#beat schlatt

[themuddypig]

I just think the Science Man who was once The Grim Reaper and also has an unusual relationship with sheep should win another round. I know he’s gonna get smooshed by Scar in round 3, but that’s ok ...  vote here: https://t.co/b5xP6TFeks

[cxyotl]

if schlatt were in the apocalypse he’d be a lil bitch about it. hes all bark and no bite. he’d see a zombie and start whimpering like a scared little animal. HOWEVER. c!schlatt would just girlboss it up and die when the sirens start.

[embracedfire]

Literally cannot stop thinking about the slimecicle cinematic universe

[cyncerity]

Cyncerity!!!

The lore you dropped on the karlnapity (avian Q and borrower Karl) au!? You were really just gonna hide that in the TAGS!?

Now I have to know more 👀

And as always, beautiful work on your art! They look amazing!

AAAHHHH TY!! This is an au i’ve had for longer than i’ve had tumblr so i love talking about it lol

^(these are the tags mentioned btw)

there’s actually a post that’s now over two years old that goes into a little more angst linked here >:)

anyway two years ago i was trying to be all cryptic and stuff but i’ve had this in the back of my head for a while now so here’s Q’s story:

He was part of a borrower colony when [REDACTED] happened (if you scroll through the first tag under this post you’ll see “[redacted]” mentioned a lot because it’s the catalyst for this au, so i’m not willing to give that one up yet ;] ). He and his sister (his only family) were kidnapped by humans. He was separated from her and sold because his wings were pretty. He was handled poorly and mistreated by his human owners as they tried to force him to learn aerial tricks and make him a show bird of sorts. Humans in this au don’t know about borrowers (borrowers in this world are all tiny hybrids except for like one really weird exception but we can talk about him later) so the humans who bought Q found him on the dark web and we’re planning to show him off to the world and get rich and famous and shit off of him. However, Q found out he was a shifter, which is just a magic trait that some people pick up (i’m thinking of giving it a correlation to something but i haven’t decided yet). Q didn’t really know what was happening, one moment he was in his cage and the next he was free, but he took advantage of it.

The family that owned him wasn’t home. He ransacked their house, looking for anything that he’s noticed was important to human society. He grabbed bags full of clothes, valuables, food; anything he could sell or use in a human society and took off. Eventually he found a town far away and managed to find a cheap apartment that he could pay the first few month’s rent for only by selling the valuables he’d stolen. He bound his wings and found a job, beginning a normal human life.

how he met Schlatt and how Schlatt became his other “human” roommate, however, is a much longer story than I can’t fit onto this post.

[sardonic-the-writer]

Thinking about him hours

[fellafell-anthony]

Jschlatt and Malcolm graves?I propose to you my case study

he is the perfect reference for drawing Graves. (close ups below)

[superkitten-poison]

on the topic of cwilbur not respecting cquackity i'd like to offer this clip from nikis birthday party that makes me chew my arm off. @viceduo

[Transcript:

Wilbur singing to Quackity: I can't fucking stand you. But you're still really hot-

Karl: True!

Wilbur: (unintelligible) me with all your indecisive little bullshit actions.

Quackity (annoyed): Okay-

Wilbur: You are the perfect one for me... if you promised you'd never speak and you'd just stand there in my room looking pretty.

Karl: ... Wow.

End of transcript.]

[apollos-boyfriend]

Taps at ur enclosure*

Icarus talk w/ me abt Schlarkles

they are so silly to me to imagine in-canon. because okay. you have schlatt, who's this super over-confident guy who thinks himself on top of the world. everyone should listen to his every word and command because he's obviously the smartest and most powerful person present. and then you have jordan, who's kind of an anxious wreck on the best of times, has like 4 close friends max, and needs to be dragged to any social event ever. he constantly apologizes for merely existing. if i asked you which one was the badass hero who saved the entire multiverse and which was the cringefail businessman who has never succeeded on a business scheme once. i do not think you would get it right. they drive me absolutely crazy insane <333

[thinkingnot]

the day Thomas Tomska Ridgewell and Tom Tommyinnit Simons interact is the day i explode

[lunarmothsystem]

I think I'm finally in a space I could write this pumpkin duo au I've had in my brain for a long time!

[bigtstreaming]

my renaissance question mark

[lacystar]

rewatching the niki love or host to prepare for mine and. holy fuck. bob7 is just. the worst.

[argcicle]

so a big bonding thing between grizzly and tommy is that grizzly will fly with tommy, they both enjoy the moments in the sky as they cling to each other. grizzly loves that he’s not really in danger, and after months of being immortal, tommy enjoys that he is.

that makes it really easy to lure tommy in, when schlatt appears on the path to the lava pool tending to a tree that should not and could not exist in this hellish realm. he talks a little bit about the sky, the freedom of it, and his target is hooked. it’s easier to get tommy to eat an apple, promising that it would give him wings at no cost.

tommy feels light the entire run home, but when he enters the little hut his body flushes. he collapses right there, and grizzly knows what happened the second he sees the blood-stained feathers falling from the blond’s back.

[sunshinetrinket]

i only even remember sending like 1 chat message i have no idea what the other 10 were and it scares me

[natspats]

“it was love at every sight.”

(quote: della hicks-wilson)

thank you ⁉️anon for the inspo for this story! ☺️

thank you for reading and enjoy! xx 💋

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ⋆ ˚ ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ⋆

schlatt groaned.

he didn’t understand why they had to bring this random chick onto the podcast. why couldn’t they have someone on that they BOTH knew?

ted had known her for about a year and a half, and they were best friends. but schlatt would be lying if he said he wasn’t a little bit jealous of their relationship.

ted had always been close with schlatt, but when the name “y/n” started being thrown around, he felt a pang of jealousy.

he didn’t even know what she looked like, he didn’t bother to look her up on any social media. he didn’t care much for this “y/n” girl.

ted caught onto this attitude of course and had been on his ass about being nice to her. “fake it till you make it!”, is what he had kept telling him. and-

“i’m not fake, i’m the real deal!” is what schlatt dramatically scoffed in response.

however, he decided it wouldn’t look very good on him if he was being rude to a girl in front of thousands of people.

so, he shoved his protests deep down inside, put on his regular persona, and decided to just get the episode over with.

as schlatt sat in the booth of their studio, ted was hurrying around, making the final arrangements to begin the session, when he suddenly stopped in front of schlatt.

“she’ll be here soon, are you ready?” ted arched a brow and stuck his crossed arms in front of his chest.

“do we haveeee tooooo?” schlatt sunk into his seat like a 3 year old in protest over not getting a toy at the store.

“yes schlatt we do, it’s too late to back out.”

“BUT I TRIED TO BACK OUT AND YOU WOULDN’T LET ME!” schlatt cried whilst kicking his feet.

“i owe her, and it’ll be good publicity to have an up and coming on the pod.” ted drops his arms.

“what do you have against her anyways? you haven’t met her, no?”

schlatt would never admit to being jealous. thus, he contemplated the correct response.

“uh- well- i don’t know her. and uh- you know her so well, so i think it’ll be awkward.” schlatt mumbled.

“it won’t! i promise. she’s very easy to get on with.” ted smiles with a pat on his shoulder.

“and who knows, maybe you might like her!”

“yeah right.”

bzzz bzzz

ted jumps and picks his phone up from off the table, swiftly checking it.

“she’s here! be right back.” he walks to the exit before turning around and pointing a finger at the mutton chopped man.

“best behavior young man!”

schlatt puts his arms up in surrender. “relaxxxx. you have nothing to worry about.”

ted swings the door open and mumbles as he walks out, “you better be right about that.”

best behavior? best behavior??

yeah right.

he was going to have EXCELLENT behavior.

he was going to prove ted wrong.

schlatt absentmindedly scrolled through his phone until he heard voices approaching the door. and once the door opened, his eyes shot up.

“here we go.” he thought to himself as he sat up from his toddler-esque slump.

the door clicked open, and in walked ted with-

oh.

oh.

suddenly the whole world around schlatt stopped.

he felt his throat get tight.

his heart began to race.

his palms got all sweaty.

did he look ok?

everything around him got all fuzzy, and she was the only clear thing to him.

she.

who was she?

“earth to schlatt?” ted waved his hands in front of schlatts face.

suddenly he was taken out of his trance.

“yeah-sorry, what?”

ted looked at him with a look mixed with suspicion and confusion.

“this is y/n!” ted presents her to him.

y/n reaches her hand out for him to shake.

“hi, it’s so nice to finally meet you! ted has told me lots much about you.” she beamed at him. schlatt takes her hand and shakes it.

among all of the scattered, racing thoughts in his head, one of the only thoughts that were clear to him was that her hands were soft.

a beat of silence passed before schlatt realized he needed to respond. he looked into her eyes and the faintest, but most genuine smile appeared on his face.

“it’s nice to finally meet you too.”

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about 45 minutes into the podcast, things were going great- at least in ted’s standards. he was worried schlatt was going to be a prick to her, but he actually had excellent behavior.

that was mainly because throughout the podcast, schlatt had been talking, but not as much be usually would be. and that’s because he was too busy taking in her all in.

it was like he was in a desert and she was his only water source.

he didn’t understand why he felt this way.

he hadn’t felt this was on any of the zoom calls full of girls on the love or host episodes.

he hadn’t felt this way for anyone, not even minx.

schlatt thought he was ok with not being in love or being in a relationship, but apparently he wasn’t?

not to mention, his behavior was unlike his usual self, so it was very noticeable during the recording.

schlatt was beginning to feel that pang of jealously, however, not of y/n. but of ted, and how close he was with her.

as schlatt sat there in his lovestruck trance, he was once again broken out of it by the sound of a soft voice.

“j?” she raised a bow with a confused smile.

J?

J?!?!??!?!

his heart beat faster at that nickname and his cheeks flushed red. why the fuck was he freaking out? it was literally just his name. but nobody has ever called him J before. and-

“sorry, what’s up?”

ted snorted at this, beginning to catch on to this behavior from his dear friend.

and she just let her brows fall into a worried position, all the while keeping a smile plastered across her face.

“i said,” a light blush spreading across her cheeks, “do you think you would ever go on another love or host episode? i was asked by austin recently to have a go at it.”

his heart stopped for a split second.

for some reason, he couldn’t bare the thought of other guys having a chance with her. but then again, what if he was a contestant? what if he had a chance to win her over? what if-

“hmmmmmmmm. i suppose it depends on who id be competing for.” schlatt leaned back in the booth, manspreading.

“i second that.” she points in schlatt’s direction.

ted grins. (mwahahaha type grin)

“you know,” ted leans towards y/n, “i’m sure if you went on, schlatt would be a contestant.” ted flashes a shit eating grin at schlatt.

schlatt turns red and flashes him a look of “oh my fucking god i’m going to fucking kill your fucking dumbass.”

quickly recovering, schlatt scoffs with a “yeahhh righttt. i barely know this broad!”

“yeah well, im sure you’ll know each other well enough soon.” ted smirks and busts out laughing by himself.

what was he doing??

twitter was going to go feral.

schlatt glances over and accidentally makes eye contact with her. but surprisingly, she holds it.

and in the midst of the ugly laughter from their shared best friend, a big, genuine smile, spreads across their cheeks.

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after the episode is wrapped up and everyone is getting ready to leave, schlatt is sitting back at the booth on his phone.

he looks up from his phone and immediately feels his heart beat hard again.

y/n had walked up to him.

“so uh- i was thinking.” she looks down at her feet, that are rocking back between her toes and heels, then back up at him.

“i was thinking we could make a good team to gang up on ted. y’know- get revenge for today.” she’s wearing a small smile, one that suggests that she’s nervous.

schlatt nervousness falters at this and pushes up his confidence to try to make her feels better.

“i was actually thinking the same thing.”

“great minds think alike.” she lets out a giggle.

“right right. well then, you’re going to have to give me your number toots so that we can have a constant source of communication. all good teams communicate after all, right?”

and with that, they exchanged numbers, a smile , and she went back to her hotel.

ted locked the studio, and the pair made their way out to schlatt’s corvette.

and finally.

finally, ted got something out of his system he’d been waiting alllllll day to get out.

“told ya you’d like her.”

[slxtmeri]

imagine going to a bar with schlatt, purposely flirting with other people in an attempt to make him jealous which results in him teaching you a lesson when you get home. or in the toilets.

THANK YOU FOR THIS CHARLIE I LOVE YOU.

a/n: meri wrote a fic? wtf wtf wtf wtf

thank you for 200 followers!!

cw: smut, choking, pet names, oral + fingering (fem receiving), afab!reader, unprotected sex, creampie, etc.

jealous? ~ schlatt

it had taken you a while to finally convince your boyfriend, but the two of you were finally on your way. sitting in the backseat of the uber you had ordered for the two of you, schlatt was finally starting to warm up to the idea.

in your words, you and schlatt didn't "let loose" enough. so now, here you are, on your way to the new, invite-only bar that had recently opened in the town the two of you lived in.

"c'mon, jay, it'll be fun!" you say, leaning on his shoulder.

"yeah, maybe. as long as the booze is good." he says reluctantly. you smile up at him, used to his antics.

"ted didn't get us invites just for you to be ungrateful! just try to enjoy yourself." you plant a kiss on his cheek and a small smile adorns his face.

"of course, doll."

the uber arrives at your location and you go through security fairly easily. you both walk in and greet your friends charlie and ted, then head off to explore the rest of the bar.

it was crowded, with people dancing and swaying along to the beat of the music. you and schlatt make yourselves comfortable in one of the secluded corners of the bar.

"i'm gonna go and grab us some drinks, okay?" he says, turning towards you and pointing towards the bar.

you hum, acknowledging his words and he walks away in the direction of the bar. suddenly, you see a man who looked to be in his early twenties walking up to you.

"hey, gorgeous, you alone tonight?" he says with a wink, not waiting for your answer as he slides into the spot that schlatt was previously standing in. you were ready to get up and walk away, but you see schlatt at the bar, watching the two of you as he waits for your drinks.

this could be a lot of fun, you think, turning towards the man.

"what's your name, sweet cheeks?" he says, facing you.

you inwardly cringe at the man's choice of words as you study his features. he seemed to be much shorter than jonathan, with blond hair that swept down over his eyes.

"what's yours?" you ask, tilting your head and batting your eyelashes purposefully so that schlatt would see your mock attempts at flirting.

"jake, now it's your turn to tell me yours, little miss." he states, reaching over and playing with a loose strand of your hair. you step back, away from him and turn your attention to your boyfriend. at this point, you see schlatt in your peripheral vision, visibly fuming. he walks away from the bar, your drinks forgotten.

"uh, well you see-" you begin, but were cut off as schlatt reaches the area and begins to talk.

"who is this guy, babe? some college dropout trying to catch your attention?" he says with a scowl, displeasure evident on his face.

oh shit, you thought, maybe this wasn't such a great idea.

you plaster a nervous smile onto your face and begin to speak, but once again you were cut off.

"i'm jake. who are you? i thought this pretty lady was alone tonight." he says with a cocky smirk.

schlatt steps towards you and slides an arm around your waist. your heart is beating fast, knowing that he's upset.

"listen here, punk. this girl is mine, and she's not interested in puny guys like you." he seethes as he towers over the smaller man.

"w-well, she doesn't seem to mind my company. we were just talking is all, man. can't blame a guy for talking to a pretty girl." he stammers, putting his hands up and backing away.

"yeah, well she's even prettier with her legs open and eyes rolled back, but i guess you'll never get to see that, huh?" schlatt scowls and drags you towards the opposite end of the bar.

"jay, i didn't mean to-" you begin, shocked at the exchange of words between the two men.

"shut up, dollface. let's teach you a lesson, hmm?" he says, finally finding the bathroom and pulling you inside.

he locks the door and walks towards you until your back is hitting the wall, with nowhere else to walk.

"what were you trying to do out there? flirting with another guy so i'll get jealous? guess what, sweetheart. it worked." he seethes, wrapping a hand around your throat and squeezing, eliciting a strangled moan from you.

"pl-please, jay. was only playing." you stutter out, jolts of pleasure running through your core.

he only laughs and leans down to kiss you on the lips. the kiss is full of passion and lust, and his tongue explores your mouth with heat.

his free hand travels to the straps of your mini dress, easily pulling it down, leaving you in your underwear.

he breaks the kiss to lift you up by your thighs and push you against the wall, dropping to his knees.

"be a good girl and stay quiet, ok? don't want the fancy members of this bar hearing your slutty noises." he hums, pulling your panties down and settling your legs over his shoulders.

you stifle a moan that threatens to spill from your lips as he slips in two digits, pumping them into your tight cunt with no prep.

"fuck, jay. s-slow down." your back arches as he stretches you out on his thick fingers, your eyes shutting out of instinct.

"look at me, slut." he harshly squeezes your thigh with his free hand and your eyes snap back open, eyes on his face.

"you're so fucking wet, baby. you getting off of the idea of me getting jealous, huh?"

he lowers his head and flicks his tongue around your swollen clit, drawing out an almost pornagraphic moan from you.

he continues to finger you and suck on your bundle of nerves until you slowly begin feel that ball of pleasure in your core tighten.

you try to buck your hips but he stops you, holding you down.

"please! p-please, m'gonna come, jay." you cry, throwing your head back onto the wall.

as soon as you tell him this, though, he stops. he pulls out his fingers and stands up, lifting you up with him.

you immediately whine at him, but he just wraps his hand around your throat again, shutting you up.

"this is a punishment, not a reward. be a good girl and maybe i'll let you come, yeah?" he says, placing you on the bathroom sink and kissing you once more.

you moan into the kiss and reach up to grab a fistful of his hair, making him groan and pull away, quickly unbuckling his belt and pulling out his cock.

you turn around and face the mirror, ass on display for him.

he strokes himself before lining himself up and pushing into you, making you both moan out.

soon enough, you've both forgotten about staying quiet, and he's pounding into you while you're moaning and squealing out his name.

"th-that asshole could never fuck you like this, baby. only me." he groans into your ear as he pistons into you at a brutal pace.

"m'only yours daddy. fuck, only yours." you're moaning out, back arching as one of his hands toys with your nipple.

once again, you feel yourself teetering at the edge, biting your lip and squeezing your eyes shut out of pleasure.

"jay, please. please, need to come. only for you daddy, please." you sob out, your eyes filling with tears.

"go ahead and come, doll. such a good girl." his hips continue their brutal pace as pleasure overtakes your senses.

you're moaning out his name as you clench around him, and his hips stutter moments after. he fills you with his come and slowly pulls out, breathing heavily.

after you both recover, he's turning you around to face him.

you look up at him with fucked out eyes and he caves, pulling you in for a sweet kiss.

"what was that guy's name again?" he asks you with a smirk on his face.

"uhm, i don't remember... blake, maybe?" you say sheepishly, looking up at the love of your life with a smile.