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thefallennightmare · 10 months

Text

Just Pretend-nine

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: PLEASE, we are begging you guys. Take your time with this one, so many different emotions throughout. Its a big fucking deal and read it slow, immerse yourself in this world while listening to the playlist. Enjoy my lovelies. 😉

Collaborating With: @thescarlettvvitch(better give her all the love as well)

Tags: @thescarlettvvitch @ozwriterchick @waake-meee-up @notingridslurkaccount @niicoleleigh @sammyjoeee @xxrainstorm @dominuslunae @notmaddihealy @malice-ov-mercy @crimson-calligraphyx @iknownothingpeople @writethrough @thebadchic @blackveilomens Claudia on Tumblr @tobe-written @blacksoul-27 @loeytuan98 @loverofagoodbeard @comfortcharactercraze @lma1986 @plutonikchaos1 @spicywhenspeaking @lyschko666 @somewhere-diamond

NOAH

"I'm so fucking glad we're staying in a hotel the next few days," Folio groaned as we walked down the long hallway of the hotel.

I nodded in agreement. "I can't believe the tour is almost over; our last show is tomorrow night."

With our last show tomorrow night, we were spending the next few nights in a hotel and we all planned to take flights back home so we could get there faster. Hollow Souls were also staying in this hotel but they were a floor beneath us but it seemed the farther I went from Y/N, those imaginary pull strings inside of my heart tightened. If it hurt this bad when she was a floor underneath, how bad would it hurt when she was a state away?

As far as I knew, she still had plans to go back to Vegas because that's where her home was, granted it was with Trey. There wasn't a part of me that was worried she would go back to him; I knew she wouldn't. Ever since they fired him, Hollow Souls has been thriving. They posted on their social media pages that Trey was kicked out of the band due to personal reasons and while most of their fans complained about them kicking out their main vocalist, there was a select few that were excited to see what the future of Hollow Souls looked like.

Y/N was upset at first that so many of their fans were boycotting them now because they decided to kick Trey out.

"Seems like they only care about Trey's vocals when I'm the one that actually wrote our songs."

It took a while of Malcolm and Chase talking to her to realize that their future together as a band was looking bright. They could reinvent themselves.

I filled in for the last two shows but after playing my set for thirty minutes before their hour-and-a-half set, my voice was getting raw and sore so Matt thought it be best if I didn't fill in for the last show. I was going to argue, not wanting to let them down, but Chase reassured me they'd figure out what to do for the last show.

Y/N has been glowing since Trey left, slowly becoming a better woman in front of all of us; to me, she'd always been perfect. But we could all see her confidence growing. With her face in the dirt far too many times with Trey, she finally said enough; it doesn't hurt anymore. As all of his lies crumbled down, Y/N found a new life.

To say all of us were proud of her was a fucking understatement.

"Hey," Jolly bumped shoulders with mine, pulling me from my thoughts as we stopped in front of the door to his room. "Bryan wants us ready to go in twenty minutes."

Oh, right.

We were currently in Oregon and Bryan planned some time today on our off day to visit one of the national parks here to take some promo photos of us.

"Yeah, I'll be ready to go. I need to change quickly and I'll meet you guys down in the lobby," I said as I walked down a few more doors until I stopped in front of my room; the one I was sharing with Nick.

He patted my shoulder as he walked past me into the room. "You should ask if Y/N wants to come with."

I shrugged off his words, trying not to make it seem that I'd been tossing around the idea for the last hour when Bryan first told us about his plan.

"She might have plans with Chase and Malcolm," I said while tossing my suitcase onto the bed, quickly rifling through the clothes to find something to change into.

"She doesn't. Last I heard, Chase and Malcolm are going out tonight so Y/N will be alone," Nick raised a suggestive brow.

With a long sigh, I turned to face him. "You already planned this, didn't you?"

"It was Chase's idea," he answered.

Rolling my eyes, I pulled out my phone to send a text to Y/N.

Get dressed, I'll be by your room in fifteen minutes.

She responded quickly before I had the chance to set my phone down.

Care to tell me where we're going?

All you need to know is to dress warm, angel.

You're full of surprises. See you soon, mochi. Room 245.

"Mochi?" I chuckled to myself while pocking my phone.

With a smile playing at my lips and my heart pounding loudly in my heart at the nickname, I tossed on a fresh hoodie and my tan jacket, opting to leave my hair down. Nick finished getting dressed when I did and once we stepped out in the hallway, Jolly and Folio were already waiting for us right outside our door.

"Fuck," I cursed while clutching my chest. "You scared the shit out of me, Folio."

"Too busy thinking about Y/N, huh?" He gave a playful smile.

Shoving him on the shoulder, I mentioned we needed to stop by her room before heading down to the lobby.

Jolly adjusted the guitar bag on his back. "She's coming with?"

I hesitantly nodded. "Is that alright? Nick said she was alone, and I felt bad if we left her while we did something."

They all smirked at my rambling as we took the stairs down one floor, our footsteps echoing in the small confined space.

"Of course it is, we don't mind when she tags along," Jolly said.

Coming to a stop in front of door 245, I gently rapped my knuckles against it and waited for her petite voice to carry through the wood. It was silent for a few moments, nerves ate away at my stomach as I wondered why she wasn't answering yet.

I knocked once again, this time with a bit more force, and breathed a little when a loud curse sounded from the other side.

"Hang on, someone's at the door."

I looked over to Nick with a raised brow, and he merely shrugged. "Chase and Malcolm are gone so I don't know who she's talking to."

The door opened with a quick brush of air, and my heart skipped a beat at the sight in front of me. Y/N was dressed in a pair of black tights, and a deep orange sweater that rested to the middle of her thighs, and her hair was pulled back in a high ponytail. I had to resist the urge to wrap my fingers through it to pull her back to me as she turned back into the room.

"Give me two minutes, I have to get my shoes," She said while clutching her phone to her ear. "No, Dad. Not you. I've got plenty of time to talk."

While the rest of the guys hung out in the hallway, I leaned against the wall right next to her bed and watched her as she slipped on her typical Doc Martin, nodding every so often to something her dad was saying on the other end of the phone.

"Dad, you seem to forget that you're seventeen hours ahead of me right now," she laughed causing my heart to flutter. "It's only noon here. Wait, why are you calling me so early? Isn't it your day off?"

She paced around the room looking for something and realizing what it was; I grabbed her bag and slung it over my shoulder. "I got it."

Y/N smiled her thanks before the conversation with her dad took her attention again. "No, I haven't talked to Mom in a while…. well, the last time she tried to guilt trip me into staying with her when the tour was over…I'm not staying at Trey's place anymore. We broke up.…..yea, long time coming, tell me about it….I'm sure I'll figure it out but I'm not staying in Vegas anymore…..hell yes I'm keeping Salem; asshole doesn't do shit for my cat."

I couldn't ignore the way my stomach flipped hearing that she didn't plan on staying in the same state as Trey.

"I can't move in with Malcolm or Chase because they're actually finding their own place together…Dad, they're dating; have been for the last six months…Yeah, that will explain exactly why Chase and I never got together."

I chuckled as I thought of her dad trying to set up her and Chase.

"You saw videos from the show last night?" There was a clear shock in her voice as she continued to talk with her dad as she rushed around the room getting ready.

"I'm surprised because you don't even know how to work face time," she giggled. "Oh, he's a friend of ours. We've been touring with his band for the last few weeks. Yeah, he filled in the last couple of shows….you think so? That's what everyone is saying online."

Her gaze flicked up to mine as her lips parted slightly, whatever her dad said made her give a long pause.

"Just a friend, dad." Then she turned swiftly on her heels away from me to whisper something low into the phone.

"I'm sorry," she mouthed to me with a pulled expression as she looked over her shoulder..

I waved her off. "Take your time."

"Dad, you know I miss you but I can't move to Japan; not now. But yes, I promise to visit you as soon as I can."

Eventually, after another minute, she said goodbye before hanging up with an audible groan. "Don't get me wrong, I love my dad but sometimes he forgets we talk almost every other day. He wants a play-by-play of my life every time."

"He wants you to visit?" I questioned.

She nodded while slipping into a jacket. "Yeah but its hard to find time. You need more than a weekend to visit Japan; there's so much to do."

"Yeah," I pushed her hand away when she went to reach for her bag. "I've got it."

"Noah, you don't have to carry my bag," she chuckled.

I shrugged. "I don't mind. Ready?"

"Yep," she smiled that heart-stopping smile.

When she walked past me towards the open door, my fingers grazed the inside of her wrist to stop her.

"Mochi?" I asked.

"Yes," she responded immediately. "Because you're the sweetest and your tummy is soft."

She poked her finger into my stomach before letting out a loud shriek of laughter as I wrapped an arm around her shoulders to bring her into my embrace, the both of us walking to the doorway where the guys were waiting.

"Malcolm and Chase are going to meet us once they're finished with their date," Y/N said.

"I'll text them the address," Nick said while pulling out his phone.

"Where are we headed?"

"The mountains," Folio answered with a smile.

"Ooh," she slipped out of my embrace, much to my dismay, to rummage around her suitcase for a book before she came back to me, lifting my arm and throwing it over her shoulder once again. "Now I'm ready."

Resisting the urge to press a kiss to her forehead, I set my sunglasses over my eyes and pulled her along with me as she let the door close behind us and ignored the smug look Nick threw my way as we walked past him; Y/N wrapping an arm around my back.

NOAH

"Can you believe how many people are calling for us to collaborate? It's all over Twitter," Nick said while browsing on his phone.

"Shit, really?" Y/N peered over from the back seat so she could gaze down at Nick's phone, who sat in front of her.

I was driving the van to the location that Bryan chose for our photo shoot but Folio called shotgun before she could which earned a cute little pout on her lips; lips that I wanted so bad to taste once again. So she sat in the far back with Jolly while Nick and Bryan sat in the middle. It was weird not having Chase or Malcolm with us since we did everything together on our off days.

"What are they saying?" I wondered while keeping my eyes on the road.

"Fans want you to feature on Hollow Souls next album," Y/N grinned as our eyes locked in the rearview mirror for a few seconds.

I hummed while pulling the van to a stop at the park's entrance. "I'm around whenever you need me, angel."

Once we all piled out, I met Jolly and Bryan at the back of the van to help them unload the equipment while Y/N chatted quietly with both of the Nicks, and out of the corner of my eye; I marveled at how goddess-like she looked with the afternoon sun casting her with her own aura glow. Jolly caught me staring because he smacked my chest before handing me the guitar he brought.

"You could ask her out, ya know," Bryan smirked.

I snapped my gaze over to him. "I can't."

"Why not? It's clear she feels the same since she's here right now," he said.

A long sigh fell from my lips as I ran a hand over my face. "It's not that easy, guys."

Bryan rolled his eyes and then hung his camera from his neck. "I mean you've already kissed, how much easier could things be between you two?"

"You told him?" I seethed at Jolly, who held up his hands.

"I didn't say anything. You two give it away with all the romantic googly-eye shit," he chuckled while he and Bryan began walking up the long trail toward the top of the mountain where we planned on taking the pictures.

"Hey," Y/N smiled as she bounded up next to me. "Little photo shoot?"

Immediately the scowl that followed Byran and Jolly turned into a warm smile, matching Y/N's, and I nodded. We began walking step in step, hands brushing against each other every so often, and I nearly linked fingers with her more than once. However, when we reached some rocky terrain while walking up a hill, Y/N cursed herself for not wearing smarter shoes.

"Here," I bent low in front of her and patted to my back.

"No, you're not carrying me," she tried to laugh it off, but I knew she was nervous about me carrying her weight on my back.

"Angel."

I peered over my shoulder in time to see her place her hands low on her hips.

"Mochi," she teased back with a small smirk.

My heart skipped a long beat at hearing the nickname again. It sounded so fucking sweet falling from her lips; almost as much as my actual name sounded.

"We can do this the easy way or the hard way," I said, still bent low at my knees.

Y/N pulled at the bottom of her sweater dress. "I don't want to give these bozos a show."

She threw a thumb over her shoulder towards both Nick's who walked a few paces behind her. I rose to my knees and gave her a suggestive smirk while closing the distance between us.

"What color are they?"

"Uh," Y/N stammered but quickly recovered. "A cute olive green. Looks great against my skin tone."

A low noise vibrated in the back of my throat and I stood straighter as Folio walked passed just in time to feel the growing sexual tension.

"Either you hop on his back or I will," he joked as he and Nick walked passed us.

She stared up at me and slowly licked her lips, an action I watched carefully through my sunglasses. "Noah?"

"Yes, angel?"

"You have a cute nose," her voice was quiet, and I thought I misheard her.

I titled my head to the side. "My nose?"

"Yeah. It's just the perfect size for your facial structure," she finished with a boop to my nose.

I scrunched up my face. "Did-did you just boop my nose?"

"See!" She pointed to my face. "You look so fucking cute; it's insane."

"Angel, literally," I breathed a low chuckle.

"Mochi, literally," she mocked while sticking her tongue out.

My fingers itched to grab it but Bryan's loud voice echoed through the trees from far ahead. "Let's go you losers! You're holding us up."

I swear to-.

"What will it be, angel?" I asked.

Y/N dramatically sighed before motioning for me to spin around, which I did with a quick wink.

"If you drop me, I swear to Hades," She grumbled while adjusting her dress.

The warmth radiated from her in giant waves as her legs wrapped around my sides and I hooked my arms underneath her thighs to hoist her up.

"I swear to Hades that I will not drop you," I promised while walking up the steep hill towards the rest of the guys. "Do you actually pray to the Greek Gods?"

She flicked my ear. "No, silly. I just like to joke around with them. They're my favorite mythology."

"Will you teach me about them?

"I'm honored you asked; I'd love to," she ran her fingers through my long hair and I briefly let my eyes flutter shut at the calming feeling.

"Only if you let me braid your hair."

My eyes snapped open. "Uh, we'll see about that."

She flicked my ear again. "You're no fun."

Hooking her tighter against me, I closed the distance between us and the guys in a few long strides. Nick gave the two of us a look as I set Y/N down gently on her feet, she quickly pulling down her dress.

"You didn't see shit," she pointed a firm finger to all of us.

"Nope."

"Nothing."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Bryan held up his camera and snapped a few pictures of Y/N; who in return, flipped him the finger.

I watched with a racing heart as she messed around with the guys, almost as if she'd been part of our little group for years.

"Alright," Y/N pulled the book out of her bag. "I'll let you guys do your thing. If you need me, I'll be reading over there."

She pointed to the edge of the mountain that looked over the small lake we drove past to get here.

"Be careful, angel," I warned.

"I'll be fine," Y/N rolled her eyes but as she turned, she tripped over a rock and stumbled a bit before standing straight.

I raised a teasing brow at her while crossing my arms over my chest. "What was that?"

"Fuck you," she taunted with her middle finger.

Don't tempt me, angel.

The next hour passed in a blur as we took countless pictures, just having a fun, relaxing time. Every so often, my gaze would fall onto Y/N as she leaned up against a large willow tree, book perched in her lap. The wind blew through her ponytail every so often and I marveled at how fucking breathtaking she looked when her face would scrunch in surprise with whatever she was reading.

I knew from the moment I stepped off our bus the first day of the tour when I saw her standing amongst the group; when we first met. It wasn't the typical love at first sight bullshit Folio talks about that happens in the movies. It was more like a familiarity, almost like 'oh, hello. It's you. It's always going to be you.'

"Noah, could you take a little step forward," Bryan directed.

Snapping my gaze away from Y/N reluctantly, I followed Bryan's orders for another long few minutes until he decided we got enough pictures. I motioned towards Y/N, who still had her nose perched in her book, and Bryan knew what I silently was saying because he snapped a few pictures of her.

Malcolm and Chase walked up just as we finished our photoshoot so a quick idea came to my mind.

"Angel," I called.

She looked up. "Hm?"

Not saying anything, I waved her, Malcolm, and Chase over to our position which they did hesitantly.

"If Bryan is cool with it," I pointed to him. "What do you guys say for a Hollow Souls photoshoot? New and reimagined?"

Bryan immediately agreed. "Let me change out some things and we can get started.

Chase and Malcolm also agreed with a nod. "I think it'll be good for us."

"You guys don't have to do this for us," Y/N stated. "You've already done so much for us, Noah by filling in."

I shrugged while stuffing my hands deep into the pockets of my jeans. "I take care of the people I care about."

She pondered my words for a long moment and eventually let out a long breath. "Alright fine."

Once Bryan returned, the rest of stepped back to give them space to work. Nick was the only one who watched me as Jolly, Folio, and I kept our eyes on Hollow Souls. We grabbed a few beers from the cooler Jolly packed and was nursing them slowly.

"You know, this would be a perfect opportunity to maybe slip away just the two of you," Nick whispered.

I peered over to him and rolled my eyes, shoving him in the shoulder. "Whatever."

"I'm just saying," he held up his hands in defense. "A night under the stars in the mountains. Anybody would kill for a date like that."

Nick's words weighed heavily on my brain and when she began walking towards me, I made the haste decision by grabbing the guitar that was leaning against the tree.

"Hi," Y/N smiled as I met her halfway.

My heart warmed at the sight.

"Do you want to go somewhere more secluded, just the two of us?" I suggested with a hopeful smile.

I didn't want to think how I would feel if she rejected me and walked away from me.

"Sure," she answered quickly with a glimmer shining in her eyes.

Ultimately, after walking for a few minutes, we decided on an area far from the rest of the group down the water's edge. We sat down in the sand, our knees brushing against each other, and held the guitar in my lap as I watched her stare out into the vast distance of the water. There was a faraway look in the depths of her eyes as she messed with something on her wrist, fiddling it between her fingers.

A hair tie; the one I gave her the last time we were on the beach together. I wondered where it went but decided that I never wanted it back. It's hers to keep; along with everything else I gave her.

"How are you doing, angel?" I asked, breaking the growing silence.

She didn't look at me, kept her eyes straight ahead.

"I'm-." A hesitant breath. "I'm not sure. I want to believe I'm doing okay with the breakup of not only my relationship but also the band. For the longest time, Hollow Souls was the four of us and we released three records together. The future scares the shit out of me. Can the three of us reinvent a new Hollow Souls or do we need to find someone to replace Trey completely?"

I strummed a few random notes on the guitar; the melody echoing into the sounds of the waves.

"I think a fresh start in all aspects is good for you," I answered slowly, trying to get my thoughts and words right. "I've said it from the start, you're the heart and soul of this band, Y/N. The screams were a bonus. It didn't make or break you guys."

She finally looked towards me and her eyes darted over every inch of my face, wondering if my words were the truth. With her, they always were.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, mochi. Truly."

I scrunched up my face to show that the nickname wasn't my favorite but deep down, my insides were floating in pure bliss having her call me something so disgustingly cute. If any of the guys heard it, though, they would give me shit until the end of my days.

"Ditto, angel, ditto."

I tried to play it cool, sauvé, and chill. My typical demeanor was chipping like ice though, the fear of what would happen if it broke completely had its vise grip on me. No one has ever considered a fuckin a nickname for me, not one without a punchline. Not one without a groan or a cursed tantrum that followed. I wasn’t sure if the pure bliss I was feeling was normal, but who the hell wants normal? Hearing it come from her lips meant everything to me.

"Let's play something," I motioned to the guitar.

"Ooh, what do you have in mind?" She asked while turning her body to face me completely head-on and letting her hair flow as she took it out of the ponytail.

The view of her sitting in front of me with the waves crashing behind her, the setting sun's rays breaking over the horizon stole the breath from my chest.

"Only Love," I answered without an ounce of hesitation.

Y/N's nose scrunched up with confusion and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't the cutest fucking thing ever.

"Noah, that was a demo song from three years ago."

I shrugged and played the first few notes of the song. "Might be silly to some but to me, it means a lot."

It was true. I listened to that song on repeat when it first came out. It was the first song I heard by Hollow Souls and Y/N's voice captivated my heart with its claws. I remember laying on the pullout couch next to Nick in his bedroom as I stayed there yet again. My mind was racing with only one thought.

I have to fucking make it. I needed to buy my own couch that brought a sense of comfort and security I yearned for.

That's when her soft voice came through my headphones and it shocked me to hear a feminine voice after Of Mice and Men. I brushed the hair away from my eyes as I settled deeper into the couch and let Y/N's angelic voice lull me to sleep that night and far too long after.

Cut to three years later and the girl who wrote that song is here in front of me. Some may call it a ‘rockstar crush. Would she be considered that? Who the hell knows? All I know is that I had pent-up memories, and needed to hear that sweet voice sing it, just for me all these years later.

Y/N's real, right there in front of me.

"I'm shocked you remember that song."

"Why wouldn't I? You talked about it being on the cloud during that one livestream," I answered.

Her eyes doubled. "You watched the livestream?"

"Twice."

A red hue brushed across the soft skin of her face as she tilted her head down towards the sand, long hair covering her face.

"No," I brushed away the hair behind her ear. "Don't hide your beautiful face, angel. I want to see all of you if you'd let me."

"Sorry," she muttered under her breath. "I don't even realize I do it."

"Don't apologize. Never apologize to me. Just understand that this is how I see you. Now, enough sadness. Sing for me, angel."

She looked up at me through lashes with a small smile. "Do you know how to play it?"

I snorted, a little hurt that she would doubt me, but proved her wrong as I played the opening part of the song.

"I told you I watched the stream twice."

"Okay," she nodded. "Where did you want me to start?"

"Sing the whole song for me. Please?" I begged.

"You want me to sing the whole song?"

"I do," I rushed out.

Y/N gave a curt nod. “Okay, I’ll play the whole thing- but only because you asked me too, no one else gets the privilege.”

I playfully narrowed my eyes at her. “They better not.”

She took a deep breath while shutting her eyes as I played the tune on the guitar.

"I’m hoping you weren’t heaven sent cause only hell knows where you’ve been. Your built composure’s wearing thin and all your walls are caving in. Before you shut this down, I just wanna lift you up. I’ll take all this love I found and I hope that it’s enough."

We both could hear the ache in our hearts as it bled out, the lyrics mean so fucking much right now.

"Now don’t you shut this down. Ooh no don’t you give this up. I took all this love I found and I hope that it’s enough. Is it enough? If we don’t bend, then this might break. Please don’t give into this pain. Just keep on counting down the days and dream of me to keep you safe."

Y/n opened her eyes to meet mine, a blaze of passion that cut deep into my bones.

"Before you came around I was lost and out of place. You’re the only love I found and I’m hoping that you’ll stay. Please stay."

As we played on together in perfect harmony, there was one thing bright in clear in my mind: I'd stay for as long as she let me.

"Fuck," she breathed. "I forgot how much I loved singing this song."

I nodded in agreement while setting the guitar down next to me. "It's one of my favorites. It's actually what got me into Hollow Souls. I'd been hooked on your voice since that first night on Nick's couch all those years ago when I first heard it."

Y/N beamed when an idea struck her with such force, she stumbled to her feet. "I have to talk with Chase and Malcolm about something."

She took off a few steps in front of me, clearly excited about this idea she had. As we reached the rest of the guys, Y/N made a beeline toward Chase to tell him about her idea while I walked up to Nick and Folio, the former giving me a look.

"So my date idea was good, huh?" He playfully jabbed my side.

I pushed him away with a groan of embarrassment. "Fuck off, Nicholas."

"Oh, he pulled out the full name," Folio teased.

Jolly and Bryan joined us as we finished packing up the van and when I glanced over to Y/N, I noticed Malcolm pinching her cheeks playfully and she smacked his hands away, her cheeks flushed with her own embarrassment and large smile.

NOAH

"Oh wow, look at all of these beautiful people tonight!" Y/N's voice carried through the sold-out arena.

It was the last show of tour and Hollow Souls just took the stage for their set. We could feel the nerves radiate off of all three of them all the way where we stood on the stage to watch them. This was new what they planned on doing tonight but the three of them spent the rest of last night after we parted ways at the hotel and all morning and afternoon today practicing nonstop a new setlist. They wanted to show everyone tonight the first step towards the new Hollow Souls.

"Where's Noah?!" a voice yelled from the crowd.

Jolly chuckled from beside me. "Think they'll be upset you don't show up tonight?"

I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. "I hope not. This is something that they need to prove they can do. The fans need to have faith in Hollow Souls."

"Well, about that," Malcolm spoke into his microphone while adjusting his bass strap.

"Now before you all start booing us off the stage," Chase spoke next from his spot above on his makeshift drum stage. "Noah has been fucking killing it not only with Bad Omens this tour but also helping us out a lot. But tonight, we wanted to do something a little different. We still have our guitar tech filling in for us!"

The crowd cheered for their guitar tech, which made him give an awkward wave.

"I know this may take getting used to, but we appreciate your support in doing what’s right for us and our band," Y/N said. "It means so fucking much to all of us you still showed up tonight even knowing Trey is no longer with us. For that, we're going to give you a kick ass show you deserved. Don't give up on Hollow Souls. We cut out the disease and are ready to fucking blossom."

Y/N peered over to me and with a small wave and wink, she sang the first few lyrics of Only Love.

NOAH

Darkness cascaded over my sleeping form, a brush of moonlight breaking through the curtains pulled tight in our hotel room, and I buried myself deeper into the cocoon of blankets. Sleep was within my grasp and after the last few weeks, the thought of finally being able to sleep in my own bed back at home made it that much easier to grasp it.

Until my phone buzzed from its place on the nightstand and my hand smacked around until it grabbed it. Through hazy vision, I blinked a few times for the words to clear.

Hey, are you awake?-Angel.

I sat up in bed and rubbed away the rest of the sleep from my eyes. It only meant one thing when someone texted you the typical you up text.

Yeah, couldn't sleep.

Bullshit, you were seconds away from waking up Nick with your snoring.

I stared at the bubbles that appeared on my screen and then disappeared, only to reappear right before her next text came through.

Would it be alright if I came by to hang out? Or is it too late?

The clock at the top of my screen showed it was just before midnight.

Not at all. I've got snacks, and we can finally finish watching Spirited Away. Room 392

Be there in five minutes. I'll bring some goodies too! :)

I chucked a pillow at Nick, who was fast asleep in his bed, but when he remained sleeping, I threw another. Eventually, he groaned, slowly waking up.

"You need to leave." I scrambled out of bed and pulled away the blankets from Nick. "Y/N's coming by to hang out."

Nick smoothed down his bedhead, a sly smirk on his lips. "You're kicking me out right now?"

"Fuck yes I am. Go bunk with Bryan or Matt," I said while changing out of my old gray sweats for a pair of black joggers, opting to put on a shirt.

He yawned before grabbing the things he would need and dragged his feet to the door, sending a text to whoever he bunked with.

"Be safe!" Nick called out before the door shut behind him.

With seconds to spare, I quickly tidied up the room then set up a variety of snacks and pulled up the movie on my laptop, setting it on the bed just in time for a soft knock to sound on the door. I let out a few deep calming breaths and did a quick once over of myself in the mirror.

"Hi," I smiled once I opened the door.

Y/N's eyes grazed over every inch of me as she shifted on her feet in the doorway, clutching a bag close to her chest. She was dressed in a pair of sleep shorts and an oversized shirt.

"Do you always sleep shirtless?" she asked with a raised brow.

I stepped to the side, allowing her to step inside the room. "Every hotel room I sleep in can't get any colder than seventy degrees. I need it to be at least sixty-eight. I run hot when I sleep and the guys know not to mess with the thermostat back home."

"Wow, good to know. I'll keep my hands to myself when I come over," she wiggled her fingers after setting her bag down on the couch.

Please don't.

I peeked a brow. "When you come over?"

"Oh, if you thought you saw the last of me because the tour is over, you're wrong," she fell onto the couch with a huff of breath. "I'm moving to Los Angeles."

My heart thumped loudly in my chest but I did my best to hide my excitement when I sat next to her.

"You are?" I questioned.

She nodded with that room-brightening smile. "I had a long talk with Chase and Malcolm tonight and we thought it is best. With us trying to reinvent Hollow Souls it'd be good if we were together for the writing process. Malcolm already found a place big enough for us and while he's going there to get things ready, Chase is flying back with me to Vegas to help me pack my things."

I shifted in my seat, resting my arm against the back of the couch, behind Y/N. "Do you think Trey will be there?"

"Probably but that's why Chase is coming with me; in case things go south."

"I could come too if you'd like," I stumbled over my words only slightly.

Y/N rested a hand on my knee and squeezed it. "You need to stop worrying so much about me, Noah. I can't ask you to change your plans for something I should do on my own."

"You're worth it, angel," I vowed while running a finger through the soft waves of her hair.

We stayed in that position for a minute longer, simply staring into each other's eyes, and when I ran my tongue over my bottom lip, Y/N let out a soft whine. The thick tension that always seemed to be around us intensified now, and it was almost hard to breathe, let alone keep my thoughts off the way her hand grazed a few inches higher on my thigh.

I cleared my throat while nodding to the bag next to her. "What did you bring?"

"Oh," she snapped out of her trance and set it on her lap. "Last tour, I started this tradition on the final night I celebrate by doing self-care."

She pulled out an array of masks and different colors of nail polish and then set them on the small coffee table in front of us.

"Sweet, hand me one," I nodded towards the masks.

"You do masks?" Y/N giggled.

"What, you think I get this perfect skin with just water?" I jeered with a smile.

For the next while, we sat with our face masks on and watched the movie on the small screen of my laptop. It took almost no convincing from her to paint my nails black; her choosing a burgundy color for her nails. But now, what she was trying to convince of me gave me a slight pause.

"I don't know, angel. I don't let just anyone touch my hair," I said while putting away my laptop, us finishing the movie.

Y/N moved to the chair that sat in the room's corner and had her legs spread wide. "It's a good thing I'm not anyone. Now, get your ass over here and let me braid your hair."

For added effect, she pouted her bottom lip out and gave me those big doe eyes.

"Fine," I sighed before sitting on the floor between her legs, my back to her.

I shivered under her touch as she raked her fingers through my hair to break apart the small knots that gathered while I slept earlier.

"So, which Greek God is your favorite?" I asked.

She hummed. "Without a doubt, Medusa. Her story is tragic and sometimes often told wrong but that's the thing with mythology; there are so many different versions, you just have to choose which one you believe more."

"Medusa is the one with the snake hair, right?"

"Yeah," she turned my head to the left as she began braiding that side. "Some stories said she was an original gorgon sister but recent tellings from Ovid say she was a beautiful maiden who worked in Athena's temple. Poseidon saw her from afar and just like Zeus always did, Poseidon decided he wanted Medusa. He had sex with her on the temple steps and Athena punished her by turning her into the gorgon with snake hair and cursed any man to turn to stone when they looked at her."

I whistled low. "Shit, Greek gods were assholes."

Y/N snorted. "You don't even know the half of it."

Once she finished the left side, she turned my head to the right so she could start on that side.

"How'd her story end?"

"In tragedy, like every other myth. Perseus was sent to behead her by King Polydectes of Seriphus because Polydectes wanted to marry Perseus's mother. The gods were well aware of this, and Perseus got help. He received a mirrored shield from Athena, sandals with gold wings from Hermes, a sword from Hephaestus, and Hades's helm of invisibility."

"Wait," I turned to look up at her, which made her chastise me because I messed up the braid. "Athena, who turned her into this monster, helped the guy who was sent to kill her?"

"Fucked up, I know."

With stern hands, she turned my head to the right again. "Since Medusa was the only one of the three Gorgons who was mortal, Perseus could slay her; he did so while looking at the reflection from the mirrored shield he received from Athena. During that time, Medusa was pregnant by Poseidon so when Perseus beheaded her, Pegasus, the winged horse, and Chrysaor, a giant wielding a golden sword, sprang from her body."

"Oh Pegasus, from the Disney Hercules," I noted.

"That movie is so wrong but what do you expect for a kids' movie," Y/N chuckled then slapped her thighs. "All finished."

She showed me my reflection through her camera on her phone and I couldn't stop the smirk that pulled at my lips.

"I'll have to admit, angel. I look good with braids," I admitted while snatching her phone from her.

"Hey, what are you doing?!" She asked while reaching for it.

I leaned far back from her and posed for a few selfies. "I thought you'd like an updated selfie of me. I know you have the other two I sent you a few weeks ago."

With a red face, she snatched her phone back and held it close to her chest. "I do not."

Bullshit.

"Right, then let me see your pictures," I teased while kneeling in front of her, hands resting on her thighs, her skin ablaze with heat.

She swallowed thickly. "Fuck you, Sebastian."

READER

I swallowed thickly while clutching my phone to my chest, knowing that he was correct about saving those two selfies he sent me before.

"Are you going to look at the selfie I took?" Noah taunted.

With a breath, I peered down at the phone only to suck in a large breath, body shivering underneath his warm touch on my thighs.

"That's your new contact picture, mochi," I smirked while setting it and leaned deeper in the couch, not realizing that I pressed my core closer to Noah's face.

His eyes burned as his gaze darted from between my legs up to my face and his tongue darted out to wet his lips, almost imagining the taste.

"Angel," his voice was deep, it rumbling in his chest.

All the heat shot straight to my pussy as it clenched with desire, something that always happened when around Noah. Before, I took care of myself with this exact image in my mind but now that it was about to happen made me buzz with excitement.

"Can I?" He asked while breathing over my lap.

I raised my hips towards his face, all morals or thoughts if this was the best idea flew out of the window. We waited long enough for this moment ever since we shared that kiss so long ago. I wasn't a religious person at all but fuck, did I pray to Aphrodite about this moment countless times.

"Please," the word choked out on my lips.

With a low growl, Noah pulled me off of the chair and tossed me onto the bed before he crawled between my spread legs. His long fingers hooked the waistband of shorts and panties pulling them off in almost a quick snap and when blazed eyes stared down at my bare pussy, I tried to close my legs.

"Don't," Noah demanded while gripping my thighs tight to spread my legs again. "Don't hide a fucking thing from me, angel."

Shit.

"I've never actually-," The words died on my lips when I felt embarrassed about what I was about to say.

Noah leaned over me. "Wait, are you going to say what I think you're going to say?"

I turned my head away from him. "He never wanted to go down on me."

Noah cursed while cupping my chin so I could meet his gaze. "Don't think about him, angel. Just lay back and enjoy this."

I did my best to nod in his grasp. "Okay."

He suddenly crashed his lips to mine in a fiery, passionate kiss, as he forced his tongue past my lips to taste every inch of my mouth and I moaned into it, nails scratching against the bare skin of his chest. Noah's teeth dragged over my bottom lip as his hand dragged down my side to slide up underneath my shirt, fingers pinching at my nipples.

"Noah," I breathed while breaking apart from the kiss.

He buried his face into the crook of my neck to breathe me in. "Say it again."

I did, over and over like a mantra, as he left a mark on the skin of my neck while his hand switched to the other breast, mimicking his actions from before. The wetness that pooled between my legs was almost a new feeling, never being this turned one, and for a moment I wondered if it would be alright; no pain.

Noah helped me sit up so he could pull my shirt over my head and soon was laying bare in front of him, hair sprawled around my head.

"Fuck, angel. You're fucking beautiful."

For the longest time, I was told something different from how I looked. So hearing the truth and sincerity from Noah made me almost close my legs in front of him. But with his tight grip on my hips to keep me locked against the bed, I knew he could read my thoughts.

"Don't go there. Stay here with me," he said before his lips pressed over every inch of skin from my lips to my chest, down my stomach, and stopped right about my pussy.

I whined the smallest of sobs when Noah took his time, lips ghosting over me. By now I was almost begging and when I finally felt the wet flick of his tongue against my clit, I breathed out a shaky curse. Noah pressed the fullness of his tongue against my lips, licking me up from the bottom to the top, spreading my legs wider apart. I bit my hand to keep the noises at bay.

"I want to hear you," he left a gentle bit on the inside of my thigh.

"Fuck," I moaned when his tongue speared inside of me for a few strokes.

My hands now grasped at the blanket beneath me as I raised my hips farther into his mouth, his lips wrapping around my clit to bite and suck at the bundle of nerves. I always thought my Gspot was in my clit because it was hard to have an orgasm any other way than rubbing myself. Without even telling Noah this, it was as if he knew exactly what my body needed.

It happened so fast, before I knew it he was devouring me like a dying man. I’ve never felt euphoria until now; this must be how it feels to see the moon, the moon that changes its orbit. He had me spinning.

"I love the way you taste, angel." Noah broke away from my clit for a second before diving back it.

The familiar feeling of an orgasm built in my stomach, the tension pulling so fucking tight it was seconds away from snapping. My spine tingled with anticipation as my body tensed, knees shaking underneath Noah as he rubbed his tongue in faster but shorter circles, moaning with the taste that lingered on his lips.

"N-noah. 'M so close," I let my head fall back deeper into the mattress.

"Let go, I've got you."

With a strangled breath, I let the orgasm crash through me like a tsunami, a bright white light edging at the corners of my eyes while Noah licked me through the last few aftershocks. As my breathing calmed, I lifted my head in time to see him stand to his feet, stepping out of his joggers only to stand in front of me in his black briefs.

I licked my lips when I saw his cock straining against the confines of the material until he palmed himself in a few strokes.

"Do you want me to stop?" He asked.

I shook my head with desperation clear in my voice. "No, please. I need this-I need you, Noah."

He cursed before sliding off his briefs with desperation and urgency, his hard cock springing against his thigh, and I nearly died at that sight alone. All of my imagination did nothing compared to the real thing, and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared for a few different reasons. Sex with Trey was uncomfortable but with Noah's size, I feared it would only hurt. The only saving grace was that he worked me open and the added wetness would make up for the slight pain.

"Are you on anything?" Noah asked while kneeling between my legs.

A lot of different shit.

"No," I said.

He leaned over to a bag that lay at the foot of the bed and rummaged around for a few seconds before retrieving a condom. I watched with anticipation as pre-cum seeped out of the slit when he ripped it open and slid it over his length then perched himself between my legs again, the head of his cock pressing gently against me. He wrapped one of my legs around his hip then slowly, sunk deep inside of me, and I bit my tongue hard to keep my strangled cry quiet. I knew there was going to be some pain; it was inevitable, but I didn't expect it to feel so good either.

"Fuck," Noah rested his forehead against my collarbone. "So tight."

He didn't move at first, relishing in the way I felt gripping his cock, and I couldn't take it anymore; I needed him to move.

"Noah," I begged while grinding against him.

One hand gripping my thigh, the other was placed next to my head to keep himself supported as he finally moved his hips in slow, deep strokes.

"Faster," I panted, almost pleading.

Slow was good but right now I needed fast.

Noah accepted my pleas and began slamming into me with such force, I cried out in name with a mixture of pleasure and pain. My hand slipped between our bodies to rub at my clit, hoping that the sensation would ease the pain a bit, but it could only do so much.

He noticed something was wrong with the way my face contorted in pain. "Angel, do you want to get on top?"

"Fuck yes, please."

Still buried deep inside of me, Noah rolled our bodies so now I was straddling him and almost immediately, the pain subsided; it was still there but not as strong. My hands sprawled over the tattoos that covered his chest as I leaned down to lick my way across the snake and apple on his neck. The noise he made, and his moans were so soft as my hot tongue went up and down his neck, I grazed over his Adam's apple with my teeth and bit down. Noah shook underneath me as he wrapped an arm around my back to hold me closer, burying his thick, aching cock, deeper inside of me.

We felt the rush, the aching, burning blush. We surrendered to the touch. I gave him a show. This is heaven in hiding.

"Angel," he begged as my teeth worked on leaving a mark against the hand on his neck. "I need-."

"What do you need?" I ground my hips against his pelvis and the sensation sent sparks to my clit and I clenched around him.

"Fuck," he cursed. "Don't stop what you're doing. It feels so good."

"Oh," I bit down on a new patch of skin on his throat. "This?"

"Yes," he dragged out the S for a few seconds.

My hands went to run through his hair but I almost forgot in our haste that I braided it a few minutes before this.

"Angel," Noah's voice was raw. "You have no idea how much I've wanted you."

I sat up slowly to stare down at him in awe as his words made me feel unspeakable things.

In one quick action, his hand snaked behind my head to pull my lips back down to him to kiss me feverishly.

"Noah," I tugged on his braids.

"Shit, give me a minute. I can take them out."

I didn't stop moving my hips against him. "Noah. I-."

"Just second, angel."

His hands left their vice grip on my hips to take out his hair but I quickly slapped his hands while sinking deeper on his cock. "Leave them."

The same sensation of a cresting orgasm filled every inch of me, ecstasy shooting through my veins like a drug, and when Noah's thumb pressed fast circles against my clit, I leaned my head up towards the ceiling, lips parting as my hands wrapped around his braids, pulling with such force he choked on my name. I rode Noah faster, needing that last little bit of friction to tip me over the edge and when I finally let the bliss plow through me in droves, I held my breath.

"Angel," Noah cupped my cheek so I could look down at him. "Breathe through it with me."

I did as he said, both of us breathing out my orgasm as our eyes locked intently with each other. I writhed against him, my arousal soaking the condom and parts of his hips. It was such a simple action but the way it set my body on fire intensified the aftershocks to something I'd never experienced. Noah stared down to the place where we met and with a noisy moan, he wrapped an arm tighter around me to pull me flush against his chest as his hips stilled for a second before he emptied himself inside the condom.

NOAH

I pressed light kisses all along Y/N's shoulder blades, in shock and almost slight jealousy as I took in every inch of the large tattoo that covered her back. It was of a large snake that wrapped along every groove of her spine with an array of different Japanese flowers.

Afterward, I let her fall onto the mattress with a happy sigh, immediately grasping the pillow closer to her chest and that's when I noticed the tattoo.

"I can't believe I've never noticed this before," I mused while running a finger over the ink.

"It's taken like two years to complete. It's my second favorite after the one on my leg of the Gods," she rested her chin on her palm. "You know what I just realized? We have similar tattoo themes; copy cat."

Her finger grazed over the snake and apple along my neck.

"Yeah," I chuckled. "All you need is an apple right here."

I smacked right above her ass and she shrieked while falling into the pillow once again, a long but content sigh falling from her lips. I kissed from between her shoulder blades down her back, my nails grazing beyond the wake of my lips.

"Are you okay?" I wondered while gently squeezing her hips.

“Yeah, I think so. I feel content, just basking in it. You?”

I nodded and kissed the side of her head as I lay next to her. "I feel great."

"Do you know what you want in 10 years?" Y/N blurted out.

“That’s a random question” I chuckled while kissing her lips.

She sighed and looked up at me through her lashes. “I know but think about it, like really think about it?”

I thought deeply about her question, fingers still grazing her spine. “Alright I’ll bite, I don’t know, I’ve always been trying to make it with whatever bullshit has been going on in my fucking life- just wanting to mean something to somebody, make music- for anybody out there to listen. To be the fucking king you know?”

She laughs. "And?"

"Way down the road maybe one day in the future- to live in the middle of nowhere with a dog, cats, and a family of my own. In my wooden home that I built."

Y/N's body went rigid with my words.

"But right now, no dog, no family just…just Bad Omens," I finished with a hopeful breath.

She hummed in response but turned her head to face the wall opposite of us, something bothering her. Not wanting to push it, I left another kiss on her spine before I slipped out of bed to discard of the condom in the bathroom trash, a light red color catching my attention.

Once back in the room, I slipped back underneath the covers.

"Angel?"

Another hum vibrated from her throat, sleep weighing heavy on her shoulders.

"Did you get your period?"

I swore I saw all the breath leave her body with my question and my mind panicked, thinking she was embarrassed.

"It's fine," I rubbed her back soothingly. "I just saw some blood on the condom, that's all."

When she still said nothing, I nudged her face with my nose. "Are you alright?"

"Yep," she said quietly.

"Stay till morning?" I asked, hopefully.

Finally, she turned to face me and left a kiss on my nose. "I have to go."

My heart fell into the dark pits of my stomach as I watched her slip out from underneath the sheet to gather her clothes. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, Noah." She slipped back into her clothes rather quickly. "I just have an early flight to catch and I know you have one too."

I shook my head and stood to my feet while slipping my briefs and joggers back on. "I don't buy that. We were great, where did you go just now?"

She doesn't want to leave, I can see that in the way her movements slowed once she was dressed, almost as if she was buying time for me to say something that would change her mind. But she refused to meet my gaze.

"Angel, look at me. What's the matter?" I asked again.

"Nothing-," she began with a sigh.

"Then why won't you stay?"

The fear of her slipping between my fingers was debilitating.

"Noah, you know I can’t; we can’t," Y/N stumbled over her words.

I stretched my arms out wide at my sides. "Why? Why can’t you?"

With her gaze still cast down to her feet, she shook her head. "You don’t want me Noah, trust me, you don’t want any part of this."

"Bullshit," I spat as my anger got the best of me.

Y/N's head snapped up towards me, finally looking me in my eyes and all I saw in hers were the wetness of tears. "I have this condition that already makes my life harder every fucking month. I don't need to bring you into it and ruin our future, alright?"

My heart stopped for a few seconds. "Condition? What the fuck, are you dying or something? I don't know what the hell this means."

"No," she rushed out. "I'm not dying. I-I don't want to get into this right now. All I know is that I would need you a lot more than you'd need me. And you deserve better than me, anyway."

"Don't-" I started while pointing a finger at her.

She ran a distressed hand through her hair. "You know it’s true Noah, please. This is hard enough as it is. Walking out right now."

The bed stood between us and I hated feeling so far from her even though we were still in the same room so I walked around it, standing a few inches in front of her now.

"I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life too, Y/N. Don’t sit there and tell me what I can and can’t handle. Don’t sit there and tell me what I want or don’t want. You’re just so afraid of us," I pointed between us.

She grasped her elbows to hug herself and I could see the way her mind was running, gears turning hastily. Y/N was shutting down in front of me and I fucking hated it.

"Don’t fucking do that. I’m not him," I assured her with a gentler tone.

All of this was a trauma response, something so embedded deep into her brain that it was the only way she knew how to act. I know she felt the same way that I did; it was clear with what happened not even an hour ago. If she didn't feel the way I did, she wouldn't have shown up tonight. Y/N wants to stay, I can see it in the way her eyes keep darting to the bed but the pain and trauma were too deep.

"I’m sorry angel, I just- you’re wrong. I know how I feel about you, and I know what you feel about me."

I went to reach for her hands but she took a step back, a few tears falling to the ground below.

"I know what I feel. It’s not you, it’s me, Noah."

Not that fucking line.

"No. Fuck, angel! Stop! The future hasn't even happened yet. Please, don't-what do you need to happen?"

Her bottom lip trembled as a broken sob clawed its wait through her throat. "I-I think we need to remain friends right now. I can't-I can't get lost in you, Noah. It's so fucking easy to. I think we need space."

"I-I don't fucking want that, Y/N. I just want you."

"Noah, please understand where I'm coming from," she begged.

I paced the room, hands shaking in anger. Defeat? I wasn't sure.

"Angel-I. Please, just-," I eventually sighed in defeat.

"I'm going to head out."

Y/N nodded towards the door after gathering her things and stepped past me to leave.

The fear of losing her completely is what made me give in to her wishes. As much as I wanted to fight her choice, I needed her as a friend more than something more. I'll take what I can get for right now until she realizes she feels the same; I know she does.

As she opened the door, my feet closed the distance between us in two large steps and I grasped her chin, forcing her to look at me. The tears burned with the need to fall but she held fast and strong, refusing to show me how badly walking away was affecting her.

I brushed my lips across hers in a soft kiss. "I can wait for you."

She tried to disagree but my grip was too strong. "Noah- I can’t ask you to do that. That’s not fair. You deserve-"

“Don’t tell me what you think I deserve." I let out a shaky breath. "Look, heaven knows I’m not getting over you, I can wait”

“Besides. I’m known for having a lot of fuckin patience. I will wait." I finished with a shrug.

If I wasn't already staring intently at her, I almost would have missed the small nod she gave me; but I didn't. I saw it.

“Goodnight Noah.”

With one final kiss, not enough to remember the way she tastes, Y/N let the door shut behind her as I burned my hateful gaze through it. She left? How the fuck could she just leave after the night we had together?

No, fuck that.

I barreled through the door in time to notice she was only two doors down, frozen in her spot.

"Angel," I called after her.

Slowly, she turned, and I sucked in a breath when I saw the redness in her eyes, puffy with teh tears she let out as soon as the door closed. Mine mirrored hers.

"Please," I begged. "Just come back to me. I'll wait for you."

Y/N hesitated but within that hesitation, something stood out clear as day; she took a small step towards me until that doubt filled the back of her mind yet again. I stayed in the hallway watching as she turned the corner, disappearing from my vision and life; my words not being enough to make her stay.

Back inside the room, I let the door slam shut and made a beeline toward the minibar. I screwed off the cap of the Hennessy, downing half of it in one go.

"Bitter ends to the night. I'm along for the ride," I raised the bottle in the air before taking another long, slow gulp with my eyes screwed shut.

Suddenly, they snapped open, and I rummaged around the mess of my room for my phone, quickly typing out a text to Jolly.

I need to write a song, now.

Only a few minutes passed before he responded, just enough time for me to pop open another bottle.

Now? It's three in the morning and we have nothing here.

Doesn't fucking matter. I'll figure it out. Come to my room.

Letting the bottle slip from my fingers, I stalked over to the wall and slid down until my ass hit the floor with a thud; the image of Y/N crying and walking away burned into my brain. I was out of breath, out of time trying to stop her but, in the end, everything has a price. And I was paying for it.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian and reader #noah sebastian x reader #noah sebastian reader insert #noah sebastian smut #enemies to lovers #right person wrong time #starcrossed lovers

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ebaylee422 · 2 years

Text

Decking the Halls

Steve Harrington X Girlfriend!reader

Author’s Note: Angst to cute sex, I’m not sorry. This is post Season 3, pre Season 4. I just love being angsty. I also really needed to clear my drafts soooo X-mas in March everyone!

Summary: Stockings aren’t the only things being stuffed this Christmas season. Steve has never decorated for Christmas, he’s embarrassed and doesn’t want to ruin your sprit by avoiding you. Don’t worry though, he shows you just how appreciative he is after.

Characters: Steve Harrington, Girlfriend reader, mentions of shitty parents and the rest of the ST nuggets. Best Friend Robin Buckley!!

Warnings/Tags: Smut (Minors DNI!!!) abandonment issues? as an intro, p in v sex, marking kink, praise kink, fem oral (receiving). breeding?

Word Count: 3k

Part One/?

You had tried everything to get Steve into the Christmas spirit: buying decorations for your apartment, getting matching pj’s, going to watch the lights in Indianapolis, watching Christmas movies, the Ice-Skating was most regrettable because you fell forward and knocked your teeth hard enough to bleed. Even planning a white elephant with him and his friends, sharing hot cocoa and warmth of your space heater. What you didn’t know is as soon as he left your place he was greeted by his parents' empty house. Decorated from some stupid trendy catalog his mother only glanced at before swiping a credit card. His father, not even home long enough to realize the tinsel monstrosity within the living room. The presents underneath were fake, they stopped being real when his father told him to grow up. That Santa wasn’t real, saying he needed to start giving instead of hoping for some joy from a fat man each holiday season. So that’s exactly what he did, the first Christmas he’d enjoyed in a long time was on Christmas of 83’, when he was with Nancy. They’d gotten each other meaningful gifts, it was the happiest Christmas he thought he’d ever had. Even if he went home unable to look at his pool outside for too long knowing his friend had died. Even if there were disgusting monsters trying to eat his friends when they had the chance. How horrible humans were in comparison, like the Russians nearly beating him to death at Starcourt. Instead of celebrating what he was thankful for, he felt immense guilt every holiday. He’d confided in you once about his survivor's guilt, as you had called it a couple months ago during an intense flashback. You’d comfort him, make sure he wasn’t alone. He didn’t want to be anyone’s burden, Steve knew you were worried about him it would show whenever he ‘had’ to leave for work or Robin’s, or get clothes from his place.

It all came to a standstill when you’d asked him if he would come pick a Christmas Tree with you. Wanting to have it up before the kids came over, finish decking-the-halls you’d told him. Only Steve didn’t know what picking out a Christmas Tree was, sure it’s self explanatory but what if he made a fool of himself. With his pretty rich boy ‘I’ve never had to pick one out’, it seemed too intimate. Sure you’d bared your body-mind-and-soul to him, but wanting to do something so domestic together like picking out a Christmas Tree. For your first Christmas together as a couple, it was scary for him. So instead of being a Scrooge so he could work on his feelings, he faked an illness even going as far as calling out sick today. Keith hadn’t been too happy but chopped it up to Steve sucking too much face on the job and gave him the day anyway. And he was back to square one, an empty ugly house with none of your warmth. People would think his middle name was self-sabotage, especially when that door-bell rang. He got up from his cocoon from the coach with a groan, an aching shooting up to his spine when his socked feet hit the freezing hardwood. Shined and renewed for the inevitable party his parents would throw this Christmas Eve for work friends, where they forgot they even had a son. He stopped dead in his tracks shaking the sleep from his eyes when they were met with yours, holding a tote bag while shaking the light dusty of snow off your figure. It melted into your skin leaving you shiny with the dew, nose and ears kissed pink while your chin and neck were tucked tightly with the collar of your coat and scarf. You smiled at him as he studied your form, like an angel sent just for him. He was bundled up in simple joggers, thick wool socks and heavy blanket around his shoulders worn like a cape tucked around his body, but shirtless still despite it being nearly as cold inside as it is outside. Shaking your body of the remaining snow, laying the tote bag of groceries and sick necessities you’d brought over on the stairs so you could slide out of your heavy snow covered boots.

“Hi baby, how r’ you feeling?” you asked him with a voice full of sticky sweetness and adoration. His face changed in that moment from shock to guilty, you felt the change floating in the air like oil through water.

“What are you doing here?” He asked louder than either of you had expected, causing you to turn his way fully as you began to undo the ties of your coat.

“I came to check on you, bring you some-”

“Why?” He scoffed, tucking the blanket to cover himself from the breezing air flow of the open hall. You were wearing a red corduroy skirt, with black stocking underneath and a cream sweater that didn’t even compare to how soft your hair was laid across your shoulders. You looked at him like he hung up the stars, even though you were the brightest thing about his life.

“Robin called me worried about you saying you called out because you were sick. So I canceled the tree plans to come check on you because you didn’t call me. I even whipped up some Chicken and Rice soup and scrunched up a couple medicines.”

“You shouldn’t have done that, I’m fine Y/N. You should go get your tree and I’ll see you on Friday like you planned.” he brushed off your kindness,

“Well I wanted to take care of you.” you told him shyly, "You haven't been around as often."

“Okay thanks.” he shook his head, body and tone still uncomfortable and unmatched of your own tenderness.

“Do you not want me here or something?” You scoffed with affection grabbing the bag from the stairs, stepping in front of him giddy with untamable affection.

“No.” He answered quickly and when your face dropped, his own heart went with it when you backed away from him. “No, I mean yes but not right now. I’m just-”

“It’s fine, Steve." You cut him off, turning away and grabbing your stuff. "I get it, I’m sorry I could’ve called.” he stopped you putting out his hand as an olive branch. You took it without hesitation, sniffling away the tears that built up for weeks of you arguing and avoiding each other.

“Don’t you dare apologize, especially to me.” He took your reddened cheeks in his hands as he pressed a kiss to your temple, “I’m just being an idiot, I’m sorry but I’m not even sick so you doing all this nice shit over-”

“I know you’re not sick, Steve. You’re a terrible faker.” You said factually, with a teasing tone. Still not looking at him but rather at your wiggling toes against the shiny floor.

“Oh really now? Robin didn’t tell you anything.”

“Well the strange, ‘Steve wanted my shift the same day he always has off’ the one day I could go tree picking with you. Then calling out and claiming illness, and not calling me is pretty obvious.” You let the bag fall again, his shoulders relaxed as you tugged on the length of his blanket. “Are you breaking up with me?” you asked with furrowed brows and a whimper to your voice.

“No!” Steve yelled, “No never no, I-I love you so much. You are my favorite everything Y/N.” He wrapped you both in the blanket tugging you flush against him. “I just have a hard time with the holidays, I don’t really know what to do with myself. I didn’t want to be embarrassed, it was a lot of pressure.” You both held each other silently letting the fear wash over both of you, until you giggled into his neck.

“I love you, Steve. Honestly, just talking to me would’ve saved us both a headache.” He sighed heavy as he wrapped his arms tighter around you, head resting on your chin.

“Jeez, what are we gonna do with me?” he whispered into your scalp, the fluffy hair on his chest tickling your cheek as you were held by his heart.

“I can think of one.” You pursed your lips, closing your eyes with your chin held high awaiting a kiss. He obliged you immediately, cupping your cheeks in his hands to accurately press his lips to yours. His hands were freezing, sending a shiver and gasp involuntarily out of you. Steve took the opportunity to lick into your mouth, tasting-ly. Pulling back before you could reciprocate, you whined gripping his biceps accidentally pushing off his blanket.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, nose brushing against yours.

"I didn't mean to pressure you, you just seem so sad."

"You make me happy."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, you could meet me in an ice cream shop above a secret Russian base. While enjoying strawberry more than chocolate ice cream and you'll still make me happy."

"Well, if our circumstances of meeting are the worst part of the relationship, I think that's a pretty good incentive to making better more normal memories, yeah?"

"Maybe." He kissed the tip of your still pink nose.

"Maybe, we could go back to my place? It's always freezing here." You added with a shiver making the hairs on your arms stand up.

"Not when you're here. Just stay here a second longer." His lips moved with their own incentive. It didn't take much convincing on either of your parts before you were upstairs in his room. A path of clothes thrown haphazardly off of each other through broken giggles and soft kisses, until your just in under clothes. He holds you to him as he opens the door to his room, and your feet barely touch the floor as he twirls the two of you around. Bringing you down with him as he falls backward on the bed with a thud. Kissing you with fondness, sweet like the honey color of his eyes. You loved him so much it hurt like the side pains after laughing so hard you teared up. Like when you realize that magic might not be real but people were and kindness. Kindness and compassion were the real magic. People found a reason to be with each other, even if it was once a year. Steve never had that. Everything in his life was transactional, Christmas, school, his parents, most other relationships. Those few closet to him probably haven't ever seen this side either. The checkered boy room with little to no traces of living aside from Steve's nightstand with Polaroids of everyone scattered about. A bin in his closet kept hidden away where he'd kept his Scoops Ahoy name tag, a letter from a pen-pal in sixth grade, ticket stubs of every drive in movie. Some more Polaroids for his eyes only you'd given him after you first started dating, and he'd left his shirt in your room. Even as you lay on top of him now, kisses sucked into your neck, his strong hands massaging your sides in worship. You couldn't help what words came out next.

"Come with me." You begged him breathlessly opening your eyes to see his lips swollen and slick, hair haloed and shaggy around his face and sheets. Like melting caramel against the ugly grey and navy bedding.

"Already babe, I haven't even touched you." He mumbled rocking his pelvis into yours, forcing your legs to accommodate him more with a thigh on either side of his hips. You sat up taller straddling him, a pout etched into your face.

"No, I mean. Come home with me, lets live together. I'll get rid of things you can bring whatever you want, I can dip into my tuition nest egg and buy whatever we need for the apartment. Make it yours too, or we can find another one that you like better. I just want you all to myself." He sat up holding onto your waist so you didn't fall, making you squeak with the shift in position. Your heart sank as his eyes were so wide they could've jumped out of his skull.

“What?” he asked as his breath caught in his throat, a pure swell of undoubtable happiness warming him from the tip of his nose down to his sock covered feet.

“It’s just, I wasn’t lying Stevie. I wanna take care of you, you give so much to every-” He kissed you, desperately. Teeth clashing and tongues forming together making you dizzy enough to loose balance upright on your knees. Pulling back to gasp for air, a string of spit connecting you to him. He wiped it away, tucking his head into your chest.

“You’re perfect. I’ll do anything to make you happy.”

“Even picking out a Christmas Tree with me?”

“I will grow you a damn Christmas Tree, even better I’ll get the kids to help me chop down one in my backyard!”

“Stevie! That’s dangerous.”

“Well, sweets.

Danger.

Is.

My middle name.” He trailed four kisses down your body, stopping just shy of your covered mound. Hooking his fingers under the band of your underwear, biting your hip making you buck up long enough for him to shimmy them off your legs.

“I thought your middle name was Alexander?”

“You won’t your own name once I’m done with you.” He said sultry, kneeling at the foot of the bed. Yanking your ankles to bring you closer to his mouth, spreading your legs wide and over his shoulders. You were beautiful, regardless what you were doing but letting him take care of you. Make you feel good and be vulnerable, made his head spin. Your lips were sticky with arousal, he could smell your sweet nectar begging for him to taste you. Marks still slightly visible from last time, he started there sucking and biting the mailable flesh.

“Stevie, please-” You cried out, hands trying to find purchase with his. He stopped sucking a bruise, eyes blown wide when he found yours. Locking your hands to your sides,

“Your so sweet, baby. Asking so nicely.” He chastely kissed on your hood, tongue licking underneath to wet and flick at your clit. You groaned and threw you head back, “So sweet, baby. Keep your legs open for me. I have a lot of apologizing to do down here.”

“Stevie, no I want you. Please.” You writhed on the bed trying to keep your legs spread for him, he blew cool air at your entrance causing you to clench around nothing. You body craved to be filled, senses overwhelmed of one thing: Steve, Steve, Steve!

“Just wanna warm you up, we have all the time in the world sweets. Wanna wreck this bed before leaving.” He was antagonizing you, teasing with his pretty words and slightly movements you couldn’t even respond him. He licked a line from your entrance to your clit, groaning at your taste. Hips colliding with the end of his bed to relieve pressure as he sucked your clit into his mouth. Rolling the bud with his tongue, your nail dug into his knuckles as you shook with ecstasy.

“ ‘S so good, Stevie. Don’t stop-” You were so pent up from earlier all it took was a few more rolls of his tongue against you and for you to fall apart. Concentrating on keeping your legs open for him, as he licked you clean. Nudging his nose against your sensitive clit, he let go of one of your hands tangling it in his hair.

“Hold it out of my face, baby. I want one more before I cum inside you.” He coated his fingers with your release, slowly sliding in one as his tongue still fucked into you. You couldn’t help rocking your hips against his face when he added another finger inside you. Scissoring, stretching you and rubbing against your spongy spot. You tugged at his locks when he came back up to suck at your clit again, you didn’t even notice the heat break in your belly until you gushed and clenched around his fingers. You pushed at his forehead from sensitivity, barely able to catch your breath when you pulled him up to kiss you. lips and chins dripping of you. Trailing your nails down his soft tummy following the happy trail underneath his boxers, you met him halfway stroking his thick cock with your slick. Still coating his hand, pre-cum dripping from his tip making the sounds completely pornographic.

“ ‘m not gonna last baby, want you so bad.” He whispered against your lips, breathing heavy with a sheen of sweat layering you both in the smell of sex.

“Need you too, wanted you ages ago.” You sassed, making him laugh against your cheek as he stood. You wrapped your legs around his waist, his cock twitched when it brushed against the inside of your thigh.

“You gotta big mouth on you, sweet girl.”

“You better do something about it, Harrington.” With a roguish grin he ran his length over your clit once before pushing ever so slightly inside. Taking your breaths away, you were the girl and only girl who could take Steve’s fat cock completely. He just has to ease you into it, inch by inch until his hip bone grazed the back of your thighs. Steve stood tall and far enough away you couldn’t kiss him from where you were sprawled out under him. You pulled and squeezed at your breasts still contained by your bra. His cock glistening with your slick as he pulled his hips back, then pushing deeper inside his sack pressed tight against your ass. Steve nearly loss his balance when you clenched around him, putting his hands under your knees. Folding you in half made it feel like he was in your throat, he leaned over you the pressure of his body as he set a ruthless pace set flames in your abdomen. Pounding his cock into you over and over again moaning out praises as he bullied all the way to your cervix. Punching breaths out of you watching as your tits bounced, you had enough pulling him fully on top you. Hands indenting his shoulders as your hips met his, clit pulsing and with need.

“You feel so good. Shit, shit- I’m cumming, cumming inside.” Steve’s core tighten as he ran two finger over your clit, heat erupted across your body. You milked Steve dry, his warm seed and your three orgasms dripping from each others groin. You pulled him on top of you, comforted by his weight on you as his cock softened inside you.

“Do you really want too?” You asked in the post orgasm bliss, running a hair through his now tangled locks. “I don’t want to trap you with amazing sex and joy but it’s definitely a perk.” Steve rose onto his elbows, still seated inside you. Brushing the hair out of your face, with softness.

“I’m sure we can wreck this bed a lot more than just cum stains.” Pushing at his chest, he pulled out of you gently. Scurrying to his bathroom where you listened as he turned on the faucet in the shower. Sitting up, he came back with all his glory. Hand raised for you to take, the same olive branch you’d given him at Starcourt. All this time. “I can’t wait to spend Christmas in our home, together.”

You’d never been so excited to spend the holidays with anyone else.

Masterlist

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things season 3 #oneshot #no minors allowed #reader insert #tis the season #holiday themed

462 notes · View notes

gimmethatagustd · 2 years

Note

If you are still taking requests I found this and I thought it was funny so I wanted to see if you could please write something with demon Hoseok and this idea thank you😊

satan: I HAVE COME TO TAKE YOU TO THE DEPTHS OF H-

me: wow you're tall

satan: thanks?

me : how tall are you?

Satan : i dunno like 6'6 6'11 with the horns?

me [ twirling hair] omg with horns! You are so funny

NOT TODAY, SATAN | JHS

If you had known the demon tasked with reaping your soul would be a total #daddy you would have gone to Hell sooner!

» pairing: demon!hoseok x reader

» genre: BTS | 18+ | supernatural | humor | a lil bit of smut

» wc/date: 3.7k | october 2022

» notes: THIS REQUEST MADE ME CACKLE. i decided to post it for spooky szn~ so i hope that's ok 🥺 (i'm also dying cuz there's like lowkey unintentional parallels to this and my hobi idol au that's really killing me)

» masterlist

» what was jai listening to? all the good girls go to hell - billie eilish

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Purgatory looked like the DMV.

You should have expected it, honestly. Wasn’t it represented as some type of waiting room in Beetlejuice? Or maybe you were misremembering. Ever since you’d stepped through the front doors, your mind felt foggy. When you looked back through the windows, no parking lot met your gaze. Instead, a soft gray haze was pressed against the glass, causing a bit of condensation to gather.

How had you gotten here?

The answer to that seemed a bit foggy, too.

“Are you going to take a fucking number or just stand there like an idiot?”

The bristled voice shocked you into action. Stepping forward, you ripped a number tag from the stand directly in front of the door and moved to the side for the voice behind you. A few droplets of water splattered against your ankles when the person reached for their tag.

You suppressed a gasp.

She was completely soaked, so wet that she left a trail of water wherever she walked, like some kind of snail or slug. It was difficult to tell what her original complexion was because her skin was now a deep turquoise. Bits of twigs and what looked like seaweed twisted into her hair.

You followed the stranger’s water trail through the folding chairs lining the large waiting room. The speckled brown carpet squished beneath your sneakers. A bit of water was leaking inside to wet your socks.

“Number 746!”

A robotic voice beeped out the number over the speakers just as you sank into an empty folding chair. A man with large, dirty bandages wrapped around his head and over one eye stood from his seat beside you. He clutched a folder of papers to his chest and limped to the counter at the front of the room.

Three people in matching black professional uniforms sat behind the counter. You thought they resembled bank tellers from how they were spread out with glass barriers separating each person’s portion of the counter. The first two employees sat too far away to make out important details of their faces, but the third was only a few feet away from you.

He was easily the most beautiful person you’d ever seen in your life. The sharp cut of his jawline and the thin length of his nose slicing through high cheekbones and deep-set eyes made it difficult for you to pull your gaze away from him. Luckily, he was none the wiser of your ogling, for his attention was spent on assisting the person standing in front of the counter. You were free to marvel at his angular features, eventually shifting your eyes from the bow of his lips to examine some of his gentler features. His hair was dark like his outfit and fell soft against his forehead. Poking out of the layered waves were two thick… horns.

You pressed your thumbs into your eyes, but when you moved them away the horns remained.

They twisted at the tips, spiraling in opposite directions. A swirling pattern was etched into each of them. It reminded you of fingerprints.

“Number 749!”

You glanced down at the crumbled tag in your hand. 749.

With a sigh, you trudged up to the counter and stood in front of the beautiful man with twisted horns poking out of dark, luscious hair.

“I need an official form of identification and your death certificate.”

You stared at him blankly.

“An official form of identification and your death certificate,” he repeated with more force.

“I… don’t have a death certificate.”

Were you dead? How had you died? How could you have possibly received a death certificate if you were dead? You assumed your mother would have it; that was how things went, right?

The name badge clipped to his shirt read Hoseok, Assistant Manager. Assistant Manager of what? Purgatory?? What in the fuck was going on.

Hoseok turned to the computer sitting off to the side of his desk.

“What is your full name and date of birth?”

You gave him the information he was looking for and leaned forward to watch him tap away at the keyboard. What appeared to be a profile of you flashed across the screen. There was a photo of you, the one from your driver’s license. A few stats about you like your height and where you were born. Toward the bottom of the screen in large red block letters read TIME OF DEATH. You were pretty sure the date was recent, but you didn’t know what day it was currently. Before you could read further, Hoseok closed out the page.

“I need you to come with me,” Hoseok said abruptly. He gestured for you to step around the counter.

You took a look over your shoulder. No one else needed to go behind the counter, as far as you could tell. Although, you hadn’t paid much attention to the other people waiting for… whatever it was everyone was doing here. You still didn’t know.

With a nervous inhale that tickled your throat, you followed the… man? Whatever he was, through a door marked for employees only.

(So they were called employees. Hence the Assistant Manager badge, and all. What the fuck kind of job was this?)

Scurrying behind him to catch up with his long gait, you noticed that this person was tall. Like, impossibly tall. Come to think of it, it wasn’t just his height that was staggering. Everything about his presence seemed larger than life, like the very walls of the hallway needed to shift and expand to accommodate the power radiating off of him as he walked. You kept your eyes trained on his lean shoulders, watching the way his shoulder blades and back muscles made his shirt ripple when he breathed or turned around the corner.

“Ahem.” You cleared your throat.

Silence.

“Ahem.”

You did a little skip to speed up your walking and finally fell in line with the man. You flashed him what you’d consider an award-winning grin.

“Hoseok, right? You’re really fucking tall.”

He glanced down at you out of the corner of his eye.

So, a man of few words. Unless he was snapping at you about IDs and death certificates. Apparently.

“Where are we going?”

Hoseok immediately halted, catching you by surprise and nearly causing you to trip.

“Here.” With an outstretched arm, Hoseok opened the door to a simple office. He held it for you as you crossed the threshold.

“Please, take a seat.”

You eased into one of the chairs in front of the desk, which Hoseok sat behind once he snapped the door shut. The fabric scratched into the back of your legs.

Up close, Hoseok was even more breathtaking. You found that the horns weren’t as much of a creepy turnoff as you may have initially thought. Somehow, paired with the shimmering red tint to his eyes and the slits he had instead of proper circular pupils, you were rather turned on by this… otherworldly look he had going for him. It was spooky, in an “emo kid who works at Hot Topic and thinks Happy Tree Friends is edgy” kind of way. So… not spooky at all. Just endearing to the part of your brain where you’d locked up all your teen angst.

“Do you know why you’re here?”

You watched a transparent film slide sideways across Hoseok’s eyes and you realized he blinked with a third eyelid.

Weird, but kind of hot. Fuck conventional beauty standards! You could dig it.

“Because a handsome stranger brought me here?” You took a shot in the dark, though Hoseok didn’t appear to have followed you. He stared at you with his third eyelid and his slitted pupils and his sharpened teeth.

Wow, he had really pointy teeth.

“You’re here because…” Hoseok drummed his fingers against the surface of his desk. His nails were black and chipped. “You were never reaped.”

“Reaped? Like, the Grim Reaper?”

A low hiss came from the back of Hoseok’s throat. The sound made your skin prickle.

“The Grim Reaper is not real.” His voice slithered out of his mouth at the same time his tongue did. It was red and forked. “You were supposed to be reaped by one of us when you died,” he gestured to himself, “a demon.”

Well, obviously he was a demon. Or else he had a great sense of fashion.

You leaned forward to rest your arms on Hoseok’s desk. If he thought his freaky tongue and animalistic eyes were going to scare you, he was terribly wrong. You’d been on Vampirefreaks.com back when it was still a social media platform.

“Listen, Hoseokie. Can I call you Hoseokie?” Silence. “I don’t know why I’m here and I don’t know how I got here, but I promise you, I am not dead.”

With a sigh, Hoseok flipped open the laptop on his desk. After a few moments of typing, he slid it toward you, adjusting the screen to make it easier for you to see.

There was your profile again. Hoseok quickly scrolled down to the section you hadn’t gotten to read earlier, the part about when you’d died.

“In my records, it states you are dead. As of,” he turned the screen toward himself for a moment, “As of 7 PM yesterday. Yet there is no record of how you died, where you died, nor which demon escorted you here. And no death certificate on file.”

Clearly, the missing death certificate situation had rubbed the guy the wrong way.

Maybe you should have felt more concerned that you had a snake-eyed self-proclaimed demon trying to convince you that you were dead and chilling out in Purgatory unchaperoned. But this was all fake, obviously. A dream. There was nothing to worry about.

“I don’t know what to tell you, Hoseokie.” You gave the man - demon - a shrug.

Hoseok’s eyebrows pulled toward each other, causing the skin on his forehead to crease.

“Well, I suppose it doesn’t matter.”

“Oh really?”

Hoseok pursed his lips and gave you a curt nod.

“It already states here that you’ll be going to Hell, so I may as well just reap you myself since no one else has. I need to go downstairs anyway. We’ve been getting a high volume of damned souls recently and working overtime can be sustainable for only so long…”

Whatever else Hoseok had to say about “demon burnout” during a time when debauchery was at its highest on Earth (“Aside from the 70s, wow, the 70s was a time.”), you didn’t hear the rest of it. There were more important things to worry about.

You were going to Hell.

“Wait, wait, wait, Hoseokie, wait a minute.” You curled your fingers around the edge of his laptop screen. “I’m going to Hell? For what?! I have done nothing wrong, ever, in my life.”

This was the part where Hoseok was supposed to say, “I know this, and I love you.”

Except he didn’t! The bastard just let his gorgeous mouth hang open and flicked his freaky forked tongue over those pearly fangs.

“I beg to differ.”

“How would you know?”

A small smirk flitted across Hoseok’s face and you felt your stomach twist into knots.

“Your memories, your experiences, your life - none of that belongs to you.”

You couldn’t tell which was more unnerving, the words he said or the dark tone he said them in. With a shiver, you chose to ignore whatever riddle he was speaking to you in and tried to change your strategy.

“Hoseokie, baby.” You ran your perfectly normal tongue along your lips and leaned even further into your companion’s personal space - as much as you could with a desk in between you. “Let’s not get carried away here.”

“Proper protocol was not followed, so we must rectify that,” Hoseok huffed. His shoulders sagged slightly, causing him to lean inward. Maybe your cute nickname was finally breaking him.

“Do we really?”

“Yes.”

“But, really? Hoseokie, babe, do I look like I belong in Hell?”

The demon blinked with his third eyelid a few times. You watched the slit of his pupils flicker as he genuinely took the time to look you over. It was a hypothetical question and now you were scared of the actual answer. He was a demon, after all. He’d know what a damned soul looked like, right?

“Well.” You watched Hoseok’s throat bob as he swallowed. “You did read a lot of serial killer fanfiction on AO3.”

You scoffed, leaning back in your chair and crossing your arms against your chest.

“Are you kink-shaming me right now?”

Hoseok mirrored your scoff and busied himself with tidying up a stack of loose papers on his desk, but you saw the way his cheeks turned a healthy shade of pink.

Interesting.

“So, I’m going to Hell because I read One Direction serial killer AUs? Really? That’s why I’m going to Hell?”

“No!” Hoseok huffed again, louder this time. He ran his fingers through his hair and gave you a pleading look. “I don’t know! I don’t decide who goes to Hell, I just take them there!”

“Then don’t take me.”

It seemed like the obvious solution, but Hoseok looked at you like you’d threatened to kill him.

“I have to take you.”

“Oh yeah? Or else what?” You were back to leaning against his desk, your head in your hands and your elbows on the surface. “Satan damns you to some horrible eternal punishment?”

Hoseok turned his head and mumbled to the side, “Something like that.”

You wanted to ask him what it mattered if he was already a demon working for Satan, but you figured that would push him a bit too far. Instead, you were just going to beg. Considering the circumstances, you allowed yourself to do it without hurting your self-respect. Dire times, dire measures.

“Hoseokie, please,” you whined with your bottom lip jutted out. You reached out to hook your finger around one of his, pulling his hand away from where it rested against his chin. “Please, don’t take me to Hell. Let me stay here, with you.”

“With me?” Hoseok’s eyes widened, slitted pupils dilating into ovals.

“Mhmm, wouldn’t that be nice?” you purred, lightly tracing the lines of his palm with your index finger. “You’re so pretty and you look so stressed. What did you say earlier, about burnout? They aren’t taking care of you here, are they, Hoseokie?”

The demon bit his lip. His razor-sharp teeth pressed deep indents into what you knew were soft pink lips.

“I could help you out, Hoseokie, baby.”

Those dark eyes shimmered red and finally met your gaze, though his face was still flushed and his expression almost… timid.

“Help me out?” he murmured, almost as though he were talking himself through the conversation rather than asking you a question.

“Mhmm…”

You pressed your hands flat against the desk and hoisted yourself on top of it. The stack of papers Hoseok had just fixed went flying. He weakly reached out to stop a few of them from slipping off and floating to the carpeted floor.

“I don’t know.” Hoseok’s voice wavered, though you had to give him credit for his ability to maintain eye contact with you as you scooted across the desk.

“I think you do know, Hoseokie.”

Hoseok shook his head, third eyelids putting in work to blink away the shock when you eased yourself into his lap.

You’d been so caught up on how tall and menacing he’d looked in the hallway that you hadn’t stopped to consider the rest of his details, like how firm and comfortable his thighs were. You wiggled your ass to get settled, eliciting a low groan from the demon whose red eyes still rounded under your gaze.

“I’m going to get in trouble,” he pleaded with you when you dug your fingers into his hair and yanked his head backward. “I really don’t want to get in trouble.”

“And I really don’t want to go to Hell.” You dug your teeth into the soft skin of his throat and Hoseok let out a whimpered hiss. “Do you see our problem here?”

Of course, he could see the problem, but Hoseok was driven mute by your free hand palming his cock through his pants. His hold on your waist was bruisingly tight, but you kept a firm grip on his hair and a hot hand on his crotch. There was no way he was getting an upper hand in this, not that you expected him to. He was whimpering and pliant underneath you already.

Maybe you were absolutely insane, but if you had to suck some demon dick to get out of Hell, you were going to fucking do it. No matter how weird it probably looked.

“Y/N, wait.” Hoseok shuddered as you popped open the button of his pants and dragged down the zipper. “Listen to me, it’s not, it’s not a good idea.”

You let your fingertips dance along the waistband of his underwear. You weren’t sure why it was funny that he was wearing underwear; it just seemed like such a silly thing for a demon to need. Out here reaping souls and getting angry over death certificates, and going to the store to buy underwear after work.

It was just funny.

“Why not, Hoseokie? Don’t tell me they don’t let you have a little fun around here.” You batted your eyes at him and slide your hand beneath the fabric.

“It’s not- fuck.”

Hoseok tried to lean forward, to curl into himself, when you pressed your thumb against his leaking slit, but you kept his head pulled backward by his hair.

“Now, I’m gonna tell you what we’re gonna do, okay Hoseokie baby?”

The demon opened his mouth to speak and you shivered as his forked tongue wet his lips.

“Okay.”

“Good little demon, thank you,” you cooed praise that made his face flush an even deeper red. “I’m going to suck your dick and then you’re gonna delete whatever record you have of me and we’re going to forget I was ever even here, alright?”

When Hoseok didn’t speak, you squeezed the head of his cock.

“Fuck, yes, yes, yes, alright,” he sputtered.

“Good.”

The bright side to all of this was that his dick didn’t look any different from any other dick you’d ever seen, although it did seem a bit long. Which was fine. You had hands, didn’t you? You knew how to do a little two-hand twist when needed.

Just as you were about to slide off Hoseok’s lap and get on your knees, the door to his office flung open so hard it slammed against the wall.

“Oh fuck,” Hoseok gulped. He quickly stuffed his cock back inside his pants and zipped his pants up with trembling fingers.

“Oh fuck is right. What the fuck is going on here?”

You turned to look over your shoulder at the person who owned such a smooth, sinister voice that dripped enough malice for you to drown in it. You felt your entire body grow cold when you were met with slitted eyes that glowed even more brightly than Hoseok’s. The eyes roamed your face, your body, your position still straddling Hoseok’s lap. And you did the same, your human eyes taking in the man’s black fitted suit, the swell of his thighs beneath the fabric, the pout of his lips, the craters his dimples made in his cheeks as he sucked on his teeth in seething anger.

“I-I-I-I, Your Majesty,” Hoseok’s tongue fumbled over the words as he tried shoving you off of him.

Oh shit, was this God? He was way too hot to be God.

You stood when Hoseok did, the two of you blinking with your eyes wide and mouths hanging open like idiots in front of the sharply dressed man. Just past the doorway, you could see a few other men flanking the entrance, as though they were guarding it.

“Don’t fucking call me Your Majesty while your cock is twitching in your pants, Hoseok. Have some decency,” the dimpled man chastised with a snort.

Was God allowed to curse? You supposed he was, but multiple F-bombs and a casual “cock” thrown around seemed like a lot for a guy who was meant to be the holiest of the holy.

“And you.”

You poked your index finger against your chest when the man suddenly loomed over you.

“Me?”

“You’re supposed to be with me.”

You rose your eyebrows and shot Hoseok a look, but he had his eyes on the floor.

“Oh… you’re not God…”

You felt fire lick and burn up your chest and across your throat when the man leaned his head back to bellow a laugh so deep you swore the walls moved just as they had for Hoseok when he walked.

“Sweet of you to think so highly of the Devil, little human.”

Aw, fuck.

You were going to Hell.

“Now, listen, the One Direction serial killer AUs weren’t actually that bad. Like, if you’d just give it a chance, you’d understand,” you began.

“Reasoning with me is futile, pet.”

The sound of your teeth clamping shut echoed through the room. You probably should have been scared of how poisonous his tone sounded, but excitement thrummed in your stomach.

No one had ever called you pet before. It was kind of cute.

“Now, let’s go, shall we?”

If Satan had a problem with the way you whimpered when he wrapped a smooth, tan hand around your bicep to haul you out of the room, he didn’t make any indication. If anything, you thought he squeezed you a bit tighter.

“I didn’t think Satan would be so buff,” you murmured and you heard Hoseok choke.

You’d all but forgotten about the guy.

“Oh! Hoseokie!” You twisted your neck around to face him as Satan began leading you away. “Thanks for hanging out! I forgive you for being such a rule follower!”

You turned up to look at Satan’s face which was a bit hard to do considering he was so tall and all legs and pecs that looked better than any boobs you’d ever seen. It was very distracting.

“You’re not going to damn him to some horrible eternal punishment, are you?”

“I think working here is punishment enough, don’t you?”

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my work

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jvnluvr · 1 year

Text

torn lies ; itoshi sae ♡

author’s note: i came up with a something on a whim today after my lovely follower @uvbnr21-killer requested so i'm sorry it took a bit. nobody saw the first post, i forgot to add tags so i deleted it and now am rewriting it. kaiser angst would hurt my soul, but sae fits this perfectly. i'm so nervous & scared because i never write angst so i hope this is okay.

itoshi sae couldn't, wouldn't and will never understand you. maybe that's why he keeps coming back into your life.

itoshi sae x f!reader

notes: foul language, implied toxic relationship, reader has anxiety and hand tremors, sae acts like he's innocent when he's not, ft. isagi and rin

"i understand. now say it with me, we're gonna be okay.”

that was the last lie itoshi sae could say to you.

how long had it been? with how busy your life had become, itoshi sae was just a distant thought in the back of your mind. a man you wished you had never met, never wanted, or never had been with. how could a man, even like him, be so heartless? you knew him, you knew that wasn't him, but that doesn't mean he was going to change.

as much as you could have dwelled upon it, cried about it, have gotten angry about it, and all these other complex emotions humans could feel, there was simply no point. itoshi sae has been long gone, and life had made other plans. you became a professional athlete, just like itoshi-. wait, you just said you would stop thinking about him.

see, that was the entire problem. taking the same career path of the man who was once yours just made you think about him more. your mind was tainted with the thought of sae. you couldn't keep living like this, life was already miserable as is. you couldn't go out in public without having to hide away like you were an embarrassment. nobody knew, but they knew. they knew from the way you would rarely come out in public anymore, the way cameras caught your hands tremoring trying to talk to interviewers.

…

"can't you just leave me the fuck alone?”

"i’m your girlfriend for fuck's sake! you can talk to me for 5 minutes a day if you're really that busy."

"yeah? 'know what, you aren't worth those 5 extra fucking minutes.

…

what came after that was more yelling, then it came to tears, and finally, you left what you had once called home, what you had once called your forever. you slammed an awakening in itoshi sae's face before you left, for good.

"[name]! tell us how you feel about the upcoming match." an interviewer asked, shoving the mic close to your lips. "i think it'll be good." you let out a very monotoned voice, signaling that your anxiety was starting to get worse again. "ah, please share some more thoughts with-"

"oh look! it's itoshi sae!! why is he here?" your eyes widened as you followed the voice, and it came from all across the area. " think she'll leave with us, thanks for your time." a smooth, yet deep voice replied near your ear before you were dragged away. you already knew who it was, so you looked back once last time, seeing the interviewer run off in the voice's direction.

"everyone is obsessed with him, it makes me sick." you sighed out, your breathing starting to get shallower. “thanks for dragging me out of there.” the man let you go, letting you sink to the ground and hug your knees. "stupid media people, forget them. how are you feeling?” isagi yoichi asked, crouching down to meet your pained eyes.

"'Il be fine, jus' hope this fuckin' tremors stop before i have to go on." your hands were burning. not because of the tremors, nor was it because of isagi. because every single thing you did reminded you of itoshi sae. you were more than just frustrated because of this, so you couldn't help but try and rip your hair out as your eyes watered.

"fuckin' asshole, how could he say that even 5 minutes for me was a waste of his time," you mumbled, not wanting to lose your composure in such a public place. "sae-san will never change, [name]. you deserve a lot better anyway. c'mon, the other guys are waiting for you." he held your hands as he helped you get up, but it was all mindless movement in your eyes. walking into the stadium, across the bleachers, everything felt blank.

itoshi sae is the worst.

how could he do such a thing?

was that really the sae you fell in love with?

no, he'll come back, right?

he didn't mean it.

whatever, fuck him anways.

an inner monologue with yourself that always bought you to shreds. what point was there in constantly being in a stage of denial when the evidence was right in your hollow eyes? you so desperately wished for your feelings to change, for your heart to not crave, desire, to want to love itoshi sae. but he always walked away. away from his friends, his family, from you.

"[name?] is it sae again?' itoshi rin snapped you out of your trance again. you blinked widely a couple times, before your tired eyes met rin's. '''t wouldn't usually be this bad, stupid fuckin' guy decided to waltz into here today." you grumbled to him, in which he sighed.

"sorry, [name.] even i don't know why he keeps coming back. it's best if you just ignore him though. sae doesn't actually care, we've seen."

yeah, itoshi sae doesn't care about you.

…

then why his is gaze so warm?

you're on the field, staring into the crowds of people when you see him. you could only manage a second of eye contact, but immediately you felt like your heart was being ripped out of your chest.

…

"don't do that."

"do what, [name]?"

"don't look at me like you still care.”

…

"good game out there today, [name]."

"you don't mean it. why are you back?" you could feel the tremors coming back, despite your best efforts to control them.

"tch, i'm not allowed to tell someone 'good job?"'

"should you fuckin' be allowed to break someone's heart? no! but ya did it anyway. now get out of my sight, stupid egoist." it's vicious, but it's also been long overdue.

[name], it's been so long, why are you still hung up-"

"you're an asshole who ruined my life, all because you're a narcissist, self-centered and close-minded. you want me to spell out more?"

for once, your voice stood against him.

his eyes widened, an unmistakable look in his eyes saying that he didn't expect that, not out of you.

and for the first time, you walked away from itoshi sae.

#itoshi sae #blue lock #blue lock x reader #blue lock x y/n #blue lock x you #blue lock imagines #blue lock itoshi sae #bllk x reader #itoshi sae x reader #itoshi sae x y/n #itoshi sae x you #blue lock angst

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ayelbee · 2 years

Text

MORE THAN LOVE | K. MBAPPÉ | 2

previous chapter | next chapter

Summary: Sometimes even love is not enough for relationships. But it's fine because you are over it. But getting again in a contact with his younger brother wasn't smart.

TW: shitty english grammer, poor writing skills and few swear words

Notes: Hey, firstly i want to thank all of you for the activity on my previous post, i didn't expect that! It means the world to me, so thank you very much <3 ! Also if you want to be added to the tag list let me know. And lastly, i know that today's part isn't really entertaining but i promise that the next chapter will be better.

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You loved fridays, not just because you knew that weekend was ahead, but also because on friday nights new exhibitions were opening. This friday was the opening of the exhibition that you were working on since October, the author of the paintings herself was attending to it which made everything even more special. You were so excited.

It was a week after Ethan's birthday and in a meantime, you both decided that the two of you will meet tomorrow for your movie marathon. That was also the reason why you spent the whole yesterday cleaning your apartment and why you also spent three hours grocery shopping so you could have all the snacks you both love so much.

Now you were just getting ready for the opening. You weren't able to decide if you should wear a long-sleeved dress or wide-leg jeans with a backless top and a blazer over it. You were more into the dress, but your best friend on the other hand was begging you to choose your second option.

"Y/n if you are going to go with that dress no one will pay attention to those paintings there." she laughed, you could also hear a door opening in the background.

"You are ridiculous." if you two weren't face timing each other you would probably poke her in the shoulder for not really helping you.

"Look, even Lukas thinks that you should go with the jeans, right Lukas?" now you saw her boyfriend's face on your screen who was almost aggressively nodding his head. In the end, you decided to stick with their option as you started to grow more nervous about running out of time.

"Okay, thank you, guys. See you next week." you waved your hand to say goodbye and then just hung up.

You finished your look with a purse and nice pair of heels, catching a quick glance into the mirror before rushing from your flat to catch the cab that was already waiting for you outside of your apartment building. In the cab you noticed a notification from Ethan on your phone, he was asking for your address so his mum could drop him off at your place tomorrow. You answered with your address attached.

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"You really did a good job with this." your colleague Maria told you as you were both looking at the painting in front of you.

"Thank you, but all I was doing was really listening to the painter herself and how she feels about her paintings and how she thinks that they should be displayed." you shot her a smile as she rubbed your back.

"Oh Y/n if I could be humble as you are." she laughed and you joined her. It was almost midnight, most people were already gone just a few people stayed. You were getting more and more tired and Maria noticed that. "You should go home, you already left here your body and soul." she smiled at you.

"You are probably right, I will just go to say goodbye to the rest." you hugged her as she said goodbye too.

"And Y/n," she called as you were getting more distant from her. You turned your head her direction as she continued "don't forget to be proud on yourself." you shot her one last smile before heading to the last group of people.

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The cold air was hugging your body as you were waiting for your cab, but you didn't care, because you were happy. Happy about yourself, happy about tonight, and happy about the fact that six months ago you never thought that you will be able to smile without him.

You were looking on your instagram on the post you made earlier tonight. Scrolling thru the comments your smile growing just bigger and bigger.

@y/n: Thanks to everyone who came to the opening tonight, it was great! And to the people who weren't able to make it the exhibition is on display till February 15th! Also big thanks to @anxt herself for attending tonight and sharing with us her stories about creating these master pieces!

liked by @hiba_abouk_ and 6 553 others

A familiar voice pulled you away from scrolling thru the comments. Your head automatically snapped upwards just so you could meet with well known sight.

Kylian was walking on the pavement a few meters from you with Achraf on his side. You froze, you didn't see him since August and now you weren't even ready for it now.

Achraf, who was talking to him noticed that Kylian wasn't listening to him. He looked at his face, trying to notice what was he so focused on, and after he saw you, he knew why Kylian was drafted into his own world. Getting closer to you, Achraf slightly pushed into Kylian trying to make him stop staring at you so hard. Which he did.

You on the other hand were praying for your cab to be here as soon as possible. Your wish came true. At that moment Kylian with Achraf were two meters away from you. Achraf saw how awkward this situation already was, so he just said hi to you. You returned his greeting, now saying simple hello two both of them. You couldn't hear Kylian's answer as you jumped into the taxi as soon as it stopped. The driver pushed on the gas as he started to drive away. You exchanged one last look with Kylian who was looking like he just saw a ghost, which he also was in your mind.

"What the fuck was that Kylian?" Achraf pushed again into Kylian as he was still staring at the cab leaving in the dark.

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That night you ended up falling asleep with tears on your cheeks. Making you more than confused. Your breathing getting heavier as you were thinking about seeing Ethan tomorrow. You didn't know why you reacted that way, you know that you couldn't avoid Kylian forever. Paris was a giant city, but Kylian was everywhere.

Because Kylian was Paris and Paris was Kylian.

"What are we going to do today love?" Kylian looked at you as you were lying on his chest.

"I would lie all day in bed and maybe order pasta from that small restaurant you like so much." You answer as you were drawing small circles on his bare chest. Today you both had the day off. No work, no plans, no training or game. Days like this were your favorite days.

"Or we could do something more fun." Kylian was playing with your other hand. Making your fingers tangled up with each other.

"Are you trying to tell me that cuddling with my isn't fun?" you furrowed your brows, making not a nice face at him.

"No, cuddling with you is my favorite thing. But if we are gonna be just lying all day i'm gonna be all stiff tomorrow." He placed a kiss on your head.

"Okay, so what is Mr. I'm gonna be stiff tomorrow suggesting that we should do today?" you let out a simple giggle.

"I think that we should go for a walk as tourists, you know? Getting dressed up so nobody will notice us, going to see the places everybody loves, eating street food and watching the sunset along the Seine." he looked into your eyes, making butterflies in your stomach. But a quick realization came after.

"Well, I'm still a tourist that doesn't belong here." your smile getting smaller now as you referred to a comment that was made under your instagram post today, which made Kylian angry.

"That's not true Y/n. You belong here" You pulled out from him, leaving him confused about why are you standing now.

"Get out of bed Mbappé, we should get dressed." you told him as a way to light up the mood again.

Later that day you were walking thru the city center of Paris hand in hand. Letting out small giggles as you both find entraining the fact that nobody noticed the two of you.

"Hey look there, do you see that hot guy?" you pointed to the flat screen TV in the storefront. Now playing some AD with Kylian in it. "He's everywhere, don't you think?" you laughed.

"It's because he's Paris." he looked deeply into your eyes.

"And Paris is him." you added to it.

"That's also the reason why you belong to Paris Y/n."

"What?" you didn't understand.

"You belong to Paris because Kylian Mbappé loves you so much Mon amour"

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Tag list: @nightlockcornucopia, @she-lives-in-her-dreams, @sorceresski @m4k444

#kylian x reader #kylian imagines #mbappe psg #mbappe imagine #light angst #pov #ethan mbappe #football imagine #kylian mbappe x reader #more then love

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ntls-24722 · 7 months

Text

I was thinking about @/artastic-friend's tags on my Comet post, and, first off thank you it was really sweet, but I had also realized that I wasn't even on tumblr to show the REEEAAALLY early designs of Comet, so here they are!

Comet had gone through a lot of changes, the most important one being... not looking exactly like DJMM! Comet originally looked exactly like DJMM since a good 80% of her body used to actually be mechanical, and her organism part was... very minimal and degenerate. But I very quickly found that lame - what's the pizzazz in being ~secretly a manmade organism~ if most of you is still mechanical anyway? I found an old picture of her transition from this (i apologize for the low quality, but much of the old sketches are super smudged n junk.) She still had motors and but much more of her internals filled up the plastic exoskeleton's empty space.

A detail i had actually forgotten now that I read back through old messages and pictures is that she used to be compatible with eating/drinking gasoline AND actual food? She had microbes that could eat it in her stomach and then she'd eat THOSE microbes like a cow??? that was kinda sick, past me, good job.

Comet's actual face being striped originated from her bony skeleton being full of bigbig holes (shown below, left) - they were meant to just be the frame for the plastic cover, but when the mechanical parts were taken out the holes condensed into stripes (shown below, right), partially being inspired from this Clownsuu post (AUGH ITS SO COOOOOL)

The 10 eyes thing stuck because it was like... representative of her kids' souls being infused with hers after she unknowingly ingested them after brain surgery?

She didn't like, pick them up and start chowing on her own children like you would with a bunch of dry cereal - in order to make the Comets less resource-needy the Oort Cloud would give some of the remnant they produced back to them? When Comet found out where it came from and where one of her missing kids went, she refused to eat or sleep at all until she almost died of exhaustion and finally went unconcious. The Oort Cloud took advantage of the fact she was finally not resisting and did the surgery as she slept. She didn't remember anything when she woke up and... ate for the first time in awhile not knowing what was in it, or that she even had kids in the first place.

Making the surgery easier is actually why the side of her head in this picture is exposed and Boneless (in some pictures there's actually huge stitches on there, too) but i realized that any behavioral disruptions would be directed to the frontal lobe, and that's why Modern comet actually has this little plate right between her eyes - that plate of exoskeleton is actually slightly loose and you can take it off n put it right back on for the least amount of scarring. It's also why Luz and Zoey don't have it.

For some reason I chose a marching band theme for her, maybe to cover up her skeleton-y Beneathness, and that is what made her into the star-spangled DJMM we know today. I chose a space-y theme since the Plex is.... somewhat space themed? Not entirely sure why but I'm glad I did it. She was intially accented with minty blue rather than the bold one she is now. This is where she also got her name, though it was initially "Comet Music Man."

She used to, temporarily, also have a 4 pairs of antennae coming from her wrists. I took it out cuz i couldn't find a reason for them

Comet wasn't based on any particular spider BUT there was the initial concept of having her be based off of the mirror spider and have a.... disco ball butt (you can kinda see it in the skeleton face pic) But in another universe, She could've been a spiny orb weaver, or a scorpion-tailed spider.

I did sometimes COMPLETELY go south with how her Beneath would look like in favor of a soft, fleshy interior, and I made...this! I hated it and I'm forever glad I didn't decide to go with this! jesus christ!

There were also the origins of the little harpoons - I had a headcanon that DJMM has little pedipalps on the inside of his mouth that looked like little STAFFbot hands and that got integrated with Comet, too

Alsoalso: the Neck

Couldn't figure out how to do it for a long time, since it's long and dragon-y and flexible and curvy, which is why half of it was exposed skin for awhile. In this outdated organ diagram i actually made the neck a bunch of layered "bowls" like one of those rainbow slug toys (not that you can.... see much of it lol) (also old sona jumpscare HOOH)

There's probably more considering Comet is now a year old and also her entire universe and story got REALLY derailed from a oneshot self-insert fic that i never even finished (the contents of which actually are why Comet and Fritz live where they are, in some abandoned factory - it was Fritz and DJMM's hideout) (also, Fritz predates Comet by a lot) because i thought WAYYYYY tooo hard about the implications of DJ Music Man, the giant spider, being alive

("what are you? are you a species or were you created? for what? By who? why are you pretending to be a robot? Are you pretending? What do you eat, and what's feeding you? Do you need to? Why do you have to be alive, and not an animatronic like everything else?) (also technically Bighand is just the alternate and anticlimatic version where he's just like "yeah I'm alive and I just work here") (both leave bc it sucks)

bonus patch notes that I couldn't cover:

neck became attached further up the head instead of below the jaw because keeping it the way it was was... not good

ALL of her became metallic-looking

She went from being a mirror spider to a sparklemuffin spider because of the coincidence that those spiders had the same yellow stripes from their eyes as she does.

The antennae became just 1 pair because the fact she had 2 pairs was also unnecessary

She used to have 2 little flesh strands from her top jaw and bottom jaw. They served no purpose only to get in the way of things so I got rid of them.

Her dewlap used to have music notes, stars, and lines

The tongue went from being thick n long to being flat and rounded. Fits in the mouth better

#ntls-24722 #djmm #dj music man #fnaf dj music man #fnaf djmm #djmm fnaf #dj music man fnaf #comet #fnaf au #security breach au #(almost) daily music man

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obsessedtomone · 9 months

Text

Unravel Yourself Before Me ⛓️ Chapter 6 - The Exposé▸Shigaraki x femReader

Chapter Summary:

◤“Are you serious right now? Me being scared shitless means I’m into him? Did you hit your head on the way here?” you ask, starting to feel actually annoyed.

“But it’s not just that and you know it!” They smack your arm, beautiful eyes boring into yours and peering at your soul.

Of course it isn’t just that, but you’d never admit you feel anything for this fucked-up asshole to anyone, let alone your own damn self. ◢ Setting: University AU - No quirks (unless degenerate personalities count) Tags: Slow burn, Eventual Smut, Unhealthy/Toxic Relationships, Humiliation, Mentally Ill Reader, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to ??? Warning: Dead Dove – Do Not Eat | Mind the tags TW: Implied Su/Self H, Dubcon, Reader has a super shitty past like actually, Shigaraki Tomura is his own warning.

AO3 Crosspost | Chain Divider by firefly-graphics

Chapters: One • Two • Three • Four • Five • Six • Seven

Chapter 6 - The Exposé

All the noise, the chatter, the people—they drown out the silence as you sit like a loser in the corner of the busy shop, waiting.

With your leg bouncing—one of your many nervous tics—you cast an anxious look around you, unable to shake the feeling that everyone is watching you, even off campus. You’re hiding behind the safety of your hood, blankly seeing people going about their day, while you were waiting for Taylor to show.

“Girl, if we’re going to discuss fucked-up shit again, I really need something to sweeten it up” is what they told you over the phone, after your little mental breakdown in the hallway.

So they picked their favorite—and unfortunately a really fucking popular—bubble tea store in the area, for the both of you to have a talk in.

You’re torn between periodically checking your watch, your phone, or your surroundings, visibly on edge as you alternate doing so.

Conjuring whatever your therapist—or reddit post—told you to do when you’re having a huge panic attack and you’re not home, you begin taking deep breaths. You focus on the things around you first, the different smells, the people. The wallpaper that's slightly torn, in the corner where you’re sitting.

You look around, try your goddamn best, and unsurprisingly—it doesn’t fucking work.

It doesn’t, because save for your three different types of anxiety medication you take every day, nothing fucking works. You stopped taking heavy meds after you figured the worst of everything had passed, after life finally became somewhat stable, somewhat bearable.

So instead, you ride that nauseating wave of anxiety pulsating within you, and wait as patiently as you fucking can for it to just stop.

Shigaraki managed to do a number on you today, because you made sure you took off as soon as he’d left, not having the stomach to bump into more horny, borderline assailant creepy jocks anymore.

It was more than enough that your phone was blowing up with an incredibly stupid amount of assholes, messaging you, harassing you at regular intervals, and sending you enough dick pics to last you a lifetime. All in the span of a single fucking day.

You wanted to turn your phone off, but unfortunately, it was also the only way to contact Taylor outside the comfort of your PC, so you ended up just muting it, turning the notifications off and sucking it the fuck up until you got home today.

Your friend still had classes that they were eager to skip, in order to hurry and meet with you, but you managed to convince them to stay by compromising—hence your sitting down in an overrated bubble tea store, right in the middle of a crisis.

With a sigh, you sip on your plain black coffee, scrolling through social media and passing as much time as you can before you even have to think about dealing with him. Luckily, it didn’t take more than an hour, and the movement you see from the corner of your eye is a familiar one.

Taylor is dressed up in a slutty black mesh crop-top and a high-waisted pair of black leggings. A few flashy accessories and a pair of sunglasses sitting snug on top of their head, are complementing their skimpy club outfit nicely.

“You do realize winter starts in like a month, slut?” you ask, a knowing smile playing on your lips, pure relief coating your gaze at the sight of them before you.

You’re not alone, you’re not alone, you’re not alone.

Not this time.

“Oh yeah? Well how about—you shut the fuck up? It’s fucking winter all year ‘round for you, bitch!” They smile back at you, but a thought seems to cross their mind and their expression slips back into one of concern. “Are you doing okay, babe?”

“I’ll manage. Do you wanna order now, or?”

“It’s fiiine, I can always steal from yours and order later.” They wink at you, yoinking your drink before your very eyes, and you watch in horror as a major crime is about to unfold, right in front of you.

“Hold! Dude, it’s—”

“Eeww! Gross! How can you even drink this shit?!” Your friend basically throws the drink back at you, splashing some on the table and immediately getting back up to order.

You look at them through half-lidded eyes and speak in a bored tone, “If you would’ve asked first, I could have told you what it was.”

Taylor shows you the bird, mouths a ‘fuck yourself’ and makes their way to the counter to order. “Aaand we don’t know what he’s talking about? Like, at all?” they say, sipping on their milk caramel white tea diabetes and asks you.

“Nooo fucking clue. He kept talking like a goddamn psycho about this ‘pReSeNT’—” you reply, doing air quotes and mocking his stupid fucking voice, “—he’s got for me. I don’t know where, or what it is. Half expecting to find a dead body in front of my place today, tbh.”

“Hmm, guess we’ll have to wait and find out. Sucks, but there’s not much we can do, babe.”

Then, your friend starts eyeing you curiously, seemingly weighing something in their mind. You roll your eyes.

“Shoot. You’re not done.”

As if possessed, Taylor instantly lights up and throws a series of incredibly inadequate questions at you.

“Okay, okay, so—what did he smell like? Everyone says he looks like he doesn’t shower, and wears the same clothes all the time! Is it true? I’ve only seen him from a distance. And, and, oh! Do you think he’s interested in you? There’s no way he’s not, right? I mean he was fucking with you, but I’ve never heard of him interacting with anyone like that—getting all close and personaaal, pinning them to the freaking wall! Two times?! C’mon!” They go off, giggling, as if Shigaraki was truly just a misunderstood guy, a hopeless romantic, and not a rich psychopath who gets off on breaking people's bones and making girls cry.

If your friend notices the blatant shock on your face, they don’t react to it.

“So, I have a theory, okaaay? I think… that he kind of likes you? I mean I heard he’s beaten the shit out of female students before, for literally less than the shit you pulled, so he’s definitely cutting you slack. Oh, right! How come you didn’t pepper spray his ass? You never hesitated before.” A snicker escapes them when they can’t help but imagine it. “Bet it would’ve been so fucking funny to blind Shigaraki Tomura! He’d literally fucking kill you. Gasp! Do you think he’d screech?!”

You sigh, shaking your head and looking out of the window. “I fucking can’t with you.”

“Well?” They cast an expectant glance in your direction, waiting for you to respond until a frustrated exhale escapes your lips.

“Fuck, okay. You’re lucky I’m short on friends,” you say, as if you had any friends at all, and your gaze turns into a playfully irritated one, making them wiggle their perfectly-shaped tattooed eyebrows at you. “First of all, you have to stop humanizing him. He’s literally just a psycho.”

“A psycho you’re into,” they shamelessly add, batting their fake eyelashes innocently. You blink at them, taken aback by their audacity. “C’moon, all these years I’ve known you and this guy is the first who’s doing a number on you? Just look at you! You’re not acting like yourself! Be fucking for real, girl.”

“Are you serious right now? Me being scared shitless means I’m into him? Did you hit your head on the way here?” you ask, starting to feel actually annoyed.

“But it’s not just that and you know it!” They smack your arm, beautiful eyes boring into yours and peering at your soul.

Of course it isn’t just that, but you’d never admit you feel anything for this fucked-up asshole to anyone, let alone your own damn self.

“Listen, you can lie to yourself as much as you want, babe, but I’ve been around for way too fucking long for you to be able to hide that shit from me. Just sayin’.”

You roll your eyes and click your tongue.

“Whatever, you asshole.”

Taking a sip of your bitter drink, you start mentally preparing yourself to entertain your crazy bitch of a friend. They nod excitedly, waiting for you to continue.

It’s like they completely forgot the entire reason you’re here right now, but you brush it off because this is nothing new to you. You’ve known them long enough to know that, despite their perfect popular appearance, they still have flaws. Major flaws. And frankly it didn’t bother you.

“Dunno. I don’t think he doesn’t shower—and who the fuck cares if he wears the same clothes everyday? I do too? Are people seriously that fucking shallow?” you ask, brow furrowing at the nasty shit that Taylor and their peers seem to talk behind his back. “He smells fine. No B.O, just cigs and uh… cologne, maybe.”

You leave out the part where you don’t think you’ve smelled any sort of perfume on him before today, looking warily at your friend, who’s toying with the rim of their cup, using the tips of their forty dollar acrylic nails.

“And how the fuck should I know if he’s into me? He’s fucking weird all the time. His eyes are—when he looks at me… I don’t know. It’s intense. Like that bastard already knows everything about you and still expects you to disappoint him in some way. It’s really fucking weird, I’ve never met anyone like that before, so he is special, alright,” you scoff before continuing, “Also, kind of fucked that you believe some rumors and parrot the same shit your friends say. You literally said you don’t know him personally, and I bet none of your fake ass friends know him either.”

You shouldn’t defend him. You know you shouldn’t defend him, but you can’t fucking help it when you’ve been through the same shit your whole life. People just like to say things, and maybe some of the things they’ve said are true, but—

“What? Bitch I literally know someone who just looked at him wrong, and came back the next day with a broken arm and his dad losing his job. Don’t give me that.”

“Oh? Looked at him wrong, huh? He for sure didn’t say he looked weird, called his outfit shit, or made fun of his scars and skin problems, right? No way he’d said something disrespectful to his face, like the fact that he maybe doesn’t shower. The fuck you on? I’ve seen the way people look at him at school.”

Taylor narrows their eyes at you, scoffs and looks away.

A pang of anxiety replaces your irritation and you’re about to try to smooth things over, when they finally reply.

“Okay, fine. The guy thought it would be funny to steal his watch and prove he can get away with it. He lied to us too, by the way. But it’s not like he didn’t fuck with you too! He’s literally pushed you and invaded your privacy, threatened you and acted like a creep! And god knows what he was referring to earlier!” They fold their arms defensively.

Your friend is right, he does seem like an unpredictable individual, and you shouldn’t defend him over them. After all, you still haven’t told them about the ugly bruises.

“Sorry,” they begin, a remorseful look on their face and your eyes widened. “I shouldn’t have said all that. I know people acted like shit around you too in highschool. Still think that you should be careful, though. He’s violent and scary and I know I was messing around earlier, saying he’s interested in you, but I said that because no one has seen him with anyone on campus. Not unless they got into a fight. He’s acting super weird around you.”

You glance at the (now cold) drink in your hands and your shoulders slump forward. “It’s fine. I’m… sensitive because he’s scared me, and it pisses me off how weak I am. I thought I got over most of my mommy and daddy issues, but it only took a bigger asshole to bring them out of me again.”

Honestly, you wish you had the courage to beat his ass even if it meant he’d be beating yours in return. That way it would at least feel like you’ve tried.

“Honey, no. No, no, no. You’re not weak.” Taylor replies, your eyes becoming wet as they take your hands in theirs and their soft voice melts your heart. “You’re like, the strongest bitch that I know.”

“Shut up.” You look away, frowning with a blurry vision, as your tears threaten to spill over.

They squeeze your hands softly, expression full of understanding. “I’m serious. We’ll figure this whole thing out, okay? Sorry for being nosey, that was really fucked of me.”

“It’s fine, that’s not the issue. I’m just really tired, I think.”

It’s definitely not fine, but you know they mean well.

Your thoughts were running at a hundred miles per hour now, exhaustion catching up with your foggy brain.

─────────

Click —

You unlock the door to your apartment and look around to see if anything’s out of place. Maybe even for a dead body that wasn’t so out of the question anymore.

You double and triple check, going into every room two or three times. Everything’s where it’s supposed to be, and no one seems to have broken into your apartment yet.

If you somehow went back to the version you were this morning, you’d find the way you act right now to be kind of silly.

You were not, though, not anymore, and you know better now. After a well deserved warm shower, you sit down on your cheap thirty-dollar IKEA chair and boot your PC up. You decide that for the next few hours, gaming will be your best coping mechanism for all the stress you’ve gone through today, while you sit around, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You only manage to get through a couple of hours though, watching the timer of your League queue go up when your phone goes off. After pushing one side of your headset off of your right ear, you pick up.

“Yeah? I thought I saw you like five minutes ago, did you really miss me that much?” you joke, but it falls super flat when you hear Taylor exhale your name shakily.

Alarms were suddenly going off in your head.

“What? What’s wrong? Are you okay?!”

Did he do something to them?!

“H-Hey, um. C-Can you check—S-Sorry, it’s really hard to speak right now,” they choke up.

Your own voice starts shaking and you frown at your white walls. “That’s okay, it’s okay. T-Take your time, I’m here. I’m listening. Should I come over?”

“N-No, hold on. Okay.” They take a deep breath before going on, “Do you remember t-that social media platform for college kids in our city? The popular one. T-The one where I hooked up with that douchebag who asked me to peg him, five minutes into our date?” Taylor took a pause and sniffled. “You didn’t wanna make an account because it was ‘normie shit’ and ‘a waste of time’, r-remember?”

“Yes? Taylor, what the fuck’s happening? Get to the point, please.”

“W-Well, I’ll send you my login info now, and you can c-check it yourself, hold on.”

You hear plastic nails tapping in quick succession on what you assumed was the screen of their phone.

“Can you tell me alread—”

“Hold on! Y-You have to see this, I—I really can’t,” they say, sniffling again and your brows pinching even more.

While waiting, your leg once again starts bouncing anxiously and your phone finally gets pinged. You put your friend on speaker, quickly typing in the address and login on your PC.

“So? What am I supposed to see?”

“J-Just keep scrolling, you’ll find it. I’m so fucking sorry, honey. We’ll go to the dean’s office, or the police… w-we’ll—fuck—we’ll get this sorted out, okay?” your friend attempts to reassure you, but they sounded like they needed it more right now.

You scroll for a while, still having no clue about what you’re supposed to find, listening to Taylor mumble some more and scrolling through random post after random post of annoying frat guys your friend follows, exes, friends, etcetera.

“I still don’t know what I’m supposed to—”

Until your eyes zone in on it, your first and last name displayed at the top of the post. [ Hiiii everyone!!! I’m the hot emo chick in your computer science class at Weston NexTech! ]

* Click Image Attachment

You swallow emptily, clicking on the first attachment.

Dread fills your lungs and suddenly—you’re unable to breathe.

What greets you is your barely legal self. Staring back at you.

It’s a selfie—your selfie—arm hooked under one of your legs, and pulling it upwards, while you use your other to raise the strap of your thong, teasing the viewer… your ‘boyfriend’ at the time.

It all clicks at once and you immediately understand what this is—

Revenge porn.

[ So, I bet that got your attention, right? Hehe! You better read closely now!

I’m making a post here because I’m suuuuper fucking bored,

and I was hoping you guys could cheer me up! :3 ]

* Click Image Attachment

“Babe? Y-You okay?”

“Hold on,” you reply snappily, feeling the tips of your digits turning painfully cold.

Your bare ass is on display in the second image, bent over the bed and looking back at the camera. Your stomach twists with heavy nausea.

You remember these pictures.

[ I’ve never done this before, but I looove attention <3 and

since you guys have got nothing to lose, we should all play

a game, okay?! Yaay!

I’ve always been shy and I thought it

would be fun to get to know everyone before

I graduate, so this little honor student

is going to cut you a deal, yeah? ]

* Click Image Attachment

You thought that maybe Taylor hung up on you, but in reality you just stopped being able to hear anything.

With your heart pounding wildly, you glance at the engagement and notice there are about two thousand people who’d liked the fucking thread.

Two whole thousands, and the thread doesn’t even fucking end there.

[ At the bottom of the thread you can find my email

and phone number! :D

And who knows, if it’s going really well, maybe I’ll even invite you over to my place!!!

Or depending on how this goes, I could share my

address with everyone! Wouldn’t that be fun? ]

* Click Image Attachment

Suddenly, a lot of today’s events start making sense to you.

The random phone calls, the spam emails, the people looking at you funny and jocks almost sexually assaulting you on the way to class.

[ You better hurry now, before it’s too late

and I change my mind! Hehe!

I’ll be posting new clips every Tuesday, at 11 PM,

make sure to watch them all!

So please, please, please! Text me, call me, or

hit me up IRL! I’d like to get to know as many of you hotties as I can <3

Keep in mind that I’m shy and I like assertive guys,

so don’t worry if I say no! I really, really like rough roleplay

as you can see below!

Till next Tuesday and thank you for the likes!!! <3 ]

* Play video

You must’ve shifted realities, because your body stopped feeling like your own.

Why were you here again?

Ah, because you decided to cut Shigaraki out of your project.

Or maybe because he’d asked to play with you and you were too stunned to respond to him.

Would you have played with him if the stun wore off that time, if he’d asked again? Probably not.

So then, you’re here because the two of you met at the convenience store, way back.

What had you said to him that day? Couldn’t you have just gotten out of the way like a normal human being? But he wasn’t mad the next day when he’d met you in class.

That means you must have fucked up badly, multiple times, right?

This is your fault. It’s always your fault.

But there’s no time for that, because you partially tune into reality again, and now you can hear Taylor crying softly on the speaker of your phone.

With a shaky grip on your mouse, you press play on the clip and the first noise you hear is your dealer fumbling with the camera, trying to set it up.

It’s been years.

This was a different time of your life, one that you’d like so desperately to erase from your brain, from your history.

You were high, and not on life, no.

You’re high on something crazy, like heroin. It was one of the first videos too, you remember. You can tell by the amount of scars and bruises you can see on yourself. And you’d let your dealer… your sort-of-ex, take pictures of your body as another form of payment, after sexual favors became too boring for him.

But it didn’t stop at that.

No, that was only the start. He’d started recording videos of the two of you fucking—really low quality amateur pornos—and then, as the months passed, he’d realized he could talk you into trying pretty much anything if he dangled the right prizes in front of your eyes.

You were way younger, really fucking stupid, always under the influence, with no safety-net and constantly daring life over and over to really mess you up. It meant you didn’t give a fuck about your situation, of some insignificant videos or pictures… at least at first.

If anything you used to like the attention from him.

From anyone.

But that all had changed, once you started cleaning up your act, once you were able to become confident again. You made him delete all of them, you really did, but the bastard must have had backups, something that did cross your mind at the time, but you thought—hoped—that he at least wouldn’t share them with anyone. He was a coward and a criminal after all. One that you had a lot of dirt on, in case he decided to fuck you over.

It should’ve been fine, you should’ve been safe.

Unless someone like Shigaraki managed to get a hold of him, threatening or paying him off to get what he wanted. Yeah, that must’ve been it.

But you haven’t gotten the slightest clue as to how he put two and two together to find your ex. You’d almost completely changed your identity since.

However, that must not matter for someone of Shigaraki’s caliber, because you’re now staring at the evidence that more than half of your university has had access to.

“Taylor,” you say in a monotone voice, a quiet tear escaping you.

“Y-Yes? Hun, I’m s-sorry. I’m r-really so-rry.”

Pain thrums through your cells and your chest hurts. You don’t know how to comfort them.

You don’t know how to comfort your fucking self.

“It’s… not the full video. He’s—he’s splitting it into parts. He’s planning to fuck with me by posting them week by week before class, so that he’ll be able to gauge my reaction. Like an actual psychopath.”

Your eyes glide over the thread quickly once more. Then, again. Reading it over and over.

Ah, he’s insane. Completely, utterly, off-his-fucking-medication insane.

You thought maybe your stupid fucking brain was playing tricks on you but no.

He’d left you a message. In the thread.

He’d actually left you a message.

You open notepad on your PC and write it down, side by side.

[ I bet that got your attention, right?—You better read closely now—I have got nothing to lose—We should play a game—I’m going to cut you a deal—It’s over—Depending on how this goes—I’ll share your address with everyone—You better hurry now, before it’s too late and I change my mind ]

You lose. Game over

Taylor is calling your name. You blink. Twice.

“W-We can go to the dean, right? T-They should understand. W-We’ll go together and—”

“No,” you interrupt, a feeling of numbness washing over you. “I’m not sure they’ll believe me. Plus his dad’s a big shot.”

“Please, we can—we can go to the police! He—He can’t get away with this!”

“It’s fine. I’m hanging up, okay? I’ll try calling him and if that doesn’t work then… I don’t know. I’ll just try calling him.”

“What? No! Don’t! We need the police—please, please, let’s go to the police!”

“You know I can’t do that, Tay. I’ll talk to you later. It’ll be fine,” you lie, cutting them off and hanging up.

Your hands are shaking, as you stare at his name in your contacts list.

‘You lose’ he’d said. ‘Game over’

It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay, you chant in your head. You’ll be okay, you’ve been through worse, you’ll be okay.

Ring.

Ring—

“Yeah?” a hoarse voice replies with a curse under his breath, seemingly distracted, as sounds of a mechanical keyboard bleed through the phone speakers and up against your ear.

“It’s… It’s me.”

Then there was silence.

Until you hear a strange sound. It takes you a good second to realize that he’s fucking giggling.

“Uh-huuuh. What did you want? I’m busy,” he says while your hearing attunes to him mashing his keyboard louder.

You take a deep breath. “Take it down.”

“Hmmm? Take what down? You should be more specific, I’m not really following.” Shigaraki smiles and you could fucking hear it in his voice.

Your eyes screw shut, anger already bubbling within yourself. “You know what I mean, stop playing dumb. Take. It. Down.”

“Aaah, I don’t have time to play games with you, so either get to the point or—”

“What do you want, Shigaraki? Hm?” you growl, quickly losing your patience. “Do you want me to blow you? Sleep with you? What do you want from me?”

“Whoaaaa, what the hell? Chill! Do I look like some desperate fucking loser to you?” he says it, like he doesn't know. “Only idiots would think to fuck ugly bimbos like you, and it seems like you’re pretty much used goods at this point anyways, haha. Honestly, who’d fuck you at all ever again? I’ve seen all the shit your ex did—” He inhales sharply, key taps becoming frantic on the other side of the line. “Fuck! They’re on B, planting! Spinner, fucking TP there, stop wasting time, FUCK! HEY! Do you want to win, or what? Oh, you do? Then fucking LISTEN to me.”

After a long second of him huffing and puffing in your ear, it finally clicks in your brain.

Shigaraki is gaming, playing with his buddies, relaxing while you feel like your life is falling apart for the 1000th time this month.

“Okay,” you finally say.

“Okay? Okay, what?” he scoffs. “You know, you should try a little harder, moron. I told you what to do before, if you want me to help you.” Shigaraki pauses, focusing on his game for another moment. You watch your animated wallpaper turn into a dark screen due to your inactivity—until he snorts. “Yeah, maybe you do enjoy this kind of thing, after all. I wouldn’t really put it past you. After seeing those vids, boy, gotta admit.” He whistles and his mic peaks. “Didn’t think you were the type! Ahh, does the faculty even know? I wonder how they’d react, knowing their adorable little honors student was spending her free time fucking low-level druglords, getting high and recording shitty rape-porn!”

“What I do with my life, in private, is none of your fucking business!” you yell into your phone. “Do you even know how old I was in those? What I fucking went through? Did you not fucking see? Yet you still decide you wanna go ahead and dox me?” you ask desperately, voice cracking multiple times. “What kind of monster are you? How low can you fucking stoop, like actually?”

What were you trying to do? Appeal to his humanity? Does a guy like this even feel empathy? The last few ones in your life didn’t, and they were all really fucked up too. What’s the chance he’d listen? Probably none, but what’s the point in holding back anyways?

“Damn, don’t get emotional, man. Not my fuckin’ problem you let your shitty ass boyfriends fuck you up like that—Fuck, shut up! Wasn’t talking to you, idiot. Yeah, I’m in a call, focus on the fucking game!” he yells at his friends before continuing, “Listen, got anything else to say besides bitching and whining at me? Last I recall, I gave you two fucking options, and so far you’ve chosen to ignore both. So explain to me why I should do anything for you, hm? Make it count, too, ‘cos I’m really tired of hearing you cry in my fuckin’ ears.”

Wow—he was just… wow.

“I’m sorry,” you say honestly, breaking that apology record after all.

“Mm? Come again? Couldn’t hear ya.”

Tomura smiles expectantly.

At last, the breaking point. He’d hoped that ideally, it would’ve happened in class, with you kneeling before him in front of all NPCs to see, but this was okay too. He’s going to cut you a little more slack, you didn’t know who you were dealing with, after all.

See? He can be merciful as well.

Your jaw tightens, eyes becoming glassy with wet sadness for the nth time today.

“I’m fucking sorry, o-okay?”

The weight comes crashing on you all at once, and you finally break down crying in front of the devil himself.

You hear him saying ‘BRB’ and after some shuffling, the line becomes completely silent, save for your pathetic sobs.

Is he just listening to you suffer? Was he that fucking cruel?

“I-I’m sorry for being such a—such a bitch to you in the store—f-for talking to you in class and g-getting you in trouble with the professor. I-I’m really fucking sorry. I didn’t know better,” you sob. “I shouldn’t have—shouldn't have talked out of turn, shouldn’t have upset you—” Your voice cracks and you choke, “I-I wish I’d never talked to you. I was stupid. R-Really, really stupid to cross you. Will you please, please take the thread down? I’ll make sure I’ve learned m-my place. I won't bother you again.”

You sound so pathetic even to your own ears, as you descend into the beginnings of a panic attack. It’s over. It’s all over. Your life is going to be destroyed after this. You’ll lose your scholarship, Taylor will leave you and you’ll finally buy that rope and fucking hang—

He should be feeling thrilled, ecstatic even, now that he’s finally gotten to crush you.

You, with your filthy fucking mouth, always cursing at him, always talking shit and trying to piss him off. You, who are like everyone else in this world, who’ll sneer and think you’re better than him. He’s put you in your place where you belong, like everyone else who tries to fuck with him.

Held back, even.

That’s right, he’s holding back right now. He’s given you a choice and you finally used that stupid brain of yours to take it.

He should be feeling on top of the world, but instead he feels something twisting within him, hearing the broken desperation in your voice.

Ahhh. Anger. He’s feeling anger.

You wished you’d never talked to him? To never bother him again?

Shouldn’t you wish to be nicer? For him to forgive you? For him to like you?

The fuck kind of apology was this? Why were you so fucking clueless?

“That all?” he replies to your sobs, bored and indifferent.

“What?” you whisper.

“Is that fucking all, I asked. Are you fuckin’ deaf now or something?” He raises his voice at you and you flinch.

“I-I don’t u-understand, I’m being genuinely—”

“I DoN’t unDerStaAanD! Fucking—cry more, bitch,” Shigaraki mocks you. “You’re wasting my fucking time, so if that’s all you have to say, I’m hanging up.”

Fuck, he’s let himself become defensive. He’s being irrationally angry right now, losing his cool.

This hurt feels new to him, and he’s only ever felt it around you. That’s right, it’s your fault.

It’s your fault you disrespected him when he’d asked to play with you. It’s your fault you thought you could get away with getting him in trouble, it’s your fault he’s feeling this way right now.

It’s your fucking fault, and he’s angry, so very angry that someone like you is able to get to him, to hurt—

You feel your knuckles turning white from the pressure of your fingertips against the plastic case of your phone.

“Can you stop being a fucking child f-for one f-fucking second, and talk to me so I can understand?!”

“There’s nothing for you to understand. You’re fucking retarded, and I’m gonna make sure you can’t set a single fucking foot outside your house, without feeling scared that rapists and stalkers are camping next to your door. Stupid bitch, maybe I’ll post the entire fucking thing today, give ‘em your address and get it over with,” he grunts, voice low and cold. “I lost the game too, ‘cos of your sorry ass.”

“—really fucking hate you, Shigaraki! But you’re used to people feeling like that about you, aren’t you? Fucking with my life—with people’s lives like you’re some—what? Some god?” you spit, abandoning all your reasoning.

If he’s going to destroy your life too, might as well go down with a fight, right?

“You’re not, though,” you laugh bitterly, million thoughts racing through your head and you feel like your brain is gonna split. “You’re really not. You’re just a… you’re just a pathetic unoriginal asshole, and I can’t fucking believe how stupid I was to let myself—to ever think—to stoop so low and fucking feel like you’re—to fucking like someone like y—”

There’s silence.

And then you hear Shigaraki inhale softly.

Blood drains from your face.

Were you just about to… were you confessing to him?

Stupid, stupid, fucking stupid.

Your thumb hovers over the ‘end call’ button. Fuck this.

“What? What did you—what were you saying?”

“Fuck off,” you whisper, shoulders slumping.

“HEY! Repeat? What did you say? You can’t believe you what?” His voice is eager as he presses you, but you’re already checked out of the conversation.

“I said, go fuck yourself asshole. Pray I kill myself before I have to see you again.”

“If you fucking dare to hang up now, I swear to fucking GOD,” he yells, volume peaking again and you just end the call, turning your phone off and slumping in your chair.

Then, you giggle deliriously at the memory of you defending him a few hours ago.

What were you even saying? Ahh, right! ‘Don’t pick on him because of silly rumors. Don’t say stupid shit if you don’t know him!’

You’re so fucking stupid. Why the fuck did you friendly fire at your best friend of all people? They were right. He’s just a piece of shit. You’d even cried in front of him, begging him to stop. You’d fucking apologized.

Pathetic. That’s all you are. Fucking pathetic.

“Fuck this whole world, honestly,” you whisper to yourself.

Getting up, you grab your phone and use all your force to throw it across the room, hearing it smash against the wall and then fall to the floor. You hope it splintered and broke, the way you feel like your life has.

#shigaraki x reader #shigaraki x y/n #emotional hurt/comfort #shigaraki tomura #unhealthy relationships #dead dove do not eat #trigger warnings #shigaraki tomura x reader #shigaraki fanfiction #shigaraki x you #tenko shimura #tomura shigaraki #college au #reader is female

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baronessblixen · 10 months

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Christmas Cookies For The Soul

Day five: homemade goodies

I'm doing the 24 Days of X-Mas Files Challenge that msrafterdark posted!

Summary: When Mulder doesn't answer his phone, all Scully can do is show up at his apartment to find out what's going on. (season 2, developing relationship/friendship, hurt/comfort; wc: 910)

Tagging @today-in-fic

If Mulder had picked up his phone, she wouldn’t have felt the need to show up at his place. She hasn’t heard from him in over 24 hours and as much as she tries to remind herself that he’s a grown man, she can’t help but be curious. She’s not worried. Or maybe she is a little bit.

He said he doesn’t have plans for Christmas and she almost invited him to her mother’s. Then she changed her mind. It’s not that she doesn’t like the idea of spending Christmas with Mulder. But this is their first year without Ahab. Both her brothers will be there, and Missy.

None of them are saying it, but Scully knows they’re all going to be there because she almost wasn’t. Her abduction is a sore topic for everyone and they avoid it at all costs. Having Mulder there would make things more complicated.

It takes Mulder so long to open the door that for a moment she wonders if he’s even home. When his head peeks through, his eyes look small and his nose is slightly swollen and red. She immediately changes into doctor’s mode, all her alarm clocks going off.

“Mulder, are you okay?”

“What are you doing here?” His voice sounds sleepy and nasal. “I thought you were spending Christmas at your mother’s.”

“I am,” she says. “You didn’t answer your phone and I- I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas before I left. I haven’t heard from you in over a day.” Now that the words are out, she realizes how ridiculous they sound. Ever since her abduction, they’ve talked almost daily. Whether during the week or on the rare weekends that they don't have a case. Not hearing from Mulder is never a good sign. Seeing him like this only proves it.

“I’m fine,” he says, but doesn’t sound like it at all. “Thank you for checking on me.”

“Do you have everything you need?” She glances past him but the apartment is dark. He was probably sleeping – or trying to – when she knocked on his door. “I still have some time. I could get you-” He laughs softly and then smiles, disarming her.

“I have everything I need, Doc.”

“Are you sure? You still have the Tylenol I gave you the other day, right? Tea, Mulder? You need to drink lots of fluids. You know, maybe I should call my mother and call this whole thing off.”

“Scully, I appreciate your concern, and I consider you a brilliant doctor, but even you can’t cure the common cold. Now go, before you catch it, too.” She knows he’s right but that doesn’t make leaving him any easier.

“I’ll call you,” she warns him. “Every day. Okay?” He laughs again and it turns into a coughing fit. Scully pats his back gently and once he’s calmed down, presses the back of her hand against his forehead. Way too warm for her liking. “You get some rest, all right? And answer your phone or I’ll show up here again.”

“Got it, Doc.”

There’s nothing more to say or do, and yet, she’s standing there, staring at him. Can she really leave him like this? What would her mother do? That’s when she remembers the sugar cookies she made that are waiting in the car. All four kids were told to bring a dessert and Scully had decided to make her grandmother’s famous sugar cookies. She’ll have to show up empty-handed but her decision is made.

“I have something for you,” she says, smiling at him. “I’ll be right back.”

“I’m not leaving.” She feels Mulder watch her as she hurries down the stairs to her car, unwilling to wait for the elevator. The cookies are in the trunk, in a box her mother lent her ages ago that she meant to return tonight. Knowing how much her mother likes Mulder, she thinks she’ll understand. When she returns, Mulder is still in the exact same place she left him.

“Here,” she says, handing him the box. “These are for you.” Mulder opens it and lifts her eyes to hers. She can’t tell if he’s touched by her gesture or if his eyes are glassy from his fever.

“Thank you, Scully. They look delicious.”

“I made them last night,” she explains. “It’s my grandmother’s recipe. We always fought over who got to lick the dough when she made them. Then we fought over who got to try the first, warm cookie.” She shakes her head, trying not to lose herself in the memory.

“Let me guess: you won.”

“Sometimes,” she says with a smile. “I hope you like them. Merry Christmas, Mulder.”

“I know I’ll love them.” He picks out a heart-shaped sugar cookie and stuffs it into his mouth. “I was right,” he says with his mouth full. “Tell your mom hi from me, okay?”

“I will. And you answer your phone.” It’s an order and he nods. “You’ll be fine?” She just has to ask him one more time.

“I’ll be fine. I have these cookies to keep me company. Now go. I don’t want you to catch this cold and miss out on Christmas.”

She considers hugging him but decides against it. Instead, she gives him a small nod and he smiles at her in return. As she leaves, feeling his eyes on her back, she realizes she’ll miss him. That’s something she’ll have to think about another day.

#ficmas2023 #mulder got to be sick today cause i am too #not as fluffy as previous stories #msr #xf fanfic #my writing #my fic

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lisbeth-kk · 1 year

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Continuing the May prompts with a letter story. Thanks for the tag @calaisreno

Healing letters

After grieving Sherlock for months, John decides to write down his feelings, just like his therapist, Ella, advised him to. First he tries to actually write. Physically. It’s too strenuous. He’s not used to writing by hand anymore. Besides the pages more often than not, gets soaked from his dripping tears, and the ink gets smeared all over the paper.

He'll use the blog, but he’ll disable comments. Although he does it for his own sanity, it may help the few friends he’s got to understand what he’s going through. He hasn’t exactly been socialising since Sherlock jumped off that roof, and he rarely answers his phone.

He wants it to be a system to this. Each blog post will have its own topic. If not, John’s confident it’ll be just him babbling, not even making sense to himself. Today he feels a bit less depressed, and he can start with the anger.

I’m so angry with you, Sherlock. How could you kill yourself in front of me? Making me witness my best friend jump off a building to his death. Did you think I wouldn’t mind? That I wouldn’t grieve you just because I was pissed with you when I left you? You, the most observant man who’s ever walked the earth. How could you not know, you meant the world to me? What do you think it was like talking to you when you stood up there? I heard the tears in your voice, and you must’ve heard my despair as well. When I saw you lying at the pavement, my life ended too, you know. My whole world shattered. You were taken away before I could say a proper goodbye. How do you think that made me feel, Sherlock? Damn, you!

John’s mentally exhausted after posting the entry. He’s shaking with anger against Sherlock. Without giving it a second thought, he grabs his jacket and heads out to get some air. He walks quickly wherever his feet carries him. He doesn’t care much, and he must look quite intimidating, because other pedestrians are clearly avoiding him.

He makes tea and toast when he gets back. The anger has dissipated a bit. It’s actually liberating to feel something again. For weeks he’s just been numb. Haven’t cared about anything. He startles when his phone buzzes. A text from Molly. He deletes it without looking. She has most likely read the blog entry and wants to comfort him or something. Mike and Greg texts him a few hours later. John deletes those texts too.

***

A few days later the anger is long gone. Another feeling has emerged in his mind the last couple of hours. His faith in Sherlock. It’s always been there, but never as strong as it is now. Curious, that.

From the first day I met you, I had faith in you, Sherlock. That drug bust at 221B told you that much. Perhaps I put you on a pedestal for a while, come to think of it. Nevertheless, despite all your odd habits, sulks and annoying behaviour, I always believed in who you were. The core of you. Not to flatter myself, but I think I knew you quite well. Perhaps not as well as Mycroft, although he once said that I knew you best of all. All that’s been said about you after you died, makes me believe in you even more. Because I know, Sherlock, that you never were a fraud. You may have shammed and tricked people for a case, but you were never a fake. To the day I die myself, I’ll deny that with everything I’ve got.

Again, John’s mentally exhausted after posting the new entry, but in another sort of way. The adrenaline doesn’t zing through his veins. It’s more like he’s poured out his soul. And in a way he has. He’s never uttered those words to anyone.

Before the day is over, his phone buzzes with texts from Molly, Greg and Mike. He deletes all of them without reading. This quest is something he wants to execute without input from anyone.

***

A week passes without the urge to write. When the familiar nightmare appears one night, John knows it’s time for another blog post. He had waked screaming Sherlock’s name, seeing him fall from that roof again. His heart pounded like he’d run a marathon and his face was wet from crying, sobbing really.

How did I fail to see that something was amiss, Sherlock? I loathe myself for not observing you more thoroughly. Moriarty clouded my vision. You were so absorbed in his endeavours to get your attention. Flattered maybe, that another genius wanted to play with you. I should’ve seen that his only goal was to destroy you. He said so the first time. At the pool. “I’ll burn the heart out of you.” Whatever he meant by that. He certainly burned the heart out of me, if he had anything to do with your suicide. It must’ve been that. You would never do what you did unless you had no other choice. Am I right, Sherlock? I think I am, which makes it even harder to bear. The thought that if I’d been just a little bit smarter, more alert, less stubborn and angry with you....I might’ve saved you.

John shuts his phone off and drinks half a bottle of whisky after posting that entry, or letter as he’s started to call them.

***

This will be his last letter. John knows that this also will be the hardest one, and maybe it’ll be the one that starts his healing properly. His grief’s still raw. Some days are better, other worse. This one tip more in favour of the latter.

How much can a man grieve before it destroys him, Sherlock? All I know is that I’ve grieved enough to last a lifetime. That said, I’ll never stop grieving you. You were the best thing that ever happened to me. Being in your orbit, saved my life. I was so lost back then, and now I’m even more lost. Because now I know what it’s like to be whole, to have a purpose, to wake every day, feeling excited about what may await me. A new case, a severed head in the fridge, listening to beautiful music from your violin, having takeaway from our favourite places, or dinner at Angelo’s, bantering with you about the lack of milk, or nagging you to eat something. There are so many things that vanished from my life when you died, Sherlock. Are you aware of that? I’m just existing nowadays. The amount of tears I’ve shed could fill the pond in Regent’s Park. I’ve hid them here at Baker Street. Out and about I put on a mask. Motionless. Stony. Speaking of. I’ve only been to your grave once since the funeral. The stone fits you. Polished, black with golden letters. Only your name. No dates or quotes. I talked to you when I stood in front of that stone. Asked you for a favour. To do one last magic trick. For me.

For an unknown reason, John enables comments after this entry, but hours go by, and the comment sections are still empty. Maybe he’d miscalculated people’s interest in him. After all, the readers of his blog were all interested in Sherlock, not in him, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise.

He takes a shower and heads for the bedroom when he hears a sound he hasn’t heard for ages. Someone’s commented on the blog. Probably Molly or Mike. His curiosity gets the better of him, though. The comment is on the last entry.

I heard you. SH

A bit angsty. I can reveal that I shed my share of tears throughout alongside with John...

@totallysilvergirl @notjustamumj @raina-at @meetinginsamarra @topsyturvy-turtely @peanitbear

#sherlock fandom #sherlock #sherlock fanfic #john watson #bbc sherlock #ao3 fanfic #may prompts #letters #johnlock

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count-thotticus · 1 month

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dancing with your ghost

Fandom: JJK

Pairing: SatoSugu

Rating: G

Words: 0.8k

Summary: Satoru goes home after the KFC incident and faces the gaping hole in his life where Suguru should be.

Tags: Implied relationship, Hurt no comfort

Notes: I wrote and submitted this to the ASTL 2024 fanfic challenge with the prompt "ghost" back in April and just now remembered that I never posted it. It didn't win anything, but I still like it enough to post. Might fuck around and expand on it some day, but don't hold your breath. Inspiration is fleeting and so rarely aligns with appropriate timing and tech availability. Cross-posted to AO3 @ sorceress_of_gallifrey

The problem with losing Suguru wasn’t that he was gone. Well, it was. But it was also the memories that he left in his wake. That day in Shibuya at the KFC, Satoru didn’t just lose his best friend; he lost a piece of his soul, and when he went home, he was haunted by the traces of his presence. The smell of his cologne, the hair ties on the dresser, the unkempt sheets. All reminders of the hole that had been carved into his life by the only man--the only person--to ever make himself at home there.

Satoru lay in his bed--on his usual side because he couldn’t yet bring himself to lie where Suguru should be--and stared at the ceiling, willing his eyes not to water and his mind not to wander. Around him, it was as though he could see echoes of the time they shared: the floor where they sat to play cards with Shoko, the kitchenette where Suguru cooked dinner while Satoru snuck bites when he thought he wasn’t looking, the window that, in the morning, let in just enough light at just the right angle to perfectly outline the angles of Suguru’s face while he slept, the bed where they lie intertwined to sleep…

He grabbed his pillow and pressed it over his face when he felt his eyes pricking with a rarely felt wetness, not caring about how it crushed his glasses into his nose. Satoru hadn’t cried in years--he was the strongest, after all--but tonight was a losing battle. As the sunlight waned, so did his will to remain stoic. He felt his shoulders shaking and hot tears wet the lenses of his glasses but inside he was still in denial.

Suguru would come back. He would realize this whole argument was silly and he’d be knocking on Satoru’s door by morning, asking to reconcile and compromise their differing ideologies.

Right?

A small part of Satoru’s mind knew this was a fallacy and was kicking himself for not saying more, doing more to make him stay. What’s worse, the signs were there for months: Suguru pulling away, spending nights that bled into days in his own dorm rather than Satoru’s, the haunted look and accompanying dark circles under his eyes. Satoru knew it wasn’t just the “summer stress”. Something changed after the incident with Riko and Toji. Something changed in the way Suguru looked at the world, and yet Satoru did nothing. He wanted to be there for Suguru, he just didn’t know how. And instead of trying, he watched his one and only slip through his fingers.

Satoru released the death grip he had on his pillow and rolled onto his side to look out the window. It had to be after midnight by now and the moonlight illuminated Satoru’s pale skin and light hair in the darkness. Suguru always glowed in the sunlight as it deepened the warm undertones of his skin and hair, but he’d described the same of Satoru in the moonlight. Satoru almost smiled as he thought of the perfectly matched contrast between them before the events of today came crashing down again.

Worn out from his tears, he fell asleep gripping the sheets of Suguru’s spot, hoping against hope that when he woke, his hand would be on his lover’s chest, not the cold sheets of his absence.

When he opened his eyes, he was back at the KFC. He watched as, once again, Suguru turned his back and said, “If you want to kill me, then kill me. There’d be meaning in that.”

But something had changed. Instead of preparing an attack he knew he’d never follow through on, Satoru took off running and threw his arms around him. Suguru tensed, but Satoru held tighter. “Don’t just walk away. Just come back and I’ll listen to you. Please say something. Please talk to me,” he begged with his face buried in Suguru’s shoulder.

A moment passed and Satoru thought he would just throw his arms off and leave again. That is, until Suguru raised a hand and gently placed it over one of Satoru’s, not trying to pull away, but just holding it. His shoulders softened and he turned in Satoru’s arms to face him. His eyes had softened and his lips held the slightest smile. “That’s all I’ve been asking for.” He pressed their foreheads together and added, “Let’s go home, Satoru.”

Relief washed through Satoru’s chest and the vice grip holding his heart started to loosen as they headed back to Jujutsu High. The walk was silent, but comfortable, a tacit agreement to save the talking for their return. Satoru was anxious for what this discussion would hold, but he didn’t care. Having Suguru with him was enough.

The sunlight was warm on his face and he could swear he felt Suguru’s warmth at his side just as he had when they walked hand in hand, but when he opened his eyes, one side of his bed was still empty. Where the sunlight should be dancing on an angular jawline and hair so dark it could’ve been black if not for the brown reflections in the light, there was only a ghost.

Satoru’s heart sank.

There really was no curse more twisted than love.

#jjk #stsg #jujutsu kaisen #satosugu #fanfiction #fanfic #count thot writes #the kfc incident #kfc breakup #dancing with your ghost #songfic #astl 2024 fanfic challenge #astl 2024 #cross posted to ao3

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phillippadgettwrites · 1 year

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The First Time, Every Time: The Jersey Devil

Rated X / 2470 words / Posted on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic

She asks Rob to drop her off at the Hoover building instead of her apartment, and when he pulls up to the curb she immediately unbuckles her seatbelt and tugs on the door handle to discourage him from getting out of the car. She suspects that he might try to kiss her, and the idea makes her nose wrinkle. She can already hear Ellen asking her what’s wrong with him, why she isn’t interested, and she’s not even sure what her answer will be.

On paper, he’s perfect. He’s the kind of man her father would like to see her dating, save for the fact that he already has one marriage and a child under his belt. Nothing he said or did during their date offended her or gave her reason to think that they might not be a good match, but despite all that she just found the entire evening…painfully boring. She surprised herself when her reaction to Mulder paging her in the middle of their meal was relief rather than annoyance.

She makes her way towards the basement of the Hoover, her heels ticking loudly against the linoleum and bouncing a clatter of sound through the deserted halls. The soft glow of desk lamps illuminate otherwise darkened rooms here and there—other lonely souls avoiding the reality of solitude with work—but for the most part the building is empty. The relative stillness makes her realize that the two glasses of wine she downed to make Rob’s monologue on shared custody more tolerable have left her on the edge of tipsy, which feels like an inappropriate state to be in at her workplace. She feels the distinct flutter of excitement mount as the elevator lowers her into the bowels of the building, and brushes away the nagging worry that Mulder will find her late-night arrival odd.

Her lingering crush on him is inconvenient, mostly because it makes her second guess herself and worry about what he thinks of her more than she’s comfortable with. Missy used to tease her mercilessly about her unrequited fixation on boys who would never like her back: the captain of the football team, the student body president, her chemistry T.A. Being the girl who is smart but not sexy, cute but not pretty, a great friend but not girlfriend material, is a truth she has carried with her into adulthood. And here she is again, ditching a man who is well within her league and actually interested in her in order to spend time with a man who will never see her as anything more than a colleague.

That’s not to say she wants him to, of course—she has already thoroughly learned her lesson regarding mixing work and pleasure. There’s just something primal about wanting a person you are unrelentingly attracted to to see you in the same way, even if you never intend to act on it.

She arrives before his office door, pink-cheeked and inexplicably nervous, and raps three times with her knuckle.

“It’s open,” he calls out, and she pushes the door just wide enough to poke her head through.

Mulder is hunched over his desk, head raised expectantly. When he sees her, his eyes narrow and he glances behind him at the clock on the wall.

“Scully, what are you doing here? What happened to your date?” he asks, and she feels a flush of embarrassment.

“It’s, um—we were finished. I mean, it’s over,” she stammers awkwardly as she steps the rest of the way through the door. “I just thought—I wasn’t sure if you might still be working. If you might need my help. With the case,” she finishes, turning her back to him briefly as she hangs her purse and mouths oh my god to herself at her own lack of eloquence.

When she turns to face him, she finds that he’s now sitting back in his chair, eyebrows raised and mouth slightly agape. His eyes flash down to her feet and then back up her body, and when they land on her face he looks away. Reflexively, Scully looks down at her outfit to see if she spilled something on her shirt, then touches her hair in case it’s fallen out of place. Everything appears to be in order.

Mulder clears his throat and picks up a sheet of paper from the desktop.

“Of course, I could always use your help. Take a look at this drawing based on the description from one of the eyewitnesses,” he says, and Scully walks around the desk to stand beside him.

The drawing is rudimentary, almost childlike, depicting a distinctly female form that resembles an ogre. Scully cracks a smile.

“This is a bit different than your typical fare,” she jokes, then turns to look at him.

She finds that his eyes are already on her, lingering somewhere around her waist. As before, he sees that she’s looking at him and quickly averts his eyes.

“Sorry,” he blurts out, busying himself with organizing the persistent mess on his desk. “You look—sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

Scully frowns and looks down at her outfit again. Ellen had helped her pick it out, and she felt comfortable and confident in it all evening, until now.

“Do I look silly?” she asks self-consciously, smoothing her hands over her hips.

“No!” Mulder says, too abruptly, snapping his head back over to look at her. “No, not at all. You look great. You look amazing, actually.”

Scully smiles demurely and looks back to the drawing. “Thank you.”

“Not that you don’t normally look great,” he continues, rambling nervously. “But your work suits are decidedly less…fitted.”

He stops talking and Scully slowly lifts her head to look at him. He’s cringing, the fingers of one hand resting on his temple in an attempt to shield his face. Meanwhile, she can’t keep the smile off hers.

“I made it weird, didn’t I?” he asks, stealing glances at her.

“No, you didn’t make it weird,” she assures him, turning to rest her hip against the edge of the desk, her confidence restored.

Mulder pivots his chair to face her, and while his eyes are on her face she can sense that he is still gawking at her from his periphery. She feels warm and a little scared, but also excited.

“So, how was your date?” he asks, and she pretends to examine the drawing again, using her own peripheral vision to watch him raking his eyes over her body.

“Fine,” she says, disinterested.

“You gonna go out with him again?”

She shrugs, then sets the drawing back down on the desk.

“Maybe. Maybe not. I haven’t decided.”

Mulder stands abruptly and his chair goes skittering across the floor until it knocks up against a metal filing cabinet. Scully flinches, but her reaction is cut short when he steps up behind her, so close she can feel his pectoral muscles pressing into her back.

“See?” he asks, reaching around her to trace his finger along the curved lines indicating breasts on the drawing. “It’s female.”

“Compelling,” she attempts to say dryly, but her voice catches in her throat.

His other hand comes to rest on the front of her hip, and she freezes as her heart begins to race. She should tell him to stop. She should leave. But she doesn’t want to.

Mulder stoops a little, and she feels the heat of his breath near her ear, and then the rush of a deep inhale.

“You smell good,” he says quietly, and she squeezes her thighs together.

“What are you doing?” she asks, just as quietly. Some part of her is still afraid that she’s misreading the situation.

“Do you want me to stop?”

A pause.

“No.”

His arms go around her waist, pulling her flush against him, and she feels the firm ridge of his erection press into her lower back. She’s terrified, exhilarated, in utter disbelief. She feels as though she’s outside her own body, watching from above as she covers Mulder’s hand with her own and pushes it down her belly and under the waist of her pants. She would never do this. Never. But somehow she is. Mulder makes a little sound somewhere between a moan and a sigh, then brings his other hand in to undo the clasp on her trousers. They fall to the floor, puddling around her heels, and all that covers her is the lace bodysuit that snaps between her legs. None of her panties were practical to wear beneath it.

“God, look at you,” Mulder mumbles, mostly to himself, as he leans over her shoulder to look down at her body. He leans away for a moment to get a look at the back, and she feels her cheeks warm, remembering that it’s a thong. “You’re gorgeous, Scully.”

She can feel how wet she is, just from the knowledge that he wants her. He palms her breasts, then sends his hands lower. Down and down, following the lace fabric between her legs. He hums, and she knows he feels it too. She startles as she hears three quick pops, and then feels cool air on her vulva as he unsnaps the body suit and exposes her.

“Oh,” he says, feeling her bare skin beneath his fingertips. “I thought you’d be wearing…sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she breathes out, trembling as his fingers follow the seam of her leg and slide past her vulva on one side, and then the other.

“Okay?” he repeats, inching closer to her opening.

She snakes her arm behind her back and rubs him firmly over his slacks.

“Okay,” she says confidently, and from there it unravels at a breakneck pace.

She watches from above as he strips off his belt and pushes his pants and boxers down to the floor. She watches him fold her in half over the side of his desk, then drop to his knees and push his face into the valley of her ass cheeks. She feels his tongue, hot and wet, prodding at everything he can reach, and just when she thinks she might come, he stands up and runs the head of his cock along the same path.

“You’re sure?” he asks through gritted teeth, and she pushes her hips back against him, taking him in halfway.

She would never do this. Not with her partner, not in his office, not with the door half open, not without a condom. She would never, and yet she is. All she can think about his how good it feels to be wanted, to be fucked with so much vigor. She steals a glance over her shoulder to see his face, to see the way he’s looking at her, and she finds him slack-jawed, his dress shirt bunched up under his armpits so he can see the place where he’s slipping in and out of her. He catches her looking and holds her eye, increasing the snap of his hips as he bumps her higher and higher with each slap of his thighs against hers. Her eyes slide closed, and a wash of pleasure spreads through her limbs, gathering in her pelvis and shattering. She bites her lip to stay quiet, and Mulder grunts when he feels her, pulling out soon after and stroking himself until she feels the hot spill of him on her lower back.

She’s panting, still floating in the middle place where she doesn’t have to think about what she’s just done. And then she hears the elevator ding.

They both freeze, waiting. There is the distinct scuff of shoes on linoleum, and Scully stands too quickly. Her head spins and Mulder grabs her elbow as she tries to steady herself on her high heels, only one of which is still on her foot. They each scramble back into their clothes, and she stuffs the tails of the body suit into her pants as Mulder shoves his shirt back into his slacks. By the time the interloper makes it to the office door, she’s already beside the coat rack, swinging her purse over her shoulder.

“You must be agent Scully,” says a friendly voice, and she turns to see an elderly man pushing a custodial cart, his bushy salt and pepper eyebrows lifting to afford him a better view. “You finally hung around late enough for me to meet you.”

The man smiles and Scully does her best to return it, though her stomach is doing adrenaline-fueled backflips.

“Scully, this is Sam,” Mulder says hoarsely, and she nods and offers her hand.

“Nice to meet you, Sam. I was actually just on my way out,” she says somewhat curtly, then hurries down the hall toward the elevator.

By the time she hails a cab and makes her way back to her apartment, there is already a message waiting for her on her answering machine. She knows it’s from him. She undresses right there in the hallway, frowning at the stain on the back of her shirt, as she hits play and listens to messages from her insurance broker and Ellen, asking how her date went.

Hi Dana, it’s Rob. I just wanted to say that I had a great time tonight, and I’d love to take you out again. You have my number, give me a call when you’re ready. Take care.

Delete.

The next message starts with an agonized sigh.

Hey, Scully, it’s me. I, um—fuck. I hope you’re okay. I’ll call you again when I get back to my apartment.

The message ends, and she plays it again, though she’s not entirely sure what she’s listening for. On her third listen, the phone rings, and she snatches it up off the cradle a little too quickly.

“Hello?”

“Hey.”

There’s a long pause. Scully looks down at her naked body, and the soiled body suit she still holds in her hand.

“It’s okay, Mulder. I’m fine,” she says, and she hears him let out a relieved sigh. “I think maybe I had a few too many glasses of wine at dinner,” she adds lightheartedly, and he chuckles.

“I think maybe I was staring at that drawing a little too long,” he jokes, and she gives him the courtesy of a laugh in response.

“Maybe just forget it ever happened, huh?” she suggests, wringing the bodysuit in her hands.

“Yeah, probably for the best,” he agrees.

Another long pause.

“Goodnight, Mulder.”

“Night, Scully.”

She’s moving the phone away from her ear when she hears him speak again.

“What was that?” she asks.

“I was just saying—I just wanted you to know. You really did look great tonight. That guy is lucky he got to take you out.”

She feels herself smiling, knowing that Mulder was certainly the lucky one of the two tonight.

“Thank you, Mulder.”

“Goodnight.”

“Bye.”

#x files fanfic #the x files #xf fic #xf fanfic #dana scully #fox mulder #smut #xfiles

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whatstruthgottodowithit · 1 year

Text

Untethered

Fandom: Elvis Presley, American Actor

Pairing: Elvis Presley x Original Female Character

Characters: Elvis Presley, Original Female Character, Addison Goodwin, Joe Goodwin, Mona Goodwin, Jess Goodwin, Lisa Marie Presley, Gladys Presley, Vernon Presley, Minnie Mae ‘Dodger’ Presley

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 4319

Summary: Addison and Elvis have made it through more than most but that was because despite everything they always had each other. As if their souls were tethered but what happens when the rope snaps.

Tags/Warnings: Flashbacks, Love, Established Relationship, Cuddles, Hugging, Arguing, Parents, Implied Death, Implied Sickness, Family Arguments,

Notes: I'm up watching the candlelight vigil so I might as well post!

This a fic that links to The Girl He Left Behind/Here You Come Again. Set after Here You Come again by quite some years. Basically it’s the long and happy life Elvis deserved.

Special thanks to @ccab for letting me be such a masochist [and yes I cried writing it sue me]

LINK TO ELVIS & ADDISON MASTERPOST // LINK TO AO3 // LINK TO PINTEREST

Addison could hear them arguing. She was sure she wasn’t supposed to, not given how her father had told her to stay on the porch swing until he came back out or how they attempted to say everything in harsh whispers, yet she could hear every word as it floated through the open window. And to make matters worse they were arguing about her.

‘And who’s going to watch her?’ Joe said hands on his hips as he watched his wife rifle through her purse which she had just picked up off the hallway dresser. She was dressed differently from before, Addison could only see through a small crack in the curtains, but her robe was gone now, replaced by a sleek black dress and her shoes, the ones she had shouted at Addison for playing in earlier today - the reason her daddy had found her crying on the front porch - clacked along the wooden floor.

‘You’re her parent too y’know,’ Mona said her gaze never looking his way as she slipped a compact out of her purse and checked her appearance.

‘And when I have to go to work? When you traipse in at God knows what hour or better still don’t come home? What then?’

‘You’ll figure it out Joey you always do,’ Mona said sarcastically, blotting her lipstick with her finger before she snapped the compact closed and threw it in her purse and then finally looked up at the man in front of her.

‘I make it work because I have to! Because you make me-‘ he snapped, his voice growing heated as he felt his frustration mounting.

‘Make you?! I didn’t make you do anything! You wanted a kid, begged me remember? Now you’re trying to blame me for what you signed us up for,’ Mona said in a tight whisper making Joe push a hard lump down in his throat, ‘you wanted Addison. I wanted my life.’

‘Addison is our life,’ Joe said angrily waiting for his wife to say something, anything that might insinuate she agreed if even the slightest amount but she watched him, stony faced and unyielding.

‘I’ve had her all day you have no idea what it’s like,’ she said eventually.

‘What would you rather go to work? Bust your hump every damn day to put food on the table,’ Joe argued.

‘Be a damn sight easier!’ Mona snapped, ‘do you know what’s it like? She doesn’t want me, Joe. Every day is the same. I’m never the one she wants, it’s always Daddy this, Daddy that when I’m the one home with her all day.’

‘She’s a kid Mona! Kids push your buttons,’ Joe said.

‘Well she can push yours tonight,’ she said slinging her purse onto her shoulder as she headed to the door.

‘So what you’re just gonna run out every time it gets hard? We need you Mona,’ Joe said following her. Mona paused, her hand on the door handle before she looked back at her husband, ‘and what about what I need?’

And before Joe could protest she wrenched open the door an flung herself down the garden path. Joe moved forward, standing in the door frame as he watched his wife climb into the cab that was idling in the middle of the street before it took off at speed. He only looked up when he heard a tiny voice speak from somewhere on the porch.

‘Is Mama mad at me?’ Addison said with a sniffle as she sunk back down onto her bottom pretending she hadn’t been kneeling up at the window, listening to every word. Joe looked at her, forcing a smile as he walked towards her sitting down on the swing beside her as she climbed onto his lap.

‘No baby she’s not mad at you,’ Joe said placing a kiss on the top of her head.

‘Then where’d she go?’ she asked as she looked out at the garden in front of them.

‘She’s had to pop out to see a friend,’ Joe lied.

‘But she’s coming back?’ Addison asked hopefully.

‘Of course baby,’ Joe said though he wasn’t sure that was the case.

‘Okay,’ Addison said quietly cuddling into him as he started to rock the porch swing with his feet.

The sun was sinking in the sky now, creating orange and pink streaks above the houses across from them. And his baby girl was nuzzled into him, her little fingers playing with the chain he was wearing around his neck as he rocked them.

Any other time it would’ve been a nice moment. But not tonight.

He had just gotten home from a long day at work, back breaking labour he was hoping would be followed by a nice meal and maybe an ice-cold drink. But that wasn’t the scene he was greeted with when he got home. No, as he pulled up he found his little girl sitting on their front porch sobbing her heart out. She had been waiting for him and ran to him the moment he had put his foot on the garden path, burying herself in his neck as her tears made his already sweat soaked shirt damper. He had asked her what was wrong but she hadn’t managed to get her words out, every bit of speech broken by sniffles and erratic breaths as she tried to explain herself.

But as he stepped over the threshold of his home he knew what was the matter. Mona.

He had placed Addison down and told her to stay on the porch until he came back out and though she was still sniffling and her lashes were clumped together with tears she had nodded allowing him to go into the house alone.

As he walked towards the back of the house he could sense something was up. Mona was flitting around the kitchen taking pots off the stove and decanting vegetables onto two plates on the countertop. It was a domestic scene that would be seen all over the United States tonight and yet their scene wouldn’t unfold like everyone else’s would. His wife wouldn’t kiss him as he greeted her. She wouldn’t serve him his dinner or ask him about his day. She wouldn’t put their little girl to bed, the pair of them making sure she was soundly asleep before they settled down enjoying one another’s company.

No tonight would go as it had a thousand times before. Mona would throw a haphazard meal on the table and then she would leave for whatever good time she had managed to arrange. He would make sure Addison was fed, ask her what had made her cry which she would no doubt inform him to be something her mother had said or did, and then he would bath her and put her to bed wondering if his wife would be laying in the bed beside him in the morning.

All of that had been put into motion the moment he had asked her why Addison was crying.

That had been what had led him into the argument, it had been the reason the pair of them were now sitting on the porch swing both as broken as the other. The only bonus was that Addison seemed to have stopped crying, fresh tears didn’t even seem to come as she watched Mona flee from them as if she were leaving the scene of a crime. Yet that hurt in its own way. It hurt so much that he had to peel himself away from her.

He needed time to rebuild himself, if only the ten minutes it would take to finish dinner, so he could be there for her when the inevitable questions rolled in.

‘Addie?’ he asked causing her large hazel eyes to look up at him expectantly, forcing a wave of sadness to flow through him at just how familiar they looked, ‘I’m gonna make dinner okay?’

‘Okay,’ she said as he moved her off him, placing a kiss on the top of her head before he stood up.

‘You stayin’ out here?’ he asked earning a nod in response. It was a small relief, at least holed away in the kitchen he could let his emotions flood through him without upsetting her, ‘okay. But don’t go wanderin’ off ya hear me? You ain’t allowed out of this yard.’

‘I know,’ she said with a smile.

And then he headed inside the house and out of sight. Addison watched him go before she sat back on the porch swing. She didn’t want to stay outside, it was getting late and a chill was flowing through the air making her shiver in her thin dress but she knew it was better to be here. If her daddy had wanted her outside whilst they argued he’d want her out of the way when he cried.

She couldn’t hear it this time, he was deep enough in the house that she couldn’t hear anything but she was sure he would cry. Like he always did when him and her mama fought. She didn’t know why. She didn’t know how he could hold her and make her feel like everything was better and yet he couldn’t fix himself. How her mama could leave him so broken.

It made her tiny heart hurt.

She had heard how her Mama had complained about her wanting him and it was true that throughout the day she had asked for him nigh on a thousand times. It had gotten on her mother’s nerves and so she had told her to go and play though she didn’t say anything about staying out of her parents’ closet. She had been trying on one of her mother’s fancy necklaces and walking around in the shoes that clacked along the floor when her mother had found her. She had yelled blue murder, yanking Addison up until the shoes dropped off her feet and clattered onto the floor. And then she had shoved her through the bedroom door, screaming about how she could never have anything nice, how Addison was nothing but trouble.

It had made her cry and that had only seemed to make her mother angrier and so Addison had fled to the safety of the front porch, waiting for her dad to get home. He always made her feel better. He never made her feel the way her mother did.

That was why she wanted him around. She knew her Daddy loved her, her mother she wasn’t so sure about.

As the sun continued to set and the chill got worse Addison got up from her seat on the porch swing, moving into a strip of sunshine that warmed her body in a way that made her feel a touch happier. She was revelling in the warmth as she watched a bug flit between the gap in the concrete of the porch floor, her finger chasing it as it ran into the shadows, but her attention was caught as she heard a chugging engine coming down the street and looked up to find a truck pulling into the driveway beside them. Addison scooted forward; her face pressed close to the wooden slats of the porch fence as she watched with curiosity. The house beside them belonged to Mrs Miller, a kind older woman who always gave her candy whenever she saw her by the fence. But Mrs Miller hadn’t been home for a while so this car pulling up was odd.

Addison watched as the car stopped and a man she didn’t recognise jumped out. He looked like her daddy, though where her daddy lacked a smile, he couldn’t seem to stop, especially as the rest of the car’s passengers started to disembark. Addison watched as a lady stepped out, not as smiley though she did brighten up as the man continued to talk gesturing to bits of Mrs Miller’s house. Addison watched as he threw his arm around her shoulders, kissing her temple as he spoke animatedly about the house in front of them. Though she could see how happy they were it made her feel sad, it made her wonder why her parents couldn’t be like that.

Then she was distracted as she heard the clunk of a car door and looked across to find a boy a bit older than her making his way around the back of the car until he was at the other side, opening the door and helping out an older woman until she was firmly on solid ground. As he helped her up the path that had become overgrown and unloved in Mrs Miller’s absence Addison watched him.

He wasn’t a teenager but he was definitely older than her. His hair was sandy blonde, though it seemed almost as brown as hers as it was combed tightly to his head, the product he had used to get it that way making it look darker. Addison leaned in closer, watching him as he took a spot beside the younger woman, finally making a larger smile play on her lips.

‘What are ya doing down there, baby?’ she heard Joe say forcing her to whip around so quick as though she had been caught doing something she shouldn’t. Though as he watched her his gaze travelled beyond where she was sitting, clocking the fact there were now people next door. Addison watched as he waved to them and found the man she didn’t know waving back.

‘You wanna meet our new neighbours?’ Joe asked. Addison looked towards the family for a second and then back at her daddy who was waiting patiently then she nodded. Joe offered out a hand which she ran to, his large one encircling hers as they walked down the front steps and towards the fence where the man was now waiting, the rest of them talking amongst themselves.

‘Found it okay then?’ Joe asked with a smile as he leaned across the fence to embrace the man, his other hand still holding Addison’s who was watching them closely.

‘Yeah, just followed your directions,’ Vernon said, ‘again I can’t thank ya enough.’

‘Oh you know it was no bother,’ Joe said, ‘Jack didn’t sting ya too hard on the rent did he?’

‘Nah,’ the man said, ‘I think he’s just happy someone’s gonna be lookin’ after the place.’

‘Well from what I hear his mom’s gonna be headed to a long-term facility after hospital so you never know he might make it permanent,’ Joe said.

‘I hope so,’ the woman said appearing at the man’s side as she offered her hand out, ‘Gladys.’

‘Joe,’ Joe said, ‘nice we can finally meet. Vernon’s told me all about you.’

‘Only good stuff,’ Vernon ribbed.

‘Likewise,’ Gladys said rolling her eyes at her husband before she noticed the little girl standing beside him watching her inquisitively.

‘Which means you must be Addison,’ the woman Addison now knew as Gladys said looking down on her with a kind smile. She smiled back but tucked herself behind her dad’s leg as a blush flooded through her.

‘Hey now who are you tryin’ to convince you’re shy?’ Joe chuckled stroking her hair, ‘say hello baby.’

‘Hello,’ Addison said quietly.

‘Hi there,’ Gladys said.

‘Hi sweetheart,’ Vernon said with a smile.

‘You want me to come over and show ya round? I think they’ll have switched the power and gas off at the mains but everything’s the same as ours so I can show you how to get set up,’ Joe said.

‘You wouldn’t mind?’ Gladys asked.

‘Of course not,’ Joe said.

‘Thanks man,’ Vernon said as Joe nodded and climbed over the small fence one leg at a time before he turned back to Addison. She let him pick her up but as he placed her down on the other side of the fence, she stopped realising the boy from before was watching her. He was leaning against the truck, his blue eyes watching her closely as she looked towards him.

Then she found herself moving, her shyness from earlier disappearing as if there was something tugging her forward. She only stopped when she was stood in front of him, her large hazel eyes looking up at him as she smiled.

‘Hi,’ she said.

‘Hi,’ Elvis said leaning up off the truck he had been resting on.

‘I’m Addie,’ she said.

‘Elvis,’ he said offering a hand out which he expected her to shake but she didn’t. Instead she dove headfirst into his midriff, her tiny arms wrapping around him though they didn’t meet at the back. His own hands moved to her back holding her to him though far more tentatively than she was hugging him. When she pulled back she smiled at him, offering her hand out for him to take which he did without thinking, unable to say no.

He could feel himself being tugged, his arm nearly wrenching out of the socket as she raced forward following the grownups. But it was more than that. The tugging didn’t feel as though it was coming from that small yet powerful hand, but from within them. Something tethering them together and for some reason he couldn’t help but smile.

As Addison pulled out of the memory she felt a tug deep inside her. She didn’t know why, after all that memory was a happy one and given that she was awash with all sorts of memories these days she should take comfort in the ones that were as nice as that. Though she supposed she shouldn’t be surprised, not when that tugging seemed to be a permanent fixture of her being these days, as if it was pulling her at the seams, trying to break her apart. Especially as she watched Elvis. He was lying in bed, his eyes closed and the book he had been reading on his chest though it slipped as he shifted, falling into the crevice of his arm and startling him awake. Though as he grabbed it he noticed her standing by the bathroom door watching over him and he smiled at her, that old familiar knee weakening smile – not changed by age.

‘What are you doin’ over there?’ he said quietly, ‘c’mere.’

Addison didn’t say anything but she obeyed his request, moving towards the bed and climbing on it until she was able to lay down beside him, moving the book as she nuzzled into his side, his arm going around her. He held her for a moment, his fingers tracing soft circles on her arm. Addison didn’t look up at him, soaking in his warmth as he held her, trying to commit this to be one of the memories that plagued her.

‘What are you thinking about?’ Elvis said after a moment.

‘The day we met,’ she said honestly, still staring out across the other side of the room though she felt him move his head no doubt looking down on her as he said, ‘yeah?’

‘Yeah,’ she said quietly.

‘The day at the fair?’ he asked.

‘No, the very first time,’ she said making him breath a laugh.

‘Jeez you remember that?’ he chuckled quietly, ‘I can barely remember what I had for breakfast.’

‘I don’t know how. It just…came to me,’ she said.

‘You were barely three years old,’ Elvis said.

‘I know,’ she said quietly. She didn’t know how she remembered it. How her brain had plucked something she hadn’t thought about for years out and made her relive it and yet she wasn’t surprised. It was something her mind was doing more and more. As a way to cheer her up or torture her she wasn’t sure. After a moment she said, ‘you know what I do remember?’

‘What honey?’ he asked knowing there was more to whatever she was thinking about.

‘My mama and daddy were arguing if you can believe that,’ Addison said making Elvis chuckle, ‘so I was trying to ignore them. Took myself out on the front porch so I couldn’t hear my daddy cryin’….and then I see this big ol’ truck pull up and this nice couple get out followed by this older lady and then this skinny little thing helpin’ her out of the car-’

‘Lean not skinny,’ Elvis corrected making Addison smile.

‘This lean little thing,’ she corrected before she continued, ‘and y’know they looked happy. The mom and dad were smiling and the kid he seemed so kind and I just wanted to run right into the middle of it. To barrel headfirst across my garden until I was in it. In the middle of all that love.’

‘Addie your daddy loved you more than anything in this world you know that,’ Elvis said holding her a touch tighter.

‘I know and I wouldn’t have traded him for the world but I always wanted to be a part of it,’ she whispered.

‘A part of what honey?’ Elvis asked.

‘Your world,’ she said trying to push down the lump in her throat as she spoke, ‘I was drawn to it like a rope tied around my middle pulling me to it. To you.’

‘I know what you mean,’ Elvis said. He had felt it too. Every time she had walked into his life there was this pull, something pulling them together until they were tethered. It hadn’t been an easy road but it was never one they could escape. That was why he felt his heart shatter as she spoke again, this time in barely more than a whisper.

‘What am I gonna do when the rope snaps?’ she asked. Tears were falling now, rolling down her cheeks and onto the cotton of his pyjamas no doubt creating damp patches he would be able to feel but she couldn’t stop them.

‘Oh Ads,’ he sighed. They’d had conversations like this before but he’d never heard the fear in his voice that was present now. She’d always kept herself contained, strong.

‘I mean it. What do I do?’ she asked with a sniffle, ‘because I know you keep saying you’re ready. I know you believe in whatever’s up there…but what if I’m not? What if I’m never going to be ready El? All my life you’ve been there in some form, the rope pulling us back together.’

‘You think I wanna go?’ Elvis said unevenly, he could feel his own tears stinging in his eyes but he forced them back. It was the first sign of vulnerability she had shown and he wasn’t going to make her take care of him, ‘honey I would stay here with you forever if I could you know that…but God…he’s got other plans.’

‘He should change ‘em,’ she said attempting a joke though it was barren of mirth.

‘Only you would be so stubborn as to ask God to make an exception,’ Elvis chuckled.

‘You know me,’ she said. She pulled back, placing her hand on his chest as her hazel eyes found his blue ones each watching the other with the same pained yet loving look.

‘You’re right. I do,’ Elvis said moving a strand of hair off her face, ‘and I know you well enough to know you’re strong enough to survive this. I know that you’ll know what to do. That you’ll look after our girls, our grand babies and anyone else who needs it. I know that you’ll take care of ‘em the way you’ve took care of me all these years.’

‘But I could take care of everything because I had you,’ Addison said, her voice breaking as a fresh wave of tears rolled down her cheeks.

‘And you will,’ Elvis said firmly, ‘do you think I’d every truly leave you? Baby I was always with you and I always will be. I’ll be with you in everything you do and then one day we’ll be back together. You’ll see.’

As tears fell she tried to contain herself but she couldn’t stop the sob that broke free at his words, at the thought of him not being beside her as he had been all these years. Elvis moved his thumb across her cheek, swiping the dampness from under one of her eyes as he watched her.

‘Tell me you believe me,’ he said. Addison watched him. She had been so strong up to now yet as their deadline seemed to grow closer she felt more and more doubt creep in. Even when they had been apart she had always had him, she had known he wasn’t too far away. And she wanted to believe that would still be the case, that what he believed would be right, but she didn’t want to find out. She didn’t want him to go. Not yet. Yet as his blue eyes watched her she couldn’t tell him no. She couldn’t allow her doubt to ruin him. Not if that brought him any ounce of comfort.

‘I do,’ she nodded.

‘Good, though I demand you take your sweet time,’ he jested.

‘When do I ever do what you tell me,’ Addison said allowing his joke to lighten the sombre mood.

‘You will this time you hear me?’ Elvis said, an air of seriousness running through his tone, ‘because this life it still has so much left for you Addie…so promise me you’ll make the most of it.’

‘I promise,’ Addison said, putting her head down on his chest again as he clasped his hand over hers, his heart beating steadily under their touch.

‘Elvis?’ she asked after a moment.

‘Yeah?’

‘Can we just be us for now? No making the most of anything, no thinking about anything…just you and me?’ she asked. She had given him his comfort now she just hoped he would give her what she needed.

‘Whatever you want honey,’ Elvis said kissing the top of her head.

‘I love you,’ she said shakily.

‘I love you too.’

SERIES TAGS

@girlblogger2002 @sania562 @caitlin1996 @literally-just-elvis-fics @notstefaniepresley @artlesson8892 @18lkpeters @velvetelvis @jaqueline19997 @elvispresleyxoxo @amydarcimarie @presleyenterprise @everythingelvispresley @elvispresleywife @lillypink @richardslady121 @lettersfromvenus @louisejoy86 @ccab

#my writing #elvis and addison #elvis presley #elvis fic #elvis presley fic #elvis angst #elvis presley x ofc #here you come again #the girl he left behind #untethered

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