#anyway Idk it’s why I hate some things at first because I get contrary and also overwhelmed internally

[gralunaisland]

I have a question.

Have you ever thought to yourself or any antis thought to themselves that it’s okay to like toxic ships in fiction?

Mashima never said a day in his life that his ships weren’t toxic and were healthy so idk why yall be so upset that people like these things?

Toxic ships in exist in fiction and real life. I love reading toxic relationships in fiction. I eat it up but I understand that’s not okay for real life.

If you truly want to see toxic relationships in fiction read Korean comics. They have some extremely toxic relationships in their stories and I love them all because it’s only fiction. It’s a reason why things like this exist because people like me exist to read it.

Is It Okay to Like Toxic Ships in Fiction?

Oh, this is a fantastic question, Anon.

I have never said that no one is allowed to like toxic ships in fiction. Ever. In fact, I've said the contrary, where, yeah, even I like some toxic ships (excluding things like p*doph*lia etc.) where people clearly aren't good for each other but it's an entertaining ship regardless as long as you know it is immoral in real life. If you know you'd never support certain toxic relationships in real life, but still like certain toxic characters together, there's not much harm to it.

My biggest issue with the Pro gr///via fandom?

It's that seemingly most of them deny that gr///via is a toxic ship in the first place. That, and some of them will attack anyone who says otherwise.

That's part of the reason why I've dedicated this blog to parsing gr///via's toxicity, to show why so many Antis have issues with it and because there are so many people who refuse to believe that gr///via is toxic in any way, shape, or form.

I've actually talked to Pros who acknowledge that gr///via is a toxic ship, but that they just like it for some reason or another, and I totally respect that because they realize it's a toxic ship. While I hate the "it's just fiction" argument because it's a dreadful slippery slope, all in all, gr///via really is just a fictional ship between two people of the same age.

You say Mashima has never said his ships were healthy, but that doesn't matter, and that's never been an argument that I've made, that Mashima said he'd make healthy ships (which of course he didn't). Most authors don't go around explicitly saying that anyway, so that's another reason why that is a straw man argument.

However, another part of my issue with gr///via is that it's a canon ship, one that Mashima pushes heavily, and it is portrayed as something to be desired.

There are plenty of toxic ships people make up on their own, fanon, where the author never intended for it to be a thing, in which case it's the fans' fault for making up such a thing, but the fact that the author of FT makes juvia a complete scumbag but makes it so that she ultimately gets the object of her desires teaches the very wrong lesson. He also tries to make her pass as a "good person", having everyone love her and cheer her on no matter what she does to them.

If you make a character do very toxic things, but also make them appear good to other people in the show and make it so they never face any consequences for their actions (the worst consequence juvia ever gets from her sick behavior is some sweatdrops from other characters, but no one ever stops her and many in fact encourage her), readers/viewers might get the impression that that character really is a good person, and that their actions should be emulated to get their desired results. Mashima has even apparently said in an interview that Gray is somewhat of a self-insert, so the fact that he gave Gray juvia as his love interest says a lot about what Mashima desires or fetishizes.

"If you truly want to see toxic relationships in fiction read Korean comics."

I have, and that has nothing to do with this conversation. "If I truly want to see toxic relationships", all I have to do is watch Fairy Tail and suffer through every gr///via/juvia scene.

Thanks for your ask!

[baekhvuns]

BAEKSY! I just realised my message didn't go through and now it's gone cause I can't remember what I said, but I'm currently at Osaka airport waiting for my delayed flight to Thailand and I have some things to say!

First of all, bald Kai I- 💔 I watched a bit of his fanmeeting livestream and two of my friends went, it was so bittersweet, ehhh. This is such a fucking mess overall. Idk if SM is to blame, but I think we should blame everything on that shitass company! And fucking Armchairs on Twitter are a bit too brave shitting on Kai now that BTS started their enlistment era. Just saw his goodbye pics with EXO 😩😩😩😩

Also people keep talking about Taeyong's enlistment I CAN'T STAND THIS!!! Hopefully not this year cause I'm gonna jump!!! At least we're getting TOLO 🤧❤ (and hopefully Ten's solo too, otherwise SM is going to burn) - btw why is everyone coming back in June?! Happy Pride or whatever lmao, but I won't be able to keep up...

Continuing my SM hate posting: SHAWOLS WON, now it clearly wasn't that hard to find a good venue for Shinee's fan meet, huh? Took them a few days to book an arena for two days BULLYING COMPANIES WORKS!

And now: LUCAS OUT FINALLY! 🥰 but the statement is so??? Nothing about the accusations, did they just forget and hoped we all moved on as well? Delulu Lumis are saying it's a confirmation of his innocence and I'm asking: WHERE?! Even someone I know who's rather neutral towards him thinks so too... he literally admitted to doing some bad things, but what kind of bad things? We'll never know. And he's still at SM for what? He's basically done for in China and Korea. And imagine him at all the SM family parties lmao? Realistically I know some if not most NCT members are probably in touch with him, but it'd be awkward regardless 😬

But I feel like I've manifested his departure so I'm celebrating anyway <3

Speaking of, I saw WayV and they're definitely not flopping after selling out 10k capacity venue for two days in a row - contrary to what some Lookass fanatics think. And I also witnessed some hoery for sure 😭😭😭😭 when they performed Nectar in velvet tank tops?! Saw so many arms and nipples...

Uhm and what?! https://twitter.com/allkpop/status/1654604798027612167?t=Pc2ErSTf2E-xRvpBqqk30g&s=19 - Go to jail!!!

And ofc I saw Atz too, even though my seat was meh, still better than I expected, but I was dying of period pains so my experience was 📈📉📈📉 I also didn't have good company so rip. But yes, I had Hwa tunnel vision (shocking nsjajsjabwjjsjsjan), Mingi and Hongjoong were so cool too! Poor Wooyoung though... he seriously needs to rest, he was clearly pushing himself too hard :/

Anyway justice for Hwa pls, I have plenty of space at home, just live with me <333 https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1655905041272950786?t=Zy51BJ8vRsBCvoBx_BpM6A&s=19

Now cast him in a historical/fantasy drama asap!!! https://twitter.com/sansikcheo/status/1653612125347278851?t=rMsN2BwEbJFpP3ahXPM2CA&s=19

Ahuauwwhwabshaaha https://twitter.com/taemcatboy/status/1654935684212314113?t=hNIZSQNcuxqys6uT2BCzbg&s=19 - Okay but this bitch saying this insane, because he won't do shit, he can't even sign anything without people holding the pen for him BE SERIOUS

Stays tho 😘https://twitter.com/onlychangbin/status/1654810925088530433?t=jQpm4-U3r3hvI8iMrUN2sg&s=19

Btw Taeyong https://twitter.com/taeoho/status/1652946027429740545?t=uaJxDmZqPiqvrDal4g5vAg&s=19 man is so delusional... don't worry TY, you can always count on me! ❤ love when idols get parasocial, I'm like "get a grip, mate!"

His impact https://twitter.com/aquilandromeda/status/1652336195827900418?t=AmQt2CQwxg7EBU2nHbVlEA&s=19

Anyhoooow, what's up in the Baeksy land?! 👀 - DV 💖

hello!!!

BAEKSY! I just realised my message didn't go through and now it's gone cause I can't remember what I said, but I'm currently at Osaka airport waiting for my delayed flight to Thailand and I have some things to say!

AAAAA no worries!!! the recent updates w tumblr has made it hard to receive asks! AAAAAAAAAAAAAA OFF TO THAILAND!! pls let us know if the food is really really spicy <3 also hope u landed safely!!!

First of all, bald Kai I- 💔 I watched a bit of his fanmeeting livestream and two of my friends went, it was so bittersweet, ehhh. This is such a fucking mess overall. Idk if SM is to blame, but I think we should blame everything on that shitass company! And fucking Armchairs on Twitter are a bit too brave shitting on Kai now that BTS started their enlistment era. Just saw his goodbye pics with EXO 😩😩😩😩

Also people keep talking about Taeyong's enlistment I CAN'T STAND THIS!!! Hopefully not this year cause I'm gonna jump!!! At least we're getting TOLO 🤧❤ (and hopefully Ten's solo too, otherwise SM is going to burn) - btw why is everyone coming back in June?! Happy Pride or whatever lmao, but I won't be able to keep up...

i

exo, ot8, lasted for 4 weeks.

4 weeks.

the first full comeback in 4 years, the world tour, the promo, the solo concerts-

saw the post from exos acc and the “the weather is nice” and i already knew what was gonna go down

THE SK PRESIDENT DIDNT EXIST SO WHY DOES KAI HAVE TO 😭😭😭 kai has had multiple surgeries on his back and waist???? has herniated discs that he still hasn't received treatment for because his schedule won’t FUCKING allow it, broke the same ankle twice??? has nerve damage, poor eyesight and poor hearing??? WHY IS THE ENLISTING??? WHAT EXCUSE DOES THE PRESIDENT HAVE 🔫

A MESS !! THIS IS THE WORST ENLISTMENT TO DATE OH MY GOD AND ITS ALL PEICE OF SHIT RAVI AND SM’S FAULT I DO NOT CARE ravi already fucked things up w his evading, sm- oH they piss me of so much, they ruined my entire year,,,, oh im so, i want to attack the person at sm ohhhhh i AM FURIOUS.

he was gonna apply for the 3rd delay for the comeback and all,, had a gucci event in kr where he was the main person for, was gonna have solo concerts in august- he.

i hope u saw my meltdown post, i was GOING THROUGH IT. WE CAN NEVER, NEVER HAVE NICE THINGS W EXO 😭😭😭 WHAT FUCKING LUCK DO THEY GOT BC IF I WAS THEM I WOULD NOT HAVE SURVIVED ALL THEIR YEARS WHAT THE ABSOLUTEFUCK HAS MY LIFE BECOME QJKDQHK AND HES GOING FOR 2 YEARS 😭😭😭 FUCK!!!! FUCK SM FUCK RAVI FUCK EVERYONE!!!!!!! IT WAS GONNA BE EXOS YEAR 😭😭😭😭

saw armchairs forget how to do math bc i saw many saying bts will finish enlistment before exo and 😭😭exo has 2 left and we know abt the others 😭😭 all the 93 liners roaming free put my guys in the barracks lessgo team bonding <3 getting too brave too brave, the victim complex is coming out, saw them make fun of him bc he was crying, which they all misspread and 🔫 and this on god fucking disgusting

HIS FAREWELL PHOTOS HOW IS THIS FUCK SO HOT EVEN WITH HIS HAIR CHOPPED???? WHAT THE FUCK saw this post and cried my eyes out,, saw a post saying his members and managers and friends prepared everything for him bc it’s usually the father who prepares everything and i. sobbed. and now sehun would have to go to i do not know how to handle that after this <3 bro had chelsea fans saying good luck to him 😭

but like is he kinda fine with that bald look

TAEYONG, FUCK! FUCK! IM SURE TAEIL IS ALSO GONNA GO THIS TIME AROUND TOO FUCK THE MILITARY 😭😭😭😭 SM NEEDS TO BURN TO THE GROUND

Continuing my SM hate posting: SHAWOLS WON, now it clearly wasn't that hard to find a good venue for Shinee's fan meet, huh? Took them a few days to book an arena for two days BULLYING COMPANIES WORKS!

SHAWOLS REALLY SAID 90 (+5’) HOW HARD WAS IT TO FIND A BIG VENUE??? LIKE THERES SO MANY?? THE KSPO DOME??? THE JAMSIL STADIUM?? KOREAS THE LIMIT??? DO EVERYTHING FOR THEM?? BULLYING SM REALLY WORKS AND UNFORT ITS THE ONLY WAY FOR THEM TO WORK 😭

And now: LUCAS OUT FINALLY! 🥰 but the statement is so??? Nothing about the accusations, did they just forget and hoped we all moved on as well? Delulu Lumis are saying it's a confirmation of his innocence and I'm asking: WHERE?! Even someone I know who's rather neutral towards him thinks so too... he literally admitted to doing some bad things, but what kind of bad things? We'll never know. And he's still at SM for what? He's basically done for in China and Korea. And imagine him at all the SM family parties lmao? Realistically I know some if not most NCT members are probably in touch with him, but it'd be awkward regardless 😬 //// But I feel like I've manifested his departure so I'm celebrating anyway &lt;;3

omg i genuinely somehow did not expect this i was expecting him pulling up to the next cb like nothing happened sO I AM SURPRISED 😳 confirmation of the innocence when the dude literally withdrew???

we’ll never know fr fr! YEAH ARW THEY PLANNING TO LAUNCH HIM AS A SOLO OR ACTOR IN CHINA?? as far as i know,,, china don’t want him either 🤨 not wayv unfollowing him so fast after he left fbwndbks manifested it LITERALLY

Speaking of, I saw WayV and they're definitely not flopping after selling out 10k capacity venue for two days in a row - contrary to what some Lookass fanatics think. And I also witnessed some hoery for sure 😭😭😭😭 when they performed Nectar in velvet tank tops?! Saw so many arms and nipples.../// Uhm and what?! https://twitter.com/allkpop/status/1654604798027612167?t=Pc2ErSTf2E-xRvpBqqk30g&s=19 - Go to jail!!!

OH THEY DEFINITELY ARE NOT!! WAYV ARE STILL GOING STRONG, their vocals 🤌🏻😮‍💨HOERY FOR SURE FBWNDHSK it’s not a nct concert if someone is not stripping fbwkdjsk

i need lee soo man to fuck off, ban this man from korea, he has ruined exo’s cb, shinee’s fanmeet, ruined my year,,, stop begging for a company to get u back, like come on?? have some self respect and fuck off??

And ofc I saw Atz too, even though my seat was meh, still better than I expected, but I was dying of period pains so my experience was 📈📉📈📉 I also didn't have good company so rip. But yes, I had Hwa tunnel vision (shocking nsjajsjabwjjsjsjan), Mingi and Hongjoong were so cool too!  Poor Wooyoung though... he seriously needs to rest, he was clearly pushing himself too hard :/

noooooo i hope it’s better now!!! NO COME ON TERRIBLE CRAMPS, SHIT SEAT AND TERRIBLE COMPANY???

seonghwa tunnel vision, i had absolutely not they had a whole concert ngl fbwkfbwk i just saw the pictures aND REASONABLY TUNNEL VISION FOR HIM AND HIM ONLY! omg yeah it must be devastating for him to not perform but hopefully he gets better soon!

Anyway justice for Hwa pls, I have plenty of space at home, just live with me <333 https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1655905041272950786?t=Zy51BJ8vRsBCvoBx_BpM6A&s=19 /// Now cast him in a historical/fantasy drama asap!!! https://twitter.com/sansikcheo/status/1653612125347278851?t=rMsN2BwEbJFpP3ahXPM2CA&s=19

LMFAOOOO ANON THROWING RIZZ AT HWA 😭😭😭 SEONGHWA IN A PERIOD DRAMA WITH LONG HAIR! AND A SWORD W HANBOK?? A NEED A WANT!

now… this is very specific 👁

Ahuauwwhwabshaaha https://twitter.com/taemcatboy/status/1654935684212314113?t=hNIZSQNcuxqys6uT2BCzbg&s=19 - Okay but this bitch saying this insane, because he won't do shit, he can't even sign anything without people holding the pen for him BE SERIOUS //// Stays tho 😘https://twitter.com/onlychangbin/status/1654810925088530433?t=jQpm4-U3r3hvI8iMrUN2sg&s=19

LMFAOOOO THHAT WAS THE BEST OART FOR THE CORONATION + kate and her daughter’s matching tiara’s >>> NO SERIOUSLY I KNOW DIANA IS WATCHING FROM UP THERE SHE DEF SENT THAT STROM THE DAY BEFORE,, SHE’Ll fumble SOME STRINGS,,, want william to be the king bc it rly would be like it’s a diana reincarnation on the throne,, LMFAOOOO KPOP FANS ARE SO UNSERIOUS I SAW SOMEONE SAY “te amo” AS IF IT WERE VLIVE 😭😭

Btw Taeyong https://twitter.com/taeoho/status/1652946027429740545?t=uaJxDmZqPiqvrDal4g5vAg&s=19 man is so delusional... don't worry TY, you can always count on me! ❤ love when idols get parasocial, I'm like "get a grip, mate!" /// His impact https://twitter.com/aquilandromeda/status/1652336195827900418?t=AmQt2CQwxg7EBU2nHbVlEA&s=19

Anyhoooow, what's up in the Baeksy land?! 👀 - DV 💖

taeyong’s just like me fr, LMFAOOO WHEN THEY SAY “do not look at any other men” yes sir. definitely not. taeyong will always have our eyes, everything i can’t wait for his tolo,, i hope he follows his predecessors taekai and goes dark !!!!

GATEKEEP SEONGHWA FORM NON KPOPPIES BFWKJDKWDHK but srs what a handsome face ???? every time he just looks so ethereal, will never get tired of him

baeksy land is full of baeksy crying over kai <3 judging the met gala, having a scary prof (he looks like voldemort im so srs) and writing in class hiding under the tables <3

have to live thru this now 😭😭 this ai thing is so weird bc why is bruno mars singing so good in kr???? he better learn it now bc wtf,, rosé singing an avril song?? my mind kinda go crazy

SPEAKING OF RECENT COMEBACKS ,,, ÆSPA AND GIDLE??? pls is this not a 2000’s romcom ost reminded me a big of why can’t i and oNE I CANT PUT MY FINGER ON IT BUT I THINK HONEY HONEY FROM MAMMA MIA TOO!

but how has ur travel been so far!!

[chemicalpink]

If it’s alright with you could you do an astrology post about how bts would flirt with a person they were attracted to?

So.. god I really hate disclaimers because I like to believe that we are all reasoning people, plus there’s a general disclaimer on my page BUT I know for a fact that people don’t read that (those same people won’t read this one anyway).

Disclaimer: This analysis/reading is based on my experience and knowledge of astrology, it is not meant to be the absolute truth, as BTS are real people, and astrology can only capture so much about multidimensional humans that have had past experiences and cultural approaches amongst other things, it does not have to resonate with you since this is in no way related to anyone reading it (unless you are a member of BTS in which case, get out of here lol ) This is just for entertainment purposes.

OKAY NOW THAT THAT’S OVER by default, Venus and Mars could give us an insight into their love styles, but I’ve already got reading about those here, here, and here 

We are going to use those BUT I’ll focus on their EROS (if you want me to do actual research and post a full love life analysis for each member, let me know in my ask)

SO BASICALLY THIS IS BTS’  FLIRTING STYLE ACCORDING TO THEIR VENUS, MARS, AND EROS. 

Kim Seokjin ʕっ˘ڡ˘ςʔ

I feel like a dad joke to tune into the other person’s humor is his way to go.

His Eros in Scorpio points to someone blunt in his approach, so something along the lines of overly flirting pick-up lines.

His Cancer Mars points to his overall romantic self so if Kim Seokjin is flirting with you prepare to live a drama scene where you feel like the only person in the world.

His Capricorn Venus reinforces the fact that this man is straightforward when flirting, and is very VERY selective as to who they approach.

So all in all, these three placements tell me that Kim Seokjin is a man that loves the fact that people are so multidimensional and he is here for it! he wants to know everything about the person he decided to approach because this man’s standards are over the top and he knows it. 

There's a lot of talking involved while getting to know each other, although he drops facts about himself here and there along with some funny storytimes, he will make it all about you.

A gentleman at his finest, drop you by your house, make sure you’re not cold, that you’re enjoying your food, that you’re comfortable.

This man’s way into your heart is ultimately his actions + his humor.

Min Yoongi  /ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ\

He’s... silent. Kinda shy, okay very shy, unless you gave off a great vibe, you’re not getting past awkward introductions and anxious small talk.

If you make it past introductions(because let’s be real, this man’s standards? impossible to fulfill), you’re in for a ride.

His Eros in Capricorn makes him crave to connect in a physical sense, even if it’s just hand-holding during dates, funny enough, this placement is the hardest one to make him open up so.. he’s not talking much about himself.

EVEN FUNNIER his Aries Venus points to someone bold and confident, which I can totally see him doing, the first move if he sees someone that plays into his idea of perfection.

Idk why it just strikes me as he knows what he wants from people, he’s not afraid of a challenge and chase, and his boldness as well as need for physical touch, makes him a great candidate for a fun short term, especially since his Eros signals that he pretty much values work more than love life.

Yoongi is... very much handled by his ego self, so he might be aloof at times, it has to do with his terrible high standards, a somewhat fear of intimacy and love for his work that keeps him from any type of social life (because he values work too much), but this man is also very romantic, and a great listener, as it is told by his Cancer Mars.

It’s all a matter of getting through his hard skin to get to the mushy Yoongi he doesn’t let many people experience.

Jung Hoseok ʕ♡˙ᴥ˙♡ʔ

This man loves a challenge, the thrill of the chase, not very healthy if you ask me but hey, you do you.

Playing hard to get will most certainly interest him. As well as letting him help you so he can “save the day”. This is all according to his Aries Eros. 

True to his Eros, his Aquarius Mars makes him be the biggest fan of flirting, and he obviously succeeds, thanks to his huge charisma and wittiness. 

LISTEN- THIS MAN as oblivious to affection as he is, can flirt with a whole group of people at once.

Free-spirited and quick-witted people are his cup of tea since it makes it easier for him to keep the flirting flow going.

I know I’ve said it many times before in this post, ISN’T IT FUNNY his Pisces Venus points to him being shy and awkward but cute, which I think pretty much describes Hobi, minus the shy.

So all in all, Hoseok flirting magnet, he is all smiles and will fill your heart with cute stuff and funny things, also, KING of not giving off mixed signals, he doesn’t even have to say a word, he flirts with his whole body.

KIM NAMJOON “φʕ•ᴥ•oʔ

THIS MAN BEING AN EROS IN LIBRA MAKES SO MUCH SENSE. He has a more traditional sophisticated way of flirting, kinda like courting.

It also makes him very giving, up until the relationship is off-balanced, then things end, so yeah, he likes to give, but he also likes to receive just as much. 

Also, very much into intelligent refined people. 

Just like Yoongi and Jin, he has a Cancer Mars, which only heightens his leaning towards traditional love and courting.

He will be devoted even when flirting, wanting to know everything about the other person, even on the first date, just- very very soft Joonie.

Lowkey, as poised as he is, his Scorpio Venus will give everyone a run for their money on terms of flirting. This man knows whats he's doing and how much he affects the person he is flirting with.

He’s just- so used to flirting and connecting with people that he doesn’t have an outcome in mind, just finds flirting fun and exciting.

Basically, Namjoon is a man that knows what he wants and how to get it, but flirting stages are just so common to him, he does it out of boredness, not that he doesn’t want to connect with people, quite the contrary, he finds people so amazing, it’s just- flirting doesn’t have an endgame for him.

Might I dare to go as far as to say, Kim Namjoon might end up in a relationship by accident just because he didn’t know when to end his constant flirting. 

PARK JIMIN  •᷄ɞ•᷅ 

His Eros in Pisces makes him one of the more emotionally passionate of the bunch, to an unhealthy state, in which he may manipulate himself in order to satisfy the other person. 

There’s a lot of thought going into dates, small gifts “because they reminded me of you” and a lot of cute stuff. Very Very passionate.

He has a Scorpio Mars, so as much as he is passion-driven and very much into cute stuff, and believing that he should 100% merge with the other person, he knows what he’s doing when he flirts.

Different from Namjoon, Jimin doesn’t just flirt for funsies, he entertains the idea of love when flirting, future plans, meeting the parents, he can just see it all.

AND he also has a Scorpio Venus so he is definitely aware of all his flirting and how he affects the other person, especially since there’s a lot of sex appeal going into it.

Not so much a mystery himself, but he tries to be the perfect fit for all. Which might ultimately hide behind this perfect partner facade. 

This man doesn’t just end up in a relationship by accident, this man falls in love on accident.

KIM TAEHYUNG ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ

We’ve got another one in love with the thrill of the chase.

Tae also has Eros in Aries, so there’s a lot of playfulness involved in flirting, from banter to playfully shoving the other person aside.

Might also be into dates where he can compete with you, like arcade, or something that he disguises as competition but he knows beforehand he’ll win.

Someone tell him it’s not healthy to crave impossible relationships, anyway, he’d love to be the shinning armor in his love story.

He has Capricorn Mars, which makes him have an honest, practical, and straightforward style of flirting.

The vibe check is real, so unless you pass it with flying colors, do not expect to be flirted with.

Although, his whole aura screams social and flirty due to his Aquarius Venus, which involves a lot of charisma and a great sense of humor. 

Just like Hobi, Tae can flirt with a bunch of people at once without even trying.

JEON JUNGKOOK  ₍ᐢ ̥ ̞ ̥ᐢ₎ ♥

Flirting for Jungkook is more of a mental game than an emotional one, according to his Eros in Gemini. 

Now listen, the nerdier, the better. But you would have to approach him first, as much as he enjoys the idea of talking to people, he doesn’t really do it that well.

Just like Jimin, he has Scorpio Mars, so in line with flirting being a mental game, he knows his game plan, his moves, he knows how people will react to them, he knows what he wants, and more importantly, how to get it.

He very obviously knows about his sex appeal and uses it as an advantage, even though at first he’s kinda awkward about it.

Much like Namjoon, he enjoys flirting so much that he doesn’t even need to have an endgame in mind. He likes to hear people talking about their passions and loves it even more if he learns a thing or to about it in the way, but his awkwardness comes through when he doesn’t really measure that most of the time when you flirt its because you’re interested in pursuing a romantic relationship.

His Libra Venus also plays the part, since it signals him being flirty and witty without even trying, just a man, his beauty, his charm, and his charisma. 

He’ll do anything possible to make you feel like you matter, even going as far as daring to hold your hand just because (which is a great pointer t know if he is really interested or just flirting bc he can)

Ultimately, his flirtation serves as a means to cheer themselves and other people up.

[favberrys]

I'm bored and in a kkg brainrot mood, so i'm just gonna rant about my opinions of kakegurui ships and i will make some headcanons:

Kirasaya

Ok i had to start with them bc they're just too iconic, i think they have one of the most interesting and complex dynamics in kkg, they really got me obsessed with them, it's probably my number one kakegurui ship and the reason i started watching the show and reading the manga. Honestly yeah their relationship has some power imbalance, since sayaka is kirari's secretary, and is probably disfunctional, but contrary to what some ppl say kirasaya is not abusive, kirari never physically or emotionally abuses sayaka throughout the story. Anyway they're a 10/10, peak lesbian yearning, if they don't kiss at least one i will jump the author. Probably one of my fav ships ever, i think they're made for each other and i can't see kirasaya with anyone else, they're just so good together and their chemistry is >>>>>>

Yumary

Ok this one is kinda an unpopular opinion bc most people like yumary, but honestly i can't get invested into it, there's something in this ship that doesn't make my heart go "fuck yeah they should be gfs". Personally i don't ship yumeko with anyone bc i can't imagine her in a relationship since her main thing is being a compulsive gambler, her existence revolves around it and she forms relationships when they're useful for her gambling games. I think yumary could be friends with benefits for some time, but after a while mary would probably break it off because i don't think she can handle a sexual/romantic relationship with yumeko and after a while it would make her go nuts. A friendship between them is already messy and complicated and honestly i don't think they are compatible that way. Yes they have chemistry and there's probably some mutual attraction but to me it's a no. Also can cishet dudes stop fetishizing this ship ? My vote is 6/10, mostly bc mary doesn't seem much physically comfortable with yumeko, idk mary just seems off with her in that sense and i prefer them as gambling partners or friends.

Meariri

I honestly love this ship, especially after reading the manga, they have such an great dynamic, i think they both care about each other, they have chemistry and i think they're compatible and that their personalities compliment each other, mary is often loud and aggressive and passionate while ririka is more closed off and quiet, they're like fire and ice and this case i think the saying "opposite attract" works with them. Mary counts on ririka and i love the fact that she is so comfortable with her physically (mary is almost always the one to initiate the contact, holding her hand, touching her head, etc) and ririka gets inspired by mary to be her own person and chase her goals. Plus they're really cute together, aesthetically i find them the most attractive couple, i'll give them a solid 9/10

Itsukaede

Lmao i don't even know if this is the correct ship name for itsuki x kaede, ok i don't hate it and i think they could work as a couple, it's not my cup of tea bc m/f ships bore me, but i like their relationship, they have the kind of old married couple dynamic that always works. 6/10.

Ryomeko

I can see it happening, i don't ship it, but i don't mind it either, i'm kinda neutral about ryota x yumeko, but i think he's one of the ppl who care about yumeko the most in that academy (with also mary ofc), the ship is boring bc ryota is bland (he's a good guy don't get me wrong and he defo doesn't deserve the hate he gets) and as i said previously i don't ship yumeko with anyone. Sorry i gotta give it 5/6 out of 10

Yumedari

Ok i love midari but just like yumeko, i don't ship her with anyone bc i see her as someone who's too much unstable for relationships, but i know that canonically she loves/likes/is attracted to yumeko so i don't hate this ship, i think it's decent, the only problem is that yumeko hates midari. Still i think that since they're the most insane mfs in that school somehow this ship could work. 6/10

Yuridari

Again midari in my eyes is kinda unshippable, but this ship is not bad at all, they would have that kind of bickering married couple dynamic like itsuki and kaede, i like it but it doesn't do much for me. 7/10

Ryomary

Jsjssjsksk i looked the name of mary x ryota's ship on wiki so if it sounds weird it's bc i don't know their ship name and i have looked at the first site google gave me. This ship is hard no, mainly bc ryota is very bland and i consider mary a lesbian (i read that she is a canon lesbian but idk if it's confirmed by the author, let's say lesbian mary is just my hc) so shipping her with men feels like a hate crime to me, mary is for the girls only, 4/10.

Tsumary

They are kind of cute together right ? I think they're adorable, tsuzura is mary's first love and i think that someone like her would make mary very happy. I still haven't finished kkg twin, so my opinion on tsuzura is incompleted and it might change, i don't hate her but i find her character a little basic/boring so even though this ship is cute it doesn't make me fall in love with them. 7/10 bc probably also tsuzura had feelings for mary and they have a healthy dynamic, you can see they love each other.

Midasaya

I enjoy this crackship, i know that they both like different people but i headcanon that they were together during middle school or that midari had at least a small crush on sayaka during that time, before kirari came to hyakkaou i like to think that they explored their sexuality together so midari was probably sayaka's first kiss, her first date, etc, so they would have history together and we also see that midari knows sayaka bc her character is described through her pov during tower of doors. I find this ship pretty funny bc sayaka is always so serious and composed and midari is a ball of chaos. 7/10

Yumesaya

This is another crackship i don't mind and find hilarious, yeah i'm a huge kirasaya stan but i'm also a multishipper and sayaka deserves all the girls in the world, so the more the merrier. I like to think this ship as one sided love in which yumeko sort of pines after sayaka and i think it would be very interesting to see kirari being jeaulous that sayaka is getting yumeko's attention. We saw jeaulous/protective sayaka in kakegurui, but i would also like to see how kirari reacts when someone tries to take sayaka away from her, it would be really interesting. Obv this would create some tension between kirasaya and also between kirari and yumeko, almost a sort of love triangle dynamic. My opinion is that yumeko is just too unstable to settle down, also they both probably would get bored/lose interest in each other after the heat of the moment. 6/10

Ririsaya

Sorry but i really can't see it happening not even if i squint, but i really enjoy the ririsaya fanfictions and i think those works are pretty great even though i don't ship them very much. It would be interesting if both twins were in love with sayaka and there was some tension/coldness between them for a while bc they liked the same girl (maybe i read too many fanfictions). My headcanon is that both sayaka and ririka had a crush on each other when they first knew each other and for sayaka it was probably pretty confusing bc she already had feelings for kirari. I see them as friends, 7/10

Yumemisaori

Again idk if this is the correct name of the ship, many said that yumemi and saori are a healthier/mentally stable version of kirasaya and i agree. the dynamics are similar bc we have the secratary that is willing to do everything for her boss and the relationship is a little more balanced, i think they would be very cute together, but sadly they had very little interactions and if i could see more of them i would probably ship them even more. I like them 7/10.

Sachiko x Mary

I didn't even find a ship name for this couple, so they must be pretty unpopular, i like both characters and their antagonistic dyanamic is very interesting, but i don't ship them much bc i think mary needs/wants someone who is completely different from sachiko, who wants to make mary her pet and mary is someone who cares very much about her freedom, her indipendence and wants to make her own choices and this completely clashes with sachiko's extremely sadistic and domineering nature. I prefer them as enemies who have some sexual tension or enemies with benefits or one night stand adventure, but nothing more. 5/6 out of 10 bc the only mary ship i really love is meariri and i also like tsuzumary a bit.

Sachiko x Mikura

This is probably one of the most unhealthy relationships in kakegurui, but i kinda like it. Their dyanmic is pretty much vertical with sachiko who has all the power and makes mikuro do everything she wants and mikura who is completely obsessed and devoted to sachiko (my opinion is that she developed a sort of stockholm syndrome towards sachiko). I think that someone like sachiko could never have genuine romantic relationships bc of her extremely sadistic nature, she sees ppl like toys to break and what she enjoys the most is seeing ppl suffer, so the only compatible person with sachiko is someone extremely masochistic like mikura. Giving them a 6/7 out of 10 bc their interactions are fun/interesting and spice things up.

Rin x Ibara and Yumeko x Kirari

Hard no to both of them, i don't ship incest, yall can do what you want but personally it's a huge no for me. When i first started watching the anime at the beginning i thought yumeko and kirari had some sort of tension and could have been enemies to lovers (lmaoo i was so naive), but then i discovered they were cousins and i saw more kirasaya interactions so i got completely turned off by this ship. 3/10 to both of these ships.

Sachiko x Sakura

Now this ship is very sexy, idk why i like it but i do, yes i don't see sachiko with anyone besides mikura, but this pairing is not bad at all, even though it's a crackship. I think they would be rivals with benefits and would argue a lot and then make out/have hot sex. 7/10 (maybe it's too high but since these are just my opinions i won't be objective)

Mary x kirari

Uhm is there really someone out there who ships them ? Yeah i thought they had some sexual tension in s1 with that tea scene, but it's a no from me, i don't like it and i don't think they're compatible in any way, i can't see kirari with anyone who isn't sayaka. 4/10

[heart-forge]

Hi! Do you have any advice for someone who wants to start planning or writing an IF? Thanks have good day/night

Oh it's big night. For some reason I decided that for the last leg of this miserable marathon that is the contract I'm on, I'd do work at night. It makes my days very nice and my nights...long. So my first piece of advice is don't do that.

Besides that, my advice is to at least have some kind of plan going in—whatever planning looks like to you—and to start small.

I'm not a huge planner. I don't really like having to go through and make everything happen in the sequence that I wrote it, and god knows that even on the contract I'm on I've read the outline I am contractually obligated to make wrong about fifteen times, leading me somewhere completely contrary to where I thought I'd be at this point....but listen. I hate working on Manor Hill because I'm making it up as I go along. It adds SO MUCH STRESS to not know in hard terms what's going to happen, if only because I can't know if it's going to be good. There's a bit firmer of a plan now, but it's also why working on Valeri is easiest: I know what's going on there.

And as for starting small, you can always go big. Original Twine Manor Hill had like, autosaves. I think I might have understood how to make one manual save slot happen. Now there's five slots, a forward arrow, an icon bar...you can go big, but nothing ruins momentum like spending so much if your time trying to make so much happen in code. I find a lot of IF authors get into it from a love of writing rather than coding. I was lucky: I came at it from an obsessive love of both, and so it never bothered me to think of the learning curve I had when it came to one skill or the other. One big demoralizing thing I see among authors who come at things from a pure-writing perspective it that they're so afraid of not being able to learn code, or being too dumb to learn code (never true) that they psych themselves out, or they get overwhelmed trying to achieve this vision.

This is part and parcel of planning: understand what you feel is totally necessary for your games (you want it to look like x, you want save slots, you want to customise the PC like X), and understand what your engine/programming language is capable of doing (Twine/Harlowe can do branching narrative and hyperlinks), what you can make it do even as it screams for death (Twine/Harlowe can play audio), and what it simply can't do (Harlowe can't export saves without, perhaps, a lot of effort). Set yourself small goals.

This applies even if you're good at coding, quite frankly. IDK what your skill level is (and as always, as I said when I worked in IT, I have to come at it from the "unplug it and plug it back in" perspective because if I'm not doing that then without any context into your knowledge base, I might have already lost you) but even if you're confident, you want to set yourself achievable goals if purely because accomplishments is what keeps you going in between droughts of feedback. I haven't unlocked the secret to having people go so bananas over my games that my long update times don't alienate some people, so sometimes the sheer thrill of making a new progression system work has to stand in for pats on the head, you know?

Anyway, I hoped any of this helped. I always hated the "achievable goal" advice in high school, but I hated everything in high school. It was kind of my thing.

[yuujism]

Sun and Night. (gojo satoru x reader)

Chapter 1: Hate

chapter 2 →

| PAIRINGS: gojo satoru x reader x getou suguru

| WARNINGS: ⚠️ SPOILERS FOR HIDDEN INVENTORY ARC AND VOL. 0 IN THE MANGA ⚠️ explicit language, nsfw (next chapter will have tags), plot, too much writing, kinda modified so it can fit the story but nothing out of canon, grammar errors

| WORD COUNT: idk lol i’ll count it later

| A/N: so uhhh, i’m back i guess ??? this came to me after re reading the manga and kinda yearned for some angst between gojo and reader because they both loved suguru so much 😽 and i love suguru a lot too and i miss him dearly anyway !! please check the post before this one to know what will go on with my other series !! right now i’m taking my time to write :( anyway hope you enjoy!! i hope it’s not kinda half asses though sorry ):

summary;

You and Satoru were in love.

You were both so deeply in love, just not with each other.

Where you and Satoru found comfort in each other after the accident happened.

Chapter 1: Hate.

You were in love.

To you, Getou Suguru was the bright moon in your dark sky.

Long and silky black hair, sly yet serious dark eyes and the soothing voice of reason, drowned your thoughts almost every day. He was really in every thought and dream you could have and you didn’t mind.

He always looked at you with a sweet smile adorning his features, raising his hand and waving it at you whenever you walked into the room. The sound of your name slipping through his lips made you realise you did like your name, but only when it came from him. The faint touch of his hand on your shoulder that sent shivers down your spine, face heating up reflexively as he leaned down to your ear to say some silly joke about Yaga.

Even to this day, you could still feel the ghost of his breathing in your neck.

Getou Suguru made you feel welcomed, and you loved him for that. You deeply loved him.

You knew you weren’t the only one who had their heart squeeze with adoration whenever Suguru came into view. He was just better at hiding it, an expert in sweeping his emotions under a rug and masking them with a cocky smile. But not for your observant eyes.

Gojo Satoru was also in love.

To Satoru, Getou Suguru was equal to him. The strongest sorcerers. He was also an annoyance.

Contrary ideals and constant bickering never failed to appear when these two were put together. They seemed so different: white and black; water and oil; the sun and the moon. Yet they always found themselves with each other.

Satoru hated the way Suguru could look through him so easily, calling him out on his bullshit whenever he was getting out of hand. Satoru didn’t mind as long as it was him and only him. The way they could almost read each other’s minds as if they were connected, only needing one look from the other to completely understand what were they thinking. The memory of Suguru still made Satoru’s stomach fill with butterflies, recalling the first time he saw his best friend through the eyes of a person in love.

Getou Suguru made Satoru feel everything he didn’t want to feel, and he became his one and only since the beginning.

You were both in love with Getou Suguru, but never admitted it. Not to him, not to each other, not to anybody. Everyone was oblivious to the way you indirectly fought against Satoru over the black haired sorcerer’s attention.

But then, it all came to an abrupt stop and everything shattered into a million pieces. It came as quickly as an unexpected projectile to both of your stomach’s guts.

“Getou Suguru is now to be executed on sight as a curse user.”

And you tried your best to stop the tears from coming and forget. Forget his sweet smile, his soothing voice, his touch and everything he made you feel. And Satoru did too. Because Getou Suguru was now a criminal. A murderer.

You wished it was all just a bad dream, that the charges against Suguru were just a complex plan from another terrorist group. Hope was something that you didn’t believe in and right now it looked like the sweetest of options. Ignorance is bliss after all.

Until Satoru came one day after an apparent encounter with Suguru thanks to Shoko’s aid. It was all true. You still remember the tremble in Satoru’s voice confirming every single event that was described in the announcement. His parents, the village, the hatred against humans. It was all real and, sadly, everything was clear now.

Getou Suguru was no longer the one you both knew and loved.

You also remember the discussion you had with Satoru after everyone left the room, asking him why he didn’t stop him, why he didn’t do anything to bring Suguru back to the school just like everyone expected him to.

“Would you have been able to do it?!” His yelling made you jolt before you looked at him with regret as his cold blue eyes showed his true and raw emotions for once.

And you knew. You knew that question had a deeper meaning than it appeared. And you also knew Satoru was well aware of your own feelings towards Suguru when his eyes looked through all the barriers you built to hide the pain you were in. To hide your love and broken heart. You could almost see his own dispair deep within himself. It was just too much and you couldn’t help but look down at your own feet through your tears.

Turns out you weren’t the only one with observant eyes.

“No.”

After that day, you and Satoru never exchanged words that weren’t about the students or the missions you were given through those months. You also never talked about the not-so-hidden feelings you both had towards the sorcerer that was once your friend and acquaintance.

It didn’t get better either but, somehow, it wasn’t worse than those days.

The memories of his smile still haunted you and your heart still felt as broken as that damned day. But at least you hadn’t heard of him for a long time. None of you had.

Satoru seemed to had forgotten completely. Or that was what he wanted to show. You knew he was as broken—or even more—than you were. How could he deem himself the strongest when he couldn’t save his one true friend and love after all. However, Satoru was sperfect at everything, even hiding the pain.

And everything did look better for you and Satoru in the path of forgetting Suguru. And, just like last time, destiny just couldn’t leave you alone.

Getou Suguru was back.

The way your body petrified under his gaze when he was finally in front of you after a long time was pathetic. You couldn’t move even if you wanted to, mouth slightly parted in an attempt to call him out for the first time in what felt forever. Was it fear? Was it shock? You didn’t know.

What you did know is he was the same Suguru but different. His smile wasn’t sweet anymore and his hair was longer. But the way he said your name still made your heart flutter in adoration and yearning for him.

No. No, this can’t be.

No, no, no. Getou Suguru was a criminal. A curse user. You had to stop him. You had to do something, anything!

Move.

Flashes of Suguru’s touch came into your mind as he walked towards you, calmly and confident as you stood there, a trembling hand trying to make its way to fight. Suguru didn’t stop.

Move.

Satoru’s words during your discussion resonated in your mind over and over again. Are you able to stop him? To risk it all and kill him if needed? Your hand stopped.

Move!

But you couldn’t. Not when he placed his hand on your shoulder, thanking you for not putting up a fight. Not when he walked past you, his familiar scent filling your nostrils for a brief second. And certainly not when he spoke from behind you, telling you how much he’d missed you.

You almost felt like laughing. You were truly pathetic.

Pathetic for not forgetting him. For thinking that, maybe after all this time, you would’ve been able to stop Suguru if the chance presented in front of your eyes. Unlike Satoru who couldn’t do it.

Oh, how wrong you were.

You crumbled down to your knees, hands holding your aching head as tears filled your eyes and memories of Suguru came to your mind. You weren’t strong at all. You could hear the rumbling far from your spot now, announcing the start of a fight.

Time passed, slow or fast, you didn’t know. But the tingling sensation of Suguru’s touch on your shoulder lingered until everything was silent once again.

It wasn’t until Satoru was next to you, that you finally got out of your stance of shock, looking up at him and his bandage-covered face. His demeanour was different once again, even if you couldn’t see his eyes, you could sense something was off, something happened just like that day.

Satoru didn’t even make the effort to face you as you stood up, still slightly shaking for the past event. He couldn’t. He didn’t know how to break the news for you because, once again, he couldn’t save Suguru. And this time, forever. His heart felt heavier than ever, his hands clenched into fists as he tried his best not to show how he was also shaking.

God, how Satoru wished that everything was different.

When you finally came to his senses, Satoru finally faced you, a small smile appearing in his face. His mask, you thought. His mask was crumbling in front of your eyes and he still tried to hide it. How cynical. Your eye twitched with annoyance as you saw right through him.

“Let’s go! The higher ups are wa—“

“He’s dead.” You cut him off and Satoru’s smile dropped, staring at you.

It wasn’t a question nor did you hesitate when those words came out of your mouth. You didn’t need him to confirm your statement as he once again faced away and the sound of the wind filled your ears.

Satoru could almost hear the sound of both of your hearts breaking even more, this time, until dust was the only thing remaining.

You didn’t have any more tears to cry as you grew tired of Satoru’s silence, taking it as the answer you weren’t even expecting before walking in front of him towards your next destination, leaving him behind. You disliked him more than ever right now.

Satoru limited himself to stare at your figure getting further away, jaw clenching with anger. Anger directed at you and himself. How could you look right through him? Did you even care about Suguru’s death as much as he cared? Did you even love him as much as he loved him?

That day, Satoru decided he hated you.

[mingishoe]

Summary: You and Wooyoung have been friends for as long as you can remember. After an unfortunate event, the two of you decided to make a safe word for when you feel uncomfortable or want out of a situation. Cinnamon. You just happen to say it on your wedding day.

Genre: Fluff, Smut, Angst! hits of crack

Pairing: Wooyoung x Fem!Reader ft. Seonghwa x reader

Word count: 15.1k 

Warning: infidelity?/cheating I do not encourage cheating, please don’t cheat :)

Smut Warnings: Dom!Wooyoung Sub!Reader, lots of dirty talk, teasing, unintentional edging, oral (m&f receiving), unprotected sex, fingering, hand job, marking

A/N: ik this is like an oLD trend,, I wrote this back in may and never finished it but I reread it and decided I liked it too much not to post so here it is :)

also please don’t make fun of my header it sucks bc idk how to make them sjkdhsks

⋆ ⋆ ⋆

You honestly don’t remember when you met Wooyoung, you just know that he’s always been your best friend.

You were 3 and Wooyoung was 4. You were just starting to be able to put your sentences together and make some sort of sense, and Wooyoung had already pretty much figured it out.

The two of you never did much talking, you just always sat together and played. Wooyoung was just a comfortable presence until you finally started grade school.

You were 6 and Wooyoung was 7 and it was probably the scariest thing that either of you have experienced at that time. Wooyoung’s mom drove the two of you to your first day of the 1st grade.

Your eyes were watery as you got out of the car with Wooyoung and his mom. She walked the two of you into your class and hugged the both of you goodbye.

Wooyoung sat next to you and watched as a tear fell down your cheek. He was only 7, he didn’t know how to comfort anyone but he tried. Wooyoung brought you into a hug that most 6 year old girls would hate because boys have cooties. Even you thought boys had cooties, but not Wooyoung. Wooyoung was cootie free.

Wooyoung gave you the tightest hug, “It’s okay y/n! I promise I’ll be next to you the whole time,” and he kept that promise.

Wooyoung was next to you all day, through the first introductions, making sure to help you if you got shy, “And this is my best friend y/n! She’s shy right now.” To snack time when you shared your fruit gummies with him just because you knew they were his favourite. Even at nap time Wooyoung made sure he was close to you even when you were supposed to be separated.

That day was the first time you knew you were sticking with Wooyoung for forever.

Every day you spent the entire day with Wooyoung, slowly making more friends. Most of your friends were boys, San, Yeosang, Mingi, and Yunho. You being the only girl in your friend group was wild. You developed basically what was a boy personality, you were always playing outside with them, in sports, and don’t even get started on your humour. You had the humour of a 10 year old boy and that would never go away.

One day your class was in the playground and Wooyoung was trying to push you on the swing. One of Wooyoung’s friends, Jisoo, came over and asked Wooyoung to go on the slides with him.

You shrugged and went over to San and watched as he struggled on the money bars, “Sannie! You’re not strong enough!” San pouted at you as he jumped down from only the very first bar, “I am! I just… have a scratch on my hand so it hurts.” You laughed at sans excuses before he pulled you to the slides, “Come on! Let’s race on the slides!”

Wooyoung was at the top of the little castle the play set was supposed to look like with Jisoo. She had Wooyoung practically cornered as she spoke to him, “Wooyoung, since you’re my boyfriend we have to kiss.”

Wooyoung didn’t remember having a girlfriend. He was pretty sure she never even asked him to be her boyfriend, “I’m not your boyfriend.” Wooyoung very simply told her.

Everyone knows how these elementary school relationships work, if someone says you’re dating, you’re dating. It’s not always that both parties agree.

She obviously didn’t care that Wooyoung didn’t want to be her boyfriend. “Well, now you are.” Wooyoung shook his head, still disagreeing, “Why not?” Wooyoung looked around trying to find you and when he did he pointed in your direction, “Because y/n is my girlfriend.” And he wasn’t wrong, you were his friend that was a girl, his girlfriend.

Wooyoung and Jisoo both watched as you came up the stairs with San, “y/n, is it true that you’re Wooyoung’s girlfriend?”

You blink at both Wooyoung and Jisoo, “What?” You look at Wooyoung who’s nodding at you, “Yeah, Wooyoung is my boyfriend.”

Jisoo looks at you with a scowl before sliding down the slide. Wooyoung looks relieved as Jisoo leaves, “You just saved my life.” You roll your eyes and laugh at Wooyoung, “We need a code word in case this happens again.”

You nod then turn to san, “San you need to leave, you can’t hear the code word.” San makes a fuss but finally agrees after you tell him you’ll give him your gummies tomorrow at lunch.

You sit down with Wooyoung in front of you making sure no one else is around you, “What should the word be?”

The both of you sit and think for a few seconds before Wooyoung speaks up, “Umm… what about clouds?” You shake your head, “I don’t think so, we talk about clouds a lot.”

Wooyoung nods, “You’re right, what about pomegranate?” Once again you shake your head, “I’m never going to remember that.” Wooyoung frowns but nods. You speak up again, “What about cinnamon?”

Wooyoung looks at you like you just said the smartest thing ever, “Yes! That’s perfect!” The two of you high five with a laugh, “Race you down the slide!” Wooyoung said before quickly jumping down to get on the slide.

⋆

Day after day you spent with those 5 boys, with Wooyoung. You and Wooyoung had sleepovers every single night, on school nights, weekends, and even in summer. It was never a problem until you got to high school.

Don’t think that middle school was easy breezy covergirl. There were always stares as you walked with Wooyoung or any of the other boys for that matter. You honestly really weren’t sure why, like yeah they were all extremely attractive but it wasn’t anything to be petty over.

All the boys were constantly being approached by different girls since middle school started and it didn’t stop in high school or in college. You never got approached by any boys because of the ones that constantly surrounded you.

Any boy you talked to got scared away by either Wooyoung or one of the other boys. Any girl that liked one of the boys always tried to threaten you, like you even cared at all.

You hadn’t ever had a boyfriend and honestly you didn’t really mind contrary to others opinions. Some of your other friends had tried to tell you it was all Wooyoung’s fault and in all honesty it was but you didn’t mind. You had Wooyoung so you were okay.

One of the things that always stuck besides your friendship with Wooyoung and the other boys was the safe word.

After another uncomfortable incident that happened in 6th grade you changed the code word to a safe word. So every time you were wanting to get out of a situation or felt uncomfortable all you had to do was either say or text the word ‘cinnamon’ to Wooyoung. You two were still to this day the only people who knew what that meant.

It was a few weeks before prom and the bell had just rung. You were waiting for Wooyoung at your locker so you could leave together. You were leaning against your locker scrolling through your social media when you sense a presence in front of you.

When you look up your heart stops in your chest, “Hello princess,” you look around for Wooyoung before looking back to the boy standing in front of you, “S-Seonghwa, Hi.”

You’re quick to find Wooyoung’s contact and type a single word, “cinnamon” and press send. It was senior year and you were all 18, and Seonghwa had been trying to get into your pants for the longest time.

Seonghwa and Wooyoung were both known to absolutely hate each other, and it’s all because of you. Everyone knows that Wooyoung is extremely protective of you but Seonghwa doesn’t seem to care. He also doesn’t seem to get the hint that you're not necessarily his biggest fan.

You put your phone in your pocket after you see Wooyoung’s name flash on the screen signalling he was coming. “Where’s your little boyfriend?” Seonghwa teases you as he places one of his arms on the lockers next to you.

You press yourself against the locker trying to get away from Seonghwa, “H-He’s not my boyfriend… but uhh, he’s not here.”

Seonghwa smirks at you before pulling away slightly, “Perfect, he’s finally not up your ass.” You start to say something before Seonghwa stops you, “anyway, I haven’t had a chance to ask you because you’re always with someone and your friends aren’t necessarily my biggest fans…” you look at Seonghwa with red cheeks that match his, “You’re blushing.” Seonghwa’s mouth drops slightly in shock, “Shut up, let me ask the question.” You smile at Seonghwa as he continues, “D-Do you want to go to prom with me?”

This time your heart stops for a different reason. You definitely didn’t expect that. You look up at Seonghwa with cheeks that honestly rivalled his, “Seonghwa… I-”

“No, she doesn’t.” Wooyoung spoke up causing Seonghwa to look down with even redder cheeks. Wooyoung grabbed your hand pulling you away from Seonghwa before you could even say sorry.

“Wooyoung, what’re you doing?!” Wooyoung stopped you in the middle of the hall, “What do you mean? You sent the word!” You looked down awkwardly, “M-Maybe I said it a little too early…”

Wooyoung stood there with his mouth slightly open, “So you’re saying that you were gonna say yes to Seonghwa?” You pout at Wooyoung, “I don’t- I don’t know?”

“But y/n, you know exactly what he wants.” Wooyoung was right, you knew that probably all Seonghwa wanted to do was finally get into your pants. But you weren’t sure, what if there was that slim possibility that he actually truly just wanted to take you to prom, “You can go to prom with us, you know that.”

You nod at Wooyoung, “I know but you all have dates…” Wooyoung sensed your disappointment and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, “I don’t have a date,”

You looked to Wooyoung as the two of you walked to his car, “Really? You’ve been asked by approximately half of the school.”

Wooyoung rolls his eyes and pushes you making you laugh, “Yeah but that doesn’t mean I wanna go with any of them.” You nibble on your lip in thought, “Maybe you should.”

Wooyoung looks at you with furrowed eyebrows, “What do you mean?” You huff as you get into Wooyoung’s car, “Maybe you should go somewhere with someone who isn’t me for once…”

Wooyoung doesn’t know how he should take that. He can’t tell if you’re actually being sincere, jealous, or if you’re just finally getting sick of him, “Do you not want to go with me?”

You sighed as you grabbed onto Wooyoung’s hand, “Wooyoungie, you know that’s not what I’m saying. I just think that maybe you should just… I dunno, give someone else a chance. Plus you know parties aren’t my scene.” You can tell Wooyoung is hurt by what you said but he’s trying to play it off as he doesn’t care.

Once you arrived at your house Wooyoung unlocked your door and waited for you to get out, “Are you not gonna come in?” Wooyoung shook his head without even looking at you, “I have to help my mom with something, tell your mom I said hi. I’ll pick you up tomorrow morning.”

You stayed looking at Wooyoung for a second before stepping out, “Oh… okay. Love you, see you tomorrow.” Wooyoung mumbled an ‘I love you’ before driving off.

You know you shouldn’t really be too affected by Wooyoung right now knowing that he’s upset but that doesn’t stop you from biting your lip in worry.

You open the door and see your mom in the kitchen, “Hey honey, hey Woo.” You pout as your mom unconsciously says Wooyoung’s name because he always comes home with you, “Wooyoung didn’t get off…”

Your mom looks up and immediately knows something’s off, “What happened?” You just shrug and sit at the stool next to where your mom is cutting vegetables, “He got mad at me.”

Your mom laughs softly knowing that it probably wasn’t even a big deal, “Wooyoung got mad because I told him that I didn’t wanna go to prom with him.”

Her eyebrows shoot up “Why don’t you wanna go to prom with him?” You just shrug, “It isn’t that I don’t want to go with him, I just don’t wanna go in general. So I told him that he should go with someone else… because somewhere close to 30 other girls asked him and he rejected them. I told him that he should give someone else an opportunity.”

Your mom looks conflicted. Well shit- that means that what you did was probably terrible and actually really mean. “Y/n sweetheart, Wooyoung rejected the other girls because he wanted to go with you. It’s not like he feels it’s a requirement, you know what I mean?”

You rest your head on the counter, “So you’re saying I should go to prom with Wooyoung?” Your mom shakes her head, “Not if you don’t want to, I’m just saying not to think that Wooyoung thinks he has to.”

“Someone asked me to prom…” your mom's head snapped up to look at you, “Really?! Who was it?” You laugh loudly before responding, “You know that boy that Wooyoung talks about all the time?” This time your mom’s jaw drops, “That boy umm… Seong- something? You know I’m not good with names,”

You nod vigorously as your mom is having a heart attack at what you’re saying, “Yes! Seonghwa! But he asked me today after school… and it was kinda cute? I’ve never seen him so flustered before. His cheeks were so red and he just looked really cute. But I don’t know, like I said I don’t even want to go at all.” You almost leave it at that but make sure to mention the obvious, “but Wooyoung would kill the both of us so that’s a no go.”

Your mom winks at you before leaning in to whisper, “Sometimes you need that adrenaline… just don’t let Wooyoung find out.” You pull away from your mom with a gasp, “You did not just betray Wooyoung like that!” Your mom just shrugs with a laugh.

The next day Wooyoung is really distant and is just pretty much ignoring you. Everyone else notices the shift in your energy making them pretty uncomfortable, “Y/n, what the fuck is happening?”

You look at San for a moment before simply saying, “Wooyoung’s mad at me.” Before San can even ask you why, you walk away and go to your class.

Thankfully that class has pretty much no one that you’re friends with so you’re free of any interrogation. You notice that Seonghwa is in this class so you decide to sit next to him, “H-Hey Seonghwa, sorry about yesterday…”

Seonghwa looks up from his phone to see you sitting next to him making him sit up straight, “Oh, Umm no it’s okay. I can handle rejection…” for some reason that made you feel really sad, “It’s not that I don’t want to go with you, I just don’t want to go in general.”

Seonghwa is looking down at his hands with his lip in between his teeth and your heart literally breaks, “You can just say you’re going with Wooyoung, it’s okay.”

“I-I’m not going with Wooyoung either…” This makes Seonghwa look at you, “Y-You’re not?” You shake your head with a soft smile, “I told you,”

You laugh as Seonghwa visibly perks up. You thought about what your mom had previously told you, “Why don’t you give me your number and maybe we can do something else?”

Seonghwa freezes, obviously not expecting you to ask for his number, “What about Wooyoung? Won’t he like murder you?” You laugh and nod, “Let’s just not let him find out… our secret.” You have your phone held out to him waiting for him to take it. He looks at you cautiously before deciding you were being serious, “Y/n, Wooyoung is going to murder me and send my balls to my mother if he sees my number in your phone.”

You pause for a minute, that being way too specific for Wooyoung to not have said that to Seonghwa, “Uhh… right.” You grabbed your phone from his hand and sent him a smiley face so he would have your number. Before you had a chance to say anything else your teacher walked in starting the class.

You and Seonghwa sat comfortably next to each other, not as awkward as you thought it was going to be.

When class ended Seonghwa walked out with you and you looked around you hoping that Wooyoung wasn’t there. You stopped yourself and looked up at Seonghwa, “Let’s start over yeah? Let’s just forget about Wooyoung and the other boys and not worry about them.”

Seonghwa smiled and nodded but still looked around like he was nervous making you laugh, “See you later,”

The rest of your classes were insanely awkward. Wooyoung still sat next to you and in all honesty it probably would’ve been better if he didn’t. The concerned glances of San and Yunho were becoming too much once it reached lunch time.

Both you and Wooyoung were mindlessly poking at your food and Yeosang was getting sick of it, “What the fuck is y’all’s problem?”

You drop your fork and look at Yeosang, “It’s none of your business.” Wooyoung rolls his eyes at you before snapping, “She doesn’t wanna go to prom with me.”

It was your turn to roll your eyes, “Wooyoung I already told you, I just don’t want to go! It has nothing to do with you!” Yeosang already regretted asking.

“Oh okay but you were going to say yes when Seonghwa asked you?” You froze. Yeosang froze. Everyone at the table froze except Wooyoung, if this was a cartoon there’d surely be steam coming out of his ears.

“What the fuck is your problem?!” You can see the veins sticking out on Wooyoung’s neck as his face turns red from anger, “You know exactly what my problem is and you know exactly why Seonghwa wants to take you to prom! He just wants to fuck you and then he’s gonna leave you.”

That was it. You pushed your tray of food at Wooyoung making it spill all over him, “Fuck you.” You’ve never wanted to hit Wooyoung as much as you do in this moment but you knew that it would hurt the both of you even more, so you contained yourself and just walked out of the cafeteria.

Wooyoung sat completely frozen. Everyone was completely shocked at your reaction. They’ve honestly never seen you this angry in the 12 years they’ve been your friend.

“Wooyoung I don’t know what your problem is but you need to fix it.” San stood up and followed you out of the cafeteria so he could make sure you were okay.

He went out the back doors of the school and walked some distance to the line of trees behind the school, that’s where you normally went if you skipped class or were wanting time to yourself.

“Y/n?” You didn’t look towards him opting to continue to text Seonghwa. You don’t even bother turning your phone off when San sits next to you, “Since when are you and Seonghwa all buddy buddy?”

You look at San with pleading eyes, “Please don’t.” San wrapped his arm around you letting you rest your head on his shoulder, “I’m not gonna say anything love, I’m just curious.”

You shrug as you further lean into San, “Just the other day when he asked me to prom, like Wooyoung said. I just- I just don’t know why he got so upset you know? I wasn’t going to say yes but that doesn’t mean he can’t let me deal with it by myself?”

San nods, “You know how protective he is over you, he loves you too much to see you get hurt.” You whisper this last part so quietly that almost San doesn’t hear you, “What if I want to?”

⋆

It was finally the night of prom and Wooyoung was still pissed at you. It's been weeks and you were honestly over it at this point so you didn’t even bother messing with him.

You and Seonghwa have gotten closer, he’s taken you out to eat a few times and you’re constantly texting. You honestly really enjoy his company and may you even go as far to say you like him.

While everyone else is at prom you’re laying in bed with your mom watching whatever’s on. Your phone buzzes and you see Seonghwa’s name. You look to your mom with a guilty look before opening the message,

Seonghwa:): You’re lucky you decided not to come to prom, it’s the most boring party I’ve ever gone to. No one has even spiked the punch yet.

Your mom snorts from beside you, “They still spike the punch?” You laugh and nod, “They do a little more than spike these days…”

Your mom watches as your thumbs hover over the keyboard, “Why don’t you invite him over?” Your eyes widen, “You’re really just betraying Wooyoung up and down these days aren’t you?” But you just shrug and send him a message back.

You: Why don’t you come over?

Seonghwa looks up from the wall he’s leaning against and sees Wooyoung and the rest of your friends sitting at a table looking awfully tense and awkward.

He watched as Wooyoung took a swig from a vodka bottle that he got from god knows where before deciding that he was going to take up on your offer.

Seonghwa stood outside your door for a solid two minutes trying to decide if he should knock or just go home. He doesn’t have a chance to do either before you open the door and look at him in amusement, “You’ve been standing out here for a while… do you wanna come in or not?”

Seonghwa walks in front of you as you close the door. Your mom is watching him in amusement as he looks down with red cheeks, “This is Seonghwa? Like Seonghwa Seonghwa?”

You bite your lip to keep you from laughing, “Yes mom. Seonghwa Seonghwa.” You eye her in warning before she says what you know she wants to, “Anyway, we’re going to my room, if you need anything just call me.”

“Prove that Wooyoung is wrong, Seonghwa” Your head snaps toward your mom with wide eyes, “I’m just kidding, go on.”

Your mom shooed the two of you off as she was too busy laughing.

“S-She’s just joking.” Seonghwa rubs his neck awkwardly, “Wooyoung told your mom about me.” You nod as you open the door to your room and let him go in, “I’d like to say it was all good things but…”

Seonghwa stops to look at your room, “I don’t know why but I didn’t expect your room to be so… cute.” You squealed as you jumped on your bed to cover up the stuffed animals that were sitting there.

Seonghwa grabbed one of your teddy bears and held it as he laid down next to you, “Do you not wanna change?” Seonghwa looked down seemingly like he forgot he was still in his suit, “I don’t have anything to change into…”

You thought for a minute before speaking up, “If it isn’t weird… one of the boys’ clothes will fit you.”

Seonghwa thought for a minute before nodding and standing up, still holding your teddy bear. You smile as he’s hugging the bear, “Looks like you like Mr.B.”

While you're going through your drawers you hear Seonghwa giggle, full on giggle, “You name your stuffed animals?” You pout as you hand Seonghwa a shirt with a pair of sweats, “Here, you can just change here.”

“Okay but don’t look, you aren’t ready for the sexy that I am shirtless.” You raise your eyebrows at Seonghwa with a smirk, “Seonghwa sweetheart, I’m friends with nothing but boys, I’ve seen abs before.”

Seonghwa looks at you expectantly before throwing Mr.B at you making you squeal. You cover your eyes with your hands as you hear him shuffling. You feel something being thrown down at your feet and you get the sudden urge to look.

You slowly separate your fingers and look at Seonghwa with your lip in between your teeth. You inhale sharply when Seonghwa makes eye contact with you as he’s undoing his belt.

Your cheeks are burning as you make no move to look away. Seonghwa doesn’t break eye contact as he pulls his belt through the loops. You whine as you turn over to put your head in the pillows while flailing your legs. You can practically feel the amusement dripping off of Seonghwa. Thankfully he ignored it and laid back down next to you.

Seonghwa was facing you as you were still whining with your head stuffed in the pillow. Seonghwa tapped on your shoulder making you look at him, “You’re really cute.”

You look away with a small smile, “Look at me princess.” You bite your lip as you look back at Seonghwa but you can still hear Wooyoung nagging at the back of your mind.

“Hwa… can I ask you a question?” Seonghwa nods while never looking away from your eyes, “Y-You don’t just want to… f-fuck me and then leave me, right?”

Seonghwa’s eyes flash what you can only express as anger, “Who told you that?” From the tone of Seonghwa’s voice you immediately knew that Wooyoung was lying. From your silence Seonghwa already knew the answer to his question, “It was Wooyoung, wasn’t it?” You pause before nodding carefully.

“Look, I don’t know what Wooyoung told you but that’s not true. Wooyoung- Never mind…” you shake your head, “N-No what?” Seonghwa bites his lip contemplating if he should actually say it, “Wooyoung knows that I l-like you… and I guess he didn’t want you to know so he said that.”

Your mouth parts slightly as you took in what Seonghwa just told you, “You like me? Like, like like me?” Seonghwa looks at you with a smile, “Yeah, like like.”

You just realised that what Wooyoung told you was a complete lie, “W-Wait! So you’ve liked me for three years?” Seonghwa nods sadly before wrapping his arms around you and hiding his face in your neck.

You carefully bring your hand up to run your hand through his hair. You feel a sudden urge of confidence and you pull Seonghwa’s head back to look at you before you carefully place your lips on his.

When Seonghwa doesn’t kiss you back you panic and pull away, “S-Sorry, I should’ve-” you get cut off when Seonghwa grabs your face in his hand and places his lips back on yours.

You pull away with a small whine as you place your head in Seonghwa’s chest and the two of you stay like that for what felt like forever. Seonghwa held you as you started to fall asleep in his arms.

The two of you were asleep for maybe 30 minutes when you woke up to your mom talking to someone. Your phone started to ring and you answered it with a tired ‘yeah?’ It was your mom, “Hide him. Tell Seonghwa to hide- like now.”

You didn’t even ask why before you started hitting Seonghwa’s chest frantically and telling him to go inside your closet. He almost falls on the floor but successfully makes it into the closest in time for your door to swing open.

Your eyes widen when you see Wooyoung walk into your room. You immediately look to Seonghwa not knowing what to do. The door to your closet is partially closed, only open enough for Seonghwa to see out.

“Wooyoung what do you want?” Wooyoung went to sit on your bed with heavy eyes, “I’m here to say sorry.” You would take his apology any other day but he’s clearly drunk right now, “Wooyoung, you’re drunk.”

“But that doesn’t mean I’m not sorry. I overreacted.” You kept looking to the closet making Wooyoung turn around in suspicion, “What’re you looking at?” You pull Wooyoung's face to look at you and you press your lips to his.

You honestly surprised yourself but you moved your hand to the direction of the closet and signalled Seonghwa to go. Seonghwa stepped out of the closet but stopped in the middle when he saw you kissing Wooyoung.

You pulled away and Wooyoung was looking at you with eyes the size of disks. You widen your eyes at Seonghwa and try to tell him to go but he points at his clothes on your bed. Shit.

Once again Wooyoung tries to look behind you making you pull him in once again. You kicked Seonghwa’s clothes off the bed and just signaled for him to go and this time he actually did. Once you made sure he was at least in the kitchen you pulled away from Wooyoung.

You quickly get up and kick Seonghwa’s clothes underneath your bed before going in your drawer and handing Wooyoung some clothes, “Here, just change and I’ll get you some water.”

When you closed the door to your room you almost had a heart attack. Seonghwa was in the kitchen talking to your mom and you walked up to them with the reddest cheeks, “S-Seonghwa, I’m sorry… I just- I just couldn’t let him see you. Maybe you can come over tomorrow or something?” Seonghwa nodded and gave you a hug before walking out.

Once you made sure Seonghwa walked out you sighed and almost started crying, “Mom, I like him.” Your mom looked at you like you were stupid, “And?” You looked to your room where Wooyoung was, “Wooyoung doesn’t like him. But he lied about Seonghwa so…” her mouth dropped open as you continued, “Andimaybejustkissedwooyoung but it was so Seonghwa could leave without being seen.”

You quickly grabbed Wooyoung a bottle of water and ran back to your room before your mom could say something. You were glad you and your mom were really close but you still couldn’t handle certain things she said to you.

When you reentered your room Wooyoung was sitting on your bed with the cutest pout, “What’s wrong Woo?”

“Who’s car just left?” You froze with your mouth wide open, “My mom… had a friend over…” Wooyoung nods but then his eyebrows furrow, “I didn’t see them?” You shook your head, “You're drunk Wooyoung.” You hand him the water and he drinks the entire thing like he found water in the desert.

“You need to sleep. Come on, let’s cuddle yeah?” Wooyoung smiles as you wrap your arms around him when you lay next to him.

His eyes never leave yours as he whispers, “I love you.” This time it felt different though. Your heart starts to beat faster as Wooyoung looks at you with loving eyes, “I love you.” Wooyoung shakes his head, “No you don’t, not the same way.”

Your heart almost exploded, “W-Wooyoung your drunk, don’t say things like that.”

Wooyoung grabbed your hand and started playing with your fingers, “But I’m sober enough to know what I’m saying y/n.”

“I-It’s late Woo, you should get some rest.” Before Wooyoung could continue anything he was going to say you turned and faced your back to him with your eyes squeezed shut. What the fuck are you supposed to do? You like Seonghwa but if Wooyoung isn’t just drunk and saying stuff you don’t want to hurt him.

Whenever you woke up Wooyoung was gone. You honestly didn’t know how he managed to get up and leave with a hangover and not wake you up.

You got up and went to the kitten to see your mom looking the most conflicted you’ve ever seen her, “What?” You looked at her with suspicion not knowing what she was going to do.

Once your mom sees you she shakes her head and pretends like whatever just happened didn’t happen, “Wooyoung just left…”

Your eyebrows shot up, “You let him leave?”

“Why not?” Your mom looked at you with furrowed eyebrows making you pout “Because he’s hungover and he can’t drive like that…”

She shakes her head, “He's fine… What about Seonghwa? Are you going to invite him over?”

⋆

After that day you never once brought up Wooyoung’s drunken words, your kiss, or the lie about Seonghwa, too scared that it would ruin your friendship but you had the hunch that it was already falling apart. Everything had been different since that day and you’re not sure in what way. There were lingering stares and touches that made your hearts race a little bit faster.

After a couple of months you and Seonghwa ended up dating and let’s just say when you announced it, it wasn’t pretty. Wooyoung threw what would be best described as a hissy fit and the rest of the boys thought you were joking.

Once they realised you were being serious they all supported you, even Wooyoung. It took Wooyoung the longest though. He ignored you for what felt like forever before San finally convinced him to get over himself.

You all continued to be friends in college, going to the same school. After a while they were finally warming up to Seonghwa and actually thought he was cool which meant a lot to the both of you.

Let’s just say Seonghwa didn’t want to fuck you and leave you because he’s stuck around everytime.

It was at the 4 year mark that Seonghwa proposed to you.

It honestly shocked you way more than it did everyone else, which was saying something.

It was at your 23rd birthday party, in front of the entirety of your friends and family. For whatever reason Seonghwa decided to do it at the birthday party your family held for you, making it all the more stressful.

You were never one for PDA or doing something private and intimate in a public setting or in front of people, so when you saw Seonghwa go down on his knee you almost told him to get up.

Everyone else was either crying or screaming and the only thing you managed to do was look at Wooyoung with wide eyes. You watched as Wooyoung shut his eyes before pushing through the people to leave. You wanted to follow him, you really did but with Seonghwa staring at you with his eyes shining brighter than ever you just couldn’t.

“Will you marry me?” Your eyes started watering and before you knew it you were crying.

The one word completely changed everything so fast it almost gave you whiplash, “Yes.”

The cheers got louder and more tears fell when you wrapped your arms around Seonghwa but it just didn’t feel right. Once everyone calmed down a little bit you went to San, “Where did Wooyoung go?”

He glanced at the ring around your finger with sad eyes, “I think just to the front… I dunno.”

You saw Wooyoung sitting under the big tree in your yard so you go sit next to him without saying anything.

You sit in silence for what felt like forever before you spoke up quietly, “I’m too young to get married aren't I?”

Wooyoung laughs with a nod, “A little bit… you’re still 23, most people wait to get married until their 30’s.”

You knew Wooyoung was right. You were still really young, you haven’t done half the things you wanted to do before you started a family.

“Remember how you always used to say you never wanted to get married? Because it felt like you were trapped?” You snort, “It is.”

Wooyoung turns to look at you with slightly teary eyes, “Then why did you say yes?”

You pause with your mouth opening and closing before you whisper, “I-I don’t know…”

A tear falls from Wooyoung’s eyes making your heart shatter, “D-Don’t leave me, please.”

Tears start leaving your eyes and now the two of you are sitting under your tree crying while looking into the others eyes, “Woo, I would never leave you. I promise.”

Wooyoung lets out a choked sob making you take his face in your hands, “Wooyoung, I love you so fucking much, you have no idea.”

Wooyoung shakes his head as more tears fall from his eyes, “N-Not the same way y/n. I love you. Now you’re engaged to fucking Seonghwa out of everyone. I spent so long keeping him away from you because I just fucking knew that something like this would happen.”

“Woo trust me. It doesn’t matter if I’m engaged to Seonghwa or not I still love you more than anyone and anything in the world.”

While you were outside Seonghwa was running around looking for you. He found San and asked where you were, “She’s outside talking to Wooyoung. I wouldn’t bother them if I were you.”

“Why? Don’t I have the right to-” san shakes his head and stops him, “Just don’t. Let them talk it out okay? If you’re so curious you can see from the window.” San and Seonghwa watch the two of you from the window.

San doesn’t look concerned in the slightest whereas Seonghwa has his eyes filled with concern, “She’s crying.” San shrugs, “So is Wooyoung, she’s fine.”

Seonghwa watches how you have Wooyoung’s face in your hands and the way the two of you are staring into each other’s eyes. He watches as Wooyoung falls into your chest and the way you hold Wooyoung. You’ve never held him like that…

You’re practically sitting on Wooyoung’s lap making Seonghwa turn to San with a confused face, “W-What is she…” San shrugs with an equally confused expression, “I have no idea.”

When Seonghwa tries to go outside San stops him, “Just- Just let them have their moment… please?” Seonghwa lets out a pained sigh as he watches the woman he’s engaged with sitting on the lap of the man who tried to keep them apart in the first place.

You had your eyes closed as Wooyoung rocked you back and forth with his arms wrapped around you tightly, too scared to let go.

You pull away slightly and rest your forehead on his just looking into each other’s eyes, “Wooyoung I’m serious. No matter what, I’m always on your side. I don’t care how much you think I love Seonghwa, I love you more okay? I won’t leave you. Ever.”

You wanted nothing more than to stay with Wooyoung and hold him and tell him that everything was going to be okay but you couldn’t. No matter how much you wanted to kiss away his tears, you just couldn’t do that to Seonghwa.

You heard a door open and close so you quickly got off of Wooyoung and wiped the tears off your face. When you looked up and saw Seonghwa you tried your best to smile at him without it seeming fake, “There you are. Come on baby, your mom wants to talk to you.”

You didn’t miss the glare Seonghwa gave Wooyoung before pulling you away. You tried to stop the trembling of your lip as Seonghwa brought you back inside with everyone. Your mom took your hand and brought you into her room.

As soon as the door was shut you let out a sob and buried your face in your hands. “Why did you say yes sweetheart?”

You let out incoherent babbles with sobs and sniffles in between, “I have no idea what you’re saying.” Your mom makes you laugh slightly and you finally look at her. You take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down before you start to speak up again.

“I truly w-wanted to say yes but not right now you know? I’m still really young and I have a feeling Seonghwa wants to get married soon and I don’t know…” your mom sighed, “He wants to get married this summer.”

Your mouth dropped open, “It’s December- Summer is in like 7 months.” Your mom nodded with an apprehensive look on her face, “What? You think I’m going to back out or something?”

Your mom doesn’t respond and changes the subject, “A beach wedding would be cute. Especially in the summer.” You really didn’t want to be having this conversation. Not so soon at least.

“Yeah… I’ll talk to Seonghwa about it.” Your mom could clearly see on your face that you didn’t want this, but it wasn’t in her place to say anything. She was confident that you would work it out.

⋆

It had only been maybe a month before Seonghwa started pressuring you to start making wedding arrangements. The two of you settled on a beach side wedding in June. Even though it was still several months away you were still extremely anxious. Everyday that passed you felt the sinking feeling in your stomach grow.

No matter how sudden, how rushed, or how short a time you have, you're going to have a cute flowy dress no matter what anyone else says. It’s too hot to have a skin tight dress or a big ball gown dress.

You had taken Wooyoung and your parents to go dress shopping with you and all of them cried when you put on the dress, Wooyoung for maybe a different reason.

It was tight from your waist up with a sweetheart neckline, making sure to show your figure perfectly. The bottom was flowy covered with pretty sparkles covering the entirety of the dress.

You remember how beautiful you looked with the headdress and veil. The way you looked to Wooyoung with teary eyes had him squeezing his eyes shut to contain himself, “D-Do you like it Woo?”

Wooyoung smiled and nodded even though you could tell he was very obviously upset, “You look beautiful.”

A month after it was time for the anticipated bachelor and bachelorette parties. Bachelorette parties are supposed to be fun right? You had practically no friends that were girls, and the ones you did have you weren’t super close with you. While Seonghwa went out with his friends for his bachelor party you asked Wooyoung to come to your place for yours.

Wooyoung was apprehensive, not knowing if he could really stay with you all night, but he decided that he wanted to spend one last night with you.

You’re not going to say it wasn’t tense or awkward because the lingering stares were too much for the both of you to handle.

You tried to put on a movie to distract from the tension but if anything it made it worse. You were too scared to say anything as Wooyoung’s eyes were glued to your lips, “W-Woo…”

“Can I kiss you?” You stayed silent for a while not knowing what to say, “Wooyoung-”

“Just once. Please.” You couldn't say no. Not when Wooyoung was looking at you the way he was.

You should’ve said no. You should’ve thought about Seonghwa and said no, but as soon as you nodded it was too late.

You felt yourself immediately become hot when Wooyoung’s lips met yours. All thoughts of Seonghwa left your mind the second he held your face in his hands.

Your heart started racing as you tilted your head to deepen the kiss. Wooyoung didn’t expect you to keep going but he definitely didn’t want it to stop.

You both knew it was wrong and you both knew you should stop before the both of you got too carried away, but that didn’t stop either of you.

You pulled away so you could catch your breath and the way Wooyoung was biting his lip made your thighs clench.

“Wooyoung, we should stop.” Wooyoung nodded but made no move to get away from you, “Y-You’re right. This is wrong.”

You nodded mindlessly as Wooyoung leaned in again. His lips met yours for the second time and this is what felt right. It felt different from kissing Seonghwa, but in a good way. You didn’t want to pull away.

Wooyoung’s tongue went to lick your lips making you gasp slightly. Wooyoung used that as an opportunity to slip his tongue in your mouth.

Your cheeks burned as the kissing sounds were the only thing able to be heard. You unconsciously moved yourself so you were on top of Wooyoung.

Wooyoung gripped your waist and pulled you closer to him before he carefully flipped the two of you so you were laying on your back.

You whimpered quietly as Wooyoung moved to attach his lips to your jaw and neck, “Woo- I-” You whimpered as Wooyoung started sucking lightly on your neck, making sure not to leave marks.

You spread your legs further to make room for Wooyoung to get in between them, “Wooyoung, Please-” Wooyoung pulls away from your neck and looks up at you with dark eyes, “Y/n… A-Are you sure? You don’t have to j-just because I want to.”

You shook your head with a whimper whenever you felt Wooyoung’s boner on your inner thigh, “I want to Wooyoung, j-just please!” Wooyoung groans as you run your hands up his back to grip onto his hair.

Your heavy breathing is the only thing that can be heard as Wooyoung lifts your shirt to grope your chest through your bra.

Wooyoung wanted to take his time with you, to make up for all the lost time. He wanted to kiss and mark every inch of your body but he knew he couldn’t, not when he knew tomorrow you were going to be back with Seonghwa.

Wooyoung knew he should stop. Wooyoung knew he should be the bigger person and put his foot down and say that it wasn’t okay. You knew it was wrong, he didn’t have to tell you that but you were too far into it to stop.

“Wooyoung stop.” Wooyoung looked up at you concerned that you changed your mind and wanted to kick him out, “Stop thinking about Seonghwa… it-it’s okay.”

You both knew it wasn’t okay but that was the only thing that could stop the guilt from taking over.

Wooyoung let out a shaky breath as he nodded and went back to pay attention to your chest. He hesitantly lifted your shirt over your head and took a minute to look at your chest.

You didn’t wait for Wooyoung and you quickly pulled your hands behind you to undo your bra. You let it fall down your arms as Wooyoung let out a groan, “F-Fuck~ you’re so pretty.”

You suck in harshly whenever Wooyoung attaches his lips around one of your nipples. Your hand moves to grip onto Wooyoung’s blonde locks as he swirls his tongue around your perky nipple.

The hand that isn’t wrapped around your waist moves to tweak your other nipple between his fingers. Once he decides he’s paid enough attention to one he switches and does the same to the other.

Your mind is clouded with nothing but lust and you can only think about having Wooyoung inside of you, “Wooyoung- please fuck me!” Wooyoung groans before pulling your shorts down, “Patience sweetheart.”

Wooyoung spreads your legs and leaves wet kisses from your ankle to just beside where you need him the most. He repeats his actions with your other leg before placing open mouthed kisses on your clothed core making your thighs close around his head lightly.

“W-Wooyoung!” Wooyoung chuckles deeply before finally sliding your now ruined panties down your legs. Wooyoung bites his lip as he sits back to take in the sight of you naked underneath him.

He slowly brings a hand down to rub his fingers through your soaked folds, “F-Fuck y/n. You’re so pretty. Too bad I can’t have you to myself…”

Wooyoung didn’t want to get into a pity party while you were naked underneath him so he experimentally rubbed your clit in small circles with his thumb making you wither underneath him, “Wooyoung please stop teasing me! Do something!”

Wooyoung honestly didn’t even realise his teasing but he complied and swiftly gripped your hips and placed his head in between your legs.

Wooyoung licked a stripe up your cunt while he tentatively watched your face, trying to engrave the smallest of expressions into his brain. Your hand reached down to grip onto Wooyoung’s locks making him groan against your core.

Your eyes had shut from the pleasure as soon as Wooyoung’s mouth had touched your dripping cunt but you wanted to see him. You forced your eyes open and you swear you almost came at the sight.

Wooyoung lifted his face from your core making a pathetic whine come from your pretty lips whenever you saw his lips and chin covered in your juices.

You bit your lip as Wooyoung made eye contact with you before wrapping his lips around your clit. You moaned loudly whenever Wooyoung had probbed at your entrance.

His two fingers slipped into your tight hole almost completely with how wet you were, “Do you hear that sweetheart?” Your face was burning as you heard the lewd squelching noises coming from your bottom half, “You’re fucking soaked. All for me.”

“Yes Wooyoung! Fuck- all for you, just for you!” Wooyoung was encouraged by your words, and your noises, so he increased the speed of his fingers inside of you.

His fingers weren’t as long as Seonghwa’s so it took him a minute to find that spot inside of you, but when he did your grip on his hair tightened.

Wooyoung smirked against you as he continued to massage the sweet spot in you making you gush juices, “Woo- pleasepleaseplease, G-Gonna cum!” He sucked harder on your clit so he could push you off the edge.

Wooyoung was insanely hard in his pajama pants, almost crossing the edge to becoming painful. Wooyoung smirked as he swiftly added a third finger, making you feel the stretch.

Your mouth dropped open into a silent moan as you came. You pulled harshly on Wooyoung’s hair but he absolutely loved it. His groans were vibrating your clit, only intensifying your orgasm.

“Fuck W-Wooyoung! Fuck me- I n-need you to fuck me!”

Wooyoung wasted no time before he quickly stripped himself of his clothing. You barely had enough time to take the sight in before Wooyoung had his cock in his hand as he ran it through your folds.

He paused making you whine, “W-Wait y/n, condom?” You shook your head and pulled Wooyoung closer to you by wrapping your legs around him, “It’s o-okay… unless you w-want to?”

“I-I mean no but S-Seong-” You groaned and shook your head knowing that if Seonghwa found the condom it would be over.

“It’s okay W-Wooyoung… please?” He took a deep breath in before he slowly pushed in. You both moaned in unison as he had bottomed out inside of you. Wooyoung was a lot bigger than Seonghwa making you feel a stretch you haven’t felt before.

Wooyoung gripped your hips tightly as he tried to contain himself. You were already so tight but the way you were clenching around his cock almost made him cum on the spot, “y-y/n wait. If you keep doing t-that, I'm gonna cum.”

You nod in agreement knowing that you were pretty much walking on the same line he was. After probably a minute too long Wooyoung hesitantly starts to pull out before slowly thrusting back into you.

You let out a choked sob as Wooyoung started to thrust shallowly into you, still determined to tease you. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as Wooyoung brought a hand down to rub softly at your already sensitive clit.

After you whined about Wooyoung teasing you again Wooyoung gave in from more of his own need than yours, he would tease you for hours if he had the time and patience.

Wooyoung’s grip on your hips tightened as he slammed his hips into you. So much for wanting to take his time with you.

“Wooyoung! Fuck- y-you fuck me so good!” Wooyoung groaned and placed his feet on the bed so he would have more leverage to fuck into you.

“Y-Yeah? Does it feel good? Does my cock feel good?” Your head spun from Wooyoung’s words.

“Fuck yes- f-feels so good!” Tears sprung in your eyes from the pleasure you were receiving, Wooyoung’s cock hitting your spot with each thrust.

“Does Seonghwa fuck you good like this? Does he fuck you the way you deserve?” You shook your head, not remembering if you’ve ever felt this good before.

“No fuck!” Wooyoung managed to chuckle at your response, “Aww poor baby, you won’t be able to get fucked properly after this. Seonghwa won’t be able to fuck you without you thinking of me. You better be careful baby because once you moan my name it’s over, then you’re gonna be running back to me so I can show you what it’s like to be fucked properly again.”

Wooyoung’s words were becoming too much for you to handle as your legs started to shake. The coil in your stomach was so close to snapping and then your phone rang.

Wooyoung immediately stopped all movements making you let out the loudest whine you’ve ever made, “Wooyoung why- fuck!”

Wooyoung looked around before grabbing your phone, “Your phone is ringing” you honestly almost started crying, “Just leave it-”

Wooyoung shook his head, “It’s Seonghwa.”

You groaned loudly as your high was slowly starting to fade. You grabbed your phone from Wooyoung’s hand and took a deep breath before you pressed the answer button, “H-Hello?”

You heard what was loud music before it got quiet, “What’re you d-doing?” You heard Seonghwa hiccup as he was speaking.

As you started to respond to Seonghwa, Wooyoung started to thrust slowly making you inhale sharply, “oh n-nothing, we’re just watching that new movie…”

You heard someone speaking in the background before grabbing the phone, “Sorry y/n, Seonghwa’s drunk. I told you Seonghwa they weren’t doing anything, have a little more faith in them would ya?” You weren’t even listening to San with Wooyoung starting to increase the speed of his thrusts.

“What?” You held the phone away from your face so they wouldn’t be able to hear your heavy breathing, “Are you sure they’re not fucking?”

Your mouth dropped open in a silent moan whenever Wooyoung started rubbing against your sweet spot, “Wh-What is he talking about?”

San yelled at Seonghwa before bringing the phone back to his ear, “Seonghwa thinks that you’re having sex with Wooyoung.” Your eyes roll to the back of your head when Wooyoung reaches down to rub your clit, “Huh? Like right now?”

You hear San laugh on the other end of the phone like he knows how ridiculous it sounds, “Yeah, anyway, sorry about that. Go ahead and continue with whatever you were doing. Bye!”

You hang up quickly and throw your phone somewhere. You wrap your legs around Wooyoung’s waist and bring him even closer to you, “Did you hear him? Seonghwa thinks we’re fucking right now… little does he know he’s never gonna be able to satisfy you again.”

Once again Wooyoung’s words started bringing you over the edge, “Imagine if he came home and saw us right now, the look on his face when he sees his pretty little wife fucking her best friend.”

Your nails dig into Wooyoung’s back as your core starts to throb around Wooyoung’s cock, “He would see how good I’m making you feel, and he would know by the way your pretty little moans sound that he’s never made you feel this good.”

Without warning the coil in your stomach finally snapped. Wooyoung’s name came out of your mouth like it was the only word you knew. The feeling of you cumming was enough to push Wooyoung off the edge of his orgasm.

Your moans got even louder when you felt Wooyoung’s hot spurts of cum cover your walls. Wooyoung’s moans and groans engraved themselves into your brain as he was right next to your ear.

Your legs were shaking even after Wooyoung had pulled out and was laying next to you. Your cheeks burned red as both you and Wooyoung’s eyes were glued to your legs.

“Has Seonghwa ever made you feel that good before?” Wooyoung asked seriously. You let out a dry laugh before looking at Wooyoung with raised eyebrows, “What did that just look… and sound like?”

Wooyoung laughed before pulling you back on top of him. One of his arms wrapped around your waist while his other hand started running its fingers through your hair, “Like a no?”

You looked up to Wooyoung with a small smile, “Yep…” you looked at the clock on your bedside table and saw that it was only just after midnight, “Woo, we need to get dressed…”

Wooyoung agrees but neither of you make any effort to actually move. Wooyoung feels you becoming heavier on top of him signaling you’re falling asleep. He knows he can’t leave you naked on the bed for Seonghwa to see you and become even more suspicious so he carefully rolls you over to your back and gets up.

He goes over to the drawers and tries to find you some underwear to put on. While he’s over there he finds a pair of shorts and a T-shirt to put on you as well.

He places the clothes on the bed and looks around to find the clothes he had just previously ripped off of you, as much as he wanted you for himself he wouldn’t hurt Seonghwa to know that he had slept with you.

Once he puts the soiled clothing in the dirty clothes he quickly puts his clothes back on so he can go dress you.

As he carefully slips your underwear on you he feels a sudden wave of guilt. He tries his best not to let Seonghwa’s voice in the back of his head get to him as he continues to dress you.

He lifts your top half up as he puts your head through the hole. You mumbled something before you placed your head in Wooyoung’s neck and wrapped your arms around him, “L-Let me see your arms sweetheart.”

You whine quietly before sticking out your arms for Wooyoung and once he succeeded in fully dressing you, you wrapped your arms around him again and pulled him on top of you.

Wooyoung smiled fondly at you when he felt your grip tighten, “Love you Woo.” His heart clenched in his chest, “I love you more sweetheart.” He loved you more than words can explain but he knows you don’t love him in the same way, you couldn’t. Not when you’re marrying Seonghwa.

Wooyoung really tried not to think about it and focused on your breathing and soon enough he fell asleep while holding you.

⋆

Wooyoung woke up to the loud ringing of his phone somewhere. He tried his best to answer before it woke you up too, “Hello?” Wooyoung couldn’t keep up with whoever was on the other end of the line, “Wait wait wait- who is this?”

The person groans, “Yeosang you idiot.” Wooyoung makes a noise of acknowledgement before telling him to continue. As Yeosang is talking, Wooyoung looks over to your sleeping form next to him.

You just look so peaceful and so beautiful that Wooyoung can’t help but groan in annoyance making Yeosang stop talking, “What?”

Wooyoung carefully gets up to go to the kitchen so he wouldn’t wake you up, “Yeosang I fucked up big time.”

Yeosang pauses and Wooyoung hears shuffling so he's assuming he’s going somewhere else, “Please don’t tell me what I think happened…”

“Are you at your place?” Yeosang sighed harshly, “San and Yunho are here too though.”

Wooyoung nodded and went back to your room to grab his bag, “It’s okay… Seonghwa?”

“Oh his way back home… so you better leave before you feel too guilty.” Wooyoung agreed and hung up. He sits down next to you and brushes the hair out of your face before kissing you gently.

Your eyes flutter open as Wooyoung is pulling away. You grab onto his face and pull him into another kiss. When you pulled away you looked at him with your lip in between your teeth, “Are you leaving?”

Wooyoung smiles sadly and nods, “Seonghwa is coming back so I think it’s best if I go…” he watches as your eyes widen in a panic before he pulls you closer to him.

“No no no it’s okay! Hey sweetheart it’s okay, it’ll be fine.” You wrap your arms around him tightly, not wanting to let go, “Please stay?”

You looked at Wooyoung with watery eyes that made him want to give you the world, “I want to baby I really do, but Seonghwa he’s gonna be here in a minute and… I don’t think we could be in the same room as him right now.”

You nodded knowing that he was right but you still don’t pull away. Wooyoung gets up making him pick you up while he’s at it. He drops your legs so you’re standing on your tippy toes, “I love you.”

Wooyoung tightens his grip on you and rests his head on your neck, “Love you.” You finally let go of him but almost immediately grab onto his face to give him one more kiss, “Y/n-”

The way you’re looking at Wooyoung makes him weak and he can’t resist when you plea, “One last time. Please?”

Wooyoung holds your face with both of his hands as he kisses you with much love he can possibly muster. You let out a soft whine making him pull away, “I-I have to go…” you nod but when you make an effort to actually sit back down your mouth drops open and makes a noise of slight pain and discomfort.

Wooyoung snores loudly at you making you glare at him, “Sore?” You nod with a pout making Wooyoung feel a wave of pride mixed with slight anxiety, what if Seonghwa notices?

“I know that look Woo. I’ll be fine, it's okay.” Wooyoung nods once again but still looks concerned, “Want me to run you a bath? It’ll help.” You consider his offer but decline knowing that he couldn’t join you even if he wanted to.

Wooyoung finally makes his way to the front door, double checking he had everything he needed. He pulls the door open right as Seonghwa is pushing it open making him jump, “Holy shit! You scared me!” Seonghwa jumped too making him hold his hand over his heart, “Are you fucking serious?!”

The both of them stand at the doorway trying to calm down from the jump scare they both just received, “So, are you leaving already?” Wooyoung opens and closes his mouth trying to find the words before nodding, “Yeah, Yeosang asked me to take them something to eat… did y’all have fun last night?”

Seonghwa looks unsure of his answer but nods anyway, “Yeah, you know how it is with the boys… what about you and y/n?” Wooyoung panics slightly but nods, “Umm yeah, we just ate some snacks and watched a few movies.”

Seonghwa nods and they both stare at each other awkwardly before Wooyoung speaks up, “S-Sorry, I gotta go… the boys, they’re waiting.” Seonghwa nods and moves out of the way for Wooyoung to walk out.

Once Seonghwa closed the door, Wooyoung let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding in. When Wooyoung got to his car he threw his head against the steering wheel and let out a loud groan.

He fucked up big time.

When Wooyoung drives to Yeosang’s place he actually stops to go get food knowing they’re probably starving… plus if Seonghwa asks he doesn’t want him to know he was lying.

When he knocks on the door, San opens it with a large smile when he sees the bags of food Wooyoung was holding.

Wooyoung doesn’t even greet san before shoving the bags of food into his hands and walking into the apartment, “I fucked up.”

Yeosang and Yunho who were sitting at the table drinking coffee looked towards him. San followed Wooyoung completely confused, “Like our order?”

“No you idiot.” Wooyoung sits at one of the empty chairs at the table before looking at Yeosang with an extremely distressed look, “We- I fucked up big time Yeosang.”

Yunho’s eyes widen when he gets an idea of what happened, “We? As in You and y/n?” Wooyoung wanted nothing more than to say no and lie but whenever he nodded all three boys in front of him exploded.

“Wooyoung are you fucking kidding me?!” San had nothing else to say knowing that you had lied straight through your teeth whenever Seonghwa had called you. But then again what did he expect you to say, ‘Yeah I’m fucking my best friend’ obviously not.

“Even after Seonghwa had called her? After she told me straight up that that didn’t happen?” Yeosang really doesn’t look surprised but Yunho on the other hand looks like he’s having a heart attack.

Wooyoung shakes his head in response to San’s question, “So before?!” Wooyoung suddenly feels an immense amount of guilt as he shakes his head again.

San looks confused for a moment before his mouth drops open, “While we were on the fucking phone Wooyoung!” Wooyoung has never wanted to lie more in his entire life but he can’t bring himself to do it so he slowly nods.

A million expressions pass through San’s face and Wooyoung can’t stand the harsh glares of his friends, “Wooyoung- they’re getting married… MARRIED WOOYOUNG!” Wooyoung scoffs at Yunho who’s looking at him like he’s trash.

“You don’t think I fucking know that? It was just a kiss Yunho a-and then I pulled away. We both said we couldn’t do it but then she kissed me again…” Their glares soften as they see as Wooyoung starts to tear up.

“And I asked her like 3 times if she wanted me to keep going and every time she said yes. I-I’m not saying it’s y/n’s fault… because I was the one that started it. And yeah I know it wasn’t a very smart decision but I- Yunho I love her so much.”

Yunho sends Wooyoung a sad smile as he continues. All the boys know how Wooyoung feels about you so in all honesty they really don’t blame either of you, “I love her so fucking much and in that moment I know she felt the same way… I just couldn’t handle it. And Yunho this morning when I told her I had to go- she kissed me again and begged me not to leave. She begged me to stay and give her kisses while we laid together but I couldn’t. I couldn’t Yunho, not when Seonghwa was on his way home to come back to his fiancé.”

Wooyoung wipes the tears that are falling whenever he finally stops talking. The three boys look between each other not knowing what to do or say, “Do you think she’s going to go through with it?” Wooyoung looked at the other boys expectantly with nothing but Hope filling his eyes.

In all honesty they really didn’t think you were, but it wasn’t their business to put out there. “You know Wooyoung… I don’t know. I really don’t know, but for now all we can do is wish the best for both of them…” San put his arm around Wooyoung, trying his best to comfort him in any way possible.

⋆

You saw Seonghwa open the door to your room with a large smile. You got up from the bed to wrap your arms around him in a big hug. You squeezed your eyes shut as you let out a shaky breath, “How was your night?”

“We had fun, believe it or not, I wasn’t the one who got the drunkest.” You laughed softly as you pulled away.

You sat back down with a slight grunt, “You alright?”

You nodded as you swallowed harshly, “I slept wrong, my back hurts.” Seonghwa nods in understanding.

He walks to the bathroom and you flop back onto the bed. You shut your eyes and cover your face with your hands as you felt like crying.

As you tried to focus on your breathing Seonghwa came out of the bathroom and pulled on your hand. You looked up at him with furrowed eyebrows, “I ran you a bath princess.”

You smile and follow Seonghwa, “I’ll let you relax alright?” You nod as he kisses you on the cheek, thankful that he doesn’t want to join you.

As soon as Seonghwa walked out you locked the door behind him and looked at yourself in the mirror. You couldn’t do this. You scanned yourself in the mirror as you took your clothes off, trying to make sure there weren’t any hickeys on you.

You carefully went to sit down in the bath with a pained expression and a groan. You soaked your body in the water and bubbles and you couldn’t stop the tears that started flowing from your eyes.

You couldn’t stop the soft sobs and the way your body shook. You needed Wooyoung.

You don’t know how long you sat there and cried but the water was now cold and your fingers were wrinkly.

You looked down and your eyes widened as you saw the bruises on your thighs and hips, “Shit Wooyoung-”

“Are you okay in there?!” Seonghwa knocked on the door and called out to you.

“Umm… yeah I’m okay! I’m getting out now!” You looked at yourself in the mirror one more time and you could tell you had been crying for who knows how long. You tighten the towel that’s wrapped around you as you walk back into your shared room to get some clothes to change into.

You made sure you grabbed a pair of sweats to cover the bruises and a random shirt. You grabbed your phone and pressed San’s contact as you walked out of the room, ignoring Seonghwa who was looking at you.

San answered your call almost immediately, “Hey my love, what’s up?”

“San cut the bullshit, I know he’s there.” San was quiet on the other line before you heard a door close.

Your breathing was shaky and you walked out of your apartment, needing to get some fresh air, “Y/n what the fuck were you thinking? You’re getting married!”

You laughed dryly, “Do you think I don’t fucking know that? I’m not oblivious to what I did.”

“You lied right through your teeth. How do you think Seonghwa would feel?” Tears started pricking at your eyes again because you know you would’ve broken Seonghwa’s heart.

You know how much Seonghwa loves you and it hurts you knowing that your love for Seonghwa isn’t as strong, “San I don’t know what to do.”

“I don’t know what you want me to do lovely… you’re getting married in a week. A week y/n. You need to decide if you’re going to call it off or not.”

You shook your head, “I can’t do that Sannie. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

You heard a sigh, “You need to talk to Seonghwa. Y/n I know you don’t want to go through with it. No matter what decision you make, it’s going to hurt Seonghwa.”

You didn’t even realise you started crying again until San started trying to comfort you, “Hey, y/n, listen to me. Everything is gonna be okay. You and Wooyoung will work it out.”

You nodded more to yourself, “Y-You’re right. Look, I got to go. Take care of Wooyoung for me.” You didn’t let San respond before you hung up the phone and shut your eyes.

You fucked up and you knew it. You were getting married in a few days and you just cheated on the man you’re getting married to.

You dragged your feet as you walked back to your apartment, wanting to take as much time as possible getting there.

Seonghwa was at the door and immediately walked to you whenever you walked back in. You stiffened as Seonghwa pulled you into a hug, “What’s wrong princess?”

“N-Nothing. It’s nothing, I’m okay.” Seonghwa pulled away and held your face in his hands. He raised his eyebrows at you, knowing that something was wrong, “I’m sorry. I’m just really stressed with everything going on.”

Seonghwa nodded in understanding, “It’s okay. I’ll take care of everything, we’ll work it out. Love you.”

“Love you.”

⋆

Your wedding day. It’s the day that should be the happiest moment of anyone’s life. You and Wooyoung haven’t seen each other since… then, but he texted you this morning making sure that you were okay.

Your mom and San and a couple other members of your family were helping you with your hair and makeup, San was just there for emotional support.

Everyone could see it in your face, you didn’t want to do this. Everyone tiptoed around you being careful not to mention Wooyoung or being married even though you were literally sitting there in your wedding dress looking out the window.

Your wedding was at the beach. It was supposed to be beautiful. There was a breeze, the ocean looked absolutely beautiful, and it was sunny.

The perfect wedding right?

San made sure you had everything you needed because you really didn’t have any motivation. You had barely finished your vows and Seonghwa had gotten his done months ago.

It was time that San had to leave and go help Seonghwa and the rest of the boys. San pulled you into a hug and you didn’t want to let go, “S-San please stay.”

“You’ll be okay darling. Just… don’t force yourself to do anything okay? You’ll know what the right decision is when you get up there.” San gave you an unconvincing smile but you nodded and took a deep breath.

San gave you a kiss on the forehead and one last hug before he went to join Seonghwa and Wooyoung.

San’s heart physically broke whenever he walked into the opposite room. He could see how happy Seonghwa looked and how Wooyoung looked like he was going to cry.

San felt so awkward but he was pained by his friends. He walked over to where the rest of the boys were, “What the fuck is going on?”

San made sure to speak quietly so neither Wooyoung or Seonghwa could hear them, “Dude there’s no way.”

“No?” Yunho looked at San with a sad smile as he shook his head.

The three boys sat there quietly as they watched Wooyoung try his best to keep a smile on his face as Seonghwa read his vows to Wooyoung. They really felt bad for Wooyoung.

Once poor Wooyoung confirmed his vows, it was time. Seonghwa stood in front of y’alls family and friends with Wooyoung next to him looking like he wanted to be anywhere but there.

If literally everyone was being honest, they didn’t think they’d actually be sitting there looking at Seonghwa. No one had ever imagined anyone else but Wooyoung standing there.

You wanted Wooyoung to walk you down the aisle but in the end it didn’t seem very smart so you had your closest family member do it. You stood at the exit of the building trying to force yourself to walk out. You took a couple of deep breaths before you heard the music start to play.

You felt like you were going to simultaneously vomit and shit yourself.

Your heart felt heavy as you saw Seonghwa looking happier than ever and your feet felt more like cinder blocks the closer you got.

You were tearing up and before you knew it, your body was shaking with soft sobs. Seonghwa was the complete opposite, his eyes shone with only love as he took your hands in his.

Wooyoung had the dreaded task of being the ring bearer, even though he wasn’t a child, so he walked from his spot next to Seonghwa in front of the two of you to hand Seonghwa the box with the rings.

Wooyoung gave you the most pained smile you’ve ever seen and you couldn’t help yourself when you pulled Wooyoung in for a hug. You both held onto each other so tight, absolutely terrified of letting go. Finally Wooyoung decided to pull away with teary eyes and quickly went back to his spot.

Usually the groom goes first in saying his vows, but you decided that you wanted to start out.

You forced out a laugh as you started, “Seonghwa… we’ve known each other for the longest time. After I realised that you were just a big softie who smelt like c-cinnamon all the time… cinnamon… that’s how you make me feel, warm like cinnamon.”

Wooyoung’s heart froze. Maybe it was just a coincidence? It had to be. Until you said it again… and again… and when you gave Wooyoung the look, he knew he had to do something.

What was he supposed to do? He couldn’t just grab you and run, but he also couldn’t let you exchange rings.

Wooyoung’s adrenaline was pumping and he was suddenly glad he was there. His breathing got faster and he started shifting his weight anxiously, “You okay Woo?” San, who had noticed Wooyoung’s shift in mood was now… concerned to say the least.

Wooyoung couldn’t focus on anything else you were saying and before he knew it you had the ring and Seonghwa had his hand held out.

Your hand was so shaky and your vision was blurry from all the tears and you dropped the ring. That was Wooyoung’s opportunity, “I’ll get it-”

You glanced at Wooyoung and you knew, “I-I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Seonghwa- I’m sorry, I love you so much.”

Behind Seonghwa, the boys shut their eyes in anticipation and your mom gave Wooyoung a knowing look with a nod.

Seonghwa looked confused for a minute before Wooyoung successfully found the ring and gave it to Seonghwa.

You and Wooyoung looked at each other for a minute before he grabbed your hand and started running.

You wanted to look back but you couldn’t. You couldn’t bring yourself to see the look on Seonghwa’s face as you ran away with Wooyoung.

You listened to the gasps of everyone you passed by but in all honesty, most weren’t surprised.

San, Yunho, and Yeosang looked at each other in both shock and relief. They honestly were really close to running with the two of you.

It was dead silent besides the sound of the ocean. No one knew what to do. Do they just… leave? Do they wait? If you ran you’re probably… not coming back.

San really wanted to cheer you on but it would obviously be a little bit insensitive with Seonghwa standing there so he contained his cheers with the biggest smile on his face.

Seonghwa couldn’t even comprehend what happened. There was no emotion on his face. He looked at the ring in his hand to where you and Wooyoung were distant.

The two of you couldn’t be seen anymore and you finally stopped Wooyoung, “W-Wooyoung I’m in heels. The beach isn’t nice to heels.”

“Let me carry you then.” Wooyoung lifted you up bridal style and walked you back to the parking lot. When he found his car and let you down and looked at you with a cheesy smile.

You rolled your eye at him with a matching smile as you got into his car. As soon as Wooyoung got in he took off before anyone could find y’all. You watched Wooyoung as he was driving, “Do you think that was a little too harsh?”

Wooyoung thought for a moment, “Umm, I- maybe wasn’t the best outcome but it wasn’t the worst.”

You bit your lip in thought before you spoke, “Wooyoung I love you.”

Wooyoung glanced over to you as he pulled into the parking lot of the hotel he was staying at, “I love you.”

“No- Wooyoung I love you a-and I’m so sorry that I had to make you go through that.”

“Y-n, it’s okay-”

“No it’s not. It was so much unnecessary pain for the both of us. Me and Seonghwa, we were never going to work out. It just wasn’t meant to be. You’re what I want- no need. You’re my soulmate Wooyoung, and I know that’s cheesy and I understand if you just wanna give up on me and just be friends again… but that’s okay. It’s better than not being with you at all. It was so hard Wooyoung- I’m so used to being with you 24/7, i'm used to the way we used to cuddle, the way you would hold me and make me feel like everything is going to be okay and I miss it so much-” you continued to ramble until Wooyoung grabbed your face to get you to stop.

Your heart already felt like it was going to explode but when Wooyoung pressed his lips against yours, everything was calm.

It was right. This is how it was supposed to happen, with Wooyoung. Wooyoung was what you needed.

You pulled away with a smile, “Come on.” You got out of the car and walked into the hotel with Wooyoung trailing behind you. Y’all got a few stares along with a couple of ‘congratulations’ thrown at you making you laugh at Wooyoung's flushed cheeks.

Wooyoung takes your hand in his as he leads you to his hotel room. He immediately shuts the door and you move to sit on the bed.

The tension in the room was thick. You both knew what you wanted to happen but neither of you were making the move.

“Kiss me Wooyoung.”

That was the only push he needed. Wooyoung’s lips crashed against yours as you leaned back so you were laying on the bed. Wooyoung hovered over you and you held onto him tightly.

When Wooyoung pulled away he looked at your dress and laughed softly, “I- I don’t know how to take it off…”

You groaned at Wooyoung but you sat up and directed Wooyoung how to take it off. Wooyoung tried not to ruin the moment completely so he let his lips trail along your neck and shoulder.

Wooyoung pulled you so you were standing up and let the dress fall off of you. He picked you up and laid you in the middle of the bed while biting his lip.

Wooyoung sat up and took a minute to look at you, “W-Wooyoung-”

“Patience darling, I’m taking my time with you this time.” You whined as Wooyoung lowered himself down and attached himself to your neck.

“Wooyoung you can’t-” Wooyoung scoffed against your shoulder before he started to suck marks.

“Why not? You’re mine now.” You couldn’t stop the smile that came across your face before you squealed whenever Wooyoung bit down on your neck.

Your breathing was heavy as Wooyoung slowly made his way down your body with sloppy kisses and hickeys on your chest and stomach.

Wooyoung reaches your thighs and you stop him, “W-Wait.”

You grab onto his hips and bring him lower so you could grab onto his belt. You let Wooyoung straddle your waist as you shoved your hand in his pants to release his cock.

Your mouth watered as you slowly jerked Wooyoung off. He looked down at you with dark eyes and a parted mouth. Wooyoung reached underneath you to undo your bra with a groan when he saw you exposed underneath him, “You’re so pretty and you're all mine.

Your core was throbbing with need but you just ignored it in an opt to get Wooyoung off and his cock was pulsing in your hand.

You let out soft whimpers as Wooyoung kneaded your tits in between tweaking your nipples.

Suddenly Wooyoung pulled away from you making you groan before he moved up and held his cock in front of your lips. You immediately took him between your lips and sucked on his tip lightly.

Your legs instinctively spread as Wooyoung had a hand resting on your hip. He took that as a cue to dip his hand into your panties.

Wooyoung immediately felt how wet you are with a cocky smirk on his face, “I knew you’d come back for me to fuck you properly. Good thing you’re mine now so you’ll always get fucked right, just how you deserve.”

You pulled away from Wooyoung’s cock because you knew he was on the verge of cuming, “C-Cum in me.”

Wooyoung groaned deeply, “Please Wooyoung, show me that I’m yours. Make me yours.” He watched you for a second in complete disbelief before he gathered himself and spread your legs further as he carefully pushed into you.

You moaned loudly, remembering the stretch of Wooyoung’s cock. Your pussy pulsed around his cock, pushing him over the edge. Your eyes squeezed shut and your mouth was open as you took in the feeling of Wooyoung filling you.

Your legs wrapped around Wooyoung loosely as he started to thrust inside of you. He was still fully hard and was determined to get you to cum twice because he can’t be the one getting all the pleasure.

You were already embarrassingly close to cuming untouched so you almost came immediately after Wooyoung picked up his pace.

The fact that Wooyoung was still fully dressed while you’re completely naked was a lot hotter than it should be, so you grabbed onto his tie and pulled him down to attach his lips to yours.

Sloppy noises filled the room from your kisses along with your cum mixing together on your bottom half.

All the sensations mixed together were too much for you to handle especially when Wooyoung let his fingers trail down and rub figure eights on your clit.

You let out a muffled sob as your legs wrapped around Wooyoung’s waist again and held him close to you as you came. Your sobs mixed with whines got louder as Wooyoung slowed his thrusts, “Nonono! Don’t! Please don’t stop- please Wooyoung!”

Wooyoung laughed at how desperate you were before pulling out of you. You started babbling about how you needed to cum again and Wooyoung cocked his head in fake sympathy, “Aww, do you? I guess since I’m being nice today I’ll let you cum again.”

Wooyoung swiftly pushed back into you, making tears start running down your cheeks from how good it felt, “Does my cock make you feel that good? So good that you’re crying?” You couldn’t even answer Wooyoung properly from the pleasure you were feeling.

Wooyoung couldn't understand the incoherent babbling but he continued to tease you, “Huh, look at that, not only are you crying, but you're drooling too.” Your mouth was wide open and Wooyoung snorted as he used the opportunity to press his thumb against your tongue, “You’re so messy and I can tell you're about to make an even bigger mess.” He was right, you were about to cum again.

Wooyoung was waiting for you to cum again before he did. As much as his words affect you, they do the same to him.

He gripped your hips tightly as your legs tightened further around him, completely trapping him inside of you so you could cum again. Once again with the way you were throbbing so deliciously around Wooyoung’s cock, it didn’t take long for him to cum inside of you again.

Your soft whines and Wooyoung’s groans were filling the room as you both came down from your second orgasm.

As soon as Wooyoung pulled out of you, all of your mixed cum started to drip out of you and Wooyoung watched with furrowed eyebrows. He reached over to grab his phone and before you knew it, you saw a flash go off, “Jung Wooyoung I know you did not just take a picture of my pussy-”

Wooyoung laughs and takes a couple more, “I’m gonna put it as my background.”

“I dare you…”

Wooyoung pats your knee and gets up to get a wet towel to wipe off the mess on your pussy and thighs, “I told you- so messy.”

You roll your eyes and smack Wooyoung’s arm, “It was all you!”

Wooyoung looks at you with a smug smile, “Yeah, only because I fuck you so well. Now get up.”

“Wooyoung I can’t…” he really really wanted to make another remark but he decided to stop teasing you and removed the sheet from around you before you moved off of it.

It was actually kinda late and he was surprised neither of your phones were blowing up but he realised he had his on ‘do not disturb’

As Wooyoung was getting a set of clothes to sleep in he checked his call log and saw like 50 calls from several people.

“Don't call anyone back. At least not yet…” Wooyoung looked to where you were as you looked up at him with pleading eyes.

“I won’t… I want to stay with you.”

 You held your arms open for Wooyoung and he walked over to you with a smile, “But here, you need to put some clothes on before I wanna fuck you again.”

You giggle as you put on the shirt and boxers Wooyoung gave you before you wrapped your arms around him tightly.

The two of you lay in each other’s arms until you speak up softly, “I told you I’d never leave you.”

“I’m glad you didn’t.” Wooyoung didn’t take his eyes away from yours as he spoke, “I love you so much y/n and I know you’ve always felt the same a-and then you said yes when Seonghwa asked to marry you-”

“I know. It was always you Wooyoung, and I’m not going anywhere anymore. I’m all yours.”

[kaissauce]

okay, phucker, do it

ok let's do this @rolli-zolli @ninikins

Horrortale: technically an alternate timeline instead of au. after a neutral run where undyne's queen the core malfunctions and food becomes scarce and people resort to eating humans because sans suggested it. Aliza is the protag. latest thing that happened in the ongoing comic was Aliza agreeing to go with Papyrus to solve his last puzzle. as for the appearance of sans he has a HUGE hole on his head and a red eye. he got the hole from undyne when she got his magic eye which was going to be used to power the core. sans didnt die tho and killed the guards holding him down and just took whatever eye was on the ground and used it as a replacement for his magic eye that's powering the core. i quote first words he said after putting the eye in his socket "who the fuck took my phone?". then the magic eye went apeshit and broke the core again. oh and also he made alphys braindead by quite literally scrambling her brain. yeah this au is rough sans hasn't really eaten anything since the core was destroyed since he decided not to eat any humans.

Dusttale: i think this was originally a korean au? basic rundown: too many genocide runs sans goes apeshit and tries to get his Lv up by killing monsters himself man went fuckin insane kills his brother blah blah blah edgy angsty au the ghost of papyrus haunts him n stuff. sans literally just looks the same except he has his hood on and sometimes artists draw him with papyrus's scarf. the cool artists draw him with his hood on and has the hood completely cover his face so u can only see his glowing pupils. although people call him dust sans he's actually named murder sans

Killer: so frickin similar to dusttale except sans goes apeshit because of the human being like "join me lmao". three different outcomes come from this. i think it was 1 sans joins human 2 sans joins human kills human later on 3 kills human or something. friends with color sans who is basically his impulse control. pretty sure his soul's fucked up and Color sans tries to make his soul un-fucked but Nightmare comes in and fucks up the progress. he has white shorts, his eye sockets are constantly pitch black and leaking tar or something also has a weird target thingy on his chest. OH YEAH ALSO HE HAS BEEF WITH UNDERSWAP SANS ALMOST FORGOT. basically swap sans tried to make killer good and then they had a fight, swap sans lost and was on the verge of dying thankfully swap papyrus was able to save him in time i think

Dreamtale: Dream isn't in the drawing but his brother, Nightmare is. Sooo he used to not look all goooy and have tentacles n stuff but then he ate a couple hundred apples and yeah. he's six years old apparently. Nightmare and Dream are supposed to be guardians of a tree that has 500 golden apples and 500 black n goopy apples. the golden aples are positive and the goop ones are negative. you're not supposed to eat either of them cus bad shit happens. Dream and Nightmare live in a village and for whatever reason they're all dicks to Nightmare because ooughh he's the guardian of negativity that's not baller. he also goes apeshit (do u see a pattern here) and eats a goopy apple n then becomes the goop man he is today. he fuckin eats 999 apples jesus christ. and the last one is eaten by Dream because if u eat all 1000 apples u become unstoppable and immortal. so that would be a bad thing if nightmare got the last one. wop wop wop these dude aren't sanses they only have the body of one if that makes sanse.

Error: manlet. he's literally an error and that's why he's like that. also he's technically not a sans now, the redesign for him was so that he could be in the creator's webcomic named Lucidia. Error sans, aka the destroyer of aus, finds aus to be mistakes so he tries to get rid of them. his process of doing this is simple: get the human soul to the void so that they can't reset, destroy the au. he primarily attacks using his strings which can wrap around one's soul and control them. he like some aus like outertale because of how open and empty it is. he likes to be alone and has haphephobia. if u touch him he'll glitch out and possibly crash. he crashes whenever gets overwhelmed. said crashing causes him to shut down and reboot and he's powerless while doing so. he's actually pretty easy to beat if you know how to push his buttons the right way. in the og ask error blog made by his creator Loverofpiggies he kidnaps Swap sans who tries to help Error become a better person. this ends horribly as error leaves Swap sans in the void who then becomes an error aswell due to being alone in the void too long. Error actually regrets doing that to swap sans

Aftertale: OK FUN FACT THE SANS OF THIS AU, WHO'S NICKNAMED "Geno" IS ERROR. aftertale is a comic made by LoverofPiggies it's been SOOOO long since i last read it so i cant really give a good summary. but anyways Geno is trapped in the loading screen with the human and will die if he leaves the loading screen. eventually from being in the loading screen for too long after the events of aftertale he becomes Error.

OOF WOWIE THERE'S SO MUCH TO GO

Underfresh: he's not even a sans either. "Fresh" is a parasite inhabiting a skeleton. his birthday is on 4/20 which is ironic cus he doesn't like drugs. he censors swears. he speaks 90's lingo and dresses like a neon sign. for some reason he has eyebrows and a gold tooth. the glasses he has can change text but normally defaults to "YOLO". he can't feel anything since he has no soul of his own and just latches onto the host's. instead he learns how to act from the people around him. not being able to feel actually bothers him a LOT

Echotale: Aka Gaster sans. uhhh this one was also a comic if i remember correctly. basically Frisk and G!Sans are the only ones in the au and they're trying to find the core to fix the fucked up timeline that they're in but the core keeps changing positions so that sucks.

Swapfell: originally made by Khhoppang who left social media. Started out as an Alphys x Undyne au so only those two were designed but Kh was planning to design more of the characters. before they could people had a field day with the idea of mashing two aus together and SO many people came up with their own designs for sans and papyrus. Khhoppang left social media because they got overwhelmed with all the art reposters and stuff, pretty sad. the appearance of the sans in that au is the purple one with a scythe (i dont think he has a scythe in the og design).

Swapfell Red: so basically this is the swapfell made by people that isn't Khhoppang. community made per se. Sans's appearance changes constantly because as said before many people made many different designs. typically he just looks like Swap sans but with red high heel boots and his color scheme fits underfell

Fellswap (gold): Au made by blackggggum. so swapfell is underswap turned fell, fell swap is underfell swapped it takes a bit to understand that. his appearance is somewhat similar to Swapfell red. He's kind to his friends but if ur his enemy he'll fucking deck you. he's blind in his left eye, the leader of the royal guard, and secretly into dressmaking. fun fact in this au Papyrus has autism

Xtale: uuuuhhhh so Cross is a complicated one. he's part of the royal guard along with papyrus. has beef with xgaster. responsible for the downfall of his au and then Underverse happens and Ink is all "oh cool someone to mess with" and they became friends for a bit then shit hit the fan

Underfell: OOOOO YES UNIRONICALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITES. So Underfell sans is actually a very powerful mf and constantly has his magic eye activated because he has so much magic. This au is also technically an alternate timeline where monsters "lost their humanity" as the creator put it. so basically trust in the underground is scarce. Sans and papyrus, contrary to many interpretations i fucking hate, are actually on good terms (and no sans doesn't call papyrus "boss" the creator said if he does he'd do it ironically and papyrus would hate it). Fun facts he pays Grillby in socks (grillby accepts the socks as payment and wears them), if u make grillby laugh he gives u a jacket that looks like his and it's heavily implied that sans made him laugh because their jackets are similar

Underswap: ah yes another classic that i love as well. originally made by PopcornPr1nce who fled social media because they hated how the majority fandom treated Underswap (Blueberry and Carrot were popular names for the fanon swap papyrus and sans). Swap sans is constantly infantilized by the community which sucks and i hate it so i draw my own very super cool version of him whom i kin because i am also very super cool.

Outertale: mainly an aesthetic au pretty sure there's no comic of it. basically, instead of underground they in space. outer sans dies in underverse after like minutes of screentime lmao

Epictale: a comic made by Yugogeer. the og comic was retconned and the creator loathes the original version and made a reboot that's much better. Sans actually dies very early in it because Yugo hates how Sans is almost always focused on in aus. also the creator hates how meme-y their sans has become (like him saying bruh every single sentence, using a rubber chicken as a weapon, cookies, etc.) he's friends with Cross but not in canon. He has a purple magic eye that makes him immortal and i think only epic gaster could remove it which is how sans was able to be killed when he fought gaster.

Temmietale: it's undertale but everyone is temmie, don't question it

Trainertale: it's undertale but it's Pokemon, don't question it

Dancetale: it's undertale but you dance instead of fight, don't

Mobtale/Mafiatale: im unsure if mobtale and mafiatale are separate or not but they are very similar. basically undertale but mafia it's self explanatory

Undertale: no clue which au is this one, nope not at all/j

Bittytale or whatever idk: so take sans, make him small. boom. never understood this au

THAT BASTARD INK: HOOO BOY SAVED THE WORST FOR LAST. FUCK THIS GUY/j. THIS DUDE. IS THE REASON IM STILL INTO UNDERTALE AUS. I LOVE EM SO MUCH. also technically not a sans. He comes from an unfinished au and ripped his own soul to escape said au and became an outcode. for so long he was just a soulless husk until someone drew him and he got splashed with paint which let him feel. soon he learned to keep the paint in vials so that he can be able to feel 24/7. And then he learned how to create things with a paintbrush and the paint and spent time alone drawing up his own world until a portal appeared and took him to the multiverse. now he encourages artists to keep creating aus. he's the protector of aus in the sense that he keeps other outcodes from disrupting the script of the au, so if it's pacifist and an outcode tries to kill people he'd stop them, if it's genocide and an outcode tried to help them he'd stop them. no matter what he wants the au to stay on script. fun fact the creator of ink and the creator of error never had them interact with each other in canon, that was all the fandom's doing. Contrary to popular belief he's not really considered "good" his alignment is officially "Chaotic neutral". I personally interpret him a lot more chaotic than in canon because it's fun but he's a pretty chill guy actually. he can just be a bit of an ass sometimes. According to the creator of Ink (who is Comyet) his interpretation in Underverse is not canon compliant. one of the biggest canon things that underverse contradicts is Ink deliberately not taking his vials. if he were to do that in canon he'd become a husk again which is the equivalent of him "dying". he was described as a walking corpse by Comyet, without the vials he can't function anymore. Like Error he's pretty easy to beat if you know his weaknesses. also he has fears of empty spaces and being alone

off topic kinda but i very much love how Error and Ink are opposites yet parallel even though they were completely written without the other in mind. Error believes getting rid of aus is getting rid of anomalies. Ink believes people interfering with aus are anomalies. Error loves emptiness, Ink hates emptiness. list goes on it's funky fresh.

also uhhh sanses missing from that drawing that i can name from the top of my head

Seraphim sans, Insans, Dusttrust, He who shall not be named because he's from an 18+ au, Swapswap (yes. that exists), Storyshift, Inverted Fate (very good au i suggest checking it out), Negatale, Oceantale, Template, Pale, Mafiafell, Farmtale

my phone is at 9% y'all are spared from me going on

[bakugouisabitch]

nono, i care about your very specific highschool au. rant about it please.

dgslsjs omg youu 🥺

well if you insist.... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

okay, i once had a discord group which i miss sm rip where i shared some ideas from that AU so i’m basically gonna repeat them here now shsjs under the read more 👇

this AU includes both Maliks as siblings (+ Isis and Rishid ofc) and both Bakuras as siblings too. The two Yamis are the elder brothers of the non-Yamis so they also have their own name ofc. 

For Yami Malik I’d go with Amir cause the name is beautiful and fits him somehow (it means ‘prince’ or ‘chief’). This AU is literally so self-indulgent where I can finally write Amir just how I picture him in my head as the funny himbo he is, who makes some creepy jokes at times but is generally a nice guy and is just constantly stoned sdfgskh

For Yami Bakura i haven’t thought of a name yet 🙃 He’s low key the protag and I still don’t have a name for him 👏 good work, Ziggy 👏 I was thinking about something that makes his initials still be YB so a name with Y actually (Yamato maybe ?) Everyone calls him Bakura/Bakura-kun anway and they mostly call Ryou “the little Bakura”/Bakura-chan (affectionately) since he is the little brother ahsksfsj

In this AU Amir and YB are like really close friends. They are classmates in their last year together and they are known for being trouble makers. But not just like Honda and Jounouchi in the anime - they are worse than that. They have risked being expelled many times and smoke on the school’s rooftops and even hang out with older guys who sell illegal shit and such (it’d be tw for drugs ofc). OH and lots of spray painting on public places 👊 They are really best buds and bonded over same interests and music taste and same hate for the society and family and such. This fanart was a major inspiration to write these two as high school best buddies.

Also, I did a quick redraw of the typical anime boys sleeping in the classroom pose with these two. That’s them:

 (might finish it one day and post it seperately idk my motivation is swinging lately 🤷)

All their “criminal” behaviour ofc stems from a sad background/past because i’m just a sucker for angst and i keep making my boys suffer 😔 i’m sorry. Every guy in this AU has daddy issues or just family issues in general

YB is VERY overprotective over his little brother Ryou (who’s just two years younger than him, and just like Malik, starts his first high school year in Domino High School). He is literally responsible for raising him up because ever since they lost their mother and Amane (Ryou’s twin sister) at a very young age their father fell into a very deep depression and he’s constantly away “for work” and just generally neglects his two remaining sons. YB hates their father because of that so he has taken it as his own responsibility to make sure Ryou is always safe and protected and acts like the parent in their home (where there is usually just the two of them). Also, another self indulgent thing here: YB being an ass with everyone except for being an overprotective good big brother for Ryou 🥺 please! so cute!! (They ride a bike together on their way to school like this fanart)

The Ishtar’s parents are both dead. Their mother died when giving birth to the youngest one (Malik) and their father died under very tragic circumstances (still gotta think how 🤔 it definitely wasn’t Amir tho’) and they used to have a very abusive household thus why Amir HATES their dad. Contrary to Malik, who keeps saying he deserved a second chance and was a good father and wishes he could have made him proud ~ this always makes Amir and Malik fight amongst other things and this is what also bonds Amir and YB so much: the hate for their old man.

It would be a very psychological AU that deals with a lot of issues and shit and traumas the boys have to live with + adding all the typical teenage angst at that age so it’s CHAOS. and I’d also have the perfect soundtrack/playlist for it 💆‍♀️ (it would be set in the 90s)

Ofc it’d be bakumali because I can’t help myself (and maybe also Ryou x Amir as a side pairing 👀)

Since it’s Malik’s first year in domino high school he wants to be recognised as one of the “cool kids” and befriend the older boys from the class. he just hates it that his big brother (Amir) is always there as well. Compared to the Bakuras these two have much more of a turbulent kind of relationship going on as siblings, where they constantly fight and Amir says Malik “ruined” the family whenever their fights get harsher and Malik says father never loved him anyway. Isis and Rishid try to keep the family and the boys under control as young adults but it’s hard 😔

YB visits the Ishtars sometimes to hang out with Amir in his room where they listen to music, smoke weed, and play PS and such and this is when Malik “spies” on YB. he thinks his big brother’s friend looks so cool with his ripped jeans and eyeliner and black nail polish. One night YB and Amir are smoking weed in Amir’s room and playing PS when Malik would use the chance. He’d piss Amir off and tell him it’s his turn to take the trash out on purpose to make him leave his room. Ofc Amir says no but then Malik “threatens” him with “I will tell sister you smoke weed if you don’t take the trash out”. And so Amir leaves (slamming the door behind him like an unruly teenager and saying he’s gonna kill Malik) and leaves a stoned YB alone in his room. And this is when Malik uses the chance to be alone with a very confused and very stoned YB who wonders why Amir’s little brother seems to be so interested in him sdfghjkl and yea this is basically their first encounter.

Malik has basically a kind of obvious “fangirl crush” for YB but the latter is so confused why and what he even sees in him. Because for him there’s nothing “cool” in skipping school and breaking the rules, it’s just the only thing he knows. But for Malik this is the coolest shit he’s ever seen.

this little sketch i made kinda shows my idea for their relationship in this AU better sdfghjk:

Malik befriends Ryou (who is in his same class and school year) out of convenience ofc cause he wants to get closer to YB. Yes Malik is a lil bitch in this AU. And Ryou is like extremely nice and polite, he’s the weird silent kid who doesn’t have a lot of friends and lives in his own world. He falls victim to bullies a lot and YB also keeps that rough facade to make sure no one messes with him. Ryou befriends Malik and tries to answer all of the weird, intimate questions he has of his big brother...

One night I, like, imagined a scenario where Amir and YB are out spray-painting a wall behind the station with some other thugs and Malik and Ryou followed them secretly (it was all Malik’s plan) even if Ryou was totally contrary to the idea. Once they see the guys have drugs and alcohol Ryou wants to leave, but Malik says this is exactly what makes it exciting and joins them without warning. When Amir and YB see Malik they panic, wondering what he is doing here. Amir gets particularly pissed off and wants to just leave. ofc YB tells him he can’t just leave his young brother alone in a place like this with people like that. But Amir ignores him (and this will lead to one of the first big fights between the two best buddies 😔 they will punch each other. I told you it will have a lot of angst)

Anyway at the end Amir leaves and YB is decent enough to bring both Ryou and Malik home but then Malik insits on wanting to crash at their place. So YB is like “i guess??” And they spend the night together at the Bakura’s place :) YB takes the couch and leaves his bed for Malik to sleep in but Malik will have none of that ofc sgksksj

Okay sorry for boring you, I could go on forever with so many scenarios of this AU or like actually sit down and write it... and yea.. that’s it.... just angsty and misunderstood boys in a shitty society with shitty parents trying to find a sense with their lives 🥺

[fruitcoops]

Hii, i love your work! Can I request an angst fic with prompts 38, 31 and 78. Like Logan and Leo get into a big fight and Logan says something bad (like I hate u and something like that) and Leo just leaves and maybe goes to Remus and Sirius. And then they make up idk, just a happy ending.

Thanksss❤️❤️🥺

Hello! I really enjoyed writing this ask because I haven’t written a lot of relationship-related angst yet, and I’m pretty happy with it. Credit for Sweater Weather goes to @lumosinlove!

TW for arguing in relationships

Prompt 31: “He’s not answering his phone.”

Prompt 38: “Don’t talk like that.”

Prompt 78: “What did you just say?”

It started with a book.

It wasn’t a particularly special book—on the contrary, it was a beat-up copy of A Tale of Two Cities that Leo had received as a birthday present years ago. He didn’t even like the book that much, but it was a rainy day and he hadn’t slept and he wanted something familiar to daydream through.

There was a heavy, irritated sigh from the kitchen. Leo glanced up at Finn, who was folding laundry, and frowned. “Lo, you okay?” Finn asked.

“Fine.”

“You don’t sound fine.”

“It’s just—it’s fine.”

Finn set a pair of socks down and ducked into the kitchen; Leo turned back to his book, but kept both ears pricked. “What’s wrong?” Finn’s voice was soft and concerned.

“I don’t know, I’m just upset,” Logan answered. Dishes clanked in the sink and Leo winced, silently hoping none of them would be chipped. “Just finish the laundry and we can go to bed.”

Something in his tone rubbed Leo the wrong way and he stood, joining Finn in the doorway. “Hey, don’t talk to him like that.”

“Like what?” Logan set a fork down with more force than strictly necessary.

“You’re being snappy and I don’t like it. Finn doesn’t, either.”

Finn turned to look at him reproachfully. “What’s your deal?”

“Well, I was kind of looking forward to a quiet evening where we could hang out and read, but I guess that’s not going to happen.”

Logan huffed. “Maybe if you pulled your weight around here we could have a quiet evening.”

“Excuse me?”

“Finn and I have been cleaning for the last hour while you read your stupid book—”

“Leave me out of this!”

“—and I’m getting tired of cleaning up after you.”

Leo’s eyebrows rose and he huffed out a laugh, hardly believing his ears. “I’m sorry, who’s the one that leaves wet towels on the floor every fucking time he showers? Oh, but pardon me for taking an hour and a half to read after not sleeping because somebody was kicking me last night.”

“Both of you, cut it out,” Finn tried, holding his hands out to placate them. Blood thundered in Leo’s ears—he had no idea why his temper was flaring so suddenly, but he wasn’t going to back off and let Logan win. “Logan, I can finish the dishes. Leo, take a deep breath.”

“You’re taking his side now?” Leo asked incredulously. “You always take his side.”

“I’m not taking sides, I’m just trying to figure out what the hell is going on with you two!”

“What do mean, he always takes my side?” Logan crossed his arms and leaned against the counter, quiet rage twisting his face.

“That’s what you do.” The words were coming out of him in a torrent—unstoppable and furious. “You two tag-team every time we get in a fight and suddenly I’m outnumbered.”

“Wha—tag team?” Finn shook his head in disbelief. “Leo, what the fuck are you talking about? I love you, Logan loves you, and you love us.”

If Leo hadn’t been so angry, he probably would have missed Logan muttering under his breath. Instead, he rounded on him, his fists clenching and unclenching. “What did you just say?” Logan glared and kept his mouth shut. “Logan, what did you just say?”

“Nothing you’ll care about,” he said coldly.

Leo shook his head and grabbed his keys off the kitchen counter. “Fuck off, Logan. Just fuck off.”

The slamming of the door behind him was not nearly satisfying enough to quell his nausea and the pounding in his head. He got in the car and turned off the radio with a hard jab to the CD port; the opening notes of one of Logan’s favorite songs from the road trip playlist made Leo’s eyes sting as he pulled out of the garage and headed down the road.

“What did I just do?” he asked the empty car. “Jesus, Leo, you just stormed out with no plan and left two angry boyfriends behind, and now you have nowhere to go and nothing to do and nobody to go home to—”

He pulled over, parked the car, and burst into tears. Leo hadn’t cried like that since his first night in Gryffindor, so far away from home and too afraid of waking Logan up with his sobs to do more than silently weep into his pillow. Logan had definitely heard anyway, because when he woke up the next morning there was a hot cup of coffee next to the door.

“I fucked up.” The steering wheel made his forehead itch. “I fucked up so bad, oh my god.”

You need to go somewhere, the reasonable voice in his head that sounded quite a bit like his dad chided. If you go back and apologize, they’ll take you back.

I can’t. It’s too soon and I’m still upset.

Then think. Who else cares enough to let you stay?

Leo sniffled and wiped at his tears with the sleeve of his sweater. No, not his sweater—Finn’s. It took him another five minutes to pull himself together enough to turn on his blinker and head out onto the road again, following the familiar path without even needing to check his phone. The December air made the dried tears on his cheeks extra cold as he walked up the driveway with his hands stuffed in his pockets, shivering in the cold. This was nothing like home.

He heard the doorbell ring through the house and stepped back a bit to admire the holiday lights in a rainbow of colors. They sparkled, a beacon against the night that made his heart clench. The door swung open a few moments later. “Hey, Leo, what’s…going on?” Remus trailed off.

“Hey,” he sniffled. “Uh, can I come in?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” Remus moved to the side so he could enter and he slipped his shoes off in silence, hoping against hope that he wouldn’t absolutely lose it right on the welcome mat. “Are you okay? Sorry, bad question. What happened?”

“We got in a fight,” Leo said miserably, keeping his eyes on the floor. “Logan and I. Finn got dragged into it and really it was my fault and I just kinda left.”

“Okay. Do you want a hug?”

He nodded without a word and Remus wrapped him tightly in his arms. He rubbed soothing circles on his back—Leo felt more tears slide down his face as he melted into the warm touch. “I’m sorry for not letting you know I’d be here.”

“Don’t worry about it, we’re always glad to see you. Can we move into the kitchen for a sec so you can drink some water?”

“Once a PT, always a PT,” Leo joked halfheartedly as he pulled away and scrubbed at his eyes. “Ugh.”

The kitchen was cheerful and simple, with dark red walls and white cupboards. He sat down at the island and put his chin on his forearms as Remus got him a glass of water and dampened some paper towels. “I don’t know where I put the tissues, sorry.”

“Thanks, Loops,” he said, wiping his face.

“Re, was someone at the door?” Sirius came around the corner and stopped in his tracks. “Hey, Leo.”

“Hey.”

He glanced at Remus, then set his empty bowl on the counter and leaned against the fridge. “What’s up?”

“Logan and I got in a fight.”

“With each other?”

“No, with the mailman,” he snapped, instantly regretting it. His lower lip wobbled; this was just how the fight had begun in the first place. “Sorry. Yeah, with each other. And Finn.”

“Where are they?”

“At h—home.” His voice cracked on the last word. “I left.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Remus asked carefully, sitting down next to him.

Leo’s shoulders slumped and he rested his temple on Remus’ shoulder. “It was so stupid.”

“Don’t talk like that, it was clearly important.”

“I was reading for an hour instead of helping them clean up because I was so fucking tired, and Logan was frustrated that I wasn’t helping. Finn tried to calm us both down, but I accused him of taking sides and then Logan mumbled something and wouldn’t tell me what he said.” It all blubbered out on a fresh wave of emotion and Remus handed him the paper towel again.

“That doesn’t sound stupid,” Sirius said in the gentlest voice Leo had ever heard him use.

“Really?”

“Really. It sounds like you let some things build up for too long, like a volcano.”

Leo sniffled. “You sound like my dad.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“I think so.” He straightened up again and took a long sip of water. “God, I feel awful.”

Remus squeezed his shoulder. “I’m not surprised. Have you eaten recently?”

“We were going to have dinner when Lo finished with the dishes. So, no.”

“You want a sandwich?”

“Yes, please.” To Leo’s surprise, Sirius pulled a block of cheese out of the fridge and bread out of the cupboard. “You cook?”

He and Remus made identical ‘ehhh’ noises. “Un peu,” Sirius laughed. “I burn soup, but grilled cheese is easy.”

“How the fuck do you burn soup?”

“You want to know the worst part?” He looked over his shoulder briefly. “It was canned soup.”

“What?”

“Mhm. I turned the heat on high because I thought it would cook faster.”

Leo’s tide of emotions molded into total confusion. “Why would you do that? The instructions are on the can.”

“Strangely enough, that’s what I told him,” Remus said wryly. “And still it’s happened twice.”

“You are so mean to me,” Sirius sighed as he turned the stove on. “I make you grilled cheese sandwiches and this is the thanks I get?”

“Sorry, love.”

“How do you do that?” Leo asked.

Remus turned back to him. “Do what?”

“Have this…” He gestured vaguely. “Perfect, amazing relationship. How?”

Sirius snorted and returned to his place by the fridge. “It’s not perfect.”

“But you’re so happy all the time.”

“Aren’t you?” Remus asked. “When you’re with your boys, aren’t you happy?”

“Yes,” he answered immediately. “They’re the best thing in the world.”

“Do you have a perfect relationship?”

“Uh, no.”

“There’s your answer.” Remus spread his hands. “Fights happen. Sometimes you can’t stand to even be in the same room as your person, or your people. Sometimes it feels like everything they do drives you crazy. But that doesn’t mean you stop loving them, and they don’t stop loving you.”

“The fight wasn’t about me reading,” Leo said quietly. Understanding was beginning to settle in. “And it wasn’t about Logan leaving towels all over or me not pulling my weight. I think we both just had bad days. Is that normal?”

“I hope so,” Sirius said. “Three months after we moved in together, Remus slept on the couch for a week because he hated the way I left toothpaste on the sink.”

“I wasn’t even angry about the toothpaste.” Remus got up to refill Leo’s water glass. “I was scared we were moving too fast and that everything would fall apart.”

“I was—I am—scared,” Leo confessed. “There’s just so much happening all the time. Finn and Logan…they’re my center point. My anchor.”

Sirius slid a perfect grilled cheese sandwich onto a plate and handed it to him. “Then you should tell them that.”

Just as he took his first bite, the doorbell rang. Remus frowned. “We’re popular tonight.”

After checking his phone quickly, Sirius wandered down the hall, and in his absence a large black dog came out of the living room to set her head on Leo’s thigh. “Hey, Hattie.” He scratched her behind the ears and tore off a piece of his sandwich to give her.

“Oh. Hello.” Sirius sounded surprised.

“Hey, Cap.”

Leo froze and Remus’ eyes widened. “Have you heard from Leo?” Finn asked. “He’s not answering his phone.”

“Because of the fight,” Sirius said.

Remus dropped his face into his hands. “Tact,” he muttered. “We’ve talked about this.”

“Uh, yeah, actually.” Leo could picture Finn’s face in his head, uneasy and worried. “So he’s talked to you?”

“He’s been in our kitchen for the last half hour.”

“What?” Logan’s voice cracked. “He’s—can we come in?”

“No shoes in the house.” There was a moment of rustling, then a staccato pattern of footsteps in the hall before Logan and Finn appeared in the entrance.

“Mon dieu.” Logan nearly collapsed against the doorframe when he saw Leo; his eyes were red-rimmed and he seemed to be a bit of a wreck. “I’m so sorry, Peanut.”

“We’ll be upstairs if you need anything,” Remus said, slipping out of the room with a final glance to Leo.

“My phone was off, sorry,” he said quietly, feeding Hattie another bit of bread. The pressurized fury from before was completely gone—he only felt regretful now, and utterly exhausted. “I’m also sorry for yelling. And accusing you. And for dragging you into it, Finn. Oh, and for leaving.”

“I’m sorry, too.” Logan took two tentative steps closer and Leo stood up, holding his arms out. Relief crashed over his face and he nearly tackled him in a hug. “I took out my bad day on you and as soon as you were gone I regretted it. Merde, Leo, I’m sorry.”

Extra warmth cocooned them both as Finn joined the hug. “I love you both so much,” Leo mumbled into Logan’s hair.

Logan snuggled closer. “I love you, too.”

“Me, three.”

They all laughed weakly at that, stepping back and sitting down at the island. Leo bit the inside of his lip. “So…things were said.”

“Things were said,” Logan agreed. “I didn’t mean what I said about cleaning up after you.”

“I know. I didn’t mean what I said about tag-teaming.” He winced at the memory. “That was flat-out mean and uncalled for. And Finn…” Finn looked up from petting Hattie. “I used you as leverage and that was horrible.”

“Same here,” Logan said guiltily.

“Yeah, let’s not do that again, okay?” Finn looked between them and raised his eyebrows as they both nodded. “I don’t take sides when I’m choosing between my boyfriends.”

“Leo…” Logan started and trailed off.

“Yeah, Lo?”

He struggled for the words for a moment, then took a deep breath. “Do you—do you want to know what I said in the kitchen?”

In the kitchen…Leo wracked his brain and tried to remember. They had been arguing, and then Logan muttered something he couldn’t hear. He was tempted to say yes. “No, I’m good.”

“Really?”

He shrugged. “We were both upset. Whatever it is, I don’t think you meant it, so it doesn’t matter now. We’ve fought enough tonight.”

“Should we head home, then?” Finn suggested, taking both their hands. “I’m pretty tired and hungry.”

“You could ask Cap to make you a grilled cheese,” Leo joked. “They’re damn good.”

“Cap can cook?” they chorused incredulously.

[oscar-lettjohanssonloveme]

Stop Running (Cordelia x Wilhemina x fem!reader x Ally)

idk what we got here, but its reeeeeeally long and made with google translate..so excuse me

summary: you have to meet the son of your girlfriends and he reminds you of ur dead brother and all the memories of ur childhood come back

warnings: suicide, depression, scars, child abuse..

Being in a relationship with 3 women at the same time was probably something like the jackpot. Before, you didn't even think you'd get one and now you had 3.

You still remembered the night these three women came into the club where you worked as a waitress. In the beginning it was just little things like saying 'please' and 'thank you' when you brought them something. Most of the people who came to this club got drunk too quickly to be polite.

Then they started asking you questions.

“What's your name?”

“How is it possible that a pretty girl like you works in a club like this?” (a question that made you blush)

“How can we get your attention?”

And at one point you gave a shit about your work and sat with them for the rest of the night. And at dawn they took you to their bed with them. You were the only sober person that evening, but the next morning none of the 3 were surprised or angry about your presence.

It had developed into a frequency, every Friday night they'd come to the club only to leave with you at the end of the night. And at some point it became more.

The trio had piqued your interest since the first night, which was probably because there were three of them and later you wanted to know everything about them. You found out that Ally was widowed with a son, that Wilhemina had her cane with scoliosis and that she had a secret fetish for the Victorian era, and that Cordelia was the headmistress of a witch's school, they all lived in.

And at some point you had to find out that you were in love with all three at once.

You loved Mina's severity and how proud she walked despite her scoliosis. No one had ever walked so gracefully with a cane, you were sure of that.

You loved seeing how gentle and balanced Delia was with everyone.

And you loved Ally when she explained the world to you and was the smartest person in the room.

The problem was that you were too scared. These women had known each other for a number of years and you had only known them for a few weeks. How many times have you wondered if you were just a distraction for her bedroom?

You were ashamed of this question and started avoiding contact with them. But when they confronted you, you finally revealed your feelings to them.

They weren't angry, on the contrary, they started laughing.

———————————

"We thought you knew that we love you too and were now afraid that you would avoid us because of that .." said Delia.

"Oh .." you mumbled confused.

"We're sorry we never made it official .." Ally said, putting a hand on your knee. "We thought it was obvious .."

-----------------------

And now you've finally been living with them for a week. You almost lived with them anyway. You knew the big building of the academy almost by heart, Delia's girls knew and liked you, and most of the time you spent in the trio's rooms instead of your own little apartment.

There was a little problem though: Oz, Ally's son.

Ally had decided it would be better if you didn't meet him until you officially lived with them. It wasn't up to you, but the circumstances were very complicated. If one mother died and you had two new ones, you didn't need a third.

The night you found out about Oz's existence, Ally had also told you the story of the Cult and how she killed Ivy.

—

"I want there to be no secrets between us. And I'm not proud of what I did, but it's part of me now .." she had said.

"We have all done things that we are not proud of .." was your reply.

—

The three of them tried to prepare Oz for you as best they could, which wasn't difficult because Oz wasn't a complicated kid. And you had been confident, because actually you got on well with children.

"Oz is in his room .." Ally said as she walked into your living room. She grabbed your hands to pull you up from the sofa before kissing you on the cheek.

Both of you were at home alone at the moment, as Delia and Mina were working afterwards.

You gave her a warm smile and together you went to the boy's room. Ally knocked on the door briefly before opening it. Her hand never left yours. A blond boy was sitting on the bed reading a comic. "Oz, this is Y / N .. I told you about her .." Ally said. The boy, Oz, raised his head and looked straight at you. Your breath caught at the sight of him.

He looks like Leo, was your first thought.

This little boy looked just like your little brother had looked that age. You got dizzy. All that you repressed in the last few years suddenly all shot back into your memory. Your abusive father, who hobbled on a stick because of his broken leg and didn't fail to punish Leo or you for anything senseless. Your alcoholic mother who drowned her frustration in alcohol and was never there when you needed her. And Leo, your Leo that you loved so much. How many times did you want to run away and stay because of him? Then this picture shot in your head, you were 17 at the time and he was 15. One day you came home and his dead body had tumbled from the ceiling by his belt. He couldn't take it anymore and you hated yourself so much that you didn't notice.

"Honey?" Ally's voice brought you back to the present. You looked away from Oz, who was now looking at you in confusion, and fixed your gaze on Ally. "I thought it would be better if I gave you some time alone .." she whispered.

"Sure ..", you nodded slowly.

She smiled and squeezed your hand. "Good .." was the last thing she said before leaving the room.

You stood lost in the boy's room, who by now was fixated on his comic again, and didn't know what to do. You wanted to run after Ally, bury you in her arms and start crying. But you knew that it probably wouldn't go down too well with Oz, so you just paused.

"She's happy again .." Oz suddenly said without looking up from his comic.

"Excuse me, what?"

"I mean mom .. she laughs a lot more .."

"Didn't she do that before?", You were confused.

"Yea .. but it always seemed so forced .. When Delia and Mina started to meet her, she felt like shit and she had to get back to normal, she was somehow sick or something like that .. I think she is happy to have someone who didn't see her as this wreck and that's why she's happy .. "

You didn't answer what he said because you couldn't judge it.

So it takes three women to replace one .. you thought and immediately hated yourself for it.

"What are you reading?" You walked slowly to the bed and sat down next to Oz.

"Avengers .." he muttered.

Inside you were relieved, at least something you knew.

"And do you like it?", You looked into the book and began to read along. "It's cool .." he said curtly and read on.

"That's Civil War .." you stated after two minutes. Confused, he looked at you sideways. "You know it?" "Of course.." He nodded shortly before looking back into the book. "Are you Team Cap or Team Iron Man?" You asked. "Although I like Iron Man more, Team Cap .. The way Shield is fighting him here sucks," Oz said and you nodded. You noticed the Iron Man movie poster hanging on his closet. "Have you seen the films?" "Nope .." he shook his head. "Mom won't let me .." "How old are you?" "11 .." "Okay well .. maybe I can talk your mom and we can watch her together .." you said.

"Are you serious? ..", he looked at you skeptically. "Yes .." you nodded. "I mean it's her choice, but I don't think the films are that dangerous you can't watch them .." "That would be cool .." he muttered, staring at the Iron Man poster.

--------------------------

"How about Oz, Y / N?" Asked Mina, who was sitting across from you. You looked up from your meal.

"Good .." you mumbled briefly

"Good ..?" She repeated before taking another sip of her red wine. Her eyes were still attached to yours.

"Yes ... I think I'll be able to make friends with him .." you added when you noticed that your answer was a bit short.

It was 10 p.m. and the four of you hadn't eaten with the other girls and Oz as usual, but only did it now because Mina had come home so late. And you had been noticeably quiet, still thinking about your Leo.

Ally put a hand on your knee under the table as she always did to calm you down. "You seemed very ..", she searched for words. "impressed? I don't know .."

"Uhm yes .. I was a little bit overstrained ..", you tried to smile at her, but you could still feel Mina's penetrating look. Like she's trying to look inside your head.

Cordelia, realizing the tense mood, let out a laugh.

"Overstrained would also fit our attitude when we met him for the first time ..", she said and threw a loving look at Mina.

"yeah?" You asked confused, because Cordelia always got on well with everyone.

"Oh yes .." she continued. "Ally had also left us alone with him and we didn't even know what to do .. I think it is already difficult for a child to accept one new person in the mother's life and then two ... it was all a little bit complicated.."

"And what did you do then?"

"We ended up playing Monopoly .." she said with a grin. You started to laugh. "Monopoly?" "Yes and in the end Mina was angry because she had lost .." You looked at Mina, who blushed. "Those were the wrong rules we were playing with .." she muttered. "You're just a bad loser, honey .." Cordelia said, still grinning.

Smiling you looked back and forth between the women. "So are you all right?" Ally asked again, drawing your attention back to herself. You nodded quickly. "yes, it's all good. Oz is great .. so he told me that you wouldn't let him watch the Marvel films .. they really aren't that bad, I think it's okay .."

"You think so?" She raised an eyebrow.

"Jesus Ally, don't feel criticized right away..I just mean that I could imagine watching them with him..you know, then this thing with befriending him might work better ..", you said and started playing with your fingers

Her eyes relaxed at your words. "I think that's no problem .."

------------------------------------

The next day you lay on the sofa, tired, trying to get some sleep. At night it was impossible: every time you closed your eyes, you saw the picture of the dead Leo in front of your eyes.

Ally was sitting at the end of the sofa with your legs in her lap, her fingers running over them, while she was reading an article on her cell phone.

An approaching knock made you flinch and your body stiffened, which Ally didn't go unnoticed. This is your father, you startled for a moment.

"Don't worry, Princess .. outside of the bedroom, Mina's walking stick is no danger for you .." Ally said to you and laughed.

She might found it funny, but her words made you scared, not that you wouldn't be interested in this type of sex ... But the thought of Mina hitting you with her stick made you feel uncomfortable.

"Oz is looking for you Y / N ..", Mina said as she entered the room and saw Ally and you on the sofa. You nodded briefly and jumped up to go to the boy. "Thanks Mina .." was the last thing you muttered before you left the room.

Oz was in his room, as expected. You knocked just before you entered. He was sitting at his desk doing homework.

"Mina said you'd look for me .." you said and stepped up to him. "Are we watching Iron Man today?" He asked without looking up from his duties. "Today?", You were surprised. Ally had given Oz permission to watch the movies with you at breakfast, but you didn't expect to start today. "Yup.." "uhm...Sure" "Cool ..", he raised his head and grinned crookedly. Leo shot through your head. "See you later Y / N .." "See you then," you mumbled and left his room.

A few hours later you were sitting next to Ally's son on the sofa and tried to concentrate on the film. Oz sat next to you, focused on the film and just made a few comments.

The whole evening was relatively relaxed until Oz put his head on your shoulder and immediately you were a 13 year old girl again and next to you was not your lover's son, but your 10 year old brother Leo. You weren't in the living room either. You sat crouched at the end of your bed, Leo next to you, his head on your shoulder. The TV had turned into a door that you and Leo are now staring at, concentrating on the voices behind it. It was your father fighting with your mother. Your heartbeat quickened immediately. You could hear his footsteps as he hobbled his stick down the hall. It became harder to breathe when you saw the doorknob move down and-

"It works better than I expected.." Ally's voice whispered and you were immediately back in the living room.

"Is everything okay?" She asked confused when she saw your distraught look. You nodded slowly. "Yes-", you stuttered. "I'm just a little surprised, I thought it would be more complicated to make friends with Leo .." "Leo?", Ally sat down on the sofa and pulled her sleeping son into her lap. "Oz ..." you corrected yourself quickly. "I have no idea how I come up with Leo .. in the film someone was called that .." "You're shaking Y / N .." Ally remarked and saw you concerned at. "I'm sorry," you looked down at your trembling hands. "I'm just very nervous about Oz I think .."

Ally smiled. "You don't have to .. you're doing great .."

------------------- -----------

The next morning the 4 of you, Oz and the other girls were having breakfast together.

"That was cool last night, Y / N .." Oz said suddenly and your attention was on him.

"I think so too ..", you smiled gently at him.

"What I can think of .." Ally remarked. "I have a meeting tonight and Mina has to work late ... so you'll be alone with Oz ..." She looked back and forth between you and Cordelia. "I'm out .." Delia said and sipped her coffee. "Misty and I are going to the greenhouse tonight .." "Oz and I can come with you..I am sure that Oz-" "Misty and I want to be there alone, Y / N .." Cordelia shot you an apologetic look.

"Oh okay ..", you looked carefully at Oz, who was too busy with his food to catch anything in your conversation. "That's not a problem for you, is it?" Ally asked. You shook your head quickly. "No.."

So the subject was off the table and Mina's eyes stabbed your skin again. Although she hadn't said anything, she was probably the one who felt your discomfort the most.

In the evening you and Oz had dinner alone and at first everything went well, you talked about the movie from the previous evening over dinner and you didn't have to think about Leo at all.

"okay .." you started and stood up. "I'll tidy up the kitchen and that's when you finish your homework .." Oz grinned. "Whoever finishes first .." he said and ran out of the room. You had to smile when you started washing the dishes. 10 minutes later Oz walked slowly into the room and you immediately noticed that something was wrong.

"What's up?" You frowned. Oz without a word took out his soccer ball and a few broken pieces from behind his back. "What's that?" You asked calmly.

"I finished my homework and was playing with the ball in the living room. The ball hit Delia's vase and it fell from the cupboard .." he whispered and looked at the broken pieces in his hand.

You stared at him and saw Leo again and wondered what your dad would have done to him now. Tears stung your eyes. "I can't do this anymore .." you sobbed and buried your face in your hands.

Oz looked up at you with wide eyes. "I'm really sorry, Y / N! It wasn't on purpose ... I-"

"Oz no-" you said quickly and crouched down to look at him directly. "I'm not mad at you .. You know, I'm even glad that the thing is broken .. To be honest, I found the vase totally hideous .." "Really?" He asked skeptically. You nodded and tried to smile. "Are you hurt?" "No .." he shook his head.

"Well ... let's clean up the mess now and please don't play with the ball in the house anymore."

---------------------------

"Something is wrong with Y / N .." you heard Ally say to Cordelia the next evening.

You actually wanted to go to them in the living room, but when you heard your name, you couldn't help but stop to hear what they said about you.

"What do you mean?" You heard Delia ask. Ally seemed to think twice about what to say. "Oz told me last night that she started crying when he told her, the vase was broken .." she finally said.

Fuck. You closed your eyes

"I would probably have cried too, I liked the vase .." joked Cordelia. Ally groaned. "That's not funny Delia .. When I walked into the living room the day before, when Oz and Y / N were watching this movie, she also looked totally scared. She was shaking and looked like she was going to cry any moment .." she said.

Delia hummed thoughtfully. "Did you ask her about it?" "She said she was so nervous about Oz, but I don't believe her .. I guess-"

"What are you doing here in the dark, princess?" Mina's lips to your ear made you jump.

"Jesus, Mina .." you cursed and turned to your girlfriend. You could see her grinning in the moonlight that shone in through the hall window. "I didn't hear you coming .."

"If you can't even hear me coming, then you must have been really distracted .." she said, sounding somehow sad. "Let's go in. Unless you want to keep staring at the door here ..", she reached past you to open the door. You gave way and pointed into the room. "Age before beauty .." you just said and made her laugh before she entered the room in front of you.

The previous conversation between Ally and Delia never seemed to have taken place because they both just sat there, Delia read a book and Ally scrolled through her cell phone.

--------------------------

"Happy Birthday, Princess ..", Cordelia whispered in your ear in the morning and let you wake up. "How do you know that?", You grumbled tired and slowly opened your eyes. Delia sat next to you in the Scross-legged in bed. "I am the supreme, i know everything ..", she said smugly and let you snort in annoyance. "Of course you do .." you mumbled and sat up. "Where are Mina and Ally?"

"At work? Honey, it's 11 am .." Cordelia laughed. "And what are you still doing here?" You asked confused. "Can't I spend time with my girlfriend when it's her birthday?" She smiled sweetly at you.

"Do the others know ..?"

"Nope ..", she bit her lip. "I kind of felt like you wouldn't like it if we knew ..." "I don't either," you confirmed. "Still, you'll be sad when you find out .." she muttered.

For a moment it was quiet between the two of you and you just stared at each other. And just as you were wondering how Cordelia could look so good, even though she had just woken up too, she leaned over and kissed you.

"mh delia-" you protested against her lips.

"What?", She withdrew disappointed. "I actually wanted to give you your present now ..", she grinned and enjoyed how you blushed at her statement.

"At least let me brush my teeth beforehand .." you mumbled embarrassed and jumped off the bed.

"Hurry up, princess .."

---------------

In the late afternoon you sat across from Mina at the table. Ally was still working and Cordelia had arranged to meet Misty in the greenhouse. Mina was reading the paper in thought, a habit that you found incredibly cute. You yourself were playing some random game on your cell phone when the message tone on your cell phone beeped.

Message from Joanne: "Hello Y / N, I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. I'm going to your city next week because I have to go to the doctor and wanted to ask if you would like to meet me?

~ Joanne. "

Your heart quickened on the last sentence. Joanne was your mother and wrote you every year for your birthday, you had never even answered one of her messages and now she wanted to see you again after so many years. She would come here and there was nothing you could do against it.

"Y / N ..?"

You raised your eyes to Mina, who was frowning at you.

"You're hyperventilating .." she remarked emotionless.

"I'm just dizzy ...", you gasped and stood up to run into the bathroom, or rather to stumble into the bathroom. You could feel your stomach turn as you leaned over the toilet and vomited into the toilet bowl.

The world around you seemed to be spinning. The closed bathroom door became the door of your nursery, you could even hear the knock on your father's stick. And how he got closer and closer. You tried to scream, but your mouth was only a soft gasp. Tears stung your eyes. "Please .." you tried silently to get air. A hand put on your back and you instantly jumped away from the toilet. "Please don't hurt me ..", you whimpered and looked fearfully into the face of the person in front of you.

Mina stood in front of you in shock, she had never seen you like this before. And the look you gave her broke her heart. "Honey you need to calm down .." She sat carefully on the floor and grimaced as pain ran through her back. Slowly she reached out her hand to touch yours, which was a mistake. Your hand jerked back, you reached out and let your hand fall against her left cheek. "Don't touch me .." you growled. "What the hell Y / N .." Mina hissed, grabbing your cheeks and forcing you to look at her. "It's me, princess, Mina ..", she whispered and felt her own eyes fill with tears. Your eyes widened when you recognized your girlfriend. And with that you finally broke, but Mina was there to pull you into her lap while you cried into her blouse. She held you as tightly as she could while trying to process the things that had just happened. The cheek your hand had marked on it burned like fire and yet it was impossible for her to realize that you had just hit her. It had never been you, she thought. And yet it was you who was lying in her arms right now.

"I'm so sorry .." you sniffed into her blouse when you had slowly calmed down. Mina gently put her hands around your cheeks and searched your face as if it contained any answers for what had just happened. She swallowed just before speaking. "Are you scared of me, Y / N?"

When her words reached your ear, you wrapped your arms around her torso and did your best not to hurt her. You felt so damn guilty.

"I would never hurt you .." she said softly against your ear, her voice thick with tears.

"I know Mina .." you whispered. "And I could never be afraid of you .."

You drew her back before your fingers slided down her right cheek where your hand marked it. "I'm so sorry .." you repeated your words from a few seconds ago.

"I'm fine Y / N", Mina assured us and took your hand. "I'm just worried about you .. I've been watching you for the last few days, you're acting totally strange .."

"I'm okay .." you mumbled and stood up with shaky legs.

"Don't damn me lie to Y / N! ...", she hissed and there she was again, the strict Mina you loved so much.

"Mina .. I'm really fine, you just shouldn't worry .. That's why I would prefer if Ally and Delia didn't find out about what just happened ... "you said as you leaned towards the mirror to fix your hair.

Mina shook her head blankly and propped herself up. "You are unbelievably Y / N .. two minutes ago you were lying here on the floor and now you're pretending nothing happened ... You won't be able to run away forever .. "she said, took her walking stick and walked past you to leave the bathroom.

You had never spoken to anyone about it, nobody knew about what had happened in your family and actually you had sworn to yourself that you would never tell anyone about it. Simply because you felt terrible about it, somewhere Leo's suicide was also your fault because you weren't strong enough to defend him.

You ran into the hallway and saw Mina sitting at the table again. Lost in thought, she looked out the window. "I think I'll go to sleep, I'm relatively tired ..." you said. Mina didn't move an inch. "You probably won't see me again today .." you muttered and went into your bedroom to actually get some sleep.

---------------

A few hours later you woke up from a bad dream.

It was dark and the first thing you noticed was Minas lavender perfume that surrounded you. Then you realized that, despite the events of the previous day, you 4 had taken your usual sleeping position: You and Ally were in the middle. Cordelia on the right edge, next to Ally and Mina on the left edge, next to you. Mina had her arms wrapped tightly around you and your head was on her chest. Like a few hours ago in the bathroom, you noticed.

Are you scared of me, Y/N?

Mina's words echoed in your head. The sad look she gave you made you feel infinite guilt.

"Mina?" You whispered softly against her neck.

"mhm ..". Mina hummed in her sleep.

"Are you awake..?" You knew how stupid and unnecessary that question was, but you couldn't help it.

She didn't answer at first, before moving after a few seconds.

"Now yeah .." she muttered as she pressed her nose against your hair.

"I just wanted to say, I love you .." you whispered and played with the purple fabric of Mina's pajamas.

"I love you too, princess ..". Was her answer and she kissed you on the forehead. Then it became quiet again and after a few minutes you could tell from her breath that she had fallen asleep again. Unfortunately, in contrast to her, you were wide awake and therefore decided to get up. Carefully you free yourself from her arms and sat up in bed. Confused, you noticed that the place next to Ally, who was sleeping sweetly, was empty. Where was Cordelia? You carefully climbed out of bed and went to look for the blonde, only to find her in the bathroom. You crept and stopped suddenly when you saw Cordelia lying in the bathtub.

Cordelia gave you a warm smile when she saw you and you couldn't help but laugh out loud. "What's so funny?" Cordelia grinned. "You .." you uttered, still laughing. "I?"

"Yes. You .. It's two o'clock in the morning and you sit here in the dark and bathe ...". You trotted to the sink. "It's not completely dark, I lit candles ..", Cordelia defended herself. You shook your head in amusement and washed your face.

"You're sweating .." Cordelia remarked, referring to the sweat stains on your shirt. "Didn't sleep so well .." you replied curtly. "I guess you don't want to sleep again either ..?" "Nope .." You turned back to her.

"Well ... then I would love it if you kept me company here," Delia said and smiled again. You shook your head again, just grinning, before you pulled your shirt over your head and went to the tub to get into the water. Cordelia sat down so that you were sitting in front of her and your body was leaning against her bare torso. She carefully put her arms around your torso and rested her chin on your head. You lay down for a few minutes Just there and you would probably have fallen asleep had she not spoken.

"Mina told us about your dropout this afternoon .."

Of course she did..

You closed your eyes "Why don't you just tell us what's going on Y / N?" She began softly. "We're really really worried." "I can't Delia .. I've never talked about it .." you whispered. "So do you admit something is wrong?" You snorted. "Of course something is wrong .. I hit Mina."

"You know that she's not angry with you, she's just worried as I said .. You know, no matter what is on your mind, we all suffer with you, no matter whether you tell us what's going on or not .. ", Delia said and ran her wet fingers through your hair. You just nodded at her words. "You could only tell one of us if that helps you.", She offered, although she knew that this would also bring new problems. "No, I trust you all .. It's just that, as I said, I've never told anyone about it. I am just afraid of your reaction .. "you said.

"Oh y / n ..", she sighed and turned your head so that she could look you in the eye. "No matter what happened, we love you so much and nothing could change that ..". Again you nodded.

Then suddenly she got up and grabbed a towel. "What are you doing?" You asked confused when you watched her get out of the tub and dry off. "You pull the plug and get dressed ... Meanwhile, I'll wake Ally and Mina, we'll finally talk to each other .." she said and put her nightgown back on before she ran out of the bathroom.

"You won't do that, it's the middle of the night .." you shouted after her.

"I know."

You climbed out of the bathtub, trembling, and drained the water. You dried yourself off quickly and got dressed. Before you left the room, you took a quick look in the mirror. You looked like you were going to cry any minute.

"We're in the living room, Y / N .." Cordelia suddenly called. For a moment you closed your eyes, then you slowly walked into your common living room. Your 3 friends sat on the sofa and stared at you expectantly. Cordelia sat with her legs crossed, her hair wet and her short nightgown on the right end. Ally was sitting cross-legged to her left. Clad in a T-shirt and shorts, she narrowed her eyes against the light. And at the other end sat Mina, in her purple pajamas, her long red hair curling on the fabric. Her left hand held her walking stick and, as always, her gaze seemed to shine through you.

You sat in the chair in front of them when Ally held out her hand to you. "This is not a fucking interrogation Y / N ..". You carefully took her hand and she pulled you between Delia and herself. You stared nervously into your lap and played with your fingers. You could still feel their expectant looks.

"Oz looks like my little brother ..." you suddenly let out. "Is that all?" Ally asked confused. "No .." you shook your head and waited a few seconds. "..my childhood wasn't that great ... my mom had a big drinking problem I guess..". "And your father?" Cordelia asked. "Uhm, well ... he hit us when we didn't do things the way he wanted ..."

Briefly there was silence in the room. "That's awful Y / N, but what does this have to do with my son ..?" Ally finally asked.

"My brother committed suicide when he was 15 because of my parents .." you said and heard Ally take a shaky breath. "And actually I had repressed all of that over the years and when I saw Oz ... I only saw Leo ...".

You got up and walked to an unpacked box with your things. You came back with a picture, which you put into Delia's hand. It was a family photo. Delia stared hard at the photo. "Your father had a walking stick .." she said suddenly and you instinctively looked at Mina, who was staring lost at the floor. Her grip on her own walking stick had tightened so much that you could be afraid it would be squeezed by her fingers. "His left leg wasn't healthy ... that's why he hobbled ...". Delia passed the photo on to Ally, who only had eyes for the blond boy next to you. "Well .. he actually looks a bit like Oz ..", Ally only mumbled and wanted to pass the picture on to Mina, but she just shook her head. "I do not want to see this..".

Again there was brief silence and again Ally was the one breaking it. "When I told you about Ivy and said I don't want any secrets between us, I actually assumed you'd think that way too..That's why I'm kind of angry Y / N..I mean, Do you don't trust us?"

You just wanted to speak, when Cordelia came before you. "She wasn't ready yet, Ally..She-" "Cordelia, I asked Y / N and not you .." Ally hissed.

"I've never told anyone about it ..." was all you said. "But we're not just anyone .." Ally sounded disappointed. "I didn't want you guys to think wrong of me .." you said softly. Cordelia leaned forward and grabbed your hand. "What happened is not your fault .. it was your brother's decision and your parents' fault .." "But maybe I could have done more .." you whispered, tears gathering in your eyes. Cordelia just sighed and pulled you into her lap. You leaned your back against her chest and listened for her heartbeat.

"And what was yesterday?" Asked Ally. "Something must have triggered your strange behavior .." "My mother texted me .. she does that every year on my birthday .." you said.

"It was your birthday?" Ally looked at you with raised eyebrows.

You nodded briefly and made Ally moan in frustration. "If you don't even tell us that anymore, then-" "She said she would come here next week because she has to see a doctor .. She wants to meet with me .." you interrupted her. "But I don't want to see her ..", you felt tears running down your face.

Ally just shook her head and crossed her arms over her chest.

"You should have talked to us much earlier Y / N ..", Mina finally said. "Even if this is all new now, we are a family and it is our job to make sure that you are okay. We would never have left you alone with Oz, had we known about your brother .. Not just about you to protect, but also because of Oz's safety. It's important that we trust each other, we've all been through complicated things .. " You nodded guiltily again.

Cordelia cleared her throat. "The scars on your back, you told us they were from a car accident, is that true?" "No .." you said. Suddenly you felt Delia's cool fingers pulling up your shirt and exposing your scars. "Delia what-" "Shut up, Y / N .." They'd all seen your scars before, but knowing that those scars were someone's craft, made them look a lot more brutal when Delia gently ran her fingers over them. "Did he? ..- asked Mina. You nodded and tears fell into your lap as you let out a sob. "I'm sorry," you said, holding a hand over your mouth to stifle your sobs.

"Damn Y / N, stop apologizing ..". Ally jumped up, stood in front of Delia and you, pressed your head against her flat stomach and rubbed your upper back with her hand. Delia's fingers continued to slide to the scars on your side. "Was that him too?" She asked softly. "No .." you answered. "Then who was it? Your moth-" "It was her, Delia .." Mina interrupted her with closed eyes. How could they have been so blind? Such scars did not appear in car accidents.

"Is that true Y / N?", Cordelia's voice trembled when she asked. "I'm so sorry .." you sniffed at Ally's shirt. "Back then I didn't know how to deal with everything .." "Shhh princess .." Ally cooed. "Please finally stop apologizing for something you can't do anything about .."

"Honey, do you still hurt yourself sometimes?" Asked Mina, who had slipped up to you and put her hand on yours.

"I've stopped doing that since Leo's death .. I think he saw me with a knife sometimes ..". The thought of it brought new tears to your eyes and made you sob one more time.

Cordelia pulled the fabric of your shirt back down before leaning her head on your back and wrapping your arms around your waist. Mina, who was sitting next to Delia, was the only one who could see her tears as she reached out her hand to gently run through Delia's hair. "Some things are going to change now, Y / N .." she said firmly. "We'll be more careful about some things and we'll also have to see how we deal with Oz without it being uncomfortable for him or you. I'll contact your mother and make it clear to her that you don't want any more contact. We can't stop Oz looking the way he looks, but we'll help you deal with it because that's what we're here for .. ". Her thumb brushed the back of your hand, which was in her lap. That was the last thing that was said that night, but you stayed in that position for a long time. You in the midst of your worried lover

[trashlie]

!!! i hadn’t thought of it that way! that mls usually have those “masculine” characteristics while the second male leads are just “friends” because they’re more gentle etc. that’s very interesting!! i never actually saw nolan as the second male lead but it did feel like the people around him and shinae constantly manipulated things around them to separate them, or the circumstances often made them keep distance, but just them specifically and forcing him to stay passive(? i never saw kousuke as the love interest but i’ve heard that many assumed it was like that, i was surprised that i had ignored how he was supposed to be imitating those tropes!! i was too focused on yeonggi to notice ☠️ but now i see why people would be drawn towards kousuke ahahaha

Omg if you ever look at webtoon comments (don't it's a nightmare lmao) it's incredible how many people are convinced from the get go that Kousuke is a love interest despite no indication of it. In fact, that was the thing I discovered re: Nol when reading without a romantic lens, too; he doesn't seem to reveal as a romantic option for a long time, either, and the things that reveal him as one are mostly circumstantial and rooted in the presentation of his feelings and gleaned from his actions. We're all literally just out here hoping that we're actually on to something lmao. But also I don't see Kousuke as a love interest, not because I don't ship it, but because textually it doesn't seem supported. I know this can be because Shinae is still under age, so any romantic moments are not going to happen right now, but consider that technically Nol and Shinae haven't really had "romantic" moments, either. Again, it's circumstantial, it's clues given to us between the lines.

Anyway what I'm getting at re: Kousuke is I feel like we've been given a lot of instances that show compared to Nol that Kousuke doesn't really understand Shinae. Yes, things can change in the timeskip, but can they change that much? The motif of Kousuke never quite understanding Shinae (even when she makes it obvious!) has been reiterated as recently as episodes 141 through 143 when he tries to talk her into remaining his assistant. I know people have argued that Shinae would be a fool to walk away from a position like hers, but here's the thing: she is a minor who was tricked into a position well above her skill level, who has to work around her abusers who she made it apparent cause her discomfort, she feels out of her league, and she was forced to take etiquette classes just to fit in. No mater how good the pay, if your job makes you feel stifled or if you feel miserable, find something better. In fact, in this episode Kousuke feels more like he's being her parent, telling her to stick with something, acting like he knows what's best for her when: he didn't even know what clothes are best for her; he didn't think her capable of customer service; he didn't even talk to her about how she was lacking and immediately put her in etiquette classes.

Honestly, that aspect alone is what makes me feel like we aren't supposed to view him as a romantic interest. That, coupled with the realization that much of Kou's interest in Shinae seems to stem from repressed remorse towards Nol about how he treated him (if he treats Shinae better will it make his guilt go away? Will it make him feel bigger? On the contrary, we see that Shinae questioning Kou's lifestyle only brings the Nol comparisons out more). That's what's so interesting to me: that as more and more the incompatibility is revealed, the more we start to realize that he was never presented as a romantic interest, it was just assumed he was. And idk I love that but I guess if I shipped those two maybe I would hate it? lol I just like how the storytelling carefully reveals things that were there all along but we were perceiving wrongly.

Also re: the "masculine" traits of first and second leads. Think about the reasons Nol has been casted by some into the friend role and what it says about his traits vs Kousuke's. This isn't a dig at people who favor men with a lot of masculine traits, but rather a thing I found interesting and explained why I was drawn to characters other readers would cast as friends. Obviously, there's some clever subversion of even this with Nol and Kousuke - Nol's anger is not a gentle thing in the least, Kousuke enjoys very refined hobbies. But at any rate, it always felt to me that characters who tend to be emotionally in tune with an MC esp compared to a first lead who is cold, closed off, and repeated hurts the MC always felt like it was regarded as somehow "not manly enough" even though.... isn't that what we want from romance? People who are emotionally in tune with us? But this is why I started to avoid love triangles lmao I hated the idea that the kind of guys I favored were somehow "inferior" lmaoooo

Also lol thinking about the subversion of the typical second lead, often they hesitate of their own accord - they're not ready to say anything, they're passive people, etc. Nol's "passivity" is straight up due to extenuating factors: Kousuke has made him stay away with Shinae, his own belief that he's not really good enough for her/a danger to her, his best friend likes her already, she made it clear at one point they are just friends, he has a girlfriend. The passive second lead is played nearly straight, just.... not of his own volition exactly lol

[silverschaos]

Something About You / Draco Malfoy x Reader

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Reader Description: After a rough week, you have one two many butterbeers and get help from the last person you’d expect. Warnings: being tipsy?? Word Count: 1437 A/N: idk what this is but i wanted to write something fluffy/nice since the last one was angst central.

Weekends meant Hogsmeade trips which were always your favourite part of the week. There was nothing like getting out of the school grounds for a bit. As much as you loved Hogwarts, it was nice to get away sometimes even if it was only for a few hours. It was even nicer after a stressful week and to say this week had been stressful was an understatement. Right from the get go everything had seemed to be going wrong. You’d managed to forget your potions homework which had resulted in detention then because of that you’d missed your date with Seamus. It hadn’t been that big of a deal — it wasn’t like your relationship was serious but you had liked him. It wasn’t enough for you to be upset when he asked if you two could just stay friends instead but it did put you in a foul mood. It seemed that every time you had something good planned the world tried it’s best to disrupt it. So, the trip to Hogsmeade was needed.

Usually, you tagged along with the golden trio but you decided to go solo today telling them that you’d meet them for a drink later on before you all headed back to the castle. As you walked through the main road, you spotted Draco Malfoy and his goons harassing some third year. You and Draco hadn’t really interacted much other than the casual ‘hello’ here and there but he’d always been rather polite around you so why couldn’t he be like that with everyone else? You knew your friends had an issue with him and couldn’t blame them but you had nothing against him. So far he’d done nothing to you but it did annoy you to see him bullying a poor, defenceless boy just trying to enjoy a day out.

“Hey, come on. Leave him alone,” you said walking up to where the incident was happening. Goyle was the first to hear you, turning to face you with the ugliest sneer on his face.

“Back off, (Y/N). This is none of your business,” he said gruffly.

“What exactly has he done to deserve you bothering him? Just leave him alone. You’re a sixth year and he’s a third. Pick on someone your own size.”

“I said back off.”

“Goyle! That’s no way to talk to a lady.” Draco had finally spoken up, glaring at his friend. “Since you asked so kindly (Y/N) we’ll let little Roger here be on his way.”

“Thank you,” you gave Draco the tiniest of smiles as little Roger ran past putting a ‘thanks’ to you.

With that all sorted out, you went on your way not noticing the youngest Malfoy watching you as you did. He’d always found you intriguing. Honestly, he’d always wanted to strike up a conversation with you but since you were in two completely different houses and he had a reputation to maintain, he opted for mostly ignoring you and trying to be civil. Part of him really hated the fact that he couldn’t just do the things he wanted to but he couldn’t take any chances of his father hearing about him doing such things. Befriending someone outside of Slytherin house was frowned upon so keeping his distance was his only option but little did he know that was about to change.

*****

“Barkeep, another!” You yelled out earning funny looks from Harry, Ron and Hermione. You’d been sat with them for half an hour now and had already thrown back about four butterbeers. They didn’t even know how many you’d had before they’d arrived but it was safe to say that with the amount you’d had, you were pretty darn tipsy.

“Maybe you should make this your last one,” Hermione suggested, reaching out to place her hand on yours in a comforting manner. “I know you’ve had a tough week but if you want to talk then I’m here.”

All you did was shoot her a big, toothy grin in thanks as your new drink was placed in front of you. “It’s not like I’m sad or anything. I just… need to blow off some steam, you know? When have you known me to get tipsy off butter beer anyway? It’s just one time. It’s fine.”

After another half an hour, Harry declared that he wanted to go back to the castle with Hermione and Ron agreeing. They tried to get you to go with them but you refused telling them you’d make your own way back. Harry had tried to pull you up and drag you with them knowing you weren’t exactly sober but you were too stubborn to budge. Ron had somehow convinced them you were smart enough to know what you were doing and with that they left.

It was one drink later when you’d finally decided you’d had enough, getting up out of your seat. But, you’d stood up too fast and with the butterbeer in your system it didn’t help one bit, the whole room spinning. You gripped the chair with one hand to steady yourself.

“You doing okay?” A familiar voice asked you. Your eyes glanced up to meet none other than Draco’s.

“I’ll be honest, blondie, I might have drank a little too much,” you said and couldn’t help but grin at him.

“I can tell.” He pondered for a moment almost having an internal battle with himself before he decided he had to be a decent human being and help you out. “Here,” he said, grabbing your jacket it and helping you put it on. He held his arm out for you. You didn’t even argue lacing your arm through it so he could help you back up to the castle.

The first few moments were silent until you spoke up curious as to why Draco Malfoy of all people was helping you out. “Got a feeling you don’t really do this much especially when I caught you bullying a poor innocent boy earlier.”

“You’d be right but contrary to popular belief, I’m actually a decent guy. I have manners and know when to not leave a lady alone in your state,” he mumbled.

“I’m not that drunk, you know. Just tipsy.”

“Tipsy enough for me to be concerned and it takes a lot to concern me. Why’d you even drink that much anyway? It takes a lot of butter beers to get anyone drunk. Rough day?”

“Try rough week.”

“Is this about that imbecile Seamus? You can do much better,” Draco pulled a disgusted face at the mere sound of his name coming out of his mouth. At your confused look, he went on to explain. “I was walking past when you two were having a chat. Complete idiot he is if you ask me.”

A little laugh passed by your lips. “Don’t hide how you really feel. But, yeah and no. He and I weren’t even really together. It was just an culmination of things coming together all week. I’m fine, though.”

He looked at you to examine your face for any signs that you were lying but he couldn’t find any. You really did seem okay which was a relief to him. The last thing he wanted was to have some deep hearted conversation. It was a shock to him and you that he was even talking to you as much as he was.

Silence took over again as you reached the castle. Although, you didn’t want to admit it being in his company felt nice. Natural, even. You felt comfortable even when it was silent. There wasn’t any awkwardness. If you didn’t know any better you’d think you actually liked being in Draco’s company. He liked being in yours too but he was nowhere near comfortable enough to admit that.

“Thanks for walking me back. You’re alright, Malfoy,” you gave him a playful nudge with your shoulder causing a slight grin to form on his face. Funny, you’d never really seen him smile before. It looked good on him.

“You too, (Y/N). I meant it, by the way. You can do much better than most of the boys in this retched school.”

“Are you about to make some overly dramatic speech and ask me out?”

This time a large, hearty chuckle came from him and you couldn’t help but feel a little hint of butterflies start up that you’d been the one to get that out of him. Draco shook his head. “You wish but who knows what the future holds, eh? See you around, (Y/N).”

With a wink, he headed on into the castle. Well, now you couldn’t wait to bump into your new favourite Slytherin more often.

[midethefangirl]

Captain America: Civil War - My Thoughts

I know this is like 5 years late but for this, I’d like to resurrect a barely dead discourse that succeeded in not just dividing the Avengers but also dividing the fandom. Before we start, content warning for spoilers and let’s dive into this mess.

So, basically, the entire conflict of civil war stemmed from General Thaddeus Ross (who is a hypocritical dick, btw) coming to lecture the Avengers on being destructive despite conducting destructive experiments (ahem, the Abomination and the Hulk) but I digress. Then, Ross presents the Sokovian Accords which is really lengthy and we see Steve reading like a few chapters(?). Now, let us note that the Accords were presented to the Avengers after a mission-gone-wrong killed about 11 people in Lagos (lay-gos, not lah-gos that pronunciation gave me headaches as a Nigerian).

So, the Sokovian Accords were written by 117 countries and vetted by the UN asking for the Avengers to be under oversight (which SHIELD would have done if HYDRA hadn’t infiltrated it in the first place but it is what it is). Somehow, Steve made it about “our right to choose” (how?! Cause I’m not understanding) and decided to not sign*.

*he later got back to sign, then backed out when he learnt that Tony had placed Wanda under house arrest (even though it was for her protection. I do believe Tony should have fully informed Wanda about keeping her in the Avengers’ Tower)

My issues with the plot of Civil War are:

1. The Sokovian Accords were not read out loud or placed on some kind of PowerPoint slide for the audience to understand why Team Cap is against the Accords. No, the fandom wiki is not a source because that one is from Agents of SHIELD and not a lot of MCU fans are familiar with that show (yours sincerely included). Assuming the contents were read out loud or discussed by the Avengers, I’d have understood why Team Cap refused to sign the accords but since none of that was given, I’d remain Team Iron Man for this one.

2. The Sokovian Accords is not the American Constitution. Then again, the MCU fandom tends to be American-centric and most Americans seem to have this belief that the world revolves around them (and it manifests itself in Civil War discourse).

3. Contrary to popular opinion, the Sokovian Accords were about 117 (mostly third-world) countries asserting their sovereignty and boundaries, not taking away rights from the Avengers. If we go by what the MCU wiki claims about the accords, yes, some parts are absurd (like asking for blood samples and using trackers, why are those necessary?). However, when 117 countries state that they want you to respect their boundaries, I think it is best to comply. Unfortunately, respecting boundaries is one thing the USA has a problem complying with and guess who happens to represent America?

4. The Accords affected only their hero lives, not their lives as a civilian. I doubt the UN would limit the Avengers’ movements as civilians

5. Let us not forget how Steve and Clint protect Wanda from accountability and responsibility. Wanda in the MCU is like y/n in many fanfics where everyone (except for the “big bad villain” who in this case is Tony and 117 countries) seems to love her and want to protect her from facing the consequences of her actions. Anyone *ahem Tony* who has a bit of problem with her is suddenly the enemy. Not to mention how Wanda seems to have a knack for causing destruction in African countries (Johannesburg, Lagos, Wakanda)

6. And fandom behaviour from the Team Cap stans

7. Also, why is Civil War not an Avengers part 3? It’s better than making it a Captain America trilogy and then trying to frame Steve as being right.

8. I do believe that the accords were sped up which left little time for the Avengers to discuss and compromise on certain issues. If they were given more time to discuss, compromise and negotiate, I think the movie would have ended better than it had.

9. In addition, I also agree with Team Cap stans on how the UN arbitrarily deciding to shoot Bucky on sight is a human right violation.

10. “The safest hands are our own” why does this sound like a white saviour talk point from Steve? The accords is about 117 countries wanting you to respect their boundaries and the best you can come up with to refute that is saying something a white saviour would say?

11. “Even if the whole world is telling you to move...” just shut the fuck up, this is no way comparable to 117 countries trying to assert their sovereignty.

12. Look if I have to choose between surrendering a few rights as a hero and just dismissing that of civilians as potential damage, I’d go with the former because the people whom I’m suppose to protect come first. For me to dismiss their deaths as “we can’t save em all” is just not it.

13. “She’s just a kid”, a few years later and I still hate that term. One, it’s infantilizing an adult white woman (something white men have historically done and we all know how that went) . Two, while Tony was obviously wrong for not informing Wanda about her house arrest, he was right to keep her in the Tower when they were people who would harm her with every chance they could find. **

** after watching WandaVision, some people might find every reason to want to harm her.

14. Let us also discuss the motivation of those in Team Iron Man vs Team Cap

Team Iron Man

Tony: feels guilty for the events of Age of Ultron, believes that he’s stepped out of line and the Avengers need oversight.

Natasha: believes that the Avengers should listen to the public and the UN after all, if they had one hand on the wheel, they can still steer.

Vision: believes that the Avengers as a whole bring challenge which brings conflict and then catastrophe.

Rhodey: a soldier; believes in following orders especially when it is from the UN and 117 countries.

T’Challa: dude is just there to kill Bucky. I’m sure if Bucky was on team Ironman, my guy would have joined team cap, lmao 😂.

Spider-Man: not really there for a reason except to bring in Steve to Ross. I do agree that Tony shouldn’t have dragged him to the fight without Peter making an informed decision.

Team Cap

Steve: didn’t want to sign because it takes away his “right to choose”. Idk what that means or how it is relevant to the Sokovian Accords but okay. However, I understand his mistrust considering a few movies ago, we found out HYDRA had infiltrated SHIELD and as much as I believe governments are corrupt and the UN is shit, you cannot just enter a country anyhow without warning ahead of time.

Bucky: was his motivation given? I mean, I believe he joined Steve’s side to stop Zeno from unleashing the other winter soldiers. Not that that’s a bad reason, it isn’t.

Sam: again, I don’t think the movie gave us a reason for him being against the Accords. Did he also believe it was taking away his “right to choose”?

Wanda: undecided as of moment of discussion. Joined team cap because Tony placed her on house arrest. While I agree that Tony should have informed her that he was putting her under house arrest and stated the reasons why, I believe it was for good reasons especially when some people might decide to carry out witch hunts (you get it, witch hunts? 😅)

Clint: only joined because Wanda was placed under house arrest. We aren’t given any reason why he would oppose the Accords.

Scott: fan boy of Captain America, need I say more?

15. Also, to Team Cap stans blaming Tony Stark for Team Cap being imprisoned, grow the fuck up. The people in Team Cap are all adults who made their own decisions yet Tony is to blame for them breaking the law (because they did break the law), wtf.

16. “Are you capable of letting go of your ego for one damn second?” Like Steve’s ego didn’t play a part in all this too, lmao.

17. Okay, the final battle was intense and while I believe Bucky was also a victim, I can understand why Tony lashed out at him. The one to blame here is Steve because even if he had no clue Bucky was responsible for the Starks’ death, he still lied to Tony by not telling him who was responsible. It is more appalling to learn that Steve, in an attempt to “protect Tony and Bucky”, was actually covering for HYDRA!

Also, the way Steve stood emotionless while Tony watched a footage of his parents being killed. Yet, he could shield Wanda from watching the news because of how it affected her, okay.

“I can do this all day”, fuck you, Steve

18. Clint exploding at Tony is so fucking hilarious. Tony is right, Clint has a family yet he decided to fight in a war that didn’t concern him. Also, his comments about breaking backs is so tone deaf after Rhodey just broke his back!

19. If Sam was Captain America, I think Civil War wouldn’t have happened at all, from the dialogue in the Raft.

20. Overall, this movie is a fucking mess and I hate it for dividing both the Avengers and MCU fans.

Before I close with this, I want to add that I am not anti-Steve but Civil War really made me hate him. I get, Steve is supposed to be a Boy Scout and shit like that, but he’s a Gary Stu in the MCU, let’s be honest about it. Civil War should have been an Avengers movie, rather than a part of the Captain America trilogy. The Avengers should have been given more time than three days to discuss the Accords and make necessary amendments; after all that went down in Lagos, Wanda should have been made to sit out missions and maybe we could have had someone like Doctor Strange help in training her; Crossbones would have made a great villain but it is what it is; Peter’s introduction to the MCU could have been as him actually interning for the Stark Industries and forming a kind of acquaintance with Tony Stark before Tony finds out that he’s Spider-Man; Steve should have told Tony about HYDRA‘s hands in his parents’ deaths. Anyway, I’ll go read Civil War fix-it fanfics and fanfics where the Avengers are more like family. Fuck Civil War and I’m outta here.

Edit: okay this was a thought I had when I was trying to sleep but it was too good to ignore. Rhodey has a point about Steve arrogance (if that’s the correct term) in saying “the safest hands are our own” and here’s why:

Like he stated “this is not the World Security Council...neither is this SHIELD nor HYDRA” (paraphrased). This is the UN as well as 117 countries. Look, I am as anti-government as one can go and I don’t believe that the UN are reliable (plus, if we really want to go by the AoS version of the Accords, the Accords are flawed and they need amendments), however, given the US records on disrespecting boundaries in many third world countries, I can understand why 117 countries are wary about a bunch of superpowered Americans entering their country.

To us, the Avengers are saving the world. To these 117 countries and the people who have families who were killed in the crossfire (Zemo is a good example), the Avengers are a bunch of nuisances who leave destruction wherever they tread.

I am still neutral on the whole Accords as I don’t know exactly what it entails but for Steve to go “we are surrendering our rights to choose” (again, how is the Accords threatening the Avengers’ right to choose?) when asked to be under oversight is tone deaf.

[anzcty]

Analysing Episode 6 Sylvie - her actions, her choice and a whole bunch of theories (Spoilers!)

After watching the Loki finale, I have been scrolling through Tumblr for quite a long time. I already knew that people's opinions were gonna be incredibly different but I definitely did not expect this much negative backlash. Especially when it comes to two specific topics - the Sylvie and Loki kiss and Sylvie's betrayal (/choice/actions). I'm gonna be talking about the latter, for it is another time I'll talk a lot about Sylki's relationship. (Beware that this post is also really long though)

First of all, everyone has different opinions and I respect that. I absolutely adore movies, books, TV-shows and videogames because despite what's happening within the story, each viewer has the opportunity to see something else in what they are shown (besides the obvious canon). What I mean is that everyone interprets certain scenes differently and gains the opportunity to make up theories. Therefore I want to clarify that I do, by no means, want to force my views upon others. It's nice to see people talk about the Loki Series (as long as it doesn't get too negative and hateful, iykwim) because every viewer can share their specific experiences with it :)

I'm gonna analyse Sylvie's character a bit ( because, well, I'm bored and I kinda wanna protect my beloved character that I've only had for a few weeks >:^0 AND the only thing I could think about the past day was this episode) and try to explain her actions in the finale (keep in mind: not justifying them, but explaining them).

I'm terribly bad at concentrating on one single topic point so I kinda made a 'list' with questions and whatnot that I wanted to dive deeper into. Your thoughts are also more than welcome!

I already want to apologise for grammatical mistakes, for I am not a native english speaker.

Sylvie's reason for being taken away by the TVA is still kinda unknown

You know, I've heard quite a few theories about Sylvie's nexus event by now. Some people say that she got taken away because she was playing with her toys in a way that indicates her having a good heart (playing as a Valkyrie and wanting to save someone, another hint may also be the reaction she showed towards someone else who got kidnapped by the TVA, yelling at the soldiers to "help them out"). Another theory is that she already knew she was adopted, unlike Loki who found out way later than her. Please correct me if I'm wrong, but we never got to hear the actual reason why Sylvie got kidnapped. Even Renslayer didn't say a word about it.

Now I'm gonna come up with yet another theory. What if Sylvie didn't really have a nexus event in the first place how we know it? In the final episode, Kang has said that he has planned out everything beforehand so both Loki and Sylvie would end up right in front of him. Did Kang's plan also possibly involve him getting killed by Sylvie? Hear me out: We don't actually know if the Kang we saw in episode 6 is the actual 'nice' Kang and not one of his evil variants. He has already talked about 'reincarnation', so who says that after ending the first universial war, Kang didn't reincarnate into someone with an unpure heart (aka, one of his evil variants)? That'd mean that the real Kang would have been killed and the Kang we've seen in the finale is actually an evil version that simply lied to both Loki and Sylvie. Besides that, we also don't know if Kang actually had that 'point' where he didn't know what would happen next. The show revolves a whole lot around trust, not only regarding the characters, but also the viewers. Who's to say that Kang said the truth? Maybe he planned it all out: He created the TVA, let Sylvie get kidnapped and therefore give her a reason to hunt after Kang, who in return could reincarnate if he got killed OR get killed and therefore give his other variants a possibility to conquer the universes yet again. Don't you think that it was kinda suspicious that Sylvie escaped so easily out of Renslayer's hands? The one person who's probably closest to Kang? (Even though, yes, she doesn't know who he is but Renslayer seems to play a very important role in his plan). What if the Kang we saw was the nice Kang though? Would he plan everything up to a point where another universial war would break out because he might know that there is indeed something/someone out there who could end it and therefore, possibly end Kang as a whole or create a new kind of system revolving around the universe? And therefore, get rid of the possibility of another universial war happening? Who knows. I am definitely overthinking and reaching at this point. One more thing that stood out to me while thinking about the episode again today (which kinda weighs more into my theory of Sylvie being a keypoint (or rather a puppet) in this plan): Kang has talked about his Tempad and that he knew that he would need it to have enough energy. But for what? Yes, his initial idea was to give it to Loki and Sylvie to rule over the TVA, but what if it was supposed to be used for another reason? Sylvie used it to transport Loki back to the TVA (though I kinda think he was accidentally transported to another timeline, hence the reactions of both Mobius and Hunter B-15) and therefore get rid of the only thing that could prevent Sylvie from killing Kang. The Tempad was used to secure Sylvie's path and therefore eradicated Kang's only option of safety. You can see the Tempad loosing it's glow after Kang was killed, possibly due to Kang himself being the origin of it's energy. But maybe, it only had enough energy for one specific action: getting rid of Kang's protection. I do think that Sylvie is now stuck at this place and somehow has to find a way back to Loki's reality. The Tempad clearly doesn't work anymore (at least in my opinion) and there was quite a long shot showing the Tempad up close, which is kinda suspicious tbh. Also, something regarding Sylvie's unanswered nexus event feels kinda odd to me, too.

My theory in conclusion: Sylvie (and Loki) are unconciously helping Kang with his plan (a big, big, BIG plan). They're his puppets, especially Sylvie, because she's the one who created the Multiverse to begin with. Think about Loki, who was said to be manipulated by Thanos in Avengers? It's basically the same train of thoughts.

Sylvie does not take Kang's offer into consideration

To be honest, this was something to be absolutely expected of her. Sylvie was kidnapped as a child, taken away from her home and family, and had to grow up in countless apocalypses where she could never form a real bond with anybody because she knew that those people were all going to die anyway. (Please don't judge me if I got that wrong, maybe I understood the next thing wrong? Idk, if so, I'm very sorry) She revealed that she was kidnapped way before Loki was even born (something I have to think about, too, because, if Loki is the actual Loki the other variants are based off, why did he exist after Sylvie? Wouldn't that make him a variant of Sylvie instead? Idk timelines and parallel universes are hard to understand for me :') I'm kinda stoopid ), therefore she must've had spent several decades of her life running away. She had no life at all. Her only goal was to bring down the TVA and whoever is behind it, driven by pure rage, seeking out revenge for stealing her life and basically forbidding her existence. And now that she has found said person, the only thing that'd be right for her character would be to go for the kill. As immoral as it may sound, it is the only thing that makes sense. And I am actually very happy that Sylvie's goals didn't change besides the fact that she did indeed soften up a little and has gotten someone really close to her. In contrary, it makes sense for Loki to do the exact opposite. His goals have changed. He does not act the way he did in Thor or Avengers anymore. He has found another goal for himself: to make Sylvie feel alright. He has had immense character growth and didn't take a chance to change his goals back in the Thor movies or in Avengers, (....maybe later in Thor: Ragnarok, kinda). This is exactly what I think might happen to Sylvie, too. She is at the beginning of her character arc. She doesn't take the chance to change her goal, but goes for her original goal instead. Said goal does not really have positive consequences (though, maybe it might have some? We're about to find out), which results in a so called 'negative character development', which Loki has already gone through. I think that Sylvie is gonna grow as a character in season 2 and get a positive character development in addition, just like Loki did. I highly doubt that she's gonna become the antagonist, it does not make sense at this point.

Why does she not take Kang's offer (besides her very obvious intention ofc)? That leads straight (or not so straight, pun intended) to the next thing I wanna talk about. Sylvie's distrust in everything and everyone. Besides not wanting to let other people go through what she has been gone through and wanting to let people have a free will, she also does not trust Kang with his offer of 'ruling' the timeline. And it might be because she also does not trust the one she'd be ruling with: Loki.

Why does Sylvie not trust Loki?

I don't even have a specific answer to that, except that Sylvie has an incredibly thick wall built up around her. Loki has always been portrayed as the one you should not trust because he's known for backstabbing people. Loki could have thought the same about Sylvie, but he didn't. Due to his character arc, he himself has learned to trust other people and tries to redeem himself with making himself a person others can trust (He may project that onto Sylvie, meaning that he puts his trust into a Loki variant and therefore in himself, too). You can connect that fact with both Sylvie and Mobius. They're both people who are incredibly important to Loki. He wants them to trust him. He openly told Sylvie about his mistakes and tells her that he's not that person anymore. Sylvie on the other hand does not trust that easily and is - in my opinion - a very important key regarding Loki's character development. It is incredibly hard for Sylvie to trust others (probably due to her trauma) and it therefore creates a very difficult situation for Loki, where he has to 'prove' himself as trustworthy. It's basically about 'trusting yourself' if you put it that way. It's something Loki has to learn about himself: not betraying the trust of others. Sylvie might have to learn something like this, too: learning to trust someone else. It's kinda like a two sided coin - one side is about putting trust in others, whereas the other is about gaining trust from others (and what you do with it). (Good) Relationships in general are always based off trust and honesty. So in order for them to be able to have healthy relationships with others and themselves, they have to learn about trust within themselves (I hope you understand my point, I got carried away, sorry). Loki started to trust Sylvie very easily (maybe because of love? Maybe because of something else? There are still a lot of unanswered questions) whereas Sylvie doesn't trust Loki very easily. Sylvie's character arc might (hopefully) carry on with this topic in the next season.

Was that kiss initiated due to emotional or practical reasons?

Kinda both, somehow. I do think that Sylvie used the kiss to her advantage but you can also clearly see how moved she is while hearing Loki's words. Facial expressions are insanely important when it comes to acting and both Tom and Sophia delivered perfectly. You might've already heard of the quote "The eyes tell more than words could ever say". Look at Sylvie's face when Loki tells her that he wants her to be okay. She is teary eyed, sighs even. She is indeed touched by his words and I strongly think that Sylvie also has non-platonic feelings for Loki, despite barely showing anything.

Here's a snippet out of an interview with Sophia:

(Source)

Both Sylvie and Loki are said to be people who can not trust others. They both have a vulnerable side though. Loki clearly showed that several times when with Sylvie (singing to her, the blanket scene, the comfort scene in the room of the timekeepers, the confession of wanting her to be okay) and is also shown incredibly vulnerable at the end of episode 6: there are several shots showing him, crying. Sure, we have already seen Loki cry a few times beforehand but this time, it's different. He cries because the one person he is the most vulnerable with doesn't trust him, and that does hurt like hell. By the way, if you look at the close-up shot of Sylvie after she yeeted Loki back into the TVA, you can see pain in her eyes, too. But that pain quickly shifts into rage and determination. Something that I have to admit was incredibly well executed by Sophia and the people who directed this shot. Sylvie does show her vulnerable side for a brief moment before putting up her walls again and reaching for her goal.

In conclusion: I think Sylvie initiated the kiss as an emotional response to Loki's words but also used it to distract him to be able to kick him back into the TVA at the same time. Keep in mind that it was because he was in her way of fullfilling her goal. She didn't want to kill or hurt him, so she sent him away instead. So, yes, I think the kiss had both emotional and practical intentions.

Did Sylvie betray Loki?

Even though it really felt like she betrayed him, she didn't. Let me tell you why:

Loki knew exactly what Sylvie was gonna do after reaching the person behind the TVA. Loki supported her all the way up until Kang suggested a deal to them, that's where Loki's and Sylvie's paths divided. Loki is a very smart character, he outsmarts a lot of Marvel characters and therefore I think it's very in character for him to consider one part of the deal and outweigh the pros and cons. Not because he wants the throne, no, but because he wants Sylvie to be okay. A universial war could lead to countless casualties - possibly those people close around him, so of course he would want to keep her safe through that decision. Making them both rulers over the TVA and the sacred timeline would probably guarantee a strong protection from several threats. Also, maybe he thought about the possibility of Sylvie regretting her decision (which she clearly did in the end) and wanted to protect her from even more emotional pain. But as we know, Sylvie's intention has always been laid out in front of her and it didn't change. Loki knew what choice she was going to make and merely tried to change her way - without being successfull.

I don't really know what to think about this scene though. To me, it doesn't meet the requirements of a 'betrayal' but at the same time it does feel like one. It's very difficult to explain :'D

Also, I've seen some people asking themselves how or if Loki will ever be able to forgive Sylvie for making her decision. Let me assure you one thing: he will forgive her. He has said it himself: "I know what you're feeling, I know what you're going through". He has been at Sylvie's point, too. Not only once, but several times already. He seems to have learned from his mistakes, Sylvie has yet to do so. ("I betrayed everyone I've ever loved" is a line to keep in mind now, too. Maybe it could even be projected onto Sylvie this time, because Loki is indeed very dear to her) If there's someone out there who can empathise with Sylvie the most, it is Loki.

Why would Sylvie straight up cause another Universial War?

As I already said. Sylvie's arc is a negative character arc. It does not end well and causes a lot of chaos. Think about Peter Quill in Infinity War and his rage moment on Titan. They could have had the infinity gauntlet way before but Peter got emotional (understandable) and therefore destroyed the chance of an early good ending. The same happened with Sylvie. Her decision was mostly emotional, but also practical on the other hand (giving people free will and freedom). She will face the consequences and I'm pretty sure she's gonna redeem herself and tries to help fix the big mess she has caused.

Sylvie's breakdown

Another scene that was absolutely brilliant was the scene after Sylvie has killed Kang. She backs off slowly and then slumps to the ground, breathing heavily (now that I think about it, I think she even started to cry). She has waited for this moment her whole life, but now that it's done, it kinda feels like she didn't exactly get what she needed. Hunter B-15 has already mentioned it before that Sylvie needs to hunt the person behind the TVA down, unlike Renslayer, who only wants to find out who it really is. Although Sylvie might have recognized that this wasn't everything she needed at this point. We already got to know that she didn't have a clue what to do after she's done with the TVA. She didn't have a goal beyond that. And now that she has reached the point where she is clueless, she might have recognized what she really needed beyond finishing her goal: friends, a life, literally anything that doesn't make her feel alone. And she literally just kicked that one thing away from her. Loki, the one person who has been closest to her and gave her the feeling of not being alone anymore, the feeling of having a friend (or someone more than a friend), has been pushed away by herself. I think that in this exact moment where she sinks to the ground she recognizes that not trusting Loki was a mistake this time and that revenge isn't enough to satisfy her forever.

But maybe that one thing that will satisfy her for a long time is something she's returning back to in season 2. I am so excited to see her again and find out more about Sylvie's character!

Thank you so much for reading this! If you want to add something to this list or correct something or anything, feel free to do so. I'd love to hear your thoughts on Sylvie's character in the finale and what you think might happen with her in season 2 :) see y'all, stay safe and have a nice day/night!

[mariaiscrafting]

You know, what think I like when you are critical of a content creator is that you know how to separate a fact from especulation, unlike a blog out there that took especulation as facts.

Example, that night when we were critical of Karl, or any instance you have discussed about him, a lot of anons were saying that he gave them clout chaser vibes to them, and despite your opinion, you expressed that those were only especulation and not the truth, and to keep that in mind. That's good critical thinking.

But this blog had some similar anons, saying that he only is friends with the Feral Boys gro clout- In fact, they said the Feral Boys were only in it to benefit from clout and money. And they took it as a truth. I know you instance on them is neutral, but come one, they are friends. All of them. Karl isn't friends with them for clout. Like today Karl was playing golf with salad gang plus Sapnap and George at first and then Quackity and Dream joined bc they had spared time and it all devolved into typical chaos (Poor Corpse and Tina and Brook, had to endure those children lol/lh /j). Like, the stream wasn't planned with the 5/5 yet they joined, missing Karl and just having fun.

Idk, I guess that blog's superiority (They were a SBI focused blog) just irritated me. It's as if they were putting both groups at each other as if those streamers aren't friends or close. They were singing prayers of one while shunning the other based from especulation. Criticissism is fine, in fact recommended to be critical of your interests, but taking rumors as facts to base your crit is yikes. It's as if I wanted to crit SBI and base it only of "Philza hanging only with people younger than him is kinda weird ngl.." or "Sbi doesn't care about Tommy cuz he joined late" like that dumb Tumblr post did or some fuckers in Twitter imply.

The main reason I take so much care to separate speculation from evidence-backed theories and confirmed truths is because I feel like that separation is what distinguishes us from mcyttwt the most. One of the main reasons for mcyttwt's toxicity, imo - for its relentless cancelling of everyone, for its bandwagon campaigns - is that people oftentimes criticize and defend based on their personal feelings rather than rationale or evidence.

For example, I complain a lot about Dream stans on here, but you know the reason I didn't stop watching Dream directly after the cheating scandal broke loose, even though I thought he cheated? Because of mcytblr Dream stans. Mcytblr Dream stans engaged with me in discussion, both publicly and in DMs, about the cheating scandal, and even those who eventually came to the conclusion that Dream didn't cheat accepted the facts and statistics they were given and kept a healthy skepticism throughout the process. On Twitter, Dream stans were defending him before he even made a video following up to the mods' initial accusations because they felt that Dream wasn't the kind of guy to lie or cheat. They were replying to screenshots of statistical analyses from subreddits and to articles from mathematicians and staticians with extremely reactionary responses because of that feeling, which they believed in so adamantly, they had accepted it as fact. The thing is, to believe that Dream didn't cheat in the face of all the statistical and rhetorical evidence to the contrary is, in itself, speculative. Usually we think of speculation as a baseless theory that something is a positive truth- that is to say, that something did happen. But speculation also applies to those theories of someone not having done something, when the opposite has been nearly proven to be true.

For this same reason, I chose not to ignore the anti-technotwt threads with screenshots of Techno's old tweets in them. For me to have simply ignored these screenshots and continued supposing that Techno never expressed bigoted beliefs and/or currently doesn't would have been speculative on my part, and to boot, blatantly wrong, given the evidence to the contrary.

People in this fandom, and in all RPF/RPF-adjacent fandoms need to understand that almost everything they believe about the CCs they watch is speculative, at least to some extent, because of the nature of the content they make. Even if someone, in your opinion, displays evidence of some aspect of their personality - whether that be some form of bigoted, sweet, rude, clout-chasing, or anything else - because of the extremely one-sided nature of sharing one's life through a screen, that theory of ours will almost alwyas only ever be speculation, not a solid conclusion that can be drawn. We will never know these people's true intentions behind something shared to us via the Internet.

That vagueness leads to virtually every viewer creating a different theory in our heads about the CCs we watch, and we can't treat those theories as facts, especially not when sharing them with the rest of a fandom. I'm not a very big blog, but I consider even over 50 followers to be way too many people to spread a theory too, without at least clarifying that what I'm posting is speculation. If I have evidence, I like to list it or, if I can, provide sources; but otherwise, I take care to qualify most things with phrases or disclaimers that will clue followers into the speculative nature of whatever it is I'm saying. This is because theories and "feelings" can blaze through a fandom like wildfire, especially somewhere like Twitter, where so many things are word-of-mouth or based on summary due to character limitation.

You know why mcyttwt was cancelling Andi? Only a handful of original Tweeters under the cancel Andi hashtags actually knew what clips or tweets to criticize her for, or tried to elaborate on that criticism. But because every other mcyttwt user was getting bombarded by their mutuals hate-posting about Andi on their TLs, the "negative feeling" towards Andi grew and grew, even if most people didn't even know what they were supposed to feel negative about, exactly. Our judgement works on a quick trigger on the Internet because of the amount of information we're receiving, and so, even a single bad word against someone you don't have too strong of an opinion on can fundamentally alter your perception of them, usually subconsciously. If the first thing you see about Andi, who you've only seen on a couple LOH's or a couple Punz streams before then, is a tweet along the lines of, "disappointed in Andi for her homophobia and joking about suicide," despite you having no context, you will most likely be pushed to the negative side of her. Thus begins the cycle of hatred, building up and up, leading to you searching for more and more criticism about Andi, whether speculative or not, until you solidly and genuinely believe she is a Horrible Person. It all starts with the vaguest fucking feeling, because that's all speculation has to go off of, and it snowballs into a fucking wildfire across an entire fandom. I'm not about to be another person to let feelings snowball and spread like that.

Now, I don't know what exact blog you're referring to, but as an adamant SBI enthusiast, let me flip the argument many SBI stans have for their speculation upon the genuity of Karl's friendship with the Feral Bois, onto SBI. What do we have to go off of for the genuity of SBI's friendship, anyways? Our perceived brother dynamic between Tommy and Wilbur could very well just be Tommy capitalizing on Wilbur's brand and continuing the charade until now because it's been profitable. Maybe Techno only continues to associate with SBI because he knows how much his fanbase likes headcanon'ing about SBI, so he puts up with streams with them so he can continue to feed his fanbase with dynamics he knows they're obsessed with. Maybe Phil would rather play MC with people his age, and actually dislikes that he's friends with a teenager, but sticks around because he profitted so much off of Dream SMP and SBI-related content. And what could any SBI stan have to argue with me on any of these theories? Just because SBI laughs around each other and seems fond of each other doesn't mean they're actually like that behind the cameras. They so seldomly stream or make videos together anymore, anyways, so maybe they've grown tired of keeping up the dynamic.

Everything I said could be interpreted as utter bullshit, and that's because it fucking is. I don't actually know what Techno wants to do with his life, or how Wilbur and Tommy actually feel about each other, or who Phil wants to fucking befriend. The same goes for Feral Boys. There's nothing wrong with stating your theories or speculation, but to treat them as fact or not at least qualify such posts with the fact that this is all based on your bias and opinion, and no substantive evidence, is irresponsible. Just because you feel like one or more of the Feral Boys is "clout-chasing" doesn't mean you have the right to tout that feeling as truth. I feel a lot of things about a lot of CCs, both negative and positive, but no matter how strong my feelings, unless they have substantive evidence backing them up, I have no right to treat them as facts with my followers.