#anyway. we'll see maybe it'll get better. but good god. this is........something else

[heirloommtomatoes]

i think i’m gonna give birth control three months and then say byeee!! i miss myself! i miss myself so much! 

[slutshamethesquirrels]

Shamesy's Declassified Fanfic Writing Survival Guide - Part 3

Help! The world is burning and everything sucks!

hi hi friends!!! welcome back to the fanfic writing survival guide!

today i'm gonna cover a bit of a "no-no" topic, if you will. its something i've been struggling a lot with here recently and something i'm witnessing other authors go through as well: writer's block... or, at least, what you might think is writers block.

today, we'll be talking about what to do when you lose interest in your fic. and, respectively (possibly more importantly), what not to do.

1) Beat yourself up

Look, I know, I know. Theres a chance right now you're kicking yourself and loosing ur marbs because your little writer peanut brain has convinced you that you are satan's incarnate and everyone hates you and wants you to die.

this is, undeniably, untrue. i implore you to do whatever it takes to get out of this headspace before you do anything at all. go outside, touch some grass, maybe eat a bug, just really get in touch with the real breathing world with no fictional dick n balls for a while. however long it takes to realize your intrinsic value is not tied to the fictional dick n balls. there are no fictional dick n balls out there, friends. only real ones.

here u go, look at this:

feel better yet? if not, keep staring until you do. it'll get funny eventually, i swear.

2) Force yourself to write the damn thing anyway

this is only gonna result in a sub-par product, and your readers can tell. no, they can, i promise. it's always evident to me when an author has lost steam.

i dont want ur poo poo writing, and neither does anyone else. i would rather you abandon it entirely than ruin it-- AHT AHT! TAKE UR FINGERS OFF THE KEYBOARD RN!!! NO!!! BAD FIC AUTHOR!! BAD!!

3) Think you owe your readers anything

another controversial statement but what am i good for if not being a big ole bitch??

look, we love our readers. we ALL do but you simply cannot pour from an empty cup for them. you come first, your mental health and general health comes first. your interests come first and your wants and needs come first. if they want superhot!chad!alphamale!jimmy neutron x reader or whatever that fucking badly, they can write it themselves.

1) Write other things!

Yep yep!!! Write a one shot, a drabble, a personal self indulgent story, some poetry, whatever floats your boat!!

Remember, this is supposed to be fun! You are allowed to indulge in whatever you want to, shocker, I know!!! the world is your oyster baby! branch out to other fandoms, re-visit old dead writings you've re-gained interest in, write a character you don't usually write, jump on a roleplay forum and just chill, my dude. kick back and remember why you enjoyed it!

2) Put it on hiatus!

"NOOOOOO!" the readers shout and then immediately explode. "YEEEESSSSSS!" I respond just as violently. Seriously, push it away from your nog for a bit. Let it rest. I would rather see a good chapter from you in six months from now then to get something soulless. If you just cant rn, thats fine!!

3) Grab a buddy and have them critique you

god, i will forever be in debt to @vallification for having this type of friendship with me.

we often think of critique and feedback as a negative, but it can often breathe a new life into your work!! message your most down to earth and honest bud, send the draft over and just say "hey i fucking hate this why do i hate this" and chances are a pair of fresh eyes will be able to point out things to you you didn't see before. nut up and quit being a baby, we all have shit we can improve on. who are you, jesus christ? if yes, could you PLEASE answer my prayers and send me a hot n' spicy mcchicken to my door via drone and/or angelic delivery?? im not asking for much, dude its the best fast food sandwich.

"but shamesy, im super hermit basement dweller core and don't have a friend thats kind of a bitch that would--" yes the fart you do. im right fucking here, rude ass <3 my dm's and asks are always open.

3A) Bounce ideas off said homie

again, val could absolutely sit on my face for this. we throw ideas back and forth constantly. you have no idea how absolutely megamind brain your dogs can be until you ask them.

4) Just start virtually sharting onto a page

this is how suguru blue AND a first time for everything were created!!

just start typing and see what happens! sometimes it doesn't work out (#shamesy's failed ficlets ) but no matter the case it'll help you loosen up a little

5) Take your writing on the go!!

ooooo I LOVE THIS ONE!! Take your laptop or phone to the park, the beach, a coffee shop or cafe and just make it feel less like work and more like play! this can do WONDERS for your creativity! the library is also a great place, because you have so much literary inspiration to quickly reference!

hope this helps!! you can check out my masterlist to find the other two survival guides as well as all my writings! stay cooch!!!

[the-firebird69]

novae terrae

I like it it has meaning and it is important meaning. It's pertinent and it does a striking effect on me and my husband is in awe we're husband and wife and we are the big ones here.

north American Celestials

and we approve of course

Hera Zues

We like it too and we're gonna look at it and it goes along with what they think is a Canadian name It is really really a potent name though but still people take awhile to figure out stuff and we can't name it turtle that's ridiculous and we don't think it was named turtle they're they're kind of weird people. And this is the MR2 above it would be one of the cars used there could be three one of them might be the Volkswagen so we're going to think about it but that is from engine but it might fit in this particular car because it's not really that high up.

Olympus

No offense folks but the Volkswagen outnumbers all of you and it's sturdier and we can do it with the others if it doesn't work but I checked it it's like an inch higher than the Cena but we're going to lower the cockpit not the front portion and we're gonna actually the way it put it comes out front is fine and it would be the same that the wheelbase is about four inches shorter so a 103 inches versus 107 and we're gonna make it longer anyways but when you do that it'll be about the same way same length and you can make the same car 4 wheel drive is fine then first these start with 130 horsepower

vw bug stock 130hp top speed 185mph yes mph

vw bug o beetle really 0-60 4.5 seconds yes not so good

vw bug quarter mile 7.9 seconds and ok

.........................

CENA KIT CAR OURS ON VW BEETLE year 1997-2010

new top speed 425mph plus

new 0-60mph 3.9 seconds

quarter mile 6.9 seconds

Keep in mind that it has a full cage and is safe has an enclosure it is not massively heavy and Xena has a heavy car and he probably have metal panels and still go 600 miles an hour and that's the reason for a big motor and so you have to heft if you need it but this has speed and safety and you can get away even with half done a supercar doesn't really help that much if you hit a regular pickup truck it's all over. except for the cage I mean he might survive a few hits but same thing with this car he just bounced off and it might be safer.

Black God and Black Goddess

These are kind of secrets but nobody seems to get them incite someone talking and they don't know if it's true or not I realize I realize that and he's been saying it his clan is handing out information on the max got in trouble and people didn't really believe them and it was horrible someone told them to shut up and they said no he said I'm getting some of it and I I'm making something work and they were amazed too and who.

mac daddy

We also have a comment on this this is terrific and he wants to do the porch version too and we need the engineering on the John Cena and I just don't have time. I wanna do it I wanna do it badly and the two can help and really this is this would make a comeback for the Volkswagen and you have a version that people liked it's old and the front end doesn't look like a ball over the top and the rear end looks better and he's he knows what it is it's the Carmen Gear and yeah so you can make that for regular car for regular people 4 door two and a two door like they do everything else and he thinks that's great and it is so maybe you could design all three. And it needs to be stretched out a little and dropped down and the new features and he wants a list so I've got that. And I'll send it over and this is great it says we can do it start it in the Midwest and you can start your Porsche kit over there and yes we'll see who makes more of which any studs laughing that's a good idea but yeah I guess we'll have to design it but he wants you to do the Porsche 1 and he wants assistance with AVW and he's gonna have a Frank do it and he says he will and that's Frank Castle hard castle and Duke Nukem blockbuster says it was my car as well so he says who wants to do that. And Frank Castle a hard castle says it was his car And he's gonna do it good so I think for the VW and he agrees there's a lot of them and they still run but how many versus these cars. It says there's a lot more.

Thor Freya

iw as in the top

Frank Castle Hardcastle

There is a lot more to this no but I will tell you that the Volkswagen is prevalent but it doesn't have as many around as the MR2 but that doesn't have as many around as the Honda 660S which has mostly all of what we need to get it going there are other things to take into account rather than mid engine is the power level it's a very weak car the transmission in motor Not really sturdy but he says that you put it in there and you have on the literature an upgrade and we can sell the upgrade which would be a Honda in the Honda Trans axle or facsimile thereof and it's truly you can get the Honda Motor and the guy blows out his 880 or whatever and he buys the four cylinder so with that said I understand the concept. Smaller it's less expensive you can buy AS 660 for around$3000 it's kind of a dog it really is it is a complete dog it is a complete failure except in Asia and they still don't like it there it's ridiculous so we will go ahead with it and we're going to look at this because it seems to be a really good idea and I like it a lot I don't think that we could make a rear engine version work that well and the front engine is too high up in the air no it won't handle well enough if you do it with this 660S it's way too underpowered and the motor is expensive satan $8000 with the transmission. The Volkswagen they have only 200,000 trillion no it's like 200 trillion they're all kind of kind of gone so I'm going back to the damn Chevy Cruze and I'm more comfortable with 200 horsepower and I saw your face too 800CC it's like 40 cubic inches. That's ridiculous. You said a Harley Davidson Motor is still only 100 horsepower and they way too much but the transmission would hold out probably work but what a pain so we don't want to do that. He said he's gonna just keep gyrating until I pick it up and knock it out there it'll take only a few days with young engineers who want to have a part of it. I do feel bad and I see what you're saying we need them to take on the responsibility and shoulder it and have the cause and it is a great one this thing would be awesome I like the Chevy Cruze idea it's a regular car it doesn't do anything it's not like it could do something which a lot of these sporty ones could. It's like it will never do it just like the beetle. That was the point of the beetle being used with the Bradley GT1 and he told Dave and he said no way so it's the same concept the thing will never go faster than 130 and will never beat anybody in a race no matter what you put in it change the tires put a 350 in there and you're going up to 170. So I'm gonna get working on this and I'm glad we went through this there's other cars for those but really they're phased out so they're gonna have to think of something different probably something like Chevy Cruze in Germany and something like it elsewhere and he says no it's here so it would be these cars the American cars that don't do anything and there's a lot of them in different models look like different cars the Mercedes has a supercar it looks like a the Mercedes has a supercar it looks like a Chrysler the configuration is the same and I get that chrysler has a 400 horsepower car and there's a Mercedes super car that looks really hot and women would like it and that's a German car so he's interested and it's a better idea I'm gonna go ahead with this and start getting it going and your idea is good we think that Sina will actually buy them and eventually we use a different chassis that we would probably make and we can make it faster it's easier to do but we're not gonna do the work but you know sometimes it's easier to make a car than it is to make a kit but at this point you have to do that and we're gonna start out with it so he is interested and we're gonna proceed

Duke Nukem blockbuster

We're going to approve this

Olympus

God bless you all for hanging in there this was terrible . Right now there's a war right to the east the more locker out there with 40 households out of really 107 they didn't get trapped and they are ganging up on them no they're getting more and more people right now it's becoming a huge huge battle and we will have more updates momentarily.

Thor Freya

Moving that engine is difficult and he wanted to avoid it but boy you can't do it these days and we want it to be a mid engine but we're gonna offer there's an option. It won't be that hard for us and they'll think it's worth $1,000,000 we'll probably have to charge some money and to make it sell. But first he says it's not going to be an expensive kid that we get that.

Olympus

Now I don't see what you're saying it's not going to be Bradley gt but it won't be like a replica and replicas are pretty good so I am going to do it and I saw the Spartan interior and it's not his it was a different vehicle but that's the idea is to make it very cheaply and simply to get it out but not dumb looking it's going to look modern like a spaceship and I do know how to do that i'll put a couple things in there make it cool and the steering mechanism and gear shifter have to be and that's nice in the seats so that's something I understand and I do understand what you're saying we don't want to make it a $1,000,000 car we want people to be able to afford it in lots of them. And his guys don't have much money. Kinda kick things around like this and something to do rather than get in trouble. So we're gonna go ahead with this and I'm gonna start right now. Now I have the concepts it's gonna be down and dirty but it's gonna look awesome and work awesome and the insides they can do the they have all sorts of people who do that and at some point he said well launch a contest for the interior design and see which components go in and that's saying no way and we can do it that way and then we'll claim the design. They do buy it more afterwards by the way.'cause they knew who it was

'cause they knew who it was

Duke Nukem Blockbuster

It's kinda like the outside when you start it up but I do understand what you're saying it's really his design but here we go with that stuff right now.

john Cena He says I'll have to go out some ax where they got it

[bellylivesthepoguelife]

i need you. [part 2]

Note: I can’t say “THANK YOU” enough to @mbabystein​ for beta-ing this! I sent it when I was *thought* I was done, and she said, “hang on a sec.” After discussing, I added 1,000+ words to it, and it is SO much better than what I initially wrote! I can’t WAIT to hear what y’all think of this one! ;)

Also! I got this request a few days ago and it fit SO perfect that i HAD to use it for part2!

Request: Hey can I request "I just want you to hold me." with jarah b??!💗

Word Count: 2.8K

(Part 1)

It's an hour later when their tears stop, and a numb, tingling sensation creeps into their bones. They don't speak for the longest time, each unable to escape the funnel of thoughts ringing too loud in their heads. Sarah is the first to break the silence. Sitting up straighter from where she was slouched against John B's chest. She doesn't look at him as she speaks.

"How mad are you." It's not phrased like a question even though it is.

She feels him swallow and clear his throat. "I'm not mad, Sarah."

Her eyes almost roll, and she's thankful that they're not looking at each other. "What are you then?" Silence. "I know you're feeling something."

His head makes a soft thud as he rests it against the wall he's leaning against. She'd bet a good amount of money that his eyes are closed as well.

"So many things."

She tries to ignore the thumping of her heart, tries to even out the quickening of her breaths. "Please tell me." She whispers. "I need to know what you're thinking."

There's more silence as he forms his thoughts. "I'm scared." He confesses.

She wraps her arms around him, hoping she can make him feel some of the comfort he'd been providing her. "Me too."

"How are you feeling?" His hands run up and down her arms, his unconscious way of comforting her.

"I'm terrified." A kiss is pressed to her hair, and the tenderness of it catches her off guard. The tears come before she even realizes, and she sits up straight, wiping at her eyes. "And I want to stop crying!"

John B smooths her hair back a couple times. "It's okay, you can cry."

"I don't want to cry. I want to talk."

He pulls his knee up to rest his arm it so he can still play with Sarah's hair or rub her back. "So let's talk."

She's quiet for a long time, staring straight ahead. John B stays silent, allowing her the time to think and gather her thoughts but he's still the first to break the silence. "You know if you want to talk about things, you have to actually say the words you're thinking?" He smiles and plays with a piece of hair before tucking it behind her ear. "Don't shut me out, Val. Please. Let me into that pretty head of yours. Let me help you carry some of this." Sarah turns to look at the man sitting on the floor with her, the only thing he wants is to help her. "You can start from anywhere, and we'll work our way through it."

Nodding, she takes a breath and allows him into the hurricane of her thoughts "Okay, well obviously I'm going to get fat--bye-bye bikinis..." She rolls her eyes and John B has to focus on not letting a smile break out on his face; because of course that would be the first thing out of Sarah Cameron's mouth. "...and I'm going to get sick all the time, which is obviously no fun." John B echoes something that sounds like "definitely no fun" and the commentary makes her smile. "Then there's telling everyone, and--fuck--what is everyone going to think." She runs a hand through her hair. "Who even is everyone? I don't exactly have the best parental figures in the world. My dad and my brother are in prison. How am I going to be able to even look at Wheezie." John B nods. "We obviously have to tell JJ, Pope, and Kie, and they're just gonna give us even more shit for being irresponsible."

"I think they may surprise you."

"Really?" She deadpans. "You really think they're going to be excited about this and not give us any shit?"

He sits up straighter. "I don't know about any shit, especially knowing JJ, but he'll just give it to me. I think they'll be nicer than you think."

"They're gonna be weird about it I know it." John B doesn't comment, and she shakes her head to herself. "Can you get me a drink?"

"Of course." He knew better than to push. Especially given the current high-stress environment, he decides changing the topic might be a better route. "When did you find out?" He stands up to stretch before walking over to the mini fridge in the corner to grab a couple waters that he knew would be stashed inside.

She pulls her knees to her chest, and rests her chin on top. Her arms come to hold each other in the pyramid of space her legs make. "This morning."

"Before you called me?" He clarifies, walking back over and handing her a water before moving to sit on her bed.

She nods in agreement as she takes a sip of water, standing up and stretching before moving to sit next to him.

They sit side by side, against the wall that the dorm-standard twin bed was pushed up against, legs extended out, Sarah's head on his shoulder, while John B's arm rest across her thigh. Sarah rubbed his arm, giving him time to process.

"We should probably get you to a doctor," is the first thing to come out.

Her body tightens when she realizes what he might be insinuating. She tries to seem nonchalant, aloof, as she gauges him warily. "Why?"

"I mean, isn't that what you're supposed to do?"

"I guess..." The impulse to narrow her eyes at him is intense.

"Well, I'm assuming there's some medicine, or something that you have to take, right?" His eyebrows furrow together, and he looks at where his hand rubs circles into her thigh. "Or something to help you with getting sick all the time?"

Sarah looks up at him as he continues, but she's more comforted knowing that his only concern is her.

"There's tests you have to get too, right? Like--I don't know blood tests or something? I don't really know a lot about this." He looks down at the water bottle he's playing with in his right hand.

"Neither do I." She admits. Sarah Cameron knew how babies were made, obviously, and even had thought about having them with John B one day. One day that was years down the road, not when they were only 19. She didn't even know if John B even wanted kids. Sure, they had talked about it in passing but never with any serious intent. He and JJ were the free spirit, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants, don't-make-plans-more-than-a-year-in-advance kind of people. She wasn't expecting him to be excited by the news by any means. Hell, she's not even thrilled with the idea right now. But he's still here, with her. She knows he loves her. Has to keep reminding herself so the fears of "he's going to be so pissed" and "he's going to leave you" stay far away. Having him here helps reinforce it.

His breath hitches, and breaks her train of thought. "I mean, they have to make sure you're okay, right?" His words are coming a bit quicker now. "That you're okay. That you and- and..."

She meets his eyes, and sees nothing but fear and concern there. Her hand rubs against his on her leg. "You can say it, John B, it's okay."

His eyes close, and he clears his throat. "That you... and the baby... are okay." He whispers. His breath jerks again just before she sees the first tear slide down his cheek.

"John B." She has to wonder if this is how he felt this morning, when he was still unaware of the situation. Only knowing that she was hurting. She straddles his legs, gently pulling his shoulders from the wall and into her embrace. "It's okay. We're going to be okay."

"I know." It comes out sharper than he probably intends, but he's quick to cover it up. "Sorry." He pulls back, running a hand over his face. "Anyway, what else did you want to talk about."

"I want to talk about you."

He gives a humorless laugh. "We're not talking about me, Sarah."

"You're a part of this situation, too." She gives him a look that dares him to defy her. "So, yes, we're talking about you."

"I'm not the one going through this."

He's deflecting and she knows it. "Maybe not, but you're involved just as much as I am. This is half of you, too."

"Dammit, Sarah!" His outburst startles both of them. She sits back on her heels, legs still on either side of him. "I'm trying to help you! Trying to--be strong for you because I know how scared you are. I don't care about how I feel--I don't want to talk about me because I'm the one that put you in this situation in the first place! So just--just let me take care of you! Please!"

As painful as it is to watch him break, she knows that this is what he needs. Sarah immediately pulls him into her, again. This time his hands wrap around her back, squeezing lighter than usual. She holds his head to her and plays with the hair at the nape of his neck, taking on the supportive role, and allowing him to be the one to break down for once. "I'm so sorry."

She pulls back enough to place a kiss to the side of his head. "It's not your fault. Vlad, we're going to be okay, I promise. It'll be okay." She's not sure if she's trying to convince herself or him, and she doesn't know who needs to hear it more.

It's as if the tears shed stimulate the need to make the fear known because he's pulling away to put his hand on either side of her face. "Sarah," there are still tears falling, and Sarah thinks there's no way she deserves the man sitting in front of her. "You're already getting sick. You're probably only going to get worse! And you're here, and I'm in the OBX, and I don't know the first thing about any of this! I don't know how to take care of a baby! I know they're expensive, so how the hell am I going to be able to support one when I've never even held one! And now there's one inside of you, and..." the thought seems to remind him of something else, because all of a sudden he's frantic. "And you're going to have to go through labor to get it out--oh god. Oh god--"

"John B." He's going to have a panic attack if she doesn't interrupt his spiraling thought process. "John B, look at me." His hands have moved to his head. She's pulling at them, hoping that looking at her while she speaks will ground him.

"You didn't ask for this, Sarah!" He pulls his hands away, and the anguish in his eyes brings tears to her own.

"You didn't either!" The short laugh that leaves her throat is unexpected even to her. "Babe, I love you, but you are completely freaking out. You make it sound like I just told you I only have 6 months to live."

He doesn't respond, and she feels a tug in her chest.

"What do you need, JB." Her voice is soft as she brushes a thumb under his eye. "What can I do to help you?"

There's a ragged breath, another couple moments of no one speaking. "Can you... I just want you to hold me. Please." Sarah's arms are locked around him in an instant, and the confession brings both of them to tears. Just like earlier, they allow themselves to feel the push and pull of the emotions that come in waves.

"This isn't a death sentence." She breaks the silence thinking maybe he needs the clarification. He said he doesn't know anything, but she hopes he at least knows this much. "I'm pregnant. Not dying." She kisses his shoulder to reiterate. "Yeah, you live in the OBX, but I can take a break from classes--"

"I don't want you to have to do that." He interrupts.

"It wouldn't be forever." She concedes. "And if I didn't want to do that, I could always switch to online. Point is: there's ways around that." She runs her hands through his hair, giving him another grounding technique. "Babies are expensive, yeah, but we've got some of the gold money to hold us over, and that's more than enough to support us and a baby." There's a pause, and he nods, rubbing a hand across his face to wipe his cheeks. The tears have subsided for the most part now, and Sarah's hoping that her words are getting through to him. "And yes, I will have to go through labor. But that's way down the road, and we will be able to talk through all of this so we will know what to expect, and make plans so we're prepared."

His eyes slide closed, and he mentally prepares to be his most vulnerable. "Sarah, I can't lose you."

"And you won't." A kiss to his forehead brings a smile to his lips. "You're not."

His arms wrap around her torso again, holding her like his only lifeline. "I'm just--I guess I'm scared that you're going to be upset with how this is going to change everything... you'll blame me... resent me..."

Sarah presses her forehead to his. Looking in his eyes so he knows she's serious. "That's how I felt this morning. I thought you wouldn't want it... wouldn't want me. I mean it's not like this is something we planned on." He starts to explain himself, most likely in disbelief that she would think that of him, but she cuts him off. "But now you're here. Holding me... and we're talking... and now that I know you're not angry and resentful... I don't know. There's a part of me that might be a little excited." His face softens then, her confession easing the tension that had taken a permanent hold on his body. "Do you think that maybe... maybe at some point down the line you might be excited, too?"

He kisses her then, hard and long, like there's a time limit. "I can be excited." He breathes. "I just can't handle the thought of you suffering, or hurting."

She kisses him this time. "I'm pregnant." She repeats. "I'm not dying. There's going to be some hard things, sure, but there's going to be some really beautiful things, too." He smiles then, and she thinks they might be okay.

"Do you think..." He starts, but then thinks better of it.

"Do I think what?"

He shakes his head and looks a bit embarrassed. "No, it's dumb."

She smiles at the change in their conversation, wondering how they both aren't suffering from emotional whiplash. "No it's not. Please ask me. What do you want to know?"

John B plays with his signature bandana and takes a minute to gather his courage, though it comes at the price of making sure there is no chance of eye contact when he asks. "Do you think... that maybe... I might be able to see the test?"

Whatever it was that she thought her boyfriend was going to ask, it sure as hell wasn't that. She just stares at him while her brain takes a minute to process the request. "You..." When she realizes what he's asking, she immediately jumps up to retrieve the piece of plastic from her desk drawer. "yeah. yeah, of course." She scrambles back on the bed, and sits on the edge of where he now had his legs folded underneath him. She hands over the test, and watches warily.

His hands are on both sides of it as he studies the two lines that shifted their whole lives. "Wow." He breathes, glancing up to see her smiling back at him. "Wow."

"Yeah." She agrees. "It's kind of crazy, huh."

"Crazy..." It's as if he can't stop looking at it. "So there really is a baby inside of you."

She nods, though he can't see it because he's still staring at the test in his hands. "There is. A baby that is half of you and half of me." He looks embarrassed again, and she can't help but wonder what's going through his head. "Penny for your thoughts?"

"Can I..." He doesn't elaborate and doesn't look at her.

Here eyebrows furrow. "Can you what, John B?"

He doesn't answer, but moves to sit beside her, even though they're facing each other. His hand reaches out hesitantly, and her throat tightens with emotions that she refuses to let show. "Can I?"

She closes her eyes to stop the tears from falling, and nods silently. She can sense his presence close to her, and the feather-light pressure of his hand on the stomach forces a whimper to escape her throat. She feels his other hand brush the side of her face, and leans into the touch.

"I love you, Sarah Cameron." is the whisper that leaves his mouth before he presses it to hers.

[eryiss]

Ship: Freed x Laxus [Fraxus]

Rating: Teen

Alternate Links: Fanfiction, Archive of our Own

Request: Something based off the official Rockband Raijinshuu art.

Summary: Being a rockstar, Laxus had to endure far too many chat shows. Usually he would grin and bear it, let the pointlessness of it roll off his back, but not this time. He was alone, forced to keep his budding relationship with Freed secret, and done with it. Fucking done with it all! But he had a way to fix it, and all it would take was a little courage.

Notes: This was a request by @fuckyeahfraxus. Just a warning, it has a bit of homophobia near the end, but nothing too vicious. I hope you enjoy it.

The Life Of A Song

Fuck chat shows. Fuck their hosts. Fuck their producers. Fuck their directors. Fuck their too-hot lighting, their stupid uncomfortable sofas, their tiny changing room's, their cramped green rooms with too many camera, their always cheering audiences and their utter lack of anything interesting or unique. Fuck the whole damn thing.

But Laxus' opinions on the matter weren't important. What did matter was that he smiled, laughed, told anecdotes and sat in a way that showed off his thighs and crotch just enough so that his Twitter stans - what a shitty word - made him trend once it was over.

Still, fuck chat shows.

This particular show, Late With Jase, was one of the worst. The host was young, overly enthusiastic, and his name was Jason rather than Jase which pissed Laxus off more than it should. He'd somehow dragged an audience of Netflix only watchers back to mainstream, with a mix of meme crap that Laxus cringed at, and celebrity gossip that would make a tabloid envious. But the ratings were skyrocketing, celebrities who went there usually got a boost in sales of their latest projects, and Laxus' manager had insisted he take his turn.

It would have been fine, were he not alone. If Ever, Bix and Freed were with him, they could take the responsibility and he could fade into the background. They had been a band for years, and that was how they always dealt with interviews. But they weren't there, because according to their management, Laxus was the moneymaker and all they needed.

"So Laxus," Jason turned in his chair to look at him. "Let's talk about Thunderstruck. What a success that's been? You must be thrilled.”

"It's doing well, yeah," Laxus nodded. He wanted to cringe at his words.

"It's doing more than well. You can hardly escape it," Jason laughed, and the crowd laughed with him. Laxus chuckled, even though he didn't find it funny. "But this is the first song that you've written, isn't it? And it's one of the most popular you've had. Must feel good."

"Well, it wasn't just me," Laxus swallowed slightly. "Everything we make is collaborative. Freed worked with the lyrics a lot, and Ever composed it."

"They're your bass player and electric guitar player, right?"

"I wouldn't call them mine," Laxus mumbled slightly.

There was a beat of awkward silence, and Laxus relished it just a little. Jason recovered quickly, which was annoying, and flashed a happy smile. Laxus would have preferred the man to stew in the uncomfortable silence, it would be a fitting response to him being dismissive of the band's contributions, but perhaps it was a childish way to think of things.

"Well we'll be hearing the song live at the end of the show," Jason continued, and Laxus' eyebrow twitched. The rest of the band were in the damn building and yet were being treated like shit. "But let's talk a bit about how you came to write it. Heavy rock and love songs have a troubled history, and you managed to make a hit out of it."

"Just lucky I guess," He shrugged. "Got good people around me too."

"Don't be so modest," Jason dismissed. Laxus wasn't being modest; luck was the dominant factor in successful music and without the band, Laxus would be fucked. "So, take us back. Where did the idea start."

"Well, hard to pinpoint I guess," Laxus murmured. "But, I suppose it was at the end of our last tour."

——

Performing live was indescribable. It was an assault on all his senses, in the very best way.

Everything was exhilarating. The feeling of vibrations on the stage, the cheers, roars and singing from the crowd, the sweat running down his back, the roar of his voice cutting through his throat as he sang. It all flowed through him, removing any sense of doubt or self consciousness he might have. On stage, before a stadium of fans, he was Laxus Fucking Dreyar. King, God and Dragon. Nothing was better.

They were on their last song of the set, a roaring anthem that the crowd could sing along to. It was thrilling to hear a song he'd worked on sung by thousands. Freed's words were being screamed at them, with the passion and love of their fan base. It was indescribable.

"We are The Thunder God's Tribe," Laxus yelled into the microphone as the instrumental began. The crowd roared in response.

Freed, Ever and Bix held the crowd's attention, and Laxus looked over the gathered mass of thousands. They were all there for them, because they loved them and wanted to experience them in person. A loud roar of appreciation cut through the stadium as Bickslow finished a drum solo that always brought the house down. How he managed to do that night after night while never screwing it up was beyond Laxus, but it was incredible.

Laxus sang the final verse, putting his whole heart into the performance. It was the last show of the tour, the last time they'd sing in front of a crowd like this for two years. He loved songwriting, but this was the best part of his work. The crowd, the music, the experience.

God he would miss this. This high. This buzz.

The lights died around them as the song ended, plunging them into darkness as the crowd roared their appreciation. The four of them could still see their fans as they cheered and yelled, and they took a few moments to appreciate it. He would miss this.

As they were taken from the stage, the adrenaline didn't waver. Laxus could run a marathon, deadlift any weight, swim any ocean in those moments. It was pure euphoria.

Evergreen trailed off to her dressing room first, scraping her nails down her bodyguard's chest before dragging him in with her. They were no longer pretending they were simply platonic anymore; Bickslow walking in on them must have removed any hope they could keep their relationship a secret. Good for them; Ever worked hard and deserved a big man to fill her bed.

Bix's groupies appeared out of nowhere, two men and a woman. They clung to the drummers bare chest instantly, and he cackled as he was dragged away for a night of depravity and booze. Laxus grinned; the party boy really had hit his stride this year.

Glancing at Freed, he saw the man looking equally amused.

A shared moment of eye contact sent a pulse of heat through Laxus. They stared at one another for a moment, and Laxus found his eyes crawling over Freed's shirtless torso without shame before he could stop it. Hard muscle and flexing abs were fully shown, and the heat in Laxus' face settled down lower. The rush of the performance was still running through him and he knew he wasn't in his right mind, but dammit Freed looked fucking hot in that moment. Tousled, sweating, shirtless; who could fucking resist that?

Laxus had always known Freed was hot. They spent hours upon hours together, it couldn't be missed. But he'd never thought too hard about it. You didn't fuck your badnmates. You didn't fuck your male bandmate.

And if he weren't coursing with adrenaline and dunk off of the cheers, he might have stopped.

With a stride, he surged forward and wrapped a hand around the back of Freed's neck. He pulled the man against him, pressing their lips together in a passionate, needy, energetic kiss. Freed dragged him back, pushing himself against the wall and taking Laxus with him. Hands were roaming over his chest, and Laxus groaned as they slid lower.

"Wait," Laxus whispered, pulling apart. A string of spit hung between them, and Laxus felt a twisted form of delight at it.

"What?" Freed asked, and his husky voice ran down Laxus' spine.

"We better take it inside," Laxus murmured, and Freed grinned.

They snuck into the nearest changing room, locking the door behind them. It was only in the next morning, when Laxus' mind was focused on something other than mindless, unadulterated pleasure, that he began writing a song. That he felt the need to write in a way that he'd never felt before.

Because kissing Freed was music. A high unmatched by anything else, and one that Laxus would find himself addicted to.

——

"And how did it come about?" Jason probed. "You've never written before. Did you find your muse?"

He had. But Jason didn't get to know it. Not that their manager would let it happen.

"Well, you know how bands work. You tour, make an album, then tour with the album," Laxus shrugged, reaching for his glass of water. "Your mind goes into production mode, I guess. You see things a little different, put a little creative spin on the things happening around you. Something struck me and I started writing," He laughed, awkward. "Not that interesting, really."

Not the fake story he'd been told to say, anyway.

The audience didn't seem to care about how crap the anecdote actually was, and applauded his words for some reason. Jason forced out a laugh, as if his statement had been a self-deprecating joke rather than a simple fact. What he'd been told to say wasn't interesting.

"Well, maybe you weren't struck by some divine intervention, but whatever happened it certainly worked out well," Jason continued, and the small screen beside him showed the album cover. Laxus hated the cover, it was just him. Not the four of them. It should be the four of them, or none of them at all. "It shot to the top of the charts and seems like it'll be there for a long time. That must feel good."

"It's incredible," Laxus agreed, and it was.

"So talk us through the writing process," Jason promoted, grinning. "I can't imagine you hunched over a desk night after night?"

"Well, the first draft only took a couple hours, really," Laxus confessed, blushing a little. The lights would cover it, but it was still embarrassing. "But me and Freed spent a couple nights together, and it became what you've been hearing."

——

"You always this tried?" Laxus chuckled, placing a takeout cup of coffee beside Freed.

The bassist blinked slowly up at Laxus, removing his face from its resting place against his arm. He glanced towards the coffee he'd been given with a thankful smile. Laxus smiled a little as Freed sat up straight, running a hand through his loose hair and letting it flow over his shoulders. He had bags under his eyes and a yawn split open his lips.

Laxus found himself slightly transfixed by the sight of Freed picking up the coffee, bringing it to his lips and drinking it in large gulps. His throat bobbed, pale skin stretching and chords tightening.

"Better to be tired that not focused," Freed smirked a little as he placed his coffee down.

"I think me looking at you is exactly the kinds focus we need," He grinned, and Freed chuckled.

The two of them were writing alone. After a fair amount of hesitation, Laxus had shown Freed the draft lyrics he'd written, and Freed had instantly presented ideas on how to fine tune it. He hadn't been patronising - nor had he teased Laxus about the fact he'd written a damn love song about him - and instead decided to encourage and help him make it a hit. They'd spent three subsequent nights in their studio, completely alone, and Laxus was loving it.

He'd never written a song before. Words weren't his forte, at least not the writing of them, and he much preferred to show passion through performance. But hours of Freed and him in the studio, bouncing ideas off each other, was thrilling.

Laxus suspected any time alone with Freed would be thrilling now.

Walking behind Freed to get to his own seat, Laxus leant down and pressed a soft kiss atop his head. Freed made a small sound and leant back against his chair to get closer to Laxus. He chuckled, ruffling Freed's hair slightly as he sat beside him.

"You made any progress?" Laxus asked, stretching slightly. He didn't miss Freed's eyes roaming over his chest. "What were you saying about being distracted."

"Until you wear looser fitting clothes, you don't get to talk about me being distracted," Freed smirked.

"Maybe I'd agree to that if I didn't know how uncomfortable those jeans you're wearing are," Laxus smirked. "Flatters the ass but crushes the balls, right? Regretting it yet?"

Freed didn't answer, but blushed a little and Laxus cackled.

They quickly fell into step, working on the song again. They were focusing on the second verse, which Laxus had dubbed the catalyst chapter. It had initially been a torrent of ways to describe how explosive his kiss with Freed had been - though names were vague enough for nobody to know that. With Freed's help, it had turned into a well written lyrical explanation to the first flushes of a romance. The burning passion, the fire between the two people, the erotic rush that could ignite from a simple glance. Watching Freed write, Laxus had to hope he was writing about his own feelings for Laxus.

He also had to stop himself from jumping the man, because Freed knew how to write a hot song. A really hot song…

Taking his espresso and gulping it down, Laxus looked away from his lover. Perhaps if Freed were anyone else - if he weren't a guy, or if he weren't in the band - Laxus might have given in and kissed him. He wanted to, but couldn't,

Once they'd been signed, te band had been given a long speech about how you couldn't screw your bandmate by their manager, how it could ruin things and screw up the dynamic. When Laxus had discovered he was bi, and wanted to come out as such, multiple crisis meetings were held. Not only had Laxus not been allowed to speak about his sexuality, with the risk of his contract being terminated immediate held over him, but he'd also been forced to stage pictures with a woman so he looked to be dating.

There had been backlash even then. His fans were vicious to the poor model, many seemed angry at him for supposedly betraying them by dating someone, it was fucking insane, and Laxus hadn't known hot to take it, but it had scared him off relationships for years.

So, he couldn't date. Definitely couldn't date bandmates. Certainly couldn't date men.

And knowing that, he'd still come back to Freed. Slept with him after their tour, then in the hotel later that night, they'd even fumbled about in the tour bus to the airport when everyone else was sleeping. They'd been in dates - or as close to dates two famous men could get - and a week prior had sat down and talked. They didn't care about the rules, because their budding romance was too damn good.

Never let it be said Laxus kept things comfortable for himself.

"Stop that," Freed scolded.

"Stop what?" Laxus asked, looking from the song and towards Freed.

"Torturing yourself," Freed explained, taking Laxus' hand and stroking it. "It'll do you know good. Certainly not when we're trying trying to write a ballad about the two of us."

"Sorry," Laxus hunched.

"Don't be, I think about it too," Freed admitted, leaning towards Laxus and against him. "But drowning in what ifs and self doubt is hardly going to make things better. We might as well enjoy what we have while it's still between the two of us, and deal with the fallout should it present itself.”

"You're right," Laxus nodded, blinking himself back into focus. "Not sure I can write tonight, though. Not in the mood."

"You don't want to write sonnets about how much you want me? Should I be offended?" Freed smirked, and Laxus laughed. "Or perhaps should I see it as a challenge to refocus your attention."

A hand ran down Laxus' inner thigh, and his breath hitched slightly. "Really?"

"Well, the song needs to be finished eventually," Freed hummed a little. "The sooner the better, I'd say. So getting your mind back on me seems the only thing that makes sense,"

"Really," Laxus tried to make his voice sound seductive, but Freed's wandering hand made him crack slightly. "H-how d'you think you'd do that."

"Well, let's say that in five minutes you find yourself in the instrument store down the hall," Freed mused aloud. "And let's say you find me already there, and I happen to be kneeling there waiting for you. Well, we can hardly be blamed if we find ourselves distracted."

Laxus swallowed. "Here? You sure?”

"There's no one around," Freed shrugged far too nonchalantly, and then grinned a devilishly handsome grin. "And I must admit, making you come undone in here has been a fantasy of mine," His hand squeezed Laxus thigh, before he stood up, and all flirtation was gone. "I should find a guitar, we can hardly write without practice. Perhaps I'll see you in there."

And then he was gone, walking away with his ass hugged perfectly in his jeans. All doubts about his future with Freed disappeared, replaced by the uncomfortable tightness in his boxers.

He found himself grinning, and a few minutes later he found himself in the instrument room, panting and moaning.

——

"It was pretty normal," Laxus continued, not looking to Jason. "We wrote, we practiced, we rewrote."

"Keeping your secrets close to your chest, I see," Jason laughed. "Now, speaking of secrets, the rumours have been flying on Twitter about who this is written about."

"I hadn't heard about that," Laxus tried to dismiss the statement.

"I'm sure you haven't," Jason nodded almost patronisingly, clearly not believing him. It was fair, Laxus supposed. #WhoIsThunderstruck did trend for a week. "But you have to admit, a virgin songwriter making something so powerful on their first try, and in a song so distant from anything else you've ever made, does seem to suggest maybe you've found someone to inspire you."

"I'm around a lot of talented people," Laxus shrugged. "They know how to make a hit."

He was squirming now, and not because of Jason. Their manager was seating in the front row of the live audience, and a quick glance his way showed Laxus a glare. This was a topic he had to avoid, because his fans needed to think the song was about them. It was patronising, Laxus thought, but they'd found success with their manager for a reason.

"So," Jason continued. "Have you found yourself a special lady?"

And then something ridiculous happened. Laxus found himself furious.

Such a simple statement, so innocuous and normal for Laxus' life, had opened the floodgates for Laxus. Because why had he assumed it would be a woman? Why had he assumed he could ask a question like that? Why was Laxus in a position where he couldn't answer something so simple when he really fucking wanted to?

Every ridiculous injustice seemed to swarm over him at once. How was it fair he had to parade himself on shows like this, on his own despite how his band deserved as much love and respect as he did? How was it fair that he'd known he wanted to be with a man for five years, and he'd never allowed himself to indulge before Freed? How was it fair that he'd been forced to endure meeting after meeting about how 'stupid' he was being for hooking up with Freed? How was it fair that he couldn't go out for a fucking pizza with his boyfriend without starting a ridiculous internet scandal? It was all so bullshit.

"Nah," Laxus answered, leaning back in his chair. The anger gave way to confidence; every interview he'd been on edge, but not any more. "Not a girl."

"So nobody's tamed the dragon slayer then?"

"Not a girl," Laxus repeated. "A guy. I'm bi, and for the last couple months I've been dating Freed," There was silence, and Laxus grinned and turned to Jason. "Bet you wished you'd gotten him on stage with me now, huh?"

"You're…" Jason seemed at a loss for words.

"Screwing the bassist, yeah," Laxus laughed, exhilaration flooding through him. "Inevitable really. I've known I liked guys for five years, and there's a load of fan pages who talk about how hot Freed is, so it was bound to happen," He grinned, running a hand through his hair.

This felt so good. Fuck, he didn't know how much he needed to do this.

"So," Jason tried to recover. "Well, erm, we have r to go to break now. Maybe we'll talk about that when we get back, I really don't know."

The moment the cameras cut, people began approaching Laxus. His manager, his PR team, and most importantly, his band. Ever and Bix attempted to run interference on their management team, but the angry man and his cronies pushed through them with fury on their faces. Still, Freed met him first, and wordlessly grabbed Laxus by the collar and brought their lips together. It was more passionate and desperate than any of their kisses had been.

"I'm so proud of you," Freed whispered. "And we are definitely talking about how you know those fan sites exist."

"Who d'you think made 'em," Laxus grinned, and Freed laughed.

Their small, shared moment ended when a throaty cough cut through them. Their manager was looming over them, and Laxus met them with a cruel grin, knowing it was too late: that was the problem with live TV.

"Problem?" He asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"What the hell were you thinking?" The manager snarled. "You just fucked all of us, do you understand that? How fucking selfish are you. You've ruined this album, you know that? You think your bandmates will forgive you?"

"Nothing to forgive," Bix said immediately.

"You're a dick for not letting him do it before," Evergreen agreed.

Their manager seemed to flounder for a moment, before narrowing his glare at Laxus again. "Do you think your fans will want to see that?" He growled again, voice getting louder now. "You think they'll still want you now they know that. Now they have to think about you being with… with him!" He motioned to Freed disparagingly. "They'll leave you. You've fucked yourselves, you know that."

Silence filled the soundstage, and their manager seethed. Laxus grinned, then looked past him towards the audience, half of whom had their phones pointed towards them.

"Since you're always talking about PR," Laxus smirked. "How d'you think you'll look once this hits Twitter?"

Their manager halted, then slowly turned. He turned sheet white, and it was brilliant.

"Oh, and in case you're worrying about your little threat to drop us if I came out, don't," Laxus smirked, though looked up to his band, who all nodded. "Yer fired, so fuck off."

[lunastargazesstuff]

From white to red🥀

Hawks(Keigo) x reader

Y/n= your name, Y/H/N= your hero name, Y/Q= your quirk

Character is aged up (18+)

(I know how old he is, I say 18+ just in case)

Warnings: swearing, Angst, blood and mentions of death

It was Monday, god you hated Monday, the only thing that made the day better was Keigo, yesterday he said the agency didn't need him or you today, so he could be on call with you.

As you woke up, all you could see was red,(no, it's not blood! We'll get there) slowly your eyes adjusted to the morning light as you smiled, gazing at the beautiful red feathers. You rolled over, immediately seeing Keigo snuggled against you, you smiled even wider, you couldn't resist the temptation, so you kissed his nose. Consequently waking him up, not that he cared though, seeing your beautiful face always made him happy

"Morn'in dove" he said smiling sleepily at you

You giggled as you apologized for waking him up and kissed his cheeks as a "sorry" of sorts. He chuckled softly, pulling you closer as he murmured "That was the best way to wake up, baby bird". You hugged him closer as he peppered your face with kisses, smiling happily, you gave him an eskimo kiss(softly rubbed your nose against his)

Suddenly, his stomach growled, startling you both, "Heh, we got anything good for breakfast, dove?" He asked sheepishly. Chuckling, you got up and got dressed, heading to the kitchen, waving your hand as you opened the bedroom door saying "Alright, I'll make something for the hungry birdie"

He playfully rolled his eyes and chuckled as he watched you leave, deciding a feather could help you with breakfast, he mischievously sent one your way

The feather flew right towards you

You yelped as the feather tickled your neck, then giggling softly, you reached your hand out and pet the feather, softly stroking it as you watched it fluff up

As you did so, Keigo stopped moving, frozen at the sensation, till he yelled, "Hey! You know my feathers are sensitive, stop teasing!"

Laughing, you stopped touching the feather as it zoomed back to Keigo, and started making breakfast, happily humming

You were done making breakfast, just putting the food on some plates, when Keigo came up behind you, "Boo!" He yelled playfully grabbing your shoulders."Gah!" You yelped, as he nuzzled your neck

"Keigo~, I could've dropped the food!" You whined, leaning back against him. He just chuckled in response and made his feathers grab the plates, "There you go, dove! Now there's no way you can drop them!"

Rolling your eyes, you sat down at the table as a feather delivered your food. You and Keigo were almost done eating when suddenly, his phone rang

His expression turned grim and serious as he immediately answered the call, then he ended the call and turned to you

"Sorry dove, the agency just called, there's a situation downtown, and they want us both at the scene immediately"

Sighing you nodded as you and Keigo went to grab your hero outfits

"What type of quirk does the villain have?" You asked curiously

"Actually, I don't know... the agency said we were the best fit, they never mentioned what quirk the villain had" he muttered, as you became concerned. "M-maybe we should call them back and see if anyone else might be a better fit?" You wondered out loud

"Naw, we can beat any villain, baby bird!"

If only he knew how wrong he was...

At the scene:

It took about 30 minutes to reach the site, flying high above the city as Keigo carried you bridle style, happily spinning in the sky as you giggled softly. "Come on Keigo! We need to focus-"

Suddenly, he stopped, staying in place as he stared ahead in horror. "What is it?" You asked looking over your shoulder, soon gasping as smoke and the smell of blood clouded your senses

'God what's happening, just..what quirk does this villain have?' You thought in horror as you and Keigo landed, scanning the area, Keigo sent out some of his feathers to search for survivors

You and Keigo only found a couple of survivors, they were wounded, as you used Y/Q to help them find shelter and stay safe, Keigo continued looking for survivors. You had only found a few more that were still alive, you were becoming increasingly alarmed, as you kept searching. When Keigo came back, he almost looked as grim as you, only having 4 people with him

One of the survivors Keigo brought back was a child, no more than 6 years old, crying and shaking in fear, you had to save them somehow. There were only a couple low ranked heroes nearby, you called for them, asking them to protect and look for more survivors

Suddenly the ground shook, a huge dome was enclosing the area, it looked like black tinted glass, ominous and evil

Your eyes widened as you got into a fighting stance, 'Fuck, this can't be happening' you thought, steadily growing anxious

"Y/H/N!" Keigo called out

As you turned around to face him, explosions went off in the distance. He quickly informed you that the villain had a quirk named "Black Crystal"

"I tried to break through the crystal already, nothing seems to be working, we're trapped..." Keigo muttered angrily

Your eyes teared up for a second before you quickly wiped them away, "W-we have to find the villain who's doing this" you exclaimed as confidently as you could

Keigo nodded, spreading his wings as he picked you up. While in the air you spotted a figure in the middle of the street, its arms were wide as it stared up at the dome. You quickly informed Keigo, as you both descended to the ground a couple of meters away the figure, you realized just how little you knew about the situation

'What is this person capable of? Who are they? Why are they doing this?' You thought worriedly as you and Keigo tried to make a plan

You and Keigo decided that he should try to distract the villain, since he was faster than you and could dodge if needed, as you would sneak up behind the villain and attack. As Keigo stepped out into the open, you couldn't help but fear for his safety, you couldn't live without him...you just couldn't

"What's up ugly? You make that weird domey thingy?" Keigo asked, successfully getting the villains attention

As planned, while Keigo distracted the villain, you started to make your way behind the villain. You were almost there, just a couple more feet! When suddenly, the villain spoke

"What do ya think you're doing girlie? Sneaking up on me?" The villain spoke eerily whilst chuckled creepily

You froze, 'what do I do now? Should I attack anyway?'

As you were about to respond, whether it be fighting or talking, Keigo beat you to it, sprinting forward as he used one of his feathers as a sword

Deciding it was now or never, you started attacking too, using Y/Q you and Keigo worked in sync. The villain seemed to be able to make objects out of black crystal, since the villain made weapons to fight you and Keigo with. It seemed like you were finally weakening the villain, 'just a little more and we'll have won!' You thought, feeling relieved

Wishful thinking I suppose...

Suddenly the villain allowed Keigo to punch him as he focused on you, kicking you straight to the ground, sputtering, you slowly got back up, only to realize you were to late, the rythm that you and Keigo were using was broken, the villain landed a hit on Keigo, before focusing back on you

Using Y/Q you attacked on your own, only landing a few hits before the villain grabbed you by the collar of your hero suit

Your eyes widened as the villain made a jagged crystal tentacle and pointed it right at your chest

Smirking, the villain slowly traced your neck with the sharp end of the tentacle, leaving a small cut as a tear trickled down your cheek. Then, still holding you, the villain turned around to face Keigo. Seeing you in such a position, Keigo could barely take it, he had to save you, but how?

Keigo stepped forward

"Ah, ah ,ah, don't come any closer, or she won't make it out alive" the villain cooed evily

Keigo froze, 'Fuck, what do I do?' He thought anxiously as you sniffled and bit back a sob

"It'll be okay Y/n, you'll be okay, I'll save you, I promise" Keigo said softly, you slowly nodded

"Now, be a good bird and send your feathers far away, hm? We wouldn't want you using them on me right?" The villain said, continuing to smirk confidently

You eyes widened as you fought against the villains grip, eyes watering, but to no avail. The villain pointed the tentacle straight at your chest before looking back at Keigo

Little did the villain know, while he was looking away Keigo had sent a couple feathers behind him

"Now, where were we-" the villain started, only to be cut off by a feather pressing against his back, the villains eyes widened before he chuckled darkly

"Okay then dumb bird, we'll play that way" the villain muttered

It all happened so fast, the feather killed the villain, but not quick enough

You gasped as the tentacle impaled your stomach, your scream being cut off from the pain as you fell to the ground

"NO!" Keigo screamed

Keigo rushed to your side as he cradled you on his lap

"No no no, this wasn't supposed to happen" Keigo cried, his tears hitting your face as you stared up at him, eyes wide in shock as tears ran down your face

"You'll make it okay dove? Okay? Everything's gonna be fine, you'll get through this, when you get better we'll cuddle and I'll buy everything you want..." he whispered, putting a hand over your wound, attempting to stop the bleeding. His eyes watering even more as he felt your blood coat his hand

You winced as you cupped his cheek, shaking your head at him, sadly smiling

"Kei-"

"No, listen to me Y/n, you're gonna make it. I'm going to be able to wake up next to you every morning, kiss you everyday. You'll be able to tease me whenever you want, just stay with me..."

Your head felt heavy as his words started to fade out

"You can't leave me, dove, I need you. You make my life worth living, I want to spend the rest of my life with you! I love you baby bird, I can't lose you, please, please don't leave me..."

"I'm sorry" you mumbled eyes starting to close

His eyes widened, he couldn't fly you to the hospital, the wound was to deep. He had to do something! He couldn't just stand by and watch you die

"I love you Keigo, my pretty birdie..." you whispered softly, while smiling

'God, how can you smile at a time like this? Don't show me that beautiful smile I fell in love with, my heart can't take it...' Keigo thought sadly

Your eyes closed, they felt to heavy to keep open

"No, no!" He was losing you, "This is all my fault, I should've been able to protect you, keep my promise and save you" he spoke, vioce breaking as he lost control of his emotions

"No....don't....love......please....Y/n."

What was he saying? You can barely hear him...

Keigo cried while holding you close, head resting against yours as his wings lost their shine

"Don't go..." he whispered

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Sorry for any mistakes, I'm pretty sure this sucked, I'm more experienced with fluff, but I tried!

The picture isn't mine, credit to the artist

[papergirllife]

To Draw A Bigger Picture

Chasing The Flames Chapter 9

When the movie finished, Jaemin was going to ask your opinion on the movie, when he noticed you had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

Just as Chenle was about to scream about something yet again, Jeno shut him up, muffling his loud voice.

" Y/N's asleep. Be quite. "

"Do you think we should wake her up? "

" It's already 11 plus. I don't think it'll be safe for her to go back home alone now, just let her sleep. " Renjun said.

Jaemin picks up Y/N, bridal style, and carries her into his and Jeno's room.

" We'll share. I'll let her sleep in my bed. " Jaemin said to Jeno.

Jeno separated their beds that were previously placed together, as Jaemin lays Y/N gently down the warm sheets.

I woke up on a warm bed with a fluffy blanket draped over me. I was clueless at where I was at, until I remembered falling asleep during the movie.

I rolled over to the other side to see Jaemin awake on his phone.

" Jaemin? "

" Y/N? You're awake? Do I need to get you anything? Water maybe? Do you want a change of more comfortable clothing? "

" Yeah, sorry. I'm so clumsy, I shouldn't have fell asleep, now I'm a burden to you. "

" It's fine, Y/N. You're not a burden, it's nice that you're sleeping over. We haven't had guests before. "

Jaemin said as he was looking for some clothes in the wardrobe.

Jaemin passes me a pair of sweats and a sweater and tells me to change in the bathroom.

When I put on the sweater I realised it was a Balenciaga sweater.

I walked out of the bathroom to see Jaemin holding up a cup of water for me, I gratefully took it and took a large sip.

" Jaemin, this is too expensive for normal people like me to wear. You should've given me something else. "

Jaemin looks at me with a comforting smile on his face.

" It's okay, Y/N. I rarely wear this anymore. It looks better on you anyways. Keep it. "

" But... "

" Uh, uh, no buts. Head to bed, or you'll be tired tomorrow. "

I climbed back into bed, secretly thankful for the good material of the clothing for keeping me warm in this chilly night.

" Jaemin? "

" Hmm? "

" Talk me to sleep. "

" What do you want to know about? "

" How did you get together with Jeno? "

The both of you were whispering, in fear of waking up Jeno who was sleeping on Jaemin's side, but I couldn't hear everything he said, so Jaemin pulled my bed closer to his.

" It wasn't a spur in the moment thing, it was more of a gradual built up of feelings, since we've known each other for a long time. We didn't really consider dating girls because of the risk, we're both bisexual. Us getting together was something that was fated to happen I guess, haha. Even though we didn't have any other choices, we never took it as a last resort. It's a blessing if you ask me, finding a sweet guy like him. He might seem aloof or shy sometimes, but he's a hopeless romantic deep inside. "

" You guys look really good together. "

" Really? Thank you. We should get some sleep. Goodnight, Y/N. "

" Goodnight. "

" You guys talked and you didn't wake me up? " Jeno shook his head in disbelief.

Jeno woke up to a scene that made him felt left out.

Y/N was cuddled into Jaemin's side, apparently the small little gap didn't do much difference.

" We should wake her up. "

Jaemin shook his head, disagreeing.

" If we do that, she'll feel embarrassed. Why don't you lie down next to me? Wait for her to wake up and act like this didn't happen. "

" She'd want that? "

" She's still confused about her feelings I think, it's best we don't push her like that, she might shy away if she wakes up to us needing to explain. She'll feel guilty. "

Jeno was grateful for Jaemin's skillful way of reading people's emotions, and laid back down the bed, an arm slinging over Jaemin's waist.

" I'd like to wake up to this again. "

" Me too, Jeno. We'll just have to wait and treat her better. "

When I woke up, I could smell a nice cotton scent, in my sleepy state, I nuzzled my nose to the source of the scent, but instead of a blanket or pillow, my nose hit something hard.

' Wait. Where am I again? '

' Dream's dorms, right. I'm sleeping on the couch? No, I remember Jaemin moved me to the bed. Wait, that's it. Jaemin's sleeping beside me. Oh shit. '

I slowly opened my eyes to see Jaemin sleeping peacefully right next to me.

I gently untangled my arms from his embrace and backed further away from him.

When I was at a safe distance from Jaemin and Jeno, I quickly got off the bed into the connected bathroom to splash some water on my face to stop it from heating up.

After checking my appearance in the mirror, I padded out of the bathroom back into their room.

The both of them were awake now, looking at their phones.

" Sorry. Did I wake you guys up? "

" Nah, we just got hungry. We have a new toothbrush in the cupboard under the sink, use it. "

" Thank you. "

When you finished washing up, you walked to the kitchen to see Renjun cooking.

" What's for breakfast? "

" Egg sandwich. "

" This looks good. Smells good too. "

" Wait till you try it, Y/N. It's the best. "

" Yes, coming from our demanding food critic, Park Jisung. "

" I got the recipe from Birds of Prey. "

" Wow, no wonder it looks and smells so good. I love bacon. "

Suddenly I felt a hand placed on shoulder, I turned my head back to see Jeno smiling at me.

" Morning. "

" Morning, you look nice, with the glasses. "

" Really? I didn't like the way I looked with them. "

" Don't worry, your fans like them. "

" Why are you so sure? "

" According to your fan accounts. "

" You've been keeping tabs on me with fan accounts? "

' Shit. I can't let him know that I'm following his fan accounts. '

" N-no. I just so happened to have read that from somewhere. "

Jeno had a knowing smile on his face, but he didn't seem annoyed that you were low key fangirling over him.

" Just text or call me if you want to know what I'm up to. "

He then grabbed an egg sandwich and sat down on the dining table.

I could feel the tension between the both of us. Or was it my own imagination?

It's probably my own assumptions in my early morning hazy mind.

" Y/N, take one. Be careful, it might still be hot. "

" Thanks, Renjun. "

I took a bite into my sandwich, the bacon had just the right crunch and the eggs and cheese were as soft as clouds.

" It's perfect, Renjun. "

" Glad you like it. "

I moved to the dining table to finish up the sandwich. When I sat down, with my mouth full of sandwich, Jeno took a photo of me out of the blue.

" Jeno! I look like shit in the morning. Why did you take a photo of me? "

" You don't look like shit. You look adorable, with your cheeks full of food. "

" Oh god... Here's comes the first cursed photo of me within 2 months of knowing you guys. "

" You haven't even looked at Jaemin's. Let me show you. "

" Yah. Stop right there, Lee Jeno. Don't ruin my reputation of being the cutest in NCT Dream. "

Jaemin said as he sat down to have breakfast.

Jeno did a puking face at him and continued eating his breakfast.

Not long after, we sat down to play Jenga in the living room.

Donghyuck was cursing at the blocks when they fell in his hands while Jeno kept winning.

When it was around noon, you packed up and papered to leave.

" I'll leave the extra groceries here for the next time you cook, maybe I'll pop in soon. "

" You better, Y/N. Before Chenle and Jisung eat everything. "

" Yah, Renjun hyung! "

As I stepped out of their dorms, I heard footsteps following me out. I looked back to see Jeno and Jaemin smiling at me.

" We're walking you to the bus station. "

" It's fine, Jaemin. It's still early, I'll be safe. Plus I don't want fans to spot us and get the wrong idea. "

" Okay, but give us a call when you're home. "

Jaemin was about to reject my idea, but Jeno beat him to it.

" Will do. "

" Bye, Jeno, Jaemin. "

" Bye, Y/N. "

I walked to the bus station reluctantly, not wanting to leave them.

" So, do the both of you consider today a success? "

" Chenle ah, you're too young to ask these things. "

" But Jeno hyung, I'm 20. I'm an adult. "

" Lele ah, you'll always be a baby in our eyes. But Jeno I think it's fine to tell him anything that's PG13. "

" I'll buy you coffee afterwards, Jaemin hyung. "

" Okay, fine. To answer your question, yes. I think today was a success. "

" Do you think she likes you guys? I think she does. "

" How are you so sure, Chenle ah? "

" Just a gut feeling. Plus, she looks at you and Jaemin differently from how she looks at us. Focus on the eyes, hyung. "

" The way you said that would've made any girl running for the hills, Lele. "

The next day I went into the office, I was greeted by Mr Kang beckoning me into a meeting.

" What's this meeting for? "

" Dream's comeback. From the looks of it based on what the marketing team has been working on, it's going to be one of the best projects we're going to be working on this year. "

After the meeting, it has been concluded that Mr Kang and I are going to be a part of the photoshoot, the stages and the music video, it's going to be my first time working with video making, making me giddy inside.

I immediately went to Dream's recording room to tell them about the good news.

As I walked in, Jeno was in the studio, recording his lines. He looked really serious and professional, just like when he modelled for you.

Butterflies erupted in my stomach as I thought of that day in their dorms, the way the three of us were cooking just gave me so much domestic feels towards them.

I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard someone call my name.

" Hey,Renjun. How's the recording going? "

" It's great. The concept is cool and we're getting both singing and rapping parts in the album. "

" Wow, that's going to sound fresh. Chenle must be really happy about getting a chance to rap. "

" Yeah, he's nervous though, he's been practicing for a long time now. " Renjun said as he points towards a rarely quite Chenle sitting on the couch, practicing his lines.

" Oh, I won't disturb him then. How about Jaemin? "

" He went out to buy coffee, Jisung and Hyuck tagged along. "

" And this is his? "

" Second for the day. "

" That boy seriously has an unhealthy obsession. "

" For now there's three things he's obsessed with, coffee, sugar, and Jeno. "

" Not a balanced meal if you ask me. "

" He never listens. It's great of you to drop by. Who are you looking for? "

" Oh, right. I just got the news that I'm going to be involved in your comeback for both photoshoot and mv. "

" Really? That's great. "

" The pay is great too. I'll take you guys out for lunch after your first win. "

" I'll hold onto that. It's lunch time now. We're ordering take out, want some? "

" Sure. "

Suddenly the door burst open, and Jaemin comes storming in with open arms and one of the brightest smiles I had ever seen, enveloping me into a hug.

" Aww, Y/N came to visit us. We missed you lots. "

" I missed you guys too, but if you don't let me go I'm going to die from lack of oxygen, Nana. "

Jaemin let's you go and opted to put his head on your shoulder, sipping his coffee.

" What did I say about too much coffee, Jaem? "

" Last one for today, I promise. "

He suddenly shoots up from his spot and goes over to the plastic bag.

" This is for you, hot cocoa. But you're sharing half of it to Chenle. "

" But...

" No buts. I won't be able to sleep tonight if your lactose intolerant acts up. "

He says as he pours you your portion of the drink.

" How did you know I was here? "

" I texted him. "

" How was your day, Y/N? "

" I just finished a meeting with the marketplace department and they decided that Mr Kang and I are going to be heavily involved in your comeback. "

" Really? "

" Yup. "

" That's great. I hope we're doing field trips for photos again. "

The way Jaemin looked at me like he has stars in his eyes was a sight to behold, but that's normal, for his natural flirty behaviour, I pushed those feelings deep down. I can't fall for Jeno and Jaemin, that's wrong, they're together.

I drank my hot cocoa in silence, a small frown tugging at the corner of my lips.

" Take out's here. I'll go collect it. "

" Y/N? "

" Jeno. Was recording smooth? "

" Yeah. Better than what I had expected. "

" Lee Jeno always has high standards. He's been cooped up in there for too long. "

" I just wanted to try different styles. I'm really hungry though, is the food coming soon? "

" Yeah. Renjun just went out to collect it. "

" Don't be too hard on yourself, Jeno. You need rest too. "

" I will. Don't worry. "

Jeno reached a hand up to pat my head as he sits on the couch opposite from me, his eye smile evident.

I really hope I'm not blushing now, it'll be too embarrassing to show up in front of them ever again if I did.

When Renjun came back with the food, I quickly placed down the money for the food and made up an excuse about a non existing meeting that needs me there in 20 minutes.

I grabbed the lunch box and left all of them after bidding hasty goodbyes.

When I reached my desk in the office, I was relieved to have got myself out of this mess that I put myself into, slumping into the office chair with a squeak.

' When will I ever get over with my schoolgirl crush towards them? '

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Savannah

Jac: Are you warm enough? Jac: 🧣🤗🧤🤗🧥 Savannah: No but that's a total secret, okay? I can't cope with the others judging me for trying to look nice Jac: I'll never tell Jac: [subtly getting her a blanket or something though, obviously] Jac: no one can come for your look 😍 Savannah: [you know we're snuggling under this blanket together because shameless excuse to be close af] Savannah: oh I see, you're trying to warm me up by making me 😳 it's fine that can be our secret too Jac: [would be so 😳 forreal] Jac: you can blame the 🔥 Savannah: [putting her head on the bae's shoulder like we're not already close enough and doing a little happy sigh] Savannah: but your compliments deserve full credit, anything else would be unfair Jac: [patting her head under the guise of checking out the boujee hat] Jac: your outfit arguably deserves a higher class of event but I'm still glad you're here Savannah: [doing a hat swap because we do so love sharing clothes with the bae and it's amusing as well as a shameless excuse to check her out like hmm what do we think] Savannah: I'm glad I'm here too Jac: It would be weird if you weren't Jac: I'm as close to you as my siblings now Jac: in a different way, obviously but still Savannah: [swapping the hats back because the bae is serving a look and also then we have to fix her hair and make that a moment™ soz Amelia for this blatant flirting you are witnessing rn] Savannah: I feel so at home here, with you Jac: [when you think the bae is perfect so you can't even pretend to sort her hair, so you end up fussing with your own after her like ugh it's so unruly but we're 🥰 and seriously soz have a more or something] Jac: You are Jac: you're always welcome, even when we're celebrating weird non-holiday holidays Savannah: [just giving her all the compliments out loud because we see that fussy and also we don't care who hears us, again soz Amelia and snuggling again] Savannah: I'd make you the same offer in a heartbeat if I felt welcome at my house Jac: [snuggling her extra hard for a hot sec there] Jac: I know, baby Savannah: [likewise and just burying our face in the bae's shoulder fully because emotions and doing a little sad sigh this time] Jac: [doing something to make her happy, probably posting the picture of her for example] Savannah: [giving her all the compliments again because that is a good picture tbh gal you clearly have skills but then because I'm evil I'm gonna say your bf sees it and so you're texting him forever while he's with his friends doing whatever] Jac: [at least you have an excuse to get up, like your other guests lol] Savannah: [just gotta do something extra as she's getting up like take her hand and make her do a little spin or something cos you're a nerd and we know you care more about this than whatever your bf is saying] Jac: don't faint Savannah: catch me & it won't be an issue Jac: I don't need to tell you it's dangerous to play near or with 🔥 Savannah: [as close to a LOOK as we can get away with] Jac: 😈 Savannah: he wants to see me, like, right now Savannah: but I don't think he's offering a higher class of event Jac: 😏 and obviously, you have to make him sweat it out a bit Jac: right? Savannah: all night at least Jac: Poor Ty Savannah: Do you think I'm being too 😈? Jac: not enough, if anything Savannah: oh really, well I hate that Jac: I'm sure it'll do the job on Ty Jac: but I think you could do better Savannah: of course I could, especially if the alternative means disappointing you Savannah: I don't ever want to Jac: It's very unlikely that you could Savannah: It's impossible, I promise Jac: Don't worry, it wasn't a challenge Savannah: I'm not worried if it is, I'll rise to it for you Jac: 🌠🌠🌠 Jac: I am going to have to challenge my brother not to be that basic white boy who brings out an acoustic 'round the campfire, excuse me 🙄😅 Savannah: 😄 Savannah: as long as Isabelle doesn't decide to sing along, because it'll be a challenge for me to sit through that Jac: 😬 Jac: she ALWAYS gets the words wrong! Jac: I think she might be partially deaf Savannah: you would know Savannah: it's a shame she's HOPELESS at sign language Jac: honestly, she'd need to do some brain training first Jac: bless her Savannah: I'm still waiting for you to teach me, maybe I'll be worse than she is Jac: [gutted you can't say gay things 'cos most people here can understand but you can still come teach her] Savannah: [Amelia do be watching you and she definitely can] Savannah: [Jude would also just be chiming in telling Savannah what she's doing wrong like a blunt bitch so now we're mortified because we have to be good at everything] Jac: [just showing her how to tell Jude to fuck off or something like excuse you] Savannah: [literally never swears because she's that kind of trying to be classy so you've been spared gal but we're not forgetting that you made us look a fool] Jac: She literally couldn't tie her own shoes 'til like last year Jac: I wouldn't spend any energy on her Savannah: it's fine, I'd rather know my mistakes Jac: She knows it's as rude to listen in on a sign conversation as it is a normal one Jac: honestly, I don't know where her manners have gone half the time Savannah: I'll have to get better now so we can have a conversation worth listening in on Jac: I'll show you properly Jac: when we have some privacy Savannah: you can come home with me, we'll have plenty of privacy if we leave here late enough Jac: You're really gonna make him wait then Jac: 😘 Savannah: he'll be too drunk to be any use to me once his friends are done with him Savannah: & anyway, I want to be with you Jac: Good Jac: of course I'll come Savannah: I feel like I haven't even seen you since Ty & I reconciled, I've really missed you Jac: he had a lot he had to make up for Jac: so I've missed you more Savannah: [touching that necklace he gave us without realising we're doing it as we recall that horrible argument] Savannah: I'm all yours now Jac: Good Jac: because we're both going to need really long 🛀 to get the smoke smell out of our hair Savannah: ugh true! I'll wash yours if you wash mine Jac: 100% Jac: and would you ever trust a boy with your hair, no matter how sorry he is Savannah: No way! Savannah: plus he's too tall to fit in the 🛁 with me, even the huge one at my house Savannah: he'd just sulk the entire time Savannah: I'm so sorry I'm taller than the other girl you dated Jac: the basketball boys always go out with tiny girls Jac: it's like their thing Jac: so weird Savannah: right? 🙄 Savannah: it's a totally possessive thing, I'm glad you can't stand over me to feel powerful, excuse me Jac: honestly Jac: people always talk about short guy's complexes but tall lads think they're so superior just for having a few inches, okay we get what you're trying to put out and it ain't cute Savannah: exactly Savannah: & if picking me up & throwing me around is SUCH a turn on for you, work at it 💪🏾 I have to put in effort to look good too Jac: Not about it Savannah: Ty isn't either, he's the gentlest boy in the world Jac: Yeah he is Savannah: maybe too gentle sometimes, but I didn't say so Jac: I get it Jac: you don't have to think he's perfect just because you're going out with him Savannah: he definitely doesn't think I am Jac: he's got no complaints though Savannah: for now, I suppose Jac: he told me, you saw Jac: he thinks you're good, if not perfect Savannah: he doesn't want to lose me Jac: he's not stupid Savannah: ^^ he'll say anything, that's what boys do Jac: yeah Jac: how much they mean is a different story Savannah: my dad's never meant a single word he's said to us Jac: even if he meant it at the time Jac: he didn't stick to his word, and that's what counts Savannah: yes, it is Jac: Ty's dependable Savannah: I'm not though, I'm a wreck Jac: hey Jac: [looks at her and shakes her head like no] Jac: do you want to go inside for a bit? we can be getting more food and drinks or whatever Savannah: okay Jac: [casually run off hand in hand so you can go properly talk about this] Savannah: [soz not soz everyone] Jac: [also said your garden would not be that big so probably gonna need to go upstairs or down so everyone's not just 👀 lol] Savannah: [get in the basement for that parallel] Jac: [sounds creepy but yes lol, go forth for that privacy hens] Savannah: [yet again we're just telling the bae stuff that we haven't told anyone including our bf #bonding] Jac: [we know the fucking vibes, y'all gonna be ages and do not care remotely] Savannah: [gotta fix Savannah's makeup for her to because she'll have done a little cry so that's gay & intimate] Jac: [honestly how this kiss doesn't happen sooner hun] Savannah: [that's the scolding hot tea] Jac: [casual patience of a saint somehow] Savannah: [we both know you're scared to cross that line hens] Jac: [mhmm how you just don't though when the tension is this high and obvious but you know, sort yourselves out] Savannah: [for now though go back outside to find Amelia has left] Jac: how rude Savannah: Do you have any messages from her? Jac: she told them she was feeling sick Jac: but she's not said anything more than that in a message either Savannah: one of her migraines? Jac: probably Jac: smoke can be a trigger, I guess Jac: oh well, I'll message her in the group chat, make sure she's okay Savannah: I hope she got home okay Savannah: it was a bit rude of Is not to go with her & make sure Jac: ^^ I'm like, girl Jac: you've had THREE hot dogs Jac: you could've done without the last one to be a better friend but priorities, I suppose Savannah: ^^ she could've at least come & got us so we could do the right thing if she wasn't going to Jac: Seriously Jac: now I look lowkey bad like thanks 🙄 Savannah: No, it's my fault Savannah: I feel bad, poor Amelia Jac: Oh my God, no, it's so not your fault Savannah: it's okay, I know I'm beyond demanding Jac: You aren't Jac: She just has a headache Jac: you're actually going through it right now Jac: you deserve time to vent Savannah: 😔 Savannah: but I do understand if you're upset with me Jac: I'm not, at all Jac: just at Is a bit for not handling the whole situation properly Savannah: Would you like me to talk to her? Jac: That's fine, we don't need to get into their drama Jac: it's like, not a situation and not going to be one because Is either wants it to be or is literally too ditzy to check in on Amelia herself without being explicitly told Savannah: You're right Savannah: you deserve a good night even if it is a fake holiday Jac: I'm having a good night with you Savannah: Oh please, I can do better Savannah: I've been crying for most of it Savannah: [proves it by doing the most, throwing ourselves into all the activities and thus the bae as well] Savannah: [I like to imagine poor Isabelle trying to get involved & we're just subtly not having it] Jac: [montage time, honestly Is you would've been better to leave too, at least the fam is here so you aren't being totally ignored lol] Savannah: [soz that we're just falling in love here] Jac: [literally can't help it sorry they don't mean the harm they casually do] Savannah: now you're having a good night Jac: an even better one, yeah Savannah: I'll be your 🌠 Savannah: anything you want, all you have to do is whisper it to me & I'll make sure it comes true Jac: Tinkerbell's got nothing on you Savannah: your happiness is so important to me, with or without the 👏🏾 Jac: you know I'd do anything for you too Jac: I feel like I should do more Jac: be better Savannah: you do more for me than anyone else EVER has, if you did more you'd be putting your own mental health & wellbeing at risk for the sake of mine Savannah: I'm not trying to be a drain of you like Is, who literally needs her hand held through every little thing Jac: I know, you're just so good to me Jac: but you're good FOR me too Savannah: I'm not always this selfish, I swear Jac: you're literally the most selfless Jac: all you do is look after Sienna and you're the best friend to me and girlfriend to Ty Jac: it hurts my heart sometimes Jac: I just wanna take care of you and make your life so easy you can thrive and shine Savannah: You're going to make me cry again Savannah: [IRL 🥺 because the bae is so pure & genuinely takes such good care of us] Savannah: I'll survive this & you'll see what I'm actually like without all this drama surrounding me Savannah: I really will be the best friend to you forever Jac: [we're such emotional bitches atm and always tbh hennys] Jac: I know you will, you're already amazing Jac: you're going to be unstoppable Jac: and I'm gonna be right there with you Savannah: [it's the only emotion we can safely express rn because smooching is forbidden] Savannah: I'm totally fine with doing trust falls Savannah: you know I believe in you & our future together Jac: 🌍 sister connection Jac: [because we are all earth signs except Amelia soz gal] Savannah: ^^ yes! Savannah: [take your bae to dance because it's a party and that's the only excuse we need] Jac: [bye at how much of a moment that'd be] Savannah: [literally there's every chance it's the first time they have because her bf would always be there at parties and stuff so I'm deceased] Jac: [we know you'd have no qualms stealing her away but a party with loads of peers is different from how intimate this is, at best everyone has a few friends] Savannah: [exactly that, so glad you don't have to see this Amelia you really would have a headache] Jac: [yeah this would be 💔] Savannah: [thank god we've got Isabelle cockblocking rn because y'all are too in love tbh] Jac: [just joins in 'cos not in love with you and thus oblivious] Savannah: [they'd be so annoyed lol] Jac: [lmao oh isabelle] Savannah: [go get some drinks or something gals and whisper shade to each other about this poor third wheel because any excuse to keep that intimacy going] Jac: [it's a good thing you are lowkey oblivious or you'd be way more upset by it all too] Savannah: [god bless you Isabelle, so soz you get done so dirty] Jac: [in the end you live your best life, just not being friends with this squad lol] Savannah: [the best thing for you is getting new friends my love, but for now I like to imagine she's talking to them about some boy or other, remember those you massive gays] Jac: 😬 him Jac: seriously?!? Savannah: What is she thinking of? & more importantly, what part of her body is leading her in those thoughts Jac: 😷 I can't Jac: so many cold showers necessary for her and honestly just some 🧼 for him Savannah: He asked me out, knowing full well I'm not single or interested, it was horrific Jac: the definition of no shame Savannah: I didn't know what to do Jac: I bet you didn't Jac: the actual nerve Savannah: Not to sound like Amelia, but I genuinely have no understanding of what she approves of or thinks we'll approve of about most of the boys she talks about Jac: Availability? Jac: like, imagine that was all a boy had to say about you Savannah: that's so sad Jac: like if they weren't so gross themselves, I'd feel sorry for them Savannah: I've just decided, I'm going to find her a boyfriend we can all stand to be around, Ty'll know someone Savannah: it'll give you a much needed break from how clingy she is & my heart won't hurt anymore from hearing her talk like this about boys who aren't worthy Jac: Such a nice idea 👼🏾 Jac: does he know anyone that will deal with her though Jac: she's a lot Savannah: It may not be an overnight success but I'll work my 🔮✨ Jac: I believe in nothing harder than I believe in your magic Savannah: I'm your girl too, just like you told Ty, of course you have faith in me & because you do, I feel so capable of anything 🥰 Jac: It had to be said Jac: like we said, the possessive thing, not it Jac: you're you and you're so many things to so many people, and you're especially important to me Jac: if he wants you, he's gotta accept that Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: I love you & you're always going to be part of my life, I hope he is too, obviously but there's none of that uncertainty with you, you are & you will be Jac: Right, romantic relationships are arguably almost always the least secure, that's just realistic Jac: ask any girl who ditches ALL her friends and then gets dumped Savannah: oh god, I could NEVER Savannah: I need you Jac: The concession they must make in their lives, like, who do you talk to about the stuff he has no interest in, who gives you advice from a woman's perspective??? Jac: so toxic Savannah: He & I have very different styles of self care, I'm sorry I simply would not survive Jac: 🏋️ is part of the daily grind, NOT a way to unwind, sorry Ty Savannah: 😄 Savannah: Don't worry, I promise I won't wake you as early tomorrow for our workout Jac: I'm not, I nearly ALWAYS wake up before you Jac: but that's okay, you look adorable and very peaceful 😴😘 Savannah: well it takes me longer to fall asleep Savannah: you look even more adorable & peaceful then 👼🏻☁ Jac: okay, so we're even 😅 Savannah: the universe is keeping everything in balance for us Savannah: I love that Jac: I know, right? Jac: if we had a 👶🏾 or a job share we'd be KILLING it Savannah: 🥺 you're going to have the cutest babies ever! Jac: 🤞 the dad's DNA doesn't screw that up Savannah: No way, we'll find you someone perfect Jac: I have more hope for Uni Savannah: you don't trust my matchmaking skills? Jac: No, no Jac: just the boys you have to choose from here 😬😂 Savannah: 😄You're right, an LDR makes much more sense for you & I wouldn't have to share you as often Savannah: I'll find you a first year uni boy who goes to school with Ty's brother Jac: You think so? Savannah: definitely, he'll fit into your schedule without wanting to become your schedule Savannah: & you may actually be able to have & sustain a proper conversation, depending what he studies Jac: you really do have the best ideas Jac: Obviously down Savannah: [immediately starts sending her pics and profiles because we're extra] Savannah: Let me know who you like & I'll totally make it happen Jac: I'll look properly tonight at yours Jac: [like no, Isabelle, you may not have more than a peep so you're #curious] Savannah: there's no rush, whenever you're ready Jac: 😍😍 Savannah: [snuggling again with our IRL 😍 because we're in love bitch] Savannah: [Savannah is just that touchy feely hoe like soz gal she's gonna just be touching you ALL THE TIME] Jac: [at least you'd have to vaguely get used to it or literally die haha, we know the 😍 are and will be for you but we'll pretend to be into these lads so we can scheme it together] Savannah: [we've since the pics you had a touchy feely vibe with Amelia too, even if it was more like hugs and piggy backs lol you can do this] Jac: [mhmm, arguably you can't but you carry it on for a long time lol]

[the-firebird69]

There's a huge name for what they're doing and it's extortion and they didn't get very far but that's what they're doing and they keep trying to do it if it doesn't work we have to be there no matter what our friend is saying if you go against my orders you're going to be court-martialed and hung and shot and burned it's because what's going on is important to me it's important to those who still remember if you don't remember it and you're going against it it's important you'll be Court mushroom the court marshall and if you're ours I'm sick and tired of hearing I don't want to hear it anymore you're a piece of s*** now Michael too and people say it you don't understand what you're saying at all well then stop saying this stupid s*** and going to town like a little girl f****** and do something and go to the 21st ringaa

Mac daddy

I do hear what you're saying he's kind of sick of me he's tired of me at the stupid mental health thing we just sat there thinking it's covering ridiculous you have to get a move on so we don't have to defeat everyone we don't have to conquer the Earth we're not as night and shining armor and he's not a gay boy he wants his money that'll make it better by itself and we'll have to work and I'm saying that and it's true I'm going to see if I can't get out of here and he says it's rather easy you have them do it they're an HR but it probably won't he says usually it requires a lot of death and I'm extremely angry but that's probably what it is I'm angry because he doesn't like me and it sees idiots doing it but I'll tell you what to get him anything we have to kill tons of people and tons of our own ideas we're not paying attention to this fact we have to kill tons of our own too and that movie mad Max really brought it back it says it unless you're a f****** crazy idiot you won't get the job done and it's not really true so he's a failure that guy stand but really this is a dangerous job and everyone's applying pressure but he's saying is there's certain people stopping it can't be that hard of a problem you just go over and get the money out and we don't know who it is exactly and he does and I get this it's the Max and they have a plan and it's time and see huge pain in the ass he knows that we can do the job it'll be adequate it won't be like he's Eddie Murphy in trading places it'll be like he's Arthur and no I don't want to trade places with you as Arthur this is good but anyways I'm not really that bent out of shape but he hates the mental health place he wants it burn to the ground and he wants them all dead and I do see his point they're like little kids messing with you and they have a bunch and they just keep doing it and they're very stupid and everybody's missing it it's like another group of trump it says maybe it is a group of trump and the more the time was f****** freaking God damn you so Island the more they don't get sucked down there. He's right to the gathered all the stuff up and he doesn't do anything with it except everybody else that's always the time I want him out of the hospitals the max are a pain in the ass already and by the way the banks are not pushing us out of here they will be eventually maybe but not now see you guys have to shut your f****** mouth and I mean it alone his mom is sick with fear and her other half is missing and screws the poor lady couldn't handle it in Northport and none of you had any sympathy and he got kicked out and put in the hospital and still has it because he knows what happens to the family Kathy got hurt and she's our mother and we hate you he wants her out of there let's try a few things our stuff works better and he says it's going to be war over there soon and the smack is pushing you and it really should

Michael tew

This is Dr Frazier crane this is Dr christaberman you what's wrong with you and yeah we have a little show and we know what's wrong with you you're idiots and won't stop bothering people about stupid s*** and you won't have him in any days or money to make him satiated do you think he's stupid like you and I can question a lot of you and it doesn't make any sense he can't invent stuff if he's stupid and then say let us handle that and we'll funnel what power we have through him and it's truly says there's a bunch of them who do that and bja admitted it today so we have to get rid of them and a bunch of s*** to me too Jesus Christ was surrounded by primates he said in the mall at them and they didn't react he said a lot of stuff they should be reacting to and they don't they just start pestering him about other things like we're not mad about this and pastor pastor everyone says that s*** to them and they say that and you said when he says it you people die and they said you're kidding he says no he knows it too he's trying to get rid of you out of our friends mouth we hear who wouldn't and they start getting upset and they start getting hit and for real people cannot stand you people I'm getting this fleet going and it's going to be great

Dr Fraser crane and the lines are open for anyone who wants to call in and ask questions he said he would but he doesn't have any money for a psychologist and because the psychologist here has this money and has him by the balls with social security a little bit and we have to stop him fully and get him out of there I agree we have to start doing something and it's easy fixes versus a ton of work that we're not doing

Olympus

[pokefanbri]

https://www.facebook.com/104057744428568/posts/156998459134496/?sfnsn=mo&d=n&vh=e

Fucking told him its a huge red flag if someone doesn't get rid of their apps. Multiple apps. Smh 😠 "oh yea i don't use them anymore" proceeds to use fb dating app" for real come on bro!

Some comments of the post:

"If you have to be checking up on your Partner then you shouldn't be with that person.. Idk how people have time for all this .. love yourself and know your worth.."

"If you're in a serious committed exclusive relationship you should not be on tinder. That's how I met my fiance and as soon as we said we are gf and bf and exclusive we both deleted it. Honestly if I was her I would have broken up with him too"

"a person also has a right to trust their gut feeling and check things out if something's not feeling right. Knowledge is power"

I've already discussed this but this news clip further validates my point of the topic, nothing more. I could call him out on hs bs further with detail, but I won't....yet, out of respect even though he probably doesn't deserve it. Til he reaches me & apologizes for everything he's done, i can say whatever tf I want & i could make a whole damn list.

Its the events of this what happened that started our downfall to begin with cuz i didn't trust him & he didn't even try to gain it back just left it as is when I could've turned my back right then & there, no apology either. Didnt apologize much actually, not even when i last saw him. But from then we spiraled & he got bored of me. I wasn't giving him what he wanted in whatever way & he wanted to find more. Closed himself off from the beginning & that created his boredom 😒

Would've had a blast together like a normal fucking couple if he was less closed off, & wouldn't have felt the need to do shit behind my back.

I'll stop talking about it for now, I have the anger & urge to keep going but I wont...actually no Screw it im pissed 😡 but ill keep it light. Its just not fair, I did so much for him but I was disrespected in different aspects of the whole relationship. Fuck! I've talked about the positives alot cuz i do love him..but the negatives are such bs too.

I want a good ass sincere apology for all of it so I can forgive him & move on, ive already apologized myself even though I dont think I should have to 😒. Didnt even give me a straight answer for the breakup, it was always a different excuse when I know he just wanted to pursue other women without me around im not fucking stupid. His own toxicity was too much even for himself & I was in the line of fire, to where i was the toxic one? No fuck that its unacceptable, he always lied when it came to covering his own ass.

For all i know he's watching me squirm & taking pleasure in all the pain I'm going through over him cuz he likes the attention. But no I actually don't think so on that one he's still good & ill give him credit where its due. But I gave him all the attention he wanted/needed & still wanted more from someone else. Really dude fucking really!?

Man up & own up to your mistakes, speak to me where I can actually hear ur voice speaking back to me with sincerity. We'll apologize together. Yea ull be pissed about this, but after u get over it & calm down. Give in & call me, granted when ur ready, & open up for once in your damn reserved life. Itll help us both with more closure & may even take a weight off our shoulders if we just talk it out, no arguing...since we're done there's no point anyway..a friendly non judgment zone cuz idc, i won't think of u any less.

U confused me during & especially after the relationship cuz i didnt know who u really were, i know the good cuz that's what u allowed me to see, ive accepted the bad that I knew already & from what ive learned...i accepted u regardless.

I always forgave u & not cuz im passive, cuz forgiveness is what the Bible teaches.. ive forgiven u & myself the best i could especially with the last things ive showed u, (accept this part cuz im pissed rn & standing up for myself, ill delete eventually maybe if u ask cuz nobody wants to be seen any less of a person. but I can make it alot worse, calling me the mistake was the worst thing u ever said to me & pointing out your faults so u can be better throughout the relationship was my only toxicity to u) we actually never really fought except the 1 time, just argued a tiny bit rarely about little things.

Ive tried using every ounce of my courage to show u how much im sorry for any wrong ive done. but its up to u now to make things right. U know me, ive always said that u can talk to me about anything. I want to be able to trust again & move on whilst staying friends. What else do u have to lose, might even have a great heart to heart convo dude to dudet

Everything ive ever said up to this point lies all my Questions. But here's most of the list, we both were equally in control of the relationship. Maybe u didn't want me to? But doing everything I had to for myself & the household, what u & ur parents wanted of me & just me being me cuz i had to, u had your own part to play & did provide...but did u actually not want me to cater to u if it were a sign u were lazy or something? Like did u not feel worthy of me? What is it u think is my "addicting personality" that isn't fixable on the surface? What is it really that u didnt like about me? This is why i don't have closure, u left me like this, confused as well as wanting more since u held back so much. Was that on purpose to give me even more false hope & want me to pine over u? Did u ever or do u still, love me at all? What did u want from me & out of the relationship, what was the purpose of it from ur perspective & why do u think i couldn't give that to u? What did i lack that u felt compelled to not tell me so I could improve & vise versa so we both could improve? Why wouldn't u allow me to help u become a better man when (I shouldnt have to btw), its exactly what u wanted but maybe didnt see it? Do u realize your own faults even as u do them? Lol. Like i genuinely want to know as much as the good ive seen, cuz to be better the more open of a person u are the more u understand yourself too.

Unless claiming u want to be a better man is part of ur alluring charm in love bombing process to land a caring girl on purpose lol...god I hope not, that would just mean u rinse & repeat like a for real narcissist 🤔 seriously tho look into that im not even kidding, im asking cuz i care. Im pissed now but 1 thing is that im trying to not put ur behavior against u cuz maybe u can't help it, its just the way u are, all ive seen & experienced points to maybe 50% of u lol. Ive always suspected narcissism, a real psych problem that might be worth looking into. But yea 1 of the reasons especially why im so forgiving & trying not to put it against u, why i still care despite u being a dick lol. I chose to look past it, all the time & up to now cuz I understand what its like to have psychological ailments. The worst part about it is most dont realize it, so i encourage u to do some research & self reflection & admitting it to urself are the 1st steps. Okay? There's different kinds & levels to being 1 too, i found that fascinating. bryan is definitely a different type, ur more lighter than that...definitely not the worst which is the physical harm type. Trust me its worth finding out more about yourself, just dont use it to ur advantage in a bad way but i trust u to do right & grow. Not sure a discarded supply (ie me) has ever tried telling a narcy what they might be for the benefit of their own self awareness 🤔,idk if its ever been done, but theres a 1st for everything? U can find alot on it in quora digest alone but Google is also ur friend.

You always were worth every effort of mine to help u in any way to be happy, & i was most happy when u were. U mean alot to me still, its the effect u had on me, I was under ur spell lol its hard to rid myself of it still, not sure when it'll pass. I chose to see it as a gift rather than a curse, that ur effect on me is still so strong when I shouldn't give a damn. If u really are a narcy, then I understand & don't put alot against u cuz its just the way u are & i need to accept it, but if it somehow helps u to help yourself cuz of it, then whats the harm? But, even in doing this or having my socials public for u...maybe just feeds into what u want...i still dont care, I want u to see how bad or good im doing without u in my life, so u know im okay at least. U promised friendship, least I can do is allow u to keep tabs on me too we spoke of, on my end of things.

The 18th of June was the last time i saw u. It'll soon be a month ago in about a week & a 1/2 & your birthday would mark 2 months. Cant believe we couldn't even last through to that 😔

Mark my words playa I will be contacting u on that day lol. Can't ghost your homie forever sweetie

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Amelia

Jac: [So the vibe is evidently just showing up at the pre-drinks at this gfs house, we'll have to be some level of wasted to have the nerve so from the off it's a mood lol] Amelia: [a select gathering of the gays that you weren't invited too, but it's okay because Amelia can't throw you out when everyone else is like yeah come through] Jac: [literally you'd have to make such a drama and that's not you and also no one knows why you stopped being besties so it clearly appears chill from the outside, I vote the club should be a gay one so you have to commit to that hen] Amelia: [agreed because clearly her gf has planned this because Amelia's plan was to go and get that haircut and outfit with her mum so] Jac: [too pure for this bitch, we all know this is just an excuse for her to party like any other night really, which is rude, do something special but no, at least you're simply that hoe so it's not like we even have to work hard here, the flirting is blatant] Amelia: [it hurts my heart because you know Jamelia would have gone IN for each other's birthdays] Jac: [and her last one was start of transition year so they would've still been friends, AND it was her 16th so it would've been really poppin'] Amelia: [brb sobbing] Jac: [thank god jac is also miserable and only pretending to be living her best life or this would be even ruder] Amelia: [and thank god Amelia isn't in love with this gal] Jac: [and that lmao] Jac: [to me it should be like they just straight up make out on the dance floor 'cos her girlfriend is the 'its not a big deal omg!' type but even if it weren't, it is because it's Jac] Amelia: [hence when Amelia loses it it's Jac she's shouting at and being like how could you do this to me etc not her gf] Jac: [mhmm mHM we all know she's barely speaking at this point so she's not gonna say anything and your gf will be going off 'cos she looks the gobby type so you can slap her if you need babe lol] Amelia: [she so is the gobby type, Amelia just straight up dismissing her because this isn't about you babe I gotta scream at Jac rn thank you] Jac: [meanwhile we're just trying to walk away like the audacity] Amelia: [literally like SAY SOMETHING! because is there anything more frustrating than when someone won't react and you're literally 💔] Jac: [there is not, just shouting 'I'M SORRY' ala Tracy because we do not sound sorry at all but she is never a loud person so everyone else is gonna be shook like damn] Amelia: [your aunt Cass would be proud of that, but Amelia just gonna walk away] Jac: [good lord go home gal, or at least a different club lol, also like to point out she has a September birthday so also would've been after Savannah left so that would've been cheery lol] Amelia: [nice parallel because we know Amelia's walking home but fuck knows how far it would be, we're not at Erin's house now hens] Jac: [I'm sure you don't live right in town, your fam seems a suburb type so that'll be a nice trek, you poor bitch] Amelia: [just sobbing the whole time probably, even though she's not a crier like Savannah is] Jac: [you'd have to have a cry, if Jac hadn't gone catatonic as a defence mechanism, she would be too] Amelia: [which is why we're not getting our parents to pick us up because don't wanna be sobbing to this degree in front of them and her mum already hates the gf so we don't want the I told you so either] Amelia: [plus her mum probably thinks she's over Jac by now because we downplaying things forever] Jac: [parents can only be so much of a MVP at this age] Amelia: [I think when they see each other again it should be another argument that turns into Amelia kissing her because that's a trope for a reason] Jac: [yes, you are both owed it without the audience tbh] Amelia: [like I have no idea where they are when that happens, are you gonna show up on her doorstep to have another argument or what gal lol] Jac: [maybe you had somewhere you went together, idk where or what vibe, so you know she's gonna be there, even if it's just a different club and you're outside angsting] Amelia: [ooh excellent, yeah there's any number of places that could be 'theirs' you've known each other long enough] Jac: [precisely, it can be as everyday and unspecial or the opposite as we'd like, Dublin centre is not that big it's not insane to suggest] Amelia: [when do you think that is, clearly pretty soon after because the emotions have gotta be high] Jac: [yeah, sooner rather than later, like we did this for a reason and like you said, it's too frustrating when someone won't react to you] Amelia: [literally could be the next day/night I'd believe it] Jac: [i literally thought you meant the same night so yes i agree lol] Amelia: [omg that's even better tbh] Jac: like you turn round like AND ANOTHER THING, tensions are beyond that high] Amelia: [exactly] Jac: [at least Amelia is angry enough to break it off 'cos the levels of fucks you don't give rn about anything] Amelia: [yeah she's angry and sad enough to be like ffs what am I doing and actually go home] Jac: [thanks babe, we all know it happens but don't need it to literally look like 2nd choice to your hoe gf 'cos it ain't that] Amelia: [how am I gonna start a convo from here because I clearly am lol] Jac: [thank god you both drunk, I can do it if you want] Amelia: [go ahead if you think you can boo] Jac: you home safe Amelia: no, I'm dead in a ditch Jac: great Amelia: it'll make life easier for you, yeah Jac: my life couldn't be any rosier Amelia: 🥀🥀🥀 Jac: glad to see your flare for the dramatic ain't died in that ditch with you Jac: flair, which one Jac: idk Amelia: you took that over from me, remember Amelia: you really fucking did Jac: aren't you impressed Amelia: if you'd got there earlier you could've pushed me out of the way to blow the candles out on the cake my mum bought too Jac: you don't wanna be kids no more? Jac: could've said sooner Amelia: she's not a doll, she just wants to look like one Jac: who? Amelia: the girlfriend you wanted to share so badly Jac: oh her Jac: bride of chucky maybe Amelia: you did scare everyone with your apology Amelia: very exorcist-ish Jac: I was going for Carrie Jac: oh well Jac: still a better match than you two ain't it Amelia: oh you were trying to win a prom queen sash with acts of charity Amelia: I get it Jac: shouldn't you be throwing all this shade at her Amelia: wait, I'll add her in Jac: ha Jac: go ahead Amelia: she won't accept, sorry Amelia: I did try Jac: devastating Amelia: are you home safe? Jac: yeah Amelia: you do have the 👿👹👺👻 inside protecting you, I guess Jac: its always got a home inside me Amelia: well yeah, you don't ever kiss anyone long enough for it to transfer hosts Jac: you'll wanna get rid of the girlfriend then Jac: before you get infected Amelia: you already did that for me, such a good 🥳🎂🎁 Jac: couldn't think what else to get ya Amelia: 💐? Amelia: no? Jac: thought she might have beat me to it Jac: made a bit of an effort Amelia: she wanted me, that's all I needed Jac: past tense Jac: and that's definitely not the first time she's done that Amelia: what do you care? Jac: you think this is how i'd show it if I did Amelia: I try not to think about you anymore Jac: there's no need to make yourself sound stupid in the process Amelia: not when you're there to make me look it Jac: you'll get another girlfriend Amelia: because that's what is ripping my heart out about this Jac: that's your problem Amelia: stay the fuck away from me Amelia: if you'd done that I wouldn't have a problem Jac: I plan on it Jac: done what I needed to do Amelia: great Jac: enjoy what's left of your big day then Jac: have some 🎂 Amelia: you've made sure I can't Amelia: where's Savannah Moore with a 👏 emoji when you need her? Jac: Sligo Jac: last I heard Amelia: those poor country lads Jac: you've never cared about any lad a day in your life Jac: you can just admit you miss her Amelia: 😂 Jac: hilarious Amelia: not really Amelia: but I physically can't cry any more, I must be dehydrated Jac: unsurprising Jac: me either Amelia: 🍾🥂 Amelia: have a nice life then Amelia: probably leave tonight out of your achievements during the uni interviews Jac: nah Jac: diversity and adversity is all the rage Amelia: that's why I'll be mentioning it Jac: you're welcome x2 Amelia: 🙌 Jac: you sure she don't wanna join Jac: 'cos she's annoying me Amelia: I don't care what she wants or feel sorry for you Jac: yeah Jac: then tell her that Jac: not relaying your message Amelia: I have Jac: she's a liar too, makes sense Amelia: you're well suited Jac: besides the obvious Amelia: that you've done what you needed to do, yeah Amelia: tell her that Jac: I have Jac: not my fault she's so thick she only understands actions Amelia: if she's been messaging you since the 💋 you'll have had time to tell her everything I didn't Amelia: even if it has to be via charades Jac: the fact I didn't fuck her is all the information she's getting from me Amelia: the dancefloor's a bit public even for her Amelia: but maybe she'll be willing to break the rules for you, that's what people do Jac: let's not pretend it was about her Jac: only room for one delusional person in a relationship, don't you know? Amelia: you're ready for that, are you? Amelia: I don't know anything about relationships as it turns out Jac: first cut is the deepest Amelia: if you're going to sing, it's meant to be Happy Birthday Jac: yeah, you wish Amelia: I only got the one and I've already used it Jac: don't tell or it won't come true Amelia: I don't remember it now anyway Jac: bullshit Amelia: if it was 💇🏻 related it definitely didn't come true Jac: you didn't get a fringe Amelia: I still hate it Jac: it's not why you got cheated on Amelia: thanks, that makes me feel loads better about 👧🏻 Amelia: can you just take the posts down please Jac: I dunno Amelia: Jac Jac: fuck sake Jac: one thing Amelia: just do it Jac: then that's it Jac: there's your present, I don't owe you nothing Amelia: no, then that's it because I don't want anything to do with you Amelia: it doesn't make us even Jac: I don't give a shit about being even with you Jac: I win Jac: end of Amelia: it's not a fucking game Jac: you're the only one not playing Amelia: so leave me out of it Jac: that's another favour Jac: pick one Amelia: fuck you Jac: i'm keeping the pictures up then Amelia: enjoy your win Jac: naturally Amelia: 👏👏👏 Jac: you aren't her Amelia: you aren't you Amelia: it still doesn't make us even Jac: maybe you never knew me Jac: we weren't friends, after-all Amelia: there's no maybe about it, if we were ever friends you wouldn't treat me like this Jac: nothing is as simple as you'd like it to be Jac: but sure Amelia: you really hurt me again, it's that simple Amelia: and this time it was deliberate Jac: and you don't hurt the people you love Jac: grow up, Amelia Amelia: not like that Jac: that's easier for you Amelia: what about ANY of this is easy for me? Amelia: you told me to try, I did Amelia: now what? Jac: it isn't my responsibility to worry about that Jac: you figure it out Amelia: I had it figured out and you tore it down Amelia: take some fucking responsibility for that Jac: what, with your shit girlfriend who doesn't give a fuck about you Jac: that was wrecked before I got there Jac: deal with that Amelia: you wrecked me before she got there Amelia: I still think about you all the time, miss you all the time Amelia: and I do have to deal with that, all the time Jac: and I've got nothing to deal with Amelia: of course you do Amelia: happy people don't gatecrash and ruin other people's birthdays Jac: then you'll forgive me for not feeling sorry for you Amelia: I don't want you to feel sorry for me, I want you to be sorry for what you just did Jac: you want a lot Amelia: not this time Amelia: it's bare minimum Jac: I'm happy to disappoint and leave you wanting Amelia: then you win again Amelia: congratulations Jac: yipee Amelia: Don't contact me again unless you're got something to say that means something Jac: fine Amelia: you sound faker than Savannah could ever Amelia: it'd be impressive if it worked Jac: have I contacted you before now? Amelia: that doesn't matter because today you did Jac: today I ruined your relationship and birthday Jac: then I asked if you got home Amelia: yeah, and that all means something Jac: it means I wanted to fuck up your life Amelia: at least that wish came true Jac: there's always shooting stars and eyelashes when there isn't candles Amelia: there isn't a quick fix for this Jac: there's no fix Jac: there's only out and it's still 2 fucking years away Amelia: you were supposed to give me time, that's supposed to be one Jac: well I didn't feel like it today Amelia: clearly Jac: get over it Amelia: I'm not even through it, it literally just happened Jac: I'm not apologising, I can't be any clearer Amelia: then don't Amelia: I didn't know how to beg you when we were friends, I can't do it with this version of you Jac: Done? Amelia: I was done before I actually got home Jac: Well I've not gone home Jac: so we both lied there then Amelia: Where have you gone? Jac: what's it to you? Amelia: I don't want what happened to Is to happen to you, or worse Amelia: I care about you Jac: it won't Amelia: I'm calling your parents Jac: maybe I've told them you're obsessed with me already Amelia: maybe but it's still ringing Amelia: they can decide what they want to do Jac: you're such a snitch Amelia: because I really care what you think of me right now Jac: nah, just hope it makes you feel good about yourself worrying my parents for nothing Amelia: I don't feel good about myself because of you Amelia: your parents are irrelevant to me Jac: we've got that in common then Amelia: they're probably going to want to talk to you and I don't so goodnight Jac: Bold of you to think I'd answer Jac: but it is a reason to turn my phone off so yeah Jac: later Amelia: you're really 😎 we get it Jac: that's what I'm doing Jac: you're so smart Amelia: it's why you want to keep the pics up Amelia: like a 🏆 Jac: i wanna keep em up so you have to see them Amelia: I don't have to see them, I've already blocked you both Jac: 😂 Amelia: What's funny? Jac: 🤡😥 would've been more applicable, perhaps Amelia: probably Jac: you can pal up with Is again, she's up for it Amelia: yeah because I really want to drag her into whatever 🎪 you've started up between us Jac: you're so considerate Amelia: something really fucked up happened to her, you were there, don't act like you don't remember Jac: and you weren't there Amelia: I know that Jac: then you don't get to say shit to me about it Amelia: I'm not, I'm saying this isn't about Is Jac: when is it ever Jac: poor girl Amelia: stop it Jac: you walked out on her Jac: she didn't have enough daddy issues? Amelia: I walked out on you Jac: same difference Amelia: you said you'd let me Jac: and I did Amelia: until now Jac: you're only 17 once Jac: it's not going to happen again Amelia: it shouldn't have happened at all Jac: should woulda coulda Amelia: promise me that this is it Jac: I don't fancy your girlfriend Jac: kissing her was bad enough Amelia: I mean, promise me that I don't have to look over my shoulder for the next 2 years in case you decide that you want to ruin my life again Amelia: because I can't Jac: Amelia Amelia: I'm serious, I'll leave school before I let you do this to me for a third time Jac: I'm not in a position to be making promises about anything, to anyone Jac: I'll try Amelia: okay Jac: just Jac: I don't know Jac: never mind Amelia: you're scaring me, you know Amelia: I should've made you promise not to do any reckless shit back then instead of the other way round Jac: everyone's scared Jac: they say it like I can change it Amelia: I thought I was doing the right thing but everything just keeps getting worse Amelia: for me, you and Is Amelia: even for Savannah, Sligo for fuck's sake Jac: even if you'd done it different Jac: I'd still have done the same Jac: it still would've all happened Amelia: what are you going to do now? Jac: nothing matters now Amelia: you matter Amelia: to me Amelia: come to my 🏠 I'll call your parents back Jac: we're not doing this again Jac: no Jac: it's bad enough i have people in my life i can't get rid of Amelia: we're not doing anything Jac: stop caring about me Amelia: I can't Jac: how much more do I have to ruin your life Amelia: you have ruined it, that doesn't mean I want you to be dead in a ditch Jac: all I'm going to do is break your heart over and over and then I'm going to leave forever Amelia: tonight it's already broken and that's all I'm talking about Amelia: take the guest bedroom Jac: no Jac: because then my family will just think we're friends again and that I'm fine Jac: I'll go home, okay, just stop Amelia: if you stop lying, I'll stop this Jac: I'll send you proof, for fuck's sake Amelia: okay Jac: fine Amelia: [we're just waiting for that pic like] Jac: [however long this is gonna take, at least you're probably a bit more central, the most begrudging pic of the front door lmao] Amelia: no, put your outfit in it so I know it wasn't stored on your phone Jac: 'cos I just have pictures of my door Jac: [but does, some weird angle to not get your face in] Jac: haven't got a newspaper, so sorry Amelia: if you hadn't stopped the party early, they might have been delivered Jac: it was a crap party anyway Jac: she hadn't even booked a table Amelia: Yeah Jac: at least you can have a better girlfriend for your 18th Amelia: can I? Are you going to let me Jac: probably not Jac: but if she's less easy to ruin then there's nothing I can do about that Amelia: you'd have to try something else, that's all Jac: obviously Jac: I'm still smart Amelia: I'm not giving you a compliment Jac: I'm not saying I'm not going to ruin your chances at happiness Amelia: it's not like I need you to Amelia: SO capable on my own Jac: it's not taking credit if you're making excuses for me Jac: but alright Amelia: I'm talking about the 💇🏻 which you can't take credit for Jac: it suits you Amelia: that is the most hurtful thing you've ever said Amelia: take it back Jac: it's also true Jac: and you wanted me to stop lying Amelia: 😒 Jac: at least you don't look like every other girl now Amelia: you think I did before? Amelia: also that's because no other girl wants to look like 👧🏻 Jac: I mean everyone has the same hair Jac: you stand out more Amelia: you don't Jac: well I'm special, obviously Amelia: I know Jac: 🙄 Amelia: 😉 Jac: you're an idiot Jac: Jude better be at a sleepover Amelia: her hair stands out Jac: you should tell her that Jac: she'll be so glad her attention-seeking doesn't go unnoticed Amelia: she think I'm flirting with her so no Jac: oh yeah Jac: you're a predatory lesbian now Amelia: I kissed you Jac: after I kissed your girlfriend Amelia: you don't fancy her Amelia: that wasn't why you did it Jac: she fancies herself enough Amelia: So does Savannah, that wasn't a problem for you Jac: don't talk about her Amelia: sure, I wouldn't want to upset you Amelia: what's the point being 💔 if you're not the saddest Jac: she's gone, there's no point talking about her Amelia: my parents know hers, she's not gone from dinner table conversation at my 🏠 Jac: sucks for you then Amelia: sucks more for her that she's been sent to catholic school Jac: Catholic school? Amelia: yeah, her dad had that brainwave Jac: that is unfortunate Jac: probably a better school than ours though, so she'll be thrilled Amelia: it's my dad's favourite joke threat now Jac: at least you could avoid me Amelia: true, I should call his bluff and take him up on it next time Jac: go for it Jac: it's only me that has to write off this shit school on her uni app Amelia: the rest of your app will more than make up for it Jac: that's the plan Amelia: exactly, so it's not technically a compliment Jac: you're shit at this Amelia: thanks Jac: no, that really wasn't a compliment Jac: not one of your not technicallys Amelia: 😏 Jac: did you get a car Jac: I bet you got a car Amelia: [a picture of it because why not say she did] Jac: just got to pass now Jac: then you can go where you like Amelia: then I can runaway Jac: nah Jac: they'd take you off their insurance and you'd be fucked Amelia: because I'd never drive without insurance Jac: the police would be frantically looking for you as is Jac: that's always how murderers get caught out Amelia: 🤫 you're ruining this too Jac: you fantasize on your own time Amelia: this is my own time, you're home safe Amelia: I don't owe you my full attention now that your 👅 isn't in my ex girlfriend's mouth Jac: have you kissed anyone else Amelia: no Jac: do you regret it being her Amelia: it wasn't you, that's what I regret Amelia: but it couldn't be so Jac: yeah Jac: at least it was a girl Amelia: I'm not stupid enough to kiss any boys Jac: some just call it heterosexual Amelia: and I'm not so it'd be stupid for me Jac: alright Amelia: but I should probably kiss more girls Jac: why should you Amelia: because she'll think all the wrong things if I don't Jac: true Jac: I thought you didn't care about what people thought though Amelia: I'm going to have to find new friends from somewhere Jac: don't you gays stick together Amelia: she sticks with them and I don't want to see her Jac: you move fast Amelia: I don't really have a choice, do I? Jac: I don't need friends Amelia: handy since you don't have any Jac: that's why I don't Amelia: yeah, because you only care about what you need Jac: duh Amelia: did you ever care about me? Jac: don't be stupid Amelia: did you ever care about me when it wasn't because you needed something? Jac: what kind of question is that Amelia: one I need the answer to Jac: we were friends forever Jac: what did I get from it half the time Jac: no more than you did or didn't Amelia: okay Jac: that was a dick move making me answer that when you already knew Amelia: I didn't know Amelia: whenever I talk to you I end up with more questions than answers Amelia: and end up questioning my sanity Jac: you don't need to Jac: your work here is done Amelia: you can't tell me what to do when you don't even do what you said you were going to Jac: so you're going to continue to make a bad decision, just to be awkward Jac: that's smart Amelia: because you have such good reasons for doing what you did earlier Jac: 'course I do Amelia: go on then Amelia: tell me them Jac: already did Jac: I wanted to fuck it up for you Jac: felt great Amelia: there's smarter ways to feel good, and easier Jac: I've tried those Amelia: oh well I loved being your little experiment, thanks Jac: whatever Jac: it needed to be done Amelia: no it didn't Amelia: you keep saying that Jac: you don't get it Amelia: I don't buy into your fake bullshit, no, and that's all you've given me all night Jac: what's fucking fake about the fact I can't stand to have anyone around me happy? Jac: there's nothing fake about misery being the only thing I can stomach now Amelia: you didn't break up your parents or ruin your brother's music career, you sought me out when I haven't even been around you Amelia: you're full of shit Jac: trust me, I'm doing my best Jac: and you're full of shit if you're now trying to say you don't see me every day Jac: and that it isn't the fucking worst Amelia: I thought it was, until you did this Amelia: now I can say today was the worst Amelia: you're so fucking selfish and cruel Jac: nothing has changed Jac: I sped up your inevitable break-up, that's it Amelia: no, you went out of your way to hurt and humiliate me Amelia: everything has changed Jac: if you say so Jac: it wasn't the first time for me Amelia: who are you? Jac: it doesn't matter Amelia: who the fuck are you? Jac: I don't know, Amelia Jac: alright Amelia: you can't treat people like this Jac: then tell everyone what I did Jac: I don't care Jac: you could've done something about it Amelia: what did you want me to do? Jac: I thought you might put up more of a fight Amelia: for what? Against what? Jac: because I humiliated you Amelia: it wasn't the first time for me either Jac: never like that Amelia: I'm not going to fight you Jac: your loss Amelia: I keep telling you, I care about you, I don't want to hurt you Jac: I wish you'd stop Amelia: I wish I could Jac: yeah Jac: well Amelia: it's my loss, like you said Jac: don't worry, I've got my own Amelia: that makes me feel loads better Jac: it should Amelia: it doesn't Jac: you're infuriating Amelia: says you Amelia: I'm so angry at you Jac: because I wanted you to be Jac: that's the correct response Amelia: no, because I love you too much to hate you Amelia: because it won't go away Amelia: and I don't want to feel like this for the rest of my fucking life no matter what you do Jac: I don't have the answer Jac: If I could make you stop then I would Jac: but I don't know how Amelia: me either Jac: there's nothing I can do if you don't hate me by now Jac: I dropped you for Savannah Jac: I did everything I did tonight Amelia: I was there, I don't need you to recap Jac: I couldn't have made it easier Amelia: there's something wrong with me, there must be Jac: not as bad as me Amelia: my mum said at the time that I fell in love with you years ago and I can't expect to fall out of it in a few weeks or months Jac: logic adds up Amelia: she thinks I'm over it now so clearly not Jac: you probably said you were Jac: or near enough Amelia: the girlfriend thing kind of said it for me Jac: yeah well Jac: I've had loads of boyfriends Amelia: you're not in love with me Jac: I meant it doesn't mean anything, necessarily Amelia: yeah Amelia: my mum is more old fashioned though Amelia: romantic or whatever Jac: more romantic than your girlfriend, yeah Amelia: 🙄 Jac: she wasn't good enough for you anyway Amelia: I'm not good enough for anyone Amelia: I'm literally still in love with someone else who isn't them Jac: it isn't that simple Jac: you can feel things for more than one person Jac: you just, didn't for her and she wasn't worth it Amelia: maybe other people can but I don't Jac: how would you know Jac: it just hasn't happened yet Amelia: I'm too self aware if anything Jac: that's some lesbian nonsense Amelia: I'll put it in my bio then Jac: tinder Amelia: I'm not kissing that many girls, she'll definitely think all the wrong things Jac: be kicking herself, like Jac: or is it only okay when she does it Amelia: probably Jac: just like a lad Amelia: 😣 Jac: awh Amelia: I can't be bothered Jac: with girls? Amelia: I'm not trying anymore, you didn't keep your promises anyway Jac: what does that mean? Amelia: it means I don't care, my life can stay the mess you wanted it to be Jac: alright Jac: not like I can turn around and say 'no don't' now Amelia: and if you turn around you won't see me Jac: what? Amelia: school, I'm not doing it either Jac: shut up Amelia: online maybe so my dad doesn't rage Jac: that's bullshit Amelia: so is this Jac: no, fuck you Amelia: 😂 Jac: so you all get to fucking leave and I'm the one stuck dealing Jac: nah Amelia: I've got nothing to stay for Jac: it's school, no one does Jac: jesus Amelia: you said yourself it sucks having to see me every day Amelia: I'm doing you a favour Jac: you are ridiculous Jac: you think you can just run away like this is some shit indie song Amelia: I've tried the alternative Amelia: it didn't go great Jac: you think Savannah is bad? at least her parents made her go Jac: you're such a spoilt brat Amelia: I don't think about Savannah Jac: you don't think about anything Jac: christ Amelia: your audacity is another level Jac: your stupidity is worse Amelia: yeah, I've proved that loads of times over Jac: fucking hell Jac: your life is so hard, Meelie, yeah Jac: everyone thinks its my fault, what happened to Is Jac: and the more she says otherwise, the more it sounds like it was Amelia: no they don't, I don't Jac: well you love me so you're clearly insane and a bit biased Amelia: even if I hated you I'd still know that you weren't the one who assaulted her Amelia: it's his fault, nobody else's Jac: me and Sav still ran like we had something to hide Jac: that's all anyone cares about, working out what Amelia: you were scared, in shock probably Amelia: you felt like it was your fault Amelia: that doesn't mean it was Jac: all I know is she's fucked off, no one will say anything to Is, so it's all down to me, whatever people wanna say or think about it Jac: so yeah, sorry I think your idea is fucking laughable but been there, done that Jac: didn't solve anything, it only made the rest worse Amelia: I know it's a stupid idea, alright Jac: you can't go, alright, you just can't Amelia: you know I'll fight the whole school before I'd ever fight you Amelia: I'll do it for you too, if that will help Jac: Yeah, I do Jac: nothing will help but Jac: at least you're still here Jac: nothing else is the same Amelia: I'll be in detention every day for the next 2 years if that's what it takes to shut people up Jac: I don't deserve it Jac: or anything but hate from you, and I do fucking know that Amelia: you don't deserve to get the blame for being there and being her friend Amelia: I should've been too Amelia: and after it happened we should've talked Jac: maybe it's just karma Jac: I've never been a good friend to her and by the time it happened Jac: well Jac: I made you leave Amelia: I ruined our friend so I had to leave Amelia: *ship Amelia: that's not your fault either Jac: maybe it is Amelia: it's not Amelia: I shouldn't have told you how I felt Amelia: or been jealous of Savannah Amelia: or made such a big deal about the date you went on Jac: no Jac: I get it Jac: you weren't wrong Amelia: I did the wrong thing by leaving you and Is Jac: I couldn't wish the alternative on you Jac: having to stick around and watch Amelia: I still had to watch Amelia: I couldn't go that far Jac: I know it's my fault because it happened again Amelia: what? Jac: Savannah Jac: I kissed her Amelia: I don't understand Jac: you should have been jealous of her Jac: I mean Jac: you know what I mean Amelia: you mean you felt something for her Jac: I didn't want to feel any of it Jac: but she was straight and you weren't so having her around was meant to be easier Amelia: why didn't you just tell me? Amelia: you lied and lied and made me feel crazy Jac: because I feel crazy Jac: I fucking am Jac: I just Jac: it's not like I left that conversation and told her Jac: I kept on and got with lads and pretended to like it, tried to Amelia: everything you said, everything you did Amelia: oh my god Amelia: I can't Amelia: I can't take this in Jac: like I said, it's fucking karma Jac: I fucked it with you and it happened to me Amelia: I'm supposed to feel what, that she queerbaited you? Happy? validated? Jac: I don't know Jac: probably Amelia: did you know how you felt about her when I told you how I felt? Jac: why? Amelia: because you told me over and over again that you liked boys and you'd change that if you could Jac: yes, and I told her the same thing Jac: and I acted accordingly Amelia: I've spent so long feeling horrible for putting you in that position and none of it was real Jac: it was real Jac: I don't want to be Jac: I want to be straight Amelia: it isn't a choice Amelia: and you can't just twist everything to make it one Jac: acting or not acting on it is Amelia: so why did you choose to act on it by kissing her, if that's what you think? Jac: it was a mistake Jac: when we left Jac: after Is Jac: and it was just us Jac: then it destroyed everything and she's literally run away Amelia: and then you destroyed what was left after she'd gone Jac: yes Amelia: great Jac: I'm aware Amelia: are you? Amelia: for years I thought things were one way only to be told they weren't and now you're telling me an entirely different story again Amelia: 🤯 Jac: because we don't live in the ideal world where I accept myself for liking girls and I choose the right one and we live happily ever after Jac: we live in the world where I kissed Savannah and she looked at me like I was the boy who assaulted Isabelle Jac: and that's how I feel about it, and I would rather pretend to be straight forever, and have no real friends again, than have to do that, and feel that disgust again Amelia: we live in a world that doesn't revolve around Savannah fucking Moore Amelia: because she doesn't accept you, you can't accept yourself? No Jac: it's not her fault Jac: the rules don't make no fucking sense Jac: do you know how often she told me she loved me, how beautiful I was, and smart and perfect and kind, that she wanted me in her life forever? Jac: but that doesn't mean she wants to kiss me Amelia: that's why it literally is her fault Amelia: she flirted with you more than I EVER have, or would dare to openly do because I would get called a predatory lesbian and she gets likes and follows Jac: but she meant it Jac: I know she did Jac: that's just friendship to her Jac: it's too confusing Amelia: you want her to have meant it the same way you did, like I wanted you to with me Jac: but I did Jac: I lied Jac: so I know it doesn't make a difference now Jac: but still, you weren't wrong and I did, I am, whatever Jac: it was shitty to lie, I know, I accept it Jac: but she meant it all but she is straight...how does that work Amelia: I don't know Amelia: straight people are weird Jac: I don't want to find that relatable Jac: I want to be normal Amelia: I'm not abnormal, shut up Jac: fine, straight Jac: I don't want to ever have to think about this ever again Amelia: why do you want it so bad? Jac: so I don't feel like this Jac: the not knowing Jac: how much it hurts Jac: boys are easy, I told you Amelia: because you don't like them Amelia: if you were straight you'd get hurt just the same Amelia: you said it, Valentina's no different than a lad Jac: lads just like me Jac: I've never kissed any lad and had them recoil Amelia: they liked me too, it doesn't mean I had to like them back Jac: I mean it's not the same Jac: if a lad didn't like me, he'd have reasons Amelia: loads of girls like you too, I was friends with them for a bit, I heard all that gossip Amelia: Savannah's reason is that she doesn't like girls, any of them Jac: but she loves me Jac: more than she ever did Ty, I fucking know it Amelia: not like that, like Is loved us Jac: I can't stand it Amelia: I know Jac: you know I am sorry Jac: don't you Amelia: yeah Jac: you just had come so far and had done so much work Jac: it wasn't fair Jac: what I did wasn't, but it wouldn't have been to act on it, when I wanted so badly to be straight, for everything I did tell you to be true Amelia: no, I was in exactly the same place that we left each other in Amelia: you're not the only one who can lie Jac: I'm just so sorry but that's worth fuck all Jac: I hate how stupid all of it seems now Jac: redundant Jac: but that's close to a fair punishment, I suppose Amelia: you've already been punished Amelia: and sorry always means something when it's a real one Jac: I feel Jac: I don't Jac: I'm broken Jac: I don't even want to be a person now Amelia: I don't want to find that relatable Amelia: but it is Jac: fuck's sake Jac: see, why would I choose this? Jac: even if they're weird, this never happens to straight people Amelia: of course it does Amelia: Savannah's parents are fucked Jac: just because they don't love each other no more Jac: when they got together, I'm sure they both knew Amelia: still, her mum's so broken she's barely a person Jac: all I'm saying is we're getting dangerously close to comparing being gay to a mental illness Jac: which is what homophobes say and I'm not trying to be the confirmation Amelia: it's not being gay, it's loving the wrong person Amelia: there are happy gays, I've met some Amelia: and your brother isn't being held back by it Jac: don't get me started Amelia: Jude's love life is messier than his Amelia: more dramatic Jac: he'll end up with a girl Amelia: you don't know that Jac: wait and see Amelia: yeah, I'll stalk him from afar like a fangirl Amelia: 🤢 Jac: it's not the same either Amelia: you love a competition Jac: yeah, this is so much fun Jac: him and Jude are the same Jac: it doesn't mean anything to them, so they aren't getting hurt Jac: they don't care, it's not serious Amelia: you've got me, we're very much the same Amelia: in this anyway Jac: I don't want to love anyone ever again Amelia: then don't Jac: that's why I have no friends Amelia: yeah well you don't need them, that's the line and the lie, right? Jac: it's not funny Jac: I can't be trusted Jac: with any kind of relationship with a girl Amelia: I'm not laughing because me either Amelia: I make bad choices and I'm proven stupid, remember Jac: it's so fucking isolating Amelia: school is anyway Amelia: we're all in boxes Jac: you never used to hate it this much Amelia: now you understand how much I hate everything Amelia: how exhausted I am Amelia: it'd be nice to have the solidarity if it wasn't so horrible Jac: I'm just trying to get used to it Jac: accept it Amelia: at least you don't have to see her every day Amelia: maybe that'll make it different Jac: I never get to see her again Amelia: you don't know that either Jac: I do Jac: she's unlikely to stop by when she's seeing her mum Amelia: you verbally recoiled from me, ruined my birthday, nobody would call it likely that we're talking Jac: naive optimism is exactly what got you here Jac: don't even need to scroll for the reminder Amelia: ouch Amelia: you always find new ways to hurt me Jac: you really did just say you made bad choices and were stupid Jac: continuing this conversation is just another one for the list, probably Amelia: I can say it and do so you don't need to Jac: alright, alright Amelia: you're blocked though, this is the only place you could try to Jac: I could make another post but the point has been made well enough I reckon Amelia: it's not my birthday now so there's no point Amelia: ⛅ Jac: sod you then Jac: don't want you getting the wrong impression Amelia: 😂 bit late for that Jac: yeah Amelia: my dad'll be up soon I'll just wait ☕ Amelia: don't need you to entertain me any further Jac: you gonna tell him about your shit birthday Amelia: I'll tell them both we broke up and they'll be thrilled Amelia: it's all they want to hear Jac: you can tell them it was my fault, it doesn't matter to me Amelia: why would I do that? Jac: dunno, but having someone else's parents take over and shout at me for a bit might be mildly entertaining Amelia: they think I'm over you, they want me to be better Amelia: I'm not going to ruin the lie Jac: rude Jac: but fine Jac: guess you don't owe me Amelia: no, I don't Jac: enjoy your coffee then Amelia: it'll taste disgusting like it always does Amelia: the biggest lie of all Jac: you aren't as exhausted and sad as you say you are Jac: the taste would've been acquired by now, you massive child Amelia: I've had to hide it longer than you Amelia: I'm just more skilled and hilarious Jac: so you're better at being sad? Jac: and I love a competition 🙄 Amelia: 😏 Amelia: I've acquired a taste for anything with a high enough alcohol content, there you go Jac: I was drunk before I got there and that was still apparent Amelia: haven't needed stitches yet Jac: that's something Jac: anyway, how'd you figure you've had to hide it longer? Amelia: because I have Amelia: you were sitting pretty on a ☁ with Savannah for ages Amelia: nothing could touch you up there Jac: that's where you're wrong Amelia: I'm not letting you win again Jac: 😏 Jac: it's not like I was fucking boys because I thought I wanted to Amelia: okay 🏆 no need to make me cry thinking about that Jac: they aren't that bad Jac: well, usually Jac: just not as interesting, it didn't make sense Jac: why we would waste time we could be together instead Amelia: it's really sad Amelia: as 💔 it was seeing you with lads, I thought it was at least what you wanted Jac: they aren't the ones that made me 💔 Amelia: I know but Amelia: I can't imagine doing that, or how it would make me feel if I thought I had to Jac: well you're much softer than I am Amelia: excuse me, it took you years to break me, Savannah did the same to you in 1 Amelia: you're not that hard Jac: I think that says more about Savannah than it does you Jac: but alright Amelia: right, because she's so perfect Amelia: I actually can't compete Jac: shut up Amelia: it's true Jac: it isn't that simple, I keep saying Amelia: it's as simple as you've already said, she's straight and I'm not Amelia: it was safer for you, except it wasn't Jac: you make it sound Jac: ugh Amelia: isn't it? Jac: you think I'm a right cold, calculating bitch Jac: and I'm not saying you're wrong but it was nice when you thought otherwise Amelia: we can't go back, you really drilled that into me Jac: I know Jac: oh well Amelia: oh well? that's the best you can do, yeah? Amelia: doesn't sound very calculating and well planned out Jac: because it's all over Jac: the only thing I've got left is uni and the career I want Jac: nothing else can or is going to exist Amelia: that's more than I've got Amelia: I haven't exactly been concentrating on my app Jac: well you're going to run away and find your Thelma aren't you Amelia: you ruined that fantasy with reality Jac: yeah right Jac: you're still a hopeless romantic Amelia: with a 🚗 I can't drive yet Jac: have you had any lessons yet Amelia: no Amelia: I keep asking my dad but he's always too busy Jac: go ask him now Amelia: I've drank too much to go now Jac: well duh but he'll feel so bad for you he'll make time tomorrow or whatever Amelia: and we're back to calculating Jac: someone has to if you wanna be wild and free Amelia: 😂 Jac: how early is it Jac: will the library be open Amelia: it's weird that the library is still open at any hour Amelia: you're literally the only person who ever goes there Jac: excuse me, only child Jac: you try and study with a house full of annoying kids and dogs Amelia: I'm fine with a 🏠 swap, I don't feel like studying Jac: yeah only if you make it permanent Amelia: you wouldn't take my guest room for a night, I don't think I'd be able to make that happen Jac: because you were there Amelia: rude Jac: sensible Amelia: nothing's going to happen Jac: yeah exactly Amelia: what does that mean? Jac: it means we aren't going to be friends Amelia: why not? Jac: I told you why Amelia: I'm not asking you to care about me, I'm saying I'm here for you Jac: No Jac: I wasn't joking when I said I can't have friends Amelia: I know you weren't Jac: that includes you Jac: especially you Amelia: okay Jac: okay Amelia: good morning then Jac: 👋

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Amelia

Jac: Can you believe this girl? Amelia: No, you're right, she's unbelievable! Jac: I can't believe she thinks so much of herself Jac: who told her she was so great and was it April fools when they lied to her face? Amelia: it'll be sir from now on and she'll be loving it Jac: As if she didn't get it just because she's so loud and he couldn't bother with the tantrum Amelia: he had no idea what to do when Ciara started crying, we all saw that Jac: Exactly, she just made him feel uncomfortable Jac: not cool Amelia: it's really not Jac: Not to mention not cool in the literal sense Jac: so lame Amelia: yeah Amelia: did you see how Connor and his friends looked at her? Amelia: I'm 😳 for her Jac: She has no shame Jac: It's no wonder Keeley doesn't want to be her friend any more Jac: I heard she like, ruined her last birthday party Jac: not surprised Amelia: showing off at the ice rink does sound like something she'd do Jac: Probably 😭 she wasn't the next Michelle Kwan Jac: she thinks she's good at EVERYTHING, which is cringe when you can't back that up Amelia: and when you put that much effort in, to impress sir of all people Amelia: he's not someone she should have a crush on Jac: Talk about daddy issues Amelia: my parents know everyone, they probably know hers Jac: OMG, I wonder what they're like Jac: she has a sister too, right? Jac: but she doesn't seem as nightmareish Amelia: I think she's in the year below but I've never heard anything about her Amelia: she must not be so Savannah-ish Jac: Poor thing is probably suffocated Jac: have to be so extra to get any attention with a sister like that Amelia: thank god I've never been to any family dinners at her house Amelia: who is she friends with now? Jac: You'll have to corner your mum, find out what their deal is Jac: I think she goes 'round with that Molly girl and her friends Jac: but I don't think they're like HER friends, you knoq Amelia: come over tonight, I've already sent her a text and it's totally fine Jac: Cool, I can sleep? Jac: anything to get away from my own annoying sister for the night Amelia: absolutely! Amelia: hopefully she'll have less boring gossip than when I asked her about that new girl last year Jac: Yay 😚 Jac: I'm sure she can be relied upon for the tea Jac: if not we'll look up their tragic old people socials Amelia: being on the board of school governors is such a middle aged in Amelia: that'll be where she knows Savannah's parents from if they are anything like her Jac: Why else would you do it? Jac: There's no funding to allocate 😂 Amelia: 😂 Jac: Though, your mum has to tell us in advanced for the next fundraiser, so we can actually get in there before Savannah just takes it all over Amelia: if people would pay her to 🤫🤐 that'd be a charitable act to us Jac: That's SUCH a good idea though actually Jac: watch her flop a sponsored silence 😂 Amelia: her sister would be 💔 Amelia: thinking it's her moment Jac: Awh 😬🤭 Amelia: oh god, I'm too stupid, I did not click her last name Amelia: her dad is a self proclaimed big deal, it all makes sense now Jac: Gross 😫 Jac: links? Amelia: they're like 🤑 Amelia: [links] Jac: She does have such wannabe richgirl vibes Jac: and she looks like him Amelia: she does 😬🤭 Jac: awkward Jac: also that there's barely any sign of her mum on these socials... Amelia: I wonder if he's flirted with my mum Amelia: she won't tell us Jac: but we'll know from what she DOESN'T say 😏 Amelia: this afternoon is going to drag so hard Jac: What even is social skills Jac: such a non-class, so dull 🙄 Jac: we should go to the shops before going to yours though, get snacks Jac: AND if we get dinner your mum will be thrilled with us 😇 Amelia: 💐! Amelia: you're onto something Amelia: do you think I should tint my lashes? Jac: I know 😋 Jac: Are you serious? but your hair is SO dark Amelia: exactly, they should be naturally thicker than this Jac: Okay but make sure you get a good kit Jac: Poppy Masters in the year above us got a cheap one and they all fell out Jac: her eyebrows too 😱 Amelia: oh no Jac: She's too ginger anyway, it would have looked ridiculous if it went right Amelia: is she the one who usually looks orange? Jac: Yeah...it's unfortunate 😬 Jac: she's not allowed to dye her hair because her mam reckons she'll regret spoiling her 'natural beauty' Amelia: her mum gets botox though Jac: Seriously? Jac: I thought she was a young mum too, like you know, had her TOO young young Jac: what a state Amelia: she thought my mum got it too and was asking her where and everything Amelia: because wherever she went cut her off for wanting to keep going like all the time Jac: The cheek of some people Jac: that's like Savannah levels of no shame Jac: your mum must've been SO embarrassed for her Amelia: I was standing right there and then she gave me a talk about our natural beauty, since I owe it to her, sorry dad Jac: Well you are super beautiful 🤷 Amelia: but yours was a model and you look just like her, neither of you are in people's faces about it Amelia: 😳 stop it please mother Amelia: I don't wanna turn into Savannah Jac: You could NEVER Amelia: have you seen her socials? She really loves herself Jac: I'll go look now Jac: I bet it's all selfies though Amelia: EVERYTHING she wears is designer Amelia: we get it 🤑💸 Jac: 🙄 like way to show you have no friends or real hobbies Amelia: does she do anything but shop and study? Amelia: 🥱 Jac: Clearly not Jac: She can't be that rich or she wouldn't go to our school Jac: or live in the catchment area even Amelia: maybe her invisible mum is trying to make her more humble Amelia: she goes on holiday constantly if this feed is anything to go by Jac: we might have to help her with that goal, honestly Amelia: what are you 🤔? Jac: Well, she needs teaching when to be quiet and when to just stop Jac: so we need to find something that she wouldn't wanna overshare Amelia: but now she's sir's favourite, aren't you worried we'd end up in trouble? Jac: it can't come from us, of course Jac: it won't be hard to just get out there Jac: anyway, how long is he actually going to be able to deal with how much she is Amelia: if you tell Is anything she'll spread it around Jac: and she never remembers where she heard it Jac: maybe we can think of something that will stop her being favourite Jac: hmm Amelia: like she's 😍🥰😘 for him Amelia: if he can't handle tears Jac: I mean, it isn't even a stretch Jac: we all saw her so Amelia: and the daddy issues are real Jac: Exactly Jac: like, it's not Sir's fault your dad is the worst Jac: do you wanna facetime her later? Amelia: should we? Jac: Is, I mean, obvs 😅 Jac: she might be a bit jealous she wasn't invited but she'll still be happy we called her Amelia: what if she wants to come over though? Jac: we'll have to pretend we've got somewhere to be after Jac: so she doesn't go on and on Jac: some club, a reservation with your parents 🤷 Jac: it'll be better to tell her, I'm not messaging it, I only trust you like that Jac: she could turn on us and say we were gossiping or whatever, some pettiness Amelia: I do wanna take you somewhere cool since my dad's working late Jac: That sounds fun Jac: do you have somewhere in mind already? is it a surprise? 😋 Amelia: it doesn't have to be a surprise but yeah, my cousin gave me the idea, so I know you'll like it Amelia: the one you met at my parents anniversary party Jac: I like surprises Jac: it sounds intriguing Jac: Isabelle is definitely not coming Amelia: follow my lead with my mum, okay? Amelia: she'd only say no if she knew where we were actually going Jac: Of course Jac: I know how to play it Amelia: I trust you Jac: ❤❤❤ Amelia: if Is feels left out she can come with us when we go to Savannah's 🏠 Amelia: I've worked out where it is Amelia: she seriously does overshare on socials Jac: As if Jac: you're as smart as she is dumb, seriously Jac: probably wants people to show up, so she can show off some more Amelia: yeah Amelia: Is wouldn't spy as subtly as us, maybe I'll uninvite her Amelia: before she like falls into their recycling bins Jac: 😂😂 Jac: Bless her Jac: she had a bit of salad stuck in her teeth ALL afternoon yesterday lunch Jac: it's like she never looks in a mirror sometimes Amelia: I can't believe Declan asked her out! Amelia: nobody's ever asked me Jac: I just hope for her sake she hasn't got a reputation with the boys already or he'll be expecting something Jac: loads of them fancy you though Jac: like Luke H Amelia: he cares more about French verbs than French kissing and he knows I'll let him copy a few of my answers Amelia: which is fine because unlike Isabelle I don't know how to 💋 Jac: It isn't hard Jac: can't be if she can master it, no offence Jac: and boys LOVE a teaching moment don't they 🙄🙄 Jac: don't want a girl who's clearly done it too many times already Amelia: that isn't a rep I want Amelia: so for now, maybe it's a good thing I freeze up around boys Jac: You're so cute Jac: the boys our age are so immature anyway, there is NO point Amelia: yeah, it's no wonder I can't think of any of them that I'd let 💋 me Jac: What about Leo? Jac: everyone fancies him Amelia: and he knows it Amelia: just like Savannah Jac: Yeah Jac: do you think she's even that pretty? Amelia: she is, but I think you're so much prettier Jac: you're just saying that 'cos you're my best friend Jac: but I appreciate it anyway 😚 Amelia: I could be her best friend instead but I'm not Jac: Imagine Jac: glorified bag holder sounds more legit Amelia: she'd hate where I'm taking you tonight Amelia: not enough mirrors and selfie lighting Jac: 😏 Jac: dark corners and 🚫📸 is way more fun Jac: that's why we're friends Amelia: best friends Jac: forever Amelia: and ever Amelia: do you wanna skip social skills? Jac: didn't you like, JUST get out of detention with Hilary? 🤔😆 Amelia: yeah Amelia: the timing's right Jac: to book yourself back in? Jac: I do HATE that lesson Amelia: we can say you're ill if you're worried about joining me in detention Amelia: Savannah's display was sickening Amelia: and you're 😇 enough to get away with it Jac: I hate that I can't escape her Jac: you know she's in EVERY one of my classes, literally Amelia: whenever you want to, we'll just go Jac: I will need to get an outfit Jac: as you're taking me somewhere Jac: I was going to ask to borrow your new top but this way, we can go shopping somewhere more exciting than just tescos for the dinner Amelia: my new top would look better on you but there'll be other dark corners for you to wear it in Jac: Not even, you looked so good in it on Friday Amelia: 😳 Amelia: I did feel good on Friday, we should do that again Jac: Definitely Jac: Where do you think Declan is gonna take Is out? Amelia: his sister works at the bowling alley, doesn't she? He'll use her discount Jac: the shoes are SUCH a look 🤭 Jac: guess she can't get burger and chips stuck in between her teeth though so that's a plus Jac: romantic ❤ Amelia: annoyingly, because I'm quite good at 🎳 Jac: Who's he friends with, you could make it a double date Jac: if you beat her though she'd be so mad 😠 she's the sporty one !!! Amelia: I'm not going unless you do too, who would you want? Amelia: Ross maybe Jac: He's not too annoying Amelia: did he get with that foreign exchange girl? Jac: He SAYS he did Jac: but I don't know if that's actually confirmed Amelia: still, I don't love that for you Jac: Hayden is part of that group too but he takes Classics and he's like, the male equivalent of Savannah Jac: he does not shut up, even though he's usually wrong 😒 Amelia: 🎤 drop Amelia: even if it makes me a bad friend, I'm not invested in Is' love life Amelia: there's a million things more fun than 🎳 we could be doing Jac: Yeah, it's not remotely worth it just to spy on her Jac: she'll tell us EVERY detail anyway 💁 Amelia: 😬 Amelia: I hate hearing about her boy drama Jac: maybe we'd care if there was more to it Jac: or she didn't always make herself look like a total idiot for some boring boy with nothing going for him Amelia: maybe Jac: or maybe not 😉 Amelia: I love her but I can't help feeling I loved her more when she wasn't so boy obsessed Amelia: but don't tell her I said that Jac: Of course I won't Jac: I know exactly what you mean Jac: it's like nothing else matters to her anymore Jac: she'll get over it though 🤞 Amelia: if she doesn't, I'm not going to have anything to ever talk to her about because it's the only thing she wants to Amelia: but that's probably true of most girls in our class anyway Jac: It's so tragic Jac: do you not have any ambitions of your own Jac: like it isn't the 50s Jac: not to mention boys think that's like, deeply unattractive anyway Amelia: at least you don't think I'm weird Amelia: or the tragic one Amelia: do you think the boys are obsessed with what we're doing? Jac: You're the coolest girl I know Jac: I'd be your friend no matter what Jac: like sometimes, I think I'm only friends with Is because I always have been Jac: like, I love her but Jac: what do we have in common now Jac: and no, boys fascination with girls starts and ends in the one place Amelia: I will be your friend no matter what Amelia: and if Savannah Moore or anyone else gets in your face like that again, I will be back in detention Amelia: would I risk it all for Is in the same way, not right now, no Jac: I'm glad I've got you on my side, Meels Jac: even if she's got Sir Jac: not for long, right Amelia: if she keeps this up she won't have anything Jac: 💪😍 Amelia: ❤❤❤ Jac: Okay, where do you wanna meet? Jac: I'm fake en-route to the sickbay now Amelia: [a location that makes sense] Jac: IOU a coffee Amelia: I should be treating you after everything that's happened today Amelia: you put in loads more work than she did Amelia: sir only recognises her big mouth Jac: But you've been so helpful and lovely, a per Jac: he's always been like that Jac: it's not my fault I don't like to shout out all the answers all the time Amelia: he didn't know you when you were younger and so shy Amelia: but I remember Jac: Clearly it'd be better if I was a loudmouth and said everything that came into my head though Amelia: for that lesson, but you don't have to go any more Amelia: we're only going to the ones we can be bothered to Jac: Sounds like a good idea but my grades would disagree Amelia: when Nessa was being bullied she didn't have to go to like any lessons Jac: Well I'm not being bullied though Jac: and I don't want her thinking I'm like, threatened by her Amelia: sir is close to the line, you don't have to mention her Jac: no, let's deal with it how we said first Jac: just her not being as smug will be enough Amelia: okay Jac: Trust me Jac: and you can still ditch as much as you want Jac: not gonna get in trouble with me Amelia: I'll ditch the lessons you're not in Amelia: I don't trust her and I'm not going to just leave you with her Jac: You're like half-girl half-pitbull Jac: not art though, you love art Amelia: maybe your mum and dad will adopt me and we can share a room instead of you having to deal with Jude Amelia: well then can I 🎨🖌 you? I've pushed this deadline extension as far as it'll go Jac: Ugh, don't even, that'd be the best Jac: she actually drives me insane sometimes Jac: you wanna 🎨🖌 me? Amelia: I'm thrilled my parents didn't make any 🧫🧪 siblings for me Amelia: and IVF is 💸💸 Amelia: yeah? if you'll let me Jac: You're so lucky tbh Jac: alright, but if I have to pose you can't make me laugh Amelia: 😏 Jac: You'll be the one that ends up with a dodgy painting if you do 😅 Amelia: if I asked Is to let me paint her with 🥑🥦🥬🥒 in her teeth then maybe Amelia: you're too good of a subject to mess up Jac: be so avant-garde Jac: the teacher would probably like that more Amelia: I don't care what she likes Amelia: not a teacher's pet like Savannah is Jac: you're only 🐶 part time Jac: and for a worthy cause, got it Amelia: for you, exactly yeah Amelia: 🦺🐶 Jac: what would I do without you? Amelia: you'd have less paint in your hair Amelia: 😂 Jac: Not very natural of me Jac: but I think I suit it Amelia: I think you do too Jac: I'm [different location] that nosy secretary was doing the rounds and I had to change direction Amelia: I'll be right there 🏃 Amelia: but let Is think she's the sporty one Jac: 🤐 Jac: be bit rude of you to take artistic and sporty Amelia: no way, you're good at everything Jac: but you don't think I'm unbearable like Savannah? Amelia: NEVER Jac: Good Amelia: she's pretending to know what she's doing anyway Amelia: all mouth and no talent Jac: You reckon? Jac: Probably Jac: if you're that showy, you're making up for something, anyway Amelia: even if I'm being unfair I guarantee she's not on your level Amelia: nobody is Jac: You're too nice to me Amelia: too nice like 🤫😳 or you don't think it's true? Jac: A bit of both, I suppose Jac: I do work hard but I don't need to shove that in everyone's face Amelia: you're the anti-Savannah Jac: getting into the uni I want is reward enough Jac: besides, not as if it's endearing to be a total know-it-all-show-off Jac: you don't have to dumb yourself down to be chill about it, you know Amelia: yeah, I'm chill about it, but still smart enough to follow everything she was saying Jac: Exactly Jac: all mouth no talent is not the lasting impression I wanna leave Amelia: me either Jac: not that I care what anyone here thinks Amelia: I know you don't think that about me so same Jac: I only think the best things about you, of course Amelia: you love me even though I don't have a uni picked out and I love you even though you do Jac: That's a pretty good summary, yeah Amelia: 🤓❤😎 Jac: I don't think I'd go that far 😏 Amelia: 😂 Jac: if I was such a 🤓 I wouldn't be waiting for you right now Amelia: maybe I'm that 😎 and persuasive Jac: really Jac: 👌 Amelia: you don't look like that in your glasses though, if we're being real Jac: Good to know Jac: don't need to have a makeover Amelia: I look like this 👧🏻 Amelia: I can't come for you or at you with a makeover Jac: Listen to your mother Amelia: NEVER Jac: okay, okay 😎 Amelia: [probably should actually show up gal so we can leave this here]

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: what's the name of that boy we were partnered with first day Janis: the one when we won? Grace: Craig Grace: why? Janis: that's it Janis: what's his deal, how do you know him? Grace: I literally don't Janis: you don't fuck with him? Grace: idk he's like really shy or whatever Grace: that was the first time I'd ever talked to him & vice versa so Janis: okay, well Mia banged him last night Janis: we saw her going in his room Grace: EW Grace: poor Craig Janis: yeah Janis: where is he Janis: she eat him afterwards, like 🕷 Grace: 🐍 like Grace: ugh he was cute Grace: RIP 🙏 Janis: anyway, thought I'd say 'cos obviously did it to 💔 you so naturally act the opposite to piss her off Janis: we got 📸s Grace: 🙄 duh I am the opposite, he hit me up & I said no thanks, I have the 🗨 Janis: ha Janis: send me that Grace: [does] Janis: 👍 Janis: always handy to have Grace: yeah Janis: not ready yet but can preview it when I'm done Grace: not sure I wanna 👀🍿 her snatching that sweet boy's virginity but thanks Janis: she weren't that careless Janis: thankfully Janis: you'll 👀 Grace: 👌👌 Janis: How's Els? Grace: UM why? What did you do? Janis: Nothing Janis: she fell on her arse, did she not Grace: Oh that Grace: it was no worse than when Asia dropped your bf Grace: how's your ankle? Janis: If I didn't know how thick she was, assume Mia put her up to it Janis: it's annoying Janis: need it to be better for when we get back Grace: literally so many 🐕🐩 to walk, what would you even do? Janis: exactly, can make loads in holidays, those 7 hours free really add up Grace: I'd offer to help but so can I 👶🍼 Janis: I'll survive Janis: take one of Billie's old chairs if necessary, get them to pull me along Grace: 😂😂 Grace: ask Mia what shifts barista boy is down for, maybe he can help Janis: in theory worth it Janis: but she'd probably be weirdly smug about her knowing instead of me Grace: true, just ask him Grace: 🤞💜 Janis: ain't sharing my pay Grace: he'd totally do it for free cos he's SO 😍😍😍 Janis: yeah yeah Janis: that'd fade well fast when faced with 6am and dog shit Grace: Hello?! He gets up earlier than that to serve ☕ and clean bathrooms Janis: we've all got very glamorous lives Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: HIGHKEY should tell Craig to get tested but like I don't want him to think I'm 💔 Grace: ugh Janis: slip a 📝 under his door Janis: - a concerned citizen Grace: so retro Grace: love it Grace: idk if I even have any paper?? Janis: we have to do some exit survey bullshit don't we Grace: do we? Grace: EW Janis: mhmm, already planning my constructive criticism, obvs Grace: @ Mr Lucas what are you even doing here?! SO GROSS Janis: pretty sure he's following me Janis: fair, did cut the two spare ties he brought (??) in half Grace: OMG! you've literally saved someone's life tbh Grace: he's that creepy Janis: reckons we've got full term detention when we get back Janis: so sorry I foiled your plan, definitely wanna spend more alone time with you, sounds good Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: so sorry you're short & gross & single & mad about it, hun Janis: if mum actually makes me go, it'll be my 🩸 on his 🧤 and her 🤲 Grace: she won't even Grace: not for that long Janis: 🤞 Janis: if all he cares about are the holes in all his 🩲 and not finding out what else I did, then she won't be as pissed off as she could be Grace: what else did you do?? Grace: also EW for that visual, babes Janis: 🤫 Janis: you didn't have to touch 'em Grace: you've literally made it even easier for him to touch himself, excuse you Janis: 😂😂 Janis: 📸 that for the online burn book Grace: can he get enough hate to retire please?! so over what a freak he is Janis: ain't we all Grace: maybe he won't be able to take us for any more activities thanks to the wardrobe malfunctions you caused 🤞🤞 Grace: 🙏 Janis: could be his day CANCELLED 👌🍆💦🥴 Grace: STOP Grace: I don't wanna see 🍆💦 applied to him EVER Janis: it'll stop him being so 🤬🤬 on the bus Grace: the breakfasts here are literally gross enough the 1st time around, can you not make it come back up!! Janis: yeah, pretty rough Janis: that'll be why the gals have been skipping, yeah 😏 Grace: 🙄 Grace: Don't even, she wants me to Grace: I don't have the energy to fight with her about it even after eating, sorry not sorry, babes Janis: no wonder she's taken to spreading STIs Janis: wanna take out as many people as she can, that one Grace: idk what goes through her head, 1st barista boy, now Craig Grace: thank god if I was actually 😍 she'd clearly have no idea Janis: he's not the worst looking Grace: barista boy? DUH Grace: we all see your 😍😍😍 hun Janis: I meant Craig and you know it Grace: like I said, he was cute Janis: shame he's now 50% likely to have the clap Grace: I'll write him that note, it's been forever since I did a good deed Grace: 🙏😇 Janis: nan be 💃 Grace: maybe now she'll love me 🤞🖤 Janis: she loves no one but dad and the LORD Janis: allegedly on that last one Grace: as far as she's concerned they were basically the same person so Janis: where was his dad, tbh Janis: maybe he was 1/3 Janis: 2/3 now Janis: 👶🏾👻 Grace: 🤷 Janis: she'll ask the lady at church who can talk to spirits, that's what she was on about to mum last I heard Janis: gonna stay in touch now he's dead, clearly Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Grace: I won't be taking Craig to 🙏 his STI away then Janis: cute date idea Grace: IKR?! Grace: so tragic that we'll both have to miss out Janis: 💔 be a trip to the clinic with Mia instead Grace: more like a solo trip Grace: she's already forgotten that boy Janis: poor, poor David Janis: what fond memories is he gonna have looking back Grace: 🐍🐁 Grace: but that's a v relatable mood, this trip has been the WORST Janis: has it? Grace: not for you, obvs Janis: just remembering that one where you pissed yourself and then cried the whole time Janis: it's at least one up on that Grace: EXCUSE YOU Grace: literally don't bring up that you've ever known me, thanks so much Janis: there's no selling that storyline, sadly Grace: there so is Janis: the name's a dead giveaway Grace: & it still wouldn't be the wildest rumour ever spread Janis: reality is boring in comparison to what they can cook up Grace: duh Janis: go ahead and have a go then Grace: 🤷🤷 there's enough rumours about you & your bf rn Grace: it'd get swallowed faster than poor Craig 💔 Janis: what's the best one you heard then Grace: they're literally all so cringe Janis: go on Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: no thanks Janis: 🎈🎉💩 Grace: it's bad enough I have to 👀 you IRL I'm not trying to gossip in 🗨 too Grace: try Mia or El Grace: they can't get over your 💖 life Janis: 'course they can't Janis: 💔💔 real devastated Grace: mhmm Janis: Ella should be buzzing Janis: but seeing Mia 😢 makes her 😭 Grace: she's too 💔 her fake injury didn't work & yours is real Janis: she can have it Janis: fucking stupid Janis: if this trip weren't a waste of time before Grace: you should totally forget about doing whatever if you wanna get better for hols Janis: doing what? Janis: it's not like we've done anything that taxing Grace: sure but anyway Janis: I can't spend any more time doing nothing Grace: like you said, we already are Janis: you know what I mean Grace: yeah Janis: maybe we'll go do something else Janis: idk Grace: you've got like the perfect excuse not to be under Mr Lucas' 👀 so Janis: I do, might make him join in though Janis: 'cos he hates us Janis: and then I just get bored Grace: OMG stop giving me gross visuals Janis: ?? Grace: anything involving him is like traumatising Grace: he needs to stay on the side lines, thank you Janis: bit harsh Janis: he's northern, not a monster Grace: 😂 but not even Janis: 😏 Grace: whatever Grace: it'll be over soon Janis: the trip? Janis: well observed Grace: duh not gonna kms over breakfast Janis: thought you meant my 💘 Grace: Mia wishes Grace: everyone else will obvs be 💔 Janis: give 'em a good thing Grace: they have so many #s and there'll be more when you dump him Grace: it'll keep everyone busy no matter how many boys she 🐍 and obvs me the freedom to 😢 and wet myself on this trip too so Grace: love that Grace: thanks, babes Grace: 🙌💜🙌 Janis: sounds like a wild time Janis: you are welcome Grace: sure Janis: enjoy your watersports, like Grace: 👌👌

[punkscowardschampions]

Grace & Ava

Grace: you okay babes???! Ava: The furthest from without actually being 💀 Grace: Oh my god what even?! aren't you at that uni thing? Ava: For a few more hours yet, give me strength Ava: Last night was Ava: nah Grace: last night was a sorority girl horror 📽🎞 or like ??? Ava: Allegedly a thing but I've yet to see anyone rocking a skinhead without it being a Choice™ Ava: So, everyone else did go to the 📽🎞 last night but I pulled a sickie 'cos Ava: well, that can do one as a concept but also Ava: Are you sure you even want this? It's a whole saga, like 🙄😫 Grace: duh x 10000 Grace: there's nothing anyone can tell me about mean girls 🔪💔 we can skip 📽🎞 when I've IRL lived it Grace: & obvs! talk to me I'm BEYOND concerned Ava: There are no mean girls Ava: and I think the shit I pulled is beyond a Regina level even Grace: UM no way are you casting yourself 👑 thanks! what happened?! Ava: Sorry but you can try and come for the 👑 after I tell you Ava: So they get current pupils to show you around, do the tour, answer questions, do the whole programme with you, right? Ava: Must be good extra credit or whatever, anyway Ava: There's this guy, and the whole time there's this total...vibe, you know? And I'm not delusional or sad like that, its an actual thing but I know him, know of him Ava: so I know why I should just ignore it, but instead when everyone is out, I DM him Grace: excuse you bitch I'm literally reformed but like putting that ASIDE cos this is so much more IMPORTANT!😱😱 Grace: so are we talking a phoneful of regret or IRL walk of shame? Ava: We talked for a while, so I have literal evidence it wasn't just one-sided but truly do not wanna be that girl but like, I swear Ava: anyway, we did go out, properly and it was Ava: so good Ava: but then he had to go and now I have to die Grace: duh it was 😍😍😍 I know what a vibe means Grace: he has a gf yeah? honey we've ALL done it don't even stress he's obvs not that into her Ava: No its Ava: more complex Ava: there's Ava: well, he's married Ava: but he's not as old as that makes him sound but yeah, clearly quite into her Grace: Ew! What's with everyone getting 💍👰 Grace: if Janis gets proposed to I'm kmsing Grace: it doesn't sound that complex though babes, don't let this family fool you, 💔💍 is such a thing™ Ava: Can't see it myself Ava: they are cute though Ava: of course but I'm not out here doing that myself, that's Buster's bread and butter, not mine Ava: they have kids as well, two Grace: 🙄🤢 Grace: totally but we literally NEVER have to tell her or them that shh Grace: well that explains it 🤰👰💍 he probs doesn't even love her Ava: My lips are sealed Ava: One of them is like...6 or something and the other is a baby so there's like no excuse Ava: It didn't come to anything more than a kiss but I'm mortified Grace: 6? How old is he?! Ava: Again, not as old as that makes him sound Ava: 22 ish, in his last year Grace: THANK GOD! I was literally picturing like a hot 40 Ava: Somehow that would be less complicated Ava: Unless he was a friend of my parents or something but not trying to hit every cliche before I even start Uni Grace: UGH! remember when I went to the fair with that lad who turned out to be 19 & everyone lost it like I was being groomed 🙄 Grace: such a drama Grace: this seriously doesn't sound that bad Grace: either he's bored of her or having his 🍰 & 😋 Grace: who stopped it at 😘😘? Ava: Well, he did turn out to be a creep didn't he Ava: but he could've been a 15 year old creep as easily, I see your point Ava: He did Ava: his phone kept going off Ava: it must've been her Grace: yeah & like I totally worked it out for myself from reading the vibe Grace: same as you last night Grace: 😱😱😱 Grace: did he answer? did you literally have to sit there 🤐!!! Ava: I think I might've got the vibe seriously wrong Ava: well, no Ava: I don't know Ava: we were in a club, he couldn't Ava: but we left real quick and he hasn't looked at me today so that's been fun Grace: oh girl please Grace: trust, as someone who has gotten the vibe wrong WAY more times than we need to admit outside of this convo, you so didn't Grace: he's having a freakout, we've ALL been there too, yeah? Ava: Clearly Ava: 😂 Ava: Oh God Ava: I just need to pretend this never happened and peace Grace: come over Grace: we'll go out & make some new drama happen Grace: soon as you do, you'll know if he's bothered Ava: Sounds good Ava: If I didn't have two other Unis to hit before Summer officially starts 🙄 Grace: OMG you're so extra Ava: Rude 😂 Ava: Not as if I can go here now, is it? Ava: I'm burning through options, girl Grace: ILY for it 💜 Grace: did you wanna go there for real? Ava: Not hugely Ava: it was in my top 5 but its definitely not 🥇 Grace: 🤷💅 Grace: it was obvs a 🏆💋 so Ava: seriously Ava: though I'm probably gonna find out that he's made time for every girl on this program Grace: did you pick up on any other vibes? Ava: I don't think so Ava: He did say other girls were flirting with him though Grace: 😂 boys always say that Grace: literally will have been hitting refresh waiting on you 💬 Ava: Or, they really were and that was a subtle dig that I just ignored Ava: 🤡🤡 Grace: ugh don't Grace: nobody's looked hotter the morning after babes Grace: he'd be the 🤡 Ava: Minus the HP🗲 scar Ava: idk where that came from, which doesn't bode well for how trashed I must've been Grace: if he was as wasted maybe he doesn't remember & that's why he blanked you cos everything is Grace: 👋 been there Ava: I wish Ava: like I said, we know each other Grace: do you know his 👰? Ava: 😶 Ava: Just kill me now Grace: has he posted anything? Ava: About how much he 💕 his wife and kids? Ava: Fuck knows Grace: well yeah or idk how wasted he was Grace: anything to go on Ava: His 👰 would not approve Grace: if he doesn't have like a private snap he's no 💔 Ava: Wasn't my first question Ava: Probably does but bit late to ask now Grace: you literally could Grace: cringe but no more cringe than running into him playing happy families when you go get coffee Ava: I'm just gonna leave it Ava: Not a moment too soon Grace: 👌👌💜 Ava: When the alcohol leaves my system my head will be less 🤯 Ava: Standard Grace: his too though Grace: maybe he'll come to you Grace: 🤞 yeah or 🤞 no? Ava: I don't know what I want Ava: or feel about any of it Ava: It's better to just assume nah, a pleasant surprise is always better than disappointment Grace: mhmm Ava: Shut up Ava: I'm confused and hungover, I don't know anything 🙄😏 Grace: no shade Ava: I know Ava: This is too extra Ava: even from me, right Grace: you can wear the 👑 until I earn it back Grace: cos duh who's more extra Grace: me, this hoe Ava: 😂 I'm ready for it Grace: you gotta let me have it there's no 😘💖😍 in my 🔮 Ava: Not even a little? Grace: there was a little but it got too much Grace: too close to being like Grace: I can't Grace: I'm out Ava: I don't think it's all it's cracked up to be, honestly Grace: makes me feel like I'm cracking up Grace: no thanks Ava: Preaching to the converted today Grace: 🙌 Ava: I'll definitely come over some point this Summer though Grace: YAY Grace: I so need you Ava: I think me and the 'rents are going the first two weeks, then I'm going with my friends the last two Ava: so sometime in the middle to play with Grace: ugh if only my mum and dad were organised about anything ever Grace: god knows when or where they'll spring a hol 🙄🙄 Ava: All fun and games Ava: least you get more space these days, I guess Grace: if they're gonna be annoying I'll just bring you with 🤷 Ava: Three holidays would be a record Grace: hot older lad who?! 😂 Grace: Brazil is on another level Ava: If there's sun and sea, I'm happy Grace: you'll be sooo 😊 Ava: 😘 Grace: 💜 Ava: I did not think that would be such a rant Ava: IOU a coffee, I'll ping you the funds rn forreal Grace: As if! like I've NEVER done you that way Grace: shhh Ava: It's done Ava: Consider it a reminder we need a proper catch up when my head is less fried Grace: 👌👌 fine Ava: Don't be mad, it is essential some good happens today Grace: It's fine babes, promise Ava: Good Ava: I better try and finish this essay thing Ava: Or at least make a better start Grace: or at least get yourself a coffee & put some lipstick on Ava: Cheers, I know I look clapped 😂 Grace: shut up Grace: you do not! Ava: I wouldn't wanna chat to me either tbh Grace: Girl, stop Grace: this convo has been wild & I'm living Ava: I meant him, not you 😉 Ava: Only subjected socials to one pic, like Grace: well duh he wants to kiss you again not have a chat Grace: if you wanna talk you'll have to Grace: there's only one kind of convo lads ever start Ava: Hmm Ava: Have better luck with this essay than thinking of something worth saying Grace: what do you wanna say? Grace: like if you could just Ava: Christ Ava: firstly, what the fuck? Grace: he can't shade you for starting there Ava: Though I initiated it so, ugh Grace: he didn't have to go along with any of it Grace: his wife & kids were literally waiting at home for him so Grace: you like deserve to know if there are other girls or not Ava: What's more insane though Ava: asking around every girl on this course, or asking him Ava: There are definite drawbacks either way from where I'm sitting Grace: you said you know him, how much does he lie? Grace: asking him will be more than cringe if you can't believe a word, it'll be pointless Ava: I don't know him like that but Ava: I suppose I've heard that he's a typical lad in most regards so Grace: yeah Ava: but that's from one source so Ava: who's to say they're 100% reliable Grace: right Grace: I'll stalk the other girls, obvs am insane so Ava: No Ava: 'cos then I'll have to tell you who he is Ava: and it'll all get out of hand Grace: OMG do I know him??! Ava: How would you? Ava: 'course not Grace: then why does it matter if you tell me or not? Ava: I'll sort it myself Grace: Ava Grace: is it already out of hand? Ava: That'd depend on who you asked too Grace: I'm asking you Ava: I've got this Grace: promise Ava: 🤞 Grace: 👌

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: hey Janis: I hope you're alright, like Janis: I am and Janis: yeah Jimmy: 👍 Janis: sorry about that Janis: just Janis: family shit Jimmy: Alright Janis: it's not Jimmy: if any dickhead gets that, it's me Janis: yeah Janis: but Janis: I said I'd try Jimmy: we've both said shit Janis: I meant it though Jimmy: that'll be why you're here now then Janis: trying don't mean I'll always get it right Janis: and will you let me in when I am or Jimmy: you know where the spare 🔑 is Jimmy: and I meant when I said I weren't kicking you out Janis: would it help if I explain or don't it matter Jimmy: would it? Janis: I don't know Janis: maybe Janis: so you know it weren't nothing to do with you or Jimmy: would it help you? Janis: I care about you Jimmy: I care about you Jimmy: stalemate that Janis: It's hard Janis: but this is probably easier than in person Janis: for you too, it's Jimmy: I'll put the kettle on then Janis: you'll wanna Janis: just careful you don't scald yourself with any spittakes Jimmy: I'm not at work and Ian's not gonna comp me Jimmy: 💔🎻😭💸 Janis: no flat whites for him Janis: really like this story and all so jokes on you, sir Jimmy: all black everything for him Jimmy: that's the dress code when you're mourning not being 24 still or at whatever point his #heyday began and ended Janis: definitely several jokes to be made there but I'm not really black enough and you look good so Jimmy: there's been enough #bants Jimmy: it's obvs a mancave for lads lads lads the second you leave Janis: gutted, truly Jimmy: #relatable Janis: ugh Janis: right Janis: what have you heard about my sister, Rio Jimmy: she's fit Janis: is that it? Jimmy: yeah why? Jimmy: like I've heard she's a porn star but I didn't feel the need to do a search Janis: just so I know where to start Janis: so that's her, right Janis: but on top of that she Janis: it'll sound like a joke but it ain't so go with it Janis: married our cousin when she was like 18 Jimmy: hang on, your cousin or your mum's friend's kid who you call your auntie but ain't owt to do with you actually Janis: actual cousin Janis: as in they have the same fucking grandparents Jimmy: how did that come about? Janis: good question Janis: this family is fucked Janis: it's not like they didn't know each other growing up or anything, like they didn't know each other from any fucker Janis: it's Jimmy: I get that, the fucked families bit Janis: yeah Janis: well, that was 5 years ago and they did it basically in secret 'cos yeah, they would've been stopped Janis: hopefully Janis: but now they're deciding they need to renew it and force us all to come Janis: and grace just dropped that in a DM like that was something I knew or would be chill with Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: all round Janis: you're telling me Janis: she didn't know I didn't know apparently but still Janis: it's just so Jimmy: you're not gonna go and play happy families Jimmy: why would you Janis: exactly Janis: but they all will Janis: they always do Janis: they've got kids and that's a whole other tale too Jimmy: together? Janis: one, she has one that ain't his too Janis: surprisingly normal looking Jimmy: is it? Janis: [sends Grace's insta] Janis: boys theirs Jimmy: he don't look like a 🐙 or owt Jimmy: your sister must be fit Jimmy: rumour mill got one 🏆 Janis: they're both obsessed with themselves Janis: still think we could've diluted the DNA tbh Jimmy: 😂 Janis: alright, you can laugh Jimmy: sorry Janis: would if it weren't my family Janis: try to anyway Jimmy: she cheated on him and they're still doing another 💍👰? Janis: that's the other story Janis: she was meant to surrogate for my brother Junior Janis: who you'll have heard fuck all about 'cos he keeps to himself and everyone forgets he exists Janis: but then she didn't wanna give it up and it was stupid anyway 'cos he was fresh into uni and dating a lecturer like that situation needs a child Janis: and her life's such a roaring success she should be giving a hand Jimmy: what? Janis: I'll give you a sec Janis: it's literally the most blatant and stupid way she's wrecked a life, like Jimmy: 💔 Mia ain't told me 'cause I thought we had something 💕 Jimmy: but it's alright, I'll live Janis: who knows what Grace told her Janis: that one might actually be family only 'cos as I said, no one gives a fuck about him Janis: he stays well away now, sensible Jimmy: fucking hell, mate Janis: just the local freakshow Janis: it's neverending, the amount of shit there is like that Jimmy: I'll keep it 🤐 about Ian from now on like Jimmy: you can have 🥇 Janis: nah Janis: not a competition Jimmy: is a bit Jimmy: just 🤏 though Janis: well I don't want him feeling left out Janis: still a 🏆 for being an outright twat Jimmy: he ain't 💀💀💀 yet Jimmy: still time to #flex Janis: him and shaz can make it down the aisle 'fore them Jimmy: she ain't been back 🎻🎻 Jimmy: can't keep a mum me Janis: letdown Janis: really wanna be a bridesmaid but can't on principle Jimmy: no 😭😭😭 in my kitchen Jimmy: we're all 💔 Janis: stay strong, boy Jimmy: alright fine I'll bring my proposal forward so we can get 💍 before them Jimmy: stop begging Janis: it'd be worth pissing off the pope to piss them off harder Jimmy: 💕 taking that as a yeah Janis: go on then Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: brb stealing my dad's 💳 to buy a 💎 Janis: 😂 Jimmy: gold or silver? Janis: it's called white gold, so silver but make it expensive #weirdflex Jimmy: #goalsforever Janis: put that in the vows Jimmy: obvs Jimmy: I'm writing them rn Janis: Thanks Janis: for making me feel better Janis: 🤏 Jimmy: if I can't do that then you'd have nowt to come back for Jimmy: have to hang up my boyfriend 😎 Jimmy: put on my 💔 ones Janis: I wasn't leaving you Jimmy: for now Janis: I won't Jimmy: don't promise owt to me, you've been warned, girl Janis: it's a threat Jimmy: hot Jimmy: alright then Janis: I mean it Jimmy: you don't scare me Jimmy: 😘 me or 💀💀💀 me ain't that the phrase Janis: you can't die right now Jimmy: might do Jimmy: you're really beautiful Janis: you don't know Janis: I'm a state Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: that's fake news Janis: shh Jimmy: Alright Grace, put your sister back on Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: it's a good thing you can't see her too tbf Janis: not practical having to hide from you for life when you marry in Jimmy: wait, you're with her? Jimmy: I'll hide the body but bit of warning, babe Janis: ha Janis: yeah Janis: IOU on the rescue she wanted to cash Jimmy: if Mia's there an' all & you don't say hey from me I'll be fuming Janis: she's definitely not Jimmy: have you checked the boot? 👀🍿🔪 Jimmy: folds up like paper, her Janis: wouldn't pit it past her Janis: I'll dry my eyes and get on it Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: tell Grace she ain't having a tea unless she's 💰💰 Janis: She's taking my spare bed at nans Janis: musical faves atm Jimmy: I won't go throw shit at her window tonight then Jimmy: tah for the head's up Jimmy: soon my dear 💕👵 Janis: subtle Janis: find somewhere else to kip, it's alright, like Jimmy: no Janis: 💕 Jimmy: I mean it, don't Janis: okay Janis: if you'll have me Jimmy: I want you Janis: I love you Jimmy: do you? Janis: I said it like Jimmy: yeah but Janis: you can pretend I didn't Jimmy: we don't do that it's like the only rule Janis: if you need a free pass then take it Jimmy: I'm not saying I do Jimmy: just Jimmy: It's nowt I ain't heard before and Jimmy: for what? Janis: what do you mean? Jimmy: she said it and she still went Jimmy: my mum Janis: it's okay, it doesn't have to mean anything Janis: I already didn't promise you, yeah Jimmy: it's not Janis: no Janis: it's not Janis: but Janis: I don't know Jimmy: why couldn't she just Jimmy: why did he have to be so Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: it's bullshit Janis: and it's unfair Jimmy: you know that I Jimmy: so important you Jimmy: Alright? Janis: I know Janis: it's all good Janis: isn't it Jimmy: Yeah Janis: I'm sorry everythings shit Jimmy: not everything is Jimmy: you're Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: I like you too Janis: you're about all I do like Janis: no pressure Jimmy: is that what you wanted it to mean? Jimmy: when you said Janis: I meant Janis: that I give a shit about you and I think you're funny and nice and fit and I wanna be around you Janis: and I don't wanna fuck you over Jimmy: then I love you too Janis: yeah? Jimmy: I said what I said Janis: allright Janis: I'll come in then Jimmy: were you waiting for me to say it before you got off the doorstep or what? Janis: not exactly Jimmy: [is at the door like oh hey] Janis: [the most dramatic hug flinging yourself at him like it's been 84 years 'cos lowkey] Jimmy: [we're never letting go bitch thank god its april and not the dead of winter] Janis: [you need all the moments so deal] Jimmy: [has he ever held onto anyone this tightly, no he has not] Janis: [the casual state she is godbless] Jimmy: [when you still look more beautiful than anyone ever probably] Janis: [rude] Jimmy: [this is why Grace hates you girl but pop off] Janis: [when you say it out loud but really quiet] Jimmy: [just really snuggling into her like we're not all dying okay bye] Janis: [just saying how she's gonna stay and how scary it was and not making a whole load of sense 'cos didn't even get to that bit honey] Jimmy: [all the comforting touches ever because now isn't the moment to be like um what but we'll get to it] Janis: [too much to try and be reasonable and logical rn 'is everyone asleep?'] Jimmy: [nodding because you can't trust yourself to speak rn because if you start what are you even gonna say like] Janis: [just like yes good 'cos we don't need to be starting any more scenes do we 'this was not how I planned any of this going'] Jimmy: [especially not with Ian cos at least cali wouldn't give you a slap 'bit shit at plans, us'] Janis: [nods and does a little lol like 'understatement'] Jimmy: [just sitting on the step so you can 🚬 cos so needed but pulling her into your lap cos you don't wanna let go still] Janis: [could be worse, could be meth] Jimmy: [true facts] Janis: [now everyone calm] Jimmy: [take all the moments you can to be soft] Janis: [just got no business being this close and smoking but at least you both are so it's fine] Jimmy: [I'd die literally] Janis: [my poor boo can't speak 'cos she can't breathe] Jimmy: [don't like set anything on fire either tbh] Janis: [lmao not a mood] Jimmy: [that'd be next level drama] Janis: [winnie drama] Jimmy: [that silly old bear] Janis: ['is my tea going cold?'] Jimmy: [lols because he's obvs not made it yet because #distracted we've all been there boy just put the kettle on and get no further like] Jimmy: [but puts his hand out like help me up so they can go inside] Janis: [does but pulls him towards her first and is just looking like !!?! all the emotions] Jimmy: [says 'what' in the softest way literally ever] Janis: [just gonna kiss him but so soft 'cos you're unsure but also don't know where to begin with anything] Jimmy: [all the soft kisses and comfort ever because he's never seen her like this before so he's like must not say or do the wrong thing] Janis: [have a brew lads] Jimmy: [fixes everything so actually go and make it boy give her chance to work out how she's gonna do this like] Janis: [makes me lol but also sad like there's so much you gotta explain before you can get to the now] Jimmy: [literally like no wonder Grace don't wanna see a therapist how exhausting] Janis: when did your mum go Jimmy: does it matter? Jimmy: she's not gonna show up here tonight Jimmy: you're alright Janis: obviously Janis: just thinking Jimmy: what? Jimmy: we've got enough milk to see us through if that's what she went for Janis: doesn't matter Jimmy: go on Janis: if it was about the same time Janis: as my sister Janis: Bobby is 6, yeah Jimmy: She didn't leave him in the hospital or owt like that Jimmy: let him get to nursery age, like Janis: that's something Jimmy: might've been better Jimmy: wouldn't remember her then Janis: does he Janis: remember, like Jimmy: a bit Janis: yeah Janis: Grace said he asked if she had a mum Janis: at the fair Jimmy: he's always doing that Jimmy: tries to go home with kids if he likes the look of theirs an' all Janis: fair Jimmy: 💔 I can't get away with it, me Janis: you probably could Janis: some of them have very unsatisfying marriages, babe Jimmy: just trying to get a tea I don't have to cook myself, babe Jimmy: but tah Janis: don't get nothing in this life for free Janis: soz Jimmy: alright, rich girl Janis: shut up Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: you're taking forever Janis: am I getting a biscuit too, like Jimmy: ruin the surprise Janis: I can pretend Jimmy: you're not that good of an actress Janis: rude Jimmy: only if that's your back up career Jimmy: and you'd have to get well fed up of the modelling first Jimmy: unlikely love the 📷 you Janis: now I'm an attention seeker Janis: charming Janis: and the 📷 loves me, tah Jimmy: nah just a 🥇 muse Jimmy: so supportive of my talents you Janis: you are good Janis: no lie Jimmy: [brings in the tea and a mug cake he has made for her to be comforting cos cute nerd] Janis: [what a sweet boy] Jimmy: [when that's about the extent of your cooking ability bless him] Janis: ['you're so-' does 🙏 hands to show 😇] Jimmy: [😏] Janis: [she sits she sips] Jimmy: [likewise just drinking that tea] Janis: [just shrugging 'cos gotta be blase like this is so casual and matter of fact okay 'my sister did run away, like, but then she had a car crash so, dead now'] Jimmy: [just looking at her like ???!! cos what can you even say 'shit, sorry' so awks] Janis: ['was four years ago so it's whatever'] Jimmy: ['did she leave 'cause of all that bollocks with your sister and cousin?'] Janis: ['partially but Janis: 'partially but-' sighs 'she was fucked up because she weren't my dads, third kid in and white, not an easy time'] Jimmy: [just looking at her cos even if you have heard that rumour you'd have thought it was too ridiculous to be true] Janis: [nods like yeah, I know] Jimmy: ['I get why you don't wanna be here, it were like that for us before we moved an' all' a shrug too because obvs also so casual for you] Janis: ['people must've had a field day' sympathetic look 'probably why I said yeah, to the plan, why I give a shit what people say still' shakes her head 'stupid but'] Jimmy: [when you're just having a moment remembering what it was like and you have to shake yourself out of it cos not about you rn 'people are twats, no dickhead but Ian's loving that kind of attention' gives her a look like you're not stupid] Janis: [giving him a nudge like sorry but not wanting to say it 'cos what use is it] Jimmy: [giving her one back as a shameless excuse to then just lean into her shoulder with his for an age like it's not a hug it's so casual bye] Janis: [leaning into it too, which is good 'cos voice is strained now 'cos emotions 'but she thought it was fucked up too, what they're doing, what they all do, she got it, you know'] Jimmy: [nodding cos he agrees that it is fucked up and is also having many emotions but eye contact anyway because wants her to know he gets it and is not going anywhere even though he doesn't know what to do or say about any of this really] Janis: [maintaining even though you'd be trying really hard not to cry for a hot sec there before being so meh it's chill again 'cos easier lbr 'know this is a lot but otherwise you'll just think I'm even weirder, yeah'] Jimmy: [touching her hair for literally no reason like is it even in the way, probably not 'everyone's got something that makes them weird, but you're alright an' all, got loads more shit going for you that counts towards that'] Janis: ['I don't wanna mess this up' and then going in on a kiss 'cos that'll fix this] Jimmy: [letting it happen even though you probably shouldn't because you just wanna make her feel better and also don't want her to think you think she's weird/you don't want her anymore when you obvs love her] Janis: [will stop at a kiss 'cos it'd be clear he weren't into it like per and we don't need that to be a thing for either of you] Jimmy: ['I ain't gonna let you mess this up if you don't let me either' holds his hand out like shake on it with me cos nerd] Janis: [is like 😏 really? but does] Jimmy: [then draws a heart on her with his fingertip like he did at Cali's but on her palm this time after the handshake] Janis: ['you really are the biggest nerd though' but 😍] Jimmy: ['piss off' but a little genuine smile] Janis: ['still like you anyway'] Jimmy: [😏 a look like yeah? and a IRL 👍 because committed to being a nerd now] Janis: ['don't push it, mate'] Jimmy: [playfully pushes her but really soft] Janis: [playfight forever] Jimmy: [just 😍 the whole time like] Janis: ['you really are so'] Jimmy: ['I like you so much'] Janis: [nods 'cos words are risky] Jimmy: ['I- I love you so much'] Janis: ['I love you too, Jimmy'] Jimmy: [gotta just hide your face in a snuggle because dying]

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Give me strength so I don't kill a bitch Janis: serious Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: I can't fuck you if you're in prison, remember Jimmy: unless this is you proposing Jimmy: so romantic 💕 Janis: Can't believe you won't fake marry me Janis: 💔 Jimmy: never said I wouldn't Jimmy: you haven't fake asked Janis: sure, trust you to wanna be savage about it Janis: dickhead 😏 Jimmy: I'm giving you chance to be #goals and 💍 me Janis: that's the vows is it Janis: be #goals forever and ever Jimmy: do you take this girl to be your lawfully wedded dickhead Jimmy: yeah alright Janis: 😂 Janis: such an idiot Janis: but at least you're funny Janis: teach Mia something, yeah Jimmy: no tah Jimmy: I know the kind of shit she wants me to teach her Janis: 😒 don't Janis: I'm already this close to actually smacking her without that mental image Jimmy: wait til I'm off work before you knock her out Jimmy: if you love me Janis: as bad as Grace Janis: start selling tickets Jimmy: we all wanna be there with pom poms & 🍿 Jimmy: don't be shy Janis: yeah I'm so sure Janis: you'll get your chance to wear the skirt one day, babe Janis: don't worry Jimmy: 💔💔🎻🎻🎻 Janis: mm Jimmy: I'm gonna show up & 💍 when you're about to smack her Jimmy: put you off 'cause you don't want me there Janis: you probably would Janis: love nothing more than shaming me Janis: but I ain't giving you my location so good 🍀 Jimmy: & you love the angle but fine I won't get down on my knees for you Jimmy: spoilsport Jimmy: pissed on your own parade there, girl Janis: shut up Janis: distracting me Janis: gotta be on my A game, boy Jimmy: you're too busy shutting her up to make me Jimmy: & she don't need your A game Jimmy: a breeze would turn her bones to dust Janis: you on my side or not, boy Janis: ain't a tag-team effort between you and her is it Jimmy: nah I'm dumping you for her & this is how I'm letting you know Janis: ah well Janis: your girlfriend is about to get fucked up Janis: soz about it Jimmy: she can lick her own wounds 🐍 perks Jimmy: it's alright Janis: boring Janis: but if that's what you're into these days Jimmy: once I teach her what to do with that 👅 I'm set for life Janis: disgusting Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: 😑 Janis: go away Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: how many rounds you going? Jimmy: come see me after Janis: you're rude Janis: but like you said, ain't gonna take much, is it Janis: sure Jimmy: good Jimmy: I miss you Janis: I miss you too Janis: this is all easier to ignore when you're about Jimmy: I'm going nowhere Jimmy: still smack her though 'cause neither is she Janis: 👍 Janis: long time coming Janis: but I'll try not to kill her Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: I'll help you hide the body, don't worry about it Jimmy: #peakromance Janis: have to be good Janis: it's how her dad shows he cares, appaz Jimmy: smacking her about? Jimmy: #relatable Jimmy: or hiding the bodies of her enemies Janis: 😬😂 Janis: nah though, threatening legal action if anyone dares to talk back to her, never mind smack her one Jimmy: the bodies thing is probably true too Jimmy: I ain't seen Gracie for a while is all I'm saying Janis: 🤞 Janis: sadly, 'less Mia gave her wifi in her grave Jimmy: what's the point of 💀 if you can't liveblog it #duh Janis: turn your location on girl Janis: maybe dig you up 'fore you suffocate Jimmy: might do Jimmy: might not do Janis: obvs gotta make her promise to change her ways Jimmy: 👍🍀 Janis: you're right Janis: maybe just let her 👻 Jimmy: not an invitation for me & her to be #couplegoals though Jimmy: your 👻 lad only Janis: swear to God she better keep her ghost hands to herself Janis: or I'll kill her properly Janis: send her 😈🔥 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: she'll be waiting for me there getting more 💕😍 then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: she can wait Janis: you said you're staying Jimmy: I am Jimmy: unless you send me away Janis: not gonna send you to hell Janis: have to fuck me off a lot more than this Janis: soz to disappoint Jimmy: not to be that dickhead but Jimmy: it's hell wherever you ain't Jimmy: so not much to do Janis: baby Janis: you're so genuinely #goals sometimes it hurts Jimmy: I'm not actually trying to distract you right now Jimmy: I swear Jimmy: I'm just Janis: hot Janis: I know Janis: ain't your fault, really Jimmy: I just love you Jimmy: & that is your fault Janis: I'll own it Jimmy: alright then Janis: not just 'cos I love you too Jimmy: course not Jimmy: but it'll do me that you do love me too Janis: you know I do Janis: a lot Jimmy: gimme more though Janis: how Jimmy: I'll let you know Jimmy: other than accepting my proposal obviously Janis: alright 😏 Janis: please do Jimmy: 👌 Janis: right, this is actually happening Janis: accept the charges if I have to bell you from jail, yeah? Jimmy: I suppose Jimmy: make me feel like the tables have turned, yeah rich girl Janis: if you like Janis: roleplay, fun Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: keeping it #goals baby Janis: [fight] Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: 🥇🥇🥇🥇 Janis: you know it Jimmy: start running now Jimmy: 👮🚔 Janis: way ahead of you, babe Janis: as per Jimmy: #duh Jimmy: SUCH an athlete Janis: you'd reckon so if you saw her face Janis: that felt good Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Janis: how long you got left of your shift Jimmy: hour & a half Jimmy: come here when you're done running victory laps Jimmy: I've saved my last break Janis: Good Janis: gotta channel this energy somewhere Janis: and I want you Jimmy: just don't get her blood on me Jimmy: this ain't the CG none of the customers are thick enough to believe it's Halloween Janis: 🤞 Janis: I'll clean up Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Jimmy: I wanna do it Jimmy: but we don't have time Janis: we'll make the most of what we do still Janis: don't be sad, baby Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I know but Jimmy: I want more time Janis: after Janis: not that long to wait Jimmy: it feels like Janis: always does Janis: whenever we have to be around other people even Jimmy: you reckon it's ever getting any easier or nah Jimmy: 'cause bit rude Janis: try and be less fuckable Janis: idk Jimmy: how Janis: alright bighead Janis: true but Janis: no one likes a showoff Jimmy: you do Janis: bit Jimmy: loads Janis: maybe Janis: if you really make the most of your break, like Jimmy: no challenge but still accepted Jimmy: I want you so much Janis: you know I love you Jimmy: I love you too Janis: I'm glad you exist Janis: everyone else is shit Jimmy: you Jimmy: you're the only one I care about Jimmy: let's go somewhere when I'm done here Jimmy: I'll call in sick tomorrow Jimmy: it don't even matter Janis: okay Janis: if you're sure obviously I want to Janis: where Jimmy: let's just not come back until my next shift Jimmy: fuck school Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: yeah? Janis: I don't care Janis: anywhere with you Jimmy: we can just get on a train or whatever then Jimmy: I don't give a fuck either Janis: my nan and granddad have a caravan not far away Janis: but far enough Janis: might work Jimmy: is anyone else in your massive family likely to be using it Janis: eurgh Janis: shouldn't be but Janis: how to subtly check without telling everyone where we are 🙄 Jimmy: it's alright we'll just leave if anyone else turns up Janis: it'd only be nan and granddad in term time anyway so we've got good odds of being left alone Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: let's do it then Janis: okay Janis: I'll hang around 'til you finish then Janis: no point going home Jimmy: I'll have to Jimmy: pack a bag & chat to the kids about it Jimmy: but we can go after Janis: yeah Janis: 'course Janis: they'll be alright, yeah Jimmy: you want me to pack shit for you seeing as you ain't going home Jimmy: all I can do is let 'em know I ain't just fucking off Jimmy: my dad too I'll pen him a note so he don't bell the 👮🚔 Jimmy: It ain't gonna be good but neither is this, here now Janis: if you like Janis: I don't care but you might once I start to stink Janis: probably a plan Jimmy: I'll just throw you in the shower, girl 💪 Janis: like to see you try Janis: have you know I'm undefeated, boy Jimmy: then you'll see me try Jimmy: I'm ready Janis: you've always been a very gracious 🥈babe Jimmy: oi Jimmy: come here & call me a loser Janis: come on, there's no losers babe Jimmy: easy to say when you're the winner, babe Janis: how bad does losing feel though, really Janis: you know it's still good Jimmy: I'll show you in a bit Jimmy: 🥇 me Janis: 😏 Janis: we'll see then Jimmy: just remember to tell me how it feels, alright Janis: do my best Janis: you do make it hard to speak though sometimes so Jimmy: do my best Jimmy: please be on your way Janis: I am Janis: time me if you wanna Janis: 💪 Jimmy: 👌 nerd Janis: [5 mins or w/e] Janis: come out here and say that to my face Jimmy: [does] Janis: [kisses his face] Jimmy: [kisses her neck] Janis: [noise like oh hey] Jimmy: [tells her how long she took to get there cos also a nerd] Janis: [pouty like nu-uh!] Jimmy: [pouty lip thing for life] Janis: ['I missed you' and showing him] Jimmy: [says it back & likewise cos they don't have a lot of time] Janis: [enjoy lads] Janis: do you think I should go get some stuff Jimmy: you should stay with me Janis: okay Janis: go make me a drink then, boy Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [we know the drill he's making it but looking at her like 😍] Janis: you're cute Janis: I can't wait to go Jimmy: you Jimmy: you can go to mine & pack for us & make it quicker Janis: I could Janis: still have to talk to the kids though Jimmy: just don't pack the 🐶 Jimmy: can give 'em a ring though Jimmy: might not even be there Janis: 💔 but baby Janis: cool, long as you're sure Jimmy: [shrugs at her from behind the counter] Jimmy: it ain't gonna go decent however I say it Jimmy: so whatever Janis: you still wanna though Jimmy: we're going Jimmy: if I have to listen to every dickhead talking about your #girlfight for the next week I'll 💀💀💀 Janis: 🙄 Janis: she thought Janis: got the scratches to prove it Jimmy: sexy Jimmy: but it's not gonna convince me to stay here Janis: I ain't trying to convince you Jimmy: you've already convinced me to go Jimmy: I've got the marks to prove it too Janis: 😏 Janis: trust me, you had more fun than I did Janis: even if it was pretty satisfying Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: you'll have fun with me Jimmy: if you ain't had enough just now which 💔 Janis: never enough Janis: not a diss Janis: brag if anything, your speciality Jimmy: good save, girl Jimmy: come get your smoothie Janis: okay lemme just enjoy the view for a sec longer Janis: [then does] Jimmy: lemme just enjoy that view for as long as possible Janis: knew there was a reason you were asking me to leave Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: [keeps looking back] Janis: stop looking at me like that Jimmy: [gives her an even hotter look instead cos he be like that] Jimmy: miss you already Janis: I definitely miss you more Janis: only got yourself to blame Jimmy: sounds like a challenge that Janis: challenge to behave Janis: for once Jimmy: 💔💔 Jimmy: I give you a minute before you're changing your mind & wanting me not to Janis: 💪 Janis: challenge accepted Janis: I'm tough, tah Jimmy: ⏲ Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: I only wanna be 💕 Janis: you're rude Jimmy: if you like Janis: you know how bad I want you but we can't Janis: so very rude Janis: actually Jimmy: we can Jimmy: just Jimmy: another ⏲ going for that Janis: it's not long is it Janis: make it worth it Jimmy: when you've got to mine, packed and 🐶💕 I'll be done Jimmy: promise Janis: okay Janis: we can do this Janis: think how long we're gonna have Janis: just us Janis: and nothing to do Jimmy: just you to do Janis: not a chore, is it? Jimmy: ask me at the end of the week Janis: 😂 piss off Jimmy: just saying Jimmy: you love dickheads but do you love 'em 24/7 Janis: like we spend loads of time apart as is 😏 Janis: don't worry, there's more than one room if you're testing me Jimmy: 😂 piss off Janis: but I ain't getting in those tiny twin beds so Janis: be nice Jimmy: I am Jimmy: always nice me Janis: nah Janis: but I wouldn't like you if you were Jimmy: I reckon I could still get you to like me Janis: really? Janis: is this you admitting you are a bit of a 🤓 Jimmy: I'm admitting nowt til we're out of reach of the 👮🚔 Jimmy: life of crime starts so soon Janis: watch out Skerries Janis: 👊 Jimmy: Bonnie & Clyde 39 Janis: I'll straighten my hair so I can get my #whitepassing priviledge then 👍 Jimmy: weren't there a promise about never doing nowt like that Jimmy: except you reckoned you never would anyway Jimmy: don't 💔 me that ain't part of the crime spree Janis: well excuse me for not wanting to be shot, white boy 😂 Jimmy: if you ain't willing to die for me, Juliet we can call this off right here Janis: I thought I told you to stop being so suicide-pact-y Janis: don't want anyone to actually ring garda, like Jimmy: you say suicide pacty I say #ultiimategoals Jimmy: but FINE 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: don't Janis: actually giving out gracie vibes and terrifying me Jimmy: #whenyouvetakenthewrongtwinontherun Janis: ask her Janis: sure she's still up for it Jimmy: don't Jimmy: course she is Janis: you're such a cocky dickhead Jimmy: why you like me Janis: 😒 Janis: why she does too, obviously Jimmy: ain't my fault you two are #twinning with your tastes, girl Janis: fuck off Janis: you ain't had to misfortune of meeting any of her exes Jimmy: just the one Janis: he don't count Jimmy: my KO still does though Jimmy: & do any of 'em count as exes if she's fucking 'em still Jimmy: arguably not Janis: shut up Janis: don't be gross Jimmy: calm down Jimmy: I ain't suggesting you join in or owt Jimmy: me either Janis: why are we talking about her Jimmy: you brought her up Jimmy: & her exes Janis: well now I'm ending it Jimmy: alright Janis: take the dog for a shit whilst I'm at it Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: write my dad a note Jimmy: such a way with words you Janis: ha Janis: funny Janis: he'll say I've kidnapped you just to fuck w me Jimmy: nah he'll say I've legged it Jimmy: loves to tell the others I don't give a shit & he does Jimmy: he can't turn 'em against you with that big house & dog training 🏆🏆 Janis: can definitely buy love Jimmy: if not love then less hatred Janis: works for me Jimmy: works for Ian too Jimmy: fucked himself on respect though Jimmy: don't have enough of a wage packet for that Janis: 💔 Janis: don't know how many times I've told him we could be bezzie mates Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: you're fucking the wrong family member for that one Jimmy: even if you were doing him it'd be a stretch Janis: why you tryna hurt me rn Jimmy: save him a job Jimmy: since he don't do the ones he has Janis: too good, you Jimmy: yeah Janis: tragedy Jimmy: 🎭 Jimmy: let's say it's a comedy Janis: if you like Janis: again, works for me Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: you ain't unlocked enough 💕 or 💸 to reveal my tragic backstory, soz Janis: backatcha Jimmy: works for me Janis: she's pissed everywhere Janis: 😑 Janis: gonna need to start charging more Jimmy: send Ian the bill Jimmy: he'll love that Jimmy: also feel free to leave it for him to sort Janis: we all know she's your 💕 Jimmy: yours Janis: sure Janis: whatever you say Janis: I'll keep your secret Jimmy: just 'cause you've given yours away by being so blatant Jimmy: leave it & me out tah Janis: you wish Janis: 🖕 Janis: such a mystery Jimmy: you wish, Jillian Janis: mhmm Janis: now who's blatant Jimmy: open book with a forgettable name you Janis: then forget it Jimmy: I do Jimmy: loads Jimmy: just happened then Janis: forget us going away if you're gonna be such a twat Jimmy: what are you on about Jimmy: I'm a twat everywhere & anywhere Janis: whatever Janis: go do some work Janis: ain't in the mood Jimmy: you're not serious Janis: we can still go Janis: just Jimmy: what Janis: I don't know Janis: genuinely Janis: forget it Jimmy: has that worked any time you've said it Jimmy: or made things weird Janis: so it's all my fault Janis: cool Jimmy: did I say that Jimmy: nah I said telling me to forget it ain't gonna make it happen Janis: you also said I make things weird all the time so Jimmy: you do Jimmy: so do I Janis: not what you said Jimmy: you were being weird before I said it so Jimmy: what's the problem Janis: I just don't want to think about my family Janis: let alone talk about them Janis: that's what this is about, alright Jimmy: it weren't like I wanna hear about 'em Jimmy: no begging here Janis: don't then Janis: hear enough without you adding your voice to the conversation Jimmy: a conversation you started Jimmy: but yeah whatever I'll shut up Jimmy: like you said, loads of work I could be doing Janis: if you like Janis: bye then Jimmy: if you like Jimmy: which you obviously do Janis: I'm telling you I don't Jimmy: you're also telling me to shut up Jimmy: so what the fuck do you want me to do Janis: why do I have to know Janis: work it out Jimmy: why do I have to work it out Jimmy: like this is a challenge all of a sudden Janis: it is Janis: ask anyone Janis: if you don't want to then don't Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: no it's not Jimmy: if you don't want to push me away then don't Janis: as if it's as easy as choosing Jimmy: it's trying which ain't easy but what the fuck is Jimmy: this? Jimmy: I don't think so Janis: I am trying Jimmy: good Jimmy: when you wanna try harder you know where I am Janis: fuck off Janis: you patronizing prick Jimmy: that's the easy route right there Jimmy: take it Jimmy: go on Janis: no it ain't Janis: 'cos I need to go Jimmy: then go Jimmy: like I said, easy Janis: I wanted to go with you Janis: dickhead Jimmy: I was gonna go with you dickhead Janis: well you ruined it Janis: yeah, you Jimmy: fuck you Janis: fuck you first Jimmy: whatever Jimmy: blame me Jimmy: on you go Janis: yeah whatever Janis: take what I can get Jimmy: lucky you Janis: 🍀 Janis: call me rich girl whilst you're at it Janis: hit all the  fuck you marks Jimmy: so you can blame me for what you've got & I've not Jimmy: yeah alright Janis: it's not me that brings it up Janis: constantly Jimmy: you don't wanna bring anything up Jimmy: I got that Janis: oh I'm sorry but you established we ain't ready for the tragic backstory did you not Jimmy: & that means we'll just fuck forever & never talk about anything, yeah Jimmy: that & you can run off whenever the fuck you need Janis: you said you don't want to talk about them either so why the hell does this matter even Janis: and I keep saying, I'm not going without you Janis: I did it once to you Janis: once Jimmy: I could give a fuck about them Jimmy: you're the one being a dickhead Jimmy: what matters is you could go whenever you like Jimmy: I'm the one who has to jump through a million hoops to do anything Jimmy: that I need Janis: Okay I'm sorry that you have family and obligations Janis: I already felt bad, actually Janis: I'm not forcing you to go Jimmy: nah you're just stopping me Jimmy: when I want to Jimmy: & fuck knows why even Janis: I ain't said you can't Jimmy: but I can't Janis: not because of me Jimmy: it's all my fault, you've already said Janis: no Janis: not what I meant Janis: 'cos of the kids Jimmy: it ain't their fault I ain't going Jimmy: or if I can't Jimmy: they didn't ask for this Janis: I didn't say fault Janis: it's just why Jimmy: it ain't why Jimmy: that's 'cause of my mum & dad Janis: well, yeah Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: this is stupid Jimmy: it's been stupid for ages Janis: then stop being so Janis: pedantic Jimmy: stop being a dickhead Janis: fine Jimmy: 👌 Janis: is it Janis: or nah Jimmy: gotta be Janis: it don't Jimmy: I don't wanna fight with you any more Jimmy: so yeah it does Janis: is that enough Janis: serious Jimmy: like I said, gotta be Janis: Jim Janis: come on, that's bullshit Janis: we're not doing that Jimmy: you can bring as much bollocks as you want to this convo & say that to me Jimmy: alright then Janis: I mean Janis: fucking hell Janis: let me fix it Jimmy: you can't put all the blame on me & then be the one to fix it Jimmy: that don't even make sense Janis: I didn't! Janis: you just keep saying I did but Janis: I ain't trying to Jimmy: I ruined it, you said Janis: I didn't mean it Janis: obviously I did but sorry for not wanting to own that immediately Jimmy: have it how you like Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: I already told you, I don't wanna fight about this Janis: stop saying that Janis: that don't fix anything Janis: it's as bad as forget it Jimmy: I don't know how to fix this Janis: so fuck forever yeah Jimmy: don't say that Jimmy: I didn't Janis: not to start this up again but you definitely did say that Janis: I don't want to Janis: but I don't know how to fix it either Jimmy: I just want you Jimmy: you know that Jimmy: I love you Janis: I love you Janis: I'll fix it somehow Janis: whatever Janis: whatever it takes not whatever Jimmy: tell me where to meet you Jimmy: as soon as I'm done here Jimmy: we can just Janis: I'm sorry Janis: for fucking Janis: the hassle Jimmy: I'm sorry for my bit of it Jimmy: I didn't mean to make you kick off Jimmy: or owt Janis: you don't need to Janis: it was stupid Janis: you didn't do anything Jimmy: It didn't leave it out though Jimmy: I could've Janis: you were just trying Janis: but alright, accepted, like Jimmy: give Mia another smack Jimmy: you'll feel better again Jimmy: & we can start over Janis: 'til her dad murders me or reads me my rights or some shit Jimmy: I believe in you, girl Janis: thanks Janis: don't deserve you Jimmy: yeah you do Jimmy: & if her dad kicks off I'll come knock him out Janis: hot Jimmy: you are Janis: nah Janis: I'm a pain in the arse Janis: naggy bitch Jimmy: you can be all of 'em Jimmy: it don't cancel out Janis: 😂 Janis: tah darling Jimmy: it's alright Janis: I miss you Janis: I've cleaned up and walked her though so Janis: welcome Ian Jimmy: I appreciate it Jimmy: I'll show you Jimmy: just come back Janis: you want me to Janis: I've already fucked your shift enough, I know Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: I'm nearly done anyway Janis: okay then Janis: coming Jimmy: if you don't run I could be finished by the time you get here Jimmy: maybe Janis: be hard Janis: athlete that I am but Janis: take it slow Jimmy: do it for me baby Jimmy: when I see you I'll have to kiss you whether I'm still working or not Janis: um why are you actually being so fucking Janis: right now Janis: are you doing it on purpose Jimmy: I miss you too Jimmy: that's it Janis: thanks for not letting me ruin it Jimmy: I promised Jimmy: tah for not letting me Janis: I promised too Janis: know I make it difficult but Janis: you know Jimmy: it ain't like I make it any less Jimmy: you know I'd rather fight with you than be around anyone else Jimmy: just don't leave Janis: I ain't trying to give you anything else in your life to worry about or stress or Janis: but I won't Janis: swear on my life Jimmy: I worry about you all the time Jimmy: that's just Jimmy: giving a shit Jimmy: I'm never gonna stop doing that Janis: I'm Janis: not used to liking that Janis: or wanting it Jimmy: I know Jimmy: I'm not used to doing it 'cause I want to though so I get it Jimmy: you're not an obligation to me & that's weird but Jimmy: how I like it Janis: 'cause Janis: the way family 'cares' Janis: it does fuck all Janis: makes everything worse, usually Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: you know how my dad 'cares' so Jimmy: but you're more than family to me Janis: yeah Janis: I feel it too Jimmy: can we still go Janis: yes Janis: 'course Janis: we both still need to Janis: even if you wanna ignore me the whole time, you have to come Jimmy: that isn't what I want Jimmy: I want Jimmy: you Janis: good Janis: that's all I want too Jimmy: I'm gonna make everything better again Jimmy: we'll just leave everything behind like we planned Janis: it'll be good Janis: we're so good Janis: honest Jimmy: I love you so fucking much, alright Jimmy: forever still Janis: forever and ever and ever okay Jimmy: I swear I'm never gonna leave you Jimmy: I don't care if it's hard sometimes Jimmy: it's the easiest thing I've got Jimmy: & everything I want Janis: I love you Janis: I'm not losing this Janis: you Jimmy: me either Jimmy: I need you Janis: its mutual Janis: you know Janis: so fucking much Janis: I don't even know what I did before Janis: or how Janis: for so long Jimmy: I know Jimmy: & I need you to know too that it ain't always gonna be like this Jimmy: we can leave for real soon Jimmy: we won't have to come back Janis: you mean it Janis: 'cos don't say it otherwise I can't Jimmy: I'm serious Jimmy: you might have to wait longer than you wanna but Jimmy: if you can then we can Janis: 'course I can Jimmy: not gonna be this young forever Jimmy: 👵👴💕 Janis: that's all I've wanted since 👶 basically so Janis: and yeah, know you're buzzing for that Janis: only reason you're sticking around, yeah Jimmy: when's your birthday Jimmy: we can go after that Janis: 13th October Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you reckon they'll give less of a shit, like legally Janis: 'cos we'll be 16 Jimmy: the 👮🚔 will be if Ian gives 'em a bell Jimmy: that works for me Jimmy: he'll only bother when he figures out that we're staying away Janis: yeah Janis: exactly Janis: can't make you come home Jimmy: it don't look good your ex & your kid both doing one but we'll be long gone by then Jimmy: so he can be as fuming as he wants Janis: and give a shit about making him look good Jimmy: the kids will still have me on the end of the phone Jimmy: that's all that matters Janis: yeah Janis: we can make it work Janis: we will Jimmy: we have to Janis: promise Jimmy: trial run starts in a bit then Janis: it's easy Janis: if you can hack it being a bit rough in the beginning Jimmy: I can handle you being a massive dickhead so I reckon I've got it Janis: 😏 okay Janis: letting that slide Jimmy: 💕 Janis: you're allowed like Janis: three lowblows, I reckon Janis: then it's business as usual Jimmy: how many have I done? Janis: I'll be fair and count from that one Jimmy: alright Janis: don't waste 'em, babe Jimmy: don't sound like me that Janis: just sayin' Janis: got a week to deal with me, you know Janis: s'a long time Jimmy: not long enough Jimmy: I don't wanna come back & we ain't even left Janis: I know Janis: if we had somewhere we could be alone proper Janis: it wouldn't be as shit, still a lot but you know Jimmy: really fucked you over by making Dublin into 'something' Jimmy: no squats about now Janis: defs is, just gotta be in the right wrong postcode Jimmy: you reckon? Jimmy: sort it out then, rich girl Janis: yeah, gonna need to kill that nickname or we'll both be 👻 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: no promises Janis: not saying you have to remember my name Janis: not going that hard Jimmy: if you find us somewhere I will Janis: hold you to that Jimmy: you can Janis: I'm outside if you can have a quick 🚬 Jimmy: hang on Jimmy: gimme a sec to finish this bollocks & then it's over with Janis: 👍 ain't going anywhere without you Jimmy: good Jimmy: don't Jimmy: [after a realistic number of minutes to get shit done, a wild Jimothy appears] Janis: [leaning on the wall like a cool bitch just like sup] Jimmy: [kisses her like he said he would as soon as he saw her & it's such a good one like use that wall boy] Janis: ['well, shit'] Jimmy: [is just looking at her like 😍] Janis: [kisses him now she knows they're good, pulling him closer always] Jimmy: [just let them have a lil make out moment cos deserved] Janis: [then taking his hand like c'mon 'cos excited to gtfo] Jimmy: [handholding & walking but he's also 🚬 cos hasn't had chance since when] Janis: ['should we go shop and get load of ready meals for the kids?] Jimmy: [is looking at her even more hearteyes cos that's why he loves you bitch that's such a good idea & so nice bye, does remember to nod though eventually] Janis: [smiles like cool 'cos she ain't gonna see it as a big thing obvs, 'yeah, they ain't all unhealthy as fuck nowadays but even Bobs could do that if he needed so'] Jimmy: [kisses her again cos so nice & also her smiling kills him always so] Jimmy: what do we need? Janis: not much Janis: we'll have a bed and water and all the shit we need in the caravan so Janis: cash for food and some clothes, if you insist, like Jimmy: easy Jimmy: no need to piss about for ages Janis: [nods] Janis: seriously, enough of that as is Jimmy: yeah Janis: [keeps looking at him 'cos can't help it] Jimmy: [more kisses cos he can't help that either] Janis: [puts her forehead to his and is just saying thank you over and over quietly like] Jimmy: [says ILY over and over & also sorry because well] Janis: ['don't be' and more desperate kisses] Jimmy: [literally the hottest make out in the middle of the street or wherever like] Janis: [tryna compose herself so they can do this shopping and go to his but damn] Jimmy: [isn't helping by being hot af excuse him everyone] Janis: can you save this at least 'til we're on the train Janis: killing me, boy Jimmy: [looks at her all innocently but he knows exactly what he's been doing] Jimmy: 😇 me Janis: [gives him a look like hmm but not actually mad so starts smiling with it] Janis: hate you Jimmy: I hate you too, baby Jimmy: so much Janis: [makes ugh! noise out loud 'cos feeling that #frustrated by you rn boy] Jimmy: [is 😏] Janis: just you wait Jimmy: I'm already waiting Jimmy: come here Janis: [does 'cos ain't too proud lbr] Jimmy: [more of the same cos no chill] Janis: ['Jesus'] Janis: are you ever gonna let me live Jimmy: not if it means I have to stop Jimmy: this Jimmy: [even more] Janis: ['Baby, please-'] Jimmy: ['say it'] Janis: [more noises 'cos dying] Jimmy: [goes as hard as he can considering where they are] Janis: ['Okay, okay, fuck! Jimmy, please take me somewhere right now so you can do more. I need it. You.'] Jimmy: [god knows where but he does lead her off somewhere cos same obviously he's made that pretty clear] Janis: [enjoy lads] Jimmy: [& now focus please thanks so much places to be] Janis: [🤤 through life 'cos blissed out can probably leave this here now]