#bradley cooper one shot

[miravayl]

12.06.2023

#Mira-Marathon | MCU

Short film;

Name: Marvel One-Shot: Agent Carter (2013);

Production studios: Marvel Studios;

Director by: Louis D'Esposito;

Screenwriters: Eric Pearson;

Starring: Hayley Atwell, Bradley Whitford, Dominic Cooper, Shane Black, Neal McDonough;

Genres: Science Fiction, Action, Adventure;

Running Time: 15 minutes

The short film "Marvel One-Shot: Agent Carter" interestingly tells about the adventures of agent Peggy Carter, depicting her strong and independent nature in the context of the CIA agency. The film has an exciting plot, a bright style and a charismatic main character, but it may seem too short for some viewers. Overall, it's worth a watch for Marvel fans and those interested in the Agent Carter spin-off.

My rating: 7/10

[themthistles]

from is such a bizarre show. it feels like something released in 2009 or 2013 but actually came out this year. clearly aiming for complicated mystery stretching across multiple seasons but because of its cinematography and dialogue half the time i feel like i'm tuning into a walking dead episode

[allbark-no-bite]

mr. iceman, sir

icemav (wc: 1.5k)

summary: they called him Iceman for a couple of reasons. Jake is sweating under his stare. a snippet of Jake asking Ice to marry Bradley

warnings: none, mostly just fluff

author’s note: based off of the song ‘Sir’ by Cooper Alan. the first time i heard this song, all i could think of was Jake asking Ice to marry Bradley. thus this was born.

————————————————————————

They called him Iceman for a couple of reasons. 

Ice cold.

A lot of it had to do with his eyes. Thomas Kazansky had a stare that could freeze hell over. They were pale blue—unnervingly so—and bone chilling. It was as if their chill could seep right into you, get under your skin, turn your blood cold and make you a bit sick to your stomach before you even knew what was wrong with you. One glance was enough to bring a grown man to his knees. 

No mistakes.

He had nerves of steel. Nothing surprised him and not much got past him. He was cool and careful and calculated in all scenarios. He'd come face to face with a MiG and not break a sweat. Swing and he wouldn't flinch. He didn't take risks because he didn't need to. He just knew.

Even as a near retired admiral and many years past the days of when he was a young pilot in his prime, Tom liked to think that he still lived up to the name. Even if that meant making Jake Seresin squirm in his seat a little bit. 

The blonde aviator is looking a bit green around the gills if Ice must say so, nervously tugging at the too tight collar of his white polo shirt and glancing over at any and all possible exits of the restaurant when their conversation temporarily dulls down. 

If his husband were here, he would have probably placed a gentle hand on Ice's knee and told him to go easy on the kid. But Maverick is not here. It had been Ice that Jake had nervously approached and shakily asked out to dinner, his voice so tight Ice thought it was going to crack. At first Ice had been unsure of why Jake had chosen him over Maverick. Maverick was obviously the easier choice. It wouldn't have taken much to win him over, maybe a case of beer and a bit of groveling, but certainly not a high-end steak house. But the more Ice thought about it, the more he appreciated the effort. Maybe the kid was smarter than Ice gave him credit for. 

Now they're sitting across from each other at the restaurant, Ice picking at small pieces of his steak and pretending not to notice the young lieutenant's discomfort. Jake had picked out the place himself, a five star wine and steak house that neither of them had ever been to. Even Ice, who had a penchant for treating his husband to lavish dinners simply because he could, had to admit the place was a bit over the top.

Ice had shot an inquisitive, almost accusatory glance over at Jake when the server offered him an Old Fashioned without any prompting. Playing innocent, the twenty-six year old had simply conjured up a look of pure surprise, as if he hadn't been aware that it was the admiral's drink of choice, and then ordered one himself. 

Ice is on to him, but he can't honestly say he's mad about it. 

Jake: I      Ice: 0

Because he doesn't like being played, Ice orders one of the pricier steaks on the menu. Jake winces a little at the price. Much to Ice's amusement, Jake swallows back a bit of dismay and follows suit, asking for brussel sprouts as side instead of green beans. Jake has never touched a brussel sprout in his life. 

Jake: I      Ice: I

They make small talk about work, Ice doing more of the talking than Jake. He doesn't mind, more than used to making the best of work meetings that he doesn't want to be apart of. Jake keeps most of their conversation centered around Ice, asking about his job, which Ice is more than happy to talk about. With retirement closing in, he's gotten more questions about buying a vacation home than anything Navy related.

Jake pushes around the brussel sprouts on his plate, at least making an effort to make it seem as though he's eaten anything in the twenty minutes since they've gotten their food.

Finally, Ice watches as Jake seemingly builds up some courage, swallows back what's left of the whiskey cocktail in his glass, and then sets it back down on the table. 

"Sir, I'm sure you know why I asked you here."

If Jake was hoping that he would get off easy by vaguely hinting at where he was heading with all of this, Ice would give up the oblivious act that he'd been putting on all evening, he's sorely mistaken. Ice stares at him cooly, raising an unimpressed brow.

If Jake could disintegrate into his seat, he would, but somehow he finds the courage to continue.

"I know that Bradley and I have had our moments. We've fought with each other a hell of a lot, but we've also fought to be together, and I think that says more about how much we love each other than anything," Jake says, sounding determined. Ice doesn't stop him so he continues.

 "That year we spent apart after we broke up, that was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life," he admits. "I didn't think I was going to survive it, being apart from him."

Ice knows. He knows because he orchestrated it. The truth is, after the Uranium mission, Bradley screwed up. Ice still isn't quite sure of the details. He doesn't know what or when or who or how or why, but Bradley screwed up and broke things off with Jake a few weeks after the mission. After that, the worst thing for everyone would have been for them to stay stationed in the same place. So Ice sent them both halfway across the country. It killed him to send Bradley away, especially after he and Maverick had only just gotten him back, but it would have looked bad had only Jake been sent away.

 "And so I've never been more sure of anything in my life when I say I want to marry him." Jake swallows. "That is, if you'll let me, sir."

Silently, Ice waits a heartbeat. Then another. He stares at Jake, his fixed expression neither surprised nor relieved. He thumbs fondly at the gold ring on his own finger under the table, the one Maverick put there nearly twenty years ago. With his other hand, he supports his chin, index finger tapping periodically against his temple. 

"You know," Ice finally begins, removing his hand and sitting up straighter. "That no matter how many laws they repeal, what the government say is legal and what's not, it's still going to be hard. In this line of work, people are going to look at you different. They're going to talk to you and talk about you different. This kind of thing, it could very well change the entire trajectory of your career."

For just a second, Jake's green eyes dart away, suddenly interested in a spot on the wall. Ice watches as his throat works and his jaw clenches, but eventually Jake nods, his green eyes coming back to meet Ice's. "I understand that, sir. I think he's worth it."

"I'm not trying to discourage you son. But I've been in this business along time. So has Captain Mitchell. It's no secret that my husband gave up a lot of things when we went public with our relationship. Of course we were later on in our lives than you are, and so I had the time to establish who I was before we got married. Meanwhile, Maverick was doing god knows what," he adds, trying and failing not to picture the many many reports that came across his desk of all of Maverick's escapades during that time. 

That's besides the point at the moment. What he's trying to say is that he wouldn't blame Jake for being a little selfish. Ice knows Bradley. As great of a pilot as he is, that's all he's ever going to be, because he's okay with just being great. He's a lot like Maverick in that way. He'll stop applying for promotions in a few years, spend less and less time in they sky and more with his feet on the ground. He wants to settle down in San Diego sooner than later, raise a family close by to Maverick and Ice.

Ice also knows Jake. Jake, he's a lot like Ice. What's good is not great and great isn't good enough. Jake is ravenous. Ice sees it in the way he flies, the way he acts, the way he talks. If given the choice, he'd never settle. The kid would soar through the ranks if given the opportunity. But also like Ice, he'd give up just about anything for the person that he loves.

Jake has gone quiet from across the table, having gotten the sense of where Ice was heading with this.

Ice clears his throat. "But I'm not going to tell you no, Seresin. Such a thing would be hypocritical of me being that I am a happily married man. That and my husband and I are quite fond of you. We'd be happy to have you in the family."

Even though Jake is trying to conceal his bleary eyes and is making an effort not to smile too hard, his relief is apparent in the way his tense shoulders finally let up. Ice presses his lips together to suppress his own smile.

"I promise I won't let you down, sir."

[grayintogreen]

OKAY HERE WE GO LET’S TALK.

- there was nothing I disliked?? Like sure it had its flaws as all big budget spectacles do but the only glaringly obvious flaw would be if you liked Adam Warlock, which I do not. That fucking gold himbo twink was fucking hilarious.

- ROCKET’S BACKSTORY WAS SOMEHOW WORSE THAN I IMAGINED??? I played him for like six years on DWRP and had tons of headcanons, do you know how HARD it is for canon to be more heartbreaking than my brain??

- I’m so glad my animal abuse squick does not apply to CGI animals. If your animal abuse squick does apply to CGI, you will have a BAD TIME.

- The Rocket content in this movie was off the chain considering he spent half of it in a coma.

- I am always a slut for “your favorite character is the most important thing in the world to a villain and he’ll stop at nothing to get him.” So, uh, good job Gunn!!! You read me for filth pal.

- Love how “I’m lobotomizing my blorbo because no one else is doing it” in LitMoR reflected real life. Let’s lobotomize all my favorite characters.

- BABY ROCKET WAS SO FUCKING CUTE. MUMBLING HIS WAY THROUGH TECHNOBABBLE. I ALMOST DIED. Just all the baby Rocket. He is a sweet little angel.

- how the fuck did you give that raccoon a Philly accent my dude.

- High Evolutionary going down as one of my favorite marvel bad guys because of being OTT and so unhinged his own people were like dude chill.

- “you’re unreasonably obsessed with that animal.” BITCH ME TOO.

- I assume Rocket’s crying fit after Lylla got shot was Bradley Cooper and if so he and Spike Spencer need to go sit in a room and think about what they’ve done to my heart. People doing gut wrenching sobs with only their voice gut me.

- A member of the audience SCREAMED when Lylla got shot. That sums it up.

- love that Rocket ripped that guy’s face off. Love that he didn’t blow his head off. You left him to die!! You could’ve finished him off!!

-PHYLLA-VEL????

- COSMO WAS BEST GIRL. Her being so mad and distressed that Kraglin called her a bad dog was the best running gag.

- we got the first onscreen appearance of Rocket introducing himself as “Rocket Raccoon.” Bless his heart.

- When Rocket almost died and Lylla sent him back, my sister turned to me sobbing and said she hated me for making her like these movies and me through tears said “yeah I know.”

-We have not ruled out Asexual Rocket which was the only headcanon I wanted to keep and Lylla was RIGHT THERE. So I was concerned.

- I love how mean 2014 Gamora is. She’s the best.

- I don’t have a lot of thoughts that aren’t about Rocket, guys. If you want more thoughts, go to the person who isn’t obsessed with a raccoon.

[dear-ao3]

saphs song prompt challenge

ring in the new year with me and a silly challenge. any fandom, any genre. only rule is that you must use the song to inspire the fic. multi chap, one shot all are welcome. do as many or as little as you want, on time or not! doesnt matter to me. most fall into the angst/hurt comfort genre because that's what i write best but i threw in some other more happy ones

theres a collection link on ao3 for them here

all of these songs are some of my favorites to write to/about and i wanted to share :)

on each day of the month ill post some of my favorite lines/a bit of analysis of each song if anyone needs a bit of inspiration. happy writing everyone

the songs:

jan 1: quite miss home by james arthur

jan 2: lonely eyes by lauv

jan 3: dear reader by taylor swift

jan 4: my friends toyota by asiris

jan 5: montana by mikey ferrari

jan 6: girl on the internet by knox

jan 7: 3 am by matchbox 20

jan 8: jet pack blues by fall out boy

jan 9: love u like that by lauv

jan 10: line without a hook by ricky montgomery

jan 11: who says you can't go home by bon jovi

jan 12: just to hear you say that you love me by faith hill

jan 13: honest by the chainsmokers

jan 14: two by sleeping at last

jan 15: i hate your friends by alex cole

jan 16: safe inside by james arthur

jan 17: all i want by kodaline

jan 18: almost lover by a fine frenzy

jan 19: stick season by noah kahan

jan 20: if i could fly by one direction

jan 21: what am i by why don't we

jan 22: falling slowly from once

jan 23: the night we met by lord huron

jan 24: roaring 20s by panic! at the disco

jan 25: wonder by shawn mendes

jan 26: best years by 5 seconds of summer

jan 27: one way ticket by one ok rock

jan 28: falling by harry styles

jan 29: give me love by ed sheeran

jan 30: illicit affairs by taylor swift

jan 31: shallow by lady gaga and bradley cooper

[roosterforme]

I'm So Hot For You | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley makes you some homemade hot sauce to show his love and appreciation for you being his sexy nurse.

Warnings: Fluff

Length: 1600 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots! (But it can be read on its own) Check my masterlist in my profile for the reading order!

After spending weeks and countless hours helping Bradley heal after he had been injured, you really deserved something special. 

And now that you were going to be his wife, Bradley thought you deserved everything. But the one thing he knew you would love that he thought he could give you, was your very own homemade hot sauce. 

"Why are we here?" Jake asked him for the tenth time as he and Bradley donned matching aprons that said San Diego Community College across the front. 

"To make hot sauce, dumbass."

"Yes, I understand that much, but why are we here? I don't see why you didn't just bring Angel with you."

"It's supposed to be a surprise. You do know what a surprise is, correct?" Bradley asked him, like he was talking to a very small child. "Now put your gloves on so you don't burn your eyes later."

Jake scoffed at him as the instructor introduced herself to the class, and both Bradley and Jake settled onto the stools behind their workstation. 

"Hi everyone! My name is Miss Mabel, and I will be your teacher for today," said a very kind looking older woman. Bradley sat up straight on his stool, ready to make a treat that you would love. "It's so nice to see so many couples here. This is a great relationship building exercise."

Jake turned and glared at Bradley. "Couples? Relationship? What did you bring me to, Bradshaw?!" 

"I..... oh, shit," Bradley muttered, but Miss Mabel was already talking about different kinds of hot peppers, and Bradley really wanted to take good notes. He started scribbling down everything she was telling them. 

After Miss Mabel got everyone started on instructions, she started to walk around the room and help each pair individually. 

"You should have brought your future wife to couples cooking class, Bradshaw," Jake said, sorting the peppers by scoville heat units. 

"Can you just cooperate and help me, please?" Bradley begged, getting out a set of knives and cutting boards. "You know I can't do this right by myself."

Jake sighed deeply. "It amazes me that you manage to get through the day. Fine, I'll help," he agreed, handing Bradley the peppers in order of hotness to cut up. 

"Gentlemen, how are we making out over here?" Miss Mabel asked when she stopped at their table. 

Jake just shook his head. "Not sure, Miss Mabel. He's kind of a lost cause in the kitchen, but he's demanding that he takes the lead on this one." Jake held his hands up in surrender.

"I just wanted it to be special," Bradley grunted, dicing up a habanero pepper. "Can't I try to make something special for the person I love?" 

Miss Mabel just smiled at them. "Cooking for your significant other is always a gift from the heart."

"Yeah, well... he's being so grouchy about this. He keeps saying he just needs it to be perfect," Jake told her. Then in a hushed voice, he added, "But between you and me, Miss Mabel, his creativity outweighs his ability. And then he gets very snarky when things don't go as planned."

"If I get grouchy, it's usually always your fault," Bradley told Jake as he added an array of peppers to the blender. 

"You two seem like polar opposites! How long have you known each other?"

"Too long," Bradley grunted at the same time as Jake said, "Twelve years, Ma'am."

Bradley watched Jake measure out some vinegar and add it to the blender as he chattered along with Miss Mabel. 

"That's a long time," Miss Mabel noted. "You two seem to need to work on your communication with each other. I would definitely recommend more of my classes as a fun way to help you with that."

"Thanks. We'll definitely consider it," Jake told her with a wink before she moved to the next table. 

Bradley glared at him. "Will you stop fucking around?"

Jake just started cracking up. "She thinks we're in a relationship. With each other."

"Yeah. I caught that," Bradley said, shaking his head. "Now how much vinegar did you add? A teaspoon or a tablespoon?"

"Could you imagine a world in which I would slum it with you, Bradshaw? Hilarious," Jake drawled, settling back onto his stool.

Bradley rolled his eyes. "I would never date you. You are insufferable and irritating. That's probably why my fiancée turned you down. Now, did you add a teaspoon or a tablespoon?"

"Um, the little one," Jake replied, looking unsure of himself. 

Bradley tipped his head back and counted to five before looking at Jake again. "Bringing you here was a terrible idea."

"Yeah, mainly because it's for couples, but also because I am no better in the kitchen than you are."

When it was time to sample the sauces, Miss Mabel deemed Bradley and Jake's batch 'nearly inedible' and told them they should 'work on communicating and listening to one another'.

When they left the classroom, Jake checked his phone, completely unfazed by the epic failure. "Wanna stop at the Hard Deck?"

Bradley scowled. "No, I don't want to stop at the Hard Deck! I'm taking my jar of nasty hot sauce home and telling her you ruined it."

Jake just shrugged. "She's going to think it's funny."

--------------------------------------

When Bradley got home, you were just walking up the sidewalk with Tramp on his leash. 

"Look! It's Daddy!" you told Tramp as he pulled you along to get to Bradley faster. "Did you have fun with Jake?" you asked Bradley as he scooped Tramp into his arms. 

"No," he told you, placing a soft kiss on your lips.

"Where did you guys go, anyway?"

Bradley followed you and Tramp into the house, smiling as the sunlight hit your engagement ring. 

"Baby Girl, I just wanted to do something nice for you, but I made this for you instead," he said, holding out the jar of hot sauce to you. 

"What is it?" you asked, eyeing it skeptically. Even Bradley found the shade of orangish-green to be off putting, and he would eat pretty much anything. 

"Hot sauce."

"Hot sauce?! You made me hot sauce?" you asked, your eyes filled with love as you flung your arms around him. "I love it!"

"Well...." Bradley said while cringing. "Maybe you should taste it before you say that...."

He watched you dip a spoon into the jar, and the look of pure delight on your face turned to one of panic as the sauce touched your tongue. "What the fuck is in this?" you asked, coughing and gagging. Bradley watched you head for the sink, and he tried to suppress a laugh, but he couldn't. "It tastes like sour, evil vinegar."

"I'm so sorry, Sweetheart. I know it's disgusting. I tried my best. But the teacher thought Jake and I were a couple, and it was a disaster." He poured you a glass of milk and wiped the tears from your eyes with his thumbs. 

"Wait, what?" you asked, and Bradley told you the entire story. By the end of it, you were cracking up. "Oh, that's hilarious, Roo. I've got to text Jake."

"He said you would think the whole thing was funny. And I guess that's just one reason why I'm marrying you. Because you don't think I'm a complete disaster even when I am."

You looked up from your phone. "Bradley. You're never a disaster."

He shrugged and you wrapped your arms around him again. "I just wanted to surprise you with something you would like, Sweetheart. You were so good to me when I was healing, always making me food and taking care of everything around here."

You looked up at him and smiled. "I think going with Jake was probably your first mistake. We can try to make a hot sauce here. Together. If you want to."

"I took notes. Miss Mabel was actually very thorough."

Bradley watched you skim through his notebook before you grabbed your car keys. "Let's go to the farmer's market before it closes and buy peppers."

You seemed to know what you were doing, so Bradley held your hand and carried everything for you. 

"These are the little green peppers in my favorite hot sauce. Should we add them to ours?" you asked, pointing out some kind of pepper Bradley never heard of. 

"Definitely, Sweetheart." He watched as you picked out a few more. When you got back home to your kitchen, he felt perfectly at ease as you read Miss Mabel's instructions out loud and put him to work. 

Being around you was easy for Bradley in a way he had never experienced before. You laughed as he cut up the peppers and told you more about Miss Mabel's class. 

"We should go to a Miss Mabel class together," you told him. "Jake can just fuck off, he's not allowed to be in a relationship with you."

Bradley laughed and agreed, and while you blended everything together, he signed the two of you up for a salsa making class at the college. 

"Want to try the first bite?" you asked, offering the spoon to Bradley. He took a small taste, and it was good. Great, even. 

"Incredible," he said, and you grinned when you tried it. 

"It's perfect," you agreed, and Bradley played with your hair and kissed your neck as you made them eggs covered in homemade hot sauce for dinner. 

-------------------------------

Just a fluffy little moment between these two (and Jake)! One more one-shot and then we dig into another series with these two if you can believe it....

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@swthxrry

@chassy21

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@solacestyles

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[pippin-katz]

you may or may not be the person who needs to know this, but you're the only person I can think of to share this with, and if I don't tell somebody, I might explode:

so there are some similarities btwn Merlin/Arthur and Alex/Henry, right?

and like

Alex : Merlin :: Henry : Arthur

right?

so isnt it weird the both Nick & Bradley James are Libras, while both Taylor & Colin Morgan are Capricorns? and both pairs have a three-year age gap? and while they share the same signs, the 90s babies/RWRB pairs have their birthdays at the end of the month before their 80s babies/BBCMerlin counterparts...

just so many weird coincidences, and I had to share it with *somebody*! thank you for listening/reading!

Dude I feel you on needing to tell someone something or you’ll explode; that’s my life lmfao

Now regarding what you’ve shared, that is really fucking weird! Those are some pretty specific details for them to share. I’m not a huge astrology person, but maybe there’s just something about that pairing that works? Especially when they’re close in age?

Post Writing Note: This spiraled so far out of my hands that it smashed my plans for the day. I've been writing this since 9:30AM and I'm now finishing at 4:20PM. You have been warned.

Taylor and Nicholas

What’s crazy is that Colin and Bradley’s dynamic off screen is similar to Nick and Taylor’s.

While Alex is a loud and outgoing character, Matthew mentioned in an interview that Taylor is actually on the quieter/more reserved side most of the time. I was a bit surprised, but if you pay close attention, he actually does seem like he’s quieter than Nicholas. It's more noticeable in the draw-off video and their little promos with the teapot. He's definitely enthusiastic, but in a different way than Nick, who acts like he just took a shot of concentrated caffeine.

But you can also see it in the friendship quiz if you look for it. It's there in the way that Nick is more... I'm not sure how to describe it- maybe scatterbrained? Or ditsy? I don't mean that as an insult by the way.

It's like he has pent-up energy and wants to be entertaining for the camera, so he initiates most of the jokes and sarcasm, while Taylor is kind of just chilling. He definitely makes some jokes, but the ratio between which of them is the first to say something that starts a joke is heavily skewed towards Nicholas. He also randomly forgets what's going on, and goes off on tangents where he bounces from one thing to the next.

I looked and looked for GIFs, but I couldn't find some of the moments I'm talking about, so I'll just write them out:

Nicholas gives Taylor 10 points, and he's like "wait, wait, did I get it right?" and Nick's like "yeah" before immediately remembering that he got it wrong even though they had just had the conversation

Nicholas gets a question right and he says "point for Taylor" and Taylor is like "no, for you" and Nick corrects himself with "point for Nick", then jokes and points between them like "you're Taylor, I'm Nick, okay, got it"

Taylor asks the bonus question about the major sporting event in Indiana, and Nicholas starts randomly listing names, like "the Big Game, the Big Football Game, the Bowl, the Indiana Bowl, the Great State Champion Lacrosse Game of Indiana" instead of stopping to think or letting Taylor give him the hint you can see he's been waiting to say between laughs

Nicholas randomly starts being sarcastic or hyperbolizing his behavior when talking: - "Taylor is the one American person who knows where London is on a map." - "I believe you competed in [the Cooper's Hill Annual Cheese Race] yourself, didn't you?" - "I'll give him a point." Taylor laughs because it took a couple tries to get the right answer. "The points, they are bountiful and plenty. We don't have to be stingy with them."

Nicholas describing a corndog by holding an invisible "weird thing that goes on a stick" and pretending to eat it while going "nhgnhgnhgnhg" as he spins it.

He also reacts more to Taylor getting questions wrong than Taylor reacts to him getting questions wrong. There's the whole bit about the "chip butty" and "English fry-up" that leaves Nicholas acting all annoyed, whereas Taylor sort of just starts immediately helping him with hints when he gets something wrong.

Basically, Nicholas probably has some form of ADHD and it seems to manifest as hyperactivity. Nicholas being so hyper and enthusiastic is ironic considering how quiet and calm Henry is as a character. It's such a drastic contrast between them.

Taylor is much more chill. He's definitely hyper around Nick, but there is a difference in them. Notice how Taylor just watches Nick do his silly intro, but Nicholas starts making movements with his hands and expressions during Taylor's. Also Taylor was talking completely normally until then, when he ended up doing the point at the end.

Similarly, Nick is the one who starts chanting USA, and Taylor joins in. We obviously see the difference when they each summarize the film. Nick is basically a hamster in a ball speeding across a room with how he tells it, and Taylor simplifies it a ton and delivers it monotone; yes, it's a joke, but it still highlights the contrast.

Bradley & Colin

I'm using past tense with Bradley and Colin because we only have videos of them from over a decade ago, so they've definitely changed since then.

The thing is, Colin was funny and vocal, but there were a lot of times where he got quiet, and he always felt more reserved, in the sense of there being more to him than what he's showing. He seemed to have a lot of layers to him that you didn't get to see unless you actually got close to him, if that makes sense.

I wouldn't call him quiet, but like in the video diaries and interviews of him and Bradley, he always seemed much calmer than him.

Colin was always very funny, but he was also self conscious. During one of the behind the scenes quest videos, Bradley talked about how he and Colin would create songs together, but whenever he wanted to show someone, Colin was dead silent. Bradley actually turned to him as was like, "What, is it stage fright?" and Colin is like, "I don't know what you're talking about." in a way that clearly shows he's deflecting the question because he's nervous or embarrassed. Bradley pointed and was like, "And that right there is a perfect example of what I mean".

Merlin is very bright and outgoing (at least before he develops depression in later seasons 🥲). He basically had no shame about most things. When he met Gwen while in the stocks and covered in food, he acts completely normally, like there's nothing weird about it. Obviously, this boy waltzed into Camelot and called the fucking prince a prat to his face. He was really bold and openhearted. Colin always felt more closed off, even though he wasn't always quiet.

What's crazy is that Arthur is much more refined and serious than Bradley. It's not to say Arthur is never silly or unserious, because he is, but his default mode is very composed because he's a prince and later a king. Bradley was like a fucking hurricane behind the scenes. He was know for driving everyone a little crazy because he was so hyper. He got his video camera taken away cause he was apparently being too annoying to the rest of the cast and crew.

Wrap-Up

Here's similarities I thought of in a rapid fire list, including what you said and what I covered:

The brunettes are both the "quieter" or "calmer" of the two.

The blonds both play a prince.

The brunettes both play a character who came from a place of humble beginnings.

The brunettes' characters are both usually the one to start the insults/banter.

The blonds are the more vocal of the two about their affections and admiration for the other.

The blonds are both Libras.

The brunettes are both Capricorns.

The age gap is the same for both pairs: 3 years.

I am going to make an entire post dedicated to the similarities between Bradley, Colin, and Merthur, and Taylor, Nicholas, and FirstPrince, because I have more, but it was getting more into the characters' so I'll save those for later.

What was that you were saying about needing to tell someone something or you would explode again? Nah, not me, could never have that problem. I'm so normal about this.

Thank you for sharing, I have no idea what to do with this information, but I am glad I have it. It will now haunt me 😂

[sgiandubh]

Hola de nuevo, soy el anon rebelde con el traductor.

Nueva foto de Cait en Getty, de momento sola. Tony ya hizo su aparición mensual para justificar el cheque.

Si entiendes algo de lenguaje corporal observarás como la sonrisa de Cait es mas relajada con las chicas que con su lo que sea, porque aparecer con el creo que le produce alguna alergia cutánea que se refleja en su visible incomodidad. 💯

Dear (returning) Anon Rebelde (me parece mejor que Dumber Anon, así que cambiamos),

De antemano, la traducción:

'Hello again, I am the Anon struggling with Google Translate.

New pic of C available on Getty, for the moment all by herself. Tony already made his monthly apparition, justifying his paycheck.

If you understand anything about body language, you'd notice how her smile is more relaxed with those women than when she's with her whatever he is, because being spotted in public with him probably triggers some rash or skin reaction which comes across as her being visibly uneasy.'

Anon, I think you mean this lovely pic, taken today in London by the same photographer (Dave Bennett), on behalf of Netflix, at a lunch for Bradley Cooper and Carey Mulligan, hosted by Charles Finch, to celebrate 'Maestro' (hahahahaha - ok, I'll stop). A movie she has nothing to do with:

The venue, Maison Assouline at Piccadilly, is one of those sophisticated bookshop-cum-bar-cum-function rooms affairs. Typical C. - she was there in her element and it shows.

I wish and pray all the Greek Gods she would ditch that madre superiora of the Ursulines accoutrement. It makes her look way older and way more austere than she really is. But as I already told @arakanui1 in the comments thread of another post, I suppose she finds this champagne socialist look (' oh, I am reading Uzbek novels of destitution and loss and I am eating only on unbleached banana leaves') very telling and representative of herself as a Serious Actress. I still idiotically hope that funny and bubbly girl hasn't been killed by this matronly, forbidding public persona.

I agree with all the rest. And since you've mentioned a movie currently on Netflix, may I recommend the best Greek series ever made, also on Netflix? It's called Maestro in Blue, is absolutely flawless and features the still very bankable (and totally my type) Christoforos Papakaliatis being 🧨with the much younger and angelic blonde Klelia Andriolatou, somewhere on a beach on the magical island of Paxos.

Oh, and it's been renewed for a second season, I think they shot already most of it in Corfu.

Drop by anytime, Anon Rebelde! Thank you!

[earlgreytea68]

Heaven, Iowa.. if ur willing/have the time! Would love to hear some thoughts 💜

I loooooove Heaven, Iowa. I know Pete says this is a song about drinking a screwtop bottle of wine and driving off a cliff, but this is a song about drinking a screwtop bottle of wine and being in love, and staying there, in your own little bubble. That's how I read this song. It's one of those classic FOB songs with classic Pete Wentz lyrics working on one level with a perfectly expected and stereotypical interpretation and simultaneously working on a whole other level that deepens and complicates the entire narrative of the song.

Okay, so, first, that opening line: 6 AM, Mulholland Drive, "Moonlight Sonata" and I. First of all, shut up, this is so evocative in so few syllables and it kills me. Second of all, as others have pointed out, it should grammatically be "Moonlight Sonata and me," probably, unless it's intended to be the beginning of a sentence, and that's actually how I read the whole first few lines, as cut-off sentences.

Moonlight Sonata and I --

(wait, hang on, let me try this again):

First movement, you and I and a screwtop bottle of wine --

The use of the pronoun "I" instead of "me" in those phrases implies the beginning of a sentence, but the end of the sentence never comes, you never hit a verb. To me, it's like the speaker is so full of feelings that they can't be articulated, he's speaking in snatches.

Also, "first movement" is so clever, hahaha, the first eleventy million times I listened to this song, I thought it was a clever Moonlight Sonata reference, you know, first movement of the Moonlight Sonata, and then I wrote that fic based on these lyrics and Pete's sitting in the car in the fic debating making the first move and I suddenly was like, "omg first movement," like, it can also be making the first move required, who makes it, you and I and a screwtop bottle of wine will help move things along. Ugh, he's so smart about such silly little things like that all the time.

ANYWAY, then you come to honestly the sexiest image on the whole album: "I've unspooled on the floor." Ugh Pete. This always makes me think of the whole meme about how bisexual people can't sit in chairs normally. Pete totally would just sprawl out on the floor while he drinks wine. (I often write Pete sitting on the floor on my fics and now you're going to notice that, now that I've said it.) Also, though, "unspooled" is just a great poetic word there, you have an exact image of falling-apart-ness and letting-go-ness that no other word would have achieved. It connotes the unraveling of something that is ordinarily tightly wound -- that is supposed to be tightly wound -- and the unraveling causes a special kind of tangled mess, but also a loose sense of release.

"I feel so A Star Is Born" is a lot, given the plot about discovering and encouraging an incredibly talented, younger singer by a person who's already kind of a big shot. So there's that. Also the fact that Pete when writing these lyrics was around the same age as the Bradley Cooper character in the film, which makes this line feel about wondering about reputational decline and artistic legacy (which Pete thinks a lot about in his lyrics, anyway, but never in quite as tragic terms as this). The "would you read my eulogy" line fits with that "Star Is Born" reference: I'm not worth it, but will you tell everyone good things about me when I'm gone? Which also connects to: Tell me when the party ends, will you still love who I am? WHICH ALSO, in the mythology of Fall Out Boy, is a weighted metaphor anyway. In Pete lyrics, the party is often life, with the afterlife taking the place of the afterparty, so this can be another death reference. But also, inevitably parties ending make you think about "Where Did the Party Go?," and so then this becomes a hiatus reference: "When everything is stripped away and it's just us, do you still love me then?"

"I will never ask you for anything except to dream sweet of me," is just a straight-up line from a love song, which is important, because to me this entire song is a love song, and that line betrays it so very clearly. The speaker is never, ever alone in this song, there is constantly a "you and I," someone to kiss his cheek, someone to read his eulogy, someone there after the party ends. (Even when there's not a someone, there's the Moonlight Sonata still with him, and I'll get to that later.)

The chorus is "Scar-crossed lovers." I've seen people talk about how emo and goth an image that is, and I get it. The "scar" reference seems like it makes it emo-er than the usual saying, which is "star-crossed." So on one level, sure, how Pete Wentz to turn the word "star" into "scar," of course, once an emo, always an emo, etc. But I actually think changing "star" to "scar" converts a hopeless saying into a hopeful one. Because "star-crossed lovers" means lovers who can't hold it together. The original star-crossed lovers were Romeo and Juliet. Certainly not a happy ending for them. But these in this song are not star-crossed lovers. They are scar-crossed. Scars are actually healing. They are the body's kintsugi, to use a reference from another song. If you've got a scar, sure, it means you've been through something, but what it really means is you got through it. You came out the other side and you healed. These are not lovers who can't get it together. These are lovers who came out on the other side of the apocalypse.

The same multi-layered meaning exists in the next line: "I'm checking myself out forever." Sure, on one level, this sounds negative: I am gone, I'm leaving. But the thing is: What is he leaving? It's actually not entirely clear. I don't think it's the relationship he's leaving. I think it's the rest of the world. And not in a bad and depressing way. He's like, "Look, I have found something real here. You see all this nonsense, all this chaos, all this drama? I am checking myself out of all of this forever." This goes nicely with the next line: "I'm saving this all for later," which can also be read on two levels, one being, "I'm checking out of this nonsense, I'll deal with it later, I'm staying in my bubble with my love." Another being, "I am here in this bubble with my love and I am going to remember every second of this." After all, "save for later" means something you want to make sure you return to. That line, "Here we are untouched forever" also supports a positive reading of the relationship. It could be read as, "Now we no longer exist, we are only enduring in my memory," but...nowhere in the song does that seem true of this relationship. The relationship is very present throughout the song. When he says "here we are untouched forever," I think he's talking about this bubble he's retreated into, away from the rest of the world.

And that reading goes into the second verse, too, where he refers to himself as being "gone like this." This could be read as really dark, given the Star Is Born reference. But it could also be read as: I have checked out of everything and I am holed up with my love and just everyone wait to see how much they're going to miss how much I was doing and holding together. "Talking to the mirror," (I am the invisible man...) -- "Half your life you've been hooked on death." This seems like an obvious reference to Pete Wentz's reputation, but it's in quotes, like he's quoting other people, like he's telling himself, reminding himself what people think of him. Because that's not who he is.

This last bit of the second verse is so fascinating to me. "Twice the dreams, but half the love, be careful what you bottle up, the chemistry is a mess it seems," these are all negative images and negative lines, warnings and self-recriminations. And then there's that unexpected "But me, I'm still a sunbeam." Patrick is usually the sun in Pete's lyrics, the sun is usually something outside of Pete. How shocking and strange for Pete to suddenly write that he's the sunbeam, and for Patrick to give it a melodic flourish to boot. That could be Patrick giving that to him: "Don't worry about your chemistry, you're definitely loved." BUT, it could also be Pete finally, finally internalizing what Patrick says to him all the time: "YOU'RE the sunbeam. It isn't me. It doesn't matter how you feel like you're too much, it doesn't matter how much you feel like you bottle up, it doesn't matter how much you feel like a mess, you're still amazing, you're still a sunbeam." Ugh, the amount of healing in this song. Scar-crossed, indeed. The bridge could be read as flipped, from Patrick's perspective, and that works, but, tbh, that bridge can also be read as Pete closing his eyes inside the bubble he's created with his love, and there's darkness in this, but the love's glow is right there, so soothing, leading him home, a beacon. When Pete closes his eyes and shuts the rest of the world out -- there, there's the glow, giving him that little shove he needs to keep going: Shake things up, see what comes down, write another album with me, send me some words, we've got this.

This song rises to unbelievable heights by the end of it, like, it is sonically overwhelming, but then it loops around to the same soft rhyme as the beginning, Patrick crooning once again. It begins and ends with the speaker and music. In the end, the thing that has always been there for them: the music.

Also, the fact that Moonlight Sonata is the reference is so interesting in the context of Patrick being the sun in Pete's lyrics. If Patrick is the sun, that makes Pete the moon, catching his reflected glory. Moonlight Sonata, indeed.

This song is full of yearning, but at no point do I feel sad for this guy. He's gonna be okay. His love is right there with him when the party ends.

[offside-the-lines]

Lord Stanley's BINGO Daily Report

What a day in playoffs! Lots to report. But first, a quick note: The primary purpose of the bingo is to have fun! So, the daily report is only a list of what @imperatorrrrr and I think are cross-off-able items according to our judgement. If you have different interpretations of the items, that is okay! You are welcome to disagree with us and cross off whatever you think should be crossed off. That being said, if you think we missed something, you are still encouraged to let us know. Now, that being said, happy bingo-ing.

Round 1 — Apr 21, 2024 ✔️ Team has fewer than 20 shots in one game (TBL 19 SOG, TBL - FLA Gm 1) ✔️ Someone fumbles the national anthem (TBL - FLA Gm 1) ✔️ Celebrity spotted at a game (Bradley Cooper at WSH - NYR Gm 1) ✔️ 10+ goals scored in total in one game (COL 6 - 7 WPG, Gm 1) ✔️ Team has more than 40 shots in one game (Avs 46 SOG, COL - WPG Gm 1)

Want to join in the fun? Use this link to auto-generate your own card. Once you have generated a card, make sure you save it as it will generate a new card every time you click the link. Feel free to generate multiple cards! If you make posts, please tag us or '#2k24 nhl playoff bingo' so we can keep up with your progress!!!

[thatsparrow]

post-honor among thieves thoughts

a delight!!

truly, a fun fantasy film with all the right blends of serious stakes and goofy missteps that is so emblematic of playing dnd

one of the things I was most curious about going into it was—given that so much of dnd is a) collaborative storytelling and b) ultimately determined by dice rolls, how would those elements of unpredictability translate to a scripted story? (which I suppose is not new to dnd-based media, there have been novels and the 80s show, but those aren't things that I've consumed.) and like. yes the story was pretty predictable overall, but I did like that there were moments of abject failure scattered throughout that really captured the vibe of rolling a nat 1 (it was also very fun to half-watch it through a lens of, oh, this person would be rolling a deception check right now. this person is succeeding then failing on a bunch of acrobatics checks, etc.)

it is. so very fun to me that bards are categorically also spellcasters, and yet they did not let chris pine do one damn magical thing, that lute was a melee weapon only

michelle rodriguez barbarian my beloved (also like, in terms of balancing references to the game with still making the movie accessible, part of me was expecting/hoping to see some visual indication of her going into a rage, but I did like that they didn't tip the hand quite that much while still making clear during fight scenes that, oh, she definitely has some rage-fueled strength right now that is allowing her to yeet a dude across a courtyard)

seeing all the spells and wildshaping was incredibly fucking cool!! that may have been the bit I was most excited about, and it did not disappoint—doric's whole infiltration and then escape of the castle was so good. the displacer beasts. the mimics!

sir that's just a portal gun

the comp het was so funny. look, I really loved both justice smith and sophia lillis but cmon guys. there was nothing there

although speaking of, edgin and holga as determinedly platonic best friends raising a child together was an absolute delight—the bit when edgin says to kira like 'I'm not trying to bring back your mom but my wife' bc yeah!! kira's mom is already right there!!

halfling bradley cooper having a clear type of 'women twice my size who could break me in half' is so valid

god paladin regé-jean page be still my heart (although yeah, the paladin as a straight-laced LG humorless type is not the only way to interpret the class, but I thought it did make for a nice contrast w the rest of the party)

but also his armor! I thought the costumers did a great job of giving them all designs/looks that spoke to their classes. truly, the visuals of the whole movie were so cool—not just in terms of the aesthetics, but the framing and movement of the shots, too. very dynamic, very fun to watch

overall, a genuinely good time!!

[booksandabeer]

Okay, so... Maestro

I know it’s the cool thing right now to shit on Bradley Cooper and his increasingly desperate attempts to win that damn Oscar, and at this point it feels a bit like kicking someone when they’re already down, but oh boy, he makes it so easy. Still, let me preface what I’m about to say by assuring everyone who might be inclined to think that this is just me piling on, that I truly, sincerely wanted to like this movie. It’s about Leonard Bernstein!!! Of course I wanted to like it!  

With that out of the way…if you already thought Bradley Cooper was a bit much in A Star Is Born, wait until you’ve seen him act at you for two hours in this never-truer-to-its-name vanity project in which producer Bradley Cooper produces director Bradley Cooper who directs leading man Bradley Cooper as he recites lines written by, you guessed it, screenwriter Bradley Cooper.

First of all, the movie looks gorgeous. It sounds wonderful. Everybody in the so-called “below the line” departments brought their absolute A-game to this. It’s a Vogue coffee table book come to life. And that is precisely where the problem lies: This is supposed to be a movie, but what it actually is is the epitome of style over substance. It is completely devoid of any meaningful insights into the man or the time or the culture it depicts. It’s not a movie about Leonard Bernstein, the artist. Which isn’t a problem per se—different approaches to biopics are perfectly valid. The real problem is that it’s not a movie about Leonard Bernstein, the man, either. It’s Bradley Cooper spending almost 100 million dollars cosplaying as The Great Artist—beloved by intellectuals and the common folk alike—that he so desperately wishes to be himself.

Cooper's performance is A LOT. From the many affectations to the sweaty mania that is constantly turned up to 11 to the extremely nasal intonation (that seems to come and go) to, yes, the stupid and entirely unnecessary prosthetic nose—he does The Most in every single scene. Now, you might say I’m biased by my recent love for Fellow Travelers, but still, what Matt Bomer—in a small part as Bernstein’s lover and collaborator David Oppenheim—does in one scene that shows him smiling through the pain of being casually cast aside by his lover, moved me more than (almost) anything Cooper does in the entire movie. They also share a moment later that is almost unbearable to watch because of the pain seeping out of these two men who are, due to a mix of self-denial and societal oppression, not allowed to (or allowing themselves to) live life as their true selves. Finally! Some real human emotion! That is the movie I want to see. And it is so telling that this moment of actual tangible humanity happens when Cooper finally calms down for five fucking seconds.

All that isn’t to say that there aren’t any scenes here that have true charm and flair; at times the movie even comes close to moments of true beauty and grace that could be poignant, even devastating in the best of ways—were they not ruined by some “eccentric” directorial choice, baffling camera placements, shots that either linger on forever or are abruptly cut short. I was practically waiting for him to turn to the camera and ask “see what I did there?” Yes, we see it. We see it in the fantastical dance sequences, the 40s noir inspired shots, the shift from black and white to color halfway through the movie, the classic 4:3 aspect ratio, and the many many many allusions that do not serve this story and these characters at all but make it very clear to the audience that Cooper has seen a lot of movies. He’s a student of Cinemah, didn't you know? Anyway, all of these things aren’t bad ideas in and of themselves, but he does not know how to edit himself (or his movie) and so it’s just all too much, all the time, and it goes on for way too long.  

Let’s talk briefly about the Felicia of it all. Briefly, because for all the noise that Cooper has made about this being a movie that is just as much about Bernstein’s wife and their love story as it is about the man himself, I could not tell you who this woman was any more than I could before I sat down to watch two hours of Carey Mulligan reacting to Bernstein’s genius. Mulligan tries her best but she’s really only allowed to play two modes: swooning with adoration or vibrating with repressed anger. That’s it. I have no idea who Felicia Montealegre was beyond her husband’s wife. What did she want her life and her career to be? Was she truly passionate about acting or was it just a fun hobby to pass the time? And what did she hope to get out of this marriage, which—the movie makes it very clear—she entered into with the full awareness that there were parts of her husband’s life and heart that would remain forever inaccessible to her? Who knows. I certainly don’t.

Despite all claims to the contrary, this movie, and therefore I must assume the man who made it, is deeply uninterested in actually exploring this woman’s inner life. There’s no small amount of sad irony to be found in the parallel of Felicia serving as a shield of respectability for Bernstein (not only as that, because I do not doubt that they loved each other, but it was certainly one of the reasons for why he married her) and Cooper using his supposed interest in her (and to a lesser extent his lead actress) all these years later as a kind of preemptive measure to ward off criticism that he’s only interested in the Male Genius.  

Finally. What’s actually worse than all of the above is that somehow Bradley Cooper managed to do the impossible: He made a movie about Leonard Bernstein that is both utterly exhausting and—the true cardinal sin—terribly boring.  

[seeingivy]

random method acting thoughts + asks

correct. you are absolutely correct. AND I THINK I MENTIONED THIS A FEW TIMES but every time I feel like method acting drama is unrealistic I remember that nicki minaj exists and sleep well at night. MEGAN DEFENDER FOR LIFE

trust. we've got a tweets heavy chapter. and her comeback tweet is so petty I don't even know how we got here but we're here

WAIT UR SO RIGHT. casual E charm around her neck and she's just like yeah what? no i'm not dating him what are you talking about (yes, she is)

thank you so much ☹️ i've been having the worst week (for two weeks in a row) and kind words like this mean so much to me. the headspace has not been the most fun space to be lately (and sometimes I worry that reflects in what I wrote) but i'm glad that it's made you happy and given you that feeling of love. that's all I could hope for and it almost makes me teary eyed that some shred of that is still there even when i'm not feeling the best 💌

here are my random thoughts:

connie has the online presence of tik tok user @/nmillz. like him single handedly reviving all in my head (flex) by fifth harmony (PLEASE TELL ME YOU'VE SEEN IT) is the funniest thing ever and even the way he talks/what he talks about reminds me of method acting connie 😭

this is so random but mentally in my head, I associate some of the characters with like real celebrities and influencers in terms of aesthetic and vibe, which i've seen some readers do which is so interesting cuz our picks are never the same

like y/n in my head is olivia rodrigo coded. like her having a specific brand (very romantic, lovey dovey) when she was on disney channel (and maybe was asked to lean into really hard) as opposed to guts/sour which is so.....emotional/ jealously/rock that's kind of the vibe I get from that character (or at least where we are headed)

historia in terms of aesthetic/character is sabrina carpenter and taylor swift. sabrina carpenter in terms of aesthetics/looks (she is very much the beauty standard, the dream girl, nonsense outros) and in terms of character is taylor swift? like she's a relatable but there's a part of her that's always going to be untouchable (for taylor that's just cuz I think she's a billionaire/very detached from reality, but for the character that just stems from being so deep in the whole industry type thing that she kind of forgets what matters sometimes)

gabi in general reminds me of billie eilish, in terms of where her character will go. I wanted to include the real life hate that gabi as a character got in the show into the story, but I also feel like that hate sometimes is given to billie eilish. to the point where when she wins grammy's she's apologizing bc she feels like she doesn't deserve it, but at the end of the day...she's one of the most talented artists in our generation? what was I made for? bad guy? happier than ever? they were all phenomenal. gabi can be a great actress but she'll never feel like it!

sukuna and y/n give zendaya and timothee vibes. eren and lana give bradley cooper and emma stone in the variety actors on actors interview.

falco and gabi are walter scobell and leah sava jefferies in terms of dynamic and vibes. I will die on this hill.

eren and y/n are andrew garfield/emma stone (ref: she was like a shot of espresso), danielle galligan/calahan skogman (ref: matching tattoos), daisy ridley jones/paul mescal (ref: undeniable SOMETHING)

hyla just has kardashians/nicki minaj level audacity. like kim wearing a purple dress and posting a story w/ speak now...nicki minaj ai generated diss track like that's her.

[whatsnewalycat]

Just Dumb Enough to Try

Chapter 11: Shallow

Word Count: 3.7k

Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Reader

Rating: Explicit (18+ only)

Tags / CW: swearing, cheating/infidelity, lying, smut, spanking, PIV sex, daddyyyy, dirty talk, we're going to pretend I know anything about ranching, i've shoehorned several headcanons in here, lotta lotta fluff

Chapter Summary: Our heroes have a sleepover (part one)

Notes: Chapter title from "Shallow" by Lady Gaga & Bradley Cooper. Also small note - idk if anyone actually listens to the Spotify playlists I post for chapters, but I put "Chattahoochee" by Alan Jackson on this week's playlist… and I forgot what a fun song that is. I don't even like a lot of country music, but that song makes me want to kick a fucking door off its hinges. I'm posting a day earlier than normal because I'm bored. I might be releasing more chapters earlier than anticipated because I've been able to backlog a ton of writing. Idk, we'll see what happens!!

[ First Chapter ] [ Previous Chapter ] [ Spotify Playlist ] [ AO3 ]

Peña Ranch, Laredo, TX June 24, 1998

You follow the directions Javier scrawled on the back of a receipt, hoping that you interpret the chicken scratch correctly. Clouds of dust billow out from beneath your tires as you make your way down the desolate dirt road. The radio is off because you’re so nervous, you can’t concentrate with the music playing. Your heart skips a beat when you see a driveway branch off of the road; the gateway above it reads Peña Ranch.

You last saw Javi on Monday, only able to spend about two hours together before he dropped you off at home. He found a place to park on some back road. While rifling through his stack of cassette tapes he keeps in the truck, you found out that, much to your surprise and delight, his go-to album is Prince’s Purple Rain . Among his collection, you also found Public Enemy’s Fear of a Black Planet, Johnny Cash’s American Recordings, and Alan Jackson’s A Lot About Livin’ and a Little ‘Bout Love. This small peak into his music taste is fucking fascinating to you.

But, to be fair, your curiosity is piqued by every scrap of information he’ll give you about himself. For instance, you asked if he's ever been hunting, then he casually told you about how he and his partner shot Pablo Escobar’s homing pigeons that were sent out to communicate via pigeon post while imprisoned. Which only made you have more questions.

“Can I ask you something?” you tilted your chin up to make eye contact with him while resting your head on his lap.

He ran his fingers through your hair, “What?”

“Well… when we went to that restaurant, in the bathroom before we, um,” you couldn’t keep a giant smile from spreading across your face, “fucked. You said something about having a um… body count.”

One hand continued to absentmindedly comb through your hair, while the other danced along your belly, causing your whole body to shudder. He hummed, “Mhmm.”

“What did you mean by that? Like, have you…” you scrunched your nose, not sure if you even wanted to keep asking this question.

He raised his eyebrows, “I’ve killed people, is that what you’re asking?”

You nodded, stomach twisting into a knot, “Do you regret it?”

“That’s a complicated question to answer,” he paused talking to think about it, but never ceased petting you affectionately. After a while, he said, “I don’t like some of the things I did in the DEA, especially… that. You lose a little humanity, you know?” he sighed, “I don’t know.”

You reached up and stroked your thumb against his cheek, stubble like sandpaper, and he leaned into your touch. You wished you could bottle this feeling. The tenderness shared between the two of you when you’re alone makes you feel whole and content.

“It’s ok to not know,” you assured him softly, running your fingers along his mustache, then down to trace his lips, “I’m just glad you’re here.”

He brought his hand up to hold you in place as he turned to kiss your fingertips, your palm, your wrist. And just like that, you were his. The gentle touching and kissing gave way to hungrier urges. Soon you were panting against his mouth as you both frantically pulled clothing off and out of the way.

Post-sex, still breathing heavy, you commented, “I can’t wait to fuck you in a bed.”

“Yeah?” he grinned over at you, basking in the afterglow, “You wanna have a sleepover?”

“A sleepover?” you grin from ear to ear at the slightly juvenile term, “I would love that.”

“Wednesday?”

And it was set.

When a well-maintained brick rambler comes into view, so does a blue merle Australian Shepherd, sprinting from behind the house to see who the visitor is. Javi steps out the front door and starts walking up to meet you, giving an enthusiastic wave and a bright smile that calms your nerves like a Xanax.

“Welcome, cariño,” he greets as you slam the car door behind you.

A grin spreads across your face at the warm welcome. You cheer when the dog skitters at your feet, wagging a stubby tail, then you drop into a crouch to pet him. Javier crouches down next to you, scratching the dog on his butt, causing one of the furry beast’s back legs to start thumping a plume of dust off the gravel driveway.

“What’s his name?” you peer over at Javi, who is just fucking beaming at you. Your stomach flips like you’re free falling.

“Pickles”

You literally squeal; small happy tears prick at the corners of your eyes, “Pickles?!? Oh my god this is the best, I love him.”

“Are you… crying?” he laughs as you both stand up and you wipe your eyes.

“I’m just really happy,” you sniffle, then try to hide your blushing face in embarrassment, “Sorry.”

His thumbs hook through the belt loops on your shorts and pull your waist against his. He leans his back against the truck, then places a light kiss on your cheek, rumbling, “Don’t apologize.”

Nodding up at him through your eyelashes, you flick your eyes between his lips and eyes suggestively. You lean in towards each other, lips meeting in the middle. The kiss is a slow, intimate thing; lips wet and mouths parted enough for your tongues to greet each other. You dissolve into it, arching your back against him, running your fingers through his silky hair. His hands snake around your waist before settling below the hem of your shorts.

The bulge in his jeans twitches as his fingers slide up the back of your shorts, where he firmly grabs handfuls of your ass. A quiet moan slips from your lips onto his. You feel him smile against you before he pulls back.

“Let me show you around,” he requests, slipping his hands out of your shorts. You push off of him, almost on top of Pickles, who has apparently been waiting patiently for you two to stop pawing at each other (dog pun).

His fingers intertwine with yours. Pickles follows behind diligently as Javi takes you on a brief walking tour, showing you one of the livestock barns, some other outbuildings, then brings you up the home’s back porch. As you’re walking up, his dad opens the sliding glass door and gives a small wave. Javi introduces you.

“I believe we’ve met,” he says gruffly, reaching out to shake your hand. He looks down at your hands clasped with Javi’s, then back up to you only after you let go of his son, “With the Bakers, right?”

“That’s right,” you nod, flush breaking out on your face right as your sweaty palm meets his rough one. when you pull back, you cross your arms in front of your abdomen self-consciously.

“Their boy Dan, aren’t you engaged to him?” he further inquires.

You clamp your mouth shut and just nod again.

Fuck fuck fuck

He turns his gaze to Javier, raising his eyebrows and pointing at you, “This is who you’ve been seeing?”

“Yeah, Dad,” Javi sighs, scratching the back of his neck and shifting his weight to one hip.

Chucho looks between the two of you, then shakes his head and chuckles, “You’re both idiots,” while sitting down in a rocking chair on the porch. Laughter bursts out of you.

“Really?” Javi rebuffs his father. Chucho simply nods and chuckles to himself. Javi turns to you, apologies written all over his face, “He doesn’t m-“

You cut him off, shaking your head and smiling with amusement, “No, I think that’s a fair judgment. We are both idiots.”

Chucho looks at him, points to you again, and laughs, “See?”

“Unbelievable,” Javi sighs, looking between you and his dad before settling his eyes on you, “You wanna go inside?”

“Sure. It was nice to see you again, Chucho,” you smile politely and wave at him while Javier guides you into the house by the small of your back. You enter the house into the kitchen. There’s a delicious savory smell wafting through the air.

“As you can see, we’ve got the kitchen, dining room, living room all right here,” he points around the open floor plan and identifies each area. It features a lot of rustic decor, brown furniture, a fire place in the living room… it’s a cozy space, warm and inviting, just like the Peñas.

“It smells so fucking good in here, what are you making? Do I get to eat it?” you question while wandering around the common areas of the house, trailing your finger pads long everything you come across.

“Barbacoa. Dad put it together for dinner, so, yes you get to eat it,” he tells you, leaning up against the kitchen island counter and shoving his hands in his front pockets. He observes you as you explore.

You make your way to a hutch that displays a variety of deer figurines, framed family photos, and other keepsakes. You zero in on one picture in particular, in which a young boy, looking to be 3 or 4, is being held by a woman. The boy has a mop of curly dark brown hair, huge dark eyes, and is laying his head on the woman’s chest, smiling so big you can see his dimples. The woman has the exact same facial features, and a bright smile is spread across her face. She’s beautiful. Her long, wavy, dark brown hair flows down her back.

“Is this you and your mom?” you ask, hunching over so you can examine the photo closer.

“Yeah. That’s a was taken at my 4th birthday party,” he tells you.

Peering back at him, then back at the photo, you smile, “You look just like her.”

You stand up straight and trace the engravings on the hutch, stopping to touch a figurine of a fawn that looks like it’s made a entirely of jade, then another that’s a glass buck standing alert. You’re so focused on the collection, studying each figurine, mesmerized by the variety, trying to determine what the criteria was for selecting each piece, that you don’t notice Javi hovering behind you, watching you closely.

His hands slowly creep around your waist as he pulls your back against him, nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck. The embrace is all encompassing, and you sink into him.

“Do you want to see my room?” he mumbles against your ear. The words reverberate down your spine

“I am dying to see your room,” you purr.

He leads you down the hallway and ushers you into a slightly disheveled bedroom that’s furnished with a desk, dresser, bookshelf, and a queen size bed, made up with a black duvet. The white walls are almost completely bare, save for a calendar and a cork board above the desk.

“Ooo so this is where the magic happens?” you tease, biting your lip and poking him before you walk over to his dresser and start fondling the belongings he has on display. There are framed pictures: a much younger Javi dressed in a graduation cap and gown, mom on one side of him and dad on the other, younger Javi with a pretty smiling blonde woman, and a more recent Javi next to a tall mustachioed blonde man. There’s a dish with miscellaneous coins, paper clips, pins. A pair of sunglasses, which you’ve seen him wear frequently, sits next to the dish.

He scoffs and sits down on the bed, studying you studying him.

"What are these for?" you ask when you spot a few hardcover text books on his desk. Also scattered across the desktop is a haphazard stack of files and loose papers, a paperback copy of And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie, a DEA coffee cup filled with pens, an ashtray, and an open notebook filled with illegible scribbles.

He clears his throat, then falters, "I um... I look at cold cases when I have free time."

A grin crosses your face as you mutter under your breath, "That's so fucking cool."

You step closer to look at the cork board hanging on the wall above his desk, chest fluttering when you see the drawings you’ve given him: a deer and a willow tree. They're pinned up next to a calendar, along with your phone number. A confession leaves your lips, “I didn’t think you would actually keep these.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

When you turn around and face him, his brow is furrowed, mouth turned down in a frown.

“I… I don’t know. Nobody has really liked my doodles before,” you admit.

He grabs your hand and pulls you closer, resting his ear against your belly, hugging your waist as he mumbles, "I like them."

Your fingers card through his hair and he turns to gaze up at you, warm and wanting. It sends goosebumps rippling across your skin. You bend down and press your lips onto his, drawing back for a moment, only to renew the kiss with fervor. His tongue runs along yours as you part your mouth. As he kisses you, heat pools in your center from the insatiable way he nips and tugs at you. You’ve barely been touching a minute and already you want him.

Fiending for more, you climb on top of him and push him flush against the mattress. His fingers dig into your sides as he presses you down, arching his hips so you can feel how bad he wants you. It draws a shaky breath from your chest and you grind down onto him. He groans, “Fuck, baby that’s so good.”

The praise flips your stomach; you fold on top of him and growl into his ear, “stick out your tongue.” He follows your direction and moans as you lap against his tongue, into his mouth, licking every inch of the cavern desperately. You trail messy kisses down his face to his throat, where you stretch your mouth wide to suck and fondle the salty skin. A possessiveness falls over you; thinking of how women frequently approach this handsome man, you want a mark to show he’s yours.

His hands roam under your shorts, palming your cheeks in unison, bouncing your ass up and down, slow at first, with increasing speed as you arch your back into it and whimper. It sends a dizzying rush of pleasure up your middle, and you moan, “slap my ass.”

His palm meets your ass check with a loud smack. “Do you like that?” he asks through gritted teeth.

“Fuck yes. Do it again,” you breathe, nodding and popping your ass up as far as you can for better access.

“You like it when I slap your ass, baby?” he growls as a sharp pain shoots across the other cheek with a smack.

The sounds ring throughout the room with an echo smack smack smack smack, turning you into a writhing, sopping wet mess, crying, “Yes yes yes, baby holy fuck-"

“Yes daddy,” he corrects firmly. His deep voice bounces off the empty walls of his bedroom, harmonizing with countless smacks that almost bury the moans escaping you.

You gasp as his hands take up more real estate in your shorts, then he spreads your ass apart, “Y-yes… yes daddy. Fuck- yes daddy.”

He growls, “Such a good girl. Take your clothes off for me.”

You’re on your feet in a second while he sits up in bed, both of you ripping your clothes off frantically. Once you’re both completely stripped, there's a moment reserved to observe each other, nude, ripe with desire, panting and sweating. This is the first time you’ve seen each other completely naked in the light of day. This is the first time you’ve been together in a bed. You try to soak in every detail, noting that his shoulders are broad and tanned, slight farmer’s tan. Prominent veins in his forearms. Sparse chest hair. Soft belly accented with a thicket of dark hair running from his navel to his engorged, deliciously thick, cock. He’s fucking gorgeous.

His lust-blown eyes scan over your bare skin; he reaches out and runs his fingers along your sides, causing goosebumps break out on across on your skin. The touch is so soft, so delicate, in stark contrast to the slaps that have surely made your ass beet red. A small whimper falls from your lips as his touch sets your nerves on fire. He whispers breathlessly, “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

The words pull at your heart and suck the air from your lungs. He’s looking at you with such warmth and admiration, you start to blush and your cunt clenches. Your hands cup his cheeks, thumb rubbing along his face affectionately. His eyes bore into yours, hot and ready. You push him back onto the bed again and straddle him, sliding his cock between your slick, swollen lips. He embraces you in a kiss, sweet and gentle at first, then deepens it, pulling you down closer to him. When you pull back from his kiss just enough to press your forehead against his, you profess to him hesitantly, “I love the way you look at me. I- I love the way you touch me… you make me feel wanted. It’s… it’s fucking mad how I feel when I’m with you.”

He searches your eyes, nodding like he knows. Like he feels exactly the same. He starts thrusting, just so his cock lightly rubs up and down your folds. You shudder. His lips form an O and his brows draw together as he throws his head back.

You position yourself so his member is at your entrance, then lower down just enough to engulf the head. A groan flies from his throat as you keep him there, torturing him.

“Please,” he begs, bucking his hips up to get more of you. You lower yourself down further, working yourself open with him inch by inch, breath hitching as your pussy gets filled exactly how you need it to be.

Pleasure floods your body, rippling from your center through your toes and fingers. Your whimpers bounce off the walls as you rut up and down his shaft. He huffs and pants from beneath you, matching your movements with his own, arching his back until you’re filled to the hitch. You moan, “Your cock is- fuck- is perfect- m-made to be inside me.”

He holds your hips down against him hard and drives into you, making you gasp, then groans, “I love it when you talk to me like that, baby-“

You defy his grasp and start rolling your hips, grinding down onto him. He growls and flips so your back is against the mattress and he’s on top of you now, cradling your head in his strong hands. He begins pounding into you, and Jesus fuck the noises this man has you making as you’re panting and kissing on his lips, his face, begging for him to not stop; your entire body is humming and throbbing.

“You’re such a good girl, taking me so well,” he coos, holding your foreheads together while he fucks you into the mattress.

“Javi- baby- fuck, I’m going to cum-“ you cry, arching your back up towards him as the tingling in your center starts to grow. You whine and press your lips onto his for a sloppy desperate kiss, needing to be as close to him as possible.

His hips stutter as he starts to come undone, “yes- be a good girl cum for me baby, let me feel that tight pussy-“ and you find your release, crying out as pleasure ripples across your body and around his cock. He follows shortly after with a feral groan.

“Holy shit,” you whisper as he rolls off of you, then drapes his arm across your stomach. He hums and closes his eyes in agreement, pulling you into his chest. You settle there, content to feel his heart beat against your ear as he plays with your hair. The rise and fall of his chest hypnotizes you into a tranquil state. With your fingertips and your nails, you absentmindedly draw swirls and hearts onto his torso, trace his facial features, explore him with a wonder you can’t help but have.

He kisses the top of your head and mumbles, “I have to do some stuff outside, you wanna come with me?”

“Will I get in the way?” you ask, not sure what ‘some stuff outside’ entails.

He frowns, “Of course not.”

So you both get dressed and go outside, meeting Pickles and Chucho back on the porch where you left them.

“Hey Pop, we’re gonna go take a drive around,” Javi informs his dad as he leads you towards a four wheeler.

You get on after him, securing your arms around his waist, and Pickles jumps on behind you. While navigating around the land, Javi points out different landmarks, tells you stories, and details to you different things he keeps an eye out for while driving around like this, like fencing that needs repair, signs of overgrazing, making sure the cows are all acting normal, etc. With every nugget of information he gives you, you ask too many questions in return, but he’s patient and knows you’re just inquisitive.

Not only do you feel physically close to him, clinging onto him, nuzzled against his back, inhaling his scent… but you also feel emotionally close to him. He puts his hand on yours every so often, rubbing his thumb across your skin affectionately. You know he's giving you a tour because you’ve shown interest in what he does on the ranch, but also, you think he actually wants to share pieces of himself with you. You wonder if he’s been able to share himself freely before. You haven't been able to. Not like this. Being with him always brings you a great sense of euphoria, but it’s especially intense today.

Once you return to the barn, the three of you hop off as Javi kills the engine. Chucho is still in the rocker on the porch, but has a tall, sweaty, glass of iced tea in his hand now. It’s fucking hot out. If you were hydrated enough to produce saliva, you'd be drooling at it.

“Y’all hungry?” he asks.

“Starving,” you respond without hesitation.

Javi presses his hand into the small of your back, guiding you inside, “Let’s eat.”

[ Next Chapter ]

[kristenswig]

Best Picture

The Holdovers

Oppenheimer

Killers of the Flower Moon

Barbie

Poor Things

American Fiction

Maestro

Past Lives

Anatomy of a Fall

The Zone of Interest I think it might actually be this easy but just in case! - The Color Purple, Saltburn, Origin, Air, Napoleon

Director

Christopher Nolan - Oppenheimer

Martin Scorsese - Killers of the Flower Moon

Yorgos Lanthimos - Poor Things (most likely to get Denis Villeneuved, however)

Alexander Payne - The Holdovers

Jonathan Glazer - The Zone of Interest Alt for Payne - Greta Gerwig - Barbie (I never thought she was getting nominated but now that more people seem to agree I'm suspicious!) Alt for Glazer or Lanthimos - Justine Triet - Anatomy of a Fall JUST IN CASE - J.A. Bayona - Society of the Snow

Actress (optimism!)

Lily Gladstone - Killers of the Flower Moon

Emma Stone - Poor Things

Carey Mulligan - Maestro

Sandra Huller - Anatomy of a Fall

Greta Lee - Past Lives they'll reward her for producing the biggest hit of the year but take the performance for granted - Margot Robbie - Barbie I simply do not buy it! - Annette Bening - Nyad Well, - Fantasia Barrino - The Color Purple

Actor

Paul Giamatti - The Holdovers

Cillian Murphy - Oppenheimer

Bradley Cooper - Maestro

Jeffrey Wright - American Fiction (is he the secret snub?)

Leonardo DiCaprio - Killers of the Flower Moon (I was expecting him to get The Irishman-ed but I think Lily switching to lead will make them a pair) Will look the best on the red carpet - Colman Domingo - Rustin No<3 - Barry Keoghan - Saltburn On the off chance they're interested in nominating a single good performance in this category - Andrew Scott - All of Us Strangers

Supporting Actress

Da'Vine Joy Randolph - The Holdovers

Emily Blunt - Oppenheimer -----BAR OF CERTAINTY-----

Danielle Brooks - The Color Purple -----BAR OF SEMI-CERTAINTY------

Penelope Cruz - Ferrari (she's been nominated with less support?)

Rosamund Pike - Saltburn no legitimate awards body has nominated her without Annette Bening and I'm not predicting her either! - Jodie Foster - Nyad it's definitely not a rage stroke - Julianne Moore - May December do they care about the acting in this? - Sandra Huller - The Zone of Interest nice try! - America Ferrera - Barbie DJR is sucking up so many number 1 votes something wild is bound to happen - Rachel McAdams - Are You There God? It's Me Margaret

Supporting Actor

RDJ - Oppenheimer

Ryan Gosling - Barbie

Robert De Niro - Killers of the Flower Moon

Dominic Sessa - The Holdovers

Willem Dafoe - Poor Things When there's two from the same movie they go with the older one - Mark Ruffalo - Poor Things If they have to nominate someone under 50 in this category it certainly won't be for someone this pretty! - Charles Melton - May December cannot conjure the image of a single person putting this at number 1 on their ballot - Sterling K. Brown - American Fiction

Adapted Screenplay

American Fiction

Oppenheimer

Poor Things

Barbie

Killers of the Flower Moon This is for my people who just lost someone - The Zone of Interest, All of Us Strangers, Are You There God? It's Me Margaret

Original Screenplay

The Holdovers

Past Lives

Anatomy of a Fall

Maestro

Saltburn They can't do three good screenplays - May December Congrats on the WGA nominations - Air, Asteroid City

Cinematography

Poor Things

Oppenheimer

Killers of the Flower Moon

Maestro

The Zone of Interest honestly wasteful to have shot this on film - Saltburn am I an Ed Lachman FAN? - El Conde

Costume Design

Barbie

Poor Things

Killers of the Flower Moon

Napoleon

Oppenheimer (if EEAAO could do it) COIN TOSS - Maestro

Film Editing

[REDACTED]

Killers of the Flower Moon

Poor Things

The Holdovers

Anatomy of a Fall enough - Barbie Tar voters I know you're out there - The Zone of Interest get some help - Maestro cars - Ferrari

Makeup & Hairstyling

Maestro

Poor Things

Golda

Oppenheimer

Killers of the Flower Moon (the BAFTA nomination is throwing me) ???? - Society of the Snow Presumably has to get one of it's shortlists? - Napoleon

Production Design

Poor Things

Barbie

Oppenheimer

Killers of the Flower Moon

Napoleon wish I were brave enough to predict this - The Zone of Interest

Score

Oppenheimer

Killers of the Flower Moon

Poor Things

Indiana Jones

The Zone of Interest Alt - anything animated

[REDACTED]

the good Barbie song

the bad Barbie song

Diane Warren

Rustin

Killers of the Flower Moon alt - American Symphony, the other good Barbie song

Sound

[REDACTED]

Maestro

Killers of the Flower Moon

Ferrari

The Zone of Interest I feel like that's it but here's the rest of the list in descending order of likelihood - Barbie, Napoleon, The Killer, Mission Impossible, The Creator

Visual Effects

Poor Things

Marvel 32

The Creator

Godzilla

Society of the Snow I'm bombing this category as usual - Spiderman, Napoleon, Indiana Jones

Animated

Spiderman

The Boy and the Heron

Elemental

Nimona

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (really?) every year I try to predict one of these but I've decided to learn my lesson this time - Suzume they're running - Chicken Run

Documentary

20 Days in Mariupol

Beyond Utopia

Still: a Michael J. Fox Movie

The Eternal Memory

Bobi Wine: The People's President FRONTRUNNER SNUB - American Symphony possibly too experimental? - Four Daughters

International

The Zone of Interest

Society of the Snow

Fallen Leaves (BECAUSE there is nothing to get)

20 Days in Mariupol

Totem Justine's Revenge - The Taste of Things lmao - The Teachers' Lounge is Danish - The Promised Land is allegedly terrible so definitely a contender - Amerikatsi forgot to release it - Perfect Days what about the YAK - The Monk and the Gun It*lian - Io Capitano Remember taste? - Godland

[mermaidsirennikita]

and none for bradley cooper! you love to see it

He was MAD too. You could see it written on his face, and he's always been rumored to have thrown a fit over not getting nominated for Best Director for ASIB (even though he WAS nominated for Best Actor).

I think he's just... so bizarrely entitled. I'm not saying he isn't a talented actor (directing... who knows if ASIB was a fluke, and I do think he benefited from it being a remake, with three versions to draw from--it wasn't even the first one to focus on the music industry versus the movie industry). But Bradley was a comedy guy for years, and many of those movies were absolute stinkers. The Hangover Part II and III, He's Just Not That Into You, ALL ABOUT STEVE??? He was the "Not Michael Vartan" on Alias.

He really began to turn it around (moviewise) with Silver Linings Playbook and his other David O. Russell movies (which....) and tbh other actors understandably always got more attention--Jennifer Lawrence, Christian Bale, Amy Adams. He wasn't ever this guy who LOST BY A HAIR or was seen as like... super respected but passed over. Leonardo DiCaprio, easily one of the best actors of his gen, got passed over for an Oscar 4x (never mind the times when he wasn't nominated and should've been lol) and he's probably about to have another loss lol. Bradley has been nommed 4x, and let me tell you, he ain't Leo.

It seems like he has this very "I'm due" perspective, when much better actors, including those who have BEEN respected and seen as True Artists for way longer than he has (like Cillian) have waited way longer to get their flowers. It's like... no dude. You have been THISCLOSE to clinching.

Like, let's get granular. SLP, he lost to DANIEL DAY-LEWIS. DDL. One of the GOATs. Did you REALLY think you were gonna beat DANIEL. DAY-LEWIS. There were (other) better performances than Bradley that year (I think Denzel was excellent in Flight) but it wasn't even close, dude.

American Hustle--admittedly this was a shitty category that year, full of shitty people. But Jared Leto was very much seen as a shoe-in, as much as I hate to say it. Barkhad Abdi, I'm sorry.

American Sniper--honestly, such a bad movie lol. And he lost to Eddie Redmayne (whew, The Theory of Everything has taken a hit recently) who was in a very standard, "he had to work really hard physically" movie, but like... he did legit have to do some challenging work. And if it wasn't him, it would've been Michael Keaton, who was in a really different movie and had a strong comeback narrative.

ASIB--honestly, his strongest showing to me, but he wasn't ever gonna win. Rami was seen as obligatory after Bohemian Rhapsody. Which... I think Rami is a great actor. BR was a mess with a frankly disrespectful depiction of Freddie Mercury. I don't think it was THAT GREAT a performance either. But he did go into it very expected to win. This is probably the closest Bradley got and honestly, I would've given it to him because the category was weak that year, but I don't think he had a REALLY GOOD chance. Rami was anointed by then. And tbh, when he got passed over for Best Director... I think the writing was on the wall. I think he over-campaigned, and Lady Gaga was the real centerpiece and everyone knew it.

Again, this really wasn't a moment where it's like "WHEN WILL HE HAVE HIS MOMENT" like Leo. He's a good actor. There are a LOTTA better actors. The idea that he can compete with Cillian in... any of the above performances, let alone in MAESTRO, against what Cillian did in Oppenheimer especially, is delusional lol. Tommy Shelby Cillian, if he was up for an Oscar, would step on Bradley performance-wise, let alone Oppenheimer. I'm not even an Oppenheimer stan, but the black and white shots of him with the hat alone are like, already kinda icon lol. This. Is. His. Moment.