#autumn says things

[autumnbrambleagain]

It's like, you go up to Baldur's Gate 3 and you're like, hey, you're a fantasy game. Can I play as something weird? Like maybe a centaur? That's a fantasy race, right?

And Baldur's Gate 3 says, uhm, no. You can play as a human. If you really must be different you can play as a dragonborn.

And it's like. oh, neat! That's like, a dragon?

And they're like, well, it looks more like some kind of fish... maybe like, you know those shrink-wrapped dinosaurs from the earlier days of paleontology?

And it's like... oh. Okay. What about modded races? Did someone mod in a centaur?

And BG3 is like, buddy. Buddy. Do you know how hard that would be for fans to animate? We don't even have a modding toolkit for you to use. Of course not. You can't play as a centaur. You play as a human.

And it's like... no, sure, of course, I'm sorry for bothering you.

You go to Caves of Qud and ask if you can play as a centaur.

CoQ says oh, sure, one of the first npcs you run into is a taur! The extra legs let you outspeed enemies and also give you a carry weight bonus! But what's that over there is that your fursona

and i'm like, oh, what, uhh

and CoQ is like, yeah! What is that, two-headed, four-armed foxthing? Why don't you play as that instead?

and i'm like, I'm sorry, what?

and CoQ is like, yeah, having two heads lets you wear two kinds of helmets for different bonuses, and also lets you use mental abilities quicker AND helps you shake off mental effects faster! the extra arms lets you stack up a whole bunch of weapons at once, it's a really powerful base to build your character around!

And I'm like... well... what about the visual representation of it?

and CoQ goes, we use sprites with 2 colors and negative space, so you don't need to relearn 3D modeling and animation to have your guy represented in the game with the same fidelity as everything else that already exists in it! no problem!

and like... of course, the Thing You Can Play As isn't the only factor that makes a game good! but after experiencing this, it's so hard to enjoy games like BG3. Like yeah the story and its writing and your ability to affect it are unmatched in BG3 it especially makes Bethesda look like hot steaming garbage!

but i have to either play as a human or a shrink wrapped fish dinosaur from 60s paleontology to do it? and every game makes me just play as a human. the most fantastical games with the craziest settings all mostly moderate themselves to "medieval europe... with a little bit of weirdness"

meanwhile in CoQ turning a locked door sapient, recruiting it, and giving it a chaingun so i have a literal metal door wielding a chaingun is a perfectly viable answer to getting through a locked door

anyway that's why i think the developers of CoQ should be given the budget of BG3 tyvmia

[treacherousautumn]

lol some of these bots that’ve been infecting my follower count dont even have a blog title or even a pfp. theyre not even trying anymore.

[b4kuch1n]

one string is all that I need

[orchaic]

a bit late but happy mid-autumn festival to those who celebrate!! ft. shi-long lang 🌙🥮✨

[bewareofthenewphannie]

they said they'd move in together for a year and now it's been more than 12 years let me cry

[traumabuddies]

seven sentence sunday

tagged @heartbeatdiaz thank you!

Here's some of what I just wrote for my angst in autumn fic!

“Hey, uh,” Buck starts , hesitant, once they’ve been driving for about thirty minutes, surely hoping to break the suffocating silence, “we should do something on our next day off, you know?” Eddie can’t help the snort-chuckle he lets out. There’s nothing happy about it, nothing comedic about how he feels about Buck’s words. If anything the saliva in his mouth tastes like acid when he swallows next, everything he’s been refraining from saying all morning—scratch that, since Buck asked him to pick him up—suddenly buzzing under his skin, crawling up his throat, and he can’t hold it anymore. His hold on the wheel tightens. Maybe he shouldn’t have been the one driving. “Oh, so now that your girlfriend dumped you and you have no one to spend your spare time with, you wanna hang out? Is that it?” Screw sparing Buck’s feelings, what about his?

tagging @rogerzsteven @buckleyseddie @buck2eddie @lover-of-mine @panbuckley @alyxmastershipper @oliverstaark @911onabc if you want!

[sea-jello]

happy mid autumn festival to my girl chang’e today is literally her day

[my-lover]

bridge of orchy, scotland

[chiropteracupola]

DANGEROUS GAY WOMEN with EXTENSIVE CRIMINAL RECORDS and EVEN MORE EXCESSIVE DEGREES OF HUBRIS in YOUR AREA!!!

[woundedsaint]

Look at the light through the windowpane. That means it's noon, that means we're inconsolable. Tell me how all this, and love too, will ruin us.

Last Toast by Anna Akhmatova (translated by Katie Farris and Ilya Kaminsky); Succession (HBO) - All The Bells Say; Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out by Richard Siken; No Children by The Mountain Goats; In Her Arms (2017) by Malcolm T. Liepke; Litany in Which Certain Things Are Crossed Out by Richard Siken; Making Amends by Mary Warburton; Caligula by Albert Camus; Photography by Derek Ridgers; Autumn by NIKI; Scheherazade by Richard Siken.

[catching-zzzs]

happy hozier season to all those who celebrate xx

[autumnbrambleagain]

like wow I can't believe they let Lana Wachowski make the matrix 4

the first 30 minutes of the movie is literally just her standing in front of a blank screen saying "Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you." for like 30 solid minutes

just looking at every redpillcel chud proudboy who appropriated her metaphors and going "fuck you" looking at everyone who took away nothing but bullet time going "fuck you" looking at the world for getting so fucking bad and going "fuck you" talking directly to warner bros and saying "fuck you" for making her make a new one, i can't list everything because my woman went on for 30 solid minutes and did not even repeat a single fuck you it was 30 minutes of solid fuck yous

and then the rest of the movie is a matrix movie in the barest fucking sense at all it is medieval allegory level of a matrix movie okay i'm talking we got characters named Do-Goode and Righte-Living and they're on a quest to find the fabled city Submission-To-My-Lord-In-Adversity medieval allegory level of a movie ok

every FUCKING line every character says is on 3 levels of medieval allegory level no one has a throwaway line that isn't metareferential to the movie itself, the act of watching and judging the movie, the effects the movie had on society vs the effects they had hoped it would have,

characters appearing just to talk to the wachowskis and keanu and the original staff literally saying shit like "i grew up on stories about you, neo, even if you think you didn't change the world how you wanted, it still meant something to us, look at the life we built because of what you made"

like there's literally a new city where machines and humans live together and neo's like "i wanted to end the war entirely :c" and the characters are like "yes, but look at what our side has become at least c: " and like the metalayer is so fucking paper thin this isn't a movie about "what happens 60 years after the last matrix movie" this is "what happens 20 years after we released the last matrix movie in real life no for real"

the villain is LITERALLY and METAFICTIONALLY using neo and trinity to his own perverted ends twisting what their story was meant to be about and forcing them to be together even when they were supposed to be dead and the sequel is them going "well if you're forcing our story to not be over we're going to rebel and make it about what we want it to be about"

the movie literally ends with lana wachowski walking onto screen and dragging david zaslav out of his chair in the WB headquarters and going "hey fuck you for making me make a new matrix movie, fuck you, but thanks for giving me a chance to try to make another big impact again, but still fuck you"

i don't think i've seen a single criticism of the movie that the movie didn't already predict and have an answer for in the movie itself

like there are people who are like "eehh but where was the humanity it was so meta" it's like my dude this is Piers Fucking Ploughman, you aren't watching this to see the continuing adventures of the story, we are well past where the story ended and now we're in full blown allegory town and if the first 30 minutes didn't prepare you for that then honestly buddy you need to go back to 9th grade english

"oooh but neo just uses force push every fight scene" yes it's making fun of you for wanting to be distracted by 20 minute long fight scenes and having neo be so fed up with this shit he just turns on wallhacks and cheats his way through every combat encounter

"uuooo it was so boring" my dude you walked into Synechode, New York and expected a popcorn thriller fuck you

"it felt very unnecessary" i'm sorry did you miss the central thesis of the movie which was "this is unnecessary, why are we being forced to make this, fuck you" ??

look at this revieww

"The Matrix Resurrections" carries on as if it has something important to impart to folks looking to see cats in mirrors and bullets in slow-motion. There is action, but it seems remarkably old-fashioned.

i went to the car wash, and it was just a bunch of nozzles spraying water on my car, what the fuck?

The film also stuffs itself with footage from the earlier films just to remind us – because the public is stupid, right? – that this is the same series but only serving to remind us that this is just the same old, same old but nothing like as good.

imagine going into a movie and missing the point of something so perfectly, it's like

honestly, i don't have a metaphor for how completely fucking DIRELY this idiot missed the entire point of the movie this is incredible, media literacy is fucking dead my dudes, which is also something the matrix 4 spends like 10 minutes of lana wachowski standing on screen on a white background just making eye contact with you going "fuck you. fuck you."

The plot is absurd and largely impenetrable, the visuals just a rehash of a visual style we’ve seen before and any superficial pleasure we might get from seeing Reeves as Neo and Carrie-Anne Moss return as Trinity (and a slightly larger-than-life turn from Neil Patrick Harris as The Analyst, creator of the new iteration of the Matrix) are quickly snuffed out as the film smothers us in a tidal wave of its own smug self-satisfaction and the mistaken belief that we’ll welcome this stuff back into our lives like some long-lost old friend. The Matrix Resurrections doesn’t even try to be metaphysical or pseudo-intellectual, it’s just content to regurgitate a concept quite happily and adequately explored 22 years ago but with absolutely nothing new to offer either narratively or visually. Frustrating, futile, and foolish, The Matrix Resurrections is largely utter guff.

imagine walking into a movie called "I am going to insult you if you fuck this up" and fucking it up and the movie spending 2 and a half hours going "Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you." and going "yeah i dunno it didn't feel very welcoming or friendly for some reason, i don't know if it had anything to say"

the movie literally has executives bring neo and trinity back from the dead and they spend the entire movie justifying their reunion because they weren't supposed to survive or be together again and people out here really be like "but you just gave us neo and trinity again, why did you think it would just work like that?" and meanwhile they're hallucinating because all that's on the screen is keanu and carrie-anne going "fuck you. fuck you. fuck you."

The rehashed story is convoluted, existing under the guise that if you can't follow along, it's because you aren't smart enough to understand.

so you weren't smart enough to follow along, huh? that's okay, art movies aren't for everyone. let's see the rest of your review let's see,

Some of the scenes (and even lines of dialogue) are almost identical to the movie’s predecessors. It’s the same movie with slight changes, much like “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” or “Ghostbusters: Afterlife,” and it relies too much on nostalgia and the goodwill of sci-fi fans.

yeah buddy it's maybe not that the movie is too convoluted, it's that maybe you have 0 media literacy and you shouldn't be a film critic. holy fuck is this all it takes to be a film critic? you don't have to be media literate at all?

you guys walked into an art movie that was just keanu reeves, carrie-anne moss, and lana wachowksi standing on a blank screen saying "Fuck you" for two and a half hours, and you half-hallucinated an action movie and somehow came away disatissfied the action movie you were hallucinating wasn't as cool and hip as you had hoped it would be

fuck you

matrix 4 unironically one of my favorite movies absolute fucking masterclass of 300 cuil metalayer infiniteoroborous commentary 1000 years artistic triumph

[jessiesjaded]

random picture dump :)

[thethingything]

I'm absolutely determined to pay attention to all the seasonal changes and embrace them as much as possible this year and to try and romanaticise it. we've tried to do the same for the last couple of years too but I think we're getting better at it over time

[dykefever]

have purchased vitamin d and iron supplements i'm about to be so so strong guys .....

[taniushka12]

there needs to be more Barry fics fr fr fr, I know the last time he appeared in game was 12 years ago but cmon, he is So important