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makeste · 3 years

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BnHA 326: What’s up Kids, It’s Me, Your Old Pal Stain

Previously on BnHA: Ochako shamed the U.A. Clown Mob into letting Deku go back inside his own fucking school by giving them an hour-long speech about how not to be humongous dickheads. Kouta and Gigantic Fox Lady saved the manga by being the only ones brave enough to give Deku a hug. Shouto was all “man, all this togetherness sure does remind me of that promise you made that we would handle Touya together which you immediately bailed on, doesn’t it, Dad.” Aizawa was all, “for the one and a half people out there who thought that my losing an eye and a leg might actually make me less sexy, I’m very happy to prove you wrong.” All Might was all, “[standing outside the U.A. fortress alone in the rain talking to someone or something??].” Like seriously, what was up with that though.

Today on BnHA: All Might is all “here I am in Kamino having a belated mid-life crisis because Deku abandoned me and I’m a terrible mentor and everything sucks and I hate myself.” Stain is all, “don’t make me come over there and give you a ten page speech about why you’re still the goat while menacingly holding you at swordpoint the entire time” because idk if you knew this guys, but Stain is pretty crazy actually. Anyway so he does that, and then All Might gets all emotional, and then the lady from chapter 92 shows up and gives All Might’s statue an encouraging pep talk, and then Horikoshi is all “and it even stopped raining lol can you believe this shit I’m not even a little bit subtle,” and he really isn’t. But I still got emotional anyway, because seeing people reassure All Might that everything he’s struggled for his entire life hasn’t been in vain just got to me okay. Horikoshi knows I am weak to the All Might feels and he just goes for the jugular every time, that bastard.

lmao. “in the neverending downpour, All Might is...” yeah, thank you, glad we’re getting right to that then

“All Might is driving 95 mph in his busted ass car in the pouring rain, is what he’s doing.” huh

so basically a day or two after his adopted child refused to accept the handmade bento that he packed with love, my man is out here acting like he’s got nothing to live for anymore. this sure bodes well for certain prophecies on which the clock is still ominously ticking down

his fucking face though omg. is it weird that I’m kind of hoping more people ambush him just because I think it’d be funny to see them get their asses kicked like the last bunch

(ETA: or maybe he will just stand there openly not giving a fuck and basically daring them to stab him!! get it together please All Might.)

side note, “anti-hero supporters” is such a strange way of saying “people who hate heroes”, which I’m assuming is what they actually wanted to say?? this makes it sound like it’s a group that really loves antiheroes. “these Hannibal stans have been a real menace lately. time to go deal with them”

ha ha ha, fucking ouch

are you really gonna do it Horikoshi you bastard. are you really going to let that be the final encounter between the two characters whose relationship you once described as the vertical axis of the entire fucking story. are you really gonna?? huh??

huh

you’re telling me you were driving 112 mph and you still didn’t get there in time. you’re losing your touch old man. lol Todo’s ice is almost fully melted already, how late were you

(ETA: so apparently this is taking place after the end of chapter 325, meaning he went to U.A., hung out for a bit, saw the kids come back with his bedraggled half-dead protégé in tow, watched as they shamed the civilians into some long-overdue character development, and then was all “welp, time to go argue with the hero-hating faction or something because I’m feeling useless.” and Edge just let him go, just like that. though to be fair I have to imagine it’s pretty hard to say no to All Fucking Might.)

also belated lol at the fact that the kids were all “yeahhhhhhh we are definitely not gonna touch that thing, let’s just leave it here, he doesn’t need it anyway.” probably the right call to make since they couldn’t get a hazmat team on such short notice

fuck. ha ha ha fucking ouch part two

All Might please put that thing down before you get gangrene. also yeah, you dropped the ball, good for you to acknowledge it. nobody’s perfect and you did your best. but yeah you could have handled a lot of things completely differently. but I still love you

is Horikoshi really putting this flashback here. are you serious. what kind of fucking sadist

look, I swear I’m not one of those people that runs up and down the street shouting “DEATH FLAG!!” at every third panel lol. but this shit screamed Death Flag when we originally got it, and it’s screaming DEATH FLAG!!! even more now. like with the capital letters and exclamation marks and all. and that’s just a fact. I don’t like it but that’s how it is

ffkdjslk

“DID YOU READ THE SIGN??!” Horikoshi asks while zooming in maniacally because he thinks we’re blind or something. lol what

-- though actually, it only just occurred to me that this sign is actually written in English. I never really paid attention up until now and had been assuming it was written in Japanese and translated by the scanlators, but the writing here is clearly part of the original image. anyway so maybe that’s why he’s zooming in?? just to make sure everybody pays attention lol

okay fuck this

see, this is the whole problem right here. once again All Might is all on his own. Deku’s self-destructive angst spiral was fortunately brought to a grinding halt because he actually has support from his friends and family and teachers and classmates. but All Might never had that same kind of support, and it’s made all the difference between the two of them, and not in a good way. Katsuki wasn’t wrong when he said All Might and Deku were both cut from the same cloth. but now when it’s All Might’s turn to go all “I WALK A LONELY ROAD~~” once again, there’s nobody in sight

just, after forty plus years of him carrying this torch, I just wish someone would finally come along to let him know he doesn’t have to. all those things that he wanted to say to Deku are also things that he needs and deserves to hear himself. Aizawa was making a little progress there, but now he’s got his sad zombie cloud boyfriend situation to deal with, and we can’t expect him and his perfect hair to solve all our problems. someone else has gotta step up

oh my god

“you rang?” never mind I take it all back sob

omg why am I laughing. shit

this man truly has the best PR game in the series. we were truly convinced he was gonna suddenly become a good guy and defend All Might against the other villains or some nonsense. as if this wasn’t the same man who decided on a whim that Iida Tensei deserved to be paralyzed, and that his fifteen-year-old brother deserved to die for daring to be upset about it

lol even All Might is all “I genuinely never saw this coming” lmao

just want to say, for the record, I have always harbored a very sensible hatred toward Stain. feeling very vindicated right now. good job Past Me

adsfklwkfsdwgkj

ffffwefjslkg. ghsdlkg. dsfkkkslkjldwkjrg

STAIN: heard you talking shit old man

ME: smh that’s what I thought you’d say you dumb fucking Stain

STAIN: how dare you talk about All Might that way

ME: gljfljgk

(ETA: in hindsight I have no idea how I didn’t clue in sooner that he didn’t recognize him -- or, well, ~didn’t recognize~ him, to be more accurate lol. I think it was the whole “is that a slight against the heroes?” thing that threw me. Viz’s translation makes it much clearer that he’s offended on behalf of All Might specifically, not heroes in general. anyways.)

sob. so All Might is all “yeah I don’t blame you for not recognizing me in this sweet leather jacket”

good thing he still knows how to do this party trick

A+ reflexes on Stain’s part presumably pulling the sword back a few inches to keep this dumbass from impaling himself with his whole pufferfish routine. can you imagine if that was the gruesome death Nighteye foresaw. and he was just too embarrassed to say anything

lol anyways guess I was wrong about Stain everyone

way to fucking go, Past Me. you really biffed this one

oh wait

Stain sure is one wacky rollercoaster ride

oh fuck me lol I forgot how much I did not miss this

(ETA: “this here is the sacred ground where All Might gave up the last of his power and turned into a shriveled old man!! please ignore the part where I admit to knowing all about that, and yet pretend not to recognize said man when he’s standing two feet in front of me.”)

Past Me, I know we’ve had our ups and downs these past ninety seconds, but I’m really starting to think you were on to something. this dude has always been kind of insufferable. always acting like his high horse is a fucking giraffe when it’s actually a Shetland pony

dammit now he’s got All Might going off on a depressed monologue

oh my god my heart

shit

why the fuck does that hit so hard. he became a hero because he couldn’t bear to just sit back and let bad things happen to people who didn’t deserve it. I mean that’s basically the same as every hero ever, right? so why does it still hit so fucking hard every single time though. what is it about seeing someone so determined to stand up for other people and fight on their behalf. it just never loses its impact no matter how many times I see that determination mirrored in so many of my favorite characters

“I wanted to make the world a better place.” omg. but you did, though. like seriously, I feel like people are always dogging on him for not being 100% perfect, and fandom really doesn’t give him enough credit for everything he still managed to accomplish. this man came of age at a time when Japan was by all accounts a total shitshow, and singlehandedly managed to bring about an era of peace that lasted for four fucking decades. can you imagine having peace for that long?? that’s longer than I’ve been alive. shit

and he gave people hope. he inspired them and protected them and made them feel safe. and no, he couldn’t save everyone, because he’s only one fucking dude (and also because the whole time AFO was also out there desperately working to undermine him so that he could keep preaching his narrative of “heroes are bad actually”). but you know what he did do, is inspire multiple new generations of heroes who, if they can all manage to work together, will finally be able to accomplish everything he never could

so yeah. forty years of peace, and inspired the “that’s how we all became the greatest heroes” generation -- that’s a fucking win in my book. talk about having a net positive impact on the world. lol anyways now I’m all fired up and ready to fight anyone who tries to talk any shit about you, All Might

“but what if I talk shit about myself” okay listen up All Might I’m gonna need you to try just a little bit harder to work with me here okay. please calm down and stop blaming yourself for every single bad thing that’s ever happened in the world. do you remember that time Bakugou was blaming himself for Kamino, and you gave him a hug and told him it wasn’t his fault, and that he was only a boy, and that even though he was strong, even strong people can struggle with the burdens they place on themselves, and that you were sorry for not seeing that earlier? do you remember all of that? that’s what I want someone to tell you too, dammit. anyway please stop breaking my heart please and thanks

wtf

are you dead All Might

I don’t even have the slightest idea what’s happening lol

oh snap did he grab him so they could hide??

hold the fucking phone. don’t tell me this person in the background with the umbrella is here to actually do something decent??

oh my godddd

and here come the feels. oh boy. okay don’t mind me, I’m just gonna sit here sobbing over this fictional lady and her simple act of kindness in this weekly shounen manga that I care about way too much

FUCKING DAMMIT AND HERE’S A SECOND HELPING

DON’T MIND ME, I’M JUST GETTING DISPROPORTIONATELY EMOTIONAL OVER THIS WOMAN’S DETERMINATION TO HONOR A MAN WHO SACRIFICED EVERYTHING TO SAVE HER AND COUNTLESS OTHERS. I’M JUST HAVING SOME FEELS OVER HERE ABOUT HER HEARTFELT, DOESN’T-EVEN-KNOW-ANYONE-ELSE-IS-WATCHING FEELINGS OF GRATITUDE THAT COMPELLED HER TO COME OUT HERE AND MAKE THIS SMALL BUT POWERFUL GESTURE. I’M JUST OUT HERE GETTING ALL PROFOUNDLY WORKED UP ABOUT STATUE MAINTENANCE AND THE HUMAN RACE. NEVER MIND. JUST IGNORE ME AND CARRY ON

holy shit. I was not even remotely prepared. you can’t just do that to me. you can’t just leave all these death flags on my lawn and then suddenly shift gears to show me the best of humanity in a chapter where I was expecting the worst. that fucks a person up lol

OH ARE WE STILL GOING

my heart. you see that, All Might. your legacy is so much more powerful and meaningful than you think

...has. has Stain actually been giving All Might a pep talk this entire time

I give up lol. this dude is a fucking enigma

YAYYY

it may just be a metaphor panel, but I’ll take it lol. I missed them. nice to see the traffic light trio front and off-center. I know the whole “this is the story of how we all became the greatest heroes” thing had left some questioning whether certain characters would continue to play a central role in the narrative, and hopefully this will help to ease those concerns just a bit

anyway, so idk if it’s getting a bit chilly down there in hell, but damned if Stain didn’t just give an actual decent fucking speech

I have to say, earlier when I was whining about All Might not having a support squad, I really was not expecting Stain to be the one to come over and pat his head and reassure him that he made the world a better place

-- okay LISTEN

YOU CAN’T JUST COME INTO MY HOUSE AND HIT ME WITH THOSE ALL MIGHT TEARS AGAIN GODDAMMIT THIS ISN’T FAIR. my god. first 317 and now this

holy fucking shit

“I’m just gonna pretend like I haven’t been stalking him for two days and didn’t see the entire Deku bentogate thing go down, and then I’ll give him the whole big speech that I rehearsed, and then I’ll turn around and be all ‘BUT IF YOU’RE A TRUE HERO’, and then I’ll toss him the super-secret AFO wifi password that I stole from Tartarus. god I’m such a badass. fucking give myself chills”

so basically what you’re telling me is that this whole time my “what’s up kids” characterization of Stain from this shitpost has actually been 100% accurate. just want to make sure I’m understanding this right. okay then

“and then I’ll dramatically spin around and be all NOW COME KILL ME BITCH”

it must be so much fun to write Stain. drawing this coked-out maniac who talks like a chatbot that was trained to speak by reading Alan Moore monologues. that must be a trip

anyway so All Might is still crying, the awesome lady from chapter 92 is admiring her handiwork totally oblivious to the batshit insanity going on fifty meters to her right, and it’s finally stopped raining lol

“THE RAIN WAS A METAPHOR YOU SEE” yes, yes, we got it lol. thanks for that Horikoshi. don’t think we needed any help putting the pieces together on that one but I appreciate the effort

so that’s the end! and as I mentioned in another post, I had the count off by one chapter, but next week should be cliffhanger week! so break out your U.A. Traitor bingo cards, friends and fiends. either that or something else happens that I’m completely not expecting at all. which, based on my success rate with Stain predictions, I’d say is more than likely lol

mmm but anyway, so now that the Hug Deku 2021 campaign has finally come to an end, what’s it gonna take to get a hug for my struggling bento-preparing jacket-rocking world-weary death-flag-waving husband who is the worthiest man to ever live and deserves the fucking world, goddammit

#bnha 326 #all might #yagi toshinori #stain (bnha)#bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

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marauderundercover · 3 years

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Making Memories: Ch. 3

Day 3: Chains/Cruelty

AO3

Marinette wasn’t sure how to feel about being chained up, hung from her feet and left to dangle over a vat of acid. She was sure she wasn’t feeling positively about her situation though. Which was a shame, really, because everything else in her life was actually going good for once. She’d been in school for almost two weeks, and she’d made several friends at Gotham Academy. It was such a relief, especially since she’d assumed being a new girl would be awful. But, surprisingly enough, even without the Wayne name attached to her at school, the other students were extremely kind.

But this? This was anything but kind. And she didn’t have an easy escape either. Since starting her official training almost a month ago, her dad had set aside certain nights to be ‘normal vigilante suit’ nights. Which meant she wasn’t transformed. And tonight, though she was kicking herself for it now, she hadn’t even brought a Miraculous with her.

“I didn’t think I was gone that long, but apparently I was wrong. Batsy has a new ward, or are you a new partner? Someone that he’ll actually watch out for in a fight?” Joker asks, finally coming back and grinning at her. She narrows her eyes, keeping her mouth shut tight. She had a lot of negative things to say to the man, more so than the first time she’d met him. The first time, she hadn’t known that she was Bruce Wayne’s daughter. She hadn’t known about the abuse and trauma he had brought to Harley. Hadn’t known that he tortured and killed her brother. But now she did. And she was having a hard time holding her tongue.

“What’s wrong, cat got your tongue?” He asks, smirking.

“Honestly, I don’t have the time for you.” She retorts, hoping he can’t tell she’s panicked. Her eyes are covered by her mask, the same white film that her family has on her mask as well, but her entire body is tense. Marinette wants to fight, she wants to swing out of these chains, but she’s afraid that without her Miraculous (or a grappling hook), she’ll misjudge the distance and fall into the acid. Yeah….that doesn’t sound like a great idea.

“Oh sure you do. After all, you’re just hanging around.” Joker laughs, his laugh echoing across the abandoned warehouse. Marinette frowns at the noise. Yup, this would haunt her dreams.

“Is there a reason I'm hanging upside down?” She asks, starting to feel a little light headed. She runs through possible plans in her head, trying desperately to come up with a way that he would willingly let her move so that she could be rightside up. Cause if she passed out now? It wouldn’t end well for her.

“Is there a reason that Bat hasn’t come for you yet?” He asks, his lip quirking up in amusement. Frowning, she glances towards where her belt should be. The belt that had a tracking device. Of course it was gone.

“I can take you by myself.” She taunts, hoping he’ll let her down so they can test it. So she can run. The Joker laughs loudly, wiping a few tears from his eyes.

“That’s too good. Of course you can’t take me alone. You’re just like the second Robin, so full of hope. So ready to stand behind the Bat and do what he says is right. I wonder, does this birdy bleed as easily?” Joker taunts and Marinette’s stomach drops. She immediately starts thrashing around in the chains. And all she could think was: where’s my dad?

---

Marinette spits out a mouthful of blood, glaring up at the Joker through her tears. The last hit on her jaw had definitely knocked out a tooth or two. She was no longer hanging upside down. Instead, she was chained to a damn chair. He’d knocked her out before she had the chance to escape. And now- she winces as he pulls his hand back and slaps her, trying to catch her attention- now she was stuck.

“Aww, what’s wrong sweety, worried about Batsy?” He asks, and she tenses.

“What did you do to him?” She breathes out and he laughs wildly.

“What is it with you Robins and thinking I did something to him. Why do you never accept the fact that it’s you. It’s all you, dearie. He doesn’t give two shits about you. None of you.” Joker says. She grits her teeth and shakes her head, ignoring the throbbing pain in her head when she moves too fast.

“No. No, you’re wrong.” She insists.

“If I’m wrong, then where is he?” Joker asks.

“He’s looking for me, and when he finds me, he’s going to kick the shit out of you.” She spits out.

“That’s what the second Robin thought too, sweetheart. Didn’t work well for-”

“Stop talking about him!” She screams, finally breaking down. “God, you tortured him you psycho! You hurt him, you hurt him so fucking bad. You don’t get to talk about him now. Not now, not ever. Do you hear me?” She jerks against her restraints, glaring full force at the man. His eyes narrow slightly before his face spreads back into a wide grin.

“I think of myself as a reasonable man,” He starts, walking behind her and out of her sight. The unmistakable sound of metal dragging against the concrete floor leaves her panicking. What weapon had he found? What more was he going to do? Where the hell was the rest of her family?

“But you- little girl- you have pissed me off one too many times tonight. Don’t worry though, this is going to hurt you a lot more than it’s going to hurt me.” He croons joyously. He steps back in front of her and she barely has time to see that he’s holding something before he swings.

“You’re rude-” He says, hitting her in the stomach. She gasps for breath, glancing down at the weapon as he yanks it back. A crowbar. Of course it was a damn crowbar.

“You’re arrogant.” Another hit. “And you have no sense of humor.” Another hit. She cries out, choking back another sob as it does nothing but hurt her more. Letting out a shaky breath, she looks up at him, the area around her right eye throbbing from the earlier hit in the face. She coughs, wincing at the sight of blood and the pain in her sides. She definitely had a couple of broken ribs. And the blood wasn’t a good sign. She gasps in pain as he grabs her chin and forces her to look up at him, her stomach churning at the wicked smile on the man’s face.

“I believe that this is where I leave you, my dear. After all, I didn’t stick around to see Robin’s demise either, and it still happened.” He says with a chuckle. “Trusty bomb or two will make sure the job is finished.” Her breath catches, but she’s too exhausted to panic properly, too in pain.

“He’ll...find...you.” She breathes out, wincing. Joker laughs and shakes his head, his smile almost sad.

“He might. But he won’t do anything about it. I killed a Robin and he did nothing. You? You aren’t a Robin, no matter how much you want to pretend. You are nothing to him. You. Mean. Nothing.” He says, his eyes shining with mirth. He looks at her and quirks an eyebrow before pulling something out of his jacket- something that is quite clearly a bomb. He sets it a few feet away from her before standing and giving one last shrug.

“But who knows, maybe this really will be the thing that breaks the Bat. Maybe he’ll finally give in.” He says, walking towards the door, pausing with his hand on the door handle. “Probably not.” He adds, laughing as he leaves. Her eyes fill with tears as she stares at the bomb several feet ahead of her. A whimper escapes her throat as a countdown starts. She felt so stupid. If only she’d brought Tikki with her. Or Kaalki. Or Plagg.

Even if they couldn’t have helped her out, at least she wouldn’t have to die alone. A bomb wouldn’t hurt the kwami’s, and as selfish as it felt, she didn’t want to be alone. She was...scared. The time of the Miraculous Cure healing everything was over. And now? Now she was about to die. Alone. In an abandoned warehouse. Her heart aches as she thinks of her family, both the vigilantes that were somewhere around Gotham right now, and her parents in Paris. The ones that she hadn’t called today, because she was busy. And she was so sure that it didn’t matter, that she could just call them tomorrow. But now there wouldn’t be a tomorrow.

All the words she ever wanted to say to her family run through her head as she mourns the lost time. She chances a glance at the time on the bomb- 2 minutes left. She chokes back a sob as tears continue to fall down her face. She wasn’t sure who the Miracle box would go to, but she couldn’t give it up. She couldn’t make that decision. She didn’t want to spend her last few minutes scared and confused, not knowing her family, and the Kwami that had become her family. Her heart aches as the clock continues to count down. The numbers racing down at an impossible speed as her last flicker of hope dies out.

As the number falls to 10, she squeezes her eyes shut, not willing to watch the final countdown. The beeping is impossibly loud as she lets out a shaking breath.

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uwuwriting · 4 years

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Shinsou,Dabi and Hawks w/ cheeky s/o

Request: helloo!! may i request dabi, hawks and shinsou’s reaction to their s/o randomly coming up to them, grabbing their hand kissing it and then running away giggling and going “catch meee~” 🥺 - anonymous

So freaking cute omg!!!!! Okay I may or may not have changed it up a bit for Dabi, not much though you’ll see. I hope you like it. Love yaa.💖💖💖

rules

warnings: fluff

Shinsou Hitoshi

-This man...

-Be my husband 2020

-I swear if I don’t get myself a Shinsou you have the okay to kill me.

-Anyways.

-We all know by now that he is so damn soft for you.

-You can be literally doing something really mundane like homework or watching a YouTube video and this man is like “YOU CUTE AS HELL HOW YOU DO DAT?”

-Yeah he’s so damn whipped.

-He tends to wait for you outside 1-A’s classroom either to go get lunch or walk you to your dorm.

-Boy is so sweet and caring I can’t TAKE IT!!

-You got me simping over Shinsou on the daily.

-He has his back to the wall and is just chilling, waiting for you to come out.

-He hears your laugh coming from inside the classroom and he melts!!!!

-His favorite sound in the whole world.

-Then you walk out talking with Mina and Kaminari, laughing hysterically at something Kami said.

-You spot him immediately and run to him, squeezing him into a hug and giving a peck on his cheek.

-He grabs your hand and you make your way to the dorms.

-Your classmates were scattered around the campus so it was only you and him walking to the dorms.

-You were acting overly energetic and cheeky today and he lived for it.

-So, completely out of the blue, you raise his hand and bring it to your lips giving it a small peck before letting it go and sprinting ahead.

- “You gotta catch me Toshi!!!”

-He was dumbfounded at first, mainly because he was overly flustered by your action.

-He snapped out of it quickly and ran after you, catching you in no time and tackling you into the grass.

-You couldn’t stop laughing as you rolled around like toddlers.

- “I think I won more kisses, kitten.”

-He sure did.

-GIVE HIM HIS WELL EARNED KISSES!!!

Dabi

-Another husbando.

-I swear I’m a slut for most of them and yes I am proud of that.

-He loves your kisses especially when they are spontaneous.

-He likes both receiving and giving them.

-No shame™.

-He’s lazy like really lazy so most likely you do it while laying down.

-Being peppered by kisses?

-Yes please.

-Might ruin his reputation if someone found out he becomes mush just from a few kisses.

-Anyhow.

-You two are laying in bed, as you do.

-You are reading a book and he is playing Candy Crush on his phone.

-And since this particular book was quite boring you decide to have some fun with your boyfriend.

-Closing the book you took hold of his arm that was resting on your waist and brought it to your lips.

-You left a trail of feather light kisses from his palm to his shoulder and from there all the way up to his lips.

-He had abandoned the game at this point and had closed his eyes, enjoying your lips on his skin and how much it tickled.

-I swear he almost fell asleep.

-Then your lips were off of him and you were no longer laying next to him.

-You had a small grin on your face, that spark in your eyes dared him to get up.

- “If you want more you’ll have to catch me baby.”

-Oh its on.

-You thought he would hesitate to chase you around the room and hideout if you chose to leave your shared room?

-Ha you were wrong.

-The man was deprived of his kisses.

-He has to gain his kisses back.

- “Wait till I got you doll face.”

Hawks

-Fastest hero at your service.

-Do this to him and he will go APE SHIT IN THIS BITCH.

-Have I ever said how touch starved he is?

-From the way his parents treated him to the cruelty of the hero commission, baby Mac-chicken has gotten no affection whatsoever.

-So when he found you, the light of his world, he would legit nest on you for affection.

-I kid you not you’ll have a grown ass pigeon following you around the house with his arms wrapped tightly around your waist just to get a few extra pecks.

-When he has time to stay at home and well cuddle he will make the most out of it and will prevent YOU from going to work.

-So when you took his hand while you two were watching some Netflix he knew that he was about to either a) get cuddles or b) get a kissing shower.

-And apparently, judging by the small kisses you were leaving in his palm, it was option b.

-But then you stopped and he froze, remote in hand staring at the TV with a startled look on his face.

-Slowly he turned to you and saw your smirk.

-He was about to whine when you kissed him on the lips and leaped out of the couch.

-You sprinted into your shared bedroom, your giggles echoing through the halls as you left behind a really REALLY confused Keigo.

-He got up and went inside the room finding a lump on the bed that was covered with blankets.

-He let out a sigh and went to raise the blankets when you burst through the closet and shout a “CATCH ME IF YOU CAN SLOW POKE!!”

-Confused x2.

-All this turned into a game of hide and seek, with you jumping out of areas Keigo didn’t know you could fit in or even reach.

-When he finally caught you, he was the one to shower you with kisses saying how you were a lively little birdy.

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#shinsou x reader #shinsou fluff #my hero academia shinsou #shinsou x you #shinsou x y/n #dabi #dabi x reader #dabi my hero academia #bnha dabi #dabi x you #dabi x y/n #hawks #hawks x reader #mha hawks #hawks x y/n #hawks x you #bnha x reader #bnha x you #bnha

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dilly-oh · 3 years

Text

Trashy Romance Novel

“Naruto, you frigging idiot,” Iruka began hotly, barging into the hospital room, “of all the stupid, brainless things you could have done, this is by far the-”

He stopped.

The person lying in the small bed was definitely not Naruto. It was a grown-ass man with messy gray hair and a faded scar over one eye, the sterile white sheets pulled up over his nose, apparently sound asleep. Iruka stared at him for a long moment, dumbfounded, before it clicked.

Oh shit, he thought. This is the wrong room. I'm in the wrong room. I need to hurry up and leave before-

The stranger's eyes cracked open and he squinted up at Iruka in confusion.

“...Who're you?” he croaked out. Iruka managed a rather articulate gurgle of dismay, frozen in sheer mortification. He considered the distance between him and the IV drip, wondering if he could dose the man back to unconsciousness before he could scream or buzz for a nurse. “Are those for me?” the man asked, sitting up in bed to regard the bouquet of flowers in Iruka's arms. He opened his mouth to disagree, but then the sheet slipped off the man's face, and Iruka suddenly thought giving him the flowers might not be such a bad idea. He definitely deserved a thank you after gifting him with...that. He didn't even protest as the alarmingly handsome stranger reached out and took the bundle of flowers, opening the card on top.

“You're a dumbass. Love, Iruka.” he read aloud, then looked up at Iruka, batting his eyes. “Aww, babe, you shouldn't have.”

“Whoa whoa WHOA!” Iruka finally blurted out, his face burning half from embarrassment at the situation, half from the thinly-veiled flirting. “I'm sorry, sir, there's been a mistake. I'm in the wrong room and-”

“You mean you aren't my doting husband I tragically forgot about due to amnesia and now you have to win back my love by passionately recreating the story of our romantic union?”

“Excuse me, WHAT-”

“Sorry, I've been reading trashy romance novels. They're the only books this hospital has. Can't blame me for trying.” The man shrugged, then reluctantly handed back the bouquet. “Who's the lucky person they're actually for? Must be someone real special if you're calling them a dumbass to their face.”

“My kid brother,” Iruka explained with a sigh. “He's here with a head injury.”

“Ouch.” The man winced in sympathy. “Poor kid.”

“Not really. He head-butted a brick wall.”

“...May I ask why?”

“Because his stupid boyfriend walked into it and he had to, and I quote, 'defend his honor'.” Iruka paused, looking the man up and down. Despite being a bit on the pale side, he looked perfectly fine, pun very much intended. It was almost unfair how well he pulled off the hospital gown (although Iruka would much rather be the one pulling it off, wink wink, nudge nudge). “So...what're you in for?” His voice dropped to a whisper. “Was...was it the crappy romance novels? Did they rot your brain?”

“I have an extremely rare, aggressive form of cancer with only two weeks left to live and the only cure is a kiss from my one true love...” The man swooned back onto the pillow and looked expectantly up at Iruka, who rolled his eyes.

“Yeah they definitely did-”

“Alright you got me. Broke my leg.” He pulled the sheet off his lower half, revealing his legs, one of which was wrapped in a cast, propped up on some pillows. Several encouraging words from friends were scrawled on the white surface in marker, one of them a jarring green highlighter. It almost hurt Iruka's eyes to look at it.

“...How did you break it?” he asked, unable to contain his curiosity.

“I heroically threw myself in front of a speeding car in order to save the life of my beloved-”

“Okay how did you really break it?”

“Tripped chasing after my pug at the park,” the man admitted with a weary sigh, his shoulders slumping in defeat.

“...Is the dog okay?” Iruka asked after a long pause.

The stranger burst out laughing. It was a nice laugh, warm and contagious enough to elicit a chuckle out of Iruka, who was growing more and more intrigued. He couldn't deny the spark of attraction he felt for the other man, spontaneous as it was, and it seemed to be reciprocated. He didn't even know his name, but something about the man made Iruka want to know more about him. Maybe this was like some trashy romance novel, where the two would-be lovers met under unusual circumstances and fell instantly in-

“Hey, Kakashi,” a man with short brown hair said, suddenly walking into the room, “I brought the next three volumes of your shitty porn series from the hospital library and a couple pairs of clean underwear, so you can stop fucking texting me the specific style and brand you want from home, you're so damn picky-” He stopped dead as he caught sight of Iruka, pausing for a beat, then glanced at the man in the bed, his eyes darting nervously between the two. “Umm...am I...interrupting something?”

A cold pit of ice yawned open in Iruka's stomach.

Oh my GOD. Here he was, borderline flirting with some stranger in a random hospital room, when obviously the man already had a boyfriend and Iruka was just making a complete ass of himself. The flirting had probably been misinterpretation on his part anyway, and if not, the guy was a total dick. Either way, enough was enough. His face aflame with rage and shame, Iruka spun towards the door.

“I need to go.”

“Hey, wait!” Kakashi or whatever his name was called after him.

Iruka was already out the door, ignoring the man's cries. Screw him, and screw Naruto, too. He was the cause of this whole mess. Iruka would just text him later. He was probably making out with Sasuke anyway and wouldn't even notice his brother hadn't popped in to visit. Iruka needed out of this hospital NOW. He turned towards the stairs, immediately got lost, and spent the next five minutes growing increasingly flustered as he stormed through the winding hallways, desperately searching for the exit. Why the fuck was the hospital so damn BIG-

“Hey! Iruka! Hold up!”

Iruka spun around to see Kakashi speeding towards him in a wheelchair, his boyfriend dutifully pushing him down the hallway at a dead run, IV dangling after him on its cord like a faithful dog. The wheelchair stopped with an audible squeal in front of him.

“What- where did- did you steal that?!” Iruka hissed in outrage.

“Of course not, don't be silly,” Kakashi protested, sounding offended. “The guy it belongs to was asleep in his bed. I'm just borrowing it. I'll return it later. Anyway, Iruka-”

“Were you flirting with me in there?” Iruka demanded, cutting him off. “Be honest.”

“Abso-fucking-lutely,” Kakashi said without an ounce of remorse. “So can I have your number or what?” Iruka bristled.

“You're a piece of shit! I can't believe you, hitting on me like this right in front of your boyfriend! You have some nerve-”

“Wait...boyfriend?” Kakashi cocked his head in confusion. “You mean Yams?”

“The fuck do YAMS have to do with anything-”

“Hi, that's me,” the short-haired man said, raising a hand. “Yamato, actually. 'Yams' to my friends. Which is what we are. Just...friends.” Iruka scowled at him suspiciously.

“Friends? Don't fuck with me. You brought him underwear-”

“Really close friends,” Yamato reiterated. “Also, roommates. It's awful. I can't get away from him.” Iruka studied him for a moment, but couldn't spot any hint of deception. The man's almond-shaped eyes were surprisingly honest.

“So you two...aren't dating?” he asked hesitantly. Yamato gave him a horrified look.

“Dear God, NO. Kakashi is the WORST. He's lazy as hell, procrastinates til the last minute, is perpetually late to everything-”

“You are a shit wingman-” Kakashi began.

“He needs to know what he's getting into,” Yamato snapped at him, then turned back to Iruka. “Seriously, though. You should run while you still can. There's hope for you.”

“Don't listen to him,” Kakashi cut in. “I'm a fucking catch. Which is exactly why you should let your flaxen hair down, rip your shirt open to reveal your heaving bosom, and throw yourself into my arms-”

“Will you cut that out?!” Iruka burst out impatiently. “Life is not a trashy romance novel.”

“You sure about that?” Kakashi said, quirking an eyebrow. “Because I met you in a hospital through total coincidence. After really hitting it off, we had a misunderstanding brought on by miscommunication. Then I chased after you in a fucking wheelchair to declare my undying attraction to you. If that isn't a plot to a trashy romance novel, I don't know what the fuck is. At least it's not raining right now.”

“I dunno, it might be drizzling,” Yamato said, glancing at a window.

Iruka paused, considering.

“I guess it...would make a pretty good book,” he admitted quietly. “The only thing is...I'm not sure what happens next.”

“That part's for us to write,” Kakashi said, his tone eager. “Only we can complete the story.”

“Aaaaand I'm going to puke,” Yamato stated.

“Sorry, we crossed the line from 'trashy' into 'sappy'.” Kakashi shook his head. “Anyway. Iruka. Please, I'm begging you. Let me sweep you off your feet. Just...give me a chance.”

“I'll do you one better,” Iruka said after a pause. “I'll give you my number.” Stealing a marker from the nearby nurse's station, he bent and wrote his cell number on Kakashi's cast, then straightened and held out the bouquet. “Here, you can have these. The message works for you too, I guess.”

Kakashi accepted the flowers with a laugh, taking an appreciative sniff.

“And now, I shall ride dramatically off into the sunset,” he said with complete seriousness. “Come, my valiant steed. Awaaaay!”

“I will push you down the stairs,” Yamato grumbled as he spun the wheelchair around and started back down the hallway. Iruka watched them go with a fond smile on his face, giddy with anticipation.

He was eager to read the next few chapters in his life.

Including the steamy bits.

(Written for @kakairu-fest KakaIru Month 2021, Day Twelve Prompt: Hospitals)

#kakairu #KakaIru Month 2021 #hatake kakashi #umino iruka #naruto #hospital au #crappy romance novels #all the cliches

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physicalturian · 4 years

Text

[18+] Words of pleasure - Law x F!Reader - Part 8

[No spoilers] [Modern AU - College AU] [She/her pronouns used for the reader, no physical description; Everyone +18] Words : 6967 Archive of our own

Warning : Power play / Dom/sub Dynamics / Control / Stranger / Flirting / Fluff / Awkwardness / Making out / Anxiety / Oral sex / Exhibtionism… If you feel like I should add more warnings, send me a dm or and ask

– Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7

Halfway through my action, I had to stop. Still on Law’s lap, I looked at him to make sure this was happening. Nodding, he helped me off his lap, tucking his undershirt and shirt back in his pants and putting his belt back on. Part of me was disappointed to only have been able to slide my hands under his shirt and nothing more, but I was a grown woman, and I was not going to be childish about it and pout.

As a grown woman, I was also ready to admit I got a little caught up in the moment, I shouldn’t have rushed it, I was not sure I regretted it fully, but I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach, of slight shame. Turning around, I threw a quick glance to the man who had stepped inside the room in a hurry before looking around. I had seen the huge smile on his face when he looked at Law, then at me, but I was not going to say anything about it. The lesser was said, the lesser I had to be embarrassed about it.

“There’s a meeting, apparently they need the approval of the staff for something, and we have to be there, they said it can’t wait.” Have to, being the key word here. Dusting myself off, I tried to get the wrinkles off my clothes, I hadn’t realized his hands had slid under my shirt at some point but saw how it was slightly risen. “I’ll be there in five minutes.” Law sighed in exasperation, closing his laptop and standing up from his chair, a look of annoyance on his face.

Before the blond man could leave, Law called him, “Cora- get that stupid smile off your face.” He said it in a somewhat threatening way, but I could see the small smile on his lips. Rosinante’s smile only broadened. “Oh no, I’m going to be talking about this for a long time,” He paused in his steps and pointed at the both of us, “This? Amazing, go get some,” he almost tripped on his way out, catching himself before anything regrettable could happen.

When we heard the mute sound of the glass door closing, I moved to grab my bag from the floor but was stopped by a hand holding my forearm. “This wasn’t supposed to happen-“ Law started,

“I know, I know, I just- you looked very attractive like that and I couldn’t help, I’m sorry-“ I was interrupted by the short laugh that escaped his lips while he let go of my arm.

“I mean, the interruption.” He stated, making me open my mouth in understanding as a stupid smile made its way to my lips.

“Oh, right, right… That, yeah, I still got a bit out of hand though…“ I said hesitantly, tightening my grip on the strap of my bag. Law grinned, charmingly if I may say so, and leaned on his desk, arms crossed. “And I did not mind. I was going to stop you at some point, this is my workplace after all,” He seemed to be pondering for a moment, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know when I’ll be done, so you have two options. First one is, you stay here, you behave, and you wait until I’m done,” I widened my eyes at how he worded it, feeling a certain thrill from it. “I could still order some food, if you choose option one, since we don’t have time to go out,”

I was still hung up on the way the word ‘behave’ rolled of his tongue, I hated myself for liking it this much and tried to get myself back on track as he talked about the second choice. “Second one might still involve some waiting, since it’d be you call Nami and see if she can come pick you up,” I was about to tell him I could just walk back to campus and take the next bus, but he told me there’s no way he’d let me walk out of here without being able to make sure I’m safe.

Then he scoffed, “That’s a lie, you’re a grown woman, you could do just that: walk out and get back home. But, maybe I am trying to have you pick option one. I don’t like to leave a work unfinished,” his eyes traveled up and down my body, Law did not even try to hide his leering. Looking down at his desk where his beeper was, he checked it before hanging it at his waist. He pushed himself off the desk and made his way up to me, gently grabbing my chin to make me look up at him.

“What do you say?” As usual, I pushed his hand away from my chin, before doing as he did and grabbing his and have him look at me. “As much as I’d love to stay here, I feel like it’s not legal because there is all your paperwork and shit, and you don’t know what I could do with all that info,” Letting go of him, I shrugged, leaning against the wall, I didn’t say anything more. Perhaps waiting for him to say I was right, I should go, but I think I was more tempted in him telling me that it didn’t matter.

“You’re right,” He hummed before turning around and moving to his desk, I watch him as he cleaned everything up quickly. Putting them in the adequate files before closing his desk drawer and locking it up, making sure his storage cabinets were also locked. “Now, you’re good. As long as you’re behaved, there won’t be any problem. I’m taking a chance here, by letting you stay. Show me I wasn’t wrong leaving you here, if you change your mind and go, send me a text.” He gestured to the seats by the window, with the low table in front of them.

I shuffled to the spot, “Oh no, I had planned on being nosy and rummaging through your stuff, what a shame you locked everything,” I said sarcastically while pulling my laptop out of my bag, along my headset. I heard Law laugh lowly before telling me to have fun, I called out his name quickly once he was by the door, “I’m holding onto that promise of takeout, don’t let me starve doc!” I grinned and gave him a thumbs up, he shook his head in response, a small smile adorning his features.

Once he was out, and I was sure he wasn’t anywhere nearby, I let out a relived sigh and took my phone out to call Nami and tell her everything. While I was acting kind of composed until he had left, I was still feeling warm from being caught making out with him, by his colleague, nonetheless. If it had been Luffy or Nami, I wouldn’t have cared as much, but his colleague? And what was up with me being that desperate? Was I really that into his white coat? Or was it the contrast of his job with how he looked?

Maybe that waiting had me more riled up than I thought. I felt a pull to the man, that I couldn’t explain, perhaps it was his charisma? All he did was flirt with you, bring you food, and be hot, I thought, but then again, what more could I ask for, for a simple one-night stand…. That, sure, was taking too long to happen. While I did say he was whipped, I think I was trying to convince myself. But then again, he did not say he wasn’t, and he cared a lot- before I could overthink any more than I already did, Nami picked up.

“Did he fuck up? Do you need me to pick you up? I’m done, I can come-“ I had to interrupt her, I was expecting her to be ready to throw hands but I couldn’t help but laugh at how ready she was for it. Reassuring her, I told her that nothing bad had happened, it calmed her only slightly. She huffed, then I heard the jingle of keys being dropped on a wooden surface. “You were genuinely about to drive all the way here?” I asked with a huge smile on my face as I plugged in my headset.

“Well yes, I know where he lives, he should be afraid of the power I have with that information by the way,” Laughing, I informed her I wasn’t actually at his place right now but, she asked me if I was still downtown, and I felt a bit shy for a second when I told her I was at the hospital. I did not realize how it sounded when she asked me what had happened. Confused for a moment, I asked her what she meant by that question, then the penny dropped. “Oh god no, no, nothing bad happened! I had finished my classes earlier, so I came by his work to wait. Turns out, I’ll have to wait a bit longer,” I told her.

When she mumbled in understanding, I continued and slowly brought the topic of what had happened earlier. Her reaction was mixt, she seemed thrilled that it was going well, but still was not fond of the man, her excitement won when she asked me if he was a good kisser. “Nams, I think the important info to remember is that we got interrupted-“ she clicked her tongue against her teeth, saying it wasn’t important, “You’re still there, right? You’ll get railed, don’t worry, the interruption only adds some action to all of this!” She said enthusiastically.

Rolling my eyes, I scoffed jokingly, “Well, I don’t want action, I want to fuck and maybe see if I like him, I don’t need drama. Just, casual sex,” Nami told me to shut up that I was just spurring bullshit, “Casual, casual, what you’re doing is everything but casual babe. You’d have to be blind to not see there’s something between the two of you. And it’s weird, right? Because you’ve known each other for…” She started counting under her breath before saying, “Not long,” Chuckling at that, I hummed thoughtfully.

“You’re right, it’s rushed, should I just come back and tell him we should take things slow?” I asked, a bit lost, I don’t know why it was happening so fast. I appreciated him, I knew things about him, yet I felt like there was an invisible wall separating us. I did not mind, after all we started all this just to have sex, maybe that wall was a blessing, and it’ll help me not get caught up in… whatever this was.

“Oh no girl, you’re getting laid, and only once you’ve gotten laid will I be accepting you back in the apartment!” In the back I heard Robin say that it didn’t work like that, that if I came knocking during the night while Nami was asleep, she’d let me in. Nami tried to argue back, it was all in good fun and in the end, I know that my ginger friend did not mind letting me back in if things didn’t go as planned.

We kept talking a bit longer, she hyped me to keep doing what I was doing. One of her arguments being that he had money and he was always going to pay the food, which was only an added bonus to how attractive he was. I deviated the conversation to her and Vivi, which made her softer and cooled her curiosity about my situation.

After a while, we hang up and I focused on my work. I had to use the hospital’s guest wi-fi, which was a bit too slow and limited my use for my research, but I managed to do things anyway. Feeling out of place in this room, I tried my best to not spread my stuff around. I had my bag closed right next to me, with a book opened on the low table and my laptop on my lap. I felt too aware of each of my action, thinking that anyone could come in the room and kick me out, or just give me a weird look when they’d see that Law wasn’t here.

I kept my back as straight as possible; it was hard because every now and then, I’d want to sit in a more comfortable position; There were no pillows to support my back, and the seat was pretty uncomfortable, it took all the restraint in the world for me to not sit tailor-style and finally be comfortable. Time went by without me being aware of it, it’s only when I was startled by a light being turned on above my head that I noticed it was pitch dark outside.

Sliding the headset off my head, having it now resting around my neck, I turned my head towards the door and let out a short breath in surprise. With a small smile, I thanked Law as he stepped inside his office, “You shouldn’t work in the dark, you’ll fuck your eyes up like that.” He said with a smile as he shrugged off his coat and hung it on the hook by the door before rolling his sleeves up. I had to force myself to look away, fixing my gaze back on my screen.

“I hadn’t realized it was this late,” Putting a hand on my stomach, I made a pondering face, “Although it explains why my stomach’s empty, I did eat a few snacks while working but it’s clearly not enough,” I said out loud as I saved my file and turned off my computer, putting it back in my bag, carefully placing it so that nothing would hit it too roughly. Scoffing, I saw Law grab something from his desk before going to the bathroom and coming out of it with his earrings dangling from his lobes.

Pursing my lips, I tried not to laugh but he saw it and asked me what was wrong with me. “Nothing it’s just,” understanding he was getting ready to go, I stood up and threw my bag over my shoulder, “It’s cute how, even though we’re going back to your place, you’re putting on your earrings. It’s just- the trip there isn’t that long, no one is going to see it,” Quirking a brow, he didn’t answer right away and first put on his black coat. He shoved his hands in his pockets to check for the keys and wallet, his eyes never leaving mine.

“It’s not for the people that I’m wearing them, I just like the earrings. They were a gift, it feels off when I’m not wearing them, is that a good answer?” He said with a strained smile, I felt my cheeks warm up. I felt stupid for assuming anything and felt slightly bad for having had him tell me the story behind it, sure it wasn’t much, but I could have kept my mouth shut and he wouldn’t have given me that… awkward smile. “I didn’t mean to pry, but it suits you, that’s for sure.” I said with a nudge, lifting up the mood. I wasn’t sure it had even gone sour, but I made sure we were on the same page.

Opening the door of his office, Law grabbed the cap from the coat-hanger, he was only going to put it on once he was outside. “Well, you are biased, but I’ll take the compliment,” He grinned, gesturing me with his head to go to the elevator. Following him, I scoffed, “How am I biased? Visually, it looks good, you know? With some perspective and all that,” Pulling me towards him when I was about to bump into someone, he kept me close by when we were in the elevator.

We were stacked inside such a tight space it felt stuffed. I shoved my free hand in my pocket and put on a fake smile when my eyes could meet those of the other people in the elevator. I tensed when I felt Law’s breath behind my ear, he was standing right behind me and was keeping me close, a hand on my hip. “Biased because you find me attractive,” I shook my head, and looked at him over my shoulder, whispering back, “I do, you are handsome, that doesn’t mean the earrings don’t suit you. It only makes you look even more cute,” I felt bolder from not facing him straight on, but I could still see the slight blush on his cheeks.

He leaned back, his back hitting the wall of the elevator, his hand on my hip only tightened I didn’t say anything, but found it entertaining to know he reacted as such when given genuine compliments. “Doctor Law! I didn’t know you had a girlfriend- oh and what a cute couple you two are, you know, I was talking about it with my husband earlier that we never saw you with anyone by your side, he’ll be glad to know you’re not as hopeless as he thought you were! He was dead set on setting you up with his friend’s grand-daughter-“ The old man that had started a one-sided conversation with Law got interrupted by the nurse next to him who gave us a short smile.

She told him that he shouldn’t bother Law since clearly he had finished his shift and was on his way to leave; Law laughed politely, “You can tell Eliott that I’m fine, he shouldn’t worry about me. I can only hope to be as lucky as you are to be with him,” He said, that same polite smile adorning his features.

The old man gave me a look, almost asking me to speak, so I threaded carefully. When I saw the door open, I slid my hand inside Law’s and grinned at the old man in the wheelchair, “Well, we have to get going, any time I spend with this guy is gold- yup, and I’m, a gold digger?” I kept the weird face I wanted to make, to myself and instead followed Law’s footsteps out of the elevator, bidding goodbye to the confused old man.

When we were out, we made our way in silence to the car, Law let go of me and looked at me confused, “What did that even mean?” His voice wasn’t angry, nor was it happy, I didn’t know what he was thinking. He had the faintest frown on his face, which gave me the impression that he was mad but did not let it get to me.

“I don’t know, I panicked! I’m bad at improvising, I wanted to be all poetic you know? Like, you have little free time, so it’s rare, like gold and- it came out so, so bad, I am truly sorry about that.” I confessed while struggling to put on my seatbelt. My hands were shaking from the feeling of being put on the spot when the old man had talked to us. It felt like stage fright, but there was no show, and I was no actress. Perhaps I could try my best to be one, and act like I did not care of what the man had said but there was pride swelling inside me as I recalled he had said we made a great couple.

The black-haired man stared at me for a moment before bursting out laughing, he helped me with my seatbelt, leaning in close, “Well, you’ve embarrassed yourself by saying you’re a gold digger. At least I know what Mr. Coldwater will be talking about with his husband for the next few days.” When my seatbelt was fastened, Law did not lean back on his seat. Instead, he looked at me a little longer, his eyes darting to my lips before smirking.

I thought he was going to pull away like he did when he had coffee together and was surprised when he placed a hand on my cheek and brought my lips to his. I don’t think either of us cared that this was getting hot so fast, it was slow and deep kisses, his hand that previously was holding the wheel tightly, moved to cradle my face closer. At this moment I realized how touch starved we both were, craving that intimacy we hadn’t had in too long. I pulled him closer by his tie only to be tutted in a reprimanding way as he broke the kiss.

“You really want to take my clothes off, I’m getting worried you only want me for the sex,” he said jokingly, removing my hand from his tie and straightening it back in place as he fastened his seatbelt, giving me a side glance. “No, you’re right, I am also using you for the free food, I should have made that clearer,” I matched his attitude, giving him my best smirk, which only made him roll his eyes as he started the car.

“You are truly living that gold digger life, or is it more the sugar baby life? I can hardly tell the difference,” A strained laugh escaped my lips when I heard his words, looking at him, astonished, there was still the beginning of a smile on my face.

“Hey, come on, you’re the one offering and I never refuse great offers. I’m quite the opportunist, doc,” Humming, I felt my body flush with warmth and opened the window to get some fresh air. I looked outside, watching the flash colors of the city passing by as we drove on the highway. I was about to get lost in my thoughts when Law spoke loudly, so that I could hear above the sound of the wind.

I faced him when he started talking, “Then I shall find an offer you can’t refuse, how about,” he trailed off, making me think he was pondering what to say next but from the smug smile on his face, he knew already what he wanted to say. “I get to enjoy some too, you’ve been enjoying free food for a while now, it’s only fair I get a taste,” His eyes left the road for half a second, looking at me up and down. My brows furrowed as I tried to understand what he meant; I was coming to a conclusion but the silence from my side must have been too long when he explained himself.

“You’re the food, and I want to eat you out.”

An audible “Ah,” left my mouth, I stared at him for a moment, the radio playing at a very low volume was all we could hear along the loud wind in the background. Sliding the window shut, I nodded to myself, Law couldn’t see it for he was focused on the road. “Well, as I said… I can’t refuse a great offer, it sounds great to me, yep…” I smacked my lips, not expecting that at all and yet I was unable to ignore the excitement that started to build inside me.

“Perfect, until then, how about we order Chinese?” He then proceeded to tell me about the restaurant that wasn’t far from his place, and we then spent time trying to find what we wanted on the app. I had to read out loud most of the plates there was on the menu since Law couldn’t look at them himself. When we had chosen what we wanted, I called the place and told them our order. They said it would take about an hour since it was rush hour and they had a lot of customers right now.

The rest of the drive we chatted as if he had not just plainly told me he wanted to eat me out. I appreciated it, a deal was a deal, no need to mention it again until the right moment. While we did not mention it again, it was still very present in the back of my mind and I couldn’t wait until we were at his place to get things going. I felt like this was the longest I had to wait to get laid, but from what he keeps telling me, he’s good, and it’ll be worth it.

I brought up the topic of his clumsy blond friend, and it made him smile a little albeit the rolling of his eyes. “He’s… a family friend, helped raise me, he’s great but don’t tell him I said that. He needs to get the love toned down,” He said softly, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. We were driving straight ahead, so it was pretty quiet. Even more so at this time of the day.

“Not to be that person, but are we there yet?” I asked him a bit shyly, I did feel like a child who had been promised a nice treat. But I was no child, and the treat was entirely different than what a child would expect. “We are, can you hold on five more minutes? Or do you really want to jump me that bad?” I laughed loudly in response, resting my elbow against the car door and leaning my head on my fist. “Oh babe, I can wait, I was curious because, thanks to you, I haven’t eaten and I’m getting car sick alright?” I huffed, focusing on the horizon with a frown.

His humorous attitude turned into concern when he asked me if I was okay, I told him that as long as I get to have a bite of something, anything really, when we got to his place, I’d survive. “I should have gotten us something to snack on before leaving, it was stupid of me,” he sighed. I turned around and looked at him in confusion, putting a hand on his shoulder, “I was kidding when I said it was because of you. I should have prepared something don’t worry, you’re good, I’m good and alive too, I just hope you have bread at your place,” I finished with a smile, sitting back properly on my seat, hoping he’d stop blaming himself.

Something in the back of my head sensed a certain familiarity in the way he was acting; Kind of like the man who made sure I’d eat and drink after… Shaking my head, I looked back at the road, making sure to ignore my thought. We weren’t on the highway anymore; we were driving through a fairly rich neighbor. Not the richest, but the housing did look very good. A lot of white houses and grey/white buildings too, “I do have food, yes, I also have to eat you know? I am human after all,” He said with a smug smile. I rolled my eyes, “Damn I thought you sparkled under the sun, here lies my hopes and dreams.” I sighed in faux-despair, I then met his eyes, “The more you know, right?” I added.

His smug smile disappeared to let an exhausted playful one adorn his face, he did not say anything else. After a while, we arrived, and he parked his car in the underground parking lot of the building before leading us to the elevator. His place was on the eleventh floor, which made the ride there only more painful. “I think we spent too much time on elevators today,” I stated. Law huffed, giving me a weird look, “And I think we’re lucky to be alone in this one, or would you prefer to be pressed against me in a crowded one?” I bit the inside of my cheek and threw him a glance, considering his suggestion.

The unsaid suggestion being: ‘shall we make out in the empty elevator?’, I think. “If you want me so bad, maybe you should come closer, see what happens? I promise I don’t bite.” I told him with a smirk, he was at the opposite of me, his arms crossed on his chest with his cap still covering his head. Grinning, he shook his head. “It’s cute, you’re trying to take control. Trying, being the key word. But you see, if I give you a taste right now, you won’t be able to behave until I fucked you properly.” He said dryly, only giving me a side glance before continuing, “We don’t want that, do we?” He smiled, approaching slowly, his arms falling to his side.

He gently placed a hand on my cheek, I had a hard time keeping my reactions to myself. There was an unspoken battle of who would break first, and I had shown the first cracks by getting on his lap and initiating a making out session. Fortunately, I was brought back to reality when we got interrupted but with how he looked at me right now, I don’t think I could hold back a lot longer. “We wouldn’t want that, no,” I mirrored his smile, my hand sliding to his pants and pulling him closer by the belt. A surprised huff escaped his lips, turning his smirk into a strained expression.

We stared at one another, daring the other to make another move. It was like playing Jenga but without the wooden blocks, without the support of the table, without the joyful laugh and angry screams of stress, but the tension was somewhat the same. Taking from the other to add more and more, trying to make each other tip. Trying our hardest to win by having the other succumb first, their composure crumbling like the wooden tower. If you showed one ounce of weakness, trembling hands, shivers, short breath, you’d be done for. And I knew full well I had lost long ago, yet we still entertained the idea.

Our staring contest was cut short by the ‘ding’ the elevator made when we arrived on the eleventh floor. “Looks like it’s our stop,” I grinned, pushing him away gently as I pushed myself off the wall and gripped my bag tight. “I was going to lead the way, but I don’t know which one is yours so,” I stepped to the side and let him walk in front of me, “Guide me,”

He chuckled and pulled the keys from his pockets, his pace fast in front of me. He stopped in front of a door and unlocked it, I followed and did as he did, removed my shoes at the entrance. When I was about to follow him further inside the place, I was stopped, “Wait here, I need to check something first,” with that he was gone, and I was left standing in the middle of the hall. I put my bag on the cabinet by the door and did not move. I still tried to look around, the place was open. To my left was the kitchen, it looked big enough for… creative activities.

On the right there was the living room, with the dining room close by. No walls separated anything, which made the room very vast. Law had entered a room right ahead from the entrance, he closed it behind and stayed there a few minutes before coming out with a pair of sweatpants and a long-sleeved black shirt he had rolled the sleeves of. He seemed a lot more comfortable than he had been in his slack pants, tight belt, tie and dress shirt. Looking at me, he grinned and approached me close.

“By ‘wait here’ I meant, not follow me. But you stayed right…” He dragged the word, his eyes trailing on my form, “…there, you did not move an inch. You are obedient after all,” I looked at him with wide eyes, my cheeks warming up by the second. I don’t know what he meant by that, but I took his words as a permission for me to move. I walked past him and made my way to the kitchen, “I’m hungry above anything else,” I heard him say that I should make myself at home, so I did. I started making myself a sandwich while still talking, “And you said I should wait, so I waited, it’s not my place so I wasn’t going to take a look around, no matter how tempting it is.”

I explained before taking a bite and groaning at how great it felt to finally eat after a long day. I did not miss Law when he joined me in the kitchen and handed me a glass a water, saying that if I was going to eat so fast, I might as well not choke. I thanked him, then kept eating in silence until he spoke up, “You said no matter how tempting it is, do tell me what you’re curious about. I’ll give you a tour, not that we weren’t going to do that anyway,” I quirked a brow, asking him if he really meant to give me a tour in the first place.

“Well, not in those circumstances. I’d have had you on all the furniture, moaning, but by the end we’d have done it in all the rooms.” He did not falter once while delivering that line, his back resting against the countertop, his head only half-turned towards me as his eyes were looking at nothing. He was imagining it, a smile on his face. My mouth too dry when I swallowed, I started choking and quickly took a sip of water. Law looked at me with a look that said, ‘I told you so’, so I scoffed. “It’s your fault if I’m choking, don’t give me that look doc.”

He shook his head, “That’s not how I choke, but you can blame me for having you so flustered you lost the use of your mouth,” I sighed loudly at his words, but the smile on my face betrayed the fake-annoyance I put up. If he kept that up, my tower of restrain would collapse, he was too good with words. I tried to taunt him, tease him perhaps, in the elevator but utterly failed. And here he was, simply standing next to me, but having me hot and bothered by the snap of his fingers.

“If you don’t answer, I’ll think you’ve really choked, maybe I should help you out,” He drawled, his hand grabbing my wrist gently as he pulled me towards him. He placed himself behind me, my back against his chest. I let him move me as he pleased, curious of what he’d do, and did not say anything. You know what they said, if you don’t have anything sexy to say, don’t say anything, or something like that.

I felt his other hand slowly travel the length of my body, from the side of my thigh to my hip, to my sides to finally rest on my shoulder. His hand delicately moved to rest under my chin, lifting it from under, barely holding my neck. “Tell me to stop and I’ll stop,” he whispered into my ear before letting go of my hand to rest a hand on my stomach, just under my chest. I breathed out, ‘Keep going,’ but could barely hear it myself. I felt him huff a laugh as his finger gently graze against my throat.

“Something’s keeping you from talking, so I should help, right?” He continued, his hand leaving my neck to join his other one on my stomach. His lips moved to where his hand was on my neck and ghosted my skin as he spoke. “The trick is to put the thumb right here,” He clicked his tongue against his teeth and chuckled, “We can’t really see much like that, can we? Here,” he raised my shirt, and to not have to hold it he told me to keep the hem between my teeth. I tried to lean my head back on his shoulder, but he said I should watch and learn.

“You put your fist right there, the other hand above it and you pull it up,” Instead of pulling up, he moved both of his hands right under my breasts, tracing oh so slowly. His mouth soon joined as he pressed kisses on the back of my neck, I laughed lightly at the tickling sensation of his hair on my skin. “Don’t move or I’ll stop,” he said in a low tone. His hands had started traveling down my body, but I stopped him and pulled away from him, “Stop what? You’ve barely done anything, we could stop everything right now and it wouldn’t change a thing-“ With an annoyed sigh, he pulled me closer once more, this time he did not lose time and took my shirt off.

I raised my arm to help him, if he initiated it like that, I could still claim to not have lost. He had caved in first, and I had barely done anything for it to happen. “You talk too much, and moan so little. I’d like to change that,” he was about to help me on the countertop when I smirked and pushed him away once more. “Not here to fight you, but if you plan of fucking me properly, I’d like for it to happen in a proper bed too.” With another annoyed huff, he led me to his room but did not bother closing the door. Instead, he made me wrap my hands around his shoulders, his were resting on my hips as he guided me to the bed.

I fell my back first on it as he let go of me and looked down at me with a wide grin. “Hopefully you didn’t forget my offer,” he asked rhetorically before leaning over the bed and helping me out of my clothes slowly, the excitement coursing through my body made my hands tremble a little as I tried to help me out, but he told me, “Keep your hands to yourself or I might have to tie you up,” while I knew he said it jokingly, I couldn’t help but found some thrill into it. I did not tell him I’d be into it, just like I did not tell him I dreamt of him in the most sinful ways.

Instead, I scoffed, I don’t know where I found the attitude. I felt completely exposed while he was still fully dressed, I could however see the growing bulge in his pants and grinned before meeting his gaze. “My hands could be helping you too, you know,” His lips pulled into a smirk, he grabbed my ankles and put my legs over his shoulders as he knelt on the bed, between my legs. “I think they’ll fit better here,” he let go of my legs and placed both my hands in his hair.

Without any warning, he dipped his head between my legs and starting working, my breath hitched in my throat as I let my head fall back. He started slow, painfully so, his tongue feeling strange at first but slowly growing into a pleasing sensation. It was enjoyable but not yet a bliss, I had yet to be gripping his hair in pleasure and must have noticed and stopped for a moment. His hands slithered from knees to the higher spot on my thighs, “Do you want to make this a bit more fun?” He asked, after having wiped his chin on my thigh.

I nodded, he told me to try again, I furrowed my brows a moment then cleared my dry throat, “Yes, what do you have in mind?” I asked, he then instructed for me to grab the headboard tightly and not let go. If I did, he’d stop. If I wanted to stop, I’d have to hit his back with my heel. I liked that, it was kind of like… discipline… When I agreed, he went back to work, except this time, he used his hands too. While one finger was playing with my clit, his mouth was licking, sucking, his tongue lapping at my lower lips, another one was thrusting inside and out of me.

At some point, he looked up at me and grinned widely, his eyes darted to where my hands were gripping the headboard with all my strength. I was panting, high pitched moans escaping my lips without any shame. He grazed his teeth against my skin and met my gaze as if to ask if he could go one, I told him he could go ahead and then felt a stinging pain of his teeth sinking in my skin enough to feel some pain but not to spill some blood. I tried to keep my mouth shut to muffle the louder moan that was going to escape but was only reprimanded in return. “Where’s the fun in covering up those pretty sounds?” He stopped everything and leaned over me, a hand on my chin to open my mouth.

“See, if it can open like that, why not use it to let me enjoy those moans of yours, hm?” A lazy smile on my lips, I wanted to do what he did to me: grab his chin back and maybe slap his hand away but I felt like I had to keep holding the headboard. “I’ll make a note of that, so keep going if you want to hear more of it, hm?” I mimicked his tone, only to be met with a taunting smile.

“It’s cute, you’re still following the game of not letting go of the bed, but you’re talking back. Guess we’ll have to make you scream louder, hopefully you won’t mind,” I could feel my whole body warming up, upon hearing his words. He then gripped the hem of his shirt with both his hands before removing it, I suddenly felt a shiver ran down my body and looked up at him.

“Oh god you’re-“

[Part 9]

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surlybobbies · 4 years

Text

deancas AU, 2.4k, T

[It’s a mini pride & prejudice AU if you squint. this is only on tumblr for now, just a rough thing to tide you over until my bakery AU is finished. some light tws: discussion of sexual harassment, implied homophobia. it’s a happy ending, though, dw.]

-----

Cas met Sam’s brother at a company mixer.

“I threatened to change my Netflix password if he didn’t come,” Sam said surreptitiously to Cas, casting a look at Dean, sitting a distance away at the bar. “He thinks we’re all stuffy assholes, so I figured he could see for himself.”

Cas was both stuffy and an asshole, but he didn’t mention that. “Well, I hope he has a nice time,” he said.

Sam clapped a hand on Cas’s shoulder. “Thanks, dude, I appreciate that.”

Cas lingered on the outskirts of his party for the next hour or so. Some well-meaning coworkers drew him into bland conversation, but for the most part, Cas was left alone. He found, however, that his gaze kept being drawn to Dean Winchester, whose mouth kept doing sinful things to a beer bottle. Sometimes - though maybe Cas was imagining it - Dean’s eyes would find Cas’s gaze and linger.

A few minutes after Cas’s second beer of the night, Sam found Cas again. “Hey,” Sam said, looking at Cas curiously. “Garth mentioned that you own this place?”

Cas shrugged, a little embarrassed. “My father left it to me. I leave most of the management to others, but I stop by on the weekends to sign off on the bigger things.”

“So that’s how we got such a huge discount,” Sam said. “Thanks, dude. That’s nice of you.”

Cas was not hurting for money, and asshole or not, he’d wanted to do something nice for his colleagues. “Please don’t mention it,” he said, and meant it.

Sam’s smile was wide. He was about to reply, but a commotion by the bar stole their focus. One of Sam and Cas’s colleagues was in Dean’s face, a fist wound back behind his head in an obvious threat. Dean was still on his stool, his hands still cradling his beer bottle on the bar counter, but his chin was raised defiantly toward the other man.

“Shit,” Sam said faintly.

“If you’ll excuse me,” Cas murmured to Sam. He began winding his way through the crowd. By the time he got to the bar, security had already wrestled the other man’s raised fist behind his back and were dragging him - yelling and struggling - toward the exit, leaving Dean to stare after them.

“Should I be concerned?” Cas said, once he got close enough.

Dean’s eyes flicked over Cas’s tie and button down dismissively. “Nah,” he said, taking a swig from his bottle and looking away. “Doesn’t concern you.”

Cas sat on the stool to Dean’s left. “I own this place,” he said, and hoped Dean wouldn’t think it was a brag. “I think it does concern me.”

Dean’s eyebrows rose. A corner of his mouth lifted in mock amusement. He swung his body to face Cas a little more. “Then tell me what you’re doing to keep the ladies tending bar from being harassed by dumbasses like the guy who was just about to knock the skull off my spine.”

Cas looked at Tori behind the bar, who’d been eavesdropping.

She shrugged. “It happens, Cas,” she said. “Part of the job.”

Dean snorted. “‘Specially around these parts, with these stuffy business types who make way too much money for their own good. Think they own anyone who can’t afford a porsche.”

Tori looked sad.

Cas caught her eye. “Tori, may I speak to you in the back?”

Dean was looking at him with hard eyes. “Gonna fire her for what I did?”

Cas was taken aback. “Of course not. I wanted her opinion.” He stepped away from Dean. “Thank you for standing up for her.”

Dean just rolled his eyes and turned away, lifting his bottle to his mouth.

Tori was waiting for Cas in the back. She was a young mom working her way through her degree. She was also one of Cas’s hardest workers.

“He’s good,” Tori said immediately, correctly guessing one of Cas’s questions. “He heard the other guy being an asshole and decided he didn’t want to hear more.”

Cas was still troubled. “You said harassment was part of the job. It shouldn’t be.”

Tori frowned. “I’m a girl behind a bar serving men their alcohol,” she said, as if that were enough of an explanation. “Harassment is part of the job. Doesn’t matter what you think.”

“You still deserve respect,” Cas said, hurt. “You and the others.”

“Duh,” Tori said. “But if you kick out one creep, another one takes his place.”

“I don’t understand,” Cas said, genuinely confused. “Are you suggesting I get used to the idea that my employees get harassed on a regular basis?”

“You were fine with it before.”

Cas’s face burned in shame. “I - I had no idea. I didn’t - I didn’t think.”

Tori shrugged. Not my problem, she seemed to say with her shoulders.

“Would it help to have security stationed near the bar?”

Tori smiled a little bit. “Can we sic ‘em on creeps any time we want?”

“If that would help,” Cas said. “Would it?”

Tori’s eyes were soft. “A little bit.” She offered Cas a smile. “People call you an asshole, but you’re really not.”

Cas frowned. “Don’t tell people that.”

Tori laughed. Cas sincerely hoped her night would get better.

Suddenly, Cas remembered the green-eyed man sitting at the bar. “Also,” he added, “If you could put Dean’s drinks on my tab?”

Tori’s smile was kind. “Whatever you say, boss,” she said. She gave an awkward little wave before returning to her station.

Cas lingered in the back for a while, not wanting to return to socializing, and especially not wanting to catch Dean’s eye and see that spark of derision in them. Cas was comfortable with his reputation as a stuffy asshole, but something about the narrow-eyed way Dean had looked at him made Cas’s chest tight.

A few minutes later he escaped from the back room and slunk toward the front door, eyes on the ground, refusing eye contact with anybody. It was only when he was outside, approaching his car, that he could breathe easy.

But then he heard a voice call out from behind him.

“Hey! You! Cas!”

Cas turned around. It was Dean. He was wearing flannel and jeans. He looked warm despite his breath rising up as fog in front of him. “Dean,” Cas greeted. His heart thudded a little faster.

“You know my name,” Dean said suspiciously.

“Your brother,” Cas explained. “He said he threatened to take away your Netflix privileges if you didn’t come.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “That’s a lie. He wanted me to play wingman for him, but he did just fine on his own.”

“If you’re talking about Eileen, they’ve been dancing around each other for months.”

“That’s the one,” Dean said. “They’re in there giggling over margaritas. I think Tori’s a little too generous with the tequila tonight.”

Cas stomped his feet in the cold. “I’m glad they’re enjoying themselves regardless.”

“Yeah.” Dean looked at the ground. “Speaking of drinks,” he said awkwardly, “thanks for the freebies.”

“The least I could do,” Cas said, waving away his thanks. “You succeeded where I’ve apparently failed in keeping my employees comfortable.”

“Tori said you’re gonna hire more security?”

“I only hope it actually helps.”

“Just ask her next time,” Dean suggested.

“I will,” Cas assured him. “I’ll also make copies of security tapes so leadership can review what happened with my colleague. Hopefully he won’t be my colleague for much longer.”

Dean smiled at him. It was a nice smile, the first Cas had seen from him.

Cas looked at the keys in his hands, swallowing down his helpless, hopeless attraction to Dean. “Well, I better - “

Dean interrupted him. He stepped closer and looked at Cas significantly. “You wanna get out of here?”

From up close, Cas could see the gentle laugh lines around Dean’s eyes. The stubborn set of Dean’s jaw was gone, replaced by a hopeful, lopsided grin.

“What do you mean?” Cas asked, confused. There was no way Dean was hitting on him, right?

Dean rubbed a hand over his chin. “I can’t compete with a whole-ass bar, but my apartment’s pretty sweet. Got some damn good coffee too, if I may say so myself.” He jerked a thumb to his right. “I’ll drive. Swear I only had the one beer.”

Cas looked over his shoulder at his own car. He knew it’d be fine where it was - potentially even until morning. He looked back at Dean and pocketed his keys. “Coffee sounds great,” he said.

----

They had coffee in Dean’s apartment, sitting at Dean’s dining table and chatting. Dean’s laughter came easier when he was at home and at ease, and Cas found himself leaning closer and closer with every sip of coffee, eager for Dean’s next smile.

At the end of the night, after Cas turned down Dean’s offer for another cup of coffee, Dean leaned in and kissed Cas goodbye, his hand warm on Cas’s face. The kiss eventually led to another kiss, and another, and another, until Dean suggested Cas stay the night instead. He was unbuttoning Cas’s shirt when he suggested it, and Cas could think of nothing better in that moment, so he canceled his rideshare with one hand before dropping his phone on the carpet and ridding Dean of his shirt.

In the morning, Dean brought Cas coffee in bed.

----

“Thanks for letting Dean stick around, by the way,” Sam said one Friday, a few months later. Cas’s coworkers had made Cas’s bar the setting for their biweekly get-togethers. “I know there was that issue a few months ago with Cole.” Cole was their now-former dickbag colleague.

Cas looked at the bar, where Dean was chatting with Tori. “Of course,” he said. “I’m just glad he likes it here.”

“I’m surprised, to be honest,” Sam said. “He usually can’t stand being around business types.”

Cas hid a smile and didn’t respond.

It was a few minutes later that there was a commotion by the bar. Cas had hired more security, but there were still a few bust-ups that couldn’t be prevented - especially when Dean was at the bar.

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose when he saw who was at the center of the ruckus.

Cas sighed and wound his way through the crowd. Luckily security was already there, though they hadn’t yet removed anyone.

“Problem?” he asked.

The man in Dean’s face was seething. “This your boyfriend?” he mocked.

“The owner, actually,” Cas said, standing next to Dean and surreptitiously grabbing the back of his jacket. “But yes, also his boyfriend.”

The man’s face turned red. He had a suit on and smelled like he’d bathed in cologne. “Should have known this place was - “

Security was hauling the guy out of the bar before he could finish - fortunately, too, because Dean had lunged forward at the man’s last comment.

“Alright,” Cas soothed, gripping Dean’s arm. “He’s gone. Please stop picking fights in my bar, by the way.”

“I’m getting rid of the assholes for you,” Dean said, scowling. He settled back onto his stool and turned back to his beer.

“And I’m trying to prevent lawsuits and hospital bills.”

Dean rolled his eyes, but his lips lifted. “Whatever. You gonna buy me a drink or what?”

“You haven’t paid for a beer in this place for four months.”

Dean looked impressed. “Four months? How’d I manage that?”

He’d managed it just by being him: by standing up for people who couldn’t do it for themselves, by making Cas laugh, by holding Cas accountable, by loving Cas for the past four months despite his flaws. Cas said none of this, though, instead choosing to lean in and whisper something very different in Dean’s ear - something that left Dean with ruddy cheeks and a pleased smirk on his lips.

“Oh, yeah?” Dean asked, looking at Cas through his eyelashes. “Should have told me earlier, Cas. I’m angling for the whole bar next.”

The thing was, Cas could see it happening: Dean by his side as they looked at billing, at inventory, at staffing. Dean keeping Cas grounded as Cas took a more active role in ownership. But Cas said none of this either. “I’m looking forward to seeing you try,” he challenged instead, before leaning in to swipe Dean’s beer from his hand.

Dean watched Cas drink his beer with a scowl. “Stealing shouldn’t be so hot, but somehow you manage it.”

Cas ran a slow hand over Dean’s back. He was just about to lean in and whisper something else, but they were interrupted by someone behind them clearing his throat.

They looked over their shoulder and saw Sam with a sour look on his face.

He looked pointedly at the lack of space between them, then at the hand Cas had low on Dean’s back. “This a new thing or what?”

Dean turned around. He had a new bottle of beer in his hand, courtesy of Tori. “Hey, Sammy,” he greeted. He jerked a thumb at Cas. “You know Cas?”

“We’ve worked together for the past three years,” Sam seethed.

“What a coincidence,” Dean said, feigning surprise. “Cas, did you know this?”

Cas ignored him. “We’ve been seeing each other for four months,” he said to Sam apologetically. “I was waiting for Dean to tell you.”

Dean grinned at his brother. “Surprise.”

“Shut up,” Sam snapped. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me.”

“And I can’t believe you actually changed your Netflix password,” Dean accused.

Sam sighed. “I shared it with Eileen.”

Dean’s mouth dropped open. “You what?”

Cas interrupted before Dean started another argument. “Sam, your drinks are on me tonight,” he said. “I hope we can get to know each other better.”

Sam was glaring at Dean, but he shook Cas’s hand anyway. “Thanks, Cas. Take care of my brother, will you? He’s an idiot, but he’s okay most of the time.” He made a face at Dean one more time before leaving.

Dean was looking at Cas carefully. “You okay with this?” he asked.

“With what?”

“Dating me,” Dean clarified. “Being around me. Being seen with me.”

They weren’t big on public displays of affection, but Cas figured Dean needed it at that moment; he touched Dean’s face and tried not to get too sappy about the way Dean kissed his palm. “I’d spend every minute with you if I could,” Cas said earnestly. “But unfortunately work and sleep get in the way.”

Dean rolled his eyes but Cas saw the set of his mouth, the pink of his cheeks, and knew he was pleased. Dean reached forward and fixed Cas’s tie. “You wouldn’t happen to have a Netflix account, would you?” he asked.

#deancas #destiel #deancas fic #destiel fic #kc fic #strangers to lovers #au #sam doesn't know

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127-mile · 3 years

Text

Bots and books.

Pairing: Artificial intelligence Ten x female reader.

Genre: AI, bookstore | Fluff, angst.

Warnings: Ten thinks robots are superior to humans.

Plot: When your boss asked you to train the new employee, you didn’t think you would end up with a robot freshly out of the factory.

Word count: +5.3k.

A/N: This is part of the AI project #14320 collab hosted by @pastelsicheng.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

When you hear Taeil's voice behind you, you drop the book you were holding, and when it crashes on your foot, you pursed your lips so as not to be vulgar when so many customers are in the store. "Oh boy, I'm sorry, I should have warned you that I was here." Taeil whispers, and when you look over your shoulder, you notice that he doesn't look embarrassed by the situation, or ashamed, on the contrary, he looks amused.

"I feel like you are trying to hurt me, am I wrong?" you ask, squinting, and he shrugs. At least he bends down to pick up the book and put it where it was supposed to go. "Maybe I'm just trying to get you to go home because you're spending too much time here, maybe I didn't do it on purpose, who knows." If he wasn't your boss, you would have insulted him, but you care about your job, and you like being able to pay your rent every month without having to ask your parents for help.

“I don't spend too much time here, I even think that I don't spend enough time here. But getting back to what caused you to come bother me, yes we can talk. What do you want?" you turn completely towards him, and you tilt your head to the side. "We're going to have a new employee tomorrow, and I was wondering if you could take care of him, show him how the bookstore works, show him how to use the cash register, you know, everything that I taught you when I hired you."

"Aren't you supposed to take care of it, as the boss?" you ask, and he takes his hands out of the pockets of his pants when a client approaches, he smiles at her, and when she disappears, he regains his slumped position. "Are you listening when I'm talking to you?" you know it's a rhetorical question and yet you shake your head, you're not going to lie, you tend to stop listening when he talks for too long. Can he blame you? He has a soft voice that lulls you to sleep.

"I vividly remember telling you last week that I had to go away for a few days. I have an appointment in another city for my next book." oh yes, you remember hearing him mention a new book, an appointment with his publisher, and other people who might help him, but you don't remember hearing him mention the date, or how long he would be gone. "Am I going to have to spend weeks putting books away with your head on the cover? I better get a raise for that!"

"Why would you get a raise, you should be happy to see my face on books!" you could tell him that yes, it's an honor to work with a famous writer, but you don't want to give him that pleasure. "So if I have to take care of the new employee, does that mean that I will also be the boss until you come back from your vacation?"

"It's not a vacation," he mumbles, and you smirk, it's so easy to annoy Taeil, and that's why you like him so much. "but yes, you will be in charge of the store until I return. So are you okay with that?" you know you don't have a choice, that you are the only person working here that he trusts enough to entrust his shop, his baby. "Of course I agree! I won't miss an opportunity to turn a new employee against you."

"Maybe I'll take this opportunity away from the store to find a new employee, to replace you. I've had enough of you!" you're very happy that customers are around, otherwise he certainly would have shouted to sound more dramatic. "You can't fire me, because I'll ruin your business, and you love me way too much, you'll be bored without me. Do I also need to remind you that you wouldn't have a manuscript for your editor to read if I hadn't been there to force you to write?"

Rather than respond, Taeil walks away muttering something between clenched teeth, and if a client wasn't calling for your help to find a book, you most likely would have laughed at his behavior.

Night has fallen for an hour or so when you finally lock the bookstore door behind you, and when the cold wind caresses your cheeks, you sigh deeply. You like this place, it's a bit of a second home for you, but good god, you want to be at home, even if you have to deal with your roommates' antics until you fall asleep.

"Excuse me?"

Your blood freeze in your body, you should have checked that no one was around the store when you went out, because Taeil is already gone, and he won't be there to help you if a drunken idiot, or a little too pushy keeps you from coming home. You take a deep breath, but it hitches in your throat when you turn on your heels. "Can I help you?" you ask in a voice that you hope is not too shaky.

The young man stays silent for a while, and you frown when he tilts his head a little too slowly not to look like a killer straight out of the horror movies you love so much. You clear your throat, and he seems to take notice of the question put to him, so he nods, extending a hand to you. "You dropped that." in his hand, you see the notebook that you always keep in your bag, bag that you have thrown over your shoulder without even taking the time to close it.

The lump that had formed in your throat is disappearing as quickly as it came, and you refrain from sighing in relief. "Oh, thank you very much!" you take the notebook that you put in your bag before closing the zip. "Thank you?" the young man answers, but before you can open your mouth he walks away from the shop.

You happen to meet strange people, but this is the first time you've met someone like him, someone who seems surprised to have been thanked for something as mundane as returning a notebook. Taeil would say that this is a person's first life on earth. Him and his writer mind.

Even though the stranger didn't look dangerous, you make sure he got far enough away to walk in the direction of the stairs leading to the underground metro. If you're not a fan of this place, you like being there at this late hour, because it's not so crowded, and it's easy for you to find a seat in the metro. You push your headphones into your ears, and you look up at the screen near the sliding door.

You roll your eyes when you see the ads for LSM going on. If you were to earn $10 every time you saw it on TV, or heard it on the radio, you would have enough to pay your rent for at least six months without needing to work. This really isn't an exaggeration, the company really wants everyone to know about what they are offering, new updates on their bots, and how excited they are to have sent the most of their new robots in the world for work, for study, or for entertainment.

You have nothing against robots, you just think it's a shame to take jobs from people who genuinely need to work, but apparently: "robots aren't here to replace you, they're here to make it easier for you. Do not be scared, technology is good, we need it." You're not sure if you're okay with that, and you'll let it know when the robots take over the world.

Lost in your thoughts, you almost forget to get up to get out of the metro, these damn robots will end up making you miss your stop. Yes, sometimes it's much easier to blame the robots than it is to accept your responsibilities.

"Johnny, if you don't get out of the bathroom in a minute, I swear to god I'll make you swallow your camera!"

you growl, and you open your eyes. Why do you always have to wake up regretting all the decisions that brought you here, living with two roommates who are ready to tear their heads off at the first opportunity offered to them. "And I'll make you eat your books back if you do that!" you hear Johnny respond, and you wonder why the neighbors haven't filed a noise complaint yet. You would have done it since day one.

"Doyoung, you don't work Saturdays, why are you already up?" you ask in a voice loud enough to be heard, and what you didn't want to happen happens. The door opens, and your gaze meets Doyoung's, he has furrowed brows and dark circles, since when has he not slept? "For your information, young lady, I would be sleeping if Johnny hadn't knocked on my door at six in the morning to ask me for the time!"

"Not that I want to stand up for him, but you looked for it by setting his alarm clock to go off at five the other day." you answer, and he rolls his eyes as he walks into your room to drop into the bed, and you groan when his back blocks your legs. "Doyoung, I have to go to work, so if you could move that would be very nice." he doesn't move, and you wiggle your legs until you can free one. "As soon as I convince Taeil to give me a raise, I'll find myself another apartment and I won't have to deal with you anymore." you mumble, and Doyoung chuckles.

"Even if he agreed to give you a raise, which he won't do until he has published two more books, you won't leave. You don't like silence, and you will miss us too much after the first day." he's not wrong, but you could always find a new roommate. "It's okay, I'll find someone else. Someone who doesn't make me want to throw myself out the window every morning."

"If you need help finding a new roommate, ask us, we'll be happy to help." you sigh when you hear Johnny, and when you turn your head, you roll your eyes. Johnny is in the doorframe, a towel hanging low around his hips, and drops of water falling from his hair. "We'll find you someone good. Or someone worse than us, Doyoung and I will have to talk about it before we decide."

Before Doyoung can react, you free your second leg, grab your clothes for the day, and head to the bathroom, not without pushing Johnny out of the way. "Y/n, I'll make you eat your fucking books!" Doyoung growls as he straightens up, and you laugh. You know he can do it, but before that, he'll take the time to find the worst book in your book shelves to do it, so you'll have plenty of time to run away, change your identity and be forgotten.

You need less time than Johnny to shower, and to be ready to go. When you come out of the bathroom, you notice that the two boys are still in your room, and they are chatting as if they hadn't threatened each other less than twenty minutes ago. "Are you going to stay in my bed? Don't you have bedrooms, or a couch where you can talk?" Doyoung looks up, and he smirks. "Your bed is much more comfortable. We're talking about what to do with this room when you're gone." little shit.

"Well, since I'm apparently the only one working here, I'm going to go. See you tonight, or never." you get your bag that you throw on your shoulder and you stick your tongue out at Johnny who waves to you without moving from your bed, the sheets are going to be damp because of him, and you want to hit him for that, but that might make you late for work.

You leave the apartment, and like the day before, you quickly find the stairs leading to the underground metro, and unlike yesterday, it's more difficult to find your way through the students, workers and partygoers who have just returned from a party the night before. You concentrate on your breathing to avoid letting yourself be overwhelmed by the different smells of perfume, sweat, and alcohol.

When the doors slide open, you quickly get out of the train, and you find the outside. You never thought you would miss the clean air as much as since you started taking the subway to work. Since Taeil is away, the shop is still closed, and it takes you at least five minutes to find the keys in your bag, and for a second, you wonder if you haven't left them at home, but you sigh with relief when your fingers come in contact with the cold surface of a key.

You unlock the door, and walk into the store smiling at the familiar scent of old books piling up in part of the store. When you started working here, you asked Taeil what the old books were for, that they would never be sold, but now you see the charm of the old book with the damaged binding, the sound of the pages, and you wouldn't do without them. You put your bag on the counter, and you turn on the lights.

Taeil must have gone to the store before leaving, because you can find the boxes already behind the counter. You could have taken care of the delivery, but Taeil likes to check that everything is there, even if he might be late for an appointment that could really change his writing life, even if in your opinion, he is already quite popular and doesn't need more help.

You sit up when you hear the door open, and you open your mouth. "We're not open yet, sorry." you say, and if you expected the door to close, it stays open, and when you look at the person, your eyes open wide. This is the man who gave you your notebook back last night, and once again, he tilts his head far too slowly not to be awkward to watch.

“I'm LC27296,” he begins, but he shakes his head with a certain vigor that you would never have at this time of the morning. "I'm Ten, I'm going to work here." your mouth opens, but no sound comes out. For a minute, you forgot that you were supposed to take care of the new employee. "Taeil told me to come before the opening to make it easier." oh he did that?

"Before I introduce myself, I have a question for you. What were you doing here last night?" you ask and he suddenly seems nervous. "I- I didn't mean to scare you, I just wanted to make sure of how long it would take me to get here, so that I wouldn't be late for my first day." you hum, not sure you believe it, but it's not like you can accuse him of something without having any proof whatsoever. "Alright. I'm Y/n, I'll take care of teaching you how the store works until Taeil comes back in a few days. You can shut the door."

Ten does, and he approaches the counter, he doesn't seem in his element, but if Taeil hired him it's because he saw something in him. "Why did you give me numbers when I asked you for your name?" you suddenly ask, curious.

"Oh! It's my serial number, but I was told I had to introduce myself with my name, it makes it easier to fit in." a serial number, what the hell? You frown as you take your phone from the pocket of your jacket, and you open up the conversation with Taeil.

To Taeil: A serial number, what's wrong with the guy you hired?

Taeil must still be in the car, or on the train, since the answer is not long in coming. You shouldn't ignore Ten, but you need an answer before you decide whether you want to be locked up with a stranger all day, or not.

From Taeil: Ten is a robot. LSM sent me a letter a few weeks ago asking if I wanted to take any of them, and I said yes.

To Taeil: And you didn't find it useful to tell me that I was going to have to train a robot? And besides, aren't they already programmed to know how to do everything, why should I waste my time training him? Is this your way of telling me that I'm fired and that you will only hire bots from now on?

You don't get a response, which shouldn't surprise you, so you put your phone on the counter, and you meet Ten's gaze, who hasn't moved an inch. Did he himself on pause while you were busy? "So you are a robot?" you ask in a small voice, and he nods. "Yeah, you didn't know?" honestly no, even though LSM has some amazing quality robots you would expect to see them with bolts and metal.

"It's my first day away from the factory, and I'm very happy to be here!" he adds, and you roll your eyes, if he's happy that's the main thing, but you're not sure you are. "You can think of me as a human being like any other, no need to make a difference because I am superior to you." you gasp at him, but you can't help but smile, stunned. "Just because you're made of metal doesn't mean you're superior to us. I'm sure if I throw water at you you'll rust and stop working, so in a way, I'm superior."

"You can try, but it won't work! That would be stupid to think we fear water, or fire, or anything for that matter, right?" oh, it might get hectic if he continues. "How about I show you how the store works? Because if we talk any longer, I might look for other ways to turn you off, and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you?" he shakes his head, a worried look on his face. Perfect.

You're going to have a serious conversation with Taeil, you think, showing him where the books go, how the cash register works, and where the storeroom is, storeroom that is also used as a rest room.

"For starters, you're going to go to the storeroom, and you're going to sort all the books alphabetically while sorting them by genre, can you do that, oh you superior robot?" you ask, tilting your head, and he shrugs his shoulders. "Of course I can do it!" Taeil never asked that the books in the storeroom to be sorted, since most are unsold books that will be donated to associations or the city library, but you don't want to have him in your legs when the first customers arrive.

You take your phone, and you send one last message to Taeil before turning on the light in the storefront indicating that the store is open.

To Taeil: This robot is an idiot, and if he pisses me off too much, I'm going to fire him whether you like it or not.

To make sure you don't receive an answer, you turn off your phone before throwing it in your bag before starting to put away the new books. And surprisingly, the morning goes off without a hitch. Ten comes out once or twice to ask you for advice on an unfamiliar book, the few customers who come in don't need your help, so that's nice.

When the time comes to close the shop for the next two hours, you enter the storeroom. Ten is sitting on the ground, and he's surrounded by books that should have been put away for a long time now, but the robot seems way too deep in reading to do the job you asked him to do. You frown. "Do you know that reading is not part of your contract?"

Ten doesn't react, he just turns the page and laughs at something he just read. "Taeil buys LSM magazines, I'll go check if I can't find an article on how to deactivate a robot if it becomes threatening." you say, and immediately Ten lifts his head to look at you. "But I'm not threatening!" he exclaims, like a petulant child would.

He may be a robot, but he has typically human reactions, which is strange in itself. At least for you. "They won't have to know when I throw your body in front of the factory you came from." you answer in a slow voice, and Ten finds himself on his feet, not without slipping a bookmark in his book so as not to lose his progress. "Sorry, I found this book, and it's so interesting I couldn't help myself."

You look at the title, and you smirk. You hide in the storeroom when you don't feel like coming home, and it's one of the books you've read. "If you don't want me to tell you who the killer is, you're going to finish putting those books away, and then I'll give you time to read until the store closes tonight, do we have a deal?"

He mumbles something between his teeth, but ends up nodding. You walk away from the room before remembering that you had a question for him, so you go back. "Do robots eat?" you wouldn't want to deprive him of his lunch break and end up with some sort of robots protection squad on your back for mistreatment. "Yes, we eat. I told you, we are like you."

"It's break time so you'll finish tidying up later." Ten passes over a pyramid of books, and he leaves the room, not without taking his book with him. "So, what are we going to eat?" he suddenly asks, and you want to take his book and hit yourself with it. "What do you mean, we?"

"Taeil told me you would take me out to eat with you so I wouldn't be alone in the store." Taeil should remember to tell you when he decides something, because you can't continue to be surprised every time he opens his mouth. "Did he say that?" a nod. "Great. I'm going home to eat, so I think you're going to meet the two most annoying people on this planet after you."

He squeals with delight and you roll your eyes as you pick up your bag. You exit the store by locking the door behind Ten, and you head for the subway train. "I love meeting new humans, you are all so fascinating!" you wonder what can be fascinating about humans, but for a robot, everything has to be. "What fascinates you so much about us?" you ask going down the stairs, being careful that Ten keeps following you, you don't feel like looking for a lost robot in the streets.

"We can feel emotions, but they're programmed for us, so it's not as real as when you feel them." human emotions are difficult to understand, humans are confusing. "I think it's pretty nice to be programmed to feel certain things, it's probably easier, less confusing."

"You're wrong," Ten starts to say, following you in the subway, he sits next to you not without looking at a little dog with stars in his eyes, as if he had never seen a dog in real life, so much so that you wonder if there are robot dogs, you'll have to ask him one of these days. "We're forced to feel the emotions, so we don't understand them. Being programmed doesn't mean we understand what's going on."

It's pretty sad, you think.

"Do you have a program that allows you to kill us if we becomes threatening for you?" you ask in a low voice so as not to attract the attention of the students around you. Ten's eyes widen and he chuckles. "No, we can't do that. We're not here to hurt you, just to help you." it's a shame, you would have needed it with Johnny and Doyoung.

"This is where we come down." Ten follows you to the door of your apartment. You can smell Doyoung's food already. He might be annoying, but when he's not working he always makes a snack for you for when you come home from work during the break, and that's very nice. "I live with two people, Johnny and Doyoung, they can be weird, and they might ask you tons of questions, so be prepared."

When you put your hand on the doorknob, Ten puts his hand on your wrist to stop you. "Wait, wait. Are they going to hurt me? Some humans can be mean when in the company of a robot." oh, he didn't sound so nervous earlier, but in a way you can understand that. "They're not mean, and they're quite fascinated by LSM's robots, so you have nothing to worry about, they won't do anything to you."

You open the door when he seems to be relaxing, and you sigh when you hear the loud voices that most likely come from the kitchen. "Johnny, how many times have I told you not to set foot in my kitchen? You're a walking hazard, you'll manage to set some water on fire if you wanted to! Get out!"

"Guys, I'm here. And I'm not alone, so if you could behave like normal people that would be really nice." you say and immediately Johnny's head pops out of the kitchen door jamb and you roll your eyes. "Oh hello mister stranger, who are you, are you our beloved Y/n's secret boyfriend?"

"I-" Ten seems unable to speak, and Johnny throws his head back when he notices the blush on Ten's cheeks as he lowers his head. "Oh, he's blushing! Adorable! He's in love but he hasn't had the courage to tell her yet. Doyoung, come see!" you should have known that they were going to mess with him. You should have warned them before you got home, threatened them, or promised to pay for the next pizza night.

"Shut up, big idiot! He's the new bookstore employee, we met this morning." you respond by swinging your bag in a corner of the apartment after removing your shoes. Ten does the same, and he follows you into the living room. You're pointing your index finger at the boys. "Johnny, Doyoung, this is Ten. He works with me."

"Oh, I didn't know Taeil was okay with hiring bots." Doyoung says, stunned. "How do you know it's a robot?" were you the only one who didn't have a clue? The only one that can't tell the difference between a robot and a human?

"It shows! And he's got LSM's name tattooed behind his ear." You'll have to go see the ophthalmologist to get glasses, because you didn't notice the black ink behind his ear. "Taeil didn't really hire me, it's just a contract for a couple of months to see how quickly I adapt to a new environment. Next time I'll be in a new place." oh, that's a detail you didn't know either, you thought Ten was here for good, at least until you got fired, or left.

"And can't you ask to stay at the bookstore for good?" you ask, sitting down in a chair, and Ten shrugs. "Why, have you already become attached to me? You refuse to see me go?" you could get up and hit him, but you don't want to break your fist if he is made of metal inside. "I said that because I wouldn't say no to less hours of work, dont think I appreciate you."

"She never introduced anyone to us, even casual employees, so you must be special." Johnny says winking at Ten, and you refrain from leaning over the table to hit him. "Taeil asked me to take care of him, what was I supposed to do, lock him in the storeroom with a piece of bread and a glass of water?"

"That's what you would have done with us, so yeah." he's not wrong, that's what you would have done if you had had Johnny and/or Doyoung as a colleague. "Anyway, we don't have all day, so if you could just leave Ten alone so we can eat." you mumble, but Ten shakes his head, apparently he doesn't mind being the center of attention. At least he knows that emotion, and he understands it, that's a good thing.

When it's time to go back to work, you almost have to pull Ten out of the apartment. "But why? I was having fun with your roommates!" of course he was having fun. "You can come back and see them if you want." you answer by going down the stairs. You have a little over thirty minutes left before you have to open the store, so rather than locking yourself in a subway train, you decide to walk.

"Really, you would let me come back?" you shrug your shoulders. "Why wouldn't I want to?" Ten plays with the hem of his hoodie, and you frown, he doesn't look like the type to be surprised or even slightly nervous over something as futil. "Because I wasn't very nice to you when I arrived this morning. But like I told you, some humans don't want us to fit in and want to harm us, and I heard so many stories that I defended myself if you ever decided to be like them."

"I don't understand robots, I don't understand LSM's motivation, but that doesn't mean I would hurt any of you. You should have waited, and you would have known it."

"I'm sorry Y/n, and I promise I'll do my job well until the end of my contract!" he exclaims, his smile back on his face. His beautiful face, moreover, you did not miss this detail. "I hope so, otherwise I won't give you time to read before closing." he gasps, but he laughs, and you have no choice but to laugh with him.

#nct #wayv #nct imagines #nct scenarios #wayv imagines #wayv scenarios #ten imagines #ten scenarios

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undyingskies · 4 years

Text

Days Like This

request: yes, Okay so I’ve never asked anyone to right a fic before butttt I was wondering if you could do one were you’ve had depression for years and you haven’t told anyone even Owen your boyfriend and after it getting really you breakup with him because you don’t want him seeing you like that and somehow he finds out and comes over and takes care of you even though you don’t want to do anything

A/N: I hope you guys enjoy!

Warning: Depression is mentioned in this. Please remember that if you are feeling this way you are never alone and you are not weak if you ask for help! Take care of yourself, you deserve it!

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It’s just a bad day, just one bad day, you constantly repeat to yourself in your head. You can feel the numbing feeling taking over your body and your breathing getting shallow.

You don’t want to feel like this, but it happens. You try to fight it because you don’t like the feeling or how it drags you down for days. There’s no shame of feeling this way or dealing with depression, it’s just hard to manage sometimes. Especially because you keep it to yourself, the only people that know is your mom and best friend.

You liked it that way, keeping it to yourself meant it affected less people and didn’t make people treat you differently. It seems like anytime someone hears you struggle with depression they start to act different and you didn’t like that. You didn’t like that at all.

You’ve been in bed for a few days now, just trying to tell yourself that it’s just a bad day, each day. But the bad day has now turned into three and it doesn’t feel like you’re escaping this feeling anymore.

When you get like this, you tend to block most people out. Your phone is too overwhelming and interacting with people just feels draining. You know it’s not the healthiest to block people out when you start to feel like this but healthy coping mechanisms is something you’re still working on, it’s a process. Nothing to be ashamed of you remind yourself.

The problem now is the fact that you’ve been blocking out Owen, your boyfriend. The two of you have been dating for about 6 months now, and you still haven’t brought up the fact that you deal with depression and depressive episodes.

It’s not like you didn’t want to tell him but it never felt like the time, especially because the last few months you’ve been doing really well. You’ve been going to therapy and practicing the healthy coping mechanisms your therapist was teaching you. You believed that maybe you wouldn’t have to tell Owen because you were doing so well.

Here you are though, a new wave of tears coming over you. You knew you weren’t doing well now. You just wanted to be alone.

As that thought makes its way through your mind a knock on your door pulls you from it. You hoped that if you didn’t move, the person would go away. You were wrong, the knocking just got louder and faster.

“Y/N, I know you’re in there.” You can hear Owen yell as he knocked a few more times.

You force yourself out of bed, wiping away the stray tears on your face before you make your way to the door. You open the door slightly, your body blocking Owen from coming in.

“What do you want Owen?” You ask him already feeling exhausted from the interaction. You just weren’t up for this.

“What do you mean, what do I want? It’s been three days and I haven’t heard anything from you!” Owen almost yells, you can see and hear the frustration coming off of him.

Logically you understand why he’s upset, anyone would be. But right now you can’t handle it.

“It’s nothing Owen, I’m fine. Please just go away. I will talk to you later.” You say while going to close the door, but his hand stops you from shutting it all the way.

“That’s not gonna cut it Y/N, you don’t get to ignore me, tell me you’re fine, and then just close the door in my face.” He tells you. “Just let me in, please.” He goes from yelling to almost whispering. You can see the sadness and confusion on his face.

“No, Owen. You just need to leave, I need my space, okay?” You yell back to him. You just want time to yourself right now, normally you’d be aware of how harsh you’re being but right now it doesn’t seem to matter to you.

“You can’t just shut me out like this for no reason Y/N, what’s going on?” He asks.

“Nothing is going on Owen, please just go away.” You tell him again.

“I’m not just going away like that Y/N. I’m worried about you. You’re my girlfriend and I want to be here for you.”

“Ya know what Owen? I’m not your girlfriend anymore so goodbye.” You tell him, anger seeping through you.

The look of sadness on his face almost breaks that anger. He’s hurt, really hurt. You close the door on him before he can get another word out.

The door closes and realization hits you. Tears stream down your face as your words replay in your head. You know you weren’t thinking rationally, fighting right now was just too much for you. You just wanted him to go away and apparently you were ready to say whatever it took to make him do that.

That feeling of exhaustion taking over you, you make your way to your couch and flop onto it. You let your tears fall from you for a while longer before sleep takes over you.

It feels like you slept forever when knocks on your door wake you up. You turn and look at your clock it’s 11 PM. The last time you remember looking at the clock it was light outside and not even 1 PM yet, you really did sleep forever.

You had what you called a depression nap, where you’re just so tired from your intrusive thoughts and all those overwhelming feelings, you sleep for almost the whole day, sometimes longer.

It’s weird that someone is knocking on your door so late but you still make your way to the door. You stand on your toes to look through your peep hole, you’re met with blue eyes and blonde hair. Your heart skips a beat for a second.

You open the door slightly again; you just stick your head through to look at him.

“Hi.”

“Hi Owen.”

Both you just stand there looking at each other, letting the silence and awkwardness take over the both of you.

“Can you please let me in?” He asks you; it almost sounds like a beg.

You don’t say anything, you just open the door for him. The sadness on his face breaks your heart, especially because you know you’re the one that caused it.

He makes his way into your apartment and sits on the couch moving your blankets out of the way. He looks up at you and pats the spot next to him.

You make your way over to him; you sit a little further away from the spot he patted. A frown makes its way onto his face.

“Can we talk about what happened earlier? I’d like to believe that you don’t want us to actually be over.” He says all while scooting closer to you, your thighs touching.

You nod your head yes, keeping your eyes on your hands that are placed in your lap. You’re embarrassed by your actions.

“Please Y/N, look at me, please.” The softness in his voice makes you look up at him. Your eyes meet his blue ones, you see them glossy and some tears pooling in them.

You reach up and wipe away some of the ones that had fallen. Your heart breaks at the sight of him.

“I’m sorry O, it’s just I don’t even know where to start.” It’s true you don’t. You never had to tell someone all about your mental health. Your mom and best friend were there with you through your process of finding out your struggle with depression and your diagnosis, so you never had to explain it to them.

“It’s okay love, just take your time.” He says to you, he grabs your hand, intertwining your fingers together.

You sigh knowing you’re going to have to tell him the truth. He was right you really didn’t want your relationship to be over. You loved him, if you wanted it to work you needed to be truthful and honest with him.

“A few years ago I was diagnosed with depression. I go to therapy to get help with it, but sometimes I deal with depressive episodes. That’s what I have been dealing with the last few days.” He just looks at you carefully, listening to you and taking all your words in. You continue. “It’s hard, I get overwhelmed easily by my phone or even just talking to people. I usually just lock myself in my room until they pass. I know it’s not the healthiest way to cope but I’m doing my best to work on it.”

You continue to tell him about your depression. You tell him everything, when it started, when you started to go to therapy, all of it. It really did feel great getting it all off your chest. Owen listens carefully the entire time, he never interrupts you.

“I know how hard that must of been to tell me, Y/N. I appreciate you letting me in and telling me about it.” He says and pulls you in for a hug.

“I know I can’t fix it or change the situation, but I want to be here for you. A shoulder you can cry on or lean on when you need the extra support. I want to be a part of your life, every aspect of it, not just some player on the sideline.” He tells you.

His words bring tears to your eyes. You’re the only one who can work on yourself, you can put the time and work in to help better your mental health. But a shoulder to lean on doesn’t sound so bad.

“Hey, hey, you okay?” He asks you, putting a finger under your chin to get you to look at him.

“Yes, Owen, I’m fine. Your words and you just mean a lot to me. Thank you for understanding.” You tell him. He smiles at you.

“So are you my girlfriend again orrrr?” He asks laughing a little, you laugh a little too.

“As long as you’ll have me.”

“Of course I will. I love you.” He tells you.

You smile back at him, “I love you too O.” You lean in and your lips meet for a sweet kiss.

“Is there anything we can do? Or something I can do to help?” He asks you.

“Considering it’s now past midnight, I think I’m okay.” You laugh. “Plus I’m tired O, I still feel mentally exhausted too. I could still use a day of relaxing here.” You tell him honestly.

“That sounds good to me. Is it okay that I stick around? We could cuddle.” He has the cutest smile on his face. You couldn’t say no to him, even if you wanted too.

“I like the sound of that O.”

After that the two of you made your way into your bedroom. You both lay in bed next to each other and cuddle into each other’s sides. You fall asleep that night a smile on your face. No one’s perfect, but it was nice to know that Owen accepted you and was willing to help you through whatever challenges you faced.

#owen patrick joyner #owen joyner #owen x reader #owen joyner imagine #owenjoynerimagines #owen joyner x y/n #owen joyner x reader #owen joyner fic #owen joyner fanfiction #owen joyner fluff #julie and the phantoms #julieandthephantomsimagine #jatp

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makeste · 4 years

Text

BnHA Chapter 296: Ngl, This One Pissed Me Off

Previously on BnHA: Deku was all, “p.s. I actually activated yet another quirk several chapters ago when Kacchan got stabbed.” Compress was all, “[gets captured and passes out].” Spinner was all “[rifles through Tomura’s pockets and slaps a random Charbroiled Hand onto his friend’s unconscious face].” Tomura was all, “SOMEHOW THAT ACTUALLY WORKED” and woke up again, except it wasn’t really him, it was everyone’s favorite Final Villain, AFO. AFO was all, “time to escape finally” and summoned a bunch of Noumu and Absconded with Spinner and the DabiMarble in tow. Skeptic was all, “Horikoshi forgot I existed, but I’m actually Absconding in marble-form as well.” Deku was all, “ATTENTION WORLD, I WOULD LIKE TO ANNOUNCE THAT I OFFICIALLY WANT TO SAVE SHIGARAKI TOMURA.” And then the arc just sort of ended lol.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all, “but when you think about it, do we really need literally any female teachers at U.A. at all?” and for whatever reason doesn’t stop to wait for an answer. Midnight, who absolutely did not need to die, Dies, and I’m pissed about it. Ochako wanders the ruins of Jakku for what feels like hours, rescuing small children while her adult hero compatriots fall to pieces around her, because apparently the U.A. kids really are the only people who have their shit together. The citizens of Japan are all “damn that’s wild, wonder how fucked we are now,” but are actually super casual and chill about it which is oddly realistic. The chapter ends with AFO in Tartarus being all “lol time for the prison break arc,” without giving us so much as a chance to catch our breath, like holy shit. Are we on the clock or something now, goddamn.

lmao it’s like 7pm on a Sunday night and this is out already. this is like the worst possible timing lol. there goes my nice, relaxed evening. unless of course this turns out to be a nice, restful, soothing chapter, as chapters coming on the heels of traumatic, earth-shattering battles so often are. yeah, break out the Pina Colada song and the little drink umbrellas, I got a good feeling about this one

(ETA: I mean, I was obviously being sarcastic here but damn, Horikoshi.)

-- fff why did I laugh

it’s the crumbling city ruins in the background that really does it, I think. JUST LOOK AT THIS MESS THAT YOU HAVE MADE, EVERYONE. FOR SHAME

also, the title is dramatic af and I am so fucking excited you guys, like holy shit. BnHA’s In-Between arcs have always been my favorite part of the series, because it’s when all the character development and angst and/or catharsis happens. just, those little breathing spaces in between the action when everyone gathers to recuperate and compartmentalize their fresh new traumas lmao. bring on that angst!! but also, let’s please have some Comfort to offset all of this Hurt too, please and thanks

blah blah blah so the survivors were evacuated, good good, can you actually show us though?

AHHHHHHH

PIXIE BOB SURVIVED!!!! WASH IS STILL ALIVE LMAO HOW. THIRTEEN’S FACE, OMG SHOULD I LOOK AWAY. IS IT LIKE MANDALORIAN RULES. IDK HOW IT WORKS

HOW THE FUCK ARE THEY ALIVE. LOLS ANYWAY I’M HERE FOR IT. FEEL FREE NOT TO KILL ANYONE ELSE HERE HORIKOSHI, I THINK WE’RE GOOD

(ETA: it’s like talking to a brick wall.)

oh my god do we really need exposition about how the heroes tried to stop TomurAFO from escaping and OF COURSE failed completely because they suck lmao. oh my god I am shocked, that is such shocking news

wow they only managed to defeat three of the Noumus. holy shit. again, all of the Not-Kid Heroes are only slightly more useful than cardboard cutouts of heroes at this point, MORE AT ELEVEN

so Tomura may have lost the PLF, but he still more or less has an army then, huh. I really don’t know how anyone could expect a timeskip with that threat looming over everyone’s heads

oh nvm lol there are only seven Noumus left. wait so you’re telling me there were only ten Nearly High Ends in that last chapter?? felt more like fifty but whatever lol I’ll take your word for it

COMPRESS YAY YOU’RE ALIVE TOO

MAYBE THEY CAN EVEN REATTACH HIS ASS. I’M SERIOUS LOL, BECAUSE HE STILL HAS IT, DOESN’T HE? OR IF NOT, THEY CAN REBUILD HIM WITH A PROSTHETIC ASS. he’ll be more powerful than ever

WHAAAAAAT YEAH BOIIIII

WOOO, EDGESHOT, WOOOOO. THAT’S HIS WAY OF THE NINJA

YEAHHHHH SUCK IT, PLF

(ETA: for the record I don’t think Cementoss is dead here, just badly wounded. if he had died he would have been included in the forthcoming In Memoriam page along with the others.)

GET BENT LOL. TRUMPET I FOR REAL FORGOT YOU EVEN EXISTED. I NEVER WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOU LOSERS AGAIN PLEASE. ONLY INTERESTING CHARACTERS MAY PROCEED PAST THIS POINT

dsflksaldkh;l

that’s... holy shit. that’s a bigass mansion, that’s what that is. also so does this mean there are still eighty thousand PLF members still at large, because that’s a plot line I very much do not care about in any way whatsoever lol. can’t we just retcon to say that Re-Destro was exaggerating? I mean hell, a CEO criminal pulling some Enron-type bullshit is pretty believable, isn’t it? those poor bamboozled shareholders

“makeste, here’s an idea, what if you scrolled down to read the rest of the page” lol gtfo of here with your logic and your sense

well those 132 people have made it onto my enemies list, but at least it sounds like they more or less took care of the rest. good riddance

and Toga escaped, as we knew already, and is now on the lam. hopefully she reunites with the League again at some point. although her doing her own thing could also be very interesting. idk what I want lol

anyway so there’s another big panel showing how fucked up the city is, just in case it hadn’t already been hammered into our skulls yet. there’s a car dangling off a roof somehow. how does that even happen. did Machia pick it up and put it there or

NOOO OMG RANDOM SMALL CHILDREN IN PERIL WHAT IS THIS

OCHAKO PLEASE SAVE THEM OMG

“if it falls on me, I want you to have my Endeavor pouch” OH MY STARS. HIS MOST PRECIOUS POSSESSION. NO MY CHILD YOU CAN’T GIVE UP HOPE YET

LMAO

“FOR THE LAST TIME NOBODY CARES ABOUT YOUR DUSTY-ASS POUCH, KYLE” fffff these children are dying and I am cracking up so hard my eyes are tearing up what is wrong with me

YAY THEY SAVED THEM

but listen. not that I don’t love seeing the girls kick ass, because you know I do. but I also really, REALLY need to know what’s going down with the Musketeers, and I’m not looking forward to waiting three whole weeks for that so please Horikoshi. please hurry this along so we can get to them

goddamn it Tsuyu is saying she’ll take the boy to the shelter to get first aid, and I was all “okay great because that’s probably where Kacchan and the others are too”, but now someone else is shouting for help and Ochako’s all “I’ll go” and it’s like OKAY BUT PLEASE? this chapter is already more than half over omfg. ‘bout to start wringing some hands here

oh my god

is this Toga again??? WHAT THE HELL, THIS CREEPYASS HALF-DEAD DUDE BETTER BE LEADING UP TO SOMETHING INTERESTING, I AM REALLY GETTING IMPATIENT

OR, I GUESS, WE COULD DO THIS INSTEAD

“SO AS IT TURNS OUT, NOT EVERY CHARACTER WHO NEEDS HELP SAVING THEIR SPOUSE FROM FALLEN RUBBLE IS ACTUALLY TOGA IN DISGUISE” HUH, OKAY. DULY NOTED. FILED AWAY FOR FUTURE REFERENCE

but fucking... okay, look. I love Ochako, I do. but I like her a whole lot more when she’s interacting with other characters I actually care about, as opposed to running around in the rubble rescuing random people while the fate of my other children is still up in the air. like okay, I get it, shit’s bad, now if you don’t mind we really don’t have to spend all day here though

...anyways but nope, we’re still staying with her. she’s bouncing around rescuing all of these other people. omg. I literally have no patience here at all and it’s terrible, I know, but oh my god

omg finally something interesting is happening!!

look at that, an adult hero standing around being useless while the kids are busy getting shit done. why is this becoming a recurring theme

MY DUDE, THIS IS SERIOUSLY NOT THE TIME THOUGH

I GET THAT IT’S OVERWHELMING AND THAT YOU’RE TRAUMATIZED AND SHIT, BUT GUESS WHAT, SO IS EVERYONE ELSE. THAT’S WHAT YOU SIGNED UP FOR. JUST LOOK AT OCHAKO! SHE’S SO EXHAUSTED HER HAIR HAS EVEN LOST ITS FLOOF, AND YET SHE’S STILL OUT HERE DOING HER BEST. ONE SAVE AT A TIME MY MAN. GET IT DONE. LITERALLY A SMALL CHILD IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT CALLING FOR THEIR MOMMY AND YOU’RE JUST STANDING THERE ALL “WAHH IT’S TOO MUCH” LIKE COULD YOU PLEASE POSTPONE YOUR CRISIS UNTIL AFTER YOU SAVE THEM PLEASE

OH MY GOD

MAYBE YOU SHOULD!! oh my god I really cannot, like wow. oh no I actually have to save people and do my job, god forbid. jesus christ, at least the other heroes tried. but Moping Hero: Bellyache here is just throwing in the towel and fuck everyone who still needs his help I guess. you are like the anti-Deku my dude

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO OH FUCK

THAT’S MIDNIGHT’S HAND OH FU -- SHE BETTER NOT -- HORIKOSHI I SWEAR TO GOD --

I’M GONNA LOSE IT I REALLY AM!!!!

HOLY SHIT HOW INTENSE OF A RAGE DO I NEED TO BRACE MYSELF TO BE FEELING HERE. THIS CHAPTER WAS ALREADY TRENDING TOWARDS DISAPPOINTMENT, DO WE REALLY NEED TO GO AND COMPOUND THAT

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

you’re telling me Tomura wasn’t brought back by that electric shock, but by his “fuck you” attitude? why are you explaining this to us now, again??

......

HEY, SO UM, FUCK ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS, THOUGH. (: OH MAN. OHHHHHH MAN. I HAVE... I HAVE GOT A LOT OF WORDS FOR THIS AND HERE ARE SOME OF THEM

FUCK

THINGS THAT SHOULD BE IN THE DICTIONARY NEXT TO “SOME BULLSHIT”: THIS

FUCK

GET FUCKED HORIKOSHI

AND ALSO PLEASE FUCK RIGHT OFF!!

AND SERIOUSLY THOUGH FUCK YOU

NO BUT YOU KNOW WHAT THOUGH!! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED OFF ANYONE. LITERALLY ANY CHARACTER. YOU HAD TWELVE FEMALE PROS. TWELVE. YOU COULD HAVE MADE MORE OF THEM. PROBABLY, IF THERE ACTUALLY WERE SUPERHEROES IN REAL LIFE, THERE WOULD BE MORE THAN TWELVE OF THEM IN AN ENTIRE NATION. BUT NO, YOU WERE ALL “TWELVE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH.” AND THEN WHEN IT CAME TIME TO KILL PEOPLE OFF, YOU WERE ALL “WELL ALL RIGHT THEN, LET’S SEE, I PICK... THESE 18 RANDOM SIDE CHARACTERS WITH LITTLE TO NO DIALOGUE, PLUS THE ONE SINGLE FEMALE U.A. STAFF MEMBER WE ACTUALLY HAD. YEAH THAT OUGHTA DO IT”

AND BY THE WAY, HORIKOSHI, I PICKED SOMETHING UP FOR YOU ON MY WAY HOME, HERE IT IS, ┌П┐(・＿・) do you like it it was on sale. I saw it and was like, “Horikoshi would really like that.” so there you go. sorry it wasn’t gift-wrapped

p.s. I hope y’all can tell that that’s supposed to be a middle finger and not... something else lmao. er. anyway

(ETA: so I got a few asks from people who were really put off by this part of the reaction post, and so I’m just adding an extra note here to make it clear that I do not actually wish harm on Horikoshi in any way or even particularly dislike him. I wasn’t happy about Midnight’s death and I wanted to convey that, and so I went with my usual LOUD CAPSLOCK REACTION tone, but looking back on it I can see that it’s kind of a lot, lol.

so just to be clear, the “fuck you” stuff is almost entirely tongue-in-cheek. that’s on me, I forget sometimes that there are people who share these sentiments unironically and so I didn’t think to make sure my intended meaning here was clear. anyways, killing Midnight was still a really problematic decision for numerous reasons but it is what it is. Horikoshi is not perfect, the story isn’t perfect, and I’m not gonna pretend like it is, but again just to be clear, I don’t harbor any actual ill will toward Horikoshi here.)

shit. and wow this man really went and killed off fucking Mystic too on top of that. have you ever seen a character fail so spectacularly at living up to their hype. r.i.p. Mystic you were like the Star Wars sequel of characters

(ETA: I have no fucking idea why I keep thinking Majestic’s name is Mystic lol. rest in peace you old scarecrowy bastard.)

and poor Momo, though. fuck. lost two mentors in a single day. and do not even get me started on Aizawa holy shit

so now we’re cutting to some random townspeople who are gossiping about the Todoroki drama. this is actually interesting in spite of my newfound determination to hate this chapter lol

ngl I am kind of heartened to see that not everyone fell for Dabi’s bs hook line and sinker though. Jeanist returning from the dead literally two seconds after Dabi was all “I SWEAR ON MY HONOR AS A VILLAIN THAT HAWKS MURDERED HIM” probably helped with that a bit! but there will doubtless be many other people who do believe him, or are at least still inclined to side-eye the heroes in general either way given how much they sucked in this arc. very, very interesting

so it seems though that even more than the whole Endeavor reveal, at the end of the day it’s going to be the heroes failing to live up to their end of the “put your faith in us and let us use our quirks and in return we’ll protect everyone and keep them safe” implied social contract that’s going to have the biggest impact on people’s opinions moving forward. basically this was always going to be a disaster no matter what

OH MY GOD FINALLY AHHHHH

Horikoshi really tapped into some of the real-life political energy of the past few years huh. Fuck Him Still for killing off Midnight, but I will admit that so far this is hella intriguing and I am really, really curious to see where things go from here

OH MY GOD THE LITTLE KIDS FROM THE BABYSITTING ARC

“FIVE PEEPEE MAN WOULDN’T LIE TO US” YES CHILDREN YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. at least the little ones still have faith

( •̀ へ •́ )

that’s great. that’s really keen. all we need right now, amirite

GOOD FOR YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT

let’s just wait for him to explain what he feels. you know he likes to drag it out

is that Dabi crouched down there next to Spinner? looks like they got him out of the marble after all. but why has his hair changed colors again lol what

anyways. your turn to what??

:’) excuse me what

hahahaha are you fucking kidding me. and that’s where we’re going to end the chapter then. lol okay

so let’s recap. Midnight died. we spent ten hours watching Ochako dig people out of rubble for no apparent reason and were then introduced to my new least favorite character, and because Ochako is so nice she didn’t even punch him in the face even though she really should have. we did not get any Kacchan or Shouto. we got one panel of Deku, who is Finally Asleep. and the chapter ended with AFO ordering his Noumus to go set free, AND I QUOTE, HIS “MAIN BODY.” and now I gotta wait an entire week for Caleb’s translation to confirm that last part. omg

but it sounds like a prison break is imminent, which is very, very interesting. ...and actually, is it weird that I’m actually rooting for it to be a success? I have no idea what this guy is planning, but I do know that as long as the main part of his soul is still residing in Tomura’s body, Tomura’s chance of surviving the series is close to zero. and villain though he may be, I’m still rooting for his redemption (nice to have Deku on my side now too), and so yeah. so like if AFO feels like using some latent Exorcism Quirk or something that he’s been saving for just such an occasion, be my guest lol

meanwhile this doesn’t bode well for All Might though. or anyone else aside from Tomura, really. shiiiit

anyway. [slaps roof of chapter] this baby can fit so much bullshit in it

#bnha 296 #midnight (bnha)#uraraka ochako #all for one #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #sorry this took so long to post lol #I really need to learn to add an extra 2-3 hours to any time-sensitive estimates I make #anyways

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shhh-no-ones-home · 3 years

Text

another one down Helmut Zemo x reader x Bucky Barnes

+++++++++ Mostly Zemo but ends with Bucky, if you read it you'll see what I mean lol

Song: control freak by doll skin

tag list: @cynic-spirit +++++++++

The safe house was a beautiful sight to behold. It was minimalist but very lavish, something that absolutely screamed Helmut Zemo. From the colors used in the paintings on the walls to the furnishings placed ever so carefully around the large room. Even for just a safe house, not a intended, livable, home; everything seemed so meticulous and thought out.

"Do you like it?"

The baron inquired, motioning his hand for me to sit on the plush couch. I of course would be lying if I said I didn't. It was much nicer than any place I'd ever had the pleasure of staying, apart from maybe the compound but even that didn't have the same spark that this did. I couldn't help but gawk at the grand estate he'd lead us to stay in.

"It is nice, that's for sure."

I confessed, trying not boost his ego but catching the smug look on his face as he watched me sit. Another thing I'd noticed about him. Every move I made since I'd met them in Madripoor seemed to catch his eye, and then some. Not only did he carry himself with stature, he made sure he was always one step ahead, knowing you better than you knew yourself. Part of me wondered if he knew I found him attractive. The other part wanted me to stop thinking about it.

"I've seen better."

Bucky said slyly, pouring himself a drink. His whole body looked tense, angry even, like he was trying with every fiber in his being not to kill the man standing in front of me. And who knew, maybe he was.

"Sure you have."

I barely caught as Zemo mumbled under his breath. I glanced between the two of them. Bucky was staring daggers through the baron and his jaw was visibly tightening.

"What's the point of all this stuff anyways if it just sits around doing nothing?"

Buck grumbled, clearly annoyed. Similar to me Sam just sat and watched the little quarrel at hand.

"Usually it would not just be sitting around. But in case you forgot I've been a little busy elsewhere."

Zemo was stepping further and further away from me, seemingly challenging Bucky with every step he made.

"Back in my day you only needed one place to call home."

Bucky stepped closer. They were almost chest to chest.

"Back in your day-"

"This is not a pissing contest boys."

I interrupted, Sam sending me a look as I stood and walked to them. I looked between them both. Bucky was all but seething; and I'm sure it didn't help that Zemo looked as cool as ever, barely worked up or even irritated.

"I don't care what the two of you have to do to get through this but it had better happen sooner rather than later, because if I have to listen to you two bicker like an old married couple for five more minutes I am absolutely going to lose it. And I don't think any of us want that."

It came out a little more stern than I had intended but they knew exactly what I meant. My powers sort of permitted that, but of the three of them Bucky was the only one who'd ever seen it happen. Not to mention the only one who'd ever been able to come near me enough to calm me down.

"How about we all just get something to eat and go to our respective rooms for the night. Not another word nor topic need be talked about."

The suggestion didn't go unnoticed as Bucky side eyed me, looking to Sam sat at the table watching this play out in silence.

"I think that's the best idea you've had all day."

°°°°°°°°°

After dinner we were shown to different rooms upstairs. It was all just as elegant as the rest of the house but the thing I was most excited about was the large bed taking up the majority of the space I was in. The only thing that would've made it more perfect was if Bucky could manage to sneak his way in here and fall asleep in my arms like he did back home. Not that we were a thing, but we found comfort in each other, so often times he spent the night at my place. After the first couple times we realized how stupid it was to not stay in the same bed together and here recently that had become the new norm. That is until he left to take care of the Karli situation.

It didn't matter though, because we were back together again. Well, sort of. But even here I felt betrayed by my own body. Usually I thought solely about Bucky. He was my person whether I wanted to admit it or not, even if we'd never gone on a proper date or called it what it really was. But despite that, and despite myself, I was yearning. And I felt guilty about it because now I was doing something that felt worthy of guilt. I shouldn't be thinking about the baron the way I was that's for sure. God I needed to go to bed, to shower, to do anything that made me stop thinking about it. But then there was a knock at the door. My brows knitted together in confusion as I opened it, just the person I didn't want to see.

"I wanted to come make sure you were comfortable with your accommodations."

Helmut said, his hands clasped behind his back as he stood tall and stoic in front of me.

"Yes, thank you."

He nodded once, turning his body away from me like he was preparing to leave.

"Is there anything I could get for you before you turn in for the night?"

He asked and it hit me, the shame of wanting him to come in.

"Actually, would you mind showing me how the shower works, I would hate to accidently break it."

I let out a nervous laugh, one he rivaled with a toothy grin as I let him into my room.

"It would be my pleasure."

He sang, following me slowly to the bathroom. Once there he sat at the edge of the tub and looked up at me, a small smile now playing on his lips.

"You know, you seem to be a complicated little thing."

I drew my brows.

"How so?"

He shrugged, reaching over and turning the faucet on the right.

"Hot here, cold here, shower plug."

He instructed before turning it back off and standing up. I watched as he walked back out into the room and before he could leave I caught his arm.

"Wait."

I said quickly. I needed something answered.

"Please tell me what you mean. I've heard about you and I need to know why it's me that escapes you."

I confessed almost desperately.

"Of the heroes you are the one with the least information, no background, no comprised list of powers, and no track record. Apart from James' apparent desire to please you, you don't have a tether to anything or anyone. I admire that about you."

God the blood should not be rushing to the places that it is. he spoke so smoothly it was like my brain stopped working. But despite that, there was one thing that caught my attention.

"You think Bucky aims to please me?"

I asked almost embarrassed and he smirked at me.

"There are much better pleasures in this world than the ones he is offering you."

He said lowly, stepping closer and closing the gap between us. It took me a moment to realize but I'd been holding my breath as his gaze bore into my own.

"And what pleasures are those?"

It was quiet and reserved, and maybe a bit testing, though unintentional. The look he gave me following my statement told me everything I needed to know, but if I had any questions about it they were answered when he leaned down and kissed me gently. There was a pause at first, from both of us like he was waiting for me to pull away, but I didn't. When he realized that though he stepped closer, if that was even possible; one hand on my hip and the other placed gently at my jaw as he now kissed me with purpose.

Once again my brain stopped altogether and I couldn't focus on anything but him. My hands tailed slowly up his arms, one making its way into his hair and tugging lightly. The hum that escaped him made me smile before he pulled away. His eyes were darker now, a hunger behind them as he stared down at me.

"Pleasures you could never even imagine."

He recited, trailing his finger tips across my jaw. We were still in very close proximity and as I thought for a second to kiss him again it was like I was brought back to reality, pushing him away and covering my mouth with my hand.

"No."

I said, muffled, unbelieving myself and what I'd just done.

"I can't do this, not to him."

It came out a little more broken than i'd intended but then again that's kind of how it felt. He looked down, nodding once as he resumed the position I'd met him in, hands clasped behind his back.

"You have a commitment to him. I understand."

He said in a soft tone. I felt bad again but this time I couldn't quite tell why. It was like I was letting him down but he was right. I did have a commitment to Bucky, to be there for him like he was for me.

"He's the only one who understands me."

I croaked out, trying to find any other answers behind the barons eyes that I was right to feel the way I did.

"That could change."

He said matter-of-factly and suddenly the feeling in my gut changed.

"Maybe I don't want it to."

I snapped back, brows drawn in frustration that he would be so bold to suggest I pick him over Buck. I stepped to him, finger in his face as he walked backwards into the door.

"at the end of the day you'll be back behind bars. He has been nothing but amazing to me since we met, a true gentleman and a friend. That's not going to change just because you come along with your stupid fancy house and antique cars. He cares about me, and I him."

The rage behind my eyes must have told him all he needed to know after that, his hands in the air as he finally looked different than his usual cool self. I had to admit though that it was probably my powers coming through, when I got worked up or angry they had a tendency of showing up. But one thing we didn't need was me crushing him or his house into the ground. I shook the thought as I opened the door, motioning for him to leave. He stood in the doorway for a second though.

"It wouldn't matter anyway y/n, like you said, he cares about you."

When he looked to the side with a knowing glance my face dropped, watching in horror as he nodded.

"James."

He said, walking off and leaving me to my devices as Bucky came into view.

"So you don't mind that I don't have a fancy house and antique cars?"

I laughed out, a sound somewhere between angry and unbelieving, reaching for his hand and squeezing it lightly.

"Do you love me?"

I asked. There was a pause and I almost got worried, but the genuine smile that spread across his features tore that feeling away very quickly. He nodded before pulling me flush to him.

"I do."

He said and all my worries melted away. i couldnt believe id been so stupid.

"Do you?"

He asked, making me blush as I nodded back, snaking my arms around his neck.

"So frickin much."

"thats good, cause i was worried id lost you there for a second."

he confessed and i just closed my eyes, feeling him press his forehead to mine.

"you could never lose me."

i breathed against him, his lips ghosting over my own.

"promise?"

i bit my lip for only a second before crashing them into his, holding the back of his head in my hand as he held me tightly to him. when we pulled away i looked between his eyes, almost getting lost in them. i nodded slowly as he stared back down at me waiting for an answer.

"i promise."

#wattpad #x reader #baron zemo #helmut zemo #zemo #bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #the winter soldier #white wolf #the falcon and the winter soldier #the falcon #captain america #imagines #one shots #marvel #322

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pm-my-hubbies · 4 years

Text

Lani’s Crown | H.C.

Summary: Reader and Henry’s daughter has landed herself in a bit of trouble and needs to understand the importance they put into her hair.

Pairing: Dad!Henry x Black Mom!Reader

Word Count: 1.9k

I knew this day would come and unfortunately, I hadn’t prepared myself for it. “Hey, don’t forget you gotta have that talk with Lani pretty soon,” my conscience would remind me as I stared in awe at a queen with a head full of kinky hair. Like the snap of a hypnosis’ fingers, the task would slip away from me and I would return to whatever I had on my plate for the time being. Apparently, this “talk” wasn’t at the top of my to-do list.

My eyes shift from the shoulder length hair on the right side of my five year-old’s head to the gapped up left side. Something tells me she was reenacting Halle Berry’s notorious transformation scene from Catwoman as it’s become a favorite of hers in the past couple of weeks. This idea prompts me to hold in the snicker threatening to fall past my lips because right now is not a laughing matter.

“I honestly don’t know what to say Ailani.” I speak. It’s not that I’m mad at my baby because that’s what she is: a baby. She’s still struggling to steady the handlebars of her bicycle when she rides and her tongue has begun poking out the side of her mouth as she attempts to loop her shoe laces together. She doesn’t know how special her hair is because I hadn’t told her. And even if I did, it’ll take her brain ages to digest the information.

“I’m sorry, Mommy. I didn’t mean it.” she whimpers.

“I know baby but... why did you go for the scissors? You know you’re only supposed to use them for cutting paper and when adults are around. What happened?”

Today had been a good day at the restaurant. As the manager of the small-staffed bakery not too far from Lani’s school, majority of the tasks outside of sitting behind the desk fell onto me two weeks ago when three of the employees decided “a mental break” was necessary (I would’ve been fine if I hadn’t seen one of them chugging down beer after beer when I went out for drinks with some friends on a Friday night). Garlic wafted up my nostrils the moment I stepped over the threshold into our home and I knew something was up as my husband was cooking my comfort meal. He didn’t say anything when I asked of our daughter’s whereabouts. A nod in the direction of our dining room that was connected to the living room was all I needed to know something had happened. Lani has already placed her crayons to the side of her paper on the dining room table and peeked up at me with solemn eyes.

“Charlotte and I were play—” she began.

“Wait, Charlotte?”

Lani bowed her head in shame. “Yes.”

God fucking dammit. “Lani, why would... why would you play with Charlotte after Mommy told you to not be around her anymore?”

Her head was still low but I managed to catch the next statement clear as day. “Because she said I could make more friends if my hair was short like her and the other girls.”

I felt as if I were on fire. My body burned with anger and once again, it wasn’t directed towards Lani. Charlotte was once the little girl you wanted your children to play with every single day. But after some time, her true bad habits made an appearance and next thing you know, you were constantly disregarding the ringing of your doorbell as she shouted for your child. To add on to her pest-like behavior, Charlotte’s parents could never recognize the wrongs in her actions.

I shouldn’t be surprised such words could come from a child’s mouth but I am. Maybe it’s because it’s been a while since I allowed another kindergartener to bully me and I assumed times have changed for them to not talk out of their asses. Yet, here we are.

“Ailani, can you look at me? Please?” I calmly asked.

My daughter finally picked her head up and it was in this moment that all frustration I felt for her former friend dissipated. Her round cheeks were wet with fresh tears, brown eyes the size of saucers.

“Oh Ailani.” I cooed, walking around the coffee table dividing us to plant myself on the floor next to her. I pulled her onto my lap, her face pressing against my chest as her body racked with sobs. “Shhh, it’s okay.”

“I hurt your feelings, Mommy.”

“You did baby but that’s beside the point. Your feelings are hurting right now and it’s landed you in some mess.” I explained. Internally, I was chanting to not let the waterworks flow.

Lani continued her moment of sadness at most likely destroying the pride I held for her hair. The left side was the only destruction, which left more on her head. Still, blades made contact with the kinks at an inappropriate time.

Eventually, her body ceased the shaking and all I could feel was the large gulps she took as she calmed down. I guess now was the time to talk to her.

“You did hurt Mommy’s feelings because I love your hair. But at the same time, Mommy never told you how special your hair is so you wouldn’t do what you did.” I began. “Most girls want a crown to look like the Disney princesses they see on TV. I was one of those girls but I only wanted the tiara to be like the other girls. Do you hear me?”

She nodded. “Mmhm.”

“Good. Your grandmother told me that I didn’t need a crown to be pretty or like other girls because I already had one with me that followed me everywhere. And that, my Love, is my hair. Sit up for a second.” My daughter did as told, straddling my lap with bloodshot eyes looking into my watery ones. I placed my hand in her hair to massage her scalp. “The thing about your hair and my hair is that it’s unique. It’s what makes us beautiful. Some days we’ll braid it and other days we can wear it loose. The best thing about our hair is that it’s like a magicians hat to people that don’t look like us.”

“A magicians hat?”

“Mmhm. See, the only thing you know about a magicians hat is that it’s the same one they always wear. And every time they reach into it, it’s something new they pull out that amazes the audience every single time. With you, people will always see you with the same hair style until you straighten it. And every time you straighten it, it’ll be longer than before and amaze people each time. And that, my Darling, is because people are idiots when it comes to us and our hair.”

The cutest of giggles escaped Lani’s lips and I couldn’t help but to grin at the sound I got out of her. “Mommy no!”

“It’s true Lani! A lot of people don’t know much about our hair except to tell us how to style it. Your dad’s an exception, even though he can be a little dumb at times.”

“I heard that!” Henry exclaimed from the kitchen.

I chuckled as I leaned to the side to respond with, “Mind your business!”

“Can’t do that when you brought me into it.”

I glanced back at Lani with a smirk on my face. “You know what, your dad is right for once.”

Heavy footsteps echoed throughout the lower level of our home as Henry exited the kitchen to enter the living room where Lani and I sat. He held a similar smile to the one I wore when mocking his correctness. “Is this how you discipline our daughter when I’m not around? Throw me under the bus?”

“Not exactly.”

“Goodness woman.” He chuckled, treading over to where we rested. He swung his legs around my shoulder to plop down behind me on the sofa and place his hands on my shoulders. “Everything good now?”

Although her original hairstyle was jacked up now due to the scissors, I continued rubbing my hands through her beautiful hair. “I think so. But before I tell you to go upstairs and start running your bath water, I want you to remember something: girls like Charlotte are not your friend.”

“Your mother is right Lani.”

My head tilted up slightly so I could toss him a smile of appreciation for backing me up. “Friends do not tell you to change how you look so you can hang out with them. They chose to be your friend and should deal with it. Do you understand?”

“I think so.” Although it was meant to be a statement, she answered it more of like a question.

“Can you try to repeat that back for Mommy and Daddy but in your own words?”

She rapidly nodded her head. “Um... Charlotte should play with me because she likes how I look?”

“That’s our girl!” Henry praised her with a pinch to her cheeks.

“That’s right. And if she tells you what to do again, you either tell the teacher or tell her to stop. Yes?”

“Yes.” She affirmed.

“Good. Now go run your bath water for Mommy and then I’ll be up to wash you before we eat dinner.”

As soon as she hopped off my thighs to disappear up the stairs, Henry wrapped his arms around my neck. His lips landed on my cheek for peck. “You handled that well.” He mumbled.

I gently massaged his forearms with my hands. “You think so?”

“Yes. I was expecting the worse. Yelling, maybe a pop or two.”

“Some people will think I’m the worst parent for restricting my daughter from doing such a thing as today but that’s the thing: she’s not their daughter. If she cuts her hair, I have to bend over backwards and find styles for her hair and I really don’t have the time for that.” I elaborated, a huff following right after. “She’s lucky she did this today because now, she has an excuse to see her auntie Marilyn.”

“Oh but your Saturday.” I wasn’t looking at him but I could hear the pout in his voice as he pressed another kiss to my skin but this time on my neck.

I deeply exhaled. “I know, I know. I’ll just reserve it for Sunday like we’re supposed to anyways.”

Silence filled the spacious room now. Within seconds, the faint sound of water hitting the hard surface of our bath tub upstairs interrupted the peace that had quickly formed between Henry and I.

“Now that I’ve given her the heart-to heart talk, it’s your turn to talk with Charlotte’s parents.”

“What? Why me?” He groaned like a child restricted to the confines of his home on a Friday evening.

“Because I can’t catch a case. That little girl pissed me off and I won’t be so nice if I talk to her parents. And even if I did play nice, they’d still say something. When it’s you, there’s less backlash.”

“I— dammit. You’re right.”

“Get to work Superman.” I playfully ordered as I stood up between his legs to stretch my cramped limbs. A giggle my lips as his hand lightly connected with my ass. I felt like a love struck high schooler all over again when I spun around to lean against his strong frame and place my hands on his pecs. “You’ve got some saving to do and for once, it’s not me.”

“Indeed I do.” He mumbled before leaning down to deeply kiss me.

#henry cavill #henry cavill imagines #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill x woc reader #henry cavill x black reader #henry cavill x you #henry cavill x female reader

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allygodot · 4 years

Text

Taking Accountability

My name is Adam, but people online call me Coffee. I’m a 27 years old graduate of Chicago Law School living in Green Bay, Wisconsin. I am a heterosexual Christian, but am an ally to the LGBT community. My main interests are Ace Attorney, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, and My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. These are all things my followers should know about me, so why am I telling you this? Well... what if I told you it was all a lie? I’m sure this is coming as a shock to a lot of you, and I sincerely apologize to everyone I’ve hurt with my deception. It is my hope that this post will clear up any misconceptions that have been spread about me, whether I spread them myself or otherwise, and that in the future there will be no animosity between us. I don’t expect to be forgiven nor do I deserve it, but if there is one thing I learned from my time in the church it is that all I can do is ask for mercy and hope for the best. But first... I think an explanation is in order. If all that isn’t the truth, then what is? It all starts in college, that nebulous period of my life that everyone keeps asking about and I keep bringing up. Before I went to university, I had always been completely unremarkable. I had always had the kind of fair weather friends who enjoyed my company, but never felt to invested in me. Combined with my status as a middle child, I always felt like I had something to prove to get people to like me. I would say and think whatever I needed to for them to stick around another day, and I’m sure you are familiar with what that means for teenage boys. I acted immaturely because it was what was expected... and anything outside of that was looked down upon it even forbidden. I never thought much of it at the time, but I realize now that I wasn’t allowed much self-expression when I was always trying to conform to their standards. Everything changed when I met him. My assigned college roommate, Anton, was everything my years of conditioning had taught me to distrust. Despite his tall stature, he was emotional and sensitive... even vulnerable. Even so, he wasn’t afraid to be unabashedly himself. The first thing that struck me as unusual about him was his clothing... he almost always wore pastel pink or yellow and I hardly ever saw him without his long, checkered scarf. His nails were always painted with a clear, glittery polish, and I don’t think he ever skipped a shower in his life. His hair was always soft and smelled like strawberry even at a distance... all this to say he immediately struck me as fruity so I wanted nothing to do with him, at least initially. Despite his kindness to me, I would always respond with either the cold shoulder or open scorn, which only amplified the more I learned about him. I discovered pretty quickly that he was a furry, since one day I came home from a day of classes to find a decapitated pink cat head on our couch. He patiently explained the whole culture to me while I glared at him skeptically, but he didn’t seem bothered at all. He even brought out his paws and tail and told me he was saving up for a full suit despite my open disgust. Looking back, I still have no clue why he put up with me during that time. Another curious aspect of Anton’s life was his addiction to a certain television series called “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.” His room was filled with merchandise from stuffed animals to figurines, and I had nothing but disdain for the tacky and embarrassing decoration. I was afraid that if I ever brought a girl over to our apartment she would notice and make all sorts of incorrect assumptions... I couldn’t handle the embarrassment. I tried on multiple occasions to convince him to hide them in a secret box or something, but he always just smiled and shook his head. I even tried to sneak into his room and collect all the ponies for donation once, but he had anticipated this and hid a playful trap for me... I reached forward to grab one of his overpriced statues and immediately got a face full of multi-colored snakes. I was livid of course, despite it being my own fault for trying to pawn of his collection in the first place, but he wasn’t even phased by my tirade. I suppose he was 6’5” and I was (and still am) only 5′7″... but still, I had at least expected him to be somewhat apologetic if not fearful. Instead, he just laughed and told me I should watch the show with him sometime. I obviously had no intentions of taking him up on his ludicrous offer... until he promised that if I didn’t enjoy the show, he would move all of his ponies into a case that he would throw a big curtain on whenever I said the word. I reluctantly agreed on those conditions, positive that this was a bet I couldn’t lose. I still remember that night like it was yesterday. He lead me into the pony chamber and sat down on his bed, taking out his laptop to pull up his favorite episode. It was “The Canterlot Wedding” two part season finale, and although I initially protested that I only agreed to watch one episode, I eventually relented once he reminded me what the prize was. I was hesitant to sit beside him on his bed and lean over his shoulder to look at the small screen, but he assured me that it didn’t bother him at all. I wasn’t particularly concerned with how he felt about it... it was more so my own pride I was worried about. Nevertheless, I sat through the whole episode with him despite myself. Although I was disturbed by the tendency for his long and curly hair to gravitate into my mouth while I rested my cheek against his shoulder, I found the episode to be surprisingly enjoyable. The song in particular surprised me with it’s musicality... by the end of it I didn’t want to leave, but I was far too embarrassed to admit that to him earnestly. I told him I was interested in the show purely for the songs and that it could benefit my studies as a music major, but that he still had to uphold his end of the bargain since I was by no means enjoying it. He just smiled and put on another episode, and before I knew it the sun was rising outside his window. I realized just how tired I was and turned to tell him I would be going to bed only to discover he had fallen asleep. I began to suspect that he must have been asleep for several hours, letting the auto-play functionality do his job for him while he rested up for his exams. Although I was scandalized, I was impressed by his tactical prowess... he had managed to trap me in his room, since I couldn’t move from my spot without disturbing his slumber, and he didn’t even have to be awake to do it. Begrudgingly, I spent the rest of his room, until eventually the faint aroma of strawberries lured me into the world of dreams... This arrangement continued for quite some time. When I got home from my classes, Anton would ask me if I wanted to watch some My Little Pony with him and I only agreed so long as he put the curtain over the cabinet next time I asked. He always obliged whenever I asked him to conceal his collection, but eventually I stopped asking for him to do so and only reminded him not to break our contract before every episode out of habit. It became a ritual for the two of us to do this every night, and even once we had finished all of the episodes we would just watch them again. I found that I was becoming endeared to this eccentric man... and as much as I tried to resist it, I couldn’t help but feel my heart swell a bit in my chest whenever he would run his fingers through his hair or tighten his scarf around his neck. I told myself it was nothing... but it wouldn’t remain that way for long. I don’t know what possessed me, but one night I thought I would get to know Anton a little better. I started by asking if he was single, which to me seemed like an innocuous question, but the very fact I was asking seemed to amuse him. He told me that he was having trouble finding a guy who wasn’t immediately turned off by all the ponies, and I made sure to snidely comment that he shouldn’t be going out with guys anyway even though it made my heart skip a beat when he said that, as well as mention that if he would just give up his collection there wouldn’t be an issue in the first place. I don’t know what I was expecting, but he asked me the same thing: how was my love life going, especially considering my new hobby? I couldn’t help but get flustered and start making excuses. I told him that there was no shortage of girls lined up to date me, but that I just wasn’t ready to make a commitment yet. I spun a whole story about how a girlfriend would only hold me back... I almost forgot that the standard that Anton accepted was completely different from my old teenage friends. He wasn’t impressed that girls were apparently lining up to get a piece of me... he just seemed amused that I thought such a thing was realistic, much less desirable. He didn’t understand that compulsive need to lie at all... he thought it would be better if more guys admitted that they were vulnerable. That was the first time I’d ever heard someone say something like that... I suddenly felt extremely exposed, and before I knew it my eyes were full of tears. My first instinct was to cover my face with my sleeve and hide my shame, but he was already firmly gripping my arm and holding it in place. He told me that I didn’t need to hide anything from him. He asked me if there was anything he could do to help me... and so for what felt like the first time in my life, I told the truth. It was supposed to be just to try it. I wasn’t expecting to actually enjoy it, I just thought that if I got it out of my system all of the unnecessary feelings would finally stop tormenting me... but all they did was grow stronger. I kept telling him that I was still looking for a girlfriend and that once I got one this whole arrangement would end, but eventually I realized that there was no point in lying to myself anymore. I wasn’t ever even sleeping in my own room anymore. I hadn’t so much as glanced at any dating websites in weeks. I was committed, whether I wanted to admit it or not... and I didn’t want to admit it. I only wish that I had told him how I really felt when I had the chance... One of the many things we started to share, which seemed the most inconsequential to me at the time, was a webpage. Anton was the owner of a small subreddit dedicated to My Little Pony fursuits, and he asked me if I would be willing to help him moderate. It wasn’t something I felt qualified to speak as an authority on, since even as I became more open about my love for ponies I still didn’t really feel connected to furry culture despite accompanying him to several conventions, but I was willing to do basically anything just to please him. My job was mostly to stop people from publicly “yiffing,” and although it was a grueling line of work it wasn’t thankless. Anton was a poet with words of affirmation. Many of the compliments he paid me were certainly undeserved, but they motivated me more than anything else ever had... but I got too zealous. There was a certain user on the server who for the sake of protecting privacy, we shall call XxLesbianRainbowDash69xX. As a member of the subreddit they were of course a brony and a furry, but what made them stand out was their dedication to the Flutterdash ship. They were constantly posting couple’s cosplays of themselves dressed as Rainbow Dash, but the Fluttershy in each picture was always different. They were also exceptionally sociable and aggressively tried to make friends with everyone on the tiny subreddit... Anton and I included. I wasn’t so keen on pursuing another friendship that could very well ruin my reputation, but of course Anton was immediately taken with the idea. The two of them exchanged contacts and hit it off instantly, and I started having trouble sleeping at night because he was awake in the early hours of the morning texting his friend in another timezone. He always paid me just as much attention as always during the daytime, but once he saw that his new friend was online he would crawl out of bed to go converse with them in another room. He was trying so hard to be considerate of me, and perhaps it was selfish for me to expect that I would always be able to sense his warmth and scent beside me while I slept... but at the time I was blinded by jealousy. One fateful morning, he excitedly woke me up to tell me that XxLesbianRainbowDash69xX had gifted him tickets to a major convention, and that the two of them were planning to cosplay Flutterdash together. He apologetically explained that he would be gone for a few days since the convention was halfway across the country, but sensing the disturbance within me he assured me that he could probably convince his friend to let me tag along as Applejack... she was always my least favorite. It didn’t matter what Anton said to encourage me, because I was never going to accept any consolation until this threat to our sacred relationship was eliminated. I had to find a way to get rid of XxLesbianRainbowDash69xX by any means necessary... In a fit of rage, I whipped out the ban hammer and beat my rival to death with it, metaphorically speaking. It was a blatant abuse of my privilege as a moderator and I am ashamed to admit it now... but at the time all that mattered was covering up the evidence. I knew I had to come up with an excuse for why I had banned them, so I added a new rule to the subreddit: Flutterdash was prohibited. The news was not met with acceptance from the other members of the community. To some more in the loop with the situation, it was obvious that I had only banned XxLesbianRainbowDash69xX because of a petty personal dispute, but others saw it as nothing but an unfair rule. I was accused of being biased towards other ships like Flutterchord or Appledash and that I needed to accept other people’s ship preferences, or even that I was homophobic and couldn’t handle the thought of lesbian characters in my favorite show. Chants of “mods are gay” could be heard across the subreddit from all sides of the debate, and everyone was rallying for Anton to remove me as a tyrannical moderator. Sound familiar? I can’t help but notice some similarities between my situation and Mo the one over at Kristahlia Week... maybe that is why the drama captivated me so. Anton tried to reason with me, bless his heart, but at this point I had completely devolved back into my screaming teenager mentality to cope with all the rejection. He was obviously disappointed in me for what I had done but he had no reason to believe it would ruin us... he couldn’t have handled it better. It really was my fault that things happened the way they did, but I refused to take accountability. What I told him still haunts my conscience to this day, even six years later. I told him that I never loved him, and that I was only using his companionship to fulfill my carnal desires. I told him that I didn’t care about what he did with his life as long as he didn’t do anything that kept him away from me. I even told him that I still thought he was disgusting and embarrassing. And the worst thing is... in that moment I meant every word. I was so selfish... I genuinely forgot that I loved him and treated him like he only existed to serve me. My actions were truly despicable and I deserved to suffer for it... and I did. For the first time, I saw Anton cry. I should have been there to comfort him like he did for me on that fateful night, but instead I let him run out of the house to go suffer by himself. By the time I realized how horrible I was acting, it was too late. He had disappeared into the night, never to be seen again. I came home the next day to discover all the ponies in the apartment finally gone... isn’t that what I had wanted? My moderator status on the subreddit had been stripped away, and I had been banned by all of the members of the group on nearly every social media platform. Another classmate later informed me that Anton had transferred to a different college... and that was the end. I have no idea what happened to him after that, but I can only hope he is doing well. Instead of taking this as an omen that I should improve my behavior, I began to become even more bitter than I was before I met Anton. I acted like my relationship with him was just an experimental phase that was doomed to fail from the start, and soon I was denying that it ever even happened at all. I convinced myself that the problem in our relationship was that I wasn’t supposed to be with men, and so I began to insist that I was straight and aggressively seek out relationships with women just to prove it to myself. I also started searching for strict moral codes that could give direction to my life... which is when I found the Church. I was attracted to their beliefs because they gave a very clear outline for how someone’s life should go and promised ultimate happiness to anyone who could fulfill the requirements, so I began to obsess over meeting those requirements. I wanted a Christian wife that could bear me many children not because that is how I wanted to live my life, but because that is how other people wanted me to live my life... and all I wanted was for others to tell me I was doing something right. The congregation was distrusting if me at first, and although they never said it to my face I know it was because they were aware of my past. Hardly a woman would come near me, and looking back on it I can’t say I blame them. The ones who were desperate enough for a husband to give me a shot were quirky repulsed by my egotistical behavior, which certainly didn’t help my reputation. Throughout all this, I still somehow told myself I was the victim because I didn’t want to admit that I had become the villain again. For a long time, the only person in the parish who would willingly hold a conversation with me was Lana. She was a fellow member of the choir and a devout believer in God, but she was often judged by the rest of the congregation for being an open lesbian despite her faith. She tried to convince me on several occasions that I didn’t have to perform any sort of identity to impress anyone and that I should “just be myself,” but I insisted that I knew what I was talking about. Eventually, she decided my well-being wasn’t her responsibility and gave up on trying to reason with me, but nonetheless she still treated me more kindly then many of the other churchgoers. I believe that my “dark past” is what drew Gabriella to me in the first place. She likely hoped that we could act as covers for each other until she figured some way out of her situation, but unfortunately I was too far gone to be of any help. I convinced myself that she was really in love with me and that she would be walking down the aisle soon enough. Whether or not I was really interested in her or just interested in what she represented I’m still not sure... but she truly was a wonderful person who didn’t deserve to have to suffer through my baggage. When she left me I was truly devastated... so much so that I even began to go through another crisis of belief that I recorded on this very blog. All I have to add is that I no longer bear any resentment towards Lana or Gabriella, and only wish them the best of luck. My relationship with Krissy began almost immediately after my breakup with Gabriella. I was desperate to regain the status I supposed that I had lost along with my girlfriend, so I latched onto the first woman who showed me any sort of positive attention. Her death and my downward spiral are all well-documented on this blog. I didn’t want to blame myself for her passing as well, so I developed a conspiracy to rationalize the whole ordeal. I even tried to act like a completely different person to try to keep the blame as mentally distant from myself as possible, but that didn’t work either. In the end, this is my cross to bear alone. So that brings us to now. What will become of allygodot? The truth is, I don’t know and quite frankly I don’t think that is the most important thing right now. I realized last night when I was looking at that art of Diego and Godot as Happy Tree Friends characters that I desperately wanted to be anyone other than myself... it really opened my eyes to the level of repression that had been burdening me since the incident six years ago. I realized that if I wanted to change, sitting around and thinking about how things could hypothetically be different isn’t going to do anything. If I want to make progress and truly become a better person, I’m going to have to act better, not just tell myself that I am. From now on, I will be defining myself on my actions and not my beliefs, as wise man once said. I hope that soon, I will have become a good enough person to meet Anton face to face again... I still love him after all these years, and even though I expect that he justifiably won’t want anything to do with me anymore, I still think that it is a guilt that needs to be resolved. If I ever come back to this blog, it’ll be as a different Adam to the one you thought that you knew. It’ll be as the Adam I’m trying to become... the true Adam that I know exists deep within me... Not allygodot, but as proudgodot. My name is Adam, but people online call me Coffee or Godot. I’m a 27 years old former music student living in Green Bay, Wisconsin. I am bisexual. My main interests are Ace Attorney, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, and My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.

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mymelodyheart · 4 years

Text

Miles Between Us Chapter 7 ~All In A Day's Work~

WARNING: MILD SEXUAL CONTENT

Previously in A Wrinkle of Time

"You have my blessings. Conditions are, there should be once a week phone-calls. Video or facetime ones or whatever you call it. And when I'm on British soil ..."

Jamie suddenly straightened up on his seat. "We'll visit, or ye can come and stay with us."

Quentin shot up on his feet. "Very well then, welcome to the family, Fraser. Go and get your dinner ...you wouldn't want your wife ..." he coughed, his face turning red. "...I mean your girlfriend reheating what she's just lovingly made."

Jamie got up as well, ready to shut the laptop, relief and confusion at the sudden turn around washing over him in waves. What the fuck just happened? Too bewildered for words, "Of course," was all he could muster.

Quentin hesitated, as if in search of the right words, his throat working overtime. When he finally spoke, Jamie couldn't help but hear the emotion in the older man's voice. "If Claire's father was alive today, he would think his daughter has made a fine choice."

His jaw dropped involuntarily. "He would?"

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Claire sat at her desk in her newly built writing studio, contemplating what to do about Thomas Christie next. For the past couple of days, she'd attempted to reach the elusive blogger by all means of communication: phone calls, email, comments on his posts and private messages in his Instagram and blog account. But her efforts, to her frustration, were to no avail. She'd even asked around the village for information on his whereabouts, but each answer led to nowhere. Though he had a resident address, it's quite apparent he wasn’t in. She'd thought of asking Jamie for help but decided not to. It was her project, and she's determined she would accomplish it with her own research skills.

Sighing, she leaned back against her seat and stared at the ceiling. Her boss, John, was counting on her to convince Christie to publish with Dreamweaver Publishing, and so far, she had nothing to show. Looking out the window facing the open fields, her gaze settled on the tractor bumpily navigating a small ragged lane, the rumbling of the engine soundless. She smiled. True to his words, Jamie had more than adequately soundproofed her workspace, shutting out any distracting noise. But with no sign of life from Christie, her work had been brought to a standstill.

Ah, hell! Claire glanced at the time. It was already mid-morning, and she'd been sat there staring blankly at Christie's blog all morning. What to do, what to do? She switched tabs on her browser and looked at his Instagram account, and realised he'd just posted a photo circa a minute ago. She decided to strike while he was online and send a message. Go for it, Beauchamp! With huge calming breaths, she rolled her shoulders and began to type, her fingers flying over the keyboard.

Hello Mr Thomas Christie. My name is Claire Beauchamp from Dreamweaver Publishing Company, London. I have been trying to reach you for the last couple of days to offer you a proposal that may be of interest to you. Some time ago, we came across your blog, and after having read through the content, we've come to realise it has an enormous potential to become the ultimate guidebook to the Scottish Highlands in print. Your knowledge, passion, and enthusiasm for Scotland and your keen eye for photography have captured the public interest, our company and myself included. We'd love to assist you in reaching your highest potential and expanding an even broader following should you be interested in authoring a book. I will be in Broch Mordha for the next few days if you wish to speak to me in person, and I will be more than delighted to explain the details. Any feedback you can give me at this point would be highly appreciated. Best regards, Claire.

Thinking Christie would appreciate the option, she included her phone number and her professional email address and then clicked send. After going over her message, she randomly liked his posts and commented on a recent photo for good measure, hoping it would be enough to get his attention. Oh, please answer this time!

Satisfied for now she'd done everything she could, she decided to make a coffee. She was just about to get up when her phone rang, making her jump in the process. Oh, sweet Mother of God! She must be more on edge than she thought. Clearing her throat, she gingerly tapped the answer button on her screen.

"Hello?" she squeaked. Damn it! I sound weird.

"Miss Beauchamp?" a deep, heavily accented voice answered. "Thomas Christie here."

"Mr Christie! You called!"

"Please, call me Tom. I'm no' much for convention and formalities. May I call ye Claire? If that's alright."

"Of course," she smiled, regaining back some semblance of composure. She'd already prepared a presentation in her head, but looking back now, it sounded like a pitch from a realtor selling a million-pound property. She reminded herself, Thomas Christie was a nature buff and liked to live an uncomplicated life, if not minimally, when travelling around Scotland in his restored Westfalia Volkswagen Camper. If she'd learned anything from his posts, it was that he wouldn't be easily persuaded with a promise of fame and monetary gain. There's no option but to start improvising.

"I heard a pretty lass was looking for me," he drawled with a hint of amusement in his voice. "I was informed ye were asking around. At first, I thought ye might have been from the council trying to get hold of me because of my unpaid council taxes. If that had been the case, I would have made an exception and come and paid my dues after seeing the photo my mate has taken of ye. Shame it wasn't a better close-up."

"Photo?"

"Aye, photo. My mate took it when ye werenae looking and sent it to me. Ye are bonnie, I must admit."

"Oh!" Holy, is he flirting? Claire wouldn't be surprised. This man's charms had drawn quite a lot of female fans to his site, and it was apparent that he's attempting to weave it on her. He probably thrived in his devotees' admiration, making him aware of his own appeal. This kind of cocksure behaviour wasn't a novelty, so she ignored the teasing but attempted to maintain a fairly laidback attitude. "Well, as you can see, I'm not from the council. And if I were, I wouldn't be making a noise about it now, would I?"

He laughed out loud. "You're right. So, what can I do for ye, Claire?"

"Have you read my message?"

"I have," he said quietly. "But I want to hear from ye why ye think my blog would be good enough to be published."

"Well, as I said, your passion and enthusiasm for Scotland are very apparent in your writing. Your words are ... how shall I say it, so visceral. But I'm not going to lie, though. We would need to make a lot of adjustments before we could present it to the mass. A bit of tweaking here and there and ..."

"Tweaking? I thought ye liked my work as it is?"

"Oh, I do," she said hurriedly. "You misunderstood. We wouldn't want to take the essence out of your writing. It's just a process every book has to go through before it's published. Like polishing your sentences, making them smooth and clear, ensuring that they don't have unnecessary phrases and repetition. And of course, there's the design and typesetting ...oh, well, that's for much later on. It's all standard drill in the publishing process."

"I see ..."

When a long silence lapsed, she checked her phone screen to make sure they were still connected.

"Tom?"

"Aye, I'm still here." He took a huge deep breath. "And what's yer role in this, Claire?"

"I'm the editorial assistant for Dreamweaver, and I'm here to make this proposal and answer all your questions."

"Right ...Weel, ye see, this is my concern. I'm an avid book reader, and while I'm pleased with all the attention my online journal is getting, I highly doubt that my writing would make it among the best selling list, let alone would anyone, for that matter, be too giddy with excitement to buy it. So what's all the fuss?"

The ambiguity in his voice wasn't lost on her. He may be this self-assured, nature-loving, nonconformist bloke as he'd portrayed on his online travel journal. But clearly, some of that attitude needed to rub off on his self-belief for his art.

"Oh, but that's where you're mistaken," she reassured. "My boss, John Grey, is totally sold with the idea of your adventure stories around Scotland, and he thinks with the proper structural development, design and marketing, it would be a hit. Especially with your fans. The concept is refreshing, and it would be different from any travel guides out there. And besides, it would be an excellent boost for Scottish tourism."

He made some muffled noise and then cleared his throat. "What about ye?"

"What about me?"

"Are ye sold on the idea of my blog?"

Part of John's faith in this book's promising prospect clung to Tom's admirable physical qualities. But for her, that wasn't the main selling point.

She straightened up from her seat and leaned over her laptop. With a flick of her wrist, she brought her computer to life and right there on the screen was his Instagram account. She remembered John's words, Sell him the dream! But she didn't need reminding. Tom may not be the most proficient writer, but his contents were great, especially the picturesque panorama photos. She read a few snippets of his post and smiled.

"Tom ...this opportunity Dreamweaver is offering you would be great exposure for your travel journal. By publishing it in print, you'll be able to reach a broader audience. Your knowledge of this wonderful place is beyond incredible from flora to fauna, the lands' history, the weather phenomenon that can only be termed as typically Scottish ...the whole package is simply amazing. Your passion and enthusiasm for this place make me want to go on that adventure you so love ��" She inhaled deeply, searching for the right words. "And I know deep in my guts your future readers would feel the same way. And that's what a great travel book should do, great adventure stories that inspire readers and challenge them to step outside the comfort zone ...even for a little while. This is the kind of book that could encourage people to explore, make them realise that escape from the daily drudgery doesn't mean expensive trips halfway around the world, and that adventure can be found in one's own backyard or a few miles trip down the road. I say you should share this with the world. And to answer your question ...yes, I'm totally sold."

She was out of breath by the time she finished, so she leaned back on her seat and crossed her fingers, hoping for a positive outcome. It was all now down to Tom. She didn't want to push, but the longer the silence between them went on, the more she felt like she was forcing him into a snap decision.

Ah, hell! "Look, Tom, there's no need to decide right now. You have my number. Why don't you think about it for now and call me up when you've made a decision. How about that?"

"I have a better idea. How about we discuss this further in person before I decide? Let's say ...over a dinner date?" he suggested in a low voice.

The word date resounded loudly in her ear. Oh, dear, God!

She needed to play this right without making it look like she was turning him down. Hoping for the best, she laughed nervously. "Of course, it only seems fair to meet first in person before you decide." She swallowed hard and squeezed her eye shut. "But I would hardly call it a date. We can meet at the Inn's pub in the village square and professionally discuss everything over lunch if that's alright. And just to be clear, I already have a boyfriend."

"Ah, damn!"

She flinched. "Oh, dear!"

He laughed. "Relaxed, Claire. I get it. Ye're taken, and I'm no' surprised. But ye cannae blame a lad for trying, could ye?"

"N-no, of course not ..."

"So business lunch it is then. I'm away for a few more days, so ye have to wait a bit more. I'll give ye a ring when I get back. How's that?"

Yess! She made an effort not to sound too relieved. "That's perfect, Tom! I'll see ye in a few days!"

"Great!" Then the line went dead.

She let out a massive sigh of relief. So damn close! Feeling elated at the outcome of their conversation, she shot to her feet and did a happy dance. She couldn't wait to call John and tell him everything. If she did her work well and laid out all the finer details of the publishing process and projected outcome, she knew Tom wouldn't be able to turn down the proposal. Invigorated, she immediately went back to work and began typing her outline. Ah, life is good!

..........

Jamie killed the chainsaw engine and pulled down his safety goggles when he caught sight of Jenny's car approaching. He had a bird's eye view of the driveway from the tree and could see everyone's coming and going. What the bloody hell is she doing here? She didn't usually come to job sites; nevertheless, he decided to come down since it was nearly lunch break. Wondering why her visit couldn't wait until work was done for the day, he gripped on to his harness and made a slow descent.

His sister got out of the car, stopping to greet some of the workers and subtly launching glares at him. Alertness immediately snapped in Jamie's shoulders as he realised something was up.

He dropped to the ground, his work boots landing on a combination of mulch and wood chips debris. As he laid down his chainsaw, he watched his sister approach and noticed the forced smile she had for the workers a few seconds ago, waning from her face. He braced himself as he waited for her to say something, unease slithering like a snake up his spine. This was definitely not a friendly visit.

"What's this I hear, ye havenae been attending therapy?" she hissed. "Have ye gone, daft?"

He glanced above Jenny's head to see if anyone was watching them before glowering down at her. "For fuck sake, Jen, ye're no' my ma," he said in a low voice. "Whatever's about to spew out of yer mouth, this is no' the time nor the place for this."

"Ach aye? Wait till ma hears about ye missing yer therapy!"

"Oh, what's this? We're back in primary school or what? Rushing off to ma to tell her everything. Why cannae ye give ma and me a break, eh?"

"The therapy is for yer own good!"

"I'm fine, Jen! I told ye that many times! What part of 'I'm fine' cannae ye understand?"

"Ye've been telling everyone that all yer life. Everything's fine ... I'm fine ... dinnae fash," she mimicked his voice, her face scrunching up. "Ye say that all the time even when, in actual fact, most of the time ye werenae. So why do ye suppose I dinnae believe ye?"

Jamie looked up at the sky and let out a massive breath. "Aye, there's truth to what ye say. But this time ...I swear, I've never felt better."

"Bloody hell! All this time, I thought ye've been attending therapy. I wouldnae have known if Geneva hadnae asked after ye."

"Weel, if ye'd asked, I would've told ye!"

"No, you wouldnae. And that's always been yer problem."

Christ, why can't she just shut up? He glanced up and noticed his men were looking towards them now. He tugged at the neck of his shirt and winded his head. "Jenny, stop! I cannae do this right now."

His sister stepped forward and was right at his face. "Ye think I'm telling ye off for fun? Weel, here's the news. Everyone wants the best for ye, but ye dinnae care, do ye? Ye're acting like one selfish prick!"

"Jenny ..." he warned, feeling hot and cold all at once.

"No, dinnae Jenny me ..."

"Jenny, shut up! I cannae ..."

"Ye could've at least had Geneva assessed ye. Is that too much to ask?"

Jamie shut his eyes. When he opened them again, he realised Jenny's voice had become distorted, and the grating sound of the stump grinder and helicopter whirring above his head grew more punctuated. Without a hint of warning, a bomb suddenly detonated inside Jamie, and his world began to move in slow motion. Seeing nothing but red, he was only vaguely aware that his angry bellow brought everyone in the vicinity to a standstill.

"What the fuck, Jamie!"

Jamie came to his senses when an arm landed across his chest. He realised Willie was standing between him and Jenny. He glanced at his sister, and her expression caused something inside of him to still. He looked down and saw his fists were two rocks, shaking as if prepared to do some severe damage. Oh, God!

"Jenny ...Willie ..." Jamie whispered. "I ...ah ..."

Hands curled up under her chin, Jenny's eyes were as big as saucers, and she looked terrified. Of me? His heart nosedived to his boots so swiftly, he wondered how he remained upright. The fury evaporated in an instant, and all that remained was shame. He'd felt that kind of guilt before but never with enough punch to knock the air out of his lungs. For crying out loud, this is my sister. What was I thinking?

"Jen ..." He attempted to reach out to his sister, but Willie's arm restrained him. Realising the cause of his older brother's concern, he forced his fists to unfold, aware of Willie watching closely. "I'm so sorry. Oh, Christ, I wasnae gonnae hurt ye," he rasped. "I could never lift a hand to ye. Ye must know that."

He swallowed a lump when Willie appeared reluctant to let him go. But Jenny patted their brother's arm, nodding to let them know she was alright. When Willie took a cautious step back, Jamie immediately gathered his sister into his arms and cradled her against his chest.

"Jen ...forgive me. I didnae mean to shout," he said thickly. "Ye ken I wouldnae physically hurt ye, aye? For Christ sake, ye're my sister, and I love ye. Ye looked so frightened. I couldnae bear the way ye looked at me ..."

"Jamie ...I wasnae scared of ye ..." Jenny whispered. "I was scared for ye."

He pulled slightly away and searched her face. "What do ye mean?"

"Even though ye've been to war, I ken ye dinnae like fighting and violence. Ye abhorred it. I was scared ye might do something ye might regret and make yer condition worse. I dinnae want that for ye."

Jamie stared down at her. "Jenny ..."

"Look, Jamie. It was my fault. I shouldnae have pushed knowing yer condition, and ye ken what my temper is like when it gets out of control. It's like ..."

"Like mine ..." Jamie finished off for her. Drawing her once more into his embrace, they stood like that for a while. Soothing, apologising and hushing each other.

Willie stared at them and shook his head in disbelief, mumbling a sequence of profanities. It wasn't the first time he'd seen their outburst with such intensity. But it was probably the first time Jamie had seemed out of control. Reassured that peace had been restored, for the time being, Willie spun around and left them alone. Exercising his authority at their workers, the older Fraser barked warnings that gossip coming from their workplace would not be tolerated and anyone found guilty would be subjected to an immediate suspension. And with that, he stomped off, leaving them all to stare at his disappearing form in shock.

..........

"There ye are," a deep voice mused.

Claire jumped, making her slam the fridge door and Adso bolt out of the kitchen. She took a deep breath before turning around.

"Jamie! You're home early. I was just about to prepare dinner."

"Willie didn't need me for the rest of the afternoon, so he sent me home early." His chest was bare and heaving and glistening with sweat. He must have taken off his top as he came in. "I ran all the way from work. I think I may have far too much energy," he explained, slowly approaching her. His hand reached out and placed it behind her neck, and drew her in for a slow wet kiss, knocking the air out of her lungs. His other hand slid under her sweatshirt and squeezed her breast. "Tell me, what am I suppose to do about it, Sassenach."

She pulled away from him and scrunched up her nose. "Jamie! You're dirty."

"And here I thought ye like me dirty." There was no amusement in his tone, and his bunched jaw told her he was on edge or maybe stressed?

"Why don't you take a shower while I make us something to eat, or better still, how about a bath to help you relax? I'll even bring you a beer," she suggested, feeling a tad concern as she eyed him questioningly.

"How about ye come and have a shower with me," he wheedled, tugging her closer.

She drew away and took a step back. "Jamie, I've just had one, and I'm all clean."

"No' a problem. I can get ye dirty in no time." Jamie hauled her into his arms as she tried to dodge. Squealing, she slapped his chest. Once more, his hands wandered, causing a tingling sensation to coast all over her body. "There we go, ye're as dirty as me now." Pressing himself against her, he inhaled her hair as his breath came faster, fingers twisting in the hem of her top. "Ye definitely need a shower now." he gritted.

Laughing, she peered up at his face, and what she saw made her do a double-take and swiped the smile off her lips in an instant. Oh, sweet Mother of God, he looks worse for wear. Something must have happened at work. Didn't he say Willie sent him home? Looking closely, she noticed he looked weighed down with need, and it wasn't just the sexual kind. It was something more and urgent. He'd had almost the same look the other night when he woke up from a fitful sleep, but she hadn't pushed to find out. His hands were all over her now, frantic and desperate like he was trying to grasp onto something to anchor himself, his breathing becoming more shallow and harsh, and his eyes beginning to glaze.

"Jamie stop! Stop right this second."

He immediately stilled and loosened his grip, shame marring his face. "Ach Christ, Sassenach, did I hurt ye? I did, didn't I? Tell me! Oh, dear God ..."

He was about to turn away, but with her hands, she forced his pained face to look at her, a moan barely subdued in his throat. She could already read what was going on through his head. No way would she stand by and let him take any blame, feel shame or guilt. Not this time. And not anymore. He'd made mistakes like everyone else and would continue to make them, but he needed to believe he was a good soul. This had to stop now. "Look at me, James Fraser," she demanded in a firm voice. "Look at me! Whatever is going through that damn mind of yours, don't you even bloody dare entertain it. Are you listening to me?"

"Sassenach ..."

"No, Jamie! I don't know what happened to you today, but let me tell you this ...shit happens all the time, alright? And sometimes we don't get to have any control over it. That's just the way it is. Tonight we're going to talk, even if it takes the whole bloomin' night. But first ..." Before she could change her mind, she stepped away from him and yanked off her top and pulled her leggings down. When she was fully naked, she took his hand and laid it on her bare breast. "Take whatever you need, Jamie."

He baulked. "Sassenach ...ye shouldnae want this in my state. It's wrong. I-I was too rough. I could have hurt ye." His voice sounded hollow and agonised.

"But you didn't."

He palmed her breast. "Christ, do I have a shred of decency left?"

"Do you love me?" she asked, undoing his jeans button. She saw he was already highly aroused and his skin covered in goosebump.

"With all of me," he groaned when she pulled down his zipper. "And ye ken that."

Determination licking through her veins, she stood on her tiptoes and spoke into his ear, her hand sliding inside his jeans to caress the ridge of his hardness. "If that's the case, what we're about to do is not wrong."

A voice raced through her consciousness, telling her this was the way forward. She knew he needed his control back before he would be able to speak to her. So she got down on her knees and pulled his pants down.

When he wrapped her hair in his fist and tilted her head back, she smiled. "Now, let's get dirty and exorcise those pesky brain chatter, shall we?" Before he could reply, she took him full in her mouth and worshipped him with her love, absorbing every frustrated growl that ripped from his throat and every emotion that poured out of him with every roll of his hips.

She pushed him to the edge and over until he found his release, and his loud cries echoed in the air. When he shattered around her, his body slumped onto the floor and into her arms.

Claire knew they had a long night ahead of them, so she cradled him, waiting patiently for his breathing to calm. Later after she bathed him, they would talk, but for now, she was contented just to hold him a little while longer, as she wondered how many of Jamie's demons she would have to slay tonight and if love would be enough to conquer his hell.

Dear Readers,

Thank you all for your feedback from the previous chapter. I know it was a bit deep and dark, but I really did want to do Jamie's condition justice, and I must admit, I probably got carried away putting so much emphasis into it. But that's just me, I guess.

And as for the latest instalment, I hope you enjoyed it. Please let me know what you think. I must admit it is moving a bit slow, but it's a necessary move to pull this story together as I cover loopholes and grounds. One day, you'll understand the logic behind it.😀 So have patience, my friends - all in good time. Stay safe for now and take care until next time. X

#melodyheart #wonderwall #milesbetweenus #ClaireBeauchamp/JamieFraser #claire beauchamp #jamie fraser #outlanderfanfic

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robininthelabyrinth · 4 years

Note

*snicker* Prompt: Where the Nie sect are all (secretly?) werewolves, and 'qi deviation' is code for 'stuck in/refusing to resume human form'.

“Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang said, poking his head in through the door to where Nie Mingjue was entertaining his sworn brothers. “I know I said I was going shopping, but I’ve changed my mind; I’m going to go have a picnic up the mountain.”

Nie Mingjue nodded his consent, and Nie Huaisang disappeared with a yelp of joy.

“I’m surprised you didn’t make him tell you what mountain,” Lan Xichen laughed. “It’s not as if Qinghe is short on them.”

“I’m surprised Huaisang agreed to go outside, especially instead of shopping,” Jin Guangyao put in with a smile.

“There’s only one mountain that matters,” Nie Mingjue said absent-mindedly. “And one of the family must have come to visit.”

“Family?” Jin Guangyao asked, lowering his head as if his interest hadn’t been piqued. The main branch of the Nie sect rather infamously consisted of just the two brothers, although the extended family was fairly large – though he’d never known either brother to make time especially for them. “What family?”

“Distant ones,” Nie Mingjue said shortly, and changed the subject.

Naturally, after a dodge like that, Jin Guangyao had to follow up.

“Who are you going to visit?” he asked Nie Huaisang.

“Great-uncle Lu!” Nie Huaisang said happily. “It’s been years since I last saw him.”

“I’m sure he’ll be impressed with how much you’ve grown,” Jin Guangyao teased. “Will he bring lots of presents from his travels?”

“Oh, he doesn’t travel,” Nie Huaisang said, and – what? How could not have seen Nie Huaisang for years if he lived in the area? Was there some sort of familial infighting Jin Guangyao wasn’t aware of? “And he doesn’t really do presents much – though he’s always very thoughtful about bringing lots of food.”

“Well, that’s something,” Jin Guangyao said faintly. Bringing food, as opposed to snacks to share, seemed rather rude to him, implying that Qinghe couldn’t act as a proper host – but Nie Huaisang was clearly very enthusiastic. “What’s he like, your great-uncle?”

“His temper’s even worse than my brother’s,” Nie Huaisang said, and that put a quick end to any thought Jin Guangyao might have had about asking to join in the visit.

Still, the curiosity was killing him.

“Don’t you think it’s strange?” he asked Lan Xichen, who blinked at him. “That it’s a great-uncle, I mean. I thought most Nie cultivators died young.”

“They also have children young,” Lan Xichen pointed out, but frowned thoughtfully. “I haven’t heard of any great-uncle before now, though. Did he mention a name?”

“Just ‘Lu’.”

“Huh. Da-ge once mentioned a Great-Uncle Lu, but it can’t be that one – he was apparently famous in Nie family lore for having a, uh, particularly explosive qi deviation, I think is how he put it…”

Jin Guangyao did not especially want to consider what that might have looked like. “Probably a different one,” he agreed. “Did you give Huaisang that fan you wanted to give him?”

“Oh no, I forgot!” Lan Xichen exclaimed, as Jin Guangyao had expected, and from that point it was fairly easy to convince him that they should just pop in on Nie Huaisang’s picnic to give it to him.

They find Nie Huaisang fairly easily, right in the middle of setting up a big fire for roasting; he was delighted to get the fan, and spent several minutes questioning Lan Xichen about the origins and meanings and artist while Jin Guangyao looked around for clues about the mysterious great-uncle.

He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but there was nothing at all – at least until the giant tiger swaggered out of the forest, dragging a deer by the haunch.

“Tiger!” Jin Guangyao exclaimed.

“Deer!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “Oh, wonderful; thank you, Great-Uncle! I haven’t had venison in weeks, what with us eating our way through the boar that da-ge brought down last month.”

Jin Guangyao’s sole consolation was that Lan Xichen looked as lost as he was.

The tiger, on the other hand, seemed very comfortable: it was massive, as large as a horse, and had somehow become covered in a light layer of green moss that made it look highly unusual. It threw its head to the side, tossing the deer onto the flames, and then used its paw to point at one of the jars of spice Nie Huaisang had prepared, and that was about when Jin Guangyao actually internalized that Nie Huaisang’s Great-Uncle Lu was, in fact, the tiger.

“How did that happen?” he asked, utterly fascinated. He’d always liked cats. There’d been a handful of strays that congregated behind the brothel; he would feed them any scraps that were fully inedible. He’d never met a tiger before. “He was human first, right?”

“Of course,” Nie Huaisang said, expertly butchering and then seasoning the meat as his great-uncle lounged on his side, watching contentedly. “It was…three generations back, I think? Maybe four? Not that long ago, anyway; he had a really epic qi deviation – it was big, hard to describe, almost –”

“Explosive?” Lan Xichen suggested.

“Yes! Exactly. Explosive.”

“I understand that much, but how did he turn into a tiger?” Jin Guangyao asked.

Nie Huaisang blinked at him. “I’m not sure I understand the question. I just told you: he had a qi deviation.”

“Are you saying that he turned into a tiger because of his qi deviation?” Lan Xichen asked, looking dazed.

“More or less,” Nie Huaisang said.

“It’s not ‘more or less’,” the familiar deep voice of their eldest sworn brother said from behind them. “It’s exactly so.”

Jin Guangyao pasted on a smile before turning, but for once Nie Mingjue didn’t seem to be in a bad mood – if anything, he didn’t even seem all that surprised at seeing them.

“Why do you think our tombs only have a place for sabers?” he asked, sitting down next to Nie Huaisang and assisting with the roasting. “Burying the sabers doesn’t mean that if there were bodies, we wouldn’t need to deal with them as well.”

“That makes sense,” Lan Xichen said, though he sounded a little doubtful.

Jin Guangyao thought about the tombs he’d seen – how many tombs there were, and all filled solely by sabers. No bodies. Not even remnants thereof.

“How often do Nies turn into tigers upon deviation?” he asked, starting to rapidly re-think his plan regarding the Song of Clarity. It would be an awful shame for him to succeed in planning the perfect murder, only to be mauled to death by a tiger shortly after completion. “All of them?”

“Now that one is ‘more or less’,” Nie Huaisang said triumphantly, and Nie Mingjue rolled his eyes at him. “Quite a few do, anyway, and almost always the ones in the main line, since they bear the heaviest burden. There’s a short period in which their body collapses – we take them away so they can transform in private, and announce the death before releasing them on the mountain.”

“…this mountain?” Jin Guangyao said, thoughts of giant packs of roving Nie ancestor tigers. Angry ones.

“We release them on this mountain, but they live on a celestial mountain that can’t be easily accessed,” Nie Huaisang said.

“Oh, like Baoshan Sanren,” Lan Xichen said, and both Nies abruptly looked extremely shifty. “Not – the same mountain?”

“…possibly,” Nie Mingjue allowed. “Not that we’ve ever met her in person, of course.”

“Of course,” Lan Xichen said blankly. “Not in person. Right.”

“Speaking of in person, what are you doing here, da-ge?” Nie Huaisang asked. “I thought you were too busy to go see Great-Uncle Lu.”

The giant green tiger across the fire growled pointedly at that.

“Sect business comes first,” Nie Mingjue informed the tiger. “And you’re not quite important enough to draw me away, Great-Uncle –”

The tiger bared its teeth.

“– but Grandmother Bai is.”

Nie Huaisang jumped to his feet. “Grandmother Bai is coming?!” he shouted, and even the green tiger looked deeply concerned by this news, insofar as tigers could look concerned – it got up and paced around, lashing its tail from side to side. “Why didn’t you say? I should put on something nicer –”

“I only just got word myself and came up as quickly as I could,” Nie Mingjue said, and then looked at Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao. “I’m afraid you should probably go.”

“Your grandmother has a temper, I’m guessing,” Jin Guangyao tried a weak joke.

He got a stern look in response, but Nie Mingjue was still opening his mouth to scold him when the earth shook. It was a good thing they were all sitting, or else they might have fallen.

It was a very temporary shake. Jin Guangyao would have assumed it was an earthquake if another shake hadn’t happened a few moments later, and then another after that –

“Are those footsteps?” he asked, horrified. “How large is your grandmother, anyway?”

“Uh, well, you know,” Nie Huaisang said, which was not an answer.

“A more important question,” Lan Xichen said. “You call your great-uncle ‘Lu’, presumably because he’s green. Does that mean you calling your grandmother ‘Bai’ mean she’s white?”

They both nodded, and Lan Xichen blanched in a way that Jin Guangyao didn’t understand.

“Da-ge, Huaisang,” Lan Xichen said, very slowly. “Are you telling me that your – that your ‘grandmother’ is the Baihu?”

The celestial white tiger? That would be ridiculous.

“We’ve never asked,” Nie Mingjue said. “It seemed like it would be rude.”

“And we don’t do rude with anyone that has teeth larger than Baxia,” Nie Huaisang agreed.

Jin Guangyao decided that his curiosity had been sated enough for one day.

#mdzs #nie huaisang #nie mingjue #jin guangyao #lan xichen #my fic #my fics #total crack #not going to lie #it'll make you feel better after reading the previous fic at least?#hamelin-born

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