#bad at homeostasis

[glittergroovy]

POTS blinkies

[a-magical-knight]

Let’s make 2024 the year we all chill the fuck out holy shit

[thefirsthogokage]

Very helpful thread made for those walking the picket lines by an EMT in Florida:

(screen shots from here on out. Too many images to put in one post. Sorry for the dark mode switch ahead of time)

[Image ID: a tweet thread made by @TheMaryGirls on July 18th, 2023 that reads in its entirety (though combined where appropriate and tweet numbers removed for condensing):

This is for the strikers everywhere since I'm nowhere near a picket line. This is the least I can do:

I am an EMT in Florida, one of the hottest states in the country on a regular basis. These are things you can do to protect yourself from the heat

1. Water

Water is great, your body needs it to live. You can go longer without food than you can without water. It's vital. If you become too dehydrated you can lapse into something called Hypovolemic shock which is the most dangerous form of shock because, usually, by the time you realize something is wrong, you're already in a bad position.

When you sweat, you're not just losing water. You're also losing salt, potassium, chloride, magnesium, & calcium. To combat this, you should drink something with electrolytes.

You can also eat a banana in order to avoid cramping that can occur with the loss of potassium. You don't want to be the one doing the Charley Horse Hustle on the line when people have phone cameras. You can also eat fruit and veg with high water content. They helps.

A word of caution about ice water. I know the idea of a big bottle of ice water sounds great when you're sweating your balls off on the line but NO! That can be dangerous. Your body temperature is up due to the heat. You chug a bottle of ice water like you used to do with Smirnoff Ice in college, you'll regret it. Ice water will cause your body temperature to drop which fraks up your homeostasis. You can experience stomach craps, fainting, and, on some weird occasions, cardiac arrest. Face planting on the pavement isn't cute.

One way you CAN use ice water safely is by soaking a t-shirt or towel and putting it on your head to help cool you off. Also, cold rags around the wrists can also cool you down. You've seen construction workers with the t-shirts on their heads? This is why.

2. Whole body

If you get blisters on your feet, you need to treat them. Also, don't force pop them, you're just asking for trouble. When they rupture, they need to be cleaned with soap and water (no alcohol or peroxide) and protected. Band-Aids won't really help here.

Band-Aids can easily slip off and give bacteria a chance to move in and really get gross. Liquid bandage is the better option. It's waterproof but it does sting when you put it on so be warned.

If you experience muscle cramps on the line, you need to deal with them. This is your bodies way of telling you something is wrong. Sit down, drink something. Stretching before picketing can also help prevent them. Let's be honest, as writers, we sit. A LOT.

Going from a cave dwelling hermit to bright sunlight and exercise is going to piss your entire system off. Icy Hot and hot baths will be your friend.

3. Dehydration warning signs.

Muscle cramps

light headed

headaches

feeling very thirsty

dark urine

urinating less often

feeling tired

dry mouth, lips, or tongue

skin tenting

confusion

That's all that I can think of at the moment.

GO FUCK EM UP!!!!!!!

/End ID]

Bonus:

[Image ID: Tweeted comment on the thread from @/sardoniccomment that reads:

Every word of this is good advice, but, as a former desert-dweller, there’s something I need to add: dehydration makes you stupid. It can literally prevent you from being able to figure out the source of your problems is dehydration.

/End ID]

[nerdykorgi]

GRIMWALKER BIOLOGY & ANATOMY STUDIES [pt 1 / ?? ]

(aka, my ideas and thoughts on how these bad but sad boys work!)

with pictures :D !

ok for starters! I tried my best to make real life connections with actual biological stuff and yeah but there are some things ima have to bullshit lol

i hope yall like rambling

[ ^ Basic ideas ]

Lets talk about anatomy!

From what i can tell from the grim walker ingredient book they have some pretty ... interesting ingredients...

GALDORSTONE:

Heart and Power apparently. What i can make of this is that the Galderstone not only powers and animates the non-organic materials but acts as a circulatory system, flowing blood and nutrients to keep the body stable by creating magical pulses of pressure that makes the blood flow. Blood is kind of ideal for homeostasis and living and om pretty sure we've seen hunter bleed at least once... Perhaps the Galderston can create an artificial vascular system to carry oxygen, magic, and nutrients throughout the growing body instead of just making veins from scratch. I want to say the Galderstone can generate energy for the grimwalker but that would mean they wouldn't need to eat, and I don't think that's true. I think its main purpose is just activate the magic materials and is like the generator to a car, keeping it running. If the Galderstone were to break or fail, the grimwalker probably come unglued and fall apart to its components (which would be pretty horrifying)

ORTET BONE:

Very key component! The ortet bone kind of helps form the blueprint for the species of the grimwalker, as well as supplying blood, a skeletal system, and components of DNA. The most basic definition of the word ORTET is as follows: the original plant from which the members of a clone have descended. Fun fact: since were using cloning terms, Hunter is to Caleb as Ramet is to Ortet (Ramet is an individual clone) I did research for cloning and as it turns out you kinda need a complete genome for cloning but for bullshitting reasons (which will be explained) we can clone with incomplete DNA and make synthetic dna from scratch! I hypothesis that the reason grims can look different from the ortet instead of just straight carbon copies is due to the bone that is used and how much of i there is. Like example a grimwalker made using just a toe phalange is going to look A LOT less like the ortet compared to a grimwalker made from something like the cranium and bigger bones and such. Basically smaller bones dont carry as much dna info and leads for room to fill in the blanks. Sadly this means alot of Grimwalkers had A LOT of health problems (this can range anywhere from immune system problems to liver failure which is quiet typical in clones, that and it is often that clones appear different from the ortet due to enviromental factors and influences)

[ As the image above shows, subject #103 has a very close resemblance to the ortet due to the bones that are used ] There are pros and cons to using bones! Pros being that they can hold DNA for much longer than tissue, but the thing is bones can degrade really easy if not preserved, and i don't think belos had a bottle of hydrogen peroxide laying around that he could dunk Caleb in, so let's just assume he made sure his brother's corpse was well cleaned and kept. Biggest con is the human body only has so many bones (about 206) I believe that the reason Grimwalker can generate organs is by using the ortet and making the stem cells created from bone marrow. Stem cells are very important because they can turn into different types of cells like blood and tissue cells as well as repair tissue. I believe the process of growing grimwalkers is kind of like "Self-renewal" the process in which stem cells divide and make more of the body

STONESLEEPER LUNGS:

Im just gonna assume stone sleeper had very small lungs because aint no way those t rex lungs fit in a teenage boy. I originally thought The reason that Grimwalkers can stay underground for so long is because the lungs, similar to how a stonesleeper hibernates for centuries (kind of like how wood frogs can basically cryo-hibernate) by petrifying but a grimwalker IS growing and therefore needs resources to grow, like how a baby does in the womb. So it has to be actively getting said resources so it cant be petrified. I now think the reason that grimwalkers have these lungs is because theyre easily compatible to the galderstone, which needs oxygen for the blood and that they can be easily harvested and stored in stone form. But that does give room for cool adaptations like self-petrification! (which i will get into next time :D )

PALISTROM WOOD:

Ok its says that the wood is used for keratin, which is a fiberous protein which can make all kinds of things like scales, hair, nails, feathers, horns, claws, hooves, and skin! And since its also a plant means it can grow 4 times as fast as normal keratin can! This explains why hunters hair grew so ridiculously fast in season 3, was because his hair can produce its own carbohydrates and nutrients on its own... This means his skin and surface wounds can heal quite fast! (down side is it might give him something similar to PSS (Peeling Skin Syndrome ) ...) I think Palisman is very important becasue of several reason! 1 Like palisman, it can "animate" if you will, more or less help pull off the illusion that he is alive. 2 Like mentioned before, Grimwalkers need nutrients to grow and I believe the palistrom wood aids in that! Using a process called cellular diffusion, the grimwalker can take in nutrients from the ground around them (which i theorize to be highly fertilized) through THEIR SKIN! and into the veins and flesh of the grims 3 I believe that in the process of forming, the galderstone "activates" the palistrom wood, forming into skin or hair but this process of rapid growth leaves the skin all undone and fragile because a proper cutaneous barrier was not formed yet (which is useful for being malleable. This is why Hunter's ears are so 1 .god blessed big because they are fake and molded to look like that. Its also why The grimwalker Belos possessed fell apart so easily, like he said "It wasnt ready")

SELKIEDOMUS SCALES:

This one kind of confused me because... well why do we need the seal flesh when the ortet can just regenerate it?? I think its kind of like the stuffing if you will, it also speeds up the process of producing flesh by a lot! Especially if you want to make grown grimwalkers! Im thinking that Grimwalkers don't have a set "age" theyre just as big as however many materials they are given to work with. Even though the book says they can start as babies, if you look closely there is a check mark towards the more adolescent figure, so im thinking that they are not ready to be unearthed until they reach a certain growth ima guess around the age of over 10-ish?? We don't know how young Hunter was pulled out of the floor but it seems like he was fairly young, or atleast younger. This means while Hunter appears to be 16, he might have only been living for around 5 years or so.

Now typically normal seals have a lot of blubber which is a thick layer of fat, also called adipose tissue, directly under the skin of a marine mammals. Its used for insulation. The thing is tho, it says Selkiedomus Scales, not flesh... Dont worry there are mammals that have scales like Pangolins but i dont know if these scales are like thick plated or small and stretchy. Magic bullshitting time, Im goin to assume Selkiedomus scales refers to a layer of scale-like flesh that protect the creature from boiling but is also highly malleable and easy to work with. Maybe the reason they can withstand such heat is due to unsaturated bonds of butadiene molecules mixed into the blubber that are highly heat resistant Selkie domus flesh is molded and into the relative shape of desired body and using the DNA of the ortet the flesh is reshaped and reused into the desired muscles shapes. The vascular system created by the galderstone spreads throughout the flesh and binds with it. healing together and becoming flesh, kind of like a speed up version of skin graft maturation! This is useful for growing them quickly because they don't have to grow an entire adult body from scratch so this speed up the process by eeeerrm 20 years or so lol

Thats only the basics for now, sooner or later i shall get into the more fun stuff, like adaptaions of Grim walker, the growing process, ad more!

Hope you guys enjoyed my ideas, if i got anything incorrect let me know, my research isnt exremly searched through.

last question ill leave you all with, it kind of stumped me while i was working...

i have a theory but i wanna know your thoughts...

(i worked hard on all this btw, i really hope people read it lol /lh.)

[honeytonedhottie]

finding balance in the age of indulgance⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🪷

increases in access to pleasure, causes a degradation of mental health, so we need to learn to find balance in the age of indulgence. my resource for this information is this link right here : https://youtu.be/aEfkx3DsXjs i highly recommend doing further research if its something that interests you

pleasure and pain r colocated. this simply means that the place in the brain that processes pleasure is also where it processes pain. it works like a sort of balance, and our brains will try to maintain homeostasis. this is being able to take a break from pleasures sometimes, bcuz too much of one thing, good or bad, is never good.

to go deeper into this, when we dont learn to control our pleasures, like lets say u like to watch youtube videos for pleasure, when we over consume we end up building up pain and when we finally stop the pain/depression/lethargic feeling is astounding.

dopamine overload is in a nutshell easy access to pleasure is crippling ur ability to enjoy life. we r over-consuming ourselves to DEATH.

how can we help ourselves? - dopamine fasting is abstaining from screens or things that u are addicted to for a period of time. taking a break from dopamine will restore balance so to reset ur dopamine u need to abstain

last but not least, self binding. literally PUT A TIME LIMIT ON UR PHONE or just build the self discipline to set rules and guidelines with ur dopamine. its so good for u and you'll be rewarded tenfold in ur quality of life if u learn how to control urself. create boundaries to keep urself under control

[wazzappp]

Retroviruses got me fucked up

@moosemonstrous are u ready for a dissertation? I hope so.

people who followed me for art I'm so sorry

ALRIGHT so we're gonna cover a couple areas.

General information about retroviruses.

Details about The Corruption and theories about how it works inside the body.

SPECIFICALLY ROBBIES viral weird shit. Cause what he has going on is even more fucked up than normal fucked up. Fucked up squared.

Me ranting about skin necrosis and why I shouldn't have just. Thown it in there because I thought it would look fucky wucky.

GENERAL INFORMATION ABOUT RETROVIRUSES:

As most people know, a virus is a cell that enters the body of a host and alters its DNA to turn that hosts cells into virus making factories. This is what allows viruses to duplicate and spread through the body so quickly. But whats that? 'What makes retroviruses different from other viruses?' I hear you asking? WELL EXCELLENT QUESTION THATS A PERFECT PLACE TO START. A retrovirus is different because its method of self duplication involves an enzyme called reverse transcriptase. This makes retroviral infection PERMANENT. Even if the virus is defeated by the immune system, those changes stick around. The phrasing used was 'ipso facto mutagenic' meaning 'by the fact itself/inevitable'.

...Which is kinda metal honestly I want it on a tee shirt (definetly not thinking of Amadeus saying that to Robbie as he tries his best to explain theres no way to undo whats going on with him. nahhhh angst don't got a hold on me like that [<- vibrating])

'Ohhh but if those genetic changes never go away, doesn't that mean that those viruses will get passed on through peoples children?' ASKING SUCH GOOD QUESTIONS TODAY MY MUTUAL BECAUSE THE ANSWER IS YES. Once a retrovirus codes itself into a hosts gnome, its called a provirus (pro gamer move right there) Fun (not fun) fact around 8% of the human gnome is made of proviruses. These are called endogenous viruses, and for the most part they just kinda sit there and stay dormant. TERRIFYINGLY, other viral infections can trigger these endogenous viruses out of dormancy. As for what actually causes a provirus to go dormant uhhhhhhhh I dunno. Couldn't find an answer in my research someone make me look stupid with an answer please because I wanna know.

Ok now lets talk about the immune system a little bit. There are a few different kind of cells at work (hehehehehe) that help to fight viruses and other infections in the body. The first are Cytotoxic T cells or Killer T Cells. These are the cells that directly destroy cells displaying genetic patterns they recognize as bad. Next we have CD+4 Cells (Helper T Cells) which act as a library that stores information about how to identify an infected cell, and shares that information with other Killer T cells once one figures it out. Then there are the Regulatory T cells which suppress your immune responses to maintain homeostasis. They're what (USUALLY) stops your immune system from killing you while trying to clear a virus. Last there are Macrophage. CELLS AT WORK MAID MILFS- I mean cells that clear the debris that remain after the Killer T Cells are done destroying them.

Retroviruses have two primary ways of either side-stepping the immune system or just. Overwhelming it completely. Acutely transforming retroviruses do just that. They reproduce too quickly for Killer T cells to destroy them all and exhaust the system. The second type are called Non Acute Retroviruses. They camouflage viral particles as immune cells to suppress the immune system. For example, HLTV-1 is a retrovirus that disguises itself as a Regulatory T cell to artificially suppress the immune response thats trying to kill it.

HTLV-1 is really interesting because most of the time patients are asymptomatic, but 5% can graduate to HTLV-1 associated myelopathy/tropical spastic paraparesis, which affects the spinal cord and white matter of the central nervous system. This usually results in the weakening of lower extremities and sometimes total bowl/bladder control loss. It suckkssssss (but is also a retrovirus that affects the central nervous system so were circling back to it later 👀).

SPECULATION ABOUT THE CORRUPTION:

I've said previously that The Corruption has potential for a retrovirus that affects the central nervous system by degrading the brains ability to regulate muscular contraction, while also pumping out a ton of cortisol and adrenaline to encourage 'hysterical strength'.

Now I did a little more research about Hypoglycemia and combined with the nerve damage people would likely die from cardiac arrhythmia, which is a life threatening kind of ventricular fibrillation. Long and short, it means their hearts don't have the proper energy and stimulation to keep beating properly, so they stop beating in sync. This results in insufficient blood flow to vital areas like the brain, and combined with the inadequate blood sugar, this would result in very fast brain death.

Let's talk about the immune systems response to this Corruption retrovirus. We would most likely see lots of inflammation, and with the main focus being on nerve cell this would probably result in meningitis, which is inflammation of the tissue surrounding the brain and spinal cord. If left untreated this could result in a coma and then death. So we're seeing a SHIT ton of pressure on the brain and central nervous system. Which is like. VERY BAD for a person. We're talking brain death very very fast.

As for how the virus would target the nervous system directly we could look to real world examples like rabies (ahhhh rabies. can never get away from you). The virus would attach to nicotinic acetylcholine receptors, which are what turns chemical signals into electrical signals in your nerves. It would then spread through the axons of the central nervous system and eventually reach the brain. We could also pull a rabies with 'once you see symptoms it's too late' which I, personally, find fucking terrifying.

In terms of the virus losing its effectiveness once outside the body of a Demon/Kaiju we would likely need to look at the anatomy of a retrovirus itself. The outermost area is composed of envelope spikes, which tell the cell to let it in. After that is an envelope protein which plays an important role in complete virus particle (virion) assembly. Theres then a protein shell that contains reverse transcriptase and the RNA gnome that it will use to recode a host cell. If this virus evolved to survive in an environment that is always warm (hell. lol. lmao.) it might not be prepared to deal with these colder temperatures in our world. This could result in damage to the protective protein barriers and cause damage to the real important parts, the RNA and reverse transcriptase. This would mean that the virus would not be near as effective as a fully intact retrovirus cell.

The Corruption could be an endogenous virus thats embedded into the Demon/Kaiju gnome that wouldn't affect them, but would absolutely affect us because we haven't seen them before.

ROBBIES WEIRD FUCKSHIT:

alright guys this is where we put the FI into SCIFI cause your about to read a whole lot of nonsense sentences.

Robbie. Robbie is fucking WEIRD in EVERY universe and this shit is absolutely not different. Him being exposed to that previously mentioned damaged version of the virus from a young age might not give him true immunity but it would give him SOMETHING to work with. His immune system is at least slightly familiar with it and at this point whatever damaged version he came into contact with has already established itself as a provirus in him.

The Corruption thats established itself in The Charger is different.

Like I mentioned in my first diagram, I think there was a chemical reaction that stabilized the corrosive aspect of The Corruption, but this reaction would also have had an effect on the retroviral properties of the Demon/Kaiju material. ESPECIALLY when we add Eli into the mix.

Now, I think generally the amount of radiation that these viruses would be exposed to would kill them (if you believe viruses are alive. there is some MEGA debate going on about that). But if the corruption was just stabilized/hardened on the outside and left squishy and organic on the inside, that would successfully protect everything. And whats that organic squishyness on the inside? EXCELLENT QUESTION AGAIN. If Eli died while inside The Charger then it's not a stretch to think his DNA would have been incorporated and stored via through the natural processes of the retrovirus as a provirus. And so you end up with the genetic mixture of a horrifying creature capable of heinous acts, and a Demon/Kaiju. WITH retroviral properties. Dear god.

Robbie would get exposed to this the very first time he enters the Charger. Because of his semi-immunity + genetic relation to Eli he would likely be able to overcome the more meatsuit damaging aspects of this mixture and just get right through the genome editing without much fuss from his immune system. We would still have a certain degree of damage to his nervous system which allows for that change in strength that would occur in usual examples of the virus (maybe some added aggression from mild influence in his amygdala), but not to a deadly degree. Honestly this shit would barely classify as a virus its just. A nightmare mutagen at this point. So while some of his gnome would remain fairly the same, a good 30% to 50% is megafucked.

Changing Robbies genotype to this degree will naturally result in a change to his phenotype! For the sake of fun were gonna ignore stem cells and their weirdness (for now. I just need to stew on it a little longer and I can make up some bullshit I'm sure). The damage his muscles would experience from less regulated signals would mean they experience muscle tears and subsequent muscle growth. For usual muscle damage from exercise this takes a few days, so if we wanted to keep with that timeline it could be interesting to introduce some minorly sped up healing. That would also be fun for reactivating the growth plates in his bones to allow him to become bigger and taller overall (boring body horror my beloved @cicada-candy that term is never leaving).

THEN you can get into some of the fucky wuckier traits like tapetum lucidum and TEEF. TEEEEEEFFFF. The teeth in particular could go a few different ways. You could just have growth and development of the canines resume until they become elongated and more prominant. OR. You could replace the teeth with bony protrusions from the skull that would push out the original canines and grow in their place. Because of the time it takes for bones to heal your looking at this happening around 20 weeks out. Literally any fun trait you want to take from Demon/Kaiju could apply here.

The most important part would be the nerve bundles on his spine that would be used to bluetooth to The Charger (<- this is a nonsense sentence. I am aware of this). These would provide faster communication with the charger and (theoretically) more intuitive movement, while also allowing him to eventually controlling the charger from the outside. Please note that this would cause EXTREME STRESS to his nervous system. It would be like a person trying to flex a muscle the size of another person for the first time. LEARNING PROCESS. TAKE IT SLOW OR HAVE AN ANEURYSM.

Which leads me to the youtuber apology part of this.

WHY I SHOULDNT HAVE JUMPED TO SKIN NECROSIS:

Skin necrosis is a result of the mass death of skin cells that is furthered by the damage to blood cells. This usually results in a blackened, leathery texture to the necrosed skin. I SHOULD HAVE NEVER EVEN MENTIONED THIS.

What I SHOULD have done is said 'hmm ah yes it would make more sense for some protective covering over these nerve concentrations to either come from materials in Robbies body or to mutate into the skin of the Demon/Kaiju'. This is why we do sufficient research before getting back on our bullshit, wazz (mental note mental note mental note mental note).

I am quite partial to the idea of that stronger/thicker Demon skin/armor growing under Robbies skin and it just itches and burns until he cant ignore it anymore. And then he can pull off. Whatever skin is on the top of it. HEHHEHEHOHOHOHO DELICOUS MENTAL IMAGE of him panicking because he just wanted to scratch his back but now theres blood on his hands and skin sloughing off and dear fucking lord how did he get to this point in his life (<- I daydream about normal things guys don't worry. very average things).

ANYWAY uhhhh if you made it this far I love you. Legit. Have a cookie. Take a nap. Have a happy holidaze <3.

[according2thelore]

different anon jumping in here but hot damn i'd read 500k of just your slice of life vignettes about this ls/es crossover. plot is so beyond unnecessary for this one holy shit just please hit a million word count giving us this juice. not sure if you had plans for first time/established but i'm now fantasizing about the added layers of all the varieties of it. the dark spiraly angst of es!bros who never crossed the line and have just barely begun to think about it, all naked panic and throes of guilt and excitement, trapped in a timeline with ls!bros who crossed it years back and can't help poking at the es versions of themselves bc they both know how hard it was for them. or, even better, if all 4 are still sort of peeking over the fence at the possibilities and ls!bros are going on year 30 of angsty mutual pining and here come the versions of themselves who made these emotions the ugliest that they ever were ... yum. yummyyyyyy please keep going

AAAA thank you so much!!!!!! :,)

i'm so honoured and glad that you like them! 🥰 these are so fun to write, so i hope you all keep thinking they're interesting, lol!

in my head, i've been picturing ES!Sam&Dean as being not "together," and as LS!Sam&Dean as being pretty firmly together/established.

it happened around a year and a half back, the slow realization that they both felt the same way, that the ownership and protectiveness and fear that close wouldn't be close enough, that they had for a while--single digits while. there wasn't any big "thing" that did it, just a bad hunt and a slow recovery and with all the god business, it just seems fair that they finally get to have this. it doesn't even feel like anything "new," more like an extension of what they already are to each other, what they already do. more of an equilibrium, a homeostasis, the world settling back into how it is supposed to be.

sometimes dean finds himself in the reflex of leaning away before he remembers that he can actually lean forward if he wants to. sam kicks his brother's shins under the table when he's being a dick but kisses him afterwards.

but ES!Sam&Dean are still stuck in the early stages. ES!Dean spent years mourning and hating sam for leaving, thumbing old polaroids of him in his middle school theater costume until the film starts to peel away and the picture underneath chips. sam had been hoping that the time apart would make his stomach less riotous, something with more ability to be tamed, but after jess and during the quiet moments spent in motel rooms, driving while sun filters through the windscreen and warming denim-clad legs and old leather, sam realizes that nothing has changed.

it makes him feel even more wretched because was he using jess this whole time? no. he loved her. he really did. dean just chips away at the hardest parts of his grief, the most isolating, with quips and burgers and big, earnest eyes. but how can someone find space for anything that's not dean in their chest, when he looks over with a betrayed moue and his hand glued to a beer bottle?

with sam's nightmares shaking him awake almost nightly, they've gotten in the habit of touching each other, fingers on wrists and dean's palm at the back of his neck and ankles crossing under tables and eyes tracking chapped lips and sides pressed together all the way down shoulders-biceps-forearms-waists-hips-thighs.

so when ES!Dean tries to find LS!Dean to ask him about the keys to the armory--because, hey, cool--he sees the door to his bedroom open. he sees the two pillows. sam's house shoes on one side of the bed. dean's on the other. the lube on the fucking nightstand that they don't even bother to put away because who ever comes over

and ES!Dean is...floored. fucking agog. and he gets even more flustered around LS!Sam and more convinced that this is some kind of alternate timeline/universe or something in which sam actually wants him back

he's blushing whenever LS!Sam looks at him and can't stop looking up at his not-so-little brother, built like a statue and making dean sweat with his fond smiles. he can't stop jerking off to imagining what it would be like to pull him down into a kiss, or feeling him from behind as he presses in. and this makes LS!Dean even more unworthy in ES!Dean's opinion, a murdering bastard drowning in gold and splendour. he thinks about it all the time--can't stop thinking about it. ES!Dean tries to catch LS!Sam's attention like 'me too, right? i'm good enough too, right?'

plus, it also fuels his anger at LS!Dean bc how did sam find out? how did this happen? did you force sam into this, you sick fuck? we swore on mom's grave that he'd never find out. no way sam actually wants us, no fucking shot.

if ES!Sam finds out, it would all kind of blow up, i think. it would be messy and sam would be furious because is that what ES!Dean's been trying to do and why he suddenly can't look either sam in the eye?? he wants to fuck LS!Sam?? what is different about him that ES!Sam doesn't have? it's kind of a betrayal on both fronts: a brother that only wants a specific not-ES!Sam version of sam, and a version of his older self that steals his brother out from under him.

not to mention, the whole time LS!Sam&Dean are looking at their younger selves with a weird mix of glee and pity, bc they don't even know yet, know what the word "brother" means, how it can mean everything at once, and to what extents they are willing to go to keep each other.

ARGH! it would be so messy!!! the tangled webs of longing and possession and just sheer goddamn need!

but anon!!!! you're so right!!!!!!!!! if neither of them are together, and suddenly they have to interact with these younger versions of themselves, who, if they can't have each other--who knows? with their big eyes and clear admiration and longing? these feelings have never been easy, but with ES!Sam&Dean, they're so messy. they bleed want, and it's agonizing to witness. idk...makes u think...

anyway. thank you for this lovely ask anon! and for your kind words!! if only i could write a million words about them, lol! x <3

-lizzy

(for the new: ES = early seasons, LS = late seasons; the other ES/LS posts can be found here!)

[tuneseeker]

homeostasis.

when you fall asleep your breathing slows — to a deep, even inhale and exhale.

usually, that's indicative of how safe you feel. you're relaxed, calm. you have the utmost trust in him. your head knocks into his shoulder, and ebenholz adjusts accordingly so you don't acquire creases on your face from his "boney-ass shoulders".

his fingertips lightly poke your cheek; once, twice. you don't stir, content to snuggle closer.

he sighs, how embarassing.

but there's no bite behind his words. in fact, the corners of his lips even seem to quirk up a tiny bit.

ebenholz doesn't make a habit of lying, so he's not going to say he doesn't care for you. it's easier than he expected, to open his heart and let you see.

there's a space your image resides in, between his cracked ribs and the fibers of his lungs.

sweet dreams, he whispers, watching your lashes flutter briefly. his hand reaches for yours, and you automatically open your fingers so he can slip his between them. gute Nacht.

💌 a message from tuneseeker! t'is i! the one good thing about having no requests is that i can write whatever i want without feeling bad about it <(˶ᵔᵕᵔ˶)> happy (late) lingering echoes rerun!

[gowns]

THIS IS VITAL. Do not convince yourself that you have "insomnia" or go into bed thinking you're going to have trouble sleeping. Even if you've been professionally diagnosed. Doctors don't care about you the same way you care about yourself, so keep this in mind. You're one of many patients to them so you need to take control of your own health, and sometimes that means completely rejecting their advice and diagnoses. You need to tell yourself that you're simply going through a rough period and sleep might be difficult, but you're fine. I can't stress how important it is to psychologically believe that things are fine and/or will get better. A major component of insomnia for people who suffer from anxiety is the very anxiety around not being able to sleep. The anxiety compounds the issue and it thus becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. It's one of the many cases in humans where if you believe it's a problem, it WILL be a problem.

You need to find a way to, over time, decouple the association between sleep and whatever negative delusional spin you're putting on it. Do not predict the future with false and irrelevant evidence from the past. A bad night of sleep, or no sleep the day before does not mean it's going to repeat in the future. This is highly ILLOGICAL, but your brain won't care about this, it will force those thoughts on you. Be aware of your own cognitive behaviors and beat them out with clear, logical thinking. Obviously, this will be difficult since emotional states cause us to think delusionally, and insomnia along with the accompanying sleep deprivation will make it worse, but the big takeaway is to realize that you can't really trust your brain at this time because it isn't functioning properly and is under a lot of stress. This process can take time, be patient with yourself, especially if you think nutrition might be a factor. It's vitally important to remember that YOU CAN FALL ASLEEP. EVERY HUMAN HAS THIS ABILITY unless you have extremely rare genetic disorders or severe nutritional deficiencies that can EASILY be corrected.

You need to realize that it's ENTIRELY NORMAL to have problems falling asleep for days, weeks or even months at a time. Your case is likely NOT UNIQUE, and many millions of people over millenia have suffered and successfully recovered from this disturbance. It is scary because it is happening to YOU, but take comfort in the fact that it is also common and treatable. This is not blind hope, or lying to yourself, these are FACTS THAT YOU NEED TO CONSTANTLY REMIND YOURSELF OF because your brain will already be doing a great job of bringing you down with negative thoughts. You must truly believe that you're going to get better and fix the problem, while taking every possible step you can to move the dial in the right direction towards progress.

Take comfort in the fact that many people have sleepless periods like this for various reasons. Stress, nutritional deficiencies, terrible diets, anxiety, grieving, depression, breakups, divorces, etc. It's crucial to remember that all psychological stresses will diminish over time and you will return to normalcy. Your brain is constantly adjusting towards homeostasis, so YOU WILL HEAL IN TIME. YOU MUST KNOW THIS. Don't get obsessive over how long your recovery is taking, or set arbitrary goalposts (e.i. "I should be fine in a week"). Take things one day at a time.

Also be aware that stress depletes magnesium, which is responsible for reining in ruminating thoughts and relaxing you. Again, I urge anyone with insomnia and/or anxiety to do ample research on magnesium. It is absolutely a life safer.

[x]

[glittergroovy]

[skydigiblogs]

honestly thought i would have a lot more to say about adventure 02 but like

i just finished episode 50 and the jist of my thoughts really are "yeah this is better than i remembered it being"

overall, an extremely ambitious follow up to digimon adventure, balancing a lot of plot points and an attempt at having a more cohesive storyline than "bad guy of the arc but suddenly it's apocalymon." in 02, most of the bad guys lead from one to another, in a way that seems much more intentionally thought-out than everything up until the dark master's arc in 01. even the one-off antagonists (dark ocean and demon's crew) played into the larger narrative, and weren't necessarily treated as one-offs so much as chances to expand the scope of the lore and use it to the narrative's benefit.

(although i do think it's a bit sad we never saw follow up on demon going "oh, you all are going to regret sending me to dagomon's ocean SOOOOO much")

also a lot of lore. so much lore. 01 introduced the fact that homeostasis has a bunch of agents that look like gennai, but a2 kept suggesting they're all copies (put a pin in that for my tri rewatch, much as i am loathe to rewatch that one). there wasn't any elaboration, but it is an interesting idea, and unfortunately i understand why it was kind of hastily noted and dismissed (the world tour arc had a lot to get to).

also the dimensional makeup of the digimon franchise got a lot more fascinating in 02. in 01 gennai mentioned that the gate could lead to all kinds of different places, but 02 actually takes that a step further in the lore, showing us the dark ocean and the dimension of dreams (even mentioning that the latter is pulled from by the digital world).

but it does maintain some of the problems i had with the original adventure in that i do wish more of the kids got to see their mega forms. :/

(i know tamers fixes that somewhat, then frontiers backpedals, but. you can't get me to rewatch frontiers lmao.)

furthermore, it does kind of suck that we're still left to wonder about ken's adventures in the digital world. we see ryo and millenniumon in his flashbacks to the adventures, but for audience members who missed out entirely on the wonderswan games, it makes it so we have to trust wormmon's word that ken was a kind person in the past. it's shown to an effective degree in the show, especially with his flashbacks to his childhood after the chimeramon arc.

it also makes narrative sense that they didn't feel the need to go over a story that's already happened, because that likely would have taken too long for 02, which already had so much going on. but maaaaaan. i do not want to play the wonderswan games, frfr (though i know there are fan translations out there for 'em).

i do love ken's arc though, as frustrating as him struggling with self-doubt is to watch. i'm glad the writers didn't make it seem too easy for him to forgive himself, because that's hard even if you weren't the vessel for like. All That Shit. i'm giving this boy a weighted blanket and hot tea.

tl;dr: compared to the oftentimes fever-dream like qualities of 01, 02 feels a lot more narratively focused in its story, and i think that really works to its favor. not a flawless season, but none of the digimon seasons are. a successful sequel to 01, much more so than i remembered from my last rewatch of the dub in 2020.

[redditreceipts]

hi varona, it's the same anon from before. so i replied to the TIM with what you had written, and this is what mister "Charlotte-chan" had to say:

"Hating me won't make you feel better about yourself while accusing me of things I didn't do. I can only hope you find homeostasis one day rather than having to externalize self hatred. You hate not only yourself but the other half of the species because of paradoxical feelings towards them. You feel your existence is tied to them despite your fears and resentment and thus towards yourself

Your transphobia has no affect on me. I know who I am. I refuse to fall to your level and lack of empathy. Women, men and transfolk alike are hurting. I won't forsake them

One day I just hope you can let go of this lie and slave mentality. How you achieve this is up to you."

what do you make of this?

Okay, so here's what I would answer (if you're still texting):

"classical use of thought-terminating cliché. What is a thought-terminating chliché? According to Wikipeda, it's:

"A thought-terminating cliché [...] is a form of loaded language, [...] intended to end an argument and quell cognitive dissonance. Its function is to stop an argument from proceeding further, ending the debate with a cliché rather than a point."

Examples: "Stop thinking so much." – Redirects attention from the topic, idea, or argument at hand to the alleged overuse of thought itself. "Let's agree to disagree." - Used to stop discussion of an issue rather than attempt to resolve it.

What you just said was: "All of what you say comes because you are hurt yourself". You find this holier-than-thou-rhetoric more than anything among religious and spiritual people. Other examples include:

"What you are saying comes from a place of hurt"

"You just hate me because you hate yourself"

"You just disagree because you haven't found Jesus yet"

"I hope you find peace and healing instead of being angry about [justified reason to be angry about]. "

"If you learned to love yourself, you would be able to love others as well and not be so upset"

"You just want to make others feel bad because you feel bad as well"

There is no way in proving or disproving any of the things you said. It doesn't help the conversation. If you have an actual argument, I'm still happy to hear it"

But idk, I'm kinda a smartass sometimes and don't pick up well on tone of conversation (it's because of autism I guess). Maybe another answer would be better. but that's just genuinely what I got out of this conversation.

[shrinkthisviolet]

do you have any headcanons, old or new, for the kf!Barry possibility? i am so intrigued by it, fascinated even and i'm curious about your own takes, or what's the most interesting thing about it to you?

Ahh I love this question! It’s an idea I periodically get obsessed with from time to time, and I’ve talked a bit here about how I’d write it. And to expand:

I’ve never been a fan of Killer Frost’s split personality thing in the show, and it’s not comics accurate, so I’d probably do away with it. It’s just the general colder body temperature affecting his mind (chronic cold effects are terrifying, and that wouldn’t even be as bad as this, because this is inside him), not to mention his constant hunger for body heat to try to reach homeostasis (comics-based and…also, given biology, makes sense)

There’s a few different times I could give Barry powers, though I love the idea of them manifesting during s2 and him using them to defeat Zoom, freezing and shattering him to pieces

On the other hand, I also love the idea of them manifesting during s3, the way KF’s do in canon, maybe after he’s already met his frosty E2 doppelgänger. I doubt he’d team up with Savitar…unless Savitar was Iris and they became a genuine evil duo (not the leader-subordinate dynamic that Savitar and KF had in canon, but a true equal partnership)

He could also get powers in s1, and they start to affect his mind. He’s snappish, more irritable…and most of all, he doesn’t trust Eowells (especially if Iris is the Flash, and CSI Barry’s hero worship for Eowells is overridden by suspicion and worry…especially as he starts noticing more things off about Eowells)

And, to slip in a little Barrisco, I think KF!Barry and Reverb might’ve been the dynamic duo on E2. So KF!Barry on E1 might be very keen to recruit Cisco and replicate that…👀

Maybe he becomes an anti-hero like KF does in canon—still with villainous tendencies, but using them in service of the heroes (I do usually love that trope 💞)

I also have quite a few thoughts about “what if I wrote him in the Morgan AU as a spinoff AU” (4 additional headcanons for anyone interested in that):

He gets powers from the accelerator in s1, and they affect him as per the first headcanon outlined above. And, ofc, no split personality

He doesn’t fall into a coma, and instead, decides to use his powers to protect Central City. He doesn’t tell anyone—and if Iris is the Flash here, he ofc can’t tell her. While out on patrol one night, he meets a young hero who calls themself “Sentry”—definitely a kid or young adult, and definitely in need of guidance. Barry might not know how to be a hero, but he knows how to guide people. Probably (and their powers certainly make them useful…even if he’s horrified at that fleeting thought)

Barry and Morgan’s dynamic is thus pretty different. It’s less equal from the start, and it never really approaches that. Morgan looks up to him, and Barry…doesn’t quite look down on her, but as time passes, it gets close. Even as they become friends outside of their superhero identities, she’s still very much someone he needs to protect, not so much someone he can count on to protect him

He also notices some things are up with Eowells and Morgan. Some…not so great things. As time goes on, a picture starts to form in his head—abuse? Neglect specifically? Something. He’s only a CSI, he can’t investigate that…so he drops anonymous tips to CPS. Eowells gets out of all of them, and Morgan is visibly much more anxious after that, so Barry takes the hint and stops, but he’s still pissed that his effort was futile. But also…maybe it’s for the best. Where would Morgan go? Tina raised her for a little while but gave her back to Eowells, she can’t be trusted. (Maybe the only person he can trust for such a job is himself—and he should be horrified by the thought, but…he’s not)

send me an au and i’ll share 5+ headcanons about it!

Taglist (send an ask or DM to be added or removed):

@arrthurpendragon @ocappreciationtag @raith-way @vexic929 @ironverseocs @thechaoticfanartist @goldheartedchaoticdisaster @negative-speedforce @starstruckpurpledragon @angst-is-love-angst-is-life

[vgperson]

Vocaloid Highlights: November 2022

Rating for the Month: Ten-Ten out of Ten Highlights Archive

========== Stand-Outs ========== All in Good Time Ten-Ten New Moon Sugar Hive Hello Sallow Pinocchio Despair Bouquet Culture Blue Eyes Demon of Ifrane Future-Respawning Button On a Night Waiting For You I Look to the Moon YOMI Moon Leaf Breeze Umbrella Ameowcable Trickster Montage Specter Aqua Flight Any Question Answer Backside of the Earth

========== Worth Your Time ========== Cloud Cover Cute Monster Summer Lost Album Juvenile Merry go round Splatonic Checkmate Let's Am I (Weaving Inferiority) Red Land Marker Cast a Spell DAWN Until This Magical Moment Ends Blame and Tragedy Vixen Natural Lie Mad Sakura Theater out of memory bibibibe!!! Reunion Ghost Writer's Birthday Not to the Moon Jet Black Abyss It's Fine If You Misunderstood Spherascope Geminal Want To Be A Wonderful Person! I'm the Worst Long-Distance Swim A Summer of Running Around, You Smile Blind Slippery Eel Airborne Aspiration Keepcalm's Fifth Experiment Distict Marriage Blue Haide's Prayer To Think Sadness Could Be So Pretty Age 405 Ghost Party Expressor Dissolve Sugar Into a Bitter Life Want You Bad Bed Merry Bellflower Dying Town Escape Project Demon's Star Your Form Mad Flower Lieonids If There's a Reason to Disappear Lycoris Hallelujah (It'll Be Sunny) Day to Day Tortonenia Unhappy Meal Drop Dead Party Alleycat's Propaganda BLAST Regards, Stating Idealistic Thoughts Lodging the Rain Hidden Volcano Glad It Wasn't Me Non-Ethereal Body Troupe C-chan Winder Might Become a Cat and Escape Reality. It's I In the Blink of a Spring Kinda Floating Elopement, And Then Homeostasis Sai no Kawara Hallucination Scissorhands in vitro Flash Contract Lament, and Ordinary Days Go On Marginal Soul Phony Daydream Windy Day Golden Slumber Irea Serena Past the Higan Cocoon North Pole Silver Detour Comprehending Kid hell mp Deposit Opening Closing Out Start Line Sunbeam Garden Heart Arrow Sweet Vanilla Flavor! Straight Line Prologue Filmography (Un)seen Light Shined on a Room Pochette Deep Sea Distance Jeep⁉。

[confused-robot-cat]

In the final chapter of Digimon Adventure Tri, Homeostasis reveals that the real world can be rebooted just like the Digital World. Izzy, despite being the smartest person in the group, only thinks of how this would affect computers in the real world. The thing is, though, it is made explicit that not only would this affect the human's memories of Digimon, but it also describes how the world would "return to the quantum sea." The entire universe as we know it would turn to quantum foam and be rebuilt from scratch, like a second Big Bang.

And nobody's mind is blown by this in the movie.

Like, okay, rebooting the Digital World, alright, it's a "computer world," it's, it's easy not to think too deeply about it. But we're talking about an entity that exists beyond worlds who can, on a whim, revert all of reality as we know it to nothingness and rebuilt it from the ground up. This thing is a god. This is an actual, real god speaking to eight children about how it's going to start everything over again. And they're just like "oh no we'll forget our Digimon." Dudes, you're standing in the street with the only tangible proof anyone in history has ever had that there is at least one god with power over all creation. Fuck your fucking Digimon, react to that!

Also, nobody seems at all phased that their teacher died to save the lives of Tai, Davis, Ken, Cody, and Yolei. Tai feels no survivor's guilt? None of them miss the guy? Nobody seems to feel anything about that? We all talk about how weird it is that Kari and TK at least have no concern about the 02 kids going missing, but nobody ever mentions that Sora and Tai's homeroom teacher died.

Then there's Gennai!

When these kids met Gennai, they were lost in a very dangerous alternate world (there should be trauma there, why isn't there trauma?), and it was Gennai that guided them. He was an important figure in their lives. He even showed them how they came to be the Chosen Children and his role in that. So why, dear god why, does it not seem to affect them emotionally that Gennai has been corrupted by Yggdrasil? They accept him as their enemy and fight him, but they never stop to even think about trying to save him, to make him his true self again. They don't even question why he wasn't rebooted along with the Digimon. They just... Leave him to stay evil. Also the sexual assault of Sora. Again, this was a guiding figure in her life. A grandfather figure in a way. His presence used to bring them comfort and now he's been altered against his will and is exploiting them and acting so fucked up and... They don't seem to care that it's Gennai doing this. They hear he's been corrupted and that's all the explanation they need, suddenly it's fine, and they just have to fight him. Surely the fact this digital entity has a human face would have the psychological effect of making them hesitate just as much, if not more, as they did with Meicoomon?

So much goes unaddressed in Tri.

I really liked that Tai matured so much in these movies and was finally questioning the amount of damage they do when they host these massive monster fights in the middle of Tokyo. Yes they're trying to save people from "bad Digimon," but Greymon falling against a fucking building is dangerous. Tai is the first to recognise that, and the narrative - through Matt - sort of seems to punish him for it. But. I wanted more of that. I want to see the emotional effects of this stuff on the characters. Yeah, I don't want six movies of them moping around and reflecting and being all depressed and shit, but c'mon, they should be carrying some heavy fucking baggage by the end of all this. Instead, the conclusion to the whole six-part movie spectacular is Tai phoning Meiko and saying "hey we killed your Digimon but we're still going to let you be friends with us."

[therealieblog]

The key thing that people who promote diets for health do not understand is that our brain chemicals and bodies do not share our societally taught, moral stance on food. Our brains and bodies instead, function on a system of chemical reactions, synapses and homeostasis-maintaining biological systems that don’t give a shit about whether or not Cosmo Magazine thinks Doritos are bad for your health. 

The body contains a self maintaining emergency system for dealing with sudden health risks, like white blood cells to fight infections, blood coagulants to stop bleeding, fight or flight mode to protect us in emergencies, and increased hunger hormones to combat starvation.

What it does not do so well, is stopping us from eating too much. Our body’s survival mechanism surrounding food is a one way operation that doesn’t have an off switch, and it doesn’t care that you want to be thin. It doesn’t care that you’re restricting in order to fit into your wedding dress six months from now. It doesn’t care that your doctor ordered you to eat less cholesterol, or that you hate your thighs. It is a single minded machine, bent on keeping you alive. 

Because we have so little control over this self perpetuating meat suit that runs on chemicals and electric impulses, trying to get in the way of its self perpetuating system is designed to fail. It is the same as messing with ones ability to breath, or trying to stop from having sexual thoughts, or struggling to hold in one’s urine. The body must eat to survive. It will swiftly grow accustomed to having enough tasty food around to keep it fed and happy, and some people, for multiple reasons, end up getting fat from circumstances of upbringing, genetics, illness, or being subjected to diets in early life, 

If you starve a thin person, they will suffer and their body will fight back. If you starve a fat person, they will suffer, and their body will fight back. The size of the person when you start starving them, and the intellectual reasons behind why you’re starving them, matter about as much to your body as the chemical makeup of moon rocks. Your body does not give a shit about your moral stance on food, AND IT FUCKING HATES YOUR DIET. 

It will crave whatever amount of tasty food it’s used to, and if you try to stop it, it will fucking bite you. Do not fuck with your body. 

Find ways to work with it instead.