get from Ari. Much like other Capricorns, it’s difficult for Ari to express their feelings ESPECIALLY ones of affection (Ari “I’m allergic to loving expression pls don’t ever smile that fondly at me again I might vomit” Florenosos). Instead, due to the hiccup in miscommunication, they tend to relay their feelings using other likely troubling means (i.e. Ari bullying Phoebus to show affection lmao same). 

Wendy: Honestly Wendy’s feminist ride or die attitude is what led me to Aquarius because this sign tends to be the humanitarian of the signs and strive for equality in all aspects of life. She freaking defaced school property to prove a point my guys she’s a freaking Aquarius like only the Aquarius sign goes that hard and to such lengths to make sure their voice is heard.

Greg: Gregman the Eggman is a Virgo because he’s hella shy and independent. Boy can’t speak for himself for shit but often makes sure to look out for others (i.e. making sure Noah doesn’t do dumb shit and protecting the five foot weasel even though he can’t communicate the problematic things said weasel does). He’s practical and analytical and this often is what leads others to dismiss him as boring because he’s too shy to show any other side of himself or his interests. All in all, the eggman needs better friends and to erupt from his yolk filled shell.

Welp that’s pretty much all I got. I could literally be on the ball or so far from the truth that Bell is literally laughing their ass off at my poor attempt at analyzing these characters. NEVERTHELESS, I tried and here you go. Go read eerie crests here and thank/support the precious author and artist @littlestpersimmon for the content we get

[thankyoumskobayashi]

the backstory: orb wt au

gai and juggs are neighbors (aliens) who travel the universe battling each other and other fighters. gai is the Chosen One whose personality the legendary Black Trigger Orbcalibur is compatible with since its last user died thousands of Orb Years ago. juggs stole the most powerful Black Trigger from w/e the combination of PIS and aftofractal is called, so now they're after him to get it back.

sometimes rarely gai and juggs decide to team up and when they do they work together perfectly, watching each other's backs. their opponents using normal triggers are amazed until they a. get killed b. see one (juggs) take advantage of this temporary trust to attack the other (gai). their battles destroy a lot of shit so eventually gai makes juggs leave for another planet.

they showed up on earth right in front of naomi whie she was walking home to her apartment. juggler held her at swordpoint until gai turned his trigger off, then he let her go and disappeared. gai rushed over and made sure she was okay. instead of being scared, he found naomi was excited and had filmed the whole thing. then he begged her not to upload it, and she told him to join her vtl team.

naomi's site is based around vtl bc despite her uncle working there, she doesn't hear anything about their activities. so she and jetta and shin film their agents fighting neighbors as much as possible bc the rest of the public wants to know too. eventually it grew to a point where shibukawa brought her and jetta and shin into vtl hq just because they wont Stop. naomi told them that for the price of becoming a vtl agent every day, she would Stop. then shin caused a siren somewhere else in vtl using his phone, the three kicked their captors in the shons, and ran for it.

after that, vtl welcomed the three as trainee agents. they worked their way up for over a year, but they still couldn't form a squad bc they didn't have a third combatant. now, naomi welcomed the chance to get a powerful fighter on their team, even if he was a neighbor (a being from another world.) she made vtl accept gai as an agent, and then showed him the standard-issue triggers telling him to pick some.

he chose his immediately: kogetsu L + R, meteora, viper, and asteroid, shield, teleport, and chameleon. they were the most like Orbcalibur after all. when he transformed, he was frustrated to see that his cowboy hat didnot manifest like it does in Orbcalibur. he also missed his harmonica, which juggs had stolen before vanishing after their last fight. on the vtl enrollment day, he didn't even transform in the simulation room because he didnt have his signature things. juggs appeared in the room (his power is making portals, like moira in the anime) with gai to urge him on.

vtl agents were panicking, everyone wanted gai to get out of there, but he was like "nah, it's cool." only naomi listened, bc she sat down w a bag of popcorn to watch juggs and gai fight. gai fought earnestly, nearly matching juggs but a bit slower bc he wasn't used to this trigger. when he began to falter, juggs smirked and asked him why he was bothering with these humans. gai answered "because" and redoubled his attacks. by this time, a-rank and b-rank agents had evacuated the trainees and were advancing on the training room. juggler eyed them with distaste before pinning gai to the wall and murmuring in his ear, "show them your true power." he smirked as gai refused, then disappeared into a portal.

gai sighed, then faced his simulated bamster. a slash, and it was over. he walked out to see the rest of the agents gawking. naomi was cheering and waving her bag of popcorn.

"do it again!" jetta called. gai shrugged and returned to defeat a marmod, two bamsters, and a bander all at once. then he explained that juggler sometimes showed up to annoy him and that he'd keep juggs under control. the other agents had the Doubt.jpg look on their faces but they agreed.

eventually shin made the necessary ajustments to gai's triggers: custom trion body with cowboy hat and coat and jeans, custom viper in the shape of a harmonica (the bullets are the notes), and possibly illegal custom teleport that allows gai to teleport wherever he's thinking of going, not just where he can see.he doesnt use it in 1v1 battles to level up, he just wanted it n case juggs showed up again. shin hid the software from even other vtl engineers.

he levels up ridiculously easy. the other rookies are jealous and gang up on him, but no one who's fought juggs for years will lose to a bunch of rookies. after gai wins his second 1v1 rank war juggs teleports into it. "well, well, well.... kurenai gai... it appears you're playing with the HUMANS now. was i not good enough for the chosen one?" some foolish rookies who had been watching this decide to attack. juggs stabs their trion bodies with only one portal. they appear in the booths shaken but unharmed.

"i won't let you hurt them!" gai says, putting himself between juggler and the rest of them. juggler laughs. "if i mean that little to you, i could just join these humans as well to make sure none of them kill you before i do."

"wha-?" gai reaches for empty space as a scorpion sword appears in his middle. he turns around and slices off his opponent's head right before bailout and it ends in a tie.

then juggler walks into vtl hq and convinces threatens? maybe the vtl execs to make him an agent starting now. then he rookie-crushes until he meets gai, why by that time is a b-rank agent and able to join naomi's squad. their emblem is a gear, a camera, a tilted spyglass, and a harmonica. juggler is livid abt this partially bc he was a team w gai first and partly bc the team outfits are so hot. their colors are red, yellow, and purple. he didnt think that aesthetic would work but it did. juggler wants to face them but doesnt want to join a team.

naomi and her team eventually level up to outrank her uncle, who does solo rank wars but no team stuff. she teaches gai to look at his fucking radar for once, teaches him to scan for enemies... she has no idea his side effect is sensing others' trion levels/presences. he is by nature a loner who can handle himself, but when they get higher in the ranks they face a lot more competent opponents. meanwhile juggler makes no secret of his black trigger teleportation powers and uses it to fight gai during their rank battles. the entire team and all of their opponents were wiped out as a result of such a clash. they continued fighting until the rank wars setting expired and then juggler evaporated leaving gai to his severe talking-to.

instead of attempting to kill juggler and spare themselves later on, vtl decides to put gai on probation. naomi's mom, who is a higher-up and legendary trigger user, votes for it and suggests taking a look at his trigger. gai complies, leaving him only with Orbcalibur, but he doesn't use it when a bunch of thugs beat him up. juggler appears. "why won't you use it? why??? it would be so easy to defeat them all." gai looks up, gasping. "because it would be destroying what made Orbcalibur choose me in the first place." then they teleport to vtl's headquarters and find a nice, secluded spot to fuck (it's nighttime). then juggler entices gai over to a practice room and they think they're alone so they have a 1v1.

gai vs juggs 1v1 infinite trion black trigger deathmatch. be there or be square. anyway i can't decide who walks in on them so i'll end ot there

[roominthecastle]

Okay but Sting’s Desert Rosé... I am officially fixated on this one

bc Cheers!!!!

bc I’m almost sure it’s Michael’s handiwork. He has the ability to construct such things + a history of hiding puns in them, e.g. “Strangers Under the Train” & “Bend It Like Bentham” can be spotted in the background in his trolley problem simulation (TPS)) + Janet doesn’t leave the tape room

bc it specifies that the bar serving as a framework for this (forbidden) meeting w/ Eleanor is named after Sting’s Desert Rose which Sting described as a song of romantic-sexual longing placed within a larger philosophical context - “romantic love as an analog for the greater love of God” [x] and thus redemption (see the “Redeem Yourself” poster on the wall by the door).

Now overthinking/reading into things is my forte, and that’s exactly what’s happening behind the cut, so beware:

The puns in Michael’s TPS have direct relevance not only to the “practical nature” of the simulation at hand (strangers are literally under the trolley as they keep mowing them down amidst spurting blood and flying body chunks that “curiously” only hit poor Chidi despite Eleanor’s close proximity), but also cleverly hint at Michael’s own feelings on the issue that won’t get revealed until later. Bentham’s famous “greatest-happiness principle” governs his actions when he chooses to sacrifice himself to give Eleanor & the others a chance to secure passage to the real Good Place where eternal happiness awaits. He “bends it like Bentham”.

IF we can take TPS as precedent (and that’s a big if, I know, but it’s fun), then Sting’s Desert Rosé is also likely to be more than just a simple pun. Then it is both relevant to the practicalities of the situation at hand (it is a bar that serves wine) and to feelings which have not been articulated yet and will come into play later. Michael’s solution to the trolley problem (self-sacrifice) develops silently and remains in the background until a situation demands its disclosure. The implication of Sting’s Desert Rosé is a feeling of deep longing for the love of a woman and even that of a higher being (God) - a painful desire to return to the “good place” (or the “pre-fall” condition).

Michael is already invested in how Eleanor sees him and he also wished to follow them to the real Good Place, but since he is still a demon, gaining both her & (the show’s version of) God’s love (=entry) must feel like a long shot at best. I think he became painfully aware of this as a result of those ethics lessons and his billion failed attempts to sneak into the Good Place. All this likely informed his trolley problem solution, too. Being made aware of how fundamentally disqualified he is hasn’t enabled him to change it, it just made him feel miserable since the longing is still there, a longing no other “sane” demon has. Yet it doesn’t stop him from trying to help the others, which makes me wanna wrap him in an eternal hug.

If we look at the lyrics and compare/contrast them w/ the show, several thematic similarities emerge. (ofc these could be entirely accidental and/or irrelevant, but they are still there, imo)

“I am looking for myself and my loved one”

The Algerian Arabic intro (which sounds almost like a prayer) sums up Michael’s journey of discovering what it means/feels to be human. Such a journey inevitably involves the pains & pleasures of choice, of identity forging, and the experience of love (returned or otherwise). Janet started out as an anthropomorphized mainframe and now, after a social “evolution” induced by environment interacting w/ some unique “susceptibility”, she is questioning what/who she is. Michael is in the same boat: he started out as an office drone demon but that’s not quite what/who he is anymore. Both were obedient workers “pre-programmed” to serve but now they make their own paths separate from their kind. They threw out the rulebook and are actively choosing the recipients of their devotion, even when those recipients can no longer remember them.

“I dream of love as time runs through my hand those dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire My life is for you”

Janet gravitates toward Jason and Michael toward Eleanor in particular. They have to let them go at the end of S2 as another round of experiment kicks off, but one connection, in form of ticker tapes, remains and we can see them holding and reading these w/ unwavering commitment. It’s likely just a coincidence but a very nice one still, so I am going there: the word “ticker” can refer to a watch (and thus time), the heart, and the machine connecting Michael and Janet to Eleanor and Jason respectively.

The titular desert rose is not without concrete relevance, either. All her life Eleanor lived in Arizona which is home to several deserts (Sonoran, Mojave, Chihuahuan). This is at the core of one of my favorite gags where Michael keeps asking the freshly rebooted Janet for Eleanor’s file, and she keeps handing him cacti instead. Then, when she finally produces the file, it still has a bunch of cactus pictures in them. If we roll w/ this desert connection, then Eleanor = desert rose def works too (+ she is wearing red in the bar scene)

“This memory of Eden haunts us all This desert flower This rare perfume, is the sweet intoxication of the fall”

The fall and Eden are key elements in Genesis. Eve shares the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil w/ Adam and they get booted from paradise. Something similar happens in the show, too, albeit w/ some neat twists. Eleanor insists that Michael attend Chidi’s ethics lessons (=“tree”) where they acquire knowledge (=“fruit”) of, yes, good and evil. She shares it w/ him and it changes Michael, which leads to his disobedience or “fall” and ultimate banishment as their “good place” gets completely disassembled.

Michael has a spark of deviance in him from the get-go, an innate urge to color outside the lines, but he starts to cross them in earnest only after Eleanor enters the picture. First, it’s in the form of 802 reboots, which is 800 more than he is authorized for, but he gets fixated on besting her. The 2nd big moment is when he takes his senior staff pin (the very symbol of everything he ever wanted) and pins it on her, irrevocably betraying everything he previously stood for. He pulls a sort of “reverse Lucifer” (his “rebellion” takes place in the show’s approximation of hell and is driven not by pride but by humbling himself) but it’s patterned on the fall of man. This mix of demonic and human heritage would be very in-keeping w/ his character: a demon longing to experience what it’s like to be human.

“No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this.”

It is one of the greatest sources of irony in the show how the torture master ends up tormenting himself with and within the very framework he constructed for others. At the end of those 802 reboots, nobody is suffering more than Michael. His subordinates may be frustrated but they eagerly turn his failures to their advantage while the ultimate responsibility still rests w/ Michael who, already after the 2nd failed reboot, runs the very real risk of dying the only death his kind is able: the eternal shriek. The four humans endure a measure of psychological-emotional torture, but they forget all but the last week of their afterlife due to rebooting, whereas Michael remembers everything. He has to endure failure over and over again bc Eleanor keeps figuring him out, upping the pressure w/ each reboot, and, finally, exposing him to blackmail by his own underlings. This is when he reaches complete isolation which is a special kind of hell even within hell.

This 1st type of torture Eleanor (unwittingly) puts him through is mental in nature. She repeatedly hits him where it hurts the most at that time - his sense of intellectual superiority -, gradually evicting him from a life he’s known since forever. The direct continuation of this process is when she makes attendance of Chidi’s lessons compulsory, which again forces him to fully confront the fact that he’s not always the smartest guy in the room, not always in control, and - most importantly - that it’s okay bc the others are there to help and guide him when he’s in need.

This breakthrough gives way to the 2nd, more complex phase that involves (social) emotions that tend to develop as a result of cooperation (esp the kind Team Cockroach engaged in). We can already see their effect creep in when e.g. Michael is plagued by fear at the possibility of losing his friends or when he experiences the first sharp pangs of remorse. He is no longer immune to the full palette of “human suffering” bc he cares and even loves now, and it all stems from and loops back to Eleanor. She is the one he desperately clutches after the dangers pass, it’s her disappointment that slices through him even though he let the rest of them down too, and it’s her “progress reports” that fill his life after they have to part ways.

In this new phase he is forbidden to help or have any kind of contact, but when he can no longer stand doing nothing, he has to risk everything again in exchange for a few minutes w/ her. He could have easily nudged her in the right direction w/o revealing himself - the way he did when he saved her life. But no, this time he shows himself, prompts her to just ramble on about Kangaroo Jack, which, objectively speaking, is an insane risk to take when you can get caught every second, so you know Michael only took his feelings w/ him and left objectivity behind, and, at the end of it all, she still looks at him and sees a total stranger bc this is the only way for her to gain entry to paradise.

Now that’s some exquisite torture in a bar named after a song of romantic-sexual longing placed within a larger philosophical context.