#as much as i love my sat evening post propaganda it was. A Lot. to read thru.

[sanctamater]

well i have finished my drafts and also made a carrd because a new era has launched i guess let's go. :)

[estrophore]

Signalis Post (barely coherent thought vomit)

So I finished signalis on Monday and i think ive just about recovered enough for me to make a gush post about it on tumblr dot com, which i think i have to do cause i dont think any other game has really hit me as hard as this one. Spoilers obvs.

Being pre-transion, with that associated depression and closing off from oneself, ive always found it difficult to get out my feelings, even in private with just myself, and yet signalis has filled me throughout with its beautiful romantic melancholy and left me genuinely sobbing for the gay robot and her space girlfriend (almost worried that if id played this game on estrogen it might actually have just killed me on the spot). the only other times i can think of where i really cried were playing We Know The Devil near the beginning of the year, which really fkin hit the part of me that struggles to accept myself, and that time i rewatched the last episode of she-ra after reading the ‘Word War Etheria’ fanfic, which brings the characters so much more to life i fell for them all over again.

Signalis is a game that calls back to a lot of classic horror like resident evil and silent hill, which i havent got round to playing any of yet, but i think nostalgia works both ways sometimes and i’ll be playing them sooner now. sometimes horror gets stereotyped as all death and violence, some games fill themselves with skulls and corpses, and big ugly monsters and basically shout ‘DEATH!’ in your face repeatedly and it all just comes off as a bit garish and ridiculous and not actually very scary really. Signalis sits at the other end of that scale (with some of my other fav horror games like soma, cry of fear) where its environs are most usually just… quiet. Still. Muffled. Sad. just as often as theres tension or creeping fear because of this i find theres a strange kind of comfort too. Maybe its just that in most other genres of games theres so much of music, UI elements, pickups and interactibles with vibrant design. Here, theres room for your mind to just occupy the space. A soft fog. A dimly lit room. An empty train. Snow out a window. Liminal spaces that dont expect anything from you.

Signalis is a game thats just simply, unapologetically gay, and i dont think i would have been quite so invested in Elster and Ariane’s relationship if they were a straight couple. Its why representation is important, if art’s way for us to explore our emotions then its important to have media that we can relate to. Even Adler’s role isnt typically masculine. Our replika characters are manufactured, designed for certain roles in the base. Notes from the tough Stars and Storchs in the shooting range, the dollish Eules with the fairy lights and music player in the dorm. I couldnt help but think of groups of Eules sat around chatting, together, and im yearning for that feeling of togetherness, of understanding a friend that closely. I somehow missed the couple in the mineshaft (next playthough, ill find you v_v ). Despite the harshness of life in the Eusan nation (especially for the gestalts) the characters in it are defined by their feelings of belonging and hope. With the obvious parallels to east germany, i think of posters of cosmonauts and space travel from the time. Propaganda, sure but also made with the genuine belief in something greater. When the events of the game take this away, well, we find the last Kolibri, whod rather lose herself than lose her [ah. Im not sure theres a word here to properly describe the relationship they embody]. Its a game defined by loneliness.

We dont lie up at night scared by some corrupted android. We arent stuck with horror at the flesh everywhere, not on its own. We lie awake thinking about Elster and Ariane’s love for each other, the horror of their decline, the futility of trying to hold on forever. Its existential horror done perfectly. It shows an ending postponed and stretched far beyond its limits, and so squarely reminds you that you do, in fact, have to die one day. You’ll break down. One day you’ll say your last words to the people you love and you wont even know you have. Ariane’s final few diaries arrive with the full force of the narrative behind it, like a spear through my heart. For the record, I got the promise ending. Im still sad. It's a game about raging desperately against an unfair ending. I might think about this game for the rest of my life. I would sincerely say its an artistic masterpiece, by the sure definition of video games as art.

I like that the story leaves a lot open and abstract. I think it makes the emotional themes takes centre stage more. And i havent had nearly enough time to sift through it and come up with my own takes, we’ll need a few more playthroughs for that. And theres so much more to say that cant go in just these few paragraphs! Signalis is a game about two girls who had to run away from everything to find someone they belonged with. The universe may be cold and bleak, but you have to try, you might just find something beautiful, even if it doesnt last forever. I think if anything, we should all have the chance to find love and happiness like that, and we shouldnt have abandon a world that doesnt work for us to do it.

[veil-touched-rights-org]

This is Part 1 of a series of posts about moments in the Night Shift Podcast that made me pause/things that I look back on and have thoughts about (or just thoughts). I’m not planning on doing any kind of deep analysis here (though I’m sure I eventually will be doing that as well), as much as just highlighting some moments that for whatever reason stood out. This will be long, as its the entirety of the first episode. 

I also want to be clear that there are spoilers throughout - I’ve also tagged as such. The general tag for this series will be "the veil opens", so watch for that!

All transcript portions pulled from the Night Shift web site (https://www.nightshiftpod.com/)

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads “[Audio cuts]”. End ID.]

Take this in, savor it, it will be a rare occurrence, as Seb has a lot of trouble turning off recorders, as you will later see. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “My goal here, really, isn’t to prove anything. It’s just to talk about it.” End ID.]

Seb, baby, my dear, sweet man, stop lying to yourself. 

All jokes aside, I have no doubts that Sebastian actually started with this mentality, at least sort of. Like wanting to talk about it with sources that weren’t exclusively bought out by Augur or state-owned, and as he did so his natural want to know and understand strengthened this into a more investigative thing. Then his goal wasn’t to prove anything specific as much as that something generally was wrong. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “If you’re from Echor, you’ll also know a thing or two about ALPHAs. If you’re not, you’ve probably heard of them on the news or something. Augmented humanity, manufactured by the most progressive - and impressive - scientific minds in the United States.” End ID.]

It’s actually wild that this was the least shady thing going on here. Like, the super soldier genetic engineering program was fine, in the face of everything else. I remember hearing this and being like “that must be a controversial program” and it just wasn’t. Thinking it was weird was the controversial opinion and a rare one. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Of course they’d say that. Augur are responsible for creating these genetically engineered freaks.” End ID.]

Sebastian, I have some news for you, about your genes.

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “North: Well, I think it’ll be good for you anyway. Something to channel all that energy into. Even if Feldman’s a creep. Sorry - is he going to listen to this? Actually, I don’t care. He’s a creep and he should know it. So, how many shots of espresso do you think I can drink before I see God?” End ID.]

I don’t actually have anything to say other than that I love them. Adair North is a treasure who is doing their best, even if they’ve bought the corporate propaganda. In their defense, it seems that not doing so is an even bigger rarity in Echor than in our world. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Sebastian: I don’t really like the idea of being experimented on for science. End ID.]

This, my friends, is what we call foreshadowing (or just an unfortunate coincidence). 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Sebastian: It’s Friday night, about 1am. The shop is empty as usual. Who wants coffee on a Friday after midnight? Still it pays the bills.” End ID]. 

Me. I want coffee on a Friday after midnight.

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “preternatural”. End ID.] 

This sounds like a joke but I did actually pause this here because I LOVE the word preternatural. Like, I sat for a minute happy that this word was here. I’m not sure why I like this word so much, but hearing it so early on probably helped with how much this podcast dug its way into my heart. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: I understand what you’re asking here - the answer is yes. It would be possible. Theoretically, it would be easy. I’m sure you’ve heard stories of the incredible feats people can pull off in life or death situations, right? How people can survive climbing down mountains with broken legs or wrestle a polar bear to save their children? It’s called Hysterical Strength, and it happens in extreme situations when there’s just the right cocktail of cortisol, adrenaline, and endorphins. Humans only use a fraction of our maximum theoretical strength and our bodies naturally conserve energy, not waste it. In most cases, pain and fatigue keep us from reaching our max potential to prevent injury, but when those aren’t a factor, anyone could - again theoretically - run at intense speed or lift an unnatural amount of weight. It’s entirely possible that a drug could be developed that would replicate the physical conditions to set off” End ID]. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: Hysterical Strength. Although, it's never been replicated in a lab on public record, so it still seems unlikely. End ID.]

So, I’m mostly highlighting this to talk about how much I love the way Night Shift grounded itself in reality. (Briefly I also want to praise it for both clearly branding itself as fictional, and making itself obviously fictional as things move on. There have definitely been some podcasts in this style that I had to stop listening to because it messed with my head, and I think this made it much more accessible than it would otherwise be.) Hysterical strength is a very real thing, it really exists in our very real world! And while the specifics of genetics don’t match, the idea of things in our environment altering us in ways we don’t get, and genes being unexplainable also pulls from science in a grounded way. (I personally, have a genetic mutation that is not super understood that does things to me that aren’t entirely understood - unfortunately none of that include preternatural abilities.) 

It does a lot to make this show more understandable, as it means that there is more of a base for what’s new, and not explained by the podcast (as it's assumed to be understood by the in-world listeners.) It makes urban fantasy work so so so well! 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “augmentation programs, and I’m inclined to believe it. It’s been more than two centuries since widespread magic died out. What remains is little more than the echoes of hereditary powers, and that’s limited to a fraction of our population. End ID.]

When I tell you I gasped. Firstly, this is new for the Urban Fantasy I’ve encountered. The idea that the magic of this world is largely inconsequential now? Again, a moment that got me hooked - how would they compensate for that (amazingly as it turns out). Around here is also when I decided that when I was recommending it to people, I was going to call it “Urban Fantasy with a Sci-Fi flair”. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Sebastian: This was an interview with Volta earlier this year after CEO Wesley Hastings announced the ‘Alpha Prime’ initiative. This initiative intends to see an ALPHA Prime, aka an ALPHA with superior powers like…generating fire and camouflaging into their environment, placed in law enforcement in every capital city in the United States in the next ten years. As usual, Volta was the poster boy for the project.” End ID]

The impersonal nature and derision of how he approaches Angelo is almost startling after finishing the first season to be honest - but all relationships start somewhere, and the way their relationship grows is great. More importantly than my character/relationship/ship musings is the terror that I have with the idea of every police force having a super soldier who can set me on fire. It effectively set me up to distrust Augur, even more than everything else// 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Sebastian: Never underestimate my ability to stick to a useless task. That is my superpower. End ID.]

Sure it is, buddy. The only one too, I’m sure. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “North: My opinion on ALPHA is… that they’re hot. If you’re an ALPHA you’re hot. It’s like a given, you know?” End ID.]

Look, they're right, right? Like, I’m an asexual lesbian so it's probably a different kind of hot for me than most, but like, they have to be right, at least for the most part. I think that if I saw Lea Parish in real life there’d be a minute where that was on my brain almost exclusively..

(I will say that I think I’d have more thoughts on ALPHA than that, because like, the idea of them is fishy at the very best, but it’d almost definitely be on my mind somewhere. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “What’s not to love anyway? Augur is the future. One day I’ll be living in my smart home, with my smartwatch and my A.I. assistant taking care of everything so I can live a carefree lids in the lap of luxury, and you’ll be grumpy and alone in your tinfoil hat scrounging for dinner in a dumpster. You’ll see.” End ID.] 

There is so much not to love about this. Dystopian image of a future, to me. I get why some stuff gets smart/automated (disability reasons mostly), but my whole home absolutely will not be.

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “In a simple sense, I don’t agree with any private entity holding as much power as Augur does. Yes - they are the very heart of technological progress, and I don’t begrudge progress by any means - but they also have a chokehold on energy, healthcare, housing… Even balancing their grip on ths country with charity work and initiatives to help people in need, it wouldn’t be a stretch to imagine they’re holding puppet strings in the government.” End ID.]

Seb is so real for this one, actually. I love his anti-corporate sentiments almost as much as I love everything else about him. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “[Sound: Footsteps walking away, stopping] North: Oh Seb? No, he’s really busy right now.] End ID.] 

People looking specifically for Sebastian are such great moments!! Especially because at this point it's not because of the podcast, you know? Like whoever this is just wanted to see or talk to him just to do so. The guy is so so good at endearing himself to people and it makes me sad that he doesn’t know that. 

[Image ID: A portion of a Night Shift: An Urban Fantasy Audio Drama transcript that reads: “Sebastian: I’ve been investigating some rumors about your ALPHA program? And about a street drug called Hunter that supposedly gives users temporary abilities like ALPHAs have? I found some leads, but it gave me more questions than answers, and I thought for clarity I could speak to… [Silence] You know what, never mind. Sorry to bother you. Angelo: Mr. Fen. Sebastian: Huh? Angelo: Take a seat.” End ID]. 

This will probably get its own post at some point because I have what those in the industry call thoughts about this. Like, okay, firstly the establishment of Seb as someone with all the audacity on this planet, who will go up to someone who is on their break and just ask to interview them is great. Then, Angelo just being willing to talk to this amateur reporter on said break, especially with what we know, also great. 

There are ideas about parallels floating vaguely in my brain that I’m excited to delve into. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And that is all for this post!! I hope that you enjoyed this long post and dive into this episode, and that you stick around for the next one!! Enjoy your coffee, get some sleep, and remember that the veil touched are just people. 

[tuungaq]

(i’m making this vent post unrebloggable for obvious reasons and this is long so bear with me. to talk about an experience this week re: jewish families and the uphill battle of unlearning Zionism, i have to start with context.)

in elementary and middle school, i went to reform Hebrew school at my temple twice a week after school, plus Sundays. looking back, way more time was devoted to judaica at the expense of learning vital prayers like the mourners’ kaddish.

within that “judaica” category, i overwhelmingly learned a “history” of israel that left a LOT of key information out. At the expense of the truth of what Israel did and does to the Palestinians. At the expense of learning about the history of how it treats and treated Mizrahi Jews, Sephardic Jews, Russian Jews, Ethiopian Jews, etc. and very little time was spent on American Jewry or learning about the diaspora - some, but certainly less time.

I’m ashamed to say that up until about five years ago, I not only didn’t know what the Nakba was - I believed it was a disinformation campaign. what i had been taught at Hebrew school was strong enough in my mind that it led me to abandon the curiosity that typically guides me through life.

in 2019-2021, I had some wonderful friends who shared articles with me and sat with me as I wrestled with a history I had never been taught. Questions about the Nakba. About what the Israeli militants did to create a jewish-majority state. About Jerusalem. About the right of return. About the wall. Questions that put my own leftist politics to the test. It took years for me to start to move away from Zionism, and I’m still very much learning.

so cut to 2024. last week, in the car on the way to a family Seder. It’s just me and my mom. we’re having a conversation about the campus wide protests. I tell my mom I don’t inherently believe antizionism is antisemitism and she rolls her eyes (there is a language/definition gap I will post about another time that contributes to this). I then go on to say to her this truth: that until 5 years ago I didn’t believe the nakba was real.

My mother’s response: “I don’t know what the Nakba is, and I don’t think I want to know.”

and I am trying, desperately, to be patient. patient in the way my friends were with me. I am trying to remember it took me years to question the propaganda I was taught. and yet what is going on in Gaza is so unconscionable and so I can feel myself losing my mind and my patience with her. she can’t see it because the blinders are SO thick.

so to those having these hard conversations with their jewish, raised-as-Zionist families - I see you and I love you and we will carry on with these conversations because we must, even if it’s poking holes in their POV in the smallest of ways. “We are not obligated to complete the work; nor are we free to abandon it.”

(i am by no means claiming my life is hard or i am experiencing material consequences. i just needed to vent. If you got this far thanks for reading.)

[gumnut-logic]

Dear Mr Tracy (Part 5, Bit 1)

Sweetapple | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 - Bit 1, Bit 2, Bit 3 | Part 5 - Bit 1

@flyboytracy​​​​​​, @amistrio​​​​​​ and @onereyofstarlight​​​​​​​  you asked for it, so you get to suffer more :D Apparently for a long time, cos this is taking me a long time :D

Many thanks to @onereyofstarlight​ @greywake​ and @gaviiadastra​ plus anyone else I attacked with this story recently. I’ve been having fights with my muse. RL keeps messing with it. But today I finally got some words down enough to post :D

I hope you enjoy it :D

-o-o-o-

O’Malley’s was in Whitianga. About five hundred kilometres north-west of the Māhia testing facility. Obviously, the Tracy family jumped distances at a whim and the handful of moments it took the great Thunderbird to reach their destination only highlighted why.

As for Whitianga itself, Alex had been there before. Well, not to O’Malley’s but through the small town. It was a beach holiday destination and on one of Alex’s many excursions around the North Island, he had stopped there for lunch at least once.

This meal was not even on the same scale.

Thunderbird Two landed on the outskirts on what seemed to be an empty paddock, but since the giant craft was then lowered into an underground hangar and hidden away, the paddock proved to be much more than a farmer’s field.

Alex thought many thoughts, but said nothing.

Gordon seemed to have adopted him for the evening and rattled on about keeping the Thunderbirds secure and Scott loved O’Malley’s so much the local council had complained each time he dumped One on the beach…or in other places - Shut up, Gordon!

In any case, since O’Malley’s was their go to for celebration and commiseration, they had purchased a chunk of land out back to stash their ‘birds.

Alex was left wondering how the rest of the world hadn’t clued onto this yet.

Both Gordon and Virgil disappeared for a moment or two before returning dressed in casual pants and shirts.

Alex was reminded of the PA who had given him coffee on that fateful day. As if he could read his mind, Virgil stepped up to him and smiled, lighting up those tired eyes. “Congratulations, Alex.” It was said with far more warmth than earlier and it settled an unrealised knot in Alex’s shoulders.

“Thank you, Virgil.”

That smile curled just a little bit more.

Something warmed deep in Alex’s belly and he flushed.

“C’mon, guys, I’m hungry.” Alan was edging towards what was obviously the exit.

He didn’t have to say it twice as the family moved as one towards the doors. Tia and Alex shared a glance and followed.

-o-o-o-

O’Malley’s was an old Irish pub. Or at least it had been at some point. Somewhere through the years, it had added a little more grill to the menu than was traditional, plus pizza.

Alan spent a whole five minutes extolling their pizza’s virtues while the elder Tracys spoke with management.

Once their party had been moved to a private room at the back of the restaurant, not without a few eyes staring at them, Alex was pretty sure Alan would have pizza.

He ordered a burger.

Which left Alex wondering whether all that pizza talk was just propaganda.

The Tracys appeared to know the owners and there were smiles and appreciation all around. The head cook even came in and gave Mr Tracy the hard eye. Sharp words asked what he had done with his Thunderbird this time. She still hadn’t forgiven him for what he did to her azaleas.

The moment Virgil put up his hand and claimed he had been the driver, the cook let out a sigh of relief and only glared at Scott one more time.

Mr Jeff Tracy sat in one corner, apparently caught between amusement and horror.

Gordon had ushered Alex to a spot between himself and Virgil on the large round table. Virgil glanced up, smiled, and then frowned at Gordon.

Again, Alex had the impression something was being said without words that he could not decipher.

Maybe the Tracys were secretly telepaths.

It would explain a hell of a lot.

Drinks were ordered and Alex retreated to the mainstay of lemon lime and bitters. He wasn’t a huge fan of alcohol as it slowed his brain down and that was not a good thing.

Coffee did the opposite, so it was an obvious choice in most instances.

Most of the Tracys ordered some form of either springwater or sparkling water, except for Alan who got himself a fizzy and Gordon who ordered two separate soft drinks then combined them into what he called a ‘squid-tingler’.

The fact the whole exercise was ignored by the rest of the family was proof enough that this wasn’t unusual.

“So, Alex, what part of this beautiful planet do you hail from?” Gordon grinned at him and slurped his drink.

“Uh, Aotearoa.”

“Which bit?”

“Napier.”

“You’re not from Auckland?”

“Uh, no.”

“Parents, siblings?”

“Yes.”

Gordon eyed him. “Kayo, the subject is being reluctant.”

Kayo didn’t answer, too busy eyeing the menu.

“Gordon, leave him alone.” Virgil didn’t bother to look up from the menu either.

“I’m just starting conversation.”

Alex arched an eyebrow and deadpanned. “‘Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition.’”

That earned him every eye in the room.

“What?” Had he put his foot in it?

Gordon’s face broke into an even bigger grin. “Perfect.”

Alex blushed, he couldn’t help it.

But Virgil was frowning at him. “Alex, how much sun did you get today?”

Oh, great, his hero thought he had gone crazy. “Uh, a bit.”

“Virg, don’t get out the pen light.” Gordon groaned.

“He’s not wearing his uniform, G-“ Alan’s eyes widened. “Never mind.”

Because yes, Virgil had a pen light in his hand. “Hold still.”

“What?”

Mr Tracy was frowning as well. “Do as he says, Alex.”

Okay, Mr Tracy say, Alex do. He held still.

But Virgil didn’t flash it in his eyes, Alex just had the experience of Virgil Tracy frowning, staring at his cheek and muttering about the lack of light in the room.

The light flashed away. “How are you feeling?”

Alex shrugged. “Fine.” Except for his heartbeat which was nearing critical levels. Virgil’s aftershave wafted across his nose and he considered dying on the spot.

Yet again.

“You have some sunburn.”

Oh god.

The immediate image of a red-faced self on a previous idiot expedition came to mind.

“I have some analgesic cream on Two.” Virgil Tracy moved to stand up.

“Oh, god, no, sit down.” Alex suddenly realised he had his hand on Virgil’s arm. He let go of the man. “I’m fine. Can’t even feel it yet. Sit down. Eat dinner.”

Then he realised he was telling a Tracy what to do.

Screw it. “I’m okay, Virgil. Please, we’re here to celebrate.”

Virgil was staring at him, mid-launch-to-the-rescue. His eyes darted over to Mr Tracy and yet again, something was said without words.

Damnit, bloody telepaths.

But Virgil sat back down. “You tell me if you feel unwell.” He might as well have had an admonishing finger waving at Alex.

“I will. I’m fine. Nothing to worry about.” Except that Alex was likely the perfect model for a redhead matches advertisement. At the first chance he was sneaking away to the bathroom to check out the damage.

But in the meantime…dinner.

With the Tracy family.

Whose patriarch was staring at him from across the table, grey eyes assessing.

Yeah.

This was definitely the Spanish Inquisition.

-o-o-o-

Next

[andrewsneil]

Re: your Regulus as Draco rip-off post.. agree one thousand percent. Regulus is given so many traits that are outright stolen from other Slytherins in the story. And the thing is, I wouldn't even care so much if 1) the situations and traits they are ripping off weren't cheapened, flattened, and done poorly for the sake of babygirlifying Regulus and 2) they didn't look down on fans of the characters they are ripping off.

Fanon Regulus being "forced into being a Death Eater" Pfft OKAY. Fanon Regulus being a sarcastic mildly antagonistic Slytherin interested in a Gryffindor Potter. Do they not see that they're describing Drarry? Or fanon Regulus being an antisocial potions prodigy who spies on Voldemort to protect someone he loves and dies fighting for the light. Yeah no that's not Regulus's story.

Fanon Regulus is endowed with all of these compelling traits and arcs from other canon characters, with none of the nuance present in their originators, because idk they can't seem to handle it or something. And yet they dare to look down on fans of Draco, Drarry, or Snape? It's so brazenly hypocritical.

no bc i get what ur saying and ur right!! like. in canon we know absolutely fucking nothing about regulus black ok. like. we know his name. we know he started hogwarts in 72. he was a slytherin, he became a death eater at sixteen, he had a collage of death eater propaganda on his bedroom wall, sirius described him as quite naive and said he was reminded by his parents that regulus was a better son, and then he had his plot w/ voldemort and died at 17/18 and thats it!! obv our two sources on regulus's personality come from regulus and kreacher but they are both two VERY biased sources. we don't really know much about his personality other than that he was raised believing his parents bigotry unlike sirius, that he was pretty smart and what we can infer from him being sorted into slytherin. other than that literally allllll of it is pulled straight from draco malfoy, mainly draco in drarry fics. i haven't read many other fics ft. different draco ships, i don't love dramione but i'm assuming he is similarly characterised - maybe just more "oh feel sorry for me i am so tortured and mysterious - in them. and don't get me wrong, draco and regulus ARE similar. one of my favourite parts abt the golden trio vs. marauders eras is that characters seem to intentionally mirror each other? and also, they correct the 'mistakes' of the past gen's lives. like. sirius and harry are so fucking similar, but harry actually. survived? and hermione and lily are clear mirrors. even snape and luna, i admit i really don't like snape, but luna is so similar except the fact that... despite her getting teased and bullied she never became cruel? and neville, just like peter he lived in the shadow of ron, hermione and harry but he never resented them for it. however it's one thing to draw parallels between the characters and another to kinda just. blatantly rip off someone's entire personality but also??? try and make them a good person. like regulus black fans will do ANYTHING to insist he is not a bad person bc he's babygirl and he can do no wrong. which. babe. its fine if you're joking but like some of them are serious about it!!!

and like. the real infuriating part is that the average jegulus fan will shit on draco malfoy and drarry as a concept like. babe. you are sat there reading a DRARRY fic, basically. if you downloaded a jegulus fic or a drarry fic and reversed the names, ignored the chronological fuck ups and such, they would read exactly the same!!!!!

(i put it under the cut because i know i have a lot more to say!)

don't get me wrong, even if we strip away alllll of both of draco and regulus's fanon elements, they still have parallels. jkr probably created reg for the plot elements but also to mirror draco. she compared them in an interview one time, she said that they both got into the death eaters too deeply, they were attracted to it at first but that the reality of what it meant to be a death eater was way too much to handle. yeah. however even if regulus was freaked out by the concept of ritual sacrifices and brutal massacres and voldemort killing his house elf, he still hated muggleborns and believed in blood purity - which. is a thing that regulus fans commonly just cut out of fics? i've never read a drarry fic where draco didn't believe his parents were correct. but also their situations are a little different because whilst draco genuinely didn't have anyone in his life who didn't believe in blood purity, regulus did. sirius 100% tried to explain to him that their parents were liars and there wasn't anything wrong or different about muggleborns however he didn't listen. which jegulus fans seem to always coincidentally forget? and yeah okay, it's a fic. embellesh a little. break canon if you'd like. but the second you obsess over and love a character who is literally the wizard equivalent of a nazi and a canon blood purist despite having multiple opportunities for an out, you completely lose the ability to shit on any other character for doing the same thing. you can't shit on bellatrix for murder or evan and barty for being death eaters or anything. and it's insane to me because they dont!!!!!!! they dont shit on bellatrix OR evan and barty and its not even in the sense of like.... enjoying a morally grey nuanced character? the average regulus/jegulus stan strips away every single morally grey and. awful thing about reg and the slytherin skittles just to??? idk. validate it in their own mind. that it is ok to like and enjoy a bad person.

(on the topic of snape - i don't get how regulus fans can dump on him either? like. okay. i hate snape. however my reasons for hating snape are more so to do with the fact that his incel behaviour and obsession with lily genuinely freaks me out so fucking much, and there is absolutely no way you can defend a man who vindictively bullied an eleven year old just because that boy could have been the chosen one, and if he had been then maybe lily wouldn't have died, to the extent where when neville was thirteen snape was his BIGGEST fear. this boy was dropped out of a window by his own uncle, spent years terrified that he would be a squib, WHOSE OWN PARENTS WERE TORTURED TO THE POINT OF INSANITY BY BELLATRIX LESTRANGE and his TEACHER was his biggest fear. that's my issue with him. however. the average regulus fan doesn't give a shit about lily evans, the majority of them villainise her because james loves her - and god forbid that man loves a woman and ur no longer interested in fetishising his relationship!!!!!!!!! either that or they make her a lesbian and pair her off with usually either mary or pandora because they have to physically make her unattracted to men so she won't threaten jegulus. like. i like marylily. i like jegulus. i like jily. i lOVE pandora/lily. one of my favourite lily ships is her and marlene, i'm a sucker for the jock x nerd dynamic! but. you don't have to make her not romantic and sexually interested in MEN just so she isn't a threat to jegulus. that's misogynistic. it is actually possible to not want to fuck a certain man even if you like their general species! lily went six years not wanting to date that man, she can continue to do so in your fic whilst still being attracted to men. it's. odd? why not just make her bisexual?? ah, yeah, because you don't want james to be an option at ALL. anyway sorry i got distracted however my point stands.)

idk man i say all of this whilst Enjoying jegulus and regulus. i hate fics that write him as some sort of completely innocent in no way bad person, but the fics where he genuinely is... self serving and morally grey and only really cares about himself and the people he loves and values? yeah. theyre enjoyable. however that entire personality is just stolen from fucking draco. you can tell bc it came about in 2019/2020 when jegulus got super popular and im 99% sure it was just because all the draco malfoy/drarry stans got pissed off with dracotok and HIS morally grey personality and general... dickish cruel horrible behaviour being ripped away? and even jegulus's dynamic - it's JUST drarry. there is no other way around it. and it's so fucking frustrating when reg stans actively dump on drarry and draco as a character WHEN THEIR FAVE IS HIS CHARACTER.

tdlr: i don't hate regulus, i think he's interesting. i enjoy him in a lot of fics. however it's so fucking frustrating when people that love him a. strip away every single negative part of his character in an attempt to justify themselves liking him when... he isn't that guy. regulus black is a child who believed in his parents bigotry and got in too deep and then died making a last ditch attempt to kill voldemort Not because he genuinely didn't believe in his cause but because voldemort pissed him off by trying to kill kreacher! and b. that jegulus fans regularly shit on draco malfoy when... he's the original? and they hate drarry meanwhile almost every single version of jegulus's dynamic is just blatantly them, whether the authors are aware of it or not.

[blxetsi]

HIIIII!! can i get a pieck finger dating headcanons if that’s alright with you of course? your stuff makes me soft, stay safe!

yuh ‼️ tysm for your request

pieck finger dating headcanons (modern au)

pieck finger x gn!reader

warnings: literal fluff, no angst or anything i love pieck

- bc pieck is assumed to be like 23-26 this wont be a uni au or anything

- idk i rlly think you guys wouldve met in a mundane way

- like you bump into her on the sidewalk and try to the really awkward "oh im so sorry i didnt see you there- no really it was my fault- are you sure youre okay ?- okay great- no im not hurt- yeah- okay have a good day and again im so sorry !!" thing with her

- and then maybe you guys see each other again at a coffee place, youre there with your friends and shes there with hers, and you dont wanna talk to her obv bc that would be awkward

- then ur friend makes u go and order another coffee for them, and while youre waiting for your order pieck comes and stands beside you

- and shes very observant yknow ?? if she sees a face its very hard for her to forget it

- so she immediately recognizes you and blurts out "its you !"

- and you have to be like "oh yeah ! it is me ! its you too"

- she finds it quite cute and giggles about it

- a very laidback person but also a very blunt person

- she doesnt find any harm in asking "can i get your instagram @" look she doesnt wanna be a creep and ask for ur number right at the start

- and it gives her a chance to find out what kind of person you are

- it would absolutely suck for her if such a cute face was posting fishing pictures and alt right propaganda yknow ??

- so you two do and then both of your orders come so you two give awkward goodbyes before going back to your groups

- her instagram is very pretty, nice themes

- she posted a couple of hours ago, with her and her friends in a park, taking a couple of posed photos while some looking like they were natural

- shes adorable and you cant help but feel your cheeks go warm as you basically stalk her page

- she dms you and says "are you too busy looking at my feed that you havent followed me yet ?" and you see this mf staring at you across the room like 👁️👁️

- okay nosy lets calm down now 🙄🤚

- you try to defend urself but ur typing so quick you keep making errors in your writing, she ends up saying something else

"you know, i was doing the exact same thing. youre beautiful you know"

- thank you pieck 🥰

- over the next couple of weeks thats how you two communicate. she'll send you instagram memes and edits of her favourite shows, movies, games etc. and you find yourself having a lot in common w her

- you check her story so frequently it becomes one of the first accounts on the top of your homepage

- and FINALLY, when she feels she can see you as a friend and not just some pretty stranger she met on the street she asks you out

- it was a simple thing, just to the movies, and she even let you pick which one !! (imagine its pre covid idfk)

- you two go and its an awkward hug before you both head inside

- you pay for your tickets and she gets an extra large popcorn and a drink

- you assume shes just v hungry but before you can order yourself something shes like "what are you doing i got this for us !!"

- rlly cute bitch omfg

- during the movies, after she eats literally most of the fucking popcorn, she pulls your hand out of your lap and holds it with her buttery one 🥰🤚

- this bitch had crumbs and didnt even think to wipe them off

- you still held her hand tho anyways

- after that night you parted ways in front of the theater after making sure you two would be getting home safe

- and that became routine for a couple of weeks, not going to the movies obviously bc thats expensive but watching movies together !! youd go over to her apartment or she would come over to yours

- one thing about pieck is that shes very touchy

- one way or another she will end up cuddled with you on the couch

- it doesnt matter if its you being forcefully pulled on top of her body or her draping herself over you like shes a blanket, you two WILL be cuddling and you WILL enjoy it

- but finally, as if the gods gave you mercy, she finally kissed you

- it felt so nice, her lips were soft and sticky from her lip gloss and she tasted like the swedish berries you had gotten for her to munch on

- and the rest of the movie you two just sat there, kissing each other and giggling like teens

- she ended up staying the night, and complimented your bedsheets

- your relationship moved pretty fast after that

- she had already told all of her friends about you, they werent very surprised

- when you got officially introduced her friends zeke and porco tried to do that whole "if you hurt her.." speech before she slapped them and had marcel pull you away to safety

- other than that the night was very fun, you got to talking about your career, why you moved to the city, and other mundane topics

- pieck is actually a graphic designer, and everytime she comes to sleep over she just HAS to bring her laptop with her

- its basically just her laying in between your legs while she types away, youll pet her hair and lay soft kisses on her neck, and occasionally ask what shes doing

- she likes to tell you, has no problem in answering the questions you have, even if you think theyre stupid ones, shes very soft with you

- also a bit of a trickster

- for your first april fools together she slept over, you didnt have anything planned for her bc youre a good person and wont hurt the ones you love

- she stuffed your breakfast muffin with mustard 😁👍

- you gave her the cold shoulder for the rest of the day until she apologized by getting you a new muffin

- now she always dropped the l bomb to you, but she never needed you to say it

- thats why, when you were helping her cook dinner at her place you softly said "see ? and thats why i love you" she kind of,,, stopped what she was doing

- you realized why she wasnt washing the knife she used to cut your vegetables and tried to backtrack, but it was too late, she was already tackling you into a hug and taking you down onto the floor

- she just gave you kisses while repeating "i love you i love you i love you" over and over again

- bc of her you burnt ur fucking chicken smh

- you spent that night eating junk food and watching movies

- piecks a very observant person, so she always knows when youre sad too

- when you give that little huff when you come home to your (new !) shared apartment she knows something is up

- she'll slowly trail behind you as you walk to your bedroom, stripping to your underwear and changing into your pajamas

- you crawl into bed just wanting a nap to forget about the day, and she'll crawl in with you and hold you

- you never like to cry but youre so frustrated and upset at your coworkers, at that rude customer, at those deadlines, that you just breakdown

- and she lets you, she lets you almost suffocate yourself in her chest with how much your pushing your head into it, she strokes your hair while you choke on your own cries and hands you tissues when you need to blow your nose

- "what do you need my love ?" "i just need you" "okay baby"

- communication is a big thing in the relationship, and because shes been so open and honest from the beginning, talking about how you feel has never been easier

- in fact, you like talking about how you feel about your relationship, or how you didnt like what pieck said to your friends the other day, this and that, you feel comfortable and safe with pieck no matter what, which makes talking about even the most hardest things seem so simple and natural

- all in all, even when she wakes you up with spontaneous ice cream dates or asks that you put raisins in the popcorn during movie night, even with the fights and the crying and the exhaustion the next day, life would be much duller without her, and you only have to thank your clumsy self

uhh i feel like this is very short but yeah ❤️ requests are open so go crazy mfs ‼️

[twh-news]

"Loki" Director Kate Herron Talks The Epic Season 1 Finale And The Easter Egg Fans Should Go Back And Listen For | Buzzfeed

Warning: There are MASSIVE spoilers ahead for Season 1 of Loki!

Welp, Loki Season 1 just came to an end and I think it's safe to say that the Marvel Cinematic Universe will never be the same. Following the Season 1 finale, we sat down with director Kate Herron to talk about everything — like how it felt introducing the multiverse and Jonathan Majors to the MCU, casting this incredible ensemble cast, Loki's bisexuality, and so much more. Here's everything we learned:

1. First, Kate has always loved Loki, so she knew she wanted to be involved in the "character's next step" in some way.

"Basically, I love Loki, and I found out they were making a show about him. As a fan, I was like, 'I need to know where he's gone.' Then, I just wanted to know what the story was going to be. I loved the character. I think Tom Hiddleston's performance is amazing. I really wanted to be part of whatever this character's next step was because I think Loki's had one of the best arcs in the MCU."

2. Directing all six episodes of the first season felt like filming a six-hour movie.

"Directing all six episodes was a really unique experience, right? Because normally TV is run through the showrunner system, and Marvel didn't do that on Loki. It was incredible. It was quite an undertaking to do six hours and run it like a giant film. I'm so grateful for the opportunity, and I'm really proud of what we made."

3. When Kate signed on to Loki, only the first few scripts had been written, the "rough shape of the show" was in place, and they knew Loki would be arrested by the TVA.

"When I started, Michael [Waldron] had written the pilot. Then, there was a second episode written by Elissa [Karasik], and Bisha's [Ali] episode was written. So, there was a rough shape of the show. It was already fixed in that Loki was gonna be arrested by the TVA and then it had this twist that he was going to try and solve the mystery of who this other Loki was, but then it pivots and becomes this love story about him falling in love with himself. I just thought that was so inspired and the message that had about self-love. I just really wanted to be part of that."

4. And they always knew the show would end at The Citadel at the End of Time and the multiverse would be born.

"As we dug into it with Kevin Wright, our producer, the studio, Michael, Tom, and also our whole team, I think it was always thinking like what was the best story, in particular during the second half of the show. We always knew they were going to The Citadel, something would happen, and the multiverse would be born, but we didn't necessarily know it would come out of Loki and Sylvie fighting. That idea came out of discussions with me, the writers, and the studio."

5. It was "always the plan" to introduce Jonathan Majors to the MCU during the Loki Season 1 finale.

"I think me and the writers were just like, 'Well, they haven't told us we can't introduce that character. I guess we're doing it.' It was really exciting and I felt really honored that I got to be part of it."

6. Kate was involved with Jonathan's casting for He Who Remains/Kang alongside Peyton Reed, who will direct Ant-Man: Quantumania, and Marvel Studios.

"Being part of the casting discussion with Marvel and Peyton was amazing. It was massive. I was just like, 'Wow, I can't believe I get to be part of this conversation.' Everyone was just so excited about Jonathan. He's one of the best actors. I just couldn't believe we got him."

7. Jonathan brought a lot of "cool ideas to the table" once he was cast, and Kate gave him "space to play."

"He just brought so many cool ideas to the table. I think when you're working with an actor like Jonathan, it's really just about giving him space to play, and let him find the character and give him a cool way to do that. I really enjoyed working with him. We finished the shoot filming in The Citadel, so it was really interesting that we finished filming with Jonathan. I just felt very lucky I got to direct him."

8. Jonathan actually voiced the Time-Keepers in Episode 4, which added to the Wizard of Oz homage.

"Obviously, the Time-Keepers were being made in post, and we hadn't cast anyone [for the voices] yet, and I thought, 'Well, Wizard of Oz. Like it should be the wizard, right?' So I thought it would be cool if it was Jonathan, and I think the key thing then was just working with him in a way that we could disguise his voice. I think the fun thing was, Jonathan is an amazing character actor. So we just sent him the art and he was sending audio clips to me and Kevin Wright and being like, 'What about this voice?' It was just so much fun to do that with him. I think that was just joyful."

9. Kate's favorite Easter egg from Episode 5 was Throg — in fact, Chris Hemsworth recorded new lines and sounds for that small part.

"That one I was very proud of and it was very fun. I had that shot designed for a while. I think I'd seen it in Futurama, and a lot of animation does it, but I love the idea of going through the dirt and it reveals something. I always felt like that shot would be the place to insert an Easter egg. When we had Throg in there, it was so much fun and it was perfect. We also recorded Chris [Hemsworth] for that. It was just so much fun."

10. She also loved the Thanos Copter and said it was a "funny" detail the producers loved from the comics, so they had to include it.

"The Thanos Copter was great. Kevin Wright, our executive producer, was really obsessed with that copter, I was like, 'We have to put the helicopter,' and it was so funny. Episode 5 is our best Easter egg episode. There's so much deliberately because of the nature of The Void as a place where deleted things are sent."

11. There's one Easter egg/detail Kate hasn't seen fans catch onto yet, and it involves a "familiar" voice at the very end of the Season 1 finale.

"The one I would say is — it's less Easter egg and more cool story-wise. So, at the very end of the finale, when Loki is in this alternate TVA, there's a character that runs behind him and is going to the armory and people should listen to the voice. It's very quick, but it's someone familiar."

12. Loki was inspired by numerous iconic sci-fi movies, like Children of Men, Alien, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Metropolis, Starship Troopers, and more.

"Bisha, in the episode [she wrote], she spoke about Children of Men and also Before Sunrise as a reference, so I was really inspired by that and the idea of bringing these sci-fi things together. Across all the TVA, I wanted it to just be a big love letter to sci-fi movies, like Metropolis, Brazil, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, [and] Alien. A reference I could never talk about early was Starship Troopers just because, obviously, the TVA are bad guys and in that movie they also use a lot of propaganda film and we had our Miss Minutes film. So, that movie played a hand. There was so much across the show. We had references from everywhere."

13. And the inspiration for how The Void would look in Episode 5 actually came from Teletubbies.

"I never really spoke much about it, but basically in Episode 5, The Void was originally written like a desert, but when I pitched, I said I thought it would be cool if rather than like a Mad Max desert apocalypse, it's more like an overgrown garden. Like, this is the place where the TVA throw their rubbish in. I just loved the idea of that. I think I realized as it started to unravel that I'd basically pitched the British countryside. As we were building it, I was like, 'Am I just homesick?' I remember trying to explain it to the visual effects artists who were making it, and I was like, 'You know, it's like the Teletubbies. You know, rolling hills just one after another.' So, yeah, the Teletubbies became a useful reference when describing The Void. So, that's how they played a hand in it."

14. Kate was the one who suggested Sophia Di Martino audition for the role of Sylvie.

"Sophia was in a short film of mine called Smear. I was very happy to pay her, finally, for her talent. When we were reading for the role, I was like, 'There's this actor I know and I think we should ask if she wants to read.' Everyone was like, 'Yeah, sure.' So, she read in these audition tapes, and we were all watching the tapes back and I remember everyone at the studio was like, 'Wait, who's that?' And I was like, 'Oh, that's my friend Sophia.' They thought she was amazing."

15. Sophia's audition tape was so good that she was immediately cast.

"Basically, everyone was really excited by her tape and I think she got cast in the room, which is incredible. I was excited because I got to bring my friend along. She's such a good actor. She's fantastic in Flowers and I was just so happy that she was coming along for the ride. I think she's done such a beautiful job with Sylvie."

16. One of the most important things when crafting Sylvie and the other Loki Variants was making sure they were their own characters, and not just Loki copies.

"I think the most important thing, minus just tiny little gestures, was really making it important that Sylvie was her own character and that all the Lokis weren't just 'faded photocopies.' They were all their own Loki. It wasn't even that they stood in a similar way or looked similar, but what in their soul made them a Loki. I love that line, 'Lokis always survive.' That idea goes across all our characters who are Lokis."

17. Casting Sylvie was one of the hardest things, and Sophia was able to bring her own spin to the character and she was the perfect "sparring partner" for Tom.

"Sophia has this talent — and I think Tom has it as well — where she's so funny and naturally so witty and charismatic that you can't take your eyes off her. She's also really good at playing characters with a lot of anger, pain, and vulnerability. I just felt that those qualities were so Loki to me. She brought her own spin on it too. Tom's performance is so iconic, so Sylvie was a tough role to cast because you need to give him a good sparring partner, but also, it's another Loki and people love Loki. So, it was really making sure that she felt distinctive enough that she was different, but also that we gave Tom a really fun actor to play alongside. It was really fun watching them. It was really fun seeing their chemistry grow."

18. Sylvie's fighting style was actually crafted to have similar movements to Loki's, thus showing that they are basically two sides of the same coin.

"I know Tom and Sophia spent a lot of time together. I think the fun thing with Sophia was the little things, like the fighting styles. She has a very different life to our Loki. Loki is very balletic in his fighting style, because he grew up in the palace, whereas Sylvie grew up in apocalypses. So, she was going to fight a bit more like a feral cat. I thought that was fun to play with. We worked with Mo [Ganderton], our stunt coordinator, and it was really fun to find little mirror image stuff they would do when they fight. We did a little bit of that on Lamentis and there's little bits here and there where we've done that. There's also little gestures that they do that are quite similar."

19. Kate had a "four hour" phone call with Owen Wilson before he was cast. They talked about Marvel, Mobius, and Loki.

"Everyone was so excited to cast him. I remember, they were like, 'Kate, just call him and see if he's up for it.' That was a lot of pressure. But then, I spoke to him on the phone and we spoke about Marvel and Loki in Marvel. Also, we talked about what our show was doing, who Mobius was, and then just getting his take on it. It was a very detailed conversation. I think we spoke for like four hours. At the end, he was like, 'I'm in.'"

20. Wunmi Mosaku's role was originally supposed to be a male character, but Kate suggested having an "open casting" because she thought Hunter B-15 would be really great as a female character.

"When I spoke to the studio, I was like, 'This character is cool, but I just think it could be really interesting if this was a female character. So, could we do open casting? We'll have men and women read, and we'll just see who's the best person for the role.' So, Wunmi read for it and just blew everyone away. We were like, 'We have to cast this person!' So, we kind of remade the role, really, around her."

21. Kate loves the idea that Hunter B-15 joins this club of sci-fi female characters who were originally supposed to be men.

"It was cool because I love Ripley in Alien and I love Kara Thrace in Battlestar Galactica. In the original Battlestar, Kara Thrace's character was played by a man, and Ripley in Alien was originally written as a man, so I liked that Hunter B-15 was joining these badass women in sci-fi. That was really cool to me."

22. When Kate pitched her ideas to the studio, she include Gugu Mbatha-Raw as the actor she wanted to play Ravonna.

"Gugu was in my pitch when I spoke to the studio. I was like, 'I think she'll be really great.' I love her work as an actor. From Belle to the episode of Black Mirror she's in, everything she's in is so different. I think that's so interesting with Ravonna because in the comics, Ravonna's been good and bad, and she's such a big character. I was like, 'I'd love to see Gugu's take on that character.' The studio was really excited by that and so was Gugu."

23. Kate said it was "important" to recognize Loki's bisexuality in the show, and she loved how it was naturally worked into a conversation between him and Sylvie.

"It was just important for us to do it in a way that made it canon, acknowledged it, and also done in a way where like, if someone asked me, I would just be matter of fact about it, like, 'Yeah, I'm bi.' I think that was the important thing for it and building it into the conversation. It was important to the whole team and the way that it was written was really beautiful. It felt like the right place to do it because these two characters are starting to open up to each other and are being a bit more honest about who they are. So it felt like the right place to have that moment."

24. The TVA weren't always going to be Variants/humans. That idea was born out of conversations with Kate, the writers, and the rest of the Loki team.

"When I started, I think it was a bit more up in the air with like, who are the Variants who work for the TVA? Are they Variants? They actually weren't Variants when I first joined. Casey was an alien, for example. I think something we all locked onto was it was more effective to make them more human. It was already in there that the Time-Keepers wouldn't be real and that would be a big Wizard of Oz rug pull. But the extra rug pull we added was that, on top of all of that, the TVA don't realize that they're actually Variants."

25. One of the things Kate enjoyed the most was figuring out the "inner workings of the TVA," like how the Minutemen would operate.

"I think it was really fun, in terms of the bigger structural stuff, to work with everyone. Also, figuring out the inner workings of the TVA, like every squad of Minutemen would have a hunter and they'll be little details sprinkled across all the world building in the show. Generally, we always looked at the characters and what was the best story and how to get to the end goal in the most effective way."

26. The season finale intro — which included seeing space, the sacred timeline, and hearing quotes from the MCU and history — was an homage to Contact.

"Basically, Eric Martin, our writer, he'd written in this amazing idea that for the opening we do an homage to Contact, and kind of move through space to the end of time. Then, we'd see the physical timeline, and then we see The Citadel. I love Contact, and I was like, 'Oh, that's so cool.' We took that idea to Darrin [Denlinger], our storyboard artist, and me and him just nerded out about space and about how we wanted to pay homage to Contact but not be completely the same.

So we played with the idea of time and he was bringing in so many cool ideas. But then, the amazing pitch he had as well was like, 'What if when we pull out at the very end, the timeline isn't a straight line like how you guys have been showing it in the show? What if it's actually circular?' I thought it was such a good idea."

27. Kevin Feige helped come up with the idea to include Marvel quotes over the Marvel logo because it was something the MCU had never done before.

"I had this weird idea where I remember saying to my editor, Emma McCleave, I was like, 'Oh, can we add a baby crying or the sounds of the city? And it's like we just hear life.' So her, me, and Kevin Wright got really into that. So we were adding all of these different sounds into the timeline. We also had quotes from just life, not Marvel. Then, we showed that cut to Kevin Feige and the rest of the team.

They all thought it was cool, and then Kevin Feige was like, 'Oh, do you know what? We've never done quotes on the Marvel logo before.' So, we thought that was cool and we added the quotes to the Marvel logo intro. Then, me, Kevin Wright, Emma, and Sarah Bennett, Emma's assistant, decided to just put the MCU quotes across the whole thing."

28. Going from hearing all of the voices in the season finale opening to utter silence in The Citadel was also a way of learning something about He Who Remains.

"I loved the idea of all the noise and this Greek chorus building because when you finally pull out and see The Citadel and how isolated it is, it tells you so much about He Who Remains' psychology because he's surrounded by all this brimming life, but he's completely isolated and alone. I thought it tells you a little bit about his character and who he might be before we see him."29. Kate loves that the season finale opening is a "beautiful handover" from the previous phase of the Marvel Cinematic Universe into this one with the multiverse.

"It was a real group effort, and we were just really excited at the idea of it being this really beautiful handover from the previous phase of Marvel. Also, we get to encapsulate a little bit of our world as well, which was really fun. The editing team put so much time into that. I really want to watch it in a planetarium or something."

29. Kate loves that the season finale opening is a "beautiful handover" from the previous phase of the Marvel Cinematic Universe into this one with the multiverse.

"It was a real group effort, and we were just really excited at the idea of it being this really beautiful handover from the previous phase of Marvel. Also, we get to encapsulate a little bit of our world as well, which was really fun. The editing team put so much time into that. I really want to watch it in a planetarium or something."

30. And finally, even though Loki sets up a lot of upcoming MCU projects — namely, Spider-Man: No Way Home, Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, and Ant-Man: Quantumania — Kate didn't have a lot of conversations with other MCU directors and writers.

"Kevin Wright and Stephen Broussard from Marvel were our producers on Loki, and they worked with Kevin Feige, Louis [D'Esposito], and Victoria [Alonso]. They always steered us in terms of the Marvel big picture and let us know if anything was off base. It's so secretive at Marvel, so I only spoke to Peyton just because our timelines crossed [with Jonathan]. Generally, Marvel manages everything internally and keeps us all in check."

[javajunkieao3]

Afterbirth:  A Post-Series Osblaine Fanfic

Summary:  What happens when the fighting stops?  Nick and June find out.

It took time for everything to calm down after Fred, the forest and everything that came after.  In a simple story, Nick would come back to Canada with June and turn himself over to the authorities with information in exchange for immunity.  In a more romantic one, they would escape together.  But, that didn’t happen.  At least not right away.  Nick returned to Gilead and June returned to Canada, neither of them entirely content with their decisions.  But they had a duty.  June, to try to rebuild what she had left behind.  Nick, to destroy it.

           Neither were particularly successful at first.  June was originally going to leave, but Luke convinced her to stay, still unwilling to give in even when confronted with the worst of her character.  But, it was futile.  Luke wanted his wife back, but she died in that forest seven years ago.  For weeks, they circled each other like wounded animals, trying not to spook the other while piecing together a relationship that no longer fit.  June didn’t want to accept it.  All that time, she had been fighting to get back to Luke.  But, when she looked back, it wasn’t that straight-forward.  She had stopped fighting for Luke a long time ago.  

           Back in Gilead, Nick was met with a nation teeming with renewed patriotism.  The Waterford saga had stirred the nation’s sentiment.  No doubt helped along by a steady dose of propaganda put out by the State. Everyone else just didn’t understand.  They were poisoned by immorality that rotted them to the core.  To where they couldn’t see the righteous good that Gilead had done. They didn’t understand.  They never could.

           It was maddening.

           “You made a real fucked up place,” Nick said to Joseph, swirling the bourbon around his glass slowly.

           Joseph took a sip of his own, jaw tight.  “Right back at you.”  Settling back into his seat, he wryly added, “Talk about buyer’s remorse.”

           “It’s up to us to fix it.  To end it.”

           Joseph looked over, eyes cloudy behind his glasses. “I know.”

           In the end, it was Gilead’s own pride that brought its ruin.  In the early days, when salvagings were more frequent, and brutal, each one was videotaped.  They were initially used in the Red Center as cautionary tales.  Stay in line, or you’ll end up on the end of a rope.  In the beginning, it was effective.  Back when people still thought there was an end in sight.  But then, people lost hope and, with that, fear.  Resistance bred, messages sent through muffins and scones. Eventually the videos were phased out of the Red Center, and they were supposed to be destroyed, but like many things that the Commanders were supposed to do, they didn’t.  

           Seven years later, the videos had their grand debut on the landing page of the online New York Times and went viral.  In another setting, Gilead would have been proud. They were front-page news.  The troops came a week later.

           Both Nick and Joseph offered themselves up, promising a look at the inner workings of Gilead and enough information to indict every other Commander rounded up in exchange for immunity.  Waterford had provided limited information before his death, so it was an enticing proposition.  Joseph had always been meticulous with his paperwork, and he handed it all over to the Canadian government.  A paper trail all the way back to the first insurrection.

           “You might want to get yourself some snacks. It’s a long read.”

           At first, it didn’t seem like the deal would go through, but then it did.  Joseph called it a political move, but secretly, Nick thought something else.  Stepping out of the Provincial Court of Law, sun bathing his face, Nick believed for the first time in miracles.  But, there was still one more to go.  And she was sitting on a bench.

           His feet moved of their own accord, and when he was in front of her, he murmured, “How did you know I was being released today?”

           June gave him a sliver of a smile.  “I have my ways.”

           He crouched in front of her, instinctively resting his hands on her knees.  After a second, he realized he didn’t know if he could still touch her here.  A lot could change in six months.   Regimes fall. Relationships change.  But when he pulled back his hands, she quickly grabbed onto them and held his hands in her lap.   Her grip was tight and he noticed then that her eyes were filled with tears.  He quickly moved closer, bracing one hand on her jaw as he said, “Hey, it’s okay.  It’s okay, June.”

           “I know it is,” she said, grinning wide.  “It’s more than okay.  You’re here.”

           It had been rare to see her this incandescently happy back in Gilead, and Nick decided that he never wanted to see her another way.  He kissed her and when she kissed him back, for the first time in months, he felt at peace.

           “How is Hannah?” he asked.  When the Canadian troops had taken control of Gilead, he used what weight he had left to make sure Hannah was on the first flight out to Canada.

           June grinned, wiping at her eyes.  “She’s good.  Really good.  It was difficult at first.  She was confused with everything.  But, she’s settled in now. Obsessed with her little sister.  She wants to hold her all the time.”

           Nick felt as if he had no breath when he asked, “How is she?”

           June covered her hand with his.  “Our daughter is beautiful.”

           She stood up and tugged his hand for him to do the same.  “Come on, let’s go see her.”

           “Where?”

            June looked over at him.  “Home.”

           Home.

           Part of June had been worried that she and Nick wouldn’t know how to be together without Gilead.  They had lived and loved with such intensity since the beginning, that she didn’t know what it would look like for them to lead a normal life. Have breakfast together.  Watch Netflix.  Go grocery shopping.  It turned out, it looked a lot like how she remembered.  There wasn’t much time for it during the trial.  Nick had to be there every day and she went of her own accord, sitting in the back and watching the testimony.  She expected to feel something at it all coming to an end.  Maybe happiness.  Relief. But, all she felt was tired.  She had spent the better part of the last seven years fighting Gilead.  She was finally ready to leave it behind.  

           She and Nick planned to celebrate the end of the trial with a dinner out, but they ended up ordering takeout and falling asleep by ten.  When she woke up the next morning, sunlight came in through the half-open blinds, bathing Nick’s face in a warm, golden glow.  She snuggled closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder.  His arm tightened around her waist.

           “Good morning,” he said, brushing a kiss against her hair.

           “Good morning.”

           They laid together for a while, not talking, and then she murmured, “It’s really over, isn’t it?”

           “There could be appeals.”

           “There probably will be," she said sardonically. “But, the damage is done.  That place.  Those people.  It’s over.”

           She knew it was an over-simplification.  They both did.  Gilead had always been more than a place.  It was a belief system.  But, after what had come out during the trial, it could never take hold the way it had.  Not for a long while.

           “It’s over,” he agreed.

           They laid there for a few minutes, silence stretching between them and punctuated by the sound of children playing outside, and June asked, “How do you feel about pancakes?”

           “Pancakes?”

           She nodded.  “I have a mix.  And chocolate chips.  I always make them when I have Hannah.  So far, I’ve gotten no complaints.”

           “She’s eleven,” he deadpanned.

           She turned on her stomach, resting her chin on his chest.  “I think we have some bacon in the refrigerator, too.  And eggs.”

           He grinned.  “That all sounds good.”

           They got out of bed, June tossing over her shoulder for Nick to get Nicole from her crib, and then she was making pancakes, singing along to some music she put on her phone.  Nick made eggs, burning the first batch, but then getting the second just right.  They made the bacon in the microwave, a convenience that June still found novel after her time in Gilead.  They sat down together, Nick cutting up small bits of pancake and eggs for Nicole.  It was odd sometimes to think that this much joy had come from such a joyless place.  But it had. One of life’s mysteries, Aunt Lydia would say.  Probably followed by the cattle prodder.  June wondered then if this was her real triumph over Gilead.  Not escaping, but finding something good within its festering walls.

           “June?”

           Nick’s voice brought her out of her thoughts.  “Yeah?”

           “I asked what you wanted to do today.”

It was a simple question.  A simple answer, too, that still felt revelatory.

           June picked up a piece of bacon and took a bite off the end.  “Whatever we want.”

[reina-morada]

1-4 💞

Just going to repost 1 and 3 here even though I already answered them!

1. A saint that influenced you either by their life or writings?

Ohhh there’s really so many, but my top saint would probably be Juana Inés de La Cruz. I absolutely adore her poetry. Secondly I would say, Teresa of Ávila. The Interior Castle is a classic.

Additionally for this ask, Julian of Norwich.

2. Favorite places to pray?

Anywhere outside, especially during dawn or desk. Allah is never closer to me than when I'm in the midst of a gorgeous sunset. Every day he paints them new for me, it's so humbling and exciting. I'm really in love with him when he does that.

3. What is one of the devotions you have?

From the last post: Precious Blood of Jesus, the Holy Wounds, the Seven Sorrows of Mary, the Stations of the Cross (+Marian Stations), and the Sacred Heart.

4. Tell us about a divine experience.

This one is long so here's a cut!

I had my dark night of the soul in Palestine. That morning, we had attended an outdoor mass led by our priest in a field in Bethlehem. It was sunny and breezy that day. It was so beautiful. The wind reminds me of Allah, and reminds me of his presence in my life. I sent lots of dua through the wind to him in gratitude. After years of dreaming, I was there to see these places I'd read about in person. We explored the Church of the Nativity and had lunch, then walked some. The next day, we were planning to visit the Dome of the Rock. As a revert, I was very scared about being rejected at the entrance, because they ask you to recite Surah al-Fatihah or Ayat al-kursi to prove you're Muslim and I still wasn't confident in my ability to do it.

Our final activity of the day was the Holocaust Museum in the city. It's very much like a maze, and you have to walk through it all to really get out. In the few hours we spent there, I had been drained of all hope for humanity. To see the horrors and the evil we possess in us so clearly shook me to my core. It was even worse seeing the propaganda at the end, knowing that so much rhetoric has been used to justify abuse against Palestinian citizens. There were many things that horrified me while I was there, and I knew that God was not real. If he was, we'd been abandoned easily. How could evil like this find its way into the world, if God was real? By the time we exited the museum, the sky was dark, and a storm was rolling in. Exactly how I felt inside.

That night, everyone went to dinner without me. I didn't let anyone know what was going on, but I just couldn't go out and save face while my core had been rocked. Everyone else on the trip was there for fun and as tourists, but I had seen it as religious pilgrimage that had ended up with no purpose at all. I stayed in my hotel room crying about the realization while the storm ranged on outside. Cried and cried all night, thinking that my four years of getting a theology degree had been for nothing.

Eventually, the storm calmed, and I was exhausted. In the brief moments of stillness, I sat and waited as the wind died down, then fell asleep. It was our first night in that particular hotel, so I didn't realize it was next to a mosque. Before dawn, the call to prayer sounded from the tower of the masjid. I opened my eyes in the darkness and listened. Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar. I got up. I went to my bathroom to make wudu and I prayed salah. In the silence after, I realized that the shaitan had come at me with the ultimate test: to stop me from entering and praying in a masjid where one prayer was worth ten thousand. I had finally gotten so close, traveled across seas to meet my Lord here (still significant for me as a life-long Catholic), and abandoning hope was what the Shaitan had wanted. Later that day, I prayed inside the Al-Aqsa mosque and the Dome of the Rock. And it was the most beautiful place I'd ever seen.

So yeah, long interfaith story but- divine experiences aren't always supernatural. For me, it was a crisis of faith fought through that was divine. Choosing hope and love, always in the face of despair.

[passable-talent]

Hey! I know you have done a lot of these but could you do a Zuko x Reader body appreciation fluffy/angsty thing? One where the s/o is naturally very sympathetic and forgiving and is one of the first members of Team Avatar to trust Zuko. And then when he is just sulking about his scar and his past and then the s/o swoops in and basically holds him and just stays like that for awhile while telling him everything good about him. I’m rewatching the series and honestly thats all I wanna do rn. Tysm❤️

good god isn’t that the mood... what we all feel when zuko exists, isn’t it? I’m soft

three posts?? in two days?? imagine

Ever since Aang told you about Zuko’s meltdown outside of the North Pole, you figured something very deep and very sad was going on underneath Zuko’s skin. There was something much more to him than he let on- and you figured it had to do with his banishment. You didn’t know much, as word of such things didn’t travel far outside of the fire nation, but you could guess.

His father would’ve had to have been the one to banish him. And he was young, your age, sixteen- how young had he been when his father cast him out? You couldn’t imagine.

And yes, Katara hated him, and you knew she had reason, but you hadn’t been around as long, you simply didn’t understand. But what you could understand was a sad and mistreated boy, and you felt for him, even as you fought against him.

But when things changed, and he turned to team avatar, you knew you had to do something. You wanted to learn more, to understand, because you couldn’t help but think that all of his anger was merely sadness hidden under a mask. You wanted to learn more, and to help, because he was your teammate now. You had always felt for him, and even more so now, with his full, if stunted, range of emotions bared to you.

You often took walks around the western air temple, late at night. As an earth kingdom native, the stone of the temple was home to you, and you loved the silence only broken by the padding of your bare feet.

And, by the sound of tears.

Your heart hurt for whoever was kept awake this late by their pain, and you began to follow the sound, though you had a sneaking suspicion who it was.

You rounded a corner inside the temple and found the room a little bit away from the rest of team avatar where Zuko had put himself up. Having not noticed you yet, he continued to stare into a puddle on the floor and shake, his knees pulled up as he sat on the floor.

Your heart nearly broke for him.

“Hey,” you whispered from the door, trying not to startle him. He looked up and quickly wiped away his tears, as though you hadn’t noticed, casting his gaze anywhere but you. You gave a small smile and walked into the room, sitting beside him, almost close enough to tough. You purposefully but subtly let your knee droop to the side, hiding the puddle from his vision. He hadn’t said a word, and you knew that starting a conversation would need to be a delicate process.

“I knew there was more to you,” you said, as though confirming a theory. It made him look at you, his good eye’s puffiness hiding in the dim light.

“What do you mean?” He asked, and you smiled, not giving him the burden of eye contact as you gazed off toward the wall.

“All those times you were chasing after Aang. Everything they’ve told me about you, from before. I knew there was something more than anger keeping you going.” He turned his face from you, and the both of you gazed off into the middle distance, side by side.

“There wasn’t, back then,” he said, a curt breath leaving his lungs.

“Yes, even then,” you corrected, “but I can’t figure out what. It was more than a drive to capture the avatar for the-“ you straightened your back and puffed out your chest, making fun of the statement you were about to make. “-victory of the glorious fire nation.” Another puff of air left his lungs, and you assumed it was the closest you were going to get to a laugh.

“Got any theories?” He asked, and you shrugged.

“Something about your banishment. You must’ve been young, huh?” You said, this time turning your eyes to him. He stared straight forward.

“Thirteen.” You shook your head, turning your eyes away.

“Wow.” For a moment, all you could hear was the cricket-flies out the window.

“That must be it, then,” you said, as though you’d solved the case. “Cast out by your father, at such a young age. I bet you thought that if you got the avatar back, your father would accept you home.”

“He was never going to accept me.”

“He doesn’t deserve to,” was your quick response, and he turned to you in shock. You continued.

“You’ve betrayed your father to come to us, and it was the right thing to do. You put the future of your nation and the world over your desire to win back his affection.” You finally made eye contact with him, a small smile on your face. “You know, I grew up in a small village in Abbey, one of the first that the fire nation took in the war. We were policed, and militarized, and poor.” His gaze faltered, and you could tell he felt guilty. “And though the fire nation controlled our education and filled it with propaganda, our parents taught us the truth- and often taught us to blindly hate the fire nation.” You reached out to take his hand. “You- you’re the first fire nation member I’ve ever met that I can’t find a fault in. All of those soldiers and teachers, they had malice in their hearts, but you’re doing what’s right for your people.” You brought his gaze back to yours with your free hand, gently. “You give me hope for the future of the fire nation.” He kept his gaze to yours for a moment before closing his eyes, breathing out. With the breath he let go of the last of the tension in his stomach.

“I hope I’m worthy of that,” he said quietly, and you felt a smile quirk at the edge of your lips.

“You are.” As that conversation seemed to dwindle away, you let him sit in silence for a moment, expecting to restart him talking on some other topic. However, he took up the conversation of his own accord.

“You were almost completely correct,” he said, opening his eyes again, but keeping them downcast. “For a long time, it was completely about regaining my father’s love. But that wasn’t all of it.” You tilted your head and squeezed his hand briefly, hoping to spur him on without words. He looked up, his golden eyes meeting yours with strength you hadn’t seen before, and he took his free hand up to point at his scar. “On the day of my banishment, my father did this to me. So every day, as it hurt, i was reminded of my father’s scorn. And every day more that I see it, I remember that my father thought I was such a bad option as an heir to the throne that he would marr my face. My face, of all places- no one can look at me without seeing the mark of a fire lord who said ‘this one isn’t good enough’.” As soon as he finished talking you leaned forward and hugged him, tightly, your cheek resting on his shoulder.

“You don’t deserve that,” you whispered, an intangible sadness gnawing at your heart. He was so abused- it was horrible. His silence was all you got in return but slowly his arms came around you, and you readjusted until it wasn’t so much that you had lept forward but now it was like you’d pulled him into you. “I’m so sorry.” He didn’t answer, merely nodded, his hair moving past your ear. Slowly you parted and reached up to softly touch his scar, fingers hovering just away from the rough skin to give him time to pull away. When he didn’t, you laid your hand down softly, your pinkie finger lining up with his jaw line. “It doesn’t take away from your handsomeness, you know,” you whispered, bravely. His cheek warmed up under your touch, though he didn’t say a word back. You smiled, and let your eyes drift from his golden gaze down to his lips.

His touch was warmer than yours. You had to assume it was the fire within his veins- or maybe that within his heart. Either way, afterward, when his lips pulled away and all you had were his hands on your lower back, the night air made you shiver.

-🦌 Roe

[akudama-drive-incorrect-quotes]

Akudama Drive Character Opinions/Thoughts Pt. 1

Yay!! I finally finished Akudama Drive today! I’m so so sorry for not posting recently, I’ve been very busy with the holidays and semester exams. But at last, I finally sat down and binged from about episode 6 through to the end, and OH. MY. GOD. I have so many thoughts and emotions running through my head!! 

So today I thought I would give a very honest review/my opinions for EVERY character in Akudama Drive just for the heck of it and to help cope with the sadness of the show being over.  Thanks for sticking with me! <3 

So obviously, this will be spoiler heavy, but I assume that everyone reading knows that. xD Okay! This’ll probably be long and really long winded, but off we go! 

Swindler: Oh gosh. Where do I even begin with her?? Swindler’s character was so intriguing to me from the get go, what with us not knowing much about her (and even in the end still not knowing much about her past). I was pretty neutral towards her in the beginning, but MAN. After that scene where she killed those two guys protecting Sister. MAD Respect. I think that that marked a turning point for me liking her. I found her a bit much at times when she didn’t seem to show extreme emotions at the deaths of Hacker, Hoodlum, etc. But I obviously know that she was wrapped up into all this tea by accident and that her actions (While at times potentially suspicious) were completely justified, such as her fears, her desire to protect Brother and Sister, and her confusion as she slowly began her descent into the craziness that was the Kanto-Kansai situation. It was super enjoyable seeing how she grew, and I really wanted her to succeed and be happy. Her death scene made me cry. Also those scenes with Sister and her were so CUTE. <3

Courier: To be completely honest, I didn’t really have any strong emotions towards Courier for the majority of the season. He was frickin badass as all hell, but in terms of the character himself, I thought he was alright. That definitely changed though by the end of the season! We see him deliver a gift to Sister without any fee (Brother’s “dying” wish) and we sympathize with his tragic backstory involving the unnamed woman murdered in his home (mother? Sister?) I loved that addition because we get to see more about the coin itself and why he views it as bad luck. Super neat. I think his interactions with Sister and Swindler are cute, and makes me think of them as sort of like a family. UwU Also his love for Takoyaki/cooking is a pretty fun contrast to his stoic outside. I’m not sure that I ship Courier and Swindler (I can 100% see it though :3). I see them more as two individuals who are bound together by fate (the coin) and have grown to respect one another while learning/surviving in this crazy world. I was definitely sad to see him go, but I’m super happy that I got to love his character a lot more by the end! What a cool guy. His dedication/the way he went above and beyond for Sister and Brother in the end? Perfection. My first pick for a zombie apocalypse team. 

Brawler: He’s wholesome for sure. I’m usually not a big fan of big, tough guys in anime, but he reminds me of the traditional Danganronpa stereotype of the fighter with a warm interior. His interactions with Hoodlum made me like him so much more and appreciate what he brought to the table. I’m sad that he’s not recognized more. He's super badass in his own right and I feel sort of guilty for not realizing it while he was alive. Like cmon girl. It pissed me off the way that the Doctor was treating him after he died (also. That. She killed him. >:O) Like. Is that all you saw him as? I get angry when the POC characters always die first/disrespected by other characters for the sake of “comedy” and whatnot. Like as a POC myself...it’s not cool. But overall, I liked him for who he was. I didn’t care for him too too much, but I definitely wanted him to be happy and enjoyed those sweet moments of excitement he had when fighting, even up to his last moments. 

Hoodlum: He was the one character in Akudama Drive that I was not expecting to like as much as I did. Again, not my favorite, but MAN was he entertaining! I ADORED how much character growth we got from him. I was really rooting for him up until the end (I got super excited when he killed Doctor...and then really sad. CoMe oN) Initially in the first episode, he just seemed to be the classic sort of cowardly idiot, but after he met Brawler you can tell he changed a lot. The dynamic was super fun! Even after Brawler dies, the moments that show Hoodlum coping with his death are amazingly sad, for example, when he says “check this out,” or when he gets angry when no one else seems to care about his death. (SAME Hoodlum. SAME.) The anger and grief that Hoodlum feels is portrayed in an interesting way (he begins to lose himself and submits to Doctor’s manipulation/alternative resources in Kansai). In the end, I’m so happy that he was the one to kill Doctor, because not only was he avenging his friend’s death, but also standing up for himself in a way that he hadn’t done in the series up to that point. Overall. Loved the development of my boi. 

Doctor: This woman. I tell ya got on my nerves. Holy moly. But I should clear things up! At first when she was introduced I thought she was super cool for sure! We s t a n n  a queen to put them boys in their places, but as time went on I started disliking her more and more. Don’t get me wrong, there are parts about her that I think are amazing! For example, I loved her motivations for studying the children (interesting), her poisons/ability to heal were incredibly useful, her voice actor, and sometimes she was just a bad bitch. Like go off queen. But at the same time, I really found her bothersome. I don’t really know when I started to notice it as much, but I just didn’t care for the way that she called Brawler a “Dreadlock Gorilla” ...because like. Um. NO. I also didn’t like how she manipulated Hoodlum (obviously that’s totally in character, but still). As the show went on Doctor just really didn’ vibe with me for some reason. I guess I just didn’t like her as much as the other characters and I know it’s terrible to say, but I was glad when she died. I don’t know what else to say. I stopped liking her. ://

Hacker: Right from the beginning I knew he was my favorite character. <3 I think the aesthetic was super cool and I loved loved the similarities between him and a certain SHSL computer programmer. ;) I appreciated the little moments with him, for example when Cutthroat pushed the emergency buttons on the airbus, the whole “parting-gifts” idea, the drones, etc. His abilities that he brought forth were incredibly useful and without his sacrifice the final mission of rescuing Brother and Sister would’ve been impossible. I LOVED that his role expanded even after he left the group in the early stages (;-;), we can see he was behind the blackout, the hijacking of several systems (including the propaganda videos), and how he was able to play the puppet master by controlling/saving his old teammates. I just think that his abilities to hack and to literally do anything that he pleases was super badass. I feel like out of all of them, Hacker is one of the few that genuinely feels more human (in the sense that he seeks out a new place to call home/excitement, etc.) which I loved. Overall my favorite character...I’m still a little salty about his death and the fact that no one really acknowledged his sacrifice. >:((

Hope you enjoyed that long ramble! Check Out Pt. 2! 💕

[aprito]

hello <3 since i got these asks at the same time i decided to combine my thoughts on them in this post. yet another annoying sjw essay from yours truly on this blog 

before i get into these i think i need to preface why im like. i guess overly hyperfocused on a certain unproblematic base (same age au / platonic canon) for them and avoid the ped0philic content like the plague lol

tw for pedophilia ment, rape ment if that makes you squicky. ALSO THIS IS LONG AND RAMBLY

as i’ve mentioned a couple times already, ive been into the ship since i was 12, back when it was very very common to not only post untagged (nsfw) canonverse content of the two in writing and in drawing but also non con and the like, so you can imagine how bad my first impression online was. thinking back on it ...as a child i found it disturbing but didnt really register how problematic it really was?? (i know, but i also lived in the middle of nowhere and had no one explain this to me) 

skip to 2014 aka me coming back to naruto at 17ish and i had kinda become hyper aware of the fact that there was an increasing amount of people online who had come forward with explaining how fictional problematic content, mostly pedophilia, had been used to groom them into starting relationships with adullts. it was also a time where a lot of people didnt believe these victims, not registering how common it was for minors to be online friends with adults who had no boundaries and no qualms exposing them such content. not gonna get into my personal life here but i was lucky to not having gone through this myself. like... it kinda was my first time truly realising how fiction can EASILY be used to manipulate others irl (and yes i will not argue this, if you dont think fictional media can form and manipulate people’s opinions on attitudes, countries, cultures and virtues, pick up a book about the effects of propaganda media at least once please) 

i, being young, still liking the dynamic but not really the romance, would point this out here and there in the fandom and get into fights with grown adults in their mid 20s who assumed i automatically hated the ship(s) and tried to restrict their freedom of speech or whatever, heard everything from the “age of consent doesnt exist in naruto” to the “sasori looks like a child what does it matter” despite people clearly playing on him being older and experienced. it made me so upset that people were just consuming all this content uncritically and exposing children to it tbh?? not really just sos but a lot of minor/adult ships in naruto in general. and thats where i sat down and thought, i do not want to be a grown adult talking down to children that point out how unsafe the fandom is. theyre absolutely right in drawing these boundaries and calling out adults who defend the uncritical consumption and creation of this content. i do not want to consume or create content that predators could use to groom minors, and i absolutely do want to let younger people in fandom know that i am respecting their comfort zones and want them to have a safe and fun experience. after all, naruto is not an adult show and i think a lot of people forget that!!!! i am not perfect in that regard but its something that i, at the age of 23, am very passionate about and strive towards to.

and i guess thats where same age au was born for me and i have been sticking to it ever since. 

so finally we can move to the first question 

aside from the fact that we both dont like canon sos, i dont think it would work out even if i wasnt prejudiced to it anyways. in all honesty, 35 year old canon sasori is not a redeemable character to me, given the fact that he’s easily amongst the cruelest villains in naruto (torturing and killing and taxiderming people for his own fun personal gain, never for a goal that served anyone but himself. how do you redeem having over 300 corpses in your backpack that you felt absolutely no remorse for killing). sasori was legit one of the only cruel villains that didnt had someone else pull the strings, which sends a clear message on kishi’s part, who absolutely loves to redeem villains LOL.

being that old, he obviously had already been very manifested in what he believed in, even if it was shakey, to the point where the first crack in that world view (sakura and chiyo protecting each other) immediately had him give up on his life all together. that, in my opinion, is not a man who’s going to know what healthy relationships would look like, regardless of it being romantic or not. 35 year old sasori to me has the same appeal as an expired can of tuna and he’s probably very happy 6 feet under. he’s supposed to be a failed gaara in that sense that he had no one to look out for him and therefore was never going to experience anything but a bad ending in life. its fine that hes dead honestly, it wraps up his short character development the best IMO.

adding to that, seriously, sakura was obviously interested in knowing why he was that way, and called him out for being seriously fucked in the head, but it’s weird to me that people assume she had any interest in actively rehabilitating him, let alone starting a serious romantic relationship with him. sakura who’s not only very, uhm, immature and straight forward when it comes to her romantic viewpoints also, as a big bootlicker, wouldnt soil her standing in the village by starting anything with a disgraced and far too gone criminal like sasori. shipping that version of sasori with sakura intimately is still going to set her up for a huge power imbalance that would be difficult to handle imo, even if she was the one in the fight ultimately exerting her power over him. i would still look at it and think damn she deserves better than having to play therapist for man like that lol.

additionally, even if you ignored all of this, you cant really ignore that sasori had already known her as a child, and that had been his first and most impactful impression of her. i dont think that sasori would look at 35 year old sakura and see her as a grown woman and not the little green girl she was in the fight. plus, you easily fall into predatory comparison territory between the “childish” and “womanly” and i have seen way too often in fic just being boiled down to her now being fuckable. a lot of of ships do this and i would just like to remind yall thats it not normal for adults to want to start relationships with children they have seen grown up or known as a child when they themselves were fully grown adults. therefore, maybe if sakura hadnt met sasori before it would be less of a problem? but that also obviously defeats the point of the dynamic and the reason he died in the first place. so yeah, it sounds kind of doomed especially if you were to make it romantic. 

WHICH BRINGS ME TO THE SECOND QUESTION

let me preface this that im not fundamentally against age gaps, even if im not super interested in it. after all, colorblind had a 5 yr age gap (with sakura being 21), even if, say, i wrote similar fics today i probably would make it smaller lol. i think it can be handled well if both parties have enough life experience to deal with it, and the author is cautious of where the age gap starts, i think a 10+ year age gap would be fine in a scenario where the younger party (i guess sakura) was at least 25-27ish, meaning she has completed most of her most formative life stages and probably had been in relationships before, meaning she would be able to handle it without having to fear a huge power imbalance. the older the younger party is the less the age gap is going to matter tbh .TsukiHoshino and AngelOfDeath10 both handle age gaps in their fics really well imo, so i do not mind reading about them.

unfortunately, a lot of people in this fandom think making sakura barely "”””legal””””” (18, not even 20 which is hilarious to me because the source material is obviously japanese) because they both cannot stand her being past her “prime years” of being young fertile and fuckable to much older men as well as thinking a 20 year old is automatically old enough to handle that type of relationship. ive seen a lot of unironic takes that believe it will absolve them of callout posts if they throw around age of consent and “shes 18 now suckers!!!” enough lmfao. absolutely hilarious. aging a minor up without aging the adult down seriously reeks of predatory “cant wait until youre 18″ narratives and thats why i find it similarly disturbing as straight up pedo shipping.

ultimately, sasosaku is and will always be a inherently problematic ship in canon, which is why i think it should always be handled a little more responsibly in fandom spaces, ignoring or outright excusing the main problem factor, which is sasori, isnt going to convince anyone that the dynamic in itself is well written and interesting enough to explore in aus, like giving sasori the redemption most of us wanted him to have by aging him down to a point in time where he was still realistically going to allow being positively influenced, similar to gaara. 

so really, what i think is well handled age gap and how most people handle age gap in the naruto fandom are two different worlds at times lol 

tl;dr

canon shippers have never been anything but gross when i was younger and i didnt wanna be like that, even if youre “smart”enough to differenate, actual creeps dont really care and might use your content to blur the lines, sasori isnt rly redeemable so romantic canonverse realistically wouldnt make much sense and is still iffy, age gaps are fine if they are handled well, but given that the dynamic doesnt really need the age gap to still work im not that invested on making that an essential part of my shipping experience.  

thank you for reading and hope this makes sense!

[c0mmon-curtesy]

Was tagged by @gnarrwhals a little bit ago but here’s some info about me 🤓

Name: Brandon

Pronouns: he/him

Zodiac: Sun Sagittarius and Moon Capricorn

Height: 5’8

Time: 12:30pm, I need more sleep 💤

Birthday: December 11th

Nationality: American, certainly not proud of it

Favorite bands/groups: A Day To Remember, Blink-182, Neck Deep, The Story So Far, Movements, The Wonder Years, Knuckle Puck, Angels & Airwaves, Citizen and Tigers Jaw. Really digging Belmont as of recent.

When your blog was made: this one was made in 2018, my super old one back in 2014. Made this current one after one of the worst years of my life to vent and hopefully meet new people. Have since made lots of great friends and even met a few irl. If ur reading this when we hanging irl loser

Why you chose your URL: i love everything about the Common Courtesy album from ADTR, and having common courtesy as a person is something I value in myself and in others.

Last show you binged: oh boy I haven’t actually watched Netflix in a bit but I binged The Queen’s Gambit pretty hard.

Following count: 471

Follower count: 1665, didn’t expect so much growth when I first made it tbh. Thanks everyone for sticking around throughout the horny posts and politics lmao

Average sleep hours: 6 💤

Other blogs: none. This my only blog. Old blog was courtesy-isnt-common so shoutouts if you somehow knew me in 2014

Last thing you googled: I was googling a bunch about the Israel and Palestine situation. Basically Israel is committing actual terrorism against Palestinians. Imagine if someone came inside your home and sat in your living room and said “this house is mine now” if you retaliate the Israelis military (IDF) will literally kill you. This is barely covering the topic but If you wanna know more do some research and as always question the sources. Propaganda and downplay in full swing.

Lucky Number: 24

Currently wearing: ADTR grey sweatpants and oversized dragon t-shirt woo

Instrument: learning guitar v slowly and I used to know a lot on piano. I used to play a lot of Mayday Parade but can’t remember anymore, could probably pick it back up easily though! I can also play Mad World by Gary Jules and many other songs but only partially. Last I tried learning was Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright, the one from Shrek. I got pretty far but some of the later shit is hard and I do mostly by ear ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Dream trip: anywhere my long distance tumblr friends are at 🥺 so the UK and various states across the US.

Favorite food: I love Mexican food! So many options and flexibility with multiple diets too if you’re vegetarian or vegan. Also shoutouts to pizza 🍕

Top 3 fictional universes: The Elder Scrolls, Bloodborne, and Divinity Original Sin. Those are all video games but I love the worlds and universes in those games.

Idk who to tag tbh, if you actually read all of this I think u should do your own and tag me so I can see what ur all about ❤️

[iamtotallycool]

Loved in All forms

Good lord, you want to talk about an Eleteo drabble that has been collecting dust!!

I wanted to post this one during maybe the 2018? 2019? Eleteo week when I had committed to doing ALL Au's for that week.

This one was about the Los Cuatro Amigos having different body types than their show counterparts: Elena's plus size, Mateo's rail thin and EXTREMELY tall, Gabe's husky, and Naomi's more overtly muscular.

Anyways, just a fun little drabble I finally found and finished. Enjoy!

“Ouch!” Mateo exclaimed as he hit his head on the doorway out of the beachside villa, almost dropping the tray of Agua fresca he had been carrying.

“Careful with the drinks, Cabana boy!” Gabe called out from the rock him and the girls were lounging on, the afternoon sun warming up their damp, chilled skin and swimsuits.

“I think I was looking more of a ‘thank you,’ Mateo retorted as he set the tray down on the rock. He had only wanted to get a cup of himself, but, one can’t ever just get a drink for themselves when you have friends.

“Hey Mateo, how's the weather up there?” Elena said in a cheeky tone, bumping her large, curvy hip against his bony one, well, she tried to anyway since she barely came up to his shoulders.

“Elena…” Mateo groaned. He loved a good pun, but she could be a bit more original.

“What? I couldn’t hear you from all the way up there!” Elena shot back, giggling at her own bad joke.

“And now break time is officially over, since Elena ruined it,” Naomi said as she jumped off the rock and grabbed their olaball.

“Count me in,” Gabe said as he followed behind her.

“Spoil sports!” Elena jeered. She then turned up to look at Mateo with a small pout on her lips. “I’m hilarious.”

“I know you are,” Mateo said as he took a large gulp of his drink and heavily plopped down into the sand right at the water's edge. Once he completely drained his drink, he crossed his long legs and hunched over his tall frame.

Naomi had had the bright idea of trying out Water Olaball, which sounded fun at first, but after 10 minutes of tripping in the water and splashing hard, his muscles felt like jello while Gabe’s barrel chest and husky frame, and not to mention Naomi having abs on top of abs made them have a superhuman level of stamina.

“Mind if I sit with you?” Elena then asked as she now stood over him, surprising him since he was sure she would have gone back into the water too.

“Over course,” Mateo said as he unfolded so he could scooch over slightly to make room for her.

Elena just smirked at her boyfriend though, and instead sat right on his lap.

“This spot looks comfy,” Elena said as she curled herself against him, wiggling her extremely soft hips for extra emphasis.

“If you say so,” Mateo said as he felt a blush creeping up the back of his neck.

“Careful not to break Mateo in half, Elena!” Gabe yelled to the couple. His tone was full of friendly comradery and not a hint of malice, but Mateo couldn't help but flinch slightly.

“You know he didn’t mean anything bad,” Elena instantly said in a comforting tone.

“No, I know, just...a force of habit sometimes,” Mateo said as his eyes drifted to his arms. Remembering the days of when he would agonize of what was the point of having height if you had no muscle mass behind it, so you stood out as an almost 6’4 tree than anything else. Which was further reinforced on a daily basis by comments made by schoolmates and the older Senoritas of the neighborhood.

Mateo put a hand on her shoulder. “You’re not bothered by what he said, are you?”

“From Gabe? No.” Elena pulled up the neckline of her swimsuit to cover up some of her cleavage and light stretch marks that sat on top of them, “From others...sometimes.”

Mateo’s eyebrows scrunched together. “I’m surprised anybody would ever say anything like that to you. You know, with being Crown Princess and all.”

“Of course they have,” Elena scoffed, wrapping her arms around her knees. “I've heard them all: You're surprisingly athletic despite how you look, are you sure you want that dress, it will require a lot of...alterations, or even, you'll have to send us your portrait since there's no way all of you can fit in a miniature.”

Mateo grimaced. “Yikes.”

“Yeah, tell me about it,” Elena replied in a more solemn tone.

Mateo bit his lip, he hadn’t meant to bring down the mood or make her feel bad. He couldn’t stand when Elena felt sad.

“You know, I remember the first time I saw a portrait of you.”

“Oh really?” Elena said with an arched brow.

“Yep,” Mateo nodded. “My mami had some been able to keep and preserve the portraits my grandfather had of all of the royal family, and even used it as propaganda for people who were forgetting the old Avalor or never had a chance to see it.”

Elena smiled. “That sounds like Rafa.”

“After I had lost my father, I was in a pretty bad place, I didn’t think there was any hope of life getting any better,” Mateo swallowed hard, trying to keep the horrible memory down. “So my mom started getting more serious with the stories she had told me. She also taught me old dances, turned a blind eye, I guess, when I found my grandfather’s workshop, and finally showed me your portraits.”

Mateo’s own smile stretched across his lips as he leaned back on his hands to happily let himself get lost in this memory.

“I finally had a face to the girl who had danced in Town Square with the common folk, and practiced sword fighting with the Queen in the grand ballroom, and who had sacrificed herself in order to save the rest of her family and castle staff. And she was the most incredible girl I have ever seen in my whole life.”

Mateo felt another rush of embarrassment as he looked to see Elena staring at him with wide eyes and slightly parted lips. He awkwardly coughed and was about to brush past it when Elena grabbed the sides of his face, squishing his cheeks slightly, before crushing a kiss to his lips.

“You are incredible,” Elena purred in his ear, fingers trailing down his bony spine. “You are beautiful, and kind, and smart, and I couldn’t imagine my life without you.” Elena had been placing kisses on his face with each thing she listed off.

They met together this time for this kiss, which was much softer but somehow made his body feel like it was burning and drowning at the same time. For once, he didn’t feel self conscious about his stick arms as he wrapped them around her gorgeous plus size frame.

There was so much of her to feel, and kiss, and --

Mateo and Elena screeched as a large wave of sea washed over them.

The two teens looked over to see Gabe and Naomi cackling, not even trying to hide they were caught red handed.

“Sorry, you two looked like you could use some cooling down!” Naomi exclaimed, holding her sides from laughing so hard.

“That’s it!” Elena declared as she jumped to her feet and held out a hand to him. “This calls for a rematch, in which Mateo and I will thoroughly kick your butts in!”

With the sun backlighting her, she looked ten times better than her portrait. She was real and vibrant and fiery yet warm.

So, Mateo happily clasped her hand with a smirk on his face as he was yanked up to his feet rather easily by her strength, and once again towered over her.

He kept his body and head held up high as they ran into the water, hand in hand, ready to show that they weren’t only a great dream team when it came to magic.

[hange-zone]

hey...i’ve sat with the ending for a bit and am still not entirely sure what to feel. i will say i’m bit sad that it’s over - i started this series with friends back in 2014, and was little and giddy and excited about it. i consumed a lot of jeanmarco fic (wisteria! LAD! render! strings! etc) and that one really good eremin (we were kings...which is probably half the reason why i’m writing it so feverishly now) + fanart (johannathemad! icarus theory! gimmes! many many more that i’m happy to share but don’t remember right now cos it’s 5am)

and then life went on and i forgot about it mostly because...life...and only got back into it a few months ago when the anime was back on netflix and i watched most of it in the span of a week. and i’m here, again.

i have to admit i don’t exactly read the manga and i stopped the anime for a bit because at the heart of it i’m also not sure how to feel about the time skip. i think that’s on me though - the basement was built up to be this black box and i think a large part of the fun was the not knowing, and the journey to the basement was used as a framing device. so once we found out that fell away and i don’t think any reveal would have been completely satisfactory. and i have issues with the timeskip but it’s probably me being picky (lol dm me if you’d like to know more, i am such a rambler)

though admittedly there are parts of the post timeskip i do enjoy - you can tell i’m obsessed with that one scene eren and armin stare at each other, i love the new designs, i especially love armin lol - and I appreciate parts of the perspective it’s trying to give too in the broadest sense (ie the anti-war themes...effect of propaganda... at least I THINK that’s what we were supposed to take away at the start of season 4 because I stopped watching the show then for a whole host of reasons)

was looking over (ok, glued to) reddit yesterday and it occured to me parts of the fandom (read: r/yeagerbomb) can be quite toxic (as with any large fandom I guess!) so I was hoping to avoid that but also like understand what’s going on...i think honestly i was a bit disappointed in the ending, at first i was actually upset but now i’m just...alright. mostly i think i’m sad it’s ended and that’s mixed up with how I feel in general. but I've thought about it and overall it’s an  ending in the broadest sense, I mean it largely served its purpose and I think importantly for endings, tied up main threads of the plot. and i respect the decisions the author has made, even as we’re all entitled to our opinion and you can disagree. I do wish some other choices made or it were done slightly differently. mostly I wish it had more time to develop some themes and I think generally some parts of the series were a bit convoluted. 

if you’d like my (uninformed) thoughts i am happy to share - they’re in more detail below! and i’d like to hear yours too:)

.

.

.

if it helps i didn’t buy the whole ‘chad eren’ thing at all - at heart he is still a nineteen year old boy and he’s probably still small and scared - something which i’ve explored! - and while i appreciate that eremika didn’t exactly come out of nowhere i’ve always read it as them wanting the domesticity with each other, wanting to live out full, normal lives, but not necessarily just about the exclusivity of a relationship, which is what some readings of the last chapter seemed to suggest (& hence i kinda get why people are so mad that that he comes off as an incel but idk, maybe it’s the translations? i personally am choosing to read it as the first part - that he wanted deep down to have the space to live out a long, natural life with the people he loves).

but wrt to eremika my main thing is that i’m a bit iffy on the parallels to ymir because personally i’m not a bit fan of that entire ymir/fritz thread...1) i get the slave...to love but it also feels a bit like it romanticises their relationship? maybe i’m reading too much into it. but more importantly to me 2) i feel it complicates things a bit because we can’t then pin down if it’s eren or her making the executive decisions which then becomes a bit more thematically murky and doesn’t help with characterisation...I mean if he’s a plot device then he is a plot device, if he’s a character with agency then he’s a character, if he blurs the line between both it becomes a bit of an issue as there aren’t real stakes and character development then becomes a bit of a question mark since there’s also this tendency to reduce him to a symbol...and yeah, as we see the whole  headache-inducing nature of this is quite evident now... (and i want to feel for eren!)

also not a super fan of the eren sending dina. but i’m reminded of the discussions around mr robot and standing in the stream of time wrt white rose but eh, time travel plots are always a bit inscrutable and honestly always make things difficult. personally i rationalise it as more of he sent them away from Bert than to his mother. maybe he had the vague understanding of what it’d do but exactly why he did it was different, which idk, makes all the difference to me. 

but i do appreciate what the ending was trying to show, even if I personally don't think it was the best, i do appreciate eren’s vulnerability, his last talk with armin broke me, and appreciate that jean is okay, levi is okay, and he got to see everyone else again. i’m also kinda appreciative of the bird symbolism though i don’t think it’s any more than that...also it makes me think that poor eren, he’s burdened with Glorious Purpose & like it’s not gonna stop until he’s dead, right :/ also was under no illusions that it was gonna be a happy ending and everyone would be satisfied somehow or another so eh. I do wish that some things were done differently, I would have done some things differently, but also I acknowledge the constraints of the medium and I think some nuances didn't come across/writing could be tighter. maybe we’ll see when the anime comes out, if some of us stick around that long.

also my monkey brain is choosing to fixate on little, abstract things like oh, armin looks so cute with his hair slicked back...so kudos for that and maybe there’s some hamfisted thing about telling the story...giving it meaning...like horatio? maybe? lol goodnight sweet prince eren...i AM overthinking it probably. anyway if you think about it, it’s the death of the author (ie Barthes) and meaning is created not just when it’s encoded in the text, but when we read and experience it -- which gives us some leeway as to how we interpret the whole series, if you’d really like. so this is my outlook:”)

ok this has turned out longer than i expected and is undercut by actually a lot of salt ahh and i actually have a whole sort of treatise on it! but i think i am a bit emotionally exhausted because i always care too much so i think i'll take a break before I get back to prompts, sorry...

anyway what i mean to say is if you made it this far thank you & that i’m interested to hear what people think! so come send in the ask or reply to this - and feel free to disagree etc but let’s be peaceable about it:)