#atsv funny

[dxndxrxvxbe]

Miguel beefing w miles for no reason be like

[aficionadoenthusiast]

at this point i could recognize miguel o'hara by the ass

[brown-spider]

Hey remember how Noir is an anti-fascist from 1933

[saydada]

they’re gonna trip at some point

+closeups!

[pbnmj]

i just KNOW they have beef (alt panel i scrapped under the cut)

[freshavacado7]

Spider animals >>>>

[spoopdeedoop]

eddie is this guy on tiktok that is notorious for having both a ridiculously accurate hobie impression and for having the most unhinged tiktok live comments so. it had to be done

(edit: there's more now. parts two and three here)

[moralesluvr]

imagine sitting down at a restaurant with miguel & the couple that’s seated in the booth a few spaces away from y’all starts arguing and you both can hear what they’re saying…and it’s all stuff that shouldn’t be said out loud. n y’all r just sitting there trying not to laugh 😭😭😭

nah because i KNOW miguel is so goofy like this.

you were seated in a diner together for breakfast, finally enjoying your day off together as you both picked the menu apart, when you heard bickering.

not just normal arguing, literal bickering from the other side of the old-timey restaurant. miguel completely turned around to eavesdrop, and you slapped his hand, “babe! that’s none of our business, you’re making it obvious that you’re listening!”

he didn’t say anything, he just shushed you and motioned for you to come sit by him. you rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t even pretend you weren’t interested too, so you snuck out of your side of the booth and sat on his lap as you eavesdropped on the two women who were talking a little too loud.

“how dare you invite me here, acting like you haven’t been having sex with my husband for months!”

the other woman snorted, “oh please, elizabeth, your husband had been cheating for a long, long time and you never knew! ask the other girls back at the country club, where do you think he goes every weekend? to the lake house like he says? baby, he sold that lake house and blew it on call girls.”

“you’re lying! at least me and my husband don’t have to wear protection because one of you has an STD!”

miguel immediately craned his neck over to you, whispering, “the hell?”

you contained a laugh as the women just kept going, until one of them stood up, a fork positioned in her hand like she was going to hurt the other woman with it. “i’ll kill you!”

“oh hell no.” you snorted, grabbing your husband’s hand as you started to stand up,

“we’re leaving.”

[tarjapearce]

Lips anon! Had a tasty thought, imagine Ranchero Miguel and the Pastor's Daughter 😳

You are supposed be a sweet little cherry and you are, but behind barn doors you're getting bred by Miguel. You truly love each other, and you're ashamed of your lust, but he assures you that he's going to marry you. It's no lie. He's just going to pump a baby into you first ❤️

Jeeeesshhh. 🤤

VERY NSFW under the cut

More Ranchero Miguel here

----

When Miguel had arrived to your family's farm as a recommendation by a close friend of your dad, you couldn't believe how... easy it was to sin.

Your mother would often swat your head and reprimand you whenever your stare, lingered too much on him. Saying "No daughter of mine will be mingling with that boy." But you didn't care.

Not when he had popped your cherry in the barn. Strong and calloused hands had held you in place as his fat cock slid into you, condom wrapped a bit too tight around him. Riding you gently as he mumbled the sweetest things into your ear. He made sure to make it special.

Sometimes he'd tease you by working shirtless in the barn, he'd ride Agustín, A pure bred horse, hat snug on his head. Your friends would unabashedly stare at him.

"Señoritas" (Ladies)

He tipped his hat but you knew that smile on his face belonged to you only, your friends giggling and gushing over the fact you had such fine man, under your care.

You felt shame washing over you at the breathless petitions you made him.

"Use the rope!" He would. He would tie your hands above you in one of the posts as his girth rammed viciously into your tight and soaking pussy, only to leave it swollen, full of him and flushed by the constant slapping of his toned hips.

"Choke me" He'd squeeze his large hand that easily wrapped on your neck, cutting the air enough to pump his load inside a couple of times inside your greedy cunt.

"Dios mío, preciosa" He growled as you milked and squeezed him. He could feel every pulsation of your insides embracing him, trapping him.

But this time he was being particularly rough on you. The frustration of you not being swollen with his baby at this point made him to rile your legs up to his shoulders, spreading you, as his fat, cum leaking, thick cock sheathed on your pussy-sleeve

He covered your mouth as your hands fisted in tight balls on his chest, tears prickling at the corner of your eyes.

"No hagas mucho..." He growled as his hips smacked yours with such force it sent you bouncing underneath him, "Ruido" (Don't make too much noise)

Your mewls and grunts died on your mouth as he fucked you thoroughly.

"Te vas a ver tan chula con esta pancita redonda" (You'll look gorgeous with this round belly)

God, the thrill to have him all to yourself doing as you asked, only to be pampered later with such delicacy made your stomach flutter. Your mother would surely die out of a heart attack if she knew you were letting the farmboy she disliked so much, fill your little tight hole to the brim as many times as he saw fit. And your father, would surely want to shoot him for corrupting you.

"Ya quiero casarme contigo, chaparrita" (I already wanna marry you, baby)

Tears rolled down your cheeks as he didn't show any signs of stopping, at least not anytime soon. Pleasure borderline biting and overwhelming. In reality was, That Miguel only obliged at your wishes just to see your pretty, dolled up eyes rolling to the back for him and he alone.

"Pa' llenarte de hijos preciosos. Sólo mírate" (T'fill you with pretty children. Just look at you)

"So pretty and good f'me, yeah?" you nodded and your spine arched.

He was definitely fucking a baby into you tonight.

[ajtheweirdo]

Little guy

[aficionadoenthusiast]

[cubedmango]

indian blorbos obtained u know what that means [hits them w desi memes lazer]

[aro-iceland]

this has been on my mind since i first saw these screenshots and i finally caved in and made the edits

[pandadrake]

He’s not funny because his jokes suck.

Dedicated to that deleted scene from ATSV where he actually tries to quip and Jess nearly dies of cringe.

[shu-of-the-wind]

peter b spent the entirety of across the spiderverse being like "listen you know what cured my depression? my MAGIC BABY"

[brown-spider]

imo the pointing meme was 1,000x’s funnier in ITSV than in ATSV