#because I am once again tired

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

[specialability]

September has been. a lot.

(cut for long ranting/venting below, possible tw about fleas, health issues, disability, and housing stuff)

preparing for disability approval hearing after 2.5 years of waiting

suddenly, disability office decides to approve me without even doing the hearing

this is great, I am going to get more money. not a liveable amount of money. but more money.

including back pay for the 2.5 years which is a substantial chunk of change

I buy myself a new mouse to replace my broken one and a new phone case to replace the 3 year old one. splurging!!

my year-old referral to the psychiatric hospital went through also and now I have multiple appointments to get set up

now that I have a bit more money I should finally buy a bedframe. yanno after 2.5 years of mattress on floor. which I don't mind but it's cold in winter.

after multiple attempts finally organize to get a bed off kijiji. ask roommate if she will borrow her mother's car to pick it up, she says yes

find a couple fleas on my cat. panic mode. go get flea killer the next day and talk to the vet

wash and clean everything. like 5 loads of laundry in one day. exhausted.

got to borrow a handheld steamer from a friend-of-a-friend to try and kill any remaining flea eggs on the couch/mattress but means I gotta make a pretty big trip to pick it up. it's raining and cold, and I'm so low brain I keep making stupid mistakes, but I do go to a Value Village and find some stuff I needed so it works out

also still got more psych appointments

and a physio appointment I'm really nervous about because I've never been to this place before and it's about vaginal problems

go to physio appointment and nobody is wearing a mask, lady coughs on me in the waiting room, doctor is running late, their receptionist is out because her mom died, place is a mess. the physio himself is great but can't do the exact treatment I need so not going back.

but gotta go pick up the bed!

right before going to pick up the bed roommate is coughing and sneezing so I ask if she's sick again

she gets mad at me and suddenly we're in a huge argument about all the stuff she hates about living here and how she thinks I'm a weirdo loser who just sits around all day and I should be grateful she even stays here etc.

while I had already been thinking about telling her she should move out in a month or two because her constant complaining about every aspect of her very boring normie life is driving me crazy.

(please don't complain about "only" making 40k+benefits working from home to someone who had an 8k income last year and has relied on gifts and dwindling savings to get by. it's like complaining about the champagne not being chilled to someone dying of thirst. you're allowed to complain, just find someone else to complain to!)

this is after we had an argument in August and I told her if she was going to hate living here she should move out now so I could get a student for Sept and she said no she'd stay until spring...

so she tries to one-up me by saying she doesn't want to pay October rent and I'm like ok no problem I'll use your deposit and don't worry about the bed I'll handle it by myself :) and she storms off

it is actually laughable how bad she was at trying to hurt my feelings. I was deeply bullied in school and my parents argued constantly, calling me a loser because I don't go out of the house is kiddie level stuff, it just slides right off.

(I will concede there are a couple valid criticisms in her complaints but repeatedly I offered solutions she didn't want to take. and I don't like her or respect her enough to apologize.)

picking up the bed is. an ordeal. the seller is late, the taxi i booked is early and now running the meter while I wait for her, it's cold out, but I push through and my neighbour helps me get the bedframe into the apartment when I get home.

my IBS, of course, flares up badly. I'm also not sleeping much.

still got more phone appointments but now I don't feel safe doing them in the apartment when she might be coming back at any time so I call my health clinic down the road and find out they do have a room people can use to make phone call appointments

so that's what I do. the doctor from that appointment nags me to follow up on another appointment, so I try to, but we get times mixed up

I am at this point in negative spoons. like part of this is my fault but I thought I would have just enough spoons and then time to recover, but with the roommate stuff I am now deeply in spoon debt

but still gotta try to schedule this second appointment!! while not knowing if I'll have a private place to have it!!

I manage to do that today after packing a bag so I can leave the apartment quickly and do the phone call elsewhere if she shows up

I still haven't put the bedframe together. I am so exhausted I can barely scroll tumblr but then I can't really sleep well either.

I read a whole John LeCarré novel in the past couple nights of not sleeping (A Most Wanted Man, deeply depressing look at post 9/11 spy stuff in Germany, not his best)

I have also been watching a lot of Seinfeld because it requires zero brain

I still haven't watched the new Andor and I'm multiple episodes behind in weekly anime including LycoReco :(

I don't know if she's coming back today but half her stuff is still here. so tomorrow, even though I have zero energy to do so, I am going to have to plan to leave the house if she comes back and starts being a bitch again because I can't waste any more energy on her. there's a zine fair happening in a library I can go to.

but the sooner I am free of her the better!!! so she better fucking come get her stuff!!! I don't care if it looks like I suddenly got money so I decided to get rid of her, because yes, I was only putting up with her shit because I need to make rent!!!!

oh the the fleas seem to be gone, so at least there's that. I think the cat picked them up from being out on the balcony. lesson learned.

i think the lesson on the roommate thing is, don't do favours for people if it's making you miserable. nobody wants that.

and especially don't persist in doing something you hate even though you were given an out because you want to feel like a Good Person. you will definitely get resentful and bitter and it never works out

I think a large chunk of our problems was neurodiverse/neurotypical communication issues too... like I'm not officially autistic but I can't stand it when she asks me something and I say no and she just keeps trying to nag me into doing it. or she says "Sorry, I'm in a hurry," instead of "Can you please get out of the kitchen for a minute". I'll do that kind of polite shit if I'm being paid or it's like my aunt or something, but I'm not doing it all day every day.

anyway next roommate absolutely cannot be a hipster bougie type who's just slumming it for a while until they can get a nicer place / new rich boyfriend.

[bixels]

While I do think anon was rude, I do think it's pretty shitty to set up all this stuff you were going to add the au and then just drop it. It's disappointing. Definitely unfollowing.

Bye.

[carlyraejepsans]

Hey, if you don’t mind the question. What’s your opinion on Undertale Yellow?

8/10 game. pretty good at being a game, not so much at being an undertale story. the gameplay itself was fun, the area/puzzle designs too, the soundtrack was untouchable it literally gave me the same rush i felt hearing sburb initiation for the first time. minor NPCs designs were fun but the primary cast was too monotonous, tbh. (all the main characters have tall gangly very detailed designs save for like, axis). its attempts at landing Undertale's humor were quite often successful, but it held back on exaggeration and caricaturing its original characters which took away that oomph from the canon game. the character writing was... lacking. which is a pity.

i love fucked up women so i was really disappointed that every single one of ceroba's actions/ideas/influences on the story were nothing but an extension of her dead husband. when you take chujin away she's just... A Good Wife and Mother. or starlo's past love interest ig. i mean both dalv and martlet's backstory were tied to her family and we never see them interact at all. but they do have an established dynamic.... with the dead husband. again. UGH. she's just really wasted as a character (she and chujin should've BOTH been scientists and she should've continued the project AGAINST his wishes after he died. she's the main cast character, she should be the driving force in the narrative, not him—even if chujin sets the plot in montion by inventing the serum first).

I'm not a huge asgore fan—not that i dislike him, he's just not a character i care about all that much—so congrats to this game for making me say "he would NOT fucking say that". the "fuck the royals" subplot thing was really unnecessary. actually, that was a bit of a recurring thing in the game. suddenly introducing these Huge Social Dilemmas like labor exploitation, anti-monarchic sentiments, misogyny (bro who on earth "needs to take a wife" this is Undertale) everyone realizing that clover is a child, over exaggerating the violence at stake... while also attempting to maintain Undertale's careless, bouncy treatment of the situation. that's... not how things work. undertale is able to maintain its light tone BECAUSE it doesn't let you take those topics seriously, they're not meant to be. the fairytale-like king, the battles, the child protagonist, they're all set dressings for the REAL story and REAL power imbalance it wants to highlight: that between player and game characters. everything is in function of that. you take that layer of separation and make everyone aware that theyre violently attacking and killing a literal child... that's not. a good thing dude. if it's not gonna impact the tone of the story, why acknowledge it in the first place? it's just unnecessary

anyway flowey neutral run was really, really fun. his dialogue writing all throughout the game was very solid and i had a blast having him around. however, they shouldn't have tried to anticipate his character development. this game is a prequel, you can't do that without undermining his arc in the canon events. pacifist should've had him doubling down on his frustration from the neutral ending. i do all this work for you keeping you alive and you make the same mistake i did sacrifice yourself for them??? are you BRAINDEAD???? what I'm saying is he basically should've thrown the biggest tantrum of his LIFE. oh and in the NM run he should've been terrified when he lost control of the SAVE file. this is the first time it's ever happened to him and now he's gonna die for good. he wouldn't have gloated like he did.

if you want to hear more criticism along the lines of what i said then this post by the fantastic @andreabandrea covers a lot of what i also felt during the game. i know this might sound like a lot of negativity, but the fact remains that UTY was an absolutely phenomenal work of fan creativity the likes of which we have never seen before in the fandom. considering the quality and polish, i thought it only fair to approach it as the piece of art it is and give it my genuine thoughts on the matter.

overall, still a really fun way to spend the afternoon with a pal. so. thumbs up

[cerise-on-top]

Hi, love your writing. it's so good 💚💚

Could I request some HC for LV + Graves who have an S/O who has three cats that love to sleep on top of them?

😸💚

Thank youuuu! That's very kind of you! This ask actually inspired me to text my friend again and ask her for some cat pics since those critters are just so goshdarn adorable!! I wish I had a cat! I once had a tortoise, though, and she was just the most lovely and adorable little thing out there! I loved her so dearly! Anyway, thank you for the request!

Alejandro, Rodolfo and Graves with an S/O with Three Cats

Alejandro: He gives off quite some canine energy, so there’s a chance your cats won’t like him too much. That, of course, you can try to combat by having him feed them. Either way, if they like Alejandro, then you can expect him to be all over your cats, always talking to them, petting them, picking them up, kissing them and what else it is you do with a cat. He loves your little kitties and would kill someone for them. Although he’s more of a dog person himself, he doesn’t prefer dogs by much, so he can really go either way. When he sees just how cuddly your cats are and when they take a nap on his chest while he’s watching TV with you or something, he will not hesitate to pet the cat, scratch the little fella behind its ears and try his best to make them purr. He loves the sound and the vibration, it brings good vibes and makes him just as content as the cat. The rule that one must not move when a cat is sleeping on top of them holds true for him. If he needs to use the bathroom while one of your cats is sleeping on him then he’ll just have to endure until it wakes up. But if he’s content as well, then he might just cuddle the cat, or your cats even, and take a nap himself. While he’s not usually one for napping, he will when he genuinely can’t move because of your lovely little felines. If your cats let him, he will give them big hugs as well. Is so smitten, he’ll buy them some toys and play with them, if he has the time. And if your cats are too lazy to actually play, then he’ll pick them up and lovingly scold them for being so unmotivated. Meows back at cats too.

Rodolfo: He gets along well with just about any animal. While he’s not scared of them per se, he does have a healthy amount of respect for them and won’t just walk up to your cats to give them pats and kisses and hugs. He will comply if your cats walk up to him because they’re curious, but he really doesn’t want to annoy them or worse, end up with him getting scratched. While he may not meow back at your cats either, he will talk to them as though they’re regular human beings. It’s somewhat funny, he takes them seriously and will, in a deadpan tone, tell them that there will be no more snacky treats for the evening. No matter how annoying your cats might get, he won’t budge. His decision is final, so there are no more snacky treats. He quite likes the thing where if you scratch a cat’s butt, it will move it upwards. Loves doing that to your cats, it’s funny and endearing to him. When your cats are sleeping on top of him, then he won’t particularly budge either. He’ll pat them, but he will also move them if he really needs to use the bathroom. No privileges for your cats this time. However, considering he is, more often than not, pretty tired, he will pretty much always take a nap with your cats if he can. The pressure on his chest is comforting to him, plus he gets to feel something nicely warm and furry on top of him as well. However, he sometimes moves in his sleep, which might wake up your cats, which might wake up him. It’s a never ending circle, but if he can, he’ll just sleep with your cats in his arms. Take a picture of him like that and he’ll try to take embarrassing pictures of you as well with your cats.

Graves: He is definitely more of a dog person, since those are strong and reliable. A cat will meow at you in the dead of the night because it knocked over its water bowl and can’t turn on the faucet on its own. Honestly? He always has something to complain about. Your cat pooped again. It knocked over the food bowl. It farted in his face. Things like that. He means them, but the way he says those things is sort of just funny. Imagine a 40 year old man having beef with a cat. He has very little shame when it comes to scolding your cats. At first, he will use his human words to get them to listen. But as soon as he realizes they believe it’s snuggle time, he will meow at them, making the situation even worse. However, every time you hand him one of your cats, he will take it from your arms and cuddle it a bit. Every time one of the critters walks up to him, demanding attention, he will pick it up and carry it around a bit. Sometimes in his arms, sometimes he just slings the cat over his shoulder and keeps it there. It’s sort of funny, he might pretend to really hate them, but he would never yell at them, only be stern and tell them to not be so gluttonous. When your cats are sleeping on top of him, he does not move an inch. He would never admit it, but they are your shared furry babies and he, like any American, would shoot anyone who ever tried to hurt you or them. Takes naps too when he can, or when nothing of interest is on TV, but he prefers getting to hold something instead of having your cats lie on top of you. You can take pictures of him to show him that he really doesn’t hate your cats as much as he pretends to, but he will always claim you photoshopped it, despite knowing fully well that happened.

[grem-archive]

y'all can pry baseball player alfred from my cold dead hands

wanted to do more general action poses. but more ass was decided by democratic vote as i started sketching in-stream. so you guys get more of it. also got bored enough to draw the full uniform.

[gideonisms]

I want to write I want to make girls be weird about each other in MY word docs I want to have creative projects and goals againn :/

[plantboiart]

Projection time once again. Kian as a little kid with autism who doesn’t realize people don’t like him. Who gets so excited over everything and shares his interests with everyone and doesn’t get why people always seem to end up finding him annoying. Kian who tries so desperately to make friends but always messes it up somehow. Kian who latches onto every new person he meets because they haven’t gotten the chance to get sick of him yet. Kian who is so desperate for love and attention but never receives it before he moves go Galloway and meets the other guys. Kian who spends ages before finally telling them about his love for music because he doesn’t know how to stop himself from going overboard and he doesn’t want to lose them too. Kian who can never act normal enough to truly feel wanted and loved.

[quinn-pop]

mtdd week day 3 - caring

yeah this is a totally random timeskip thing. just pretend dedede looks older okay thank you

just another night (and it’s ours)

part 2

[koushuwu]

Casual Miyuki Kazuya.

[wildstar25]

Many thoughts specifically about miqo'te having their own unique wintertime celebration akin to a festival of lights and/or warmth that would date back to the fifth umbral era (age of endless frost). It could be something that recounts their peoples' great crossing over the ice bridge during a time where days were short and nights were frigid.

The two tribes could celebrate it slightly differently, I think:

Seekers would focus on bringing light into their lives by gathering as a tribe around a big bonfire as the sun goes down. The eldest of the tribe recounts the blessing of fire granted to them by their goddess Azeyma. They mention the torches their ancestors carried along their journey never went out, no matter how strong or cold the winds became over the frozen ocean straight. The light of the flames kept their tribe together in the dark; it let them see the path ahead when the sun went down and was strong enough to be seen by even the slowest trailing members of the migrating tribes. Food is cooked by the flames as children run and play. Of Age Tias endlessly sing over each other, all trying to demonstrate how well they know their clan's traditional songs. The Nuhn keeps the fire going through the night, making sure it doesn't burn out until the light of tomorrow's dawn arrives.

Keepers would focus how the warmth of their family clans kept them alive where most other life perished in the cold. They would hold a large feast on the night of a full moon; stewed game, seasoned preserves, fresh loafs of sesame flour bread, roasted mushrooms and root vegetables would fill their bellies as the night festivities went on. Tokens of love and appreciation would be shared among clan members. As a rare occurrence in keeper life, wandering males would be invited in to partake in the revelry. Prayers would be sung in honour of Menphina, giving thanks bringing love to their lives and for guiding their ancestors together across the horizon. Arms would link together to create circles of dancing miqo'te. Hyms and cheers would carry through the forest for as long as the moon remained high in the sky. Love struck pairings might slink off to deepen their new connections while the remaining family members sleep in groups, sharing each others warmth for the night like those who crossed over into Eorzea so long ago.

Something like that!! Idk this is just off of the top of my head thoughts. Mostly just think that it would make more sense that the Miqo'te tribes and clans have their own cultural practises as they were/are a nomadic people that (in lore) are small in number and tend to keep to themselves. Stories of their people would need to be passed down in one way or another, why not make it a holiday??

[adhdandcomics]

adding to my tags because i’ve been thinkin a lot about the post i just reblogged and have more thoughts:

i’ll be real, the more i saw ‘hey adhd influencers are so annoying’ the more i worried that i was unconsciously contributing to the spreading reputation of adhd folks as annoying and over-pathologizing every symptom they experience

and then i realized. i am not a goddam influencer or life coach or representative. obviously i have some obligation as someone who cares about myself and the people that like my comics to not spread harmful ideology or blatant misinformation but i never intended myself to be a “’increase your productivity!!’ blog OR a ‘if you have XYZ you have adhd!’ blog. and i do this for fun, and originally started this blog bc i had a lot of internalized shame and self loathing about my adhd and thought if i could make it funny i might have less of that. let’s get real! and it worked!

i’ve obviously done this kind of thing— (hey these symptoms might be adhd!) a lot before in my life & on this blog, but there’s more to it than trying to be an “influencer” or whatever. a term that didn’t even exist when i started this blog!

i felt very isolated trying to find out if i had any mental problems & what have you originally because of large advice (etc) blogs with staunchly anti self Dx views at the time

so i overcorrected when i DID get dxed and tried to validate everyone who was like me. and of course. not the best course of action always for the ol mental health. tried to be the source of positivity and jokes that i didn’t see because the online adhd presence was near non-existent.

and anyway. i make a lot of fun of myself & the way m brain works in my comics obviously but it is not my obligation to... how do you say.... not be annoying online.

because if folks interpret MY little jokes as a strict guide to diagnosis. that’s on them, really, not me. i also believe “making adhd your entire personality” is a non-issue. so what if people find out they have it and get over excited with identifying as adhd. saying this as someone who DID do it. criticism of this gives the same vibes as people being annoyed that young queers make “being queer” their whole personality. im very obviously more than a guy with adhd, and id reckon other adhd comic artists are too. (im friends with a lot of them!) it’s fine to post about it online.

anyway. i just don’t take myself too seriously and i’m a comic artist for myself first! and you know what, i’ve been considered annoying my entire life. what do i care if a few more folks think i’m annoying. neurotypical or not

[flowercrowngods]

i don't know how to be merely acquaintances when we used to be friends. or i think we used to be. i don't know how to yearn for a simple hello when you've been heaping your affection on me months ago, and i don't know how to talk to you when you won't say anything. when suddenly it's all about me. you know i have nothing to say, you know my brain is void of everything but horribleness and i cannot tell you about my day because i don't even know about my day. i cannot tell you about my day when i know you won't listen, when i know you'll apply your philosophy to my world and don't believe me when i say that everything is terrible. i don't know how to be the person you seem to think i am, or the person you want in your life. i don't know if you want anyone else in your life now that you're in love and sappy, found another recipient for your affections, leaving me empty and wounded and yearning.

you said you missed me. said it many times, while i was gone. now i'm back, have been back, and i wonder how you missed me, why you missed me, when you won't talk to me. i think you mistook missing for worrying. i think you mistook caring for a feeling of obligation. i think you like missing me more than talking to me.

and i think i can't breathe with how much that hurts

[antiqua-lugar]

For Not-Italians, an Italian rapper said "Stop the genocide" at the end of his final performance at the Sanremo Song Contest and got called out by the Israel embassy for "spreading hate".

You can read the article for yourself, but what the article doesn't say is that our goverment who is now falling over themselves to support Israel and claiming to fight against all anti semitism is lead by the Brothers of Italy (Fratelli d'Italia) which is a fascist party.

[lyxchen]

I felt like putting together my favorite thing I've drawn from every month (mostly to show myself that I did something every month) so here you all go <3 I also think this is a good way to finish the year☆

January

February

March

April

May

June

July

August

September

October

November

December

[russilton]

Do you ever just like, get the urge to be around your friends but you don’t have the energy to contribute to a conversation or act presentable

I just want to lie in the middle of a room with all my friends around me. Doesn’t matter what they’re doing, they’re just there, being them. So rather than worrying as replies go unanswered becuase I’m exhausted and so overstimulated, I just… exist, involved. I think that’s the dream y’know.