Tumgik
#but I’m paralyzed by fear
paradoxolotl · 9 months
Text
I want to write a book
33 notes · View notes
sableeira · 8 months
Text
I wish I could just blackout and let my body be possessed by a ghost that answers all my unanswered text messages and takes important phone calls for me
20 notes · View notes
randomgumwrapper · 6 months
Text
and she said ‘what’s with this dog motif?’ and i said ‘do you have something against dogs?’ i am almost completely soulless i am incapable of being human i am incapable of being inhuman i am living uncontrollably
12 notes · View notes
goldensunset · 4 months
Text
kieran’s champion battle theme is a banger i’m literally feeling residual fear and stress listening to it even afterwards
#this will go down as my cynthia#if even the music makes me shake in fear even once i’m done#i mean it’s not exactly the same as losing over and over again as a poor scared child#but like i did lose twice before winning and like that first time man. paralyzed to death man.#it’s such a violent and intense theme and moment in the story#i had my expectations of what i wanted kieran’s revenge moment to look like and it did not disappoint#so like by the second two tries when that music came in i had to try my best to steel my nerves at the start of battle#only other time i’ve felt that is in my no-items volo run#i didn’t have stress and fear against him necessarily but i for sure started trembling at giratina each time#the real kicker with both those fights is how there’s no warning and free switch in between your opponents’ pokémon#which like frankly i think is wayyy more fair to the npc and makes the fight more interesting#sv dlc spoilers#teal mask/indigo disk#also i am forever gonna be peeved about the tera fighting hydrapple instantly killing my empoleon with tera blast#but like that just makes sense right? that’s smart#he was anticipating ice type moves against it probably#and even just in general fighting is a good type#ughhhhhh but like#for all other trainers with tera orbs without a specialized type team#they’re always just gonna tera into one of that pokémon’s types#for gym leaders they’re gonna send out random pokémon that don’t fit the theme but will tera into it#to be clever and mess with you#given that kieran didn’t have a themed team here i thought his ace was just gonna go grass or dragon#but of course he’s smarter than that huh.#dude i commend this man he had me shaking#pokémon
10 notes · View notes
thatineffablewitch · 2 days
Text
finally got my anxiety under control to the point where I don’t feel like I’m drowning as deadlines approach but now I have no motivation to do them without that earth-shattering fear fueling me, wtf. Neither of these can be right what exactly does normal feel like pls send help
4 notes · View notes
mourninglamby · 1 year
Text
dsmp had the be the worst fictional story fandom experience I’ve ever had I have people to this day saying I should kill myself for being sad that they portrayed mental illness so horrifically despite the pretty solid setup like cmon man. That’s a normal thing to be upset about. Put your death threat efforts into getting paid so u can buy carts or something like can we all just smoke and be human beings for a second. Even me setting this to nobody can reblog bc I am legit that terrified of these fans is craaaazy like PLEASE TRUST THOSE FURRIES WHO SELL PERCS THEY COULD SAVE YOU FROM THIS HATRED!!!!!!😭😭😭
101 notes · View notes
Text
i really hate feeling any kind of mad or irritated with my mom because it makes me feel overwhelmed with guilt but she really is not very understanding about how tired and burnt out i feel which is extremely frustrating to me
3 notes · View notes
murderballadeer · 8 months
Text
Tumblr media
someone tagged my rear window post with this… please do not i don’t want to be a heritage post… also that thing’s like a year old how can it already be a heritage post
7 notes · View notes
corset · 3 months
Text
Fuck me fuck me fuck I’m going to die fuck fuck god fuck I have to get a stupid shot for work kill me
3 notes · View notes
ironhusband · 1 year
Text
Thinking about Erik snapping at Charles with “well maybe you should have fought harder for them” and the pain in his eyes when Charles told him they didn’t want the same things.
#cherik#going insane Erik sitting in that awful cell thinking that Charles will never rescue him but he’ll still know Erik didn’t do this#and him learning Charles thinks he’s a murderer a monster - the one person who had never thought that of him besides his parents - and that#Charles thinks he did do it and he hates everything so much because if Charles gave up hope on him if even Charles is unwilling to fight for#him anymore maybe he truly is a monster and killing raven for the future is just a who he is#thinking of how much it would break Erik of Charles called him a monster to his face#‘you abandoned us all’ but what he means is you abandoned me! you sent me away and you let me rot in prison and you gave up on me#anyways!!! the way Erik wanted Charles to fight for one thing and that was him and he didn’t!! he just gave up and sent him away#listen ok I know Erik left him bleeding on a beach with no way of getting out of there but man I will always be side Erik in the divorce#look at the day the man had!!! he’s paralyzed by fear when confronting his abuser and then Charles tells him to not kill him even tho Erik-#needed it to feel safe like watch the scene watch it!!! and then he’s facing genocide again and this time he can lift the coin and save his#people. then Charles gets shot and he blames ERIK and then he breaks up with Erik like ok I know he’s wounded and all but the fact the#fandom is like ‘oh Charles didn’t mean for them to go he was shot and mad Erik should know better’#but we’re not like ‘oh Erik faced his childhood abuser and then relived something very similar to his trauma#got blamed for his lover’s injury (and like he doesn’t blame himself for him mom too) and then broken up with. he went through so much#lasting emotional trauma in the span of less than one hour how can he know better’#and there’s like a good explanation for why Charles would still blame him like Erik was wearing the helmet he couldn’t have picked up on all#that depth without one of the senses he relies on. but the fandom being like Erik is the bad person in this instance#it seems unfair. also it screams I’m a gentile honestly.#also you can’t tell me part of Erik wasn’t like ‘maybe he’d be better off without me’ when he left the beach#x men#Charles Xavier#erik lehnsherr#ramble rumble#now just don’t think of ‘let him come’ being Erik hoping Charles will finally fight for him and say they should have been together#and instead Charles throws more unfair (well about raven) blame in his face
31 notes · View notes
Text
oof when you think the childhood trauma isn’t that bad anymore and then you gotta tell ur dad something you don’t want to and running away and starting a new life with a new identity looks like a better alternative😅
3 notes · View notes
eclipsedsuns · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
I posted 15,064 times in 2022
That's 8,714 more posts than 2021!
964 posts created (6%)
14,100 posts reblogged (94%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@governmentbusiness
@whystuck
@theonewhocouldmakemestay
@skysofrey
@tolerateit
I tagged 6,562 of my posts in 2022
#shut up carley - 741 posts
#favorite shows: doctor who - 451 posts
#favorite people: taylor swift - 283 posts
#answered - 190 posts
#the moment i queue - 183 posts
#favorite people: taylor swift - 165 posts
#doctor who - 160 posts
#otp: i had a duty of care - 155 posts
#favorite characters: clara oswald - 154 posts
#prev tags - 153 posts
Longest Tag: 140 characters
#imagine being like ‘omg i’m so i’ll love with you. your family is poor and i hate poor people. but you’re pretty. god your family is so poor
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Tumblr media Tumblr media
See the full post
849 notes - Posted August 30, 2022
#4
neil has been banging out the tunes for sixteen slutty slutty years
1,220 notes - Posted April 13, 2022
#3
Tumblr media Tumblr media
See the full post
2,323 notes - Posted March 4, 2022
#2
“i love you” “it’ll pass” // “i don’t deserve a friend like you” “clara, i’m terribly sorry, but i am exactly what you deserve” // “if you are intolerable, let me be the one to tolerate you” // “i’ll take care of you.” “it’s rotten work” “not to me. not if it’s you.” // “you betrayed me. you betrayed my trust. you betrayed our friendship. you betrayed everything that i’ve ever stood for. you let me down!” “then why are you helping me?” “do you think i care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?”
2,774 notes - Posted February 10, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Tumblr media
17,600 notes - Posted May 22, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
14 notes · View notes
fleshdyke · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
me currently ^
#(csa warning for tags)#jeeesus i am so done with everything. its not wven that bad i dont know why i’m as upset as i am#school is just fucking hell the past couple days for some reason. even though we literally just had march break. idk. the cycle is really#hitting me hard lately i guess#and my fucking anxiety is coming back like i swear to god everyone is staring at me and laughing and i know it’s not true but jfc it feels#like it. it hasn’t been this bad since before my diagnosis#and i’m absolutely convinced my friends fucking hate me and we’ve kicked ppl out of our friend group before (they were racist and#transphobic) and im so fucking scared it’ll happen to me#and i know it’s a completely unfounded fear but oh my god its fucking paralyzing#and i feel like im seven again and completely and utterly alone and im so so so scared of it happening again#im so fucking scared of being alone. i just want someone to talk to#and like the reason i’m spiralling isn’t even important. it’s literally bc some of my friends have stopped eating lunch with me#like it’s so fucking stupid but i can’t get over it#and two of them don’t bc they got imto relationships and im happy for them and i know its not expected or anything to get into one in hs#like logically i know that and i tell myself that all the time but godddd it doesnt stop me from feeling like im fucking broken all the time#literally not a single person has ever seen me as anything other than a friend. and im not even fully convinced abt that.#like. why does everyone have experiences with ppl liking them and not a single person ever has liked me#like what the fuck is so wrong with me that no one will ever love me#literally the only fucking person who has ever wanted me. EVER. was a grown fucking man that raped me as a child#and i cant even fucking remember it. I CANT REMEMBER WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE WANTED#and i know its some sick twisted way to look at it. like this grown fucking man raped me when i was younger than 8 and all i can think about#is how that was the only time anyone’s ever wanted me#and like i don’t even actually WANT anything. i just want someone to like me. i want someone to like me so fucking bad#the scariest part abt it is that i want it to fucking happen again because i just want to be wanted#i’m absolutely fucking terrified of never being wanted. ever. it’s the scariest shit in the world to me#bc as far as my life has been it’s been true. all my childhood bullies have been fucking right#the only time i have ever been desirable was when i was younger than 8. now people literally fucking gag when they look at me#and i dont fucking know what to do#rambles#vent
10 notes · View notes
mabelsguidetolife · 8 months
Text
my sister’s trying to revamp an old ya novel idea she had at like fourteen years old and she used chatgpt to fill in gaps like names……. anyways i gave her some better ideas because i’m a human being
3 notes · View notes
yasha-chainbreaker · 1 year
Text
It’s literally so .. how your siblings are often your worst enemy when you’re young and then not even five years later you’re ride or die but still willing to murder the fuck out of each other
3 notes · View notes
itsrocketsurgery · 1 year
Text
if i was someone who’s capable of making a video game i’d like to make a game that has similar vibes as like childrens horror shit but is like genuinely scary borderline traumatizing as a sort of statement that the internet is not safe for kids and parents need to be more responsible for the content that children consume bc if u don’t ur kid will end up a little fucky
2 notes · View notes