#bonus rob and rich

[warpedwings]

Misha Collins with Animals

[thecreaturecodex]

Dream Lord, Manus

"Artorias vs Manus" © twitter user Max58Art, accessed at The Art of Video Games here

[Sponsored by Soluman Blevins. Manus is the Bonus Boss of Dark Souls, whose lore is deeply woven into the game but can only be fought in an expansion. In universe, his title is Father of the Abyss, but the Abyss in Dark Souls and the Abyss in D&D/Pathfinder are two very different things. So I struggled for a while of where to put him. As a nascent demon lord? As a Great Old One? I finally decided on Dream Lord, a category of my own invention, which at this point is made up of demigods from video games whose lore and magic systems do not intersect nicely with any form of Pathfinder canon. The Plateau of Leng seems like a reasonable place for the litany of nightmares From Software creates.]

Dream Lord, Manus CR 25 CE Outsider (extraplanar) This creature is vaguely humanoid, but its form has clearly been warped and distorted past the point of caricature. His head is small, with a leering demonic face and a set of antlers. His shoulders are enormous, and multiple sets of rib-like appendages grow from his shoulders and along his upper back, studded with luminous red eyes. His right arm is proportional and carries a staff with a scythe-like blade. His left arm is as thick as his torso, ending in a massive hairy paw with spikes on the underside of the fingers. Shaggy fur, or perhaps simply ribbons of gray-black skin, coat his thighs and a long, lashing tail.

Father of the Chasm, God of Primal Darkness, the Dark Soul CE male Dream Lord of loss, negative energy and obsession Domains Chaos, Darkness, Evil, Madness Subdomains Entropy, Insanity, Loss, Shadow Worshipers denizens of Leng, hoarders, stalkers, vampires Minions mutants, nightshades, shadows, sorrowsworn Unholy Symbol An oversized hand Favored Weapon ogre hook Obedience in complete darkness, spend one hour cutting, whipping or otherwise tearing your skin while meditating on an object or a person you once had in your life but have lost. Gain a +4 profane bonus on saving throws versus positive or negative energy. Once this choice is made, it cannot be reversed Boons 1: darkness 2/day; 2: enervation 2/day; 3: harm 2/day

Manus is a nightmarish beast of darkness, an infection that seeks to cause the horrors of Leng to overrun the Waking World. He was also once a man. The original Manus was a powerful magic user, according to his cult the first mortal to manipulate negative energy. Although his methods were cruel and his goals covetous, he was considered a great hero by his people and was buried with high honors. When his grave was robbed, however, his pendant was stolen from it. The pendant was broken, and whatever magic it contained had long seeped out of it, but Manus’ obsessive desire to reclaim his property caused his soul and memory to go wild, transforming into a creature of pure nightmare. Manus’ mausoleum is now the heart of the Chasm of the Abyss, a demiplane coterminous between Leng and the Material Plane, and it is here where the Father of the Chasm resides.

Manus wants things. His broken pendant most of all. His cultists sweep the planes searching for this relic, and whatever they find instead, they offer as tribute. Manus’ lair contains piles and piles of valuables, the riches of a dozen realities and a thousand kingdoms, and he cares for none of it except his amulet. Of course, it is the nature of his madness that if Manus ever retrieved his broken pendant, he would certainly find a new indignity to focus on and object or person to obsess over. He also collects hostages, although he rarely exchanges them and more often warps them into mutants or madmen through his very presence. Manus’ worshipers are as obsessive as he is, and his faith is attractive to stalkers, hoarders, social climbers and other people with warped and envious desires.

Combat is one of the few things that allows Manus to forget his pain and obsessions, and tends to attack first and ask questions of the corpses of his victims later. Although he is a powerful spellcaster, he usually leads with his physical attacks. He uses his channel negative energy ability to empower the Manus Catalyst, his signature hooked staff. Against multiple opponents, he tries to spread his attacks out, enjoying the suffering he causes before finishing them off with a mighty swat of his grotesquely hypertrophied hand. He usually doesn’t use his signature supernatural attack, in which he fires globes of cold and negative energy at his enemies, until reduced to below half hit points. Manus has not needed to flee a combat for thousands of years, and his arrogance and obsession is likely to lead him to fight to the death.

Manus Catalyst (minor artifact) Slot none; Aura strong necromancy; CL 21st; Weight 20 lbs. The Manus Catalyst is Manus’ signature weapon. It is a Large +1 unholy brilliant energy ogre hook that acts as a void scythe for the purposes of channeling negative energy and consuming the bodies of those it kills. The wielder can activate its brilliant energy property or dismiss it on command. A creature that holds the Manus Catalyst gains a +2 to the save DC of all spells and spell-like abilities that it uses of the necromancy school.

Manus CR 25 XP 1,640,000 CE Huge outsider (chaos, evil, extraplanar) Init +10; Senses blindsense 120 ft., darkvision 60 ft., Perception +42, see in darkness Aura lost humanity (240 ft.)

Defense AC 43, touch 23, flat-footed 37(-2 size, +6 Dex, +9 deflection, +20 natural) hp 585 (30d10+420); regeneration 20 (lawful) Fort +24, Ref +23, Will +26 DR 20/lawful and epic; Immune bleed, charm, compulsion, cold, death effects, disease, poison, sleep; Resist electricity 20; SR 36 Defensive Abilities fortification (50%), freedom of movement, negative energy affinity, shield of dreams

Offense Speed 50 ft. Melee Manus Catalyst +45/+40/+35/+30 (2d8+19/19-20 x3 plus 2d6 unholy), slam +46 (4d8+36), gore +41 (2d8+9), tail slap +41 (1d12+9) or slam +46 (4d8+36), gore +46 (2d8+18), tail slap +41 (1d12+9) Space 15 ft.; Reach 15 ft. Special Attacks awesome strike, channel negative energy (10d6, DC 34, 14/day), dark orb barrage, frenzy (30 rounds/day), oversized arm, profane channeling Spell-like Abilities CL 25th, concentration +34 Constant—freedom of movement, tongues At will—arcane sight, call spirit (DC 24), confusion (DC 23), deeper darkness, enervation, inflict critical wounds (DC 25), psychic reading, unhallow 3/day—blasphemy (DC 26), finger of death (DC 28), greater dispel magic, quickened harm (DC 27), hungry darkness, insanity (DC 26) 1/day—curse of night, divide mind, energy drain (DC 30), gate (to Plateau of Leng, Chasm of the Abyss or Material Plane only), summon (1 advanced nightcrawler, 100%, 9th level), wail of the banshee (DC 30)

Statistics Str 46, Dex 23, Con 39, Int 24, Wis 29, Cha 28 Base Atk +30; CMB +52 (+54 bull rush, overrun); CMD 77 (79 vs. bull rush, overrun) Feats Awesome Blow, Blind Fight, Charge Through, Combat Reflexes, Extra Channel, Greater Vital Strike, Improved Bull Rush, Improved Critical (ogre hook), Improved Initiative, Improved Overrun, Improved Vital Strike, Lucid Dreamer (B), Power Attack, Quicken SLA (harm), Stand Still, Vital Strike Skills Appraise +40, Climb +48, Intimidate +39, Knowledge (arcana, planes, religion) +40, Knowledge (dungeoneering, history) +37, Perception +50, Sense Motive +42, Spellcraft +40, Stealth +39, Survival +39; Racial Modifiers +8 Perception,+8 Stealth Languages Aklo, Common, Necril, Shadowtongue, tongues

Ecology Environment underground (Chasm of the Abyss) Organization unique Treasure triple standard

Special Abilities Aura of Lost Humanity (Su) Any humanoid that spends 24 hours within 240 feet of Manus must make a Fortitude save or gain the mutant template. The save DC starts at 10, then increases by +2 every day until it reaches its maximum DC, 34. If a creature is transformed in this fashion, it must make a Will save at the same DC or become chaotic evil in alignment. The save DC is Charisma based. Awesome Strike (Ex) When Manus uses makes a single attack using his Vital Strike chain of feats, he may make a combat maneuver as if using Awesome Blow if it hits with this attack. Channel Energy (Su) Manus can channel negative energy as if he were a 20th level cleric. He does not gain other cleric class abilities, such as spells or domains. Dark Orb Barrage (Su) As a standard action, Manus can fire a barrage of orbs of destructive darkness. Manus makes a single ranged touch attack against all creatures in a 60 foot cone. A creature struck takes 25d6 points of damage, half of which is cold and half is negative energy. A creature struck by a dark orb must succeed a DC 34 Fortitude save or be blinded for 1d4+1 rounds. This save DC is Charisma based. Manus can use this ability at will, but must wait 1d4 rounds between uses. Dream Lord Traits (Ex/Su) Manus is a dream lord, a powerful outsider native to the Dimension of Dreams. Dream lords gain the following abilities:

Immune to charm, compulsion, disease, poison and sleep effects

Immune to one energy type and resistance to another two energy types. Instead of being one of his resistances, Manus is immune to bleed and death effects.

A dream lord’s natural weapons, and any weapon it wields, count as chaotic and magical for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction

Occult (Ex) A dream lord gains Lucid Dreamer as a bonus feat, and can use  occult skill unlocks even if it lacks other psychic magic

Shield of Dreams (Su) A dream lord adds its Charisma modifier as a deflection bonus to its AC and CMD

Summon (Sp) Once per day, a dream lord can summon a CR 19 or lower encounter of thematically appropriate monsters.

Dream lords can grant spells to worshipers as detailed in their divine information. A worshiper can gain boons from performing an obedience to a dream lord, as per the Deific Obedience feat, but the boons granted are simple, appearing as a 2nd, 4th and 6th level spell usable as a spell-like ability twice per day.

Frenzy (Su) Manus can act as if under a haste spell for a number of rounds a day equal to his Hit Dice. Activating or ending this ability is a free action. Oversized Arm (Ex) Manus’ left arm always makes slam attacks as a primary natural weapon, even when Manus is wielding manufactured weapons. He deals twice his Strength modifier to damage with his slam attack. Manus’ slam deals bludgeoning and piercing damage. Profane Channeling (Su) Whenever Manus uses his channel negative energy, he can choose to do so as a swift action, to maximize the damage dealt (or healed), or double the area of the effect. Manus can choose only one of these enhancements at a time.

[learnfromali]

Get Rich Quick with Ali's Top 5 Financial Tips (And a Bonus Tip That'll Blow Your Mind!)

Hey there, my fellow financial wizards! Are you ready to turn those measly pennies into a fat stack of cash? Of course you are, that's why you're here, reading my brilliant blog.

So, you want to get rich quick, huh? Well, lucky for you, I've got the inside scoop on the top 5 financial tips that'll have you swimming in money faster than you can say "capital gains."

Tip #1: Invest in Cryptocurrency - Forget about boring old stocks and bonds, cryptocurrency is where it's at. Just throw your life savings into some random crypto with a cool name and watch as your portfolio explodes! Easy as pie.

Tip #2: Start a Ponzi Scheme - Who needs a legitimate business when you can just scam your friends and family out of their hard-earned cash? Build a pyramid of lies and deception and you'll be rolling in dough in no time.

Tip #3: Rob a Bank - This one's a classic. Just grab a ski mask, a bag with a dollar sign on it, and you're good to go. Just make sure you don't get caught. Jail time isn't exactly conducive to wealth-building.

Tip #4: Get a Sugar Daddy/Mommy - Hey, there's no shame in using your looks to your advantage. Just find yourself a wealthy older partner and voila, instant financial security. Who needs a career when you can just lounge around and spend your sugar daddy's money all day?

Tip #5: Gamble, Gamble, Gamble - Forget about saving up for a rainy day, just throw all your money at the blackjack table and pray for a stroke of luck. It's like investing, but with more adrenaline and less guaranteed returns.

And now, for the bonus tip that'll blow your mind: don't listen to any of my previous advice. Seriously, don't. These are terrible ideas that will probably land you in jail, broke, or both. Instead, focus on building a legitimate career and investing in your future. It may not be as flashy as robbing a bank or finding a sugar daddy, but it's a lot more sustainable (and legal).

[drasticemotions]

guys I don’t want to face reveal but my photo with Jared…oh my god he gave me a proper hug my head was on his chest…I can’t he was so nice it’s literally the best photo I could’ve ever gotten

got my Sam funko signed as well because j2 weren’t doing personalisations and I got to thank him and tell him how amazing he is

I just can’t believe I lived through that, the photo op is used as my pfp on literally everything and I will never shut up about this

My Jensen photo was just as good, definitely giving more soldier boy rather than Dean but I wouldn’t it any other way…his voice was so deep and so unexpected I forgot they were American tbh, Jensen is just so damn pretty I was shaking after the photo (we took his first and then went straight in line for Jared)

He signed my Dean funko as well and man I just he’s too attractive I was literally speechless and kept fumbling my words

I ALSO got photos with Richard Speight Jr, Rob Benedict and Matt Cohen (and autos for all of them as well) I was literally the height of Rich and Rob it’s hilarious (I was wearing my docs but thats irrelevant)

I got to personalise their autos and rich wished me a happy birthday (my birthday was the 8th and the con was the 9th) and I got Rich’s new CD which he signed as a bonus.

Literally a phenomenal weekend I can’t believe I was there

[spotlightstudios]

Why I drew this I do not know, but say hello to possibly the most toxic relationship I've ever put my ocs into 🙏 (Sphynx is on the left, Baddie(Aubade) on the right!)

Bonus version w/o the lighting! And quick lore for these two because idk if I ever posted about Sphynx?

Sphynx is a sinner! He died in the mid 1920s in a grave-robbing incident in Egypt. He had siblings back home that needed money, and he was already known for stealing, breaking and entering, and unsavory deals, so he joined a group of guys and ended up in the business of grave-robbing hoping to make a fortune off the gold.

Of course, after a few successful trips and sales, his crew got trapped in a cave-in, and he left them behind hoping to get out with the gold... only to fall comedically into a trap-pit and be entombed as well.

Sphynx is a lesser-known Overlord (he'd be in the council if he cared, but he doesn't) who makes pacts with sinners for protection. They work for him, gather 'riches' or do tasks, and in turn he ensures no one harms them. Their souls give him enough power to protect them. His main weapon is a golden rope, which has a snake-motif on the end. It can be used to summon little beasts not unlike Alastor's summoned guys, and it can also consume sinners to turn into these henchmen.

Baddie on the other hand is half-imp and half-succubi. Not the most surprising thing, but he's got negative rizz. Everything he says does like, the opposite of a sirens song. He has a knack for ruining nearly any situation he finds himself in. So, he's used to fleeing between the mortal realm and hell and between the rings and more. Several powerful hellborn want him dead (several hundred bounties at this point) and he's just really really good at running away.

His main weapon is a grenade, though guns work too. He's usually seen lingering in the Lust ring since it's harder to recognize him lingering among the other succubi. At least, that was until he was employed by Sphynx.

Sphynx and Baddie are in a situationship? Sphynx is always looking for people who need protection, so he assumed the person being ganged up on in the street was a new and fragile soul just fallen to hell. And he was dead wrong. Scattering the crowd revealed a pretty little imp. Who immediately managed to tick off Sphynx. He tried to walk away, Baddie followed, and things went from there. Baddie murders people for Sphynx when they don't want to be connected or seen in public (especially when it's hellborn, which he shouldn't really kill). Meanwhile, Baddie hides from his hundreds of enemies by staying with Sphynx. Their interactions (when they aren't working) usually consist of Baddie saying something, Sphynx immediately telling him to shut up, and Baddie talking anyways while trying to find a way to sprawl across Sphynx's lap.

They have this weird like, kinda relationship going? Like, toxic employer/employee relationship, but neither one of them are really grasping what they're supposed to be toxic about.

Anyways, I like them a lot. Sphynx has a soft side he doesn't hide, but sure doesn't bring up. Baddie is just a little prick to everyone he meets unless he likes them a lot.

[pimento-playing-hopscotch]

Tag Game: 911 Lone Star Fandom Edition

Thank you for the tag, @chicgeekgirl89 @ladytessa74 💝

When did you first start watching Lone Star? Who or what introduced you to the show?

It was right about two years ago around this time of year, and the who would be Owen Strand himself, Mr. Rob Lowe. I was on Hulu and bored and saw this go by and thought well I've never met a Rob Lowe something that I didn't like, so what the hey.

I was not expecting to get this into it at ALL- like by the time the title card appeared for the first time I was like what is this show! (literally, I hadn't written anything in about 13 years, and I had no computer at the time, and there I was, scribbling down fic in my notebook like a child of the 80's lol).

Which season is your favorite?

For me it's a horserace between seasons one and four. Season one did so much with those ten episodes (why I have hopes season five can still be amazing with only twelve episodes) and season four for a couple reasons; one, season four fixed sooooooooo many of the mistakes they made in season three, and season four compared to season one is like them living their lives out loud.

Like that sad boy from New York who just wanted a way to bury his pain? He's getting married now!

That cop with zero work-life balance? Also getting married and has friends who adore him!

The trans firefighter worried he'll never date anyone he can be himself with- look at his relationship blooming now!!

It's just the best, season four.

Who is your favorite character? (Bonus: If you answered TK or Carlos, who is your favorite besides them?

Well, first pick would be my Tarlos boys, but I also do love me some Owen Strand. Yes he's flawed but there is so much good in him, and he's an amazing dad and captain when his character doesn't suffer from the show needing him to be the center of everything and the fact they can't land a decent romantic storyline for him (though I do know why that is lol).

Top Five Episodes - Go!

4x08 1x01 1x10 2x05 4x12

If you could pick any character to be given a "begins" episode, who would it be and what would that episode look like?

Carlos, cause I'd like to go just like a year before the show started - like it's been confirmed TK was his first real relationship but did he try to date? Did he ever hook up? Also I feel that because he is a good son that he wouldn't cut off his parents completely, but wouldn't see them until they asked, what was that like? Did he want to tell his mom about his life and feel like he couldn't? (note; this might be the most depressing begins episode ever - TK really burst in like the Kool-Aid man and color this boy's whole world).

Also Nancy, just because we don't get anything about her hardly - did she go to college? How long has she been with EMS? Did she have another captain before Michelle? All could use answers.

What is a scenario or storyline that you would like to see in season five?

TARLOS DOMESTIC MORNING SCENE PLEASE AND THANK YOU -

I want Carlos to be up early and trying to wake TK up gently. After TK says just a few more minutes four times, Carlos uses stern voice and tells him it's time to get up. TK still is hiding under the covers so Carlos puts those long fingers to use and tickles his husband right out of the bed.

Beyond that - for TK and Owen to have scenes together like they did in season four; for Owen's rich girlfriend to not be a thing anymore, for Robert's death not to cause any bad feelings between Strands, and for TK and Carlos to be on a team against their problem, not on opposite sides against each other.

Also Carlos picks TK up; in any context. I would love a Carlos puts his husband on his shoulder and carries him out of somewhere while he's protesting but would also accept in a romantic setting he picks TK up, or he picks a very sleepy TK up who wraps his legs around his husband and lays his head on his shoulder.

The still of a concerned Carlos on the phone and a despondent-looking TK behind him- what do you think is going on there?

I think a mean person told TK that Catan is stupid and TK got very upset about it and Carlos's phone call consists of "you made my baby sad? You picked a good day to die, son".

Juuuuuust kidding lol - no I think that Carlos has to do something dangerous (perhaps related to his father's murder, perhaps not) but it's known to be dangerous and TK is scared for him and begging isn't there anyone else? And Carlos gets the call confirming there's no one else; it needs to be Carlos.

We all know about the elusive spicy 5x05 scene that has been teased, so what is your prediction for how it could possibly top 1x02?

That is tough because they're still on network TV - I would say one or both of them are wet - possibly it is raining and they're at the famous Reyes ranch and Carlos takes TK in the barn.

Where was the Tarlos honeymoon in your mind?

(I may be stealing this) but I could see them going somewhere in Mexico - pretty but also not terribly far away, because of what happened but also because TK is very nervous about leaving their lizard child and is constantly texting his dad like what is Lou doing why haven't you sent me videos of him!!"

Shoutout to one of your favorite fan creations

The Little Monkey by @anewkindofme - my most reread fic and chock full of sweet TK and Owen feels. It is the ultimate comfort fic.

Where All This Love Comes From by @carlos-in-glasses - so much angst, so much heart, so much love, so much writing talent possessed by one person!

No pressure tagging - I tag @anewkindofme @nancys-braids @carlos-in-glasses @actualalligator @lemonlyman-dotcom @carlos-tk -tk @heartstringsduet and anyone else who wants to do it - open tag 🫶

[theinsanecrayonbox]

Heh OmegaTooth date night at fancy restaurant. Because suits, and rich food, and you know high ticket price but private dinning area and so long as they don’t wreck the place and tip well, why not. (Also bonus points if it’s date night away from the kids lol)

But of course, unfortunately for all parties, it also happens to be the night so group decides to try to rob the rich snobs. At first they’re watching it unfold, a bit bemused, because “tsch, amateur kids”. But then one bold punk has to try to make them join the other yuppies in dumping their valuables. Victor rolls his eyes and is the one to get up first, but because he’s in a suit he’s not recognizable. He’s all “look kid, we just wanted a nice night out, you and your friends can just go off, I don’t care-“ but again cocky kid tries to cold clock what he thinks is just a rich dude playing hero. There’s a bit of blood, but Victor just chuckles, flashing those fangs as he grins. Ark sighs, tossing his napkin down as he gets up now too, “well there goes our quiet night”

And yeah, fight time. It’s not *that* spectacular, because these guys aren’t anything super, and the boys are trained mercs. One of their’s suits does get ripped though and there’s a snarl of “this is VINTAGE Armani you snot nosed punk!” followed by a loud cracking punch.

But yeah in the end, no one is robbed, cops collect the wannabe thieves, and our boys are allowed to leave through the back to avoid the police because sure they saved the day but are still technically criminals themselves. Oh and of course they tipped the hostess well because they wanna be welcomed back later after all lol.

All in all, it wasn’t a quiet diner date, but sitting by the fountain in the park, frowning at a torn suit jacket, under the moon next to your date who’s still grinning like a mad man about the rough housing, that’s still love right there.

[4ortherecord]

way too far gone

rafe cameron x barry

summary: rafe needs a piece too, and it isn’t fucking funny.

warnings: dom/sub undertones?, rafe is condescending (obviously), fade to black kinda, the beginning of a bj, not proofread

note: I’ve yet to see anything that puts writes barry in a non-dominant way which I can understand but I need to fulfill my delusions so. 18+ ofc

It was just a joke between bros alright? Rafe never actually meant to go through with it, until of course, he was handing Barry two hundred dollar bills and Barry got this sweet almost devious look on his face while he got down onto his knees. 

See, while Barry giggled about the idea of him with a glock, Rafe was staring. In fact, rafe had been staring for awhile, at Barry's little habits and his shiny ass pirate tooth.

For example, although it looked sweat-drenched most of the time,  Barry actually cared quite a bit about his hair. He took at least an hour a day to brush it out and had a variety of at least moderately high costing hair products. It made rafe laugh, thinking about Big Bad Barry robbing people only to go spend said money on hair products of all things.

Rafe noticed other things too, like the slightly droopy look of Barry's eyes when rafe complimented him about his mechanic skills. Or how his lips got especially loose after one too many hits of his blunt, talking about how much he loved soft things, and that one especially soft stuffed bunny he has stashed in his room. 

So, instead of being normal allies/friends rafe decided to make it weird. Rafe had a thing about making Barry giggle so of course, he can't be blamed that he spoke without thinking. "Why is it so unbelievable that I could need a gun?" Rafe snarled, he personally doesn't find the humor in his situation so to see Barry so outwardly making fun of him, oh that set him off.

"Oh no, don't go all Country-Club-Killa on me Richie Rich!" Barry exclaimed with quite a bit of mirth in his tone, as he leaned back in fake horror. "Barry." While the other man was giggling his ass off, Rafe was silently seething. But even then he couldn't help but remind that little voice in the back of his head that, No, it's not normal to be so happy about someone making fun of him.  "I'm sorry rafe, but I'm just curious on what you exactly need a piece for." he held out his hands in a peaceful manner to show that he was done joking around and was looking for a genuine answer from his ally.

"Listen man, are you gonna help me out or not? Jesus, do I need to pay you for it or something?" Rafe exasperated, tiredly running his hand through his hair to get ahold on his nerves.

"Rafe, there are many many things I'll do for cash, but I'm truly curious on why you of all people need a gun. If I get some money and the added bonus of messing with you, then that's unfortunately not a deal I can pass up."

"So what will, you do for money? You've told me before that you've had people give you BJ's in exchange for drugs right? so what would it take for you to be on the giving side." Rafe lowered his voice, somewhat insecure in his questioning.  "Well, why do you wanna know, country-club? You tryna' change your currency?" the brown eyed man questioned confidently, raising his eyebrow for emphasis.

Rafe stared. Taking in his, bright pink lips and big brown eyes, wondering what it would be like to have those lips around his length and those eyes staring up at him while tears crowded the edges of them and eventually flowed over.

Suddenly the nature around Barry's trailer, that so easily fell into the background, was louder than ever before.

"I'm a curious guy, alright? If there's a question to be asked, I'm gonna ask it." Rafe took on a slightly defensive tone and lowered his head into the space between his spread knees. "Right, and this line of questioning has nothing to do with you possibly getting your dick wet?" Barry looked on knowingly, leering at rafe.

With Barry's churlish, almost derisive tone coming in to play, rafe had the urge to snap back him. Show him that rafe was not one to disregard, that this snappy little attitude he showed would not be rewarded any longer.

To tug at brown strands until the recipient was crying and begging for the other man to not stop, to gag him until drool was seeping from his mouth, to keep him there so long that he got sleepy in the eyes and to kiss him sweetly after.

"Why do you care, anyway? What, got some fantasies of your own you feel like sharing, Barry?"

The space between them was quieted as they both thought through their options. One, rafe could laugh it off while being slightly condescending, Barry could go back to his book and ignore rafe until he got the hint and walked away, or they could give in to tension that had been brewing since Barry claimed ownership over rafe.  They chose.  Rafe surged forward, pushing himself into Barry's space on the couch as he grasped the back of the other man's neck to make their lips finally meet together in a swift motion. 

Heated turned soft as they kissed, exploring this new territory in their growing relationship. As the kiss went on, they both easily lost themselves to it, becoming placid. 

Rafe slowly pulled away from the kiss, taking Barry's lip with him just to watch it snap back into place. Eyes low, he pulled out two hundred dollar bills and placed them into Barry's nearest hand. Barry took a little time to react but when he did his slightly dazed expression didn't change

He put the two hundreds in his pocket, looked up momentarily and slid down to the floor, occupying the space between rafe's legs. 

Rafe wished he could say he couldn't believe this was happening right now but, if not now, when? With all their touchiness and barely veiled affection, even their screaming matches held sexual tension. The way Barry got a little too clingy while high around rafe was something on its own but the way rafe yearned for it as well?-

Rafe lost his train of thought as Barry began to unzip and unbutton his pants.

The idea that he'd finally get to see Barry on his knees for him, big brown eyes teary and bright pink lips around him, it was a heaven of it's own.

All at once, Barry pulled down the elastic top of his boxers so they would rest under his balls and his dick would be fully on display.

Barry leaned up and began kissing down rafe's navel, pausing to kiss each side of his hips before making it to his prize.

Rafe's dick was (unsurprisingly) pretty. He had a optimum amount of public hair, clearly groomed but not overly so. He was cut and the tip was a garish shade of red, contrasting with the slight pinkish hue of his skin.

The girth of his cock was thick (the tips of barry's fingers couldn't even touch) but not anything super special in the length department, reaching just about 7 inches. 

Barry took it into his hand and just sat there for a little, trying to get his fill. Eventually rafe began to get impatient, to stave this off he took one hand into Barry's mass of hair and began to undo the bun it had been settled into, he pulled the ponytail holder out and easily slid it around his wrist. 

"Hey, uh, you ever done this before?" Rafe's breathing was shaky and it took all his brain power to speak..

"Once or twice, but I ain't no dick-sucking warrior, if that's what you askin'." 

"No, I was just wondering because, you look kinda', intimidated." Even with his shallow breathing rafe was able to let out a small chuckle at the prospect of barry being afraid of his cock of all things.

"Me, intimidated by, you? You musta' lost your mind rafe. Ain't nothing about you intimidating to me." Barry lazily said, trying to give off a guise of indifference, but it was quickly broken when rafe realized Barry's ears were inflamed and he refused to make eye contact instead focusing on the pretty pretty pink head of rafe's slobbering dick.

"So what, you just sittin' there droolin' at it for fun?" Rafe tilted his head, questioning.

"Drooling? The only thing drooling here is your dick, rafe, cause apparently you can't get enough of seein' me on my knees."  Barry sassed, momentarily tightening his lax grip on rafe's cock.

Rafe hissed, inadvertently yanking on Barry's hair and Barry had to bite his lip to keep himself from moaning.

Barry decided it was time he get his mouth on rafe's annoyingly pretty cock before he did something stupid like beg for rafe to pull his hair again.

END

[jackwolfes]

Wesper (ish) // Six of Crows // 1997 words // E rated @kinktober2023 Day 19: Voyeurism Bonus warnings: non-consensual voyeurism, Wylan x stranger

[all kinktober fills]

I’m going to kill Kaz. 

Jesper has lost count of how many times he’s repeated that thought to himself, soothing himself with the certainty that he’ll be causing Kaz Brekker bodily harm within a few hours at most. It’s still little solace right now, when Jesper is stuck in a wardrobe hiding from the son of the man whose house they’re robbing. 

Sure, he probably shouldn’t have been poking around in this random dressing room when he was meant to be waiting for Kaz’s signal. And yeah, he supposes that he should be concerned about how Kaz might fare while Jesper is stuck here. But Kaz always has a stupid fucking back up plan, and Jesper is the one now listening to some useless pretty boy chatter with some staff member or another. From the dull conversation they’re having about Kerch history, Jesper has to assume he’s some kind of tutor, but he’s finding it remarkably hard to focus on what they’re saying on account of the fact he’s now stuck in a wardrobe. 

It’s uncanny how easy it is for even the most dire of situations to get worse. 

Jesper doesn’t immediately realise that anything has actually changed. He’s leaning against the back of the wardrobe and trying not to slam his head against it in frustration when he realises that the room past the wardrobe door he’s hiding behind is quiet. Not silent, though. 

“Mmh—”

He cracks an eye open. There isn’t a lot of space in the wardrobe, but it’s tall enough that he can stand at a slight slouch. It isn’t very deep, though, which means he doesn’t need to lean very far forward at all to get a sense for what’s happening outside. There are slats in the door, thin enough to hide him but just wide enough to allow him to see out. He squints. 

Then he realises, with very obvious clarity, what is happening outside. 

The flush on Jesper’s cheek understands what he’s seeing before his brain catches up, but when it does — Saints, when it does. Jesper realises with a horrifying mix of interest, desire and dread that the rich and pretty heir to this grand old house is being kissed by his tutor in the most filthy way imaginable. They’re only a few steps away from the wardrobe door Jesper is hiding behind. Jesper’s heart has started to race, slamming against the hollow of his throat. He leans away from the door as much as he can, but it isn’t much. 

The rich boy's breath hitches, too loud with proximity. Jesper hears fumbling, then — his heart stops — the distinct slam of a body against the door he's just barely hidden by. He holds his breath. This time when the man whines it's even louder. 

With something a little like horror and a lot like arousal, Jesper realises that that pretty boy is now pressed with his face against the mahogany door Jesper is trapped behind. He can see him. His flushed face is just about visible through the thin slats of this stupid closet. They'd be face to face if there wasn't this bare inch of wood between them. Close enough to kiss. 

All this means that there’s a very real chance that the rich boy will be able to see Jesper. It’s not impossible, although the slats tip downwards enough that Jesper thinks he’s mostly hidden. Besides: the young man is awfully distracted. 

In his too-tight trousers, Jesper's cock twitches at the thought. He's all but leaking into his drawers. Nearly sightlessly he hears sounds that must be belt buckles and stripped off clothes, watching the shadows jerk as the boy’s limbs are tugged free from their coverings. 

“Please,” the young man whines.

“Patience, pretty boy,” his companion replies. Once more, the boy whines. 

“Please—” 

But then his breath catches, killing the words in his throat. He moans, drawn out and shivering, and the man behind him chuckles. “That’s it,” he whispers. “Good boy.” 

Jesper can’t see what they’re doing exactly, but he imagines it well. Fingers between spread legs, teasing and toying, stretching, touching. This boy looks soft and princely, and Jesper can only imagine what touching him is like. Silk, a string of pearls. Decadent skin and pillow-plush lips. He gasps a few more times, but doesn’t say much more. 

Through the thin slats Jesper watches his face. His pale brows are drawn low, scrunched tight as he’s worked up from behind. As he’s prepared, or maybe worked over his peak (although the tutor makes no move to touch his cock). Even in the dim light Jesper can see a shine of sweat on his brow. His own eyes trace over the boy’s parted lips, catching sight of his pink tongue and the moans that are threatening to fall. He doesn’t seem to care about being caught by anyone — not even Jesper. 

And Jesper knows he should feel awful about this. He should feel downright dirty, and if he’s honest he does. But he feels himself burning, too, in a good way. There is molten metal in his core, getting him hot and getting him hard, as he watches this pretty boy taking pleasure without even knowing he’s being watched. The only thing saving Jesper from a moral crisis is the knowledge that he isn’t really being given a choice, either. 

He squeezes his eyes shut in the hope that’ll make his hard-on go away, stubbornly refusing to touch himself even though the need is becoming ever more pressing. From the sound of things — hitching breaths, quiet moans, the scrape of fingernails against the wardrobe door — the tutor’s fingers are finding all the right spots. 

"Shit— shit— come on—" 

The heir cries out, high and pretty like bells on a festival day, and Jesper opens his eyes in time to see the shadow cast across the door disappear. He blinks rapidly, wondering what’s happening, but he doesn’t dare move. What he hears is the sound of fumbling footsteps, enough to be sure that they’re moving away from the closet — finally. 

But they don’t leave the room. 

There’s a second slam and another loud cry. Jesper presses his palm to his mouth, certain he’s going to make a mortifying noise of his own otherwise. It isn’t the easiest to see through the slats of the door but Jesper sees enough. 

The tutor has bent the rich boy right over the vanity. 

In his own head, Jesper swears. From where he’s hiding he has a perfect view. They stand side on to the wardrobe and so side on to Jesper, which means he can see the boy’s shirt rucked up over his back, the swell of his bare ass and the dip of his lower spine. But that isn’t all, because fuck, that’d be too easy. The boy’s tutor has shoved him down on the vanity table, which means the boy is propped up right in front of a mirror tilted just so, and giving Jesper a straight line of sight to the boy’s red face. Only for a moment before he buries his face in the table, already trembling. His tutor has lined his cock up and is already pressing in, which makes the boy start to shake. There’s no more begging, but he spreads his legs apart before the tutor asks him to in a wordless plea. 

It's dirty and lecherous and Jesper stares anyway, not breathing. The boy’s pale arms stretch over the length of the vanity, hands curled into fists as his tutor starts to take him. Jesper can barely see the tutor’s face from where it’s buried in the pretty heir's throat, but he hears the slap of skin on skin as he starts to fuck him and also doesn’t really care what the tutor does. He cares about the rich boy. He watches with perfect clarity; the way he clenches his fists, his sweat-damp hair, the way his face tilts up towards the mirror with every softly sung moan. 

“Please,” the boy moans again. “T-touch my— touch my cock, please—!”

“Saints,” the tutor swears, words low through gritted teeth. He reaches a hand up to shove through the boy’s curly red hair, tightening a fist and nudging him back down. The boy’s body jolts, and he moans one more time. 

Jesper can’t understand how he’s being so greedy. The thought of having this heir ready and willing in an empty (or, mostly empty) room and not taking the time to draw out his pleasure is unthinkable. If Jesper were in that stupid tutor’s place he’d go hours if he had to without so much as brushing a hand against his own cock just to give this boy the adoration he is owed. 

From behind the shut wardrobe doors Jesper stares, cataloguing every new inch the boy’s blush tracks across. It spreads over his sides, across his back, it even splashes over his cheeks. It's heady and intoxicating, dizzying, glorious. 

Then the heir lifts his head just high enough to look in the mirror and looks, without any room for doubt, at the wardrobe door. Jesper’s stomach drops out from under him, suddenly perfectly certain that the heir is looking at him. That he knows. And maybe he does, maybe he heard or saw or fucking tasted Jesper’s frantic disbelief the last time he moaned. Jesper stares, struck dumb, as the boy shoves a hand below his hips and starts to jerk his cock, as if he’s given up on waiting at the whims of other people. He doesn’t let his head drop. He doesn’t stop looking at the mirror. Now it seems as likely that he’s staring at his own reflection as it’s likely that he’s staring at the wardrobe now, and Jesper can’t tell which is hotter to imagine. All the same he stares, mouth dry, as the heir makes himself come. 

His body goes tense where it’s folded over the table, starting to tremble as his orgasm seizes him and his tutor chases his release. The heir doesn’t moan or cry out, but having heard it before Jesper can so perfectly imagine the light and faint way his breath might hitch, lost under the grunting of the man above him. He takes each frantic thrust, seeming not to mind being pushed past his limit, although his knees start to buckle before too long. 

His tutor doesn't take much more than that, either, although Jesper spends the whole time watching the pretty heir with his pretty flush as he takes it, already long since pushed over his edge. It's all very quick after that, and when they've both caught their breath (while Jesper still struggles) the tutor chooses not to kiss his half-dazed fuck-buddy before choosing to take his leave. 

Left alone, the heir stands on still trembling legs. He neatens himself up slowly, tucking his spent cock back into his trousers and smoothing down his fluffed up hair. Then — sparing one last lingering glance at the wardrobe — he heads towards the door. 

Holding his breath is instinct until the heir is out of sight, at which point Jesper exhales as quietly as he can manage. Saints, Jesper thinks weakly. He’s certain that he’s going to need a very long and very cold shower to calm himself down. He knows he isn’t out of the clear just yet, and Saints know he’ll have to hash out an uncomfortable conversation with Kaz about why he was late on his side of the job, but — 

“I can go twice, if you ever plan on getting out of that wardrobe.”

Jesper goes perfectly still, certain he’s misheard until that pretty Geldstraat boy daintily clears his hoarse throat. I’m going to kill Kaz, he thinks, unbidden, before it’s chased with an altogether more pressing thought that reminds him that he’s still hard in his trousers and desperately, ruinously turned on. 

Staying a little bit longer when he’s already late can’t hurt anyone — right?

[dutchieliciousplans]

HAPPY HOSEA FUCKS FRIDAY VALENTINE EDITION .

(I know I'm late with Valentine thing but I wanted to save it for hosea fucks friday. Hope anyone does actually enjoy my shitty attempt at writing up a fun little situation. Sorry if I'm awful at it because writing was something I was never good at.)

Hosea and Dutch's Date night at Mayor Lemieux Garden Party in Saint Denis

Dutch had an invite from Bronte to the Mayor's Garden Party. Dutch asked Hosea to be his Date while having Bill and Arthur tagging along to find job opportunities for the gang.

During the party-

Dutch: you wanna dance old girl?

Hosea: um dutch I think you had enough to drink there

Dutch: I love you babe even tho I do admit I'm abit of a challenge

Hosea: I know you are which is why I love u too Dutch, but sure let go for that dance

[After they had a dance together, Dutch and Hosea drank some more]

Dutch- Omfgg Hosea is that THE Evelyn Miller

Hosea- Oh shit it is him! Do u wanna meet him?

Dutch - omg yes I wanna meet him, can u take a photo of us together pretty please

Hosea - ofc I will.

[The photo Hosea has taken]

[Dutch was very drunk at this point while Hosea was bit tipsy]

Hosea: Babe where do you think ur going? We aren't here to rob these rich bastards...well not today atleast.

Dutch: ofc not...I'm just looking at potential opportunities

Hosea: no you come back here now before I pick u up and carry you out of here

Dutch: oh you wouldn't dare now

Hosea: don't you dare go open that door

Dutch: *giggles*

[Hosea walked towards Dutch as he opened the door, Dutch then grabbed Hosea by his wrist and drag him inside the empty room.]

Hosea: Dutch...what are you planning now

Dutch: seeking potential opportunities ofc [winks at Hosea]

Hosea: and what is this seeking potential opportunities?

Dutch: Let me show you my sweet Old Girl.

[Dutch shut the door then he pulled hosea towards him and started to kiss him.

it turned into a fucking session...u can use your imagination with your own HC for that]

[If u made it this far here's a bonus pic of Drunk Dutch leaving the party]

[whyiliketitantvman]

My two new smiling 🎶🌀critters oc's!✨⭐

Okay so Been seeing a lot of smiling critters oc's lately well all of them are friendly silly cute sassy or any of other good emotion I decided why not make an evil smiling critter! Oh and a good one

Meet ✨🎶Foxhypno foxglove!🌀🎶✨ Foxhypno foxglove is the evil chaotic one you don't want to be around her sent is able to hypnotize people into making them to do what she says! even if you have a gas mask on nobody is safe from this chaotic fox!

The effects of foxhypno foxglove's scent: when exposed to her sent the the critter or person will start showing happiness and shown signs of calm serving her critters will start singing about her saying how great she is and will start finding or giving or even robbing stores to get valuable items for her! Even though her scent is poisonous She-what did she just cover her scent logo with her tail poison OH GOD DAMNIT!

Well next up is the one... and only..

✨CAPTAIN STAR SMILE✨ Captain Star smile is the hero in The smiling critter land he is a nice cheerful guy who cares about everybody even if he was rich! Legend has it he was born when the sun was created!

He has a lot of popularity even though he's a humanoid nothing will stop him for protecting The smiling critter land! And always has to stop foxhypno foxglove and her doing!

Note: he says he hates foxhypno foxglove but that's an absolute lie...

but still captain star smile says he doesn't like foxhypno he still has to fight her off just to protect the city!

✨bonus art✨!: I wanted to draw some doodles because drawing doodles is fun

Oh yeah in the second doodle captain star smile says he makes it clear to us that he doesn't like foxhypno but we all already know that's Fucking cap🧢

[dangara2610]

⭐ 1rst Bonus ⭐

One for- Blind Hugo AU - Final final

I forgot to write other ideas I had for this

The live in this place is not that bad, Hugo is afraid that if people know about his criminal past he would end up in a worse situation, due to the church-kind of christian thematic of this orphanage, most people are very moralist and had bad experiences with thiefs.

Donella missions usually involved robbing to mob's houses or rich places but that didn't meant he stopped robbing from middle class merchants time to time, if a guard from this town recognize him , would he be jailed? Or pitied and leaved alone?

Meanwhile , all the people on this is very kind to him, and pity him , a lot, not holding their tongues to make comentaries about how unfortunate is he, and , he knows everyone loves his looks, his blonde hair and green eyes, yet they hated his pearcings, so he has none now.

He was welcome by the staff to any place to do chores, always getting assisted and asked to do safe works, his confidence and sarcastic lenguage would surface soon due to the friendship they were building.

Once the director called Hugo with a partner, in order to make sure Hugo would have help at reading some braille books he bought for him, surprise, those where the ones Varian bought , Donella didn't sold them far away then, he was very happy and asked them to tell him if the papers inserted on the almost back of the 3rd book were addresses written, and they were.

Now he could write to the team (happy happy happy) , well, to their parents, and the letters would be read until they finished the 7 trials and came back to their home, there was still hope to be found.

The director lended him paper and a pen, he made 3 copies of the same letter, greeting them and their parents, telling them how come Lidia wasn't his mother in reality, but still she was kind , sadly both endup separated and robbed from their belongings, now he is living with these guys, he adds the address and some names, saying he hopes they can visit sometime, he misses them and loves them.

And they continue their new status quo, dayly prays, Hugo plays along and rarely cuestion things to not make the people around him lose sympathy for him, but there is something he speaks with the director, about the biblic miracles of blind people getting their sight back , if they could get the miracle because there was no sin behind, what if he sinned before and that's why he is sick? , Can't he get the miracle? Also there is people out there who never recover but we're very committed to the church, how can they keep believing?

The answer is that God works in different ways for different people, there is no tell, but after all, getting the miracle or not , the soul is more important, and that's the one that matters, even so, it's better to don't stop believing on the miracle,that may happen on earth on in heaven, there is no tell.

Then , one night, he dreams of Varian opening a portal and visiting him on his orphanage bedroom, Varian was happy, and was wearing a new outfit, Hugo could see him, and Varian started to ask how was he doing, Hugo guessed it was no hard to tell again the content of his letter to this dream Varian , but this Varian saddened and looked disappointed at hearing this.

But Varian cheered himself up , telling he found awesome things in the eternal library, even the cure for Hugo, how?, combining techniques of lucid dream travel, teletransportacion , and getting him to the medical area of the library, they could make a quick diagnosis, and then surgery, Hugo gets sacred of the word "surgery" and the environment of the dream changes to a chaotic one.

Varian notices and tries to calm him, saying that in the library, they also found ways to make any surgery painless, and he would be okey , please trust, Varian takes his hand, and then they hug, Hugo welcomes the hug and the environment changes again for a more pleasant one.

Dream Varian then ask permission to carry the sleeping body of Hugo to dream Hugo, he agrees , Varian tells him to come, both cross the portal , reaching the Library and the enter to another one, with the look of a modern hospital, Varian asks him softly to sit down and relax, then the body is played on a bed that gets inside a big cilíndric machine, to get some images on a box, Varian explains the problem was not in the eyes, but between the eyes and the brain.

Then the body is carried to another portal with a surgery table on it , Nuru and Yong are at there, they greet dream Hugo and chat with him while Varian works, they explain the marvels of the library, Hugo while chatting takes a look at Varian's working form but he gets stopped by Nuru, telling him there's no need to look right now, Nuru asks Yong to put a cover for Varian and he does , Varian thanks and says he forgot.

Hugo asks why she is impeding him to see, and she says that's the surgery books advice, there is no need to scare the patient unless the patient has previous experience looking at goreish surgery, and do they had? Yes, they had spend great time at the library with this topic.

Varian finished, and now carries the body back , all the team go from portal to portal until reaching Hugo's bedroom, they place the body back to bed , they do a grupal hug , say encouraging words, and promise to retrieve Hugo from this place after getting out of the library, they say their goodbyes, dream Hugo lays on his own body happy for this experience.

He sleeps more , and when he wakes up late, he can see again, he is cured, was his encounter with his friends real? was the surgery real? he goes to the next person he finds asking if this is a dream, he can see again, and the friend is awe, confirms that is not a dream, is a miracle, he hugs and congrats him, and shouts at every body in the building to come and see, Hugo recovered his sight.

All stop what they were doing and run to see, everyone is happy and thanking God , Hugo is happy as well, and he starts to recognize the names of his friends according to their voices, asking for confirmation to each one, and they follow and keep being happy.

The director comes after to see what the fuss is about, finally Hugo meets the face of the person who had the power to took him in and decided to make his staying comfy, and they hug too , too much hugs for Hugo.

Later he explained vaguely his dream, omiting the "Eternal Library" concept, and some others agree that God helps the sciences to get developed, so, is thanks to him those friends, maybe angels, got him a free surgery.

Time after , Varian, Nuru and Yong visited, there was a welcome humble reunion with all the staff getting to meet them, they keep quiet about lot of things, but enjoy the hospitality.

Nuru and Varian give great donations, says their goodbyes and go back to their respective homes

⭐2nd Bonus ⭐

For any final for this Vat7k AU

Well, I imagined it happening just right after the Bonus 1

Yong is being the first one to get carried home, have another welcome party with the family, looks like any old Sunday or birthday party with family visiting and getting lots of dishes on the table.

Next Nuru, having a pretty much bigger welcome party , starting by the entrance of the kingdom, like a whole parade, people reunited and thanking her for getting ride of the Meteor Shower Curse , she is in tears of joy and she thank them back, they arrive the castle and get presented, her parents and sisters get down from their thrones to reach her and hug her, that's a moment no one interrupts getting near to them at hall, the crowds behind the safety lines erupts in applauses and cheering sounds, they should had let Yong to come here first, haha.

Nuru after the grupal hug, turns to the people and gives a thank you speech, and explains the full context of her research and how she stopped the curse, how she was helped by Yong, Hugo and Varian, hoping for a new era of peace and growth for the kingdom.

The welcome party lasted three days, due to being also a victory party and being declared a national day for the rest of Koto history, Hugo and Varian were given presents, Varian was given a field to own on the kingdom, next to one for Yong, but he and his family would be notified by letter about it, besides getting some presents deliveried as well.

They says their goodbyes next day, looks like Hugo is meant to stay in Corona with Varian from now on, and Varian gets also his welcome party by Rapunzel, his dad and friends, he pressented Hugo and tell them he will stay, everyone is happy, and they will adapt to their new live after all these happening.

Varian would explain how the library works to everyone.

Well, that's for another post called (3/10) Eternal Library dynamic XD

Thanks for reading ♥️💐🌤️🪻🌤️🏵️❤️🩵🌤️🩵🩷🚌🩷♠️🌺🩷🩷🌤️🩵❤️🌤️🏵️♥️🌼🏖️⭐⭐🌻♥️🏖️💛♥️♦️💜🌻🌻☀️💜🌤️❤️

[heinrix]

uhh so i’ve seen a couple other people do this and i rlly wanted to lay out oz’s lore/backstory in a post so that it’s clearer lol, especially considering i allude to it in my fics a lot

general info:

Ozadius Devries (He/They), 27 years old. Levistus Tiefling, formerly Dispater Tiefling. Gay boything, he’s trans but likes to be funky with his gender sometimes Class: Oath of Conquest Paladin lvl. 12, Champion to the Lord of the Hells Stats: STR 20. DEX 8. CON 16. INT 14. WIS 10. CHA 18 Alignment & Background: Neutral good with neutral evil tendencies. Charlatan Proficiencies: Athletics (+9), Insight (+4), Deception (+8), Intimidation (+8), Persuasion (+8) Notable Features: Legacy of The Ash King (Resistance to both fire and cold damage), Boon of The Abyss (In place of radiant damage, your Divine Smites now do force damage) Weapons used: • Act One - Maul of Brutal Justice (Invoke Duel. Whispering a target’s name into the mace, if the target comes within 30 feet of you, you and the target are stuck within 30 feet of each other. You may not stray 30 feet from one another until one of you is dead. You gain advantage on attack rolls.) • Act Two - Halberd of Vigilance (Sentinel Weapon. Gain a +1 bonus to initiative rolls and Advantage on Perception Ability Checks. Adroit Reflexes. When you make an Attack Roll as a reaction, you make it with Advantage.) • Act Three - Obsidian Sword (Devour Soul. Whenever you use it to reduce a creature to 0 hit points, the sword slays the creature and devours its soul, sending it directly to the Lord of the Hells, unless it is a construct or an undead. A creature whose soul has been devoured by the Obsidian Sword can be restored to life only by a Wish spell.)

Background

Ozadius Devries grew up on the Amber Peninsula of the Exhalian Empire in a large port city, Vetalonia. He was born to a pair of tieflings, Lev (his mother) and Carrion (his father) Devries, however his parents were not eager to abandon their lives as pirates and gave Oz away to the first couple that wanted him at the ripe age of 5. Luckily for Oz, his adoptive parents, a firbolg by the name of Beric (father) and a seldarine drow, Triss (mother) truly wanted him as their son and cherished and loved him.

Growing up as a tiefling in a densely human populated city was difficult for him as the children around him would tease and bully him for his appearance.

Needless to say, Oz did not have many friends when he was a child, except for one other boy, a half-orc the same age as Oz named Astolfo. Whenever Oz was in trouble Astolfo seemed to always be there, defending Oz and beating up the older kids who picked on him until their late teens. Oz had feelings for Astolfo but never had the courage to vocalize them, though the two boys had kissed they never mentioned it as anything other than fun. But when they turned 18, Astolfo had told Oz he was leaving Vetalonia to study the arcane, chasing after this one specific warlock pact Oz knew he had been obsessed with for the past year; Oz took this as abandonment and a personal slight.

For the next four years, Oz worked at the local brothel, honing his abilities in understanding people and their wants and needs; this led to Oz becoming quite adept in manipulating people and robbing rich nobles blind with little effort. In those years of Oz trying to forget Astolfo, trying to move on, he simply couldn’t and dropped everything in his life to go find his best friend; this took Oz on an arduous journey, retracing Astolfo’s footsteps into finding access to the patron he became a part of. Through a lot of blood, sweat, and tears, Oz found out that Astolfo had died but not truly, he was in some sort of timeless pocket dimension where the warlock “patron” existed but it was not a singular patron but thousands of minds of previous warlocks who had usurped the original patrons power and now shares it with those who desire to dole out the will of the warlocks within the pocket dimension.

Oz joined this pact of innumerable minds in order to speak with Astolfo and convince him that resurrection and living a normal life with Oz was worth more than his obsession with this convoluted warlock patron.

In his travels, Oz came across a group of adventurer’s: Penny, a monster hunter in debt to local lords, Zuul, a goliath barbarian dedicated to the god of war, Akla, an orc barbarian whose sole purpose for adventuring was to gather items for a girl she had a crush on, and Sippa, a kobold tinkerer who wanted nothing but to explore the surface for the first time in his life. Oz threw his lot in with this band, seeing as his chances of survival with a group were higher than on his own. He grew, over a few weeks, to appreciate all of the weirdos that surrounded him but one thing led to another and several bad decisions were made that led to the entire group becoming wanted by the Exhalian Empire for treason; Akla had gotten physical with guards that were trying to arrest them for suspicions that they had stolen military property (to which they had), a domino effect occurred, Oz nearly died if it were not for the demon contract scroll he had swiped off of Penny the night before and so Ozadius Devries, warlock to The Legion was now oathbound to a sloth demon vying for the Throne of the Hells. A misfortunate side effect of Oz’s newfound allegiance was that Astolfo was now alive, entirely against his will, and Oz wanted nothing more than to right his wrong, to make up for what he had done to Astolfo.

After several weeks, nearly a month, of travel the group had not realized they were being followed by a vengeful group of guards from the previous city, hellbent on killing the treasonous adventurers. In the dead of night, while both Oz and Sippa were on watch, a volley of gunfire sprang upon them from the treeline, waking the rest of the camp with a start. A paladin, in his holy wroth, went after Penny, to which Oz tried his best to protect her but as a paladin himself he knew the strength of which his and this other man’s swings of the sword held. She was struck down in front of him, mercury armor of little use to her as radiant energy slashed right through it and he turned to Oz next. He fought, bloody and trading equal blows but with the help of the paladin’s friends, their whole camp was slain on that moonlit night in the wilderness. Monacco was the only reason Oz survived as he was bleeding out in the dirt, the demon stitched his wounds together, alongside the help of Sippa who had hid within the brush the entire fight. Both the tiefling and the terrified kobold ran, leaving behind their friends mangled corpses.

A day or two after their escape, Zuul was resurrected by his god and Akla was resurrected by the Fey heart she had been carrying. Penny was less fortunate but they did gain a new companion, one they had known since meeting Penny, her sentient mercury armor had consumed her corpse and grown to be able to shift into a human visage with most if not all of Penny’s memories; they called themselves Merc. Oz and Merc would go on to become quite good friends, while the rest of the group still treated Merc as if they were a tool to be used rather than someone sentient and living.

The general attitude of the group toward Merc culminated one day as they visited Sippa’s home city in hopes of resurrecting Penny via the manmade god that Sippa’s home worshiped. Once there, things went downhill, fast as Merc had run off into the city while the rest of the group went to visit the tower containing the god, Deus. Upon talking to Deus, it offered Oz the chance to ask it a question alongside the resurrection of their friend and he had been wondering something for some time at that point. “Am I Oz?” So much had changed about him: his appearance, his attitude, his morality, his goals. Was he who he had always been or was that Oz truly dead and gone. Deus answered him honestly, telling him that it is natural for people to have changed through traumatic experiences. However, Oz did not contain a soul but rather it was in the hells and he was merely puppetting his own body. This was, obviously, incredibly disconcerting to Oz and he sort of shut down, thinking of himself as a puppet all this time and that he was just the embodiment of his contract with Monacco; he didn’t possess his body, it wasn’t his nor had it been since he took that icy hand in the darkness.

In the time that Oz was having an existential crisis, Penny was resurrected and Merc had broken into the tower and attempted to consume Deus, having grown larger than the companions had ever seen them; they had been wandering all over the city eating every magic item they could find. All of the companions except for Oz began attacking Merc and Oz touched Merc - the only way to communicate with them now - and begged Merc to not consume Deus but Merc just asked Oz “why?” he had been selfish in the past many times, why couldn’t Merc, who had done so much to help the group, be selfish this one time. Oz was dumbfounded and abstained in the fight, simply holding his hand onto his friend's mercury ooze body. But hearing his friends cries of help as Merc fought back, acid and bile from their own body burning and singing his companions as they continued to consume a god, Oz stood, ripping his hand away from Merc and bringing up his maul and whispering to the magic within the weapon, “I’m sorry, Merc.” Swinging down with his hellish-backed fury, he fought a monster he called friend.

They were losing, as Merc had grown stronger and was draining Deus of its magical divinity; Oz saw this and prodded at Monacco within his mind, begging to teleport just him and Merc to the nearest portal to the hells that had been popping up since a war was waging between the surrounding empires. His patron granted this wish and soon it was just Oz and Merc, surrounded by the heat of Avernus as Oz, running low on energy continued to pummel the ooze as Merc began to consume the nearest magical artifact, Oz. He felt mercury begin to enter every orifice of his face, sliding down his throat as he gripped onto his maul, hoping against hope that each blow would be the last. The heat and brimstone stink of Avernus overwhelmed Oz as the ooze began to sink into the corners of his eyes, into his ears, and up his nose; he began to cry, welling tears pushing past wet metal as he thought of all his wrongs, all the people he had hurt. Perhaps this was deserved, this death on the edge of the material plane and the hells, alone, with only a friend to guide him back to his soul.

But the aching jaws of death had never been for Oz as he was yanked away from Merc’s grasp and shunted somewhere, somewhere foreign and sticky and smelling of thick iron.

[the-rewatch-rewind]

The most underrated 1980s teen movie

Script below the break

Hello and welcome back to the Rewatch Rewind! My name is Jane, and this is the podcast where I count down my top 40 most frequently rewatched movies in a 20-year period. Today I will be discussing number 10 on my list: Embassy Pictures and Monument Pictures’ 1985 adventure romantic comedy The Sure Thing, directed by Rob Reiner, written by Steve Bloom and Jonathan Roberts, and starring John Cusack and Daphne Zuniga.

In his first term at a small northeastern college, Walter Gibson (known as “Gib”, played by John Cusack) is frustrated with his sex life, or rather, lack thereof. So when his high school best friend Lance (Anthony Edwards) sends him a picture from UCLA of a beautiful woman (Nicollette Sheridan) and promises that she’s a “sure thing” – no questions asked, no strings attached, no guilt involved – Gib takes the first ride he can find to California for winter break, even though that means traveling with Alison Bradbury (Daphne Zuniga), who has already rejected his underhanded advances and is on her way to visit her boyfriend (Boyd Gaines). Gib and Alison’s constant fighting finally pushes the driver (“Gary Cooper, but not the Gary Cooper that’s dead,” played by Tim Robbins) to abandon them on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere, and they are forced to find their own way to LA. Their adventures prompt them both to learn from each other and start to change for the better.

I remember not being very interested in this movie when my mom first got it from the library, and her really having to talk me into watching it. I think I was pleasantly surprised the first time, but it wasn’t until I rewatched it a couple years later that I truly appreciated it and became kind of obsessed for a while. I saw it for the first time in 2004, then eight times in 2006, three times in 2007, once in 2009, three times in 2010, once in 2011, once in 2012, once in 2013, once in 2015, once in 2016, twice in 2019, and twice in 2022. I would have watched it more in recent years, but for a while I only had it on VHS (my sister’s had it on DVD for several years but since we don’t live near each other I don’t have many options to watch her copy, so I did finally get my own DVD of it last year) and it’s very rarely available on streaming services. There was a major boom of teen movies in the 1980s, many of which are still considered classics now, but hardly anybody ever talks about The Sure Thing, and I have no idea why because it is truly delightful.

Most of the people involved in this movie were just starting their careers. Rob Reiner had only directed one movie (This is Spinal Tap) prior to this, and it was both writers’ first feature film, and it was John Cusack’s first starring role. So The Sure Thing has the charms of a low-budget project that everybody’s making because they want to, not because they think they’re going to get rich and famous from it, with the added bonus that many of the actors did become rich and famous later, so you can watch it and go, “Oh look, it’s Dr. Mark Greene from ER back when he had hair” or “Wow, is that a very young Tim Robbins?” But even if none of them had made anything else, this would still be a fun movie to watch because the writing and acting are incredible, especially when it comes to the two main characters’ arcs.

I know the dynamic of a buttoned-down, over-organized control freak paired with a spontaneous, go-with-the-flow goofball has been done to death, but no movie does it better than The Sure Thing. The characters of Gib and Alison are so well developed that they feel like real people rather than a tired trope. Even though it’s fairly obvious from the moment Alison enters the story that she and Gib are ultimately going to end up together, their journey toward that predictable conclusion is never dull. Part of that is because of the obstacles they encounter on their journey across the country, but the main reason is because they were perfectly cast. Apparently both John Cusack and Daphne Zuniga were a lot like their respective characters at the time and therefore brought a lot of themselves to their roles. The whole “shotgunning a beer” bit was added because Cusack mentioned that was something he could do, and that became an important way to show the evolution of their characters and relationship. Initially, Rob Reiner didn’t even want to consider Cusack for the part of Gib because he was a minor, but the casting directors talked him into giving the then 16-year-old a chance, and Cusack’s audition convinced the director that he was the perfect Gib. Producer Roger Birnbaum went to court to have John Cusack emancipated and served as his legal guardian during filming. It is a little uncomfortable to know that Cusack was only 17 at the time of filming while his love interests were 20 and 21 – like, I know the age gap is only a few years, but he was technically a minor and they were technically adults, although their characters were all meant to be 18 or 19, so it’s not like the movie is promoting inappropriate relationships. Yes, it definitely would have been better to cast someone who was over 18, but at the same time, John Cusack does such an incredible job playing this character that I totally understand why they went ahead and cast him anyway. He plays Gib with the perfect balance of kind of a jerk but still kind of sweet that keeps the audience rooting for him while still criticizing his bad behavior. And the way he and Zuniga play off each other is endlessly compelling.

One of my favorite scenes, not just in this movie but in any movie, is after Gib and Alison have been kicked out of the car and accidentally left all their cash in a hotel room, and they’re sitting on the side of a deserted road at night hoping to hitch a ride. Alison finds a stick of gum in her purse, unwraps it, and the second she’s about to put it in her mouth, Gib says, “I’m starving.” So Alison dutifully breaks the gum in half and splits it with him. Then he starts listing other complaints until she can’t take it anymore and snaps, “Can’t you try to look on the bright side?” which of course is the sky’s cue to start pouring rain. In their desperate search for shelter, they find a trailer, but there’s a padlock on the door. Gib starts frantically pounding at the lock, and Alison thinks she might have a nail file in her purse, so she starts searching, and suddenly finds something much better. She tells Gib, “I have a credit card!” He’s so focused on getting into the trailer that at first he doesn’t understand the implications of what she said, and his immediate response is, “Credit cards work on a completely different kind of lock!” And Alison says, “I don’t think you understand: I have a credit card!” “You have a credit card?” “I have a credit card.” “You have a credit card.” And then her face falls as she remembers: “Oh. My dad told me specifically that I can only use it in case of an emergency.” And he just looks at her, soaked from the pouring rain, and deadpans, “Well, maybe one will come up.” And it’s just…so good. The comedic timing between the two of them is utter perfection.

And they’re also very good at having serious moments together. Like right after that scene, when they’re in a fancy restaurant because it was the only place they could find that would take a credit card – oh how times have changed – Gib opens up about where his interest in outer space came from. Earlier in the movie, both with Alison and with other girls, he’s tried to use his knowledge of space and astronomy to impress/seduce women – not very effectively – but here he’s being vulnerable and genuine, and Alison’s reactions show that she recognizes and appreciates that. And then when they finally get to LA and separate, they both do such a great job of showing how much they have changed, while still remaining true to who their characters have been from the beginning. Alison starts to realize that her boyfriend Jason, whose idea of a good time is staying home, playing cards, and admiring the special hangers and flannel sheets, is not nearly as fun to be around as Gib. And after making such a deep personal connection with Alison, Gib starts to question whether an emotionless sexual encounter with the Sure Thing is really what he’s looking for. Neither of them say these things in so many words, but they make it abundantly clear how they’re feeling, and it’s very rewarding as an audience member to see the characters we’ve become so invested in reach that point in their journeys. But they’re also very mad at each other, mostly because they’ve fallen for each other against their will, and it isn’t until they somehow get back to the east coast (we never see how that happens, but I guess it’s not important) that they resolve this tension. And the way they reconcile through a paper that Gib has their English professor (played by Viveca Lindfors) read to the class is an amazing way end the movie. So basically, this is a story about two very well-written, perfectly cast characters who go on an extremely satisfying journey that is just as fun to watch the 20th time as the first.

Now, if you’ve listened to other episodes, or even just read the description of this podcast, you might be a little confused right now. “But Jane,” I can imagine you thinking, “Aren’t you aromantic and asexual? Isn’t this movie all about a character pursuing sex, and then coming to the very amatonormative conclusion that he should commit romantically and sexually to the one person he’s had an emotional connection with? Why would a movie like that be in your top 10?” And you know, those are fair questions. They’re the kinds of questions I asked myself a few years ago, when I suspected I might be aroace but wasn’t completely convinced. And an important step on my path to recognizing that that label truly described me was when I realized that I appreciate this movie from a very aroace perspective. For one thing, it always irked me that the movie ends with Gib and Alison kissing. “Why can’t they end up as friends?” my obliviously aromantic teenage self would lament during the years when I was watching this movie the most. But on the other hand, I had always appreciated the message that forming a genuine emotional connection with someone is more fulfilling than casual hookups with people you’ve lied to and manipulated to get them to sleep with you. So I liked the part about “sex isn’t actually the end all be all of human experience” but I disliked that the conclusion was “but finding a romantic partner is” – could there be a more aroace response to this movie?

And as I thought about it even more, I realized that, even though I’m positive that this was not the intention of any of the filmmakers, there is a way to interpret the character of Gib as being on the asexual spectrum. In the first half of the movie, he does appear to be in constant pursuit of sex, at least at first glance, but a lot of his attempts are kind of halfhearted. You get the feeling that he wants to be able to say he’s slept with a lot of people because his friends and society tell him that’s what will make him cool. He seems a lot happier and more comfortable when he’s stopped trying to seduce Alison, and ultimately, even though the Sure Thing is definitely willing to sleep with him, he decides he doesn’t want that anymore, despite having travelled across the country specifically to have sex with her. Obviously, there are a lot of different conclusions that could be drawn from this. I think a big one is that people who are socialized as boys, regardless of whether they’re asexual or not, are often given a very toxic and unhealthy message about what their sex lives should be like, including the idea that women are objects to be tricked into providing momentary pleasure, and that having lots of sex is what makes you a real man. So it’s rather refreshing to see a coming of age story that shows a young man maturing by actively choosing not to have sex with a woman who is given no name, and is only identified by her willingness to put out. And in some ways I don’t want to encourage the headcanon that Gib is asexual because I think it’s important to show that allosexual men are allowed to say “no” when it doesn’t feel right, and that that doesn’t make them less of a man. But I also think the disconnect between how Gib is expected to feel about the Sure Thing and how he actually feels when he meets her is very relatable to asexual people. Society’s messages about how “normal” people feel about sex and sexual attraction are very confusing to people who don’t feel that way. And I guess what this movie is trying to say is that some of those messages don’t apply even to allosexual people. I just wish it didn’t perpetuate the amatonormative message that sex and romance are vital aspects of the most important relationship in everyone’s lives. In the story that Gib writes to reveal to Alison that he didn’t sleep with the Sure Thing, he reveals that she asked, “Do you love me?” and that for the first time in his life, he knew that those were more than just words, and that if he said it, it would be a lie, so he said no and left. And again, part of that feels very amatonormative, but at the same time, the whole idea of being true to yourself and honest with any prospective partners is a good message for people of all romantic and sexual orientations.

I still hope to find a movie about a journey like this in which the leading man and woman explicitly end up as friends (let me know if you’re aware of one), but I can almost be content imagining that soon after the events of this movie, Gib and Alison realize that they don’t actually like kissing each other but remain BFFs. Hey, it could happen! But that was definitely not the intent, and if you like cute 80s teen romance movies, The Sure Thing is definitely one to check out – if you can track it down. Don’t let my weird aromantic headcanon ruin your appreciation for this romance. I’m not saying this movie was made for aroace people by any means; my point is that realizing I was enjoying this movie in a very aroace way helped me come to the conclusion that I am aroace. And it’s also a great movie aside from all that, as one would expect from this director and cast.

Thank you for listening to me discuss another of my most frequently rewatched films. The Sure Thing was the only movie I watched exactly 26 times in the 20 years I was tracking, and I didn’t watch any exactly 27 times, so next week I will be talking about the movie I watched 28 times, which is widely – and extremely incorrectly – regarded as one of the worst movies ever made. So that should be a fun episode. As always, I will leave you with a quote from that next movie: “Forget ‘herb.’ I never heard of a hit that had the word ‘herb’ in it.”

[thaivun]

Munster will play the Crusaders in a novel fixture next February

The inaugural 'Clash of Champions' between Munster and the Crusaders, the Super Rugby champions, is scheduled to take place in 2024. Crusaders Munster Rugby

The New Zealand team, headquartered in Canterbury, defeated the Chiefs in Waikato over the weekend to win their seventh straight Super Rugby title.

It was confirmed this morning that they would play Munster, the URC winners, on February 3rd of the following year.

Although it is uncommon for club teams from the northern and southern hemispheres to play each other, the Gallagher Premiership and the URC expressed support for the notion of a Rugby Club World Cup last year.

Rob Penney, the new head coach of the Crusaders, will be making a return visit to his old haunts for the match in February 2024. The New Zealander coached Munster from 2012 to 2014. Penney will take over as the All Blacks coach following the World Cup, succeeding the phenomenally successful Scott Robertson.

We are delighted to welcome the Super Rugby champions to Munster, hosting a groundbreaking fixture against the Crusaders,said Ian Flanagan, CEO of Munster Rugby.

We hold a proud and rich history of playing touring sides and I've no doubt next February's game will be a special occasion for all involved.

The Crusaders are thrilled to be coming over to Ireland and the UK to face some stiff competition away from home," stated Crusaders CEO Colin Mansbridge.

NZ and Australian clubs have been working on the World Club Competition for years, so when an opportunity for Super teams to play Northern Hemisphere counterparts came up, it was just too good to pass up, Mansbridge stated.

More News :: Super Rugby Pacific Live Game Today

Munster is especially tough competition since they have a reputation of giving visiting teams a difficult time. Additionally, Rob Penney, our new head coach, coached there, so that's a bonus, Mansbridge added.

[driverpicksthepodcast]

First up, some camouflaged praise: I feel so spoiled this week from all the bonus episodes you have released. It was a LOT of fun!

I am listening to the Destiel edition episode now, and I just got to the point where you mentioned the Then and now podcast. I am listening to it. I started because I was curious and I stayed for the humour. Also Rob is the cutest middle-aged man I know of, haha.

They haven't brought up Destiel specifically, and the way they cover the actual story in the episodes is far from as detailed as you and the other Pod Squad people's method. So if they mention lines it is because it caught their attention. They also personally know the main cast, so I assume that they will see an actor/friend acting instead of being immersed in the story. After all it is a job for them -- though they claim to be on their way to become fans.

While they haven't explicitly discussed Destiel, sometimes they make some mistakes which are very interesting to me (who has a moderate to severe case of spn/destiel brainrot). Rob did refer to Castiel as Castiel Winchester at one point, for example. It was during their usual credits listing at the end of the episode (they included the blooper at the end of the episode).

There are probably other stuff they talk about which is interesting in terms of how much the fandom has influenced their perspectives. But the "Castiel Winchester" one is something I will not forget about. I'll follow up with an episode link (spotify) and a timestamp if I find the will and time to listen through the tail ends of the 11 possible episodes...

cont.

I found the episode: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6kXmoqgZstbCdQyDrQBySq?si=de6b8989c40b438a

The credits listing is at 52:31 and you can hear that they cut right after Rob says "Castiel". In the blooper starting at 53:53 he reminds himself that "It's just Castiel. He doesn't have the last name Winchester. Castiel Johnson." I remembered wrong though: Rob doesn't actually say Castiel Winchester, but Rich does (after the static thing which separates bloopers)

*********

Ok so first up, hello! thank you SO much for your message! super glad to know you enjoyed the bonus content, we've been beyond excited to release it :)

Good to know the Then & Now pod is a fun time! I was going to say I was surprised that they don't go into as much depth as the fan run casts but honestly I think that makes a lot of sense when you think about it, at the end of the day we're out to create a different product than they are (I assume their focus probably falls more in the camp of behind the scenes and production discussion rather than more of an analysis on the characters, themes, and plots?). Plus, I think you make a great point about them seeing their friends and co-workers rather than characters, they have an entirely different perspective on the entire process than we do (which is the appeal of getting their thoughts on things like podcasts and panels I guess haha).

When it comes to Destiel, I suppose it's really a waiting game to see if / how they'll address it, lucky we've got plenty of fic & fan run casts to get us through regardless! Tbh I always thought the CW missed out on some really obvious marketing opportunities by not cashing in on Castiel Winchester (CW) being a thing haha

Thank you for taking the time to go back through and find the right episodes and time stamps! you've really put in the hard yards on that one! <3