#autism isn’t linear

[killrisma]

Change is fucking terrifying! Things will be different.

No matter how hard you try, you will NEVER be able to stop it.

Every day that passes changes you, you’re never the same as yesterday, hell the entire universe is never the same as yesterday.

There’s only today, this hour, this minute, this second. Because when you wake up tomorrow you’ll be different than you are right now.

Nothing will ever be the same as right now.

Change is fucking terrifying, but damn is it exciting!

[august-racoone]

i feel like the magnus archives fandom has been doing alignments with entities all wrong

everyone keeps trying to align themselves or others with only one entity, when even in the show they mention its not that neat. nothing is simply one entity and to fit something/someone into only one entity is ill fitting.

i think assigning entities is like the autism spectrum. its not a linear spectrum but more of a pie chart. people/things can be aligned with more than one (tho maybe leaning towards a certain entity more). and it isn’t like the entities you align with have to have anything to do with each other, rather, it has to do with you, and your fears, and your experiences.

as much as i would like to make entities the new zodiac signs, i dont think that is how that works.

[showtimeatfreddys]

ITS AUTISM ACCEPTANCE MONTH BITCHES

HAPPY AUTISM ACCEPTANCE MONTH TO ALL MY FELLOW AUTISTIC PEEPS!!!! I plan on making some art work for this month, but idk when it’ll be done, so hang tight.

To celebrate this wonderful month here’s some educational fun facts!

(1) While the puzzle piece is the most common symbol for autism, it is actually preferred by the community to use a rainbow or golden infinity sign, due to the ableist history of the puzzle piece. Namely, it was popularized by Autism Speaks, which is an ableist company whose views are extremely harmful to the community (I won’t get into it here, but it’s BAD)

(2) The Autism spectrum isn’t linear. There isn’t a “more” or “less” autistic, as there are so many facets to autism that vary person to person. The spectrum is more like a color wheel, with each color representing a different trait (eg, sensory, social, memory, motor, etc). The idea that there is a linear spectrum is mostly based on the “how well can you mask your traits so they don’t affect other people” mindset. (One person may struggle more with motor but not social, while another struggles with sensory but not motor, etc)

(3) AFAB people are frequently under/misdiagnosed. Because their traits present differently from boys (who were the only people studied in most autism studies, especially the ones that made the diagnostic criteria) their traits are often missed. Oftentimes, they are diagnosed with ADHD, OCD, AVPD, anxiety, or even eating disorders, and have to self advocate for a diagnosis to be pursued. I myself wasn’t diagnosed until I was a teenager (after over a year of personal research and self advocacy) while my brother was diagnosed at 5.

That’s all for now! Happy Autism Acceptance Month and have a great day!

[badbatchenthusiast]

a little realisation i came to today, about living with and coming to terms with having a hidden disability, especially neurodiversity, trauma and/or mental illness:

for the last six months, i have struggled quite a lot. it’s a high-stress time in my life where everything i do counts towards major life decisions, and the main message i’m hearing from the people around me is that i need to give it my all, work as hard as possible, or i’ll regret the opportunities i’ve missed.

needless to say, i haven’t been sleeping particularly well. i’ll go to lessons and then work a 4 hour shift on two, maybe three hours sleep. i’ve been so anxious that knowing i believe i’ll be exhausted the next morning no matter how much i sleep, and the 9hrs i’m set to get by sleeping early won’t be enough still (because life is inherently overwhelming and overstimulating as an autistic person). this makes me stressed about how i’m not sleeping until it’s five in the morning and i can finally relax enough to doze. everything is being impacted; my attendance has been slipping, my tutor is involved. it’s felt like i’ve been getting worse and not better, like life is going to continue going downhill until things i used to find easy — falling asleep, organising my own schedule, keeping my studies balanced with work and a social life — are things i’m finding almost impossible and are taking great effort to maintain at a reasonable standard.

but here’s the thing.

i’m not getting worse.

it feels like i am, because new problems are arising that weren’t there before, but someone i owe a lot to pointed out today that a year or two ago, i would not have been able to express myself. they wouldn’t register as problem areas, i’d just push myself into collapse. i would’ve worked myself into a meltdown instead of walking to the support office and informing them i needed to go home, would’ve been in verbal shutdown or unresponsive or having a panic attack instead of being able to stim and breathe through the overwhelm. today i made a calculated decision, of leaving early instead of sticking out for the rest of the day and probably exhausting myself enough to not be in tomorrow or the day after. and that’s huge.

my autism isn’t ‘improving’ despite me having less of the massive meltdowns or shutdowns that got me diagnosed in the first place. i’m probably more visibly autistic than i’ve ever been. my anxiety hasn’t lessened despite no longer having regular panic attacks.

but i’m catching it earlier. i can identify what’s going on with me before it becomes a crisis, and i’m starting to have the skills to run interventions.

when people say progress isn’t linear, i think this is part of it. i’m not getting worse, i can just see the problem now and put a name to it. the analogy that came to mind was a building, which before i could only tell was fragile when it caved in, is now having the work put it to rebuild properly. but before you can have a nice foundation and solid walls there’ll be a lot of looking around, and realising the concrete is cracked to shit and nothing is reinforced and those spots you never paid attention to are in fact black mould which are eating at your walls. and these are realisations i was not having before because i didn’t know, i didn’t have the tools or the understanding to make sense of it.

my floors are no longer collapsing on me at random. it’s instead a constant series of little things, because i can tell when a pipes burst and deal with it before it floods everything and rots the floors. but this awareness brings with it the feeling that something is wrong all the time. that there are constant little fires to snuff — that things are getting worse, not better. that yes i know how to stop a broken pipe from leaking now but it doesn’t change the situation, which is that the entire system needs swapping out for less rusting parts. it’s easy to get lost in all of this and forget that actually, before, this would’ve been a build up to a crisis and now it’s something i can deal with before it snowballs.

learning to cope and accommodate myself after being told my entire life that i am going to be impressive, that i’m capable of being high achieving in anything i put my mind to, has been rough. i was never going to succeed at the life other people talked about for me; i’m simply not able to work that hard without hurting myself, and honestly i think few people are even without a disability. i don’t want to live life for other people, i want to build something im proud of, for me, designed to make me feel good and comfortable and succeed in a way that makes sense for my ambitions and needs. and both are important; success isn’t out of the picture, i just need to rethink it so it includes being happy and coping with what i find difficult. i won’t lie, it has been a process of mourning someone who never existed, who i never could’ve been. i still resent sometimes the fact that i can’t go back to masking so much no one notices my symptoms.

but i’m improving. steadily and tangibly. it takes work, and at some point it’ll definitely feel like leaving the unstable building in place was preferable to the deconstruction because recreating it all with a healthy and sturdy foundation seems impossible, but it just takes time. you replace one brick at a time.

it gets better, i promise, even if it’s hard to believe. any step forward is progress, no matter how small, until you look back and realise you’ve come an unimaginably long way forward.

[dallonwrites]

okay so one thing i wanted this year was to handwrite more, just because i like the idea of having physical copies of my writing like that rather than tucked into a computer doc, and i specifically have a Lover Boy Notebook. the goal isn’t to commit to handwriting the draft (typically i play with writing a scene in my notes app or laptop, which i call freewriting, and use that to handwrite a more “official” draft of that scene) but just to have a physical, chronological (bc i am NOT a linear writer usually) capsule of the first full draft. the idea is also that the first full draft, rather than being the messy thing you get out of the way so you can polish it into something better, is something special because its messy and new and only just becoming sure of itself, and that’s the part of a story i want to specially preserve like this more than anything.

anyway longwinded explanation aside, I am actually finding it so fun. these are the main benefits i notice (which very much align with my writing process and goals, i know they won’t for others!):

breaks up my writing sessions in a way that my brain processes more easily (sometimes i struggle to know if I’m really “done” for the day which has led to both over and under writing but here it’s just like. okay my arm hurt now)

forces me to write slower because i can’t control my handwriting well and need to be slow to be aware of what i’m doing, whereas on the laptop i can touch type so sometimes i will be writing and just zone out (great for sprints and fast drafts, but neither of those align with my writing goals atm)

^ writing slower has made me feel more immersed in a moment as i write it, especially i think combined with actively writing the words instead of typing keys fast. i’ve found myself immersing deep into images and scenes only to step back and realise that was all just one paragraph. something about it feels more actively engaging than typing a story out, but again i touch type so it’s easy for me to detach from what i’m doing when i do that

OMG THE STORY LITERALLY FEELS ALIVE!!!!!! i can flick through it, i can hear the words against the paper and notebook as i write them, i can feel the words when i run my hand over a page. this is sensory seeking autism heaven for me

[rubyof-thesea]

the autism spectrum isn’t linear! it’s a color wheel & autism is tie dye

[stimpunks]

The Emergent Power of a Web of Notes with Links

Below is a fairly accurate reflection of my writing process and how my blogs start! Takes a while for them to form into a vaguely coherent structure for me to share more widely! Autism isn’t linear, my thought process and way of being is monotropic, multi sensory, neuro-holographic, rhizomatic and omnidirectional. I shared this last year. Follows on nicely… – Helen Autistic Realms |…

[explode-this]

Petition to change the word “disorder” in various “diagnoses” to “type” or “tendency” because yeah I tick all the boxes for “avoidant personality disorder,” but there’s something malignant about the phrase “personality disorder” that feels hopeless, like it’s a permanent thing that can’t be overcome ever at all and you’re just stuck like this with the exception of learning a bunch of skills to pretend to fit in better, and also that’s my problem with diagnostics in the first place, and yes the second D in ADHD stands for “disorder,” but it’s easy to forget that if I’m just referring to it with initials, and I know labels can be helpful for making connections or explaining oneself or finding understanding/help (I feel this way about ADHD and autism) but I would really like, just for one moment, to not feel so completely broken by the way my whole fucking system adapted to child abuse and shaped me into the goblin of an adult I am now, one with a perpetual stomach ache who struggles with existence because the child she was didn’t actually understand what a future was or could be after years of being told she was so useless she should kill herself, and I’ve been feeling better about a lot of stuff lately but these things still exist under the surface and I don’t talk about them a lot here but they’re there, which comes back around to the feeling of permanence in diagnoses, but healing isn’t linear and maybe I’m just having a storm cloud moment today and I should just chill out and eat a sandwich and listen to some rain videos and I’ll be back to a generally optimistic outlook within 3-5 business days, but god, I wish I could tell myself with the same kind of conviction I tell others that you’re fine and you are lovely and have many good qualities and it doesn’t matter how slow you take it, you’re still making things, and it’s okay if you’re not cut out for college or a profession, you matter because you’re a human being and actually believe it for myself the way I do for them.

[lifeisbooksandcats]

Two of my coworkers were talking about our other coworker’s 31 year old autistic son. One coworker said that she doesn’t think he’s “really” autistic because he can talk and knows how to order things online. She said “I don’t think he has real autism, I think he just has a touch of it.”

So I jump in and try to explain that the autism spectrum isn’t linear where it goes from more autistic to less autistic - you’re either autistic or you’re not. You can’t have “just a touch” of autism. Coworkers are looking at me like I’ve got 3 heads and I’m not making sense, so I pull up this image on Google (from autism_sketches on instagram)

and try to explain it again. They said “oh that makes sense” but idk. Idk that it made sense. Idk that they understood. I tried. I tried.

[noodle-shenaniganery]

Okay, so. I’m Confused About This Thing, part [insert big number here]:

I thought that the main point of most of the language reform thing around autism isn’t that the language in use is incorrect, it’s that it’s misleading. (I’m excluding slurs. Those are offensive and considered bad for a different reason.)

Examples include, but aren’t limited to:

“Nonverbal” is misleading because it implies that autistic people who can’t speak have no connections to language as a whole, so “nonspeaking” is preferred.

“Person with autism” is misleading because it implies that autism is something that can be separated from the individual (or cured), so “autistic person” is preferred.

Severity labels are misleading because they imply that autism is a linear spectrum, so it’s preferred to just specify what traits you’re describing (usually things like high support needs, nonspeaking, etc.).

Functioning labels are misleading for a lot of reasons, and have a similar solution to severity labels.

So, the conclusions I reached from this was:

1. Autistic people (who the language applies to) are allowed to use whatever language they feel is best, since they know what being autistic is like.

2. These restrictions on language are mostly meant for people who are not autistic, since they don’t know what being autistic is like.

3. None of the examples given are inherently wrong, they’re just not accurate.

But now I’m hearing that some people think that the language is wrong? And that nobody is allowed to use them? I’m very confused. Asperger’s Syndrome is also apparently in a separate category (and I think mild autism and high functioning, too)? Can someone help explain this?

(If I said anything that’s wrong, hard to understand, ignorant, or that you simply disagree with, please let me know! This also goes for anything important that I may have left out. Oh, and any grammar mistakes I may have made.)

[elliesflower]

What’s your attraction to Abby Anderson? I love asking lesbians this question because they all say different but very wholesome things

you wanna know about my attraction………..to abigail anderson????? okay. buckle in. this may will get ramble-y (the rest will be below the cut bc i have a friend who hasn’t played pt 2 yet)

also, first lemme make it clear this ask is specifically about abby so i'm obviously going to focus on her, but y'all know i love my baby girl el and ngl could probably write 20x this about her because i have much more to go off of (my username is literally ellie's pussy btw.)

so i will not lie to you. my attraction to abby is not exactly….linear. i first got a hold of part 2 a few months after it came out—i had managed to stay spoiler free despite the transphobes/homophobes/misogynists jumping out of the woodwork—and i…fucking loved the story. jury’s still out on which storyline i like better, although; i don’t think i could put one above the other, really.

it was brutal, emotionally. after joel’s death i stopped playing for an entire month. literally was just processing in my down time, vomiting words onto paper to get my thoughts and feelings out and make sense of them. it was…rough. so naturally, i disliked abby. but- i’m also gay asf. so you already know it was conflicting for me (i blame the horny part of my brain). like hello????? big buff lesbian video game woman????????? that is literally exactly my type. but also, i watched her do the unspeakable.

and then of course, my regurgitated thoughts and emotions and random thought processes and word bubbles were coming to fruition, and i started to make sense of it all. i understand abby. just like i understand ellie. and that’s all it boils down to: understanding. they are two sides of the same coin. for fucks sake they live in a fucked up world surrounded by fucked up people and fucking undead fungus people trying to kill them around every corner (i could literally go on and on and on about the different factions that came to be after outbreak day and how they parallel current/historical american society, and human psychology in general, but i digress)

ANYWAYS, to make a long story somewhat shorter, i played abby’s storyline. of course, i was enamored by her—i feel this sort of similarity, personality wise, with her. the reserve she maintains, her sarcastic, oftentimes dry sense of humor, her passion. abby anderson may be a lot of things, but she’s nothing if not passionate—and you can see it everywhere, in her love of books, in the way she loves her friends, in her honesty (debatable), in the way revenge takes over her body and mind (because passion isn’t always positive, you know), all of it.

i got over the...incident... after my second play through (also partially because in my brain everyone's alive and happy and have all ten fingers and are safe and sound in their beds at night and free of physical pain and emotional turmoil). i now have over 1000hrs on the game (hello autism) and i...find something different about the story every. single. time. about abby, about her life, about everything, how it's all connected and different and the same and fucked up and beautiful.

she’s guarded. but she’s somehow…gentle. i don’t know how to explain it. i want to hold her and squeeze her and kiss her forehead and tell her everything’s going to be okay and never let anything or anyone to hurt her ever again.

she’s special. and she’s…abby. and yeah- i love her physically, but i love her mental.

[jeannestreetmedium]

Breaking Patterns of Prescriptions: From Medication to Holistic Healing with Audrey Stimpson

-JOIN US for SOUL SHINE-

Remember who you really are - reconnect to your inner wisdom. Experience life aligned with your soul's true purpose, free of blocks and pains, full of joy, fulfillment and abundance.

When you’re on your soul’s path, joy is present and miracles are a regular occurrence.

(2) - 60 minute calls a month

-Access to a private member portal with session recordings, recorded meditations, spiritual trainings and more. 

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Join us here!

  Hello my beautiful friend and welcome back to Unconditionally Loved!

Today's episode features the wonderful Audrey Stinson, and trust me, you're in for an emotional, authentic, and enlightening conversation.

Audrey Stimpson is a Certified Functional Nutrition Counselor specializing in ADHD, autism, autoimmune, hormonal imbalances, and gut-brain health. 

We dive deep into Audrey's path of getting off Adderall, a medication she was on for 23 years, and how it led her to a profound realization about her identity and authenticity. Her journey of self-discovery shows us the power of stepping away from our comfort zones and breaking free from addictive patterns.

As we journey through Audrey's narrative, we also touch upon the importance of healing our bodies and minds holistically. She shares how her experiences shaped her approach to wellness, including gut healing and the mind-body connection.

As a Certified Functional Nutrition Counselor, Audrey is coaching others on their journey towards freedom from stimulants as well as others struggling with ADHD, autism, autoimmune, hormonal imbalances, and debilitating chronic health conditions due to poor gut health. 

Audrey's journey reminds us that healing isn't a linear path. We explore how setbacks, such as her son's diagnosis with cystic fibrosis, can both challenge us and inspire us to dig deeper into our healing process.

Through her journey, Audrey embodies the idea that you don't have to be fully healed to help others. Join us as we navigate the raw emotions, intimate revelations, and powerful insights that emerge from embracing vulnerability.

Get ready to be moved and inspired by her courage, authenticity, and dedication to creating positive change.

You are unconditionally loved!

Jeanne Street

    Get your FREE copy of my Work your Light Guide

www.JeanneStreet.com

—

Let’s hang out on social!

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Check out this episode!

[cure-icy-writes]

Five things you may find in my fics

Tagged by @ofstormsandfire!

Autism. It’s been there from the start, honestly, long before I realized it. It’s usually not tagged unless it’s the focus, but the autistic coding just sort of…seeps in. Girls who struggle to adequately perform femininity because gender is a social construct that they’re too autistic to understand, boys who get called creepy for having intense interests and weird stares, latching onto the explicitly autistic characters and thinking “wow I wonder why I’m so attached to them, surely it isn’t for any reason!” In recent years it’s gotten more explicit, probably because I’m more aware of it.

Trauma. Make of it what you will, but trauma and it’s impacts are a recurring theme in my works, often in conjunction with imposter syndrome and autistic adults learning to unmask and confront the fact that their childhoods weren’t that great honestly. Trauma isn’t rational, and it’s not linear, but if you confront it and give yourself kindness, rewire and work around the broken parts, you can find a lot of healing and fulfillment.

Horror. This is a fairly new development, actually, but it’s one I’m really enjoying! I’d say my interest in it was sparked by the magnus archives nearish the beginning of quarantine, and I realized that while I can’t handle visual horror very well, I actually love some well crafted horror! I usually like it to be character focused, written format is best but audio is good. It also makes the psychology interest go brrrrrrrr!

Platonic love. I’m something of a casual shipper, but I also feel like ships are overrated and there’s so so much potential for exploring non-romantic relationship. I love it when unrelated characters have sibling energy, when they’re ride or die, when they’re in a qpr or something more ambiguous that doesn’t fit into the Amanonormative Narrative set by society. Like you guys what if they were found family. What if they were besties. What if a responsible adult came along and said “my kiddo now” and got the adoption papers. What if a girl loved a boy and told him, and he loved her back, and it was platonic all the way through?

Character-centric stories. I consider characterization one of my strongest skills as a writer, up there with dialogue, and it’s so fun to make heroes who hate their job, or villains who are actually just fucked up parents that never got grief counseling and made that everyone’s problem. My newest one that I’m obsessed with is a thirty-something who appears mentally stable, but it’s slowly revealed that they were emotionally neglected as a child and it’s something they’re forced to cope with as the matter becomes more prevalent. They don’t have any big dramatic event in their backstory linking them to the current story, but rather, the themes of family and neglect and communal child-rearing and the meaning of a legacy are what ties the whole thing together.

Anyways! Tagging @dino--draws and @catlliecal if y’all want!

[honeygold-dew]

Extraordinary Attorney Woo Ep 14: Well.

So I’m back? There was an unauthorised login to my account so I’ve avoided posting here ever since, idk if anything’s resolved? But I decided to just post this since I haven’t shared my thoughts in a while. And wow do I have a lot jumbled in my head right now. Let me just type and see how this goes (once again, from someone on the spectrum).

Firstly, I do think the show is changing direction. What started off with myself as an autistic audience connecting with Youngwoo, because she expresses how she feels, is now turning into a Youngwoo who is being shut out. I feel like the show is not focusing on how she feels and experiences things anymore, especially in episodes 13-14, and is just displaying her as a spectator to things that happen to her.

The Youngwoo I got used to, who I adore from the beginning, is one to give Junho the reason why she wants to break up. She will think of him, she will not want to hurt him, and she will communicate her feelings to him as she has done in the past. I’m not mad at Junho, he’s visibly upset and startled and confused and anyone says anything when they’re experiencing those emotions. This is the most rattled we’ve ever seen Junho, actually. Even when he’s drunk and punching people in bars, he’s sure of himself. This time he looked completely lost and, just, sad. What annoyed me, though, was Youngwoo written to just walk away. He asks and she answers, she asks and he answers, that is how their relationship has always been. Of course this could have been done for the classic *kdrama affect* and they want you to suffer a little more before they get the characters together again, even if it’s out of character for Youngwoo, but I still think it’s flawed writing. Youngwoo can stay in character and they don’t have to get together. She can communicate how she felt and doesn’t have to accept when Junho insists she does make him happy. She can decide she needs to think, needs a break, and needs to discover how they feel when they are not together. That would have made me ache in all the right places, and that would still have Youngwoo express herself.

Arguments can be made the other way, of course. The show is about Youngwoo growing and navigating life, demanding her independence, and that growth isn’t always linear. Youngwoo not expressing herself as much as she used to in difficult emotional situations could be because unlike when she talks about her autism and the experiences she lived through for a while, she has not had time to process these ones. It’s her first relationship, and I myself have shut downs in these types of things, but Youngwoo isn’t known to have shut downs. Very possible for a real life scenario, but I still think it’s bad writing for a show, especially since it’s not shown to us in a way that says Youngwoo is feeling too much, confused and shutting these out. Instead we get… no insight at all into how she feels until secondary characters kind of force her to say it, which I don’t like. If Youngwoo is sad, show her sad. If she cries because of what Junho’s sister said, let her cry. The beginning of the show relied on the fact that she’s a relatable, loveable and heartfelt character. Park Eunbin is an outstanding actress. Autistic people cry. Autistic people worry about how they make others feel. Autistic people stress over making sense of their emotions. This would have been the perfect time to show all of this, in something so normal such as a relationship. This would have been the time both the allistic audience and the autistic audience relates to Youngwoo.

Instead, they make it the time the autistic audience kind of gets escorted to the back and it’s for the allistic audience to go “aww poor Youngwoo :(”. It’s episode 14, pitying time is long gone – it’s relating time. It’s love. Use better cinematography, use better scenes to display emotion, use better writing. This was great in the beginning, did they get slack because of the popularity of the show?

We also have no idea what Junho’s personality is like yet outside of being nice. Since they’ve gotten together we’ve just seen Junho and Youngwoo tackle things, mainly Junho helping Youngwoo out, but I would have loved a scene where Youngwoo asks Junho a lot of questions about himself (especially since she said she thinks about him as much as whales!! She’ll want to know everything!!) and have her make him smile by getting him this cute gift of something he told her he likes, or bringing up those things in their conversations sometimes, or anything really. Something along the lines of Youngwoo, without a question, really liking him more than just the drama showing Youngwoo going out of her comfort zone for him (which is quite significant in itself, but I think it would be nice to see Youngwoo in their relationship more than just her autistic traits). It would have been perfect with this thing of whether Youngwoo can make him happy, too, because we would’ve already seen her actively making him a smiley happy dude in all ways she can and the angst would just,,, take over your chest when the “am I someone who can make him happy?” line settles in, to us and Junho (if the writers were smart and had her communicate when he asked).

Another thing… suddenly Minwoo is a desirable, sweet guy for Sunshine Sooyeon? And they both awkwardly like each other? …God. This was obviously the “second leads get together” thing coupled with them being conventionally good looking enemy characters, but this is so dumb I wanted to see Sooyeon falling for sweet Chef Hairy and laugh at his dad jokes once!!! I wanted to see Geurami throw daggers at Minwoo while they were dating because he was mean to Youngwoo!!! Geurami aggressively getting a guy (however unworthy Minwoo is) and winning!! Minwoo stumbling after her however reluctantly!!! Sooyeon falling for the chef’s food and sincerity!!! What kind of writing is this, to randomly throw Sooyeon and Minwoo in as a couple after zero chemistry throughout the rest of the drama? The rest are so much more fun, oh my God.

Despite all of this, I still don’t really mind the show. It did get taken down from 5 stars to 3.8 in my head but I’m still enjoying it and waiting for next week’s episodes. I said in the beginning that I’m watching this show as I watch any other kdrama with neurotypical leads, because Youngwoo is more than an autistic character and this is a kdrama in nature, and so far it’s been true to that. This has all the great-in-the-beginning-but-sometimes-meh writing of every other kdrama I’ve seen. The amount of things that didn’t make sense (and annoyed me!) in Business Proposal and Weightlifting Fairy and Gangnam Beauty and What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim and pretty much all the lighthearted dramas – but they were still enjoyable dramas despite having their uhh moments, that’s kind of how I feel now.

(I’ve seen much more than those btw, pretty much all, but those are the lighthearted ones I can name at the top of my head.)

Overall, it’s a kdrama. 2521 had the worst writing of the year to me and it was still deemed one of the top dramas of the time (the number of complaints at the end would have got the show kicked off the air but it’s still here haha). If this were not a kdrama this writing would bother me much, much more, possibly be deal-breakers. But if I can handle the kdrama classics which rely on constant nonsensical tropes in the name of love or whatever weirdly traumatising angst for the viewer, I can deal with them failing with Youngwoo’s love and the other love interests for now. Maybe it’s a personal thing since I still want this show to do well. As an Asian it’s very huge that a show about a wonderful Asian autistic women is still so popular and loved, despite the writers making dumb decisions. Every k-pop idol out there is watching this and urging their fans to watch too, so many that I’ve lost count. Youngwoo’s and Geurami’s greeting song is viral in SK. Other famous k-actors are supporting this show every week. Extraordinary Attorney Woo is bigger than me. This show will affect me and how I am seen when I say I’m autistic, and at the very least I’m glad it’s making women with autism seen in a less bizarre, more adoring light. I have visibly noticed a small change since the drama aired. I like the change. I like the conversation. I want this to do well.

The tropes are as frustrating as dramas with neurotypical characters. To other Asians living in Asia I don’t think what I talked about would even be picked up as active downsides, just generic this is usually how these plots go. I have my complaints, which do disappoint me since I didn’t expect the change in direction, the change to what they show of Youngwoo, and they could’ve easily done other things that would’ve had better impact. But it’s not a deal-breaker for me either at this point in time. I do enjoy the show and want to watch it to completion, just to see my girl Youngwoo happy and thriving (with Geurami and Chef Hairy only, Youngwoo’s best squad since Day 1. The rest not invited to the party. Maybe Junho depending on what happens next, but no promises).

Fingers crossed the last 2 episodes next week go well!

[theprideful]

i believe whats being referred to is your post about how there isnt severe autism (paraphrasing, bad memory) and a couple autistic people with high needs replied that youre wrong and how its a bad take. might be worth checking the notes but i saw it in passing

interesting. when i said severe autism doesn’t exist i meant that there isn’t a linear spectrum of “more autistic” to “less autistic”. there’s just autism. i never once said that all autistics are the same or that some of us don’t need more support than others. i simply said that you can’t quantify how “severe” someone’s autism is because levels of functioning are going to vary from person to person, day to day. and there’s no status quo, or checklist or quotient you have to hit to be considered “severe” it’s all very subjective and in most cases, ableist and reductive as fuck. plus functioning labels are used to rank autistics in order of “usefulness” and ability to imitate/replicate neurotypical behavior, which is an unfair system that dehumanizes higher support-need and nonverbal autistics. that’s why the community is generally against the label “asperger’s,” because it separates autistic people deemed “intelligent” and “worthy of respect” from those with intellectual and motor disabilities (aka ableism). it’s also autism speaks rhetoric whose harm was efficiently demonstrated in their ABA era. im not interested in debating functioning labels because they’re harmful and have led to autistic people getting abused/neglected/denied access, and also im not a pokémon or dnd character, im a human being who is complex and my support needs vary on different days, depending on a multitude of factors.

[scoups4lyfe]

Hebi Anon

Excuse my ignorance but why would an indirect visual metaphor help Taro understand more than direct consequences and actions? (Reminder, my neurodivergency takes the form of extreme logical thinking)

Taro tells the truth about his coworker -> Coworker gets punished and is unable to visit his mother -> coworker(s) get (emotionally) hurt.

That is direct evidence right in front of his face that his actions caused problems yet he's still completely and utterly confused.

To me that's the equivalent of Taro not understanding why someone got hurt after Taro stomped on their foot

Tarou's mind doesn't flow from a --> to b --> to c

It's more like a dot chart where sometimes he'll be at a and then he'll be at z. This is why its so hard for him to realize his actions have consequences.

He doesn't have the tools to look back and reflect "ah, my lie caused my co-worker to get hurt"

(This is confusing right? Cause shouldn't that be obvious?)

But for Tarou, these things are NOT obvious, which is why visuals help.

In the Uniquely Human Podcast --which I found while doing my research on Autism (the dude that wrote the book has a podcast, that's why I read the book) ; they discussed a very...interesting example

At one point They (I think it was the guest speaking who was telling this story) got called in to consult on something.

There was a boy (in high school) that would start talking to his seatmate and get mad anytime the teacher told him he was disrupting class.

"I'm not disrupting class. I'm only talking to my seatmate, not the rest of the class."

Everyone else would be like ?????? hELLO????

So the Lady got out popsicle sticks to work through what he was thinking.

(I’ll include the audio here so I don’t have to transcribe everything:) (the clip is 2minutes btw)

But basically,

Just telling Momoi “some lies are good” gets him nowhere.

Seeing the reactions ALSO gets him nowhere because he doesn’t understand /he can’t interpret them and place them in the order they should go in for him to make logical sense of them the way we would.

You could see the reactions and go: “Oh they’re upset because I told the truth and they got in trouble.”

A = I told the truth

B = Got them in trouble

C = They’re upset

For Momoi he knows A) that he told the truth, but he doesn’t connect that to B or C.

(Again, because his mind isn’t a linear flow of a -> b -> c. So it’ll be a -> z -> g -> b -> t; therefore making it impossible for him to connect “a” to b or c)

Which is why he doesn’t understand why telling the truth (in that case) was a bad thing.

It’s the same in the cafe. They got “This is a BIG problem!” And his reaction is ?????????? Because ? Why would that be a problem?

He (again) hasn’t connect A) that he told to the truth, to the consequences B and C.

Doesn’t even realize they’re right next to each other.

So Haruka saying “there is such a thing as little white lies” is helpful but he still doesn’t understand what that means.

He also is bad at reading social cues, so while he understands they are upset (esp cause they’re voicing it at him) he again doesn’t know why.

The example you give is apt, because it could be entirely possible he wouldn’t understand why someone got hurt after he stomped on their foot.

Sonoi using the moon was SO good.

Because (1) the moon was visually in sight.

(2) he used scientific / logical basis even for something abstract.

“Beautiful lies”

On its own, Tarou wouldn’t understand what would make it beautiful. But the moon? The moonlight? That’s beautiful / often described as so. Therefore the moon being a liar because it’s beautiful light isn’t it’s own helped Tarou to understand

This is why he cries, because Sonoi went down to where he was at, absolutely judgment free.

Sonoi understood him.

He understood Tarou didn’t understand, and therefore he used a visual aid and a logical thought process (logical because it’s based on scientific fact that Tarou would know, and therefore easily understand)

In that podcast episode I shared an audio clip of, the guest speaker talks about a thing called “forgiveness theory” where if someone on the spectrum looks stoic, capable, and is able to do things people will absolutely judge him/them if they make a mistake or do something probably socially unacceptable

but if they were awkward then it would be easier to forgive them and try to help them understand.

Which is why, no matter at what level they are on the spectrum, there is no such thing as “they have it easier” because the things they can’t do well or understand, people will absolutely destroy them for.

I feel like this is SUCH a big case for Momoi. Because he just seem so, SO capable.

(Again, you — yourself described him as perfect.)

This is why when he blunders or does something we perceive as not making any sense. “How could he not understand?!” Just because he is very good at a lot of things and seems capable, does not mean he understands what we can, or that he’ll think logically the same way we do.

For Tarou his biggest weaknesses are in the social arena, especially when it comes to actions and consequences.

You said in an ask I haven’t answered yet that you sent in a little bit earlier then this one that Tarou has never apologize verbally (as far as you know) even tho his actions have hurt others esp how he has physically hurt Haruka (pushing her etc), and that if he apologized you wouldn’t hate him as much, so I would like to say that

I don’t think Tarou knows that he’s hurt others (esp in the moment / as it’s happening) and I don’t think he realizes his actions have hurt Haruka.

“It seems I’ve hurt people.”

(I.e They told me I hurt them and I didn’t know)

In episode 5, he gets upset at Inuzuka for opening someone’s package and eating it, “That’s wrong.” And then he forced Inuzuka to go apologize and make it up to that person.

This tells me that if Momoi did connect actions and consequences, he would apologize to Haruka if he knew/realized what he did hurt her/was wrong.

The conflict here, is that he doesn’t.