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toxinellebug · 3 months

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Shadybug’s Taste of Revenge- A Menu of Miraculous Misuse

What was that old saying about revenge and a cold dish?

That sounded too much like a single serving.

After YEARS of torture, Marinette Dupain-Cheng was planning on serving Chloe Bourgeois an entire buffet!

Thanks to The Supreme’s generous gift, she was finally able to put the meal plan in motion.

That evil, selfish, racist brat would FINALLY get what’s coming to her, and Marinette would savor every moment…

After receiving her Miraculous, kwami servant, and a tablet listing rules she needed to follow,

(See this post here) Marinette had spent the days of her weekend compiling a list of everything Chloe had ever done, and how she wanted to pay her back.

She spent the nights testing her transformation and the abilities that came with it:

Standing still, she didn’t really feel any different. But as she moved, she noticed her body felt lighter, took far less effort for motion, and required little stamina.

Having a room with roof access made sneaking out easy. Still, she had to really hype herself up to make that first jump.

But it was worth it!

Parkour was as simple as a video-game; as if the suit could somehow sense what she wanted to do- leaping from roof to roof was a piece of cake, there wasn’t even any strain on her muscles. It was insane how fast she could run without feeling out of breath. Plus, for the first time in her life, instead of being a klutz who could trip over air, she was nimble and sure-footed as anyone in Les championnats de France Elite de gymnastique!

The Yo-yo had been trickier to get the hang of; she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t disappointed- The Supreme, most powerful force on earth, gives her magic earring that grant her super-human strength and agility… and a yo-yo? Based on its use, a grappling hook would’ve made more sense.

Maybe The Supreme had a weird aesthetic?

Whatever.

The Lucky Charm feature was far more interesting…

The first time she summoned it, it granted her a small, red and black polka-dotted, hand-held device with a green screen showing a grid map of Paris, and dozens of blinking dots that seemed to move around the arrondissements in a pattern.

After zooming in to look at specific streets it clicked in… This was radar. It was showing her the real-time Enforcer patrol routes!

Being caught outside of your residence after curfew was a serious violation for all citizens.

Enforcers diligently policed the city-keeping an eye out for deviants, vandals, and other would-be criminals who would dare leave their homes after dark.

In the list of rules The Supreme had sent her, it was made clear that she was NOT to be seen.

Rooftop travel would make it easy to avoid most of them, but if she wanted to scope out the layout and security features of both the school and the Grand Paris Hotel, it would be better to do so after Enforcers had already passed those areas, and leave before they came back.

The Hotel had pretty tight security, and not knowing to limits of her Lucky Charm, she decided the School was the best option to start, at least until she was more proficient with her powers.

———————

That 2nd week of school is dedicated to research and spying, and by Thursday, Marinette has a better grasp of Chloe’s schedule than her underling, Sabrina.

(C’mon, if Marinette in the Prime universe can have a pull down chart in her room with the schedule of the boy she likes- a boy who has a bodyguard and an overprotective father- then emoMarinette could easily figure out the schedules of people she hates.)

Friday morning she is up before dawn; she needs to get to school before it opens to put her plan in motion, then back home again in time to “wake-up” as Marinette to avoid raising suspicions.

(She does not have a super-villain name yet, since she believes no one will see her or talk to her, why would she need to give her transformed look a name?)

Transforming and swinging from rooftop to rooftop with her yo-yo means she can get to the school in less than 3 minutes.

Just in time; Custodian M. Haprèle has just arrived and is making his rounds to get Francois Dupont ready before the rest of the faculty arrives.

Avoiding a single man is easier than trying to sneak past several teachers and students.

She waits until he exits the door leading to the boiler room, his first task of the day- she knows that now he will go to unlock each room, turn on the lights and radiators, before he does a sweep of the main courtyard.

Being a private school, those tasks won’t take long, so she knows she must move quickly.

Even though M. Haprèle is unlikely to return to the boiler room until his routine inspection at the end of the day, she can’t risk being noticed leaving the room if he happens to be passing by.

The stairs lead to an eerie hallway that is thankfully lit, but only just so.

Her heart races when she spots the aqua glow of her prize; the school boiler.

Responsible for heating not only water, but regulating the temperature of every classroom.

It was like a big pressure-cooker, and she would use it to prepare the apéritifs of her revenge.

Pulling up her yo-yo and activating the smartphone feature (which was odd because who would she even call??) she did a quick internet image search for comparison in order to identify the expansion tank and the pressure valve.

Summoning her Lucky Charm gave her a red and black polka-dotted pipe-wrench.

Normal Marinette was weak, but with the strength her transformation gave her, she was able to turn the filling loop all the way on, and shut the pressure release valve off, and twist it impossibly tight.

She couldn’t help her self-satisfactory smirk; she’d just turned the school’s heating system into a ticking time bomb.

Step one was complete. Now to go home so Marinette could get ready for a very exciting day of school.

——————————-

It is in the middle of second class when it happens…

The classroom radiator whistles and hisses violently, releasing scalding hot steam into the room that fogs Mme. Mendeleiev’s glasses.

Shrieks can be heard from nearby classrooms, but they are soon drowned out by what could be mistaken as a crash of thunder.

Directeur Damocles activates the intercom system and orders to evacuate all students immediately!

Despite teachers insisting that everyone remain calm and to leave in an orderly fashion, there is panic; sobbing over steam burns, anxious questions over what’s happening, students shoving to get through the door first, either out of fear or excitement to get out of class, and over all the din there is a distinct banshee wail of a certain blonde threatening to have her daddy sue the school over what the burst of steam has done to her hair!

…No one notices Marinette slipping away to the locker room.

Confident she is alone, she transforms.

She knows she has to act quickly, so she starts with the easiest target; Sabrina Raincomprix’ locker.

C’est du gâteau! Sabrina is completely brainwashed into being Chloe’s slave, so naturally her locker combination is that witch’s birthdate.

(A day EVERYONE knows by heart since every year Chloe makes a big spectacle of bragging how amazing her party will be since she is so rich.

Naturally, anyone foolish enough to ask if they could be invited was laughed at and insulted for having such audacity.)

Chloe Bourgeois had never done her own homework in her life. That’s what underlings were for…

In Sabrina’s locker sat an entire weeks worth of homework for both her and Chloe, including a science report they needed to present to Mme. Mendeleiev- the most unforgiving teacher in school- and it was all due TODAY.

There was no time for Sabrina to re-do all of it for herself, let alone a separate, slightly different set for Chloe.

Not only would the teachers be upset over so much missing work, but even an airhead like Mme. Bustier would have to be a little suspicious that both girls claim to have lost all their homework.

How many times had Marinette’s grades suffered because those two stole her notes, vandalized her locker and its contents, or dropped her textbook into a toilet?

How many times did the teachers blame her for not paying attention in class, forgetting to do her work, or just being a total klutz because anytime she tried to tell them who was really at fault, it was always her word against Chloe and Sabrina’s?

How many times did everyone decide that Marinette’s word meant nothing?

There was no time to count.

Marinette had one more fish she wanted to frire for this course; Lê Chiến Kim.

Summoning her Lucky Charm this time got her a red and black polka-dotted stethoscope.

It had to be magic. That was the only way she could explain being able to use it to crack the combination on Kim’s locker even quicker than what Marinette had seen in movies.

The school swim team had a meet after school today, and Kim was prepared with all his gear in his locker, including his goggles which just so happened to have his name printed on the waterproof label on the strap.

The only thing Kim loved more than swimming was practical jokes.

Let’s see who will have the last laugh~

———————————

Directeur Damocles is NOT happy.

He’d had to call in both the Enforcers AND the Fire Department, and the school budget was going to suffer a major cut in order to pay for it.

(Remember, under The Supreme there is no socialism, so receiving any kind of service from the Fire Department or law enforcement will cost you, as mentioned here.)

The Boiler had over-pressurized and exploded.

Not only would it have to be replaced, but there was sure to be a lawsuit or two from the angry parents of students who had been unfortunate enough to be seated close to their classroom’s radiator.

Thankfully, any burns were superficial at worst, and after some quick first aid, Captain Hessenpy had assured them that a simple store bought ointment would be enough and redness would fade in a couple days.

Though that assurance would probably do little to appease the ire of some parents.

The drawbacks of being principal of a private school were undoubtedly all related to the students’ parents.

Everyone enrolled came from a family that was well off, and a good deal even had family’s with a degree of influence.

Even worse, nearly every student’s parents believed their child deserved only the very best, which is why they enrolled in Collège Françoise Dupont in the first place.

As such, an incident as large as this was unacceptable.

People would demand answers and for someone to be held responsible… Which could lead to the school being shut down!

Never mind losing his job, at this rate, Denis Damoclés would never find work in the field of education again!!

What if he was arrested for gross negligence? What if the debt for property damage and personal lawsuits was so overwhelming he had to spend the rest of his life in a penitentiary labor camp to work it off?!

No, this wasn’t his fault…

Fred Haprèle; HE was Gardien d'école!

It was HIS job to inspect the boiler before and after school.

If anyone should be held accountable for this disaster, it was him.

M. Damocles interrogates M. Haprèle without mercy; He checked the Boiler room this morning and everything was fine? HA! A likely story! As if he’d believe-

But he is interrupted by Enforcer Raincomprix;

After some investigation, a suspicious item was discovered at the scene of the explosion.

A pair of swimming goggles.

——————

What a beautiful day.

The kind of day that left you feeling nostalgic;

Marinette remembers that day last year all too clearly…

She had mustered all the courage she could wring out of her tiny body to ask Kim out.

She steeled herself for rejection.

She wouldn’t blame him- she was the biggest loser in school.

She expected him to say “hard pass”.

She hoped he would turn her down gently.

She thought he’d think it was a joke.

She never dreamed he’d say “yes”.

But he did, and she was on cloud nine!

On the bus she couldn’t help but imagine all the dates they would go on once the school year was over.

In her head, she was already designing the gift she would make for Kim’s next Birthday, and the gift she would make him for Valentine’s day, for Christmas, for his next next Birthday…

Not that she didn’t still have some jitters- there was always the chance that Kim would change his mind and she would be stood up. Or maybe he never intended to show up in the first place but had felt too awkward and put on the spot to say “no” to her face??

But all that anxiety melted away when she arrived at the pool and Kim was waiting for her with a smile.

They’d had so much fun! The most fun she’d had in a long time.

They played pool games, and Kim showed off his dives and made her laugh.

Marinette felt so comfortable with him.

He was so nice… In fact, he was the only one who’d ever been nice to her.

It seemed so perfect, she’d been so happy that she couldn’t help herself-

She let the words slip out;

“Je t'aime.”

Those words came back to bite her in the form of dozens of spiders, crawling up her arms, her shoulders, her neck, even down inside her swimsuit, and they were actually biting her!!

She screamed and flailed about, hopping like some kind of panicked chicken, swatting madly at her limbs and torso while Kim laughed hysterically, before she fell backwards into the pool.

Even as she sputtered and swallowed a mouthful of chlorinated pool water, she still instinctively clawed at her own body, still feeling dozens of tiny, itchy, little legs crawling all over her.

When she finally came up for air, Kim was still laughing, and he wasn’t alone- Chloe and Sabrina were there, snickering and recording the whole thing.

All Marinette could do was crawl out of the pool like a wounded animal and scurry away to the changing rooms to pray the earth would split open and swallow her up.

It didn’t.

Chloe posted the video online, and by the time Marinette managed to get home, it had already gone viral.

The last two weeks of school were filled with new nasty names and insults, there was even a contest where boys tried to see who could do the best impersonation of her freak-out.

Someone took the original video and made a remix, complete with clownish sound effects.

She was a walking meme.

She cried herself to sleep every night, wishing that she had drowned in that pool.

Not that anyone would care, but with enough bad press, they’d have to at least pretend like they were sorry.

Which is why Marinette wasn’t sorry at all when M. Damocles expelled Kim in front of the entire school.

The moment Enforcer Raincomprix read aloud the name on the strap of those goggles, students began to whisper.

Kim was well known for stupid dares and obnoxious pranks.

As far as everyone was concerned, the evidence was incriminating enough to justify M. Damocles decision and have Enforcers escort Kim off school grounds.

Whether it was enough to have Kim sent to maison de correction and have his family foot the bill for property damages, who could say?

It didn’t matter if it was enough to convict him or not; the accusation alone would tarnish his reputation forever.

Forget getting accepted into a University, no job would be willing to hire him, considering how many kids had important families who loved to gossip.

Kim would have to move to another city, maybe even another country!

(Marinette also couldn’t help but notice that a few of the students complaining of burns were the same who gave her particularly nasty nicknames last year, including “water-phobic retard.” That had to be the power of the Lucky Charm, right?)

It was savory and satisfying.

But Lê Chiến Kim was nothing more than a hors d'oeuvres, and Marinette was far from feeling full.

With Kim out of the way, she could now devote her time and extra care to people who really mattered.

Speaking of which….

Despite needing to get back home to run the register at the Bakery, Marinette was willing to risk her mother’s lecture in order to hang back after school to catch a lovely show-

After determining the premises was safe, students were allowed to return to classes, and the fruits of Marinette’s labor paid off.

Now, Chloe was screaming at Sabrina, actually smacking the ginger haired girl’s head with her designer purse, and accusing her of being useless, utterly useless!

Not only was Mme. Mendeleiev unwilling to extend the deadline for the science report, she was planning to call their parents to let them know their daughters have been slacking off in school.

AND IT WAS ALL SABRINA’S FAULT! How could she forget to bring their homework?! Why does she even bother to keep her around?!

(Mme. Bustier was also very disappointed, and concerned that both girls somehow forgot an entire week of homework. She is willing to extend her deadlines, but she will have to deduct points away from their grade for being tardy.)

Sabrina insists she didn’t forget! She had everything done and ready to be turned in! She had it all in her locker this morning!

Chloe isn’t interested in excuses, and says that if Sabrina is going to be this incompetent, she can easily be replaced.

This leaves the other girl sobbing, begging on her knees for another chance, swearing she’ll do better!

Yes, this was what would make it all worth it, and it was only the beginning!

These two had done far too much for their punishment to be a one-and-done.

They deserved to suffer slowly, steadily, having their misery increase little by little until they were the ones crying till their eyes were swollen shut, wishing they were dead.

The very thought made Marinette’s mouth water.

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toastyrobos · 5 months

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All of you (Echo x female reader one shot)

Warning: since it’s Echo: mentions of missing limbs and lack of self esteem, body image issues, etc. plus a bit suggestive towards end.

Word count: 2989

((Reader was a ex Jedi before order 66 and was in love with Echo. She was too afraid to tell him and missed her opportunity. Regretting it every day since the Citadel accident. Now she’s been hiding out, buying her time until things settle down. The last thing she expected to find on Ord Mantell is Echo. Alive. Overcome with grief and fear she’s reluctant to trust him or the team he’s with. And what will he do when he sees the person who has been at the forefront of his mind again after all this?))

Keeping your head down was easy. Staying focused was another story entirely. As a former 'safe keeper' as they once were called was difficult. Especially when you saw innocent people being tossed and shoved around by the troopers you once called friends.

It was a hard pill to swallow at first. Seeing the men you worked so closely with for years, had gotten together with at the 79..turn on their generals so easily. Like it was nothing. It was like a switch had been flipped. And that's exactly what it was.

According to Rex. After he located you and told you everything it was a devastating blow. Not only had the clones had their humanity stripped from them, but they had also had their minds violated. It was so cruel and too horrible to wrap your head around the very notion. But you did.

Eventually you had to move on. Jumping from planet to planet seemed like the most logical option. Staying in one place for too long tended to draw unwanted attention.

The long stretches of silence were the worst parts. Most of the time your thoughts drifted to him.

Echo.

The ex arc trooper.

His face was always present in your mind. His warm brown eyes, the rough patches of his freshly shaven chin, his smile. You missed him too much it hurt.

Even if you were a Jedi..ex before. Ex now. And attachments were forbidden, you still harbored feelings for him. It was difficult not to. He made you smile, laugh, and just had a wonder about him. He and Fives always managed to make you laugh. But it was Echo that held your heart.

It helped too, that out on the battlefield you two worked well together. To the point where you were able to read each other with a simple glance. You always did have the best time on missions with him. He would shower you with story after story about battles he witnessed. You loved his enthusiasm. You had loved being around him. You had just loved him.

But you never got the chance to tell him. The Citadel was his last mission, during which he was killed. He saved so many that day, but he wasn't able to safe himself.

You were never the same after that. It was like you were a shell of your former self. You felt nearly hollowed. You pushed through it until it was too much and you abandoned the order not long after. It was a hard decision to make, but your mind wasn't in a good place.

Not long after, order 66 happened and you had to take on a new identity. You had no choice. To the Empire you were still alive. You needed to lay low. Your black long hair had to go. Replaced with a short blonde cut. And you needed a job. One that couldn't be tracked.

That's how you ended up on Ord Mantell, working for Cid. An old contact of yours said she'd hire you no questions asked. It was worth a shot. She wasn't that bad. She paid decent and gave you a room in the back. It wasn't much, but you didn't mind. Your regal days as a Jedi we're long over anyway.

~~~

Sweat dripped down your brow as you made your day back to Cid's parlor. You had no problem going off world for a mission, but you had hoped she would be more forthcoming with what certain missions entailed. Specifically if you needed to dress lighter for a task that involved stepping foot on a lava planet. It was times like this you were glad that you had cut your hair.

Sometimes you missed it, but today was not one of those times.

"Next time Cid let me know if—" your voice died in your throat when your eyes saw them. Your breath hitched and you froze for a moment before rapidly whipping out your blasters and aiming it at the bunch of familiar clones. Fear and panic took hold of you while you stared them down. The young girl with them peaked her head out to see what was going to happen.

But your attention was fixed on the thought to be dead now very much alive ex arc trooper. Your hands trembled as your weapons stared them down.

It was not possible. You clutched your blasters tighter.

Your mind must have been playing a trick on you.

You must be hallucinating him.

Echo was dead. You read the reports.

But you...you knew his face. Knew his kind wonder filled eyes.

The very same eyes that stared starstruck back at you.

You were in disbelief over the nature that he was standing before you, very much alive. But you were also trembling. A fear so prominent in your eyes at the notion that they would hurt you. All clones could and would. It had quickly become a constant in your on the run life.

Still trying to find your voice you spoke again. "Stay back!" You ordered the group. You were not taking any chances. Not anymore. You had learned that mistake all too quickly.

"We're not going to hurt you". Hunter said, easing his hands up as to say we're not going to harm you. You shook your head, tears started to pool in your eyes.

Yes they were.

Echo was speechless. Drinking in your appearance after so long, relief flooded his lungs at seeing that you were still alive. It had been so long. But concern also made itself known. No doubt the blasters pointed at them, meant that you had heard rumors about the inhibiter chips. How could you have not? But you were not in any danger. No.

Both of you were too frozen to talk so it was up to the young blonde girl beside him to shatter the silence.

"Do you know her, Echo?"

That seemed to snap him out of his trance. "Y-yeah I do".

You nearly broke at hearing his voice. One of your blasters fell to the floor. The hand once holding it, shot up to cover your mouth. Your body was trembling. His voice....It still held patches of that warmth, that could sweep you up. But something about it seemed...off. No doubt from what he went through as your eyes took in his pale appearance.

He could feel your eyes roaming his figure. The cyber enhancements. His pale sunken in face. The dark circles under his eyes. And it made him avert his gaze. That saddened you.

"I'm Omega". The young girl introduced herself trying to ease the tension. Feeling a dampness on your cheeks, you hastily swiped your tears away. Then you kneeled down to her height, a nervous smile broke out on your face.

Not a single threatening thought or intention reflecting back at you as you met her eyes. Nor were there any in the others as you scanned them over. You slowly lowered your other weapon. Your body still in shock. They weren't going to hurt you. You could sense it. Feel it. He wasn't going to hurt you. He never could. Never did.

Knowing that he wasn't under the chips control anymore you nearly burst into tears.

He was okay

He was alive.

"It-it's nice to meet you, Omega". You managed to choke out, still in shock and in disbelief that Echo was alive.

"Mega, let's give them a moment". Hunter said ushering Omega back to them. It was clear to him that these two needed to talk. He had heard the stories from Echo about you. Had met you on several occasions and found you to be a skilled Jedi and someone that Echo cared for deeply. He already felt like he knew you in some way.

The others followed behind him into the back. Leaving just you and Echo standing completely still at the bar. The only sounds coming from the humming slot machines and buzzing lights. You stood up from the ground.

Your eyes fell once again on the ex arc trooper. He looked so different, appearance wise, but his aura was still the same. Brave, loyal, kind, warm...he was still the Echo you had known. Even beneath his now pale, near white skin and sunken cheeks he was still the Echo you loved.

You wanted to ask what happened, but judging by the uncomfortable expression across his face and the missing limbs you weren't sure if you should have. You didn't want to push him to remember it.

"It's okay". His sudden soft voice startled you.

You hesitated, but eventually you asked and he told you everything. Every gruesome, awful and horrible detail of his capture. It broke your heart to hear what the man you loved went through. What he had to endure for so long. What he lost. And what that had cost him.

The next time you saw Rex you would be sure to thank him a million times. Telling him how grateful you were that he pushed so hard to get Echo back. And when you saw clone force 99 again, you would let them know just how much them going in blindly to rescue Echo meant to you.

You didn't realize you had been crying until Echo's only hand reached out and wiped your tears away with his thumb. The gentle carcasses of his textured glove sent sparks down your spine. Before he realized what he was doing and tried to pull away, you gripped his hand between yours, dragging your fingers over his knuckles. The gesture causing his cheeks to dust a light shade of pink.

"I-I just can't believe your alive". Your voice crumbled as you spoke. "When the others came back and told me what happened I-I was so broken. It was so hard to believe that you were gone. And now..." There were no words to express the happiness you felt that he was here.

He sighed. "I know".

Seeing what his death did to the women he loved pained him greatly. If only he had told her. Confessed that he loved her before he went to the Citadel. Maybe that would have changed things. Or maybe not.

The outcome would have been the same. He was a solider and it was his duty to fight for the Republic. Sacrifice himself if need be. After all clones were replaceable.

He would only ever be that. And now he was a broken one. More machine then man, as Tech had informed him. He was a shell of a man. Not even half of a man. There was no way you'd love him now. Not when he couldn't give you a normal relationship. Not when he couldn't hold you in his arms with both of them.

It did not go unnoticed by you at how he flinched when you attempted to reach for his other arm. His body just reached. A somber expression overshadowed your face. He was intentionally avoiding meeting your eyes now.

"Echo". Your voice was as gentle as a whisper. It hit his heart with such a blow. Oh how he missed your angel like voice. How he missed you!

"Echo". There it was again. Softer. "Look at me".

He couldn't.

"Please". You were pleading with him now. You just wanted to see him. See his new yet familiar face up close. You missed it so much.

He sighed deeply. "I-I can't".

"Why not?". You wanted to know why.

He was sacred to tell you. Scared that you wouldn't feel the same way about him, especially with the way he looked now. How could anyone as beautiful as you want someone like him?! But he needed to get it off his chest. Let it be there out in the open. Even if it ended with his heart shattered.

"Because it's too hard".

That confused you. "What do you mean?"

He shook his head. "It's too hard to look at you knowing that I can't have you. Knowing that I can't give you everything that you want or deserve". He was starting to tremble. "It's too hard knowing that I'll never be able to wrap both of my arms tight around you. I can't—I can't give you that".

If your heart broke before at hearing his story, it now shattered like glass at hearing him feel so ashamed of himself for how he looked.

You quickly cupped his face between your hands, forcing him to face you. Tears fully sliding down your face as you regarded him.

"I love you Echo".

His eyes widened while his breath hitched deep within. He must have misheard you. There was no way you could have....

"I love you". He had heard it right. "And it breaks my heart to know this is how you think of yourself, Echo. It doesn't matter how you look. I fell in love with you because of who you are on the inside".

He blinked. "Y-you love me..?" He stuttered as he tried to wrap his head around what was happening. You nodded your head.

"So much".

His features turned grim. He shook his head. Knocking himself out of the dream, that he so desperately wanted.

How could someone as perfectly Stunning and breathtaking as you, want someone imperfect and broken like him? You deserved better!

"How can you say that when I look like this?! How can you say that knowing what I am?! I can't give you a normal relationship!". He questioned you with a raised tone, gesturing to his mutilated body held together by wires and mechanical parts.

You hated how he was belittling himself. Hated that he thought so little of himself. Hated that he felt so much shame and guilt. When to you he was your world. He always had been. Your heart ached because of it.

"Echo, your handsome. You always have been. A few cyber enhancements or pale skin isn't going to change how I feel about you. You shouldn't be ashamed by them".

"It should". He muttered under his breath. But in the silence of the parlor you could hear him as if he was speaking in his normal tone.

Needing to knock some sense back into him, you did the only thing you could think of. And boy was it a bolder move then you usually had in you. But you had to get through to him that you saw all of him and wanted everything.

You crashed your mouth down onto his. Your plump lips on his startled him. That was definitely not what he thought you were going to do. The last thing he expected. But he liked it. Oh maker did he like it.

So naturally, he leaned, pushing himself against you. Allowing his hand to cup your cheek and bring you closer to him. You brought your hand up to cover his and then you reached down to touch his cybernetic one. Feeling your human skin brush up against his metal replacement he tensed up and tried to pull away. But you stopped him.

"Are you sure?"

He searched your eyes for any doubt, but he found none. There was no disgust. Not a single hint of it. Nor were you repulsed by them. In fact there were no negative feelings. All that stared back at him was...love. Happiness. And contentment. This is what you really wanted. His breathing turned unsteady.

You really really wanted him.

All of him.

You loved him....

You loved him.

Then there was nothing left to do. Wasting no more time he made his own confession known.

"I love you". Your eyes welled up at those three powerful words you had waited so long to hear. "By the maker I love you so much. I wasted so much time not telling you. Afraid that you wouldn't want to be with a clone". He chuckled lightly, his own tears beginning to build at the corners of his eyes.

"Fives was right though". His thumb swiped away your own tears. You pressed your cheek into his palm, wanting to take in his long awaited touch.

Before, mentioning Fives name would bring up too many heartbreaking feelings. Now it only held wonderful memories.

You smiled so brightly. "About what?"

"That you'd feel the same way about me that I do about you".

It was your time to chuckle while more tears streamed down your face. This time though, they were ones of joy.

“He always did know more then us".

Echo looked longingly into your eyes. Still in awe that you had chosen him, but was elated that you had.

“Yeah. He did".

Your brought his lips back to yours and he had no complaints about it. He leaned into your touch and pulled you into his lap. Wanting to feel your body near his, feel your skin as his hand roamed along your back. It wouldn't be long before his brothers made their way back into the parlor and found the two of you in a compromising position, but neither of you cared.

You tasted so sweet to him, like a nectar filled cocktail and he wouldn't let anything or anyone stop him from consuming you. Maybe not here, in the open. But oh he would have you. He had waited long enough.

Especially when you had chosen him. Made it clear that you wanted to be with him no matter what he looked like. No matter the cyber enhancements. You saw past that. It didn't digest you or make you think twice about being with him.

The emotions you exuded out of him made him feel whole again. You made him feel like a man again. And he would spend ever single waking minute, for how ever long you wanted to be with him, showing you just how much that meant to him.

#star wars #bad batch #star wars the bad batch #the bad batch #i love the bad batch so much #star wars the clone wars #echo bad batch #bad batch echo #the bad batch echo #echo x reader #bad batch fanfic #megabeewrites

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katyspersonal · 1 month

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I mean... Miyazaki doesn't make "good" gods. I doubt Miquella wouldn't be on the Griffith tier of evil that the insane folks speak of, but considering that Malenia is dead, he got violated, and there's a godslayer tarnished running around... unless he plays a similar role to Ranni we're gonna fight him, and those theorists are gonna be ANNOYING

I think the first statement is a bit irrelevant. There are some "good" gods..... when they are true Gods, not 'humans with privileges of Gods'! For example, Kos in Bloodborne was not doing anything bad, she was just vibing with her worshippers in the village! Or Rom, who is protecting humanity from Eldrich Horrors. Or Ebrietas, who is cooperating with humans to help them to ascend! On the other end, we have Gods who are kinda neutral, like the Old One in Demon Souls who doesn't really have mind and simply devours everything, or Greater Will in Elden Ring that relies on mortals to give it the purpose, the "order", whatever it is, and its morality depends on what the person it gave moderator rights will choose! Formless Mother or God of Rot also basically just exist, they are as "good" or "evil" as forces of nature can be!

What I am saying is, Miyazaki doesn't blame everything on "evil gods" and what IS more common is theme of humanity being the true evil 🤔 Usually the "gods" who are corrupt either were corrupted by human evil or are human in all but status!

(Lol Goldmask was something else) Which, yes, in this case, Miquella is not safe from the trend, I just wanted to point this out because Fromsoft games try to make a point that real evil is not the girls (gender neutral) from outer space, deep see or astral realm. The real evil is in our nature!

We do not know what to expect from Miquella, but considering Soulsborne's trademark depression, my bet would be that Miquella was a genuinely good, kind person, but got ruined. This world is an awful place for a good, compassionate soul! His body might be "unalloyed", but his soul is not necessarily so! It is hard to stay kind and strong no matter what, and it is risky to always try to help because sometimes it will be a mistake. For how long you can remain kind before you lose your patience and decide people are not worth it? 'Die hero or live long enough to be the villain'. In my opinion we can expect to find him in fallen, despair state, and either we help to encourage him to get back up or the story asks us a question whether we, or someone else, is willing to take the kind hero's 'mantle' from him, even despite someday surely ending in this sorry state too.

Okay I've gone too chatty, but my point is, Miquella might end up being "evil"; something that was not there from the start, but giving away self-destructively to the kind that doesn't deserve kindness done it. But if, IF he was "evil" from the start for lack of better term.. that'd be on his human side, not on his god side!

#elden ring #miquella the unalloyed #use later #ask replies

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turntechgodsmut · 2 months

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HOW CAN I CONTACT NICK PLEASEEE IM A 13 YR OLD SILLY GIRL WHO IS INFACT MENTALLY ILL IM ACTUALLY PERFECT FOR HIS STANDERDS PLEASEEE I NEED TO TALK TO HIM :3

For your own sake I’m hoping this is a joke

If it’s not, here! I’ll give you the full details on what to expect if you contact him! Because I met him when I was 14 and also a mentally ill silly girl!

Expect to be brutally raped. This is not gentle, you will be bleeding for days. He will slam your head against walls and choke you to the point you are gasping out for precious air, it’s not a sexy kind of choking. It’s the kind where it hurts as you struggle to breathe and suffocate slowly. It’s a near death experience on the regular. Speaking of near death experience! He will threaten you with knives, he held one to my throat. It’s an indescribable feeling, when you feel your stomach sink as you realize your life could end right there at the hands of another human. It makes your body react in ways you can’t control.

You will find yourself sobbing and crying, because he will make you feel insane and delusional for thinking anything is wrong with this relationship. You will beg him so many times to stop hurting you, to stop raping you, he will not stop. He may apologize after, but he will do it again.

If you’re like me you may even attempt suicide while dating him! Don’t expect him to visit you in the psychiatric hospital, he doesn’t care about you that way. But he will use your body again as soon as you’re out.

He is a parasite too. He thrives off of tons of people. Expect him to hurt your friends! He raped my friends too! We all hid our scars we received from him from each other, we were too ashamed despite all of us hurting because of him. You will feel intense guilt for being the reason he even knew them.

There is also the subject of family and loved ones! Years after this you may finally have the courage to tell them what you went through. They will feel shame and anger and guilt for having not seen the signs, for having not helped you. They will look at you for the rest of your life knowing how much you were hurt and they will hate themselves for letting it happen to you. You will always see it behind their eyes, it never goes away.

It never ever goes away. You won’t be able to maintain a normal relationship ever again. You can try, but every time someone touches you, you will struggle to not flinch, to not think they will hurt you too. Sex will never be enjoyable, your mind will always remember the ways you were hurt and violated. The way you gave someone so much trust to be intimate with you, and the way your trust was quickly broken.

And what about the rest of your life? Well! You will be so mentally fucked, you will cry for days on end about how you lost your childhood, lost your innocence to a fucking creep. To some fucking loser. If you’re like me you’ll be too depressed and traumatized to make anything out of yourself! You just become a shit college dropout addicted to drugs that help numb the pain.

Do not make the same mistakes I did. I thought I was so special and mature for having an older guy pay attention to me. Older guys who go after little girls do so because they are losers. No girls their age like them. They know how to utilize their power over you. I get wanting to fall into self destruction, I was the same. But please do not ever subject yourself to people like this. It isn’t worth it.

I only hold onto this url bc I don’t want “stans” of his taking it and glorifying him. He is a monster. Years later I still have nightmares about him. Even recollecting everything to answer this ask had me breaking down, but if I can tell the honest truth, in such a way that no child will ever have to go through what I went through, I will.

Please just do something better with your time. You are young, enjoy it while you are able to. Have fun, be silly, pick up creative hobbies. Live your life for YOURSELF not for some fucking man who will not give a shit about you later.

#sorry to word this so harshly but #I want this to scare you #bc I didn’t know the truth of how awful he was as a kid #and maybe if I had known what he was really like and the long term affects #maybe I would have been too scared to talk to him #ppl told me to stay away but never really told me why #maybe having something more definitive will work better than just a “stay away”

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liketheinferno2 · 9 months

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few disconnected things about xvi:

The big eikon fights are all LONG like bare minimum ten minutes I think I was on titan for thirty. To make this bearable they're in checkpoint phases like xiv raids. I like it. Unfortunately I have a habit of pausing to talk to people and then completely forgetting what I was doing so left Clive in the knife edge of Zantetsuken for 2 hours.

These summons are as classic as you get for like... narrative function. I'm a huge fan of old ff summoners where they're just kind of born this way and the visual on it is the form of this god creature overtaking their entire body. Less classic when most characters only get one eikon but very effective. Jumping out of my seat about some of this stuff I love gamma ray level megaflare. Titan the size of an mountain dwarfing summons as tall as buildings. Odin's SCARY in this one man maybe it's just me... but when the guy on the other end can sever anything he perceives as capable of being severed that's the sort of thing I love to see with reality bending fantasy powers.

I'm about 90% of the way done I think... at this point it is coming back again and again to this thesis of choice and autonomy as essential to human life and worth fighting for, for yourself and others. This story has an interesting presentation where characters can be very groundedly human having literal conversations at some points and theatrical actors posed for effect at others. Not a bad thing, feels very Utena-like to me. The eikon pulling scenes too, I have to compare it to sword pulls? Like this isn't sex but it can be intimate/caring/painful/violating in a very personal way... I'm just counting on my fingers here but you see it used like 1. By accident, painful and stressful for both parties, 2. on purpose, pushing Clive fearfully into a new life like he becomes a Bigger Adult, 3. to assert dominance, bad for everybody, 4. out of caring to gain understanding of another person, 5. out of love and trust willfully given, 6. forced and violent in that weird theatrical way I was talkin about earlier.. looking back on these as a whole I feel gears turning.

Kinda shoujo kinda berserk kinda thing you have to embrace the chuuni to get into. Other thing that keeps crossing my mind is how much this feels like ff's take on a Guts and Casca. OTHER other thing is how much this feels like this team's take on ff7's Avalanche, ff15's mistakes, ff4's drama with ff14's design ethos. REMINDS ME OF A LOT OF THINGS I LOVE BUT IS ALSO DISTINCTLY IT'S OWN THING both in and outside the bounds of the rest of the series. Not really getting the GoT comparison but that was low hanging fruit for lazy critics in the first place lol.

Also really really really good at portraying gentle touches and the sense that these characters feel safe in each other's arms and I love that shit. I'll hold off for now with the pictures but almost my entire photo library for ff16 is characters holding each other or saying some gay shit or both at once. Stopping myself here but there's your thinking out loud gamer post for the week o/

#let him speak #final fantasy sex and violence #post script i like that there's dodge assist OR auto dodge #slow reaction time doesn't mean I don't wanna try with training wheels on :P #i will keep auto DOG on though

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sounknownvoid · 9 months

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sam is afraid of lucifer - but not just for reasons we think

this is another spn random too late at night that occurred to me today: sam is afraid of lucifer - d-uh! : sam has seen lucifers true face, hes tortured him in hell for 180 years, manipulated him his entire life in order to posess him etc,etc.... so yeah d-uh ofc hes scared!.... but theres this horrifying thought thats occurred to me just falling asleep (yeh apparently in that fuzzy place before sleep i head towards spn - ah spn is my true love!)... those might not be the only reasons...

If anyone been in a toxic relationship or abusive situation or coercive situation they might have a better insight - the thing about being in those situations is - you *know* how bad that person is, you *know* how abusive they are, you *know* they're toxic to you and for you and you should not be there...but you know what the most evil,degrading absolute horror of a situation like that is? - being convinced, against your better judgement, your logic to stay - having your own "goodness" turned against you to manipulate you into staying - your compassion and heart and empathy being turned against you into staying - so they can abuse you more, with your seeming "consent" - making you an accomplice in your own murder n rape.... and making you a contemptible, pathetic person in your own eyes cos its making you complicit in your own violations - of your body,mind, heart and spirit... the devil is not evil for what he does to you - its because of what he gets you to do, to yourself, fully aware - the slippery rope, the seduction into it...

Even if you do survive - you will never again trust your own judgement or have faith in yourself or any self-worth or confidence ...let alone heal, help others and have compassion and retain empathy for others...

Now multiply this by a 100, a 1000...coz what i described was a human domestic abuse situation - can you imagine what lucifer could have done to sam?.... no, its not the rapes and the tortures and the hooks and eye-gouging....what samd be afraid of lucifer for the most was how easy itd be for sam to slip back into that mode of being "lucifers b*ch" all while thinking ge deserves it . ... its the "conditioning" of sam that lucifer is capable of/has shown/has done to sam that sam has to fight against every single day....

all leading to even more feelings of self-doubt, worthlessness,insecurity,self-loathing "unclean"-ness.... ie, its what sam becomes when in proximity to lucifer that hed be afraid of most i reckon...

And the thing that gets me absolutely frothing at the mouth about spn-writers, is - sam is repeatedly having to confront and rebuild himself as lucifer is brought back over n over again right in sams face... the absolute exhaustion on having to dig himself out of that headspace all over again - all while terrified that maybe this time, he cant dig himself out, maybe this time he just. Cant. ... leaving sam to think maybe he really didnt make it out of hell after all...

(& yet sammy does have that strength to rebuild himself and even has enough compassion left over to help nick and lucifers kid - my absolute fucken king sammy!)

#sam winchester #supernatural #Lucifer n sam winchester #Sam winchester cage trauma #I hate how they treat my boy sammy 🥺#Someone help articulate this better?#spn brainrot #Bamf sam winchester #Sam winchester abused - batterred wife syndrome #Sam winchester abuse survivor

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z0mbi3-s0krat3s · 1 year

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Often thought as as a race of lurkers, the "Grays" are said to be perverse, alien peeping Toms who spy and spy and spy until their invasion of human privacy isn't enough to satisfy them from afar. It is always only a matter of time before these galactic creeps are said to abduct, violate, and even dissect our friends, family and neighbors, all for the sake of their fiendish curiosity. They are our enemies, as it's told by popular human lore -- an advanced society of dubious science-freaks whose only concern is for that of acquiring information. They are often portrayed as emotionless, psychic, and meticulous in their misadventures between stars -- inhuman villains with little more than an undefined awareness of the pain they inflict on others. But I now better. I know the truth of this wandering predator. The truth is, these creatures -- these tyrants of technology and math -- are far, far worse than the stories that are told. They are not cold and apathetic; they are purposeful and sadistic. It is not knowledge they seek; it is superiority through the inflation of their ravenous egos. These Zeta Reticulans...they are not a people but a gang of interstellar psychopaths who were banned from their own world and cast into the void. There are tens of thousands of them, all prisoners by way of excommunication, condemned to wander amongst the stars in search of the next world they can molest simply to make themselves feel alive. I know this because I know better. I know that no technologically advanced species would set out to purposely cause pain and incite fear. No. We have been very, very wrong about these "Zeta Reticulans"... They are not studying us, and they are not just too advanced to consider us worth their concern. That is a moronic assumption uttered by idiots who know no other logic than that which they've absorbed from 1950s Hollywood. No. These creatures... They know exactly what they are doing. And that's exactly why they are doing it. There is no making piece with criminals whose greatest pleasure is to see you suffer. There is only pain, and angst, and terror. That is, until that day when the tables will turn. That day when our technology is a match for theirs, and we can spot them coming from an AU away. We will pluck them from the space that has become their prison and drag them into the Hell they deserve; a Hell on Earth where their consciousness will be locked into a state of misery, their bodies slowly withering under the ocean in isolation barracks built for their torture. And they are long lived, it is said. Long enough so to be sufficiently punished for the crimes they have committed. Because what other punishment would suit a predator of entire worlds other than eons of unrelenting comeuppance? And that day will come. It will come on a storm of merciless revenge that will turn a heartless predator to the helpless victim.

Vindication by -cm

Explore all 6 unique versions of these twisted beings with a premium download from AnomalousDesigns and thank you for feeding The Construct. -z

#dark art #horror #horror art #scifihorror #scifi #aliens #alien abduction #alien invasion #the grays #zeta reticulan #gray aliens #alien design #creature design #aiart #midjourney art

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masterofrecords · 5 months

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NRC basketball team roster

(As depicted in my fic, Aquarium)

Okay, first of all, I'm really glad I planned for this chapter to take at least 2 weeks from the start, because yesterday I managed to fuck up my knee a little, so my mental energy goes to worrying about it and my physical energy goes towards stretching and working my knee to make sure the bones don't again try to misalign themselves and the joint remains decently pain-free. Definitely didn't need the added stress of "damn, I should be writing", haha.

Anyway, this list has tiny little spoilers, most of which likely won't become apparent until the chapter is published, but I'm warning you just in case.

---

Nima - (unofficial) coach, former center

Savanaclaw, junior. In his last proper year at school he took over the coaching position (because who else is going to do that, Vargas? No thank you). Has a little too much energy and enthusiasm and not enough understanding of the limits of a normal human body. Hopes for Jamil to take over the coach role next year.

3 - Egil - shooting guard

Pomefiore, sophomore. Despite different positions, Gideon's unofficial protege. Everyone is quite unsure if there's something going on between them or if Pomefiore is just Like That. Depending on team composition sometimes plays as a forward, but is not very comfortable in any playmaking role, prefers to defer tactical decisions to others.

5 - Jamil - point guard

Scarabia, sophomore. While versatile about the position he plays in, prefers to stay to the back line to direct his team's play and make long shots from behind the three-pointer line. One of the highest-scoring members of the team.

10 - Floyd - center

Octavinelle, sophomore. Dunk shots are his bread and butter, but he surprisingly enjoys the defense, too - especially when it allows him to bully other players under the basket. In official matches tends to get removed from the court for rule violations way before the end of the game, which annoys him to no end.

11 - Ace - shooting guard

Heartslabyul, freshman. Pretty good at most technical things and able to play a variety of positions, but tends to be impulsive and make rash decisions that lead to mistakes. Has a special talent for provoking the opposing team to foul on him.

13 - Bertram - point guard

Diasomnia, freshman. A bird beastman of generally quiet disposition, though allows himself to express himself more on the court. Tends to be in a (mostly) friendly competition with Ace as a fellow freshman.

17 - Gideon - center/power forward

Pomefiore, junior. The second half of the "rituals are intricate" Pomefiore duo. Tall but lanky, prefers playing forward but often has to sub in for Floyd as center if Floyd breaks the rules too many times.

18 - Mosi - shooting guard

Savanaclaw, junior. In his freshman year he didn't make it into the spelldrive club, and might be still a little bitter about it, but mostly is determined to prove his worth as a basketball player. Has a temper problem on par with Floyd - sometimes they cancel each other out, sometimes the opposite.

22 - Ludwig - small forward

Octavinelle, junior. One of the more versatile players on the team, though he's mainly been playing as forward since his sophomore year when he bulked up. Unlike many others, finds strategy and tactics discussions at practice fascinating.

25 - Ryder - small forward

Scarabia, junior. Compensates for his short stature with almost unnatural speed and jump height. Has been having some problems with discipline and being a team player for the last several months - actually, since winter break. Wonder why that might be.

31 - Jay - power forward

Savanaclaw, sophomore. Accident prone. Didn't train for several months of his freshman year due to a concussion sustained during History class, refuses to elaborate on the details.

#masterofrecords writes #i got tired of this list when i was writing jay sorry #also gotta stretch my knee again so that's it that's all you're getting #not that many people wanted this in the first place lmao #but this team was sure fun to create

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morebedsidebooks · 18 days

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Poison Ivy #19-21

Checking in with the Poison Ivy comic series again, we’ve reached a set of trio issues #19-21 forming “Origin of Species”. This writer G. Willow Wilson’s efforts in marrying together the contributions by many creatives over decades who have taken on the matter of Poison Ivy’s origins. Which if that sounds ambitious, you’d be right.

In media Ivy’s origins have often been recounted either by others or herself. However, because of the developments that led here in previous issues, this secret origin is too for all ones knows a last testament. With that frame dare readers hope for a more sapient, innermost version?

To begin issue #19 sees Pamela Isley off to a Seattle university as an undergraduate in a plant biochemistry program fatefully headed by Dr. Jason Woodrue. Wanting to best her peers (leading botanists Alec and Linda Holland plus Philip Sylvain), entranced both by the work and Woodrue, falling for a sexual relationship with him among other manipulations. When the next round of funding for the experiments runs out, Pam makes her first foray into crime.

Next for issue #20, as things with Pam and Woodrue continue to escalate, Wilson once more does not forget a relatively recent character in the schemes of things… Bella Garten.

Her last appearance to this in a flashback in #2, it’s been several issues. So, let’s take a minute to discuss Bella.

As a fellow student and love interest, specializing in botany and genetics going on to earn a doctorate, Bella Garten or the The Gardener as she would become first appeared in Batman #107 in 2021 creation of writer James Tynion IV. Plus, part of the thread of story involving Poison Ivy during the Fear State event and into the past. The one-shot Batman Secret Files: The Gardener (written by Tynion and art by Christian Ward) was also included in the first collected edition of Poison Ivy. However, the file, another secret origin comic is less about Bella Garten and more an attempt to appeal to Batman to help Ivy (around the Tom King Everyone Loves Ivy period) running through decades of Ivy’s character (with adjustments). Part of the history there exposed, particularly certain actions of Gardener, is uncomfortably weird.

Yet again an example of major violation done to Ivy by someone she trusted. The revelation resulting in a short confrontation between the two in Fear State Omega. (The issue also marking the end of Tynion’s Batman run with Art: Riccardo Federici, Christian Duce, Ryan Benjamin, Guillem March & Trevor Hairsine, Colorist: Chris Sotomayor and Letterer: Clayton Cowles). Where Ivy is having none of the presented defense.

In sum a character that functions more as a plot point, another retcon while trying to put it all (back) together. Yet, coherency that has been needed. Despite the American superhero genre (in)famously being one where seemingly everything and nothing is canon, something still important. So too, the first ongoing series for Poison Ivy not just ought to but, does endeavor to plumb over 50 years of a character’s existence. While bringing what each creative uniquely can. It’s worth asking then if Bella is made more too under Willow’s writing.

Wrapping up casting Ivy’s mind back, issue #21 arrives at the full Poison Ivy. Once again, becoming a human experiment (volunteering!) and transformation. An old life lost, the new leading to Gotham— yet for a unique green reason.

As a woman with growing abilities, confidence in using them, the law is just an obstacle to justice. But of course, conflict and differences plus mistrust with Batman result with Ivy in and out of the terrible Arkham Asylum. This would be the early pre-Harley days too, even though the Ivy costume calls back to the influential BTAS.

Then what can I say about the art I’ve haven’t already in other reviews. Jessica Fong continues to deliver pretty and pretty gross (body) horror main covers. (On the latter it took a while to prepare myself to read the previous issue #18. Though it’s not shocking that bodily autonomy, something Ivy’s origins raise too, makes the list of also current matters the series depicts.)

Marcio Takara definitely has set a bar as the main artist for the series. I wish he was drawing every issue. Though nothing against the other artists who have so far done so. It’s just that I generally wish for a creative team to be able to remain consistent through a run. I’ve praised colorist Arif Prianto consistently too. On the other hand, since these installments are Ivy believing she’s dying and mired in her distant past, I’m surprised there isn’t more of a difference exhibited of that. Why not really experiment with the paneling, designs, and color palette. Just as key the letterer Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou can switch things up to good effect. Actually, if part of the team working on Poison Ivy had to change briefly maybe here was where to do that instead.

In the end these issues of the comic series offer an origin stressing the choices and chances. A Poison Ivy that refutes being pathologized, focuses less on victimization, and more of her own creation and missteps along the way. It’s interesting too, if not still poignant, to look back to the first few issues of Poison Ivy. In soon coming up on two years, the series has issue by issue after issue grown and been recognized as an Outstanding Comic Book by GLAAD. After reflecting on a new(ish) past it continues forward.

#poison ivy #dc comics #G Willow Wilson #Marcio Takara #Arif Prianto #Hassan Otsmane-Elhaou #Jessica Fong #long post #cw: toxic relationship verbal abuse medical experimentation forced institutionalization

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whumpshaped · 9 months

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lore: feeding

lore on demons and feeding. thank u to @whumpsday for asking all those leading questions

demons will survive without anything – they're immortal until killed. but to not go hungry/starve, they need to feed on others' emotions. aside from that they can and usually do feed on raw meat, which is a very good belly-filler, or they can even engage in some human food if they want for recreational purposes. but again, to actually avoid starving, they need emotions.

demons feed on (almost always) negative emotions, of which the most common ones are: fear (most demons are very good at feeding on this), disgust, anger, and shame. rarer ones include loneliness, anxiety, jealousy/envy, disappointment, boredom, things like that. the only one that can be considered positive and many demons can feed on it is sexual pleasure.

most demons are naturally good at feeding on one or two of those. being "good" at feeding on an emotion means it's instinctual, passive even. the demons can't even help it, and why would they want to? it's like a human going out in the sun and absorbing vitamin d. you can't just stop on command. being "bad" at feeding on an emotion means that it's mental work. it's like hunting for food: a predator must evaluate whether the prey is worth running after. for demons, trying to feed on something they're not naturally good at is like running half a marathon for a bowl of porridge. sure, it's food, but it took more energy to get it than what it'll actually replenish.

demons can work on getting better at feeding on certain emotions, but it's usually unnecessary. most of these feelings are equally easy to invoke in others, there's no need for a fear-inclined demon to try and get into feeding on shame. plus while they can get somewhat better, it's never a huge improvement, and it's a slow process.

between demons, humans, and angels, it's not easier or harder to feed on any one species. of course it's harder to catch humans and angels, but once they're securely within the demon's grasp, they're equally easy to feed on. the flavour however does vary! there's an ongoing demon debate on whether demons and humans even taste any different (both emotion and meat-wise), but like 99% agree that angels are tastiest inside and out. i'd say 65% says humans taste better, the remaining 35% says it's likely just the thrill of the hunt that makes the others say that.

"starving" isn't that big of a deal as in humans and works differently. starved demons get extremely restless instead of lethargic and tired. it's their bodies' mechanism for urging them to go hunt for something. their bodies don't change based on the amount they do or don't consume, they kind of stay the same all the time unless they possess the rare but very cool gift of shapeshifting.

demons can consume any amount of food, either emotional or physical. if they eat past the point of comfortable satiety, it doesn't really affect anything. most powerful demons spend their whole life well-fed, full and happy, rarely ever even experiencing any hunger. some swear by waiting a bunch between meals though, so the hunger sets in and sets off that adrenaline. they think hunting is better that way.

all creatures can feel when they're being fed on (emotionally). it's not readily apparent, but once they recognise that violating feeling once, they can confidently tell when it happens again. it's sort of like the tingle on the back of your neck when you feel like you're being stared at. it's not very pleasant (despite that, some demons love it lol there's a kink for everything)

as for some facts about my specific set of blorbos:

the devil can feed on absolutely anything. their special favourites are fear and disgust, but they're an omnivore.

astaroth is naturally inclined towards pleasure and shame, with fear as a close second (third i guess but those first two are pretty tied).

shax is naturally inclined towards fear and anxiety, and he HATES it. he wishes it was absolutely anything else. anxiety is one of the harder emotions to inspire in someone, and scaring another demon as a low-ranking silly goose is just so fucking hard. he also gets basically zero satiety from pleasure which sucks because maybe he could've been goodnat that. he usually depends on astaroth for food.

taglist: @the-scrapegoat @heavenly-whumper @whumpsday @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night

#got under your skin

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sassygwaine · 1 year

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parts of “unmasking autism” by devon price, phd that made me go oof

I do think when allistic people declare that everyone is a little Autistic, it means they are close to making an important breakthrough about how mental disorders are defined: why do we declare some people broken, and others perfectly normal, when they exhibit the same traits? Where do we draw the line, and why do we even bother doing so? (32)

All too often, the difference between who gets perceived as an innocent, shy Autistic and who gets viewed as creepy, awkward, and obviously disabled is more a function of things like race, gender, and body size than it is any innate difference in personality or behavior. (57)

I was basically a perpetual adolescent, performing intelligence for praise but mismanaging my personal life and not connecting with anyone in a deeper way. (85)

Once you’ve proven yourself capable of suffering in silence, neurotypical people tend to expect you’ll be able to do it forever, no matter the cost. (99)

When the entire world shames people for being into “childish” things, having odd mannerisms, or simply being irritating, you don’t need ABA to program you into compliance. Everyone around you is already doing it. (102)

Unfortunately, when an Autistic person complains about the sensory pain they’re in, people think they’re being overly dramatic, needy, or even downright “crazy.” … They acted as if I chose to be distracted and furious every day. (115)

We often seek out clear “rules” for good behavior, which we then adhere to rigidly, hoping they will keep us socially safe and finally render us worthy. (121)

When many of us were growing up, adults saw us as loud, stubborn, uncaring, overly reactive, and burdensome. We’ve grown up believing we truly are hard to be around, and to love. (144)

Today, his fiction readers tell him he’s fantastic at writing dialogue, and really understands how other people speak and feel. But it’s not because these things come naturally to him. He devoted thousands of hours to picking conversations apart to make sense of them. (161)

We’re more like the protagonist of the video game Katamari Damacy, a freaky, colorful demigod who rolls an ever-growing ball of objects around, each step forward attracting more random items into his ball’s expanding gravitational field until it engulfs the universe. We don’t complete discrete projects. We build worlds. (178)

It’s vital we learn to navigate interactions marked by conflict, and practice standing firm in the face of negative reactions from others. As long as we haven’t abused anyone or violated their rights, it’s okay for our actions to make others unhappy. (193)

At times, unmasking means teaching our neurotypical friends and family to treat us better; in other situations, it may mean disengaging from those who aren’t ever going to be worth the effort. (195)

[regarding friendships worth cultivating:] Who tells me honestly when I’ve hurt them, and gives me a real opportunity to do better? (205)

“I am not a math-minded type of Autistic…I am the kind who thinks about people obsessively.” (219)

In his writing, [Mike] Oliver described disability as a political status, one that is created by the systems that surround us, not our minds and bodies. (230)

Emotions that are too large, passions that are too childish and not profitable, habits that are too repetitive, and bodies and minds that require daily assistance all challenge this incredibly narrow definition of health. It is only by expanding our definition of what is acceptable human behavior and working to meet other people’s manifold needs that we can move forward. (233)

From the Tuskegee Syphilis Study, to Hans Asperger’s research on “high-functioning” Autistics, to the forced lobotomies performed on gay people and communists, immense violence has been done in the name of science and “protecting” the public. (247)

We all deserve to take a step back and ask whether our lives line up with our values, whether the work we do and the face we show to others reflects our genuine self, and if not, what we might want to change. (250)

#unmasking autism #just finished currently processing

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stillarandom-radfem · 11 months

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You know, gendies and radfems can argue back and forth all day about whether gender dysphoria is a "real" mental disorder or not, but one thing that I refuse to argue is the utterly ridiculous notion that having it can somehow change your biological sex on it's own. A self-loathing man is still a man, and a self-loathing woman is still a woman; your personal sense of self-worth has zero impact on your DNA. The purpose of language is to enhance communication, and those words developed to describe people with specific reproductive typicalities. They didn't develop to make people feel good, because feeling good is not the purpose of language (that's what chocolate is for, jk, lol). Without a solid definition to words, the entire purpose of language dissolves, and no one will be able to understand one another. Think of the biblical "tower of Babel" story, but happening in real time, NOT mythical, and, obviously, induced by human stupidity instead of some presumably made-up, patriarchal angry god. Besides, biological women will still go on existing without a word to describe ourselves, regardless of whether men (trans-identified or otherwise) like it or not. We just won't be able to organize politically, since the law requires clear and concise language in order to work. And I'm pretty sure that barring half the human race from the right to political organization and redress violates several international human rights laws. But then, I guess it shouldn't surprise us that TiMs don't want us to have the same basic human rights that they do, because they really don't make any bones about their misogynistic hatred of women. Want to prove otherwise, TiMs? Stop claiming that having gender dysphoria makes you a woman. It makes you a man with gender dysphoria, full stop.

Also, it goes against the laws of science to claim that feelings change your sex, and also should probably be noted that it doesn't seem to apply to any other mental health disorders. Anorexics, Bullimics, and Orthorexics all think themselves fat; that doesn't mean they are. People with Cotard's Syndrome may believe that parts of their bodies are missing, or that they're dying, dead, or don't exist; that doesn't mean that any of that is true. Schizophrenics can suffer auditory and sometimes visual hallucinations and experience delusions of grandeur and and acute paranoia. I once met a mostly recovered schizophrenic guy who told me about an episode he once had at a family picnic in the park wherein he hallucinated that he saw aliens land from outer space in a flying saucer, and no one else could see them. News flash: aliens didn't land; they were all in his mind. I am quite short (five feet tall exactly, to be precise). If I managed to delude myself that I was really eight feet tall and told everyone else that I was such, that would not magically make me eight feet tall, nor would it change the fact that I am the shortest person in my immediate family. Hell, I can't even add mere inches to my height simply by claiming a different one, let alone feet. And being short can really suck. Not being able to reach stuff, being frequently condescended to, predatory men choosing me precisely because they want someone weak and vulnerable. I don't like it. But, hey, it's genetics. There is nothing I can do about it. No matter how much I may wish I was 5'6", I'm not. And if wishing I was taller won't actually make me taller, why would wishing you weren't your sex make you the opposite one?

The point is, although wishy-washy New Agers and intellectually dishonest postmodernists alike may violently disagree with me, the truth is that feelings don't change facts and our thoughts really don't do anything to shape our physical and biological realities. The words we use to describe our biology, our political categories, and everything else around us are based on physical realities that absolutely anyone can physically observe in the real world. Turning the world upside down and calling things perpetually the opposite of what they are will not actually change what they are IRL, and you at least secretly know that. If you find yourself unable to cope, that is, shockingly, not the rest of society's problem. You need to learn how to deal with that yourself.

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