#benefit ball

[newyorkthegoldenage]

The Duke and Duchess of Windsor and Elsa Maxwell at the Anta Theater Ball in the main ballroom of the Plaza Hotel, January 16, 1951. The ball was held for the benefit of the Academy Fund Campaign and the American National Theater.

Photo: Matty Zimmerman for the AP via the Evening Standard

[untitledgoosegay]

re last reblog I do see fanfic culture pushing/replicating a certain model of "what trauma looks like," "how trauma works"

this is a problem across all areas of society obviously, but transformative works are, well, transformative. they're about crafting and modifying narratives where the fan-creator sees a flaw or a lack -- often for the better! don't get me wrong, I've done my fair share of "I take a hammer and I fix the canon," it's the main thing that gets my creative gears spinning -- but what happens when that "flaw" is simply a narrative not conforming to popular expectations?

some people just don't get PTSD from events that sound obviously traumatic. they're not masking, and they're not coping; they just straight-up didn't get the permanently-locked stress-response that defines PTSD. they walk away from a horrible experience going "well, that sucked, but it's over now." some people do get PTSD from events most people wouldn't find traumatic. we don't really know why some people get PTSD and others don't. but fandom has an idea of events that must be traumatizing, of a "correct" way to portray trauma. you see the problems with this lack of understanding in e.g. fans pressuring the devs of Baldur's Gate 3 to add dialogue where the player character badgers Halsin about his own feelings on his abuse -- because he must be traumatized, and his trauma must fit a certain mold and presentation of sexual trauma, under the mistaken impression that anything outside that narrow window is somehow "wrong" and disrespectful or even harmful to survivors.

take, for another example, the very common trope of a traumatized character who hates touch or sex "learning" to like touch or sex as a part of their healing process. certainly that can be healing for some people; other people will never like, or want, touch or sex, because of trauma or because they just don't. the assumption that someone who doesn't want sex or doesn't like to be touched must be traumatized, must be suffering from this perceived lack, is seriously harmful -- to asexual people, to people with sensory issues around touch, and to people for whom healing from trauma means freedom to refuse sex or touch.

and there's a secondary trope, one that's slightly more thoughtful but ultimately repeats the problem -- that once someone has learned that their boundaries will be respected, they'll feel it's safe to soften those boundaries. once they feel safe refusing touch or sex, they'll feel comfortable allowing it on their own terms. but many people don't, and many people won't! many people will simply never want to be touched, and never want sex, and they are not suffering or broken or lacking because of it. the idea that proving you'll respect someone's boundaries entitles you to test those boundaries -- the paradox is obvious, and yet this is something i've seen hurt (re-traumatize) people i care for.

people are imperfect victims. people don't heal in the ways you expect. many people have positive memories of their abuse, of their abusers. many people hurt others in the course of their trauma, in ways that can't easily be unpacked in a 5k oneshot. very few narratives of trauma and recovery actually fit the ones put forward by popular children's media and romance novels -- which are the ones I most see replicated in fandom spaces, because they provide the clearest narrative and easiest catharsis, and so they're easy and soothing to reach for.

that's not necessarily a bad thing! i am not immune to goopy romance tropes. i am not immune to teary catharsis. not every fic has to grapple with ugly realities. but there's a problem when these narratives become predominant, when people think they're accurate and realistic depictions of trauma, when the truth of trauma is unpleasant and uncomfortable, and doesn't fit any single narrative, let alone one of comforting catharsis

[worldwright]

anyone stopped to appreciate that John managed to drive a 1930s car through northern Appalachia (which has infamously awful roads) in the dead of winter, with 1.5 limbs, which were attached to a guy who just fell down several mineshafts? and didn't die?

[creakysocks]

I was thinking abt piccolo and gohan talking after the events of superhero and wound up with this interaction between them

[njararna]

i am as always thinking about voltron. because i have issues. but i really and truly cannot get over vld’s flanderisation of lance’s character, it actually aggravates me to no end!!!

in the franchise, lance has been established to be an ace-flyer, incredibly perceptive (specifically in dotu and vttd, the source material + the closest sequel!), impulsive, and cocky—but his cockiness had SUBSTANCE. he knew he was that good. to me vforce has one of the best lance characterisations in how they get him: he’s a great flier, he’s a dependable figure of authority, he’s snarky, he bites back, he has the right amount of silliness and pettiness dotu lance had. in vforce, everyone could get teased by the narrative! it wasn’t one or two characters taking the brunt (hi vld hunk and lance!).

but in vld, they practically cut out all those parts of lance, the flying, the perceptiveness, his confidence, and then give it to keith (whose original personality had been then given to shiro). they leave him with the cockiness, but there’s nothing to back it up. they orchestrate keith and lance’s rivalry to be one-sided and terribly unbalanced because keith IS better than lance in a lot of things. this was never the case before, they had strengths and weaknesses that the other complemented and would sometimes cause conflict (vttd is a great example of this!).

i think the reason why it bothers me so much, is because this is first time lance has been latino and not white (not counting golion’s isamu in this). the first time! and the moment he is, they take away his skills and his strengths, have him bullied by the narrative and made into a joke, never taken seriously, and dialed up his flirtatiousness to over 9000. the only time i can actually recall lance being flirtatious in the franchise was in ddp’s run, but even then it wasn’t nearly as prominent or excessive as vld lance’s nonstop flirting. he gets keith’s leftover lion, he gets a sword like keith, he’s allura’s second choice, he never really finds his place in the team.

the arc of feeling like a seventh wheel or insecurity wouldn’t bother me if he had history in the franchise of this, if his character wasn’t established the way it was, but he doesn’t! and its not like vld’s narrative does much to disprove lance’s insecurity—in fact it winds up doing the opposite most of the time. on the surface vld and dotu lance seem similar, but deeper down i feel like the writers just…lost the plot. it’s not that you can’t branch out in reboots or explore other pathways, but it’s just so blatant to me in how they’d taken so much from him and passed it off to other characters. where’s the love for the source material in that? where’s the respect? i don’t know, maybe i’m just going on and on, but it haunts me.

[tvckerwash]

I hc wash and south (and by proxy, north) as all being ODSTs prior to pfl and one thing I really like about hcing them as such is that it adds another layer of depth to why they were all chosen to be a part of the recovery force.

ODSTs are a special forces unit within the marines, and they're generally used as force amplifiers and in high risk or sensitive operations. two such scenarios include the recovery or recapture of personal and high level assets behind enemy lines, as well as deep reconnaissance and intelligence gathering. ODSTs are also used in politically sensitive operations, which pfl was following the crash of the moi.

so basically, who better to be on the recovery force than former ODSTs who already have a background doing the kind of work that would need to be done?

this also adds to some of the tension between north and south as well imo, as while they're a great team who are capable of working together they clearly have two very different skillsets—south is not portrayed as someone who has the patience necessary for long reconnaissance missions, and part of the reason why team b failed so spectacularly is because two snipers and an intelligence operative are not a good choice for a smash and grab mission. had north been replaced with south things would've probably went way better for them, because south is actually fairly similar to wash in her "get in, get it done, get out" mentality, though where wash comes off as more methodical and is willing to take that "wait and see" approach, south throws caution to the wind and has a "we'll cross that bridge when we get there" approach.

this is probably why wash and south were (on paper at least) going to get eta and iota—south would've benefited greatly from having an ai that was afraid and anxious as it would force her to slow down and think things through more, and wash getting an ai that was happy and cheerful would force him to loosen up a bit and be less high-strung and serious.

[front-facing-pokemon]

[monarchetype]

I am being 100% dead serious when I say that Steel Ball Run's biggest weakness is that it needed more padding

[crimerhyme]

okay I am in with the bouquet train u///u maybe all Icejins we know with them? 👀

here is your lizard package! dont eat all the flowers at once

[the-fibre-stuff]

Knitting class at the school was yesterday, not today.

But today was pizza day.

As I'm sorting the boxes of pizza by class (the pizza shop does most of the work, we just need to read the names and then check the totals against the sheets for each class), some of the students I've been working with came through.

Now, yesterday was the last knitting class. I'm coming back next week, but that's a "where do you go from here?" presentation, not knitting time. One of the kids had forgotten this, and had been planning on starting a bunny yesterday. (Thank you so much to whoever suggested that project, it's been a huge hit). So I drew out the instructions for him, and he slid his stitches onto a chopstick (I don't have enough needles to let the kids keep them, but yarn is a consumable so they can keep it if they want).

Today, when he sees me in the hall, he calls out to me that he's finished the bunny.

I told him to bring it next week so he can show it to me.

[kmackatie]

sleep, with benefits

Caleb Widogast wakes up from the first good night of sleep in far too long. It takes him a moment to realise it's because he's not in his bed. Is it the better mattress (lump-free and like a cloud), or the fact he drunkenly slept with Essek Thelyss, the colleague he's been secretly crushing on for the last six months?

So I'm basically writing a 2000s romcom filled with miscommunication and pining, I hope you enjoy? Updates will be as they happen with no fixed schedule at this stage!

Rating: Explicit Fandom: Critical Role Relationship: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widgoast Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, POV Caleb Widogast, Friends With Benefits, Platonically Sleeping Together, Romantically Sleeping Together, Sexually Sleeping Together, Literal Sleeping Together, Explicit Sexual Content, and there was only one bed, Developing Relationship, accidentally sleeping with your colleague then pretending it didn't happen, this is a 2000s romcom filled with miscommunication and pining

[novembermorgon]

have you ever drawn jaehaera i think she would look so good in your art style she has that depressed and slightly unsettling swag like naerys?

i have :-)

i really like her but i cant think about her too much because i get really miserable

[astridthevalkyrie]

“eloise was so mean to those girls who had an interest in embroidery :(“ maybe they should’ve chosen something more interesting to talk about then!

[difeisheng]

alright, i'm really hoping di feisheng is playing his own internal game with the wansheng clan and shan gudao, and/or that he's actually been in contact with li xiangyi since he started scheming against jiao liqiao and the turncoat jinyuan alliance

[dubb0-g0ldfe11]

The beginnings of a forbidden relationship

Royal au because why not?

[presdestigatto]

by all these reactionary ferrari headlines you’d think that carlos has a 14-1 h2h record over charles so far or something but if you use your brain a little you’ll realise the number of comparable weekends has been 2. two.