#anyways yes this small part got me emotional😭

[the-carlos-cow-eyes]

Okay, this Is by far one of my favorite Chaggie moments-

LOOK AT MY BABY GIRL'S FACE WHEN CHARLIE SHOWS HER WHAT SHE GOT HER😭

SHE REALLY THOUGHT SHE'D STILL BE UPSET WITH HER AND COULDN'T BELIEVE SHE GOT HER A PRESENT, I-😭

I LOVE THEM, YOUR HONOR😭

[pepperyduck]

EXCUSE ME MA’AM but your angst kills me it’s sooooo good. would you ever write anything like toji being really distant and out of it for awhile, but saying he’s fine, and him accidentally calling reader his late wife’s name? and then fear and hurt and sadness ensues 🥰😭🥲

hey queen yes i got u. i was high as hell writing this so apologies if it's bad!!!!

word count: 1.1k

warnings: hurt/no comfort, abrupt ending, age gap, toji's wife is referred to as "mama" cus i didn't know what name to use, female reader.

masterlist

something was off with toji.

you had dated him long enough, at least you thought, to know when something was on his mind, when something was bothering him relentlessly… but he never opened up about those feelings, it wouldn’t matter how much you pestered and pressed him, he was never going to tell you if he had any negative emotions.

that should have been expected.

toji had a good 10 years or so on you, the extra time in his life was filled with family matters and the tragic loss of his wife — that was seven years ago. he only told you these things plainly; there were never any hints behind his words or tone that he even grieved her. he didn’t even tell you her name, simply referring to her as “mama” or “megu”, something you assumed were nicknames he gave her in their time together.

toji loved and grieved his late wife in silence — there would always be a part of her in him. but since she had gone, he had never found a way to express his feelings, simply pushing everything — sadness, grief and pain — to the back of his mind and focusing on what was in front of him.

you had been his focus for a few months now.

you really thought you were something special to be able to have a guy like toji be interested in you. he was attractive, and cold towards pretty much everyone — except for the women he wanted to get with. but you didn’t know how easily he flipped that switch when it came to women. so, you just assumed yourself as the luckiest girl in the world, striding with a big, scary man on your side everywhere you went.

the two of you were like missing puzzle pieces, almost. often, you gushed to him about your feelings and bothered him into doing the same. his replies were stern and short, a simple “i’m fine” made you content. he didn’t talk much, and you seemed to take control of all the conversations. you thought he was a good listener.

toji tried to spare your feelings as much as possible, but he couldn’t help but revert back to his old ways. it never failed, he would always screw up what he had with ease, like he was used to ruining his own life.

but anyways, back to the problem.

something was wrong with toji. it took you a while to place that something was off. you noticed small things at first, a missing bill out of your wallet or toji not coming home until the early hours of the morning. you knew he had a dangerous, time-consuming job, but it never really bothered you at first.

he helped you pay rent — until he didn’t. you wondered where his money was going; where your money was going. the cash you kept in your purse began to disappear slowly, you just thought you spent it and didn’t remember where. you trusted toji enough to not blame him. you loved him enough, too.

yet the late nights and lack of calls began to bother you. resentment grew over time, until you finally had enough. so when you and toji were finally home alone, late at night, you decided to confront him.

and how badly you’d end up wishing you didn’t.

“tell me, toji. you’ve been acting weird.” concern in your voice, you tried to pry an answer out of your boyfriend. he sat next to you on the loveseat of your shared apartment, fist mushed into his cheek as he rested his head on his hand. toji didn’t even look at you, just cut his eyes away from you at every question.

“i told you, i’m fine,” toji sternly replied, his tone was one of those that told you to drop it.

“you’re not, something’s going on,” you look at him with your body turned towards him, and he continues his stoic stare into the wall.

toji looked so bored, with his scarred lips turned into a slight frown. he had begun to form small dark circles under his eyes, too, and the stubble on his face had began to grow to new lengths. he simply looked disheveled.

“toji, please,” you pleaded, not knowing exactly what you were asking for – you just needed something, anything to go off of and help him. you inched closer to him to wrap an arm around him, but he quickly tried to move your arm off him.

“listen, mama – i mean-,” toji stuttered, too fast before he could realize his mistake, “shit.”

you drew yourself away from him quickly, looking at toji with wide eyes. he turned his head away from you in shame, not allowing you to look him in the eyes – as he knew it would only make him feel guilty.

what the hell? –

you knew he didn’t mean it as a cute nickname. he was calling out to his wife. you felt the small shattering begin inside your chest, a painful pang of heartbreak forcing its way into you.

no, it was just an honest mistake, right?

just a small indicator that toji still thought about his wife, maybe a lot, more often than what you hoped.

just a small indicator that you’ll never be the woman he loves.

make no mistake about that.

silence fell over the room, piercing nothingness filled both of your ears as you began to grow upset. upset would’ve been an understatement, though. you were devastated.

toji curled up into his side of the couch in shame for a few minutes, minutes that felt like long, strenuous hours. you just looked at him in shock, then down at the ground, genuinely unsure of how to react to what he said.

everything was clear,

you weren’t the woman he thought about. his thoughts were constantly filled with his wife, he looked for her in every woman he tried to settle down with – but to no avail, of course. toji would never find the woman he was looking for; because the woman he was looking for was gone.

toji fixed his posture after a few moments, “listen, i’m sorry, i just…” he trailed off, raking his fingers through his hair in shame and confusion. he didn’t know what to say, or how to make the situation any better. he had ruined it all by the slip of his tongue.

“it’s fine, toji,” you mumbled, looking back up at toji with sad eyes.

he looked utterly ashamed of himself in that moment, a pathetic mess of a man you hadn’t seen from him before. so much vulnerability radiated from him. he pitifully looked you in the eyes, leaning back against the couch tiredly. he just looked so sad. there was a pain behind his eyes you hadn’t seen over the months of you dating.

the next words he spoke to you broke you indefinitely,

“you just remind me of her, so much.”

taglist: @kundere20000000 @missakward123 @lagataprrr @cherriee-ee @ourfinalisation @shiroganekagami

let me know if u want to be added!

[the-roo-too]

candy -> myoui mina ver

aka the fluff alphabet

admiration (what does she absolutely adore about you)- mina loves how much you love her group. you’re twice biggest defender fr. knows all the cheers by heart and uses twice songs as your ringtone lol

body (what’s her favourite body part of yours)- in my prime i read my fair share of ice queen mina fanfiction, so i’ll say hands! cause she can look all elegant and fancy and intimidating while STILL holding her gf’s hand hihi

cuddling (how she likes to cuddle)- i think cuddling happens naturally when you two are sitting next to each other on the couch for example? like watching a movie and sitting at an arm’s length turns into you half sitting on her lap while she’s half asleep lol

dates (what’s her ideal date)- i’m thinking very romantic, but simplistic. once in a while you get off work earlier than mina and come home to cook you two a yummy, candlelit dinner. that’s more than enough for her

emotions (how does she express her emotions around you)- remember when i said ice queen… yeah. but only at first! its like, you asked her out and she agreed but she was so excited for the date and tried to hard to be composed she actually freaked you out 💀

family (does she want one)- i’m gonna say yes. mina feels like the type of person who would want to settle down eventually and have a mini-me running around

gifts (what about gift giving)- mina is rich ok. rich parents, one of the most successful groups in korea… she gives you gifts casually, thinking they’re just a small thing that reminded her of you while it’s an sickeningly important watch or something lol

holding hands (does she like to hold hands)- as i said before, yes. i think she also likes to drag you around in certain situations. if you’re taking too much with one of her members for example, and not giving her enough attention, she’ll subtly grab your hand and drag you away

injuries (what would she do if you got hurt)- burn down whatever hurt you. and i lean BURN. she’s serious about her baby getting hurt

jokes (does she like to joke around)- yes BUT, you almost never expect it. mina doesn’t feel like the type to pull pranks so when she makes a harmless joke or says something ironically you usually think she’s being serious 😭

kisses (how does she like to kiss you)- gentle and calm. mindful and demure. my girl has all of the time in the world ok

love (what’s her love language)- gift giving! pushing the ice queen trope, i think mina is aware people see her as colder or more closed off so she’s actually scared you’ll think she doesn’t like you because she isn’t being as affectionate. in return, she’ll spoil you rotten. every thing that reminds her of you, even the tiniest bit, she gets it.

memory (what’s her favourite memory together)- i’ll say introducing you to her members. because they’re such a big part of her life, she waits with it until she thinks you’re really the one. her parents have met you before twice lol. anyways, the small twinkle in your eyes as you chatted shyly with her members, holding her pinky with your for mental support—that’s her core memory

nighttime (how does sleeping with her look like)- you two just sleep on your assigned sides of the bed. one way or another you’ll get entangled during the night, but neither you nor mina mind falling asleep while laying side by side.

oddity (what’s one quirky thing about her)- i think ballet is very quirky. years of practice, she subtly pokes your side every time you’re not standing straight. she just doesn’t want you to get back aches tho :((

pet names (what does she like to call you)- the most cute, tooth rotting names and i’m not even joking.

quality time (how does she like to spend time with you)- you’re playing minecraft and/or animal crossing with her, end of discussion

rush (does she rush into things)- nope. as i said before, she has to get used to you. you were the one to ask her out so she has to get to know you on that level now, then get to know the other you while you slowly warm up to her too

secrets (how open is she with you)- not very open. through your relationship, she slowly unravels her secrets to you, but it takes time and you have to be patient with her.

time (how long did it take her to confess)- you asked her out, so there’s that. but confess her love? man i’m gonna say a couple years lol

upset (what’s her reaction when you’re upset)- if you’re upset after a fight, she’s upset too and then she just apologises the next day, tired of sleeping in bed without you. other than that, she’ll be surprised and try to immediately console you

visibility (is she afraid of the public opinion)- not really. if you’re in love, she doesn’t see your relationship as something the public has a say in

warrior (how often do you fight)- only when you’re tired after work. and it’s stupid stuff too. you placed your shoes on the spot she usually uses so you two banter about it for two minutes until you’re both in bed, laughing about how stupid that was

x-ray (is she able to read you)- yes! someone has to bffr. mina knows you like the back of her hand lol

yes (how would she propose to you)- remember the dates when you come home early and cook dinner? she takes a day free and when you get home early for your date, she surprises you by taking you out to a fancy restaurant instead. she’s so nervous too 😭 but you’ll say yes, right?

zen (what makes her feel calm)- playing games with you! stressed mina will absolutely drag you to your pc room (because you do have that) and sit you down with her to build a cute house in minecraft

part of [the fluff series]

[bunnithots]

story time !!!! i usually post these on my twitter account shybabybun but i ran out of characters, so i will post it here

this is not a fantasy post - this is me talking about an actual experience with my partner 🎀 when I make these they are a lil messily written and not very refined, so apologies for that

if you’re interested in reading my previous ones on twitter:

story time #1

story time #2

story time #3

cw// spanking (myself), overstimulation

so last night initially i wanted to record a video with him controlling my toy but the way it ended up working out was no video (oopsies) and instead him watching me on camera in a see through bodysuit >.< i like testing out the angles showing him the front, the back, arch for fun, etc. hehe

when I was laying on my side ass in his face oop, he asked me to spread for him and when i did he was like “someone is wet” “huUUH” but my huh wasn’t as in I didn’t know, it was I didn’t know he could SEE it! and he was like “oh maybe I’m wrong” and I just checked for myself and there was a small wet spot visible for sure but when i laid on my back and moved the bodysuit to the side i showed him how wet i actually was can’t have him second guessing ‎/ᐠ .⸝⸝⸝. ྀིﾏ💅🏻 touched myself for him too and it felt very nice

after a lil bit of showing him different angles n stuff i was like “want to see me ride a toy in this position” (just front facing like my videos) and he obv said yes so i grabbed the first toy i could find which was a tentacle and once i got it in i told him he could look (bc i don’t wanna have him watch me at awkward angles sue me) and when i tell you part of the moans being let out were also from exhaustion 😭 but i rode my toy for max a few minutes (if that let’s be honest) while he watched me and talked me through it (he was probably touching himself honestly from how he sounded) he told me i should take a lil break so i laid back with the toy still inside me (it gets so thick going down so i kept having to lift myself up but it probably looked like i was riding it doing that 😭) and he let me know that even laying back it still was a very nice angle from his view (at one point i didn’t realize he was looking at me while we were just talking and i was smiling at what he said only for him to say “I just saw the cutest smile” me over here like “I didn’t know you were looking at me still >.<“ )

after our lil break i rode it a smidge more then he told me I should just lay back and fuck myself for him with it which i did and I didn’t know if how wet i was was coming through the mic but he let me know that he could in fact hear it ! so by that point i was ready for him to control my toy because it just feels so good when he does it, and because he has already been watching me do all the other stuff I asked if he wanted to watch me as he controlled it too and he agreed :3

the lighting throughout was probably iffy but i shifted more towards my lamp for when he was controlling my toy, wanted him to see better and he called me pretty a lot I will say that and I was laying on my back, front facing, hand on tiddy for emotional support bc im shy and cam stuff is still new to me >.< anyway back to it he controlled my toy and made me cum multiple times to the point I kept covering my mouth and face, head thrown back grinding myself against the toy as he made me cum probably 3-4 times like that (obv he gave me breaks in between but my thighs would not stop trembling even when he didn’t have the toy on AHHH sometimes he would say something and they would tremble so hard i was slightly embarrassed and told him not to look at that T—T he found it amusing i fear)

i ended up on my tummy (after many many failed attempts to find an angle I liked) and the view would’ve been like the pillow humping video I posted but no pillow and instead the nora but more butt cheek in your face than that video LOL

and he started to control it again at that angle >.< it didn’t take me long to cum again and I couldn’t help grinding back onto the toy idk for sure how I looked bc my face was in my pillow a lot of the time but from how he sounded it couldn’t have been too bad of a view, I think I may have cum again because of how sensitive I was but I cant remember he did stop the toy to give me a break tho and after asked me to spank myself for him ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ i did it and he turned on the toy right before i did and it made me pause and say “you can’t just do that it’s hard to do it when it’s on” and that made him turn it up a lil more bc he’s a meanie like that and after the first spank I kinda had this like “oh” moment and when he told me to do it again i was VERY close to cumming the third spank im pretty sure I did cum my hand was gripping my own butt cheek the whole time and unintentionally spreading myself for him 😭 and I spanked myself a few more times it made me cum again even faster my hand was srsly just holding my butt maybe bc I needed to hold something the ENTIRE TIME until we were done and once again meaning i was essentially spreading the whole time

Imagine what I must’ve looked like ass grinding back against the toy nonstop, butt cheek in hand expoSING MYSELF AHHHH and yes begging for him to cum for me because I was so worked up and sensitive after orgasming so many times and spanking myself before his eyeballs to the point it made us cum together and I was about to again when he turned it down, immediately “moRE” muffled as fuck coming out of my mouth he said he couldn’t hear me so my head popped up like “more I was so close again” and he made me cum again :3 details not needed

then I laid there like jello, let him watch as I pulled the toy out and when I tell you trying to show him the aftermath my WHOLE HAND was coveRED very wet very messy (also side note when I first pulled it out I looked back at the camera mind you hair all over the place and I completely forgot I still had that bodysuit on it looked so odd to me it freaked me out like “what is that on me??” LMAO but the it hit me it was just what I was wearing)

when I type these out i do miss a lot of details like how he actually asks me to suck on my fingers for him (to help keep me quiet), how much he actually talks during, how there are quite a few more breaks in between for us, he couldn’t see my face during anything bc I am shy and my hair covered most of my face even when I was laying on my tummy, etc. but yeah :3 i like typing these out not just to share them but bc it’ll always help me remember these experiences with him 🩵🫧

[onlyjaeyun]

THREE MORE CHAPTERS WOOOOO (i’m holding back tears) 🥳🥳🥳 i can’t believe poison is coming to an end so soon (it’s been months ik but STILL) first of all i really love how sunghoon and heeseung’s friendship somehow become funnier 😭 like all that sass and all the “ur gf” “well UR gf” is so funny and i’m glad that they kinda both got into relationships around the same period they fr are soulmates anyWHO 🧍‍♀️ i feel so empty knowing that by next week or by the end of this week really there won’t be any more poison updates ☹️ BUT HEY STRICTLY BUSINESS LETS GO🗣️ i’m rlly rlly excited to see everything that’s gonna take place in strictly business and all the ddlg that’s gonna happen 🤭🤭 like i’m sO EXCITED. ANYWAYS poison farewell soon :( i hope u take some sort of small break before starting strictly business bcs i cant even imagine how exhausting working on poison must’ve been, please take care of urself & ur health and most importantly ur mental health zadie <33 we’ll all be here waiting for anything u want to post or release so please take care of urself and don’t feel pressured at all especially since you had to state how much pressuring it is when people ask u for daily updates (and u had to remind them this MULTIPLE times like damn 🤨 get a hint) but yes !! i hope you’re alright and everything is going well sending u lots & lots of love & hugs & kisses, i can’t wait to begin ranting and filling ur inbox about strictly business 😁 <3

- ⁉️

MY BABY!!!!!!🥺🥺🥺🩷

poison!heehoon really are soultwins and it makes me so happy that i managed to portray their friendship just how i i had intended 🤭🤭

and pls not you making me tear up with that second part. i really, really appreciate the love, support and understanding you guys have been sending my way like it's sometimes so surreal to me just how amazing you all are. after so many fnadoms this is the one i've felt the most loved and appreciated and understood like we're all just humans who love the same people and are having a good time and IRGH thank you baby. don't worry, am planning to take a break for a few days once poison ends just to make sure i can give you guys and structly business the best version of myself.okay before i get too emotional and expose my bank information on here im gonna send you the fattest kiss and hope you're taking care of yourself as well. i love you so much 🩷

[dragodina]

10 Songs, 10 People

Thanks so much @except4bunnies for tagging me 😊! That was interesting, a bit emotional but so much fun 🙂.

Since I don't have Spotify I just shuffled my phones music libary.

This is possibly going to be real odd for me 😅 (me and my very strange taste in music 🙈)

But anyway, here we go:

1. "Midnight City" - M83

I don't know why but that song just really positively lightens my mood and makes me want to sing the lyrics loudly at the end and dance along ... against the beat (so I don't). There is even a drum cover from Coop3rdrumm3r on Youtube that I like just as much as the original because, suprise, it has some more additional drums.

2. "Poison" - Freya Ridings

My favourite song of Freyas first album, to me it has some Bond touch to it and her voice ist just soo wonderful. Then those touching lyrics. And listening to them now I feel in some way they are pretty fitting for Julia Grosz and Ela Erol (small wink to @except4bunnies 😉✌🏼).

3. "Cosmic Love" - Florence And The Machine

FATM definitely belongs to my top 3 favourite artists. Not only does she has a unique breathtaking voice but also her lyrics are so heartwrenchingly beautiful. Especially with "Cosmic Love" but also "Falling" in particular. Florence just writes songs and words like they are poems, each song being a chapter and leaves me in awe, in tears and in wonder. And I absolutely love how she includes ever so often a choir in her songs, that feeling of many voices singen her lyrics together with her voice is just so damn powerful (especially in her debut album). And sometimes I'm a sucker for just one line of lyrics that becomes very special to me.

I took the stars from my eyes and then I made a map

And knew that somehow I could find my way back

Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too

So I stayed in the darkness with you

4. "Evigheden" - Scala & Kolacny Brothers

Funny enough (and my music player did that all on its own) Scala is a girls choir from Belgium that became famous for their cover versions. And I absolutely freak-fu**Ing love them. For about ten years I made it a tradition to see them live at least once a year. Another of that top 3 artists of mine. "Evigheden" is just so gently beautiful. Every time I hear that song I close my eyes and at some point it just hits me right in the feels ... and in the heart. The end of the song always seems to destroy me. I can't remember ever not crying when that song comes on. To listen to it live is even harder but also more special. I remember that one time, after loosing a very close loved one, I went to their concert, they played that song. And I burst out in tears sobbing. But I felt it was some sort of a good crying, because I was so deep in memories and the music brought me there and carried me through. It was really embarassing but somehow I needed that in that moment. It will always have a special place in my heart.

(The atmosphere this creates is just so freaking crazy ... yes ladies at 2:45 and 5:42, I get you 😭)

5. "Take Me Home" - Jess Glynne

Another female artist with. I absolutely love her uptempo and dancy souly songs yet the lyrics for "Take Me Home" are so beautiful and Jess voice is just so full of soul.

Came to you with a broken faith

Gave me more than a hand to hold

Caught before I hit the ground

Tell me I′m safe, you've got me now

Could you take care

Of a broken soul?

6. "Happiness" - Jónsi & Alex Somers

No lyrics. Just sound. And that so beautiful that it always takes my breath away, brings me to tears, touches me on another level. Especially the live version of theor performance at the White Festival. Jónsi is part of Sigur Rós and Alex Somers back then was his partner. They together released that one album called "Riceboy Sleeps". One of my favourite albums of all times. There are so many feels, so much history that I can't put into few words. Just that its very special to me.

7. "Hero" - Chad Kroeger feat. Josey Scott

Song to the first "Spider-Man" movie with Tobey Macguire. I liked that one back then 😅. Honestly I haven't listened to that in ages but I sang along right away. Such a cool song after all those years. Even though I'm still chuckling by the beginning line "I'm so high, I can hear heaven". Yeah Spidey, what good stuff did you take?

Someone told me

Love would all save us

But, how can that be

Look what love gave us

A world full of killing

And blood spilling

Now that the world isn't ending

It's love that I'm sending to you

It isn't the love of a hero

(That historical up side down kiss scene 😍 I need something like this for Tinia ..... 😅🥰🙈)

8. "La Terre Vue Du Ciel" - Armand Armar

I'm a bit of a sportsfreak (maybe not so much for the WM right now but normally I really am). I didn't know the song before but in 2018 at the winter olympics Aljons Savchenko & Bruno Massot performance to it. I'm not so much into figure skating but that performance had me in awe, made me speechless. Because it was so damn perfect, just as the song. I really screamed at my screen when they took home gold.

9. "Tornado" - Jónsi

Okay, I probably don't have to state it, but I'm a huge . His first solo album Was just awesome! I love it still so much. And I did had the chance to see his live. I was so insecure back then myself, really shy and I'm an introvert. But I wanted to see him live so badly that me (coming from a small town in saxony) drove to the big city Berlin. I was shoved and mocked. But it was all okay and fine in the end because just to see him live and hear the songs made it all allright.

I wonder if I'm allowed ever to see

I wonder if I'm allowed to ever be free

(That intro and that drummer ...)

10. "Unser Stern" - Ron van Lankeren

Okay, now it get's really embarassing ...

One song from the soundtrack of the anime "Digimon". That was my youth. I loved that anime. And I can still sing along to all of those songs. ALL OF THEM. I probably should look up where I can watch that again, just for the feeling of good old times.

Unofficial additional number (because I made a stupid mistake and suddenly had two number 5s and continued on, wooopsi 🙈)

11. "Ny Batterí" - Sigur Rós

Yep. Thanks smartphone, I almost thought it would leave me without a Sigur Rós song. Sigur Rós. That one band that changed my life completely when I was a teenager. Jónsi with his falsetto voice, the bowed guitar and that way of using his voice as an instrument rather than singing lyrics (they called it hopelandic). At first I even thought it was a woman singing 😅. I don't even know if there is one song of them that I don't like. And yes, it's strange. It's so strange. But I just simply love their music. I can't even describe that feeling. Ever since I first heard that bowed guitar solo intro of the live version of "Ny Batterí" I was under their spell.

There is so much history, so much emotions, so much tragedy and joy and everything in between I connect with their music. The way that "Sæglópur" carried me through when I needed emergency surgery twice and was so fucking scared. My brother came into the hospital and left me with his MP3 player where he had put on all their albums for me to listen to.

Sometimes all you need is to hear, to feel, to listen. And to let go. No words needed. But make up your own story to the music.

Sigur Rós did that for me. And so much more.

Since probably all people that I know and follow around here already got tagged for this I will not tag again or evetypne will get this twice or thrice 😅.

Just have a wonderful 2. advent evening and a good start to the new week all you lovely peoples 😊!

[nonclassyparty]

firstly, tell me why i had that wooyoung shit figured OUT LMAOOO. I literally called it HAHAHA. the way i knew this fool was part of the fruit community

i love the idea that like this story and your writing in general continues to make me go, men ain’t shit fr. but then my tiktok has san getting scared while playing video games and mingi being called pink princess like 🧌.

reading this story with the prologue in mind is insane bc i get that technically no one has really done anything wrong yet ? per se. but san rlly is or ig…is going to be? a grade a asshole.

atp i can understand that sans not at fault (YET apparently) bc like, let’s be real LMAO the agreement was set in place and even y/n herself UNDERSTANDS it, she just continues to play into it bc of her feelings. i cant imagine how san ACTUALLY ends up fucking up (ig putting aside the fact that he couldn’t even be a friend or at the very least an acquaintance and help her w her assignment). like ik y/n probably WILL get mad but she doesn’t rlly hav the right to get mad at him for kissing that girl watever her name is cus she and san aren’t exclusive. but like regardless of the fact, i’m stil obv rooting for y/n bc she’s going through it and she’s being treated terribly by so many ppl for stupid reasons, esp w the knowledge that they all think so shallowly of her and don’t take into account any of her actual interests or experiences like damn.

AND THEN there’s like the fact that (entirely from context and my assumptions alone) y/n didn’t even outright SAY any of this or tell san how she felt until she wrote that letter AFTER THE FACT like ??? that’s INSANE like my brain is scrambling to finish the puzzle before i even hav all the pieces. like ik u said ur not sure about the ending but does san get the letter ? do we even see how he reacts to it ???? (i’m assuming she’ll tell wooyoung or hongjoong tbh)

ALSO i can’t get over the description of why yunho doesn’t like y/n like…damn, homie’s giving incel energy. giving nate jacobs wanting maddy to be a virgin energy (but not nate jacobs wanting maddy cus yunho apparently can’t handle high maintenance bad bitches). idk he’s giving very small peepee, in the closet, daddy issues energy and yeosangs got his own issues that we don’t even know about yet like don’t let me find out i’ll probably lose it.

i’m LITERALLY rambling nonsense and i’m at work rn. anyways amazing work ONCE AGAIN. i cant get over how you write and how you flesh out the characters. cant wait for my boy mingi to be properly introduced. let’s see how my emotions handle that.

-🧃

there is so much to discuss in this message hold on;

first of all, wooyoung being part of the skittles squad well idk how you got that right i'll be honest with you

this is exactly why when i write i have to stay away from atz content bc i went and watched the new wanteez eps today and i just cant write afterwards bc san is so fawking soft and precious how am i supposed to write him as a fuckboy that breaks hearts??? at one point i was like 'damn i shouldve picked someone else as the fuckboy for starring role' and not HIM😭😭

about san fucking up, it will happen in act 8 and i cant say anything else without giving away spoilers but yes! san never promised her anything, yn is aware of it and she knows where the two of them stand deep down but she just doesnt want to accept it (spoiler: that will basically be what the next chapter is about). also keep in mind that the story doesnt end with the letter, there are a couple more chapters afterwards 😭

YUNHO. WAIT NOT TOO MUCH ON HIM?? thats still my man but i wasnt really going for that sort of energy but now re-reading the part about him, i could see why it might've came off like that 😭. basically, with yunho i was going for the type of guy that doesnt like spoilt girly girls who care about makeup, clothes and are shallow, that only dates girls who, by his standards, have some depth to them and are sorta not-like-other-girls but in a pinterest cottage core aesthetic way (kjsghdjfhkfdj??? idk if that makes sense but he likes sweet girls who he can bring back home to his parents basically. its pretty much what svoh yn was) and yet he would still sleep with starring role yn without a doubt 😭. he was inspired by many guys ive meet in college

yeosang's storyline...im kind of nervous about revealing it tbh, also mingi will be properly introduced in the next chapter! as something much more than just boyoung's friend.

thank you so much for this message, i always look forward to yours in particular and theyre so fun to read. i really appreciate them. i hope you have a good day 💝

[cowboylarries]

you’ve got mail

i finally listened to walls but better and gave it my complete attention and i am writing this ask

kmm ➡️ always you : bop! fun! lifts the mood!

then you bring us right into HABIT????? that’s pure commitment right there that’s ROMANCE it was ALWAYS YOU YOURE THE HABIT ITS BEEN AGES DIFFERENT STAGES ALWAYS YOU !!!!! 👏👏

HOW DARE YOU put too young then fearless 😭😭😭😭 that broke me that broke me

AND TWO OF US???? RIGHT AFTER THAT LITTLE “MOM I DID IT” IN FEARLESS?????? I’m going to find u bc do u understand the power that holds? do we know whose voice that is anyway just IMAGINE louis in 2016 not being sure where to go with his solo stuff and dealing with everything and talking to his mother 😩 promised you i’d do this and then he DID IT 🤧🤧 tou hurts very much

okay what’s next oh dlibyh well you’ve broken my heart by making me listen to tou i might as well keep this box of tissues next to me just one sad song after another because I can’t take this in this fragile state his voice 😩😩😩 doing better…. yeah…….

are you going to make me listen to perfect now next that’s the pattern you’re going in aren’t you ???? yes you are 😔💔 i Fuckin knew it and you did it anyway 😩 ok i will cry because i cried to this last week too 🥺 keep ur head up don’t hide away this is PERFECT companion to dlibyh it’s so soft I swear why did he put it at the end I mean I know why but this Oooooooooh would’ve been beauTiFUL after dlibyh it’s so soft so much like a hug 🫂 IM EMO I adore this song even though it was everybody and their mother’s least favorite off of walls but it’s ok it’s ok

oooohch ouch ouch we made it ok keeping with the soft song theme that’s ok sitting in my room thinking about this yep never coming down because you’re perfect we made it together it’s all going to be okay 🤧🤧

DEFENCELESS?? no thank you! this entire playlist is really just us sitting in a small quiet room just listening to a happy louis and then a sad louis reassuring us it’s all going to be okay what is this album and why is it so sad and hopeful 😩

ok walls now this makes me feel better because I love the chorus and the video and he was defenceless and now he’s telling us what he did and i’m not over how he had put defenceless NEXT TO otb on the album because that was Quite An Emotional Ordeal but you’ve done something here I like it

only the brave I have no words about it because you know I’ve been crying I’m going to cry more !! i won’t talk about it in depth I’ve done that too many times we all know what it’s about

great playlist thank you 💚💙

i’ve been waiting for this moment :)

until i was putting it all together i really didn’t realize just how many sad songs there are in walls?? like they are all so soft with a tinge of sadness but yet hopeful at the same time!!! he is truly an artist <3

always you into habit is maybe my fave part about the playlist, although i do think that i did a pretty good job connecting all the songs into the next one. that’s the main thing that i try to switch up or connect bc i love albums that do that so seamlessly

anyways!! i’m glad you liked it <33333

[taechnological]

Hey Sae!

My plans for enjoying CB and Festa got derailed and I've just caught up (I think? Still not sure I've watched or read the important stuff) and I'm slightly disoriented and didn't know who to ask or search so

I'm here😅

I keep reading about people referencing emotional stuff that happened and is that about the Real Bangtan Dinner?

It was emotional but so funny and sincere in true Bangtan style!

I love Namjoon just aggressively pointing whenever someone echoed his sentiments and Jimin's knowing smiles at him doing that xD

Also, Jungkook and his 3 dads NamJinMin being proud about him growing up 😢

That whole tattoo brainstorming session gave me so much life! Not Namjoon making faces at getting a red line (I knew he's the real tsundere afterall) and Yoongi just saying I love my members let's get a red line, I love Min Yoongi like this xD

Hobi throughout the whole thing was a M O O D. My man was just like:

Okay the ending really got to me. Was not expecting Jimin to start the crying and Namjoon to tear up and Yoongi shedding a tear aswell. Namjoon saying they just want to be happy without the rules of the world 😭😭😭

It reminded me of 2018.

But is that the emotional part? Not looking down on anyone if they're sad, we all have our own relationship with BTS and different reactions ♡

And like I'm so HYPED up for all the albums even with just the small snippets we got of Yoongi and RM's veteran album advice to Jimin's thoughts on his first foray into making his own music to Taehyung's perfectionism.

So I was just confused I missed something😅 Since they themselves said they're not disbanding, just taking a break and want to show us more individual side of each member.

Sorry this ask got so long. 😬

But I can't end it without mentioning now I NEED BTS performing as 100 year olds sonehow now that Yoongi has put it in my head xD But him and Jungkook just immediately acting like 100 year olds was just ????? xD

It's so Jin to shut.down. all mentions of him actingxD He really is about to open a gaming youtube channel and just live off that

LMAOOO HII HAHA okay so i gueas this is when i admit that i STILL haven't got the time to watch that video in full, only in small parts 😭😭😭 (or u would have seen me spamming the whole dash with screenshots from it dhdjjs) anyway i promise to make time tmrw and FINALLY watch it, your ask added fuel to the fire !! haha ♡

but yes the ending part was the "sad" part, and like u i also won't invalidate anyone's feelings but, y'all.... trust bts pls. instead of jumping to conclusions or comparing them with others just listen to THEIR own words and u will realize that nothing is broken and everything is good and even better than before actually bc now they're moving forward in a path which is actually healthy for them! let's just support them in this journey instead of crying over smth which is... not even happening pls!

(again, thanks for the push i'll definitely make sure to finally watch the whole video tmrw lololol ♡)

[pattytacuri]

5/14/22

I'm beginning to think I've had a more open and honest relationship with Tumblr than any men in my life. 😭🤣 maybe I'd rather be vulnerable and raw with a bunch of strangers . This is the first time I've written anything all day. Idk what possessed me to but as soon as I got home, I decided to try on almost 75 percent of my closet to see what fits and doesn't fit. If anyone knows me and my closet...they know I own like a million and one outfits . 😭🤣 fucking bpd impulsivity with spending. Clothes have a strange way of telling a story...for example, I still had the pants I interviewed with for my current job ( size 12-not keeping , too big) , the blue dress I got married in ( keeping it for, cute and I might burn it one day) , the black floral dress I went to my friend's 6 year old son's funeral too in late 2015 😭 ( keeping-still fits and I couldn't bear to part with it) , the teal romper I went into a terrible BPD episode with and dissociated in after a fight with my ex in the summer (idk -haven't tried it on-dont know what I'm doing with it yet) , the super short and tight black dress I got drunk in and made a tik tok in with my BFF this summer( keeper- too sexy to give away) , or the blue sweater I first drove independently in October also crashed in November in (its cute so keeper!) , etc, etc.

Anyways, I started to get tired and feel off, and then I realized..mercury is still in retrograde and it's been 10 months from my breakup and ugh...kinda cringy but I had to listen to "Clean" by T Swift cause of lyrics 🙃 and I whined for 30 minutes to my best friend about how haha..grief about it is here. Ugh. My best friend is beyond understanding, I admitted to her a truth out loud about it I hadn't been able to get out and it was good. Honestly, at this point, I'm at this really good place with everything about it. My bpd heart and soul have finally caught up with my logical side of it all. My logical side understand and accepts hard things and acts accordingly but it's hard to get my untamed bpd heart and soul to be on the same page with it. My logical side is 41 and so responsible and practical but idk that bpd soul and heart are irrational. In therapy my logical side is reasonable mind and my bpd side is emotional mind and to get both on them on the same side is wise mind which means tada ...I now have emotional regulation! Ugh...I'm in a dbt group therapy group and all of are there cause we all suck in one way or another with regulating our emotions. Our therapist keeps saying we all probably grew up in emotionally invalidating households and he's not wrong. Where was I going with this before my whole therapy tangent. Oh yes, I'm in my most radical acceptance and wise mind part of the grief. The anger about it has dissipated, I wish all the best for him, etc , etc. There are just these small droplets of grief that show up but at least it's not the hurricane or tornado that lasted for days or weeks.

Tomorrow I start swimming lessons with a private instructor and I hope I do well. I almost drowned at 11 thanks to my dad's drunk negligence so I hope my instructor is patient and understanding. If this works out, I'm gonna try some kind of dancing lessons cause why not. I have no rhythm but if I learned to drive again, anything is possible. I also need to lose 6 lbs. 😭 its sad that I like to eat cake and tacos and can't see myself going back to just salad. 🤣😭

[stilljustbitten]

😂 🗑 😭 🏅 ✏️ 💕

What’s the funniest comment someone has left on a fic of yours?

All I can think of is the one about Andrés having a big d*ck, I don't even remember which fic it was for, maybe When We Collide? Anyway, I mentioned something about Andrés not being small down there, and apparently, another writer did the same recently, and one of my precious readers said we started a "trend" <3

What is one fic idea that you loved at first but then scrapped?

I once had this WIP with the working title Asshole Andrés, and I think it's the only fic I ever really scrapped. The idea was Andrés being all touchy around Martín when he got drunk and pretending nothing happened when he was sober. The scenes in my head (and my Docs) were super hot, but the idea of Andrés doing that to Martín just- didn't fit. I did post one of the chapters as a one-shot.

(I still love the idea I had for the end of that fic: Martín getting drunk with some of the other gang members, suddenly going really quiet, just staring out at the sea. Someone calls Andrés and asks him to come get Martín because something's clearly wrong with him - and Andrés has this whole realization that shit, he might have broken him. Anyway, it's more of a vibe, but yeah.)

Have you ever made yourself cry writing a fic?

Yes (of course, haha, you know I'm emotional). I cried when I wrote the ending of If you can't fix it, you gotta stand it (my Brokeback fic). And I'm going to cry again soon when I finish one of my WIP's. I'm already crying just thinking about it.

What is the fic you’re most proud of?

I have a few fics I'm proud of having posted because I decided to stop worrying about what people were thinking (my kink fic, just to mention one). But otherwise, I'm really fucking proud of my newly posted How I wonder what you are - I think it's a well-written fic, it made me feel a lot of stuff, and also because it's been in my Google Docs since February where I abandoned it, then I rewrote it during the summer and finally posted it.

What is your fave fic from another writer?

This isn't a fair question...

I'm not going to answer that, because there are so many great fics out there - some I love because of the tension, some made me emotional, some were just super hot, and it's impossible to remember all of them.

But I'll mention two fics that hold a very special place in my heart.

Let's Make Art by @dormarunt - I can't explain why, it's super hot, obviously, but there's something else to it. I was literally obsessed, and it's the fic that finally made me start talking to Dee <3 My long, annoying comments on that fic led to my very first Berlermo friendship.

Just Pee by @the--sound--of--rain - because she's fucking brave for even posting it, and it's like nothing I've ever read in this fandom. It made me super emotional. Plus she inspired me to stop worrying and just write what I want to write.

What is the WIP that you are most excited about?

I'm super excited about my Martín/OC fic - because I made an OC, I love him, and I had no idea I was even able to do that? I'll be heartbroken when it ends, I'm not at all ready to let go of my boy.

Right now I'm excited about my Secret Santa fic because I got an interesting prompt, I've let it develop inside my head since November 23 and when I finally sat down and started writing it yesterday, I poured out 4,000 words just like that. I love writing it, and hope the person I'm writing for will love reading it.

Other than that, I've started having feelings about my Martín & Marseille fic again after watching the last part of La Casa de Papel, so maybe that will be my next project.

[domjaehyun]

would you wanna talk more about the poetry you almost got published? 🥺

omg ….. yes ….. wtf yes jsjfsjdj okay wait i’m gonna try and control my response bc . i rly don’t think i should go on abt everything i wanna mention (update: i didn’t rly control my response that much i just spared you like . the nitty gritty of my poems/poetry specifically) if you don't wanna read what i have to say as i gush abt poetry for several paragraphs, you prob don't wanna click the read more jdfgsjldk

but i wrote a poetry chapbook (a collection of poems) a few years ago and it was entirely based on flowers!! so yknow how flowers have meanings? i found 50 diff flowers with all different meanings and i wrote a poem about each flower !! and a lot of the poems are like . some of my best work like some of them i read out loud and i literally can’t finish without crying or like i notice lil things i did and i’m like DAMN that was clever 😭😭😭

and i submitted it to a couple of publishers that were doing chapbook contests and if you won you got a cash prize and you got published! and i didn’t win THOSE but i wasn’t super discouraged bc like . i was 20 . i was up against like . Adults like full blown adults who were probs seasoned poets so i was like fine w it bc it’s good practice anyway!! but so somehow i got the idea to just. submit directly to an agency and i kinda forgot abt it for a while and then one day i got a Thick Packet in the mail from them (which, as i know from my college application days, is usually a very good sign) and !!! when i opened it, i flipped out bc i’d gotten a publishing offer!!!!!!! at 20!!!!! like that was insane to me and my mom and i freaked out abt it and i texted my old gc from college (we all took the same advanced poetry class) and told them and they were super excited for me!!!!

i didn’t end up taking it, though, bc like . the agency said basically that bc i’m young and previously unpublished and wouldn’t have had a pre-existing audience (all valid concerns to have as a publishing agency obviously) that it was more of a risky endeavor to publish me so they offered to publish me if i gave them like . basically at least 2k i think it was 2400 or 2700 … i’ll check i still have the emails and pics of the correspondence but like . again . i was 20 !! i was working at a pretty poorly paid job like . i literally had no disposable income to save up :/ like p much all my money went to helping my mom with bills, my transportation to and from work, food on my lunch breaks, and like . a fraction of it would go to like . living my life and trying to have a fragment of fun yknow?

so i ended up not taking the deal bc i couldn’t afford it :////// was super bummed abt that part but like it’s all good!!

and then like maybe a year or 2 later i submitted the same chapbook (i think i had to select 30 poems to meet the page limit) to a small publishing press that specifically centered around lgbt+ women i think? and during the height of the BLM movement, they did a kind of contest but they waived the fee for any black poets so i figured there was literally no harm in trying yknow? and they answered me a whiiiile later (which was fine !! they were a small literary press and i wasn’t in a rush) and while they didn’t pick me for the winner, they gave me like . super touching praise !!! it meant the world to me !!!

i’m gonna . find some of the screenshots of what they both said hol on OKAY i found them hehehe the first one is the one that DID offer a publishing deal

and this one below didn’t BUT said very lovely things to me !!

i just blurred out the name of the chapbook sjfjsjdj im not sure if i wanna have that out rn but yeah !!!

i loooooooove poetry i love writing it it’s like the only time i actually allow myself to process my emotions and thoughts? like my writing fiction is escapism and daydreamy but my writing poetry is very cathartic and personal and rooted in My Feelings !! plus, writing poetry is in a way more freeing in that you don’t have to follow all the linguistic rules bc it’s your form and you can do what you want !! but at the same time it can be a lil more daunting for that exact same reason like . there are NO rules so pretty much Everything You Do should serve a purpose !! but yeah i really love writing poetry and talking abt my poems and stuff and :) yeah :D my mom and i were talking the other day and she rly wanted me to like . join a creative writing poetry club or like somewhere where i can talk abt and share my poetry !!! which rly does sound so cool and awesome but like again . Shy . what if i get there and i feel super inferior to everyone else 😭😭😭 what if i get there and they just like . fuckin hate me for idk what reason 😭😭😭 it’s a lot it is stressful i am Tense abt it but i wanna do it sooooo badly omg

hhhhh yeah 💖 i think poetry-writing-me is the most honest/authentic version of me i’ve ever met tbh :p like i’ve always kinda struggled w like my personal identity and like Who I Am bc i usually just like . adapt to ppl and groups and situations as i see fit and i’m typically extremely good at it !! but it makes me tense sometimes bc i know there are things i’m holding back to like . appear more palatable ig? but when i write poetry it’s not like i’m proving myself to anyone or trying to . impress anyone idt like . it’s just for me . it’s like dancing when no one’s watching you!! actually i saw a quote the other day that was like. “who are you in a dark room with no mirrors” or smth and that . punched me right in the gut ngl i was like Damn Who Am I For Real……

but yeah poetry me is like . the closest i’ve felt to that situation !! more so like the stuff i wrote after my poetry classes bc like . i was aware the poems were gonna be read by my peers and my professor so i couldn’t . rly . go into intense detail abt just how Not Okay I Was jdjfksdk my teacher was extremely perceptive as it was like . she clocked me on smth i didn’t think she was gonna notice and then when she directly asked me abt it i remember i literally just. burst into tears sjfjdjdj and then moving forward i like !!! FAKED getting better in a poem like i wrote a whole poem abt how i’d started fixing that issue bc i knew she would see it and i didn’t want her to worry sjfjdjdj but surprise . i was not okay . i was Lying 👀 was being sneaky in a silly goofy mood 💖

my scorpio moon was not fucking around that day she got found out and was like “oh never again” and buried the emotion far far underground 💖

okay i digress and im sure i gave you way more than you anticipated or asked for so . yes 💖 thank you for asking i love talking abt this stuff 💖

[bl1ndbraavosi]

***Neighbourly spoilers below***

Hi Al! The latest chapter really hit me in the feels. I actually cried when Kakashi revealed why he cared so much about the wallet.😭 I was on edge the entire chapter, worried about what was going to happen to the two of them. But like I mentioned earlier, I think you did an incredible job at writing what a loving and healthy relationship looks like for these two and it warmed my heart.

I have a few questions if you're okay with discussing them! Please don't hesitate to ignore any that might reveal spoilers for future chaps :)

Where was Kakashi when she came to drop off his wallet? For awhile, I imagined him going to see ObiRin to talk about his frustrations, but it was raining and late. And I'd love to know how he felt when he realised what she did for him. We already know that Sakura is in love with him, so I'm curious to know if her gesture also brought some strong emotions with it for him and what else he felt.

Does kakashi still think Sakura is materialistic? I remember your recent post on the reasons why Sak is not, but we never got to see if Kakashi came to that realisation, or if he even noticed it later when he calmed down and reflected on the situation. He apologized to Sak for taking his anger out on her, but was he also apologizing for misunderstanding her?

Also, at what point did he begin to forgive Sakura - when he saw his wallet on the counter, or was it before that?

And was the wallet itself also sentimental to Kakashi? I recall Sakura mentioning that it looked old and worn, and so this entire time I thought that it belonged to his dad, I didn't expect what he was most concerned about was what was inside it.

Lastly, and I'm sorry if you already mentioned this before in the previous chapters and I somehow missed it, but will we find out more about how Kakashi's father died?

Once again, brilliant chapter ♥️. That smol dose of Tenzou made it 10x better too 🤭. I am so excited for the christmas arc!!

hi kurious!! i'm so happy to see that their relationship and the way they navigate through problems is coming across healthy and true to character, because it was my biggest concern writing this chapter!! (and yes I love tenzou too he will have at least (1) more appearance before we wrap up hehehehehee)

and ngl the christmas antics start next ch bc i am a christmas FIEND

warning: re Sakumo's death, there are references to depression and suicide below

Where was Kakashi when she came to drop off his wallet?

Short answer: tracing his steps.

The long answer no one needs but I will give anyway:

After he snaps at Sakura, he pretty much immediately feels guilty, which is partially why he hightails it out of her apartment so soon after. The other cause of his haste to leave is his anxiousness to get started on his search. He first double and triple checks his apartment and car, he goes down to the laundromat, he scours the halls, elevators and parking garage to see if he's dropped in along the way to his apartment at some point.

When all that fails, he tries to think of the last time he remembers physically holding it, but in his desperation and panic, he's doubting himself. He's running around to places he's been in the city recently where he may have taken it out, but either they haven't seen it, or they're closed for the day. He actually ends up sleeping in his seldom-used office at the publishing house, his last stop of the night, which was also fruitless, but he's so disappointed and angry at himself that he just can't bring himself to go home for the night, so he passes out on the small couch there.

How does he feel about what Sakura did for him?

I'm going to keep this one simple and vague, because things will come to a head soon in the story, and this is a big part of it, but he is beyond grateful. He can't believe that she's willing to sacrifice her sleep, go way out of her way, and inconvenience herself so greatly for him, especially after what he said to her. He kind of eludes that toward the end of ch 22 when he tells her he doesn't know what he did to deserve her.

Does Kakashi still think Sakura is materialistic?

No. And, honestly, he never truly believed she was, but he was hurt and so he lashed out. The framed vase is his apology for and acknowledgement of speaking out of turn; he recognizes that he was wrong, and he shows her he understands that he was wrong by preserving something that means a lot to her, despite her brushing it off for his sake. For a writer, Kakashi is shockingly bad with words, and he definitely relies on gestures to convey his feelings. Luckily, just as he grows accustomed to Sakura's overt emotional responses, she grows accustomed to his non-verbal communications.

At what point did he begin to forgive Sakura - when he saw his wallet on the counter, or was it before that?

Kakashi doesn't actually feel like there's is anything he needs to forgive Sakura for, because he puts the blame on himself. In his distress, his first response to her brushing off the matter was anger, but the moment he insults her, he feels he's in the wrong. He's just too wound up to admit that or deal with it at the time.

Was the wallet itself also sentimental to Kakashi?

No, he's just a cheap bastard who never replaces anything, which is why Sakura was teasing him about it. She often teases him about things like that (his old couch, his flat pillows, etc.), which is why she didn't really think twice before teasing him about the wallet, too.

Will we find out more about how Kakashi's father died?

No. @birkastan2018 actually asked me this awhile ago, and to reiterate, Sakumo gives up. He just doesn't have the will to live anymore after his wife dies, and he's truly plagued by that sadness until he finds himself in a position to just. Stop.

I may expand more on Kakashi's feelings and how he coped after Sakumo died, but for the purpose of this story, I don't think what triggered his death is as important as the death itself. Kakashi is bitter that his father didn't fight to live. Whether that means he was sick and stopped taking treatment, or that he ended is own life is secondary to the fact that he made a conscious decision to give up.

[astrxlis-archive]

Hello Fox (ღˇᴗˇ)｡o♡ I got so distracted before actually Writing This Down (accidentally scrolled through twitter and whatever stuff besides writing you the reply 😭) I'll reply first to the very very first message i sent you

YOUR JEWELRIES 😳 It is giving Mona⭐ Please attach some pictures when you found the time to do so! I wanna see those~ They aren't just jewelries to me in your description... they sound so fancy it is definitely Monacore! (I do relate with owing someone something too but i like gifts nonetheless as long as they dont make me in their debt ya kno... Paying for food seems wonderful, or maybe even paying for you when you're tight on money)

Thank you so much for the hug 🥰 it's alright, you know how wonky you can be living with mental health struggles? I'd be feeling happy at the moment, but maybe internally not at the same time ♪ Unfortunately, I stopped the meds (but also because my mom doesn't plan to go back anytime yet). I just don't think it's possible to live through drinking it daily or even get used to it since it's too bothersome 😅

Nahida is so radish looking there is no simpler way to describe her. If i could, i'd show her to a kid learning about vegetables. I'll call her the Radish Fairy (affectionately). I think I'm a menace for this ☺️.. I may not be able to purchase merch (f2p even irl), but I sure do hope they make Aranara plushies... they could profit off it so so much! (And give players joy) I wanna suggest to HYV to make a detachable mix-&-match wooden aranara dolls like in the game event~

I'm gonna cry... I wanna try to shorten messages and replies but alright this is the shortest i can go...😆 There's too much to talk about it's crazy 😭

I'm just a c0 kazuha haver^^ Well ya know tighnari will be in standard pool soon so... He might come when you lose your 50/50 (reversed!!) It's almost 2 yrs of me playing the game I still have no diluc 🤣 i'm rooting for tighnari to come home first when i lose 50/50 bye diluc

Ooh heizou! Yes, yes. I love his character! (Doesn't know his story) i love detectives and his design + voice is really perfect.. THE MOLES. He's too smooth and Thank you so much hyv for that ^0^ playstyle wise, it's really not my type, or maybe because after getting him i got a commission to fight the eye of storm (my team during that time includes kazuha, thoma, heizou, & zhongli(he carried with meteor). There is No archer or catalyst user) it was hell... 🤣😭 Happy to say that kazuha, heizou and thoma are friendship 10 now!

CYNO is too cool and good to be true, but i need to skip *cough*. It's more on the aesthetic for me 🥰 may you get him on his rerun!! Mwa mwa I'm still processing how he canonically jokes unfunny or cringe ones (to tighnari) but anyways people will still love him 🤣 it's good to be goofy when your position is serious

Tbh, the studyblr posts i've been seeing aren't really suitable for me and they're more like... good student kind of tips 🤣 idk, maybe i am really stubborn or dislike following things very much (Would read the rules but then do something that breaks it afterwards <- the kind of person i am. Insane) Thank you for your support Fox!! 😭🥰 (it's so weird to say this but..) i'm really grateful for you being with me through all these times! <33 you atleast, have lifted some emotional burdens from me at some times which i am thankful for! 🥰

— 🍰.

hewwooo 🍰!!

i understand the "doing something else instead of what i meant to do" thing 😂 also tumblr pls.

the small earring set really reminded me of mona 😭 the long one actually reminded me of kaeya, and as a kaeya simp, i had to buy them /j i actually waited a week to see if i really wanted them, and i was really happy when i went back to the store and they hadn't been sold~ the pics are up! just ignore the dust lol usually when i can i pay for my friends food hehe small actions of love :')

yeah, i understand that all too well tbh... i can't really comment on the med part because i agree and i'm also struggling with taking my own. they're not for everyone and that's alright. they weren't a good option for me for a long time. but please continue to take care of yourself, ok?

i'm sure the child would say she looks like a radish too pls 😭😭 i would buy the plushies if they sold them....... or at least i'd want to buy bc shipping + currency conversion would cost me a lot............. but dude!!! wooden mix and match aranara dolls!!! that'd be so cute 🥺

i really do hope he'll come home for both of us. if i get another keqing i'm going to cry. also i'd give you my diluc jf i could, but alas jfndjsns i think i somehow summoned him when i bought his skin...... 🙃

dude, how do you raise friendship so fast??? my kazuha is still level 7 and i'm struggling 🫥 but you're right, heizou really has a smooth voice, both in english and chinese. he's benched right now bc my team has only one rotational spot and kazuha's in it lol i can imagine your struggle... that's the downside of having two anemo characters AND the catalyst one is actually a physical one 🥲

there are some leaks that we'll actually get to play the card game cyno plays on 3.3 and i'm slightly excited. a game inside a game. gameception lol i hope we'll get to see tighnari and collei interact with him, especially collei. i don't remember if you mentioned it but is there anyone you'll be skipping him for?

oooohoho, so you're the rebellious type? /j hmm, i remember seeing posts like those too. feels weird when you're neurodivergent, doesn't it? it makes me really happy to read i was able to help you somehow 🥺 i hope i can continue to do so. 💕💕