Out Of The Woods, 6 (ls2)
Logan and Dhanishka finally have the necessary breakthrough, Olivia delivers some bad news that Dhanishka already has a backup plan for. Logan just has a really good time at the end.
warnings/notes: panic attack in the beginning, mentions of alcohol, i don’t really think much else? ok i KNOW viscaal is an actual dude but like. i forgot. so just imagine he has a brother or smthn idk. bit shorter but hey. this is for logan bc fuck williams man
(series masterlist) (ch 7)
-
“Isa!”
I, despite my best efforts, cannot get a solid breath in. Someone's hands are on my face, trying to rouse me from whatever's got my eyes squeezed shut. I gasp again and they're brushing tears off of my cheeks. When I hold my breath, choking on an inhale, the voice is panicked, telling me to breathe. Then blowing a gust of air on my face.
Somehow the air is what snaps my eyes open.
"Christ, Isa." Logan's saying, holding a phone to his ear as he presses my hair down with one hand, "hey, hey, it's okay..."
"Lo-Logan?" I rasp and he nods, a tiny, worried smile crossing his face as he turns to the phone and speaks in a hushed tone.
"I've got her, thanks Anya. I'll text you when I get her in bed."
When he puts his phone down, he hands me a water bottle but holds the bottom of it as I take small slow sips and try not to burst into tears yet again. He doesn't say anything, not even when I lower my hand from where it's been resting over his thudding heart.
"You called my sister?" I ask and he pauses, before nodding.
"Yeah. I figured Anya would know how to help you out of a panic attack." He says and I nearly choke on my water.
"I had a panic attack?" I ask and he stills, before he is everything around me. His hands are gentle, tucking me against his chest, one hand carding through my hair as the other holds me tight.
“Oh, Isa—“ He murmurs into my hair. I whisper out confusion, I had a panic attack? I never have panic attacks? Is that why I blacked out? When did he get here?
“Oh, Isa, I’m so sorry they’ve turned you into me.” Logan presses his hands to either side of my face, lifting me back so I can look at him. I remember how a week ago I was afraid of loving him, how I was terrified I'd lose him, and yet here he was as stubborn and comforting as always. As he had been in China. As he had been in Miami. As he now was in Imola.
"I can't do this Logan." I hiccup, letting him bring me into his arms once more, kisses trailing my forehead as he keeps me locked in tight, "I can't take another day of this comparing bullshit! They hate me, all of them in Ferrari. I don't even know if I still have Charles, and they keep pushing and pushing and I just wanna be good!"
"You are good. You are so good." He murmurs, "You're doing better than I did my first season. I had panic attacks almost every race, I still have them sometimes."
When I look at him in disbelief he sighs, "the difference between us is that you have Ferrari and I have Williams. Alex and I are actually cared for within Williams. They care about our health, our wellbeing. Ferrari always has and always will put you below Charles because he's the predestined or whatever. It's stupid. It's what drove Carlos out according to Oscar, who heard it from Lando so who knows--but my point still stands."
I sniffle, nodding, wiping at my face and huffing when I realize I had cried. Logan convinces me to swap seats with him, and he drives us back to the hotel. He follows the same procedures as he had with my migraine and we settle in to watch Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara-- one of my favorite Bollywood movies I'd forced him to watch with me before. Surprisingly, he remembers a lot of it and then embarrassedly admits,
"We watched it on your birthday every year, I kept up the tradition. Even though Dalton thought it was stupid I did that."
I can't help but kiss him then, fully of my own decision and his hands comes to my waist as he pulls me down to slot against him. I throw my right leg over when he bites my lip, groaning in the back of my throat. The Señorita scene is playing from his laptop, Hrithik Roshan is dancing his heart out, Logan's lips are soft against mine.
He pulls back.
"What are we doing?" He whispers, pausing Netflix by closing his laptop and leaving us in the soft ambient glow of Imola from the half curtained windows.
"What do you mean?" I say, because I know theres more weight behind his words. He just laughs when I press a kiss to his forehead, his arm secure around my waist like he never wants to let me go. I don't want him to.
"Do you love me?" Its so vulnerable it makes me stop and he brings his hand to my throat, but just to dance his finger tips along the side of my jaw until he takes my chin in his hand and pull me a bit closer.
"Because I've always loved you in the way soulmates love each other, but I think you love me like I'm just a casual fuck."
"If you always loved me like that why'd you break up with me?" I ask and Logan sighs, letting go of my chin to place his hand on one of my thighs, the right one I had thrown over his torso when the kisses got a bit more than playful.
Logan takes a long moment to answer, like he's picking each word with the upmost care, but he just says, "I was scared."
"Scared?"
"Of you. Of racing. Of everything." He sighs and I go to slide off his lap when his fingers dig in, keeping me rooted in my seat. Just like earlier, when he was calming me in the car, just like when he had eased my migraine. He needed me.
I card my hands through his hair, being them to his shoulders and smooth the tenseness I can feel. He closes his eyes, leaning his head back as he just lets everything finally break and he hands my his heart once more.
This time, I cradle it to my chest, trying to heal it while his heart tries to smooth out the sharp edges of mine.
"I had been doing so well. I had everything in my finger tips, just within reach and then... fucking Trident rips it out from underneath my feet. I didn't know what to do, and as far as I was concerned, you were just as guilty as everyone else. I... I needed control."
I had been right when I guessed that?
"And control was breaking up with me because it was a decision you could make without having to consult anyone else?" I say and he nods.
"I regretted it every day after. There were so many times my mom had to stop Dalton from calling you or Anya." A light smile crosses his lips and I giggle, taking the hint of his slight pursed lips to press a gentle kiss to them.
"Anya was so mad at you when we broke up, she told me she was gonna go to BWT and cut your brakes." I murmur against his lips and he starts to laugh, his hands slide up to rest along my ribs as he smiles against my lips and innocent pecks.
"I wouldn't have been mad if she had. I beat myself up over it for weeks." Logan shrugged, "but uhm... I talked with Viscaal last week. He was at the race for some sponsorship thing and he stopped to congratulate me on my placement. I asked him of you were involved and he and I talked about the crash for a long time."
"And?"
"And he convinced me you weren't."
The conversation hadn't been easy. Viscaal was sort of up in arms about the idea of even discussing it with Logan, but once let in on the PR nightmare the two were going through... he relented. But he wasn't easy on Logan, he hadn't been the whole time they stood in the blistering sun over the track.
"She literally was inconsolable, how do you think she had anything to do with it?" James Viscaal had said to Logan, eyes narrowing underneath his Formula E cap, "You seriously think Dubey had anything to do with it? She'd rather hurt herself than hurt you."
"I just... I can't shake the feeling--"
"Well you better figure out how, Sargeant, or you're gonna lose a perfectly good girl."
Logan sighs as he replays the conversation two or three times, then gnaws the inside of his lip before saying, "Sorry for saying that shit to you, about not trusting you... it was childish."
"I said stupid shit too, I'm sorry." I say and he presses a more firm kiss to my lips.
"Consider that an apology accepted." He says and I smile,
"Guess I'll have to keep apologizing--" I'm cut off when he sits up abruptly, pulling me to his chest just to lay me on my back under him as he cages me beneath him.
My phone vibrates. A few missed calls from Charles. I ignore him in favor of kissing my boyfriend.
I'll tell him I was sleeping.
-
Monaco is the race for publicity. Everyone knew Monaco, and if they didn't, they just didn't know it was called Monaco. I'm snuck into Williams the day before practice, when it's mostly just vendors setting up and some meetings happening in each paddock. I'm led by Logan to a back office, where I meet with two women, and JAmes Vowles.
Who... is sitting in on the PR meeting for some reason?
The woman who leads Logan's PR is named Astrid Marina, and while I fight to figure out while that name is familiar, Logan idly pokes at my leg. I look over to read what he's showing me and groan internally.
'Ferrari and Williams in talks over suing Sky News reporter Anthony Davis for blackmailing and harassment.'
"Too much is happening this season, I don't even wanna bother." I complain and Logan nods, coaxing me to rest against him as I yawn. It's been a long week of harrowing, exhausting training with Charles. Ferrari gives me no reprieve and as I work to show them I am a capable driver, they still beat me down. Still say Charles is better. It's grown to be annoying for both me and the Monegasque, and something we bond over now in the late hours between a bottle of wine.
"How has your season been with Ferrari so far, Dhanishka?" James asks and I give him a cordial answer that has him raising an eyebrow in question as he says, "Logan's told me otherwise."
I whack Logan's arm, making the Floridian laugh as he raises his hands in defense of his actions. Something in James' eyes tells me it’s alright to say, so I do.
"It's been a terrible time if I'm honest," I sigh, "Charles is praised, I'm ignored and blamed for every mistake, they barely talk to me on radios so I kinda have to figure it all out myself, I'm hardly given real strategy and kinda just make it up myself as I go."
"And with all of that you still place in the top ten every race, and have podiumed twice. That's an incredible feat, Miss Dubey, you should be very proud of yourself."
Somehow, James saying that to me makes it all click that, yeah, it was an incredible feat.
"Alright, Jasmine is here so lets get started." Astrid settles in her seat in front of us and Logan and I sit back up from our lazing positions as Jasmine--my PR manager of several years, takes her own seat next to Astrid. James leans back in his seat as well, taking on a more observing role to this. I wonder if its because he's worried about this, or if Olivia and Lando have told him to keep an eye on it. Not that they knew who Logan's manager was, as far as I was aware.
Jasmine shuffles her papers a bit before asking, "How are you both feeling? You're almost tied for points this season."
"Feeling pretty optimistic." Logan smiles softly in greeting to her, "The car has been preforming well and I've been doing better than where I started last year."
"I'd be a lot better is my damn car worked half the time." I mutter in complaint, making Logan laugh softly as he squeezes my knee.
"I'm glad you both are feeling better." Astrid smiles, "but lets not take up too much time here for small talk, you both have busy days tomorrow."
Yay. Qualifying.
"Dhanishka, social media is your forte here. Keep posting, keep promoting the relationship. You've been doing a fine job with that. Public appearances have been fine, though I've noticed a bit of tension? Is there anything we want to confirm or ask about..?"
"How long is this going on for?" Logan asks and I feel a weird pain settle in my chest. Why did he care?
"Uhm... well..." Jasmine hums, "I'd say you guys can decide when to call it off. Astrid wanted to make sure that, unlike with Lando and Olivia previously, you both have complete control of this situation."
"Oh, Dhanishka, work on befriending some of the WAGs. I know you and Olivia are decently close, but befriending the Lily's or even Carmen would be a good look." Astrid says and I nod, opening my phone to follow them on Instagram. I was already close with Lily Zneimer, she just needed to come to a race other than Australia.
"Logan, we need you to start posting Dhanishka as well." Astrid says and Jasmine nods softly, looking like she's a bit uncomfortable by how strict Astrid is being.
"Yeah, got it." Logan nods. Theres a few more formalities, some publicity things they want us to do and a joint 'couples trivia' gave they want us to play with a bunch of the drivers before the next race on the calendar.
We're dismissed with the promise of posting each other more on social media.
"Lets go to dinner tonight." He says, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it. I smile and bump his shoulder with mine.
"Alright." I smile, its easy to be in love with Logan and he threads out fingers together and presses a soft kiss to the back of my hand.
Before I can leave though, James speaks, "Jasmine, Dhanishka, can we speak privately? I have Dhanishka's manager Lucille inside my office already.
And I nod, and follow James into his office after a quick goodbye kiss from Logan with his playful grin to match.
-
dhanishkadubey made a new post!
liked by alexalbon, lilymhe, lilyzneimer, and 459k others...
dhanishkadubey: the muse and her artist 💙🩵
tagged: logansargeant
lilymhe: blue suits u sooo much wow
logansargeant: sei incredibilmente bella (i think.)
⤷ charlesleclerc: you think right?? wtf??
user1: MY PARENTS. PARENNNTTSSSS.
logansargeant: you in blue... woof or whatever. xx
anyadubey: blue has ALWAYS been ur color.
user2: dhanishka in blue?? williams dhanishka?? please james vowles.
williamsracing: wow. logan better know how to fight.
⤷ logansargeant: which intern is this i have WORDS.
⤷ williamsracing: LOL CATCH ME FIRST FLORIDA MAN !!!
landonorris: LOGAN TOOK THESE???
⤷ dhanishkadubey: hes an artist ✨
user3: oh to be someones muse...
-
I'm walking through the apartment building Lando had sent me the address for ages ago. Logan's hand is firmly tucked in mine as he idly talks about the desserts we'd brought for the little dinner we're all having tonight. Olivia had invited over quite a few people, her family (consisting of Oscar and Lily, Ophelia and her wife Rosalind, and Oaklynn), Lando's siblings, (sisters Cisca and Flo, brother Oliver with his wife Savannah and their daughters Mila and Athena), Max, Kelly, and Penelope, Alex and Lily, Charles, and me and Logan. It was some sort of dinner party, and due to Logan's training running a bit long we were late.
Which, wasn't surprising.
Olivia said they'd be out on the balcony, so we let ourselves into the spacious apartment. Logan helping me with my shoes while I joke about balancing the three plates, but Charles cursing in Italian sharply makes us both freeze.
"Relax." Olivia scolds, almost like a mother, "she's gonna be fine, I've been in talks with multiple teams and--"
"They're just dropping her?! For Lewis? She's been beating him every damn race save for Australia!" Charles all but roars and I can hear the balcony door slam. Logan tenses, his jaw setting firmly and he tries to coax me back outside but I'm stubborn, I won't move until I know whats wrong. But I have a gut feeling I already know.
"Charles, calm down," Olivia tries again and then there's an overlap of a few voices I can't fight through.
"It's nothing set in stone! Relax!" Max's voice chimes above everyone else's and the room quiets as a soft sigh escapes Logan's mouth. He draws his arm across my back and hushes me softly, pressing a kiss to my hairline.
"Checo's moving to Formula E. I'm taking his spot next season, or I'll go to RB if they choose to move Daniel instead." Alex says softly, "which means Red Bull is set for next season regardless. Mercedes is taking Carlos to race with George, so they're set as well."
"McLaren's got me and Lando, so they're set. Neither Haas or Aston Martin are gonna change." Oscar sighs, "safe bet that Alpine and Sauber will stay the same too."
Max asks, "Is Logan staying with Williams?"
"Can we stop talking about this, they'll be here soon. Dhanishka doesn't even know yet." Olivia complains, "I don't know why you're all so surprised when Ferrari's been treating her like shit! They could care less if she's dead or alive on that track as long as Charles comes out on top. Plus, the FIA is going to investigate them for malpractice."
"Oh, actually?" Lando hums and I hear Charles confirm, and I bury my head against Logan's chest where I can hear his heart pounding. I'm trying to fight back the sense of dread forming in my gut.
"I know Logan's been trying to get her to talk with James." Alex says softly, "As far as I'm aware, Williams is resigning him with the second seat open."
Logan's grip tightens when he realizes I've figured it out and I push past him to enter the main room of the Piastri-Norris apartment. The warm Monaco air feels unwelcome as it floats in from the open balcony door where I can see the kids are being preoccupied from the inside argument. But inside, all the drivers plus Olivia stare at me like I'm not supposed to be there. And then theres movement and--
"Dhaniska!" Olivia's voice chimes and the Aussie to wrap me up tight in her arms, "Oh, honey."
"They're dropping me?" I hate the way my voice sounds so broken and despite what I want, Olivia nods.
"Last week I got both Daniel's and Alex's data from last season to sift through to help the Red Bull team figure out which driver we want next season." She starts to explain, running her fingers through my hair, "I knew some big changes were happening when we also got files for Lewis and Fernando. But.. Lewis just announced he was racing with Ferrari next season, while Charles was here. No one knew except Lewis and Vasseur. I-I can try and get you with some other teams but--"
"Olivia, I love you truly, but that's not your job." I say softly, squeezing her forearms, "A-and besides, I... I might've made a contingency plan."
The whole room pauses.
"Huh?" Logan says, tightening his grip on my wrist and I laugh. It's so stupid, how he thought his and Alex's little plan to have me replace the latter Thai driver would've gone overlooked by James. Who bit down at the chance to have me.
James pulled me and Jasmine into his office, my manager Lucie already inside. When I give a confused look, both women are motioning for me to sit in the middle of three chairs. Lucie on my left, Jasmine on my right. When I do, James takes a seat at his desk and hands me a file in the beautiful William's blue. The logo stamped on front, with words written under that make my heart pause.
'DUBEY CONTRACT DRAFT 1 - 2025'
"Dhanishka." Lucie starts, placing a reassuring hand on my knee as she sets down an identical folder, "Ferrari isn't going to renew your contract next year. I've known since Miami. Lewis is coming to race for them instead, which I thought I'd be more surprised about, but it is close to his retirement I suppose."
"He did always say he'd retire in a Ferrari." James nods, and the conversation continues, still led by Lucie.
"So, I've been in talks with almost every team--thanks to Olivia, who has an almost... deus ex machina power within F1. She got me write up contracts from Mercedes, Alpine, RB, and Stake... but they've all backed out."
James, taking this as his cue, sits forward, "Williams is going to need a driver next year. Alex is moving to one of the Red Bull teams. We'll be resigning Logan."
"Me?" I ask, "you seriously want me? The girl who almost destroyed one of your drivers PR?"
"PR is repairable," James waves a hand, "Your skill on the track is something I can relate to a young Alonso or even someone like Senna or Vettel. It's talent like yours, Charles' and Max's we wont get again soon. To podium on your first race, to stay consistently in the top ten with no support? That's unheard of."
"Williams is offering a three year contract." Lucie says and I finally thumb open the folder and stare down at it. The weight of it all becomes real when I see it all printed out.
James stands to leave as he says, "I'll leave you to speak in private."
So I can’t hide my smile as I announce, "You are looking at the second seat for Williams in 2025!"
I don’t think in my time of knowing Logan had he ever hugged me as tight as this. I can’t help but laugh as his chest presses to my back, his lips finding my cheek and undoubtedly smudging my makeup. I can’t find it in me to care.
Alex decides to make a show of giving me his seat (which includes him physically handing me a chair) and when I turn to hug Olivia and Lando in celebration, Olivia whispers to me, “I knew you guys would figure it out.”
Charles just about squeezes the life out of me with his hug, thanking me for driving with him, and I thank him for teaching me. I know later on we’ll have a more in depth conversation but for now he allows me to celebrate with Logan’s arm tucked firmly around my waist.
Kelly ends up pouring us all shots to celebrate, and when I smidge my lipstick drinking various glasses of champagne and other drinks, Logan fishes my compact and my lipstick out of my purse.
It feels full circle to have him hold the mirror while I fix myself up.
-
logansargeant made a new post!
liked by dhaniskadubey, oscarpiastri, alexalbon, and 345k others...
logansargeant: heres to second chances 💙
dhanishkadubey: AAAA MERI JAANNN <333
- logansargeant: MERI JAAN????
- dhanishkadubey: YEAH U FUCKING COLONIZER. MERI JAAN.
sebvettel: looking good rookies 👍🏻
user1: dhanishka in blue pls be a sign. pls.
dhanishkadubey: i am going to kiss u on the mouth
user2: the girlfriend effect on logans insta shut upp
oscarpiastri: loganishka since day 1
- dhanishkadubey: LOGANISHKA. IS THAT OUR SHIP NAME SHUT UP!!!
-
f1 made a new post!
liked by anyadubey, charlesleclerc, danielricciardo, and 783k others…
f1: Admist the starting investigation into malpractice within Ferrari's team following @ dhanishkadubey ‘s treatment over the past few months, Dubey released a statement about leaving the team.
“Ferrari was a dream, but the reality of Ferrari is that we are not compatible. I will continue to give my best performance for the team, wish them the best of luck next season, and send my love to the tifosi. Thank you for welcoming me.” - Dubey via Twitter this morning.
comments have been disabled for this post!
--
taglist (open, and thank you to those on it now!)
@chasing-liberosis @justsomejess @struggling-with-delia @daemyratwst
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~~~~~~~
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