#bc it's hilarious to watch jack try to figure it out

[linguisticparadox]

"Van Helsing is laconic" okay is that because he's tired/stressed/concentrating very hard on Mina's condition in case she turns

or does he only get Weird around Jack

[aerodaltonimperial]

May I please get Hook attempting to show affection and failing miserably? ie -attempting physical affection and punching/headbutting someone at normal strength instead of at joke strength because he didn't know you're supposed to hold back or hugging/holding onto a handshake for inappropriately long bc he has no idea how those work or what the cues are -gift giving and having his brain absolutely combust when the other person does not like chips, as eating snacks together is his #1 way of being a buddy and he has NO idea where to go without that option -trying really really really hard to hold a conversation and accidentally coming off as annoying or brainless -puts his all into assuring someone with compliments and accidentally backhandedly insults them instead

All of these just being spitballs off the top of my head, no need to stick to any of them. Preferably Besties but really it would be fun with anyone he's ever associated with. Just him trying so so sooooo hard because he is so full of love and being doomed hilariously (but obviously still loved back despite that)

(When I got this last night I was like HILARIOUS but I couldn't get to it until today and today my brain woke up going no funny only feels so.... oops 🧡🤜🤛💚)

When he was in first grade, a group of boys at school always played together during recess: silly kid games, full of superheroes and bad guys and flying and, inexplicably, sheep, and Hook spent a few days watching them zoom around the blacktop before he decided he wanted to join. He went in halfway through, knocked one of them down onto the gravel, and then asked the rest where the superhero operations base was.

"You can't just barge in here!" One of them shrieked, offended. "You can't just come in and decide we are friends!"

Hook hadn't tried to do that again. And he hadn't thought about that disastrous attempt in quite some time. But when he saw Jack Perry getting jumped by the Firm, he barged out without thinking, like he had that day on the playground. He barreled into the bad guys, and then he stuck his hand out for Jack to take, a slightly updates version of his 6-year-old self's instinctive attempt to forget friendship.

Jack's eyes had lit up. He'd taken Hook’s hand. And even later, backstage, when Hook expected him to push Hook away again, he hadn't done it. He hadn't told Hook that Hook can't just decide they are friends through physical force. Instead, he stuck close and sat next to Hook while getting checked by medical.

And Hook thought: oh. Maybe we are friends, now.

++

In fourth grade, Hook had one friend who lived down the street, because that's the way childhood friendships worked: location. They would ride bikes and play with action figures and sit in Hook’s basement playing Playstation games, and it was an easy camaraderie because they had a lot of the same interests and followed the same baseball team. Then his friend's grandfather died, and all the other kids at school got some gifts, since everyone knew how close they had been.

He got baseball cards and a t-shirt and a limited edition comic book, and then, when Hook handed him a bag of chips, everyone around them had burst into laughter.

"Seriously?" One of them said. "His grandpa died and you're giving him chips?"

Hook doesn't say that they always eat chips together, and it makes Hook happy, so he assumed that it made his friend happy, too. He doesn't say that he had thought this would bring comfort and familiarity when his friend needed something. He just left. And they stopped playing together after that.

After he fishes Jack out of the dumpster, they sit backstage. Hook pulls a bag of chips out of his backpack and offers it without thinking; he doesn't make a connection that maybe chips won't help after being attacked and humiliated. He doesn't think about Jack not liking the chips. He just knows that if he were sitting there, feeling low, he would want something to offer a burst of serotonin. He panics with the bag outstretched between them.

Jack smiles, genuine. He takes the bag. "Oh. Hey, thanks. Man, I was really hungry. And I love these."

They sit side by side as Jack chomps on the Doritos, and Hook's chest feels warm.

++

In high school, Hook played lacrosse. They made it to state, lost, and then the next year, made it again. The second time, they won. They worked all season and trained until they could hardly breathe, and they won. Hook was so overcome, so excited, and bursting with gratitude and affection for his teammates. He threw his arms around his closest friend on the team and hugged him tight enough to steal both their breath away.

He'd been pushed away, rather abruptly. "Dude, what the fuck," his friend had laughed, kind of tinny. Uncomfortable. "You're so touchy-feely."

Hook hadn't thought that he was; he thought it was natural to reach out, to seek warmth, to desire a physical contact with people he liked. After that, he hung back. Didn't offer anything more than a fist bump, because people didn't take it the same way, as simply the instinctive wish to make meaningful contact. It sucked, but he adapted.

Until the tag match against LFI, when Hook ends up covered in Preston Vance's blood. When he stumbles his way back to the center of the ring after throwing the man around in the stands, with crimson coating his hair. They've won, but Hook knows he has to look a fright.

Jack moves in, and Hook does, too, without thinking. They hug, just like that, between the ropes, and it’s so fucking nice. Jack ducks his head out of the hard cam line and asks, near Hook's ear, frantic, "You okay? You hurt?"

"I'm okay," Hook says. He reaches again, twice, just to prove that Jack is also okay, that he's still solid and steady and warm. That they won. That the excitement bubbling up through Hook’s chest is real. And Jack doesn't push him away. Jack's arms go around him each time, just as eager. Just as determined to claw out that physical closeness in the wake of an impressive victory.

++

They used to tell him that he was overwhelming. That his texts about everything and nothing, all the time, were too much. That he needs to have 10 good friends instead of one best friend, so he isn't so intense all the time, so weirdly possessive over his friendships. Hook doesn't hate everyone. He's not trying to be stand-offish. It's just that the only way he knows how to be a friend is to be everything, all the time, at maximum level.

++

Maybe Hook is a little different. Maybe he's a little bit odd, just a hair off from the rest. Maybe his idea of friendship doesn't match up with everyone else. But maybe it was always just a matter of finding someone on the same wavelength.

After that match, they sit shoulder to shoulder on Jack’s hotel bed, freshly showered. They've got a movie on. Jack has leaned over against Hook’s hoodie; his warmth is comfortable. Hook lets his head fall against Jack’s hair. Maybe Hook really is weirdly intense when it comes to friendships, but hey: turns out, Jack is just as fucking weird about it. When Hook sends 12 texts in a row, Jack responds to every single one of them.

"Haha," Jack laughs, popping a Cheeto into his mouth. Hook can feel the laughter rumbling through both their skin. "Think he's gonna regret sparing that guy's life?"

Almost assuredly. "Hey," Hook says, apropos of nothing, just because the emotion is swelling in his chest. "You're my best friend."

"Duh," Jack replies, like it's obvious. "You're mine, too."

[transwicky]

In an au where Tango goes pro he ends up a Falconer while Jack is (still) a Falconer.

They've met, duh, so they're chill and Jack KNOWS what makes Tango Unhappy and HAPPY (overstimulated/overwhelmed/Autism Activated/whatever you wanna call it).

The others are Confused??

Tater only mildly because he HAS met Tango before, so he just chalks it up to either a Goalie Thing or a "Is this the "tism" thing that he mentioned back then??" and it's adorable watching Tater try to help but accidentally makes shit worse.

Guy, also autistic, will just tug Tango into what's been labeled as Guy's Corner of the nook, and just let the kid hang out with him.

The first time Guy does that, Thirdy and Marty immediately go "kid's got a 75% chance of being autistic too, proceed accordingly" and it's literally just them sharing a look and communicating that.

Poots knows day 1 bc Same Hat (look I got thoughts about the Rookie Joke Comment).

Snowy offers a fidget cube just to see, because his 2 allistic friends Ignore It, but Poots and Guy both go nuts (he calls it the Cube Test, there is NO science behind this method, it's NOT CONFIRMING ANYTHING SNOWY--) so he offers it to Tango.

He regrets it because Tango immediately uses the Clicky Switch but he decides that It's Confirmed ("IT'S NOT CONFIRMED" - 90% of the team, Poots and Guy included).

Family Skate happens and Tango brings Whiskey and Foxtrot and Scraps. Scraps is terrified (understandably), but he's not the one who gets the attention after 5 confused minutes of getting used to Tango's Cousin (he is literally now known as Tango's Cousin to the Falconers, and PR literally labels him that in photos of the two, it's hilarious).

The team, save for Jack, is SCRAMBLING to figure out who Tango is actually dating: Connor or Denice.

Jack just grins and says *I don't know* (he knows).

The owner of the team finds it hilarious.

PR shows photos of the 3 together, and it becomes an Internet Mystery that everyone is trying to solve, including some non hockey fans, simply bc someone posted it to the (Modern) Mysteries Reddit (is this a thing?? It should be).

All the others of the SMH he played with finds it hilarious.

(he's dating neither of them.)

[13elmst]

hi hello sry 4 spammin the dash but i did a really Bad Unwise Thing n brought in a third!! she's a once renowned olympic figure skater who turned into a swarm of beetles in the middle of the biggest performance of her career n the first evidence of her anomaly was caught on camera and made viral on tt for the world to see so !! naturally given her anomaly she's disqualified from performing now so she's livin life as a normal kid aka 2024 sua fresher studyin bach of commerce!! if u wna read up more on shiah u can find her full length intro here ( be warned, it's lengthy ), but otherwise pls LIKE this to plot! im also gna add some rally specific plots under the cut but yes!! tq 4 ur attn luv u mwah!!

orite now that i got the whole gang here imma just say shiah does not give a shit ab the rallies partly also bc she doesnt know jack shit ab them since she j joined but j a general note that id love for her to sorta get in the sch spirit!! so yeah if anyone wants her 2 root 4 them u have a swing voter in the midst !!

morning drills — shiah tends to go on morning runs so i feel like it'd be so funny for her to get caught up in a morning drill inadvertently if they happened to be running in the same direction like j imagine she's suddenly enveloped into their jog.... anw it'd be kinda hilarious ngl if ur muse was part of the morning drill too n she kinda took her anger out on u ORR if ur a random passerby who realises the girl looks hella outta place dressed in black next 2 these green folk n u decide 2 help her out!!

pranks — again shiah herself doesn't participate in the pranks but i'd love to see a prank being played on her !! change up her shampoo or smt !! do smth 2 rile her up ( mayb it wasn't even meant for her but she got caught in it ) n watch her turn into a swarm of blister beetles ....... wyd

live coverage ft. the curious currents — ngl i feel like i can see her gettin into a fight w someone not bc she's a fan but bc idk they didn't Watch where they're going or they're obnoxiously yellin their chants n she gets mad n idk pushes them n maybe ur muse doesn't have to be the heckler but they could just be reporting on the incident n realise wait ...... isn't this ....... kim shiah the olympic figure skater...?? alternatively if she's tryna mind her own business n u realise she's kim shiah n try 2 get an interview w her bc i think the olympics n rallies r sorta similar so it's like one athlete to another type beat ...? n she gets rly upset n starts fightin !! mayb even turnin into the swarm ( the more i say this the funnier it gets 2 me ) !! u could also b a bystander who decides 2 stand w / against her !! totally customisable !!

[ssahoodrathotchner]

Pictures of You

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader

Summary: you lose your memories of the last few years, including the ones of your relationship with Aaron. The rest of the team thinks it’s hilarious.

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: memory loss, swearing, some angst, hospital, talk of injuries, team shenanigans and fluff

A/N: okay this was a lot of fun to write bc soft!Hotch rights !! also really wanted to make the team play a larger role in a fic so here we go :)

Masterlist

---

You wake in a hospital bed, Morgan by your side, and a godawful pounding in your cloudy head. With a groan, you try to raise one of your hands to cover your eyes as Morgan’s head shoots up to stare at you with a relieved smile.

“Hey,” he says, catching your hand before you can lift it higher, “Don’t do that. You had a nasty fall, Princess.”

Satisfied that you won’t make any more moves towards your head, he sits back down at your side.

“Should I even ask how you’re doing or…” he trails off when you glare at him. “I’ll go let the team know you’re okay. Boss Man will be happy to hear you finally woke up,” and with that, Morgan is up and out of the room before you can even open your mouth because what.

Shifting around in the bed, you try to gauge just how injured you are, but the soreness in literally your entire body coupled with the haziness in your mind from the constant pain makes you conclude that you’ll leave it to the doctors to tell you what’s wrong. Sighing, you gently tilt your head to the side and observe the various beeping monitors.

The door opens and as you turn to see who it is, your mouth opens in disbelief. There’s no way. There’s absolutely no fucking way. This is fake. This is a dream. Your stomach simultaneously drops and fills with dread. How is this possible?

“You’re dead. You’re dead. We buried you,” you say in a rush, as none other than Emily fucking Prentiss stops by the side of your bed, looking at you confusedly. “Does this mean I’m dead? Are you a ghost?” you wonder out loud, and Emily looks behind her as the rest of the team, except Hotch, file in behind her, seemingly fine with her sudden appearance.

“How are you here, why are you here, what happened? You died. You’re supposed to be dead which means I’m probably dead,” you continue to ramble, frantically looking from at each member of your team and then back to Emily.

“What? Y/N, you aren’t dead. Just like I’m not dead,” she says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

“But you are,” you say shakily, chest tightening as your breaths become shorter and shorter.

“Y/N…” she says slowly, softly, “I faked my death four years ago.”

And with that, your ears rush and your mind goes blank. No no no no no no we buried her six months ago, she’s dead. You don’t notice the rest of the team trading glances around you as the world you thought you knew shatters and reforms in your mind.

“No,” you croak, throat suddenly constricting, but Emily only looks at you worriedly, Reid slipping out the door behind her.

“Y/N, can you take some deep breaths for me?” and your head turns to find JJ at your other side, hand on your shoulder. “Let’s breathe, you can do this,” she says, taking exaggerated breaths to demonstrate, smiling gently as you cooperate.

Reid enters, now, followed by a doctor who, immediately upon reaching your side, proceeds to shine a light in your eyes and asks you to complete all sorts of short tests while the team looks on.

“Now, Agent Y/L/N, Dr. Reid informed me that you seem to be having some memory issues, which is normal,” the doctor assures you, “especially with the head trauma you endured. So, tell me what you can remember and we’ll go from there,” he says with a helpful smile.

Fuck. What do you remember?

“Well…” you trail off, trying to pin-point an exact moment. “I remember Emily—Agent Prentiss’—funeral because it was six months ago, but apparently—” your eyes slide over the rest of the team, “—apparently, it was more like four years ago,” you finish slowly.

“And that’s as recent as you can remember?” the doctor pushes. You nod your head. “Well, Agent Y/L/N, it seems that you have post-traumatic retrograde amnesia, which isn’t a surprise, as I said before. My guess is that it’s temporary, and that you’ll recover your memories in time.”

“Any ideas how long?” Emily speaks up, carefully looking at your face.

“With cases such as these, there isn’t a definite timeline or standard procedure for memory recovery,” the doctor explains. “It may help to look at photos or videos and tell stories to try and help Agent Y/L/N heal quicker, but the brain is tricky,” and with that wonderful statement, the doctor turns and exits, leaving you and your team staring at each other, processing the fact that you don’t know when you’ll get your memories of the last four freakin’ years back.

“So, from the research I’ve done, it seems that—” Reid is cut off by the door flying open and Aaron Hotchner, your Unit Chief, bursting into the room with a concerned look on his face wearing a hoodie and jeans.

Morgan tries to grab his shoulder, but Hotch shakes him off as he walks right up to your bedside and grabs your hand. Holy shit. Heat rises to your cheeks instantly and you think your heart might have actually skipped a beat but, you can’t help it, you’ve had a crush on Hotch for ages and he’s holding your hand. But you don’t remember a time when Hotch was so forward in showing concern for one of his agents.

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here when you woke up, Sweetheart—” you’re pretty sure you’re dreaming because Hotch has never called you Sweetheart. Ever. You’ve also never seen him in anything other than a suit. “—Jessica called because Jack has the flu and then he wanted to talk to me and—”

“Hotch!” Morgan all but yells, interrupting Hotch’s update on Jack, as you stare pointedly at his hand, still holding yours, trying to control the redness growing steadily stronger in your cheeks. What the hell.

“Hotch,” Morgan states, softer this time, “The last thing Y/L/N remembers clearly is Prentiss’ funeral.”

You look up with a weak approximation of a smile, and watch Hotch’s face shift as he comprehends what Morgan said.

“That was years ago,” he says slowly, face hardening into a look you’ve seen too many times when he tries to separate himself from the information he’s received.

Looking down at you, you can’t tell what he’s thinking, so you divert your eyes to his hand in yours. Once he notices this, he gently lets go and you know it’s silly, but you almost reach out for it again. Who knows the next time Hotch will want to hold your hand?

“So you don’t…” he doesn’t finish his question, which leaves you even more confused. Don’t what…?

“Umm. If it’s happened in the last four-ish years, then umm… Then I probably don’t remember it,” you say quietly, apologetically. “Sir,” you add on quickly, not wanting to forgo formalities even if your memory isn’t what it’s supposed to be.

However, instead of nodding, like you thought he would, Aaron Hotchner looks sad which confuses you even more.

“Aaron,” Rossi begins slowly, “the doctor said that talking about what’s happened since then may help Y/N’s memory come back.” Hotch looks up, almost relieved. “So why don’t you tell her something that’s happened since Prentiss’ funeral.”

And with that, Hotch takes a breath before reaching across your body to your other hand and holding it up. Not quite sure what’s happening, you allow him to hold your left hand up in your line of vision and that’s when you notice a fucking wedding ring. On your hand. Which Hotch is holding.

“I’m married?” you screech, looking at the team, who are now all trying not to laugh for some reason. “Who am I married to? Holy shit, what?” you continue looking around. Morgan and Prentiss look like they’ll break into outright laughter any minute. What’s going on?

Looking helplessly to Hotch, who is suspiciously quiet, you don’t have to repeat your question before he is carefully letting go of your left hand to hold his own up next to it and since when did Hotch wear a wedding band? Until you notice the striking similarities between the ring on your hand, and the one on your boss. What the actual fuck.

“We’re married?” you say, whipping your head to the side—ouch—to stare at Hotch, who is looking a little more amused than worried. “What? When? I just…” you can’t even finish your train of thought because your head is spinning so fast.

“Is it really that much of a surprise, Princess?” Derek chimes in. “I mean, you guys have been in love with each other forever,” and with that, he and Prentiss dissolve into a fit of laughter, which they try to smother, but you’re too busy taking in this very new and very interesting life development.

At some point in the last couple years, you married Hotch. Which means he knows you like him. And he likes you. You dated Hotch and now you’re fucking married. And you can’t remember any of it.

“…I don’t remember it…” you say sadly, softly and the laughter ceases.

Running a hand through his hair, Hotch takes a step back and shrugs, a small, reassuring smile on his face.

“We’ll figure it out, Sweetheart—” your stomach erupts into butterflies, “—we always do.”

With a sigh, you sink back into the pillows on your bed and stare at the ceiling, head throbbing worse than before thanks to all the new information.

“I just…” you pause to think about your current dilemma. “I just don’t know where to start with all this…Getting my memory back,” you look to Hotch and then the team, unsure of what to do.

“Well, the doctor did say that photos and videos might help. I’d be willing to recount every conversation we’ve had since Emily’s funeral, if you want, including the ones that you weren’t a part of, but were about you or a case,” Reid offers with a grin, and your heart melts.

Slowly shaking your head, you answer, “Thanks but maybe later, Spence. I’m still stuck on the whole I’m-married-to-my-boss thing right now.”

“Trust me Princess,” Derek laughs “I’m pretty sure all of us could tell you about how everything went down like a damn movie.”

“Yeah…” JJ continues with a fond shake of her head, “You guys weren’t very subtle about it.”

Sneaking a look out of the corner of your eye, you catch Hotch blushing and staring down at his shoes before he also sneaks a look at you, meeting your eyes.

“See?” Derek’s voice breaks your gaze. “This is exactly what I was talking about. You guys weren’t subtle and still aren’t,” rolling his eyes, he laughs a little and you can’t help but smile.

“At least they’re married this time around,” Rossi supplies. “No more ‘secret’ glances and yearning,” he says with such contempt you can’t help but laugh as Hotch—Aaron? — lets out a small chuckle of his own.

“Now I just need to remember how we got here,” you say, feeling a little more at ease. Slowly, you reach for Hotch’s left hand, studying the ring the matches your own. “Remember us,” you continue, just to him, and the smile that overtakes his face is the best thing you’ve seen since waking up.

“You weren’t wrong, Morgan,” comes Emily’s voice from the end of your bed. “This is just like a movie. Ugh. But don’t worry, Y/N, we’ll help you sort this out.”

“And I know just the woman for the job,” Morgan adds with a mischievous smirk which immediately makes you wonder about whatever it is he has planned.

“Now as much as I’d love to watch the two lovebirds gaze into each other’s eyes, I actually have plans,” Rossi states, looking down at his watch. “So, I’ll be back tomorrow. Have a good night, Y/N,” he says before waving to the rest of the team and leaving.

The rest of the team makes their own excuses to leave, and you can’t help but feel like Morgan and Prentiss have concocted some sort of scheme to “help” you get your memories back.

Running a hand over your face, you sigh. What now? The sound of someone clearing their throat makes you look up and realize that Hotch hadn’t left with the others, but was instead standing near the foot of your bed, looking somewhat anxious.

“I ummm… I was planning on spending the night here to make sure you were okay, but umm…” he trails off, unsure.

“But since I have no memory of us being together you think it’s weird…?” you ask gently.

“Yeah,” he answers in a sigh. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable by being here, especially because I know how frustrating and confusing this must be for you…”

“Hotch,” you start, but he can’t hide his wince when you call him that. “Aaron,” you try again. “Yes, this is incredibly confusing and frustrating because Emily should be dead and I didn’t think you had feelings for me at all,” you pause and see him smile, just a bit, “But I’d really like it if you stayed here. With me. Because—” you take a deep breath. “—Because you make me feel safe, Aaron, and I need that right now,” you say gently, not quite sure where the confidence came from, but Aaron’s eyes soften and his smile grows bigger as his shoulders drop in relief. Worth it.

“Then I’ll stay,” he says, and you can’t help the heat that once again rises in your cheeks as he continues to look at you.

You guys are married, dammit. Pull it together.

Averting your gaze, you turn your attention to getting more comfortable in your bed and decide to fuss with the placement of your pillows because damn was your back starting to hurt, but Aaron beats you to it. Within ten seconds of arranging the pillows behind you, he has them perfect.

“How…?” you start to question, but he just raises his eyebrows. “Right. Married,” you say with a shake of your head.

Aaron finally sits in the chair next to your bed and reaches, almost absentmindedly, for your hand before catching himself and stilling. You can see the fight in his mind—he wants to comfort you and himself, but with your memory, he doesn’t quite know where your boundaries are. Taking pity on him, you grab his hand yourself, weaving your fingers together so he knows it was on purpose. Okay so you really just wanted to hold his hand again, but you’re married! You’re allowed. He takes a deep breath and leans back in the chair, turning his head to really look at you.

“How’s your head?” he asks, brow furrowed in what you’ve come to understand is genuine concern.

You pause and consider for a moment.

“Not terrible, but not great,” you say slowly. “It’s like there’s a fog in my mind that I can’t see through. I know I’m missing stuff, but I just don’t know what.”

Aaron gently squeezes your hand, but doesn’t speak yet.

“I want to know what brought Emily back, how we happened, what it was that gave me this fucking injury, I just…” with an exasperated huff, you collect yourself. “I just want to know.”

“Well, Emily should be the one to tell you her part of the story, and as for us,” he gives you a smile “it’s a longer answer, at least for me, so that will have to wait—Sorry, Sweetheart,” he says when you pout. “However, I can tell you about what landed you in the hospital. How does that sound?”

“It’s a start,” you tease, and yes Aaron smiles wider and rolls his eyes.

“We were chasing an unsub, and Garcia had tracked him to a warehouse not too far from Quantico. We went there and—” his voice wavers. You squeeze his hand. “—and the unsub had set explosives around the perimeter of the building. I guess you got too close to him when trying to talk him down and he triggered the whole set.” Aaron sighs, and his eyes are glazed over like he’s reliving this—which he probably is—and there’s nothing you can really do besides let him take his time.

“You weren’t right by any of them, but you were thrown back and had hit the ground before I could even yell at you to stop—not that you would have listened,” he says pointedly with a watery laugh. “You just laid there, Morgan and I carried you over to the medics as soon as the dust settled and they took you away as we cleared the rest of the scene.”

“And the unsub?”

“He didn’t survive the explosion. As soon as we figured that out, we left it to the local PD and crime scene techs.” He looks at you softly. “We came straight here after that.”

“How long was I out before today,” you ask lightly, curiously.

“Three days. Dave had to convince me to go home and shower on the second day.” He looks down before sneaking a sideways glance at you.

“Well I’m glad he did,” you tease, scrunching your nose.

“And I’m glad you’re awake, Sweetheart,” he replies, squeezing your hand.

You laugh and look away before mumbling, “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to that.”

“Get used to what?” he waits a second. “Sweetheart?” Motherfucker. He knows what he’s doing.

“That! I woke up convinced you didn’t have feelings for me at all,” you say with a glare, “and now I know we’re married and you keep being so nice and understanding and calling me Sweetheart and I just don’t know how to deal with all of this!” you finish in a huff.

“I just feel bad that I can’t remember this, us” you add, gesturing between the two of you. “I’m trying and there’s just—” you make a frustrated noise and flop back to stare at the ceiling. “And my head still kind of hurts,” you add softly, almost pouting.

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Aaron whispers. He clears his throat before continuing. “You’ll get your memories back,” he leans forward to stroke some hair off your forehead. “And until then, you know the team and I will do what we can to catch you up and help you remember.”

You push your head further into his hand with a sigh. He runs his hand through your hair a few times before pulling back and you almost whine. You yawn instead. Settling down, you tug the blanket up higher across your chest and turn to face Aaron as he also gets comfortable. He turns on the small television in your room and at some point, you fall asleep holding his hand.

---

You wake to the sound of the door opening, followed by the unmistakable click-clack of heels worn by none other than Penelope Garcia.  

“Rise and shine! Time to regain your memory, lovely Y/N,” she sings, coming to a stop by the side of your bed as you roll over with a yawn.

“Pen—” you groan. “Let me sleep. Please.”

“Oh no, my little profiler. Do you have your memory back?” You shake your head. “Then we need to work on that! And don’t you dare tell me no; my wonderful Derek Morgan and I were up all night making this for you,”

You raise your eyebrows.

“Sadly, not like that. But, we compiled a presentation-slash-video montage for you about what you’ve missed!”

That catches your attention.

“Wha--? How? Penelope where did the footage come from?” you ask, more awake now.

“Well, I may or may not have used security cam footage for a lot of it, but that’s neither here nor there, so, without further ado, I present to you: your life for the past four-ish years!” and with that, she somehow connects her tablet to the TV and you see a picture of the whole team; Penelope then produces a remote from the depths of her purse and then proceeds to the next slide.

Which is a photo of you. And Aaron. Standing by the coffee machine in the office and smiling at each other, clearly unaware that the moment was being documented. The image is embellished with what must be close to fifty moving, sparkly hearts, obviously done by Garcia.

“First thing’s first,” she starts with a flourish. “Your husband!” and as if on cue, Aaron walks into the room, cup of coffee in hand. Much to your surprise, Aaron just rounds your bed to sit in the same chair you assume he fell asleep in, watching the screen.

“What is happening,” you say softly to yourself, looking from Aaron to Garcia and back.

“The doctor said photos and videos might help restore your memory, so who better to put something together than Garcia?” Hotch answers dryly, a small smile flashing across his face. “The rest of the team should be here shortly,” he says directly to Garcia.

“Oh good. I always work better with an audience,” she replies as you continue to process just what the hell is happening since you woke up approximately five minutes ago.

Within a few minutes, your hospital room is overrun with the rest of the team. Sitting, standing, leaning wherever they can find the space to view Penelope’s presentation with you in the middle of it all.

“Don’t you people have jobs?” you grumble.

“C’mon, Princess. Who better to help you remember the last few years than us?” Derek says with a cheeky grin that makes you roll your eyes.

You turn your gaze to Aaron and find that he’s already looking at you in concern.

“If you really don’t want all of us here we can leave,” he says just loud enough for you to hear.

“I just…” you take a moment to try and collect your thoughts. “I guess I just don’t know how to feel about all of this, but you’re all here so— “

“So here we go!” Penelope cheerfully finishes your sentence before turning back to the screen. “As I was saying before, part one of Operation Get Y/N’s Memories Back is all about—drumroll please—our very own Unit Chief, a.k.a. Hotch, a.k.a. loving husband to our very own Agent Y/L/N.”

With a shake of your head, purposefully ignoring the way Derek and Emily are whooping and whistling, you settle in and gesture for Penelope to continue. God, let’s hope this works.

---

It doesn’t work.

Fuck.

Three almost four hours later and nothing has changed for you. However, it’s a lovely opportunity for some team bonding and creating new memories, but you’re still disappointed. It’s not for lack of trying, though. Penelope did a wonderful job of pulling together a presentation-slash-video montage of your life, complete with titles such as ‘Your lovely husband,’ ‘The Miraculous Life, Death, and Subsequent Resurrection of Emily Prentiss,’ and even ‘Badass BAU Babies,’ which was a collection of team photos and news clips of cases you guys had closed in the past few years.

The whole team had gotten a kick out of each section, especially the last one, as Penelope had spared no one in her quest to help your memory; ugly selfies sent in the BAU group chat, embarrassing footage of you tripping up (and down) the stairs to the bullpen—courtesy of the security cameras, Reid doing physics magic and narrowly missing Rossi’s coffee cup, it was all there. But nothing worked, there was no magical ah ha moment where everything came rushing back. If anything, it really was like watching a movie; it didn’t feel like you were the one is all of these clips and photos. Not even Reid’s commentary made you feel any closer than before to recovering your memories.

It wasn’t all bad, though. Penelope had a veritable stockpile of photos of you and Aaron, ranging from the office, to cases, to the occasional night out with the team. Your engagement announcement, wedding photos, freakin’ everything on the two of you and yet, nothing seemed to make a difference to your brain.

The photo on the screen was one of you and Aaron on a case. You were tucked under his arm, snowflakes visible in your hair and his as you look up and laugh at something he said while he just smiles gently down at you. Penelope had put hearts over both your eyes.

“Actual heart eyes! I had to! You guys are so cute!” she basically squealed when the photo came up.

“What did I tell you,” Rossi said teasingly, “Yearning.”

Prentiss and Morgan hadn’t stopped laughing for this entire segment, with JJ and Reid occasionally joining in if there was something exceptionally ridiculous Penelope had included, like fucking heart eyes.

A hand covering your own makes you realize you had spaced out, and you look down to see that it’s Aaron’s hand, wedding band catching the light.

“Anything, Sweetheart?” he asks in a low voice, carefully watching your face.

You shake your head. “It’s like it’s someone else’s life, but I know it’s mine; you’ve told me it’s mine, there’s photographic evidence that it’s mine!” you say in a huff. “It just doesn’t feel like it’s mine,” you whisper, voice breaking at the end. Tears gather in your eyes and you bite your lip to stop it from shaking as you desperately try and control your overwhelming emotions. You can hear the team in the background, strategizing new ways to help you, but Aaron’s face hovers in front of your own, drawing your attention.

“It’s okay,” he says lightly, stroking your cheek with his thumb.

“No, it’s not,” you insist as a few tears make their way down your face. “It’s not, Aaron. What if this is it? What if I just don’t get my memories back?”

Letting out a long sigh, Aaron raises your hand to his lips and kisses your palm before folding your hand into his.

“You will. I know you will,” he says with such conviction you might just believe him if it weren’t for the way he rapidly blinks to keep his own tears at bay.

“Yeah, Princess.” Morgan chimes in from somewhere across the room. “We’ll figure this out, you know we will.”

And with that, you see something click into place in Aaron’s eyes and suddenly, he’s looking at you in such a way that your heart picks up—thanks, heart monitor.

“Aaron…?” you ask cautiously.

“Princess,” he says it so simply, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. You only have time to raise an eyebrow at him before—

Oh.

Kissing Aaron Hotchner is something you could definitely get used to. His hand comes up to cradle your face as he gently moves his lips against yours. You sigh and can feel his smile against your mouth before he’s tugging your face closer, tilting your head just so and—

There.

It’s like opening a window to let in a breeze. Soft and sure, filling the space in a way that’s all-encompassing without being suffocating.

Like snowflakes falling and settling on his black jacket, like Aaron down on one knee sliding your engagement ring on your finger while you smile so much it feels like your face will break. It’s leaving cups of coffee on his desk during late nights in the office. It’s playing soccer with Jack as Aaron smiles and cheers both of you on. It’s being in bed late at night, falling asleep in the comfort provided by the man you love. Your wedding vows, promising to love him forever.

And you know.

With a gasp, you pull Aaron closer, kiss him deeper, harder, moving your lips more frantically against his. I remember I remember I remember and you think he gets it because he pulls back and looks at you with so much hope it almost breaks your heart.

“When I said I’d love you forever, Aaron Hotchner, I meant it.”

And his face breaks into the biggest smile you’ve ever seen as he laughs in disbelief before capturing your lips with his again, returning the urgency you had kissed him with just moments ago.

Someone clears their throat and you pull apart, smiles obvious on both your faces as you turn to the team who are looking somewhat confused.

“Would you mind enlightening us as to why you two are suddenly acting like teenagers?” Rossi asks, eyebrows raised.

“Well,” Aaron starts, grinning in your direction, “It would seem that— “

“Nuh uh. No way,” Derek interrupts him. “Are you seriously about to say that you kissed her and she magically remembered?”

You can’t help but laugh at his disbelief because what the hell and nod, unable to speak through the giddiness overtaking your body. You remember.

“Ohmygod! You guys!!” Penelope squeals before launching herself into your arms for a hug which she promptly pulls Aaron into as well; he doesn’t protest.

“What made you do that, Hotch?” Reid asks curiously once Penelope has let you and Aaron go. “Did you know it would work?”

“Princess,” Aaron says with a nod towards Morgan. “In Jack’s storybooks, a kiss always wakes the Princess so she and her prince can live happily ever after.”

Okay that’s adorable and you can’t help but aww with the rest of the team at Aaron’s confession.

“Happily ever after, huh?” you say, tugging on his hand. “Who knew you were such a sap, Hotchner?”

Rolling his eyes, Aaron just smiles. “Wasn’t it obvious from Garcia’s presentation? I’ve been in love with you forever, Sweetheart. And besides, it worked, didn’t it?” he says with a smug smile. 

You pull him down for a short kiss before moving back just enough to murmur “My Prince Charming.”

“I can’t believe you guys,” you turn to see Morgan shaking his head. “A literal fuckin’ fairytale,” and then he’s laughing and the whole team, you and Aaron included, are laughing with him because yeah this is pretty surreal.

“I can’t believe you thought I was a ghost!” Emily says once the laughter has died down, her arms crossed in mock-anger.

“Can you blame me?” you retort. “The last thing I remember was burying you and suddenly you’re here? Nope. No way. Ghost. Only explanation.”

“I have to say, Y/L/N, I’m glad you’re back, if only to stop Aaron’s sad puppy-dog eyes every time you called him ‘Hotch,’” Rossi shakes his head. “I don’t know how much more yearning I could take.”

“Hey! Be nice,” JJ admonishes, swatting Rossi’s shoulder. “I think it’s sweet.”

“Yeah guys,” you echo. “Be nice! Don’t think I forgot you two,” you say, leveling Morgan and Prentiss with glares, “and all your laughter when I couldn’t remember that my husband and I were married!”

“Oh c’mon, Princess,” Morgan groans. “It was pretty funny. You were trying so hard not to look completely in love with your husband.”

“In my defense,” you start, “I didn’t know that you guys already knew how much I love Aaron, so excuse me for trying to hide my love,” you say with a sniff.

“Well, it was pretty obvious. Whenever you looked at him or he grabbed your hand, the heart monitor would register an increase in your heart rate by—” Reid starts to ramble but your laughter cuts him off.

“I get it, I get it,” you continue through your laughter. “I’m very in love with Aaron, even when I think it’s a secret, but as Penelope’s presentation so eloquently demonstrated, I’m not subtle and neither is he.”

Aaron leans over to kiss your cheek as the rest of the team continues into a conversation about Penelope’s presentation and how the hell she collected all those photos and videos in one day.

With the attention no longer on you—for now—you smile at Aaron, who smiles right back. He slumps back in his chair with a sigh, and you can’t help but pull him back closer to you.

“I love you,” you say kissing the back of his hand.

“I love you more, Sweetheart,” he replies softly.

Yeah, this is happily ever after.

[blookmallow]

rating spirit halloween’s new animatronics for 2021

or at least what’s showing as New Arrivals on the site for me. looks like we got 15 new arrivals listed here and im HYPE about them so here we go

the caretaker

pretty standard reaper character with a Gravedigger theme to it. hes... fine? nothing about this particularly stands out to me, but i dont dislike it at all. i like his gravestone. would be good for a graveyard set. i guess ill give him... 6.5/10

mr. dark

at first glance he also just looks like a standard reaper character (or voldemort. he definitely looks like voldemort now that i think about it) but it turns out he SPRINGS UP RIDICULOUSLY TALL LIKE A CURSED WACKY INFLATABLE TUBE MAN and the spring motion in the video is actually really fucking fast so, while this isn’t a lot different from other jumpscare animatronics, i gotta give him credit bc i guarantee this would have scared the fuck outta me in person. according to the site he’s almost 9 feet tall at his full height 

i expected him to jump out and scream but i did not expect. That. i feel like if you put him up on a stage or something to make him loom over people even more he’d be very menacing indeed. would also be really good if you put him behind something so you don’t see him until he's suddenly There

i like him, 8/10 springy spook man 

click for more 

grave grabber

pretty much just a zombie but he’s cute i like him. i like the green eyes. i dont know what it is about him in motion but the video makes him kind of endearing to me for some reason and i dont know why. 6/10

ophelia

at first for some reason i thought the monster’s name was ophelia but i think that’s supposed to be the name of the victim? i think the idea here is “girl haunted by a Nightmare” but the fact that the monster itself is so small and doesn’t actually have a body for the most part makes this unintentionally hilarious to me 

like. it. it’s so small. it’s just a little shoulder demon. it’s so cute 

psst. hey do we have any more cheetos

anyway i like how the girl’s eyes move back and forth but the sounds she makes are uncomfortable and she just looks so. stiff and solid and there doesn’t seem to be any movement at all other than her eyes and the monster peeking out so it’s just kind of weird to look at. it’s an interesting concept but the execution is just strange and unintentionally hilarious. 7/10 bc i still think its really funny 

someone should buy this and mod it into chrona and ragnarok 

harriet hustle

WE DID IT KIDS WE FINALLY GOT A FEMALE CLOWN ANIMATRONIC im so happy i could cry i wish my store had her set up i want to meet her  

i love how they have her hanging upside down like this, it makes it so much more visually interesting than the figures that just kinda stand there looking spooky, even though she doesn’t really Do much (she just swings and her head moves around a little, just laughs, doesn’t have spoken lines) 

i love her outfit i love her hair shes SO cute i love this little murder gremlin i love her i love her 

im still waiting on spirit to give us a female clown figure that isn’t “creepy little girl” (ive commented before on how their only female figures tend to be either the Old Hag or the Creepy Little Girl and not a lot else) but i absolutely love this all the same 20/10

this one is fun too because we also have: 

henry hustle

according to the description he’s actually harriet’s dad!! we have an evil clown father and daughter duo here and im LIVING for it

i dont think ive ever seen spirit do characters that are related to each other like this that’s so cute,

apparently his wife/harriet’s mother left them and ran off with the ringmaster. he’s a single father clown trying to raise his evil daughter clown and i support him wholeheartedly

there doesn’t seem to be any more animatronics on this storyline, we don’t have the mother here and the only ringmaster animatronic they have is the rotten ringmaster who was released previously, but i doubt he’s the homewrecker ringmaster in question. he Could Be. imagine if your wife left you for That. we dont even know if henry’s wife was also a clown or not. spirit halloween clown lore going on here

anyway i absolutely LOVE this clown, he does something INCREDIBLY STARTLING AND UNEXPECTED which i dont want to spoil for you. go watch his video and see what he does its great 

my absolute favorite type of halloween animatronic is the “does something completely unexpected” category and this one is ALSO a clown and a GOOD clown at that

and he’s got this great vintage clown style i really like, i love scary clowns like this that actually look like they could believably be a real guy and not just some kind of mutant Clown Monster 

and hes got cards!! card suit motif!!! i love it i love him this is a great clown 20/10 for him too

w. raith 

we have this one at my local store and listen to me. im completely obsessed with this ghost

it’s pretty much just a ghost but it’s SUCH A GOOD ghost. especially in this photo here with proper spooky lighting and everything. i would absolutely LOVE to see this in a haunt attraction, it looks SO good even in bright store lighting. i feel like this under the right lights and in the right environment could look SO fuckign cool  

the shredded rag look!!! the ethereal glow!! the weird jellyfishy movement!!! the classic wooOoO oO o o ooo noises!! this may perhaps be the ideal ghost. it is without flaw. a perfect specimen. i fuckign LOVE this ghost i want it so badly but i do not have the space or the money for this thing 15/10 w. raith my beloved. my true love. maybe one day 

buzzsaw

at first i was slightly disappointed to see that this guy didn’t have an actual name, but then in the description apparently his name is Bill “Buzzsaw” Jackson and his backstory is he tried to be a wrestler but it didnt go very well so he grafted weapons in place of his hands. i guess. you know, to be better at wrestling. i dont really understand it and i definitely would not have gone with “disgraced former wrestler” as the concept for this guy  

but anyway we have mr jackson at my store right now, he’s Big, i like him. he doesn’t really move very fast and doesn’t jump at you, he just kinda swings his saw around. for some reason he just seems friendly to me and i dont know why. makes me think of like an uncle dressed up for halloween rather than an actual murderer guy. i dont know i cant explain it but i like him hes my friend 8/10

wacky mole

this guy’s also at my store this year, i didn’t know his name was wacky mole fsdgjsdg

he’s listed as a new arrival, but i thought i remembered seeing him before, and the description says he’s a returning fan favorite, so. i guess this is a re-release 

anyway pretty standard Scary Monster Clown. his teeth look like candy corn. i like it but i think they should just Be candy corn. i like his colorscheme and his silly giant buttons. light up eyes are always a nice touch. he doesnt really stand out but hes overall a pretty good clown. 7/10

grim

good ol’ classic skeleton. he’s pretty nicely modeled though and i highly recommend watching the video for this guy because he moves REALLY well for a spirit animatronic, he’s got a way wider range of movement than most of them do and his head moves really nicely. one of the benefits of a skeleton animatronic is you don’t have to deal with lip movement, so his jaw movements match with his lines a lot more realistically. i like the animated glowing eyes too, it really gives him a lot of personality. he’s really interesting to watch. like, it’s just a skeleton, but it’s a really really good skeleton, so, 8/10 

BEETLEJUICE!!

i love love love franchise character animatronics and spirit has so much great beetlejuice stuff this seems well suited to them but looking at it............. hm. hm

he just looks so. stiff and his face comes across like, deer caught in the headlights to me. it Does Not look very natural but it looks slightly better in motion (he just swivels from side to side and says a few phrases but it somehow looks less. shellshocked when he’s moving) 

maybe not the greatest execution but maybe he looks better in person and im still hype to see him so 8/10 regardless 

night stalker

we have this guy at my store too, im still not really sure what’s going on with his arms (did he just rip loose from them and leave them behind? did someone do this to him? i dont know) but i love a good spooky scarecrow. love his Wiggles. hes a pretty good boy. 6.5/10

here we have another pennywise, it pretty much just pops out at you, but it’s still pretty good. i like the full size one they had before better, but this one’s slightly cheaper and would be easier to integrate into a haunted house attraction since he comes with a built in set piece. it looks good but doesn’t do much. 7.5/10 i guess 

GHOSTFACE!!!!

FUCK YES I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

please. please spirit halloween set him up in my store so i can see him

anyway hes got kind of the same issue beetlejuice has where the figure just. looks kind of stiff, and he looks more like a spooky ghost decoration than like, A Person. he doesnt seem to have any lines or anything either, he just kinda pops out. but then again i guess whenever we see ghostface in person in the movies he doesn’t usually talk anyway. i dont really know how id make this better but it seems a little underwhelming somehow. still hype to see it though. 7/10 i guess 

now if we could just get a jack torrance and a bela lugosi dracula id be content 

i would LOVE to see Red from Us but i doubt they’d do one. my other horror beloved is norman bates but i know if they made one of him it’d just be him in a dress waving a knife around (not that i wouldn’t still be hype to see him, but, y’know) (anyway. tangent. moving on) 

mr. howle 

it’s. a werewolf. he howls. that’s....... about it 

it’s a very nice looking werewolf, it’s a well designed figure and definitely looks very imposing, but it’s... just a werewolf. there’s not really anything particularly interesting or creative here. its a perfectly good werewolf. i dont have anything to say about this. 6.5/10 

i also just am not a werewolf person so maybe someone out there who has a greater appreciation for werewolves might like him more 

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom 14-20 thoughts!! I finished up s1 :D these last few eps were actually really really good!!!

-did. did tucker really just say esperanto was a dead language only spoken as a secret code between geeks. google says around 100,000 people actively speak it. oh my god...it being an auxiliary language doesn't mean its 'just for geeks to speak in code' ...it helps bridge gaps between people who don't have a language in common...

-danny really isn't pulling punches when it comes to fighting the ghost-cop possessed people huh. like he SLAMMED KWAN INTO THE CONCRETE SO HARD. HE THREW PAULINA INTO A BILLBOARD. will that...I mean it WOULD carry over to their bodies non-possessed, right? like if the ghost piloting their bodies gets hurt?? itd be so upsetting to be possessed, lose time, then wake up covered in bruises (and possibly, broken bones??) real horror movie stuff im sure wont be addressed in any way

-tuckers parents seem nice! I like them :)

-WULF IS CUTE AND I FEEL BAD. im so glad the gang realized he was only causing trouble bc of the shock collar walker put on him and helped. also, him wearing that big hoodie with the hood on, and thinking its subtle. we can tell youre still a giant wolfie :) THEN GETTING SUCKED INTO THE PORTAL AAAAH :( anxiously waiting to see Him Again....

-DANNY BLASTING HIS PARENTS THINKING THEY WERE OVERSHADOWED LMFAO GET THEIR ASSES. maddie marking how many ghosts she gets with lipstick tallies on the side of her portal gun? kindaaa iconic tho. (ALSO, SHE WAS LIKE, 2 FT AWAY FROM HIM RIGHT AFTER SHE TRIED TO SHOOT HIM. HOW DO YOU NOT RECONINZE YOUR OWN SON??? like sure, he might have diff hair/eye colors. but like, if one of my family members dyed their hair, and was wearing contacts, its not like id be like 'wHO IS THIS STRANGER!!!' ...he still has all his facial features!! same everything!!! I hate it here)

-paulina being #1 girl realizing danny's a friendly ghost immediately. smart queen. lancer and kwan ran away right after he made this sweet baby face at them:

which is hilarious.

-ok. im not saying his bullying is JUSTIFIED, but. dash looked so pleased with the (cute!) poster he just painted, and danny comes thru the wall and spills paint on his nice letterman jacket. his anger is justified maybe 65% of the time so far...(not the way he handles it, but STILL.) at least lancer is stepping in!! and them making a silly little bet was...cute?? until dash pulled out his GROSS UNDERWEAR AND SAID DANNY WOULD HAVE TO EAT THEM???? WHAT THE FUCK MAN. TUCKER WAS SO RIGHT ITS FUCKING WEIRD TO CARRY THOSE AROUND EWWW. THIS KID IS UNWELL. lancer was right, his animatronic setup was SUPER IMPRESSIVE?? hes actually pretty creative. danny meanwhile is stealing the fright knight's design...I hope dash is taking art classes or smth with his sports

-fright knight is the most bestest ghost so far i LOVE THAT DESIGN. I am biased towards knights, and characters with swords, but he fucks so severely. and should sue danny for copyright infringement for stealing his design for his haunted house. if some 14 yr old broke into MY house and stole MY sword, id also be pissed. his evil winged unicorn rules too with its FANGS. and he just CAN SHOVE THE PORTAL OPEN WITH HIS HANDS??? is he the strongest ghost weve seen so far? idk but hes my fav. SOUL SHREDDER IS SUCH A COOL SWORD NAME TOO. ANY NAMED SWORD ALSO FUCKS. 'flaming bedsheets of DEATH' funny king. ALSO he was polite to dash and tucker when just asking for directions and telling tucker 'oh maybe, just a suggestion, maybe be nicer to me and be more respectful :)' I LOOOVE HIM.

-I noticed this in the Ember ep, but jazz has an electric guitar in her room!! talent musical queen!! its cool to see hobbies just in the bg.

-fright knight's murder castle reminds me of the booby trapped murder castle in zexal!! another supposedly 'for kids' show with murder/trap castles! we love that. if you are a dp fan reading this, give yugioh zexal a try. its also got 13-14 year old protags and involves (alien) ghosts. the cardgame is just a vessel for the plot, which is really good. (I just want more people to watch my fav yugioh, man)

-danny. with a SWORD.

-danny doesnt NEED TO WIN this contest, dash didnt STEAL HIS DESIGNS AND STEAL A SWORD. he also got excited to hear lancer got sent to a dimension with his worst fears too just so he could win the contest? DANNY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! BRO MAYBE YOURE 14 AND HAVENT FULLY DEVOLPED YOUR WHOLE BRAIN YET, BUT...THATS FUCKED. this kid casually says the most deranged things, I do worry for my spooky son. once again, therapy needed. that judo toss was great tho. I wonder if he actually did pick up some martial arts stuff from his mom?

-danny can fly 112 mph!!! thats so fast! I love the lil montage of him and his friends testing his abilities and stuff, very cute and a good way to showcase what he can do by now and how much more proficient he's gotten from ep 1!!! I'm sure he's going to get more abilities :)

-im glad...maddie's at least TRYING this ep. I do feel for her because her husband is a man baby. but the fact it took 16 episodes to get a kinda semblance of any kind of real concern or attempts at bonding. hmm. jack's 'BACK OFF SHES A MINOR' @ the ghost trying to attack jazz. also was very funny. and him wanting to make an action figure of her? are the parents redeeming themselves to me? slightly. they gotta Work Harder

-THE GHOST. IS FLYING. THE PLANE.

-fenton machete. but she doesnt carry a PHONE??? ???

-I mean I expected vlad when you namedrop him earlier in the ep, and also the title card picture, and dalv corp being fucking vlad backwards. but seeing him just pull up on a golf cart made me bust out laughing. WITH the gift baskets prepared. why wouldnt you at least be suspicious. also, if he wants danny to be his lil sonboy, why is he so fucking malicious?? dude you are going about this in such a bad way. stop it. get some help.

-maddie not even hesitating to drag danny out. fucking good. danny is so right, go on the internet to date. get a cat. how do you spend...how many years?? has it been since college?? at least 20, right, since the parents/vlad are in their 40s? hung up on ONE girl. my god, man. incel drama queen. her kung fu IS impressive, but dude. 'we both know hes a creep' SO right. it sucks but they do need a phone and shit being in the middle of NOWHERE. also, just stealing his helicopter was great. <3

-'you must be exhausted carrying the weight of that mistake you made years ago' 'well we all make mistakes. maybe I'll make one now!' WHY DID THIS EXHCHANGE SEND ME. AND VLAD WITH THE BREATH SPRAY EWWW BITCH. 'OLD BAIT BREATH' SOO RIGHT. both danny and his mom playing him HAHAH hes so dumb. or rather, I think he thinks with his emotions too too much and is...actually pretty gullible? lmao he believed danny was ready to give in SO fast. (which is sad hes that hopeful, like you have SO MUCH MONEY YOU COULD EASILY GET ANOTHER GIRL WHO HAS A KID. AND WOULD WANT TO BE WITH YOU AND BE SUPPORTED. GET OVER THIS (1) WOMAN ALREADY IM GETTING SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT AAAAH)

-GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR. it was also in the title card, but I still got very excited. we love bears here

-SAM'S BAT SWIMSUIT COVERUP!!! her outfits are simply iconic.

-'i'd tell you to go to the mens room, but I don't think you qualify' top paulina transphobic moments. :( and him wearing a tanktop to the swim park? hmmm! (actually I think she was overshadowed by then, so, KITTY top 10 transphobic moments??)

-kitty just piloting paulina around makes me feel SO bad tho, paulina's gonna wake up and be like 'wtf do you mean I was dating this rando' like youre leading danny on to make johnny jealous, and also just POSSESSING POOR PAULINA. dude take your relationship problems ELSEWHERE. last time we saw them, they seemed like such a cute couple!! wtf johnny!! I mean, she sucks for trying to make him jealous, he sucks for looking at other girls...maybe they need a break, but Not Like This. or, you know, just. better communication...

-and the A-listers having a full packet and a stamp system. who organizes this. kwan fucking owning being the new danny though, this is hysterical. THE TUCKER/KWAN FLOWER FIELD TWIRL. UNIRONICALLY ADORABLE. and him giving it his all for the poetry slam. bless his HEARTTTT.

-Star owns. actually, all of the extra characters are shining this ep and I love it.

-INVISO-BILL??? NOOOO THEY DID HIM SOO DIRTY. DANNY SWEETIE IM SO SORRY.

-johnny and danny bein friends and staging a fake fight (which danny takes too seriously, once again this child has aggression he NEEDS TO WORK OUT) I hope these three stay friends, I said it before but danny needs more friendly ghosts to hang with.

-at this point, Danny's ghost enemies are a lot like, I dunno, batman's rouge gallery is the first thing that comes to mind. they all have their own gimmick and unique designs, but most of them are easy to beat after learning the Moral Lesson. I still get excited when any of them show up again, though. 18 is another valerie episode!!!! :D skulker really said you two will get along if I have to handcuff you together <3 and the gym teacher really said, youre married now, have a flour baby! ngl, I'm not really watching this show for the shipping stuff (which I am very scared to look at the fandom for after I finish this watch through- I feel like there's probably discourse/arguing about ships...) but. I'm gonna put my opinion out there. valerie/danny > sam/danny. maybe I just really love the enemies to lovers trope. And the secret identity stuff adds Extra Flavor.

-SKULKER JUST HAVING THE BOX GHOST AND DANGLING HIM BY A STRING. HILARIOUS. and him watching them with binoculars and making his silly little commentary. AND MAKING THE SACK BABY CRY. LMAO. THIS DUDE IS A BABY KIDNAPPER. skulker is super fun

-danny, you just...collapsed the water tower. and then attacked the nasty burger machine...mascot thingy...out of anger..I KEEP SAYING HE'S GOT ANGER ISSUES BUT. HE REALLY NEEDS A LESSON IN MANAGING COLLATERAL DAMAGE!!! So does valerie!! They're both pretty focused on each other. I mean it's good of Danny to say he's trying to make sure PEOPLE don't get hurt, but... (I mean I guess it's not something 14 year olds WOULD worry about, but as an adult im like, who's going to fix that? how much money will that take??)

-TUCKER MAKING BANK. and sam and tucker being super emotionally attached to their flour baby and being pretty good parents. that's cute...also him just straight kissing her and being like. WAIT. O_O JDSKAFHD. his mom baking them into cookies was the funniest possible result. tbh I dont feel like this is on tucker, if anything the other kid's shouldve been more responsible! He was just taking an opportunity to get that $$ which I respect

-Danny being more understanding of Valerie's situation in the end (helping her at her job, too, and trying to keep that a secret for her!!!) And seeing them work together this ep, and also her letting phantom get her out of the ghost zone...was very sweet. LOVE that. more valerie eps pls

-me when I realize vlad's big stupid house exploded because of his own carelessness with changing the ghost portal ectofiltrator or whatever: *pointing and laughing*

-me when I realize it means he's gonna go make danny's life hell for it somehow: >:(

-SCOOBY PARODY!!! I feel like there's gotta be some scooby doo/danny phantom crossover stuff, right? also, 'guys in white' men in black wishes

-'oh, that's right! dad married the love of your life! you're bitter and alone!' DANNNNNYY GET HIS ASS ONCE AGAIN WE ARE POINTING AND LAUGHING AT VLAD

-'jack, you captured the ghost boy!!' UMM. he did nothing <3 'we have a weapon's vault??' YOU HAVE A WEAPONS VAULT??? and jack didnt put a handle on the inside. of fucking course he didnt! why would you leave that to your son!! or expect him to clean YOUR LAB when its where you work with probably dangerous chemicals and weapons and hes 14!! give him normal chores, like, I dunno, vacuuming, laundry, dishes...CMON. I hate it here. But I'm glad Jack is more chill about danny while he's a ghost, and willing to work with him for this ep. AND. I DID ENJOY JACK PUNCHING VLAD IN THE FACE. AND GENERALLY JUST OWNING HIM. the ghost punchy fists are actually amazing. like yeah, just punch a ghost in the face. that rules.

-ep 20 opens with the coolest fucking ghost lady design. her tattoos can come off and fight. MA'AM. I like ur nose ring and your cape maam hello 👉👈😳

-sam's grandma is hilarious and the most valid member of her family and I love her. thats my grandma now. and tucker covering for sam by dressing as her. thats true friendship <3 also skipping school to go to a goth circus. just bestie things! sam's parents are haters but for all the wrong reasons.

-'my family has controlled ghosts with this for generations!' WAIT. WAIT FREAKSHOW /ISNT/ A GHOST? I didn't expect that...he's just a fucked up guy controlling ghosts? anyway watching danny shoot at police cars and rob banks while mind controlled. its like, the most stereotypical 'bad' things lmao. (tbh an evil ghost circus troupe is a sick concept)

this gives off big deviantart emo edit vibes

(I'm going to assume evil circus reaper danny has a lot of fan content. people love an edgy au, except this one is canon (even tho its via mind control...having the protag go evil otherwise might be hard, I guess?) but au where he stays with the troupe...that has to exist, right?)

ANYWAY. excited to start s2!! lowkey surprised by how many notes some of these posts have gotten. I've gone back and tagged them all with 'dp thoughts' so they're easier to find on my blog! ^^ and I will probably possibly do (more) fanart on my art blog after I finish the watch of the whole show, so like. @sanchoyodraws follow my art blog :)

[clareguilty]

By Your Side

Hello i wanted these two to smooch bc i think theyre very cute alsdjaldjasl

Arthur Morgan/Kieran Duffy Rating: T | No Warnings Word Count: ~2100

 It was weeks before Arthur was on his feet again. Abigail said the wound in his shoulder must have gotten infected, that his body was overworked enough as it was. She threatened to tie him to the bed.

 He was never alone for too long. The girls took shifts, sitting with him, reading to him, feeding him. Lenny, Hosea, even John. They were all there for him.

 Marston, damn him. Sat there for hours, arms crossed and brows pinched. Hardly said a word, just groused and grumbled and looked at Arthur like he couldn't decide if he wanted to hit him or kiss him.

 Arthur had felt the same way after John nearly got eaten by wolves. The bonds of brotherhood or something like that, he figured.

 And then there was Kieran. Duffy boy. Not an O'Driscoll. Skittish and quiet, only ever coming around when no one else was nearby.

 Even though Arthur was laid up with a bum shoulder and battered ribs, Kieran was afraid of him. Always looked ready to bolt at a moment's notice.

 But he kept coming around. There was something pushing him to fight that meekness.

 Arthur finally found out late one night. It was dark, and all he could see of the boy was the silhouette of his unkempt hair. But he was there.

 "I know how Colm can be," Kieran said. Quiet. Apologetic. "No one deserves that. Especially not you."

 Arthur was quiet for a moment. So that was it.

 "You don't deserve it either."

 Kieran's breath hitched, like no one ever told him that before. Arthur's heart ached. He had been cruel to the boy, and he regretted it.

 "You hear me, boy?" Arthur asked. "You're too good for this. You deserve better."

 Kieran sniffled and was gone in an instant.

 He didn't stop coming around. Continued to spend his nights sitting quietly near Arthur. It was nice, not being alone.

 "Duffy," Arthur hissed one night.

 "Yea?"

 "How's my horse? I want to see her."

 "She's just fine Mr. Morgan. I've been spoiling her these past few weeks for you."

 Arthur huffed. At least the beast was in good hands. Arthur preferred the company of his horse to most everyone, and he hated being away from her for so long. But he trusted that Kieran was taking good care of her.

 "How far can you walk?" Kieran asked.

 "I dunno, Abigail never lets me get very far." Arthur had been confined to a very small radius the past several weeks. Every time he tried to sneak away from his bed, someone caught him and turned him back around.

 "Well," Kieran said slowly. "She's asleep right now. Grimshaw too."

 Arthur was already pushing himself up, groaning in pain. Kieran was at his side in an instant. "Here, Mr. Morgan. Lean on me."

 Arthur was heavier than Kieran anticipated, even after his infection had weakened him. Still, the two of them stumbled and staggered towards the horses. It was slow going, but Arthur was determined.

 The horse looked fine -- cleaner than ever before. Kieran must have brushed her every single day. As soon as she saw Arthur, she stomped her hooves and tossed her head.

 "Hey there, Old Girl," Arthur reached for her with his good arm. "I've missed you."

 Kieran huffed and wheezed as he shouldered Arthur's weight, but it was worth it to see the way his eyes crinkled. Arthur looked happier than he had in a long time. They made their way back to Arthur's bunk, laughing as Kieran nearly toppled them both.

 -

 Abigail gave him hell for walking, but Arthur didn’t mind too much. He shot a wink at Kieran while she ranted and raved about “rest” and “saving his energy.”

 And damn if Kieran didn’t blush bright red, nearly tripping over himself. It made Arthur’s heart swell.

 -

 Teasing Kieran was far too satisfying. The poor boy wore his heart on his sleeve. Arthur constantly ribbed him.

 “You’re too young to be drinking that, boy.” Arthur snatched a bottle of shine from his hand. Was Abigail going to chew him out for getting drunk? Probably. Was it worth it to see the way Kieran’s eyes widened as Arthur licked a stray drop from the lip of the bottle? Definitely.

 -

 Finally, finally finally -- Arthur was strong enough to get back to work.

 There was no chance of him going out. He could hardly walk the length of camp without needing to sit down for a while, but he itched to work, to be useful. The girls enjoyed the company, teasing Arthur for his shoddy sewing skills and unevenly cut vegetables. As long as he didn’t have to spend another minute trapped in that damn bed he would take as much criticism as Susan could dish out.

 His strength came back, and he could carry crates and bags of feed and bales of hay. So he took to working with the horses alongside Duffy boy. He was easy company, and even easier to tease. They were both quiet, good with the horses, content to spend long afternoons sitting in the sun, Arthur sketching quietly in his journal and Kieran sprawled out in the grass letting his mind wander. Arthur often wondered what went through the boy’s head. He was too sweet for his own good, foolish. Not terribly bright but certainly filled with plenty of ideas under his ratty old hat.

 “You’re awful kind for a killer, Mr. Morgan,” he remarked one day out of the blue.

 Arthur bit back the first words that flew to his tongue, an empty threat that would send the boy running with his tail between his legs. Instead he chewed his lip for a moment, considering.

 “I don’t just kill anybody. I tend to try to leave more alive than I do dead -- when I get the chance that is.” Arthur shrugged.

 “Like me?” The boy was looking at him with those wide, pleading eyes. Arthur could never quite figure out if the kid wanted something from him or if he just looked like that.

 Again, he had to hold himself back. He no longer took pleasure in scaring the boy shitless, and he had to fight the reflex in him that always wanted to growl and threaten. It was okay to let his guard down. As much as he hated to say it, he trusted the boy.

 “Yeah, like you,” Arthur shook his head. “Who else would humor me like this? Certainly not Bill.”

 “You think I’m funny?” Kieran’s head cocked to the side. He looked puzzled.

 “Yeah,” Arthur said flatly. “Hilarious.

 The boy pouted. Arthur had to admit it was effective. “You’re teasing me again,” he whined.

 “You make it too easy.” Arthur reached out and ruffled his hair. Kieran practically melted under the touch. He flushed bright pink, a dopey grin spreading across his face before he ducked away, skittering off like he always did.

 -

 The boy cowered and ran under any kind of attention, so Arthur had to hide his staring. He didn’t care who else saw him as long as Kieran didn’t know he was being watched.

 He liked watching Kieran. He was sweet and eager and gentle. From what little he had gathered of Kieran’s past, he had every excuse to be just as bitter and angry as the rest of them. Arthur was a selfish fool, he knew, but he wanted as much of that sweetness as he could get.

 “What’s with you and the O’Driscoll?” Marston asked, sitting down directly in Arthur’s line of vision and effectively blocking his view of Kieran and Mary-Beth sitting together with a book

 “He’s not an O’Driscoll,” Arthur grumbled.

 John’s grin turned sly. “You’re too easy to read, Morgan.”

 Arthur took another drink from his beer. Since he couldn’t watch Kieran, he enjoyed the way the afternoon sun played off of the surface of the water. “I will drown you in the lake,” he said coolly.

 “Then you’d have to deal with Abigail bein’ sore with you. I’m pretty sure she wants the privilege of drowning me.” John looked far too pleased with himself. He thought he was so damn clever.

 “We’ll do it together then.”

 Marston let out a loud, raspy laugh, banging the table with his fist. Arthur almost wished he would go back to sulking and whining about his scratches.

 “I’ll leave you to your staring then,” John shook his head, still chuckling, and wandered off.

 -

 Arthur felt like he was stumbling. Unsure of himself and out of his depth. There were many things he could do: kill, rob, steal, ride, shoot. He did not know how to be sweet. But he wanted to. He wanted to show Kieran the same kindness and consideration that he had shown Arthur. He wanted to make up for how cruel he had been to the boy.

 When was finally feeling well enough to ride into town, he stopped by the general store to refill his satchel with supplies. The barrels of taffy would normally have never caught his eye, but he remembered how excited Kieran had been when Mary-Beth broke off a piece of her chocolate for him. Kieran liked sweet.

 Arthur bought two bags.

 Jack was thrilled to get a bag of candy. Abigail thanked Arthur for his thoughtfulness and eyed the second bag with a gleaming curiosity. It felt like everyone in camp was conspiring against him.

 Kieran smiled so brightly when he noticed Arthur heading his way. He hadn’t even given him the damn candies and he was already beaming. Arthur did his best not to fumble his words.

 “Finally managed to get to the store, and I picked these up for you. I noticed you liked sweets and I was already getting some for the boy-” Arthur cut himself off with a shrug, awkwardly holding out the bag of candies.

 They were both blushing fools. Kieran took the bag, holding it delicately as if it were the most valuable thing in the world. “I can’t wait to share them with you, Mr. Morgan.”

 And Arthur knew he was done for.

 -

 Kieran was filthy. Covered in mud and dust, hair unkempt and unwashed. It had stormed recently, and everyone was covered in dirt to some degree. Somehow Kieran had attracted the worst of it.

 Arthur frowned at the boy. One of the mares hadn’t taken too well to the weather, and Kieran hadn’t left the horse’s side since. He was breaking of small pieces of oatcake and waiting patiently for the horse to eat. He lit up with a smile every time, and Arthur wanted to kiss him so badly.

 But the boy was covered in mud.

 Arthur waited until the horse had finished eating before striding over and hauling Kieran up by the scruff. “Come on, Duffy. We’ve got to get you clean.”

 Kieran was taken by surprise, tripping over his own feet as Arthur dragged him along. “It’s no trouble Mr. Morgan. I’d just wind up dirty again tomorrow anyways. The ground’s not dry yet.”

 “Then we can wash you again tomorrow,” Arthur said. He led them through the trees towards a nice stretch of creek, running water, about waist deep. It was a nice spot to bathe when he couldn’t make it back into town.

 “Strip,” Arthur was already tugging his own boots off, digging a bar of soap out of his satchel. Kieran only hesitated a moment before shrugging out of his clothes. Those would need to be washed too, but Arthur was too busy dragging the boy into the water with him to care.

 Kieran didn’t protest as Arthur lathered up the soap and began scrubbing mud and dirt off the both of them. He had always craved Arthur’s touch, and the scrape of the callouses of his palm against bare skin was almost more than he could handle.

 He hadn’t expected Arthur to dig his fingers into Kieran’s side, causing him to yelp and jump away. Arthur was grinning, looking far too pleased with himself. Kieran smiled back and splashed half-heartedly at Arthur.

 They wrestled in the creek. Arthur easily overpowered Kieran, dunking him under the water a few times and tackling him into the silt. Kieran howled with laughter and clung to Arthur for dear life.

 And then Arthur kissed him. Already breathless and panting, he dragged Kieran in and pressed their lips together. It was clumsy and awkward for a few moments as Kieran froze in shock, but he kissed back eagerly once he found himself again.

 Arthur pulled away with a contented sigh, shaking water out of his hair and chuckling to himself. “Been wanting to do that, but you’ve been sleeping in the damn mud for three days now.”

 Kieran turned pink and then red, clearly overwhelmed. Arthur pulled back a little to give him some space.

 “What if-” Kieran started and then lost his courage. It took him a few tries to get through his words. “What if I slept by you instead?”

 Arthur wanted nothing more.

[embrassemoi]

(1/8) *inhales* *starts screaming like a howler* IT'S HAPPENING OH MY GOD IT'S HAPPENING! Honestly, you have no idea after how many times I checked tumblr after your sbtmas update post. I don't even know where to begin. Probably I should start with moony, right! When he took her flying and asked her to let go of her hands, it kind of reminded me of *that* scene from titanic but with stars and actual flying (sorry jack dawson but remus lupin is and always will be superior). It was just so, so

*inhales too and starts screaming back* HOLY - IT'S HAPPENING! AHHHHHH! REMUSSSSS! AHHHHHHHH - KEEP CALM !!!!!

Ah! now that you mention it, it also reminds me of that 'I'm flying' from titanic!

(2/8) beautiful. I cannot even begin listing everything I loved about that scene or else I would have to copy and paste the entire thing here. "But now, watching her glow, it dawned on Remus that he was holding the golden beam that threatened to paint the midnight sky gold." I mean- I probably read this three times because *screaming* HE'S IN LOVE, YOUR HONOR!!! Also I love, love, love the sun, moon and stars being used to represent mc, remus and sirius. It's kind of interesting sun is actually

I WANT YOU TO KNOW I WAS 100% SCREAMING WHILE WRITING THAT ENTIRE SCENE LMFAO! I'm glad you liked it! It was definitely *so far* one of my favourite scenes to write

(3/8) a star so they are similar and belong together, but also the moon and sun are kind of opposites and opposites attract and complete each other. So both sirius and remus are good matches for her but have very diffrent dynamics... I don't know, I am probably overthinking again. But I just don't know who to ship her with at this point. And I don't think you are going to fast with their relationship, their relationship progressed so naturally and beautifully, especially since the beginning

Well when I was in the planning stages of figuring out what I wanted to really add in this fic, one of the first things that came to mind was taking advantage of the moon and star metaphors. it makes things so much more romantic / angsty and plus - they're there. what am I supposed to do - not use the absolute gold I have at my finger tips? (see what I did there)

and no! I always encourage predictions being made. some of my readers have been scarily accurate and it scares the fuck outta me but they're hilarious to read! Like I had one clever reader send in a prediction of what was going to happen and my jaw dropped. Spot on!

also for the MC and remus' relationship progressing - I had to cut out so m u c h because it really was too rushed. But don't worry, it'll be moved to other upcoming chapters!

(4/8) of the sixth year. Okay, I know this chapter was remus' time to shine but can we talk about sirius for a minute? The way he looked at with so much vulnerability in front of everyone. Couple of chapters ago he didn't even cast a spell at her during their duel and bowed in front of her. Considering how romantic feelings are foreign to him, it's crazy to see how much he grown to care for her in a short amount of time. I can't help but love their chemisty, even after everything that happend.

SIRIUS! darling... I feel awful. I can't wait to write his POV of how he's feeling sometime in the near future.

yeah, I was also trying to go for the intense guilt he feels about everything so :p I love torturing characters, don’t I?

(5/8) And there were so many little things in this chapter that made me so happy. McLaggen already started causing drama and I'm so here for it. Sybill celebrating her birthday. Matthew being the best friend ever (When gaplin family owl arrived, i though something happend to him and I was terrified). Lily finally talking to mc again! Regulus' extravagant gift! But being dramatic must be a Black family thing. I can't belive he got her a ring that practically screams "the noble and most ancient

McLaggen - stirring the pot. sly mother fucker haha!

Matthew made a little cameo! I love writing him :D!!!! I have a few things in store for his arch and ughhhh ahahahahah. and omg! no! If I was going to hurt Matthew, I wouldn't do It this early. (That sounds like a threat haha)

(6/8) house of black" while hiding their friendship. Somebody bound to connect the dots (sirius maybe?), right? And he's with his parents for "an event"? Very suspicious. P.S. Bc I'm not creative with names (like remus' parents) I was calling the bunny furry little problem the second or moony jr. in my head. And as for name... flopsy could be cute. I know it's very stereotypical but there was a children's book called "the tale of flopsy bunnies" and I feel like remus might have been familiar

Lmfao fucking Regulus - or really the black family - always one for the dramatic. I can't wait to *eventually* write more of dramatic ass Sirius.

I've also been referring to the bunny as 'furry little problem' in my head haha!

(7/8) with muggle children's books because of his mother and idk, naming a pet after a book character feels like something he would do. Also floppy and flops were some of the nicknames james used to call mc, so it could be cute (But owl bait is also a brilliant name as well). P.P.S. Can we talk about how after mc comes to his dorm for the "bunny time" (very cute btw) remus said something like "i feel like you're using me for my pet" and in one of the previous chapters mc told him he was using

- also I'm surprised you remember that part about James calling her 'Flops' ETC considering I only mentioned it briefly. Wow! And you're absolutely right, it would be such a cute call back to the MC!

I'm going to be running a 'poll' (idk if I should call it that) sometime within the next few days of a list of name suggestions I've gotten and let readers choose the name! and I'll totally add your suggestion to the list. love it!

(8/8) her for the casette player. I don't know if it was intentional but for some reason that made me laugh so hard. And seems like I talked way too much again thank you for this chapter and thank you for listening/reading my ramblings, I guess. *screaming stops* *howler rips itself into pieces* -🌸

It was intentional! I'm glad you caught on!

and thank you for rambling, as always I loved reading it! Made my week :D xx I wish you a wonderful day/evening 😊

[birlcholtz]

any bittyholtz headcanons👀

holster knows he’s big ok? and he realizes pretty quick his sophomore year that bitty is Not Great at handling large guys coming at him quickly. so out of consideration for this tiny frosh, who is cute but holster can also tell is scared shitless by ransom and holster being their loud selves, holster tries to be conscious of bitty and respect his space (and also not yell too much around him because who knows what specifically bothers him)

and the great thing about ransom and holster being best bros for so long is that holster doesn’t have to explain what he’s doing to ransom, ransom just kind of matches him and that’s that

and holster is delighted every time bitty opens up a bit more and relaxes a bit more around the team, and when he comes out to ransom and holster holster internally is like oh. oh of COURSE. of course big loud jocks who talk about hooking up with women all the time and check people really hard on the ice bother him. duh holster

but holster would NEVER hurt someone for being gay that’s a huge asshole move and he feels it is Very Important That Bitty Knows That Holster Would Never Hurt Him. why does he feel it’s so important?? that’s a question for later holster isn’t a whole ‘analyze my feelings’ dude

so holster actively makes an effort to be around bitty in a non-threatening way. by a couple of months into spring semester they’re very comfortable around each other, comfortable enough that bitty jokes about their size difference and at one point he literally jumps into holster’s arms (who catches him on instinct) and then holster is like oh my god i’m holding bitty. oh my god he’s so small but so muscular. oh my god his hair smells so nice oh god oh fUCK

there is literally so much more under the cut. (send me ur headcanons for rarepairs/qpps!)

bitty, for his part, was initially very wary of ransom and holster for exactly the reasons holster figured out. it also doesn’t help that ransom dresses like a preppy frat bro and holster dresses like a messy frat bro. they’re both frat bros and bitty takes a long time to warm up to them.

but what does help is the way holster always lets bitty know he’s there before he gets too close (sometimes bitty is in the zone in the kitchen and doesn’t notice things like his teammates entering), and the way he doesn’t friendly-punch bitty like he does ransom. or jack. or shitty. or even lardo honestly nobody’s safe. except bitty is.

holster is also definitely responsible for putting some of bitty’s favorite songs on the kegster playlist and bitty definitely finds out and his heart warms a little more

and once bitty’s come out to ransom and holster and they don’t treat him any differently or weirdly and still profess their love for him when he bakes things without a single no homo, bitty finds himself hanging around with them a little more?

ransom likes to study in the attic without distractions so that means that bitty and holster wind up spending a lot more time together and listen. bitty can’t spend that much time with holster without noticing that the guy is a) extremely tall b) ripped and c) has an excellent jawline. and bitty is only human y’all

when he plays music in the kitchen holster will always dance (and sing along if he knows the words, or enough of the words to get them wrong in a funny way because bitty’s laugh sounds like angels singing and okay yeah holster is smitten)

holster Cannot make pies because he cannot touch pastry, bitty forbids him from trying before he even asks because his hands are too warm and he’ll fuck it all up. (holster, internally, is pleased bitty’s noticed. bitty, internally, is like fuck was that too weird) BUT if holster is in there he usually gets dragged into stirring things or chopping things or handing bitty sticks of butter from the fridge and basically whatever he can do without fucking up the pastry

and a while after that holster is like hang on wait it’s been a while since i realized i had a crush on bitty and it has Not gone away should i like. i don’t know. fucking tell him i’m into guys or something like that?? that would be smart

this is more how they get together than a list of headcanons LMAO i always get distracted and this is so fucking long omg

so he’s like rans. how do i do this. and ransom is like you should blast gettin’ bi from crazy ex girlfriend and holster is like weird. i love it.

other things holster does to subtly let bitty know he’s bi: loudly discuss his plans for going to pride that summer, make a lot of bi puns and hope one of them lands, show bitty funny posts from the lgbtq+ samwell student group on facebook

eventually bitty is like . hm. holster is either a VERY supportive ally. or he is trying to tell me something. and after the 80th bi meme post from the facebook group he’s like holster. hon. are you trying to tell me something

and holster is like YES. I AM BISEXUAL and bitty’s like oh that’s great!! (internally: can i climb him like a tree yet)

and then bitty’s like well thanks for telling me! and holster is like uh yeah! (because listen he’s good at wheeling but he is SO bad at wheeling bitty because this isn’t just someone cute he found at a kegster u know??? it’s BITTY and holster kind of wants to sweep him off his feet but in like. a gentlemanly way that won’t scare him)

when holster relates this interaction to ransom ransom is like oh my fucking god holster you could have told him and holster is like yeah and i did not for some fucking reason???????? ransom. i’m dumb and ransom is like no you just caught feelings

(bitty, to shitty: hey so uh. if a guy aggressively hints he’s into guys for like. a month. and then when i ask him straight out he tells me he’s bi. what does that mean. and shitty’s like i mean i wouldn’t know unless i know the guy?? but i wouldn’t ask u to tell me bc like. hes gotta choose who he’s out to u know and bitty’s like yeah i mean u know him but maybe i’ll ask him who else he’s out to bc i need some advice and shitty is like hell yeah)

the next day, bitty’s like holster are u out to anyone else?? just bc the team seems kinda. hetero. except for me. and holster is like oh yeah rans knows and shitty knows. also johnson. and jack if he’s not stupid because i’ve definitely had guys stay over. but mostly just the guys in the haus yeah

then they go to murder stop ‘n shop and buy baking ingredients. holster carries a metric fuck ton of flour and butter and pretends he doesn’t notice bitty staring at his arms (but he might flex just a little more than necessary)

so bitty’s like EXCELLENT. and then he talks to shitty again and is like IT’S HOLSTER AND I’M SUPER INTO HIM WHAT DO I DO and shitty’s like hooooo boy. and then HE’S like well uh. holster doesn’t like. feel the need to formally come out to people usually like the way he told me was by just telling me about a guy he hooked up with last year with zero context or warning? like i don’t know holster as well as, like, rans, but he definitely wants you specifically to know that he’s bi.

and bitty’s like intriguing. i’m gonna go combust now. and shitty’s like cool catch ya later.

so then bitty decides there’s only one way to find out if holster’s into him. and it’s not asking him, what the fuck?? no obviously not. it’s wearing very short shorts and touching him a lot and watching him to see if he blushes or gets flustered. bitty may not be a blunt or forthright person when it comes to hitting on people but he can at least make it impossible for holster to try and hide any feelings he may or may not have.

so rip holster is what i’m saying. but he also observes how much bitty is still watching him-- usually when bitty is doing something like wearing very short shorts or dancing at a kegster or flinging himself into holster’s lap-- and he’s like HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. because also holster is like way more experienced with like. relationships in general? like he’s familiar with what someone flirting with him looks like. so he’s like alright well if bitty wants to make me suffer i’m going to make him suffer too. (’rans can i borrow your skinny jeans’ ‘is this so you can get back at bitty’ ‘yes it’s important’ ‘yeah sure whatever’)

holster knows he’s jacked, he just has to make sure bitty knows it. he also knows that bitty is comfortable with holster standing pretty close to him now so he’s going to use that to his advantage since holster is also tall as Fuck. (obviously he doesn’t do anything creepy like stand right behind him or smth but like. if they’re talking. holster is gonna get just a little in bitty’s space just so bitty has to look up at him a little. is this partially because bitty has really nice eyelashes? yeah)

basically what i’m saying is once holster decides to get back at bitty all hell breaks loose. literally nobody else in the haus can deal with the sexual tension when they’re in the same room. bitty is now pretty sure that holster is into him. shitty texts bitty saying ‘can you please bone for the love of god’. for good measure shitty also texts holster saying the same thing. he’s so tired but also this is hilarious

like it gets EXTRA. bitty and holster can both bend and snap and they DO. holster intentionally spills water on his t-shirt to make it cling more. when he sits at the kitchen table doing work bitty comes by and leans over his shoulder to see what he’s doing and if he brushes holster’s neck a little as he does it, well, that’s between them. at one point holster and bitty are both standing at the counter washing dishes and holster starts chirping bitty about not being able to reach the top shelf and asks if he wants to stand on a chair and bitty’s like hmm or you could just carry me. and holster almost has a conniption and it gets even worse when they finish washing up and bitty’s like oh great the counter’s all cleared off! and hops up and sits on it and that gets his face a little closer, vertically, to holster, who is suddenly aware that bitty is wearing very short shorts AGAIN, which like, seem to have become his uniform, and that when bitty sits like that holster can barely see those shorts, that’s how tiny they are, and it looks like bitty’s just sitting there in a shirt and nothing else and holster’s brain supplies a LOT of images once he thinks of that and hoo boy.

and holster’s like how can i get back at him. and bitty’s sitting right next to the hanging cabinets so holster grabs some of the plates from the drying rack that look dry enough and goes and stands *right* in front of bitty. like he’s not actually brushing bitty’s legs where they dangle off the counter but if he stepped forward like. half an inch. he would be. and they make eye contact for a second and then, without moving, holster starts putting plates away.

and bitty is like oh my fucking god WHAT else do i have to do (he doesn’t say this out loud) and then when holster’s done putting away the plates and it looks like he’s going to go grab more bitty just. wraps his legs around holster’s waist and pulls him in (and holster is like holy FUCK because he knew bitty’s legs were strong but not THAT STRONG HOLY SHIT) and at this point there’s really nothing else for them to do but make out at the kitchen counter and that’s what they do. (bitty does, in fact, climb that man like a tree)

okay so some actual headcanons lol. you thought you knew bitty was a clothes stealing fiend?? you were wrong. he absolutely is but you just didn’t know how much. does holster still have literally any of his sweatshirts? probably not honestly

the only way bitty will sit on the green couch will be if holster is sitting on the green couch and bitty is sitting in his lap because that way he can avoid any actual contact with the couch

when bitty makes anything with blueberries in it holster steals some but he also feeds bitty some because he’s mushy like that

they continue to go to extreme lengths to try and get each other flustered in public. shitty is so tired.

they share playlists constantly and even more of bitty’s favorites find their way onto the kegster playlist

when bitty moves into the haus holster is in his room c o n s t a n t l y. he just likes the space ok??? there’s lil reminders of bitty everywhere and of course if bitty is there too then that’s just the BEST

the puck bunny halloween costume physically murders adam birkholtz

[dem-cp-hoes]

Sorry to bother you, but can you do some wholesome/cute head canons for the creepypastas please?

You're not bothering at all, no worries😊

Though I think these turned out to be general hc rather than cute but... 🤷‍♀️

---------------------------------------------------

Jeff:

I think it's pretty much canon that Jeff names his knives. Most people would think that he gives them badass names but nah...

His favorite is named Martha, no one else is allowed to touch her

There's also Kule, Austin and Annie, sometimes he talks to them (mostly about Liu)

No, you can't point it out/comment on it, it'll upset him

Smile is his best friend, Ben is jealous

His hair gets curly after a few days, which means he has to straighten it with an iron

He also puts his hair buns, or ponytails around the house (he looks good tbh)

^the reason he always has hair ties as well

He's either dead asleep or hasn't slept for 4 days straight, there's no in-between

Not a total asshole all the time, surprisingly

He doesn't make mean comments about things that hit too close to home

Like, sure he's gonna tease Toby for his ticks but he's never gonna mention his sister

He makes up his own curse words

He puts on chapstick, but no one knows

Everyone knows, they've seen him, Ben has a video

He talks during movies, questioning the logic and making comments about characters' decisions, nobody minds bc it's hilarious since everything he says is on point

He drinks the sweetest coffee with milk and 3 spoonfuls of sugar at least

Loves romantic movies, but he has a reputation

Has a small cactus in his room, it was a gift from Ben, he takes good care of it

Ben:

He has freckles!!! He has freckles everywhere!!! (sorry I got excited, I just love freckles) but bc of the whole dead/demon thing, you have to get close to him of you want to see them

Owns a lot of fandom themed hoodies and t-shirts

He can mimic a lot of cartoons' voices, including the jigglypuff song, it's quite impressive

He's very proud of it

Ben is a genius, since he's mostly attached to a computer he has access to anything the internet has to offer, so lots of knowledge

Sometimes he can answer like Alexa/Siri does if someone calls his name and asks something

The others think he can't control it and ask him things all the time

He absolutely can control it and only does it to fuck with them by giving them bullshit answers that sound legit

He collects action figures, what a dork

Has a hamster, his name is Picachu

He gets teased a lot over it, let him live pls

The others secretly love it tho

Loves to watch people argue through their cameras

He lives for the drama

"Ben what are u doing?" "I'm watching this couple in New Jersey, apparently Sharon cheated on Nick again, but this time with his sister!!!"

When he giggles/gets embarrassed his ears become bright red

Sits on the floor, sits on tables, sits on Jane, Slender is convinced he doesn't know what a chair is

Jack:

Any perfume with a very heavy scent makes him sneeze a lot

He refuses to believe he is hurt/sick

Jack, while being held down by all the proxies: Guys, I told you I'm fINE, I CAN WORK TODAY, JUST LET ME GO!!

He has a lot of animal mannerisms

Like licking someone he likes on the cheek, purring/growling, sniffing etc

Bruh, you scratch behind his ears or under his chin and his whole chest vibrates with purring

He tilts his head on the side when he's confused, like a dog

Loves scented candles, he has a bunch of them in his room

His favorite scent is lavender

He can in fact eat human food, it just can't sustain him all that well and anything that is not overly seasoned tastes bland

With that being said, he loves spicy food bc he can taste it properly

Jane screamed when she saw him eat an entire plate of ghost peppers with no milk

The jingle of keys makes his head turn sharply towards the sound, once again like a dog

He can fall asleep anywhere, and I mean anywhere

The porch? More than once

In another's room? Of course

In slender's office? That was quite an interesting thing to explain

In the middle of the kitchen? Yeah, once

He's just a sleepy boi

Jack is the one who knows everyone's ticklish spots bc gives check ups

Likes listening to audio books on his free time

Masky:

He drinks Irish coffee (for those of you who don't know, it has alcohol in it)

Once Masky called Slender dad (sleep deprived) and then proceeded to slam his head down on the table and say a bad word

Sally once made him a flower crown for his birthday

He refused to take it off for 5 hours!!

Won't sleep with less than 2 pillows

He considers his one True near death experience to be when he almost choked on one of Jane's fake eyelashes (long story)

He has mastered the 'disapproving face' game', even when he wears the mask, you can feel it's there

He's around Toby, what did you expect?

Doesn't trust giraffes ("why are they so fucking long????")

He has a very contagious laugh when he really laughs, even when he just grins

Can give the best hugs, hands down

Like you feel so warm and protected when he hugs you

And it doesn't help the fact that he smells like the forest after a rainy day.... (now I want a hug)

Hoodie:

He has dirt on everyone

Mainly bc he's quiet and reliable so people tell him stuff

Has Masky saved in his phone as 'Bae' and when people see it they ask, "Is he your boyfriend?"

And he replies with, "Nah, it stands for Biggest Asshole Ever"

Drinks tea by the gallon

Reigning champion of "How many objects can we put on Jeff while he sleeps"

Hoodie has those "hoe don't do it" moments pretty much every day

Jeff trying to start shit, Ben is planning a prank on someone, someone insulted Slender. Every time

Award winning smile

His hair is the softest thing ever I swear-

Will make tea for anyone he sees that's having a rough day

He likes to sketch people, he's actually pretty good

He likes to read books to calm down

If someone wants to he will read out loud to them

Toby:

Don't give him energy drinks

It won't make him hyper, oh no, but it will make him do dumb shit

Once, Helen made the mistake of handing him a red bull, and let's just say he was found playing a mix between 'the floor is lava' and 'don't let the balloon touch the floor'

It was intense

President of Protect the Bees and very proud of it

Will follow through with literally any dare, he takes impulsivity to new levels

Will let Sally do his hair and dress him up to play princess

That friend who sends you fucking memes at 3am just to be a prick

It's easy to get him flustered, especially if someone flirts with him

He is obsessed with sour sweets, not even he knows why

There's no such thing as personal space, he's comfortable around everyone

Gets excited when he sees a cartoon on tv from when he was a kid

Places the stickers Sally gives him on the headboard of his bed

He knows how to say, "can I pet your dog?" in 4 languages

[phoebehalliwell]

So I LOVED your Sheridan and Warren fic!! The two of them are hilarious because that are just trying their best those poor boys! I had a hypothetical, so like in all those AU where Prue is wished alive in I Dream of Phoebe, what would happen in this situation? Would Prue go see her sisters or would she go find her kids? ALSO Prue as the boys magical (deceased) guide is Perf 👌🏻

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA tysm !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love my boys so much i’m really trying to keep them like. like as removed from proper magic as possible bc i just think it’s really fucking funny to just follow two bimbos around as they try their best. i’ve also def like tinkered w canon a lil bit as explained in this post here only to keep them further away from aunts who could explain everything like they don’t even have a whitelighter bc paige was supposed to fill that role really the only person they have is prue who gave them a crash course when she unbound their powers as explained in this post and they will occasionally summon her but even then it’s less for advice and more bc like. they want 2 talk to their mom. and i do think prue will occasionally try to make like guest appearances on their birthday she’d def be a presence kinda like how grams was a presence for the girls if they had a book of shadows prue would do the flipping. but they don’t. she did guide their familiar to them!! the cat’s name is swizzlesticks and yes it is just kit again lmao. But. Ur Question. so basically in w&s’s origins jack raised them post prue death and like he kinda fucked off to japan for the rest of the show (sidenote both warren and sheridan are quasi fluent in japanese like jack the only difference is while jack uses his bilingual talents for business the twins almost exclusively use this ability to multitask while watching anime) so i think piper and phoebe had like Zero contact w their nephews and paige actually has never met them like she didn’t even really know they existed bc deadass just no one mentioned them. so like if prue is wished back to life in i dream of phoebe for starters she’s gonna know chris is piper and leo’s son bc she’s been keeping an ear to the ground and Heavily monitoring this chris situation before she assessed that he was good she spent a lot of time trying to figure out if a ghost should beat the shit out of an alive witch so idk who’s wishing prue alive in this specific au tbh u know what richard’s kinda off the shits this ep he’s probably wish prue back to life to try to prove to paige that she doesn’t have to be a charmed one she can just be paige :) and paige would lose her SHIT bc like oh my god that was not what she wanted and she’s so not ready to meet prue but here she is lmao and chris is freaking out bc now he really knows he’s altered the future in Major ways i think piper would see prue and immediately pass out and while i think prue would really really want to see her kids her first task would definitely be fixing the future and she would entirely dedicate herself to making sure wyatt doesn’t become evil but i think like she would pull chris aside and be like hi in your future where are my kids and chris would be like who? and prue would be like my sons?? warren & sheridan???? and chris would be like what?????? bc this whole time if wyatt was indeed not the eldest son like are you Fucking Kidding Me????? but no he’s never even heard of warren and sheridan bc in the dark future their powers were simply never unbound and they just continued to live as mortals and may or may not be dead depending on how good the witch finder bots are but like. i don’t think even if wyatt knew they existed he would want to find them bc that just draws attention to the fact they existed and he’s not the firstborn of the next gen so either they’re doing fine-ish all things considered or they just like died lowkey. but chris didn’t even was remotely aware of their existence. and i think this would kinda send prue into a bit of a tailspin bc her boys are so far removed from their legacy and their family (and they’re being raised by jack yikes!!) and she’s like no these are my kids but if she wants to get where they are she either needs to book a fight or find a whitelighter so i think this would specifically be a prue/paige adventure which is also nice bc paige is omnilingual and prue does not speak japanese so like. idk cute adventure. probably use some monster from japanese mythology to save either some smallish town or alternately a major city bc both of those r fun. i think if jack saw prue again he would start throwing things at her and stuff bc he’d be convinced this is some demon here to kill his kids just like they killed her bc haha that’s not a recurring nightmare lmao so i think prue would cast the truth spell right then and there to prove she’s really her which also leads to some good comedy and character development bc jack paige and prue are all under a truth spell and there is a lot unsaid between all of these characters with paige’s inferiority complex and prue and jack’s true feelings for each other and issues caused by prue’s death y’know blah blah blah but i think prue would really use this opportunity to bring warren & sheridan back into the fold so to speak and bring them to the manor and properly train them in the craft and tbh in this specific au i think prue and jack would actually end up together. bc in any other world i’m saying they literally just coparent like they’re fond of each other and will always love the other in like some way but it’s not like Love but i think here specifically it’s like. like the time spent apart where jack just like fucking wishes prue was there and realized what an absolute sap and hopeless romantic he is bc yeah he always like grand gestures and clowning around but like. warren and sheridan’s first steps? and jack was just fucking alone like ngl he almost cried bc he just wished. like prue should have been there. she would have been a great mom. she was a great mom. and his kids deserve their mom and like. he just wishes he could have shared that moment with her. completely unbeknownst to jack prue actually does like you know watch over them all and she’s just like. like blown away by jack. like never in a million years would she have thought he was capable of doing what he did. like. like wow man. and i think the combination of those two like actually having them together again and raising their kids i think romance would blossom again. and i think it would be this insane slowburn bc i think y’know like. like it only happened the first time bc jack pursued prue and was like stubborn and stupid and he like knew she was outta his league but it didn’t matter bc that relationship was just for funsies it was a fling it was never meant to be permanent but if jack were to pursue it know it’s be like. permanent. you know? and jack just doesn’t think prue feels the same way like jack’s a fuckin idiot he knows that and prue’s like a witch? like an insanely talented with and a successful photographer back from the dead don’t worry about it lmao and she just like. she takes the world by storm she balances her career and motherhood and saving the motherfucking world like how could she ever. she would never want to be with someone like jack like that’s just. it’s not in the cards. and prue on the other hand keeps waiting for the penny to drop she keeps waiting for like. jack to realize he doesn’t have to be here anymore. she’s convinced he’s gonna hop town and continue being the man she knew while she was alive now that he doesn’t have to keep watching over the kids now that he’s free in a way but that just never happens because jack doesn’t want to leave like those are his kids also he’s in love with prue lmao but she just can’t. she doesn’t get it. men leave. that’s what they do. that’s what they’ve literally always done she can’t like. she can’t open herself up to something serious only to have jack just ditch and leave her kids with the memory of his back walking out the door so she lowkey starts to push him away put her walls up which only furthers jack’s belief that this is never gonna happen but sometimes it’s like they’ll accidentally fall asleep on the couch together in the middle of the afternoon with the sunlight on them and they’ll wake up like Horribly Embarrassed like oh my god which they’re like this isnt weird okay like we have kids together they’re right there like. we have had sex multiples times before piper walking in on up taking a cat nap in the living room is literally it’s nothing!! oh but it so is something meanwhile phoebe the empath is about to lose her Fucking Shit like guys!!! guys!!!!!!!!! and piper’s just trying to reign her in like no don’t interfere bc piper knows prue’s fear of abandonment and she does not know this new iteration of jack she just remembers what he was like and she doesn’t want to see prue get hurt paige is on the opposite side bc she has literally never met any previous iteration of jack or prue and she’s like hello?? they’re in love?? and chris is like hi okay but like. the task at hand? and the girls are like no shh like trying to covertly spy on prue/jack/warren/sheridan/wyatt all playing in the solarium prue’s doing the telekinetic mobile thing again and jack’s expression of wonder is the same as his sons like !!!! and chris is like deadass i do not get it okay evil wyatt tho. but blah blah blah slow burn i think prue and jack would get married like s8. their wedding would replace paige and henry’s bc as mentioned before paige and henry having a wedding esp a wedding that early was like. dumb. but yeah. prue x jack brainrot. i’m mentally ill i love them so much.

[transwicky]

Fun Rarepairs for everyone:

Tater/Tango (have I mentioned this one before??)

Johnson/Tango (I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL)

Ollie/Johnson/Wicky (THEYD BE SO FUCKING ADORABLE)

Scraps/Guy (I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL ALSO!!)

Thirdy/Guy/Thirdy's Wife (They'd be FUCKING GREAT and the fans would be the. The crazy red string conspiracy board reaction gif/image. It'd be GREAT watching people try to figure their relationship out bc Third and his Wife are MARRIED and are IN LOVE but then WHY DOES GUY AND HIS SON LIVE WITH THEM?!?!)

Tater/Scraps (Tater needs another Ace to fuck besides Kent OK GUYS?!)

Ransom/Tango (Tango would help Ransom with so much work by asking questions ok)

Foxtrot/Lardo

Foxtrot/Shruti

Shruti/Lardo

Foxtrot/Shruti/Lardo (the bad assery would be insane. Nobody would survive them together.)

Shitty/Whiskey (I admit, this one is complete crack)

Chad L/Ollie/Wicky (I'm here for the Drama of Bitty finding out his Fellow Seniors are fucking a Lax Bro)

Chad L/Tango (THE DRAMA OF IT ALL IS GREAT OK. Bitty just texts SMH crying about one of the tadpoles is dating not just a Lax Bro but THE Lax Bro WHERE DID HE GO WRONG?! Plus Whiskey finding out his friend is dating his Lax friend and NOT TELLING HIM?! The chaos it will bring is just. *Chef's kiss)

Guy/Tango (a crack ship that I got serious about. Imagine the Drama. It'd be hilarious and also they'd be cute ok.)

Snowy/Tango/Johnson (GOALIES UNITED!!! Especially since I adopted the Tango Is A Goalie headcanon!!! ITS GREAT)

Poots/Tango (3rd Fave Tango Ship. The pure lack of social understanding between the two. To be discussed further if asked)

Snowy/Guy (It'd be FUN and I have a whole ass au idea for it and it has zesty drama of the misunderstanding kind)

Jack/Guy/Bitty (they have a bucket list and he's a single dad. He's game for a one night stand. Then Woops Feelings Got Caught by all 3. Fun. Zesty. Hilarious when you throw in Guy having a kid)

Carly/Guy (The Homophobic Dickbag Aces Player vs The Queer Player Who WILL Kick Your Ass For Being a Homophobe. The Tension. The drama. I'm here for it all. Especially if you take my headcanons of them both being military vets and WORKED TOGETHER in the military. Hate Sex Becomes Real Sex and the enemies to lovers trope. It's FUN and better than Kent/Carly bc of they're on the Rivalry Teams and Kent and Carly are on the same team. Boo. Boring.)

Kent/Carly (still fucking fun and hilarious and I adore it honestly)

Scraps/Carly (Why not.)

Hops/Tango (The pure joy they would get out of sharing things with each other would be amazing. Tango Doesn't Understand Most Anime but he understood Naruto!!! That was fun!! They're too cute together ok)

Shitty/Snowy (I'm basing this off Snowy being so chill when Jack came out. The Discussions they would have... They would both be at multiple protests together supporting the cause. That's how they meet. It's all downhill from there. Jack is Horrified. Bitty finds it hilarious. Lardo gets embarrassed when the 2 go to an art show of hers and they're Embarrassments Ok.)

That's it that's the list. Enjoy the Chaos I have brought with this list.

[firebirdsdaughter]

When you wish you were asleep…

… Watch raws! XD

Actually, I still kind of wish I was asleep. Maybe I’ll grab a nap after this. (-_-)

But on to my children!

In no order and w/ many typos:

Okay, look. Wyzul’s not ‘weak,’ he’s just meant to have essentially the opposite style of Tankjoh. He’s a ‘planner.’ The manipulative, cunning ‘evil genius type.’ Doesn’t mean anyone has to like him, or think he’s a good villain—hell, I promise you I already miss Tankjoh, too—but he’s not ‘weak.’ He just has a different style. His plan this week was actually rather clever.

Sorry. Wanted to get that off my chest. I miss Tankjoh, too, but I actually like that they followed him w/ a general w/ an opposite style, that the one time Tankjoh kind of tried it, it got him killed (the plan w/ the Cerberus Minusaur).

XD TOUWA. Oh, honey. Who put you in the back? ^^

Knowing the twist makes this whole thing all the more hilarious, somehow.

Though this plan was actually rather clever! If Cardena hadn’t had a few slips in her words… Though admittedly, she was so clearly anxious about it that Banba and/or Melto might have caught onto something anyway, but… It was close.

Banba’s become naturally suspicious, so he may have doubted them anyway, but… It could’ve worked.

Poor Touwa’s so short. And even Banba is kinda hiding in the back there! XD

Other facts about Banba: Google Earth, always taking pics.

Ah, yes, we’re sneaking in. Let us yell, loudly! XD Ah, Toku…

Odd place to keep things, honestly…

There’s something incredibly goofy about the fact that this confrontation is taking place in a cramped stairwell…

They forgot the little men for Banba and Touwa’s transformations. XD

Everyone else is in the middle of fighting a Drunn. Banba has alreday freaking killed his. ><

I think Touwa just asked Wyzul to repeat himself bc they didn’t catch it the first time. And Asuna just figured it out? Uncertain.

Wait. Waitwaitwaitwaitwait. I guess it’s Pink??? But she looks purple???

Curse my inability to put an image in the middle of a bulleted list! Curse my attachment to bullet points! DX

I’ll put it at the bottom?

Touwa here, stealing the monster’s lines. XD

Rip unnamed Drunn.

I’m confused as to whether Cardena was trying to tip them off, or just conflicted and getting anxious. Most likely the latter, as she didn’t seem to understand they’d figured it out later.

My watching experience is foiled once more by how INCURABLY BEAUTIFUL TATSUYA IS! DX

Now she’s getting the hairy eyeball from both big brother/dad and mom. XD Deception check failed.

Is that a thing?

They are dunking on this man so hard. I mean, he doesn’t seem to mind, but…

I really hope that smirk really was just Tatsuya and wasn’t planned. I like how they had trouble getting the ‘towel scene’ (a line ad libbed by Simon Pegg) bc Zachary Quinto kept laughing, so they just went w/ a scene where he jus barely smirks and they cut away real fast. This is smaller, scale, of course, it’s very low key and I only noticed it bc I am almost always watching Banba in any given scene, but it’s funny to think it was unscripted.

Aw, I thought Dad was an alright singer. Also, love Ui’s face here. ^^ And she tries to comfort him, such a sweetheart.

Aw, Touwa also looks like he’s finding it cute, too. ^^ I’m still thinking of Touwa and Ui as the ‘babies’ of the fam. Resident youngest sibs. :)

Nah, Banba doesn’t trust this situation enough to start stabbing people, don’t worry, Kou.

Pretty sure he’s just looking for an excuse to leave, actually.

Melto takes the opportunity to go full mom friend.

Banba’s like ‘so one of you was paying attention.’

There’s never any indication here if Touwa figured it out, too. I’m inclined to think he didn’t? But I don’t know.

Why must Tatsuya persist in being so attractive??? DX

Okay, guess it’s confirmed they can call Ui from the braces. … How. Did they program her number into them? Is there some frequency that they tapped her phone into?

Also, largely unrelated, but Ui is really pretty. She really is. She makes goofy faces sometimes, but this actress is really beautiful. I’m love her. ^^

She’s jack awful at lying, though.

Though it is justified that no one caught on, here. How would Wyzul know how modern human technology works? And Cardena’s an alien. And neither of them know Ui very well. She could be like this all the time for all they know.

But also… Did Melto text her? How did she know to leave her phone?

I say Cardena didn’t catch on bc she doesn’t seem to have realised that they knew later.

Tall Cheese seems to be having a good time hamming it up, and that is valid of her.

Really, though. There’s no way they would have actually released Tall Cheese, if this had worked. That’s not Short Cheese’s fault, she didn’t have many options, but I highly doubt Wyzul intended to honour any sort of deal.

I realise I shamefully remembered Short Cheese’s name in the rest of this post. Whoops. I’d go back and fix it, but now it’s funny… ^^;

Oh, yeah. And this explains why Tall Cheese was looking so evil in those photos.

So… Was Wyzul actually just sitting chained up in the park the whole time?

But also… Wyzul is a shapeshifter. Toei, would you mind…? >:)

Synchronised staring at Kou. XD

Oh, yeah. Moment of appreciation for Tatsuya sitting on the bloody playground equipment like a freaking model.

Banba going for a low blow, there. But he has a point.

And… Kou hits a button. We’ve only really seen Banba be this angry when yelling at Crayon the Mushroom Man about curing Touwa, I think… Makes me wonder if the betrayal he suffered happened in a situation like this? He took a risk for someone in a similar fashion, but it turned out they were lying and stabbed him in the back? Like, loosely similar, maybe. Like… Kou’s reaction clearly hits a nerve.

GAH! Toei, give me more to go on! DX

He backs down, though. Either bc he’s still soft for sibling relationships and can’t help it, or he’s getting soft about Kou—or both. This makes me think even more that he’s never killed anyone before. For all his apparent willingness to do so, in the end he can’t got through w/ sacrificing someone like that.

Esp not when considering it while staring into Kou’s sad puppy eyes.

As Touwa mysteriously vanishes from the shot, despite being exceedingly close by a moment ago.

Though… Banba seeing the fact that Kou et al. being willing to sacrifice what’s important to them for what’s important to others… And seeming kinda effected by that… Is kinda fuel for my ‘he ends up trying to protect their innocence/kindness’ idea? In, like… A ‘I’m the expendable one’ kinda way? Not exactly, but… Augh, explaining is hard. I’m sure I’ll think of one later. DX

Like… Could lead to a moment later where he tries to sacrifice himself/something so that they don’t have to? Or forcibly decides to be the sacrifice for something.

Oh, boy, that sounded weird.

Tyramigo is adorable, and will be the death of me.

Tyramigo be like ‘Is this the bomb I’m meant to eat?’ Then checks w/ Kou just to be sure. ‘Eat the bomb? Okay, eat the bomb!’

Him going ‘aaaaaaaah’ like a little baby, he’s so cute. DX

And how it awkwardly cuts out when she says ‘don’t.’ XD

HOW DID SHE NOT CATCH ON? Either her lysing skill improved significantly, or she completely misunderstood Kou’s nod here.

HOW DID HE SWALLOW HE HAS NO THROAT. O_o

They are dunking this poor man so hard… But, like, he’s listed as a special guest star, so I guess he doesn’t mind, and he seems happy, but… XD

Banba in the back: Google Earth, always taking pics.

Actually, that’s him at any given moment, really.

So… Were those copies of them, too?

Kou, you do not get to call people ‘baka.’ You are the baka!

I don’t actually know what he said. Could have been a different word.

Where were they hiding? Did they hang off the edge of the roof? Stairwell?

Banba not only refuses to smile, he sighs like he’s only there under duress.

He maintains his carefully practiced grumpy face for the whole scene, too. XD

Aw, I think Touwa just said ‘we barely did anything.’ Honey, I watched the flashback, you were the other person making copies.

Synchronised brother head tilt. Seriously, they’re at exactly the same angle. Ah, family. XD

Touwa loves it, Banba is required by contract to keep glaring.

His little awkward looking at the ground after, like ‘shit they’re cute’ what do I do??’… ^^ XD <3

They did do great, though. Plus he knew they’d never leave him alone if he didn’t do something there. XD But he is getting fond of them. Will probably be in denial until something happens and then have a freak out. Maybe it won’t even be that big, maybe it will just be Gold shows up and he finds himself getting protective. But I like big. ^^

Oh, please let Gaisoulg be who I hope it it… >.<

Aaaah! They’re so pretty! DX

So… Is it still a Minusaur if it didn’t come from a human?

What’s this? Minusaur is evolving!

Wait… So so they all turn into dragons when they complete????

I guess they didn’t tell her how Minusaurs actually work.

MAH BABIES!

How did we get down on the ground? Who knows. Toku.

The others go w/ proper combat Souls. Touwa and Kou use the balloon Soul and the shiny Soul. At least one of those kinda makes sense.

Aw, she’s self conscious. ^^

What I think I love most is that she’s clearly putting conscious effort into being out of tune. Which she can do bc the actress actually knows how to sing. XD

Asuna playing the drums is SO CUTE. I’M GONNA DIE.

I love how Melto explaining implied the brothers asked.

And the fact that you can just hear her in the background through the whole scene.

I realise it was Wyzul impersonating her, but it seems like something he might pick up from the real her to make it more believable. Plus Short Cheese had a a name for it, making it more likely.

Gods love her, she’s putting so much effort into it.

Banba briefly checking on Touwa when he rejoins them. ^^ I love this family.

Short Cheese thanks everyone, and the kids smile, but Banba gets embarrassed. XD

Oh dear. Wyzul knows we’re in a TV show…

Ui playing the demanding voice instructor is ADORABLE. XD

Kou and Melto in the corner imitating Banba. XD

Next week, looks like Melto is piloting Kishiryu Oh alone, Biker Dad returns (as an illusion), and the kids get stuck in Wonderland when Banba turns his back on them for five minutes.

I’m kidding, I don’t actually know if his subplot is at all related to Wonderland. All it says is that he’s dealing w/ an ‘antiques dealer.’ I have this wild theory that what the summary means is that ‘Wonderland’ is inside a box (the chest that’s referenced in the title and is the goal of the ‘attraction’), and then Banba also ends up chasing it around. Alternatively, he could just end up in a situation where he’s wandering around like ‘have you seen five brightly dressed dork children? I left them right here, but I looked away for one minute and they all disappeared.’ Or he doesn’t know at all. The magazine did say something about him doing things alone… Maybe he’ll get himself into trouble and they’ll have to come save him in episode 10. I mean, we know he’s gonna get a plot about not doing everything himself eventually.

I’ll leave everyone w/ this thought: the shapeshifting Druidon general now knows where the Tatsuis live.

That’s all, folks! Virtual rock candy for anyone who read all that. Excited for next week. I hope we get episode summaries for the next few eps, soon, as that might give me more of an idea as to whether I was actually right. I like the idea of Banba chasing a box that may or may not have his younger siblings in it around the city and drama that could ensue. But they could go other ways w/ this subplot. Like… Maybe the antiques dealer is the hooded person? Or Banba is trying to investigate the hooded person? Or it’s Gaisoulg (please be who I want you to be, Gaisoulg!)? Or an early cameo of Gold? Or a Druidon? Or a completely inconsequential side character. Who knows.

Oh, yeah! Purple chibi!

Though… I guess it’s Pink? It… It looks purple, though… Wait. Could it be… Magenta?

[singingaboutwishingx]

Warning: Spoilers for S4E09 and S4E10 of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Hi, lovelies, and welcome back to Bianca Spills the Tea (now in italics!). Today I’ll be talking about the above episodes of CXG (TBH this is basically me live-tweeting these episodes because I’m watching them for the first time)

S4E09

- The boom dude in the theme song omg d y i n g

- I actually really like Skylar Astin’s portrayal of Greg! I was definitely on the fence about the casting decision when I first heard it bc I LOVED Santino Fontana, but Skylar has won me over

- SAUCEMERGENCY/TASTROPHE/POCALYPSE I’M DEAD 

- ^^^  If you haven’t figured out by now, I love callbacks

- Nathaniel is trying to be nice and I’m PROUD OF HIM (and he can still get it) 

- I love Rebecca’s lil braid during the date scene! It’s so cute!

- FRED ARMISEN YOU’RE DOING GREAT SWEETIE

- I’m just waiting for the small Nathaniel/Greg friendship to crash and burn and I fear that moment (White Josh is me and I am White Josh)

- WE SHOULD DEFINITELY NOT HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW WE SHOULD DEFINITELY NOT HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW

- Todrick Hall is KILLING IT YESSS

- Look, this whole Darryl vs. Bert thing, while understandable, is cringy. Both of you be adults and have a goddamn conversation (which I’m sure will happen at the end of the episode but I need it now)

- In the same vein, thank god for Paula’s Mom Yelling Voice

- Maya’s “confession” is ME AF AND HER BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL ABOUT RACHEL BLOOM AT THE TONY’S IS EVERYTHINGGGGG

- I love you, Elated Cat. I’m proud of you.

- When they both showed up at Rebecca’s house, I heard John Mulaney say “The other shoe just dropped.”

- HEY SEXY STRANGER I’LL BE RIGHT BACK I JUST FORGOT TO DO THE DISHES

- You know I didn’t know Megan Amram could sing but she’s good! Also any TGP writer has a special place in my heart

- JACK DOLGEN AS THE DOG LMAO

- You know, this show’s done a lot of weird things (the Textmergency song, the Santa Ana Winds, etc), but the cats take the cake. I just... don’t even know what to say about it other than that I love it a lot but it’s insane

S4E10

- Hebecca is such a cutie awww I love her!!

- But I hate her name. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Darryl, you should have taken them up on that 24 hour grace period to change her name.

- BABE AND MAMA COOKIE I’M CRYING REBECCA AND PAULA FRIENDSHIP I LOVE IT DSJDFHSJKALSJFKLSAS

- Even when she’s crying Hebby is adorable I love her and I would die for her

- And good for you, Greg. Talking about your feelings is v important so I’m glad you’re doing it 

- Have I mentioned that I love when this show breaks the fourth wall? Because I love when this show breaks the fourth wall

-^^^ in this case it’s Heather saying “I’ve never seen your living room before.”

- Also people calling their partners by their last name makes me w e a k (idk why but I just love it) so Nathaniel asking when “Bunch” was going to be here was everything

- Y’all I’m screaming Valencia said “If you ruin this, I’ll kill you and throw your corpse into a river.”

- I really don’t know how I feel about Rebecca and Greg getting back together (I’m sure she’ll have moments like this with Nathaniel and Josh, too, but... I have mixed feelings about all of it)

- I do know that she and Josh aren’t endgame, though. We’ve come too far for that

- I forgot for a while that I’m obsessed with Scott Michael Foster’s voice but... I’m obsessed with Scott Michael Foster’s voice (side note-- I just found out that his girlfriend is Penny Pann on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and idk I just thought that was cool)

- Throughout this entire series Rachel Bloom has gotten to make out with like five or six really hot guys and honestly? That’s the acting dream (I’m kidding I promise)

- HECTOR STANNING MINDY KALING IS ME (MINDY IF YOU’RE READING THIS ILY QUEEN)

- I knew as soon as Hector went into the kitchen by himself that there would be some sort of something with Valencia, but for just a tiny moment I thought (irrationally, of course) that Valencia would be hiding in the fridge when he opened it. I don’t even know where that came from

- Sweet, lovestruck Greg is my favorite Greg

- Everyone helping Josh to get that Fett Regoso pic... I live for friends supporting friends

- HERE for Rebecca accepting Hebby

- Oh, sweet Nathaniel. Don’t worry. Your two or three episodes will come.

- Overall, I loved these two episodes! They were sweet and hilarious and reminded me just how much Rebecca is growing. God, I’m so proud of her. I’m proud of all of them! So anyway, thank you so much for reading this. I know it was kind of long but I’m glad that there are some of you who enjoy my thoughts on various shows. Hope you all have a wonderful day! Bye!

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom, season 3 episodes 3-6 thoughts!

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-johnny was actually pretty civil with danny and left when he asked! thats nice. also, SKULKER?? HAD A FRAMED PICTURE OF EMBER?? oooo fuck wait had they established they were a Thing Before?? I dont think so. thats weird. its like that country boy/goth girl meme lmfao. I think i am going to choose to ignore this new info and pretend I didnt hear it. 100% unrelated to the jazz/ember fanart I already drew and posted....😳

-LADIES NIGHT EPISODE THIS IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT. wish it didnt really center around the guys or them being pissed at them, but. willing to bet this was written by men lol

-THEY ERASED ALL THE MEN??? meanwhile, jack and danny are fishing at. silent hill or something. im glad jack is trying to read a parenting book and making an Attempt. (theyre at lake erie, but, they made it actually eerie...thats fun)

-the girls alt outfits...cute. EMBER MADE A NEW SONG TOO!!! kinda. jazz being one of the backup singers and being AWFUL. NOOOO

-'how are we going to get kitty to blow a kiss?' 'she'll have to think there are still some males in town!' ...i dont know how to break it to you, but I dont know that a 100% het girl would wish for all men to Begone. I think. I mean im not a het or a girl so I dont really know for sure. she Is probably Bi tho. esp having the other ladies in town chanting NO MEN!!! excitedly............(then again, the kiss is to get Rid of men, so, she probably would have blown it at the ladies only if they were actively trying to attack/stop them, so...I MEAN. THE DRESSING LIKE DANNY BIT WAS SO EXTRA)

-I feel like an all female cast ep couldve been way way way way cooler than that was. like. why was it still somehow all about Men. ...anyway. (where was valerie...)

-next ep opens with the observants, and, way way more of them than I expected...existed? I mean I guess them being a council/jury of some kind is what I expected from their first appearance (bc at that time they were basically TELLING clockwork to kill danny, not asking,, so I figured they had SOME kind of authority) but. there were so many. anyway, here goes vlad! letting his own hubris go brrrr. releasing a weather ghost for political gain! #justvladthings

-okay say what you will about him (he IS an asshole) but having an umbrella with his own face on it and more prepared to share is SUPER FUNNY. and him being fanned by huge wads of money by his bodyguards. SO ineffective but so Dramatic. He UNDERSTANDS that if youre rich you need to be. you know. obnoxious and kinda eccentric about it! fuckign hate when rich people are boring about it. I would trust vlad with nothing except to not be a boring rich asshole who wears...fucking khaki or some shit. man knows his Presentation Skills. and that 'V' chair in his mayoral office. is that fucking embroidered?

-maddie get your MAN PLEEEEASSSE. IM SO EMBARRASSED FOR HER. the way jack stays simping for this man. in FRONT OF HIS WIFE!!!! ...my god its like a love triangle. jack clearly loves vlad, who loves maddie, who loves jack. jack fenton is at the very least bi, right................. this is an OBSESSION . 'THE V MAN COMETH'???? i...my god. (also, on a serious note, to have a friend THIS SUPPORTIVE...and still be SUCH A DICK TO HIM (TRYING TO KILL HIM AND STEAL HIS WIFE??) NOT COOL VLAD. JACK IS YOUR 1 AND /ONLY/ HYPE MAN. if someone loved and supported me THIS HARD...LIKE. CMON DUDE.

-STOMP the fucking GAS, JACK

-this would make a great shirt design, looks like a metal band design! we love The Maelstrom

-oh, so vlad did in fact get a mansion in amity park. and its purple! good color choice! not as flashy as a CASTLE or MURDER CABIN, but still pretty eccentric, which I appreciate.

-...vlad knows the difference between picasso and da vinci? in the ep last post where we were watching him fail at conquering every historical time ever he didnt seem to know history well enough to like. be effective...was vlad taking art history at college?? (was he an art MAJOR??? we never DID KNOW WHAT HE WENT TO SCHOOL FOR. I kinda assumed business because in the masters of time ep he was still rich without ghost powers so he had to have..known something about business or something, right...but also, art and or theater FITS HIS PERSONALITY. possibly also something science-y, I guess, but I always felt like he got roped into that, esp how pessimistic he was about the ghost portal in the flashbacks to college, like, i felt like he was just there for maddie and was uninterested/un-invested at the time...)

-THIS GHOST JUST ELECTROCUTED MADDIE (THE CAT) BITCH!! THATS MY FAVORITE MADDIE!!! vlad going after vortex and being ~shocked~ .....WHEN. WHEN WILL YOU LEARN. THAT YOUR ACTIONS. HAVE CONSEQUENCES!!!

-the way this random man with a camera sees the mayor laying in an alley covered in TRASH AND DECIDES TO TAKE A PICTURE HAHAH

*snap* this ones going in my cringe compilation!

-vlad 'if we're going to defeat vortex, we're going to have to do it together!' *immediately dips after dropping danny off in front of vortex* JKASDFHKJHJKN

-DANNY CAN DUPLICATE!!! ...he couldnt even attack with it, but he DID IT!!! INTO (4) OF HIMSELF!!! SO PROUD!!!!!!!!!!

-'THE ROLLER COASTER EMOTIONS OF A TEENAGER THREATEN MY PLANS!' ...0 self awareness of his own dramatic moodiness. incredible, how dumb this man is. its very close to circling around to endearing, if he was less of an asshole. at least its very very funny to see danny shooting him with tiny lightning bolts anytime he's even slightly irritated! vlad you should be nice to danny anyway. this is what you GET

-...making sandwiches and ice cream and playing video games with your nephew is a totally normal thing. WHY is vlad acting like this is the end of the world. if you were a GOOD UNCLE YOU WOULD ALREADY BE DOING THESE THINGS!!! bitch I make my nephew food all the time and dont forget what he does and doesnt like. if u didnt know danny didnt want tomatoes, thats on u. if u, a grown adult, are gonna piss of the 14 yr old by not letting him win, u deserve to have to pay for the arcade machines he ruins because he now has uncontrollable storm powers because YOU THREW HIM INTO A FIGHT WITH THE STORM GHOST. fuck u vlad. paypal me $400,000 while ur at it tho. (also, gamer vlad confirmed)

-VLAD CAN COOK THOUGH???! I assumed he had...people working for him that did that. I mean. billionaires usually dont do that. then again, we've only seen those vultures working for him (and I guess the dairy king was AT his old mansion, but it was never really clarified if he worked there...I think he probably just Hung Out and they Enjoyed Cheeses Together. thats what I think, I dont think a KING would be working for anyone and also the dairy king was nice <3) but then again he would be a private person and we cant have anyone accidentally finding Ghostly Things, so...still, that's hilarious. pour one out for that really cute banana split that got ruined 2 seconds later

-vlad just fucking picking danny up and THROWING HIM AT VORTEX TWICE WITHIN LIKE A MINUTE. JUST ABSOLUTELY LAUNCHING HIM. BITCH THATS MY SON BE CAREFUL!!! HES GOT ORGANS AND THINGS!!!!

-danny seeing those animal commercials and feeling sad is the biggest 2000s throwback so far. i legitimately had to change the channel or walk out of the room when those came on bc id CRY AND BE SAD ABOUT THEM FOR DAYS AFTER. fuck those commercials and fuck that IN THE ARMMMS OF AN ANGELLLL song 😭

-'vlads ego almost got the town destroyed!' yes danny thats the entire episode. the entire series anytime vlad shows up honestly. this episode was just him being really embarrassing the entire time, and, me laughing about it. 10/10 would laugh at him again

-NEXT EP WE HAVE A SHAPESHIFTING GHOST?? I've said it before but shapeshifting is the power I would want when asked those 'what superpower do you want' questions...its the Best power! this guy looks like a homestuck character. ive never read homestuck but thats the vibe

-I love every time we see tuckers family, they are by far the most functional family. and dash has a lil chihuahua!!! named pookie!!! i am crying (I've had 3 chihuahuas, so I am very biased, but...) AND HE WATCHES THE ROMANCE CHANNEL WITH POOKIE. POOKIE I WILL DIE FOR YOU YOU SWEET LITTLE BABY.

-danny can lift a bus! I shouldn't be surprised, but i am proud of my son. hes got lil kid fans. i am going to cry about this

-JAZZ KEEPS A SCRAPBOOK WITH DANNY'S LIL HEROICS AND NEWSPAPER CLIPPINGS!!! we've actually seen it on her floor before, but I didnt realize it was a scrapbook!! thats sooo cute.

-...and danny has to stand there listening to his parents saying danny phantom sucks and is a 'filthy ghost' and calling him egotistical...i am once again stealing their kids!

-THIS GHOST RIPPING JAZZ'S SCRAPBOOK!!! ILL KILL YOU. SHE WORKED HARD ON THAT!!! BITCH

-yes, maddie, the one with red eyes is For Sure Actually Your Son. ignore the, red eyes... (CLEARLY she hasnt watched the other 2 eps where danny has been evil, she doesnt know red eyes= evil!!!)

-'billy fenton'.......................

-danny being stuck as phantom in his own house, no way out is a fucking NIGHTMARE. his parents pointing giant weapons against him and SHOOTING AT HIM. THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE.

-NINE INCH NAILS POSTER.

-this is the most screenshot of all time

-amorpho turning into mr. lancer because hes 'someone no one will want to be around' BUT HES WRONG, I WOULD BEFRIEND AND HANG OUT WITH MR LANCER SO FAST.

-tucker dressing as danny, now I have the full Tucker set of him being sam and also being danny. also saying 'the ghost...uh...RIPPED MY FACE OFF.' and then running. SMOOTH. NOT AT ALL CONCERNING TO ANY PARENTS.

-sam accepts the toast from jack. and then 2 seconds later is like 'why am i eating this.' THIS SHOWS HUMOR IS SO UNEXPECTED SOMETIMES ITS REALLY GOOD. and then the scene after, mr lancer running into his ghost doppelganger and being like 'YOURE GORGOUS' THEN FAINTING. I AM CRYING. AND DASH FAINTING TOO.

-sam disguising herself as danny again to help tucker run from the fentons. but leaving him shirtless in the streets. incredible. 'plEASE DOnt NOTice MY FACELessNESS I MUST LIVE IN EXILE' this episode is destroying me the humor in this show is exactly my brand of corny and cheesy

-the impromtu story made up by danny and amorpho to explain stuff to the fentons. my god they are both such bad liars. but amorpho is a good egg. wish danny wouldnt have said he didnt wanna see him in town again!! I want him to be reoccurring. not that thats gonna matter since I'm almost done with the series, but the idea of this being the Only Time We See him is :(

-NEXT EP SAYS STARRING MARK HAMILL??????!!! hello ! mr . joker....mr. star wars.... I feel like I should be. idk. taking off a hat im not wearing in respect. I shouldnt be surprised tho bc hes in a lot of cartoons as a very good voice actor, and dp has already had a lot of talented ones so I've been looking out for ones I might know, but....mr. hamill....

-sam has her own greenhouse, names all the plants, and says thank you to them (in the languages from where the plants are from) whenever she harvests from them. thats SO cute. and her lil gothy lunch box...

-and danny's lil red fuzzy lined jacket!!! ive said it before but every time the characters get alt outfits im like :D

-danny has ice powers now!!! THATS WHAT FROSTBITE MEANT. HE KNEW SOMEHOW WAY BACK THEN

-THIS SHOW NEVER LETS YOU FORGET VLAD IS A BILLIONAIRE, HUH.

-danny's lil 'holy hibiscus!' first off the 50s batman swearing is hilarious. 2nd. my username is from the flower sanchoyo hibiscus, so, shoutout to ME this ep. hi :)

-EURGH UNDERGROWTH MAKING EVERYONE PLANT ZOMBIES. HIVEMIND PLOTS SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME. and this dude made the city SO overtaken so quickly like how long was danny asleep?? oh god

-evil fucked up sam! now the whole trio has gone evil at some point! the voice actress did a really, really good job with making her sound like a zombie...

-frostbite's paws are so so so big compared to danny. oh my god. i want to hug the snow dog...

-the far frozen has an advanced medical stuff!!! very cool. very smart snow dogs

-im so glad danny has a friendly ghost snow dad to explain this new power and teach him!!! this is so sweet. DANNY'S GHOST SENSE WAS A PART OF HIS ICE POWER?? OOOH. COOL. we love a training montage!!!

-danny saying if he cant defeat overgrowth, that he'd want to stay with frostbite...oh my god...do you think this is the first real supportive adult figure in his life (I am NOT counting his parents because they threaten him on the daily even if they dont realize it.) I mean mr lancer is a Teacher, but he was also nice but this is different, but this is a GHOST WHO IS WILLING TO HELP HIM with his powers and also will help him when hes injured and is so so nice and comparatively so much more mature than 90% of the adults in this show!!!! god. dad frostbite is my everything.

-the framing and lighting this episode, and all the angles...they went all OUT and it looks really really good. this is my nightmare scenario, tho. like, FUCK zombies and dead city zones and hivemind shit. and using the humans as 'nutrients for the children' i am going to THROW UP.

-MALEFICENT VIBES WITH THE HORNS AND GREEN EYES! this costume kicks so much ass. sam is now mark hamills daughter, I guess.

-danny's ice powers making his eyes blue!!! thats neat. and him going for the roots underground was SO SMART. i will not stand for danny ever thinking hes stupid, hes SO smart.

almost done with the show... :"( thats a sad thought!!!